#HOWEVER im trying to decide what kind of plants it would have and i initially thought i would use plants that grow on islands in

[petrichor-idyllic]

heyy, hope ur doing well <33

so i have a request for thomas tmr x glader fem!reader, where they both came up together in the box and like the entire time theyre in the glade theyre js inseparable. so when thomas goes into the maze to save minho n alby, reader gets rlly worried and as soon as minho and thomas come back reader feels so relieved and gets emotional and thomas says something like 'dont worry, im never leaving you'. and one of them confesses to the other at the end <333

Oooo finally! I get to write for Tommy boy- that man does not get enough recognition in his own series lmao. He's the main character for a reason.

WAITING GAME

MASTERLIST | THOMAS MASTERLIST

SUMMARY: See above. Movie based fic.

WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, sappy stuff, that's really it.

Thomas was the first person you ever met. Well, the first person you can remember meeting.

In the Box, screeching metal surrounding you with a (admittedly handsome) teenage boy freaking out, trying to wake you up. For some reason, you were a lot calmer than Thomas was. He was bouncing off of the walls and you were just sat on the floor trying to process what was going on.

Then the ceiling opened and Thomas became a human shield.

The Gladers that you would come to know, treated you like an object and a piece of meat, bar a few exceptions. They'd never seen a girl before, but Thomas was there to protect you and make sure they didn't dare lay a hand on you.

Not that it mattered because the second you were both out of the Box, the boy grabbed your wrist and made a sprint for it.

It had somehow silently been decided that you were going to stick with each other. Which included tripping over him when he fumbled over himself and face-planted, as Newt would say.

Though, after the initial shock, you both started to relax more. Joined at the hip, wherever one of you went, the other wouldn't be too far behind.

You learnt about each other at the same rate you learnt about yourselves.

Thomas is reckless- he acts before he thinks and isn't scared of getting in a fight. He also asks a lot of questions and is more than willing to tell everyone his opinion.

You, however, are calmer. You think things through and explore more options. You prefer to let Thomas do the talking and get himself in trouble whilst you're there to try and solve whatever problem he's caused.

And you learnt this is a very small space of time.

Apart from Thomas, you get along with Newt, probably because he is one of the most respectful, and Alby, because he's more than willing to kill anyone that hurts you. Oh, and Chuck- Thomas thinks he's kind of annoying, but you already adore the small boy.

So, when Thomas gets attacked by Ben and Alby and Minho have to go into the Maze after his Banishment, you have a bad feeling about it.

You join Thomas and Newt at the giant Glade Doors, staring down the incredibly long and daunting corridor that almost feels twisting and nauseating. How Minho spends every day out there is beyond you- not that you've ever actually spoken to the guy.

Chuck stands next to you, anxiously looking between Thomas and a very stoic looking Newt. You put your hand on his shoulder.

"They're gonna be fine, Chuck," you smile at him. "Promise."

Glancing at Thomas, you brush your hand against his, making him look at you before he accepts the gesture. Intertwining his fingers with yours, you attempt to playfully nudge him.

Thomas has already become very passionate and caring about everyone here. And with his determination to be a Runner, you can tell he holds Minho very highly despite neither of you having anything to do with him.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" He scoffs, taking a second to let your reassuring presence calm him.

He hesitates. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't developed a crush on you. Well, a lot of people have developed a crush on you because you're the only girl, but you and Thomas have some kind of connection. It's obvious the creators see it too, since you came up with him.

And the feeling is mutual.

"If Minho and Alby don't come back, what are our chances of actually getting out of here?" Thomas says. You understand what he means. Minho knows the Maze better than anyone, and Alby has survived all this time.

"They're gonna make it." Newt repeats himself for what must be the fifth time.

"Newt, they-"

"He's right," you cut Thomas off. "They're gonna make it."

Over time, a crowd begins to form, and Thomas is starting to squeeze your hand a lot harder, shifting on his feet and fiddling with anything he can find. The boy is stressed. At some point, Chuck decided to hold your other hand, so now your holding the hands of two very anxious teenage boys, acting like their mother.

The Doors closing time is drawing dangerous near, and you're starting to get stressed yourself. You stare at the ground, only for your breath to catch in your throat when you look back up.

"There!" You shout, a blur of motion catching your attention as Minho struggles to carry your unconscious leader.

Almost as soon as they emerge, the Doors start to move.

"They're not gonna make it," Newt mumbles. You and Chuck exchange glances, seemingly having the same idea. Letting go of both boys, you cup your hands around your mouth.

"Minho! Come on!" You shout. "You can do it!"

"Come on, Minho!" Chuck joins in, and soon the entire Glade is cheering on the Keeper to return. Some people even telling him to leave Alby, and it doesn't take a genius to tell that Minho isn't going to do that.

"I'm sorry," Thomas grabs your wrist, making you look at him.

"What?"

Without warning, Thomas bolts forward into the Maze. Newt tries to grab him but misses as he squeezes through the Doors, which close with a thud as he just about makes it to the other side.

The crowd stands there in a stunned silence.

You, Newt and Chuck all remain where you stand, almost like if you move, what just happened will become real.

You look at Newt, who stands with his fists balled. Your hand comes to the Doors, your face crunshing as you touch the stone, almost like you're willing it to open.

Newt takes a deep breath. "Everyone bed, now." He commands.

"But, Newt-" Zart starts.

"Now." He sighs. "We can't do anything about this now- and Alby's left me in charge. Bed. Go!"

The crowd disperses, slowly, until it's just you and Chuck left, with Newt standing just behind you.

Your forehead bumps against the stone as a sob shakes your body. The situation has finally set in and you can't stop the tears.

"Hey," Newt puts his hand on your shoulder, "if anyone can survive out there; it's Minho." You raise your head, looking at him and pushing your lips into a thin line. "Get some rest." He gives you a friendly boyish tap and turns to leave.

You look at Chuck, who is sitting on the floor now.

Thomas was the first person you ever met and the only person here you actually trust, so the weird feeling of loneliness and presumptuous guilt hits more than you expected.

You also sit down, taking your place next to Chuck and ignoring Newt's orders.

"They might make it," Chuck says. "Minho knows the Maze more than anyone- if Thomas is with him, he might be okay."

You sit there for what feels like forever, but you have no intention of leaving. Neither does Chuck.

Newt comes over several times in an attempt to get either of you to move, which falls completely flat and he eventually gives up. Though, he does bring you both blankets.

Chuck falls asleep after a while, and you let him use your leg as a pillow. But you stay awake.

You've known Thomas for only a few days but it feels like your whole entire life. You, for some reason, even liked Thomas when he was just a random boy you were trapped in a box with that didn't even know his name.

And now he was gone.

You were drifting in and out of consciousness when Chuck jumps up. That and the loud sounds of the Doors opening startles you back to reality. Sitting in the same position all night definitely wasn't good for your back but you have different priorities.

Scrambling to your feet, Chuck gets the other Gladers' attention and a small crowd forms, Newt leading the group.

It's like your surroundings become static and nothing feels real as the corridor remains empty.

People start to move away, with Newt putting his hand on the small of your back in an attempt to comfort you, making you look at him.

"No way," Zart mumbles, making your attention snap back to the Maze. Rounding the corner is Thomas and Minho, both exhausted and struggling to drag Alby back to the Maze.

You freeze, relief and shock overwhelming you as you stare at them. Cheers break out as they reach the Glade, dropping to their knees and panting.

"Did you see a Griever?" Chuck asks- because of course he does.

"Yeah," Thomas pants, "I saw one."

"He didn't just see it; he killed it." Minho adds, causing a new air of unease to spread across the crowd.

"Alright," Newt clears his throat, "get to the Med hut- all of you. We gotta make sure you're not shuckin' dyin' or some klunk."

Clint and Jeff help grab Alby. Minho and Thomas pick themselves up.

Thomas pauses, looking at you.

"You're a fucking idiot," you say, watching as Thomas nervously swallows, opening his mouth but he doesn't get chance to speak.

"Oi, Greenie," Minho calls after him, "let's go!"

You jolt your head in the direction of the Keeper, silently telling Thomas to go.

"Are you happy to see him or do you wanna se him?" Chuck asks, clearly more chipper than you.

"Both?"

He laughs.

You leave them to it as Thomas and Minho get patched up. But it's a weird feeling. You replayed it in your head- you expected to dive into his arms, confess your feelings or some shit.

But you just stood there.

Unmoving. And unsure what to do.

You watch Thomas leave the hut, talking briefly to Newt before making a beline for you as you sit at the edge of the Deadheads.

You look up at him from your seat in front of an old tree, pushing your lips into a thin line.

"Hi." He says.

"Hey." You respond.

"Newt wants us to have some Gathering in Council Hall." He awkwardly rocks on his heels. "He wants us all there. The Glade' goin' crazy."

"Why would you do that?"

"What?"

"Run into the Maze?"

"I had to help," he sighs, "I couldn't just leave them-"

"You could've died!" You snap, making Thomas jump. Your voice breaks slightly, the emotions of last night coming back up. "I would've lost you." The last part comes out as more of a whisper.

Thomas sighs, moving and crouching so he can sit next to you.

"Don't worry," he looks at you, slipping his fingers into yours as your arms fall falt at your sides. "I'm never leaving you."

You look at him out of the corner of your eye. Overwhelmed by feelings and unsure what else to do, you lean in.

Kissing him in the cheek, Thomas' body immediately tenses and his skin quickly becomes warm and red. You pull back, struggling to repress the smirk of your flustered friend.

"You know," he mumbles, facing you properly, "Minho ran off and left me, and all I could do was think about getting back to you. I was going to get back to you- whatever it took."

Your heart beat picks up as he glances at your lips for a second. "I like you, (Y/N). I feel... connected to you. I don't get it and I don't remember why, but you're all I think about even though I spend all my time with you. And I guess nearly dying has made me say it."

You smiles, and the images somehow makes him more flustered. "I- uh, I want- I mean-"

"Shut up, Thomas," you lean in, brushing you nose against his and giving him a hint, which he takes.

Your body feels on fire when he kisses you, and the relief that he's still here hits you all over again. He's safe here, and he's not going anywhere.

"Oi!" Newt's voice scares the shit out of you both. "I told you shanks we have a Gathering! Quit makin' out and get your sorry butts to Council Hall!"

You sit there, both of you blinking at Newt, who clearly isn't properly equipped to deal with this because he leaves pretty quick.

Thomas chuckles, standing up and offering you a hand. You smile, taking it and allowing him to help you up.

He isn't going anywhere, and he's yours.

Woooooo Thomas request- Done! I absolutely adore Minho, but it is nice to write for other characters sometimes.

I hope you enjoyed :))

[weenwrites]

yay for attempting this crossover!! im really glad you're giving this a try, tho if you end up not liking it i understand, im just happy you're hearing me out!!!

this character is from my current favorite game: guild wars 2. he's called Trahearne, and he's a sylvari, aka sentient plant-like people! he's also a necromancer, which i think would be startling to Cybertronians when they hear he studies magic that raises the dead into his personal minions. Trahearne is a good guy tho, not evil, and he has a hard and troubling destiny ahead of him, a fate given to him since he awoke in his world.

if he were in the tfp world, trying to get back w the help of team prime, what do you suppose their opinions of him would be???

no pressure if you're not into this, but if you are, have fun!! don't worry about not knowing this fandom or game, thank youuuu

✎ A/N: Just to clarify to people OTHER than the requester, I still don't do crossovers and I don't think I ever will after this one because it was difficult for me to write. The only reason I'm making an exception for this crossover is because I decided to say "yes" to it because I wanted to give it a shot. Also anon I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond, but I tried my best with what you gave me to work with, and I hope you see it and enjoy it.

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

Optimus

Despite Trahearne's disposition, Optimus wouldn't be the type of person to judge him because of it. So long as Trahearne is someone who wishes to do good, then he's willing to extend his hand to help him however he can.

He can somewhat relate with having a troubling destiny, as he is the bearer of the matrix and the leader of the autobots. The fate of two worlds are balanced upon his shoulders, and his every move may risk toppling them both. He tries to offer what bits of wisdom and knowledge he can in hopes that it will one day be of use to him.

Ratchet

He believes that the team already has enough to worry about with humans to protect and the decepticons scouring the earth, they needn't anything more to take care of on their plate. Unless Trahearne's willing to extend a hand to help Ratchet with his duties, then it's most likely that the two will have little room to interact.

But speaking of magic, Ratchet initially thinks that it's ridiculous. Magic doesn't exist, and he doesn't believe that studying it is even possible. If Trahearne's the kind of person to prove Ratchet wrong and show off his skills, then the look on Ratchet's face is something that no one will be forgetting any time soon.

Ultra Magnus

Like Ratchet, Ultra Magnus believes that effort and resources should be poured into the war effort as opposed to aiding a stranger, or at the very least form a partnership so that both sides get something out of it. Yet if he is ordered to help return Trahearne back to his world, then he'll comply without another complaint.

Smokescreen

He initially thinks that it's super cool that he has some predetermined destiny waiting for him—so long as that destiny is to do good in the world. He may come off as a little insensitive at first (especially if Trahearne's destiny is something he has complicated feelings about) but he's quick to realize any mistakes and apologize if he said something he shouldn't have.

He'd think the whole "doing magic" thing is real cool, and he'd ask all sorts of questions about it, like what can he do with magic? How does he do it? Smokescreen would even want to try learning, and if he was given the opportunity he would legitimately pour in the time and effort to do magic.

Bulkhead

Wait so if he raises the dead to do his bidding, were these undead servants people he killed or people that were already dead? And would it work on cybertronians? To Bulkhead, if he thinks long enough about zombies brought from the dead to do someone's bidding, it grows more and more disturbing. But zombies aside, if Trahearne's a good guy, then there's a chance the two of them could get along just fine.

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

There is a very tall plant with yellow flowers growing out of the middle of the bush honeysuckle

Its gotta be at least 7 feet tall

If its a native plant I am impressed. That honeysuckle was slowly killing 3 trees

I gotta get out there later to try and identify it. The flowers are facing away from the house so I can't see the front so looking at pictures of flowers isn't helping much. And I need a better look at the leaves. I think it may be a type of sunflower?

Idk how I havent noticed it before

Look at it go

[k1ngdom-of-thieves]

Could I request an imagine with Thoma, Venti and Childe? Who has a crush on the reader. (And maybe +a Platonic Ganyu?)

Basically They haven’t seen Reader in a few days and they suddenly hear REALLY horrible sobbing turns out reader just tends to cry a lot and they didn’t wanna burden anybody or seem really weak hearted in front of them

Coming right up! I hope everything is alright anon :)

Thoma, Venti, Childe, and Platonic! Ganyu + Crying Reader

Thoma

Thoma was walking over to your home because he hasn't seen you in a while and he was really starting to miss your company. He even brought little snacks and everything! such a good guy

As he was going to your place, he heard loud sobbing from behind a tree. Pushing his initial confusion beside, he walked towards the crying tree.

"Um, hello? Is everything alright?"

He was surprised to find that it was you who was sniffling behind the large plant. im trying to not repeat the same thing shush. He slowly sits down and offers you a snack.

"There you are. You don't have to tell me everything but please, just sit with me for a minute."

You told him how you didn't want him to see you as weak or childish just for crying a lot. He put his plate of tiny treats down next to him to pull you into a hug.

"That changes nothing about how I feel for you. I love you because you are so kind, sweet and charming. A couple tears aren't going to ruin that."

Venti

Venti noticed that you hadn’t come to Angel’s Share in a while and he was really starting to miss his drinking buddy. even though it was mostly him drinking and you pulling him away from them

After asking around the bar and getting kicked out by Diluc he decided to look around for you himself. The first place he checked was the large tree at Windrise, since that’s where he would go if he didn’t want to be found.

As he was walking towards the grand oak he heard an unmistakable sound. The sound of crying. And it sounded like someone was crying on the other side of the great tree. 

Turns out he was right on the money. Venti saw you on the ground while sobbing your soul out. You didn’t notice the bard until he was litterlay inches away from you.  

“I finally found you! Why haven’t you been around lately? Did I do something to upset you?”

After you got over the jumpscare, you told him why you hadn’t appeared in the bar as of late and that it wasn’t his fault. You just happened to not want to bother him with your crying.

“That’s such a silly thing to worry about! I’d never this less of you just because you were feeling down. It happens to the best of us! Now, let me tell you a funny little story to make you feel better!”

Childe

Props to you for being able to avoid this guy, he’s just everywhere. 

Childe was walking down the streets of Liyue Harbor to look for a gift to get you. He was getting worried about not seeing you in a few days and hoped that getting you a little trinket would at least get you to see him again. The gingerbread man was really starting to miss his partner in not actual crime.

He had just picked up a brooch that he thought you’d like when he heard very loud sobs coming from a table at the next door restaurant. At first, he didn’t want to get involved but then he realized the sobs sounded like his lover. 

He walked up to the table and indeed saw his partner sobbing like their life depended on it. Placing his gift down on the table, he started to rub your shoulders as a means to calm you down. You jump out of your skin before recognizing your boyfriend in front of you. 

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s me, what’s wrong?”

You told them that it wasn’t anything extreme, you just didn’t want to let him see you as vulnerable. 

“You are one of the strongest people I know, your heart and bravery is what made me fall for you in the first place. While we’re here, I have a surprise for you. Close your eyes just for one second.”

Ganyu

Ganyu had heard of you disappearing from crowds through mutual friends and decided to take the day off to go check up on you. 

However, she didn’t really know where to look after knocking on your front door and decided to rest at a local store that wasn’t having many customers.

Of course being Ganyu, she ended up dosing off after a certain amount of time. She only awoke when she heard the sound of very loud sobbing in the distance. Getting up, she walked over to the sound only to be met with her dear friend wailing like they just lost the lotto. 

She slowly sat down next to you and started talking to you with a softness like silk. 

“I was just looking for you, do you mind telling me what’s wrong? You don’t have to of course, I don’t want to overstep any boundaries.” 

You tell her that it’s just because you don’ want people to think lesser of you because of how often you cry.

“Oh, I see. Well, if you want to do something to take your mind off of things, how about I show you some of my favorite dogs in the harbor?”

[yeoreos]

avid || jjk (m)

pairing: demon!jungkook x human!reader

genre: 18+, smut

summary: jungkook finds you at a bar and sets you as his night's target

warnings: oh lord smut. lots and lots of smut.

wc: 4k

note: i was kind of lazy to finish it, but hey, its 4k of foreplay; nothing beats that! (also sorry for not posting in a while i was busy with beginning of year exams *cries*)

jungkook first noticed you in a bar. on weekends, it was transformed into a seedy nightclub. he liked to go there while he was looking for something to eat; something to conquer for the night. he discovered a plethora of attractive females and, each with broken hearts and hungry gazes - all yearning for a nighttime lover.

he never believed his eyes when they landed on you. the state you were in was pitiful. he guessed that you had just broken up with this boyfriend of yours, hence the mascara and ruined makeup on your face. or perhaps it was a platonic breakup. despite your state, his mahogany orbs never left your figure. what a cute thing you were.

a pretty face that was exactly his type, the perfect curves of your tits, hips, and ass has his knees weak. if you were to ask, he would give.

of course, his initial plan had been thrown out the window the instant he saw you. you leaned against the bar, accepting an order, with a grin on your lips. It sparked something in him, all the confidence (whether it be from the alcohol in your veins or not, it didn't matter to him) and allure.

he knew your name. how could he miss the way your own name rolled off of your tongue so easily? how could he miss the way your lips formed a smirk after seeing jungkook? how could he miss your scent when you pulled him in to kiss you?

this was jungkook's specialty, depravity. wherever he went, he brought a tale of wickedness and depravity with him, the quality hooking onto him like a magnet.

he was a fallen angel, to be sure. a demon, a fallen angel. to be more specific, an incubus. he fed off of sex and vice, appetites and irrational cravings. he drank often in front of ladies like you, at bars or in beds, whose gazes wracked over him, and he fed off of human energy.

over time, after a handful of centuries, he had gotten bored of playing the same old games in bed. jungkook knew what he wanted, however, he was never able to satisfy that itch in the back of his throat, yearning for something to quench his sinful thirst.

he was tired, watching from atop the hill nearby, where he watched the sun rest for the night. just like you had. the darkness of the night overtook the city of seoul and jungkook knew it was his hour to strike; to feed his thirst.

so, the demon went after you, hovering over your small figure over the pathetic excuse of a bed. the soft rising and falling of your chest and the soft snores that escaped from your mouth once in a while, was all the proof jungkook needed that you were fast asleep.

jungkook extended his hand towards you, brushing his knuckles on your cheek, a tremor coursing through his body as a result of the contact. the energy you were emitting caused every molecule in his body to twitch in response. captivating.

oh how badly he wanted a taste.

when you stirred a little, a small groan leaving your lips, jungkook stilled. had you woken up? however, it was just a small movement you were causing in your sleep which allowed you to further curl up against the pillow.

he grinned.

it was time.

"let's go in that dream of yours, shall we?"

-

when he opened his eyes again, jungkook didn't expect himself to be in the same bar, be in the same exact position as before. however, this time, you were looking directly at him with your hungry eyes, mimicking his.

ever since heaven had decided to clip his wings, jungkook gave up on the little purity he had left, letting himself follow his heart.

so that's why he felt no shame in eyeing your figure up and down multiple times.

it wasn't necessarily anything that stood out about you, but it was just the aura you were giving off, that sweet feminine scent that lingered near the air around you, that small curve of your lips. but it might have mostly been the way you called for him, despite not knowing his name.

"hello, handsome."

jungkook didn't really have a preference when coming to his targets. he didn't prefer virgins; he always thought that they were inexperienced and didn't know how to give a good head. he didn't prefer the experienced either; he always thought that they knew too much and made the sex too sloppy. it was somewhere in between. and by the looks of it, you seemed like the perfect target. it had his insides churning, a long yearning for a good fuck. he thought he was going crazy.

throughout his centuries of living, he saw empires and clans of royalty fall and rebuild itself, being reborn. he didn't go out of his way to feel good, but he took whatever the universe offered to him. in this case, it was you.

when the surroundings suddenly changed to a much quieter one, where no one was bumping into each other, jungkook furrowed his eyebrows. it did not, however, take him long to notice that you were in the premises of your bedroom, the small plants on your windowsill being a huge clue.

“who are you?” you inquired, your voice scarcely audible. smirking, the man took a step forward. in contrast to his sparkling eyes, the moonlight from the window follows his body flawlessly, giving him a blue tone on his skin. you became aware of his exposed skin due to his lack of clothing. as you took in his powerful body, a flicker of longing tingled between your legs.

the man stayed deafeningly silent. instead, the man crept onto the bed, trailed by what appeared to be a shadow. you kept a tight eye on his every move because you couldn't move. you felt yourself spreading your legs wide as he crept over top of you. you had a tremendous want to feel him and be completely consumed by him.

despite being a demon, a sex demon (literally), jungkook still understood the morals of consent, making sure it was his top priority. after all, he wouldn't want it if he was in your position.

"are you okay with what's going to happen?" his words were like a captivating chime in your ears, quickly relaxing you and making you desire more. you found yourself placing our hands on his shoulders in order to feel his silky skin. how was it possible for a man to be both burning hot and icy cold at the same time? the dampness between your legs was unbearable, and you were drawn to him with all your might. your nipples perked beneath your shirt as you didn’t wear a bra to bed, you remembered. this made sense. something you remembered vividly. just a shirt and panties was all you wore to bed. clearly you must be dreaming, so you may as well indulge without regret.

"y-yes." you dropped your hands to grasp your shirt and pull it over your head to display your nakedness while looking into the man's eyes. with a hunger for your every move, he kept an eye on you. as he glanced over you, his throat vibrated with a palpable growl. you noticed he was completely hard as your gaze slid down your body with his. in a humble tone, you inquire, "is this real? this isn't a dream, is it?"

the man's grin makes your entire body twitch. you feel him quickly remove your underpants and fling it somewhere off the bed. you become acutely aware of the excitement between your legs as well as the heat emanating from his body. he lowers himself still more until he's right up against your door.

“would you prefer to be dreaming... or would you prefer to be here with me?” the man inquires, his tone innocent but with a sinister undertone.

when you reached for your thighs to give yourself some relief, there was nothing there. as your eyes scanned your surroundings, all you could feel was the chill of your own flesh. red. your vision was completely red. it was almost as if someone had brought in a red mood lamp and shone it throughout the room. it was entirely painted in a bright crimson color. your epidermis. the walls on all four directions. it was all red.

everything seemed hazy and perplexing, and you wondered where you were. you were in a new environment. some may even argue it was a living hell.

you sat up and wrapped yourself in the nearest blanket you could locate before standing up. warm wooden floorboards greeted your bare feet. “what?” kneeling down, you firmly pressed your hand on the wood once again to be sure you weren't hallucinating, but then again, what's to say you weren't hallucinating the whole thing?

'im not a lunatic... you thought to yourself as the warm sensation of the wood stretched across your palm. you straightened up and looked about your flat, trying to figure out what you could do about the red. you stood up straight and began to look around your apartment to see if there was anything you could do about the red. nibbling on your lower lip gently, you stood up straight and began to look around your apartment to see if there was anything you could do about the red.

the door to your bedroom squeaks open just as you were ready to turn on the light switch. the sound reverberated throughout the room with such eerie intensity that you were nearly persuaded your tv had turned back on and was showing yet another horror movie. then something happened. from your room, a man who could only be described as the devil strolled in as if he owned the place. you would be fascinated by this man's beauty if he hadn't just walked in like that. a scar runs from the left side of his jaw all the way down to his neck, giving him a strong jawline. his delicate yet sharp-looking features are caressed by soft wild hair, and his adorable small head is adorned with two pointy horns. it was the eyes, though, that drew your attention.

not the fact that he emerged from your room shirtless. nor the fact that he had claws and a commanding tail swishing back and forth. no, it was those soulless black eyes that were piercing right through you. your very being. you were in some type of trans as the mystery man - no, not man - thanks to those black coals. devil. That sounded more like it.

you couldn't take your gaze away, but as your feet shuffled you further away from this entity, they did all the thinking for you. it only appeared to encourage the beast to keep going before you pressed up against him and the wall. as you summoned the strength to speak up, your grip on the blanket trembled a little. “wh-what are you looking for?” your voice faded away quietly.

the devil had smirked at your frailty and little dread before running a clawed hand through your unkempt hair “i'm starving, my love.” before leaning in and drinking in your aroma, it spoke in the lowest, almost infantile voice. “won't you feed me nice and well, love? after all, you did want this to be real, right?” you weren't sure if it was the tone of his voice or the proximity, but you nodded in accord.

he grabbed your neck and ran his tongue across his lips before taking you into a harsh but passionate kiss. soft cherry red lips ravished your lips in a ravenous embrace while his hands roamed across your body, grasping and groping everything it could find.

a deep moan emerged from both of you as you felt the tightness of his jeans against your leg, causing a burning feeling. the burning of want burned through your skin everywhere he touched, everywhere he invaded with his mouth, hands, and body. it was almost a nasty, twisted euphoria that made your cunt clench around nothing in eagerness.

as the unnamed monster looked you up and down, an almost animalistic growl exited his throat as he took a deep inhale, you gasped for air. “love, you smell so fucking amazing for me.” he spoke in hushed tones through little pockets of air. “you're so delicious that i could devour you whole.”

the very thought of doing so appeared to amuse him, as he let out a brief but malicious laugh before narrowing his focus to the blanket still clinging to you.

with a scowl on his face, he clasped his larger hand around the one holding the blanket in place before yanking at it, only to have you keep it in place. the devil, with his head cocked to the side, gazed at you, perplexed, as if he didn't understand what you were doing.

“it's just that,” you murmured, tightening your jaw at the gaze those empty eyes gave you like a chill up your spine, "i feel comfortable like this...” you muttered the last bit, swallowing any spit you had.

but there was no justification or apology for him, so he raised his claw into the air and cut the blanket, ripping it open wide.

fear, as well as the lust racing through your veins, were clouding your judgment once more. the notion that his claws were so near to slicing you terrified you and turned you on like nothing you'd ever experienced. it gave a sense of how perilous it was to be so near to this creature, which was part of what made it so thrilling.

"baby, nothing is safe when i'm around."

those words, on the other hand, did it for you. you reached out to him as soon as you dropped the tattered blanket on the floor, exposing yourself to him. you drew him back into another intense kiss by wrapping your arms around him and springing up to wrap your legs around his waist. as he grasped your thighs to keep you in place, he was caught completely off guard by your sudden bravery.

each passing breath spent on one another battling for control, hips sliding up against each other as your damp panties rubbed up against his encaged dick, which was most definitely pressing painfully against the denim trousers he was wearing, made the kiss more hungry and animal-like. the cool contact of skin moving up against your back and down your underwear made you whimper.

despite his animalistic state, you always thought he was beautiful, a rare creature. "you're beautiful," you murmured, oblivious to the fact that you were saying it aloud. he laughed with his head tilted back. his neck was big and thick, but it was the raised markings that went all the way around it that caught your eye; they were woven together like chains, as if he had been choked with scorching metal.

the demon kissed you long and hard, barely pausing to breathe. His tongue was lengthy and had a split down the center. it was a novel experience that was strangely addictive. you became engrossed in the way it encircled your own. with his fangs, the monster simply paused to tug on your lower lip. as his hand moved down to your thigh, you let out a faint little groan.

he sang, “such a good girl,” as he drew you up into his arms. Jungkook snatched you up like feather. as you placed your legs around his tiny waist, his arms bulged. before he entered your room, he gave you a lengthy, scorching kiss. you had your arms around his neck, sliding your fingers through his hair and scraping against the base of one of his horns as an experiment.

the devil looked down at you as you lay on your bed, his crimson eyes flashing in the dim light. only those eyes and the white-tipped base of his horns could be seen with the moon blearily seeping through your blinds. it felt as though the monster beneath your bed had arrived to devour you. slowly, he moved his hand up the wall, flicking on the light and bathing you both in a golden glow.

you eventually let your gaze drift away from his, focusing on his toned chest, tight waist, and muscular thighs. when you noticed the bulge yearning to be freed from his pants, you licked your lips. he finally went closer, his lips brushing against yours as he crept between your legs. his hands crept up to the band of your shorts, the heat of his palm scorching and heavy on your bare thighs.

he yanked your shorts down your hips and flung them behind him as he kissed you. he tore through your shirt even quicker, softly cursing as he saw your naked breasts. you yanked on his shirt, trying to get a better look at him and to touch every scrap of exposed flesh you could discover. he sat back and yanked his shirt off, displaying golden skin stained with crimson ink and muscular abs that rippled with each breath. you were so focused on his appearance that you almost missed the expression in his eye as he glanced down at you.

“fuck, you look like an angel,” he said, reaching down to rip your panties apart, only to shred them. your moist lips were exposed by the chilly air as you gasped. at the sight, he bit his lower lip and groaned. “very gentle and plaint." slowly, he ran his hands down your body, starting at the rib cage and working their way down to your thighs.

his fingers became hotter and hotter along the way, till they were on the verge of burning. until he came to your knees and quickly shoved your legs apart and up, crimson streaks remained on your skin. smirking at your hiss of pain, his palms pushed your thigh back till they touched your chest. “so ready to be used,” he states.

"please do."

“well, angel, since you asked so nicely,” he leaned very close to your cunt and licked a lengthy strip. his forked tongue slithered inside your slit, relishing in the lengthy groan that came out of your mouth. he swirled above the opening for a minute, then slipped just the tip of it inside when you finally relaxed against him.

jungkook gradually started penetrating your pussy with his tongue. the warm, slithery appendage that slithers in and out of you with increasing ease, flicking at your g-spot and making you whine in delight. you exhaled with relief when he licked up to your clit, only to scream when he clamped his mouth over the delicate nub and sucked hard enough for you to see stars.

moans and groans emitted from your lips and the demon could have sworn he had never heard anything prettier. his mouth salivates against your lips, only causing him to dip down near your entrance and trail his tongue back to your little nub. oh how sweet you were.

"my angel's already close to cumming?" there was no denying that. he had already noticed you were quickly approaching your high by the way you tugged on his locks and the way your moans became higher in pitch.

the demon took two of his long fingers and slipped them into your pussy, a squelching noise emitting from the action. you tugged so hard on your lips that it was plump and swollen, the irony blood almost spilling from them. he quickly started pumping his fingers and curling it, sending you seeing stars. he wanted you to get ready for the real deal (aka his cock).

"god, please fuck me, please please i'm so close to cumming but i wanna cum on your cock, please," if it weren't for you sounding so pretty and desperate for him, the demon would have prolonged the foreplay.

“there is no ‘god' here,” he hissed, sliding two fingers inside your pussy and sucking hard on your clit as you almost shouted in delight. his fingers curled within you quickly, drawing you closer to the brink. your fingers ran aimlessly through his hair, yanking it back to keep him near. you scratched on one of his horns with your nails.

it wasn't until another orgasm crashed upon you that the demon stopped.

you were spent; messy hair, hazy eyes, drool dripping down your chin and onto your neck and some parts of your chest.

as sly as a fox, you felt jungkook pressing his heavy length on your clit, the warmth and hardness of it evident in the way it pressed up against the little nub. jungkook evilly rutted against the bundle, sending sharp pleasures erupting from the mere action.

you thought he would stop at a few thrusts, however, jungkook had other plans in mind. those being seeing you completely helpless underneath him (not like you weren't before).

with one more came a push, your insides clenching and squeezing the head of his cock like a vice. jungkook stills above you; only the tip in and you're already this tight? he allows a shaky breath to reveal itself from his throat, the sound coming out a little more strangled and choked that he intended it to be.

you took him inch by glorious inch. the two of you reveled in the pleasure, drinking off of each other's moans and heat.

the rest of the night was spent in each other's arms. it wasn't romantic, but it sure as hell was full of pleasure.

[random-yandere-fandom]

How about yandere TC meliodas but a soulmate au where him and the s/o( Fairy and goddess hybrid who fights for stigma) both share a connection to each other, from sharing emotion, to having vision of where they may meet for the first time. This seem like a nice concept, I imagine meliodas is use to constantly feeling pain from training all the way to fighting the war only to have a s/o who is yet to meet him but is willing to send over positive emotion and feeling to make him feel better. Im sucker for this kinds of things.

Oh hell yes, I love soulmate aus! Which is why it got a bit longer than what I normally write (and took so long lol)

Yandere TC Meliodas with soulmate darling

For as long as you can remember there had been a second layer to your emotions that you couldn`t quite grasp, let alone influence. It was just barely there, almost unnoticeable.  Annoyance, nonchalance and a deep-rooted but hidden pain. After learning that those belonged to your soulmate, to the being your were destined to meet and love, you were baffled. Three emotions. A few feelings. Was that all they were capable of, or was that all they could allow themselves to? You mused that they felt your surprise and pity and hoped they wouldn`t connect the dots, they didn`t seem like the kind of person to appreciate such sentiments. Nonetheless you wanted to help. If they weren`t able to and didn`t have the opportunity to experience joy, wonder, excitement and a healthy amount of sadness and grief that one felt at ending a wonderful book with no continuation than you would have to do it for them. If they were hurt you could send them comfort and if they were bored you`d jump down a cliff if you must only to open your wings at the last second to send them a dose of mixed excitement and fear and laughter.

Meliodas had known of the concept of soulmates for as long as he could remember. Since then he had always been told that he wouldn`t need them, that demons barely needed their destined partner and only to allow any connection beyond the unavoidable should they be of the same race. He knew that something was wrong with that but in the end he didn`t care enough to do anything about that. So they felt what he did and at some point he`d know where you two would meet. Great. As long as they don`t get in his way and he can do what he must it`d be fine. 

He always knew that his range of sentiments were by far not the widest or the happiest but he would do. Meliodas had to. He had to be strong and cold and unfeeling. That did not seem to be the case for his soulmate, however. There were a mix of emotions constantly changing, most of them he hadn`t even experienced himself. They are a bother, he told himself and ignored it. He also ignored the twinge in his chest whenever they felt sad, ashamed or dispirited. Told himself that he was lucky that they weren`t sending feelings consciously, especially when he had to concentrate.

That changed. There was no warning, no prompting, nothing. Meliodas was about to go to sleep when they did it for the first time. They must have felt his exhaustion and either they thought he didn`t deserve to rest or wanted to spite him because the next thing he knew he felt adrenaline coursing through his veins and excitement erupting. Cursing he sat up, trying to calm his racing hearts and suppress that stuff. The emotions promptly calmed down and went into their normal, ignorable state though he could make out some guilt. For good measure he made his annoyance clear before flopping back down and closing his eyes. That didn`t stop a small and rather short lived smile from surfacing.

Was it your best idea? No. Did you think about what you were doing? No. You had felt your soulmate`s fatigue and seeing as it was the afternoon and they didn`t normally feel like that at this certain time you had assumed that they needed a bit of energy. Luckily, you had been sitting on a rather high branch and before you could think it through you had thrown yourself of from it. Upon their rejection though you had quickly stopped your little stunt and the idea that they had wanted to sleep crossed your mind. Ups. This had been the first time you had enforced an emotion and it had gone wrong. Hoping that their first impression of you could still be fixed you laid low for a bit. 

The next opportunity presented itself when you had discovered a beautiful small pond in the forest. It was surrounded by rich plant live and some ducks were swimming on it, the sunshine reflected and sparkled on the water’s surface. Deciding that now would be a good opportunity you checked on their emotions. There was no apparent change from normal so it should be fine. Carefully and a lot slower this time you let your admiration seep through to them and being encouraged by the response, which was nothing, you strengthened it, letting yourself enjoy the coolness of the water as you dipped your feet in. Sitting there you shared this feeling, the contrast of the warm light and the refreshing cold, the calmness of the forest, far away from the others and the silence only being broke by the wind and birds in the sky. With all the work you had been doing and the tense atmosphere of your partner the relaxation was welcomed with open arms. 

After this first successful interaction you continued, first about once a week and then once a day and soon simply whenever you felt like it. You were a bit disappointed that your soulmate never openly reacted but you had noticed that their feelings had calmed down and that was enough to keep you going. Having long ago realised that they were fighting in the same war, the suspicion and caution mixed with the occasional numbness, you assumed that they numbed their feelings in hopes of suppressing regret, you sent as much comfort as you could. It was gut wrenching whenever you noticed the impassivity but you did your best to help.

Meliodas grew used to it, over time. He even grew to like it, not that he`d ever admit it. Sensing your enforced emotions brought him joy and comfort, knowing that there was someone out there who cared. He sometimes felt guilty about not replying but what did he have to share? So he let the one sided communication continue. 

You always made sure to only strengthen positive emotions or small harmless sadness, just to let them know what you were feeling. This time however you feared that you had made a mistake. You were patrolling and you were careless. It was close to enemy territory but there hadn`t been an incident here and there was this beautiful flower in full bloom and you simply had to send your amazement. Doing just that you hovered over the flower, it`s sweet smell calming your mind. The next thing you knew was a sharp pain in your side as you moved away, away from whatever had slashed you. 

It was a small demon and you were quickly able to take care of it before healing your wound. Before you could investigate if there were any others you felt their worry. It was overwhelming. For the first time they openly enforced their feelings and it was intense enough that you couldn`t breathe for a moment. You noticed some anger interlaced, too, directed at what had harmed you, you noted. Quickly sending them your calmed frame of mind you searched for any other attackers and upon finding none you returned to report to one of the other goddesses.

Meliodas had been walking down a lonely hallway when you noticed the flower. Humming in acknowledgement he opened the door to his room and froze. Instead of admiration you seemed to be in pain. What had happened? Were you okay? His mind raced as he allowed himself to worry and let that worry reach you. The seconds were he felt your pain, surprise, resignation and caution were agony. After he was assured you were fine he sighed in relief. 

After the second time the demon decided that he should contact you more. After his initial worry had subsided he had become anxious. Not only could you be harmed at any time, he had no way of helping you, not without knowing who or where you were. He realised he didn`t know much of you. Was there someone who liked you beside him, someone you liked? He hoped not. You were his. You two were fated to be, no matter how stupid that sounded. However he had no real way of checking, so interacting with you like this had to be enough for now. He also grew more attentive of your passive emotions, not letting a single feeling pass his attention.

It is a well known fact that before you meet your destined other, you envision the place you will first meet. You had been waiting for that day for ages, knowing that soon after you`d finally meet them, your soulmate. They had been so much more communicative and their joy caused by interactions grew day by day. So when you opened your eyes in a supposedly dream and felt closer to them than ever before you knew that your encounter was drawing near.

The first thing you noticed were your surroundings which resembled a patch of woods just on the border to demon territory. It was cold and clouds hung deep over the sky, it was eerily silent. Not the most romantic, you decided, but whatever. Taking a closer look you noticed a figure approaching from the woods, across from you and the border. It was more of a shadow than anything, you could make out the rather small height but any other details didn`t quite seem to be comprehensive or noticeable. So this was them. You smiled, though you could guess that they wouldn`t see that with how they most likely perceived you in a similar way that you could view them. No words were spoken as you stood only meters apart, time seemingly frozen as all you could do was hope that you could stay like this for longer. Neither they nor you moved, fearing that otherwise the bubble would burst and the glass would shatter and you would wake up, more lonely than ever now that you were apart again. You couldn`t speak, somehow knowing that sounds would not travel far here, but you didn`t need to do that, as all you needed was your connection and bond as soulmates. Warmth, affection and joy swirled between you both and almost felt tangible, as if all you needed to do was reach out to drown in these emotions. 

When Meliodas found himself in a dream more realistic than any other he wondered what had happened. He wandered a bit before recognising the forest to be the one crossing the border that Stigma established and vehemently defended. Feeling a presence he followed the strange pull, coming across the figure hidden in shadows with wings that couldn`t have been a fairy`s or a goddess`s. Something else or something in between? He didn`t care. All that mattered was the sense of recognition. It was you. His partner. His destined other. His soulmate. His.

Only after waking up did he realise where exactly you both would meet. The verge on which enemies would meet to battle. Where blood was spilled in the constantly ongoing war. The perimeter seemed in tact though, so you at least wouldn`t meet directly on a battlefield. One thing he did know now, however. You stood on opposing sides, Demons against Stigma, darkness against light, him versus you. How cruel to put you so far away from him, Meliodas mused. But if he had to he knew who to betray and who to stay loyal to. 

You spend the next days searching for the exact place you two would meet, ignoring the suspicious stares and whispers about, oh, look, the hybrid is slacking of, no wonder. You wondered how they`d react to your soulmate who was undeniably on the opposite force of the conflict. You supposed one of you would have to switch sides and if you couldn`t convince them than you would have to do so. Though with how they ended up emotionally before you interacted you hoped they would agree with you. Even if the others were against it, the higher ups respected your hard work and if that didn`t work you`d ask Elizabeth, who always seemed hesitant about the war and disliked judging others no matter who they were, for help. 

Either way, you thought, being prepared wouldn`t hurt. After finally finding the place you hid a small bag full of important belongings and necessities in the trunk of the hollow tree along with a small gift you hoped your soulmate would appreciate. Following the thickening of your bond you had started to feel other and smaller sensations of them and while you were quite distressed with how often they seemed to fight, you couldn`t deny the feeling of joy when you drank a wine and instantly knew that they liked it, having had a faint taste of it. Hoping that this time you could enjoy it together you made sure the bottle was secure before heading of again.

Every time the weather was like the one in your vision, your and their hope grew and while you reached the place in no time, having memorised the way, they still hadn’t found it. Meliodas wished to fly over the forest but he had seen himself walking and knew that was the only way to get to you. So he wandered around, over and over and when he finally recognised a turn he followed the path eagerly. It took a bit to notice your presence, it being hidden seeing as anything else would be suicide so close to a hostile region. He rushed through the trees, his and yours excitement mixing and growing as you waited, peering through the woods in hopes of catching a glimpse, the first glimpse of the person you had grown to love.

The wind, his hearts and time itself stopped as he came to a halt in front of you. Your eyes were the first things he noticed, shining with a light that warmed him, overflowing with affection. You stared just as much, his black eyes turning into a beautiful shade of green as he lowered himself to the ground, his black wings disappearing from sight. You did the same, letting your feet touch the earth below you before moving one in front of the other. The grin on your face widened as he did the same and before you knew it he wrapped his arms around you.

“Hello“, you whispered. All former thoughts and ideas on your first words spoken to him seeming too far away to speak now, all you could do was great him. He was so warm, his arms protectively shielding you away from a world that was to cruel to a wonderful being like you, he decided, as he responded in the same manner. His hearts were finally beating again and were much faster now.  

“My name is Meliodas“, he added, chin comfortably resting on your shoulders, eyes closed and melting into your embrace. It felt so right to finally have you. You fitted perfectly into his grasp, his eyes fluttering open and a smile tugging on his lips as he heard your name. You were finally here, with him. Meliodas knew in this moment he could never let you go. He would follow you wherever you wanted to and destroy anyone that dared and try harm you, no matter the consequences, as long as he could be with you, the one who cared and comforted him, the one that was made for him and the one he was made for, his soulmate.

[hookingminor]

three lessons - mat barzal

a/n: new series idea I just had, spoiler there is filth and the next parts will be as well also im not the best at writing smut so you’ll have to bear with me here. anyway! let me know what you think! comments/thoughts are always appreciated! also, I know it briefly mentions being the younger sister of a teammate, but I know nothing about the isles so its literally just for plot purposes don’t expect much from that and this isn’t proofread sorry

word count: 4.2k

summary: you’re tired of being a virgin, so you hit up Mat to help you with your problem and strike a deal

warnings (18+): loss of virginity, smut

PART TWO

-

This was by far the worst idea you’ve ever had.

In your twenty-one years of life, you’ve never had a worse idea. Your initial plan was crazy in and of itself, but adding Mat to the mix? It’s like you were asking to get your ass kicked.

The original thought came to you a year ago when you were sitting on the couch of your friend’s apartment, four glasses of wine into the night. She was complaining about her latest hookup, raging over the fact that he didn’t know where the clit was.

This is how it usually went between you two.

She was the one who got all the guys, the one who could pick up anyone from the bar and spend the night in a stranger’s bed without a second thought. You, however, were the wingwoman, the person who was left behind when your friend eventually decided to leave with a man.

It didn’t bother you that much. It’s not like you felt like you needed a boyfriend, you were secure in almost all aspects of your life, but the nagging thought in the back of your mind kept saying that you needed to get fucked. And soon.

Maybe it was the alcohol coursing through your bloodstream or the fact that you hadn’t masturbated in nearly two weeks, but you rolled your eyes at your friend before you finally snapped.

“At least you’ve had someone to fuck the past few months! Be grateful you’re not me and still a virgin at twenty!” You shouted, fed up with hearing stories about how your friend’s sex life was so terrible. At least she had a sex life to begin with.

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry,” you apologized quickly, bringing your hand to cover your mouth in shock, “I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry, it’s just… it’s hard listening to you talk about this when I can’t contribute to the conversation.”

“No, you’re right. I’m sorry for always talking about it,” your friend said, eyes softening when she heard how regretful you sounded, “How about we change the subject?”

She didn’t wait for your response before launching into a monologue about how classes were going and her upcoming finals. You tried listening to her, but your mind was still stuck on the previous topic. Of course it was unfortunate that you happened to be twenty and with no sexual experience, but it didn’t bother you before like it was bothering you right now.

Ideas began racing through your head of how you could rectify this, and that’s when the seed was planted.

Now, almost a year later, your carefully thought out plan was almost complete; though, ‘carefully’ could be more loosely translated to ‘reckless.’

You paced outside of Mat’s door, walking back and forth as you fiddled with your hands, working up the courage to knock. This was such a bad idea. You brought your hand up to the door, pausing before your fist made contact before bringing it back down and resuming your pacing.

After another five minutes of deep contemplation, you made your decision. You knocked on the door before you could second guess yourself, now bringing your hands to tug at the strands of your hair.

The few seconds it took for Mat to answer the door felt like a lifetime, and when he opened the door, you were met with a confused look.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” He asked, peeking his head out of the door to glance down the hallway.

“Hi, I know you weren’t expecting me and you have to leave for practice soon, but I needed to talk to you about something,” you explained quickly.

Mat’s brows stayed furrowed in confusion, but he opened the door further to let you inside.

“Firstly, I just wanted to say that Anders doesn’t know I’m here, and I’d really appreciate it if you never mentioned it to him,” you said as he closed the door behind you.

Mat ushered you into his living room, gesturing for you to take a seat on the couch as he crossed his arms and waited for you to continue.

“This is going to sound absolutely crazy and you’re probably going to reject me but just hear me out,” you said, taking a deep sigh. He was totally going to shut you down, but there was no turning back now.

“I wanted to ask you if you’d have sex with me. You’d be doing me a favor as my friend. I’m kind of… a virgin… and I really don’t want to be anymore,” you took a breath to watch his reaction which was unreadable, “You’re probably thinking it’s a terrible idea, being that I’m Anders’s sister and everything, but I promise I won’t say anything to him. I just want to get a little experience under my belt… it’s kind of embarrassing. Anyway, I just wanted to ask if you’d give me a few lessons or something.”

You raised your eyes to meet Mat’s as you finished your rant, worrying about what he was going to say. A long silence fell between you two as he processed what you said.

“Uh… I don’t really know what to say,” he started awkwardly, bringing his hand to rub at the back of his neck, “I’m honored, I guess? That you asked me to help, but I’m just a little confused since we don’t really know each other.”

Okay, you could give him that. It was true that you weren’t the closest of friends, but you’d met on a handful occasions. It’s not like you were complete strangers, but other than knowing what you were studying in school and that you were Anders’s much younger sister, he didn’t know much about you.

“That’s fair,” you said, “I asked you because, well, you’re obviously hot which I’m sure you know. Also, not knowing each other is what makes this perfect. I’m not attached to you in any way and vice versa. Honestly? You’re one of the few guys in town that I feel comfortable around, so it was either ask you or find a random Tinder hookup and have to do this speech all over again but ten times as awkward.”

Mat didn’t like the last part of that explanation: the whole ‘random Tinder hookup to take your virginity’ part. He may not have known you that well, but he knew you were a nice girl and deserved to be more than just a notch on the bedpost of someone who didn’t care about you.

“I know you’re probably thinking I’m insane, and I get it. I felt a little insane when I thought about this too. But I really feel like you’re the best option. I understand if you think it’s too weird, though,” you said when he hadn’t replied. Your eyes watched him as he sat still as a rock across from you.

“I… I have to leave for practice soon,” was the only thing he responded with.

You felt your heart drop at his statement. Of course he was going to say no, you were an idiot for even trying.

“Yeah, totally, I’ll get going,” you said quickly, gathering your stuff and making your way to the entrance.

When you reached the door, you turned back one last time to see him still in the same position.

“Can you not tell Anders, please? I know this was a crazy, stupid idea but… just don’t tell him, okay? He doesn’t need to know about my sex… well, lack of sex life,” you added before shutting the door behind you.

-

Mat had lost his mind.

Truly and honestly, he had lost his mind if he was even considering your proposition. Which he was. He was really considering your proposition, and he wanted to punch himself for it.

He couldn’t possibly agree to this, could he? You were the captain’s younger sister. Sure, you two weren’t the closest of siblings, but the code still applied. And the code clearly said he was not allowed to fraternize with relatives of his teammates in any way. He hadn’t broken this rule yet, and he couldn’t believe he was even thinking about breaking it now.

Inside his head, he weighed the pros and the cons of sleeping with you. Well, teaching you would be a better phrase. If Mat was being honest, he had blacked out after the terms ‘virgin’ and ‘have sex with me’ fell from your lips. He watched you from his spot on the couch, his eyes following your mouth but not processing the words you were saying. Truthfully, he ran over the conversation a million times in his head and he wasn’t sure he was actually processing them now.

You wanted him to take your virginity. You wanted him to give you experience. You called them lessons.

You were, quite literally, asking him to be your sex tutor.

When you left the apartment, he did what he did best. He compartmentalized. Instead of thinking about the awkward conversation he just had with you, he pushed all thoughts of you from his mind and went to practice. For a whole three hours he focused on hockey. He even had the courage to look at his captain despite the weird interaction he’d just had with his sister.

But then practice was over, and Mat was left with nothing to do but think about what you said. Thinking turned into contemplating, and contemplating eventually turned into pulling up your Instagram page.

Mat typed and retyped the message a million times, deleting it before he could accidentally pressed send. He went back and forth between wanting to say yes and throwing his phone as far away from him so he wouldn’t be tempted.

What could be the worst thing that happened? He thought.

A million bad things could happen. He knew this deep in his heart that it was, for all intents and purposes, the worst idea ever to teach his captain’s sister how to have sex, but his head and desire to get laid had other plans.

So, he picked up his phone one last time and composed the same message he’d written a hundred times.

to @yourusername: does your offer still stand? text me 212-203-3849

-

For the second time in a week, you were pacing outside of Mat’s apartment. You’d received his message almost six days ago, and now here you were.

Your chest nearly collapsed with relief when you’d seen he wanted to take you up on your offer. And then your stomach filled with butterflies, nerves wracking your body as you now had an official plan to lose your virginity.

You eagerly liked the message, dialing his number in your phone so you could hash out the details over text. He promised you two would go over some ground rules in person, saying it felt too weird to have a written contract or something over text. You agreed to his plans and set a date to go over to his apartment that following weekend.

Feeling more courageous than you did a week ago, you knocked on the door with confidence this time. If you were going to lose your virginity tonight, you weren’t going to look like a frightened kitten when you did.

Mat greeted you with a warm smile this time, his eyes lighting up when he saw you. Same as last time, he ushered you into his apartment and directed you towards his couch.

“Do you want anything to drink? I was about to open a bottle of wine,” Mat asked, already moving to the kitchen.

“Yeah, wine would be great. Thanks,” you replied, taking a seat on the edge of the couch.

Mat tinkered around in the kitchen for a couple minutes before he joined you, handing you a glass of red. You took a long sip as he settled down, hoping the wine would work fast to calm your nerves.

“So, what did you want to discuss first?” He asked after a moment.

“Well, we should probably have some ground rules. I was thinking that since you’re the expert and all, you should decide how these lessons go. Oh, and I think that we should keep this to a three-time thing. Anything more than that will probably get more complicated,” you answered with ease. Not to say you had spent the past week thinking about what you were going to say, but you definitely did.

Mat nodded in agreement at your suggestions before adding his own.

“Yeah, that sounds good. Also, we can’t tell anyone about this because, you know, your brother and the team and all,” he said. You hummed in response, that much was a given. No one could know about this.

“So, where do we start? Should I take off my clothes or?” You asked.

“No,” he said with a chuckle, “We’re going to watch a movie.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it. For now at least.”

You hadn’t known what you were expecting, but it was not a cuddle session on his couch. You imagined that maybe he would’ve just ripped your clothes off the minute you walked in to get down to business, but he was being way more casual than you were feeling. Which was probably a good thing because your heart was beating a thousand beats a minute, so at least one of you had this situation under control.

Mat had told you to dress comfortably as he didn’t plan on leaving the apartment, and he was dressed in a similar fashion as you: gray sweatpants with a dark blue t-shirt. You had thrown on a pair of leggings and a shirt from your college before leaving, making sure to wear at least a nice bralette and pair of panties underneath.

He drank down the rest of his wine before adjusting himself on the couch, moving into a position where he was laying down. Grabbing the blanket folded on the back cushion, he spread it out over his body before patting the spot in front of him. Normally, you would’ve been intimidated by a bold move like this, but the wide smile on his face indicated that he was perfectly comfortable right now, and his ease surrounded you in waves.

Slamming back the rest of your wine, you lay down in front of him, tucking your body against his while his arms pulled your chest closer.

“Anything specific you want to watch?” He asked, using his free hand to grab the remote. You muttered a quiet ‘no,’ allowing him to go ahead and choose. Mat scrolled through the Netflix options before settling on a new action movie.

“So, how much experience do you have exactly?” Mat asked once the introduction credits had finished. It was a good thing he wasn’t looking at you because your face heated up in embarrassment.

“I’ve only ever got as far as making out,” you muttered.

“No one’s ever touched you then?” He prodded.

“No,” you replied, your cheeks on fire. You couldn’t see him, but Mat nodded in response against the back of your head, letting out a quiet ‘okay.’

It wasn’t the first time Mat had been with a virgin, but that hadn’t been since high school and when he also wasn’t that experienced himself. Mat decided to let the movie play for a little bit longer before making his first move.

That time came when there was a particularly slow scene on. Slowly, he lifted up the hem of your t-shirt and slid his hand underneath, tracing small circles on the skin of your stomach. You clenched your thighs together as a warm feeling started to spread throughout your body.

It was happening.

Mat kept his hands there for a few minutes, inching up so slowly you almost couldn’t tell he’d moved at all. When the initial shock of his touch settled, you tried to refocus your attention to the movie.

Another ten minutes passed before Mat made his next move. Almost imperceptibly, he used his elbow to push his torso up before he brushed the hair covering your neck to the side. You felt his fingertips brush your ear, a shiver running up your spine. He brought his lips to your neck a split second later, placing a soft kiss against it.

Your eyes briefly shut for a second, reveling in the fact that Mat’s lips were on your neck. He kissed around your jaw a couple times before the hand on his stomach was shifting you to rest on your back. Your body followed his lead and your eyes met his hazel ones before he was leaning in to kiss your lips.

A heat unfurled in your body the second your lips connected and you eagerly moved yours against his. One of Mat’s hands had moved to the back of your neck to tilt your head at a better angle, the other hand moving further up under your shirt to rest just below your bra clasp. Your body involuntarily arched up into his hands as his tongue slipped out to part your lips. You opened your mouth and his tongue entered immediately, tangling with yours. You and Mat lay on the couch for a good while, making out heavily before you eventually had to break it for air.

“At least you don’t have to worry about kissing. You’re a natural,” Mat commended with an airy chuckle, and you couldn’t help but laugh at his compliment.

Mat’s smile brightened at your laugh before he leaned back in, the heat building in your body at double speed. You knew you were attracted to him, but you didn’t think he would be able to wind you up this fast. Or maybe it was just because you’ve never had a man touch you like this before.

Breaking the kiss, Mat began to trail more kisses down your body, pausing near your collarbone when he heard a particular breathy gasp leave your mouth. Mat continued his path over your shirt until he reached your belly button.

“Can I take this off?” He asked, looking up at you.

“You can take mine off if you take yours off,” you replied with a seductive smirk. Mat pulled back from your body, matching your smirk with one of his own as he tore off his shirt. Less than a second later, he was tugging at the hem of yours, urging you to sit up so he could take it off.

Mat’s hands were back on your body right after he tossed your shirt on the floor. This time, he retraced his path down your torso with his mouth and tongue, leaving no patch of skin untouched. His fingers danced around the edge of your leggings, teasing you until you were lifting up your hips into his face.

“Please take them off, Mat,” you said through gasps, wanting nothing more than to be rid of your clothing. He chuckled lightly against your waistband, his nose tickling your abdomen before he began shimmying off your leggings.

Tilting your hips up, you helped him slide the pants down your legs along with your underwear. Though your cheeks flamed up at the thought of being exposed before Mat, you felt oddly calm (well, as calm as you can be given the circumstances) with him.

“Holy shit, baby. You’re soaked,” Mat noted with a deep groan. He shuffled his body further down the couch into a comfortable position, lifting one leg to hook over his shoulder.

You breathed in shaky breaths as Mat placed gentle kisses on your thighs, working upwards slowly until he reached your core. And when he used his tongue to lick a strip across your pussy, your back arched into the air as you let out a loud moan.

“You gotta stay still, Y/N,” Mat chuckled darkly, wrapping one hand to steady your middle.

“Sorry, never done this before,” you replied in gasps.

Now immobilized, Mat resumed his place between your legs, repeating the same series of licks before he closed his lips around your clit. He flicked his tongue across the sensitive area. God, you would have done this a long time ago if you knew it would feel this good. You weren’t sure if it was too early to feel the heat inside you build up this quickly or if Mat was just too good at this. You hoped it was the latter.

His tongue lapped at your folds, and your hands flew down to grasp his hair in need. You didn’t think you could moan any louder, but then he brought his thumb to your clit to rub in tight circles as his tongue teased your entrance.

“Holy fuck,” you whined out, canting your hips up as much as you could. You could feel his smirk against your pussy at your exclamation, bringing his hand down to slowly enter a finger into you.

You let out a surprised gasp as you felt the first finger penetrate you. Mat kept his attention on your clit, lips sucking harshly at it. You let yourself get lost in the pleasure, focusing on how good he was making you feel.

After a few thrusts of one finger, giving you plenty of time to adjust, he added a second, feeling your walls tighten around them. He moved both fingers in and out of you, alternating the pressure between your entrance and clit. Just when he hit the right spot inside you, your hand tugged on his hair tightly, and he took the hint to curl his fingers against that spot.

“I’m so close, Mat,” you moaned, tossing your head back into the pillow.

“What do you need, baby?” He asked, pulling back for a quick breath. You glanced down to meet his gaze, taking in the way his chin glistened from your pussy. The view made you moan lowly, and his eyes darkened at the sound.

“Your tongue, please,” you begged quietly.

Mat heard the words leave your mouth and nestled his face back between your legs, tongue sliding up your slit in response. In rhythm with stroking your g-spot, he sucked at your clit, and it was mere seconds before your body coiled tightly inside. He kept the same pace and before long, you felt yourself crest the peak and then fall.

Mat removed his fingers slowly from your entrance, his tongue licking softly at your folds until he felt your breathing return to normal. It took you a few seconds to regain your sense of self, stars still whirling in the corners of your vision. When you finally felt yourself grounded on Earth again, you opened your eyes to see a self-satisfied smirk on Mat’s face.

“You’re so hot when you come,” he said when you met his gaze, and had you not been riding high on cloud nine when he said this, you might have blushed in embarrassment. But you weren’t embarrassed right now. The only thing you felt was giddy. Giddy because you were one step closer to your end goal.

And while you were blissed out, you dropped your gaze to notice the extremely visible bulge tenting in his sweatpants. Focused on a new task, you sat up quickly before leaning over Mat’s body so you could return the favor. Your lips crashed against his in a frenzy, your hands clumsily reaching down to grasp his length. However, you only got to feel it for a second before Mat’s hand was tugging it away.

“Not tonight, babe. Tonight was about you,” Mat said with a strained voice, breaking the kiss to look at you.

“What do you mean? We’re not having sex tonight?” You asked in confusion, your head still a little hazy from the orgasm.

“No, we’re not,” he laughed, noticing the wantonness in your voice, “You said I’m in charge, right? This was already a lot for one night, so we’ll put off the sex until next time.”

You nodded your head, though you weren’t really understanding. It made sense. Tonight was a very big step for you, and he didn’t want to give you too much at once. But despite that, your pussy was begging for a repeat performance and you were so far gone you were willing to do just about anything Mat would say.

“What about you, though?” You asked, glancing down to the noticeable tent.

“I’ll be fine, I promise. We still have two more lessons. There’s plenty of time for that later,” he replied, though the bulge between you seemed to say otherwise.

“Promise you’re okay?” You insisted.

“I swear, Y/N,” he said with a chuckle.

A comfortable silence fell between you after that, and you couldn’t help the wide smile that spread across your face. Your eyes sparkled with renewed purpose, and you felt satisfied for the first time in a long time. A smile of Mat’s own slowly appeared on his face as he watched you light up before him. Before you could stop yourself, you threw yourself into him, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck.

“Thank you, Mat. Thank you, thank you, thank you,” You said happily, punctuating each ‘thank you’ with a loud smacking kiss on his cheek.

When you pulled back to give him that award-winning smile again, Mat had one thought.

He was totally fucked.

[amysteriousmessenger]

Hey im kinda late, but... Do you mind writing snowball fight with reader + rfa + V and saeran? If that's too much to ask, then its okay love! Oh, its kinda late but merry holiday, or christmas if you celebrate it! May your holidays be blessed and filled with only happiness and love 😽😽. Here, take all your loves you deserve!

AAAAA this is so kind of you, thank so much and a happy holidays to you too!! <3 You’re always so lovely to me! I’m sorry that I’m posting this on Boxing Day, but I hope it’s still okay for you!

RFA and Reader Snowball Fight Headcanons

Yoosung Kim Snowball Fight Headcanons 

You would have been visiting Yoosung at his university over Christmas, it has already started to heavily snow whilst you were on your way so by the time you actually got there, the snow had fallen to several inches. 

Yoosung was so excited about the snow, it reminds him of when he was young and would make snowmen in the garden with his Rika and his sister. He’d look a little crestfallen thinking about it, and you offered to build a snowman outside on campus with him. 

The two of you built the snowman together, dressing it in a scarf and sending silly pictures of the three of you to the RFA chat. It was then, as Yoosung was trying to take his own selfie with it, that you launched a snowball right into the back of his head and he caught it on camera. 

He feels so betrayed, pouting as he looked at you with big puppy eyes. 

He won’t retaliate until you laugh and begin scrambling to craft another snowball, at which point Yoosung with try to hide behind the snowman as a shield. He has to fight back, his time on LOLOL has trained him for this. 

He throws a few snowballs out from behind the snowman, and then gets hit with one in the face when he peeks around to see if any made contact with you. 

He’s laughing and having fun as you throw the snow, and it continues for a few minutes until you’ve tired yourselves out and return to his dorm for a hot shower and warm hot chocolate.

Zen/Hyun Ryu Snowball Fight Headcanons 

The two of you would be on a winter date in the park. Zen was marvelling at how the pure white snow compliments his air, and makes the red of his eyes stand out against the crisp background and how th- Bam. You hit him on the side of the head with a snowball, instantly silencing his handsome spiel. 

‘Jagiya! How could you do that to m-’ Bam, another one hitting him in the shoulder. He watched as you giggled, scrambling to gather enough snow for another attack and his heart just melted, he can’t stay mad at you. But, he also can’t lose: his ego would not allow it. 

He grabs a fistful of snow and starts chasing you through the thick snow, his trousers are getting a little wet but he doesn’t mind, you’re having fun. You turn back mid-run to throw another snowball at him, but miss. Zen takes this opportunity to throw his own snowball at you, hitting you on the ass and earning a smirk from him. 

You try to throw more, but Zen runs for fun, there’s no way that you could overtake him. You manage to get a few more snowballs thrown in his general direction but the majority of them miss and you somehow strumble and fall backwards into the snow as he got close.

Zen tried to stop himself falling, he really did, but the snow was heavy on his feet and he ended up falling on top of you, caging your body with his own.

After the initial moment of distress, he couldn’t help but think how beautiful you looked with the snowflakes falling into your hair and on your eyelashes. He leaned in and planted a kiss onto the corner of your mouth, his lips slightly cold from the weather. 

The two of you smiled, and then you scooped up a handful of loose snow and threw the dusting into his face. 

Jaehee Kang Snowball Fight Headcanons 

You were hard-pushed to get Jaehee to go out in the cold weather, she was too busy and didn’t particularly fancy getting her clothes wet. After enough pleading, she finally relented and agreed to make a snowman with you as long as it didn’t take too long. 

The two of you made a small snowman together, and gave it a small ponytail. You sent a picture of it to the RFA chat with the simple caption ‘Snowzen’.

She would be getting ready to go back inside to make coffee when you hit her in the back of her shoulder with a snowball.

After a brief moment of disbelief followed by a sigh, Jaehee would wait until you weren’t looking to quickly grab some snow and throw it at you. Obviously, she missed. 

But that still instigated a war. You grinned.

You both started gathering snow and throwing it at one another: yours in attack, Jaehee’s in defense. It wasn’t often that she got to loosen up, so you were happy to see her laughing on this rare occasion. 

Snowzen got beheaded in the fight. 

Saeyoung Choi in a snowball fight Headcanons 

Firstly, it’s not a snowball fight, it’s war. 

Seven would have been working into the early hours of the morning when he realised it was snowing and had an absolutely awful idea for a prank.

He went out into his garden, calmly grabbed a fistful of snow, took his time on his way back inside to smooth it into a perfectly spherical ball, prayed, and then launched it into your sleeping face from across the room and fucking bolted.

He knew he was a deadman. You sent in a text demanding that he meet you outside in twenty minutes to settle the score like men. 

Once the smug bastard comes out, you immediately throw a snowball into his face but he ducked, so your snowball missed the target. You forgot he had physical training from the agency and realised this was going to be a lot more difficult than you originally thought.

You weren’t even sure how he manages to make so many snowballs in such a small amount of time  but in the time it takes it you to craft three, he’s got twice as many done and he’s beginning to propel them at you. 

There were about twenty minutes of all-out warfare, with Seven doing dramatic leaps behind bushes and rolls to escape your attacks, all whilst managing to hit you with practically every snowball he threw. 

You were so happy to see him having such fun, knowing that he never got to do this as a child.

It was safe to say he won the snowball fight, and had to give you pouty kisses afterwards to make up for his prank. 

Jumin Han Snowball Fight Headcanons

Jumin had never been in a snowball fight before and isn’t entirely sure what he’s supposed to be doing, so he sends you a wary look when you threw a snowball at him, hitting him in the chest. He had come outside onto the rooftop terrace to admire the scenic snow on the city with you, and you assault him? He is offended.

‘____, what are you doing? You’re going to get my suit wet an-’ You threw another one into his leg followed up with the sweetest, most innocent look you could muster. He sighed. He resigned himself to humouring you, since it would clearly make you happy and he was always one to indulge you.

You explained to him what he was supposed to do and he asked for a practice shot, which you were unwilling to give him. 

Jumin’s aim was absolutely terrible and he mentions making a note to practice such things as this imperfection should be ironed out and- you threw another one at him. He smirked and gave you a look, before attempting to throw more of the snowballs he had delicately crafted at you and even managed to hit a few on your thighs and stomach.

Despite not particularly caring for such activities himself, he enjoyed seeing this playful side of you, even if it was a bit cheeky.

Jihyun Kim/V Snowball Fight Headcanons

The two of you would be out early in the morning so V could take pictures of the sunrise hitting the untouched snow, reflecting the beautiful colours of the scenery. 

V also decided that he wanted some pictures of you in the same setting, with your long flowing dressing gown settled softly atop the snow. Of course, you indulged him.

After a few minutes of him taking your picture, you noticed he had smiled and was satisfied with his images for today. He turned to put his camera down on the table and take a sip of his coffee when something cold and wet exploded on the back of his head. It was a snowball.

It’s a little difficult for him to imagine himself in a snowball fight since he can’t see brilliantly and he feels like his aim will be off, but he’s more than willing to try since you wanted to play. 

You run over to help him down the steps and into the large garden before you retreated back to your original position. You kept it fair though and stayed in his field of vision.

V wasn’t usually one to let off steam in such a way, so he seemed a little tense at first and didn’t throw the snowballs too hard in fear of accidentally hurting you. He missed more than he landed, so you were definitely winning the snowball fight.

He didn’t mind though, he was far more invested in the sight he saw before him: the adorning smile on your face, the red flush of your cheeks from the cold, snowflakes clinging to your hair and your dressing gown flowing against the breeze behind you as you ran. He could never capture such beauty if he tried.

Saeran Choi Snowball Fight Headcanons

Saeran doesn’t really enjoy the cold weather, it chills him straight to the bones so he either needs to wrap up in a bundle of layers otherwise he can’t stay out in it for very long. 

However, the boy must go and buy his ice-cream from the convenience store since his ‘idiot brother’ ate the last of it without ordering more. You offered to go for him, since you were worried about him slipping and hurting himself, but he didn’t know which flavour he wanted, so you decided to accompany him instead. 

The both of you were almost back at Seven’s when you got the idea to start a snowball fight, so you suddenly grabbed some snow and threw it at Saeran, hitting him in the shoulder. 

He turned around and was both confused and annoyed, demanding to know why you hit him. You were also confused at his annoyance, but it quickly dawned on you that he didn’t know what a snowball fight was. He’d never had the chance to do it. He was never allowed out when he was a child and even if he had, he would have been too sickly to go out playing in the snow anyway. 

You explained it to him and his expression softened when he realised it was a playful activity, and that he should try making up for the lost time. Saeran awkwardly knelt down, collected some snow and stiffly threw it back at you in the hip. He seemed nervous to make sure he was doing it correctly and looked at you for affirmation. You smiled and laughed, encouraging him to do it again as you collected more snow. 

It was a very small, soft start for him.

Bonus: When the two of you got back to Seven’s house, his brother came to the door to plead Saeran’s forgiveness and asked if you got him any snacks from the shop, and was immediately met with a snowball to the face from Saeran. 

[frillshark-fr]

How do you get people to always buy your dragons? Genuine question

i was gonna say something like “haha i have no fucking clue” but that would be a lie i think about this a lot actually so i might have some insights i’ve been breeding dragons as my primary activity on FR since i started playing FR (in 2014...) and people have only started actually buying dragons from me consistently like, 5-6 months ago, despite 2-3 attempts at running a genuine hatchery onsite that always died due to lack of interest & not really being worth the effort. 

so ive thought a lot about what the hell is happening now and why my dragons are suddenly consistently selling and I think ive come down to these being the main points of advice i can give: 1. make friends! be friendly! don’t be weird! be a cool and fun person to interact with! 2. post consistently. post your dragons consistently. post about other stuff consistently. just be an active member of the community 3. POST YOUR SHIT IN THE “#FLIGHT RISING” TAG. THIS IS PROBABLY THE ONLY TRUELY HELPFUL THING I SAY IN THIS POST 4. make pairs that are sexy as hell and be openly proud of them. make dragons and pairs that you like, not what you think will necessarily sell. people can tell when you like stuff and being genuinely passionate about something, whatever the fuck it is, will get other people passionate as well longer versions/explanations under the cut because man this got a mile long. i wasn’t kidding when i said i think about this a lot and i am so sorry if you wanted something concise and useful

1. to be a little glib. i am mutuals/friends with more clout in the FR community than I do kjdshfdsfdhjhkfdf shoutout to everyone who draws their dragons really good on a regular basis because i am riding on your coattails to sell my dragons. i love you this was never my intent, obviously! DO NOT BEFRIEND PEOPLE BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU WILL GET STUFF FROM THEM IT’S JUST A REALLY BAD THING TO DO TO PEOPLE!!! i wouldn’t be friends w/ people if i didn’t genuinely like and get along with them! no amount of pixel cash is worth putting up with people you dont like or abusing people you admire!  but i’d also somehow feel wrong to just... neglect mentioning this factor. idk it’s probably a self-esteem thing sjdkgfhdsf i just Don’t feel like my #success has been totally out of my own effort because its not like im #hustling or whatever i just posted dragons and stuff happened

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2. being consistent! just. posting consistently! posting Every Hatchling I Have and Talking About Them On Tumblr!  Once I had a couple nests just sell super fast likely due to aforementioned clout, i was emboldened to just post more of my nests more often and I swear this has more effect than anything else. i just needed the self-esteem boost to Start Doing That posting consistently makes ppl follow u for ur content which gets even more people to look at your dragons which gets more people to buy your dragons.

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2a. Also just post a lot in general, even if you aren’t necessarily posting about your dragons for sale. it definitely helps! just be friendly and active and people will come

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3. post your shit in the tag. not in “#dragon-sales” or “#fr-dragon-sales” or anything weird like that because I don’t know if anyone actually looks at those, but people definitely browse “#flight rising”. no matter how many followers you have, more people will see your content if you post it in #flight rising than if you just chuck it into the void. 

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3a. however! do not put links into the post if you want it to actually show up in the tag. tumblr is cool in that it doesn’t actually matter that much when you post something, the same way it really matters on twitter bc twitter has algorithms that decide for you what it thinks you want to be seeing whereas tumblr just shows you everything in chronological order. if you post something into the tag at 1am... it will still be there at 2pm when people log on and start scrolling.

the only thing tumblr seems to consistently hide from a tag (and possibly a dashboard, but idk) are posts with links in them, as a half-assed attempt to limit spam. instead of linking to your sales tab/to the dragons directly in the post, reblog it with the links instead. to reduce latency between a post going up and the links being available, i type out the links in the initial post, cut them, post the thing into the tag, then very quickly reblog, paste the links, and post the reblog jdhfsdf. i don’t know if that benefits anything really? but it can sometimes take me a while to type links, so if i posted, pressed reblog, typed up all the links, then posted, it’d be like ~15 minutes where someone may see the post, think “oh i would like to buy those dragons”, then can’t find the link, think “oh well, i will just find it later”, scroll on, and just... completely forget about it. so uh. go quick?

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3b. the armchair sociologist in me also thinks self-reblogging has the added benefit of like... you know how people are more likely to tip a barista when a dollar is already in the tip jar? or how people are more likely to take one of those little tabs on a flyer if one of them is already missing? i think that works with notes, too. i don’t know why i think that or why it happens i just swear once a post gets 1 note, suddenly it gets Even More Notes, and if it doesn’t get any notes for a while it will sit at 0 notes until the end of time. so giving yourself 1 obligatory note makes people more likely to interact. i think

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4. all of these are hard to quantify but this one is especially so: have cool and unique dragons. make your pairs sexy as hell. don’t put all your eggs (hah) into the one basket of selling dragons that are technically “popular”. we have all seen triple white/triple obsidian/triple orca/triple any other popular colors and cherub/pere/stained or wasp/bee/glim pthahlos or whatever. they’re pretty! we get it! but everyone has had one and everyone has had those pairs and market for dragons like that can be super oversaturated. try to break free from that and sell dragons that people can only get from you. I can’t tell you what to do though bc that rly depends on you. make pairs that you find exciting or interesting and people will feel that. i have a very specific theme and aesthetic that i don’t feel like is especially common on FR and i am genuinely very enthusiastic about it. marine shit is my Thing:tm: both on and off FR and dragons are one of my many ways of expressing that   if you have a Thing:tm:, either some fr-centric aesthetic (like being super into plague or earth or light or something) or something more general (such as any of the -punks or -cores)... just fuckin roll with it honestly. if you’re goth? make got h dragons. like scene stuff that looks straight out of a middle school in 2010? rock that hot-topic lair. outdoorsey type? make dragons that look like you’d meet them on a hike in the woods. it really works with anything!  people can tell when you really love something and i know that seeing someone really love something, even if it’s not necessarily MY thing, makes me really excited too!! 

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4a. never show fear. people can smell fear. never be like “well this one isn’t that good” because suddenly now you’ve planted the idea that it’s ugly in other people’s heads when they may have really liked it had you not accidentally suggested to them that it’s an ugly dragon. people are EXTREMELY suggestible to even VERY minor cues so be always a little bit bolder than you think you should be you’d be surprised at how many times ive been like “eh, this one’s kind of a dud, i’ll probably have to exalt this one when the auction expires” and then that hatchling is the first to sell. never ever ever ever decide what other people like for them. always act like your dragons are the hottest shit in all the land and Believe It. this is what people mean when they say “fake it till you make it”

- 4b. also, idk if it’s true of everyone but it’s really off-putting to see someone having serious pity-parties for themselves, on sales posts or otherwise. ive had bad experiences with people who are uncomfortably quick to self-depreciate (because they were using their genuine self-hatred to manipulate me or my friends), so i might be a little more trigger-happy about avoiding this behavior than others, but don’t weaponize your sadness to guilt people into doing what you want. it’s really not cool.

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okay i think that’s my entire manifesto on how i do dragon selling. anon i am so sorry im sure you were expecting like “believe in yourself :)” and here i am dissecting dragon selling like it’s a frog in a science class

edit: AFTER ALL THAT I STILL THOUGHT OF ONE MORE THING. It’s not really a Point, just a Reminder:

i don’t post about all the times i have to exalt dragons that don’t sell. you are seeing me being very selective about what i post. you dont sit and stare at my lair or click through offspring lists or check old sales posts. there are a lot of times where someone just doesn’t sell. even now when i’m selling stuff pretty consistently i will still sometimes have dragons that don’t sell for seemingly no reason. even dragons I think are sure to sell will sometimes just... not. and that’s ok! you gotta just be.. ok with that. it’s par for the course. i typically list dragons for 7 days on the AH, give them a couple more days after their auction expires (partially because i forget, partially to give them a grace period for people to pm/ask me about them), and then exalt them after that point. w/ some dragons that i don’t think got a fair shake for one reason or another (such as the sales post not showing up in the tag or something) i do a little clearance (like the halloween dragons i recently posted) but for the most part if they don’t sell, i just exalt them. 90% of the time i don’t even bother to level them up i just press the exalt button and call it a day. it’s fine

[lindberghtm]

          *  .  desirée lindbergh was spotted in the fashion district adorning prada platform chelsea boots , with some airpod pros on . they’re most likely listening to you know i'm no good by amy winehouse . you may know them as @desi or as that aisha potter  lookalike . their twenty first birthday just passed . while living in the upper east side  , they’ve gained a bit of a reputation . they’re known to be duplicitous but on the other hand reliable . wonder if they’ll be the next person to hit the headlines . ( cis female / she/her + c / 21+ / she/her )   .  

         hey  !!!!!!  i  was  planning  on  coming  thru  with  a  cool  intro  to  establish  myself  as  a ~ cool ~  person , but  covid  has  absolutely  ✨ decimated  ✨  my  social  skills  so  ,,,,,,,  this  is  what  im  left  with  .  anywho  hi  i’m  c  (  short  for  clown  tbfh  )  ,  im  21+  ,  from  the  rainy  ole’  pnw  ,  &  i  use  she / her  pronouns  .  i  was  in  wealthy  like  , , , ,  AGES  ago  &  tbh  i’ve  been  missing  it  real  bad  lately  so  here  i  am  with  a  brand  new  bitch  , , , , ,  ms  .  desi  lindbergh  🖤  i  just  finished  reading  the  girl  with  the  dragon  tattoo  so  you’ll  find  elements  from  that  novel  in  my  biography  like  the  names  ,  & the  general  ‘ company  comes  first ‘  &  ‘  no  one  gets  a  divorce  in  this  family ’  attitudes  .  but  hennyway  here’s  a  pinterest  board  ,  &  my  discord  is  𝐌 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐁#1264  (  the  best  tiktok  song  imo  )  .  my  bio  is  rambly  but  there  are  stats  at  the  top  ,  personality  &  wanted  connections  (  inc  .  this  sideblog  w  wanted  plots  )  at  the  bottom  !  xoxo

*  .  stats  .

full  name : desirée  ‘ desi ’  charlotte  lindbergh - montenegro

age : twenty - two

gender : cis  female

pronouns : she / her  

pob ; current  home : london  ,  england  ;  current  residence  in  tribeca  .

family : henrik  lindbergh  (  80  ,  deceased  ,  ceo  of  lindbergh  corporation  )  ;  miriam  montenegro  (  46  ,  lives  in  the  upper  east  side & london  ,  supermodel  turned  vindictive  widow  )  ;  no  siblings  or  pets  .

birthday : september  2  ,  1998  ;  virgo  sun  ,  taurus  moon  ,  cancer  rising .

career : heiress / model / daddy’s credit card swiper  .

drinking / drugs / smoking :  yes / no / occasionally .  

physical : aisha  potter  fc ,  dark  brown  mid - length  hair  ,  dark  brown  eyes  ,  no  tattoos  ,  two  ear  lobe  piercings  in  each  ear  ,  5 ′ 6 ″ .

*  .  character biography .

1998  : miriam  montenegro  ,  an  english  model  coming  from  a  humble  background  ,  made  it  big  when  she  was  scouted  for  runway  shows  ,  eventually  making  her  way  to  being  a  household  name  .  by  the  age  of  twenty  five  ,  she’d  found  love  (  or  ,  financial  comfort  ,  rather  )  with  the  fifty  nine  year  old  henrik  lindbergh  ,  a  swedish  business  magnate  whose  involvement  in  global  industrialization  spanned  far  wider  than  the  european  economy  .  the  relationship  took  the  world  by  surprise  ,  miriam’s  friends  being  far  more  involved  in  pop  culture  than  an  aged  man  .  while  she  claims  it  was  love  ,  the  world  had  already  made  up  its  mind  on  her  motive  —  money  .

the  pair  got  married  six  months  after  they  initially  became  involved  , & desi  was  born  a  year  after  .  her  father  ,  the  product  of  the  ‘  silent  generation  ‘  ,  was  of  the  impression  that  children  should  be  seen  ,  not  heard  ,  an  outdated  idea  that  her  mother  was  comfortable  abiding  by  .  desirée  ,  by  association  ,  quickly  became  accustomed  to  the  spotlight  ,  the  interest  in  the  uncommon  relationship  between  miriam & henrik  only  growing  after  the  birth  of  their  sole  child  .  desi  grew  up  a  prop  ,  a  toy  for  her  mother  to  dress  up  in  matching  outfits & parade  on  the  global  stage  ,  before  stepping  behind  closed  doors  &  forgetting  about  the  child  entirely  .  this  led  to  desi  being  raised  almost  exclusively  by  nannies  ,  her  mother  more  interested  in  savouring  the  last  of  her  youth & her  father  too  busy  with  his  international  duties  .    originally  based  in  london  ,  the  family  moved  to  new  york  when  desirée  was  starting  her  schooling  to  be  closer  to  the  hustle & bustle  of  american  life  .

2017  : desirée  is  graduating  high  school  a  year  early  after  having  been  sent  to  institut  auf  dem  rosenberg  ,  a  swiss  private  school  that  prides  itself  on  being  highly  exclusive∫ˆ  highly  expensive  .  the  name  was  a  selling  point  for  her  father  ,  but  more  importantly  she  would  be  safe & out  of  the  way  on  another  continent  while  her  parents  bickered  ceaselessly  .  desirée  found  herself  to  be  nothing  special  at  rosenberg  ,  her  identity  having  been  formed  on  the  idea  that  public  exposure  equated  to  popularity  ;  without  the  constant  public  eye  while  at  school  ,  desi  found  a  freedom & lightness  she  hadn’t  before  experienced  .  she  could  be  real  , & have  real  friends  , & not  be  putting  on  a  fake  smile  to  allude  an  air  of  comfort  .  most  of  all  ,  she  could  get  away  from  her  spiteful  mother  ,  who  ,  once  desi  hit  puberty  ,  saw  her  as  a  threat  to  her  own  beauty  ,  success  , & public  popularity  .  being  sent  to  private  school  was  the  best  thing  to  happen  to  desi & her  mother’s  relationship  .

after  graduating  ,  desirée  moved  back  to  new  york  city  ,  moving  back  into  the  expansive  upper  east  side  apartment  , & being  sure  to  move  into  a  room  on  the opposite side  of  the  home  from  her  parents  .  being  thrust  back  into  the  spotlight  ,  a  ‘  homecoming  ‘  of  sorts  that  her  mother  capitalized  on  ,  desi  fell  into  a  depression  .  she  feared  leaving  the  house  ,  she  feared  that  people  would  only  want  to  be  her  friend  in  order  to  access  the  family’s  wealth  (  a  seed  of  an  idea  planted  in  her  father  at  the  age  of  twelve  ,  when  she  was  told  there  was  to  be  no  dating  unless  their  family’s  net  worth  was  over  500  million  )  .  soon  enough  ,  though  ,  desi  made  the  choice  to  get  in  contact  with  her  mother’s  rival  modeling  agency  ,  inquiring  about  the  possibility  about  modeling  .  they  ,  of  course  ,  welcomed  the  legacy  with  open  arms  ;  her  mother  ,  however  ,  decided  that  this  deceipt  would  not  be  tolerated  under  her  roof  , & kicked  desi  out  as  soon  as  she’d  heard  .  desi  called  her  father  crying  ,  explaining  the  situation  over  the  phone  ,  who  immediately  created  a  separate  bank  account  of  her  own  for  desi  ,  secretly  hidden  away  in  an  overseas  bank  to  avoid  her  mother  finding  out  .  the  account  held  far  more  than  desirée  needed  ,  but  it  was  her  father  who  enabled  her  to  get  back  on  her  feet  ,  find  her  own  home  , & start  a  career  for  herself  .  

2020 : desirée  hardly  speaks  to  her  mother  ,  though  they  keep  up  the  public  illusion  that  they  are  as  close  as  a  mother  -  daughter  duo  can  be  .  her  father  though  ,  now  80  years  old  ,  was  actually  close  with  desi  ,  the  two  catching  up  daily & him  celebrating  her  accomplishments  she  believed  were  self  -  earned  .  in  october  ,  though  ,  she  received  a  phone  call  from  her  father’s  attorney  ,  mr.  berger  ,  who  informed  her  that  henrik  was  in  the  hospital  in  critical  condition  after  a  heart  attack  .  she  flew  to  stockholm  ,  where  her  father  had  been  taking  care  of  business  items  , & realized  that  it  was  time  to  say  her  goodbyes  .  her  father & her  played  chess  ,  talked  about  her  childhood  , & reconciled  on  any  old  issues  .  he  passed  away  three  days  after  she’d  arrived  .  seeming  as  if  he’d  been  able  to  tell  something  horrible  was  coming  ,  henrik  had  updated  his  will  a  matter  of  weeks  before  the  heart  attack  ,  naming  desiree  as  the  sole  inheritor  of  all  his  assets & belongings  .  except  ,  of  course  ,  her  mother  ,  who  inherited  a  whopping  five  dollars  from  her  husband  .  this  was  ,  mr  .  berger  explained  to  desi  ,  so  that  miriam  could  not  claim  that  she  had  accidentally  been  left  out  , & was  entitled  to  more  of  his  estate  .  

if  this  wasn’t  enough  ,  the  press  soon  released  that  interntional  business  mogul  henrik  lindbergh  had  passed  away  , & the  companies  he  owned  were  now  owned  by  a  twenty  one  year  old  model  who  had  never  truly  worked  one  day  in  her  life  .  to  make  matters  worse  ,  her  mother  quickly  played  the  victim  ,  launching  a  multitude  of  lawsuits  against  her  own  daughter  for  defamation & coercing  her  father  to  leave  her  mother  out  of  it  .  berger  quickly  chose  desirée’s  side  ,  though  he  couldn’t  become  her  personal  attorney  out  of  conflict  of  interest  with  the  executing  of  the  will  .  as  the  accounts  lie  in  limbo  during  the  legal  battle  ,  desi  is  relying  solely  on  the  secret  account  her  father  made  her  in  switzerland  ;  if  her  mother  knew  ,  she  would  try  to  go  after  it  ,  as  well  .  

2021 :  desirée  has  layed  low  over  the  last  few  months  ,  her  mother  continuing  her  public  display  of  heartache  as  the  widow  .  desi  can  be  said  to  be  two  -  faced  due  to  her  sweet  disposition  one  day & her  cold  attitude  the  next  .  in  reality  ,  she  is  normally  kind & thoughtful  ,  giving  the  benefit  of  the  doubt  to  those  two  wrong  her  ,  but  lately  she  has  become  more  withdrawn  ,  secretive  , & volatile  .  she  was  recently  photographed  in  a  restaurant  ,  crying  on  the  phone  with  her  head  in  her  hand  ,  something  she  would  never  normally  allow  to  happen  .  overall  ,  though  ,  she  doesn't  want  to  speak  publicly  about  the  legal  battle  because  she  considers  it  a  delicate  matter  &  wants  to  take  the  high  road  .  because  of  this  ,  she  puts  on  a  face  that  she's  happy  ,  has  done  her  mourning  ,  &  intentionally  does  things  to  make  it  seem  like  life  is  normal  ,  like  making  appearances  at  events  about  new  york  city  &  being  spotted  hanging  out  with  friends  .  only  a  very  small  handful  in  her  inner  circle  notice  the  immense  stress  she's  under  because  she's  good  at  managing  it  ,  &  doesn't  want  to  be  pitied  .

*  .  personality  .

personality  wise  ,  she  is  quite  bubbly  ,  thoughtful  ,  dependable  ,  observant  ,  calm  , &  chooses  her  words  carefully  .  on  the  other  hand  ,  she  can  be  very  hot  &  cold  ,  self - isolating  ,  two  -  faced  , & tells  blatant  lies  when  she  ought  not  to  ,  &  denies  vehemently  when  others  call  her  on  her  bs  .  she’s  the  type  to  remember  someone  saying  they  like  something  ,  in  passing  ,  then  suddenly  she  shows  up  with  that  exact  thing  when  she  sees  them  next  .  her  love  language  is  definitely  gifts  &  acts  of  service  .  considers  herself  a  good  advice  giver  but  won’t  take  any  advice  others  give  her  .  kind  of  an  air  head  ,  in  that  she  can  get  so  wrapped  up  in  her  own  world  that  she  forgets  that  others  aren’t  just  npc’s  in  her  life  sfjklsd  .  can  get  overwhelmed  easily  ,  &  retracts  back  into  herself  &  isolates  in  her  apartment  for  days  on  end  ,  pampering  herself  with  huge  shopping  sprees  ,  overpriced  face  masks  ,  &  too  much  champagne  .  her  way  to  deal  with  problems  is  to  pretend  they’re  not  there  until  eventually  they  go  away  🤡

the  world  knows  the  bulk  of  the  lindbergh  -  montenegro  affair  ,  as  its  known  in  the  media  ,  thanks  to  her  mother  taking  interviews  left  & right  to  allude  to  her  being  snubbed  by  her  own  daughter  .  desi  pretends  that  it  does  not  bother  her  ,  that  justice  will  be  served  & that  legality  will  prevail  over  her  mother’s  cries  ,  but  the  weight  of  the  affair  is  taking  a  toll  on  her  .  

*  .  wanted  plots  .  

click  here  for  sideblog  with  wanted  plots  !

best  friend / ride  or  die  :  someone  desi’s  been  friends  with  for  YEARS  ,  knows  all  her  family’s  bs  ,  prob  has  called  her  mother  a  b*tch  to  her  face  dflkjsdkl  .  literally  the  nicole  to  her  paris  ,  the  lorelai  to  her  rory  .  

squad  :  a  group  of  friends  who  go  clubbing  every  saturday  &  get  brunch  &  gossip  the  next  morning  ,  have  shady  nicknames  in  their  gc  ,  have  designated ‘ roles ’  in  the  friend  group  (  mom  friend  ,  the  cr*ckhead  ,  the  wingperson  ,  etc  .  ) ,  go  on  trips  together  ,  have  the  wildest  birthday  parties  ,  etc  .  please  !!  

first  love  :  this  would’ve  been  in  their  teens  ,  a  summer  fling  that  she  fell  hard  for  &  who  her  father  didn’t  approve  of  bc  he’s  business - minded  first  .  they  tried  to  do  long  distance  when  she  went  back  to  school  in  the  fall  ,  but  it  didn’t  work  out  &  now  they’re  either  on  good  terms  &  have  sweet  memories  of  that  time  ,  or  one  is  still  kinda  salty  how  things  ended  .

bad  influence  :  encourages  desi  to  get  the  stick  out  of  her  *ss  ,  &  when  she  hangs  out  with  them  ,  they  tend  to  go  overboard  on  whatever  the  entertainment  of  the  night  may  be  . 

friends  to  lovers / slow - burn  romance  :  they’re  friends  first  ,  but  there’s  been  undeniable  romantic  tension  between  the  two  of  them  (  imagine  pope  towards  kiara  in  obx  )  ,  &  their  friends  can pick  up  on  it  .  they’ve  never  acted  on  it  , worried  of  ruining  the  friendship  ,  but  they’re  always  a  lil  disappointed  when  the  other  goes  home  with  or  gets  involved  with  someone  else  ,  but  are  ultimately  there  to  pick  up  the  pieces  afterwards  .

enemies  /  mutual  dislike  :  maybe  someone  whose  family  her  father  screwed  in  business  ,  their  parents  could  have  been  friends  before  desi’s  mom  turned  on  them  somehow  ,  they  think  desi  thinks  she’s  queen  of  the  world  ,  etc . let’s  plan  it  out  hehe

cheating  :  oop  !  i  love  the  angst  ,  so  gimme  someone  who  either  a  )  cheated  on  desi  ,  or  b  )  they  think  she  cheated  on  them  due  to  some  tabloid  article  ,  rumor  around  town  she  was  seen  with  someone  ,  etc .  their  relationship  was  prob  rocky  as  fuck  ,  toxic  ,  &  lacked  trust  &  communication  .  just  a  total  shit  show  tbh  .

that’s  all  i  can  think  of  now  dskljfkl  please  feel  free  to  reach  out  over  tumblr  msgs  or  on  discord  !  

[radramblog]

Rating the letters of the alphabet

I feel like part of my style of comedy is just rambling about shit and making loose connections between things as part of an overall bit. I think. I’m no expert on myself, unfortunately.

The inspiration for the following absolute load of shite is trying to search Tiermaker for nothing. Like, no characters in the search bar. Didn’t come up with anything. Did a search for just a space. No dice. What about just a? Surely that’ll bring up everything with an A in the title. But it didn’t, and I was somewhat disappointed.

Then my head started writing bits about letters and that’s how we got here. This is probably really stupid, but maybe it’ll at least be fun. Wordplay is cool, though maybe not my strong suit? Anyway.

A: A is one of the two letters that’s also just a word, as you’ve just seen, giving it a necessary promotion in rank. Not a lot of things get to double up like that, though with the “an” ligature maybe it’s actually a double or nothing. But because of the confusing common connection crossing contexts for the character, it gets somewhat awkward to talk about the letter in conversation. An A, in my opinion, A does not get. 4/5.

B: B is also just a word letter but unlike A when you write it out you have to stick a few extra letters on to make it work, making it not as good. But B’s association with bees isn’t enough, because in the year of our lord, like, 2019 or something, it would become inextrixably linked with shite memes as the B emoji became king. And I just don’t respect that. It’s otherwise a fine letter, dragged down by its company. 2/5.

C: Oh come on now, the word doesn’t even have a C in it anymore! You can sea the see without any of our tertiary letter’s involvement whatsoever. Not to mention how its two main sounds are just copies from other letters wholesale. C must be confusing to non-english speakers, I’d imagine. C as a grade gets what C as a grade typically entails for many a schoolchild. 3/5.

D: It would be remiss of me not to give a sterling grade to the D. Why, none of us would be here without it. While many a youth may find the D to be quite a humourous subject, I assure you I’m taking it with the gravest of sincerity when I say the D has got to be one of the best letters of all.

And by D I mean deity, of course. Wait, what did you think I meant? 5/5.

E: The absolute absurdity that is the E meme elevates E efficiently enough to excel beyond many another vowel. However, it is also the single most common letter in the English language, going so far as to open the damn name. It’s to the point where someone made a point of writing an entire book without using it, and I think Gadsby is cool but mayhaps avoiding fifth uncial was a bit showy. I can’t help but mark it down for the sake of hipster cred. 3/5.

F: F is for Fuck. I like the word Fuck. F is for paying respects. I think the military-industrial complex has poisoned our cultural landscape to the point that a reference to one of its most prized productions’ awkward moments has become one of the most colloquially used meme letters in existence, And That’s Terrible. 3/5, I’m conflicted.

G: Man literally who the fuck cares about G. What is it even good for. Just an absolute waste of a letter, total shithouse. It’s NATO equivalent is Golf, the Worst Sport, too. Who asked for any of this? Just use a J instead, it’s cooler. 1/5.

H: I’ve seen “Hhh” used enough times in written forms of pornography to not consider it a Horny Letter. That and it, being short for Hentai, is often used to denote adult material in Japan. Basically what im saying is, I think this gets worse the less sex-positive you are. 6/9.

I: I think I’ve said enough about letter words already, but I is another high-tier one because like A I is just it’s own thing. It can also, however, be a bit confusing, looking just like an l a lot of the time, and having to constantly capitalise it is a pain in the ass. I also don’t have a particularly high opinion of myself, so a high opinion of I seems disingenuous. 3/5.

J: Clearly the best letter, hands down. I’m definitely not biased. There are so few letters as underappreciated by J- a fact many a person who’s had to do that “assign yourself an alliterative adjective” icebreaker game has had to reckon with. Because it appears to be a lot more popular with names than with words, and that just kind of sucks. 6/5.

K: K has in some circles managed to bump off its partner to become yet another letter word, though in a very informal abbreviated sense. However, when you’re looking into scientific fields, eventually said partner returns, having lost some weight on the trip down to absolute zero. This all makes complete sense in my head, and I’m sure is a lot less funny to anyone who doesn’t live there. 4/5.

L: I’d argue that L doesn’t cop its namesake. It’s a really useful letter, loads of words use it, especially in pairs, and my ADHD-brain thought it was fun to just say LLLLLLLLLLL for a bit while I was thinking about this so I guess that’s staying in now. Put me down as an L Lobbyist. 4/5.

M: Mmmmmm. M&Ms. But also it’s kind of a pain to write. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. 3/5.

N: I’d like to fight whoever decided we should have two letters that sound so similar right bloody next to each other in the alphabet. Actually, who the fuck even decided the alphabet’s order to begin with? Maybe it should go M to N, that’ll bloody show you. 2/5.

O: Our fourth vowel, and perhaps one of the underappreciated ones. O is similarly a letter word, but a much more common one considering its use as an interjection. It’s also one half of a very powerful letter combo, as we’ll see. 4/5.

P: There’s the other half. Many a joke involves OP as a phrase, whether it mean overpowered or original poster, and the letters’ adjacency is a lovely bit of serendipity. Whenever I say P out loud, on its own, I have to resist the urge to do some incredibly shitty beatboxing, which may or may not be a good sign. 4/5.

Q: I was going to write some very harsh words about Q, and its dependency on U, but then I realised that that is probably hate speech against the disabled. It still sucks, though. 0/5.

R: R is the one I am most struggling to think of things to say about. R is another letter that’s just kinda there. I’m sure the Roberts and Rachels of the world would disagree with me, though. It’s also the name of a program that I know has traumatised a lot of young biologist wannabes, slapping us with a whole pile of maths and statistics when we just wanted to look at cool plants and shit. Or in my case, cool cells and shit. 2/5.

S: The most overrated consonant, but also the thing that makes plurals not a pain in the ass. However I’m going to lean towards giving S a positive rating, if only because it’s associated with snakesssss (and serpentine characters who can talk) and I like those. 3/5.

T: I don’t think T gets enough credit as one of the pillars of the English language. A lot of very common words feature it, and yet it feels like it never gets the same level of credit as big shots like S or half of the vowels. T is like the character actor of the alphabet, is basically what I’m saying. 4/5.

U: Ah, the letter Americans hate for some reason. I think this is actually commentary on the history of American politics. Because throughout history, America has been extremely selfish and self-centered, while attempting to present a positive image that people are finally seeing past. They only entered WWI and WWII when it was convenient for them, they started wars and initiated coups in even their allies for petty ideological reasons, and they’ve gone to war with several countries and funded wars with several others seeming just for shits and giggles. Because apparently if you’re not an American, then you’re not one of them, and that means they hate U. 4/5.

V: I actually think V is underrated. It’s a fun sound. That’s it, no joke here. It’s neat, I like it. 4/5.

W: This may come as a shock to you, but double-u over here is actually two Vs! unless you’re writing in cursive, but fuck cursive. The French actually have it right on this one, naming it double-v (pronounced doobleh-vay). Add in the fact that it’s literally just M upside down, and you’ve got a pretty shite letter. 1/5.

X: There’s a reason literally every “A is for Apple” thing you see made for kids uses Xylophone for X, and that’s because there are no commonly used words that start with it. Seriously, it’s all just scientific terms- I’d argue X-Ray is more common than Xylophone in common parlance, but also, who wants to explain imaging to a kid. It doesn’t even get a second page of words on Dictionary.com. X also has implications as a letter word, that I’d rather avoid at the moment. 2/5.

Y: Ah, Ygreck, everyone’s favourite “what the fuck, France?” moment. Between that and being sorta kinda not really a vowel, Y prompts its own question more often than I’d care to admit. 2/5.

Z: As a (technical) member of the generation associated with this letter- on the one hand, I’m sorry, on the other, y’all have it coming. The final letter of the alphabet, one of the other ones worth 10 in scrabble (and yet X isn’t???), and one we probably got pretty sick of in the early 00s when it was everywhere- ironically, when most of the generation was getting born. 2/5.

And that’s the lot of them. I hope this didn’t alienate any non-English speakers too hard. It’s probably fine.

Join me for more bullshit next time I have another stupid idea. I mean, tomorrow.

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

hey! thank you for everything that you do! you are awesome. im just wondering if you any fic were Stiles is fae? thank you!

We sure do. - Anastasia

till the moon has taken flight (to the waters and the wild) by WindyRein

(5/10 I 1,426 I Not Rated I Steter)

It's not fair! But he knows already that life isn't fair, doesn't he? He can feel the bitter smile curling his lips.He, if there is such a thing anymore, floats and is torn apart and doesn't exist. (but that would be kind, wouldn't it?)

Bloody Secrets by cywscross

(1/1 I 3,085 I Teen I Steter)

Stiles has silver in his veins.

Peter could’ve done without finding out this way though.

Somewhere to Start by Lissadiane

(1/1 I 3,352 I Teen I Sterek)

Stiles has always known that he isn't quite human - the plant life that tends to sprout around him whenever he gets upset or excited gives it away. He's never really fit in among the regular people in Beacon Hills and is determined to wait it out, go to college, and find somewhere to belong. He's forced to abandon those plans, however, after he desperately agrees to enter into an arranged marriage to save his father's life.

An arranged marriage with an angry, sometimes furry dude with trust issues. It's all very Beauty and the Beast, without the singing candlesticks.

Dance Under the Moonlight by Therapeutic_Steter

(2/2 I 3,440 I Mature I Steter)

Fae!Stiles saving Peter from Pack's stupidity and washing his hands of them. Please?

The Other Side by Green

(1/1 I 3,769 I Explicit I Steter)

Stiles doesn't know anything about his father, only what his mother told him, that he's human. Despite her words, Stiles has had his doubts. So when the queen sends him through the veil, he's nervous and isn't sure what to think.

Seven Years Falling by InfiniteAlexisA

(1/1 I 3,880 I Not Rated I Sterek)

“I don’t mean to!” Derek yelled throwing his hands in the air.“DON’T YELL AT ME!” Stiles screeched, his entire body going up in flames.This is what Derek gets for dating a fire elemental.

we're not so different (you and i) by colferstilinski

(1/1 I 5,621 I Explicit I Sterek)

For many of the fairies that lives here, Utopia is their sanctuary—haven, in other words—and why shouldn't it be? It never rains on this stretch of meadow, the clouds in the skies always pink with interest and it smells like the breaking of spring every dawn and dusk.

Stiles detest it, the least to say.

It’s too much and he hates swinging along with the status quo with the other fairies. Yeah, with their blooming shades of colours and the shimmering, silken tunics they don on and fuck, the limitless sparkles. There’s even a new trend going on with the younger generation where they gather allium blooms to form a flower crown, oh—with added glitter!—and it makes Stiles wants to roll his eyes.

-

Or the fic in which Stiles is a fairy and wants to escape the horrendous, boring world of fairyland to have an adventure. And by adventure, he means meeting Derek. The plant. Or... not-so plant.

Cold Iron by the_problem_with_stardust

(5/5 I 5,641 I Teen I Sterek)

Derek thought the disaster that ended with Kate Argent almost burning down his family home was a relationship worst-case scenario. So, when Dr. Deaton reveals that his current girlfriend is not what she seems, Derek is ready to swear off romance forever. In an attempt to escape his well-meaning (but insanely overbearing) family, Derek volunteers to take over remodeling the small cottage that was left to the Hale siblings in his grandmother’s will. Connemara is nothing like California, and Derek feels like his luck just might be looking up.

salt and a waltz by The Byger (Byacolate)

(1/1 I 7,433 I Explicit i Sterek)

"Not that lubed-up Q-tips aren’t the sexiest thing in the world, but I kinda want to know what it’s like, you know. To be impaled on your huge dick without actually being impaled.”

“It was about to get sexy there, but you shot the mood right in the face.”

In which Stiles is a faerie and Derek is sick and tired of not being able to fuck him.

Don't You Wanna Be My Sky? by WhoNatural

(1/1 I 9,420 I General I Sterek)

Stiles got ratted out by the Realm Guard for sneaking off with Scott a total of seven times before his dad buckled, promising sabbatical once Stiles reached Faehood, and enough Earth culture in the meantime to have him talking like a born-and-bred Californian teenager.

He just didn’t have the tan.

(Or, in which Stiles is a Frost Fae sent to the Earth Realm on the Fae version of Rumspringa and immediately falls head-first into a Coffee Shop AU)

No Love in Idleness by Elpie (Horribibble)

(2/2 I 11,687 I Explicit I Sterek)

Stiles is the sole grandchild of none other than Robin Goodfellow, the most mischievous faerie ever to wreak havoc among the Folk and Man alike. To the people of Beacon Court, he is at best a merry wanderer of the night.

At first, Ser Derek is inclined to agree, but the little bird on his shoulder has quite a bit to say about that.

Trees are always a relief after dealing with people (except when they aren't) by ravelqueen

(1/1 I 15,889 I Mature I Sterek)

Derek Hale decides to become a hermit before he reaches 25. Too bad he picked Beacon Hills as his retirement home.

(Or the one where Stiles is a wood nymph/pixie/human hybrid who falls in love with his new grumpy werewolf neighbour)

Broken People Get Recycled by poemwithnorhyme

(1/1 I 16,389 I General i Sterek)

Nothing is ever just calm in Beacon Hills. No, something always has to go wrong, and this time, it's Stiles' turn in the spotlight. That doesn't mean he has to like it. Post S2 AUFae!Stiles

The Magic's in the Coffee by xxxillusionxxx

(8/8 I 17,596 I Explicit I Sterek)

Ever since the tall, muscled, leather-clad werewolf had begun his daily coffee routine at the Skullery—a horrendous name in Stiles’s opinion, but his boss was a skeleton who thought he was terribly clever—an impromptu competition developed among the baristas.

When Trust is Everything by hellbells

(12/12 I 27,913 I Teen i Sterek)

For a secret to remain true then only one person can know it; if not then it will come out. Beacon Hills is the converging point of several secrets all wrapped up in the supernatural. For Stiles, the unravelling of several will let him find peace, love and safety in the arms of his true mate. The only question is can he trust a Sourwolf and his pack well enough to show his true self.

It just might be the one thing between Beacon Hills and safety!

(Or observe the really awkward distrustful courtship between a Sourwolf and a hidden Fae Mage)

A Little Bit of Sunshine by 100KlicksAway

(21/? I 29,600 I Mature I Sterek)

Stiles woke with a start, dreams of pixies flitting around his head. He’d dreamed… He’d dreamed that he was a wolf? Or…. He wasn’t sure. Something with fangs… His mouth had been dripping blood in his dream, and when he woke, he could still taste the thick copper taste coating his mouth.

Stiles has been working hard for the pack since Scott was bitten. They leave him out more and more frequently, though, until Stiles realizes that he's strictly unnecessary. Then, the pack's activities throw him into danger and he ends up in a shitty situation with no one helping him.

Stiles leaves Beacon Hills. He doesn't care anymore, he just... Needs out.

The Last Chills of Winter by LeeHan

(1/1 I 42,525 I Explicit I Sterek)

“He didn’t magically charm me,” Derek shot back in his defense.“Oh, so he just regular charmed you?” Laura said with a smirk.“What? No,” Derek growled.“Was he hot?”“No! He just—“ He just had a laugh like a sun shower. Fuck.

We Follow Darkness Like a Dream by GreenasCole

(10/10 I 51,106 I Mature I Sterek)

When a mysterious note is left on the Stilinski's door it leads Stiles and his best friend Scott out into the woods on quest for answers about Beacon Hills's most infamous tragedy. After a surprise encounter with a monstrous wolf the two boys are hurled into an ancient and terrifying world, only for Stiles to discover he was secretly a part of it all along. Will he manage to survive the insanity of Fae politics and avoid the enemies that are suddenly crawling out of the woodwork to find a place in this new world? Or will the very revelation of his existence be the catalyst that plunges both worlds into war and chaos? And why can't Scott just stop teasing him every time he catches Stiles looking at their new "friend" Derek too long?

Laughter in the Dark by Starshaker

(13/? I 56,148 I Mature I Sterek)

Stiles is a fae. A trickster spirit with too much curiosity for his own good and a knack for getting into trouble. When he's just trying to help things don't go to plan and coincidences don't seem to end up for the better.Trapped, isolated and aching to get home, though it's better than what Gerard would have had planned for him initially, Stiles learns to deal with his new set of circumstances.

The Fairy's Wolf by kuki

(57/? I 90,602 I Explicit I Sciles)

In a world where non-humans mingle with humans in public schools until they became of age, about high school age, going instead to a specialty finishing school, a young halfling fae fights to stay with his friends. His fear of losing touch with his best friend, a young Alpha werewolf, has the pair pushing their relationship to the edge; and their relationship has the world on the brink of war.

-or-where I apparently ship Skittles hard now, hate myself with this work load on top of my school work, switch up species because f-u that's why, make up mythology, and try to give Derek a nice life.

Where You Still Remember Dreaming by yodasyoyo

(15/15 I 95,612 I Explicit I Sterek)

“What’s your name? I can’t keep calling you Balto.”

“What’s yours?”

“Stiles.”

Derek raises an eyebrow. That isn’t his real name. There’s no way. But now he thinks about it, he has a vague memory of someone, probably Uncle Peter, telling him that with the fae, names have power. “I’m Miguel,” he says.

“Lie.”

“Are you trying to tell me your real name is Stiles?”

Stiles runs his tongue across his teeth and considers Derek carefully. “Fair enough,” he says, “Miguel it is.”

Grabbing his groceries and pocketing the change, Derek turns to leave; he’s nearly at the door when Stiles calls out, “By the way, Miguel, if you’re interested, it’s two for one on bags of kibble at the pet store down the street.”

Derek doesn’t look back, doesn’t hesitate, just raises a hand and flips him off on the way out.

[progressivestupidity]

IZ week 2020

so i wasn’t gonna do this because I didn’t think the prompts were very good for writing to, but I remembered the last day’s prompt was “role swap” so I decided to do something small and quick for it. this is all 7 days in one post. the first and last ones are drabbles and one of them is an au idea

@invader-zim-week​ here u go!!!

Day 1. Angst or Fluff 

Zim’s denial skills are god tier, but even they have their limits.

Drabble. I think this is the turning point for my eventual found family au

“When are you going to get it through your thick head that the Tallests aren’t coming?” Dib flings his arms out wide in his exasperation

“They’re just…!” Zim fumbles a bit, clenching and unclenching his fists. “The Armada is a million light years away! It takes time to travel that far, obviously. It took me six of your months to get here from Conventia and the Massive is further away from here now than that. They’ll come! You’ll see! And then you’ll be sorry!” Zim’s face is drawn tight. He’s tense all over, shoulders drawn up to his jaw, antennae pressed flat to his head, and normally Dib prides himself on reading Zim like an open book, but he’s too far gone in his own annoyance to see the warning signs.

It’s because he doesn’t see these red flags that Dib proceeds to stick his own foot in his mouth with his next words. “Maybe if you weren’t such an idiot and opened your eyes, you’d see the truth—that they dumped you here to get rid of you.”

“YOU THINK I DON’T KNOW THAT?” Zim explodes, planting his tiny hands in Dib’s chest and shoving. The boy lands painfully on his ass. “I’m not stupid, Dib.” His name is spat like an insult. “I know they don’t care about me! Why do you think I try so hard?”

Dib gapes at Zim, looking up at him for once, stunned into silence. “I.” He swallows. “You know?”

“Of course, I know.” Zim’s voice is a low hiss and his eyes are narrowed to slits. “You don’t get banished and then just get over it. You don’t get put on trial to defend your life, forced to relive your worse mistakes, and get sentenced to death, only to be saved by freak miracle, and never acknowledge it happened.” Zim takes a deep breath and crosses his arms over his chest. Dib supposes he means for it to look intimidating, but it looks more like he’s holding himself together. “I’ve always known.”

“Why do you try so hard then? If you’ve always known there was no point?” Dib has to ask, has to know, has to hear the words from Zim’s own mouth.

Zim purses his lips and turns away. “There was always a point.” He falls silent for a moment, one antenna twitching up a bit in thought. “I just… I thought if I was just a little better, if I accomplished something important for once, that… I don’t know, that maybe I’d.” He pauses and grits his teeth. “Maybe if I actually managed to take over this filthy planet I’d be worth something for once.”

Day 2. Be Gay Do Crime (LGBTQA+ headcannons)

Dib is bi/pan/demi-ro, Gaz is lesbian, Zim is ace/demi-ro

Headcanons.

Dib seems like the kind of guy that would both take whatever kind of relationship he could get, but also appreciate it. Dib isn’t afraid to work for what he wants and isn’t afraid of things that are “not normal” so I see him being the type to not care about the gender of whoever he eventually decides to date. However, because Dib’s been burned in the past, he would need a deep and sincere emotional relationship to see someone as a potential romantic partner.

Gaz is just a big lesbian. Girls, man.

Zim is ace all the way baby!!! He’s just not interested, and sure, part of that is me projecting, but it just feels right for Zim to just… not care. He has no interest and doesn’t care for sexual attraction regardless of whether or not Irkens do/can/will have sex or not. On the other hand, Zim has expressed a softer side before and I can see him being able to maybe eventually develop romantic feelings for someone if he actually manages to get close enough to them for those kinds of feelings to even emerge. It would take a lot of time and a deep, meaningful friendship, but Zim has shown he’s capable of love. He just has to let himself feel it.

  Day 3. Fandom Appreciation

Found family fuck yeah

Headcanons.

I’m still in the process of thinking about how I wanna go about my found family au so here’s just some initial ideas

After ETF, Zim self isolates for a bit. The florpus hole was his Last Ditch Effort plan and had it succeeded, he knew he would have been destroyed too. He was okay with it. He had made peace with it. However, it failed, and now he’s forced to reflect on said failure

The Massive doesn’t escape the florpus. They’re gone, completely. If they the ship does manage to get out, it’s not in one piece

I initially couldn’t decide if The Trial should come Before ETF or After but I think im gonna say before so the Massive doesn’t have to come back lmao

Before too long, Zim jumps back into the planning/scheming swing of things, but his ideas are never more than petty crimes and being a huge annoyance

Dib gets really annoyed with him and they have a big argument

Zim finally admits to knowing of his own Defectiveness

Dib reluctantly feels bad for him and backs off a bit to let Zim have his space

Zim, however, sees this as a betrayal and redoubles his efforts to get his attention

Somewhere along the way, Skoodge comes back and Zim backs off of Dib a bit, having someone else to focus attention on

Dib eventually begins to offer Zim his hand in friendship (phrased as a truce at first) and they finally make steps towards getting along

They realize they actually really like being friends

Zim eventually realizes that he’s made a life for himself, outside of the Empire

Eventually Zim, Skoodge, GIR, Minimoose, Dib, and Gaz form their own little family and explore space and hunt cryptids

(I love cryptid hunter and space exploration aus holy shit)

Day 4. If IZ had a different setting/time period

Cyberpunk??? Sure

Potential idea maybe.

Cyberpunk dystopian future

Aliens and humans intermingle, both on and off Earth

The Irken Empire has gotten bigger

Technology is advanced and cybernetics are widely known/produced

Idk man I don’t know a lot about cyberpunk, maybe this should be more for the aesthetic

Day 5. Aesthetic

Big shrug man idk

Headcanons, thoughts.

I’m a big fan of fashion Zim, and whenever I get the chance I give him clothes that are both cute and comfortable

Galaxy print leggings are a personal favorite of mine to give him

One time I wrote a little ficlet/oneshot where he wore a skirt. I should publish that some day

Uhhhhhh okay so. Dib has veeeeeery big early 2000s emo/punk vibes tbh

Scene kid GIR always makes me laugh

Gaz could pull off pastel goth like no one’s business

I’ve been here long enough to witness emo/scene hair wig Zim and his eventual fall lmfao

Pretty much everyone that redesigned them back in the day gave Zim emo kid hair that fall perfectly over one eye it was WILD

 Day 6. What if IZ was a different Genre?

Uhhhh does “fantasy instead of scifi” count?

Potential idea maybe. (oops it ended up being a fantasy/modern magic au haha ooooops)

Instead of being an alien, I had the idea of, maybeeeeee Irkens are like. Elves maybe, or perhaps some kind of fae. (I don’t know much about fae, oops)

Okay bear with me here, this is all coming together in real time.

The Irkens (which is what I’m gonna call their clan or faction or subrace or whatever) still want to be the rulers or something over the humans/other mystical beings. This world of magic is hidden from humans and they live blissfully unaware. There are invaders all over the place, using magic and glamors to trick humans into thinking they’re also humans. Zim is one such invader and just to happens to end up in Dib’s town, whereupon he enrolls in Dib’s school, pretending to be a transfer student.

I have no idea why or how the Irkens invade or what methods they use, but since my biggest experience with elves is through DND, I’m going to say they’re functionally similar to certain DND elf races.

So anyway, Zim ends up in Dib’s class and Zim’s glamor just Doesn’t Work on Dib for whatever reason (maybe Dib passed his Wisdom saving throw while literally everyone else failed, idk) and so Dib can immediately see Zim for what he is.

Dib is still into paranormal type stuff, though in his world, he’s less about cryptids and aliens and more about the magical species/world(s) that he KNOWS exists. His big goal in his au is similar to canon in that he wants to expose it all for recognition and love from his father.

Zim, meanwhile, he just wants to prove himself, just like canon. I can’t decide how I want the Irken hierarchy to go in this au—that’s something to think about later, when I have more time—but whatever it is, Zim is either a) not very good at it, b) not suited for it, c) ridiculed for not fitting in to it, or d) a combination of any or all of these things. (or secret option e) he rejects it but has no where else to go. On the other hand, it maybe be none of these things.)

GIR is here too though he’s probably not a robot. Maybe he’s another kind of magical being, or, hell, maybe he’s just Zim’s little brother. I’d be okay with that.

Gaz can also see through glamors but she just doesn’t care. Tak shows up at some point to get revenge, and Skoodge also shows up at some point to stay with Zim and be his friend.

Zim is bad at blending in at first, but he eventually Does get better, since he’s not totally isolated from other Irkens here and he also doesn’t Look like an alien.

(I’m thinkin’ elves in this au look Mostly human but with a few differences. Since I’m biased and this is MY fantasy world, damnit, elves are just. Really Pretty. Ethereal and elegant and graceful (for the most part—there are always exceptions) and they’re also great at magic. Maybe Zim isn’t all that great at magic, I dunno. I’ll figure something out.)

This ended up being less of a genre change and more of a whole ass au, lol oops

Day 7. Role swap

Chanting: human zim au human zim au human zim au human zi

Drabble. This is for an ongoing species swap au that i’ve had in development for the last few years. i haven’t posted anything for it yet, but I’ve thought about it a lot

Dib freezes as Zim points the plastic water gun at his head. Zim’s eyes are narrowed, lips pursed, and he adjusts his grip almost nervously. Behind him, Gir is holding a bucket full of water balloons and a pair of neon green star shaped sunglasses. It’d be cute if Dib wasn’t aware of how painful Earth water is to his Irken skin.

Zim finally lowers his gun slightly. “I want some answers, alien.” He looks Dib over with critical eyes. “Who are you really, and why are you here?” He reaches back and Gir hands him a water balloon with a big smile. “And you better tell the truth or I’ll bust this over your big head.”

Dib grimaces and watches the balloon. “My name Dib, and I’m a scientist. I’m an Irken, from Irk, and I’m here to learn more about life on this planet.” He holds his hands up, hoping to placate the human gesture for surrender. “I’m not here to harm you or anyone else, promise.”

Zim huffs. “Yeah right. I bet you just came here to laugh at the locals.” He puts on a mocking voice and waves the gun and balloon as he speaks. “‘Stupid, stinking humans. They can’t even travel beyond their own moon, yet. What morons. I bet they descended from pigs with how horrible and stupid they are.’” He jams the gun against Dib’s chest. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

Dib bites his lower lip and looks away. He can’t deny he hasn’t thought something similar since arriving on Earth, but Zim didn’t have to be so crude and blunt about it.

The two are at a standoff for almost a minute before Zim blows out a long sigh and steps back. He turns to put the balloon back in the bucket, gives Gir a pat on the head, and shoots Dib one last glare. “Stay away from me, Dib. I have enough problems to deal with without having to worry about whether or not it’s safe for my brother to go to school or if I need to watch my back while walking my dog.”

“I wouldn’t hurt you,” Dib says, a little put out.

Zim scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before. I know better than to believe it.” He turns and tries to smile at Gir but it comes out a little twisted and sad. “C’mon Gir. Let’s go home and get Minimoose and take him to that dog park you like so much.”

Gir gasps and lets out a cheer. “Can we go get ice cream afterwards?”

Zim gives a little laugh, smile turning a bit more genuine. “Yeah, sounds good.”

As they walk away Dib can’t help but wonder why he ever thought Zim was an Irken himself.

[firebunnylover]

Hannah Watches LoSH - The Substitutes

So, this episode admittedly took longer than anticipated. Classes were a lot harder than anticipated this semester, and i’m trying to make money for next semester so I’m trying to get as many hours at work as possible.

With life’s problems aside for now, let’s resume looking at Legion of Superheroes!

The Substitutes

Kicking this episode off, we see that the Legion Auditions are finally underway. Hooray! And boy is there a line.

Yeesh. It's like an anime convention on opening day.

Going inside, we see that the current judges present are Superman, Saturn Girl, Bouncing Boy, Lightning Lad, and Brainiac 5. There are spots for others, but they aren't there.

Hmm. BOth PG and TW aren't here...

The first kid up is Chlorophyll Kid, and Superman asks him to demonstrate his powers, which is promoting plant growth. However, the plant that does grow is not friendly.

Okay, we KNOW Lightning Lad has been dreading this day for a while now.

But... can we just appreciate the off character model image of him?

PFFT HE HAS ANIMU EYES

After Saturn Girl asks Chlorophyll Kid if he can do anything to stop it and he asks if making it bigger will help, to which the Legion say no, Bouncy uses himself as live bait.

THESE PEOPLE APPRECIATE BOUNCY THE WAY HUNK SHOULD BE.

After Bouncy succeeds in bursting out of the plant to take it down, Brainy walks Chlorophyll Kid out. Who is still optimistic about his chances. Aww.

Up next is Stone Boy – NO NOT THE DRUG STONNED! THE ROCK STONE! He just turns into a stone figure of whatever his current pose is.

Gotta love these dorks.

The funniest part is that Stone Kid is set to the side for most of the remaining auditon, with Color Kid up next.  

Also, not overlooking that triangle rainbow on his uniform.

Very subtle.

And then we get our next contestant.

RUDE.

LIGHTNING LAD, THAT BOY LOVES YOU. GO DOWN THERE AND APOLOGIZE!

Aww, watch the Trash Baby tremble in fear.

What a good person Bouncy is.

However, the demonstration he did is not much better than during our initial introduction to him. Good thing everyone without invulnerability was hiding behind Bouncy. He deserves all the awards.

Following up after Pete is Kem, who now refers to himself as Matter Eater Lad. His demonstration involves eating a bomb, but I want to appreciate the bro-ness between him and Lightning Lad

Bros.

And then after Matter-Eater Lad’s demonstration, we get to see this show’s version of Star Boy.

My skin has been cleared. The next best thing before we get Black Panther next year.

Trash Baby and Karma go hand in hand.

We then see Infectious Lass, who I personally think has one of the coolest designs. Interestingly, she is seen with an inhaler. For her demonstration I think she makes Bouncy catch some kind of flu or something. Not sure.

Fast forward to later at the end of the audition, with the announcement that the new Legionairres are Matter Eater Lad and Star Boy.

So. Rude.

After most of the applicants had dispersed, we are left with Pete, Infectious Lass, Chlorophyll Kid, Color Kid and Stone Boy – still stoned (don't take that out of context). They are all understandably dissapointed they didn't make it in.

However, Bouncing Boy approaches them and tells them that he also failed his first audition – and then via Pete reading off the official collector's edition of the Legion Log – not joking – it took him four tries. Four.

Wow, no wonder he tries helping the applicants to the auditions.

He encourages the rejectees to keep trying, giving them a good speech on being a hero. However, he has to leave with the Legion when trouble is reported.

Touched by Bouncy's speech, the rejects decide to do the Hero-ing to show what they are made of. AWW.

Back with the actual Legion, we see some weird creatures are eating the ionosphere.  

Wait, those monsters are republicans basically.

We finally see Star Boy and Matter Eater Lad in action, the latter who eats one of the monsters... oh boy.

Back at New Metropolis, Pete has taken the Leader position (imitating Lighting Lad-senpai), although his mom has to drive the squad to places (im gonna guess that they don't have their full drivers license yet).

However, most of their efforts don't work out too well.

But then we get one of the best villains on this show.

Star Finger.

THIS GUY. IS SO FRIGGIN EXTRA.

With him showing off his gloves' powers, we see that one finger releases what I will dub Star minion. I know in the show they are called Furries. But that word does not give me positive feelings in the context sense, since the word has a... sexual association to me. So I refuse to call them that here.

Hmm...

The reject squad (I'm sorry im not sure what to call them at this point because they haven't coined the term Substitutes yet even though I know they're called that in the comics), arrive and tell Star Finger he's going to jail.

Oh good, I don't have to feel too bad about calling them Reject Squad for now.

Star Finger manages to give them a good whooping though, and gets away.

Fancy.

But they group finds the minions going in the same direction.

We then return back to the Legion who are still fighting the monsters eating the ionosphere, with PG and TW back with the group. Brainy is unable to figure out where the monsters are coming from, but it's clear they keep coming.

Back on Earth.

HOW COULD YOU JUST LET HIM FLOAT AWAY STAR FINGER.

But that aside, the Reject Squad has managed to track Star Finger, and call up Brainy. But our grouchy robot dismisses them and Star Finger.

Brainy hangs up on them, and Pete confesses on being stuck on what to do next.  But despite that, he and the rest go to confront Star Finger again.

Okay I have questions on how that works.

Nice.

Star Finger gets annoyed that they are back, and ask who they are again, and if he owes them money.

Very accurate.

Their fight with Star Fingers goes much better this time. They still mess up in several ways, but manage to jump back up and use their powers in an effective manner. But Star Finger shoots the star minons at Stone Boy, making him float away.

The scene then cuts back to the Legion, and we get a good scene with Lightning Lad and Superman.

Seeing that the monsters' numbers have increased, Superman calls Brainy to see if there any solutions yet.

And he did!

Oh.

So his solution is a cannon that will polarize the ionosphere to make it inhospitable for anything, but there is a chance that it can incinerate the rest of the atmosphere over the western hemisphere.

Oh boy.

Superman tells him to keep thinking but Brainy states that there's less than an hour less, and given no clear origin, not many options are available.

We then see Stone Boy arrive in space with the Star Minions, and then this happens.

OH BOY.

The commercial cut then happens, and when returning, we finally see some more Legionnaires. HOORAY!

PFFT.

But as soon as the transformed Star Minions let go of him, Stone Boy turns into stone and descends back to earth.

But Brainy exits the ship with the cannon, which is charging. Superman insists there has to be another way, but Brainy says he doesn't have any other options.

Mm.

Returning to the Reject Squad, Star Finger once again has the upper hand on all except Chlorophyll Kid. WHo then proceeds to grow the same plant from the Audition. Which first attacks Star Finger, then turns to the squad.

And then Star Finger incinerates it, saying they should feel honored as he prepares to kill them. Thankfully Stone Boy crashes into the guy just in time, which leaves Star Finger unable to do anything else.

I'm gonna guess Stone Boy is the silent guy.

But he tells the group that the Star Minions are what eating the atmosphere. Unable to reach either the Legion or the SP though, the Squad try removing Star Finger's hand, but it refuses to go.  And when Pete demands to know how to get the glove off, we get one of hte best moments.

Wow.

Just as the cannon Brainy made is at full power, the Squad manages to arrive in Pete's mom's car with Star Finger tied to the hood.

Pfft.

Infectious Lass tells the Legion that it's Star Finger's glove that made the monsters. Brainy is still playing the role of the doubter.

What a grouch.

He removed it with grumpiness.

MY GIRL IS HARDCORE.

Brainy then says it seems the Squad is correct, but when they say they managed to save the world, he says not yet.

What a grump.

The scene cuts back to earth, where the Legion is thanking the Squad, with Brainy admitting they underestimated Star Finger. To which Star Finger says "Of course you did!" As the SP drag him away.

And then Lightning Lad admits they underestimated the rejects as well. And that he hopes to see them at the next audition.

The Squad state that although they are not as power as the individual members, they still make a good team, and they can fill in for the Legion once in a while, which  Bouncing Boy then coins the term "Legion of Substitute Heroes". Which the group likes.Superman replies to by saying they would be honored to work with them again.

What a dork.

So final thoughts on the episode overall and the characters

Okay, so this is both a lighter toned episode and one of the best written ones, and it doesn't even focus on the main cast of the series. I really enjoyed the episode. I also like they don't use the word Substitutes early on.

My only nitpick is the difference between this episode and the audition issue of the show's comic, which focused more on Infectious Lass rather than a group of the rejects, who is very different between the two versions.

We get a better look at the different types of people in this universe, seeing that not all people have boast-worthy powers, but they can still be effective if used in a particular manner. And even if the power is a good concept, execution and limits of that power can impact how effective it is.

I can understand both the reasoning on not picking just anyone in the auditions. Being in the Legion is hazardous. But I can also understand the disappointment of those rejected.

Now, onto the characters.

The only official Legion characters who got developed in a way were Lightning Lad, Bouncing Boy, and Brainiac 5.

Lightning Lad HATES the auditions. And we can't overlook the muttering under his breath when the audition was over. And clearly he wasn't a fan of the rejects – especially Pete. And that reaction when he sees him the first time since the initial meeting?

Not okay.

Garth, you go over to that boy's place and take him out on an apology date.

Although, he does believe the squad/Substitutes kids on the glove thing. So, he doesn't think them as unintelligent initially. And he does warm up to them afterwards, saying he hopes to see them next audition. Aww.

WIth Bouncing Boy, we once again see the optimistic guy who has faith in others. But it goes into his background a bit. We learn that he wasn't automatically accepted into the Legion. But instead it took him four tries before getting in.

Four.

Give this guy an award for determination.

Now it even makes more sense why he would volunteer to help applicants prepare for the auditions. He knows how it feels to be rejected, but he eventually got it, so he wants to give others as much guidance as possible. He was the right person to give the rejected applicants a pep talk afterwards.

It was kind of funny when he sees the Squad arrive in space, and told them that when he said "When I said keep trying, I meant next year." So, he's not trying to get these kids to endanger themselves.

And the part where he says he believes the Squad? Perfect.

Bouncing Boy is a perfect person.

And on the other hand... character development with Brainy...

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOY.

So he's mostly annoyed with the auditions as well. Not to the same level as Lightning Lad. But he is much more dubious of those who didn't make it in, and when told to examine the glove, he shoves the cannon to Lightning Lad angrily. So, clearly, he has a lower opinion that Lightning Lad of the rejects.

He does seem to apologize afterwards, but clearly he's the type who doesn't seem to think highly of others initially. Making it hard to socialize with.

And then there is the solution he came up with. Making the ionosphere inhospitable with the chance of incinerating part of the atmosphere.

While the chance of dooming the planet wasn't that high, it was still a major issue. But Brainy insisted it had to be done. Thank god the Squad came in with the glove.

But the fact he was ready to overlook the risk to get rid of the monsters does show some of his darker nature. We've seen a less dark thing regarding him withholding info from Superman and the others. But this episode? This was a major thing to remember for season 2.

We also see signs of a bit of development with Superman, but not from this episode. It's from the last episode. Regarding Brainy.

When the cannon finishes charging up, he comments "I just hope we're not about to save the world by destroying it." That was directed to Brainy.

The Superman from the earlier episodes – particularly the range from first to seventh or eigth – wouldn't have said something like that. But think about what happened last time. He found out Brainy neglected telling him important things – the Alignment and the fact his powers depend on the yellow sun. He knows now Brainy has questionable morality. Not necessarily wrong in terms of the long run usually, but not entirely good with its current impact.

Does this mean their relationship has taken a turn for the worst? No. It means he's seeing Brainy more as a real person. A person with flaws.

And with that, can go to try helping him address those flaws.

And now the rest of the Legion. Most of them didn't get that much character development but I can make a few comments.

Saturn Girl is bad ass. She threatened Star Finger with having Matter-Eater Lad EATING PART OF HIM. And I don't think she's the type for lying in serious situations.

Phantom Girl and Timber Wolf don't have speaking roles, but I certainly want to know where they were when they weren't seen at the auditions.

As for the new comers, we got Star Boy and Matter-Eater Lad.

First, on Star Boy's character.

In most adaptations of the comics, Star Boy is depicted as white. However, in the 2005 reboot, he was changed to be Black. And anyone who knows me well knows I am the type to celebrate any POC hero/protagonist. 

Hence why anyone following me found their dash being flooded with Black Panther when the trailer came out. 

And my extreme bitterness on the fact the show's final product had lightened Triplicate Girl's skin color in comparison to the concept art.  

So I appreciate the fact that Star Boy was presented as Black in this show.

Speaking of Black Panther...

PLEASE GO SEE THE MOVIE WHEN IT COMES OUT WHEREVER YOU LIVE IF POSSIBLE.

In this episode, he doesn't have any speaking parts, like Wave. But he is expressive. Much more expressive. And isn't afraid of putting Lightning Lad in his place.

Despite the disappointing lack of development in this episode, he would get more development in Season 2 thankfully.

With Matter-Eater Lad, we do see he and Lightning Lad do have a friendship. And that he won't balk at the idea of eating living things. Making it even more likely he would have bitten some part of Star Finger off.

We once again see some of the other Legionnaires though. The list includes Element Lad, Tyroc, Sun Boy and Blok. And if you look carefully, also Shrinking Violet (although only towards the end). They don't get developed.

Now, the Villain of the episode.

Star Finger is an absolute JOY. And is one of the show's best villains because of his dramatic personality. He's not realistic or complex like Mekt or Alexis, and he's not threatening like the LSV, Londo, or (arguably) the F5 (I say arguably because let's face it, they aren't that interesting but the show is written so that the Legion considers them a threat). But he has so much personality you can't help but admire his antics in the show.

As for his personality, he is very dramatic. And clearly lacks much concern, as seen with the Star Minions.

HE JUST STEALS THE CROWN FROM ONE AND LETS IT FLOAT AWAY.

As a villain in terms of personality, he is a villain written well. He's written in a way that wanting to be a villain/criminal to strike fear into people seems legit. In comparison to Drax, he is the better written guy. An arc is unlikely, but he is still very enjoyable.

And now for the Substitutes, aka Reject Squad.

Chlorophyll Kid is another overweight character who is not written as someone obsessing over food. He is timid, and while he can't control plants – particularly the man eating ones, he does figure out how to use them effectively in some degree.

Stone Boy didn't get a lot of development in the episode, due to a combo of both not being a talker and constantly turning into stone for long durations. But he is very smart, given he made calculations on when he was falling back to Earth. SCIENCE MAJOR MATERIAL.

Infectious Lass. While I do like her in the cartoon, I do like the version they had in the cartoon's comic more. Mainly because she had more personality, but that can be because it focused on her. But she is still great in the show. She is definitely more vulnerable emotionally than any of the other girls we've seen on this show, which I appreciate. We need diverse personalities. And I love the fact they gave her an inhaler and made her sound like she had a cold.

Color Kid is very energetic, and almost on Star Finger's level of flamboyant. Not ignoring that rainbow triangle on his chest. Unlike the rest of the squad though, he is less aware of danger and why exactly he didn't make the cut. But I would sell my soul for his skills with color though. I think ANY ARTIST WOULD.

And then there is my favorite, Porcupine Pete. We’ve already seen him before, and we see that he is written consistently in this show. Massive Legion fan, adorkable. And no one can pry me away from the idea he has a crush on Lighting Lad-senpai. But we also see he has a close relationship with his mom. And he can hurt others easily with his quills, although unintentionally. As seen as when he saves a girl in the pool and she is unfortunate enough to get covered in them.

He assumes leadership of the Reject Squad. He isn't always sure what the best course of action is, but isn't afraid to ask for help. He doesn't let pride interfere.

Very different from Lightning Lad-senpai.

We also see him develop confidence in this episode. Which I love.

Well, that's all for now. Hopefully my next review won't take too long, given I’m on winter break. But I have work, and I don’t think we need to ask on what work in retail is like during holiday seasons.

But meanwhile, I was hoping if I could get some feedback on the gifs, particularly with the fonts. If you think there’s anything I can change to improve them, lemme know.

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE FOUR

“ ‘something will be unleashed’ are u gonna start KILLING PEOPLE??” - saira

HOH: Nick UPSIDE DOWN: Emma & Kiki NOMINEES: Monty & Saira POV: Jev FINAL NOMINEES: Monty & Saira EVICTED: Saira (1-0)

JOSH C

well, we just voted out GINA and i'm feeling some kind of way about it. i feel like the push to save emma was VERY quick and i think there are a lot of alliances going on that i'm not involved in which is FINE but it's just something i need to watch out for. i know i talk with almost everyone constantly so i think i'll be okay for this week, but i'm just worried about the people that i enjoy.

a lot of people have said they don't talk to saira or brianna so i wouldn't be shocked to see them both go up, which is FINE i guess but i enjoy both. i don't want saira to leave at all but i don't think she has as GOOD of a social standing as brianna does. which is worrisome because i know this is her first game so she doesn't have any pre-existing relationships to save her which is.. not ideal.

i'm finding things a BIT frustrating because i have to navigate not ONLY game thoughts but people's pre-game relationships. not that i'm knocking anyone for them but almost everyone i've talked to says they don't talk to monty but they wouldn't want to see him nominated. i just don't FULLY understand why we can't nominate him but they're friends with him so he's a bit UNTOUCHABLE. i might push it anyways because he's the only person i don't really talk to anymore. WHO KNOWS.

i've felt like a deflated balloon for most of today so maybe i'll just go with the flow on this but i need to make sure i'm not just voting out all the people who will be votes for me later on. 

ARIA

Im small, bitter, and very angry...but spite is the best motivator and im going to use it to win this season. Anyways i miss saira im SICK of trusting nicks, i see a nick i FLOOR IT!!! I refuse to have a nick fuck me over in a game again i am so over it. But hehe anyways lets get into the info spilling section real fast and then i can analyze because my position has drastically changed from last time-

also sorry for repeated info but sometimes i forget things or people say it again so..

-nathan leaked "all" his alliances to me (Screensht is cut weird i think theres one he cut off)

-Jacob found out my gina connection

-perfect voting record is dead (told jacob i voted out gina tho idk why hehe)

-kiki-joey connection 

-emma knows about bri's backups because jake leaked it to her before he left

-josh c IS EVERYWHERE

-nick says they havent talked to bri

-nick likes jev

-nick wants (more so wants others) to take a shot at kiki/nash

-nick said nathan is a wildcard 

-joshua nommed monty and nash

-STOP UNDERESTIMATING JOSHUA

-told josha jacob is protecting him

-joey exposed saira's deal to me and bri

-joey wants a larger alliance

-bri said they like nick,,,but that conflicts earlier info so im thinking peer pressure or just bri is too sweet for this cast and i adore her-

-bri told nathan her noms

-nathan hates bri and for wHAT??

-jacob has a dpov and used it to cement a f2,, AND DID THE SAME THING WITH BRI FFS 

-jacob scared of nick and jev

-kiki and nash tell everything to jacob

-jacob said emma and joey have a connection??

-jacob thinks nick is gonna join the emma jev joey side (his words)

-jacob thinks monty is a threat

-jacob ranked the players in tiers as follows: 

A kiki jev bri

B joey joshua nathan

d: nash saira monty

-bri talks a lot with kiki and josh c

-told bri about the trio between jacob kiki and nash

-joey told me yesterday he wants to win,,,but then just said to take him out

-planting seeds against joey to bri

-jacob wants to bring dpov up with alliance at f10

-joshua and jacob were shook saira was evicted

-told jacob that joey asked to throw

-jev and jacob are getting closish

-jacob is so threaten by nick

-jacob told bri that nathan doesnt like her

-

and thats where im at currently. Lots of options and lots of interconnections I have to navigate but i think im gonna be fine for the time being which makes it super easy to just be complacent and float my way to jury BUT!!! I want to try setting myself up well where i dont get clocked at f9/10 and wabam im out. Im trying to set people against each other subtly but honestly i think im overestimating myself here but at least i know im safe. I mean for now im trying to set up this side of jev emma joshua to at least form together as a group but im STRUGGLING i might just have to settle for them keeping each other safe without a solid alliance ig. At the same time I think i really have two actives pieces of info im working with which is emma knowing about bri's backups and then me and bri knowing about jacob's dpov.

So i think what I want to happen is that Jacob wants to dpov nick out at f10 so i'll let that happen probably which puts a huge target on jacobs back, idk if its anon but if it is ill make sure bri leaks it kinda framing it in a "if you leak it and i pretend to not know i can analyze how other people respond so we'll know what everyone thinks" and once jacob leaves emma can leak the bri's angels (which should be weaker at this point since jacob is the glue that holds it together a bit) which #1 makes a bunch of good players house targets and then forces those people to solidly stick together as well. Not sure how im gonna play both sides but,,,,if i can play it off kinda like i did in pasio somehow maybe i'll be fine but who knows. Either way im here to have fun (and hopefully win for gina/saira)

WELL WELL!!! just did a vc with jacob, he decided to take matters into his own hands and be totally cracked and now thinks nick/monty/nathan are a side,,,,which,,,,idk yall nathan did show me all of his alliances and none of them were that but who am i to stop jacob from making himself a target by leading this charge against them uwu. I do need to be more proactive about leaking tho but im not sure how im gonna work that. Also im not sure if i want nick/monty/nathan all gone, i can live with monty gone bc they probably think i nommed them and might want revenge but also nick and nathan are kinda cute numbers for me,,, 

I mean idk because at this point i have a game relationship with mostly everyone left in this game and im just not sure which path i need to take to get to the end yet and its kindaaa stressing me out a little bit. I can feel myself starting to drop in peoples trust rankings a little bit and god its kinda annoying how jacob has this game wrapped around his finger, however i dont need to be in a dominant position this entire game i believe in myself!! I got this easy peasy!!! 

JEV

My reverse psychology paid off and I won the veto so I'm loving that for me, I'm not going to be using it because I'd preferably like to see Monty leave because I just... never see them and I think Saira is much more deserving of her place here than Monty is. It's frustrating that Monty is cruising through this game so easily because we haven't spoken to eachother since day one, and they haven't even bothered to come and speak to me to campaign for me to use the veto. Like, do you want to be here or not?

Thinking about it more, I'm super happy I won the power of veto. I managed to ensure myself and those I'm closest to in this game weren't going to be named as renom and kept Monty up there as a final nom, which I'm worried otherwise wouldn't happen during this game since people seem either threatened by Monty OR a little over-eager to keep him around in this game, which annoys me but whatever. I just hope whoever wins HOH has the balls to make the right decision, better to get him gone now rather than later.

JEV

So I think I've had a little bit of a brainwave/breakthrough. This is gonna be longwinded so hear me out.

Apparently from what I've heard, the nominations this week were revealed in order of who recieved the least to the most nominations from every

one. This is extremely interesting to me, as I've taken note that Nick, Aria, Jacob & Brianna were 10th-8th in the rankings of votes respectively.

First of all, I haven't made secret that I think something is going on with the Pasio alumni. This was highlighted when I was asking around for what people were doing for nominees, and from everyone I heard Saira/Monty, but from two people I heard Saira, Nash, Joey & Monty -- with Monty strategically placed last in the ranking, to give the illusion his name was the least uttered. Funnily enough, the two people I heard this format of the names were Nick and Aria who just happen to be Pasio alumni... interesting, right?

So looking at the ranking, I'm thinking "okay so they obviously didn't do eachother, and with Nash/Joey in 3rd and 4th respectively, they must've not expected so many votes on Monty and didn't plan accordingly, and so split the votes too much and didn't have enough to put up Nash or Joey over Monty. So I'm thinking, I know there's a connection between Jacob and Monty because I used to play orgs with them on Skype. Jacob used the veto on Brianna last week, this has brought me to the conclusion that Monty, Nick, Brianna, Jacob & Aria are working together with the possibility that Josh C is either playing both sides or is fully with them too, hence why he recieved the least votes.

That places Myself, Emma, Kiki, Nash, Joshua, Joey & Saira on the outside, and Nathan too as I'm guessing he's strayed from their alliance and/or wishing to work with them, hence why he recieved 5th most votes. 

I'd love to make an alliance with this group of people, but it's still only pre-jury and I don't want to be seen as playing too hard too soon.

(cont.) So I initially wasn't going to go for this HOH, but I feel like I need to because I can't trust anybody else to make the move to take Monty out, and I'd rather see their numbers thinned sooner rather than later. It would paint me as their #1 target for next week probably, but if someone I trusted won HOH next week then I could go to the upside down and not have to worry about it.

JEV

Yes again I'm so sorry, another thing that was interesting to me was that I mentioned to Aria that I was close with Emma, and she asked for an alliance with the 3 of us almost immediately after, stating that she was also "very interested" in working with Emma too. This tells me she's the mole and wanted the alliance to try and get intel from us, I don't believe for a second she did Saira/Monty along with me and Emma at all, which is why myself and Emma are hesitant to say too much in that alliance chat. So I like Aria, but I don't trust her as far as I can throw her.

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hL__dyRaq2E&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=5&t=0s

[wildflower8281]

Bike Life Deep Dive

Recap

I’ve been living the bike life now for almost a year and a half here in downtown Phoenix. After a small fender that busted up my beloved Max (Ford Taurus, very old, no AC, leaking roof, but helpful!) I decided to let him go, and with him, all the trappings of car ownership. For a trial run. I said I would try out the #bikelife for 3-6 months and see how I like it, see how or if I could adjust my lifestyle to it, and whether or not the bike life was overall something of true value for me, both internally and financially.

In my initial #bikelife post last year (Adventures in Not Owning A Car,) I enumerate the various financial benefits and reasons why the bike life was, for me personally, economically savvy. It has still most definitely proven so and I’ve adjusted even more to the lifestyle, having since made further changes and routines that create an easier flow for me. I continue to confess that I know that living this lifestyle is a privilege! I deliberately chose a home close to where I work and I have zero dependents, and my Aunt Barb has lent me her bike indefinitely as long as I live in Arizona (Thanks, Aunt Barb!) Also, for what it’s worth, I am very much an introverted homebody, so I’m not someone who is or constantly needs to be out and about. Thus, relying on Lyft for occasional trips is very within my budget. Also, since most of my social plans are with family or friends and happen relatively close to me, I gratefully take up their offers on rides and happily return the favor with coffee or drinks or gas money. Thus, this entire situation it’s not a life circumstance that most people are in and I know that. I am grateful for this season in my life when I can live this way and in this post, I want to explore and reflect beyond just the financial benefits, because the #bikelife has in many ways enriched my entire experience of the world.

The Nature Connect

The bike life connects me to the natural world. I used to think that Phoenix had pleasant weather pretty much year ‘round….until I began biking in it!!! While Phoenix may not “have weather” frequently, when it does, this place doesn’t mess around! If it’s not pleasant and sunny (which, honestly, it is like 80% of the year,) then it’s either extremely hot and dry reaching temps over 100 for weeks at a time, pouring monsoon-like storms or we are having the coldest winter since 2013! Phoenix doesn’t mess and when it actually allows weather into the Valley, it is always something extreme. But this is actually a positive point here! I have grown to love biking in the all the weathers! I am actually really proud to say that I bike to work in all the seasons here! I bike to work in the Arizona summers, and I bike on the mornings when it’s under 40! If you would have told me two years ago, that I would be biking to my job in under 40 degree weather, and enjoying it, I would not have believed you. But, I actually do enjoy it. Even for this girl who despises being cold generally, the Aliveness I feel each day I get to go outside, feel the weather and experience the Elements on my skin far outweighs any uncomfortable moments of cold hands in January or radiating heat on my neck during July. Biking brings me into the natural world each day, kind of whether I like it or not, and that daily dose of weather, even when it is extreme, is good medicine for my entire being! Its my few minutes of feeling the sun on my face or the rush of the cold. Many times it is the only 30 minutes I am outside on any given day. On some days when I’m just tired of packing my bag, putting on my helmet and going thru the routine, ultimately it’s the connect with nature in Her seasons that pull me through and never really let me down. I arrive to work refreshed and in a better mood, pretty much never fail! (Yes, I have my limits too: for monsoons and over 115 degrees, I use Lyft or call a neighbor, but that is literally under 10x a year!)

(Photo: Me in my usual bike get-up on a cold day, going home. Cred: Mirinda, also seen in reflection, encouraging as always!)

Less Stress

Biking also kind of just simplifies the commute. I have 2 choices each day: bike or walk. Both are relatively simple and low maintenance transportation styles. This season, I *may have* chuckled as I rode by various folks standing by their cars, waiting for them to heat up and melt the frost on their windshield.... 

In the summer, I ride by parked cars that are humming, as they build up their AC inside, so the owner doesn’t suffocate at 125 degrees upon entrance. In the 10 minutes it takes them to cool down their car, then sit in traffic, I’m having a peaceful bike ride, enjoying nature and arriving at the same time! It’s pretty fantastic most days! I ride by folks with flat tires, fenders, and cars that seem like they probably shouldn’t be cars anymore! I also know the awesome feeling of driving a car without AC here in the desert summer, as well as one that has an ironically leaking roof. In the desert, where one would not think much about rain problems or that a leaky roof would be an issue, it totally sucks during monsoon season! I feel the human with car troubles, believe me! I’ve had them too! However, these are all situations I have left behind and can very simply pedal by and be grateful that I don’t have to deal with or worry about them. Not owning a car just makes the daily commute a lot simpler!

(Photo: Unsplash)

Moving Meditation

I’ve learned I prefer the slower pace of biking and walking to work much more than driving. When I bike or walk to work, once I’m out of my neighborhood, I’m on some major streets where cars are whizzing by in their AC or heated seats, with radio blasting, trying to make it thru the ‘orange’ light! That was me for most of my former driving life, so no judgement here. I was a car owner from age 17-35, so I love a good car dance and I will never turn down heated seats! However, biking and walking are organically a much slower pace. They cause me to notice the plants, the trees, the flowers I pass by daily, and watch them transform through the seasons. Biking and walking allows me to enjoy the songs of the birds and say hello to all the neighborhood pups and kittens. I’m not being sappy here, these are things that truly make me happy. I’ve even noticed how the sun rises and sets at different angles in the sky, as the seasons change, which in some deep way makes me feel more connected to All That Is. On the way home, I get to revel in some of the best views of our Arizona sunsets, as I can linger wherever I want, stop and gaze at the sky and allow myself to be mesmerized by the palette of magenta pinks and fiery oranges. Not to mention inhale the yummy wafts of dinner that swirl through the evening air in Coronado (my eclectic neighborhood!) - Italian garlic and Indian curries are the usual fare! YUM! It’s delightful! These little nuances are imperceptible to the whizzing car with blasting music. The slower pace allows me to tune into the subtler moments, cycles and patterns of life, as well as engage my senses much more, all which for me, enhance my entire experience of the day, and consequently of the seasons in my own life. It is quite literally a moving meditation.

Gratitude

So, how is the bike life going, do I still like it, is it worth it?! Yes, for many reasons! Financially, it definitely is an amazing option that I have in my present situation. But, of even more value, are the daily, small ways that this lifestyle pulls me into the present, allows me to feel Nature into my bones and tunes me into the frequency of the Elements. For me, these consequences are gifts that I did not intend and for which I am daily grateful.

(Photo: Sunset taken on a ride home from work.)