#EVERY COOPER GANG DYNAMIC IS SO GOOD

[totally-correct-shenanigans]

alright guys. it's that time of Major wants to Fuck Around.

[jeonstellate]

love is: a favor

yoo kihyun loathed every fiber of your being; but perhaps, just like everything else, even his own feelings weren’t as they seem.

✇༄ yoo kihyun x afab!reader

✇༄ mafia!au, arranged marriage!au, secret baby!au — angst(?)

✇༄ paragraph format — 2.7K words

masterlist | love is · · · masterlist | a journey

[gif’s full credit belongs solely to its owner]

chapter eight: a life after you

Yoo Kihyun was sure he would be the first one to tie the knot amongst MX’s core members. Rightfully so, too, because his relationship was the longest, most stable one — which was a feat only followed by Minhyuk’s.

Almost four years had already passed since he went down on one knee — and three since his betrothed betrayed his trust. He wouldn’t deny a lot had changed since then, especially in terms of himself and MX, albeit some still managed to stay the same.

Most of the changes that occurred were predictable, like Minhyuk’s engagement and eventual wedding. Even Changkyun’s and Jooheon’s respective breakups weren’t at all surprising, either, especially given the number of times the former and his significant other separated and the times the latter failed to retain his romantic ties.

The current status of MX’s relations with SVT wasn’t shocking, either, despite its much friendlier dynamic compared to three years ago. SVT had always been both MX’s enemy and ally after all, so it was normal that the scales of their relations leaned a little bit more towards the latter category nowadays.

However, what was highly unpredictable was how well MX and SVT would get along. Although it wasn’t the first time the two gangs cooperated, it was definitely the first time they got along really well — even up to the point that Shownu actually considered accepting S. Coups’ proposal for a permanent alliance.

Shownu first consulted the other six before he met with S. Coups again. He listened to all of their opinions, noted down all of their views, and addressed all their concerns to make a decision for MX’s best interest. Ultimately, the core members’ primary worry came down to permanently associating their name with the gang whose righthand stole Ryuki’s betrothed.

Albeit MX members separate their personal affairs from their business as much as they could, Shownu and the rest deemed it best for Ryuki to have the final say.

"MX has decided to accept your proposed alliance," MX’s leader spoke on behalf of his brothers.

Frankly, Ryuki didn’t expect his brothers to take the betrayal and the heartbreak he suffered through into consideration. Yes, his former betrothed had an affair with a SVT member, but that was a matter that concerned his personal life — not MX. And, as they all swore in the beginning, personal things mustn’t affect MX — especially if they could be helped.

Still, Ryuki appreciated their gesture tremendously — even if it wasn’t enough motivation to comfortably share the closure he got from his former beloved.

"So, who’s the chosen groom?"

The proposed alliance would unfortunately impact their personal lives, most especially of a particular member. Truthfully, the required marriage between a core member of MX and a SVT-affiliated person was almost a dealbreaker for them, but the promised benefits of having SVT’s assistance was too good to let go.

"Wonho has volunteered to be so."

chapter nine: a half-open secret

Kihyun had had almost three whole years to forget. He knew, right from the start, that his journey would be difficult — especially given that he had known his former betrothed for a decade. Still, by pure determination, assisted by MX’s workload, he managed to come a long way.

Unbeknownst to the rest of MX’s core, you — his former beloved — actually tried your best to leave him the best closure possible before you left his life indefinitely.

"Never blame yourself for what I did, okay?" You had said then. "Just blame me; blame everything on me. Then live your life, like you never met me."

At first, he thought nothing of your request. He was too overwhelmed by his suppressed emotions to see through your words, so he just took them quite literally. He didn’t blame himself, as you insisted, but he didn’t blame you, either. Instead, he just let his emotions manifest into hatred towards you.

It wasn’t until much later when he thought deeper about his last interaction with you. Upon actually thinking your words over one sleepless night, he became mystified by your apparent insistence that he should loathe you. However, by then, his negative feelings towards you had already been deeply rooted in his heart — so his new curiosity never really mattered.

That was, until SVT’s Labri hurriedly entrusted his niece to Ryuki and MX’s care.

Admittedly, MX’s and SVT’s relationship with one another had significantly improved over the years. Their business collaborations had become more frequent than ever, just as their celebratory dinners were.

During those shared nights, Ryuki tried his best to avoid being alone with Hoshi — after all, even if his mafia and personal lives were as separate as they could be, it was still hard to see the person who took his former love away. He couldn’t risk jeopardizing MX’s relationship with SVT by being aggressive in any form, so he opted to distance himself whenever possible. However, to make his avoidance to Hoshi more subtle, he also chose to build a wall between him and the rest of SVT. In that way, Hoshi wasn’t singled out — because he treated all of them almost the same way.

Ryuki’s course of action didn’t give him any chance to get close to any SVT members, unlike I.M who eventually befriended Player. Thus, he never expected to be specifically entrusted with SVT’s next generation.

And, yet, here he was: cradling Labri’s niece like she was his own.

And, to add onto the strangeness of it all, Labri’s niece just had to uncannily resemble him — with unmistakable hints of you, his former love, in her features.

He knew those three years apart were enough for him to disassociate you to the things and places you loved. Yet, as he found out after meeting Labri’s niece, those years weren’t enough to make him forget how you looked like. Not that his inability to completely forget you mattered, since no more positive feelings for you had remained within him. If anything, the child’s slight resemblance to you merely reminded him of the life you robbed him of.

If it was only Kihyun alone, he would’ve easily dismissed her resemblance to the both of you as a mere product of coincidence and imagination. However, (un)fortunately, his brothers were too wrapped around the little one’s finger.

"Why is Kian with you?" The most intriguing admirer, by far, was Hoseok — who mysteriously knew her name before anyone else did. Not even those who were present when Labri entrusted his niece knew her name because Labri had been in a rush, but, somehow, Hoseok did.

"How do you know her name?" Kihyun, upon hearing Changkyun’s confirmation of Labri’s niece’s name, couldn’t help but to feel suspicious.

Even more so when his brother merely replied "I’ve met her before" and didn’t offer anything else.

chapter ten: a life without me

Kian, as they found out her name was, was strangely particular on who she let carry her. Out of the seven MX core members, she only let Kihyun and Hoseok have the privilege. Albeit they have yet to see if Hyungwon would join the lucky ones after his sleep, the rest were blatantly denied with a shy smile.

Labri’s niece had no problem playing with anyone, though, so she was able to get close to everyone in no time. Still, despite the number of people who were more than willing to be the subject of her attention, she gravitated to Kihyun nevertheless. Thus, he ended up always being in her close proximity even as she played with the others.

MX members were understandably too curious about Kian’s parentage. Between Hoseok’s vague answers to their inquiries and Kian’s stark resemblance to Kihyun, the others deemed it appropriate to share their respective suspicions to one another. Ultimately, they all seemed to think that Kian had got to be related to Kihyun somehow.

Unsurprisingly, Hoseok didn’t give any input on the theory the rest seemed to agree on. They figured he most likely couldn’t be bothered — partly because he had Kian’s undivided attention and he had no problem reciprocating it so.

Of course, that was until he said something that suggested otherwise.

"Kian, let’s go wake up your godfather." He scooped her up from the floor, without sparing anyone a glance. "We wouldn’t want him to miss all the fun."

Hoseok’s words might’ve been simple, but they weren’t without any hidden meaning — prompting the remaining MX to immediately confer amongst themselves once Hoseok and Kian were out of earshot. After all, he just dropped the most crucial hint for confirming their theory.

Quite literally, it was a recall to a night they had dismissed long ago.

"I asked . . . [first name] . . . to make me the kid’s godfather . . . in exchange for keeping quiet until . . . they’re untraceable," Hyungwon had admitted one night, with alcohol slurring his words together and slowing the pace of his sentences. "That way, if something happened to them . . . I may have a chance to . . . protect the kid."

Albeit the mention of Kihyun’s child with his ex was never confirmed with sober lips, the evidences Kian personified were too much of a coincidence to be doubted without counter proof. Especially since MX kept on finding more reasons to believe that Labri’s niece was, indeed, related to Kihyun.

"The paper that had Kian’s name on it . . . it addressed her as Yoo Kian."

chapter eleven: a reversed secret

The last supporting evidence Kihyun was willing to take was the familiar doll Kian couldn’t sleep without: the very same hamster doll you took when you left. Although it wasn’t specially custom-made in any way, Kihyun personally had enough ignoring coincidences.

Kihyun didn’t voice out his own — more solidified — conclusion, partly because he found it difficult to utter. Somehow, saying it out loud felt equivalent to making his conclusion a reality — and, frankly, he wasn’t sure if he wanted it to be.

"You’ve figured it out, right?" Except neither Hyungwon nor Hoseok wanted him let it be.

The duo was obviously unapologetic in their decision to keep their knowledge out of reach to the rest. When confronted about their respective — selfish — choice, they left no room for arguments in their justifications and forcefully steered the discussion to the topic that mattered the most.

"What will you do now, then?"

When the doorbell rung and signaled Labri’s arrival to the MX house, Kihyun nonverbally answered Hoseok’s question.

By handing Kian to her uncle, bidding her a simple farewell, and nothing else.

Kihyun wasn’t denying reality: no one knew how SVT was really related to Kian, so he knew it was best not to make any rush decisions. After all, there was a chance she was more than just Labri’s niece from a friend — which was his your connection to SVT, as far as they were aware — especially if she was allowed to enter SVT’s base like she belonged there. As much as he wanted to keep her with him, he didn’t want to jeopardize MX’s alliance with SVT by forcefully taking what was theirs by circumstance.

Truthfully, he wouldn’t be able to answer if anyone asked how he felt upon knowing the truth behind the betrayal that changed the trajectory of his personal life. He had been harboring his resentment towards you for years now, so the revelation of the truth didn’t change anything within him. If anything, it merely made his hatred for you to spread even more. After all, it was one thing to be cheated on and another to be hidden a child from — albeit both spark intense levels of unfathomable heartbreak.

What Kihyun did know, however, was the fact that he wanted to ask you questions with answers only you could give — regardless of his strong preference to never see you again.

chapter twelve: a broken should’ve been

Kihyun firmly told MX to separate the complex issue surrounding Kian’s existence from their alliance with SVT. And true to his wishes, MX’s relationship with SVT wasn’t affected in any way. MX still carried out other successful business collaborations with SVT and Wonho’s engagement dinner still creeped close. As far as they know, SVT had no idea they — as a group — now know the truth about your betrayal and Kian’s parentage.

Even during Wonho’s engagement dinner, where MX’s and the rest of SVT’s cores were set to finally be introduced to his betrothed, MX didn’t utter a word about Kian. To their credit, Gorae almost did — especially after catching a glimpse of S. Coups’ lockscreen wallpaper with her on it, but Shownu was able to stop him just in time.

"Can we get a clue about Wonho’s betrothed?" Honey asked suddenly, covering his members’ peculiarity by stealing SVT’s attention away.

S. Coups, understanding that the other nineteen people were dying to know who he picked for the alliance, obliged — none the wiser about the real reason Honey asked. Not that any of them had to feign an interest, since SVT’s leader knew exactly how to hook them in.

"They’re family to me — and to SVT, too, by extension," S. Coups started. "Unfortunately, even if they’re family, a favor must be paid no matter what."

"Surely, you don’t mean—" Moon suddenly wore a dark expression — as did the rest of SVT. Ryuki couldn’t tell for certain, but he swore he could identify disbelief and betrayal amongst the simultaneous emotions they had donned.

Contrast to his members, however, S. Coups was void of any emotion that reflect theirs. "I do."

The deafening silence that suddenly engulfed MX’s fellow mafia gang was enough to let Player to be heard, despite his whisper-volume and deep voice. "Isn’t your way of collecting a favor a little too contradictory?

"They asked you to get them out of the mafia world and, in return, you want them to marry into a mafia?"

S. Coups agreed without any hesitation. "They should’ve known not to make a deal with a devil."

If Ryuki was asked if he had any guesses based on S. Coups’ hint alone, he wouldn’t be able to provide any. However, if Player’s reaction was also taken into account, especially with H. One’s drunk confession in mind, one person immediately popped up. Especially when S. Coups took the liberty to fill MX in, as an attempt to explain why his members reacted like so.

According to SVT’s leader, Wonho’s betrothed was formerly engaged to the love of their life, who also happened to be a member of a mafia. Frightened with the implications of carrying a child of a mafia member, they decided to run and cut ties. Unable to change their mind after a number of attempts, S. Coups ultimately helped them devise and carry out an escape plan, in exchange for the favor being returned later on.

Ryuki was intrigued by the eerie similarity of S. Coups’ story and H. One’s confession — as were the rest of MX, whose faces morphed from curiosity to realization the more the mafia leader went on. If their suspicions were correct, it meant that—

"You really are a devil, Choi Seungcheol."

—Wonho’s betrothed was you.

"Thank you for finally joining us, cuz," S. Coups gestured for you to take the only empty seat left on the table — which coincidentally happened to be across Ryuki. "What took you so long?"

"Kian didn’t want me to go, so I had to put her down for a nap first." You shrugged, not minding the intensified stares you got after mentioning Kian’s name.

Ryuki was internally cursing whoever made the only unoccupied chair to be right opposite him, because they were now solely responsible for the blatant awkwardness that surrounded their long table. Everyone, even those that sat on the opposite ends, could clearly see how he followed your every move with his eyes while you did everything not to meet his stare.

"Why didn’t you just bring her along?" Your cousin, fearless as ever, continued to converse with you — unaffected by the sudden change in the air.

Everyone watched as you easily threw a glare in his direction, puzzling them momentarily with your fearlessness that seemed on-par with the mafia leader. "Who am I marrying?" You uttered after you looked away from your cousin, deliberately choosing not to reply to his comment.

Funnily enough, the second those words left your lips was the same instant Ryuki confirmed that his three years worth of resentment was still very present in him.

"Kihyun," Wonho answered without hesitation.

Although, it seemed, his resentment wasn’t enough to be comfortable with witnessing you marry someone else.

"Me," Ryuki answered at the same time his brother did. "You’re marrying me."

[heliianth]

Hey!! I've been thinking about your httyd urban fantasy au lately and I was wondering if you could share a bit more? Like maybe about the dragon rider gang? Like Fishlegs or Astrid? Or a bit more about Snotlout and Hiccup's dynamic?

No pressure! But it's such a cool concept and this is a free pass to talk about it if you want to :D

Have a good day!!

Ahjkasg hi its rlly sweet u think abt my stupid little au !!!!

i talked about Astrid here. shes very familiar with dragons but very complacent in the exploitation of them. so she doesnt hate dragons but she doesnt love them, theyre just a means to an end for what she wants (recognition). her "romantic flight" equivalent in this au is learning that Stormly thinks of her like a friend instead of like how a pet thinks of an owner. shes the first to approach Hiccup about joining his ridiculous vigilante shit

Fishlegs and Astrid are actually friends before they meet Hiccup in this au!! Fishlegs family is in a similar situation to Astrid's; his mom deals in economic research of dragons and while Fishlegs has a different opinion on them (hes intimidated and thinks the amount of workplace injuries that occur with captive dragons isnt worth the economic gain they could hypothetically provide), he still doesnt quite reach the same respect or conclusion until Astrid and Hiccup show him Toothless and Stormfly. he doesnt approve of the vigilante stuff and will hang back and do "base operations" more than he goes out with them, but he becomes really passionate about it once they bring Meatlug back from a mission

Ruffnut and Tuffnut are completely blank slates as it comes to dragons. they kind of have the normal kid "holy fuck dragons are cool" idea but their daily life isn't involved with them at all. Ruffnut gets involved because Tuffnut shows interest in Hiccup's bullcrap once they find out about Toothless, and shes kind of like Fishlegs in the respect that shes more hesitant than someone might think, but she joins to support Tuffnut (who is really fascinated by the loser kid suddenly having a night fury). eventually they find Barf + Belch on a completely solo mission. Ruffnut had difficulty with Barf because he kind of represented "youre in this for good now" at first, while Tuffnut mainly does it for the feeling of freedom. i imagine their parents have really high expectations even though they are kind of absent and Tuffnut wants to escape that while Ruffnut is more practical

Snotlout and Hiccup are cousins and their dynamic is pretty well covered. he, Astrid, and the twins knew each other before Hiccup moved in with Snotlout. initially Snotlout thinks Hiccup is being fucking ridiculous and is afraid of getting into trouble with Spitelout, but once Astrid gets on board he starts being more willing to cooperate and then help. he and Hiccup have a brief rough patch where they're really mad at each other; Snotlout bonded with Hookfang while on a really simple rescue & release mission, which complicated it enough that they were caught by the authorities, and Hiccup got arrested (but not "found out" in the superhero sense which sounds stupid but yk what i mean. like on different charges, like trespassing or refusing to cooperate with police. which i mentioned earlier somewhere?). that leads to Stoick finding out about the vigilantism and them needing to hide Toothless for a while* and they fight with each other over that. it blows over but every once and a while Snotlout oscillates between feeling guilty and angry about it all

*(ive kinda decided that Toothless's capture was government-funded due to the threat night furies as a species pose. like watch httyd1 the potential that they have for destruction if weaponized is insane. and by releasing Toothless and befriending him, Hiccup has already done something highly illegal)

hope this satisfies ur brain ^-^

[sarcophagid]

Uhh what’s your favorite TR arc and why??

BLACK DRAGONS CHRISTMAS MURDER ARC

i think ive talked abt this b4 but it just has so much stuff i like in it. its my favorite in terms of storytelling i'm not deep i like easily recognizable gimmicks for babies idc. theres a bunch of reasons i like it so:

the kisaki-hanma-chifuyu-takemichi teamup i love their begrudging cooperation and their hostility...i miss them every day... when will C4U/KillemAll/The Hanmas come back from the war... i see them in every group of 4... the wiggles, teletubbies, tmnt... it was a team born to die but what a beautiful birth...

i think the tenuous dynamics between the gangs at the time was fun the suspense was good. baji just died, kisaki and hanma still in toman, black dragons about to go warring with everyone, no one likes each other it was a great spawning ground for drama

yuzuha was one of my favorite main characters of the arc... no one else understands this... her sigma philosphy of killing taiju. i talked about this more in an older ask but in summary: i like the “inescapable violence” theme in the christmas arc. yuzuha kills taiju to protect hakkai, hakkai takes the blame to protect yuzuha and becomes BD leader to end up just as corrupt as taiju, cycle of doom. neither yuzuha and hakkai had any bad intention they had the same ‘desire to protect, to do good’ that got pushed to the point of doing bad things. even taiju seems to have his version of good will but theres just something up with that guy dawg.

i really wish they’d say smth abt yuzuha in the future of the manga bcz what is she even doing while her little brothers in the middle of the chaos but also the plot has expanded so much by now that unfortunately she probably won’t make another major appearance -_-

on the other side, taiju was my favorite antagonist, i never draw him but he has one of my favorite designs in the series even though every panel of his jumpscares you. takemichi saw him once and immediately started getting night terrors

going off on a tangent though, i'm... iffy about the 'redemption'. i like taiju but this is on the level of him being an imaginary dude with a big role in a story. the point of the story is that you dont like him, hes still a huge douchewagon... i don’t think the main cast (including hakkai) would still be cool with him even though its been 2 years it’s not something that just ‘gets better with time’. taiju didn’t even really say he was gonna be a better person (im pretty sure he said smth the opposite lmfao but i don;t remember well). in the timeskip, it could be interpreted that he did make an effort to improve given how seriously he took grieving hakkais death, but thats 10+ years after the affair, and even then it’s only an implication! that sketch of taiju with mana and luna never sat right with me why does mitsuya trust him sm all of a sudden...in my opinion they really didnt need him to return?? there are better candidates to nearly castrate sanzu for threatening takemichi, fight the living legends, etc. (what happened to the rest of toman, or just ask anyone here they’ll nominate their little boyfriend ran haitani or smth) i could talk about this a lot but TLDR i think it’d be fine if he just went away lol you dont need to have them make up it doesnt make sense

honorable mention! tenjiku arc was fun i liked getting to see the stories of the side cast (esp kawata brothers, mucho, emma)

[monkey-network]

Good Stuff: The Bad Guys

WARNING: *Spoilers*

Being Bad? Going Good? Both never felt this great.

I'll admit, it felt Dreamworks had a recent streak of underwhelming features following How to Train Your Dragon 3. Not all bad, but I don't believe Spirit Untamed was on anyone's minds last year. Then The Bad Guys swerved in and that hope is alive again. I won't beat around things, I've been anticipating this since the trailer hit and I haven't felt this way since Captain Underpants. So with all that said, is the Bad Guys good or did it turn out bad? Well, enough about Bad Guy

Let's run it back to The Good Guys club, so to speak

For an adaptation of the books, it is a mixed bag. They stick with mainly the first four books which are the most grounded; not kidding when I say this goes off the rails past that mark. They do Foxington better here than in the books; reminded me a lot of Barbara from the LEGO Batman movie. The Police Chief, voiced by Lois Griffin, is a welcome addition to the cast (y'know ACAB except Misty Luggens). The titular Bad Guys themselves are a hit and a miss. I liked that they were an already made team of thieves with a good rapport, but what's missing was their initial development from the books. You get why'd they would be a team, you love seeing them together, but it's not like Sly Cooper where, even in its beginning, you get to see the trio have their separate conversations or dynamics. Understandable because it's a movie, but still, the book did things better by having the bad guys not be as established a group and working from there. Then there's Professor Marmalade who is...yeah, spoilers ahead but...

"Okay, so now the tier list looks like this"

Didn't even need to see any spoilers, Marmalade was a predictable bad guy, there was nothing to throw me off that he would be the bad guy, I never took him seriously as a bad guy, and they don't really do anything outside make a rift between Wolf and Snake. The books did better but then again, the books go off the rails faster than this movie. Like why not make everyone except Mr. Wolf joke about him being the twist villain? It falls in line the writing of the books but doesn't take away from the scale of Marmalade's plan nor makes Mr. Wolf look that stupid. Basically do what Captain Underpants did with Professor Poopypants. They set up a better twist ending to make up for this, but the villain himself was boring, wack, and this honestly bogged the plot down to a more predictable outing. What definitely saves this from being bad though...

This movie is such a fucking vibe

Put an egg on this film because it'll sizzle and season itself with how much fun this overall is. The soundtrack fucking slaps. Every lackluster moment is picked up with three other great moments. The first ten minutes is one of the best openers in all of Dreamworks, Diane is a delight every time she's onscreen, I love that they subverted the notably cliched dance party finale, there's several moments that perfectly shows Mr. Wolf and Mr. Snake at his best, the titular Bad Guys themselves are just an enjoyable gang regardless of my gripes. It's on par with the Captain Underpants film where it could not have a sequel film or series in its future and I wouldn't mind because it's satisfying enough whether or not you read the books. And the animation is wondrous, possessing an unique energy that's a good blend of Sony's fast pace stuff and Disney's more grounded stuff. Hate to say it, but it feels like a CG anime at points, there no other film like this. It's like if Lupin the 3rd (part 2 Lupin, at least) directed a Zootopia spin-off and you can see that jazzy and kinetic flair at its best.

And the art, people, is genuinely refreshing

The Bad Guys just fucks so hard. I have the feeling this'll be compared to Megamind, though if Megamind is the reserved but passionate older brother, Bad Guys is the middle sibling that's more lively but is responsible where it matters. It was a fresh movie from Dreamworks, one that builds & builds, ending with a breezy jovial feeling. It's not complex, but again, they make this such a vibe that it eradicated any doubt I could've had with this film. Screw it, I'm not rating this...

I'm just glad a movie like this exists. I’m glad this exists.

[julyarchives]

Thicker Than Blood || (M) || Ch. 01

Growing up in a tough neighborhood had you learning to deal with hard situations, the occasion leads you to cooperate with the mafia organization that took care of your neighborhood - Pentagon. Looking after yourself and valuing your safety brought you to adapt to the moment, but the line between working for them and protecting yourself is very blurry when you are forced to live under their roof.

→ Pairing: Pentagon OT9 x Reader

→ Genre: Smut; Mafia AU.

→ Words:  2.2K

→ Contains: Mentions of Alcohol; Mentions of Violence.

→ A/n: So this is our Pentagon Mafia AU Series! This story will be multi-chaptered and we will add more tags as the story goes on, we have big plans for it! We hope you guys like it and it is worth the wait!

→ Index: 01 • 02 • 03

Chapter 01 - The Collectors

The cute jeans and red t-shirt you wore barely matched the bar you currently were on behind the counter. The place was quite nice but it was still too rustic for your liking, too brown and dark. Usually, the customers were rustic as well, and had a certain grumpiness to them, just like the place. You shrugged for the nth time while lost in thoughts. Working at a bar on a Tuesday night was the perfect situation for boredom, and bored you were.

Thinking back, you barely understood how you got the job anyway, walking in there one day to kick your friend's ass for drinking while you had a job to do with him and the owner liked your style. He needed someone behind the counter, you needed the money, it was perfect. You were rather young and sweet, you knew that often resolving some complicated shit and arguments in the bar but you also knew how to answer when needed and to take no one's shit home, you still stood up for yourself. Ok so maybe working at a bar was the perfect job for you.

Not wanting to dwell on how you wanted a better paid perfect job, you busied yourself by watching the entrance. It was Tuesday, so you've been kind of anxious the whole day waiting for them to show up. You almost gave your excitement away when two figures entered the bar and sat in front of you on the bar stools.

"Hello, boys. The usual?", you asked them with a bright smile.

"Please, Y/N".

"Right away", you chipped as you turned to get them their cold drinks. It'd be funny to see them drink a sweet cocktail instead of anything stronger if you didn't know them a bit better.

Wooseok and Yuto were young. Sweet and awkward boys that most older people liked and wanted to pamper. That's what you heard anyway whenever you spoke to the neighbors. You also knew they were attached to the hip, always together and always messing with each other. They had a third part to their best friend dynamic and you only saw him a few times at the bar, but you knew they clearly loved each other as brothers.

But that information didn't add up to the other information you had on the boys. The reason you expected them every Tuesday was because of their work. And that was what confused you. As every person in the region knew, there was only one force to respect and listen and that was the Pentagon gang. No, not a gang. It was straight down mafia business and these two cute young boys were their collectors. So every Tuesday they went out to collect the fee from every block and at the end, they'd crash at the bar to chat and drink something.

Seeing them every week made you realize how nice they were and quickly put the whole mafia business behind them. You, better than anyone, understood that you gotta do what you gotta do to survive. Since then, Wooseok and Yuto became more open with you and always brought back gossip when they had a good day. After all, mafia men were still men. Well, boys.

"Here you go, guys", you placed the drinks down and smiled sweetly.

"Thanks, Y/N", Yuto had a deep voice and it always managed to startle you.

"So, any gossip?", you chuckled and the boys followed, lowering their heads as if to share a secret with you.

"Guy from the butcher shop was working alone", Wooseok said, "caught his employee with his girl".

"No way!", you truly were shocked at the irrelevant news.

"Yep", he said while Yuto nodded. "Oh, and someone's trying to get inside our territory. We saw a warning at a wall, directed at us and, well, at all of you".

"What?!", you shouted and they looked at you like you just offended their entire family. You were confused. One, why were they telling you information that may be confidential? Two, how could they speak about something dangerous so casually?

"We have orders to let you know, actually", Yuto said as if he was reading your mind. "We know who these people are but not their faces. We thought maybe they'd start by frequenting a place where they can get more intel on our people".

"Here then".

"Hm, yeah", Wooseok nodded. "The warning only said to be careful who is loyal to us or the community would show us. We guess they want to turn people against us"

"More people, more money. An entire neighborhood against us wouldn't be controlled by usual methods. So, that's when you come in".

"If you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting, then no way". You were bold enough to talk back and they only raised their eyebrows at you.

"We only need you to be on the lookout for someone different", Wooseok clarified, "if there's at least one person asking the wrong questions about the community, you gotta let us know".

"Helps if we can identify a face", Yuto shrugged.

"Do I have a say in this?", you already knew the answer.

"As much as you do about our fee, Y/N".

"Fine. But if they come for me, I won't wait for your boys to come to rescue me. I'll bolt", you said with a sigh in defeat.

"You won't be alone", Wooseok said as Yuto typed away on an old phone. "You'll be getting a visit from tomorrow on, he's our shapeshifter, blends in wherever".

"If you have a guy like that, why put me to watch anyone?"

"Y/N", Yuto sighed and looked straight into your eyes. "We could burst into any safe house right now and do whatever we pleased with whoever was in our way. But we do value our community, that's why we got hold of this business in the first place. The bar is where everyone comes for information and you know that. Don't forget why you're behind this counter, to begin with. We need the bartender to do her job and chat with her customers as she does. The info will come to you".

"I-", you were starstruck and kept glancing from Yuto to Wooseok, hands on the counter. "I- this is the most you have spoken to me since we met". It came out accidentally and you wanted to slap yourself.

Wooseok laughed and Yuto smiled at you. You could feel the heat on your cheeks but only nodded to yourself, still processing everything. They finished their drinks in one big gulp and got up, Yuto nodding at you still with a cute smile on his lips, one that didn't match his previous words. Wooseok watched as Yuto walked out of the bar and chuckled at your expression that slowly was turning grumpy.

"I know you'll do just fine. It's not like us to put people in our business but to protect people, we need you", he was leaning forward, as if to make you see him and only him. "So, congratulations, you got promoted!", he laughed.

"Yeah, I'm the lookout kid", you definitely were grumpy now. "You need me to protect people but who protects me?".

"Me", Wooseok said a bit too fast. "I mean, Pentagon does. And you'll have the right company for that, don't worry. He'll be here tomorrow night".

Wooseok smiled at you again and turned away from you, leaving you to your thoughts. Why the hell was this happening? You got why this way was safer to find out who was behind the threat but you still were unsure. Well, it's not like you could say no without a valid reason. And apparently, your safety wasn't one.

You watched Wooseok leave and sighed. Getting their glasses to clean up, you kept thinking about all the things that could go wrong but also all the things that could go right. Part of you wanted to impress them and come out as a hero, it'd give you something else to do instead of just being the bartender. You laughed at the absurdity of it all and quickly shoved it all in the back of your head, deciding to let the future self deal with the situation and this guy who'd meet you tomorrow, slipping back into the boredom of a Tuesday night at the bar once again.

Laying on your bed, your mind raced nonstop and you couldn't sleep no matter how much you tried. Yuto's words kept coming back and you felt even more deflated each time. "Don't forget why you're behind this counter, to begin with". You knew your upbringing was shitty and you had to fend for yourself a long time but you honestly thought that it didn't matter much until now.

Your parents fled when you were eight. They had some issues with themselves and suddenly having a family became too much of a cage for them and they fled. They left you with your grandmother and never came back. Your grandma was a saint, she was sweet and loving but she was sick enough to not be able to work, so you toughen up and started bringing money home by twelve years old.

You smiled thinking about how she raised you with such care and love that you managed to get that trait from her even if the streets treated you like shit. You discovered soon enough that all the love your grandma had was all the love you could get because no one liked a little girl who put her hands on whatever she could find to sell and get hers. You met a few people while you grew up and managed to turn out just fine even if it bruised you more than you liked to admit.

When you were around seventeen your grandma passed, you thankfully blocked whatever memory you had of her suffering and only focused on her happy memories. Since then you got her small and simple house and got more involved in the community, everyone who respected your grandma finally understanding why you were a kid like you were. Fast forward a few years and you got the job at the bar and things got a bit better.

You got up from the bed and scoffed at how things were mostly shoved on your face enough that you had to go with the flow every time. Fucking Pentagon taking over the neighborhood when you were a kid and now this. You heard more than participated in the whole protecting mafia business when you were younger, but the situation wasn't strange to you. Getting around in the streets you knew things and the most important one was to follow the organization's rules.

When you were twelve and started to hit the streets, you knew very well to not mess with the men from the org. But also soon enough you learned that the best way to earn anything good was to be on their good side. So you started to run a few errands for them and earned a good amount. Of course, you had nothing to do with them but still, it was a good connection. You didn't know much about the members in the hierarchy but you were sure that no one from the time you were a kid was still in their ranks.

You were sure mafia business was very harsh and violent but the boss was too violent once upon a time and things got out of hand. The neighborhood they swore to protect was being targeted and they brought the fight to all people. Fortunately, it ended after a few months of much fear and blood around the streets and you heard they all changed members. Rumor had it that it was their kids that took over when the parents died during the more violent times, at least in the high ranks. But you had stopped tending to them a few months before it went down so you had no idea for sure.

You only knew that Pentagon had a hard time getting people's trust again and started a more gentle approach with the community, hence why Wooseok and Yuto were dear to some people under their wings. They went over to everyone who had helped them directly and formally thanked and apologized for their trouble. Of course, they still terrified people who walked out of line and when the community respected them again, it was clear they were in charge. But now it seemed like they only cared about their own business and getting richer with their schemes instead of getting involved in a bloody gun war.

You realized you were standing in the middle of the corridor getting lost in thought and laughed to yourself before finishing the path to the kitchen to get water. The cold water helped you calm down and soon you were too busy sitting on the couch looking for any silly reality show to get lost into.

Halfway through the episode, you felt the sleep taking over you but being comfortable on the couch made you just pull a cover you kept there over you and stayed there, falling asleep in seconds. It was a very rough and long day, so you welcomed the slumber gratefully. Little did you know that while you succumbed to sleep in the living room, your phone buzzed in your bedroom, a small text that should be completely out of line appearing.

We trust you to do this safely but count on me to help. -WS.

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

Do you have any sly Cooper headcanons? I’ll apologise in advance if I’ve already asked you this. I have quite a few about Sly’s ancestors. And that Sly himself was fascinated with ballet for some reason.

SLY FASCINATED WITH BALLET

this is. so good i am adopting this headcanon now

and boy if you want headcanons uhhh. yea i have a few :)

sly isnt a full raccoon!! ofc most of his ancestors had raccoon partners (or adopted other raccoons) but conner actually married a cat! i know it's a gameplay thing, but him having cat genes is what makes him particularly silent when he walks... and makes him fall on his feet

penelope and murray are super besties and often watch wrestling matches together

a lot of coopers actually managed to take down clockwerk! i'm not saying the majority of them, but a lot of time they actually managed to destroy him piece by piece. they simply didn't know about the hatechip, so after a few years he regenerated

conner is one of the few who managed to take him down! his battle with him is what made him decide to stop this thief thing and instead focus on his recently pregnant wife because, man. that shit hurt

about conner, he was... a difficult person to deal with. he was similar to sly, but even more extra - and unfortunately, his ego was WAY bigger than his son's

the gang he had with mcsweeny and moreau (aka dr.m) was one he made out of need. he needed a brain and a brawn and found them. they were mostly co-workers at first, and his ego is what really changed the dynamics. m replied to that with frustration, especially since conner had the tendency to do what he wanted without listening to plans, while mcsweeny answered to that with ironic remarks. mcsweeny and conner eventually ended up becoming really good pals - the kind who obviously love eachother but can't stop messing with one another -, while with m, well.

m told clockwerk where conner and rosa (his wife) were hiding and is also the one who told him about sly :)

about that, sly isn't the only cooper clockwerk spared. he's the first one who didn't have the thievious raccoonus with him, thus making clocky's reasoning of "i wanted to show everyone that without ur book ur nothing" actually make sense but. the cooper's biggest weakness is empathy. clockwerk knows the best way to destry a cooper without killing them is taking it on their loved ones and, while not often... sometimes he spared one of them a child, a brother, a wife, a grandfather. leave them to mourn and wish they were the ones who died

aaaand on a better note, about the cooper and the thievious raccoonus! it's not actually written in english!! from slythunkamen, they all used a secret alphabet. it's often updated and a lot of times the meaning of new words is translated here and there, but it's something every cooper learns alongside their first language since they're little. sly would've gotten the book when he was 8 years old because he could read, write and speak fluently that second language

he taught murray and bentley to read it too, and bentley taught penelope after sly 3

back to clockwerk, i follow the hc (that i saw is kinda shared in the fandom?) that for regenerating, sometimes, he just waits for someone to take over him and then slowly takes control of their mind until he "comes back to life" - and i saw somewhere a post in which someone talked about a cooper doing it! actually, again not many... but more than one tried to take over. some of them seeked power, some other thought this could've put an end to this... some did it just for curiosity

otto van cooper became clockwerk out of curiosity and is actually the "incarnation" of clockwerk sly fights at the end of the first game

about people incarnated in clockwerk!!! neyla. i liked the idea of her being a claww gang member's relative, and i dig the idea of her being arpeggio's adoptive daughter :^3c

...about that idk about the english dub, but in italian they dont really mention who's the leader of the claww gang and. we all agree it's arpeggio right?

[johannas-motivational-insults]

“Friendship” in the Horde

Season 4 raised some interesting questions about how people who grew up in the Horde define friendship. Kyle claimed that his squadmates were his friends, despite how we've seen them bully him, and Scorpia admitted she didn’t even know how to be a good friend. We also saw further developments in Catra and Lonnie’s dynamic that have some interesting implications about their bond, both past and present. However, while these themes became more explicit this season, they are hardly new. The Horde worldbuilding is really quite brilliant, as the writers have been laying the foundation for these revelations by showcasing certain patterns since season one.

This got a little lengthy on me, but there was a lot to consider. The lack of healthy emotional expression and relationship modelling is one obvious problem in the Horde, but the hostile environment has also led to some very specific power dynamics and social structures. These structures, while potentially helpful in hostile environments, are maladaptive in terms of fostering healthy relationships. Ultimately, every character who grew up in the Horde is emotionally crippled. (I’m not even going into Adora, an excellent example, because her repression and communication problems are well-documented and I wanted to focus on characters still in this environment.)

Scorpia

Let’s start with Scorpia. Her revelation that she doesn’t understand what friendship is was a big moment for her, but for those of us who have been watching closely, it’s no big surprise. Scorpia was so desperate for a meaningful connection that she latched onto the first person who showed any signs of considering her a friend, ignoring all the red flags indicating that the relationship was not healthy. Actually, she didn’t ignore them so much as not recognize them, because she didn’t even know what a healthy relationship looks like. To her, the fact that Catra invited her to her room and chose her to accompany her on a mission was enough for her to dub them the Superpal Duo.

Of course, we all know how that went for her. She continued to support Catra unconditionally despite the latter’s tendency to use Scorpia as her emotional punching bag. They did settle into a somewhat more reciprocal and caring relationship after Scorpia saved Catra against her orders during 2x05, proving that Catra was more important to her than the mission (even if that wasn’t what Catra thought she wanted). It’s sad when you think about it, because that was probably the first time Catra ever experienced her wellbeing being prioritized above all else.

Unfortunately, the revelation that Shadow Weaver had gone running back to Adora after betraying her triggered a trauma response and made her clam up again, lashing out at Scorpia and shutting her out even though she had done nothing to betray her trust. It took Catra blatantly attacking and insulting Scorpia when she failed to bring back Entrapta’s recordings (and some well timed reality checks from Emily) for Scorpia to realize that Catra was being a bad friend and she couldn’t win her over by being a good friend.

And actually, Scorpia’s confession in 4x10 that she “thought” she was being a good friend to Catra implies that she had since realized that she wasn’t actually being a good friend to Catra either. She knows the scorpions were a loyal people and she ascribes to that ideal, and she has so much love to give and always tries so hard to be positive, but not setting boundaries with people or demanding a measure of basic respect does nothing for them or you. Also, you can’t ignore the fact that Scorpia forced her affections on Catra, inserting herself into Catra’s life in a way that made her uncomfortable, and continued to ignore Catra’s attempts at setting boundaries with her (which is also very disrespectful). While Catra was certainly the aggressor, she was not the only one who failed in this partnership.

Let’s go back for a moment to Scorpia’s earliest indication that Catra might want to be her friend, when she confides in her and enlists her help coming up with and then executing a plan. Being chosen as Catra’s wingman seems to be important here, and perhaps she was wilfully ignoring how she was the only person who could make Catra’s plan work, but being confided in and trusted was huge to her. And since Horde soldiers are so used to being used, they don’t see it as a red flag. Catra actually flat out said Scorpia was the only person she could trust. How could a lonely gay not interpret that as a sign of being special to someone?

The squad

The importance of trust also becomes evident when considering the interactions among the main squad. Loyalty seems to be paramount in the Horde, not just the scorpion kingdom. Adora defecting to the Rebellion and leaving her squad behind was seen as a huge betrayal, and not just by Catra. Did anyone else want to cry when Lonnie struck back at Adora with “we were your friends” in 1x09? Lonnie was deeply hurt by Adora’s abandonment, feeding into her disillusionment with the Horde. Similarly, when Double Trouble revealed they had double-crossed Catra, her devastated reaction was not that her plans were ruined, but that they had betrayed her. That no doubt was also related to her previous betrayals, but also serves to highlight the importance of loyalty in their subculture.

While all the Horde characters were interesting to watch this season when it came to the themes of friendship, the arc was most pronounced in Lonnie. As I’ve mentioned previously, Scorpia had a short arc over one episode where her rosy worldview was destroyed, causing her to leave (much like Adora), while Lonnie was already a cynic who was aware of the Horde’s imperfections and had to go through more extreme hardships to detach from this unhappy but familiar environment (much like Catra, we hope).

Though she and the boys didn’t leave the Horde until the finale, her disillusionment was already evident in her first episode this season. After Catra berated them for something that wasn’t their fault and demanded they risk their lives to fix it (big Hordak energy), she had her first big revelation: “Catra doesn’t care about us, Adora left us. Everything they taught us in the Horde about loyalty is meaningless. It’s everyone for themselves.” In the next episode, she was frustrated by Scorpia’s naïve enthusiasm and trust in Catra, but it took a big blow up between her and Catra for her to finally decide she was done with her, done with the Horde in general.

Kyle represents a sort of middle ground between Lonnie and Scorpia in terms of outlook. He was not treated well in the Horde, but still believed in the ideals of loyalty and squad unity. He wanted to believe Catra had sent them out on a mission into the Whispering Woods because she trusted them and wanted it to be a team-building exercise. His take on it was: “She may be mean, but we’ve always had each other’s backs. Ever since we were kids.” He saw the squad as his family, including Catra (and previously Adora). It took Catra baring her claws and threatening to attack Lonnie outside of a battle sim for him to lose faith in her.

Bullying, the pecking order, and squad unity

As is clear by this point, the Horde defections this season were driven by Catra mistreating the others, but we can’t lose sight of how mistreatment is a fact of daily life in the Horde. And as I mentioned above with Lonnie, it’s those who were most aware of and desensitized to the mistreatment who had the hardest time naming it and leaving the toxic environment. Call it Stockholm Syndrome, call it the sunk cost fallacy, but either way once you’ve submitted to a system that dehumanizes you, it’s hard to admit that that system is wrong and leave it for a better life. Scorpia and Adora grew up somewhat privileged in the Horde in that they were destined for greatness, so they were never abused overtly and they had a level of protection from power-hungry cadets looking to claw their way to the top of the heap. They were already at the top and couldn’t be taken down, so they didn’t have to bully or be bullied.

The importance of pecking order is much more evident when considering people like Kyle, Catra, and Lonnie. Within their squad, Kyle is obviously the omega of the gang (get your heads out of the gutter, that is not what I mean), the one who gets blamed for everything that goes wrong and is constantly getting picked on. Lonnie shits on him, Catra shits on him, and even Rogelio gives him shit and goes along with the blame game. Despite all this, Kyle considers them his friends, his family.

This starts to make sense when you consider it in terms of intra vs. extra squad relations. Maybe the squad didn’t show Kyle any respect or treat him with kindness, but they did protect him in battle sims (sometimes lol) and rescue him from the spore storm. You also kind of get the impression that although they bullied him and asserted their dominance on the regs, they would protect him if other people tried to hurt him. You might say he’s the pet of the gang – he has no power within the structure and it may not be pleasant, but the structure still offers advantages. Having allies was still good for him even if he was at the bottom of the pecking order within the alliance.

Through a sociology lens, you might say the squad (and the Horde in general, given it’s a military society) follows the stereotypical male model of friend groups with clear pecking orders that everyone buys into (with exceptions for blatant power struggles), as opposed to the stereotypical female model that appears less hostile and more cooperative outwardly but involves a lot of underhanded infighting. (Obviously those are broad generalizations and it can be argued how much of it is nature vs. nurture, but they are observable patterns that boys and girls are socialized into in many human societies.) This ties in interestingly to @jaelav3​‘s observations about masculinity equating to strength and femininity equating to power in the Horde (a meta she really needs to write, because it’s brilliant). The hostility of the Horde forces soldiers into these rigid pecking orders in order to find protection in a dangerous place. When everyone knows and accepts their role, it is easier for the squad to function in a unified manner and protect each other, even if it’s at the cost of their mental and emotional health.

Now, when not everybody buys into the pecking order or it’s ambiguous, and/or if there’s a sudden power vacuum, that’s when things get interesting…

Catra and Lonnie, the perfect case study

Catra also suffered a lot of bullying and abuse in the Horde, but in a very different way than Kyle. She was in a unique and kind of contradictory position where she was somewhat protected by her close friendship with Adora, but she was also Shadow Weaver’s favourite chew toy and everyone knew it, which made her a target as well. If Shadow Weaver abused her, she wasn’t going to care if the other cadets abused her as well. Catra’s defensive body language and general distrustfulness and hostility gives the impression that she was bullied behind Adora’s back and Shadow Weaver turned a blind eye, perhaps even encouraged it.

This was all illustrated in 1x03, when Catra and Lonnie butted heads and Catra was forced to back down when two other cadets backed up Lonnie, then Lonnie told her to watch it because Adora wasn’t around to protect her anymore. That one line alone told so much of their story. This was also one of the few times we saw cadets using people from other squads to affect their own squad’s dynamics, as – like I said – that seems to be kept mostly in-house. It may have had something to do with Lonnie’s overall standing among the cadets or how Kyle and Rogelio rank lower in their little hierarchy and seem uninterested in getting involved with the power politics, but I digress.

The argument itself was meaningless, really - the whole thing was a pissing contest, an attempt to assert dominance within their squad’s sudden power vacuum. Lonnie fancied herself the new leader of the squad, and she ended up getting her wish in a backwards way when Catra was promoted out of the squad and given official power over her. Catra, of course, took every opportunity to rub this in Lonnie’s face, perpetuating the cycle of abuse she’d fallen victim to.

The reason they had a power struggle in the first place wasn’t just because Adora left, it was because their pecking order was previously unclear. Catra wasn’t very cooperative and tended to go rogue, so she didn’t slot nicely into the power structure. She was also perceived as lazy, as she had adopted an air of nonchalance once she realized she’d never get the recognition or praise so easily heaped on Adora. (Why try when failing hurts so much?) That being said, she was Adora’s best friend and basically her sidekick, so in a way that made her second-in-command of the squad.

On the other hand, Lonnie was devoted to the squad and was always around to provide tangible support, so she was also kind of Adora’s second-in-command. Combined with her harder work ethic, this also gave her a very legitimate claim to the throne. She was obviously pissed when her teammate she saw as a lazy asshat got promoted, but to her credit she lived up to her own personal ethics, buying in and not pushing back against Catra’s authority until late in season 4.

Despite the power struggle, however, Catra and Lonnie do seem to have a bond. Even if they don’t like each other, they have a certain level of trust in each other. When the princesses invaded the Fright Zone in 3x04 and shit started to go sideways, the first person Catra was looking for to try to get support and/or answers was Lonnie. Then in 4x10 when she was starting to lose her mind amid a lack of sleep and Scorpia’s defection, she pulled Lonnie aside and demanded to know what was going on among the soldiers, what they thought of her.

This was an incredibly interesting scene with some deep implications. Because while it was on one hand an expression of trust in Lonnie, it was also an acknowledgement that Lonnie was one of her bullies and held clout among the people who have demeaned and abused her in the past. It also showed that Catra still has social anxiety and her sense of social power (as opposed to power in terms of rank) is very fragile, which is extremely characteristic of a bullying victim. Also, the fact that Catra said, “Just leave. Like everybody else.” implied that Lonnie leaving would hurt her emotionally, which is rather illuminating.

As for Lonnie, her loyalty meant she bought into the system and expected to Catra to do her job running the place, taking care of the Horde. And Catra certainly succeeded early on, taking territory and increasing productivity. In return, Lonnie was a loyal and obedient soldier, even if she never hesitated to give Catra a bit of attitude. But she became frustrated in season 4 when Catra went on her sunk cost fallacy spiral and ended up making things worse for everyone else as well as herself. This failure was a huge betrayal to Lonnie, and it’s important to note that she wouldn’t feel betrayed or disappointed if she had expected nothing of Catra in the first place. It’s one thing to be kind of a dick about your superior rank, another entirely to endanger your squad/friends (or anyone you are responsible for, really) and run them into the ground as a remedy for your own anxiety.

The breaking point of course was the scene in the locker room in 4x12, when a lonely Catra tried to be “friends” with the squad again and was briefly successful in mending fences a little until she snapped at Kyle and then at Lonnie, calling them pathetic. This prompted Lonnie to shove her, which in turn made Catra bare her claws and rush Lonnie. There was really no coming back from that, even though Kyle intervened before anyone got hurt.

As an aside, Kyle stepping up in this scene was amazing - this season in general was everything I wanted for him. And it’s important that it was him who intervened, because he was really the only one who could ask Catra, “We used to be your friends, why are you treating us like this?” It makes perfect sense for Catra to push back at Lonnie given their history, but Kyle doesn’t have a history of bullying Catra (quite the opposite). And wow, it had an impact on Catra. You could just see the confusion and regret on her face before she brings back the façade of anger and kicks them out.

When the squad left the Horde, Lonnie said that they were done protecting Catra. This assertion is interesting, given their checkered past – since when was anyone protecting Catra? Lonnie bullied her, and none of them protected Catra from Shadow Weaver, not even Adora (though bless her heart, she tried). But this does make some sense when you consider how much of the idea of friendship is based on loyalty, and how important that adherence to the structure is for protection. In Lonnie’s mind, even if Catra was now their commander, they were still a unit in a way. And she saw standing by and obeying Catra to be a form of protection, helping her stay respected and carry out her plans. Lonnie is a good support person, and by removing her support, she was in a way removing her protection as well.

(After the series is over I might just go all out and do a huge-ass meta about Catra and Lonnie through the seasons. I am absolutely fascinated by this relationship, if you can’t tell.)

Allyship

Overall, you can’t help but get the impression that the Horde’s version of friendship is more akin to allyship. It’s protection, unity, loyalty. However, that doesn’t mean they don’t get emotionally attached, it’s more that how you feel about someone is less important than what that relationship can do for you. That’s why Scorpia doesn’t even understand what friendship is. That’s why Catra tolerates “friends” who annoy her, because they’re useful to her (not that she doesn’t get attached in time, but that’s not why she tolerates them in the first place).

Catra’s one of the few people in the Horde who has experienced real friendship, as her bond with Adora was much more emotional than practical (even if it was both). And that explains why she eventually lashed out at Scorpia and said they were not friends when clearly they were by the Horde’s definition. Her and Adora really had taken the friends thing to a different level, and she was missing that dearly.

It will be interesting to watch the interactions between the Horde characters when they are thrown back together in new circumstances, out of the Horde’s rigid power structure. Honestly, the redefining of these alliances and friendships is one of the things I am most looking forward to in the final season.

[askmerriauthor]

Jedi: Fallen Order thoughts 2/?

Discussion on "Star Wars - Jedi: Fallen Order". First post here, spoilers and lengthy rambling after the jump.

Honestly, I love this box art so much purely for the facts that 1) I made sure to remove that poncho the instant I could because the game's cloth dynamic rendering had it flailing about wildly as if it were trying to attack the universe through sheer defiance of physics in every cutscene. And 2) see that alien dude on the left with a pistol? In-game, he's an utter coward who never once participates in anything remotely resembling violence and sure as hell never wields a gun. It just reminds me of how Kirby is always given angry eyebrows in the US because marketing people are fucking stupid and think players won't be drawn to the game with an abjectly cute mascot.

So! The story.

As mentioned in my previous post, "Fallen Order" basically wants to tell a Found Family tale about a ragtag group of remnants who leave behind their previous lives and forge a new future together. We have our main character Cal Kestis; a former Padawan who survived Order 66 and has been in hiding for a handful of years. Cere Junda; a former Jedi who's cut herself off from The Force, Greez Dritus; a gambling addict pilot with a troubled past he's trying to leave behind, and BD-1; an annoyingly named but utterly lovable Droid who is far and away the best character in the entire damn game. There's also Nightsister Merrin; the presumably last survivor of the Nightsisters and potentially Cal's love interest, but she basically only shows up in the last 10 minutes of the game and doesn't get a lot of screentime despite being presented as a major part of the cast.

The game takes place a handful of years after the purge of the Jedi in Order 66, where both Cal and Cere's core character thrust is tied into. Cal was a child who survived only due to his master sacrificing his life to save him and has been wracked with guilt and PTSD ever since. Cere, on the other hand, unintentionally abandoned her own Padawan and other younglings, directly leading to their death, corruption by the Dark Side, and almost falling to the Dark Side herself. The bulk of the narrative throughout the game is dealing with the relationship these two have with one another, coming to terms with their own trauma, and moving forward from there. Meanwhile, the overall plot itself focuses around finding a Holocron that has a map and list of Force-sensitive children throughout the galaxy, which the gang can use to rebuild the Jedi Order while also keeping it - and thus the children - out of The Empire's hands. The whole series of events culminates in a big showdown between Cere's former Padawan whom she abandoned and became corrupted into an Inquisitor, Cal contending with his own guilt, and the decision on whether or not the gang has the right to interfere with the Force-sensitive children's lives and potentially put them in danger if another purge were to occur.

On paper, it's a solid enough story. The actual execution leaves something to be desired.

Something I absolutely hate in games (which has become frustratingly abundant in recent years) is the illusion of choice. If a player is presented with choosing A, B, or C, that decision should matter. Which path is taken should have impact, consequence, and change the course of the story. If all three routes converge back together at the same outcome regardless of what you picked, then your choice never mattered at all. "Fallen Order' suffers from this. There are fairly sporadic points in the game where you're given the option to choose how Cal will reply to a given conversation, or whether or not to take a certain action, but it doesn't matter at all. The conversation's outcome nor the overall story isn't affected by your choice (or even if you bother to have the conversation at all), and the any time you try to do something other than what the game wants you to do, it'll just reset itself endlessly until you cooperate. You have no choice in the matter, but the game makes it appear as if you do to emulate your involvement.

I absolutely hate this in games. If a game presents you with choices, then your choices should have consequences. Your input should matter. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a linear, plot-driven game where the player has no direct input on the narrative. If anything, that gives the story even greater opportunities to shine because it allows the writers and directors to be in full control of the presentation, characterization, and story.

At the risk of sounding like a cranky old man, this is very much a "back in my day!" sort of situation where older games wouldn't shy away from simply locking a player out of content if they chose a certain path. If you pick A, you don't get to see what happens down B or C. If you want to join the Jets, you don't get to join the Sharks. If you want to see what lies down those other routes, then replay the game and make different decisions. Sometimes it was a specific design choice, other times it was a way to handle hardware/programming restrictions. But there's a big notion these days in particular where there's a desire to make sure the player sees all the game's content up front. I anecdotally chalk it up to an increase in non-gamers entering into video game development at management level and making design decisions they're not qualified for, but that's just my own take. Like, I understand the thought process behind it. "We have all this content, so we want to make it a selling point and ensure the player gets to see all of it! If they play our game and miss a bunch of stuff, they might bitch at us and cause reviews". I get it, I do. But it's also bullshit because it directly harms the final product. If a game is good, players will replay it ad nauseum for ages beyond release. So they're going to see all the content one way or another. When the "we have to let the player access all content up front" mind set is in effect, it means the player's choices ultimately don't matter and the resulting abundance of content is quantity rather than quality.

In the case of "Fallen Order", your choices don't matter one bit and it's not even out of a case of accessing content. For some reason the developers put in this vestigial, pointless façade of a dialogue tree and choice system when the game frankly would've been far stronger if it had just been left out entirely. Developers have to invest one way or another. Either make it a fully narrative-driven game and tell a solid story, or make it a player-driven game and put in the effort to make the player's choices matter. Especially in a Star Wars game, as RPGs in this franchise have historically have Light/Dark Side choices, character deaths, and alternate endings based on your decisions. A big part of "Fallen Order"'s story is characters contending with the risk of falling to the Dark Side because of their trauma, but the game itself never actually gives the player any chance to explore that at all. It's a huge missed opportunity either way.

I think that's where a lot of the story's trouble comes from in the end. It's a lot of build up on a good idea that fizzles out and goes nowhere. Cal spends the entire game getting to a point where he's ready to move on, and then the game ends. Cere comes to terms with her past mistakes and tries to redeem her fallen Padawan, only for said fallen Padawan to be killed abruptly and completely cut off that entire story thread. Greez's past coming back to haunt him is shoe-horned in randomly and never goes anywhere. Merrin doesn't have enough time on screen to matter. There are three major villains throughout the game who are just cast aside casually and with no lingering impact for ever having been there. The biggest final boss, who has been the core antagonist and a major point of emotional conflict for the entire game, is discarded with no resolution because this is a Star Wars game and we just can't have one that doesn't feature Darth Vader sweeping in to steal the spotlight.

It's just... ugh. There's potential here. There's obvious, glowing moments of potential where things could've been developed into something really impressive if they were just given the opportunity. It feels like a huge waste and the end result is just a "meh" game that doesn't go anywhere, doesn't contribute to the setting, and could very easily be dismissed entirely from the franchise with absolutely no impact.

[backslashdelta]

Becky my beloved <3

how are you?

I will be asking to rank all Kurt ships you can think with as much of an explanation as you want ✍️

hope your day is going well 🧡

Myle my beloved <3

I'm not too bad! Kinda stressed over work this week, but it could be worse. I hope you're well!

I don't have a ton of energy to go all out with explanations (I wrote this and then gave an explanation with every single one but shhhh). In lieu of the amount of detail I'd like to provide, please accept these links to previous things I've posted about my opinions of Kurt ships:

Kartie/Kody, Puckurt/St Hummel/Chummel, Kelliott/Kadam/Hevans/Kandler/Kalter, top 10 (now outdated)

I also once posted a tier list of my Kurt ships so feel free to take a look at that! It also may or may not have changed since. My top 3-4 are pretty solid, and after that things can vary quite a bit based on how I'm feeling at the moment.

I'm going to limit this post to pairs rather than poly ships because then there would just be far too many combinations...

ANYWAY. Ranked list of Kurt ships under the cut :)

Kurtbastian. I don't think I need to explain myself, but this dynamic is absolutely everything to me. The intensity, the drama, the sexual tension, everything they are is just so so so perfect for each other and I love them.

Kelliott. I love Kurtbastian because they're a great story, but I love Kelliott because they feel real. If Kurt Hummel were a real actual person, I would want him to be with Elliott Gilbert.

Klaine. The ship that got me into fanfic. That being said... I think I love them more for the fandom than for their canon relationship at this point. Which is totally fine, since basically all of the ships I love are due to fandom if not my own personal thoughts on the characters involved <3

Puckurt. Pansexual!Noah Puckerman in love with Kurt Hummel and willing to defend his honour? Not giving a shit what people have to say about him because He Loves Kurt and he won't be ashamed of who he is and he's just So! Proud! Of his boyfriend!! And Kurt just rolls his eyes and tells Puck he can take care of himself and Puck just looks at him and smirks and says "I know you can" and then they're making out against a wall in a locker room and... I'm gonna stop before I get carried away, but. Yeah. Puckurt my beloved.

Kadam. I'm sometimes guilty of forgetting about them and I'm so mad every single time because they are so cute!! So good!!! Like PLEASE ADAM IS A SWEETHEART and Glee did us so dirty by not giving this relationship a real chance.

Wert. Wesley Montgomery needs to be defended at all costs. This is based solely on fanfiction, and most of that is my own fanfiction lol I accidentally wrote myself into shipping them and now I can't stop.

St Hummel. This would be the most chaotic relationship imaginable but oh god would it be funny as hell.

Hevans. They are very very sweet and the fact that Sam wasn't bi is a crime. Sam clearly had such a high opinion of Kurt throughout the entire damn show, and they should have been together.

Chummel. Mike is a sweetheart. I'm having visions of very hands-on dance lessons that very quickly veer into not-quite-dance-lessons-anymore because Mike is getting right up in Kurt's space to help him move and... well, you get the idea.

Brokurt. Brody deserved better then the show gave him. And he's also so clearly not entirely straight. Let him have a fling with Kurt PLEASE.

Kartie. They would be sweet. I'm not a HUGE fan of Artie but I do think he could be a good boyfriend, and I could imagine him and Kurt being really supportive of each other and their talents being very complimentary.

Kandler. I don't think this would work long term, but I think Chandler is such a fun character and it would have been neat to see where this could go. Maybe a fun little summer fling to boost Kurt's confidence, you know? They part on good terms, go their own ways for school at the end of the summer, if they ever run into each other back home they're friendly and give each other a hug.

Kurtofsky. I'll be honest; I used to really hate this ship. I don't hate it anymore though. In canon? Ehhh, still don't really see it ever happening. Fanon, however, I could see it. And the art that I've seen is gorgeous. I could see this moving up over time; the more I think about it, the more it grows on me tbh.

Kalter. I actually don't hate this. Don't love that Walter lied on the app, but he was upfront on their first date. And I don't think he was taking advantage of Kurt, and the age difference doesn't really bother me (it's not idea especially considering Kurt was still not that long out of high school at this point, but given it's television and he was made out to seem older I can let it slide). I think this was a fine little short relationship and neither of them were all that invested in it, but I don't like... actively enjoy it or anything haha.

Kooper. Honestly the level of awe/obsession/whatever that Kurt had for Cooper upon meeting him turns me off this ship a little bit. I don't hate it or anything, I just don't really see it. Absolutely give me brother-in-laws Kooper ganging up to tease Blaine, though!

Kody. I am very much pro slutty Kurt trying to get it on with a sexy man, but I just... this particular man gives me the heebie jeebies, you know? It's just Not It for me, sorry.

Kinn. No hate to anybody who does like this ship, and like I get it, but a) they're canonically brothers and even in a verse where they aren't I still can't put that aside, and b) I don't really like Finn as a character do I don't enjoy thinking about him and Kurt together romantically. I can enjoy some fanon brotherly Furt content, but that's about all. My apologies.

[angelmichelangelo]

i’m about five years too late and nobody asked for this except me and i need to just get this out of my brain because it’s 2am so here’s a list of things i wish happened on glee that didn’t HERE WE GO:

- new directions being actual teenagers. just them hanging out. going to group sleepovers. giant study sessions (because school exists in this universe?) like remember in tpp when they were eating lunch together ? that’s what i wanted MORE of. just them being actual friends. a sleepover episode is all i wanted imagine all the abba songs we could have gained from that episode

- a halloween themed episode. the closest to this that we got was the ‘thriller/heads will roll’ mashup which YES was iconic but im greedy and it’s not enough. my idea for a halloween episode is that the gang gets trapped inside the school after staying behind to idk rehearse? or something? and then things get progressively worse as they start to go a little mad, thinking the school is haunted and they split up into pairs trying to find an escape and they think they’re seeing ghosts/someone lurking around the school and they’re getting real spooked but it turns out it’s just sue fucking with them lmao

- kurt and finn being brothers. THE POTENTIAL WAS THERE and sadly after furt we are left with crumbs. why ?? WHY?? little moments like finn saying that he’s driving back home with kurt or them saying they can’t do something because they have a family thing would have been good enough. more scenes of them hanging out in their home with their parents would have been *chefs kiss* but alas. it never happened because glee writers are bastards

- based off my last point: sam actually living at the hudson-hummel house because he actually did live there? but nothing is ever said like what’s the dynamic there why weren’t kurt and sam and finn close if they all lived together for what? like a year? was sam living in the mf shed? did he ever get close to carole and burt?? where tf did he live when everyone went off to college did he just stay in their house lol who knows not me LMAO

- blaine dealing with his trauma ? mental health was never dealt with very well on this show. emma’s ocd was just ignored after she got married or whatever and blaine mentioned his trauma once and then it was ignored until it was mentioned in passing a few seasons later and even he just brushed it off and it was never brought up again like wtf. i have no idea how they wrote a whole episode about hate crime in bash and they never once thought to have blaine and kurt have a single conversation together, let alone a conversation about how they’d both been victims of a hate crime. AND THE ONLY TIME BLAINE DOES MENTION IT IS IN TESTED WHERE ITS JUST USED AS A REASON FOR THEM TO FIGHT AAAAAAAA no wait im calm it’s okay. i just would have liked to have seen kurt and blaine have an emotional moment together in that episode that didn’t include blaine singing and kurt being knocked tf out. just sayin.

- kurt dealing with HIS trauma !! again, glee gets bad points for talking about mental health and it just is crazy that they had so much potential with kurt, ie: depression, anxiety, ocd (kinda?) his bullying, being literally assaulted (i see u ryan murphy taking that whole plot line so loosely mmhm) and then shoehorning in the fact that he was suicidal AT THE SECOND TO LAST EPISODE when they had a whole episode about suicide and they could have mentioned it at any time but ofc they didn’t because the writers just wanted to shove in as much as they could in the flashback episode AYE AYE AYE the potential!!!! oof.

- literally just more tina. jenna ushkowitz is a fantastic actor/singer/preformer and she was criminally underused. i like the episode props because of two reasons: one. everyone switching characters was amazing. and two. some actual tina scenes. even if she.. technically was rachel but also herself or something? either way. i digress

- this is just in general but MORE ABBA AND ALSO THE CARPENTERS and also some sound of music songs would have worked GREAT but they already had like a million songs and as the show progressed they veered away from old songs and more towards popular songs at the time to help chart numbers blah blah blah whatever it’s cool. but also how did they only do a few abba songs that is criminal

- a more fleshed out ending that wasn’t so rushed. like rachel won a tony and everyone else is just? there? why is sam at mr shue’s house ??? how did artie get up the stairs? did quinn graduate from yale? and where tf was kurt and blaine’s child during ‘i lived’ because burt and carole are vibing in the audience and rachel isn’t pregnant so like? is the baby just?? alone somewhere in the wings?! lmao where are u bby girl!! but once again i know they didn’t have the time to do it so idk it’s fine what they did it just sucks we didn’t get more! but again. fanfic exists so yah im all good

- more of blaine’s mum. or mom, in this case i guess. why cast gina gershon and then give her ONE line like ? ik there was a whole deleted script that explained why she was there but i love that up until that point blaine seemed like he genuinely murdered his parents, lived in their big house all alone and when people got suspicious he just told them that they were “out of town” :) either way pam is great i love her and i wish she had more to do in the one episode she was ever in. not even a moment with blaine?? wasted.

- more of cooper anderson, matt boomer is so fucking funny everytime i think of the emotion tornado i bust a lung laughing like it’s so fucking stupid but oh my good i love it. (and if you haven’t watched the special feature of cooper’s transformers audition tape please please watch it because it’s just so funny.) ik he was just a special guest but i wish they got him back for at least the wedding ep but guess my mans was just busy. boo ;(

- going back a couple of points, i wish they’d done a whole episode like props. every actor here just shines when they’re impersonating each other. finn and puck as kurt and blaine is beautiful and quinn and sugar is incredible. also idk why they refused kevin the right to wear the cheerios skirt; they could have put a little more effort into some characters but that’s glee for ya lmao but yeah. a whole episode like that would have been so much fun

- they should have let chris colfer write more episodes. purely for the fact that he wrote with his own bare hands the whole scene where lea michelle’s character gets dragged down a road by dogs. this guy. it’s a shame he only got to write one since he actually did a really good job! i would have loved to have seen what other episode ideas he had :)

- glee in the summer! obviously it only was centred around the school year but after season 3 who honestly gave a shit about the glee club and mckinley lmao i wanna see them in SHORT SHORTS and POOL PARTIES but nope we just got september - june so like rip all my hopes and dreams

- WHAT HAPPENED TO DALTON? bitch just burst into flames ?? and for WHAT?? oh yeah plot convenience smh this is so sad i wish they’d either written something better than “we need the warblers to team up with new directions so uhhh the school burnt down” like. it’s a private school. if the school is gone and they’re just staying at mckinley what are the parents paying for? they’re just cool with sending their kids off to public school now? every adult in this universe has been murdered by these kids, haven’t they? they’re just doing whatever they want jfc

- a wedding was a good episode. ish. and yknow, huge kudos to them because gay marriage wasn’t legal in the us at the time so im less harsh on the fact that they definitely threw up the rainbow flags and made it less about the characters getting married and more so “we have gay characters and look they’re getting married what a concept” but i do wish we could have gotten some more married!klaine since they don’t really have much to do after this understandably but a little moment alone together after the wedding would have been nice :) IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE IM TELLING YOU

- get rid of the hummelberry friendship and send mercedes to new york instead. i have nothing else to add to this other than the fact that i mourn the fact that kurt and mercedes went from bffs to just. school mates. this is tragic this is traaaaagic !! and all for more of the rachel berry show smh

- every day i wonder what was going through carmen tibideaux mind when she watched the kurt hummel preform not the boy next door and was like :) and then watched rachel berry have a breakdown on stage and then proceeded to give rachel the spot at nyada and kurt gets payed literal dust. and THEN she had the nerve to tell him it was because his performance had no heart. AND HOW DID ADAM GET IN THIS BABY GOT BACK MOTHERFUCKER?! nyada is a circus school oh my god !!!!! kurt deserved better im telling yall he deserved so much better

there’s so much more i could rant about but im going insane im so tired and i need psychological help after watching glee so im gonna leave it here and say peace out homies it’s been fun but i need to sleep so bad

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Max and Eugene in Peril on the High Seas

So we have another obligatory animal focused episode. This one fairs much better than Max’s Enemy and King Pascal; but it’s still ultimately useless filler. 

Summary: Rapunzel and the group are finally leaving Tirapai Island when the cargo ferry arrives, but Eugene and Maximus get into an argument, resulting in them falling overboard. They manage to save themselves on a passing ship, but discover it to be a prison ship where all the criminals, including the Stabbington Brothers, Lady Caine and Axel have escaped and taken control. Eugene and Maximus attempt to escape, but discover the villains' plot to ambush the cargo ferry and set out to stop them. Meanwhile, Rapunzel and the group discover Eugene and Maximus are missing and set out to rescue them.

There’s No Ticking Clock In Season Two and That’s to the Series’s Detriment 

So we’re finally leaving the island and this bit of dialogue tells us that they were on said island for at least six weeks. Which matters not in the slightest in the grand scheme of things; which is the problem. 

In addition to there being no outside threat forcing Rapunzel on this journey, there’s also nothing that’s forcing her to hurry up. So we’re doubly lacking in tension. There are no stakes in season two so things feel over long, and arcs that have the heroes stay in one place for more than two episodes at time stop the momentum of the series dead; leading to tedium for the viewers. 

We Didn’t Need King Pascal Just to Set Up the Firefly

The firefly is one of the few elements in the show that has proper set up and resolve. It’s established as the threat in one episode and then used as the solution in this episode. However both episodes are utterly useless in the over all arc so, while clever, it’s a wasted idea. It’s also unneeded since this intro exposition re-explains what the firefly is and what it’s deal is in case people missed out on King Pascal anyways. 

The Reason Why this Max Focus Episode Works, but Not Max’s Enemy, is Because It’s a Double Act

The problem with the mandated animal themed episodes every season is that Max and Pascal aren’t strong enough characters to work by themselves. They’re sidekicks; they’re designed to play off other characters. The writers seemed to clue in on this by making this episode and Max’s episode in season three, team up episodes. So now today’s episode becomes a Eugene focused episode too. Which in turn allows for their character dynamic to be fleshed out more. 

We needed more interesting combinations of the mains in episodes like this one in order for the group to feel like a group. We also desperately needed to do something similar for Pascal instead of just rehashing the same plot for him over and over again. 

This Plot Point Makes No Sense

When I first saw this episode, I thought it was foreshadowing later developments for season three, seeing how it’s one of the few episodes in season two that connects back to season one. However, once you know the events of season three, this episode no longer makes logical sense within the greater narrative. 

For you see, Andrew and Varian have teamed up to take over Corona at the beginning of season three. Yet that begs the question of why didn’t Frederic ship them away on the prison barge as well. Varian you might could excuse being missing here given his age, but Andrew? There’s no reason to keep Andrew around; none that is given on screen anyways. 

Also this mutiny couldn’t have taken place after the Saporian take over either. For starters all the guards retreated from Corona entirely when it became evident that the Saporians were in charge. That’s a stated plot point in Rapunzel’s Return to explain why Cap is missing. There wouldn’t have been a need for a mutiny if Andrew just let all the criminals go and there’d be no reason why Andrew would send them away using his own guards. The Saporians are small in numbers and that would be a waste of manpower. 

Also, because the Saporians are outnumbered, it doesn’t make sense to send away potential allies. Lady Caine has more logical motivation to join Andrew in his take over than Varian does. She just wants revenge on Frederic and riches. She cares nothing about ruling a kingdom and holds no qualms about hurting others; so she’d be the perfect partner for Andrew’s plans. Add in the fact that she has a whole gang/small army of criminals under her command, and she could have brought along some much needed manpower. 

Lady Caine is Wasted!!!

Speaking of Lady Caine, this is her final appearance in the show. Introduced in the pilot as an important character, yet given only three episodes and shoved out of the picture before the final season. And they didn’t even bother to bring up her original motivations or goals in any of her return appearances. 

Chris mentioned in interviews about how he wanted to ‘defy audience perception’ and so pulled a bunch of bait and switches in the writing; but this isn’t that. This is just straight up lazy writing. There’s nothing clever about introducing a character as being important and then not using them. It’s a frustrating waste of time and a waste of a concept; not a surprising ‘gotcha’ for the audience. 

Proper set up and resolve exists in storytelling in order to get your audience invested in what is happening and then give them a satisfying pay out for their continued involvement. Modern television writers have gotten so caught up in ‘shocking’ twists that they forgot the importance of giving satisfying endings to their audience. Because if the audience isn’t satisfied they will walk away. Hooks alone are not enough to keep them around as evidenced by the series ratings drop. 

Also, Why is Weasel Here?

I once suggested that this episode would make more sense if Max’s Enemy came before One Angry Princess in season one. Implying that Caine and the gang were sent away before Andrew’s arrest. This idea flies out the window with Anthony the Weasel here. He was last seen running away at the end of The Return of Quaid. How the hell did he wind up here? 

He had to have been arrested, put on trial, and then shipped away with the other criminals in between TRoQ and PotHS. Which just raises a whole bunch of other questions.   

How much time has passed between then and now?

What did Weasel do to get caught in Corona?

Why did it take so long to ship Caine and her gang out when it was just a matter of days for Attila to be banished? 

Why wasn’t she put on that same barge Attila was going to be put on?

If there was enough time to ship Attila and the Weasel out then there was plenty of time to ship Andrew and Varian, so why are they still in Corona?

Why is there even a prison barge to begin with? Are they just that stripped for room and man power in Corona’s dungeons?

Where does the prison barge actually go to? Does Corona own a prison island or do they have a deal with another kingdom? What is the world building behind this plot point? 

Also where the heck did Dwayne go? 

You Need Villains 

In the end it doesn’t matter. This is just a lame excuse to get rid of all of the season one villians besides the Stabbingtons. Which only stick around because they’re movie originals and need to reappear and be redeemed before the wedding short; otherwise they’d be gone too. 

Which is the dumbest idea ever! Season two and even the first half of season three is devoid of any main antagonists so why are we getting rid of anyone who could potentially fulfill that role? Who’s stupid idea was this? What were they smoking? This goes against basic writing 101. There’s no story if there’s no conflict! 

Eugene Has a Point

Like there are reasons why law enforcement aren’t on call 24/7 and there are also reasons why different territories have different jurisdictions. Not complying to that undermines law and order, not upholds it.

If a police officer from the US could arrest people while on vacation in Spain, it’d be a political nightmare. Even extrication of wanted criminals who seek refuge in other countries requires permission and cooperation from those countries governments or you’d be violating international law; which potentially could be seen as an act of war. 

Also you would still send in people who are actually on duty. Right now there are protests in my country regarding the lack of accountability police officers have. Plenty of cops break the law both on and off duty because they know they can get away with because of the nepotism within the force.  Max pulling out a guide book that essentially gives Corona’s guards permission to ‘enact justice as they see fit’ while even off duty is clear case of an abuse of power, and futhers the narrative that Corona is a dictatorship/police state that persecutes it’s most vulnerable citizens. 

The fact that the narrative then rewards this line of thought by placing Max in the right on this is just another check off in the long list of promoting authoritarian beliefs that this series teaches. People with power are held to different standards then those without. That’s just a fact of life. Having Eugene or Max acknowledge that this does break the law but is still right thing to do would be far better message and give the characters more complexity. 

Who gets to decide what is ‘bad’ here? What is this ‘something’ they are meant to do? This rule is a gateway for corruption because it’s not clearly defined and relies too heavily on the idea that guards are naturally ‘honorable’ and good and not, you know, people. 

There’s a saying in law school. Nothing is simple and fair. If it’s simple then it’s not fair; and if it's fair then its not simple. 

Laws are complex because life is complex, people are complex, and not everything applies the same way because situations are different. That’s why we have courts. And yes, sometimes there’s too much discrepancy in sentences, leading to some people being harshly over punished while others get away with little more than a slap on the hand; but having things the other way around would still cause such discrepancy as not everyone’s experiences are equal to begin with. 

And before you say I’m reading too much into a kids show, this is a conflict that the episode itself has decided to introduce. If you wanted a simple message about doing the right thing than ‘the law’ should not have been brought up at all. Because laws are not simple, they are not universal, and they are not infallible. If the writers thought this idea too complex for their audience then they shouldn’t have introduced the idea. 

It's better to not bring up deeper subject matter at all than to introduce it and then not address it properly.  

Oh, and We Get Confirmation that Corona Speaks English, for Some Reason... 

This was also hinted at this in the supplement book, My First Year As A Princess; which was suppose to replica of Rapunzel’s Diary in the show, though it’s sverealy been paired down from the original concept. 

Anyways, it’s pretty much canon that everyone is indeed speaking English on screen, even though there’s no logical reason for this. Chalk it up to yet more lazy world building. 

Corona is never hinted to being a replacement for England itself. The few hints we get to it’s placement on the world map suggests it’s on the main continent of Europe and is a peninsula. Other real world languages like, French, Italian, and German are confirmed to exist, with Italy at least being a real location in this world. 

Also we spend this whole season traveling to other kingdoms. So why would everyone speak English? This is before British and American imperialism, and before the internet, so English wouldn’t be a default secondary language for the many countries that it is today. So how does this work? 

Once again, if traveling the world is a big plot point of your story then you need to determinate where and how your main protagonist fits into that world. If they’re a princess of a kingdom then we need to know where that kingdom is in relation to the surrounding places we visit or discuss.  

Axel is Still Useless

Max didn’t need a rival. This character adds nothing to the over all story and is one villain/character too many in an already overstuffed series. I don’t mind the idea of pairing down some of the minions and other background characters. I just take issue with getting rid of all of the villains. Particularly interesting ones that could have done more, like Weasel or Lady Caine. 

The Very Existence of Lady Caine Undermines Both Rapunzel’s and Cassandra’s Arcs

So the series wants to present this idea that Rapunzel is compassionate and is all about giving second chances, yet Caine, one of the most sympathetic villains in the show next to Varian, is given zero chance at all. The show is too busy trying to make Rapunzel look ‘bad ass’ by easily taking down an seemingly equal badass female villain, that doesn’t stop to think about the implications of this conflict. 

The series fails because the only people Rapunzel redeems are people that she needs something from. She needs Styalan to gain the Eye of Pincosta. She needs Varian to help defeat the Saporians and ease her bruised ego. She needs Cassandra because she’s her best friend and it hurts her personally for them to no longer be friends. None of the redemptions in the show are actually about the characters who are redeeming themselves, it’s about their effect on Rapunzel’s personal life. 

But placing Rapunzel’s personal feelings above what other characters actually need is the opposite of compassion. It’s selfishness. It doesn’t make Rapunzel the focus of the story it just makes her look like an ass. 

Moreover Lady Caine’s arc is directly tied to Corona’s corrupt legal system. Rapunzel can’t be this purveyor of change if she and the show never acknowledges why the system must change to begin with. 

Last off, Cassandra’s arc is then diminished by the existence of more sympathetic villains like Caine and Varian. They have more reason to do the things they do, and their actions connect back to their goals. Cass doing worst things for less reason, and then getting away with less punishment than them, is a slap in the face to the viewers. It turns her from a likeable character to an unbearable twat, and makes her later redemption a product of nepotism rather than act of agency on her part. 

Everyone is ill served by writing Caine out and not giving her a conclusion to her personal conflict. Rapunzel, Cassandra, Frederic, and Lady Caine herself are all denied a chance to grow as characters and that’s infuriating to watch. 

Also Yes, This Episode was a Big Missed Opportunity to Add Urgency to the Plot

As previously mentioned, season two needed an ongoing external conflict. Anyone of the villains on the ship could have been the main antagonist of the second half of the season. Just have the person in question escape in the confusion, or overthrow the new crew of the ship a second time. Then have them show up later looking for a fight. 

My money is on Lady Caine, but the Stabbingtons or Weasel could have done just a well. Caine wants revenge on Rapunzel. The Stabbingtons are after Eugene. Weasel wants power and riches, so capturing the princess and holding her for ransom could have been a goal. Then have them learn about this hidden power then voila you gotta a set up for a race to the end of the quest.  

You also could just picked an underling at random and then elevated them to main villain by giving them a good goal and a backstory. 

Also finally, Andrew and/or Varian, we’re options that they could have added in here. Varian more so than anybody else as he already has reason to go after the moonstone because his father. 

Heck, you still could have added Varian and not made him the villain if you didn’t want to. This could have been the start of his redemption arc instead, and one of the previously mentioned villains,a Brotherhood member, or one of Zhan Tiri’s Disciples could have still served as the main antagonist. 

In short, most of the problems with Tangled’s story are really easy fixes and the writers had multiple options at their disposal that they didn’t take. Which is just further evidence to last minute rewrites and Chris and Ben’s missamangment. 

Conclusion    

I enjoy this episode because it’s one of the few to tie back into season one, but it’s is a missed opportunity and it is a shame that it went nowhere. 

[tangentiallly]

last night i rewatched the lupin iii and conan crossovers for idk the 5th or 6th time, it’s been years since i first watched them and i’m still quite fond tbh. like is the plot good? probably not. but the action scenes are fun (and while conan manga/anime isn’t about action, more recent conan movies are very very action lmao it’s becoming a formula i miss phantom of baker street but that’s not the point here). action scenes are fun and the character dynamics are good but also if not for these two specials introducing me to lupin iii i would never have known it - i grew up with conan and so does everyone around me, it’s on television the movies came to big screens every summer, my classmates all knew it and even my mom, it’s just a very ever present thing, but i didn’t grow up with lupin and i had never watched it until the crossover so i’d always be glad that the crossovers introduced me to it.

and also i love seeing the world view / world building differences between the two franchises during rewatch and i think one scene that always stuck in my mind was when conan tried to save that guy on the plane but couldn’t and lupin told him to let go. i know due to conan being a child friendly manga and also the main character’s philosophy and views that aoyama emphasized, the “good” characters don’t kill people and always try their best to save others in the show. (the moonlight sonata case also solidified shinichi’s belief.) so in that scene you can see conan’s world view and lupin’s and the difference between them - there was previously an argument between them where lupin said they could’ve just let their two enemies fight each other and take each other out, but conan’s the type to orchestrate things to make sure nobody gets hurt. and then conan tried to save that villain but had to let go because he couldn’t keep holding onto him without falling over himself. lupin told him that’s the man’s fate.

and i think it’s noticeable that aoyama never had the “good guys” / people on conan’s side actually kill anyone - like in m22 furuya actually just faked the man’s death, and how akai didn’t actually kill scotch. like yes due to the nature of this show there would always be murderers, but conan’s allies and friends were never shown to do so and it’s intentional. like while it’s possible, even likely, that bourbon or rye or kir have actually killed during their undercover missions, but the viewers won’t get that on screen or even any concrete event of that, due to the nature of this show.) (there was a moment in m22 i thought that maybe they’re going to reveal that furuya had only used technology to create the illusion that that guy was still alive, to get cooperation, and the fake death thing might have been a lie, but i’m not surprised it didn’t turn out that way because honestly it would’ve been too dark and while a lot of adults still watch conan because we grew up watching conan, its still a kids cartoon.) (unlike lupin which the target demographic is adults. personally i think the intended target demographic, at least the earlier parts, is specifically cishet men but that’s not the point here.)

it’s really fun crossover for me not because of the plot but because of the exploration of how different characters with different world views interact with each other and how to balance two sets of characters created out of two different fictional universes which live by different rules (by rules i mostly mean like, physical, scientific ones lol, i know some conan actions are unrealistic esp the those skateboard scenes but goemon’s skills are on a different level tbh), i think that’s just very fun. i’ve seen some people said that if lupin gang help conan take down BO then that’ll just take one movie and while that’s definitely true but also that’s why crossover parallel universes are a separate universe and i like keeping it that way (canon wise i meant. fanfic wise im definitely up to reading this concept but i think in canon some things should be keep separated.)

all in all im just really glad aoyama is a lupin iii fan (and even created vermouth’s and yukiko’s characters based on fujiko) and the crossovers happened. i really like lupin and partly because it’s an anime about adult characters targeting at adult audience partly because found family trope who committed crimes. both franchises are nostalgic for me but conan’s the kind of nostalgia for my childhood since i grew up with it but lupin’s the kind of nostalgia for like, 70s and 80s (part 2 and part 3 are so good). anyway im just rambling here.

[verai-marcel]

Better Than a Dream (RDR2 Fanfic, Arthur x Fem!Reader, 18+)

Summary: It's 1895. You've been with the Van der Linde gang for 12 years, about the same time as John. Arthur has been your most trusted friend all this time, and you've watched him pursue other women while suppressing your own feelings, complicated by his alpha scent and your omega heats. Will you ever confess to Arthur that your love is true and comes from the heart? 

Author’s Notes: A gift for my dear @jezzeee, you gave me so much backstory and answered all my questions, thanks for your cooperation!

Tags: A/B/O dynamics with my own twist, high honor Arthur, fast forward slow burn, pre-rdr2, smut, rough sex, biting, marking, doggy style (heh)

Word Count: 4164

AO3 Link is over here, darlin’.

--------------------

You didn't dream often. When you did, it was always of the past. 

Tonight, the dream started the same. Your pa, lying on the ground, blood everywhere. You, fleeing town after running home and grabbing what you could, knowing that your pa's killers wouldn't show you any mercy. 

Months of working as a hired gun, another body, another dollar. Too many close calls to count. You should've been dead. 

Then you ran into Hosea, who saw your skills, and offered you a home. 

Dutch van der Linde was a charismatic man, leading a small gang in the pursuit of freedom and riches. At first it was just Hosea, Dutch, Arthur, and John, another new kid. Soon after, Susan & Tilly joined. People came, left, died, or were killed, but the core group became your new family. 

You were a frustrated and scared fifteen year old trying to survive in a brutal world. After getting to know everyone, you relaxed, and began to trust.

But when you presented as an omega two years after joining the gang, you panicked; would everyone treat you differently? Would you be kicked out for being a liability, a weakness? 

You need not have worried. The moment you went into your first heat, and for every time afterwards, Susan became a tigress, whisking you away to a cabin or safe house somewhere and taking care of you until it was over, making sure no alpha would dare to come near you. She comforted you, told you that no one would drive you away, that you were family.  

When she and you returned to camp after three days, everyone still treated you the same; that was the true sign of a good family. Sure, they kept an eye on you to make sure you were never alone when your heat approached, but for the most part, they trusted you to take care of yourself. You had proven yourself time and time again to be capable, resourceful, and resilient. 

Over the years, the core group became the most important people in your life; you’d do anything for the gang.

But it was Arthur who earned your trust the most. Capable, calm, and reliable, he was your first choice if you needed a partner on a job. 

He was twenty when you first met him. At first he kept you at arm's length, treating you like the obnoxious kid sister he never wanted while he ran off courting Mary. As that relationship fell apart, he found himself coming to talk to you about his thoughts, his troubles. You always listened and gave him perspective without judgement, and he grew to appreciate your straightforward analysis. 

You noticed he always fled when your heats came, as if he couldn’t stand the sight of you when you were weak and needy. As the years passed and you grew older, you downplayed any injury, any emotional weakness, trying to be stronger, strong enough to be accepted by Arthur. As your trust in him became love, you realized that he’d never love you back, not the way you wanted him to. He loved you, sure, but it was clearly as family.

You watched as Mary broke his heart. You watched as he met Eliza, had Isaac, and had his heart torn out when he lost them both. 

Nowadays, there was a wall around him; he still cared, but he didn’t show it as much as he used to. Behind a sardonic smile and biting remarks, Arthur was growing bitter, even though he was still playful at times, if you could cheer him up enough.

Usually the last thing you saw in your dreams was Arthur walking away from you, and as you ran to chase him, you'd wake up, your blankets tangled around your legs. 

But not this time. This time, when you called out his name, he turned to you. His smile lit up his face, and he held his arms out to you, saying your name softly, like a lover's caress. You leapt into his arms… 

And promptly rolled off your bed. 

You sat up, shook the cobwebs out of your mind, and slowly got up. 

"You alright in there?" Arthur's muffled voice floated through the door. 

"I'm fine."

"Can I come in?" 

"Sure."

Arthur opened the adjoining door between your rooms at the hotel, only to immediately turn his back on you. 

"Jesus, warn me if yer just in your sleepin' clothes."

You shrugged. "You've seen me in this growing up, what difference does it make now?" 

Arthur waved his hand dismissively at you. "Yer all…" He gestured wildly. "Jus’ put yerself back together, then we'll talk."

He scurried back through the connecting door and shut it softly. 

You were a bit stunned at his hasty exit. Back at camp, he didn't give two shits what you had on, he'd wake you up by tossing your satchel at you so you'd get ready faster. 

Finally you glanced down at your cap sleeve nightgown and noticed one of your sleeves had slipped off your shoulder and down your arm, and the gown had hiked up to your thighs, revealing more of your skin than normal. Sighing, you worked on getting up and throwing on your shirt and work pants. You tried to ignore the heat blooming in your cheeks. How much did Arthur see? Did he peek at the swell of your cleavage while it was exposed? Did his gaze linger on your bare legs? 

God, you wanted him to lust after you. Then the pining you felt wouldn't be so one sided. And it wasn't just a physical attraction; that had come later, after you had grown to trust Arthur unconditionally. He had helped you out so many times without saying a word, and you always repaid the favor. You didn't take him for granted, like a lot of other folk in the gang, and you always made sure he knew how much you appreciated him. 

Which is why, for this simple train job, you opted to take Arthur. John offered to come with as back-up, but you knew it was because he wanted a piece of the take.

When you were finally dressed and ready to go, you knocked on the adjoining door.

“C’mon in.”

You let yourself into his room, where he was sitting on the bed, putting his journal away into his satchel.

“You ready?”

“Sure,” you answered, “but I could use some coffee.”

Arthur observed you for a moment. “Same dream?”

You nodded, giving yourself a moment to compose yourself before spitting out a lie. “Yeah, same dream.” You didn’t want to tell him that the ending was different than before.

He raised an eyebrow at you. But after a moment, he let it go. Getting up, he held the door open as you exited the hotel room, leading you outside and back to your horses.

“We’ll make some coffee when we get to the overlook,” Arthur said over his shoulder as he pulled himself up onto his horse.

“Alright,” you said, getting onto your horse and following him out of town.

***

The two of you rode half the day to the top of a cliff that overlooked the tunnel where the train would come from tonight.

“Wondered when the two of you would show up,” came a scratchy voice behind a large boulder.

“Shut up Marston. We’re here, ain’t we?” you shot back.

John laughed. “Full of spit and vinegar, as always. Why’d you hafta bring the old man? We coulda done this on our own.”

You glanced at Arthur before responding. “You know we need him. Hafta make up for your dumb ass.”

Arthur laughed as he walked to John and clapped his shoulder. “You heard the lady. Her job, her rules.”

***

Waiting until nightfall, the three of you made some coffee and shared stories, talking about the old days, when it was only the five of you.

When you heard the train whistle in the far off distance, you got up and stretched.

“Well boys, it’s time we earned our keep.”

The three of you got up on your horses, both of the men turning serious as they followed you to the ambush point. The plan was simple: hop onto the train from a low hanging rock outcropping, rob as many people as possible, and hop off. 

As you reached the ambush location, you scouted out a good spot to wait. Taking a deep breath, you got off your horse and crouched to watch the train approach. Jobs like this were always risky, but the rewards were worth it. 

And with Arthur at your back, you felt like you could take on the world.

***

“This is a robbery! Put yer valuables in the bag, and no one gets hurt.”

A slight shiver went down your spine as Arthur yelled and growled his way through the passenger car. The way he stalked around, using his size to his advantage, did something to your insides like nothing else.

You were almost at the end of the passenger car, when you heard gunshots and voices outside.

“We’re comin’ for you!”

“Time to leave,” you barked as you took the last necklace from a rich lady and stuffed it into your bag. There was no arguing as the three of you booked it to the exit. Looking outside, you whistled for your horse as you took in the three flat bed cars that you’d need to run through to get to the last train car. Taking a deep breath, you started to run towards the end of the train.

Gunshots rang out near your head as you ran across the flat bed cars, splinters from the crates flying everywhere. Quickly rolling down and hiding behind a pile of bags, you looked over to Arthur and John as you pulled out your cattleman.

They had also hunkered down behind piles of cargo and pulled out their guns. Arthur gripped his rifle as he looked at you.

“We hafta move!” Arthur yelled to you over the gunshots.

“I know, I know!” 

Peering over the cargo, you waited for a lull in the gunfire and dashed for the end car. You knew Arthur & John had followed you from the sounds of them running behind you. As the three of you dodged and weaved from cover to cover, you looked back and saw Arthur’s hat get shot off his head.

Without thinking, you turned around. Ignoring Arthur’s shouts of your name, you dove out to grab the hat, rolling through the gun fire to duck behind the nearest crate.

Putting his hat on your head, you took a deep breath. After firing a few cover shots, you quickly weaved back towards the boys, who were firing furiously at the lawmen who were riding next to the train.

You barreled past them, through the last car. Opening the door, you saw your faithful horse, galloping with John & Arthur’s horses. 

As Arthur came up behind you, you silently plopped his hat back on his head. 

"You coulda-"

"You can thank me later," you said, interrupting Arthur as you took a leap off the end of the train, landing near your horse. The men followed suit, the three of you quickly mounting up and galloping away from the tracks towards the forest. 

The sounds of other horses coming up behind you made you feel tired more than scared.

"Split up, meet y'all back at camp," you commanded as you made a hard right turn deeper into the forest. 

***

You were pretty sure you had lost the men who had followed you. Hiding in a thicket near an abandoned campsite, you and your horse were resting for a bit before taking the long way back to camp. After about half an hour, it finally seemed safe, and you slowly rode out of the thicket and cantered north towards more open ground. 

A rope suddenly came out of nowhere and yanked you off your horse. 

"Gaaaah!" you yelped as your butt hit the ground. Instinctively you rolled to your feet, only to be tackled back to the ground by a heavy body. 

"Finally caught you, little bitch," the man panted as he got up and turned you over to tie you up. You felt him lean into your neck and breathe in deep. 

"An omega… Interesting."

You froze. Betas usually couldn't smell you. Which meant… 

The man turned you over into your back and stared down at you, his eyes glowing red. 

"You'd get a much better price at a brothel than at the sheriff's." He grinned, his eyes gleaming with lust. "Maybe I'll try you first, make you keen with my cock deep inside-" 

The man didn't finish his sentence as he dropped dead, a knife embedded in his neck. 

Arthur came out of the shadows, looking furious. 

"What the hell were you doin', lettin' someone catch you?" 

You felt a rush of relief. 

Relief that he came back. 

For you.

Looking at all the blood on Arthur's shirt, your eyes followed a path to the gash on his left arm. You met his eyes, a questioning look on your face. 

"I'm alright," he answered. 

You sighed. "I thought I told you to go back to camp," you said, trying to sound annoyed. 

"Like I ever listen to you," he grumbled, walking closer to you. Almost in slow motion, he reached up and stroked your cheek, his eyes scanning you for any injuries. Then his eyes came back up to yours and for a moment, you hoped for something more. 

Then the moment passed, and his arm came down once more. 

"Best be goin', before more hunters come fer you," he muttered, turning back to get his horse without waiting to see if you'd follow. 

He knew you would. 

You got back on your horse as he got back on his, the two of you riding back to camp in silence.

**'

Arriving in camp well after Marston, he heckled both of you until you pulled out the bag of valuables and counted the small fortune inside. Dutch and Hosea, proud of your efforts, broke out a case of whiskey and gathered the gang to celebrate your victory. 

After a few drinks and singing with everyone, you noticed that Arthur still hadn't dressed his wound. Taking him by the elbow, you pointed at his tent. 

"Let's get that cut taken care of," you ordered as you dragged him up and led him to his tent. 

***

“You’re a damn idiot.”

“Then you’re a fool for following this damn idiot.”

“Never said I wasn’t!”

Arthur childishly stuck his tongue out at you, and you pinched near the graze on his arm.

“Ow, now why would you do that to an injured man?”

“Because you’re clearly not injured enough if you have energy to stick your tongue out at me,” you shot back.

Arthur looked at you, and you looked at him. After a moment, the two of you burst out laughing. The feeling of irritation was gone; now only a sense of camaraderie and trust remained, as it always did at the end of a job.

But tonight there was still a tension between you two, as you slowly finished wrapping the bandage around Arthur’s arm. His skin was hot, his scent strong. You wanted to curl up into his arms and just let him hold you forever.

You resisted taking a deep breath; taking in his scent like that would only make things worse. You had to get out of the tent. 

“Hey.”

You looked up and focused your eyes on Arthur.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his eyes searching yours, worry written on his face.

“I-I’m fine.”

“Yer lyin’.”

“I'm not,” you protested ineffectively. After a look of skepticism from Arthur, you sighed. “How can you tell?”

“By how your eyes dart to the left when yer thinkin’.” He reached up and stroked your lower lip with his thumb. “By how your lips twitch to the right while yer talkin’.” Then Arthur leaned in closer to you, his face unbearably close to yours. “And by how your eyelashes flutter when you finish lyin’ to me.”

You couldn’t stand it any longer. You surged forward and kissed him. He was stock still, his body stiff as a board as you pulled away from him. Looking at his shocked face, you instantly regretted being so bold. In a moment of emotional overload, had you ruined your friendship?

“I’m sorry, I’ll go-” You stammered as you got up to exit the tent.

Arthur’s hand shot out lighting quick. Grabbing your wrist and pulling you back to him, he sat you back down. Leaning in close, he looked at you, his gaze searching you for something. 

“Sweetheart,” Arthur breathed. “Every feelin’ behind that kiss. You mean it?”

“Yeah, I do. Every damn feeling.” 

He suddenly tugged you into his arms and kissed you like his life depended on it. The dam had burst; the longing and yearning that had consumed you both for years was finally being fulfilled. With each kiss, your hearts grew closer and closer, culminating into this one moment, where you and he could become one, forever more, never to part. 

“Arthur, I never… I never thought you’d feel the same for me.”

“I think I have for a long time, just… didn’t want to admit it. I thought you’d think it’d be weird, havin’ me love you like this.”

“We’ve wasted so much time…”

“Let’s make it up, here and now.” He kissed you again, picking you up and laying you on his cot. “We won’t ever be apart, darlin’.”

He kissed you, slowly savoring your sweet surrender as his hands clasped you close to him. Feeling his warmth, his heartbeat, his lips as they trailed down your neck, you felt your body reacting, changing. 

"Arthur," you purred, feeling your slick start to drip from you. 

Eyes flashing red, Arthur cupped your cheek with his big hand, his thumb caressing your temple. "Yer eyes, they're the most beautiful gold," he murmured. 

"I need you," you whispered desperately. 

"You have me." He started to take off your clothes, eagerly kissing the revealed skin as you reached for his buttons, helping him to remove whatever you could get your hands on. For each piece of your clothing that came away, you pulled off a piece of his. 

You were in just your chemise and drawers, and he in his short drawers, when you felt yourself heating up. Your heart pounded, your vision blurred slightly around the edges. 

Arthur sniffed the air, paused for a moment, then his pupils nearly dilated as a deep rumble came from him. He grabbed your drawers and nearly tore them off before grabbing your knees and spreading you open to his hungry look. He looked at you, his eyes glowing an alpha's deep red. 

"Darlin'," he rumbled, "is all that fer me?" 

You nodded. 

He dipped his head down and lapped languidly at your core, sending ribbons of pleasure through your system. His hands reached under your chemise, grabbing at your breasts and squeezing, palming, massaging you. Teasing your nipples with his fingers, he kissed his way up your stomach. 

"Let's get this offa you," he said as he helped you sit up and pulled your chemise over your head. Sitting naked before him, his gaze roamed over your body. 

"Fer the first time, I truly see you," he said, leaning in and kissing you gently, a reverent touch on your lips. He moved to your cheek, then down your neck, where he took in a deep breath, drowning himself in your pheromones. 

Stepping back for a moment, he let his own drawers drop to the ground. Your eyes widened as you saw all of him for a split second before he climbed on top of you, covering you as you lay on his cot, surrounded by his scent. 

Arthur returned to your neck, nipping lightly as he ground his body against yours. His attentions grew heated as he began to suck on your skin near your collarbone, hard enough to leave a mark. 

Your gasps were followed by his quiet laughter. 

"Just a li'l somethin' to remember me by."

You wrapped your arms around him as he grinded against your core with his hard shaft. He kept kissing you, giving you love bites, and burying his face in the crook of your neck as he worked his member between your folds, lubing himself up in your slick. 

After a little while, he sat up. Your eyes followed his hand as he reached down to grasp his cock, a look of need on his face. Slowly, he guided himself into you, meeting your eyes as he started to enter, your body accepting his so willingly. Sliding inside, he held his breath as he felt you gripping him, a warm, soft feeling that he never wanted to end. 

You took shallow breaths, trying to relax your body to take in his girth. He was thick, filling you up and making you feel so damn good. You wrapped your legs around his and reached out to squeeze his butt. Under your hands, his muscles flexed as he pushed the rest of the way inside of you, his pelvis flush with yours. 

"Better than I dreamed," he said, looking at you with a torrent of passion in his eyes. "Like we were made to be together."

Arthur slowly pulled out and pressed his forehead to yours. 

"I'm gonna take you now, alright?" 

"Yes, please Arthur!" 

"That's my girl," he rumbled before he slammed back into you, making you choke back a cry. His thrusts were strong, deep, making sure you were completely filled with each shove of his hips. 

"Mine," he growled as he increased his speed, rutting into you so hard that the cot creaked. He no longer cared if everyone could hear; he wanted to make it known that you were his, and if anyone even thought about touching you, they'd suffer for it. 

You mewled his name, your heat in full bloom, driving you to sheer ecstasy as you lost your sense of self, drowning in Arthur's possession of your body. Scratching his back as he started to give you love marks all over your chest, you moaned at the feel of his lips and teeth on your skin. The sweet balance of pain and pleasure pushed you into a trance, where all you could focus on was where your bodies met, the possessive crush of him against you.

Arthur growled into your neck, a reverberation you could feel through you as his hips began to grind into yours, putting a glorious pressure on your clit. Arching your back, you wantonly rocked your hips in time with his thrusts. Your breath came out in short puffs, your heart beat a million miles a second, and you could feel the heat rushing through your entire being. 

"That's it darlin'," he murmured. "Give me everythin'." 

He covered your mouth with his just as you let out a cry of ecstasy, your eyes squeezing shut as your climax swept through you like a thunderstorm, the beat of your blood in your ears, lightning bolts of pleasure coursing through your veins. 

And all the while, Arthur had not stopped taking you, pistoning in and out as you writhed under him.

As you became limp, he pulled out of you and rolled you over onto your belly. Lifting up your hips, he entered you from behind, filling you up from a different angle. You let out a low moan, biting his pillow to muffle your volume. Arthur reached down to play with your center, rebuilding your desire, one stroke at a time. 

Leaning over you, he kissed the back of your neck. As he made soft hums of approval at your moans and whimpers, he sped up his thrusts. Just as you were reaching yet another peak, you felt his teeth scrape the back of your neck. 

"May I..?"

"Yes, do it," you pleaded. 

Arthur wasted no time sinking his teeth into your neck as he plowed his cock deep into you, his movements erratic. He made low sounds of satisfaction as he spent himself inside of you, the knot at the base of his shaft growing to lock him to you. 

"No place I'd rather be," he mumbled against your hair as he rolled the two of you onto your sides and held you close. “Been dreamin’ of this.”

“For how long?”

“Longer than I care to admit.”

You laughed. “Too long, then.”

He caressed your cheek and smiled wryly. "Didn't realize how much I needed you." 

You smiled back. "At least you figured it out."

Arthur let out a soft chuckle. “Better late than never.”

Nodding, you held his hand and brought it up to your lips. Kissing his fingertips tenderly, you held back your tears of joy. 

“Yes, better late than never.”

--------------------

End Notes: Tried my hand at A/B/O dynamics, and while it’s a little tame compared to what’s out there, I felt that I needed just enough to accentuate the main story. Hope you all enjoyed it!

[inspector-montoya-fox]

is the Sly Cooper series misogynistic?

is it though?? throughout the series, we only have six major female characters (seven if we count Jing King): Carmelita, Mz Ruby, Neyla, the Contessa, Penelope and Henriette. that’s it, we’re not given anything else to work with. maybe i’m being a bit harsh by asking if it’s ‘misogynistic’ but you know what i’m getting at. there’s not enough female representation, that’s for sure. but from the few female characters we get, are we satisfied?

let’s talk about Carmelita. she’s a fucking powerhouse who also accepts help when needed. she’s not a flawless female, but she’s not a mean old witch either. she’s a well-written female character unfortunately stuck in a Romeo and Juliet type of plot. but it works. her constant interference in the story is at times the only female thing about the series, and we all love her (if you don’t love her unfollow me and block me). i’ve mentioned before that Sly and Carmelita are one of the few straight couples that don’t seem cheesy, forced, etc. we’re actually rooting for them to get together because, (a) Sly isn’t the stereotypical dude even though his flirty lines are extremely that dude-ish, and (b) he wants what’s best for Carmelita, and doesn’t undercut her as a female. he wants her because she’s a strong woman, because of the adrenaline rush she gives him when she chases after him. he doesn’t want her because she’s beautiful, hot, a woman; he wants her for what she is and for what she stands for, for what successful career she has and for what she means to him.

and then i thought about how Sly’s relationship with Carmelita might seem misogynist in that she becomes his subordinate... here’s the thing: we never actually see them together as a couple. Sly 3 ends there and the rest is left up to our imagination. Sly is kind of a jackass for letting her believe he has amnesia, but ignorance is bliss...? either way, in order for Carmelita to become his subordinate, she would have to be his superior in the first place, and i don’t think that’s the case. i think they are equals, on opposite sides of the law. they are both honourable and morally good, but they are fighting for different causes (when not uniting for the greater good) and have different aims and purposes. as the story progresses throughout all three games, Carmelita becomes more and more of an independent woman and character, escaping the confines of ‘romantic interest’. in Sly 1 she starts off as that annoying cop which Sly blatantly gets rid of in very questionable ways (sending her flying on a huge balloon, demolishing the huge dragon she’s standing on), but by the end of the trilogy she’s the one who smashes Clockwerk’s hate chip and she’s the one who comes to Sly’s rescue when trapped by Dr M. even if they get together, she’s still his equal. she doesn’t change for Sly, she’s still the feisty. hot-headed cop-lady, but she also has every right to fall for her target. she’s not undermined in any way.

let’s move on to a wider scope. i know that ‘women in professions’ is so 80s conservative US, but it shouldn’t be overlooked that almost all the women in the series are absolute pros at what they do. Carmelita is a top Interpol inspector, Neyla gets promoted to captain whilst being a criminal mastermind, the Contessa is a respected prison warden and “psychiatrist”, Penelope is a tech genius, and Henriette is a master thief (Mz Ruby... she’s doing her own thing). but at the same time, they’re not polished idolatry characters. when not chasing after the raccoon, Carmelita likes to read, listen to music and visit art galleries: things that ground and humanise her. Penelope is also presented in such a light, by having her be as much a nerd as Bentley, uploading a fake avi online, etc. having the two heroines interact with other characters also helps them break out of the ‘romantic interest’ mould. i’m thinking of the Penelope x Murray x Panda King dynamic, or when Carmelita abducts Murray. on the other side, we have female villains that outsmart everyone. the Contessa pretends to work for Interpol, when in reality she’s a member of the Klaww Gang, whereas Neyla manages to scam the Cooper Gang, Interpol and the Klaww Gang.

Sly 3 really set out to change some things. two new female characters were introduced (both bearing story arcs that had to do with sexuality), whilst Carmelita became a playable character. let’s analyse: first off, Carmelita as a playable character. although her gameplay was scarce, SP managed to leave an impression by making her a total force to be reckoned with. the shock pistol would burn the guards to a crisp with just a few hits, and the super jump was everything Sly never was, never could be. the missions were also memorable and very fun (the Muggshot bossfight, Turf War! and A Battery of Peril). and then we were introduced to Penelope, the first female gang member. sure, she added necessary diversity to the Cooper gang, but the focal point here is her storyline. dressing up as a male because no one would take her seriously otherwise? hmm... seems as if SP did some self-reflecting when writing the plot for Sly 3. dawning the persona of the Black Baron not only made her a tragic character, but it also helped push the game’s thematic depth (?) even further. lastly, Jing King might not have been a major character (we never even saw her face ffs), but her story arc was extremely impactful. subtle reminder: forced marriage. making her faceless might have made her seem like less of a victim and made Tsao seem like more of a monster, but the forced marriage was still there. then there’s also the innuendo of him being a huge cock, so... anyway, the Cooper gang rescuing Jing King and preventing the wedding, but also Carmelita being the one who puts an end to Tsao’s misogynistic she’s a woman! she doesn’t know up from down bullshit, is all SP needed to do. verdict: Sly 3 added the female diversity and empowerment the series was in desperate need of.

i don’t think the series is misogynistic btw. i just think it lacks diversity. i think it has well-written female characters and what really saves it from coming off as misogynistic is the variety. there’s a variety of women here, each one standing for something different. i mean... what else do y’all want?

[sly-fcking-cooper]

uno reverse card at you for the top 5 sly missions B)

Oooof!

1.Lemon Rage because every single facet of it is hilarious. I think this whole mission is PEAK Cooper Gang dynamic. The brawl isn’t difficult, but still super fun. The banter offered is God tier.

2. I have to pick a Carmelita level. And I definitely have to agree with you in terms of Beauty and the Beast. Bentley’s savagery in this is second to none. The pure darkness of actually saying nothing when Muggshot insists he says something nice, or nothing at all, is hilarious. But genuinely, the battle between Inspector Fox and Muggshot is so good, so empowering, and so fun.

3. Operation: Canada Games - Had a really nice change-up in terms of gameplay for the first half (even though a few of the challenges were INFURIATING), the boss fight against Jean Bison is SO good, and the ending of the episode results in an amazing climax that really moves the plot forward and leads to the gang being trapped in the battery. I think it does justice for how much I loved the Canada level.

4. I have to mention Guard Duty because I replayed this about 20 BILLION times as a kid for the dialogue. Pasta Sauce. I also got a real kick out of trying disguises for the first time and genuinely enjoyed the painting-password-hunt.

5. Mz Ruby Battle. Sly 1′s missions are hard to compare because the next few games offer so much more depth and layers to each mission, but as a musician I pretty much smashed the rhythm QTE-style part first time, even as a kid, and enjoyed it so much. She’s a really good villain.

Honorable mentions: 

DANCING IN SLY 2 BECAUSE DANCING WITH NEYLA/CARMELITA AND THE ENTIRE SCENE IS JUST FUN TO PLAY AND GREAT DIALOGUE. AND I LOVE STEALY WHEELY MISSIONS AND STEALING A TUX WAS JUST GREAT. ACES Semi-Finals / Finals, because the gameplay was super fun, and I really enjoy Dimitri’s encouraging commentary. Charging the battery in China.  The mega-jump job in Sly 2, because FUN AS HELL,  Talk of Pirates because...literally, talking as a pirate, and also the Galleon battles because OH MY GOD SO FUN, and so much MONEY. 

Any of the bear-related tasks in Sly 2 for the line ‘the love of a mother for her child’ / ‘you got something to tell me Bentley?’. Bentley singing his heart out in Operation: Tar Be Gone! From Sly 4, I’d probably pick the Circus level, because it’s insanely fun. But same as you, I can’t justify any of Sly 4 being on the Top 5.