#I just remember that anecdote she gave about how she watched the movie

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

(Look away)(So with all the hoaxy revelations of late are we getting to the point where it might turn out that DBATC was inspired by a movie that perhaps resonated with Taylor for… reasons? 🫣)(I’m still taking her at her word until she says otherwise but man today was a day on the dash lol)

[alj4890]

If you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs! Anon or not, doesn’t matter!

Oof, I got five of these requests now 😂 Does that mean fifteen facts? I'll try to do three for each ask. I'm nowhere near interesting enough for this 🤣 Thanks @jerzwriter @angelasscribbles @twinkleallnight @peonierose @aussiegurl1234 for the asks 🥰

1. I have never left the United States. There were multiple times where I'd planned a trip or planned on spending a semester of school out of the country, but something major would happen to keep me stuck here 🤣 I don't think I'll ever get out of here😂

2. I'm an only child who grew up outside of Memphis, TN on fifty acres of land. My only neighbors were family members. My cousins are fourteen, eleven, and nine years older than me, so it was up to my imagination to entertain myself 😂

3. I married an only child. My husband and I decided to have at least two children after his father became seriously ill with his heart and we saw how hard it was on my husband in having to make all the decisions concerning life support. That's how I ended up being the mother of two.

4. I've never had to study. If I read something once, I'm able to remember just about all of it. Not really a photographic memory but close to it. I'm the same with hearing something. I can usually walk out of a movie theater, quoting lines from certain scenes.

5. I never wanted a big wedding (even though I have a huge extended family) because I hate being the center of attention. I dreamed of eloping somewhere beautiful, on a spur of the moment decision. I kinda got my dream. My husband gave in to eloping in the Smoky Mountains during a very snowy January, but he wanted it planned with a tux and wedding dress and just our parents. I gave in and was happy I did after finding the perfect dress and in seeing how much it meant to our parents

6. When I was twenty-nine, I had to have a complete hysterectomy. Benign tumors had taken over my ovaries and were embedded in my uterus. The ones in my uterus had grown and stretched it to the point where it was the size it would have been if I was three months pregnant. Since I wasn't pregnant, it was some of the worst physical pain I've ever experienced with it pressing into various nerves in my back and pelvic region. I've never been more excited to have surgery than that day.

7. I'm not really a crier. I can watch sad movies, lose loved ones, be depressed, but the tears rarely fall. People have been shocked and thought I either didn't really love them or that I have no heart. Trust me, I do, I just don't really cry. The few times I have broken down and actually had tears, my loved ones and friends have panicked not knowing what to do since I'm supposed to be the stoic one of the bunch. It ends up being like that scene in Sense and Sensibility when Emma Thompson breaks down 🤣 Everyone freezes or tries to leave the room 😂

8. I love to laugh and joke around. I have both a silly and extremely sarcastic sense of humor. I use humor in everything and as often as I can. I'm the one you sit by during serious situations if you want to diffuse the tension with a giggle. I've even made people laugh at funerals during my eulogies (all respectful and usually just a funny, sweet anecdote about my loved one). Life is too precious to not find all the little bits of joy we can.

9. I did everything that my late aunt predicted I would in life. She said I would get a teaching degree, which I did. She said I would meet my husband before I graduated college, which I did. She then said I would teach a few years before having my first child, which I did. She then said I would probably get my masters degree between my first and second child, which I swore I was done with college when I graduated but I did do that very thing and got my M.A.Ed. focusing on library sciences between having my two. And to make it all the sweeter, I ended up being like her with having two sons who were exactly the same years and months apart in age as hers were. She was beyond thrilled that I was just like her in that aspect 😂

10. I always thought I would have girls (most of my family has nothing but girls or at least one) Me and my late aunt were the only two to have nothing but boys. It worked out great for me. I've never been into fashion, not really into anything really girly, can't fix hair at all 🤣, and always loved all the superheroes, video games, and Star Wars stuff that makes me the perfect mom for my two boys.

11. I love classic movies. The silent era, the thirties (especially Pre-Code) and the forties are my favorites. I'm amazed with the special effects, the stunning sets, stories, and amazing acting the stars of the Golden Age of Hollywood created. I will devour not only their films, but biographies on anyone working during that time, documentaries, and any tidbit I can find. I was born during the wrong era.

12. I truly believe I could survive happily on nothing but cheese dip, chips, and salsa. And peppers! Jalapeno and Pepperoncini are my favorites. Ghost pepper is becoming a favorite too. Last night, I made a bowl of peppers and ate them like popcorn while watching TV. I love to burn 🤣

13. Winter is my favorite season. Snow is beautiful and I wish I lived somewhere where it was guaranteed to fall for months on end. That's the dream. One day, I hope to move either to Wyoming or to Maine (I've visited both and fell in love with both of them) 😂

14. The hardest thing I've ever experienced in my life was when I suffered a miscarriage. It was my first pregnancy and it was one that wasn't planned. My husband and I had only been married for about six or seven months when I discovered I was pregnant. I was over the moon excited. I bought maternity clothes, started buying baby things like little outfits, bows, toys, etc. Then I started cramping near the end of the third month. Tests were done and it showed the baby stopped developing at eight weeks. No heartbeat. Nothing. I was devastated. I actually prayed I would die during the D and C. I hoped I would have an allergic reaction and die right there on the operating table. I thought it would be easier for my family to lose me that way. I felt like my body had betrayed me in the worst possible way. I hated it and I couldn't stand the depression that set in. This was one of the few times I cried, especially when I woke up after the procedure and saw I'd survived. I continued to pray for death for a few months after it. I knew I couldn't hurt my family by commiting suicide, nor could I talk to them about my feelings, so I begged God to make my heart stop, make my car run off the road and hit a tree, anything to stop the pain I felt. I then begged my husband for a divorce. I didn't want to be around anyone. I didn't want comfort, couldn't stand for anyone to touch me or hug me. I hated our home and the memories it now held for me. I wanted to simply disappear and feel nothing. I didn't want to talk to anyone, respond to what was going on around me, pretend that life was still going on. It was the darkest time in my life. I've written about the one night I broke down the hardest with my husband in a Thomas Hunt fic which was almost cathartic. Everything he and my OC say is the conversation my husband and I had that long and painful night. It still hurts after all these years later, though nowhere near that it once did, and every May I can't help but think I should be celebrating my first child's birthday.

15. That above fact shouldn't be one to end on, so let's end with something funny. With my oldest son, I had an ultrasound to find out if he was a boy or girl on April 1st. Our technician was known to joke around, so I was highly doubtful I was having a boy. I was convinced she was pulling an April Fool's prank on me 🤣 Until he popped out and the proof was in front of me, I thought he might end up really being a girl so I made sure to have a gender neutral outfit packed just in case it really was a joke 😂

[minachuuu]

Itzy Reaction to being sick and cared by their S/O

This was so fun to write, knowing some of the Itzy girls, I don’t think they fancy the idea of staying still, but it’s super fluffy and domestic!💖

Yeji

You sighed, crossing your arms as you watched once again at your girlfriend urgently roaming around the apartment. The doctor had demanded her to rest for a few days but you weren't sure what that really meant for her, or if she even knew what the word 'rest' meant. 

Being the oldest member and leader for quite a while, Yeji had forgotten how it really felt to be taken care of. You can't blame her for always wanting to look after herself instead of letting herself be taken care of, but it was definitely making your job of keeping her in bed a little harder than usual. 

You had been running around the place reminding her to rest, and every time she went and sat on the sofa, but didn't last there more than five minutes at a time. As your last resource to finally get her to stay put, you went to get a huge blanket, wrapped her from behind on it, carried your 'Yeji burrito' bridal-style to your bedroom and unwrapped her there.

"Hey Y/n! What was that for!?" She whined as she let herself fall into the bed. Her curious eyes followed you as you ran all around her. 

"It doesn't look like you're as sick as you say you are!" She furrowed her eyes, confused at your statement. "Just let me show you what it really means to rest, okay?" 

You turned on the TV in one of her favorite dramas, successfully engaging her attention as you went and prepared more things for her. As the bath filled itself with hot and steamy water, you prepared a hearty and warm dinner for her, put little candies with the meds that she had to take and made sure she always had a good supply of water and tissues. It was all pretty new to Yeji, to just lay and have all those things just come to her, but she could definitely get used to it, especially if at the end of the day, it meant more cuddle time with you. 

Lia

Jisu is one of the most clever girls you have ever met in your life, part of what attracted you to her was that she would get everything she wanted in ways nobody really saw coming. And that alone was the reason why you lowkey started suspecting if she really was that sick at all. 

She was enjoying all your cares a little too much to have an injured ankle that needed rest, that maybe for a moment you wondered if she acted as if it was more severe than it was only to get a little extra rest time. But every time you think of that, you remember how she looked like when she arrived home the night she injured herself. 

It happened back in practice, only a misplaced step was enough and Jisu had twisted her ankle, falling down to the ground. Her staff had already taken her to the doctor, as you only got to receive her back home, being carried in the arms of her manager. 

Even after listening to the story and witnessing the deep bruise on her ankle, she still had the nerve to joke about the whole ordeal. 

"Maybe I need to twist my ankle more often if that means you're going to spoil me this good!" She sneered while tasting the food that you had ordered for her, her smile never erasing off her face. 

"I'll spoil you all you want," You whispered, with hints of concern scattered in your voice. "But please, no breaking any limbs on purpose."

Jisu was a strong woman, you had absolutely no doubt about that in your heart. The way she handled everything life threw at her always with a smile and humor as her weapons, only reassured another thing that made you fall hard for her from the first time you met: How she always saw the good side of life. 

Ryujin

"But I'm fineeeeeee!" It was probably the hundredth time you heard Ryujin excuse herself as she walked around your apartment. You counted down on your head and exactly as you hit cero, she sneezed once again, shaking the entire house in the process. 

You had honestly given up on making her stay still, Ryujin has always been incredibly stubborn though she rather likes calling herself a persevering person. From the instant that you first started noticing her increasingly common sneezes, her stuffy nose and sore throat you wanted to take her to the doctor, but she kept dismissing you every time, saying that she 'didn't feel bad at all' But you knew her a little too well, and it was only a matter of time before… 

You know those times where she throws her little tantrums? You leaned against the door frame while you watched her groan against her yoga mat as she laid flat over her stomach. You let her vent all that was necessary, until she turned around and finally faced you. 

"Okay, maybe I'm not feeling precisely incredible," She accepted, shrinking her shoulders. You helped her up and offered her a tissue. 

"Shall we go get you checked?" You scoffed lightly, to what Ryujin sheepishly nodded. 

The doctor was quick to tell you both that it was only a cold, and sent you both back home to rest. She was very complacent into taking her meds and rest enough, but that didn't mean she wasn't going to be frowning the entire time. You only chuckled at her facade, there was no way she was hating all the attention and cares as much as she wanted to show it. Because when Ryujin thinks you're not looking, her smile shines as she cuddles into you, holding for dear life the hot cup of tea that you know how to prepare exactly as she likes it. 

Chaeryeong 

No one enjoys looking at their girlfriend being all sad about hurting herself. Chaeryeong wasn't amused when the doctor told her that she had to heavily rest for at least three days if she wanted her leg to heal perfectly. You had noticed her a little blue after the incident, but she knew she had to take care of herself if she wanted to go back and dance her heart out like she loved to. 

You had enough of her sad frown, you missed your girlfriend's smile and even in these circumstances you were put on getting it back. You stood up from the couch where you both were turning the endless channels for something interesting to see, getting your phone, you ordered Chaeyoung's favorite takeout and a few sweet treats to spoil her. As you waited for your food to arrive, you ran to your room and collected all the pillows, banquets and cushions you could find. 

For the last touches, you cleaned the dust off your string lights and rushed over to the living room, hanging them around from all different places. Chae's eyes only followed you around, confused. She watched you putting up the lights and hanging huge blankets from the furniture, covering all the floor and sharp edges with pillows and… that's where it dawned on her. 

"Jagi! Why are you making a fort?" She asked, while a grin was being painted on her once gloomy face. 

"It's not precisely how we planned it initially," You took the remote and changed over to Netflix. "But how do you say we take advantage of this, and have that movie date we talked about?" 

Her eyes sparked as her grin grew from ear to ear, just as the bell ringed, with all your favorite snacks at your door ready to have a fun binging date. Part of her couldn't believe she was so lucky to have a partner as sweet and incredible as you, but if it was a dream in any way, she prayed she never woke up from it. 

Yuna

Usually, when someone has a cold it wears them off, tiring them, making them look like walking zombies. Not Yuna! Of course not! If all, you looked even more tired of keeping up with her energy even if she was the one with the cold. But you knew her, she's just like that. And to be honest, from the beginning you weren't really trying to maintain her on the bed, you knew it was going to be impossible. 

But your deal consisted of her staying home and not making anything really vigorous, you took on the tasks of reminding her of the meds she had to take throughout the day, cooking her warm soup, making hot tea and supplying with enough tissues needed. But she wasn't keen on just watching the TV and letting you do all the hard work alone! So wherever you were, she was always there right besides you, talking her soul out through her sore throat about funny anecdotes with her members. 

Finally the sun set up on the horizon as you both sat in bed watching some of her favorite dramas eating some light and warm dinner. You still didn't totally understand how she was able to keep jumping from side to side over the bed, but you watched her joyfully as she did. The night was young when she slammed into your body, cuddling down with you when she let out a deep sigh. 

"Thank you for taking such good care of me Y/n." She whispered as she tightened her grip around you. 

"It's always my pleasure Jagi." You caressed her hair lightly, running her strands through your fingers. "What would you like to eat tomorrow?" 

But you received no response back after a while. You looked down at the girl in your arms, her closed eyes and gentle smile laying on your chest, as her heavy breath gave up that she had finally run out of energy.

[persephoneyss]

Bad Movie.

Pairing: Jung Hoseok x f! Reader. Ft. Jungkook.

Genre: Yandere, dark themes, angst, gore a little.

Summary: ❝Looking for the person you love, beautiful woman.❞

Warnings: Yandere behavior, obsession, harassment / stalking, humiliation, forced marriage, non-sexual intercourse, abuse of power, implicit murder, drug use naming, minor past master / pet relationships, secondary character abduction, ugly hallucinating hoseok , beatings, blood, photos depicting abuse, mistreatment and death, bribery, sexism and humiliation (directly aimed at female prostitutes), hoseok mistreats and humiliates jk, awkward marriage proposals, use namjoon as a secondary character because it hurts more:(, etc.

Number of words: 6000+

︙Author's Note: This is my longest fic so far, I think. It took a lot for me to do it, especially since I didn't have a clear idea about the whole plot that would take and the role that each character would develop. So if you see Jungkook in a kind of strange character, blame my mind for including him almost last. Also, I hate Hoseok in this fic. Namjoon angel and fallen soldier, by the way let me know if they cried with his death, it hurt me to write it. Thank you very much for the 200 notes in my previous fic, I'm crying.

Read the Warnings well and enjoy!

(Sorry for any mistakes, my first language is not English and I am not fluent either.)

Puedes leer este fic y más aquí en español.

Confidence, a beautiful and treacherous feeling at times.

Feeling superior is a constant whisper of the ego within you, calling to be released and make others feel as what they really are, despicable and useless trash. It was fun laughing at losers when you haven't had that sense of defeat yet.

Hoseok fervently watched his rivals fall at his feet, laughing at his incompetence and stomping even more pathetic defeated form even though they were already dead in tears of pain. He smiled, he always did when he felt invincible and He bit his lip gently to hold back an excited laugh.

No one could be compared to him, and in his high sense of power he could never be alert when he struck him with a blast of vengeance.

It was you.

His eyes stared at you in horror and anger, his ego inside him hated you from the first moment. Because while despicable, he loved you for much more than his pride and winning sense.

He fell at your feet but he never made you notice it, behaving as he normally would around you even though he was always behind you.

Luck was her greatest ally, he always smiled at her and she helped him. It was fun to play with your opponents pretending to be the victim, the cornered mouse and then smash everyone with a snap of your fingers.

His mother looked at him with love and his father with pride, he was the only and favorite son of the Jung family. His success was never derived from love, much less, it was blasphemy in his family to say something so false and impossible.

Hoseok admired his family when they met in the great message of his parents' house, his grandparents smiled and his relatives brought out their most exquisite stories to entertain. They were all crows pretending to show interest in a prestigious place in the will of the family's monarch, his grandfather.

It was at one of those dinners that he got to meet you, he used to get bored of hearing his cousins ​​tell their anecdotes with prostitute women who mostly called, whores of a night. Mocking their shocked faces when they refused to pay them and threw them out of their big luxurious houses.

He rolled his eyes when a family friend, little Jungkook who was known to his father because of his prestige in his last name, chimed in trying to get into the conversation with a shy smile.

Lucky bastard, he thought bitterly. He didn't like the little idiot sticking his hands in boiling water, he wasn't even supposed to be there.

He hummed a goodbye as he walked out the front doors, walking aimlessly to his bored eyes. His feet stopped abruptly with a strangled sigh when he first saw you, you looked tired as you apparently searched for a key inside your bag. Could visualize the logo on your shirt from the grocery store where he assumed you were employed, He stood looking for what seemed like an eternity at you before you find the keys and rush through the back door. He snorted before lazily continuing on his way, however the next day he ended up following in your footsteps again and with even more confidence.

It took a few weeks for him to be able to enter the small commerce store and be able to look you face to face for the first time, it was expected that you would serve him with a smile asking if he was offered something. But he did not see you anywhere, he looked for you before another equally young woman approached him kindly, he sighed making a face of disgust surprising the she worker, his expensive shoes got dirty on the floors of the humble place with shame. His little investigation and search took him through many corridors of the establishment, he observed the shelves and each person who seemed to be wearing the uniform of the store thinking of finding you distracted with your work, maybe he thought of approaching you and asking for directions which he clearly didn't need. Knowing that  she you couldn't refuse because that was your job. In a way, you were there to serve him.

He let out a bored sigh, tired of playing hide and seek, he turned around ready to leave that place that disgusted him so much in a certain way, but once again he stopped in an instant. It was a moan. He clenched his fists, walking hurriedly to the place where the noise came from, he was sure it was your voice and that made him even more angry thinking that he would find you in a compromising position with someone.

He did not think that his lover would be such a stupid and dirty person.

You were crouched on the floor, grimacing with pain and exhaustion. You seemed very annoyed trying to lift a box with your arms, the scene was tender and certainly pathetic, she smiled noticing that you were so distracted that you were never aware of how I was watching you with carnal desire and painfully bad adoration.

"I-can I help you." He was surprised at his little babble, justifying himself later. Nobody ever managed to make him nervous, his father used to despise weak people and certainly he always sought his approval by doing things that were not correct. "They seem heavy."

Your face pale before the scare, turning into a face of shame quickly, you shook your head with a gentle movement, smiling still pained. "I'm fine sir. Can I help you? Maybe he got lost, let me guide-..."

"Actually, I do need help but not with your services." I speak in disagreement, you seemed confused but she nodded at his request. The customer is always right, right? How convenient. "I need you to allow me to help you with that heavy box, not to be rude or calling you weak miss, but you can't seem to handle it."

Lie, under his politically correct excuse was a dialogue about how insufficient you are even with things as easy and common as carrying a box, obviously you needed his help and Hoseok could give you that and more, much more. You just had to say it, it was so simple and fun.

"I -... I can do it, but i will accept your help sir ..." He smiled making an emphasis for he to give him his name, he let out a small laugh finishing his sentence.

“Hoseok, you can call me Hoseok, darling..." He mock imitating his position, your name left your lips like a melody and he immediately felt the sweet taste of it slide down his tongue. Beautifully perfect, indeed. "Now that we can finish the introductions please allow me."

Her expensive outfit crumpled as she bent down to lift the box with ease, you were once again oblivious to her incoherent and certainly crazy fantasies, it was like a romance comedy movie in her eyes. The charming fellow always stays with the girl. And likewise, no one could go against the fictional plot.

He was immersed in the beautiful narrative that you would be hers at the end of the credits.

It was not the last time she saw you, she returned to her same routine of continuing to stalk you with obvious impudence. The only thing that really changed was her new setting and her character, he was hiding between the shelves waiting for the right moment to appear in front of you with a charming smile. Over and over, he was locked in an infinite loop.

He was starting to get tired of just having you in his arms and sheets just in his heavy and lustful dreams.

"A date? How funny Hoseok."

His face twisted in annoyance, but he put on a fake smile again when you looked at him again. "Hobi." He corrected in a high-pitched voice, insisting that you call him that. "And she spoke very seriously my dear, everything is ready."

"Eh ... I -..." A simple wave of her hands was enough to shut you up, you frown in confusion and secretly disgusted.

"On Saturday, I'll send you the address of the restaurant. Goodbye, dear!"

You watch it for a few seconds but he's already gone, you resign yourself to continuing with your work of ordering the products on the shelves. Thinking and trying to remember when you gave him your number. A very characteristic noise distracts you, a call makes you smile with love and adoration.

The plot is taking an interesting turn.

Hoseok was charming by nature, his economic position made him even more desirable to the opposite gender and even his own. It was not strange to see people flirting with him or being suggestive with his proposals, he was on a pedestal and he enjoyed it. His subconscious whispered a little bored. I couldn't deny that he became boring in a way, but you appeared in the story as an extra who soon became a main character. You changed the script of his life already established and narrated.

You were so funny.

He smiled in front of the mirror when he thought of you, since he met you that day he started chatting with you secretly from your supervisor. You had told him several anecdotes to make him laugh, you were also naturally charming pulling out various expressions of adoration that you did not even notice. Oblivious to that, you'd better get ready for the climax of the movie.

The wind was strong in the streets of Seoul, your hair was noticeably messy causing you to let out a tired sigh. You should be planning your wedding banquet right now, but you honestly didn't want to leave Hoseok alone at the dinner he had organized. You put the invitation in your bag, thinking of giving it to her when the time was right with a smile. He seemed like a good person and undoubtedly a good friend in the future.

"You're on time, I was just about to order our food. Honey." The last word slid down his tongue with malice and arrogance, Hoseok inwardly chuckling at your disengaged expression.

"Thanks, but don't stop you can order for both." You say arranging your chair correctly.

The restaurant looked relatively empty, there were only three other people including a couple who ate dinner while chatting enthusiastically.

You smile unconsciously, thinking about what would also make you feel the same way.

"I was looking forward to this dinner, my dear. I also hoped I could tell you how much you have captivated me for a long time, specifically since the first day I saw you." And the others too, he thought shifting your posture.

"Thank you, I'm very flattered to cause that feeling ... in, good in you." You whisper clearly uncomfortable forcing yourself to stay calm. You were sure that you had never given a hint or anything else in Hoseok to establish romantic feelings. "But I-... "

"I know, darling. That is why I have to offer you the opportunity to be my girlfriend and my future wife."

Wife?

For a moment, you feel a rush through your body. You refuse to make a scene in front of all the few people present out of respect, you calm down by counting to ten slowly in your head, but it becomes very difficult for you as you continue to observe his comfortable smile and how he behaves. He seemed very sure of the affirmative respect you would give him, you snort angrily at the thought.

"I am sorry to have been misunderstood Mr. Hoseok, but I am not seeking a relationship with you and very sorry I reject any relationship beyond friendship." Your body lifts up, making Hoseok laugh well in advance of your final sentences. "I am engaged and my future husband is waiting for me, good afternoon."

Trembling, you leave the invitation in silence, leaving the luxurious premises in the same way. The waiters watching you with surprise, being an audience of rejection and humiliation on your part. Hoseok sighs, sipping his wine glass patiently pretending not to hear what the couple behind him are saying.

What a bad luck.

Life wanted to want to return all his damn vanity to him, making fun of him with your almost imminent rejection, obviously he knew that you were engaged and that you loved the poor man who had the bad luck to be his competition, but love is not always the important thing in a relationship or at least not of both parties. The voices of the waiters and the couple distract him from his plans for his next step, he clenches his fists angrily dropping the silverware on the plate calling the attention of everyone in the place.

"Filthy vulgar and talkative people, she will be my wife even if her words have been heard by her prying ears." He raised his voice, causing everyone to shut up. "It's just part of the script."

Maybe if the character who wanted to be the main loses the role of him, he should be the villain. The bad guy in the movie.

He read the invitation with meticulous delicacy, laughing at the little message you put aside. He thought about attending for a second, wondering if it would be nice to walk in to go straight to the altar and shoot your husband willing to take his place by your side. But that would be risky.

"Where are we going, sir?" He asked his driver with a smile.

"Take me to the best brothel in Seoul." He whispered delicately, smiling just as happily as before your rejection. I'd make you pay double the bill for your indulgence.

And likewise, the world is a truly small place. Jungkook nodded clearly uncomfortable obeying someone other than Mr. Jung. Hoseok cornered him like a helpless rabbit in the claws of a cunning fox, flashing his jaw in warning. He felt confused about his little assigned task, watching the direction pointing the right way to his chauffeur who only followed orders.

A small feeling of remorse ran through him, making him want to vomit when he remembered how Hoseok's face was so close to his with arrogance, as his hands roamed his arms gently. He was disgusting how he used his power to such a useless and demanding gain, sometimes without any realism.

"Little Jungkook, you have a very lovely name. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, you were so insignificant that you seemed pathetic to me." He whispered making her wince. "My father told me that you are good at obeying, I would like to test his theory." His cold hands were constantly running down his arms, making a shiver run through his body. "Still remembering well, I already did it before."

Jungkook was weak under his cloak of power, where he could so easily hide it. Lose it. "Yes, h-hyung." An inappropriate moan came from his lips causing him to cover her mouth in shame, a little touch near his crotch was enough to tempt him. Hoseok smirked, narrowing his eyes before walking away slowly wiping his fingers on his expensive clothes in disgust.

"I want you to befriend someone, don't ask, just do it. I'll tell you your next step when you're done." He ordered bored.

"We are here, young Jeon." Notice Jimin with a smile, Jungkook sighed wearily thanking him before getting out of the car ready to fulfill his mission.

I observe him for a few seconds standing in the entrance without doing anything, he was cleaning the windows of the building with force. He seemed like a nice person, certainly a bit humble. He approached making the man bow respectfully, even though he was older. Money can buy everything, they say.

"I am young Jeon, a new investor. May I have a chat with you?"

The man was surprised, no one who was someone by name and a few numbers along with several zeros would be able to notice his presence and at least greet him. A coffee sounded more intimate and undoubtedly inconvenient for him, but again out of respect he accepted the offer with a smile adorning his features.

"My name is Jungkook informally, but I like you and you can call me that." He spoke kindly.

"Namjoon, Mr. Je -... I'm sorry, Jungkook." He corrected sheepishly, making her smile.

He still didn't understand that he planned to do Hoseok with a building cleaner, but he didn't feel in a position worth asking. Furthermore, he would still not receive an honest answer.

He passed by the same place every day, pretending to enter the building only so he could meet Mr. Kim and talk about unimportant subjects. He gained his trust almost immediately, promising that he would give her a better job soon at his own company. He felt like an idiot taking advantage of the man in front of him in such a way for a simple whim from Hoseok.

He was an idiot, but he didn't want to go back to what he was before. A pet.

"I'm very happy, I think she will make a good wife." He responded with encouragement, seeing how Namjoon nodded looking for a picture of his fiancée to show him. He seemed excited, Jungkook understood his happiness after he explained that he saved for a long time to achieve his dream of getting married in a church. They were both in it together, in looking for a future.

He got lost in his thoughts, maybe if he lied to Hoseok about gaining trust from him, saying that Namjoon was a very cold and quiet man, he could make him forget about it. He sighed squeezing the coffee cup in his hands, Namjoon caught his attention by showing a photo of you smiling at the camera with a background of the bridge and the sun behind making a beautiful background.

Jungkook became alert, having seen that face before.

Hoseok had you as the wallpaper on his phone, he knew it was you because of your characteristic features and the scarf you wore in both photos. You were the new fad of a rich fool.

"T-is ... She's so cute, you're very lucky."

Namjoon nodded with a smile, apologizing before returning to his work upon being called by his supervisor. Jungkook put aside his cup feeling the bitter taste of his thoughts, Hoseok was planning something, he knew he was a son of a bitch who liked to keep his plans under lock and key and in a deep grave. He walked away calling for Jimin quickly, before being accosted by Namjoon who came running over, seemingly forgetting something of the utmost importance.

"I apologized Mr. Jeon, but I wanted to give you this personally. It is an invitation, in addition to the proposal to be the best man at our wedding. My fiancee said that it would be appropriate for me to choose someone and I decided that you were perfect, you can decline if you prefer. . " He spoke kindly, as always. Namjoon seemed to have no hatred in his heart, making his own feel heavy on his chest.

Could he bear the blame?

"It's my pleasure to accept her proposal, thank you for considering me. Good afternoon, namjoon-hyung."

He said goodbye by getting into the car as fast as he could, making Jimin look at him with derision. Obviously noticing his nervousness, Jungkook sighed hiding the invitation as much as he could before reading Hoseok's message ordering him to go to his house to sort out his affairs.

It seemed like a joke as he always looked so flawless, ready to humiliate him again.

"Jungkookie, I'm glad to see you again. Now, we'd better come in for our talk." He smiled making anger grow inside him, Hoseok sat on one of his expensive furniture before pouring himself a glass of wine. "Well, I heard from a little bird that you accomplished your task. Good pet."

"Don't call me that, hyung." He grunted in annoyance, making him laugh. "I can't go through with this, I did what you wanted. Leave Namjoon-hyung alone."

"Oh, they're close now really cute. But you forget that I can't fulfill your wish, because "Namjoon-hyung " is an essential piece in my little game." I speak mocking him as always. "Then we will move on to the next step ..." He thinking for a moment, before snapping his fingers. "Invite him to a bachelor party night at the brothel in the center, I already made the reservation. When they are there, leave him alone. A whore will take care of him properly, and maybe you can go make him a oral another yourself." He sneered evilly, reminding her of his past, Jungkook bit his tongue resisting the urge to respond properly. "Since you're clearly good at it, little pet."

"Yes, hyung."

Hoseok nodded saying for him to leave asap, tired of seeing his stupid face. He got up ready to do so, but his arm was taken tightly before bringing his face closer to hers, Hoseok let out a sigh, doing he could smell his breath of mint and wine combined. His hand lowered him into his pockets dangerously close to his crotch, he bit his lower lip to resist a moan escaping him, this had happened before and he begged it to stop forever. From his pocket, she pulled the invitation out, making her gasp in horror.

"Godfather of wedding, new facet of you... kookie." Rolling he eyes pushing him away from him, he fell to the ground before being met by a blow to his cheek. "What a shitty pet, you idiot."

Two days was enough for you to tremble at the thought. Your dress was proud to be seen, it was the most comfortable dress you could find at a fair price. Namjoon tried to enter but he was stopped by your friend who said that he will wait until you keep the dress out of his sight avoiding bad luck. A smile wavered on your face, everything was perfect up to a point.

Namjoon looked at you, a blush covering his cheeks before asking his obvious question. You didn't expect him to want a bachelor party, but you couldn't refuse because you simply trusted him.

Maybe it was your mistake.

You wished him luck, feeling an inexplicable emptiness. Your friends didn't offer to make one for you, they just sat on the couch in their living room talking about movies and arguing about what color the cake would be. It was the calm before the storm.

Jungkook felt a giant headache, the lights of the place were making him dizzy. Jimin had insisted on going with him to such an 'unusual' place to keep him safe. Namjoon had brought a couple of friends who seemed to be always close to him preventing the woman who did the job Hoseok had him do from becoming difficult.

He smiled, thinking that he would have no choice but to let it go. But Hoseok was not a good loser, and neither was he a good winner.

Hoseok:

He distracts his friends, and be careful what you say, kookie.

Received at 11:30 p.m.

He bit his lip, glancing around the bar, thinking he'd find him sitting somewhere spying on everything but nothing looked suspicious. He sighed, sending Jimin out for drinks with one of Namjoon's friends who he gladly accepted. He got up having pushed one away, the other who introduced himself as Jackson seemed more reluctant to leave his friend alone but with a few excuses about feeling bad managed to get him out of sight.

Believed that he would find Namjoon sitting right where he was before but no, he was gone. He felt a burning feeling of guilt, maybe if you didn't find out, nothing would happen.

"You're still the same as before, boss." Jimin sat down next to him, making him uncomfortable.

"Same as before? I am no longer a child."

"But you continue to obey as one. The manipulation they use on you is your greatest weakness, you are afraid, you obey without hesitation thinking about how this will indirectly affect you. But you never do anything to avoid it, you feel bad about this but you still sit here without doing nothing."

"What can I do, Jimin? I don't know if he really left by his will, or if they forced him. I don't want to enter a room in this dirty place and see him sleeping with another woman, because he wanted to and is a fucking infidel . "

Jimin ignored his words, falling silent after several seconds.

Feeling unhappy is a horrible feeling without a doubt. The curious eyes looked at you as if they themselves could judge your story.

Namjoon disappeared as quickly as the wind, many sharp tongues said that he eloped with a lover so as not to marry you. Others believed it was a kidnapping, maybe a robbery gone wrong and he was taken away or he was killed somewhere far away. A sob escaped you just thinking about it, the detective in front of you watched you cautiously.

"We don't know anything about him yet, but we will continue with the investigations."

You nod, without saying a word. Jungkook came in minutes later with a handkerchief in hand, he observed you before gently hugging you. You had the pleasure of meeting him after Namjoon disappeared that night, he introduced himself as a close friend from work and quickly offered to help you with the search.

Maybe he felt guilt.

"Thanks, Jungkook." You smile wiping the tears that escape from your eyes.

"They are looking for the best they can, they even alerted the Japanese embassies in case they might take him there."

"Japan?" Puzzled questions. "Why would someone take him so far? He's just a man with little money, that's ridiculous."

"We don't know, but I promise I won't rest until I find it."

Hoseok sighs bored, witnessing the moment. He had been bribing the bloody police force to hide the information from you about the discovery of your fiancé's corpse floating in the middle of the waters of the river where they used to go together. The only thing that was removed intact from his clothes was a small photo of you smiling, sitting on the banks of the same river.

The police mourned the death, but his faces left grief when they saw the money in his hands. He made fun of Jungkook as usual, who passed by him ignoring him when he went to his house to talk to his father, he knew that the useless little one was very meddlesome in the search for your future husband and ex-fiance. He rolled her eyes remembering how she used to look at him with discontent in meetings, suspicious of him.

He was a good detective, he couldn't deny the obvious.

"You didn't have to do this, a I'm sorry was enough." You say admiring all the bouquets of flowers that came to your house from him. "And I'm sorry for your loss."

He wasn't sorry.

"My dear, losing a loved one is something without a name. I can give you more than this if you promise to smile again, I love your smiles."

Jungkook snorts approaching you from behind, Hoseok to growl at noticing him so close and see how he puts his hand on your shoulder, apparently like support.

"Hyung, he didn't think it's a good time for ... That."

"But little kook, when is not a good time to express how you feel about your loved one?"

"When that person you say you love is crying over the loss of someone special because of evil people who don't know what remorse is. Do you understand that, hyung?"

"No, not really." He laughs cynically making you lose your patience, your little body comes between the two men, with one already furious and the other inadvertently giving up, you make a face of annoyance before speaking.

"Sirs!" You yell at him immediately, Jungkook steps back adjusting his tie. A mania that he had and that you noticed when he presented himself in front of you with regret, he did it when he was uncomfortable or nervous. "This is not the time to argue, I think you'd better leave my house if you're just wasting your time. Thanks for the flowers Hoseok, and Jungkook ... I, I want to continue the investigation on my own."

"That?!"

"What you heard, don't feel responsible for Namj's disappearance -..." You tremble correcting your words, making Hoseok scoff. "My husband, he was just at the wrong time in the wrong place. Thanks for your help, I'll see how to pay you very soon." Jungkook denies trying to insist but fails when you are already closing the door and giving him an apologetic smile.

Your breath feels heavy, you sigh falling to the ground sobbing again. You wanted to find Namjoon, but a large part of you was afraid of how. Dead, with another woman, with serious injuries or simply ... Alive but with trauma for life. You did not want to see him suffer, it was your judgment in life to see the person you love cry in his pain.

You observe yourself, telling yourself that you would be fine when you find it.

Your email seems to explode with thousands of messages received from people claiming to have seen a man like Namjoon near their homes. You ignore them knowing that most of them were false, the first few days you read all of them giving the police false clues that they quickly denied and dismissed.

You dry your tears, closing all the windows and cooking a simple instant soup, eating in absolute silence. It was overwhelming feeling alone at home, where you were supposed to feel safe indoors.

The rain, thunder, and evil outside seemed to be invisible within that place.

A chill runs through you, the control of the television seemed tempting to calm that neat silence and avoid your boredom. You give up turning on the TV, you see the first channel, you keep changing looking for the unknown, you didn't know what you wanted to see. Maybe a newscast saying they found a tall man with dark brown hair and charming eyes unconscious, with a couple of blows to the face and a few scratches but okay, safe, alive and waiting to see your face waiting for him with a warm smile.

Swearing never ever to let go.

A couple of tears slide down your cheek, ruining your fast food. A few knocks on the door manage to scare you, causing you to bite your lip in anger.

"Who is?!" Questions in a shout.

Nothing.

"It better be good ..." You say in muttered, you open the door expecting to see a child running to his house laughing at his childish joke.

But no, there is no one at the door. Just a small envelope that easily slipped underneath, you take it hoping it's a letter from the police announcing good news. Maybe a simple identification of suspicious faces, or footprints at the club.

"I hate being the bad guy, it makes me feel good.

He's dead, I did it for you. For me. For us. I want to make you happy but it's so difficult when I don't know what you want, tell me what you want.

Love you. Love you. Love you.

My heart is so weak in your cold eyes, I feel that you look at me with ignorance of my feelings. Do you want to find it? Do you want to do it?! Okay. Good luck with it. "

It was everything, plus a picture of a golden ring with a large diamond shining brightly. You wrinkle the letter in anger, tossing it into the first bin you found nearby. It seems that in the end, someone did want to joke with you.

Your days remained the same, you went out to work and in the afternoons you called each of the investigators to ask for new news, it was almost always a solid wall, there was nothing really important to report and little by little, they gave up.

Jungkook knocked on the door, he heard some footsteps approaching making him have a little hope. But when the door opened he saw you with a worried face, he felt his heart squeeze in his chest when he tried to get closer but you avoid him by leaving in a hurry. You were dressed in a long black skirt and a white blouse, you were elegantly ready for something.

"Where are you going?" He ask stopping your hurried pace, taking your arm tightly.

"Yo, listen... He... Or her, I don't know who it is but ... You know, he or her know where, he's alive I know. I just don't have time, please."

Your mouth moves wiht fear, you were hiding something but not from him. You were willing to tell him but not now. Not at that time.

"Let me accompany you, I can take you and I will feel better if you are safe."

You nod, letting go of his grip and running down the stairs, outside there is a very elegant car, apparently waiting. The driver smiles at you as if he had known you before, you make an uncomfortable face trying to continue on your way but Jungkook introduces him saying that he works for him.

"Jimin, he's Jimin. He's a good person and a great friend, I've told him about you before."

"I see, sorry." You speak with a bow before climbing to the back, Jimin just smiles kindly, as always.

"Where are we going today?" He asks animatedly, Jungkook takes your hand for support making Jimin remove the smile from him. Your nervous state and your afflicted face are enough for him to understand the situation.

You give him an address, Jimin searches the map being unknown to the place. Your eyes sparkle when the lights of Seoul are reflected in them, Jungkook holds your hand tightly in fear of letting you go again. He felt sick when you stopped calling him, cutting connections with him totally to this day. He spend sleepless nights looking for more clues, the only thing I had until that moment was the identity of the woman, she was a prostitute without anything special, when he spoke with her he seemed indifferent saying that he did not know Namjoon and that the last time he saw him It was when he drugged him and left him in a room as ordered.

The whore made fun of him saying that he would give him this information if he did not tell the police anything, he obviously accepted. Now he repented, the woman disappeared after that and days later she was found in a garbage container. It seemed to be a suicide, the container was from her building, the window of her old apartment faced just where she was supposed to fall if she threw herself without thinking twice.

Right in the garbage.

The wheels of the car made a thud when it stopped, it was a cabin, the only one nearby. You came down quickly thanking Jimin who just made a flirty face. Your hands trembled with the cold, you look at the letter that tells you where and when you should be standing at the door.

"Wait for me here, if we don't go out or you hear noises, you know who to call."

"Yes sir!" Jimin obeys with a laugh at the boss's serious tone of him.

"Y-you should go, I can do this alone." Your voice rises in the echo of the silent place, Jungkook rolls his eyes before offering his arm to you, making his decision clear.

You laugh calming your nerves, the door opens just as you both step close to it. A man stops them, saying that only you can enter the next room. You stop Jungkook who was to protest, you calm him down by leaving your ring in his hands with a smile.

Your body disappears when another man closes the door silently, Jungkook sighs looking annoyed at the guards who ignore him.

A message coming to his phone distracts him for a few seconds.

Jimin:

Should I call the police, Mr. Jung, or the hospital?

Received at 9:35 p.m.

Smile ready to answer before hearing the door open again, he approaching you to ask everything and at the same time nothing. Your pale face is enough to make want to hit the person who was inside with you. Questions remain in the air, your arms surround him while you sob for forgiveness.

From the shadows Hoseok smiles, admiring the document in his hand, your signature shiny as gold is glued to it. He thought it would be more difficult to convince you to accept his marriage proposal, but the precious and expensive ring fit you perfectly. He raised his hand proudly admiring his own, the wedding would be planned as soon as possible making him jump like a happy child.

You had accepted, with the promise that he would bring you back to Namjoon.

But it was never specified in the contract that he would be alive.

The wedding was in a meadow, outdoors with distinguished guests and a few friends and family of yours. Hoseok greeted everyone, by taking your hand tightly introducing you as his wife immediately. It's as if he wants to show everyone that you now belong to him, as if you were a prize.

And maybe if you gave him the key to her success.

"You better smile my dear, nobody wants to know what will happen if you don't." Her lips brushed your hand before placing a chaste kiss on it. "I love you, my beautiful protagonist."

You sob, tears falling from your face as you melt into his disgusting caresses. The man in front of you, your un-predestined husband. The one who stole the position of your true love, he was kissing you delicately.

"Don't cry, decorate the room just the way you wanted. The photos were a special touch ..." His teeth bit into the sensitive skin of your neck, an involuntary groan of pain escaping. "Love you."

Your eyes move desperately to find a photo where the beaten, abused or dead body of Namjoon cannot be seen. You scream when you find one where you see blood everywhere, you are resigned to look down at the ground where Hoseok was crouching kissing the inside of your thighs.

Your mind tried to process the idea that Namjoon had been killed, mutilated and thrown into a river that washed away his body along with happy memories. Farewell to him was prolonged as your body faded in pain.

Hoseok enjoyed the sight of your eyes tightly closed, his cock throbbing inside you as she fucked you like his wife.

The head of the bed moved crashing into the wall, and unconsciously your walls tightened around it causing it to release a curse aloft to the sky.

We got to the end of the movie, smiled as he dazzled the credits by seeing Jungkook's lost name. His little bitch who was his toy for many years, laughed remembering how she did wonders with her mouth.

He pretended not to know him when her father introduced him, taunting her hurt face.

He held you in his arms tightly, you had been struggling to free yourself from his grip as he continued to abuse you over-stimulating your pussy. Your eyes closed falling asleep from crying so much.

He caressed your face, kissing your dry, chapped lips.

The end.

[cinnamon-bebe]

Chemtrails (Pedro Pascal x Fem!Reader)

Chemtrails (Pedro Pascal X Fem!Reader)

Summary: "If you died today, would you be happy with the life you've lived?" What happens when you've sacrificed your love for fame and fortune? Despite the glitz and glamour, the Reader is all Pedro can think about. The stars have never been on your side but can you rewrite the plans they have for you?

Warning: Angst, Fluff, Occasional Cursing

Inspired by the song Chemtrails Over the Country Club by Lana Del Rey

"I'm on the run with you, my sweet love

There's nothing wrong contemplating God

Under the chemtrails over the country club"

"Baby what's your sign?"

"You're in the wind, I'm in the water

Nobody's son, nobody's daughter

Watching the chemtrails over the country club"

Pedro's POV

The chatter of a hundred people and yet I still only hear your voice. Memories of your words, from years past.

You asked me what my sign was, I told you I was an Aries. You laughed and told me we shouldn't be friends, the stars say so. The stars say we're incompatible, we'd be at each other's throats. I'm a fire sign and you didn't need any more drama. I kissed you for the first time and told you I'd prove you wrong, you simply smiled and looked off to the chemtrails that flew over us.  

Memories from years past.

I didn't have much to offer you but I told you that you could take my word. At that time, it was worth more than anything I could have given you.

"You want me to defy the stars?" You raised an eyebrow, a smile teasing your face.

"The stars can go fuck themselves." I told you and kissed you again.

We were so young. We were nobodies. Running through the concrete jungle, with your hand in mine. Sun dress and kisses at midnight convenience stores, splitting a hot dog on a summer day because we needed money for the show at 7.

We used to contemplate the meaning of life over a bottle on our little balcony. I asked you if you were happy and you smiled but did not reply.

"If you died today, would you be happy with the life you've lived?" You asked me instead.

"No." I told you. "There's so much more I want to do. I want to be somebody."

I didn't know it then but that was the moment I started to lose you.

Memories from years past.

I find myself sitting at a restaurant now, with more money to line my pockets, pats on the back from strangers. People know my name and it comes out in whispers, as they stare over their expensive plate, getting cold just to catch a glimpse of me.

A beautiful woman sits across from me. As if a movie star isn't a big enough draw, a woman like her only invites more gazes. She looks like she'd just stepped off a screen herself. She gives me all her attention, so much so that she does not register the envious stares from the others around her.

Her lips are moving, perhaps a funny anecdote came to mind or is she telling me about her sister's wedding again that she mentioned before?  I cannot tell you, for my mind is elsewhere, with someone else.

"So would you like to come?" She smiles brightly at me, her perfect teeth sitting between her lips, painted in a dusty pink.  

"Huh?" I snap out of my daze, embarrassed that I was clearly not paying attention.

"Jule's wedding, did you...want to be my date for the day?" She blushes, hopeful.

"Oh. I...uh. I don't know Kate. I have a pretty packed schedule coming up, I don't know if I'll have time." I try to make up an excuse.

"It's too early isn't?" She bites her lip sheepishly. "I'm sorry, I know we've only been dating for a few weeks, I shouldn't have sprung this up on you so fast."

"No no, please don't be silly. I love weddings!" I try to laugh it off. "It's just that, with the new movie coming up, I need to start preparing before we go into production."

"I understand." She nods with a smile, "Comes with the territory when you're dating a big movie star I guess." She looks at me, I'm not sure if she's anticipating a response but I reciprocate with a grin and wave at the waiter for another drink.

Soon enough, she excuses herself from the table to go to the ladies room and I'm left sitting alone at our spot. I grow tiresome of the incessant chattering from the tables around me and I massage the temples of head, wishing I was at home in the comfort of my bed with just the company of my television.

I see glances from a small table to the side of me, a group of young women clearly too shy to ask for a photograph, egging each other on to make the first move over to me. Their hopes quickly dashed as I feel a firm hand on my shoulder, turning me around.

"Pedro?" A familiar voice calls my name.

"Anthony! Fancy seeing you here!" My eyes widen as I pull an old friend down for a hug.

"It's my anniversary with Charlize, we're just celebrating! God I haven't seen you for so long!" He shakes his head, slowly looking me up and down, examining my so-called transformation. I've aged so much since we last we saw each.

"How long have you been here?" I ask.

"A couple of hours, I actually saw you before but I..uh...I didn't want to interrupt your date."

Date? I swallow the word whole.

"You lucky man. She's very pretty." He comments.

"Yeah, she is."

"You could seem a bit more interested though but those are Charlize's words, not mine." He raises his hands up, letting his wife take the blame.

"I must seem like an ass, don't I?" Poor Kate, how spoilt am I to show a woman like her so little interest. "I haven't dated for so long, it's just hard getting back into the scene that's all."

Anthony let's out an inaudible "oh" and I know he's thinking the same thing, I can practically hear the name sitting on his tongue, desperately wanting to come out. 

"How is Y/N?" I break the ice, allowing the elephant in the room an escape before he suffocates along with me.

"She's good, very good actually. She's a documentary film maker now. Her work is amazing, you'd love it." Anthony couldn't help his excitement when speaking about you and I feel an intense pang of sadness and jealousy seeing his eyes light up. To see you, celebrate you. I wonder if you've aged like me or do you still look the same as how I remember. Do you still crinkle your nose every time you hear a bad joke? Do your eyes still get red and glassy when you look at the sky because you're wondering if anyone's looking down on you? I wish I knew.

"Listen, I have to go." Anthony looks back at his wife who gives me a polite wave from a distance.

"It was really good seeing you Anthony, I'm sorry we haven't spoken all these years. It's just with work..." I recycle that old excuse again.

"Don't worry about it...you made it! I know you worked really hard to get where you are now. I know you had to make a lot of sacrifices..." The last sentence, spoken so softly, it was almost drowned out. "I'm genuinely happy for you."

I nod, giving my friend one last hug before I ready for him to turn and leave, instead he hesitates and looks at me.  

"Hey Pedro?"

"Yeah?"

"She still lives in the neighbourhood." He looks down at the scarf in his hand before patting me on my arm. "Just so you know."

With that, he waves me goodbye. Walking back to his wife, who he wraps his arm around. The way she naturally rests into him and slips her hand into his coat pocket as they exit the restaurant, I wonder if I'd ever have that level of intimacy with Kate.  

__________________________________________________

I sent her home in a taxi. "I have an early morning and need to prep for some meetings", my excuse for her this time. Kate's disappointed expression, as I gave her a kiss on the cheek is the last thing on my mind.

Scuffing the cap of my leather shoes, I kick at the pavement. The world moves past me as I hide myself in the bubble of my thoughts. I have no sense of direction, my legs taking me to no intended destination, only letting the neon lights around guide me to where it desires.

Anthony's words were still ringing in my ears.

Would you want to see me?

My mind reminds me of the last time we were together.

"I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this, if I don't leave the city now, I may never get my chanc-"

"Get your chance to do what? Be a star?" You were sat deep in the corner of the sofa, far from me. Your voice calm and monotonous as you watched me pace up and down our tiny apartment. I couldn't decipher your expression, it was as if you knew what I was going to say.

"I want to make something out of my life! I want to prove to everyone and myself that I can make it Y/N. I don't want to waste my life away." I moved towards you, our presence separated by the little vintage coffee table I hated but still bought home because you loved it so much.

"Well then go, I don't want to hold you back from chasing your dreams."

"Y/N-"

"No. It's okay Pedro. I understand...I really do. I don't want to stop you from pursuing what you love." You got up from your spot, you seemed so small to me as you closed the gap between us. Your hand felt so light against my face, like you were disappearing before me. "Don't live in regret because of me."

"Y/N come wi-" I tried to hold you, hold you before you evaporated.

"No. My place is here." You took your hand away, moved back, the space between us grew more and more distant. "I don't have big dreams like you do. I like normality. I like living my life however I want it, do whatever I want, whenever I want. You asked me if I was happy...and I am."

"Would you still be happy without me?"

I stared at you. My gut sank because I already knew this was the end. You didn't have to tell me.

"I don't know..." You managed to smile, even through the gentle tears that formed in your eyes. "But I know you would be without me."

"That's not true." I tried to reach for you but you pulled away.

"We're very different people Pedro...I told you, we're incompatible. It's time we listened to the stars."

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted as I feel a hand rest softly on the small of my back.

"Hello sir, would you like to buy a rose?" An elderly woman smiles up at me. A child stands obediently nearby, holding a bouquet of individually wrapped stems, clearly past his bedtime but still helping Grandma late at night. The child looks tired, sad. Judging by the number of roses still in his hands, they must have had an unlucky day.

"How much for one?" I return her kind smile, taking out my wallet.

"$2. Thank you, thank you so much sir." The old woman sighs in relief calling the child over to bring the flowers for me to pick. Each stem had a handwritten tag with various cheesy sentiments adorned.

....A kiss in exchange for a rose...

...You're more beautiful than any flower but here's one to show you my love anyway...

....Would you be my Valentine?...

....Please forgive me, I was an idiot.

I chuckle at the last one before picking a rose at random.

I take out $100 and watch the old lady's eyes panic as she reaches in her purse to find change. Taking her hand firmly in mine, I assure her it wasn't necessary.

"I'll take one rose for the $100. You keep the rest of the flowers and have a good night okay?"

The woman looks at the child with her mouth agape and then back at me, clearly taken aback by the gesture.

"Sir, are you sure?"

"Yes, take the kid home and get some rest. This one rose itself is worth every dollar." I pat her hand which trembles in mine.

"Thank you! Thank you! Bless you and the woman who receives your rose!"

Taking the child's hand they quickly walk away, whispering to each other and disappearing into the night.

I stare at the flower in my hand and bring it closer to my face, studying the message on the tag.

...Let's defy the stars and write our own destiny.

I stand in the dark of night, illuminated only by the cafe lights ready to turn off for the day. My hand grips the stem as if it weighed a hundred tons yet afraid it would float away like a feather. The frantic honking of the traffic seems to taunt me, the laughter from the bars nearby seem to be mocking this idiot of a man standing in the middle of the streets, holding a flower he paid $100 for.

"Just do it!" I hear a young boy shout at his friend attempting a skateboard trick up the block.

Just do it. I repeat to myself. Just fucking do it.

"Taxi!"

 _________________________________________________

I remember these steps, we used to sit here with the neighbours' kids. Charlie, I think that was his name? I remember little Charlie proposing to you with a plastic ring and threatening to get his kindergarten buddies on me, simply for existing. I can't help but laugh at that memory.

Everyone was in love with you, the young, the old. They couldn't help but fall for your charms, your kindness, the way you'd smile at them even if you've never spoken a word to each other. Everyone was under your spell, including me.

You told me you loved me on these steps.

I had gotten back from a bad audition and couldn't bear to go home to you. I sat here for hours until you saw me from the balcony and came down. You didn't ask me anything. You just sat with me as we watched the kids run up and down the block, racing each other, teasing each other. I looked at you and you gave me a kiss on the nose.

"I love you."

You said it so quietly at first that I pretended I didn't I understand.

You rolled your eyes and pulled my face into yours, telling me you loved me over and over again as you smothered me with your kisses.

That was one of the happiest moments of my life.

Walking past our faded figures, I enter the building and see that nothing has changed.

The walls were the same duck egg green. The bulletin board covered in layers of flyers and advertisement, some new, with plenty dated months back. I wouldn't be surprised if the audition ads I tried out for from years ago were still there.

The smell of various cuisines mingle together to form its own unique indecipherable aroma.

A comforting aroma.

I look to the elevator, still out of order. Obviously.

We only lived on the third floor, the stairs will be fine.

I prepare myself for the incline when a voice calls out to me.

"Where are you going?"

I turn around and see our old building superintendent, decked out in his uniform. Stanley.

"Stan! It's me Pedro! Wow, you're still here!" I walk to him.

"Who?" He looks me up and down, completely confused as to who the hell I am.

"Pedro from 3B upstairs? I used to live with Y/N...maybe you don't remember me because of the moustache." I rub the bottom of my nose sheepishly.

"No...I don't remember you."

Old Stanley, perhaps age is catching up to him.

"I'm just going to see Y/N." I try to resume my journey but he stops me once more.

"No entry into the building if you're not a resident!" He points to the sign on the wall.

"Since when was that a rule?" I throw my hand in the air.

"Since today. We have too many unsavoury men try to come into the building, how do I know if you really know Miss Y/L/N? I'm not letting any potential predators or burglars into the building."

"But Stan she-"

Pointing to the sign on the wall again, he raises an angry brow. Not wishing a full body beat down by ol' Stan, I take myself back out the building like a bad dog.  

I sit on the steps, sighing in defeat. I try to convince myself that coming here is a mistake.

"Defy the stars...pfft! You've been in way too many movies Pedro." I mumble to myself, as I dig my thumb nail into the stem of the rose.

Perhaps we're only given the choice to rewrite our destiny but it doesn't mean destiny would just sit idly by and let you do whatever you want. It's probably for the best. What would I say anyway?

Running my hand through my hair, I get up to leave. The adrenaline from earlier had drained so quickly out of me, that its left me a fatigued mess. Move on Pedro, it's time to go home.

"Hey movie star." A voice calls from above. "You looking for me?"

Your hair falls past your face as you lean over the balcony and in that moment I feel my heart break into a million pieces.

There you are.

Standing before me, even more beautiful than when you left, if that is even possible.

You're wearing a simple white vest and grey shorts, one leg rubbing softly against the other. Your skin bears the warm orange glow reflected from the lights inside your apartment.

You look so raw, so delicate.

Every pulse in my body aches seeing you again.

"Wow." I breathe. "You look..."

You hide your laugh and I can see you blushing from behind your hand.

"Thanks. You look great too. I'm like the...um..." You rub under your nose with your finger.

"Thank you, I grew it out for a role but now people tell me I look like their grandma without it." I shrug, much to your amusement.

"What are you doing here?" You speak, more softly, more seriously.

How do I even respond to this question? I was out on a date with another woman but I bumped into our old friend who told me I should find you? Or should I go with I met an old woman and her kid, who I'm pretty sure were cupid's little minions, sent down to earth to give me a rose and to fuck with me?

"I was just in the neighbourhood. I wanted to see if you wanted to um...go out for a coffee?" I lie.

You look at me incredulously, clearly seeing through my bullshit.

"Everything is shut by now." You simply respond.

"Oh...well maybe we can just talk then?"

You tap the metal rails, where you lay your arms. Are you contemplating whether to come down or throw a bucket of water over me? I guess I'll have to wait and see.

Without saying a word, you disappear out of sight. The lights in your apartment switches off.

What does this mean? Are you off to bed?

Before I could ruminate any more, the doors open from behind me and you slip through.

God, you look even better up close.

My hands instinctively reach out to touch you but I withdraw quickly before you could see. You had wrapped yourself in a fleecy blanket, the threads a deep purple.

Without saying a word, you sit down on the step and I can only follow suit, my mind can no longer make decisions for itself it seems.

You smell the same, that same soft floral scent I used to love. The one I used to breathe in when I'd hold you close to me in bed because I didn't want you to leave for work.

Our knees are so close, they almost touch.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

For a minute I don't know how to respond, I just don't want to stop looking at you.

"I was...I was wondering if you were thinking about me?"

You laugh, I laugh too. Of course you weren't.

"I think about you all the time." You tell me so casually, it catches me off guard.

"You do?" I whisper in disbelief.

"It's hard not to when you're on every other billboard in the city."

Oh.

"I think about you all the time too Y/N."

You smile and look up at the sky. The night is aligned with many stars tonight and they all call for your attention but mine. I feel greedy staring at you but I'm simply making up for all the nights that I was alone without you, all those kisses I've shared with women that weren't you.

"What do you think the stars are telling us tonight?" I ask.

You grin and without looking back at me, you say "I think the stars are laughing at us."

"Do you think the stars have changed their mind about us?"

You finally turn to me, your eyes drop. "I don't think that's how it works Pedro."

"If this is the life the stars have planned for me, a life without you, then I don't want it Y/N."

"Pedro-"

"I thought if I made a name for myself, if people knew who I was, then I'd be sure of who I am...but who I'm meant to be, who I want to be...is to be with you." Your eyes meet mine, coloured with emotions you are scared to express. "I look for you everywhere I go Y/N, in every women I meet but you are always a world away."

"We don't even know each other anymore Pedro."

"You are the only one who has always known who I am, even before me Y/N. I'm still as strange and as wild as I have always been. I'm still as messy and as clumsy as I was before. I still love cheap corner store liquor and dancing terribly in public. I still look at chemtrails whenever they past me...because they remind me of you."

"Chemtrails are bad for you, they say they're chemicals."  You tell me, your voice low and expressionless.

"If I die with you as my last thought, it won't be so bad."

I finally find the courage to reach for you and you don't recoil from me, you let me gently run my finger against the hair that falls down past your face. You close your eyes and I selfishly take you, pulling you towards me.

I rest my forehead against yours and I savour this moment where I can be close to you and not let it be a memory.

"What if I've changed?" You whisper.

"Well then I'll spend the rest of my life getting to know you again."

"If I told you to run away with me tonight, would you?" You open your eyes to see me, your expression as serious as ever.

"You're my home Y/N. I'll go wherever you go. Even if it's to another galaxy, we'll drive a little red Corvette into space together and leave this all behind."

You smile and tug on the bottom of your lip. "You think the stars would still allow us to go to space?"

"Fuck the stars." I say as I take your lips.

Oh, how I've missed the sweetness of your taste; in this moment you are spoiling me rotten. You wrap your arms around me and allow the blanket to drop from your shoulders. The only stars that mattered now are those in our eyes. They're telling me the future and it's you. It's always been you.

The sirens of the city and the plane overhead may be loud but I hear nothing over the sound of your heart beat.

You pull away and we both laugh.

In this moment, we are perfect. I am no longer the famous celebrity that belonged to everyone. I am not a son and you are no one's daughter.

We only belong to each other.

I see you shiver and look towards the door.

"Let's go inside." You get up and take my hand, guiding me back to our home. The one I've longed for ever since I left.

The building is quiet, everyone asleep by this hour but old Stan at his desk. I try to shuffle past as inconspicuously as I could, my hand entwine with yours.

"Welcome back Mr Pascal." Stanley greets us as clear as day, his head not even looking up from above his phone.

"Wha- so you do remember me!"

Sly old dog.

Stanley doesn't respond and concentrates on his screen instead.

You shake your head and pull me up the steps but not before I set down my lucky rose on the desk.

"Good night Stan."

I call out before I chase my love up the stairs, both of us ready to write our next chapter together. I don't know what it will entail but I know if you're in it, it will be the greatest adventure I'll ever take.

"Kids these days." Stan sighs, closing the article on his phone and clicking on a familiar app. Putting his feet up, he relaxes with a smile on his face as the Mandalorian theme song begins to play.

[nctseren]

🕒SEREN : 5-7am | NCT 127 24hr RELAY CAM

[warning: i still struggle with english so please be kind:(]

"Hi guys!" Seren is sitting on her bed with her legs crossed, looking directly at the camera.

Her hair is messy and she's wearing a big sweater that surely belongs to one of her members. "It's exactly ..." she shows the time on her cell phone. "5:01 am. There was a little change, as you can see. I was supposed to do my relay cam way earlier but to be honest I just want Doyoung oppa to sleep."

Seren looks around her new room, she recently moved in with Taeyong (she spent more time there anyways than in the room she used to share with her unnie manager), looking for something to do or say, but for a few moments she stares at the wall — she wants to sleep so bad but it's not something she would admit in front of the camera.

"I was planning to have a sleepover with you guys but I fell asleep while planning." She laughs a little. "So guys, I'm going to get a couple of snacks," she gets out of bed and takes the camera carefully. "I think Taeyong oppa hasn't arrived yet. I'll get a chill playlist too, and ... Maybe I'll draw or read something to you. Yeah, maybe."

[...]

"OK, let's do this."

Seren is back on the room, facing the camera. She sits on her bed and takes her favorite stuffed animal —a frog— and hugs him. "This is Dodo. You can imagine who gave it to me, right? Anyways, I'll put on some music."

She picks up her phone and goes into the Spotify app and searches for a song, If I Could Fly by One Direction starts ringing.

"It's one of my favorites," she lays on her bed, picking up a chocolate bar. "There was a time when I thought about doing a cover but they didn't give me an answer." A pout adorns her face.

For the next few minutes Seren stays on the same position, enjoying music and eating chocolates. Every now and then, her eyes close and she has to fight to not fall asleep. It is difficult for her to hide her tiredness, and the chill playlist does not help her, she is sure that the fans will notice.

[...]

"I have recently started re-reading the Harry Potter saga" she lowers the volume on the music, gets out of bed and takes a book from a shelf. "I'm reading The Prisoner of Azkaban, one of my favorites," she reappears on camera, a big smile creeping across her face. "And that's because they introduce the Marauders!"

And then Seren starts reading a few chapters, taking pauses to give her opinion or comment on how incredibly handsome Draco Malfoy looked in the movies. She hopes, truly hopes, that fans will be entertained and can enjoy her Relay Cam.

"Two days ago I think, I was reading to Mark." she says, after finishing reading for a while. "But I didn't expect him to fall asleep, he says I would be good for ASMR. By the way, he's horrible at remembering characters that don't appear in the movies."

She moves closer to the camera. "I really try to make him remember but it's impossible." she straightens her hair a bit, it still looks like she just woke up. "Oh! I think Taeyong oppa just arrived."

Seren jumps out of bed and runs out of the room, completely forgetting the camera. A few moments later, she reappears.

"Tae oppa is here!" she seems happier now. "So I'm going to whisper so he can rest at least for a few minutes."

In the video you can hear Taeyong saying something to her (although it is not understandable) and they both laugh.

"It's time for asmr!" She whispers.

Seren lies on her bed, covering herself with a blanket and bringing the camera to her face, too close. The last minutes of the video are her talking as if she were with a friend, telling about her week, what she did, what she wants to do and telling funny anecdotes.

When she turns to see Taeyong, she can see that he is lying down but he doesn't seem to be asleep. The clock strikes 6:56 am and now she doesn't want to finish, she just wants her leader, her family, to rest.

With a sad sigh she says, "Ok you guys, our time is up. I hope it wasn't boring, but that's all I could do at this time. For now, I think I'll go back to sleep.

Please give all the Relay Cam lots of love! Goodbye!"

———— FEATURING OTHER RELAY CAMS!!

🕒TAEIL : 7-9pm

she only appeared in the beginning of the video

the three of them were in the elevator, waiting

she greeted the camera and said that she had plans with jaehyun and mark

haechan —obviously— complained about it cause:

"hyung!! she's spending more time with them again"

"we'll have a good time without her, anyways"

"oppa!!!"

🕒JAEHYUN : 9-10pm

to be honest, she only watched them play

(because she's not very good at basketball)

so she just sat there laughing and yelling at mark

she swore that she was neither team jaehyun nor team mark

basically she was laughing and enjoying her time with them

"not but i swear i'm good at basket"

"sure, mark"

🕒TAEYONG : 7-9am

when taeyong showed their room, he showed her too

"first, we have sohee, yayy! you already know her, she's the star here"

but after that, only her voice was heard

czennies are very aware that the only reason she was awake was to keep him company

taeyong thanked her for it

(cuties <3)

[thanekrios]

The way fall smells

SUMMARY: Tommy always loved the distinctive scent of fall. After a day patrolling with Joel, he remembers why.

The leaves had grown old and begun falling, laying carpets of warm hues on every trail surrounding Jackson. Tommy took a deep breath, taking in the unique sharpness in the air that came with the last months of the year.

It had been a good day. They had patrolled until noon, everything clear – no signs of Hunters or infected– and after checking in, left for the rest of the day to hunt and walk, to talk and have a snack under the orange light of the late afternoon just like they did when they were young.

Joel was having a good day too; Tommy could see it. For the whole afternoon, his shoulders had been relaxed, arms resting at his sides; every now and then, he stopped to take in the shushing of the leaves or the landscape. He was at peace.

Over the course of two years, Tommy had seen how his brother’s sharp edges had begun to dull and a smile would come to him easier than a frown. He talked more, about Sarah and Tess and sometimes even about himself; he hummed around Tommy, sang around Ellie. For a long time, Joel’s hatred for everything was like an all-consuming fire. But Tommy knew that as catastrophic as fires could be, they could also restore – he had seen it with grasslands, entire fields cleansed by the flames, making way for new vegetation to thrive. And now, he had seen it with Joel.

“We should head back.” Joel said as he got up and brushed breadcrumbs off his jacket. “We don’t want it getting too late.”

“Yeah,” Tommy agreed as they began walking in Jackson’s direction. “Got any plans for tonight?”

“Watchin’ a movie with Ellie.”

‘You’re both welcome to join us for dinner if you like.”

Tommy made a pause and considered his words.

Whenever they had them over, it wasn’t just dinner. It was a series of stories from any period of their lives. The brothers grew more excited with each anecdote, Maria would bid them goodnight long after their plates had been cleared; and as their laughter turned loud like thunderclaps, Ellie began knocking down every miserable object in her proximity as she became overexcited while shouting No fucking way! Then came the guitars. More laughter and clatter. And before they knew it, Maria was walking out the door for an early patrol.

So, Tommy added:

“Before your movie.”

“Thanks, but we don’t wanna interrupt Maria’s sleep two nights in a row.” Joel’s eyes ran across the golden foliage, the corners of his mouth curving.

“Well, I’m sure Ellie would appreciate some leftovers.” Tommy found himself smiling as well. “I can leave’em by the porch.”

“Usual place?”

“Usual place,” he confirmed.

“Appreciate it.”

They walked in silence for a while, enjoying the brittle sound of falling leaves and with each step, they walked into memories.

Tommy loved fall.

He first became enchanted with it as a child. He craved the crunching of a dry leaf under his booted feet, having a hot drink when his lips were chapped, listening to Joel play soft melodies as the sun set fire to the clouds. But above all, he looked forward to the unmistakable scent of summer’s perishing.

Tommy knew he came across as simple, devoid of imagination. Even before the outbreak people had assumed there wasn't much to him, that he never dreamt of anything other than a job in construction, blindly following Joel’s steps. He knew why it was easy to believe he had chosen an uncomplicated life rather than having settled for it. He didn’t make any effort to correct anyone. His dreams had been his own. Truth was, Tommy had wanted to be a storyteller in his youth.

During his childhood, he imagined the playful winds that came with fall were whispering stories, travelling through the rattling orange and yellow leafed trees, there for anyone who was willing to listen. Tommy imagined, to escape the empty rooms, the absent parents. He opened his mind and closed his eyes to craft tales of floating homes in the sky and flying whales and homemade dinners.

Fall shaped each story and realm that sprang in his heart and imagination. He didn’t speak of any of them, for whenever he had attempted to put it into words, the intricacy of each story, the vibrance of every world, the heartbreak experienced by each character became colorless.  

"All imagination and zero talent," he confessed to Joel in his early teens.

Joel, who wasn't the wordy type either, comforted him the only way he knew how: by handing him his treasured guitar.

"You can tell stories with this, too."

By trading words for melodies, Tommy had compromised. If that was to be the only way to set his stories out into the world, it was enough.

Joel stopped and took in a deep breath, catching Tommy’s attention. His older brother let out a pleased sigh:

“I like the way it smells.” He didn’t need to say more, Tommy knew what he meant, but he continued, “Y’know, fall.”

He took in the words and allowed them to travel the usual road, back into his heart. 

“Yeah,” Tommy agreed. He buried his hands deep in his jacket pockets and filled his lungs with fresh air. He had heard that many times before but never from Joel. “Y’know, Sarah used to say the same thing.”

Something softened in Joel’s eyes, the look on his face echoing the one Tommy had seen on him countless times, whenever he had braided Sarah’s hair with so much care and tenderness it made it difficult to think of him as anything other than a loving father.

“Did she now?”

Tommy nodded:

“She said she liked the way fall smelled and then, uh, asked me what the smell was.”

“What did ya say?”

“I dunno, somethin’ dumb, like dust from a dirt road or somethin’.”

“That…that’s pretty accurate. Why’d you say it’s dumb? Was Sarah disappointed or somethin’?” Joel asked after a moment.

Tommy quirked a brow:

“Sarah? Our Sarah? That girl didn’t act disappointed a day in her life.”

“Yeah” Joel agreed in a whisper.

“But she asked me again the year after that. And then the one after that. And it kinda became a game we played. I gave her the thickest answers and she took’em. Then she started havin’ answers of her own.”

“Oh, yeah? What’d she say?”

“Well, a bunch of stuff. Good stuff. I think one time she said, uh, sharpened pencil. Yeah, that was it. Sharpened pencil. She also came up with…”

In recent years, Tommy had become an active forgetter, a problem that had triggered countless arguments with Maria. But those moments with Sarah, he remembered better than entire years.

“Apples, yeah. Refreshin’ and sweet and sour. There was, uh, wet soil after rain and hot hay dryin’ in the sun.”

“That’s…that’s a good one” Joel chuckled before kneeling to tie his shoelace. Tommy was certain his brother was only pretending to do it to shield his face. Then, as he stood up, he held his gaze. His smile was wide, eyes gleaming. “What else?”

Tommy didn’t have to think too hard. He knew just the one.

It had been a late afternoon, two days before the outbreak. Orange tinted the town as if the moment already belonged to a memory. Sarah had a plan; she would go to Tannhaus Watches & Jewellery to get Joel’s birthday present and he would go to the bakery next to it and place an order for a cake.

“Divide and conquer!” Sarah had repeated on their way to town.

The breeze carried the earthy sweet scent of the piles of leaves, tickling his nose. For once, he had decided, he would ask the question first:

“What does fall smell like?”

It had taken her but a few seconds to whip up an answer, taking Tommy by surprise:

“Fall smells like you, Uncle Tommy.”

Tommy’s words had died in his throat. He looked down, speechless still, and rested his eyes on her smile, equal parts sweet and smug. The realization of never having felt more loved dawned on him—it was a similar sensation to floating downstream. He felt weightless.  Tommy remembered how when Sarah was little, they spent most of their time lying on golden grass, looking for shapes in the clouds or loudly singing along in his car. Sometimes they sat on the porch and drank extra sweet hot cocoa and he told her – in his own convoluted way – the stories he had told himself as a child to feel less alone. Tommy had reminded her, through his stories and his terrible mac and cheese dinners, that he would always be there for her – just like Joel had been for him.

“Alright. You win, sweetheart,” he said when he meant to say Thank you, I love you too.

Sarah had wrapped her skinny arms around his waist. She would never do that again.

They made their way down the street, their sneakers brushing against the asphalt, the musky fragrance of wisterias faint in the air.

“I wasn’t tryin’ to win but I’m glad I did.” And she had meant I love you more.

Jackson peered through the trees, lights dotted across the county. The temperature had dropped, the chill bit at Tommy’s ears, pink shading his cheeks. A big lump had formed in his throat — there was no way he would be able to speak without his voice breaking. It didn’t matter, he wanted to share it with Joel. The words poured out of his lips as tears ran down his cheeks. He stopped. He half laughed; half cried. Then explained, in vivid detail, how Sarah had made him feel. He apologized. Hell, he didn’t even know what he was apologizing for. Talking about Sarah? Crying? He had grown so used to getting burned whenever he had brought her up, it was still easy to forget just how much Joel had changed.

After Sarah’s death, for the first part of the nightmarish years they spent together, barely scraping by, surviving at the cost of their own humanity, he dreamt of her almost every night. Waking up in sobs, the light dissolving into grey shadows. Joel had refused to look at him, splintering Tommy’s heart. They never spoke of the past. They never spoke of her. They took. They survived. And their hollowness deepened with every wretched day.

Time moved forward; the changing of the seasons serving as the last remaining proof of it. He found comfort in the breeze that came as the year was about to end, revisiting memories and his old stories. Sometimes, as he patrolled, he ventured back into his worlds and again greeted the heroes of his childhood. He knew that there was no room for dreams or stories and his heart ached as he gave them up all over again. And then, he watched how the seams of Joel’s humanity continued ripping one after the other. He had believed he would never get his brother back. But now, Joel’s eyes glistened, a combination of longing and joy. He told him there wasn’t a thing to be sorry for. He listened and placed a hand on his little brother’s shoulder.

“Thank you,” Joel said softly once Tommy hung his head and fell quiet.

Tommy nodded, letting out a trembling vaporous exhalation.  

“I’ve always wanted to tell you about that,” Tommy said as the knot in his throat loosened and he looked back up at Joel “I just didn’t know how.”

“I’m glad you finally did.” Joel gave Tommy’s shoulder a little squeeze before letting go.

Tommy watched him walk ahead, his silhouette against the sinking sun. He couldn’t see it, but he knew Joel was smiling. He was smiling too. The wind blew. It smelled like fall. It smelled like home. 

[vanessakirbyfans]

Vanessa Kirby suggests we meet on the Mall, the central location for her on-screen triumph as the young Princess Margaret in The Crown. I’m standing outside the shuttered Institute of Contemporary Arts when she strides into view, a slender, leggy figure with bleached hair and brilliant blue eyes, clad in trademark black, but for her gleaming white Converse trainers.

"I haven’t been here since we were filming!" she marvels through her mask, gazing up the processional avenue towards Buckingham Palace. "I was whizzing up the road on a motorbike, holding onto the back of Matthew Goode [as Antony Armstrong-Jones] and feeling so exhilarated about what on Earth was happening to my life – being in a job I loved, playing someone I loved."

Her ebullient mood was dented when Margaret’s handbag, into which she’d put her own phone, was blown away from between her feet, and an opportunistic passer-by ran off with it. "By the time I could check Find My iPhone, it was already in Leicester Square," she says. "Of course, the costume department were furious because the bag was vintage and a one-off." We both laugh, rather ruefully, for such anecdotes already seem to belong to a more carefree time. This bright, crisp lunchtime in lockdown, the Mall is all but deserted –there would be no need for roadblocks or filming at dawn today – while the roles Kirby is here to discuss are light-years away from her embodiment of a pampered royal party girl.

The morning of our meeting, Pieces of a Woman has launched on Netflix to rapturous reviews and critical acclaim that has seen Kirby, in her first lead role, picked as a front-runner for the award season’s most coveted best-actress gongs.

It is not, however, an easy watch. Kirby plays Martha, a first-time mother whose baby dies moments after being born; the film follows Martha’s subsequent disintegration, alongside that of her close relationships. Her labour, which comes at the start of the film, is some 26 minutes of one unbroken take that manages to be simultaneously intimate and menacing as the camera swoops around the apartment and hovers beside the traumatised protagonists.

Kirby’s performance is astonishingly unselfconscious, which is the more surprising since she never went to drama school (turning down the offer of a place at Lamda in favour of stage roles at Bolton’s Octagon Theatre) and says she couldn't bring herself to dance in front of her friends. "I’m the one who sits in the corner and watches." She describes seeing herself on-screen as "disconcerting", and "not a very natural human experience", and indeed even finds making Zoom calls a trial. "There’s nothing to hide behind!"

For Pieces of a Woman, the director Kornel Mundruczo decided that the birth scene would be the first to be shot, she tells me, as we stroll around St James’s Park, conducting ourselves like a couple of spies in a Le Carré novel. "I knew I’d have to be naked, and literally open my legs and give birth in front of a group of strangers I’d only met that morning. I was actually quite thankful – I thought, the rest of it’s going to be a lot easier."

In fact, she says, she found herself swept away by the emotion of the story. "Normally, it’s so hard to forget there are machines in your face, but I had no idea that a camera was even there." Was it traumatic to act? "The first time we shot it, I was literally sobbing for 10 minutes afterwards. I couldn’t get out of it. My brain was telling me it wasn’t real, but my unconscious didn’t know the difference, especially with having a real baby in my arms.

"Kornel came over onto the bed and held me so tight. He didn’t let go of me for five minutes, and he said, 'Just remember this feeling.' That really helped me for the rest of the movie, when the character doesn’t express anything, but almost has to be doing the howling without speaking a word."

Kirby took her research seriously, even asking a mother-to-be –a total stranger – to allow her to be present in the delivery room at the birth of her son in a north-London hospital. "I remember every single second of it," the actress says emphatically. "I was there, glued to my seat, for seven hours, not even a loo break! I was just amazed, in awe. I saw a woman completely surrender and go on this spiritual journey, which involved indescribable pain, clearly, but also ecstasy. It gave me a whole new respect for women and how powerful they are, and a new empathy for men, because they feel so helpless. And obviously, seeing the baby come out was the most incredible thing in the world I’ve ever seen, by far. After he was born, all of the mother’s colour returned, she looked like an angel, she had a kind of holy glow." Bathetically, it was only then that the couple recognised Kirby. "They were going, 'Oh my God, it’s Princess Margaret! This is so weird!'"

The experience has given her a new philosophy on life, she says. "I was watching the mother go through these contractions, which were excruciating, and the pushing, and then there was a moment of calm, and of expansion. And so, when I’m going through things in my life, I say to myself, this is like a contraction, surrender to it, because there might be something born from it. Sometimes we don’t want that; when we’re feeling something horrible, we want it to pass as far as possible. I’m teaching myself to allow it to be there and not resist or push it away, and that’s because of that woman."

But her character’s storyline also demanded that Kirby understand the experience of stillbirth. A friend introduced her to a woman who had lost her baby Luciana under eerily similar circumstances to those in Martha’s narrative. "She shared everything with me." They have become close friends, and the film’s ending is dedicated to Luciana. Kirby continues to work with Sands, the Stillbirth and Neonatal Death charity, and is voluble in her admiration of the Duchess of Sussex and Chrissy Teigen, both of whom have recently spoken out about their own experiences of miscarriage.

"I feel so close to them and so proud of them for breaking that silence," she says. "Meghan is probably the last person who would feel comfortable sharing her very personal, intimate feelings. It’s that courage that I want to continue to honour. What they’re saying is, if you’ve been through it, we have too, we share your story. I think that makes you feel less lonely. But one in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage, which is far more than I knew about. Society finds it difficult to hold space for that kind of pain."

Her parents, to whom she is very close, have both seen the film and wept throughout, she says. As if on cue, her phone pings, and her eyes soften when she checks the message; it’s a childhood friend who herself miscarried, getting in touch to say how much the film has meant to her.

The integrity of Kirby’s performance has already netted her the Volpi Cup for Best Actress at the Venice Film Festival. "It doesn’t seem real," she says. "I have it in its case – I wouldn’t have it on display, it looks like a football trophy – but occasionally I glance at it and think, 'Did that really happen? Or did I make it up in a weird dream?'" In a similar vein, she is reluctant to engage with the Oscar buzz surrounding her. "I don’t even know when they are," she admits. "My 13-year-old self would have a heart attack. It’s ridiculous, isn’t it!"

Kirby’s other film, The World to Come, is set in mid-19th-century America but touches on the same themes of bereavement and redemption. The central character Abigail, played by Katherine Waterston, has also lost her young daughter, and in her grief, turns away from her husband to have an affair with Tallie, her free-spirited, flame-haired neighbour. "I was glad I was playing Tallie rather than Abigail, because it might have been a bit too much," Kirby confesses – though without giving away spoilers, that role is pretty traumatic too...

The screenplay is taken from the short story of the same name by Jim Shepard, which was inspired by an entry he found in an antique diary: 'My best friend’s moved away, and I don’t know if I’ll ever see her again.' "It was one woman’s voice, like an echo from the past, and we’ll never know who she was," says Kirby. "The World to Come really educated me about what life was like for women not that long ago. They didn’t have a choice about anything they did with their time. You were owned by the house, and the man, and you had no freedom outside that. The best thing about doing this mad job sometimes is having your ignorance illuminated. I gravitate towards things that push beyond my experience, I want to go to places I don’t know, I’m not familiar with."

The experience of making both films has changed her profoundly. "I can’t do anything unless it means something to me now," she says. "It’s a better way to work, because you’re not focused on yourself at all. So maybe I’ll only work once every 10 years!"

To ensure that this is not the case, and in order to find more untold, female-led stories, her ambition is now to set up her own production company. "Even a few years ago, a film about a woman losing a baby would have been unthinkable. There are so many voiceless people, and I have a voice in this industry, and I want to make sure the tribe is represented properly."

It is undeniably awkward, therefore, that her male co-stars in the films, Shia LaBeouf and Casey Affleck, both of whom play violent, abusive husbands, have been called out for their treatment of women. In December, the British singer FKA Twigs filed a lawsuit against LaBeouf, her ex-partner, alleging that he "hurts women. He uses them. He abuses them, both physically and mentally". While LaBeouf largely denied the accusations, he admitted in a statement to The New York Times: "I have a history of hurting the people closest to me. I’m ashamed of that history and am sorry to those I hurt. There is nothing else I can really say."

Meanwhile, Affleck was sued by two female crew members working on his 2010 film I’m Still Here, one of whom accused him of sexual harassment. He denied the allegations, and the lawsuits were settled out of court, but he later told the Associated Press: "I behaved in a way, and I allowed others to behave in a way, that was really unprofessional, and I’m sorry."

Kirby is understandably reluctant to get into any of this. "I can’t comment on a legal case that’s going on in someone’s personal life," she says. "I feel really protective of Pieces, so that’s what I want to speak about. Because it came out at eight this morning, all I can think about is the mothers I spoke to, and wanting them to be my focus. I just know my job is to honour them."

Perhaps counter-intuitively, starring in Pieces has awakened in her the desire for a family of her own. "It’s definitely made me want a baby, for sure," she says; but she hasn’t currently got a partner, having split up from Callum Turner (Frank Churchill in last year’s Emma), whom she met when they co-starred in the 2014 film Queen & Country. "This year has made me think a lot about the home I want to create. I like the idea of inviting someone into a space that’s mine, preferably before I have kids."

In the near future, however, Kirby has nothing on her plate except for getting through a third lockdown. "I’m free as a bird! I’ve read a lot of stuff, and said no to a lot of stuff..." She currently shares a flat in Tooting, south London, with her sister Juliet, an assistant director, and two friends. "I was just about to move out to live on my own in north London – my God, I would have been so lonely! My sister saved me. It was so nice to have routines together. We were trying to take a bit of exercise, cooking together, watching films that made us feel better, drinking wine on Friday nights..."

By now, having circled St James’s Park several times, we are strolling back towards the Corinthia Hotel, where Kirby has a full programme of Zoom interviews lined up for the afternoon. "That’s why I’m so happy to have actually had the chance to go out and meet you in real life," she says enthusiastically. "It’s funny when everything in your life closes down, and you have to sit with yourself, and you suddenly notice all the things you have and you’re grateful for. I hope that feeling never goes away – I will never underestimate how lucky I am."

[chayacat]

Devil’s Sweet Star (28)

Fandom: Dead by Daylight

Ghostface x Female Reader  

Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  

***

Do you have a favorite season? I love spring and winter. Ah spring... the most beautiful season, where flowers bloom just like love stories. Cherry blossoms... the petals that fall... a romantic movie scene, isn't it? And winter! a cold a little dry certainly ... but that is where we see the thing that amazes children. I'm not talking about Santa Claus, no. I'm talking about... Snow. There's so much you can do with snow! Snowmen, snow angels, snowball fights etc...

The falling snow brings magic to the scenery, the frozen lakes offer an incredible spectacle that allows you to play and fish... if we're careful not to break it. Because I don't know if you've ever tried swimming in a lake where the temperature is... icy, but if you want to fall into hypothermia, this is a good way to get there. but it's a good place to ice skate. If you are good enough then you will have no problem! but if you start then... you'll often hurt. Generally, what inspires you to ice skating are figure skating competitions. Unfortunately, at the moment, it is not winter. So, no ice skating. Or... You have to go to an ice rink. And that's exactly what Melina had planned to relax everyone. Especially Danny.

What put him in a bad mood? The fact that you went out with Melina last night? No no... You have the right to have fun with your friends from time to time. And he sincerely hopes you had a good time! After all, if you ever come to leave Roseville, with him, if possible, you may not be out again for a little while. No, what put our dear Danny in a bad mood is this asshole who tried to charm you at the restaurant. This wretched little bastard had the audacity to come to you, to talk to you, and in addition to touching you? And the whole thing, like he honestly thought it was going to work?

And the worst part of all this was you and Melina made it clear to him that you were already with someone. But that bastard didn't want to know. Danny finds his next victim. Thanks to you, he knows what he looks like, and when he comes into action, Danny won't miss him. No spectacular staging. A hard-line massacre. A Ghostface classic. No one has the right to touch you, even less seduce you. He doesn't know what he just got himself into. Want a good way to know when Danny's angry? Look at his eyes. They are a piercing blue as normal, well when he is angry or when he goes crazy, they are even more piercing. Like the eyes of a cat.

“Jed? Are you...Are you sure you’re alright?”  

Danny came out of his macabre dreams to watch you. Your voice, like a sweet melody to his ears, will give him a smile, his beautiful angel smile.

“Yes, excuse me. I was thinking of something else. Were you talking to me?” He asks, putting his glasses back on his nose.  

“No, I was the one talking to you. I told you not to worry about that asshole last night. We said to him to go f*ck himself, (y/n) and me. And believe me, he was doing one of those faces... he won't forget me.” respond Melina, looking in the rear-view mirror.

“I'm surprised you didn't give him an arm wrench. Or a kick where I think... I'm really surprised!” said Mattew to her with a sneaky smile.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Like what, you see that I can perfectly behave as a responsible person and act with tact and diplomacy ... before moving on to the offend. But believe me, it's not the desire that I missed. I didn't want to get banned from this restaurant anyway, it would piss me off.”

“Anyway, Melina's right. You don't have to worry about that jerk, Jeddy. It does not reach your ankle I reassure you! You're a lot sexier!” replied Mattew with a wink.

“You know if Chris finds out you said that, he's going to be jealous? but... Thank you Mattew. You're right, I don't have to get in my head for bullshit like that. But is it really necessary to go ice skating? we still have work to do you know...” said Danny. He was not going to take his head for very long, since he intends to kill him. And just that image made him shudder. He was looking forward to it.

“It's going to be good for everyone! and then we'll have fun! Don't be shy! This is not the first time we have done so. Especially you Jed.” respond Melina.  

Indeed, this is not the first time that Danny went ice skating. The Zanesville ice rink is quite large and there are not many people at this time. It's perfect, you're going to have the whole ice rink just for you... for at least two hours. Melina parked in front of the rink entrance and indeed, seen up close she was big. very big.

“How long has it been? Two years? it has not changed in any case .... I wonder if the boss still remembers the falls he took here.” says Mattew before entering, following by the others.  

“Don't worry, I think if you tell him, his lumbar will remember it. And his ass too.” respond Danny who makes you laugh.

Each one your turn, you rent ice skates. And one thing that made Danny laugh was that if he wears 40, you only wear 36. How cute, you have such small feet, in a sense it fits perfectly with your body and size. Everything is small in you. It's cute and it's funny, especially when you react to it. So small, so fragile... And yet a hell of a temper!

The ice rink was practically empty at that time, there was only a couple and two teenagers who visibly didn't have class today. Melina entered the ice first once everyone was ready, and if the start was a little difficult, she quickly took the hand. This was not the case for Mattew, who kept clinging to her every time he was about to fall.

“Have you ever done one? Or would you rather I give you a few classes? It looks like I'm a very good teacher...” said Danny to you with a wink.  

“Really funny Mr Olsen, but before you teach me, I'd like to see if you can last more than ten seconds without finishing your ass on the ice.” you respond with a little laugh.  

“Ok...as you wish miss.” Danny replied with a smile, entering the rink, getting on the ice with a disconcerting ease. “So? Convinced? I am still waiting for an answer to my question.”

“Convinced. and... No. I have never had the opportunity to do it before. So I would need a couple of lessons.” you answer.  

“Ok, first...give me your hand. Trust me, I will not let you go. Promise. I know what it's like to fall your ass first on ice and believe me, it's not pleasant at all.”

Hesitating as you step on to enter the rink, Danny gently taking your hand to bring you back to him. Well, he had to quickly catch up with you in his arms because you were slipping. If the beginning was quite complicated, because Danny had to prevent you from falling several times, after several minutes, you start to take your marks. Little by little Danny let you go and gave you more space. And once he feels you're ready, he let you go completely but stood by you just in case.

“You see! it's not that hard in the end! You're doing very well!” He said with a smile.

“I confirm, you're an excellent teacher! Thank you so much Jed!” you respond, kissing him as he kisses you back.  

Danny left you for a few moments with Melina and Mattew to skate a little on his side. The agility he had, allowed him to move perfectly on the ice. If he wanted to, he could become a skating champion, but he knows the ruthless world of the sport. All shots are allowed. And he cared a little too much about his legs to lose them in an unfortunate "accident". And then be a sportsman and a killer... don't really go together. Fame is a good thing, the problem is that when you are also a murderer, your private life... is no longer as private. Generally, there is always a clever little journalist who hangs around... And as if by chance always at the right time. At least as a journalist, Danny is quiet in his private life.

During these two hours of tranquillity, the whole small group had fun, laughing every time Mattew fell. And when he fell, Danny was always the first to go to him and pick him up. While you and Melina laughed and chatted on your side. Then the crowd began to arrive. It was time to leave because when it has too many people, it's almost impossible to skate without falling, even when we're as good as our dear assassin. So, you leave the rink, return the skates and get out of the building to get back in the car.

“So, this ice christening? it went well to what I see!” Said Melina cheerfully.  

“Speak for yourself! I didn't stop falling to the ground or catching up on the railing!” respond Mattew, a little grumpy.  

“ haaawn poor little Mattew! You'll ask Chris to give you a little massage.... If you know what I mean.”  

“... the worst part is that I know very well that it will end like this, if I ask him for a massage. If I provoke Chris once... he can quickly become wild.”

“You're not going to complain about it... it's better to be like that than not. At least he is more tactile than before. If I remember correctly, he didn't even dare hold your hand for fear of breaking it.” Replied Danny with a little smile.  

“It's true... I'll always remember, he was really too cute.” answer Mattew.  

Melina started the car and drove off towards Roseville. The return trip was more enjoyable. Danny felt a little more relaxed. But he didn't forget the other asshole. And he intends to make him regret his actions in a way... irreversible. A good old-time murder will bring back memories. Like when he slaughtered that bastard Doctor who let Carla die. He hadn't missed him that day... or rather that night. That's where his career in murder began. Because of an asshole.

But the past is the past as they say! It is better to move forward. Melina offered a fast food for lunch, all while landing at the park to enjoy the fresh air before the hot days that will arrive. The whole small group moved the rest of the day to the park, chatting and telling old family anecdotes. Except Danny, of course. He had made a cross on his past with his "parents", it was not to talk about it now. He was free of it now. As the last light of day disappeared to make way for the night sky, Melina took Danny and you back to your building.  

She greeted you both with a wink not to go crazy, to which Danny answered calmly but with a smile not to worry about it. Then both enter the building laughing when they see Mattew's reaction. As you both arrived at your apartment, a noise was heard from inside. After a brief exchange of gaze, Danny took the keys to your apartment from your hands and opened the door cautiously. Lighting the light of the living room, he did not notice anything strange, for the moment.

“We must have been dreaming... Or maybe it came from your home?” you said looking at Danny.

“No. I checked three times before I left. It's all closed. The noise comes from here.” responds Danny before hearing another noise from the kitchen.  

Danny walked quietly to the kitchen, taking something to defend himself. If there’s a thief and he's armed, he's going to spend a bad time too. Arriving in the room, he suddenly turned on the light and raised his arm ready to strike before stopping cleanly in front of the source of all the noise. And this thing emits a very different sound this time.... a meow to be more precise.

“I think we have a little thief in your kitchen.” he said, laying the object he was holding before taking the frightened kitten in his arms.

“Haaawn, poor little guy... How did you get home?” you answer looking at the kitten.  

“Hum... It's a girl. And given the room I would say she came through your window. And visibly she enjoys your cakes. You've got two that's gone.”

“Oh... I had left the window open to let them cool and to prevent the apartment from smelling like bananas... But hey the main thing is that you ate well. You don't look like you have a necklace... I think I'm going to keep you!” you replied caressing the kitten who began to purr.

“You're going to have to plan on feeding her and a basket to sleep in... as well as a litter box, a cat tree... I think there's a pet store in Zanesville that owns it all for a cheap. And then she's going to need a name." responds Danny giving you the kitten.

“I'll see all that tomorrow. With a rested head. In the meantime, I'm going to set up a little corner for you in front of my bed. That way you won't be alone. It's convenient to keep old plaids. They're going to be able to re-serve again.”  

“In that case, I'm going to let you take care of that kitten. I still have a lot of work to do. Maybe tomorrow we'll see each other? If the boss doesn't make us run in the direction.”

You nod before kissing Danny, who kisses you back. Then he left your apartment to go back to his, locking the door. He sighed; it feels good to be at home. Not that he didn't enjoy the day, but since he knew about this guy at the restaurant, he had only one desire: to find him and massacre him. He went to his office to pick up his things. He took the opportunity to look at his hunting board. You can count yourself happy, Hoggins, to have gained extra life time because of the incompetence of the Roseville police officers... For once, and even if it hurt him to admit it, he felt sorry for Inspector Wilhelm. It's not easy to stay calm when you're the only 'smart' person in the whole police station.

He took his bag, and walked out of the building without making any noise. He got in his van and hit the road to the restaurant where you were last night. He parked a little further so as not to be noticed. When that bastard quits his job, Danny will follow him quietly home. It will do as usual, observe, note, analyse. And he'll do it again and again. Until the day it's time for him to meet Ghostface. And that night...

The massacre will begin.

Let’s the countdown begin.  

***

(My little finger says to me that you are 52 people whose following me! From the deepest part of my potato heart, I wanna say thank you to all of you! I never imagine to get so far and please so many people! I hope you will continue to be as numerous or even more numerous!  I hope you’ll like this chapter like the others ones! Well, it's time for my brain to rest! Have a great weekend to you all! See ya!)

[theexecutionerssong]

SKAM FRANCE BTS MASTERPOST

This is a master post of BTS anecdotes told in interviews, at cons, screenings and on social media. Don’t click the read more if you don’t want to lose some of the magic. I know sometimes knowing too much of how a show was shot can ruin it. Also, it’s very obvious that there was more promo starting around season 3 than for the first two seasons, don’t hold it against me. Feel free to message me if you think of something else as I must have forgotten a ton of things.

CASTING, REHEARSALS, BTS IN GENERAL

Skam France had the rights for the 4 seasons first but had to follow the original script almost to a T for the first 2 and if the audience was big enough then they would be allowed to distance themselves from OG

Skam France casted actors that were as close personality wise to their characters as possible, which made it easier for the cast to identify with their characters and made the friendships developping between the characters more believable since it was also developping off screen

They were not allowed to cast underaged actors who would have been closer to the real age of the characters due to the long hours of the shooting conditions

Most of the actors come from theatre and many had no or little previous experience with shooting for a camera before

The cast isn’t allowed to watch the clips before they air.

Most of the clothes they wear in the show are their own.

During rehearsals of the first seasons, Philippine went to the board with everyone’s names on it and wrote something funny next to Zoe’s name and wanted to send it to her but she messed up and published it on her ig stories, leaking the entire cast when it was still supposed to be a secret.

Lula’s first reaction when she got the script and “met” Daphné was “oh no I’m scared. I just want to slap her, she’s insufferable”

Assa almost didn’t audition for two reasons: the casting call didn’t specify they were looking for a woman of color and French casting calls almost always say whether they are specifically looking for a black woman. If it says nothing then they are usually looking for a white person. She thought she had no chance because of that. Second reason, after accepting the casting call, she did some research and found out OG Sana was from the Maghreb and she’s not. But her agent convinced her to go through with it, the only thing the skam france team wouldn’t negotiate was that they wanted a Muslim actress. There was no way they would have casted a non muslim actress/actor for Imane and Sofiane.

Skam France was the first TV show on French TV to have a black muslim  woman wearing a hijab as a main character

Paul, Robin and Axel knew each other before shooting, they’d met in Avignon.

Coline was still in her last year of high school when she shot the first two seasons.

Niels is the one who came up with a raccoon as Eliott’s spirit animal

They shoot about 15 minutes of usable content per day which is impressive (it’s usually 2-3 for movies released in theatres, 5-7 for TV programs)

When France TV told David the first two seasons were a success and they were renewing the show, he gave them a list of things he wanted to change so that he’d agree to come back to direct the next seasons, including a different camera, renewing the writers team (they included Niels), storylines, the ig content, etc. The new camera they got was a SONY Venice which allows them to play a lot with the focus/blur ratio and the cold and warm undertones, which made a major shift in the visual quality of seasons 3 and 4 compared to the previous 2.

David named Eliott after his son.

Having the teaser from Eliott’s POV was David’s idea. It’s the first remake to have a clip from the French Even’s POV

The bus stop from season 3 is fake, it doesn’t exist. It wasn’t even shot in Paris itself but in Saint Ouen.

Maxence didn’t watch OG - besides the towels in the bathroom clip - because he wanted to create his own Eliott without being too influenced, and he didn’t watch s1 and 2 of skam france either because he wanted Eliott to discover the characters without knowing their backgrounds.

Maxence wasn’t supposed to audition. He wanted to be done with his acting school before shooting anything but the head of the casting team came to watch a public class at his school and asked him to audition for Eliott at the end. David and Niels knew right away he was the one. Niels watched the audition tapes and was very impressed with another actor but within the first 3 seconds of watching Maxence, he knew it wouldn’t be anyone else. Maxence met Axel after the 3rd call back and they clicked right away. He’d broken his foot two days earlier so he was in crutches. They watched Even’s manic episode and had to improvise a similar scene but had to do with the crutches. They also went for a drink before shooting and they talked for hours, their connection was instantaneous. 

When he learned Maxence was cast, Axel went on his instagram and saw the model pictures and thought he was way too hot with the abs and everything and he himself would look like a potato during the nude scenes next to him. So he got a coach and for 3 months he trained and got on a very strict diet. He was disappointed that there were no shots where you could actually see his abs properly in Skam. He had also said months before that he had gotten a coach because before they started shooting seasons 3 and 4, he had met up with Marilyn to get advice on how to carry a season and she had told him to get a coach otherwise he wouldn’t be able to keep up with the pace. So what is the truth?

It leaked that Maxence was casted in July 2018 because someone on a Korean website recognized his shoes in an IG story from when he’d been spotted at the airport months earlier but it was kept mostly under wraps. Then his and Lais’s names leaked too a couple of months later but most people hadn’t seen his face before the trailer.

David asked Axel and Maxence to give up their phones and social media during the couple of months they were shooting to be really focused and not get distracted by the outside world and they mostly did. Axel bought an mp3 to still have music, he wrote “LUCAS ♥” on it with a white out pen. He created a playlist for Lucas, including songs like Run Boy Run and I love you by Woodkid, and To Build a Home by the Cinematic Orchestra.

Maxence’s process to get ready for a shot: he does yoga and dances a lot in the morning. he puts music on and paces a room while picturing himself standing on the edge of a cliff and if at some point he feels like falling and loses his balance, it means he’s got it. He asks that all the scripts he gets be printed on the right side of the page and on the left he takes notes about what the character is feeling through 7 different states: love, hate, fear, power, vulnerability, sex and i hate myself for not remembering the last one. To play a scene properly, you have to conjure up 4 states to create one emotion. He loves that David respects his method and is able to adapt to every member of the cast’s method. He also uses his body as a tool, for example if his character has to feel lonely or unsure, he will curl up into a ball for an hour without moving and then he’ll be in the right mindset because his body is telling him he’s isolated. That’s the method he used for Eliott, he created “lost scenes” that weren’t in the script, moments in between scenes with Lucas, to get more into Eliott’s mindset.

Maxence wrote a letter to Eliott, drew a picture of him, and spent hours adding notes to the script about his personality before even trying to get into his mind. 

There was a contest for the drawings in season 3. Maxence participated but didn’t get picked. Jeanne Lelièvre did!

All the social media content for seasons 3 and 4 were shot on the same day in December 2018 which is why you can see heavy winter clothing even when the content was published in May. For season 3, most ideas were Axel’s, and Maxence said no to 90%. 

While shooting for seasons 3 and 4, Axel was also on stage every night for theatre

To prepare for his role in s3, Axel watched CMBYN, Moonlight, and The Office 

They received more feedbacks from international fans than French ones at first. It was even a private joke between Niels and David, there were no comments in French on Youtube. Then the piano clip happened and David’s phone went crazy with notifications. He was in the editing room with Jérémy and the buzzing from his phone was non stop. They banned phones in the editing room after that.

Skam France owes part of its popularity to how accessible the cast and crew are, either on social media or IRL, with 6 entirely free events organized to get the fans and the cast and crew to meet, watch episodes together and have Q&As during seasons 3 and 4.

Skam France shooting locations have become extremely popular for the fans to hang out at and leave little mementos, to the point that the mayor of Paris has asked the team to pick completely untraceable locations, or make sure they are not in Paris itself for the next seasons

Skam France was the first remake to get renewed for 2 (possibly 4?) original seasons

Alexia and Daphné were supposed to have their own seasons they but couldn’t get the green light from Norway. He got the idea for Arthur’s story quite quickly after but they had to rework the scripts for seasons 5 and 6 a lot. Robin talked to David about his addiction to video games and how it could be a potential theme but in the end David chose deafness instead.

SEASONS 1 AND 2

It was Coline’s idea to make Alexia bi. There was a scene when Alexia mentions an ex boyfriend and she asked David “why wouldn’t it be a girl?” and his only reaction was “Ok. What’s her name?” and that’s how bi!Alexia was born.

It was also Coline’s idea to give Alexia’s colorful hair. She later regretted it because she had to bleach her hair twice to get the blue to stay and it fried her hair.

Assa’s worst memory of shooting s1 and 2 is when the girls have to carry Daphné, she kept dropping her and was afraid of hurting her.

Marilyn and Lula ruined the scene when the girls are having breakfast all together when they are on the countryside because they couldn’t stop laughing over carrots and the crunchy noise it was making. It was the last day of shooting and their nerves were all over the place.

SEASON 3

The first scene in the common room didn’t hit them that much, they didn’t realize the impact it would have because the whole shooting was just David yelling at them to look at each other then stop then do it again then stop etc

Nobody realized how big of an impact the “Moi c’est Eliott” line would have and then when they watched the clip, it was obvious.

The check de gang wasn’t scripted, it was Paul’s idea to make it a running gag. David wasn’t sure about it but after doing it just once, he was sold. Basile tripping over the bench was also Paul’s idea but he didn’t warn anyone he was doing it so Xavier started laughing and the camera was shaking so bad that they couldn’t keep it and had to reshoot the scene. They noticed during the editing process that Robin also tripped at the same time in the background during one take so they had to keep that one. 

Lucas playing the piano was Axel’s idea even though he didn’t know how to play properly. He sent a text to David at the end of June with different ideas for songs and David picked the most difficult one. He then practiced anytime he could until they shot the scene in october. It took him two months to learn it completely and then a little more to make it look easy.  (Niels later said it was his idea and that Axel was a cheeky little shit). Maxence had never heard Axel play the song before that moment so Eliott’s reaction is genuine. He didn’t think he’d manage to get in the right state of mind because the apartment was too small for the whole team and they were all very cranky, it was 3 am, but the moment he heard the first notes, he forgot all about it and was completely amazed.

The infiltration party: David asked that Basile pushes Daphné a bit, like shoves her out of the way when they have to run, but they hadn’t had the time to rehearse anything. After a couple of takes, Paul pushed Lula a bit too hard and she fell on her knees quite hard. He felt so bad because he never wanted to hurt her and they all had to take a half an hour break because her knees hurt. David after that was like OKAY NO MORE STUNTS EVER.

Axel got mad at the makeup department because the two lines on his face were not on the same place when they shot the outside scene and then once inside. He got so angry he could have cried that they wouldn’t believe him. So during the shooting he looked straight at the camera and wiped them away with the back of his hand to force them to draw the lines properly.

The first kiss scene: they had been shooting for 12 hours. It was raining intermittently all day so the team had to pack up the cameras often and wait it out when it was too much. They ran 4 hours late. They had a fake rain machine but no change of clothes so they could only shoot once. Below the bridge is not easily accessible, it’s a long path from the gate, so they used ropes to get things up and down from the bridge. They only had one shot. They had already shot kissing scenes but David was always telling them it had to be more passionate and kept yelling at them to use more tongue so for that shot they gave it their everything on the first (and only) take they did. 5 minutes later they were shooting the Remember scene.

They shot all the scenes in the colloc on the first week of shooting. Minute by minute was shot right before Samedi 9h17. They had to restart shooting samedi 9h17 four times because something wasn’t working between Axel and Maxence, they were clumsy and stressed. After taking 5 minutes to themselves with David to remind themselves of how pivotal the scene was, Axel and Maxence said they were ready and they shot the opening scene that made the cut.

The Phase de latence clip : Axel and Maxence felt like terrible actors because they had already shot all the big very emotional scenes and this was a bit tamer since Eliott doesn’t show much emotions. They felt that way about all the scenes shot in the school.

The Fête de trop clip: They shot the fight with the guys 8 times but it wasn’t enough for David until Robin slapped Axel on the 9th. After that they shot Chloé yelling at Lucas. Axel was still out of it due to the slap he’d gotten earlier that he hadn’t expected. At 3am, they finished with Lucas injuring his hands. Axel cracked the metacarpus in his hand and only told David two days later.

Leo has talked about the coming out bench scene and said Yann took it a bit too far and was too dramatic, he was like “i don’t know if i can say that… but c’mon… I mean. C’mon… that’s your best friend… who cares if he didn’t tell you right away, he had bigger problems on his mind, right?”He would have done it differently.

The “viens on n’en parle pas” scene was shot in 50 minutes in the middle of the night on the second day of shooting. Marilyn and Axel’s emotions were briming under the surface so it was one of the easiest scene to shoot.

The hardest scene to shoot for David in s3 was the intervention clip. It was the second day of shooting, the 4th clip of the day. Axel’s first take was not good enough and David was scared it would set the tone for the season. He had a stern talk with Axel. Thankfully, they shot a second time and it was the right one, everyone on set was crying and Axel was completely drained.  

The scene where they go get the couch from the creepy place is the one they shot last for season 3.

The paint scene: they only had one try. Axel and Maxence hadn’t shot together for a week, David had done it on purpose and they’d missed each other. It was shot on a Friday at the exact time it was supposed to happen IRL. The whole thing lasts 14 minutes long. David took their pants off because they were slipping too much. Xavier almost stopped filming he was like “is he serious? did he just take their pants off??”. They shot a part when one of them slips on the ground and the other follows but that didn’t make the cut. There were 25 people on set, everyone in a suit to protect from the paint, but Axel and Maxence forgot everyone and just got lost in their characters. When David yelled cut, Axel and Maxence didn’t hear him and kept making out. David had to separate them. Then they all were so happy that they yelled their joy but then saw all the people who were behind the camera, and everyone was crying, like they had witnessed something too intimate. They showered for an hour, emptied 2 bottles of soap and even then it wasn’t enough, Axel still had paint running down his neck at a party that evening. The music used on set was Dreamer, the Khlar remix. Maxence was upset it wasn’t the one they ended up using in the clip, it felt like a betrayal because it “wasn’t the song they had made love to”.

Maxence fought with the costume department over the briefs he was wearing in the paint scene, because they had shot the PONI scene first and he could remember which ones he was wearing for the PONI scene and he wanted to wear the same ones. He was sure people would notice.

The first scene Maxence ever shot was the PONI scene. 

The boat scene was quite special. It was a big moment for Maxence, he was extremely nervous, so David reduced the team on set as much as he could. Maxence got upset at Axel for being too present during the scene. Being used to a theatre stage, Axel is always a bit over the top, eating his ham with a flourish, stuff like that, but this was supposed to be Eliott’s big scene. Maxence asked for a break and told David that if Axel didn’t tone it down, he’d kill him. That also got resolved quickly. 

The Remember Me scene: the priest is Lula’s dad. Lula and Niels both make a cameo in the church. They forgot to warn Axel that a car was coming when he’s running so his reaction is genuine. He was running so fast, the minivan with the camera couldn’t keep up so they shot it twice. They shot Lucas finding Eliott under the bridge just after shooting the first kiss. Maxence only had 4 minutes to get into the right state of mind which was extremely challenging and during that time he had to change his clothes, dry his hair and redo his makeup. Axel wasn’t feeling very well, he was exhausted after having shot 4 clips that day, but David told him he could do it so he ran on the path to the bridge harder than ever (David thought he was going to hurt his sinews) and when he fell to his knees, he was close to passing out, you can actually hear when he says the first “t’es pas tout seul” that he’s about to throw up / can’t breathe properly. They only shot that part once and after it was done David told them they should hug each other because what they had just done with Lucas and Eliott was precious and a moment to remember.  

There was supposed to be a scene after the Remember scene but it was cut. Eliott is sleeping, Lucas brings him food and starts reading his book and then Eliott wakes up. They say hi, Eliott is confused about the time it is, it’s already late afternoon. He says he needs to leave, but Lucas tells him no. He keeps saying he has to go, he has to go to his parents. Lucas tells him it’s fine, they’ve been warned of where he is. But he says he’s got to leave anyway. Lucas asks him why he keeps insisting he needs to leave and Eliott tells him he just doesn’t want Lucas to see him like this. Lucas tells him he doesn’t mind. Then he starts teasing him, saying Eliott just wants to leave because he doesn’t want to own up to the fact that he lied to him. Eliott is confused. Lucas reminds him that he’d said there was no way he would ever be able to sleep next to a guy that hot (on the boat) and yet here they are actually taking naps. So Eliott must have lied to Lucas about finding him hot. Eliott says he’s an idiot and Lucas tells him that at least he’s not a liar at that what matters is that he is his idiot. “Congrats, you’re now the owner of an idiot… more or less hot” Eliott tells him he’s won and asks what they should do now. Lucas answers that they should start by saying hi properly and they kiss, and when they pull back they just look at each other whispering “salut”. Axel said he was upset at David for cutting the scene because it was so soft and intimate, he called him when he watched the episode to ask why he cut it, but it would have been too repetitive with the following Lundi 17h21 clip.

Lundi 17h21 is the second clip Maxence shot. Lucas’s “T’es beau quand tu rigoles” wasn’t scripted, Axel changed the script, he was supposed to say something about liking seeing Eliott smile.

The Je t’aime scene: the first shot they did was the most emotional one, it was one of the hardest scenes emotionally for Axel. He was crying so so much, he had tears and snot everywhere, and Maxence was just wiping it away so tenderly that David thought about keeping that shot but the snot was REALLY disgusting so they didn’t keep it. They shot it a few more times, except that then Maxence had to leave. So the shot of Lucas saying Moi aussi is actually to David. Axel said it didn’t feel weird because he does love David so it felt true.

SEASON 4

Assa sat down with the team before they wrote anything for the season and told them her whole life story. It lasted 4 hours and she cried when reading the script because they had included so many things she had told them, it felt like her and Imane were one.

Making Assa dance was Philippine’s idea. David asked her what she thought about when thinking of Assa, something that was really her and Philippine said “Dada, you should see her dance”

Moussa and Assa knew each other before since they had filmed together 5 years prior, a movie in which they already were siblings. They feel like siblings in real life.

The worst clip to shoot was on Lais’s first day of shooting, it was the bus clip. The shooting conditions were terrible, there was too much noise, and the crew was tired from having shot the 3 bus stop clips from season 3 earlier that day. David was convinced there would be nothing to save and they would have to rent another bus but the team worked their magic in post prod and it turned out amazing.

They shot the scene with Imane, Lucas and Eliott in class the day after Halloween. Maxence was at a party the night before and lost track of time. He had to take a taxi straight from the party to the set at 6am and showed up in full zombie costume and makeup.

Charles come back: it had been cloudy and raining all day but the moment the camera was on the girls’ faces, a ray of sunlight appeared and the wind blew in their hair, making it a real dramatic moment. Too good to pass on, it’s the shot they kept.

The fight between Lucas and Eliott that we vaguely hear in the background was just gibberish. Axel and Maxence hadn’t prepared anything and Axel just ended up shouting at Maxence things like YOU LIED TO ME BEFORE ABOUT LUCILLE YOU MIGHT BE DOING IT AGAIN ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE and Maxence NO I WOULD NEVER - BUT YOU DID - NO I WOULDN’T - YES YOU DID - NO and they kept going in circles so David was like “guys…. please, you might want to start screaming about something else or this is gonna sound very repetitive” but in the end we can barely hear anything so it didn’t matter much

When Alex comes to pick up Emma to go to the cinema, Assa had a break down and couldn’t stop laughing, hiding under a blanket and making all the girls laugh too with her. David had to scold them a bit to get them to stop.

Lais also ruined a clip by laughing for 15 minutes straight, it’s the clip at Imane’s house when they talk about the fair. It was the longest 15 minutes of the crew’s life. 

The oui oui song during Daphné’s birthday party wasn’t planned, the team just lost control of the cast. Axel started it and everyone followed. The cast are actually terrible extras. They are too dramatic and noticeable in the background so party scenes like Daphné’s birthday were a nightmare to shoot. 

Assa and Laïs rehearsed the Unknown dance clip every chance they got between every take, everyone kept tripping on them in the corridors.

The last sequences they filmed were actually the last clips at Imane’s house for the Eïd. Axel isn’t in the last shot because he had to leave for his play. He actually ruined the very last clip of season 4 by shouting his goodbyes to David from across the corner.

SEASON 5

The auditions for season 5 and 6 were held in June. Lucas was spotted through his youtube channel and asked to audition. 

Coline learned sign language by herself after an initiation class with the whole team. She started signing in July and has been practicing ever since. Robin took a one week class in September and then kept practicing by himself and with the D/deaf people on set. David and the rest of the team also took an initiation class.

Robin doesn’t like water and was anxious about the scenes in the pool. David got in the water with Xavier, Robin and Winona to reassure him and direct them better. They limited the number of extras around the pool because of that.

The place where Eliott works is where David used to work when he was younger.

Coline wrote a song for the season

They couldn’t leave the mural in the high school so they took it off the wall (it wasn’t actually painted on the wall itself) and cut it into pieces. There are a few pieces framed on the walls of Lucas and Eliott’s flat.

[random-imagines-blog]

Moment {James Ransone x Reader Oneshot}

Requested by: @buckybarton03​ Wordcount: 2631 Summary: At an IT Cast Party, you fall into a really good, long conversation with a friend of James’s. But he couldn’t be jealous, could he?

With your mouth open, you couldn’t help but stare at everyone who was at the party. You were close with James Ransone, sure, but you didn’t think you would actually get invited to this A-List event! You were dressed to the nines, along with everyone else, and you stayed by James’ side as he went straight to the catering table, filling a small plate with snacks. You were too excited to eat, and too nervous that you would do something embarrassing, like spit a cracker on James McAvoy. “Oh my God, there’s Jessica. She’s absolutely stunning in person, I’m going to pass out.” You had to hold onto James’s arm for steadiness, because you felt like you were going to swoon. You were breaking one of the only rules that he had set for you this evening. Don’t embarrass him. Though when he asked you that, he was probably joking. Now there was a real risk.

“Okay, keep you away from Chastain,” James muttered under his breath, handing you a glass of champagne since you didn’t grab any food. “Just have this. And try to relax. It’s a party, not a red carpet. Be cool.”

“Cool, cool, cool,” You said, sipping at the champagne. “Yeah, I can be cool,” You said, your eyes flitting around. So many celebrities in one place, and all of them, every single one, was a gorgeous human being. “Do you mind if I just stay around you for a while? I’m still nervous.”

“I hope so, you’re my plus one. It would be rude if you just left me,” James laughed. You laughed along with him and for the hundredth time that day, you were glad that you knew someone as cool as him. He was a diamond in the rough, and a very good looking one if you did say so yourself. He was wearing a nice suit, but a casual shirt underneath it, not getting too dressed up. He looked as relaxed as you wanted to feel.

He introduced you to everyone, slowly. It wasn’t a big meet and greet, it went more organically than that. To both yours and James’ delight, you were able to keep yourself handled, even when you met Jessica Chastain. “So you’re the one that James has been talking about,” The beautiful redhead said, after you introduced yourself.

“Whatever he said, I didn’t do it. Unless it was really cool, then it was all me,” You joked, making her laugh. “No, but really, he goes on about how awesome you all are too, all the time.”

“And it’s always y/n this, and y/n that,” Jessica teased, nudging James, making him fall a little pink. You looked up at him with surprise. The fact that she remembered your name so quickly proved that she wasn’t just being polite. He really talked about you.

“Well, I’m the lucky one then, if the cast of the best movie of the year all know my name,” You said, trying to change the conversation around before you started to feel all warm and fluffy. James McAvoy joined the conversation, and then Bill Hader, and it became full of laughs. Very funny, all of them.

“I didn’t think you were real. I thought you were some sort of imaginary friend,” Bill Hader said to you, a serious expression on his face. “He made you sound too good to be true.”

“You know what’s funny?” You asked, finishing the last of your champagne. A caterer came around and took it for you, along with James’s empty plate. He was being rather quiet. “Before we left, he told me not to embarrass him. I’m starting to think that message was meant for you.”

Hader laughed pretty hard at that one, and eventually the conversation got off of you, and then back onto the movie. There was a newcomer to the conversation - Andy Bean, who only had a small role in the film but it was Stan so it was still a big character. He had moved in between you and Jessica, and you noticed that he was standing quite close. And you found yourself not really minding.

“So, did you like the movie?” Andy asked, and you found yourself in an almost one on one conversation with him. The other actors were drifting off, but James stayed by your side.

“Of course I did!” You said, surprised that he was even asking such a thing. “It was different from the book in a lot of ways, but it was really good. I mean, obviously I wish that you had more scenes but that’s more a problem with Stephen than with you. But there is one thing I wish that they hadn’t changed from the book...”

“And what’s that?” Andy asked.

You looked up at James and grinned. He groaned, figuring that something humiliating was coming his way. He was right, as per usual.

“Can you imagine Eddie wearing a little Chauffers hat? They should have stuck to the limo business, just for that alone.” You said, ruffling James’s short hair. He swatted but never actually came close to hitting you. You laughed and ducked, which only made you all the closer to Andy.

“I’m getting more food,” He grumbled and walked off, leaving just you and the other actor. He was smiling at you, and you smiled back.

“So you two seem very close,” Andy said, watching James leave to go back to where the buffet was.

“That’s what everyone keeps saying tonight,” You said, turning to look at Andy since you could see James’s back anytime you wanted, really. This was to meet new people, to have fun. “All I am going to say, before the gossip magazines start showing up, is that he is one of the best people that I know. And we’re going to leave it at that.”

“Okay, okay, defensive,” Andy said, raising an eyebrow. “He is a good guy though. I hope I get to work with him again. And the kids because they were actually really hard shoes to fill.”

“Oh my God, the kids,” You said, nodding in agreement. It turned out that you both had a lot of the same views on things, especially the movie. You wished again that he had gotten more screen time so that you could have seen him more. He was more of a stand-out guy than the movie had given him credit for.

“So yeah, I actually did do that bird jigsaw puzzle all by myself, and I’m proud of that,” Andy said, well into his third glass of champagne. You were as well, since every time Andy grabbed himself one, he’d get one for you. He was being a perfect gentlemen and you were growing impressed. It helped you to feel a lot more free, and a lot less nervous about making a good impression. It seems that James had done that for you.

“And how many pieces was that - fifty?” You teased, making him bark with laughter.

“A thousand, I’ll have you know. I worked on it when they were getting the rest of the scene ready!” He protested.

“Okay, I guess I’ll have to watch it again, just to admire your amazing puzzle skills.” You smiled. He grinned back at you, his smile rather lopsided. “

Two more drinks. The waitress just kept coming around with plates of it. Champagne was a celebration drink and there was a lot to celebrate tonight. You were getting pretty tipsy at this point, and you were so wrapped up in your conversation with Andy that you didn’t notice people were starting to leave. You were laughing at one of his on-set anecdotes when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned to see James standing there, hands in his pockets, face looking a little down.

“Cheer up buttercup!” You said, trying to give him your half-emptied glass. “Here, this is making me happy, so maybe it will do the same to you. You’re looking dour.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t expect to get lonely tonight,” James said, not sounding impressed at all. However, you were in too a good a mood to deal with his grumpiness. You wrapped your arm around his and laid your head upon his shoulder.

“There, you’re not lonely now,” You said, motioning Andy to come and join the hug. He did, chuckling the entire time, wrapping his arms around the both of you. James stiffened, you could feel that much, but you didn’t let go of him.

“I was thinking it’s about time that we head back to the hotel anyway,” James said, after Andy had let you two go.

“Oh, yeah, sure.” You said, excited at the prospect of the big hotel beds that were in your double room. “Andy, I must get your number.”

“I must give it to you!” He said, taking hold of a napkin and scrawled some numbers on there. You took it with a smile, folding it in your hand so the ink wouldn’t transfer onto your skin. “It was lovely to meet you, y/n. And always good to see you, James.”

“Yeah, you too,” James said, putting his hand lightly on your shoulder and lead you out of the party to where the car was waiting. You slipped inside first, getting yourself comfortable when James came in after you. He seemed to be in the most sullen mood. A little too-Eddie like, you noticed.

“Okay, come on buttercup,” You said, putting your hand on his knee and gave it a squeeze. “Fess up. There’s something on your mind and I want to know what it is.”

James sighed dramatically, looking out the window. I bent forward, trying to swerve under him to get him to look at me. “Quit it,” He said, but you noticed that his mouth went up a twitch. He couldn’t stay mad at you.

“Come on, please? It was a fun party, you shouldn’t be scowling.”

“You and Andy seemed to be getting along pretty well.”

“And that’s why you’re being a frowny face? I thought you wanted me to get along with your friends... Unless...” You gasped in surprise. Due to the drink, it came out more dramatic than intentioned. “Are you being jealous, Mr Ransome?”

“No,” He said, but he said it too quickly. “Why would I be jealous?”

“Well, there’s two possible reasons. One is that you don’t want me close to Andy because you wanted his attention all night or...” You blinked at him, realization coming across you. “Or the second is I’ve been a bad date because I spent almost the whole time talking to someone else. Gee, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” He said, grunting, still refusing to look over at you. “You were having fun-”

“But I was being rude.” You put your head on his shoulder, trying to entice him to look at you again. You even did your puppy dog pout, which finally made him catch your eye. You made sure to keep up the contact so that he wouldn’t be able to look away again. “James, I’m really sorry. I just got kind of carried away. It’s really nice to have someone else to talk to about you.”

“You were talking about me?” He asked, in a tone of disbelief.

“Quite a bit actually. What else do I have to talk about? You’re the person that I do everything with. And that I make all my plans with. I was telling him about the trip that we’re going to take to the beach in the Summer, just you and I. He said it sounded fun, but I think I got the point across that it’s just supposed to be the two of us.”

“Oh,” James said, having the good sense to feel a little embarrassed. “I didn’t know that you were talking about me.”

“Should have,” You said, noticing his fingers inching closer to your leg. “You’re my favorite person in the whole world. Am I your favorite?”

“You have to ask?” He questioned you, making you grin like you had the first time that you had met him and realized just how your life was going to be positively impacted.

“Yup,” You said, popping the P. You took hold of his hand, lifted it, and set it down upon your own thigh so he would have to feel the luxurious fabric of your outfit. He stiffened in his seat, but his fingers went a little further, squeezing your thigh. “I’m sorry I ruined our date. Can I make it up to you?”

“You’ve been drinking, y/n,” James said, sounding apprehensive.

“Liquid courage,” You said, leaning in. You leaned in to finally kiss those lips that you’ve been wanting for a while, but never had the bravery to go for. But he stopped you by turning his head, so you got his cheek. You pouted with disappointment, and he sighed, taking his hand back. What a drama queen, you thought.

“I can’t, not when you’ve been drinking. If you were sober maybe, but-”

“I only had a couple of drinks. I know what I’m doing. I’m still in control of myself. James. Just ... please?”

James looked worried, stressed and a little happy at the same time. It was a weird mix to see on his face, but you found it endearing. Even more so when you realized that he was rejecting you, not because he wanted to, but because he didn’t want to take advantage. “No,” He said again.

The car pulled in front of the hotel, and he got out quickly, but still stuck around to offer you his hand to get out onto the sidewalk.

“Okay. I’ll give up - for now. But don’t think that these are just tipsy thoughts,” You said, holding onto his side as you entered the hotel, making for the elevator so you could go to your room. “Because I’ve kinda loved you for a long time and I was just so happy that I could finally tell someone about it that I almost ruined it.”

“You didn’t ruin anything - hey, mind the buttons,” He said, as you nearly tumbled inside, your hip hitting a couple of buttons for floors that you weren’t going to. It was going to be a long ride up to your floor. You smiled at him teasingly and pressed a couple more, making him groan. “What are you doing?”

“Making the ride last longer, you said gleefully. “I know you don’t want me to kiss you but can I hug instead?”

“Yeah, I guess,” He said. You wrapped your arms around his neck and nuzzled your face against his shoulder, taking in the smell of the cologne that he was wearing that night. “It’s not that I don’t want to...” He said, as the doors opened and then closed on an empty floor.

“Do you love me too?” You asked, trying to feel his heartbeat through your own chest, but all that you could place was yours. It was going quickly.

“You know I do,” He said, more to himself than to you.

“So I can kiss you in the morning when I’m sober?”

“I.. I guess you could.”

“Good. Come on elevator, I gotta go to bed so I can wake up!”

[cosmic-hearts]

castles in the air | lee donghyuck | one

lee donghyuck x female reader

genre; enemies-to-lovers, friendship, romance, fluff, angst

warnings; none

foreword; in which even though you might be a real-life princess with a prince promised to you right from the start, you won’t be getting your happy ever after.

next chapter >> 

“Which dress would you like to wear tonight, miss?”

Not a pink dress. Donghyuck hates pink. 

You resent yourself for it, but it’s the first thought that pops into your mind when the nice boutique lady presents your options to you: a peachy pink Alex Perry gown that reminds you of what you used to like when you were ten, a bold red Lia Stubella one that screamed movie star (except you clearly aren’t one), and a glamorous Elie Saab champagne silk dress that was honestly beautiful but had a plunging neckline that was a little too low for your comfort. 

You eye the pink dress warily, remembering the first time you met Lee Donghyuck. Back when you had even less of a say in the clothes you wore, your mother had forced you into a stiff candy pink dress with ribbons all around the waist. You felt like a walking stick of cotton candy, but your mum insisted that you looked adorable. Donghyuck gave you the stink eye all throughout dinner, and when you privately asked him why, he mumbled something about having a raging hatred for pink. 

It would be a hilarious anecdote if you could look back on it fondly with Donghyuck, safe in the knowledge that you two were best friends now, but reality is quite the opposite. You’re not best friends, neither are you two even friends. 

No. Definitely not pink, you think to yourself, mentally crossing it out even though a part of you wanted to wear it just to see the look on his face, to elicit some sort of reaction from him; it didn’t matter if it was one of disgust. It would be better than nothing.

Because resentment was the only form of emotion he could ever seem to spare you. 

—

Lee Donghyuck watches Sohui as she slings the tie around his neck and does a perfect knot, her deft fingers occasionally grazing his chest. She’s clad in a simple, off-shoulder white dress and wears minimal makeup, her inky black hair a glossy cascade down her back. 

She looks like an angel. 

“Are you sure it’s okay for me to go?” Her gentle voice lures Donghyuck from his thoughts and he smiles at her, placing an arm around her waist and drawing her close to him.

“You’re my girlfriend. Of course it’s okay.”

Her gaze is downcast, lips pouted in worry. “But your parents don’t know about me. And what about her—,”

“That’s why you need to come with me tonight. So they can know about you,” Donghyuck tries to keep his tone light to mask his worry; deep down, he too knows that tonight is going to be precarious and defining, and it could either make or break his relationship with Sohui.

When they reach the hotel, Donghyuck laces his fingers through hers, and he’s not sure if it’s to comfort Sohui or himself. He doesn’t miss the way her eyes widen at the intricate glass chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, the artful statues of greek Goddesses posing in all their prehistoric glory, and of course, the people parading all around in their finest evening wear like nobility. It is moments like these when he’s painfully reminded of the sheer gulf between the worlds they come from; his reality exists only in her wildest dreams.

“Donghyuck-ah!”

He whirls round at the sound of his mother screeching his name, bracing himself for the whirlwind of interrogation that is sure to consume him. He tightens his grip on her hand, wondering if he and Sohui will make it out alive. 

Mr Lee hurries towards him, the click-clack of her heels against the marble tiles like a mocking countdown towards his impending doom. As expected, she stops short when she sees Sohui, hand interlinked with her son’s, her gaze hardening into one of icy judgement. Mr Lee raises a questioning eyebrow but remains silent. 

And so it begins. 

“Who is this, Donghyuck?” Mrs Lee asks in a tone of apparent civility but she doesn’t bother masking her cold appraisal of Sohui as she assesses her simple dress, lack of jewelry and unimpressive hairdo, in stark contrast to her own immaculate styling and head-to-toe designer wear. 

“Mother, Father, this is Kim Sohui,” Donghyuck says, wrapping an arm around Sohui’s shoulders, “and she’s my girlfriend.”

If looks could kill, Sohui would be writhing on the floor right now. 

“I see. It’s nice to meet you, Sohui. How long have you been dating my son?”

The poor girl stares down at the floor, fidgeting. “Four months?”

“And you know that my son’s engaged? And he has been for a period of time way longer than four months.”

The color dissipates from Sohui’s cheeks and she pales instantly. “Yes, Mrs Lee.”

“We can deal with this later, mother—,”

“Mr and Mrs Lee!”

The Lee family meeting is cut short with the arrival of another family; your own. 

Donghyuck’s eyes are immediately drawn to you; he clenches his jaw as a film descends over his eyes, that familiar feeling of mutiny washing over him.

He takes in your silk champagne dress, no doubt flown in from the most expensive Parisian or Lebanese designer. He takes in your flawless half-updo that’s been styled to perfection, not a curl of hair out of place. He takes in your polished, elegant strides, six-inch heels notwithstanding. Everything about you is immaculate and impeccable; you appear entirely self-possessed and composed, the very portrait of style and sophistication, grace and glamour. 

He doesn’t take his eyes off you as you greet his parents, a cordial smile playing on your lips when his parents gush over how beautiful you look tonight. 

“And who might this young lady be?” Donghyuck flinches when your mother asks, her sharp eyes pinned on Sohui like a predator does prey. 

“Oh, she’s just a friend of Donghyuck’s,” Mrs Lee says, at the exact moment Donghyuck blurts out “my girlfriend”. 

While everyone falls into stunned silence, anger radiating off his parents in potently palpable waves, Donghyuck’s eyes flit over to you immediately to gauge your reaction. Would this news be enough to shock you, to cause you distress, to cause your perfect facade to crumble for once? Because for once in your life, things weren’t going according to your perfect plan, and they were now out of your control? The very thought causes a sense of triumph to swell through his chest. 

But you don’t even bat an eyelid. 

Without missing a beat, you break out into a warm smile, extending your hand to Sohui’s. “Hi, my name is Y/N. It’s lovely to meet you.”

“I’m so sorry about my son,” Mrs Lee says, absolutely flabbergasted, “we had absolutely no idea about any of this.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” you say, and though Donghyuck tries his hardest to read your expression, you do a perfect job at keeping it inscrutable; he’s unable to figure you out. “We might be engaged, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t date other people, right?”

Your parents look aghast at your flippant reaction, and it nearly causes you to giggle.

“Your daughter is so understanding, as always,” Mrs Lee gushes, “Hyuck really doesn’t deserve her.”

Donghyuck’s head hangs low as he clenches his fists, his mother’s final verdict like a dagger aimed straight for his heart.

He can never win against you. 

—

After Mrs Lee banishes Sohui from tonight’s function, Donghyuck vanishes. You set off in search of him, feeling a sort of responsibility for what just happened even though you’re not exactly sure what you should be held accountable for. 

You traverse through the crowded expanse of the ballroom, stopping every couple of minutes for people to gush over how lovely your dress is, how exquisite you look tonight (you were indeed the daughter of the largest fashion conglomerate in Seoul; there was no way anyone would tell you your fashion sense was hideous). You smile and either demur or thank them politely, depending on how sycophantic they choose to be. You’re good at playing the game; you’ve been raised your whole life learning the ropes of how to be a people pleaser, how to be charismatic and alluring, how to draw people to you and your cause. 

And it’s always worked with just about everyone in your life. Except, of course, for Lee Donghyuck.

The one person you need to charm the most simply refuses to fall under your spell. 

It’s frustrating, but more than that, it’s terribly unsettling; is he able to see through your veneer of poise and confidence to the weak, less-than-worthy girl you’re so afraid to acknowledge? You’ve always believed that vulnerability wouldn’t look good on you, and that’s why you try so hard, in every aspect of your life, to maintain that flawless guise, that charade of effortless excellence. Yet, with a single withering sneer or chilly glare, Lee Donghyuck manages to strike down that meticulously manipulated illusion you’d gone to great lengths to construct.

You don’t like it. 

You shake off all unpleasant thoughts and slip on your game face as you step out onto the balcony where a familiar lone figure stands deep in thought, a forlorn silhouette in the darkness of the night. The wind whips through your hair as you move to stand next to him; you produce your shawl from your purse and wrap it around your bare arms. 

“Hi.”

You don’t look at Donghyuck; a part of you is afraid to see that ever-simmering resentment on his face. But he makes no reply, gazing out at the cityscape beneath you two. You pluck up the courage to continue.

“I’m sorry about Sohui. She seems really nice.”

You hear him exhale, a heavy sound that dissolves into the breeze. Yet he remains silent.

“If you’d like, I can talk to Mrs Lee—,”

“Shut up.”

The words on the tip of your tongue grind to an abrupt halt and die. Donghyuck finally turns towards you, his dark eyes piercing through to your very core.

“Why did you do that?”

Steeling yourself, you match his stare. “I really do think it’s perfectly fine for us to be dating other people. I know you don’t like me, and I won’t force you to. But I just want to remind you that what needs to be done has to be done, when the time comes.”

Donghyuck smirks. “You think I’ll marry you?”

Onward with the diplomatic route you continue. “I hate to put it this way, but you have no choice. We were betrothed to each other since we were kids and we’re bound by a formal contract—,”

At this, Donghyuck grabs your wrist roughly and you lurch forward, torso mere centimetres away from his. He inches his face closer to yours; you can count the beauty spots splayed across the expanse of his honey-gold skin, and the musky scent of his cologne makes your head spin.

You almost gulp in his face. Almost.

“Do you want to marry me?” He asks, all sardonic bitterness gone from his voice. It almost sounds like a genuine question, like he really wants to know your opinion on the matter.

You take a few seconds to clear your head, to formulate a prudent and politically correct reply that your parents would approve of.

But Donghyuck seems to be able to read your mind. “I don’t want a model answer, Y/N. I’m asking you what you really want.”

You chew your lower lip in unease, avoiding his probing gaze. What do you really want? All your life, all you thought you really wanted was to fulfil all the plans your parents had laid out for you even before you were born. To be a good daughter to your parents, a good student to your teachers, a good heiress to the family company. And eventually, a good wife to Donghyuck. Because all these were the means to an eventual end—wealth, material success, approval from your parents, and with those, you’d assumed, would automatically come some form of happiness (a nebulous concept you never truly understood or appreciated). Why should you question your parents, when they’d told you time and again that they only had your best interests at heart?

But now, being faced with Donghyuck’s resolute gaze, the defiant tilt of his chin, with his fingers burning into your skin, you’re not so sure anymore. 

What do you want?

“I-I don’t know,” you mutter softly, so softly that it almost gets carried away by the wind into the night. But Donghyuck catches it, and he doesn’t miss the quiver in your voice that tells him it isn’t very often you’re unsure of something and you admit it. His grip on your wrist loosens and he remarks, “I didn’t think that was possible.”

“What?”

“You not knowing something.”

Your cheeks almost colour with embarrassment. You snatch your hand out of his grip, take a step back and straighten up, ashamed of having let your mask of seamless composure slip, even if it was only for an instant. Looking him directly in the eye, you say in a sharp tone, “Don’t ever touch me again without my permission.”

With that, you turn around, your shawl flapping violently behind you in the breeze and hitting Donghyuck in the cheek. 

He watches you return to the ballroom and disappear into the ceaseless sea of designer gowns and overpriced tuxedos, right where you belong. But he can’t forget the flash of vulnerability he’d seen in your eyes, the shadow of doubt that made him think maybe you weren’t the infallible robot he always believed you were. 

Maybe you too, like him, want to break free from the confines of this cursed matrimonial match.

—

You sit at your desk, working on a history essay that you normally would have completed hours ago but it’s 7pm and you’re not even halfway through yet. You glance outside your bedroom window, or your ivory tower as you like to call it; your house was basically a castle set amid carefully cultivated gardens, and nights of rushing essays made you feel like Rapunzel stuck in an endless cycle of work. 

Anyone would say you were practically a princess. Born with the privilege of not a silver but golden spoon in your mouth, you virtually had the world at your fingertips. Your every whim and fancy came true; all you had to do was ask and you would receive.

But no one understood that this just made it even more difficult to prove that you are worthy. 

Do you even deserve everything you have? This was a nagging, disturbing question that you would likely never have the answer to.

Before you can delve too deeply into your existential issues, your phone pings with a text. 

Lee Donghyuck

Hi. 

You almost drop your phone. You had Donghyuck’s contact saved because your parents forced you two to text each other obligatory birthday wishes and congratulations whenever either of you did well in something. The last text was Donghyuck congratulating you on winning the debate nationals half a year ago. His texts always had this note of forced civility, like he’d rather be skinning a cat than sending you a text. But you hadn’t won anything recently, nor was it your birthday, so why did he deign to contact you?

Lee Donghyuck

Can we meet? I need to discuss something with you. 

You can’t forget the way he’d momentarily disarmed you, or the way you’d callously left him on the balcony that night. Why would he want anything to do with you after that horribly awkward encounter?

You

When?

Lee Donghyuck

Right now, if you’re free. 

It’s funny how your first thought is, what the hell am I going to wear? Then again, it’s not like you have regular midnight escapades with the boy who regards you as the bane of his existence; how would you know the dress code for such an occasion? You end up slipping into your baby pink Adidas tracksuit, the one you usually wear for your night runs—Donghyuck’s strange loathing for pink be damned. You have no intention to endear yourself to him, at least not tonight.

You slip out through the back gate and into the rose garden, where Donghyuck is waiting in the pavilion. His hands are in his pockets and he looks deep in thought, like he’s ruminating on contemporary problems of the 21st century when in reality, you’re sure he’s probably just dreaming about that girlfriend of his. He doesn’t even seem to mind your all-pink ensemble.

“Hey Donghyuck,” you say coolly, determinedly looking ahead of you and refusing to look at him, “let’s make this quick, please. I have an essay to write.” You almost immediately regret how petty that sounds, nothing like the businesslike tone you were striving for.

“Fine.” Did you imagine the mild disdain in his voice? “I just have a proposal for you that I think you might be interested in; I was wondering if you’d want to form an alliance.”

Now that's businesslike. You turn towards him, curiosity aroused. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t want to marry you; you know that clearly enough. But I’m sure you wouldn’t want to marry me either.”

You remain silent, unsure where he’s heading with this.

“The thing is, we never really tried to get close to each other; maybe that’s why our parents are so insistent that we’d be a good match. My parents don't listen to me when I tell them I don’t want to marry you; they say that I’ll get over it, which is bullshit, because I know what I want and it’s not you,” he says, looking over at you, “no offence.”

You smirk. “None taken. Please go on.”

“So if we show them that we’re making the effort to get to know each other better, but it doesn’t work out in the end, maybe they’ll let us off. I mean, mine won’t, but you can tell your parents that you don’t want to marry me; they’ll surely listen to you because you’re literally their darling princess. My parents will have no say then.” The sneer in his tone definitely isn’t imaginary this time.

You consider this for a moment, trying to find loopholes in his plan. “What exactly does ‘getting to know each other better’ entail?”

At this, Donghyuck takes a deep breath. “I need you to keep an open mind about this because it’s for the greater good, Y/N. It’s going to be painful, but I think we should pretend to date each other.”

You keep your expression stoic when really, you feel your heartbeat picking up speed and a surge of heat diffuses across your cheekbones.

Lee Donghyuck never fails to surprise you. 

“And your girlfriend is okay with this?”

“Yes, I’ve told her about it; she gave me her full support. After all, it’s all fake anyway. And this way we can break off our engagement faster, which is what we both want.” 

You know you should say no but you can’t deny that this was indeed a rather expedient plan. And you would never admit it, but you can’t seem to suppress that clandestine urge that had been bubbling inside of you ever since that encounter with Donghyuck—the urge to, for once in your life, take control of your own decisions. To snatch the reins of your fate away from your parents, to do something for yourself instead of for the people around you. This would be your one and only act of rebellion, the lone stain of sin upon your spotless record of dutiful daughter. The thought fills you with a dark thrill of exhilaration and sends electricity charging through your veins, a feeling foreign to your body. Almost immediately you feel years younger, like an errant child about to undertake a secret mission in the forbidden forest.

“Deal,” you say, extending your hand to Donghyuck’s and finally meeting his gaze with your own. “I look forward to working with you, Lee Donghyuck.”

[dyanlzbb]

Bucky and the Toy Phone (2/3)

Character Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x OFC

Word Count:  2072

Warnings:  none that I could think of.

Bucky took his time to sort out his feelings. He tried to read, to watch movies, to take long walks in the park... but during those activities all he could think of was Chiara and Ethan. And her ex… he was fearing that he may come back one day and be interested in them, reducing his chance to be in their lives to a zero.

Pepper invited more often Chiara and Ethan with the excuse of work and sharing anecdotes before her daughter was born. But they knew perfectly that the reason behind all of those invitations was to make her and Bucky to interact with mixed effects.

Some days, Bucky would start a conversation with Chiara only to be interrupted by Ethan throwing a tantrum or trying to get full attention from his mother. Some days, Ethan wanted to play with Bucky and Steve, usually letting Bucky to play the bad guy against Captain America and his tiny sidekick.

Sam noticed the conflictive attitude from the boy and stated to call him little devil. He even mentioned once that Ethan was jealous of Bucky and that was the reason behind his hesitancy.  

Chiara and Ethan became regulars in the Avengers compound; they visited at least 3 times a week, sometimes every day. That was until Chiara got really sick. For days, Chiara had been under the weather, but she still needed to go to work and care for her son.

However, she couldn’t run far from illness for too long. It didn’t help that Ethan’s usual nanny had to attend a congress from college during that week. So on top of her usual work and being a single mother, Chiara had to deal with a very aggressive flu.

Luckily her boss noticed the red watery eyes, the running nose and the coughing and sent her home for the weekend a lucky Thursday. Chiara was grateful until she realized that Ethan was especially energetic that day. On their way home he kept pointing at every car, house and tree he could see.

She entered home and put Ethan down in the living room while she went to serve the take away food she got before picking up the boy from school, in no way she wanted to make dinner under her condition. After they ate, she poured a cup of tea and sat in the couch watching over Ethan who was drawing on the coffee table.

Ethan was coloring a page from a Power Rangers coloring book and turned to show his work to his mother, just to find her sleeping. He moved closer to her and tried to open her eyes, just to listen to her grunting and turning over a bit. Ethan stared once again at his mother and stayed still for over a minute. Nothing changed; his mother wasn’t paying attention to him.

So he did what any reasonable toddler would do, he went to grab some toys from his room and brought them to the coffee table, being one of them, the toy phone that his uncle Tony gave him.

The thing with that particular toy phone is that, as always, Tony went over the top with it. So when Ethan was playing after his mother took an involuntary nap, he pressed the number 0 and the button on the side and was connected to F.R.I.D.A.Y. immediately.

The I.A. voice spoke to the boy. – Ethan, how can I be of assistance today? – Tony had programmed a direct line in case of an emergency, something that Ethan could dial easily in case he needed an Avengers intervention. He never imagined that the kid would call him accidentally, which was obvious if you think about it, unless you’re the genius Tony Stark.

The little one wasn’t scared of the I.A. voice. You could blame the TV and all of the internet apps of him being familiar with a mysterious voice, so the boy wasn’t afraid to converse with the immaterial being – Yes, wanna call Bucky. – He was the first person that came to his mind.  

Over the previous weeks, Bucky tried to get close to Ethan and Ethan was happy to get his attention. Not only because he was friends with Captain America, one of his heroes… but because he really liked Bucky, but somehow he also couldn’t stand him at times.

Following the instructions from Tony, the I.A. connected the call to the Avenger in question.

Bucky was exercising at the gym. Doing repetitions was the best way he found of thinking through what was happening around him. And it was a distraction from thinking how he still liked Chiara and how Ethan sometimes seemed to like him and sometimes wanted him as far away as possible from his mother. Which the others said it was normal for a child his age since he was getting to the Oedipus complex.  

He was immersed in his thoughts when F.R.I.D.A.Y. called for him. – Mr. Barnes, you have a call request, shall I connect it to your mobile?

It took him by surprise, he usually never get calls and he could count with one hand the number of people who has his number or wanted to talk to him. – Sure. – He went to his phone and pressed the answer button to receive the call. – Hi, this is Bucky, who’s calling?

-          Hello, this Ethan.

-          Ethan? – Bucky was surprised to hear the little boy’s voice, he wasn’t sure he knew how to make a call. He tried to contain his panic keeping at by the thoughts of Chiara and Ethan having an accident or worst. - What are you doing? Does your mother know you’re calling me?

-          No, she sleep. – Ethan replied casually.

-          Are you in danger? – Since he was doing fine, then it had to be something else.

-          No. But mommy is sick.

-          Are you alone? – Bucky heard the boy saying yes and his mind started to race 100 mph with all of the things that could go wrong when you have a little kid home alone. - Do you want me to come and check on your mom?

-          Yes please.

-          Don’t move Ethan until I come and get you.

-          Okey! See ya! – The boy said casually not knowing the storm he created in Bucky.

Bucky just had time to put on a jacket and grab the keys of one of the many cars that Tony had in the garage. He was halfway to the car when he realized something: he had no idea where Chiara lived. A little ashamed of having overlooked such an important detail, he called for help. - Umph, F.R.I.D.A.Y. do you have Chiara’s address?

Of course the I.A. had the address. - I have sent it already to your mobile Mr. Barnes. I also must tell you that the key to her apartment is in the common room, it is perfectly labeled on the first drawer from the right.

-          Thank you, F.R.I.D.A.Y.

Bucky went back to retrieve the key which truly was perfectly labeled as “CHIARA”, went back to the garage and hurried to the apartment. He was preoccupied that something bad had happen to Chiara. He just knew she was sick and Ethan was home alone. A bunch of scenarios crossed his mind. But he gave himself some time to grab some medicines for her.  

With each passing light he grew anxious about the little boy being alone. Finally he arrived to the building marked on the GPS and hurried to number 3B. Even when he was extremely unsettled, his training as the Winter Soldier prevailed allowing him to open the door. At the sight of him, Ethan ran full throttle and threw his arms around his legs as a greeting.  

Bucky felt relief at once, he unruffled his hair and looked around. He then saw Chiara. The position in which she was sleeping surely would let her neck in pain when she wakes up. So he turned to Ethan and whispered. – Let’s take mom to bed, shall we? – And Bucky entered, closed the door and moved to carry her.

Ethan nodded enthusiastically and ran to show Bucky his mother’s room. Bucky couldn’t help noticing her beauty. He was mesmerized by her full lips and the rhythm of her breathing.  He put her to bed, took off her shoes and made sure she was comfortable before turning to deal with the little devil.

He closed the door and turned to Ethan. – Well, pal, now… what were you doing when you called? – Ethan showed him his coloring book but decided it was more important to show Bucky the apartment paying special attention to his room and his Iron Man toys. After the mini tour and having found another book that needed color, Bucky went to the kitchen to make some chicken soup and clean a little bit what he could find.

Chiara woke up when the sun was down in bed and was scared when she noticed the hour. She knew Ethan was alone. She felt ill still, weak but she had a responsibility with her son. So imagine her surprise when she went out and saw Ethan and Bucky having dinner and discussing school.

- Then what did the miss said when you took your crayons from the girl? – Bucky asked completely immerse in their conversation.

- She says… she says to share them, like with Benji… but it was my turn!

- Of course it was your turn!  She already had them for her flower.  

Listening to a contained giggle that became a cough Bucky looked up to find Chiara smiling. Despite having red puffy eyes because of the flu, he found her beautiful. In that precise moment he understood how smitten he was. He didn’t want to deny it anymore. Yet the excited squeal from Ethan brought him back to reality. Because Ethan was Chiara’s priority and he didn’t know if he fitted into that equation, not when sometimes Ethan behaved as if he wanted Bucky around and others like a rival who was trying to steal his mother from him.

- Mommy, Bucky came. – The little boy ran to the arms of his mother.

- Yes baby, I can see that… but why? – Chiara turned to see the beaming face of Bucky. He looked as handsome as ever and she… well, she had been sleeping all day due to the flu so probably not the prettiest sight right now.

- Oh, Ethan called me and said you were sick, so I came to watch over him.

- Thank you Bucky, but you shouldn’t have – She was ashamed that he had to come and a light pink tinted her cheeks. Then she found herself thinking about what he had just said – When you said “he called me”… what do you mean exactly? – remembering her phone was on her purse and that Ethan couldn’t have known Bucky’s number because not even Chiara had it.

- Well, F.R.I.D.A.Y. told me I had a call from Ethan. – Both adults were shocked when they realized the impossibilities regarding a call from Ethan.

- Ethan, how did you call Bucky? – Chiara asked and the boy ran to give her the toy phone he received from Tony. And of course, everything made sense in a minute. She would be mentioning it to Tony and Pepper in their next meeting.

As if in cue to break the tension from the moment, the TV announced Ethan’s favorite show and he squealed excitedly – “Watch Bucky”.  Ethan grabbed Bucky’s hand to take him to the sofa and sat next to him to watch Paw Patrol.

Of course Ethan pointed and explained the whole episode to Bucky, he was excited. Bucky noticed it, and he noticed how Chiara sat next to him and Ethan. He thought that he could get used to this: good days and bad days ending with a cartoon show. It was a bittersweet feeling, hope clouded by fear. He craved more and more for this dreamed life.

Unbeknown to him, Chiara craved for the same. Right now the illness was taking the best from her, but she was elated to have Bucky there, responding a call from her son. And Ethan was beyond himself. He liked the attention he got from both adults next to him, they were his favorite adults, and for a first night, the three of them were complete.

[kessielrg]

A Quiet Place

Summary: Inspired by a rp that @chibi-mushroom and @animacreates are doing with each other. I’ve lovingly dubbed it the ‘chaos rp’ because it’s kinda how it started out. And while the rp was also meant to be fandom specific, this little story was written to be mostly removed from that context. You might recognize some names though if you’ve been following me for awhile (or look at the tags). This story has a second part. You can read it: here.

Rating: K+

Word Count: 2,085 words

If you liked this story, please reblog.

. . .

Every kid had their challenges. It didn't matter if they were your blood or not, they just did. These two particular kids were warned as being extra challenging- with less than subtle wording indicating the girl in particular was the one who made things difficult. Oswald looked at the kid's photographs, then at their case worker, and said but one single word on the matter; “Good.”

In retrospect, though, he should have given Ortensia a greater warning on these two. She had always wanted children -even before they had gotten married-, and hearing that they were going to foster two kids nearly made her bounce off the walls. She didn't waste any time setting up two bedrooms with all sorts of little things she'd thought the kids would like. Proper things like soap and toiletries, and then general 'welcome to the family' gifts like toys and prepaid phones. When the kids actually got there, Oswald literally had to hold her by her shirt collar so she wouldn't hug them to death.

The boy, Blaine, seemed rather charmed by Ortensia at the get-go. He was the one who gave the proper introductions. The girl, Sabrina, held her suitcase with both hands and at her side like she planned on smacking someone with it. Her face holding a look of utter contempt that it nearly made her look older than she was. Oswald knew with all his heart that Ortensia meant well, but in her excitement, she quite easily forgot to notice the child's body cues. It didn't help in getting the girl to open up. If anything, Ortensia was making things worse.

He purposely let her forget to get groceries this morning. He knew he was going to need to separate her from the kids once she met them.

At least that meant their house tour was done in a slow, linear fashion instead of filled with several mildly irrelevant anecdotes. Never once did Sabrina let down her suitcase. She held it close to her like it was her only possession in the world. (And it very likely was. That was a thought that hurt old Oswald's heart in ways he couldn’t describe.) Blaine had been the one to gently suggest she leave it in her room. Even with her brother's approval, the child was still hesitant. She did end up sitting her stuff down eventually. Blaine was the one that suggested they go back out to the living room to wait for Ortensia to come back, and Oswald couldn't find a reason to disagree. He let the kids lead- it seemed only fair at this point.

“I want to apologize for how rude my sis is being.” Blaine said once everyone had found a place to sit. “Each family we go to, she seems to get more quiet and more scowl-y. If she didn't have such high opinions of certain people and things, then she'd almost take a vow of silence.”

That got some kind of reaction from the girl. She kicked him with the side of her foot; a motion that looked to have quite a bit of force to it, but Blaine didn't flinch. Oswald got a violent flashback to how he and his brother used to treat each other. He quickly shook his head. His brother had ruined more than one thing in his life before, and he wasn't going to take this either.

“It's alright.” he then said. “I can't imagine how stressful all the constant moving around must be for you guys. Once we get into a rhythm (and Ortensia calms down a bit) things should get easier. We won't force you two to do anything you're not comfortable with. I promise it.”

Both siblings looked like he had just punched them in the gut.

“Thanks...” Blaine stammered once he remembered his manners- his eyes averting from Oswald. Sabrina, too, curled a bit tighter inside herself. Their reactions were… odd, to say the least, but Oswald nearly feared questioning it. It's not like he could say he wouldn't force them into anything, then tell them to spill whatever was on their mind.

“I think I'll be fine.” Blaine then said. He tried to sit up proper again, to be an authoritative figure between the two kids. “It's Sabi that's the tough nut to crack. Too much activity and she retreats to her own little hideaway- wherever it tends to be that day.”

“I get that.” Oswald agreed with a nod; perfectly ignoring the stink eye Sabrina was giving Blaine. “I built that little extension above the garage just so I could be alone.” Oswald blinked when a thought came to him. “I have an idea.” he then offered. “Sabrina, how about you follow me for a second. We can come right back after.”

Sabrina gave Blaine a wary look, but at her brother's firm nod, she relented. Oswald offered her a half grin in response before he got up. He gestured for her to follow. He didn't look back- trusting that she would be behind. She did follow. Perhaps by a good foot or two, but she followed him. (Her brother was following as well, by the way. Just out of eye range, but close enough so she could still feel his presence.) Oswald led them through the house and over to the garage. There was a staircase that went up to a second floor, Oswald opened it to enter the room. He left it open to allow Sabrina time to come in if she wanted to. (At this point, Blaine was at the bottom of the stairs, also waiting to see what she would do.) She took a breath in, and followed Oswald inside.

The child was greeted to a room that was a mix of a living room and a workshop. The generously sized area had a CRT TV against a wall, with a dark blue velvet couch in front. Against another wall was a large desk- there was something that looked like a small coo-coo clock on it, next to a decent sized container of tools. On the wall next to that was a well abused recliner, a bookcase filled with books of various sizes, and even a box that looked to have nothing but broken junk in it.

“I suggest making yourself comfortable on the big sofa.” Oswald offered, gesturing to the dark blue couch. “It’s got plenty of room to stretch out. You can even put on a movie too if you feel like.”

Sabrina still hung by the door. Her body was scrunched as if she could disappear just by looking as small as possible. Oswald didn't force her any further into the room. If anything, he went over to the desk to check on the dissected clock than paid any real attention to her. She was waiting. She was waiting for the moment when he forced her to do something- anything. After five minutes, it didn't happen. Giving the room a rather disgusted glance, Sabrina slowly started to move her body to the couch. She flinched when the couch squeaked slightly at her sitting down. She flinched again when Oswald started to talk, thinking she was in trouble.

“Once Ortensia realizes that we’re here, she won’t come bother us. I made it a rule.”

The child's face scrunched as she looked over at him. She really wanted to ask why, but she didn’t want him to think she was opening up. Instead, she pressed herself against a corner of the couch and said nothing. Oswald still wasn't paying attention to her, still talking more to himself than anyone else.

“Ortensia means well, she's just not aware of her own strength- so to speak. I don't blame you for turning down every hug she tries to give.” He gave a small chortle before adding, “There are days when I don't want her to hug me. And we've known each since middle school.”

This was when Oswald finally looked back at Sabrina. Words couldn't even begin to describe how relieved he was that she was still in the room- let alone sitting down. His hand absently went over the thick afghan blanket that he had draped over his desk chair. It had been a wedding gift that was passed down from generation to generation. The blanket was knit together in a ripple pattern using light blue, dark blue, and faded pink lamb's wool. One of Oswald's fingers traced over the knit before he had an idea.

“Here.” Oswald said as he tossed the blanket her way. “You hide under this, then I'll pretend you're not there. I can do my thing, and you can do yours. I won't talk to ya unless you want to.”

The girl just stared at him before covering herself up with the blanket. At first, she was less than amused that the heavy blanket nearly smacked her when he had tossed it. She took it with two fingers as she looked it over. Noting that it was a little worn, but cleaned, Sabrina carefully placed it over her shoulders. She wrapped herself up snugly, covering even her head, and laid down on the couch curled into a ball like she was nothing no more than a lumpy bolster pillow. Oswald smirked a bit. But he knew he wasn't going to say anything about it. This kid had to move on her own time- that was a lesson he knew well.

He hated to admit it; but he saw a lot of himself in her.

“You have any music preferences, kid?” he asked as he went over to where he kept his portable phonograph. An original Edison, crank and all. Took him the greater part of a summer to get it back together again.

“I don't exist.”

Oswald blinked before realizing what she meant. “Oh. Right, right.” he agreed. “Sorry about that. Lemme just put on something then...”

He thoughtfully hummed as he went through his record collection. When he found a good one, Oswald let out a sound of happy discovery. He pulled out a record from its sleeve, flipped it in his hands before blowing on it a bit, then placed the record on the turntable. From her spot on the couch, it was a bit hard to watch him crank the player up and move the needle over to the record. There was no way Sabrina was moving from her spot, though- she was way too comfortable now. When the player gave way to static, Oswald was satisfied enough to go to his desk. He started work on his project as a jazzy song started to say.

“Listen while I tell you about a gal named Daisy Mae. They called her 'Lazy Daisy Mae.' Her reputation I'm afraid is all that people say. Midnight begins her working day. She had a man that was tall and handsome; large and strong. She used to sing this song;”

“Hey daddy!” Oswald sang along in baritone. “I want a diamond ring- bracelets, everything. Daddy, you outta get the best for meeee…!”

Sabrina tried to watch him with a critical eye, but it was rather hard when he kept half humming, half singing along to the song. He really was going to act like she wasn't there, huh? Which was all fine and dandy- she had no interest in whatever he was fixing up. The only sound in the room besides the record player was him shuffling his tools around for another. She didn't like how relaxing it was. This was always the part where someone came through the door, demanding attention to something else in the scariest voice possible. But it didn't happen. She knew that no one was going to interrupt them. This weird fella and his wife? They were genuine.

So far.

They were genuine, so far.

That 'so far' was incredibly important, you know. Just as scary; if not more so.

She didn't want her eyes to close. She didn't want to be relaxed. She wanted to resist the urge to go to sleep here. It wasn't working. But constantly being on guard for something bad to happen was exhausting. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to get a little sleep. Besides, to Oswald, she didn't exist. He was the only other person in the room with her, and he surely wasn't going to stop whatever he was doing just to make small talk with her. After letting out a small sigh, Sabrina went into a dreamless sleep in seconds.

[a-milky-strawberry]

Chanyeol x Reader - Happy Virus (Angst/Fluff)

You didn’t have the… most amazing childhood. Your childhood wasn’t terrible, at least for the most part. The first ten years of your life were amazing. You had a loving mother, a caring father, two wonderful brothers, and an overwhelmingly big family. You came from a close-knit family. There were no secrets, no rumors. Everyone knew everything about family and our friends. However, there are reasons for why you used the term “had” when it came to telling anyone regarding your family. That includes your ‘Happy Virus’ boyfriend, Park Chan Yeol.

When you first met Chanyeol you fell head first in love. No, seriously, as he was walking by you got so distracted by his handsome face that you fell head first into a pond. Chanyeol was nice enough to give you his jacket for warmth while you dried your clothes. After that encounter, you two just seemed to have a lot in common and he still tells that story to anyone within earshot. You two shared everything together.

Well, not everything.

Chanyeol knew a lot about you. He knew your favorite color, ice cream flavors, types of music. He knew all your friends and even your favorite animals (spoiler alert: it’s all of them), tv shows, favorite serial killers, etc. He knew everything. At least he thought he did. Chanyeol didn’t know a single thing about your family. When he thought about it he never met you mom or your dad or even a single cousin. At first, he didn’t think much about it. He was an idol after all. You were probably protecting him from loose lip family members, he thought. But, that never stopped him from being suspicious about your behavior when he brought it.

He would always talk about his family. He’d go on and on about stories from his childhood, stories about his mother, and funny anecdotes about his father. You never got tired of hearing his stories. A bright smile would be plastered on your face the whole time. However, whenever your family was brought up your face would change. It seemed almost stoic with a mix of sadness and anger. Your body language would be closed off and you talked as if you were a bad actor regurgitating a line.

“My childhood was good. Mom, dad, two brothers, y’know. Kind of a big family, I guess. They live far away so I haven’t seen them much since moving here. Do you want to make out?”

That was just one of the many ways you’d get him to lose interest in the topic: food, making out, night markets, arcades, and so on. It worked, but the thought never left his mind.

---------

Chanyeol was exhausted. These seemed to be one of those days where schedules seemed to happen back to back to back. He wanted nothing more than to cuddle you and order takeout. After his final schedule, he hurried straight over to your apartment. He sent you texts stating that he was coming over and you couldn’t be happier. You two couldn’t help it. The both of you were just that cheesy. Not seeing each other for a few hours turns into some type of Rose and Jack scene.

As Chanyeol walked up to your apartment building entrance, he noticed a middle-aged woman looking more than a little lost. She had a small piece of paper in her left hand and a bag in her right. She looked sweaty and exhausted and her shoes looked run down. It was as if she had been walking all day.

“Um… is this it? Oh… why did my phone have to die? I have no idea where I am…”

The woman kept looking at a small piece of paper and your apartment building. Was she looking for someone?

“Um… excuse me ma’am? Are you lost?”

The woman looked up at Chanyeol startled but soon was relieved as she took a big sigh.

“Yes! I’ve been looking around all day for this apartment and I don’t remember the apartment I’m supposed to go to. It’s on my phone but my battery died 2 hours ago! Can you please help me?!” the woman pleaded. She looked pretty desperate and the last thing Chanyeol wanted to do was leave a woman outside this late at night without any forms of communication.

“Sure!” Chanyeol smiled. “I’d be happy to help.”

The woman returned the smile. “Thank you! So much! Such a nice, handsome man.”

Chanyeol let out a chuckle. He was always a hit with older women and grandmothers. You’d often tease him saying that he should be a sugar baby to a grandmother if he didn’t want to be an idol anymore.

Chanyeol took the woman’s piece of paper and quirked his eyebrow. ‘No wonder she couldn’t find this place! This address is smudged and you can barely see the apartment number.’ He looked back up at the woman. “Um… Is there anyone in particular you’re visiting? My girlfriend lives here so they might be looking for the person.” Chanyeol asked already to pull out his phone to text you.

The woman nodded. “Of course. I’m looking for a (Y/N) (L/N). Do you happen to know them?”

Chanyeol almost dropped his phone. Why… would this woman be looking for you? Is she a relative? A friend?

“Uh… yeah, I do. Are you a family friend or something?”

The woman chuckled, but her eyes seemed to dart away at the question. “I��m her aunt.”

As much as Chanyeol didn’t want to seem shocked he couldn’t help but choke on his own spit. Here was your blood relative standing right in front of him. His eyes widened. Didn’t you say that your family lived really, really far away? Well, that would explain how she got lost and the smudged address. But, why didn’t you tell him your aunt was visiting? Better yet, why hadn’t you told him sooner.

“Umm… are you alright?”

The woman brought Chanyeol out of his thoughts and he realized he had been staring.

“Oh, yeah! Ahem! I’m fine! I know them. I can take you right now.”

The woman beamed with happiness. “Oh! Thank you so much!”

Chanyeol led the woman inside the building. They got in the elevator and he pressed your floor number. As the elevator shook with movement, Chanyeol took peaks at your aunt. She looked fairly young but had lines on her face to give out her age. She seemed nervous and fidgeting. Was this woman really your aunt?

“So, uh, are you from out of town? Because of the address and directions?”

Your “aunt” nodded. “Yes. We haven’t seen much of each other since they moved away. In all honesty, I haven’t seen them in decades.”

Chanyeol nodded. That seemed to line up. You had told him that it had been years since you’ve seen anyone from your family that wasn’t your two brothers.

“I bet they’ll be happy to see you. But, why didn’t you ask them to pick you up or give you directions?”

“Oh, um… I wanted it to be a surprise.” she said curtly. Chanyeol nodded and left the conversation alone, getting the feeling that she didn’t want to talk anymore. However, it did explain why you didn’t tell him they were coming. Once the elevator reached your floor, the doors opened and Chanyeol led the “aunt” down a long hallway. Once they reached the door, your “aunt” seemed visibly nervous now.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Your “aunt” swallowed harshly. “I-I’m just a little jittery… I wonder how they’re going to react…”

Chanyeol put on a brave face. “Well, no time like the present!” He knocked on your door with a familiar rhythm.

“Come in!” he heard you yell.

Chanyeol opened the door and the smell of Chinese takeout made him drool. He always looked forward to the scary movie nights and takeout. Apparently, you were in the mood for Chinese as he saw piles of it on your coffee table as he guided the woman into the living room. You were on your knees, digging your big box of movies searching for something to watch. You were one of the only people he knew who still had a DVD player.

“Great timing! I was having a hard time choosing between Us and Ma-AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!” You let out a gut-wrenching scream as you laid eyes on your boyfriend… standing right next to your aunt. The air immediately turned tense and cold and Chanyeol could feel a chill rip through his spine. He has never ever heard you scream like that. In all of the scary movie nights and spiders and roaches, that scream you let out gave him goosebumps. As your aunt took a step forward, you fell on your butt trying to scramble away from her. The fear in your eyes was uncanny.

“H-Hi (Y/N)... Look, I don’t want to make trouble but I came here be-” Your aunt was cut short as a vase whipped centimeters away from her head. The ceramic shattered everywhere and Chanyeol didn’t have time to respond as a clay dish also whipped towards you aunt just barely missing her face.

“GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!” you screamed, already arming yourself with another vase and clay dish.

“Please sweetheart! Just listen-!”

Another vase whipped at her.

“DON’T YOU DARE CALL ME ‘SWEETHEART’ AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO MY FAMILY!!”

‘What you did to my family!!’ What did your aunt do?! There was no time for questions as an ashtray you used to hold your jewelry broke on your aunt’s face. Your aunt dropped to the floor as she cradled her face and yelped in pain. The sounds of your panting were the only thing filling the silence in your apartment. Chanyeol just looked on in horror. He didn’t know what to do. Did he check to see if your aunt was okay or did he go and comfort you? His hands were shaking and he could barely breathe. Just what the hell was going on here?!

“I… I deserved that…” your aunt whispered as she wobbled trying to get on her feet.

“You deserved to have your skin peeled off with a rusty, ancient potato peeler and have all of your orifices sewn with piano wire while a mix of salt and lime juice embalms your entire body.” you snarled. Another chill rips through Chanyeol’s spine. Your voice laced with pure hatred and he has never seen you this angry. It was like you were a whole different person.

“Please… 귀여운… please just listen… I didn’t come here to fight you. I came here… to ask for your forgiveness…”

You scoffed. “Forgiveness? Forgiveness?! After everything you’ve done?! And you dragged my boyfriend in the middle of all of this!!” you pointed at Chanyeol who stood like a statue.

“I didn’t mean to! He said he knew you… and I came all this way… just to find you…”

“Well, you wasted your time! Because I don’t want to see you! Not only did you ruin my life, you ruined everyone’s life! The family, the relationship between me and my dad, and your own sister!! My mother!! She-!” Your words caught in your throat as tears streamed down your face. “I’m not discussing this in front of Chanyeol… Go home (Y/A/N)...”

“Please 귀여운!! I came all this way! I looked for you all day! I came here to give you news about your dad! And I really wanted to see you…”

You stood quiet as she went on. “No one has seen you in years… You’re the only one who doesn’t keep in contact with the family. Your brothers still keep in touch-”

“That was their choice. The moment I left was when I decided I had no family.”

“(Y/N) please…”

“You and that bastard are nothing to me. That whole family is nothing to me! That whole family knew what was going on but were too fucking cowards to have the decency to tell my mother what was going on!!”

“(Y/N)... there’s still so much that you don’t know… If you had stayed and hadn’t pushed us away you would know the full story.”

“LISTEN TO WHAT?! The excuses?! The tears?! The cries?! What “story” is there to tell?! The story about how you're selfish?! And spoiled?! And how you couldn’t just let my mother be happy even if you weren’t?! So you played with my father the same way a child plays with their other siblings' toys when that sibling gets news ones?!”

Your aunt turned silent as she looked down at the ground. Tears were flowing through her eyes too.

“Or are you going to tell him how you two were so in love that you couldn’t recognize what was wrong? Forgiveness is the last thing I want from you. I don’t want your forgiveness. I don’t want your hugs, no sweethearts, not even a damn handshake from you. Because of you… my mother is dead.”

The air dropped 20 degrees lower and Chanyeol could hear you choking back painful sobs.

“Killed by your selfishness… Can your forgiveness bring my mother back? Can your forgiveness bring back all the heartache and crying and trauma that I had to go through finding her body that morning? Can your forgiveness bring back all the years I slept on the streets, begging and crying in the alley alone, when I ran away from home because you and that bastard immediately put me and my brothers in boarding schools after my mother’s funeral?”

Your aunt said nothing more. You blinked the tears out of your eyes and turned around. “I would like for you to leave my house.”

“(Y/N)-”

“I’m afraid I don’t know you ma’am. Please leave my home before my boyfriend calls the police.”

You aunt looked over Chanyeol as they made eye contact. Her eyes were red and her face wet with tears. She gave him a sorrowful look as if to say she was sorry for having to witness this distratious reunion. She slowly picked herself up and placed her bag on the coffee table. She looked at Chanyeol once more and then the bag. Her eyes told him that whatever was in that bag was why she made the journey all the way here and was leaving with a gash in her cheek. As your aunt made her way to the door, you spoke up again.

“(Y/A/N)?”

She turned her head and looked at the corridor that led to your living room. You were standing between that entrance with a cold, tearful look.

“I don’t know how you got here. I’m 10000000% certain that it was none of my brothers, but I will tell you this. If you tell that bastard where I live or anyone else for that matter or get anyone else to come here, I’ll call my brothers and tell them what happened. They’ll cut you off with no hesitation… and then, you’ll be left with no one.”

A painful sob left your aunt’s throat as she nodded and scrambled to get the door open.

“귀여운… my sweetheart… I am so so sorry…”

The door softly shut and you aunt was gone. You slowly walked towards the door, locked it and pressed your forehead on the cold door.

Chanyeol had finally gotten up and was staring at your back, a few tears in his eye as well. He approached you slowly as not to stress you out.

“(Y/N)...?” he whispered. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” you stated curtly. Oh, but you were far from okay. As much as you were angry and upset, you were more so embarrassed that this happened in front of Chanyeol, the love of your life. You wanted to have a relationship with this man. He was one of the few that you actually trusted, just not to the degree. You always knew you’d have to tell him one way or another. Just not like this… How were you going to be normal knowing that Chanyeol knows everything. He’s not an idiot. All the clues were there and based on your reaction he knew this was serious shit he just witnessed.

“I’m sorry-”

“Can I give you a hug?” he asked gently. You turned around and were faced with your gentle faced boyfriend with his arms out already out. You looked in his eyes. They were shiny from tears and you knew rejecting his hug would only make him feel worse. You didn’t give an answer as you willfully ran into his arms and sobbed into his chest. Chanyeol patted your back and smooth your hair, shushing you and whispering gentle words like: “You’re okay. Everything’s okay.” “You’re safe now.” “Whenever you’re ready.” After a while your sobs turned into small sniffles.

“I-I’m so s-sorry you had to see that… I w-w-was gonna tell you s-s-s-soon b-b-b-but…” you stuttered trying to get your words in order.

“Shh… it’s okay… Take a deep breath…”

“I-I was so s-scared that you would leave me!!!”

Chanyeol felt his stomach drop. He would never leave you. Especially since he’s gotten a snippet of what you’ve got through.

“I would never leave you Jagiya…” he assured, giving you a tight squeeze. “We’re in this together now, araso? Your worries are now my worries. When you want to talk about it and explain your story I will always be here to lend you my Yoda ears.”

You let out a soft giggle.

“My ears can pick up anything. I can even hear your thoughts! You’re thinking: ‘How did I get so lucky with such a handsome, generous, man with a ten-pack and great hair.’

You laughed as you pulled away and looked into his eyes. “Close. More along the lines of ‘dorky’ and ‘nine-pack’.”

Chanyeol let out a dramatic gasp and threw his head back. “Are you saying my abs are uneven?! I’ll have you know I count my abs everyday in the shower, just like I count my bread!”

“Pfft-! You count your bread?! Who the hell does that?!”

“Um! Every good-looking rapper with a ten-pack, great hair, handsome face, and who’s Jagiya keeps making peanut butter jelly and honey sandwiches at 3 a.m.”

“Oh my gosh! You’re such a weirdo!” you laughed, holding your stomach with now a new set of tears running down your face. A happy set of tears. As your laughter died down you took Chanyeol’s hand and gave him a gentle almost pleading look.

“Promise you’ll wait?” you asked.

He smiled gently and stroked your cheek. “I’ll wait forever if that means I get to see you smiling everyday.”

You leaned into his cheek and smiled. “Thank you.” You gave his palm a kiss and led him into the living room. You noticed the bag on the coffee table. “What’s this?”

“I don’t know. Your aunt had it with her. It seemed like she wanted you to open it.”

You stared at the bag not knowing what to do. A million thoughts rushed through your mind before Chanyeol’s voice snapped you out of thought.

“Do you want to throw it away?” he asked gently. “Her being here made you really upset and I wouldn’t want you to open the bag if you don’t want to.”

You thought for a while before sighing. “Can you… put it in my closet? I’ll open it someday. Just not to today.”

Chanyeol gave a quick ‘of course’ before giving you a peck on the head and putting the bag in your closet. You’d definitely want to be in the right mindset before seeing what was in that bag. Chanyeol came back and saw you looking at the piles of Chinese food and giving a big sigh. “Well, this food is definitely cold now. Plus, there's glass everywhere…” you grumbled looking at the shattered pieces of once was a vase, two clay dishes, and an ashtray.

“Let’s heat these up and clean up this mess. Then we can start our scary movie night. I still need you to help me pick between Us and Ma.”

“Of course Yeobo! But first, you need to work on your target practice because you missed.”

You tilted your head in confusion. “Missed what?”

Chanyeol pointed to his lips with an adorable pout. “My lips aren’t on my palm~! You really need to work on your aim.”

You giggled as you stood on your tip toes and gave him a quick kiss.

“And just a few more.” he said before smothering your entire face in kisses. Your laughter filled the apartment once again as you both fell on the couch in a kissing frenzy.

“W-Wait! Chanyeol!”

“Not so fast! You need to pay your fees!”

“What fees?”

“What if I get glass in my foot? And what if I bite into a cold noodle because of the microwave? You need to pay for all precautions!”

“Chanyeol!!”

This was why you love this man. He could turn your pain and sobs into laughter. He could make a bad day seem like nothing more than a grain of sand in the ocean. He always made you feel loved and happy. I guess that’s why he isn’t nicknamed the ‘Happy Virus’ for nothing.

hey guys. sorry i haven’t been active recently. college has been kicking my ass even though WE HAVE REMOTE CLASSES >:( anyway. i’ll try to update as much as i can and for those wondering if i’m going to be continuing the suga x reader - cold series, i am! also, look out for some reactions coming soon! later!

[datheetjoella]

Fantober 2020, Day 28: Pirates

Author: DatHeetJoella Fandom: Free! Pairing: MakoHaru Rating: T Part: 28/31 (read the full collection here) Word count: 2,107 Tags: Canonverse, Established Relationship, Fluff, Video Chat, Tachibana Twins Read at: AO3, FFn, or right here!

                                          --------------------------------------

Seated at the kotatsu with his back against the bed, Makoto clicked and scrolled through various articles. He had to write an essay about a common injury in athletes, how to prevent it and possible remedies. The choice for rotator cuff injuries had been a simple one: Sousuke had first-hand experience with recovering from a pretty severe case with surgery and therapy and Makoto could gather some useful knowledge through him.

When Makoto sent him a message this morning to ask if he would be willing to share his experience in detail, Sousuke had agreed and they talked on the phone for about an hour after class. Although this essay wasn't due for another week and a half, he wanted to get started right away, now the conversation with Sousuke was still fresh in his mind. Of course, he took a bunch of notes while Sousuke explained the medical process he went through and the physical therapy he had once a week, but it was better to get started while he was ahead.

So after dinner, he brewed a nice cup of tea, burrowed himself under the kotatsu and got to work. Sousuke's anecdotes were extremely helpful, but he couldn't write an essay based on his personal experience solely, so he surfed from one medical journal to the next in search of more information.

But when he opened his document to start typing, a call button popped up on the screen. One glance at the clock made him smile. It was seven-fifty, ten minutes before the agreed-upon time. Ran and Ren were eager as always.

He accepted the call and was greeted by a pair of excited grins.

"Onii-chan!"

"Where's Haru-chan?"

Makoto chuckled. Hello to them, too. "Haru's taking a bath right now."

"Aw, I wanted to see him too!"

"Can't you ask if he'll come out of the bath?" Ran asked with a pout that matched her twin's.

"He had a long day. Coach Tsukamoto really pushed him to his limit," Makoto said, "Maybe he'll come to say hi later, but for now we should let him relax, alright?"

"Alright," they said in unison.

"So, what did you do today? Did you learn a lot at school?"

The disheartened looks on their faces were wiped away instantly. "We went to Mami-chan's place after school," Ran said, "It was her birthday the other day and she got this movie as a present, so we watched it together."

The question about school was completely ignored and Makoto giggled on the inside. "Really? What kind of movie?"

"It was about pirates!" Ren said, "They were so cool and they had big swords and they went like woosh and slash." He waved an imaginary sword around, adding sound effects at every strike.

"And at the end, they finally found the island where the treasure was buried, but then there was this other group of pirates, the one they fought before, and the captains had to duel for the gold," Ran explained. "But the evil pirate captain cheated and had one of his crewmates attack the good captain from behind. But the good captain was so skilled at fighting that he dodged the attack and won from them both!"

"And then he gave everyone a share of the gold and when he was back home, he used his gold to buy medicine for his sick auntie."

Makoto was pretty sure he wasn't familiar with this movie, but now he didn't have to waste time watching it either. Trust the twins to spoil everything in their enthusiasm. "It's a relief he won, then."

"Yeah, because the evil captain was going to gamble with it and he always cheats so that's unfair," Ran concluded with a nod.

"That is pretty unfair."

"What's unfair?" Haruka asked as he kicked the bathroom door shut with his foot, a fluffy towel slung around his neck. He swooped down and pressed a kiss to Makoto's head. When the speakers of Makoto's laptop burst with giggles, Haruka whipped his head around. "Oh, hi. You guys are early."

"They had something really important to tell me," Makoto said with a smile as Haruka snuggled himself beside him underneath the kotatsu.

"Yeah!" the twins said and gave Haruka a rundown of everything they just told Makoto, with some extra details to spoil the movie even more, of course.

"Sounds like you had a lot of fun today," Haruka said when they finished their incohesive plot summary.

"We did," Ran said, "And when the movie was over, we wanted to play pirates with Mami-chan, but we couldn't decide who would be the captain."

"We all wanted to be the captain," Ren concurred.

"Why didn't you all be captains then?" Makoto asked and he was instantly met with incredulous frowns.

"You can't have three captains on one ship!" Ren said.

"Yeah! There can only be one captain, or else it's not the captain."

"Yeah, Makoto," Haruka said teasingly, earning himself a nudge from Makoto's elbow.

"Okay, I get it, one captain," Makoto said, "What did you do to solve the issue then?"

"Nothing. Mom came to get us before we got the chance to listen to each person's reason," Ran said. "So when we got home, we wanted to play with just the two of us, but we still couldn't decide. But clearly, I'm the best captain."

"That's not true, I'm the best captain."

"How could you be the best captain?" she asked, "You're always late for everything. By the time you find out where the treasure is, another group of pirates has already got it so there won't be any gold left for you or your crew."

"Well, you wouldn't be a good captain either because," Ren said, pausing briefly to think of an adequate reason. "Because I wouldn't listen to you. How can you be a captain when your crew doesn't even listen to you?"

"The rest of the crew would listen to me," Ran claimed, "Only you wouldn't because you would be jealous that you're not the captain yourself!"

Completely forgetting they had a live connection to Tokyo, Ran and Ren resumed their squabble from this afternoon as though it never ended. Seemed like their mom went to get them right in time, before it got out of hand and they damaged their friendship with Mami-chan beyond repair.

"Guys, stop it," Makoto demanded in that brotherly-tone he hadn't used in months. "This is nothing worth fighting about."

"No mutiny on this ship," Haruka said, trying to bite back a grin.

"Why don't you choose which of us is the best captain then?" Ran said and Ren voiced his agreement.

"You both have your own qualities that would make you a good captain," Makoto said, "Ran, you're a real go-getter so you'd sail straight towards your goal, no distractions, while Ren, you're very understanding so I'm sure your crewmates would feel safe with you as their captain."

Ren sighed and deflated on the table. "Of course you would say that, Onii-chan."

"So wishy-washy," Ran said with a disapproving shake of her head.

"What? It's true!" Makoto defended. How could he ever pick one of them above the other?

"Haru-chan, you decide," Ren said, knowing that unlike his brother, Haruka didn't sugarcoat his opinion.

"Hmm," Haruka said as he thought about it. "I pick Makoto as the captain."

"Onii-chan?"

"Me?"

"Yes. He's the oldest."

"I'm not, you are," Makoto said.

"Who says I'm playing along?" Haruka said, but before the twins had the chance to groan and protest, he smiled. "I meant between the three of you. Makoto is the oldest so it makes sense that he would inherit the ship. Besides, he already knows what it's like to be a captain anyway."

"He does?"

"How so?"

"He was the captain of our swim team in high school, remember?" Haruka said as he grabbed Makoto's teacup and took a sip.

Makoto frowned. "I was, but that's not the same as being a pirate captain."

"Yeah, being a pirate captain is different," Ren said.

"Why is it different?" Haruka asked. "He was in charge of us, his crewmates, and gave us specific instructions on what to do. He made decisions along with our manager and the teacher, his advisors, and he took us to several different venues, like islands across the seven seas. And most importantly, he led us to gold on numerous occasions."

Ran scratched her chin. "You do have a point."

"Maybe Onii-chan would be a good captain."

"He already is. He's a great leader and makes sure everyone in his crew feels comfortable in their job and outside of it. He can be a bit indecisive at times, but when it truly matters, he always does the right thing."

"In that case, you would be an amazing captain too, Haru," Makoto said, "You're strong, even in the face of adversity and although you don't show it as obviously, you're so caring and considerate. You're always looking out for everyone and you whatever you can for your friends."

Haruka's cheeks lit up and he looked down to fumble with the hem of the futon. "Too much trouble."

"What about me?" Ran said.

"And me?"

Makoto smiled. "You two would be amazing captains too. And I know you think otherwise, but I don't see why a ship can't have two captains. You're twins, so I can't imagine two people more fit to work together like that than you. You can take turns as the head captain who gives orders to your crew members, and when true danger lurks, you can fight it off and protect your ship as a duo."

"But when you're playing with Mami-chan or your other friends, be sure to give them a turn as captains too, otherwise it's not fair," Haruka said and for impact he added, "Then you would be just like that evil captain."

That startled them. Although ideally, they would prefer being the sole captain on their ship, they aspired to be brave and righteous ones, not the tyrannic and wicked type.

"Alright, we'll take turns," Ran relented.

"That would be the fair thing to do," Makoto said with an endorsing nod of his head, "You can use rock-paper-scissors to decide who gets to go first. Then the winner is the captain for the day and the rest of you get a chance the next time."

That wasn't a bad solution and Ren said, "You really are a good captain, Onii-chan."

"Thanks," Makoto said, smiling fondly at his little siblings. "Now that issue is solved, did you do anything else recently?"

They chatted about the eventful and uneventful things that occurred in Ran and Ren's lives since the last time they caught up, but the twins remembered to ask them about their days as well. Knowing they were much better at talking than listening, Haruka and Makoto made sure to keep their answers short.

When their mom came to greet them and tell Ran and Ren it was bedtime, they said their goodbyes. The majority of the conversation hadn't been what he expected it to be, but Makoto basked in every minute he got to spend with his siblings nevertheless. He missed them and their endless enthusiasm a lot and hearing them ramble on about the tiniest, most trivial things with such fervour in their voices made his heart melt with fondness.

"You never know what you're going to talk about next with the twins, huh?" Makoto chuckled at the thought of oversized pirate hats on their small heads, boots that were too tall for their legs, eye patches and plastic cutlasses that couldn't even slice butter. "At least now I know what to get them for their birthday."

"Don't bother," Haruka said, "Now it's pirates, next week they watch a movie about superheroes and then that's their new obsession."

"I can't argue with that," Makoto said, and then he looked down at his lap. "Did you really mean it?"

"Mean what?"

"When you said I was a great leader?"

Haruka scoffed and his cheeks regained their cherry blossom-tinge. "I wouldn't have said so if I didn't," he grumbled and he shot up. "I'm going to get some tea. Do you want a refill of that?" He gestured towards Makoto's cup.

"Arr," Makoto said, unable to hide a grin as Haruka snatched it from the table and went over to the kitchen. "Oh, and could you bring the cookie tin?"

"Aye aye, Captain."

With a smile, Makoto watched Haruka's retreating back, his chest spilling over with affection. Pirate captain or not, it didn't matter, because Makoto had already found the greatest treasure on earth.