#I haven't properly colored in a while

[bigchumpus]

Rewatched a bit of double life :D

[mikunology]

goofing about with my VY1 & 2 designs

[novelconcepts]

the truly problematic thing about having insanely vivid dreams just about every night--and i mean the kind of vivid where you remember details days or even weeks later, like it's just another normal-ass memory--is that you wind up losing track on an emotional level of what's real. like. i know that was a dream. obviously it was a dream. but some part of my brain misses it like it really happened. i am painfully, achingly nostalgic for people i've never met, places i've never been, shit that literally could not ever happen--but i feel as though i remember. which is just the most unhinged thing, right? like, i remember going on a run that took me over a fence into Disneyland, and i remember having to take a shortcut through a Chinese restaurant, but it was fine, because Erika Ishii was there, and they'd done this before, so no worries. right? no! obviously not! why do i remember this with such visceral clarity three weeks later?

oh, what's your favorite episode of this TV show? the one i dreamt. yeah, don't worry about it, it didn't make coherent sense, but it was in the feelings, right? my ship had the best fucking scene. no, of course i can't explain it to you, that's madness. it involved a rocking chair. don't worry about it. it's fine. it's super important i don't accidentally reference this in a fic someday, though.

this shit is deranged, dude. missing people who are quite literally my own brain's invention with an actor's face. missing places that are a meld of a movie i saw once, my childhood bedroom, the second floor of my high school, and inter-dimensional space. like. no! no, this shouldn't be a thing! is, though. the clarity of it. just fucking bananas. this has been happening to me my whole goddamn life.

[smarbles]

Can I just say that I really don't like the phrase "feminine rage". It's just being angry and letting that anger out. There's nothing special or ✨uniquely feminine✨ about it and frankly feels both condescending and like more gender essentialist bullshit. Like "oh the rage women feel and how they express it is So Different from the way manly men do it. Here's some videos of attractive white women being angry in movies as proof".

Ik some (probably white) women will disagree but it's a similar level of weird condescension that "girl dinner" and "girl math" is.

[pbeltarts]

Hey! I decided it might be helpful to have a reference post for all the details for the AU. I'll update this periodically as new things are revealed or added. - Bec

General Info

This Au is based on Pixie Hollow and the Tinkerbell movies/books! Most of it will lean on the movie lore, but will borrow some lore from the books as well. I also am making up a lot of lore myself to fill in gaps for the storyline or make the translation from MHA easier.

You can learn more about the lore of Pixie Hollow via the wiki!

>> The Fanfic is out and updating! You can read it here! <<

#MHAPixieHollow

Want to draw or write with the AU and share it? You can use the above hashtag so it'll be connected! I'll try to check this tag regularly so I can share your work! (This should work on tumblr and insta, but I cannot be certain for twitter/bluesky.)

#pixie asks

This is the tag I use on answers to askbox questions involving the AU!

Some General Guidelines:

While my AU has a plot line and is intended to have BKDK as the focus ship, I don't care/mind if you like the designs and want to draw your preferred ship with them! As long as you're nice to others, do what you want! (So even though I'm making this for BKDK, if you like KRBK and like their designs, I don't care if you draw/write that with the AU!)

I do have a storyline for the AU and am working on a fic with that, but! I love seeing others' creativity, so if you want to use the AU for your own writing, feel free! All I ask is that you don't claim anything as "canon" to the AU unless its been stated by me!

Its unlikely I'll be able to design every fairy from 1A or elsewhere, so if I haven't designed them and you want to come up with a design for the AU, do it! I'd love to see it!

If you like any of the art from the AU and want to use it for PFPs/Banners on your social accounts, you're free to do so! I'd prefer credit if you did, thanks!

Most of my work for the AU will be monochrome sketches, so if you want to color them feel free! All I ask is that you properly credit me if you share your coloring.

The Fairies

Izuku aka "Deku" - [design]

Talent: Dust Keeper Alchemy Info: Deku's wings are covered in black veins that creep onto his back and he cannot fly, even with the help of pixie dust. He's given blue pixie dust by All Might and works on alchemy experiments in secret in order to do multiple talents.

Katsuki aka "Kacchan" - [design]

Talent: Fast Flying Info: One of the best fast flyers in Pixie Hollow, he has unique control over the winds. Constantly keeping Deku out of trouble.

Eijirou - [design]

Talent: Animal Talent Info: One of Katsuki's closest friends. He has a best animal friend, a turtle named Boulder, who he visits regularly and takes sun naps on his shell.

Denki - [design]

Talent: Light Talent Info: Playful and excitable, he has a habit of accidentally lighting himself up when excited.

Mina - [design]

Talent: Garden Talent Info: Fun-loving and overly social, she loves calling forward a bunch of colorful petals to surprise others.

Kyouka - [design]

Talent: Music Talent Info: Likes to play her guitar in various places in pixie hollow for her friends. Momo, the tinker fairy, makes and fixes her instruments.

Hanta - [design]

Talent: Scouting Talent Info: Specializes in using vines and ropes to restrain threats. A fairly laid back fairy who likes to bother his friends and laze about when avoiding orders from Hawks, the leader of the Scouting guild.

Ochaco - [design]

Talent: Fast Flying Info: While not the fastest of the flying talents, Ochaco specializes in utilizing winds to create a soft floating affect. She's most useful in helping dandelions find their way to the pixie dust tree or assisting in soft landings.

Shouto - [design]

Talent: Light & Frost Talents Info: Shouto is a unique fairy where two dandelions were growing from the same stalk when it took flight to Pixie Hollow. Because of this, him and his intentional sibling became one when influenced by Pixie dust, making him both a Summer and Winter fairy. Because of this, he can do 2 talents and also survive in both climates for elongated periods of time. However, he cannot stay in one place for a whole year, and regularly has to move between the Summer Glade and the Winter Woods.

Tsuyu - [design]

Talent: Water Talent Info: One of the only Water fairies that willingly gets into water, though she doesn't submerge her wings and only stands in shallow ends. She calls Izuku "Izu-chan."

Tenya - [design]

Talent: Fast Flying Info: A very structured fairy, he doesn't like deviating from his schedule. He's considered possibly the fastest of the fast flying talents but his wind control is lacking.

Hitoshi - [design]

Talent: Dust Keeping Info: Always tired. One of Izuku's closest friends, he'll defend Izuku in his own way from others. Has some unspoken guilt that he maybe somehow was the reason Izuku's wings formed incorrectly.

All Might

Talent: Unknown Info: When acting as king, All Might presents himself in a full-bodied muscled form. But out of the public eye, he presents as a feeble older fairy named Toshinori. The other fairies outside of the Never Council and Fairy Inko don't know that they're the same people, which allows Toshinori to speak comfortably with others and keep an eye on Pixie Hollow from the sidelines. Izuku meets Toshinori and helps him with something, despite the task being far harder without the help of flight, and Toshinori sees how hard Izuku is trying and feels something special about him, so he gives Izuku a supply of blue pixie dust.

More TBA!

Other Characters

Eri

Eri is a human child whose laugh Deku was born from. She lives a difficult life.

Mirio aka "Lemillion"

Mirio is a blonde mouse and Eri's only friend, who attempts to look out for her and make her smile. Eri gave him the nickname "Lemillion" because it sounds like 'lemon' (because of his fur) and how he's 1 in a million.

More TBA!

F.A.Q.

What happened to Deku's wings? Can he not fly?

Deku's wings did not work since his arrival. They look different from others' wings and don't respond to pixie dust, so he cannot take flight. Because he was born from Eri's sorrowful laugh, there was not enough joy in it for him to form correctly. [You can see Deku's Birth comic here!]

What about [insert character name]?

I have plans for most of the main cast from MHA, but not all of them will be fairies. As for other characters, like students from 1B or other NPCs, I don't have solid thoughts for all of them and really only think of them if I plan to insert them into the story so I probably don't have a role for them.

How did Katsuki and Izuku meet?

Katsuki met Izuku on Izuku's arrival day! He was the fairy to see Izuku's dandelion come into Pixie Hollow and aided it to the Pixie Dust Tree. [You can see the comic here!]

Is this a fanfic or comic I can read?

Right now, all that exists are the little snippet comics and drawings I've made. However! I have a storyline in mind for the AU set roughly 6 years after Deku's birth, and I'm going to try to write it! I'll definitely share it when I'm able.

Will there be other ships in the AU other than BKDK?

Probably! But I haven't given it much thought or focus yet.

Can I cosplay your fairy designs?

ABSOLUTELY!! And please show me because I will cry.

Am I allowed to do fanart/write something for the AU?

OF COURSE!!! Please please share it with me too I'd love to see it! You can also use the tag #MHAPixieHollow !

More TBA as needed.

[witherby]

I think a really cool day idea for Conner and mouse would be like the circus scene from Teen Titans were Robin let Starfire try some cotton candy and it’s really cute 



I remember that scene!!! Robin's absolutely lovesick expression was so romantic to me, even back then.

I didn't replicate that one-for-one, but they're certainly at a carnival! I hope you like it!

The Littlest Wayne: Carnival

(features: established relationship, Conner Kent x gn!Reader, fluff, discussions of structures that aren't OSHA compliant, kissing)

Masterlist is Here!

"That doesn't look safe."

"None of these rides really are," you admit, queueing into the line to ride the Wave Swinger with your boyfriend. "Pop-up carnivals are designed in such a way that they can be thrown up and taken down within a day or two. You can't really afford to bolt anything down because it isn't going to be there in a week."

Conner looks at you with incredulity. He looks like he's trying not to pout, which is adorable. You barely refrain from kissing him.

"Then why are we lining up to get on one?"

"S'part of the vibe," you explain, lifting your hands for emphasis. One of them is interlaced with your boyfriend's, so his arm gets swung around, too. "You don't really go to these things to walk around and then leave again. You gotta ride a ride while wondering in the back of your mind if this is how it ends. You gotta spend way too much money playing a rigged game to win a prize that wasn't worth even a third of what you spent to earn it. You gotta eat a bunch of deep-fried foods that shouldn't be deep-fried and feel incredibly nauseated for the next two days about it. That's the real Carnival Experience™."

"This doesn't sound fun, M," Conner says. "I can take you on a flight and pretend to drop you a couple times. I can ask you for an absurd amount of money and not pay it back for like a week. I can cook you dinner and narrowly avoid giving you food poisoning. We don't have to be here."

"Trust me, it wouldn't be the same," you insist, moving up in the line. This swing ride is one of your favorites, next to The Whip, but you haven't seen one of those in a few years. "It's also the atmosphere. You're surrounded by fun, neon colors and happy strangers and screaming children — it's all part of the experience."

"Yeah..." Conner grimaces, gaze a little distant. "I could do without the screaming children."

"Oh, right," you frown, digging out a specialized pair of earbuds from your pocket and offering them to him. They help muffle out extra sensitive sounds for him, like breathing and footsteps and other people's heartbeats, so he can better control what noise he chooses to perceive. "Here."

Conner takes them, briefly letting go of your hand to put them in, then un-tenses his shoulders and offers you a thin smile.

"That's better," he admits, "but I still think getting on rides knowing they aren't bolted down properly is stupid."

"Welcome to the carnival," you grin. You both shuffle forward in the line, close enough now that you'll be able to get on next round. "You're gonna love this."

"I can fly, M. I don't think I'm gonna care."

Then it turns out he cares. He cares a lot. He actually cares so much. When you and Conner get strapped into your seats, he's white knuckling the chains keeping his chair suspended off the ground.

"You're joking. There's one little bike chain keeping me in this chair and there's a single hook on top holding me up. You're actually joking."

You start spinning and twisting around in your own chair, gleeful. "Isn't it great?"

"No??"

"Alrighty riders. Please refrain from bouncing, spinning, twisting, or yanking on the chains. When the ride is in motion do not grab onto other riders' chairs. Keep the strap secure across your waist while the ride is in motion, and do not attempt to remove it until it comes to a complete stop again. Enjoy."

Conner flinches when the chairs lift into the air. He watches the ground get pulled out from under him, shitty carnival music starting to come out of the speakers while the lights on the ride start flashing. If he weren't invulnerable, he'd be losing his mind right now. How are you able to enjoy such risky activities!? Are you insane!? Actually — you're the one civilian child to a family of crime fighting vigilantes. Of course you're insane.

He looks up to make another comment, but the words quickly die in his throat. Because you look stunning.

You look great all the time, of course. Conner loves to look at you, and you know that. But as the ride starts to spin and your chair starts swaying with the wind, you throw your head back and laugh. You spread your arms out to your sides and kick your feet, eyes closed and hair fanned out.

You're practically ethereal when you're having fun. Conner watches the colorful lights dance over your skin and feels himself falling even more in love with you than he already is. He never wants the ride to end, if it means he gets to see you like this forever.

Using the trick Clark taught him, he speeds himself up to slow the world down, giving himself more time to admire you. To you, it's just a couple minutes in the air, but to him it's hours of unbridled admiration. When you're finally lowered to the ground again, he's unlatched himself from his seat and come around to kiss you.

"Let's go find another ride," he mumbles against your lips. You smirk, victorious, and grab his hand. He's utterly helpless to do anything but trail after you.

"Knew you'd come around. It's the Carnival Experience, babe; it pulls everyone in! Never should've doubted me."

"Yeah..." He says, smiling like a lovesick idiot. It's definitely the rides and games and people making him feel this good, and not the echo of your happy heartbeat or the image of your carefree smile under the neon lights burned into his memory. "Shouldn't have doubted you."

[changetyre]

Hold this Papa

SUMMARY: While facing symptoms of your most recent pregnancy Max is tasked with looking after your youngest daughter while on a meeting. Part of the Verstappen Family Verse

WARNINGS: Crack, fluffiness, pregnancy sickness

A/N: Happy Halloween! Enjoy.

"Max don't worry I can-" You were cut off by your wave of nausea forced to take deep breaths in order not to throw up right then and there. 

"Baby, stop it's fine. I can watch her, they'll understand." Max insisted. 

Today Max had an important Zoom meeting with his management team and other team bosses who had been making Max offers which he'd be a fool not to at least listen to. Lea was out with her uncle Lando who'd offered to take her for the day and you were going to stay with Lea and have a girl's day. 

That was until you woke up with the worst nausea of your pregnancy so far. You'd woken up immediately throwing up and had failed to keep much food down all morning. Max offered to cancel everything and take you to the hospital but you knew how important this meeting was and told him you could go after if it was still this bad. 

Max reluctantly accepted but he still knew you wouldn't be able to look after Ivy properly with the state you were in and he very much preferred if you could focus on trying to hydrate and keep some food down for now.

"Hmm I think it's getting better, I haven't thrown up that apple slice I had 10 minutes ago." You commented as the nausea somewhat passed. 

"That's good but I'm still taking Ivy." Max kissed your cheek before walking away needing to hurry for his meeting in 2 minutes. 

"Fine. But if she's too much trouble just send me a text and I'll come grab her." You hollered as he walked out. 

"Okay," Max yelled back before picking Ivy up from the living room where she had been playing and taking her inside his office which was still big enough for Ivy to remain entertained as he had brought in a few of her toys as well. "Okay, Ivy stay in here okay? Papa's going to be on a phone call so we have to be quiet but if you need something come to whisper to me okay." Max explained to his daughter. 

"Okay, papa." Ivy giggled not fully grasping the instructions but already too entertained with a toy she'd picked up from the floor. 

Max smiled kissing his daughter's head before walking over to his desk where he quickly connected to his Zoom call. 

"Morning Max, how's y/n doing?" Raymond, Max's manager who had been alerted of the possible disruptions asked. 

"Morning, uh, still feeling pretty poorly but she's putting a brave face on for me at the moment." Max answered polity. 

"Papa." Max heard the hushed voice of his daughter beside him looking down to see her handing him a Barbie doll.

"Thank you, Ivy." Max took it from her quickly muting himself as the meeting began. Ivy ran away happily. 

Max locked his focus into the meeting as soon as crucial information began to play out, taking a small notebook out he jotted down important points and questions he might have to discuss at the end so apart from a few glances to check his daughter wasn't in actual danger Max didn't fully process what his daughter was getting up to. 

"Papa hold this." Ivy ran back to Max handing him a wooden block which Max took and placed on his lap alongside the barbie he'd been previously given. 

"To be fully honest with you I care about the car, I need a good car and right now, dismissing the last few races, RedBull has given me a good consistent car, what are your guarantees?" Max asked. 

"Hold this papa." Ivy had once again run over to Max handing him a coloring book. Max took it without question looking down and noticing a variety of toys on his lap he had no recollection of receiving.

Looking back to the meeting he noticed Raymond struggling to keep a straight face as Ivy once again walked into the frame handing Max a tiara. "Put it on papa," Ivy whined when Max simply added it to the array of toys on his lap. 

"Shh okay Ivy." Max accepted not wanting to upset his daughter further putting the tiara on his head. 

"Looking good Max." Everyone collectively laughed in the meeting. 

"Just girl dad things." Max laughed with them. 

Luckily Ivy seemed to entertain herself with this for most of the meeting simply filling Max's lap with things as well as handing him things to wear but it also seemed to tire her out. Just as the meeting was wrapping up Ivy walked over to her dad once more. 

"Papa up." Ivy whined. 

Max happily picked up his daughter letting everything on his lap fall to the floor to set her down on his lap. "I'm almost done, Ivy." Max kissed his daughter's cheek as she wrapped her small arms around his neck resting her head on his chest. 

"Papa I miss mommy." Ivy sighed. 

"I know baby I miss her too, I'm almost done." Max rubbed his daughter's back soothingly. 

It didn't take much longer for the meeting to finally end but once it did Max looked down to see his daughter fast asleep in his arms.  

Walking back outside with Ivy in his arms he was relieved to find you in the kitchen having a proper meal which looked to be almost done. "How are you feeling my love?" Max asked you. 

"Aww my sweet baby." You first acknowledged your sleeping daughter giving her back a rub before answering Max. "Much better, I had a smoothie before this and managed to keep it all down." 

"That's great schatje." Max leaned down to kiss you. "Let me put Ivy in her bed then we can cuddle for a bit." 

"Sounds perfect." You smiled happily. "No more vomiting please." You spoke down to your bump jokingly. 

Despite the harder pregnancy, everything was perfect. 

[deesseshesca]

PAC: How do y’all feel about each other sexual energy ? (18+)

(SINGLE SINCE BIRTH - ERA ~3 )

Haven't slept since last night...

Hello Chérie d'Amour !

How y'all doing ? Hope those last few days have been treating u better than me. When it comes to me is time for me to take a real break. I'm going to be inactive for a month. I am so sorry for my single babe since birth, it was finally your turn to thrive but don't worry, I try to create some good juicy content before I leave for a moment. All readings will be on sale up until this weekend because of recession. I feel like you guys need to catch a break but keep in mind you will only receive the product in May 2025. In April everything will to back to regular prices. That being said, I hope April brings you nothing but success.

MUCH LOVE,

SHESCA.

PILE 1 

YOU : You feel that he has experiences and you are one on his list of potential lovers. I am not going to lie before I even get further, this does not feel like romantic love. It could be platonic love with sex (FWB or sexual arrangement) at least from your side. I don't know if that's how y’all relationships begin or how it was always supposed to be. Ahhh… now lets go. You can sense the deep desire he has for you. Maybe he has prey eyes when he lays them on you. May have possessive  mannerism  with you. Also may tell you to go around and tell others you are his because he hates the thought that anyone can even think they have a chance with you. I just heard: “ You are too pretty for your own good”. You do applaud the fact that he never cares and always show you off no matter the circumstance. Not the type to be disrespectful. May actually be quite the feminist not the performative kind. You may never think he cares so much for women rights because he dont look like it. May have a darker or alternative aesthetic. If not then has the aesthetic of somebody that dont care for women rights : pick up car, bible verse tatted, country accent and love hunting. Actually very emotionally available yet avoidant. Which mean he can express himself and can be transparent with his feelings. Probably dealt with his childhood trauma, not the type to ghost after fucking you. Actually take care of you and give some aftercare. Asking you if you are "ok", before the act and after. Clean you up and tell you he leaves before doing it so you dont wake up feeling funny. Would hate for you to feel use. Avoidant because he can't see himself being in a relationship because he dont think he deserves it. You can feel all this by the way he treats you right but can't seem to give you the title you desire. Want you to be his, act like you are his and don't mess with other people, yet don't want to ask you out properly. You can feel like his manifesting you. What I mean by that, is that you are going to see him grow. From running from you, to trying, to loving you and appreciating you. He wants you, you can see it in his eyes, his actions and his words. You feel like one of most prize objects in his life, he treats you as such and you know that you are all he wants.  Also he has a big dick. To my virgin babe don't worry, he is no monster. Will probably do a lot of foreplay and y'all may also have many nights that all you do is oral sex prepping for the big gun. If you are a virgin, he is very scared of hurting you. 

HIM : 

Before anything : I hear and see you caressing his cheek while saying: “My baby, my baby…” with a sad tone. 

They fucking love is crazy. At first I was unsure and I would be the first to tell you to run the fuck away from something, y’all know me. I don't play those games. 

HE FUCKING LOVES EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU ! The way you look, the color of your hair, your hairstyle, if is curly or not, the color of your eyes, the way it light up, the shape of your face, the face you make when he fuck you, he loves you body, every inch. Clothes or nah, he is fucking turn on all the time when it comes to you. The style you have, nails or nah, lashes or nah, makeup or nah, shave or nah. He loves the sound of your voice, the moan you make when he's thrusting deep into you, the way you talk dirty and the way you tease him with nudes, the way  you end up play hard to get it just for the fuck of it. The reality is you guys meet when he just came out of the dark night of the soul. He just fought suicidal thought maybe even survive an attempt. He may be clean from self harm tendency or his sober from substances. He’s still in woods but his not dancing with the devil no more. You are going to force your way into his life. He is a loner and he dont like to mingle but you are coming in with your zest for life … LOL ! What you don't know is that you are the sun of his life. Just by existing you bring him all the joy, life never thought worth giving him. Don't get me wrong it aint co-dependent. He doesn't live because of you. Nah he lived so he could found you. Going back to him, he is too fucking tired to start fighting his avoidant issue but without realizing it he will be growing with you. You are going to enter his life when he is in the 8 cup era( me : surprise the card did not come up) , like he let go of something but he is not yet sure of the next path but knows he must leave so he did. Your warmth  ( dang all I wanted was the sex … here I am in love reading) is something he yearns for. He will often hit you  up, so he can spend your work break with you in his car so you guys can cuddle. He will hit up after work so he can see you. He will beg to see you. Not for sex just to sleep. If he has night terror, you make them stop. Don't worry you ain't got no super power, it's just because he feels safe in your embrace. In my visions regarding your couple, he is always sleeping. Damn y’all fav spot is your bedroom. Lol … babe don't take it personally but he see you as a liability. No job asking for princess treatment just eating and using all his money. He would love how wet you get. You are going to make him feel like his dick has super power in the bedroom because he can make you squirt. To my virgin no worries is actually bound to happen since he's big and you go that WAP. You guys may develop a size kink together. 

PREVIOUS READING

2. PAC (FREE ) : PAC : Your first & maybe only love reaction to seeing you naked for the first time (Babe gather your coins because there's no more free content in the future, xoxo.)

PILE 2

YOU : You feel as tho he has a breeding kink. He loves nutting in you or loves seeing his cum on your tits, your butt, stomach or your face. A fan of facial. You may have a very pretty face, a bit childish, don't worry he aint a pedophile. You have a round face, very chubby cheek, and round deer eyes, may have a rather coquette or very feminine aesthetic. I am seeing light makeup, you may like to get doll up before y’all fuck. Don't act all innocent; you enjoy seeing the aftermath of y’all encounter. You get all doll up, so you can see the wig lifting (if you wear one), your makeup mush, you lips red, the hickeys on your body  or even like seeing your clothes tear down on the floor after the act is over (me: you guys are literally the representation of the quote : I love pink, violence and sex). You know he has a good sex reputation. He may have been a player until he decided to settle with you. You knew it and he never tried to hide it. If you guys do end up break up, he is forever going to be the best sex you ever had. The man knows what the fuck he is doing. You are not here for the sex tho. He knows it. You are here because he get you. Maybe people around expected you to act a certain way, you may attend private school, may be the oldest sibling in your family, may hold a job with power, whatever the situation is, you are held to a higher standard than the rest. Some of you may be the daughter of a pastor or religious important figure. With him, you get open up and even do stuff that would not be allowed by people around you. Having sex may be forbidden in your family before marriage. You may also smoke with him and drink 2. You guys talk to each other about hardship and he just gets it. The thing is pile 2, is like you guys are living in a golden cage. You have gone through so much trauma but you can't talk about it because there's almost a policy of : “ you hear nothing, see nothing and speak of nothing” in y’all family. I’m hearing the song of Pretty Little Liars. They have a darker aesthetic and they are more of a loner so you would think they are the one with the destructive habits but is all you. Now that I’m thinking about it, you may be the only one smoking and drinking when y'all are together and he just makes sure you don't go overboard. You may actually be the one asking him to go this hard in the bedroom. What's funny (not really), you don't feel like he loves you for you. You think, I am writing black on white, you think he only loves you for your tight pussy. You know I dont stand for BS so imma be very honest babes. He aint the problem. Y’all seriously hate yourself very deeply. It's really sad. I did not say I pity you but it breaks my heart, sensing the depth in which you hate your own gut. You see him as an enemie. Almost as a war weapon … I aint playing Chérie d’Amour. You make me think of the way Katniss thought of Peeta in the book of Hunger Games (the first ones). In reality, you don't think no one could ever love you. 

PS : You also feel like he is very emotional. Is easy for him to cry and he doesn't hide himself when he does so. He would cry a front of a kid show or while listening to the news. He may actually stay from the news because he easily absorbs emotions around that. A truth empath … LOL ! He is very loving in the way he dirty speak, I am hearing: “ Look at me …”, “ Is ok I’m here …”, “ You are doing amazing love …” 

HIM: 

I ain't going to lie, this is toxic. Not the yelling, verbally or physically abusive type of toxic. No breaking each other's spirit . Is more the type he wants to save you from you  and you are incapable to stop destroying yourself. Don't get him wrong, he ain't got no savior complex but he sees so much potential in you… yet all you see is his flaws and nothing is really changing your mind. If he is the one reading … RUN ! But since is you, there's nothing I can do but watch. Congrats you have manifested your first relationship  ( I swear I mean it with no sarcasm). There's a lot of lessons here. This may be your wake up call because you are the one closest on in this PAC getting in a relationship. May even happening this Aries season. Is not a matter of “if” but a matter of “when”. 

He feel like you have a facade because he can sense all you truly crave is softeness. You don't actually want this hardcore sex, you want something softer. Otherwise you will want to be degrated, the fact that you prefer him talking in a softer tone, caressing you and holding you when the act is done shows your true intention. You hide behind that tough cover. In front of people you play the perfect innocent daughter while in front of him you play this though women that nothing sacred anymore. He can also feel that you are disgusted by the fact that you do desire love and affection. He doesn't want you just for your tight pussy. He love the depth you have and the beauty you hold. You are a very pretty babe in his eyes, the prettiest woman he ever laid his gaze  upon. Also he’s in love with the poetic tone you give to your pain. You could quite literally love writing  poems or being a writer in your free time. You may play an instrument or love singing. He enjoys listening to you talking about philosophy for hours even tho he doesn't always agree with you. For him, you guys together are the embodiment of the song : Dark Paradise - Lana Del Rey. He feels like you are wasting your time with him. You deserve so much more than him. He ain't going nowhere. He feels like you only want him close to you just so you can hurt him. You wish you could destroy people around you but instead you keep hurting his love with fake promises and treating him like he is replaceable. He won't leave because he actually enjoys this arrangement.  If it is the only way for him to have you then that is how it must be. He may have a Mars in Scorpio or in Pisces. 

PS : Now I understand, he aint innocent either. While you destroy yourself with hate, substance and sex. He destroys himself by finding people he knows are going to hurt him. Is more than the victim complex, is the martyr. If he aint in pain then he ain't living. Right now in the spiritual world you are like falling stars colliding into each other and nobody is stopping you because there's life changing lessons that must happen. 

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2. PAC (FREE ) : PAC : Your first & maybe only love reaction to seeing you naked for the first time(Babe gather your coins because there's no more free content in the future, xoxo.)

PILE 3 

YOU: You are extremely grateful for all his exes. You thank them for the way they tame his masculinity and raise him to be an amazing bf. You are grateful for his sisters for showing what is it to actually deal a real women. Most importantly his mom for making him a gentleman. You feel like he loves trying new stuff in the bedroom and dont mind doing it in places that are not traditional. Everytime he grabs you, you don't know in which position you are going to be. He may love going round after rounds with no break ( me : Shit that a whole workout). May be the type to start making out in the car in broad day light with the windows down because he never gave a fuck. Will probably introduce you to sex toys, nothing crazy ladies. He ain't your BDSM type at all but his masculinity never was scared of a pink dildo or a rose toy ( amen to that !). You feel like he has multiple options. You see people flirting with him in front of you like you don't exist. You may keep your relationship private because when you post him, people add him with no shame. Also you applaud the effort he put in the bedroom. He put in the work. Coming in with new techniques  like the pillow or the bear hug. There's something about the way his hip moves, like he is going to hit your g-spot like nobody damn business. Over and over again at that. 

PS : Your first relationship may be an interracial one. For him, you're the first woman of that race he actually dated, not that he found you kind ugly, he just never had a chance to date one of y’all. Also don't worry, no fetishes, purely in love with learning your culture with respect. 

HIM :He feels like you have no idea of your sexual needs. Don't get him wrong,  he knows you are a virgin so you don't know how to move but the problem is that you don't seem to even know what you want. It's almost like you have literally no idea what sex is. Like a new concept falling from the sky. You are acting like you are a pre-teen who just now learned about sex. On the other hand he enjoys the way you are spontaneous many claim to be but they are not. There's a difference between being spontaneous and adventurous and people don't seem to know it. He loves the way you are down for anything at any moment. Which he always craved and missed in his last relationship. Going back to what I wrote, he feels like you are like a doll with no opinion. You just go with whatever he says with no real back bone. You don't tell him if you like what he just did. You don't show different emotions depending on different position or touch. You are just here looking at him nodding. He enjoys your moans but would prefer if you could appreciate him more in the bedroom. Don't get me wrong, he doesn't expect you to have the vocabulary of a porn star but tell him he's doing a good job. Telling him is hitting the right spot, telling him he's handsome and telling him you have been craving him. At the end of the day he aint stress because he is sure y’all are going to figure it out. It's just the beginning of your sexual journey and he knows with time and patience you are going to open up to him. 

PS: He knows you are nervous. The first time y’all are going to do it, you may actually be anxious. I see you looking around nervous and having jabbing movements. You will open up about the fact that you are not sure you can satisfy him. What you don't realize is just the thought of you, turning him on sooooo bad. He can't sleep without taking a cold shower because he is always sexually frustrated when it comes to you. You are literally his dream girl. Trust me babe, no need to worry, you are his female fantasy. 

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2. PAC (FREE ) : PAC : Your first & maybe only love reaction to seeing you naked for the first time(Babe gather your coins because there's no more free content in the future, xoxo.)

PILE 4 

YOU : You love the fact that he makes you feel wanted. You feel like you are the object of his desire. He makes you feel like he can't make a move without you in his life. Without you his life ain't complete. He makes you feel super sexy, always begging you for a pic of you. Not caring if it is a selfie, a nude or even just an OOTD. I see you taking a bunch of pictures that you keep in a folder for when he is needy of your presence but can't be near. Also you can sense how he gets no pleasure being in the dominant role of the relationship. For some of y’all, he will take the lead in public. For the other in this pile, he will be walking around unafraid to show how much of a simp he is.For the first type, he may be very tall and loves going to the gym. He cares for the finer things in life, I see luxurious cars and watches. He may work a white collar job and hold a title of power ranging from manager to CEO. Not the time to talk a lot, have a rather deep voice and have a mug face normally. While for the other he’s a student, shorter, may be older than you but have a baby  face. The first one would be the type to text you that he is waiting at your door, giving you unexpected surprise and making sure everyone knows you are taken because he is possessive. While the other may be the type to follow you around, be down with all your sidequest, take your picture like one of your fans and always have this fool expression on his face when it comes to you. You may tell him what to do but he will always pay for everything and give you the princess treatment. They both have something in common, they love to be dominated. Love it when you play with them. Edge theme, tell them “no” just to hear them whine, don't worry it won't be on your first time but will love it when you use toys on them 2. Will love it even more if you bound them in beautiful pink ribbons. Loves when you challenge them not to make a single noise or they wont get to fuck you tonight. They make you feel love. There's not a single doubt in your mind and others that he loves you. By the way he acts, speaks about you when you ain't there or even takes care of you like  you are the most delicate being on this planet. Whether it be with letters, text you poem, buy flowers or when he travels and always comes back with something that reminds them of you. The way they refuse to end FaceTime because they want to sleep and wake up to you. Scream to any women approaching  them that their fucking taken may wear a fake marriage ring to seal the deal because the mere fact that other women may flirt with them piss them off. 

PS : The biggest munch alive. Will literally cry if you don't let them taste your delicious pussy. 

HIM:He knows you are very strict, you don't play mind games. Your standard are high and you don't mind cutting a man off mid date, mid convo or even relationship if you don't feel respected. At the same time he knows your love can never go bad. You are not really the type to talk about the feelings, you are more the type to show it in your actions. The fact that you bake  for him, your eyes light up when you look at him, your voice softens when you speak to him or even the way your body relaxes when you touch him. On the other hand, he still can sense a blockage in you. It's like you are always waiting for him to fail. You never allow yourself to enjoy the bliss of this relationship. Waiting for him to become abusive, waiting for him to start yelling, waiting for him to start breaking shit around or even start cheating. Just so you can say : “ I knew it ! You can't trust this man, frl, frl.” The issue with this way of thinking is undervaluing the efforts put in by your partner and he also makes him feel like he is constantly passing a test. That may be a big red flag for him that he will consider the worthiness in longevity in your relationship. I see him entering the relationship knowing he found the one. I also sense he can let go, if he ever feels like he can't give you what you truly desire.

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2. PAC (FREE ) : PAC : Your first & maybe only love reaction to seeing you naked for the first time(Babe gather your coins because there's no more free content in the future, xoxo.)

[pumkinzee]

BED CHEM ˏˏ PERCY JACKSON - MDNI!

summary: you try to seduce Percy with your clumsiness, and in the end it all ends up in the chemistry in bed that you've had since you started dating.

pairing: Percy Jackson x gn!reader

tw: smut, first time, whining, inexperience, unprotected sex (this is fiction, beware!) the reader has no gender

⌑ - English isn't my first language so I'm using a translator and my basic knowledge of the language!

𝐑equest 𝐨pens! + 𝐫ules!

You were a little dumb, just a little, but you had a big heart. It was thanks to your clumsiness that you couldn't notice the signals that Percy was sending you. For example, the time you were at the campfire surrounded by campers, you were sitting on a log, apart from the rest roasting marshmallows, telling horror stories and singing.

Percy snaked his hand up your thigh and kept it there for a while, tracing your exposed skin thanks to your shorts, then he brought his hand up dangerously and...you jumped, moving from your spot because a mosquito had bitten you on the other leg.

There was also the time when you were playing on the same team to capture the flag, he had cornered you against a tree while he started flirting and to some extent you had taken the hint! but then you diverted the topic like any demigod with ADHD would do and disappeared all the tension that Percy had worked so hard to create.

And finally! That time after dinner when he whispered to you “I want dessert” as he leaned in to kiss your jaw and you responded “we can steal cookies!” walking away innocent? Ouch, he had blue balls.

Well, he was patient because he loved you. Oh, I must have loved you so much.

But you finally realized his intentions! You were playing truth or dare with your friends, among them a few Aphrodite girls. When the nozzle of the bottle landed on you the eyes of everyone in the room flew in your direction, making you chuckle nervously not knowing what to say. One of the Aphrodite girls smiled machiavellianly and blurted out the question without thinking about the consequences.

“Are you a virgin?”

Your cheeks flushed with burning embarrassment and you had to clear your throat. "M-Me? Well, the thing is...okay, yes, I am.”

Everyone in the room remained silent, some even gasped in disbelief. Little by little, truth or dare was forgotten.

“HE HAS NEVER PROPOSED TO YOU?”

"Of course!" One of your friends interrupted, responding to Aphrodite's girl. “I saw them that night at the bonfire!”

“What night at the bonfire?” You inquired. All eyes returned to you. "What?"

"Haven't you two done nothing yet?”

“D-Do what?”

“Oh, gods.” Your friend put her arm around your shoulders. “Today is going to be a long night for you two.”

Cabin three wasn't the warmest, its color selection was never the best, all those blue tones made it dark and cold at night. Percy was bored in his cabin, completely bored, he hated curfews and that you couldn't stay with him. With him, in bed. He ran his hands over his face and pushed any perverted thoughts out of his head, but it wasn't that easy.

There was something about your innocence regarding his sexual approaches and intentions that made him extremely horny, he had to remind himself to be a gentleman, that you had your limits, that pushing you against his bed beneath him was wrong. Very badly.

But, in his defense, He was a hormonal teenager who was beginning to despair at the touch of his lover. Then, he remembered that he had a hand, and with all the shame in the world and the little dignity he had left, he decided to use it.

He started rubbing his crotch with his hand, starting to breathe a little heavier. He didn't like touching himself directly without first warming up, so he gritted his teeth and continued rubbing his palm, beginning to hiss as the speed increased. He was desperate, longing to get hard so he could touch himself properly.

He began to imagine that it was your hand instead of his, which made him throw his head back until it hit the pillows, letting out a small moan as he remembered that he was alone. 

He rolled his eyes, a satisfied smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he felt he was hot enough and had tortured himself enough, reaching into his boxers and moving his hips for friction.

“PERSEUS!” You shouted, kicking open the door to his cabin. “I just realized I'm the stupidest person in the world!”

Your scream startled him enough to pull his hand out of his pants and cover himself with the sheet, sitting on the bed against the headboard. He watched you pacing in circles, with a sort of irritation and embarrassment, seeing as your cheeks were red. His breathing was still labored from his previous activities, but he managed not to get your attention.

"What?" He gasped, managing to moderate his breathing with one last sigh. "What happened?"

Deciding to stop being stupid, you approached his bed, climbing onto it and almost sitting on his lap if it weren't for the fact that it wasn't your purpose. You pointed an accusing finger at him. "How long have you been thinking to fuck me?"

His eyes widened in surprise, and his face turned red. It caught him completely off guard. The sheet began to rise again as his cock instantly hardened at your sudden honesty and your finger pointing at him. 

"W-what? No! I meant... Shit!"

“I knew it, everyone knew it except me!” You sat on his lap, on something hard, to be exact, you covered your face with your hands.

He swallowed nervously, feeling your weight rest directly on his now rock-hard erection. "H-Hey, y-you're making me look like a pervert." He chuckled, though he was tongue-tied, hands hanging awkwardly at his sides before finally finding a place to rest on your hips.

"It's not fair! Everyone notices except me."

Percy let out a sigh, ignoring how good it felt that you were unconsciously rubbing against him, creating delicious friction on his now aching cock. He smiled understandingly and gave you a kiss on the forehead. 

"Hey, calm down. You're overthinking it too much." He laughed, clearing his throat. “Sometimes you're just…clueless.”

“Clueless.” You repeated, almost as a mockery of yourself. “How clueless?”

“Long enough to accidentally sit on my cock, baby.”

Your cheeks lit up like freshly set off fireworks, just as you were about to refuse, Percy cupped your cheeks with his hands and leaned in to kiss you. What started as a tender comforting kiss gradually turned into a more passionate kiss, with Percy licking your bottom lip to ask for access. You gasped, opening your mouth and letting his tongue slide inside your mouth, tangling with your tongue until it took over.

His hands moved from your cheeks to your waist, his thumbs tracing lazy patterns, his fingers trailing down to the hem of your shirt, hiding under it and caressing your skin: you both broke away from the kiss, panting and pulling your foreheads together, made eye contact until he decided to say the inevitable

“Can…can I take this from you?”

You nodded, biting your lip. You pulled away slightly and Percy removed your pajama shirt, leaving it on the floor. His hands shook inevitably as he traced his fingers down your sides and every exposed bit of skin he'd ever seen. He licked his lips.

You stole a kiss from him, now you being the one trailing your hands down to the hem of his shirt, you didn't even have to ask, he pulled away from the kiss to desperately fast pull his shirt off over his head, leaving it on the floor next to yours.

He didn't have much body hair but he wasn't hairless either, he counted a happy trail and some chest hair.He blushed in embarrassment, remembering that he hadn't shaved that morning, you, on the other hand, licked your lips, unable to look away from...him.

You leaned in to kiss his neck, he tilted his head back instinctively, growingling in pleasure as he let you shape a path of kisses, bites and a couple of marks down his neck and chest, his pajama pants tightening as you reached his abdomen.

You kept making out for a while longer, groping the ground with your hand on his chest and his on your waist, almost moving down to your ass.

“Do we have protection?” You whispered, practically against his lips.

“I have a big sword." He responded, smiling mischievously.

You smiled back, smashing your lips against his again. You reached out to reach his nightstand, starting to rummage through the drawers, soon you stopped paying attention to the kiss and walked away a little, frowning.

“Where are the condoms?”

It took him a moment to understand what you were saying, his face turning red. “Oh, you meant that protection." He tried to joke, though nervousness leaked into his voice, shifting uncomfortably beneath you.

You raised an eyebrow. "Are you ok?"

“Y-Yes, I'm fine, I'm fine.” He rolled his eyes, still smiling strangely. "Well-"

“Percy, where are the condoms?”

“We don’t have any.”

There was a long awkward pause with eye contact involved.

“I wasn't planning on having my first time today.” He added.

You sat on the bed, each on one end, nervous. If there was no condom, there would be no sex, right? That was what his mom had taught him about sex education, a very awkward talk about how to take care of himself, and now he would suddenly have his first time with the love of his life and he didn't have a single contraceptive.

"Dry sex?" you suggested.

He shook his head. "I want something real."

"Oral?" you said again, but quickly changed your mind. "No, not oral, I want something inside." You said to yourself. "Toys?"

"We don't have any."

"How about we fuck...without a condom?"

Percy's eyes widened as he turned to look at you, dumbfounded with surprise. He shut it quickly, swallowing saliva with difficulty. "Wait... wait a second." He held up a hand, his voice barely a whisper. "Are you seriously suggesting we... we have unprotected sex?"

You blushed, lowering your gaze for a few moments, before plucking up your courage and raising it again, looking at him.  "What...what else do we do?"

"I mean, you're right, but..." Percy's voice trailed off as he considered. He knew he should say no, that it was irresponsible and dangerous. But the idea of finally being inside you without any barriers was incredibly tempting. "Fuck," he muttered, running his hand through his hair again. "Fine.”

You lay back on the bed, propping yourself up on your elbows and unconsciously spreading your legs, Percy's breath caught at the sight of you sprawled on his bed, an irresistible invitation at the sight of you now completely naked. His eyes darkened with lust and he licked his lips unconsciously. Percy removed his pants and boxers, biting his lip as he moved, reaching between your legs. He lined himself up at your entrance, leaning down to bring your foreheads together, kissing you Eskimo tenderly.

"I love you." He whispered with bated breath. "I'm gonna go in slowly."

You nodded, almost letting out a squeal as you spread your legs wider, inviting him into you. You brought his hands up and rested them on your shoulders, biting your lip as you looked down, watching his member throb, desperate to bury itself inside you.

"Shit," he cursed under his breath, his heart pounding at the thought of bareback sex. "Last chance to change your mind," he warned, clutching his throbbing erection in his hand. "I'm not exactly small." He positioned himself at your entrance.

"Okay." You gasped in anticipation, reassuring him. You brought one of your hands up to his cheeks, giving him a comforting kiss. "I can take it.”

Percy's eyes bore into yours and he sensed the need and love in your gaze. It was all the permission he needed. He held your hips tightly and slowly penetrated you, inch by inch. He moaned deeply as he felt your warmth enveloping him completely.

He bottomed out completely, the sensation was overwhelming. No condom could compare to this sensation. You moaned so loud you swore the nymphs outside the cabin had heard you. You pulled your head back, ran your hands up from his cheeks to his shoulders, scratching the skin as you arched your back on the bed.

"My God," he whispered, standing still for a moment to maintain control. "Jesus Christ..." A shudder ran through him. "Don't move, just... don't move."

Percy stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity, trying to calm himself. But every second that passed only made the sensation more intense. You rolled your eyes, feeling tears gather at the corners of your eyes, reached out and dug your nails into his shoulders again, giving him a scratch, reacting by moving your hips slightly.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he gasped, digging his fingers into your hips. "It's just... fuck, you're so tight and hot and.... goddamn." He leaned over you, his chest heaving with labored breathing. 

"Can you move, p-please move."

"I'm trying not to cum already. Just... give me a second," he gasped, closing his eyes tightly. Slowly, with agonizing slowness, he withdrew almost completely before sinking back down, a shudder running through his body. "Holy Shit!"

"Holy shit!" you shrieked, feeling the tears pooling at the corners of your eyes spilling down your cheeks.

Percy paused, kissing your cheeks, standing still inside you so you could both get used to the sensation. He gasped, pulling out before entering deeply again slowly, not wanting to hurt you, he moaned hoarsely, grabbed your leg and put it over his shoulder, gaining a better angle to enter even deeper into you.

He whimpered, feeling a spasm that made him lay his forehead against your shoulder.

“Damn it,” you cursed as the slight movement set him off. He lunged again, slamming you deep and making you tremble beneath him. “Too sensitive!” he hissed, standing still again.

“You're too sensitive? I'm the one with a dick inside!” you moaned, squirming.

Percy couldn't help but let out an airless chuckle, he almost came again until his tip was the only thing inside you and he buried himself deep, stifling a moan as he concentrated on biting into your shoulder and neck. He mimicked these movements a few more lunges until he finally managed to establish a steady rhythm that balanced comfort with pleasure, for it had stopped hurting you when Percy thrust in and out as it had at first.

You rolled your eyes as Percy's cock pressed a precise spot in you, arching your back and scratching his back, aware that they would surely leave a mark the next morning.

“”Th-there, r-right there!‘’

“Fuck.”" He gasped, picking up speed, his hand wrapping your leg over his shoulder more possessively. “Y-you're so tight.”

“Shit...more.”

“More? Holy shit, you're going to make me...F-FUCK!”

With a higher pitched moan than you thought his voice would allow him to utter, long strings of semen shot out inside you, filling you completely, you felt it like an eternity, feeling that warm liquid building up inside you and later it would fill you with trouble, but, just, later.

You both gasped quite a lot, Percy pulled away from the hollow of your neck and spread loving kisses all over your face, making you chuckle despite being extremely overstimulated.

“I love you.” He gave you an Eskimo kiss. "Gods, I love you, you're the best. You feel so fucking good."

“I love you too.” You wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him a messy but love-filled kiss. “You're huge.”

“I warned you.”

“Shut up, don't even start.” You laughed out loud, giving him another messy loving kiss.

He cleaned you up with his powers, since you were both a sticky mess, promised himself that next time he would give you better aftercare, changed the sheets and gave you some of his shirts to wear, getting into bed with you lying against his chest. He stroked your hair as he told you little insignificant stories that didn't even make sense, he was just rambunctious and still somewhat stimulated, so once he felt calmer and better assimilated that you two had had your first time, he gave you a kiss on your forehead.

“Good night, my love.” He murmured into your hair, realizing you were already sound asleep. He gently closed his eyes. “I love you.”

a/n: it cost me a lot to do this, tumblr wouldn't stop bothering me with their "content warnings" (pinche tumblr me la pelas) and because I have no idea how to make smut. I'm asexual, so be patient with me, I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED IT

©pumkinzee

[aestherin]

I CAN SEE YOU

track 06: our little secret

NOTE: update streak hello who is this 😶😧

Scaramouche woke up to an onslaught of messages, mainly coming from his manager. The man grunted as he sat up, brushing stray pieces of hair up and away from his face.

"The fuck does he want?" He mumbled.

What welcomed him was several reminders about today's meeting, a number of messages respectfully asking if he's already up and preparing to leave, and a myriad of panicked texts for him to hurry the fuck up and go as soon as possible because the artist he approved was already there.

Scaramouche frowned as he started to get ready. Before doing so, however, he sent a quick reply to his manager — the text reading, 'OTW'.

A lie, of course.

As he was brushing his teeth, his phone lit up from another notification.

ManagerWhat were you even doing up late last night that you woke up so late today?

He didn't bother to reply.

There was no way he'd admit that he was up all night beefing with his own fans and badmouthing his own name.

Due to lack of time (and energy), the man just settled on a black long-sleeved shirt for a top, and then trousers of the same color. He didn't even bother putting his lenses on, deciding to just wear his glasses instead.

He took one last glance at the time displayed on his phone and cussed, before finally closing the door of his condo unit.

---

"Sorry I'm late." Scaramouche apologized as he entered the meeting room. "I hope the meeting isn't done yet?"

"It is, actually," said his manager, obviously a little disappointed at his artist's lack of punctuality.

'No! What do you mean it's over?!' You internally screamed. The Scaramouche just arrived and now he's announcing that meeting's adjourned? This is why people say life isn't fair!

You haven't even looked at him properly yet!

You immediately looked away earlier as soon as you realized it was him who went through the door. Will you forever swear at yourself for that? Most definitely. But this is all just too much to take in!

You were just looking for Scaramouche earlier, and now he's actually here. Now he's actually here and you're hiding and shying away from him. Wow. You're starting to think you're really your self's biggest enemy.

"Oh."

"But, since you're here anyway, I think you can start talking with Miss [Name] here?" The manager suggested, making you whip your head fast towards his direction at the mention of your name.

"Miss [Name], for the specifics and details of the album, you can ask Scaramouche here. He's the singer you'd be making a cover for." He motioned towards the young man clad in full black and left.

Left. Along with the other staff.

What the heck?!

You took a deep breath before pretending to fix your things, doing the most just to avoid initiating a conversation. Damn. All the years of social training your parents made you go through just all went down the drain. Really? All it takes is a man with godly songwriting skills (and insane visuals) to make you malfunction?

You weren't raised like this!

"Hi," he breathed. "Nice to meet you, [Name]."

You paused.

Your eyes meet, and he tenses.

Only for a short while, before donning a polite smile and offering his hand.

You took it, then reflected the very smile he gave you. Scaramouche fails to notice how his grip slightly tightened, but your nerves were just too sensitive to his touch that you immediately felt it.

Thankfully, he let you go.

"Nice to meet you too, mister...?" You uttered, unsure. "Scaramouche?"

He scoffed. "Drop the mister, I think we're around the same age anyway."

Scaramouche grabbed a random chair, the one nearest, which ended up in him seating next to you. You internally thanked all the archons that the meeting room was spacious enough for the chairs not to be too close to each other.

He sat lazily, back fully rested against the leather material of the chair. He crossed one ankle over his knee, before finally resting his elbow on the edge of the desk.

"So, uhm..."

"Mhm?"

"May I ask what the album I'll be making a cover for is going to be about?"

He smirked. "I don't know."

Scaramouche's smirk stretches into a grin when he noticed how you failed to mask the bemusement on your face.

"Uh, sorry, what?"

"I haven't written it yet."

"But I was told... by your manager..."

A soft snicker escapes his lips, before he meets your eyes once more.

"Shh." His grin remains as he places a finger against his lips. "It's our little secret, alright?"

I CAN SEE YOU — scara x reader smau

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[spiderfriend]

in need of dgs/tgaa character ref sheets? i got you!!

i posted a thread of these on twitter quite a while ago but i only just realized i never posted to tumblr- so here you go! in this google drive folder you will find reference sheets like the one above for most of the characters in dgs, including wagahai and toby! it should be spoiler free unless you open the spoiler folder. i also have a folder of all of the character models i have ripped from the game so that anyone can open them in blender! i even have the model for the old bailey in there in case you need a reference for it! (some of the models are old uploads and not all of the meshes are properly named/textured, i am in the process of going through and fixing them up) all of that said, i have not ripped every single model from the game, so if you have any requests for models/ref sheets that i haven't made yet, please let me know by DMing me either here on tumblr or on discord @/alaskanbullworm- you can also send me an ask about it. (if you want to request via discord, please send a friend request and then a message letting me know that you're there for a model request- otherwise i will probably assume it's spam and ignore it lol) unfortunately i am currently unable to rip the dlc costume models, as much as i wish i could. anyway, i hope these are helpful! :D UPDATE: i have found a way to use more color-accurate textures for the models- i probably won't remake all of the ref sheets but if you want to colorpick from the character models, i recommend doing it from the updated textures i am currently adding to the google folder!

[just-call-me-by-yn]

TORNADO WARNINGS - spencer reid

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader Content warning: angst, first person pov (most of the fic), swearing, y/n used twice, micro mention of typical CM violence Word count: 2.4k Summary: years pass, but the love you have for Spencer doesn’t disappear. Even though he left you a long time ago and you haven't talked since… until now. a/n: my first truly angsty fic so please be gentle with me. I was playing with this concept for a while and finally got the courage to sit down and finish it recently. hope you like it!! 🤍

I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and I came to the conclusion that love is like a flower, it dies over time. But what if the hypothetical flower would be fake? What if it was made out of plastic or some other durable material? That would be true love. One that’s everlasting.

“When the last flower dies, I’ll stop loving you” he said with a shy smile passing me a fake flower bouquet. “I– JJ said it would be more romantic to give you fake flowers and say that phrase instead of giving you roses or some other fresh flowers, so I just-”

“They’re perfect, but just so you know, I will have to throw them away if they’ll die.” I replied, my tone was playful in hopes that it would calm his thoughts, which I simply knew were running at sonic speed.

The flowers made out of plastic lose color with time, the vibrance of the petals washes away and the pigment of the leaves turns into a gray-ish tone of green. But the reminder of what used to be great and strong, colored and saturated is still there.

My hand reached for the blend of fake flowers, a grimace appeared on my face. It’s been years since I’ve even talked to him. The thought came to my mind of how I shouldn’t feel this hurt after over half a decade from the break-up. I am well aware that I shouldn’t keep the flowers, not even when they bring me comfort on lonely nights, smiles on awful days, just to make me uncontrollably sob later. I know it isn’t healthy. They were the sign of empty promises. Lovely words from a liar's mouth. But I still couldn’t push myself to take them off the shelf. Throwing them away would also mean that my part of the promise would be broken as well, and I just needed that safety net to keep up the peaceful state of mind. They didn’t die yet. Sure, maybe a couple of leaves have broken off and the petals started to tear, but the fake plant was still mostly intact.

My heart didn’t feel like it was going to be mending any time soon. I wasn’t obsessing over Spencer, but when I had a rough day at work, I used to put earbuds in and play any old voicemail recordings he had left for me. The most beloved one was of him telling me how proud he was of me. It was recorded after I announced that I got promoted.

“It’s not going to work out” he muttered under his breath as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I am not interested in seeing you anymore.”

My whole body froze. Did I hear him properly? Was this a nightmare or maybe a cruel joke?

“Excuse me?” the question came out of my mouth faster than I could process it.

“I am sorry, it’s not because of you, it’s me. I just can’t continue this relationship.” he looked everywhere but not at me, which felt like opening a wound that hasn't had any time to heal.

All I could do was choke out a weak, surprised laughter as I blinked away the tears.

“It’s so cliché. You can hear it in most romantic movies.” my voice sounded like it didn’t belong to me, oddly strange.

“Actually according to Merriam-Webster the phrase was originated by Zachary Spence in a newspaper as a sporting reference, though it morphed into a break-up line in 1991, but it was widely popularized in 1993 by– what?” he answered finally giving me his attention, confused as why I couldn’t stop looking at him, but I was taking every second to let his image sink into my memory.

“It’s just that- I’m going to miss your constant rambling, the oversharing” The corners of my mouth twitched as I tried my very best to smile, even if it hurt like hell.

And I do, still, after six years, going strong with a hollow chest. The moment I took off the ring of my finger felt like a punch in the gut, though a little piece of me knew that he wouldn’t leave me without a strong, fundamental reasoning.

Now, every time I read an article about god knows what I keep asking myself: does Spencer already know that? What I tell myself, is that he is a walking encyclopedia, of course he would know. But I shouldn't care, right?

My friends repeat “life goes on” like a mantra, and my parents say “it’ll get better”. But it’s not that simple.

Not when we were planning our future together and all of a sudden it gets thrown, like pawns off the checker of a chessboard. Game over. Start again. Good luck next time… with someone else.

Of course our relationship wasn’t perfect. Though constant worrying probably has reduced my life expectancy by a long run, I would gladly rather live less with him by my side than spend eternity without him.

Then a sudden knock at the door shredded all the thoughts that occupied my head, just to replace them with a question of who could it be? It was already getting dark out early and chilly rain was hitting the windows, quickly running down the glass panes, making a calming sound.

I took one… two… three careful steps out of the bedroom, another five to the front door. My fingers touched the cover of the peephole that I was instructed to set up by Reid when I was living in my former apartment. His story about a 'murderous peeping Tom' case (which was my name for it) got stuck in my mind, so this item was the last thing I took from my old place and the first thing I installed in the new home.

A quick stare through the viewer made me stumble backwards, turn around from the door just to cover my mouth with a shaky hand and place the other arm around my stomach. Suddenly I felt the heat run through my body, that couldn’t contrast more with the weather outside. I felt sick. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and before I could regret the decision I was about to make I unlocked and opened the door.

And there he stood in all his glory though his face was drained of emotions, he had dark circles under the eyes and a shadow of stubble, quite honestly he just looked like he had seen better days. But it was still Spencer.

“How did you–”

“Garcia.” I nodded at his response. “May I come in?”

As a silent invitation I just moved away from the door frame letting him pass me in the threshold. I could feel my hands begin to tremble, my nostrils started flaring and then there was a bitter taste caused by his presence, that somehow felt like venom in my mouth. All I was thinking of at that moment was that I couldn't hold it in any longer, and that the best outlet I could think of was the door, which I slammed as hard as my strength would have let me. A loud thud filled the apartment making Spencer flinch and his hand to fly to his chest almost instantly.

“How fucking dare you, huh?” I blew up.

It was weird how quickly my emotions could change. I didn’t know that I could be this sour, until the time I heard him speak, telling me that his friend from BAU basically stalked me down, for him to walk right into my safe haven, and make all the ghosts of memories disappear and for him to stand there, flesh and blood.

“You have to hear me out. Please." He was very hurt, I could even hear it in his voice as he pleaded, but it didn’t make sense to me. At least not at first, not until he explained it to me later.

“Spencer, you broke up with me, and that was years ago. What? Did you come by to get a cookie for breaking my heart? Like goddamn it.” I was clenching and unclenching my hands, open hand to fist, again and again.

“Let me explain,” he pinched the bridge of his nose, as if the words he was about to speak were slowly causing him a headache “It wanted to protect you, and I am sincerely sorry for hurting you. You have to understand that it was all for your safety. It wasn't my intention to cause you pain.”

“What are you even talking about?” my anger was slowly washing away to let the confusion take its turn.

“I had too. There was this one unsub, when we started getting in his way he decided to target the people who were close to us . I got worried when he-” he paced around the room and he looked like he was struggling with what words to use to make it all make sense.

“When he what?” I demanded an answer.

“We found his letter addressed to us and you were on the list. It was a hit list. Breaking it off with you was the only idea I had besides trying to have someone watch over you when I couldn’t. If I told you, you would have been trying to find another way to make it work. I know you, y/n. You would try to fight and risk your life. I couldn’t let you be so reckless”

“And what took you so long to tell me about it? It’s been years” I grabbed my shirt right around the collar and crinkled it in my first. My heart was burning in an unknown sensation, that was something I couldn’t describe. I wouldn't be able to do it even now.

“He was on a run for all those years. Just leaving breadcrumbs. We finally got him a few weeks ago,” His eyes were looking everywhere but mine and it felt like agony, though it didn’t cut deeper than betrayal. “y/n you have to know I did it all because I care about you, and it hurt me as well.”

“You know, I never… never truly found anyone, I couldn’t move on and it’s all because of you. It’s because you wrecked me Spencer. Ruin me for everyone else. Because a piece of me still loves you. A piece of me waited, but-” He reached with his hand to touch on my arm “don’t you dare touch me! You have no right to just walk back in and expect me to act, as if I wasn’t lonely and feeling unwanted for over half a decade”

I couldn’t hold back tears any longer, saying those words made me finally acknowledge the feelings I felt for so many years. And it made me ache, like someone ripped my soul out, stomped on it solely to put it back into my body again.

“We were engaged for God’s sake!” I tried to stay calm. I really did. However, yelling out my feelings made me think clearer. “And I tried to be a bigger person, tried to give you space. Forget about it, but it’s hard, when you told me it wouldn’t work out, out of the blue.”

“I tried to keep you alive y/n! And I am genuinely sorry. I am not begging you to forgive me because I know it feels like it was ages ago when we were together. I just want you to consider us and try to make it through this.”

“You sound like a crazy person right now,” I shook my head in disbelief, my mouth flew agape “lying to me, hiding the truth when omitting the fact that someone was planning to take my life, one way or another… I fear this is not something I can get over Spencer.”

From the perspective of time this wasn’t the greatest fear of mine. The thing I was frightened by the most, was that I would give in too easily. I knew I was able to forgive him, deep down I was sure I would bend if he asked me again.

“Okay,” he nodded, almost like he suddenly dissociated himself completely from being present. It felt like he mentally disappeared though his body still stood tall in front of me. He was no longer confident in what he believed in after my words, like all his will to fight for the relationship that we used to have, exited his being with a single lonely tear escaping his eye. He wiped it off immediately with the back of his hand. “I better get going then.”

"I think it would be better for the both of us, if you did." The emotions started to settle in my gut. I couldn't make him stay.

"Alright. goodnight." he said those words, probably hoping this wouldn't be our last goodbye. "Just think about it, okay?"

I nodded as I opened the door before him. When he left the tears started to flow down my cheeks again. This time they were like waterfalls of my broken heart and they were running wild. I just dropped to the floor. The loud sobs were echoing through my apartment as I curled myself into a fetal position.

"So…" you started not knowing what else to say "what do you think?"

The woman on the chair next to you carefully removed her glasses and set them on the table, along with a notepad.

"I think this story you just told me is a very unique and tragic love story," she said confidently "and a very unfortunate one at that"

You shifted uncomfortably on the couch you were sitting on for the past thirty minutes. You were nervously playing with your hands and chewing on your already puffy lips. Dumping the trauma was tiring you even more than your lack of sleep, due to the situation you were still digesting.

"Then, what should I do?" you ask looking up at the therapist, expecting a clear direction.

"I am not here to tell you what you should or shouldn't do…" she said in a calm voice and took a sip of whatever was in her white mug. "My only input here is supposed to be helping you understand your emotions, however, I can tell you to trust yourself and what you decide to do, the instincts usually don't lie"

my masterlist ♥

[sleepinthrumyalarms]

— power plays, pillow talk

pairing: victoria neuman x fem!reader

warnings:: smut, lesbian sex, size difference, strapon referred to as cock

summary:: a bottle of good wine, homemade dinner, a sweet little thing warming up her bed – what more could victoria possibly ask for after a long workday?

word count:: 1.5k

a/n: wow i'm rusty, haven't written smut in a good long while. starting off a bit vanilla with vicky. also she would 100% talk you thru it. i don't make the rules

never in her life had victoria neuman ever felt the need to compensate for something. a woman in power, in more ways than one, she never needed to climb through the ranks, simply gliding through them, a casualty or two on the way.

she had it all – a big car, a big house, a big desk at the Congress.

so you suppose it’s fitting; the big, girthy toy she has strapped around her hips under the material of her dress pants.

it’s huge, actually – got to be six inches at the very least, and that’s without taking into consideration the fact that you’ve never had any eye at all – of a dark, wine red color, the thick, thoughtfully lubed shaft glistening under the dim lights.

that one image of a hamster chomping down on a banana ten times his size pops up in your head.

your throat bobs with a soft gulp — oh god. you’re the hamster.

but victoria is nothing if not considerate. a soft silky pillow is lying under the small of your back, angling you properly for her, and the bedroom you share smells distinctly of something dark and woodsy, heady but not enough to overwhelm, the scented candles a welcome sensation that serves to relax you further.

when her hands grab ahold of your hips, thumbs pressing into the hipbones, you buck into her touch involuntarily. you’re not sure if it’s anxiety or arousal.

“no-no, that won’t do, pretty girl…” victoria chides softly, gives a playful little squeeze as a warning. “you promised you’d be good."

well, that’s true. you did.

you’re almost embarrassed – two glasses of cabernet sauvignon in and you’re already unable to think of anything but how much you want her. your skin tingles with anticipation, the gentle pressure of her hands grounding you as they slowly map their way up and down your body, caressing the undersides of your breasts, your shoulders, the plane of your belly. the warmth of the room wraps around you like a comforting embrace, the scent of the candles mingling with the subtle notes of the woman’s perfume – victoria’s hands work your body like dough, and that combined with the sight of the powerful politician standing between your thighs, all veneer and perfect composure, dark brown eyes trailing over your naked form like a feast is enough for your legs to part further. she doesn’t even have to ask.

“just like that, sweet thing. open up for me,” her palms rest on your thighs and she leans in to press a few gentle kisses to the side of your neck.

it’s intoxicating – her touch, her scent, how tender she’s with you, loving. you’re so aroused it’s starting to hurt.

“vicky…”

“i know, i know,” she murmurs. “need to get you ready for me first.”

she slides her ring finger through the warm petals of your pussy, humming at the wetness gathered there, and she can’t help but indulge herself. she leans down, face level with your cunt, and licks a thick stripe through the dripping warmth, teasing another involuntarily buck of your hips and a whimper from you.

you should’ve known she’d be too greedy to waste all that sweetness on her fake cock — she laps and slurps at you with gentle vigor, palm squeezing your hip to keep you from bucking into her mouth again. it’s a soft, affectionate kind of pleasure — victoria doesn’t rush, doesn’t push you too much too soon, deliberately avoiding your puffy clit to keep from any possible overstimulation.

you sigh softly, leaning your head back against the pillows, but before you can enjoy the heavenly sensation any further, she pulls away with one last flat lick, guiding your thigh to press against her hip.

the head of the toy pushes tantalizingly against your entrance, its smooth surface just barely parting your folds before she pulls back, sliding the silicone along your slit once more – the motion is slow and deliberate, the toy gliding easily through your wetness, teasing you with its presence. every so often victoria lets the tip dip inside, a fleeting, electrifying intrusion that leaves you aching for more, before withdrawing it again. the sensation sends shivers up your spine, your body instinctively arching towards the source of pleasure – but you know she’s doing it to get you nice and ready for her, as if the sloppy little courtesy licks weren’t enough.

"fuck, you're so wet," she whispers, her voice thick with satisfaction. "so eager. it's almost too easy."

she presses her hips more firmly this time, her cock breaching your entrance and slipping inside with a smooth, deliberate motion. the sensation is overwhelming, your body accommodating the intrusion with a mixture of relief and intense pleasure. she holds herself there for a moment, letting you feel the stretch and fullness.

god, it’s big – bigger than anything you’ve ever taken before. for a moment an alarming thought of not being able to fit the intimidating girth inside you shoots through your lust-clouded brain, but the smile on victoria’s painted lips tells you that she will make sure you do.

you tilt your head back with a shaky breath, and she chuckles, leaning in to nose at your earlobe, “good?”

biting your lip, you manage a nod in reply, hiding your face in her neck as you try to process the sensation.

victoria sets a slow, torturous pace, pulling out almost completely before sliding back in, her thighs kissing the backs of your legs. her hand shifts from your hip to your navel, gently sliding along your skin and pressing against your warm, sensitive stomach for purchase – the action so undeniably erotic it has a broken moan tearing from your mouth.

“oh?” victoria quirks a thick eyebrow, perfect white teeth peeking out to worry a plump lip between them. “does that feel good, sweet girl?”

her palm presses just the slightest bit firmer, enough to heighten the pleasure of her silicone cock pushing deep inside of your cunt deliciously as her fingers sprawl over the flesh of your belly — it flutters under her hand, muscles struggling to accommodate the enormous intrusion.

“d’you feel me here?” she asks, voice a silky purr, dripping with control and a hint of amusement as her hips drive the toy deeper into you, each thrust deliberate, strong, unyielding. “such a pretty tummy, baby… so, so perfect.”

you can’t even speak.

victoria leans down, her breath warm against your ear as she whispers, “i love how you open up for me… how you take every inch like you were made for this.”

the pressure in your stomach intensifies as she slows her movements, dragging each thrust out to an agonizing pace. her thick cock feels impossibly full inside you, stretching you in a way that teeters on the edge of pain and ecstasy.

"such a good girl, letting me stretch you, fill you up. gonna make it the only size you’ll ever take. the only that can ever satisfy you.”

she shifts her hips, the change in angle making you gasp as the toy hits that sweet spot inside you, the pleasure so intense it almost hurts. victoria's other hand that isn't busy trying to feel herself through the thin wall of flesh of your belly moves to prop herself next to your head, caging you in with her presence, and you reach to desperately hold onto her bicep, fingers digging into the dark blue of her power suit she has insisted on keeping draped over her shoulders.

“there you are, pretty girl. so close. so, so close, sweet thing. need you to cum for me."

victoria's pace quickens, hips snapping forward, and with a final, shuddering breath, you let go, the pleasure crashing over you in waves, overwhelming and all-consuming. she guides you through it, soft, reassuring whispers as she follows you into bliss, a guttural groan escaping her lips – for a moment the world is nothing but the two of you, tangled together in a haze of pleasure.

with the waves of white ecstasy beginning to ebb, she slows her thrusts to a gentle rhythm before withdrawing slowly, the loss of her presence inside you almost as intense as when she was buried deep. you whimper at the emptiness, your body still trembling with aftershocks, and her warm hands soothe the feeling away, a small, amused smile on her full lips, “thoughts?”

as if that isn't obvious.

you groan in response, wrap your arms around the woman’s shoulders to tug her down and press your lips against hers hungrily. then you pull away, breathless in satisfaction, and grin up at her, “fucking amazing. i wasn't even sure it’d be possible.”

victoria hums, her palm caressing your thigh thoughtfully, “in that case… you think you can take more?”

not one for being patient behind closed doors, she grasps your hips, coaxes you onto your stomach with firm hands.

“what am i saying. of course you can take more. cock-hungry little slut.”

the degrading words make you whimper into the silky pillow, and victoria coos, her tone the slightest bit patronizing, “ohh, yes you are, sweet thing. no use denying it.”

her fingers dig into your soft flesh, and suddenly all the warm tenderness is gone from her voice.

“up. don’t make me repeat myself.”

[vorfreudevortex]

Fake It 'Til We Make It

-`♡´- 11. Made It!

-`♡´- a chaptered smau series featuring: editorial assistant!ino x copy editor!fem!reader

warnings // 3.3k words/12 min. read - cussing, mentions of drinking alcohol, angst, your toxic ex tries to freak you out again, mentions of fighting and arguing, crying, confessions, uhhh lmk if i missed anything!!

author's notes // well damn. i guess that's all folks! thank you all SO much for reading my silly little self-indulgent series!!! might write an epilogue? or something spicy/18+? haven't decided yet, all i know is that i love my lover boy ino and he deserves the entire world.

stay tuned for my next smau/written series starring mafia!toji x sweet!fem!reader :) let me know if you want to be on the taglist for it!! i also have some yuta and noritoshi smau ideas floating around in my brain so please feel free to recommend tropes or anything else you want to see!! love you all and thank you so much for reading!!

10 // series masterlist // my masterlist // epilogue

Takuma cocks a brow when the large, tattooed man pulls out and sits in the linen-covered chair next to him. He figures right away that he wouldn’t ever be friends with the man as he takes in his appalling salmon-colored hair and the treacherously thick tattoos that cover his face and wrists.

The man doesn’t seem to be able to shop properly either, considering the pearly buttons on his white dress shirt seem to be precariously stretched to their fullest extent to keep the fabric together.

“I fucking hate weddings,” the man says with a grimace. Takuma casually shrugs and offers him a polite smile as takes another sip from the cup of beer in his hand.

“Meh, I kind of like ‘em,” Takuma responds politely.

The man scoffs. “What’s your name?”

“Ino. You?”

“Sukuna.”

“Nice to meet you, man,” Takuma smiles.

“How do you know the couple?”

“Oh, I don’t,” Takuma shakes his head. “I’m here with my girlfriend. She’s old friends with the bride.”

“Your girlfriend?” The corners of Sukuna’s lips twitch up. “Where is she? Maybe I know her.”

“Hah, probably. She’s been talking it up with old friends all night,” He quickly scans the room for your figure, but doesn’t spot you anywhere. So, he pulls out his phone and sends a quick text while he continues. “She’s probably still in the bathroom.”

“Maybe she’s hiding from me.”

Takuma glances at Sukuna with a wry smile, just to see him wearing his own smug grin. Okay… he’s weird, Takuma thinks. They offer each other a dry chuckle before Sukuna moves on. He lazily points to the white shoulder bag Takuma holds in his lap, the straps wrapped around one wrist.

“Cute,” He sneers. Dickhead, Takuma thinks. With a little bit of alcohol in his system, he has no problem giving the guy a little flak.

“I agree,” Takuma smiles sarcastically. “It matches her dress perfectly. Plus, I need to make sure she doesn’t lose anything while she dances.”

“Hm…” He responds. “Are you from this area?”

“Nah, I’ve lived around Tokyo for pretty much my whole life.” Takuma sends you another text before continuing the conversation. The last thing he’d ever want to be to a large man with face tattoos, is rude. “What about you?”

“I live in Tokyo, too. But I grew up around here.” Takuma just nods. “You know, I’m starting to think your little girlfriend left you here.”

“Nah, she would never,” Takuma laughs. Another text sent. “The line for the bathroom is long.”

“She seems like the type that would try to up and leave.”

Takuma gives the man a confused side eye, paired with an awkward smile of disbelief. What the fuck is his problem? “…You don’t even know her, man.”

Sukuna just laughs, loud and raspy, as he slaps a hand down on Takuma’s shoulder. ��Relax, kid. What’s your deal?”

Your boyfriend doesn’t return the laugh, but holds his uneasy smile as he glances back and forth from the hand on his shoulder and the pink-haired man. Sukuna quiets and his eyes lock on something beyond Takuma with a smug glimmer.

“Hey there, princess.”

Confused, Takuma turns his head to find you standing just a few feet away. You look beautiful as ever, but your shoulders are tense and your lips are parted in disbelief. Your eyes don’t fall on Takuma, much to his disappointment, but to the man next to him. The alcohol in your boyfriend’s system delays the realization that there is nothing but fear in your eyes.

You turn and rush away. Sukuna rises from his seat and follows, Takuma does the same. He grabs a handful of Sukuna’s dress shirt, which is promptly slapped away. “Get off me, boy,” he snarls.

“What did you do?” Takuma spits out, yanking on his arm to slow his hasty strides.

“That’s my girl, you little fucker,” Sukuna growls back. “Know your place and—”

“—Ryomen.”

It’s the groom, with angry eyes but a warm smile. He pulls Sukuna away. “—I thought you promised not to—”

Takuma doesn’t hear or care about the rest, he’s already hurrying after you. He sees you push your way into one of the bathrooms and quickly lock the door. Takuma jiggles the knob and gently knocks.

“Hey, pretty? You in there?”

No response. He hears the soft sound of your whimpers and sniffles and Takuma feels a foreign feeling of hurt course through his chest. As different thoughts fill his mind, he realizes that Sukuna had to be your ex boyfriend. The unsettling way he spoke, the way he reacted, the way you reacted? There was just no other explanation.

“Let me in, please? That guy is gone now.”

“I’m fine, Takuma,” your muffled voice responds. It’s shaky and small.

Takuma remembers the discussion in the groupchat from long ago, about the guy that barged into the office and dragged you out. He suddenly notices that you’ve never spoken about Sukuna to him before, and even diverted conversation away from the topic during the few times it was brought up. It must have been…awful, Takuma thinks.

“Please?” Takuma asks. It comes out as more of a desperate plea.

There’s movement behind the door before the lock quietly clicks open. Takuma immediately slips inside to see you sit back down on the toilet and bury your face in your hands. He locks the door behind him. The bathroom is quite small, with just enough room for a toilet, sink, and a small stool.

You’re humiliated, trying to hide your tears from Takuma as he sits on the stool and gently wraps a hand around your calf.

“Are you alright?” He delicately asks. “That was your ex, wasn’t it?”

You say nothing and avoid his gaze. After a quiet moment of attempting to wipe away your tears, you offer him a small nod.

“I’m so sorry…” Takuma nervously chews on his bottom lip. He looks up at you from the tiny stool, his fingers unconsciously kneading your leg. If you weren’t so distraught, you may have even giggled at the way his long legs awkwardly bent up to fit in this space. “If I’d known, I would have never kept talking to him.”

You let out a sniffling sigh as you shake your head. “Not your fault,” you croak out.

Takuma stands, sets your purse on the sink, and gets a handful of paper towels. He takes your hands from your face and starts to blot away your tears as he awkwardly bends over you.

“God, please don’t cry,” He says with worried eyes and a slight grimace. His face is just inches away from yours. “You’re making my heart break, pretty. I have no idea what to do when people cry.”

You’ve never been so embarrassed, never felt so vulnerable. At the end of the day, Takuma is just your coworker. Technically, your boss. Someone you see 5 days a week, 8 hours a day. Who reads your writing, gives you a stamp of approval, and sends it to Nanami. And here he is, wiping your tears in a tiny bathroom as you sit on a dirty toilet with a lump in your throat and hurt in your heart.

“I was certain he wouldn’t come,” You sniffle, still avoiding eye contact with Takuma. “He doesn’t come to these types of things.”

Takuma, on the other hand, is a bit distracted. He stares at your swollen lips and ruddy cheeks as he carefully wipes away each teardrop that spills from your eyes. The mascara smudged around your lashes makes his heart leap a little. His eyes travel down to your hands in your lap, which fiddle and fumble with the hem of your dress. The dress that he bought for you, the one that made him blush when you first tried it on. To Takuma, you’re just simply beautiful.

“You think he came because he knew you’d be here?”

You nod. His soft finger swipes a hair from your face. “I think he’s been chasing me down for a while.”

Takuma’s movements still. “Chasing you? What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” You shrug. “He just always seems to be everywhere I am. Even everywhere I’m not.”

“So he’s stalking you?”

With a small scoff, you shake your head. “I don’t know.”

Takuma sits back down on the stool, eyes filled with concern. “What do you mean?” He repeats. No response. He takes a hold of your hands with his, both of them now a warm bundle in your lap.

“Hey, I’m serious,” He says softly. “Is this Sukuna guy stalking you?”

You finally turn to look at him. The odd intimacy of direct eye contact feels suffocating for a moment. You’ve never seen Takuma so stressed as his big, brown eyes stare back at you. He doesn’t break away while he takes in the exhaustion and pain in your face.

The moment feels like a lifetime before you take out your phone and show him the texts you’ve received from your ex boyfriend throughout the past few months, before you finally blocked him. Takuma reads them in silence. There’s no movement or sound in the bathroom aside from his thumb scrolling and thick swallows as he reads the worst of it.

“This is insane…” He mutters with a disgusting face when he’s finished. “How long were you with this guy?”

“…Three? Four years?” You mumble, ashamed once more. “If you add everything between breakups together.”

“And you kept going back?”

“I…” A small, weird surge of irritation and helplessness courses through you. You pull your hands away from Takuma’s. “Do you really think I wanted to?”

“No!” Takuma’s eyes widen with guilt as he scrambles to find your hands again. “Shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

In a second of silence, he realizes your face is turned to the wall again, and he’s lost a piece of the trust he’d built with you. A pit forms in his stomach. “What I meant is…” Takuma clears his throat. “…You deserve better.”

“Yeah, sure,” You respond dryly. A tear rolls down your cheek.

“I’m serious,” He presses. “You’re just so kind and considerate. Don’t you think you deserve that, too?”

“But I’m really not,” You scoff. “I’d scream and yell at him. I’d call him names, too. I would just up and leave in the middle of the night when I knew he’d find me anyways.”

“Yeah, well, from what I’ve seen, the fucker deserved it.”

“So, you’re saying we both deserved what we got?”

“No.” Takuma stands, gently pulling you up with him. Warm hands delicately hold your arms. “You never deserved any of the shit that Sukuna guy did and said to you, or any guy for that matter.”

“Hey,” He quietly calls when you don’t respond. When you still don’t meet his eyes, he delicately takes a hold of your face in his hands. “That asshole deserved every argument and name you called him, because I know for a fact that he was the one that started everything and drove you to the edge.”

“Just because you fought back, it doesn’t mean you’re a shitty person,” He continues. “You’re intelligent, kind, thoughtful and… you’re so beautiful. You deserve someone that actually likes you, and loves you. Someone that shows it all the time, not just when they feel like it.”

More tears fall down your cheeks, which Takuma catches with his thumbs every time. “Aw, please don’t cry? Please…” He mumbles. He looks exasperated and… desperate? The guilt and exhaustion of the situation bubbles up in your stomach once again.

“Takuma, he’s said it himself,” Your breath catches in your throat as another sharp sob escapes. It feels like you’ll never escape Sukuna. You’ll never be able to rid your life of his hurtful words or his dangerous presence. You’re exhausted. Although he may not be the first thought in your mind anymore, his existence still persists in the back of your head. He almost haunts you. “There’s no one like that left for me. I-I’m… ruined.”

“W-what?” Takuma sputters. “That’s just—that’s not true!” Another raspy sob bubbles out from your throat, and you bury your face in his chest. With furrowed brows, he instantly wraps his arms around you. He pulls you in tight with one hand in your hair and the other on your back, desperate to comfort you. “You know… I’m here.”

You don’t respond. You can’t, not through the painful cries you’re sending into his sternum.

“I’m here,” Takuma swallows. He hopes to God you can’t feel his heart relentlessly pounding in his chest. “I like you.”

“But you don’t like me, Takuma,” you hiccup, voice muffled in his shirt. “You don’t love me.”

“I…I’m pretty sure I’m in the process of it.”

You snap your head up, both of you staring at each other with racing pulses and bewildered eyes.

You’d be utterly lying to yourself if you said you didn’t feel the same. How could you not? It became harder and harder throughout the past few months to not look at Takuma with something that bordered on genuine affection when he complimented you, cooked you dinner, or simply asked about your day.

You remember just a few days ago, after he cooked you your favorite meal and watched your favorite movie with you on his couch. Takuma never checked his phone once, even though it was a cringe rom-com that you had “forced” upon him. As the night wore on, you went from sitting beside him with his arm resting on the back of the couch, to having your slouched body pressed into his side as he scratched your scalp and played with your hair.

It was the first time you had ever let yourself get that intimate with Takuma. You were half-asleep by the time the movie ended and he woke you up. When you had raised your head, you were met with his face just inches from yours. You hadn’t said anything, only a long silent stare at the shape of his eyes and the curve of his lips.

In a sleepy daze, you leaned in. But as soon as Takuma started to do the same, something in your head clicked, and you backed away. You remember the heart-racing confusion as you quietly stared at each other once again. You remembered his disbelieving wide eyes, lit up by the glow of the TV. Your gut had tumbled and turned.

“I better head home,” You had whispered. He had put on a warm smile and nodded. When you got home later, you could only pretend you didn’t know what he was asking about. Laying in bed for the night, you could’ve sworn you felt those all-too-familiar butterflies in your stomach— The same ones you felt when Sukuna kissed you for the first time.

But each time that fleeting feeling of affection would float through your mind or heart, you’d dismiss it immediately, reminding yourself that it was just pretend. It was for the sake of a good article. A promotion. It was for the sake of saving face at this wedding. It was for the sake of a ongoing office prank.

It’s all fake.

“Takuma,” You blink. “Don’t—Don’t say that.”

“I’m not,” He replies with a wry smile. “…This is really not how I wanted this to happen.”

“Don’t say that,” You persist, your grip on his dress shirt tightening. “It doesn’t mean anything. We’ve just spent a lot of time together and we’re confused.”

“We?”

Your mouth snaps shut. Takuma just looks at you with hopeful eyes. You realize you’re both still holding each other, his large hands around your nape and lower back, but neither of you dare to separate. “No—I—okay,” You sputter. “Yes, we. We are confused.”

“I’m not confused, though,” Deep brown eyes dart around your face as he gnaws nervously on his lip. “I’m certain that I’m not. Are you?”

A long, stretching silence follows his question. Every interaction, every word and memory you’ve shared with Takuma spins through your mind. You remember all the innocent touches, accidental or not, that sent shivers up your spine or a heat across your cheeks.

You have no idea that Takuma is remembering, too. All the times he hyped himself up before sending a flirty text, the giddiness he felt dropping you off after a date, the fluttering feeling in his heart when you flashed him a genuine smile, the raging jealousy that ran through his blood when he met that random dickhead date of yours— Takuma remembers everything.

“I just… want you to be happy,” He hesitantly continues with a sheepish smile. “…Preferably with me—”

“—No.”

Oh.

Takuma’s face falls the smallest bit before he recovers himself. “That’s alright,” He begins to remove his hand from your waist. “I completely underst—”

“—No! I mean I’m not confused.”

“You’re not?” His face is full of uncertainty.

It makes you wants to slap yourself for making him feel this way. You’ve felt it boiling in your bones for weeks now. You wanted to tell him, or at least accept it, that you wanted him. You wanted Takuma to look at you, to sit next to you during meetings, to text you even if it meant you would be too scared to flirt back. You wanted him to keep remembering your coffee orders, be your partner on work assignments, to ask you to proofread his articles.

You wanted him to touch you, but not like that. You wanted the innocent ways like a protective hand on your back, an arm around your shoulders during a movie, or how he’d fix your hair when something was off. God, you even want him to kiss you. Just once, to know what it’s like. You’ve thought about it over and over, but it’s only in this moment right now where you’re allowing these amassing feelings to finally settle.

“I’m not,” You whisper. “I’ve just been denying it. Attempting to, at least.”

“Yeah… I gave up on that like two months ago,” Takuma cracks a smile.

“2 months ago?” Your heart skips a beat. It never really occurred to you that he was having the same thoughts. “Were you ever going to tell me?”

“Eventually. Were you?”

“Eventually,” You can’t help but smile back. “…I knew all of this was a bad idea.”

“But you did it anyways,” He swipes away a stray tear that remained on your splotchy cheek as you both let out nervous giggles.

“…What do we do now?” You whisper.

“I always imagined that after months of pathetically yearning,” He starts playfully, “I’d finally get the courage to confess, you’d feel the same and be so smitten and overcome with emotion that you’d jump into my arms. I would finally kiss the fuck out of you, then we would ride off into the sunset in a cool car or something, leaving Nanami and Yuji to fend for themselves at work.”

“Then… what are you waiting for?” You blurt with a laugh. Takuma’s eyes widen.

“W-what do you mean?”

“Oh, God,” You mutter, shaking your head with a smile. You look up at his sweet, brown eyes, and sigh in relief. “I’m tired of denying it. Please, just kiss me, Takuma.”

With a fiery blush on his cheeks, Takuma pulls your body in flush with his and lifts your jaw with a gentle hand. The warmth of his hand on the small of your back and his breathe against your lips leaves you reeling in anticipation. You wrap an arm tightly around his neck as the other still grips his shirt. The tip of his nose nudges against yours and you both smile.

“Pretty girl,” The tip of his nose nudges yours, you both smile. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for you to say that.”

10 // series masterlist // my masterlist // epilogue

notes & fun facts! //

i'm kind depressed that this is over but i hope you all enjoyed the fluff and slow burn!!

i wanted to add more drama with sukuna but i ultimately decided against it because y'all have been through enough 😭

lowkey how do i write x reader without saying "you" all the time LMAO i fucking struggle everytime

if i wrote an epilogue it would delve more into their future at jj&k, they'd live together, and just be super fluffy and happy. idk if that's something people would care about tho but lmk and i'd be happy to write something out hehehe

thank you all again for reading :') i love you so much

taglist // @jayathelostdragon @vesserz @loveyislost @grierpilots @shokosbunny @darkstudentsaladbakery @rieamena @yourhornysister @emlient @shutuppeter @90s-belladonna @sttaejoon-blog @fuckisthatahotghost @aldebrana

banner from pinterest (help me credit the artist!) // divider by @/kodaswrld <3

© vorfreudevortex // all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, or repost my work.

[dduane]

Process for the new DEEP WIZARDRY International Edition cover

(rolls up sleeves) Right. Writing work (and recurring health issues) have repeatedly pushed these pieces of work to one side for the last year and a half. Time to take a brief break from ongoing work in other universes to rectify that.

Here's the template that I'm building on: the international edition cover for So You Want To Be A Wizard. (Available only outside North America, if you're wondering what makes it international. These paperbacks use the New Millennium Edition texts—except for the international edition of Games Wizards Play [when it comes out later this year], which was written to fit into the NME timeline to begin with, and will go into its international editions with that text.)

The cover concept's straightforward. Relatively dark, desaturated backgrounds: one glowy (or somewhat glowy) thing in the foreground, in a color that pops, or in lighting that makes it stand out.

For Deep Wizardry, things get slightly complicated by the fact that so much business happens underwater. But there are some things we can work with there. A scene in which two pivotal characters square off seems like a fair bet.

So: background first. Underwater lighting...

The sea floor: sand.

Sunlight from above the water.

But naturally that's not how the bottom would look, because there are ripples on the surface...

And naturally the sea bottom isn't going to be featureless, so we need some weeds and rocks.

The distribution's not ideal on these, but that comes under "fine tuning." That can happen over the weekend.

Now for the main attractions. Nita...

...and Ed. (ETA: There are some scale issues here. Properly speaking, Ed'rashtekaresket is significantly bigger, in comparison with Nita, than he's being framed in this shot. But Nita had to be big enough to actually show on the cover... So some liberties inevitably get taken.)

Now, while this is all promising enough so far, there's a bit of a problem. Nita's not terribly visible at this point. So, time to engage in some visual jiggerypokery that will both help with that problem and do something to hint at the connection between these two.

IIRC, Nita was wearing a wizardly forcefield in this scene to provide her with air and other necessities. So let's exploit that.

In the render, I can apply to her figure what in Daz Studio parlance is called a "geoshell": a kind of skintight digital overskin to which special effects can be applied: such as light emission. (And Nita's hair will get one too.) Since everything else in the scene is cool-colored, this light is going to need to be warmer, in (at the very least) a golden range. (Or rosy. May be playing with that for a bit.)

...But obviously we can't leave her looking like that. So what I get to do now is lose the rest of the scene and render Nita separately, in the same position but with different, less blued-out lighting...

...then add her figure back into the scene, over the geoshelled version (which can be clone-brushed out later).

...So when we slot that imagery into the paperback cover template, after some tweaking, this is what we get.

...Still some things to correct or refine here. (Such as the main body of back cover text, as I haven't written the new copy yet. And the quotes may want tweaking: the NYTimes review [which the WaPo picked up] had some lines that might work better.) Colors, composition, etc etc, can all use some final touches. But I think we're most of the way there.

With any kind of luck, this edition will be available online in paperback and ebook formats for the non-North American audience this time next week. (I'm still considering whether I want to offer hardcovers on these as well.)

(sigh) Now I want some tea. And then, tomorrow maybe, on to the int'l edition of High Wizardry...

ETA 2: off @softness-and-shattering's question:

If I may ask, is it not your publishers job to do this work? Is this a continuation of the thing where authors now seem to be expected to do their own marketing too, or are you doing the new millenium editions 'on your own' or similar?

I'm doing them on my own. While there are numerous foreign-language editions of the original YW books, the only publisher to use the NME texts so far (for books 1-3) has been Lumen éditions in France, and I'm not clear whether those editions are still in print.

Whatever their status, that still leaves me with a lot of countries where I can publish. And if that job's going to get done—lacking other publishers' interest, which my agents would handle—It falls to me to take the work forward. Such are the wonders of our age that I no longer have to wait for a publisher to turn up. And should something suddenly happen for publishers to get interested (like a TV series or whatever) then i can easily withdraw my own editions and let my agents do deals with them.

Meanwhile, why (as we say) leave money on the table? There are other English-speaking countries on the planet where the YW books can be marketed (and more countries still where—when there's cash to spare to hire the necessary creative talent—translations might not do too badly). So I might as well get on with it! I've got groceries to buy and bills to pay like everybody else... :)

(And just pausing here to point at the page pinned to the top of my feed. If you want to help with those groceries, there's a good place to start: the ebook bundles are still at their pre-holiday sale prices! ...Unless you're in the UK. [I'm so sorry about Brexit, folks, but there's nothing I can do about that...])

[canine-witch]

What Mystery Will Be Revealed To You?

As a collective, we may have all had some strange things happen, last year and this year. I recieved word that many are feeling like something is hidden from them, waiting to be revealed. I hope to bring clarity to you all today. Drink some water, pick a pile, and feel free to reject what does not resonate.

☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚

☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚

Group One, The Woman

Someone has been very greedy to you, seeker. You may have suffered a loss in a friend group or a social opportunity, that you blame yourself for. The catalyst may have been a large fight, and cheese or spiders may be relevant. In reality, I see a large dragon, resting upon towering piles of pearls. Someone is hoarding either you, or a great opportunity. They have been jealous and attention seeking, and dislike you having the group's attention. I also see a large feast, which rats have started eating. But, the rats are already full, and they cannot eat enough of the feast, to have it matter. You need to turn back to creativity, spend some time alone, and ask your guides for support. Feel free to walk away, you are promised more than you ever asked for, and maybe even a public apology! Blessed be to you!

Group Two, The Cat

You have faced a major setback, and have felt stuck in many areas of your life. Symbols of the moon and skulls may be present. You think that this is the power of a hex, curse, or evil eye, but in reality you have hidden personal power, that you have accidentally turned against yourself. I see a horse, running in circles under the night sky. The horse is powerful and moving quickly, but with no true direction. You need to use your energy now. You have been planning something, the time is now to bring it to fruition. You have only been hindering yourself. Get up, and believe in yourself. Many blessings to you, you will go far in life.

Group Three, The Deer

You have been confused about why you are so tired, but cannot sleep at night. You feel restless and anxious, and you are here seeking the answers why. You haven't been expressing your emotions properly. I am feeling my throat becoming tight, you need to speak your truth. I see a large swamp with many frogs, but one frog refuses to sing with the rest. You may be feeling isolated, making you scared to express yourself. The color green and the images of the planet Saturn or it's energy may be present. Tobacco smells or cigarettes may also be relevant. While your people may not be accepting, your guides and the universe is. You don't have to tell anyone if you feel unsafe or uncomfortable, but in private live your truth. Things will get easier, you will leave the past and this toxic group behind. Express yourself fully, and your exhaustion will dissipate. Blessed be, saying prayers for you. Be safe.

Group Four, The Crows

You have experienced much pain, and you have escaped that situation. But, you find yourself beginning to return to that dark place and it scares you. You are either not hearing, or refusing to listen, to kindness. I see a vision of a fox caught in a trap. There are friendly humans around trying to help, but the fox is biting and snarling at them ferociously, because a human put them in that trap. The only way to escape, is to accept help and kindness. Roses with thorns, racing rivers, and foggy woods may be relevant symbols. You may have heard or seen owls everywhere. It is a symbol of your intelligence and wisdom. You are smarter, wiser, and stronger now. You are ferocious, and able to find double crossers easily. There is nothing to fear, you know if something or someone is good. Smile, accept help, and let go of your pride. Be happy blessed one, your pain is over.

☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ⁺˚*･༓☾☆.｡.:*ₓ˚. ୭ ˚

Thank you for engaging and hearing me seeker. I pray for your success in all things, and that you remain on a beautiful path.

As Above So Below, As I Say, So Mote It Be. Go in Peace.