#I should probably go

[somanywords]

maggie stiefvater is coming within what I'm willing to drive on her graphic novel tour. do i buy the book and go see her

[sirhamburrger]

kai i know i already excitedly replied to your theme update post but like AQUARIUM AQUARIUM AQUARIUM AQUARIUM

i love when manta rays smoosh against the glass and go :]

AQUARIUM AQUARIUM AQUARIUM AQUARIUM

i think one of the employees has a crush on you… his name is watari i think?? >:)

[pure-garbage]

Not-So-Quick Thought Dump

I'm currently working on a handful of chapters that are actually incredibly important to me. I've been a victim of domestic abuse in the past, so it's an unbelievably difficult topic for me to write about. As much as writing can provide therapy and catharsis, I'm still only human and I get triggered sometimes trying to work through trauma I've personally experienced. I'm sure I'll end up hiding all the pain under a few layers of comedy, which is also fine. That's valid as an art form(I think).

That being said, I'm very pleased with the way I present the situation playing out roughly through chapters 123, likely to around 127. Character aspects like the ones explored here are a huge part of the reason I love the straw hat women so much, especially Robin(Lots of love for Nami too, but she is significantly younger and I head canon her as less experienced/wise).

Robin is the friend I always wanted but never had when I was dealing with my own struggles. She's centered, she's grounding, she's practical, and she can be amazingly fierce when it come to protecting/advocating for the people she cares about.

Going through my own experiences, I never had anyone who told me what I was going through was not okay. It can be incredibly confusing to be victimized by someone you have strong feelings for, whether that's romantic or familial. One of the hardest things in the world to realize is that two things can be true simultaneously: you can love someone and still not be okay with the way they treat you. You can create boundaries, have tough discussions and try to change behaviors. If change isn't possible, it becomes necessary to walk away, which is a separate challenge in and of itself.

Also the concept that someone can hurt you without meaning to and that's still not acceptable. It's easy to make excuses for the people who hurt us instead of holding them to account. Justifying the actions of someone you love is a hell of a lot easier than communicating with them. It's a lot easier than telling them you aren't okay with what they did. It's a lot easier than asking them not to do it again. Especially if they don't realize or don't want to admit that they hurt you. Maybe they were just playing. Maybe they thought you could handle it. If you're tempted to make excuses for them, you'd better believe that if you try to have a conversation about what happened, they'll likely make excuses for themselves.

This point cuts extra deep, at least for me, because it goes both ways. We can hurt the people around us without that being our intention. Hurting someone doesn't automatically make you the bad guy. Every fight in a relationship doesn't necessarily have a 'right' or 'wrong' side. It's fine to have a little self-forgiveness, but it has to be paired with caution. Don't make excuses for yourself instead of taking responsibility. The only thing you can really do to wrong another person is violate the boundaries they set knowing that you're doing so.

Whatever happened, even if it was a little thing, a petty thing, a 'stupid' thing: if you didn't like it, that's enough reason for it to never happen again. That's called setting a boundary and anyone who cares about you will respect the lines you draw in the sand and go out of their way not to cross those lines again. Which probably sounds super basic, like it should 'go without saying', but some of us were raised in dysfunctional households. For us, this really basic knowledge is a completely alien concept that we learn about later on. It's a life-changing epiphany if you're lucky enough to realize it consciously.

So if there's one lesson I can impart with this little arc, I hope that it is this: love and respect go hand in hand and they have to be mutual. Put the work in, be considerate, but don't forget to demand the same effort and consideration in return.

And walking away from a bad situation never makes you a bad person.

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[clyde-wy]

So the funniest shit ever just happened. I checked at the shop how many tickets were left for Mayhem's live in my country (🇲🇫), and it said i shit you not, "99+". Like ik black metal is the least popular metal genre but this is insane, the concert is in 3 days bro, nobody checked in🤣

[hunysckle]

in desperate need of a sleepy and gropey makeout sesh that ends with me face down ass up while you tease me about how easy it was to make me drip down my thighs

[extragalaxtic-cosmos]

!

[keferon]

Don’t mind me I just like to see him go bananas about cartoonish Autobot rules

Maaan…..if Prowl was in tfp he would spontaneously combust at least once a day

[paracosmicka]

have doodle lol

functionally, i am alive, emotionally?? idk about that work has me crying almost everyday now chat idk if i can do this anymore

[egophiliac]

(looks at upcoming card releases)

I'm in danger :)

[kaahmbem]

legend has it that the young witch circe and the once beautiful nymph scylla shared a complicated past...

[digitalglitch]

Chloesimagination ?? HELP I ACCIDENTALLY POSTED THIS TWICE--- OK SO something a little different! I really wanted to show my appreciation for @chloesimaginationthings for their contributions to the community! I wanted to also thank them for always sharing my art on Insta, it's super sweet and means a lot to me! I asked my Insta followers what I should draw for them sooo- here it is! I tried to reference some of my favorite comics they've made- So shout out to Chloe, go follow her! Though if you haven't idk why you're following me because we both draw human FNaF stuff?

Also- if you happen to see this Chloe for some reason, don't feel obligated to repost! I noticed you tend to repost fanart- I really just wanted to show my appreciation is all, so dw about it! Thanks again for your contributions to the fandom!(also sorry if I @ ed you twice it was an accident)

[itshirohi]

Guys it's his first day at the arena 😳😱

Look at this beautiful upcoming champion and his deadly rusty dagger.

[suja-janee]

I’ve been losing my mind over these guys recently

[spiralling-spires]

Being jurgen leitner the day that gerry almost killed him was probably really surreal. Imagine you’re minding your business, collecting fucked up books, and out of nowhere this goth guy covered in eye tattoos shows up and beats you half to death, then stops, goes, “no you’re too pathetic to be jurgen leitner” and leaves without further elaboration. And you dont correct him, you like being alive after all, and after that you just… continue with your life. And then several years later you tell this to some random guy in the tunnels you’ve been hiding in, and he not only knows who the goth was, but seems somewhat fond of the goth. And then you get brutal pipe murdered by the random guy’s boss. Oops

[slushyseals]

Run! Run little bird! The vacuum is coming for you!