#I also want to add doctor doom as well

[racefortheironthrone]

What did you think of X-Men Blue Origins?

(I may turn this into a People's History of the Marvel Universe later today, so keep an eye on this space.)

X-Men Blue: Origins and the Power of the Additive Retcon

(WARNING: heavy spoilers under the cut)

Introduction

If you've been a long-time X-Men reader, or you're a listener of Jay & Miles or Cerebrocast or any number of other LGBT+ X-Men podcasts, you probably know the story about how Chris Claremont wrote Mystique and Destiny as a lesbian couple, but had to use obscure verbiage and subtextual coding to get past Jim Shooter's blanket ban on LGBT+ characters in the Marvel Universe.

Likewise, you're probably also familiar with the story that, when Chris Claremont came up with the idea that Raven Darkholme and Kurt Wagner were related (a plot point set up all the way back in Uncanny X-Men #142), he intended that Mystique was Nightcrawler's father, having used her shapeshifting powers to take on a male body and impregnate (her one true love) Irene. This would have moved far beyond subtext - but it proved to be a bridge too far for Marvel editorial, and Claremont was never able to get it past S&P.

This lacuna in the backstories of Kurt and Raven - who was Kurt's father? - would remain one of the enduring mysteries of the X-Men mythos...and if there's one thing that comic writers like, it's filling in these gaps with a retcon.

Enter the Draco

Before I get into the most infamous story in all of X-Men history, I want to talk about retcons a bit. As I've written before:

"As long as there have been comic books, there have been retcons. For all that they have acquired a bad reputation, retcons can be an incredibly useful tool in comics writing and shouldn’t be dismissed out of hand. Done right, retcons can add an enormous amount of depth and breadth to a character, making their worlds far richer than they were before. Instead, I would argue that retcons should be judged on the basis of whether they’re additive (bringing something new to the character by showing us a previously unknown aspect of their lives we never knew existed before) or subtractive (taking away something from the character that had previously been an important part of their identity), and how well those changes suit the character."

For a good example of an additive retcon, I would point to Chris Claremont re-writing Magneto's entire personality by revealing that he was a Jewish survivor of the Holocaust. As I have argued at some length, this transformed Magneto from a Doctor Doom knockoff into a complex and sympathetic character who could now work as a villain, anti-villain, anti-hero, or hero depending on the needs of the story.

For a good example of a subtractive retcon, I would point to...the Draco. If you're not familiar with this story, the TLDR is that it was revealed that Kurt's father was Azazel - an evil ancient mutant with the same powers and the same appearance (albeit color-shifted) as Kurt, who claims to be the devil and is part of a tribe of demonic-looking mutants who were banished to the Brimstone Dimension, and who fathered Nightcrawler as part of a plot to end this banishment.

I don't want to belabor Chuck Austen, because I think that Connor Goldsmith is right about his run actually being a camp cult classic in retrospect. However, I think we both agree that the Draco was a misfire, because of how the retcon undermined Kurt's entire thematic purpose as established in Giant-Size X-Men that Nightcrawler was actually a noble and arguably saintly man who suffered from unjust prejudice due to the random accident that his mutation made him appear to be a demon, and because of how the retcon undermined the centrality of Mystique and Destiny's relationship.

X-Men Blue Origins

This brings us to the Krakoan era. In HOXPOX and X-Men and Inferno, Jonathan Hickman had made Mystique and Destiny a crucial part of the story in a way that they hadn't been in decades: they were the great nemeses of Moira X, they were the force that threatened to burn Krakoa to the ground by revealing the devil's bargain that Xavier had struck with Sinister (and Moira), they were the lens through which the potential futures of Krakoa were explored, and they ultimately reshaped the Quiet Council and the Five in incredibly consequential ways.

This throughline was furthered after Hickman's departure, with Kieron Gillen exploring the backstories of Mystique and Destiny in Immortal X-Men and Sins of Sinister, and both Gillen and Si Spurrier exploring their relationship with Nightcrawler in AXE Judgement Day, Sins of Sinister, Way of X, Legion of X, Nightcrawlers, and Sons of X. One of the threads that wove through the interconnected fabric of these books was an increasing closeness between Kurt and Irene that needed an explanation. Many long-time readers began to anticipate that a retcon about Kurt's parentage was coming - and then we got X-Men Blue: Origins.

In this one issue, Si Spurrier had the difficult assignment of figuring out a way to "fix" the Draco and restore Claremont's intended backstory in a way that was surgical and elegant, that served the character arcs of Kurt, Raven, and Irene, and that dealt with complicated issues of trans and nonbinary representation, lesbian representation, disability representation, and the protean nature of the mutant metaphor. Thanks to help from Charlie Jane Anders and Steve Foxe, I think Spurrier succeeded tremendously.

I don't want to go through the issue beat-by-beat, because you should all read it, but the major retcon is that Mystique turns out to be a near-Omega level shapeshifter, who can rewrite themselves on a molecular level. Raven transformed into a male body and impregnated Irene, using bits of Azazel and many other men's DNA as her "pigments." In addition to being a deeply felt desire on both their parts to have a family together, this was part of Irene's plan to save them both (and the entire world) from Azazel's schemes, a plan that required them to abandon Kurt as a scapegoat-savior (a la Robert Graves' King Jesus), and to have Xavier wipe both their memories.

Now, I'm not the right person to write about what this story means on a representational level; I'll leave it to my LGBT+ colleagues on the Cerebrocast discord and elsewhere to discuss the personal resonances the story had for them.

What I will say, however, is that I thought this issue threaded the needle of all of these competing imperatives very deftly. It "fixed" the Draco without completely negating it, it really deepened and complicated the characters and relationships of both Raven and Irene (by showing that, in a lot of ways, Destiny is the more ruthless and manipulative of the two), and it honored Kurt's core identity as a man of hope and compassion (even if it did put him in a rather thankless ingénue role for much of the book).

It is the very acme of an additive retcon; nothing was lost, everything was gained.

I still think the baby Nightcrawler is just a bad bit, but then again I don't really vibe with Spurrier's comedic stylings.

[panlight]

I just read your post about how easily Bella was able to adjust to vampirism, and do you think it was has something to do with she had already tasted human blood before she turned?

like if we go for the eternal damnation angle, where after you're turned you're supposed to drain the life of the kind you belonged to but that doesn't happen to Bella nor does she suffer through it as she had already tasted Blood and thus had already damned herself therefore making her immune???

I mean I know Smeyer didn't go for that angle but this adds an added layer of depth and darkness to the whole "Eww Bella drank Human Blood and LIKED IT" and " Wow, Bella has adjusted so well to being a vampire" like i feel like it ties the whole thing up in a neat lil bow

I could get behind this! She's already tasted human blood, "screwed her total," as she said, before she even becomes a vampire, and so she's primed for it, she's already doomed. There's no angst because the vampire essence had already taken root. I could also accept that the James bite did something to her, or even the pregnancy had changed her in a way that made the adjustment to vampirism less of a shock to the system.

I still wouldn't love that it was such an easy, non-event though. I don't, personally, feel like becoming a supernatural creature with an insatiable blood thirst is something you can really "mentally prepare" for. Like sure, making the choice beforehand and being informed might take the edge off; it could remove a few of the layers of chaos and fear, and that could help. She's not waking up in a strange world surrounded by strange people like the others were. But it should still be hard. You're still dealing with all-new senses, all-new instincts, all-new painful bloodthirst. "I just thought about it and made up my mind not to eat people!" is such a boring explanation.

And also, for me, the whole thing I found compelling was this sort of impossibly difficult and painful self-denial the Cullens had going on. It's only interesting if it's difficult. Newborn!Carlisle banishing himself to the woods and trying to starve himself for months and then spending centuries perfecting his self-control enough to be a doctor is just WAY more interesting to me than Bella hanging out with her human dad on day 2 of vampirism. Alice wandering alone and trying to make sense of her visions and having only "sporadic success" at not eating people is a hundred times more interesting to me than newborn!Bella dressing up all sexy and going to meet a lawyer. The mental image of Carlisle, Edward, Esme and Rosalie ALL having to tackle newborn!Emmett to try and keep him from eating someone because he's so outrageously strong is way more compelling (and scary! and sad!) than Bella just getting "distracted" by Edward and not eating the hikers. Jasper still struggling with the bad habits he picked up in the vampire wars; Rosalie killing her attackers without spilling a drop of blood because she knew she wouldn't be able to resist that; lovely gentle Esme slipping up and killing people and having to come home to Dr. Perfect Record with red eyes. Edward going on his rebellion because he didn't want to be in pain any more. THAT's the stuff I find compelling, that's the stuff that sucked me into this series.

But totally! At least explain her success with some actual lore. She's already tasted blood, she's already been bitten, she's been somehow changed by the nightmare pregnancy. All of that is better than "mentally prepared." Or at the very very very least really make it clear her success was about her circumstances. It was easier for her because she was informed and supported, not because she's innately magic or unusually self-controlled.

[nekoashiii]

i love ur sagau headcanons omg so like we need a part 2, but what if y/n gets sick and the characters take care of them <33 and the children are also sad bc they can't play w them 😭😭😭

‎ 𓂃 im glad you enjoyed it!

‌

𓍯 Proofreader: @vermillionbun

A not so normal day started with you getting out of bed, sneaking into the kitchen while making sure not to alert those psychotic characters that made a religion based off of you.

Grabbing a glass to drink water, you noticed how much your throat hurts, inhaling air made it worse somehow

"Ugh," groaning you put the glass of water in the microwave, warming it up.

"Your grace, good morning." Kojou Sara walked in the moment she heard noises from the kitchen.

"Good morning to you too Sara", with a weak voice you replied.

"Would you like me to make breakfast for you?", she said, walking toward you.

"Sara please don't come near me, I'm most likely sick, I don't want to transfer my illness to you as well".

Dear archons! You're sick?! And you're standing in the kitchen? "Creator please go and rest!"

"Sara please be qui─"

"DOCTOR BAIZHU COME HERE, HURRY, THE CREATOR IS FEELING HORRIBLE!" Shit. Now you are definitely doomed.

The house was basically shaking with everyone rushing to the kitchen.

"Hey calm down everyone! I'm not dying."

Headcanons:

You just dug your own grave, but oh well.

During your sickness you will not be left alone. Even at night when you want to sleep, someone needs to be there incase something happened.

The kids wanted to come and hug you, comfort you, their creator was feeling ill after all, but since you didn't want them to get sick as well, so they had to watch you while standing behind the doorframe.

On the other hand healers were circling around you like you were a sugar cube and they were ants. They tried their best to bring down your temperature.

﹆

"Can I─ use the blankets now?", you asked while sniffling.

"No is no your grace. End of story, those blankets will just make you feel worse"

"But I'm freezing"

"no"

"Com─"

"Ń̷͉͎͔̣̀̋o̸̡̦̞̩̬͈̊̊̉̃͒̑̓̐͜👹"

...

﹆

While many took it easy about your illness, others were ready to add another death day onto their calenders.

Liyue couldn't deal with another deity's death right after Rex Lapis's passing.

[dinoburger]

But the Moment Just Slipped Through My Hands

submitting to the time honored tradition of Expiration Date fics - slightly Science Party flavoured. I just wanted to put it out there, ik maybe I could stand to sprinkle in more funny speech mannerisms for both Engie and Medic - maybe this will be for another day. I also wanted to illustrate more of it but I could save that for the Ao3 version...

2k words - more focused on Medic and Engie but there's a dash of HeavyMedic in there, not exactly shipping focused

(title is from Gone in an Instant - I hope nobody is keeping track of how many times I reference Black Dresses in various work bc I'm sure it's starting to add up)

-🍞-

The smell of bread had a tendency to float in the air in almost every corner of their current base of operations – fated to be their last, so they assumed – but was even thicker now in the already stuffy laboratory. Slightly more sour than usual too, due to the effects of the teleporter.

After they’d reported their findings to the rest of the team, the resident medic and engineer had hurried back to continue their work, hoping for more answers. It was natural, to both of them, but in the lulls between furiously experimenting, exchanging notes and prompting each other with questions about their respective areas of expertise, Dell found himself staring at the doctor with a pang of guilt.

The medic, as was usual when presented with cataclysmic disaster, confronted it with a mixture of stern determination and delighted morbid curiosity. Regardless, impending doom weighed heavy on the shorter’s shoulders.

“You don’t feel hard-done by, spending your last days cooped up in this here lab?” he scratched his neck, leaning back against the bench’s counter.

“If we had more time, maybe – but this is where I am needed most, ja?” the medic scribbled down several more notes, before he spared the engineer a glance. “What about you?”

“So long as I’m not gettin’ in your way.”

“Oh not at all, not at all.” he shook his head, “Really, it’s unfortunate I could not have gotten to know you better sooner – you have a brilliant mind, Herr Engineer.” the doctor’s lips quirked into a small, earnest smile, which caught Dell off guard.

“Aw shucks, Doc.” he retreated into himself a bit. “Just a shame I weren’t brilliant enough to figure out this whole teleporter mess m’self.”

“Ach, you couldn’t have known” Ludwig waved off, “and besides that, some of the greatest discoveries of our time have come at no small cost. What is it they say…? You can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs.”

It was true that medical science had it’s share of horrors, but even so, the doctor felt his optimism slip.

“I must confess, I might have been a touch… sloppy. You would think if something was wrong, the team doctor would be first to pick up on it." he scolded himself. "I am so grateful for the freedom of being out on the field, pushing the boundaries of science and medicine but I’m afraid I have gotten ahead of myself.”

“Heck, I’d say you’d done a dang good job keepin’ us alive so far - ‘spite some of our best efforts.” Dell grinned, which got a laugh out of Ludwig.

“M’ just wonderin’ if you didn’t have nobody special you wanted to see before you, y’know. Bit the dust, so to speak. I can keep things tickin’ over here just fine for a while.”

“Someone ‘special’…? Oh, don’t tell me.” Ludwig snorted. “Those silly rumours about my supposed ‘wife’ are still floating around.”

“I was a tad curious.”

“I might as well give the game up now, she’s not real – never was. I have no time for such things, but ach, some of our comrades are very nosy. It started off as a simple joke to keep them off my back, I didn’t think it would stick, so I never bothered to refute it.”

“I getcha, that makes a hell’ve a lot more sense.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” the man tensed, the amused glint in his eyes exchanged for something sharper and wary.

“Well, when the fellas get gossipin’ about the lady-folk, you never have a whole lot t’ say. Figured if you really did have a spouse waitin’ on ya you’d be more eager to brag.” Dell observed casually.

The doctor released a breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding. “Ah, is that all?”

“Y’know I’m not one to pry, doc. I respect ya too much.”

“Much appreciated.”

Dell paused, picking his next words more carefully. “More surprised you didn’t wanna say your goodbyes to that big fella – two of you seem mighty companionable.”

“Herr Heavy, I assume? We do work closely together, but... it’s hard to say we’re much more than colleagues.”

“You kiddin’? The man’s crazy ‘bout ya – you should see how he lights up the moment he lays eyes on ya. ‘S really somethin’ else.” Dell risked a smile and a sideways glance, the doctor’s face going soft with fondness.

“Well… I suppose I owe it to him to see if I can work this out in time.”

The engineer’s throat seized, his playful smile fading. He’d almost forgotten what the stakes were here.

For the next few minutes, Dell put his head down and worked in solemn silence, the guilt crushing his lungs and forbidding him to talk. He would only will himself to when the doctor had another question, they needed to deliberate their next course of action or sort out notes between each other.

When they’d worked into another lull in their rhythm, the taller of the two eyed up the other.

“...You didn’t have anyone you wanted to see before we expire?” The doctor returned the question.

The engineer shook his head, still half buried in a toolbox. “Nope. Wouldn’t’ve signed up t’ be a mercenary if I did, all part ‘n parcel." he took a breath, considering just biting his tongue again, but somehow leaving Ludwig in the dark felt worse. "Those Mann brothers found me through m’ grandpa, us Conaghers’ve been workin’ with ‘em for decades.”

“Really now?” Doctor Ludwig’s eyebrows twitched up, this was news to him.

Dell knew deep down he wasn’t supposed to talk about this, as mercenaries they were all on a need-to-know basis, but with how the situation was unfolding he found the words spilling out with ease.

“Uh-huh. Lotta his work was kept under lock and key though, up until I joined their employ. Though I can't say I agree with how they got 'em to begin with... it feels like I get ta take part in my heritage, going over his blueprints, studying his notes – like I’m really steppin’ into his shoes ‘n followin’ his footsteps.” the softer, reverent tone he’d taken petered out into a sigh. “I was hopin’ I’d be able t’ finish what he’d started, put an end to this gravel war. Looks like there’ll have to be another generation of recruits after us.”

“It’s still just a job, mein friend, you make of it what you can – and I would say you have gotten more out of it than most would.” the doctor added.

“It ain’t just a job to me.” Dell’s idle tinkering stopped, head hung. “I got all these ideas in my head that I could make it mean somethin', I'd shake things up, I'd make it count - buncha fanciful nonsense." his words took on a harsher edge as he wound himself up.

Doctor Ludwig found himself pausing too, observing the other’s hunched shoulders and arms stiffly gripping the bench.

“What kinda legacy am I leavin’? Maybe I’m just daydreaming, thinkin’ I’m half the man Radigan was. Would he really’ve made a mistake this darn stupid? Doomed all’a his men like this? The hell do I think I’m doin’ out here?” he spat, cursing himself.

Part of him had always known, every force was met with equal resistance, wins and losses balanced themselves out. The RED and BLU mercenaries were nothing but cogs in a much larger machine, to ends he couldn’t fathom.

He kept glaring down at the counter through his goggles, as if raising his head would reveal a great, dark vortex hanging above, deeper than he could possibly see, filled with terrible, grinding machinery. It would use them all up like fuel and spit them out into the ether.

“To hell with legacy.”

Doctor Ludwig broke the tangible silence that had fallen.

“To hell with the Mann brothers, to hell with your grandfather.”

The Conagher bristled and turned on him, mouth twisted into an offended snarl, posture like a coiled spring. “Beg yer pardon?”

“We cannot dictate what the tides of time will choose to spare.” the doctor’s expression was equally grave. “So I say to hell with them all. Your work is worthy, because your life is worthy.” he clamped his hands over either of the engineer’s shoulders, taking the man by surprise.

“I don’t care what kind of man this Radigan Conagher was, I am honoured to have spent this life with his grandson.”

That sent his head spinning.

Dell choked, not sure if he was about to cry or laugh, a shaky grin spread across his features and a wheeze escaped his teeth.

“’P-preciate it, Doc.” he sniffed, flushed with the threat of tears.

Ludwig gave his shoulders a reassuring squeeze before he released him, the tension melting out of the room. “Of course, let’s get back to it, shall we?”

The engineer nodded, turning from him again to regain composure. He pried the goggles up from his eyes just enough to rub the haze from them before returning them to position.

-

Hours bled into a blur, the self-assurance of being able to power through it to the end was starting to crumble. Dell could hardly see straight, neither man had slept since their initial discovery. He’d been the first to give out, going from using the lab bench to prop himself up to sinking entirely onto the cold, concrete floor in a heap. He peeled back his goggles, feeling the grooves across his nose and cheeks from being stuck to his face for so long – no doubt angry red marks by now, he imagined.

The stink of sour bread was getting to him, suffocating, he wanted nothing more than to lay down and let his senses slip away into unconsciousness.

He vacantly stared up at the doctor, who he wasn’t sure was still engaged in their research or just playing with chunks of bread.

Without thinking, he watched the man bring the piece he was holding to his mouth and bit down. He spluttered and spat it back out at once.

“What was the point o’ that?” the engineer snickered.

Ludwig mumbled incoherently, before shrugging, too bleary to come up with a good excuse.

“Surprised you can even tolerate the stuff at this rate, it reeks in here.”

“Ja, well…” the doctor interrupted himself with a groan as he joined the engineer on the floor, joints protesting his descent. “I have smelt a lot worse – try working with corpses and animals for hours on end. Or animal corpses, for that matter.”

Dell shuddered. “No thanks, partner.”

At least Ludwig found his disgust amusing.

It was strange being able to see the other’s face unobscured, the medic had gotten used to thinking of Dell as something vaguely insectoid with those large dark lenses. There were in fact, some pretty impressive red indents on his skin where the googles had been and a tan line to match.

“I jus… need a moment…” he huffed, letting his lids fall closed.

Doctor Ludwig murmured a faint agreement, tucking his own glasses into the pocket of his coat and slumping back against the bench on his side of the laboratory.

“...Doc?”

“Mm?”

“Y’ain’t… scared of disappearin’? Being forgotten?”

“Terrified. But it’s out of my hands.” his lips stayed parted as he chewed it over, consciousness swaying. “I can’t control what I will be remembered for. I can hope that my work will mean something in the face of humanity… that it will not simply be discarded as madness, but I cannot know. At least I can say I never limited myself, that I always… always sought for answers.”

"'S like y' said... if they can't see what it's worth then maybe humanity don't deserve it."

The doctor only hummed in response.

There was something painfully human in his sprawled out form that Dell had never quite seen before, peering out between heavy eyelids. He traced Doctor Ludwig’s sunken cheekbones in his mind, the dark lashes of closed eyes, brow relaxed – neither forming the serious scowl he was used to nor contorted in manic glee, a view clear of the usual thin frames that adorned his nose. He was used to having to peer up at him, with his line of sight only reaching the doctor’s chest.

He wanted to take that image to the ends of the earth, for what time he had left and what consciousness his exhausted mind would allow him.

Glad that the light in the lab was already dim, the engineer shifted to lie down, hissing when his helmet smacked the concrete – he’d forgotten he’d still been wearing it. He fumbled to get it off, not noticing the doctor too shifting to slide out of his coat.

“Here, support your head with this.”

“Huh? Oh, thank ya kindly.” Dell absently took the folded fabric while propped up on his elbows, shimmying to position himself just right.

He also took the opportunity to unfasten his prosthetic to set aside, along with his belt.

“Hey Doc… lemme return the favour.”

Medic squinted.

“I got a pillow y’ can use.” the engineer patted his belly with his remaining hand. “C’mere.”

He didn’t need any further prompting, the taller crawled over and flopped back against him. “Oof, my back is going to hate me for this.” he grumbled. “If you wake first, wake me up too.”

Comfortable wasn’t the right word. Nothing about how the cold floor seeped through the back of his clothes and the skin of his arms was particularly comfortable, even the way the medic rested his weight on his stomach was a little stifling, but he wouldn’t have dared to move.

He could smell the doctor’s scent in the coat tucked under his head, feel the gentle rhythm of his breath, hear the way it stirred in his chest.

“Let’s just stay like this, until the end. Hold me until it’s all over.” Dell wanted to plead.

“Copy that.”

[tsunbunni]

It's been a long time since I posted Cieladd ( maybe 2 weeks? 1 month?), and so today it is the same. So I think about doing something special about today. I'm going to quest myself about Cieladd (more about myself ) and answer it. If you don't like reading then just skip it. But if you read it then I welcome you.

When did I grad myself into this ship? This is when Ciel and Lu got leak and announced in the game. I only ship them for fun because of how good-looking Ciel is and how I love Add so much (at that time, I'm AddEve fan lmaoo). But when I got to know Ciel's personality, habits, and even his past. I've become more deep into this ship.

Reson why I'm shipping Cieladd? Because they have a surprising similarity, and I don't think anyone can understand the suffering they went through, except them. For how Ciel and Add both lost their dear family (Ciel's sister/Add's mother), when they got new friend but end up losing them too, and how when they got into the revenge stuff (of course Ciel's revenge is done, but not Add). So when I think about if they become friend and Add just feel safe around Ciel, and then begin to tell him a few about himself to Ciel, Ciel might feel the connection between them and try to help Add out of his madness ( which I assume is in their's class 1, their both being inspire by each other or try to become stronger than the other)

Which class couple I like the most? Of course, class 3, Demonio and DE is my favorite. Oh how I love sad boy and mad boy. I always know that in which class, Ciel always thinks Add is the good person, even if this little boy is just up to something weird again, he is so nice and warm heart to cares about others ( Lu first and then the other, but Lu just can protect herself well and play around with someone in the El's team). How can he not care about the boy, who is likely more into something else than his own health. And more more but might too long to write it down.

Do I don't like the other couple in Cieladd? No! of course not! Class 1 is fun, because they just want to competition each other but in the cool way. I like how baby PT (add) admire big brother Ciel and become strong LP (and got Deadlord praise and both pratice with each other). And how cute DL keep miss baby PT and how end up Doom appear to have hair hide his right eye again and a fur coat. Absysser didn't know that Doom is that kind of jelous man, even if that it his younger self (how cute~Abysser loves Doom more and more after that) Class 2, RG (ciel) is care about MM (add), MM keep work and work and work! RG can't allow this baby to keep losing weight anymore. MM only let RG take care of him (because brother Ciel give him lot of cookies when their are basic class). There are grow up lover, or maybe old married couple? and damn Lu don't like sharing her dear (brother/bulter) with someone, but it's fun and their have set thing done in the end. Class 4 is still new to me and I haven't get to know well about them both. But I like to think that Add being a doctor and take care of Ciel depression. The change of who being the healer and who is being heal.

How long I can keep loving Cieladd? I don't know but I already into this ship more than 7 years now, I think I can keep going another more years? kekeke~ But I don't promise about the time I might post my arts, because I have things in my life too (and how I really depress too or scare of the unknow and lock myself up, nah~kidding).

Will I keep this blog ? Yes, this is my cieladd home, my first blog and the big step in social media (I was so scare of people and avoid communication with other). This blog is precious to me and Cieladd memories too. There some are happy when the first time I got a fan, having a lot of like and some reblog, the courage to open ask and answer some. There also sad one when I sad of how people doesn't like Cieladd, how I run away for few years unpost and hide myself, how I blame myself for being coward, making excuse,... But this is how I slowly level up myself. Looking back make my heart feel like warm and so glad that I didn't let thing end just like that.

Anything else to said? (I'm out of question to myself now =v= damn) Cieladd is love! Cieladd is life!!!! I don't care that I can't play the game (free player is hard) but Cieladd is still the best to me! Not only the reason I'm shipping them, but also the energy their give to me so that finally make this blog and bring love to people how strugger to find hope in crack ship that being hate for no reason (yes, everyone have to right to ship what they want. You don't like it then skip, pass, block,... don't talk harsh things ) Well, I don't want to keep people hope in this blog and I don't like keep my fan wait. I hope that you can find time and check my arts or forget about this home if you want (the game is old and not really famous tbh) I will always happy to welcome you to my cieladd home, thank anyone that keep support me and following me until now, you're all the best gift in my life, i love you all like i love cieladd. I won't be sad now, and will be back with Cieladd stuff, AU or random things like I used to. Thank you again, who read this until now (or none)

[princessofxianle]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

well THANK YOU for asking, you are the first to!

tbh ive been meaning to do this on my main blog bc I take these wayyy too seriously lol but ANYWAY heres my top 10 faves (in no particular order) that I can think of (tbh theres prob more i forgot about, or i wanted to keep only 1 per fandom... except tgcf)

Huge Spoiler Warning: for ALL of tgcf, 2ha, aot, AND JJK MANGA!!!

1. Feng Xin (tgcf)

do i even need to explain this one? loyal to a fault, just a cute lil puppy, one hell of a sculpted archers back, and he's head over heels in love with Xie Lian (but tbh same) i have a lot of thoughts about him on a daily basis on this blog (and also theres the #fx backstory au tag)

2. Noé Archiviste (the Case Study of Vanitas)

MY BABY

the absolute bestest boy of EVER... with a LOAD of unprocessed trauma (yknow the typical stuff like seeing your childhood bff get decapitated in front of you) and a lot more to come once we find out how he kills his boyfriend best friend, Vanitas...

i ALSO think about him a lot but over on @noes-pillow

3. Sejanus Plinth (The Hunger Games: tbosas)

hated reading as a child... HATED it... picked up the og trilogy when i was 12 and i was a goner. The funny thing is i still hated reading for YEARS up until i picked up the prequel novel then in 2020, and now ive read all of tgcf, 2ha, and more fanfic than i could ever imagine... all because this stupid boy (i love him) chose to trust the WORST person as his friend, rip sejanus my baby

the movie is v good btw, if you havent seen it you should

4. Xie Lian (tgcf)

*Taizi Dianxia Fang Xin Guoshi General Hua Xie Lian*

how this man survived 800 years of being physically unable to die and never went insane is a mystery i will never be able to fully comprehend (aaand im in love with him... hmm i wonder why...)

5. Mihael "Mello" Keehl (Death Note)

the chocolate-addicted blonde boi that was my first anime crush... by proxy I must also add Mail "Matt" Jeevas because they are a package deal

these two are also the reason i started writing fanfic so they will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart

6. Xue Meng - (2ha)

*sigh* he's just everyone's fav peacock (yes technically the image is XM 0.5 but he had a cool ass bird so im using this photo bc its COOL anyway...) mengmeng is another one of my trauma bois who has lost next to everything and yet is STILL kicking ass and taking names #thatsmyfuckingsectleader so proud of you my son

also this might get me into hot water here but imma go ahead and say it...

this is what i wanted Jiang Cheng to be... (i LOVE my angy grape but...) through thick and thin, despite EVERYTHING, and even mo ran fucking abandoning him he will still call mo ran his "ge"...

fgjhdfhfdg THEYRE BROTHERS, OKAY???

7. Howl Pendragon (Howl's Moving Castle)

ok this one i just simply do not need to explain... if you think i do, go watch this whole movie and then there ya go thats your answer...

GENDER

8. River Song (Doctor Who)

aside from being the character that unlocked my unhealthy obsession with :) Main Character Death :) at the ripe ol' age of 8 YEARS (although Will Turner from POTC also helped on that front... Orlando Bloom my beloved) River's story was a stroke of absolute GENIUS from start to finish and i simply love how Alex Kingston played her...

"You don't expect a sunset to admire you back."

I just love the doomed ones, okay...

9. Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)

look... theres *gojo girlies* uwu and then theres GOJO GIRLIES... i couldn't give 2 shits about how he's fan-serviced (tho im not complaining) but have you SEEN the amount of grief pumped into that man? he could explode in a fit of fucking insanity at literally any moment and take the whole goddamn world down with him bc what happened with suguru WASNT FAIR to him and satoru has more than enough power to go apeshit... but he DOESN'T... even after losing so many of his co-sorcerers... he still puts on a brave face to the end in order to protect the childhood of his students even tho his own youth was stolen from him during hidden inventory...

SEE? The DOOMED ones!

10. Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan)

i read the manga during my last year of uni and when i tell you i SOBBED at the end... yes ofc for obvious reasons, but mostly bc my little Levi loses EVERYTHING. He is the SOLE survivor of the veteran scouts. He's missing multiple fingers, an eye, and the ability to walk. He was the strongest (yowaimo) but wasn't even granted the mercy to die at the end of his narrative! Broke my fucking heart.

BONUS: Morph (Treasure Planet)

he's a morph!!! nuff said <3

fin

[blackfox0taku]

[PG 1]

[PG 2]

Shadow: "Rather reckless of you to just walk up to me like that don't you think, doctor?"

[PG 3]

Eggman: "I'm not here to come and cause any trouble, Shadow. I'm just here to pay my respects. After all they were my family too." Shadow: "Since when has stuff about family ever matters to you?"

Eggman: ".. Well, I just found it curious. I don't know much about my grandfather, I figured that someone who has access in the GUN records might tell me. So, I would like to ask. What was my grandfather like, Shadow?

[PG 4]

Shadow: Throughout all the records in the GUN archives could gather about him and the Ark. If had to describe your grandfather in one word. It was Ambitious. He was a man who spent his life on his research. A world-renowned scientist who was widely acknowledged as one of the greatest scientific minds of all time. But to him it seemed it didn't matter as he would keep pushing for more knowledge. As he discovered the secrets of the mystic ruins. The creation of the Bio Lizard and the Eclipse Canon. Even having to make contact with out worldly beings like Black Doom in order further his research.

[PG 5]

Shadow: All for the sake of one person.

[PG 6]

Shadow: "To be honest. If he really wanted to, the professor could have taken over the entire world."

Dr. Eggman: "Ahaha, of course he could. After all he is a Robotnik. Brilliance just seerms to run in our blood"

Shadow: "I would also like to add that he was very humbled!"

Metal Sonic: "Doctor."

Shadow and Eggman: "hmm?"

Eggman: "Ah, Metal Sonic and Sage you brought the flowers I requested."

[PG 7]

Eggman:" Now, now, you two. No need to start anything. Metal, Shadow and were just talking. No need to protect me, right?"

Shadow: "Hmph. I'm off duty today. So l have no priority in taking you in."

Eggman: "Oh..."

Sage: "Father. Metal Sonic and have gathered the flowers you requested. Are these lovely flowers adequate?"

Eggman: "They are indeed. Well done Sage and Metal."

[PG 8]

Shadow: "Father? Care to fill in some context, doctor?"

Eggman: "It's a long story. Anyway, I must thank you, Shadow. As a child, looked up to my grandfather. Because of all the great things he accomplished in his life. He was my hero, and wanted to be a great scientist like him. It's part of the reason why am driven to make the Eggman Empire. To carry on the Robotnik legacy. I can only hope to achieve capturing a small percentage of his greatness... Anyway, I believe that's enough chit chat. I have to go back and make plans on accomplishing for world domination. Farewell."

Shadow: "Hmph..."

[PG 9]

Shadow: " You seem to have captured more of him than you realize, doctor."

Mangaka note: This short story was something that I believe could happen if delved into. As the connection between Shadow and Eggman hasn't been really dived into throughout the series. Let alone the similarities that Shadow shares with Metal Sonic. As Metal Sonic is Eggman's ultimate creation, while Shadow was professor Gerald's. This manga was fun to make and I hope you enjoyed reading.

[addcests]

deflection :: ao3 mirror

pairing the addcest is there if you believe

words 3619

rating [G]

summary deflection (verb) to cause a piece to move to a less suitable square. typically used in the context of a combination or attack, where the deflected piece is critical to the defense.

note: this fic was literally made out of madness thanks to a tiktok video: https://www.tiktok.com/@julianphilosophy/video/7349654120619330847 (around 1:03 but the whole video in general is good) me at 3am seeing this vid again later: me: yeah so what if dom said this to om and that's it that's how the fic was made! but when i started it i thought also "let's add in chess" because why not that's fun right and then instead of finishing it in one day like i meant to, i went "well what if i Actually map out a legit chess game/tactic for them and use it in the fic" and then that's how this became a chess fic with a chess tag (???) anyway i just wanted to make dom knock om down a peg just a smidge 🤏🏽 this isn't quite the dom bullying om i have in mind usually but after turning into a small character study for me, it sure itched that scratched for me :3c hope ya'll enjoy it too

Overmind was an… adjustment, for lack of better words.

Dominator’s other long-time roommates had had their opinions after a few exchanges with the younger man. 

Paradox claimed he found him amusing for numerous reasons; reasons that he apparently didn’t feel privy to share, so as always it was an enigma with that one. Though he feigned his disinterest, he could see Paradox’s droopy eyes stalking Overmind’s excessive yet eloquent chattering through the halls as if he could learn everything he needed to know about the doctor just by picking at each and every word that was constructed. (And maybe he could; Paradox was uncannily precise about his observations when he bothered to be.)

And then there was Doom Bringer. Doom Bringer, too, kept to himself about his opinions, like Paradox initially but that in itself was much unlike the forthcoming man. The brawler was quiet and didn’t offer much when asked, only hummed low to himself. Eventually, though, he caved and mumbled, “... well, don’t be mad,” which was followed up by, “you want my honest thoughts? He’s like your mirror, or somethin’.” But Dominator knew better. Knew that Psyker knew him better (and best, he thought rather smugly), so of course he didn’t need to be mad. Not when he knew Doom Bringer had more to say as he pressed on to add, “Like a mirror… but something is off, ya know?” Doom Bringer hummed to himself. “And of course, I don’t mean it physically. Obviously not. But you have to admit it’s there right? But,” Again, Doom Bringer struggled but finally found just the words he needed, “something is awfully manufactured about him.”

—-

They all had their own ways about interacting with the new addition to their household and he settled in rather well despite initial sentiments, being quite amicable and doing his best to get along and to get on everyone’s best side. He’d made some sort of bargain with Psyker about studying alongside him, in return he got to use him as literal data. Meanwhile, Paradox had sunk his claws into Overmind, shadowing him and poking and prodding at the man but Overmind took it with great stride and soon found himself a semi-permanent resident in his own quarters. (“He insists it is most comfortable in my bed,” Overmind had said, smiling through it with a helpless shrug of his shoulder.) It was almost a seamless transition, as if he had been here all along.

So that was how he often found himself, along with a chessboard, and Overmind regarding him with a kind smile on the opposing side as if they’d done so each day, like years old friends.

“I do so enjoy a small game of intellect to stimulate the mind and gaze into one’s daily motivations. What better way than this to understand one another?” 

Dominator could not agree more.

“I must admit,” Dominator began, returning Overmind’s smile as he set up the board, “I fear I may be slightly rusty. After all, it’s rather hard to wrangle Paradox into a game from start to finish and Psyker would sooner do his silly little training or workouts instead.”

“Ah, I understand. Though, perhaps we could change their minds? With my eloquent words, and you by my side, our combined might will be more than enough to convince them ” He chuckled at his own playful suggestion, eyes following the scientist’s careful and methodical movements as he finished setting up his side of the board, holding the black pieces. “Besides that, there’s no need for fear. After all, this is just a simple, ah… friendly game between housemates.”

“... of course,” Dominator replied rather slowly, starting on his marble white pieces. “And, there. We are all set.” Suddenly, a hand was thrust into his field of view and he followed the motion up to find Overmind holding his hand out—a handshake. For but a split second, Dominator only regarded his hand without doing anything, but in good nature, took his hand in his and shook it. 

“Best of luck,” Overmind mused while shaking his hand still. Before Dominator could reply, he hurriedly added, “If it’s not too presumptuous of me, I feel it fair that the first move be yours, Dominator.” When Dominator did not reply, the doctor continued, “ah, due to your fear of… being rusty was it?” And then, he smiled a little too kindly, lips curled in telling amusement that Dominator knew wasn't from the kindness of his heart.

Inwardly, the scientist scoffed at this roundabout way to downplay his skills.

Still, he was rather tickled by the offer as Dominator’s gloved hand muted back his own laugh, a fist to his mouth. He was not one to turn down a leg up on an opponent, friendly or not. “How generous,” he cooed, as he started his opening move. Standard pawn placement. “I shall make the best of it then.”

They exchanged a few turns, settling into the game as they set up their pawns’ planned placements. Eventually, they fell into a steady rhythm and found that they were going through the motions of playing rather naturally, so much so that they ended up playing more than just the one game. By game three, each had snagged a victory from the other. Currently, it was anyone’s game, however Dominator noticed that Overmind took to… being quite talkative throughout his matches while nudging pieces to their doomsday, sacrificing pieces left and right as long as it netted him the win or a good exchange. 

“Have you had much of a run-in with Ciel—ah, I mean Abysser by any chance? I, too, played a friendly game with him and it cost the butler his beloved daggers.” Overmind’s ever stretched smile remained on his face, though the kindness there seemed to disappear as he recounted this tale. “He may have had a knack for games and the like, but there’s nothing that can quite trump efficient strategy and planning.”

Dominator regarded Overmind then turned his attention back to the game, noticing that again, Overmind was sacrificing pawns. If he did not want to use them to make more powerful pieces towards the endgame, then who was he to complain? The scientist added yet another of the black pawns to his capture. “I don’t imagine he’d let that slide so easily.”

“Of course not, but he’d lost.” Overmind practically bragged, then reeled back in his composure as he assessed the playing field and took Dominator’s bishop. With his index and thumb, he lifted the defeated piece from the board into the air, dangling it like some play thing. “But in lieu of his daggers, well, let’s just say he would rather owe me a favor now instead.” Pure delight burst across Overmind’s face as he laughed. Most likely at his own cunningness and triumphing over the lord demon butler. 

They’d moved onto yet another game. (Dominator was starting to lose count.) Dominator was backed into a corner but he took it with great stride.

But of course Overmind had a spiel he just couldn’t go without saying. “My, Dominator, I think you do yourself a great disservice. After all… I’d say you were more competent than that butler… vastly so, one might even say.”

Was that supposed to be a compliment? If it weren’t for that smile that was grating the scientist’s nerves, he’d almost believe his counterpart. 

Barely.

(Was this how Psyker felt when Dominator tried to compliment him, always complaining about his delivery? He’d need to sorely rectify that.)

The flow of the games continued, despite Dominator slowly coming to realize that Overmind’s welcoming appearance was all but a lie, disserviced due to the underhanded observations and backhanded prods at his expense, he was still enjoying himself. It’s not that Psyker or Paradox couldn’t go head to head with him, but it was rare to get more than two games out of either pair. He just wished Overmind did not… run that mouth of his so much.

(Was this also what Psyker felt like when Dominator accidentally slipped into one of his many monologues? At least his tone didn’t make him want to snap back at him!)

Their conversation landed on many topics, this time though, Dominator led the topic as Overmind was too busy trying to run himself out of an unfavored position. “I heard you study with Psyker sometimes, perhaps we could collaborate too? Though my work lies mostly in my automations and devices, I think there could be a great benefit for us both.” Again, Overmind claimed victory, putting him in the lead with wins, securing four victories to Dominator’s three. They agreed to one more final game.

And though they were near equals in the game, the upturned chin and cocky way Overmind sat, knees wide apart, one hand poised carefully on his armrest while the other toyed with one of the many pieces he had captured from the end of their game, a white queen. “Truly?” The way Overmind had asked was not one of sincerity, not to mention the way he’d not respectfully hold eye contact with Dominator any longer but instead directed all his attention to the dangling, helpless, captured queen between his fingers just proved that the doctor’s true colors were finally revealing itself. “I think not. Not to decline such a… gift, I find your method a little lacking for my tastes.” Finally, he turned his gaze back to Dominator, “Machines can be wonderful tools, you see. However, they’re limited, much like these pawns here.” And Overmind made a grand gesture to the board that’d been refreshed for their final showdown. “They serve their purpose and then beyond that there’s nothing else to them.” Overmind opened, moving first, he set his black pawn two spaces to f3. 

Despite the obvious figurative slap to the face, Dominator still said nothing other than, “Well, that makes sense, I suppose. The way you recklessly sacrifice your pawns.”

“Is it reckless or just using the weak to serve my purpose for something better, for something stronger?” 

Dominator nudged his white pawn one space out, unlike Overmind, to e5. “I think that your tools are what you make of them and that is their limit, much like the pawn who has very little to offer at first glance but can be a critical piece to defend, capture, or force the hand of your opponent.” 

Overmind insisted on shoving his pawns into the field, opening a possible slot for his black bishop to move. His just moved pawn now sits at g4. He also insisted, with an incessant bite to it, “There are better tools at your disposal, Dominator. Be serious now.” 

The scientist saw the opening and sighed, not at Overmind, but to himself. Despite the matches being Overmind taking jabs at him through carefully layered words with his intent hidden, Dominator understood now, and smiled rather fondly. 

“What are you smiling at?”

“I’m rather happy we got to play as we did; you were right, this is a great game to reveal things about oneself. You see, I’ve learned a great deal and,” and Dominator moved his queen to h4, effectively shutting down any further plays for Overmind. It was over. “Checkmate, or as they say, Fool’s Mate.” 

“It—you!?” He snapped forward, fist slamming on his armrest as he leaned over the board to see indeed that his king was trapped by the very same pawns he’d mocked earlier as well as the bishop he so favored to move prior to his defeat. “In four turns?!” Overmind was clearly fuming to be bested in such an embarrassingly short amount of turns. Then, it was as if he suddenly remembered himself, he composed himself, reigning those nasty emotions and his outbursts, that mask sliding over the clear cut irritation that flashed in eyes mere seconds ago like a perfectly fit glove. “... I must say. I’m quite hurt, Dominator. You lied to me. You were not rusty at all, were you?” 

“And what of your constant lies to me throughout the game as well as all the backhanded remarks on my behalf and otherwise, hmm? All those pretty words, all those carefully constructed reflections, all that fluff just for your ego, hmm?”

“I—have no idea what you mean, Dominator, if I offended then I—”

Whatever else Overmind had planned to say, Dominator was no longer interested in those lips wagging any more bold faced lies so plainly to his face. So he sought to correct that. Reaching out, he yanked Overmind over the table by the end of his tie; it wasn’t a rough gesture. Just enough to jostle the younger man forward enough so they could meet face to face without that obvious attempt to deflect any longer. And the action had Dominator’s desired reaction: he now had Overmind’s full attention. (And if Overmind’s face was a little more tinged with color than a few seconds ago, well, he wouldn’t tell anyone.) 

“Much like your pawns that fell prey to my deflects, you are in quite the critical position with no defense in sight. And much like your king, you are right where I want you. So, I think you will listen to what I have to say now. As the Overmind a few seconds ago, not the doctor so insistent on hiding behind fluffy words to protect himself so desperately.”

To that, Overmind for once had nothing to say, still straining over the board as Dominator held his tie.

Satisfied with his control and demands being met willingly or not, Dominator allowed his lips to quirk up into the tiniest of smiles. He then released Overmind to retreat as he may, or stay hovering close; it bothered the scientist not.

With gentle care that contrasted his actions mere seconds ago, Dominator turned his gaze back to the board, where only four pieces were out of position for an early checkmate. He began to slowly reposition each piece back to its original base. When his hand brushed across his black pawns, the one further out on the board, he offered his thoughts to Overmind finally, “You called the pawns weak, if my humble memory serves me right.” Unlike Overmind, Dominator picked up the pawn in a tentative manner, not dangling it by its head like some bored child. He held it in his palm at its base, eyes focused on the black chess piece. “And yet, it was because you were so intent on throwing away the pawns, so quick to dismiss something because it seems weak that this line of thinking ultimately led to your downfall.”

He continued, “Perhaps my little trinkets and toys are just that, and yet I dominate them with a sheer willpower unlike anything you’ve seen. They are, by extension, a part of me as much as I am them. If something is weak, then I will expand upon it, make it better, make the best use of it. It is only as weak as I allow it to be. And even something as weak as a tiny an insignificant drone has its uses that you’d be remiss to overlook. Each cog has its proper place in a well-oiled machine.” He closed his fist over the pawn, obscuring it from sight. “Just because it is weak, Overmind, does not mean we can simply deem it worthless. Calling your tools weak and weeding out that which does not serve you is not true strength.”

Without waiting for any response from the doctor, Dominator reached over, rolling his eyes playfully at the other flinching, and grabbed a similar gloved hand and opened it. Then, he placed the object into Overmind’s hand.

No longer flinching, Overmind opened his eyes to see Dominator’s gloved hand covering his own closed fist. Once he retracted it, warily, he eyed the scientist then his hand and opened his palm to reveal two pawns, a black and white one. 

“If you keep discarding things that do not benefit you on the surface level, you will find that you’re the one that is weak.” Dominator stood up leisurely, moving from his side to stand beside the still seated Overmind, watching as he followed his eyes movements. “The idea that strength is dominating others is a weak man’s idea of strength. True strength is when you can dominate yourself—authority is always silent. Authority is always composed.” And with the conviction behind his words, with all the determination he could command, he locked gazes with Overmind’s eyes, able to see a flicker of his true self deep down, past the facade and performance he played for him today. 

Still, Dominator continued, “If you truly are as powerful and as strong as you say, why must you make such noise about it? You fussed endlessly,  as if you seem a little insecure and unsure but needed to flaunt this anyway to me.” Too kindly, Dominator smiled as if he understood everything about Overmind, “Do you wish for my validation that badly?”

“You—!” Overmind finally had enough as he abruptly stood up, fists clenched, chair screeching back a horrid noise but doing little else. 

Unlike Overmind’s belittling chuckles, Dominator just laughed with an unfounded fondness that bewildered the doctor, face taking on many expressions as if he was unsure to settle on which. “Apologies, I felt that I was allowed a little monologue of my own while being frank as well after what I had endured in those many games.” He nodded his head towards Overmind, then looked him over, noticing his tense stance. “Anyway, my offer still stands.”

At that, the longer hair male paused, as if he was even more confused by the abrupt change in topics once more. His posture relaxed but not out of calmness, but rather being dumbfounded. Dominator could literally see the question marks floating above his head, Overmind clearly flabbergasted.

“I mean, if you would like, my lab will be open to you.”

“I—you are so!” Overmind tsked to himself and then balled his fists by his side, the color back on his cheeks. “The nerve!” Without another word, he stalked off, leaving Dominator and the chessboard behind.

—-

“Eh, so that’s how it went, huh?”

“Perhaps, I was a little too harsh on him.”

“Iunno, I wasn’t there,” Doom Bringer yawned rather loudly through the earpiece Dominator was currently wearing. “But, he's fine. Just give him time t’ cool off, ya?”

Disgusted by his blatant rudeness, the scientist had been about to reprimand the brawler for his gross lack of etiquette when he received a notification via Apocalypse of one of their housemates wandering into his lab, having just gone through the entryway. “Hmm?”

“Visitor, eh?” After hearing the alert himself, Doom Bringer asked a little too knowingly, as he could see his other half was distracted and soon enough would have his hands full. “I’ll let you get that then,” and the brawler promptly ended the call.

Dominator swore he heard a muffled snicker before the line dropped.

“Dominator?”

And all too quickly, he understood why Psyker rushed off the call. Though, he was of the opinion that he needn’t hang up. After all, he had nothing to hide unlike the one that was approaching him now. “Overmind,” the scientist greeted cordially, whirling his seat around to face this visitor. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

At first, it seemed like the doctor was hesitant to talk. That bafflingly performative smile nowhere to be seen. Without the glory of his acting and the yapping to go with it, Overmind seemed naked without it. Or, perhaps, that’s simply what Dominator was assuming as it looked as if the younger man was just uncomfortable by standing here at all. But despite Overmind’s possible inner turmoil unknown to Dominator, the good doctor found his wits and began, “Your chess pieces, I… seem to have mistakenly taken them last we spoke.” And he rushed close to deposit them quickly into Dominator’s hands and stepped back, like he was doing his best to avoid the other, touch and all. “My apologies.”

“None needed.”

A silence stretched between them that Dominator allowed because besides just these mere chess pieces, there was more to this than that. He just needed to wait.

And soon he was rewarded, “Before I go…” Again, the hesitancy was unlike Overmind, but he composed himself to stare down Dominator with determination. And maybe the scientist was being a bit egotistic himself, but he was sure he saw a hint of admiration even. “About what you asked me earlier as well...”

“Refresh my memory?”

“Do not be so obtuse!”

“Only if you remain like this instead. I much prefer you this way,” Dominator snarked, no remorse in sight.

Overmind willed away any  heat from his cheeks and sighed to himself, pinching the bridge of nose, resigned to the fate that his housemate (and possibly the others) were immune to his grand acting. But, perhaps, this was for the best after all. There was something refreshing about not needing to follow a script unwillingly to please someone. No longer resigned but accepting, he nodded and stepped forward, taking back one pawn—the black one, his color. Dominator seemed confused until Overmind finally spoke up, “I meant, about the collaboration. I assume that wasn’t just you feeding me lies?”

Finally, Dominator smiled. “Not at all, I have some time in a few hours.”

“Excellent, then I shall see you then.” With that finally settled, Overmind felt lighter and offered his older counterpart a genuine smirk, not his plastic thin smile. “Oh, and Dominator?”

“Hmm?”

Overmind pointed his pawn aggressively at Dominator. “Be ready for a rematch as well.”

“Of course, doctor. I look forward to it.”

[knackfandomarchive]

could i ask for some lucas headcanons bc all of the ones you've posted so far are really cute lmao (he is my son)

Oh Bestie, you sweet-talker, you!

Umm... I'm so sorry; I had already talked about most of these before; I don't have much and only have like 15k words of prose across all my documents. I'm bringing these ideas up again mainly for context and in case some readers haven't seen them yet. This is sort of like an overview for the first segment of my story, and also some brief character analyses of certain scenes. I'm also not sure what would spoil my story or not.

I forgot how English works (and it's my only language).

Also this is depressing AF... I tried to put all the doom and gloom into this first part, so if anyone reading this wants to skip to the part that says, "I avoid giving Lucas any diagnosis..." then be my guest. It's. Half the post, tho.

And I'll post the art separately tomorrow, so people won't have to read the depressing stuff to see it.

With that, I can shakily point to a few foundational scenes I over-analyzed. Especially this one:

Where to start...

As we may recall in the first game, the Doctor complains to Ryder that it was easier to take care of Lucas when he was younger, and, "now he wants to know How and Why and debate everything. It's really quite trying at times."

This just sounds like puberty to me. Dad agreed; the Doctor probably received Lucas at a young, easy-to-please age and got used to that lifestyle. But as Lucas grew older, taking more independence, and forming his own opinions - normal development stuff - this resulted in conflict - the form of which I'm still unsure of.

So, I have Lucas lose his mom around eight years old. It's that vulnerable spot where he's old enough to remember her well, and young enough that he has little in the way of coping mechanisms. And while puberty is right around the corner, it gives the Doctor some time to know him before then.

Another thing to add, my Dad mentioned something Lucas said while reaching for his locket:

We're taking a literal approach to this. Not only is this device the last thing he has left of his mother, it's also the only thing he has left of his old life; all of his belongings had been destroyed or lost. We discussed possible causes, and I prefer something horrible and yet mundane. Not super newsworthy outside of his hometown. A fire, maybe?

Lucas needed a new home. And his father was never mentioned, which could mean anything (I haven't gotten around to that). In any case, they were not in the picture by this time. Next of kin would be Ryder or other family members.

We can recall Ryder in a later scene asking if Lucas wonders why the Doctor takes care of him, rather than Ryder doing so. Ryder explains his own unavailability as being very busy. I take this to mean two-fold: he was the only alternative when it came to raising Lucas, and it wasn't due to his capability to parent. So, if Lucas had other blood relatives, they never stepped up. Naturally, this results in Lucas feeling unwanted.

So many characters I need to get right... Lucas lost his mom, and Ryder lost his sister. Ryder may have thought himself and his life situation too unstable. Like he couldn't afford the responsibility on top of the grief and whatever else he had going on. Lucas stays with him for only as long as it takes to arrange a plan with the Doctor. I think Ryder might have some mental troubles of his own that would make raising a child difficult. But the Doctor isn't much better on that front.

Doctor Vargas seems to have had a lingering emotional wound since Charlotte disappeared, and based on vibes was likely a lonely, somewhat reserved man. But his living situation is the most stable, and he has kept it together for so long. And if he ever imagined having children, this would fill that need. So the arrangement - as my Dad suggested, and as I will have Ryder suggest - is a two birds, one stone kind of deal. The hope is that Doc and Lucas would help each other get better, and not worse.

Lucas is taken to the Doctor's Mansion, where Ryder will say goodbye. I have Ryder keep a stoic demeanor; he's trying to stay strong for Lucas. Even holding his breath to keep it from shuddering when they hug. But Lucas really could have benefitted from a more vulnerable moment with him, instead. Ryder is the one who gives Lucas the locket as a parting gift. Lucas begs him not to go, but Ryder can only say he's sorry.

I don't know the boy's educational situation exactly, but after that, his grades drop, he becomes more withdrawn, and his friends, if he has any, don't know how to help him. What are the chances they're mainly fair-weather friends, who go play with someone else when Lucas starts being a bummer? At least I haven't invented bullies to harass him on top of this. Actually, there's a chance that Lucas would be the bully, but I haven't decided.

Have I mentioned Lucas crying at night? He can just about gloomily keep it together during the day, but at night, when he's alone with his thoughts, he falls apart, and his crying soon wakes up the Doctor. Losing his mother and then feeling abandoned by his uncle and other relatives, it's a major blow to the self-esteem. And when his whole world is turned upside down in one fell swoop, it leaves him with a peculiar feeling.

Here is where I point out the next aspect:

Right here, this could have been the end of Lucas. And the Doctor can only watch him go. If I look at it from a more thematic view, Lucas's loss is so devastating to him that he'll clutch the memory of his mother and what he had before she died, at the expense of living himself.

So we have a semi-suicidal eight-year-old living with an older scientist and anyone else who lives in the same building. Scientists and their families from all over the world! I still don't know how the Doctor is going to take care of him. Lucas when he's older is grateful to the Doctor for taking him in, but doesn't seem to me to think of him as a father figure (but perhaps I just forgot something). And my grasp on the Doctor's character is extremely flimsy, despite him virtually being the protagonist of the first game.

I'm not sure how familiar Lucas is with Doctor Vargas. The boy's mom was a colleague, and Ryder trusts the Doctor a great deal, so at least they're not strangers. But Little Lucas might not have paid much attention to the Doctor. Maybe they played peek-a-boo a time or two. I can imagine a dark-haired toddler running under tables at company picnics or something. Doc might have showed him a couple neat gadgets or gifted him some. I dunno yet. What could be the KNACK-equivalent of a Game Boy?

During Lucas's crying spells, I kind of have the Doctor treat him like he's physically sick. Hold him while he cries, put a hand on his shoulder while he throws up, that sort of thing. Uhh, soup - in a big ol' thermos. Gotta stay hydrated and replenish those electrolytes.

Lucas crying and the Doctor consoling him is a regular occurrence for maybe a week or two, and the Doctor can't hide his exhaustion well. Still working out the details, but essentially Lucas doesn't really stop crying after that, he's just quieter about it and lies about it and Doctor Vargas doesn't press the issue. But the Doctor does worry. Lucas seems exhausted all the time, and when he's not hunched over and listless, or politely playing along with whatever to satisfy the grown-ups, he's throwing tantrums about the pointlessness of homework and anything else he doesn't want to do. I made that up. Sometimes he does still find joy in some things, and while it's temporary, it gives Doctor Vargas some hope.

The Doctor's thoughts, as they often do, turn to Charlotte, and how he felt after losing her. And what happened on that fateful day.

Lucas has a well-known love of puzzles. Because I want him to. And especially puzzles in video games. And what is science but a series of puzzles?

Before his mother's passing, I imagine Lucas enjoyed school and gained some reputation among his peers for being a nerdy kid and very smart. Naturally this would result in some peers getting close to him to improve their academic metrics or because they have similar interests. Maybe he has an interest in - the foundational stuff a seven-to-eight-year-old learns about - physics. I imagine he found his mommy's work very interesting and would ask her a lot of questions, sometimes rehashing the same ideas again and again (as my sibling did when they were little).

After she's gone, he still loves puzzles, but much like anything else, the experience of playing with them is tinged with regret. At the Doctor's place, I'm sure there are some other children and young folk living there, too, but I don't know how Lucas feels about them. I have to make so many characters...

I think Lucas would piece together some jigsaw puzzles in the lounge areas. And also slurp up much of the hot cocoa during winter time, but I digress.

Hmm. I need him to accumulate a small collection of toys, but I'm not sure yet who gives them to him and when. If he receives them all too soon and from strangers (scientists who find him endearing), he might feel sour about being pitied. At the same time, if he had a lot of toys before the fire, he'll sure miss their absence. Anyway, some things like: a small chess set, from which he'll lose some pieces, sidewalk chalk, a new gaming device with Tetris and a few other games on it, jump rope, a skateboard (actually a longboard), a Rubik's Cube, and some plushies. I want him to get the device and a plushy or two fairly quickly.

He mainly plays with the gaming device, and while it fills time and is entertaining, it does not fill the void. Still, the Doctor taps his shoulder one day.

"So. I heard you like puzzles?" Said more like a statement than a question.

Lucas doesn't fully understand the situation at first, on the order of a few hours or a day or so, when the Doctor shows him the orb. Doc tries to have a heart-to-heart moment with Lucas, but what the Doctor *says* reads like Chekhov's plasma cannon and I don't have the 'payoff' for that lined up, so I might change it.

But once it clicks for Lucas, it's like a switch is flipped. He smiles more and starts getting genuinely excited about things again. It helps that I had a pipe-dream of making Knack's puzzle a mini-game, so Lucas finds it fun. I'll want to add more to it, probably, depending on how I interpret Knack. I also have a headcanon that Knack's orb resembles a plasma globe in some tactile characteristic; Lucas likes to touch or hold it at every opportunity because it vaguely feels like something is going on in there. It's just so cool! The Doctor may or may not appreciate the novelty.

So it's like, Knack provides Lucas an opportunity to climb to his feet again. More indirectly than the screenshot, though.

I apparently got someone's game-play video confused for a trailer, and misinterpreted the YouTuber's voice as Lucas's voice, so one version of this post mentioned Knack having an incidental role of 'guardian' to Lucas. I still might want to play with that, though.

Anyway, if you're curious as to why Lucas finds the orb so much more satisfying than other puzzles, it's because of the angst. I had initially intended for Lucas to work on the project as something to distract him, much like any other puzzle, give him something to look forward to, and help him bond with Doctor Vargas. The Doctor himself hopes it can help the both of them move on from their losses, and hopes it can help him teach Lucas a thing or two.

But, somehow surprising even to me, Lucas seems to have taken it upon himself to solve this particular puzzle as a measure of value. If he can play a big part in solving it, and contribute to a grown-up scientific achievement, then he's worth all the trouble, right? Then he'll actually amount to something and be worth loving.

... I'm not sure what to say next except that I want to bonk him on the head with a paper towel roll and tell him he's being silly. And then give him a big hug.

At least he lets himself be happy again. In fact, his educational situation might flip from being too aloof to being too distracted. Doodling odd symbols in the margins of his homework and tapping his feet when he should be studying.

He still cries at night sometimes, though. Umm... trying to rack my brain here...

I avoid giving Lucas any diagnosis. Is this a bad idea? Would it be preferred I name his issues, and do research on them?

I kinda just make stuff up.

Okay, switching gears now. This part is more scattered because I don't know how to string the ideas together.

I think I mentioned the Doctor taking Lucas to places like museums and carnivals and aquariums.

Lucas might be prone to jealousy, at least when he is young, and becomes slightly possessive over the orb. This doesn't come up much beyond pressing his lips together, avoiding eye contact, and nursing a bitter feeling when the Doctor improves some experimental hardware without Lucas's prior knowledge. Lucas wonders if the Doctor had continued solving parts without him. Not sure if I should drop it.

Lucas is about ten years old by the time Knack is Manifested. I picked ten years old just 'cause that's about two years of working on the puzzle, enough time to build that machine. I don't want it to take too long or short because the puzzle I'm going with currently makes the Doctor look a bit stupid.

I have Lucas as twelve years old when the first game starts, because that's about middle-school age where the puberty does the things. And about 16 or so in the sequel, trying to balance the moved-out thing with the uncharacteristically immature behavior.

Also because Ava seems about 16 and Dad said that number makes sense for her role as a youth leader, and Ava and Lucas seem like peers. Man, they really flopped on the framing for the scene in this shot! I can hardly see Lucas at all with low brightness. Maybe it's different when you play it yourself.

Dad also told me something that I interpreted to mean most media is really bad at establishing ages. So I'm not sure what to do with that.

Anyway, ten years old.

I'm still not sure how, after the excitement of success subsides, Lucas will initially react to the creature made of stone. His reaction will probably depend on his background. Early drafts have him fed fairy tales that paint goblins unfavorably. And since the creature resembles a goblin in some aspects, Lucas freaks himself out or intimidates the little guy. But these drafts felt silly or off, because the creature is all smiles when he wakes up, and we know he's friendly. Also the Doctor just stands there. So I'll come up with something else, probably.

Regarding Knack's relationship with Lucas: When I see other people describe their relationship as sibling-like (a headcanon), they tend to position Knack as the elder. I may need to double-check; the fandom is pretty small and I haven't read much of the fanfictions. Another headcanon I saw a couple times is that Knack had been alive/conscious a long, long time ago.

But recently someone told me they interpret Lucas as the elder!

My interpretation is that Lucas steps up to that particular plate, first.

My idea goes: before anyone knows for sure that Knack's creature type also includes being a person, Lucas treats him a bit like a toddler and a pet, himself acting as the older brother and sorta babysitter. Still trying to decide if Knack knows he is a person at this stage... It seems like in both games, Lucas tends to talk to him like he's giving him a tutorial.

So I gotta figure out how the Doctor, Lucas, and some other folks turn a sweet little bean into the Knack we all know and love. And how Knack and the Doctor etc, do the same with Lucas.

Lucas is so silly!

I know you saw the one about the first night, Bestie [D;? but I'm not sure how to explain it concisely here. A lot of these I feel would be best shown in a comic series.

There is very much a theme of reciprocation in my story. That might be the wrong word. I'm thinking of familial affection. Lucas just doesn't get enough, and so, doing unto others as he would want to be treated, offers attention to Knack. What to list as examples... Reading him stories, nuzzling, very simple dancing. Probably more but I am my brain is made of Swiss cheese.

I did mention Knack being a sleepy baby on here at first, but I don't think I mentioned that Lucas worries if he's dying or something. It's like if you brought home a baby creature, but had no idea what it eats or needs to live, and then it acts groggier and less responsive, and can barely hold its head up... The Doctor kind of scoffs and says it's highly unlikely (not in a mean way), possibly thinking of Knack more like a device. But even if the Doctor is confident, Lucas isn't convinced. And Baby Knack doesn't know how to ask for what he needs, so he kind of furrows his brow and squints and makes little grumbling noises and like. I'm not sure how to describe it. It's like he kneads invisible dough or something? And he frequently glances up at Lucas or the Doctor.

Lucas tries really hard to not-cry and seem reasonable, but he can't help reaching out to pet the little guy's head. The creature responds very favorably, still sleepy. Leading Lucas to bring him into a hug, possibly picking him up. The creature is soothed by this, and after wrapping his arms around Lucas, he promptly falls asleep. Or something idk. Everything is a work in progress.

Knack occupies a weird role at first, and even later on occasion: something sort of like a pet, but not quite. Lucas is primarily the one who initiates the interactions like that, but sometimes the Doctor does as well. Knack himself does not understand until later.

I know it's silly to have Lucas pet him. He's basically a rock, even if he reminds me of a teddy bear sometimes. But look at that face! Lucas can feel warm and fuzzy just knowing that his little puzzle buddy likes him.

I also have Lucas very interested in Knack as a person, like how he's feeling and what he thinks. I think it would be funny if he gets good at reading Knack's body language, but not so good at interpreting his words sometimes. I'm kind of throwing out that scene in 2 where Knack gives Lucas an odd look for presuming what he's thinking and framing it as a 'talk'; if Lucas paid any attention to Knack, he would have done something like that a long time ago. And so I have him *do*: Early on, Lucas talks to the Doctor for Knack, like an untrained interpreter. And sometimes even airs his own grievances as if Knack is 'saying' so.

I mean, I *guess* I could have Lucas be oblivious to Knack's emotional situation unless it suits him, but then like. I dunno. That doesn't fit the little guy I made up so far. What feels more like Lucas?

Lucas sometimes imitates Knack's mannerisms and vice versa. Also expect recycled dialogue. I think Lucas vicariously experiences some adventure through Knack.

I still think Lucas gets swole by playing with Knack all the time.

Later, Knack and Lucas switch big-brother-little-brother roles based on the scene.

(I got this screenie from MoeePlays. The rest of the unwatermarked ones are from FullPlaythroughs.)

You may also see Knack playing the big-brother role while being Little Knack, if I can communicate that well enough. I think it's interesting. And the reverse.

Dad compared the way I describe Knack to Lennie Smalls in "Of Mice and Men", and suggested Lucas could be made somewhat like George. I must say, I hadn't read that story before then. So that was a wild ride! Now George, he's kind of prickly, which Lucas seems to be in the second game, but I'm a little hesitant. Dad also mentioned something about George's dream, and maybe Lucas could have something like that. I think I know what he means, and it's probably a reason I feel stuck in the 'ending' I had written; the dream feels impossible.

Jumping around again; if you were to talk to Lucas about Knack, and Knack was nowhere to be seen, Lucas would probably think of him as Little Knack. I looked too far into Lucas calling Knack "little buddy" at the start, and couldn't remember if Lucas called him something different later. I also interpreted this to mean Knack often hangs out with Lucas as Little Knack, which is supported by a brief shot or two in 1, and the title screen of 2.

Lucas considers Knack to be his achievement on some level. In fact, I consider this to be what he was alluding to in the museum in 2; that "without me, the Doctor would never have known-" how to bring Knack to life. I can imagine a young Lucas, when people are told that the Doctor had solved the puzzle and created Knack, saying quietly or thinking to himself, "*I* made this."

He goes back on that idea later. For Reasons. I might change that also, though. Then again, if I change the story every time I get caught and scraped up in a prickly patch, I wouldn't have much of a story anymore. I wouldn't necessarily say Lucas is naive. He's pretty smart and can sometimes pick up on things, but he can be willfully ignorant. If that doesn't make sense out of context, don't worry.

Changing the subject, Lucas kick-starts Knack's mischievous streak. He kind of teases him? Best example is the GIF I wanted to make but turned into a slideshow. In the garden, Lucas growls in jest at a Little Baby Knack, who reacts ferociously and growls back with rough red lettering, lifting his paws a bit and shifting his weight from foot to foot. Lucas laughs, delighted, and Baby Knack's expression shifts a little into amusement, before the GIF loops and they return to growling.

To clarify, Knack is playing, here. Although it does take him a few moments of fleeing and fawning to realize Oh, you're threatening me as a joke. Two can play at that game! Eventually, Lucas feels that Knack is acting too aggressive for his comfort, and, failing to notice that Knack is mirroring his own body language, worries he'll get a good punch to the gut. Or worse. He tries to de-escalate with the offer of a hug, which allows Baby Knack to play a mean prank.

And at one point I want Lucas to try smuggling Knack to school for the express purpose of scaring the crap out of Lucas's peers. For fun!

Another thing about how I wrote Lucas is that, when he is younger, at least, he isn't all that shy with Knack after like a day or so. I'm not sure how to say what I mean... It's like, Lucas has a tendency to get excited and touch, lightly pull, or grab Knack's arm(s), to get his attention, turn him around, or drag him somewhere. It's also a means of affection. He's gentle about it, but still. He isn't usually so grabby with other kids.

One of the things I considered playing with Knack is whether he might bite a family member when he is a 'baby'. But the more I think about it, the more the answer resounds no, he wouldn't. In one scene I wrote, Knack makes a non-lingual, idle threat (growling at him), but Lucas calls his bluff and takes something from him anyway. Lucas actually scoffs at him, incredulous.

Do not look to Lucas for guidance on how to treat children, animals, or operate heavy machinery.

Umm, what else. I bet Lucas would pass out if someone strokes his hair. First thing that comes to mind is Charlotte experimentally trying motherly things, feeling awkward about it and stopping. Lucas murmers something like, "You can keep going :)" Realizes what he just said, "I mean, if *you* want to," and scratches the back of his neck and looks away.

Along with a grappling hook (or maybe the Doctor gave him that), Ryder gives Lucas a butterfly knife for his twelfth birthday. This sounds very familiar to me, so either I thought about it before, it's practically canon, or someone else had mentioned it and I just can't remember. Or it could be a regular pocket knife.

At some point, to someone else, I have Doc describe Lucas as becoming more responsible since Knack came into his life. But of course, since the Doctor can never let Lucas have anything, he amends it with, "at times."

I also have this screenshot:

What was I going to put down for it...?

I remember seeing a review where someone mentioned this scene, gave an extremely reductive summary of it, and they thought "It plays out like a parody of kids movie/game “you-can-do-itism” but it’s not parodying anything in particular." I was rather miffed about that, to say the least; I thought this scene was a major characterization moment.

Lucas is curious/a scientist.

Knack puts so much faith in the Doctor that he limits himself. He also comes off like a major teacher's pet with his quoting ability.

The Doctor thinks himself so smart like he knows everything without testing it thoroughly. To the point where he has told Knack that he is incapable of something.

Lucas encourages Knack to try new things.

Not sure how to put this, but it comes up again in the Key Confrontation. Could be related to 4. Lucas is skeptical of the Doctor's authority and offers an opposing viewpoint. He prompts Knack to stop viewing the Doctor's words as gospel, at least temporarily. This is why I want Lucas and the Doctor to be/become foils in my story. Lucas sees himself in Knack.

Knack believes in the Doctor, sure. But he also trusts and believes in Lucas.

And one last thing, because I can't escape upsetting topics: there may be some parental favoritism going on between the Doctor and the boys. I loathe the idea, but it slots into my current framework with unfortunate agreement. I had a conversation with Dad about it, and he said, uhh trying to remember... it's a reasonable idea. He spoke of Lucas coming into his own and how it challenges the Doctor's ego, meanwhile Knack does whatever the Doctor says without question.

I don't think Lucas would resent or blame the Doctor's Greatest Creation, but it would impact his self-esteem. I don't know what that looks like yet.

Umm, I hope this was worth the wait; I had a lot of fun! I want to add more but I'm kind of scatter-brained. Also this is 4.6k words apparently.

[ageless-aislynn]

I am completely the Jackal in these GIFs and Noble Six and her Mighty Forklift of Doom™ is life. It's been a fun one these past few days in particular, friends.

I got to have my regular chat with my pals at the IRS a few days ago. Problem is solved, um, probably? I should've gotten a letter confirming that but yeahhhhh, we're sure it's fixed even though you didn't the letter saying it's fixed! 🙃

In this GIF, John is kindly standing in for the IRS while Kwan represents me trying to GET THE DANG PROBLEM THAT THEY CAUSED IN THE FIRST PLACE fixed. Since February.

This morning, my landline was dead. (6 hours later, I found out that, oops, they accidentally turned off our service, I guess? 😬 Well, at least they turned it back on, so, WIN. 🤷‍♀️)

I can't seem to get the new pharmacy and my doctor's office on the same page when it comes to filling 2 of my meds. One of them is one of my diabetes meds. I DO NOT want to abruptly stop that one. Bad Things© will happen if I do.

Silver Team representing my blood sugar levels in that scenario.

(Yeah, so they should try to get me samples or something to prevent me from running totally out so hopefully this won't be the case. But it's a little scary because it's still technically on the table, you know?😬)

And then, to add insult to the injury of the absolute DAY I've been having for the past 2 weeks or so... Walmart delivered my white chocolate caramel coffee... to somebody that wasn't me. And sent me a picture of hanging out on somebody else's porch, just, you know... mocking me. 😱😉

Me without my white chocolate caramel coffee.

Also me without my white chocolate caramel coffee.

Whoever got my white chocolate caramel coffee.

Me pretend drinking my white chocolate caramel coffee.

😂😉 Yeah, so I'm just being silly now, of course. Better to laugh, right? They refunded me and hopefully tomorrow my shiny new order will be here.

And all I really want to do is make more Mass Effect Andromeda vids. I have no idea why my muse is determined to just keep showing up to that party 6 years after everybody else left.

Don't mind my muse, she's just here partying by herself, lol! Be careful, it might get a little wild in here!

All right, I've complained more than enough. 😉 If you're still reading this, thanks and have a hug and/or a heart cookie, if you'd like! 🤗💖

Love you, frens. Hope you're well. 💖

[janeeyreofmanderley]

I was thinking once again about the infamous "King Laugh" sequence, and how this twisted, hysteric bit, ist the only time, we really learn anything about Van Helsing as a person, and not only as a teacher, doctor and expert at obscure and supernatural diseases....

My heart bleed for that poor boy—that dear boy, so of the age of mine own boy had I been so blessed that he live, and with his hair and eyes the same. There, you know now why I love him so. And yet when he say things that touch my husband-heart to the quick, and make my father-heart yearn to him as to no other man—not even to you, friend John, for we are more level in experiences than father and son—yet even at such moment King Laugh he come to me and shout and bellow in my ear, 'Here I am! here I am!' till the blood come dance back and bring some of the sunshine that he carry with him to my cheek.

For the first time we learn of Van Helsing's family. Or rather former family. He used to have a son, and this son is dead. His profession has the sole aim of saving lives, and yet here he is, a bereaved father, who only sees his son in other young men's faces, and only by looking at them can conjure shadows of what his son might have been like. I think it adds some extra layer to the passion and urgency he shows, when trying to save lives. Always thinking of the one he wanted to save most, but could not. But there is more....

"Just so. Said he not that the transfusion of his blood to her veins had made her truly his bride?"

"Yes, and it was a sweet and comforting idea for him."

"Quite so. But there was a difficulty, friend John. If so that, then what about the others? Ho, ho! Then this so sweet maid is a polyandrist, and me, with my poor wife dead to me, but alive by Church's law, though no wits, all gone—even I, who am faithful husband to this now-no-wife, am bigamist."

Not only is the poor man a now childless father, he is also the widower of a living wife. His wife is insane. Possibly also a result of the loss of their child, which certainly is enough to push people over the edge. He lives like a widower, but wihtout the option of recovery. He has the responsibilty to care for her, but can never enjoy her company again, nor start a new life with someone else. He has no chance for another family. He is effectively doomed to loneliness. Also that sheds a new light on his relationship to Jack as well as Jack's profession. Van Helsing clearly is his mentor, and Jack's focus of medical interst is the care for the mentally ill. Given that Van Helsing's ill wife most likely lives in an asylum I think one can assume, that Van Helsing also has a similar focus, hoping to improve or (one can hope) even maybe cure these kinds of afflictions. So much of what Jack attempts in the care for the patients of his asylum might be sth he actually learned from Van Helsing...

[morganaseren]

kicks down your door. have you considered niamh/bethany/leliana before, and if not, what is a poly ship that you think would be more effective/you like better, if you're so inclined

Friend, you are now going to take responsibility for all my rambling because now the plot bunnies won't stop with this idea. Okay? Okay! 😂 Everything shall be below the cut because of the length.

So there is a bit of an age difference between the three of them. I'm going to use their Inquisition ages here per my fic because I'm so used to writing their characterizations from that time period. That means Leliana is 37 (or roughly around that age, depending on how you want to interpret the source material), Niamh is 33, and Bethany is canonically 30 by then.

I'll preface this all by saying that I think they would work well together in an AU because so much of DA's canon world state surrounds Niamh and Bethany in such doom and gloom (both the Cousland background and the fate of the Hawkes are just so tragic), and I actually want them to be happy without having them wallow too much in that.

Having said that, you won't see the usual prejudices depicted in the games, especially in regards to mages. Circles exist only in the sense that they're schools of magic with students who can freely come and go within them. Thus, Niamh's and Bethany's respective positions in the world of Thedas would be nearly as prominent as Leliana's own status as Left Hand of Divine Justinia.

Considering Leliana's reputation, everyone outside her personal circle would assume the Knight-Enchanter and Necromancer she's in a polyamorous relationship with must be absolutely intimidating.

In reality, they're like the nicest women you could ever meet.

I've always viewed the Knight-Enchanter class to be something like a doctor in our world albeit on a completely different level. I mean, they literally have the power to resurrect people and help regrow lost limbs, and that's on top of already being able to conjure a sword made completely of magic! How mindblowing is that?!

But with any doctor comes the aspect of patient care obviously, and considering the headcanons I have of Bethany in OtSttCA taking in a lot of abandoned mage children during the Templar-Mage war, I imagine she'd be the head healer of a charitable clinic, who specializes with younger patients dealing with chronic illnesses.

That's the sweet, nurturing part of her, but anyone who has ever played the Knight-Enchanter class know all too well just how tanky these mages are. Like, holy shit, do you realize how much damage a solo Knight-Enchanter can take against a High Dragon in Nightmare mode?? Absolutely stunning! And now because of you, dear Jelly-friend, I now envision Bethany conjuring a magical battleaxe instead of the typical magical sword. It's badass, and I love that for her!

I mentioned Leliana is also dating a Necromancer, so, yes, Niamh's canonically a Necromancer in Inquisition. Outside the game, it's honestly because I already played a Knight-Enchanter before and wanted to try something different. In-game logic though? Some aspects of the Necromancer class reminded Niamh of Morrigan, and she chose it as a way to honor one of her first and truest friends outside of the Circle.

Plus, Niamh's fascinated by the metaphysical aspect regarding the class, especially when you add spirits into the mix. Beyond that though, Niamh is just an absolute nerd. Like, she greatly enjoys learning just for the sake of learning, so despite being one of the most respected figures in the magical house of dark arts, Niamh's just an absolute cinnamon roll. She'd rather talk your ear off about her work rather than resort to violence most of the time. Like with her elemental magic though, she tends to use her powers of necromancy in rather innovative ways, which has earned her some measure of fame.

For instance, there's a vase of Andraste's Grace that Leliana always keeps on her desk. Most assume that she regularly changes out the flowers within them, but no. They're actually the same flowers she's kept for years, and they were originally gifted to her by Niamh. She somehow managed to use her abilities to encapsulate the very energy inside the flowers and have it cycle in a near endless loop to keep them looking as lively as the day she first picked them.

Niamh was very proud of herself when she figured out how to do it. 😄

Keeping with that arcane user reputation of hers though, Niamh also learned shape-shifting from Morrigan—mostly because I think it would be hilarious if Cassandra or some other Chantry official would try to rouse Leliana for some incident that could just as easily be dealt with tomorrow only to find this large, black wolf sitting directly in front of the door regarding them with an air of utter disapproval.

When the Chantry officials are being particularly obstinate though, Bethany even joins Niamh by camping out in front of Leliana's door to further bar them from disturbing Leliana from her much-needed rest (that Bethany firmly insisted on and Leliana only somewhat begrudgingly agreed to after certain favors were promised in return for her obedience in the matter... 😏).

"The Left Hand has spent nearly the past fortnight ensuring enemies of the Divine were apprehended by her network if not outright routed into the Chantry's respective military forces," Bethany begins while not bothering to look up from where she's reading updates regarding her various patients. "Unless Her Holiness desires her presence herself, then I will trust you're all capable of dealing with a situation that is hardly between life and death." She barely smothers a smile when she hears an audible huff of incredulity from the wolf she's leaning against, gently ribbing Niamh in half-hearted reprimand. "Good day to you all."

But, yeah, despite being the youngest of the bunch, Bethany's usually the one making sure no one overworks themselves too much; that caring healer trait of hers doesn't always leave once she's done with her patients in the clinic. 😂 Niamh would absolutely forget to eat and just stay in her personal office for hours on end to write new academic dissertations while Leliana would be lost in the endless mindset of "Just one more report to read!" or "Just one more situation to deal with!"

Of course, while Niamh and Bethany are seen as outwardly sweet women, they can still utterly devastate their enemies with their respective magic. In that same sense, Leliana is often regarded as a rather terrifying woman, who casts a shadow across all Thedas with the reach of her spy network, but with her lovers, she's as gentle and loving as can be. 🥰

But to answer your other question, I think one other poly pairing that I'll probably have to write about at some point would be Isabela/Hawke/Merrill.

Honestly, there's a lot of women in the DA series that I would like to write about more such as Anora or Shianni, but I don't know in what context yet. 👀

Thanks for sending this in, friend! This was fun to think about!

[tenpintsofsundrop]

to add onto your garchel post-

i dont really like the ship because even before titans, people have always seen Gar/beast boy as 'Rachel's love interest/boyfriend'(in my opinion).

when in fact he's his own character and deserves to be known for something OTHER than that...

YES !!! YES EXACTLY

like the fact that he and Rachel were seperated for an entire season in Titans and all Gar could talk about the entire time was.... Jason... like hmmm. Titans really wants him to be more than just a love interest for her

Even if you just consider the amount of growth he had while being apart from Rachel - he struggled with having his voice heard while running around trying to play therapist for everyone else, he felt at opposition with Conner (someone he previously got along well with) because he was struggling to develop/fully explore his powers compared to someone who has a very useful and advanced power set, and most of all - Gar missed his best friend and was the only sympathetic voice of Jason in the Titans group.

Even during the independent time he had away from Rachel in S2, I liked the way his character progressed without the show trying to shade some romance between them for fan service without actually confirming it (yet, they still managing to fucking shoehorn in Garchel fanservice in the Cadmus storyline, but I have already ranted about how I think Gar's S2 storyline should have gone in other posts).

Even from the jump, right from S1, where they clearly wanna bait Garchel/BBRae fans in with the whole arcade scene and them holding hands and "there is nothing evil about you, Rachel" - to me, Gar's character was so much more interesting independently because of how he fit into the Doom Patrol family dynamic.

With the scene where he is talking to Doctor Caulder and being scolded for bringing Rachel back while simultaneously being baited into revealing more information about her - the way his eyes sparkle with unshed tears at the way Doctor Caulder speaks to him brings so much depth to his character and it makes me wanna know more about him as a character. Even the part where he goes up to Rita's room and knocks on her door to no answer - keeping his voice bright, telling her that there is no pressure for her to come out. Clearly he's so used to being the person who cheers everyone else up, and that's why he flocked to Rachel, wanting to help fix her problems, because he is used to finding validation in that.

a

Also there is a scene in season 4 that I have just been dying to do a breakdown of, because it is one of the siganture Gar is only here to support Rachel, there to be her emotional sponge, his problems don't matter, he's just her accesory kind of thing. The part where she's talking about the maple syrup, and how she can truly smell it for the first time because she has lost her powers, and she is like "is this what it's like to not have everyone's problems constantly burdening you?"

and then Gar shrugs and is like "I wouldn't know"

but - even though he's not a magical witch who can literally feel other people's emotions, he is a highly empathetic (most likely autistic person) who is constantly thinking about how his actions will affect everyone else, constantly worrying about everyone else's problems, and the expression on his face in that moment is "are you fucking kidding me?" because the entirety of season three is him running around worrying about everyone else's problems instead of worrying about himself (given, Rachel wouldn't know that because she is absent) - but still.

I don't see how anyone can take that scene as romantic/shipping when it is clear that they are on two different wavelengths and communicating over each other instead of to each other

Like the show adds so much depth to Gar as a character, and Gar and Rachel have so much more to offer as characters than just potential romantic interests for each other - and yet, the Garchel shippers just reduce it down to: Rachel is really cool and op and Gar is there!!! And they are in love!!!

Like they will take any moment in the show where he even looks at her be like LOOK !!! SHIP !!! Instead of actually discussing how awesome they are as individual characters

[i-love-an-alcoholic]

Story of M: How I became an addict, Part One

CONTENT WARNING: Alcohol and drug abuse

Edit: I want to add that alcohol withdrawal is potentially lethal and should NEVER be attempted without consulting a medical professional!

I began using alcohol as a coping mechanism at age 17. I was an outcast at school. My parents' marriage was nothing but a facade and my mother took her frustrations about their impending divorce out on me. I had very little hope for the future and being told I'd never amount to anything did not help. I had always dreamed of becoming a visual artist but felt I had no talent at all and I was doomed to fail at everything I tried. I had been diagnosed with depression at 14 and received counseling for it which was a positive, but as soon as the bi-weekly session was over I had to return to my regular life which was becoming more and more unbearable every day.

My parents didn't drink a lot, but we had a fairly well-stocked liquor cabinet full of souvenir bottles from my father's travels. "Nobody's going to drink these anyway", I thought and took some of the bottles and hid them in my closet. After my parents and sibling went to bed, I'd take a bottle and force its contents down my throat. My room was on the opposite side of our apartment from other bedrooms and it also had a convenient second bathroom right next to it, so when I had had too much I could throw up discreetly without waking them up.

I did this multiple times a week. My grades went down because I was groggy and hung over at school. One time I took a whole bottle of champagne and went outside to drink it. I was sitting on a park bench next to a playground, drinking straight from the bottle, all alone.

Legal drinking age is 18 where I live, and oddly enough, turning 18 slowed down my drinking. I didn't have to drink my parents' booze or hide my alcohol use any longer, but I had to buy it myself and store it in the fridge where my mother would see and comment about it. Things were pretty good for a while. I graduated from school with average grades, managed to get into a university and moved out at 19, at the same time my parents divorced.

I failed hard at uni. After two years, at 21, I changed schools into a more practical one, and for the first time in a long time, felt good about myself. I did well academically and was popular within our group. I even got a good friend, J. J was a party dude and we partied a lot, more than everybody else. Despite that everything was good for a year or so.

At the time I was in a relationship with a very troubled guy (I could go on forever about him, but I digress) who got into designer drugs and convinced me to try them too. To this day I have no idea what the stuff even was, but I believe it was a synthetic cannabinoid. I was sold. I took that stuff daily for several weeks, while neglecting my schoolwork. After that I would actively seek drugs in addition to binge drinking 2 to 3 times a week.

Despite this I managed to get my degree and landed a fairly well-paid job straigh out of school. I had to move cities for my job, but stayed in a long-distance relationship with the aforementioned troubled guy mainly because of his contacts. My job was at times very stressful, which I used to justify my binge drinking and occasional drug use. Work hard, party harder and so forth. I was around 26 when I began to notice negative side effects of binge drinking: I was overweight, bloated, irritable when sober and had scary hangovers. I tried to quit drinking, but found out I couldn't do it for more than a week.

Since I couldn't quit on my own, I went to see a doctor and asked for an Antabus (disulfiram) prescription which he happily gave to me. I know that Antabus does not work for everybody but it helped me immensely. At first everything was terrible, but after some weeks it got easier and easier until all the cravings were completely gone and I felt like a new person. All's well that ends well, right?

Wrong. To be continued.

[statticscribbles]

Needles

Summary: Sweet Pea/Reader where the reader is terrified of needles and has to get vaccinated

You grimace, it’s been raining for the entire hour you’d been on the scouting mission with Toni and Fangs. It’s not too horrible, you’ll huddled up in a car, nice and dry, but cold and knowing once the  stakeout time is doen you’ll have to walk back in the rain. It hadn’t been far to walk from the Serpent's headquarters and it had been dry while doing it; but now with the rain and no sign of it stopping you’re dreading the walk back.

“Come on stupid fucking Ghouls….” You glare as one of them walks out from the back of the house, they leave the door open and you can hear faint music but it’s drowned out by the yelling.

“We’re gonna be out here all night.” “Well that is the point of a stake out…”

“If one of them would fucking do something we could just go and-” You don’t finish, Fangs grabbing your arm and pulling you back, right as one of the Ghouls throws a brick at you.

“Jesus fucking, okay fine…” You hiss as Fangs pulls you back, you grimace feeling something scrape against you as Toni shoves both you and Fangs onto a scrap pile so you can jump the fence better.

You grimace as you pull your jacket off there’s a tear through your sleeve, which is also a small cut on your arm. You glare at Fangs who shrugs towards Toni and you turn your glare to her.

“Don’t be mad at me if I hadn’t done that you’d most likely be either dead or captured by the Ghouls, and we all know how that would end.”

“Mhm; bet being dead would be better than being captured by them.” “Captured by who?”

“The ghouls from last night's mission.”

“Oh did they spot you guys?”

“Yeah we got out without anything besides Y/N getting a little scrape.”

“A scrape? From the ghoul’s yard? You know that’ll end up with Tetanus.”

“I won’t get tetanus. See, it's already scabbing…”

“That looks red and inflamed to me…”

“Sweet’s you’re just lying to get me to get a shot!”

“Y/N that was the rustiest scrap I think I’ve ever seen.”

“It was more rust than metal I think.”

“Not fucking helping Fangs.” You swat at him and Sweet Pea’s glare remains the same.

“”You know you have to get the shot Y/N, so you don't get tetanus and die.”

“I won't get tetanus and die! I’d just get like, a little sick, if anything!”

“Death is what you'll get!!!

“I’ll go, if and only if…” Sweet Pea leans forward, clearly excited.

“You spend all the rest of the day cuddling me and watching whatever I want!”

“Even that trashy reality..”

“YES! Especially that! I forgot they have a whole new season out!!!’ You beam, momentarily distracted from the impending doom of having to get a shot.

”Wait you get the shot where?” You haven’t stopped shaking since you’d gotten to the doctor's office and you know sweet pea is probably regretting letting you hold his hand with how tightly you grip it.

“Okay I know this isn’t very fun, but…”

“She’s terrified of needles.” Sweet Pea adds and you’re too wary and hyper focused on the needle the nurse has to disagree with him.

You don’t scream when she jabs you, but you do wince, and Sweet Pea turns your head away so you don’t have to look. You still know the needle is there. Sweet Pea does a good job of calming you, talking about the latest trouble Betty has dragged Veronica and Jughead into. He manages to make you laugh and you can tell he’s clearly proud of it, but is still dreading the reality tv marathon you’ve set up with him.

You’ve barely made it through the first episode of the new season but Sweet Pea is playing with your hair so you’re falling asleep. Despite the terror from earlier and the issues with the Ghoulies that started you’re content and can feel yourself drifting off more as Sweet Pea is cuddling you.

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[deviantartdramanow]

To the DA mod and all who helped against TallTherify29 read this

Videos that are our victory theme: (No reporting them, they are there for the message and the animation that suits the situation) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CG4Lovk3Rc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5o_mKHP3Ns https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGklGWrX-gE This is an appreciation post, not a report one. Soulidium here, part of the Red Hood Squad and one who is in direct contact with Red Hood himself. You all did AMAZING. Just fantastic. All of you anons and non anons, you went above and beyond to help take down this rat who thought she was above DA TOS. Who thought she was a queen that was untouchable. Well even queens get their heads chopped off when they are tyrannical. Just ask miss Marie Antoinette. ;3 Tall's crown of lies with her throne of bones of those she tormented has finally been toppled on DA. All the people she hurt, all the people she manipulated can finally breathe easy with one less fucked up little freak chasing after them in the shadows as she cries fake tears to her minions. I want to thank the ones who lurk in the shadows watching who report, those who spread word of her lies with proof on DA itself to those she tries to trick. To those who confronted her and got backlash, to those who tried to help her (KillerKokichi you are a saint, and you can finally rest easy my friend.) along with the many others who tried to show her the error of her ways but sadly failed as she hurt you and turned against you. You cannot reason with a devil after all, and devils like her refuse to admit when they are wrong. I want to thank Doctor Ray for his 'balls to the wall Leroy fucking Jenkins" attitude as he kept working his ass off to push Tall to the brink and snap, forcing her to doom herself and wish death which was the ultimate nail in her coffin of her DA empire. He is now sadly not in good favor with DA, but he did MORE than DA staff did in the 2 years her ass stunk up this site with her grooming, theft, and gaslighting with suicide baiting for attention. We also should give a big hand to Mod S for calmly reviewing and giving a thumbs up to each annoying submission on her insane stupidity as they lose braincells seeing her in action and wondering where the fuck her parents are. (They dont care unlike what Tall claims. They probably grounded her ass.) It was probably a huge headache for Mod having to see so much bullshit on her come into the submissions since she refused to shut her fat mouth on DA and kept wishing threats on other lives while thinking she was sweet and innocent like a lamb, when really she's a snarling little wolf hiding under the lamb's shredded skin that she tore off said animal. But yes, thanks to all of you. Minors can rest easier on DA knowing that she's now officially a ban evader like the DJX and Anti-rex she so funnily mocked, but NOW she's in their ranks as a RULE BREAKER. Those who draw Balan and NiGHTS along with FNF art and Persona art can also rest well without her freaky ass commenting on their art as she plots to trace it to add to her stupid bullshit fantasy story. All she tormented can rest easier. We did an amazing thing here. All of you, you are amazing and wonderful. You made DA alittle bit safer from assholes like TT29 who will now be silenced forever on DA, kicked out for if she ever tries to return. Her DA empire is gone, her reign of terror on DA is over. Artists, and minors alike along with those who hate suicide baiters like her can celebrate. Thank you all. And again, keep watch if she resurfaces, do not let her sneak back in to DA, be ready to send tickets to kick her sneaky ass back out. May good fortune smile on all of you and mod S for this deed that was long and stressful, but in the end, we were all victorious in our efforts to keep DA safer, if not a tiny bit. ~Soulidium and the Red Hood squad leader J. T.

Mod note: thank you, thank you v much

if anyone wanted to keep up on the Tall drama via Youtube, furrydrama posts the Youtube links.