#I trust none of your opinions on storytelling. Get away from me

[imminent-danger-came]

I think people are just simply not ready for the truth that you can "tell" visually and "show" with dialogue

[unmaskedagain]

Not Waiting forever

I’m pretty sure this has been done like a million times already. But I decided I’m going to try to answer as many prompts, that are already in my asks, as I can before I burn out. I AM NOT CURRENTLY TAKING PROMPTS.

THESE will not be full-fledged fics but more than likely ONE-SHOT drabbles. I need to push through my writer’s block. This is disregarding Miracle Queen.

 …It wasn’t Marinette’s choice.

Ladybug, the new guardian after Fu’s tragic heart attack, had gave her opinion but that was it. Kwami were stubborn. No matter what Marinette said in defense of Alya and Nino, Trixx and Wayzz. None of the Kwami were willing to be given out to anyone they didn’t give express approval of anymore. It wasn’t a risk they could take. And now that Marinette was the Guardian on top of being a full time hero, they couldn’t allow just anyone to watch her back. They all decided that Marinette needed someone she could trust and who trusted her. And just as importantly, they needed wielders who better fit them.

Alya failed to see through Lila Rossi. She fell too easily for lies to be a master of illusion. Instead of searching for the truth, gathering evidence, she rather just believe what she’s told. She demanded proof from Marinette rather than believing her friend over someone she just met. She was stubborn and once Alya’s mind was set on something, there was no stopping her.

Trixx refused to go back to her. The kwami wanted someone more creative and free thinking. Maybe a different type of writer, she said. A clever story teller.

Nino failed to stand by his friend when she needed him the most. His lack of loyalty to one of his oldest childhood friends had left a bad taste in Wayzz’s mouth. He chose Alya’s side, and thus Lila’s, without even bothering to hear what Marinette had to say. Or even demanding that they at least take her view into consideration.

If Nino couldn’t stand by his dear friend over a minor issue, the Kwami couldn’t trust he’d guard Ladybug’s back, who a technically stranger to him. Wayzz refused to allow Nino to be his holder again.

           Marinette had gotten more than a bit defensive because despite everything that was going on in class, she still believed Alya and Nino would come around. She believed that the two, and everyone else in class, would realize Lila was lying.  It was just a matter of time.

“That’s the issue, Mistress,” Wayzz frowned at her. “You shouldn’t have to wait for them to have your back.” He told her.

           Trixx nodded, “Alya could’ve easily looked up any of Lila’s claims when you told her Lila was lying. But she didn’t because she didn’t want to. Lila’s tales about Ladybug are a hit on her blog. Alya would rather cling to fool’s gold because its shiny than do what she knows is right.”

           Marinette crossed her arms, “Alya can just get a little… excited. You know how much the Ladyblog means to her!”

“Yes. We do,” Trixx nodded. “What we don’t know is how much you do. From what we can tell… not that much. Alya would rather think you’re jealous,” Trixx added, “And that you’re the problem than consider that her and the entire class got duped. It’s not fair.”

“Your friends routinely ditch you,” Wayzz reminded her. “Ignore you in class, believe the worst about you. They have all but severed their friendship with you completely. This has been going on for months. This is not something that can just be blamed on Lila’s falsehoods. It was their own choices that led to this. We do not trust them.

“I trust them?” Marinette offered weakly.

           Trixx and Wayzz shared a look before shaking their heads.

“No,” Wayzz said. “You want to trust them.”

“There’s a difference,” Trixx told her. “You want to trust them like you want them to be the friends you knew again. You want them back. I’m sorry, Marinette. But we want new holders. All the Kwami do.”

“You need a team now,” Wayzz stated. “Not a later. Hawkmoth is growing stronger. You need allies. It’s time.”

“Pollen doesn’t want a new holder,” Marinette said petulantly.

           There was silence.

“…Pollen was always the weird one,” Wayzz shrugged. “Pollen will never change her mind about Chloe.”

           Marinette narrowed her eyes. That had been the longest argument ever. Eventually Marinette had lost the battle when she was forced to admit how much the blond hero had improved over time. Chloe hadn’t bullied or hurt anyone’s feeling in a very long time. There had been no tantrums or threats to call her daddy. Even without a mask, Marinette had spotted Chloe helping people escape Akumas at the risk of herself. She was proving to be a hero outside of being Queen bee. Marinette did trust her to fight by her side which had been the deciding factor.

Plus Pollen refused to give in, and the only one the Kwami would pick. So Marinette gave in. She went to Chloe as Ladybug and gave her the hair clip.

“Welcome to the team,” Ladybug smiled as best she could.

           Chloe held the hairclip with disbelief and tears in her eyes, “I’m going to be a hero? You trust me.”

“You are a hero,” Ladybug said and did the bravest, and possibly the stupid thing in her life, “Spots off.” She detransformed in front of Chloe. The blonde’s mouth dropped. “And I do trust you.”

“Dupain-Cheng!” Chloe hissed but then goarned. “I should’ve known.”

“Yes, Chloe gets to stay.”

           Trixx giggled, “Pollen only likes Queen Bees, and she hasn’t come across any better than Chloe at your school.”

“And, while, Chloe didn’t like you before, she does now.” Wayzz admitted, “She was always very loyal to Ladybug. She has potential to be a good hero if we can break her love of the limelight completely.”

           Marinette huffed.

“And I remind you, there were conditions,” Wayzz advised. “A new costume and a new name. New hair color. Whatever it takes. She can never tell the public who she really is. Killer Wasp has a nice ring to it.”

           Marinette sighed and slumped face first onto her. She could hear Tikki snickering in the background and vowed to only bring oatmeal cookies to her for the next week.

What was Marinette going to do? What could she do? She had been so excited when the Kwami told her they wanted to get more permanent use like Tikki and Plagg… Until they broke the news. (And just a bit of Marinette’s heart)

           Now Marinette had to find new users.

           Trixx wanted a creative free thinker who wasn’t the least bit stubborn. A different type of writer, Trixx has suggested. A clever story teller.

           Wayzz wanted who had the natural born ability to be a protector. Someone smart and hardworking who had proven themselves to be loyal.

           Marinette’s head snapped up and she glared at the two Kwami, “You already know who you want, don’t you?”

           Trixx and Wayzz smirked.

“In my chosen’s defense,” Wayzz started, “She has proven herself to be loyal to a fault. And with the right amount of confidence, she will be an extraordinary ally.”

“My chosen is so creative,” Trixx swooned, “The most brilliant imagination. As a natural storyteller, his mind was born to see all the possibilities. It allows him to come up with theories and ideas no one else would even consider. There is no illusion he can’t see through because as soon as he sees it hundreds of different explanations run through his head.”

           Marinette raised an eyebrow and gave them firm stare. “Who is it?”

“I want Marc!” Trixx said happily.

The bluenette looked thoughtful for a moment but eventually nodded, admitting that Marc would be a good match for Trixx. “Agreed, I will give Marc a trial run to test his abilities.” Then Marinette turned to Wayzz who was looking very sheepish.

“Hear me out, if we get my chosen on our side, she’d be unstoppable,” Wayzz told her. “There would be nothing she wouldn’t do for those she cares for.”

“Who. Is. It?” Marinette asked again.

“I like her,” Wayzz insisted. “She has potential. If she was just a bit bolder…”

“Wayzz…” Marinette said.

Trixx snickered, “There’s a reason Wayzz gave into Chloe…”

Marinette paused. She slowly sat up on her bed, and looked at Wayzz long and hard, “…Sabrina? You want Sabrina!!!”

“Yes.”

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” The shout could be heard all over Paris.

“She hated me,” Marinette reminded the kwami.

“Disliked you,” Wayzz corrected. “But only because Chloe did. Once Sabrina found out you and Chloe had become friends, you have to admit she has become rather sweet. She’s a hard worker and defended you against Lila three times last week.”

“And you do like her,” Trixx added. “Why else would you have a slumber party with Chloe and Sabrina?”

“…I hit my head a lot during fights,” Marinette shrugged. “Magic can’t take away all the damage.”

           She sighed. Marc and Sabrina, huh? Marinette wondered how that was going to work out. She hated to admit it but Wayzz and Trixx were right. Ladybug couldn’t wait anymore. She needed a team. One she could count on in and outside of the mask. The city needed more heroes.

           It wasn’t right to make them wait just because she clung to a hope that everything would go back to the way it was. Marinette really missed her friends but she couldn’t wait for them anymore. It had been months.

           And even if everyone in class discovered Lila’s was lying, that Marinette wasn’t a jealous, nasty bully, that she was their friend… That Marinette had always been their friend… It wouldn’t matter.

           Truthfully, after everything that had happened, Wayzz was right. Marinette didn’t trust them, she just wanted to. And that wasn’t enough.

           Not enough for Kwami, and not enough for her. (not anymore)

           Nothing could or would go back to the way it was no matter how much Marinette wished it. Once bitten, twice shy. A part of will never entirely trust them again. (Not when they traded her for fool’s gold already before.)

           Paris needed more permanent heroes. Ladybug needed a team. Marinette needed people she could trust.

           She was done waiting.

(She wondered how Alya and Nino would handle being replaced...)

…

…

            ...They didn’t take it well.

(Sabrina, Shield Maiden, and Marc, Renard Masqué, thrived as heroes.)

[mimimimikkyu]

fuck it Rowan rambling

What is/are your OC’s nickname(s) and how did it come about? Ro. It’s a shortened version of their name so it came about kinda obviously. Leon and Hop are the only ones that really use it though. Their dad has called them little litten since they were a child. They were an active kid and acted a bit like a cat sometimes.

What is the color of your OC’s eyes/hair/skin? Brown eyes. Short side shaved hair with the top dyed purple and the side shave naturally black. Warm tan skin.

How tall is your OC? 5’5”, they’re not short but a lot of people they know are taller than them. Even if only by a couple inches. They find this really funny.

What is a noticeable physical attribute of your OC? Their hair and their pointy canines.

What does your OC normally wear? What would your OC wear on a special night? Normally they wear a black sleeveless turtleneck and high waisted pants or shorts along with black boots. Their battling/champion wear is about the same as Leon’s with a different cape. As for formal wear they would go with something like this or this

What is one word you would use to describe your OC’s appearances? Mess

Does your OC have any markings, such as a birthmark or a scar? They have a few knicks and scars from general farm work.. Nothing really stands out about those to the regular person though.

How does your OC talk/what does your OC’s voice sound like?I’d have to come back to this one. I haven’t heard anyone who gives me their vibes yet.

What does your OC’s bedroom look like? Their living area? somethin like this but with more color probably

What does your OC keep in a special drawer? Ask Rose :)

What is your OC’s relationship with their mother? Nonexistent/strained since she left. If they’re honest they’d prefer not to think about her all that much. They do have a step mother but they were older by the time their father met her and thus they’re closer as friends. However if they need motherly advice they’re not afraid to ask.

What is your OC’s relationship with their father? Good. He’s very open and supportive of them and would give up a fair bit to help them out even if they won’t say a thing. They look to him for advice and call him often now that they’ve left the farm/home.

How many siblings does your OC have and what is their relationship with them? They have none biologically. They do consider Hop like a little brother however and they get along just fine.

Who is the mother and/or father figure in your OC’s life? Leon’s mother was like another mother while they were growing up. Even when he wasn’t home they were over often. Either as friendly visits or to help watch Hop for a day.

What was your OC’s childhood like? They moved to Galar when they were 7 with family (their Father, his parents, and their mother) and onto a farm in which they lived and worked. From there on it was mostly normal but behind the scenes there was a fair bit of emotional abuse being thrown their way by their mother. It led to a lot of nights spent running over to friends' houses to get away or crying in the barn.

What is your OC’s strongest childhood memory? Why and how has that impacted him/her? There’s a few things. Firstly Leon’s introduction and want to include them in whatever he did. It sparked a lifelong friendship between the two. Even when he became champion they still tried to stay as close as possible. The other is when their mother started their abuse. Constant yelling at them, telling them they weren’t good enough, they weren’t smart, they never cared about anyone, no one cared about them, they weren’t enough of a “girl” for their her tastes. Things like that. None of that has left them since their mother left/ their father caught on and kicked her out. But all those things are still in the back of their head nagging them to this day.

What is your OC’s imagination like? Half the books they owned while growing up were action fantasy and the other half were picture books of places they thought were pretty. So a lot of their imagination is still things like that. Imagining what it would be like to be in those pretty places, imagining dragon and fairy types roaming around in adventures in those places. Going out and doing those adventures themselves. Sometimes a little bit of romance gets involved in there. They fancy themselves the rogue that charms a noble in those cases.

How many times did your OC move as a child? Which area was their favorite? Just the once, it was a big move that stuck with them but that’s all. Since they’ve known Galar and the farm longer than they ever did their first home it’s their favorite.

What does your OC think of children- either in general or about having them? They like them and they’re good at handling them too. As mentioned earlier on they’d babysat Hop and when they’d go back home to visit extended family they’d always be around the kids there too. Having them is a different story. It’s something they’re really conflicted on. They’re not entirely sure they’d be a good parent and they need to know that whoever they’re with they could trust them to actually parent as well.

What kind of parent would your OC be? Same as their dad; open, supportive, and would drop everything to help their child out. Also puts their entire being into storytelling and play time.

Who are your OC’s closest relatives? Their father and while they were alive their grandparents, grandmother especially. Their father and grandfather showed them everything they know about farm work and their father always encouraged them to try new things but know their limits. Their grandmother showed them everything she knew about cooking and passed on some sewing knowledge to them as well.

Who is/are your OC’s closest friend(s)? Both Leon and Sonia have been their best friends since they moved to Potswick. They confide in them both for different reasons but rely on them both equally.

Who are the people your OC surrounds themselves with? Close friends, family, their pokemon team, a lover. They like other people but it’s a bit harder now for them to hang around random people.

Who are the people your OC dislikes/hates? People who lose their temper easily, people who scream to talk, the press.

If your OC has a soulmate, who is it? Wouldn't you like to know, weather boy?

Why does your OC and their soulmate work so well together?Most of the people in his life tend to kiss up to him a lot or mince their words around him, not Rowan. Rowan, whether they actually thought their words through or just blurted them out, tends to be a bit more blunt and they are not afraid to be so what-so-ever. Grounds him a bit when he needs it. He grounds them as well. He’s quick to pick up on when they’re feeling down and while he isn’t quite privy to everything that happened to them yet he’ll swoop right in and quell any notion they have that’s negative about themselves. Also he's pretty gotten pretty good at telling when they're about to blurt something out and can stop and get them to think.

What are some things your OC admires about their soulmate? His smile, his deep laugh and the way the lines around his eyes crinkle during both those things. His smell is another bonus, they may have stolen a jacket from him just to wear it on nights when he’s not around because of it.

How did your OC and his/her soulmate meet? During the season, as a somewhat belated birthday gift Leon brought them out to Wydon to watch an exhibition match and hang out for a weekend. During which They happened to meet up with the uhhhh, the man. Didn’t go great according to them but it is a part of their story nonetheless. They didn’t get together or really see much of each other for about two years after that when Rowan finally started the gym challenge themself however.

What is your OC’s level of education? High school. They opted to work the farm instead of pursuing much else afterwards. That’s how they grew up, it’s what they knew and honestly they enjoyed it.

Did your OC participate in extracurricular activities, and if so, what were they? Not officially, however despite not taking up being a trainer they’d always ask Leon about it and he was more than happy to share the knowledge.

What is your OC’s opinion of school? What kind of student were they? Average. They just learned what was needed and did a boat load of reading.

What subjects did your OC excel at? foreign language but they cheated technically because they already spoke the language they took at home with their grandparents. Shh, no one has to know.

What subjects interested your OC? Literature specifically, they liked learning about classics. While they never took anything related to it, they admired theater from afar.

What is your OC’s dream job and/or current profession? Currently they’re Galar’s newest champion. In the past they worked on the family farm and would go back to it should they ever step down. In their dreams if they had to settle down they’d like to be a writer of some sort in a house in the middle of nowhere.

How is your OC working towards his/her dream job and/or achieved his/her current profession? For the farm work it’s not really a matter of working towards it. They’ll always have that place back home. For the writing They’d have to actually write.

What are your OC’s thoughts/opinions of his/her current profession? They’re conflicted and entirely unsure they belong in the position they’re in. Even during the gym challenge they weren’t sure they’d ever get as far as the final tournament. A lot of that inner turmoil has to do with their past but they’re good at putting on a show and hiding it. At home they slink into Rose’s arms and tell him the worries of the day and he does his best to give advice or just affirmation.

What is your OC’s biggest dream? Being on the beach, resting in the water, floating away, not a care in the world. That’s about half of what they did when they went back home to see the extended family so it invokes a good fuzzy warm feeling in them.

How does your OC react to and handle stress? Depends on the stressor honestly. If it’s something a bit beyond control they tend to get real quiet and frustrated.

How does your OC handle anger? Not well, they’re afraid of being angry. They’re afraid of being like their mom. And they’re definitely afraid of any anger towards them.

How does your OC handle grief? It’s a multi-step process. They withdraw for a while, cry a lot. They know it’s important to let other people in to help but at least for a few days they just feel the need to be alone.

What is your OC’s greatest fear? Being completely and utterly alone.

What makes your OC happy? Reading, playing or battling with their pokemon, hanging around their friends in a group or one on one, being around Rose.

What kind of sense of humor does your OC have? A bad one.

What are some things that greatly upset your OC? You want like a list? Like memories of their mother for one. The loss of their grandparents. Memories of the darkest day and how they felt during that.

What are some things that annoy your OC? Being asked too many questions, especially when they’re not really given time to think. They know speaking without thought isn’t exactly their strong point so they’re not too keen on being made to do it.

If your OC has them, what are some regrets they have? Being too afraid to tell their father or even their grandparents about what happened with their mother.

How easily does your OC forgive? It takes a bit. They have to be 100% sure the person they’re forgiving means what they say even if it takes a while to get to that point.

What are some of your OC’s vices? Sweets and homemade bread. Absolutely cannot resist.

If your OC experienced trauma, what was it? Emotional abuse. I would consider the Darkest Day and the part they ended up playing in it traumatic for them as well. The entire ordeal was a part of their nightmares for a while.

What secrets does your OC have? Even though they had unofficially broken things off with Rose when the incident occurred they never quite stopped thinking of him. While he wasn't their first, he was one of the first people they could genuinely say they’d fallen for and they’d always played with the idea of seeing him again before they actually bit the bullet and did. Whiiiich was also a secret along with their initial relationship at first as well for about half a year after they got together again. Although eventually their father and Leon came to learn about it before anyone else in that time.

What are some of your OC’s morals? Oh god I wish I knew.

What are some of your OC’s motivations? Family, helping others, bettering themselves

What is the health of your OC? Good, they’re fairly active and can do quite a bit of heavy lifting.

Does your OC think with their head or heart? Oh Rowan doesn’t think, are you kidding me? Haha oh god. Heart though.

What are your OC’s thoughts on death? They choose not to think about it for the most part. Yeah it’s gonna happen but they’re young they have plenty of time to not care.

What are some of your OC’s strengths? Will still do things despite being apprehensive about them. If they’re good they’re good if they’re bad, it weighs on them a bit but they’re learning to not hold it against themselves.

What are some of your OC’s weaknesses? They still haven’t learned to not hold things against themselves and they’re always afraid of someone close turning on them or leaving without a word to the point where they’ll show visible discomfort in certain situations.

How does your OC take criticism? Depends. If it’s constructive they mull it over for a while and try to incorporate whatever it is in any way they can. If it’s not, they’re a bit miffed and flat out walk away from it.

What does your OC think of themselves? Fluctuate between I’m a bad bitch you can’t kill me and oh sad little baby full of feelings.

If your OC could change one thing about themselves, what would it be? The fact that they just kind of Say shit.

What is the general impression your OC gives other people? People can see them as a bit crass. Sometimes a little lost.

How emotionally/mentally vulnerable is your OC with other people? Depends on the people. Totally with their father and often Rose now as well. Leon and Sonia are also people they can be vulnerable with as well but not to the same extent as the other two.

How does your OC display love? Physically. For someone they’re dating it’s little kisses on the cheek or forehead, hand holding, light touches, and cuddling up to them. For friends and family it’s hugs, leaning on them, and light hearted jokes. They also like to cook for the people they love as well.

What are some habits your OC has picked up? Leg bouncing when they’re impatient Twirling and playing with little strands of hair Overly exaggerated gestures when they’re excited Needing to have something, even if it’s just snacks, prepared for any sort of company. They'll pick up little inflections from people they're close to as well

What is your OC’s favorite drink? Juice… Like fruit juice, honestly. The sweeter the fruit the better.

What is your OC’s favorite food? Very very simple but homemade bread with a cut of some kind of salty cheese.

What is your OC’s favorite sweet? Chocolate, cake especially. Double especially if the icing is chocolate as well.

What is your OC’s favorite season? Winter. The crisp air and the clothes they get to bundle up in make them one happy baby. Also cocoa is a huge, huge bonus.

What is your OC’s favorite kind of weather? Bright, clear sky, sun shining down and a gentle breeze rolling through the fields during the day with a slow rolling storm moving in in the evening when they’re all settled in for the night.

What is your OC’s favorite book? Anything fantasy/adventure.

What is your OC’s favorite movie and/or TV show? I don’t know the deep lore on the full entertainment industry in the pokemon universe but I do know I sure do like to draw them as the Phantom a lot. So they get to be into The Phantom of the Opera as well.

What is your OC’s favorite kind music (and song if there is one)? Theatre music and jazz.

What is your OC’s favorite form of entertainment? It was game consoles with friends when they were younger, and admittedly they still play on those from time to time. But now it’s mostly reading and or cuddling up and watching a movie or an exhibition match that they’re not in.

What is your OC’s favorite color? Purple

What is your OC’s favorite scent? That aftershave Rose be wearin. The smell of a clean pasture. The salt on the air on the shore of a beach. Comfort foods as they're cooking.

What is your OC’s favorite animal? They can’t pick a pokemon that would be playing favorites and they don’t wanna do that. Variks

What is your OC’s favorite sound? Laughter, Variks’ little chitters, Thatch’s grumbles when he rolls in his sleep, wooloo and dubwools bleating, wind moving through an open field, waves as they crash on a surface, familiar laughter, and Rose's voice.

What is your OC’s favorite time of day? Morning. They love the still before the day truly starts and the colors in the sky as the sun rises.

What is your OC’s favorite kind of ice cream? Chocolate with any kind of sweet chunks in it.

What is your OC’s favorite dinosaur? Tyrantrum

Ask your own question. why

[mcustorm]

Thoughts on Love, Victor Season 1

PSA: If you think that you might be gay, don’t get a girl emotionally invested! Please!

Ya know, at first when I thought about what I was going to write about this show, I thought that I should split the writings into the first half/last half of the show. Now I’m thinking “screw it”, if only because if I was going to go that route I should have stopped, parsed through my feelings about the first 5 episodes, and written those thoughts before proceeding with the next half. That, of course, did not happen, so to prevent the back half of the season’s events from miring the first half, I’ll just write about the whole shebang. There’s probably a joke about that word somewhere, I’ll try not to make it.

Anyways, let’s start by saying that on the whole, I really liked this show. It was not as good as Sex Education season 1, yet in my opinion waaaay better than HSMTMTS season 1. Most of the characters were likable and felt developed enough, it moved at a nice pace, and you can tell that a lot of heart went into this. Perhaps because we all watched this in a day, it felt like a 5 hour movie rather than a 10 episode tv show.

Additionally, I of course like the Latinx representation. The intersectionality of the Latinx community and the LGBTQ+ community has been presented on at least five TV shows to my knowledge: Ugly Betty, One Day at a Time, Diary of a Future President, The Baker and the Beauty, and now Love, Victor. Let’s keep it up!

As for the premise of the show itself, I *love* that this show acknowledges that Simon’s journey, at least at his house, was leaps and bounds easier than many other people’s. Victor’s parents are more conservative and religious, and they don’t have their shit together, so this is not the best environment to drop that bombshell in (which is why it was so incredible when Victor decides to do it anyway). Simon and Victor’s DM’s being a framing device for the show was a great way to tie the universe together.

The hook of Love, Simon was that you know all those cheesy and cliche rom-coms that straight people have gotten since the dawn of time? Well LGBT people deserve those stories too! Love, Victor is sort of presented with that same thesis in mind, which is why watching these episodes felt like different things I’ve seen before all over. The whole season ironically feels like Alex Strangelove: The TV Show, right down to the often cringy relationship with the girl, the openly gay love interest who conflicts our protagonist, and the goofball friend who chases after a girl who is seemingly out of his league.

Mia’s character felt a lot like Laila from All-American, being a black girl who is ordained as the hottest girl at school (which I feel like is a title only given in fictional schools), who also has a missing mother and problems with her rich dad. Pilar, on the other hand, feels like Casey from Atypical, in that she is openly rebellious in large part because of her mother’s infidelity.

Victor’s story this season sure was something to watch. The biggest question for me was, just how much sympathy should he be given? The world is inherently unfair to Victor. None of us should have to go through the agony and anxiety that so often comes with being in the closet and coming out. But for Victor to have visited those problems on Mia, who is going through things herself? That makes him pretty morally gray.

But he was still finding himself! But he loves Mia, just not like that! I get it, which is why he should have cut things off as soon as he got back from New York, no he should have cut things off when she asked him if there was “anything else” in her bedroom, no he should have cut things off when he literally felt like he and Benji were the only two people in the room at the concert, no he really shouldn’t have done this to begin with.

The line between Victor finding himself and him deceiving Mia is the conflict of the show, but the moment for me when I was like “Damn, Victor” was after he intentionally derailed Mia’s shebang-ing that she planned, he found the gall to lie to Benji and plan a seduction! That is why the season finale was so glorious. Because yes, while the world is unfair to Victor, he’s being unfair to the people around him.

I have made it a point not to read other people’s opinions extensively so as not to bias my own thoughts, but is Felix everybody else’s favorite? Felix’s character and arc was great. He was a supportive friend yet still felt like he had a story and stakes of his own, something which some TV shows get right (Sex Ed) and some TV shows get various shades of wrong (Jamie Johnson, Andi Mack). I like that he knew his worth and cut things off with Lake, and I like that she realized that her happiness with him should take priority over what others think of her.

I was soooo sympathetic to Mia. Her world is being turned upside down at home. Clearly, she has not even processed her mother being out of her life, and now her Dad is “replacing” her Mom while the baby is also “replacing” her! In Mia’s eyes, at least. Mia just needs to know that she is loved and appreciated. Which she *thought* of all people she’d be able to get from her boyfriend. Shucks.

As for the rest of Victor’s family, I also thought the parents’ storyline was pretty interesting yet unfortunate. Armando just can’t come around to trusting Isabel, which I actually kind of understand. Isabel, meanwhile, is being prevented from doing the thing she loves to do, which sucks especially because she’s in a radically new environment. Adrian is of course great, protect him at all costs. Pilar’s seemingly permanent mode of “angsty” is completely justified, as her friends back in TX are moving on just fine without her, she’s having trouble opening up and fitting in, and her family is WYLIN.

Some things that didn’t go so well for me was Andrew’s character, who feels like he’s just there to obstruct at any given moment. Y'all knew that when Victor and Benji were having that convo in the bathroom, someone was in the stall and someone was Andrew. Also, my guy, how are you not even somewhat aware that you are a total douchecanoe? I liked Benji, but Venji didn’t quite work for me because of all of the cheatation that it took to get there. Benji was pissed and ready to stay away from Victor permanently after the [attempted seduction], but once his relationship was over he was completely fine with putting his tongue down Mia’s boyfriend’s throat.

Overall, I really enjoyed this show. Some of these teen dramas I’m admittedly only watching for the LGBT content, so to have that be at the forefront of a show for once was amazing. The conflict was realistic if frustrating, and to me most of the characters seemed fully realized. Thankfully, the show didn’t even feel too “spin-offy” even with Nick Robinson being all over it.

In any given multi-season serialized show, the trajectory of the show goes one of two ways: the first season puts your feet on the ground of the series, and then later seasons go above and beyond with the storytelling (The Office, Breaking Bad, Bojack Horseman, Jamie Johnson) OR the first season is pretty great TV, and the following seasons fail to live up to its glory (The Good Place, Dear White People, really most every Netflix show ever). Which category Love, Victor ends up in is something to look forward to. Where do we go from here now that Victor is taking his first steps out of the closet?

Stray thoughts from the episodes:

The soundtrack on the whole, was not my cup of tea. I still liked a couple of songs, so that means somebody out there liked more of them.

I completely forgot Natasha Rothwell was in Love, Simon. More of her! More of Ali Wong! More of Beth Littleford! They were all great.

So Roger got his ass beat by Armando, and he still wants to get back with her?? Roger is reckless, man.

Speaking of reckless, Victor’s closet skills completely fell apart towards the end there. Assume somebody’s always watching!

Lake’s mother is a trip.

Good for the family for standing up to the grandparents.

Oh my god, Simon and Bram. Those guys are mine, and now they’re growing up and moving to the Big Gay City. They’ve come a long way.

Speaking of the Big Gay City, we were in Atlanta for a season and got *0* acknowledgement of the vibrant gay community there. More things to look forward to.

Was anybody else singing Selena along with Isabel? That is my favorite Selena song!

By rule of Felix being a male and Pilar being a female close in age, I immediately thought they were going to be a thing. The writers didn’t pull that thread too much...

That moment at the end there when we all thought Victor was going to hold off on his announcement only for him to go “fuck it” and say it anyways? And then he got to exhale? Perfect. chef’s kiss

What with June being Pride month, the SCOTUS ruling a couple of days ago, this entire show premiering today, and Delliot things going down in less than 24 hours, this will likely be the gayest week of the year. I suggest we all enjoy it.

Stay Peachy!

[hufflly-puffs]

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Chapter 22: After the Burial

It is a bit irresponsible from Hagrid to ask Harry, Ron and Hermione to attend Aragog’s funeral, knowing they are not supposed to leave the school after dark, and for good reasons, simply because he can’t face the funeral alone. We know Dumbledore is not around (he returns in the middle of the night, about the time Harry gets the memory), and it is possible nobody else knows about Aragog, but still. Don’t put children at risk for something like this.

“Harry stared at them both. ‘Felix Felicis?’ he said. ‘I dunno … I was sort of saving it …’ ‘What for?’ demanded Ron incredulously. ‘What on earth is more important than this memory, Harry?’ asked Hermione. Harry did not answer. The thought of that little golden bottle had hovered on the edges of his imagination for some time; vague and unformulated plans that involved Ginny splitting up with Dean, and Ron somehow being happy to see her with a new boyfriend, had been fermenting in the depths of his brain, unacknowledged except during dreams or the twilight time between sleeping and waking …” – And here I thought he might be saving it for his battle against Voldemort (which he knows will come one day eventually), but no. He saved it so he might has a shot at Ginny. Ironically though the potion does help him on the matter, as the event of the evening will lead to Ginny splitting up with Dean.

“‘He died?’ repeated Harry, shocked. ‘But surely werewolves don’t kill, they just turn you into one of them?’ ‘They sometimes kill,’ said Ron, who looked unusually grave now. ‘I’ve heard of it happening when the werewolf gets carried away.’” – Is this the rumour Tonks heard about? Was she worried Lupin was involved in it, that he had no control over himself or perhaps was forced to kill someone? And even if she knew it was Greyback who had killed the boy she knew how much it would upset Lupin.

“Was it his imagination, or did Malfoy, like Tonks, look thinner? Certainly he looked paler; his skin still had that greyish tinge, probably because he so rarely saw daylight these days. But there was no air of smugness, or excitement, or superiority; none of the swagger that he had had on the Hogwarts Express, when he had boasted openly of the mission he had been given by Voldemort … there could be only one conclusion, in Harry’s opinion: the mission, whatever it was, was going badly.” – What irritates me is that despite Harry noticing how bad Malfoy looks he never pities him in any way. He knows or rather suspects Draco is up to something bad but never wonders why, or if he could be forced to do it. It is obvious that Draco is under much pressure. And yes he is not a good person, but still, Harry only starts to see him in a different light when it is too late to help him. Harry still categorizes people to be bad or good, with nothing in between, unlike Dumbledore, who saw the good in Snape, who will offer Draco help.

I think it is really interesting to see how Felix Felicis works. Harry acts on instinct rather than rational thought. He visits Hagrid based on the feeling that this is the place to be, without being able to explain why. It seems like the circumstances just mold perfectly around him, little coincidences that we would otherwise call lucky. And I guess all the things that happen that evening would have happen sooner or later anyway – Harry getting the memory, Ron and Lavender as well as Ginny and Dean splitting up etc, but the potion created the right circumstances for it.

“Why he knew that going to Hagrid’s was the right thing to do, he had no idea. It was as though the potion was illuminating a few steps of the path at a time: he could not see the final destination, he could not see where Slughorn came in, but he knew that he was going the right way to get that memory.” – This might also work as a metaphor for life in general – you can’t always plan everything, especially not your entire life, just the things right in front of you and sometimes you have to trust that things will turn out for the better in the end.

Also, from a storytelling point of view the Felix Felicis potion works a bit like the Room of Requirement, that is as a Deus Ex Machina. A room that becomes whatever you need it to be, and a potion that instinctively tells you what to do. We do not question it, because it is magic, but you could criticize it as a rather lazy way of writing and getting your plot into the right direction.

It does not make Slughorn any more sympathetic that he only shows interest in Hagrid once he knows that Hagrid can get him valuable things (Acromantula-venom, Unicorn-hair etc). And again he brings alcohol, offering it to Harry, who is still underage.

“‘Where are we burying him?’ he asked. ‘The Forest?’ ‘Blimey, no,’ said Hagrid, wiping his streaming eyes on the bottom of his shirt. ‘The other spiders won’ let me anywhere near their webs now Aragog’s gone. Turns out it was on’y on his orders they didn’ eat me! Can yeh believe that, Harry?’” – Oh Hagrid. He is still a bit naïve when it comes to creatures, always believing them to be misunderstood, underestimating their dangers, for himself and others.

The way to get Slughorn’s memory is to make him feel incredibly guilty (‘She gave me her life, but you won’t give me a memory’) and then offer him a chance to redeem himself (‘You’d cancel out anything you did by giving me the memory. […] It would be a very brave and noble thing to do’). Which is a very manipulative and Slytherin thing to do, just saying.

[sea-changed]

vermiculated replied to your post: the second quarter of 2019 in books 

re: 30, 35, 38: when we asked for f/f, we should have be clearer about our desires: "I want a good book and when they have sex, they can get a little freaky. also I already know about feminism so please take that as read and let them have interesting flaws."

Truly. “I know you’re afraid that books about women won’t sell, but the answer to this is not making the blandest possible characters have the blandest possible romance. No, really, I promise.”

34: ha ha, I assume you are referring to the part where the first third is about various insuperable objections to what happens over the next two-thirds of the book and are never really answered? Not a single book in her oeuvre has a real ending, and I've decided to just live with that.

Right, though? And it comes with the intriguing corollary of a plotline that splits completely at roughly the halfway mark (did you know that Richard’s mother’s death isn’t mentioned one single time after they return from her house?). I think this is perhaps a book that suffers for its genre: I always have the feeling I’d enjoy David/Richard a lot more if it were upfront about its weird tragical nature, and did not try and paper over those cracks with sweeping romantic sentiment.

39! I was entirely swept away by this series last fall, even the kind of clumsy parts. I am glad you did read it, it's weird as all get out but I feel like it owns that in the best sort of pastiche/way where I was always hoping some dude in a Wilkie Collins novel would up and have a husband.

I am pleased I gave it another shot, and while it felt rushed in parts (in truth I want all Charles novels to be like three times longer than they actually are), there were enough interesting feelings that I mostly forgave it.

Ali Smith and Alan Hollinghurst, knocking it out of the park this summer! I agree with you entirely on Hollinghurst: a book is a bunch of sentences, the sentences are admittedly great, why is the book not better? why not, Alan?

Hollinghurst is such a mystery to me: I love the concepts of his books and the great sentence ratio therein is so high, and yet they still are just not that great. Reading Line of Beauty, I think one reason is that I feel so removed from what’s actually happening: the irony that fosters so many of the great lines also leaves the characters feeling somewhat flat and washed-out, and the relationships hardly visible.

What did you think of "Lie With Me" because so far the only people who have said that they like it are people whose judgment I do not trust, as "Call Me By Your Name" was a much weirder book than any of them will admit.

I didn’t not like it, though unfortunately that might be the best that can be said. The CMBYN comparisons aren’t wrong, though not perhaps for the reasons people are making them: the weird alienation from its own characters and somewhat poisonous nostalgia are certainly present in both. I thought LWM was going to end up doing more interesting things with storytelling and narrative construction, but it never quite got as far as I wanted it to. And, in my view, it really needed to do something intellectually interesting to make up for the fact that it’s not particularly emotionally interesting: the narrator’s voice really prevents you from actually feeling anything about the book, as he has such a stranglehold on the narrative throughout that none of the characters, including his younger self, ever really emerge as people. (It turns out every creative writing professor really is right, and it really is super boring to be told everything in a book.) Combined with the fact that it’s so short--really more novella-lengthed--it felt like it never really got to breathe properly as a story.

anyway, I am evidently excited and will have to read a number of these -- I do love your booklists!

Your bookish enthusiasm is always highly appreciated around these parts, and I would love to know your opinions if you do read any of them!

[vague-idea]

This is purely fueled by petty rage and caffeine so buckle the fuckle up.

There has been a lot of talk lately about if Celine was a good person, how bad Actor Mark was, blah blah blah. This is been a topic from pretty much day one of WKM but recently it’s popped up in relevancy. I’ve never really vocalized my thoughts on the matter, despite having many. I’m the kind of person who tears stories apart for fun, so I know a bit what I’m talking about. Get ready for these spicy hot takes, cause guess what: 

They’re all bad. All of them. Including everyone's favorite boy. That’s right, the uwu-too-pure-for-this-world-boy, Damien.  

Now put down your pitchforks for a second and hear me out. You can send me hate later. What I’m here to do is take a look at Mark’s characters, look at their actions (both implied and shown), and then show that none of them are innocent. If this is a mess, uhhh sucks to suck I guess. (the person sucking is me. hah gottem)

First, before I get into the characters however, we need to discuss Mark’s storytelling. Personally I like it quite a bit. It’s interesting and it’s engaging, but it does have its quirks and flaws. You can see the improvement, but it does effect how his characters have come across. Mark himself has admitted to writing Celine poorly in WKM, and I would tend to say that much of WKM should have been adjusted. It’s not “Who Killed Markiplier” but “Why Killed Markiplier” as Mark has said, and the why was never really shown in the series. It’s explained in a live-stream, and if you can’t get your intentions across in the series then something in the script is wrong. Having said that, Mark has improved his writing immensely and I applaud him for that. 

Mark prefers to tell a singular story, leaving much of what he intends up to speculation. He doesn’t tell you the story of how Wilford became the insane goofy murderer he is today; he shows you a moment of weakness and connection between Abe and Wilford. He doesn’t show you how Damien and Celine became Dark, he tells you the story of two siblings protecting each other and being backed into a corner in which playing the part of a villain is their only escape. The intention is plainly there, but you have to understand the characters to truly get the story. “You’re too focused on the minutia” is true. The fans pay too much attention to the details of the story. You have to focus on the characters and their motivations to understand the tale Mark is weaving. Don’t focus on Wilford being in two places at once, or Damien’s hand turning gray in one shot. Focus on the characters and who they are because in the end that’s what they are: characters. With the release of DAMIEN, Mark has made it clear that the characters are the important things, made to be placed into whatever story he pleases. (uh Mark if you’re reading this that is a dope idea and holy fuck im hype)

Now to actually talk about the characters. 

Let’s start with Celine, since she is the main focus of this debate. First and foremost, Celine is manipulative. She knows what she wants, and she will get it at any cost. This is shown from the moment she steps into the manor. She turns everyone against the DA. Isolating us, and making us feel vulnerable. Then, with a gracious olive branch, she let’s us help. We are now special, but we can only trust Celine. An interesting parallel to “Don’t Trust the Seer.” After the DA has the fall, Celine is there yet again. Forcing Damien asleep, she uses us to gain a body, and then kicks the DA out into the mirror, making us now a viewer of this world. In DAMIEN, she manipulates Damien into sleeping. Keeping him tucked away and safe. Celine’s primary characteristic is manipulation. Getting what she wants, no matter the cost. She is protective, she is abrasive, she is determined, and she is cold. 

Now let’s look at Mark. His personality isn’t so plainly laid out as the others (seeing as he fuckinn dies in the first five minutes), so we’re going to have to rely on what the others have said about him to get the picture. The first thing we hear about Mark is from the Colonel. Obviously, a man with prejudice, but still has an insightful look into who Mark is. “My name is Markiplier now! Forget that my friends are the ones who helped me along the way. Just look at me and my money. I need to pay people to be my friends. Ahaha. Oh you like me, too bad.” Then, even Mark himself has said: “I used to be somebody. Maybe not somebody good, but I was somebody.” (Granted this is from the meta ending, but I’m still going to use it because ADWM still applies and I’m an asshole and you can’t stop me) Both these sentences are inferring to a man who was changed by fame and fortune. This infers to a man who took and took, so up his own ass that he started ignoring his friends in favor of becoming richer and increasingly powerful. I think that is that crux of Mark’s character: power and control. 

In DAMIEN, Mark has some insightful comments that back this up. “You stole everything from me.” ... “Well you wouldn’t even have anything in the first place if it wasn’t for me.” ... “You were never good enough for Celine.” ... “I gave up everything for her!” This exchange back and forth between Damien and Mark leads me to believe that Mark, through his power and fame, gave the twins everything they had. He gave Damien his mayor position. He gave Celine money, influence, power, and his love. Mark might have thought he was doing these things for them, but if you look at who Mark is, he was doing these gracious actions to have control over the twins. Damien now owes Mark for giving him his job and his power. Celine owes Mark for her comfortable home and a loving husband. This is further proved by Mark’s interaction with the Colonel. Using the money that William owes to Mark, the guilt of cheating with his wife, Mark controls the Colonel and makes him work for him. Controls him, up til the moment that William looses his mind. Mark values control, and he values power. 

I don’t think I need to explain how Wilford is a bad person, but ya know let’s just say it: cheater and murderer. His character is insanely fun, and I love the depth and nuances to it, but he’s not the one we’re focusing on today. Here’s just here for me to say that I love him, and he was just a pawn in the backstory of WKM. 

Now, for the controversial opinion. Damien. Everyone’s sweet, innocent, could never hurt a fly, mayor. Well, sorry my guys but that is just not correct. Damien’s role in this story is integral, and let me say the misjudgment of his character annoys me a lot but that’s just cause I’m salty all the time so let’s just jump into it. Damien is not innocent. As Mark says, “Always the righteous crusader. Pure as the driven snow. Acting like you’re the only one without blood on your hands.” There is blood on his hands. Good intentions aside, Damien has a fatal flaw and that is that he is a coward. He may want what is best for everyone, but he cannot find his own spine. Throughout WKM, despite being the mayor - a fuckinn leadership position - he takes a backseat of running after the Colonel, running after the DA, and running after Celine. He is easily used, and easily discarded. He lets others walk over him, and in doing so lets everything around him fall apart. It isn’t until DAMIEN when he has lost literally everything that he finally sheds the title of pawn and becomes a player. Damien isn’t pure. He is soaked with the blood of every dead body he could not lead and he could not protect because he was too much of a coward to do what was right. 

Looking at all of these characters, I hesitate to label them as bad or good. I know I just said that they’re all bad, but welcome to clickbait. Celine is manipulative, but she cares about her brother and she fights for herself. Mark is power hungry, yet he loved and he lost. Damien is a coward, yet he cares for others. Looking at them as they are, I cannot say that they fit perfectly into role of villain or hero. This story isn’t that simple. It’s created to flip the script. 

But, everyone is arguing about Celine and Mark’s past so let’s jump into that mess of a conversation. 

Celine is a manipulator. Mark wants control and power. Damien wants everyone to be happy. William/Colonel has a one track mind and currently it’s set on fuck. This is who they are, and from this we can try and determine their backstory. Granted, this is my view and my speculation but I think I’m pretty on track. I can honestly say that at one point, Celine and Mark loved each other. They are both too obsessed with having what they want to settle for marrying someone they hate, or even marrying someone they were indifferent too. They loved each other, and they had to have each other. Things can change, however. What started as something fueled by love can turn into something fueled by vengeance. 

Mark is obsessed with control, and so he tried to keep a tight hold on what he loved. Celine detests being the pawn when she is the player, and so when she wanted William, she had to have him. Throughout the series it is shown that Mark viewed Celine as his. William/Colonel stole her from him. She was his, and she was taken. On the opposing side, Celine is no prize to be kept. Her love shifts from Mark to William/Colonel and she takes what she wants. At the end of the day, she would carve their hearts out for attempting to keep her in a cage as their pretty songbird. Also, I believe that Damien knew that Celine was cheating, but he couldn’t bare being the one to break apart his childhood friends, so he said nothing. He let his cowardice destroy what he only wanted to preserve. 

Celine and Mark could have never worked together, because they both want to control and they couldn’t control each other. Damien could not lead, and was used and walked over until he and those he loved were dead. William/Colonel barely had a say; each step he took was a line in Celine and Mark’s strategy. It wasn’t until he broke that he was able to break the script. 

So what does this mean, Eli? Who is the good guy and who is the bad guy? Why doesn’t this story play into exactly what I want? Why don’t these characters fit these little tropes I want to place upon them? 

It means none of that, reader. You can call them bad, and you can call them good. You can make Damien into a hero, and you can make Celine into an abuser. You can say Mark was taken advantage of, you can blame the manor, or you can call him evil. You can do whatever you want with them, but that is only possible by ignoring that they are so much more than that. This story is not meant to fit into a square. This story at its basis is to show that these are stereotypical characters, meant to play a role, who have broken it. 

[theclaravoyant]

musings on the evolution of bisexuality in sitcoms and being treated “like a joke”

Not to open up old cans of worms, but for my video project I was thinking about the subject of Eleanor Shellstrop (The Good Place) and various opinions about her bisexuality, the status of it canon-wise, and in particular the feelings amongst some of the fandom (and non-fandom) that it is treated “like a joke.” I have heard similar things about Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn 99) as well regarding the latter point and so that worked its way in, and soon enough this ended up sort of turning into a short ish essay. I’m not really trying to argue a particular point, but merely reflect on some things, and I hope you don’t mind I thought I’d share my musings. It boils down to being laughed at vs being laughed with, which I get to below the cut after a brief exposition (I have some Thoughts)

Note: I am not looking to get into an argument with anyone, and I’m not saying this is the be all and end all answer to rep, but if you wanted to share some thoughts, add on, etc, you’re welcome to do so.

Note II: Just for clarity’s sake, non-LGBT+ people are welcome to interact if you would like to do so.

I must admit, moving back to the topic of Eleanor for a minute, I resonate with some of those feelings I outlined above. For example, I don’t particularly care for the fact that we have never seen her engage in an abiding romantic or even sexual relationship with a woman, whereas her romance with Chidi has been rebooted over and over and is consistently the outcome. It grates on me a bit that in a universe which has been rebooted upward of 4 different times that we have seen (and approx 300 other times shoved into a few minutes) this is the outcome every time. Why not explore another option for a season? I love Cheleanor, don’t get me wrong, and the constant rebooting annoys me from that perspective as well not just the f/f perspective, but in terms of sapphic rep and also considering how often bisexuality is exploited and misrepresented by heteronormative storytellers (eg the tropes “Bi the Way” and “Not Too Bi”), it really sucks.

Edit: I deleted a paragraph here that had some examples I had misremembered and was rushing through. Shockingly writing up a train of thought on a bus leads to some inaccuracies and skipping over of valuable debates. Instead, I will say that I don’t mean by the above, that m/f bi attraction is not real and valuable. It certainly is. What is a pain in the ass in my opinion - and in the opinion of a lot of the bi people I know before anyone comes at me with that again - is when bisexuality is only used to make a character interesting, sexy or rebellious, while still only representing the m/f side of things because that is easier/more comfortable/etc for heteronormative writers and viewers to portray and invest in.

THAT SAID, back to my actual point. I think we (particularly we who are LGBT+ ourselves) are also very accustomed to seeing LGBT+ characters in dramas, where bad things happen and there’s angst and death and gnashing of teeth. I think this being the norm leads us to freak out a bit and not necessarily know how to actually handle positive, happy rep in which we ourselves, our identities, are taken seriously. We are so used to either being a tragedy or being laughed at (rather than with) that it is extremely unsettling to experience what I would call a dawning new era of being respected in sitcoms - including The Good Place, Brooklyn 99, One Day at a Time, and I’m sure there are others as well.

It’s not surprising, with this skittishness trained into us, that some people interpret the treatment of Eleanor’s bisexuality as being a joke. I’m also not saying this knee-jerk reaction is the only reason; again, I’m not saying my thoughts & feelings on this are the be all and end all of rep. I am just saying that it was a major reason why I was uncomfortable at first: it is extremely hard to trust people to joke around about us, and our identities, and especially with the added element of the unique hypersexualisation of bisexual f/f attraction. But recently I’ve been rewatching some older and less progressive, less inclusive sitcoms and in comparison, it becomes very clear, the difference between being the butt of the joke (laughed at) or being part of a joke (laughed with). It might help - not just with Eleanor, but with others too - to give some examples:

In Friends, Monica, Rachel and Phoebe, only use the idea of f/f attraction when they want to get the boys’ attention, distract them, win bets, or the like. They are successful in this explicitly because the men find this idea so ridiculously, mind-bogglingly sexy that they can’t think. Yet NONE of these main characters are ever revealed to have an actual, serious attraction to girls; none of them express it outside of the direct goal of getting male attention. Similarly, in How I Met Your Mother, Lily’s repeated expression of a desire to kiss a girl is put down to her artistic nature and rebelliousness, and is repeatedly called “so stupid”, and again, is only used to get male attention (to wake up Barney). When she finally kisses Robin, it goes away (bi experiment trope), and it is implied that ~lol~ after all that Robin might actually want more, but that is then left hanging and never revisited again. There are heaps more, I could go on, but these are all examples of being laughed at. 

Compared to these sorts of jokes, let us reflect on Eleanor again. Jokes around her sexuality include: being so attracted to her female nemesis that Eleanor can’t insult her profusely without starting to compliment her, and being so attracted to her boyfriend’s girlfriend that in a simulation where she plays him, she goes to kiss the girlfriend instead of her assigned goal, which was to break up. If this sounds more like #relatable sapphic content than a dismissive joke, that’s because it is. These jokes could not happen without Eleanor’s attraction to women, that is true, but the attraction itself is not the joke. The joke lies in Eleanor’s reactions to the attraction as a messy, funny, sexually driven human. In this way, her bisexuality forms part of the joke, but it is paired up with her other personality traits as a comedy character to be laughed with. Similarly, with Rosa Diaz, her stunned moment upon seeing Alicia is funny because it is an example of what we in the biz of gay ass blogging sometimes refer to as “useless lesbian brain” (or in this case “useless bi brain”). It’s cute because the love interest is a girl and because Terry is hyper-enthusiastic that it’s a girl. It wouldn’t work as well as a joke if it was not a girl, and heteronormativity is almost definitely the reason for that, but the point still stands that the bisexuality itself is not the joke, it’s the way she responds to it: it’s the fact that Rosa Diaz, usually so suave and in control, loses the ability to Can. Terry’s overly enthusiastic allyship is also funny, but mostly to people who have experienced overly enthusiastic allyship ie the LGBT+ audience.

(To add one final example: I am not aware of ANY male bi rep in older sitcoms, which kinda speaks for itself, but in the more modern ones we have characters such as Darryl Whitefeather (Crazy Ex Girlfriend). One of the biggest jokes around his sexuality is his coming out as “both-sexual!!” Once again, the joke is not the bi attraction itself, but rather, in the fact that lol this pour bi soul didn’t know the word for it! Another example imo of being laughed with).

I know I’m not saying all that much new here. Probably nothing new, to some people. I also know I’m not addressing every joke or facet of bi or LGBT+ rep even in the shows I’ve just listed. I’m not trying to, I mean none of us have all century. I just think it’s important to highlight what I feel is usually quite a strong difference between being laughed at and being laughed with, and that was the main idea of this post. It’s definitely not always as simple as the examples I’ve outlined above (eg. some of the Eleanor jokes are similar to jokes made in Pitch Perfect, in which I would say it’s about being laughed at), but I am just trying to put some words to some of my thought process on this sort of thing, particularly as I rewatch Friends and think about how far we’ve come with it!

One final time, because people in my inbox don’t seem to get it, I am not claiming to be ‘correct’. This is just an aspect of my feelings and opinions. I am also not trying to ‘speak over’ people who actually ID as bi; in fact, it was bi people saying ‘why can’t you let us have funny things’ that actually opened my eyes to a more comfortable bi-friendly interpretation of the treatment of Eleanor’s sexuality in the first place. I’m not trying to say “this is good rep, actually,” or “this is bad rep, actually.” As I said above, I think it’s both, and I think it’s more complicated than that, and most importantly, I am not actually trying to change anyone’s mind. If you resonate with this? Cool. If not, that’s fine. It’s my thoughts, my opinion. It’s not fact and I don’t want to tell anyone how to feel especially about their own rep.

With that in mind, if anyone is interested in chatting with me more about this sort of thing (by which I do not mean harassing me about it) or asking me what I mean by certain things, or for writing advice, or whatever, you’re welcome to do so - this is just the tip of the iceberg! I just wanted to put this out there in the world for whatever purposes it might come to. Thanks for reading!

[beccaland]

What are your opinions on the RTD era's companions' relationship with the Doctor? 'Cos personally, they bother me a little sometimes, and I was curious what your opinion was.

Yeah, they bother me a little too. I’m actually going to share some thoughts about the characters themselves, as well as their respective relationships to the Doctor. Partly, I want to do that because not to do so would be an injustice to the characters. So, here goes.

Rose (and Mickey a bit, because you can’t really separate an analysis of their characters and he’s a companion too):

Rose is a charismatic character, and I think just right for relaunching the series. She’s young and displays many of the flaws of young people, yet in other ways is more mature than other adults, including her own mum–indeed Rose is often seen taking on a role of parenting her parent. While Jackie seems content to live off the dole, Rose has a job. It’s not a particularly good job, but she seems to be given a fair bit of trust and responsibility, probably above what her official position warrants, which suggests that she’s earned the admiration and reliance of her boss–and given her home life, that’s not surprising. Rose is clearly used to having to be more responsible than her peers. She’s vibrant, curious, compassionate, and brave.

She also takes advantage of Mickey’s affection for her, perhaps without realizing it (at least at first). She’s pretty judgy generally, and she’s not above using the Doctor as well. This suggests that despite (perhaps in part because of) being brought up by an emotionally immature parent and having to take on a lot of responsibility before she was really old enough to bear it, Rose is quite selfish.

Now, as to her relationship to the Doctor, meeting him does two things for her: it gives her an apparently easy escape from a life she feels trapped in, and it gives her the opportunity to develop a relationship with someone unlike anyone she’s ever known, who seems to see potential in her far beyond what any other person in her life has ever shown (especially Jackie and Mickey), and who is both willing and able to protect her and to care about what she feels and wants. Am I saying the Doctor started out as more of a parent-substitute than a boyfriend? Yes I am. Is that kind of creepy? I think so. But not necessarily more creepy than him being her boyfriend, given the age gap.

OK, so Rose gives Mickey a kiss and obliquely tells him “thanks for nothing” before swanning off with the Doctor. By the time she comes back, a year has passed for everyone she knows but just one day for her. This causes ENORMOUS problems for Jackie and Mickey in particular, and she does seem genuinely sorry (well, sorry to Jackie–she seems mostly annoyed with Mickey’s anger AT BEING SUSPECTED OF MURDERING HER. BECAUSE SHE RAN OFF WITH AN ALIEN). This gets swiftly brushed aside by alien shenanigans, and Rose swans off again–leaving Mickey apparently in some doubt as to their relationship status. The nature of her relationship to the Doctor is also left ambiguous at this point, but she’s clearly not thinking of him as “substitute for parental acknowledgement and affection” anymore. She flirts like crazy with Jack who flirts like crazy with both her and the Doctor and both she and the Doctor seem vaguely jealous of the other’s attention to Jack. Back to Mickey meeting them in Wales, who apparently STILL DOESN’T KNOW that Rose has basically dumped him, and does she make that clear? No, but the Doctor is acting more and more like a jealous boyfriend (and really doesn’t stop treating Mickey like garbage until the poor guy saves them and stays behind in Pete’s World, thus earning his respect, I guess, and also removing the threat), and none of this is Mickey’s fault. He’s astute enough to see, at least, that the Doctor and Rose’s relationship is destructive to others.

After the Doctor regenerates, they’re 100% in couple mode, with Rose referring to the events of S1E2 as their “first date” and the Doctor happily assenting to this characterization (has Rose actually broken up with Mickey yet? Honestly can’t remember, but I don’t think Mickey knew it if she had). The Doctor and Rose have a deeply codependent relationship. We might attribute this to her dysfunctional relationship with Jackie and the Doctor’s recent PTSD. They latch onto each other like needy puppies, and this isn’t a criticism, because there are really people who fit these profiles, and they are not bad people, and it does make for interesting characters and good storytelling, but it’s by no means a healthy depiction of a relationship.

Consider, for instance, that the Doctor tries to send her away (no doubt he felt he was making a noble sacrifice, but he did this against her clear and repeatedly expressed wishes, and with the complicity of Pete). Rose ignores the Doctor’s clearly expressed wishes and comes back, which, fair enough I guess, but it all ends in tragedy anyway. So what does he do? HE BURNS UP AN ENTIRE SUN just so he can say goodbye. I mean, I’m sure he verified it was not an inhabited solar system, but seriously. In that goodbye chat, he specifically tells her that they cannot get across the barrier between universes because “the whole thing would fracture. Two universes would collapse.”

Does Rose accept the judgment of the person who is unquestionably the foremost person in either universe able to evaluate the risk of such an attempt? No she doesn’t. We learn in series 4 that even before the stars started going out, she was having Torchwood build a DIMENSION CANNON to P U N C H. A. H O L E. IN THE UNIVERSES!!! like presumably as many as it took for her to find the right one. Just so she could get back to him. AFTER HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT IS NOT WHAT HE WANTED. BECAUSE IT WOULD DESTROY THEM. This is portrayed as romantic rather than horrific. Seriously. And then he dumps his problematic clone on her and goes back to his own universe. SO ROMANTIC. Sorry, I try not to be rude about Rose’s relationship with the Doctor. I think it’s actually an interesting dynamic that makes sense in context, but it really bugs me that so many people view it unproblematically, and it bugs me even more that people don’t imagine both Rose and the Doctor growing out of it. Like, I can’t lie: I think that’s wacked and super unhealthy, in much the same way (though to a lesser degree) as the Twilight series and its fans are, except Doctor Who is still better-written and far more interesting.

That said, I’d be willing to read a well-written fix-it fic that depicts them growing out of their unhealthy codependent dynamic while staying together romantically. TBH I’d be more interested if it were Rose and Tentoo because then it would be canon-compliant, but I’m not too picky on that point. I AM picky about it not even remotely disrespecting the relationship the Doctor had with any other companion though. And it would have to have a whole “you were so obsessed with me that you were willing to destroy an unspecified number of universes, INCLUDING THE ONE YOUR FAMILY AND BEST FRIEND WERE IN, just to see me again for a brief period of time before this universe also collapsed WITH US IN IT and honey, that’s actually CREEPY AND GROSS even though I thought it was super sweet at the time, but in my defense the universe was already ending at that point anyway and you don’t have that excuse because in your case it was PREMEDITATED” conversation because otherwise I won’t believe they’ve actually grown as people. Also it’d be nice if it were funny more than angsty (but lbr you can’t write what I’m talking about without a fair amount of angst). So, y'know, if anyone has actually written that fic lmk.

Meanwhile, there’s MARTHA.

OK so I’m on record about how awesome Martha is. This is already getting long so I won’t belabor Martha’s total awesomeness as a character, but even though I got a bit tired of dysfunctional family relationships in New Who, it was novel to see them have any ongoing family relationships at all, and Martha’s was particularly rich, partly there were so many of them for her to interact with, thus revealing lots of different facets of her character. And despite her fractious relationship with them, she remained fiercely loyal, which was an interesting source of tension between her and the Doctor, and one that diverted attention away from the dental-drill painfulness of the unrequited love subplot.

It’s super gross that the writers made her hung up on the Doctor all the way through series 3. Not because it’s ridiculous for an intelligent, perceptive, professional young woman to be hung up on an emotionally unavailable man. No, that really happens to actual human beings (and again, possibly related to serious parental issues, so it’s not even without narrative justification). Handled with any sensitivity at all, it could have made for a lovely level of complexity. What really bugs me, and I’ve also written about this before, is how the Doctor treats her like GARBAGE, and this is barely addressed as a problem that he is responsible for. In the end Martha realises her mistake in sticking around for so long, but her attempts to call out his bad behavior in the past fell on deaf ears. Martha is the rebound girl but he acts like he doesn’t even know he’s doing it. Which, IDK, maybe he really doesn’t know? Like for all his 900+ years the Doctor has little previous actual relationship experience and also he’s super blindingly hung up on his high school-esque sweetheart Rose. And it’s not just in regards to Martha’s romantic feelings that he treats her poorly. He also dismisses her VERY VALID CONCERNS about her own safety and well-being when traveling in the past for the sake of his own whims. And he brushes off legitimate questions about how stuff works. Anyway. This is well-trodden ground. As is the fact that RTD later inexplicably fobs Martha off on MICKEY, the only other black companion in the series up to that point, despite having already paired Martha off with a cute, sweet doctor who seemed like a MUCH better fit, and there literally being no narrative reason for them to be a couple in that scene.

Donna! Well, as we all know, Donna is among the best-developed companions ever.

She didn’t start out that way though. She started off as a Deeply Problematic (read: disgustingly misogynistic) Stereotype who was never meant to be more than a one-off, but CT and DT got along so well that they brought the character back full-time, and so we got a lot of deconstruction, exploration, and development of that first impression. And I’ll forever be happy we did. But even in The Runaway Bride, she had moments of surprising depth and pathos. Deep down, Donna was always better than she seemed. The fact that she was the last person (other than her mother) to realize that fact is part of what makes her so compelling.

Her relationship to the Doctor is also the least problematic, because they’re both on the same page about being platonic bffs. To be fair, part of the reason he does make sure this is clear from the outset is because he has finally realized how he hurt Martha (NOT THAT HE EVER APOLOGIZED TO MARTHA FOR THAT–for a guy for whom “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry” was basically a second catch phrase, Ten actually sucks at apologising to the people close to him). Unlike Martha, the Doctor doesn’t overlook Donna or brush off her concerns. Unlike Rose, he is not codependent with her. Donna calls him on his BS, and he listens. She helps him to face his emotional vulnerability rather than running from/shutting out potentially scary personal relationships (like with River and Jenny). The Doctor helps Donna to see that she really is brilliant and important, and she grows to believe him.

That’s not to say that Donna’s character was handled perfectly. No, indeed. Even after her first story, we’re repeatedly subjected to jokes about her desperate need for and inability to get a man. Even the Doctor, who is otherwise kind to her, takes these jokes for granted and sometimes participates in them. At the end of series 4, we’re shown that the one person in the universe that Mr. Pansexuality Personified, JACK HARKNESS has no interest in flirting with is Donna Noble, the man-hungry middle-aged slightly overweight loud temp from Chiswick. And then, of course, the Doctor denies her agency and takes away her access to the memories of everything she saw, everything she did, everything she discovered about herself while traveling with him. Just so he wouldn’t have to see her die. It was selfish of him. She made her choice and he ignored it to spare HIMSELF pain. But, y'know, at least the Doctor cheated the lottery to make her rich as a wedding present to a very attractive, kind-looking, and clearly adoring man–right before he regenerated. So she did get a happy ending.

[tearsofwinter]

Behind Closed Doors

Rating: G Summary: Varric is a storyteller, and sometimes that mean making up lies to protect the ones you care about. So what did really happen between Fenris and Anders during their time in Kirkwall? A Fenders story told from Varric’s POV

Varric looked up when he heard a hard knock on his door. "Your Inquisitoralness! What a surprise. Did you need something, or are you here to admire the dwarf?" Smiling, he pulled up a chair for the Inquisitor to sit. "I'll say it now, if you're here for Cassandra, tell her the newest 'Swords and Shields' will be done when it's done. You can't rush masterpiece."

"If your revenge on Cassandra is making her wait for the next installment... it's working. Promise not to make her wait too long. The last I saw her, it looked like her head was about to explode." Trevelyan sat where Varric pointed. He placed his elbows on his knees and leaned forward, closer to the dwarf. There was a gleam in his eyes, one that Varric recognized from rabid fans. "About 'The Tale of the Champion', I've got a few questions."

"Oh boy, here we go." Varric folded his arms and sighed. "Look, kid, the thing about Orsino, it was added for extra excitement. In hindsight, I would edit that part out. Now, if it's about Hawke, I hear she's out by the ramparts. You can ask any questions you have about the Champions yourself."

Trevelyan scoffed. He scooted his chair closer until their knees bumped. Varric leaned away- only a tad- for breathing room, but Trevelyan took it as a sign to invade the other's space even more.  "I just came back from talking to Hawke...and I can't believe you lied! You kept it a secret from me! How could you?” 

"Of course I lied. It's a occupational hazard." Varric placed a hand on the young man's chest, and gently pushed him back into his seat. In the middle of his spiel, Trevelyan stood up and inched closer and closer until their nose touched. "What I'd lie about this time?"

"ANDERS IS ALIVE!"

Varric slapped a hand over the boy's mouth. "Shhhhh!!! You want the entire Inquisition to know?!" Nervously, he glanced around to check if anyone heard, but the door was closed and the room was empty. Still, it paid to be careful. Varric removed his hand. "Where'd you hear that from?"

"Hawke! We were talking, and I asked about Anders, how could she do that to him when they've been friends for over a decade. He protested peacefully for years, but no one listened. He was pushed to a corner, and did what he had to do!" Cheeks red from a lack of air, words spilled out of Trevelyan's mouth as fast as his mind spun. Varric felt the lack of oxygen himself as he watched the Inquisitor try not to trip over his own tongue. Trevelyan sucked in a much needed breath, and continued. "And so Hawke asked me what was my opinion on the Chantry explosion, and I said, good riddance!"

Realizing his own outburst, Trevelyan clapped a hand over his own mouth. Sheepishly, he looked at Varric, ready to be ridiculed or scolded, but he saw no judgment in the dwarf's eyes. Instead, there was understanding. His shoulders slumped in relief, and he sighed.

"So Hawke told you the truth then?" Varric guessed. "She told you she didn't kill Anders?"

"Yes! So what's the truth? What really happened?" Trevelyan was trembling with excitement. "Please tell me!" 

"Alright, alright." Varric held his hands up in surrender. "But first, I need to know something. What's your opinion on Anders? Why the..." He gestured at the young man's jittery state, "interest?"

"He's an idol," Trevelyan said without hesitation. "At least he's my idol. I've heard stories about him, about how he escaped Kinloch hold seven times, how he joined the Grey Wardens and fought darkspawns. I know what they say about him, that he's a terrorist, a murderer, but I don't think so. He did what needed to be done, even if it branded him a villain. So I have a question for you, two questions actually, regarding Anders."

"You can ask, but I can't promise I'll answer," Varric said, crossing his arms. "Give me your best shot."

Finally, the chance to get the answers to his burning questions was here. Trevelyan's bluster attitude vanished in a snap, and what was left behind was a bundle of nerves. A blush formed on his cheeks as he fidgeted in his seat. "Well...my first question is where is Anders? And my second one is..." He looked away, unable to meet Varric's gaze. "...is he single? He's not seeing anyone is he?"

Varric burst out laughing, stunned by the unexpected question.   

"This...this isn't funny!" Trevelyan shouted, indignant and hurt by his friend's reaction. "I'm being serious!

Varric wiped away the tears at the corner of his eyes. "Sorry," he said, a few chuckles still escaping, "You caught me by surprise. I'm not laughing at you. But I have some bad news for you." He laid a consoling hand on Trevelyan's shoulder, and shook his head. "Anders is seeing someone, and the two of them are such lovebirds, it makes you want to puke."

"But...but it's only been a year since Kirkwall! He found someone in that short amount of time?"

"I might've omitted some things, fudged up some details in my book. Hazard of the trade and all that, you know how it is."

"You're saying Anders had a lover while he was in Kirkwall? Since before the explosion? Impossible." Trevelyan couldn't wrap his head around it. Ignoring Varric's novel, none of the reports or heresy about Anders mentioned a lover. If he had one, someone should've noticed. Everything he knew about Anders said he acted alone; his sole companion was the spirit in inside him. It wasn't any Trevelyan's business, but he was curious. "Who is it? Is it someone I know?"

Varric scratched his chin, contemplating how much he should tell the Inquisitor. "You...could say you know him."

"So it's a man!" Trevelyan paused, then took in a scandalized breath. "Maker, Varric is it you?"

"No! No, no, no. Shit, I like Blondie, but not like that."

"Aw, you called him Blondie. After I heard you talking with Vivienne about Kirkwall, I thought you hated him."

Varric sighed. "I did for a while. It took some thinking, but I realized I was more disappointed in myself. I failed him like I failed Batrand...But enough about me." Varric waved it aside. He was never good at dealing with feelings, and he wasn't going to start now. "You wanted to know who Anders' mysterious lover is? I can tell you, but you have to keep it a secret. It's a matter of life or death here."

"Cross my heart and hope to die. You know you can trust me, Varric. I'm the most trustworthy guy there is. I even pardoned Anders, except Josie said that could be bad publicity. Said we should wait until Celene's ball to make the announcement. I don't see what's all the fuss is about. I'm a mage. It's not like they're going to li-"

Varric slapped another hand on Trevelyan's mouth. He forgot that once Trevelyan got going about something he felt passionate about, he couldn't shut up. Just like another mage Varric knew. "Alright, alright. I got it, sheesh."

Removing his hand, Varric stepped away from the Inquisitor and began pacing. Where to begin, he wondered. The subject was harder for him to talk about than he thought. Sure, he wrote a novel about Hawke's life that included some of her sexual and romantic exploits, but Anders' relationship was different. It was much harder to grasp and put into words.

"Fenris," Varric blurted it out. Best to just get it out there. Grab the bull by its' horn and all that crap.

Trevelyan blinked, sure that he'd heard wrong. "Excuse me?"

"I said, Anders' lover is Fenris. They have been together for years now. Closing in on a decade now if I recall."

"..."

"..."

"...You're shitting me," Trevelyan finally whispered, then a little louder. "You have got to be shitting me. No. You're telling me Anders and Fenris are together? They're lovers? But in your 'Tale of the Champion', they hate each other! They could barely be in the same room!"

"That was done deliberately. It's easy for Anders to blend into a crowd. Grow a beard, dye his hair- anything. It's harder for Fenris to blend in. His marking makes him stand out. Since everyone assumes Fenris hates Anders, he's the last person they suspect. No one is going to think the tall blond next to Fenris is Anders."

In absolute awe, Trevelyan’s jaw dropped. “Maker, Varric, you’re a genius.” 

“I try my best.” Varric took the compliment and bowed.

"How'd they end up together? I thought Fenris hated mages? Did you lie about that too?"

"No, that part is true. I definitely didn't lie about that"

"So what happened? Out of everyone, why did Anders end up with Fenris, the mage hating elf?" 

Varric shrugged helplessly at the question

Compared to Hawke and Isabela, heck, even compared to Aveline with Donnic, Fenris and Anders were less outwardly affectionate. What they had was...quiet. Subtle. They didn't hold hands or kiss in public; at gatherings, it was rare for them to be seen sitting next to each other. For a long time, Varric doubted the validity of their relationship.

"To tell the truth, I don't know when they started. How they met, and how much they hated each others' guts, that part in the book was true. Day in and day out, they fought all the damn time. But then one day, it all stopped. Poof, no more fighting. When we noticed and asked what happened, why were they suddenly civil to each other, they told us they were in love. Ha, in love, can you believe it? Because we certainly didn't. We thought it was a joke they were trying to pull on us."

"Anders and Fenris didn't say anything. They didn't try to correct us or prove a point." Varric walked off and poured himself a drink. He realized he couldn't do this sober. Not that their story was difficult to tell, but if you ever read "Swords and Shield", you'd know love stories weren't his strong suit. He knocked back a shot of whiskey, shuddering as the alcohol burned a trail down his throat.

"I consider myself an observant man- have to be in my line of work- but when it came to Anders and Fenris, I was blind. I doubted them for a while. I made bets with Hawke and the others about if they were real or fake; how long they'll keep up the act. You know, those sort of asshole shit. It went on for months."

"But then one day, Hawke asked a few of us to go with her to Sundermount for some 'bandit looting' as she calls it. The group included Rivani, me... and the two angry glow sticks." Varric poured himself another glass of whisky. He thought about drinking it, but then decided against it. He pushed the glass aside, and turned back to face the Inquisitor. "See, the thing was, after seeing how much Fenris and Anders fought whenever they were together, Hawke made it a rule to separate the two. If Fenris was there, Anders wasn't, and vice versa. That worked out for the most part. Kept the peace in the group. So when Hawke changed it up, Isabela and I raised our eyebrows at the combination, but we guessed she had her reasons. Maybe it was a test, or maybe she forgot, but Fenris and Anders were brought along together this time."

"I thought they'd begin fighting as soon as we left Kirkwall. The jig was up. But to our surprise, Anders didn't bring up mage rights, and Fenris didn't say a word about blood magic. He could've too. We fought some maleficars at the bandit camp. It would've been easy for him to score some points against Anders, and if this was the old Fenris, he would've rub it in Anders' face, telling him this was the reason mages deserved to be imprisoned in Circles. None of that happened though. After the fight, and as Hawke was looting the bodies, I saw Fenris walk up to Anders. They didn't say a word. Instead, Fenris brushed the back of his hand against Anders', and in return Anders offered him back a reassuring smile."

"And that was when you knew they were serious about each other?" Trevelyan asked.

Varric sat back down next to the Inquisitor. He groaned as his knees creaked from old age. "I wish I could say that, kid. I only realized the importance of what they did in hindsight," he said, "It was on our way back to Kirkwall when it dawned on me, on all of us, that they were serious and wasn't faking their relationship at all."

"It was getting dark in Sundermount. No way we could get back to Kirkwall in time, so we decided to set up camp. The tents were up, the bed rolls were out, and Anders was knocked out like a bronto. He was drained of mana and needed to recuperate. The rest of us- Hawke, Isabela, Fenris, and I- sat by the fire, enjoying our meager meals and exchanging juicy gossip. Isabela was in the middle of telling us how she swindled a man out of his trousers when we heard a loud thundering noise. For a heartbeat, we thought it might've been a wyvern, or even a dragon. But no, it turned out to be just Anders. He snored while he slept. And boy was it loud. It's not an exaggeration to say the trees shook and the ground rumbled when he snored. Okay, okay, I might be exaggerating. I'm a storyteller, it's my job to exaggerate. " Varric lifted his hands up in surrender when Trevelyan gave him a skeptical look.

"My point is, Anders made a ruckus. Isabela suggested we stuff a cloth inside Anders' mouth, but Hawke decided to go with a more diplomatic route. She wanted to wake Anders. When she got up to shake Anders' awake, Fenris grabbed her by the wrist and stopped her. 'Don't wake him. He rarely falls into deep sleep because the nightmares. He needs the rest,' he said. Hawke asked what were they going to do then? The noise was bound to attract something nasty."

"To our surprise, Fenris tiptoed to where Anders slept, and placed a gentle hand on his cheek. Slowly, he turned Anders' head until his airway aligned, and immediately, the snoring stopped. We were stunned. The one act alone, showed us how close they were to one another." Remembering the way Fenris tenderly stared at Anders' sleeping face, Varric scratched his cheek out of awkwardness. "I was struck by the difference I saw in Fenris. He looked younger and happier than I'd ever seen him. Carefree, in fact, with a relaxed smile on his lips. When Anders stirred, disturbed by the sound of our voices, Fenris bent his head to soothe him with a soft murmur of his voice."

"I've seen some shit. Bartrand wasn't a saint, and I've walked in on Hawke and Isabela plenty of times. But for some reason seeing Fenris unguarded, his expression tender and vulnerable...it was unspeakably intimate. Hawke, Isabela, and I- we all blushed. We turned our gaze and gave them their privacy. I realized something that day..."

"What?" Trevelyan asked when Varric didn't continue. "What did you realize?"

"I realized, even though Anders' and Fenris' love was less demonstrative than those of Hawke's and Isabela's, a mysterious and passionate intensity existed between them. Once I knew where to look, it was obvious. So when I decided to write the 'The Tale of the Champion', I wanted to respect their privacy. It was the least I could do."

"Where are they now?" Trevelyan asked. "Are they still together? Are they happy?"

Varric shrugged. "The last I heard, they were together near the Tevinter border, hunting and killing slavers. The letter I last received was from Fenris by the way. His letter was short and succinct, but yes, they sounded happy."

Trevelyan smiled. He threw his arms around Varric and gave him a tight hug. "Thank you for telling me, Varric. I feel like I got a whole new perspective of my hero. Yeah, I'm sad he's taken, but at least it sounds like he's with a great guy that loves him."

Varric laughed, tapping at the Inquisitor's arms to let go. "Anytime kid. You want to hear more about Anders, I've got you covered."

"Actually...I do have another question."

"What is it?"

"So about Orsino, did he really turn into a 5 armed blob monster?" 

"Alright, that's it." Varric stood from his chair and shoved the laughing Trevelyan towards the door. "Enough questions for the day. Goodnight, Your Inquisitoralness."

A/n: This is based off a prompt I wrote back in Feb 2017. Finally got a chance to write it out. Like I said.......it takes me a long time to get to prompts/requests....

[griffinnblake]

Season 5 Finale Thoughts

Well, I kinda slept, so here we go.

I let out a lot of frustration with Season 5 under the cut, so if you’re a positive person or enjoyed it, then you might just want to skip this one.

Seriously, this is my opinion, and I don’t want to bring people down, but I also have to be honest with myself and the way I’m feeling.

Still here?

Okay, I’m going to divide this into The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.

The Good:

The last whole scene once Bellarke wakes up from cryo

The last scene of the episode? Perfect. I loved the moment when Clarke went over to Bellamy as he was waking up. I loved how they chose not to put their jackets back on (please please please get rid of the Clarke shoulder pads jacket next season please) and instead were just in the tank top and henley. I loved that once they went on the bridge, they didn’t even have to say much. I loved how emotional they got because of Marper. I loved the callback to last season’s finale, but instead of Bellamy by himself at the window, he now had Clarke by his side. Visually, that ending shot was stunning. I can’t complain there. I see why people say that this could have served as a series finale. It just works.

Marper saving the day

Favorite part of the episode, hands down. The fact that Monty and Harper got their happy ending in a show like this is both mind-boggling and so satisfactory. They proved that you can choose to be good, you can choose to do the right thing. They lived out the rest of their days in peace. They had a son. They saved everyone. 

Their deaths hurt because they were two of the original delinquents, but I couldn’t have asked for a better ending to their story. RIP Monty and Harper. You did good.

Jordan Jasper Green

I mean, look at this face:

AND the fact that he’s named after my son, Jasper...enough said.

I was so excited when he showed up, and when he said “mom and dad” I might have squealed a bit. Monty and Harper live on through their son, and I couldn’t be happier.

Diyoza survived

I seriously thought that she was going to die, and it was a pleasant surprise that she survived. I grew to love her character and hope that she will have more scenes with characters other than just Kane next season.

Bellamy finds out about the radio calls**

I honestly didn’t think they would ever address them. I figured it would just be a dropped plot point like so many other things. I’m glad I was wrong. However, I’ve asterisked this because of what follows. 

The Bad:

Bellamy finds out about the radio calls

Maybe it’s just me, but I found the moment to be lacking. And I know that they literally had no time, but I felt like it deserved more time. Clarke called him for 2,199 days. That’s a ton of calls. And to me, it felt like a throwaway line. An “oh by the way, this happened, but also we gotta go.” And then they don’t really talk about it before going into cryo. I just felt like it was a missed opportunity.

B/E is still a thing

Wow, Lindsay. You’re only putting this into the bad and not the ugly category? Yep. AS MUCH AS IT PISSES ME OFF, they had no time during that episode to even remotely have a chance to break up. If nothing, they were stronger than ever. And that’s why it’s bad for me.

Look, y’all KNOW how I feel about them. It’s been the worst part of this season for me. I can’t find myself to enjoy other parts because it continues to hang over my head. And I hate how they blatantly set up basic foreshadowing at the beginning of the season that things were not going to change on the ground. Yet things...didn’t change on the ground. Congratulations, you just stated facts.

Honestly, what was the point of romantic B/E? Besides setting up potentially romantic Bellarke (which I’ll address in a bit), what was the purpose? I see nothing in the season that would’ve changed if they had been family instead. And considering that was Bellamy’s favorite word in the second half of the season, I would’ve bought it more.

I’m not going to rant about B/E anymore in this post. That would take way too long. But the fact that they are still in a relationship going into season 6 does not bode well for my chances at watching the new season.

The Ugly:

The Flame is still a thing

If there is one thing, ONE THING, I would love to axe in this show, it would be the flame and the title of commander. I absolutely LOATHE it. It’s gotten to the point where it’s such a repetitive storyline that I can’t take it seriously. They use the flame for whatever they need it to be in that moment. Oh, it gives out memories of the old commanders? Okay. It gives the commander strategies on how to win wars? Great. It ends up controlling the host and turns them into basically a robot? FANTASTIC. 

I cannot express into words how much I want that thing gone. And the fact that Jason seems to love the flame more than ever makes me believe that it’s not going anywhere. It was fine at the beginning. I loved the reveal in 3x07 and thought it was super cool. But that was season 3. We’re heading into season 6, and there’s no end to the flame in sight.

For me, this might just be a personal preference, but I couldn’t care less about grounder culture. I signed up for a show about the delinquents, you know, the 100. The title of the show. I know the flame interests some people, but it just doesn’t interest me. 

They saved everyone

Now, before you come at me with your pitchforks, no I am not upset that they saved all your favs. I’m frustrated because the cast of characters has become way too big. There is simply not enough time to focus on all of them, and the characters suffer as a result. The only way to fix this in my mind is to cut the cast. Honestly, they could’ve cut the cast by at least half and I would’ve been fine. But here we are. 

The bait/destruction of Bellarke

Now I know that some of you are going to disagree with me here, so just keep that in mind.

I’m just sitting here laughing at myself because I can’t think of a single scene between Bellamy and Clarke this season where it wasn’t interrupted/about someone else/regurgitating lines from previous seasons. I mean, did they end up talking about something substantial AT ALL? 

I know that they claim that the issues from this season will be addressed in season 6, but it’s hard for me to believe that when for seasons now, this show has been about plot plot plot. Excuse me if I have a hard time trusting the writers when they have stripped everything I love about Bellarke’s relationship away. I barely even recognize them anymore.

ALSO, can someone PLEASE tell me what was the point of “hostage taker and his girlfriend,” of “traitor who you LOVE,” of blurring out B/E kissing and focusing on Clarke’s reactions? What was the purpose of ANY of these things if they weren’t going to be addressed? And again, they claim they’ll be addressed next season. That’s like 9 months away. I have 9 months for these to fester in the back of my mind. I have 9 months to decide if I’m even coming back to  watch that season.

And finally, the article. THE ARTICLE. I know I know, I try to avoid any and all things Jason says, but it’s kinda hard when it’s retweeted and reblogged a million times, not to mention the fact that my sister brought it to my attention the minute I got home last night. And I’m sorry y’all. I just CANNOT ignore it this time. 

Jason basically gave a huge finger to the Bellarke fandom. He said in so many words that he does not plan on making Bellarke canon DESPITE all the romantic hints he’s thrown in the show. He sees a platonic relationship between the two leads as “progressive,” “unique,” “edgy” for lack of better words. He truly can’t see beyond his own ego that it wouldn’t be cliche for Bellamy and Clarke to pursue a romantic relationship. He is so desperate to be “different” that he’s sacrificing the core of his show.

There is no organic way for Bellarke to go other than romantic, and instead of leaning into it, he separates them for episodes at a time, and then gives them no substance when they’re together. Like, I’m sorry, but it’s ridiculous. 

I don’t think I’ve ever felt so frustrated about a ship in my life. Okay scratch that. I think the last ship I felt like this was Zutara, and it took me a LONG time to accept that. And I think, for me at least, as someone who wants Bellarke to be canon and is no longer satisfied with what we have, they have to give me reasons to stick around.

Take One Tree Hill, for example (it’s not the best comparison but it’s the one I can think of at the moment). In season 5, there was a time jump, and Lucas came back dating this girl, Lindsey. It had a lot of similar elements to B/E. Started off-screen, showed reactions of lead female to said ship, storytelling elements that alluded to a break up, etc. What made this situation different however, is that we were given romantic moments with Lucas and Peyton before the time jump and before this offscreen relationship came to be. I had scenes of Lucas and Peyton being explicitly romantic to tide me over until Lucas and Lindsey eventually broke up.

We have none of that with Bellarke. I know some people are going to claim we do, but for me, it’s not enough anymore. If I had even ONE explicitly romantic scene between Bellarke, I’d be in a totally different camp. It doesn’t even have to be a kiss or sex. If it were an almost-kiss, a confession, SOMETHING, it would tide me over. But as it stands, I have nothing to hold onto. And I’m sorry, but season 5 gave me nothing.

At this point in time, I’ve realized that my main reason for watching is Bellarke (and the delinquents). It just is. And I know that people always say that you can’t just watch a show for a ship, but I can’t help it. They were the most interesting part for me, and yes, I do feel disappointed. It comes down to the fact that I don’t see Bellarke becoming romantic anytime soon, and now there’s only a handful of delinquents left. I have to ask myself, is that enough for me?

And right now, I can’t say that it is.

I have months and months to think about it. Honestly, it needs to go on the back burner for now. I just found out that I have 89 lovely sophomores signed up for WHAP this year. And since we’ll be writing every week, that means I have 89 essays a week to grade 😳. If I can make it to the time season 6 airs, it’ll be a miracle.

I’m sorry that this is such a rambling mess. I couldn’t sleep well last night because I had so many thoughts running through my head. I hope I explained myself well enough, and I hope that you won’t look down on me for it. I would LOVE to be where y’all are at and completely love the finale, but I just can’t right now.

If you made it this far, thank you.

[smoljohnlock]

THE FINAL PROBLEM (PART 1)

“May be the hardest case of your career” 

1. THE GREAT GAME

JIM: D’you know what happens if you don’t leave me alone, Sherlock, to you? SHERLOCK: Oh, let me guess: I get killed. JIM: Kill you? N-no, don’t be obvious. I mean, I’m gonna kill you anyway some day. I don’t wanna rush it, though. I’m saving it up for something special. No-no-no-no-no. If you don’t stop prying, I’ll burn you. I’ll burn the heart out of you. SHERLOCK: I have been reliably informed that I don’t have one. JIM: But we both know that’s not quite true.

2. A SCANDAL IN BELGRAVIA

Making Sherlock aware of John’s feelings for him & making John jealous. So The Fall will have a bigger emotional impact on them.

IRENE: And somebody loves you. If I had to punch that face, I'd avoid your nose and teeth too.

IRENE: The key-code to my safe. JOHN: What was it? IRENE: Shall I tell him? My measurements.

You quote the whole episode but the Battersea scene is the key here (the conversation between John and Irene which Sherlock eavesdrops)

SHERLOCK: Oh, you’re rather good. IRENE: You’re not so bad.   JOHN: John Hamish Watson – just if you were looking for baby names.

(Sherlock’s monologue shows him opinion on love at that point but it’ll also be important later on) SHERLOCK: I imagine John Watson thinks love’s a mystery to me but the chemistry is incredibly simple, and very destructive. When we first met, you told me that disguise is always a self-portrait. How true of you: the combination to your safe – your measurements; but this is far more intimate. This is your heart and you should never let it rule your head. You could have chosen any random number and walked out of here today with everything you’ve worked for but you just couldn’t resist it, could you?  I’ve always assumed that love is a dangerous disadvantage... Thank you for the final proof. 

3. THE REICHENBACH FALL

SHERLOCK: So how’re you going to do it ... burn me?  JIM: Oh, that’s the problem – the final problem. Have you worked out what it is yet? What’s the final problem? I did tell you... but did you listen? How hard do you find it, having to say “I don’t know”?   SHERLOCK: I don’t know.  JIM: Oh, that’s clever; that’s very clever; awfully clever. 

Okay, let’s stop here for a minute... Sherlock geniuely didn’t know what The Final Problem was, and he didn’t even get it on the roof (SH to Jim: I am you. Prepared to do anything. Prepared to burn.), distracted by the ‘code’ and Jim’s fairytale stories. The suicide was exactly what Moriarty wanted, because TFP was all about the consequences of Sherlock’s ‘death’.

“What’s the final problem? I did tell you... but did you listen?”

Back to TGG:  I’ll burn the heart out of you. SHERLOCK: I have been reliably informed that I don’t have one. JIM: But we both know that’s not quite true.

The heart is John Watson. Jim’s (or Mycroft’s really, but I’m not gonna get into that here) plan was to break John. By ‘killing’ himself Sherlock saved his friends. But.. did he really?

JOHN:  You ... you told me once that you weren’t a hero. There were times I didn’t even think you were human, but let me tell you this: you were the best man, and the most human ... human being that I’ve ever known and no-one will ever convince me that you told me a lie, and so ... There. I was so alone, and I owe you so much. No, please, there’s just one more thing, mate, one more thing: one more miracle, Sherlock, for me. Don’t ... be ... dead. Would you do ...? Just for me, just stop it. (He gestures down at the grave.) Stop this.

4. THE EMPTY HEARSE & THE SIGN OF 3

John trapped in an unhappy relationship with Mary, pining for Sherlock

I’ll burn the heart of out you... literally.

MARY: Oh my God, oh my God. Do you have any idea what you’ve done to him? SHERLOCK: Okay, John, I’m suddenly realising I probably owe you some sort of an apology. JOHN (in a whisper): Two years. I thought ... (He groans, unable to continue and gesturing helplessly. Mary stares at him in sympathy. John finally straightens and turns to Sherlock.) JOHN: I thought ... you were dead. Now, you let me grieve, hmm? How could you do that? How?

In TEH, Sherlock still hasn’t figured it out. He accuses John of overreacting and plays a trick on him to force forgiveness. Although the realization of all the pain he put John through starts to slowly sink in.

The wedding, both John and Sherlock pining for each other, Mary stands in the way. There’s no hope for Sherlock to be with John anymore, even though he wants to.

MRS HUDSON: I remember she left early. I mean, who leaves a wedding early? So sad. 

(He walks through his bedroom to his wardrobe, where a morning suit is hanging from the open door. He looks at it.) SHERLOCK: Into battle.

SHERLOCK: Ah, that’s why he’s bouncing round him like a puppy. MARY: Oh, Sherlock! Neither of us were the first, you know.

MYCROFT: Oh, by the way, Sherlock – do you remember Redbeard? SHERLOCK: I’m not a child any more, Mycroft. MYCROFT: No, of course you’re not. Enjoy not getting involved, Sherlock. 

Just... the whole episode, It’s all p a i n

5. HIS LAST VOW

John’s just back from the honeymoon, already missing Sherlock. Sherlock finds relief in drugs, sells John a lie it was for a case. In TRF, Moriarty talks about pressure points, so does Magnussen in HLV.

MAGNUSSEN: Very hard to find a pressure point on you, Mr Holmes. The drugs thing I never believed for a moment. Anyway, you wouldn’t care if it was exposed, would you? But look how you care about John Watson. Your damsel in distress. JOHN: You put me in a fire... for leverage? MAGNUSSEN: Oh, I’d never let you burn, Doctor Watson. I had people standing by. MAGNUSSEN: I’m not a murderer ... unlike your wife.

(In S4, Mary is a mirror for Sherlock. If you think S3 is EMP as well, you could say Mary is a mirror here, as well)

Mary shoots Sherlock. Forwards or backwards? Backwards. So from now on, we’re going through everything that has happened before.

6 .THE ABOMINABLE BRIDE

This episode is extremely important, because Sherlock finally realises what’s The Final Problem, then S4 is solving it. 

In TAB, Sherlock tries to figure out how Moriarty survived and what happened on the roof. (Funny thing is, we’ve got three final problems in BBC Sherlock - TRF, TAB and TFP. Proof that it’s what Sherlock is still working on)

HOLMES: Gun in the mouth; a bullet through the brain; back of the head blown clean off. How could he survive?

Deep waters, going deeper into his mind (will be important in S4)

I shall have to go deep. Into What? Myself.

These are deep waters, Watson, deep waters. And I shall have to go deeper still.

You're in deep, Sherlock, deeper than you ever intended to be.

H: Still not awake, am I? Moriarty: Too deep, Sherlock, way too deep. Congratulations, you will be the first man in history to be buried in his own Mind Palace.

MORIARTY: This is how we end, you and I. Always here, always together. HOLMES: You have a magnificent brain, Moriarty. I admire it. I concede it may be even be the equal of my own. MORIARTY: I’m touched. I’m honoured. HOLMES: But when it comes to the matter of unarmed combat on the edge of a precipice you’re going in the water short-arse. MORIARTY: Oh, you think you’re so big and strong, Sherlock! Not with me! I am your WEAKNESS! I keep you DOWN! Every time you STUMBLE, every time you FAIL, when you’re WEAK ...: I ... AM ... THERE! No. Don’t try to fight it. LIE BACK AND LOSE! Shall we go over together? It has to be together, doesn’t it? At the end, it’s always just you ... AND ME! WATSON: Professor, if you wouldn’t mind stepping away from my friend. I do believe he finds your attention a shade annoying. MORIARTY: That’s not fair. There’s two of you! WATSON: There’s always two of us. Don’t you read The Strand?

What’s different here is that John saves Sherlock, rather than Sherlock being like ‘alone protects me’. Sherlock should have trusted John in TRF. He finally gets it. And we get this beautiful moment:

HOLMES: Thank you, John. WATSON: Since when do you call me John? HOLMES: You’d be surprised. WATSON: No I wouldn’t.  Time you woke up, Sherlock. I’m a storyteller. I know when I’m in one. HOLMES: Of course. Of course you do, John. WATSON: So what’s he like? The other me, in the other place? HOLMES: Smarter than he looks. WATSON: Pretty damned smart, then. HOLMES (smiling): Pretty damned smart.

This is a huge turn, because from now in Sherlock will be aware of the consequences of TRF and what it did to John, then he’ll solve The Final Problem.

7. THE SIX THATCHERS

There are so many parallels in S4 not because the writers are ‘lazy’ but because Sherlock’s going ‘backwards’. Lemme bring a few lines from TAB: 1. MORIARTY: Is this silly enough for you yet? Gothic enough? Mad enough, even for you? It doesn’t make sense, Sherlock, because it’s not real. None of it. This is all in your mind. 2. MORIARTY: Doesn’t it remind you of another case? Hasn’t this all happened before? There’s nothing new under the sun. What was it?

Btw, I listed the deep waters quotes form TAB. Now think about water in S4.

S4 is just a cont. of TAB.

What’s important in S4 is that Mary is a Sherlock mirror.

MARY: My darling. I need to tell you this because you mustn’t hate me for going away. I gave myself permission to have an ordinary life. I’m not running. I promise you that. I just need to do this in my own way. but I don’t want you and Sherlock hanging off my gun arm. I’m sorry, my love. I know you’ll try to find me, but there is no point. Every move is random and not even Sherlock Holmes can anticipate the roll of a dice. I need to move the target far, far away from you and Rosie, and then I’ll come back, my darling. I swear I will.

Isn’t it familiar...? Yes, this is a reference to Sherlock hiding after TRF. Many Happy Returns. Just replace ‘you and Sherlock’ with ‘you, Mrs Hudson and Lestrade’.

MARY: I didn’t know what else to do. JOHN: You could have stayed. You could have talked to me. That’s what couples are supposed to do: work things through. MARY:  Yes, of course. JOHN: Mary, I may not be a very good man, but I think I’m a bit better than you give me credit for, most of the time. MARY: All the time. You’re always a good man, John. I’ve never doubted that. You never judge; you never complain. I don’t deserve you.  All I ever wanted to do was keep you and Rosie safe, that’s all.

Sherlock’s trying to untangle the mess he’s done.

SHERLOCK: What did you hear, Ajay? When you were a prisoner, what exactly did you hear? AJAY: What did I hear? Ammo. Every day as they tore into me. Ammo. Ammo.  Ammo.

SHERLOCK: How’s your Latin, brother dear? MYCROFT: My Latin? SHERLOCK: Amo, amas, amat. MYCROFT: I love, you love, he loves.

Sherlock tortured by love/thinking of John when in Serbia...

NORBURY killed Sherlock Mary

SHERLOCK: If you ever think I’m becoming a bit full of myself, cocky or over-confident would you just say the word ‘Norbury’ to me, would you?

Wasn’t he cocky and over-confident on the roof? He definitely was and as it turned out, he had no idea what he was doing. Idk about you, but I’m amazed at the character development.

Sherlock Mary dies - and it breaks John.

Sherlock asks Ella for help: I need to know what to do about John.

He finds a CD - MISS ME? 

I’m giving you a case, Sherlock. When I’m gone – if I’m gone – I need you to do something for me. Save John Watson. Save him, Sherlock. Save him.

--------------------------

I’ll post the second part as soon as I have some free time & energy. Didn’t want to squeeze everything into one post, because it’s too long anyway. I didn’t reread it, so sorry for all the mistakes. Transcripts x

[brakken]

I finished Life is Strange: Before the Storm Episode 3.

Thoughts below the cut...

-spoilers for Before the Storm and Life is Strange-

In a lot of ways, it was very close.

I think Deck Nine have done an incredible job with telling a story that essentially didn’t need to be told.  I appreciate the effort and dedication to make it feel like the same Arcadia Bay we’re familiar with. I love that it’s embellished further in some places, even when it’s just hinting at something. I’m truly grateful for some of the ways that Before the Storm has augmented its predecessor. And I’d like to give HUGE praise to Rhianna Devries for delivering a great performance as Chloe.

There is a lot to like in this game - though I think it became weaker with each episode.

The main plot pieces of the previous episodes rely a bit on their promise of a big payoff, and that sadly isn’t here in ep. 3. In the first episode’s ending, the mystery woman sits and smiles as a wildfire blazes. Mid-ep. 2, she exits Frank’s van, turns, and gives Chloe an unsympathetic look. By the end of that episode, she’s revealed to be Rachel’s birth mother, and when we discover her backstory in ep. 3, we find out she’s a recovering addict and just wants to meet her daughter. All these elements, to me, were speaking of a deeper conclusion than what we got. We’ve seen fragments of a manipulative nature in Rachel - how much of that is an inherited trait? What was Sera’s involvement with Damon and Frank if she claimed to be sober? Where was all this leading to?

When we finally encounter her properly, she’s a damsel for us to rescue, and when we converse, she’s only used to re-affirm the father’s plea - to cast more immediate doubt onto the final choice. I didn’t see the ending where she reunites with Rachel, but I saw that the timestamp on youtube puts it at 48 seconds of content, so I can’t imagine she’s elaborated on much, there.

It’s a shame because I think there was a lot of strong storytelling being done on the Rachel angle, and I felt that having a plot that wasn’t too connected to the original game was the right move. But all-in-all it pulled too much focus away from Chloe.

I’ve talked about why I was finding choices difficult in this prequel. How I felt conflicted about what Chloe would do, vs what I thought was best for her, vs where I knew the story would eventually end up. The final choice echoed this, too. In an odd way I found this one more difficult than the final choice of LiS. There, I knew there was no way I’d let go of Chloe. But here, even though the consequences were less severe (read: void, since we know it changes nothing), I still found it tricky. The story had been leaning very heavily on protecting Rachel from the truth in this episode, to the point where it practically seemed unavoidable. I remembered Chloe’s graffiti from the original game: ‘everybody lies, no exceptions’. I pondered on Chloe’s insecurities and inability to face hard truths. So I picked the lie.

And then I immediately remembered how hurt Chloe is when she discovers Rachel had been in a secret relationship with Frank. How she trusted Rachel with everything and no-one else. How isolated they both were. I sat with my decision and watched those events play out, while already planning to replay the whole episode just to alter my final choice.

Which I did. And while I felt picking the truth was in line with my version of Chloe, I was let down by the ending. I was let down when everything played out almost exactly the same.

There was a lot of hubbub about the first game’s ending - receiving criticism for not taking your choices throughout into account. While I understand the sentiment, this wasn’t a huge factor for my opinion on the final choice. What I appreciated about it (compared to games like The Walking Dead S1, and The Wolf Among Us) was that the endings were notably different from one another. This style of game seems built on choices that are arguably meaningless, but Life is Strange gave us one that mattered - a final branched path.

Before the Storm clearly took the criticism of the first game in mind and tried to craft the endings to avoid that. But in doing so, it became an ending with even less meaning, at least for me. Instead of the final choice leading down severely different roads, all it changes is how the closing montage begins. Does Rachel sit with her family, happy but oblivious? Or do her parents argue and punish themselves for her learning the truth? The rest of the montage scenes are either unchanged or specific only to earlier choices. It left me unsatisfied because it turned it all into one grey ending. It became the end of an episode, not the end of the full game. It made me feel like the final, most important decision was just one more yes/no option.

I get why it’s like this, and I get why from a production standpoint, any more nuance wouldn’t be feasible. But I wish there had been something more to both decisions. I think it’s really great that there is an epilogue for each of the smaller stories, that change depending on how you played them. But they need to be second-tier to Chloe and Rachel’s epilogue - all of which remained the same, save for the beginning.

I would have liked to see a callback to the wildfire, somehow. There’s a moment in the hospital where a firefighter mentions that it simply put itself out. Another small hint to the supernatural aspect of Rachel. I loved all these little hints, and I loved that they never trespassed too far over canon or over Chloe’s journey. But to better solidify the different endings, maybe it could have been played with more. If you tell Rachel the truth, the fire surges up again from her torment. And if you lie, it extinguishes fully, calmed by her ignorance, maybe we see some green returning to the park... or maybe it’s put out by a sudden onset of rain. The fire is over, but the storm is coming.

I’ve been trying to think what I would change about this game, even in small ways, that would make it overall a stronger piece of LiS story. I think I would have given Frank’s role to someone else - probably someone new. A few of the reappearing characters from the first game felt forced in solely because we knew they were familiar with Chloe before she reunited with Max, and while I appreciate the attempt to have Frank break out of that cameo feeling, I actually think he would have been better off on the sidelines. His portrayal in this feels inconsistent and uncharacteristic to how we meet him in the original. Here, he protects Chloe from a villain with a knife, while in his first scene in LiS, he pulls a knife on her. I think if they’d kept Frank in the margins, with more of that drug dealer presence, and given his role to, say, Thunder the bouncer, or even someone entirely new, the narrative would have been stronger. It would allow them to keep Frank true to Chloe’s later opinion of him, and also keep the players guessing as to the fate of this new character. There’s no threat when Frank is grappling with Damon because we know he survives. But with someone different, heck, maybe if you choose badly then they are actually put in danger.

I’m don’t like looking at this as an alternate timeline - I think that’s sorta unfair to Max’s role and influence on the story. So as far as recurring characters go, I think Joyce and David are used the best, both in consistent portrayal and how they affect Chloe here. 

Due in part to their indeterminate fate, I think it’s BtS’s original characters that stand out most for me. I had a lot of fun interacting with Steph and Mikey, and figuring out how to handle the Drew situation. Skip’s story was cute, and it was cool to see Samantha involved with a pre-established character. Just a shame that most of this was sidestory stuff or inconsequential.

I’m glad they took Eliot in a different direction from Warren, though I’m not really sure what it was they wanted, there. A consistent theme in the game is the subtle and sometimes overt ways that Rachel manipulates people to get what she wants, and how Chloe’s regard for her is potentially hurting as much as it is healing. Eliot confronts Chloe about this directly, but it soon spirals into his ulterior motives and he becomes a threat. While I thought this was consistent with the way he’d been portrayed in earlier segments, and I understand that villainising that opinion works to delude Chloe further - I also wonder if it would have been more interesting to have Eliot genuinely concerned for her safety. I wonder what sort of player choices we would be given in that situation, and if the developers could still have convinced us to side with Rachel.

I think setting this story over three days was a mistake. I had this same feeling in the first game, but the reason it worked there was because Max and Chloe were reuniting. There were years of backstory that were coming up to the surface in that short week, and so all the events, all the emotions, had that much extra weight and believability because of it. Rachel and Chloe however, are meeting essentially for the first time, and their budding connection feels rushed over the course of BtS - culminating in Chloe making life-changing decisions for Rachel and risking her own life on day three of knowing her. Maybe it was intentional - maybe this was to exemplify the irresistible magnetism of Rachel. But I still think if it had been set over three weeks or even three months, there’d be more room to accommodate the relationship. As it stands, it’s all too close to Max and Chloe, with none of the history that makes it effective.

The post-credits sting just felt... mean. And not in a clever, foreboding way. If they wanted to close out with a reminder of where the story goes, they could do it with rumbling thunder, or a rain cloud off the coast of the lighthouse. Because this game wasn’t called ‘Life is Strange: Before Rachel Gets Kidnapped and Killed’. Rachel was more than her fate, and so was the original game. That ending put me back in the worst place that the first game takes you, and that just upset me.

I’m... not actually sure what Life is Strange is without Max. Maybe that’s why this game felt like it couldn’t ever truly hit the mark for me, even with my grievances over the original. Even though it was a game about saving Chloe, LiS was all told through Max’s lens - often literally. The parts of BtS that I was latching onto most were those that mentioned her. Chloe’s journal, her old texts, the dream segments...

And while I’m on that subject - I felt the metaphors got a bit confusing in this episode. My understanding of William’s dialogue in ep.2′s dream segment was a warning of the burning passion Chloe felt for Rachel (the fire), and a promise of the stronger connection to come with Max (the stars). Yet in ep.3, stars are also connected to Rachel, making her the storm, the fire, and the night sky. I just... felt like we lost a bit of focus there, or maybe I just interpreted it wrong. And was the Raven kinda absent from most of this ep?

I’ve been considering doing another full playthrough to see if anything becomes clearer, this time with all different choices (something I found impossible in the original LiS). We’ll see. I’ll let it rest for now, and see what ‘Farewell’ brings.

Even with all my hangups about both games, it’s always a shame to leave that world. There’s so much I love about it just on sensory levels.

My favourite moments from this episode were:

-Sera’s backstory. Loved the callback to the viewfinder.

-Playing tabletop again. I teared up when the story began reflecting the LiS ending.

-Seeing Chloe happy, even if it’s temporary.

Deck Nine pulled the weight with this game. While I’d predicted I would come away conflicted no matter what, I’m still thankful for the parts that they got right.

Wishing and hoping for great things to come.

As always, thank you to anyone who took the time to read these thoughts. Here’s a drawing <3

[the-desolated-quill]

Black Panther - Quill’s Quickies (No Spoilers)

Going into this movie, I had mixed feelings to say the least. On the one hand, I was excited because we’re finally getting a Black Panther movie. I read some of the comics when I was younger and remember really enjoying them, plus the character was one of the best things about Captain American: Civil War. On the other hand, I was a little apprehensive because... well... it’s a fucking Marvel movie.

It’s no secret how much I’ve grown to dislike the Marvel Cinematic Universe over the years due to how homogenised and formulaic their films and TV shows have become. I thought Marvel’s offerings last year in particular were pretty dire. Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 I personally thought was about as entertaining as tripping over and breaking your jaw on a doorframe, Spider-Man Homecoming has got to be one of the most shallow and vapid movies I think I’ve ever experienced, Iron Fist was a boring and convoluted mess, The Defenders was a total waste of time containing more padding then a king-size mattress, and The Punisher I basically just lost interest in about halfway through.

In my opinion, Marvel has become a giant soulless sequel factory, churning out more and more mediocre crap as if it were on a conveyor belt rather than actually putting in the effort to create content people might actually want to see (I mean seriously, who the fuck is actually interested in Ant-Man And The Wasp? The most positive thing I’ve ever heard anyone say about the first movie was ‘meh, the shrinking scenes were okay, i guess’). Not to mention all the other shady and bigoted bullshit that goes on behind the scenes (coughDoctorStrangecough). So did I have reason to believe they would fuck up Black Panther? Yes, I think so. Which is why it came as an overwhelmingly pleasant surprise to find that not only did they not fuck up Black Panther, but it could also be my new favourite superhero movie of all time.

Let’s not beat around the bush any longer. I LOVE this movie! Hell, I practically worship it! And there are multiple reasons for that. For starters, there’s none of the usual crap you normally get in Marvel movies. No pointless fanwank. No mention of those poxy Infinity Stones or any of that other convoluted rubbish that I’ve long since stopped caring about. While this does continue certain thematic elements and character arcs established in Civil War, Black Panther is largely a standalone entity that works independently from the rest of the MCU clusterfuck. But I think what makes Black Panther stand head and shoulders above the rest of its brethren is that, unlike most recent movies, this one actually has something important and worthwhile to say, and it does it in a very unique, intelligent and compelling way.

I almost feel guilty for not having more faith in Ryan Coogler going into this because he’s done an exceptional job as director. The level of care and attention to detail is truly extraordinary. When I got my first glimpse at Wakanda on the big screen, I gasped. It’s so breathtakingly beautiful. Plus, rather than going down the generic sci-fi route like Guardians Of The Galaxy and Thor have done, Coogler has actually taken the time to really expand and intricately construct this society. This same level of care has also been applied to the characters, who feel like real people as opposed to one dimensional, joke spewing machines (coughAnt-Mancough). You can tell that Coogler and everyone else involved in this film are really passionate about what they’re doing and that they want to give us more than just the standard good vs evil plot we’ve seen done so many times before. Black Panther isn’t your average superhero movie. It’s an introspective character piece that utilises the Afrofuturism sub-genre to explore what it means to be black in the modern world, dealing with themes such as oppression, isolationism, freedom and autonomy.

Chadwick Boseman gives yet another great performance as T’Challa as we see him struggle with his new-found responsibilities as King of Wakanda as well as his residual feelings of grief over his father’s death (without giving away too much, sons trying to live up to fathers’ ideals play a big part in this movie and is quite possibly the main driving force behind the narrative). Martin Freeman and Andy Serkis reprise their roles as Everett K Ross and Ulysses Klaue respectively and give predictably good performances, as does Get Out star Daniel Kaluuya as W’Kabi and Winston Duke as M’Baku.

Do you know what else this film has that most MCU movies don’t? Strong black women! Oh thank the Maker! You’ve got Angela Bassett as T’Challa’s mum Ramonda and Danai Gurira as royal bodyguard Okoye, and both are incredible. Lupita Nyong’o plays Black Panther’s love interest Nakia and she’s brilliant too. She’s not just a prize for the male hero to win at the end. She actually has her own arc and character outside of just being the girlfriend, which is nice. But the breakout star is Letitia Wright as Black Panther’s sister Shuri. What a great role model for black girls! She’s funny, bubbly and insanely clever, crafting a lot of her big brother’s tech. Wright injects so much personality into the part that you can’t help but love her. I hope this film leads to bigger and better things for her in the future because she is truly amazing.

Finally there’s Michael B Jordan as the film’s primary antagonist Erik Killmonger. Now Marvel has always had a bit of a villain problem. Most have been generic, uninspired non-threats that simply aren’t interesting to watch. Killmonger feels like a breath of fresh air. Not only is he not a generic baddie, the film also takes the time to really get to the heart of this character. There are moments where we get to see Killmonger at his most vulnerable and sensitive, and while his actions are both shocking and violent, they come come from a very raw and emotional place. It’s hard for me to really convey why I love this character so much without going into spoilers, but trust me. He is one of the most unique and compelling antagonists ever to come out of the MCU, and Michael B Jordan does an incredible job bringing him to life.

There’s so much I want to talk about, but I really don’t want to spoil the film for you. If you haven’t already, you NEED to watch Black Panther as soon as possible. It’s one of the most powerful and intelligent comic book movies I’ve ever had the pleasure of watching, and the fact that it’s come from Marvel of all places makes it all the more remarkable for me. It reminds me of why I love cinema and storytelling as an art form so much, and I’m so happy that this incredible film has given black people vital and empowering representation in the cinematic landscape as well as providing a much needed voice for them. This is one of the most culturally significant movies ever to come out in recent memory and you’d be a fool to miss it.

[bellblakes]

In defense of Bellamy Blake: A response to this post.

“They took all that growth and development and threw it out of the window.” I firmly believe that the writing in season 3 was racist towards Bellamy. I understand why Bellamy did what he did, but him siding with Pike and the way it was done were undoubtedly bad storytelling. He was villainized to prop up white characters. I’ll elaborate more in the next points.

“The writers didn’t even own up to the horrible choices they made: instead, they tried to salvage the situation by backpedaling on everything and by using every possible cheap or awful device to make Bellamy likable again." Bellamy isn’t the only character to have done bad things, and I really don’t get why he’s the only one who has to be made “likable” again. I have a lot to say about this and how it all ties into racist writing and double standards from the fandom, but, again, I’ll leave to discuss it further in the next points.

“Which means: to save one character, they sacrificed other characters and cohesive writing. Which is why it’s not Season 3 that made me give up on ever liking Bellamy again, it was season 4, the finale in particular. My issue isn’t with the character, it’s with the writing.” This is where I really started to have a problem with your post, and I think it’s an appropriate section to go into detail about the racist writing I mentioned above. It’s funny how perspective works, because to me it’s clear as day that they brought down BELLAMY to prop up other characters (white characters). For starters, it’s exceptionally racist that Bellamy and Pike, a brown and black man respectively, were chosen by the writers as the faces of xenophobia, while white characters were the voices of reason. According to Jason Rothenberg the storyline was supposed to be a commentary on the US post-9/11. Bellamy, Pike and other characters of color were portrayed as violent racists, Clarke, Octavia, Abby and Kane as sensible and peaceful, and white grounders such as Lexa as victims (black grounders, Lincoln and Indra, were actually the worst victims). The show wanted the audience to hate Bellamy and Pike, and root for Clarke, Octavia and Lexa.

“What I want to say is that I don’t think there is anything really wrong with the idea behind Bellamy’s season 3 storyline. Someone who learned to be a hero but suddenly has a fall from grace. There is potential for great storytelling there. But you have to be careful. If you have decided that you are going to put a beloved character in a tricky situation, you have to be meticulous about everything. The base to justify this turn has to be solid, the character’s reasons must be clear and understandable (understanding is different from agreeing with), there has to be a final intent, whether that being character growth or destruction. All this by staying true to the character(s) and maintaining consistency in the storytelling. With Bellamy, the 100 did none of that.” I understand that Bellamy would feel betrayed by grounders after learning to trust and work with them. I understand that Bellamy is impulsive. I understand that Pike manipulated Bellamy while he was vulnerable. To some extent, I even believe that Bellamy wasn’t completely in the wrong, after all grounders attacked the hundred from the moment they landed, and Lexa sent three hundred warriors to kill them in season 1. In the aftermath of the Mount Weather attack, his past experiences with grounders were at the forefront of his mind and he felt guilty and stupid for ever trusting them despite the warning signs. As a highly empathetic person, he saw each of those deaths as if they were personally caused by him. I GET that. I GET that he wanted to do something about it. He’s a protector, and wanted to make sure that nobody would ever get hurt again because of him. But he decided to support Pike after less than a day. He listened to Pike over his friends. He trusted Pike because he felt alone and scared, and Pike was the only one by his side, giving him a purpose. Why do you think the writers kept Raven away from Bellamy? Because if Raven was there, she would bring him back to reality pretty quick and this storyline would never happen. Raven knows pain. She was Gina’s friend. She understands and inspires Bellamy. Raven would never leave him in that moment. This is another instance of bad writing, and characters being out of character or getting removed from the plot altogether to fit the story they want to tell.

“First, they rewrote the narrative and made Bellamy dependent on Clarke to make good decisions, so that his choice to back up Pike would feel more justified because she wasn’t there to be a positive influence.” It’s racist as hell.

“We’re supposed to root for this character, to understand him and justify him and eventually believe in his redemption.” I already said this, but I’ll say it again: this storyline was supposed to reflect the US post-9/11, and Bellamy and Pike were The 100′s equivalent of “racists wanting to kill every brown person in sight”. We absolutely weren’t supposed to root for Bellamy. He was literally portrayed as a villain. He opposed Clarke, the one we should root for, and ruined the peace she and Lexa achieved.

“But the writing is so downright awful and keeps being so ugly that it has ruined the character for me forever, even now that he has undeniably come back onto the right path again in season 4.” Here’s the thing: bad writing can either benefit or damage characters. On The 100, bad writing props up white characters at the expense of characters of color. A good example of this would be Bellamy relying on Clarke to make good decisions. It’s bad writing, but it paints CLARKE in a positive light (capable of rational thinking, superior person and a good influence for her friend), and BELLAMY in a negative light (incapable of rational thinking, inferior person and dependent on his friend). He’s a victim of the racism of the writers.

“You know how this storyline could have worked? If the writers had truly committed to it. Gone all in and portrayed Bellamy’s actions as nothing other than what they were: wrong. You got your fallen hero who fully realizes the consequences of his action and you follow him in his path towards redemption, real redemption.” As I said before, they definitely portrayed his actions as wrong. In fact, I would argue that they went TOO far in villainizing him. I think you’re being unfair. Why do you have to single out Bellamy, when no other character on this show had a good redemption arc? I honestly think you’re holding Bellamy up to higher standards than other characters. Kane was responsible for the culling of three hundred and twenty innocent people, but he felt bad about it, started being a better person from that moment on, and it was okay. Other characters weren’t screaming in his face about every single bad thing he ever did and he didn’t have to beg for anyone’s forgiveness. We barely saw him struggle with his own morality. Octavia has been physically abusive of her loved ones since season 2 (and we should note that the characters she abused, Lincoln, Indra and Bellamy, are all characters of color), and in season 3 she became a killer. The narrative used her hurt and grief to justify her violence. Throughout season 4, Clarke (who was previously a morally ambiguous character, but clearly had good intentions) was straight up evil: She decided that her “friend” Monty didn’t deserve to live, experimented on grounders, left her “friend” Octavia outside the bunker to die, and kidnapped and shot at her “friend” Bellamy. The narrative didn’t even acknowledge that she was wrong. We’re still expected to root for her. We’re supposed to feel SORRY for her, for "having” to make all these hard choices (despite the fact that she fought to be a leader from day one. Clarke LOVES having power). Throughout season 1, Lexa actively tried to wipe out the hundred, and she was never sorry. She never needed redemption from being responsible for the deaths of dozens of teenagers.

“The massacre isn’t shown, we only see the bodies of the people that were killed, because they aren’t what’s important, Bellamy’s shock and pain is what we should focus on, and it would be hard to bring the audience to root for him if we saw him participating in a cold-blooded massacre.” I’m gonna say it, this makes zero sense. Bellamy’s pain is literally the farthest thing from the focus here. Those scenes barely show him. Instead, the focus is on Kane and Abby’s reactions to seeing Pike’s group return, and Octavia, Clarke and Lexa’s reactions to seeing the result of the massacre. They look shocked and horrified. Clarke and Lexa are enjoying the peace they’re bringing to Arkadia together, when their happiness is interrupted by finding the bodies that Bellamy helped kill. We’re supposed to feel for them and be ANGRY at what Bellamy did. The message of those scenes is that everything was okay due to Clarke and Lexa’s hard work, and BELLAMY ruined everything by starting a war. The writers wanted the audience to hate him and sympathize with Kane, Abby, Clarke, Lexa and Octavia, there’s no question about that.

“And then another thing, possibly the worst in my opinion: Bellamy faces no consequences whatsoever.” He got beaten up by his own sister while chained to a rock. No other character has faced a punishment like this. I honestly don’t know what kind of consequences he should face. At this point people wouldn’t be satisfied with anything but his death.

“Conflict isn’t allowed in Bellamy’s storyline because the characters are reduced to expository devices who are there to tell us we Must forgive Bellamy. His redemption doesn’t work because it comes at the expense of other characters and cohesive storytelling.”

“Every single person Bellamy interacts with (with one exception that I’m gonna touch on very soon) either don’t comment on what Bellamy has done (or has been strategically removed from the narrative/episode when they could have been there to stop him, make him change his mind or simply to tell him what he was doing/planning to do was wrong, e.g. Raven being absent in 304) OR they’re extremely understanding and keep repeating that Bellamy is good and he doesn’t have to blame himself and he has to forgive himself. Kane’s words are the most blatant evidence of what the writers are doing. “Turn the page and don’t look back.” Yeah, he’s talking to Bellamy, but most of all, that’s a message for the audience. We’re supposed to turn the page and forget what Bellamy did.” Have you considered the fact that Clarke, Kane and Jaha also struggle with guilt, and by forgiving Bellamy they’re attempting to forgive themselves for the bad things they also did? Clarke still struggles with the Mount Weather genocide, and Kane and Jaha with their decisions on the council. The kill count between Clarke and Bellamy is extremely close (Clarke at 905, and Bellamy at 1,003), and we don’t know how many deaths Kane and Jaha are responsible for, but, as the chancellor and a member of the council, they certainly executed many innocent people. “If you need forgiveness, I’ll give that to you. You’re forgiven.” - Bellamy to Clarke. “You’re not the only one trying to forgive yourself. Maybe we’ll get that someday.” - Clarke to Bellamy. And why is it okay to forget what other characters did, but not what Bellamy did? What is it about his actions that make them worse than the actions of other characters? When Clarke and Lexa kill, their actions are shown as necessary, and the narrative doesn’t hold them accountable. Clarke and Lexa let a bomb drop on Tondc, killing two hundred and fifty people. Abby initially saw Clarke’s actions as wrong, but Kane actually DEFENDED Clarke and Abby ended up agreeing with him: “Because she grew up on the Ark. She learned what to do from us. […] She made a choice. Like executing people for stealing medicine and food. Like sucking the air from the lungs of three hundred parents so they could save their children.” - Kane to Abby. “Like floating the man you love to save your people.” - Abby to Kane. Lexa sent warriors to kill teenagers because they were a potential threat. Bellamy helped killed the grounder army because they were a potential threat.  If people can understand what Clarke and Lexa did for their people and move on, why can’t they get over what Bellamy did as well? Why do other characters get to be redeemed within a few episodes, or get no redemption arc whatsoever and their actions are simply justified or glossed over, but Bellamy has to spend entire seasons trying to earn his redemption? The truth is that Bellamy will NEVER meet the fandom’s standards. He has to be absolutely perfect or everyone will call for his death, and on the moment he messed up, he started being treated as an unredeemable trash bag. Even now that he’s trying to be better, people are mad that he’s being portrayed as a better person than Clarke. No matter what he does, people will find a reason to hate him.

“And to do this, of course, the nature of the other characters is damaged. Take Clarke. Stubborn, confident, ready to challenge anyone. From season 3 on, she switches between being Bellamy’s punching bag, his emotional crutch, or being obscured and worsened to prop up his character. In season 3 he lashes out at her, sneers at her, belittles her. And she doesn’t react at all, but instead stays there to offer her support when he’s done being angry and needs a shoulder to cry on. In season 4 we even have a role-reversal of sorts, wherein Clarke makes a wrong choice (stealing the bunker) and Bellamy is shown to be the moral compass of the situation, and the season 4 finale is all about Bellamy, with Clarke being relegated to plot tool and deprived of any emotional resolution.” I’m also having trouble with this part. I know that I’m starting to sound annoyed, and that’s because so far I’ve been able to mostly at least understand where you’re coming from even though I disagree, but this right here? It’s the same coddling Clarke while shitting on Bellamy bullshit that I see all the time. Honestly, the idea of Clarke being Bellamy’s punching bag is… laughable, because since season 2, there’s clearly been a power imbalance and princess/knight dynamic between them. Literally what the fuck did he do to her? He handcuffed her once and tried to take her to Pike. This was ONE occasion, but the way you say it makes it sound like it’s some sort of constant abuse where he’s repeatedly lashing out at her. In season 4 she kidnapped him and shot at him when he tried to escape, and he LAUGHED IT OFF. Bellamy has a right to be angry at Clarke, but he’s rarely allowed to be. She often treats him and his sister like shit and he always forgives her because the writers see him as the loyal knight to her princess. The only time after season 1 where I can remember him being angry at her was when he called her out for leaving Arkadia and leaving Octavia to die in Tondc. I also find interesting that you have a problem with Bellamy being the moral compass of the situation as opposed to Clarke. Why should she be inherently morally superior? Why didn’t you have a problem when Bellamy was demonized to prop up Clarke, but you have a problem when Bellamy is shown to be a better person? The show has always put Clarke and her feelings first. What’s so bad about Bellamy, the male lead, getting the spotlight every now and then? Why, even when Clarke makes bad choices, you’re still defending her and arguing that she deserved better writing, whereas when Bellamy made bad choices, you promptly decided that you could never like him again? These are genuine questions.

“Octavia is the only one who feels angry at Bellamy, but the show isn’t interested in exploring her feelings. Or to be more precise, the show is interested in her pain and anger because of the effects they have on Bellamy. Just take as an example that horrifying scene that never should have existed of Octavia beating up Bellamy in the cave. The scene (and the script as well) is entirely from his POV. The center of the scene isn’t Octavia’s grief, it’s Bellamy’s pain. His voluntary martyrdom as he gives himself up to his sister’s rage, bleeding in slow motion and not reacting. It’s a nasty, horrible scene that also has the effect of making Octavia invisible, crushing her character under all this violence and horror that we are forced to focus on, much like the other people in the cave. She has lost the man she loved but instead of focusing on her grief, she is shown in this extremely violent light that makes it impossible to sympathize with her in that moment, while instead it makes the audience feel bad for Bellamy. Same thing in 313, when merely days after Lincoln’s death, Bellamy complains because Octavia hasn’t forgiven him yet. She is shown cold and harsh, while the suffering that is shown and explored is Bellamy’s." I think it says a lot that in a scene where Bellamy is being beaten up by his sister, you’re more worried about Octavia’s grief than his pain. Octavia’s history of abuse didn’t start in that cave. It started in season 2 when she hit Lincoln and tried to teach him about his own culture. She has had this issue for a long time. Octavia’s feelings don’t mean anything to me and she DOESN’T deserve sympathy. That scene was completely disgusting and unnecessary, and definitely not because of Octavia. I’ll put it more clearly: in a scene of gratuitous violence against a man of color at his white sister’s hands, your priority should be to be concerned about the racism shown, not worrying that this made her unsympathetic or him sympathetic. That being said, according to you this scene made it impossible to sympathize with Octavia, yet I remember distinctly a post with SEVEN THOUSAND notes from Clexa shippers who couldn’t WAIT until Octavia beat up her brother. I remember people celebrating it and laughing about it. I’m also annoyed about people making Lincoln’s death about Octavia. He was more than being Octavia’s boyfriend. Losing him doesn’t excuse her violence. Bellamy didn’t kill Lincoln. Octavia wanted to lash out and targeted her brother, the one person who's been sacrificing everything for her since the second she was born. He shouldn’t be seeking her forgiveness. SHE should be the one desperate to be forgiven by him.

“Season 4 is even worse when it comes to this, with the writing caging Octavia in this nonsensical storyline centered on her downward spiral supposedly started with her killing Pike. We’re supposed to question the morality of that choice and it’s even used as one of the pieces of evidence of Octavia’s growing darkness by Kane, the same person who told Bellamy to forget his past actions.”

“Nothing about all this is realistic or narratively coherent, these are choices made to heighten the scope of Bellamy’s redemption because now Bellamy not only is subjected to her anger but is also worried about her soul. And eventually, of course, their relationship is restored. With the exception of maybe one scene in 311, we can’t really talk about any actual confrontation between these two when it comes to Bellamy’s redemption storyline, between Bellamy and any character really.”

Bellamy’s bad actions came from a place of wanting to protect his people. Octavia became a killer because she was sad and angry at the world. Of course Kane is able to forgive Bellamy, because he can relate to him, but Octavia’s actions are purely selfish. The relationship between the Blake siblings shouldn’t have been restored, because, again, she was abusive towards him. But, as always, Bellamy is the punching bag of the white girls on this show and HE has to earn THEIR redemption despite them being horrible to him.

“The point of Bellamy’s storyline is that he learns to forgive himself.”

“And when the core of the redemption of a character like Bellamy is based on him letting go of guilt to go party and get drunk, I really struggle with calling it “redemption.”” It’s almost like you want everyone to hate him and constantly remind him of everything he did like this is gonna solve anything. He did bad things. The others did, too. Everyone is dealing with their own issues and berating Bellamy, and Bellamy only, for the things he did, would be hypocritical. I don’t see the fandom demanding the same treatment for Clarke, Octavia, Kane, Abby, etc. Kane did the culling in season 1, and he was redeemed on the same season. As I said before, the narrative won’t even acknowledge that Clarke has been doing some fucked up stuff to her “friends” and grounders. Bellamy’s arc with Pike started and ended in season 3, and in season 4 he tried his hardest to be a better person and make up for his mistakes, but it’s STILL not enough. Him regretting what he did isn’t a bad thing. It shows his humanity. This is exactly what I meant by “holding Bellamy up to higher standards”. Bellamy can’t win. If he makes mistakes, he’s a monster. If he regrets his actions and tries to be a better person, it’s “unearned”. Is the real issue here that Bellamy’s redemption was badly written, or that you see Bellamy as the only character who needs redemption?

I will say this: People’s hatred of Bellamy is directly connected to Clarke. Bellamy calls Clarke out on her shit and handcuffs her, and they lose their minds. Bellamy is shown as a better person than Clarke, and they can’t fathom it. They tolerate Bellamy when he’s a good soldier doing everything for his princess. When he has his own priorities that don’t involve her, though? Then he’s the devil. People hate Bellamy because he dares not to lick the ground Clarke walks on. People are allowed to dislike Bellamy. He doesn’t have to be everyone’s favorite character. But be aware of racist writing, double standards, and how those affect your perceptions of certain characters.

[brian-lozano91]

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi review

The Last Jedi is the ninth film in the Star Wars series and the sequel to The Force Awakens and is Directed by Rian Johnson (Looper, Brick) it stars Daisy Ridley, Mark Hamill, John Boyega, Adam Driver, Carrie Fisher, Oscar Isaac, Andy Serkis, Domhnall Gleeson, Gwendoline Christie. The story is Luke Skywalker's peaceful and solitary existence gets upended when he encounters Rey, a young woman who shows strong signs of the Force. Her desire to learn the ways of the Jedi forces Luke to make a decision that changes their lives forever. Meanwhile, Kylo Ren and General Hux lead the First Order in an all-out assault against Leia and the Resistance for supremacy of the galaxy.

This film is getting a lot of controversy, in one in hand fans are loving this and others are hating this. Reading and watching a lot of those reviews I can understand why.I want to talk about the best part of the film. The best parts of the film has to do with everything with Rey, Kylo and Luke. That entire storyline which is the main focus is absolutely fantastic, the reason is the character of Luke is great because it’s different from what you think the character was going to be. Everyone thought he was going to be another Obi-Wan, Yoda or the way he was in the Expanded Universe. However making Luke a grumpy man who doesn’t want anything to do with Rey, the force or the jedi. The fact that he has lost his way and belief because of what happen with Kylo is great storytelling. Also the way they shot the flashbacks with Luke and Ben in the hut and the way they showed what happen and the different perspectives on the people telling it, which makes Rey and the audience think what was happening and who’s telling the truth and felt reminiscent of Akira Kurosawa's film Rashomon. Which has different perspectives on what happen in the story and makes the audience think about who is telling the truth and who’s lying.

I loved that, it was something new and different from what Star Wars usually does and I do like Rey and Luke’s dynamic with each other. Rey’s reaction to the way Luke is the way the audience feels about Luke. She wants Luke to come back and help them. Also Rey trying to find some kind of closure to who her parents are and where she belongs in the force and wants Luke to be her mentor. Everything here is on point and I feel this is where the screenplay shines. But not only the screenplay but the acting is fantastic here. Mark Hamill as Luke a character he hasn’t played since Jedi is really good here. I Love the fact that Luke was really grumpy and didn’t care, then we find out why in flashbacks and the way Mark Hamill acts in those scenes are so powerful. He is really good and I’m glad he came back. Then when we get to the end, I know a lot of people were kinda disappointed when he came back. But I feel it did show Luke’s full power and finish his character arc in this movie and finishes his storyline completely, giving a nice finale to his story.

Daisy Ridley is really good in this and is proving she is an actress to lookout for, she is not as charismatic as she was in the first one but her role in this movie doesn’t call for that. She is more serious and dramatic. I liked her is this film, she unsure of herself and where she belongs in the universe. She looking for a parent figure someone to show her the way and the fact that Luke isn’t willing to help her and when she starts talking to Kylo, she starts to wonder if Luke was telling the truth then trying to get him back into the fight. She is great, I felt for her character, I wanted her to find out about her parents. Then when we find out about her parents is so different and new that I understand why people didn’t like that because it felt like a really big deal in the last one and then when you find out and it’s not, I get it but to me this was so much better. She is not related to anyone important, she’s her own character, unique that what we need for a character.  She doesn’t interact with the rest of the characters until the end of the film so the whole time it’s Luke and Kylo

Then you have the second side plot where we have Poe and Leia trying to survive fighting against the first order. I really like this part of the story because it did something different with the character type of Poe, because Poe in this movie it the typical hero character that does whatever he wants and does reckless things and will always work out in the end. In this movie his actions have consequences, in the beginning Leai slaps him and gets mad at him for not following her orders. From their he keeps making reckless and rash decisions because he doesn’t trust Holdo. He learns a lesson in the movie and it was nice to see that in a big movie. Also Oscar Isaac’s role is  bigger here because in the last movie he really didn’t do anything except in the beginning and the end, here he was the main side plot.

Going into the negatives, I thought that the side plot with Finn and Rose is not that great, it’s not bad but it could’ve been better or actually taken out of the entire film because it doesn’t effect the plot whatsoever and it felt that they were just giving them things to do because we couldn’t come up with anything to do, which is a shame because the actors John Boyega and Kelly Marie Tran are really good and both are charismatic and had chemistry but their side story was so unnecessary. The problem is their story is dealing with saving animals and not that you can’t incorporate them in a movie but it’s just so on the nose and also we don’t need to see this in a Star Wars movie, this idea would work in a Star Trek. At least in the episode films if you need a spinoff and had this story idea then I feel it could work, but the main films need to stay away from the real world problems, then we get some bad dialogue or motivations that don’t make sense at the end. For example, Finn was going to kill himself at the end to save everyone but then Rose saves and pushes him out of the way, the reason for that is because as she says we must learn to save ourselves. Because love is what will win this battle. Why? The scene would’ve been more powerful if Finn had died at that scene, his arch felt like it was finished especially from the last movie and it would’ve given Rey more of a purpose for the next film to stop the first order for Finn and we would’ve been behind him because we like Finn.

Also I noticed this in the film and it took me awhile and listening to a lot of reviewers that this new Star Wars does feel a little to political. Like for example, most of the men in this movie do feel kind of dumb and angry and easy to react. Why do we need this in Star Wars and why now. Previous female and male characters in the old E.U. and even recently in Force Awakens, Clone Wars TV show, Rebels, Rogue One and the new canon books felt well written. Both genders felt the same and none were different then the other. So I don’t know why they did it here it makes men look stupid and kinda sexist, which I don’t think it was their intention I think they just wanted to make strong female characters. But you don’t make them like this and don’t shove a political message down our throat if you wanna do it be subtle. Also the way Disney is treating the old fans is disrespectful telling them they don’t matter and discontinuing the E.U. or now Legends doesn’t make sense. I understand that they want to do a new cannon but why not have both. Also saying that your theories are stupid, come on man just explain why you did the changes and you feel like it was the right one, but don’t bash the fans who don’t like it.

Their is so much controversy with this movie, the fandom is so divided with it. I understand why their our things in this movie that would make people upset, they change things that people didn’t expect and Luke’s character is up for debate, I liked it and made sense to me but I’m not argue with anyone if they didn’t like it and also the political message and the way they depicted the men and women in this movie. I get it and people are allowed not to like this movie and are allowed to be angry because of Disney behind the scenes. They are clearly trying to get rid of the old which I understand but I wish they could do it in a better way. But I still really like this movie. As for a recommendation I still don’t know about that, I say see it just to form your own opinion.

4 out of 5 stars