#I also think he is again and again close to saying something! he tries again and again

[queensunshinee]

Time Of Our Lives || Part 16

Part 16:

Patrick heard Liana vomiting faintly and it made him jump out of bed. "Li, is everything okay?" he asked from outside the bathroom. "Everything's great, go back to sleep," she stammered, and he sighed. He went to the kitchen and filled a glass of water, entered the bathroom, and saw her sitting on the floor, holding her hair with one hand and gripping the edge of the toilet with the other, trying to steady herself.

"Hey, baby, it's okay. I got you," he mumbled, placing the glass on the sink and sitting down next to Liana, holding her hair in place and tracing gentle shapes on her shoulder. She was shaking from the effort as her free hand also moved to hold onto the toilet.

"Sorry I woke you," she mumbled after a few minutes, not moving her head out of fear of vomiting again. "Don't be silly, is it something you ate?" he asked. His eyebrows furrowed as he handed her the water. "There was only regular milk at work, I probably drank one cup of coffee too many yesterday," she mumbled, and as soon as she finished speaking, she vomited again, and they found themselves in the same position.

"Come on," after a few minutes of this, he helped her get up from the floor. Patrick spread toothpaste on her toothbrush and put it in her mouth, starting to move it side to side. Liana could cry. She felt the tears gathering at the back of her eyes, in moments like these she remembers how gentle and sensitive Patrick can be. If he only wants to, if he cares enough.

He stood in the bathroom while she showered and didn't take his eyes off her, not in a sexual way but out of genuine concern. Because at the end of the day, Patrick loves her, even if sometimes he doesn't know how to show it.

"Shall we go back to sleep?" he asked hopefully. "There's no point, I feel better and in half an hour, I would've had to get up anyway," she shrugged as he handed her a towel. "Li, maybe you should stay home today?" he asked, even though he knew the answer. "I'm on a schedule and in a few days, the construction starts, I need to get there to fix some drawings. If I'm lucky, I might be able to leave earlier," she smiled at him. "I don't know..." he tried to protest. Just ten minutes ago, she was shaking in his hands, and now he has to let her get dressed and leave the house. "I'm fine Pat, really. I'll drink tea today, and I'll be okay," she gave him a small kiss on the lips and left the bathroom, concluding the conversation.

"Then there must be a pillar here, otherwise the whole thing will collapse, and we didn't draw it in the sketch." Art heard Liana's voice from afar, like an echo. He automatically found himself walking towards her, because that's why Art came. He didn't really care about the construction schedule; as far as he was concerned, the longer this thing took, the more time he had to come and see her work. An excuse to be close without being creepy.

"Hey," he gave a small wave, keeping his distance from her conversation but letting her know he was there. "Mr. Donaldson," she mumbled, and so did the guy working with her. Art could say that nothing happens in his body when she calls him 'Mr. Donaldson'. That formality in front of people doesn't affect him at all. It doesn't send a little shiver through him. No memories surface, and he certainly doesn't imagine that one day she might be 'Mrs. Donaldson'. He could say all that, but he tries not to lie too much.

"Miss Levy," he returned a toothy smile, and she walked towards him. "Why are you here?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. "Where? On the land I bought?" he was amused. Now that she was closer, he could examine her. He wondered if he would ever get used to the fact that she needed glasses now when she worked. Or the small wrinkle that formed on the side of her mouth from the number of times she smiled and laughed. He wished it was because of him. Too many times he thinks about the number of things he could tell her that would make her laugh enough to deepen that wrinkle.

"You look... green." he mumbled after a few seconds. She was pale, even for her. "It's January, I turn green in January." she retorted. "Liana." he tried a more official tone, a bit more concerned. "I'm fine, Arthur, let it go. Can I ask a favor?" she asked, looking at him with big eyes. Making him raise an eyebrow. There are very few things Liana could ask of him that he wouldn't agree to do. She must know that by now. "Always." he said quicker than his ego was happy to hear. "Can you give me Tashi's number?" she asked and saw his surprised look. "Why? Are you trying to steal my coach for your lazy boyfriend?" he asked, feigning amusement. He didn't understand the endgame of this move. Overall, he didn't understand what Liana had to talk about with Tashi; Liana hates tennis, and from what Art knows, Tashi enjoys talking mostly about tennis. "don't call Patrick lazy, can you give it to me or not?" she didn't answer him. "Will it hurt my interests?" he asked, pulling out his phone. "I would never do that, Art." she sighed, and he sent her the number. There are very few things Art Donaldson wouldn't give to Liana Levy.

Liana waved for a second when she saw Tashi entering the café where they had agreed to meet. She couldn't help but feel tense and wondered how to calm her jittery leg. Why couldn't she just act like a normal person and be more…cool.

"Hey, Liana, what's up? Sorry if I'm late." Tashi was a bit confused. A bit was an understatement. Tashi was very confused. 'Hey, it's Liana, if you have free time, I'd really appreciate it if we could meet' was the message she received yesterday, and that's how she found herself in a café, sitting in front of the girl Art has been trying to fuck without success for God knows how long. Tashi couldn't help but wonder what Art's tennis would look like if he succeeded.

"All good. I'm early." Liana smiled. "Do you want to order something to eat?" she asked, and Tashi waved at the waiter, asking for coffee. Her energy was businesslike. Always in a hurry. Always busy. It didn't matter that she came from the rain. It didn't matter if she was cold or hot. She had no time to waste. "What's up, Liana?" Tashi asked after a few more minutes of awkward silence. "Is this about Art?" she added. "No... Art's not involved." she answered too quickly. Why did she answer so quickly? "So how can I help you?" she asked, taking a sip of the coffee that had just arrived.

"I don't have many friends here." Liana took a deep breath. She knew how it sounded. Desperate and pathetic. But she had no choice. She really didn't know who to talk to. "So... you want me to?" Tashi looked horrified for a moment. Not understanding what situation she had gotten into. "God, no." Liana's eyes widened. "Can you stop with the leg? It's driving me crazy." Tashi said. All the chaotic energy Liana was emitting didn't suit her. It almost threw her off balance.

"I'm pregnant." Liana said quietly right after she took a sip of her tea. She examined Tashi, who looked back at her. "Patrick?" Tashi asked, and Liana looked at her horrified. "Of course it's Patrick's. Whose else?!" she defended herself. "So, congratulations, I guess?" Tashi still didn't understand why she was there. Why her time was being wasted with news about her ex from years ago. If it's not Art's child, if it doesn't become Tashi's problem, why bother filling her brain with this unnecessary information.

"No. I don't want this." Liana said, and Tashi couldn't hide her surprise. "I'm Sorry, what?" she couldn't stop herself. "It was a mistake. I'm on the pill, and I really don't know how it happened. I need to stop this..." Liana mumbled. It wasn't coherent, but Tashi understood every word. "You've been together for years, Liana, I don't understand..." Tashi tried to be more sensitive. "It's just not the right time. We need more stability, and bringing a child into something like this is just not fair." she said, looking at her for a change.

"I would go alone, but I need someone to be listed as an escort," she averted her gaze as she said it. Ashamed of what she was asking from the girl in front of her, a complete stranger in her life, yet the only one she could think of. "Patrick?" Tashi asked quietly. "He doesn't know." Liana's eyes filled with tears. "Please-" she had been thinking about this monologue from the moment she found out, three days ago. "Okay" there was no need. Tashi answered immediately. "Okay, I'll go with you." she smiled the most genuine smile she had to offer.  "Thank you." they both took a sip of their drinks.  The rain outside intensified.

When Liana entered the house, Patrick was in the kitchen, and she quietly leaned on the doorframe, watching him while he wasn't looking. Thinking about what she was going to do tomorrow. Knowing it's for their own good. He wouldn't understand if she told him. He wouldn't understand, and he would want to keep it, and neither of them could raise a child right now. She knows that. She knows he will hate her no matter what she decides tomorrow. If he finds out, he will feel trapped. He will feel like she has ruined his life. Again. Little by little. Each time draining him of the last drop of joy left in him. The last drop of youth.

"Are you just staring now? Not saying hello?" he asked, amused. He had felt her gaze on him for a few minutes. "Hey," she approached him and hugged him from behind. Leaning on his shoulder and closing her eyes. "Hey, Lilo," he was confused. Not understanding the sudden closeness. The last few days had been strange, to say the least. Liana and Patrick hadn't fought even once. She hadn't been feeling well, and he mostly tried not to bother her with his presence. He was afraid of making her feel even worse than she already did, and the more he distanced himself, the closer she got. The more space he gave her, the more she sought touch.

"What are you making?" she asked quietly, not moving an inch, still with her eyes closed. "I'm pretty useless, but I called your mom, and she gave me a recipe for the soup you like," he said quietly. "You called my mom?" she asked in a half-broken voice. "You haven't been well for a few days, Lilo. I wanted to make something that would make you feel good," their gazes met.

Liana started crying, and Patrick panicked. These weren't just tears welling up in her eyes but real crying with her hands on her face. "Hey, hey, Liana. What's going on?" he gently took her hands off her face, revealing how red she had become in those seconds, how sad she was. His hug was comforting. More comforting than anything she had felt recently. "I'm such a bitch. Really," she mumbled. "Lilo, you're the kindest person I know," he chuckled above her head, tracing small shapes on her shoulder while gently rocking her, trying to soothe her in any way he could.

"I really love you. You know that, right?" she pulled away from him for a second and studied him. "Of course, I know," he replied, "I don't understand what's going on, Lil. I need you to talk to me." He was half-lost, not understanding what he did or what she did that led to this situation. "I don't say it enough, but I really love you, Patrick. More than I love most people in the world," she said again, unable to stop the tears. "I know. I really know," he replied, hugging her once more, not letting her slip away from him. "You're okay. Whatever it is, we're okay," he said, and she nodded into him.

Liana also thinks that most of the time, they are okay.

The months that passed were more of the same. Liana worked on Art's house, meeting with him once or twice a week to show him the project's progress. Every time he tried to have a conversation beyond professional matters, Liana cut him off. She owed that to Patrick. She owed it to herself and Patrick to be okay. She couldn't let herself betray him emotionally with someone who, the moment he had a hold on her emotions, her entire system would recalibrate around him again.

The calm dynamic between Liana and Patrick lasted exactly two weeks. Liana was quite sure they didn’t know how to manage without fighting to the point where she wanted to smash a plate against the wall. Sometimes they went to bed without exchanging a single word, and those were the days it was hardest for her to be near him. Those were the days she also canceled meetings with Art because Patrick made her so angry she became indifferent. And indifference leads to mistakes. She knew that. She had seen it up close.

Now, with both Art and Patrick participating in the tournament in Atlanta, Liana found herself ordering coffee and soda at the hotel bar while opening her laptop, hoping to tie up some loose ends before sitting down with Art for a few minutes tomorrow. "Hey, Liana," she heard Tashi’s voice from behind. They hadn’t been in touch since that time, when Tashi went with her. But Liana had a soft spot for the woman in front of her. She used to be so afraid of her once, trembling when exchanging more than a word with her. Today she thought she and Tashi saw each other with flaws and strengths. Sometimes Liana didn’t know what her strengths were, but she always knew Tashi’s.

"Hey," she smiled at her. "Mind if I sit for a bit while I wait for my order for Art and me?" she asked. "Is he sending you to fetch orders now?" Liana raised an eyebrow. It was uncharacteristic. "Actually, no, I saw you from afar and didn’t want his mind to be distracted." Tashi said, and Liana rolled her eyes, wanting to say something. "There’s no way I could distract him right now. Not before I finish working, nothing to talk to him about" she said, and Tashi rolled her eyes and chuckled. Liana wasn’t entirely sure if something was happening between Tashi and Art. It wasn’t her place to ask him, she wasn’t in contact with Tashi, and her parents hadn’t told her anything special as gossip as they usually did about his life. Maybe it was just friendly, and she was purely his coach, but Liana didn’t want to be in the middle of it. She wasn’t going to disrupt Art’s happiness. She was with Patrick. Most of the time, she was happy with Patrick.

"Has he ever shown you his necklace?" Tashi asked. "Excuse me?" Liana was confused. "Art, has he ever shown you his necklace?" she asked again, slower, like speaking to a child. "No, I never asked, and it’s always under his shirt," Liana shrugged as Tashi took her order. "He’s such a pussy," she shook her head from side to side, chuckling. "So dominant on the court and yet, such a coward. Unbelievable. Good to see you, send my regards to Patrick," she smiled and walked toward the exit, not giving Liana a chance to respond.

Art was terrified. He was bored, so he went down to the lobby half an hour before the time he had arranged with Liana. He was so happy he could see her in person and knowing she was also in Atlanta, that he didn’t care the only reason they were meeting was to talk about the house. But now he felt the air leave his lungs. He saw Tashi and Patrick. Holding hands. Like that. In the fucking lobby. And while Tashi didn’t owe anyone anything, Patrick owed Liana. And Art was supposed to be happy because he understood what was happening. It was Patrick. No matter how much time passed, he knew Patrick.

When he returned his gaze to where they had been sitting, after giving someone an autograph, they were gone. His heart was beating faster than usual. He felt like crying. He was supposed to be happy, but all he could think about was Liana’s face and that he was about to be someone who told her something that would make her cry. Again. He swore to himself he'd never make her cry again, but he was about to. And he hated it.

"Donaldson," she smiled at him, causing him to jump in his chair. "How did you get so startled, you were practically looking at me," she rolled her eyes, and he smiled at her. "What’s wrong?" she asked. His smile was fake. Liana hated that she could still tell if his smile was fake. "Nothing, just thoughts about the tournament." he said. "You crushed your competitor today, you’ll be fine." she rolled her eyes. "Mind if I order some wine? It’ll help me sleep." she added. He didn’t know she liked to drink wine. "Of course. I would order some too, but, you know." he replied, somewhat pleased she was allowing herself to relax a bit around him. It took her only a year.

"So, I’ll show you a few things and then let you go." she said, sipping her wine, and he nodded. "Hit me." "Question, while the computer loads." she said, and he looked at her. Liana hated how his green hoodie made the bright blue of his eyes stand out. She had never seen so many shades of blue as when she looked closely at Art Donaldson’s eyes.

"Talk to me." he leaned on his elbow, not taking his eyes off her. A little reveling in the moment. A little afraid to ruin it. A little wanting to ruin it. Because the voice in his head told him he had to tell her. Liana had to know. She deserved to know. Art deserved a chance. He would never do this to her.

"What’s the story with your necklace?" she asked, and he raised an eyebrow, quickly running a hand over the back of his neck. "There’s no story." he answered too quickly. He wanted to punch himself for it. "Arthur. Come on, what’s the deal, you didn’t wear a necklace when we were kids. Is it a gift from someone?" she asked. "Are you keeping track of my jewelry, Liana? Be careful, I might think you care about me more than you let on." he knew it would make her change the subject. He wouldn’t tell, but the blush on her cheeks and the big sip she took from her wine only made the conversation better.

"This is the final plan. They started the interior construction two days ago." she showed him a diagram on the computer, moving a bit closer to him. Close enough for her scent to hit him like a slap in the face. He wanted to dive into that closeness. To reach out. To tell her and immediately promise everything would be okay. That he would be there to pick up the pieces. He knew he could.

"I saw Patrick and Tashi earlier." he said quietly, almost in a whisper. Not taking his eyes off her. "Oh, I didn’t know they were in touch..." Liana said, not moving her eyes from the computer. "Liana," he sighed. He hoped she would understand from the previous sentence. That he wouldn’t have to say it. "What?" she looked at him and chuckled, but her smile quickly faded when she saw his expression, "Just say what you have to say, Donaldson." she said with an uncharacteristic coldness.

She knew Art too well. Every time she tried to deny it, she could precisely recognize a look he gave or a joke that no one around understood. She knew how to tell by his walking pace to a construction site if he had a good practice or if he was tired. She knew who he was at his core. And more than anything, she knew how he looked when he was about to break her heart.

"They were holding hands and then disappeared from my sight," he sighed, breathing heavily. He said it in a whisper, almost not wanting to say what had been weighing on him. "Oh." she drank all that was left of her wine in one gulp and signaled the waiter she wanted another glass, returning her gaze to the computer. "I need to finish a few things, and I believe we can wrap everything up in two months. After that, you’ll need to work with an interior designer-" "Liana." Art interrupted her and placed his hand on hers, giving it a slight squeeze. This made her move her hand to her leg.

Without realizing it, tears welled up in her eyes, and the waiter who brought her wine hurried away from the table as fast as he arrived. "Talk to me, please." he was desperate to know what was going through her mind. "It’s okay, it’s whatever," she shrugged and looked at him indifferently, letting one of her tears fall.

"Liana." he sighed. "How is it okay? He’s cheating on you." Art wanted to raise his voice. He wasn’t mad at her. He was mad at Patrick. He was mad at the circumstances. He was mad at himself. "I know what holding hands and disappearing with Tashi Duncan means for someone like Patrick, Art. Contrary to what you think, I’m not stupid." her words were almost venomous, but he knew she wasn’t lashing out at him. He knew he was the closest person right now. He was ready to take it.

"What do you think is happening here?" she asked, taking another big sip of wine. "That I’ll hear about Tashi and Patrick and go up to your room so you can fuck me until I forget all my problems?" she asked, and he almost choked on his own spit. He didn’t expect her to be so blunt. That sentence showed how long she’d been in a relationship with Patrick. He spoke through her.

"No, Liana." he sighed again. Running his hand over the back of his neck once more but this time leaving it there a little longer. "I’m content in my relationship. Shit happens." she finished the second glass in one go and closed the laptop, ready to leave. "Shit happens? How many times has it already happened, Liana?" he couldn’t believe the level of indifference. He wanted to shake her so hard that her brain would reset and go back to the beginning. To reboot her self-respect that had clearly been trampled on more than once.

"Bye Art, good luck tomorrow." she muttered and turned. This time his grip on her hand was firm above the table. She wouldn’t be able to move him. Not now. "You’re making a scene." she whispered. He couldn’t help but think about the power dynamics between them now that she was standing and he was sitting, but he was holding her. She couldn’t move as long as he was holding her. And if it were up to him, he would hold her forever.

"Look. Here." he did the only thing he could think of and pulled the pendant of the necklace over his shirt. Seeing her breath catch for a moment. "Is that...?" She couldn't find the words and automatically moved her free hand over the metal. "Yes." He whispered. His grip loosened, and he let his fingers intertwine with hers over the table without her pulling away. "Why?" She murmured, not stopping her hand from moving over the pendant, her dorm key. The key he refused to return to her time and again. Hanging around his neck. "You know why." He closed his eyes for a moment. "Why?" She asked again. Not letting go. She had to hold on to something, and he knew that if he wanted to give her a moment of peace, even if not for himself—because for himself, he would have chosen another way to tell her, to show her—that all these years, she had been his good luck charm, even from afar. Right now, she was the only one who mattered. Only succeeding in changing the way she looked at herself and what she thought she deserved. "Because I’m yours. I’ve always been only yours."

Oh my god!!! I hope it wasn't too long. I feel like so much has happened in this part, but we are finally in Atlanta. What are you thinking guys? We've got a bit more Tashi on this one. I love hearing from you, so talk to me. Thanks for still reading and commenting. It means the actual world. 

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[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

How would they react if their crush shoved them out of the way to hug their friend instead of them (ALSOOO I LOVE UR WRITING AND I LITERALLY GET SO HAPPY WHEN YOU UPDATE UR BLOG EVEN WHEN ITS NOT ABT WRITING HCS ETC AT ALL)

Aww thanks, glad you like them! I kinda imagined the reader walking past instead of shoving them but here's them being ignored when they hold their arms out for a hug!

Takemichi- He has the saddest expression on his face, he looks like somebody just died (it was his happiness). This has literally ruined his whole day. 

Mikey- Pouts, that wasn't very nice of you to just ignore him like that and no one ignores him. Immediately walks over to you to confront you about it, he wants to know why you just did that.

Draken- Frowns but shrugs and "moves on". Basically he doesn't let it show that it effects him but mentally he thinks about it all day.

Baji- Curses under his breath, he's going to go fight a bunch of guys to calm down now

Chifuyu- He looks like he's about to cry for a moment, he got his hopes up that he was going to get a hug only for you to walk straight past him. Vaguely wonders what he did wrong and decides to study more later (read manga). 

Mitsuya- He's pretty chill about it, a bit shocked at first but mostly understands that you probably just didn't want a hug in that moment and that's ok. 

Hakkai- Sighs in relief, he only did that because Yuzuha told him to (she knowd he likes you and is trying to get him to make a move already).

Pah- Frowns but assumes you just didn't see him, maybe he'll try again some other time.

Peh- He looks so sad for a moment but quickly shrugs it off. It probably doesn't mean anything right?

Smiley- His eyes snap open in surprise and his smile fades for a minute before he puts it back on. He spends the rest of the day muttering unhappily and seems to threaten more guys then usual. 

Angry- Blinks as he takes in what just happened, he's disappointed but tries not to let it bother him so much. You walking past doesn't mean you hate him or anything.

Mucho- Calls your name and asks you about it, figures the direct approach is the best way to clear things up. 

Sanzu- Says nothing but stares after you for a bit too long. Spends the rest of the day silently being annoyed, not with you though, he's annoyed with himself for hoping that would work.

Kisaki- He really didn't like that, spends a lot of time going over the scenario in his head over and over. He's trying to figure out where he went wrong and how to avoid it in the future. 

Hanma- Oh you want to play games with him? He can play games with you too! Hugs you and introduces himself as your boyfriend to your friends, all while having a very smug grin on his face.

Kazutora- "oh..." he just kinda stares blankly the rest of the day, being more quiet then usual. He's upset but tries to hide it (doesn't do a great job).

Taiju- Says your name, calling out to you. He doesn't exactly yell but he says it loudly enough that it can be mistaken as yelling. Of course he's marching over to you to ask what that was about. 

Koko- Pouts for a second before sticking his tongue out and acting like that didn't just bother him. He thinks about other ways he can win you over with later.

Inui- Shrugs and walks off, no one can actually tell if that bothered him or not. He's good at hiding his disappointment. 

Izana- Frowns and tries to convince himself that he didn't want a hug anyway. Watches you very closely though, if you offer anyone else a hug then he's going to get a bit jealous. This also makes him want a hug even more, he plans to get one eventually. 

Kakucho- He's a bit confused, he really thought that was going to work but it didn't. Worries that he did something to upset you. 

Shion- Just stays standing there, he thinks you're coming back after you're done talking to your friend. 

Ran- Sighs before walking after you, he stops quickly to whisper to you that you owe him now before he walks away, giving you a half hearted wave and smile before he disappears round the corner.

Rindou- He's just frowning a lot, frowns the rest of the day. But quickly says nothings wrong when Ran tries to question him. 

[crystallizsch]

The First Kiss (?)

yuusha tala x jamil viper (oc x canon) word count: 800+ cw: pure angst

(awajkjfsdkjl omg some writing reveal about their relationship dynamic? 😳 ALSO THIS ENDED UP BEING LONGER THAN INTENDED AAHH and there are bound to be typos in here but uhhh anyways—)

At last, they found themselves alone, wrapped in each other's arms, savoring the calm evening air.

Yuu smiled and raised her bare hands to cup Jamil’s cheeks gently. It was rare for the prefect to have her gloves off. So Jamil’s face heated up at the touch.

“Haha. Your face is warm, Jamil.”

“Whose fault is that I wonder?”

“Couldn’t be me.”

They joked, feeling their breathy giggles against one another and realizing their lips were almost touching.

Was this… Was this finally the moment?

Sure, she was already incredibly lax with him before — being affectionately touchy with him and constantly giving him quick and casual kisses on the cheek (as she does with basically her closest friends). But they seemed to have become close in a way that was more than Yuu’s “overly friendly” nature.

So what about a kiss on the lips?

A sudden wave of uncertainty hit the magicless prefect. Her hands dejectedly slid back down Jamil’s chest as they curled into fists.

The implications of a first kiss on the lips felt a lot heavier on her than she thought.

They have both been dancing around their feelings about one another. They both knew what they felt about one another and even made a show of teasing each other for it. But neither explicitly stated what those feelings even were.

Yuu felt much more guilty in that regard, considering her more than a flagrant expression of that affection toward him. One would think she was leading him on, but that was never the case.

And she really, truly liked him but—

Jamil tightened his arms around her waist when he felt the hesitation in her body. This subtle move caused Yuu to look deep into Jamil’s eyes again. Her heart squeezed at the sight of a soft and gentle look as she looked back with a distinctly sorry expression on her face.

It was bizarre that these were once the dangerous eyes that brought her pure hatred toward him. Now that they looked so kind and genuine, they admittedly felt more dangerous. How unfair.

“…..We don’t have to, you know,” Jamil said in a low voice. It sounded vague enough that even he did not know if he was only referring to them sharing a kiss or having a relationship overall. He also tried to be reassuring, but he was aware of the slightly sad and disappointed tone he let slip in his voice.

Yuu gulped and then felt her breath hitch in her throat. It was as if Jamil had read her mind.

Damn you, she wanted to say to him. At this point, she did not know what to say. Yuu felt like she was caught in a lie and wanted to prove him wrong. But she can’t. It wasn’t that she felt anything less for him; she simply felt conflicted about finally sealing her feelings with a kiss. The prefect just wasn’t ready. She doesn’t know when she will be. And she did not want to admit that.

Meanwhile, Jamil was relatively ready to receive that kiss. Of course, he would not say that out loud. From his perspective, Yuu would have to act first if there was truly something more to their relationship. But it seems like today was still not that day.

“I’m sorry…” Yuu whispered under her breath.

Jamil did not answer. Instead, he gave a quick peck on the prefect’s nose, which caused her face to flush. She quickly buried her face on his shoulder with a shaky sigh, her hands gripping his clothing. The vice housewarden half-heartedly laughed at her reaction as he snaked his hands higher around Yuu’s back, giving her a gentle hug instead.

There were no words exchanged between them for a period of time. They simply rested in each other’s embrace.

Still, this indeterminate name to their relationship weighed heavily on both of them.

Jamil couldn’t even say that he would wait for her. Because that would be a lie. As painful as that realization may be, he knows he wouldn’t. Why would he? Yuu repeatedly expressed her homesickness anyway.

Besides, Jamil was used to it. All good things were never permanent. That was what he was telling himself at least... Somehow this time, it was getting harder and harder to convince himself that he could simply accept losing something — her specifically.

And for Yuu’s part, she was also aware of this — that she knows she’ll be leaving all of this behind one day. The prefect had her own plans for the future, and she assumed that the vice housewarden would have his own.

There was no point in committing to anything. Because if they dare even act upon their true feelings, or heavens forbid say it out loud, it will make the inevitable separation even harder.

this was the vibe when i was writing this btw hgffjhklj

[dairymistress05]

Colin: A Search For Purpose in the Wrong Places

Colin Bridgerton is both handsome and charming so why is he often grasping for his place in the world?

From the beginning there is a common thread of insecurity attached to Colins character. He seems to struggle to know exactly where he fits, to find his purpose.

So where do these insecurities come from? Well to start, he is sort of the “forgotten middle child” in a way, he is the 3rd son after which are 2 daughters. While he and Daphne seem close, as they were close as young children, now that they are older Daphne is having her debut and becoming a woman in society. All while Colin is also there but there’s no significance for him becoming an adult. Daphne is often treated like a first child as she is the first girl after 3 boys and the first to debut in the marriage mart.

First he tries to find his place in becoming a husband, in parallel to Daphne. It’s possible he feels unseen while she is emerging into adulthood. He doesn’t know where he fits but if he vows to take care of someone, he will fit in, right?!

He is intrigued and infatuated with and Wants to “rescue” Miss Thompson from her older admirers and be her saviour, this is all before he knows about her “condition”. AND when he finds out he only wishes that she had been truthful with him. “You wish to know the cruelest part of your deception? If you had simply come to me and told me of your situation, I would have married you without a second thought. That is how In Love I believe myself to be. But I see now that was all a lie.” Read — Fixer! He wants to be the Hero, to be needed.

Following this betrayal Colin is once again set adrift and begins his travels. He has also sworn off women, as he later admits to Pen and is attempting to know himself better. This interaction is very telling to his feelings towards Pen because she says “I am a woman” to which he responds with “You are Pen, you are my friend, you do not count”. — yes this seems to some as not regarding her as worthy — but actually this hints at something else entirely. It’s an effort to separate her because in his recent context “a woman” lied to him and betrayed him and Pen would surely never do to him what Marina did.

At this point it is extremely telling that Colin is beginning to find his true self. However, part of that self is directly intertwined with his connection to Pen. “If Penelope can see me this way, then surely I can too”. She is arguably his most valued and influential female relationship outside of his family. Colin here is struggling to understand himself and his place in society and to contextualise what Pen means to him. All of this at a time in his life when he is struggling to keep afloat.

He visits Marina he seems awkward and is once again reminded of his “out of placeness”. He makes an adorable olive joke (He is such a dork!) and nerds out about plants with Sir Philip. He is more interested in their conversation than he was with anything he was talking to Marina about. Furthermore, while visiting he seems surprised and almost disappointed that Marina is well. Like what did you think was going to happen? You were you going to save her from her life? Babies and all? Honestly, Marina isn’t wrong when she calls him “a boy caught up in his own fantasies.”

His visit with Marian was a wake up call hut he is still left without the purpose he was seeking.

“After all, everyone else is finding some purpose to their lives…and here I am feeding the ducks.” This leads him to his interaction with Jack and culminates in his “saving” the Featherington ladies which leaves him feeling like a hero.

In all his following interactions with Pen in the second part seem to hint at his feelings, (whether he knows it himself or not) he loves her.

“…Our relationship has taken shape so naturally over the years, one could take it for granted. (Hint at season 3)

You have been so constant and loyal Pen”. And his “Lady Crane was right about you…” He very clearly doesn’t understand his friendship with her but it is important to him.

Outside of his family, Colin doesn’t seem to have strong relationships. This becomes even more apparent when he is spending time with his “society buds”. All along while he seems to be able to navigate society with ease, he has often always been on the fringes and his relationship with those guys just exaggerates this fact. One comment made at Lady Danbury‘s ball saying “you are much much more fun this season”. It’s unclear clear if Colin ever really socialised with the “society buds” prior to the end of season 2 much at all. He likely didn’t though, because had he spent much time with them in season 1, he wouldn’t have jumped into proposing to Marina so quickly. So his comment about “never dream of courting Penelope Featherington”, a misguided last ditch effort at fitting in? Maybe!

It is Colin going away again, only for Pen not answer his letters this time that helps to highlight his feelings of isolation. Imagine, writing to the one person you most want to feel connected yo and getting nothing in return, heartbreaking. It’s not a wonder he “puts on armour”. When Penelope was answering his letters, he held onto the pieces of himself that she most appreciated. When she wasn’t answering his letters, he lost himself trying to find his identity apart from her. This resulted in him trying on a persona that no one recognised. When she tells him it’s been vexing to see him back into society if you watch his face in that moment, it’s almost like she slapped him and you can see his facade cracking for a second before he offers to help her.

Each time he was home, regardless of feeling without a purpose, he was constantly finding comfort in Pen. We see it in the way he goes to her “like a moth to a flame” at every possible opportunity. Colin has always been at ease when speaking with Pen. He appreciates her humour, he enjoys her mind and tries to make her laugh. There is even an example of this in season 2 where philosophising and Eloise is like do not encourage him (but not only does Pen enjoy encouraging him because they match wits very well) Colin also genuinely seems to be hanging on her every word. Until he was no longer afforded those words.

Finally it was those very words that led him to realise that he didn’t need to be useful in order to be loved. That by being truly himself, He. Was. Enough. All this time she had always loved him AND he had loved her, he just didn’t see it. Colin found that seeing himself the way that Pen had always seen him was how to find where he belonged.

In this way, he found his purpose. It was to love assuredly, fervently, loudly. That true love is Not about being needed, but about being Chosen by his best friend, the only one who truly saw him and loved him exactly as he always had been.

[wayfayrr]

Love like you ✧*.⚝⋆

Here's the 400 follower raffle grand prize for @wailing-whaler!! Got Sky and reader collecting rocks <3 This went a little off of the initial base, but they do definitely collect rocks together (what a geologist not going utterly obsessed with rocks? it's a miracle) But this was very fun to write!! just soft soft fluff with the soft sleepy boy himself.

[masterlist]

“I’m still sorry for dragging you into this by the way.”

“You aren’t, and you don’t need to keep apologising for something you would happily do again in a heartbeat.”

“I am - I really am, I didn’t mean to drag you here.”

“You are an awful liar.”

He drooped like a puppet cut from its strings at that, offended I bet for calling him out. Despite it being the truth, he knows as well as I do that he was bouncing from the walls when I was brought into the game, happier than I’ve ever seen anyone before in my life. And emotions are new for him, kinda. 

“No- I’m not.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Hmph.” 

“Come on, I’ve already said that I really don’t mind it, why are you still so pouty?”

“Cause I wanted to get out rather than trapping you here with me.”

Oh, that admission is new. He’s dodged the reason why he brought me here since it happened, so that makes sense more than anything… The way that he’s leaning on me is also new though, and nice despite his grumbles, which come to a halt as he snakes his arms around me and buries his head into my neck from behind with a soft sigh. 

“Look it doesn’t really matter right now, you’ve got to save zelda right? So we should really get going, gaepora asked me to help you and I really don’t want to make a bad impression.”

That got me a squeeze and a little whine, does - does he not want to save her?

“But no matter how fast I am impa is going to tell me I’m late anyway, so why does it matter… I just wanna spend time with you.”

…

How does he know that..?How does he know what will happen??? He - this is his first time going through this journey… right? But it isn’t is it, even though he’s been trying to act like it is it’s not. I’ve played through this game once already, and he can remember that. The acceptance of it is like a cold chill down my spine, Link already knows me and has been pretending that he doesn’t, half-heartedly but still pretending. Or has he? Just because he hasn’t said it outright doesn’t mean that he’s trying to hide it, maybe he just assumed I knew already. Either way, would I be bothered by him hiding it? It’s not insidious or anything, he’s just like a lovesick puppy. 

“...Love? You - are you alright? I didn’t say something wrong did I?”  

“I was just thinking… link did you know about before?”

“Before? You mean your other playthrough right?”

Well that settles that, he wasn’t trying to hide it. It was just never mentioned, no reason for it to be honest. No one on skyloft needs to know their entire life is a game which could be very easily overheard on the tiny island and sky thought that I knew he knew so why reiterate the obvious already. 

“Sure I didn’t remember completely right away but going through Faron with you here- here brought everything crashing back so quickly.”

His grip on my waist tightened for a split second before loosening, like he’s not sure if I’ll want to be held close now that he’s sharing this. It’s only made clearer by the sigh he lets out as he takes a step away from me.

“I mean I remember remembering you when I tried to get out now, it was like… like when you fell here, on skyloft that is, everything got locked away but since we met the elder kikwi, everything has come back including how felt about it all and how I fell in l-!”

“How you ‘fell in l-’, why’d you cut yourself off there link, I’d love to know what you were going to say.” 

Almost by instinct, my head turns to follow him as he’s fumbling about in his own flustered embarrassment, having said just a tiny bit more than he’d probably meant. Stopping himself mid-word so sharply you’d think he’d bit his tongue to force himself to stop, but not soon enough that I didn’t know what he meant anyway.  

I won’t lie to myself. It’s something strange to know, and honestly all of this is making way more questions than it answers. Questions that it will be pretty hard to get answers too really, for one he and I both know this is a game and yet I’m here - he’s practically a person and… and he’s said it himself. He fell in love with me. But, I don’t dislike that. I really don’t dislike that. 

“I - I fell in love with you, and how you act and all the little things you do and how you make even the smallest things seem exciting, and it’s why I wanted out so badly so that I could hold you close and tell you how much I love every part of you, from the way your hair falls, to the way you smile, how you collect things that others wouldn’t see worth in but you give them so much worth. I can’t even tell you just how much I’ve wanted to get out even if just for a second to hand you a crystal or even a cute pebble I think would bring a smile to your face - even if it meant I’d go back to being trapped in this hell afterwards.”

My face feels like it’s about to set alight, and not from being on an active volcano. He’s still rambling about what made him fall for me, and it’s only getting more and more natural, he’s getting more and more human over time. More real. As with all good things though, it has to come to an end with him looking up only to realise that he’s been going on for a good few minutes now. Ceasing up like a deer in headlights as he struggles to move his mouth again, almost reflexively licking his lips before glancing down confusedly. Better to break through the awkwardness now so that it won’t get any worse. 

“You know, I wouldn’t be against having a relationship with you…”

“- You wouldn’t - I thought that you… you’d… you’d-”

“But.”

“...b-but?”

“I think I’d like to get to know you first link.”

“Wh - What..?”

“Well, right now I haven’t spent much time with ‘you’ you, and I don’t think it’s fair for you if I’m dating you expecting to you to be exactly like the character the game had you as.”

It’s easy to tell he’s thinking about it, with the hurt but pensive look on his face from being denied something he so clearly wanted a yes to. 

“But, I think I’ve been starting to fall for you too, for who you are link. I’d like to spend some more time with you before we have anything romantic.”

He perked up at that, a lot. Which I don’t blame him for. 

“There’s plenty of time for that then, we aren’t in any rush are we?”

“But zelda-?”

“Even if we were to teleport to the end of the dungeon we’d still be too late. Why not take it slow?”

Despite his leather gauntlets his hands are still nice to hold with how he’s intertwined ours, sneaking his fingers so that they snake between mine. Pulling my hand up to rest up on his cheek, leaning into it with a gentle sigh. 

“You’ve talked about wanting rocks from Eldin to study before, how it looked like a different volcano to anything you’ve ever seen. What if we just I don't know, went off and got you as many as you could ever want of them?”

His eyes look almost pleading, begging for me just to say yes, to give him this precious time so that he can win me over to being with him romantically. And really, how could I dream of saying no? Since ending up in skyloft those few weeks ago he’s been nothing but kind, patient and caring towards me and plus even though I said I wouldn’t compare him to the character he’s come to life around, he’s still link. Still the kind-hearted hero that I fell in love with when playing the game for the very first time, who i grew to wish was real when reading comics about his journey, why shouldn’t I be a little selfish when he cares for me as much as I do for him?

“I-”

Biting down hard on his lip now, the pleading look in his eyes switching to something more akin to outright begging. Just for me to say yes. As if there were any other options available to me. 

“I think I’d love to do that with you sky, as long as you’re certain we have the time.”

No words needed to be said after that, his face lighting up like the sky at a new years celebration. I swear if you looked closely you’d be able to see the very fireworks he was initiating in his own eyes. All the while his face was graced with the softest grin I could have hoped to see. It was definitely the right thing to say. 

“So, do you have anywhere that you think would be good places to collect some?”

“You really think after all this I wouldn’t have somewhere nearby in mind?”

“It doesn’t hurt to ask though, does it?”

“Well my pride might have gotten a little bruised, but that’ll heal in time.”

“...Do you reckon a kiss could help speed up that healing?”

“...”

“Link? Are you alright?”

“Are- would you do that for me?”

“If it’ll help fix your pride then, of course… wouldn’t want an injured hero would we?”

That shut him up well and truly, not even his usual confused soft stutters could be hurt as it seemed his code bluescreened at that idea. A full reboot happening in the time it took his face to go through a multitude of different emotions, settling on a gentle, yet mildly confused, look of contentment. Kinda spelling out his answer for me, but still, I’ll wait for clear consent before doing anything more forward than a suggestion. 

“...”

“Take your time, there’s no rush on an answer.”

A nod. Clearly he doesn’t feel comfortable speaking right now, but that's more than fine. It’s not exactly like I’m not used to him being mute again, if anything it’s not an awkward silence as he leads me over to the spot he was thinking of. A small patch to the south of Eldin, littered with just so many different stones. A dream spot for any collector, so close to an active volcano to get fresh samples well as fresh as you can get without quenching the lava. 

Will they even be able to come back out with me? Link seems to think he would have been able to come out of the game, but that only dragged me in here instead. Can I even get - don't ruin this moment with that line of thinking. We can figure that out later. 

“Hey [name], mind coming over here for a moment?” 

“Hmm? Sure, it isn't an issue.”

Speaking again now is a good sign, clearly his brain - does he have one? - has finished dealing with the bombshell I dropped on it earlier. Moving over to him isn’t a bad thing to do though, with whatever he’s holding seemingly a pleasant surprise. As soon as I’m back in front of him, he takes my chin in his hand delicately tilting it upright as he stares into my eyes. Biting down on his lips as he thinks of what to say, lifting up his other hand to my eye level, like he’s comparing whatever he’s holding to them. 

“...It really is the same colour.”

“Oh, why didn’t you tell me we were doing that, I would have been looking as well.”

“No, no collect whatever you’d like for your own collection, I just… wanted to do something where I could still just um… admire your beauty really. If you don’t want this one then, I- I can just keep it instead.”

“I’ll keep it. Thank you link, but really now we've got to get you one too.”

[asleeponelmstreet]

Burnt, part 1 (A Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss story)

You are an imp with a mysterious past who recently moved in to the Hazbin Hotel. Not necessarily to be redeemed like a sinner, but you are seeking some sort of redemption. Helluva Boss characters will be heavily involved in the story in future parts, but for now... you just have your memories.

Tags: Alastor x female reader, allusions to past Blitzø x female reader, angst, PTSD, panic attacks, eventual smut, I have no idea if there is an audience for this but I wanted it so maybe someone else will like it

This is from a female reader's perspective! If people like it, I'd be happy to write a male or GN counterpart. This was initially written for just me, but I like where its going so I thought I'd share it. Also, I've already written the next two chapters but I want to rework them because I want the story to go in a slightly different direction. So I def plan on continuing this! I also posted this on AO3, but I'm not sure where it will get the most traction. I'm still figuring out this whole posting my fanfiction thing, usually it just sits on my computer.

Minors DNI!!!!

Screams filled you with terror. The rumbling roar of the fire followed, but a high-pitched ringing overpowered it. The steady sound drowning out all the other clamor distracting you from finding help.

As everything around you burned, the temperature rose. Sweat collected on the nape of your neck and dripped down your forehead, obscuring your vision. Your nostrils flooded with the smell of ash and burning flesh. The scent was so pungent, it mixed with the metallic taste of blood on your tongue from when you bit into your lips.

You ran barefoot, trying your best to avoid shards of glass and the other broken things that lay at your feet. Flames danced around you, licking at the charred ribbons. The only remnants of the tents that once surrounded you.

Your breaths came out short as you panicked. Your entire body quivered when you allowed yourself to think you may never get out. You may never find help. May never see those you loved most again.

A loud screech rang through the air, breaking through the buzzing in your ears. It was only when it ceased that you felt the raggedness in your throat. And you realized that you had been the one to create the sound.

“Where are you right now?” The heated voice whispered against your cheek was so familiar, but also different. Not quite the voice of a childhood friend or a long lost lover.

His breath against your cheek hitched. “Where are you? What’s wrong?” Panic registered in his voice. He lifted his weight off of you but tears blurred your vision so you couldn’t see him.

“Fuck. Answer me damn it. You’re really freaking me out right now.” Even without his body pinning you to the bed, you couldn’t move. It felt like something invisible was holding you down.

A sharp pain blossomed across your chest. You tried to get words out between shallow breaths, but nothing ever came.

“It’s all my fault. It’s all my fault.” Those were the last words you heard him say before it all went as black as ash.

Startled awake by a loud crashing noise, you sprang up in bed. Relief washed over you when you realized it was just another nightmare. A familiar nightmare, but a nightmare all the same.

You took in your hotel room that you had grown familiar with over the past few weeks as you collected yourself. But the sight of the red stains on your white sheets startled you, making you shove yourself out of bed and tumble to the floor.

You had just built up the nerve to stand up and investigate the bloody mess when someone slammed open your door.

“What was that sound?! Is everything okay?” It was Angel Dust, another resident at the hotel. His room was just across the hall so it made sense that he would investigate the cacophony of sounds coming from your room. But he was also quickly becoming someone you would consider a close friend, so you hoped his intrusion was a sign he cared.

“I-I fell out of bed.” You said the first thing that came to mind. Your head still foggy from sleep. Your simple response clearly did not work for the porn star whose mouth was agape as his eyes locked on your torso.

You looked down at your nightgown and saw it was soaked in blood. Deep gashes in the thin white material cut through the skin across your chest. Your mouth dropped open with a barely audible, “Oh.”

“Doll face, what happened?” Angel came up to your side and wrapped you in a side hug, attempting to comfort you without covering himself with blood in the process.

Your brain was taking its sweet time thinking of a response. Before you could get words out, two more faces peaked into your room. One belonged to Charlie Morningstar, the princess of Hell and the owner of the Hazbin Hotel where you were currently residing. The other was her girlfriend, Vaggie.

Both women looked like they had just woken up, still dressed in pajamas with their hair mussed from sleep. “We heard a noise. Is everything okay?” Vaggie asked as they tentatively let themselves into your room.

Seeing the worried looks on their faces seemed to jumpstart your brain a bit. At least enough for some semblance of words to come out of your mouth. “I’m okay, guys. I’m really okay. I must have scratched myself in my sleep, but the blood just startled me when I woke up so I fell off the bed.” Concerned looks were still plastered on all their faces. “I’m really sorry if I woke y’all up. I really need to file my claws.”

The buzz of radio static sent a shiver down your spine. Your body went stiff. You knew what that noise meant. He was near.

“What is all the commotion in here?” Alastor, the radio demon, appeared in the doorframe and welcomed himself into your room as if he was walking into a party. He twirled his microphone like a cane until he saw you in your disheveled state.

“My, my dear. What happened to you?” He said, his red eyes narrowing. His tongue darted out of the corner of his mouth, wetting his lips as his gaze rested on the blood splattered on your chest. It made your skin crawl.

“I was just telling everyone that I scratched myself in my sleep. I was just really startled when I woke up covered in blood. It’s really not a big deal.” Your skin flushed in embarrassment as you explained the story to the deer demon.

“You should use a nail file to prevent this sort of scene then.” You rolled your eyes at that comment, wondering if he had been listening in on the conversation before making his grand entrance. What a pompous tool, you thought.

“Is that it?” Charlie asked, looking at you sweetly with those huge of eyes of hers.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I just need to get cleaned up. And maybe, Nifty wouldn’t mind cleaning my bedsheets. If not, I really don’t mind doing it.”

“No way,” Vaggie said. “It’s her job. You should take a bath and we’ll send her up to take care of the bed.”

“Thanks,” you said, smiling at her. The angel could be cold towards you, but a part of you felt like the two of you could be good friends one day. It will just take some time to warm up to each other.

“Again, I’m really sorry if I woke any of you up. I used to scratch myself when I was younger but it’s been a while.” You tried to not let your mind wander to the last time this had happened in your sleep. “And there was just so much blood.”

“Nonsense!” Alastor chided. “Don’t your worry your pretty little head.” He tapped you with his microphone, tilting your chin up so he could look you in the eyes. It made you feel like a child… and made you want to sink your claws into his grey skin. “I’ve been awake for hours.” He turned on his heels and waltzed out of the room, humming an upbeat tune on his way out.

Charlie reached her hand out yours, giving it a little squeeze before she and Vaggie left too. Angel was about join them, but you stopped him.

“Wait, Angie. Don’t leave.” You said, not wanting to be alone with your thoughts quite yet.

“Sure thing, toots. What’s up?”

You tried to think of something to say, but that was when Angel’s foot brushed up against a shard of glass on the floor. “Hey, what’s this?” He followed a trail of glass to a small broken picture frame. That must have been the crash that startled you from the nightmare.

Angel picked it up and scanned his eyes over the photograph. It was an Imp couple with beaming smiles, proudly holding their baby girl. “Aw, is this baby you and your parents?”

You nodded, tight lipped and too scared to let yourself speak.

“You’re so cute! Look at that lil’ baby tail. And your mom is gorgeous. You look just like her…” he squinted a bit, “But definitely with your dad’s eyes.”

“Thank you,” you responded politely.

Angel picked at the corner of the photograph and your stomach dropped. “Wait, is there another picture behind it? Can I see?”

You grabbed the picture frame from his hands. “No,” you growled. But seeing the hurt in the spider demon’s eyes made you feel horrible. “Uh, maybe later. I’ve got to wash all this blood off, but I’ll see you at breakfast.” You followed him out the door, locking it behind him.

Once it was just you in the room, you leaned on the back of the door sinking to your knees. You let the facade break and tears rolled down your cheeks as you carefully took the second photo out of the frame. There were actually three in total. But you couldn’t bare looking at the third photograph so you just slipped out the second one without peaking at what lay behind it.

The picture featured three imp children. You, in the middle, with your arms slung around the boys on either side of you. The three of you were so close together in the image that your cheeks squished against one another’s as you all wore huge grins.

The memory almost made a small smile form on your own face beneath all the tears. You lovingly traced a finger over both of their faces, longing for a time that seemed so far away now. But then the feeling of rage bubbled up inside of you, and your bloodied claw scratched across the face of the boy with braces who stood on your right.

Shame followed and you wished you could rewind time to undo what you had just done. You ruined the last memory you had of that happy boy. Before the fire. Before everything.

A knock at your door jolted you out of your self-pity. “Open up,” Nifty said. “I’m here to clean up your mess!”

Once you scrubbed all the blood off your body and dressed for the day, you joined the rest of the hotel in the kitchen for breakfast. Almost the whole Hazbin Hotel crew had finished their meals — Angel was still picking at some fruit left on his plate — but they were still hanging around.

Well, everyone except Alastor, but he enjoyed his unique tastes in the privacy of his own room. That was a relief.

You loaded up your plate and sat next to Angel across from Charlie, who was showing Vaggie some scribbled plans for the hotel on her notepad.

“Hey Angel, I’m really sorry about how I reacted when you saw that picture. I’m not really comfortable sharing.”

He stopped his nibbling and pulled you in for a hug. A real one this time. You melted into his touch, the feeling of his soft fur against your skin. “It’s okay. I get it, babe. You’ve had a rough morning.”

Husk approached you on his way to the kitchen sink with his dishes. “Hey kid, heard you had a lil’ accident this morning. I’ve been there, especially when I first got to Hell. Wasn’t used to having to maintain these claws.”

You could tell the bartender was trying to be comforting, but it embarrassed even more. Not because someone told him about your mess, but because you were born in Hell. You had these sharp talons your whole life.

“Thanks Husk,” you said, taking a sip of the coffee you had just poured. “Honestly, I’m normally good. I just had a nightmare last night.” You were hoping the excuse would make you feel less pathetic but then Angel let out a fit of laughter.

“A nightmare? We’re in hell. Hell, you’re from hell. You’re in the nightmare, sweetheart.” Your skin grew heated and tail flicked in annoyance. You could see from the look in his eyes that he realized how insensitive it was and regretted making fun of you. Joking was just his knee-jerk reaction.

Charlie chimed in just in time before things could get really awkward. “Ya know, what might be fun?!” She bounced in her seat. “You, me, a night out on the town! I finally have someone who I can venture outside of the pride ring with!”

You shifted in your seat, not sure what to make of this. A little worried that Vaggie might be jealous, but when you looked at her she looked totally unbothered. In fact, she looked quite pleased.

“Sure, Charlie. That sounds like fun.” You looked down as you picked at the food on your plate, trying to hide your uncertainty.

“Maybe, there’s a show tonight in the greed ring!” You hesitated at the mention of your old home, but the all-imp circus was long gone and so were most of the survivors. Many dispersed, escaping to the simple farm life in the Wrath Ring or the absolute dumpster fire that is Imp city.

“Sounds good. Thank you for inviting me.”

She bounced out of her seat so quickly that she knocked over the empty plate she had pushed to the side. But she didn’t care, she was too excited. The princess was genuinely one of the bubbliest, kindest individuals you had ever met in Hell, which was shocking considering the people she ruled.

“I’ll go look up tickets and then I’ll let you know what time to be ready!” she said as she sped off with Vaggie picking up the mess the princess left in her wake.

“Is that going to make Vaggie jealous?” you whispered to Angel.

“No, it was her idea. They were brainstorming ways to cheer you up while you were getting ready,” Angel said, a bit louder than you would have liked. “I’m jealous though.”

Charlie told you to be ready at 5, so when you finished your makeup and hair a half an hour early you decided you would make yourself a snack. Back in the kitchen, you gathered some cheese and hot sauce from the fridge. Squirting a bit of the red sauce on a big chunk, you took a bite and were mid-chew of the delicious combination when the whirring sound of a radio stopped your enjoyment.

“What an odd combination, my dear.” Alastor appeared right behind you, making you nearly jump out of your skin. “Is that a normal snack for your kind?”

Something about the way he said “your kind” made you want to punch him. “No,” you said proudly. “It’s just something my best friend showed me as kid.” You almost gasped when you realized what you had just revealed to him. And that you still referred to him as your best friend. “Want some?” You offered, knowing the overlord would refuse.

“No thank you. It’s not exactly my taste.”

“You won’t know until you try it!” you said, thinking only of him. Not the radio demon standing before you. “And who are you to judge? You’re a fucking cannibal.”

“Such foul language coming from the lips of such a pretty creature,” Alastor paused, humming to himself for a moment. “You look absolutely divine tonight darling.”

You almost choked. Is he flirting? You couldn’t really tell. So many of his words were just lies to manipulate soaked in honey. But you were dressed a bit differently than you normal tonight since Charlie had told you to dress up.

You didn’t know what to say so you settled on being polite since you knew it would appease him. “Thank you, Alastor.”

“What are you all dolled up for?” He grew closer to you, his face now only a few inches away from your own. You backed up to create some space between you two but hit your back against the counter.

“Charlie and I are going to see a show.” You nervously ran your hands up and down your arms as if it was cold – even though the room was getting quite toasty.

“Oh, how wonderful. Would you two ladies want a gentleman to accompany you on your outing tonight? I just so happen to be free.”

“No,” you said. His eyebrows raised and he squinted those devious eyes at you. “No, thank you. And anyways, we’re leaving the pride ring so unfortunately you wouldn’t be able to join.” You gave an exaggerated pout as if you were actually devastated at the thought of Alastor not being able to crash your night out with Charlie.

Alastor’s smile never wavered, but you thought you could see a twinge of disappointment in his eyes. “I never learned why you moved in to this old hotel with us. Certainly a hell born imp like yourself wouldn’t think she could be redeemed.”

You wracked your brain for what to say and settled on the same censored, but true story you told Charlie weeks before when you had arrived on her doorstep. “I wanted to help. I may not be redeemable, but at least I could try and do some good.“

“Mmm-hmm.” You could tell he knew you weren’t telling the whole truth. The whole truth would be too much.

“I’ve done so many horrible things during my life in hell and I thought this might be my only opportunity to make up for it.”

Alastor’s smile grew even wider, clearly glad to get at least a little more information out of you. You hadn’t told that last part to Charlie and you honestly wondered what made you share it with him now. Before you could get too lost in your thoughts – speak of the devil’s daughter, she saved you.

“Oh, hey Al,” she said, looking surprised to see you two talking so close together. “You ready to go? I know it’s a bit earlier than I planned but I want to make sure we can beat the crowds.”

“I’m down!” you said, happy for the excuse to slip out of this oddly intimate conversation with the radio demon.

Thank you so much for reading! I thought I was done with the next part but I want to rework it to make it better. Until next time...

[em-harlsnow]

em idk if ur still doing those tiktok trend requests but my god the "can you watch my boyfriend real quick?" trend is making me SCREAM, i think you would have fun with that one! 💗

hello!!! yes i am still doing it whenever I see one I like. I love this trend, it’s so funny!

Ian may have tiktok, but he’s not very social media oriented in general. Mickey gets nervous when people post pictures of him online anyway because of the cartel, even though Ian’s like 90% sure they won’t see Carl’s twitter with 11 followers.

But then there’s a trend he sees, and he can’t not do it. He just has to try it on Mickey and if that means forcing him in front of a camera, so be it. It’s not like he’ll post it.

Mickey’s eating breakfast in the kitchen when Ian sees the trend and it’s the perfect opportunity. He clicks onto his camera app and starts recording, propping it up in front of Mickey on a candle and making sure he can see that it’s filming.

“Fuck is this?” Mickey asks with his mouth full.

Ian ignores him, instead speaking to his phone. “I need to go out for a bit, can you watch my husband?” He says, smirking, and tussles Mickey’s hair when he starts to leave.

Mickey waves his arms around, clearly confused. “Where the fuck are you going?”

“Grocery shopping, don’t turn off the camera.” Ian calls back, half way out the door.

“Is this some kind of freaky role play?” He hears Mickey yell after him, but he’s already gone.

//

Mickey’s husband is an idiot.

Once he’s gone and has neither confirmed nor denied that this is a weird role play thing, Mickey glances suspiciously at the camera.

“What the fuck?” He mutters to the empty apartment. “He’s a fucking weirdo.”

He continues eating, finishing his cereal but it’s weird being watched by Ian’s stupid phone.

“Uh… I’m eating my niece’s Froot Loops.” He tells it, holding up his spoon to show the camera. “Ian says I eat like a twelve year old, but Ian eats like a 90 year old so he can’t fucking talk.”

The phone doesn’t reply, just records him silently.

Mickey sighs, tapping his fingers in the counter. “Why’s he always got me doing shit like this?”

He makes eye contact with the camera and glares at it. “This is stupid.” Blowing out a breath, he tries to figure out what Ian wants him to do with this. As he does, he twists his ring around his finger and it gives him an idea. Slipping it off, he presents it to the camera. “See this? This is our wedding ring. We got it engraved last year. Fuck, Ian’s gonna love that I’m talking about his stupid sappy shit. Mine has IG on the inside and his has MM, because he’s soft as fuck.” Even as Mickey mocks him, there’s a shining happiness in his eyes.

Something else catches his eye, and he gets up to grab the flower bouquet on the kitchen counter, bringing it over to the phone. “Look. I got the asshole these. Blue roses. I think they’re fake or they were painted or some shit, but still.”

He sighs again, wondering what else he can show the camera. “I’m tryna find out what he got me for my birthday. I figure he must have hidden it somewhere around here but i can’t find it. Ian won’t tell me.” Mickey leans in close then, whispering at the camera. “Between you and me, I think he’s got it stashed at Lip’s house. But I got it covered, I’ll find it. I got a plan-“

The sounds of keys turning in the lock interrupts him, and he looks to the door guiltily. When Ian comes in, they grin at each other and then Ian kisses Mickey’s head.

Addressing the camera, he says, “I hope he was well behaved.” And then stops recording, watching Mickey roll his eyes.

“What was the point in that, man?”

Ian shrugs, and looks forward to watching it back.

—> send me a tiktok trend and i’ll write a fic!

-> also let me know if you want ian’s reaction to the video

[snugglyducklingbrewhouse]

we play with fire because we like the way it burns

a mob boss!nico x nurse!fem!reader au

I know this bar

Masterlist

Warnings: this is a mob au, bar, alcohol, underage drinking (Luke specifically and technically reader if her and Luke were in the same orientation group for college), a few swear words/name calling, Jack being bullied, a bet, Luke being bullied, mentions of past relationship trauma but no specifics, I think that’s it

Word count: 2.35k

A/n: I know the poll resulted in me without us, but I had this ready and writers block is kicking my butt. I also really wanted to get something out there after going awol. This is set before Luke, Lilly, and the tree. This is the bar referenced in that installment. I spent forever on this. I wanted to build the world of this au so I added more details. Enjoy!

“Are you sure it’s okay I go to the bar tonight?” You asked for what felt like the hundredth time to Luke.

He rolled his eyes. “Yes. Nico specifically asked me if you would like to come tonight.”

That was the first of you hearing that. Your eyes lit up, but you stayed still, adjusting your clothes and accessories. “Oh? He did?”

You hoped that you didn’t sound as excited as you really were.

Luke gave you a smirk. “And by the way you’re acting, I’d say you’re excited to see him.”

Your cheeks flushed as you turned around and shoved Luke playfully. “Shut up!”

“When will you just admit that you like him?” Luke was annoyed with how much you were acting like a lovesick teenager when he knew Nico felt the same way.

But Nico didn’t know that Luke knew. Jack got a little too drunk at his shared apartment with Luke and let it slip, but Luke made sure not to say that you felt the same way.

“How about when swine take to the sky?” You quipped back, knowing it would take Luke a second to figure that one out.

“Seriously?” He sassed once it clicked in his mind. “Just tell him! Or at least offer him your number. I don’t know how he still doesn’t have it.”

“So I can just be another notch in his belt? No thanks.” You deflected and looked to the floor.

Luke’s face dropped into a gentler expression. “I know the stories, but he is not this renowned player. In the year I’ve been here, I haven’t seen him take a girl home or go home with one. I obviously am not as close to him as Jack, but he does have a softer side. I just haven’t seen more than a glimpse or two.”

You looked up at your best friend with sad eyes. “I’m just a nurse. A nobody. Why would he ever go for someone like me?”

Luke sighed, wishing you could see yourself the way others do. “You are one of the most selfless people I have ever met. I mean, you basically offered to be a nurse for the mob. The mob! You have a heart of gold, and if he doesn’t see it, then someone will come around who will. But I’m telling you, shoot your shot.”

As he was talking, you looked down again and tried not to cry. You knew your self talk could be more positive, but it takes time. And after your bad luck with men in the past, you just were scared of getting hurt again.

“You say I have a heart of gold, but then why do people always leave?” You asked, sick of people leaving you when something new and shiny comes along.

Luke felt his heart breaking. He witnessed your bad past with men through college, and he wished he could do more to help.

You became his best friend and the sister he never had. As much as he definitely intimidated some guys that wanted to ask you out back in school, he knew you deserved the world. And he really hoped that could be Nico despite his reputation and job.

————————————————————————

As you walked into the bar, you felt your nerves reach an all time high. Sure, you’ve met Nico and Jack before, but you were meeting the majority of the mob. You knew that the bar was their official spot and it was mostly just members and their partners who frequented the place.

You felt like an outsider, but it only got worse as you got closer and Luke opened the door.

“You’ll be fine,” Luke said quietly as he held the door open for you and you walked past him.

You appreciated his words, but as soon as you stepped inside, you felt out of place.

Sure, Luke had said you looked perfectly fine, but that didn’t matter once you got inside.

You didn’t know what to do, so you just did your best to keep it low key and follow Luke’s lead.

Someone was already approaching the two of you, and you felt the panic rise.

“Hey Luke, is this her?”

“Yes, this is y/n, my best friend and our new nurse,” Luke introduced you.

“It’s not official,” you corrected.

“It might as well be,” Luke said. “You patched me up and looked at Jack’s hands the other day.”

“Anyway,” you said, subtly gesturing to Luke that you still didn’t know who you were talking to.

“And this is Dawson, definitely one of the friendlier faces around here,” Luke finally introduced the man in front of you.

You definitely agreed with that. While he was attractive, your heart wanted one man at the moment.

“I don’t know whether to be flattered or offended,” Dawson said, then took a sip of his beer. “Don’t just leave her standing here, get her a drink.”

“Let’s go,” Luke said, dragging you to the bar top.

“Nice meeting you,” you said as you walked away. You couldn’t help but be over polite because of your nerves.

Once you arrived at the bar with Luke, he ordered for the both of you. “Whiskey, neat. And a bubblegum cosmotini spritzer.”

The bartender whisked away. And made your drinks.

“Did you seriously order us those drinks?” You asked Luke, knowing he usually went for neither of those.

“Trust me,” he said.

“The last time you said that, I ended up needing stitches,” you reminded him.

“And you have a badass scar because of it,” he tried to lighten the conversation.

Before you could respond, the drinks were placed in front of you.

“One bubblegum cosmotini spritzer for the lady, and a whiskey neat for the gentleman,” the bartender said.

You just looked at Luke, waiting to see what he would say.

Before either of you could say anything, the bartender cracked a smile and said, “I’m just fucking with you, Luke.”

She carefully swapped the glasses around.

“Well played,” you said. “He absolutely does not like whiskey.”

“Oh, I know. Jack made him have it this one time, and Luke’s face was priceless,” she explained.

“The same thing happened in college but with someone else. It was great,” you said.

Luke was annoyed. “Are you two done?”

“Yes,” you said with a smile. “Wishing you had a different drink yet?”

Luke downed his drink. “I’m about to get something else.”

“Oh, I’m y/n, btw,” you said to the bartender.

“Luke’s best friend from college, right?” She asked.

You nodded. “Yeah.”

“He’s definitely whined about wishing you were here more than a few times,” the bartender said, continuing to frustrate Luke.

“I’m taking her away from here,” he said. “You two are mean.”

“You know I love you, Lukey,” you said, not wanting to stop messing with him.

The bartender smiled at the nickname since no one ever calls him that before being pulled to another patron.

“I regret bringing you here,” he grumbled.

“I told you, I would have been fine at home,” you said, despite actually enjoying yourself.

You both turned so your backs were against the bar top, and you scanned the crowd.

“Looking for someone?” Luke asked, knowing damn well you were looking for Nico.

“I’m just observing the crowd,” you claimed, lying through your teeth.

“Okay, sure,” Luke played along. “There’s more people to meet.”

And so, it began. Luke introduced you to pretty much everyone, just to make sure you felt comfortable around them.

It was clear as day to you that these people were a second family to Luke. And you knew your friendship was closer to one between siblings than just friends. So, you felt honored that he was willing to share this part of his life with you.

————————————————————————

At some point, Nico joined the crowd and was talking to Jack while overlooking the bar.

“Looking for someone?” Jack asked, knowing that Nico was definitely looking for you.

Luke had told Jack that you were finally ready to meet the rest of the family. Jack knew he had to keep pushing his boss’s buttons to get him to make a move.

“Just people watching,” Nico replied before taking a sip of his drink.

Jack knew that that was a partial lie, but let it slide.

Suddenly, you and one of the partners were hysterically laughing to the point where most people stopped and turned towards you, even for just a brief moment.

This intrigued Nico, and he definitely wanted to hear your laugh again.

After the laughter died down, Jack spoke up. “Are you sure you’re just people watching? Or are you really watching her?”

Nico sighed, sick of Jack’s shit. “Will you drop it?”

“Not until you make a move,” Jack said, determined to get the two of you together. “At least give her your number. It’s about damn time you manned up and gave it to her.”

Nico took another sip. “I’ll think about it.”

“Mmm hmmm,” Jack hummed, not believing his boss. “Well you better move quick, this is the third time Dawson is talking to her tonight.”

Part of what made Jack such a great second in command was his observant nature. Although, he could be clueless at times. But he knew you well enough and definitely knew the rest of the mob.

Nico clenched his jaw.

He should have known. Dawson could be such a flirt.

Maybe Nico really did need to make a move, and fast.

————————————————————————

If your heart wasn’t set on someone already, you might have thought Dawson was cute, and you might have flirted back.

But your heart belonged to someone else, despite how much you denied it to Luke. And yourself, but you had to fess up eventually.

You already noticed when Nico joined the crowd from his office Luke told you was in the back of the bar. That didn’t mean you had to go talk to him right away. The plan was to keep it low key and hope either the feelings either disappeared or he acted before you had to.

You tried really hard to focus on what Dawson was saying, you really did. But the second Nico arrived, your senses heightened and you became hyper aware of yourself.

“You’re not listening, are you?” Dawson said, finally getting your attention.

“Huh? Sorry. There’s too much noise,” you said, trying to cover for yourself.

“Ignore him,” Luke said. “His whole this is that he craves attention.”

“Hey!” Dawson was offended.

“I have to take her to talk to the boss anyway. They didn’t exactly get to know each other when she patched me up,” Luke explained, guiding you to the one man you dreaded facing because you knew you’d be about as awkward as Princess Ana meeting Hans for the first time.

————————————————————————

Jack nearly choked on his drink when he saw you and Luke walk towards him and Nico.

Nico, on the other hand, took a long sip of his drink to attempt to calm him as you walked over.

“Hey boss, Jack,” Luke said once the two of you arrived in front of Nico and Jack.

Jack nodded and uttered a “hello,” but took another sip of his drink.

Before Luke could say anything, you decided to jump in.

“We never actually officially met,” you said. “I was a little too busy patching up this guy. I’m y/n, which I know you know. But still. Nice to officially meet you.”

“Likewise,” Nico said. “Having a good night so far?”

You were caught off guard, not expecting him to ask that.

“Uh, yeah,” you said, once you recovered. “It’s nice to finally meet everyone. It’s a little overwhelming, but I’m managing.”

“I told you I could take you back home at any point,” Luke reminded you. “You don’t have to stay.”

“It’s okay,” you tried insisting. “You’re having fun. Everyone is having fun. I don’t want to step on any toes. I can just catch an Uber back or something.”

“If you want Luke to stay, I can always take you home,” Nico spoke up.

Both your and Luke’s heads whipped towards Nico. Even Jack looked shocked.

“You don’t have to,” you quickly responded. “I don’t want to impose.”

“I see these guys all the time,” he said. “This was my only drink.”

“Are you sure?” You asked, the nerves setting in more. “Like I said, I can just Uber back. I don’t wanna bother you.”

“It’s okay,” Nico insisted. “Gives us a chance to talk without these two.” He gestured towards Jack and Luke.

You hoped your cheeks didn’t flush as you spoke up. “If you insist.”

“I just need to grab my keys in back,” he said, going to go grab them.

Once he was out of earshot, Luke spoke up first. “What the fuck was that?”

“I don’t know, but you owe me $20,” Jack said.

“You bet on me?” You asked, insulted by Jack.

“Sorta?” Jack said, but it sounded more like a question.

“He bet Nico would make the first move, and I said you’d shut it down and push him away until you felt comfortable enough and finally made a move yourself,” Luke explained.

You couldn’t help but smile at Luke. “I’m glad my best friend knows me well enough to bet on that.”

You then turned to Jack.

“You, on the other hand, are an idiot,” you said.

“What did I do?” Jack said.

“What didn’t you do?” Nico spoke up as he finally rejoined the conversation. “What did I miss?”

“Jack being an idiot, so not much” you said while Jack yelled a “hey” at you.

“Love you too, dumbass.”

“You’re lucky you’re Luke’s best friend,” Jack mumbled.

“I’ll message you when I make it back to mine,” you told Luke. “I will see you in a few days for movie night. Do not drink too much.”

“One more after this, then it’s water,” Luke promised you. “Drive safe.”

You hugged him then followed Nico out the door towards his car.

You just hoped you could make it through the car ride without embarrassing yourself.

[jackhues]

ready | alex lyon

note: thank you soo much for putting up with all my delays anon- here's the fic you've been waiting for. it's here and i hope you like it <3

pairing: alex lyon x fem!reader

you adjusted the microphone and little sign, trying to make sure they were perfect for the players to just walk by and answer.

"looks good," you muttered to yourself, getting behind the camera.

as the social media manager of the red wings, you were supposed to film cool content to post on the social media pages. but you also didn't want the players to be bothered and have to go out of their way to answer questions. so you set up next to the tunnel, and they answered as they made their way out to practice.

today's question was 'what's your favourite rom-com?' it was something the fans had been asking for a little while, and you decided why not.

the players greeted you as they walked by, answering the question with a cheeky little grin.

you tried not to blush as one of the players made their way over, all dressed up in his goalie gear.

alex lyon, the goalie for the detroit red wings, and one of the sweetest people you knew. you had a little crush on him, but decided to stay away for a few reasons. your last relationship was so bad that you had to leave your hometown and move away. you couldn't stay there any longer.

and you weren't sure if you were ready for something like that again.

alex smiled at you, his former happy personality coming back. he'd gone through a breakup near the start of the year, which kind of toned him down. you and him had gotten close because of your past relationships, finding comfort in someone so similar.

"hey y/n," he grinned. if he noticed your blush, he didn't say anything. he read the question, thinking for a second, "oh, no strings attached."

"oh that's a good one!" you grinned. "wait, i gotta stop saying that."

"you tell that to everyone?" he asked, eyes twinkling under his goalie mask.

"actually, i've said it to many people," you joked right back. "you guys have good rom-com taste."

alex smiled to himself, "i don't know about the rest of them, but i've gotten some pretty good recommendations from this girl i know."

you blushed deeper, laughing to yourself. "well, i'd say she's just glad you took her recommendations."

alex shuffled his feet, almost nervously, "and what do you think she'd say to going on a date... with me? this friday?"

you froze, staring at alex like a deer in headlights.

yes, you liked him. and yes, you'd imagined going on a date with him a million times. but you'd never imagined that he'd be interested in going on a date with you. it was a wild thing to discover this early in the morning.

"you don't have to say yes," alex added quickly. "just... well you can think about it."

"i want to," you answered quickly. "say yes. i'm saying yes, i'll go on the date with you alex."

alex grinned, his smile visible under the mask. "great. that's great. i'll see you soon."

"see you," you waved, giggling as he nearly slipped in his excitement.

you turned away from the ice, smiling to yourself. maybe you were ready to be in a relationship again. as long as it was with alex.

[littlemissaddict]

So this is inspired by a video I came across on tiktok where a guys girlfriend asked him to come dance in the rain and it was so adorable watching how excited he was that I couldn’t help myself.

Also this was originally a Steve blurb but I changed my mind right before posting.

It was the very unlike Eddie giggling that alerted both Robin and Steve that something was up, we'll that and how he jumped up from the couch in the middle of the movie to run to his room. Both Robin and Steve shared an equally confused look as they could hear Eddie shuffling about in his room, the closet door opening and closing and his still excited giggles.

"Dude what?!" Steve asks as Eddie finally re-emerges from his room, still wearing the black ripped jeans but his band shirt had been switched to a white shirt tucked into said jeans with the top few buttons undone. Robin and Steve share a look at the button-up, both completely unaware that that was something Eddie owned.

"It's like something out of a movie can you believe it?" He smiles wide as he bounces on the spot.

"What is? You're gonna have to give us a bit more," Robin rolls her eyes at Eddie's complete obliviousness to their confusion.

He holds his phone out, "she messaged look" he tells them, phone shaking about too much for them to actually read, "it's raining.... come dance with me" he's practically vibrating with happiness as he pulls to phone away from them just as quick and tucking it into his jeans pocket. "Can you believe it?" He repeats again, spinning on the spot like some lovesick teenager.

"Who?" Steve asks, confused still as he doesn’t recall Eddie seeing anyone and he's sure he would've heard about it.

"His girlfriend" Robin confirms, fighting the urge to laugh at how Steve's eye comically widen in surprise, "I'll catch you up later" she adds, laughing to herself at just how oblivious her best friend could be to those around him, as she turns back to Eddie who was now fussing over where his keys were. "In the bowl by the door" she smiles with a shake of her head.

"Thanks, gotta go" he waves as he makes a beeline for the front door.

"Well that was something" Robin chuckles as Steve hums in agreement, eager to know more about this girlfriend he's heard nothing about.

It's a couple of hours before Eddie returns, and when the door opens Robin and Steve are quick to turn to him. A rather damp Eddie dramatically slides down the door to the floor when he sees them, a smile on his face that he doesn’t think could ever be wiped away, its going to be his new normal he thinks.

"That good?!" Steve asks as if Eddie's appearance is not enough to tell.

"Yeah we need details" Robin adds.

"I-I I can't even speak it was just ahhh" he shakes his head as he gets up, the past few hours replaying in his head as he feels the butterflies fluttering in his tummy again. "Amazing, insane, god it was fucking unforgettable" he says finally after shutting the door and going them in the living room again.

"Sooo," Robin encourages hoping to get something, anything from him right now, planing on living through him for a moment considering she's single af right now.

"We were under the rain, in front of the car with the lights, you know like in movies where the light just illuminates the rain and it looks to cool, so pretty," he speaks, his words fumbling as he tries to emphasise just how amazing the moment was. "We were hugging, swaying together with the stereo turned all the way up you know," he adds trying to imitate the movements, "and then we kissed and then..." his mouth running a mile a minute until he's interrupted by Robin.

"If this is going were I think your going then I'm gonna need you to stop" she holds her hand up as she says it getting a pout in response, "I know I said we need details but not those type" she explains herself to which Steve pipes up,

"I need those details," he nods, "later though" he adds after a glare from Robin.

"It's just I can't put into words the feeling, it's just taking over but I'm so, so happy" Eddie sighs, dropping onto the couch and melting into the cushions with that same face splitting grin on his face.

"Sound like your in love love" Robin teases.

"Yeah this is dangerous man" Steve agrees with a chuckle, "happy for you though man" he adds as they leave Eddie alone to bask in his post date bliss.

And fin! If anyone wants me to write up the date let me know and I just might 🤪

[eldritchqueerture]

last chapter! @lighthouseshepard

---

Arthur was quiet, when he and Noel entered the hotel room, and the door closed behind them with a gentle click. As they were traversing the building, Noel quietly informed him what he saw – or rather who he didn’t see. From the silence between them now, Arthur could guess there was no sign of John in the room as well.

He walked up to his bed and sat down with a heavy sigh.

“Look, he’ll come back. I’m sure.” Noel sat down next to him with a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m…” Arthur hesitated. “I don’t know. I’ve been thinking…”

He trailed off. He knew that line of thinking was a self-deprecating thing that Noel would be quick to deny, no matter whether it was true or not; yet he could not stop it from drilling a hole in his brain.

Noel let out a hum, encouraging him to continue.

“It’s stupid, but without sight… Maybe he thought I’d just be a burden to him,” he said quietly. “Maybe all he wanted was to be free of… Of me.”

“Arthur.” Noel shifted in a way that made Arthur imagine he was getting a better look at his face. He tried to direct his unseeing gaze towards his voice. “And what makes you think that?”

“I—I don’t know,” he stuttered, his throat suddenly tight and his eyes stinging unpleasantly. “I’m just… I can’t,” –he bit his bottom lip, curling his right hand into a fist. The left stayed unmoving on his lap. “I can’t lose him, Noel.”

Noel gently put his hand on top of Arthur’s hand, rubbing his thumb across his fingers.

“I—I lost everything when he… He took everything from me,” Arthur whispered. “My life had ended long before that, but whatever little pieces I’d managed to put back… He took it all away.” He swallowed thickly and let out a shaky breath. “But I didn’t give up. We didn’t give up. I thought we—we had something, we worked towards something and—”

As he inhaled, he felt tears spilling from his eyes. “And we built it back or, or we tried, something approaching a life, an existence out of all these broken pieces and,” –this time the inhale was definitely a sob. “And if he’s gone then I… I don’t…” He sniffed and laughed bitterly through the tears. “I don’t know what’s left.”

This realization came as a surprise to Arthur. He had always considered himself a man who knew himself; he knew where he failed – horribly, disastrously, unforgivably – but he also knew where he succeeded. He knew he was selfish and arrogant at times, stubborn, petty, and cruel, but he was also kind, determined, strong. He knew he could withstand anything this life could throw at him. He was the captain of his soul.

Yet at this moment, with darkness in place of sight and ringing silence in his head, all that seemed so very far away. He may have been the captain, but the ship was lost at sea, with no compass, no stars to guide him – just the endless expanse of cold, dark ocean in his mind. He’d been petty to spite John, stubborn to show him he wouldn’t be fucked with; he was determined for John, and kind to show John the good side of humanity; he was strong because John needed him to be. Every word he had spoken, every action he’d taken had been seen, appraised, and understood by John. He had filtered his own identity, moulded it into something John could call his own, carved out a place for him to fit in.

And now, John was gone. There was a gaping void in Arthur’s sense of self that he could not fathom how to fill, and if John was gone for good, he could not imagine ever feeling whole again.

“This hand,” he added, turning the left hand gently under Noel’s touch. “Has been his for so long… And I know it’s mine, it’s my body, but… At the same time, it’s not–anymore.”

“Arthur,” Noel spoke again under his breath. “I…”

“You don’t—have to say anything,” Arthur sniffled again, trying to compose himself, and wiped his cheeks. “I don’t expect you to understand.”

“No, but… I think I do, in a way,” he said quietly. “It makes sense that you’d need some time to adjust. Both of you.”

Arthur let out a shaky sigh and straightened his back. “Sorry for this, I just…”

“It’s okay,” Noel chuckled. “You don’t need to apologize, kid.”

Arthur nodded his head in agreement.

“Hey, but for now,” Noel said with a steeling breath. “I think you need some food in you. What do you say we wait for him down at the restaurant?”

“I guess that’s not a bad idea,” Arthur admitted. “I’m starving.”

“Atta boy. C’mon, I’ll keep an eye out.” Noel patted his shoulder and stood up. Arthur followed him, and just as they took the first steps towards the door, it opened. Noel stopped abruptly before Arthur, who heard a sharp intake of breath from the doorway.

“Oh…” John froze, his eyes travelling from Arthur to Noel. “Noel.”

Noel’s eyes roamed all over his face with open curiosity after the initial surprise passed. A bright smile appeared on his face. “John! We were just lookin’ for you, my friend.”

Arthur’s eyes were turned in John’s vague direction – slightly to the side, but John could tell he was paying him close attention. He stood next to Noel, a bit further in the room, and there were remnants of tears under his eyes.

John felt as if something had just punched him in the gut.

“John, we need to talk,” Arthur said simply. “Just… Please.”

“I agree,” John grumbled.

“Well, that’s settled then,” Noel smirked. “I’ll leave you to it. Come down to the restaurant when you’re done, I’m bettin’ neither of you has eaten today.”

He looked John in the eyes again, his smile unwavering. He winked at him as he moved towards the door, and then, he was gone.

John let out a breath, looking back at Arthur.

“Arthur, I—”

“Look, I—I’m sorry I snapped at you,” Arthur interrupted, raising his hand. “You’re—You’re finally in your own body, with your own agency and—and I should’ve given you more space.”

John blinked at him. “What?”

“I—I understand that you might… That you would want to go your separate way, or, or spend less time with… It—It’s completely natural that you wouldn’t want to—”

“Arthur, what the fuck are you talking about?” John frowned, stifling any urges that called for closeness, for touch.

“I—Is that not why you left?” Arthur looked lost, confused.

“I…” John hesitated. “You were asleep. I wanted to go outside, and I realized that I… could.”

 “And the second time?”

“The second time you told me to leave,” he snapped.

A spark of frustration grew on Arthur’s face. “So, you were just being petty, then?”

“Oh, you’re one to talk.” John crossed his arms on his chest. Somehow, it helped him contain the emotions, like if he was trapping them from getting outside with his arms.

Arthur suddenly deflated, his eyes dropping to the floor.

“I’m sorry, John. You’re right. I was… I’m being unfair,” he said. The next breath he took was shaky. “I don’t… I don’t want you to leave.”

“I don’t want to leave either,” John replied simply. Arthur apparently did not expect that, blinking in surprise, his eyebrows raising slightly. With hope?

“No?”

“Of course not,” he said thickly. “Did you expect me to just leave you here alone, as if I didn’t—”

Love you, he did not say. He swallowed through the tightness in his throat. “As if I didn’t care?”

“I—I…”

“I’m not leaving,” he repeated for good measure. Arthur exhaled shakily at that.

“Good. Good.” He nodded. He was fidgeting with his right hand nervously, but John noted that the left arm was mostly motionless. “D—Did you—”

“I met Oscar,” he said, replacing the brief relief on Arthur’s face with disbelief once more. “We had a conversation.”

“W—What? Oscar?” Oh, and that was pain on Arthur’s face with the hushed name. John wanted to claw his own heart out – why was he only able to bring Arthur pain?

“I told him you were here. That you wanted to speak with him.”

Arthur’s eyes widened, searching the air as if he could pierce through the darkness to find John’s face. He took a step forward, right hand reaching out ever so slightly. He was too far to touch John, who forced himself to stay in place.

“John…” Arthur breathed out, blinking the newly gathered tears away. “What… Why?”

“Because…” John hesitated, again concentrating on the pain in his left pinkie. “Because I cost you his friendship. Because you left him for me, and I,” –his voice cracked. “I’m not human.”

Arthur frowned and blinked, trying to follow the thought process. “What…”

“I don’t think like a human, and I don’t,” –he huffed. “I know you want me to become human, but I won’t. I can’t. Even this body, created from thin air has fucking tentacles, Arthur.” He took a steadying breath. “You once told me you need other people. Oscar said the same thing. He can live up to that; I—I can’t.”

Arthur took another step forward, his eyebrows slightly raised.

“And what exactly would that be?” He asked thickly. “Humanity?”

“I—” He trailed off when Arthur let out a sigh. He moved his right hand again, searching, and then raised his left one as well, as if he’d just remembered about it.

“Where are you?” He asked softly, and without thinking John stepped forward to touch his arms. Arthur grabbed the lapels of his jacket into fists and brought their bodies closer.

“I don’t want you to be human, John,” he said quietly, turning his head upward towards John’s face. John’s arms shook with the need to embrace the man, to dig his nails into his skin; a desperate urge to claw and bite – devour. “Not—anatomically or, or whatever. I don’t want you to be like Oscar, or like me. I want you to be you.”

Arthur’s knuckles turned white with how hard he clung to John’s jacket, and the sight made John’s breath come quicker.

“And—And if me isn’t something that you would—”

“John,” Arthur cut in intently. “I want you. With or without tentacles, with or without the mask—I want you. Here. With me.”

John leaned forward to join his forehead with Arthur’s, passing his hands up Arthur’s arms, and a deep growl came out of his throat without his permission. Arthur let out a small gasp at the sound.

“Ah… Are you…?”

“I’ve been…” John started almost inaudibly, every muscle in his body trembling with a need that he didn’t know how to fulfil. The tentacles in his back writhed, immaterial enough to pass through his clothes, but growing more substantial along their length for a few to eventually wrap around Arthur’s wrists. “I want…”

“What?” Arthur prompted under his breath. John could feel the warmth of it in the space between their bodies, that damned space that was still too vast.

“Ever since the ritual I’ve been feeling like,” he swallowed, his voice strained. “Like you’re too far away.”

Arthur breathed out a laugh, his hands trying to pull him closer. “John, that was the point.”

“I know,” he growled, digging his fingers into Arthur’s shoulders again. Would it leave bruises? Signs of John still being part of this body, in some strange way? “And I don’t regret it. But I don’t like that feeling.”

“What does it feel like?” Arthur asked. His face inched closer, so John could feel his breath on his lips.

“I—”

“Tell me,” he added hotly.

“It feels like losing a part of myself,” John whispered and closed his eyes against the onslaught of feelings. “It feels like my skin tearing itself from my flesh and walking away on its own. Like my place is inside your chest and your mind, and I want to claw my way back there.”

“Fuck, John…” Arthur whispered.

“Arthur, I—”

“Can I try something?” Arthur asked almost out of breath. John nodded and whispered an affirmation.

Arthur’s hands travelled higher, feeling out his shoulders and neck. Goosebumps appeared on John’s skin as a slight shiver passed through him. Arthur’s left hand rested on his neck, while the right went up to his face, feather-light fingertips tracing out his mask.

His throat rumbled with another growl and his grip on Arthur tightened.

“Does it hurt?” Arthur asked, oblivious, almost making John laugh.

“No,” he growled. “It’s not enough.”

Arthur’s eyes widened with a sudden realization, and his fingers dove into his hair and curled, nails scraping the skin.

The noise that he let out now was more akin to a purr. John’s hat fell to the ground as Arthur’s fingers travelled further with a picture of wonder on his face.

John buried his face in Arthur’s neck, pushing his forehead into the warm skin, his nose touching the white scar there. He bared his teeth, breathing hard through clenched jaws, tentacles wrapping around Arthur’s torso pulling him impossibly closer.

And yet it wasn’t enough.

It was no trouble to pick Arthur up from the ground – he was smaller and thinner as it was, and as the aftermath of his starvation in the pits, he weighed almost nothing to him. He yelped as he was raised an inch or two from the ground and moved towards the wall. John almost slammed himself against it, shielding Arthur from the impact with his limbs, and he pressed their bodies closer, finally finding some relief for that searing need.

Arthur gasped – almost moaned at the pressure; John could feel his arousal starting to dig into his thigh. Did Arthur want this? John’s need wasn’t exactly sexual in nature – at least he didn’t think it was – but Arthur’s body seemed to interpret the signals in this way. It was a topic they’d never touched – they never really had to, and John had enough decency not to invade Arthur’s privacy in this way. But this…?

“John,” Arthur breathed out and licked his lips, his hands carding through John’s hair, thumbs trailing over his face. “Can I…?”

His right thumb found John’s lips, spread them open, and felt the teeth. John let out a keening sound, barely restraining himself from biting, as Arthur’s thumb returned to rest on his lips.

Did Arthur want to kiss him? John had seen people kissing; before this, it had seemed like a strange way to pass time, mouths smashing clumsily against each other. Now, it seemed his body wanted for nothing more, his mind making it seem like there was nothing sweeter in the world than the taste of Arthur’s lips and the closeness that could give them. Tongues intertwined, saliva mixed, breaths shared – was that not as close as they could get to finally being one again?

Arthur properly moaned as soon as their lips met, and John relished the sound. He’d heard Arthur moan and whimper in pain far too many times; but to hear him do so from pleasure – from pleasure that John gave him? It was making that needy, growling beast within him hum with contentment, settling his frayed nerves. Here, he had Arthur back, he had Arthur all for himself.

Arthur’s body shifted, chasing pressure in little involuntary movements. His breath stuttered when John moved his leg, pushing his knee against the wall between his legs.

“John,” he mumbled against his lips, his breath hot and cheeks flushed, his hands clinging to him for dear life. “John.”

John had no mind for speaking. For the first time he could act instead, so he kissed Arthur’s cheekbone, pushing his lips hard into his face. He moved up to his ear – or what was left of it – and he placed his lips behind it, sucking at the skin and laving it with his tongue. Arthur gasped again, tilting his head to the side.

“Fuck,” he sighed, passing his fingers through John’s hair. “John—”

John moved to Arthur’s shoulder, quickly before the urge to bite overtook him, trailing open-mouthed kisses on his neck. He had undone the first few buttons of his shirt and uncovered the shoulder so he could lavish the skin there with his mouth.

Then, he allowed himself to bite.

Arthur was mostly skin and bones, so he did not bite hard – he didn’t want to actually hurt him. He latched onto the skin carefully, letting out a shaky breath, tongue laving in between his teeth.

Arthur’s breath caught, and John noticed he was actively stifling the sounds in his throat. Dragging his teeth along the skin, he bit again at the base of his neck.

Arthur screwed his eyes shut and curled the hand in John’s hair into a fist. John let out a little content grunt of his own at the pressure-pain on his scalp.

“John, s—stop,” Arthur let out breathlessly. “Wait.”

John froze, muscles straining, and pulled his head back just enough to look at Arthur’s face. His cheeks were flushed, lips red and slightly swollen – had he been biting them? – and as he opened his eyes, John saw they were glistening, his pupils blown wide.

“Fuck, John…” He let out. “I don’t—”

“Was that not…?” John asked, unsure all of a sudden. Arthur laughed under his breath.

“No, Christ. It was… I mean…” He took a deep breath and swallowed, clearly trying to compose himself. “You’re…” He trailed off with one more breath in an attempt to steady himself but dissolved into another bout of laughter.

“What the fuck are you laughing for?” John asked in a small outrage, but devoid of any real offence due to the sparks of genuine joy dancing in Arthur’s eyes.

“Sorry, sorry, I just…” Arthur took a deep breath. “I haven’t had… something like this in a very long time. And—And I was so afraid, when you left, that you didn’t want—”

“I want you, Arthur,” John said, his voice low. “I’m never leaving you.”

“Good,” Arthur answered. “Good, because I need you.”

“We both need each other,” John corrected, joining their foreheads again.

“Together.” Arthur nodded with a smile. His hands rested on John’s neck, fingers caressing the collar of his shirt. They caught on the tie, and his right hand followed the length of it, feeling the fabric under his fingertips.

“I don’t recall you mentioning there was a tie in the cultist’s closet,” he murmured.

“I bought it this morning,” John said. Arthur raised his eyebrows slightly.

“Oh! What does it look like? Describe it to me.”

Something warm and fluttery happened to John’s stomach, but for once, it wasn’t unpleasant.

“It’s a dark, but warm shade of brown; there is a faint pattern on it, but it’s hard to make out. It’s adorned with feathers embroidered into it with a golden thread.”

“I can feel it,” Arthur said. “It’s really nice to the touch. And it sounds pretty!”

“Yes, I—I like it.” John surprised himself with how audible the little smile on his face was. Arthur properly grinned at that, his hand coming up to caress his face. His touch wasn’t so gentle and unsure, like it had been the first time – no longer as if he was touching a porcelain cup that could be broken if you breathed on it too hard. Instead of this overwhelming urge to follow the delicate touch with claws, and teeth, and growling, it felt…

“Good,” Arthur replied. “I’m glad you had a chance to get it.”

“Arthur, I’m… sorry I didn’t say anything,” John spoke up. “I thought I’d be back before you woke up.”

“It’s alright,” Arthur sighed. “I admit it was… scary. To wake up with you not… being there.”

“I’m sorry,” John murmured again, nuzzling his nose to Arthur’s. That made him huff out a chuckle. “I’m here.”

“I’m glad.” Arthur smiled and carded his fingers through John’s hair again. “You have really nice hair, you know?”

“Oh?” John blinked down at him.

“Yes, it’s long and thick, and very soft.”

“It gets in my eyes.” John frowned, making Arthur laugh.

“I could braid it for you, if—if you want,” Arthur said, but his smile faded a little to something more wistful. “I used to… do all sorts of hairstyles for—for Faroe, I should still remember. At least some of it.”

“Yes, I’d like that.”

“But not now,” Arthur said with a sharp inhale. “Noel is still waiting for us.”

“Right, yes!” John said. “With food.”

“With food!” Arthur exclaimed, grabbing John’s shoulders as if to shake him. “I am starving, and you must be too. You haven’t eaten anything yet!”

“It’s not a very pleasant feeling,” John grumbled stepping back and letting Arthur smooth out his clothes. “I am… hesitant to be excited about this, though.”

“It is not, my friend,” Arthur said, buttoning up his shirt. “But we are about to remedy that. I promise, you’ll love it.”

John picked up his hat and let it rest on the nightstand. He looked back at Arthur, pondering whether to take his hand. He wasn’t granted much time for that, as Arthur stepped up to him and took him by the arm.

“We’re going to have to get a cane for me at some point,” Arthur said as they left the room and moved towards the elevator. “But for now this is… good.”

He rubbed John’s forearm with his hand, giving a soft smile. They stopped in front of the elevator doors, and John pushed the button to call it.

“Maybe… Maybe there’s a way we could bring your sight back,” he said through the sudden tightness in his throat. “Some sort of… a spell or a ritual, or—”

“John,” Arthur sighed sympathetically. “I appreciate that but… I think I’ve made my peace with never getting it back. If it were possible, we would have found a way already.”

The elevator arrived, and John frowned with distaste as they entered it. He pushed the button for the lobby, and after a few seconds the doors closed with a whoosh of air.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

Arthur blinked with confusion. “For what?”

“It’s unfair.” When Arthur’s confused expression didn’t change, John continued. “I took your sight and couldn’t give it back. We’ve been through so much and yet… You’re the one bearing all the scars. Even the ones that were…”

His. Arthur’s expression smoothed into a bittersweet smile.

“Yeah, I suppose it is unfair,” he said quietly. “But we’ve both been through… horrible things, John. We’ve shared so much. It doesn’t just go away because you have your own body now.”

John hummed noncommittally under his nose.

“And it doesn’t erase the scars that… you can’t easily see,” Arthur continued even quieter. “Ones that I wish I could… undo.”

John swallowed, something sinking heavily in his stomach. They were getting dangerously close to things that were too emotional to deal with even in his non-corporeal form, and he would rather not touch upon them now, when this body was so eager to react physically to his emotions.

“What I mean is,” Arthur added. “We’ve both… hurt each other, and—”

To John’s luck, the elevator stopped with a ding, and the doors opened before them. He gripped Arthur’s arm tighter.

“I know. The restaurant is just up ahead.”

As they came upon the entrance to the restaurant, John spotted Noel sitting at a table near it, with his leg crossed over his knee and a newspaper sprawled open on his lap. There was an ashtray on the table with a stub of a burnt-out cigarette. John relayed this all to Arthur, slowing down their pace as he talked. Noel looked up from the newspaper when they approached.

“Hi, there.”

“Hello, Noel,” John said, feeling a tight knot in his stomach. He doubted this was due to hunger. “Chair is here, on your right, Arthur.”

“Ah, thanks.” Arthur sat down, letting go of John’s arm. John sat opposite Noel, who watched him with a curious smile.

“So, what’s the appropriate social conduct here?” Noel quirked an eyebrow in amusement. “Should I be congratulating you two?”

“Uh, I’m not sure,” Arthur let out a laugh. “Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Believe me, kid, I got nowhere else I’d rather be,” Noel snorted. “There’s a stack of boring paperwork back in my office that I’m very eager to avoid.”

Arthur laughed again. “What’s your excuse to get out in the field, then?”

“Oh, had a few ideas cross my mind,” he leaned back in his chair with a smirk, which John quietly said to Arthur. That earned him a briefly surprised look from Noel, that turned into a slight nod. “You did say something about a missing persons case, though it seems we solved that one pretty quickly. Technically, you’re still wanted back in Arkham.” Noel raised his eyebrows. “Can always chalk it up to that.”

“Right,” Arthur shook his head with a sigh. “Arkham.”

“Don’t sweat it, kid, no one’s actually looking for you anymore,” Noel said with a more serious tone. “Had to… swoop in and weave a couple lies here and there. Came up with quite the story by the end of it, but I got you off the main suspect list, and they’ve labelled it a cold case. So, technically you’re still in the papers but everyone’s moved on to other things.”

Arthur blinked at that. “You… You did?”

“Thank you, Noel,” John said, equally taken aback.

“Wh—I mean, thank you, that’s…” Arthur laughed in disbelief. “I can’t believe it. But why? You—You didn’t have to.”

“You kidding? It’s the least I could do,” Noel said. “I would not be here if it wasn’t for you two.”

The waitress came up to their table at that moment with menus and asked about drinks, so the conversation shifted. John observed Noel as he talked; he hadn’t changed much since the last time they saw each other. The greying light brown hair was brushed to the back of his head, his face was wrinkled in places and scarred in others, and his grey eyes still glistened with humor and intelligence. The biggest difference was the circular scar on the side of his neck, freshly healed and no doubt causing pain. The top button of Noel’s shirt was undone, and John imagined the collar would have irritated the skin otherwise. When the man moved his head, there was a slight wince of pain on his face, yet you would not be able to tell from his voice alone that something was amiss. John did not tell Arthur that; he realized there were certain drawbacks to other people being able to hear his descriptions. It would certainly sour the mood of the conversation if John brought it up.

“Anything for you, John?” Arthur asked, bringing his attention back to being an active part of the scene instead of just quietly watching. He blinked with surprise; they were ordering drinks, right?

“Uh, just water,” he said, feeling Arthur and Noel paying keen attention to him. The waitress nodded to them and walked away.

“Well, that reminds me, John,” Noel started, planting his elbows on the table with a curious look on his face. “How are you finding the physical plane?”

John let out a soft sigh.

“It’s a lot,” he said with a measured tone. “There seems to be a lot going on in a human body that I haven’t… realized, before.”

“Hah, I bet,” Noel laughed. “Wait till you eat. Do you like it so far?”

John raised his eyebrows, thinking. “It was… overwhelming at first. But I think I’ve gotten used to it.” He glanced at Arthur, not being able to hold back a slight smile. “There are some unpleasant parts of it but… Other parts, I think I quite like.”

Noel raised a curious eyebrow with a smirk. He covered his mouth, as if to whisper something to Arthur and said, “Just so you know, Arthur, John is looking at you right now with a very nice smile.”

John felt his cheeks warm up.

Arthur raised his eyebrows at him with a little smirk of his own. “Is he?”

“Aw, I think I got him blushing,” Noel crooned.

“Yes, that would be one of the unpleasant parts,” he said, trying to stifle the embarrassment. Noel laughed warmly, and John felt Arthur’s knee touch his under the table.

“Sorry, John,” Noel said with an apologetic smile. “I simply couldn’t resist.”

The rest of the meal passed in a similar atmosphere, with John deciding to try eggs on toast with a few frankfurters and rating them as tolerable. He wasn’t fond of the texture of the eggs, but he did like the toast and sausages. The sensations of eating and swallowing themselves weren’t the most comfortable, but the feeling of his stomach filling brought new energy and some kind of… exhilaration into his body. Yes, he could understand why Arthur liked it so much.

“So, what’s next for you guys?” Noel asked after they’ve finished eating and exited onto the street. “Staying in the city for a while?”

“For a while, probably,” Arthur said, as they directed their steps towards Noel’s car. “I want to visit my father, and Marie. And—And Oscar…” He turned his head towards John. “You said—”

“Yes,” John nodded. “You should talk to him.”

“Are you sure you’re alright with it?” Arthur asked. “I told you when we left him at the hospital—”

“Arthur, we’re not in one body anymore,” John interrupted him, squeezing his arm a bit tighter. “I may not find his company the most… interesting, but it wasn’t my intention to keep you away from other people.”

“I know, I just…” Arthur took a deep breath. “Alright, you’re right. I should talk to him.”

“He’s still at the community center,” John said.

“How was—Was he… alright?” Arthur asked.

“He seemed to be,” John shrugged. “It looked like he was focusing on the people in the church.”

“You went into a church?” Noel asked with a raised eyebrow.

“What, did you think I’d catch on fire?” John replied with a deadpan voice that had Noel snort out a laugh. “Yes, I went into the church.”

Noel turned towards a black police car and opened up the door from the passenger side.

“Alright, hop in and figure out where I’m dropping you off.”

With some effort they managed to clamber into the back of the car and settle into the seats. Noel closed the doors behind them and walked around the car to get to the driver’s seat.

“I’m glad he has other people to help,” Arthur said quietly with a smile.

“I think you had that impact on him, Arthur,” John said, while Noel got into the car and started up the engine. “He didn’t mention you, but I know he was talking about you when I asked about his reason. You didn’t stay with him just as a person; you stayed with him as an ideal to follow.”

He felt his voice thicken with emotion. “And I know something about that myself.”

Arthur blinked, the amused smile from before turning into something misty-eyed and bittersweet. “John…”

“You’ve shown me what it means to be human, Arthur,” John spoke quietly, lacing their fingers together. “And while I will never be one, I… appreciate what I have learned. What I can continue to learn.”

The car moved onto the street, and Noel seemed to focus on driving, only occasionally glancing at them in the rearview mirror. Subtly, as not to alert him, one of John’s tendrils snaked out of his shirt and wrapped around Arthur’s shoulder to pull him closer. He gasped softly, quietly enough that only John heard it.

“You showed me that life could have a meaning. Could have a purpose,” he continued in a whisper. “And now, I am met with the question of what that purpose is for me. What I value. What I want.”

“John, you don’t have to know all these things so soon after—”

“But I think I do,” he said, putting his head to Arthur’s temple. Arthur shifted slightly. “You have taught me the meaning of hope. And I want that, Arthur. I want to have hope. And I want to have you.”

Arthur let out a breath and smiled slightly, rubbing his thumb on John’s hand. “The woods are lovely, dark, and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep.”

John closed his eyes with a smile of his own. “And miles to go before we sleep.”

[queensunshinee]

Time Of Our Lives || Part 17

Part 17:

The silence in Liana and Patrick's room had a static tint. Like hearing a sound from an old song over and over again but not knowing which song it is. A familiar but distant feeling. A repression that explodes in your face. Over and over and over again.

The knowledge that she was alone made it easier for her to release the tears, as if in this characterless room, in the fancy hotel, she could allow herself to be well…herself. And all she wanted right now was to lie on the bed in a fetal position and cry over the years she wasted. Over the time that won't come back. Over wrong choices. Over mistakes. Mistakes. Mistakes. So many mistakes. Why couldn't she be one of those people who shout "bingo" after exactly three rounds? Why does everything have to be complicated? Why does someone else always win?

Patrick came in late. As if he wasn’t even trying to hide what he did. Liana fell asleep easily, it was past midnight, and he expected her to be asleep. To his surprise, the light was on and Liana was packing a suitcase. "Lilo, what's going on?" He swallowed hard. He didn't see her face but his heart was racing, 'You know what's going on.' "Lilo," her voice was quiet, and sarcasm washed over her like the last of the cynics as she chuckled while repeating the nickname.

"Where were you, Patrick?" She turned to him, and he swallowed hard. She was swollen and red from crying and anger, and like always, all her emotions were displayed on her face like a billboard. He had seen her contempt for him before, but not like this. Not with such determination.

"Liana," he closed his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing. "Be a man and say it," she said, not moving, continuing to look vaguely at him, past him. He was silent. "Pussy," she rolled her eyes and went back to the suitcase. She sounded like Tashi for a moment, and Patrick wanted to die. Sweet, gentle Liana. The one who thinks eight times before saying something, sounded like Tashi. "Liana, look at me for a second. Wait a minute." He wanted to throw up. He didn’t know how to stop her anger. How to minimize the damage. How to make sure she stayed where she was. How to make sure she would let him get close to her again. "If you touch me, I'll stab you in the eye." She said with feigned indifference when she heard his steps approaching her. "Please look at me." He begged. "Liana." His voice was more authoritative, knowing she wouldn’t withstand it. That her desire to feel needed and good was usually greater than her anger. "It won't work. Not this time. Not when it comes to Tashi Duncan." She said, as if knowing in advance what his strategy would be. What he would try to do.

"Let me explain. Please." He would get on his knees if he had to. She couldn't leave this room without knowing that he loved her. That he would leave his entire life for her. As he had done once before.

"Thank God I don’t have your baby. God, what a mess would that be." She muttered to herself as she closed the suitcase. Patrick took a few steps back. "What are you talking about?" He also had tears in his eyes, and he felt like he couldn't breathe. "What the hell are you talking about? Hey, look at me!" He approached her, raising his voice with every word he spoke.

"Do you really think I would have kept your baby, Patrick? As if this whole life isn’t a mistake anyway," she shook her head from side to side, saying the most venomous and painful things she could think of. "What baby?" His voice returned to being quiet. Like a child who was promised a puppy and then told he hadn't behaved well enough. "Ask Tashi." She scoffed and walked past him towards the door.

Patrick didn't stop her.

Art couldn't look at Tashi. They were supposed to go over videos of his competitor and do a short practice before today’s game, but he couldn’t look at her, and he couldn’t hide it either. "Did you tell her?" she asked after 20 minutes of awkward silences and business as usual. "Huh?" he didn’t understand. "Liana, did you tell her?" she asked more slowly. Sometimes it took Art a moment to understand. "What did I tell her?" His heart started to race. "Oh my God, Art, you saw me and Patrick yesterday. Don’t tell me you didn’t tell her." She reacted as if it was obvious. "You saw me?" he asked. "Of course I saw you. You wore green and stood out like a traffic light." She rolled her eyes. "And you still went with Patrick." He didn’t understand.

"Oh my God, Art. Just answer me, did you tell Liana or not?" She was starting to lose patience completely. "Yes..." he turned red and couldn’t look at her, "I’m sorry, I couldn’t hide it from her, Tash-" he started a monologue, hoping it wouldn’t cost him his friendship with Tashi. He had gotten used to her presence more than he was willing to admit, and she really did make him a better player. "Good, did you seal the deal?" she asked, and he blinked at her, not understanding anything anymore.

"Tashi, what?" he asked, feeling like they were having a conversation between a deaf person and a mute one, at this point. "Art, God help me, did you fuck her?" she asked directly for a change, reaching the conclusion that she couldn’t hint at anything with him. "What? No!" he was startled by her accusation. He would've jumped out of the couch if he hadn’t been more concerned about his composure in front of her.

"Why the hell not?" she asked in disbelief. "I don’t understand this conversation." He voiced his thoughts aloud. He was maroon-colored at this point. "I made it so easy for you, Arthur, what else needs to happen for you to claim what is yours?" She looked him in the eyes and saw him swallow hard.

"Liana is not mine." He said. Loser. "She’s not Patrick’s anymore. That’s for sure." She replied. Tashi really and truly didn’t understand what was holding him back. For a year she had seen him fumbling in the dark with the girl he looked at with hearts in his eyes. A year. Who doesn’t give up after a year?! Maybe someone who carries the key to her room for five years like a pathetic fool while she’s in a relationship with his best friend. But Tashi knew more than Art. Tashi saw Liana up close as a woman sees another woman. She saw the dark circles around her eyes and the despair. She saw so much despair.

And Patrick has this ability, Tashi thinks. To be the best and the worst at the same time. Like an electric current throughout the body, there are places where it feels good and places where it burns. Patrick mostly burns. And Tashi saw Liana six months ago, almost completely burnt out. Almost begging for a lifeline.

So she gave a push. She gave a little shove in hopes that everything would sort itself out. If Art had enough balls, everything would have been sorted out yesterday, but in the meantime, everyone keeps suffering and paying for his mistakes from five years ago.

"Okay," she sighed. "Let’s go back to the video and leave this until we get back from Atlanta, alright?" she asked. "But Tash-" he tried to resist. There were so many questions on the tip of his tongue. "Art. You are going to win this tournament. You are going to be the winner of this week, do you understand me?" she asked in the most authoritative and serious voice she could find. Art had no choice but to nod.

Hey, can we talk? -Patrick-

Liana -P- Hey, not sure if you saw, but I won the Atlanta Open, wish you were here. How are you? -Art- Hey girl, you haven’t answered your phone for a few days, should I be worried? -Melissa- Liana, if you don’t answer me, I’m coming to America and staying in your shitty apartment until I grow old. -M- Patrick and I broke up. -L- Do you want me to come? -M- Always. -L- I miss you. -P- Liana. we need to talk, we can’t leave things like this. -P- Just tell me you're okay. -P- You weren’t at the construction site today, can I call you? -A- I packed all your things, when can you pick them up? -L- Liana, can we talk like adults? Please. -P- Lilo, I’m begging you. -P- Okay, tomorrow at 8 PM, is that okay? -P- Leave the key in the closet outside when you’re done. -L- You won’t be at the apartment? -P- Hey, can I come over tomorrow around 8 PM? -L- Of course. Here’s the address. -A-

Liana heard a knock on the door at two in the afternoon and got annoyed. She didn’t want to see Patrick, and they had agreed that he would come to get his things at eight in the evening. Why couldn’t he just do one thing properly for once?!

“We agreed you’d come at eight, so what the fuck is this?!” she asked as she opened the door, seeing Tashi standing there. “I decided to come early,” Tashi replied sarcastically. “Can I come in?” she asked and entered without waiting for an invitation.

Liana was dressed in an oversized T-shirt and shorts. If Tashi had to guess, and she didn’t really want to, the shirt probably belonged to Patrick. Her hair was greasy, and she looked like she hadn’t slept since Tashi last saw her briefly in Atlanta, three weeks ago.

“You don’t have a couch in your living room,” Tashi said. The small space that could barely be called a living room looked empty, filled with boxes that Tashi assumed were Patrick’s, but the absence of the couch was noticeable. “I paid the neighbor $150 to get rid of it or burn it. I don’t know. Why are you here?” Liana asked, looking at her with complete disinterest.

“You and I, we’re not friends, you remember that, right?” Tashi said. “You came to my house to tell me we’re not friends? You slept with my boyfriend, I figured out we’re not friends on my own.” Liana rolled her eyes. Indifference was the only thing evident in her voice. Maybe also exhaustion. “I just remember you sitting across from me in a café, me asking if you wanted to be friends, and you saying something like ‘God no’. We were both there, right?” Tashi reminded her of their conversation when Liana had asked her to accompany her to the clinic.

“Well done, Tashi, you did a good deed for a complete stranger, and now what? You won’t rest until we all remember that you’re actually a bitch?” Liana asked, looking at her. “Look at you, how much character you’ve developed in these weeks,” Tashi replied and chuckled. “What the fuck do you want? I’m busy.” Liana said, turning her back to her. “With Self-pity?” Tashi asked. “Do you need something? Did you come to gloat? What’s the purpose of your visit? How do we finish this faster?” Liana ignored her question.

The truth was, Liana pitied herself a lot. She had ended a relationship with someone she really loved, who had hurt her so much there was nothing left. And she probably still loved him. And she probably always would. And what did it say about her if she was willing to love someone who treated her like gum stuck to the sole of his shoe? But Tashi didn’t need to know all that.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry if you got hurt.” Tashi sighed, and Liana turned to her, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t think you’re supposed to get hurt, but I’m sorry if you did,” she added quickly. “I’m not supposed to get hurt by the fact that my boyfriend of the last four years slept with someone I trusted enough to ask for help when I had no one else to ask?” Liana asked in response. Her leg started to shake uncontrollably.

“You’re not in a relationship with me, I don’t owe you anything.” Tashi shrugged. “Do you want to hear what I think, Liana?” she asked.

“No, not really.” “I think you chose wrong. I think one of them thrives when you’re with him, and one of them withers when you’re with him. You chose wrong. And now you’re dealing with your choices. Because we both know Art worships you, and when you stand next to him, he’s the best he can be. He proves to you he’s the best he can be. He’ll be the best for you because you’re there, next to him. Watching.” She paused to catch her breath but looked at Liana with a gaze that made it clear she wasn’t finished.

“Patrick, on the other hand. He’s at his best when he needs to prove to you that he deserves your attention. The moment he got it, he lost it. He lost interest. He lost the reason to prove himself. He stopped striving higher. He wilts. You think he’s draining your will to live? Just by agreeing to be his, you took away his reason to live. It’s too comfortable for him now. He doesn’t need to impress you anymore, and who is Patrick Zweig when he doesn’t need to impress Liana Levy? A shadow of the person he was. You chose wrong, and you know it.” She finished, examining Liana, who just looked at her with tear-filled doe eyes.

“Buy a couch, Liana, or better yet, leave this shithole. It smells like mold here. Art’s apartment is nice, and I think he’d be happy to have you as a roommate.” Tashi applied what looked like hand sanitizer, patted Liana’s shoulder twice, and left the apartment.

All Liana could do was sit on the floor, crying. She didn’t have a couch to hold on to for the remnants of her self-respect.

heyyy :) kinda shorter chapter but I felt like it was a needed one. also, once again, we have more Tashi 🤭 as always, talk to me, the askbox is very open <3

taglist: @soberbabes @nina357 @lamoursansfin @marley1773 @ruyaas-world @apolloscastellan @primlovesdilfs @fangirl-kimora @serenadingtigers @imbabycowboy @do-it-for-kicks @izzywags478 @4deline08 @igotmajordaddyissues @jackierose902109 @ganana @yoitsme-04 @swetearss

[welcometogrouchland]

I miss them so bad (Dick and Damian)

[spielzeugkaiser]

the love child update from today was 🔥🔥🔥 outstanding as always, i’ve read it like 12 times already i love them sm

i can’t remember if this is smth you already addressed, so feel free to ignore this if it is, but does milek know that geralt is his dad? like obviously jaskier told him to find geralt if he was ever in trouble, and he knows about their friendship, but does he know how far it went? and if he does, does he know that geralt doesn’t know? i just feel like that conversation they had today could be read so many different ways, like are they talking past each other? is milek facepalming bc goddamnit both his dads are morons, fucking typical? so many possibilities!

Ohh, that is a good question, I guess the whole thing is a bit convoluted.

Milek knows that Geralt is his father, he knows that his parents have a long, but complicated history (in which Milek is under the impression that his parents were a couple at one point and Jaskier feels like they were fuckbuddies at best. He felt rather used at times, more like a substitute for Yennefer).

Milek was taught from a young age that he is not supposed to tell anyone about this. First it was a safety measure because Nilfgaard was looking for them and later it continued to be one; they're already not seen in the most positive light and in the best case, it would look like he's lying. In the worst case he would meet anti-witcher sentimentalities. He learned later that Geralt has no idea either - which is something Jaskier needed some time to realise too, as he was accusing Geralt in his talk with Yennefer here about knowing it, but still sending him away.

So there are years of secrecy drilled into Milek, and he knows Jaskier would be fine with him telling Geralt, because I do think Jaskier and Milek had the the talk once he was older that it's his decision if he wants to get to know and tell his father, or not, but.

I think he imagined that talk a hundred times. He daydreamed about this a lot. But now, in reality? The thought of saying something is a suddenly very, very scary.

[fairy-angel222]

𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍’𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐃? 𝐈’𝐌 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐒, 𝑫𝑶𝑪𝑻𝑶𝑹

prisoner! sukuna x psychologist! reader

✧ synopsis: you’ve been assigned to the supposed most ‘dangerous’ prisoner, sukuna. but what happens when you two start to fall for each other instead?

✧ cw: smut, quick paced, semi public sex, risky sex, choking, kissing, pussy eating, blow jobs, breeding, creampie, fingering, orgasm denial, dirty talk, age gap

✧ wc: 4.7k

✧ a/n: i am not a doctor and i am especially not specialized in psychology. i have made up all of this. also don’t sleep with murderers unless it’s sukuna

Your heels clicked loudly on the stained prison tiles. The echo of your soft footsteps trailing along the narrow walls of the enclosed hallway.

Sukuna.

That was the prisoner you were assigned to. A man who had killed more people than you’d met in your entire life as a doctor, a psychologist at that. So you’d met a lot of people.

Two guards trailed closely behind you, glaring warningly at the inmates who smirked as you walked past the line of cells. A collection of whistles and cheers sounding at the mere sight of a woman as attractive as yourself.

How long had it been since they’d seen one after all.

“Hey Doc… you sure you wanna take this case.. i mean, i don’t doubt ya or anything but this one.. he’s bad. Dangerous.”

“Now what kind of doctor would i be if i feared a little danger. He’s still a patient.” You smiled, ignoring the way your hairs stood as you were led deeper into the institution. The part where they held those deemed a danger to society.

Those who had a no chance of even seeing sunlight again.

You were nervous, your heart thumping loudly in your chest when you scanned your surroundings. There weren’t any cells. There were only.. rooms. Fully enclosed rooms with a singular window for passing food.

Every part of your being begged for you to turn around and run. To not even interact with whoever sat on the other side of that door. And you froze when bright red eyes pierced into yours. The rest of his face casted behind a dark shadow as his head tilted back. Giving you sight to the small smirk creeping onto his features.

“Doc, i really think that-” It was the other guard who spoke up. Both of them holding nothing on their features but fear. It was clear that they never even bothered with Sukuna. The rumors had been enough to make every guard turn a blind eye.

“Hey, it’s fine. Okay? This is what i do.” It really was. The guard gave you a curt nod and a sigh when you clasped both his hands in your smaller one. Offering him a reassuring nod.

“If anything happens, us and about five others are stationed close. Good luck Doc.”

You gave him a small thanks, your head held high as the door was pulled open roughly. Revealing a pink haired man who sat on his bed against the walls, his eyebrow raising when you dared to step inside. Nodding to the guard to close the door.

You might as well have been a dead woman.

“You’re scared.” His deep voice rung out, keeping his eyes on you as you pulled out a small chair that was tucked away near the sink.

“And how do you know, Sukuna?” Your tone was steady, letting out a breath when the shakiness you felt wasn’t reflected in your voice.

Sukuna hummed, his smirk widening when you spoke to him like a normal being. To stuttering, no harshness. Just your sweet voice saying his name. “I can smell it, Doc.” He loved the way you tried to hide your squirm under his gaze.

“So, Sukuna. Tell me something about yourself.” You steered away from his accusation, holding eye contact even when he leaned forward. Taking you in from head to toe. You were hot, he liked that. You seemed to like being confident too. And God did you smell fucking delicious.

He wanted to eat you alive.

Break you.

Use you.

He really did. But you were so fascinating, and he’d only just met you. Who knew how entertaining you could be.

“I’ve killed people.” He was blunt, eyes almost begging you to keep asking these ridiculous questions. It was making his cock twitch.

“Well Sukuna, that is common knowledge, don’t ya think? I wanna know something else.. tell me a secret hmm?” You leaned forward with a smile, elbows rested on your knees as you looked to him for a response.

He reciprocated your actions, leaning forward until you felt his hot breath fan over your face. “A secret huh? Alright Doc..” he watched as your breathing sped up, using every strength in your body to not pull back. You were brave, he liked that. “I surprisingly don’t wanna kill you right now.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

“I said right now, didn’t say anything about later.” He pushed away from you, one of his knees up to his chest when he leaned back against the concrete wall behind him. “Let me ask you, Doctor. Are you stupid?”

Your head tilted at where this was going. You were supposed to be the one asking the questions. But a conversation was two sided, this would’ve made things easier. “I’d like to believe not. Why do you ask?”

“Because you really think that if i try to kill you, some measly guards would come to your rescue.” He scoffed.

“But you don’t want to kill me. That’s all that matters.”

Fair.

Sukuna watched as you took a quick peek down at his files. There was something that you missed, that much was evident. “Finally found it huh?”

“I haven’t found anything that i didn’t see before.” You objected, glancing to the door with your lip hanging loosely between your teeth.

“Don’t. Don’t do that.” He demanded lowly, watching with lidded eyes as you let your plump bottom lip, slick after running your tongue over it, fall back into place. Sukuna breathed deeply, finally looking away from you as he swallowed hard. Closing his eyes with his head rested behind him.

There was something about you that he wanted a taste of. It was driving him crazy..er, “I never did anything to these other doctors. They were just weak. Got scared way too fast.”

“And what did you do to scare them away?”

“Nothing.” He spat, “They came in here acting all high and mighty, talked to me like i was beneath them. So i simply didn’t bother to hide how much i wanted to strangle them. And somehow that makes me the bad guy right Doc?”

You shook your head, “No, you have a right to respect too. They should never have treated you as unequals.” Lying was all in the job description.

“Good try Doc. But you and i both know that’s a load of crap.” He finally peeled his eyes back open, and you couldn’t help your mind from wandering to how attractive he was in the dim light. He was extremely built, and had the facial structure that made you clench your thighs. “Now, we gonna finish our game of twenty one questions or not?”

He was actually being cooperative.

“Yes we are. How about i start?”

“I’ll start.” There was no room for objection in his tone. “What’s your name?”

You contemplated whether to tell him or not, eventually letting it out with ease. Though you missed the small smile tugging at his lips when he muttered a small “cute.”

“My turn, what was your childhood like?” You watched his face grow cold, a small glare being directed at anything in the room but you. “Next question.”

“Sukuna..”

“I said next question. How old are you?”

You sighed, “I’m twenty eight.” His eyes widened, that was extremely young for a doctor. “Is there one good memory you have from before you killed for the first time?”

“I had twin kittens. Do you have a boyfriend?”

You were taken aback by the question, mouth opening and closing a few times before you chuckled. “No. I do not have a boyfriend.”

“Good.”

You jumped when the door was yanked open, the guard eyeing Sukuna warily before nodded to you. “Your time’s up, Doc.”

“Oh, already? Could we get just a few more minutes?”

“You know how dangerous he is Doc.. we can’t risk it.”

“You heard the man. I’m dangerous, Doctor.”

You nibbled at your lips softly, and Sukuna fought a groan as you did exactly what he warned you not to. Standing up, you gave Sukuna a warm smile, the gesture making his stomach get all weird inside. “Goodbye until our next session Sukuna.”

He only hummed, the door being shut behind you as you were led away.

It was back to darkness.

There was more than enough light, sure. But it suddenly felt so empty without you there.

—

You couldn’t keep Sukuna off your mind when you arrived home. A part of you just really wanted to figure him out. The other actually liked his company.

You must’ve been so sick in the head. Splashing your face with cold water as you mentally scolded yourself. What was wrong with you? He was a criminal.

—

The next morning you walked the path that you had taken the previous day to get to Sukuna. This time without the guards following you.

There was only one who stood outside of the door to let you in with a small nod of acknowledgement.

Sukuna’s head perked up at the familiar clicking of those heels you wore. His signature smirk on his face as he stared you down. “Just couldn’t get enough huh Doc? Aren’t you forgetting that i’m dangerous?”

You took a seat, no file in had this time. “Good morning Sukuna, how are you?”

“If i said better now that you’re here, would that be cliché?”

You laughed, an actual laugh. A sweet one that made his heart flutter the tiniest bit while blood rushed to his groin.

“It’s very good to see you too. How about we get started yeah?” You paused as you collected your thoughts. “You seem to be heavily affected by people calling you.. dangerous. Why?”

“Everybody is dangerous. It just takes pushing at the right buttons to get it out of them. Half of the people here have done just as bad as i have yet i’m the only dangerous one. Makes so much sense right?.”

He shook his head. “Tell me Doctor, do you really think i just happened to get caught? That i couldn’t get out of this damn place if i wanted too? Hell, tell me you realize that i could drop a good twenty more bodies right here, right now.”

You shifted in your seat. “I think that you let yourself get caught because you’re tired. Because there’s a small sense of peace you get from being in here. And i think that you aren’t trying to leave because you don’t want to.”

“You almost had it Doc. See, i was well on my way out until you came. So i might stick around for just a little bit longer.”

Your heart fluttered, for you? Giving up on fighting the rational side of you as you continued to engage in conversation. Getting Sukuna to slowly open up to you more.

“Do you have any friends Sukuna?”

“I don’t consider people friends. They just exist alongside me.”

“If I asked you to be your friend, what would you say?” It was routine, but you really were curious.

“I’d say you came be whatever you want to be Doc.”

Another flutter.

“Have you ever been in love Sukuna?”

He was silent, jaw clenching as his gaze got harsh. “Next question.”

“What was she like?”

“I said next fucking question Doctor.”

“And i said, what was she like?” You leaned forward, pressing for him to answer the question.

“You’re stubborn aren’t you? I wonder what my hand would loom like around that pretty little neck.” He grinned, sharp teeth peeling from beneath his lips as he brought his face to yours. “She was a lot like you.”

“What happened to her?” You knew how touchy that question would’ve been.

“Nothing. The bitch left.”

Oh.

“I’m sorry.”

He stared at you in confusion, “I never said she died.”

“Yes. But that’s only physically. When she broke your heart she died to you. And that hurts just as bad.”

He was silent, studying your eyes. Trying to get a read on you. “What else do you want to know Doc?”

You were getting somewhere.

Sukuna found you smart. Thought that you knew a lot. Found it hot how good you were at cracking him. But it pissed him off that the one thing you didn’t seem to pick up was how much it hurt to watch you leave at the end of each session.

—

A week later had led to a Monday morning where you hadn’t gone to the prison. You had quite an agenda for the day that could cost you your job if you didn’t get it done.

That was something Sukuna was obviously clueless about. It was why he thought you’d just decided to up and go after he had just started liking to have you around. After he’d started opening up to you.

It was also why he was causing a fit. Yelling at guards to get you to him now. That he wanted to see you. Needed to see you. A line of men laying knocked out atop each other from being sent to ‘handle’ the crazed prisoner.

Would you really not come back? Would you really abandon him? It seemed like that was common with the people he cared even the slightest for.

Sukuna’s fist met the wall near his bed, knuckles bloodied as he cracked into the hard surface. Chest heaving up and down heavily when his hands reached to tug at strands of pink.

He blinked when he heard the clicking of heels on the tiles. Immediately scowling at the unfamiliarity of them. “Who the fuck is this?” He growled through the small window.

“This is Dr Smith, she’s-”

“I don’t fucking care who she is. Bring me my doctor. Now.”

—

Back at your flat, you dropped the piles of paper in front of you at the sound of your phone ringing.

It was a number you didn’t have saved.

“Hello, Doctor ___ speaking- yes? Oh my. I- i am so sorry. Yes, i will be there right away.”

What had you done?

You practically ran through the halls after parking outside the building. Finding many guards posted outside his door with guns in hand. Some of them spotting very black and blue eyes.

“You can all go now.” You panted, it was clear that you had been in a hurry. “Please.”

They all shared a look, finally walking away and allowing you to slowly open the door.

“Where were you?”

“I’m really sorry Sukuna. I was so busy today and-” you gasped when a hand reached out to wrap around your neck. Slamming you into the wall behind you with his face buried in your neck.

Sukuna inhaled your floral scent, groaning to himself as his grip on your delicate skin tightened. “So you just left me here today? Am i not as important as your other little patients? Is that it hmm?”

Deep down, you had hurt his feelings. And he couldn’t help the way he clung to you as your hand lifted to his cheek. Turning his face to look down at yours.

“N-no i promise you. You’re just as important as anyone else. I would have never missed our session if i didn’t have to.”

“Make it up to me.”

It was the perfect opportunity.

“W-what?”

“Strip for me Doctor.” He let go of your neck, letting you catch your breath while looking up at him timidly.

“Sukuna..”

“Why so shy now doctor? We both know you want to.”

You shook your head, shrinking under his gaze with a protesting whisper. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Sukuna. This is very unprofession— ahh.”

Sukuna brought his knee up between your thighs, pressing it into your clothed clit. His lips ghosted over your ear, hot breath fanning your skin as he breathed deeply. “You can always leave if you want to. I’m used to that after all.”

You shifted on your feet when your back arched. A small whine leaving your mouth when he pulled away from you and gestured to the door.

He smirked, “Blouse first.”

You bit your lip, unbuttoning your shirt until your bra was on display. The heavy swell of your breasts causing Sukuna’s mouth to water when he nodded to the bra.

With your eyes still on his you let your breasts spring out of their confinement. Two pert nipples pointing right at him as his dick rose. His hand palming himself under the pair of black pants with a shiver. “C’mere.”

You walked over to him on shaky legs. Sitting down on his lap with your head to the floor. “Uh uh,” His hand reached under the your chin to force your eyes back on his. “None of that Doc.”

You moaned when his tongue swirled around one of your nipples. Sucking your breast into his mouth while he palmed at the other. “These are even more perfect outside that tight fucking shit of yours.”

Sukuna watched as you shivered when he ran his finger down your belly. Cupping your clothed cunt with the jerk of his hips into your ass. “Fuck.. take that off.”

You hurriedly peeled off your pants, Sukuna’s pupils dilating at the sight of your lace panties. “Wore this just f’me hmm Doc? All this for Mr Dangerous.” He groaned out.

Sukuan didn’t give you a chance to respond before flipping you onto the hard mattress they called a bed. Lifting your heel clad feet onto his shoulders with his head hovering over your pussy. His tongue darting out to lick at the wet spot building from your arousal. “You’re real dirty f’ a doctor.” He teased, glancing behind him with a chuckle. “Imagine if you got caught.”

Your eyes shot up to the small window, taking note of the vacant corridor as per your request.

“God, you smell so fucking good. Wanna devour that pretty pussy.” He breathed, large hand ripping the flimsy fabric to expose your glistening folds. “Hmm, this wet all for me.”

You mewled when his long tongue licked a stripe up your slit. Swirling around your clit before sloppily dipping into your hole. His hums sending vibrations through your clit as he lapped at your dripping slick.

“Sukuna—” you mewled, back arching as you reached for his hair. Tugging softly with the curl of your toes when his tongue and fingers swapped places. The two joints fucking up roughly into your g spot as he sucked noisily at your clit. “F-fuckk, nngh— so good.” You cried out, tears welling in the corner of your eyes as your body filled with pleasure.

“Yeah? You like that Doc? Bet you wanna get that greedy cunt stuffed right after.” He grunted, your eyes rolling back in a string of muffled moans as your other hand shot up to your lips.

Your legs began to tremble, Sukuna’s smirk growing wider and wider until he stopped his movements. Watching as you blinked down at him with a sniffled whine.

“You left me. You know how much that fucking hurt? I thought i would never see you again.”

“I’m-”

“You’re sorry. Yeah, yeah.. i know.” He rolled his eyes, crawling over your body with a sigh. Using the pad of his thumb to wipe away a stray tear before pressing his lips to yours. Making you taste yourself on his tongue.

You fell deeper into the kiss, eyes closing in satisfaction as his lips moves hungrily on yours. Pulling away with a string of salvia connected you to him.

“Let’s reverse the roles yeah?” He whispered, standing up to sit in the chair that you usually sat in. “So, my adorable little patient.. put these tiny fingers to work on that clit of yours. I want you to make yourself cum.”

You whimpered, your fingers immediately meeting your sensitive clit with a shiver.

“You know what to do.” He encouraged. Your fingers beginning to rub small circles on the small bud before speeding up. Little gasps and moans falling past your lips as your stomach burned with heat.

Your eyes locking onto Sukuna’s red ones as his head tilted. Just like it had the first day you met him. “Ahh, K-kuna. Fuckk.” You cried, head falling back with your eyes still on his. The primal look in his eyes making your insides flutter as he did nothing but watch you. Not even freeing his painfully hard cock.

“Sukuna— c-can’t. Can’t hold it.” Your voice cracked, body shaking lightly as your orgasm washed over you.

“Yes you can.”

“Nngh, can’t Kuna. Need to let go.”

He stayed quiet for what felt like an eternity, your breathing getting heavy as you desperately waited on his permission.

He leaned his head back, eyes boring into your fingers working your wet cunt before nodding. “Go ahead.”

You came with a silent moan, body spasming uncontrollably as your pussy leaked onto his only pair of sheets.

“Dirty, dirty girl. Look at that mess.” You shied away feom his gaze. “And look at how hard you made me. Come fix it.”

You stood on wobbly feet, barely able to balance in your heels as you fell to your knees before him. Looking up at him through your lashes while pulling down his pants.

You blinked at the mere size of his bulge. He was huge. Tugging off his underwear to reveal his thick, veiny length. Pointing up to the sky with a fiery red tip. “Suck.”

You took him past your lips, barely able to take even half of him before he hit the back of your throat. Your fist stroking all the parts of him you couldn’t take.

Sukuna groaned, head flinging back with another strained one at how good your mouth felt. “S-shit doc. You really got a mouth on ya.” He gasped, eyes meeting yours as you attempted to take him down your throat. Your drool coating both your lips and his cock as you lewdly sucked him off.

He took your head into his hold, letting you do your own thing as he grunted with each jerk of his hips. Defined abs tensing when he grew closer to his release.

“Fuck Doc, gon’ shoot my cum down that tight throat of yours.” He breathed. Holding you down onto him as you gagged and sputtered lightly, Sukuna’s cock twitching before you felt the warm liquid run down your throat.

“Wish i could fuck that pussy so bad.” He let go of your head, wiping a drop of his cum from your chin before pushing his finger past your lips. Watching as you sighed in content while sucking every last drop. “It’s too bad that in about one minute those guards are gonna come get you Doc. Our session is over.”

You had no time to question how he knew. Scurrying to redress with widened eyes.

Sukuna may not have had a clock. Nor was he able to distinctly see the sun rise and set. But he’d learned to count the seconds when you were around. He knew how much time he had with you.

“And… now.”

At that very moment the door swung open. Sukuna having easily pulled back up his pants after giving you your seat back. Both of you looking as professional as you possibly could.

“See you tomorrow Doc.” He smiled innocently, watching as you scrambled out while avoiding his eyes.

You really fucked up now.

It was hard to keep him out of your mind before. But now, trying was futile. You’d gotten a taste and you needed more. Which was why your brain would not let you close your eyes without thinking of him fucking you.

—

The next morning you bit back a whimper as your clit was caught between your rubbing thighs. You had worn a tight pencil skirt with no panties. Just for Sukuna.

You were thankful that the guards had complied to your wishes of them leaving.

You wanted to stop yourself. To go back home and forget about the red eyed prisoner. He may not have been dangerous to you physically. But to your heart and mind.. he’d be the death of you.

When the door closed behind you, you found yourself bring pushed roughly into the same wall as last time. Sukuna letting out an animalistic groan as he captured your lips on his. Kissing you so much more feverishly than yesterday.

“You don’t know how much i need you. Didn’t even sleep last night.” He panted, turning you around so that your chest rested against the concrete surface. “Missed you so much Doc.” His voice softened, kissing down your neck while grinding up into you. His fingers finding their way under your skirt with a smirk against your skin. “And i thought you couldn’t get any dirtier.. no panties huh?”

You moaned when he prodded at your already dripping cunt. The thought of him being enough to have gotten you soaked. “Shit- tell me what you want Doc. Let me hear you say it.” He growled lowly, ready to snap the second the words left your mouth.

“Please— please fuck me.”

Sukuna hungrily shoved your skirt up. The fabric bunching at your hips as he freed his aching cock. Both of you letting out a noise of satisfaction when he sunk into you, his large hands holding tightly onto your hips to pull you into him. Your back arching as your hands shot out to the wall for support.

“O-ohh God.” You cried loudly, your lips parted in shaky moans as Sukuna’s cock rammed deep near the entrance of your cervix. His veins grazing at your g spot as the fat girth stretched you to your limit.

“Nah baby, ‘s only me.”

“Kunaa— so goood- ahhh.” Tears pooled in your eyes, Sukuna’s hand reaching into your hair to pull you back into his chest. Your nails clawing at the wall in front of you as he destroyed yours.

“Taking me so fucking well. Shit- pussy’s so damn snug.” He husked, hips snapping noisily into yours as he fucked into your walls mercilessly. Basking in the sounds of your choked screams and mewls. The way you sobbed underneath him when your knees buckled.

He was fucking you so hard and deep. Better than anything you’d felt before. His cock slamming into all the places that would drive you crazy.

“The day you fucking leave me i will break outta here Doc. And i will find you. You’re mine got it?” There was a certain seriousness in his voice that made goosebumps arise on your skin. Your salty tears mixing with your drool as they ran down your flushed face.

“And when i do get outta here you’re gonna have my baby Doc. ‘M gonna fuck you again and again till’ i eventually give you my fuck—ing kid.” His breathing became ragged, your body rocking forward with each of his movements.

He smirked. “I’ve fucked ya this dumb already?” His cock twitching inside you as your body moved with his cock like a fleshlight. Your vision blurred as your head grew light, dizzy. You couldn’t think, every roll of Sukuna’s hips clouding your mind as you let an incoherent babble drip off your tongue. Shakily chanting his name when he reached forward to pinch at your clit.

“Look at you. Look so pretty underneath me like this.” His free hand snaked up to your neck, groaning loudly at the feeling of your heart beat on his skin. Pulling you up so your back rested flat against his broad chest, wandering lips meeting your exposed collarbone. “Let go f’me.”

Your body quivered as you tightened around him. Letting out a whimper-like cry as you came messily on his cock. A breathy moan of his own sounding in your ear when his thrusts began to get sloppy.

“Kunaaa.. inside. Want you inside. ‘M on the pill.” You begged, legs giving way as he held you flush against him.

“Whatever you want, Doc.” Slowly coming to a halt as he buried himself inside your warmth, tongue darting out to lick at your tear stained cheeks. Feeling his cock swell as he pumped you full of his cum. Painted your gummy walls in nothing but white

“Looks like i’m sending you back with my cum dripping down your thighs.” He pulled out with a grin. His cum leaking out of your fluttering cunt in small spurts when he used his hands to knead at the flesh of your ass. “Hottest thing i’ve seen in a while.. after you of course.”

You hummed, eyes shutting as you fell into him. Feeling the thick substance slowly dripping down your legs while spreading over your sticky folds. Sukuna stumbled back onto his bed with you on top of him. Your face nestling into his chest with a soft smile. “Hey Doc.. i love ya but those guards are gon’ be back soon.”

‘So worth it.’ Was the one thought branding itself into your mind as your body registered the rough, lust filled fuck.

“Shit.”

—

You and Sukuna had gotten so much closer over yet another week. You had never believed in falling in love that quickly until now. You couldn’t help it. You felt so much better when he was around. Seeing him was the highlight of your day- especially now that you’d convinced for longer sessions.

He felt the same way. You were the second person he had fallen in love with and somehow even harder. You made his heart.. swell. And he was serious about busting out to start a life with you.

“So, your first love. We never finished talking about her.” You smirked, notepad back in hand as you did your job. Sukuna having been stealing small kisses from you between every question.

“How about we forget about my first love and focus on my current one. You.”

[ariaste]

listen ok so i made some good jokes yesterday about Lestat having an onlyfans but i am back today with a new essay and this one is entitled

Why The Invention Of Social Media Is Going to Permanently Save Loustat's Fucking Marriage

come on this journey with me.

ok so on one hand we have Louis, who does not like to leave the house except when he absolutely fucking has to and even then he resents it. my man wants to be at home with a book 100% of the time and he's so fucking valid for that. When he leaves the house, bad things happen to him. He has learned this and honestly i can't fault his evidence. it sucks out there. it truly incredibly sucks out there.

the problem is that sometimes he is married to lestat, who starts clawing at the walls if people aren't paying attention to him for 12 consecutive seconds, and being Out Of The House is the best place for him to go foraging for People To Pay Attention To Him. my man once had a rock star career the way that some people get addicted to meth brewed in a trashcan in someone's garage. Louis, through no fault of his own, is simply not capable of filling this psychological need no matter how hard he tries, except he should not even HAVE to try like that, because no one can do it, because Lestat is fucked up and like wasn't hugged enough as a child or something

this imbalance in their relationship is the core source of all their marital problems since day 1: THIS man's idea of a good time is chilling on the sofa in silence and maybe staring contemplatively at the wall for a while, and THIS man starts self-destructing at a truly astonishing rate if no one is making eye contact with him. If you make Louis go outside and socialize with people, he's miserable and sulking and whining about "are we done can we go home". If you make Lestat sit in silence in a chair for five minutes he starts crying and claiming that No One Has Ever Loved Him, Ever, Ever, And No One Understands Him, And He Hates Everyone In This House and He Is Being Actively Neglected And Cruelly Mistreated Right Now And No One Even Bothers To Feel Sorry For Him, This Is BASICALLY Domestic Violence Against Him Personally, If Only Anyone Knew About The Quiet Hidden Tragedies Of An Unhappy Marriage, and then he breaks some furniture and a window and isn't seen again for six weeks and comes back like "you will not believe what just happened, i [checks notes] met Merlin and also a dragon who gave me three wishes, brb i'm going to write another book about it :))))"

all you fucking have to do to fix their problems is to hand Lestat a cellphone and say the words "do you know about social media? you can say whatever shit you want and there's always someone awake in some time zone to talk to you." Suddenly Lestat is now very interested in sitting quietly on the couch, Lounging Alluringly and posting thirst traps on instagram and finally getting emotional fulfillment from all the likes and comments of "omg???? omg this is the hottest man alive". he does not have to leave the house anymore to get his attention meth. His yawning abyss of neediness is being fulfilled by having parasocial relationships with millions of strangers online who all think he's sexy and don't have to experience how fucking awful he is up close. he can flirt pointlessly with 200 people at once which is FINALLY ENOUGH FLIRTATIONS FOR HIM TO SATISFACTORILY JUGGLE

Meanwhile Louis is 3 feet away, vaguely reflecting to himself that HE is feeling all emotionally fulfilled because they're spending this great Quality Time together in perfect silence while he reads his book and Lestat plays on his cellular telephone and only OCCASIONALLY giggles to himself or says "louis which of these photos do you think is sexier, the one with four buttons undone or the one with five buttons undone" Louis is feeling like his Opinion is being Valued, Louis feels like he is being Consulted on Matters that are Important To Lestat. He has opinions about the photographs. It is not that much trouble to be interrupted from staring philosophically at the wall to spend five seconds looking at a photograph and then saying "that one". Finally he is experiencing Cozy Domesticity. he is so horny about it. lestat is surprised and bewildered about the sudden sharp increase in the amount of sex he is now getting but before he can make any vaguely mean comments about it (bc he's confused and vaguely defensive and worried that it's going to stop out of nowhere and he doesn't know any other interpersonal skills for expressing a thought) his phone pings about how he's just broken 5 million followers on instagram and he totally forgets to even mention the sex thing, which means that he continues getting the sex instead of inciting an argument about the sex and going through his 800th divorce from Louis

all their friends are extremely confused when a whole month, and then six months, and then a year goes by without another Loud Divorce happening and no one crashing through their front door like "I HAVE TO SLEEP IN YOUR GUEST COFFIN FOR THE NEXT MONTH, HE IS INTOLERABLE". They are worried. they are concerned. what is going on over there. are they both dead. no, they can't both be dead, Lestat just posted another tiktok of him sucking on his own fingers, which he would not be doing if Louis were dead. there is an ecosystem collapse happening in the groupchat and it's because the main Drama Vectors have been neutralized