#I just wanted to be able to watch it on my tv instead of pirating and watching on my laptop but jfc this is so much harder

[cursethememory]

Fbdodndosbdodd why do streaming services make it so insanely awful to try to sign in on a device? My parents get hbo max as part of their cable package so I’m trying to sign in on my ps5. So I had to do their provider log in which requires scanning the code on my phone, signing into their cable account (including getting a code that was texted to my mom), then being told that if I don’t have the voice remote, I need to sign in with the max log in. So I go to do that, which tells me to use the code and follow the link on my computer to get to the sign in screen. I sign in and it says to continue streaming I need to reset the password. So now I need to log into my dads email, get the password reset link, and change his password. Like just fucking kill me

[tdoong15]

I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED AN ASK I'M SO SO SO SORRY. BASICALLY I SAVED WHAT I WAS DOING TO MY DRAFTS SO IF MY PHONE GLITCHED (SINCE IT DOES IT A LOT) I STILL HAD IT I THEN WENT TO CONTINUE WRITING BUT I DELETED EVERYTHING INSTEAD.

Anyway I'll try to remember as much as I can.

Little!SMC Kid!Nayeon Cg!Jeonghyo

Warnings: yelling, crying(?)

Ipad kid

Nayeon woke up and she felt mentally younger than normal and whenever she was like that she wanted nothing more than to simply watch videos on the TV or her IPad which she kept at the side of her bed. But she also knew that she had to do her morning routine before she was even allowed to even have access to her IPad or the TV because if she had them immediately she would be too distracted and not get anything done.

The bunny left her room and walked to the kitchen to have her breakfast, it was the most important meal of the day after all. When she reached the kitchen she saw her mom and mama preparing breakfast for everyone. "Good mornin' mom and mama" Nayeon waves at them, her voice was loud but a slight tiredness seeped through since she had only just woken up. "Oh good morning Nay" Jeongyeon says when she heard Nayeon's voice, she then passes Nayeon her drink and carries her plate to the table.

Nayeon rushes to the table and quickly eats her Lucky Charms and drinks her juice because she was very eager to go on her IPad and to have some well deserved quality time to herself despite her not doing anything significant. Once she finished her breakfast she ran to her room and grabbed her IPad, then back to the living room where she dived on the couch, occupying all of it since she layed down on it, Nayeon also turned on the TV and put on the new Trolls movie for some noise in the background.

In the hallway, Dahyun, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu were playing a game based on the show called 'Jake and the Neverland Pirates' because they all seemed to enjoy the adventure that the show obviously has. Dahyun decided she was Jake since she was the oldest out of the trio, she also made Chaeyoung be Cubby because she was the shortest and Tzuyu was Izzy out of the process of elimination according to Dahyun anyway.

"Guys wook, it's Captain Hook!" Tzuyu pointed to Nayeon who was peacefully playing on her IPad. Dahyun audibly and loudly gasps for dramatic effect "We need to defeat the bad guy so we can get our tweasure" She declares, and lifts her foam sword, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu copy her action. "Okay on the count of thwee" Dahyun whispers but Chaeyoung was already running to where Nayeon was. "CHAWGE!!!!" Chaeyoung yells, Dahyun and Tzuyu were closely behind Chaeyoung before they hit Nayeon repeatedly with their foam swords.

Nayeon tried to use her hands to block the attacks until she got really annoyed and started screaming "STOP! I DON'T WANT TO PLAY YOUR SILLY AND DUMB BABY GAME!" Nayeon then grabbed the swords and broke them. Dahyun, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu looked in shock for a few seconds then they started crying loudly and running off to Jihyo and Jeongyeon. Nayeon on the other hand grumbled to herself and she went back to playing on her IPad but she had a frown on her face when she played.

Jihyo and Jeongyeon were in Jihyo's room casually talking about videos they've seen on Instagram until the door burst open and the three youngest were sobbing while they ran onto the bed in their pirate costumes. "What's wrong sweeties?" Jihyo's voice was filled with worry and concern because it wasn't everyday that she had to deal with all three of SMC bawling their eyes out. After a few minutes Chaeyoung was able to choke out some sort of a sentence "N-Nayeonie mean. She bwoke our swords and said she wouldn't play with us." Jeongyeon and Jihyo both let out a sigh out of relief that it wasn't something really serious but it was out of disappointment because of what Nayeon did.

"Hey it's okay, I'll go talk to Nay now about her behavior" Jeongyeon says softly whilst she stands up from the bed and walks to the living room, leaving Jihyo to calm down the maknae line, which was surprisingly easy because they all fell asleep after they tired themselves out due to their massive crying session.

Jeongyeon walked into the living room and spots Nayeon pouting as she played her game called Project Sekai. "Nayeon why did you make Dahyun, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu cry? I didn't expect you to do something like that" Jeongyeon shakes her head out of disappointment. "Well I'm not gonna play a stupid pirate game because only babies play it" Nayeon frowns, she never looked up from her IPad. Jeongyeon decides that she needs to discipline Nayeon for her behavior so she acts on her thoughts. "Alright give me that IPad of yours because you're not having that or the TV for the rest of the day because of your attitude and actions, Nay" Jeongyeon easily grabs the remote and places it in her pocket, the actual challenge was getting the IPad out of Nayeon's grasp.

"Let go of your IPad, Nay." Jeongyeon commands but it was in a calm voice. Nayeon on the other hand wasn't one for giving up so easily "No you let go, old woman!" She retaliates, this then starts a tug of war between Jeongyeon and Nayeon which ends up with Jeongyeon dragging Nayeon across the dorm whilst she tries to get the IPad out of Nayeon's hands. "Hey, Hyo I need some help here" Jeongyeon calls out to Jihyo, who immediately goes over to see what the problem was. "What's going on?" Jihyo asked and her presence was enough to make Nayeon let go of her IPad and try to look innocent.

"Mom was being mean to me mama" Nayeon gave her best puppy dog eyes, which Jihyo didn't fall for this time. "Are you sure it wasn't because she was disciplining you because you've done something naughty?" She questioned Nayeon, who immediately frowned and gave up her act. "Yeah... But it's not my fault that they hit me constantly with their swords." Nayeon looks down at the floor and she messes with her hands. "We understand that Nay, but you shouldn't break their toys. Would you like it if they did it to one of your toys" Jeongyeon knelt down to meet Nayeon's eyes. Nayeon shakes her head and she finally understands what she actually did and how it was bad.

"Right, you're going to sit in timeout for five minutes and once you're out go apologize to Dahyun, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu" Jihyo tells Nayeon in a gentle tone. Nayeon went to the timeout corner without any complaints and she sat down in complete silence. After 5 minutes, Nayeon expected to be told by her mom or mama that her time was up, instead she was greeted with Tzuyu's face in front of her own face as well as Dahyun and Chaeyoung next to her ears. "Mama and mommy said that your time is up. And you need to say sowwy to us." Tzuyu explains quietly, she decides to stay in the same place.

"Chop chop, bunny Nayeonie." Dahyun says seriously and directly in Nayeon's ear. This made Nayeon make a face of pain, she then shuffled backwards so she could see all three of them. "I'm really sorry for being a big meanie earlier. Can we play together?" Nayeon says as nicely as possible. Her question made SMC's faces light up in excitement at the idea of actually playing with their older sister. "Yes! Play with Nayeonie!" Chaeyoung cheered as she grabbed her fixed sword behind her back, Dahyun and Tzuyu also grabbed their swords from behind their backs.

The rest of the day, until dinner time was filled with laughter and Screams as Nayeon was chased around the house by DaChaeTzu who recklessly waved their foam swords even when they weren't close to Nayeon. They carried on with their totally accurate swordsmanship skills until Nayeon showed them the treasure, which was only a box full of her toys but in their imaginations that was the gold they wanted.

Hello everyone as you could tell from the very first thing I did an extremely dumb thing. However, on a different note I've just been allowed to go on my break from work and college and thankfully everything that I've ordered has come this year instead of it being lost in shipping. Also a fun fact, my dog believes in Santa because normally she falls asleep at midnight but on Christmas Eve she falls asleep at 9 at night.

[thedrunkenreadersreviews]

A thought on the Loki series finale.

Oh, we are gonna need something strong for this one. Excuse me while I pass on the Scandinavian mead and just reach for my old pal Jack for this one.

*long sip*

One of my biggest regrets in life is not going to the theater to watch the first Thor film upon its release and, instead, waiting to eventually pirate the movie online. The reason for this is that Loki was my favorite Marvel character and I had no idea who the hell Tom Hiddleston was. So afraid was I that he would not portray Loki properly or that the writers would botch his story had me hesitant.

And then I saw it. And I was blown away by Tom's performance, as most people were.

*Sip, sip*

So I stuck around, enjoyed the MCU, watching it expand, following my favorite character around, and adored how the comics were realizing just how much of a tragic, triumphant story Loki could be and putting him through an incredible arc throughout the pages (Kieron Gillen & Al Ewing were exceptional Loki comic book writers!).

*Long sip, sip*

And then ... there was Infinity War.

*Long sip, sip*

I knew it was coming. That's what every writer does when they have a character they can take no further. Just kill them. Marvel was no different. They killed Loki, albeit, giving him a hero's death and that was that.

Like Thor, I mourned. I grieved, I cried, I sat in pain. I returned to the comics to feel comfort, to know that at least there he was still going and his story was getting better and better. It brought me peace.

And then I am informed of the Loki series and I celebrate. I had never been so excited for a TV show my entire life.

There is a chance, I thought, that he could come back! That he will return! After all, Loki is his most powerful in the comics. The God of Stories, can alter realities, step through the multiverse. He is incredible! He is also able to call on variants of himself, they being a part of him, like it is amazing and I was hoping they would give Loki a similar power in the MCU.

*Sip, sip*

And they did!

Loki became the God of Stories ... but at what price?

*Long sip, sip*

You see, for me, it is something much more heartbreaking than what happened in Infinity War. It is something far more tragic than that.

Sacred timeline Loki has the peace of death. He can walk to the gates of Valhalla, be reunited with his mother, his father, and one day even Thor. There is a comfort in that, knowing that yes, he is dead but he is at peace.

Variant Loki ... Variant Loki ...

*Downs the glass, pours another*

There is a finality in forever. There is, as Mobius says, no comfort in it. It is a burden. A glorious purpose, but a burden.

What hurts the most is this:

Since Thor 1, Loki has said that he never wanted a throne.

Only Mobius, B15 (Verity), OB, Casey, and Sylvie know. They know what he gave.

Since season 1, Loki has said that the thing that frightens him the most is him being alone.

Since Infinity War, Loki promised Thor that the sun would shine on them again.

What hurts the most is that Variant Loki, God of Stories Loki, is now burdened with a throne. That he made a sacrifice much larger than death. And only his friends know. That he is now entirely, truly, forever alone and does not even have the promise of death to give him comfort. There is no death for him. There is no peace, there is no end. It is eternity. It is forever and there is such a finality to forever.

And the sun shines down on Thor in every universe, it shines on other Lokis too. It shines on the people of Asgard, on Mobius, on New York, on everyone in every universe.

Loki kept his promise to Thor, and no one will know.

And while I know Mobius is mourning as we all are---feels like the TVA isn't home anymore, wanting to look because of what Loki did just so he could have the choice to look---I hope he takes the chance that Loki gave him and lives. I hope he buys the jet ski, rides it down the Hudson River. I hope that when he feels the wind in his hair, the water splashing his face, and the warmth of the sun shining down on him, when he is at his happiest and living, that in those moments, he thinks of Loki and smiles. Because I know that Loki would not want Mobius to take the chance he gave him to mourn Loki forever. I know that Loki will watch those moments of Mobius smiling and living, and he'll smile too, and in seeing Mobius taking the chance Loki gave him, making it mean something, that is the peace that Loki can receive. That is the comfort.

*Downs glass*

This ending ... it hurt so much more than Infinity War. I have never felt this way about a character's story. Am I happy with it? No.

Would I change it?

No.

This ending, this sense of grief unlike before, this mixture of elation and bereavement is drowning but incredible. It is the ending that Loki does not deserve but accepts, and that is why I wouldn't change it.

Loki finally became what he has been to me and to several fans of the MCU and Marvel as a whole. What he was always meant to be.

Loki finally became the heart of the MCU. And though we may never see him again---which now I find I oddly prefer---we will know that he is there, between the branches, watching, protecting, beating, and making sure that each and every story gets told.

[mays-corner]

(This post is a bit random so if you get it you get it if you don't get it it's fine)

It's 2024. I should be going to the disco, which I dislike.

Instead, I decided to hyperfixate on a Welshman.

One thing that baffles me to this day, and trust me it has happened more than once, is has anyone ever tried to protest at least a bit to still have Matt as John? Did no one try hard enough? Or have the attempts failed?

I mean-

I'm a newer fan (even with content crumbs I am a fan) still, so I can't be sure, but I'm amazed that in all these years that have passed, no one ever did anything, and now he can't even play Constantine (I think).

And now, the only role I've seen is him dubbing John 💀

Ignoring this discourse about John, I've decided to search for other roles, movies, and series, and what I've found was interesting, to say the least.

I am becoming passionate about him for various reasons. Other than wanting to revive pre-pandemic activities, I have noticed a pattern: I enjoy searching for things that I only watch. These are some thoughts I had about some things I could not find in Italy:

Hard to find (for example, I'm still searching for "The Halcyon," and the funniest thing about this is that in Italy, it was shown on TV (on an RAI channel, RAI is an Italian broadcaster) during 2017 and it's not available on their platform.

Region-locked content (the DCAU being region-locked is such a crime; we only have House of Mystery, and that's it) or even trying to watch a simple cameo when the entire series is region-locked (the Harley Quinn one). However (and this is good news), while searching for Away (one of his movies to watch), I found Tubi and used a free VPN. It was slow, but it worked, and I watched it.

Expensive (I paid Assassin's Creed Black Flag in installments, so that wasn't expensive, but still...)

It was a play, so they haven't recorded it, but to see and better understand the role he played (in this case, read), I read Thérèse Raquin by Émile Zola, and it was still effective.

Not even available on Chili (an Italian streaming platform on which you can rent or buy movies), the title only appears but is not available for streaming (lol).

Using Vinted or secondhand shops in general (it’s not the best time for me to go fully secondhand, but I suppose I could find some things there).

At the moment, I've watched just what I could easily find without resorting to piracy (which is ironic, since in Assassin's Creed Black Flag, Matt voices Edward Kenway, a pirate.).

In this list of things I could easily find, we have:

Constantine (thanks to another fan)

Criminal Minds/Criminal Minds Suspect Behavior (I had Disney Plus for a month, so I've watched it from there)

Flypaper, Adverse (Prime Video)

Arrow (Prime video)

Legends of Tomorrow (Netflix and Mediaset infinity)

House Of Mystery (Amazon prime, you have to rent it but still)

While writing this I found that "Layer cake" is on Sky, which I have and Now TV too.

Pocket Money (While watching it I just understood two words out of an entire short and I'm a c2 in English 💀)

Away, Wild Decembers, Armistice, Blood Monkey

So, you might have been asking yourself... Have I gone mad? To search and find for stuff not even available in my own country? In my own continent, too?

But I thought this is what comes with being a fan of someone, even if the career is what it is.

Considering me being unlucky, I was never able to see Matt when he acted and then had premieres at the same time.

Asssassin’s Creed Black Flag? I was 10, a child, lol.

Legends Of Tomorrow? I liked anime, manga and everything japanese.

And the list goes on...

It's nice to see what was like and what I couldn't live, gosh, I'm praying hard that we get to see him act again, I want and I wish to be present, live or not.

I wanted to make a really nice speech but nothing comes to mind, when I get it maybe I'll post it 💀

[jew-flexive]

Izzy Hands was the abuser, actually. And Izzy Hands wasn't poor or working class (but Ed was). And Izzy Hands sold people out to the cops. And Izzy Hands was homophobic and femmephobic. And you would know all of that if you had watched the show, instead of listening to a bunch of izcels talk about a character they did not understand using traits, plots, and quotes that they literally stole from other, usually POC characters. But I see you're a zionist. So I'm not surprised you're a stupid piece of shit.

....Whose kid is this? Why are they in my backyard?

Anyway, yeah, let's get into it! Edward Teach historically owned and sold slaves and engaged in broad-scale corruption by bribing public officials (including early modern police forces). He also murdered hundreds of people, and was generally an all around Certified Bad Dude. In OFMD canon, from what I understand, he physically mutilated Izzy multiple times and psychologically and physically abused People of Color, on top of the regular list of Pirate Crimes. So your fav, just like everyone's favs, is also problematic.

But Izzy Hands is also...not my fav? I don't watch OFMD? I made a tiny text post because a lot of my mutuals were upset, and I wanted to comfort them because I know what it's like to dedicate a lot of time/effort to a show and feel let down. It wasn't that deep. As I said in my properly tagged post, I don't watch OFMD because I wasn't able to separate the historical figures of Stede Bonnet and Edward Teach from the characters in the show, who were both very bad people in real life. That was a personal choice, and I don't judge anyone who watches OFMD--not even you, Anon!

(I judge you for other reasons!)

(Also, I could make a point about how because you like the character of Edward Teach, you're a supporter of slavery and a racist piece of shit, but I'm not going to do that because I have media literacy and also I'm not going to try to derive someone's political beliefs based on which characters they like in a TV show and nothing else. Because doing that is stupid. And childish. And pathetic.

Sound like anyone we know?)

I could dig into your whole "Izcel" comment and how you are ascribing onto a majority queer audience a term that has caused that community tremendous harm, thereby undercutting whatever progressive values you are trying to promote by attacking fans of a character you personally don't like, but if you aren't brave enough to come off anon to send me hate, you aren't worth my time of educating you. I encourage you to read some actual queer theory, and not just watch the TikTok summaries. I am more than happy to send you a reading list if you DM me!

Finally, I want to address your final point. I guarantee I have done more work to ensure Palestinian sovereignty than you have. I donate regularly to Palestinian NGOs and peace projects in Israel and Palestine. I attend rallies and protests, uplift the voices of Palestinian activists, organize in my community, and support organizers in the region itself. I am, as the majority of American Jews are, extremely anti-Bibi. I'm in charge of the office pool for the Palestinian Red Crescent, and I helped register voters for municipal elections in Israel to promote shared cities and a greater public voice for Arab citizens of Israel. I am committed to the cause of Palestinian liberation and self-determination because I am committed to the cause of Jewish liberation and self-determination. All liberation is connected, and I have spent five years dedicating myself to promoting a shared vision of hope, peace, and safety in the Levant. You have no idea what kind of Zionist I am, or if I even identify with that word. All you saw was that I made posts decrying the violence of Hamas and the hateful response by the rest of the world. All you saw is that my handle has the word "Jew" in it.

I don't know what you wanted to accomplish by sending this ask, Anon. Did you want me to recant my previous post and send a big "Fuck You!" to my mutuals who liked Izzy Hands as a character? Not going to happen. Did you want me to watch OFMD and start liking Edward Teach? Also not going to happen. Did you want to make me look like "a stupid piece of shit"? I assure you, I'm not the one who looks stupid right now.

Did it make you feel big? Did it make you feel powerful? Did it give you catharsis to send hate to a Jewish person, knowing there is no way for you to be truly held accountable? Does the idea of me reading this message excite you? Are you giddy at the idea that you might upset me? That you might scare me? I've had groups of grown men follow me out of work threatening to rape and kill me because I'm Jewish. I promise you, Anon, you don't scare me. You make me laugh. Imagine caring so much about a mediocre TV show you just have to harass a Jew about it.

Fuck you, you cowardly and antisemitic prick. You, like everyone else who hides behind anon to send hate, are so fucking small.

[catwouthats]

Do you know how I can watch stuff that’s usually on Disney plus in a way that doesn’t give them money?

Yes!

I have four answers for that!

1) Your local library

I know that not everyone is comfortable with pirating. The good news is that, nowadays, some libraries will let you borrow streaming services! I’d ask your library if they have something like that available (it’s usually a firestick) and if not, ask if any other libraries connected to your main one have it.

Also, even if they don’t have the streaming service, usually they have some sort of way to rent out movies or shows (weather online or in person)

And my dear college and information yearning friends, libraries have many databases and textbooks you can use for free!

2) A friend

Sometimes, someone else is already paying for it. Maybe a friend’s sibling or parent is paying for their whole family. Or maybe that person is paying themselves (Of course you wish they wouldn’t give money to them, but sometimes no amount of talking will stop them unfortunately). You could ask a friend, online or not, to share their account/family account with you!

3) Watch parties

A group of people coming together to save money/boycott shitty things. What’s better than that?

Online: Sometimes people will sharing their watching experience online. Usually on discord, tiktok, or instagram. You can join, you just of course have to find the accounts/servers that host these watch parties. I’d ask around on Reddit in order to find servers to join that do movie nights.

In real life: Also, you could get a group of friends/a club together to watch something on someone’s TV or some shit (some people even have those phone projector things so it actually feels like the theater). This is especially a good option if you’ve tried everything else and don’t want to personally resort to piracy… but might have a friend who’d do that for you…

You can find clubs at libraries, schools, colleges, and even retirement homes btw.

4) Pirating (of course)

To some people this might seem scary (because it runs the risk of viruses and and such), meanwhile, others might not even know how to pirate.

Here is how to pirate and precautions you should take when doing so:

Try to have an ad blocker (you don’t have to, it’s just an extra layer of protection. You probably should have one though)

You can use your phone instead of a computer, just know that it WILL fuck your phone up a little (personally I use my phone bc my computer is much more prone to viruses and information leaks. Ive been doing this for years and my phone’s fine… unless my storage gets near full/I have too many tabs open.)

Some internet providers may block you from using pirate websites on Google or Safari. I use Yandex as a search engine to get around this. With Yandex all I have to do is search “[movie name] watch now” and it will instantly come up for free.

Usually you can look up common pirate/free sites online and you’ll get some okay sites. Personally I use moviesjoy.is for live action movies/shows, readcomiconline.li for comics, and wcostream.tv for anime/cartoons.

Always ALWAYS X out the pop up tabs and close out things that say “you need to download this first” YOU DO NOT NEED TO DOWNLOAD ANYTHING FIRST (usually. Some websites do have downloadable versions… personally I don’t use those bc it risks viruses.)

Sometimes X ing out doesn’t work. you will have to reload the page or wait like 5-10 seconds for the X (or for “close”) to appear. It can appear in any corner of the screen. Sometimes even the middle of the screen. Like middle center or some shit.

It could take you between 1-10 tabs/pop ups to close before you’re actually able to access the shit. Especially if you don’t have an ad blocker. Be patient.

Going incognito mood would help keep your info safe… but personally I find it doesn’t make a difference. Doesn’t hurt to be extra careful though.

Also, would not recommend looking at questionable things on pirate sites on a library computer/property. Even if you clear history, the library knows. (They didn’t gaf that I used readcomiconline to read some comics on their firebook thingy. It’s just… know that they know.)

[complicatedchelsea]

Fallen Through Time For You

Chapter Twelve: Built This House of Memories

Masterlist:

(gif not mine)

(Sydney's POV)

Halloween 1986

“Are you sure we can’t talk you into going, Stevie?” Eddie teased as we waited for Robin to come out of Steve’s house. It was Halloween and Robin insisted she had to get ready at Steve’s because her parents couldn’t know that she was going to party and what she chose to wear would give her mother a ‘heart attack’.

Steve crossed his arms from where he was leaning against the doorway, the sound of the younger ones yelling from the TV room was very prominent. “And leave the kids alone in my house? I think not.”

“Mom doesn’t want to go trick or treating this year?” I teased as I peered through the doorway to see them bickering over a movie.

They had all decided they were too old to go trick or treating, but too young to get any invites to a high school party. With one look from Dustin and Max, Steve had offered up his house for a horror movie marathon, refusing to go to a high school party when Robin offered. Eddie jumped at the suggestion saying that parties were a great place to make some cash and talked me into going because I had never gone to any. Plus spending the night with a potentially drunk Robin? What could  possibly happen?

“Fuck off,” Steve laughed as he nudged me. “Those kids in there couldn’t pay me to go trick or treating with them.” He looked Eddie and I up and down. “I’m surprised he managed to talk you into going.”

“More like she wasn’t going to let me go by myself,” Eddie said as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “Do you like our costumes? Sid picked them out.”

“She is right here, thank you very much.” I said with a laugh as Eddie twirled me away from him, dress flaring out. “I couldn’t resist.”

“Are they being gross again?” Robin asked as she made her way towards the door, fixing a generic witch hat over her hair. “I won’t be able to put up with it tonight.”

I stuck my tongue out at her. “You’re just jealous because you didn’t ask Vickie to go with you.”

Robin rolled her eyes with a smile. “Can we talk about your costumes instead? What made you think it was a good idea?”

“You saying I can’t pull off white, Buckley?” Eddie asked as he let go of me to sweep his arms out. 

Eddie let me have full reign over our costumes this year and I just couldn’t resist the duo. After all the shit that happened back in September and being harassed in public (which thankfully had come to almost a complete stop), I had decided that Eddie should be the opposite of what everyone thought he was. Especially if half of the school was going to try and buy from him tonight, I wanted them to work for it. 

I dressed Eddie as an angel. A white, blowy shirt that we definitely took from a pirate's costume, white-tight jeans that showed off his great ass, his white Reeboks that took way too long to clean, and some cheap angel wings we found when we went shopping with Robin. He put his hair up in a loose bun and the whole costume had me flushed since he first walked out of his bedroom with it on. 

Since he was an angel, he insisted on me dressing as the devil. A red colored lace dress, fishnets tucked into a pair of Robin’s boots, fake horns on top of my head, and we topped it all off with one of those plastic pitchforks. Robin thought the matching costumes were hilarious, Steve just shook his head with a sigh claiming he put up with our antics enough during the rest of the year. 

“You are going to be the talk of Hawkins High tomorrow,” Robin said as she hugged Steve and started towards the van. “I can’t wait to watch the jocks squirm tonight.”

“Call me if there are any problems?” Steve asked us before we left. “I’ll come straight over.”

“Don’t worry,” Eddie said as he clasped Steve’s shoulder. “No one is going to piss off the drug dealer at a party and risk getting thrown out.” Eddie shook his metal lunchbox. “Plus I’ve got my own personal devil watching over me tonight, what could go wrong?”

The party was in full swing when we arrived. Eddie parked further up the block, but we could still hear the music when we got out of the van. 

“I’m getting drunk tonight,” Robin said as she put her arm through mine and pulled me towards the house. “I can’t believe this is going to be my last highschool party.”

“Poor Steve is going to have his hands full with you.” Eddie said as he appeared beside me. “You’re not drinking, are you?”

I shook my head. “Even if I liked alcohol, I wouldn’t drink at a highschool party. But no, I’m staying completely sober tonight.”

“I won’t make you drive the van back to Steve’s,” Eddie said as got to the doorway. “If you really wanted to let loose.”

I shrugged. “Alcohol just makes me tired, plus I really don’t fancy my first time getting drunk at a highschool party. Have you seen what they do to the punch? No thank you.”

Eddie just smiled and pushed us through the door. The party was in full swing, music blaring and party-goers dancing around the house. We were barely three steps into the house when one of the Hellfire guy’s caught Eddie.

“Eddie!” He yelled and went in for a hug, punch sloshing out of his cup that Eddie had to avoid. “You made it!”

Eddie laughed and patted him on the shoulder before using that arm to pull me closer. “Wouldn’t miss it. The rest of the boys here?”

He nodded his head towards the back of the house. “Jeff and Gareth have already set a spot on the back porch for you.” Grant nodded our way. “Robin and Sydney! Looking good!”

Robin rolled her eyes with a smile, “I bet you're telling everything lucky lady that tonight.” She looked past them and waved to someone further down the hall. “That is my cue. Find me in a bit?”

Eddie shook his head. “No need. Sweetheart,” Eddie jerked his head towards me. “Keep an eye on that one for me? Come find me in a while, maybe we can scare one of the jocks?”

Eddie wiggled his eyebrows but laughed as Grant started pulling him towards the back of the house and leaving Robin and I to our own devices. I heard Grant give Eddie some shit about his costume and I watched Eddie just shrug his shoulders with a laugh. 

“So alcohol?” Robin asked as she took my hand and led me towards the kitchen. We pushed past plenty of sweaty people, a few that Robin knew and a few that sent me some dirty looks. In the kitchen, there were a handful of people surrounding an orange looking punch bowl, and with one swing from a cup I could see the disgust on Robin’s face. 

“I told you so, babe.” I said, trying to hold back a laugh. “Was it worth it?”

“Shut up,” Robin muttered as she poured herself another cup. “Let’s go have some fun.” 

Robin’s definition of fun was to find the rest of her band friends and proceed to get tipsy as they played different card games. After losing UNO to Vickie again, I left Robin at her side and decided it was time to find Eddie. I hadn't heard anything come from the back of the house, but I missed him. I was expecting a bit more of his presence tonight and possibly getting a few kisses by the angel before the night was over.

When I pulled the sliding door and stepped onto the back deck, I could see the Hellfire boys rough-housing in the yard. Turning to my left, I could see Eddie in all of his “angel” glory sitting on the railing, metal lunchbox sitting next to him as some girl dressed as a cheerleader was handing him some cash. 

“Are you sure I can’t get a discount?” I heard her ask as I walked over. “Surely with how you are dressed tonight you can’t be a little gracious?”

I humphed as I got closer to the pair, making myself and my disgust to the statement known. 

Eddie smiled widely and held out a hand as I passed the girl to help me up on the railing next to him. I intertwined our fingers and used my other hand to wave at the girl. “Are we done here?”

She crossed her arms, pom-poms swishing with the motion. “And who do you think you are?”

I let my smile turn a little sharper and crossed my legs. “Ever heard of the phrase “angel on your shoulder”? Well I’m the “devil of this railing” and I suggest you’d pay the angel or move on.”

“He doesn’t belong to you,” She snarled. “He can do whatever he likes. If he wants to give me a discount, he can give me a discount.”

I laughed and turned to look at Eddie. “Do you not belong to me, baby?”

Eddie leaned forward,a manic grin on his face as he pressed his lips to mine in what I’d call a very possessive gesture. When he pulled back, his hand tugged me closer so I was pressed up against him, his hand falling to squeeze my thigh. “It’s written right here on my wrist, so I’d say I belong to her. Now are you going to pay full price or not?”

She gave him the money with a huff, making her way back inside and slamming the sliding door back closed. Eddie chuckled and tossed the money into his lunchbox before turning his attention back towards me. 

“Having fun?”

I shrugged. “I missed you. There’s only so much I can take from drunk nerds and their card games.”

Eddie laughed and leaned forward to press his face into my neck, his nose rubbing against me. “I missed you too, sweetheart. I’ve been so lonely without my other half tonight.”

“Anyone give you any trouble?” I asked as he sat back up, a loving smile on his face as he looked at me. 

“Just you,” he said as he closed the lunchbox. “I think I’ve sold enough for the night. Gotta keep enough for my regular’s tomorrow.”

A yell from the yard drew our attention as we watched Grant and Jeff try to dog pile on top of Gareth. They landed in a pile, resounding groans coming from them as the rest of the party goers continued around them. 

“So,” Eddie started to get my attention. I watched him check his watch, “We have almost two hours before we said we’d get Robin home. Do you wanna check on her and maybe find an empty room and give you the full party experience?”

“Edward Munson,” I gasped mockingly and pressed my free hand to my chest. “How easy do you think I am?”

Eddie’s face turned red and he gently shoved me as he jumped down. “It’s your mind that went to the gutter! I was suggesting getting high-my true party experience bu-”

I leaned forward to kiss him and stop whatever train of thought that was about to come out of his mouth. 

“How about this?” I asked as I pulled back to see the dopey look on his face. I flushed slightly at the thought that I was the one to pull that expression out of him. “Let’s go check on Robin and just maybe you can show me some of the highlights of a highschool party?”

Three hours later we had finally gotten a drunk Robin back to Steve’s. Eddie helped me drag her to the couch and I took off her boots as Eddie went to collect the rest of her stuff from the van. 

“I thought you were going to watch her!” Steve said as he pulled a blanket over her. Robin smiled drunkenly from the couch, going on about something Vickie and one of the other girls did in the one hour that Eddie and I was missing.

“We did! It’s not my fault she got talked into shots the one hour that I was occupied!”

“Occupied?” Steve asked with his signature hands-on-his-hips pose. “What could you have possibly been doing?”

When I didn’t answer, Eddie decided it was the perfect moment to enter the room. He was tying his hair back up, exposing all the work I did to his neck. 

“What’s all the yelling about?”

Steve took one look at me and how my hair was hiding my neck  and to Eddie, his neck now proudly showing off what we got up to in that hour. 

“You two,” Steve pointed between us. “Are taking the guest bedroom tonight. If you make any noise to wake me, I will not be happy. Got it?”

“Steve!” I exclaimed as Eddie laughed. 

“Don’t worry Stevie,” Robin slurred from the couch. “Vickie talked me into it, just a little bit of Vodka!”

Steve groaned and pressed the palms of hands to his eyes. “This is what’s going to finally kill me.”

Thanksgiving 1986

“Wayne, are you sure there isn’t anything I can do?” I asked from the table. Wayne was stirring a pot on the stove; he had been in the kitchen all day excited to prepare Thanksgiving dinner for the group that was coming tonight. Well, a group that consisted of Max and Steve. After I found out that Steve was going to be alone for Thanksgiving, it didn’t take much to persuade Wayne to invite him over. Same deal with Max, her mom was working the late shift for extra cash and I couldn’t just leave her across the street. Wayne always understood when I made requests like this; taking in Eddie when he had no one else. Wayne knew what it was like to have a mismatched family. 

 “I could at least-”

Wanye didn’t hesitate to send me the look that I had been well acquainted with over the last few months. I thought Eddie was stubborn? Wayne put the man to shame. I had been trying to barter with him all day, to let me do something to help out. But Wayne dug his heels in, claiming that what I made for dessert was going to be good enough. Dinner wasn’t going to be ready for at least another hour, but Steve had already called and said he was on his way, bringing over a movie that he claimed he always watched at this time when he was a kid. Max was already over, sitting in front of the TV with Eddie watching an episode of Scooby-Doo and the both of them were already in their PJ’s. It was a Munson tradition to wear PJ’s for the major holidays; Eddie said it was because of the shifts that Wayne used to work when he was younger. Eddie just getting up and Wayne getting ready to go to bed. 

“Sweetheart,” Eddie said as he outstretched a hand in my direction. “Please come sit with us. I promise it won’t kill you.”

“I just might if you get gross,” Max said from his side. 

“What about you and Lucas?” I asked as I rolled my eyes and left Wayne to his devices to sit with them. I took Eddie’s outstretched hand and he pulled into his lap without warning. Max made a sound of protest and rolled her eyes, but didn’t say anything else as she shared the blanket with the two of us. 

“What are you going to do when Steve gets here?” Max asked. “Can four people really fit on this small couch?”

Eddie sent me a mischievous look. “Well he can just sit on your lap then!”

Max snorted. “In your dreams.”

I laughed and Eddie just sighed dramatically and dropped his head to the back of the couch. “I guess he’ll just have to sit on top of you, sweetheart. It’ll be like a Steve and Eddie sandwich.”

I shook my head, the ridiculous image coming to mine. “Please don’t, the couch would just break under our weight.”

Max laughed and tugged on the blanket a bit in warning. “Here comes the good part.”

It was weird, watching an episode of Scooby-Doo a week after it came out when I had seen it from my time, way ahead of its actual air time. There was one week when Eddie was watching Saturday cartoons that I had spoiled the episode by accident because it was one that I had repeatedly seen in my time, but in this present time it was just airing. Eddie had pouted the whole day, refusing to forgive me until I had kissed it out of him later that night. 

Eddie was sitting mostly still, one hand rubbing up and down my back and the other messing with my fingers in my lap. I could tell he was excited. This was the first year that Wayne was actually here for the day of the holiday and he had more family over. He had woken me up so excited that morning, kissing every inch of my face as he rattled off all that he had planned. After dinner we were going to go over to the Byers-Hopper house (which came to a shock to no one when El showed up to invite everyone) for dessert, and Eddie had something planned for all the freshmen that he wouldn’t even tell me about.

It wasn’t too much later that there was a knock on the door before the door opened and Steve peered into the living room. “Happy Thanksgiving!”

Max echoed the sentiment with her eyes still glued to the TV as Steve sent the both of us a smile as he shut the door and hung his jacket by the door. “Scooby-Doo again?”

“How many times do I have to tell you, Harrignton?” Eddie mocked as he moved me off his lap to stand up. “If you are going to hate on Scooby-Doo, you won’t be allowed back in this house.”

Wayne made a noise in the kitchen. “Stop terrorizing our house guests! Steve, do you mind helping me with something for a minute?”

My mouth fell open in betrayal as Steve made his way into the kitchen, passing Eddie the movie he brought with him. Max scooted closer to me, laying her head on my shoulder and threading her arm through mine. “Thank you for inviting me.”

“Of course, squirt,” I said as I rested my head on hers. “I wasn’t going to leave all alone next door. You guys are the first family I’ve had in a long time.”

“Me too,” Max admitted to me, but she didn’t dare move her eyes away from the screen. “Since everything, Eddie’s made a point to check in with me, but since you’ve been here it’s like I have an older sister across the road. It’s been nice having someone else to rely on.”

I moved to pull Max into a side-hug. “You’re like the sister I never knew I needed, Max. Anytime you need me, just come straight over. I need you guys just as much as you need me.”

Max didn’t reply verbally, just chose to cuddle closer to me as we watched the episode progress. It wasn’t too much later before Wayne called for dinner, all five of us deciding to sit around the coffee table in the small space. 

“So,” Wayne started as he settled into his recliner angled towards the coffee table. He placed his coffee down and set his plate in his lap. “Eds and I have this tradition where we like to say one thing that we are thankful for that happened this year. I’d like to do that this year if everyone is alright with it?”

When none of us complained, Wayne smiled and picked his mug up. “While I have a lot to be thankful for this year, I’m thankful for the health of my nephew. I know that whatever happened during Spring Break was drastic, but I’m eternally grateful that he gets to sit here with me today.”

Wayne smiled at all of us. “Eds?”

Eddie cleared his throat, his face flushing slightly as he looked around the table and his gaze settled on me. He reached his hand over to grasp mine. “I’m thankful that I finally got to meet you this year, sweetheart. While it wasn’t the best circumstances, I’m so glad that I was able to have you in life. Even though you’ve only been here a few months, these have been the best months I’ve ever had.”

I squeezed his hand back. “I’m thankful that I was able to be with you, too. For whatever that brought me here, I have to be thankful that they brought me to you. My life was so boring without you, Eddie. And now I can’t imagine a day without you. You’ve given me a better family than I’ve ever had.”

Eddie sent a wide smile. 

Max cleared her throat. “Can I go now?”

It was two hours later that we found ourselves at the Byers-Hopper house. Wayne chose to stay back, wanting to watch the game and turn in early before his shift. He looked so happy as he hugged us bye, making us promise that we would bring him a piece of pie back. 

He stopped me just before I walked out, everyone already waiting in Steve’s car with Max arguing over the radio. “I wanted you to know that I’m thankful for you too, Sydney. With you being here, I’ve never seen Eddie so happy. You’re a part of this family now and for every future holiday.”

“Wayne,” I said as I felt my throat get thick with emotion. “You’re my family too. I’m so thankful that you took one look at me and decided I would be a part of your family.”

I was now sitting on the porch swing like I did my very first night, but this time I was watching through the window as most of everyone was laughing in the living room, some movie that Will put in was playing on the TV. Eddie had his journal in hand, Will and Jonanthan at his side as he made gestures to some conversation I couldn’t hear. I was okay with sitting out here to watch them for a bit, the love I was feeling making my chest feel full. 

“Sydney?” I turned to see El standing at the doorway. “Can I join you?”

I patted the seat next to me as El joined me on the swing, spreading a blanket over us that I didn’t see her bring out. “What are you doing out here?”

“I just needed a moment,” I said as I started to push us, El curling up beside me. “This is the first happy Thanksgiving I’ve had in a long time. No fighting, no passive-aggressive comments. I just needed a moment to soak it all in out here.”

“This is the first Thanksgiving I’ve had with everyone together,” El said. “Last year we were in California and while it was nice being with Joyce and Jonathan and Will, I missed Dad so much. I keep waiting for something to happen.”

“Me too, kiddo.” I said as I moved an arm to bring her into a side hug. “Nothing’s going to happen to us, all those people in that room would lie down their lives for you.”

“You too,” El argued. “You are just as important. We are all important to each other.”

I didn’t bother to argue with her and just kept swinging us. El was quiet for a few moments, following my gaze through the window. Joyce and Hopper had made their way into the living room, Hopper’s arm around Joyce as she laughed at something Steve said. 

“Dad says that he’s your guardian now, like he’s mine.” El said as she peered up at me.

I nodded. “Murray had to have a paper trail follow me here. The only way that he could do that is if he had me “placed” in Hopper’s care. Are you okay with it?”

El’s eyebrows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

I shrugged. “I’m used to people not wanting me.”

El sighed. “Well we both now have people that want us. Does that make you scared?”

“It does.” I paused. “There are some days that I am scared that I will wake up back in my old life and have no way to get back to Eddie.”

El shook her head. “I’d never let that happen. I’d find you anywhere that you’d go to.”

I hugged her closer to me. “I know you would.”

El sat up, determination etched into her face. “I don’t think you do, that’s why you are sitting out here. Away from everyone. You are a part of this family, Sydney. You are my sister just like Hopper is my dad. We are not related by blood, but that doesn’t matter.”

I pulled El into a strong hug, her arms coming around me to hold me just as tough. I let her break the hug, pulling back to wipe some of the tears that gathered under her eyes. 

“If I wanted to have a family dinner, would you come?” El asked. “Just us and Dad?”

“You could make it a weekly thing and I’d be there.” I said as El smiled and tugged me off the swing. 

I followed her into the house with no complaints, only being stopped as Hopper pulled the both of us into a hug. Eddie was waiting for me on the couch,  arms wide as I sat in his lap.

“Are you okay?” He asked me quietly so no one else would hear.

I looked around at the group in the living room. Steve and Robin taking the other end of the couch and throwing popcorn at each other, Dustin and Lucas arguing on the floor in front of the TV, and Joyce and Hopper sharing a mug between them.  

“I feel really loved,” I answered as I snuggled closer to him. “Thank you for letting me be a part of this.”

Eddie pressed a kiss against my cheek in response and just tightened his arms around me. “Thank you for wanting to be a part of it.”

Christmas 1986

When I came to, it was to Eddie’s humming and the soft touch of his hands down my back. I laid there for a moment, soaking it in and wondering how I got so lucky that I could wake up to this now. That Eddie shared his touch so easily with me, like we couldn’t survive without each other. When I opened my eyes, I became aware of our placement. Sometime during the night, Eddie had ended up on his back, myself draped over him and curled to his chest. Eddie’s head was leaned back on to his pillow with his eyes closed but looking completely content in the moment. 

His eyes peaked open and glanced down at me. When he saw that I was awake, his humming abruptly stopped as a wide smile stretched across his lips. “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”

I couldn’t help but grin back. “Happy first Christmas, baby.”

His eyes brightened in excitement. “Shit, it is our first Christmas. How does it feel?”

“Just waking up with you is making it number one for me,” I enjoyed the way Eddie’s face flushed. 

He groaned and his arms moved from around me to cover his eyes. “Do you have to be so sweet in the morning?”

I moved to straddle his lap and pouted at him. “You won’t let me be sweet on you at Christmas?”

Eddie peaked his eyes out of his arms. “Are you really asking me that, sweetheart?”

Before I could process, Eddie had flipped us, me underneath him as he straddled me now, moving his hands to my hips as he leaned down to kiss at my face, his curly hair tickling my neck. I laughed as he squeezed at my sides, legs kickin to get him off of me. 

“Eddie” I laughed out. “Get off of me!”

“That’s not my name, sweetheart.” Eddie sang as his kisses became more sloppy and moved down to my neck.  

“Baby,” I relented as I pushed my hands into his hair, still giggling. “Please!”

Eddie’s hands stopped and slid up to cup my face. “Was that so hard?”

I shoved at him before he caught my hands and held them over my head as he leaned down to give me a proper kiss. I sank back into the pillows, too occupied with his mouth to form a smartass remark.

A banging on the bedroom door broke us apart, Eddie’s face hiding in my neck as I felt the heat that came off his cheek from his embarrassment. 

“Kiddos! I made breakfast!” Wayne shouted from the other side of the door. “Come out so we can celebrate Christmas!”

I giggled quietly as Eddie groaned in my neck before he sat up in my lap. I raised myself onto my elbows as he stretched his arms over his head before looking down at me. I felt myself flush under his gaze. “What?”

He smiled before rolling off of me and standing next to the bed to help me up. “Just looking at you, sweetheart. Just looking at you.”

Similar to their Thanksgiving traditions, the Munson’s had their fair share of Christmas traditions. Wayne made a huge real breakfast in the morning, pancakes from scratch that barely took any begging from Eddie to have chocolate chips in them. Eddie turned the TV to a channel that was showing kid’s cartoons, claiming that when Wayne worked the night shift he would come home and watch a few cartoons with Eddie before opening gifts and heading to bed. Some Scooby-Doo episode played on the TV as Eddie made sure I was comfortable before heading to help Wayne in the kitchen. I couldn’t even complain before Eddie was throwing a blanket on top of me and giving me a mug of hot chocolate with a look that said not to move. 

When breakfast was finished, Eddie returned with two plates stacked high with pancakes and just downed in syrup. “Are you trying to give me diabetes?”

Wayne laughed as he dropped into the recliner next to me, his plate stacked just as high but missing the sugary syrup. “I don’t know how he doesn’t have it already with all the sugar he eats.”

I pouted as Edddie sat next to me, fixing the blanket in my lap and moving my mug to the coffee table.”You eat all this sugar but won’t let me be sweet on you?”   

Wayne let out a gruff laugh as Eddie’s face turned red and instead of replying he just shoved a bag of pancake in his mouth.

Eddie could barely wait for Wayne and I to finish breakfast, bouncing on the touch and taking the plates to the kitchen to soak while Wayne sat up with a groan and headed towards the tiny tree in the corner of the living room.  It was a whole event to get the Christmas tree up. I had never had a real Christmas tree before with my father being allergic, and Wayne had just pulled the most offended face and we went that day to get one. When Wayne had left for work that night, Eddie and I spent hours decorating the TV and different parts of the trailer with Metallic playing on low. Eddie had demanded that we spent the night watching Christmas movies and combating the coldness of the trailer. 

Now, in the present watching Wayne open the gift that the kids picked out, it felt like my first real Christmas. No being forcibly woken up to cook breakfast or either being given the cold shoulder because the gift wasn’t deemed “expensive” enough. But now, watching Eddie as he pulled out another Garfield mug to add to the collection, this felt like an actual Christmas. 

“Now,” Wayne started as he put the rest of the wrapping paper in a trash bag. “I have one more gift for you, kiddo. It’s not anything special, but I just wanted you to have it.”

Wayne reached into the tree and pulled out a tiny wrapped box. He handed it to me silently, choosing to take a seat on the coffee table in front of me. With a questioning glance at Eddie and one sent back at me, I unwrapped it to find a very tiny white box. 

“Wayne-” I started. 

“Sydney, just open it.”

Inside the box was a golden key. 

“Now I know that you have lived here for months,” Wayne started as I stared down at the key. Is this what I thought it was? “And you’ve been a part of this family since the moment Eddie brought you through that door. But you deserve a key because this is your home and I need you to feel like you are welcome here. No matter what happens kiddo, you always will have a home in this trailer.”

I felt my throat get thick with emotion and tears blurred my vision as I looked at Wayne. 

“Are you sure?”

Wayne let out a gruff chuckle and pulled me forward into a tight hug. I wrapped my arms tight around him in return, my new house key pressing harshly into my palm. “Kiddo, there is nothing more I want than you having a place here.”

I laughed wetly and felt Eddie wrap his arms around me, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. I was surrounded by my new family, one that I didn’t know how I got so lucky to belong to. 

Several hours later, Eddie offered the idea of going on a walk before the sunset and the temperature got too low outside. We left Wayne inside to a sports game and I got to lock the trailer door with my new key, Eddie laughing at my excitement.    

Bundled in several layers to ward off the cold, Eddie walked us around until we reached a rusted out playground on the other side of the trailer park. He wasted no time pulling me over to the iced over swings, taking off one his layers to place on the swing before forcing me to sit and push me gently. It started to snow softly around us, the sun becoming more and more amber in the sky, creating a beautiful sunset in the midst of the cold in Hawkins. 

“How does this Christmas rank now, sweetheart?” Eddie asked me from behind. His hands gently pushed my upper back, my feet making trails in the packed snow below me. “Is it number one?”

I planted my feet to stop the swinging, making Eddie pause for a moment before his hands left my shoulder and then he was kneeling in front of me. His beautiful brown eyes were glowing in the setting sun, his cheeks rosy against the harsh cold. I moved to take a glove off, wanting to touch his rosy skin with my hands. 

“Just waking up with you this morning already made it number one.” I confessed, my breathing coming out in a cloud of fog between us, his breath matching mine. “But I don’t think I’ve ever felt as loved as I have today.”

Eddie smiled widely, biting at his lip as he rested his arms on my dangling legs. “Really?”

In this moment, in front me, Eddie looked so perfect. With the snow gently falling around us and landing in his beautiful curls, to the way he looked at me. An emotion so great swelled in my chest, one that had been slowly building since I woke up here all those months ago. It was burning in my veins, feeling up every inch of me on the inside; fighting to get out and to be known to him. 

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” I confessed to him, my quiet voice carrying across the frozen wonderland. 

Eddie’s face didn’t change for a moment. His eyes searched mine before his cheeks flushed even more and his smile won out against him biting his lip. He leaned up at me to kiss me so softly, his gloved hands cradling my face like I was the most precious thing he had ever held in his life. The moment was so tender, so sweet, that I felt tears start to swell in my eyes. I had never been held this tenderly, kissed with this much emotion that I could feel it being passed back to me through the mark.  

“Sydney.” Eddie breathed as he pulled back and moved his hands from my face. He tore his gloves off in a hurry, his hand searching for my wrist and running his fingers over our mark. “Falling? Sweetheart, I fell for you the moment I saw my name on your wrist. I’ve been in love with you for all of my life, I just hadn’t met you yet. But I can wait for you to catch up, to be completely in love with me. I’ve waited lifetimes for you, what’s a little more?”

For a second time that day, I cried. I leaned down to meet him halfway again, kissing him with what I hoped was every ounce of love I had in my body. Eddie sighed quietly, and the adoration that he felt for me, I could feel that tenfold through the mark. He only pulled back when he needed to breathe and with a mischievous smile, he pulled me down into the snow next to him. Our laughter lighting up the snow-filled sky. 

1987

“So no vodka for you,” Steve said as he snatched the bottle out of Robin’s hand and replaced it with a wine glass that I believe was filled with a softer liquor. “I am not having a repeat of Halloween.”

Robin protested at Steve as he sat down next to her on the pool lounger, tugging his bottle of beer closer to his chest. 

I felt Eddie’s chest shake into my back as he wrapped his arms tighter around me, grabbing at the blanket that Steve threw overtop of us when he took all of us out here. It was a last minute decision to have a New Year’s Eve party at his house, but Steve wanted to be able to celebrate the new year with the people he loved. Even if that included all the underage ones in the house, watching the ball drop with cups of apple cider that they liked to pretend was alcohol. 

Steve, Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Eddie, and I were all camped out by the pool, drinks in hand as the year was counting down. Nancy talking about how excited she was to be able to graduate and attend Emerson, Robin choosing to take a gap-year to figure out exactly what she wanted to do, and Eddie determined to make ‘87 his year and finally get done with Hawkins High. 

“Did you accomplish any of your new year resolutions?” Nancy asked me. “Do you have any in mind for next year?”

I smiled as I cuddled closer to Eddie, feeling his arms tighten around me in return and a kiss being pressed to the back of my head. “As corny as it might sound, I actually think I did. I, ah, I said that I was finally gonna get out there and find people of my own. I was going to try and move out from under my parents and become my own person.” I turned my head to look up at Eddie. “I kind of did all of that in one day, didn’t I?”

Eddie smiled sweetly down at me. “What are you gonna set for this year?”

“Ah, ah.” I said as I waved a finger at him. “I don’t think I should tell you, you might try to steal mine.”

Eddie gasped dramatically and pulled me closer to him, teetering us over the side of the chair. “The betrayal!”

I laughed and heard the sound of groans around us. Nancy cleared her throat and when I looked at her, she was smiling. “As happy as it makes us that you two are happy, I might just wish for a little less PDA this year.”

Steve raised his beer in agreement and Eddie’s mouth dropped open. “We aren’t that bad!”

Jonathan snorted into his cup and Eddie had the audacity to look shocked. 

“Baby,” I said as drew his attention towards me. “We are kind of clingy.”

“Clingy?” Eddie repeated and scoffed. “If they think this is clingy then they haven’t seen anything yet.”

Before Nancy could argue, the backdoor slid open with El and Will standing in the doorway. El was bouncing with excitement. “It’s about to start! Come in so you can do the countdown with us.”

Jonathan laughed and pulled Nancy up with him as they started towards the door. With a ruffle of Will’s hair, the three of them disappeared into the doorway. Steve pushed Robin off the chair with a laugh and the two of them bickered as Robin threw an arm around El and they made their way into the house. As I stood up to take Eddie with me, he stopped me. 

“Do you think we could stay out here for this?��� He asked me as I sat back down in front of him, his hand already reaching for mine. “I want to be able to kiss you and not hear any complaints from there.”

“You know they were just teasing us, right?” I asked him as I let him take my hand. I don’t think there would ever be a day that I wouldn’t not let him take it. “But if you want to stay out here, that’s fine with me.”

Eddie smiled and his cheeks flushed. “No, I know. I just want to be with you for the countdown. Bring the year in together, just us?”

I laughed and leaned into his space to kiss his cheek. “That’s fine with me.”

Eddie settled back against the chair and with grabbing motion towards me, I let him pull me back against his chest. He moved us forward just a bit so he could pull the blanket back over us, and then sighed as he settled down behind me. 

“So,” Eddie started, his fingers tracing shapes around my mark. No matter where we were, or where he was touching me, Eddie’s hands always seemed drawn to my mark. “I have to make sure before the new year comes ringing in. I’m your boyfriend, right?”

I let out a surprised laugh but stopped when I realized that Eddie had froze behind me. I moved forward in his lap so I could turn to face him. “Wait, you’re not serious are you? Of course you are, Eddie.”

Eddie’s gaze moved to his lap, his fingers twisting around each other. “It’s just, I didn’t think I asked you?”

“Why wouldn’t you be?” I asked him. “We are soulmates, aren’t we?”

Eddie groaned and pushed his palms against his eyes. “I just got nervous about asking you! I just wanted to make sure that we were going into 1987 being on the same page!”

“Baby,” I sighed softly and moved so I could take his hands away from his eyes and intertwine them with my own. “What’s going on?”

Eddie took a moment to look up at me. “You’ve been here about three months, right?”

I nodded and squeezed his hands. “And?”

Eddie shrugged. “I was just thinking about the future today. It’s about to be the new year. New year means that things are going to be changing. Are you going to go through these changes with me?”

“Baby,” I said as I moved forward to be completely in his lap. “Wherever you go, I go. Whatever we decide to get up to this year, I’m going to be right beside you.”

“Are you scared?” Eddie asked me.

“Not since the day I met you,” I told him and I meant it. Sure, I was worried and had a minor freakout about my predicament. But being with Eddie felt right, being here in 1986 with him I felt more at home than I ever had. 

Eddie smiled and we could hear the start of the countdown from inside the house. He wrapped his arms around me, drawing me closer to him with our chests brushing against each other. I felt his warm breath hit my face and the cold air around us seemed to disappear. 

“To making ’87 our year,” Eddie murmured against my lips as loud cheers reached our ears. He surged forward to bring his lips completely against mine, kissing me passionately as I heard the noise of some fireworks going off in the distance. When I pulled back, I could see the lights reflecting off his beautiful face. 

“I love you,” I breathed into the air between us. 

Eddie’s eyes searched mine, his chest rising and falling harshly against mine. When he found what he was looking for, a love-sick smile made its way across his face 

“I know,” Eddie muttered. 

It took me a moment to process his response before I reared back, leaning as much as I could out of his space with his arms around me. “I know? Eddie, did you just quote fucking Star Wars to me?” 

Eddie’s mouth dropped open in amusement and I just pushed against him trying to get out of his lap. “I take it back.”

“Wait!” Eddie laughed as I stood up and wrapped the blanket around me. “Sydney! Don’t walk away! I’m sorry, sweetheart!.”

“It’s too late!” I said dramatically as I pushed away his arm as he tried to stand up. “I can’t believe you quoted Star Wars to me the first time I said I loved you!”

Eddie fell off the chair and grabbed at my ankle as I went to walk towards the house.

“Sweetheart!” Eddie laughed and I could barely keep my laughter in. He knew I wasn’t mad at him, he could feel the adoration I had for him through the mark. “I love you! Please!” 

Valentines Day 1987

“Steve!” Robin groaned. “Do not start this now!”

“I’m just saying,” Steve argued back at Robin. “Eddie has the advantage that Sydney is literally his soulmate, she has to like his flirting. That aside, I don’t think Eddie is that good at flirting!”

Currently Eddie and I had gone into Family Video to rent a movie and were sucked into an argument that Steve and Robin were currently having. Steve was laminating about his lack of dates for Valentine’s Day while Robin had blamed it on his horrible flirting. 

I snorted and Steve sent me an annoyed look. “I’m sorry Steve. Objectively, I am not going to be able to help with your argument. I can hardly tell when Eddie is flirting half the time.”

Eddie’s mouth dropped open. “I flirt with you all the time!”

I waved my hand. “Point made. Social cues, not really my thing. If Eddie’s name wasn’t on my wrist, I don’t think I would have realized he was it for me until he literally had to spell it out in front of me.”

Eddie gawked at me while Robin tried to hide her laughter behind her hand. “Do you think you could do any better?”

I raised my eyebrows at Eddie. “Is that a challenge?”

Eddie moved to lean his back against the counter, elbows bent and resting there. I moved to step in front of him, Steve and Robin taking a step back from the counter to watch us. I took a moment to gather my thoughts before I let a small smile paint my lips. 

“Eddie, baby. Can I hold your hand?” 

I heard Steve scoff from behind Eddie, but I paid it no mind as I stepped into Eddie’s space and held my out for him to place his in. Eddie’s eyes were wide, but gave nothing away as he gently placed his hand in mine. I made a point to gently trace a finger around his palm before I flipped his hand over and traced at his knuckles. 

“As nice as your hand feels in mine,” I started as I gazed up at him under my lashes trying to hood my eyes. “I think it might feel better wrapped around my neck.”

Eddie sucked in a shocked breath, his face turning very red. I heard Steve sputter and Robin bust into laughter. 

“I-uh.” Eddie tried to say as he stood up from his slouched position, but making sure his hand stayed in mine. “Sweetheart?”

Steve threw his hands up and I couldn’t help but giggle as I leaned closer to Eddie. 

“Didn’t mean to fluster you, baby.” I said as I dropped his hand and moved to push a rouge hair from his ponytail behind his ear. “Just had to let you see how well I can dish it out.”

Eddie’s other hand came up to rest against his chest, his face still beet red. “You can’t say things like that to me in public, sweetheart.”

Steve slapped a case down on the counter behind Eddie. “That is so not fair. I can’t just say that to a girl!”

I shrugged my shoulders. “Maybe to the ones you are chasing. But the right one? You’ll have her melting in her seat.”

Robin had finally quieted down before reaching forward with her hand above Eddie’s shoulder. I slapped her open palm for a high-five while Eddie just rolled his eyes with a smile. “You gotta teach me how to flirt with girls like that. Steve is no help at all!”

Steve sputtered again. “Robin!”

“It’s okay, Stevie.” I teased as I moved around Eddie to pat his hand. “You know how to flirt with some girls. I might just help Robin with the rest.”

Steve just took a deep breath as he stared at the ceiling. We all gave him a moment, fighting smiles as Steve had to reel himself in. He cleared his throat. “To change topics, what is everyone doing for Valentine’s Day?”

Robin shuffled some cases around. “Vickie and I might be going to see a movie?”

“Robin!” I exclaimed excitedly. “Look at you!”

Robin shrugged. “I don’t know if it’s a date. How do you see if it’s a date without giving it away that you want it to be a date?”

Steve shrugged. “You’ll know.”

Robin groaned and lowered her head into her hands. “That’s literally no help.”

“I’ve got something planned,” Eddie butted in. He sent me a wink. “Something that you’ll definitely enjoy.”

“You’re not going to share with the class?” I asked with a smile as I leaned into his side. “You know I don’t like surprises.”

“Oh, I know.” Eddie chuckled as his arm wrapped around my shoulders to keep me there. “But you won’t know until than.”

That’s all Eddie gave me, and I had to wait days to find out. Valentines Day fell on friday, which meant Eddie still had to go to school and our plans had to wait until after. Before I headed to Steve’s for the day, I stuck an obnoxious card in his lunchbox for him to find during the day. When school ended and I tagged along with Steve for Robin pickup, Eddie was sitting at the back of his van with both doors thrown open. He didn’t waste any time throwing the passenger door open and pulling me from Steve’s car, twirling me in a circle.

“Eddie!” I laughed as I lost my balance and fell into his chest. 

“Sydney,” Eddie said as his arms wrapped around my waist. “You can’t just leave cards for me to find like that. I might think you’re in love with me.”

My face flushed as I peered up at him. “I love you.”

Eddie groaned and his head fell back. “You can’t just say things like that!”

I laughed and moved out of the way so Robin could get in the passenger seat. “Have fun!”

Robin gave me thumbs up as Steve drove off and it just left Eddie and I in the parking lot. “C’mon,” Eddie said as he tugged me towards the van. “We have to go back to the trailer to change and then we will be on our way.”

To my surprise, when we got back to the trailer Eddie insisted that we change into some PJ’s. Giving me a hoodie of his to wear, he sent me off the bathroom to change with a promise of dinner. Once we were both changed, we got into the van and Eddie started driving in the direction of town. No matter how much I pleaded, the man would not give any answers. 

When Eddie parked next to the diner that we usually go to, I sent him a questioning glance as he told me to stay put and raced to the doors. He came back a few minutes later with a bag full of takeout boxes that he put in the back and would not let me peek. After we were driving a few minutes, I realized that the area around us was getting more and more wooded. 

“Where exactly are we going?” I asked him as he turned off onto a dirt road. 

Eddie groaned but sent me a smile as he turned the music down. “I guess I can’t really ruin the surprise since we are already here. I figured I would take you to Lover’s Lake to enjoy a picnic and watch the stars once it got dark. I thought that everywhere else in town would be busy, and I know that you would be more comfortable out here.”

I reached over to grasp his hand. “That sounds perfect.”

Once we got to the lake, Eddie parked with the back doors to the lake. He jumped out to get the back situated and I was surprised to see the amount of blankets and pillows stashed at the back of the van. 

“Are we having a sleepover?” I teased as I crawled between the seats instead of getting out and going around. “Is that why we are in our PJ’s?”

Eddie shrugged with a smile. “Since someone has a habit of falling asleep against me, I figured we might want to be comfortable. Plus, it’s going to get chilly later and I hate for you to get cold.”

Eddie was right. Once we had finished dinner and laid out to watch the sky darken, it was so peaceful I could fall asleep right against him. He was so warm, laying against all the pillows in the back of the van, the cool air blowing through the open doors. His voice was gentle and with the tone he was using to tell me about the latest campaign, I felt so at peace with him here. 

“Sweetheart,” Eddie nudged me as the sky got completely dark and the stars were shining brightly in the sky. “Can I give you my gift?”

I let him sit me up as he reached for something behind the driver seat. I moved to my bag, pulling out a small wrapped box as well. 

“Can I go first?” I asked him as he moved to sit with his legs dangling out of the van. 

Eddie smiled and held out his hand for the small gift. He didn’t open it, motioning for me to continue. “I really didn’t know what to get you for Valentine’s Day. Sure, I could get you some material items, but I wanted to get you something special.”

When I motioned towards the box, Eddie ripped open the wrapping paper and moved to take the cover off the box to see a ring sitting in the middle of the box. I felt my face flush a bit. “I know that you already have all these rings, but I came across this when Robin, Max, and I went shopping a few weeks ago. I know that you already have my name on your wrist, but I wanted to see something else of mine on you too.”

The ring was simple. It had a thick band, colored dark gray, and had a small moth etched into the top of the ring. When Eddie turned it over, he could see that I had our initials engraved inside the band of the ring. With another glance at me, Eddie slid it onto his ring finger, sitting proudly with the others of that hand. 

“Sweetheart,” Eddie said as he cupped my face to kiss me. The rings cool against my cheeks. “I love it.”

“It doesn’t have to mean anything!” I rushed out to say it because of the load of anxiety that washed over me. “I just wanted you to have something else to look down on and remind you of me. Also, it seemed like a really cool vintage ring and this one you don’t have to tape to fit your fingers!��

“Sydney” Eddie laughed softly as his hands tightened on my face. “I know and one day it just might mean something else. But for right now, I know what it is.”

I know that I was smiling love-sick at him, but I couldn’t care. Not with the emotions that I felt in my chest and pulsing at my wrist. “I love you.”

Eddie dropped his hands to thrust his gift at me. “Open it.”

I took the box gently, carefully opening it to see his guitar pick necklace sitting there. “Eddie?”

“I love you, sweetheart.” Eddie started as he reached forward to get the chain out. In that moment when he leaned over, I noticed for the first time that I didn’t see that chain wrapped around his neck. “I had a similar thought. I know that my name is etched into your skin and just seeing it some days brings me so much joy. But I couldn’t resist giving you the necklace. Now when you have your wrist covered, everyone will be able to see that necklace and see that you are mine.”

For the first time in a while, I felt pressure behind my eyes as I willed myself not to cry. Eddie moved to clasp the necklace around my neck, leaning back to let it fall against my chest as it seemed to catch some of the light from the stars above. “Hey,” Eddie cooed softly as he reached forward to brush at my cheeks. “What’s wrong, pretty girl?”

I sniffled and moved to place one of my hands against his. “Nothing. I just didn’t think I would ever be here with someone like you.”

“Yeah?” Eddie asked me with a smile.

“I love you so much,” I told him. “And there are days that I just look at you and I can feel it tenfold back through the mark and I just wonder about how I got so lucky. I literally fell into your lap.” I laughed wetly. “And giving me this means so much to me. You wear this everyday, aren’t you going to miss it?”

“I have something else to wear now,” Eddie said as he wiggled his hand at me. “But I love you too, sweetheart. I will never have to doubt anything because there are days for me too that I just look at you and I can feel all of it.”

Eddie dropped his hand and with a wave of his fingers, I followed his movements so I was laying against him in the back of the van. We could still see some of the stars that were further out in the distance; but here now with Eddie, it felt like we were the only ones in our little world. With his arms wrapped around me and the feeling of Eddie tracing shapes into my back, I felt perfectly at peace. 

“Happy first Valentine's Day, sweetheart.” Eddie said and I felt a kiss at the top of my head. 

“How are you going to top this one next year?” I asked him.

Eddie laughed and I could feel his body shaking against mine. “That’s all on you sweetheart.” A pause. “But you know what would make this better right now?”

“What?” I asked him as I looked up at him, my chin resting against his chest. 

“If you kissed me. Kissed me alot, actually.” Eddie said with a mischievous smile. 

The first time I leaned up to kiss him, I couldn’t keep the smile off my face which barely made it a kiss at all. But when Eddie rolled us over so he was hovering above me, the kiss was definitely more passionate. 

And it was no one’s business if we ended up falling asleep out there under the stars. 

Only for us to be rudely awakened by our bladders several hours later. 

Sydney’s First Birthday in the Past

“Happy birthday to you,” someone was singing in my ear quietly as I was roused from sleep. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

I groaned and opened my eyes to see Eddie laying on his side beside me, a tired smile on his face. “What?” I asked, still on the edge of sleep. 

Eddie reached forward to tuck some hair behind my ear, biting his lip at me. “It’s your birthday, Sydney.”

I blinked a few more times before I was fully awake. “It’s my birthday?”

Eddie laughed and shuffled closer so he was laying against me, an arm wrapped around me and his forehead coming to rest against mine. “Well that’s what the government paperwork says. Is it true?”

I shrugged my shoulders. “What would you do if it was?”

Eddie pulled back a little to look at me. “Do you not like your birthday?”

I shrugged again. “It was always a mute point when I was younger. It always fell on a weekday so I had to go to school and my parents refused to do something for me when they got home for work. My brother, though? They would pull him out of school for the day and always take him out to dinner.” I tried not to show how much it bothered me. Eddie has already done so much, I didn’t want him to feel like he had to go all out for this too. “It just became another one of those things.”

“Well,” Eddie said as placed a kiss on my forehead and then trailed them from my cheeks to my chin. “We celebrate all holidays and birthdays in the Munson household. Sorry, sweetheart. You are just going to have to tough it out this year.”

I tried to pout at him, but his smile was so infectious that I couldn’t help at the one that tugged at my lips. “So Dungeon Master, what do you have planned?”

Eddie laughed and moved to sit up, pulling me along with him. He grabbed one of my hands in his, the other moving to trace lines against the back of it. “Wayne made you a special breakfast.”

I groaned in protest. “Please don’t tell me you dragged Wayne into this.”

A gruff chuckle tore my attention to the doorway to see Wayne standing there, sleeves of his flannel rolled up with a smile on his face. “All the boy had to do was mention that your birthday was coming up.”

I sent him a small smile. “Morning Wayne.”

Wayne nodded his head. “There are fresh cinnamon rolls in the kitchen if you are interested.”

“You made me fresh cinnamon rolls?” I asked excitedly. “No one has ever made them for me!”

Eddie chuckled beside me. “So get your ass in gear and get some while they are still warm.”

I threw the blanket off and followed Wayne into the kitchen. It smelled so great in there I couldn’t help but melt when Wayne placed a plate in front of me at the table. One bite and I was trying to hold back a moan. “Oh my god, Wayne. These are so good.”

Wayne laughed into this coffee mug, placing the comics he was reading from the newspaper back onto the table. “Don’t butter me up.”

“I’m serious!” I laughed and took another bite. “This is the best thing anyone has ever made for me.” 

In one second Eddie appeared behind me, smelling strongly of his body wash and leaned forward to take the bite off my fork. I turned to look at him, betrayed as he swallowed. 

“Go get ready, sweetheart.” Eddie said as he took my hand and helped me up from the table. “You’ve got a day ahead of you.”

I frowned. “Eddie, I don’t wa-”

Eddie held up his hand. “I already know you don’t want me skipping school. So I’ve made other plans for you.”

A threw a nervous glance at Wayne and he just took a drink of his coffee. “All I know is that we are meeting up later for dinner.”

I narrowed my eyes at Eddie. “What do you have planned?”

He winked at me and took another bite of my cinnamon roll. “Go get changed and you might just find out.”

I ran and took a quick shower, towel drying my hair as I grabbed one of Eddie’s sweatshirts to put on. It clearly was a P.E. sweatshirt, but the arms had been drawn all over with designs that looked similar to what was on Eddie’s D&D notebook. 

When I got back into the kitchen, Wayne was already in his recliner watching some morning TV while Eddie was on the phone. When he saw me, he abruptly got off the phone before making his way to me. 

“Comfy?” He asked as he leaned down to kiss my forehead. 

I raised an eyebrow at him. “What did you do?”

Eddie just smiled mischievously at me and motioned towards the door. There was no Max waiting for us at the van, and Eddie shrugged like he didn’t know who took her to school. I let him keep up his charades as we started the familiar path towards town, only slightly surprised when we pulled up to the police station. 

Hopper and Joyce were leaning against her car in the parking lot, their faces lighting up when they saw us pull in. I had only just gotten out of the van when Joyce had wrapped me in a tight hug. 

“Happy birthday!” She said really loud as she pulled back to look at me. “Do you feel any older?”

I rolled my eyes in amusement as Hopper stepped around her to pull me into a quick side -hug. “Happy birthday, kiddo.”

I smiled at both of them and felt when Eddie joined my side. “So what is the plan for today? Eddie won’t tell me anything.”

Joyce shrugged, but the smile on her face said otherwise. “I thought you and I could have a girls day. Give you a treat for your birthday.”

“Joyce-” I started to argue that it wasn’t necessary before she sent me a look. 

“You are one of my kids now, Sydney.” Joyce said as she reached out to squeeze my shoulder. “If I want to do things with you for your birthday, I sure as hell am going to.”

I laughed and nodded my head in defeat. “Okay then.”

Joyce made a happy noise and turned to start her car while Hopper waved at us and started to make his way into the station. I only turned to Eddie when I felt his fingers intertwine with mine, giving my palm a gentle squeeze. 

“Is this okay?” He asked me, nervously. 

I smiled at him. “It’s perfect.”

Eddie perked up and with a quick glance around he leaned down to kiss me. I let him, getting lost in the sensation of his body against mine, whining slightly when he pulled back. He chuckled, using his free hand to play with the chain that had been sitting against my neck for some time now. “I love you, sweetheart.”

My smile widened if possible. “I love you too, baby. Will I be seeing you after school?”

Eddie’s smile turned mischievous. “Well I still have a present to give you. But, I don’t know. Will you?”

Eddie stepped back from as I felt Joyce’s arm wrap around mine. “We ready to go?”

“Have a good birthday, sweetheart!” Eddie yelled as he got back into his van, the music blaring as he buckled himself in. “See you later!”

Joyce and I watched him peel out of the parking lot, some of the people walking around town shaking their heads at all the noise. When he was fully out of sight, Joyce tugged me in the direction of her car. “You ready to get our day started?”

Joyce’s first stop was a little bookstore a few town’s over. We roamed the shelves for a bit, me picking out a few books that I hadn’t read in years but seemed to be new releases here. I couldn’t resist the dragon bookmark in the fantasy section, but I knew that it wouldn’t be me using it and Joyce must have had a similar idea with the look of amusement on her face. 

Our next stop was a tiny hair salon two shops down on the same street. It was run by a lady that knew Joyce by name, taking me back to the chair and telling me whatever I wanted was already covered. I sent a look towards Joyce, but she just shrugged and sat down in the chair next to me, already talking away to the lady bringing her a coffee. 

I frowned in the mirror, one of the books that I bought sitting in my lap. “It’s been years since I’ve had my hair professionally done. What do you suggest?”

“Is this wave natural?” The lady asked me as she ran her hands through my hair.

I shrugged. “I believe so. If my hair isn’t down, most of the time I have it braided back in some way.”

“Hm,” The lady said as she moved to get a cape and secure it around my neck. “How about we cut a few of the dead inches off and go from there? What about a color?”

I moved my hand to pinch some of the hair between my fingers. All my life I had been a lighter shade of brown, borderlining on strawberry blonde. “Why not?”

It took a lot of debating and a long talk of my preferences before the hairdresser-Angela, asked me to trust her and I agreed. If I hated the color, I could always color over it? Joyce had finished not too long ago, sitting with me as I sat under one of those obnoxious hairdryers. 

“I think she picked a great color,” Joyce said with a smile. “Are you having a good time?”

“The best,” I smiled at her. “You know, my mom would never do something like this with me.”

“Her loss.” Joyce said, a tone to her voice. “You’re one of my kids now, sweetie. Anything that she wouldn’t do with you, I will. Don’t you worry about that.”

After my hair was processed and washed out, I let them keep the element of surprise as they turned my back to the mirror so they could style it for me. When they were finally finished and I got to turn around, I couldn't help but gasp. Angela styled my hair in soft curls falling down my back, nothing like the corkscrew curls that I’d seen at least two women walk out with today. As for my hair color, it was a deep copper color that really stood out against my skin tone and made my hazel eyes pop. 

“Woah,” I said as I reached up to feel a strand. 

Angela clapped beside me. “It’s a perfect fit!”

Her excitement was infectious and I couldn’t help but laugh along with her. “You did such a good job!”

With the promise of coming back for a touch up, I followed Joyce out of the salon and to a tiny cafe a street over. We had a small lunch, Joyce making small talk about the kids and Hopper but I could tell something else was bothering her. 

I sighed. “What is it?”

Joyce watched me for a moment. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

I nodded. “Why do you ask?”

Joyce reached out a hand to place over mine on the table. “It’s just your first birthday away from your parents, your friends. Eddie was worried today might be hard for you.”

I frowned. “Why would he think that?”

“El might have told me about a conversation she had with you at Thanksgiving,” Joyce said with a shrug. “I realized I might not have been checking in with you as much as I should.”

“Joyce,” I let out a relaxed laugh. “El brags me to family dinners with you guys almost every other week. You see me all the time.”

Joyce nodded. “I do, but I just wanted to make sure you knew that you could come to me about stuff.”

I squeezed her hand. “I know that I can.”

Joyce took a sip of her coffee. “You know Murray mentioned something to me the other week.”

“Hm?”

She placed her cup down. “He mentioned that when his partner was brought to the past, a box of some of his more personal items showed up. Has that happened to you?”

“No?” I shrugged. “I didn’t know that it was possible for that to happen. Nancy never mentioned it to me.”

Joyce frowned. “He should be back in Hawkins for a few days. Maybe you could ask him?”

We didn’t stay too much longer, Joyce saying it was her turn to carpool, but letting me know that Eddie had planned to meet with us at the school. 

“Not that I don’t think of El as my own,” Joyce said on the drive back. “But I really want you to know that you have a place in my family.”

I smiled. “I know that I do. I think between you, Hopper, and Wayne acting as parents with Steve trying to prove that he is my brother; I’ve got all areas covered. I promise you since I’ve woken up here I haven’t felt truly alone.”

“Good,” Joyce said. “We’re a weird group, aren’t we?”

I don’t think I could have asked for a better one.

When we got to the school, I shouldn’t have been surprised to see the group that was waiting at Eddie’s van. I only had a second once I got out of the car to get bombarded by the younger ones, trying to pull me in hugs and El trying to sing me happy birthday. 

“Guys,” I laughed delighted at the love I was receiving. I almost had to stop for a second at the sheer feeling of adoration that hit me, but it wasn’t hard to place where that emotion came from when I met Eddie’s eyes. He was leaning against the van, a smile on his face as he waited for his turn to get to me. 

Steve stepped forward, pulling me into a quick hug before throwing an arm around Dustin. “Since you didn’t tell us how important today was, we didn’t have any time to throw something together.”

I shrugged, not bothered about it. “I didn’t want you guys to make a big deal about it.”

Steve pointed at me. “Well, we will. Just wait.”

After a few more minutes of ‘Happy Birthday’ wishes and hugs from everyone, they all split into groups between Steve and Joyce. I waved back at them as they all got in their cars, leaving Eddie and I in the almost empty parking lot. 

When I turned to him, he was still leaning against his van with his hands tucked into his front pockets. He pushed off the van and slowly made his way to me, reaching out to pull at a loose curl. “You changed your hair?”

He tucked a strand behind my ear, fingers trailing along my jaw. “Do you like it?”

“Like it?” Eddie asked as his other hand joined the one on my facing, moving to rub his thumbs against my cheeks. “Sweetheart, that color does wonders to you. Damn,” Eddie let out a groan and closed his eyes with a smile. “Are you trying to kill me?”

My laughter was silenced as Eddie leaned down to kiss me, my eyes fluttering closed at the intensity of it. When one of Eddie’s hands moved to grasp mine and his fingers brushed against my mark, I almost gasped at the feelings I felt thrown back at me. 

Eddie broke away from me, staying close enough that our lips lightly brushed when he talked or more like whispered to me. “As much as I enjoy kissing you, we do have dinner plans.”

“We do?” I whispered back. 

He stood up fully now, but never letting go of my hand. “Wayne wants to take you out for your birthday. Can’t argue with the man.”

I smiled. “Well if he insists…”

“Now you’re getting it!” Eddie exclaimed as he moved to open the passenger door of the van and help me into the seat. I see him sprint across the front and as soon as he turns the keys, the van is filled with the loud music of Blue Oyster Cult. Once we’ve stopped at the trailer long enough to pick up Wayne and let Eddie dump his stuff, before we are on our way towards town. 

“Maybe next year we can actually make a plan since I know when your birthday is.” Wayne said he slammed the door shut. 

“Wayne-” I started to explain before he held up a hand. 

“Eds was the same way.” Wayne said as he pulled me into a side hug, Eddie raced ahead claiming to get the best booth in the back. “The first year he lived with me he didn’t want to celebrate anything. But I get it, kid. One day, you’ll want to start celebrating it too.”

Wayne opened the diner door for me, ushering me and as I turned to try and find Eddie-

“SUPRISE!”

The diner seemed to be empty except for my mismatched family. Eddie was standing closest to the doors, my favorite smile on his face with his arms stretched out wide. Steve and Robin off to the side of him, eyes bright as their smiles. Joyce, Hopper, and Murray sitting down in the booth off to the side, drinks raised at me. Lastly, all the younger ones were standing right in the middle with Nancy and Jonathan behind them, balloons and party favors in hand. 

I felt my eyes get wet, and it took me a few blinks to convince myself not to cry. Wayne squeezed my shoulder before moving around me and heading towards the other adults while Eddie moved to stand in front of me, taking one of my hands in his. 

“This okay?” He asked as he squeezed my hand.  

“I don’t know what I would do without you.” I said instead. 

Eddie beamed, leaning down to kiss my forehead before moving to wrap an arm around my shoulders and led me to the chaos of my surprise birthday party. “You’ll never have to know, sweetheart. Now why don’t we get some of that cake?”

Ah, hello my beautiful people. It's been a few weeks, hasn't it? Well I'm back and better than ever (had a whole allergic reaction and I won't bore you with the details but I am better and on medication for it now so no worries :) ). So this is a long one, I hope you enjoy the meal! I've been anxious to get into the main part of the story, and it's going to start in the next chapter so be prepared! I figured we could see a glimpse of the life Sydney and Eddie are living before I get into the nitty gritty. Leave a comment telling me if you liked it!

Also just in case we need to know, what should be have as Sydney's Vecna song? I'm trying to decide between something that easily accessible (which means the song is already out), or the potential issue that the song hasn't been written yet. Let me know what you guys think!

Leave a comment if you want to be tagged!

Taglist: @silky-luxe @disaster-in-waiting @sadbitchfangirl@welliguessiwritethingsnow @comboboo@tuttigunner@avalon-wolf @goth-cowgirl-03

[tenrose]

I gave up, the website is too shitty, literally nothing functions. Idk if the payment really failed or if those suckers are just not able to properly write 'it's sold out'

Now that I'm slightly annoyed...

I'm gonna rant.

First of all theaters can go fuck themselves if they are not able to provide proper services. The cinema I'm talking about in particular is not indie by the way, it's one of the biggest chains here (fuck you UGC) so the bare minimum they could do is provide with actual functional website so people can actually use it and make reservations. Don't even get me started on the price. 11,60€ for me to fucking go out and see people???? And we know seats aren't as good as they used to be in the past. Don't know about the snack prices, I bet it costs two kidneys.

That being said...

FUCK STREAMING PLATFORMS TOO OR EVEN ESPECIALLY

obviously I ain't paying for any. I won't pay for 10 different platforms, and especially not Amazon they can literally rot in hell. Don't even get me started on netflix. I used to pay sometimes back then. Honestly they had something. They used to do an actual effort and trying to show different stuff. They let creative direction to their writers. We wouldn't never have sense8 with today mentality tbh. Everything is just a reboot, a book adaptation emptied from its substance, a reboot, and book adaptation a reboot, a book a- you see the thing. I mean I shouldn't be bitching as pretty much never watch anything new for years so what do I know? I mean I would like to, but every time I watch a trailer, I'm tired just by watching it. Latest exemple I'm thinking about is the three body problem... Like having read the book just watching the trailer you could see the Americanism all over it... For a chinese book. And it's the problem with everything. I mean American TV shows have always be like this, maybe being younger I wasn't aware back then idk. But it feels so empty, so soulless? They can give me all the diversity they want, that doesn't change that it's still empty. And for TV shows (actually I'm talking more specifically about TV shows cause I'm not a big cinephile so I don't have the legitimacy to criticise) I know it's because of that stupid ass 8 episodes format. I've already talked about it. But it's literally draining the whole industry imo. Also writers clearly having little creative freedom since they have to make stuff that sells. But yeah, TV shows lasted physically and in memories because we were watching them slowly instead of this boulimie stuff we have now. Everything is like consume, forget, consume forget and pay shit ton of money.

And I'm thinking I am actually not built for this shit. I felt so burn out not being able to enjoy anything. So now I don't even try. I don't try new shows cause it's not worth it even when there's an actual good one. Because it's gonna be cancelled anyway. Who wants to emotionally invest in shows that get cancelled (I did so many time).

But when I do.

Be sure I will pirate the shit out of it. None of these industries deserve our money.

To finish on a positive note, if there's one thing I'm really happy for in the end. It's books. Sure the book industry is oversaturated too and there's ton of shit to criticise too (but I won't here). But it's so vast there are books everywhere for everyone, and even if tomorrow not a single book would be published (which I don't believe in), there are enough books for my entire life anyway. But yes books, even if formatted too (looking at us french snobs with our novel format), are like the only place writers can still let go of their creativity. Plus you can have cheap books (I'm starting to get there) and obviously free books thanks to libraries, and also you can pirate books too. Yes I pirate books too but tbh it doesn't even compensate how much I spend buying books so I'm not feeling guilty and I either pirate popular books or old books (if they are really old it's free anyway). But yes if you go out unlike me go buy books if you have money, to your local bookstore, or if you can't library is your way.

Reading is my anchor ⚓

[abbinurmel]

I have been agonizingly and repeatedly where my bf is right now, where it comes to nurturing people who are close to you and whom do not try to directly abuse or affect you in shitty ways themselves, but their constant personal life dramas and how they abuse alcohol/self sabotage out of nilhilism and stubboness, causes you to wanna obsess over taking care of them or stepping into their drama uninvited as mediator w. 1) the desire to fix their problems for them just out of good friendship in exchange for their many kindnesses and 2) the fear of them abandoning you or God forbid throwing themself off a cliff if they never recover.

And I don't wanna both sound hypocritical/pedantic and also thougtless- but there's a diff when it's internet friends vs. irl. And one part of me argued the long distance friend with a problem is more unhealthy worse and more without point to obsess with. The other hand, irl indirectly toxic drama friend, has actual immediate impact that actually takes itself into your life.

My point was forgotten here. I guess I just feel weary and sad and sorry for these people all involved.

And. Yea. I know. I can never have right to judge others or how we all cope with our pain. We all struggle with inner mental illness or barriers and I just hafta accept as adults we are only able t b responsible for ourself and we all have our own paths to take. I have my own toxic addictions too.

......But I'll say the hot take anyway.. cos fuckit.

....drinking abuse is really really fuckin frustratingly dumb especially when you are over 25. What even are you fucking doing, treating your angst or life problems this way. You need a coping mechanism to escape life, instead of actually taking your inner demons and working thru them? Modern life has provided you with an endless supply of vices and addictions to give a cheap hit of sweet dopamine or a distracted altered state. Tiktok, sex chat, table top gaming, gambling apps, doomscrolling, cook something, go to a sex dungeon, play Animal Crossing, write Animal Crossing fanfic, write tawdry and/or tawdry Animal Crossing fanfic and/or wank yourself into a coma, WE don't hafta know!-

Ffs...weed's fucking LEGAL now in over 29 states in the US, you can dye your hair and paint your nails in any color conceivable and you can cosplay as someone else and you can dress however you goddamn want cos in the world of Amazon you can consume any possible product and shop addict yourself into being broke. You can listen to any music now, watch nearly any TV program or film of the last 100 years, and read almost any literature or comic or play any videogame that is possible to buy or pirate. You can marathon now or binge in ways that wasn't possible even less than 20 years ago. You can roleplay as any possible gender animal or age you could want and the damned endless amount of hobbies and skills you could pour focus in....

There are a million other unhealthy but still less.unhealthy, more creatively degenerate habits and vices you could partake in. You could vape in almost any flavor. You could destroy private property and invent cool tag slogans or mascots to graffiti on your neighborhood. You could steal from corporate stores, it's practically cool now to morally do. You could peddle absurd misinfo, draw porn, get into crypto, get into ASMR,.get into tattoos, piercings, absurd fad diets, you could do illegal drugs that at least make you FEEL EUPHORIC INSTEAD OF SHIT ANYWAY (which disclaimer no, you shouldn't actually do them but if you're gonna do shit anyway-) I hear Molly, Ecstasy, light shrooms, meth, coke and such are fun. You could at least imbibe some dumb shit that fucks you up but doesn't make you a whiny,.moaning, miserable, bitter sonuvabitch who just mopes about why do they still not feel good and you already knew would never made you feel good, emotional or physically, and then throw up. What is your fuckin aim here. Are you stressed and tired, you wanna pass out? Take a fucking regular depression nap then. Or take sleeping pills, or some Benadryl, or go have some.really intense good sex, and let that pass you out. You need to relax your muscles and shut off racing thoughts? Either get a prescription from a doctor or just drink warm milk and take a hot bath like all the fuckin rest of us. Unless you are a broke and homeless person with no hope of access to any material resources or pleasures or amounts of self care without being granted those valuable resources from the outside, or you are someone in a 3rd world country with access to not a single one of these many amenities, options, vices, or informative resources on how to cope with problems, for mutherfucking fucking sake, WHAT are you DOING.

[tryan-a-bex]

Halloween; or, Violence, seen from far away, is entertaining

Inspired by a comment by Moreta (ao3), @entropy-mephit, who also did the art! My version and hers are included below. Hers is the fancy one! (Read on ao3.)

Hob watched over Dream’s shoulder as he scrolled through Pinterest posts of Halloween costumes.

“Hob, I do not want to do this. Why may I not just go as myself?” he grumbled.

“No! Love! The point of a Halloween party is to get dressed up and admire each other’s costumes! Don’t worry, the faculty has a huge range of investment is costuming. Some will go all out, especially the arts profs, but plenty of us are going to keep it simpler. What do you think of that pirate costume?”

“What if I go like this?” Dream suggested, suddenly two feet taller and dripping shadows everywhere. Hob cupped his pale, amorphous cheek tenderly in his hand.

“You know I love your Nightmare form, but I think it would be a little over the top for the party.” Hob blinked and Dream was back in his accustomed form, pointing at another picture.

“This one has cat ears, and a tail.” Hob’s lap was abruptly full of a large, black Maine Coon cat.

“Silly duck! Even the non-physicists would have questions about your change in mass!”

“I want to support you in your work social functions, but this is ridiculous!” Hob sighed.

“Anya is coming over soon for babysitting, so why don’t we put it away for now? We can revisit it later, and maybe we’ll think of something in the meantime.”

“Yes, I will go and return when my duties are complete. Maybe I will find something in a dream that will work.” Dream sounded doubtful, but he still gave Hob a tender goodbye kiss before disappearing to his realm.

Hob sighed and went downstairs to greet Yor and Anya. The New Inn has been rented out for a birthday party, so he was going to babysit Anya upstairs at his place for the first time.

“Yor! Anya! Come on upstairs!” he greeted them when they arrived.

“Anya gets to see Hob’s flat!” Anya exclaimed with wonder in her voice.

“I’m sure it won’t be that exciting!” he chuckled, opening the door. Yor entered first, and he saw how thoroughly she inspected the room, while looking as though she was just glancing around. It must have passed muster, because she turned to Anya and gave her a hug.

“Have fun with Hob, Anya!” she said, leaving her with a smile and a little nod at Hob. Hob nodded back, smiling as he squatted to Anya’s level.

“Would you like to play Spy again today?” he asked. Spy was Anya’s favourite make-believe game.

“Today, Anya is an explorer! Anya wants to explore Hob’s flat!”

“Uhhh…” Hob had tidied up, of course, and child-proofed the most dangerous things (the cleaning fluids were on a high shelf in the closet instead of on the floor beside the toilet, for example), but he was sure a determined child like Anya could find something to get into. He’d have to watch her like a hawk!

“TV. Anya has a tv,” Anya began, walking around the living room. She passed the couch to stare at the bookshelves against the wall.

“Hob has a lot of books,” she declared.

“Um, yeah,” he agreed. “Some of them are quite old. Would you like to look at a book?” he hoped she would be amenable to letting him guide the choice of book. Some of his first editions weren’t really in condition for casual handling.

“What is that?” Anya pointed at the top shelf, way in the corner. Ah. Hob had gotten out his old plague doctor mask from storage, back in 2020. He hadn’t been able to help as much this time as in the past, due to licensing requirements for health care providers, but he had covered a few in-person lectures for his immunocompromised colleagues before admin got on board with the quarantine, and he’d handed out masks in the Tube before they they were required.

“Take this, it’ll save your life, mate.” It was a surreal time.

Hob handed the mask down to Anya, remembering the first time he had put it on. He’d survived the plague the first time, when most of his family died. He’d survived it again in the early 1500’s, while he was building his fortune. It had been easier that time, because the plague was always kinder to the rich than the poor. It was in 1665, while he was recovering from grief and from being drowned, that he donned the mask. If he wasn’t going to die, Hob had realized, there were so many lives he could save. Basic battlefield first aid got him started—give thirsty people water to drink. Put a blanket on them if they were chilled. Give them a damp rag if they were feverish. Clean their bodies as much as possible. So many people still died, but maybe not quite as many. Hob was grateful for each one who had recovered.

“Hob did not die for a long time,” Anya came out with, looking quizzically at him with the mask in her hands. Oh, shit. He hadn’t meant to give away that secret; he’d forgotten she was a telepath in the rush of memories. He looked her steadily in the eyes.

“Your papa has a secret, and your mama has a secret.” Anya had told him so the first time she met Dream. She hadn’t told him what the secret was, but Hob could guess, based on how extremely competent and dangerous her parents were.

“You have a secret,” she nodded in agreement, a serious look on her little face, “and I have a secret too,” Hob finished.

“Dream has a secret too,” Anya pointed out. “Franky and Uncle Yuri also.” Hob just nodded. He so did not want to open that can of worms!

“Time to explore again!” Anya suddenly announced, putting the plague mask down on the coffee table. She headed down the hall, Hob darting after her with, he had to admit, some trepidation in his heart. He hadn’t really planned on her seeing the bedroom. He’d better check it first, before she poked her nose in.

Hob stuck his nose in the bedroom, seeing with relief that it was fairly tidy and didn’t have any child-unfriendly things lying around. He turned to try to head her off anyway, only to see that it was already too late. Instead of aiming for the bedroom, she had opened the hall closet where he’d stuffed his dangerous items, and there she was, holding the hilt of his great sword, which was taller than she was. Hob winced and gently took it from her.

“How about we go explore in the park?” He suggested, determinedly turning his thoughts away from all the people he’d killed with that sword, and the times he’d nearly been killed himself, as he stowed it away again.

“Yes! Anya wants to explore the park!” She grabbed his hand enthusiastically, barely slowing down to put her shoes on as they headed outside.

Hob made sure she stopped to check for traffic before crossing the road, then sauntered after her as she dashed through the park, weaving around the few people who were also out enjoying it. She came to a halt as she spotted a raven in the grass, and crouched low to approach it, a crafty expression on her face. Ah, playing Spy again, Hob thought. The raven hopped toward the tree, then suddenly took off to caw at her from its branches.

“Anya is an explorer!” Anya proclaimed to the red-haired man sitting against the base of the tree.

“I’m a bit of an explorer too,” he confessed, patting his little bundle, which was tied to a stick like an old time hobo. Hob felt strangely at ease with him, even though he couldn’t have said why he felt familiar. Perhaps they’d met before.

“You have a secret too,” Anya disclosed. The man raised his eyebrows, glancing at Hob.

“Ah, Anya, most people do have secrets, you know. It’s generally not polite to ask about them, unless you really need to know, or if someone is not safe. In that case you should really tell a grown up…” Hob trailed off as he realized the other two were ignoring him. The stranger was being submitted to Anya’s piercing gaze, the one where it seemed she could read your soul. She didn’t break the gaze first, he did.

“You should probably ask my brother if you want to know my secrets, Hob. We have met, you know. It was very long ago. In fact, it was your memories today which drew me here.”

“You’re not the one he calls the Prodigal, are you?” Hob wondered, making connections in his head. Dream had a lot of siblings, and they were all remarkable. The man smiled brilliantly.

“I am! You can call me Joe.”

“It’s nice to meet….” Hob started, but Anya was interrupting, grabbing Joe’s hand.

“Anya wants a story! Tell me about exploring!” she demanded. Joe nodded.

“Well, there was this one day I was wandering with my dog, Barnabas,” he began.

“Anya knows Barnabas! He came here before!” Anya interrupted.

“Did he? That’s nice! So, Barnabas and I…” Hob settled in for a good story, hoping it would last until Yor returned.

Later that day, having said goodbye to Joe, Anya and Yor, Hob trudged up to his flat and flopped on the couch. His eyes fell on the plague mask, still sitting on the coffee table, and he was stuck by inspiration. Just then, Dream appeared.

“Hello, Hob,” he smiled as Hob moved to give him room on the couch.

“I met your brother today!” Hob revealed, “and I think I know what to do for your Halloween costume!”

Two weeks later, Hob and Dream were standing outside the faculty Halloween party. Hob had recreated his plague doctor outfit, and Dream was wearing his helm and robe, toned-down a bit on Hob’s advice. Dream was having second thoughts.

“Don’t worry, Duck, it will be fine,” Hob reassured him, taking him by the hand and drawing him gently into the party room. Five minutes later, they were at the refreshments table when an elaborate Big Ben Hob didn’t know came up to them.

“Excellent plague doctor mask!” she enthused. “It looks so authentic!”

“Thank you!” Hob answered, loving how willing people were to see what they expected to see.

“And you!” she turned excitedly to Dream, “I love your mask! Where did you get it?”

“I created it from the skull and spine of my enemy, who I crushed with my own hands,” Dream intoned in his most ominous voice.

“Brilliant! Great backstory! I love how you commit to the bit!” she gushed.

“Hob?” Dream whined.

“Don’t worry, love, you’re doing excellently,” Hob consoled him as they walked further into the party, once again holding hands.

Read previous: Butterflies

Read from the beginning: Space Buns

Read next: Secrets

Why I call Destruction Joe (or Not Joe).

[princess-viola]

when i was a kid, i wanted a GBA so badly to play pokémon on but i never got one ever for either my birthday or christmas so instead i just ended up pirating the game and playing it on an emulator on my computer lol

btw i think the reason why i never got one is cause they (my grandparents) wouldn't have been able to control it. cause i had an n64 (got it in 2000 for either my 4th birthday that year or christmas, don't 100% remember which) but it was hooked up to the living room TV so they could control when i got to play (been years but from my memories it was like: on weekdays after i did my homework, i could play as much as i wanted between 5pm and 7pm [grandparents liked to watch dr phil and judge judy which aired between 3pm and 5pm and at 7pm we'd watch wheel of fortune and then jeopardy] and, on weekends/days off school, i had basically unlimited play time). but if i had a GBA, that's a handheld and they couldn't exactly control my play time with that like they could with something hooked up to the TV

[mercuriale]

Reclaiming hardware Pt. 1: Wii U

Been a while since i last sat down and wrote out a post.

In the last 12 or so months I have been installing custom firmware on some older gaming devices i own but have fallen out of use. I had experimented with CFW on my WIi U maybe about 2 years ago with Tiramisu. A year later i scored a second-hand Vita, and just this last week I've been giving the CFW treatment to my 3DS, as well as updating my Wii U to the Aroma environment, and reviving an old R4 DS flashcart.

I have a few core beliefs with this kind of practice.

If you own a piece of hardware you can do what you want with it.

If a game is not made available to purchase legally or easily, at a reasonable price, it is ethically fine to pirate it.

Nintendo in particular can absolutely take the hit. After all, they're barely being kept afloat by one guy they cruelly saddled with millions in damages.

This post is a brief recount of my experiences modding, and i hope that by describing the problems and solutions i found along the way, I can help others.

Here are my experiences so far, per hardware.

Pt. 1: Wii U

I have a mega soft spot for the Wii U. It walked so the Switch could run, and being able to play full console game on the gamepad while someone else can watch TV in the same room is a really great aspect. The library is also absolutely killer; Bayonetta 2, Super Mario 3D World, Wonderful 101, Xenoblade Chronicles X, on top of the entire Wii library make this a fantastic box to mod. Compared to the effort needed to put in, you can end up with a console that can play the entire Wii U, Wii, and Gamecube libraries, plus Retroarch and other emulators for most older consoles.

I originally had Tiramisu installed but have upgraded to Aroma. I followed the wiiu.hacks.guide guide but sometimes these guides tend to gloss over details in the process that i would say are important.

What the guide doesn't explain, conceptually, is the concept of an environment, and the difference between Tiramisu (old) and Aroma (new, beta). I'll try to do so in layman's terms here.

Tiramisu is the previous established CFW Environment, and all side-loaded homebrew apps need to be launched through the Homebrew Launcher, which gets launched in-place of the Mii Maker app, and installed by other homebrew apps like WUPInstaller.

Aroma is a new Environment, and it enables apps to be added to the native Wii U Menu rather than having to use the HB Launcher. It also simplifies sideloading apps by establishing a new filetype, the .wuhb file. These can be copied to the sd:\wiiu\apps folder on the SD card, rather than using an installer app.

Upgrading from Tiramisu to Aroma is actually very simple. If you already had Tiramisu, all that you need to do is download the Aroma files from the official site and unzip them to the root of the SD card, merging them together into one sd:\wiiu folder. Then perform the exploit as described in the guide. You only need the .zip files in the Base and Aroma headings on the page, the additional plugins and modules are optional and you can come back to those later.

When performing the browser exploit, you have to hold the B button. Yes, keep holding. it takes approximately 1 minute, and you'll be on a white screen if all is going correctly. keep holding until the screen changes to white text on black, and asks you to choose your payload. run nanddumper and do your due diligence.

When you run the browser exploit the second time you have to hold X instead of B this time, and it will start the environment loader. Pick Aroma. At this point you can press Y and it will highlight it yellow, making it your preferred. A bright yellow warning will get thrown up on the screen regarding blocking updates. It looks scary but if you read it carefully, youll see that you can block system updates by pressing X. Press it.

the step regarding the PayloadLoader app can be skipped in my instance, as i had already set it up to run on boot automatically.

If you want to change environments with the above config (i.e. to tiramisu instead to run Retroarch), you need to hold X on boot. I wish this could be displayed briefly on boot, like with a PC to access the BIOS. This is very easy to forget when you have over 12 months between boots! I should also add that by "boot" i mean when the Wii U Menu is loading. if you start the console with the GamePad and have quick start enabled, you need to hold X right after you choose Wii U Menu in the bottom right corner.

Another handy file to have is sigpatches in the wiiu\environments\aroma\modules\setup folder.

There exists an app to download games directly. I already have a good physical Wii U Catalog, but you can install NUSspli to download games directly. Officially my advice is to only download games you already own. However, Wii U games are difficult to find for obvious reasons, especially niche cult games that aren't the usual Wii fodder for kids like Bayonetta 2 or Xenoblade Chronicles X. If you want to buy physical in any condition you'll pay an arm and a leg, if you can find anything decent at all. At time of writing neither of the above games are available on any other platform. By cross-referencing these facts with my beliefs mentioned above, you may be able to draw a conclusion for yourself. Forewarning, downloads are a bit on the slow side, and you have to have the app open the entire time. luckily for you, you can just switch over to your tv and watch something like i did, while keeping an eye on your gamepad.

Don't run the Health and Safety Information app once you've booted up your Wii U. if you've configured your PayloadLoader to automatically start on boot, its done. If you run it again, you'll be told off for running the EnvironmentLoader twice, and you'll need to hard power off your console and gamepad, which i've had to do more times than i'm wliling to admit.

I'll end this guide by confessing: I spent a lot of money in this era on this console. I don't regret it; I was living comfortably and could afford to at the time. It was fun to completely tune out what was happening for other consoles, and live in relative bliss with PC ports and the quality output for the Nintendo range at the time. It was fun to be hopeful and optimistic for the Wii U when so many others had already written it off completely.

Looking back now, the games lineup now that all is said and done is really quite fantastic; there looms an unfortunate shadow over it all though; many of the Wii U's best games have been rereleased for the Switch, having been expanded and improved even further, most notably Smash and Mario Kart 8, but the wii U versions are still great. It has the only Tekken game to appear on an Nintendo console. Bayonetta 2 and XCX are still wholly exclusive. Theres lots to like here. My hope and optimism were, to me, repaid in kind.

Thats about all I have so far for this thing. I plan to wade into the murky waters of gamecube games in the future, so i may yet write about my trials in that area. In the meantime, I'm having plenty of fun playing WarioLand 4 on a deliciously large screen.

[fumagus]

Honestly in regard to last post, this is why I'm sometimes like "Don't even pirate it" even if I'm pro-piracy. I only save piracy for media that's literally difficult to find or not even available in my native language (especially talking about older anime before it went mainstream or 30-year-old games for the PS1 or SNES that have never been ported or translated), or is heavily censored (particularly the dumb shit they used to do with 4kids shows or with spongebob skipping episodes and scenes for overdone reasons), or is difficult to watch in one place (such as the Pokemon series, which is spread out across too many platforms to count, or, better yet, if you want to watch it subbed).

This is also why I want to tell people to not even pirate things made by nasty ideals such as being anti-Palestine, transphobic, antisemitic, anti-Black, and what have you. Or if you actually want to strike against the shows due to workplace abuse, anti-consumer-friendliness, or use of AI.

Because at the end of the day, these large platforms and their shows still win in away by taking your time away from smaller producers who may benefit from you watching their show instead of something heavily advertised by Netflix, even if you're still doing it for free. These companies care just as much about making money as much as they are trying to leave a cultural footprint. And pirating the most recent season of Stranger Things or the latest superhero movie, and then talking about it might as well be free advertising to them, in regards to others who don't know how to pirate, don't want to risk pirating, or already have a Netflix they don't care about cancelling. Even if these companies can and will stop pirates of their favorite shows and shit on their fans.

Even if you aren't paying these disgusting corporations with your money, you're still paying with your time.

So instead consider choosing to watch an obscure movie or TV show made by or featuring minorities vs a more popular one featuring or made by cishet, abled, white bigots or push tired tropes in regard to minorities.

Or choosing an obscure show or video game that's obviously a labor of love by a very small group of people vs a more popular, overfunded one that was either the product of crunch or AI to cut corners.

Or choosing a more obscure show and movie on youtube or game on Itchio that's free, if not consumer-friendly, to begin with vs more popular, overfunded media where you're only getting it for free by pirating it.

[llycaons]

this is a fine show but apple keeping a stranglehold on their stuff just means that fewer people are going to even want to watch it, not to mention be able to. community and fandoms are a huge reason why shows become and stay popular. the only reason I know about this is because a blogger whose taste I trust mentioned it offhand, and then the difficulty of finding it anywhere made me want to watch it out of spite. but fucking...nobody has apple tv. I can't think of a single other show on apple tv besides dickinson. and mythic quest would probably be doing a lot better if it was allowed to play on other streaming sites. and if we could pirate it easier lmao. studios have this entire crusade against piracy, but that legitimately brings in so many people, which is only a benefit to them. instead it's just me and my thoughts on this sterile white macbook-style website

[trexy225]

So! I feel like people who have been around a while wonder how I write so much. And honestly I have no idea but I can try and guess. This is basically me trying to figure out why and how I write so much 😃

I feel like it’s a combined force of spite, wanting to tell my stories, organization, and comments from people that keep me going. I’ve always been a creative person and it wasn’t until recently that I got back into writing. I use it as a coping mechanism and instead of lashing out at people or you know focusing on the negativity in my life, I channel all my creative (and frustrated) energy into my writing. So honestly when you can see me updating a lot, something is going on haha. I’m extremely busy and it’s hard to find time to write, usually I will open up my laptop and jot down like 100-500 words when I have a spare five minutes. I’ve started to write in composition notebooks and I’m able to write more if I have like a minute so I have several chapters written that I just gotta write down on my google docs lol. Usually write during the weekends, lunch, and at night but tbh sometimes I just don’t have energy. I just have a lot of energy and I finally found a way to channel what I have.

I also write for my readers, not just myself. When I was at a super dark time when I was younger, I used reading fanfiction as an outlet. (Not sure if it helped or made things worse Imma choose the first option) and I know that everyone is struggling. I hope that my fics can make someone’s day and show them that they’re not alone. I’ve always had positive intentions and I hope that it’s been reflected in my writing.

NOW I think that how I organize and format my writing also plays a huge role in it, I have a fic template that I use and it helps me plot out my ideas. Basically I figure out what I want the ending to be and I write an outline. And then I write ^^. If I’m unable to figure out what to write, I will use a wheel of names or look at the ones that I didn’t update recently. Usually I try to do like a cycle of updating but I’ve decided to just write whichever fics I feel like writing. All of my WIPS have endings, and that means that imma finish it. Sometimes I run out of steam but in the end, I always want to finish my fics. I have many fics that I’m working on the outline and just basic stuff that I’ve been working on in the background.

I also use several methods to start writing when I have time. A lot of things I’ve learned from writing accounts on insta and tumblr. I am always working on this writers toolbox with vocab and how to write certain things, if anyone wants that hmu. However it’s a huge WIP and it’s not complete. I work on it when there’s time to do things but I don’t feel like writing. Some things I do to start writing is write three sentences, change the weather, change the POV, write a different part, go back to a finished fic and rewrite a chapter, ask for constructive criticism, look at comments and also Fanart for inspiration. For my AU’s sometimes I will watch movies and TV shows, like for POYW I’ll watch little mermaid and princess movies or for Kraken’s Callin’ I’ll watch Treasure Planet and the pirates of the Caribbean or OFMD. For stranded I’ll watch horror survival movies and so on and so on the list goes on forever.

If anyone has any questions pls ask, I love to help ^^ I’m an amateur and I’m learning new things everyday. But at the end of the day, I love to write and I’m always working to be better and at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.

(Might update this as life goes on idk I’m so busy)

Ok slay bye bye

[weirdmageddon]

i know it doesnt seem that way on the surface but once you do some digging and thinking?? bill cipher is kind of a tragic character. hes like a trillion year old kid who could just never learn a lesson because nobody was able to level with him in a way he could appreciate before he became unbearable. there’s a lot of unsaid angst in this character thats rearing its little ass up on the outskirts of the canon show.

Sixty degrees that come in threes. Watches from within birch trees. Saw his own dimension burn. Misses home and can’t return. Says he’s happy. He’s a liar. Blame the arson for the fire. If he wants to shirk the blame, he’ll have to invoke my name. One way to absolve his crime. A different form, a different time.

— Axolotl’s poem, Dipper and Mabel and the Curse of the Time Pirates' Treasure!: Select Your Own Choose-Venture

LITTLE TIP FROM SOMEONE WHO'S BEEN AROUND THE BLOCK- "TRUTH" IS A TATTLETALE WITH NO FRIENDS. "TRUTH" IS YOUR ANNOYING UNCLE WHO SPOILS THE MOVIE. "TRUTH" IS A CONCEPT INVENTED BY POWERFUL LIARS TO GUILT YOU INTO GIVING THEM MORE POWER. DONT FALL FOR THE TRAP. LIE UNTIL WHAT YOU WANT TO BE TRUE BECOMES TRUE. LIE UNTIL YOU CANT REMEMBER WHATS A LIE AND WHAT ISNT. LIE UNTIL YOU ARENT LYING ANYMORE

— Bill, Reddit AMA

“Alex, why is Bill lying about being happy?” Um, y’know… for courtesy.

— Alex Hirsch, Alex & Dana Charity Draw-A-Thon

If you think Stan’s relationship with his family is bad, Bill’s is worse.

— Alex Hirsch, NYCC 2015

Mabel, on the other hand—her, I like. ‘Fun’ is just another way of saying CHAOS, and I’m the master of that!

— Bill, Dipper’s and Mabel’s Guide to Mystery and Nonstop Fun

My concept is that Bill genuinely believes that Mabel’s kind of like him. He sees Mabel as a chaos agent… she’s a little bit selfish, she likes to have fun at whatever cost. And Bill is all those things times a billion. So he thinks when he lays it all out for her, like “How about, instead of being lame, you do something fun! And crush whoever you want in the process!” He thinks that’s going to go over. And, uh, he’s not wrong in seeing that side in Mabel, but— but Mabel is a better person than Bill Cipher.

— Alex Hirsch, commentary on Sock Opera from the complete series boxset

Why is Bill so mad at the world? I think there’s a lot of people where you can ask, “Why are they so mad at the world?” I think Bill is angry at the world for the same reason that anyone sometimes can get mad at the world. Everyone has days where they don’t get their way, where you have to go to bed early or you have too much homework to do or you can’t eat the candy that you want or you miss your favorite TV show and, in those moments, you just want to tear the whole world down.

Bill is a character who has been around for countless billions of eons, but he hasn’t grown up in that time. He’s a character who has accumulated many frustrations, many moments of destruction like that, and they’ve built up over time. Now he’s decided that he wants a world where there is no homework, where there is no bedtime—where you can eat any candy you want, and you can do anything you want. But because he is such a crazy guy, when he does anything he wants, it turns out to be terrifying. So I think little frustrations over thousands of years have built him into a sort of spoiled brat. And he takes it out on the world, and it’s up to our heroes to finally teach him some rules.

— Alex Hirsch, AV Club interview

it just really gets you thinking about him (these all link to different analysis posts)

theres a feeling of fleeting pensive sadness about bill. yes he deserves punishment. but it just feels like it didnt need to happen in the first place. if he had someone he could be open about his vulnerabilities to so that he doesn’t have to lie about being happy. or someone who could’ve advised and righted him in an unobtrusive way so that he had a large degree of freedom but was still being guided to grow in a positive direction. from just these glimpses you cant help but ask “what happened to you?”

whatever the “different form, different time” entails, he’s going to need someone who can immediately read past his bullshit but be tactful and patient with him about it in order for him grow into a better person.