#Fake movies

[pardonmybunion]

So this @laurenillustrated artwork and all the vintage-dream-casting at @hotvintagepoll got me thinking: if Scooby Doo were a thing in the 1890s, then a few years later it would be a NATURAL for silent Hollywood. So who do we cast in Hal Roach’s hit 1915-1919 series of Scooby Doo live-action comedy shorts?

Shaggy and Scoob are both easy, because look, here’s Charley Bowers! He always plays chaotic pottering-around-with-machinery types, which is exactly the vibe that 1890s Shaggy gives, and he does so with a surrealist slapstick edge that’s perfect for the material. On top of that, Bowers is a pioneering stop-motion special effects artist—so he can also be our lead animator, and the rapport between live-action Shaggy and his animated Scooby will be delightful.

Like Shaggy, Velma has to have a certain slapstick quality (“Where are my glasses? I can’t see without my glasses”), so it’s lucky we have Alice Howell—nicknamed “the female Charlie Chaplin” by the tiresome people who use that type of comparison. The point is, she can give Velma the bookish self-possession suggested in the 1890s look, AND also run through a gajillion doors in a wacky hallway chase culminating in a spectacular pratfall.

(Mabel Normand is another contender, but her acting style seems a couple notches too naturalistic for Scooby Doo. I definitely see her directing a bunch of the shorts though.)

Fred needs to be both a conventionally hot manly-hero type and a bit of an idiot, so hello Reginald Denny! This British actor emigrated to Hollywood in the early 1910s, became a comedy star, and played himbos so well that he was still playing them into the 1960s. He’s even in the Adam West Batman movie as the naval hero Commodore Schmidlapp, who’s so ditzy he doesn’t realize he’s been kidnapped by the Penguin.

Daphne is a fun one—let’s assume that by this point, Pearl White is tired of all those straight-up action serials like The Perils of Pauline, and wants to do a spoof for a change. With silent comedy shorts there’s always a chance the plot will wander away and leave the individual gags running the store, and White brings enough tension and gravitas to prevent that situation and keep things moving. At the same time, since she favors action roles, she can easily match the dynamism of Bowers, Howell, and Denny.

And that’s to say nothing of all the silent actors who could appear in bit parts on their way to fame. Maybe the gang tears the mask off the ghost, and discovers it’s an early-career Buster Keaton?

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

*Madison Hu plays the young version of Ming-Na Wen’s character

[robsheridan]

VIDEONOMICON (1988), part 2 (see part 1 here). More stills from Maxim Voronin’s cable TV miniseries about a mysterious AV club using Satanic video test patterns to transform unwitting volunteers into demonic flesh vessels.

As the hypnotic powers of the video patterns begin to warp the consciousness of the volunteers, more is revealed about the mysterious cult behind the strange experiments. Unseen by the research volunteers, the “hosts” communicate to them only through various goat heads mounted throughout the facility. Are the human(?) hosts trying to control the evil powers they’re harnessing? Or are they merely pawns in something much more sinister? The answers will only be found by seeing what is beyond; by releasing the prison of the flesh and plunging deeper into the technological hellscape of… The Videonomicon.

To be continued…

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NOTE: This alternate reality horror story is part of my NightmAIres narrative art series (visit that link for a lot more). NightmAIres are windows into other worlds and alternate histories, conceived/written by me and visualized with synthography and Photoshop.

If you enjoy my work, consider supporting me on Patreon for frequent exclusive hi-res wallpaper packs, behind-the-scenes features, downloads, events, contests, and an awesome fan community. Direct fan support is what keeps me going as an independent creator, and it means the world to me.

[theactioneer]

King Lear prop poster from The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)

[rootsinthefuture]

[nevereverywhere]

I designed these fake movie posters for #BeatlesMovies and I quite like how they turned out, so I thought I’d post them on here as well. Maybe this will be my next obsession

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Not sure if anyones explained it yet but if they havent goncharov was a fake horror movie that i think started cause someone took a picture of shoes and then tumblr made lore n stuff

someone... took... a picture of shoes.

I wanna make a fake movie wtf hey guys my lovely maggots gimme a photograph I'll make a fake movie of any genre you please

[last-to-walk]

We saw our first movie! It was called "The Little Aegirmaid"!

In it, a young Aegir woman named Arowana rescued and fell in love with a Sargonian Princess! But her father forbid her from going to the surface! And then she chased a fallen star that traded her three wishes for three things she would no longer need!

The first wish was to find the princess again! This was paid for by losing her sense of touch! Arowana was whisked away in a whirlpool and washed up on the shores of the princess's domain!

The second wish was to be loved in return by the princess, who did not recognize her savior and thought of her only as a lost girl! She was granted a hypnotic voice, in exchange for her sight!

Her voice was too powerful though, and the kingdom came under siege by those who wished to have Arowana for themselves! She made her third wish, to save the kingdom!

The star unfurled and rose the sea around it, revealing its true form as the Leviathan, Ur'shla! She brought tsunamis down upon the invaders, broke the kingdom away from the mainland of Sargon, and washed it out to sea!

Then the time came to pay the price, and Arowana and her kingdom were made to give up their form, becoming Seaborn! And they all lived happily together on their island Kingdom!

[silly-goober-445]

Some art of my original character Xava as a fake movie screenshot. I love drawing this guy, he's like my fantasy world's version of Jesus only he did kill people and definitely did not rise back from the dead. Rip Xava you would've loved owning like ten cats and making tiktoks about them.

[femcelfanboy]

Does anybody remember Mischa (2009)?

The details r a little foggy in my memory but I remember watching this movie as a kid, the memory kinda jumped out while I was watching Hannibal NBC recently.. it was a Hannibal spin off, focusing on Mischa Lecter and Clarice Starling as the main characters. Mischa Lecter was a cannibal & murderer, much like Hannibal is in the franchise.. I remember she was blonde and wore a lot of really formal clothes. Clarice Starling was a criminal profiler, she had an accent and usually dressed casual. Clarice & Mischa had a pretty romantic relationship in the movie, Mischa being in love with Clarice was mentioned a couple times. I don’t remember everything but I remember some other things:

- It was made by some canadian studio, IDK which one but it didn’t have a very high budget lol

- There was talks of a sequel following Mischa & Will Graham, and a TV series following Mischa & Clarice. Both got cancelled

- I remember a scene where Clarice dreamed of marrying Mischa, she woke up screaming. Clarice worked for the FBI still, but her boss was Frederick Chilton instead of Jack Crawford

- At the end of the movie there’s a scene where Mischa gets arrested and a little girl that looks like Clarice watches

- A cover of “The Killing Moon” was on the soundtrack

- Most of the story could be considered like a scrambled up Hannibal story from what I remember.. I don’t remember much lol

- Clarice was trying to catch another killer, I don’t remember them at all but I know she was trying to catch somebody

- Mischa was a psychiatrist for the FBI

- The movie seemed almost like.. an idea board gone wrong?? The movie comes together well but it’s so messy, taking aspects from all the Hannibal movies & books, probably from some other movies too. It felt uncanny, in a way

This movie was a classic when I was a kid, so hopefully I find some other fans on here!! Maybe somebody can jog my memory on other parts of the movie?? Do your thing, Tumblr!

[aisuzana]

[rootbeergoddess]

So we created a fake Martin Scorsese film, what’s next?

A forgotten Hayo Miyazaki film that doesn’t exist? 

A weird, surrealist Disney film was never created?

Or what about the unknown sequel to Nosferatu? The sky is the limit people! 

[robsheridan]

BATTLE SANTAS trading cards were all the rage of Christmas 1988, hyping kids up for a toy line and film franchise that never came to be after Christian protesters halted production.

The cards, produced before the first film was finished, tell the story of a multiverse of cosmic Santas who arrive from across time on an array of Battle Sleighs to help Earth’s Santa save Christmas future from the forces of Hell. On Santa’s lunar battlestation workshop (where he relocated after the North Pole was ravaged in The Santa Wars), his elves built armed vehicles from old toy parts and the re-animated corpses of reindemons, the hellbeasts of the demon army unleashed on Earth after a portal to hell was opened in the North Pole when oil companies drilled near Santa's Earth Workshop (thanks to Reagan’s deregulation of protected lands).

The early release of the trading cards was meant to generate buzz for the film’s funding and toy licensing, but the plan backfired, as the cards revealed a controversial plot point: Mecha-Jesus, the Cybersavior, a towering robotic kaiju Jesus built by the Battle Santas as their last stand against Satan. Mecha-Jesus is piloted by the real Jesus, who the Battle Santas summon back to mortal form. When Christian groups heard about children trading cards that depicted Jesus eviscerating enemies with Nazareth Napalm missiles and shooting Light of the Lord laser beams from his robo-eyes while shouting “The Power of Christ compels you to DIE!” over heavy metal music, a firestorm of protests made the entire BATTLE SANTAS property toxic to investors, leaving the trading cards the only glimpse of a Christmas epic that never came to be.

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NOTE: This alternate reality story is part of my NightmAIres narrative art series (visit that link for a lot more). NightmAIres are windows into other worlds and interconnected alternate histories, conceived/written by me and visualized with synthography and Photoshop.

If you enjoy my work, consider subscribing to my free newsletter to stay up to date on my projects, or supporting me on Patreon for frequent exclusive hi-res wallpaper packs, behind-the-scenes features, downloads, events, contests, and an awesome fan community. Direct fan support is what keeps me going as an independent creator, and it means the world to me.

[thecrowleyeditor]

I'd love to make another fake movie but a tv franchise from a book but i could never

[rootsinthefuture]

In 1976, a science fiction film called "The Call" tells the story of a group of chosen individuals who are called by mysterious aliens who arrive on Earth in their UFOs. The aliens appear to have peaceful intentions, but as the film unfolds, it is revealed that their true intentions are much more complex and disturbing. The chosen ones are taken aboard the alien spaceships and subjected to a series of experiments and tests that test their intelligence, strength and endurance. While some of them quickly adapt to their new circumstances and start collaborating with the aliens, others struggle to maintain their identities and resist the mind control imposed by their captors. As the film progresses, it is revealed that the aliens are trying to create a new hybrid race between humans and extraterrestrials, with the aim of colonizing other planets and ensuring the survival of their species. The calls to the chosen ones are actually an attempt to select the best human specimens to be part of this ambitious project. The hidden message of the film concerns the loss of identity and the importance of maintaining one's humanity in the face of potentially oppressive external forces. A sense of foreboding pervades throughout the film, as viewers wonder what the aliens' true intentions are and whether the chosen ones will be able to resist their control and return to Earth.