#I don't do anything but anticipate

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

[voluntaryvictim]

how am i supposed to act fine when in a few hours i can listen to a new idkhow album after 3 and a half years.

[hotwaterandmilk]

Hey quite curious why the X manga was discontinued. It was so good. Always enjoy your collections but the way! Hope next week is better for you!

Aww thank you for the kind words, I'm glad you enjoy seeing what I post. Now look I'll be the first person to say I'm not a dedicated CLAMP fan (I only really feel strongly about Magic Knight Rayearth), but I did read X back in the day and was actually buying Asuka in real time as the chapters started becoming increasingly sporadic.

I realise in retrospect how interesting it was to see the series slowly disappear right before my eyes. I don't think I noticed it at first, but then it sort of got like "oh, still no X huh?" about most issues of Asuka until it ceased appearing completely.

I think the most commonly cited explanation is the one from the group in a 2004 PAFU interview which notes the increasing number of real life disasters occuring (the Great Hanshin-Awaji Earthquake in '95 and the Kobe serial child murders in '97 as specific examples) and the changing social conditions as a result of these disasters making it difficult to for them to continue the series to its conclusion.

Whether this relates to editorial opinions on the appropriateness of the series continuing in that context, or simply a personal decision by the group to step back due to these real life incidents is hard to say for sure.

I think looking at CLAMP's increasing number of discontinued series over the past 20 years you could also argue that perhaps they simply lost steam with X and couldn't or didn't want to bring it to its intended conclusion for whatever reason -- and still don't. But whether this ties into a changing social response to their manga due to IRL isues or is related to something more straightforward like loss of interest, I can't really say.

Readers were truly invested in the series at the time though, that I can say unequivocally -- it was talked about in my online and IRL circles on a frequent basis during that early 00s period.

While it would be amazing to see a continuation of X some day with the 30th anniversary having been and gone & the PREMIUM COLLECTION volumes only having to 18.5, I have my doubts about them ever picking it up again.

So yeah, as I said I'm not a close CLAMP follower or particularly knowledgeable on their series, but that interview is really the only place they've said anything clearly about their reasons for suspending the title to my knowledge. Everything else, well, people will continue to speculate on for decades to come I imagine.

[tkachukisms]

i’m confused by your last posts — nick cousins is not on the team? he’s an unrestricted free agent and there’s no reports he’s in talks for a new contract with the panthers… even if we wanted to being him back, we spent the cap? there’s no money to resign him, that’s why we couldn’t bring tarasenko back either (obviously he’s more expensive tho)

no, like. functionally I don't expect him to come back, obviously, but it's just deeply frustrating to see so many good people leave and for him to still not be signed somewhere else yet. it's upsetting! so I'm mindlessly complaining about it, lol. basically getting the last jokes I can out of him to make myself have some sort of mild comfort as everyone I hold dear is being taken out back and shot, yanno?

[sagittariangirl27]

This reminds me of one of my first tumblrs. I started with erotic art, and ended up finding myself. I will be back here soon.

[xxxemilyg1996]

"Ah man, my dad's dead" me, just now remembering that my father is in fact, actually dead and has been for almost 3 years

[daz4i]

i need to stop saying "i would rather die" whenever i don't wanna do smth. like yeah bitch we know. you'd rather do that over literally everything stfu

[junonreactor]

every week people fuck up my name in ways i could never imagine

[tambourineophelia]

.

[thethingything]

I'm fatigued, my back hurts, I accidentally spent like 3 hours sat downstairs in a chair that made our back feel worse because our executive dysfunction prevented me getting up and going back upstairs even though I only went down there to get one thing, and now I really need to lay down but if I accidentally fall asleep again I feel like I'll wake up, realise I fell asleep and also that I feel like I wasted a big chunk of the day, and I'll end up feeling even worse again

[thedreadvampy]

callout posts will truly be like:

and the post they're talking about will be like

and then they'll be like "what do you mean I'm overstating harm?"

[musical-chick-13]

so what is this fic actually about?

oh god. okay I'm going to put this under a cut because of the topics involved.

Content warning for: discussions of consent (which includes mentioning non-con themes), discussions of intense kink practices, and references to cult-related trauma as per DW canon.

I will continue tagging all posts about this fic, as well as posting the fic itself, with "The Fic That's A Lot," as well as "c2g" which is an abbreviation of its title.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS IN ANY WAY, I MEAN IT

I am going to be frank, this fic is about CNC. If you don't know what that is...well, it's highly probable this is not the story for you. But I will provide an explanation anyway if anyone's curious.

CNC stands for, in this context, "Consensual Non-Consent," which probably seems like an oxymoron. It refers to people roleplaying a fictional scenario where one of the parties involved pretends (key word pretends) to object to, protest, or otherwise not want to participate in a sexual encounter--this is what the "non-consent" part of the name refers to. Meanwhile, the other party pretends (again, key word pretends) to coerce the protesting party into some kind of sexual activity. The parties are, in a sex/kink situation, acting out a pre-agreed scene--which is what the "consensual" part of the name refers to, that pre-agreement--of non-consent.

It is important to note that this is not the same thing as actual assault: Boundaries are intensively discussed beforehand, and everyone involved decides together on a separate safeword and/or physical movement that anyone can use to end the roleplay scene immediately. Someone may be using words like "Stop" or "No" within the scene itself because they are playing the role of someone who does not consent to what is currently happening (akin to acting in a play or a movie, where an actor has to pretend to like or dislike or approve or disapprove or want or not want various things, regardless of whether any of that matches up with who they actually are as a person--in a CNC scenario, the people are playing characters, albeit in a much, much more intense way). But if something happens in this roleplay scene that someone does genuinely object to, there is a separate mechanism (sometimes several mechanisms) serving as a way out, fulfilling the function that something like "stop" or "get away from me" would fulfill in a non-CNC encounter.

ALL OF THIS TO SAY. The premise of this particular story examines how both of these characters (this is an 11/R fic, and I am trying very hard to make sure this post doesn't end up in the show or character tags) would get to the point where they realize this is something they want to do. And then, from there, once they've separately and individually realized that: What do they discover about themselves and their relationship in the process? How do they talk about it once it becomes clear that this is something they both want? How do they feel about wanting it? How does this interact with the woman in question having a background of, essentially, being brainwashed by a cult and having her childhood stolen? And how does this situation relate to how these characters view the concepts of control and romantic love? (Honestly, even more than the CNC itself, which is something that gets frequently maligned as romanticizing/normalizing abuse when people write about it, the most controversial part of this is that I put her in the sub role and not the dom role, lmao. Which I have a whole essay in my brain on why that is based on various lines/scenes/behavior in canon, but I don't think that's important right now and also this answer is already too goddamn long.) And then, in addition to all those aforementioned things, what are some of the other facets of their relationship outside of this?

Like I have mentioned at-length. This is. A lot. There's a reason the average person does not engage with CNC. And there is a lot of communication and set up that has to happen for this to work. (I had to do. SO much research for this.) But I want to confirm that nothing actually non-consensual happens in this story. He doesn't ever come anywhere remotely near hurting her (he doesn't even actually fantasize about anything, he just realizes he Has Some Particular Ideas and then feels really bad about them). And although I'm not going to spoil specifics, they both have a very positive experience with it.

I will say, though this is dual pov, more of it is from his perspective, and he is acting out the role of the aggressor. So that's another thing people need to be mindful of if they have an interest in reading this once it's up.

[buckets-of-dirt]

I love my little dog so much but man in retrospect there's so much I wish my family had known about dog care 14 years ago. I know some of his health problems are just parts of getting old and would've happened regardless, but there are things we could've easily incorporated into our routine from puppyhood to prevent certain problems (or at least reduce their severity). And I know we were doing our best with the resources at our disposal, especially since as my dog he was kind of my project (a bit of a big task for a 10 year old whose research capabilities were basically just the school library but 🤷‍♂️), but watching him deteriorate before my eyes and knowing it's partially because of something I didn't do makes it all the more painful.

And I feel like a lot of the information we didn't have, some of it essential to long-term health (like brushing their teeth daily), is stuff that your average dog owner doesn't seem to know either. It's almost like there's this popular Image of how to care for a dog that's reinforced by our society at large, and then there's the things that only the Heavily Invested™️ (aka the people who get mocked for being "dog parents") do. And a lot of times there are things everyone really should be doing for their dogs, but they never know because they work off that popular image and add anything their vet specifically tells them to do as they go along. Except, at least in Milo's case, the vet really only gives advice once there's an Obvious Problem.

Anyway the point I was trying to make somewhere in all that waffle is that if you have a young dog start toothbrush training RIGHT NOW. You do not want them to get gingivitis someday, and nobody told us how to prevent it until it was already too late.

[alatus-k]

ah crap I was so motivated two weeks ago and now I am so seasonal depression

[ranger-kellyn]

if this plot bunny doesn't leave me the fuck alone.................like my guy we JUST finished the outline for our nano project we can'T DO THIS NOW--

[cipher26]

i get really frustrated with days like today where i’m not feeling bad, but i also can’t function normally or feed myself, which blows up my plans for doing anything cause i can’t get it together. i also think right now though, because i’ve been working so much and moving, and basically been busy nonstop for the past few months, i’m having a hard time making my body remember how to relax. and also it’s been so long since i’ve lived in the city and been on my own with any free time, i just like...have forgotten what it’s like to live? lol. which i know sounds stupid, but really, i’ve forgotten about a lot of things that I can do in the city, and the places I can go since it was all unavailable to me for...really a few years. because even before moving to jersey for awhile it was covid and everything was closed and unsafe, so i really haven’t like, gone out and around very much in a really really long time.

also doesn’t help that i’m still horrifically out of shape and my knee still hurts daily. anyway idk what the point of this post is...i think i’m just frustrated with today cause i was gonna go out and do stuff but i was exhausted and my place is a bit of a mess cause i’ve been working so much i haven’t had time to keep it clean. so instead i’ve just been sitting around all day trying and failing to make my body go do things.