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flowerfan2 · 3 years

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The Etiquette of Affection

I’ve been loving Ted Lasso lately, and when I discovered that there were not very many fics in the fandom, I decided to do my part and contribute. For your reading pleasure, have a little Ted Lasso/Trent Crimm first kiss... set mid-season two. On A03 here.

In other news, I’m working on a David/Patrick AU, but it’s taking it’s time and probably won’t start posting for at least a few more weeks.

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The Crown and Anchor is boisterous and crowded, and Trent has no idea why he’s here, nursing a pint in a corner. If he wanted to properly drown his post-Christmas sorrows and try to ignore the fact that he’s alone at the start of yet another new year, he could have found any number of less sticky establishments.

Trent takes out his phone, frowns at it, frowns at himself and at his pathetic situation, and tries to find something vaguely interesting to read.

His moment of peace is disrupted by a group of people coming into the pub, and Trent winces when he sees who it is - Ted Lasso, accompanied by various Richmond staff and hangers-on. There’s a cheer of welcome as they make their way in, Richmond having won its last game, appeasing the masses until the next loss.

Trent really can’t believe that Lasso has done as well as he has, despite all the odds. Trent has a begrudging respect for the man. And, if he lets himself admit it, a teeny, tiny, just barely there bit of a crush on him.

He lets himself gaze in Lasso’s direction. There’s something compelling about him that isn’t captured by his aw shucks appearance. It’s in the way he looks at you when he’s baring his heart to the world, opening up his chest to do it. The way he tries. Lasso brings earnest to a whole new level, and doesn’t flinch. It makes Trent want to cry. This, in turn, makes him want to bash Lasso over the head. Or snog him senseless. At this point, he’ll take either one.

Just then the man’s god-awful accent cuts through the clamor of the pub’s well-lubricated patrons, and Trent ducks his head. He doesn’t want to be caught looking. He doesn’t think he can take it tonight, can hold himself together if Lasso calls him over, says “call me Ted” again, and pats him good-naturedly on the back.

Trent pays his tab and takes his leave. Outside there are remnants of dirty snow clogging the streets, colored red and green by the winking Christmas lights on store windows. Trent takes out a cigarette and lights it, inhaling deeply. He’ll just calm his nerves here for a few minutes, then make the trek back to his flat.

The door opens a few minutes later, the rush of noise getting Trent’s attention. It’s Lasso - of course it is - but he doesn’t see Trent, who has flattened himself against the wall. Lasso looks around for a moment and then heads away from the pub, whistling what sounds frighteningly like a pop song from the 80’s, until he slips and crashes to the ground.

Trent is next to him in an instant, crouching down and letting his hands flutter to Lasso’s shoulders. “Coach Lasso, are you all right?”

Lasso doesn’t open his eyes, and Trent fumbles for his phone, his heart racing. But before he can dial emergency services, Lasso’s eyes blink open.

“Coach Lasso, it’s me. Trent Crimm.”

Lasso’s mouth quirks up in a smile. “From the Independent.”

“Yes.” Trent feels a traitorous beat of happiness at the worn joke.

“What happened?”

He raises an eyebrow. “I don’t think you need me to figure it out.”

“But that’s your job. Investigation, and such.” Lasso struggles to sit up, and Trent wraps an arm around his shoulder, ignoring the fact that his own trousers are now soaked.

“Fine.” He takes an exaggerated look around. “I believe you fell on a patch of ice.”

Lasso starts to nod in agreement, but he grimaces at the movement. “That’s why you win all the awards, I can see it now.”

“Are you injured?”

Lasso seems to assess the situation, moving his arms and legs. “No, don’t seem to be any worse off than before I went down. At least other than a sore head.”

“You might have a concussion.” Trent helps him up, resisting the urge to trace his fingertips across Lasso’s head and check for a bump.

“I doubt it’s anything that impressive.” Lasso tries to brush himself off, but the slush has soaked into his (very well fitted) jeans, and he sighs. “Oh well, tomorrow’s laundry day anyway.” He looks at Trent, and something flits across his expression that Trent can’t catch. “Thank you, Trent Crimm from the Independent.”

Trent tries to suppress his answering smile, but he does a poor job. “It was nothing.” They stand there in silence for a strange, extenuated moment, and then Trent opens his mouth and - figuratively - leaps.

“May I walk you home?” He refrains from explaining himself any further, although the excuses are on the tip of his tongue - in case Lasso is actually concussed, to make sure he gets some safely.

Lasso’s face brightens with unaffected pleasure. “Why, that’s mighty nice of you. Thank you.”

They walk in silence towards Lasso’s flat, both of them with their hands shoved into their pockets, elbows brushing occasionally when they shift to the side to allow another pedestrian to pass. Trent knows Lasso lives near Brewers Lane, and he’s not surprised when Lasso comes to a stop a few minutes later, digging a key out of his pocket.

Trent draws in a deep breath, ready to say good night, when Lasso shoots him a shy smile. “Want to come up? I won’t make you tea, but I’ve got some hot chocolate, or pop. I’d offer you a real drink, but given what I’ve learned from far too many lectures about concussions - not my own, mind you - that’s probably off the table.”

When Lasso stops babbling Trent tilts his head and nods, and Lasso laughs. “A man of few words. I can’t imagine you’ve ever been called that before. Come on.”

Trent follows Lasso up the stairs and into his flat. It’s surprisingly nice, warm and welcoming, like everything about Lasso.

Lasso busies himself making the hot chocolate - from packets, in the microwave - and serves it with a plate of biscuits that unlike the hot cocoa seem to be homemade.

“Did someone make these for you?” Trent asks, and Lasso grins from the other side of the couch.

“Me, myself and I, I’m afraid.”

“No need to apologize. They’re quite good.”

Trent sips the hot chocolate, avoiding the miniature marshmallows. Lasso starts talking about a holiday dinner at Higgins’ home, how all the players brought their favorite foods. How he’s so fortunate to be a part of the Richmond family.

Trent finds himself wishing he could have been there.

“Why’d you leave?” Lasso asks, and Trent wonders if he missed the lead-in to this question.

“Leave where?”

“The pub. Tonight. You were there, but when I went to talk to you, you were gone.”

Trent finds himself held in Lasso’s searching gaze, and he doesn’t have any choice but to tell the truth. “You.”

Lasso rears back in mock offense. “Now, that is not what I wanted to hear. What have I done this time?”

Trent tries to answer, he really does. But Lasso is blinking at him so sincerely, he can’t find the words. Throwing caution to the wind for the second time tonight, he leans in, close, until he can feel Lasso’s breath on his cheek.

“May I kiss you?” he whispers, hardly breathing.

“Always so formal,” Lasso responds, and then Lasso closes the distance. It’s soft and tentative, until it isn’t, both of them sliding closer, Trent finally getting his hand in Lasso’s hair, trading eager kisses until they are forced to pull back to breathe.

Lasso leans his forehead against Trent’s and lets out a low chuckle. “Trent Crimm from the Independent, now will you call me Ted?”

Trent laughs too, feeling lighter than he can remember. “Yes, Ted. I think I can manage that.”

#Ted Lasso #Trent Crimm #Ted Lasso fic #Ted/Trent #rare pair right now but who knows what might happen

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graphite1127 · 3 years

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hey. HEY! make that k-pop post you want to do!

I am so glad you asked!

I like k-pop, and I’m tired of pretending I don’t. I recognize that there are problems within the community, but I want to get it off my chest that I still enjoy it as a genre. I say this because it’s literally the only “fandom” I’m a part of that I’m not open about.

It’s hard to put into words, but I’m going to try. Because I think I know why I never talk about it as one of my interests, and it has everything to do with the obvious:

- Some fans are insane (and not just about shipping real people)

- The unrealistic beauty standards are always right in your face

- Idols are pushed to the point of developing eating disorders among other things; their lives are very restricted.

These are serious problems. They can’t be ignored and brushed aside, so when you say you like k-pop, you risk others assuming that you condone all the bad stuff that comes with it. There’s a negative stigma.

This is not a post apologizing for other people’s behavior. If anything, I’m trying to call it out. Like maybe if I bring attention to what the actual problem is, we can help fix it.

I was very hesitant to get into k-pop. When I was being introduced, it was via someone I barely knew who was obsessive in a way that made me uncomfortable. I thought, “This community is not okay. K-pop is a nightmare.”

But much later, when my sister got into it, I backtracked and thought to myself, “You know, I’ve been a part of fanbases that are less than ideal. Maybe I’ll just check it out and it won’t be that bad.” And it really wasn’t.

There was so much variety within the music. The music videos were so much more interesting (I never watched mv’s that much before because they seemed really dull, but now I love them). The groups dance as well as sing. And there’s overall just so much content. It gave me more entertainment that actually made me happy.

I think that’s the part of it that I’m trying to spread to others. The music itself and the group members are overall very uplifting! And I found myself getting more and more into it as time went on. The more you watch/listen, the more you enjoy and all that. Even my mom really enjoys it, and it’s given us more to talk about.

And if k-pop just isn’t something that piqued your interest? For no particular reason? That’s okay! This post isn’t to pressure you to suddenly enjoy it; I’m mostly just ranting with no direction.

Maybe this is a cry for help. Like, if better people become involved with it, we can lessen the toxicity? Fuck if I know. Again, this is a directionless rant. There is no clear purpose. I tend to ramble and I’m sorry. Maybe someone else can put it into better words instead of sounding like a 12-year-old defending pewdiepie or some shit.

But yeah, if you were on the fence about it and don’t know where to start, I’ll list a bunch of stuff in a bit.

Bottom line: Please acknowledge the problems within the k-pop community. They need to be addressed and fixed. Also please understand where the problems stem from.

The problem isn’t this:

It’s this:

Don’t be a jerk! Enjoy stuff, but not at the expense of others - i.e. working idols to the brink of exhaustion, obsessing over them, not letting them live their own lives, sending death threats and hate comments, bashing others because you really like one group in particular. Cause that shit is insane and though I know for certain the majority are good people, the bad ones stick out like a sore thumb and leave a much greater impact.

Be one of the good ones! There’s lots of genres of k-pop, so here’s some stuff that I personally enjoy if you’re interested:

No Rules - TXT (check out the dance practice for this one too if you want) This one’s been in my head all week. It’s your average pop song but it is so so catchy.

God’s Menu - Stray Kids rap/hip hop, it goes hard, one of my favorites

Singularity - V This is actually by BTS, but it’s a solo song by V. It has an R&B vibe to it if you’re into that *chef’s kiss*

Dumb Dumb - Red Velvet Their music videos are always some of my favorites.

K.O. - SF9 The dance practice for this one is one of the best I have ever seen. It’s what I’ve linked. Right off the bat, they start with this crazy pinwheel thing. It’s really neat.

Shoot Me- Day6 has an alternative rock feel to it. This group actually plays instruments. They’re a band-band.

Hot Sauce - NCT Dream This one has a latin pop vibe to it, very fun and upbeat

Other favorites of mine:

-Humph! by Pentagon

-Mansae by Seventeen

-Drunk-Dazed by Enhypen

-Awkward Silence by Stray Kids

-Ugh! by BTS

-Mic Drop also by BTS

-Ko Ko Bop by EXO

-Make a Wish by NCT U

-Married to the Music by SHINee

-We Do by SuperM

-Very Good by Block B

(Among many others)

Uh, so yeah. I’m not sure where else to go with this. I just have a lot of feelings and I don’t know how else to share them. Thank you for coming to my ted talk. Send tweet.

#half of me is like literally who gives a shit about this #the other half is like 'you are part of the problem if you participate in any way'#please be nice #i just like the music #and a lot of idols give me serotonin #like j-hope #kpop #rant #long post #tw blood #tw self harm #tw obsessive behavior

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i-cant-sing · 3 years

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Hey I know this sounds weird but do you have any tips for writing fanfics with Endeavor?? I’m thinking of writing a thing for him but I’m scared it will be too OOC or it wouldn’t make sense, sorry for bothering you 🥺 I absolutely love your work by the way! I love reading your content because it is 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻 (I really love the sultana’s favorite because it is really good as well as your yandere platonic Todoroki family stuff) also I hope you have a lovely day :)

Ahhh thank you! I’m so glad you enjoyed them!

Hmm, I could really give one writing advice:

Write what you want to read

Yep, I have been on this site for almost 2 years and I’ve seen a lot of theories and opinions on not only characters but also on fanfics. I know a lot of people who hate Enji with a burning passion, like they wish they could travel into the fantasy world and kill him. And I’ve seen people be absolutely brutal to the writers who write for him, especially if they write him as a nice guy. And its really sad to see such wonderful writers be bashed like that and for what?

I started writing in December I think and my 1st post was about yandere Enji and I wrote him as a soft yandere. I was a bit scared that people were gonna bash me for it but then I remember that its just a piece of writing for a fictional character. If people are gonna be mad, well thats just too bad. This is my comfort character and I will write him how I want to.

Even with the Todoroki family, an idea I have had for almost an year, I wondered if people were gonna be accepting of this idea. I never thought it would blow up like this; that so many people would fall in love with this platonic yandere family. But because I was happy with my works, other people like it too.

So, just remember this. Write what you want to read, and if you’re satisfied with it, post it. There will always be people who will like it.

Don’t write it to please the masses. Write it for yourself.

Oh and don’t forget to tag me! I’d love to read your take on yandere Enji. :)

Yes, this did inflate my ego. I'm just waiting for TED talks to contact me now.

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jellyfishinc · 3 years

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Good Morning Everyone

Before I begin, I just want it on the record: I am a 26 year old middle class white girl who is only talking about the movies mentioned from a moviegoer’s perspective, and is not in any way shape or form trying to suggest she knows anything except her personal opinion.

Since by now Disney Pixar’s Soul has dropped on Disney+, and judging by the reactions I’ve been seeing, that no doubt that means we’re all worried about how well it’s going to do overall with the general public, and are no doubt worried in the long run it’s going to be labeled as another flop.

But I what I really want you folks to remember is that some of the best films were also initially labeled as cinematic flops, or as doing mediocre at the Box Office, and all it took for them to be respected as such was that same thing we’re all wishing we had more of: Time.

Example 1: The Nightmare Before Christmas

To date, there’s still debate on whether it’s a Christmas movie, Halloween movie, or both, despite the director’s official statement on it. Tim still gets fan mail thanking him for making it, claiming it saved their lives.

If you haven’t already, I suggest you go watch the episode about it from The Holiday Movies that Made Us, so you can get a good look at all the time and effort that went into making this movie into what it is.

Even with all the initial lukewarm reception, it’s a classic film that still holds up, even after all this time, and it was made by misfits, for misfits.

Example 2: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty remake

A lot of people legitimately forget that this movie even exists, but I have noticed that once they’ve actually tracked it down and given it a fair shot, a popular reaction I’ve seen is, “Why didn’t this do so well if it’s so great?”

And I have to say, after seeing it myself, I have to agree. It has a message that I know for a fact that many can relate to, especially if you’re like me and are still at a stage in your life where there’s so much you want to do with your life.

I have no doubt that given even more time, this movie will come to be given the respect it deserves.

Example 3: Tim Burton’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Note: In case it’s not obvious already, I do have a bit of a soft spot for Tim Burton films, but that doesn’t make what I’m saying about them any less important.

I won’t go as far as to say that it was necessarily a flop, but I do know for a fact that it was heavily criticized by people who had already made up their minds to hate it because the original film had already been around for a long time.

And for those that may come across this post: I respect your opinion, and I won’t waste your time listing all the complaints people had about this film, but I want to at least touch on a few that stand out, because because I feel like there’s some of you out there that are judging it too harshly because you don’t know the full extent of everything that happened with both films.

The first one: Roald Dahl hated the original film, so much so, that the planned sequel that would’ve followed Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, was promptly dropped. It’s because of that that after he’d passed, his widow flat out refused to let anyone else touch the story again.

And that didn’t change when she was approached by Tim Burton about it, either. But because it’s Tim, he clearly knew how skeptical she would be because of it, so he was very respectful and showed her some of the concept art he had drawn up for the film.

Her reaction? She LOVED it. In particular, the design for the Bucket house. If any of you wondered why it looked so crooked and funny, there’s actually a reason for it. Tim had it specifically designed after Roald Dahl’s famous writing shed. And it was that that convinced her the story would be in good hands, and she gave him her blessing to make the film.

Number two: Johnny Depp’s Wonka Portrayal

Many have criticized his portrayal as being too weird and a far cry from Gene Wilder’s portrayal, which for many believe is what ruined the remake.

For the record: I used to agree with you, until I saw a very in-depth analysis that managed to show me what I had missed initially.

Essentially what it said was that it’s actually a more accurate idea of what would happen to a person who willingly shuts himself away from the outside world, with only his workers for company.

And I am absolutely not to make light of where America is right now, but consider: we all make jokes about how we’re all going to be an antisocial wreck when we’re finally allowed to resume like normal, having not seen hardly anyone in person in weeks, maybe even months at a time.

Now imagine instead the pandemic lasts for years, from when he had to let everyone at the factory go, all the way to when he finally decided to reopen to a select few. What do you think a person who goes through something like that would look like?

Like it’s shown in the film. And on top of it, he’s also portrayed as someone who suffers from flashbacks of traumatizing moments in his life, and while I personally don’t suffer from them, according to those that do, it’s a very accurate portrayal.

There's also a whole analysis I did about how this Wonka has undiagnosed autism, but I'll be nice and just say a lot of his personality suggests it.

But like with the other listed films, more and more people have been revisiting this film with this new knowledge and found it’s value.

But please don’t take this as me bashing the original, because that’s not what I’m trying to do. If you still like the original even after knowing all this, that’s fine. You’re more than welcome to say so. All I want to do is share the truth.

Example 4: How the Grinch Stole Christmas, live action adaptation

I've seen everyone including the Nostalgia Critic have nothing but disdain for this film, and it seems to me that it's largely because of the same problem Charlie and the chocolate factory did: they thought the original was better.

What I have to say about it is they both have equal value, and to me still have the same message, even if the live action remake came at it from a different angle.

In the original cartoon, the Grinch just hated Christmas and that was that. The Whos loved Christmas, and that was that. Even when she Grinch stole everything, the Whos were still happy. And it's my firm opinion it was just a reflection on the time period it was made, in that Christmas was just a holiday to celebrate with family and friends.

In comparison, the live action remake was more of a reflection of how Christmas was already rapidly changing into the commercialized holiday we have now. And in that regard, it's incredibly clever to set up the film like this, because, again, with time, we start to sympathize with the Grinch more, because most of what he says about how people treat Christmas is true.

Some were okay with him hating Christmas just for the sake of hating it, but if you can invent a backstory that's not only plausible, but relatable, then I'm all for it.

So now that I’ve taken up about 5 minutes you’ll never get back, what does this all mean for Soul?

Only that even if it does flop, it will be in good company, because flopping has proven to be a rite of passage for many of the great films, and given enough time, it will get the respect and recognition it deserves.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk :)

#not spn #disney pixar soul #soul #pixar soul #movie flops #nightmare before christmas #charlie and the chocolate factory #secret life of walter mitty #rant #this is what happens when i have a thought that won't leave me alone #now you all get to listen to it too #thanks for coming to this ted talk

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oldtimefamilybaseball · 4 years

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Sorry for the long break in between posts. (Or, if I’m in the mood to be particularly old-timey, “missives.”) Since I last was back here, we had an election ... that, uh, is still somehow not over. (Well, except that it is.) The World Series was played and somehow Youppi’s curse over the Dodgers is over. (The Dodgers had not won a World Series since Youppi was ejected from a game in 1989.) And, oh yeah, there’s a raging pandemic running rampant over the country.

Sadly, there is no more Major League Baseball to watch while we’re huddled inside, staying safe and socially distant from other people. But that doesn’t mean there’s no baseball. The KBO playoffs are happening every morning -- if you’re willing to get up early enough.

Or, you could dive into Mexican Pacific League in the evening! Or the Dominican Winter League! That one has a nifty streaming package for only $20! And while you’re watching, you can see Juan Francisco -- maybe a few lbs heavier than his playing days -- bash baseballs again. And just check out these amazing unis he’s wearing! This is what I wish the Marlins uniforms looked like:

Dude is just wearing #111 like there are no rules anymore pic.twitter.com/zE8qAcey8v

Of course, this is also the time to catch up with reading and books and movies -- whether about baseball or not. Personally, if you’re looking for something to soothe your weary head and keep you from being perpetually anxious, I recommend Ted Lasso on Apple+. It may not be the funniest show, but it basically takes Major League, sets it in England, and fills it with nice and well-meaning people.

And if reading is what you’re after, you’re in luck! Here are some stories I’ve worked on recently:

Negro Leagues statistics have often been referred to as something mysterious and unknowable. But that’s simply not the case -- and part of the issue is that the people who set the rules for these things in the 1960s didn’t care about the Negro Leagues. Fortunately, a group of researchers are diving into microfiche and box scores and old scorebooks and are assembling the most complete data there is. Mule Suttles, the single-season home run leader, just added two more to his total this month after new box scores were found! That’s amazing!

Ken Griffey Jr. is now a Sounders part-owner. Sadly, he is not going to be on the pitch.

Awards season may be over, but the awards that really should have been given out like best quarantine mustache never were. So, I tried to fix that.

Some games are good. Some games are bad. And some games are terrifying. Here are nine of the most frightening.

And here are a few stories I didn’t write, but are worth your time:

You know I love scary stories. So, my good friend Matt Monagan told the creepiest tale of all about Rochester’s haunted baseball field.

Mike Petriello looked at all the data about position players pitching that you wanted to know, but were probably too scared to ask. The offseason are for fun and bizarre baseball stories!

It’s not baseball, but if you’re an Old Time Family Baseball person you probably care about uniform design. Here’s a ranking of all of the NHL’s new Reverse Retro jerseys. My personal favorite is the Minnesota Wild’s gorgeous update on the old North Stars unis.

Anyway, stay safe! Have a great holiday -- and if you’re traveling, get tested and isolate! See you next week!

#mlb #baseball #top bar

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xombigirl · 4 years

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So. Somewhat(maybe?)unpopular opinion time.

I need to preface this by saying that I love Sam Riegel. I think he’s funny, smart, quick-witted, talented, a great father and an equally great husband(to both his spouses). So do NOT take this post as me bashing Sam or his, frequently amazing, RP choices.

I hate how Nott keeps trying to push Fjord and Jester. I really, truly do. I’ve been sitting on this for a while now but this week’s episode just really soured me on the whole idea. They’re in a dirty fucking bathroom in an Inn. And Nott is making jokes about Fjord trying to get Jester alone. Really? Come on, this heteronomativity is getting so fucking old. I was talking with someone else about it and we agreed that if any kind of ship is going to happen(or not happen which is also fine!)with Jester we wish it would just fucking happen. I am sick and tired of the B*auj*st*r shippes calling out the Wi*oj*st shippers. I’m sick of the intense drama surrounding the Fj*rest*r shippers and while I myself am staunchly in the WJ corner(when it comes to Jester ships)I just want some kind of closure. For any of these ships. And if Jester decides to not be with anyone THEN THAT’S FINE TOO.

But back to my point, I love Nott as a character, I do, and no she’s not perfect(none of these characters are!!)but the racism and the heteronomativity is killing me Samuel. KILLING. ME. Someone brought up another good point that Nott knows how Beau feels about Jester but thought it would be a good idea to poke at the FJ stuff right fucking in front of her. After she’s had to confront her fucking awful family. Seriously uncool.

TL:;DR I love Sam and I love Nott but god she frustrates the hell out of me sometimes.

Thank you coming to my TED Talk.

#cr spoilers #cr discourse

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gwennovynne · 5 years

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So I was working with a student on a discussion forum today and the topic was about gender stereotypes in Disney movies. The professor wanted students to explain whether or not they thought gender stereotyping was still prevalent in children’s media, and asked for examples. In the assignment description, he suggested comparing Cinderella to Mulan and explaining the differences.

Well. One severely asinine student posted about how Mulan was still sexist because Mulan, the woman, couldn’t complete the “trials” in training and got made fun of for it, while the men, on the other hand, were competent.

I was like ???? well that’s not even a little right

BUT THEN

All the other students read her post and started parroting her! Soon, at least six other students had posted about how Mulan was sexist due to the fact that she “wasn’t good” at physical “trials” while the men were more skillful. “Disney constantly showed Mulan falling behind!” said one student. “They showed little girls that Mulan wasn’t as good as the boys because she’s a girl and not as strong,” explained another.

But the problem with that is...that’s....that’s not how Mulan went at all? Then I started wondering “do people out there really think this?”

So, bored Tumblr user, I implore you to think back to the scene all these students suddenly started referring to: the iconic “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” sequence. Remember how Mulan kept screwing up? Yeah? Well, do you also remember how everyone else kept screwing up too?

Fun fact! None of those arrows were even Mulan’s! No one could hit the target. The only one that did was Shang and, well, he was the captain, so I sure hope he can hit the target.

Then we even have an entire...verse? is that what it’s called? A verse? I don’t know, I’m an English major, don’t look at me for musical terms. We have an entire verse where the secondary characters--Ling, Yao, and Chen Po--literally sing about their struggles even though they’re men.

“I’m never gonna catch my breath!”

“Say goodbye to those who knew me!”

“Boy was I a fool in school for cutting gym!”

“Now I really wish that I knew how to swim!”

None of them could do it! It wasn’t just Mulan! The whole!!!! point!!! of!!! this scene!!! was that no one could do it. In the scene where they shoot at the archery target, no one makes the shot. When they’re running? Everyone looks pained and out of breath. When they all fire the cannons, no one hits the Shan Yu dummy. Mulan wasn’t unsuccessful because she “was a girl,” she was unsuccessful because she was essentially just thrown into boot camp with no training! Most of those guys were!

But, do you remember anything else from that iconic musical number?

Mulan is the one who proved they could do it. Mulan is the one who proved they could do it. Mulan is the one that proved they could do it.

Not only was everyone else struggling, but Mulan was the first one to look at that pole and say “fuck ya arrow, Shang” and climb up there. She figured out how to use the weights. She fells several times, but she kept getting back up. Mulan was out there all night until the break of dawn until she got it right.

After that, Mulan is shown leading the rest. In fact, she gets better than Shang! She’s ahead of him while running and she successfully knocks him down while fighting.

Anyway. My attention span isn’t very long but you get the gist. It kind of irks me that people were missing the point of “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” so badly that...they were just...missing the point? I mean, come on! That’s a great scene! Everyone learns together, they stick together! And they all end up with mad respect for Mulan too, even after they find out she’s a woman.

Mulan’s like “hey I know how to get into the palace but you guys have to follow me. and also dress in drag” and the rest of the guys are like “this might as well happen” and just go with her plan! Because she’s smart! And they recognize and respect this!

Bash this movie for any other reason that you want (historical inaccuracy, sure) but for the love of god, don’t miss the point of the entire movie musical number, become a parrot, and post it in a discussion forum where a very angry TA is going to see it. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk grab a water on your way out

#mulan #long post #disney #shitposting #controversial #i'll make a man out of you

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hopelesstargazer · 5 years

Text

End of the Year Tag

So....I was tagged by @saijspellhart....never done one of these before so here goes nothing.

~favourite food?~

Okay, so I am a Minnesota raised girl and do love a good wild rice hotdish (and yes there is a difference between hotdish and casserole and if you don’t know, let me know so I can explain!). However my favorite food is either pupusas or pozole (latino cuisine). Both of them I over eat when my godchildren cook them for me and never regret it!

~favourite drink?~

Ummmm....Diet Pespi. Yeah, we won’t get into how cranky I get if I don’t have at least one pop a day. My godsons might have a story or two about how possessive I get in the late morning over my can of pop on the weekends....

~favourite clothing?~

My Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fleece pants and my long sleeve Cuddle-Duds. Comfort for the win. After a long day of dealing with people, nothing is more comforting than cozy wear.

~favourite product?~

.....Pespi?.....I think. Does that count when you are an addict? Like can a pot head say that their favorite product is potbrownies? If not, I would say Google! Because it owns me and my information searching needs. After all, if you don’t know something, Lord Google will know it. Thus, All Hail Lord Google!

~favourite month?~

I’ve never thought about it. I guess you could say I like March. It was the month I was born and I like the little myth that comes with the month. The month of the Lion and the Lamb. My grandmother (a wonderful mother to 11 and a farmer in Northern MN) would always tell me that you knew how the month would go in the very beginning. If the weather was shitty and roaring at the start, it would leave calm and sweet at the end. Or in other words, if March came in like a Lion, it would leave like a Lamb. Of course, the opposite applies as well. If this is true, I honestly couldn’t say. I think it does, but I’m already bias so who really knows?

~favourite season?~

I’m fond of either Spring or Fall. It’s not too cold, but it’s not too hot. You really get those glorious days where the sun is shining, the air is crisp, and there is a magnitude of colors everywhere. It is just rejuvenating.

~favourite holiday?~

I’m partial to Easter. And before you ask, yes I happen to be Christian, BUT that is not why I like the holiday. I like Easter because it symbolizes rebirth. It symbolizes a new beginning, a fresh start. When you go into this season, you might have just experienced a shitty winter or the pervious year was just horrific. Thus, your soul is all crusty and flaky and thinking that nothing gets better. Then this season of new beginnings start and there are baby animals, new flowers, laughing children, and brightly colored eggs everywhere! It is a reminder that life is nothing more than a cycle. Yes, horrible things can and will happen to you. Yes, it will be dark and sad to deal with it all. Winter, both figuratively (in your heart/soul) and literally, SUCK ASS! But! BUT! There will always be a moment of something new. Something bright. Something colorful. Something living. Something that will bring you up out of the ground of cold despair and into the light of a new beginning. Even if it is for a moment, it is there. Easter is the holiday/season that best represents what it means to be human. A shitty start that only turns into the brightest and warms of sun rays. And that is my Ted Talk, thank you for listening.

~favourite place?~

Minnehaha Falls! Gooseberry Falls! Or any waterfall. I adore waterfalls. The sound of crashing water and rushing waves drowning out bad thoughts. The scent of crisp water pulling you into the moment. The sensations of moving water rumbling in your chest. The sight of dancing sprites in the sky as water droplets create rainbows. Cold water taking the heat from your body only to leave a pleasant tingle in its wake. *blush**cough* I’ll stop with the poetry now.

~best experience?~

So, I took a trip to Scotland with my Father at the beginning of this year. I would definitely say that was my best experience of 2018.

~best song?~

Best song? Of all time or this year? This year I really like Burning Man by Dierks Bentley. Of all time, you can’t beat the Hokey Pokey. It is a must have dance song at every public gathering. I have no shame when I say that I request it and drag EVERYONE to the dance floor.

~best movie?~

We have to clarify this nonsense for next year. Honestly, it’s just too vague. Best movie? This year? Of all time? Genre? Or is it just me that over thinks this stuff? *sigh* Okay, I thought Black Panther was extremely good, not just because it was an excellent superhero movie, had amazing female leads, astonishing action sequences, and wonderful humor. It really made me think about how hatred can pass down through the generations. It made me reevaluate how I teach my students in karate class and how I speak with/to them about social problems. Since most of them are immigrants or children of immigrants, it was an eye opening experience. Let’s leave it at that.

~best series?~

TV series right? (again with the over thinking simple questions) I really enjoyed Miraculous Ladybug, Voltron, How to Train Your Dragon, The Dragon Prince, and My Hero Academia. Granted, I also rewatch a bunch of anime classics as I taught the ways of being a nerd to my godsons. I’m proud to say that we have finally left the realm of Naruto and moved on to the great chasm that is known as Deathnote and One Piece.

~best book?~

Okay, so this one is exciting for me. I was suffering Tumblr and found a post that simple said “if Deadpool wrote a book, this would be it.” So of course, the ten year that still loves poop jokes and crude humor in me scream in joy and bought the book. It is called “Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology” by Cory O’Brien. I wish I could find the link so you could read some excerpts from it. I’ll just have to quote it.

“So one night Uranus is about to get busy with Gaia again I guess so he can father another baby and then stuff it back into her but instead of getting sex he gets a SURPRISE PENISECTOMY”

“So the moral of the story is that if you are not ready to be a father consider all of your options before skipping directly to cannibalism”

“ARE YOU READY FOR DISTENDED RACCOON TESTICLES? NO? WELL, YOU BETTER GET READY QUICK BECAUSE JAPAN JUST CALLED AND IT’S ‘BOUT TO DELIVER ONE WHOPPER OF A BALLSACK TO THE BAINPAN”

“So the moral of the story is that we should seriously consider firing the moon because I didn’t know we could do that and I bet we have the technology now to genetically engineer a WAY BETTER MOON than some dumb rabbit.”

So...10/10, greatest book I’ve read this year

~best video game?~

I don’t play many video games. Frankly, if it is not a bashing the buttons kind of game, I’m no good at it. Thus, I really like Shounen Jump battle game. I can hit random buttons while having no real skills. I also like watching people play them. That would lead me to Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Such a pretty game!

~have you unlearned any bad habits?~

hahahaha...oh, are you serious?

~biggest disappointment?~

I didn’t get back into college like I planned on. I just couldn’t find the time to give myself in order to achieve what I wanted.

~worst experience?~

If we are talking about this year, then that would go to almost dying in a bus accident in the middle of the Highlands in Scotland. It’s a great story that I love to tell, because it turns out to be the funniest tale of my really long list of horrific stories. Minus the thought of dying on some random hill and how inconvenient it would have been for my mother to retrieve our bodies cause I didn’t buy travel insurance.

However, if we are talking about ever in our lives, then that golden trophy would go to the time I, a store manager at Dollar Tree, was threaten with a plastic shank over $0.50 on hour 15 of my shift where I slept in the store that night so I could be there for the delivery at 5AM. That was horrible. Funny in hindsight, but horrible at the same time. Let me know, I can tell that story too.

~any new hobbies?~

Where do people find the time to start new hobbies? Serious, could you donate that precious time into a bank so I could have some? I would greatly appreciate it.

~did you achieve your goals for 2018?~

hahahahahaha....oh, you’re serious again?

~have you fulfilled a long-term wish?~

Ah, this it did! So, back in 2011, I studied abroad in Scotland and vowed to take my father back so he could see the country that I fell completely in love with. Severely in love with. Like, I would marry any Scottish man that said to me, “Ach, lassie, yer bonnie and me heart tis yers. I have this castle in ta middle of the great Highlands. Would ye leave with me to Gretna Green to marry ov’r an blacksmith’s iron?” I would say yes in a heart beat. A HEARTBEAT YOU HEAR?!

~have you tried something new this year?~

um, I dressed myself in a kimono for the first time by myself. That was stupid hard. Also, I did a bang up job if I do say so myself (after the fourth attempt).

~what plans or wishes do you have for next year?~

Let’s see, I am the best man at my best friend’s wedding in May, so I got that going. Also, in September, I’ll be going to Japan to visit my sister who is working as an English teacher, so I got that to look forward too. I would love to find some time to myself so I can try and finish my college degree that I started back in 2009. Cross your fingers. Also, I would like to complete this book I’m writing for myself. I would really like that. Oh, and finally, sleep more. Yeah, sleep. Good thing that is.

~what was the funniest moment?~

Serious, I teach kiddos karate at my church. I have no shortage of amazing moments in my life. Also I have three godsons and a goddaughter, stories are made every weekend. But I can tell you one of my favorites.

So, I’m teaching this not-yet-seven-year-old an introductory class to karate. I’m explaining to him that not only does yelling scare the bad guys away, but it tells the teacher that you are breathing. So I asked him playfully, “Do you like to breath?” And he stops all motion and looks at me. Then he shrugs and says “not really.” Needless to say, I too stop to stare at him, stunned by a response that I had NEVER received in my 13+ years of teaching children karate. So, I logically asked why not. This tiny little american-latino child that comes up to my waist tells me with the straightest face I have ever seen “Cause it take a lot of work to breath and I don’t know if I have the time for that.” (#mood much?) I’m losing my mind trying to hold in my laughter. Thus I spend the next few minutes with a 6 year-old having a philosophical discussion about the pros and cons of breathing. Eventually, we agree that blue is an ugly color on people’s face and we cannot do karate in our sleep so he had to stay awake and moving instead of passed out on the floor due to the lack of air in his body. Once that was establish, I asked another instructor to take over because I simply had to find a corner to sit in as I collected my laughing ass off the floor.

I will forever remember this child as the boy that I had to convince that breathing was a good thing and made me almost piss my pants in the middle of karate class. TWICE because that little stinker had to randomly blurt out in the middle of a different class weeks later that we were wrong because blue was a flattering shade on dead people and we should not be racist to dead people.

I will now kindly remind you that this boy is 7 YEARS OLD.

~what are you thankful for?~

I am thankful for family and friends. I am also thankful to @saijspellhart. In my desire to let her know that she is not alone, I am finding the courage to become more open with myself and other around me. So thank you. I hope that this year will be a rebirth for both of us and tons of smiles for everyone that reads this.

As for tagging other Tumblr users, I am too damn shy for that. Instead, if you are reading this and want to do this, tag me! I would love to get to know you and your likes. It’s nice to see the humanity on this site. Thank you for getting to the end and I hope to get to know you too!

#text #long post #end of year #hopelessstargazer get to know #well this happen #this was fun #blog #ask blog

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kickeddownthestairs · 3 years

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Lawyers and suicide

It’s only Day 11 of 2021 and I’ve already lost count of the number of times I’ve thought about killing myself. Like, just super caj--not really serious--intrusive thoughts--type of suicidal ideation. And up until recently, I thought that surely I would never actually kill myself and that such fanciful thoughts should be beaten down. Because surely, a woman who lives warm and happy, safe and fed and loved and employed in the middle of a pandemic (and the Second American Civil War) is fortunate indeed. But I’m starting to think differently. I am warm but not happy, safe but unsafe, loved yes but I no longer love myself. Employed yes. But--

I had a dream last night of what must have been 15-story waves crashing over me while I cowered in the stairwell of a parking structure. Over and over again. I eat and play games and fuck and laugh but as soon as that’s over, I feel nothing again. Some days I log into my work computer, pull up the work that needs doing then turn away and just watch the news or browse Reddit all day (or write purple prose-y whiny tumblr posts). The work is stacked. And it’s all COVID all day long every day, that’s all I’m being paid to do or think about. At least the Second Civil War gives me something else to think about.

This profession is isolating and combative by nature. Not only that, but the more you accomplish, the more you tell people you can handle it, the more they will pile it on. And they are guaranteed to pile on more and more and more until you fucking quit or die. The Bar sent out a flyer with articles about lawyer burnout/depression this month and it’s pretty on point with the symptoms but not with the cause of the problem. The problem is with the society that the law purports to serve. Lawyers cannot diagnose or treat the societal ills that plague us. If I see another law job posting seeking “problem solvers” I will fucking drive my car into the river. If I hear another ball-licking Bar Association talk about how THE LAW has ever helped the poor I will bash my own skull in with a meat tenderizer. Malcolm Feeley wrote “the process is the punishment;” abso-fucking-lutely. Every part of the criminal and civil legal process is a punishment, is a failure of dispute resolution, is an ugly parade of all your dirty laundry before an indifferent jury of peers who HATE YOU.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this and there’s no call to arms at the end of the page. I think only a warning to any lookie-loo or similarly situated sad sack that might come across this post: just because you are living well and “lucky” by the standards of our profession doesn’t mean that you are okay. I am not okay. And you might have to acknowledge that you are also NOT OKAY. So just say no. Get the FUCK out (I know, I wish it were so easy, right?). And if you can’t get the fuck out then at least take some time for yourself and tell them all to fuck off. The world isn’t going to collapse if I don’t answer the fucking email--it’s just not. And hey--if Ted Cruz can be successful in this profession and still star in Jurassic Park III as the steaming pile of Spinosaurus shit that he is, then there really is no helping lawyers, is there.

#LAWBLR #real lawblr #law school #don't go to law school #don't kill yourself #suicide is bad #and you should feel bad #1L #2L #3LOL

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moneyscotch · 4 years

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Brian May | Top 10 Most Liked Pictures on Instagram

Top Most Liked Pictures of Brian May on Instagram.Most Loved and Most Commented Pictures of Brian May on Instagram.Most Loved Pictures of Brian May on Instagram.Brian May's has more than 2 Million Followers Top Pictures has more than One Million Likes

View this post on Instagram Thanks King Rami - you are IT !!! I’m still in shock at walking away with the two top awards of the night. THANK YOU Golden Globes ! BRI A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Jan 7, 2019 at 3:14am PST

View this post on Instagram I’m done ! After a snip to my calf muscle, I’m feeling good ! The theory is that it will release the excess tension in my Achilles’ tendon and get me out of a painful heel situation I’ve been in for many months. I had the problem all through our last tour of the USA - and although adrenaline got me through, my running around was severely curtailed, and there were a couple of nights when I really couldn’t move at all around the stage (nobody noticed, it seems ! 😏). So now I’ll be taking it easy just a bit for a while, but full recovery should be just in time for getting back out on tour in January - hopefully with a good pair of heels ! THANKS for your good wishes, folks. No cause for alarm. Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Dec 2, 2019 at 11:44am PST

View this post on Instagram I had to find the spot where that lovely old group photo was taken. We did ! It’s at Royal and Toulouse, in New Orleans French Quarter - and although a few things have changed, a lot of the ancient features are still there. The lamp post has been extended upwards - presumably to accommodate that less-than-pretty piece of ‘No Right Turn’ signage - and I seem to have lost my mates ! But ... well, it was a nice feeling to get back there. Now ... how about those other memories. ! Where’s Peaches ?!! Aaaah ... it’s 2019. How did that happen ..? 💥💥💥💥 BIG THANKS to my dear friend Kimberley Barsana for sending me this great antique pic and starting a nice quest ! And thanks to Liam Wheatley who took my picture here, and Zoe Smith who led the search party ! The chap in the background in the picture from 1980 is Walter Versen - who was, for a number of years, my security guard and friend in those days. We are still pals. 💥💥💥💥 And, by the way, if you’re interested in this stuff, there are lots more vintage pictures and stories in my book —— QUEEN in 3-D. Cheers - Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Aug 19, 2019 at 2:14pm PDT

View this post on Instagram Lovely !! Thanks ! Happy to be considered Memeworthy. But you haven’t seen me trying to get out of bed in the morning !!! Ha ha ! Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Nov 25, 2019 at 7:02pm PST

View this post on Instagram We’ve enjoyed spending the day with this little boy in our minds. A small boy with big dreams. A young man who became a brother to Roger and John and me for 22 years. A shy boy with whom we shared an impossible vision of making music that would change the world. Little did we dare to believe it would actually happen. I’m happy that through Instagram I’ve been able to share some of the experiences of today. I’ll post some more pics and stuff when I get sorted. Meanwhile ... Asante Sana Freddie. Cheers folks. And thanks @freddiemercuryb for this lovely pic I don’t recall seeing before. Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Jun 11, 2019 at 9:28am PDT

View this post on Instagram I want you to know that I regard this as the crowning moment of my career ! Thank you Funko ! Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Mar 21, 2019 at 7:43pm PDT

View this post on Instagram Who needs light ? Who needs focus ? It’s a moment ! I can deconvolve it later ... ! With King Rami, my buddy, at the Vanity Fiat salubrious Bash tonight in Beverley Hills. How glam are we ?!!! Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Feb 22, 2019 at 9:14pm PST

View this post on Instagram Great movies on this plane ! 😊 “Bohemian Rhapsody”, eh ?! I had to take a look at it - to check out how much our movie had been ‘expurgated’ for showing on Oman Air. Yep - they sure hacked away it - no kissing, no ‘bollocks’, and Freddie wasn’t even allowed to quite get to the point of ‘confessing’ to Mary - though it was pretty clear what the scene was about. By the end I really did feel that a lot of the film’s message was lost. Which made me sad. But then again, a lot of the good stuff DID come across even in this version. And - you know - it’s easy to get all superior and disapproving about this stuff - but it wasn’t so long ago that The Rolling Stones were only allowed to perform on the USA’s Ed Sullivan Show if they changed “Let’s Spend the Night Together” to “Let’s Spend Some Time Together” !! Don’t believe me ? Check it out on YouTube ! Maybe we’re not so liberal and progressive as we think we are ! Or maybe, for every nation, it takes time and tolerance and ... compromise ? To get to a good place. One of the things I’ve learned from animal campaigning is that shouting doesn’t always get you what you want. Bri 💥💥💥💥Thanks folks - I’ve enjoyed reading your comments. I don’t usually have time - but today I’m a captive audience and - I’ve learned a thing or two from this. Take care out there. We SHALL overcome. Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Jun 12, 2019 at 6:49pm PDT

View this post on Instagram Freddie lives !!! Tom MacKenzie - sculptor - and myself, with an amazing bust of Freddie which Tom and his son Grant have created using a mixture of 3-D digital modelling and traditional sculpting skills. They kindly presented this today and will donate this priceless treasure to the Queen Studio Experience exhibition in Montreux, to be enjoyed by all who visit. Amazing ! Big Thanks guys !! Bri — photo: Sara Bricusse A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Apr 16, 2019 at 7:42am PDT

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10.

View this post on Instagram This clip is stolen from @bryanjaysinger, who was evidently filming it on his iPhone. When the BR team were shooting this scene, I happened to be around, so Gwil invited me to have a go ! How did I do, folks ? Well, obviously not quite as good as Gwil ! He’s a trained artist ! 😊 We had too much fun ! I’d like to see the rest of what happened, captured by the film cameras which were still rolling ... some day. In case you’re wondering why this solo doesn’t sound like the ‘out-take’ solo in the film, I only had the idea to make that happen later, when we were polishing the soundtrack. In any case, we wouldn’t have had the facilities to do that on the day of the shoot. In the film, you hear a variant take on the Bo Rhap solo which just MIGHT have been the one previous to the final one which made it onto the record! Might ! That’s if it hadn’t been a genius first-take keeper. Ha ha ! I honestly don’t remember ! A million thanks to @mrgwilymlee Bri A post shared by Brian Harold May (@brianmayforreal) on Jan 14, 2019 at 2:28pm PST

Top Comments

All these years....And his hair hasn’t changed...;-;."

I wish he would give a TED talk one day about music and universe, and become THE icon for the enlightenment of new generation."

Don't forget that Brian May is an Astrophysicist in addition to being the great guitarist from Queen."

If brian may was my science teacher, and math teacher her then i would actually understand those subjects."

I really love May. He is so well spoken, so gentle, so intelligent and such a sweet guy. Brian May is more than a talented musician, he is a great mind and most importantly, a gentle soul.💜"

Brian may is a gentleman humble honest and generous with his time. ...we as men could all learn a thing or two from him."

I loved al 4 of them. They did well and still do. Freddie will be missed forever but at least the band kept him alive in everyone’s hearts along with themselfvess. Ill never stop listening to Queen." Read the full article

#BrianMay #BrianMay-QueenSongs #BrianMayBirthdayandHis10MostLikedPicturesonInstagram #BrianMayFamilyPictures #BrianMayImages #BrianMayLatestNews #TopInstagramPostsofBrianMay

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ask-the-phan-site · 5 years

Text

Phan Cam: To the sewers

WARNING: This post may be a bit long.

>Once again in the city of New York. But something seems... Different about it. Guess it’s because we’re about to see this city in a whole new light. Waiting at Grand Central Station in the early hours of the morning, our Horizon friends finally show up.

Hey, guys! Been waiting long?

We just got here early. Don’t worry.

That’s good to hear. I was in the middle of a suit fitting.

You actually look good in it, Harry. Mature even.

Harry: Thanks. If I’m going to be the head of Oscorp, might as well look the part. Actually, I could get my tailor to make you one, too, Ryuji. I know it will be a late birthday present, but I promise... You’re gonna love the way you look.

Skull: Thanks, but I think I’ll stick with my idol suit and the one ATLUS for now. But I’m sure I’ll take that offer.

Harry: Alright, I’ll look forward to it.

Me, too.

Peter: By the way, where is Akechi?

Joker: He’s on a case at the moment. But I’m sure you’ll see him again on the last week of your vacation.

Peter: I see. I can’t wait for it.

Now about this Hun person.

We have him at Horizon now.

Then lead the way. By the way, I’m Kasumi Yoshizawa.

Yeah, they told us. You’re the newest member.

Royal: Just remember, I’m with the P Thieves for my own reasons rather than changing the hearts of adults.

I guess that is kind of true.

Gwen: Wait... Morgana!?

Anya: (also shocked) It really is you.

See, we told you.

Gwen: But how?

Joker: ...

It’s a long story.

Gwen: Right.

>With that, we leave.

>We arrive at Horizon High. When we get there, we see the students of E. Nigma we interviewed are also here.

That seminar with Doc Greene was fantastic.

The man may seem eccentric, but a genius none the less.

If only Beth could have seen it.

Uhh!

(translating skater slang) You should have recorded it on your phone, bro.

We did.

Think you can make two copies. The rest of the Dudes are trying to get us ready to meet Ross Caliban.

Ted: Got you covered, Cy!

I still think it’s a bad idea that we ditched Kimmie.

True. This means the next time she sees us, she’ll totally destroy us, but anything’s worth it for science, I guess.

(who overheard them) Don’t worry, if she does... I’ll pour sand in her pants.

Druscilla: That’s a little gross, but thanks.

>With that, the students leave and we come in.

Flint: Ren san, you’re here!

Joker: Good to see you again, Flint. How are things?

Flint: Really good. I heard your friend is an idol now.

You bet. Want an autograph?

Flint: Let’s not get crazy. I guess you’re here to see Hun. He’s in the lab with Aleksei. Thinking who better to watch a mutated person than someone who was mutated themselves.

I wonder what kind of mutation happened? Was he also a victim of the Spider Island Incident?

Anya: No. He was mutated before it happened. He’s not even a spider.

Then what?

Gwen: More... Reptilian.

>We follow the others to the lab. There, Aleksei and Max Modell were standing before the same glass cell Aleksei was in when he was the Rhino.

Come on, Hun. You have to eat something.

He’s right. I made Katsudon Pirozhki. This is the stuff Yuri Plizetsky and Yuuri Katsuki ate. It’s quite popular.

>The creature in the cell, which I guess is Hun, turns to face us.

...

>He looks down at what Aleksei is offering him.

>Hun just stares at it. Slowly, he reaches for the pirozhki and... quickly snatches it and quickly eats it.

Aleksei: (victorious) See~? It’s good.

Hun: ... Shut up. Unless it can change me back.

Max: Only if you let us help you.

Hun: Never! Not until I have my revenge!

Max: Against who?

Hun: I told you already, you wouldn’t believe me, so I won’t tell you!

Max: (groans in defeat) Fine. We’ll try this again tomorrow.

>Hun goes back to his corner in the cell. Max and Aleksei turn to see us.

Max: (surprised) Oh, it’s you guys again. Welcome back.

It’s good to see you again, Max.

Max: I guess you’re here because of Hun back there.

Queen: Pretty much. How are things?

Max: Not good. No matter what we try, he just won’t let us help him. We have the way to cure his mutation.

Aleksei: Thanks to Dr. Octavius.

You shouldn’t believe everything he says, Aleksei.

Yeah, there’s no telling what could happen.

?????? ?????: Now that just sounds a bit hurtful.

Oh shit, he heard us!

>We quickly turn to see...

Skull: Oh, I thought...

I know very well who you thought I was. It is a common mistake. He used his own voice to create mine.

Max: Everyone, meet the Living Brain. Starting this school year, he will be taking over Otto’s class.

Queen: Really? Why?

Living Brain: Doctor Otto Octavius had already explained this in a video message he recorded before departing.

>The Living Brain then projects some kind of message of Otto Octavius, aka Doctor Octopus.

Hello, Max and Horizon High. I have created the Living Brain to take my place in the teaching staff this year and very well every other year. I have been thinking much of all the things I have done as the villain, Doctor Octopus. I now realize that there is a darkness inside me that I alone must face. Maybe because I am still grieving over the loss of Rosalie Murphy, my... Rosie... Maybe because the Phantom Thieves made me realize what I was doing to my students was wrong and offensive. Though I still ended up a villain. But now I realize the truth. Especially after getting the mental treatment I needed at the Cellar. Now all that is left for me to do is to go search for myself. To find out where I stand in this world. So until I find that answer, I have created the Living Brain to fill in for me. Also joining it, or him as I wish for him to be pronounced as, is a fellow inmate of the Cellar, Carolyn Trainer. She will look after the Living Brain and he will look after my class. Well, farewell. Let us hope we meet again in the future.

>With that, the message ends.

???????: Oh, no matter how many times I see that, it always brings a tear to my eye.

>We quickly turn to see a young woman with mechanical arms had entered the room.

Are... Are you Carolyn Trainer?

You see any other beautiful young woman with metal tentacles?

Panther: I guess not.

Carolyn: Glad to see we’re on the same page. We just came to see how the patient is doing.

Aleksei: Well, he’s eating the food we give him, so I don’t think we have to worry about him starving.

Carolyn: I’m glad to hear it. But you know, he won’t get any better if he doesn’t come out of his shell... Get it? Because he’s a turtle and he has a shell? And we’re asking him to get out of his shell?

>Hun clearly didn’t like the joke.

Hun: I! Hate! TURTLES!

>Hun charges at the glass and begins bashing on it. It doesn’t break, but it won’t hold forever.

Max: (shocked) This can’t be good.

Peter: I’m on it.

>Peter quickly shoots his web shooter at a nearby button. When it is pressed, a gas is released into the cell and Hun quickly calms down. Then, he falls to the ground... He’s fast asleep.

Max: Thank God and Anya for the sleep gas.

Anya: It’s no problem.

Carolyn: (acting all innocent) I’m sorry, I should have been more careful of what I say.

Seriously!? We could have been killed!

Yeah, what the hell is your malfunction!?

You... Are so lucky that you are giving me too many artistic ideas to scold you.

Peter: Hey, lay off, her you guys. She just didn’t know.

Queen: (groans) Fine.

Carolyn: Thank you... By the way, am I really giving you artistic ideas?

Fox: With those tentacles, it’s hard not to imagine. Something like that I would love to feature in my next art piece.

Diego: Are you going to have her strip?

Carolyn: (unimpressed) If you want me to pose for a nude portrait, I’m calling my lawyer.

Fox: I think an evening gown will suffice. (turns to me)

I already have my perfect nude model.

I’m glad to hear it.

Max: Anyways, that seems to be our only clue to Hun’s mental state. Whatever it is, it’s linked to turtles. That’s why seeing you here, I hoped that I could ask Akechi for help. If anyone might solve this mystery, it’s the Detective Prince. But since I see he’s not here... I just hope the other detective I hired can help.

Queen: Another detective?

Max: Well, she said that when she’s not being a superhero, she an investigative journalist. And when she learned that this case has something to do with turtles, she gladly accepted... She said she knows a thing or two about turtles since she dates one.

A superherorine that dates a turtle? That sounds like...

Max: Anyway, they’re suppose to be here soon. As soon as we can figure out what it means, maybe you guys can do your thing and that will make this job easier a little.

Queen: I guess we’ll do what we can.

Carolyn: What thing?

Max: Never you mind, Carolyn. Now I think we should let Hun rest.

>Just as we were leaving, the Living Brain stops.

Living Brain: There is sand on the floor.

>We look on the floor. There was a trail of sand coming from Flint.

Flint: (embarrassed) Sorry. I’ll clean it up.

Living Brain: No need for that. I shall clean it.

>The Living Brain sticks a vacuum out of his hand and sucks it up. Then, he gives the sand to Flint.

Flint: Thank you.

Living Brain: It was my pleasure. It must be very difficult... Sandman.

Flint: (looking down) ...

>With that, the Living Brain and Carolyn leave. We leave for an empty classroom while Max goes off to his office.

Joker: You know, when you told me things were really good...

You weren’t telling the whole truth, were you?

Flint: (sighs sadly) You’re right. It’s just... Lately, it getting harder and harder to maintain a human form. I can only guess it’s because I’ve been using my powers a lot. And that scares me a bit. It means that one of these days, the next time I turn to sand... I may not change back to human form... I’m coming apart, you guys... I’m dying.

No...

Gwen: But that may not have to happen. If we can see that we can cure Hun the same way Aleksei was cured, we might be able to cure you, too.

Flint: I hope you’re right, Gwen... Maybe they’ll do the same with Keemia.

Peter: We won’t know until we can cure Hun first. Then we’ll see if it works with you.

Flint: ... Thanks, you guys. I won’t lose hope yet.

>With that, Flint leaves.

Noir: Poor Flint. If only we can hurry up and see if Otto Octavius’s machine works on Hun, then we can use it on him.

Anya: Unless we can get Hun to just calm down, we might actually do it. But unless we can learn anything about these turtles he keeps talking about, there’s not much we can do.

Queen: I know there’s another detective coming, but I don’t think we should wait any longer. We’ll have to solve this mystery ourselves for now.

Skull: But where do we even start?

Miles: ... Actually, I think I know.

Harry: You know something, Miles?

Miles: Hun is, or was, the leader of a street gang known as the Purple Dragons... And I met someone who might know more about Hun and the Purple Dragons than anyone else.

Peter: Who is that?

Miles: ... Casey Jones.

>Flashback.

>Miles, as Spider Kid, swung to an empty apartment where someone he knew once lived.

Miles’s voice: Pete, do you remember that guy you fought, Prowler?

Peter’s voice: Hobie Brown? Yes.

Miles’s voice: Well... He’s not the first Prowler. Before him, there was another... My uncle, Aaron Davis... He’s dead now.

Peter’s voice: He is!? How?

Miles’s voice: It was during that time you were helping the Guardians of the Galaxy and the Phantom Thieves were Dancing in Starlight. My uncle was hired.

Gwen’s voice: Hired to do what?

Miles’s voice: ... To kill me... Or at least, Spider Kid. But he failed and was killed in an accident involving a rouge Inhuman who tragically ended his own life saying it was to avoid punishment.

Gwen’s voice: I see. I’m sorry for that Inhuman. And who would hire your uncle to kill you?

Miles’s voice: I don’t know. But that’s why I went to his apartment. To find out.

>Spider Kid opens the window and goes inside. So many memories of the time he spent with his uncle flooded into him. Then, he goes over to the computer.

Computer: Please enter your password.

... Sunflower.

Computer: Welcome back, Aaron.

>Spider Kid then searches the computer. It turns out Aaron did a number of jobs of criminals. After searching, he found the file that contains the information about Aaron’s task to end Spider Kid’s life... His nephew’s life. He managed to find the form that should contain the name of whoever hired Aaron. Unfortunately, it just says “Kingpin”.

Spider Kid: Kingpin? Who is he, Uncle Aaron?

>Spider Kid looks at the form again and he finds something.

Was I recommended to you?: Yes

If I was recommended to you, who did so? (Rest assured that this will not effect you or the party that recommended me.): Sid Jones of the Purple Dragons

Spider Kid: Sid Jones? Purple Dragons? I think I’ve heard about them from Dad.

>Later after that, Spider Kid swings to the place where the Purple Dragon Gang most likely reside in.

Miles’s voice: According to Dad’s police reports, the Purple Dragons often hang out in the back alleys of Manhattan. I searched everyone of them until I found the one where Sid Jones most likely is. I knew which one... Because some men in black were there.

>Some men in black suits where at the door of the hideout and busted in. Spider Kid quietly came in through in open window and saw what transpired.

Now wait a minute, I’m sure we can work something out!

Man 1: Your assassin failed and died on us, Jones. The Kingpin is not happy.

Man 2: And now he would like to have a few words with you.

Man 3: So we would be so happy if you could come with us.

Sid Jones: A little help here!

Alright, but you owe us big time, Jones. Purple Dragons, attack!

>A fight then broke out between the Purple Dragons and the men in black. However, the men in black seems to have superior technology that they used to easily beat the Purple Dragons.

Spider Kid: That doesn’t look good. Hey, creeps! You missed one!

>Spider Kid then drops to the floor between the men and Sid Jones.

Man 1: Spider Kid! Fine, if Prowler couldn’t finish you off, we’ll have to do it.

>Spider Kid engages with the men. Thwipping his web shooters and punching a kicking them. But there’s too many of them to handle.

Spider Kid: Shit. I’m almost out of webbing. Maybe coming here alone wasn’t such a good idea.

>This looked like the end of the young hero, until... Someone leaped in and attacked the men.

?????: GOONGALA!

>The new fighter comes and swings, what is unmistakably, a hockey stick at the men, knocking them down one by one.

Sid Jones: You!? Why are you here?

What’s a look like? I’m here to save your sorry ass and take you home. Ma’s worried sick about you... But if you rather have Arachnid Boy here...

Spider Kid: (quickly) No, no! I could use the assistance.

Masked man: That’s all I needed to hear. Goongala!

>Spider Kid and the masked man both fight off the men together. Before they knew it, the battle was over and the men in black flee.

(taking off his mask) Boy, is Raph gonna be ticked off that he missed this.

Sid Jones: Thanks, Casey. You’re my favorite cousin.

Casey Jones: I’m you’re only cousin.

Spider Kid: (a bit surprised) They’re cousins, huh?

>The two cousins just look to Spider Kid. None of them knew what to say.

>Back in the present.

Miles: The next night. I met Casey again. He’s been fighting the Purple Dragons for a long time. Right now, Cousin Sid is staying with Casey’s mom in the country to lay low until things have cooled down. He promised that soon I’ll get to talk to him and find out who Kingpin is.

Peter: I hope you do, Miles.

So do I.

Miles: But right now, if anyone knows more about Hun and the meaning of his talk of turtles, other than the fact he’s been mutated into one, he might.

Anya: Where can we find him?

Miles: Most nights, he and his wife, April O'Neil, go out into the city and to some old reservoir station in Central Park. I think they might go there again tonight... But they’ll be having company this time from the Web Warriors.

Peter: No doubt.

Harry: If this is to be my last job as Steal Spider for a while, might as well do this.

Joker: I’d like to come, too. You might need my help.

Fox: And me.

Skull: Yer gonna need a runner, too.

Queen: And a martial artist.

Peter: Alright.

Diego: The rest of us will stay here and keep and eye on Hun and maybe gather more information.

Right. Let’s do it.

>With that, we split for now... Panther and Gwen, however, stay behind.

Panther: Gwen... Are you thinking...

Gwen: ... I might.

Panther: I know you’ve been hanging around them for awhile. Doing so, you...

Gwen: That’s possible.

Panther: Do... Do Anya and the others know?

Gwen: Well, Anya does. The guys don’t know anything.

Panther: I see...

Good luck and be careful.

Gwen: (smiling) I will.

>Up in the dorms, me, Fox, Skull, Queen, Peter, Harry, Miles, and Anya were getting ready to go out.

How do I look? I have to thank Mitsuru san for giving these to us the last time we met.

You look wonderful, Ren.

I still wish I could be wearing the other hero suit. That one has a visor that can hide my face. But this is good, too.

I know. Guess I may not have to take you to my tailor after all... But I still want to and going to anyway.

Ah, thanks!

Shh! Everyone may know that Peter and Harry are, but Miles, Anya, and us are still unknown.

Stealth Spider: Sorry.

It’s okay. It can happen to anyone. So, is everyone set?

We’re ready to go, anytime.

Spider-Man: Alright then, let’s get to it.

Everyone: Right!

>With that, we leave... However, someone was watching.

????: Looks like things are getting interesting.

????: Pretty much.

?????: Guess it was a good thing we came.

?????: So what is your call?

????: We go after them, of course. They’re going to need our help.

????: Alright then, let’s go.

????: Trixx, Let’s Pounce!

????: Wayzz, Shell On!

>An abandoned reservoir station in Central Park. We got here in the dark of the night searching for Casey Jones and April O’Neil.

Stealth Spider: I don’t see them.

Spider Kid: They should be arriving right about... Now.

>Suddenly, we see two people coming from the woods. No doubt those are who we were waiting for.

Casey: I dunno. I still don’t like it.

I’m sure everything will be fine, Casey. Sid’s safe.

Casey: It’s just not that, April. Those guys at Horizon wanna turn Hun back into a human. Is that really the right thing to do?

April: I know Hun isn’t exactly our best friend, but even the guys think he doesn’t deserve that.

Casey: Mmm. I guess you’re right. But if Hun’s still the same guy he was before the mutation...

April: I know. You’ll get the hockey sticks.

>April then goes to some kind of control panel. I use my Third Eye and got a closer look at what she was pushing. Then, a secret door opens and they go in. After it closes, we come in.

Queen: What’s the code?

>I type it in. Then, the door opens.

Let’s do it.

>We go in... Someone quickly follows in.

Did you hear that?

Spider-Girl: Hear what?

Queen: ... It’s nothing. Probably just the wind. Let’s keep going.

>We keep going in.

????????: Phew. They almost heard us.

????? ??????: Let’s just be ghosts and go about this quietly until they need us.

???? ?????: Right.

>Thanks to Spider-Man and Stealth Spider, we now had a stealth mode to hide us from view. When we came in... We were dropping jaws.

What the eff is this?

Spider-Man: I don’t know. I swing through Central Park every night and I’ve never known about this.

>Suddenly, we heard talking coming from a nearby room. We decided to sneak in a peek... We were shocked to see who the couple were talking to.

Casey: I’m still not so sure, Master Splinter, I feel bad for Hun, but I don’t think they should cure him at all.

You are letting your past hatred cloud your sight. Even great warriors forgive their enemies when they have to.

Casey: I know. I just dunno what to do anymore. But least with him out of the way for now, we, includin' Spider Kid, can learn more about this Kingpin Sid was talking about.

Master Splinter: (that is what we heard) I am sure you will.

April: By the way, where are the Turtles? Aren’t they still grounded for sneaking away to Gothem?

Master Splinter: They are... And our newest guests are about to meet them.

What!?

>Suddenly, something grabbed me by the wastes and threw me back. The stealth tech in my suit turns off... I’m shocked to see who... Or what did it.

Alright, pal, I dunno who you are or where you came from, and frankly, I don’t care. But you’re gonna regret comin’ in here without bein’ invited!

>I can sense that my friends want to help, but I gesture them to stay hidden... But not for long.

????????????: Whoa! Was that guy invisible? Are there more.

>To my surprise, two more ‘turtles’ came at my friends who were forced to become visible.

Amazing. I knew the Web Warriors were working on stealth technology, but to know that they can use it with others?

I know. How come you never made stuff like that for us, Donny?

(also coming in) Focus, Mikey, we have these guys to deal with.

Red Masked Turtle: Right. Let’s do this.

Fine, so be it!

>I ready myself. Good thing I remember my wrestling training with Bonesaw McGee and the hand-to-hand technique I learned at the gym. Also, Queen and Joe took time to teach me some aikido and boxing... But before I can make a move...

???? ?????: This doesn’t look good!

What!?

MIRAGE!

>A blinding light comes. Then, something pulled me away to the rest of my friends.

SHELL-TER!

>Something formed around us, but I can’t see what it is due to the light. Then, I hear webbing go around. Then finally, the light fades... The Turtles have been webbed up.

Queen: What happened? Did you do this?

Spider-Man: No. We’re here in this green dome for some reason.

It’s a sphere, actually.

Stealth Spider: I take it you two are the detective and turtle expert.

What gave it away? And by the way, I’m not a detective, I’m a reporter. An investigative reporter.

????? ??????: And I’m here, too.

Spider-Man: Wait... No, it can’t be...

Relax... It isn’t. Just another spider person who became inspired. Just call me Ghost Spider.

Spider-Girl: I think we should trust her. I’ve run into her dozens of times and she’s definitely not Gwen. Spider-Man, surely Ms. Marvel told you about her.

Spider-Man: Well, no. She didn’t say anything.

Ghost Spider: Then we’re good? Good.

?????? ???????: I am glad to see you are on good terms with each other... Now will you please release my sons?

>We saw Master Splinter, Casey, and April coming in.

Ghost Spider: Alright. Spider-Man? Stealth Spider? Spider Kid? Spider-Girl?

>Ghost Spider and the other Web Warriors free the Turtles from the prison. Then, Master Splinter begins to explain their story.

Master Splinter: And so, from a museum catalog I found in the sewer, I gave them all names.

Blue: I’m Leonardo. My friends call me Leo.

Purple: I’m Donatello. Donny or Don for short.

Orange: I’m Michelangelo. Or just Mikey.

Red: And I’m Raphael. But just call me Raph.

Fox: Naming your children after Renaissance master?

That’s quite sophisticated of you.

Master Splinter: ありがとうございました。

どういたしまして。

April: Anyways, what brings the Web Warriors, the Phantom Thieves, and two Parisian superheroes to New York?

Casey: Yeah, Cousin Sid is still hidin’ and ain’t ready to tell us about Kingpin.

Spider Kid: I know. But this is something completely unrelated.

Casey: What is it?

Well, you know we have Hun at Horizon High and we’re trying to find a way to change him back into a human.

Casey: I know. I still think you should let him stay that way. He deserves it.

Raph: Normally I’d agree with ya, Case, but doncha think that might be a bit too much?

Casey: I know. It’s just... I just don’t know what to feel right now.

Spider-Girl: I know what you’re feeling. Really, I do. But he’s still human. Surely you can show a little kindness when they really need it. I’m sure even you don’t want him to spend the rest of his life as a turtle... No offense.

Don: None taken.

Carapace: Same here.

(again, sorry for the chop job) So as we were saying, we want to cure him, but he’s having some problems... Up here. (tapping his head)

Peter: We think that his hatred of turtles, or more like you guys, is making it hard to change him back. That’s why the Phantom Thieves are here. It seems our only chance is social reform of him.

Joker: But in order to do that, we need to know more about him.

Spider Kid: And who knows more about Hun than the guy who’s been hunting him almost his whole life?

Casey: ... I guess that’s kinda true. Ever since the Purple Dragons burned down my dad’s shop when I was a kid, I’ve been huntin’ them. So imagine my shock when I learned my own cousin joined them because of a gamblin’ debt.

Spider Kid: Yeah, I can understand the feeling.

>Spider Kid was looking down.

Peter: Anyway, perhaps you can help us with this. Can you?

Casey: I’ll see what I can do.

Thank you for your cooperation, Mr. Jones. Now what can you tell us about Hun?

Casey: Well, for starters, Mr. Jones is my father. Just call me Casey or Case. And second, Hun isn’t his actual name. Actually, it’s just part of it. His full name is Hunter. Hunter Mason. Currently, he should be 36. His birthday is April 20, 1983...

>Suddenly, we heard a beeping sound.

Rena Rouge: You think you can go on without us? That sound means we’re about to change back.

April: If you like, you can rest in the other room. Don’t worry, we won’t peek... Right, Michelangelo? (eyes him)

Mikey: (unhappy) Why am I being singled out?

Raph: Uh, because it’s you?

Mikey: ... Point taken.

Carapace: Thanks. By the way, we do have a request, though.

Master Splinter: What is it?

Carapace: Well... You happen to have any cookies, would you?

>We were a little confused, but Don gave him a box of cookies.

Carapace: Thanks, dude. Merci.

Don: De rien.

>With that, Carapace and Rena Rouge go into the next room. And then...

Is there a bathroom I can use?

Leo: We turtles don’t have to actually use the bathroom, but we do have one in case Casey and April have to use one. It’s just around the back.

Joker: Thanks.

>I leave for the spot Leo said... But I’m not really going to the bathroom. I use my Third Eye and I find what I’m really looking for... A hole in the wall. I quietly peek inside. It is the room Rena Rouge and Carapace are in.

Rena Rouge: Trixx, Let’s Rest.

Carapace: Wayzz, Shell Off.

>With that, the two heroes change back to their civilian forms as two little creatures come out of their jewelry, which I can only guess are their Miraculouses. Keep in mind, these characters are from a fanmade timeline that is much different from the main series. Also, names have been strike though to protect their identities from Hawk Moth.

Here you go.

Thank you. (takes the cookie) You know, I’m surprised that you’re not surprised by the fact that you are in the company of anthropomorphic turtles and a rat.

Hey, it’s New York. They’ve got superheroes, super villains, aliens, sorcerers, gargoyles, ghosts, Ghostbusters, dragons, other magical creatures, even a talking mouse that lives with a human family.

Girl with Glasses: And let’s not forget that time those Xiaolin monks visited.

Boy with Glasses: That’s true, Alya, but that was a long time ago to find some magic artifact.

Rena Rouge: That’s not true. They still visit here sometimes. Mostly because of that basketball playing kid that helped us find Horizon.

Carapace: Guess I can’t argue with that.

So it is no longer strange that there are teenage mutant ninja turtles and their rat father living here?

Crapace: True. But we’ll let them come out on their own. We can’t force them... BTW, for those reading this post, don’t go to New York looking for things we just said are here. They can only be found in this New York.

Wayzz: So what now? Should we help them?

Rena Rouge: Well, we heard about these Phantom Thieves from Ladybug and Cat Noir when they targeted Chloe. But they have done so much for everyone. Including here in New York. Twice. A bunch of times.

Wayzz: Yes. The Master told me about them as well.

Carapace: Well, right now, let’s just work with them. If they Web Warriors trust them and they want to help, might as well.

Rena Rouge: Right. It wasn’t easy trying to convince Ladybug to let us take the Miraculous with us to here. Might as well use them.

Carapace: Actually, I convinced her when I DJ the opening of Junes in Sternbild. Then again, she and Cat Noir were with me when I used it.

Rena Rouge: True. Anyway, Trixx, Wayzz, are you charged up?

Trixx: (finishing his cookie) Ready.

Wayzz: (also finishing his cookie) Same here.

Rena Rouge: Good. Let’s get to it. Trixx, Let’s Dash!

Carapace: Wayzz, Shell On!

>I got away from the hole quickly. I make my way back to the main lair. Queen comes to me.

Queen: Welcome back. While you were gone, we managed to learn more about Hun. I think the location of his Palace might be the Oroku Saki Tower. And I think I might know what the Palace is. We’ll go there soon after we tell the others.

Don’t worry, Splinter Sensei, I won’t say too much about you or your sons.

Master Splinter: Thank you, Queen san.

Joker: Right.

>Then, Rena Rouge and Carapace rejoin us. Then we leave back for Horizon High.

>Back at Horizon, after settling in the dorms, me and Fox decide to take a quick bath. When we get there, we find Peter, Harry, Aleksei, and (to my surprise) Carapace there.

WARNING: Some nudity ahead.

Carapace: (no nude picture at the request of his girlfriend) Hey there.

Ren, Yusuke, this is Nino Lahiffe. He and his girlfriend are visiting for a few days.

... A pleasure.

The more the merrier.

Glad to hear it.

>We got in.

Aleksei: I’m glad to see the dorms are still in good shape since my break.

Well, we knew someone had to look after it. So we took over for you until you came back. Even the adults helped out.

Peter: Miles’s dad got us a new TV for the lounge. Gwen’s dad got us a bigger fridge. Anya’s mom and some of her friends kept the baths clean. Even Randy’s dad put in stronger WiFi. Aunt May, Flash’s mom, and Liz’s parents put in a bulletin board for either volunteer work at F.E.A.S.T. or part time work at the Allens’ restaurant.

Aleksei: That’s good to hear. Thank you.

Peter: You’re welcome.

Joker: By the way, how are things with Aunt May?

Peter: Things are going well. At least it beats having to work for the Bugle. Now that’s I’m 18, Jameson can now legally say bad things about me.

Carapace: No need to worry about that, dude. If Alya can get in an interview about how there might be a chance you’ll team up with Ladybug, Cat Noir, and the rest of Team Miraculous, he might end up singing a different tune.

Peter: ... I’ll think about it. Thanks anyway though.

Carapace: Oh, you, Harry.

Harry: Yes?

Carapace: My boy’s dad told me to tell you that he’s looking forward to your next visit to Paris.

Harry: Very well. Tell Mr. Agreste that I’ll be looking forward to meeting him soon.

>Seeing us all together like this. It just makes times like this very good. I see that Peter and Harry are especially happy... Then I think about the Living Brain. I just hope things will hold and that never happens.

>We will be going on our heist soon.

#phantom thieves cam

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gossipgirl2019-blog · 6 years

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Is Selena Gomez Okay?

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Is Selena Gomez Okay?

Welcome to You Know What I Heard, the Cut’s weekly celebrity gossip column about the peregrinations of the rich and famous.

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Over the weekend, Justin Bieber proposed to one of his on-again, off-again girlfriends, Hailey Baldwin. The couple confirmed the engagement on social media yesterday: Baldwin expressed her “gratitude” in a tweet and Bieber expounded on his Christian faith, which he believes brought him to Baldwin, in a 245-word Instagram caption which you should read:

So, they are getting married. Or intend to get married. What about Selena Gomez?

Bieber and Gomez got back together for a third or fourth time in late 2017 and broke up again around March of this year. Bieber and Baldwin reportedly started up again around a month ago, and now they’re engaged. According to People, Gomez is fine!

“She hasn’t been thinking about Justin,” a source told the tabloid this morning. “She’s in a great place and is very happy.”

E! News talked to several sources yesterday who also said Gomez is fine. “Selena was surprised an engagement happened this quickly but not surprised Justin would do something like this knowing who he is. At the end of the day though she doesn’t really care,” one said. Another added: “Selena knows that Justin makes rash decisions, but wishes them both the best.” Hehe.

Gomez was photographed in New York this morning smiling and wearing new hair extensions. That’s what I would do, too: get new hair extensions. It seems like a positive move, and I believe Gomez will persevere. But what happens when they all show up to Hillsong together?

Another fun surprise from this week: David Foster, 68, proposed to Katharine McPhee, 34. According to McPhee, it happened in Italy, and it was really romantic:

This will be McPhee’s second marriage and Foster’s fifth. She is not interested in hearing any opinions you might have about that.

y’all should be worrying more about registering to vote and midterm elections than who’s marrying me. thank you for coming to my TED talk.

— Kat McPhee (@katharinemcphee) July 6, 2018

According to Us Weekly, McPhee and Foster want to get married soon, so that they can have children. “David says that Katharine is his true love and muse,” a source told the tabloid. “They do want to have a family.”

Foster has five daughters and multiple stepchildren from his previous relationships, some of whom are older than McPhee. His kids seem to have a sense of humor about it all, however:

That photo is from Foster’s last wedding to Yolanda Hadid, mother of Gigi, Bella, and Anwar Hadid. Brody and Brandon Jenner were there, as Foster was previously married to their mother Linda Thompson. Will everyone show up for wedding number five?

One small blessing from this week:

Tiffany Trump is “on the party circuit.”

And here’s an interesting blind item from this week, care of Enty at Crazy Days and Nights:

“There is a buzz going on right now that the reason this A+ list singer left certain dates open in her tour later this month is to finally spend some time with her alliterate former bff prior to a big life event for the former bff. This is supposed to be a three day bash, so we shall see if they finally break bread together and do other things we want them to do together.”

Kaylor returns?

Finally, I’d like to take a moment to check in with an iconic figure from gossip past. Justin Bieber has dated several bikini models over the years, but now that he is almost officially off the market, it’s time to remember one of them: Bronte Blampied.

Bieber took up with Blampied in the summer of 2016. They went to clubs together and wore swimsuits together and ate acai bowls together. What’s Blampied up to now?

More of the same, it seems.

Thanks so much for gossiping this week. Don’t forget to email me at [email protected], send me a message on Twitter, or contact me on Signal, if you’d like to chat.

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getyourgossip0-blog · 6 years

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Is Selena Gomez Okay?

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Is Selena Gomez Okay?

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So, they are getting married. Or intend to get married. What about Selena Gomez?

“She hasn’t been thinking about Justin,” a source told the tabloid this morning. “She’s in a great place and is very happy.”

Another fun surprise from this week: David Foster, 68, proposed to Katharine McPhee, 34. According to McPhee, it happened in Italy, and it was really romantic:

This will be McPhee’s second marriage and Foster’s fifth. She is not interested in hearing any opinions you might have about that.

y’all should be worrying more about registering to vote and midterm elections than who’s marrying me. thank you for coming to my TED talk.

— Kat McPhee (@katharinemcphee) July 6, 2018

Foster has five daughters and multiple stepchildren from his previous relationships, some of whom are older than McPhee. His kids seem to have a sense of humor about it all, however:

One small blessing from this week:

Tiffany Trump is “on the party circuit.”

And here’s an interesting blind item from this week, care of Enty at Crazy Days and Nights:

Kaylor returns?

Bieber took up with Blampied in the summer of 2016. They went to clubs together and wore swimsuits together and ate acai bowls together. What’s Blampied up to now?

More of the same, it seems.

Thanks so much for gossiping this week. Don’t forget to email me at [email protected], send me a message on Twitter, or contact me on Signal, if you’d like to chat.

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vishers · 4 years

Text

Friday-ish Links

Conrad Barski (author of the classic Land of Lisp, a classic and enjoyable introduction to CL) apparently shares my opinion that all the great developers are obsessed with automation.

I'm starting to realize why great programmers are so obsessed with automating all the steps in their workflows: It's not for aesthetic reasons or to save time.

It's simply because it's hard work to keep remembering all the steps.

Hillel Wayne with a hit 2 weeks in a row. This one is applicable to so many domains but the ones I'm thinking of most directly are where you put your data validation rules and generative testing. The debate between making your database dumb and your app smart or your database smart and your app dumb is a hot one. I sit firmly in the smart DB camp. I feel like Hillel's insights here are something that I came upon myself when trying to get into generative testing with test.check. It's very natural to start with generating a bunch of data and then using predicates to filter it down but it's much more constructive (har har) to explictly build the data you're looking for in a given situation. I should really do that test.check talk.

Unfortunately I have nothing to link to because their apparently working on a polished version for their blog. Maybe you should just get off your butt and sign up for the newsletter. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My buddy Redmond is interested in promoting intellectual humility and wondered whether there was something that could be done technologically to foster it. We're batting some ideas back and forth but of course it made me think of Eli Pariser's classic filter bubbles TED talk. I'm intrigued to learn that more recent research has at least suggested that filter bubbles don't have the effect one would intuitively expect them to. Cognitive Biases may be too strong to overcome simply with presentation of new information.

De-Coding The Technical Interview Process

This book looks really interesting. With COVID making the rounds many of us may be working through the god-awful interview process our industry continues to foist upon us.

via Kevin Sherman via Angie Jones via Emma Bostian

emacs-lsp/lsp-mode: Emacs client/library for the Language Server Protocol

Looks very interesting. I don't want an IDE necessarily but I sometimes would like to use IDE features. On the other hand I'll never forget Kyle Burton's insight that IDE's actually support the development of overly complex systems by hiding so much of the complexity away inside of the IDE features (an insight that he attributed to Aaron Feng, IIRC). If I'm writing something that can't be effectively manipulated as text I think I have a problem.

via lsp-mode 6.3 released to MELPA stable : emacs

What is it about? - Community Center / Watercooler - ClojureVerse

I think this is kind of beautiful and a direct reminder of why I still love the Clojure and its community.

Re: Use readonly wherever possible?

This is the kind of discussion that keeps me around in help-bash. It's also the kind of discussion that keeps a lot of people away from bash. I don't think that's really fair. Every language, no matter how well designed, has pitfalls and gotchas that you need to be aware of and anti-patterns that are obvious in hindsight but invisible on the way in.

Hillel Wayne's How I Write Talks Newsletter got me thinking about just how much I love How to Speak How to Listen. One of the many things recommended in that book is a particularly unorthodox style of writing presentations down with extremely significant indentation and whitespace that greatly aids the speaker.

Last Week in AWS is a great way to keep up with developments from AWS. I was said to learn that Amazon continues to disprove it's quality in issue 160 which will eventually hit the archives I'm sure that Tim Bray has resigned in protest over Amazon's treatement of it's workers during this pandemic. That Prime membership is looking less and less appealing every day.

Complexity Has to Live Somewhere

This really hits home right now. People have a tendency to look at everything everyone else is doing and come to the snap conclusion that it's too complicated. This is the kind of community anti-pattern pointed out by Evan Czaplicki in The Hard Parts of Open Source where someone most likely fresh to the community or space takes 5 minutes to look at a problem and says to themselves, in the immortal words of a HISHE Dub, "That's dumb. You're dumb." and decides that they could do it in a much simpler manner. The problem is that most people are trying to implement the simplest system they can given the constraints they have and often much more complexity has been thrown at that system than is obvious at even third or fourth blush. What you're embarking down when you've decided that some system is obviously too complex and needs to simplified is a rewrite.

Reminds me of the classic on why you really should think at least 18 times if you're considering rewriting software. And if we're linking to Joel we might as well link to his excellent character encoding post which every developer everywhere should read and my personal favorite presentation of all time on the subject, How Do I Stop the Pain?.

The Open Group / DPBoK Community Edition · GitLab

Very intriguing. I need to read this more deeply.

Amazing streaming stuff

Twelve Shows Streaming Now | News | Great Performances | PBS

Royal Opera House

The Shows Must Go On! - YouTube

One more entry for why I hang around the grey beards (and secretly wish to become one). Peng Yu makes bash do things that most people would consider unnatural but sometimes they come up with quite a good question. I'm dead sure that I will encounter a behavioral problem in the future because of the apparent difference between logical and physical paths simply because I had the misfortune of reading this thread.

What is the difference between $PWD and pwd?

Re: What is the difference between $PWD and pwd?

git - Explain which gitignore rule is ignoring my file - Stack Overflow

Really? You added *jar to .gitignore rather than *.jar!?

Angie Jones t00ted that she was playing around with Java 14 Records (currently in preview). It got me thinking about how amazingly impressed I am by Java and it's stewardship over the years. Java's just sitting their calmly trucking along while languages flash around it day and day out and developers chasing their next high flit from one new thing to the next hoping to find that silver bullet that will unlock their 10x-developer potential. And while these new languages hang around for a bit and then generally die off because the next big thing comes out, Java gets to pick through the corpse, choose the juiciest parts, and incorporate them right into itself, all on top of the JVM which is still one of the most impressive pieces of technology I've ever seen. Java, like Python as much as it pains me to say, is a Dark Matter language. As much as I love Clojure I have trouble imagining a future where I'll be writing it for the rest of my life. I already don't write only or even mostly Clojure. But I will definitely be writing Java again in my career and it will be world's better than when I left it (Java 1.5 Generics FTW BAYBEEEE) for my own dream chasing.

via Payara on Twitter

My wife and I finally got to watch The Shape of Water. What a film. It drips with Pan's Labyrinth which obviously makes sense. I think as it's settled it's become a solid ★★★★☆. What a film he would've made had he actually been given the reigns for The Hobbit.

#friday-ish links

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