I think a lot about internalized fatphobia. Like I know that I've been impacted by that sort of thing, and I've been working for ages to combat it, and sometimes I feel like I've made no progress bc I do still want to be thinner. But like whenever I stop and reflect on the why, it's always tied to like. My desire to find clothes. Like I'm not even fat. My body size and shape are pretty average for a fan person in their late 20s, but that means I'm just outside of the range for a lot of mainstream fashion brands. I'm just at that point where a lot of companies stop trying to make things fit you. And it sucks! It's so much less fun shopping for clothes when at least half of the things you think are cool don't fit people like you! And the thing is, I'm just on the cusp! I still can find things that fit me, even if it's harder. Idk man, I'm just really stuck on how much the fashion industry sucks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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"You can have sensory issues and still dress however you want!" yes true, some people with sensory issues may not have difficulties with certain fabrics as much as other sensory input which leads to being able to wear most anything they want. but not all people with sensory issue can just wear anything, I have a specific kind of fabric for pants and it has to also be a certain percent since most of the time it comes in mixes and if it isn'tthat or sweat pants i want to cry. I can't wear leggings, I can't wear jeans or just denim in general, I can't wear things that are too stiff or I'll feel like I'm trapped, I can't wear shirts that are too tight cause I'll feel trapped, I can't wear long sleeve shirts because they're often too tight, I can't wear low socks they have to be mid calf or higher, silk feel slimy, and most fabrics are too itchy. but yes uh huh i can still wear anything and this totally does not heavily restrict what I can wear (or at least what I can wear for very long). I can definitely dress in the emo style for a long time and be wear tight skinny jeans and tight shirts and too many belts.
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✨🎥! Forgot to say, I have a wedding in April but no dress/suit/clothes. I’m desperately looking but every single day I’m more disappointed in the quality of the fashion industry. Even the most basic thing is shit quality and cost 5 times what it should. So yeah, if anyone has recommendations on clothes (not necessarily for weddings or events, but in general) that are good quality, let me know
i know how you feel, affordable decent clothing is fucking impossible right now. honestly my best advice is thrifting/secondhand. idk what the situation for that is like in spain so maybe it's not possible, but it's always worth a shot, especially if you've already been looking for a while. it does obvs take more time than shopping new bc you have to sift through racks, but you're more likely to get a good find of better quality for a more reasonable price. my general thrifting advice (honestly this applies to any clothes shopping also) is first look for the colour and shape that you like, and then look at the material content. this is very important. do not look at brand that means nothing. always always always check the material content on the tags. ideally you want to be looking for garments that have 100% natural fibres; wool, cotton, silk, linen, rayon/viscose (yes it is natural despite the name). if you can't find 100% than something with an 80/20 ratio or more (to the natural side) can also be a safer bet, but my rule of thumb is the more polyester is in a garment, the worse it is in every way.
my general advice for wedding attire is unless you need black tie, don't worry about trying to find a full suit or a really fancy dress you're only gonna wear once. get a good pair of dark formal trousers (black/grey/navy), wear a dress shirt or a formal blouse, and throw on a nice tailored jacket that's in the same colour family. is it technically only semi-formal? yes, but who does true formal weddings and actually cares about sartorial rules. in this economy? psh. some visual aids:
it's a great combo for any 'events you have to look nice at' because you only have to buy individual pieces, you don't have to buy them all at the same time, and they can be reused for other events. just find out what the colour theme of the event is and get yourself a shirt or tie/pocket square/scarf/other accessory in that colour and you're good to go. also do not forget a good pair of shoes. this is also very important; always have a good pair of shoes.
hopefully this helps! i'm sorry i don't have better recommendations on where to actually go to buy stuff/what to buy, but i haven't shopped new in......quite a long time. but at least having some tips to go by should help. and tbh sometimes you do gotta cough up the money.....BUT only ever cough up the money for something that is 100% natural fibre and is a piece that will get use outside of a single event. otherwise you just gotta be patient and keep looking; if you are patient things have a way of coming to you.
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Wait, there's actually people weighing their gear for backpacking? I always thought it was a joke or something. I used to do a lot more backpacking myself, and the average weight for everyone in my troop was 55 pounds. It's really no issue
I mean... I'm mostly doing it because I have cabin fever and am trying to avoid seasonally appropriate work lol.
But maybe I should clarify why my gear weighs so freaking much.
I don't leave the house without a -10 sleeping bag. I live in the north, there's no guarantee you won't hit freezing in July, and I hate being cold.
Lightweight silnylon just doesn't work around here. Even the day hike trails will snag your gear on black spruce or devil's club and rip holes in it. The few truly lightweight items I have are as much gear tape as original material.
I'm also not going out overnight without my Whisperlight stove, fuel, and Spot beacon. Just no.
Ditto a proper tent. The bugs out here will suck you dry without screens, and the summer storms will find their way under, around, or through any kind of tarp and don't announce themselves more than 10 minutes in advance.
I have a pathological aversion to synthetic hiking clothes. I'll bring some in case I get rained out and need them, but my everyday clothes will mostly be natural fibers tough enough to stand up to the brush that don't feel like crap (do not tell me I'm wrong, I already know every expert says not to do this. Too bad. If I can't hike comfortable, why hike at all?)
My solar panel, backup battery, and book may be labelled luxuries on published packing lists, but they're non-negotiable. Again, what's the point backpacking if I'm bored?
Water bottles. A hydration insert has too much potential to get punctured, and is too limited in what you can use the water for without great difficulty. At least 2 full Contigo bottles go everywhere I go. Plus a filter as backup.
This bag has everything I need except a toothbrush, clothes, and food. It weighs 31 pounds.
Most recommendations for someone my size say don't go over 35 pounds, but this doesn't actually feel too bad. Depending on terrain, weather, and trip length, I could easily add another 10 pounds without worrying. There's still lots of room in the bag if I needed it.
And I don't usually head out for multiple days on my own. If I was hiking with T one of us would take the tent and the other would take the kitchen stuff to break up weight a bit.
So the numbers are a lot better than I'd hoped when I started this morning. Not that it's going to matter for the next 6 months.
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Tag game: Tour my bookshelf!
Thanks for the tag, @hirazuki
An estimate of how many physical books I own: I feel really behind as over the years and moving around I haven't held on to a lot of the books I had once had. At the moment my collection is of roughly 75 books (lost count when my cat wanted to be picked up) including reference books, 36 light novels, 132 manga volumes 11 of which are omnibuses (3-in-1 kind)
Favourite author: That's not actually an easy question for me mostly because I don't pick favourites when it comes to authors, I like different ones for different things. Like I love MXTX for fucked up relationships and situations. And I like the way Tasha Suri and Samantha Shannon describe food in their works The Burning Kingdoms trilogy and The Priory of the Orange Tree. That being said I haven't even tried MXTX's first novel, nor am I clamouring to grab Tasha Suri or Samantha Shannon's other novels, admittedly I am waiting for the prequel follow up to The Priory of the Orange Tree to release in paperback, and Tasha Suri is doing a Doctor Who novel and I'm mildly tempted to check that out, but that's more so the Doctor Who angle.
A popular book I've never read and never intend to read: Honest probably most YA that I didn't read as a kid, I gave an exception to Iron Widow just because I like the author and the youtube content they produced and the concept of imagining the rise to power of the first empress of China as a young woman dealing with some type of alien/monster invasion sounded neat. Another I would say is the first novel from MXTX. There are some tropes from it that sound enjoyable, but I really struggle with the kid eventually growing up and hooking up with his teacher crush for the romance angle. Like I get that because plot technically it shouldn't matter but idk it's just not what I look for when it comes to a romance, yknow?
A popular book I thought was just meh: Under The Whispering Door by TJ Klune. He's the type of author I will only buy on sale as paperback. The House on the Cerulean Sea was super charming and fun, this was just, like sterilized handling of death. Idk I just was not a fan of it, plus the romance of it felt quite weak. Honestly Klune vibes like he'd be better off writing for tweens than adults.
Longest book I own: The Priory of the Orange Tree, if it isn't that then it's this dictionary I have specifically for old timey slang that I found while thrifting.
Longest series I own all the books to: Ascendance of a Bookworm is probably just overall the longest even comparing novels, as by the time they finish publishing it it's going to be some 35ish volumes each at least 300 pages (the odd picture probably drops it closer to 290). I'd say Tian Guan Ci Fu but that's mostly because english translations always wind up longer than the original mandarin, i.e. TGCF is only 3 books long in mandarin but getting 8 volumes in english due to length (although, honestly, I have problems with the way they keep constantly copy pasting the same glossary for each novel, could easily trim 30 pages of that and redistribute the overall story to cut out at least two of those volumes.) Inuyasha for manga and I don't even have half of the series.
Prettiest book I own: Maybe it's because I just finished it, but He Who Drowned the World has an absolutely gorgeous cover. The artwork by JungShan is just so pretty and I love the colour choices.
A book or series I wish more people knew about: Among Thieves and its sequel Thick as Thieves. Just a fun medium fantasy duology with the first book being set up and execution of the heist of a highly important magical item that will determine the fates for everyone around the world. The second dealing with the aftermath of that heist and finding out more about where magic comes from in this world.
Book I'm reading now: .......... The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady volume 3. I know how it sounds and honestly it's better than most isekai nowadays at least.
Book that's been on my TBR list for a while but I still haven't got around to it: The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Tried The Hobbit in high school right around the time I lost interest in reading, feels like it was mostly a me problem so I figured I'd give them another shot. Just gotta find a very specific copy of Return of the King because I already have the others from that set and I don't wanna mix n match too much.
Do you have any books in a language other than English: I used to have a Japanese pokemon card, does that count? French instruction manuals? No? Then no.
And lastly, paperback, hardcover or ebook? Situational. I like hardcover for certain lengths, but I find once you're nearing 600 pages they become irritating. Hardcover is also dependant on how much I like the author/that series as I'm cheap and I've been burned once by disappointment and not letting it happen again. However I do like that certain manga are getting the hardcover treatment, it looks very classy for some of them, like the Thus Spoke Rohan Kishibe specials, and the Fullmetal Alchemist recent prints.
Tagging anyone who really wants to talk about their books!
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