#I know what I had done wrong but none of it was done out of malice - I truly was just a very weak broken-brained person

[petew21-blog]

Bodysitting gone wrong

I thought that the site had only verified sitters. Imagine my surprise when I found out my body had disappeared. He didn't answer any of my calls and even blocked me ony the Bodysitting site. I contacted the support, but they said they need some proof of violation of the contract.

Let me just make it clear to you. I am a manager for a big company. My work life is stressful as it is. Me and my wife just had our first baby and I swear I love them both, but I just can't stand it. I needed to get some rest for a while. Until my colleague suggested a Bodysitting site. Where verified strangers can agree to swap life with you for some financial ammount and pretend to be you. You either continue their life or if you pay up you can do whatever you want. Which was exactly what I wanted.

I set up a profile a submitted my photo. Because of my muscular torso and probably even the dick size and wife I mentioned, the request kept flowing in.

I eventually choose Rick here. He was young, handsome and even here in the same city, so if anything happened I could always come by. We had a whole conversation where he would ask me details about my life, work, wife everything. He really wanted to be good as me.

The swap was instant. I was suddenly in a small apartement on the edge of the city.

I think I chose perfectly. I can even get a date in this body.

As I said before, I really love my life. But we haven't had sex for such a long time. You have to understand.

Back to present

I got a call of thepossible whereabouts of the location of my body. Yeah, I have to be honest. I was horrified when I arrived there. The place was a gay club. But not one of those "sweet" bars. But a pub for those leather fuckers.

I entered and all eyes were on me. Fuck, I didn't realise that this kid is exactly who they want.

But they I saw my body coming out of the bathroom. I wouldn't almost recognise it if it weren't for the beard.

"What the hell have you done?!?"

"Oh hey, that's a face I didn't expect to see so soon. Want something to drink?"

"No, I want you to explain to my why you did everythig we agreed not to do. You got me tatooed, got my nipples pierced and please tell me that's not a mohawk under that hat?"

"You know what, you don't have to worry about that anymore. I know how you were unhappy with your life, so I decied to give you a present. You can keep the body. Great right?"

"What do you mean keep the body? What have you done with my life?"

"Well. Your wife kind of figured out I'm not you the second night after she caught me in the shower fingering your butt. I explained to her and I think you shouldn't get near her any time soon. Anyway none of this matters. I deleted the profile, so there is no going back if there aren't both of the original profiles that made the deal."

"I'm gonna kill you!" I jumped at him, but in a second I was pressed against the wall with a hand on my neck.

"Look, either you leave and nothing happens to you. Or me and the boys here can show why not to threaten any of us. So, what you wanna do?"

I obviously left. What was I suppose to do? He would beat me up, rape me or even kill me. I contacted the support and even their number was blocked now. Amazing. I hope my wife is into twinks

[sunflower-lilac42]

✧ 𝐀𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 || mat barzal ♔

summary: after forgetting to text his girlfriend about where he was going, she get's a little anxious that he finally got tired of her

warnings: cheating/allusions to cheating, feelings, mat being too hot for his own good (i'm sorry)

publish date: 05/19/24

notes: i've been writing this fic for so long and i am so happy that it's finally done! look at me on a writing kick. i hope this continues throughout the summer for all of you, because i love giving you guys fics! anyway (as always), thank you for reading my fics and i hope to see you all in the next one <3 | add yourself to the taglist ➺ taglist!

nhl masterlist | main masterlist

It felt stupid for her to feel this way. Mat hadn’t done anything wrong to make her feel like this, to make her feel like he was cheating. He had always told her where he was going, he always invited her out with his friends after big wins, and he face-timed her every night while he was on the road. He was perfect for her. Yet, her mind had never been nice to her.

It seemed like her mind’s favorite thing to do was to play tricks on her, from remembering little details from her childhood to overthinking whether or not she left the straightener on. It never stopped, it only got quiet for a brief few moments before reappearing. Her past experiences hadn’t helped her mind's incessant ideas.

When she started dating Charlie, she was desperate for love, desperate for someone to love her, so she fell for the first guy who paid any attention to her. And he used it to his advantage. They had been dating for about 9 months when she found out he had been cheating for 6 of them. Her heart, and mind, were never the same after that. 

Meeting Mat did wonders for her, she felt like she was finally allowing herself to be happy. And then the thoughts came and never left. The thoughts that he was going out after games just to meet up with some girl, that on roadies he was finding someone better than her to fulfill his need. Deep down she knew none of this was true, that Mat was as loyal as they came. But once again, that never stopped her mind.

It was playoff time, he was going back and forth between his home and Raleigh. After tonight, she knew that he would want to go out but the text never came. The text that always told her that he was going to the bar or the club, the text that asked her if she wanted to go with him even when knowing the answer was a ‘no’, the text that said he loved her and he would be home to cuddle her as soon as he could.

This wouldn’t have been the first time he had forgotten to text and normally, she wouldn’t have reacted like this. It was different for some reason this time, in a way that she was panicking more, overthinking more, and sweating more. It just felt different for her. 

When he got home, he blindly threw his keys on the counter and started to take off his jacket as he called out, “Baby? I’m home.”

His shirt was unbuttoned at the top and a little wrinkled, his hair messy and a little sweat dripped from his forehead. He looked into the living room and furrowed his brows in confusion when he realized his girlfriend wasn’t sitting there. He went to move to the bedroom but then he heard her footsteps softly patter down the hallway. 

He smiled when she came into view, wrapped in one of her cardigans and the sleeves pulled over her hands, dressed in her leggings and one of his old t-shirts with slippers on her feet. But, his smile was quickly wiped when he realized she wasn’t mirroring his expression. 

“What’s wrong?”

“Where were you?”

He was taken aback by the harshness of her tone. He didn’t think he had done anything, he had just gone out like he- oh. That’s when he realized, mid-thought, playing back his entire day from when he got up, to when he left, to now. He looked at her, guilt written all over his face, “I am so so so sorry baby. I know I forgot to text, I feel horrible.”

She raised an eyebrow, an unsettling feeling forming in her stomach. While everything in her told her to trust him, she just couldn’t and she hated herself for it. Mat stared at her, unsure of what to say or what to do, and then she spoke, “Where were you?”

“I was at the bar, with some of the guys. You know, celebrating the win.”

She tightened her grip on her sleeves and looked him up and down before turning away and going to sit on the couch. Mat tilted his head a little to the left to show his confusion before ultimately shrugging it off and going to take another shower.

While he showered, she sat there, staring at the TV as thoughts raced through her head. Had he really just been out with the guys or was that just a cover story? Was this the first time he did it? Was there another girl? Stop, y/n. Mat is perfect, Mat loves you, Mat is amazing, Mat wants to be with you. She took a deep breath before reaching for her book and starting to read. 

Mat came out a little bit later, shaking his hair rid of water as he walked down the hallway. He sat next to her on the couch and furrowed his eyebrows once again when she scooted away from him. He attempted to place his hand onto her thigh but she just pushed it away, trying to bury her face further into her book. He now frowned, even more confused as to what was going on, “What’s wrong baby?” 

She turned away from him, shaking her head. There was no need to bother him with her ‘stupid’ thoughts. Her actions made him even more sad, getting up to kneel in front of her and raising his hand to lightly grip her chin between his thumb and his index finger to guide her head so she was now looking at him. However, she casted her eyes downwards, too embarrassed to meet his eyes. 

“Hey, look at me.”

As soon as she lifted her gaze and met his, her cheeks flushed a bright pink. She attempted to look back down again but Mat just clicked his tongue, tsking. Forcing herself to keep his gaze, she continued to fiddle with the ends of her cardigan. Mat moved his hand, brushing her cheek with his thumb, “Talk to me.”

She didn’t say anything for a few minutes, trying to look anywhere but at him. And every time her gaze drifted, Mat would bring it right back to him. Finally, she spoke, “It’s nothing.” 

Her voice was the softest he had ever heard, he had to lean in to hear her a little better. He shook his head when her words finally clicked in his head, “I know there’s something, y/n/n. Please, just tell me.”

“I had this ex…”

He took a deep breath in, nervous about where this conversation was going to go. His free hand flexed before coming to rest on her thigh and this time she didn’t protest the touch. She copied his deep breath and then stared at him, “He cheated on me. And I know you would never do that but you didn’t text and I just thought-”

“Hey, breathe baby. It’s okay. I’m not mad at you.”

“You’re not?”

“No of course not, honey. There is absolutely no reason for me to be mad at you. I understand.”

His thumb rubs small circles on her thigh and she slightly tenses at the movement before relaxing again. She nodded and leaned into his hand that still sat on her cheek, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

She shrugged, “For being clingy. I don't want you to have to feel like you have to text me every time you go out without me.”

He leaned up and kissed her head, “It’s no big deal. If it makes you comfortable and safe I will go out of my way every time to do it.”

She gave him a small smile, “I love you.”

“I love you, now come on. I think I deserve some game-winning cuddles.”

She giggled as Mat dragged her into their bedroom, “I guess.”

“Hey!”

𝑴𝑰𝑺𝑪𝑬𝑳𝑳𝑨𝑵𝑬𝑶𝑼𝑺 𝑷𝑳𝑨𝒀𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻 ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

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[raynewolfegirl]

Meta Jazz, the Arkham Intern Therapist Pt 2.2

Note: Part 2.2! The Bane Incident from Kon's POV! 😁

~*~*~

Two days later, Kon was back at Arkham undercover again. The Bats had caught Bane nearly 12 hours earlier after Red Hood showed up midway through the fight, lept off the overpass, and landed a blow directly to the top of Bane's head with a metal pipe on the way down. The behemoth of a man had crashed hard into the cement, immediately unconscious, and been taken directly to Arkham's medical facilities as soon as he arrived. He'd been checked over and cleared to head to his usual room in less than 15 minutes once he woke up the following afternoon.

Kon found out all of this afterwards. 

He was headed back to the briefing room for his nect assignment after lunch when he spotted four senior guards, Collins, Ryans, Dorr, and Miles, escorting Bane from medical to his usual cell. He stepped into a doorway to let them pass by before continuing on his way. Kon had spent a productive lunch break chatting with Jasmine "please don't call me Fenton" while she waited for Dr. Rylie before he had to head back to the guards room so he wouldn't be late. He'd have to make sure to catch up with Dr. Rylie on the way out at the end of the day instead, Kon mused.

There was a shout behind him. Two bodies slamming hard into the walls on either side of the hall. A rush of fabric sliding across fabric. Rapid pounding footsteps.

Kon spun letting out a gasp as he saw Bane grab Jasmine's upper arm and yank her hard enough to make her stumble. The large man turned to face the guards behind him as he pulled her firmly back against his chest. Kon had the dart gun in his hands and leveled at Bane before he even realized he was moving. Dorr and Ryans had also already done the same. Miles was scrambling to his feet, drawing both his dart gun and baton. Collins slid to the ground, right shoulder visibly dislocated from hitting the wall at the wrong angle but he drew his tranquilizer dart gun as well.

"Weapons down or I'll snap her skinny little neck." Bane growled out, shaking Jasmine as emphasis. Her braid swung from the force of it. 

Kon expected her to panic. He was panicking; a full grown, fully recognized superhero. Of course, he expected her to panic.

But Jasmine didn't. 

Her expression smoothed out turning from barely-there surprise to blank calm in the span of a few seconds. Her breathing stayed deep and even. Her heart beat steady was steady. Was she in some kind of shock? But he had never heard of someone reacting like that to shock before.

"Back up! Let him through!" Dr. Rylie shouted to Kon and the other guards from where he had pressed himself against the wall on the opposite side from Bane. He must have been just a few steps ahead of Jasmine.

"She's my student! Let him through!" Dr. Rylie screamed again. His voice high pitched with fear for his intern. 

Kon didn't know what to do. From the way Ryans and Dorr were exchanging looks, he wasn't sure they knew what the best approach was in this situation either. Of the five of them, Ryans was the most senior guard but he wasn't one of the six guards trained for hostage negotiations either. None of the scenarios they had trained for would work here. Jasmine was too similar in height to Bane for a good shot and a single tranquilizer wouldn't knock him out anyway. They couldn't possibly circle around behind him in this narrow hallway either.

Kon could practically taste the panic building in the air. The tension was rising. If he didn't think fast someone else was going to make the first move and Jasmine would get hurt and -

She sighed.

Long, heavy, and disappointed. It felt like every muscle in Kon's body locked up suddenly.

"Mr. Bane, remove your hands from my person, please. I will give you to one to comply." She said voice calm and heavy like - like she was disappointed in him?

Kon's stared at her bland expression in shock for a moment before his eyes darted back to Bane. The rogue looked momentarily stunned then started laughing.

"Five." Jasmine said, ignoring his laughter. Kon felt himself paling. His colleagues were shifting, white faced with fear as they traded glances again.

"Four." She continued. Bane snorted derisively at her.

"Did you really think that would work?" He asked. His arms tightened around her. There was no way Jasmine was getting out of this without bruises.

"Three." She said ignoring Bane's question. Holy shit. Had she lost her mind?

"What can you even do if I don't?" Bane mocked with a rabid gleam in his eye. He's going to kill her, Kon realized faintly, even if we let him go now he's going to snap her neck for this.

"Two." 

"Jasmine..." Kon whispered pained and horrified by his realization. Loosening his grip on the dart gun without meaning too. She met his gaze across the hall, eyes resolved. 

"One." She finished, brows furrowing slightly in concentration as her lips thinned, pressed together. Bane gave a derisive snort. 

And then the massive man was airborne. 

"Holy shit." Miles breathed out.

Kon stared at the crater in the floor. Collins and Dorr were absolutely silent, hearts racing in their chests. Ryans took a half step forward, heart stuttering - Kon really hoped the man wasn't about to have a heart attack because he could rush him to medical right now. Dr. Rylie was half collapsed against the wall he'd been pressing himself against a strangled sound of shock coming from his throat. Bane was embedded in the floor breath wheezing as Jasmine half knelt on top of his neck. Oh wow, Kon registered, Bane's arm is fucked.

"Now, do you know what you've done wrong?" Jasmine asked looking down at the giant.

"Yes, Ma'am." Bane choked out.

"Fucked with the wrong HBIC." Collins muttered under his breath faintly still stunned.

"Jasmine for president." Miles whispered back automatically.

"Boys," Dorr scolded as he half lowered his dart gun, shifting his weight at the same time.

"Won't be making her angry around that time of month." Ryans mumbled to himself softly enough that Kon was the only person who could have possibly heard him. 

"What did you do wrong?" Jasmine pressed. Collins choked back an inappropriate hysterical giggle at the question. Bane appeared to panic when he realized he'd have to respond. 

No wonder, Kon thought, the man literally grew up in Santa Prisca's prisons. Did he even know how to respond to -Kon choked on air - a maternal scolding?! What the ever loving fuck? He bluescreened. Stood there in the hallway, absolutely stunned, completely unaware of his surroundings as he struggled to process the fact that Jasmine was giving Bane a maternal scolding in the middle of an Arkham hallway right in front of him. Maybe I've finally gone nuts? Kon wondered. 

Jasmine gestured vaguely towards the group of them without turning to look and Kon snapped back to the present. 

"Kyle here is going to take you to see the nurse and then back to your room then. I'm sure you'll behave for him?" Oh shit, that's me she's talking about. Kon walked towards her still a bit numb.

"Yes, Ma'am. I'll behave." Bane answered her. Kon watched as Jasmine stood up carefully and backed away from Bane far enough for him to pull himself out of the crater in the floor. Once he was on his feet, Kon led Bane back towards medical realizing as he did that there had been four other guards behind him this whole time.

Two of them darted forward and scooped up Collins, probably to take him to the guards medical ward along the outer wall patrol route. The other two fell in with Kon, Dorr, Miles, and Ryans. As they walked away Kon could hear Jasmine talking to Dr. Rylie.

"I'm fine, really. My mother was an extremely skilled martial artist. I've been learning from her since I started to walk." She explained honestly, trying to sooth the frazzled doctor's nerves. "I didn't know he was heavy enough to break the floor though!" Jasmine laughed. 

That - heart beat uneven, vocal cords tense - that second part was a lie.

[gauntletqueen]

isn't banning people based on "vibes" a conservative way of thinking? Idk I feel like forcibly removing people in your community who didn't do anything based on your idea on what's normal & fear that they COULD be dangerous is a justification for alot of right wing politicians & a basis behind xenaphobia.

Its literally a talking point of our oppressors.

First off there's something funny to me about seeing me retweet something on twitter and then going to my tumblr to respond to it anonymously

Second off, you're making big assumptions on what these vibes might be and what reasons streamers and other online creatives might have for removing people.

Here's some examples of people I've banned from my community discord server based on vibes:

Someone who only ever cared about talking to me, and never acknowledging anyone else in the server. They acted far too familiar with me despite me not knowing them, and continuously sent me DMs where they roleplayed things like hugging me. I explained why all of this behavior was not appreciated but they never listened. Classic parasocial behavior but none of it was against the rules. I still removed them based on vibes because they made everyone, especially myself, very uncomfortable and would not listen when told to stop.

A user who made everything about themself. They would derail every conversation to talk about something they did, often unrelated to the current topic, talk over others to praise themself on something, never listen to other people, interrupt others to talk about how they would've done something better, etc. Not against the rules! But it sure is annoying! I removed them because they constantly brought the mood down by making others feel like they had no place to speak.

Multiple users who only spread negativity. Almost always taking worst faith stances on things, barging into perfectly fine conversations with some overly negative angle all the time, sometimes I'd tell them to stop and they'd say it's just for fun, but it's not very fun when all you accomplish is ruining the mood, is it?

Any time something like this happens, Me and my mods make sure to take the person aside in DMs and explain the situation first, make it clear to them what they're doing wrong, and how we'd like them to stop, and if we still remove them then, it's their own fault. There have been plenty of times where someone was told to stop a certain behavior, and they understood and corrected accordingly.

I'm not removing these people because I suspect they might be secretly right-wing, or phobic, or whatever you're assuming when you say "dangerous", I remove them because they're annoying and don't listen, and I don't want annoying people like that in a simple little discord community that I made for people who like what I do to hang out with each other and have a good time. I have to manage that community and if there's too many problems that becomes hard, and it'll just be a less nice place to be. It's not that deep.

[trueebeauty]

RUIN ME - GOJO SATORU

Does it hurt?

Of course, it does.

Being forced to watch someone else have everything you want... everything you need... everything they knew you desperately wanted.

It's pretty painful. Would you be wrong to flip the script?

But you could never turn your back on your sister; she was family.

And you shouldn't hate her just because she succeeded.

So you swallowed your hatred, approached her, and offered your blessings as she accepted them with a grating, cunning smile.

But none of the kind blessings that came out of your mouth held any truth, and somehow you could tell she knows.

So would it be wrong of you to…

"Satoru... what are you saying?" I managed, my voice barely above a whisper.

The words sent a jolt through me. "I want this… and you. Having you by my side is all I want."

He closed the distance between us, his presence overwhelming. Up close, I could make out every striking detail of his face - those high cheekbones, the strong jawline, full lips quirked in a knowing frown.

"I- I don't understand–"

"You know exactly what I'm getting at," he murmured, sending shivers down my spine. "I'm tired of settling just so the next person has their happy ending. Shouldn't you be too?"

I felt my face flush hot. Had I really been that obvious?

Of course, I was tired, but I didn't want to ruin my sister's, no, my family's life.

Then again, you thought about it. What had your family ever done for you? What else had your family given to your sister when it should've been yours?

Part of me screamed that this was an unforgivable act against my sister, my flesh and blood. 

But the other part didn't care, consumed by the burning need to have Gojo for myself, to take away the one thing you knew would devastate her.

But doesn’t that make you just her…just like them?

Ceasing the anger, “We can't," I said, trying to reject him, but yet, as much as I knew this was wrong, I couldn't help it. Just being near him set my nerves on fire.

Gojo's thumb stroked along my jawline as he held my gaze. "Maybe once upon a time, those rules mattered," he murmured. "But look at us now– we can choose. I'll force them if I have to."

His eyes shone with a seriousness I had never seen directed my way before. Gojo was always so carefree, so unshakable. But now–, you just didn't know.

"Don't overthink this," he urged softly. "Not when I've waited so long just to get you alone like this."

One of Gojo's hands came up to cup my cheek, calloused thumb brushing over my skin reverently. "Tell me you don't feel the same way," he said, voice almost a whisper. "Tell me, and I'll walk away. You have my word."

I searched his face and found only affection and patience there. He would respect my answer, whatever it was.

And at that moment, I couldn't bring myself to care about the consequences. His embrace was all I craved, moral objections be damned.

Slowly, I shook my head. "I can't lie to you, Satoru. Not about this..." I licked my suddenly dry lips. "I feel the same way."

A look of profound relief and joy washed over Gojo's features. He stroked my cheekbone with such gentle reverence.

Then, ever so slowly, he closed the small distance between us and brushed his lips across mine in a feather-soft kiss. An electrifying jolt went through me at the tender contact.

When he pulled back, I could see the depth of emotion shining in his eyes, everything he felt was laid bare. At that moment, I knew I was forever lost to this man.

Let them condemn me.

"No more hesitations and no turning back. You're mine now," he whispered, his breath hot against my skin. 

"I wouldn't have it any other way." With trembling hands, I pulled him closer, savoring his warmth, his scent, his very being. 

Tonight, we would be each other's ruin, and I couldn't wait to fall.

[ultratradmalewife]

I fear I may have spoken too soon. I made a post thinking there would be a turn around in the attitude certain Buddie shippers have towards anyone who doesn’t validate their ship, but I just don’t think they quite understand what they’re doing. Some of them are downplaying their homophobia to only the cutting Lou out of the stills, but when I make claims about that it’s something serious, and not really about some stills. How they handle situations like this will and is affecting real life queer people who aren’t secure in their sexuality.

I’ve seen damaging words tossed around about not just a character but a real man, calling him predatory. I’ve seen real fans slinging the word fetish to other queer fans. These fans have almost always done nothing wrong, most of it only comes from one side (I would know I’m chronically online). And we have major accounts like that deranged Samantha girl (who only recently started celebrating Bucks bisexual journey, wonder why) on Twitter amplifying one single shipper who had a really bad take, and these fans know what they’re doing because they use that one take as a weapon to talk about a fictional relationship, a relationship that is currently in the spotlight with general audiences, and all that audience is seeing is that one rotten apple, that one rotten take, and they’ll form an opinion on not just the ship (I don’t care about the ship), but the community itself. That’s where the homophobia comes in.

Do you really think some still is what would cause us to finally be vocal about how our community is being dragged by these fans who can’t think beyond their ship??? We’re being tagged by these accusations and malice, and you expect us to be quiet about it? I defended my trans sisters all last year on Twitter because transphobes made the same accusations, and none once did I think I would have to see this repeated when entering the fandom.

If anyone is actually here for the right reasons I urge you please shut these people up. It’s getting more personal and more nasty now. Ryan’s racist past is re-emerging because Buddie fans are so hell bent on always calling a fictional man (Tommy) racist whenever they can. It’s not my place to forgive Ryan, but none of this would’ve happened if you gave a new character the same decency you gave an actor. Obviously the real human should always come first, but when it comes to race this is a situation that is too real. It wouldn’t surprise me if there’s Buddie shippers actively trying to find something of Lou’s past to smear him, and if they do that’s on him, but this back and forth will only grow more intense by the minute to the point this show will become unenjoyable to everyone. The show brought us together for a reason and I will like to keep it that way, and I urge those bloodthirsty shippers to find that reason again.

(And Buddies what is it with you calling anyone who doesn’t like your ship racist? I’m a Mexican who doesn’t like Buddie because of the stereotype of a catholic gay. Does that make me racist?)

[17-noodlebird]

So I keep hearing buzz about the Jax hate going on on the internet that Gooseworx (the creator of The Amazing Digital Circus) and Michael Kovach (the VA for Jax himself) called us out on, with the former saying that only the strongest Jax fans will survive the show.

WELL WHAT ABOUT CAINE!?

None of the theory farmers seem to give a single damn about my fav teef boi, despite there being other avid Caine defenders like myself out there trying (and ultimately failing) to reason with the Caine haters. Even Alex Rochon (Caine's VA) had to give his two cents on Twitter/X to try to quell the increasing hate on Caine. Some of the more outspoken Caine haters are even going out of their way to straight up bully him in the comments section of a fan animation of TADC on YouTube. Where did we go wrong, you guys!!??

You wouldn't cyberbully a real life person, so why is everyone cyberbullying a fictional character over an honest mistake that he was never even informed of due to a lack of communication!?

And an unpopular opinion of mine: I wasn't upset at all about Gummigoo's demise like the others were. In fact, I didn't even get attached to him in that episode. I just thought he was a neat character; nothing more, nothing less.

I'm not mad. Just disappointed. Extremely disappointed. I genuinely expected better from you guys. I really did.

So if Gooseworx says that only the strongest Jax fans will survive the show, then I would like to proudly declare that only the strongest Caine fans will survive the show.

Please don't harass any Caine ask blogs on Tumblr about Gummigoo's death/disappearance. I think it's safe to say he's more than already aware of what he's done, and you do NOT need to rub it in.

You know it doesn't take much to let me down on the Internet, but holy shit, have we been reaching new lows lately. And this was all because I commented on a freaking fan animation of TADC on YouTube.

[bluepixiedream]

Okay okay I’m currently writing ‘Good Dogs Only’ chapter 2 BUT I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA I CANT HOLD BACK. I NEED TO VENT IT OUT.

IM VERY EXCITED

OKAY HERE WE GO

Cw: violence, language, blood, cursing, and kidnapping. Kind of a dark fic? Viewer discretion is advised.

Picture it:

Cute, pretty innocent reader who works hard at their job, enjoys their nice home that’s located outside of town, your flower and small vegetable garden that you spend hours on to make it more lively, all sorts of books on your living room shelf (quite obviously doesn’t get many visitors due to the adult nature of some of these books) and occasionally binges Doctor Who. Normal. Peaceful. Nothing out of the ordinary.

After work one day, you head to a small market for some dinner supplies which includes a pot roast, a meat cleaver and a bottle of rum. Unbeknownst to you, a stranger hides in the backseat of the car while you’re inside and you are none the wiser. Throwing the items in the passenger seat, you head on home. Music blaring. A lit joint between your lips and the wind in your air. Friday night and you have a hot date with a few toys and a new book that should have arrived this afternoon. Everything was perfect.

A light pops up on the dash and anxiety slams into you like you can’t imagine. What was wrong now? Could you make it home? How much would this cost? Before, you weren’t high enough and now you were too high. You wanted to curse yourself.

Pulling over as quickly as you could, you decide after a minute to check all the doors and make sure everything was okay. Before you could take off your seat belt, a plastic bag is placed over your head and tightened.

Panic and adrenaline floods you as you struggle to breath. Your hands, that immediately went to your neck to relieve the pressure, release and attempt the poke a hole through the thick, unforgiving plastic. You think that this is it. This is how you die. Pathetic and alone. Murdered of all things.

But thankfully you tear through and air hits your screaming lungs. Without thinking, you wrap a hand around your brand new meat cleaver and begin swinging behind you. Somehow managing to get out of your seatbelt, you continue your brutal assault until you're sure you killed your attacker, or at least, knock them out.

You're breathing hard. Everything is covered in the attackers sticky, cooling blood. You can’t even cry. Completely shocked at what has transpired these last few minutes.

Not knowing what to do, you start driving home again. Music off. Windows up. Fear stinking up the air. The drive home had never been longer, nor quieter.

Pulling to your house, you open the garage door and drive in, refusing to get out until the door shuts completely. You hear the man, their attacker, groan in pain and you kick it in high gear. Grabbing a dinning room chair and some rope you had hoped to use for private time, you use what strength you have to pull him in the chair and tie him like you’ve read over and over again in your BDSM books. You tightened the ropes as much as possible before stopping. The man is trying to wake, but can’t. Blood is drying against his head and bruises are blooming across what you can see.

Leaving your car door open, you grab your groceries and, in a complete and utter daze, turn off the light and head inside.

Once inside, you wash your hands before starting dinner. Halfway through with zero thoughts in your head, the attacker is awake and screaming at you to let him go. That he will kill you. You will suffer greatly for what you’ve done. You don’t do anything until dinner is put in the crockpot and you take a quick shower to get rid of the rest of the blood.

What to do, you think. Do you call the police? Wouldn’t they wonder why you didn’t call immediately? Why take him back to your place? Is that weed they smell in the car?

Would they release the attacker? Would the attacker come back for you to finish the job?

You can’t think. You can’t deal with this. What should you do? No family to turn to. You can’t get their coworkers involved, that’s just wrong. You have nobody.

You remember a bar near the other side of town, near an empty field. It’s normally filled with military people, bikers and gangsters. A “neutral place” so to speak. Nobody fucks with each other and they got booze, music and sometimes ladies who paraded themselves. It was a haven for them.

And a perfect spot for you to go and find a person to help you…deal with this situation.

Changing clothes and almost feeling a bit better, other than the man screaming if you listened hard enough, you decide it’s time. You stop at the garage and realize you can’t take your car, wait for a cab to pick you up a block away. Before you leave, you tell your attacker that you are getting help.

You don’t clarify what help you're getting, or for who. For the attacker, or for the attackee.

The cab drops you off a few blocks away from the bar and happily accepts the cash you hand them. It’s getting dark, the lights from the bar illuminates way and the big man who is watching people come and go waves you in. He thinks it’s definitely not the your scene, but who is he to say otherwise?

People fill the bar. Some are playing poker. Others are sitting at the bar and others are in booths having secretive discussions. You can’t help but feel eyes on you, clocking you, a shark drawn to blood. You try to not look around too much before going up the bar and ordering two shots of vodka to calm your nerves. As soon as they arrive, they’re both immediately knocked back, side by side. You order two more and start to feel comfortable enough to look around.

A few men in leather jackets playing pool glance at you but they go back to playing. A few people covered in tattoos and dark clothes stay to themselves in a booth closest to the door and the other booth holds four men who were obviously military. One man had mutton chops and a beanie. Another was beautiful with dark skin, full lips and a baseball cap. The third had a Mohawk and a lazy smile to whatever mutton chops had said. The last, and the one you figured out was staring a hole into you, was a complete enigma. Built like a tank and scarier than the boogie man, a black mask covered his whole face as a sewed on skull mask covered the top part of his face. His eyes were dark, and latched on to yours immediately.

Hands sweaty and nerves shot, you throw back the two shots once more before gathering the courage to walk up to the big man in a skull mask.

Apart of you rips you to shreds. How stupid you were. You already had one psychotic maniac in your garage and here you are, walking up to another one, possibly.

Nobody at the table was ready for you to walk up, as suddenly the atmosphere changed as all four eyes locked on the new arrival.

The 141 was use to people staring at them, whispering about them, wanting them. It was completely different when someone actually walked up to them. And especially being as…innocent as you were. A cute flower shirt stating “Carrot On My Wayward Son” with blue jeans and sandals didn’t exactly scream “intimidating!”. You had everyone’s attention.

But especially Ghost. Who clocked you as soon as you stepped in and didn’t stop as you drank and took inventory of the crowd.

It was exhilarating.

“Can I get you a drink?” Was the first thing you said and it was directed at Ghost. If you could scream at yourself, you would. No introductions, no “sorry for interrupting” or “I hope you guys are having a good night”. Immediately going for “do you want a drink and take me home?”. This wasn’t you.

Neither was almost beating a man to death, so you were finding out new things about you all the time.

You didn’t pay attention to the rest of the guys, who looked wildly at each other. This was NOT what they had expected but they stayed silent. Many people didn’t approach Ghost but here you were.

He stayed silent as well, taking note of your facial expression and watching as it fell. Taking his silence for rejection. Before you could apologize and turn around, his voice came out from the mask and if you survived this whole ordeal, you would beg him to read a manual so you could masturbate to it later.

“Bourbon. Kentucky.”

A smile laced your lips as you nodded and turned around to order it for him. He decided rather quickly that he liked your smile and wanted to see it more. Ignoring the rest of his team, he got up and silently followed you up the bar. You snagged a place by the wall and waited as the bartender completed your request.

You couldn’t ignore the behemoth of a man standing next to you and you couldn’t stop your face from warming up as you realized how close you two were standing.

“Not y’r usual scene, luv?” His voice vibrated through you. Addicting. You chuckled looking up at him.

“That obvious?”

“Dead give away.” His gloved lightly touched your shirt, but you could swear he just set it on fire. You couldn’t help but also blush at how ridiculous you must look. You laughed at yourself.

“I guess I didn’t see what I put on before getting here.” You tried explaining lamely, suddenly thankful the bartender chose to drop off his drink.

“Put it on my tab. ‘ers too.” The way he said it made your argument die on your tongue. Of course you could pay for it, but how could you say no?

You could see him pull his mask up and you found the bar to be interesting, desperate to give him privacy.

He would be lying if he said that didn’t make his cock hard. Look at you. Being so obedient and so polite. Fuck, it was gonna kill him. After his mask was back on, you turned back to him, losing yourself in his dark eyes.

“Thank you.” In your head, it was confident and stern but in reality, it barely came out a whisper.

“Wha’ do ya need, luv?” Getting straight to the point, and it brought you back to why exactly you were here in the first place.

You weren’t here to flirt with guys in skull masks. You were here because you were in trouble and you needed help. You couldn’t help the broken inhale or the way you chest shuddered. Ghost clocked all of it. Suddenly, his dark thoughts became even darker.

Something was wrong with his little luv and he wanted to fix it. No, he needed to fix it.

“I’m…kind of in a bind. And I don’t know what to do.” He hummed at that. He glanced back to his table before meeting your eyes.

“Your place or mine?”

~

You explained you didn’t drive here and asked if you should get a cab. He declined, stating he’ll take you both. Giving him directions to your place, you couldn’t help but be surprised at his vehicle of choice: a black Harley. You should have guessed but it still made you stutter. He looked over at you with your wide eyes and eyebrows near your hair line and laughed. Deep and velvety and it grew a flower inside of your chest that you couldn’t explain away.

“Scared, luv?” Ghost chuckled, fixing to put his helmet over your head. “Hang on tight.” Watching him mount his bike should be considered illegal, and you couldn’t help the clench of your thighs as you took in this specimen.

It had been way too long.

He turned on his bike as you got behind him and hanging on to him tightly, he began the ride back to your house. Your prison. You soaked in his warmth and the way his muscles contracted against your chest. He was all muscle and it had been too long since you felt muscle. You wished the drive was longer, so you could pretend that maybe you actually went to the bar looking for fun, and you really did pick up a guy and now you were headed back to your place to see how far you would go. You could actually be normal.

But all dreams end and yours ended rather quickly as he pulled up to your driveway. You waited for him to kill the bike and tell you it’s okay to let go. He does after a moment. He didn’t want you to know how good it felt having you wrapped around him. Like you belonged there. Like you belonged with him.

Tearing the helmet off and shaking your head, you hand it back with a small ‘thanks’. You both stared at each other before his eyes left yours to look over at place. Jogging your place to memory. Now he knew your address, and if you thought he wasn’t coming back, well, you would be sorely mistaken.

“Cute place.” His voice melted you and you couldn’t help but give him genuine smile. You did appreciate his comment, you had worked hard on your yard and house. This was yours. You wanted to make it perfect.

You begin walking to your front door as your heart went into overdrive. You feel like you should turn him away. You should get a rain check. You wanted this guy to come back, not help you with this. You didn’t want to scare him away. Before you knew it, both of you stood in the front door as you dug in your pocket for your house key. Finding it quicker than later, your hands shook as you unlocked the door. Before you could do the logical thing and stop him from coming inside and discovering one of your deepest and darkest secrets, you swing the door open and step inside.

It was quiet, thankfully, as you allowed this hunk of man to walk in after you and close your door.

Ghost didn’t know what to expect. You still haven’t told him what issue you were having and his mind was going wild. Was it a boyfriend issue? Landlord being a prick? Stalker who couldn’t get the message?

Looking over your house, he thought it was too fucking cute. Maybe you had a rat issue and didn’t have a man to help you out. Of course, Ghost would help you out. And you two would be discussing payment later after it was done.

He took in your soft yellow lights filling the room. An older episode of ‘Doctor Who’ playing silently as his eyes took in your posters that covered your walls. Some of them were older movies. A few he recognized, like ‘The Thing’ by John Carpenter and ‘Legally Blonde’ with Elle Woods. He had Johnny to thank for having control over the TV one night in the barracks and he didn’t want to admit that it caught his attention more than not.

Your bookshelf caught his eye next as he took in your collection. A few were a book series that he didn’t know but they looked fantasy in nature, and others were one offs and some horror books scattered around but one that caught his eye and made him turn back to you was: ‘How to tie up your partner properly and 99 other things BDSM related.”

He couldn’t help the smile, even if you couldn’t see it.

“In a bin’, yeah?” Your cheeks violently heated up as you realized he clocked your books and saw one that must have peaked your interest. You crossed your arms and laughed, heading now towards the kitchen to stir the crockpot, to keep yourself busy.

“Sorry about those. I don’t really get much company. They’re just for looks. Like gag gifts.” You tried to explain. Ghost followed you and took in a big whiff of what was one of the best things he's ever smelled before.

Look at you in your perfect little home, not scared to go to a bar filled with bad men, approaching him like it wasn’t a death sentence and respecting his privacy while he drank. And fuck. The food smelled delicious. You were perfect. Absolutely perfect.

“‘t’s okay, luv. You give me whatever’s cookin and I’ll get you in and out of any bin’ you want.” You thought he was still lightly making fun of you. You couldn’t be further from the truth. You smiled, but it didn’t reach your eyes. Your heart was thumping thinking that the garage was too quiet. Was the man sleeping or did he escape? Was he waiting for you to check on him before attacking you again? Would this new man actually help?

Did you make the worst mistake of your life?

Deciding no time like the present, you needed advice and sooner the better, you stood by the door, less than a foot away from Mr. Tall, Dark and Sexy and took a deep breath in.

“I was hoping you could help me with this. Help me…navigate. I don’t know how to explain it, so I wanted to show you first and then tell you, if that’s alright?” Your voice started off strong but got quieter as time went on. Ghost suddenly became rigid and aware of his surroundings. He couldn’t think of what could possibly be behind that door that you so desperately didn’t want to show him, but had to. You needed help. And you found him.

It didn’t matter what was behind that door. Of course he would help you, sweet thing. And then he would eat dinner with you, then fuck your brains out and while you were sleeping, install some security cameras before asking you out on a proper date.

You had interested the beast when you walked in bar, and his interest has only been growing since.

“Go ahead luv, I got you. I’m ‘ere.” His voice shouldn’t have calmed you as much as it did, but you couldn’t stop the wave crashing over you. You trusted him and that was terrifying.

Unlocking the door, you swung it open.

The smell was the first thing to hit him.

Dried blood and sour piss wafting in and leaking into your home. The darkness was consuming and you couldn’t see a inch in front of you until you flicked on the light and your horror scene could be fully realized by the man in the skull mask.

Other than the small green car that had its back door opened with dried blood covering the seat, a small freezer near the back exit and a shelf full of canned goods, there was a bloody man, tied up with his head off to one side, either dead or passed out.

“I know what it looks like but-“

“Little dove, this is exactly what you think it looks like.” You expected him to sound horrified, or at least disgusted. Not…amused. It startled you but you kept your cool. Maybe this was his initial reaction. He certainly wasn’t expecting this, you assume.

You head to the freezer to grab a bottle of alcohol. Rum. Ghost closes the door with you three in the garage and walks to the tied up man. He takes note of his stained and soiled clothes, multi-day stubble and greasy hair. Ghosts gloves hand reaches out and grips the man by the hair, waking him up and forcing him to look at Ghost with a dazed look before all sleep vanished and what was left was pure rage. Ghost held out his other hand for the bottle, which you did as you were told. He quickly made do with the cap before pushing the man’s head back and pouring some in his mouth.

“How d’ you end up here? Honestly.” His voice dropped lower than you had heard it before. It was terrifying and made you realize how nice he had sounded before. How much you enjoyed that.

The man tried to turn towards you but Ghosts hand wrapped tighter around his hair, refusing to let him move an inch. “Not at her. Me.” He commanded and you realized quickly that this man wasn’t just a soldier but a leader. A commander in his own right. It was terrifying and yet, strangely, horribly turned you on.

It had been way too long, you completely decided.

He had gave you back the bottle which you took gently before standing away from the two, trying to stay out of the attackers eye sight, trying to listen to the man who was clearly in charge now. The attacker sneered, his lips curled back as he gauges the guy that held him.

“This stupid fucking bitch-” before you could put together what happened, the attackers head snapped back and he yowled in pain. Fresh blood spurting out from his nose as now he laid crooked and absolutely broken. Ghost didn’t give him a second before yanking him back to him, anger now littering his voice.

“Wanna try tha’ again without insulting my little dove?” You couldn’t stop the warmth from flooding you. When was the last time someone spoke about you like that? Protected your character like it was your job?

You were definitely going to call him after this, you thought happily to yourself in this middle of the chaos.

“Oh fuck you man. Your girl is a fucking cunt-”

Another hit and after that Ghost began walking away, beckoning you with his fingers, which you obeyed without a care in the world. The man was left to himself screaming and when the door closed on him, his screams were greatly reduced but still there if you listened. And you did. You stayed quiet, gauging what the newcomer thought. Ghost stayed silent, and inched his hand to the bottle that you held which you gave him graciously. He pulled his mask up to drink and you looked away again, but you could hear it pour down his throat and it settled something warm in you. Once he was done, he pulled his mask back down and gave you the bottle and you followed lead. The rum eased some of your anxiety, letting you feel warm as you pulled off your shoes and sat on your couch, waiting for him to join.

Ghost grabbed a chair before dragging it and sitting it directly in front of you, invading your space. You wouldn’t complain. Maybe he wasn’t close enough…

“So, luv. I was expecting some boyfriend issue. Maybe dirty landlord, or a fuckin’ rat. But kidnapping and torture? Well. If you didn’t have my interest before, you definitely got it now.” His accent was deeper and darker but you couldn’t say if he was angry or not. Your eyes dropped from his in shame and landed on his chest before his fingers lightly gripped your chin to lift them back to his. You gulped before you nodded. Fear soaked you through and through. You needed to tell him your story. You needed him to understand.

“Well, I was driving home from after work…”

[echowithpain]

Alright, it's been a bit since 911 has a done an episode following one storyline (with a few flashbacks) and holy shit they deliver every time.

The first 10/10 episode of the season!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

Seeing Bobby's backstory with how he grew up/what his family was like... I... genuinely have no words.

I do, however, have words about the main story with Bobby trying to talk to Amir.

One of those words being "incredible". I was so invested in the absolute cinema that, you guys saw, I was barely commenting I was so engrossed. Just taking it all in.

(Again, fuck the promo for making it seem like Amir was gonna go psycho crazy on Bobby with repressed anger. I know the promos are made to get you excited about the next episode, but they could've just had Amir's speech at the AA meeting and Bobby going out to the desert and asking about Amir. But whatever, I'm not on the promo team)

One thing I can point out that I absolutely loved was when Amir told Bobby the reason he spoke up was because he was sizing him up, trying to see how someone who was responsible for so much loss and pain was able to carry on. "Pretty damn easy it seems." Bobby says "that's not actually true" but as Amir goes on about how Bobby was talking about how blessed he's been and how he doesn't want Bobby's apologies or any of his ways to make amends, Bobby doesn't jump in at any time and try to correct him about his own struggles.

He doesn't bring up how he lost his family, how he went even deeper into alcoholism, or how he had a book where he would write down the names of 148 people he saved as a way to make up for the 148 ones who died because of the fire he caused, and that once the book was filled he was gonna kill himself.

People are allowed to be angry. If you screwed up something in someone's life, intentionally or not, and they are angry at you for that, trying to put your perspective in how things went or trying to tell them how you've changed as a person since then is a fucking terrible thing to do because then you'd be invalidating their feelings and making it about you.

None of that.

He let Amir speak his mind and tell him his pain, even if he didn't know the whole story. If Bobby tried to correct him or interject about the fact that he actually suffered greatly, it would've felt like he was trying to make what Amir was saying seem almost irrelevant because "you're wrong, I was hurt by my actions too and I'm still trying to get over it just like you".

There are some people in this world who will never forgive you for some of the things you've done, whether it's genuine wrongdoings or petty bullshit. If you try to insert yourself into their life, just to bring up how wrong they are about you because you've changed/they don't have the full story or how they're being childish and need to just forgive you already, you're being an asshole.

Even when Bobby and Amir are in the hospital after everything's said and done and Bobby talks to him one more time, Amir even says "Please tell me you're not gonna keep coming back here until I forgive you because that's not-" before he gets cut off by Bobby saying he doesn't expect his forgiveness. Thank fuck.

Bobby just lets him know that he's heard him and he acknowledges the pain he's caused him. And while he does bring up he didn't just walk away from the fire, instead of taking that time to express his own loss and pain, Bobby just tells him that he's carried it with him every day and night since and that he knows there's nothing he can do to erase all the pain he's caused to Amir and the other families. He even proves that he's carried it with him by giving Amir his wife's info, including which number she was on the list of people who died in the fire. He doesn't make it about him, he keeps focus on the feelings of Amir and the others he's hurt, and I'm so thankful for that. Amir may never want to see Bobby again after this, and that's okay!

That is one thing I've gotten sick of seeing in cartoons/movies/tv shows/etc. The whole forcing forgiveness trope thing is so overdone and unnecessary. The amount of times I've seen people or characters doing the most horrendous stuff only to be forgiven by the people they've hurt because of "forgive and forget" and "letting go of the anger in their hearts so they can move on" is absolute bullshit. Or someone would've done something in their past and as a different person in the present, they go out of their way to track down the people they've hurt and won't leave them alone until they can see just how much they've changed as a person and eventually decide to forgive them.

Fuck off.

I was a bit worried at the beginning that that's where 911 was taking the story, but they didn't and I'm so fucking glad. They had their talk and while he didn't have to say anything, Amir tells Bobby that he became a nurse so he can do for others what he couldn't do the night of the fire and that's saving his wife. That's the last thing we hear from him. He could later tell Bobby he never wants to see him again, to get out of his life, or even to go fuck himself. We don't get full confirmation if he actually forgives him or not after their second talk, and you know what? I didn't mind that one bit.

If you've wronged someone and try to make amends for what you've done, no matter how big or small, but they never want to see you again, leave them be. If you've wronged someone and try to make amends, but they don't want to listen to you and instead decide to spend their life constantly reminding you of what you did and harassing you about it to make you feel bad, block them on social media and get a restraining order.

It's that simple.

(btw if we go into the next episode and Bobby is constantly checking up on Amir but Amir didn't forgive him or it turns out Amir is the one who set the grill(?) on fire outside of Bobby and Athena's place as a way to "get back at him" then I'm disregarding everything I'm saying about this episode and the score will plummet from a 10/10 to a 2/10. 911 I've got my eye on you.)

[flowergirlzz]

Hello I'm here with an idea. I frequently have panic attacks and thought. What if you make a Simon or Roach x anxiety or panic attack reader fluff comfort.

you slam the door shut behind you the second you step into the warm house, a heavy exhale leaving your mouth as a reminder that you can relax now, you're home.

a stressful week had triggered your recurring anxiety. something you had never really been able to completely get rid off. it crept up when you least expected it with thoughts that seemed to be nearly impossible to ignore, almost mimicking cells in the way it appeared so natural that the thoughts automatically duplicated and spread all over, tricking both your brain and your body into thinking that something is wrong. the underlying feeling of nervousness, fear and a bunch of "what ifs" taking over your mind and pushing every rational thought aside.

you had managed to ignore the anxiety that had piled on and on throughout the week, telling yourself that you had no other choice but to suck it up and live with it even though there was nothing you wanted to do more than to lay down in bed and sleep for a month or two, solely to get a break from the negative thoughts, racing heart and clenching jaw.

the anxiety rarely stopped all by itself and instead built up and became more prominent, harder to contain. especially when you suppressed it instead of giving it an outlet, which you had not done in a while is what you recall as you kick your shoes off and head into the kitchen to grab a glass of water to hopefully calm yourself down a bit.

your heart only increases and your breath starts hitching as you stand in the too quiet kitchen, alone. all alone. which is the last thing you need right now, and you know it. so you do the only thing you can think of and pull your phone out of your pocket with now trembling hands. dialing. ringing. not even two seconds go by before he picks up.

"hey love I was jus-"

"can you come over?" you interrupt simon before he gets to finish his sentence. your eyes now filling with tears that threaten to spill.

simon immediately hears the panic in your voice, knows you too well to be able to miss it.

"what's wrong? did something happen?" his own voice switching from relaxed to serious and concerned.

"I can't calm myself down" you continue in between quick small breaths, going from 0 to 100 real quick.

"I'll be there in 5, stay on the phone with me"

-

when simon enters the house exactly five minutes later he immediately scans anything and everything his sight reaches, his instincts kicking in, before making his way to your bedroom with definite steps.

upon slowly opening the door to your bedroom he finds you lying curled up in a ball on the bed, back facing him and sobs escaping your mouth. there were few things in life that simon hated more than seeing you upset and if he could he would take all the pain you had ever felt away from you. in a heartbeat.

you feel the bed dip with his heavy weight as he scoots his way over to embrace your distressed form in his arms.

"I've got you love, it'll be alright" he whispers into your hair with closed eyes almost as if it hurt him seeing you hurt. his arms only bringing you closer to him like a silent promise of "you're not alone", "I'm here". you could feel simons steady breathing going up and down his chest on your back and his hands gently caressing your skin. his calm demeanor a big contrast to your own anguished one.

"I'm sorry" you manage to get out between sobs, guilt making its way to your already packed mind. an old habit of yours that you knew was unnecessary. you weren't bothering simon. in fact he wanted nothing but to help you and you knew this, had been through this with him many times before. you had learned to accept his help, to let him in instead of shutting him out, to talk about what you were feeling or going through.

"none of that" simon responds, his voice still just a whisper.

"try matching my breathing"

and you do. although not being able to completely relax or let go of the thoughts spiraling in your mind, you try matching your breathing to his, focusing on the way he holds you in his warm embrace, making you feel safer than you did anywhere else in this world, knowing that they would always do so. keep you safe

"that's it love" simon says when he feels your breath start to calm down and your sobs turn into quiet crying.

maybe you would want to talk about what you were feeling.

maybe you would just want to fall asleep in simons comforting presence.

whatever it was and however long it took to get there, he would still be there holding you, whispering reassuring words into your ear and making you feel seen, heard.

"I'm here"

[vilevenom]

hurt comfort for fem branch please 😭

I hc her as autistic so maybe male poppy reassuring her

Ik u don't really care ABT the genders, but I'm heavy projecting on branch cause I kin him and I am DYING today

Thank you SO SO SO much for writing it if you decide to

HELLO ANON!

I am SO sorry that you sent this ask around a week ago and I'm only able to give you something now. I also hope I'm not posting this too late for you 😕 (This is the first night on my vacation I've managed to dig my laptop out) I wrote this pretty quick, and I didn't give it a good read over to properly edit it, but I hope you like it, and that you're doing okay ❤️❤️❤️ P.S-I'm not well verse in regards to austism, so I'm not super comfy writing it. I used my own experiences with overstimulation and sensory overload to write this

It had been…a day. An overwhelming, awful day. And it wasn't even close to being over yet.

Branch had woken up feeling like today wasn't necessarily going to be a bad day, but she knew it wasn't necessarily going to be a good day, either. Of course, that had been before she'd even gotten out of bed. Once she'd pushed herself up and threw her legs over the side, she'd near instantly knew the day was going to be a struggle. The floor was too cold under her feet, none of her clothes felt like they fit on her body quite right, every light was either too bright or too dark, and none of the food in her bunker was appetizing.

Things only got worse when Poppy showed up to drag her out for the morning music routine. She'd gone, of course. She couldn't let Poppy down. However, stepping outside had proven to be the worst decision she'd made yet. The sun was far too bright, and everyone in the village was so loud. And there were just so many trolls participating in the music number, it made her feel like she was in a teeny, tiny room, instead of out doors.

Thankfully, once the song was done and over with, she managed to sneak away quickly to catch her breath and recenter herself somewhat, before Poppy found her once again. She was invited to breakfast with the Snack Pack, which she felt obligated to accept, despite her negligible appetite. She thought, perhaps, she could get away with picking at a muffin while sitting next to Poppy so the King of Pop could direct and hold conversation without needing much, if any, input from her. Unfortunately, that was not to be the case, as Poppy kept prompting Branch to speak. It was exhausting.

Finally, once breakfast was over Branch thought she was at last free and clear. She bid farewell to the snack pack and tried to sneak away, but Poppy wasn't having any of it. He appeared in front of Branch just as she thought she had made it to safety.

"CUPCAKES! Poppy," Branch wheezed, patting at her chest as her heart felt like it was trying to escape her chest. To say that the surprise had also caused her irritation and irritability to spike was also an understatement. She scowled without thought at the pink troll, a low growl escaping her. "What is it?!"

Poppy looked distraught at Branch's anger, shrinking in on himself a little. "Sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I just wanted to know if you wanted to come with me while I go take care of some errands around the village before lunch with Nova Swift to talk about an upcoming fashion show."|

Branch immediately deflated at Poppy's apology, though she still felt like she might explode if prodded just the wrong way. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap," she sighed, rubbing at her forehead, "You know I would normally love to join you around town, but today I just-" She groaned and waved her hands through the air. "I don't know how to describe it. Today everything just feels like too much. I don't think I can handle any more…anyone."

Poppy blinked, obviously a bit surprised by Branch's response. Which was to be expected, really. What troll didn't like to socialize and make plans for big events? Branch knew, even after all the work she'd put in to being a better troll, she was still very much an odd one out.

"Oh," Poppy hummed, rubbing his hands together for a moment, before giving a little nod. "Okay."

It was Branch's turn to blink in surprise, not having expected Poppy to take her at face value so easily or quickly. "Wait…really? You're okay if I skip out on today?"

Poppy's face melted into a warm smile, offering a quick nod. "Of course, Branch. You've been doing so much around the village lately, you deserve a day to relax."

"Oh, thank you," Branch felt her shoulders slump as her chin fell to her chest. She heard Poppy chuckle and only jumped slightly when she felt his hand land on her shoulder.

"Of course! You know I just want you to be comfortable and happy."

"Thanks, Poppy," Branch hummed, offering Poppy a strained smile.

"Any time. Now, let's get you back to the bunker," Poppy said as he moved behind Branch to gently take her by the shoulders and direct her towards her bunker.

Everything seemed like it was going relatively well after that, and Branch shuffled towards her bunker with Poppy following shortly behind. That was, of course, until a random troll suddenly jumped from the bushes in front of them screaming about an impromptu dance party. Branch bristled as Poppy froze behind her and music erupted from every direction, while trolls hurried into the area to start dancing and singing along to the music.

Branch felt like her head was going to explode, quickly lifting her hands to her ears to try and block out some of the sound. She squeezed her eyes shut, a quiet whimper leaving her even as he breathing began to quicken, along with her heart beat. The world felt like it was closing in around her as she curled in on herself, crouching down and just barely resisting the urge to wrap herself protectively in her hair.

It took a solid minute for Branch to register hands on her shoulders again, let alone the fact that someone was even talking to her. She blinked a few times, feeling like she was clearing her vision of static until she could see Poppy crouched in front of her.

"Poppy?"

"There you are! C'mon, Branch. I'm going to get you out of here," Poppy said over the din of the other trolls in the area partying.

Branch simply nodded, watching in mild confusion as Poppy turned and gestured towards his back. "Up you get, come on," Poppy urged, finally making Branch realize that the King was offering her a piggy back ride. Sluggishly she moved, struggling to get her limbs to cooperate.

Once Branch was settled over Poppy's back with her face buried in bright pink hair, the King began to move quickly through the crowd, easily and effectively dodging around anyone that tried to get him to dance. Somehow, he managed to get away from the spontaneous party and got Branch back to the bunker. He didn't let her down, however, until the two were down the elevator and in Branch's living room. Carefully, he deposited her on her couch, quickly whisking away to fetch a glass of water, pressing it into her slightly shaky hands when he returned to her.

"You okay?"

Branch shook her head, feeling like her voice was stuck in her throat, unable to verbally respond.

"Okay. What would you like to help make you feel better?"

A quiet whine escaped Branch, her shoulders shifting up to her ears, eyes downcast, wishing she could force her voice to work, but nothing was forthcoming. She would love nothing more than to respond to Poppy, who was being so kind and caring, only to receive silence back.

After a beat Poppy snapped his fingers, causing Branch to jump and stare at him with wide eyes. "Oops," he laughed awkwardly, "Sorry. But, uh, how about we stick to yes or no questions? That way you can just nod or shake your head?"

Branch perked up and gave a little nod, a wobbly little smile making its way onto her face.

"Okay, perfect! Would you like a blanket?"

Branch thought for a moment, before giving a short nod. Poppy grinned and was off like a shot, returning not a minute later to carefully drape a thick, cozy blanket around Branch's shoulders. It took her a moment to recognize it was one of her favorites to snuggle up with. Poppy must have noticed one of the times he was over to hang out.

"All right! Now, you've got water already. And it's nice and quiet down here. Would you like company? And by company, I do just mean me," Poppy said with a little grin. Branch let out a near silent laugh, before nodding slightly, thought she frowned after a beat, opening her mouth, only to snap it shut again a moment later with a little look of concern on her face.

Poppy frowned, only to chuckled and move to sit next to Branch on the couch. "Oh, don't worry about the village. I'm sure they'll be fine without me."

Branch let out a breath, humming quietly with a nod, forever grateful that somehow Poppy could read her like an open book. She took a few tentative sips of her water before setting the glass aside, then turned a mild look of trepidation towards Poppy. It lasted for only a moment before she let out a huff of breath, a mild scowl of determination settling itself on her face. Poppy offered a lopsided, confused smile as Branch shifted around on the couch, tossing half of the blanket over Poppy's shoulders, before curling up next to his side.

"Oh," Poppy breathed, a slow grin working its way across his face, before he settled his arm around Branch's shoulders and tugged her more firmly into his side. "Yeah, you know I'm always good for cuddles," he sighed, resting his cheek against Branch's hair, more than pleased to feel her breathing even out where she was pressed against his side.

[definesanity]

Dear God: Why Are Women So Attractive?

Marian Greco is a holy woman.

Her parents taught her ever since she was a child, along with her sisters.

The exception, naturally being Ye--... Schneider.

And after the events of 1929, the two had... somehow, braved The Storm.

And Marian cursed.

But that was a tale for another day. What matters now is the problem.

Namely, because of the women of the Suitcase.

The first she met, ironically enough, was Lilya. The Russian was from a different time, and is an ace pilot.

Above all, she was pretty. And also everything against to her way of childhood.

She was loud, at times obnoxious, prideful boarding, and sometimes exceeding, arrogance, and not to mention the excess drinking...

Normally, Marian could excuse the final. In her own opinion, she believes that drinking itself is not exactly a sin, but drinking in excess, was.

Still, she could not just go up to the Russian and ask her; Marian was now Arcanist, but her powers were still yet to be fully developed...

Which made it all the more stranger when, whenever Marian is around, Lilya slows down on her drinking.

Lilya looked at Marian out of the corner of her eye. "Somethin' wrong?"

"A-Ah, no, nothing." Marian replied instinctively, before shaking her head. "...Mind, there... is."

"The drinking, right?" Lilya replied instantly, waving her flask in her hand. "I heard from Vertin you're a holy woman, so I thought I'd best not go around insulting your Lord."

"Mm. I... thank you, for that. I am still getting used to... all this."

Lilya looked at Marian fully, her eyes not filled with warmth, but not ice, either. "I'm not the one to go to for advice... but, if I had to offer some, it's this: Don't stress over every single thing, or you're gonna start stressing over stress itself.

"And before you say anything, yes, I know: It ain't easy as said as it is done. But what's the point, if you won't be able to do if you're busy worrying about saying stuff?" Lilya shrugged. "My own take, feel free to leave it."

Marian blinked in surprise, and was stunned silent for a moment. Eventually, she found her words: "You would make for a good public speaker."

Lilya snorted. "Ha! Didn't expect that! Must mean I did something right, then!"

Lilya was... interesting, to say the least.

But Marian briefly wondered why it was that she looked oddly cute, like a fluffy bear...

---------------------------------------

Marian was beginning to doubt.

It was something that gnawed at the back of her mind for ages, even before The Storm of 1929.

If God was there, why did He always give Marian and her family the hardest of trials?

She decided to sit down, and ask the worst person possible. But hey, any advice is better than none, right?

"...I'mma be honest with ya." An-An Lee said. "I ain't religious. Never have been. Ya still want my advice or...?"

Marian nodded. "Please. I... would like an outsider's perspective on it."

An-An Lee kicked back a bit, sitting on her chair with her feet on the table. "Well, let's start from that; God is granting you His most difficult challenges, right?"

A nod.

"So, let's say you were a kid, still, who would have heard numerous stories of God at this point. What would you say the reason is?"

"Because He has a plan, not just for me, but for everyone." Marian replied without hesitation. The Ghost Hunter hummed.

"And how about now?"

Marian paused to think. What would she say, now?

Her faith had been shattered the moment that she was saved and rescued, but it was her transformation into an Arcanist that really made her realise it.

God... what was His plan, in turning her into something hated by humanity, his own creations?

"...I'm not sure." came the eventual reply.

Even still, An-An Lee remained calm, and gave her a reassuring smile in response. "I'm no religious girl, but I can say that... you've got a plan yourself. And it's a good one. So, hey, don't let anyone try an' lead ya astray, la?"

Marian looked at the grinning face, and found herself smiling back.

Curses, what has she gotten herself into...?

[ilostyou]

.

[moonlightpirate]

Oh to be a starbucks customer and to complain about such trivial things I truly wish those were my biggest worries

[kindacreepy-kindaugly]

I mean I'm not goin back to him I'm not(!!!) but at this point I got no idea why

Literally just screaming into the fucking void

He already broke me to the point where all the shit he's said are my only core beliefs n even if I try to shut down the voice in my head repeatin it all I still believe every damn word

So no matter how long I cut him off for it's always there just the same. But no one else can always be there to make it go away. W/ him I at least go from a total waste of oxygen to the one thing I'll ever be any good for. It's an upgrade I can almost live with.

So what's the point? What do I or anyone gain from me stayin away?

I've been tryin so fucking hard n it's just not getting any easier. I don't know where to put all this fucking self loathing, I can't keep pouring it onto other people. I always need to keep so damn much inside n some of it still spills out n that's already bordering on too much. I don't wanna be a burden. I know everyone is, to some extent, but not like this. Not all the time. Plus they have something to give in return, I only have things no one else wants, just Val's happy to take em if offered.

I still feel the pull all the fucking time. It's like the chain he used to have around my neck but I know he's not doin the pulling, he doesn't care if he has me or not anymore. It's all me now. I'm the one who keeps wanting to go back. The rational part of me is screaming no cause I know he'll just hurt me n find new ways to cut even deeper but. What's left that he hasn't already done?

Maybe this time he'll make the feelings n the noise go away. Maybe this time he'll make it all quiet.

[thetomcruiseblr]

TW: Very Dark Topics

I am really going to actually spell out what happened because it bothers me that I haven't been able to do so, but I think enough people view me with suspicion now that I need to say it for my own sake:

I mentally broke down over what I thought were conversations making light of/romanticizing very traumatic real-world situations, of which I have had personal experience in. I was very stupid in taking its depictions in fiction very seriously. I was wrong in telling people, whom I had felt I was close to at the time, about how those topics were traumatic to me and that I disliked that they were creating content about it, and in turn, severely-mentally damaging them and making them feel terrible about their own creative works. I am very sorry for that, as obviously, they were just having fun with writing fictional scenarios. Which is why I have emphasized - time and time again this entire year - that I hope everyone just does what makes them happy. I know somebody privated(?) a fic of hers recently, and honestly - I don't think she should have. If you wrote it and were happy with what you created, you should be proud of it and display it.

I have made clear that I had the really terrible reputation of being the obnoxious anti-bottom!Bradley person (it's just a very strange, long-ago recollection to me now because I have been living in this man's rectal cavity for the past year). I would openly say that I wouldn't read fics about it, etc., and that was definitely a huge mood and conversation-killer. Of course, there are plenty of people who don't like/read bottom!Bradley, but they obviously just move on and read what they like, but I didn't because I was a moron who didn't know how to use [insert internet app] for the first time, and didn't know that I didn't have to read every single thing that crossed my screen.

Honestly, I really don't believe I was always against bottom!Bradley. I read Noora's first two fics very early on in the fandom, and they were fine and lovely to me! I think I was just much more enamored with the completely novel concept of fucking Tom Cruise at the time that I started leaning heavily into that. Bradley was always going to be fuckable to me as he was portrayed in the movie, but I was so obsessed with wanting to capture that moment of finding 58-year old Tom Cruise, whom I had never found attractive before this movie, bangable. But Bradley, in the TGM canon to me, probably could have always gotten his shit reamed out. I mean, it's my only fun now, for sure. I believe I have always had a bottom!Bradley visual preference, as that is genuinely the only thing that intrigues me to depict now (I'm switching it up currently for a friend, and honestly, it's been very hard to drag myself out of the Roosterfuck mindset).

I think when I had started very crazily associating it with a concept and memory that really terrified me (my own fault for being so brain-damaged to perceive it that way), that's when I began to openly hate it, as that was the most popular version of it. I gradually began thinking all of it was terrible and insidious - even the "acceptable" version of it, and I openly voiced it. I can't even explain how or why my brain had been so twisted, destroyed, and warped, but it had been. I was going through a lot of personal outside stress at the time, as well, and R00smav was the thing that made me happy, and when I started finding things there that I had found threatening at the time, I began really spiraling. It isn't anyone's fault but my own for taking fictional stuff so seriously, but I did not do any of it out of malice.

I have to emphasize that I don't mind any of it now. I just don't read it, like I should have always done. And honestly, on occasions out of curiosity, I have read some to test myself, and it no longer bothers me. I get it, it's a fictional fantasy that a lot of people have, and that's fine.

Furthermore, I definitely severely traumatized the person who had been the nicest and most helpful friend to me at the time by threatening to do something to myself if I wasn't able to try to do something at the time, which was utterly uncalled for. I can't imagine how horrific it was for her to read something like that, and it's something that I wish I could apologize for directly, but I can't. But I get that after that, she never wanted to be reminded that I existed again. I was just so terrified, so broken-down at the time, that I thought everything I did would be taken the wrong way, and I just desperately needed her permission to do it, even though she obviously had no authority over anything. She had just been the person who had been the kindest to me at the time, who I had considered one of my closest friends (I don't think she ever viewed me that way in turn), and I so desperately did not want her to view me as her enemy or a traitor, but I think that ended up devastatingly being the case, anyway. Which is why I have not allowed myself to think about Tom Cruise in probably five months, and I'm glad that I did it. I think I have sort of ironically healed my own brain in that way. I really did not need to take this celebrity as seriously as I did.

It's so stupid. Over fictional stuff that was supposed to be fun. I am in hell now, and I have been for a very long time. I know everyone else is having fun now, but I haven't...and I probably never will again. And I know that I probably deserve this for what I had put others through. But goddamn - I just need to say that none of it was done out of malice or ill-intent. I was just a severely-damaged person at the time, who hadn't been ready for a fandom that contained a lot of heavy fictional topics, I stupidly overreacted to them and passed my mental damage onto other people, and now I am never able to participate in the thing that I love again.

I'm saying this now because my best friend, who was one of R00smav's most prolific writers, doesn't love them anymore. I had hoped she would at least talk about them to me, but I know that everything that has happened has killed her love for them. She wrote some of the most definitive fiction for R00smav, and I can't even talk about her fics with her without feeling like I am bothering her. She wrote my favorite Bradley POV, and she doesn't love him. I just completely fucking broke down crying over this today.

I am sick of myself, and I am just so sick.