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#I love making aesthetics for people and especially this one
ceesimz · 8 hours
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Best of Both Worlds
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Yes, the title is a Hannah Montana song, it fits perfectly. Also, for the sake of fiction, Leah did in fact play at Wembley, thank you!
Possibly the most long-awaited day of Leah's life; her national team return. It was one thing to play for The Arsenal again, but to represent her country whilst wearing the captain's armband at Wembley was an experience that simply couldn't be matched. And that's why it meant everything and more to her that you were in the stands with her family and her name on your back.
It wasn't the most aesthetically pleasing match ever, a 1-1 draw against Sweden, but Leah was back in her rightful place under her rightful role, and that was a win in itself. With each step on the pitch, your heart swelled with pride, knowing the mountain she'd climbed with her injury and how hard it had been mentally with each bump in the road, especially when she had to drop out of the last camp.
But here you were, seated in the same area of the stands her family had been when she had won the Euros, watching on in awe at how seamlessly she slipped back into the team. You had missed that fateful day back in 2022, having only met Leah five months after it at a New Year's Eve party, but with the affection Leah described that day with, you may as well have lived it for yourself. Now, having experienced your first game at Wembley since you hadn't gone to that game last year, you were beaming as you watched your girl command her national team around again.
Sure, you'd been to many a game of her's before, but there was something different about this one. There were obvious reasons of course, her injury and whatnot, but seeing her lead her team out to a stadium filled with the most people she'd ever played in front of, a feeling settled in your chest that was unlike anything before. And when she was back in your arms at the end of the game, you would show her exactly how much you treasured her.
So, as she made her way around the stadium post-game, taking the time to applaud all the fans that had come along to watch and signing things for some, there was a smile of admiration on your face that her cousin beside you noticed. You blushed heavily at the teasing nudge she gave you with a smirk on her face.
"I suggest you wipe that cheesy, love-sick smile off your face before she comes over and bullies you for it." The woman next to you said, the pair of you laughing as you rolled your eyes, both all too familiar with her antics.
But the absence of said smile only lasted for about a minute, because then Leah was making her way over to the area of stands where you and her family was, and she had a down-turned smile on her face, the one she always did whilst trying to suppress her actual one. You were sat on the second row behind Leah's immediate family, so you stood back and waited for her to greet them all, also doing so as to not attract much fan attention. Leah made that hard though, because when her Mum pulled her into a bear hug, she indulged herself fully in it for about five seconds before her eyes flitted up to you and the corners of her mouth finally quirked up.
She jokingly pushed her Mum to the side so that she could reach out for you, and leaned up to hug you tightly. However, you pulled away after a few moments, and she made her disapproval very clear.
"What you doing that for?" She quizzed grumpily, looking utterly unimpressed up at you as some of her family members chuckled at her.
"The fans, Leah. We're at Wembley, think of all the videos." You whispered close to her ear, not quite intelligible for the others to hear.
"Who gives a toss, babe, I've hugged all my family here and you're no different." She responded, and she pulled you back in before you could complain. You wouldn't have complained anyway, because really who were you to deny your girlfriend's hug, your favourite in the world.
"Don't throw a strop later if there's about a million different angles of this." You teased, pinching her side where one of your hands rested around her.
"Doesn't matter, it's still you I get to go home with." She murmured before quickly pecking the spot under your ear and pulling back with one last squeeze. When she leaned back, she saw the light blush to your cheeks and smirked. "A year later and I've still got it."
You shoved her away lightly so that she could chat with the rest of her family before going off to do her post-match routine. Seeing her with her family, who she was so tight-knit with, was always a joy to see and you'd never get tired of seeing it. And as she jogged away back to the tunnel, her Mum turned to you and embraced you too.
"Thanks for coming, darling, it means a lot to her and to us too." She told you, rubbing a hand up and down your back. Praise and gratitude from her never got old either.
"Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world." You said back to her, to which she smiled and kissed your cheek.
You and the rest of the group made your way around to the family area inside the stadium to wait for her, making light conversation with them all to pass the time whilst Leah carried out media duties. It was fun and easy spending time with her family, because as a result of your girlfriend's relationship with them, you had grown almost as close with them too. Ever present at family dinners, birthdays, and events like christenings and weddings etc, now it was second nature for you to follow Leah to them. Within only a few months of being with Leah, every invite had your name on it too.
In the middle of your conversation with her cousins, talking excitedly about plans for the summer vacation later that year, you were interrupted as Leah finally appeared in her tracksuit with short wet blonde hair, a soft smile on her face. She spent a bit of time talking some more with her family, before bidding them farewell and wandering over to you.
"Home time?" You wondered, reaching a hand out to brush some of her hair back behind her shoulder.
You had, rather bravely, drove to the stadium today after Leah somehow secured you a reserved parking space, with the plan of driving yourself and Leah home your flat for the night before she travelled back up north to St. George's Park with the team tomorrow.
"God, yes." She sighed, and you smiled up at her.
"Let's go then." You took the hand she offered after pulling up her hood and let her lead the way out of the stadium.
Arriving at your car, with a few curious stares from fans to see if the hooded figure beside you was who they thought it was, you helped her lift her things into the boot of your car before the pair of you clambered in.
For the time it took to drive home, you caught up with her as it had been a few days since you had seen each other whilst she had been at camp. You, ever the safe driver, weren't one to hold your girlfriend's hands whilst on the road, always with two hands on the wheel at all times. Leah teased you of course, her and her English humour never falling to banter you everytime she could, but nevertheless when she was feeling a little clingy her hand would rest on your thigh as you drove, or it would massage and stroke the back of your neck as her arm leaned on your seat's headrest.
Today was a case of her resting a hand mindlessly on your thigh, something you would smile at constantly and glance down at the sight every chance you could get. She didn't notice though, busy talking and too tired to realise. Adjusting back to playing 90 minutes was something she was still in the middle of, not that she couldn't handle them because she obviously can, it's just the tiredness afterwards was something she hadn't experienced in a while of playing professionally.
That meant you weren't exactly surprised when she flopped down immediately on your sofa when you got home, not even bothering to drop her bags off in your room.
"Want some food, love?" You offered, pushing her bags to the side of the hallway so that they weren't a tripping hazard before leaning against the doorway of your lounge.
"You don't have to cook, we can just order a Nando's or something." Leah yawned, rubbing her eyes.
"Well, I thought ahead." You smiled at her, giggling at the tired and confused expression she silently responds with. "I meal-planned for you. I can heat up a plate of that Carribbean chicken and rice and veg if you want."
She gazed at you for a few moments before her head dropped back against the pillows with a groan.
"If I had a ring right now, I'd ask to marry you."
With a laugh, you took that as a yes and headed to the kitchen to do exactly as you said. As you were gone, the blonde put Netflix on the TV and chose the sitcom you had been watching together before pausing the episode to wait for you. She sat up with a groan and slumped back heavily, going onto her phone to reply to some friends and family.
Not so long later, you walked back in with Leah's food, handing it to her before sitting down beside her. Plate and fork in hand, she twisted her body to lean her back against your shoulder and happily tucked into her meal as you pressed play on the TV.
"Thanks for this, babe, I'm really grateful." She muttered as she ate, to which you smiled and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
"It's no problem, Le. I made a plate for myself too but I had a hot dog at half-time so I'm not hungry." You revealed, giggling as Leah chuckled.
"I know it's just a plate of food but... I don't know, means a lot to me that you thought about this." With a light blush, you shrugged nonchalantly and kissed the side of her head.
"I would say I know you'd do the same for me, but everybody knows you can't cook." You jested, grinning when she grumbled under her breath.
"I was only being nice, but alright." She huffed, but you only held her tighter against you.
"I'm kidding. I just love you, s'all. Wanna take care of you, especially after the last year and especially because I know you're a bit of a bottomless pit after a game." You say, and she hums in agreement. "If I'd have known my chicken was so good, it inspired thoughts of marriage, I'd have made it more often."
"I could never say no to that."
You both fell silent at that, more than content to enjoy each other's company with the show on in the background. Spending time with you after a game, just relaxing together, was fastly becoming Leah's favourite tradition. Going to dinners with friends or partying were great, but not much could beat this. Great food with even better company, in the arms of her girlfriend, Leah was finally at peace with the silence she had to greet after a game that was anything but.
That was something not many people would guess was a struggle in women's football. Going from playing in tiny stadiums to bigger venues but hardly any fans, to then playing in sold-out game after sold-out game for both club and country, that was her dream. What she wasn't expecting was the mental challenge that came with it. Spending well over 90 minutes in a booming stadium with fans that never ceased their chants was astounding to her, but the silence that met her when she would go home to a quiet and empty apartment was difficult.
She had worked on dealing with it better since the Euros where it had really picked up, but there was one thing that made it so much easier every time without fail. And that was you.
"You know I do plan to marry you, right?" Leah piped up out of nowhere sometime later, her plate long discarded to the coffee table as your positions on the couch remained the same. At her out-of-the-blue question that took your breath away a little, you cleared your throat and nodded though she couldn't see you.
"Yeah."
"Because I do want to marry you one day. I've known that from early on, I actually know the exact moment I thought that."
"Do tell, my love." You smiled, never one to pass up on a chance to hear just how and when Leah had fallen for you.
"The second time we saw each other after the New Year's party, when you started teasing me for not kissing you again after that night."
Much to Alex's dismay, the night of that party yourself and Leah had spent pretty much all of it talking about everything and nothing, compelled by a desire to get to know each other. That was until the blonde's intake of Dutch courage lived up to its name as she kissed you a little more than what could be described as friendly once the clock struck midnight. And when the night ended, no matter how much you didn't want to leave, you both shared a taxi to your respective apartments and exchanged details. It wasn't long before you saw her again though, in fact you saw her twice in the two weeks that followed, but the defender had been a little too embarrassed at her eager act a few weeks prior to kiss you again. But when you teased her one too many times about it, on the third 'date', she huffed before firmly yet delicately gripping your face and finally kissing you again.
"I spoke to Wally after our second date and she called me crazy for knowing I'd marry you when I didn't even have the balls to kiss you again." You laughed loudly at that, a notion Leah soon joined in with as she knew her past-self had acted in a ridiculous and shy way. "But that's the truth, babe. I knew I had to have you, and what better way to show that than snogging the life out of you on a random bench in London."
"Ew, Leah! Why describe it like that? I thought it was such a sweet moment, but you've just described it like we were two horny teenagers." She grimaced at the point you made, regretting it already.
"My bad. It was sweet. If not a bit... desperate." She snickered, grinning when you swatted her shoulder. "So, would you marry me then?"
"Wow. If this conversation couldn't get any less romantic, I think you've just put the nail in the coffin." Leah scoffed and sat up, fixing you with a disapproving look.
"That wasn't my actual proposal, you knob. I just wanna know if you'd say yes when I did eventually ask. Properly, that is." The defender asked with a shy smile, and you couldn't help but giggle at her face, doing so more when she frowned in confusion.
"Yes, I would accept your proposal. As long as it's with a nice ring and a better speech." You answered to put her out of her misery. She lets out a relieved sigh but smiling again.
"Noted."
With that, she stood up, now your turn to be confused. Squealing as she lifted you up bridal style, you laughed when she lay you down on your back length-ways across the sofa. Then, she kneeled against the cushions under your knees and carefully laid on top of you, her head resting against your stomach. Her hands came up to slide under your back and she sighed contently.
"Comfy?" You asked with a smile, your own hands settling on the back of her head.
"So comfy." She hummed, eyes closed as she faced away from the TV.
"If you're gonna fall asleep, Le, we may as well go to bed."
"No." She grunted. "I won't fall asleep. I just want to lay here for a bit."
"Alright." You conceded, your attention fully lost from the TV and instead on the girl draped over you.
You admired the slight view of her face available to you, your hands combing delicately through her almost dried hair as the only sounds shared between you were the calm and quiet breaths you both let out. A few minutes passed by and you thought she had gone to sleep, but she proved you wrong.
"This is my dream, you know."
"What is?" You asked her, moving one of your hands to rest on the side of your face and stroking her skin there with your thumb.
"Going home from a game to someone I love. Who I can fully switch off with." The small explanation had you beaming, beyond happy to hear how special you were to her.
"Well, I'm glad I can help, my love." You replied, a sheepishly proud smile on your face.
"I used to find it hard, y'know... our football blew up in popularity during the Euros, and I struggled with it more than I expected." You hummed curiously, not wanting to disrupt her train of thought but letting her know you wanted her to continue. "Going from being surrounded by up to ninety thousand people, singing and chanting and cheering non-stop, to just... nothing when I got home. Just a cold, empty, silent apartment. The contrast of it troubled me a lot. I worked through it with a psychologist and coped with it better, but it was never perfect."
She paused, adjusting her position so that her hands came to rest under her chin as she looked up at you, that same down-turned smile from earlier returning. Your hands fell to clasp behind her neck, waiting for her to elaborate.
"Then you came around, and now that anxiety doesn't even phase me anymore."
Now, if that wasn't the most heart-warming thing your girlfriend had said so far, you weren't sure what was.
"That makes me so happy, Leah." You whispered, cupping her cheeks with your hands and smiling softly at her.
"One of my favourite things about our relationship is how easy it is for me to switch from Leah Williamson the footballer, to just Leah when I'm around you. Makes coming home after a game much easier."
Shaking your head, you took her hands and urged her to move further up your body so that her head rested against your chest. Wrapping your arms around her, you squeezed her tightly, desperate to convey your love to her in a way words couldn't explain.
"I'll happily welcome 'Just Leah' home all the time."
"Now you're ruining the moment."
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fandomfucker · 7 hours
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obsessed w ur rhea ripley imagines !! i wanted to req rhea headcanons with a photographer gf whos pretty well known for her pics on socials and is rly just like a quiet nature girlie if that makes sense .. like imagine if all of a sudden instead of the usual weekly aesthetic photo dump u just see badass rhea shots on the ring LMFAO
I love this one! It's a little short but I think it's cute.
Also, disclaimer-I don't own any of these pictures used and the format is from canva so nobody sue me please😣🤞
Your fans were absolutely baffled
Some of them knew who Rhea was but the rest were all just kinda like “who in the fuck is that” when you started posting her
You're a pretty private person when it comes to your own social media at least so you just didn't say anything about it
Rhea thought this was absolutely hilarious, especially the fact that you never tagged her or WWE or anybody to make a full connection
Obviously people went through who you follow and found Rheas account
Rhea who wanted to continue the befuddlement of your fans and only occasionally posted you, also not ever saying anything
You kinda sprinkled in the pictures to your feed so it wasn't all just Rhea, more of a soft launch than anything but since nobody had any idea it was actually a harder launch than Shourtney
I feel like you have a specific kind of style, no matter what your pictures look like
This is kind of a before and after of your Instagram
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People def knew you were dating by now, mainly because of the hearts in your bio but the two of you thought it was funnier to just, never confirm
Until Rhea was questioned in an interview if the two of you were dating
“Yeah.” *Shrug*
Crowd looses their minds
“I FUCKING TOLD YOU”
“How long?!”
“Almost a year.”
“WHAT??!!”
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nitw · 18 hours
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Do you have fursona designing advice
HMMMM WELL while i've gone through quite a few sonas throughout the years (mostly different animals including but not limited to: a bumblebee/bear hybrid, a cat, a tiger, a dragon, etc) my current sona is the one i put the most thought into. that being said, my guy is 1) pretty basic in terms of colors and patterns, 2) about as self-indulgent as it gets =w= some people go off the rails with their details and i think that's awesome, but i came to realize that i wouldn't identify as strongly with my sona if it looked too otherworldly if that makes sense
a few tips based on this:
think about whether you want your fursona to be a representation of your ideal/alternate self, or more just like a character of their own. this might make it easier to decide on the aesthetic!! because personally while i Love me a good pastel sparkledog, that wouldn't feel as accurate for myself
DON'T BE INTIMIDATED WHEN IT COMES TO PICKING A SPECIES. this can be difficult sometimes, but try not to stress over it too much. you don't even have to limit yourself to a real life animal! there are no rules, make up your own funky species if you want! combine elements of your favorite animals to get the best of both worlds! and who's to say you can't just change their species later if you get bored? they'll love you all the same!!
can't/don't want to draw them yourself? lots of furry artists out there (especially those that do reference sheet commissions) are willing to help you figure out a proper design as long as you can provide a few basic ideas (that's what i did!) tbh this goes for commissions in general but i can't stress this enough: don't feel embarrassed about sending in a 3-minute ms paint doodle, or a color palette, or an image collage, or ANYTHING else to the artist you're commissioning!!! in my experience people tend to be cool with it, and i know it's wayyy more helpful than text descriptions alone. seriously, compile whatever visual references you can find, i'm sure they'd be happy to help you figure out the design!
have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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mindstriker · 2 days
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pspspsps I have not played BG3 but I’d listen to you get on the soapbox about Astarion and Gale and Lae’zel. :] I love the vampire…twink(?) and hearing good things about that Gale guy and the frog(?) lady who makes my gender kinda start buzzing like a cicada <3
THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN, AND HOW NOW SO SHALL I.
Seriously though, thanks for giving me an excuse to yap. As much as I am an enjoyer of fandom shipping, I am also a friendmaxxing visitorpilled individual and while I'm a strong proponent of pretty much every Baldur's Gate 3 Origin character being friends to some degree, I have my favourites, and Lae'zel, Gale, and Astarion are a trio I find particularly compelling. Maybe just because my first playthrough I exclusively travelled with them and loved their shared dialogue. So! THE DYNAMIC (as I see it.)
This is gonna be a long post. Oops.
Gale + Astarion
The one that I like equally as a romantic and platonic venture. I'm gonna be real, I tend to like these two as an actual romantic pairing- but that's irrelevant here. I've been over the lighter reasons why I think they'd be the ultimate pompous wine aunts of the group before, but there's a bit more to it than that.
Asides from shared aesthetic and literary interests, when I say I think they like each other in a surprisingly uncomplicated way despite their personal complexities, I truly do mean it that way. I feel that Gale is the type of person Astarion could truly come to cherish as a friend, once he's in a better place personally. He's startlingly authentic, giving Astarion a space to be as well, should he wish, rather than keep up his entirely charming facade- kind to others while also being... morally flexible enough to pique Astarion's interest and to avoid making him feel like he's being monitored by someone TOO well-intentioned (because I love Astarion, but he IS a bit of a bastard and will be forever, I reckon). On Gale's front, I genuinely think a part of him would feel incredibly vindicated by having a friend in Astarion- someone who would unabashedly encourage his ambitions and wilder interests (but whom I believe would still have his best interests vaguely at heart). Obviously that can take a darker turn under some scenarios- but I like to think that Astarion's playfulness and willingness to embrace his curiosity and passion about the stranger and more... reckless side of his work could be freeing to him. Like having that one friend that finally listens to you when you say "hear me out" and only intervenes if it's a TRULY bad take. Someone he can actually be mischevious with- because Gale IS a bit of a little shit himself, when he's given the freedom to be without guilt.
Gale + Lae'zel
This is the unusual friendship that I go the hardest about. I am so normal about them and what they could mean to each other. Lae'zel is incredibly dismissive of Gale initially, as she is with most of the others- but she's incredibly soft towards him by gith standards starting from the moment he demonstrates genuine respect and curiosity towards her and her people. Assessing his physical combat skills as less-than-deal shortly after meeting him, she even goes so far as to offer to *literally* train him in gith combat tactics shortly into your journey. That is not an offer I think Lae'zel makes lightly, or out of pragmatism alone. Is it because she sees him as weak? Yes. But it's also because she sees him as capable enough to become stronger, and worth training so that he is no LONGER weak. Most githyanki would not do that for another, especially one they had not met. Lae'zel is incredibly kind and giving to the others from the get-go no matter what anyone says about her "attitude"- putting her life and the code of ethics she lives by on the ropes to help a bunch of outsiders from the very start- but she is especially so to him, someone which many of her people may have outright discarded as useless.
From there, she starts to answer some of his questions. I like to think he talks to her about Faerun in turn for every question he asks- recognizing that the earth is as alien to her as she is to it. That's a good start for any friendship, really- mutual curiosity.
And then it gets stronger, as their personal struggles are revealed. The moment Lae'zel begins to waver in her faith and her dedication to Vlaakith is right around the same moment she hotly declares Mystra a fool for "demanding that Gale place all her faith in her and giving him none in return". She defends him against a literal god, declaring him capable and part of a mighty group- a stunning turn from her initial assessment. She balks at the idea of sacrificing him when she believes so firmly that it's an unnecessary waste of a skilled man. Possibly one she now considers a friend.
They are, in many ways, similar. Groomed in different senses by gods/god-like powers that only sought to milk them for all they were worth and then discard them when convenient. Manipulators of a celestial variety- the type of people who leave you with the realization that your entire life has been wasted serving them. Both of them were even wanted for their power- Laezel for her unwavering loyalty and militant prowess, Gale for his magical ability.
So, TLDR: They have, from the beginning, connected to each other via mutual understanding. They go through shocking life changes together and find solace in finding understanding in someone whose struggle initially seemed so alien to the other. From there, I feel like they'd genuinely find more casual things to bond over as Lae'zel discovers her enjoyment of Faerun and its wonders. No one would go ham over having a friend newly excited to learn about the world than Gale "could talk at length about anything" Dekarios.
Astarion + Lae'zel
This doesn't seem right at first, right? Poncey (lovingly) vampire meets unwaveringly stoic alien warrior. Except there's something ruthless and downright STURDY about Astarion that I can see Lae'zel quietly appreciating from the beginning. She can tell that he's willing to go the distance- even if they butt heads over her revulsion concerning the tadpoles and Astarion's attempts to wheedle the group into using them for their own gain. I feel like respect is shockingly easily earned for him on her front. In turn, I feel like Astarion is quite wary of her first- but honestly? He might be vaguely assuaded by the fact that Gale, arguably the most vulnerable of them all, just seemingly wanders around chatting with her intermittently without losing any limbs or being verbally abused. He also definitely clocks right off the bat in that scheming way of his that she'd be an incredibly helpful ally to have.
Except she's not easily seduced, or swayed by charm and friendly platitudes. Instead, I think the thing Lae'zel would silently begin to appreciate about him first is the subtle ways he shows interest in the world around him- his dialogue about not remembering how much colour there was in the world, and the like. As someone who's learning to love her new surroundings bit by bit, I can see her sympathizing with his newfound adoration of the daylight and outdoors he was deprived of for so long.
Later, she wholeheartedly supports Astarion's campaign to be rid of Cazador, and he even gleefully states "good for her" when she decides to turn her back on Vlaakith- so I reckon they're another check on the front of "friends bonding over overthrowing those who have been unrighteously in charge of them for so long". The circumstances are highly different, but the sentiment is shared: fuck that guy, I won't be their puppet anymore.
Finally, in the ending where Lae'zel chooses to stay on Faerun and forge her own fate exploring a new world, I can see her and Astarion working together- both enjoying their newfound freedom from cause and control and absorbing all the joys of a *functionally* new world for the both of them. With the aid of their far more local wizard friend who's less prone to the battlefield, of course. I can see them teaming up for a glorious adventure or two easily. Battle buddies, and the like.
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rinrinlovee · 2 years
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I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you monochrome I hate you rose gold I hate you painting kids’ toys to be joyless I hate you soulless white kitchens I hate you stainless steel I hate you exposed framing I hate you pristine white sofas I hate you parents who force their children to live in environments with no colour I hate you organised houses I hate you echoey houses I hate you perfectly cut emerald grass I hate you biscuit cutter houses I hate you conformity I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic !!
#MAKE IT STOP#I WANT COLOUR#I want lived in houses !!#I want to trip over dolls and have blankets all over and have a painted kitchens I love you homely homes#I want to hear laughter and see footprints and little height markers on door frames I want to see that splatter on the ceiling#from when grandma dropped that pot of spaghetti I NEED to see signs of life and happiness and love#If I don’t see a thriving household with toys on the floor and chew marks on the furniture and dents in the walls and dishes in the sink#I AM GOING TO COMBUST#This aesthetic is the definition of soulless! A terrible threat to humanity! It needs to be eradicated immediately!! I directly attribute#how rude people are nowadays to the stark and complete lack of colour and soul in stores and jokes alike!#Whoever thought of this so called aesthetic is the devil’s best pawn!!#If I see one more house with children especially drowned in white and black I’m calling every child protective service imaginable#Few things boil my blood more than a parent forcing their child to live in such a horrid non stimulating cold freakishly clean environment#If I can hear my quiet breathing in your house#It needs to be cleansed if it’s modern aesthetic sin and injected with the borderline holy rays of WARM#Yes I did just watch a HORRIBLE VILE TERRIBLE video of some trendy yummy mummy painting her child’s lovely lavender play kitchen#BLOODY BLACK AND WHITE#to make it match her aesthetic!#what the fuck!! I call child abuse !
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batemanofficial · 8 months
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hello upper middle class northern usamerican tumblr user. i want to play a game. you will notice that you are in a super america convenience store in rural kentucky - you have three minutes to purchase a snack and drink of your choice and make normal small talk with the cashier. however, if you use the word "cryptid" or generally make reference to appalachia and its inhabitants as "wild", uncivilized, or lacking restraint around alcoholic beverages during your time here, i will personally tie you to the chassis of a four wheeler and tip it into the river. live or die. make your choice
#speak friend and enter#i can appreciate mothman as much as the next guy but can we stop treating appalachia like it's the subject of a richard attenborough doc#i come from a long line of hillbillies and i like to think i've got a good sense of humor about it but sometimes i am tested#like. this is not a lawless land with a moonshine still in every holler and nameless voices in the woods!! this is a normal town!!#idk maybe i'm reading too much into it but i'm just tired of the cultural fetishization of appalachia by people who aren't from here#and who don't know anything about it. like yeah you know mothman and what hooch is and that's all well and good#but do you know what the opioid epidemic really is. do you know about the structural injustices that keep people like mcconnell in power#i'm not saying you have to apply dialectical political analysis to every issue that occurs in the region to be able to have an opinion#but also like. i'm tired of people looking at places like where i grew up and making them into things they aren't#like. on the one hand we have ''ooh spooky hills!! run if you hear the trees whisper your name''#and on the other we've got ''isn't appalachia so depressing...so hashtag ethel cain core...shame it's got no value beyond aesthetics''#and on yet another hand we have ''i - a person with no ties to the region - am going to take up the cause of every social issue#occurring across the entire appalachian region so the world will see just how bad these poor hill people have it. i am very smart''#and like. it's frustrating#i'm not saying you should never speak about appalachia if something we have is interesting to you#nor am i implying that i want to gatekeep discussion of the region's issues to the community bc that won't accomplish anything#i'm just saying that like any place it's complex. it's got its good things and it's got its bad things.#and you shouldn't isolate the good from the bad or vice versa - especially if you don't know the context in which those things happen.#and for the love of god dont let your own ignorance cause you to boil down those issues into a reductive and inaccurate set of stereotypes#learn about us from us. not from tiktok not from movies and for christ's sake not from hillbilly elegy. i hate that fucking book#anyway that got weirdly serious but i mean it. putting appalachia as a talking point up on the shelf until y'all can speak intelligently#ok to rb
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icewindandboringhorror · 10 months
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my personal Media Genres tier ranking and also Neopets Species tiers. put together in the same post just due to being adjacently related because they're on the same website lol
links to the specific tier makers: Media Genres --- Neopets
#(might have to right click open image in new tab to zoom and see some of them. tumblr always makes screenshots tiny)#Also I think this is why I have trouble finding things to watch/just don't watch media very often since I'm so so so hyper specific and#particular that I just end up disliking or neutrally not caring about like.. SO MANY things ghfg#Even being aware of my particular-ness I was still surprised to see how many were in the 'dislike' and 'not care' categories lol#Also it is so so so hard being an Action and Romance genre hater YET being a Fantasy and Historical genre lover ghhjb#EVERY fantasy story is also an action romance.. every historical story is a romance.. ouch oof taking psychic damage always#KIND of like how I LOOOOVE point and click mystery puzzle games but I also generally dislike the horror genre#but many point and click puzzle games I used to see would have horror elements or be 'scary' in some way#and it's like HHRgghh.. I just want to navigate a creepy old dilapidated mansion collecting secret codes from books but NOT in a scary way!#just like I want fantasy & historical content but NOT in an action romance way!!#Also.. NEOPETS.. I think my two favorites are both one of the most common choices and also one of the least lol#like EVERYONE loves aishas pretty much. I think they even won a favorite neopets poll on tumblr. But then nobody talks about vandagyres#or even cares about them (seemingly) and they have like so few clothes or good options because they're just irrelevant apparently#also I know it seems very uncharacteristic for the neopet that's basically A Cat to not be in my favorites but I just gjhjhbj#the eyebrows of the wocky bother me. it doesn't match everything else. Even in different paintrbsuh colors it will be#nice and cohesive and pastel or something and then two big dark lines. I aesthetically love thick dark eyebrows on people it just looks wei#rd on a cartoon cat. ANYWAY.. fun to think about#I love ranking things always#also curious to know if anyone has similar opinions... my fellow vandagyre lovers.. and action movie haters.. cutthroat kitchen fans.. :0c#AND as someone tired of romance in general & ESPECIALLY cardboard cutout cishet romances. yes I would of course like to see more lgbtq+#stories in media etc. The genre is just not placed higher because so much seems to be Modern Young Adult Romance which of course I hate#those themes lol.. We need some drama comedies with a cast of gay 300yr old elves in victorian costume. please.. ghjgj.. (and like ACTUAL#300 yr olds. NOT 'is immortal bt still acts like an irrational 15yr old bc plot'. what abt jaded eccentric elder romance? hmM? lol) ANYWAY#always manifesting a 'high fantasy historical mystery comedy drama satire psychological character study (with vampires)' into existence lol#if I could make a tv show set in my world... the sheer power I would have.. and nobody would watch it because it would have NO action or#romance (at least none that was serious/was not framed as lame/goofy/comedic) & would have intricate complicated worldbuilding and be very#VERY broadly unmarketable.. but I would finally have a show that meets my tastes lol
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depresseddepot · 2 years
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hello I've started watching drag race after years of watching trixie and katya and I just have to say. every second katya is on screen I love her more and more
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invictarre-archive · 1 year
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time to re-paste my tags and tag everything I’ve been getting lazy with  :))))))))
can’t wait for these to get deleted !!!!!!!!!!
#dear queen of hearts; let me grow you red roses so you can learn how to be kind | out of character#hard and fast shines the grin that we flash; but there's a vulnerable stripe or two on me | musings#you can learn a lot of things from the flowers; for especially in the month of June | inbox memes#let us together see how high we can fly before the sun melts the wax in our wings | dash commentary#pull the sword from the stone and start forging your own legendary stories | headcanons#I've found fame to be a fickle food; lying delicately across an ever shifting plate | aesthetics#all the parts combine to one with all of us around the sun; everything will fall away; make order from the disarray | worldbuilding#I can make it easy; I can take the lead. if you think they're looking at you; they're looking at me | answered ask#owo ??? what's this ????? *notices your post* | saved#there's no such thing as time to kill or time to throw away | dash games#every fight has its costs that we've had to pay; all won by the strength of the party we've made | muse relevant imagery#under a canopy of stars where thought and truth divorce; in that latticework of dreams we are guiltless | dani x leon#I think we deserve a soft epilogue my love; we are good people and we've both suffered enough | v: galar's golden boy#up where the mountains meet the heavens above; out where the lightning splits the sea | v: vientown ranger#through the rain and the storm and the flood I can feel their approach like a fire in my blood | v: treasure town trio#edge of glory; write your story; seize the moment with no regrets | v: my hero academia#and the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoon; little boy blue and the man in the moon | npcs: arthur brandt-muriell#and it feels like flying out of fool's paradise; I'll leave them in their cages and rise to shining heights | v: a new chapter#we can outshine the sun; we need only believe that two stars shine brighter than one | v: childhood
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faggy--butch · 14 days
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is it just me or is the "trans guys are just some boring guys and they make lame music and trans women are cool and interesting and make loud music" jokes almost like. an excuse for why theres not that many trans guys who are popular content creators or musicians or actors or authors or what have you. like blaming the invisibility of trans men on being "boring" and therefore not doing anything rather than oppression.
not to mention the example of music being that people have heard of one singular trans guy who works in a genre they dont like [people really love to act like cavetown is like specifically bad or cringe but thats just what most indie pop/rock/folk sounds like] and theyve heard of a handful of trans women who make hyperpop that they already like [and laura jane grace of course] and its really telling on themselves. theres trans guys making hyperpop and trans women making ""lame ukulele music"" and both of them and nonbinary people making music of tons of other genres. like. cmon. it reminds me of xkcd 385.
also i dont think these jokes are intentionally malicious or anything [most of the time] but it also feels sort of weird to be joking about how boring a group of marginalized people are. im not going to act like its the biggest deal in the world but its sort of low level bullying, innit? and i imagine having this weird expectation to be "cool and interesting" isnt fun for trans women either. its nice to get to be lame sometimes.
Yeah it's super weird, especially because it's repeated over and over, that part is the suspicious part. I even saw it on reddit a few days ago in one of the ftm subs. I do think it's like blaming the lack of trans men artists on trans men being "boring" instead of, you know the bigotry, the erasure, the inequality I think it's also a weird expectation that we all HAVE to live up to what other people think of as "cool" like if we're all not making hardcore metal and being as "SICK" as humanly possible, we are failing at transgender music and therefore are the reason trans men aren't represented as artists enough, which is ummm. okay.
why can't we make soft love songs about being bugs, or whatever. What happens to trans women who don't live up to the metal hardcore aesthetic? Look at Dylan Mulvaney. She made a dumb cutsie girlypop song and everyone acted like she is the founder of misogyny herself. So not only are we ridiculed for the music we make, we're trapped in transphobic expectations of what music we can or should make.
If you expect all trans women to make metal, you'll only see trans women who make metal, if you expect all trans men to make soft music, that's all you'll find! because that's all you looked for! Another thing is like, Oh all trans women music is cool and hardcore rock and roll, but trans men music is dumb and cutsie ukulele music? I wonder what gender those genres are normally associate with? Uhoh we're doing a sexism maybe the person making the joke doesn't have malicious intent, but the joke itself sure does.
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astrow1zar6 · 3 months
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Astro Observations (Beauty indicators)- 27
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Degrees in the 5th degree: known as a big sex appeal placement. These people naturally draw attention to themselves effortlessly especially on the asc. They could be wearing a bag and will have ppl still staring and asking for their number. They can get famous for their beauty.
Neptune in the 1st house: they kinda look like their wearing a filter naturally.. like their appearance is abnormally smooth and glossy, they have a very otherworldly look to them that will make others turn back for a second look. They all look like angels. They can have very dreamy personalities as well they know how to mirror other’s desires back to them which can create an almost hypnotic effect on others. (Marilyn Monroe had this)
Venus in 1st house: they give that conventional insta baddie look usually. But no seriously these people can easily become famous for their beauty fast on social media. They have such friendly charming personalities and genuinely enjoy being around others which adds to the charm. They normally put a lot of effort into looking good.
Libra Rising: I think this one is pretty self explanatory lol. These people are really easy to spot they normally have amazing fashion sense, regardless of their aesthetic they pull of whatever they wear so nicely. They dress like story book characters. Just a main character placement
Lilith conjunct asc: these people are also so angelic to look at. I feel like many ppl expect these people to be covered in tattoos and piercings and dark makeup (however they definitely could) but I mostly see that they have such an innocent beautiful appearance normally, the edginess is more through the vibe they give off which causes a lot of people to become obsessed with them. They look so sweet & innocent yet you can sense how much power these people hold within themselves. This can make them very intimidating but insanely attractive!
Libra Venus: they never usually have a hard time finding a partner due to their refined nature. These are people truly in love with love, their willingness to find love in others can be really attractive to the opposite sex (or same sex) which will cause them to have a lot of suitors normally. Their appearance is always so put together and they have such a perfect face for makeup! They tend to have very beautiful smiles as well.
Capricorn rising: talk about face card, these people normally look like models. They have amazing bone structure and are very petite themselves. This can give more an edgy dark beauty. They remind me of a sculpted Greek statue very emotionless and still yet so beautiful to look at.
Venus in 2nd house: giving princess vibes. These people are the definition of pretty privilege. Men will just buy them things for looking cute. Usually has an amazing fashion sense. They have very wealthy personalities, even if they weren’t raised rich they talk like they came from a lot of uk what I mean. Their power is really in their voice they have the most seductive voices my lord, this is what can attract so much wealthy partners. Amazing sweet talkers.
Venus in Taurus: give such a natural beauty. These people give coconut girl aesthetic with the natural tanned faces, effortlessly messy beach wave hair. These people just radiate beauty. The most beautiful thing about these people is their feminine qualities and their ability to know what they want for themselves. This can make them ideal wife’s to many. They are usually into classical feminine activities such as clothes making, cooking/baking, knitting, making jewelry. They give perfect conventional wife vibes.
Aphrodite in the 1st and 7th house: I feel like the first house is pretty self explanatory but these natives are usually known for their beauty like Venus in the 1st house. Many famous models have this placement (Adriana Lima) they have the most symmetrical features, these were the kids that never had an ugly/awkward phase. The 7th house makes you attractive to others around you. You can be seen as extremely charming and likable in your social engagements with others you can become very popular fast. However this attracts a lot of enemies and jealousy from others because of how liked you are by others. People almost worship you like a goddess. When I think of Aphrodite in the 7th I think of “the birth of Venus” painting where she’s emerging out of the claim and everyone around her is in awe, that’s what this placement is like.
Venus in 7th house: usually have such beautiful personalities. Even if they aren’t physically attractive they have such charming personalities that they are still seen as very attractive. These people are also really funny and good at engaging the opposite sex (or the same whatever you’re into) they attract so much attention from others romantically even if they are the least attractive in the room. They can pull some pretty attractive partners as well! And if they do happen to be physically attractive then they probably steal all the men😂 lowkey a little jealous of this placement! You guys are just so cool.
Pisces moons: they get known for their beauty pretty often. I feel like everyone has a crush on them ESPECIALLY the men with this placement. The men with this placement tend to sweep women away like a fictional character, they’re usually amazing with sweet talk. They also tend to look otherworldly too and others can get really obsessed with them. (Bjorn Anderson was a Pisces moon).
Cancer moons: they are all so pretty and feminine 🥺 they usually have a very doll-like appearance and a very warm aura. They know how to make others feel at home which is really attractive. They usually have soft feminine features and have a natural glow to them like the moon! They have such a motherly energy to them you just want them to mother you. Also very emotionally intelligent. These are amazing people to go to when you just need to vent, they’re the best listeners and comforters. Their softness attracts so many people to them.
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demontobee · 9 months
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Good Omens is queering TV/storytelling - part 1: GAZE
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I would argue that part of why Good Omens is so refreshingly queer is because it does not cater to the male gaze (which centers around the preferences - aesthetic, romantic, sexual, visual, logical, emotional, political ... - of mainly white men in positions of power):
no oversexualization of groups or types of people: Women or characters that could be read as female presenting are not overly sexualized. In fact, some of them are shown to be grimy, slimy and not sexual at all. All of them are real characters and not just cardboard-cutout on-screen versions of male misogynistic fantasies. They portray real people with real people problems. They are human, or exempt from our categories when portraying angels or demons. There are no overly sexualized bodies in general (as has so far also often been the case with young gay men, PoC, etc.), no fetishization of power imbalances, and not exclusively youthful depiction of love and desire.
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sex or sexual behavior is not shown directly (yet): All imagery and symbolism of sex and sexuality is used not to entice the audience but is very intimately played out between characters, which makes it almost uncomfortable to watch (e.g., Aziraphale being tempted to eat meat, Crowley watching Aziraphale eat, the whole gun imagery).
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flaunting heteronormativity: Throughout GO but especially GO2, there is very little depiction of heterosexual/romantic couples; most couples are very diverse and no one is making a fuss about it. There is no fetishization of bodies or identities. Just people (and angels and demons) being their beautiful selves (or trying to).
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age: Even though Neil Gaiman explained that Crowley and Aziraphale are middle-aged because the actors are, I think it is also queering the idea of romance, love and desire existing mainly within youthful contexts. Male gaze has taught us that young people falling and being in love is what we have to want to see, and any depiction of love that involves people being not exactly young anymore is either part of a fetishized power imbalance (often with an older dude using his power to prey on younger folx) or presents us with marital problems, loss of desire, etc. – all with undertones of decay and patronizing sympathy. Here, however, we get a beautifully crafted, slow-burn, and somehow super realistic love story that centers around beings older than time and presenting as humans in their 50s figuring out how to deal with love. It makes them both innocent and experienced, in a way that is refreshing and heartbreaking and unusual and real.
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does not (exclusively) center around romantic/sexual love: I don’t know if this is a gaze point exactly but I feel like male gaze and resulting expectations of what a love story should look like are heavily responsible for our preoccupation with romantic/sexual love in fiction – the “boy gets girl” type of story. And even though, technically, GO seems to focus on a romantic love story in the end, it is also possible to read this relationship but also the whole show as centering around a kind of love that goes beyond the narrow confines of our conditioned boxed-in thinking. It seems to depict a love of humanity and the world and the universe and just the ineffability of existence as a whole.
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disability as beautiful and innate to existence: Disability is represented amongst angels by the extremely cool Saraqael and by diversely disabled unnamed angels in the Job minisode. Representation of disability is obviously super important in its own right, but is also queers what we perceive as aesthetically and ontologically "normal". Male gaze teaches us that youth and (physical and mental) health are the desirable standard and everything else is to be seen as a deviance, a mistake. By including disability among the angels, beings that have existed before time and space, the show clearly states that disability is a beautiful and innate part of existence.
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gender is optional/obsolete: Characters like Crowley, Muriel and others really undermine the (visual and aesthetic) boundaries of gender and the black-and-white thinking about gender that informs male gaze. Characters cannot be identfied simply as (binary) men or women anymore just by looking at them or by interpreting their personalities or behaviors. Most characters in GO, and especially the more genderqueer ones, display a balance of feminine and masculine traits as well as indiosyncracies that dissolve the gender binary.
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Feel free to add your own thoughts on this in the comments or tags!
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harmoonix · 9 months
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╔═══❖•ೋ ೋ•❖═══╗
Iconic Astrology Notes Part II
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⊰᯽⊱┈──╌❊╌──┈⊰᯽⊱
✵ - The ascendant in your ascendant persona chart shows how you are inside, how you act more Inside while your natal ascendant shows how you are on the outside ( it works for me so much🌃)
✵ - Eris asteroid (136199) aspecting ascendant SHOWS big power for standing up for yourself, no one can tell you what to do honestly
✵ - Also Eris asteroid aspecting the Venus cannot stand when someone messes up with their partners, like they are top biggest defenders of their lovers
✵ - Eris aspecting Mercury can tend to cuss people off and to end them with words because they can really be aggresive verbally, like starting a fight with them is like being in the middle of a hurricane
✵ - Eris aspecting Moon can have chaotic feelings and feel multiple things at once but these aspects are also very strong for defending what they love and what they want to achieve
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✵ - Lilith aspecting Moon can be intense, especially if you have mommy issues but is more than that, this is powerful, you are able to control your feelings very well and to manage to not show your emotions
✵ - Lilith - Mars aspects are soo good at attracting the opposite sex to them, especially if you are attracted to men with this aspect you drain them into you
✵ - Have you ever been to a party with someone who has a Sagittarius or Leo Moon? Or someone who has Moon in the 5th or 9th house? These people really know how to party like, partying and their socializing time is everything "If you see us on the floor you'll be watching all night"
✵ - Saturn/Venus/Sun or Moon in the 7th house = GURL you know you're getting the hottest thing called spouse ever on this earth right??
✵ - Sun aspecting Chiron be like "People will never feel how I feel and will never understand what I feel and why I feel some things,I guess i have to not tell my pain to anyone" - They are def some of the strongest people born
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✵ - Ascendant sextile/trine/conjunct Pluto are too iconic for this world to have, so many celebrities have these in their birthcharts
✵ - Nobody but nobody ever can tell someone with Libra or Leo Rising that they look bad because they will embarras themselves, like you tell the beauty icon that they look bad? BFR
✵ - Aquarius Placements wil always be the definition of uniqueness in your birth chart and shows what makes you unique, they aret the salvation
✵ - Aquarius Risings are rare at personality. Notice how is always something unique with the celebrities who have this specific rising sign? They are natural rarities and people don't appreciate them enough
✵ - Capricorn Risings have the same effect because of their authenticity. They keep it authentic and creative, do not be afraid to show your true colors to people
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✵ - Gemini/Virgo Risings look more young than they actually are, this thing can make them more attractive because it will be hard to guess your age. Also don't tell your age let people guess your age for more mystery
✵ - Sagittarius Risingsss and their appealllll like gurlll you are magnetic, your ruler Jupiter grants you luck for your whole life since your birth and until your death you have luck written in stars, I love ittt
✵ - I should give a raise to Moon - Pluto aspects for being so misterious and hypnotizing, they are like a shadow who follows around but you never know where it is, also their eyes are extremely beautiful
✵ - Sagittarius Placements are so Iconic for being this honest,I mean you don't want honesty in your life and you choose to be Delulu? Good, always be friends with Sagittarius Placements cause they will spill the tea
✵ - Capricorn Sun/Rising/Moon and the dark femme fatale aesthetic fits so good together like gurlll, black is definitely theirs, they dominate when they wear black (Even Saturn approves)
✵ - Get yourself a bestie with Leo placements so you can talk hours about fashion and gloss, trust the process they have so many good points
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✵ - Asteroid Sirene (1009) in Gemini/Virgo will use their enchanting voice to charm the people they want to attract, the native has such an enchanting voice
✵ - Asteroid Sirene (1009) in Scorpio/Cancer/Pisces and GURLLL you really give off Sirene vibes, your eyes, your appearance are enchanting (I imagine them being Vanessa from the little mermaid)
✵ - Juno sextile/trine/conjunct Midheaven and the way they will show off to everyone what a lovely relationship they have will be EPIC, these people have the relationship everyone dreams
✵ - Juno at 5°, 17°, 29° degrees.. Who's gonna tell her?? HOW iconic your spouse can be?? LIKE they will be there for everything at the right moment
✵ - Lilith aspecting Mars (all aspects) often can find the men to be more attracted to them, like a magnet, even the men you don't want to have around you
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✵ - Ascendant aspecting Venus (all aspects) are extremely pretty, they are all blessed by Venus in different ways to express their beautiful nature and their gifts
✵ - Hurting someone with heavy Capricorn/Aquarius placements = Karma coming for you when you don't expect it, is like something that never stops until you acknowledge you hurt these people
✵ - Venus at 10°,11°, 22°, 23° degrees can get vey good looking spouses, also mature aswell and veryyy serious about their relationships, they are the type of people " We don't break up we fix it together" (Saturn rules these degrees)
✵ - For those interested in men...Jupiter at 5°, 17°, or 29° degrees can have the same effect, meeting that partner who is extremely hot and smart in the same time, (they will have a good personality)
✵ - Scorpio Sun/Moon/Rising and their mystery is something else, they are remarcabile at hiding secrets and they are extremely loyal to their lovers
✵- Lilith or True Lilith in Leo/Libra/Scorpio/Aquarius are so mesmerizing , when you encounter them you be have this energy of wanting to talk with them and make a contact
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✵ - Venus aspecting Mercury, CAN I tell how iconic your voice is??? Everyone is always so impressed by your voice and the way you talk is so gracious
✵ - Venus in Capricorn/Taurus/Virgo and LET IT flow with money, Venus is these signs feels like a "Material Girl" they are having money, style, everything
✵ - Lilith or True Lilith in the 7th house and their mesmerizing power to attract people is INSANE, I tell you is insane how many people can be interested in them
✵ - Air Moons and their style in music is everything, music is bounded to them fr. Highly artisans natives, they can even be good compositors at making and writing music
✵ - Juno at Pisces Degrees (12°, 24°) will most likely meet their true soulmate in this life and create a bound with them. Is written in your destiny and these degrees confirm it
✵ - North Node in 7th house in your Chiron Persona Chart indicates your destiny in order to heal is to have an healthy relationship and an healthy partner
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⊰᯽⊱┈──╌❊╌──┈⊰᯽⊱
✨ ICONIC placements post for y'all 😍🤞🏼 enjoyyyy ✨
💥💋 Everyone is iconic in different ways but with same knowledge 💋💥
💥💋 I hope you all have a good day full of good moments with the people you love 💋💥
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
With love, Harmoonix 💋
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dreaming-medium · 7 months
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Stray Kids Kinktober Day 6
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Stray Kids Kinktober Masterlist
Frottage - Bang Chan
Word Count: 8.8k
Summary: Being an award winning actress isn’t as easy as some might think. Award shows themself are one of the more difficult events to tackle. But luckily, during this ceremony, you get to meet some of your favorite idols, and they get to meet their favorite actress.
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“And after the awards ceremony there’s an after party at The Plaza.” Your agent’s voice is strictly business in the back of the limousine. 
You’re playing with the fabric of your gown while absentmindedly listening to her. 
“Do I have to be on set tomorrow?”
“Yes, your call is at 9:00 AM. Transportation will be at your hotel at 7:30.”
You groan and look up at the ceiling. “Why do they always put these award shows on weekdays?”
“Your weekends aren’t exactly free anymore, either.” 
Yes, you’re aware. 
The life of an actress was not easy. Especially an award winning one. Right now, you are the hot, new, up-and-coming actress that everyone has their eye on. The actress that every director wants in their movie, their TV show, their commercials– everything.
Currently, you’re in the middle of filming a TV show that has a high fantasy aesthetic to it. You’re the main role in the show, the main badass warrior that everyone roots for. The kind of character that has a million and thirty Tik Tok edits of her.
It’s one of those shows where your character is constantly going through the wringer. The amount of bruises that you have to sport on camera increases each day; real and fake. 
Your nerves begin to creep up on you the closer you get to the award venue. 
Red carpets were one of the hardest parts of the job. Memorizing lines? Easy. Learning blocking and fight choreo? You do that every day. 
Talk to strangers and pose for pictures? No, thank you. 
Who were you wearing again?
“This dress is Gucci, right?”
“No, it’s Christian Siriano. I’m glad you asked. Your jewelry is Gucci and your shoes are Prada.”
You stare at your agent blankly, she hasn’t looked up from her tablet once. You were not made for this part of the job.
“Jesus…” you sigh and lean back into the cushioned seat. 
“While we’re at it, do you even know what award you’re up for?”
“Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series, right?”
“And?”
“And?” you repeat incredulously. “I thought I was only up for one!”
Finally, your agent looks up with a smirk. “Trick question, you passed. Proud of you.”
You can’t help but laugh and look out the window. “You know I’m nervous as all hell, don’t test me.”
“Don’t be nervous. I’m sure you have this in the bag.”
“That’s exactly what I’m nervous about. I have to get up, walk up those stairs in these Gucci—“
“Prada.”
“Prada shoes. And then make an acceptance speech in front of everyone. Millions of people. No pressure.”
She laughs and looks down at her tablet again. “You’re very charming and everyone loves you, you can talk the paint off a wall, Y/N, just be yourself.”
Grumbling, you cross your arms over your chest. But you can’t sit still in that position for too long at all. You’re too fidgety. 
In front of you, there’s a chilled bottle of champagne. You pour it into one of the flutes and sip it entirely too fast for the quality of the drink. ‘Sip’ is putting it gently, you down it. 
A second glass is poured, but you choose to hold that one in your hand tightly. Absent-mindedly, you swirl the champagne around, watching the bubbles form and pop up at the top. 
A few moments of silence pass, you begin to mutter to yourself to ease the stress. “Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, Prada shoes. Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, Prada shoes..”
The crowd starts getting louder the closer you get to the event. Cameras are already flashing outside your limousine. 
“I haven’t even told you who’s going to be there.”
Your agent sounds extremely smug all of a sudden. When you look over at her, there’s a cocky smirk on her face. 
“Who?” With that look, you’re not even sure that you want to know the answer. 
“Maybe put the drink down before I tell you. Wouldn’t want you to spill it on your…”
“Christian Siriano.”
“Christian Siriano dress.”
After downing the contents once more, you put the glass down. 
“Okay, who?”
Her smile grows even wider. “You know Stray Kids, right?”
Your face pales, even under all that makeup all the color drains from your skin. 
“They’re going to be there?”
She knows, she knows you’ve been a fan for a while. You were a Stay before fame came your way. 
Your agent smiles and nods, the light from her tablet illuminating her face. 
“Don’t play with me,” your voice is strained. “That’s mean.”
You’ve been keeping your admiration of them on the down low for so long. Now that you’re in the public eye, you have to be very low key about things. 
It was killing you. 
“They did a soundtrack song for a show, it’s up for an award.”
You were nervous before. Now you’re downright hysterical. 
“They’re going to be there? All eight of them?”
“To my knowledge, yes.”
The limousine comes to a gradual stop. The screams outside are deafening, even through the car doors. 
“Will I see them?” You ask, gathering your skirt up to try and assist with a graceful exit out of the limo. 
“Probably!” There’s a little hint to her voice that you can’t quite put your finger on. What is she doing? What does she know? 
The driver comes around the limousine and you take a deep breath, activating your celebrity face. 
It’s never hard for you to muster a genuine smile. You’re humble about your life, you know how lucky you are. Thinking about how far you’ve come is all the motivation you need to let the corners of your lips perk up.
“Ready?” Your agent asks.
“Yes, ma’am!”
The door opens and the roar of the crowd goes insane. You’re practically blinded by the flashes of the cameras. 
You do your very best to keep a level head and follow the instructions of the security team around you. 
In the meantime, as you walk into the venue, you turn and smile at the fans behind the barricades. 
Sending them hand hearts, waving enthusiastically back at them. You look up at your head security guard.
“Can I please go sign a few autographs?”
He looks down at you, obviously annoyed. But annoyed in the fatherly way. Just by the look on his face, you knew he was going to say yes. 
You quickly pick up your skirt and walk over to the barricade. The screams get louder and louder the closer you get. 
“Hi! Hi!” You greet all the fans as they scream for you. So many different objects are thrust over the fence for you to sign. 
You grab a marker and begin leaving your signature over everything in sight: posters, shirts, books. 
Several selfies are taken with you. Every single fan is so sweet and kind that you can’t help but spend extra time with them. 
They reach out and grab your hands, you hold them back and have conversations with them. 
You always do this. It’s something you’re very well known for. 
“Miss Y/N.” your security guard says gruffly behind you. 
“Okay, okay. I gotta go, guys. It was so nice meeting you, and it was nice seeing you again!” You point to a fan that you recognized from a convention you attended a few months ago. 
After blowing a few more kisses, you leave the barricade and head towards the red carpet. 
If it was up to you, you would’ve stood there and talked with your fans all day and never gone into the awards ceremony. They’re the reason you’re here, after all. 
Walking along the carpet, you plaster a smile on your face and wave to all the photographers. You stand still right in the middle of the space and strike several different practiced poses. 
You make sure to look in all different directions and show off the dress hugging your body beautifully. 
It’s a dark yellow gown with huge puffed sleeves that sit off your shoulders. The center of the gown dips down to show off your cleavage. The rest of the skirt poofs out in a princess style. 
It’s absolutely gorgeous. Crafted to show off your body in the best way.
All the photographers call out your name, all of them trying to get your attention. 
You wave to several that you recognize and say hello to others. 
Your short minutes on the red carpet run out and you quickly make your way across to the other side to link arms with your agent. 
She pats your arm, “Great job! Now for the hard part.”
On the other side of the red carpet there are several different magazines, websites, and other fashion sources lined up with interviewers stationed in front of cameras. 
“I studied for this, remember?” you tease her and hug her arm closer before letting go. 
The first interview you do is with Vogue, they had grabbed your attention so fast you almost got whiplash. 
How’s the show? Who are you wearing? Are you nervous about tonight?
These are all questions you prepared for.  
Next interview was with Vanity Fair. You had recognized the interviewer, so you approached her first. 
“Y/N!” Her face lights up when she sees you.
“Hi!” you answer just as cheerfully, wrapping her in a big hug and then holding her out at arms length. “How have you been?”
“So good, you?”
“Can’t complain– busy. I’m so glad to see you!”
“Me too! Do you have time for an interview?” She asks hopefully. 
“I always have time for you.”
She says thank you and her camera man gets into place. A second microphone is handed to you. Before you can blink, she’s in interview mode. 
You smile and listen to her introduction.
“I am here with, Y/N L/N, star of the Emmy award winning show, Kings and Pirates. How are you doing tonight, Y/N?”
You lift the microphone up to your mouth and speak into it happily. “I’m doing great, thank you! Always a pleasure to be talking with you on the red carpet.”
“You flatter me, Y/N! Now tell us the obvious question here: Who are you wearing?”
“I am wearing an original Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, and Prada shoes.”
“The entire outfit is beautiful! An amazing dress to hopefully show off when you win Best Actress tonight…?”
You laugh humbly. “I don’t know, there are so many amazing actresses nominated tonight. A girl can hope, but when I see the other names around mine, I can’t help but be anxious.”
The interviewer opens her mouth to ask another question, but the crowd absolutely erupts in cheers. Louder than when you got out of your limo, louder than some concerts you’ve attended. 
“Oh my god, I think someone important just showed up.” You joked into the microphone. 
Both you and the interviewer are looking across the carpet, craning your necks to see if you can get a glimpse of whoever just stepped out. 
“Minho! Hyunjin! Felix!” Crowd members scream out several names and your heart rate skyrockets. 
“Oh my god, it’s Stray Kids.” You accidentally say into the mic. 
“Oh wow! Are you a Stay?” She asks you. Your head whips around and a dark blush covers your cheeks. 
Laughing nervously, you look down at the ground, suddenly sheepish. “Ah… well, yeah. I’ve been a fan of theirs for years now.”
“Did you know they were going to be here tonight?”
“I was told it was a possibility, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up.”
Joke after joke makes the interviewer and her cameraman laugh. 
The interview continues without a hitch. But the entire time all you want to do is turn around  and see if you can catch a glimpse of Stray Kids. 
Yes, you’re famous. But you’re just a Stay at heart. 
You say your goodbyes with the interviewer and turn to move onto the next one. 
A gasp catches in your throat as soon as you step away. 
All eight of them are right there, doing their own interview with Buzzfeed. They’re smiling and laughing about something. 
You’re just able to stare. They’re right there. You’ve never been in the same space as them. 
Act professional, Y/N! Stop acting like a fangirl, you’re literally on the clock right now!
Their laughter is contagious and you find yourself smiling as you turn away and walk to another interviewer trying to flag you down. 
“… excited to maybe meet tonight? You guys are usually at music award shows, so this is definitely new for you! There’s some new faces that you probably have never seen before.”
“We actually were just talking about this on the ride over,” Chan says to the interviewer, ever the front man. “We’re all huge fans of Kings and Pirates, we watch it together every week when new episodes come out. We joked that it would be an amazing opportunity to say hi to Y/N L/N.”
It’s like the red carpet is pulled right out from underneath your feet. 
“But that would be like trying to get a private conversation with royalty, you know?”
You? They want to meet you? They watch your show? Every week? Together? 
“I think I just saw her around…” the interviewer trails off, by her tone you can tell she’s looking around for you. 
Act casual, Y/N. Pretend like you weren’t listening to every word of their interview closely. Act normal for once in your life.
“Ah, no way.” Chan’s thick accent reaches your ears. He sounds so shy by his tone. Several other members murmur and tease one another. 
“Oh, there she is! Y/N!” The interviewer grabs your attention— she technically already had it. 
The members begin to get louder when you turn your head to look at the entire group of them staring at you. 
When your eyes meet all of theirs, each of them freeze like a deer in headlights. Do they even know who they are?
You can’t tell if you’ve gone sheet white or bright red. Your heart is beating so fast it might explode. 
The interviewer waves you over, you look over at the other one you were walking to and hold up a finger to say ‘one moment’ before walking over to the large group of them. 
“Hi, hi!” You cheer casually when you come up next to them. 
All right members look absolutely starstruck. Jeongin’s eyes look like they might bug out of his head. 
They all bow politely when you join the group. 
Chan’s bow is a second later than everyone else’s. He’s too busy staring in absolute disbelief. 
“Y/N! It’s so nice to see you!” the interviewer says. You think you recognize her from another event. 
“You as well,” you respond with a beautiful smile.
“Let’s get you a mic— oh, we have no more— maybe someone— can share?”
Chan is the member closest to you, he immediately angles the mic your way. He does it so fast and eagerly it almost hits right into you. 
You giggle and thank him, “Thank you! It’s good to see you too,” you repeat and step a bit closer to him to make sharing easier. 
He smells so good. You can feel his body heat radiating onto your bare shoulders. Thankfully, the outdoor chill isn't affecting you much due to your adrenaline being so high. 
“Y/N, before I ask anything else, I do need to ask who you’re wearing.”
“Oh, a Christian Siriano original with accessories by Gucci and shoes by Prada.”
“Absolutely stunning,” the interviewer compliments. 
A light giggle comes from your chest and you go to thank her. It’s under his breath but you hear Chan say something along the lines of ‘that’s an understatement.’
“I did call you over here for a specific reason, besides the fact that we would love to interview a nominee for Best Actress. It seems you have eight fans all eager to meet you!”
You turn and look over at the members with wide eyes. “Oh my god!” You say out loud and your hand flies to your chest. “I am literally honored!”
“You know Stray Kids?” The interviewer asks. 
Well, if they already said they were fans… 
You lean down into the mic and laugh, “I have been a Stay for so long, are you kidding?”
Every single one of them don shocked expressions. Chan goes stiff as a board. 
You look at each of them with one of the most gorgeous smiles across your face. “When I was called over here with you guys I thought I was going to pass out. I had your discography playing in the room while my stylists got me ready.”
All eight of them move around like little kids meeting their idols for the first time. They each stare at you with literal stars in their eyes. 
“The first album that caught my attention was In Life, actually. Haven is my favorite song.”
You rain compliment after compliment down on them.
“It’s truly an honor to meet you, we’re all such huge fans.” Felix is the one that breaks the silence into the mic. The rest of them all nod eagerly. 
“Since we’re all fans of Kings and Pirates,” the interviewer brings your attention back. “Do you think you could give us a small spoiler for the new season coming out?”
“Ah,” you laugh and look around a bit, sucking your teeth in thought. “I reaaally shouldn’t, but…” You look to the side to make eye contact with all the members but Chan’s piercing gaze is the one that stole your breath away. 
His stylist had done his hair in such a natural, curly way. Every single strand is sitting perfectly on his head. The makeup on his face highlights his features angelically. 
Especially that beautiful nose of his. 
Each of them wore black tie suits with a bit of personal flair on them. Chan’s entire suit, including the undershirt and tie, was black. 
It takes a moment for your brain to reboot, not that anyone noticed. To them, it just looked like you were thinking of a small spoiler to give away. 
“I think that fans can look forward to seeing an old face that we previously had to say goodbye to.”
Jeongin eagerly grabs Han’s arm and says something in his ear. The two of them start whispering about what the spoiler could possibly mean. 
The rest of them all move around anxiously. Except Chan. He continues to stare at you with his lips parted slightly. 
You hold his eye contact for one more moment before looking back at the interviewer with a sinfully sweet smile. 
“Wow!” She says over-dramatically on purpose, “I think us fans have a lot to look forward to. Best of luck to all of you with your nominations tonight!”
“Thank you so much!” You chirp into the mic and stand there with a smile while she does her required sign off to go back to the main camera back in LA. 
During those few moments, you feel Chan shift his weight so that his entire arm brushes against yours. Goosebumps immediately fly up your shoulder and through your neck. 
It takes every muscle in your body not to react to it.
He’s still holding the mic between the two of you just in case you need to speak again. You want to turn your head and look at him so badly. 
You want to talk to him in the worst way; ask him questions about the music, even just how his day is, anything. 
The cameras cut and you instantly let out a sigh of relief, next to you, you see the eight of them deflate a bit too. 
The interviewer says her thanks and the crew takes the mics back from everyone. 
“It really was a pleasure meeting you guys,” you say with your hand on your heart again. “Words cannot describe how honored I am to be talking to you all.”
“Are you kidding?” Chan jokes. “We all feel the same way. I don’t think we even thought we would be able to stand near you tonight.”
You laugh and see your agent signaling you out of the corner of your eye. 
“Bah! I’m just a girl, really! Best of luck to you guys tonight, I’ll be cheering extra loud from the crowd when you win!”
“The same goes for us,” Chan smiles. He sticks his hand out and you immediately grab it. 
Electricity shoots up your arm and you have to bite your cheek to keep yourself from screaming. 
Your hands shake and you say your goodbyes to each of the members before walking away to your next interview. 
As soon as they think you’re out of earshot, they all begin talking rapidly to one another about you. 
“Can you believe it?”
“She’s a Stay!”
“Oh my god, I think I blacked out, did that really happen?”
“You lucky bastard, you got to shake her hand and share your mic with her.”
“Stop acting like a middle schooler.”
Their voices fade into the background the further you get from them. You just can’t help but smile and look down at the floor sheepishly. 
---------------------------------------
“I’ll find you after the awards show, okay, hon?” Your agent catches your attention as you walk into the auditorium. 
She grabs both of your forearms lightly and kisses your cheek. “Best of luck to you, don’t make yourself look stupid on stage.”
That last part is whispered into your ear and it makes you laugh. “I won’t! I won’t!”
She says her goodbyes once more and you look up at the usher waiting for you. 
This award show has its nominees all sitting around large dinner tables. There’s about ten people per table. 
For your show, you were the only one nominated for an award tonight, so not even your director or crew was here to sit with you. 
The usher held out his arm for you to take and you did so with a gracious smile. There’s a reason you’re known for charming everyone you meet. 
He leads you through the vast room. Several fellow actors call your name and greet you, and you respond to each one happily. 
“Here we are, Miss Y/N.”
No way. Absolutely no way. 
Seated around the entire table are the eight members you saw mere minutes ago, their manager taking the ninth seat. 
Sure enough, your name is printed on a sign draped over the back of the chair. 
Minho looks up at you first and waves sheepishly. You immediately wave back.
If Lee Minho waves, you wave back. 
“Hi again!” You greet them all before turning up and gently laying a hand on the usher’s bicep to thank him. He bows his head once and walks off. 
Chan, who was seated next to your empty chair, practically springs out of his seat and stands next to you. 
“I can’t believe this,” you tell him with a wide smile. He mirrors it and holds his hand out to the chair. 
You laugh while he grabs the back of it and pulls it out from the table. 
It takes a little bit of special maneuvering, but you manage to fold your poofy skirt down in order to sit down. Chan pushes your chair back in and takes his seat next to you. 
He now sits on your left, Seungmin on your right. 
“I guess I would’ve met you guys tonight regardless, then!” 
“It seems that way,” Chan answers. He reaches up and rubs the side of his neck with his hand. 
Now, from years of being a fan, you know that’s a nervous tick of his. And with your friendly nature, all you want to do is soothe him. 
“It’s like I’m getting a deluxe, VIP fan meeting. When Stay watches the award ceremony they’re all going to put a bounty on my head.” 
They all laugh and you turn to look at Seungmin, “Can I have an autograph before I die? I didn’t bring any of my albums with me, though.”
He laughs at your joke and your heart smiles with his beautiful grin. 
“I knew I should’ve brought a photocard with me.”
Behind you, Chan shifts around. “You bought our albums?”
You turn back to him, “Of course I did. I wanted to support you guys. Best way to do that is streaming your music and buying the albums, right?”
“Yeah,” he answers nervously, his bottom lip pulling between his teeth. “Yeah, you’re right. Just didn’t think I’d ever meet a celebrity I admired and find out they’re a Stay.”
You giggle and lean forward on the table. “I hope that’s not weird. I think I would’ve exploded if I didn’t tell you guys how big of a fan I was.”
“Not weird at all, just unexpected.”
“I guess I feel the same way, especially after hearing that you guys watch the show.”
“We love the show!” Han tells you from across the table. “Sometimes Minho will cut dance rehearsals early for us to go back and watch it.”
“Seriously?” you ask. “Wow, that really means a lot, you have no idea.”
“It’s easy to be a fan of yours,” Chan grabs your attention. “You’re one of the kindest people we’ve met in a while.”
Oh, you are practically kicking your feet around. 
“Fame is a whole other universe to tackle. I wanted to make sure I treat my fans and everyone around me the way I wanted to be treated before all this happened to me. It’s important not to lose yourself. But I know you guys all know that already. You’re masters at it.”
“Hyunjin still lets it get to his head.” Felix jokes. 
“What!”
The pre-show continues like this as the rest of the celebrities file in. Many stop by your chair and say hello to you.
With each one, you get up out of your seat, hug and kiss them hello, then sit back down only to be interrupted again. 
“You certainly are popular,” Chan comments after you say goodbye to a fellow actor. “That last guy crossed the room to come say hi to you.”
With a giggle, you joke, “Is someone jealous?”
He stiffens for a moment, his back going straight and he clenches his fists on the tabletop for a moment. “No.”
His answer is not firm at all. 
Before you’re able to analyze it, producers come out among the audience to tell everyone the cameras are about to begin rolling. 
“When is your award in the lineup?” You whisper over to Seungmin. 
“Right before yours, actually.”
“Maybe I’ll see you all backstage then.”
You both smile at each other and shift back in your chairs. 
Several cameramen come out into the audience with their large sets of equipment. One of them is very obviously hovering by you. 
You know he’ll signal you if you’re being shown. The teleprompters strategically placed along the venue also show what is being broadcasted. 
Opening music begins playing and the lights dim among the audience. The centerpieces on the tables give off an evening glow. 
A waiter comes over and places your drink on the table. You actually had forgotten you requested one before sitting down. 
You thank him and he takes his leave. 
“What’s that?” Chan whispers in your ear. 
“Espresso martini,” you answer. “Wanna try?”
Chan looks over at his manager, who is busy watching the host make his opening speech. He nods quickly and leans down, taking a long sip off the top. 
A tiny ‘mmm’ comes from the back of his throat and he looks at you while licking his lips a bit. 
“Oh that’s delicious.”
“And dangerous.”
You lift the glass and take a long sip from it and place it back down on the table. 
“I got my first major role fresh out of college. I’m still learning how to not rely on alcohol to have fun.”
Chan just laughs and both of you direct your attention to the host on stage. 
“-and if all else fails, we have our lovely knight in shining armor to protect us, tonight.”
The camera man turns and has the camera on your face. You smile brightly and blow a kiss into the camera. The entire audience lets out several positive reactions. 
When the camera cuts away, you let out a sigh of relief. “I knew they were gonna do that.”
You take another large swig of your drink. It’s almost empty already. Curse these fancy people and their tiny portions. 
Chan leans over and suddenly his hot breath is on your skin. Goosebumps rip down your body and you can’t suppress a shiver. 
“Careful,” he whispers lowly. “I don’t think you want to be stumbling onto the stage.”
“I think you underestimate my alcohol tolerance, Mr. Bang.”
You both make eye contact.
The audience applauds as the host leaves the stage and the first announcer comes on. Both of you clap and Chan leans away from you. Out of the corner of your eye, you see his tongue dart out to wet his bottom lip before he pulls it between his teeth.
His cologne lingers around your senses even after he’s gone. 
Dammit, he’s right. But, my god, you need another stiff drink.
---------------------------------------
“And here are the nominees…” The announcer says into the mic. The entire table is holding their breath. 
This was it, this was Stray Kids’ award. Your jaw clenches with anticipation as the names are read off one by one. Individually, you crack each of your knuckles anxiously.
All eight of the members are staring up at the screen, each of them have their own nervous ticks. 
You reach under the table to try and comfort Chan a bit, your hand landing on his knee. He jumps in place at the table at the contact.
Without looking at each other, he places his hand on top of your and squeezes a bit.
“It’s going to suck when I have to sit here by myself after you guys win.” you whisper to him.
“If we win.”
“You’re going to win.” You squeeze his knee again.
“And the winner is…” 
You suck in a breath, all of them stiffen up. Cameras are pointed at each of the nominees tables. 
“Stray Kids!”
Immediately, you spring out of your seat with a gleeful cheer. Clapping your hands together and smiling at each of them. 
Without a second thought, Chan wraps you into a grand hug, pure joy written across his face. Your face morphs into a shocked one, but you hug him back happily.
He’s so warm. His hug is so tight.
After a few heartbeats, he tears himself off of you with an unreadable expression. All eight of them walk up to the stage and grab the award from the presenter.
Sitting back down, you take a second to catch your breath. 
So badly, you want to focus on their acceptance speech, but all you can think about was the way Chan held you. It went straight to your heart, and thanks to the alcohol in your veins, it traveled a bit south as well. 
Nervously, your hand comes up and rubs at your chest by your collarbones, a small nervous tick of yours.
The table feels so empty without the eight of them there. Their manager is the only one left sitting there with you. He’s watching their speech intently.
Both of you stand and clap once more as they walk off the stage. All of them pushing each other gleefully and playing slap ass. It makes you giggle.
All of the lights around the room shift again and another announcer comes into the stage. The same camera man as before comes around the side of the table to stand closer to you.
The announcer goes through their speech about how important actresses are, how each of you stood out, how it was an honorable nomination. Your heart is in your throat, you can feel each thud against your ribcage so closely. 
No one was next to you to hold your knee. 
“And the nominees are…”
Various clips of the other nominees in their element flash behind their names.
Your name is third. Several different dramatic scenes play out within the five second window. They chose some of your best scenes for that little animation. The next few nominees flash after that.
“And the winner is…”
You suck in your breath.
“Y/N L/N! King and Pirates!”
The entire audience erupts in cheers. Practically everyone stands up on their feet.
You bury your face in your hands in disbelief. 
“Oh my god!” you practically yell as you stand up. 
An actor from the next table places his hand on your back to help you out of your chair. You smile gratefully at him and make your way up to the stage. 
During the entire walk, several different people offer you their congratulations, you thank each of them, shaking their hands. 
Climbing your way onto the stage, you make your way over to the announcer, kissing their cheeks as a thank you and turning to speak into the mic.
“Oh wow,” you laugh into the mic, looking down at the award and then back up at the audience. “I know everyone says this, but I really did not expect this! I mean, have you seen any of the other shows?”
A gentle laugh comes from the crowd. 
The rest of your acceptance speech is short, sweet, and to the point. The timer on one of the teleprompters definitely motivated you to speak quickly. 
As you walk away with your award, music plays behind you. A stage manager comes up to you and ushers you through the wings.
Several more congratulations come your way, you respond to each of them humbly.
You turn a corner and are met with a cheer even louder than the one from the auditorium full of people. 
All eight members of Stray Kids are clapping for you, jumping up and down in excitement. Your enthusiasm immediately matches theirs as you come up to them.
“I can’t believe it!” you say loudly, holding the award out to look at. “I think I’m dreaming!”
You turn and look up at Hyunjin, “Pinch me, I have to be asleep!”
He laughs at you and lightly grabs your arm. You yip dramatically and look back down at the trophy. “Nope, definitely awake!”
“If you guys would please find your seats, we need to clear this hallway.” a stagehand ushers your group away. He turns and looks down at you with a soft smile, “They wouldn’t leave until you came back.”
“Aww,” you coo to all of them. Your arm wraps around Jeongin’s, who happens to be the closest at the moment. “You guys are too sweet!” 
Your head rests on his arm and you hug it close as a thank you. He pats your hand and bends his arm to escort you back to your table.
A pair of deep brown eyes burn into the side of your head the more you grab onto Jeongin. Not that you noticed. 
Walking through the hallways, you see one back hall that has signs for the bathroom.
“Actually, I’m going to run to the ladies’ room before going back to the table. I’ll meet you guys back there. Do you mind taking this back to the table for me?”
You drop Jeongin’s arm and hold the trophy out to him. The maknae is hesitant, but takes your award anyway. You laugh at him and rub his arm before you head back to the bathroom.
“Am I allowed to be holding this?” he asks as you walk away.
The venue was a grand, old hotel, you follow so many twists and turns to get to the bathroom. Was there even one back here?
Did you take a wrong turn? There aren’t even workers back here. 
You definitely aren’t supposed to be back here. Turning back and finding another bathroom is probably the best option at this point. 
A gentle grasp on your wrist makes your heart jump and a gasp tear from your throat. Frightened, you turn around and raise your hand to hit whoever snuck up on you. 
“Y/N! It’s just me!” Chan says quickly, cowering behind his hand just in case you still swing. 
“Ugh, Chan! You scared the shit out of me!”
“Sorry, I called your name a few times, I guess you didn’t hear me.” You shake your head, he sucks his teeth. “That explains it. Staff told me there’s no bathroom down here, I wanted to grab you before you got too lost.”
Chan chuckles nervously, you laugh too. “That explains it. I guess those signs must’ve been extras that they printed for the venue. Who knows?”
It’s now that you notice he’s still holding your wrist tightly in his hand. His hand is so warm, so soft. 
He nervously licks his lips and his eyes look all around the hall, anywhere but at you. His throat bobs with a gulp. 
“I don’t ah— I don’t believe I gave you a proper congratulations. So, congratulations on the award. You deserve it.”
“Oh!” You giggle. “Thank you! And a hearty congratulations to you as well, I can’t think of anyone who’s worked harder than you guys.”
Taking another step closer to him, you turn your wrist around and take a hold of his hand.
“I also can’t think of any other celebrities I would want to celebrate with.” The corners of your lips pull into a grin, Chan’s twitch as well. “You guys are so sweet, cheering for me. Made the win that much better.”
Slowly, his ears begin to turn red and his jaw clenches a few times. His chocolate brown eyes flit all over your face and around the hall. His nerves on clear display. 
“Yeah, well, you deserve it, so.” Chan clears his throat and adjusts the tie around his neck. “I can’t take credit for it, it was Changbin’s idea to wait for you and all.” 
You reach up on your toes and press a long, soft kiss to his cheek. With his lips right by your ear, you’re able to hear him gasp under his breath and then stop breathing. 
Underneath your lips, you feel how much heat is radiating off his smooth skin. It’s like you kissed a frying pan. 
“Thank you, Channie,” you whisper against his skin. 
The hand around yours twitches and tightens. 
You press another kiss to his cheek before going to back away. 
Quicker than you can blink, Chan’s free hand comes around your body and holds you against him. His hand curls around you to press into the small of your back. 
Your head tucks under his chin, ear against the dip of his throat. His heart is beating just as fast as yours. 
“Not yet,” he whispers so quietly you almost didn’t hear it. “Please, not yet.”
Your heart thuds in your chest at his words. How could you not? The Bang Chan is asking you to stay closer to him for just a little while longer. The same man you’ve admired from a distance for years. 
The man who created such a deep parasocial relationship with you that it took a lot of self reflection to bring yourself out of it. And now, here you were, in his arms in real life, tucked away in the hallway of this hotel. 
Smelling his expensive cologne and aftershave, listening to his shallow breathing, the entire world seems to stop. If your past self could see this, she’d probably pass out. 
Hell, you might pass out now. 
You squeeze his hand once and he responds with a grip of his own. 
Slowly, you pull your head back to gaze up at him. He stares down at you with the most thoughtful expression. 
Eyes are windows to the soul; and right now, his soul is so flustered and fulfilled at the same time. 
“I can’t believe tonight is real,” you murmur. 
Several times, you catch Chan’s eyes flicking down to your lips. Each stolen glance adds another butterfly to your stomach. 
His hand on your back pulls you even closer. 
“You keep talking as if you’re not one of the biggest names in the world right now.” he teases and you chuckle softly. “If anyone should be pinching themself, it’s me.”
His breath is cool and minty. Yours is tinged with espresso. 
Your tongue comes out and licks your bottom lip before you pull it between your teeth. Chan watches, trying not to make it obvious. 
“Can I try something?” Your question is deathly quiet. If it wasn’t for the silence of the hallway, there’s no way he would have heard it otherwise. 
“Yes,” he replies immediately. It comes out as a huff; quick, short, and desperate. 
“Close your eyes, Chan.”
He listens right away, his eyes snapping shut. 
You hesitate for a split second, just taking in his ethereal beauty. Every curve of his gorgeous, blemish free face. It’s not fair.
Both of his hands twitch, his jaw clenches. 
You lean up slowly and press a featherlight kiss on his plush lips. 
His shoulders seem to sag inwards, a large, relieved exhale leaves his nose. 
Fireworks explode behind your eyes, tingles shoot down into your fingertips. 
You pull back after a second, his eyes open a bit and Chan stares down at you, his lips parting for a moment. 
He stares intently into your eyes, as if trying to read you or see something within them. 
Without breaking eye contact, he leans down and kisses you again. You melt into the kiss with half lidded eyes, they unfocus as you fall further into his kiss. 
Chan pulls back for a moment to turn his head and capture your lips once more, his bottom lip slotting between yours. 
Both of your eyes shut. 
Your hands move and you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling his head closer to yours as he kisses you like his life depends on it. 
Chan holds your waist with both hands, the heat from his hold going right through your dress. 
Each kiss is hot and heavier than the last. His grips at your dress grow needier and needier by the second, he can’t hold you close enough to his body.
Within moments, you’re both opening and closing your mouths, with open mouthed, wet, sloppy kisses. His eyebrows pull together.
Erotic pants fill the empty hallway.
You ever so gently bite down on his bottom lip and pull your head back. 
Chan sighs and his half lidded, hazy eyes look down into yours as his lip snaps back after you release it. 
He takes two long steps and walks you backwards until your back hits the wall. 
“Tell me to stop,” he murmurs against your lips before capturing them in another heated kiss. “You’ll have to tell me. I can’t do it myself. Not when I’ve wanted you for so long.”
Your fingers thread up through his hair on the back of his head and you pull him closer against you. 
Tangled tongues and gentle grunts mix together. 
“What if I don’t want you to stop?” you ask lowly in between kisses. 
Chan groans and presses his entire body into yours. 
You felt like you’re on fire with the way you’re so feverishly pulling him closer. 
One his hands moves up and down your waist. The puffiness of your skirt getting in the way of his hips grinding directly into yours. 
“So beautiful,” he mutters between kisses. “So gorgeous.” Kiss. “Wanted you for so long.”
It’s your turn to moan at his praise, you suck on his tongue and his eyes roll back in his skull. 
When you pull away from each other panting, you look around in the hallway. There’s a door right next to you both, where it leads, you’re not sure. 
Chan kisses your cheek and then makes his way down your neck with his lips. 
“Chan,” you moan out. 
“Yeah, baby?”
Fuck. That goes right to your head and makes your stomach flip. 
He presses another wet kiss to your exposed collarbone and your head tilts back, knocking against the wall. He’s making it impossible to try and get any words out.
The hand on your ribcage squeezes when you let out a breathy exhale. 
“Did you need something?” he mouths against your neck and bites down right after. 
Oh, that cocky motherfucker. 
“Fuck, Chan…!” You pull at his hair. 
He brings his head up with a dopey look on his face, eyes half lidded and hazy. 
“Hm?” he hums and leans in, pressing another kiss to your check. 
One of your hands comes down and runs over his chest. You grab a hold of his tie and twist it around your hand before yanking on it. Your lips are right next to his ear and you make sure to let out hot exhales.
Chan gasps and presses a hand on the wall next to your head to keep his balance. A shiver wracks his body.
“You’re starting something you can’t finish.” The low, gravel timbre of your voice shocks even you for a moment. It’s raspy and sexy. It has an effect it has on Chan immediately. His pupils dilate and he takes a sharp intake of air.
“Oh, princess,” Chan bites your earlobe before blowing against it lightly. “I’ve never started something I didn’t intend on finishing.”
God, his voice. It’s like running your fingers over velvet. You yank his tie to the side and drag him towards the room like he’s on a leash.
Chan lets out a surprised grunt, but follows you nonetheless. Just like your little puppy begging you for your attention.
The entire walk over to the door, his hands are on your body. Anywhere Chan can reach, he’s touching you. 
When you push open the door, you’re happily surprised to find an empty dressing room. All the lights are off– perfect.
Once you both are inside, the door shuts and you push Chan against the back of it. Your lips desperately smashing together.
He’s everywhere on your body. His hands don’t stay in the same place for more than two seconds before he’s groping somewhere else. 
Blindly, he reaches for the door handle and clicks the lock in place. 
Your fist is still tightly curled around his tie, you wind it around your hand a few more times while your tongues tango. Sinfully wet noises emanate from your locked lips. Your other hand runs down his chest to unbutton his blazer.
Chan pushes off the wall and shucks the blazer off his shoulders, dropping it onto the ground. 
Never once do his lips leave yours. He’s intoxicating, you can’t get enough and neither can he.
He backs you up again until your ass hits a counter.
In one smooth movement, Chan reaches down and grabs your waist and lifts you onto the countertop. Your legs part and he stands in between them.
“This fucking dress,” he growls against your lips and nips your bottom one lightly. Desperately, he begins grabbing at the fabric, bunching it up around your hips. Underneath, you’re still clothed in stockings, corsets, spandex shorts, and many more.
He doesn’t seem to care. With both hands now grabbing your nylon-clad thighs, he brings both of your legs to wrap around his waist.
As soon as both of your hips meet, moans leave both of your mouths and you swallow each other’s. He’s hard as a fucking rock against you. So many layers of clothing separate the two of you from one another, it’s endlessly frustrating.
You pull his tie even tighter and one of his hands comes down to grip the edge of the counter for balance. 
Your hips roll against his once and he has to tighten his grip so much his knuckles turn white. 
“Do it again,” he whines against your mouth.
Who are you to say no? 
Again, you roll your hips up into his. This time, his hard cock rubs right against your clothed clit. It’s just enough to send a ripple down your legs and into your toes and they curl in your Prada heels.
You don’t stop in between hip rolls this time, you do it again and again and again. Each one feels better than the next.
It’s like your head goes underwater, deep within the riptide of the oceans of pleasure. 
And by the noises that are coming out of Chan’s mouth, you know he feels the same way. 
His hips begin to meet your thrusts with his own. Both of you are grinding into each other like teenagers in your parents’ basement. 
But you both are so needy at this moment that you’ll take anything you can get to scratch that insatiable itch. 
With each thrust, his exhales get heavier and heavier, whimpers and whines come out in between them. 
Your head kicks back against the mirror behind you after one particularly delicious roll. There’s no way you’re even on planet Earth right now with how much he’s making your body thrum.
“Fuck, babygirl,” he moans out and kisses your bare shoulder. 
You pull on his tie absentmindedly while you cry out when he thrusts even harder. 
“Wanna hear those moans with you on my cock,” he hisses when your legs tighten around his waist. “If I’m making you feel this good without touching you, think of how loud you’ll scream when I can finally fuck you into my mattress.”
“Chan-!” you whimper, your eyes squint closed, mouth falling open.
How is he so fucking good at this? Those dancer hips are merciless. It sends just the right amount of pleasure through your body.
“You know that Vogue photoshoot you did last month?” he moans into your ear, his lips right next to it. 
Your Vogue photoshoot was a borderline boudoir shoot. Only a black sheet covered you in most of your shots.
All you’re able to do is whine out an “uh-huh”.
“Babygirl, I can’t even think about that shoot without my cock getting hard. God, fu–huck! Shit.”
He’s going to make you cum just by grinding on you. You can feel it coming closer and closer. 
One of his hands travels up your body to grab at the side of your neck, his thumb caressing your jawline while he licks and nips at the other side. 
“Want you to pose like that for me. I want you all to myself.” He sounds like he would eat you whole if he could. And fuck, you would let him.
He could tell you to get on your knees and bark right now and you would.
“Close, Chan…” you whimper.
Just hearing that he’s going to make you cum makes his eyes roll in his skull. Every single wet dream of his is coming true under his own two hands. He has Y/N L/N’s legs wrapped around his waist, his cock pressed against her clothed cunt, her skin in his mouth.
Is this what winning felt like?
“You gonna cum for me babygirl?” he hisses and bites your neck.
“Yes! Shit! Don’t stop, please!”
When you try to meet his thrusts, your hips stutter, they’re unable to keep up with how fast he begins moving.
“Need you to cum, babygirl, need it so bad. Need it like I need oxygen.” Chan’s hand moves and he pulls your lips together.
He’s all consuming.
Three more thrusts and your body seizes, your orgasm gripping you so tightly that you think you might black out. 
You break free from his kiss to throw your head back. It thuds against the mirror. Your legs tighten around him so much he can barely move.
Chan rolls his hips a few more times, letting you ride out your mind-blowing orgasm. Each one is slower and more sensual than the last.
After a few seconds, your legs loosen up a bit around him. Chan trails softer kisses down your neck, over both of your collarbones, then back up to your cheeks.
They’re gentle and sweet. So different from the way he was absolutely devouring you mere moments ago.
“Chan,” you pant out. “Let me help you.”
“Soon, baby. Not here.”
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a gold card– a hotel roomkey. 
Chan leans forward and presses a long kiss to your swollen lips. While he’s attached to you, he slips the roomkey into the top of your dress where your breasts sat.
“The Mark, room 103. Fuck The Plaza, you have your own afterparty to attend to.”
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demieyesore · 21 days
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Sam Monroe with an Only Fans
This post contains NSFW headcanons, be warned
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Small A/n - You guys don’t understand. Now I have to make a series out of this. It wouldn’t be like an actual series series but I’m thinking multiple Drabbles with links to Twitter videos that I feel like he would post on his Only Fans ❤️
Tag List - @vixxensvoid @maevesversion @sockiess @stylesslytherinskywalker @myheadhurtscutely @yourenogoodforme @gallerygourmet @heartsforanakin @viper-0800 @helendeath @ysrjune
He has a Prince Albert piercing 1000%.
Absolutely LOVES the camera; constantly asking you if you want to be in a video with him but never pushing your boundaries. I can just imagine him coming into your shared living room while you’re binging a TV show, camera in hand with a mischievous grin on his face before saying something like, “Wanna help me out with work?”
Doesn’t really care for having his face in pictures or videos, but when he does, the cinematography is elite. He just KNOWS how to make masterpieces. Honestly the poses and camera work alone is so hot and appealing.
If you have certain kinks, he would make mental notes about them and incorporate them into his Only Fans
Has most definitely posted whimper audios on Twitter with a link to his Only Fans that has the visuals to the audio
Got his tongue pierced just so he could buy one of those vibrators meant for tongue piercings
I personally don’t have a foot fetish but bro has probably sucked on someone’s toes before😭
People in person (especially other guys) see him and assume he gets no bitches but in reality because of his Only Fans, SOOOOOO many girls know who he is
He definitely posts for the female gaze but like it’s actually what the girlies want, like he definitely has wrapped a pink ribbon around his cock before
His only fans is like a genuine masterpiece. He has an interest in photography for sure so his pictures always match his little emo punky aesthetic, it’s not just sex or masturbation for him
If he likes you, he definitely has had to re-record videos for his only fans because he’s accidentally moaned your name
He’s so fucking vocal it’s insane
Money wise, he’s actually financially stable because of how appealing his videos are. He most definitely isn’t the male gaze porn stuff.
Consent King for sure however he does have a CNC / Somno kink
Sam may be a sassy drug addicted emo asshole but he respects women so much. He does have a degradation kink and loves to make you go dumb, despite his respect for you
He does not even care about his family finding out, his motto is something like “They’ve been disappointed before.”
His favorite activity to do with you is “practicing” for his Only Fans, “But baby, I need to make sure the camera angles look good.” Or “Just one more time for me, this video has to be perfect.” When in reality it’s just his excuse so he can go round after round with you.
Has a designated filming room
Alright that’s all I can think of for the moment, I’m still sick so I’m sorry for no recent fics ;( I also have to deal with college and work stuff. I feel like I made him so soft in this headcanon list, I promise he’s still an angsty emo freak that will break you any chance he gets
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animehideout · 4 months
Note
So you did the JJK guys turn ons. What about their turn offs?
JJK Men Turn-Offs
a/n: Thank you anon for this request, I hope you like it ❤️
Ps: If you don't see your request posted yet it's because I'm still working on them, thank you for your understanding my loves 🫶🏻✨
Characters: Gojo Satoru / Ryomen Sukuna/ Toji Fushiguro/ Nanami Kento/ Geto Suguru/ Choso Kamo / Ino Takuma.
Check out JJK Men Turn-ons here
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Gojo Satoru: Poor Hygiene.
I see Gojo as someone who gives attention to details, to himself, his partner and in general.
He's someone that values aesthetics.
He's into self-care and likes to spend money on expensive body lotions, perfumes, nice and elegant clothes.
So poor hygiene is an immediate red flag for him, as it contradicts his preferences for cleanliness and order.
Satoru takes pride in his appearance and expects the same from people around him especially his partner.
So a partner lacking efforts in matching his level of cleanliness and appearance is a turn off for him especially with the importance he places on the way he presents himself.
Satoru believes that taking care of oneself is a form of respect for others, so for him, lack of hygiene is considered as lack consideration.
Poor hygiene disappoints him a lot and would definitely distance himself.
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Ryomen Sukuna: Inability to satisfy his sexual desires.
Driven by his desires and lust, once his partner screws up, it's over.
He has a dominant and assertive nature, wanting everything to go as he wishes.
He has high expectations and puts big emphasis on his sex life.
So his partner's / love interest's inability to satisfy his desires or refuse to do some wild crazy shit that he wants, would frustrate him and make him angry.
Sukuna won't disappoint his partner, he's literally the best at sexually pleasing them, so it's crucial that he's equally pleased and satisfied.
If his partner fails to fulfill his needs then it might trigger his impatience, making him less tolerant.
He places big importance on mutual enjoyment, if he senses any imbalance, then he's end the relationship without hesitation.
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Toji Fushiguro: Being A Drama Queen.
Toji is a straightforward and rational man.
He values smartness and efficiency, so making excessive drama or overreactions is a major turn-off for him.
He prefers logical thinking and conflicts solving over unnecessary emotional displays .
Toji is a prudent man and sees easily through dramatic actions or words any attempted manipulation from his partner.
He prefers a partner who can handle their emotions maturely and independently without causing a fuss.
Constant drama might make him feel bored or like he's dealing with a child and not a grown up adult.
For him exaggerated reactions, nagging are a waste of time, a headache stimulator and get on his nerves.
He prefers a chill, simple and laid back partner.
Would definitely distance himself without further engaging in the the relationship/ situationship.
Would feel second hand embarrassed if his partner makes a scene.
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Nanami Kento: Arrogance.
There's a difference between being self-confident and being arrogant.
The first one is a turn-on for Nanami, the second one is an immediate turn-off.
That line that separates them "attitude" makes a huge shift in the way he perceive his partner.
He finds arrogance off-putting.
He prefers a partner who is grounded and modest; traits that align with his own reserved nature.
Being an introverted man, Nanami tends to communicate in a calm and polite manner, with an arrogant partner the balance of his communication style would be disrupted.
An arrogant partner would talk down to him, which is very demeaning.
Politeness and mutual respect are necessary for Nanami, and arrogance can come across as dismissive, he finds that unappealing.
Nanami wants a genuine connection with his partner, where both of them are sincere, caring and responsible.
And arrogance brings with it selfishness and this doesn't align with how he pictures a stable, romantic relationship with a calm and harmonious environment.
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Geto Suguru: Lack Of Ambitions And Negativity.
For a man with very big dreams, lack of ambitions is pathetic.
He wants a partner to push him forward and not bring him down with their negativity.
Geto believes in constant striving for improvement and excellence, so having a partner with no dreams would definitely get into his way and waste his time.
He pities people who are too basic and too simple and sees them as weak and burden in earth.
For him only people who are willing to make an impact on society are worth living but the purposeless ones are just a waste of oxygen.
The lack of purpose means lack of personality for him, it would make him instantly disconnected and disgusted no matter how much he would be physically attracted to that person.
Geto envisions a romantic relationship as a collaboration towards achieving mutual common goals.
So lack of ambitions and negativity would hinder the formation of thus goal-oriented relationship.
If a person isn't willing to change, push boundaries and challenge themselves, then Suguru wouldn't even bother to spend another second with them.
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Choso Kamo: Talking To Other Guys.
Choso is a loyal man with a protective nature.
He prefers quality over quantity, having a loyal partner would mean the whole world to him.
A partner who engages in unnecessary or flirty conversations with other man ( even at the beginning of the relationship) would definitely make him really sad and turn him off at the spot.
Choso appreciates a reserved partner who only has eyes on him, so a gf/bf who likes to be the center of attention of other guys and constantly talk with them would make him break up with them to protect his heart and peace.
Choso wants undivided attention, he is willing to give the world to his partner, cut off all unnecessary connections if his partner feels jealous or uncomfortable and he wants the same.
Trust is crucial for Choso, and once his partner breaks that trust then it's over.
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Ino Takuma: Dry Replies.
Ino is a man who thrives on his partner's affection and attention.
So dry replies would definitely make him sad and question hus partner's feelings towards him.
Ino likes to engage in lively conversations that flow effortlessly, from sharing how was his day to his plans for tomorrow.
So being constantly faced with replies that lack enthusiasm or effort are huge turn-off for him.
He puts too much effort in the relationship so he expects the same from his partner.
Ino appreciates a partner who expresses themselves openly, and also good listener who is willing to comfort him and tell him thay everything is gonna be alright.
And receiving cold replies would disappoint him and push him away, making him think that his partner is careless about him.
Also when sharing memes. Humor is important to Ino, so dry and dull answers would make him feel embarrassed and awkward.
He cares too much, he deserves someone who would give him the attention and care he needs.
So distancing himself from a dry partner would save him his energy and save him from overthinking.
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