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cheri-translates · 3 years

Text

[CN] Victor’s Business Exhibition Date

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 企展之约, which has not been released in EN 🍒

[ This date was released on 16 July 2021 ]

After a meal on this weekend afternoon, I’m nestled on the sofa, watching a new episode of an anime.

MC: Hahahaha!

Watching the comical antics of the main character on-screen, I can’t help but laugh out loud.

“Whoosh--”

Hearing the rustling of papers from behind, I subconsciously shut my mouth, my line of sight flitting past the sofa and landing on Victor.

He’s sitting at the dining table, a look of concentration on his face while he reads a report. The small dining table is full of documents.

I had initially planned to watch movies with Victor at my place today. I didn’t expect him to be so bogged down with work lately, and unable to relax over the weekend.

MC: Victor, am I disturbing you? Why don’t you use the study room or my bedroom instead?

Without lifting his head, he props up the spectacles on the bridge of his nose.

Victor: Who was the one who wanted to “stick” together with me over the weekend?

MC: ...that’s true, but you’re focusing on work now.

He has no intention of continuing the conversation. Rubbing my nose guiltily, I head into the kitchen quietly. After cutting some fruits, I bring them over to the dining table.

MC: In that case, I’ll apologise to CEO Victor~

Sticking a toothpick into an apple slice, I bring it to him. He tilts his head up slightly, taking a bite from the apple in my hand.

From my peripheral vision, I spot an invitation card with the words “Elementary and Middle School Students” on it. Curious, I take a closer look.

MC: “Corporate Culture Exhibition for Elementary and Middle School Students”? Is LFG participating in the Corporate Culture Exhibition?

Victor: We received the invitation and haven’t decided if we’re participating.

MC: I see... I’ve never heard of this exhibition.

Victor: The government organised it this year.

Victor: The officials said that it’s meant to introduce elementary and middle school students to outstanding occupations and various career paths to help them establish their aspirations.

MC: This exhibition seems pretty meaningful. It’s beneficial to LFG’s business image too.

MC: Come to think of it, I wonder if little kids have an understanding of LFG, and what kind of impression they have of LFG?

MC: Oh yes! There was a news report on elementary and middle schoolers going on company tours. Does LFG want to organise a similar activity?

Ideas come one after another in my mind. I rattle on about my opinions, but Victor doesn’t express anything.

When I start making an inventory of the company tour for students, the pen in his hand pauses, and he lifts his eyes slowly.

Victor: I can consider the exhibition, but not the company tour.

MC: Why not?

His deep eyes sweep over the anime on the television screen before landing on me.

Victor: There’s already one very noisy kid in LFG.

In the end, Victor accepts the invitation to the Corporate Culture Exhibition. The exhibition commences as scheduled.

Out of interest, I offer my services to Victor. I become a volunteer responsible for decorations at the venue.

Seeing the detailed and vivid posters introducing various occupations in the exhibition hall, the LFG employees next to me are slightly awed.

LFG Employee A: It’s really nice that we have the chance to understand different occupations. When I was young, I thought there were only astronauts and scientists in the world.

LFG Employee B: Even if you only knew of those careers when you were young and decided on an aspiration, it might not become reality when you grow up. I wanted to be a dancer, but I’m doing something completely unrelated to the arts now.

LFG Employee A: That’s true. If it weren’t for the excellent pay in LFG, I’d probably be at my old home opening a second-hand bookshop and retiring early. Oh yes, MC, what did you want to do when you were young?

Getting pointed out suddenly while engrossed in their discussion causes me to be stunned momentarily.

MC: When I was young...

I blink, recalling somewhat faraway memories. Before I can ponder deeply, my phone rings - it’s a call from Victor.

Victor: Come to the café near the entrance of the exhibition hall.

MC: Now? What for?

Victor: ...what else can you do in a café? Play golf, amend proposals, go horse riding, drink coffee - which one do you think is the most suitable?

MC: ...to be honest, I can’t decide between the two options of “amend proposals” and “drink coffee”.

Victor: I ordered a custard cake. If you don’t come over, I’ll take it that you’re not interested.

MC: I’ll be there immediately!

After notifying those LFG employees, I turn around and head towards the café.

MC: Is this really okay? The others are still busy.

Victor: When did you have such a high sense of awareness? Who was the person who painstakingly learnt “Slacking Hacks” on the internet a few days ago?

MC: I was reading that for fun... I wasn’t planning to put it into practice.

Lifting my phone as I squeeze into the packed café, I notice that most of the people here are parents who are preparing to accompany their kids to the exhibition.

Victor: There’s still an hour till the exhibition begins. I’ve already told Goldman to inform everyone to take a break. In short, there’s no need to feel guilty, because...

Taking two steps into the café, I spot Victor at a glance as he sits at a table near the window calmly.

Seeing that I’m walking towards him, he puts down his phone gently, lifting his head to meet my eyes.

Victor: Aside from you, there’s another person who’s “slacking”.

Taken aback for a moment, I quickly react to the meaning in his words. My brows arch upwards as I take a seat.

MC: I didn’t expect to ever “slack” together with CEO Victor.

Elated, I pick up a fork and try a bite of the dessert in front of me. The custard melts in my mouth instantly, and it’s sweet and smooth.

MC: Delicious! As expected of CEO Victor’s pick~

Victor: Even delicious food can’t stop you from being talkative.

Right after saying this, he seems to stare at me fixedly, his expression slightly strange.

Just as I’m about to ask why he’s looking at me that way, he lifts up his coffee, his lowered eyelashes covering the smile in his eyes.

...am I overthinking things? Why do I feel as if he’s making a joke out of me?

Feeling puzzled, I notice a pen and a post-it booklet at the edge of the table.

MC: This is...?

A staff who is passing by takes a step forward, smiling as he explains.

Staff: This is a small event by our shop. You can write your hopes or suggestions for the children, then hang it on the “Hope Tree” near the door of the shop.

Struck with an idea, I pick up the pen and a post-it note.

MC: Victor, shall we write a few suggestions for the children too?

I tear a post-it note and give it to him. After staring at me in silence for a while, he suddenly reaches out his hand.

Victor: Give me one more.

MC: ?

MC: Does CEO Victor want to write a mini essay?

Ignoring my joke, he writes a sentence on each of the two post-it notes. He hands one to the staff, and stuffs the other one to me.

Bewildered, I sweep a glance at the post-it note given to the staff. The words “You only have one life” are written on it.

Lowering my head, I stare at the post-it note in my own hand. In an instant, I realise why he displayed such a strange smile earlier. There’s a short sentence written on the post-it note:

“Dummy, there’s custard on your cheek.”

??: Hello, could I trouble the two of you to help me with something?

My face reddens. After wiping the custard off my cheek with a tissue, I hear an unfamiliar female voice next to me.

Turning towards the sound, I see a lady standing beside me with two small boys.

Woman: I need to use the washroom, but bringing two boys with me isn’t really convenient. Could I trouble the both of you to take care of them for a while?

I ask for Victor’s opinion with my gaze, and he responds with a slight nod. Understanding this, I nod at the mother.

MC: Of course we can.

While thanking us, she gets the two children to sit at both ends of the table before hurrying off.

The table now comprises of the four of us - two adults and two children. The air gets filled with an inexplicable, thick awkwardness.

Victor looks at me. I look at the kids. The kids look at Victor... Clearing my throat, I decide to break this strange atmosphere.

MC: Kids, how old are the both of you?

Kid A: Mommy said that we can’t give personal information to strangers!

MC: ...

I didn’t expect to be given the cold shoulder the moment I opened my mouth. I release an embarrassed laugh.

MC: Personal information... You can use such advanced terms. You’re so smart haha.

A soft and low chuckle drifts to my ears. I glance at Victor as he picks up his coffee with a blank expression, staying uninvolved in the matter.

The other boy suddenly widens his eyes and leans towards me, pointing at my volunteer name tag and reading it aloud.

Kid B: L! F! G! Do you two work in LFG?

MC: Well...

I ponder over this. LFG is the investor of my company, and Victor is the CEO of LFG. So...

MC: I guess so.

Kid B: In that case, what are the two of you doing here? Did you sneak away?

MC: ...

Although these are unintentional words from a child, I avert my eyes guiltily. At this point, the kid who behaves like an adult speaks loudly.

Kid A: That’s impossible! Mommy said that everyone who works at LFG are really incredible people! They won’t sneak away!

Victor: Cough...

Victor pauses his sampling of the coffee. As though he choked on something, he clears his throat.

Kid B: Really?

The kid blinks his eyes as he waits for our response.

Victor’s expression is a little unnatural. He picks up a newspaper from a rack near the window, immersing himself in it.

Seeing him like this, he probably recalled the earlier conversation we had on “slacking” as well.

It’s rare to see Victor being choked up by someone. A little demon with horns suddenly appears in my heart.

I can’t help but laugh inwardly while turning to the kids.

MC: You’re correct. The employees from LFG never sneak away. We were talking about work-

MC: Right, Vic?

[Note] In CN, MC calls Victor “小李” (“xiao li”, which translates directly to Little Li).

Saying this, I wink at the person opposite me.

Victor arches his brows, astonishment in his eyes. Without waiting for him to speak, I immediately do a “stop” gesture with my hands.

MC: The previous proposal for the show is too conservative. There aren’t any highlights, and it isn’t clear who the target audience is. It might be a waste to show it during prime time.

Adjusting my posture, I clasp my fingers on the table, mimicking VIctor’s tone and expression.

MC: When will you be submitting the new proposal? Tomorrow is the deadline.

Kid A and B: Wow...

Awed gasps from the kids drift to my ears. I straighten up with pride, tilting my chin towards Victor.

He stares at me with a calm gaze, his eyes gradually illuminated with an unreadable, dense light.

He lowers the newspaper slightly, blowing the coffee in his hand gently and unhurriedly.

Victor: Are you sure these are the only problems, Miss CEO?

Victor: I've also “reflected” much on that proposal, and there are some problems I haven’t had the chance to tell you about.

Victor: Since you brought it up, I have no choice but to do a “self-reflection” here.

Victor’s tone is composed, and there isn’t a ripple in his expression. As compared to my pretentious posture, he’s laid-back and natural.

Victor: The theme of the show is too general and lacks a segment which stirs the audience.

Victor: The structure also has the shadow of previous shows. A change in form but not substance - it’s a little unoriginal.

Victor: A scandal broke out yesterday involving one of the guests for the show. A replacement guest has not been decided upon.

Victor: Also...

MC: Stop! I... I get it!

He leans against the back of the chair, a teasing glint in the depths of his eyes.

Victor: When will you be submitting the new proposal? Tomorrow is the deadline.

MC Tonight, tonight! I’ll definitely submit it tonight!

I reply instantly, my voice carrying with it some alarm. The corners of his lips hook upwards, and he retracts his “overbearing” aura.

Victor: I’ll wait and see.

I heave a sigh of relief, then feel a dryness in my mouth. Lowering my head to take a sip of coffee, I see the disappointed gazes of the two kids.

My cheeks flush. Just as I’m about to say something to salvage some pride, their mother returns, thanking us while taking them away.

I glare at Victor indignantly. He chuckles softly, then clasps his fingers together on the table just like I did earlier.

Victor: I look forward to your next “challenge”.

After the exhibition ends, Victor and I leave work early.

The weather is really nice today. We pick a restaurant nearby, planning to head there on foot.

Dusk hangs low, and a misty pink evening mist smudges the sky.

Perhaps due to how smoothly the exhibition went, little emotions surface in my heart.

Beneath this beautiful sky, how many young aspirations and lives took flight earlier?

Victor: Why are you just standing there in a silly daze? Aren’t you hungry?

Retracting my thoughts, I see that Victor has stopped in front of me, his body turned to the side as he looks at me.

I hurriedly catch up to him, pulling on his arm.

MC: Victor, why did you write “You only have one life” on the post-it note today?

Victor: It’s true that you only have one life. Even an elementary student knows this principle.

MC: ...that’s not what I meant. I’m asking about what’s implied in it. For instance, are you asking the kids to seize the day and work their hardest?

His gaze lands on me. Seeing how serious I look, he slows down his pace slightly.

Victor: If you were to meet your childhood self, would you tell her to work her hardest?

MC: Mm... it’s difficult to say. I might tell her what to do in order for the current me to be even happier?

Victor: And that the reason why you can’t use an overly objective and rational principle to teach others.

Victor: It’s a desirable trait to work their hardest so that there won't be any excuses to stop in their footsteps.

Victor: But this doesn’t mean that everyone must have the goal of working their hardest.

Victor: After all, every person expects different things from themselves.

Victor: Not everyone wants to stand at the peak.

Victor: As compared to looking down from a mountaintop, there are some people who wish to happily and simply appreciate the scenery along the way.

Victor: This might sound simple, but being an ordinary person isn’t easy.

Victor: “You only have one life” - this phrase has many meanings in different contexts.

I’m stunned for a moment. I initially thought that Victor’s words were meant to be a motivational quote, and didn’t expect for him to have such thoughts.

Even when he’s faced with young children, he doesn’t wish to give a fixed answer on the basis that he’s a mature adult.

My lips curl upwards, and I can’t help but stick a little closer to him.

MC: You’re right. After all, aside from people who stand at the peak, there are even more ordinary people.

MC: Ordinary people have one life too. They need to cherish it properly, and do what they want to do.

MC: CEO Victor, I’ve learnt something from you!

Clasping my hands together, I bow in mock seriousness. An almost indiscernible smile lifts the corners of his lips.

MC: Come to think of it, I had so many aspirations when I was young. Lawyer, teacher, police officer, judge... I didn’t expect to become a producer in the end. Perhaps in a parallel universe, there’s a me who became a lawyer, teacher or judge!

The scene from the café flashes across my mind, and I burst into laughter.

MC: I might even be a CEO! What do you think?

After I say this, Victor turns his head and gives me an amused glance.

Victor: I think you do behave like a CEO.

MC: It’s because I’ve been influenced after spending such a long time by your side~ Returning to the topic - what was your aspiration when you were young? To become a powerful business tycoon?

Victor: ...have you ever heard of a child having such a pragmatic dream?

MC: In that case, tell me about it?

He doesn’t respond, and simply keeps his eyes faced front. No matter how much I probe, he doesn’t speak.

The sweet fragrance of desserts wafts into my nose. Following the scent and turning to the bakery near the roadside, I’m struck with an idea.

Since I can’t crack this difficult question in a straightforward manner, I decide to adopt the process of elimination.

MC: A baker?

Victor: ...

A signboard with the words “Watchmaker Shop” enters my vision, and I immediately look at him.

MC: A watchmaker?

MC: The boss of a lottery shop?

MC: ...director of a zoo?

Throughout the journey, I rack my brain and ask him about all sorts of occupations. However, it’s clear that none of them are correct.

Finally, we stop in front of a crosswalk, waiting for the red light.

Looks like I won’t be able to get any answers from him today. Disappointed, I let go of Victor’s arm, releasing a soft “hmph”.

MC: Aren’t you curious if there was a choice and you weren’t the CEO of LFG, and if I weren’t a producer...

MC: What would our identities be? Would we meet? And what kind of a relationship would we have?

The red man at the other end of the road suddenly turns green, signalling for us to move forward.

My hand, which had drooped to the side, is lifted up gently by someone. His broad palm conveys a comforting temperature.

Victor: There’s nothing to be curious about.

The crowd flows past in an endless stream on the crosswalk. Their footsteps are hurried, and the tips of their feet point in different directions.

I look at the person beside me. His gaze is resolute as he holds my hand, taking large strides towards the restless crowd.

He seems to sense my gaze. Lowering his head slightly, the light in his eyes is deep and scorching.

Victor: The life that I want to choose most is already in my hand.

[ MOMENTS ]

Victor's Post: Turns out someone could still go to work normally after staying up to watch anime last night.

MC: Could we cancel tonight’s reservation at the restaurant? I really want to go straight home to sleep...

Victor: Eating is a necessity. The location will be changed to your home.

Victor's Post: Turns out someone could still go to work normally after staying up to watch anime last night.

MC: As long as I’m hardworking enough, nothing’s impossible!

Victor: Working hard to make yourself even more stupid?

Victor's Post: Turns out someone could still go to work normally after staying up to watch anime last night.

MC: I solemnly vow not to do such things again.

Victor: This vow better count before you start on the next anime.

🍰 Call: here

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc victor #hNNGHGH MY HEART

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yanderart · 4 years

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Once you found Shouto on the Anti-Purge forums, it felt so wonderful to be understood. So comforting to finally have someone you could rely on...

So, when you got a letter notifying you of your selection for the Annual Purge later on, of course you went to seek his help.

Should’ve known better than to trust strangers online, though.

My fic/portrait convo for the Yandere Purge Collab, from the Lovesick Discord. And please check the rest of the m. list for other amazing works set in the same AU!

Under the cut is the actual fic (Todoroki x Reader, nsfw, dark themes, 10k), as well as the respective TWs. Hope y'all enjoy 🥀

-------

Tws: Usual yandere ones (stalking, manipulation, delusion). Dub-con/Non-con. Non-consensual Drug Use, aka Aphrodisiacs. Death threats and sexism (from randoms on the forum, not Todo).

-------

You couldn’t think straight —hadn’t been able to since waking up again. All you could recognize amidst the fog currently obscuring your thoughts was the longing, prolonged, and tangible in its hold over your being.

You felt hot all over, the flames licking at your skin burning brightly as you squirmed from your place, eagerly attempting to get closer to the cold reprieve emanating from the man that held you.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Y/N." One of his hands was steering you on his lap, the other one gently massaging your shoulders in a comforting motion. “I can only help you if you do."

If your judgment had not been overcast by the desire pushing away your self-awareness, then perhaps you could’ve heard the faint hint of amusement in his voice. Perhaps you would’ve thought to look up and finally encounter the content shine of his heterochromatic eyes.

“I feel…" speaking was laborious, your tongue impossibly weighty and your mind swirling with thoughts that escaped any semblance of coherence. “I feel hot all over. It hurts.”

The hand positioned around your waist went to search for one of your clenched ones, easily engulfing it in his grip as he nudged the side of your face with his chin rather tenderly. A gentle encouragement for you to stay attentive, anchoring you to the moment despite your dazed mindset.

“Show me then,” his low timbre tickled your skin, sending another wave of excruciating heat to wreak havoc inside your body, “Let me know where it hurts.”

With a stuttering sigh, you proceeded to press both of your hands to your lower stomach, gulping audibly before bringing them further down. Dancing just short of your underwear while your eyelids fluttered shut.

You knew your actions were out of character deep down. Even recognized the shadow of wrongness that distorted the current scene. You weren't supposed to do such things, weren't supposed to feel like that…

But the reality was that you were so excruciatingly warm by that point, and his palm felt so deliciously cold.

When you heard the dreadful siren going off in the distance, the instantly recognizable sound of the Purge starting at last, you were already too far gone to think of anything else but the fingers brushing against the thin cotton of your panties, so close to the evidence of your need soaking through them.

Your parents had told you not to trust strangers online once upon a time. You should’ve really taken their advice more to heart.

。。。。。

But first, perhaps a little tracing of your steps is in order —some necessary context to fully understand the extension of your plight.

You see, earlier that day you had woken up full of a peculiar mix of drive and determination. It was indeed Purge Day, the single day of the year you had grown to fear the most ever since childhood, and yet for once you found yourself oddly relaxed, filled to the brim with resolve instead of your usual nerves.

Which was already an unexpected turn of events, considering you had just gotten a letter notifying you of your selection as one of the accursed Darlings of the Night.

A gentle reminder that, if caught, your life would stop belonging to yourself for an entire dreadful year.

Because a Yandere had their sight on you now, or so the notice had informed you in impeccable typography. Anxious fingertips memorized the slight raise of inked words, inspecting every single detail the letter carried.

You had imagined a monster ready to pounce just outside your door then, fitting enough to be the carrier of your bad news. A preternaturally grotesque being, built from all the Yandere themed horror stories you had heard throughout the years.

And yet there you were, feeling safer in that instant than you had in years; Because this time you had a plan. He made sure to give you one you could easily follow.

Just like he later made sure to welcome you in with a kind smile and awfully persistent hospitality.

"Would you like a cup of tea?"

You should've known better than to accept.

。。。。。

In the present, fingers were now dipping under the elastic of your panties, ghosting across feverish skin and encouraging your whimpers to grow louder.

"Is this what you want, then?" The man's breath tickled one of your ears, rough digits gathering your slickness with practiced ease. And he sounded genuinely concerned too, as if your discomfort was not a consequence of his own machinations. "Because I wanna ease your pain, baby. Give you what you truly need."

He barely even touched you yet you were already struggling not to crumble, the desire governing your mind mixing with the new sensations to create a new delirious kind of torment.

Continuing to tease you, the man was relentless in his torture, barely even brushing over your neediest spots. A gentle press of his palm to stimulate you for a moment before pulling back, much to your shameful frustration; Better than nothing, but not close enough.

In his own way, though, he was urging you to speak up. Expecting you to demand what you truly wanted.

Yet as a retort, all you could come up with was gasping out his name, dripping from your lips like honeyed prayers as your hips fought to buck up against his hand.

A sound you afterward repeated a hundred times over. Chanted until its melody became engraved on your tongue and the man was finally caving in, sliding his fingers inside with a smirk.

He had known you'd end up caving, had planned for it for months now, and yet nothing had prepared him for the actual view.

。。。。。

Shou, actually, had been his username when you first met him. Once upon a time recited with a genuine smile and an eagerness to please, such a far cry from the anguished whines it would later lead up to.

You started frequenting the forum he inhabited a few months back. A place which happened to be a hidden corner of the internet for people who did not just stumble upon it, but actually sought it out. A part of the web where its occupants challenged societal norms and, against what society had tried to condition you all into thinking, chose to voice their taboo Anti-Purge sentiments instead.

Sentiments perhaps born either due to the inherent discriminatory nature of the holiday (why was it that Yanderes were accommodated for, while Darlings barely got a warning before they were made prey?), a need for contrarianism (when opposing open kidnappings, assault and other debauchery became an act of rebellion), or just a tenuous moral high ground which made it unbearable to stomach. Whatever the reason, it was your first time encountering such a density of like-minded peers.

Despite attempting to commit yourself to being a lurker, deciding to never post or reply to others, your days had still quickly become consumed by the need to read each and every topic. You were simply fascinated with this new dark corner of the web.

That was, of course, until the aforementioned Shou became the main focus of your attention, a dash of intriguing brightness to break the monotony of your existence.

And like moths rushing to the flame, your curiosity would be your undoing.

There was something about him that pulled you in (along with many others from the community, which tended to flock on his posts whenever he grazed the forums). His username was clearly just a nickname instead of a carefully crafted pseudonym; profile picture just an image of the back of what you all assumed to be his hair, dual-toned strands catching the light in a hypnotic way.

Truly, his disregard for anonymity within those parts was a bigger statement than you were expecting, almost as commendable as it was dumbfounding. There was the nature of his postings too, never subtle about his inclinations or ideas.

How to disarm and reutilize Purge Traps.

Most effective ways to incapacitate a violent assailant.

Government lies and why they matter.

Faking a BOPC (breach of purge code) and getting away with it.

There was little method to the madness that was his forum activity, besides the hint that he was evidently more knowledgeable about the subject than most. Plus the fact that he was proactive about his advice, actually seeking to teach others to fight back instead of just hide away and hope for the best. For another self-proclaimed Darling, Shou was ruthless with his methods —it was hard not to admire him.

And admire you did, keeping tabs of his sporadic bursts of activity and speeding to try and interact with him whenever you caught him online. You were, to voice it simply, simply star-truck by him (and perhaps becoming a bit of a fangirl).

Because whoever Shou was, it felt like he understood you. And so, against every ounce of your common sense or natural paranoia, you had finally decided to break your golden rule and reach out for the first time since you joined the niche forum.

And not to just leave a vague comment agreeing on public discourse, but to actually send him a private message. In your defense, how were you supposed to know the chains of events your actions would start?

Do you actually believe what you post?, had been your lame conversation starter.

Luckily for you, he did not leave you hanging. You made sure to send the message while he was still active, one of the few days a week you knew he devoted to his presence on the site (and wasn't it slightly creepy, how you had taken the time to learn his schedule by that point?)

I wouldn't be here if I didn't, dry, to the point and leaving you embarrassed to have even sent the first question.

Yet for some reason, something about Shou reverted you back into a middle school kid seeking to impress a way cooler senior.

Perhaps it was what he symbolized (a change for the better), what he appeared to be (everything you wish you were) —whatever it was, your fingers were frantically typing a reply as soon as his appeared on your screen.

I just think it's amazingThe things you know

How you share them with everyone

The way you see through the lies

I just think you're— , your digits hovered over the keyboard as you were about to type out the last sentence before quickly deleting it. Even in your excitement, you knew how obsessed you'd sound if you started complimenting him personally in your very first conversation.

So instead you sent your thoughts on his posts and awaited his answer with bated breath. A few minutes ticked by this time, your anxiety making you count down the seconds in mortified silence, slowly weighted down by your doubts until your notifications for the forum were going off again with a distinct ping.

I've seen your replies around. I think you're great too.

Whatever your hang ups for praising him directly had been, he clearly did not harbor any. As the prongs of nervousness alleviated their hold over your body, you struggled to see any problems with it either…this was a person you had come to idolize, and they thought you were great?

Your smile, while still anxious, was considerable while you quickly responded.

I'm just a n00b. Learning from the pros.

A moment of thought, biting your bottom lip as you decided whether to add a second message or not. Fuck it, you told yourself.

I wasn't even supposed to be posting anything, but you made me wanna reach out.

Was that too forward? Oh god, it was, wasn't it? You must've sounded creepy, must've sounded desperate and…

That's cute. Did my ramblings teach you anything?

An actual squeal left you then, sounding like it came from an altogether different person. You were an adult, with a career and responsibilities… Yet somehow, this stranger online indirectly calling you cute made you more excited than you were comfortable admitting.

Ofc. I didn't even know what a BOPC was before. Didn't know most of the purge traps you mentioned, either.

The spaces between replies were getting smaller, the conversation turning fluent as you both seemed to be staring straight into the screen, waiting for the other to finish typing.

So you really are a n00b then.

Shit, did you fail some sort of forum etiquette by admitting that? Somehow, the need to impress Shou was more palpable than ever.

And you clearly know your stuff. Makes me wanna up my game.

Be more like you, you left unsaid.

So am I your senpai then?

Your fingers froze just above the keyboards, eyes scanning over Shou's last message and reverted back to staring at his profile pic for a solid minute. You would've squealed again, if you weren't so taken aback.

You make it sound like I am, his second message lit up your screen, coming in quickly after your rare pause in replies.

I don't think that's bad, though. Third message from him, and you were close to fainting now.

Then in that case I suppose you are. You wondered whether Shou wouldn't think you were pathetic admitting that, or whether he had been honest by saying he didn't mind...

I've also noticed you agreeing with some of my more polarizing views.

A welcomed change in topics.

You thought to ask him which ones (most of his posts tended to have a polarizing effect, with people finding him either too radicalized or not radicalized enough), but before you could formulate the question you saw the twinkling circles symbolizing he was typing up another sentence.

Do you actually believe them? And now it was his turn to spit your words back at you.

Well, yah. You make compelling arguments.

Color me impressed then, the start of his new retort left your mind spinning. Never met a n00b like you before.

After his declaration, you found yourself writing and rewriting your answer, hesitating on your word choice, and yet pure elation coursed through your veins.

He said he's impressed with me, your brain kept supplying on loop. You had no way of knowing just how much of a lasting impression you were leaving.

I don't wanna stay one tho. I'd like to jump a few levels. Improve.

Barely a moment's notice before his last message provoked a noticeable hitch in your breath.

I can help you with that.

Which, as short of a reply as it was, left you giddier than would’ve been healthier to admit.

Perhaps it could be chalked up to your work shifts growing more monotonous and tiresome, your social life becoming a faint echo of what it used to be, or just the regular wear and tear from a too-plain existence —a routine where you didn’t tend to engage with life, but just passively watched it go by.

Whatever the true reason was, that night you went to sleep with such a wide grin that the apples of your cheeks had started to hurt from the exertion, infinitely excited after getting to talk firsthand with someone you had already come to admire by that point.

It almost made you self-conscious, knowing just how much it all meant to you, how such a small gesture on his part happened to mean the world to you.

But there was really no reason to feel ashamed or overzealous over your own reaction. If you could’ve seen Shou, you would’ve known you weren’t the only one smiling.

。。。。。

Almost as open of a smile as the one adorning his features right now, currently hidden from your view as his fingers set a maddening pace. Tortuously slow at first until his knuckles started brushing against your opening with each thrust.

All you could hear now were the wet sounds of your arousal facilitating his movements, motions whose only purpose seemed to be to drive you more rambling and disoriented by the second.

"Is this what you want? What you need, perhaps?" His usually calm voice was uncharacteristically affected as he gasped against your ear, the torture he was making you endure clearly getting to him as well.

You were much too preoccupied with the waves of pleasure and warmth overflowing your body to give a proper response, but your lack of one did not deter him.

If anything, your needy gasps and whines were the only encouragement he required.

"Don't worry, Y/N. I'll take care of you, make you feel good."

By that point, the hand that had been petting your hair had found its way to your sopping heat too, calloused pads circling around your pearl while the man continued feeding you his eager promises.

"I get you, baby. Just like you get me." So close, your entire body taut and ready to snap. "And you want me to take care of you too, right?"

You weren't conscious enough to understand the implications, your impaired judgment prohibiting you from reading further into the meaning of his words. He sounded so encouraging, so deceivingly tender despite stuffing you full of his fingers as you squirmed on his lap.

All you could do was nod furiously.

And later on, when your senses sadly returned, dedicated yourself to lamenting over which of your actions brought you down this unfortunate path.

。。。。。

Perhaps, your consciousness supplied, it had been the fact that you opened up so readily. That you had dared to share with a supposed new friend, things that should’ve better stayed hidden in the first place.

But goddamn it, you felt downright honored that he even considered you worthy enough to entertain in the first place. From the very first second, Shouto already had the upper hand.

During the first few conversations, the topics you two discussed were all closely related to the purge and your mutual hang ups with it. Concise and carefully typed out messages were exchanged, discussing opinions you had never expected anyone to be interested in hearing—not from you, at least.

But then, as the weeks slowly progressed, the subjects of conversation began shifting to both of your lives, to your occupations, hobbies, and, directly against the forum's policy for privacy, the people you two were outside the confines of your online corner.

Even without actually exchanging any real data or supplying him with your name or age, you found yourself starting to open up more and more with each day.

You told him about your grueling office job, the friends you hadn’t seen or texted in weeks, and the reality of an apartment which more closely resembled a containment cell than a home…

Revelations that you had kept hidden for so long, which now came pouring out without regard for how mortified they made you feel. You were conscious of the limits blurring between you two the further you kept going, of how you were telling him things best left unsaid, cramped and buried in a hard to reach place.

And yet, for some obscure reason, everything Shou represented made it impossible for you to resist the temptation to speak up, to demand to be heard for the first time in an eternity of quietness.

You’re pathetic, is what you expected him to say in return. Pathetic, weak, meager, and worthless. Anticipating him, somehow, to echo all the doubts and deeply held fears you carried inside.

Most of my friends don’t understand either, was instead the response you received. But most people don’t see what's wrong, what needs to be changed. You feel lonely because you do.

It wasn’t clear what you would’ve wanted to hear beforehand, the things you had fantasized someone would reply if you ever gathered the courage to share your anxieties. Whatever those expectations had been an eternity ago, they now vastly paled when compared to what your new friend was dangling in front of you.

It felt like he was giving an excuse for things you had always perceived as personal failings. If what he said was true, it would mean it wasn’t your social ineptitude that kept people away, your uselessness, or uninteresting personality.

It would mean the shadows around you could still be dispelled somehow, exorcising the silhouettes of a suffering that had become a regular companion in your day to day life.

Brandishing a courage that only anonymity could give you, your fingers were a blur on your keyboard as you tried to ignore the rapid heartbeat in your chest, the fear, and exhilaration from opening up for the first time in forever.

Something you would later regret a thousand times over.

And you do too, and it wasn’t a question, a nervous comment or a stuttered retort. With the aid of the text format, you could look as confident as you knew you weren’t. You understand as well.

You understand me, was the tacit meaning behind it. The prickling of unshed tears made it so you were furiously blinking, fighting against the downpour despite your eyes refusing to leave the screen for longer than an instant.

I do. More than you realize.

For all intents and purposes, your first mistake was indeed opening up.

And your second one was being naive enough to let him in. Seriously, why hadn’t you heeded your parent’s advice about stranger danger?

。。。。。

...If they could only see you now, coming apart at the seams and with the name of your tormentor being the only word you were able to string together.

"Such a beauty, and all for me," his praises accompanied you through the rough orgasm ripping through your body, lips kissing your forehead in stark contrast to the digits still pumping inside your heat. "Let me hear your voice, baby. Let me hear how beautiful my name sounds on your lips."

And you obeyed, because what other choice did you have. Mindless, broken, and oh, so needy.

You continued to audibly moan as your climax unwound, crying out his name in absolute reverence while Shouto's smile deepened against your skin. The chill of his touch was still as soothing as ever, calming down the embers of a lust that refused to completely die down.

When he finally pulled his hands from your core, you felt excruciatingly empty. But you were not given enough time to wallow in your despair, because who you once considered your friend was then grasping your face gently between his hands, leading your gaze to meet his—forcing you to witness the intensity and adoration present there.

"My Y/N."

Even in your deeply intoxicated state, the last few dredges of your senses supplied just how utterly abhorrent the situation was.

The sirens signaling the start of the Purge had died down a while ago, drowned out by your own cries of pleasure, but you could still see the remnants of the government logo still plastered all over the TV, its bright glow bathing you both in an eerily scarlet ambiance.

From the same weak place of coherence, a shiver of fear managed to break through your stupor.

"You're going to continue to be a good girl for me, aren't you?"

When he kissed you then, slow and almost ironically hesitant despite what had just transpired moments before, you couldn't begin to tell your body to refuse. Much to your own horror, you were soon eagerly kissing your tormentor back.

。。。。。

The second mistake leading up to your downfall, on the other hand, took a little longer to occur. It was after a few more weeks of conversation. You vented and talked way too much, while Shou listened intently and even rewarded you with a few crumbs of advice of his own.

So wrapped up in your new seemingly innocuous friendship you were in, you failed to recognize the magnitude of an event that should've sent you scrambling to shut off your monitor. A warning so loud it would've put the Purge sirens themselves to shame.

You see, with Shou's help, you were slowly becoming more of an active user around those parts. You didn't just stick to replying to his posts or lurking until he shot you a private message anymore; no, you were now officially a contributor, deciding to step out of your anonymity to share what you thought was a fairly interesting article. It was a rather long-winded thinkpiece on the morality of Darlings’ treatment after the Purge had ended—the reality of that year spent in captivity that most people tended to just brush under the carpet, all in the name of making the entire ordeal more palatable to digest.

In all your eagerness, however, you had failed to realize a very crucial detail, which was that the article was a whole two days old. Already an ancient text by forum's standards, apparently.

So with that in mind, of course you should've expected the hate, an outpouring of bitterness fit for a community of loners and acidic underdogs. You were on an anonymous forum on one of the darkest parts of the internet, somewhere most sane people actively stayed away from—Clearly, a rookie unwittingly reposting something was the perfect target for a lot of your bitter comrades. An excuse to finally take out all of their pent up frustration.

Fuck1ng pleb, thanks for copy-pasting the same post for the 55th time.

This is why we shouldn't let newbies post. Look at this mess @mods.

Time to hang it up, n00b. And by “it”, I mean your f****** neck.

i bet ur a girl, [Username]. u type like a b1tch.

And the icing on the cake for internet interactions, a myriad of wall spamming "KYS" being plastered all across the comment section, bold and daunting as they filled your notification box with the repetitions of hate. If you weren't so sure of your safety behind your screen, perhaps you would've felt intimidated.

As it stood, you were just embarrassed, mortified at the fact that you had seemingly botched your only attempt at leaving a positive first impression. If anything, it only seemed you had given everyone a common enemy to pick on for once...

Or that was, at least, until Shou happened to log in at exactly that precise moment. You knew he was usually busy around that day and time (he never actually told you whether he had a job, but you had surmised as much from your past chats), so his instantly recognizable profile picture and username popping up had you genuinely gasping at first. It was one hell of a coincidence, but you couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief at what looked to be your savior.

Everyone, stop getting your panties in a twist. This is why no new users end up staying, the environment is abhorrent.

It was vague enough not to betray the fact that you two weren’t just strangers anymore, as well as keeping Shou’s reputation as a lone wolf from completely shattering.

And a comment which, surprisingly, instantly dulled most of the incoming messages your post was being flooded with.

People respected him there, his status as a renowned user giving him a genuine sort of power and hold over the rest of the community. One of the first things you had recognized on the forums was the distinct hierarchical structures amongst its users, and there Shou might’ve as well be granted the title of mayor for all the weight his every sentence carried.

Or at least they did with the majority of the community. As in every place where large numbers of people gathered, there were always a few rotten apples just begging to be tossed.

and ofc ur whiteknighting for her, Shou The Great. shes sucking ur dick under evry single post u make

You cringed, studying the bitter user that had decided to be a contrarian and easily recognizing him from unsavory past encounters you witnessed. Although, if you were completely honest, this time you couldn't exactly say his words didn't carry a certain degree of validity.

Shou had told you he was glad that was the case with you, that his post resonating with anyone was one of the main reasons why he hadn't just disappeared from the site completely. But in reality, saying you weren't subtle about your agreement with his ideas would be an understatement.

You were like a puppy skipping behind him, trailing his interactions and always ready to write an eager comment backing him up. Yet you had never thought others actually paid attention to your mostly one-sided interactions, the occasional meager downvote or emote being the only thing that made you aware your comments weren’t just lost in the sea of spam Shou’s posts were usually showered in.

For the longest time, your support had just felt like leaving letters for the man to find. Letters you hadn’t even been sure had reached their target until a few weeks back...

Suddenly, the sharp sound of Shou's incoming reply drove you from your tribulations.

Well, maybe if you weren't such a crude man you wouldn't be permabanned from starting topics yourself. Although I doubt anyone would be sucking your dick either way, shitty ideology considered. [Image attached]

A grimace was quick to grow on your face as you aptly studied the picture Shou decided to close his reply with.

It was a screenshot of what looked to be someone's post history, a rather extensive list with alarmingly offensive titles such as "Why male darlings should be spared", "The purge is a form of cuckoldry" and “Feminist agenda: female yanderes and their biological advantage [Repost]". Almost all of them exhibited a tragic downvote ratio right as well, besides the red symbol signaling the posts had been archived by senior users or mods.

For someone who also loathed the terrible holiday, it was almost admirable how the man managed to be almost as detestable as the criminals you all rallied against.

But even so, what disturbed you the most wasn't the clear bigotry of the user, but the fact that that screenshot couldn't have been taken from public records. A user's post history was hidden, just another measure on the site’s part to keep people from recognizing too many details about each other and possibly endangering themselves.

No, it could only have been taken from inside the account. And judging from the other guy's quick reaction, you weren't the only one who came to that realization.

how the fck did u get that

I knew u were friends with the mods. fcking rats

By that point, everyone else had stopped clogging the comments and, you assumed, instead opted to settle down and attentively observe the events transpiring. Apart from the emote reactions and the rapidly rising number of upvotes on Shou’s comments, you had all become a passive audience to the public ridicule.

Although you couldn’t help feeling slightly disjointed by Shou’s behavior. Below your wicked sense of pride at having him defend you, there was still the whispers of your gut telling you the man was going a little too far, his actions spelling a more sinister meaning than just “having a friend’s back”.

You've been here for years, Minoru. Surprised you haven't yet noticed how much of a pest everyone sees you as.

Minoru? You did a double-take, going back to read the username of the guy Shou was arguing with. But he just had a randomly generated number as a pseudonym, same as you and most others, and with just a picture of some anime sneezing girl to distinguish his profile from the rest. No trails or signs of what could Shouto be referencing to.

Nothing but an option you preferred not to consider. But it couldn't be, could it? your friend wouldn’t...

fucking delete that right now, man.

this isn't a joke, DELETE THAT.

Only that the abrasive and desperate reaction told you everything you needed to know. Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, shock mixing with equal parts horror and amazement you couldn’t even begin to try and disentangle. Because right that second, you were witnessing your friend breaking the forum’s number one rule with a front-row seat to the spectacle.

And he was doing it all in your name.

Then maybe think twice before you go out of your way to harass newbies. Or have you had too much time on your hands after being fired, is that it?

It was vague enough not to represent any kind of threat... if not for the context of the site. And yet you all knew the hidden message behind it, the warning for whoever Minoru was to understand Shou knew much more than what he was letting on. That he could expose much more than he was currently alluding to.

y are u even doing this, shou? y do u care wtf happens to this noobslut anyways?

Shou's reply took barely a moment to appear, lighting up your screen and, despite the slightly morbid nature of his protection, coaxing out a smile to adorn your lips. It was like a balm being applied to your worries, quieting down most of your incipient concerns in favor of rejoicing.

They're a friend.

For fuck’s sake, you even screenshotted that for posterity. Somehow, him acknowledging the new bond you two had openly felt like a milestone.

When a mod came in to archive the post and give everyone involved a stern warning later on, you were already way past your previous doubtful sentiments.

Instead, the last thing you did before going to sleep that day was to open up your private conversation with Shou and send a quick yet heartfelt message of gratitude his way.

Months prior, you wouldn’t have ever thought you’d be thanking anyone for semi doxxing another human being. How rapidly things were changing, though, and all while you got lost in the thrill of mattering.

Thanks for sticking up for me. It meant a lot, you typed feeling slightly lightheaded, drunk on the idea that anyone would think you worthy of having your back.

You thought Shou went offline after dishing out his not so thinly veiled threats, but somehow he was back again in an instant, the sound of notifications going off shaking any remnants of your exhaustion.

Anything for you, [Y/N].

You were so tired, it didn't occur to you that you hadn't yet shared your real name with your friend either.

That night, for once, you fell asleep with a twinkle in your eye and the image of Shou's multicolored locks dancing against your eyelids. Imagining, ever so briefly, your fingers trailing down the back of a neck you now had memorized from analyzing his profile picture.

And, while you slept with your phone clutched to your side, you also failed to notice the peculiar sound of your own camera going off, the soft glow from the red light beside your lense bathing your features in its subtle illumination, flickering against your eyelashes and the lingering grin on your curved lips.

You truly looked angelic like that.

Suffice it to say, Minoru never bothered you again after that day. In fact, his name disappeared from the site not too soon after.

。。。。。

But now, to continue the grueling task of giving a context for your inevitable end, it is necessary to jump a month further into the future, barely a week from the excruciating present.

Because it was then that the last strike finished nailing the coffin of your proverbial undoing, burying you under the weight of your own ignorance.

You got your notice in the mail on the Day of Announcements, an inconspicuous letter lacking any further distinction beyond a scarlet government seal emblazoned across its front. But even before you opened and read the message, you already knew of its contents—easily recognizing the image before you from several of the varied posts you had seen floating around on the forums lately.

Purge Notice!!! Help needed Urgently.

Just got my letter. Do I stay hidden or fight back? [Open poll]

Third time getting mine. AMA about my methods.

The range of how you had seen other users reacting to their own selections was diverse, with some of them being more experienced while others, such as you, had just gotten their first letter ever. If things played out differently for you, then you were sure you would've been another one of the numerous panicked voices, awkwardly trying to maneuver their way out of their new situation.

And maybe, then, your odds wouldn't have been so completely fucked from the start.

As it stood, as soon as you laid eyes on the notice, the first thing you thought of was how quickly you could boot up your computer and open the forum’s private messages. Because, for the first time in forever, you were overwhelmed by the feeling of someone else being there for you.

Shou was your friend, had earned that spot fair and square after months of listening to you venting and sharing deep discussions; faster than you could even realize it, and so it was only natural for you to seek his help once the news of your selection for the new yearly Purge reached you.

He had even threatened another user for your sake, for fuck’s sake. So, really, what harm could come out of relying on someone you were sure was trustworthy?

Maybe it was too late by that point for you to snap out of it, but it was almost amusing seeing you being so easily deceived.

Just another reason why you needed him, certainly.

。。。。。

Already told you I'd have your back, had been his immediate reply barely an instant after you attached a candid photo of your hand holding up the envelope. Whatever you need, I’m here.

His lack of hesitation was palpable through your screen, heart hammering in your chest as you were faced with a kindness you had thought yourself undeserving of not long ago.

As soon as you closed your mailbox, you had immediately raced to send him the message, completely foregoing telling any of your other friends or family members when you doubted they would even understand you in the first place. Shou had been right when he told you people just didn’t want to see the truth, even if it slapped them right in the face, leaving dark imprints in the shape of their narrow mindedness.

But he was there, he was letting you know as much, in his own words. And for what felt like the hundredth time in the past few months, you felt incredibly lucky to have stumbled upon the Forums in the first place, to have traced whatever fortunate path had led you to find him—the one person able to distinguish you in a world you always thought you blended straight into.

Thank you, Shou, for everything. And at that moment, you really had been truthful, so much so that there were tears prickling at your eyes, an overwhelming feeling of gratitude drowning you with its intensity.

Indeed, your final mistake had been your desperate need for acceptance. A need that had, in the end, cost you everything.

You can call me Shouto now. No use for nicknames anymore.

Amidst the chaos of your life possibly crashing down all around you, somehow his revelation put a trembling smile back in your face.

Then allow me to repeat: thank you, Shouto.

Np, Newbie. Told you I'd help you level up, didn't I?

His teasing managed to garner a small stuttering laugh out of you despite the dreadfulness of your situation.

But you couldn’t help it. Somehow, every reply Shouto sent you only served to wrap the illusion of safety tighter around you. So tight in fact, that you should’ve started worrying about suffocating.

。。。。。

On the other side of the screen, the man with the multicolored hair couldn’t help but keep staring at the picture you had sent him earlier.

He was transfixed, eyes almost unblinking as they refused to separate from the image. The way your fingers tentatively held the letter up for the picture was simply adorable to him. Beautifully naive.

It wasn't like he hadn't seen your face before, like he hadn't already memorized the texture of your skin and the everlasting trace of a frown always threatening to dampen your mood. He read your expressions like poetry, every mole and scar furthering the securing of his interest.

But this was the first picture you had actually chosen to send him out of your own volition, the final symbol of a trust he had worked so tirelessly to earn. Used to catching prey as he was, the man wasn’t entirely sure when you had turned from a game into a priority, from a priority into the only thing he could even make himself care for.

And it didn’t help that it was his letter you were holding, too. His formal declaration of pursuit.

With time, Shouto was sure you would find it in yourself to appreciate the beauty of such irony.

But, for now, what he really needed to do was buy some tea. Couldn’t have your own stubbornness ruining your first encounter, could he?

。。。。。

In the coming weeks, your friend aided you and even coached you as you jointly planned for the horrific holiday, not only suggesting ideas but tracing the safety measures needed for them to succeed. You really had no reason to doubt him by that point.

That evening, after you finished letting Shouto know you were back from work, you made sure to pack all of your supplies into an inconspicuous bag you had acquired for the occasion. Whoever your Yandere was, it was best to not give any hints of your new acquisitions, just in case they were already stalking your movements.

Shouto had helped you devise the list, mentoring you in your selection of weapons as well as self-defense arsenal—what brands of pepper spray to get, which ammunitions were most efficient and reliable, even what kind of clothing was the least troublesome if the need to escape ever arose. If you had been sure he knew his craft before, now you were surprised at just how vast his wisdom genuinely was.

After the last few finishing touches of preparations, you were already on your way to the direction you had both agreed on (supplied by him, approved by you). There were several hours until the start of the Purge still, but the adrenaline swimming through your bloodstream was already considerable.

Shouto had suggested you visited him for the Holiday, quoting how the measures in place for his home made it nothing short of a fortified vault, impossible for any outsiders to break into (and for anyone to break out of, but let's not get ahead of ourselves).

With that in mind, how could you have refused his offer? Your place was barely an excuse for an apartment, windows that didn't entirely close, and feeble doors that could be easily broken into. Even if you weren't partly driven by the curiosity of meeting your new internet idol turned friend, it would've been foolish to decline.

So in a few hours, you were sporting a nervous smile on your face as you parked your car in front of the largest apartment complex you had ever encountered. It was luxurious in a way you had only seen staring back at you from a television screen, marble, and gold accents giving you the impression you were about to step into a drama set instead of visiting an online friend.

Before the surrealism of the entire situation could begin to set in, however, you noticed the young man sitting on the ample stairs of the building. He had an air of effortless elegance, tall and lithe, yet sporting a black turtleneck which hugged his frame and made it clear just how much sheer strength hid behind his movements.

And he also sported the same peculiarly colored locks you had already memorized from the last few months, the light softly reflecting on them proving to be an even more impressive show when admired live.

You were dazzled for an instant, wondering if, somehow, this entire thing was a prank and the Shou from the forums had just schemed his way into making a fool out of you in front of a handsome stranger. Way too convoluted, yet entirely too plausible to your bewildered self.

Until the man lifted his eyes—as beautifully dual-toned as his hair, and catching sight of you standing just beside your recently parked vehicle.

"Y/N," he was sharply climbing to his feet as he called out your name, the shy hint of a smile in his lip contradicting the monotone cadence of his tone. "Good to finally meet you."

You had first been under the impression that the Shou you knew was cold, the way he interacted with others on the site reminding you of an emotionless robot at times, but the man addressing you seemed like he was ripped straight out of a stereotypical rom-com.

Maybe he'd be the aloof, tormented heir? Which, in your fantasy drama land, would make you the nearly illiterate and poor love interest. Your feelings of inadequacy only grew at the comparison.

Almost cute, how that had been one of your greatest worries once upon a time. How foolishly eager you were to be liked back then.

"Shouto." The name still felt somewhat strange on your lips, even after he had insisted you started calling him that. "It's good to meet you, too."

He was by your side in an instant, taking your bags from you swiftly and shutting the door to your ride. From this up close, it became considerably harder to disguise your staring.

Even the scar which covered his left eye, a splash of reddish textured skin, somehow came across like yet another enhancer of his appeal. An underlying harshness which you couldn't help but be intrigued by.

"Your hair looks even better in person."

And leave it to you to once again find a way to screw first impressions. You were chastising yourself a mere second after the words left your mouth.

But Shouto only sent you that same hint of a smirk your way, his eyes appearing genuinely pleased at your praise. If he thought you were a weirdo and was regretting ever inviting you to his house, then he was a good enough actor for you to be fooled.

And fooled you he did, but with completely different intentions.

"You look just like in your pictures," came his serene retort not long after.

Which you assumed was a joke, keeping in mind that the only photo you had ever sent his way had been of the Purge letter you received a few days ago.

Laughing lightly, you tried to ignore the nerves tugging at your chest before catching up with him on the steps of the building.

As you giddily barged straight into the open jaws of the beast, it once again struck Shouto how utterly unsuspecting you were. How you trusted him so wholeheartedly.

He couldn't wait to see it all come crashing down.

。。。。。

Inside his honest to god penthouse, your previous feeling of insufficiency only became more severe.

The interiors were decorated sparingly, albeit fashionably. Filled with different muted shades and being unexpectedly traditional in the way they were designed. It was a stunning abode, even if you couldn't help but mentally point out how utterly unlived in it appeared.

There was not a single cup, shoe, or book out of place, everything perfectly polished and organized to the point that you felt hesitance as your sock-covered feet continued making their way through the place.

"Make yourself at home," Shouto told you most matter-of-factly. If you weren't so sure of his intentions by now, perhaps you would've thought he was being sarcastic.

Without any of your belongings to distract yourself with, you instead gravitated towards what you could see of the kitchen through one of the sliding doors.

It was very modern despite the rest of the aesthetic the penthouse sported, shiny stainless steel and spotless dark countertops. It should've looked out of place when paired with the carpeted floors, wooden furniture, and sparse pieces of classical Japanese art…

Yet somehow, it strangely fits. Just like his owner, you supposed, thinking back to the oddities that amounted to his unique brand of appeal.

And you really needed to stop thinking of your friend like that.

When you heard the door to the apartment being audibly locked with a resounding click, you instantly stopped your fingers grazing the smooth countertops. Your instincts flared up with worry for a moment, right before you forcefully willed yourself to calm down.

After reminding yourself of the true reason why you were there, the exhale you released next was one of clear relief.

"Want something to drink?" Shouto appeared in your line of sight again, hands buried in the pockets of his pants and looking like the picture of composure.

You felt embarrassed once again, knowing he had given you a free pass to roam but still somewhat self-conscious about intruding on his space.

"You don't need to make me anything. I'm fine." Your timbre was apologetic, not used to slipping into the role of a guest just yet.

He seemed strangely dissatisfied with your answer, closing some of the distance between you with a presence that had you almost flinching back for a second.

There was an intensity in his gaze, something which you could not quite yet place.

"But I want to be a good host. So let me." He appeared very serious about it, too, with his face growing stern as his peculiar eyes bore into yours.

Not wanting to cause further distress, you imagined relenting would be the best course of action.

It was like you were molded to be the perfect Darling, so wonderfully meek and gullible.

"Okay then. Water is fine."

Yet Shouto shook his head, still somewhat dissatisfied with your answer.

"Tea it is." His phrasing allowed little space for argument. "I know you mentioned liking a few brands before, so I took the liberty of stocking up on them."

A surprising burst of laughter broke through your anxious feelings then, drawing Shouto's eyes again from the particular cabinet they had drifted to as he mentioned the beverages.

He looked at you puzzled, an unasked question written all over his otherwise blank expression, and so you decided to reply from the surge of unexpected amusement you were experiencing.

"It's only a night, Shou," you didn't even realize you had slipped back into his nickname, too entertained by how much he had apparently overdone his hospitality. "There really wasn't any need for you to go buy my favorite teas."

His eyes blinked quite slowly your way, his expression back to his vacant mask before a smile reappeared.

"I wanted you to feel welcomed," he supplied as he approached the cabinet he was eyeing before, dedicating himself to searching for whatever kind of flavor of tea he had in mind.

In response, you just shrugged your shoulders with another chuckle.

"And I didn't get you anything. You're making me feel even more out of place."

"Nonsense," he cut you off in that deadpan way of his, hands rummaging through the most ridiculously vast tea collection you had ever seen. And then he added, decidedly quieter, "today is supposed to be about you, after all."

Too bad you didn't pick up on it.

When he ushered you back to the salon with barely a wave next, pointing at one of the cushions arranged around the short-legged table, you decided to follow his suggestion and wait there while he finished brewing the drinks. By now, you understood the futility of offering any kind of help when he was still so intent on properly welcoming you.

So, curious as you were, your eyes continued to inspect each and every inch of the apartment, drinking up all the pieces of info you could observe, that you didn't even think of the potential dangers of letting a stranger fix you a cup while you weren't looking.

Unbeknownst to the other, you were both actively counting down the seconds until the Purge started, minds lost to your own inner turmoils from opposite sides of the suite.

And for entirely different reasons, you were both filled with anticipation.

。。。。。

Meanwhile, finally back in the present after retracing the steps that guided you there, it was becoming increasingly hard to compartmentalize the chaos brewing inside you.

Shouto’s lips were the personification of hunger against yours, an inescapable gluttony to mark and consume every single inch of you he could encompass.

After a hint of understanding returned to your body post-orgasm, your vision and the sensations you endured were becoming disturbingly vivid. It was impossible to conceive anything beyond his hands ridding you of your flimsy camisole, palms cold in comparison to the heat you felt, splaying against your sides and slowly making their way up the sensitive mounds of your chest.

“All mine, baby.” You barely registered his teeth nipping at your bottom lip until a shock of pain snapped you out of your trance.

He bit you, and quite harshly too, but when you tried to instinctually pull back his response was to hold you even tighter. Before you could attempt to voice your complaints, his tongue was darting out to clean up the droplets of blood he spilled.

“Out of all the Darlings I’ve played with, you’re the only one I’ve ever even considered keeping, you know?”

And now that had you freezing, even amidst the cloud of desire still muddling your cognizance. His arms pressed you closer still, forcing you to bury your face against his chest, completely unphased by the bloody mess your mouth had morphed into.

Had he tricked others before then? Was that the reason why he was even on the Forums in the first place?

You wanted to ask him what he meant, wanted to demand explanations for a phrase that had dread closing around your neck like a noose. But whatever he slipped into your drink to keep you so awfully responsive and pliable, also appeared to make forming any complex sentences incredibly hard…

Shou, ever the receptive one, caught onto your change in demeanor rather aptly. His face nuzzled your hair softly, humming a calming melody as if you were a scared child who could be so easily reassured. Meanwhile, his hands hadn’t abandoned your breasts, still tenderly kneading them with a touch bordering on worship.

“But I’m glad you weren’t my first, baby. Means I could be all ready for when we met.” He rocked you both as he rested his back further on the sofa, opening his legs wider below you and forcing you to settle closer to his clothed groin with a whimper.

Your arms reached out to grasp his shoulders while you tried to stabilize yourself, the strain of his erection resting snuggly against your still sensitive slit.

"Helped me to know when to pull back," he kept confessing, purposefully thrusting into you while he kept lovingly massaging your chest, fingers twisting your hardened peaks to coax a new kind of mewl to be uttered against his skin. "Wouldn't want you to break now that I've finally found you."

The fact that your bodies seemed to fit so perfectly, even in your impaired state, was not an irony lost on you.

Abruptly, Shouto stopped fondling your breasts in order to maneuver your face again, both of your stares meeting in a vehement standoff before he continued.

“I’ll make this as close to perfection as I can, I promise you.” And you got a direct view of the vulnerability in his uniquely colored eyes, the nature of his words clearly heartfelt despite the atrocities they alluded to.

As you heard him drag his zipper down, the hand clutching your jaw trembling in anticipation, you couldn’t help the new wave of warmth spreading through your body, negating all the fear and anxiousness warring inside you in order to shamefully expose your baser desires.

Now that whatever had been clouding your judgment was pulling back slightly, your thought process had begun to snap back into place, overflowing you with a terrible sense of shame at your own reactions.

He gave you something earlier with your drink, you were sure of it, and yet you couldn’t help but still be horrified at just how much you were enjoying it. Once you felt the flushed head of his cock placidly rubbing against your thigh, the sounds leaving your mouth weren’t ones of complaint, peril or dissent.

Quite the contrary, actually, and it only made Shouto grow bolder.

As the hand clutching your face grew tenser, gripping you with force before tugging harshly, you got the hint. Now painfully following his lead, it wasn't long before the previous pressure against your legs was now resting directly against your cunt.

The pre-cum already gathered on him mixed in with your still oozing arousal, smearing the span of your outer lips as he lightly teased you one last time.

You were so mortified by that point, that if he had offered to end your embarrassment right then and there with one of the several weapons you knew he kept, you would’ve been very inclined to accept.

“... I didn’t even think there was such a thing as 'The One' before, actually.” You hadn’t even realized the man was still talking, ardent whispers getting lost on the intensity of the situation.

His eyes were searching your face, a satisfied twinkle lighting them up as soon as you returned his stare of your very own volition. Perturbed, you wondered if his delusion made him see anything beyond a twisted mix of lust and fear reflected back at him.

“But I now know just how wrong I was, Y/N.” So sure of himself, tone back to the stern cadence you previously associated with him for a moment, gripped by a gravity befitting of his obsession. “Indeed, I think you were always meant to be my darling… don't you agree?”

To your credit, you did struggle to speak up, to gain back the control over a body which had stopped listening long ago. Too bad you only managed a single pitiful word out.

“Shouto…”

But before you could even fathom attempting a better response, he was breaching into you, sheathing himself with an ease you wished you could overlook, turning your voice from an anguished plea into outrageously labored moans.

You had once thought Shou had been interested in you because he somehow perceived you as anything but pathetic, but you were beginning to think it had been your weakness which drew him in all along.

So deliciously frail, that even a predator like him had been driven with an urgent need to protect you. To break you down, just so he could be the one to build you back together.

As he started fucking you with shallow thrusts, hips bucking up from the sofa while he tenderly guided you until your body was mimicked his motion on its own, you couldn’t help but be the most disturbed at his oddly affectionate ways.

As awful as it sounded, now that your mind had awakened from its stupor all you wanted was for him to bend you over and abuse you, manhandle you and mistreat you in a way which unequivocally screamed assault. You wanted bruises painting your skin, proof that you hadn’t just willingly given up and facilitated your own ruin.

He was humiliating you despite the pretty words he decided to disguise it as—showing you how easily he could own you and even make you enjoy it, drug-addled drink or not.

But as his mouth latched around one of your hardened nipples, sucking generously until his name was once again fast on your tongue, you also couldn’t deny the crystal clear responses you were giving.

You could attempt to lie to yourself later, could swear it was all a delusion born out of the deranged man's mind, but the particular brand of your screams was unmistakable.

When your own hand reached down to facilitate your release, you knew you were already acting beyond what you could've previously attributed to the drugs. Toying with your bundle of nerves, you rested your forehead against Shouto's shoulders, tears from the pleasure mixing in with the subjacent agony of your guilt.

Why did it have to feel so good? And how far did the drugs truly affect you? Or had they just peeled back your inhibitions perhaps, baring you until all you had were dark desires and no self-control to contain them.

You still tasted blood inside your mouth when your walls started clenching around his cock, the coppery flavor entirely too vivid on your tongue. Hearing his own choked groans gasping against your chest, you felt his mouth abandoning your bud with a pop before his kisses were trailing a path back up—eager in their search of your face, your lips.

You were still cumming by the time a lascivious kiss connected you two again, unwinding in his grasp until his hands were the only thing keeping you whole.

“Even if I wasn't taught how,” he began promising while his rhythm grew frantic, barely resisting the allure of your core fluttering around him. “I promise I’ll love you, Y/N. Love you so good, you won’t ever want to leave when the next Purge comes.” He was getting increasingly excited by his own words, imagining a future where you did not need the aid of a little cup of tea to eagerly kiss back. “I’ll fuck you every day, fill you up and show you just how much I care. How much you matter.”

Faced with his degenerate promises, all you could do was gasp out his name one last time, perhaps seeking to express your reticence, perhaps oddly excited by the image he was painting.

You indulged him in the pitiful sound of your whimpers molding around its syllables, and it wasn’t long before you were coaxing him to join you with an orgasm of his own.

He actually came inside, you recognized inwardly after the aftershocks of enjoyment now quieted down to a lull, a new type of dread quickly following the realization. His cum was still shooting in hot ropes, stuffing you to the brim with the intent and purpose of a man bent on marking you, owning you.

But Shouto was so loving as he kissed you time and time again, painfully reminding you of just how nice he could be for you, how gentle and attentive. It made the lines between your tormentor and a traditional lover blur even further, the confusion clouding your sense not merely born out of narcotics any longer.

You had been so preoccupied with a monster outside your house once. A creature ripped from the kind of movies that were ripe with cheap scares and considerably cheaper thrills.

But monsters never were like that in real life, were they? As the man continued to cradle you in his arms like the most vulnerable of creatures, you were suddenly struck by how glaringly obvious things should’ve been from the beginning.

Because your Yandere’s obsession had not come with claws and a row of sharp teeth. No, it came instead with a suit of deception to hug its frame, the bait of acceptance, and the promise of a reliable ear to comfortably listen. It arrived with whispers that assured you that you were not alone, that it was not you who was flawed, but the world for not welcoming you.

It dangled everything your little heart desired, so by the time you were reaching out, you were simply too distracted to notice the dangers of the abyss you were throwing yourself at.

Luckily for you, Shouto had made such a void his home. And for however long it took you to consider the darkness as your own, his was a kind of hospitality that no amount of your struggles could ever hope to wear down.

And if the worst came to pass, if you kept stubbornly refusing and fighting despite your odds? Well…

He could always brew you another cup of tea.

-------

Well, I can finally rest now 💀

This monster of a one-shot took me a lot longer than expected, so I ended up being a lil later to the collab that I would’ve liked. Either way, I’d really appreciate hearing any feedback or opinions on either the fic or art (or both?)... I swear that’s what keeps me motivated ;___;

So fr, thanks to everyone who takes the time to let me know your takes! y’all are the bests of the best 🖤 And speaking of bests of best, special thanks and gratitude to the actual angels who helped and gave me feedback for both the art and/or fic @reinawritesbnha , @drxwsyni, @wootato, @snappysnapo and @coyambition. Don’t catch me seeing y’all drop your crowns bc it’s on sight 😠 👑

#bnha fanart #todoroki #yandere todoroki #todoroki x reader #bnha imagines #bnha #mha fanart #bnha x reader #todoroki fanart #todoroki smut #todoroki shouto #todoroki shoto #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #anime fanart #bnha smut #bnha art #artists on tumblr #just art tingz

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ohsalome · 3 years

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An anonymous ukrainian soldier shared his first-hand experience witnessing genocide of the ukrainian people in russian-controlled territory. I translated the text, hoping that English-speaking audience will at least begin to understand what kind of hell we are dealing with. This is why we are furious at West and "ordinary russians" for the indifference for the crimes commited on our land.

I'll add the original text as a proof. My translation below. Apologies that it's badly translated - at this moment i prioritize quantity over quality.

Please share. I want the world to be horrified enough to act.

How I escaped the Russians and what I can tell about them.

For obvious reasons, I won’t be sharing many details. My group, as a part of Territorial Defense, fought the Russian forces in X city. We managed to fight back the first wave, but with the second they used more force and military equipment. As a result, our group split and some people, me included, were left in the rear.

For the next four days, we tried to get to the Ukrainian positions. We changed into civilian clothes, crawled through the fields and even got captured. Saw all the grim details of russian army “not harming civilians”.

This is the most important thing I want to share.

If people in Kherson or Melitopol are brave enough to jump under the tanks and organize rallies, this is because they have access to phones and the internet. In towns and villages that are cut off from the world, the picture is very different.

Civilians are shot at sight. For no apparent reason. Just for fun. Of all ages or genders.

The road towards the “prisoners camp” is flooded with corpses of eldrely people. Some were trying to get some food or water or visit their neighbors, but occupants didn’t give a fuck. Every 10 meters lies a different corpse.

One of the Russians who was talking to refugees shot an elderly man in front of me. Because he didn’t walk where this orc wanted him to do. Because he wanted to get some food to feed his disabled mother.

On the way to the “camp” Russians started shooting at the refugees. Some people, me among them, managed to run away during the chaos.

Russians cut access to electricity, water and heat (translator’s note - it’s still winter in Ukraine, the temperature at night can average from 0C to -10C depending on the region, and small villages are usually even colder than that). Only Russians are allowed to enter supermarkets and pharmacies. Ukrainians who try to buy some food are killed on spot, and their corpses are left to lie near the entrances.

People hate Russians viciously. My Russian accent made them furious. Because it is russians who are committing genocide against them today, in 2022. There isn’t a single person left who wouldn’t call Russians bastards.

All the military equipment is stationed near houses and apartment complexes. Russians kick out people from their homes and force them to live in cold basements. Artillery is stationed near a kindergarten, because they know ukrainians won’t shoot at their own children. And this answers the question why they don’t allow evacuation: they are using these people as a living shield.

When I was nearing the Ukrainian position, I met a couple of local men. They were burying a woman and her daughter that died during an artillery attack. When I asked them for directions in Russian, they attacked me, yelling and cursing.

I am telling you all this not to spread panic, but to explain that the main russophobe of this planet is Putin.

His politics and his cronies are doing everything to spread hatred towards Russians all over the world. Since 2016 I have been defending “normal russians” in Ukraine, saying that they are our allies in the fight against Putin, that they aren’t responsible for him, they didn’t choose him, the revolution against him is near. And for what end? While these monsters are commiting a genocide of ukrainian people, the main concern of “normal russians” is fighting russophobia in instagram.

I want the war to end, I want ukrainian children to stop dying, I want peaceful cities to be free from air bombings. You, Russians, want the war to end so that you can eat a Bigmac and buy an Ikea table. We are not the same. I don’t know what needs to happen for me to stop hating you.

#ukraine #україна #war in ukraine #russia

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daily-dose-of-imagines · 3 years

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(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Matchup ♥

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Naruto, One Piece, and Free Match-Up Request

May I request another match-up but for Free, One Piece, and Naruto this time? :) Here’s all my info once more!

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 25

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory. I work 12 hours (5:30pm to 6am) on a rotating schedule.

Birthplace: Memphis, TN, USA. I was raised in the neighborhood called Frayser which is the most impoverished area in Memphis and has a high crime rate as expected.

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2) My full birth chart can be found here

Enneagram: 5w6

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body. I also have really bad scars on my left arm from being bitten by a dog.

Hair Color/Style: Black and naturally curly but I keep it flat-ironed so it’s straight. It’s long and goes down to just below my shoulder blades. There are times when I will have braids put in of various lengths.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Dress Style: I usually dress up in a casual way, just throwing on whatever looks good at the time but I will sometimes put in the effort when the time calls for it or when I’m in a good mood. I have an affinity for the punk, emo, and goth styles and I rarely wear feminine clothes but I will wear something risky every once in a while.

Hobbies/Interests: Video games, reading, writing, anime, internet surfing, listening to music, politics (sometimes), watching movies/TV shows, basically being an overall nerd. I’m usually either on my laptop or one of my many video game consoles if I’m not on my phone or reading one of my books.

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood, corruption/injustice, close-mindedness

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude and mean, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

Many of my friends say that I’m very sweet and kind which I usually am if I’m in a good mood as well as affectionate as hell. Hugs and pet names galore with me! However only my friends and family see that side of me. My language is often unfiltered, harsh, foul, and blunt which shocks people because they think I’m a pure angel. I say what I want when I want and no one tells me otherwise. If they do, they can expect a mouthful from me. I’m an escapist and very imaginative, can be a bit scatterbrained at times, and I’m methodical and detailed to the point of perfectionism. I’m usually a walking contradiction in terms of personality in so many ways to the point where the real me is almost impossible to decipher. To make matters more complicated, I’m not very good at expressing myself verbally and prefer to let my actions do the talking. I also express myself better through written form.

I have many pet peeves and I get annoyed easily in general. I’m also slowly embracing misanthropy and nihilism but I can be pretty idealistic so it balances out. I’m practically zero tolerance when it comes to bullshit. I hate confrontation and conflict but I’m starting to work on it so I can be less passive-aggressive and more assertive. I also wish to stand up for myself more often than I should so people won’t think that I’m weak and an easy target. I’m pretty cynical which is to be expected and usually expect the worst from people. When someone angers me, I will either just withdraw altogether and completely cut them off (slam the door basically) or get in their face and go off before doing the former. I’m the “hold my anger in and release it all at once” type but I hope to change that one day and stop letting things fester before they get out of hand. I can be quite petty and even cold as well and if someone wrongs me, they will have to make the first move to mend fences. I refuse to apologize if I’m not in the wrong and I will not accept gaslighting/guilt tripping. I also refuse to change for others and will admit to having quite a lot of pride but that’s mostly due to me not wanting to be hurt and manipulated, mistreated, or used.

I have issues with trust and a wild imagination to boot. I usually trust my instincts and can see right through bullshit. I don’t like taking risks and I have to know all the details when I do something so I don’t mess up and look like an idiot. I am indeed a perfectionist and introverted to a fault which often prevents me from trying new things and going outside my comfort zone. I haven’t been in a relationship yet and am still a virgin due to my issues with trust and not wanting to be hurt or humiliated as well as being quite picky/perfectionistic with the people I allow in my life. I have high standards for both people and myself although I’m pretty laid-back and my dislike of conflict allows me to also take a lot of shit from people too before I eventually say “fuck it” and slam the door or go off on them. I don’t think very highly of myself and can sometimes fall into a period of self-hatred and self-pity.

Many people praise me for my intelligence which is fitting since I’m an intellectual. My ideals and beliefs are rather odd to say the least (I’m a classical liberal/independent and despise most ideologies/ideas. This includes religion, feminism, social justice, traditionalism, statism, big government, nationalism, socialism/communism, etc.) and I feel misunderstood because of it (mostly because of the black community ostracizing me). I am indeed a rebel, open-minded, and a free thinker. No one tells me how to think or feel or else they face my wrath. I highly value power over myself and I think it’s the most important thing that a person needs in order to survive. I am definitely an outcast at heart and I often distance myself from others and don’t like talking about my feelings or beliefs because I think most people lack the ability/capacity to understand me. Before I give my opinion on something, I like to do as much research as possible as well as look at things from all perspectives before coming to my own conclusion. I don’t mind discussing things but I prefer logic over emotion when doing so which makes it damn near impossible these days for me to have an real conversation without insults and threats being thrown (usually towards me). Chances are I’m gonna find something wrong with damn near anything someone believes in or says and I’m not afraid to call it out when I see it. Once I do open up and express how I feel, the gates of passion will open up and never close. I also have high morals and values and stick to my guns no matter what which can make me pretty stubborn at times.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well as irregular, prolonged periods. These things are pretty annoying for me to deal with whenever they flare up.

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Hello @sacredwarrior88 and thank you so much for requesting with us! I am so sorry that this came out so late, but I do hope you enjoy this!

>Admin 𝕋

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

𝐼 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽…

Ace! I feel that you and ace would be such a great couple! He is open minded and kind to others whereas you are the same way! You are passionate like he is, caring like he is, loyal to the bone like he is! He would see you and see your personality and just instantly fall in love you and your personality! Like, I can’t even imagine how much he will want you on his crew, so they he can keep on you and protect you at all times-- though he will soon figure out that you don’t need help, you can take care yourself--which he will find extremely attractive, no doubt about that!

He will love that fact that you are independent, because he really values individualism and independency, he sees it as a great traits to have. But he will also love the fact that you are sensitive, and can sometimes get into your own head. He understands that, knows it all too well, so he will try with all his might to try and make sure that you are happy and always smiling! But he will love how fierce you can be to other people, never bowing down to their expectations!

All in all, I feel like Ace would be a great man for you in the one piece universe! He would be attentive to you, would love your attitude and personality, and would absolutely adore how loyal and strong you are! make sure to love him thoroughly!

Ah, Sai! He is much like Ace, just a little less emotional, which is fine! I feel like you and Sai would make a couple for a couple reasons! He would love how mature you are, and how logical you can be, and-- like ace-- he loves the fact that you are extremely loyal to your friends! That is a true factor in the way he will see you, and it is for the better! He will se how strong you are, emotionally and will be envious and at the same time fascinated! I Feel like Sai will look at you with wide eyes, his breath caught in his throat, his heart beating wildly in his ribcage because he will love you that much! All the things you are interested he will want to hear with enthusiasm, everything you love he will want to learn and hear from you, to get to know you better!

Another thing is that if you were to go to him with your insecurities and how you are battling depression, he will try to understand, and once he does he will try to everything and anything to make sure you feel better! You need a massage? He’s on it! You need cuddles? oh yeah he will give you some! You need chocolate or sweets or anything of the like? He’ll run to the store, and be back 5 minutes tops!

All in all, I feel like the cool, mature Sai, with a heart of pure gold will be such a good match for you! He will make sure that you uncomfortable with him, he will never want to make you unhappy, and he will definitely do anything i his power to make sure that you will keep on loving him as much as you can!

Rei! Now, with Rei, I wanted to go a more cute route. I feel that Rei would be equal parts and scared and in love with you! He sees how strong you are against people that oppose, he sees how strong you are for your friends, and how you have such a different personality to everybody else around him, and he will immediately fall in with you. Like instantly! To him, you’d be like a beautiful butterfly blooming right in front of him, and he will want to have you all tot himself! Of course, he won’t force you, but he will definitely watch you at a distance longingly!

He is very much an introvert and your calm but strong aura would definitely help with his anxiety! I just see him melting next you, into your lap or shoulder whenever you are around him because he is so comfortable around you. He doesn’t do this with just anybody so it would be a real honor! And when it it comes to your insecurities, he would want to make sure that you know he loves you the way are, and if you were to want to change something about yourself, then he will support you all the way, as long as you are happy! He will just love that you are such a freethinker and so openminded about things, so unlike him!

All in all, I feel like Rei would love you and (somewhat) idolize because you have all these traits that he would love to have. This perfectionist will understand how it feels to be such a perfectionist and will want to help you with that too! He will love to the moon and back(stroke)!

#match-ups #matchup #submissions #anime matchup #submission #naruto matchup #free! matchup #one piece matchup #naruto x you #free x you #one piece x you

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crybabytoy59 · 4 years

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The Meeting (reworking)

The meeting.

I was so aroused that day my first weekend to myself in a long time my business consuming most but all of my time. Often i wished i was not such a product of my own success. looking through all the ad’s I had found on Craig’s list that evening a warm sunny day i had left work at lunchtime giving my staff the afternoon off as i did each Friday of a “Play Weekend”.

Now sat on my favourite wee leather kneeling stool in my pink pvc maids dress, a pink cartoon fairy disposable Nappy, with two large 4000ml pads both i had cut to let my pee pass through to the next this made for a very swollen Nappy plus i could wet multiple times, over them my pink pvc popper nappy cover i loved the softness of them plus i found the smell of the soft pink rubber Very overpowering. Next my huge frilly silk pants I had custom-made they had a Huge frilly heart at the rear inside the huge frilly white layered heart was embroidered the word “crybaby” ! Around the pants layers of silk and lace stood out ward around six inches! With the nappy under them my butt looked huge, the hem of the pink maids uniform only just hid the bulky Sissy Pants my petticoat pushing the huge hemlines upwards to almost 90deg such was the fullness of the handmade garments custom-made for me by an ebay seller i had become friends with she had made all of my wardrobe.

I decided to place an ad of my own on craigslist working on a small window of who I was as a sissy Abdl/bondage play Thing....posting it my heart was racing...

I went back to my usual internet bank of clips and pictures, feeling more and more aroused i put the first Baby bottle to my lips the huge teat filling my mouth as the warm milk slid over my tongue i swallowed compressing the teat as i did made it refill starting an almost siphoning effect i gulped it down.

I was going to have the weekend to myself to play my self bondage games, taking myself further each time I played....

But this was interrupted by a ping from Craig’s list..I had a reply to my ad?...it was from a couple they had read my ad and felt very sad for me that I felt I would never get to be who lived inside of me, they also said they had followed the link to my tumblr and that my stories were very good....We need to talk “Baby”..was all they put ..a link appearing to a WhatsApp page...this I followed I typed in a simple “Hi I found your reply to my ad ...would you like to talk?” I waited but nothing came back, so I went to close it and noticed someone was typing...

A reply came ! “Clever Baby...that was your first “Little” step...Now as it’s Friday night are you playing by yourself? ( my ad told of my self play at weekends to

Fuel my Kink) I typed in “Yes” no my keyboard, almost instantly a reply came ...how long do you play Baby? I replied that I was off this weekend so I am going to play All weekend 😜....a reply came...Well you have read our ad would you like to meet for a drink and a chat?....”Eh yes please but it’s getting late?” ..Don’t fret we stay Very close to you....I was confused by this as their ad said a different area..so I typed a message back...

I think we stay in different areas? ...it’s ok Baby our ad is old we have moved..Ok you have 30mins ! are you dressed? If so put on something to cover up to go outside, if Not go and get dressed Now ! I typed back that i was already dressed for the evening.

Then we will see you in 30mins at M* ,*******y,s in the car park we will be parked under the sign...park up then come to our Car under the sign 29mins “Baby”...

That was it even though I sent an Ok ..nothing more came back, so I rushed to get one of my boiler suit’s on as the bulk was so large I could fit nothing else on!...driving there I felt very nervous also my adrenaline was pumping so hard I felt I needed the toilet but time was ticking away... so I took Breath’s through the Need to go and they passed, sitting in the car with all my padding felt strange but nice I had never driven dressed up, in fact i had never went out in public with anything more than a simple Tena nappy in plain white so if I was discovered it could be explained away with a medical excuses, but this?...this was different i was in full sissy AB attire a huge padded rear with a swollen straining “Clittie” !!

As I drove into the car park there was a 4x4 under the sign! But only one person in it?... I parked up but was hesitant due to the single occupant, so thought to myself I would simply go over and ask for directions that way if I was wrong no harm..

As I got to the car the door opened to my surprise a man got out opening the back door...as I walked up he spoke “In the back Baby”. I did as I was Told,there was a girl in the back she spoke to me....”In Baby Kneel on the floor face me...Clever Baby..Open Wide!”

The car had one of the back seats removed so there was a space on the floor with a changing mat in its place,this mat had Winnie the Pooh bear characters on it ! I felt something being put around my ankles & I panicked slightly....Blurting out ...”P,p,please are we not going for a chat?” Suddenly my mouth was pulled open from behind as the girl pushed in a rubber ball gag with a face harnessing, this was pulled Very tightly! My arms were forced behind me and locked In cuffs! I was spun around and a hood pulled over my face, next I was in the seat with a seatbelt put over me.m The door shut then the second door shut as the car started up.....she spoke to me.... “Clever Baby Sit Still just a short drive and we will be home....Then Cutie The Fun Will Begin....Baby we Are going to make Your stories seem like a soft fairytale.....tell me Cuteness are you a bit afraid at the moment ? (I nodded) Clever Baby...You Have Good reason to be Afraid....what’s this all under here Eh? you can Hardly Sit !...don’t fret Baby... we are going to make sitting Very uncomfortable for You!” They both laughed but not a funny laugh ...a Deeply wicked laughter.....That’s us here Baby let’s get you inside so we can have a better Look at You Babyslave!!”....I was taken into their home...the hood was Not removed... they put a spreader bar on my ankles then he spoke “Now Baby I want you to wet and mess yourself in a moment so kneel for us...Eh Now Babyslave!”..... (if any of you have knelt with a spreader bar on its quite difficult) ..I collapsed to My Knees, The hood was bellowing in and out over my face as I gasped, she spoke to me “Ok let me explain what is happening as You potty for us....(the hood was being unfastened as she spoke to me) My Name is Mistress M....that is Master D when we allow You to talk you will talk with a lisp like the Little You Are....a Three year old girlie Got that ?” I nodded as the hood came off...I was blinking because there was a bright light in my face I could see her but only a shadow figure, she continued “Baby we are going to have a weekend together, if after that you would like us to keep You we will take that next step... should you wish to leave your free to do so...Ok? You can answer past the gag we will understand You...” I told them Yes lisping best I could past the gag, she spoke again.......”Now The Hard Part Babyslave!....You will have No Safeword & No limits!! We will not hurt you permanently or leave you scared in any way...Only perhaps mentality ! Now Babyslave Master D is going to uncuff you, if you want to leave put your arms out in front of you, But if You fully understands what I just told You & are the person in your “stories” I Want You to put your handies behind your head keeping them there..Ok Babyslave Toy..time too choose ??”

I could now start to focus on her she was stunning! Long black hair in a ponytail she was very slim around 5’9″ tall smiling down at me...

I put my hands together behind my head interlocking My fingers.....

This was what they had hoped for they had spent hours looking over ads reading through them they had come across his ad it was very different from most as it held an Abdl content as she read over this Mistress Mandy smiled she knew of abdl but had not chosen that path in her FEM DOM career, but now older looking to retirement both her and her husband were looking towards having her Deepest Fantasy fulfilled to use a genuine submissive without bounds other than the physical limits of the human body the Mind ..well that was a different thing altogether !! Reading his ad she had become very wet....asking her husband over to look at the ad she was grinning ear to ear ! Turning to his wife he smiled are You sure ?...but he could already tell this new Toys fate was sealed, she smiled “yes darling am sure the abdl will give us a huge Humiliation element to his training, plus i kind of like that I could have him collapsing into a Babyslave’....Ok message him I lets see what happens darling was all he said.

They could not believe there luck not only was he Deeply submissive he was alone at home for the weekend already Playing !! The next bit was simple as she typed “Baby you have 30mins !” Heading in the car too there home she was throbbing with want a Deep Want of Dominance her way, a wish about to be fulfilled, they parked up...five mins latter a silver Bmw drove into the car park facing them as he stepped out she turned smiling “That him look at the shape”...he got out opening the door....

Her thoughts returned to her she spoke to him “Clever Babyslave Ok lets begin Get her up on her feet Master D”. I was pulled upright! She unzipped the suit as Master D pulled it down I felt a tug at the side then a ripping sound then a second tug followed by a second ripping sound as the hook on the blade cut through the black overalls....

I now stood before them in my pink maids uniform with the huge Nappy on, Master D lifted the dress at the sides then spoke “My my Mistress M look at this Sissy is already dressed to go to work for us!...” Mistress M spoke “Yes indeed Master D...But She has her very first task to do ..Don’t You Crybaby! Do it Now!....push Hard I want to see that Crybaby Face go red with Effort!,”

They both came around to watch the spectacle as I went Potty’Pants in front of them both ! I felt so Very ashamed but strangely I found I was Very turned on at the same time...she spoke to me “Clever girlie Crybaby is that it all out? ...then turn the fuck around so we can get a good look at your poopies” as I turned in the spreader bar I couldn’t believe my eyes I was in a dungeon!! It had every bondage Toy around whips,paddles,leather straps,hoods, cases with strange-looking equipment in them....

She patted my rear lightly Sit Down!” As I bent I could feel the mess spreading up my back. Suddenly my hips was held and I was slowly lowered on to something? It was a knee ? Mistress M came around in front of me then bent forwards “Bounce on Master Daddy’s Knee Crybaby! ....this was something I knew about them from there page..they were both heavily into Humiliation !! As I bounced I felt a smack to My rear! Then Master Daddy Spoke taking my hips “No Crybaby like this !” He forced me up & down getting more & more forceful as he did, Mistress M spoke “Clever girlie Crybaby that’s better isn’t it!..yes ? (They both giggled as I listed out a Wess) Louder Crybaby! Say it !..Clever girlie you bounce for Master Daddy as I get your first punishment set up....its time to see You Crying....

She wheeled over a large box it was black the top had a hole around 8” Mistress M opened the top, inside was what looked like a saddle with a back to it, this had straps on it.

She loved this box a friend had given her the saddle and another carpenter friend had built the box, inside the black leather saddle was mounted on a leather-covered platform 2ft high this was oval so the Slave in the saddle had to both bend their knees wide but angled under them once in the leather ankle cuffs, the back had a padded angular back rest with a built-in arm binder that laced up the rear once the slates hands were made immobile by the ball mittens, above this the lid had a round leather covered top a hole at its centre that was in two half’s so the slaves head would be the only thing seen once closed up tight. It’s Was truly a wicked bit of BDSM furniture !!

Master Daddy was still Bouncing me at this point he then stopped, I still had my hands behind my head as I was genuinely afraid to move them ! Master Daddy then lifted me up the mess was spread everywhere I could now smell it, he pushed me forward towards the box he spoke to his wife “ Let’s hurry up as stinky butt here needs to appreciate The Gift we let her have Mistress Mummy” He then took the spreader bar off as she stood in front of me....

Mistress M spoke “Ok into the box for us Crybaby leggies Down the side of the saddle for Mistress Mummy..Clever girlie Crybaby arms down the back so Master Daddy can strap You into your armbinder” my arms were slowly being pulled together tighter and tighter, i started whimpering as my chest was forced forwards the more my arms tightened my shoulders became taut pulled relentlessly back, the last two straps crossed over my chest down over my shoulders to the waiting buckles these he wrenched upwards ! as I jerked due to the force he spoke “Clever girlie Crybaby..lets close this up” patting my head He positioned the top rear part then spoke “headie all the way back....Clever Crybaby Hold Still for us “Master Daddy pushed closed the front part then locked the two half’s together now only my head was out the box, Mistress Mummy had a rubber hood this one went on tightly it covered my head but left my face open framed by black rubber, Master Daddy had what looked like a large helmet in two half’s with buckles all over it to join the two half’s together, at the mouth it had a short oval tube, Mistress Mummy spoke to me “Open Wide Crybaby! “ as I did the tube was forced into my mouth i had to open really wide to accept it...I whimpered as he pushed it on Very hard pulling the two half’s together the oval passed behind my teeth holding my mouth open, he strapped it on tightly! I heard pumping as the inside of the helmet Got tighter!.. It was inflatable !!

Master Daddy put a tube from the back of the box to the helmet at the rear, then patted my head walking off, Mistress Mummy squatted down at my side as she spoke “Ok Crybaby Master Daddy and I have to get something set up for you so sit here till we’re Ready for you Crybaby, as there was not much time to prepare Your punishment equipment for this evening...So as you Sit here contemplating what we’re going to do to You Crybaby here is a wee taster so too speak’ she giggled as Master Daddy came over with a red funnel this had a tube from it around six inches long, handing it to Mistress Mummy she started pushing it in my nostril hole! Next Master Daddy did something to the box and it tilted backwards! As she held the funnel he lifted A condom full of a huge load ! Without warning he poured it into the funnel! I could feel it go down the back of my throat, it was still warm! I started to tear up as I knew this pair meant every word of their Dominance over me...with her other hand Mistress Mummy pushed a cock gag into my mouth making me hold it! As she strapped it behind my head.

“Clever Baby hold that until we get back did you like Mummy & Daddy’s Gift ...Yes Cutie it was from us both You made us so het we had to Make love..But we didn’t want our Baby to miss out so Mistress Mummy squatted Over the wee funnel as she climaxed Master Daddy’s Gift Out to mix with hers...Clever girlie... Crybaby cock sucker!”

She removed the tube from my nose then pulled mask over my nose and mouth that clipped to the helmet via holes in its sides..I Suddenly heard a sound like the hollow tubes as a kid we would spin around our heads to make different sounds..but this tube echoed to my Breaths as I slowly started to smell my rear only much stronger !!!

Mistress loved this bit of the Box as it had a built in fan that made the slave have to endure whatever they decided to put in the box, she had put many things into the Box at her clients ask, But this time ? This was her choice her devious plan to slowly reprogram his mind to her will..Her wants and needs...

They seemed to have been away for ages, with me sat in the box kneeling over the saddle smelling my own mess!..I tested the bonds but it made the smell stronger as I moved spreading my mess even further around my now soaking wet nappy !! when the door opened Mistress Mummy was first to walk in she had changed into a black rubber skirt and white rubber top it was sleeveless she had on black rubber tights and hold ups...She strode over without a word then picked up an item a strange two foot long tube, it had a shaft from it with a handle the inner and outer shaft were threaded at the base of the inner it looked like an oval leather pad...Mistress went behind me screwed it to the back of the box....as Master Daddy came in he had on a black rubber shirt and rubber pants on the front of these was a pouch...He stood in front of me then spoke “Now Crybaby we have everything set up for You so now let’s give You a look at what Is ahead” ..then Mistress Mummy Spoke “Right Crybaby look back at me..Clever girlie Crybaby Keep looking at Me!!” Suddenly I felt something in my back pushing me forward into more of an arch....”Clever girlie Crybaby Keep looking at Me !” It started to hurt being bent in an arch the more I arched the less movement I had till I could simply Not move! I started crying...

“Awww Clever girlie Crybaby...tears already look Master Daddy real tears, seems Crybaby has very low limits poor thing”...Master Daddy just chuckled as he took the pouch off his shorts, Mistress Mummy removed the harness then the gag. In front of me he was already swollen, straddling the box pushing into the mouth hole..”Right Crybaby lets give You a good skull Fucking...then we can take you to get cleaned up for your Obedience Training!”....he started slowly entering my mouth!!....mistress mummy held my head looking down at me as I gagged for air as I was throat fucked by this man i had only just met !!

“Clever girlie Crybaby work Master Daddy’s Dummy nice and you get air ! if not ? No Air cuteness...that’s a girlie!” Master Daddy withdrew as I gasped for air, he spoke “Clever girlie Crybaby just like that suck with your cute Baby tongue under Master Daddy’s Dummy....Clever girlie Crybaby here we go Deeper this time though cuteness ! Hold her nice and tightly Mistress Mummy, she needs to learn To sallow !”....Mistress mummy forced me on his shaft as I wrenched I felt him swelling then the first spasm! Mistress mummy barked at me “Don’t You Dare pass out Crybaby!! Swallow! ..Do it every last drop of Master Daddy’s gift!”

Fuck this was all she had hoped for he was a true submissive as they worked there trade he had simply collapsed tears streaming from him at the realisation they were Very much in control a control they would use to train him to total submission a compliment Babyslave that they and there friends would use...Yes she would take her time show her DOMINANT friends just how she could mould a SLAVE....

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aeipcthys · 4 years

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╰ ❛ 💉 — › brenda song. cis-female. she/her. ╯ have you met margot moore yet ? this twenty nine year old virgo has been living in the seattle area for one month. she makes a living as executive assistant to the chief of surgery, which is best suited for their observant, loyal, picky, and judgmental personality. hold on by wilson phillips is one of their favorite songs.

trigger warnings: mental health, mental illness, bipolar disorder, racism, microaggressions, gambling addiction mention, addiction mention

full character page here

BASIC INFORMATION

Full Name: margot moore

Nickname(s): moore

Age: 29

Date of Birth: august 23, 1992

Hometown: lake placid, florida

Current Location: seattle, washington

Ethnicity: hmong, thai

Nationality: american

Gender: cisgender female

Pronouns: she/her/hers

Orientation: she has only ever slept with men. that being said.......how y’all doing

Status: technically in a relationship

Religion: christian

Political Affiliation: democratic socialist

Occupation: executive assistant to the chief of surgery

Living Arrangements: she wants a roommate so if someone breaks into her apartment she won’t be the only target

Language(s) Spoken: english, hmong

Accent: american

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Face Claim: brenda song

Hair Color: brunette

Eye Color: dark brown

Height: 5'2

Weight: 113 lbs

Build: slim

Tattoos: anchor, writing on her finger, cross on her knuckle, writing on her wrist, bee on her wrist, cross on her side, symbol on her wrist

Piercings: ears, cartilage

Clothing Style: cute, fashionable kind of thing

Usual Expression: resting bitch face probably

Distinguishing Characteristics: laugh

HEALTH

Physical Ailments: none.

Neurological Conditions: has a form of bipolar affective disorder, doesn’t talk about it much, and is strict about her medications

Allergies: none.

Sleeping Habits: sprawls out across her bed when she eventually passes out with the tv on

Eating Habits: vegetarian except when she’s not

Exercise Habits: she actually attends those soul cycle kind of classes, and is really into it, but she would definitely make fun of them to everyone else

Emotional Stability: 9.14

Sociability: chatty, definitely can be nice, often judgmental but with good intentions, will gossip with you

Body Temperature: runs cold yet often wears outfits she’ll definitely be cold in

Addictions: stupid dumb men

Drug Use: we’re not necessarily opposed, but not a regular thing

Alcohol Use: bottle of wine everyday when she gets home kinda thing

PERSONALITY

Label: tbd

Positive Traits: observant, loyal, analytical, hard-working,

Negative Traits: picky, judgmental (with love), cynical, bossy

Fears: people in mascot costumes

Hobbies: being tupperware for other people’s messes (i stole this from an astrology site but legit her okay), girl can internet stalk the HELL out of someone for you if need be

Habits: eavesdropping on conversations, accidentally cutting people off when she has a better idea, zoning out when a whole lot of boring is coming at her

FAVOURITES

Weather: if it’s not humidity, she’s cool

Colour: shades of peach

Music: anything she can dance to in her apartment or every once and a while something at her desk that would make lachlan uncomfortable

Movies: no movies, movies are long

Sport: uh

Beverage: wine

Food: too many things have been described as her favorite to keep track

Animal: no thanks

FAMILY

Father: cye moore

Mother: mai moore

Sibling(s): elias moore

Children: none.

Pet(s): n/a

Family’s Financial Status: middle class

EXTRA

Zodiac Sign: virgo

MBTI: estj

Anything Else:

BIO

Margot Moore grew up in Lake Placid, Florida...a very tiny place in the sunshine state. Lake Placid had a population of just about 2,000 people, and Margot felt the smallness of it all ever since she was young.

Her parents, Cye and Mai, were good and loving parents to Margot and her brother, Elias. Both her parents were immigrants to the United States, so they were among the many who worked tirelessly to provide a good and stable life for their children. Her father worked his way up to being a branch manager at a manufacturing company, and her mother worked at a bank. All in all, her life could be described as pretty normal.

However, growing up in Lake Placid wasn’t always a walk in the park. Lake Placid was a largely white town, and because it was small, everybody knew everybody. Which meant people talked. You never wanted to be on the wrong side of that talk. As she got older, Margot started to see that she looked different from a lot of her classmates. Her classmates noticed it too.

TW racism, microaggressions She began to experience racism and microaggressions at the hands of people who were her friends. A lot of it was unconscious, but there was a definite bias. Margot’s parents knew it too, but they didn’t want to rock the boat. They encouraged Margot to ignore it. To try and blend in as much as possible. So, that’s what Margot learned to do. She tried her best to just blend in with it all. She didn’t talk much about her family’s culture or traditions. She tried to make herself look more like her friends, even dying her hair blonde for a period of time to try and make herself into the ideal standard of beauty.

TW mental illness, mental health, bipolar disorder During this time, Margot also began to struggle with other things. Her mood swings were unpredictable. She experienced racing thoughts and an inability to focus. She started sleeping less and making some risky decisions. At first, Margot didn’t want to get help. She didn’t see a need. But when she started to fall back into a depressive episode during her junior year of high school, her parents said enough was enough. Margot started going to regular therapy appointments and met with a number of psychologists. She was diagnosed with a milder form of bipolar affective disorder, and she has been on medications ever since.

Margot has done extremely well keeping up with therapy and her medications. Therapy is the one thing she’ll never reschedule. Not even for work. Old habits die hard for Margot, though. It’s hard for her to talk about her mental illness because in her mind, this is just another thing that separates her from everyone else. And remember what her parents always said: assimilate.

Margot went on to college, and she had a strong desire to get herself out of Lake Placid. She decided to study business at the advise of her dad at the University of Central Florida, but it wasn’t something she was exactly passionate about. It was a thing to do while she enjoyed her college years. She wasn’t bad at it, she just didn’t give as much effort as she probably should have.

Out of college, Margot had little money of her own, but she was determined not to go back to Lake Placid to live with her parents. She started temping at an agency, and she would get moved around from business to business, mostly doing administrative work or bookkeeping. It wasn’t overly exciting, but it gave her some money to live off. Plus, Margot lived off of learning about each place she worked at...all of the office gossip and drama.

Somewhere in her post-grad life, Margot met Holden. Holden was, in fact, an idiot who probably had a (TW gambling addiction, addiction) gambling problem that Margot funds. Margot and Holden just kind of ended up together. It wasn’t that they were madly in love. They just kind of...stuck. Margot was the one who pretty much kept them alive. She for some reason has a soft spot for the dumb ones...it was the only thing that kept her from kicking him to the curb through the years. Their relationship isn’t solid, or even necessarily exclusive...it just kind of exists. And no one understands it.

When she was about 24 years old, Margot started temping at a private practice in Florida. This is where she soon met Lachlan Covington and Andrea Martinez. Both the doctors worked at the private practice, and Margot started actually liking her job. Of course, it was a temp job, so she had to work her magic. Sure enough, she was eventually able to persuade Lachlan into taking her on as an assistant.

Margot has been working for Lachlan ever since, and she’s built up a good friendship with Andrea. She was shocked when Andrea left for Seattle, and high key disappointed to see the couple split up. She always hoped they would be endgame. Margot stuck by Lachlan, but she often told him that he needed to get Andrea back. Because he did. Eventually, Margot watched Lachlan leave too. She initially had no intention of going with him, considering her life was all in Florida. However, after a few weeks him being gone, she realized how boring most of her other co-workers were. When he reached out to see if she’d come to Seattle, she said yes almost immediately. (She tried to be casual about it though). She assigned herself the title of executive assistant, just because she thought it sounded more important with the word executive in it.

Margot didn’t exactly break up with Holden before she left, and by the sounds of his texts, he may still think they’re still together. She’s just kind of letting that be for the time being. After all, they’ve been together for so long.

Margot is liking Seattle, but she hates living alone and is still trying to get her own lay of the land. She likes to have resources...people she can go to when she needs something, people she can squeeze information out of, the good restaurants she can order from and charge to the hospital credit card when Lachlan’s inevitably working late and she stays in solidarity...that kind of thing.

PLOTS

y’all know me open to anything

probably looking for: roommate!!! folks she always goes to for info, people to gossip with, a friend she often grabs lunch with, that one doctor she hates and always tells them that lachlan is in a meeting when really he’s completely free

#traumaintro #she was not meant to stand still ( margot moore. )#sup #( character intro. )

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yoyoblogss · 4 years

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personal experiences

Hi guys, it’s me again Yoanna, coming back to overshare my personal life experiences on the internet. In this blog, we’re going to be speaking about the sexualization of POC, specifically POC women, as well as stereotypes we beautiful people face daily and how they correlate with one another. I’ll be mentioning a few articles and a video to talk about these topics. Using these sources, I’ll be answering a question I came across a few days ago, which four of the many voices we encountered in this class speaks to you? How and Why? Let's start with sexualization, sexualization is making someone feel like a sexual object making something sexual. Every day we are being sexualized by the media and capitalized off of it. It’s how the world works, it’s how the media is always money hungry and will sexualize anyone to increase their dollars in their bank account and will shapeshift how people view one another. One day, we love skinny girls, and one day we love big girls specifically with a tiny chub. One day we like men with a dad bod and one day we like men with hard rock abs. Every day, the media makes it hard for us to love ourselves. So let me start with the JLO video, it's one of her many popular songs called Waiting for Tonight. During an assignment I had to do for class, we talked about exoticness, fetishization, and how sexualized this video was. The director himself put jungles in the background to show how exotic JLO is and the women of color in this video. He stuck to the stereotypes of POC women and said yes! Put a jungle in the background and women from different countries with unique features to show how exotic they are! This music video is confined to the day to day stereotypes of POC by including beautiful women from different backgrounds and showing that they’re comfortable in their skin but some might not understand, the way I interpreted the music video, especially the ending was the sexualization of JLO in the water dancing. The director knew that if he showed this part of the video, it would attract more audience because it’s a beautiful Latina in the water even though it was just JLO simply dancing to her music, the outside world would interpret it as the director did. Every time a woman steps out in her clothes or posts a bikini photo confident within herself, others would always degrade them or oversexualize them for no reason. When a woman shows a bit of skin, she’s immediately called the worst names and looked upon differently which SHOULDN'T even be a thing. In our day in age with the upcoming app Tiktok, when anyone posts a video themselves showing a bit of skin, the comments flood with “I’m looking respectfully” which is an odd saying to me because what is the point of saying that? Some people even dare to say “I’m looking disrespectfully”, which is so weird to me and odd because it’s a form of degradation and basically initiating that it’s okay and normal to sexualize them, if I'm looking “respectfully” or “disrespectfully”. Trust me, whenever I post a TikTok with some sort of revealing clothes, people run to the comments and say the same thing to me. I don’t like it, I don't like how normalized it is to do this, it makes me very uncomfortable and I want to hide forever from the internet. In Aparicio, Maria Conchita Alonso described how confined she was to the stereotypes that were made because of her “exotic background”. She talks about how she’s always seen as an object and “half out of her mind”, which in other words, crazy, which is exactly what these stereotypes describe her as. The second you search up “exotic women”, on google and look through their images, all you see is POC women with the caption, “beautiful sexy exotic women” basically listing them as objects for people to stare at and imagine the unimaginable. POC women always struggle with these stereotypes and being seen as “foreign” objects. I feel like what Alonso was saying completely describes how I feel. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been oversexualized and experienced what it’s like to feel like an object. In middle school, I developed earlier than the kids in my grade, guys would make comments about my ass and boobs, slap my ass and boob, and I didn’t understand what everything meant until I started growing older and more knowledgeable. It was wrong but I was too naive. As I started getting older and appreciating the body I was given, full of self-love, I would wear clothes that would accentuate my body and it felt good. I felt beautiful and sexy for myself, no one else. In high school, guys would also make comments about me, calling me sexy, saying sexual things to me at all times, and would talk about having intercourse with me behind my back and to my face. One time a guy looked at me in the face and said, “Suck me.” I was in shock that someone I saw as a friend, nothing more, would say that to me in a public setting, literally in the middle of my English class. It made me feel like an object and sexualized. When I used to be on dating apps, men's sadly first pickup line was, “I’ve never seen anyone so exotic”. Getting called exotic made me feel like I was a special drink they made at resorts that are far out of my budget. It was a weird feeling and something I hope to never feel again. Whenever I would speak Arabic in public, I would have everyone's jaw especially the whites to the ground and them continuously asking me to say something else, teach them a word, or talk about how different it is. During my course, we also stumbled upon identity and how it talks about how they're restricted to these stereotypes placed upon them. In “A Conversation with Latinos on Race”, talks about how they had to change their traditions and who they are to become more accepted in America. Gregory, one of the people in the video talking about his experience, spoke about how he was automatically labeled as an African American because of his skin and voice, which he isn’t. This spoke to me because coming from an immigrant family as a first-generation, it was hard learning American traditions and becoming more socially accepted so I as well felt like I needed to change. My family predominantly speaks Arabic in the house, so it was already a struggle to learn how to speak English. I dressed differently, ate differently, and acted differently in school. I barely ate any traditional food at home anymore when I was a kid because I forced my mom to make American food. No one ever identified me as an Egyptian. Some would assume I was Latina and would automatically speak to me in Spanish which led to me awkwardly cutting them off and saying “I don’t speak Spanish” and walk away. Some would assume I was Indian, but never where I’m actually from until they hear me speak Arabic. In “Light in the Dark”, by Gloria Anzaldua, she mentions how there are always certain expectations on people's race and we can’t control how people perceive us in America. Coming from an Egyptian who’s from Queens, Astoria, predominantly full of people who speak Arabic or different dialects of Arabic, there are many assumptions about them. The assumptions would be that specifically, your father was a cab driver, owns a hookah lounge, has a halal cart, or a deli worker. In school, I would hear kids making fun of Arab kids in my class about how their dad is a cab driver and barely makes money. For some time, I didn’t like admitting that my dad was a cab driver or worked in a deli. Listening to kids being made fun of for their parent's occupations made me scared to be in that same situation. It would take me a really long time to admit that my dad was a cab driver, it felt like my mouth just couldn’t even open and utter the words. I should’ve never felt embarrassed to admit that he was a cab driver or a deli worker because my dad is a very hard worker and did what he can for us to survive but that’s what assumptions do to people. You can’t control how people perceive you. All of these articles plus the video touched me and made me rethink my past experiences. I hope you guys enjoyed this analysis of my experiences and hope it made people with similar experiences like mine feel less alone in this cruel world. Remember, self-love is the best love.

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fangirlfromdownunder · 5 years

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Free! Match-Up Request

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 24

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2)

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body.

Hair Color/Style: Black and naturally curly but I keep it relaxed and flat-ironed so it’s straight. It’s long and goes down to just below my shoulder blades.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Hobbies/Interests: Video games, reading, writing, anime, internet surfing, listening to music, politics (sometimes), watching movies/TV shows, basically being an overall nerd

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

I have issues with trust and a wild imagination to boot. I usually trust my instincts and can see right through bullshit. I don’t like taking risks and I have to know all the details when I do something so I don’t mess up and look like an idiot. I am indeed a perfectionist to a fault which often prevents me from trying new things and going outside my comfort zone. I haven’t been in a relationship yet and am still a virgin due to my issues with trust and not wanting to be hurt or humiliated as well as being picky/perfectionistic with the people I allow in my life. I have high standards for both people and myself although I’m pretty laid-back and my dislike of conflict allows me to also take a lot of shit from people too before I eventually say “fuck it” and slam the door on them. I don’t think very highly of myself and can sometimes fall into a period of self-hatred.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well. These things are pretty annoying for me to deal with whenever they flare up.

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

***

Okay! Lot of info but let’s see here. I think out of all the guys, Rin matches you the best. He’s a bit of a hothead but super supportive at the end of the day.

Headcanons:

He might not call you short but he will use you as an arm rest.

He might also steal your glasses just to mess with you. It’s all in fun, if you asked he’d give them back but holding them out of reach is just too much fun for him

He’s smarter than he lets on. Sure he’s no genius but he can hold a conversation well and knows what he’s passionate about. So a good conversation is a fine way to spend the time

He’s incredibly supportive of every dream you have and will cheer you on from right beside you. Or from the sidelines, if he can’t be by your side

His love language is also the same as yours, making you an excellent match

#match up #free #free! iwatobi swim club #rin #rin matsuoka #long post #lots of infor #tw:#mention of:#suicide #suicidal thoughts #depression #submission

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misc-headcanons · 5 years

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Bleach and One Piece Match-Up Request

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 24

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2)

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body.

Hair Color/Style: Black and naturally curly but I keep it relaxed and flat-ironed so it’s straight. It’s long and goes down to just below my shoulder blades.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Hobbies/Interests: Video games, reading, writing, anime, internet surfing, listening to music, politics (sometimes), watching movies/TV shows, basically being an overall nerd

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

I have issues with trust and a wild imagination to boot. I usually trust my instincts and can see right through bullshit. I don’t like taking risks and I have to know all the details when I do something so I don’t mess up and look like an idiot. I am indeed a perfectionist to a fault which often prevents me from trying new things and going outside my comfort zone. I haven’t been in a relationship yet and am still a virgin due to my issues with trust and not wanting to be hurt or humiliated as well as being picky/perfectionistic with the people I allow in my life. I have high standards for both people and myself although I’m pretty laid-back and my dislike of conflict allows me to also take a lot of shit from people too before I eventually say “fuck it” and slam the door on them. I don’t think very highly of myself and can sometimes fall into a period of self-hatred.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well. These things are pretty annoying and humiliating for me to deal with whenever they pop up.

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

(I’m happy you gave me so much info to work with!)

Nothing says punk or goth like skulls, right? I played around with some other accessories like a choker necklace and some earrings, but since you mentioned you don’t like feminine clothing I just went with the good ol’ leather jacket)

For Bleach, I match you with....Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez!

You mentioned you were a Pisces, and I like to take zodiacs/birthdays into account when they’re provided in matchups. Grimmjow’s a Leo, and from what I read, Leos and Pisces bring out a lot of great qualities within each other; the more I thought about it, the more I think that holds true. Like Grimmjow, you aren’t ever afraid to speak your mind, you’re both ambitious (I think Grimmjow would be a Slytherin too!) and are both rebels in your own right. The both of you also prefer to let your actions do the talking, and I think he would appreciate a partner who he can trust to speak their mind and not hide anything they’re feeling just to be nice. I think that Grimmjow would be able to help you be more assertive and less passive-aggressive, which you mentioned in your submission, and you would be able to get him to calm down and think things through before flying off the handle and beating the shit out of whoever or whatever is pissing him off.

You mentioned that you were slowly starting to embrace nihilism and misanthropy (and I feel that Grimmjow post-defeat by Nnoitora would share similar thoughts about his life’s meaning at the time. Dude just got his shit wrecked and his dreams of being the strongest/the King just got shot down by Nnoitora’s sword slicing him through the chest), but I think your optimism would not only balance out your perspective on life, but his as well. To “fix” your partner’s views/negative outlook on life shouldn’t be up to you (he’s his own person, and asking that much emotional labor of someone would be inappropriate, even if he does love you), but I think whenever you talk about your life philosophy, he’d slowly start to realize that you can find a balance between “nothing fucking matters, why bother” and “nothing fucking matters, so why not?”

Leo men are somewhat protective of their partners, so Grimmjow is always there if you’re in need of emotional or physical help. Fatigue from your anemia? He’ll straight up carry you where you need to go if he has to. Is your depression causing you to go into a downswing? He’ll keep an eye on you and do whatever it takes to lessen the weight on your shoulders/mind. Sometimes he’ll do things too comfort you without considering how you’d react (you mentioned that things get annoying and humiliating whenever your symptoms flare up like this, so having Grimmjow do something like picking you up and carry would...not be great, to say the least), but if you tell him why doing things like that upsets you he’ll try to stop and consider your feelings the next time something like that happens again. There’ll be a few instances like that where he’ll say or do something without considering how you’d react, because he’s used to being an egocentric guy (being a creature like an Arrancar, where you can only survive if you look out for yourself and ONLY yourself, makes this a difficult thing for him to change. But for you, he’ll try). This would be the main issue in your relationship, but as time goes on he’s more and more considerate of you the longer he’s with you. He has given you a cake with the (poorly) handwritten icing message “Sorry I was an asshole” more than once.

In conclusion, I think that you two would be a great example of two people who seem like total opposites finding common ground/traits/strengths/weaknesses and really complementing each other in a relationship.

For One Piece, I match you with...Zoro!

So, let’s start with zodiac compatibility. Zoro is a Scorpio, which is one of the better matches for Pisces according to what I looked up. Scorpio men and Pisces women share a lot of emotional depth, and that sort of conflicting nature/personality you have is something that Zoro can relate to. Like you, Zoro also tends to let his actions speak louder than words (especially since he isn’t the most talkative guy). A relationship with him would involve a lot of small kind gestures that let you know he cares about you. Even though he’s not one to talk a lot, he listens to anything you have to say and is a great person to vent to.

He may not be as well versed in intellectual subjects as you (social justice, politics, religion, etc.) but he keeps track of what you have to say about a particular topic. Sometimes he worries that his lack of response makes you think he’s not interested in what you’re talking about, but in reality he’s paying attention to every word; every time you talk about something he doesn’t know, he writes it down so he can either ask Robin about it or read about it himself. He doesn’t try to become an expert or anything, but he learns enough to try and form his own thoughts based on what you’ve said and what he’s looked up. His responses aren’t super eloquent, but he’s able to put things together (Normally if you asked him about the World Government he’d describe it as just “bad…” but once he learns about concepts like totalitarianism from you, he can talk about it in more depth).

Like you, Zoro is incredibly blunt and he appreciates having a partner who also speaks their mind regardless of who they’re talking to. Unlike you, he’s not as imaginative and scatterbrained, but I think this would be a case of opposites complementing each other; he likes how creative you are, and sometimes when he’s making a decision he wonders what you’d do. Like Grimmjow, Zoro would absolutely help you with asserting yourself but unlike Grimmjow he’s more considerate of how you’d react to what he does; he’s respectful of your boundaries, and if he sees that you just need to walk away from whoever’s pissing you off he doesn’t force you to confront them. He’s considerate, in his own Zoro-ish way; like he’ll quietly ask you if you want him to kick someone’s ass if you weren’t wanting to argue with them/escalate things further.

Zoro struggles with some aspects of his mental health, and that includes depression. Once you two have been together for a while, he can tell when you’re starting to enter a downswing/darker period. He doesn’t want to embarrass you by constantly smothering you/asking if you need anything, and he reassures you that there’s no shame in asking for help if you need it. Like you, he’s also not fond of expressing how he’s feeling, but he doesn’t want you to feel alone if you’re suffering.

#matchup #one piece matchup #bleach matchup #one piece #bleach #grimmjow #grimmjow jaegerjaquez #zoro #roronoa zoro #mine #submission

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dazzlinghaze528-blog · 5 years

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Lovin’ Lover: A Taylor Swift superfan’s review of Lover

Lover moved me so that I had to write a review of it. Figured it belonged on here just as much as it did on my personal blog. I hope it speaks to some fellow Swifties and maybe even someday Taylor herself.

I’ve identified as a Taylor Swift super fan for an appropriate 13 years now. I specifically recall being in the seventh grade, checking my hot pink iPod Nano at 11:00 PM sharp to listen to the launch of Fearless single “You Belong With Me”- the first of many times I would come to dance this dance.

As much as I know she has meant to so many of the young women who have grown up with her, I have to admit I still sometimes feel as though there is something special about the bond we share as artist and fan. Something almost cosmic or spiritual. There are so many similar, specific ways that we both seem to interact with the world. Something in the way that melodies and words and storytelling keep us moving forward. Something in the way we analyze the complexities of the lives we’ve found ourselves in and the way that can feed anxiety if we’re not carefully waiting for it. Something in the bubbly personalities, the love of cats and vintage fashion. Something in the golden hair and indigo eyes.

Something in the way that we LOVE love.

This album is arguably Taylor Swift’s most mature, personal analysis of love of any of her albums thus far. It’s not just snakes transforming into butterflies and paper rings and golden hours. It’s an inside look at the rainbow spectrum of ways that love can manifest itself in real lives, not just in storybooks. And that moved me to the point where I had to (literally) take a note out of Taylor’s book and write about it. So here we go:

“I Forgot That You Existed”

Taylor has described this opener as the track that transitions the listener out of her previous Reputation era. It’s sonically very bright and buoyant, with perhaps the melody that most easily rolls of the voice. And it settles in the emotion that most are striving for when recovering from drama or a betrayal: indifference. Some will call this song ‘petty,’ but I challenge all who listen to think back to the first time they thought about someone who wronged them after months, or maybe even years of occupancy in their minds and thought, “Oh- I forgot about them.” Is there any stronger sense of relief?

“Cruel Summer”

Littered with sharp imagery and cutting lyrics, this is (in my opinion) the album’s most epic track. I don’t have a particularly eloquent way of explaining this, but the production sounds like neon- ala the intro music to HBO’s Sharp Objects. And the story is one that 20-somethings know, excuse the joke, all too well. This story is one of a summer fling that you find yourself wanting to grow up into something real, and the very real fear that you could get cut when you let the other person know. When TS said, “I’m drunk in the back of the car, and I cried like a baby coming home from the bar. Said I’m fine but it wasn’t true; I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you,” …I felt that.

“Lover”

I can’t say enough glowing things about this song. It’s a waltz that sounds straight out of the 60s and uses some of my all time favorite words. Words that sound straight out of a Jane Austen novel. Between “there’s a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear” and “my heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue; all’s well that ends well to end up with you,” wedding related Instagram captions are set for the next couple of years. As beautiful as this song is, I admit that it really is a song meant for lovers. You love it more when you are in love yourself.

“The Man”

I’ve yet to hear a song quite like this yet, which is surprising given the time that we’re living in. It’s even more striking coming from Taylor Swift, a woman who was named this past year’s highest paid celebrity. Period. It’s a fascinating observation that many of the things that Taylor Swift has been attacked for over the years: dating a handful of high-profile men, being outspoken about musicians’ financial and artistic rights, engaging with and strategically planning for a wildly intense and devoted fanbase, are lauded when done by men in the industry. Additionally, NO ONE seems to want to write about how incredibly wealthy TS is. As though it will make the reader uncomfortable. But journalists have no problem writing about the wealth and affluence of male celebrities. Food for thought; this song should be required listening.

“The Archer”

“The Archer” is a song that I truly listened to death upon its early release. I was particularly struck by the line, “And all of my heroes died all alone. Help me hold on to you.” As bizarre a connection this may be, it reminded me of one of my new favorite shows The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and the way the heroine wrestles with wether or not greatness in her art equates to a life lived alone, as she begins to achieve success with her stand-up comedy career. This isn’t all the song is about- it’s truly a very wide range of introspection, but it is what stuck with me the most as a creative who also dreams of one day falling in love and having a family.

“I Think He Knows”

Okay- this song truly fits the modern day definition of a BOP. This is probably the song on the album that most frequently gets stuck in my head upon listening.“Wanna see what’s under that attitude,” is a totally swoon worthy line. There’s also a bridge that reminds me of “Treacherous,” one of my favorite songs off of her album Red. With that song we start with “Nothing safe is worth the drive, and I will follow you, follow you home,” and end up at “Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh we can follow the sparks, I’ll drive.” in Lover. I’ve said it once but I’ll say it again, “Treacherous” ran so “I Think He Knows” could SPRINT!

7. “Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince”

I truly have so many thoughts about this song. I would argue this is the album’s smartest song, as it likens America’s current political climate to the world of an American high school- with popularity contests, school spirit chants, and clique mentality. The first time I listened to it I went, “…is this about Hilary Clinton? No…wait?” Lines like “I’m feeling helpless, the damsels are depressed. Boys will be boys then, where are the wise men?” and “They whisper in the hallway she’s a bad, bad girl. The whole school is rolling fake dice. You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes,” were screaming 2016 election to me. The song really encapsulates the moment you realize that American politics is filled with people who manipulate the system- and how that can lead to the conclusion that the prize isn’t real either.

“Paper Rings”

“Paper Rings” has grown on me since my first listen. It’s got a slight British pop-punk vibe that I wasn’t sure I was that into at first. But the more I listened, the more I fell for all of the specific, tiny details of the love that she’s found for herself. The line, “Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet. Now I’ve read all of the books beside your bed,” held so much weight to me as an amateur Internet sleuth and a lover of the written word. I found myself going “Woah- look how far they’ve COME!” It’s also just plain fun and will be awesome to see live.

“Cornelia Street”

It’s pretty incredible to know that Taylor Swift wrote this massive, sweeping song all by her lonesome. But it’s just a reminder that underneath all of the awesome production on this album, there’s just truly great songwriting. This track really leans on the idea that memories can become attached to places, impossible to separate. Ala her Red era masterpiece, “All Too Well,” TS so vividly paints a picture of the memories made on Cornelia Street that once she says “I’d never walk Cornelia Street again,” you immediately understand why.

“Death By A Thousand Cuts”

There’s a pretty amazing story behind this track. Long story short, Taylor was inspired by an incredible (and completely underrated) Netflix Rom-Com called Someone Great to write this song. But BEFORE that, a film-maker named Jennifer Kaytin Robinson was inspired to write Someone Great after soothing a heartache with Taylor’s album 1989– specifically the iconic song, “Clean.” So this tune already carries the legacy of art made by powerful women. Additionally, I find that it has some of the most tragically relatable lyrics. “My heart, my hips, my body, my love. Tryna’ find a part of me that you didn’t touch,” and “Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand. Paper cut stains from our paper thin plans,” so well articulate the paper-cut pain of the dissolution of a once cherished relationship.

“London Boy”

“London Boy” is by far the cheekiest song on the album. It’s clever as all get out, and a welcome buffer between tracks 10 and 12. An interesting observation by country singer-songwriter, Ryan Hurd: “Feels like it’s written like a country song, but it’s all dressed up like a pop song. Super cool.” As a massive country music fan, I can attest to this. “London Boy” has a crystal clear story, extremely bright lyrics, and it spends most of its time listing the best parts of a particular place- all lovable tropes of the country music genre.

“Soon You’ll Get Better”

So I have yet to make it through this song without crying…and I’ve probably listened to the album at least seven times now. I often think of skipping it, but it is sonically catnip to me. A collaboration with the Dixie Chicks, this track is entirely acoustic, has tight female harmonies, and violin- what am I to do? This wildly personal song is about Taylor’s mother’s battle with cancer and the denial and grief she’s experienced around that so far. The song is stunning and more than anything, universal. Come to it prepared.

“False God”

Saxophone in a Taylor Swift song? Yes. “False God” sounds like it belongs specifically in a Speakeasy. It’s got breathy vocals, a slightly rambling melody, and extremely sexy lyrics. It’s not the most relatable song on the album; most of us aren’t superstars managing bi-continental relationships. But I like the world that it sucked me into.

“You Need to Calm Down”

Not only is this song pure Pop fun, “You Need to Calm Down” addresses three whole categories of internet haters. Those who make a habit of shooting mean tweets at celebrities and people they don’t know first thing in the morning, those who are anti-LGBTQ equality, and those who constantly pin female artists against each other- as though people don’t have the capacity to like more than one at a time. In the context of Lover, this is the song that most enforces “Spread love; not hate.”

“Afterglow”

I’m of the opinion that “Afterglow” has been a bit underrated since the arrival of the album. It’s a simple melody, but what’s incredible about this song is that it is notably the best her voice has ever sounded. Her instrument really shines here. It’s also one of the first Taylor Swift songs I’ve ever loved despite not relating to the content in the slightest. TS writes here from the perspective of someone who is tending to a relationship she wounded by relaxing so much into it that she lets anxiety get the better of her and lashes out. It’s a very specific relationship milestone that I’ve yet to ever reach myself, but she sings about it with such passion that I’m totally invested.

“ME!”

“ME!” is truly a Dr. Seuss book come to life. Not just because of the cartoonish joy in the video, but because of that same cartoonish joy that comes through in the vocals of both her and Brenden Urie. It’s not the most lyrically complex or dynamic song of the album, but by gosh it’s positive and catchy and it makes people happy. It also serves it’s purpose post Afterglow beautifully- acknowledging that even when she is a “handful,” her lover loves her still.

“It’s Nice to Have a Friend”

My favorite thing about this song is the ghostly background vocals and string instruments, both of which were provided by students at a not-for-profit after school music program in Toronto. Proceeds from the track are going to support the program and help keep arts education afloat. Knowing this took this song from a song that I liked to a song that I love. The song also truly captures the hope of the beginning so well and in so few words. “Twenty questions, we tell the truth. You’ve been stressed out lately, yeah me too. Something gave you the nerve to touch my hand, it’s nice to have a friend.”

“Daylight”

“Daylight” sounds like a sunrise. It makes you feel as though her life is finally beginning as this album is ending. The most enjoyable part of this song is the bridge where she compares what she once thought true love would be to what she knows it to be now. She calls back to her old self by singing, “I once believed love would be burning red, but it’s golden.” It’s simultaneously the most nostalgic track on the album and also the most hopeful, and I breathe with her when she sings “You gotta step into the daylight and let it go.” To quote her past life, “…in the death of her reputation she felt truly alive.”

Here’s a link to the blog post in case you wanna share with other Swifties <3

https://annalehnhoff.wordpress.com/2019/08/27/lovin-lover-a-taylor-swift-enthusiasts-review-of-new-album-lover/

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hot-mess-choices · 6 years

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Poison, Chapter 1 “Numb”

Pairing: Nathan Sterling/MC (Penelope “Penny” Curtis)

Warnings: toxic relationship, trauma, angst, sexual content in next chapters

Word Count: 1853 Words

Authors Note: Hello internet people! This is my very first published fanfic so I am really nervous about posting this. Given that English is not my native language, I hope you can overlook mistakes that were made, but be kind enough to educate me on them.

Feedback and constructive criticism is of course greatly appreciate!

Before we dive into this I want it to be completely clear that I in no way intended to romanticize abusive relationships. I’ve been in one in the past and I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. This is purely fictional and I‘d like to make it abundantly clear that this is not a Nathan redemption story, he’s still a villain, charming and alluring and irresistible, but still a villain. However, I found the ending of his and MCs relationship very anti-climactic and decided to let my MC suffer a bit more.

With that being said, enjoy the story kids!

I’m still not used to coming home to a quiet and empty apartment. It’s been close to two months since Zack moved in with Grant. I’m happy for them; I really am and maybe I’d be able to deal with being alone during Senior year better if it wasn’t for this damn suffocating silence. Every time I have a few quiet moments to myself, away from my friends and their shenanigans, I- I remember. Last year’s events creep up on me. I hear distant sirens, air that suddenly reeks of smoke, temperatures rising, glass bursting and his cold gaze cutting through me. It feels like I’m still there. I have left a part of me in this dark past and have not yet reclaimed it. I exhale deeply as I set down my groceries on the kitchen counter. Absent-minded I turn on the TV, not caring for the program; it’s just about to serve as a constant background noise anyway. As I unpack my bags, I play with the idea of maybe inviting someone over for tonight. But I quickly dismiss it. Most of my friends are too busy nowadays to make plans on such short notice. They probably wouldn’t turn me down, but I’d hate to bother them. Besides, it was already half past eight. I could probably call David. The two dates we had were going decent enough, but I’d risk sending him some mixed signals by inviting him over to my place at this time of day. He's been admirably respectful of my admittedly slow pace so far, and I don’t want to get his hopes up. I shouldn’t have gone out with him in the first place probably, given my current situation. So maybe I’ll just go to bed early and call it a day. The second I made my decision, the doorbell starts to ring. Cautiously I walk towards the door and press the button on the intercom: “Hello?” “Miss Curtis?” a deep voice fizzles through the speaker. I know who it is even before he says it out loud and my eyes dart to the small calendar that’s hung next to the door. “Miss Curtis, it is Felix Hail, he… he requested your company for the night and has sent me to escort you, as usual.” Felix is a good person. I hate for him to be caught up in this… this… whatever it is. “I was there last week. We agreed on meeting once every other week.” I try to sound confident and dismissive, but I can’t fool anyone. Felix can probably hear my excited heart beat through the intercom, it’s that loud. “I am well aware, Miss. Nevertheless, he insisted. You know how he gets when someone denies one of his requests.” A cold shiver runs down my back. I do know. I know it all too well. Why else would I still be paying for standing in his way one too many times. I am also well aware that if I do not follow his invite, Felix will get the end of it. I can’t let that happen. “Wait by the car. I’ll be with you in five.” I let go of the button. Piercing blue eyes dance mockingly through my mind and I can already see his pleased half-smile. I grab my coat and close the door on my way out. Once again obediently following the call of none other than Nathan Sterling, I disgust myself. “Should I turn up the heat, Miss?” Felix asks as I climb into the back seat of the sleek Porsche limousine. He always sends the same. I know he has other cars, but I think he takes great pleasure in making things my routine and being in control. “I’m good. Thanks, Felix.” He gives me a sympathetic look through the rear view mirror and starts the car. My mind starts to drift off. How did I end up in this mess? I walked right into it, on my own accord, that’s how. I’m such an idiot. After last year ended with the horrific realisation that the guy I’d been dating was a cold blooded sociopath who wanted nothing but harm to me and my friends, I just wished for a tame summer to recover from all this hurt. But the summer ended up being everything but tame. I was called as a witness to the trials of all the Alphas. I did my best to highlight how horrible their actions truly were. And then I saw Nathan and how he couldn’t be bothered by any of it. His family’s lawyer, stone faced and I knew that he would do anything to get as close to winning this case as possible. I remember how they made this stupid deal that put Nathan under house arrest with electronic monitoring, limited access of communications, an approved list of visitors for private meetings and a sheer endless list of people who could visit with his parents present. What a laughable sentence. Being locked up in your millionaire mansion should not be considered punishment. I don’t know how, but somehow I ended up on the approved private visitor list and he invited me over. Invited is probably the wrong term here. He sent Felix, who told me that “my attendance at the Sterling’s annual end-of-summer charity auction was demanded by the young Mr Sterling.” I should have declined. I should have sent him the meanest, coldest and most hurtful turn down in the history of turn downs, so he would not dare to even think of me ever again, but… I’d like to think that it was my curiosity that lead me to follow this highly questionable request. It could have been the journalist in me, that wanted to know what this was all about. It could have been the strong and empowered woman in me, that wanted to spit in his face one last time. But it was really just the lovesick vulnerable college girl, Nathan still held all this power over. I thoroughly searched my past far and wide, but out of all the people I’ve ever had a romantic connection with, not one of them made me feel the way Nathan did. It’s this primal feeling of raw soul-crushing emotion he gives me. Like we are two parts of a whole, constantly drawn to each other and unable to let go. At least that’s what it feels like to me. I know deep down that this will end badly. I know that he just wants to see me suffer and make me pay for what I did to him. But I just can’t bring myself to leave. All my friends told me that I needed time. That I should take time to heal. Abbie suggested therapy. Kait and Zack joked about a rebound. But none of that seemed reasonable when all I wanted was him. I needed to feel his skin on mine. I want his lips all over me. His scent embracing me. I want his eyes to impale me with their gaze. They don’t understand. His poison is running through every inch of my being and being near him seems to be the only thing that makes it bearable. That day in late August, I just had to see him. I had to be with him. I had to. That’s why I dressed up and let Felix drive me to the Sterling’s estate. I could barely take in all the expensive cars parked out front or all the rich folks dressed in their finest evening attire. I didn’t even have time to feel intimidated. Felix led me straight inside. Up the stairs. To him. It’s been like that ever since. Every other week Felix appears on my porch to take me there. Every time I come with him. Every time I leave the next day, more intoxicated and addicted than before. And now? Will this become a weekly appointment now? And then? Every second day? Every day? Will I be his live in plaything? Will he eventually grow tired of me or will this go on forever? Can I live like that? Do I want to live like that? A cold shiver runs down my spine. I do, don’t I? Something inside of me was terrifyingly excited at that thought. I think I’m going to be sick. “Pull over Felix” “Miss, is everything al—” “Pull over!” Quick to follow my forceful tone, the car comes to a halt by the side of the road. I yank the door open and step out. Cold air fills my lungs as I take deep breaths. It’s almost December, the sun had sunken hours ago, and I should be freezing. Yet, the cold is strangely calming. “Miss, are you not feeling well, you seem awfully pale. Do you want to sit down? I could take you back home, if you desire to do so.” Felix has left his place behind the steering wheel and now stands next to me. I’ll never get used to how tall he is. What is he? 6’5? Damn. His broad shoulders cast a looming shadow onto the poorly lit street. In combination with his deep voice, he could have the potential of being one of the most intimidating people I know but his kind features beg to differ. I never asked, but I’d assume that he is in his late forties, maybe early fifties. His once brown hair is turning grey and his soft hazel eyes are surrounded by small wrinkles. I force a weak smile on my face. “I’m good, just needed some fresh air, that’s all.” He doesn’t even try to look convinced. He has been working for the Sterlings for too long to know how bad for your health they can be. “I can take you back and tell him that you weren’t home when I tried to pick you up.” Felix gives me a troubled look, clearly struggling to keep a professional distance between us. “He’d not be happy about that. I really don’t want him to be angry with you.” Might as well be honest with him now, right? He lets out a small joyless grunt. “Occupational hazard. I’m used to temper tantrums by now. I’ve been working for this family for twenty-eight years after all.” His big hand twitches upwards as if he wanted to pat my shoulder, but he reconsiders and takes a step back instead. “My apologies, it is not my place to speak ill of my employers.” His back straightens. “I won’t snitch on you, Felix. Let’s go, Nathan doesn’t appreciate it when people aren’t on time, right?” Pressing my lips together, I walk past him and get back inside the car. Before I slam the door shut, I hear Felix sigh something along the line with “Poor girl, where will this end?” I’ve asked myself this question far too often to care anymore. Self-pity is really not a good look on me and a real wast of time. I don’t care about what’s going to happen to me. Nathan can do whatever he wants. I’m numb.

Tags: @immortalmurphy

#playchoices #choices stories you play #Nathan Sterling #The Freshman #The Sophmore #The Junior #The Senior #Natan/MC #fanfic #tf/ts/tj/ts

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daily-dose-of-imagines · 4 years

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(っ◔◡◔)っ 𝕄𝕒𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕦𝕡♥

InuYasha, Full Metal Alchemist, and Yu-Gi-Oh! Match-Up Request

May I please have a match-up for these fandoms? :) Thank you very much :D

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 25

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory. I work 12 hours (5:30pm to 6am) 2-2-3.

Birthplace: Memphis, TN, USA. I was raised in the neighborhood called Frayser which is the most impoverished area in Memphis and has a high crime rate as expected.

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2)

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood, corruption/injustice, close-mindedness

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well. These things are pretty annoying for me to deal with whenever they flare up.

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★

Hello @sacredwarrior88 and thank you for submitting with us! I hope you like the boys we matched you up with!

>Admin 𝕋

Hello hello~! Thank you so much for submitting your request with us! We apologize that it took so long to get out, but here it is! I handled the YGO portion of your match-up. Again, like Admin T said, we hope you enjoy who we’ve matched you up with!

» » Admin Ko

★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★

𝐼 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽...

Out of all the charactsers in fullmetal alchemist I can definitely see Scar as being someone that would truly appreciate you! If we just skip by the homicidal tendencies, he would be such a gentle lover! I feel we would really appreciate your body and your appearances to the absolute maximum, I can definitely see Scar as someone who would constantly compliment you, especially if you are feeling pretty insecure one day! He was also love the you wear glasses; not because he likes people that where glasses, but only because you just look too damn cute in them!

He also hates people who are arrogant and mean manipulative to get what they want, so I feel you two could really bond on that! As for personality, I feel that Scar would compliment your stubbornness and cockiness. He will also the love the fact that you say what is on your mind, and can be a little sarcastic when you want to be! He thinks it is a little sexy to him, how you stand up for yourself and don’t take shit from nobody, even from him sometimes. He will see that you strong and independent when you need, but can also become very empathetic and cry tears of sadness for anything and anybody that has experienced anything bad in their life.

Scar is the same way when it comes to being verbally affectionate; he is really not good with words, but he is great with actions. So seeing as you are the same way as him, he will really appreciate and love the fact that you wouldn’t judge him for it! He will feel accepted around you, you will make him feel safe to be himself and show you his vulnerable side, so that he isn’t alone anymore, you will be there for him. When he needs to cry, you will be there to be his shoulder to cry on, you will be his crutch when he needs help standing up. He will love the fact that you give hugs and petnames; every time you call him something different in an affectionate way, it will go straight to his heart, and make him feel like he is walking on water or flying high up in the clouds.

This stoic demon will be the one for you! He will love how you look, though he hates human, he will make an exception for you! The most enthralling part he will find about you, is your hair and how curly it is. He will love how it looks if a breeze comes by and rustles it, making it move beautifully. As for physicals, he wouldn’t care much for it, all that matters is that you are strong and can take care of yourself without needing someone else’s help, for the most part! He will see that you are independent and can take no shit from anybody, and he will find that very admirable, and something he would definitely cherish in a lover.

He will love how sarcastic you are, and how on the other side of it you can be the nicest person, when they deserve it. He will see how emotional you can be, and how you can cry for anything and think it is very cute; charming in a way, since it is something that he can’t really understand. He will understand that you aren’t affectionate in the verbal sense, but more in the written and body language sense, and honestly, he would like that better then you constantly telling him how you feel about him. He would find that quite annoying.

He will see that sometimes you can be down on yourself, and he will try to make sure that you are okay, or will try to sheer you up. Key word, try, here. Most of the time he fails, but the efforts wouldn’t go unnoticed. It’s the effort that would help the most, because it shows that he cares and that he wants you happy and not so self loathing. He will try to tell you that you are much more than your insecurities and then list all the great things about you. And then once he was done, he will just walk away because, wow, that was embarrassing even more for him. He doesn’t usually go on rants like that. Especially to help someone.

But all in all, I feel Sesshomaru would be the perfect man, for you, since he has the same ideal as you, would love how you keep more to yourself in an introvert way, but at the same time can be super affectionate when you want to be. Someone who can teach him what it means to feel and have emotions. To cry when you feel sad and laugh when something is amusing to him. You are the one for him!

»»————-　♡　————-««

ᴊᴏᴇʏ ᴡʜᴇᴇʟᴇʀ

It’s to the absolute surprise of no one that initially meeting, you both don’t start off on the right foot. With how energetic and confrontational he can be, Joey isn’t necessarily the best when it comes to making friends quickly. Thus, the relationship you both have in the beginning starts off rocky.

With time though, and a lot of assurance from your friends and his friends, you both interact with one another properly in neutral terrain where you can both get to know one another without jumping the gun too quickly. It’s through this that Joey begins to slowly garner a crush for you. He loves your stubborn and rough minded self as it not only correlates well with his, but serves as a sort of reminder / signal to him that not only should he try to tone it down, but try to keep you from blowing up unnecessarily. Though this doesn’t work often as you both don’t hesitate to double team on someone with wit and sarcastic comebacks.

He loves your snark and your blunt way of speaking. As someone who never enjoyed it when people blatantly lied or beat around the bush with him, he appreciates the sharp honesty you provide for him. Though of course this won’t be one sided as he’ll be sure to give you his own thoughts and opinions.

Overall, Joey may be rough around the edges, but he’s loyal to a fault and won’t hesitate to help you overcome any obstacle. No matter how big or small. He’s adamant in becoming your boulder in those bouts of spells and will always remind you that no matter what he’ll be there for you.

#submissions #matchup #matchups #submission #inuyasha matchup #fullmetal alchemist matchup #yuigioh mtachup

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