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#I just don't have the words to describe it
ryuryuryuyurboat · 2 days
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the cutest pair
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synopsis: how kinich shows his affection! aren't you the cutest pair?
genre: fluff
characters: kinich x gn! reader
warnings: established r/s, kinich might be a little ooc
a/n: mama you don't understand i'm in love with a boy🥹 likes, reblogs and comments highly appreciated!!
©2024 ryuryuryuyurboat. do not repost, translate, plagiarise, or modify in any way, shape or form.
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kinich, in all honesty, was horrible at showing emotions. he’s reserved, introverted, and sometimes came off a little colder than he intended to be — an unfortunate result of his childhood. how he ever got together with you despite his cold front was probably one of the great mysteries of teyvat. even as a lover, he still tended to be silent to some extent, preferring to let you do most of the talking while he stayed behind. sometimes you wondered if you scored a partner or a sentient shadow, with the way he normally observed conversations with your friends instead of joining in. what you failed to notice, however, was the way his eyes would only be trained on you as you laughed and chatted, the faintest smile on his lips at the sight of you having fun.
kinich would never be described to be ‘eloquent’ by most. pragmatic, direct, and efficient, the side of him everyone knew was one that was curt and cold. but those he was close to knew better. so it didn’t matter that he was less talkative, because he would always make up for it with his acts of service. action always speaks louder than words, right? it was always the little things, like making sure you walked on the side furthest from the edge of the clifftops, always staying one step in front of you in case the saurians you wanted to feed decided that you were better off as enemies. 
kinich may not look it to many, but he’s observant. individuals have approached you countless times before, accusing kinich of being too aloof and uncaring for even his own partner, but you knew better. just like the time you woke up with an inexplicable feeling of melancholy, and he left your house only to return in 20 minutes with your favourite food in hand. how did he know what it was? well, he said, i heard you mention it to mualani last time she visited, so i wrote it down in my notebook. believe it or not, he’d completely filled up at least 5 notebooks since the day you met, fully detailed with things you’d mentioned in passing, and observations of your behaviour. he’d never show them to you, though if you asked cutely, maybe he’d relent and allow a tiny peek.
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a-fangirltrash · 1 day
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"Ford treated Fiddleford so bad!!" As if him treating Fidds like shit wasn't directly a product of being constantly gaslighted and abused by Bill.
I'm genuinely getting tired of people flaming Ford, but in a serious tone. Like people are acting like he's a toxic selfish man that used to put Fidd down... and... no he never did???
Ford ADMIRED Fiddleford, he TRUSTED his friend for what he described as "the project of his life" and Ford, being the most prideful man in the world, decided to ask for help because he knew how CAPABLE Fiddleford was.
When Fiddleford arrived Ford let him know how thankful he was that he was there with him, the man even took a bath and made sure to make him feel like he was at home. Ford even remembered his favorite bean brand?
When Fidd got traumatized by the gremoblin, Ford TRIED to help with what he knew. He tried to help him meditate, took days off for him, decided that they could go out and have some good time. Be mindful that this might've been the total OPPOSITE of what Bill wanted, and he still did for his friend sanity. Bill would make Ford work like CRAZY.
Also, for him it wasn't "putting him in danger!!" For him it was sharing adventures with his friend! Just like hi did with *cofcofSTANLEYcofcof*. That's love language all around.
Fiddleford could abandon the project anytime, but he didn't because he liked being there. And Ford is NOT the guilty one for Fidds creatinf the gun :/ it's nor his fault that fidd interpreted "using his creativity" in that way. Ford NEVER approved that gun.
Also, Ford noticed that RUBIK THING, HE APPREACITE HIM SO MUCH HE KNEW HIS HABITS. AND GOT CONCERNED RIGHT AHEAD.
"B-but he free Frilliam!" The portal was close, did you all READ how much gaslighted Ford was at that point? He didn't free it because "ugh i don't care about this shitty axolotl" but because Bill started to freak out and yell at him to get rid of it. Ford wrote "A friend" with a heart in the title??? Wdym he didn't appreciate it aaaagh
If Stanley took the diaries (i don't like this universe because...stanley:() he WOULD have looked for Fiddleford, they'd have made the Institute of Oddology, he'd have shared his success... with the man that helped him the most.
TBOB SPOILERS AHEAD
He got sad when Fiddleford told him he was gonna get back home to spent time with his family, he PLANNED holidays with him. Even if he DIDN'T like holidays.
He took a day off just to make him happy after his atrocious christmas party, he USED RESOURCES that as you know ford is the most practical mam in the world JUST to decorate the portal as a tree and make Fiddleford happy.
And that atuff of "h-he doesn't appreaciated Fiddleford gifts!" IS SO DUMB OMG, he wore the gloves in the snow and was incredibly thankful about them. When BILL that dumbass triangle pretty much LACERATED his hands, he used Fiddleford gloves as a way to hide those scars, and in a sense, probably to comfort himself because he was ALONE.
I think that was the reason of Fiddleford fast forgiveness, not only because he's a sweet heart, but because after fighting with Bill i think he noticed how BIG was the monster torturing his "partner".
And after all of this i'm not trying to excuse Ford treating him poorly and not listening to him in time
BUT FORD IS NOT A PERFECT VICTIM
Even if i believe he wasn't "the" (at least only) reason of Fiddleford becoming crazy, i know it could have been better for him and he could have avoided so much trauma. But can we please stop seeing Ford as a selfish, evil mad scientist and start seing him as a victim... of a terribly abusive relationship that checks in for all types of domestic abuse... please!!! Ford is not a perfect VICTIM Can we blame Bill!!!
All this rant is because there's certain ship... which i kinda like, but i just HATE HATE HATE the interpretation and how much they put Ford as a villian on it omg
Edit: fixed the use of word narcissism, since it might've been ableist! Replaced with words that actually relate to what i intended to say, instead of referencing a personality disorder
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paper-mario-wiki · 6 hours
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hey so …question.
i was raised male. biologically female. it’s for very greek hero reasoning, i promise. nothing boring ever happens in my family.
i don’t want to be male. i want to be female. would it be appropriate to call myself a trans woman? it’s something i like using…but i don’t want to appropriate or anything.
hmmm
"trans" is a modifier word, right? that's why it's important to leave a space in "transwoman", because there's no such thing as a entity that is a "transwoman", there is only "a woman that is trans". i consider myself to be a woman. i often say "trans woman", but only because i usually like to describe myself as accurately as possible.
the meaning in the word "trans" is from the relevant change made in one's life. being raised as a boy, i never had anyone teach me to do my makeup, or to put on a dress. during thanksgiving and christmas i was never expected to be in the kitchen with all my sisters and aunts, because that wasn't seen as my responsibility. i don't know how to braid my hair-- i didn't even know how to tie a ponytail for the longest time. all of these things are things i've had to learn as an adult in order for me to start fitting into the social expectations of womanhood. those things are what i'd consider to have been the bulk of the effort in my "transition" so far, and none of them are biological.
if we are going by the bio-essentialist argument (that is to say, the taxonomic origins of the terms "trans man" and "trans woman"), then i'd say "no, you cant use it, because you are biologically female". but then, what's the point of being supportive of trans people if we're still capitulating to the standards of qualification the people oppressing us set?
can i use this reasoning to tell you empirically "yeah you can use this term"? i dont think so, but that's just because of how damn specific your situation is. i have very little knowledge about your actual life, so i dont know how much of a transition you'll have to make to start feeling comfortable as a woman. but hopefully this'll at least give you some perspective on figuring it out for yourself.
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1d1195 · 1 day
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Honey VI
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Read Honey here | ~5.3k words
From me: I know not everyone likes smut so you can read this part directly after part 4 if you'd like. All you need to know is that they had sex in part 5.
Warnings: ANGST, fluff, mentions of sex but not describing everything. I don't think you'll like the ending to this part hehehe
Summary: “Hey kitten,” he hummed, settling her on the mattress. She looked so perfect there. Beautiful.
“Hmm?” She tucked herself into his sheets. Her face smushed into his pillow. He smiled, rubbed his hand on her hip and slipped into bed beside her. Her eyes were closed.
“Happy belated birthday.”
She snorted and tucked her face into his chest. “Thank you, Harry,” she whispered.
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Harry tossed the blanket on the back of the couch across her body. She was stretched out the length of his, her ear right on his chest, her hands cupped on the top of each of his shoulders. Her hips wedged between his legs. He wondered if she felt that his dick was already hardening pressing against the fabric of her underwear.
Pulling the thin piece of her panties from her center was one of the hottest things he had ever done before lining himself up with her. He worried he would never want her to take her underwear off just so he could gaze at the way it looked. (Although he was certain he could be convinced otherwise). His hands went to her back, and he kissed the top of her head. “You okay, love?” He asked. She nodded silently. “Y’sure?” Another wordless shake of her head. Harry ran his hand up and down her spine lightly tracing her skin like there was a pattern for him to follow. “Y’can sleep, kitten,” he whispered.
She had sex before, but it was never like that. Her body was exhausted, her face felt flushed and yeah, she was really sleepy. “Mmm?” She sighed. “Okay,” she mumbled.
“Night, love,” he kissed along her hairline.
*
They both seemed to wake up at the same time and without a clock or their phones nearby, there was no way to tell how late it was. Cece hadn’t made a peep, so she was still in the early stages of her deepest sleep. So only a few hours had passed, since her bedtime. It was still pitch black, so the power hadn’t returned either.
Harry kissed her hairline again, unaware that she was awake. In response, she kissed his chest, nosing at his skin.
“You’re so pretty.”
“You can’t see me.”
“Don’t need to.”
She smiled.
“Tell me ‘bout you,” he murmured.
“Tell you what?”
“Well, I know your favorite food is French fries and that y’like dogs more than cats. I know y’love your family even if they’re lazy and don’t show how much they love you. I know where y’went t’school and your best friend’s name is Eliza even if y’hardly see her or talk t’her.”
“There’s not much else to know,” she shrugged one shoulder.
“Why did y’start nannying? With your degree?”
She bit her lip. “I babysat most of my life,” but her voice had an edge to it. There was more and she didn’t want to tell him. Harry could sense it.
“Y’have a psychology degree with a concentration in child development. And y’have a minor in business. Something tells me that y’didn’t intend t’be a nanny. Even if you’re good at it.”
There was a long pause. Harry thought she fell asleep again. Her voice was soft. “I don’t want to scare you.”
“Scare me?”
She nodded. “It’s that baggage I mentioned?”
“I told you I would carry it,” he reminded her.
She didn’t think he didn’t mean it, but she didn’t think he knew what he was saying right before he slid his finger inside her. Her brain was already mush at that point and Harry could have told her anything as long as he made her come the way he did. Taking a deep breath, she was grateful for the dark. “I’ve wanted to be a mom my whole life,” she explained. That didn’t surprise him in the least. The way she held Cece and how kind, adoring, and doting it would be obvious to someone who was blind that she was going to be the most tremendous mother.
“I took care of dolls my entire childhood. Then there was my baby brother. I babysat from the time I was thirteen and all throughout college,” another deep breath. “I met my one and only ex-boyfriend on my first day of college classes. I was eighteen in an intro to business class. I figured if I wanted to open a daycare of my own, it would be good knowledge, right?” Harry’s finger danced along the side of her neck stroking a line up and down not saying anything, just listening. “He was young and didn’t want kids and I didn’t blame him. What eighteen-year-old does? I know I was a rarity—I had a baby brother and was around babies my whole life. I figured he would have grown out of it.”
“He didn’t grow out of it?” Harry asked.
“No... but he told me that he was definitely changing his mind. Every time I mentioned our future or our future children, he just...” she sighed. “He would say things like ‘of course, angel,’” her tone dropped an octave to imitate him. “But he talked about business and cruises. He talked about these extravagant parties and gatherings. Living overseas and expanding his business,” she shrugged. “It sounded nice, but I wanted kids.”
“You were still young,” Harry murmured. He wasn’t agreeing, but he was curious how her college-sweetheart just stopped being that. Surely that was something that would change with time.
“That’s why I stayed with him,” her voice was indifferent. “It wasn’t a bad thing at the time. I knew we both still had plenty of time,” her throat caught on the word time, and she cleared it. “He actually encouraged me to start nannying.”
Harry didn’t like her ex because she deserved everything she wanted. If she wanted to sell Harry’s company, he would do it for her. All he wanted was to see her smile. But if he was the reason that Harry found her... well... maybe he couldn’t hate him too much.
“I’ve always been pretty nurturing, protective, et cetera...” she shrugged. “My friends called me mom in college. I walked around with a mini pharmacy in my purse, and I never got drunk in college because I was busy taking care of my friends. So, my boyfriend figured I would do well, and he introduced me to a friend of a friend who wanted someone to watch their newborn.” She rolled her lips into her mouth before continuing. “I was twenty-two and I have loved babies my whole life. I stopped nannying him when he was three years old. That sweet little boy would be five now and I worry about him every day. Leaving him was the hardest thing I ever did.”
Harry frowned and kissed the top of her head, squeezing her gently. “Why?”
“His parents weren’t around. You said you felt like you weren’t there for Cece. Harry, you have no idea what some parents are like. I was going to doctor’s visits and buying Christmas presents for him on behalf of his parents. I took him to visit family that treated me like his big sister or an aunt—like I was their family and not his parents. It was awful. When I left, I felt like I gave my own child to a pair of strangers. It hurt so much. I cried for a week and seriously considered never babysitting ever again,” she sniffed and shook her head. “I stopped following them on social media. I would have kept asking because I was so scared. I had to stop, or I would... never let go and he wasn’t mine. He wasn’t,” she shook her head. “They made sure to tell me so. Every time I encouraged a change in eating habits or suggested they monitor his sleeping... they berated me for overstepping.”
“Probably because they were embarrassed, love,” he frowned and cupped the back of her head. Harry was seriously addicted to kissing her. It didn’t have to be her lips, though he loved that too. Kissing her hairline and touching her soft, delicate face was becoming his favorite thing.
“Yeah, but...” she shrugged. “It means a lot to me that you value my opinion. I don’t think you’re a bad dad at all, but you don’t mind asking questions. It’s... it’s like, I would never open a business without asking for your help,” she explained. “Does that make sense?”
“Perfect sense,” he nodded. “I would be lost without you,” his heart hurt on her behalf. “Why did y’leave?” He asked.
She swallowed. “They were pregnant,” Harry waited. “I was there six days a week from six in the morning until eight in the evening. I was exhausted and it wasn’t because I didn’t love what I was doing, I did. I loved it so much,” she whispered. “But they had made me the most important part of their family and they didn’t even know their little boy,” her voice cracked. “He told me he wished I was his mom,” her voice was hardly audible.
“Oh, kitten,” he pulled her in closer. “He loved you so much.”
“It wasn’t fair to me,” she sniffled. “I just left him.”
“Y’had to, love.”
“He told me he hated me.”
“He was three, sweetheart. Of course he did,” he hummed and kissed the top of her head. “Y’were his favorite person, his best friend.” She sobbed and Harry held her tighter, wishing he could take her pain away. “Y’did the right thing,” he assured her. “Even if it didn’t feel like it.”
She swallowed. “Everyone told me I was an idiot.”
Harry frowned. “Who said that?”
“My family, my boyfriend, my friends,” she listed. “It was such a good job. I could pay my rent and all my bills. I hung out with the cutest kid,” she swallowed.
“Did y’tell them all that other stuff?”
She nodded. “Yeah. They didn’t get it. My boyfriend said I was getting to have a baby—two even, without having to ruin my body or any—”
“God, please tell me y’broke up with him.”
She huffed a breath of sniveling laughter. “Not yet.”
Harry sighed. “So y’found another family?”
She nodded. “I had babysat for Mitch and Sarah before. I was so heartbroken, but I’m a sucker for a cute kid and a mom and dad that are in desperate need of a date night,” she smiled. “Have you seen their kid?”
He chuckled. “He’s sweet, huh?”
“I watched him weekly. Just a date night. It was only a few hours, but they were in awe because I would get bored and clean or whatever they needed. I just did it. I didn’t think about it because I was just...used to it. So, they said they had a couple that needed a nanny,” she swallowed. “I was genuinely scared. I was afraid I would be taken advantage of and I was worried... worried I was going to fall in love with them again,” she whispered. “I did, but it was better this time. Hannah and Pete were parents who wanted to be parents. They loved me, I’m sure you saw, but I was just there to keep their babies safe.”
Harry remembered the glowing recommendations. “Tara and Xavier right?” He asked. She nodded.
“It was a blessing Tara was three years old when I met her and not Xavier. I might not have done it.”
“What about your boyfriend?”
She swallowed. “I was home more, and I noticed that...he wasn’t.”
“What was his name? Y’never said.”
“Cody,” she mumbled.
There was more quiet that ensued while she gathered her thoughts. “I was twenty-four and we had been together for almost seven years...” she took a deep breath. “I didn’t want to be married necessarily nor have kids right that second... but...”
“But he didn’t really change?” He finished.
“No, he did,” her voice was hollow. “Just... not for me.”
Oh no. “Kitten,” he hummed. “What—”
“She was pregnant,” she said softly. “Three months along by the time I found out.”
Harry meant what he said about Cece and a sibling. She was still his baby, and he wanted to make sure she got the attention she deserved because he loved her more than anything in the world. But that didn’t mean he didn’t want to give her a sibling. One with Miss Honey? Harry could only be so lucky. “I hate Cody,” he grumbled.
“I’m not really a fan myself,” she whispered. Harry kissed her forehead and wished he could take her heart out and massage it like it was a sore muscle and fix it for her. “Hannah insisted I move in,” she swallowed. “I felt so stupid.”
“That was not your fault, love. Y’shouldn’t feel stupid. He’s an idiot.”
“I love my family,” she whispered. “I love them more than anything on this earth,” she swallowed. “But sometimes, I don’t think anyone loves me the way I love them,” she mumbled. “I feel really selfish saying that and I just thought that if I had a family of my own, the one I imagined with Cody and all the babies I wanted to have, then maybe I would feel loved. Like I was someone’s first choice because...” she trailed off and Harry felt a tear fall on his chest right from her cheek. She didn’t speak and Harry waited and waited.
“Christ, kitten,” he muttered. “If y’want a family. Y’deserve one.”
She didn’t say anything. Maybe she didn’t want to cry more; honestly, Harry didn’t want her to cry either. He wasn’t sure he could console her without promising to marry her right then and there. How someone dated her for seven years and never proposed was beyond him. It hadn’t even been seven hours since he’d been inside her and he was considering it.
“I’d have to quit nannying,” she added her voice was quiet. “I’m also only freshly twenty-seven. There’s still ample time. But... I have a lot of trust issues, obviously.”
“Kitten,” he tutted. “Don’t you think—”
“I don’t want to scare you,” she started which instantly made his heart beat a little faster. His body felt a little hotter. His throat a little tighter around the words he was going to say. “But I’m... my biological clock is a slave to time and if Cece turns five and starts kindergarten, then I’m probably going to have to—”
“Love, stop,” he interrupted. He wanted to say that he would give her everything. But he had her body wrapped around his less than three hours ago. Coming around his fingers, his tongue, his dick.
“Harry, I...” she swallowed. “I love Cece. An embarrassing amount,” she had a smile in her voice. “It’s impossible to find someone understanding of the nanny thing. Now I’ll always worry that the person I’m with is off making his own family with someone else,” she admitted.
“So you’re jus’ going t’accept that and... not have a family of your own?”
“No, I’ve done some research on sperm donation. It’s my best option. And that’s fine. I’ve always wanted to be a mom. I’m not sure I’d be a good wife.”
There was truly no way Harry could fathom that. There was no way she wasn’t the best at anything she did. Fuck, she was a better secretary than anyone he could possibly hire. “How are you holding up with all that baggage?”
“Light as a feather,” he mumbled grumpily. He kissed her temple. He was already planning, plotting. Hoping.
“It... it was nice talking about it,” she whispered. “What’s in your dick that made me blab all that?”
He chuckled. “Truth serum.”
“That’s disgusting,” she gagged. “Don’t tell other girls that, they won’t like it. You’re lucky I’m so cool.”
Harry wanted to ask her if she really thought there were other girls. There weren’t. But if there had been, they paled in comparison to her. There was no one else. There could be no one else anymore. He had been waiting for someone like her, unable to believe he could have someone like her any longer. He had a baby to care for and a company to run. Women didn’t love him for him anymore.
Harry didn’t love anyone besides his baby, his company, and his family.
But he hadn’t accounted for Miss Honey and her sweetness, her kindness.
After a few minutes of silence, Harry realized how tired he was again. Poor thing had to be emotionally exhausted as well. He gently moved her to the inside of the couch “Sit up for me, kitten,” he asked quietly. She rubbed her eye that extra cute way that she did like when he went to her bedroom door in the middle of the night for help with Cece.
He slipped his boxers back on and turned off the little battery-operated candles. There were scrabble pieces all over the floor, but he would deal with them in the morning. She was half asleep, eyes fluttering and trying to stay open. He grabbed their clothes from the floor and threw them into her lap with the blanket that was still wrapped around her.
Harry scooped her into his embrace, cradling her like he was carrying a bride. It made his heart skip a beat. Without discussing it, he carried her to his bedroom. He didn’t want to be apart from her. It felt like he was carrying half his heart in his arms. Her fall blanket had been long since swapped out with a Christmas one and it was draped haphazardly across her keeping her warm as the only thing she wore was the scrap of fabric she was passing off as underwear and that pretty pink bra. “Hey kitten,” he hummed, settling her on the mattress. She looked so perfect there. Beautiful.
“Hmm?” She tucked herself into his sheets almost instantly. Her face smushed into his pillow. He smiled, rubbed his hand on her hip and slipped into bed beside her. Her eyes were closed.
“Happy belated birthday.”
She snorted and tucked her face into his chest. “Thank you, Harry,” she whispered falling asleep nearly the moment she finished speaking.
*
Sleeping with her boss might be the dumbest thing she had ever done.
About ten of her romance novels consisted of this very plot line and she was victim of it per her own doing. Harry’s heavy arm was draped around her waist leaving her trapped beneath it and his soft bedding.
Fortunately, before she had time to spiral, Cece made her presence known. It gave her a reprieve from thinking about how stupid she was. It was something tangible to focus on that wasn’t the ache between her legs from having Harry—
She shook her head. Without another sound in the house, not even the quiet hum of the heating system, it heightened the sound of Cece’s small cry.
She pulled herself out from under Harry, frowning at how cold it was outside his blanket-like body. The first article of clothing she plucked from the floor—which happened to be one of Harry’s T-shirts—and slipped it over her body. Quietly, she went to Cece’s room. “Hello sweet girl,” her voice was soft, and Cece stopped crying instantly. “What are you doing?” She cooed. Cece continued to fuss without crying, so she scooped her up and kissed the side of her head. “Is it the rain and thunder?” She asked. “It’s okay. It’s just a little weather,” she assured her. “Are you cold?” she whispered. “I know,” she sighed. “Let’s go see if Daddy can keep us warm,” she murmured, kissing her temple.
Before she took one step to turn around, a hand circled the front of her stomach, pressing low, making her eyes flutter because Harry had touched and pressed so many parts of her body and he seemed to pull noises and warmth from her without even trying.
Harry’s lips found the curve of her shoulder where it met her neck, and peppered kisses along the made-up path he created from her shoulder to her ear. “You’re so good with her,” he murmured. “It’s so hot,” he whispered. She shivered even though she was about ten thousand degrees warmer than she was a moment before. “She’s cold?” he mumbled into her neck.
She nodded, unable to speak with his mouth on her pulse. He steered her out of the room by her hips, his fingers pressing against spots that he had pressed only hours before. Back toward the living room where he had made her come more times in one sitting than she had in weeks. Her cheeks felt warm as she followed his silent direction—like she was returning to the scene of a crime.
A really hot, sexy crime.
Harry left for his room again, but it was only moments before he was back at her side. He pulled her toward the couch making her stomach flip with the knowledge of what they did. He stretched his legs across the chaise part of the sofa and pulled her down, so her bum wedged between his leg and the sofa arm. Her legs stretched perpendicularly to his, across the couch.
Harry pulled the comforter he had dragged from his room across the three of them and snagged Cece’s crescent pillow from the floor, half under the couch from where it had landed while he was holding her legs open earlier. Harry kept that thought to a minimum as it was late, and she was sleepily holding his daughter. Gently, he tucked the pillow under her arms so most of Cece’s weight would be supported. “S’this dangerous?” He asked curiously.
“A few months ago, yeah... But I’m a pretty light sleeper. She’ll move before it’s an issue.”
Harry kissed the top of her head which had shifted down to the front of his shoulder. “You’re warm?”
“Very,” she promised.
“She’s warm?” He asked.
She wrapped her arms tighter around her and kissed her forehead, making Harry’s heart ache. “Mmm... are you warm?”
“Very,” he smiled. Even if he wasn’t, it was sweet she cared to ask. She was the one holding the baby. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For being you,” he murmured.
She tilted her head up and her beautiful wide eyes gazed at him and her lips curved upward so cutely he felt downright hot. No need for a blanket when he could see her smile like that. Harry cupped the side of her head. His thumb brushed along her cheek.
The quiet beating of his heart was under her ear and made her fall asleep.
*
Cece woke them up along with every light on in the house signaling the power was back. Harry’s shoulder felt deadened from her head against it for so many hours. He blinked against the light and glanced at the Scrabble tiles strung haphazardly on the floor. “Good morning, Miss Cecelia,” she cooed and kissed her forehead. “We’re nice and toasty, hmm?”
Harry smiled. His heart so completely full. As full as his arms felt.
“Let’s go change your bum, yeah?” She twisted slightly. “Hold her so I don’t injure you?” She smiled awkwardly. Harry really did a number on her hair while he made out with her last night, but she was still so beautiful it hurt. Her face still had a post-orgasmic glow about it and honestly it was kind of her to worry about Harry’s dick so close to her butt and not wanting to injure him, but she could probably feel it—a reminder that he was so turned on by her.
Harry kissed Cece’s cheek repeatedly. “Good morning, my sweet girl,” he cooed and nosed at her soft skin. She giggled happily and left an open-mouthed kiss on his face making him fall harder for the little baby.
Miss Honey hadn’t moved an inch while she watched the interaction, only inches from her face and she smiled sadly as she finally moved off his lap. Harry was so cold without her body around his it took every ounce of his effort to refrain from pulling her right back down.
She was still in his T-shirt and because her underwear was thin and hiding between her plump butt cheeks, it looked like she wasn’t wearing anything underneath. Harry also had to refrain from groaning at the sight. He was glad the comforter was thrown over his lap because it hid the massive amount of indecency he was sporting at the sight of her. She plucked Cece from him and headed down the hall.
Harry picked up the Scrabble tiles trying to forget how good she tasted on the back of his couch so the blood in his body would drain to anywhere else but it’s current space. Eventually, she returned to the kitchen. Unfortunately, she was wearing pants and Harry thought it was unfair she didn’t even ask if he could get another look beforehand.
Cece was wrapped, as always, around her as she started her morning routine. Food, bottle, tea, coffee. Business as always. “Kitten, y’don’t have to—”
“I don’t mind,” she wasn’t facing him. But he could practically feel the heat of her cheeks, flushed with embarrassment. Her voice was shaky. Higher than normal.
“Y’okay?” He asked, his eyebrows pinching together as he watched her work without turning around. “Y’feel okay? Not sore or—”
“Harry,” she swallowed pausing her movements and Cece was suckling on her pacifier watching the pretty woman curiously.
“What, love?” He frowned. “Y’sure you’re alright? Y’sound—”
She put a hand on her face. “Harry, I feel...” she whispered and turned around.
Harry thought she was stunning when she perched over him and slid up and down his cock. But there was nothing like the sight of her, baby on her hip, freshly fucked and flushed, and sleepy looking as she made breakfast in his kitchen. “Y’feel what?” He asked, clearing his throat before he told her he loved her. How quickly he turned into a teenage boy ready to profess his love all because she felt so good around his cock.
“Good,” she smiled sadly. “Really, really good,” she promised. Harry smiled happily. Glad she was feeling okay. “But—”
Fuck. NO.
“I think we shouldn’t have—”
“Kitten, no,” he said quickly crossing the kitchen and putting one hand on her free hip. Cece was gazing at him while her little pacifier bounced up and down in her mouth. “Love, don’t say it—”
“Harry, you employ me.”
His natural instinct was to fire her right on the spot. Then promptly propose to her.
He shoved that instinct into the bottom of his stomach, but his chest ached knowing she was going to be twenty times stronger than him because she had to be. In her head, she was all alone. Even if that wasn’t true at all. He closed his eyes. “Sweetheart,” he said softly. His voice felt broken, and his heartbeat was thudding too hard.
“Harry, I... I really don’t regret that at all. But it was,” she took a deep breath. “It wasn’t the right move,” she looked at his chest. Her face warm with a fresh blush as she probably remembered how he made her come three times in a row. “It was perfect and I like being close with you. But there has to be a line,” she said. “I shouldn’t have crossed it, and I’m sorry. I don’t regret it. Given half the chance, I’d probably do it again,” she admitted.
“We could do it again if—”
“Harry,” she laughed softly, awkwardness coating the sound.
“Angel,” he started but she winced and turned her head away like he had slapped her.
“Please don’t call me that,” she whispered. “That’s the only thing Cody ever called me and—”
“Jesus, kitten, m’sorry. I was jus’—”
“It’s okay,” she looked up briefly, but her face turned another shade darker when their eyes connected. She looked so kissable. He wanted to. Wanted to kiss her and hold her and promise she could have whatever she wanted. Harry didn’t know if she was right. Maybe it wasn’t the best way to do things.
She was employed by him. A lot closer than any other of his employees. Granted he didn’t want to sleep with Niall or give him babies the way he wanted to do for her. “I love Cece,” she reminded him. “I don’t want to jeopardize this because of...” she swallowed. “Because of what we did. We can just forget about it. It was really, really wonderful. Please don’t question that,” her voice was soft. “You’re going to take your leave and I’m going to see my family for a week or two,” she explained. “It’ll be good to have that space and maybe... maybe reset what we’re feeling.”
“Reset,” he repeated.
She nodded. "Isn't there a part of you that wonders if what we did is only because I'm around so much?"
Harry wanted to scream. How could she say that? How could she possibly believe he only made her come three times because she was there? A small voice shouted from the back of his mind: Tell her why! Harry felt his stomach flip and his heart nearly stopped beating.
She didn’t know he loved her. She couldn’t know that his adoration for her had nothing to do with her proximity.
Her innate ability to know what he needed. Organizing papers without asking, folding his laundry, caring for his precious baby.
Just... being there. But not because of space, because it wasn't just because she was present, it was her presence.
No he shook his head. She was scared. She was pushing him away. Scared of all the things she told him the night before. It was her “baggage." The baggage she claimed Harry couldn’t carry because it was so heavy.
But what had he said that made her believe he couldn’t handle it?
Cece doesn’t need a sibling right now.
But she would never want to pressure him to do that—right? Not with what he had been through himself. But then she went and told him all about the way her ex-boyfriend treated her and how it was the only thing she wanted.
I’m just going to get a sperm donor. She said it so casually. There was an expiration date. If Cece turned five before something changed, then she was going to leave.
Harry wanted to give her a million babies. However many she wanted to have, he would give her. He would do it with her. He would quit his job and let her do whatever she wanted. Everything she wanted. A family that adored her and put her first because she deserved it. A family that would travel across the world for her just because they missed her, and she was their favorite thing in the world. A house filled with babies and her pretty maternal self, taking care of them all. Feeding them medicine and making them giggle when they discovered their toes.
He wanted their future children to love her more than him because she deserved that more than anything.
Hell, Cece probably already loved her more than him already.
“Are you going to fire me?” She whispered, pulling him from his thoughts. His hand was holding his shirt wrapped around her body at her hip. The fabric bunched a little tighter than it was before. He released it.
“No, of course not,” he rolled his eyes.
But he was going to make her fall in love with him.
The sooner the better.
--
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bunnys-kisses · 2 days
Text
boxers
simon 'ghost' riley
cw: smut/pwp, boxing au, boxer!simon, injury/bruises, protective!simon, size difference, unprotected sex, cowgirl position, gentle sex, simon luvs his missus,
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you liked strong men. strong however was a broad definition. thought a man could be strong in a lot of ways, not just physical. strong convictions, strong emotionally, there were many examples.
but when you started seeing simon, you were enthralled by his physical strength. he wasn't some eight pack having, dehydrated mess. he was bulky, which was good for what he did.
punch the living daylights out of other boxers.
wide shoulders, a softness in his stomach, strong arms with one lined with tattoos. not to mention those thighs, he could crush a watermelon with them if you asked nicely (no, he wasn't going to crush your head). the facial scars add a scary look as did those dark eyes of his.
despite it, simon was a total sap.
at least to you, no one else. god forbid johnny or any of the others. but when it was just the two of you, he was a big puppy. you once described him as a huge german shepherd who thought he was a lap dog.
simon simply said, "just be glad i don't wanna sit on your lap, love. i'll break ya." then pulled you to him to give you a kiss on the forehead. he'd never hurt you though, he'd rather take his own life than yours.
and you loved him back, even with his loud snoring, you still adored him. you thought that he was the perfect boyfriend. which was why it hurt so much when he came home late at night with bruises on his face.
"si."
he dropped his bag and let you get in his arms. he kissed the top of your head lovingly. and welcomed your embrace. the man had enough fractures and scars. so to see another shiny bruise only left you feeling sad.
you brought him to the kitchen by his hand and sat him down at the kitchen table. he looked so large in the small space, which really highlighted your size difference.
"c'mon, pretty thing." he said as held out his arms to you.
you looked over your shoulder from the freezer, "give me a second, honey. i need to find the frozen peas."
simon groaned. he wanted to touch his woman. he cursed the universe that the frozen peas were in the back of the freezer. you managed to grab the bag before you turned to your boyfriend.
you sat in his lap and pressed the frozen vegetable to his bruised face, "poor baby." you cooed as you gave the bag to him.
he hissed a little at the feeling of it against the heat of the bruise. you rested your head on top of his and held him close to your chest
"do i need to talk to anyone?"
he chuckled, "no, love. i just need you right now. i wanna feel my woman." he nuzzled up against your chest. he even kissed the little gold chain around your neck.
eventually the peas started to melt and you put them back in the freezer. however with your back turned to your lover, you didn't notice his approach towards you.
he cornered you against the fridge with his large, scarred hands on your hips. he let out a shudder, "i need you." his voice sounded a little strained.
you swallowed as you kept your hands on the front of the fridge. you could feel his cock pressed against your ass. the rush was the fight was wearing off, but he needed another release.
"you could've just asked, riley."
he curved his back over you to lean in to kiss your neck. his hands traveled north to your breasts and groped them. the flesh filled his hands, his grip was a little rough. but, you didn't mind that.
"i know, love. but i couldn't find the words. i just needed you." his voice was like driving over gravel. it left you hot all over.
you blushed a bit at his words. you turned so you front was facing him. you took his face in your hands and brought him in to kiss his bruise. you said, "si-"
"please." he said as he curled an arm around you middle and brought you closer to him. your hands were splayed across his broad chest. he pulled you into a kiss and you had to get on your tip-toes to meet his lips.
he held you by your middle, his strong arms draped around your waist. he groaned against the kiss, "mine." his voice was as light as it could be.
you really had no choice. it was either you fucked on the bed or up against the fridge. and you knew the landlord would not want to deal with that. so you got out of your boxer boyfriend's grasp and took him by the hand. then you practically dragged him to your shared bedroom.
his eyes were on you as you walked. he felt his cock stir in his pants. you were just so good to him. you were the perfect girl for him. it made him smirk to himself even if it did hurt a little.
he watched your beautiful body on display for him as you tugged off the oversized shirt (that belonged to simon) and baggy sweatpants (that were yours, because his were two sizes too big!). he put his hands on your hips, feeling the softness under his finger tips.
he leaned in a down at you and kissed your cheek. he squeezed your hips and groaned against you, "pretty girl." you trailed your fingers through his blond hair.
your core throbbed for him, your heart leapt when he got a better grip on you and almost tossed you onto the bed. you bounced a little and laughed. "simon! no need!"
"i need ya love, you were takin' too long." he quickly got his shirt off. he hit his nose in the hustle of it all, but was too wrapped up in his deep lust for you that he didn't even wince at the pain, "c'mon, love. either you get them off, or i'm rippin' em of!"
usually he liked to slowly take off your bra and panties, but tonight was an inferno. a huge fire that burned in his core. his heart thumped as he go the buckle of his belt off and he slid the leather off from his waist. he watched you hastily get your underwear off and laid underneath him.
"i wanna see my girl on top." he said as he leaned in for a searing kiss and grabbed you to put you on top of him while he laid on the bed. you were both naked, two pieces of the same puzzle.
you moved so your pussy brushed up against him. he let out a choked groan as you didn't fully sink down him. he could feel his heart up into his throat.
it should be illegal for you to do that, and punishment for it is to get dicked down for five hours.
"like that, si?"
"if i wasn't so worry about breakin' ya, you'd already be ridin' it." he loved when you were on top. the sight of your eyes on him as you hold onto him for a leverage as you rode him.
"si." you smiled as you splayed your hands on his chest and sank down onto his cock. you could feel your heart in your throat as you sank yourself down on his impressive size. you choked out a moan and felt the pleasure pollute your head.
"that's it, baby girl." he said softly. his voice was a rumble in the back of your head like thunder. he guided your hips. he wanted to see close to his missus.
your big scary boyfriend. close to being the number one fighter in the league. the big shot. the ghost. there he laid under you, his eyes closed and his body melting into the bed. his hands your hips as he slowly guided them up and down. your cunt felt like a comfortable vice around him, he could hear the hitch in your breathing when he hit just the right spot.
what a beauty, the most loveliest woman he had ever laid his eyes on. that's why you were his woman, the only one he wanted. through hell and high water, to the moon and back. he kept his hand steady on your waist as you moved up and down on his cock.
you could hear your heart thumping in your ears from the blood rush of having sex with him. the most handsome man you ever had the privilege of loving. you held onto him for support as you raised and lowered your hips against pelvis.
you felt the curl of pleasure in your gut as his cock prodded at your most intimate parts. he felt so right. that was your man, as you leaned in and kissed him on the lips, you felt the inferno in your gut.
you felt hot and heavy all over, you felt the rush of pleasure echo through your body as you moved against him. he was your simon, the bloodied boxer, the ghost of the ring. he came home to you every night, he kissed you until you fell asleep in his arms, he brought you home flowers on tuesdays and always cooked dinner on sundays.
that was your charming bloke who punched people for a living. with his scars on his cheeks and lips, the crookedness of his nose, those piercing brown eyes and all the love he could give you. while he didn't believe it was much, it was more than you ever wanted.
"si"
"love."
you pulled him in for another hot kiss as you bounced more on his cock. the stabbing of his cock in you made you feel lightheaded, there was so much to fit in you. everything about simon felt big, from the meat on his shoulders to the width of them. his strong arms that were now wrapped around your middle, to of course his cock that was filling any gap in your pussy.
you dug your nails into his tanned skin and you let out a loud moan as simon clutched onto you and continued to push his cock up into you. it made you see stars as he moved.
"that's my woman." he huffed, "bright beauty." his voice drew as he bounced you on his cock. even if the pain in his face was still there, the sight and feeling of you around his cock managed to dull the pain. who thought pussy was a good cure for a bruise.
he pulled you closer to him, until your chest was against his. simon bent his knees and got a different angle to hit the back of your soaked cunt, "been thinkin' about my missus all evening. probably why my game got thrown off. was thinkin' about this sweet treat rather than johnny's punches." he chuckled as he managed to fuck you faster.
you whined, you didn't want to be the cause of simon getting hurt. but he quieted you down with a searing kiss. he didn't need to hear that, he wanted to hear your pussy getting fucked by him.
the angle made your head a little dizzy as you tried to keep some more of control. but it was too late, simon had already dominated your little pussy yet again. it was alright though, the feeling left shivers through your body.
he continued to make out with you, the kisses were sloppy and needy. it made your cunt ache as he rocked into you. the bed shifted under you two as you continued to make love.
simon loved you. he'd never hurt a hair on your head, even a chipped nail was a cause of concern for him. he kissed at you hot face as he felt you grow tense around him.
a few hard thrusts later and you were clamping down on him, orgasm pulled from you and you felt hot all over. the pleasure left your head swimming. you panted wildly as he continued to move against you.
he gave you filthy praise as he felt his own orgasm come over him. with a heavy thrust into you, he slammed his cock all the way into you and finished. spurts of cum hit the inside of your pussy and he left out a harsh grunt.
he dropped his arms down onto the bed and laid fully out. you clung to him and his cum clung to your pussy lips. you both laid there, basking in each other's embrace.
you leaned up and kissed him gently on his bruise, "my boxer." your fingers dragged down his chest, "you have to be careful. i hate when my man gets hurt." you kissed him on the cheek under the bruise, "i need you to come back to me in one piece."
simon's cock soon slipped out of your pussy and you softly kissed him on the lips. he said to you between kisses, "i always come home to my love. i love you so much." his words were like honey that melted to your core.
you laid in each other's hold. he had been a fighter all his life, but now he was simply yours. wrapped up in the comforts of bed, the bruises would heal but your love for him would be eternal. <3
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f14fun · 2 days
Text
lay all your love on me - op81 (C2)
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synopsis: in which oscar piastri and a university student begging for her euro summer vacation collide in a steamy, abba-inspired romance
prose (6.1K words) ✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩ profile | masterlist | series index ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆
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02: Love, Sweat, and Secondhand Embarrassment
"Clemmy I swear I wanted to die that entire time. Whoever I offended in an alternate universe I am so so sorry, I truly believe karma is real now," I lamented, voice weak.
Burying my head in my pillow, I could finally appreciate the cool blast of AC (well, it was a little bit of air conditioning but a little is better than nothing) I scratched my right leg that was hoisted up onto the blue duvet cover. If not for the horrible comedic timing of everything, in that moment, I might have said that I was enjoying myself.
On the other line of the phone, thousands of miles away, it was a completely different story.
"What the fuck," Clementine could barely muster out because she was laughing so hard.
"I still don't think any part of this story is funny, Clem," I roll my eyes and trail off.
"But it is! You genuinely should consider a career in stand-up comedy. If you recounted all of this in front of a paying live audience, I'm just saying it could make you a millionaire overnight," Clementine wheezed.
"Oh, shut up, bitch," I retorted, trying to suppress a smile despite my mortification.
"You know it's true though!" Her girlish giggles rang through my room. I could see her face through the screen and it looked like visible tears were streaming down her face from how funny she found this to be.
"I am completely and utterly humiliated. There is no way I can go downstairs and face everyone right now," I whined. It was true, as twenty minutes ago, mid-Facetime with Clementine, I heard the door to the foyer open and heard a lot of new noises.
New people. The neighbors. The rest of the Australians.
Crikey, mate.
There was no way I could face them. And since Oscar was probably their son (he looked way too young to be a father) he had probably already told them about the wretched and humiliating mishap.
"Seriously, Clemmy, you don’t get it," I said, trying to keep the frustration out of my voice but failing miserably. "This is not just some embarrassing story. This is my life, and I have to face these people now."
Clementine’s laughter finally started to subside, and she took a deep breath. "Okay, okay, I get it. But you have to admit, this is a once-in-a-lifetime kind of disaster. You can’t just ignore it. It’s like the universe is telling you to embrace the chaos."
I sighed, feeling a bit more grounded with her calming tone. "Yeah, well, I’m not exactly feeling the universe’s love right now. I feel like I’ve been dropped into some kind of sitcom. And what if they think I’m a total klutz? I can’t even begin to imagine how Oscar must’ve described me."
"It'll be fine. You are a pro at handling horrible situations. I mean, I can really only think that you have had more bad experiences with guys than good ones!" Clem tried to reassure me.
"Wow, thanks," I deadpanned. "Way to make a girl feel special."
Clementine's voice was full of playful sympathy. "Hey, I’m just saying, you’ve survived everything life’s thrown at you so far. Besides, look at it this way: if they’re judging you based on this one incident, they’re missing out on getting to know the amazing person you are."
"Yeah, because nothing says 'amazing' like face-planting into a pile of shampoo and knocking over a bunch of cleaning supplies," I said, sarcasm dripping from my tone.
Clementine laughed. "Exactly! And let’s be honest, if they do judge you for this, they’re definitely not worth your time. Besides, Oscar might even think you’re charming in a clumsy, endearing kind of way. You never know."
"You should really consider a career in therapy. If I lay here and close my eyes for a bit and sleep for three hours surely your advice will work," I retorted.
"Oh be so serious with me now,"
"I am! Now I can add a new skill to my LinkedIn profile," I said, trying to stifle a giggle. "How about 'Expert in Catastrophic Bathroom Mishaps: Master of Turning Shower Encounters into Slapstick Comedy'?"
Clementine burst into laughter. “That’s quite a title! It’s like you’ve got a whole new niche market for yourself.”
“Right? I’m just waiting for the endorsement from ‘The Association of Embarrassing Bathroom Incidents,’” I said, imagining a badge with that exact title. What a big, fat, fucking joke.
“Or maybe you'll become the keynote speaker for the 'International Conference on Unexpected Water-Based Accidents,’” Clementine added, her voice full of amusement.
“I’ll make sure to include a workshop on ‘How to Survive a Bathroom Collision with Dignity and Humor,’” I said with a chuckle. “And don’t forget the seminar on ‘Turning Slip-and-Fall Disasters into Networking Opportunities.’”
“A career to consider!” Clementine laughed. “And you know what? I’ll be your first fan. Just remember to keep me updated on how your new ‘disastrous bathroom mishap’ career is going.”
“I’ll make sure to do that,” I promised with a smile. “Thanks for the laugh. It’s nice to know that even in the middle of a fiasco, I can count on you to turn it into a comedy show.”
"What can I say, I will never turn down listening to a free shit show," Clementine winked at me through the camera.
"Clem! What the hell!" I waved my manicured pointed nail at her.
"Bye! Don't die from embarrassment before you come back!" She quipped, then promptly hung up.
I lay sprawled on my bed, dreading the thought of going downstairs and facing the group of new neighbors. The whole idea made me cringe. I was just about to mentally prepare myself for the awkward introductions when a sudden knock on my door jolted me upright. My heart raced as I called out lazily, “Come in.”
The door creaked open, and I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw Oscar standing there. His eyebrow was raised, and he wore a cheeky grin that did nothing to ease my nerves.
"Well, well, well," he said with an amused smirk. "Looks like you’ve been having quite the chat with 'dearest Clemmy,' haven’t you?"
My face flushed beet red, and I stuttered, struggling to find my words. “W-What are you doing here?”
Oscar leaned casually against the doorframe, clearly enjoying my discomfort. “Oh, you know, just overheard you and Clemmy talking about our little mishap. I believe you mentioned something about me being ‘a charming yet infuriating Aussie who managed to turn your bathroom break into a comedy skit.’”
I blinked, stunned into silence. My mouth opened and closed, but no coherent words came out. The sheer embarrassment was overwhelming. Oscar’s casual demeanor and his cheeky grin only made things worse.
“What can I say, my name was called,” Oscar continued with a mischievous glint in his eye. “If someone keeps calling you hot, I mean, wouldn’t you be too curious to listen?”
His smirk only made my breath hitch and my fingers tremble a little more. I could feel my cheeks burning, and I struggled to come up with a response. The playful glint in his eye and his casual attitude did nothing to alleviate my embarrassment. Instead, they only made me feel more flustered.
I took a deep breath, trying to regain some semblance of composure. “W-Well, I guess I didn’t think anyone would be actually listening.”
Oscar raised an eyebrow playfully, his smirk widening. “Oh, I’m sure you didn’t. But it was too good to pass up. Especially the part where you called me a ‘human wrecking ball.’”
My face flushed a deeper shade of crimson. “Great. Just great,” I muttered, shifting uncomfortably. “I’m sure I’ve made a fantastic first impression.”
Oscar chuckled, leaning casually against the doorframe. “Look, it’s all good. I’ve seen worse first impressions. Trust me. At least you didn’t accidentally set off the fire alarm or flood the place.”
I managed a weak smile, still feeling the sting of embarrassment. “Yeah, well, I’ll try to keep any future disasters to a minimum.”
Look at me, constantly embarrassing myself in front of hot guys. This was the exact reason why I was still bitchless and socially awkward at the ripe age of twenty-one. I could navigate a spreadsheet like a pro, ace exams, and even master the perfect contour, but put me in a room with a cute guy, and I turned into a walking calamity.
I sighed internally, already dreading the inevitable teasing I’d get from Clemmy once she found out I had, yet again, failed to keep my cool around a guy. Maybe I should’ve just stayed in the bathroom and let the ground swallow me whole.
Oscar raised an eyebrow, studying me with a curious look. “You know, you seem like a completely different person right now. Way quieter, more shy… less daring.”
My face flushed with a mix of irritation and embarrassment. “That’s not true,” I snapped, crossing my arms defensively. “I’m exactly the same as I was before.”
Oscar’s grin widened, clearly enjoying the effect his words had on me. “Sure, if you say so. But the girl who almost took me down like a rugby player in the bathroom seemed a lot more fearless.”
My nose flared as I shot him a glare, feeling the fire of indignation rise within me. Who did he think he was, making assumptions about me? I’ll show him just how brave I can be, I thought, my fists clenching. If he wanted to see daring, then I’d make sure he regretted ever doubting me. The nerve of this guy! He might have been hot, but that didn’t give him the right to push my buttons like this.
Oscar gave me a lopsided grin, clearly pleased with himself. "Anyway, everyone’s heading downstairs to meet each other. Figured I’d let you know, since, you know, it’s probably not the best idea to hide out up here forever."
My stomach twisted with nerves at the thought of facing everyone after that humiliating encounter. The idea of meeting new people while still reeling from my disastrous introduction to Oscar was daunting. But there was no way I was going to let him see how nervous I actually was. I took a deep breath, nodding stiffly. "Fine, let’s get this over with."
As we walked out of the room and toward the stairs, I could feel Oscar’s presence behind me—large, imposing, and annoyingly close. My face heated up, and I silently cursed myself for blushing yet again. Why did this guy have to make everything so difficult?
It was like shooting a sitting duck. A little small talk, a smile, and baby, I was stuck. I was a grown woman, for god’s sake, not some teenager swooning over a crush. But there I was, getting flustered over a guy I barely knew. Get a grip, I told myself, trying to shake off the absurdity of the situation. This wasn’t supposed to happen—I wasn’t supposed to be this easily charmed.
When we reached the bottom of the stairs, I hesitated, gripping the railing a little longer than usual. I could feel Oscar’s gaze on me, and it only made my nerves worse. Just as I was about to take the first step down, his hand brushed against mine. The contact was brief but enough to send a jolt of awareness through me. His hand was rough with calluses, moderately enveloping mine in a way that felt both comforting and disarming.
What was it about this guy that made me feel so uncharacteristically off-balance? As I tried to steady my racing thoughts, I reminded myself that I had to keep it together. After all, I wasn’t about to let some smooth-talking Aussie turn me into a lovesick fool—no matter how much my traitorous heart seemed to enjoy the challenge.
As I reached the bottom of the stairs, my eyes were drawn to two adults who were deep in conversation with my mom. Their warm, friendly demeanor and unmistakable Australian accents told me they were Oscar’s parents. They seemed just as lively and outgoing as he was, which only added to the strangeness of this entire situation.
Then, I spotted Oscar’s siblings—a trio of sisters who looked like carbon copies of him, yet each had her own distinct vibe, like different fonts of the same typeface. They were laughing and joking with each other, their bond evident in the way they effortlessly engaged in light-hearted banter. I felt a pang of envy, wishing I had siblings to share that kind of closeness with.
My daydream was abruptly shattered when Oscar’s large, warm hand clasped onto my shoulder, his fingers pressing gently but firmly against my skin. The unexpected touch sent a jolt through me, making me jump slightly as a flush of heat rushed to my cheeks. His chuckle, deep and amused, rumbled behind me, the sound wrapping around me like a teasing caress. He was standing on the step just above me, close enough that I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. His presence was unmistakably felt—broad, solid, and way too close for comfort, yet somehow not close enough.
His fingers lingered on my shoulder, almost as if he was testing my reaction, and I could feel the warmth radiating from his touch, seeping into my skin. The space between us seemed to shrink with every passing second, and I could barely concentrate on anything but the weight of his hand and the steady beat of my heart hammering in my chest.
Oscar leaned in slightly, his voice low and smooth as honey. “Jumpier than I thought,” he drawled, his tone dripping with playful mischief. “Didn’t take you for the shy type. Especially not after our little bathroom tango.” His grin widened, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a way that was both infuriating and ridiculously charming.
My pulse quickened at the way he was looking at me—those eyes sparkling with amusement, as if he knew exactly what he was doing. I swallowed hard, my mind racing to come up with a retort, but all I could focus on was how his hand, still resting on my shoulder, felt both protective and possessive. The air between us crackled with a tension that was impossible to ignore, and I had to remind myself to breathe.
I could quite literally cut the sexual tension with the dullest fucking butterknife in the world.
I tried to muster a sharp retort, something that would wipe that smug grin off his face, but my brain was too busy short-circuiting to cooperate. All I could manage was a stuttered, “I-I’m not shy! You just—caught me off guard, that’s all.” The words tumbled out, weak and unconvincing, and I mentally cringed at how feeble they sounded.
Oscar’s grin only grew, clearly enjoying my flustered state. He leaned in a little closer, his gaze locked on mine with a playful intensity that made my heart skip a beat. “Off guard, huh?” he murmured, his voice dipping lower. “So, you’re saying if I hadn’t surprised you, you’d be able to keep up?”
I opened my mouth to respond, determined to regain some semblance of dignity, but nothing clever came out. Instead, I just stood there, caught between wanting to pull away from his teasing and feeling inexplicably drawn to his warmth. His hand slid from my shoulder, and the absence of his touch left a surprising chill in its wake.
Realizing that my window for a comeback was closing, I finally managed to sputter, “Y-Yeah, exactly.” I immediately cursed myself for sounding so pathetic. Not exactly the sharp comeback I was hoping for. His smirk deepened, and I could tell he wasn’t buying it for a second.
“Sure, whatever you say,” Oscar replied, his tone still dripping with amusement. He straightened up, giving me a quick wink before stepping down to the next stair. The playful glint in his eyes told me he knew exactly how much he was getting under my skin, and he was loving every second of it.
As he moved past me, I finally found my voice—too little, too late—and muttered under my breath, “Cocky bastard.” But it was quiet enough that I hoped he didn’t hear it. To my dismay, Oscar paused, turning back with a raised eyebrow and an even wider grin.
“Sorry, didn’t catch that,” he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Care to repeat it?”
My cheeks flamed as I quickly shook my head. “Nope, nothing. Let’s just… go meet everyone.”
Oscar’s grin didn’t falter as he took a step closer, still looming above me. “You know,” he began, his voice casual but with that familiar teasing edge, “I’ve already met everyone else. Your mom, too. And I’ve gotta say, you two seem like complete opposites.”
I blinked up at him, caught off guard again. “Opposites?”
He nodded, leaning against the wall with that effortless ease he seemed to have perfected. “Yep. Your mom’s all smiles and warm welcomes. You, on the other hand… well, you’ve got this whole ‘ready to throw punches’ vibe going on.”
I narrowed my eyes at him, trying to gauge whether he was being serious or just messing with me again. “I do not have a ‘ready to throw punches’ vibe.”
Oscar’s lips twitched like he was holding back a laugh. “Oh, you totally do. But don’t worry,” he added with a playful smirk, “it’s kind of endearing. Keeps things interesting.”
I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest. “Glad to know I’m so entertaining for you.”
He shrugged, unfazed. “Hey, I’m just saying, opposites attract, right? Besides, your mom already likes me. You could take a few notes.”
His comment sent a fresh wave of warmth to my cheeks, both from irritation and something I couldn’t quite place. “I don’t need notes from you,” I shot back, though my voice lacked its usual bite.
Oscar just chuckled, giving me one last teasing wink before turning to head down the stairs. “Whatever you say, mate. Just try not to tackle anyone else while you’re at it.”
"Well well well, what do we have here?" A girl with short hair and a devious grin matching Oscar's grinned at me as well entered the kitchen. Shimmering her hands like "jazz hands", she rolled her eyes and rested her chin in the palm of her hand.
I turned to face the new arrival, immediately recognizing her as one of Oscar’s sisters—one of the three siblings who seemed to share his penchant for mischief. Her cropped hair and sharp, playful eyes made her look like she’d just stepped out of a rom-com where she was the resident troublemaker, always stirring the pot and having a laugh at everyone else’s expense.
“Hey, party people,” she said, her voice dripping with a teasing lilt. She shot me a grin that was almost a mirror image of Oscar’s, mischievous and knowing, like she was in on some inside joke I hadn’t been let in on yet. I could feel the same heat from before creeping up my neck. Why did it feel like these siblings were reading me like an open book?
“Looks like someone’s already made a grand entrance,” she continued, flicking her eyes between me and Oscar with an amused smirk. “Oscar’s been talking about you nonstop since we got here. Said something about a ‘bathroom fiasco’ that deserves an award?”
I shot a glare at Oscar, who was leaning casually against the counter, looking far too pleased with himself. “Did he now?” I said, trying to keep my voice steady despite the mortification clawing at me.
The girl laughed, light and musical, but with an edge that told me she was fully enjoying every bit of this. “Oh yeah, he’s been filling us in. But don’t worry, we’re used to his tall tales. I’m Hattie, by the way,” she added, extending a hand with exaggerated enthusiasm as if we were meeting on the set of a game show rather than in my kitchen.
I hesitated for a beat before shaking her hand, trying to muster a smile that didn’t look too forced. “Nice to meet you, Hattie. I’m—”
“Oh, I know who you are,” she interrupted, her grin widening. “You’re the girl who almost took out my brother. Honestly, I’m impressed. No one’s ever managed to knock him off his game quite like that.”
I glanced at Oscar, who was watching the exchange with an infuriatingly smug look on his face. Maisie’s comment hung in the air, both a compliment and a lighthearted jab. I couldn’t help but feel like I was once again the butt of some inside joke between the siblings.
“Yeah, well, it’s a special talent of mine,” I said, trying to sound casual but feeling like every word was being scrutinized. “Guess I just have that effect.”
Hattie laughed, the sound bright and unapologetically amused. “Oh, I like you already. But hey, if you’re gonna hang out with us, you better be ready for a little friendly chaos. And maybe a few more unexpected collisions.”
Oscar gave a soft snort of laughter, and I could feel his eyes still on me, assessing, teasing, and—annoyingly—almost impressed. I tried to ignore the butterflies that seemed to be staging a full-on rebellion in my stomach. Clearly, this family thrived on playful torment, and I had somehow found myself right in the middle of it.
“Don’t worry,” I said, straightening up and forcing a confident smile. “I think I can handle whatever you guys throw at me.”
Hattie's eyes sparkled with mischief, and she gave me a mock salute. “That’s the spirit. Welcome to the chaos, mate.”
Oscar chuckled again, giving me that damn wink before pushing off from the counter. “Oh, she’s ready for it. Trust me, she’s already made quite the impression.”
The other two girls strolled in, each with their own distinct energy that filled the room. One had a fierce, confident look, dark hair tied up in a messy bun, and a leather jacket that screamed ‘cooler-than-you’ vibes. The youngest, a curly-haired, bright-eyed whirlwind, practically bounced into the kitchen, her infectious smile lighting up the space.
“So,” I said, feeling slightly overwhelmed by the sudden influx of new faces. “I’ve met Oscar, obviously, and… Hattie, right?” I glanced at the girl who had first greeted me, who nodded with a playful smile. “But I’m afraid I haven’t gotten your names yet,” I continued, pointing between the other two sisters.
The girl with the leather jacket gave me a wry grin, leaning casually against the counter. “I’m Edie,” she said, her voice dripping with casual confidence. “The cooler, smarter middle child.”
Mae, the youngest, immediately chimed in, rolling her eyes at her sister. “And I’m Mae, the fun one,” she said with a giggle, her curls bouncing as she hopped up onto a stool. “Edie’s just mad she wasn’t born with my charm.”
Edie snorted, pretending to be offended. “Please, you’re like a tiny tornado of chaos. But yeah, I guess she’s not wrong,” she added, shooting me a smirk. “Mae’s got a way of making everything a little… livelier.”
I couldn’t help but smile at their playful back-and-forth. “Nice to officially meet you all. And thanks for the heads-up on your brother’s antics,” I said, glancing at Oscar, who was watching the exchange with an amused glint in his eye.
“Oh, trust me,” Hattie added, her grin widening as she nudged Oscar with her elbow. “We’ve got years of experience keeping this one in line. You’re welcome to join the effort.”
Oscar threw his hands up in mock surrender. “Wow, ganging up on me already? This is why I never bring girls home,” he joked, though there was a hint of genuine warmth in his voice, like he was more than used to—and secretly enjoyed—their teasing.
Mae leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Just wait till we start telling you all the embarrassing stories. Oscar’s got quite a few, and we’ve got no problem spilling the tea.”
Oscar smirked, shifting his weight just enough to close the distance between us, his presence suddenly feeling a lot closer, a lot warmer. He leaned in with a casual ease, his movements smooth and unhurried, as if he had all the time in the world to make me squirm. His voice dropped into a playful, low tone, rich and velvety, each word dripping with deliberate charm. “Oh, don’t worry about them,” he murmured, his gaze locked onto mine with an intensity that made my heart skip a beat. “I’d much rather hear your stories. You’re far more interesting than anything they could say about me.”
The way he looked at me was like I was the only person in the room, his eyes lingering on mine with a bold, flirtatious glint that sent a shiver down my spine. His grin was maddeningly confident, a little crooked, and devastatingly irresistible—the kind of smile that made it clear he knew exactly what he was doing. It was teasing, suggestive, and far too charming for its own good, like he was daring me to blush, daring me to react.
I felt the heat creeping up my neck, a slow burn that spread across my cheeks, making my skin prickle with the sudden awareness of how close he was. My mind scrambled for something clever to say, but his flirtatious tone, the way his eyes roved over my face as if he was reading every reaction, left me tongue-tied. It was like he was peeling back layers with just a look, searching for the part of me that he could fluster with a few well-placed words and that infuriating smile.
I tried to steady my breath, but his proximity was overwhelming. I could catch the faint scent of his cologne—fresh, with a hint of something spicy—and the subtle shift of his body as he leaned closer sent my senses into overdrive. Every nerve seemed to hum in response to his nearness, and I could feel my face burning hotter, betraying me with every second that I failed to look away.
Edie made a gagging noise, rolling her eyes dramatically. “Ew, Oscar, seriously? Can you not flirt for like five seconds? It’s embarrassing.”
Mae giggled, giving Oscar a playful shove. “Yeah, gross. No one wants to see that. Save it for when we’re not around, Romeo.”
Hattie snorted, shaking her head as she watched Oscar with a mix of amusement and exasperation. “He’s always like this. Thinks he’s Mr. Smooth. Don’t let him get to you.”
But Oscar only chuckled, clearly unfazed by his sisters’ teasing. He turned back to me, his grin widening as he caught sight of my flushed cheeks. “Aww, look at that,” he said, his voice soft and teasing. “Did I make you blush? How cute.”
I quickly tried to hide my face, mortification bubbling up as I realized there was no escaping the heat radiating from my cheeks. “N-No, you didn’t,” I stammered, though the pink tint on my face said otherwise.
Oscar’s smirk deepened, and he leaned in just a little closer, his voice barely above a whisper. “You’re not very good at hiding it, you know. It’s kind of endearing.”
I could practically feel my cheeks getting even more red, if that was even possible. His sisters snickered behind us, enjoying the show as much as they enjoyed tormenting him.
Mae nudged Hattie, whispering loud enough for everyone to hear, “He’s really laying it on thick, huh? Someone needs to put a leash on this one.”
Hattie snickered and turned to me, giving me an exaggeratedly sympathetic look. “Don’t worry, he does this to everyone. It’s part of his ‘charm offensive.’ Just don’t let him get away with it too easily.”
“Yeah, make him work for it,” Edie added with a laugh. “And don’t let that blush fool you. He’s got enough of an ego without you feeding it.”
Oscar just shrugged, clearly unbothered by his sisters’ ribbing. He kept his eyes on me, his smile softening just slightly. “They’re just jealous because they know I’m right. You really are something else.”
I rolled my eyes, trying to fight the smile that was creeping onto my face despite my best efforts. “You’re impossible,” I muttered, crossing my arms in an attempt to compose myself.
Oscar leaned back, finally giving me a bit of space but not without one last wink. “Impossible’s my specialty,” he said, the playful challenge hanging in the air.
Hattie clapped her hands together, breaking the charged silence that had wrapped around us. “Alright, lovebirds, let’s change the scene before this kitchen gets any steamier,” she said with a sly grin, glancing between Oscar and me. “What do you say we all head out to the pool? It’s hot as hell today, and I could use a swim.”
Mae’s eyes lit up at the suggestion, and she bounced on her toes with excitement. “Yes, please! I’ve been dying to jump in all morning. Come on, it’ll be fun.”
Edie shrugged, pushing off the counter. “Sounds like a plan. Beats sitting around here watching Oscar make a fool of himself,” she said, shooting her brother a pointed look that he brushed off with a careless smirk.
I hesitated, caught off guard by the sudden change in plans. The thought of the pool—cool water, bright sun, and lounging with these new, vibrant personalities—was tempting, but my mind immediately jumped to what that would mean: changing into a bikini, being under the sun's scrutiny, and, worse, the idea of Oscar’s eyes on me again, but this time with even less to hide behind.
“Uh, yeah, sure,” I said, trying to sound casual, though my heart was starting to race for an entirely different reason now. “Just give me a minute to get changed.”
As I slipped back into my room, I rummaged through my suitcase, finding the bright bikini I had packed on a whim but hadn’t quite planned on wearing in front of a whole audience of strangers. It was a pretty number—a little more revealing than I was used to—but suddenly, the idea of wearing it around Oscar felt daunting. My insecurities bubbled up: the nagging thoughts of whether my stomach was flat enough, if my thighs looked alright, or if the faint stretch marks I tried so hard to ignore would be too noticeable under the bright afternoon sun.
I took a deep breath, staring at my reflection in the mirror. I tugged at the fabric, trying to adjust it in a way that made me feel more comfortable, but the nerves wouldn’t settle. I could already imagine Oscar’s eyes lingering on me, his playful smirk turning into something more appraising, and the thought sent a rush of heat to my cheeks. God, why was I letting this get to me? It was just a pool. Just a bikini. Just Oscar. But the more I tried to rationalize, the more those little fears crept in, whispering doubts that made my stomach churn.
I was so lost in my own thoughts, adjusting and readjusting the strings and trying to silence the negative self-talk, that I nearly jumped out of my skin when a sudden knock rattled my door. My heart leaped into my throat, and I spun around, my breath catching as I called out, “W-Who is it?”
“It’s me,” came Oscar’s familiar voice, muffled but still clear enough to send a jolt of nerves through me. “Just checking to see if you’re alright in there. You’ve been quiet, and, well, didn’t want you chickening out on us.”
His tone was light, but there was something softer in it, something that caught me off guard. It wasn’t the usual teasing or the cocky one-liners I’d grown accustomed to in the short time I’d known him. This felt… genuine. A flicker of concern threaded through his words, almost like he actually cared if I was okay. My cheeks flushed anew, this time from the unexpected warmth of his attention rather than embarrassment.
I sat on the edge of the bed, my fingers fidgeting with the hem of my cover-up as I tried to piece together my swirling thoughts. Was this the same Oscar who had been smirking at me in the kitchen, flirting shamelessly in front of his sisters? The same Oscar who seemed to relish every moment he made me blush or stumble over my words? It was strange, almost disarming, to hear him like this—concerned, attentive, with none of his usual bravado.
My heart fluttered at the thought. What if there was more to him than just the cheeky guy who lived for teasing? I couldn’t help but feel a small, unexpected tug in my chest, an urge to believe that this side of him was real and not just some act. But then, just as quickly, my rational side kicked in, reminding me that I’d known Oscar for all of three hours, most of which had been spent flustered and caught up in his whirlwind of charm.
Was I reading too much into this? Was I letting my own insecurities and wishful thinking color my perception of him? It was hard not to, especially when he swung so easily between flirty and sincere, keeping me constantly off-balance. I barely knew this guy, yet here I was, letting my mind wander into dangerous territory, imagining depth and sincerity that might not even be there.
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to steady my thoughts. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions—didn’t want to let a few kind words make me think I’d seen some hidden side of him. But it was hard not to feel flustered when his voice had softened like that, when he’d taken the time to check on me instead of just joking about how long I was taking.
The knock on my door, the concern in his tone—it all felt so different from the playful Oscar who’d swaggered into my life just a few hours ago. Maybe it was nothing, just a moment of decency, a brief glimpse of something real behind the jokes and teasing. Or maybe I was just overthinking, desperate to see something more in him because he’d managed to get under my skin in a way I wasn’t quite prepared for.
I sighed, feeling my cheeks heat up once more as the realization hit me—I was blushing again, and not just from embarrassment this time. There was something about Oscar, something that made me want to believe he was more than the carefree charmer he projected. But whether that was true or just wishful thinking, I couldn’t be sure. Not yet.
“I-I’m fine!” I called back, trying to steady my voice, but it came out shaky, betraying the mix of anxiety and embarrassment that had settled in my chest. “Just… getting ready.”
There was a pause on the other side of the door, long enough that I thought he might have walked away. But then, Oscar’s voice cut through again, softer this time, and with a teasing edge. “You sure? I promise no one’s gonna judge you out there. Least of all me.”
The reassurance felt sincere, but I couldn’t help the way my mind raced with all the what-ifs. What if he did look? What if I didn’t look good enough? What if this stupid bikini made me feel more exposed than I could handle? I glanced at myself one last time in the mirror, trying to summon the confidence that I usually wore so easily, but right now felt like it was hiding somewhere I couldn’t reach.
“Yeah, I’m sure,” I finally managed, forcing a smile I hoped he couldn’t hear through the door. “Just... give me a sec. I’ll be right out.”
“Take your time,” Oscar said, his voice fading as he finally moved away from the door. “But don’t take too long. You don’t wanna miss the fun.”
As his footsteps retreated, I let out a shaky breath, trying to collect myself. I ran a hand through my hair, giving myself one last pep talk before heading out. It was just a pool day, I reminded myself. Just a stupid pool day with some new people and a guy who was way too good at making me blush. And maybe, just maybe, it would be fun—if I could get out of my own head long enough to let it be.
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In The Gloomy Depths [Chapter 1: Amethyst]
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Series summary: Five years ago, jewel mining tycoon Daemon Targaryen made a promise in order to win your hand in marriage. Now he has broken it and forced you into a voyage across the Atlantic, betraying you in increasingly horrifying ways and using your son as leverage to ensure your cooperation. You have no friends and no allies, except a destitute viola player you can't seem to get away from...
Series warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), parenthood, dolphins, death and peril, violence (including domestic violence), drinking, smoking, freezing temperatures, murder, if you don't like Titanic you won't like this fic!!! 😉
Word count: 5.2k
💜 All my writing can be found HERE! 💜
Tagging: @arcielee @nightvyre @camsdaae @mrs-starkgaryen @gemini-mama
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A note goes sharp, and you swim up through colorless currents—indistinct conversation, an iron-grey draft each time the front door opens, cigar smoke like fog over the ocean—and turn to the viola player. His eyes have caught on the place where your left hand rests on the table by a glass of pear cider, still cold from the icebox, misty with condensation. Rain pours outside. Logs fracture and hiss in the fireplace. Your gown is thick velvet, indigo like the night sky, and the ruffles of your sleeve have slipped back to reveal the evidence roped around your wrist: shadows of trapped blood, rubies that sicken and turn to sapphires and amethysts.
You hurriedly adjust your sleeve. Now the viola player’s eyes are on yours, an overcast blue and improperly direct, and something flies between you: his shock, your shame. You look away and pretend to ignore him. His horsehair bow finds its rhythm again, a tempo like a racing pulse. The quartet is playing The Wild Rover.
Daemon hasn’t noticed. He has ensnared the reporter entirely, here in O’Connell’s Bar in the heart of Galway, just across the street from Eyre Square and only a few blocks west of the Docks and the North Atlantic Ocean. The young man writes for The Irish Times and has traveled from Dublin to interview your husband, once a celebrated newcomer but soon departing and taking you with him. Five years ago a storm blew him in; now the gleam of distant treasure catches his eye and beckons him like the moon calls the tides. He has been this way all his life. You were mad to believe he’d change.
“Lord Targaryen,” the reporter says with his felt-tip pen hovering over his notebook, gazing at Daemon worshipfully, firelight dancing on both of their faces. You glance at the viola player again. He’s still watching you, and this is bad. “You’ve been described as a cowboy by numerous publications and business associates. Do you consider that a compliment?”
Daemon chuckles, smirking and imperious. He puffs on his pipe, elbows propped on the table. His eyes are a deep-set reptilian green, emeralds glinting from the mouth of a mine. Strands of dark blonde hair fall roguishly down over his forehead. “Oh, it’s a massive compliment, isn’t it? A cowboy eschews the safe and the predictable. A cowboy makes his own way in the world. My father was a duke, and now my brother is a duke, and one day my nephew will be a duke, God help us all. And so I always knew that if I wanted anything for myself, I’d have to go out and find it.”
The reporter is smiling, enraptured. He asks, already knowing the answer: “And what was it you found?”
“In the Wah Wah Mountains of Utah, we discovered red beryl.” Daemon talks with his hands, magnetic fields, incantations, spells that once worked on you. “It’s exceptionally rare and a gorgeous stone, high color saturation, not as hard as a diamond but durable enough for jewelry, essentially a blood-colored emerald. I was twenty-five years old and had just put together my first small mining expedition, and here we were sitting on the only known supply of red beryl on the planet. And it was then that I realized that there are these sorts of…natural monopolies that exist scattered across the globe, gemstones that can be found in only one location, and thus if you are the man who owns the mine…every single stone must pass through your hands before it ends up in retail establishments in London or Paris or Milan or wherever.”
“And so you took the lesson you learned from red beryl and applied it to other minerals,” the reporter says as he scribbles in his notebook.
Daemon grins, puffing on his pipe, exhaling smoke like a dragon. And how remarkable he is to have agreed to meet here in this pub like a common man, so unpretentious, so unafraid of the world’s dirt, effortless and yet untouchable, and this is why his miners love Daemon, why they will break their spines and poison their lungs for him. “We kept the Utah mine, of course, and bought up rights to thousands of acres of land surrounding it. I hired more workers. And then I investigated reports of mysterious, unnamed, brand new stones that had been stumbled upon in far-flung places, untamed by civilized men, the earth just waiting to be slit open and butchered like a fat hog. In Madagascar, we found Grandidierite, a bewitching blue-green, the Indian Ocean in miniature, crystalized form. In Tanzania, we discovered Tanzanite, halfway between an amethyst and a sapphire.”
The reporter nods to you as he says: “I believe Lady Targaryen is wearing some this evening, is she not?”
“Indeed,” Daemon replies without much interest. You touch your fingertips to your teardrop-shaped earrings and give the reporter a polite smile. You steal a glimpse of the viola player; he isn’t staring at you anymore—a blessing, a relief—but he frowns distractedly as his bow glides over the strings. “In Australia there was black opal, and in the Dominican Republic we were the first mining operation to encounter Larimar, and then…well, then I heard of Connemara marble.”
“Native to Ireland,” the reporter says proudly. “The lone quarry that’s still producing is right here in Galway.”
“So of course that intrigued me.” Daemon taps on the tabletop with his right hand, and now he is watching you, curling lips, taunting eyes. “And when I crossed the Atlantic to acquaint myself with this quarry and inquire into purchasing it, I was intrigued by the quarry owner’s daughter as well.”
His pen scratching against parchment; black rivers of ink filling up the page. “How would you describe the courtship?”
“Brief,” Daemon says, then laughs. He points to you with his smoldering pipe. “How about you, dear? How would you describe it?”
“Flattering,” you answer honestly, and the reporter makes his notes. “Daemon already had a reputation by then. A captain of industry, a staggering success story, a man who refused to rest idly on his family’s titles, which he could have easily done.” And a man who also refused to marry, rejecting Rockefellers and Morgans and Astors, duchesses and countesses, but asked your father for your hand in marriage after only a few weeks of tours of the quarry and dinners set alight with charismatic retellings of his travels. You knew the Connemara marble was part of the allure, but you took this as a common interest rather than the only thing Daemon wanted from you. Well…one of two things.
“You’ve resided in Galway ever since,” the reporter is saying to Daemon. “Barring a few trips for business. But that is about to change.”
Daemon sucks on his pipe. “I’ve received a very generous offer from Tiffany & Co. in Manhattan. They’ve been around for almost a century, did you know they supplied the Union Army with swords and surgical tools during the Civil War? Real patriots. Not afraid to get bloody. They want to expand into the sale of colored gemstones, not just diamonds and pearls and gold, the same unimaginative pieces peddled by their competitors. And after some long and arduous negotiations, Tiffany has agreed to pay a fair price for the exclusive rights to specimens originating from my mines, and I have agreed relocate to New York City for the foreseeable future to consult with them as a gemstone expert.”
“It’s my understanding that you have family in New York too, Lord Targaryen. Perhaps a reunion is part of the appeal of a move across the pond.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t assume that,” Daemon says impishly. “I haven’t seen Alicent Hightower or her children in years and years. I wouldn’t even know them if I passed them on the street.”
“Is that right?” The reporter’s pen hovers uncertainly over his notebook; he doesn’t think this is the sort of familial disharmony that should be printed in a newspaper.
“But my wife and I will have some company for the voyage,” Daemon continues. “My niece Rhaenyra and her charming husband Laenor will be joining us on Titanic. They’ve been on holiday in the Mediterranean and have several social engagements on the East Coast before they return to summer in England with my brother.”
“Viserys Targaryen, the 9th Duke of Beaufort.”
Daemon grins, not kindly at all. “One man earns a title, eight others wear it.”
The reporter shifts awkwardly in his chair. It’s not the sort of joke he’s allowed to laugh at. Changing the topic, he looks to the string quartet, which is now playing Danny Boy. The viola player’s eyes flick to you; you drink you pear cider and pretend you are unaware. “You’ll be sorely missed in Galway. But what a proper Irish sendoff you’re receiving here at O’Connell’s tonight!”
“Yes,” Daemon muses, the bit of the pipe in his mouth. “A week from now, tugboats will be hauling us out of Cork Harbor and into the Atlantic Ocean, perhaps never to return.”
You shudder as a man enters the pub and a cold draft blows through you. You are terrified of ships, tiny metal buckets at the mercy of bottomless blue, unnatural incursions into inhuman spaces. You have sailed twice before with your parents—once to Le Havre to visit Paris and again on a cruise of the Aegean—and both times you were consumed by visions of water rising up over your feet, bodies thrashing in the waves, bones turning to silt. You don’t want to cross the Atlantic. You don’t want to leave home.
“You look a bit familiar, boy,” Daemon says, and you realize he’s talking to the viola player. You startle, then are relieved to see that your husband has only a dim curiosity in the musician. The reporter has bored him, and Daemon’s eyes are wandering. He is a man of short and restless attention. You have learned this the hard way. “Have we met before?”
The viola player—early twenties, around your age, sandy blond hair and a beard trimmed close to the skin—pauses his fiddling as his three companions carry on. His accent is English, not Irish. “Well I’ve played all over Ireland, sir. All over Europe, in fact.”
“Were you by chance at the McPherson wedding back in February?”
You don’t believe he was, you think you’d remember him; but the viola player nods eagerly. “Yes sir, that was me.”
“Ah! That was a fine night. Excellent duck. Wasn’t the duck good, dear?” But Daemon only half-listens for your response. He has turned back to the reporter and is recounting how he and his expedition hacked through the jungles of Tanzania to reach the location of suspected gemstone deposits, how they endured attacks from crocodiles and chimpanzees and burned up from fevers.
“Please excuse me for a moment,” you say as you rise from the table. The reporter scrambles to his feet to stand as decorum demands.
“Yes yes,” Daemon replies abruptly, not looking at you, then continues his stories.
You escape from the pub through the front door and stand beneath the awning just out of the rain, watching the reflections of streetlights glow in puddles like stars. Across the street in Eyre Square, a public park established in 1710, shadows of ash trees rock in the wind. With trembling fingers, you fumble a Kerry Blue and your cigarette holder out of your black handbag, then realize you don’t have a lighter. Someone else always does that part for you. You sigh and stare out into the rain, taking deep breaths of Irish night, early April, cold and wet and green, the only air you know how to take painlessly into your lungs, blood, bones, the dark damp earth that built you. You cannot imagine living amongst metal skyscrapers and rumbling automobiles instead of verdant rolling hills dotted with sheep.
You hear the pub door open, and you assume it is one of the waiters or perhaps Rush—Edward Rushton, Daemon’s valet and bodyguard, ever-watchful and unwaveringly stern—bringing you the black mink coat you left inside. But to your horror, it is the viola player, carrying his instrument by its neck. You gape at him as rain continues to fall.
“Hi,” he says.
You are clutching your handbag, a cigarette and holder still tucked between your fingers. “What are you doing?”
“I just…I was…uh…” He spots the cigarette. “Oh, do you need a lighter? I have one, hold on…” He begins rooting around in the pockets of his olive green tweed jacket.
“No, I don’t need a lighter,” you snap, glancing anxiously at the door. “I need you to go back inside.”
“Wait a minute, I wanted to—”
“Why are you speaking to me?” Your eyes are wide and petrified, your voice is a sharp whisper. No musician has ever addressed you beyond pleasantries: Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, thank you ma’am, my pleasure ma’am. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Look, I came out here because…I just wanted to ask…” He struggles to find the words. His eyes fall to your left wrist, now fully obscured by the ruffles of your sleeve, then return to your face. “Are you okay?”
“What?”
“Do you…you know…do you need some kind of help or something?”
It’s improper, it’s unthinkable, it’s dangerous. “You’re deranged,” you say as you breeze past him towards the door. “You’ve clearly escaped from an asylum somewhere. I wish you all the best in your recovery.”
He does not grab you—that would be absurd—but he does get between you and the front door of the pub. “Wait, please, I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be rude or to overstep or anything, I’m trying to see if there’s anything I can do—”
“You will make it worse for me,” you hiss, and only then does the viola player go quiet and let you pass. You shove by him into O’Connell’s Bar.
Back at the table, Daemon and the reporter are engrossed in conversation. When you rejoin them, neither of the men take any notice of you beyond the reporter’s momentary rise to his feet. After a minute or two, the viola player returns to the quartet and slips seamlessly into the song they’re playing, Star of the County Down. You gaze into your pear cider, determined not to glance at him even once.
Daemon is saying as the reporter jots franticly: “I am reminded of something I read once in a French fashion critic’s guide from the 1870s. In the gloomy depths of the mineral world, stars are concealed that rival in their beauty those of the firmament. The fresh splendors of dawn, the sun’s incandescent rays, the magnificent sunsets, the brilliant colors of the rainbow, all are found enclosed in a morsel of pure carbon or in the center of a stone. Not everyone can see the potential, not everyone has the skill or the willpower to move the earth and free the treasures trapped beneath. But I found stars no one else knew existed. And my work isn’t finished yet.”
~~~~~~~~~~
At home in Lough Cutra Castle, your family’s estate since 1817, your parents are asleep and Fern is waiting up for you and Daemon, yawning into the back of her hand to try to hide it. She is your maid but she was hired by Daemon, and she scurries around the property like a mouse, eternally picking up toys and articles of clothing and papers that have slid off of tables, head bowed, footsteps so light you often don’t realize she’s walked into a room until she’s spoken.
“Care for some tea, my lady?” Fern asks as she takes your mink coat. Daemon goes directly to his study; you watch him leave with some feeling you couldn’t name, loss, relief, loneliness, resignation.
“No, thank you, Fern. I’m exhausted. Is Draco upstairs?”
“He is,” she says, but with hesitation, as if she is sending you into the lion’s den. You know what that means. You climb the staircase and find him in his bedroom sound asleep, four years old, surrounded by an army of teddy bears. Bears are his favorite animal; he likes the way they roar and brandish their teeth. He is named after the crest of Daemon’s family; Draco is the Latin word for dragon. His hair is white-blonde, a Targaryen trait. As they age it fades to an ordinary sand-like color, and by the time they are middle-aged—Daemon is forty, nearly two decades older than you are—their hair is a blonde so dark it’s almost brunette.
You stand in the doorway watching Draco for a long time. When you think of him, this is the image that comes to mind: your son across a room, or a lawn, or a garden, and you lurking on the periphery, longing to be a part of his existence, feeling so palpably unneeded. Already, he is becoming a stranger. He thinks it’s funny when Daemon insults people and breaks things. He stomps his little feet when he doesn’t get his way and rips flowers from the garden, tosses rocks through the windows of the greenhouse, hurls sticks at hissing geese.
“He’s asleep,” Dagmar says as if she’s scolding you. You whirl to see her behind you in the hall, glowering with those icy Nordic eyes, her hair grey and twisted into a tight bun, her face angular and cold-blooded. Legend has it that Saint Patrick expelled all the snakes from Ireland; you think he must have missed one.
“Yes, I can see that.”
“You’ll wake him.”
“I certainly won’t.”
“A boy that age needs his rest.” And this is how Dagmar has been since Draco was born: You can’t hold a baby like that, you can’t feed a baby like that, you can’t play with a baby like that, never showing you how to do things but only alienating you further and further until you looped around on some hopelessly remote orbit like Neptune circles the sun.
“Yes. Like I said, I won’t disturb him.”
But she does not leave; she only scowls at you with her bony arms crossed over her chest. She is ancient; she was Viserys and Daemon’s governess when they were boys, and your husband wrote to her immediately after Draco was born. She idolizes Daemon. The three of them are a family unto themselves, sardonic and spiteful and fiercely loyal, an oath you can’t figure out how to break. She wins this battle, as she’s won them all. It is not a war but an insurgency, a perpetual struggle for independence, sabotages and hunger strikes that amount to nothing. You retreat from Draco’s doorway and go to find Daemon in his study, bent low over his desk and sketching designs for jewelry men will buy for their wives, sisters, mothers, daughters, mistresses.
He glances over at you impatiently. “What is it?”
“You promised I’d never have to leave Ireland.”
Daemon shrugs, smiling wryly. “And yet…”
“Draco and I could stay here,” you say, as if this has not already occurred to him.
“And people would say my house is not in order. How am I to command the respect of American businessmen when my own wife does not obey me?”
You are desperate. “Half the year,” you plead. “I’ll spend winters in Manhattan and summers here.”
“Absolutely not.”
“What if I won’t go?”
“I don’t see how you’d accomplish that,” Daemon says, as if he’s already bored of this conversation. “You could throw yourself over the ship’s railing and into the Atlantic Ocean, I suppose. But that’s the only way you’re not ending up in New York.”
“You don’t even really want me there,” you reply, your voice quivering. “You don’t care where I am or what I do. Lots of men live separately from their wives, you can as well.” And even now—horribly, humiliatingly—you want him to contradict you, to swear that he does care, that he wants you, that he loves you in the sick brutal way he knows how.
Daemon picks up the dagger he keeps on his desk and uses it as a letter opener to unseal a piece of correspondence from one of his many mines, left in the care of managers just as your father’s Connemara marble quarry soon will be. The hilt is made of gold and has seven small gemstones imbedded in it, one on top of the other: amethyst, tiger’s eye, black opal, emerald, ruby, bloodstone, sapphire. “You know,” Daemon says offhandedly as he skims the letter. “Draco is getting old enough for boarding school.”
“What?” You are shellshocked; it takes a moment for you to sputter a reply. “He’s…he’s four, Daemon. He can’t read more than a handful of words. He just learned how to write his own name.”
“I was only five when my father sent me away.”
“And you turned out to be so normal.”
“No,” Daemon says, a blade-sharp warning, his eyes burning into yours, ruthless green fire. He aims the point of his dagger at you. “I turned out to be extraordinary.”
Draco. Draco sent away. If I lose him now, I’ll lose him forever. He’ll never know me. He’ll never love me. “Please let me have a few more years with him.”
“Sure. In New York.”
“I’ll go,” you surrender. “Fine, fine, I understand. I’ll go. No more complaints.”
“Good.” He sets down his dagger and the letter and resumes his sketching. You’ve been dismissed, but you can’t look away from him: cunning hands that won’t touch you, blood that runs hot enough to scald.
What is this feeling, this hunger, this hatred, all gnarled up together, dark earth glimmering with flecks of jewel-tone light, constellations of subterranean stars? He has hurt you, but he has given you pleasure too, this man who is so impossible to know, to predict, the only man who has ever been inside you. It’s not that you want him, not exactly; you want what he can give you, and the cold truth is that if it’s not him it’s not anyone, never again for as long as he lives. You’ve never craved another body, another soul. If you ever took a lover, you believe Daemon would kill you.
He grins, mocking and cruel. And you are transported back to your wedding night, still euphoric and flushed and panting on the bed as Daemon sighed and got up to go to the washroom, the satisfaction and the shame, the inescapable sense that you have disappointed him. “Did you only come here to be vexing and disobedient, or did you have something else in mind?”
“No,” you say softly, turning away, leaving him with his drawings of rocks stolen from distant corners of the world.
At breakfast the next morning—Fern cracking Draco’s soft-boiled egg and feeding him careful spoonfuls, Dagmar reading aloud to him from The Three Billy Goats Gruff, giving him smiles radiant with warmth you’ve never received from her—you sip tea and spread butter over your soda bread, gazing listlessly at the mist that hangs cool and heavy beyond the windows. Daemon is at the quarry already. You are suddenly acutely aware of the absence of music.
“Hey, lassie?” your father says as your mother tries to coax him into eating his full Irish breakfast: fried eggs, bacon, beans, mushrooms, tomatoes, white pudding.
You look to him, clearing the fog from your skull. “Yes, Daddy.”
“I saw the luggage. Where are you going?”
You keep telling him, but he doesn’t remember; he was becoming forgetful five years ago but now he can’t work at all, can barely even carry conversations. You had a brother who died in infancy and a sister who was taken at eight years old by convulsions. You are the only child left, and there are no other evident heirs to the quarry. This must have been something that occurred to Daemon when he met you, seventeen and overwhelmed by the black magic of him. He had seemed like the right choice: dashing, capable, from an illustrious family, a man who could take charge of the quarry as your father’s health continued to fail.
“Daddy, I told you. We’re going to Manhattan.”
He is stunned, grief-stricken. “What? That far?”
“Yes, on Titanic. It’s the largest ship ever built.”
“Who the hell cares about the ship?” your father says. “When will you be back?”
Never. You and your mother exchange a heartsick glance. She tries to be strong for him; she tries not to show you that her world is ending as you and Draco are taken across the ocean like gemstones mined and smuggled away for cutting. “Soon, Daddy,” you lie. He won’t remember anyway. “We’ll be back really soon.”
And then again ten minutes later, and then again after a half hour, and then again at lunchtime:
Where are you going?
When will you be back?
~~~~~~~~~~
Titanic is not a ship but a wonder of the world, unbreakable like the pyramids, towering like the Colossus of Rhodes, beckoning seafaring travelers like the Lighthouse of Alexandria. It is too large to dock in Cork Harbor, and so two tenders—named, quite appropriately, Ireland and America—are used to shuttle the passengers to the anchored goliath waiting to carry you across the ocean. Aboard, a five-piece string ensemble greets the first-class passengers with The Sunny South, and beaming stewards distribute flutes of champagne, liquid gold freckled with bubbles of trapped air. The men are chucking and shaking Captain Smith’s hand and the women are sighing with soft, feminine awe at the soaring funnels and the sprawling Promenade Deck, steel overlaid with yellow pine and teak, and you stare vacuously back at the shadow of the shore, speaking to no one, noticed by no one, alone in a wonderstruck crowd on a cloud-covered, warm afternoon, April 11th, 1912.
Rush is giving bellboys instructions for the luggage to be taken to your rooms. Daemon disappears with Rhaenyra to inspect the accommodations, their steps swift and careless, laughing like children, Rhaenyra’s blonde hair—yellow jasper, yellow jade—streaming out behind her, her gown a shallow-water bluish-green like the Grandidierite Daemon found in Madagascar. Fern skitters after them to unpack the bags when they arrive in the staterooms and offer to make tea. Laenor, wearing a deep and dignified shade of blue, immediately makes the acquaintance of several Parisian passengers and sets about to stroll the deck with them, smoking their pipes and remarking on the ingenuity of the ship’s design, planning to enjoy the Turkish Baths together this evening. Draco is getting tired and ill-tempered; Dagmar merrily whisks him off to see the Grand Staircase and distract him until the rooms are ready.
Meandering, rudderless, you walk to the deck railing and look down into the water as the ship weighs anchor, unmooring itself from Ireland, stealing you away forever. Trying to distract yourself from weeping—tears burn in your eyes like a stoked furnace—you pretend to adjust your earrings. You wear amethysts to match your gown, dark mauve, a color not long ago only owned by royalty. One of the musicians has appeared to soothe your maladies, desperate terror and melancholy he perhaps mistakes for seasickness. But no, it’s not one of the men from the ensemble that welcomed you aboard; he is not wearing a pristine black suit but a pale green tweed waistcoat and unceremonious plaid trousers. He isn’t a crewmember of Titanic at all. He’s the viola player from Galway.
You jolt away from him, spinning around to ensure no one from Daemon’s party has reappeared to witness this. Then you whisper furiously: “What are you doing here?!”
The viola player stops fiddling and holds his instrument by its neck. His answer is amiable and innocent. “Playing viola.”
“No, why are you on this ship?!”
He shrugs, smiling, his hair blowing in the wind as the tugboats pull Titanic out to sea. “Heard it was the biggest one ever built, unsinkable, extravagant beyond compare. Seemed like something I’d like to experience given the opportunity.”
“You followed me,” you say flatly.
He winks, resting an elbow on the railing. His teeth are small and white; there are lines from the sun around his eyes.
“You overheard our arrangements at O’Connell’s Bar and bought a ticket for yourself? Crossed Ireland, travelled south to Cork, all to stalk me like some lunatic? A nautical Jack the Ripper?”
“Well…I wouldn’t say I bought a ticket.” He is playful, teasing you. “I found one.”
“How did you manage to by pure happenstance find a ticket for Titanic’s maiden voyage?”
“I ran into an aspiring passenger at a pub in Cork,” the viola player explains. “A very nice man, his name was Fergal. Unfortunately for poor Fergal, when the time came to board the tenders, he was…indisposed, and I found myself in possession of his third-class ticket. A strange coincidence!”
“Indisposed?” you say, squinting suspiciously.
“Perhaps he had a few too many pints in celebration and passed out somewhere. Perhaps he got lost on his way to the harbor. Or perhaps he was locked in the pub’s storage room and therefore unable to make it to the tenders in time to sail blissfully away on his trans-Atlantic journey. Who could say for sure?”
“So you stole a ticket.”
“I think that’s a cynical way to put it.”
You are incredulous. “How would you put it?”
“Fortune brought me a ticket. The stars aligned, the saints were looking out for me.”
“If you hold a third-class ticket, you are on the wrong deck of the ship.”
“Shh!” He holds a finger to his lips. “No one knows that, I just wander around playing songs for the rich people and they assume I’m supposed to be here.”
“You have to stay away from me,” you plead, staring out over the ocean. “Daemon can’t see us talking, he can’t know you followed me from Galway, he can’t find out that you saw…” The bruise, the evidence, the betrayal of you not keeping his secrets.
“Relax, I’m not here for you,” the viola player says, and of course he is lying. “I have family in New York City. I left home and haven’t been back in years, and I think now’s a good time for a visit.”
You roll your eyes. “Yeah. Okay.”
He grins, slow and mischievous, and you are alarmed to realize some part of you wants to smile too. “You know what?”
“What,” you offer resentfully.
“I think you want me to be here for you.”
You turn away from the railing to make your escape. “I want you to leave me alone.”
“I’ll think about it,” the viola player quips. And when you glance back at him from the end of the Promenade Deck, ocean wind tearing your hair out of its pins and salt stinging on your skin, he’s still watching you.
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tj-is-down · 22 hours
Text
Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy (Tyler Owens x Reader)
Back again with another random fic for y'all. This is not proofread, so don't hate me!
Summary: Tyler and the reader have been on and off "together" for years now, keeping it secret. Until, suddenly, one of them decides they might want more.
Word count: ~2.1k
Warnings: None except some swearing, and reader is described femininely in this one.
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Here’s the thing about Humble Creek: everybody knows everybody. A small town made up of just under five thousand, there was nothing that anybody could do in secret, because if one person knew, then it was just as if they’d taken a bullhorn and announced it to the entire town.
Which made Y/N’s life all the harder. See, she did have a secret, and although it hadn’t gotten out yet, its secrecy was held in the hands of a monster. A tyrant, a tool, a pain-in-the-ass douchebag with a cowboy hat and a Texas accent.
Tyler Owens.
Y/N had known he was trouble since they were kids. Growing up on rival ranches, they were destined to be enemies, and even more so, to blur the lines. Y/N had never trusted him. Not because their families were constantly fighting, as she believed everybody deserved their own chance to prove themself, but because he had fucked his up, royally. 
In elementary school, middle school, high school, Tyler was always the talk of the town. Always with a girl on his arm, Tyler was confident, and everybody else was just putty in his hands. Y/N told herself she didn’t understand what people saw in him. 
She lied.
It started in eighth grade, when Tyler showed up in a too-big tux and a bouquet of flowers he’d handpicked from his family’s garden.
“You wanna go to the dance?” He asked, grinning cockily. Even then he knew how to charm, before he even knew what charm was.
Y/N’s dad had said no, absolutely no way, but Y/N was in her rebellious phase and so this only pushed her to say yes. She went out right then, in her mud-stained t-shirt and jeans, and they’d walked to the school together at seven p.m. and walked home together at nine. He’d kissed her cheek goodnight and she’d wiped it off, embarrassed.
“You’re annoying, Owens.”
“And you’re pretty, L/N.”
On the next Monday he came to school with Cherry Lee.
Y/N tried to be mad. She tried to hate Tyler, to swear that she’d never talk to him or think about him or even look at him ever again. But two months later, when Tyler and Cherry broke up, he’d knocked on her door when he knew her parents weren’t home and, against her better judgment, she’d let him inside.
They’d been on-and-off “together” ever since.
Now, Tyler wasn’t single for long intervals, usually just a couple of weeks here and there, and he would never cheat, nor would Y/N let herself become a homewrecker (no matter how fragile the relationship), but when Tyler showed up on her doorstep, bouquet in hands and that look in his eyes, she knew she couldn’t say no. 
She was an adult now, but still, she couldn’t resist those eyes. Tyler had been single since before leaving for college, and when he came back it was like he’d never left. Sure, now he had a truck, a big name, a crew, and a YouTube channel, but he still had those eyes, and his family still had a garden with a never-ending supply of flowers.
He showed up on her door one morning, after her parents had left for church.
“Can I help you?” She asked, opening the door. As always, a t-shirt and jeans, dirty from the morning’s work on the farm.
“You’re not at church?”
“You knew I wouldn’t be.”
“Well, maybe the two and I can practice praying on our own? I think the first step is kneeling down; you wanna start?”
Y/N went to close the door, but Tyler’s hand reached out to prop it open.
“Come on, Darlin’,” he said, laying the accent on thick. “You want to go for a drive? I’ll buy you a coffee.”
“Hold the coffee,” she said, walking past him. “I’d rather not have anyone see us together.”
He grabbed her waist and stood behind her, kissing her neck. “We’ve been doing this for years, babe. No one’s gonna find out, I promise.”
She leaned her head towards him, breathing in the scent of firewood mixed with his cologne. He pressed a kiss to her forehead.
“You gettin’ sappy on me?” He asked. Though his voice was soft, she could feel his smirk.
“Nope.” She pulled out of his grasp and got into the passenger seat of his truck. “We going, or are you just gonna stand there looking all doe-eyed?”
“For you, I’d stand here all day, sweetheart.”
“Just get in the car, Romeo.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
*** 
They drove for a while, to the outskirts of town, when Tyler stopped the truck and leaned over. He kissed her lips, hard and slow, putting his hand on the back of her neck to pull her closer. She reciprocated, holding his bicep, moving her mouth in tandem with his and letting herself fall into him.
“Why are you being so love-y today?” She asked after they separated.
“I can’t show my girl some love?”
“Is that what I am? ‘Your girl’?”
He shrugged. “Is that so bad?”
“You’re annoying, Owens.” She pushed his shoulder.
He mock-pushed her back as he said, “You’re pretty, L/N.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Seriously, though, there is something I wanted to talk to you about—”
Y/N scoffed. “Are you about to ask me out?”
“Well, no, but—”
“Okay, good.”
“Would that be so bad of me?”
“Kinda.” Y/N breathed a laugh, but when she saw Tyler’s face, serious and a little upset, she stopped. “I mean, it’s not like we have the best thing going on here anyways, and I just don’t want to be—” She paused, about to say heartbroken, or used, or a placeholder for when you find someone better, but Tyler cut her off.
“Yeah, you’re right.” He started the truck, engine roaring to life. “It was dumb, nevermind. I’ll take you home.”
“Tyler, you know what I meant—”
“Yeah, yeah. We’re just messing around, right? That’s all this is, just messing around.”
He didn’t say another word on the ride home. 
He dropped her off, barely waiting for her to shut the truck door before he drove away.
***
Tyler didn’t answer any of Y/N’s calls or texts for the next few days. Y/N was upset, barely leaving her room checking her phone obsessively for any sign of Tyler Owens. She even started watching his YouTube channel, but there hadn’t been any uploads for over a month. Nothing on Instagram or Facebook, either.
Her mother yelled up the stairs to her one night, calling her down.
“That’s what you’re wearing?” Her mom said upon seeing Y/N.
“This is what I always wear. Why?” Y/N was suddenly self conscious, confused as to why her parents cared what she wore in the house.
“Tonight’s the fair,” her mother responded, attempting to jog her memory.
“You’re helping us run our booth?” Her father tried.
“Ah, shit,” Y/N mumbled, remembering. “Do I have to go? I totally forgot.”
“Of course you have to go!” Her father said. “We need the three of us there; it’s a family ranch, remember?”
“Besides,” her mother added. “The Owens’s will be there. We can’t let them get a leg up on us! If you’re not there, Tyler will be running the show for sure.”
“Well, maybe not,” her father said. “He’s doing the kissing booth, remember?”
“The what?” Y/N said. “Tyler’s doing a kissing booth?”
Her father nodded. “To raise funds for his family’s ranch. He and his whole ‘team’ will be there, whatever they’re called.”
Y/N paused for a moment, trying to wrap her head around it all. Was that what Tyler was trying to talk to her about the other day? The kissing booth? But why would it matter what Y/N thought about it?
Her mother ushered her up the stairs. “For Pete’s sake, change into something nice, and quickly!”
Oh, shit.
***
The Humble Creek Fair was bustling with energy. People from nearby towns came to see what it was all about, and it was always the most popular time of year.
Y/N sat at her family’s booth, eyes peeled for Tyler. She kept checking her phone to see if he’d answered, but when she didn’t get any notifications she decided to take matters into her own hands.
“I’m going for a walk,” she said to her parents.
They both nodded, and her father added, “Make sure to see how the Owens’ booth is doing. I want to make sure we’ll still be in business next year.”
Y/N looked around for the kissing booth, and when she saw a long line of women, she followed it to the front. She walked around to the back of the attraction, but didn’t see Tyler anywhere. It wasn’t until she’d nearly given up entirely when she heard a voice behind her.
“What are you wearing?”
She whisked around, coming face-to-face with Tyler, who was holding some sort of weird meat on a stick.
“What are you eating?”
“Pork leg, fried and marinated in pickle juice,” he said, shrugging. “I’m hoping it’ll make my breath smell bad so less people come up. Now, back to you.”
“What about me?”
“You’re wearing a dress. You never wear dresses. ‘Jeans and a t-shirt, that’s me,’” he says, doing a poor impression of her.
“I don’t sound like that.”
“Yes you do, but that’s besides the point. What’s your deal?”
Y/N shrugged uncomfortably. “I wanted to, I guess.”
Tyler looked at her dead-on. “You look nice, Y/N.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ve been texting you for days. No response. But now that I’m here, all I get is, ‘I look nice’?” 
“What else do you want from me?”
“An answer, Tyler. What’s your deal? Why didn’t you tell me about the kissing booth?”
“I tried to, but then you came at me with all that ‘this is a bad idea’ crap, and I figured you didn’t want me to tell you. Or you didn’t care if I told you or not.”
“Okay, so—”
“Wait.” He stops her. “Do you care?”
Y/N kicks the ground. “If I did?”
“If you did,” he said, stepping closer to her. “I’d drop the pork leg and kiss you.”
“And if I don’t?”
“I’d eat the pork leg, and I’d kiss a bunch of people who aren’t you, and I’d feel like shit about it.” He took another step closer to her, nearly closing the gap between them. “Please say you care.”
“Ugh,” she scoffed. “You’re gonna make me say it? You can’t just, like, infer from the situation?”
“I’m really bad at inferring things,” he said, a cocky grin on his face. “So, I’m gonna need to hear you say it.”
“You’re annoying, Owens.”
“You’re pretty, L/N. Like, so pretty. But I do need to hear you say it, and I’m also gonna need you to—”
“I care, Tyler. Now shut up and kiss me, or I’m gonna take it back.”
“Can’t take it back, babe. It’s set in stone.”
In one fluid motion, he dropped the pork leg, grabbed Y/N by the waist with his other hand, and pulled her into a kiss. It was deep and passionate, not like any of the other times they’ve kissed. They kept it going for as long as they can, holding their breath until they couldn’t anymore, and then they pulled apart, gasping for air with their foreheads touching.
“Will you go out with me?” He asked her, still struggling for air. “Like, on a real date, not just driving in the truck?”
“I guess,” Y/N said, teasingly. “If I have to.”
“I mean, you don’t have to. But if you do, I’m gonna need you to wear this again.” He grabbed her and pulled her closer to him, if that’s even possible. “Because, if I’m being honest, L/N, this is the hottest I’ve ever seen you. Like, I didn’t think you could get hotter, but here we are. Speaking of, can we go? I really want to go somewhere with you. Like, privately.” He winked at her, and she scoffed, rolling her eyes again.
“Don’t you need to raise money for your farm?” She asked him, gesturing to the booth behind them.
“Fuck the farm,” he said. “Save a horse, ride a cowboy, yeah?”
“Fuck off,” she said, pulling him into another kiss.
“Seriously though, can we go?”
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engie-ivy · 2 days
Text
(Trying something new. Love to hear if you like🙂)
1021 words
High School Conversations
Edgar Bones
“So, how about it, Lupin?”
“... Come again?”
“You. Me. Drinks. It ain't rocket science.”
“No, I actually understand rocket science. You're not making any sense.”
“I want to take you on a date, Lupin.”
“But…why?”
“Why not?”
“For starters, I'm a loner who likes to spend his free time reading a book, while you're a star athlete who's almost the most popular guy at school.”
“Almost?”
“Well, there's-”
“Okay, okay, I know. Don't mention him.”
“So, it's ridiculous for you to want to go on a date with me.”
“It's ridiculous for someone like you to say no to someone like me.”
“‘Someone like me’ might not want to date someone he has so little in common with.”
“Don't be difficult, Loopy.”
"Calling me that won't increase your chances.”
“You should be grateful I'm even willing to spend my time on you.”
“You know what, Bones? Here's my answer: Fuck. You.”
Marlene McKinnon
“Hi there, Loopy Lupin.”
“Good god, what's going on today?”
“Why, that's not a very kind greeting.”
“Why are you talking to me, McKinnon?”
“I heard Edgar Bones asked you out.”
“And I said no, so don't worry, he's all yours.”
"The fact that you'd think I'd be interested in Bones is even more insulting than that rude greeting of yours.”
“I just don't understand what's going on today. First the school's jock, now the head cheerleader. Honestly, is it Talk to a Geek Day or something?”
“No, I think that's in March.”
“What is it, McKinnon?”
“I just want to ask you some questions.”
“I'm really not in the mood for-”
“Question Number One. Who is the most popular guy in school?”
“Sirius Black, of course. With his bad boy-image and that leather jacket of his, but his still perfect grades, that effortless charisma that lets him get away with anything, his guitar playing and that voice, his impossibly attractive smile, and that always-perfect-hair…”
“...”
“Or, ehm, at least that's what all those girls pining after him would say.”
“Of course. Your cheeks have turned a bit red there, Loopy.”
“So is your next question going to be who the most popular girl in school is? If you're just fishing for compliments you could've just said so.”
“Cute how you think I'd need your confirmation. But no, my next question is who is the second-most popular guy in school.”
“Edgar Bones.”
“What, no raving monologue for Bones?”
“Shut it, McKinnon.”
“And how would you describe the relationship between Black and Bones?”
“What is this, Twenty Questions?”
“I hope I won't need twenty, no. Answer this one please.”
“A rivalry. Or, well, a one-sided rivalry, that is. I don't think Black ever wastes much of his time on Bones, but Bones is obsessed with outdoing Black.”
“Like how?”
“Well, when Black wants a motorcycle, Bones wants a motorcycle, when Black gets his ears pierced, Bones gets his ears pierced, when Black starts a band, Bones starts a band. Basically, Bones wants everything Black wants.”
“Exactly. Now, how would a clever boy such as yourself combine this information with Bones asking you out?”
“... I don't know.”
“Oh, I think you do, Loopy. I think you do.”
“No, because the logical inference of the information you're presenting would be that Black wants… me, and there's no logic to be found in that.”
“Black fancies you, Lupin.”
“No. Just… No.”
“Yes. Just yes.”
“McKinnon, maybe for a head cheerleader the most popular guy in school fancying you is within the realm of possibility, but not for us geeky bookworms.”
“Ask Black out, then you'll see.”
“Is this a prank?”
“I'm wounded, Loopy. You think me so cruel?”
“The head cheerleader playing a prank on me is more likely than the high school heartthrob fancying me.”
“Well, since you're so obsessed with the head cheerleader-thing, let me put it this way.
Hey, Hey, Hear Me Cheer,
Hey, Hey, Hear Me Shout,
Lupin Should Ask Black Out!”
“Oh, for god sakes, please stop!”
“Lupin Might Be Geeky As Hell,
Black Just Thinks He's Swell!”
“Please get off the table!”
“Hey, Hey, Lupin Boy,
I've Got News You Might Enjoy!”
“I'll do it, okay? Just stop! Stop, and I'll ask him out.”
“Thank you.”
“You're a nightmare. I don't know why Dorcas likes you so much.”
“Wait, what?”
Sirius Black
“Oh, hello, Lupin.”
“Ehm, hi. So, ehm, a little birdie told me…”
“Mmm, was it a cheering birdie named Marlene?”
“Yup. Look, I know that a guy like me should drop to his knees and praise the lord if a guy like you would even breathe in his direction…”
“What are you talking about?”
“That you're probably expecting me to be grateful for any bit of attention you're willing to pay me, but…”
“Wait, what? Lupin, if anything, you are out of my league.”
“Excuse me?”
“Gods, you're so smart, and you read so many books, while I hardly ever read, and you have such an amazing dry sense of humour, with all those sharp, sarcastic remarks, you make my pranks seem juvenile, and I wear leather jackets and band tees, sure, but you can just wear cardigans and sweater vests and still look so unique and cool, and you have this calming presence over you, like when you're reading and you're chewing your lip in that way that you do…”
“You… you've noticed me.”
“Of course I have. You think I would fancy you without knowing anything about you?”
“Well, yeah. I thought… I didn't think… I don't know, I thought maybe you were bored or something?”
“This is not about me being bored, or about me wanting to shock people, or about me trying to stir the pot, or anything about me really. This is about you. You as a person.”
“You actually…”
“Yeah, I actually.”
“I… I promised that I would… No, screw that. I want to ask you out.”
“I think it's clear by now I would very much be okay with that.”
“Good god, I can't believe these words are coming out of my mouth, but Sirius Black, will you go out with me?”
“I'd love to, Remus Lupin.”
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brainwashed-babe · 3 days
Text
Repurpose My Brain
I love bimbofication but often that doesn't feel right to me.
There's this idea where the best way to be a bimbo is to get simple and dull. Use small words. Don't express original ideas. Just giggle and agree. And I'm not gonna pretend like that isn't hot!
But also... I can be better than that.
I've got intelligence. We could just get rid of that, yeah, of course. But why not use it?
Let me use my creativity to describe what I want you to do to me, filling your head with images that make your blood race. Let me flex my vocabulary as I whisper things in your ear that make you throb twice as hard while you pin me to the wall. Let me recenter all my focus and drive on things that are going to make you want to grip me so tight you leave fingerprint bruises.
I don't think I have to be stupid to be a bimbo. I think I have to be simple. And one way to be simple is to train my brain towards nothing but your pleasure. Pointing every part of my intelligence towards that like a guided missile.
Sure, make me dumb. Brainwash me until I can't remember anything else that happened before you. Fuck me until my brains are scrambled and scattered and unable to do boring real-world responsibilities. But don't erase them - use them. They're just one more part of me for you to get pleasure from.
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dear-ao3 · 3 days
Text
the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)
Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2
hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long). 
what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.
the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)
and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024
and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!
anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know we’re on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.
but here we are. were back on street circuits. we’re in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go. 
first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now. 
what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness: 
george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt
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fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.
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we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory. 
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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though
and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.
also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.
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he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as “desperate” so this was interesting
charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.
oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc
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max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.
we also had the return of daniel ricciardo’s jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago. 
heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:
lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki. 
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lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around
george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged
george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something
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max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding. 
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and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)
and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip
instagram
then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama
haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said “maybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards ‘want to get involved’ no matter the contact.”
in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. we’ve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.
adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where! 
ferrari? no that would be too obvious. 
mercedes? nah
williams? no too much of a shit show
aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show! 
that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025. 
apparently he was offered a “good package” according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power. 
he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari. 
fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.
by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).
lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:
"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."
mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclaren’s indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:
mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical. 
lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekend….
and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."
max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."
and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can. 
a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile. 
but! there is more! 
daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.
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which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.
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which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off. 
and with that. the baku lore. 
theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events. 
such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:
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they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that
the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully
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and of course. how could we forget. charles’s infamous “i am stupid” radio.
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speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls. 
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then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks. 
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but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.
some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say “this is not a car” (good thing they have adrian newey now, right? 
franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying. 
also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say. 
but alas. qualifying. 
i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE. 
so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box. 
max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that. 
slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster) 
charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won. 
and franco has never been to baku before. 
i think that's all the exposition that we need here. 
q1 started with max complaining about his car. “the car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axle” he said. despite this he was sitting in p3. 
the mid field battle though….the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice. 
the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando. 
lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault) 
now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag. 
if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader. 
in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.
and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up. 
q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norris’d. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled. 
in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say “he keeps missing the tow” 
and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon. 
max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th. 
and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race. 
steaming on forward to q3. 
we had, for review, in q3 the following: 
both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri. 
right out the gate it was wild. 
“red bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!” karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment. 
everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer. 
here were the standings: 
charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando
and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-
wait a second what is that
could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!
oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk
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meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.
and what do you know i have time
so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say
"the williams still has the air box fan in"
"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.
and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:
"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"
alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap. 
franco did tho!
and here were out qualifying results: 
p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex  p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel  p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: esteban 
oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit. 
everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second
onto the race. 
notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.
and so, we head into lap 1.
charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth. 
someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid. 
by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a  spot to nico. 
also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.
and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that “this tire is pretty bad” over the radio. 
yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being. 
franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL. 
lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past. 
george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break. 
on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th. 
and max’s car was not working. to potentially no one’s surprise. “i have zero bite in the car” he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap. 
several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo. 
“mojo seems to be back for checo perez” harry said, correctly. 
mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando. 
and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do? 
they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race. 
remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.
lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits. 
thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo. 
mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!
meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control. 
several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a “good, fair and robust defense,” which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done. 
ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place. 
charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. “they are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than us” he said. 
carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th
this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that “my brakes are not working.” this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.
also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do “everything you can do to get the surface temp down” of the tires. he said “im trying” then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say “are you seeing how i have to drive this thing?” “yes,” bono, his engineer said. “quite effective though.” 
max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not. 
but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was “not good for max’s world champion aspirations.”
this was also when ted very bafflingly said that “if i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on it” im not sure what that was in response to. 
meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working. 
lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando. 
“lando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying ‘zero wheel spin’ in every exit,” lando’s race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too. 
10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:
oscar
+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george  +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban  +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyu 
lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max
at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. “the back markers are starting to come up,” checo’s engineer said to him. “its going to get messy.”
“hold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto it” harry said. harry would turn out to be correct. 
we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and “welcome to the party carlos sainz!” who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.
definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem. 
oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had “no rear tires. no rear tires at all.” 
and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship. 
“verstappen’s day goes from bad to worse,” harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)
meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!! 
but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened. 
what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlos’s helmet after the crash. 
the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.
and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:
instagram
but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car. 
which meant 
OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP
and george inherited p3! 
and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit! 
“yes!” he whispered over the radio. 
he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the “one moment” hand gesture before properly celebrating. 
instagram
he also got driver of the day! 
(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio “i cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leaves”)
gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting. 
george said that the most difficult part of the race was “driving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lap…the vsc should have come out sooner” 
charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice. 
oscar was entirely pleased. “i managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.” and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.
and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!
the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled: 
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and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them
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(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)
george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium
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the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:
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and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran: 
-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management
-alex albon was “super happy, that's a lot of points for us” (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying “I can go, im happy to go” and then waving comically. 
-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season
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-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)
-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red
-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters. 
-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)
instagram
-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that “i didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.” he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying “i struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.” he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said “i didn't complain, facts were stated.” and to sum it all up he said that “im executing things well, i’m very quick…i’m not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guy….car is performing well everywhere…some red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right now” 
-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. “pretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so much….its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tires…..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.” 
-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram. 
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-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.
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-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today! 
-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscar’s wina and lando’s insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now. 
-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren. 
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-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast
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and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise. 
see you all soon!!!
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another-goblin · 2 days
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Doc and Gambler: An essay A disjointed musing
I've been thinking about the words they use to address or refer to each other. Gambler and Doctor are rather special nicknames. I can't think of other characters who talk to each other a lot but avoid calling each other by actual names so deliberately.
First of all, of course I can see it as a sign of their relationship. They are old friends, so it makes sense that they have cute special names for each other.
Can there be other explanations?
1. We never see them use each other's actual first names.
It's understandable with Aventurine. If he's ever comfortable being called Kakavasha, it's definitely not now. And I can understand if he'd prefer Kakavasha to just remain a happy, innocent child in his memories forever.
It's more interesting with Ratio. Nobody calls him just "Veritas" (I think?..) He's referred to as Veritas Ratio in some official situations in his character stories. Even his elderly professor, who talks about teaching Ratio when he was a child, only calls him "Ratio."
Actually, I remember a theory that "Veritas" isn't a personal name but a kind of honorific. Maybe a title that Veritas University gives to its most distinguished members. But if Veritas is his actual first name, then I think it's quite significant that nobody seems to call him that. Especially while all of the other characters who have identifiable western-style first and second names are mostly referred to by their first name. (I'm sorry, I don't know how the Xianzhou characters' names work.)
A little off topic, but is Ratio even his real name? According to the wiki, his full name means "truth of the matter," and his Chinese name means "doctor truth." What a coincidence that a person with such a name became a famous scientist. Although there can be other explanations too.
2. They do use each other's more commonly used names sometimes (I think Ratio called him Aventurine once in the game when discussing him with us, and Aventurine addressed Ratio by name a couple of times). But it's mostly nicknames. Mostly Doc(tor) and Gambler, but also "learned professor," "knowledgeable friend," and a hundred of silly ways Ratio refers to Aventurine. I made a whole post about it long ago.
3. Can it be because all of their direct interaction happened in Penacony, in the middle of a murder mystery somewhat reminiscent of the board game Clue, with our little "Mrs. Peacock" and "Professor Plum" here just imitating the naming conventions of such a game? Like archetypes from a classical detective story, where most characters can be described with one word like that. But it's a bit of a crack theory.
4. The only situation we saw them talking to each other was when they had to play their roles for Sunday.
It's interesting that Sunday later proceeds to call Ratio just "doctor" or "learned doctor" too, the way Aventurine did. I mean, strictly speaking, there isn't anything unusual in calling a doctor "doctor", but it's funny in an awkward way. Imagine two close friends having special names for each other. And then a complete stranger who's been eavesdropping starts using these names too. Umm, that's "Dr. Ratio", Mr. Sunday, thank you very much.
Btw, that's another point to the theory that Sunday only knows (and tries to use against them) the things they deliberately fed him through their conversations.
So it might be that they did it deliberately for Sunday to hear. Like, see? we are so not friends that we don't even call each other by name. But then we see them using similar words when mentioning each other while talking to other people, and in Aventurine's thoughts too (in mission descriptions during Double Indemnity).
5. Although it might still be the way for them to try and distance themselves from each other, at least verbally, trying to deny the obvious special connection between them.
6. Or maybe it's about their "masks". They both have public personas to hide their real selves behind. (Ratio directly tells us about it and wears a literal mask to hide behind, and Aventurine's whole Harmony ordeal was basically to show his inner self, so unlike the confident and cocky Aventurine other people know.)
But they know each other better and see deeper than just their public personas of "Aventurine" and "Dr. Ratio". And it's still too early in their relationship to prod deeper ("Kakavasha" and "Veritas"). So a secret third thing it is.
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wosoluver · 2 days
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Bad guy
misa rodriguez x reader
Billie Eilish x woso prompt list
Misa Rodriguez Masterlist
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──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──
Sitting on the couch, watching a thriller movie she knew to well, and constantly rewatched just 'for the plot'.
Misa's concentration had been whisked away, when she heard a knock on the door.
It was late, and she didn't plan on getting it at all, until she heard your voice.
"Misa?"
That caught her attention immediately.
Opening the door she had found you standing there, with a bag hanging from your shoulder. Eyes bloodshot.
"Y/n, what are you doing here?"
If you didn't look the way you did right now- with eyes puffy, tear stained face and entirely disheveled - maybe, just maybe she would have considered not letting you inside the apartment.
Besides being teammates, you were friends, in a complicated way. But this whatever it was- had been torn apart by your recent relationship.
It had been strained, especially these last couple weeks, after you two had a nasty argument, over the fact that she didn't like your boyfriend.
For the last six months she had tolerated the guy. She didn't like him from the beginning.
In part because she resented the fact that she wasn't the one taking you home at the end of the night.
But also, he seemed really shady.
First he started showing up everywhere you were, uninvitedly. Which she brushed off, noticing the way your eyes twinkled when you looked at him.
But then he slowly pulled you away from your friends.
You no longer hanged hang out, outside of training.
Despise wasn't a strong enough word to describe how Misa felt towards him.
"Can I?" you said snapping her out of her thoughts. She nodded rapidly, taking a step to the side, letting you pass.
Misa watched you with hawk eyes, placing your bag down, looking at the tv, trying to lighten up the situation, with a comment.
"This movie again?"
"I like the plot."
"You mean the leading actress?" you said with a small dry laugh.
"We are not changing subjects." she knew you. "What happened?"
"Uhm we just had a fight, don't worry. Normal couple stuff. Can I stay on your couch for the night?"
"Normal couple stuff? We barely talk this days, and you randomly show up at my apartment in the middle of the night? And asks me to not worry about it?" taking a deep breath. "No can't do."
"I'm sorry. This was a bad idea. I'm going to Sofie's."
"No!" she said getting in your way before you could leave. "Just, please tell me what's going on." her face softening. No matter what had happened she would always care.
"You were right."
"About?"
"Him!" you said sitting down at the edge of the couch. "He's a fucking self centered piece of garbage! Can you believe we was trying to manipulate me into leaving football? He wants a stay at home wife that doesn't travel around all the time."
"How long has this been going on?"
"Maybe a month or two,"
"Two?" her tone intensified.
"Since our argument. I started to reflect on what you said. When he brought up the idea of letting go of my job, I went over the edge."
She moved to sit next to you, placing a hand on your knee reassuringly.
"When he found out how close we were, he tried to make you the bad guy.
And I was so desperate..." she hadn't seen you like this in a long time. "But as he became more rigid and demanding, I realized maybe this wasn't good for me at all.
I tried breaking up with him."
now looking into her eyes, your vision blurry again.
"Tried?"
"He got out of control, I was quick to grab some of my stuff and get out."
"If he laid as much as a finger on you-"
"He didn't!"
"He could have! And I wouldn't be there to protect you!" she got up, angry at herself unfairly. Wiping her palms on her sweats.
"Misa, you can't protect me from everything."
"I can try." eyes glossy.
You immediately got up to hug her, taking in her scent you didn't know you had missed it so terribly.
Reaching to give the taller girl a kiss on the cheek, that was a more like the corner of her lips. It was normal between the two of you.
"If I had listened to you, none of this would have happened. I put myself in this situation."
"I shouldn't have let you pull away so easily." she said moving a strain of your messy hair out of your face. "Are you really going to sleep on the couch?"
"If you want me to."
"Ay, no seas tonta." letting out a slight laugh. "By the way, all your stuff is still on the top two drawers." she said following you to her bedroom.
──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──
You woke up with her soft breathing on the back of your neck. How you had missed this. You were now used to waking up to an empty spot next to you, this reminded how much you loved cuddling.
Glad that there was no training today, you turned facing her and went back into deep slumber.
The loud noise of your phone ringing nonstop in the living room had shaken both of you awake. You decided to go check it or at least turn it off.
Seeing his contact on the screen made you scoff.
"He's unbelievable." throwing your phone on the bed. When the phone had started to buzz once again, the goalkeeper was quick to pick it up.
"Diga."
"I want to talk to my girlfriend. Why do you have her phone?"
"Where else did you think she would go after running away from you?"
"Misa!" you whispered yelled standing close to the door.
"I can hear her voice, can you just pass the damn phone?"
"The only person you will talk to from now on, is me."
"This doesn't concern you."
"I beg to differ." and that was her final words before cutting the conversation off.
"Thank you. But you don't need to burden yourself with this."
"Come here." she said from where she was sitting on the bed.
You walked to stand in front of her as she placed her hands on your hips, looking up to you with her beautiful chocolate eyes.
"You know why I sleep on the side closest to the door, when you're sleeping over?"
You nodded, reciting the words she'd always say "If anyone breaks in, they have to go through you first."
"Exactly. You told him you don't want anything to do with him. And now he's going to have to go through me, if he wants to get to you ¿Vale?"
You nodded taking her into your arms as she hugged your torso. She managed to pull you back to bed, joining the warm covers.
──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──
"Mierda!" you hissed, looking through your bag.
"¿Qué pasa?" she asked from the doorway holding a cup of cafe con leche for you.
"I forgot my computer's charger."
"Use mine for now, do you want to go get the rest of your stuff?"
"No, but also it might be the best if I do."
"After breakfast then?" and you only nodded in agreement.
──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──
"Okay." she said parking the car, ready to open the door. "Stay here."
"Is that a question or?" you teased her.
"Sorry, I just-"
"Relax, I really don't want to face him." you were thankful for her protective nature, although Misa felt like it could be a bit much at times, you had never felt that way. "But please don't physically hurt him."
"Trust me." she said with a kind smile, getting out of the car.
She would honor her words, but to say she didn't want to punch some sense into him would be a lie. Although that probably would do nothing. If having you by his side didn't make him want to be a better man, she was sure nothing in the world would.
She knocked twice on the door.
"I knew you would come aroun-" he said opening the door, shutting up and gulping at the sight of the intimidating woman on the other side.
"I'm here to get her things." she stood tall, like she did often, arms crossed and face scowling.
He had the audacity to take a step into the hallway, looking both ways, desperate to see if you were there too.
"She sent me."
"Right." he said turning to get a box that was sitting by the door. "Couldn't wait to take my place, huh?"
She had never rolled her eyes so far back, bitting the inside of her cheek then letting a laugh out.
"Still trying to make me the bad guy, huh?" Misa said dryly taking the box from his hands, not waiting for another word and returning to the car.
──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──
I need your guy's help, what should go on next? I don't feel like it's done at all, but I wanted to put it out anyway, maybe someone comes up with something.
I'm also taking in requests! Will add new players to my request list.
As always like & share!
buy me a coffee!
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cellythefloshie · 2 days
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;; Don't Blame Me A Matthew Knies Fanfiction
Summary: Back home for the summer, you and your bestie hit up the neighbor’s pool party. In attendance is your sister’s ex boyfriend, Matthew Knies – but he’s only got eyes for you. Kinks & TW: sister's ex-boyfriend, age gap (older reader), sexual acts in public, car sex, sundress season, unprotected sex (pull-out method but make it sloppy), masturbation, drug and alcohol consumption (marijuana) Word Count: 6.4k+
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The base dropped, and your stomach went with it. You could physically feel the music as it pulsed through the home. From the speakers, the music vibrated the floor, you could feel it against your feet and how it reverberated into your bones. You couldn’t hear the laughter that slipped from your friend’s lips after a bad joke, nor could you hear the clinking of glasses as someone made a toast to the host, Phillip, that was happening nearby. 
Hell, you couldn’t even hear yourself think. Which wasn’t the worst thing, since it was your first weekend back home after a brutal semester of grad school. You had spent the last 10 months grueling over your degree. You should have been letting loose like everyone else at the party. Instead, you found yourself sidelined, clutching a neon pink drink your best friend had greeted you with as a peace offering for accepting the role as her wing woman for the night. 
The target? You hadn’t heard his name, but you didn’t need to hear him to know that he was exactly her type. Tall, brunette, and, as she so often described, her ideal man, medium ugly. He was a goner the moment she walked into the party, and he seemed to accept his fate with a smile - which made your job a lot easier. You just had to smile and hope he had good looking friends. 
Taking a long sip of your too-sweet drink, your eyes peered up over the rim of the glass, watching the crowd as it swarmed like bees in a hive. Bodies distorted by flashing, colored lights as they danced, others used the darkness to conceal a secret kiss - and where it was brighter, that’s where the real chaos ensued. You couldn’t see anything more than the fluorescent glow from the kitchen, but you could hear it, even over the blaring music. The hoots and hollers that could only mean one thing. A frat boy’s favorite pastime; beer pong–
“Hey!” You flinched as your best nudged you with her elbow to pull your attention back to her. “You’re so tense, you’ve got to try to relax. We’re back home! Have some fun, for once!” 
“Yeah, yeah,” you muttered, trying to smile, but you lost it as you brought your drink to your lips. You took a bigger gulp, feeling the sugary alcohol burn as it went down, and didn’t stop until the cup was empty. Maybe, if you drank enough, you’d finally loosen up. 
Being back home, you were supposed to feel at ease–free even. But you couldn’t be, not as long as you were in the house surrounded by strangers mixed with familiar faces that you hadn’t seen since high school. It left a heavy feeling in the pit of your stomach, a little thankful that your best friend had you hiding along the walls and away from the rest of the party. This had you dreading having to leave to get yourself another drink. 
You held up your glass, dandling it playfully in front of her face playfully, “where can I get another one of these?”
“The kitchen.”
Fuck. 
“Come with me?” You pouted, and just in case that wasn’t enough for her, you bat your eyes at her too. “I’m sure your man will be here when we get back.”
Her smile was mischievous as she leaned into her man to speak directly into his ear. He seemed to melt beneath her words, his jaw slacking and his head nodding along with her words. Then, with the promise that she would return, you were both free. 
You walked together arm in arm, and suddenly you were the center of attention. All eyes were on the two of you as you pushed through the crowd, and with the attention, you became all too self-conscious. Were your pants too tight? Did your makeup look alright in dim lighting? Your mind raced with insecurity, and it only got worse as you reached the threshold of the kitchen. 
It was there you paused mid-step, your best friend’s stride trying to tug you in after her, but you were an anchor, unmoving. 
There was a mess of bodies in front of you, all crammed into the kitchen like sardines. You had never seen so many people in one palace, their bodies colliding and voices loud as they took turns tossing the ball across the table. The splash of the ball into a cup sent the pale amber beer splashing from the cup and down onto the table. A large hand encompassed the red cup, near crushing it, before he brought it up to thin lips and chugged with such desperation that left the drinker gasping when he was through. 
You could only lick your lips as you watched beer bead down the man’s lips and chiseled jaw. The movement of your tongue mimicking his before you could even realize what you were doing or who he was. And when that moment dawned on you, you were ready to run out the front door. 
“Is that…” your best friend muttered just loud enough for you to hear. She didn’t leave your side, but she did lean in, squinting her eyes as if she didn’t have perfect vision. Then she gasped, confirming the sight that you had hoped was just a drunken mirage. “Holy shit, it is.”
There, at the center of the crowd - a crowd that you were only now realizing was the next worst thing after frat boys: hockey players - with the front of his shirt now soaked with beer as he chugged back another cup, was Matthew Knies, your sister’s ex-boyfriend. 
He looked almost the same as you remembered. Just a bit taller, and with a build that could have only been accomplished with the help of a coach or personal trainer. But it was clear he wasn’t the lanky kid that had broken her heart all those years ago.
They hadn’t been together long, maybe a half a year, but your sister was convinced she was in love. What sixteen-year-old in her first “real relationship” didn’t feel that way? She had gone as far as to plan to move to Nebraska to be with him after she graduated, but he had other plans. He hadn’t had the guts to break up with her before he left. He had been a dumb teenager, but that didn’t stop you from resenting him. 
“Let’s just make a drink and get back to the real party,” you spoke through grit teeth, your gaze dropping to the floor. 
Together, you and your friend pushed around the roster of hockey players and made your way around to the makeshift bar on the kitchen counter. She made your drink for you, just as she had done before, and just when you thought you were in the clear, she whispered to you, “he’s coming over here.”
“Shut up,” you hissed as you took hold of your drink and gripped it tight. 
Before you could fully brace yourself for the interaction, Matt was standing in front of you. Towering over you and smiling. He looked good, annoyingly good, with a casual confidence that only made you more irritated. 
Thankfully, before you could say something you would regret, your best friend took the lead. She offered him a sickeningly sweet smile, her arms opening up wide to greet him with a casual hug. They had grown up next door to one another and had been the reason your sister had even crossed his path. Yet, she masked the annoyance she held in solidarity with you, and greeted him with soft pleasantries, “we didn’t think you’d be home. I thought that’s why your brother was hosting.”
“He’s around,” he replied to her with a smile. Then he looked directly at you. 
You bit down on the inside of your cheek, your eyes narrowing as you leaned your neck to look up at him. “She’s not here,” you bit out at him, your words so sharp and bitter you had to wash them down with a sip of your drink. 
Matthew stared at you, his eyebrow raised and head cocked to the side - and you could have sworn you could see him smile as he spoke. “Nice to see you, too.” There was no hint of malice or annoyance in his tone. Instead, they oozed with pleasure, as if he were happy to see you. 
It made your teeth grit. 
Glancing at your best friend, she met your stare, the two of you silently planning your escape route from the kitchen - from him. Which left his movement unnoticed to you until you could feel the heat of his body radiating against your side. In the crowded space you were backed into a corner, trapped between his broad and towering body and the bar as he mixed himself a drink. 
Your skin prickled with a mix of anger - and something else you didn’t want to identify, or didn’t have the time to, because as Matthew was pulling back with his fresh cup, his elbow knocked your arm. The contact sent the pink liquid of your drink splashing down the front of your white shirt. You gasped, the cold liquor sticky on your skin as it soaked through the fabric and revealed the bra you wore beneath it. 
“For fuck's sake,” your words were a hiss through your teeth, “you neanderthal!” 
“Shit, I’m sorry,” he spoke quickly, his hands reaching for an expensive dish towel. Matthew draped it over your arm and dragged it up and over your shoulder in an attempt to dry you off, but it only frustrated you further. Lurching away, you glared up at him, and he stared down at you wide-eyed and mouth gaping, “I can make you another drink—”
“I don’t need another drink,” you bit back. “I need something to wear.”
Putting your empty cup down on the bar, you pinched at the stained white fabric of your shirt and pulled it away from your chest. It was sticky, see through, and his teammates were staring.
“Run back home,” your best friend’s voice pulled your hardened stare from Matthew’s oblivious one, “let yourself back into the house. Chance, and I’ll catch up with you later.” She punctuated her words with a wink, and before you could respond, she was off, walking back into the glamouring glow of the party - back to her medium ugly man of the night - and that left you alone with Matthew. 
Fantastic. 
Forcing a smile, you turned to leave, pushing your way back through the crowded party and out into the front yard. You stumbled down the steps, sneaking past people who had stepped out for a cigarette or just to escape the noise. The gust of night wind was welcome on your face, though it chilled your body. But you were only cold for so long. The touch of a large hand grasping your elbow heated your body and left you spinning in place at the bottom of the steps. 
Your hair fell across your face, obscuring your view of the person who still had his grasp on you. They weren’t quite holding you back, nor were they trying to stop you from leaving. Their touch was a mere attempt to let you know he was there before he spoke. “Hey, what did I do to deserve the third degree?”
Matthew. 
For fuck's sake. 
“You mean besides ruining my favorite shirt,” you shot back, trying to shake him off as you marched across the lawn.
While he dropped his hand, he continued to follow. His footsteps echoed you, his body your shadow as you unlocked the door and stepped inside your best friend’s home. You knew its layout better than your own home. You didn’t bother turning on the lights, and instead navigated through the living room and up the stairs to the second story bedrooms. Matthew tripped and fumbled in your wake, only to find his composure behind you as you disappeared into the bedroom door. 
Turning on the small lamp that rested on the bedside table, you used its glow to rummage through the suitcase you had yet to unpack. Articles of clothing became strewn over the bed, something you surely would come to regret later when you were hopefully too drunk to even get out of your clothes. At the bottom of your bag you found exactly what you wanted, a linen sundress in your favorite color. You almost smiled at the sight of it, holding it up with both hands as you admired the clean, dry fabric. 
Fingers let the fabric fall to the bed before your hands retreated to your shirt, only to pause. Sighing, you looked back over your shoulder to find Matthew standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest as he watched you. Maybe if you gave the answers he was looking for, he’d finally leave you alone. 
“You know what you did,” you told him, your voice laced with years of pent-up frustrations. 
His features seemed to glow with the realization of just what you were referring to. It was like a lightbulb finally glowing bright after hours of flickering. “That was five years ago,” he exclaimed, punctuating the sentence with your name. 
You huffed, your body burning hot with anger. It left sweat to bead down your back, and your hair standing up on end as you grew impatient with him. Turning in place so that you stood with your back to him, you stripped yourself free of your sticky shirt and jeans. You left them in a heap on the floor, standing at the foot of the bed in nothing but your bra and panties for a moment before pulling the dress on over top. When you were done, you glanced at him as she stood there, waiting for something. 
“Stop staring at me,” you muttered, a single hand reaching down and pulling your bra out from beneath your dress like some sort of magic trick. It, too, soaked with liquor, became lost on the floor. 
“Forgive me and I’ll leave you alone,” he proposed. 
You scoffed, pushing past him as he stood in the doorway. 
He followed you back out onto the lawn, his body so close to yours you felt his heat, and his legs caught the fluttering fabric of your dress. His presence only infuriated you further. 
“We were sixteen,” he said, pleading with you as you reached his driveway together. 
“She loved you,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper, “and you broke her heart.”
Matthew was scoffing now, his frustration seeping into his tone. “We didn’t even know what love was back then. We never even–”
You stopped dead in your tracks, the implication of his words hitting you like a ton of bricks. “Are you seriously telling me you dumped her because she wouldn’t sleep with you?” you asked, disgusted but not surprised. 
“No!” he answered quickly, as if he had fumbled the very conversation. He took a deep breath as he reached for your arm, taking it gentle. He seemed surprised when you let him, his hold careful as he guided you back to sit on the hood of the car in the driveway. There his head hung low, his long shaggy hair falling into his face, and his hand left your body only to prince the bridge of his nose. He took a long, deep breath before he spoke again, his voice quieter now. “It wasn’t like that.”
You scoffed, your eyes rolling as you continued to demand more from him. “Was she not good enough for you or something?”
But while you escalated, Matthew remained calm, composed. “Something like that.”
Your hands curled into fists at your sides, your knuckles going white, as every fiber of your being was ready to explode. “You’re lucky I don’t hit you for saying that,” you spoke slowly, your eyes on the ground as you tried to breathe through the anger. To hit him wouldn’t be the sweet revenge your sister deserved, but it would be a start-
“She wasn’t good enough because the person I wanted was you!” Matthew blurted out, his voice raising just enough to stop you from interrupting him. 
Yet, you didn’t think you heard him right. You couldn’t have. Matthew wanting you? It was simply unbelievable… comical… and the longer you sat there simmering in his confession, the harder it was to believe. Then, without warning, you burst into laughter. It was so absurd, so completely ridiculous, that you couldn’t help it. You laughed so hard your stomach ached in the best way and it forced you to lie back carelessly on the hood of the car. There, you let your head lull to the side, your hair falling into your face as you smiled at him. 
Matthew, however, met you with a soft yet firm stare. He wasn’t joking, and that terrified you. This man was delusional. 
Slowly, he slid off the hood of the car and took two slow steps to stand in front of you. His hand raised first in surrender before coming to rest on each side of your body. They were flat against the hood, trapping you in place. “I’m serious.”
You sat up, a single hand reaching up to push the hair from your face. You wanted him to see the near hysterical look on your face as you challenged him. “You’re delusional.”
“Maybe,” he admitted, his eyes locking onto yours. “But you’re still incredibly sexy.”
Your body flushed with heat, and your brows furrowed. His words weren’t supposed to affect you like that, and sitting there with his hands so close to your thighs, you convinced yourself that they normally wouldn’t. But there, sitting on the hood of that car that cost more than you could even fathom, with the heat of his body between your knees and that heavy, almost vacant stare, you were weak for him in every inch of your body - but you still had your mind. 
“I’m too old for you,” you retorted, trying to keep your cool. 
“Are you?” he challenged back, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. 
“I finished undergrad before you were even drafted,” you pointed out, searching for any excuse to push him away when your hands wanted nothing more to reach out, grab him by the shirt collar and pull him in. 
“So what? That doesn’t change anything,” he scoffed. 
“I don’t know if this is some kind of fetish for you,” you started, desperate to regain control of the conversation, “but you really should be hitting on girls your own age.”
“Why would I do that?” he asked, his tone casual, as if there was nothing wrong with the attractions he felt for you. It was with that question you made the mistake of meeting his eyes. You saw the intensity there, and it made your heart race. 
“Why?” you raised a brow at him, “because they wouldn’t be your ex-girlfriends older sister.” You leaned in just enough to emphasize the allure of your proposition. "You have a house full of young, pretty girls who haven’t sat through awkward family dinners with you at the table."
The two of you shared a small smile that made your words seem more like an inside joke than a good idea. He laughed, though it was more of a chuckle, as he leaned in just a fraction closer. “And they wouldn't be playing hard to get.”
“Oh, that’s what you think this is?” you asked, your voice finding a more teasing, jovial tone. 
Matthew laughed again, his hair falling into his face. He reached up to push it back, but when his hand retreated, his touch found your cheek. His fingers caressed down the angles of your face, ghosted the corner of your mouth, and found your chin. Matthew took it gently between his thumb and forefinger and tilted your head back oh so slowly. You held your breath as he looked at you, really looked at you, like he was seeing you for the very first time. And then, without warning, he leaned in. You felt the warmth of his breath before you felt his lips. It plumed over your face with its sweet intoxicating scent, as if to pull you in that last breath of an inch to his thin lips that meshed with yours in a slow, tentative kiss. 
For a moment, you were too shocked to react, so you just sat there, his lips grazing over yours so lightly they barely touched. You were sure he could feel you breathe out the shudder that coursed through your body. It was only then, as the innate part of you threatened to take over, your brain caught up with it and you pushed him away with both hands and looked at him wide-eyed and breathless. 
“What the hell?” you stammered out, wiping the ghost of him off your lips with the back of your hand as you tried to make sense of what just happened. 
Matthew just stood there, his expression unreadable, as if he was waiting for you to make the next move. 
And for the first time in a long time, you had no idea what to do. 
You sat there on the hood of his car, unmoving. The warmth of him radiated against the inside of your thighs, his hands so close to the curves of your hip as he stood there, his body still so close to yours and his lips so close to returning to your lips. Yet, he held such restraint. You could see it in his eyes as he stared at you, waiting desperately for more. But you couldn’t give it to him. Not Matthew. 
Too handsome for his own good, Matthew. 
Your sister’s ex boyfriend, Matthew. 
Could be fucking any other girl at the party, Matthew. 
Far too young for you, Matthew. 
Your mind was made up. Dropping your eyes to the ground, you let your body slide off the hood of the car. The skirt of your dress inched up your legs and Matthew’s hands reached out to grab you before he flinched back in retreat. But that subtle touch was enough to knock you off balance, your feet stumbling as they reached the ground. It was then your body collided with his, the friction like striking a match–And in an instant, the decision to leave him there in the driveway was gone. Instead, your mind was clouded, hazing with only one thing. Not a thought, but a need. 
Matthew. You needed him. 
Cursing yourself under your breath, so quietly not even you could hear yourself as you pressed up onto your toes let your lips find his. There was no hesitancy in the kiss that found you, his kiss desperate, almost in fear that at any moment you might change your mind. Matthew’s large hands cupped each side of your face, his thumbs releasing the tension in your jaw and coaxing your mouth open. You almost moaned at the taste of his tongue with little care to anyone who may hear you… or see you. 
Anyone could have been watching as the two of you stood there, his larger, towering body trapping you between himself and the car. From most angles, those enthralled by people watching might not have known you were there, Matthew’s body so much bigger than your own that he hid you behind him. They wouldn’t have noticed how his hands left your face when they no longer needed to draw you into the hunger of his kiss. Of how they traveled down your throat, unleashing a desperate gasp against his lips that you were left to choke on as his hand continued to travel down. Down over the swell of your breasts and curve of your waist. Up and over the swell of your hips, and down again until he found the fluttering hem of your sundress. Slowly, a single hand found its way up your dress, his thick fingers dragging over the sensitive skin of your thigh, and he didn’t stop until he was stroking over the thin cotton of your panties. 
Your eyes almost rolled as his fingers grazed so lightly down there that you were sure that he was lost, clueless, that he didn’t know where to put them like almost every other man. But then he surprised you, his hand falling flat against your mound to palm at your clit through your panties. Instead of rolling your eyes, you shut them as your lips pulled away from his to let out a heavy breath that was laced with a single word, “fuck.”
Legs went weak at the feeling, your body ready to fall into him, and he knew it. His free hand dripped into his pocket, and as discreetly as you can unlock a sports car - the front and rear lights flashing brightly in the night - he invited you into the back seat. 
Stomach jumping into your throat, you looked back at the car and all you could hear was your own heartbeat in your ears. Matthew stepped away from you, the hand that was up your dress, reaching for the door handle and drawing it open. He stood there, his body draped over the door, watching you with soft eyes, and s stupid crooked smile as he waited to see if you would accept.
You should have hesitated - or panicked - but you didn’t. You didn’t even look back at the front door to see if anyone was watching before you rounded the back of the car and climbed into the back seat. 
It was cramped, your head almost hitting the hood as you climbed in, and you quickly realized that there would be no sprawling out in the back seat of his car - and especially not as Matthew climbed in after you. He made his body small, sitting in the seat to close the door with a soft thud before he was stretching out over you. The light above you both slowly dimmed, and he smiled a smile that was all to telling. 
This was something Matthew had daydreamed about for a long time. You could see it in the way he looked at you, his eyes soft as they took in every little detail, and his touch lingering on the back of your knee as he propped one leg on the headrest before sliding down the back of your thigh. It rested there once he got you positioned just right, your head resting against the car door, your back on the seat and your legs spread with him between them. Matthew kneaded the soft flesh of your thigh slowly as he leaned in to kiss at the skin of your neck. 
You had half the mind to tease him when you felt the beginnings of a hickey on your neck, but every time you thought you had found what witty words you wanted to say, he was doing something that left you breathless. 
Matthew’s teeth would grave over sensitive skin. 
Heavy breath. 
His tongue tasted the angle of your caller bone. 
You trembled.
His finger coasted over your panties, dipping lower and lower until his fingers were between your legs. 
You couldn’t breathe, your lungs burning for air that you couldn’t bring yourself to take as his thick fingers hooked onto one side of your panties and pulled them to the side. His knuckles dragged over your wet cunt, coating them in your arousal, and he didn’t say a word. There was not a single attempt to be sexy, or some disgusting comment about how wet you were. Instead, there was only the sound of his breath hitches as he let his fingers slide into the eagerness that was your core. 
With your head spinning, your back arched off the seat to angle your hips down, taking his fingers deeper into your core until he was knuckle deep. And when he pumped his fingers in and out of you in uneven thrusts, you thought you might have completely lost your head. Not once in your life had you imagined this happening, nevermind it feeling so good. 
Yet, you wanted more than an adolescent finger fuck in the back seat of his car. 
Both of your palms found the strength of Matthew’s chest, pushing him back carefully. They remained there as he sat down in his seat and you contorted and scrambled to straddle his lap. Your panties still pushed aside, you reached down and unbuckled his belt. His eyes went wide, as if the magnitude of what was about to happen hit him. His hands met yours, as if them bumping into one another and fumbling made freeing his cock come any faster. With the button of his pants undone, you grasped each of his hands and directed them up to rest on each of your hips. 
“Relax,” you smiled, leaning in slightly, “let me.”
He smiled in return, his head nodding slowly as he watched you. 
Your hand left his once you knew he wouldn’t move them, and you let them drag down the strength of his chest slowly. You could feel every one of his muscles through the wrinkled fabric of his t-shirt and you hated that you let yourself indulge yourself in him so fully. As weird as it was to be so close to fucking your little sister’s ex-boyfriend, you’d be a liar if you said you didn’t want to…You stroked your hands up and down the length of his chest, working your way lower and lower each time as you leaned in to kiss his neck. There, you heard him gasp in your ear as you let your hand glide down to his cock. You grasped it with one hand, awkwardly stroking at it as you were careful not to hit your head on the roof as you pushed a little higher on your knees to get the angle just right. 
You worked him slowly with your hand, each reaction making you all the more eager to take him between your legs. Yet you waited and watched as his head lulled back on his shoulders. Matthew's eyes shut slowly as his law slacked, and the beginnings of a groan slipped from his lips. That was when you carefully guided him to your core and eased your walls around him with the careful bend of your knees. 
Mentally coloring yourself for how much pain you would be in later, you rode him. Your hips rolling and you carefully bobbed up and down the length of his cock. Quickly, your leg muscles burned, your hand reaching out to the headrest on each side of them as you pushed through the discomfort and focused on the pleasure of his cock inside you. 
His feet pressed firm to the car floor, Matthew's hips raised to meet you. And each bump displaced his kiss as it traveled from your lips to your neck, then the tops of your breasts that threatened to spill over the flimsy fabric. If he had the time and the space. Matthew surely would fuck you right out of it. But now wouldn't be the time - not as you were left biting your tongue to fight back the moans you didn't want anyone to hear; not when one casual glance into his back seat would leave you both exposed if it wasn't for the fabric that flowed down over his lap. It concealed everything you wanted to see. His cock and how it parted your walls with such ease. How your arousal dripped down him, leaving his cock and balls glistening with the satisfaction of pleasuring you. The sight alone would have sent you over the edge right from the start. But it would be his sudden need for control that pushed you over the edge. 
Matthew wrapped both of his strong arms around your waist tightly, hugging your breast to his face as he took your weight and lay it back down over the seat. He struggled for a moment, trying to get the leverage and the position just right before he braced himself on both of your hips. Matthew plowed into you the best he could with the little space you had, the force of his body shifting your body inch by inch across the seat and sending your head into the car door. 
Reaching and up, you braced yourself against the door, your hips raising to meet his every thrust as he arched over you. Matthew's sweat drenched t-shirt hung heavily away from his body, and you could feel beads of sweat rain down you from the angles of his face. You tasted him as it fell onto your lips, your tongue licking it away as your eyes fell shut. You focused on the taste of him, the warmth of his body between your legs, and the pleasure of his cock inside you. It left your body hot and your toes curling in your shoes as each repetition brought you closer and closer… so close–
“Ah, fuck,” Matthew cursed, and your eyes shot wide open as his cock throbbed inside you as he came undone. His face was soft like melting butter as he eased back, his hand quickly dropping to his cock as he pulled from you. He stroked himself quickly, shooting ropes of his cum against the inner flesh of your thigh and the cushion of the seat. 
Selfish prick, was what you wanted to groan. Instead, your hand left the door and dropped between your spread legs. You found your clit with your fingers, rubbing in quick, messy circles that felt more like a figure eight, pushing yourself back towards the peak of your pleasure that Matthew had left you on the very edge of. Your breathing became shallow and hastened as it crashed over you like an ocean wave. Between your legs, your core clenched, and you could feel Mathew’s cum slip from you. It made your legs tremble, your feet struggling against the seat to give yourself the room to close them around your own hand, but Matthew was still between them, his softening cock in his hand and slaw jawed as he watched you writhe in his back seat. 
“Enjoy the show?” you breathed out to him, your finger pulling your damp panties back into place. 
“Sorry,” he spoke quickly, sounding like he was on the verge of stuttering. 
“Don’t be,” you shrugged, sitting up slowly and carefully to avoid getting cum on your dress, though you were sure some had already found its way there, “I get it.”
Matthew fixed his pants around his waist in silence after he wiped his hand clean on his boxers, and after a quick glance and a smile sent back towards you, he opened the door and stepped out into the night. He stretched when he was free from the confines of his back seat, a single hand pushing his hair back out of his face before he offered it to you to help you out of the car. 
“Are you coming in?” Matthew asked you, not even breathless, as he slicked his hair back with the simple motion of one of his hands.
Fucking athletes. They always made you feel out of shape. 
“I need a minute,” you sighed, feeling very much your age. You could feel the ache of sex everywhere in your body. From your fingers to your toes, you felt the epitome of relaxed and tense at the same time–though, part of it could have just been in your head as it raced trying to remember the last time you had sex in the backseat of a car, and when or if your body had ever contorted like that before. 
“Do you need anything?” He’s polite enough to ask, but it makes you want to hit him. Instead, you wave him off with the simple wave of a tired hand. Matthew smiled, “find me later,” then, he was gone, lost beyond the front door of his house to continue his night as a good host. 
You remained in the driveway, your tired body leaning up against the hood of his car. There was a chill in the night air that left the beads of sweat on your skin, feeling like cold raindrops. You shivered, suddenly wishing you had a sweatshirt to pull over your dress. But you quickly had the next best thing, the arm of your friend draping over your shoulder as she leaned back against the car beside you. 
She hugged you tight with that single arm before it slipped away from you to delve her hand into her pocket. When she pulled it out, she had a lighter and joint in hand. How it hadn't been crushed during the hug or during her flirtations over the course of the night was beyond you, but you were relieved. As you were slowly coming down from the high of your climax, your mind racing with the thoughts of what you had just done. It both excited you, and left you feeling nauseous. Smoking a joint with your friend seemed like the perfect solution.
You watched as the tip of the joint glowed red as she took a long drag. When she finished taking another, the smoke leaving her mouth in wisps that were caught by the night breeze; she handed it to you. You took a long drag; the smoke suffocating your lungs and only did you exhale when the burning reaching your ears and the smoke left your lips in a harsh cough. But that didn’t stop you from going in for a second drag before you were handing it back to your friend. 
“I’m bringing Joseph back home with me tonight,” she told you, your fingers barely grazing as she took the joint from you. “Is that okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, go crazy,” you encouraged as you leaned back against the hood of the car. You took deep and steady breath, the daze of the high already beginning to fog your brain. You smiled as your tight muscles relaxed, a satisfied hum leaving your lips that was maybe a little too loud. 
“Careful,” your friend cautioned, a sense of urgency in her tone, “you know how men get with their cars.”
Your shoulder shrugged carelessly. “I don’t think he’ll mind. I already ruined his back seat.”
Gasping, she lay out on her stomach, her limbs hanging over the hood of the car awkwardly as she gazed in through the windshield. When she gasped, she shot upright, her hand reaching out to hit you playfully as she exclaimed, “you slut!” It was said with great love and endearment. You both laughed.
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TAGLIST: @mp0625 , @starshine-hockey-girl , @wingedwheelprxncess , @kurlyteuvo , @couldawouldashoulda50
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inchidentally · 19 hours
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Inch what is your opinion on this clip? https://www.tumblr.com/eightyonefour/762429464940527616/what-kind-of-guyteammate-is-oscar
It makes me sad that Lando isn’t able to find a lot of words to describe Osco ;-;
ohhh anon I know for most ppl this is all so boring and not interesting but the way excitable!nervous!shy!butextroverted!fidgety!sassy!emotional!squirmy!insecuresometimes!pleaseloveme!whydoyouhateme?!seeIknewyou'dloveme!creative!sexualconfidence!HORNY!travelstheworldintechnicolor!babyfever!workaholic!Lando exists against calm, placid, self-assured, does his job well,what's the point in doing less than his best, work life balance, lowkey, rational, good with kids but talks to them like adults Oscar makes me so emotional for god knows what reason ??? ;_;
but to Get Into It, I know this is the choppiest messiest compilation I've ever done but hopefully it'll be both self-explanatory and also go along well w my usual dissertation on something that has no real life importance for me but that makes me Feel Things
x x x
so the main thing with how Lando's stops for long periods to think and mull it over is for two reasons: one is that he hasn't done the usual PR aspect of his rs with Oscar the way he has with other drivers/teammates - and the other is that if he found Oscar dull or uninteresting then he wouldn't have had to sit and think aslfgsaljfgsajl. Lando's rly good with the media and honestly this answer would've been rly easy and quick if he could just say "yeah he's very fast and a good guy! hard worker and solid teammate!" bc it's not like anyone is expecting any more about a guy like Oscar anyway!
and with everyone else, Lando's got lots of anecdotes and jokes and shared activities as well as lots of experience interacting on camera in ways that give fans something to enjoy. it's not being disingenuous, it's just that they can easily tailor the friendship to be useful for publicity.
but !!! it's also the case of all of Lando's friends on the grid being extroverts as well as being great on camera. and Lando maybe could be seen as an extrovert but he's also naturally (self-confessed as well as confirmed by those closest to him) painfully shy and he relies on extroverts around him to help him out a lot. I got this ask that we don't even need proof of bc it's exactly how Lando is when he's alone among strangers or around huge crowds. same with when he has to do publicity stuff all alone the thinking silences stretch and he gets that upward inflection where he's trying very hard to see if the other person knows what he means??
and Osc is very much not an extrovert and while he likes the odd shared activity, he has said he prefers quiet conversation in small groups away from public places. so literally ! the ways he and Lando are compatible are simply in enjoying spending time together and being extremely low pressure friends who don't like the publicity aspect encroaching on that.
so how do you describe someone to a stranger if they're just quietly a good, reliable person who you like and work well with ?? Oscar himself needs a fair amount of prodding and encouragement to describe himself, let alone Lando being asked to do it !!
which I think is why landoscar has actually had this strong resonance for a lot of us who have those kinds of friendships or love those kinds of people - you can only see it and get to know it by observing it and knowing it in a way yourself. the way Oscar stares at Lando and does his little self-assigned duties to Lando and the way Lando watches Oscar in that wide-eyed trusting way and lets his brattiness out bc Oscar will always find it endearing. none of that makes for snappy PR content but if you get the vibes then it's so so sooooooo sweet ;__;
it's also why their dynamic lends itself so much to fic authors bc you've got a strong foundation of their authentic dynamic since they can't/don't fake it or play it up, from which you can put them in any scenario or any roles and they just… write themselves! not in a sense that the author isn't putting the work in as a writer skfgalsfg but the strongest thread among landoscar fic is that dynamic always coming through so consistently (even in the more challenging dark fic or out there AUs) the classics I can think of first off are playdate by debrief, that one from work can come over on monday night by higgsbosonblues and q&a by corsi
the common development of how Oscar is so blatantly changed by Lando in ways that seem either superficial or purely practical so that Lando ends up initially missing out on the depth of what that means - and misinterpreting Oscar not changing emotionally for him as disinterest. only to find that when someone who is solid and reliable and knows who they are decides they love you, they show it by changing their life for you and not changing themselves for you.
and that irl considering that Oscar always says how important it is for his relationship with Lily that he spend time with her that isn't connected to his career/life's passion, it's clear that he considers that to be proof of how much he cares. so all of the little ways Oscar bends and adapts and fulfills Lando's practical needs are ways for him to say "I value you" "I make you a priority in my life" "I want to fit you into my life" "I am willing to give up something/change something for you"
like idk how much Lando realizes the significance of those things and that's how I interpret him spending a very long time mulling and thinking rather than just getting past the answer in a neat, succinct way. bc Max F is a very emotionally intelligent guy and very capable of expressing his feelings, all of the guys on the grid are varying levels of emotional awareness/intelligence but they all have the same regular expectation of using their words to express how they feel about friends, and ofc the people surrounding Lando for the past ten years are highly attenuated to his needs. Oscar stands out as this very very different person to what he's used to!
and lastly, there's the whole gentleness and communicating through their kitten smiles and their ways of getting lost on a random subject - they're just such a quiet, gentle introverted dynamic. there's this moment after Japan last year waiting for a train, as well as this moment from Vegas where the crowd is singing happy birthday to Lando that I think are like, poetic levels of how their shyness/introversion fully matches up. bc neither of them feels easy or comfortable actually interacting with the crowd, so they keep looking to each other and smiling for comfort and reassurance. if another driver from the grid were around they could probably rely on him to brazen out the situation, but these two kittens just find solidarity in each other to get through!
so a lot of what makes landoscar a flop for bromance-only ppl is what a lot of us love about it <3<3<3 like I love a good bromance and self-aware PR ships too but landoscar made me want to get an f1blr and write insane pointless dissertations about them so shrug emoji !!
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giannaln4 · 3 hours
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I'm Sorry
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lando norris x fem reader
summary: A moment of frustration made Lando react the way you never thought he would, and boy, would he regret it.  (1.6k words)
warnings: angst, swearing, argument, mean lando,  fluffy ending
a/n: ok so for this, i decided to go back to Baku and put the quali result in a totally different perspective than my last fic. i guess i kinda like it but i'm not very good at describing arguments 😭 anyway pls let me know what you think!!
ALSO i have an announcement to make and i'm really excited for it :)
check out the original request here!
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The qualifying this weekend was an absolute mess, to say the least. Lando was hard on himself no matter the result he got. Even if it was good, he would always find something to criticise himself, but P17? Everyone was in for a treat, you thought.
The worst part is that it wasn’t even his fault; it was a stupid mistake by the marshals, and he was not to blame for it. A yellow flag interrupted his lap, and he was immediately kicked out in Q1. 
Seeing the first qualifying session being over with his name in red was not something anyone wanted to see, especially not him, and now that every point was essential, you knew it crushed him.
He came back to the garage to see the rest of the qualifying with his team, and as soon as he got out of the car, you saw how frustrated he was. You understood him, of course, it sucked that this is how the weekend was going, but you would be there for him no matter what.
Once Lando took off his helmet, he headed straight to his driver’s room, and he didn’t even look at you when he walked past. That meant he wanted to be alone, but oh silly you, you decided to follow him.
He let out a loud sight when he heard the door open and close behind him, not really in the mood to hear what you had to say. He knew for a fact you were going to tell him he did well and it wasn’t his fault, which he greatly appreciated, but right now, he just wanted to suffer in peace.
“Baby?” You called him out, just testing the waters, but he didn’t respond. Instead, he hummed in annoyance. “I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but-”
“You are right, I don’t want to hear it,” he interrupted you, not even turning around to face you. He placed his hands on the desk and leaned into it, taking a deep breath. 
That should have been your cue to leave the small room and leave him alone, but for some reason you didn’t. “Lando, don't beat yourself up over this. It wasn’t your fault, and I’m sure things will be better tomorrow. We all know what you can do and you still have the race-“
“This is MY job, Y/N. I probably know better than you do,” he snapped, raising his voice and finally turning around. “This is what I’m fighting for, we all are. Do you know what’s at stake here? I finally have the chance to compete for a championship, and I just blew it.”
To say you were astonished was an understatement; this was the first time he ever snapped at you that way and you didn’t know how to react. “I’m sorry, I just-”
“Every point counts, and not even starting in the top 10 tomorrow- fuck, not even top 15, there is not much I can do.” Now, he looked more mad at you than frustrated at himself, and that crushed you. “I came here to be alone for a bit, I was hoping you would at least respect that." You stayed silent, knowing a single sound would make you cry, and you didn’t want to piss him off more than he already was. “I know you are trying to help, but you are not, you can’t.”
You just stared at him, tears threatening to leave your eyes; he had never raised his voice at you in a heated moment, and it hurt like hell. You definitely should have stayed outside. 
He walked towards the door and stepped out of the room without uttering another word, leaving you alone to deal with your own feelings. 
As soon as the door was closed, you started crying. It was your own fault, really; you could always read him like a book, even today, and you knew better than to disturb him when you weren’t supposed to, but today for some reason you just couldn't keep your mouth shut. Idiot.
You tried to calm yourself down; the last thing Lando needed was to see you cry on top of his result, but it was harder than you expected. This being the first time an argument got so out of hand made you feel absolutely terrible, especially because it was your fault. Deep down, you knew he didn’t mean it, you knew it was his feelings talking, but that didn’t make it any less painful.
A few minutes went by and you could still hear the cars out on track, the mumbling of the team, and people constantly working out there, so you tried to use that as a distraction. Anything to take your mind off what just happened. 
Unfortunately, it didn’t help, but at least you ran out of tears, and now you were just staring at a blank wall, thinking how you could begin to apologise for earlier, if he would even give you the chance to. 
Truth is, you weren’t sure if bringing it up again would be a good idea; you wanted to apologise for disrupting his cooldown moment, but what if hearing that made him mad again? Or worse, what if you didn’t apologise and made the situation even bigger? Your spiralling made you lose track of time, and a knock on the door pulled you out of your thoughts. 
“The car is about to leave, Y/N, they are waiting for you,” you heard someone say on the other side of the door. You were at least hoping Lando would come and get you once it was time to go back to the hotel, but he didn’t.
“Thanks, I will be there in a minute,” you replied, grabbing your things and Lando’s before sprinting outside. 
The car ride was hell. Lando didn’t look at you the entire time; he was just staring at his phone, texting who knows who, his face as neutral as ever. It felt longer than it actually was, and when you finally got there, he just stepped out of the car and didn’t look back. You let out a sigh and followed him, leaving a prudent distance between the two of you. 
Once you were in the hotel room, you both started to get ready for bed, like you usually did, except this time, you didn’t acknowledge each other. 
That was until you were already on your side of the bed and he came out of the bathroom, taking the spot next to you and burying his face on his phone again. The entire time you were building up the courage to say something, anything, now that you decided that apologising was the right thing to do.
“Lando?” You called for him, but again, he just hummed in response. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. You were right, I shouldn’t have said anything, and I should have respected that you just wanted to be alone.”
That’s when it hit him. How could he get so mad at you for trying to make him feel better? 
He dropped his phone and turned to face you, and noticing your sad expression and teary eyes broke him. His eyes softened as guilt washed over him. Why were you apologising when he was the one who reacted like that? But as soon as you looked down at your hands to avoid eye contact and tears started falling down your face again, he felt even worse. 
“Y/N… Baby, I’m so sorry.” He got closer to you, softly taking your cheeks in his hands to get you to look at him. “Please don’t cry, I’m sorry I acted like a dick and raised my voice at you,” he stared, wiping your tears away, carefully thinking about what else he could say. 
You, on the other hand, didn’t know how to react. Your plan was to apologise and hopefully move on, but now that he was apologising, you didn’t know what to say; you didn’t want him to feel guilty, even though it was his fault you were in that position right now. If only he took a different approach. 
“It wasn’t your fault, okay? You were just trying to help, and I should have appreciated that, you know that I do, I just... I don’t know, there is no excuse for what I did.” But you were still silent and trying to avoid eye contact. “Baby, say something.” 
“Lando, you yelled at me.” You finally replied, your voice a bit muffled by your tears.
“I know, I shouldn’t have done that, and I promise I’ll never do it again.”
After a minute of silence, you just nodded, which made him let out a sigh of relief. “Okay.”
“Okay? I’m sorry, my love.” He pulled you into a hug, your head on his chest as he placed a soft kiss on your head. “I know I was a dick, and I really wish I was nicer about it.”
“It’s okay, I get it; you were frustrated with your result, and I should’ve known better than to interfere with what you were feeling.”
“No, it’s not okay. I was frustrated, but I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” Lando was rubbing your back softly, trying to bring you the comfort you tried to give him earlier. “I love you, and I can’t describe how much I appreciate everything you do for me; I know having to deal with my shit is not easy, so thank you.”
“It’s fine, I mean it.” You looked up at him, locking eyes finally in the entire day. “Just... don’t push me away, okay? And if you do need to be alone, just say it, and I promise I will listen next time.”
“Okay, sounds good.”
He gently placed a hand on your check, rubbing small circles before leaning in for a kiss, one both of you much needed. And with one final ‘I love you’, you feel asleep in his arms.
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