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eighthdoctor · 4 months

Note

Star for the directors cut ask thingy!!

Thank you for the ask, I am very sorry for the MASSIVE ESSAY you got in return for a fic I do not think you have read in a fandom I am sure you're not in.

AN ENTIRE WEEK TO ANSWER because I overthought it and then got distracted.

What a fucking mood.

Anyway, this chunk from the very first chapter of The Power to Manipulate Belief, because I'm doing really a million things here and not all of them are obvious.

Matters spiral rapidly. Sylvanas jumps tree to tree a second ahead of a frostbolt, puts three arrows in the air at once and doesn’t look to see where they land, and finishes by blurring into mist to gain an extra ten feet of space. It’s almost enough. It’s not enough. Proudmoore is Blinking forward at a speed Sylvanas has never seen from her, moving recklessly through the forest—she must be guessing at where to land, it’s sheer luck that she hasn’t collided with a tree—and the moment she gets close enough, she hauls open a portal right in front of the tree Sylvanas is diving to. Shifting back that fast hurts, it’s a pound she’ll take out of Proudmoore’s flesh later, but she manages to avoid falling through the portal to the Alliance camp. Corporeal again, she sends another three arrows at Proudmoore, turns, jumps and grabs for a tree branch, and turns again to face Proudmoore. She just needs a second’s pause to draw in enough breath to Wail, and then they’ll both learn what a Banshee can do to an archmage. Unfortunately, Proudmoore has Blinked again, and this time she’s misjudged her destination. She collides with Sylvanas, knocking them both from the tree. Sylvanas can’t quite manage the shift back to mist that fast, but she can turn and roll as they’re falling, putting Proudmoore beneath her. That’s when Proudmoore opens a portal in the fucking ground, and all of Sylvanas’s efforts go to nothing. She can’t get out of range of the portal; she can’t throw Proudmoore away from it either, for whatever good that will do. For a moment, as they’re falling, she sees Alleria’s camp and curses Proudmoore’s quick thinking—yes, the ren’dorei would be the best suited to capture her, assuming that Alleria didn’t finish the job first—but then the portal flickers—flickers?—and then it’s too late.

It’s the worst portal Jaina has ever been through. Something went wrong from the moment she set it up, and then more wrong when they went into it. She can recite fourteen lectures on not using portals without adequate preparation to make sure you will actually turn up where—and how—you intend to, but until now it’s simply not been a problem for her. When in doubt, focus harder, and her portals do exactly what she wants them to. This one isn’t. They don’t come out at Alleria’s camp. For an agonizingly long time, they don’t come out anywhere, and it’s only the timeless nature of wherever they are—a darkness and nothing so complete it might be, but isn’t, the Void—that presumably keeps Sylvanas from throttling her. As it is, Sylvanas’s grip is painfully tight on her elbow and she’s going to have to figure out what to do with the Warchief now that she’s got her. The initial plan was to isolate her long enough to let other forces find them and eventually wear Sylvanas down; then she decided to throw Sylvanas at the reserves and capture her that way. The void elves were a gamble—Jaina wants Sylvanas alive as a hostage, Alleria wouldn’t hesitate—but she was running out of ideas. Now they’re somewhere else entirely. And it hurts. It’s not just Sylvanas’s grip. Something is burning at her hands and wrists, where she channels through. She’d scream if they weren’t outside of time, but the last time she felt pain like this, not just this bad but like this, was Theramore and that means something has gone horribly wrong. She wrangles power—more power—into the spell, trying to force it into compliance, even though portals never give her much trouble, she’s never had one fight her like this— They come out.

Which is like 600 words but fight me. Directors commentary under the cut.

Before I get going: Part of why this is going to be SO long, and why I chose this section in particular, is it's in the first chapter of the fic, and even the first chunk of the chapter. I knew posting this that posting a crossover with a fairly (and thankfully) unknown book series and promptly tagging it for rape was going to be a hard sell for a lot of people, so I had to establish quickly that I knew what I was doing. A lot of what I'm going to highlight in this post remained true for the entire first arc (Ch1-4) if not the whole fic, and a lot of this I wrote first and figured out the implications later.

Unlike some of my fics (Regfic in particular had five different starting points) I knew exactly where I wanted to open this one: If the plot is "I dump them on Gor together", the best mechanism for that is a portal going awry. Most likely this is a portal Jaina cast and it went wrong while pulling Sylvanas through, and there are two possible scenarios for that. Either one, Jaina has successfully captured Sylvanas (in which case, why does something go wrong with the portal?) or she is trying to catch Sylvanas.

Obviously I went with option B.

I also wanted to break the portal in a specific way, and not just have it be a fluke accident. I knew the Void elves/ren'dorei use Void portals which are metaphysically different from Jaina's arcane portals, and it is very textually clear that portals are, despite being a point-and-click spell, Extremely Easy To Fuck Up, so there I had it: One arcane portal and one Void portal to the exact same location at the exact same time, kaboom.

So that was the setup. I sat down to write it and think I banged out the better part of ch1 in a week. Then I went back for edits (memorably telling myself "add more spy v spy shit").

But let's zoom in and look at what I'm doing in this 600 word chunk specifically.

Starting with names. Sylvanas calls Jaina 'Proudmoore' exclusively; Jaina calls Sylvanas 'Sylvanas' most of the time (and Warchief once). So you get a good look on how they view each other right off the bat:

Sylvanas doesn't respect Jaina at all. As becomes clear later in the fic, Jaina is on first name terms with just about everyone she meets; she doesn't like standing on ceremony, and she has a very complex relationship with her family. So if you did want to be polite, it'd be titles and she'd try very hard to get you back to Lady Jaina which she can just about handle. And from Sylvanas it's surname only for ages.

Jaina...uh, also doesn't respect Sylvanas! Sylvanas is very concerned with being seen as the politically powerful person that she is, and she wants her titles unless the two of you are close. Which they're not. Admittedly calling her 'Windrunner' would get a little confusing given Sylvanas's sisters, but Jaina knows enough about Sylvanas to know that she's not on first name terms.

Or to sum up: Sylvanas is putting distance between herself and Jaina and Jaina is putting the two of them on the same political level. (Which they're not--Sylvanas heads one side of the war; Jaina leads a single country.)

When it came to the battle/fight scene I had to give enough to set things up, but didn't want to get bogged down in it. I thought of it like doing a camera zoom in, from the whole battlefield to this sparse little chase sequence. I think it works rather well.

Then I had to establish that they are equally deadly. Sylvanas is fleeing and in a 1v1 would lose, but she's also absolutely fighting back and making a good case for herself. Neither of them is dictating the terms of the fight, which winds up being the whole problem. (That is to say, Sylvanas would like this to be at a distance thank-you-very-much or possibly 1v10 or even 1v50, and Jaina would like Sylvanas to stop fucking moving. Neither of them can accomplish that right now.)

That’s when Proudmoore opens a portal in the fucking ground

This is one of my favorite lines in the whole fic because it tells us very concisely that Jaina just did something that a quel'dorei, who is upwards of 500 years old and from a society completely structured around arcane magic, thinks is nuts. Jaina did something that may not be impossible but is certainly insane. What the fuck girl.

The last paragraph in Sylvanas's POV tells you more or less what happened with the portal, as long as you're fluent in Warcraft lore: Alleria's camp means ren'dorei means Void casters, and portals shouldn't flicker. That shouldn't be possible.

Cue Jaina's POV, who very much agrees with that being impossible.

Jaina has a chattier POV than Sylvanas, full of little snarky asides and memories. (Sylvanas also does snarky asides but they're much more pointed and mean.) So that gave me the opportunity to remind everyone that Jaina is in the top 5 mages on the planet and a genius in her own right ("She can recite fourteen lectures on not using portals without adequate preparation to make sure you will actually turn up where—and how—you intend to, but until now it’s simply not been a problem for her").

Which of course only serves to reinforce that shit just got fucked. This should NOT have happened. Jaina does NOT approve. There is going to be so much paperwork when she gets home.

it’s only the timeless nature of wherever they are—a darkness and nothing so complete it might be, but isn’t, the Void

I'm sure that's fine. This is, roughly, the metaphysical gap between fictional universes, and it's not a great place to be.

Anyway, Jaina helpfully shares what her plan was: She wanted to capture Sylvanas, which she technically has accomplished. Jaina thinks Sylvanas is more useful (functionally) alive than (finally) dead, which is a theme I'll return to repeatedly--Jaina likes second chances, or fifth chances, as long as you're not going to be stupid about them. She believes people can change (although she's not applying that to Sylvanas here), and, more pragmatically, that killing Sylvanas would just enable the Horde to pick a new Warchief.

And then we get to the hands.

This has implicitly come up in fic but it hasn't been explicitly discussed; on the other hand I do say exactly what's happened here in this passage so you know. Director's cut now with some spoilers.

Something is burning at her hands and wrists, where she channels through. She’d scream if they weren’t outside of time, but the last time she felt pain like this, not just this bad but like this, was Theramore and that means something has gone horribly wrong. She wrangles power—more power—into the spell, trying to force it into compliance, even though portals never give her much trouble, she’s never had one fight her like this—

When the portals collided, it produced an incredible amount of extra energy, nuclear reactor level of "I banged two things together to make more energy". That had to go through something, and the path of least resistance was Jaina. Jaina's ability to funnel that amount of magical power is the only reason the two of them weren't splattered over multiple continents.

Hence the shoutout to Theramore: She has had a massive quantity of magical energy pass through her and had to wrangle it into Not Killing Her Instantly. She's done that before. This should feel familiar because it is.

tl;dr in 600 words I establish that neither of the main pairing respects the other, but they're still very much equals in the setting, and also show the plot device that's stranding them in another universe & start addressing why it can't just be Solved by someone else.

I'm very proud of this chunk.

#asks for ts #heckofabecca #the power to manipulate belief

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sn00pism · 1 year

Text

College student Bachira Meguru

A little thingy I decided to do while in class.

Also I'm a literature minor, education major so there's that... Bachira Meguru x reader.

Bachira saw you in your literature class one day and suddenly the room brightened, the way you spoke with passion about it, how you debated your classmates opinions and how you carried yourself.

He was kinda crushing on you.

Passing the class proved to be more difficult than he thought, getting distracted every time you opened your mouth in addition to being unable to understand most things about the class.

Sure, he could understand themes and main ideas, but what the fuck is a literary theory?? What do you mean when you analyse the speech on a book? How did you even FINISH the book in the time given? He barely got past page 15.

Fortunately, that one class about colour theory and meaning on a small film and a small book was actually good and easy. His knowledge of art thanks to his mom and his major came useful during the class. Bonus points cause he got to attract your interest and actually get to converse with you in the form of opinions about the meaning of the lightning and colours.

He almost skipped to his dorm that day.

But he was failing the class so hard.

So, thanks to Isagi and friends, he mustered up the courage to approach you after class, bashfully explaining that he didn't know some things and forgot to take notes. You offered your notes to him.

God, you had to be an angel.

As he studied your notes, he quickly found out he really didn't get it, so when he gave them back to you and you asked if he understood your notes, he turned red and scratched his neck while looking away to avoid your gaze. "Not really... I think I just accepted I'm gonna fail this one and move on..."

You smiled, a soft understanding smile, as you offered to tutor him on it.

He could feel his eyes brightening and did his best to hide his happiness and excitement. He failed miserably and you laughed softly at his expressions showing clearly on his face and eyes.

"then... Uh, how about going out?" He realised what he said after a slight second of thought and quickly tried to explain himself, "wait, no, sorry" he shook his head and ran a hand through his face, "what I meant was, coffee, we could go for coffee and study?" As he peeled his hands from his face, he watched as you smiled amused.

"yeah, sounds good!" You looked down at your phone and then back at him, "tomorrow at 4 sounds good to you?"

He shouldn't have responded so fast. At least you laughed, a charming smile adorning your face, "see you tomorrow then!" You waved as you walked back into the campus.

He stood in his spot, eventually sitting down on a random seat and cheering slightly.

Oh my fucking God.

He found it hard to sleep that night, feeling like a little kid waiting for a school trip. He had his whole outfit and routine planned out, he'll, Chigiri and Aryu were coming over to help him style his hair and check if his outfit looked good (he didn't really trust his judgement on clothes).

When you saw him across the street, right at the steps of the café, waving slightly as he walked to stand in front of you. Heading inside, you both ordered your beverages, his was a soft pinkish drink with lots of whipped cream and yours was a small refresher made of mango; not too sweet but not bitter like the coffee you're used to getting when pulling an all nighter because your stupid professor decided to change the theme of your essay. Fuck that dude, honestly.

You noticed his hair was styled differently and pointed it out, telling him he looked cute and that you liked his usual hair style but this change was also welcome.

Bachira felt his insides melt into a pool of pink liquid, sinking into his veins and making his heart race harder.

As your study session comes to an end, it's already late. You sigh happily and stretch, Bachira found himself musing over how easy it was to understand the material when you explained it.

Heading out, you figure you're going in the same direction and when you spot a playground, the bright colours dimmed by the moonlight, you almost sprint to the swings, smiling at Bachira and apologizing about suddenly running off, "I haven't been in one of these for ages! I used to love this as a kid..." Bachira finds himself on the swing next to yours, lightly swinging himself the way you do.

As you both look up to the sky and the stars, he finds his gaze gravitating towards you, admiring the way the moon lit part of your face and how it gave your skin a slight glow.

"I thought about dropping the class..." He finds his mouth is quicker than his brain and he nearly short circuits at his confession, you smile and look at him, finding his softened gaze already on you, setting your cheeks ablaze on a soft pink, barely there.

"what made you stay?" Your voice was quiet, as to not disturb the stillness of the atmosphere that had formed between you two.

"You." He chuckles softly as he looks at the ground, missing your slightly shocked face and blush spreading to your ears, "Me? Why?"

He smiles and looks back up, right ahead into the street and the softly lit houses of the neighbourhood, "You talked so... Passionately... About everything... And you just had a glimmer in your eyes each time you nailed something..." He lets out a soft laugh. "You looked so beautiful... I just had to stay if I wanted to see you often." He shakes his head and looks down, blush appearing on his cheeks, "I just so happened to be an absolute idiot in the subject."

You laughed at him, promptimg him to look at you, just yo catch a glimpse of that beautiful smile and the way your eyes crinkled.

You ended up talking about everything and anything. That's how you found out he was on the soccer them for the university.

"that's awesome! I've never been a sporty girl, definitely not soccer..." You smiled bashfully, "I don't know anything about it..."

Bachira smiled, this was his other chance to shoot his shot, he needed to get a little bold. "I could teach you about it... You know to repay you." You laugh and nod, "sure, soccer classes in exchange for literature classes" he smiles at how silly that sounds, "what would be the best way to teach me then?" You tease him slightly, bumping his arm with yours as you leaned over in your swing.

"You could come to my games... You know, to see and then I'd explain some key elements..."

Your eyes widened slightly, isn't going to games a thing couples do? Or are you getting your hopes up?

You nod anyways, "okay! I'm expecting front row seat though" He bursts out laughing and nods slightly, "First row seat for my lady" He extends his hand for you to take, desperately trying to hide his nervousness. And so you take it, "why thanks, good sir".

And when it gets even later, he walks you home, neither of you letting go of the hand of the other, while you talked happily about everything and anything once again, conversation flowing easily. Like two pieces of a puzzle coming together to form a beautiful picture.

I think I might be falling in love. Even this thought is shared between you two.

#blue lock #bllk #bllk headcanons #bllk x y/n #blue lock scenarios #bachira bllk #bachira blue lock #bachira fluff #bachira headcanons #bachira meguru #bachira x you #bachira x reader #bllk bachira #blue lock bachira #blue lock meguru bachira #meguru x reader

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lipglossanon · 1 year

Note

Hi Lipgloss (i am laughing as i write this actually) this is gonna sound unhinge but have you heard about those Clone-your-willy thingies, where you can clone your or your partners willy into an interesting toy and i cant help but wonder what all the versions of your leons would react coming across it from the readers google search/amazon cart/ or the reader asked them to do it.. i am cackling as i write this.

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a15831043/clone-a-willy-experiment-essay/

Hiya!! 🥰

And funny enough I have heard of this beforehand! 🤣 🤣 and oh my gosh, I think Leon (no matter which version) would definitely be down to do it 🤭 🤭 however short little blurbs under the cut 😉

Stepdad Leon

Teases you relentlessly, like gets you all hot and bothered about it

Is 100% into doing it

Once it’s finished and you have a dildo of his dick, he definitely fucks you with it while you suck him off

And/or vice versa 🤭

Has you masturbate with it while he watches 🫣

Alcoholic/Sweet Stepdad

Finds it so funny!

But not in a mean way More of a you’re so cute! this is a silly fun idea 🥰 kinda way lol

Is definitely down to do it

Is also really flabbergasted that you’d even want a replica

But definitely sees the appeal when he comes home late from work and you’re already in his bed completely wrecked from using his dick double lmao

Dark Stepdad

Gets so turned on

You want him so much to ask for even more? Yes yes and yes

He’s similar to OG stepdad and likes to watch you fuck yourself with the replica

Has you fuck the toy while he uses a fleshlight and just talks dirty to you the whole time

“My cock feel good baby? Aww I know, you’re pussy’s barely able to stretch enough for me to fit. Maybe we should see if we can fit both of me in that tight little hole huh? Really stretch that cunt like she needs.” 🥵

Stepbro Leon:

Like OG stepdad, teases you about it so much 🤭

But really finds the idea super hot

Once it’s ready to use, he fucks toy with it nonstop it seems

Will literally tease you with his cock then pull out and use the toy to make you cum

Likes to make you cockwarm the replica while you’re hanging out for family movie nights and stuff 😵‍💫

Subby stepbro:

Is surprised but definitely down to do it 🤭

Kinda like sweet stepdad where he doesn’t really get it

But once you tie him to your bed where he can’t do anything but watch you fuck the fake cock right above his real one, he’s 100% on board

Loves to be cucked by his own dick 🤭 🤭

#ask box #roses between my thighs #stepcest #stepbro leon s kennedy #stepdad leon s kennedy #lipglossanswers #lipglossanon

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wetalkedaboutthisshinji · 10 months

Text

Ramblings about Chris Elman and wtf his identity even is

I'm talking all endgame spoilers for Ward so PLEASE dont read if you haven´t finished it.

(SPOILERS FOR WARD)

Eventually I'll make an actual essay about Ward because there a lot of stuff. Ward is, IMO, not bad but is such a confusing absolute chaos of good and interesting ideas that kinda get lost in the haze of insanity. Like I do think Ward is good but it's the least good of all of Wildbow's stuff that I've read and I sincerely feel if he actually editted it it would be as good or better than Worm but he wont so whatev. I guess I'll just scream to the void.

Also, OOOOOOFFF because Chris is actually a very complex character! And this complexities IMO are NOT well examined in the story proper! My hot take is simply that Wildbow just kinda....didn't fully explain or problematize or, like, made a plot of this, despite it clearly being both set up for it as well as quite honestly necessary to understand one of the main characters.

What is even Chris's mental age?

In a way Chris is a clone with all the memories of a man somewhere between 20-40 years old. He was made specifically to relive the traumatic events of his creator's life so that he would trigger in the exact same way and have the same powers, an utterly insane idea that hadnt even been shown to be possible. He retains traumas and anger from this life, despite it not being technically his own, and in his own internal narrative often sees himself as Lab Rat, the minor villain that turns out was actually one of the most powerful villains in this universe. Several people treat Chris not as his own person but as Lab Rat cheating death, coming back.

Note 1: the reveal that Lab Rat is Chris's creators is THE WORST twist Wildbow ever did. It comes out of NOWHERE, it's about a character that had NO relevance since Worm ending and no presence in Ward proper and, while not IMPOSSIBLE in this universe it takes so many unlikely stuff and leaps of logic that it just...wow. They really do it like they expect the audience to flip their shit but I had to wiki walk a lot to even get what was going on. And when I did my answer was not "Holy shit! This is crazy" but a very confused "Is that how triggers even work?"

I believe the issue was that commentors on the webpage where so filled with complex headcanons that when Wildbow decided to follow on one of them everybody that was there week by week was so busy losing their minds to even contemplate the fact that it was all kinda from left field.

Note 2: My personal headcanon is that Chris and Lab Rat have actually slightly different abilities as Chris seems more focused on serums that temporarily grant powers instead of just making monsters but that might be just how they are different in their usage of their powers --another point for "Chris is not Lab Rat" bag imo. Also he's clearly a Trump? Like, he can clearly mix powers? Isn't that OP? Why doesn't anyone react to this random suddenly becoming Eidolon Lite?

Going back to the main topic, the other thing about Chris is that in another wqay he began existing sometime around Gold Morning so he's also 2 years? He is the thingy that Taylor Hebbert helped Lab Rat toss over the ocean. The monster maker's last creation, made out of a dare, to show how great this own power really was, made to do "something big". Created out of hubris, whim and irresponsability.

Chris began existing as a literal monster without a human body, possible non-sentient, driven by "directives" that he biologically has to follow. So in a way he is kinda close to Nilbog's creations, as a byproduct of parahumans irresponsably going all Frankenstein. The way he constantly associates himself with monsters and non-humans is...kinda a point from him? And this clearly informed his actions on the Titanomaquia but it was A Bit Rushed (take a drink when you say this regarding a secondary character on Ward ending).

And like, he is also clearly dominated by the "Directives" his creator left and those drive him but he kinda rationalizes them as things that he truly wants and becomes emotionally invested in them but at the same time you could argue he IS a victim of his own creation....but nobody finds out he even has directives he HAS to follow. Not to mention the insanity of sometimes seeing yourself as a person but at the same time having orders of that same person installed since birth in your head in a way that you cannot fight.

And, like, he himself seems to be incapable of making up his mind whether or not he is his creator? Like he sometimes seems to truly believe himself to be this older man, despite the fact that he's physically another body and also began existing as a completely different being and demostrably has different attitudes and has to follow the order of the original Lab Rat. But he still has his memories, his hatred for people, his grudge against his sister. So he does have more maturity than a 12-year old. But he IS immature because he's also 2 years old. Victoria essentially forgives everything he pulls because she essentially internalizes him as even more of a child than Kenzie and, well, not wrong? His actions really do scream of a child going "You can hit me :P" at times with Team Breakthrough, which arguably are the first and only people that have treated him as his own person, something he himself is not sure he is or isn't. So he lashes out at them and constantly annoys them but it's always this extremely self-destructive thing? It's a very compelling dynamic, a friend turned enemy that kinda just wants to attention but doesn't want to admit it. He wants to be validated as an evil monster but this people have seen both sides of him and know he is closer to an annoying 12 year old that he himself will ever be to the Endbringers.

Jessica outright believes him to be his own being and sincere about heroics and when she asks him what he truly is Chris just shrugs? Because he himself doesnt know and his only real way to treat humans is lying to them so he has never been able to even be aware of it all?

And like, Jessica KNEW. And you could argue that it's a plot hole that she allowed Chris into the team because she fell for his lie and openly wasn't worried about him turning evil. But I would very much indeed like to understand what would it mean for Chris, who began life as a literal monsters during a war and was forced into memories that werent his to be trusted by another person. And what Jessica saw in him to make her believe he could be a hero.

Dont worry tho, Jessica disappears at the end of Ward and this is not examined in any way. Take a drink!

IMO the whole Chris arc is for me one of the parts where Wildbow really dropped the ball because IT IS important and IT IS interesting and there is so much you can do with it but he just kinda stays in the background most of the time.

#ward #wardblr #team breakthrough #ward spoilers #chris elman #cryptid

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phantomdecibel · 1 year

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@teamfortresstwo @ghosty-crow so remeber that essay-analysis thingy i mentioned I was writing abt hnoc and mordred’s relationship w the saxon? yeah finished it just now :3

ignore. the fact that it’s written like a pretentious english class midterm essay haha ive been writing too many essays recently ive been infected-

...

...anyways here:

So maybe (definitely) I’ve just got a found family obsession, but DAM the more I think about Mordred’s relationship with the Saxon, the more I lose my fucking mind.

Like… it’s not explicitly stated. But they care for him so. much.

Listening to Skin and Bone, from the High Noon Over Camelot album, that conclusion has hit me in the face with a brick – about ten times over. The Saxon people and Mordred are a found family and they care about each other; he’s not just some kid they took pity on and brought home with them (Death, 0:33) – they actually cared and trusted him, and vice versa. In fact, I’d even go as far as to say that they were willing to try for peace with the people of Camelot not because of how it could benefit them – but for Mordred. Because it was important to him. Of course peace would benefit them for the reasons Mordred states during Skin and Bone – but as the Saxon say, also during the same song, nothing Camelot could offer them is of any real value to them. They’re surviving just fine as they are with the exception of getting murdered every once in a while – it just wouldn’t be worth the risk to meet up with the Camelot population for something they don’t believe in (“We care not for your fairytale; your childish quest is doomed to fail”. Skin and Bone, 2:00).

The Saxon have likely been around for… well, a really long time. Fort Galfridian fell centuries ago (stated in The Hierophant, 1:14, implied in both Holder of the GRAIL and Judgement), and the Saxon are likely just the people who didn’t move to the surface. They’ve been living in darkness for generations, and the implication is that when they come up to the surface, it’s usually at night or that they stay in the dark corners of town (Skin and Bone and Strength). Have you ever sat in a dark room for awhile and then stepped outside, and everything is blindingly bright? Well the Saxon have been living in darkness for the majority of their lives. Their eyes are adjusted to the dark (“In the dark we see, in the black we run”, Skin and Bone, 0:38) – in Skin and Bone they state that they can see in the dark; I think it’s safe to assume that they don’t see well in brightly lit areas, and the surface would be incredibly bright. Fort Galfridian is drifting into the fucking sun; everything is hotter and brighter than it should be, which would make areas without much light all the darker. Meeting with the people of Camelot on their home turf, in broad daylight, would be a huge disadvantage to the Saxon. They would be essentially blind in unfamiliar territory, and as effective a weapon their knives are, you actually have to get close to your opponent to use it. A gun is a long-range weapon – if it came down the blows, the Saxon would be slaughtered.

And they know this.

And they go anyways.

Why?

It all comes back to Mordred, doesn’t it? They went for Mordred.

They died, for Mordred.

You don’t do that, you don’t risk your life, the lives of all your people, for someone you don’t trust, for someone you don’t care about. You just don’t, why would you? And the world of High Noon Over Camelot is particularly kill or be killed. The Saxon have every right to be so cautious – but Mordred manages to convince them to walk into quicksand anyways.

Of course, it’s a lot more obvious that Mordred cares. In The Fool he states that his reason for going to the surface was for the Saxon; his entire goal for climbing the ranks among the Pendragons was for peace between Camelot and his adoptive family (0:30). He goes to talk with them as friends in Skin and Bone, and the things he offers them, abundant water and food, shelter, clean(er) air – are things they have, for the most part, but their resources still could be better. The Saxon have no want nor need for the sun, and they have adequate provisions. They’re perfectly happy where they are – but this is important to Mordred.

And Mordred is family. So – they’re willing to try.

For his sake.

This trust and care goes both ways – call me redundant, but Mordred cares about the Saxon, and the Saxon care about Mordred.

By the time Skin and Bone takes place, it has been established that there is a fierce animosity between the people of Camelot and the Saxon, and we are led to believe that Mordred has left them behind in favour of his biological father. Yet once he is finally given the power he needs to put his plans into motion, he walks back into the outskirts without a scratch, and greets the Saxon as friends (“My friends down here, I return to you”. Skin and Bone, 0:09). At this point he has been living in Camelot for years ([…] since he walked into Camelot, so many years ago” The Fool, 0:27), but still, he’s completely comfortable being back among the Saxon. There is nothing in the album that implies that he feels any fear or discomfort among them despite being gone for so long – in fact the literal fucking chorus of Skin and Bone is “you alone don’t hate what you now see”! What can we take from that? Not once have the Saxon given him any reason to fear them. Not when he was growing up, and not while he was gone. They didn’t kick him out and they didn’t say ‘once you leave you can’t come back’. If they had he would have been even just slightly apprehensive about going back to their territory, into the heart of their home. This is further evidenced by Skin and Bone – Mordred is never ridiculed or dismissed because he left, like the way Gwain taunts him when Mordred’s attempts at peace fail in Peacemaker. In fact, the one and only time it’s mentioned is near the end of the song, “You left us but now you show [I’ll show you peace]” (Skin and Bone, 2:34), and then the very next line is them agreeing to give his plan a try (“Then we will try,” Skin and Bone, 2:38). It’s contemplative, not accusatory, it’s them saying ‘you might have left, but now you’re back, and your intentions are good’. It’s them saying ‘you might have left, but we still trust you’. This is the only time it’s acknowledged other than Mordred going ‘hey guys guess who’s back :D’, and not once is it held over his head. To summarize; the implication here is that Mordred left the Saxons on amical terms, and he was not given an ultimatum or forced to choose between the two groups. This is important because the Saxon and the people of Camelot are enemies – they are described to be at war (“I beg you now, this war to cease”. Skin and Bone, 1:27).

Mordred’s peaceful parting from the Saxons to go live among their enemies implies that the Saxon hold a certain respect for him and his decisions, and the fact that they welcomed him back speaks of a great deal of trust. But back to the respect thing.

When Mordred shows up out of nowhere with his plan, the Saxon don’t shoot him down right away. They have a discussion about it, with each side outlining their arguments in a way that doesn’t put the other down. Mordred isn’t disrespecting their way of life, he’s offering them things that could benefit them, while the Saxon lay down why those things aren’t important to them, or that they’re more comfortable where they are now. Mordred respects this and when they shoot down an argument, he moves on. Similarly, the Saxon hear him out, even though they’re (rightfully) skeptical. While their lyrics bounce off of each other, at no point does Mordred or the Saxons speak over each other. They sing together at the end – but that is when the Saxon have accepted his proposition, a symbol of unity.

Mordred’s relationship with the Saxon is one built upon mutual respect and trust, a care for the other that goes both ways. In Judgment, a Saxon sees Mordred in danger, and immediately steps in to protect him (1:36). She is killed, because Gwain took her drawing her weapon as a sign of aggression, but Mordred appears to be unbothered by her wielding her seax, and mourned her death. He might not have seen the scorpion she was trying to protect him from, but he had full trust that she had not been attempting to harm him (“And saw in each slain Saxon the face of she who saved him” Peacemaker, 1:10). Not only that, but it is this unfounded death that finally drives him to violence. Mordred is stated to be a peaceful person, so much so that Arthur was reluctant to leave him in charge of Camelot on his own (The Lovers, 0:48). But despair over Gwain’s actions finally drive him over the edge, and Mordred goes on a murder spree (bet Gwain wasn’t expecting that, now was he–). And it speaks on the Saxon’s kinship with Mordred that they don’t blame him for the death and slaughter of one of their own, even though it would have been easy for them to point fingers – especially considering he promised to protect them “with [his] dying breath” (Skin and Bone, 2:28). Of course, didn’t want him to promise them his life, it’s implied that that wouldn’t mean much to them anyways, but the intent is there, but it could have still been considered a broken promise, a point of conflict. It could have been the point where the Saxon turned on Mordred – instead he goes off the rails to avenge them.

Not really related to anything, but during Peacemaker, when Gwain sings “oh Peacemaker,”, you can here overlapping vocals calling out the same lyrics, similar to the way the Saxon sing during Skin and Bone; together, united (ignore how ineloquent this is I am tired and stressed). I like to imagine that it’s them calling out to Mordred for help (:

I don’t remember where I was going with this But! the Saxon put a lot of trust into Mordred!

In Skin and Bone, the Saxon are never just sung by one person; the vocals of multiple different people singing overlap, or their lyrics are split between the two singers. To me at least this implies a greater trust – that it’s not just one Saxon who has chosen to trust Mordred and convinced the other 200 who follow him to Camelot to do so as well. And 200 isn’t a small number – that’s two hundred, that’s a lot of people, each who decided they believed in Mordred and his cause enough to put themselves in an incredibly vulnerable position for a cause they don’t even seem to really believe is possible (see: Skin and Bone. They’re incredibly skeptical). As we’ve already established, the Saxon probably have incredibly poor day-vision; meeting outside of Camelot in the middle of the day would make them essentially blind, like walking around without your glasses. Not only that, but it’s not an area they would know well – and would only be even semi-familiar with it in the dark. The people of Camelot have the higher ground, so to speak, and with the meeting place’s close proximity to Camelot, it would be safe to assume the Saxon would be outnumbered, like they were said to be (Judgment, 1:18). On top of that, the Saxon use their seax knives or other similar short-range weapons. The weapon of choice for the people of Camelot, however, is guns – long-range weapons. The people of Camelot don’t need to get close to the Saxon to injure or kill them in the same way the Saxon would need to, should a fight break out. Mordred, as both the ambassador of Camelot and the Saxon, is making a high-stakes promise. So that such a high number of people believe him capable of upholding it… there’s a lot of trust, there.

That’s all the coherent words I’m capable of stringing together that isn’t just feral screeching so. In conclusion. Mordred and the Saxons are family fucking fight me.

tada-

...I’m a sucker for found family okay mordred being collectivley adopted by the saxon gives me L I F E

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muqingsleftnut · 1 year

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Tag game!! Thankyou @theancientwonder for tagging me, I love these thingies!!

Last song I listened to: 'Up from a dream' by HAIM, in a bit of a cleaning mood and upbeat stuff is a vibe for that

Currently watching: I'm watching a few things atm, I'm slowly watching the 13th season of 'archer' with my Dad and I'm on I think the third season of 'Love is War' with my brother. And the past few days I've been rewatching the 'Captain America' movies.

Currently reading: I'm like a quarter way through 'Personal Writings' by Albert Camus. Kinda not really reading it at the moment cause of Uni and just a general lack of motivation but I did start it a few weeks ago and I intend to finish reading it at some point- I've also been reading 'Horimiya' I'm on the 11th volume but same thing, haven't really picked it up in a while.

Current obsession: Marvel comics/MCU, particularly Bucky Barnes (The winter soldier). He's just so badass and I love a character that has been both an antagonist and protagonist. Unfortunately I haven't the money to buy any comics (like I've done with my Harley Quinn and nightwing obsessions) however I do have a Pinterest board and I got a folder of edits and character analyses on YouTube and tiktok. I do love a good video essay!!

I don't have any other mutuals to tag aside from @deepeststrawberrymoon who's already been tagged by @/theancientwonder so get double-tagged ig! Peer pressure! Not really though, you never have to anything don't want to. I hope you're both well!!

#tag game #Thankyou bestie for the tag!!

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oh-meow-swirls · 2 years

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things that make 3 the best game:

lots of cool features added. the crank-a-kai system in 3 is better than in 1 and 2 (though also the darts suck), the new yo-kai searching minigame thingie is neat, the yo-kai vacuum cleaner is nice and the yo-kai drill and yo-kai blaster add unique mechanics (the drill leads to neat secrets), i could probably go on.

all of the new characters are great. as is to be expected nate's bbq classmates/friends n hailey's classmates are pretty underdeveloped but they seem neat from what we see of them. and of course, hailey n buck are the stars of the show here. they're both great n make both stories equally fun. usapyon's also great, i KNOW he debuted in blasters but his personality is extremely different there- the weakest of the new characters are probably blunder n folly since they basically don't do anything for the whole game except inexplicably act like they're plot important when they're not but even they can be neat n there's funni comedy with them at least.

blasters t is fun. it's hell but it's fun.

the story's great too. there being two different stories for most of the game is a really interesting idea, though it can also be annoying if you want to progress one story but can't because you need some fancy that! issue you get in hailey's story as nate or something dumb like that. why's all the story linking hailey doing things n then getting stuff done as nate i only just realized that what the fuck. anyways.

there's soooooo much content. both in the main game and the post-game. the main game alone took me like, a week to complete, whereas my playthroughs of 1 and 2 take like, four days at most (2 has added time from grinding for dame dedtime so ignoring that). and i'm STILL going through the post-game. there's so many post-game quests and other fun things you can do, like going to bbq as hailey (which is useless. she can't go on the raft or do zombie night or anything. she's limited in things she can do in bbq but nate can do everything in springdale) n also just the stuff you'd expect from yo-kai watch's post-game.

did i mention that hailey n buck are amazing n that i love them. best yo-kai watch characters apart from jibanyan.

oh also nate, hailey n buck being besties is amazing. nate getting friends who can also see yo-kai n who aren't his dead grandpa is great good for him he deserves it.

i can't decide if the length is good or bad. i guess i already mentioned how long it is. i have like 100 hours of playtime and i've only finished two blasters t dungeons what will my playtime be like once i finish blasters t and the post-game and everything-

nate, hailey n buck being besties is so great that it gets to be a bullet point twice over. they're so fucking stupid together i love them. there is a single braincell n nate n buck share it n hailey never gets it.

oh also hailey high-key has adhd n autism i made a whole essay about that. the points were like. 1. her interests are v intense (like hyperfixations/special interests). 2. she's v hyper seemingly both physically n mentally (the h in adhd stands for hyperactivity so). n 3. she is seemingly not very great at socializing but also idk how much of that's actually canon n how much of it is me projecting sdklfjklfsdjfds-

i mean i feel like you could make some sort of argument for most yo-kai watch characters being neurodivergent in some shape, way or form. though i'm saying this as a neurodivergent person who ends up headcanoning like every character i like as neurodivergent n has no idea how neurotypicals work so- i high-key accidentally made katie neurodivergent in my rewrite ngl i've just accepted it at this point.

#puppy rambles #yo-kai watch #yw3 #how much of this is a shitpost vs not? idk you tell me #if you couldn't tell i like hailey n buck slkdfjkdflsjfkljfds #wish there was more of nate hailey n buck being dumbasses together in the post-game #four or smth chapters of it isn't enough #the post-game's dumbassery between them is just like. during the tower of zenlightenment #n that's really only during the first time you do it seemingly-#i tried it a second time n there was basically no dialogue #it was really boring-#maybe there's just less dialogue if you play as nate fsdjfdkjsflkfsjd

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thedeadthree · 2 years

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🖊🖊 + Hinata and Nadezdha 👀

HIIII MARI ANGEL <3 I hope ur doing well and had a lovely day/holiday!!!! THOSE ARE MY GIRLIESS <3 i missed them sm u know? i also FINALLY at last finished edgerunners (i started it a bit back and finished it at like 4am this morning asjknkd so good oh my god IT HURTT but it was the loveliest u know?) and i missed the babies <3

SEND A 🖊 + I WILL GUSH ABOUT MY OCS

🖊 - so funny story, but the man that hinata and oda were sent to zero on behalf of her great grandpops s*aburo..... was actually the man who ordained their wedding sansknksd. SO he was a priest right and one popular with the corpos that were employed by 'saka in NC. well, he started speaking ill of the company and selling company intel to their rivals when the employees would go to confession. so like..... he had to go u know? blah blah talk ill of the corp u get zeroed etc etc. they devised a genius plan to have him marry them, when she says "you may kiss the bride" they do of course buuuuut they also zero him in the process while he's distracted.. and they did just that! and it worked! hinata and oda yank out their mantis blades and the deed was done <3. every great wedding ends in someone getting flatlined right?

🖊 - so this second one will sort of be what i think in theory how she’ll be in phantom liberty? so if this is a post game thingy hideo (her charge and her and odas adopted son bc SOMEONE has to and it sure ain’t his brother yori sjzjhzhx) will be ceo as his brother is to step down and is put on house arrest in a time out bc of the coup ksjzjxhxh. if vika ends up having to take on ‘saka again it may mean that the besties turn into adversaries which would BREAK my heart but also be absolutely EHEM *nova* if the white widow and worlds coolest cyberninja faced off u know? ORR if it’s like during the main story i mean the besties in a spy thriller would so be siiiick u know? oda supporting the wife from the tower in the plaza like “thats my wife” ❣️😌 etc etc!

🖊 - YAY MARI U SAINT U I ADORE U SM I’ve been wanting to scream about her for literal years slzkxjxj she’s been around for a WHILE living in the head along with vika rent free with luxury room service <3 she was like a blob of like ✨vibes✨ like with the red aesthetic and the red hair for YEARS until i found the perfect fc and name? a little lore into her design color and symbolism is a HUUGE part of her character development and design? the way as growing up she wore a lot of neutrals and it was deliberate as she wished to be as out of sight as possible? then it was as if a switch flipped following a near depth experience in a deep dive into what was the pre data crash net. red is passionate it’s power it’s so much more and all what she wished to be. she became the red queen and faked her charismatic nature until she forgot where the old nadya ended and the red queen began. for the version of her she conveyed to the world and her true nature became one and the same. <3 lilith killed eve the day she became the red queen.

🖊 - OO okay this’ll be the fun one.. for this one we will be discussing! nadyas………. “lovers.” shes got three in her character arc that hold the most meaning to her both good and bad. those would be: y*orinobu (HUUGE) johnny (VERY) and r*ache (VERY and also painful!). if i for sure need to do a deep lore dive essay into the meaning of people in her life especially these three. but in essential the tropes to best depict them are for sure “mutual obsession inevitable downfall” for yori and nadya. “right person wrong time and rivals to lovers” for her and johnny. and! pain pain and suffering “tragic doomed lovers” for nadya and rachie <3

#teehehe i also get to test the new banners <3 BUT ANYWAYS TY FOR THE ASK AND FOR ASKING OF MY BABY #🌹: mari #d-vx #oc: hinata sanderson #oc: nadezdha sovin #leg.asks #leg.ocs #leg.txt #Ty ty dear and i hope ur doing well <3 #i need to do a lore post I need to do it soon or if y’all are interested in asking of her in this i sure can kajsjxhx #Bc we will be here a WHILEE delving into the significance and symbolism and lore behind her skzjjxx #i need to write it down bc it’s EXTENSIVE and yes like the totally normal person I am i have kept it safe in the old noggin kajsjzh #BUT ANYWAY I HOPE U ENJOY ME YELLING ABOUT THE BABIES i missed them ✨😖#no but like when he flatlines rachie a part of her died with him u know? so! painnnn!#but also right person wrong time for johnny blah blah it’s about red string of fate inevitable down fall for her and y*ori etc etc <3 #either way hinata will have fun in the new dlc and i am so excited to see what the game will throw at me for the besties <3 #SPY THRILLLERRRR THEY SAY?? im sold im so sold #it should also be noted that nadya is one of the most prolific in her time and her Lilith sign in the net is regarded with divinity in the #net <3 rachie programmed all the daemons to have her signature in their code so they’ll never hurt her hehe <3 even the rogue ais see her as #one of their own <3 #hinata and o*das wedding was both iconic and deadly and nothing could have been more perfect for them <4 #*<3 #they’re the icons they’re the moment etc etc i love them both <3 #GODD THE NEW BANNERS CAME OUT SO CUTE ✨😖💌💌🥀

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altraviolet · 2 years

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6 8 9 (in TEG) and 13 please!

6) Have you written any fanfictions featuring OCs? If so, elaborate!

"Face The Past" is set in Iacon after the war [if you remember in MTMTE when Mirage left the LL to go to Cybertron, this fic takes place after he lands. he and First Aid go to Flatline]. There are two Camien immigrant OCs: Solarray and Flashflux. They're both female, conjunxed. Solarray is a satellite and Flashflux is a plane.

Solarray's description: The Camien who answered [the door] was very, very thin and pale yellow, with large blue panels on her delicate limbs and sprouting from her back. A few shocks of orange and magenta were scattered around her body. She had a blue visor and a mask.

Flashflux's description: As soon as they entered the bedroom, Flashflux's field hit Mirage, adding an extra dimension to her affliction he sorely did not wish to experience. It spat out bitter pain and agony. He pulled his own field even tighter to himself. Flashflux lay on the berth, a powerful aerial type, blue, with heat shimmering off her. There were huge holes in the wall above her where her wings had struck it. She gripped the berth and kicked her legs. Pale blue liquid seeped from the corner of her mouth.

"Cone" sort of contains an OC... you'll have to read it to see >D [there's a minor character in Echo Garden who alludes to his past and it's this fic, hehehe]

I can't think of any other OCs at the moment.

8) What kind of document do you use to you write? Microsoft Word? Google Docs? Straight in the AO3 text box?

tl;dr I use OpenOffice and I recently purchased Scrivener. I'll use Scrivener for future fics, but I'm scared to move Echo Garden into it in case some kind of irreparable singularity forms. I have a post with more info about my software and how I use it if you'd like more details! LINK.

9) What’s your favorite line(s) or scene(s) that you have written?

Oh man ok, I will fully admit that I make myself laugh when I write. I'm honestly too tired to find the direct quotes/chapters so here are some moments I can recall:

-in the beginning of fic when Soundwave is in the med bay with Ambulon, and Ambulon says something like "Kind of like how you and me are different" and looks at Soundwave's longass arms. He says/does this cuz he is a leg, lol

-Soundwave's holoavatar is a xenomorph [and he went around attacking the other holoavatars until he got kicked out of the party]

-Soundwave laughing at the data pad with rounded corners. It was the first time he grossly broke character in the fic. The moment stands out. Also, this is a very very long... what's the term? Long-thingy joke. The reason why he laughed will be revealed in a future chapter. It's the kind of thing people will either love or hate, and either way I think it's hilarious >D

-the scene at the end of Enceladia, when SW and Rodimus take the selfie together. It's the first solid hint towards what the damn relationship tag spoiled

-the fact that Ultra Magnus has a Precision Manufacturing Club and a 'courtesy chair,' which is a large plush chair he straps people into so they can beat their heads against it instead of the machinery

-Toaster is what the kids would call a gremlin and I kinda love him. I'm really proud that people got to like him, especially after I made him so annoying. Same for Aquafend. I had a goal to make readers empathize with him even after he was such an antagonist.

-so many more but so tired can't think

-a few scenes we haven't gotten to yet, but have been written for years

-THE LAST LINE OF THE FIC. It's also been written for years. Like the rounded corners joke, people will either like it or be meh, I feel. But I'm so excited to finally get there. It makes everything kinda go "oh." It's the kind of thing your English teacher would make you write a short essay on. The fic is full of narrative circles and... well I won't say too much, but... yeah, I hope when people read it, they feel a sense of something big having just finished, but not ended.

Thanks so much for the ask! =)

#justroddydraws #ask #writer ask meme #long post #echo garden related

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namuneulbo · 4 months

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week one hundred and thirty three

half of this week was just spent on writing the essay. i finished it on thursday and it's so weird not having anything to do. no summer job either. just pure nothingness until the fall term begins. i've been playing a lot of gta v in my spare time. i'm not going to act like i don't love it though. i'm so lucky i took out my student loan so i'm able to survive without support during the summer months.

on tuesday i went on my first proper run of the summer (year... but let's say summer because that's not technically wrong either... even though i guess it is since it's still may). i couldn't run very far before i had to start walking but i went on another one the next day and i was able to push myself ever so slightly more. i also saw a deer for the first time!!! there are a bunch of them around here apparently so i'm excited to see them more often. i saw one on both of my runs this week. they're so cute, it's insane.

saw josé gonzález on saturday. such a cozy concert. it's my first ever concert where it's truly quiet when the artist performs and i get to just stand there and take it in. it was so nice. i got barricade as well. love josé, what a guy!

also, sad news. had to take out my lobe piercing today. i had three holes but the third one just wouldn't heal and i went to a piercer today and they just said the last one had done a bad job and shouldn't have pierced it at an angle even if it was for aesthetic reasons. they said i should take it out and then i can repierce it in about a month so i'm most likely doing just that! might do my snakebites then too.

dating life update too, of course. i have THREE (3) upcoming dates. that's crazy. i wouldn't usually do that to myself. i like just talking to one person at a time and setting all my focus on that person but now i just happened to match with three people in a very short amount of time. first i matched with a guy. thin mustache and swaggy style, born and raised in söder... my sister's previously joked about how i just match with people in rich areas and at this point... anyways, we don't talk? like we talked sooooo briefly and he replied sooooo slowly so i just assumed it wasn't going anywhere and then he asked me out on a date? why is that a thing? like i get wanting to get peoples in-person vibe but THERE WAS NOTHING THERE??? i said yes to the date though, of course :) i really don't have high hopes for it and it was so weird planning it because he didn't even like reply quickly when planning it so we just sloooowly planned it over a few days. that should've been my queue to unmatch but i'd feel so mean. the date's today. at seven. so we'll see. he's cool, don't get me wrong, i think i however have noticed who i like the most of these three contestants.

then i was just swiping left on tinder a few days ago. the plan was just to swipe left on everyone until i found someone i liked and then stop so they wouldn't necessarily be removed from my radar but just... not matched so i could finish talking to the people i'm talking to now... you know? buuuuuut i got one of those secret admirer thingies and of course i checked and it was this really pretty girl. her profile was pretty empty. lots of cute pictures of her but barely any info apart from her music taste, which was quite solid. i usually wouldn't match with someone if we had zero of the same artists but i felt like her dad music with bob dylan and fleetwood mac would be okay. she asked me out really early on as well. i said yes and we planned out drinks and next week but no specific day and now we haven't really talked since so i don't know what'll happen... i feel like a douche for not sending anything to her but like... she doesn't reach out either and when i also have my eyes set on another person, i don't want to be the person leading it on. my plan right now is to see if she messages and if she does, i'll talk but if she doesn't, i'll allow it to cool down and not do the date. i just hate rejecting people so i'd rather have it naturally die down than having to later on reject her after a date i already knew the result of, you know? UGH, i sound so mean but trust me, i really don't like dating multiple people at once. it's stressful and i feel like a douche, even though i know it's normal.

okay... final date is with the canadian guy i mentioned last week. guys... he's so cute... okay, i was the person to ask him out. i usually would, like i mentioned before, ask them later on after talking actively for a week or two, but knowing i had two dates coming up and none of them were with him when he's the one i think about the most... felt wrong. i sound so sappy, god. i'm honestly just happy i'm able to like, look at other people again and be excited about meeting them and getting butterflies when they message me. it's my favorite feeling. butterflies are my favorite feeling.

a lot of my friends don't get why i like him or like... they probably do but they don't like his mustache but i don't care!!! i love massive and flashy staches. i still struggle with whatever the embarrassment thing is. i always feel embarrassed about the people i like and it feels so mean. like i literally will find someone hot but looking through their instagram or tiktok... cringefest. i can't do it. PLEASE, I DON'T KNOW WHAT CAUSES IT BUT IT'S SO ANNOYING BECAUSE I JUST FEEL LIKE A DOUCHE THAT LIKE SEES EVERYTHING WRONG WITH THEIR APPEARANCE OR SOCIAL MEDIA PRESENCE OR WHATEVER. i hate it. i'm quite shy so i don't know if that has anything to do with it? like am i just so shy that i'll blush and get embarrassed by seeing them on a picture? that feels fake. stop that pick-me shit. like... i like my men a little silly so why am i cringing at a silly picture? that's literally what my heart wants but my brain says "no, girl... he's just cringe". WHAT IS UP WITH THAT??? cringe culture is dead. i feel mean and i don't want to be mean.

anyways, he's really cute and i stand by that. my friends all think he looks really old... he's 22. turning 23 in a few months if that proves their point. girl. i do however get what they mean. i think facial hair ages a lot and he's just kind of hairy in general so i think that adds a few years to appearance?? i fuck with it though. i'm telling you, it's the most girlypop men who are like that. also, i will just get all the benefits of an older man who looks like he's got a wife and three kids and a mortgage to pay off (older being like... 35 in this case because i'm still a 19 year old, turning 20 in a few months, fucker) without actually having to date an old man. also queer with a good taste in music so i don't actually need that much more to be convinced. he's just my type hehe.

i asked him out and he immediately came with the suggestion to go for coffee so i guess were doing that. he asked if that was fine with me and i said yes and joked about how there would be less alcohol to get me talking more but that coffee will be good too. we have just decided a day but i think the activity is still up in the air. coffee or drinks. we'll see. coffee shits or forced dinner date at maccas because i start feeling sick from the drinks and need food (has happened).

but he's so cute. we also exchanged NUMBERS (and instas). NOBODY DOES THAT ANYMORE BUT I LOVE IT! IT FEELS WAY MORE INTIMATE. literally... when i dated l i had to download snap just to talk to him on something that wasn't instagram dms. i know it's just because he's canadian and from what i've heard snap is dying over there, but imessage is the superior messaging app. feels way more serious. also fun to add a little heart to his name in my phone hehe.

so um, you (random person or future me who's reading this) probably understand why i'm less thrilled about these other dates now... i'm not a douche oh my fucking god.

sotw: twenty one pilots - navigating

#namuneulbo #diary #tumblr diary #diary blog #online diary

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alternateanonymous · 1 year

Text

5.18, 11:10, Just another day in the life of me

What’s up. So honestly, I don’t even feel like writing right now but I am because I am trying to help encourage Stefan to jounral more. Haha. But yea, so we are doing pretty good. I honestly don’t remeber what my last post was but I know that it wasn’t anything very good. I think it was something that was pretty bad, but I just want to update you and tell you that everything is ok. We are doing really good. Like he is loving me really well and we are vibing really hard so that is really good. Of course he still has his issues but its ok because I am here to help him. Obviously I have another jounral that i write in but that shit is addressed to stefan so everything that i don’t want him to really see i write here. It’s not like I don’t want him seeing it, its more of a respect thing for myself. It was a good day today though. this morning I woke up and finished writing a giant law paper that I had to do, so that was good. I actually had a really good time writing it so that was good. I then took a shower and then went to a coffee meeting time with one of my teachers. Mr. Porto. She was really cool to talk with and I learned alot about her, it was honestly just nice to talk to her. I like talking to different people. Then after that me and muhsin went to get some food. Oh also, I’ve been having some crazy nose bleeds lately. it hasn’t been good Oh yesturday me and stefan fell asleep in his common room which wasn’t very good and unsolicited but it’s ok. I woke up and had the worst bloody nose Ive ever had. shit was flowing really badly like from both sides which wasn;t good. Today i felt just the slightest bit woosy beause i lost all that blood but also because i am eating like shit which is completly my fault. It’s ok. these things happen. but then we went to this k nutrition place which was good. Saw this girl that I haven’t seen in a while, her name is marissa jacobsen and is p cool. we had food and it was nice. muhsin’s kinda been getting on my nerves today just because hes being mad annoying. Mainly because i had my roomate meeting today and i didn’t really wanna talk about it cuz it was kinda annoying and i jusst didn’t really wanna deal with it and you know muhsin, he just like to talk in circles about the same shit in a really laughable and stupid way, that kinda just made me annoyed and like bro stfu but I didn’t which is fine lol. But yea, also he just gets under my skin which is annoying. But when these things happen, he doesn’t and instead i become really bitter and sarcastic and that gets under his skin. hahaha. off, it’s like that sibling dynamic for real lol. I had the roomate agreement thingy. it was really easy and lasted like 5 minutes but i literally held the whole conversation and made it really easy for everyone. My gremlin of a roomamte is leaving on my birthday which is in 3 days, so great birthday present, but also yayyyy. Hopefully i will never have to see that bitche ever again in my entire life lol. I basically said I am fine with not having any guests over, cuz it is what like a few more days until we get out of school. But since she is leaving even earlier then yayyyy i get the room to myselffff whooo hoooo. But yea, so she didn’t even say anything and I tried to be as accomodating and open as possible. maybe a little to kiss ass but at the end of the day i am just trying to save my ass. it is what it is. then after that, i hang out with muhsin working on a general outline foir my final film essay which me stefan and mushin all wanted to work on tonight which was good. Took like forever to actually get to the film. Muhsin wanted to find his room for next year so he wandered the damn halls and i sat with stefan. Then muhsin finally did show up but then we were hungry and ordered wings. so then we just continued to work on the outline while we waited. the food came and then we ate and finally watched the movie. the movie was really good it was an alfred hitchock film called vertigo and was pretty good. it was an old movie but had a very intresting plot. I’d honestly love to make another movie like it but kinda modernify it. I think it would be really good. I feel like the film encapsulated human emotion and perspection really well. Sometimes people gaslight themselves and do really stupid shit without realizing it and maybe they do btu just continue to do it because they can’t do anything else and are falling victim to their weakness. So yea. But then throuhgout the whole movie we were all talking and shit about the film, muhsin was getting on my nerve a little bit because me and stefan were working on an outline and basically said if muhsin wanted access to it he had to work on it. We gave him access and he didn’t do shit so i kicked him off the document and he was all crusty about that shit, but it was his fault lol. Also, he was trying to convince me to lie about who stefan wa if he was brought up in the roomamte agreement but honestly fuck that. Lying is never a good option, it just was flabbergasting to me because i think muhsin actually belived that what he was telling me was a good idea which was really stupid because it clearly wasn’t lol. sometimes i think this kid is retarted lol. muhsin and stefan are both more autistic than me because we took an autism quiz and they both got over double my score which was jfunny. anyway i’ll see you later, we are done texting loll, byeeeee. 11:27pm

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f4irycafe · 3 years

Note

i major in literature and im blk!! so ur lil drabble thingy abt history major famous gamer bf!eren x english and philosophy major black!reader makes me so HAPPY! i have sum headcanons to share baby <3

nsfw warning!

eren first meets u in the library, ur all stressed nd pouty over ur english essay due in a few days time, and you have to finish it now otherwise ur screwed

and after frequent meetings in the library, ur friends!!

although eren always wanted to fuck ur dumb lil brains out!

he thinks your adorable- ur little skirts and thigh highs, ur pretty butterfly locs, and the cropped tops that always showed the swell of ur tits <3 he thinks ur so gorgeous

he loved ur smarts too, armin would always brag abt you as you both went to the same philosophy class, and u and armin were always tied top place- full marks in all ur tests

eren just wants you so. bad.

i don’t have the time to write somethin detailed based off of this but yes. and he’s not the type who’d be all “oh she must be stupid cause she dresses like a slut”, he thinks your outfits are the CUREST THING EVER.

and if ARMIN IS BRAGGING ABOUT YOU, he basically already had the approval of one of his friends, and for him that’s a big deal. he’s totally be all flustered if he asked you out. he knew how smart you were and didn’t wanna embarrass himself.

“i - uh - i was wondering if,”

and you’re just staring at him with a cute lil smile on your face waiting for him to ask you out.

“if i wanted to go on a date with you? yeah.” you said.

“yeah …. what?”

“yes i’ll go on a date with you.”

“how did you-,” you look over at armin quickly, and eren follows your gaze, cursing to himself.

he’s so cute <3

#f4irycafeblurbs📇#eren x black reader #eren x reader #eren jeager headcannons #eren jaeger #aot x reader #eren cafe <3

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lilliagradiewrites · 4 years

Text

go get her, kid. (peter parker)

Summary: Peter Parker is hopelessly in love with Tony Starks’ teenage daughter, and Stark encourages him to shoot his shot.

WC: 7.4k (holy shit)

Warnings: Bad language, , really nothing else. A lot of cute peter and a painful amount fluff. A tiny bit of angst too.

A/N: I found myself watching Tom Holland interview clips today and I just couldn’t help myself. Here we are: my first peter parker/ spiderman one shot! I have some Harry and Jj pieces in the works, so keep eyes out for that!

LET’S DO IT!!!

--------

Peter found himself in this position far too often. Staring at you shamelessly while you worked away at whatever was on your desk, usually a school assignment or some tech project. His crush had been going on for quite some time, but it was getting more and more difficult to hide.

You and Peter had been best friends ever since your dad first recruited him. Something clicked between the two of you, causing an instant friendship. As time went on, you grew closer and closer to the superhero, and he quickly became your best friend. You began surrounding yourself with his friends without even realizing it, becoming close with Ned and MJ almost instantly. They were great people, and you loved being around them, but something about Peter was just different. Your energies matched perfectly for some reason. He got your humour, liked the same things as you, plus he was a great conversationalist and an even better listener. Some of your favorite memories were made with Peter.

Despite knowing practically everything about the boy, you were completely oblivious about his huge crush on you. Ned was the only person who truly knew, though many other people had their suspicions. The Avengers had an idea about it, considering you were what he talked about 90 percent of the time. MJ could tell because of the way he looked at you. When he looked your way, his pupils enlarged, his cheeks went pink, and the look on his face was entirely lovey-dovey. It was so obvious just in the way he gazed at you when you spoke.

He was looking at you in that way now, though you weren’t aware. He was meant to be studying (it was the whole reason he came over to your house, or at least that’s the reason he told you), but he couldn’t bring himself to care about chemistry homework when you looked so damn beautiful. Your hair was pulled back into a low ponytail keeping it away from your face as you worked. Your hands flew across the keyboard on your laptop, typing out something Peter probably wouldn’t understand. He was smart, sure, but you were intelligent in a different way. You were insightful and observant, you got things other people couldn’t begin to process. Your brain understood things in a different capacity than most. Peter assumes you got this trait from your father, who was the exact same way.

“What’re you typing? Something for school?”

You nodded, your attention not wavering from the laptop screen. “Yeah, an assignment for AP Lit.”

“Oh, that one project you told me about? With the essay and the powerpoint?”

You nodded again. “Mhm.”

Peter furrowed his brows, moving off your bed to come stand near you at your desk in an attempt to get a better look at what you were working so eagerly on. “I thought that project wasn’t due for another month.

“It’s not. I had an idea for the essay, and I figured if I get started early, I have more time to edit and perfect it.”

“You’re such a perfectionist.” Peter says with a light chuckle, looking at the state of your desk. It was both chaotic and organized at the same time. Pens, highlighters, pieces of paper, a book with annotations scribbled in the margins, notebooks with neat class notes printed inside of them in your pretty handwriting. They were all scattered about the surface, but Peter knew you well enough to know that there was always a method to your madness. As you observed longer, he realized that all of the items were in different sections on your desk, based on categories and subjects. He smiled lightly, realizing that this messy but technically neat surface was probably a very accurate representation of what goes on in your mind.

You finished the paragraph you were typing with a flourish, a satisfied smile resting on your lips. “There. I have a basic outline done for the essay portion. Obviously, I’ll have to go back and add a little more and elaborate on the points, but the basics are there.”

Peter glanced up at your laptop screen. His eyes were met with a never ending sea of typed out words. He smiled; this was so you. Your ‘outline’ is another student's essay doubled.

“You’re gonna write more than that?”

You looked back at him, and he saw your face for the first time during the encounter. His cheeks went slightly pink at the sight of you, and he prayed that you didn’t notice.

You didn’t, or perhaps you just didn’t say anything. You continued on with the conversation without skipping a beat, and relief washed over Peter because of this.

“Of course I am.” You stated with furrowed brows, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “This is so boring and basic, and has no detail whatsoever. Anybody who reads the summary of the book online could write this. I want my teacher to know that I thoroughly read and understood the novel, you know? I don’t want to submit some surface-level shit, I want to really pick apart the undertones of and the meaning behind the story.”

Peter nods, pretending to understand what you meant. He’d barely been paying attention to the words you were saying, too encapsulated with your beautiful eyes to do so. You turned back around towards your work, causing your best friend to snap out of his trance-like state.

“Do you wanna watch a movie or something? I’m bored.”

You had now picked up a pencil and a highlighter, working on the chemistry notes he was supposed to be taking. “Don’t you have work to do, Pete?”

“...No.”

You paused your writing to gaze at him skeptically.

“So you did your book report for english?”

“Yes.”

“Your worksheets for pre-calc?”

“Mhm.”

“You read the assigned chapters for Pschycology and finished the quiz you had to take on them?”

A nod was your only answer.

“What about chem? We have notes, essay questions, assigned reading, and a formulas worksheet due next tuesday. Have you done all of that?”

Peter hesitated for a moment. “Yes, I have.” It was a clear lie. “Can we watch a movie now?”

“There’s no way you did all of that. Go finish your work, and then we can watch a movie.”

A groan escapes Peters lips as he turns, resting against your desk. “But that’ll take forever. Your dad kicks me out at 11:00. We’ll never have time to watch one.” He whines.

You smile slightly, unable to fight it. Not replying to your friend, you spin around in your chair, raising your voice slightly, “FRIDAY, connect to dad please.”, the command directed to nowhere in particular.

“Connecting to Mr. Stark.” The familiar robotic voice echoes throughout your room.

“What’s up, Y/N/N?”

“Hey, Dad? Can Peter stay a bit later tonight?”

“Why?” Your dad’s voice replies through a hidden speaker, his tone almost accusatory.

“Because he wants to watch a movie but I won’t let him until we’re done with homework. We won’t have enough time to finish the movie if he leaves at normal curfew? Pleeeaseee, Dad?”

You can hear your father sigh. “Fine, but only because it’s not a school night and I’m feeling generous. He’s gotta be gone by one though, no exceptions.”

Both of you smiled widely, and you erupted in cheers. “Thanks, Dad!”

“Kid, be ready for training at eight. A later curfew doesn’t mean an exception from your early morning saturday sessions.” The statement was directed at Peter, who nodded, despite your father not being able to see him.

“Got it, Mr. Stark.”

“FRIDAY, disconnect.” You heard Tony’s voice from the other side.

“Disconnected.” The sound of the AI confirming the command filled your room, and the space fell into a brief silence once again.

You spun in your chair, turning to face Peter with a smug smile on your face. “There, now we can get our work done, and watch a movie. Satisfied?”

Peter nodded, giving a roll of his eyes and heading back over to his workspace on your bed, plopping down and continuing his assignments.

An hour and half later, Peter gave a heavy sigh, finally closing his textbook with a smile. “All done!” he announced proudly.

“With everything?”

“Yes, everything.”

You closed your notebook you’d been working in, standing up. “Great. I’ve been done for half an hour, I’ve been working on future assignments while I waited for you to finish up. Ready to watch that movie?”

Peter nodded excitedly. He loved watching movies with you, because you always cuddled up close to him on your bed while you watched. Peter loved being in close proximity to you, even though it made him a little nervous.

“What do you wanna watch?” He asked, beginning to clear his things off your bed.

“I don’t know. We can discuss while we go make popcorn.”

Peter’s eyes lit up; he loved popcorn.

“Okay!” He tossed the rest of his things in his school bag, zipping it up quickly and dropping it in the corner of your room. “Lets go!”

You chuckled at his childlike behavior, following him out of your bedroom door towards your kitchen. The entire journey down the stairs, down the hall, and to the kitchen was filled with Peter going on and on about movies he wanted to see.

You grabbed the microwave popcorn from the pantry, unwrapping it and tossing it in, starting up the machine.

You continued to listen to Peter as soft popping sounds filled your kitchen.

“Oh, you guys have Disney plus, right? What if we watched that new star wars show thingy? The mandalorian?”

You smiled at this statement. Though you didn’t see the boy in any way but a friend (at least that’s what you told yourself), you found Peter’s Star Wars obsession very cute.

“I mean, I would watch that, but I don’t think I’d understand it.”

Peter’s brows furrowed. “Why not?”

“Because I’ve never seen the movies.”

You watched in amusement as Peter’s jaw dropped, his eyes widening in shock. “You’ve NEVER seen the Star Wars movies? Are you kidding me, Y/N?”

You laughed at his reaction, moving to fetch the fully popped popcorn from the microwave and transfer it into a bowl. “No, I’m not kidding. I’ve been meaning to watch them forever, but I guess I never got around to it.”

“I can’t believe this!” Peter exclaims in disbelief. “We’ve been friends for a year and a half now, and you’ve never seen the Star Wars movies? This is insane! I talk about them so much… did you just never understand what I was talking about?”

You shook your head, chuckling. “Nope, I never have. I kinda just let you talk about it, because I planned on watching the movies. I figured I’d understand what you meant when I watched them.”

“Holy shit… we’re watching the first one tonight, Y/N. No arguments, we’re doing it.”

You grabbed the now prepared bowl of popcorn, smiling at your friend. “Alright, let’s do it.”

You headed back up the stairs, the sound of your footsteps accompanied with the sound of Peter murmuring in disbelief as you made your way to your room.

Once the two of you arrived at your destination, you closed the door, placing the bowl of popcorn on your still cluttered desk.

Peter climbed into your bed, while you rummaged through your drawers in search of comfy clothes. “I’m gonna change into pj’s before we start, i want to be comfy.”

Peter nodded. “FRIDAY, put Star Wars: The Phantom Menace on Y/N’s TV.” He spoke out in a slightly raised voice. The movie appeared on your screen, waiting to be started as you changed.

A few moments later, you emerged from your bathroom, now wearing a pair of Nike shorts and a slightly oversized t-shirt.

“Y/N, this is about to change your li-” Peter’s voice trailed off as he looked at you. The oversized shirt you were wearing… was his.

He choked on the piece of popcorn he’d been eating. “I-is that my shirt?”

You looked down on what you were wearing, realizing that it was, in fact, Peter's. “Oh shit. Yeah, sorry. You left it at the lab once, dad gave it to me to give to you, and I guess it just got mixed in with my clothes. I’ll wash it and give it back.

Peter shook his head, coughing again. “No, it’s okay. You can keep it. It looks better on you anyway.” his cheeks went pink as he realized what had just left his mouth. He hadn’t meant to say the last part.

Your cheeks went even pinker at the compliment, which you couldn’t deny made your stomach flutter a little bit. “Okay, thanks.” You smiled at your friend, climbing into the bed beside him. You cuddled in close to him, probably closer than need be, but Peter didn’t seem to mind.

“FRIDAY, start the movie.”

---

A few hours later, the credits were rolling, and Peter was red in the face. You had fallen asleep halfway through the movie, and had moved even closer to him in your slumber. You were now full-on cuddling the boy, and he had no idea what to do. Your leg was moved over his, your head lay on his chest. One arm thrown around his waist. He liked having you this close, but his stomach was in a constant state of butterflies, and he was worried that the sound of his heart beating loudly in his chest would wake you.

He didn’t know what time it was, but it must’ve been close to one, because a knock sounded from the other side of your bedroom door.

Without waiting for an answer, Tony entered the room. “Alright, kids, it’s almost curfew, time to wrap it up…”

His eyes landed on you and Peter, cuddled up in your bed.

“Kid, what the hell is going on here?”

“Mr. Stark! Um, Y/N fell asleep while we were watching the movie and she kinda… I don’t know.. Ended up like this? Nothing’s going on, I swear, it’s just… I didn’t want to wake her up…”

Peter’s face was the color of a tomato at this point. Stark still had his suspicions about the boy’s intentions, but had a feeling that Peter was telling the truth. “Alright, then. You’d better get your ass home and get some sleep. Like I said, you don’t get a free pass from training because you were cuddling with my daughter till one am.”

Peter’s eyes went wide. “No, Mr. Stark, I- We weren’t… I Wasn’t…”

Stark chuckled at the boy’s flustered state. “I’m screwing with you, Kid. Now get the hell out of my house. I’ll see you at 8 AM sharp at the compound”

Peter nodded frantically. “Yes, sir. 8 AM. Got it.”

Tony turned and left without another word, leaving Peter slightly panicked. Did Mr. Stark think that something was going on between him and Y/N? Would he be mad if there was? Peter didn’t know what to think, but he knew that he should probably leave before Tony decided to come back.

Peter climbed carefully out from underneath Y/N, setting her head gently on her pillow. He tried his very best not to wake her as he moved out of the bed.

“Goodnight, Y/N. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? Love you lots.” Peter whispered to his ‘best friend’, planting a sweet kiss on her forehead. With that, he slid your window open, climbing out of it and swinging his way home.

Peter was completely oblivious to the fact that Tony had been standing quietly outside your door when Peter said his goodbyes, and Tony saw the entire encounter. The ‘goodnight’, the ‘i love you’, the sweet forehead kiss.

Tony had his suspicions, but that night it was confirmed: his newest recruit had it bad for his daughter.

Strangely, Tony didn’t find himself terribly angry over it.

The next morning, you awoke to the sound of your alarm blaring frustratingly loud. You groaned at the noise, picking up your phone to turn it off. The time on your phone screen read 7:00 AM. Groaning again, you pulled yourself reluctantly out of bed. As much as you hated getting up out of bed, you knew you had to if you ever wanted to complete your training. Your father had promised you that you’d get a spot on his team if you trained hard enough, and you were extremely determined. It had been your dream for years to become an Avenger, so you had been training your ass off for months to earn your spot.

This is how all of your Saturdays had begun for many weeks. An alarm going off at seven in the morning, waking you up to get ready for training at eight. It was a normal routine for you at this point, but for some reason the early wake up never got easier.

You moved about your regular morning routine, heading straight for your bathroom to brush your teeth and wash your face. Once your basic hygiene was done, you brushed through your hair, changed into some clothes (your training uniform was at the compound), grabbed your phone, and headed downstairs.

You made a beeline for the kitchen, where your father was already making his morning coffee. When he noticed your presence, he gave you a tired smile.

“Morning, Y/N/N. Sleep well?”

Still half asleep, you gave an exhausted nod. “I shouldn’t have stayed up that late last night. I’ll yell at Peter when I see him. He always manages to convince me to let him stay late.”

For some reason, your father gave a light chuckle at your words. “I bet he does, sweetheart.”

Your brows furrowed at his statement. Something about his tone of voice didn’t sit right with you. “What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask, making your way over to fix yourself a cup of coffee.

Your father smiled smugly at you, passing over the coffee pot and a mug. “Nothing, honey. Be ready in fifteen.”

Still suspicious, your eyes followed him as he placed his coffee mug in the sink and moved from the room. Why was he acting like this? Did Peter do something last night? You remembered falling asleep halfway through the movie, not being able to make it through the whole thing. Had something happened while you were sleeping?

Deciding not to let it bother you, you pushed the interaction from your mind, focusing solely on fixing your coffee. You were barely functional without it, and you knew you needed to be fully aware for training. You had to prove to your father that you could keep up with the Avengers, and that you’d be a useful asset to their team.

You downed the coffee quickly, knowing you had only a few minutes left to get ready. When your father gave you a time warning, he always meant it. And, you knew all too well, he would leave you behind if you were going to make him late.

He’d done it twice before.

Once you had finished chugging the remnants of your coffee, you placed the mug neatly in the sink, right beside where your father had left his. The drink had been an instant pick-me-up, and you automatically felt more awake. You found yourself getting more and more excited for the day ahead of you. Though waking up early on saturday mornings was a pain in the ass, you did enjoy training. You got to exercise, learn about cool technology, and screw around with your best friend. What wasn’t there to like?

Now that your best friend had crossed your mind, you pulled out your phone to text him. You sent him a message every morning, or he sent one to you. It was just a thing the two of you did. Over the past year the two of you had been close, it became some sort of routine.

Y/N/N: morning spidey. u awake?

Within moments, he was typing out a reply. He always answered your messages quickly.

Spidey: yes i am :) ready for training? I’m gonna kick ur ass in sprints today

You chuckled lightly at his response. You and Peter had always been insanely competitive towards each other, and it really jumped out during training. Unfortunately for you, Peter usually won the challenges. You always blamed it on the fact that he had more experience and super strength; he blamed it on the fact that ‘you suck’ and ‘he’s just that awesome’.

Y/N/N: u can try, but idk how that will work out. I’ve beaten u in all of the other sprints for weeks.

Spidey: doesn’t matter. I’m showing out today

Spidey: bring ur a-game, irongirl.

You smiled at the message.

Y/N/N: always do, spiderboy

He started typing back immediately, and you knew exactly why. He called you irongirl to screw with you, so you had begun calling him spiderboy to get on his nerves. It worked every time.

Spidey: Y/N!!! It’s spiderman!!!

Y/N/N: spiderboy!!! It’s nova!!!

Spidey: ugh. Ur impossible.

You grinned widely. Your playful banter with Peter has always been one of your favorite parts of the friendship.

Y/N/N: but u love me anyways :)))) see u soon

Spidey: u better be glad i do. see u soon

You reread the texts, unable to fight the smile on your face. Everytime you interact with Peter, you remember how much you truly love him. Being an avenger, and the daughter of one of the smartest and most famous men on the planet, wasn’t easy. Peter was the only one who had a taste of the madness that was your life. Having him around was having a sense of normalcy, and so were incredibly grateful for him.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of your voice being called from the front door of your house.

“Y/N! Time to leave!” Without hesitation, you locked your phone, slipping it into the pocket of your sweatpants.

You hurried towards the front door, not wanting to be left behind again. When you arrived, your father was already standing there, holding the door open. You gave him a smile and a quick thank you for holding the door, then made your way out. The driver was already waiting patiently in front of your house. This was one of your dad’s six drivers.

“Morning, Bernard.” You say kindly to the driver, climbing into the back seat of the range rover. “How are you today?”

“I’m doing wonderful, Y/N. How are you?” The older man replied. You really liked Bernard, he was one of your favorite drivers. He was an older man, in his mid seventies, and you found him to be the sweetest person in the universe. Sometimes, he’d bring you your favorite candy when he used to pick you up from school, and he was always so considerate and kind.

“I’m good. Tired, but good.”

The man smiled at your reply. By this point, your dad had finished locking up the front door of the house, and he climbed in the backseat beside you.

“Good morning, Mr. Stark.” Bernard said professionally to his new passenger, and your dad nodded as a reply.

“Morning, bernard.”

The conversation ended there between the two men. Your father wasn’t a very social person with people he didn’t know, and Bernard was aware of this fact. He mostly talked to you when you were in the car, and Tony went on his phone and did Lord knows what.

“How is Dorothy doing? Is she feeling better?” You asked the man as he began pulling out of your driveway. Dorothy was Bernard’s wife, and she’d gotten sick the week prior. Given her age, Bernard was very worried about her.

Bernard smiled at your question. “Much, much better. They released her from the hospital yesterday, she’s back home and doing great. Thanks for asking.”

“Of course!” You grinned back. “Did you ever find out what she had?”

“Pneumonia, just a very bad case of it.”

You nodded in understanding. “Well, I’m glad she’s better! I was worried when you first told me.”

The conversation continued, talking about anything and everything as you drove to the compound. He told you about his wife, his four kids and what they’re doing. His granddaughter had a baby a few days before, and he was extremely excited about it.

After a 20 minute drive, you pulled up to the building you knew so well. Bernard went to the normal procedure of getting through the front gates, and then pulled up to the front of the compound.

“Well, here we are.” Bernard announced, parking the vehicle. You and your father began climbing out of the backseat.

“Thank you, bernard. Tell your granddaughter I said congratulations!”

He wished you a kind goodbye, and then you were gone, leaving the car and heading towards the compound.

When you walked into the main section of the building, you spotted your best friend in the kitchen. You had to admit, he looked incredible, standing near an open window in the early morning light. He was already dressed in his sleek, black training uniform. It was tight against his body, showing off his muscled body. Sometimes, you forget how beautiful Peter is.

“You’re staring…” A singsong voice came in your ear. You whipped your head towards the voice to see your father walking away from you, smirking. You stood there, feeling slightly confused. Had you really been staring at Peter?

At times, you forget that Peter is only your best friend. The two of you act like an old married sometimes. You spend all of your time together, and you know each other so well.

Strange feelings you couldn’t understand had crept up on you before, especially recently. You couldn’t deny Peter was attractive, and he was a great person, too. How could you not love him? The issue is, you found yourself loving him in a different way than before…

You shook your head, clearing your thoughts. You couldn’t be thinking about this right now, it’s not the place or time. Peter was standing right in front of you, and you needed to be focused for training.

You could process your feelings and emotions at a later time.

You began walking up to Peter, who was leaning up against the counter holding a cup of coffee.

“Morning, loser.” You said teasingly, greeting your friend. His head snapped in your direction, and he smiled when his eyes found you. (You thought you could see his cheeks go pink, too, but you forced yourself to ignore it.)

“Hey! How’d you sleep?”

“Pretty good.” You replied, leaning against the counter beside him. “I didn’t even notice that you left last night, I was really out. Did my Dad come in and tell you to leave?”

The pink in Peter’s cheeks darkened at your statement. Of course, this was the perfect time for your father to reenter the room. “Yeah, I did. He seemed very comfortable, but I kicked him out at one.”

Peter and your father were making direct eye contact. Your dad had that stupid smirk on his face, and peter was bright red.

You looked between the two of them, not knowing what to think. Before, you were just suspicious, but now it was confirmed: something happened last night between the two of them, and you were determined to find out what.

Hours later, you’re completely exhausted from training. You worked your ass off, and had successfully beat Peter in sprints.

“That’s right! You lost! How amazing is spiderboy now?”

Peter rolled his eyes in mock annoyance. “Whatever, Y/N. I let you win.”

Your jaw dropped. “You did not! I won because I’m better!”

Peter just smiled at you. You took a swig of the water bottle in your hands, turning around to look at your friend as you did.

The sight you were met with was very sweet. Peter stood there, smiling at you with a look you could only describe as adoration. You looked back at him, a small grin resting on your face.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” The brunette boy says cheekily.

“Why are YOU looking at ME like that, Parker?”

You took a step closer to him, his eyes widening slightly at your movement. He said nothing in response to your question (though it felt more like an accusation), and you smiled again.”Got nothing to say?” Your voice was barely a whisper.

“Parker!” You jumped what felt like 20 feet in the air at the sound of Natasha’s voice, breaking up the little moment between you and Peter.

You stepped back away from him, and you couldn’t help but notice the sadness flash across his face before he turned to the other woman in the room.

“Yeah, Nat?”

“Tony needs your help in the lab. I believe his exact words were ‘he needs to be here in five or I’ll kill him.’ A few minutes have already passed, I’d start running if I were you.”

Peter’s eyes widened for the second time. “Oh, shit, okay. Thanks, Nat.” He turned his head quickly in your direction. “I’ll meet you in your room when I’m done, okay?”

You nodded with a smile. Peter planted a quick kiss on your forehead before jetting off in the direction of the lounge.

Grinning to yourself, you turned towards the sink, your back facing Natasha. You begin cleaning out your now empty water bottle, thinking over the previous interaction with Peter. You loved when he kissed your forehead.

“So, how long have you liked him?” You were so deep in thought, Natasha’s voice made you jump once again. When you’d fully processed her words, your cheeks went pink.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Oh, don’t give me that. I know you like him.”

“Like who?” Play dumb. That’ll throw her off your trail… right?

“Peter! Come on, you’re caught. Just admit it, Y/n, you’re making things harder on yourself.”

Finally, you sighed. Drying your hands on a towel, you turned reluctantly back towards Nathasha. “Is it really that obvious?”

The woman broke out into a grin at your words. “Of course it is! You two are hopelessly in love with each other. It’s almost hard to watch.”

Your cheeks went pink at her statement. “With each other? Oh, no. You mean I’m hopelessly in love with him. It’s not mutual. I’m just his best friend.”

Nat rolled her eyes dramatically. “Oh, come on! ‘Just his best friend’ my ass. He loves you, Y/N. He’s even more obvious than you are.”

You shook your head quickly. “No, I promise you’re wrong.”

She looked at you pointedly. “I was right about you, wasn’t I?”

“Yes, but…” Your voice trailed off. You couldn’t argue with that. Nat grinned smugly at your reaction.

“That’s what I thought. Please confess to him when he meets you in your room later. It’s painful to watch, I can’t do it any longer.” And with that, Natasha was gone, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

Was it really thought obvious? Could everyone tell how you felt about peter? You could hardly even tell how you felt about him; the line between best friend and crush had been blurred for so long. If everyone could tell that you were hopelessly in love with your best friend, you would be incredibly embarrassed.

Even worse… what if Peter could tell that your in love with him?

You shook your head, as if clearing your thoughts. No. You couldn’t think like that. Of course he didn’t know; he would’ve said something.

Right?

Sighing, you walked off towards your room to take a shower, pretending you weren’t going to think of him while you were in there.

---

While Natasha was exposing your feelings, you were completely oblivious to the fact that Tony was doing the same thing to Peter in the lab.

When the boy walked in, Peter fully expected that he was being called for one of three reasons.

One: Tony had a new mission for Peter.

Two: Tony needed help with an experiment.

Or, three (the scariest option): Tony wanted to scold him for (albeit unintentionally) cuddling with his daughter the night before.

Peter could only be described as apprehensive as he walked carefully into the lab, where Tony was hunched over a table, working on something that Peter couldn’t see.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter spoke nervously, a timid way of letting Tony know of his presence. “Nat said you needed me. Is that true, or was she just trying to get rid of me?”

“No, no, I called for you.” Tony replied. He made a few last touches on whatever he was working on, then turned around towards peter. “I wanted to talk to you.”

Okay, option two is eliminated. Now, the question at hand is: will it be option one or three?

“Oh, okay. What about?” Peter said casually (or at least, that's how he hoped it came across.)

Tony gave a pointed look to the boy before speaking again. “My daughter.”

Peter’s eyes widened slightly.

Shit, shit, shit.

Option three it is.

“Is this about last night sir? I swear I can explain-” Peter was quickly speaking.

But, before he could finish, Tony was cutting him off.

“This isn’t about last night, kid. I mean, it kind of is, but not really.”

Peter’s brow furrowed.

Unknown option number four?

“What do you mean, sir?”

“I saw what happened before you left last night. The forehead kiss, the ‘I love you,’ all of it.”

Peter was bright red in seconds. “Oh…”

“Do you love my daughter, Peter?”

The boy’s cheeks somehow managed to go a darker shade of pink.

“I-I uh.. O-of course I do, she’s, uh, she’s my best friend.” Peter stammered out.

Tony narrowed his eyes. “That’s not what I mean, Peter.” The man says, his tone borderline accusatory. “Do you love her, love her?”

Silence. Peter didn’t know what to say, so he opted for nothing at all.

“I already know the answer, Peter, so you might as well just come out and say it.”

Peter pondered his next move. If he played his cards wrong, this conversation could end in him losing his life. Tony Stark was not one to be messed with, especially when it comes to Y/N.

On the other hand, Tony Stark was not one to be lied to, either.

Peter sighed, accepting his fate. “How did you know?”

Much to Peter’s surprise, Tony gave a small smile. “I see the way you look at her, kid. I’ve looked at many girls like that in my day. That enamoured look. You're in love with my daughter, and I have some questions.”

“Questions?”

“Yes, questions, kid. Keep up.”

Peter nodded. “Alright.”

“How long?” Tony asked.

“How long…?” Peter didn’t understand what Tony was aking.

“How long have you been in love with Y/N! How long have you known?”

Peter looked away, breaking eye contact momentarily out of nerves.

When did he begin loving you? Now that he’s truly thinking about it, he can’t really remember.

Maybe it was the first mission that the two of you did together, back when you still known as irongirl. It was a bank robbery, an easy task that Tony had given for your very first mission.

Maybe it was that one time when you dragged him out of bed at 6 AM so that you could show him your favorite coffee shop.

Perhaps it was when you took that faithful mission to Asgard, when you gained your powers accidentally, earning your new title as Nova.

Or, it could be the time that you and him stayed up late binge watching a show he couldn’t remember. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you that night. You looked so beautiful that night, getting excited as something cool happened in the show. Your hair was tied back, wearing an oversized shirt, your face makeup free. He couldn’t help but smile as you laughed, and didn’t think he’d ever heard a more beautiful sound in the world.

Yeah, he thinks it was that night.

“Um… about ten months ago, I think? That’s when I realized, but I think I’ve loved her for longer. I just forced myself not to acknowledge it, I guess.”

Tony nodded in understanding. “I get that. What is it about her?”

Another question the boy had to think about.

“There’s a lot of things, I think. Like how excited she gets when she talks about things she’s passionate about. Oh, and the way she laughs when something’s funny in a movie or a show or something. And the way she sends me memes or videos that she thinks are funny. They’re usually not very funny, but of course I think it’s hilarious just because she sent it to me. And she always listens to me when I talk, even if I’m talking about something stupid and boring like science stuff I think is interesting. She talks back to me like she cares what I’m saying, and I know she probably doesn’t, but she acts like she does, and that’s enough. She always drags me out to go on adventures, or, at least, that’s what she calls them. Usually it’s just going to get coffee or try out some new restaurant she heard about but it’s still fun. She’s just so amazing, and I think she makes me the best version of myself.”

The rant ended, and for a moment, Peter forgot that Tony was even in the room.

“Damn. I wasn’t expecting that. I’m impressed, kid. To be honest, I expected some shallow answer like ‘she looks hot in her suit’ or something like that.”

“No, sir. Of course, she’s beautiful, but Y/N is just so much more than that.”

Tony gave another sweet smile to the boy in front of him.

“She likes you, too, you know.”

Peter’s head snapped toward Tony again.

What the hell did he just say?

“What?”

“Y/N. She likes you.”

“No way. She just sees me as her best friend. I’m probably like a brother to her. She doesn’t like me like that.”

“But she does, kid. I know my daughter better than I know myself. She is head over heels for you, spidey. Which is why you should tell her how you feel.”

“Tell her how I feel? Why would I do that?”

“Because she likes you, too, and then you two will be stupid kids in love.”

“Are you serious?”

“Aren’t I always?”

Peter paused for a moment. “I thought you’d kill me when you found out I liked your daughter, not convince me to go talk to her about it.”

“I’m gonna be honest with you, kid. I brought you in here with the intention of killing you, or just telling you to stay away from my daughter. But after you went on that little rant about why you loved her, I just couldn’t tell you to keep away from her. You really love her, kid, I can tell. So go talk to her.”

“You’re sure you won’t be mad if I ask her out?”

Tony shook his head and smiled.

“Go get her, kid.”

-------

Freshly clean and feeling a significant amount better, you sat on your bed scrolling on your phone. Thoughts of Peter had begun to fade (mainly because you forced them out of your mind) and that helped to keep you from stressing about what’s to come.

You had decided to confess how you feel to Peter.

True, this plan could ruin everything. Today could be the day you lost your best friend, and that thought made you want to cry.

But today could also be the day you finally get to kiss the boy you’ve loved forever, and that thought also made you want to cry.

You didn't have much time to think about it further, however, because Peter was knocking on your bedroom door.

“Y/N? It’s me. Can I come in?”

You paused immediately, your heart rating speeding up.

Oh, shit. This is it. This could be the beginning or the end of you and Peter Parker.

You took a deep breath, steadying yourself. It was now or never.

“Yeah, Petey, come on in.”

The door opened, and the boy you loved so much walked in. His cheeks were pink, you noticed. His cheeks only went pink when he’s nervous. Why was he nervous?

You could tell by his damp hair that he had also showered before coming to your room.

“I need to talk to you about something.” He rushes out.

Oh.

“Same.” is your reply. What else are you meant to say?

“Oh, really? Well, uh, you can go first. I’ll wait.”

You shook your head frantically. “No, you first. You said it first, so it’s only right that you go.”

Peter’s hand went to the back of his neck, rubbing it. Another nervous habit of his.

“Can I sit down?”

You nodded. Why was he even asking? Usually he’d just plop down whenever he pleased, no questions asked. This behavior was very out of character for the boy you knew so well.

The boy sat down on the edge of your bed, and then took a deep breath. “Okay. I don’t know how to tell you this, but I just have to. I don’t want you to hate me, and I really hope this doesn’t affect our friendship, but…”

Peter paused for a moment, and looked into your eyes. They were brimming with concern, and he just couldn’t hold it back anymore. He broke the eye contact you’d been maintaining, mustered up all the courage he could, and then blurted it out.

“I’m in love with you. I have been for I don’t know how long. I wasn’t planning on telling you, because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship, but it was starting to get physically painful and I just- I can’t hide it anymore. I love you and I’m sorry.”

Peter clenched his eyes shut, unable to look at your face. He waited (very anxiously) for a reaction, but it never came. Eventually, he opened his eyes, gaining the burst of bravery it took to look at you.

Your jaw was dropped, the expression on your face unreadable.

Oh, no. No no no no no. He’d fucked up. He fucked everything up and now you were never going to speak to him again. He’d lost you. Damn you, Tony Stark.

“Y/N…” He began his apology solemnly. “I’m-”

But he never got to finish his sentence.

Because you were pouncing on him before he had the chance to.

You were on him within seconds, kissing him with so much intensity that he fell back on the bed. He was taken aback for a moment, but quickly kissed you back.

For a moment, the two of you just lay there, wrapped in one another, kissing like there was no tomorrow.

A kiss that made up for all the ones both of you had longed to have in the months before.

You pulled away gently, looking into Peter’s eyes.

“I have loved you for so fucking long, Peter. I was going to tell you that I loved you today.”

“Are you serious?”

You laughed lightly. “Of course I’m serious, you dumbass.”

“Hey!” Peter feigned offense.

You pecked his lips. “You’re a cute dumbass, though.” And then you were kissing him again, and it’s all you could’ve asked for.

----

After a while, the two of you had finally tired each other out, and now you sat cuddled against each other on your bed. No movie or show was playing; it was just you and Peter, listening to each other’s breathing and the sound of your heartbeats.

You looked up at the beautiful boy you were cuddling with, only to find he was already looking down at you.

“Aren’t you going to ask me out, Parker?”

Peter’s eyes widened, and his cheeks went red (for the millionth time that day.)

“Oh, yeah, I- I just thought- nevermind, uh- Y/N, will-”

“Yes, of course I’ll be your girlfriend, Petey.” You cut him off, saving him a few extra minutes of nervous stammering.

He smiled sheepishly at you, then leaned down to bring you into a kiss.

You cuddled back down into his chest, smiling warmly.

You can confidently say that right now, in this moment, you are the happiest you’ve ever been.

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