#I ALMOST LOST MY COMIC thats why some of it is green

[personallyfive]

jealous

[alygatorwrites]

can I request a lil something? during the end of the manga or after the timeskip if you haven't read it yet, reiner still has feelings for historia and reader has one-sided feelings for him.

pieck gives reiner a small hint, saying he's wasting time while there's someone close to him that cares for him and points to you. he doesn't understand at first and maybe is conflicted about his feelings for you because of historia. reader is cool about it as she doesn't expect him to reciprocate her feelings.

a rollercoaster of emotions later, maybe there is a happy ending tho? i am curious to see what you can come up with 😭😭 i have dreaming of this scenario before bed and i can't help but get jealous of his crush on historia abjdsndks maybe you can help reiner reciprocate reader-chan's feelings or not

thank u so much aly 💖🥺

reciprocation

pairing: reiner braun x reader

a/n: OMG yesss! honestly, i was kinda annoyed at how reiner still had a crush on historia. i know that isayama wanted to show how everything went back to normal, but i was hoping that reiner would have a bigger role in the allied nations instead of being "dumbed down" to having an obsession with her. MAYBE THATS JUST THE JEALOUSY SPEAKING LMAO 😭 i was hoping this would be longer, although school has been killing me so im really sorry!! i hope its okay 💗💕 thank you honey!

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as reiner is handed historia’s letter, you fold your hands on the table and watch him without a word. when he reads the lines and smells the parchment - jean saying something snarky afterward - you say nothing.

you want reiner to be happy: you want to see him at ease like this more, face soft as the leaf of the page flits from his pinched fingers.

and so you let the man speak about historia like she’s a damn goddess, gushing over her handwriting, and keep your goddamn mouth shut. ignore your jealousy. your feelings.

the truth is, you’re in love with reiner.

you can’t even remember how it happened, but you can remember the first time you looked into those hazel eyes, and how you knew that they were going to stick with you for eternity.

you’ve come to accept his crush on the queen, though. reciprocation was never an option in your mind.

when jean begins to chew reiner out for lusting after a married woman, and reiner says something about jean being a horse, pieck’s gaze lands on you. “you’re rather quiet,” she says softly, resting her head on her palm.

you shrug, turning away from her. “i’m just tired.”

pieck catches your chin between her lithe fingers, and turns you to face her with a tiny smile. the young woman is very perceptive, and you’ve known her long enough. 

that’s when you notice the twinkle in her eye. she’s planning something.

pieck releases your jaw then, sitting up in her chair. “you’re wasting your time, reiner,” she says suddenly. “there’s already someone you know who cares for you.”

you pretend to not hear pieck - and definitely pretend you don’t see her faintly point at you through your peripheral. the movement of her fingers is barely there, but you catch it.

damn you, pieck.

the way you’re now pinned underneath armin, jean, connie, and reiner’s stares makes your stomach tie itself into knots with bubbling reluctance. shit, this is awkward. you want to run away.

still, you peer over to study reiner’s reaction. he looks confused at first, the contours of his face unreadable. you swear you see connie facepalm at the man’s cluelessness.

then reiner’s expression slowly changes: his eyes widen in awe, lips parting slightly, and brows knitting together. he seems genuinely surprised - and conflicted.

conflicted? why?

there’s no time to explain yourself though, because the door creaks open and annie steps in. her words fall on your deaf ears, and when everyone stands up to leave, you’re the first one out of the room. work beckons you as always.

two days pass.

you’ve been busy filling out tons of paperwork pertaining to the allied nations, so when you’re finally given a day off, you take it with open arms. 

freedom at last.

you lean against a bench outside of headquarters, enjoying the salty breeze that flutters along your skin. it’s dusk, the sky covered in a gradient of neon colors as the sun dips below the horizon.

you haven’t seen reiner since that day in the conference room. you wonder how he’s doing, what he’s thinking, how he’s holding up -

“hey.”

speak of the devil. you glance over your shoulder toward the voice, low and familiar.

reiner approaches you, clad in his uniform: the suit hugs his large frame perfectly, showing every flex of his muscles, and his blonde hair is neatly parted. the black tie looped around his neck just pulls it all together. it has you weak at the knees every. single. time.

“hey,” you answer, giving reiner a smile as he stops beside you.

and that’s when your heart lurches at the sight of him.

the sunset highlights reiner’s profile in gold, a heavenly shine that settles upon his blonde lashes and the flawless slope of his nose. the flecks in his irises sparkle – a beautiful mixture of soft browns and muted greens. the only thing you can do right now is admire the man. 

his words are what breaks you out of your daydream.

“work has been crazy lately, huh?” reiner says, focused on the candy-floss clouds and their fluffy shapes.

“well - yeah, pretty much. i don’t want to look at a pen or a piece of paper ever again.”

“that bad?”

“you have no idea. i almost regret marley and paradis reconciling.”

reiner chuckles gently at the joke, but it’s strained. his forehead remains creased, and he’s not really smiling. the emotion there is more … doubtful. it’s like he’s having some sort of inner conflict.

hopefully reiner’s not acting cautious because of the other day. you know he doesn’t return your feelings, and that’s totally okay. you’re happy enough being with him like this. “i’m not mad or anything, y’know.”

reiner stiffens at that. there’s a white flash of teeth when he chews on his lower lip. “i know.”

“good,” you hum, breathing out a sigh of relief. your core twists with envy when you force a grin. bite it back. tease him like always. “so about historia … ”

reiner’s eyes go wide almost comically, and you hear the breath in his lungs leave his firm chest in one exhale. there’s a light blush staining his cheeks now. it’s funny; he’s so goddamn big, yet he’s such a teddy bear.

“y-yeah,” reiner mutters. you observe the way his brows pinch together as he awkwardly shifts in place. it takes a while before the man composes himself again, which is strange.

is he scared or something? what the hell?

“pieck,” reiner hesitates for a moment. the golden strands of his hair ruffle in the wind and he appears ... well, lost. “was she being serious?”

the question is a shocker - jeez, he could have at least let you prepare yourself. a firm ‘no’ almost slips out, but you’ve never been much of a liar. not to reiner, anyway. crossing your arms against your chest, you inhale sharply and nod. avoid staring at him face-to-face. “yep.”

“ … why me?”

reiner says the words with a mixture of spite and anguish, a casual and rumbling voice. you immediately turn your head, frowning. “what?”

“i’ve done so many horrible things.” reiner exhales heavily and stares down at his hands; perhaps he’s imagining all the blood they’ve been stained with. “i betrayed everyone. i killed innocent people - all because i was selfish.”

it’s no surprise that reiner is broken after everything he’s been through, but it pains you to know that he continues to suffer in silence. whatever war is raging inside his ribcage tears him apart piece by piece, and you wish you could carry the burden. 

there’s probably nothing you can say to convince reiner that he was just a kid, a victim of circumstance. there’s nothing that can persuade him to see himself the way you do.

so you decide to tell reiner why you love him. 

you explain the amount of admiration you hold for him. tell him that you love the way he just wants to be someone his comrades can lean on, like a big brother. tell him that you think he’s the most gorgeous person you’ve ever seen and how you think he deserves the world.

the way you spill your guts out snaps every nerve in your body. you don’t say everything you want to – but you tell him enough. a dark flush spreading across your face, you find the courage to look at him.

the world seems to stop on its axis when you find reiner staring right on back. the intensity of his eyes is stunning; they’re lit up with astonishment and affection.

god, the affection. you see it clear as day. maybe one of the greatest regrets in his life is how he forced himself to see you only as a friend.

that’s when he reaches out to you.

reiner retracts his hand twice, unsure, before slowly brushing his fingertips against yours. the touch is so feather-light that you almost can’t feel it. it’s a test - he’s waiting to see if you pull away. you can’t even move if you wanted to, because his fond gaze keeps you rooted to the spot before him. 

when you don’t recoil, reiner finally moves to gently hold your hand; his palm is so much bigger than yours, and your fingers slot together perfectly, like a jigsaw puzzle’s final piece. 

heart thrumming like a hummingbird has been stuffed into your chest, you’re almost at a loss for words and come to a realization.

this utterly amazing man likes you. always has. 

but reiner shoved away the feelings for one simple reason; you deserved ‘better.’ focusing on the old crush he had on historia was a distraction - an attempt to convince himself to stop thinking about you.

because looking at you everyday and not being able to act upon his feelings was too painful.

“is this okay?” reiner asks lowly. there’s a slight pinkness to his cheeks, the color of a selfless love.

by some miracle, you manage to nod dumbly. “yeah, of course. it’s fine.” it’s amazing is what you actually want to say.  

reiner squeezes your hand at the reassurance, a sigh escaping from his throat. “i really—”

you wait for him to finish, but he doesn’t. reiner just searches your profile for signs of discomfort, and then untwines your hands to bravely swipe a thumb along the length of your cheekbone. 

there’s no time to speak because he’s already leaning down.  

the sensation of reiner’s lips pressing against yours lights your skin ablaze; you can feel the curling flames of passion sear your soul, made even more intense by the warmth of the sunlight on your back.

it’s natural, it’s tender, it’s warm.

reiner’s breath rattles into your mouth when you rest both palms against his solid chest and deepen the kiss. the musky smell of his aftershave and cologne envelops you completely, and fuck, it’s so good. your arms wrap around him, fingers passing over the sharp slopes of his shoulder blades.

as much as you wish the kiss could go on endlessly, there are people gathering outside. avoiding any unwanted attention from nosy strangers is very much appreciated.

you pull away to nuzzle your nose into reiner, and he rests his chin on your shoulder, protective arms moving to loop around your waist. it’s such an intimate caress that it sparks your brain into overdrive.

as the rushing sound of the breeze comes back to your ears through the quiet, you tuck the kiss away to be remembered forever. that’s all there is to it. being close to reiner like this - swaying together like wildflowers in the wind - is more important than anything else.

“i like you,” reiner murmurs.

the suddenness of it makes you laugh, and you can feel the upward quirk of reiner’s lips - a whisper of a peaceful smile and a sweet, sweet promise.

[perseusjackson-jasongrace]

Any chance of getting something maybe set in the future or smthng where percy is telling either his kids or young demigods about how good and powerful jason was or just recalling some of their old adventures and its Percy's way of getting closure for jason? Can be angsty can be fluff whatever floats yah boat:)

I am not afraid to admit I teared up writing this. I am an emotional bitch. Anyway I hope you enjoy Anon!

Masterlist

"Come on boys, your sister's already in bed." Percy got up from the couch to pick up the stray toys and blankets still littered around the room.

"Can we get a story tonight Pops?" Charles looked up at him with big brown eyes.

"Sure baby, what about?"

"About," Lee looked to his twin and then back at his father, "About daddy?"

He released a soft breath, crouching down so he was at eye level with them.

"Of course, I'm always happy to tell you about your dad."

"Thanks Pops!" They beamed and then raced off to get ready for bed.

Percy stood up to lean against the wall, letting the ache of missing his husband wash over him. It pressed against his ribs, made breathing an impossibility. Blue eyes, bright with laughter flashed through his mind. He blinked the tears away, now was not the time to break down.

"Zoe, you want to come listen to the story?"

"What's the story?" She scrunched her nose, "I don't want to hear about the princess and the dragon. Everyone knows she should have made friends with the dragon and gone on amazing adventures."

He struggled to hold in a laugh as she rolled her pale green eyes, "You don't have to worry tonight, it's a story about dad."

She lit up then, smile as bright as the sun, "You're gonna tell us about dad? Yes let's go!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him to her brothers' room.

He didn't bother to keep his laugh in this time, letting her drag him through the house.

In a matter of moments the boys were tucked into their beds. Zoe was climbing onto his lap as he tried to get comfy on the bean bag sat in the middle of the room.

"Okay you want to hear about a time we killed a monster or time at camp or something else?"

"Monster!" Zoe and Charles cheered.

"Camp," Lee said softly.

"Okay you little gremlins how about both? I'll tell you the story about how your dad accidentally stabbed me."

They nodded, smuggling deeper into their beds and looked at him expectantly.

"It was around the middle of summer, actually your dad's birthday. And I had planned to have a picnic in the strawberry fields. We only had the day to be together because it was Capture the Flag that night and you know your Aunt Annabeth was a tyrant when it came to camp games," He winked, making them giggle.

Lee furrowed his little brow. "Why were you going to the strawberry fields?"

"Yea why not the woods, or the beach?" Charles asked.

"Your dad never really liked the beach. He says there's too much sand and too much water," He laughed softly, "And the woods aren't really that safe. It's better to stay well within camp boarders."

"But why—" Charles started up again.

"Charlie," Zoe scolded, "Let Pops finish the story. You can ask questions later."

"Nobody asked you Zoe," He stuck his tongue out.

Lee untucked his arm and held it off the bed expectantly. His twin sighed and clasped their hands together.

"Later Charlie,"

Percy's heart skipped a beat, as it always did when the twins acted like this. It was Jason's favourite thing about them—that silent understanding, that unspoken bond.

"Carry on Pops," Lee nodded solemnly.

"We had a little party for dad in the dining hall with a silly lightning bolt shaped cake and cloud cupcakes." He didn't tell them that all the drinks were same shade of green as his eyes because that was his husband's favourite colour. Or that Jason had pulled him in and kissed him so hard they had almost started a hurricane right there.

"I had asked my friends to help me set up a picnic blanket and a basket in the fields so we could go after breakfast. But when we got there everything had been trampled and broken."

Zoe gasped, slapping a hand over her mouth.

"Oh no," Lee's face pulled in horror.

"Who did it Pops? What happened?" Charles was sitting up now, his hand still firmly holding his twin's.

He gave them a wide eyed look, struggling to hold back his laugh at their intent expressions.

"Well we were both very confused and quickly took our swords out but then we heard a rustle from behind us. We turned around and sitting on a rock was this huge serpent. It was brown and swampy green with two giant horns on its head. And it was just staring at us."

"Your dad tried to get closer but before he could strike his sword this thing was moving towards us. It jumped on me and I fell to the ground."

They all let out a comically loud gasp.

"My sword fell out of my hand. But your dad was there and he sliced his sword down on it. Except he missed the monster because it moves so fast and his sword hit me instead."

Charles groaned, falling back onto his pillow.

"Come on Pops what happened?" Zoe bounced, looking up at him.

"So I'm injured, the monster is still slithering everywhere and your dad is trying to make sure I'm not gonna die. Before he could get me some ambrosia the serpent is back and striking at him. That's when I finally grab all the water from the strawberries and throw it at the monster. And then it crumbled to dust. Guess it wasn't thirsty huh?"

He didn't tell them he choked that creature till it didn't know the difference between blood and water, didn't tell them he nearly died trying to control so much with an injury. Didn't tell them the fury he felt when it had tried to attack his boyfriend.

"Uncle Grover was not happy with me because all the strawberries died but your dad and i made it back to the infirmary and we got all better. Which was great because Aunt Annabeth and Aunt Clarisse would have killed us if we couldn't participate in Capture the Flag." He laughed.

"What was the monster Pops?" Lee asked, earthy eyes wide.

Zoe frowned, "Yea and how did it get in? I thought camp was protected. "

"And who won capture the flag?" Charles waved his hands impatiently.

"We found out the monster was called Cerastes and it probably dug itself up under the borders. There was a whole maze running under camp, but it collapsed after Aunt Annabeth and I helped the creator out."

Zoe squealed, "Can we hear that story next?"

"Maybe another night, princess. And to answer your question Charlie," He smiled at his son, "Clarisse's team won capture the flag. Your dad and and Aunt Clarisse made us clean toilets for a week because we lost."

"Aw daddy," Lee scrunched his nose.

"Yes Annabeth was very unimpressed with them. Alright, time to sleep now."

"Pops," Zoe hugged his neck, "I miss dad."

He wrapped his arms around her little body, "Me too princess. But someday we will all see each other again."

Lee looked at him curiously, "How do you know?"

"Because your dad is in a very special place and if you guys continue to be brave and kind you will also go to that special place and you will see him again."

"And will you be there?" Charles tugged at his hand.

"I hope so. I think if you all give me kisses I'll be able to trade them in when the time comes."

They pounced on him, dissolving into giggles as he kissed them back and tickled their little feet.

"I love you guys, and your dad loved you more than all the stars in the sky." He looked at each of them, green eyes bright with love and sorrow.

"We love you too Pops." Charles let out a yawn.

"Yea, love you Pops." Lee climbed back into bed, "Are we getting pancakes tomorrow?"

"It is birthday tradition," He grinned at them, "And especially since you're becoming old men. Pancakes are soft so you don't have to chew when your teeth start falling out."

"Our teeth fall out?" Charles gave him an appalled look.

"Only if you don't brush your teeth Charlie." Zoe said matter of factly.

"Thats right," He held in a laugh at her serious expression.

"Goodnight little ones." He picked his daughter up, switching off the lights and closing the door halfway.

"You ready for bed princess?"

"Mhm Pops," She blinked slowly, "Can I help you make pancakes tomorrow?"

"Yes please," He laid her down gently, "You're the best sous chef ever."

Her answering beam made his chest tighten.

"I love you Pops. Thank you for the story."

"Was it to your satisfaction?" He flicked her nose softly.

"I like when you and dad save each other," She burrowed into her blankets, "It's much better when you do things together, instead of those silly princes who want to save the princess but don't let her help."

He shook his head in amusement, "When you go on your own adventures remember to do things together."

"We're gonna be a team." She gave him a determined look and then yawned.

He kissed her forehead and pulled up the blankets before leaving the room.

With a sigh he escaped to his own bed, sitting down with the heaviness of longing.

Jason and him weren't just a team; they were the question and answer, the sun and the moon, the beginning, middle and end.

He picked up the framed picture of them on their wedding day, Jason's blue eyes bright with happiness, and Percy looking at his husband like he hung the stars in the sky just so their glow could shine onto this love.

"I miss you my Saving Grace," He whispered.

And then laughed, as he felt the soft caress of wind brushing over his damp cheeks and dancing between his fingers.

"I love you."

[mikenewtonhateblog]

My oc’s aka too long of a gd post

The “BL” Crew (does not stand for boys love I’m just a moron who made that abbreviation before knowing what it stands for). My main crew and main series, a lot is a big WIP right now as I’m slowly redoing the first book and all the lore. Why? I love torture. Book is fantasy type but I won’t specify what.

Lacie, the protagonist. God tier idiot, bisexual bipolar depressed MESS, insomniac, former theater kid, doesn’t know what she wants out of life but currently it is not This(plot of book). Hot headed, impulsive, crude, rude, Mommy IssuesTM, would rather be taking a nap right now, rules are made to be broken, absolutely fucking FERAL, more bags under her eyes than the airport lost and found. 5’5, 130lbs, Aries, age 18, white as shit like literally the whitest human you have ever seen, strawberry blonde hair in a 2011 Hayley Willaims haircut with long bangs, the darkest brown eyes you’ve ever seen that stare directly into your soul. Lanky, no curves, body of a 12 year old boy but works out so she can and will kick your ass and thats a threat. Not human?

Josh. Soft boy, smart, Lacie’s cousin and only friend for like the first 18 years of her life, autistic anxious mess who’s special interest is anchient egyptian history, is in honors classes, despises math, passes out when his girlfriend looks too cute, just needs a hug. Can eat a whole carton of easy mac if left alone, whole wardobe is the same outfit just different colors/hoodies, sensory issues, seriously can someone give this guy a hug. 5’9, 150lbs, Pisces, age 18, mixed (half whatever flavor of white Lacie’s family is [they don’t even know its just some scandanavian shit and irish], and half mexican on his mom’s side), medium olive skin with freckles and moles, dark chocolate brown hair that’s a bit of a 2009 Beiber cut, warm brown eyes, not beefy, a lil thicc and self concious about it but squishy boys are GOOD. Gets bit by a werewolf so now he is one his mood on it is “thats a lot to unpack but let’s just throw the whole suitcase away”.

Zander. There is not one braincell in this man, himbo KING, pansexual dumbass with undiagnosed ADHD, no impulse control, head empty and full at the same time, PTSD, his fashion sense should be an actual crime, gets in fights to feel something, basic requirements for him to be attracted to you: kick his ass. Drinks his respect women juice, sees a folding table and must immediately launch himself on it, chaotic, cannot drive a car and will not, food aggression and eats enough for 3 people but never gains weight which is ILLEGAL, him and Lacie may be a couple.....but in this house we stan slow burn, he talks in caps and every sentence either ends with a question mark or exclaimation point, likes romcoms. 6’2, 190lbs, Sagittarius, age 19, austrailian roots and has the accent but is from [REDACTED FOR STORY REASONS], white, dorito shaped with long legs, blueish black hair that’s long and messy, dark navy eyes that match his hair, bigass neck scar from [REDACTED]. Not human

Peter. Gay dad friend who is TIRED of having to be in charge of a bunch of teenagers, only one with full functioning braincells, lowkey a genius who loves engineering, mixes magical technology with human technology because he likes to play god, is he ever sober? No one knows, will kill for a bottle of single malt, his fashion sense? Tastefully expensive suits perfectly tailored. Likes building his own weapons that no one else knows how to even use, generally non-threatening but can get scary if needed. 6’4, 140lbs string bean man, Scorpio, age 179 but looks early 30s, I know I said Lacie is the whitest human but he’s even paler like a literal sheet of paper with scandanavian roots/ancestors were vikings or some shit, blonde hair styled like 2013 Brendon Urie lmfao, light crystal blue eyes. He’s a vampire and was born one.

Danielle. Tiny, sweet, queen of girls supporting girls, comments on all her friends instagram posts with 20 emojis, LOVES fashion and has a wardrobe that would make anyone jealous, oozes feminine energy, only child and parents are in love still, gets exactly 8 hours of sleep each night and wakes up looking like a disney princess. Just because she is small and cute doesn’t mean you should underestimate her she WILL fuck your shit up. Quiet when angey which is terrifying. Josh is her bf and she loves him so much but also loves teashing the shit out of him. Legally cannot cuss, polite, used her high heels as a weapon once, speaks like 5 languages because studying them is her hobby, gardens, hugs everyone. 5’0, 110, Taurus, age 18, mixed (half french-american, half Korean-american), glowy skin always, PETITE frame aka the friend everyone can pick up when they hug, long past her waist curly brown hair, bright green eyes. She’s not fully human as she has fae blood in her and this gives her the ability to talk to and control plants. Flower crowns for everyone

Becca. Theater kid who would die to sing in Wicked and has the vocal range to do so, cannot wait to graduate and go to her dream college which she got into and a scholarship, closeted lesbian bc her whole giant family is extremely catholic and she feels like not dealing with it, “no boys allowed in bedroom” rule is her favorite joke, chill, middle child of 5 siblings and just wants some peace and quiet for ONCE. Her fashion sense is “I’m dropping subtle hints I’m gay but only to other gays”, has a black belt and took self defense classes. 5’6, 145lbs, Virgo, age 18, Latina (cuban and mexican mix), darker brown skin with light freckles over her nose, athletic build, eyebrows on POINT, bright caramel eyes, short light brown hair cut in a bob, has a tiny nose stud, always wears a blue friendship bracelet her gf made her. Human

Anika. Calling her a bitch/slut is a compliment, bisexual, a bit of a mean girl but she grows out of it give her time!!! Is always Too Much, the horny friend, favorite color is red so thats almost all of her outfits, loves to show off her body as much as she can because she’s hot and knows it and thrives in her own confidence. Her mom is literally like Regina George’s mom from Mean Girls but married a rich man 20 years older than her, Anika doesn’t know her bio dad but thats fine neither does her mom and her step dad is nice and does his best to be a dad. Becca’s gf, always hanging out at her home so Becca can get some quiet because Anika’s an only child and has a pool. 5’9, 135lbs, Gemini, age 18, white, long layered dark reddish brown hair, teal-blue eyes, swimmers body type (I normally do not mention bust size but she would want the internet to know she was blessed with big bahoogles so there you go), can sprint in heels. Half mermaid (boy was that a surprise considering her mom doesn’t know who her father is LOL)

Rex. Nb uses they/them he/him pronouns but honestly will respond to any, goth lite, only attracted to men and ace, can read minds so knows all your secrets, mischevious little shit, great friends with Zander and enjoys his dumbass thoughts and that he’s basically a human version of Jackass, wears too many rings, goth boots for kicking and fashion babey, always has the freshest memes and will not hesitate to roast in the group chat, hangs with the girls most of the time. Chaos god who loves making art, be gay do crime, skateboard and spraypaint. 5’8”, 165lbs, Leo, age 18, Native American, masculine frame, dark brown skin, blue eyes, firetruck red shoulder length hair that’s usually in a ponytail, knock-off gucci sunglasses just for judging their friends. Has magic in their blood so not entirely human and can cast spells and shit (don’t roast me its a wip and I’m doing my research)

Sam. Boho goddess, aromantic, makeup and nails are always instagram worthy, quiet and stoic type but losens up around close friends, Rex is her best friend, has some trauma and doesn’t want to talk about it, emotionally numbed out a bit and wants to purely vibe. Has seen some of the worst parts of humanity and wishes she hadn’t, finds no point in being bitter or resentful though because that won’t change anything, loves cats and once she moves out shes adopting one or three. Has wine aunt energy. 5’4, 200lbs PLUS SIZE QUEEN, Scorpio, age 18, Filipino (her parents are immigrants fun fact!), really olive skin sometimes has a grey/green tinge to it, dark brown almost black shoulder length hair, gold-hazel eyes. Sam’s the victim of a family curse that requires her to consume human hearts to survive, she can transform into a pretty scary looking being and uses this curse to hunt down pedoph*les, r*pists, murderers, and abusers. The less often she feeds the less human she looks, hence the constant grey/green tinge to her skin. 

Andy. Baby of the group, must be protected at all costs, 100% didn’t sign up to be in a friendgroup of 90% monsters but highkey loves it, trans, bi, anxiety MAXED, just wants to draw comics and cosplay spiderman, has to babysit his two younger sisters a lot because his parents are....not great, and as a result now knows all the lines to Tangled and The Little Mermaid. Big nerd energy, has to draw on everything including homework, gets inspiration for comics from his friends, awkward and socially anxious, drinks way too much tea and will accidentally steal your pens. Fears include: crowds, thunder, tall angry men, tiny spaces. Just trying his best. 5’2, 100lbs BEANPOLE BOY, Leo, age 16, white (irish and scottish roots), freckles absolutely EVERYWHERE, orangey red hair thats in desperate need of a haircut, chocolate brown eyes, braces, chronic nail biter. Human and kinda wishes he wasn’t.

That’s it for now if you read all this bless u thank u here is my whole heart. Please no discourse, literally these are fictional people I’ll never publish the books they go to.

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ upd8 2020-01-17

Alright, morningblogging yesterday’s 2020-01-17 upd8 to Homestuck^2 let’s go!  Spoiler-free again.  I kinda don’t want even the next chapter names image-spoiled above the cut anymore so I’m going to have to figure out WHAT to put above the cut in these liveblog posts for visual reinforcement... a unique silly icon?  Going back once I’m done with the upd8 and posting something non-spoilery but weird-looking out of context?

Eh, can’t be assed.  Just know that after this I’m going to pony up for the Patreon commentary and skim it for anything plot-useful to y’all (in a separate post).  Let’s get started.

Okay, what’s next:  Any bonuses?  Oh, none!  Phew.  Unless those are coming faster too and just staggered differently, which would mean I gotta overcome my irrational pre-Homestuck-reading anxiety even MORE often.  :T

No Homestuck you don’t GET to ask how my-- ah, right.  :P

(FYI, HS^2 has been good to my emotions so far, quite a balm for the epilogues, so once I START reading I’m usually fine; but after being hurt so badly how could I possibly convince my lizard brain to trust it until it’s right in front of me?  Seriously, just hearing that the upd8 has landed messes me up a bit until I come fix it by reading w/ y’all here.)

Okay, so whose feelings?  As much as I’ve been waiting for Jade, I hope this isn’t about Jade.

> ==>

Ah fuck, we’re finally with the Pursuit Crew.  Bracing myself.  That means we get to see probably sleeping Jade ( :C ), full-swing DaveKat (approving nod), the first canon onscreen look at masculine-mode Roxy (<3), a probably pretty pissed off Kanaya (possibly either the feelings target, the one Saying How Are Your Feelings, or both), and uh... did they drag Callie along?  Or leave her back there with her meta freakout?  Probably left her back there, but... hm.

Let me turn up the brightness on this screen to sear these next pages into my retinas.  (Also, it feels odd to still be using a four-person “==>” for these, although if Jade is still asleep the numbers might fit on both ends... :c )

> ==>

I don’t think Dad is in the spacefaring business, so this is probably one of Jake’s shittier spaceship designs.

> ==>

...well that’s a touch disturbing.  Is that a Jade-occupied bed or are those just pillows?

Oh what the fresh fanfic’y heck is this command.

> i enter.

Okay that’s great.  I got a kick out of that.

JADE [in calliope red]: the prince’s power grows.

--but that’s not.  That explains the narrative command text, it’s alt!callie talking through a still conked-out Jade.  Please let her wake up between speak-throughs, please tell me you’ve learned that trick??  I already know you’re gonna pull an “oh she was asleep pretty much all of those THREE YEARS OF TRAVEL” thing on me and that’s hard fucking enough to deal with.

KARKAT: JESUS CHRIST!

He’s actually using the full curse correctly, huh?

...These commands.  Guess part of the puzzle is how much alt!Callie is being typically morbid and how much she might actually be wising up enough to get a kick out of this.

> the knight of blood falls.

DAVE: dude can you chill for like even a single fucking second DAVE: also are you ok

Has CallieJade chilled for even a single second this entire trip??  Is he asking just if Karkat’s okay or Jade too???

--yeah I’m overblowing things out of nervousness.  Just wait and see a bit, boots.

Alt!Callie has at least learned to be more of a smartass:

> karkat is characteristically appreciative of the alarm call.

Shirt trade Karkat, nice.  And uh, Jade’s dress sure is a... dress.  Hm.

(Did alt!Callie alchemize adjustments to did she just luck out to have a red-symbol’d Bec belt and accent leggings?  I’d prefer the former, because as much as it would be acceptable within Homestuck proper, using the transition between the epilogues and this new-author’d work to just HAPPEN to give her a fitting outfit without an excuse via providence is kind of lazy.)

KARKAT: OH, PARDON THE FUCK OUT OF ME FOR OVERREACTING A LITTLE WHEN MY GOOD FRIEND "POSSESSED JADE" BUSTS INTO MY RESPITEBLOCK AT 5 AM! KARKAT: NEXT TIME I’LL JUST PULL THE COVERS BACK AND LET HER CLIMB IN! JADE: i am uninterested in that scenario. KARKAT: GREAT! POSSESSED JADE ISN’T EVEN HORNY! HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?

...please let that mean he’s not used to her being possessed all the time and she wakes up sometimes.  PLEASE.

DAVE: but im pretty sure i locked that door JADE: i unlocked it with my mind. DAVE: fuck KARKAT: FANTASTIC. JADE: the prince’s powers are growing, but so are mine.

Dave, I’m pretty sure regular-ass no-Green-Sun Space powers can flip a few lock tumblers too.  (--though, I guess from context this was a Jakeship technolock.  Confirmation on the ship’s bad taste in design.  --I think I’m foggily remembering it said in the Epilogues that they took one of Jake’s ships just like Dirk did, too... man, being depressed so much by the Epilogues sure took a lot out of my ability to recall them decently.)

KARKAT: LIKE YOU DON’T FLOAT AROUND LIKE A CREEPY PIECE OF SHIT ALL DAY AS IT IS?

God DAMN IT she’s been asleep and possessed the whole fucking time.

> sleep is abandoned, coffee sought.

More obligatory DaveKat being cute, somehow only emphasized by the embarrassing glowing-with-power observer who doesn’t really get any of it.

Ah, here we go:

> the rogue is also awake.

Oh huh.  Cool!

Hero outfit, understated...  her his choice of heart-shades color-coded to stand out from Dave more to avoid further mistaken identity cases.  Works well!  (Holy shit I only JUST remembered at the end to go back and correctly gender Roxy as him, that was close. I blame the epilogues for a lack of visual reinforcement; I shouldn’t have as much trouble soon enough.  Seriously, I don’t remember ANYTHING without visual reinforcement, I think that’s why I remember so much of Homestuck proper so clearly.)

KARKAT: OH SHIT, THERE SHE IS! I DIDN’T EVEN HEAR HER FOLLOW US! ROXY: sometimes a girls just got to get her drift on i guess ROXY: it be like that

ilu roxy.

I missed Roxy so much, you guys.  I need more of him remarking on all this crazy shit if I’m gonna stay sane though all this.  (And I need more of him and AWAKE JADE kicking ass independently or together if I’m going to continue to believe there’s justice in the world.)

> ==>

We rarely saw Rose drinking anything but the rare coffee in canon, but I think Kanaya would have gotten her plenty into tea, yes.  Or at the very least, wanting the aesthetic of drinking tea with Kanaya would have gotten Rose into tea even if it never crossed Kanaya’s mind to try the stuff.

ROXY: well i mean who knows what she drinks now ROXY: dirk probs tossed the coffee machine out the space window right away ROXY: dude doesnt "believe" in "substances" > the prince is contemplated for a moment in silence.

FUCK, Dirk can see the narrative all the way out here???  No wonder alt!Callie’s forced to have possession turned on 24/7.  That’s fucking disappointing.  How the hell are we going to get any proper Jade time with THAT hanging over our heads?  She’d only be able to do anything when Dirk’s knocked out, and maybe not even THEN!

I was virtually promised more of actual non-asleep Jade getting shit done in HS^2.  Now there’s an even longer wait on it than I expected.  This sucks.

(EDIT: BOY did I misread that link line. Thinking “is contemplated” meant is sitting contemplating, when it meant "is being contemplated by everyone here". That was dumb of me.)

*clicks that next link*

Oh my goodness, Roxy joined the Bird Hair Crew.  It makes him look like a fucking asshole but I kind of love it.

KARKAT: IS THERE MILK?

I can’t believe Karkat is okay with drinking milk.  --yes, culturally Trolls are more comfortable with animal excretions than we are, but you would’ve thought years of railing against Equius would have purged any tolerance the idea of milk from his psyche.

I guess Dave introduced him to cereal, and it was all over from there.

DAVE: this is more like a castle DAVE: a castle of idk DAVE: twenty something ennui

Sounds like a relatable mood.  Especially considering Dirk probably decided to conquer reality out of almost nothing but twenty-something ennui.

Alright.  You aren’t going to turn Kanaya into an alcoholic or anything on us are you?

> the knight of time seeks a sylph...

--this is the shittiest shipboard starship aesthetic.

> ...and finds her, momentarily.

WOW that looks fucking depressed.  :(

> ==>

...okay you know what?  Never mind.  That outfit has wrapped straight back around into Trying Too Hard and is now hilarious.

DAVE: you ever feel like our whole lives are eventually gonna end up like this DAVE: just blasting through space on a sweeps long journey to ""somewhere"" chasing after or running from some vague enemy thats sometimes a god modded pet dog and sometimes your dad DAVE: without the faintest fucking idea of whats going to happen when we get there DAVE: thats a little specific but you know what i mean

Why do you think the epilogues upset us so much?  We thought we’d won free of that bullshit.

> ==>

Oh jesus christ that’s the most depressingly sad I’ve ever seen Kanaya drawn.  :C

--Karkat got you to watch Serendipity?  That’s amazing, Dave.

KANAYA: You Arent Reminding Me Of Her As I Rarely Think Of Anything Else KANAYA: I Close My Eyes And I See Her KANAYA: I Keep Them Open And I See Her

Fuck.

Y’know how little showing these two in love and actually HAPPY together we’ve seen in this entire comic and its subworks?  Despite them having spent at least a few happy years together we only saw in tiny screenclips?  And how Candy alluded super hard that they most likely couldn’t get that in this real timeline where shit’s going down?

Seriously, FUCK.  You could at least pretend to give us some hope, here.

Oh no, don’t ask for the nursery story, Dave.  Unless it turns out to be a funny one or a Rose twist on an old story or something.  Which it probably is, I should stop worrying.

> ==>

KANAYA: Oh Its A Wriggler Story About A Young Prince And The Beloved Flower He Loved And Lost DAVE: flower DAVE: like a plant KANAYA: Its A Fairytale Dave DAVE: right KANAYA: A Singular Wild Rose He Failed To Cherish When He Had Her KANAYA: And His Journey Of Discovering What She Meant To Him All Along KANAYA: Culminating In A New Quest To Find Her And Win Her Back

Dirk you PIECE OF SHIT did you rewrite the narrative of the fucking STORIES SHE TOLD CHILDREN?!??  Does the fact that alt!Callie is only in the present mean he can rewrite ANY past event we didn’t literally SEE???  FUCK you.  Seriously fuck all of this.

Please tell me she was kidding just then, or realizes there’s fucking something wrong with what she’s saying and getting angry or.

(EDIT: shoutyourporpoise replied: "Hey, idk If you picked up on this, but the 'nursery story' Rose told to the wigglers is just The Little Prince, which is maybe a BIT early for them to read, but I don't think that's a case of Dirk changing the narrative; its just Rose being Too Adult as usual." Oh, damn, I didn't even CATCH that it was that story. That makes all of this a lot more forgivable, even if pretty unforgivably leaning into the fiction that Dirk used to brainwash and kidnap her. Maybe that's exactly why it worked -- fiction, a story so blazed into the public consciousness? Hm. Thanks, shoutyourporpoise.)

KANAYA: But In A Way I Feel As If It Is the Greater Universe Trying To Tell Me Something

Mother fuck I’m even going to have to see our protagonists warped by Dirk when they’re ostensibly FULLY SHIELDED aren’t I.  There’s only so much of that I would be able to take, you know.

KANAYA: It May Simply Stem From My Longing To See Her Again And How Much Is Indicative Of Something More Sinister KANAYA: She Is A Goddess Of Light And The Only Of Her Kind We Know Is Alive After All KANAYA: Maybe Shes Wrested Dominion Of The Entire Concept In All Its Appearances Within This Frame Of Reference

Hm.  Well, it being a product of Rose’s ascension instead of Dirk’s is possibly a more charitable take, with Ultimate Rose projecting the delusion enforced on her backward, visible to past Rose’s Sight when she isn’t paying attention and thus paving the way for Dirk to paradoxically exploit that “ideal” as something Lighty and Important and “Perfect”.  I still don’t fucking like it though.

> ==>

DAVE: sorry i know you say you got your badass monster powers but kanaya you look tired as hell DAVE: not that im tryna psyche you or whatever but youre waxing poetic in the dark which i guess is maybe on brand but still

Yyyep.

DAVE: unless terezi is lurking in the vents somewhere and now that i bring that up its actually not out of the question so im kind of gonna be thinking about that one for a while

Pffff.

DAVE: youre the only person i know whos still basically the same as when i met you

--Which is kind of going to have to change, right?  She’s got some other cosmic purpose ready to change her a little more than she changed pre-human-troll-meetup, you’d think.

> ==>

Cute as hell.

> ==>

KANAYA: How Are Your Feelings

There’s the title drop.  I’d think Dave’s doing pretty well, considering?  Still fucked over by Dirk betraying and tricking Rose away who he’s been close with all his life, but.

> ==>

DAVE: except sometimes your best friend disappears and your other best friend goes into a ghost coma and your third best friend fucks off to space with your dad DAVE: the dude youve spent the last 7 years convincing yourself isnt an egomaniacal anime villain DAVE: and who isnt actually lying in wait to completely decimate your life and your emotions and shit

Ah... yeah.  A little worse than my casual list, huh?  Forgot that Jade vanishing into a possession-coma for THREE FUCKING YEARS is going to be hard on people inside the comic too, fuck.

DAVE: maybe it was naive to think that a bunch of twenty something trauma victims could run a society

I was honestly surprised they TRIED to run society at all.  Jasp even just highlighted a big reason why not in the bonuses.

DAVE: cool how earth c existed for centuries then we show up and manage to ruin society in seven fucking years

:(

Well, the trolls got THEIR lesson on why they didn’t deserve to rule over their new universe like gods; I guess some of y’all needed that lesson too?

DAVE: every serious conversation i have inevitably falls apart into riffing on a casual acquaintances ass

True.

Dammit, Dave didn’t feel like he could just be Some Guy even on Earth C.  :(

> ==>

...don’t think I’ve forgotten that nursery story, though.  I don’t want to think that it was something that ACTUALLY past happened, especially not without manipulation.  Like maybe past Rose was foreseeing the false purpose that Dirk wrote for her or the like, a cooperative misunderstanding between the two instead of Dirk or Rose literally reaching back in time.

> meanwhile...

KARKAT: WAIT, WHY THE FUCK AM I EVEN ASKING? HE’S OBVIOUSLY NOT FINE. KARKAT: ARE ANY OF US? ARE YOU? ROXY: not rly KARKAT: EXACTLY.

:(

--Oh right.  I remember that Callie and Roxy were going reasonably steady in Meat even though it was only alluded to, she didn’t freak out and stay awol or what have you.  That’s good to remember.  But it means Roxy deliberately left her behind to go on this dangerous quest, for years.  :C

KARKAT: KANAYA BARELY EVEN TALKS, CALLIOPE WON’T LEAVE THEIR CABIN, JADE JUST FLOATS AROUND LIKE A CREEPY BALLOON THAT’S MOSTLY MADE OF HAIR.

Oh, SHIT.  I should have read one line further.  They DID bring her.  Alt!Callie being here too must really FUCK with her.  ...maybe she can actually learn to accept that alternate way her life might’ve played out, though?

KARKAT: THE REALLY FUCKED UP THING IS I MIGHT BE THE MOST OKAY OUT OF ALL OF US, WHICH IS HOW YOU KNOW SHIT HAS REALLY GONE GLOBES UP.

Quite true.

ROXY: ur kinda an intense dude anybody ever tell u that KARKAT: NO.

Pff.

> ==>

KARKAT: AGAINST PRETTY MUCH ALL ODDS, AND DESPITE ME NOT DESERVING ANY OF IT, I ENDED UP GETTING PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING I WANTED. KARKAT: OVER AND OVER AGAIN. KARKAT: SOMETIMES IT ALMOST FEELS LIKE WHATEVER SLATHERING MONSTROSITY OF A COSMIC HELLBEAST THAT PUT ALL THIS SHIT INTO MOTION...ACTUALLY LIKES ME?

Well, if you want to blame Lord English for instance... we never saw Caliborn and Karkat interact much, but the parallels between the two were drawn so severely that Caliborn was basically the idealized, multiverse-threatening Ultimate Kismesis that he’d always dreamed of.  And operated against him without him even ever quite realizing it.

If a level of “respect” went from Caliborn to Karkat, too, from his Lord-Englishy vision nigh-omnipresent, then this outcome isn’t very surprising at all.

> ==>

(I don’t quite feel I get why Roxy shifted to this exasperated-Dave expression, but I get logically that he’d been waiting for Karkat to make a breakfast choice... Homestuck proper rarely pulled a “last line said corresponds to next-panel’s expression” without either leaving the conversation blank or having the NEXT lines of the conversation reinforce it, to prevent this inelegant misunderstanding.  Andrew was really damned talented in getting his point across visually, in that regard.  Just like, that careful visual intent delivery.)

Alright, I guess that’s it for this short upd8!  Meeting the pursuit crew was both more and less difficult than I expected.  Hopefully I get desensitized a bit as the characters continue to feel semi-almost-sorta-fine.

I have NO idea how this group is gonna work as a proper crew when we get to whatever weird other-players’ session this shit is going down in, though.

[theharlequinwriter]

Guided Arrow ..........part 1

Summary : Being Thea’s twin sister and also part of team arrow when you wake up in the another universe alone and no way home.

warnings : Swear words and PTSD 

word count : 2,402

Before I knew it Barry was reaching for my hand and we were falling down a building and then  well I don’t really know all I saw was white and when I woke up I was one the side of the road soaking wet and clearly not in star city anymore.

‘’Ollie!!......Speedy......BARRY!!!!.’’

No one answered.

‘’what the fuck happened?’’

Pulling my hood back I put my mask in my pocket and threw my bow over my back and started to walk sticking my thumb out every other foot. Finally reaching a nearby diner I asked for a booth and a cup of coffee while I pulled out all my gadgets trying to find Felicity’s or Barry's voice trying to find me.

‘’you look like you’re lost’’

Darting my head up I saw a man with blue eyes, black hair and oddly a trench coat.

‘’you can say I am in a way.’’

I winked at him as his very handsome friends walked over.

‘’Cas what the hell are you doing?’’

‘’Talking to miss.... I’m sorry I didn’t get your name.’’

‘’y/n Queen’’

‘Names Sam and Dean Winchester’’

The taller one with the long hair stuck out his hand towards me, grabbing his hand I could feel the caclus on his palm from oddly enough....a gun.

‘’So, Cas said you’re lost?’’

Dean asked as he shuffled into my booth.... uninvited.

‘’Yeah, I guess, the last thing I remember is reaching for flash.......my friends hand as I fell then everything went black. I woke up on the side of the road and made my way here.’’

‘’Well we can help you find your way back if you like.’

‘’YES, thank you.’’

Walking outside dean helped me into the car and we were off to their house or what they called their bunker. Once inside i made my way to their version of the quiver. Setting my arrows and hood on the couch began to scan their place. Clearly they really are brothers, not sure on Cas thou.. Possibly dean's boyfriend? not by the way dean watched my ass get into the car. Walking around I found their library full of supernatural information.

‘Where were you guys when darhk was around?’’

Dean came into the room with 4 beers. Handing one to me as Sam sat down and opened his laptop.

‘’So, let's start with your hometown or where you were last.’’

‘’Star city.’’

I watched as Sam typed it into his keyboard and his eyes going wide.

‘’uhm y/n that city doesn’t exist at least not that google knows.’’

‘'w-W-W WHAT DO YOU MEAN DOESN’T EXSIT I WAS JUST THERE!!!’’

‘’Google says nothing found for a Star city.’’

‘’MY WHOLE LIFE IS THERE, MY BROTHER, MY TWIN SISTER, MY NEPHEW! MY BESTFRIENDS MY FAMILY GOD DAMN IT!!!’’

I threw the beer onto the floor.  

‘’’listen y/n lets google your family maybe they will come up, you did say your sister in law was a hacker maybe she's hiding the results.’’

‘Okay my Sibling are Oliver and Thea Queen, my best friend is Iris West Allen, Her husband is Barry Allen.’’

Dean looked up at me  

‘’You're Brother and best friend are named after comic books?’’

‘NO?’’

Sam ran to the other room carrying back a few plastic covered comic books with the titles. GREEN ARROW and the other THE FLASH. I felt my head going dizzy and everything went black. When i came too I was lying on a couch, I could hear Sam and dean talking.

‘’Maybe she escaped the looney bin.’’

‘’maybe she hit her head harder than she thought.’’

‘’OR THE HOT CHICK IS CRAZY!’’

I made a coughing noise as I walked into the room.

‘Come sit, I'm going to blow your minds.’

We all headed in the war room and sat down.

‘’So, my name is Y/n Queen, my brother is Oliver Queen and Yes he is the Green Arrow, My sister and I are quickdraw and speedy. My Best friend is the wife of the flash, we discovered other worlds or dimensions a long time ago. I'm guessing that’s where I am in a world where I'm nothing more than words on a page.’’

Both Winchesters sat there with their mouths gaping.

‘’So, you're like a real super hero?’’

‘’I guess so, Ollie more is than me, I'm just backup.’’

‘And how did you get here?’’

‘Cisco must have breached me right as I grabbed Barry sending me flying through a breach, although this would be a far new distance for him....I'm happy i made it.’’

‘’Breach?’’

‘’’Rips or portals into other worlds.’’

‘’I need some air.’’

Dean stepped out of the room leaving me, Sam and Cas alone.

‘So, are their angels in your world?’

‘’not that im aware of cas , We have the league of shadows . My brother married their leader, We do have magic buts its really bad.’’

‘’Magics bad here too but more of like hocus pocus and hexes.’’

‘’so, no vigilantes?’’

‘’Not that I know of, I mean we are hunters if that counts.’’

‘’it’ll do.’’  

Sam smiled as dean walked into the room.

‘’can i shoot an arrow?’’

‘’Sure dean.’’

We went outside where I let dean have 2 arrows to shoot, he missed both times. Taking my aim, I shot to perfect straight into the apple Sam had placed on the car.

‘’How did you learn to do that?’’

‘’My brother, after slade …. I mean Death Stroke killed my mom, Ollie never wanted me and Thea to be unsafe again and after i busted him on being arrow and dig being spartan....Sorry Dig is my brothers right hand man. He welcomed me to the team as quickdraw due to the fact im a quick shot.’’

‘’wow.... you been through it.’’

‘’ oh, I got stories that would make your mind implode. Ive met a alien well a kryptonian .’’

‘’YOU FUCKIN MET SUPERMAN!!!!’

Dean was shouting now

‘’Well yeah but I meant his cousin Supergirl, she like my pen pal.’’

‘’ So I guess you're staying here till you can get home.’’

‘Thank you, Sam.,’’

Later that night  

Laying here in this strange bed in a whole other world completely alone.... alone, the one thing I fear was to be alone. I got up and headed for the library at least it has a good book maybe they will have a new series I can love. Stepping into the library I found Sam researching through a bunch of lore.

‘’Is he real?’’

Sam pointed at a comic with a man named Spiderman.

‘’maybe but not in my world or at least hasn’t made himself known.’’

He nodded to the chair next to him. Sliding into it he handed me a piece of candy.

‘’can't sleep?’’

‘’no im on earth 1 time’’

‘Earth 1?’

‘Well since I knew that one first that’s earth 1 , Supergirl is from earth 3 and I making this earth 4.’’

‘’thanks?’’

‘’So What do you like to do for fun here?’’

‘'Don’t really have time , the hunt never stops , I've actually been to hell , met lucifer and god oh and I Lost my soul and met Gods sister and died a thousand times , so has Dean and Cas.’

I could see the pain welling in his eyes, he was tired.

‘’Sounds likes my brother hehe Hes been through it for 5 years I thought he was dead and then poof he wasn’t, but he wasn’t ollie. He had scars and tattoo, spoke Russian and was very odd. He ended up letting his anger go and now we are happy again even for a moment, But your right lives like ours it only ends in death.’’

Sam laughed as he handed me a beer from the mini frige.

‘’Thats why we gotta go down swinging.’’

‘’Cheers to that.’

Tinking the beers together we continued to exchanged stories and advice. Sam made me feel safe like my life wasn't guns and masks and his wasn’t demons and vampires.

‘’Hi sam , Whose this.... she isnt from here.’’

I screamed as a young man with blonde air appeared out of nowhere.

‘’ y/ n this is jack.....lucifer's son.’’

‘’HOLY SHIT....i mean hi, im sorry im not used to people appearing like that unless they plan to kill me.’’

‘’I think its my fault you’re here.’'

‘’Jack what do you mean its your fault?’’

Before he answered he was gone.

‘’he does this when he is upset and feels guilty, he runs.’’

‘’poor guy.’’

‘Well he is only 5 months old.’’

‘’yeah well …..wait what?’’

‘’he aged in order to survive.’’

‘’oh...so are you completely human?’’

‘’yeah I mgiht be missing a bit of my soul here and there.’’

Sam smiled at his own remark, we headed into the library to research anything on other worlds. 3 hours and 5 cups of coffee each later neither Sam or I found anything besides that I may be stuck here forever. Sam already promised I have a home with them here and I will never be alone as long as hes around. I couldn’t help but notice how warm and safe I feel around him.  

I woke up to the feeling of someone breathing, as I opened my eyes I  found myself on sams chest cluctching a book on demi gods while sam had one arm wrapped around me and they other on a book on greek gods. We must of fallen asleep on the couch studying , he looks so happy when hes asleep like he isnt living a hard life everyday. Before I could take in anymore of the moment dean came busting into the room causing sam to jump shoving me to the floor.

‘Jacks back’

We all ran to the den where jack sat on the couch clutching his head in his hands. I walked over placing my hand on his shoulder.

‘are you okay?’’

‘im sorry’’

‘’for what....bringing me here. Ive been through worse trust me.’

He looked at me with his bloodshot eyes and buried his head into my chest hugging me tightly. He was still sobbing but at least now he knew I didn’t blame him.

‘so nothing from jack yet?’’

It has been almost 3 weeks since I arrived here , Cas has been working with jack to see if maybe he can re open the rip to send me home. I offered to ask barry and iris to help jack understand himself better, run some test and see what he can and cant handle. Then there's sam , we have gotten really close since I arrived late night studying and him teaching me how to put up warding's and devils traps. I even promised him id get the anti-possession tattoo once im home. Sitting in the den reading the local paper scanning for any sign of supernatural creatures.

‘hey y’n’’

Sam came into the room handing me a cup of coffee and sitting next to me , smiling at me god I love it when he smiles. Snapping out of my  trance I had to nod and try to catch up.

‘so jack thinks if we can find a dream walker we can send you home.’

‘’where do we find one of these dream walkers’’

‘’well that’s the thing we only knew one and shes dead but jack thinks he has a lead on another in ohio, him and dean went to check it out . Cas heard of one in California so he went out that way , that just leaves us.’’

Falling into the chair in the library I picked up a comic with the title green arrow looking at the way they drew my brother.

‘’ollie doesn’t have a beard ‘’

Sam chuckled.

‘’what?’’

‘’just how you call him ollie makes him seem like he isnt in a comic book in our world.’’

‘’this should be so odd to you I mean look what I found.’’

I held up a anime comic named supernatural starring sam and dean.

‘'that was written by god , not by a geek in a basement.’’

‘’ so whats sam / dean?’’

‘’how did you hear about that?’’

‘’im a vigilante , if I want info I get it.’’

‘’its nothing , its gross.’’

‘’so am I in one of these books or do I not matter?’’

‘’they stopped being made after dean went to hell , cas is isnt in them either..... but you matter to me ‘

Looking up sam was starring at me with a small smirk on his lips. Shaking his head I could see him searching the room in a painc.

‘’you said something about food and a movie?’

‘uhh yea set up in the tv room I got burgers and venom’’

About halfway into the movie sam got up to leave the room, wondering what was up I decide to follow him into the kitchen , sam was pacing the room on the phone.

‘’what do you mean she was a phony? , y/n is going to be heart broken.’’

‘’yeah I know dean but I do care for her ...of course id love to be with her........dean she has a family and a life....we weren't ever supposed to meet.’’

He hung up his phone turning towards me.

‘’y/n......uhm’’

Without thought I moved forward crashing my lps into his pulling him closer by is plaid collar , his fands found my hips lifting me onto my tip toes pulling me into him. Taking a step back I looked up at him feeling the blood rush to my face when dean came rushing in.

‘hey robin hood we might need your help.’’

Climbing into the impala we drove to a empty house where three bodies laid on the porch and woman with short hair came forward extending her hand.

‘’names Jody , dean here tells me your one of us.’’

Nodding I looked at dean.

‘why do you need me here?’’

‘’because this guy here says hes from star city’’

Stepping into the door, a man with his hands and feet tied laid on the floor with a bag on his head, reaching out i lifted the bag to revel cold dead eyes and a buzz cut along with the smile of the devil and his body covered in tattoos.

‘’d-d—d—d-d- dia'’

‘’hello y/n , Miss me baby doll ?’’

[satansladydoor]

Checkmate. Loki x reader

A/n : I was in the mood for writing, Might continue idk. Also Infinity war doesn't happen because fuck raisin man for hurting my baby's.

You were not a very rude person at heart, in fact you had all the mannerisms of someone born in old king and queen times, which is actually the truth. You we're an angel with demonic tendency's as your father put it, himself being a demon as well. Not that he taught you your polite ways, it was your angelic mother who did. But that was besides the point, overall you've been on earth a long time and that makes for weird encounters.

When you first joined the avengers it was after you helped them take down a horde of angry vampires, which you had lots of experience with them being an Demonic angel and whatnot. After making sure the people were safe you introduced yourself to Mr. Stark himself with a bow and a kiss of the hand, off well you supposed. He found it quite strange as well as the others, and your appearance was off as well

Unlike most superheros who had Latex suits or rad armor, You had on a simple white button down shirt, A black corset and a suspender dress. You did wear high heel boots with thigh highs, but not something you would expect to be comfortable to fight in. You of course were practically raised to wear layers and heels.

The strange thing was not your clothes, but the rest of you appearance, you looked like you just jumped out of a old fashioned cartoon, which is why you were often called Toonie. You often went like this when you were in fight mode. You had the ability to shape shift and use the ability's of other superhero's, and shape shift into anything from a beach ball to a floor. Your main weapon was a comically sized mallet and on your hips your side weapons were little shooty shooty bang bangs.

You were welcome back to the avengers hideout and after telling the group your life story, the bare bones of it anyway, they welcomed you with open arms. You could tell they were relieved when you returned to your natural state, no doubt they were off put by the strange contrast of reality and fiction

As you stayed you were more attracted to some avengers more then others, Mostly Peter and Thor. You loved peter like a mother would a child, and often found yourself lost in all the stuff he talked about.

" You mean to tell me that that man right there isn't Zelda?"

"No thats link."

" But she's not legendary, She does nothing the whole time!"

And when it comes to Thor, well it started with you trying to teach him earth mannerisms but that's a lost cause, Besides he seems to get the big picture well enough. So now it's sort of a big brother sort of thing.

But that all changed when the fire nation attacked, and by fire nation I mean the god of mischief himself. When Thor came home everything went to shit.

You were minding your own business playing chess with peter, who knew that he would inevitably lose based on your master chess skill but played anyway because last time he tried getting you to play a video game you got so angry you broke his T.v in half. Thankfully it was at the Avengers place because Aunt may would have been upset, so instead of Aunt may having to buy another Tony did, Along with a warning to never let You play video games again.

Suddenly the front door slams open and there is the god of thunder himself next to a pale gremlin. You stand up so quick that your chess pieced get knocked over and peter lets out a yelp of surprise.

"THOR!!!" You happily cry, running towards him and giving him a quick bow before jumping in his arms.

His laugh thunders (Get it?) as he gives me a bone crushing bear hug and the others come out to see what the fuss is about. They say hello to Thor before going back to what they were doing.

"Ah hello to you too little one." He says as he puts me down.

I can't help but gasp in surprise at a new addition, or should I say loss, on his face.

"Your eye! Oh its bound to get infected, come here." I say, grabbing his arm and dragging him to the couch and sitting him down near my forgotten chess game.

I quickly summon my first aid kit and pull out a spray bottle of water and wetting my handkerchief. I sit on his lap and gently take off his eye patch. As I'm cleaning the dried blood and dirt off his face, I feel the feeling of being watched and glance at the gremlin.

Thor must have noticed because he sits up, holding my back so I Don't fall backwards.

" This is my brother Loki." He introduced, and I nod and continue with the taking care of his eye.

I know who he is, I've heard what he did to New york. I Don't care about why he did it, He hurt innocent people and ruined family's. So in my mind he'll stay a gremlin.

"Loki, This is the lovely Y/N" He continues.

There it goes, The itch. Now you have to introduce yourself, Damn your old fashioned manners. You stand up and turn to the man of the hour, giving him a quick bow of your head and extending your hand for a shake.

" It's a pleasure to meet you, Thor talks very fondly of you." You shake his hand quick and then go back to your work on thor's eye.

You had thought that the whole thing with Loki was over, but you had thought wrong.

"Why are you a part of the Avengers, How could you help? Are you a nurse?" He says, and you can't help but look at that devilishly handsome face. Why do the cute ones have to always be Bad?

"No, I'm a superhero. I help out with missions." I Mumble, Focusing on thor, who seems to be asleep as you gently disinfect his eye.

" You know, I heard your story from Thor, and something doesn't add up. How did you become a superhero? What pushed you? What are you hiding?" He continues, lounging on the arm of the couch. By this time i'm almost done with all I can do for Thor's eye and I'm now looking for a glass eye I could give him.

I know what he want's, he wants something to hold against me, something to figure out. A puzzle. He want's me to lie and say For the greater good so he can figure out the truth and have it against me. Some power, now that he has nothing.

" When I was young, I fell in love with a bad guy, and I became his minion. He would dress me up like a doll and send me to do things, and when I messed up or refused he would punish me, then say he was sorry and that he loved me. He was a horrible man, one time even stealing a bunch of baby's from a hospital. When a police officer came in with a gun he threw the baby and when the officer cought it he grabbed her dropped gun and shot her. That's when I realised I had to stop him, and stop others like him." I rant, pulling out a blue eye.

By now Thor was looking at me with sadness and peter had stopped cleaning up the chess game. I glance up at Loki and I can see the pity all over his face.

I quickly stand up and give Thor the glass eye. " For when your eye feels better." I explain. I glance at Loki again before retreating to my room for a nap, where I dream of a mysterious Black Jaguar with bright green eyes

[kaywritesthings]

Bruce: Bruce was, more or less, glad to be back on Earth.  It wasn't something he anticipated every happening- in fact after becoming the Hulk on Asgard, he thought that was it for him, and he's just be this monster forever.  Being back, and being himself- almost exclusively it seemed, for all that the Hulk had disappeared.  He busied himself in some of Tony's old labs, trying to figure out something, or anything to help.   He didn't know how to exist in this world anymore, and found himself in some ways, longing for the ease of life back on Sakkar, where he was trapped but knew how to live in a way he didn't here.  Bruce found he missed her too, though he didn't really know her in the way the Hulk had.  He had no idea what had happened to the Valkyrie after he'd been sent to earth, or if she was among the deaths or disappeared.  There was no way to know either, so he bent himself to his work and tried not to think about it.

Valkyrie joined the chat

Valkyrie: She didnt understand Earth, no not really. No one had real order in this city of New York. Not that Sakkar had much law, but it had fear. People here mocked their leadership. Which to her looked weak. People were not allowed to scream at other people, for it was rude.. There was no killing either. She longed for some comfort of sorts, and found herself where that Thor god was. She still was a bit bitter towards him for her people, but she was warming up. He was not like his sister. She went into the facility, she didnt know anyone and found herself in a lab. She picked up bottles and for fun tossed them against the wall. She had rage in her, that was not welcome here on Earth. She saw someone sitting at a table. "You there." She said. "bruce is it?" She said. "Remember me? From Sakkar.. They put me in fleece fabric so you might not remember."

Bruce: Bruce had been bent over one of Tony's more intuitive flat paneled screens, flipping through diagrams and trying to deconstrcut what he knew about infinty stones as if that would be of any help without any actual stones to study.  But he felt like he had to do something.  He was startled when he heard another voice and his eyes wided when he saw who it belonged to.  "Wow.  It's you," he said and had to work hard not to try and stumble over his words.  Valkyrie was like the kind of warrior woman you read about in comic books- beautiful, strong, could kill you with a look if she wanted- and he still had a hard time believing that they existed.  "Of course I remember you," Bruce said, anxiously adjusting his glasses.  "I thought we'd lost you back on the ship.  When Thanos and his men attacked."

Valkyrie: "You did for a bit" She said and jumped on the counter. She sat there looking over his work. Those eyes were so familiar. "But I am not that easy to kill." She chuckled picking up his reasearch paper and looking it over. "What are you doing?" She asked. She set the book down, feeling sad for all she had to leave behind. "This is where you and hulk are from ?Newest York?" She said, looking at him. She had heard the hulk was afraid. She had alwasy been there to comfort him in time of uncertainty.

Bruce: Bruce did love the easy way that Valkyrie moved, taking ownership over every space she was in.  Evenif a small part of him wanted to reach out and make sure she didn't knock sensitive equipment off of the table.  He leaned around her and straightened a beaker that was in danger of falling.  "No, no, you wouldn't be," he said and choked a little, looking up into Val's eyes for a moment before looking away.  "But yes, this is where we're from.  Me, now mostly.  The Hulk won't come.  I think he's happy you're here though," Bruce said.  "From waht I can tell."

Valkyrie: She smiled and looked into bruces eyes. "Hey Hulk!" She said and waved. She put her hand on Bruce's arm. "I miss you big boy!" She said. She had taught hulk how to speak better and to read.. She had been his care taker and loved every moment with him. When he wasnt made to kill, he was playful and fun. "Give him time, he'll come around. I believe in you" she said into Bruces eyes. "Can he hear me?"

Bruce: Bruce let out a surprised laugh when Valkrie waved at him like that and ducked his head.  "I know it's weird to say, but I miss him too.  I could have used his help." He looked Valkyrie over and sighed, just a little.  "I know I don't really know you, but he does.  So well.  It feels like I know you."  He pursed his lips.  "He's not talking much, he's still...scared I think.  But I feel warmth from him.  His own kind of happiness."

Valkyrie: She smiled an lean over to kiss his cheek. Giving it to the hulk. She touched his cheek. He still felt like the hulk was here with him seeing bruce. "I'm starving." She said and jumped off the counter. "What does bruce eat?" She asked.

Bruce: Bruce flsuhed when Val kissed his cheek and felt himself stuttering over his next few words.  "I...uh...is that how it was with you two?" he asked, still trying to peice some things together.  He pushed back from the lab table.  "I can show you the kitchen, Bruce eats what most humans do.  How does pizza sound? I have some leftover."

Valkyrie: "We were close, not like that." She teased. "He isn't sexual if that's what you wonder. At least not with me. He loved me like a mother i think." She said. "But maybe... you dont see me as one?" She laughed. "Pee sha? That is food? I want to try it, it cant be that bad if you like it, right?"

Bruce: Bruce flushed brightly and laughed, then shook his head.  "No, no, I didn't mean like that," he said.  "I meant more like...romantic.  Not sexual," he said and then flushed even considering it.  "A mother?  No," Bruce said and laughed, leading the way to the kitchen. "No, deifnitely not.  You're...gorgeous and fierce and there is nothing motherly in what I'm thinking," he babbled and busied himself pulling out the pizza.  "Yes, it's bread and cheese and tomato sauce and like five different kinds of meat.  You'll like it.  I'm sure," he said handing her a slice.

Valkyrie: "Sounds interesting. Are you ok" She teased, she seemed to notice he was nervous. A rapid heart beat. "Tah tah tah, calm down my friend." She rubbed his head the way she rubbed Hulks when he was getting frustrated. "We need to think of fishes, red fish, blue fish, angel fish." She said. "Sorry it use to work on hulk." She teased. "can i help prepare the pizza?" She asked. "What calms you down, Banner, what does banner love to do?" She asked

Bruce: Bruce gave Valkyrie a slightly confused look and then swallowed hard when she started to rub his head.  "I'm calm," he said which was a very big lie.  "You're just a very beautiful woman, and they don't usually touch me.  Ever," Bruce said and smiled just a little.  "It's perpared," he said, "thats kind of the beauty of it," he said and offered her a slice.  "It's cold, but some people think it's better that way."  He smirked.  "I like..uh..science.  Equations.  Research.  I'm really kind of boring compared to my counterpart."

Valkyrie: "You arent boring. You have PhDs." She said. "And I think you are cute. I usually like women. If you want to join me with women one day, that's ok. I think it's call a threesome." She smiled and pet his cheek innocently. "I like research too."She said. "This place, this earth, its more peaceful but more dumb, minus you. Your leader, trump? Hes not so good?"

Bruce: Bruce laughed a little, looking Valkyrie over.  "Do you even know what a PhD is?" he asked, lifting an amaused eyebrow.  "I uh. Well." Bruce said, not sure what to do with that invitation.  "I've heard of them, yes," he said and binked, trying to wrap his head around that.  Natasha being involved was the first thing that came to mind and it just made him flush more.  "It's not always peaceful here.  I promise that.  And don't even get me started on that."

Valkyrie: She laughed when his cheeks were pink and not green. "Bruce." She wondered why he was so lonely. Sometimes the hulk expressed feeling lonely. She took the pizza and held it to her lips. She took  a bit and let out a hapy moan. "It taste so different, texture so soft and spices so blended! It's better tan a bug!" She said. "What do you think of piza"

Bruce: Bruce felt like Val was trying to kill him here, with her little sounds, that moan, and the way she was so open to touch him.  Most people avoided getting close to him, and he avoided getting close to them.  He smiled though and took a bite of his own pizza.  "This is pretty much earth's delicacy," he said and smirked.  "It's one of the few things I really missed from here."  He took another bite and winked at her. "How did you even make your way here?  Why did you come?"

Valkyrie: "I dont know. I just landed here. Tony brought me in. " She ate the pizza quickly and grabbed another slice. It was delicious. She licked each one of her fingers. She loved how the cheese stretched. She giggled and held up a pepporoni. "Everything on this piza is already dead, it makes it easy to digest." She said. "Did you like our space food? I think I heard you SCREAM when you ate the squidish pasta."

Bruce: "So you've met Tony," Bruce said and smirked.  "That must have been fun for you," he said and watched as Val licked her fingers, feeling that almost phantom but very real part of him that was still a man react.   "Yeah, you'll find that about earth.  We like our food to be dead when we eat it," he teased lightly.  "I uh.  I'm glad that my food doesn't wiggle at me here."

Valkyrie: "Yeah, it can be a bit of a pain when yo uhave to fight your food in your mouth." She said with a laugh. she ate anotehr slice and then some of Bruces because he looked done. She downed a coke too. "Thsi food is good." she wa suse to eating a lot with Hulk.They both put it away. "do you have a partner?" She asked. "Hulk said you might be into iron man ." She blinked. Hulk sometimes tried to tell jokes, sometimes.. But they could sound like reality.

Bruce: Bruce laughed softly and went to the bar.  "I think you're probably an alcoholic to rival Tony, but I don't think there's any harm in having some," he said, reaching out to grab a bottle and poure them both a glass.  "A partner?" He laughed when Val mentioned Tony and shook his head.  "In the lab, sure, but not like that," he said and cleared his throat awkwardly.  "I'm not really.  Attached to anyone like that."

[the-essence-of-awesomeness]

I was tagged by: The awesome @mysterious-teen-blogger my faviourite american :D 

The last 1. drink: Coca Cola 2. phone call: I had a phone call from a job I applied for 3. text message: A text from the same people I got the phone call from 4. song you listened to: I feel pretty/ unpretty. Quinn and Rachels duet from Glee 5. time you cried: Uh ages ago I don’t really remember? Actually I do it was a few months ago after things with my mum and me reached a boiling point and we had an argument which resulted in us not talking anymore. Have you ever 6. dated someone twice: No 7. kissed someone and regretted it: No 8. been cheated on: No 9. lost someone special: Yeah 10. been depressed: Oh my buddy my pal my friend ;) 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: No 3 favorite colors 12. Red 13. Black (I know it’s a shade not a colour but whatever :P ) 14. Green In the last year have you: 15. made new friends: Yeah 16. fallen out of love: No 17. laughed until you cried: Yup 18. found out someone was talking about you: No I don’t think so 19. met someone who changed you: No 20. found out who your friends are: Yeah 21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: Nope General: 22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them. I’m one of those people thats super picky about who I add. I have to have met you liked you and had like 2 conversations with you first. 23. do you have any pets: YES! I have a dog Benji. He’s a cavoodle he’s almost 7 years old and I love him more than life itself. I also have a Budgie called Oliver after Oliver Queen and I adopted him from the RSPCA. 

24. do you want to change your name: I’ve thought about it but nope my name is AWESOME 25. what did you do for your last birthday: I watched Lego batman by myself and had a party to which NOBODY came 26. what time did you wake up: 10am but if you mean what time did I get OUT of bed No comment 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Reading fanfiction 28. name something you can’t wait for: COMIC CON (I just hope I have the money to go ) 31. what are you listening to right now: Wrecking ball by Mother Mother 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Yeah there was a guy in my cohort at school called Tom 33. something that is getting on your nerves: The STUPID Australian goverment 34. most visited website: Tumblr 35. hair colour: Brown 36. long or short hair: I have short hair 39. piercings: None 40. blood type: I have no clue 41. nicknames: I used to call myself Liongirl but other than that nope 42. relationship status: Single 43. zodiac: Aries 44. pronouns: They/Them 45. favorite tv show:  Pretty Little Liars and Arrow 46. tattoos: I don’t have any but there are two I’m planning on getting. One is this quote: “I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul” and the other is  DC comics one I designed myself. 47. right or left handed: Right 48. surgery: Dude I’ve had so many I’ve lost count. I had at LEAST one a year till I was 11 and I have another one or two coming up. 49. piercing: None 50. sport: I used to play Field Hockey. What I really liked though was Handball/ four square that we would play during breaks at school it really sucks that it isn’t like an actual sport cause I was REALLY good at it and loved it so much. Uh I played a little basketball. OH and I LOVE baseball. But other than that Sport sucks. 51. vacation: New York, New York :D  52. pair of trainers: I have a pair of black vans which I love More general: 53. eating: The last thing I ate was Spag bog last night for dinner 54. drinking: Coke 55. i’m about to: Read some fanfic 56. waiting for: COMIC CON 57. want: Money to go to Comic Con, a job, the stupid goverment to do it’s job.  58. get married: Yeah one day 59. career: I want to become a PI Which is better: 60. hugs or kisses: Hugs 61. lips or eyes: eyes 62. shorter or taller: If you were shorter than me you would be TINY so taller 63. older or younger: Same age or older 64. nice arms or nice stomach: Don’t care 65. hook up or relationship: Relationship 66. troublemaker or hesitant: Both both is good Have you ever: 67. kissed a stranger: Nope 68. drank hard liquor: . Uh is Whiskey or Rum hard liquor cause they are my drinks of choice either mixed with coke or on the rocks so if they are yeah if not nope. 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: Nope 70. turned someone down: Once in like grade 7 this dude asked me out as like a joke and I said no but other than that never had the oppurtunity to 71. sex on the first date: No 72. broken someone’s heart: I don’t think so 73. had your heart broken: Romantically no by family yeah 74. been arrested: No 75. cried when someone died: Yeah 76. fallen for a friend: I sure have Do you believe in: 77. yourself: When I’m not depressed ;)  78. miracles: Yeah 79. love at first sight: I believe in meeting someone and KNOWING they will be important to you or that they will change your life but not love at first site. 80. santa claus: No 81. kiss on the first date: Yeah why not 82. angels: Yeah Other: 83. current best friend’s name: Rohan 84. eye colour: Brown 85. favorite movie: Pitch Perfect

Ill tag these awesome peeps  @politicallyobsessedscholar @feelsallovertheplace @wheretheroofdoesntleakinmyheart @autisticavenger

[messiahturtles]

82 truths (tag thing)

rules: once you’ve been tagged you’re supposed to write a post with eighty-two truths and then tag twenty-five people.

Tagged by: @jonghyoongi Thanks for tagging me ^-^

name: Eefke blood type: I have no idea… nickname(s): skwerel, Eefiepoh, skwerelsquish, gnoompie, broodje, and a lot more~ r/s: single zodiac sign: taurus pronouns: she\her favorite tv shows: the get down!!! shadowhunters, fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood, jessica jones, luke cage and more :p

long or short hair: short, as in bob length :) height: ehmm… i think about 1.70m which is average to short for dutch ppl :p do you have a crush on someone: no not really… what do you like about yourself: im creative and opinionated ^-^ right or left handed: right list of three favourite colors: bloodred, black and dark green

right now: eating: nothing~ drinking: rooibos tea i’m about to: go to bed listening to: dreamcatcher!!! (lucky strike + good night) kids: probably, but in the late future in maybe 15 years or so :) get married: again, probably. But ive never even been in a relationship so yeh… career: i dont know… i could do something sciency… but i also really like art and i maybe want to be an illustrator and/or make comics…

most recent: drink: coffee god bless phone call: I cant remember… i almost never call people, it makes me nervous. song you listened to: the get down pt2 soundtrack (cant remember which song)

have you ever: dated someone twice: no been cheated on: no kissed someone and regretted it: no lost someone special: yes been depressed: ive been down sometimes but thats not the same as actual depression, so id say no… been drunk and thrown up: nope kissed a stranger: no had glasses or contacts: yes! ever since i was 8~ i wear glasses (contacts scare me..) had sex on the first date: never had sex broken someone’s heart: nope turned someone down: no cried when someone died: yes fallen for a friend: dunno…

in the last year have you: made a new friend: yep fallen out of love: no laughed until you cried: yeah pretty often :p met someone who changed you: i dont know if its because of a person or if its just me… but i certainly changed a lot the past couple of years found out who your true friends were: honestly i only consider people im comfortable with my friends (and i dont feel that often) and that means that i really trust them. So far ive never been betrayed by someone i really trust.. found out someone was talking about you: yeah some people from my class apparently asked one of my friends if i liked or was in a relationship or whatever with some guy from the schooltrip to rome we went to (the answer: eww, just no) i honestly dont get why they didnt just ask me tho…? kissed someone on your fb list: no (im also not that active on fb)

which is better: lips or eyes: eyes, cuz i like drawing eyes hugs or kisses: hugs! shorter or taller: dont really have a preference romantic or spontaneous: romantic (i cant deal with people who are spontaneous, i like knowing what to expect) sensitive or loud: sensitive hookup or relationship: relationship troublemaker or hesitant: both have their benefits…

first: best friend: Anouk or Raziyah surgery: never had one sport i joined: eww sports just no vacation: probably when i was a baby

do you believe in: yourself: sometimes miracles: no love at first sight: nope heaven: nope, if u die ur just dead… its that simple (to me)

extras: how many people from your fb list do you know irl: most of them (but, again, im not really active on fb) do you have any pets: no, most animals scare me… do you want to change your name: nope what did you do for your last birthday: spent it at home with my family :) what time did you wake up today: 6.15 :( what were you doing last night at midnight: sleeping something you can’t wait for: finishing the get down pt2 and graduating high school last time you saw your mom: im sitting next to her :p what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: being able to work faster? Because im slow at almost everything… other than that i dont really think i want to change anything… have you ever talked to a person named tom: if so, i cant remember what’s getting on your nerves: sports, religion, condescending atheists, people with uneducated opinions, dutch literature, loud noises, middleaged straight white men on tv (usually), when people have a certain image of me in their head that doesnt add up to who i actually am, long schooldays, (dutch) people using lgbt ppl and ‘feminism’ as an excuse for their poorly concealed xenophobia/racism/islamophobia… i basically answered this as a list of things i just dislike/hate…

Im not going to tag 25 ppl… I tag: @lesbiansuga @21stcenturygay @bisexualjewishvampire @eggyrollz @pastel-lime @sseok-jin @glowingjinjin @alittlesugaystion (but only if you want to! no pressure~)

[5hfanfiction]

coming out (7/?) ⇾ camren

a/n: slight beginning authors note. after this, please be sure to check out my new story deeds of satan thats out now (cover in the media). and read authors note at the end of the story :) for my tumblr readers, please check out deeds of satan on my wattpad and this book as well @ wthbello .. thanks for reading. hope you enjoy. really emotional chapter in store for you lmaooo.

Camila|

She felt as if her heart were about to explode out of her chest. The room was so silent that you could hear a pin drop. Lauren stared at her, piercing green eyes wide in shock. Camila stared down at her lap, willing the tears to stop coming down. Looking back up, she saw Lauren stand. Her heart raced with fear as her former bandmate made her way toward the curtains.

“W-Where are you going?” Her voice shook with nervousness.

“Home,” Lauren said simply. She didn’t need to turn around to know that Camila had already gotten up. She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose and spoke again before Camila could. “I got my explanation. I want to go home now.”

Camila has never moved so fast in her life as she hurled herself in front of Lauren, blocking her from exiting the room. “So that’s it? You’re not going to forgive me?” She asked softly, the tears coming back.

Lauren laughed to herself before looking back up to Camila as her eyes turned to slits. “Did you really think telling me you were “in love with me” would fix anything? Did you think I’d suddenly feel pity and invite you back into my life?“ Cold green eyes stared back into her brown ones. Her breathing stuttered as Lauren brought her face closer to her own. "You can tell whatever stories you have up your sleeve to justify your reasoning for leaving other than you’re a selfish son of a bi-”

Lauren’s words fell from her lips as she stumbled back a little. Bringing her hand up to her cheek, she rubbed the slapped area. All she could do was stare at Camila in shock as brown eyes filled with tears.

“I’m not telling stories Lauren. I’m not trying to justify anything. All I want is for you to understand things from my side. I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything I’ve done to make you feel this way towards me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m fucking sorry! And I know an apology won’t make things better. I know me telling you my feelings wont make things better. But I’m trying. God, I’m trying so hard and you keep shutting me down. All I’ve wanted was for you to hear me-”

“I don’t want to hear you out Camila!” Lauren shook her head. “I have a girlfriend and so do you. Let the past be the past, alright? Thank you for your half assed explanation. Goodbye.”

And just like that, Lauren walked away, shoving past the nosy girls. Camila stood there with tear stained cheeks and watery brown eyes. She tried…

Lauren|

Everything was too overwhelming. She was almost positive Camila was bullshitting her back there. Probably doing anything and everything for her forgiveness. If her former bandmate was in love with her, she was sure she would have known. Same old Camila. Victimizing herself to earn sympathy. Lauren refused to fall for it.

All she needed was the comfort of her girlfriend. Walking up their apartment building stairs, she fished for her keys in her back pocket. Finding the metal objects, she swiftly opened the door and invited herself in.

She was in such a bad mood that she didn’t even notice that the lights were dimmed, or the fact that a black bra that wasn’t hers laid on the kitchen floor, and hushed whispers came from her shared bedroom with Lucy. Nothing prepared her for what she was about to walk in on.

Yawning softly to herself, Lauren kicked off her shoes outside their bedroom door before proceeding to open it. “Babe, I can’t believe you made me-”

The next few words fell from her lips, green eyes widening as she took in the two startled naked women in her bed. She felt paralyzed, as if she couldn’t move. This has to be some sort of sick prank.

“Lauren!” Lucy was the first to speak as she quickly scrambled out of bed and collecting her discarded clothing on the floor and quickly putting them on. “Its not what it looks like.”

Snapping out of her mini shock fest, Lauren shook her head in disbelief as she stared at the unknown woman in the corner of her bed covering herself with her blanket.

“What the fuck?” Was all she could muster up.

The woman sitting on her bed slowly stood up with a bed sheet wrapped around her as she made her way next to Lucy. “Babe… you said your roommate wouldn’t be here for the night.”

Lauren’s eyes widened in shock as anger coursed through her vines. “Roommate?” She repeated. “Wow Lucy, didn’t know I was your roommate now. Last time I checked, I was your girlfriend!”

The woman beside Lucy facial features visibly fell before she let out a confused laugh. “N-No. You’re Lauren right? The girl on Lucy’s lock screen. She said you’re her best friend and roomm-”

A flustered Lucy cut off the unknown woman by pulling Lauren out of the room and shutting the door behind her. “Baby, its really not what it looks-” Lucy tried to whisper but Lauren wasn’t having it.

She nearly shouted, “Its not what it looks like?! It looks like you’ve been cheating on me! You brought another woman into our, my, apartment. Slept with her in my bed and now I’m finding out she thinks you’re her girlfriend as well?! You’re full of shit! Thats why you wanted me to go to that stupid thing with Camila. So you can fuck around with your stupid fucking gorilla looking side chick!”

Lauren was sure the woman in the other room could hear everything coming out of her mouth despite  the door i between them but she didn’t give a flying fuck. Her girlfriend, someone she’s recently been giving her all to has been two-timing her.

Anger soon turned into anxiety as her breathing quickened and the space around her started to close in. She felt lightheaded as the ground looked like it was coming up toward her. Shaking her head, she pointed a finger at a quiet Lucy. “Get out,” she hissed.

Lucy’s eyes winded almost comically as she began rambling, “No babe… you don’t mean that. We can make this work. It was a stupid mistake. You’ve been depressed lately and ever want to do anything and well Kandee was just-”

Green eyes turned to slits as she faced Lucy. “Thats Kandee? Your suppose fucking childhood best friend! Thats fucking Kandee?!”

Storming past Lucy and swinging their bedroom door open, she saw the woman now known as Kandee putting her shoes on. Before she could even talk, Kandee began. “I am so sorry Lauren. I heard everything. I didn’t know you and Lucy were a thing, she had told me you were just a roommate. I’m so sorry. I’ll get out,” standing with her belongings, Kandee pointed at Lucy. “We’re done. You’re a pig.” With that, the tall dark haired woman exited their apartment.

Lauren took that as her cue to enter and begin throwing Lucy’s belongings out of the bedroom. “I want you out. Now!”

She ignored all of Lucy’s attempts to get her to stop. She was hurt. She felt betrayed. What made it worse that before her and Lucy, she was her best friend. Its one thing to get cheated on by a girlfriend, but by your best friend? Thats nearly unforgivable.

Soon Lucy stopped trying, going into help Lauren pack her things. Lauren didn’t know where Lucy was going nor did she care. All she knew was that she better be out soon or she herself would be going to jail for murder.

It was nearly 10 PM by the time Lauren had dumped all of Lucy’s belongings outside, already having called an Uber for her now ex girlfriend. Ignoring all attempts to reconcile, Lauren slammed the door in her face.

She felt numb. She wasn’t sure what hurt the most. Walking in on Lucy cheating or knowing that someone she’s known all her life could do such a thing. She really thought Lucy was the one, that she’d finally found someone who’d value her. That was all down the drain.

She didn’t know whether she should cry because she probably lost the most important person in her life up until tonight or be happy that she caught it and can move on before it’s too late.

Plopping down on her couch, she realized how empty her apartment suddenly felt. Normally Lucy would be listening to her rant about what went down with Camila and comforting her every few seconds. But she had no one now. She didn’t even have Normani anymore. She left when Dinah left.

She was alone. When realization suddenly sunk in, she went into full blown panic mode as tears fell and the room shrunk in size with each and every staggered breath she took. She didn’t know what to do.

Rushing into her room, she looked through the drawers for the inhaler she hasn’t used in months. When she came up empty handed, she started to feel dizzy. This was the worst night for this to happen.

Hurrying over the her nightstand, she pulled out her phone and clicking on the unsaved contact without a second thought. She had a feeling she was sure to regret this decision but she didn’t know who else to turn to that’s understand.

Trying to even out her breathing as the phone rang, she was more than relieved when they answered on the fourth ring. “Lauren?” They asked into the phone, obvious confusion in their tone.

“C-Can you p-please c-come over,” she stuttered, pulling her knees up to her chest as the tears came down at rapid fire speed.

She could hear rustling on the other end of the line, “What? What’s happening?”

“L-Luc-”

“Where are you?” The cut her off. “Text me the address.”

Hanging up, Lauren proceeded toward her messages and typed out her address to the best of her abilities before hitting send. She could already feel the regret seeping in but was covered by her overwhelming need to be told everything would be alright.

She waited, and waited, and waited. She almost thought she wasn’t going to show up, but when she was greeted with frantic knocks at her front door, she quickly went to open it.

“Laur, what’s the matter? I’m sorry it took so long. You typed of Memorial Ave when it’s really Memorial Street. Are you okay? Oh God. What happened Lo,” Camila’s face scrunched up as she took in her former band mates appearance.

Lauren willed herself to speak, trying to pause the overwhelming amount of mixed emotions from the nights previous events and being face to face with Camila a second time. “L-Lucy… she cheated on me. I’m sorry… I had no one else to c-call,” she got out.

Brown eyes instantly softened as she pulled her former bandmate into a tight hug. Lauren was stunned for a moment, but found herself hugging back just as tightly as her body shook from emotion. She clung to Camila for dear life, hoping she’d never let go. She felt Camila usher her over toward the couch.

She didn’t know how long she sat there and just cried, Camila running her slender fingertips through Lauren’s hair like she loves. She felt as her breathing slowed down and her eyes fell droopy before everything around her went black.

Camila|

She stared down at Lauren’s sleeping frame with a small smile. The last time they were in this position was during XFactor and it was the other way around. Shes not going to lie, it truly surprised her when Lauren had called. She was expecting a continuation of Lauren’s awful behavior from earlier that night with more cuss words thrown her way for leaving but when she heard Lauren on the other end, she knew something was wrong and dropped nearly everything to get to her. Literally. She dropped an entire plate of rice and chicken.

Camila looked up at the fancy clock Lauren had up in her living room, the time reading ten after 12. Wow… she thought herself. She had to get going. Knowing Lauren when she woke up, she’d regret ever calling Camila and yell at her to leave.

Staring down at her former bandmate for a few more moments, she then proceeded to pry her cold fingers off her hand that she’s been clutching on. As soon as she did that, Lauren shot up and stared at Camila with confusion. Rubbing her already red eyes and letting out a soft yawn, she gave Camila a look. “What are you doing?” She husked out, her normally low and husky voice huskier and lower due to tiredness and her extreme crying episode.

“I-Uh… I was gonna get going. Its getting late,” Camila explained, body tensed and on guard. Its best she got out of there before Lauren started up with her yelling match. She wasn’t in the mood to fight anymore.

Lauren frowned, “Exactly. Its not getting late though. Its already late. I insist you stay the night,” Lauren offered. Surprising both herself and Camila.

Brown eyes widened slightly before she shook her head. “I cant’ do that. I have to get goi-”

“Please Camz?”

Every bone in Camila’s body froze at the nickname she hasn’t heard in so long. She was literally frozen as she stared at Lauren with her mouth slightly parted an eyes wide open. “I… uh-”

Lauren huffed, “Look Camila, I’m really sorry for the things I said tonight but I really… really can’t be alone. Please… just stay.”

Camila felt her head nodding as everything within her went blank. Did Lauren really just…? She shook her head as she looked at Lauren. “Um, okay. I’ll stay on the couch,” she suggested.

Lauren rolled her eyes, “Stop Camila. I know how you hate couches. My bed is big enough for us both,” Lauren shrugged.

Camila discreetly pinched herself. Either she had unknowingly taken some sort of drug and was tripping literal balls or Lauren had officially lost it.

Camila laughed to herself, “I don’t know what kind of tricks you’ve got up your sleeve Lauren but I fucking came here out of the goodness of my heart when I could’ve very well told you to shove it like you’ve done to me oh so many times! You know how I feel about you now and you’re suddenly being all nice and inviting me to not only stay the night but sleep in the same bed as you? What games are you trying to play?!”

Lauren|

Lauren shook her head at herself. Camila was right. Why was she being so kind all of a sudden when she should hate Camila. Everything in her screamed hate her, but her heart boomed let her in. Her heartbeat quickened as she stood up, “Yeah you’re right. Uh maybe… maybe you should leave,” she said, changing her mind.

It was silent for a moment, both ladies knowing that they shouldn’t be in the same room any longer but their hearts suddenly yearning to be near one another.

Camila nodded softly, standing as well. “Yeah…” she awkwardly grabbed her bag and phone she had brought with her and proceeded toward the door. Turning around, she gave Lauren a small sad smile. “I’m sorry about what happened with Lucy. She messed up on a chance at an amazing girl and she was wrong for that.”

Lauren felt her cheeks heating up, the anger towards Camila from earlier that night slowly fading away. She nodded, “Thanks Camila,” just as Camila reached to open the door, Lauren called her back. “Wait, Camz!” She watched Camila turned around with both eyebrows raised. Lauren bit her lip nervously as she walked up to Camila. “I, uh. I have to try something…”

Camila gave Lauren a confused look but seconds later, plump pink lips were on her own. Lauren could feel Camila’s shock and nervousness but breathed out a small sigh of relief when she felt Camila’s lips slowly start to move against her own.

Her broken heart suddenly felt whole again as Camila’s lips moved in sync with her own. She couldn’t believe she was doing this but couldn’t be happier with her decision. Butterflies went crazy in her stomach as she brought a shaky hand up to the side of Camila’s face, using her tongue to probe at the ashy-brown-haired girls bottom lip, resisting the urge to grin when Camila almost immediately opened her mouth, giving Lauren access to explore. This was new territory for both ladies but they couldn’t deny the joy the felt as their tongues wrestled with each other in a battle for dominance, Lauren ultimately winning in the end.

When oxygen became a necessity, Lauren was the first to pull away, their foreheads falling gently against one another’s. Both of them still had their eyes closed as they struggled to catch their breathe.

Backing up slowly, Lauren looked at Camila with bright red cheeks. “I-I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me, I’m uh…” she couldn’t even finish her sentence.

Camila giggled softly, “I liked it,” she answered simply.

Lauren found a small toothless smile morphing its way onto her facial features. “Really?”

Camila nodded, “Yeah.”

It was silent between the two for a moment before Lauren spoke, “Did you mean what you said back there… about being in love with me?” She questioned.

Camila sighed loudly, looking down at her fingers she had intertwined together in the mist of their small conversation. “Yeah,” she answered. Looking back up she shrugged, “Always have been, always will be.”

It was Lauren’s turn to look down. Thought after thought ran through her brain like a flock of wild birds. It was slightly overwhelming but she found herself nodding softly.

Camila tilted her head as she stared at Lauren, deciding to add onto what she said. “I know you’ll never feel the same about me. That kiss was probably proof of it. But I do want you to know that everything I said was one hundred precent true. I am sorry. I’m so fucking sorry for leaving everyone hanging and I am in love with you and that’s one thing in my life I know will never change. No matter how much you hate me Lauren, my love for you will always be there,” Camila felt herself tear up as she wiped at her eyes. A dry laugh fell from her lips. “I know it’s probably pathetic, but when those stupid Camren rumors started, I never shut them down because some part of me always hoped that one day it’ll be true. That one day "Camren” would be a reality,“ she shook her head. "Its stupid, I know.”

Lauren was quiet for a moment before sighing. “Its not,” she mumbled.

Camila looked at Lauren with raised brows. “Did you not hear what I just said? I never shut down Camren rumors, even though I knew how much you hated them because I thought in my fucked up head that it’d be real some day,” looking up she laughed again. “God, I sound so crazy right now. I should probably start leav-”

“Camz!” Lauren shouted, shocking them both and successfully cutting Camila’s rambling off. “You’re not crazy and its not stupid,” she let out a frustrated sigh. “I don’t even know why I’m having this conversation with your or why I kissed you Camila, but I guess a part of me has always liked you as more than a bandmate. I always thought it was ridiculous because one, I was convinced you were straight and two… I don’t know. It just never occurred to me that my stupid little girl crush would be anything more than a girl crush,” she shrugged.

Camila was shocked to say the least. To hear that Lauren, Lauren that hated her, Lauren that gave her hell for the longest time actually liked her at some point. She didn’t know what to say.

Lauren ran a hand through her dark locks, “Look Camz, I forgive you,” she started. “I was a little too harsh on you. I wouldn’t blame you for leaving. I was so awful to you those last couple of months… I only cared about me and how I felt. I just… I just always blamed you for everything going wrong in our friendship. I always blamed you for making new friends, for venturing out in your music career. I guess I was… jealous. Jealous that you could walk into a room and everyone wanted to befriend you just by the amazing aura you always had surrounding you. Jealous because I felt that every new person in your life was replacing me when truth is… I allowed myself to be replaced. And I blamed you for it, and I’m so sorry for that Camila.”

By the end of that, both Lauren and Camila were crying. Camila laughed lightly to herself as she wiped her eyes. “God, when did we become such crying fucking pussies. It went from me leaving to this,” she chuckled softly along with Lauren.

It was silent for a moment before Lauren walked back up to Camila, and pulling her into a hug. Camila was still before her brain caught up with her body and hugged back. They stayed hugging for a few moments. “I’m sorry,” they mumbled at the same time, causing each other to laugh.

***

After that emotional few minutes in front of Lauren’s door, Lauren had somehow managed to convince Camila to actually spend the night and sleep in her bed. The two now laid cuddled up in Lauren’s bed, catching up on everything. Lauren nearly forgot how much she had missed Camila but this right here brought back so many memories for her. She forgot when laughed that freely last. Not even the memory of Lucy could remove the smile on her face right now.

“Hey Lauren?” Camila called out, her head rested on her chest as Lauren had an arm draped around her waist. Lauren hummed in response. “What are we?…” Camila asked shyly, toying with a lose thread on Lauren’s sweatshirt.

Lauren tensed slightly before sighing, “Whatever you want us to be.”

***

a/n: YIKES OMG! hi okokok, well for started, im really sorry for the late update! i just really havent had much motivation lately but i finally got it back and here i am, yusss!

wow, this story had come such a long way. i remember being really scared to even put this out, thinking my writing was literal shit and no one would want to read it. this is the first story ive ever written and took actual pride and joy in it. english isnt my first language but ive always loved writing so when i got such amazing feedback when i had put this originally one shot and now series story out, i was really surprised but loved it nonetheless. this story is nearly 11k reads and it’s been such a journey with only one chapter left before the sequel ive been working on, (whoop whoop) so im really excited to that.

i just wanna say thank you so much for being patient with me on this book and thanks so much for reading. let me know yalls thoughts down in the comments, dont forget to vote. thank you for reading!!

Ronny tumblr readers, thanks so much for reading as well and please make sure to check out my wattpad and add this story to your library/reading list @ wthbello .. ily all.

also, CHECK OUT MY NEW CAMREN STORY “deeds of satan” WHICH IS NOE PUBLISHED! (it’ll be out right after this chapter) please please please go show it some love and let me know if i should continue that where it is now or just leave it be.

im sorry i did not proof read at all, i’ll do that next time. so sorry for any mistakes and grammatical issues. thanks one last time for reading. ily.

ellianna, xxxxxx

[raitrolling]

charon is my favorite, can we get some deets about him?

omg im glad but i also gotta question ur taste in taste in trolls cuz charon is legitimately the worse lmao

but anYWAY if ur just looking for simple facts, check out his toyhou.se profile, but otherwise cuz i didnt know what to write deets-wise i ended up getting carried away textwalling the entire history of charon’s character so enjoy?? i guess????

charon was my first troll who i made way back in late 2010, sometime after i caught up with the comic (which iirc was the make her pay flash). at first i was like ‘lol fantrolls are a dumb idea why would you make characters if alternia no longer exists in the comic’, but then i discovered the trollslum board on mspaf and the types of really creative trolls people had come up with and now 6 years later im still stuck in fantroll hell LMAO. but charon didnt rly have much of a concept back then apart from doing the thing im sure a good 70% of people making their first fantroll did and choosing the lime green colour thats supposed to be in between sollux and nepeta, as well as wanting him to be some creepy dude who loves blood and fighting because i was still in my edgy phase back then rifp

this pic here was the oldest one i could find of him, i lost a lot of my 2010 arts when my old external harddrive corrupted, and the oekaki i used to draw him on no longer exists so i cant grab anything from there either. i cry looking at the horrid anatomy omg

so then i started rping him on mspaf (which was the first time i rly rped, apart from randomly jumping into other peoples rps on other forums when i was 10 cuz i didnt know wtf it was but i wanted to be cool and write characters too lmao) and he just kinda developed from there i guess?? since he came from a friendless background he ended up getting really attached and protective of the friends and quads he ended up making, which ended up being taken up to 11 and turning into his obsessive tendencies he has now (though i ended up retconning all his past relationships because at the state hes at now, he would never be able to move on from losing so many people and id be stuck with Yet Another Ball Of Angst OC)

the story about his lusus has been changed a couple times too, originally kitedad was just some big angry bird who was attacked by another troll so charon was seeking revenge, but then retcons happened. somewhere down the line i was like ‘yknow charon’s p full on when it comes to trying to help his friends to the point where hed definitely try to hurt them so he could keep them safe, that mustve come from somewhere’ and now we have the awful abusive/codependent mess that exists today

i think a lot of his development came from the way i kept reinterpreting his behaviour too. ive mentioned on this blog a couple times That Weird Black Butler Cosplayer I Almost Dated Back In High School, who, while im sure he meant well, said and did some real creepy shit like turning up to my house unannounced as he found out where i lived cuz we took the same bus home and had memorised the route, as well as turning up uninvited to parties (dressed as fuckign sebastian. i wish i was joking. even my 2011 ultra weeb ass thought that was embarrassing) i was going to because there was gonna be alcohol there and he thought i needed ‘protection’, and also texting me this incredibly detailed dream he had of saving me from bullies and whatnot and that just made me go HOLD ON THIS BEING PROTECTIVE OF SOMEONE THING IS ACTUALLY REALLY WEIRD so i wanted to channel that kind of creepiness into charon. also his guilt trippy tendencies and making everyone’s problems about him is the same shit people have pulled on me before so lmao.

tho that being said, ive never really intended for charon to be 100% irredeemable?? he’s really only ever been intentionally malicious to those who have hurt him or his friends, so he’s more... incredibly misguided to the most extreme degree. he knows what behaviours get what he wants, but doesn’t understand that those behaviours are harmful to others, and he’s hopelessly loyal and protective, but these traits are coloured by the fact he’s got a poor sense of boundaries and doesn’t recognise when he’s going too far. he’s an interesting character for me to write, but finding that exact balance has always been difficult and i still dont know if ive got him pinned down properly yet. i always get happy when i post something related to him and i get messages from people who are just ‘holy shit charon’, it makes me feel like ive done a good job at capturing his character lmao

he kinda came full circle in a sense, from horrible edgy disgusting creep to somewhat of a nice guy with the occasional weirdness to legitimate disgusting creep who happens to also be a nice guy?? idk unlike a lot of my trolls who have gone through a lot of development charon is one of the few who still has a lot of his core concepts, just refined greatly