#I try to interpret characters pretty close to canon unless it’s in a shit post

[dykedvonte]

Thoughts on Benny + The Followers of the Apocalypse?

Idk if you want them separate or together so I’ll give you a little of both.

I personally don’t care for portraying Benny as suicidally arrogant and pathetic. He’s a lot more capable than people in the fandom give him credit for and should def read and take his All Roads characterization into heart as it is canon. I think a lot of it stems from all the other major players and factions being so much more intimidating and equal to the player by the time you reach him and the general goofy aspect of his character like the slang and that god awful suit but he’s truly a force. He cons people, is capable in a fight and is not afraid of getting his hands dirty, he just doesn’t do things that could get him killed if he doesn’t. It’s only when the Courier gets involved that he starts facing repercussions for anything. It’s funny but I wish more peeps focused on his underlying aspects like the fact he is prideful and has a temper but at the same time isn’t belligerent. He goes on benders according to Swank so he really isn’t above all the “missing the tribal days” syndrome all the other Chairmen have. It’s something that always plagues me when I like a popular or well known character in fandom cause they always get dumbed down and it cuts out a lot of the stuff I like to focus on. It doesn’t help that I feel a lot of people treat him like he’s the worst character morally when like random side quest NPCs have definitely done worse than him to you and general on a good day.

For the followers, they are one of my favorite factions despite not being a consequential faction. They had a lot cut from them such as a quest line that had you expose Caesar by revealing all his ancient Roman shit was a farce as he learned it from his time in the Followers and not from Mars (a big reason Caesar has a kill on sight order for followers members or people who reveal they are educated) and just more agency. I think it’s funny they are so close to Vegas while standing against all it represents but I understand why they wouldn’t like it as so many people struggle with addiction and abuse in the Mojave due to how much it sucks to be there. I feel like if you had the option to incorporate them into an independent Vegas or NCR option in a major way they’d do wonders for the future of the Mojave since they universally just want to make living easier and healthier. They are a bunch of pills but they don’t let that get in the way of their goals. I also enjoy how they make anyone who is helpful or just lost a follower (a cut quest lets Rotface join if you encourage him to be better and he’s actually happier for it!!!). I wish we got more random follower NPCs and encampments but New Vegas barely can function with all it has already so I get why their stuff was cut but man does it suck. I think I’d be a follower if I was in the Mojave.

As for Benny AND the Followers? I think Benny appreciates them as a former Boot Rider and tribal. They help those in need and I feel like there’s unspoken solidarity between raiders/tribals and the followers as they likely got healed a lot. If Benny had the power I feel like he’d make them a part of Vegas as like a thank you because y’know, the honor and loyalty is a big part of Chairmen culture past and present. After Emily ehh…. as long as she doesn’t bring it up. They probably wouldn’t accept due to it being Vegas but Benny is just like an annoying old friend to the followers. He’s probably stopped by on his many escapades trying to overthrow House and they tolerate him as a useful in/tie to Vegas power dynamics. He’d make a shitty doctor and most Followers have shit poker faces.

[nightwingmyboi]

Dick Grayson and Temper

For whatever reason, Dick’s temper has become one of the main traits that people focus on when looking at Dick’s character. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, since he does have quite the temper, but since it has become one of those essential aspects of his personality for a lot of people, I just wanted to clarify a few things I think get misconstrued? 

Certain people take Dick having a temper and equate it with him having anger issues or thin skin. It’s bled into art, text posts, fics...where Dick is described/shown essentially as a petty asshole, someone who has a tendency to overreact and lash out at family and friends, someone who is whiny and always complaining (@bigskydreaming​ goes a little more into this perception here). I don’t think this is a fair interpretation of Dick’s character at all. There are two main things I feel like people need to keep in mind when thinking about Dick’s temper. 

1.) Dick’s infamous temper is, 9 times out of 10, directed at criminals. 

Nightwing (1996) #65

When Dick mentions struggling with his temper, he is almost always talking about the anger he feels towards criminals, not loved ones. When he sees people hurt or in danger, especially those closest to him, he gets pissed and can go too far. He often gets angry in defense of his family and those he protects. 

Titans Vol. 2 #29

Batman and Robin #12

In fact, one of the biggest examples of his temper is him beating the Joker to death, as a result of the Joker killing Jason and Tim. Like many heroes, Dick struggles with not crossing the line when faced with crime; this doesn’t mean that he is the same way with those he loves. 

2.) In most circumstances, Dick has demonstrated excellent control of his anger. So, Dick may have a bad temper...but it usually doesn’t make an appearance unless he is under an immense amount of pressure (and sometimes not even then). 

Injustice Gods Among Us #16

Dick’s not a doormat and he can be confrontational if that’s what is needed to get the job done, but he is also known for keeping a cool head under immense pressure and stress. He’s known in the superhero community for resolving conflict and has often been called “the glue” that keeps various teams together. That wouldn’t mesh with the idea that he is constantly losing his temper. In fact, his middle name might as well be de-escalation, because that’s pretty consistently what he does. Look at how he acts in various arguments: 

Example #1: While Nightwing is off-world with the Titans, Jason dies. Likely struggling with grief, Bruce doesn’t attempt to contact Dick while he is off world or when he returns. Dick is left to find out through a teammate, Danny Chase. Despite being left in the dark, Dick still goes to the cave to try to support Bruce. He puts his feelings to the side, and doesn’t even bring up the fact that he was hurt by Bruce’s exclusion. Unfortunately, the conversation derails regardless, and Bruce ends up hitting Dick and telling him that it was a mistake to invite Dick into his life. 

The New Teen Titans #55

Look at how Dick reacts. Even when Batman hits him and yells extremely harsh things at him, he doesn’t lash out in turn or yell back. He keeps calm and continues to talk to Batman; he likely understands that this is a product of Bruce’s grief and as a result allows his feelings/hurts to go unaddressed. 

Example #2 (inspired by @hood-ex​ post here): Garth loses his temper when he learns that the Titans won’t help him with a problem he’s having. When Robin tries to stop the fight, Garth punches him. 

Teen Titans (1966) #28

After he takes the hit, Dick continues to try to keep people from fighting, and in the end, Dick once again puts his bruised feelings to the side and doesn’t say a word of complaint to keep team unity. He still goes and helps Garth with his problem. 

Example #3: After Donna’s death, Dick was devastated. He spiraled into depression. In the aftermath, he was stricter and quicker to anger than he would normally be. Even his leadership of the Outsiders was effected, and as a result, Anissa, Black Lightning’s daughter, was seriously hurt. Black Lightning is not pleased; he slams Nightwing against a wall and yells at him. 

Outsiders (2003) #16

Even when Dick is emotionally compromised and short tempered, he still isn’t looking for a fight. He doesn’t retaliate when Black Lightning slams him against the wall, and he doesn’t interrupt when Pierce tears into him (for a whole page of the comic). It’s not like Pierce goes easy with his criticism; yet, Dick remains stoic and takes it. He doesn’t say a word of complaint or defense, and he doesn’t lash out. He keeps his temper under control. (Just an fyi for those wondering, but this is definitely one of those times Dick deserved a harsh talking to, lmao, support you Black Lightning!!)

Example #4: The Batfam is fighting a villain known as Mother, who is known for brainwashing people. Anyone could be in her control, so when Tim is acting suspiciously, Dick decides to investigate to ensure that Tim is not a double agent. Dick finds out that Tim secretly kept his family in a hidden location to protect them, and unintentionally brings trouble to their door. On the flip side, Tim gets angry at Dick for sneaking around behind his back and putting his family in danger. Though Dick tries to explain his actions, Tim won’t hear it and instead throws a punch. 

Batman and Robin Eternal #5

Even when Tim punches him out of the blue, ironically because he can’t control his temper, Dick just takes the hit and lets him walk away. He doesn’t ever push Tim for an apology, and Tim never gives one. The rest of the series, people give Dick crap for betraying Tim’s trust, and despite Dick’s reasonable concerns being the impetus for his actions, Dick accepts the other’s criticism without complaint. 

Examples #5-57: Just think of all the times that Damian insulted Dick and told him he couldn’t cut it and generally was acting like a little shit, when Dick was struggling with Batman’s death and with taking on the cowl and with running Bruce’s life, and Dick still never gave up on Damian and gave him Robin. Very patient, very thick skin. 

And I could add even more moments! I don’t mean to go overboard, but the idea is that, over pretty much his entire history, from Robin to Nightwing to Batman and back, there are more times that Dick puts his feelings to the side and lets people yell at him (and basically physically assault him RIP) for the greater good, then times he flies off the handle and loses his temper, especially when compared to other characters in the Batfam. Seeing people say that Dick is secretly an angry asshole when pushed a little or is always blowing things out of proportion and being whiny is just annoying, especially when Dick canonically has worked very hard to keep his cool and mediate in various tense situations, even when he has reason to get offended and retaliate. 

And this isn’t me saying that Dick can’t lash out, cause duh he’s a human being and he’s not perfect. He does have a temper and sometimes can say harsh things to those he loves. But, he doesn’t usually lose his cool, and when he does it is usually a surprise. The rarity of Nightwing giving into his temper is part of the reason it is so impactful when he does fly off the handle. 

A lot of the panels you see floating around about Dick’s temper are 1) from times he was brainwashed or mentally influenced (Dick yelling at Donna, Alfred, and Joey are all from a single time when he was brainwashed by Brotherblood for example), 2) from times he was in great emotional/mental distress from the deaths of those close to him, or 3) examples of times that Dick is standing up for himself, that I don’t really see as him having a temper? And a lot of those fights/arguments that are shown are not as one sided as tumblr makes them seem, lmao. Either way, most of these times aren’t really representative of his normal behavior or attitude.

In conclusion, Dick isn’t some petty jerk with anger management issues; he’s a human being, who sometimes gets angry and upset like every other human being in the world. He has a temper, but I don’t feel like it should define him in the way and to the extent that it currently does. 

P.S. This isn’t me trying to excuse the times that Dick has been nasty and let his temper run away from him, obviously. Like I said, he’s human and he’s made mistakes. But he doesn’t lash out normally or often. I’m just trying to put things in perspective. 

[maggot-monger]

some musings on shipping culture

just to get this out of the way: this post is prompted by things i have seen people say and reblog recently about a variety of ships and fandoms, some of which i have been in, some of which i have not. it is not directed at any individual in particular. 

i am also not upset. how other people like to enjoy fandom is interesting to me but ultimately it’s totally irrelevant to how i like to enjoy fandom. in fact, my apathy about other people’s favorite ships is a major reason i am curious about how some people respond to each other/canon/whatever.

the main question is: why do people care what other people ship and why they ship it?

here’s what i got. this list is not ordered by importance.

1) purity culture 

tbh i am kind of burnt out with thinking about purity culture. probably a lot of reasons are somewhat related to purity culture, but i don’t want to get into whether or not it’s ok for people to ship stuff they wouldn’t condone in reality (although for the record, if you couldn’t tell, my opinion is: ship literally whatever you want). so, moving on.

2) whether or not ships are likely to become canon

a lot of the time, this debate gets avoided either because none of the ships being argued over are likely ever to become canon, or because one of them is almost definitely going to become canon. sometimes it’s an argument about which relationship is more important, whether romantic or not (two examples: 1) most wincest shippers understand that sam and dean were never going to kiss on the mouth on tv, but are very invested in the brothers’ relationship being the central relationship in the show regardless. 2) debates over whether elsa in frozen should have a girlfriend or stay single). 

much of the time, people get passionate about ships going canon because of issues of representation. wanting the queer ship; wanting the ship involving at least one character from an underrepresented group; wanting the ship that resonates with some meaningful experience much of the audience can relate to. that’s all cool. i get all of that. i don’t personally have many feelings about ships i like going canon because that’s not really part of the experience for me, but i understand why it’s appealing to others.

i do not, however, understand why some people whose ships might become canon care about telling people whose ships are never going to become canon that their ships are, uh, never going to become canon. like, in my experience, usually people who ship a never-going-to-be-canon ship know that it’s never going to be canon, and while they might be salty about it, they aren’t claiming that their thing is going to be what happens in canon. i get why never-going-to-be-canon shippers might get pissy at might-be-canon shippers because it sucks to “lose,” or because often (not always) might-be-canon ships are very popular comparatively and it can get tiresome to see your fandom dominated by something you don’t like/care about. but why do fans of popular (might-be-)canon ships get pissy about fans of never-gonna-be-canon ships, within fandom spaces?

a lot of this tension might be because of fandom dominance wars, rather than canon dominance wars. the never-gonna-be-canon shippers might feel that the might-be-canon shippers are dominating fandom spaces, but the might-be-canon shippers might feel that the never-gonna-be-canon shippers are dominating canon spaces. often when this happens both ships take up a lot of fandom space regardless of which takes up more, and might in fact be equally popular. so this might be just misperceptions about relative popularity, and feeling like your ship is being attacked/ignored disproportionately in the fandom when in reality it isn’t. i have definitely seen this sort of attitude from warring flagship supporters many a time.

but ok, to come back to why might-be-canon shippers make arguments against never-gonna-be-canon shippers based on likelihood of canonization: why? i don’t get it. i’ve seen this happen even with people who ship fully realized canon relationships arguing against people who ship fully non-canon relationships. why? 

my instinct is to think that last one is a sore winner thing. like, you won dude. good for you. take your winnings and let everybody else lick their wounds/carry on with their own preferences in peace. i’m even inclined to think that canon shippers as a rule should ignore most baiting by non-canon shippers because losers should be allowed to be little a bitter, as a treat. but at this point, i realize that i have just made a claim about how people should act in fandom, and who am i to say that? no one. so: never mind. and it might not be a gloating thing anyway.

another piece of evidence i see people bring up in these arguments is about basis in canon, rather than likelihood of canonization. that seems like another major point, so let’s move on to that. 

3) basis in canon

whether or not a ship is likely to become canon, there are lots of conversations about which ships make the most sense given evidence from the canon. 

i, being a massive slut for characterization, get this sort of. usually even when i enjoy crack ships i want to make them work with textual evidence somehow. i personally just think it’s more satisfying to figure out how two characters might have met and what would have appealed to them about each other to lead them to connect/date/bang/whatever, even if it never happened and never will happen and nobody would even think about the pairing unless either they were trying to be funny or they were really far down a rabbit hole. that’s my own geeky cross to bear.

i don’t get why “basis in canon” makes any ship better than any other ship though. sometimes a ship is within reach of canon characterization/story, and the work to go from non-canon to canon is suuuper minimal. these ships make sense pretty much as they are. that’s cool! such ships are usually popular for a reason: they appeal to a lot of fans of the canon because not a lot has to be done to the source material to make it work. often, the more you have to modify/do interpretation footwork, the more people’s interesting is going to drop off because you’re getting further from the source, and the source is why everyone is here in the first place. (some fandoms are of course exceptions to this.)

but why is closer-to-canon better? sometimes the work to get from canon to a far-from-canon ship is really clever, and does actually make a lot of sense if you follow the reasoning. sometimes far-from-canon ships are satisfying in a way other closer-to-canon ships aren’t (at least to some people). sometimes far-from-canon ships allow for creativity that closer-to-canon ships don’t. sometimes the appeal of far-from-canon ships is none of that, and it’s purely because the ship is sexy, or it’s controversial, or it’s weird, or people have gotten tired of the fandom flagships and they’re looking for something new. 

i don’t understand why any of that is worse than the reasons for shipping something with “more basis in canon.”

personally, i get tired of fandom flagships in most of the fandoms i’ve been in very quickly. furthermore, i lose interest in ships almost immediately if/when they become canon. that’s not a value judgment; it’s just a pattern in my own preferences that i’ve observed from 15+ years of fandom involvement. i enjoy having to work in the murky waters farther from canon to justify my weird little ships. i find the moment of canonization exciting and satisfying (and sometimes emotional and vindicating), but i do not enjoy watching people actually being in romantic relationships very much (part of this is probably due to the fact that i personally do not enjoy being in romantic relationships very much). i also just tend to enjoy elements of ships that a lot of people find off-putting, but this is going back to purity culture and, again, i don’t want to get into that. these preferences reliably lead me away from close-to-canon ships and fandom flagships. 

(just to be clear: i’m not being attacked. i do not feel attacked. i'm just using myself as a rhetorical example here.)

does this make my taste in ships bad? i don’t know what "bad taste in ships” means, but if you’re going to say that my taste is bad, i’m going to want you to justify it. 

does it make my taste in ships stupid? well, sure, i do like stupid shit sometimes. but i also feel that it would be strange, if not flat-out incorrect, to claim that my taste in off-norm ships is not thoughtful. i think about many of my far-from-canon ships a lot — often, i think about them a lot before i start shipping them/see anyone else ship them, and i decide i like the characters together because i’ve come at it from a character analysis perspective. i have liked ships for some extremely nerdy reasons. a lot of people who like far-from-canon ships get there because they like thinking about characterization and plot and symbolism. to be completely honest, i often end up liking rarepairs in part because the people who end up liking rarepairs often have higher overall intellectual skill and desire to think about things extensively on average than fans of fandom flagships do on average. so, is liking far-from-canon ships stupid? that’s subjective. is it unintelligent? probably not.

is enjoyment of these ships dumber when people don’t get there through a lot of analysis, or when they don’t try to justify their enjoyment once they’ve decided they like a ship? i have seen extremely well-written, clever, extensively researched fic about pairings the author had no interest in justifying, and imo that’s just as intellectually motivated as analysis about why the ship makes sense. so, i would say, no.

is it bad to ship stuff and have no intellectual interest in it all? i mean, everyone can have whatever opinion about this, but in my opinion, no. this is fandom. this is for fun-having. i’m a nerd, but not everybody has to be a nerd. sometimes i like to read stuff that is not nerdy, that just shows me something comforting or new or evocative and doesn’t ask me to care about how we’ve gotten there. i might care anyway, but that’s on me, and it doesn’t make my enjoyment better than the enjoyment of someone who doesn’t want to overthink it.

finally, even if a ship having no basis in canon does make it worse somehow, who cares? what is the point of arguing over ship quality, of all things? is it just elitism? is it defensiveness against criticism of fan work being inferior to original work? is it a desire for everything to make sense, paired with a belief that people prefer things that make the most sense? if anybody has read this far and has insight into this, please tell me. i see this so often, and it baffles me every time. i don’t really want to agree, but i want to understand.

so, i don’t quite get this one. i get parts of it, but overall, i don’t get it. 

4) i don’t have a number 4. i put a number 4 when i started writing this post but i think i covered what i was going to say here in points 1-3. alternatively i forgot my 4th point in which case RIP.

if you read this far, i apologize for the messy organization. i wrote this primarily to sort out my own thoughts. i’m not sure it helped, but it was something to do for an hour XD

[fatedfuturist]

things about my interpretation of tony stark. updated june 07, 2020.

here’s my exhaustive explanation for how i am not canon-compliant with the events and characterization of the mcu.

the reason for this is… well, there are several reasons, but i don’t want to stir shit up or just, in general, stomp on anyone else’s love for the mcu. and don’t get me wrong— i do love the mcu! but there are parts i’m critical of for personal reason, as we all have opinions on certain things. bc, yeah, you can love something, or someone, and still be logically critical about it or them.

anyway, here’s where my interpretation differs…

as per stated on my rules: i take inspiration for tony from multiple sources, including the mcu, marvel comics, the television show: avengers assemble, and my own personal headcanons. TONY IS ALSO ASIAN (SPECIFICALLY CHINESE) AMERICAN!!

i will admit that saying this isn’t particularly helpful if people don’t know, specifically, where i differ in terms of my interpretation of our dumbass genius. some of this info is scattered about on my blog, but here, it’s all consolidated into one post.

chen kun is my face claim, and i do use stuff from tony’s story from the mcu as a base. however, there are events and moments from the movies, that i selectively ignore due to personal preference; and then i build on top of my foundation with ideas, themes, and/or events from other sources such as the aforementioned sources listed above.

throwing this all under a read more because, like i said: exhaustive list. very. very. very fucking long. i’m serious– read at your own risk.

howard stark was an extremely abusive and absent father for all of tony’s childhood; tony did actively seek attention and approval from howard because he was rather aware of how famous he was and wanted the acceptance and validation from his dad; there wasn’t much shown in the mcu regarding his relationship with his father, but my inspiration for his father-son relationship comes from the comics;

an example of his verbal abuse: “you don’t want to be a sissy, now do you? stark men are made of iron!” (Iron Man, 1968);

an example of early exposure to alcohol: at age five, howard forced a drink into tony’s hand (which he did drink), stating that it would teach him “to be a man,” and that it’d “put hair on your chest” (Iron Man, 1968);

yes, this means that tony ‘forgiving’ howard in endgame is completely chucked out the window;

tony loses his parents the night of december 16, 1996 (not 12/16/1991), at the age of seventeen;

jarvis, the family butler, was more of a father to tony than howard ever was, and yes, this is why he names his first fully-functioning AI system jarvis;

tony was close with his mother, maria; she was his safehouse, and she taught him to be gentle and loving, and she also taught him the piano, which tony still periodically practices during his own time in private. in an avengers assemble episode, there is a piano in the tower that tony protects twice, which i reckon is because it has connections to his past with maria;

tony ain’t an old grandpa. i don’t see him being older than, like, 35–40 in the present time for my writing (chen kun is 44). this comes from comic and avengers assemble inspiration, which has been fairly ambiguous since they never mention his age. for plotting purposes in the mcu though, yes, he can be like 42–52 if needed.

tony is, by default, single unless otherwise stated. the reason for this is simply because i’m not big on tony / pepper in the mcu, and it’s not because i don’t like pepper (i love her as a character as an individual), but i just saw that the way they were written (so, this, yes, blames the mcu writers) was completely trash; they sort of redeemed it in endgame, but... in general, they had a lot of potential but then some writing choices pretty much ruined the ship for me;

this means that morgan does not exist unless otherwise specified and discussed, though i do enjoy the concert of tony being a dad to his own kid and breaking that cycle of howard’s shitty parenting;

i’m going to be as honest and transparent as i can: i do, for certain, love writing stevetony. they’re my primary ship. not simply in mcu dynamics, but from the comics and avengers assemble. however, like some can attest to, i will never force a ship on anyone. if you express no interest in them romantically? that’s fine. we can write them simply as good friends and comrades. i won’t stop writing or plotting with you if you don’t like them in a romantic dynamic. if you do like it that way? cool. i know it might be intimidating to discuss this given i look like complete trash for them, but i never choose who i will/will not write with based on whether we ship or not;

tony, publicly, hints toward being bisexual and biromantic a lot of the time as he’ll practically flirt with anyone at all times, but he never really openly admits it due to his oh-so ancient internalized homophobia (thank you for that one, howard and societal expectations of the time);

justin hammer is a long time rival in the industry, and often meddles with tony and his work all the time. it’s nothing new. the lack of foundation established in IM2 doesn’t provide much insight into their relationship. long story short (taken from avengers assemble): hammer is a punk bitch who’s jealous and tony is tired of him and will gladly beat his ass any day of the week whenever he drives a tank into his front door (which happens more often than not).

tony is fantastic with children. he loves getting to interact with children because he knows how excited they are to see him and/or iron man (seen in both the mcu and in the comics). this type of attention he’s okay about. if he can inspire children to do good things and be good people and be heroes in their own right, then he’s doing his job;

tony fosters the intelligence and dreams of bright individuals all the time by offering scholarships for high school graduates and post-secondary students, and also provides internship opportunities (equal opportunities regardless of race, sex, gender, religion, disability status, age, etc.)

we only see this occur with peter and harley in the mcu, but there are other kids— like riri williams! tony sees these kids for the bright minds that they have and he wants to help them and keep them safe as he knows these are the brains of the future.

let me run over iron man 3. like i said, i ignore some shit from the movies. tony doesn’t initiate the clean slate protocol, he doesn’t throw the arc reactor into the ocean, and he doesn’t remove the arc reactor from his chest. he will get surgery to get the shrapnel removed because if i were the follow the pain that comes with the comics, tony would literally be always on the verge of death at all times, requiring a chest plate to be recharged constantly to make sure the shrapnel doesn’t get closer– see? that’s a lot and i’m... lazy.

the reason for those choices are simple: clean slate protocol undoes his character progression;

the arc reactor is just a part of him as a person, stands as his heart;

avengers movie nights, (video/board) game nights, and training days exist and you will never be able to pry that out of my hands. tony always shows up fashionably late with coffee and pays for when shit gets broken by thor. team building exercises exist plenty within avengers assemble, including the fact that they share chores and decides who gets to do the next load of laundry from whoever chooses the short stick from the bunch.

tony has had anxiety and depression since he was a child. it just didn’t really flare up and get identified as a real, tangible mess of emotions and thoughts until he’d been kidnapped (and nearly died, at that). it got worse when he failed to address it until after IM3. into the present-day, tony deals with anxiety, depression, and PTSD all the time, but has improved (…sort of) when it comes to handling all of it, and certainly has grown to recognize similar symptoms in the people he cares about;

on another hand, tony has displayed symptoms of ADHD, but it’s not officially diagnosed, and some of these symptoms include, but are not limited to: hyperactivity (staying awake for days on end) and hyperfocus (hyper-focus on work), distractible (easily distracted when he’s not focused on something), rambling (talks a lot and often makes rather intuitive connections due to how busy his brain functions), impulsivity and recklessness (self explanatory), constant need to move around and/or do something (in meetings, he will be moving somehow, whether it’s tapping fingers or feet, or shifting around in his seat);

there are days where he feels inferior due to how human he knows he is (in comparison to most of his team), and other days, he feels as though he’s more machine than he is man. these feelings fluctuate depending on how he’s doing with his mental health, and/or if he hears and/or sees anything about him that points toward either idea;

there is always overwhelming guilt for those he can’t keep safe or people that die; tony doesn’t like to kill anybody (unless it’s robots, because… they’re robots, not human lives); though, if pushed far enough with no other choice, he will throw conventional morality out the window for the sake of protecting all that he believes to be for the good of the world;

tony isn’t jacked. he isn’t captain america fit, but he isn’t particularly thin, either. his body is sort of like a runner’s build (for visuals, refer to valerio schiti’s comic art of tony). i interpret tony’s body as a slight bit slimmer. he exercises, and being in the suit also is its own form of exercise. god forbid we discuss his eating habits, though. and–– he also isn’t short short, but he isn’t tall, either. he sits at 5’10”, which might be a little below the average male, but that’s about it.

speaking of eating habits, simply put: tony can’t cook for shit and that’s it. he’ll try to cook for his significant others’ on the occasion, but he can’t be blamed if he burns everything.

tony isn’t ‘woke’ or perfect, as it’s imperative to remember he grew up as rich and with financial and some social class privilege (since he was rich), despite the abuse and harassment he experienced during his youth. it’s taken him time to recognize this, and he realizes it really doesn’t cost anything to be a better person, which is why he tries to be better when it comes to his tone of voice when discussing certain topics he has no authority to be speaking of, and by taking action with simple manual labour when it comes to chores (so he doesn’t hire other people to do shit for him). he also knows he can’t be a man of ‘all bark and no bite’ when it comes to supporting people and causes, hence why he actively advocates for female and youth empowerment through both words and actions.

in regards to ca:cw events, i would prefer to ignore them. for specific-plotting purposes, this can be dropped, but i prefer the events of avengers assemble when it comes to ‘civil war’. it’s actually really simple:

tony was not honest about his intentions with the team regarding a robot that was initially made for him by howard, which ended up with an ultron reboot that nearly risked loads of civilian lives and the team’s lives;

steve confronted tony about it when they returned back to avengers tower. with tony’s insistence that everything was now fine, steve decided to resign due to tony’s dishonesty and lack of trust in the team;

this splits the team in half, where steve takes— well, they decided to leave since they didn't like tony's lack of honesty— natasha, the hulk, and the falcon to work under SHIELD as the ‘secret avengers,’ and tony, clint, and thor remain as leftover avengers (later with the addition of ant-man and temporarily, spider-man, in some missions);

in the end, they all join back together after learning to appreciate their differences and reconciling under the fact that there wouldn’t be any more secrets that could risk the world, and the team’s safety;

if i am to follow the events of the mcu— between ca:cw and infinity war, he develops nanotech for his armour, which is embedded into his very skin to accommodate for nanobots, which interacts via neural transmissions (visuals here);

tony recognizes that he lost his temper and let his emotions get to him in the moment, which fucked up shit that could’ve been talked through and fixed;

tony is an alcoholic. he recognizes that he always will be, though he’s always working toward sobriety. he certainly relapses every so often when things are rough and he feels as if he has no other options, but he’s aware that relapsing is part of the process of recovery. he has attended AA meetings (alcoholics anonymous), and has been AA sponsors for people in the past;

to skim through the events of infinity war and endgame should these be part of the things you’re curious about (this is getting really long and i’m sure you’re tired of reading this—how have you gotten this far?):

after returning from space, tony took a few months (~ five) to recover from those three months of malnutrition, dehydration, and the wound of thanos’ stab. tony sealed the front of his injury, but he sure as hell wasn’t seen dealing with the back end. during this time, he’s able to regain some muscle mass;

he lives on his own, retreating to the cabin to escape from the responsibilities of being a fallen hero who ultimately failed the people he was supposed to protect.

during the five year gap, he keeps in contact with the other avengers, but very rarely. they’re the only ones who know where he lives;

like i said— tony does not say any of that forgiving bullcrap to howard. victims of abuse don’t have to forgive their abuser, parent or not. let’s just imagine the entire interaction didn’t happen at all;

tony doesn’t die;

he used the infinity stones; but, to maintain consistency with what the mcu established w/ thanos: he sustained significant damage to his right arm, up to the shoulder and neck. it’s gravely scarred. the overall function of that arm also diminished greatly. vision out of his right eye is not as sharp as it once was, either;

a year of recovery and physiotherapy later, tony decides to amputate and go for a prosthetic. he works with shuri and wakandan tech to build an arm;

despite the end of the looming, world-ending thread, tony still battles resurfacing trauma. not every day is happy, but he is working toward recovery. there are days he doesn’t remember chunks of what happened due to the power of the infinity stones; sometimes, he doesn’t even want to remember it, anyway;

tony retires. sort of. for the most part. if the world really needs iron man, he’ll be there;

tony may have handed CEO-ship to pepper, but he still handles a lot of work for stark industries, and that’s what he primarily does post-endgame.

the multiverse and realm-traveling happens a-fucking-lot 

[tricksheart]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Meme.

Mun

& Muse

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by:  Stolen from: @niflheimqueen​ tagging:  Everyone else who hasn’t yet! You have been tagged!

MY MUSE IS:   canon / oc / au / slightly canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated. IS YOUR CHARACTER POPULAR IN THE FANDOM?  YES? / NO. IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED HOT™ IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK. ( Have you went through his character tags? Every day I see a post that comments on Akira / Ren / the Persona 5 Protagonist and how good looking he is, with or without his glasses or in his Joker costume. And between the 3 wildcard protags: Minato. Yu, and Akira , everyone mostly agrees that my character is the hottest out of them ). IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED STRONG IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK.  ( He becomes a freaking god / demon lord temporarily, defeats gods 3 times, the greatest control over his own personas and has stronger personas of protagonists from the past aka picaro versions. He’s extremely overpowered and has several METAs in his tags to back that claim up from the fandom’s point of view ). ARE THEY UNDERRATED?   YES / NO / IDK.  ( Actually he’s a little overrated. Probably will be until Persona 6. Mainly because he’s in so many games besides the persona franchise. He’s even in a SAO game for crying out loud and him being a playable character in Super Smash Bros doesn’t help either since a lot of people that can’t play persona get to see and like him ). WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN STORY?   YES / NO WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER?   YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAGONIST ARE THEY WIDELY KNOWN IN THEIR WORLD?   YES / NO / IT’S COMPLICATED. ( He’s mostly known to the world as Joker / leader of the Phantom Thieves and of course the rumors about his reputation around the school as being the troublesome delinquent transfer student. Other than being somewhat infamous, he tends to blend in with his surroundings and doesn’t stick out that much. It’s in fact a ruse but a really good ruse to fool almost anyone. The only one that barely calls him out is Goro Akechi but mostly out of jealousy ) HOW’S THEIR REPUTATION?   GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. ( In most cases, his reputation is quite bad but it’s not really his fault. Getting falsely accused, having it get leaked by a teacher in his new school and having people generally spread rumors that aren’t true about him really hurt his social status. He’s not even allowed in the library in the beginning of the game and several people actually root for him to drop out of school completely. That doesn’t even compare when a few individuals call him actual garbage / trash. And he even can’t join any clubs at school despite wanting to join. He’s the only one of the wildcards that can’t join any after school activities. With his friends and confidants, it’s really quite neutral. Some people adore / rely on him ( ‘Kasumi’ / Sumire, Futaba, Ann, Ryuji, Yusuke, Hifumi, Shiho, Shinya ) and others initially don’t want anything to do with him  ( Sojiro / Iwai / Mishima / Kawakami, Takemi, and yes, even Goro but it’s more hidden away because he is capable of hiding it so easily). He’s had the most bad luck in game between the 3 wildcards. HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?   —  ( I try to stick close to canon as possible but I’ve had Akira even before his game was released so a lot of things are headcanon’d but honestly, Akira is basically a self-insert as there is no set canon. Even his name isn’t permanent ( not counting all the names he has, why atlus why?? ). The great thing about persona protagonists are that you can use just the bare bones of what the game gives you and just run with it because everyone’s interpretation is different / unique.)

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting

in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals. —    ( He’s always fighting for freedom and justice, actually seeks out to destroy the injustice placed on the younger generation or the weak by rotten adults or people that just don’t care that bad shit is happening to others. He’s always looking towards a brighter future and sticks to his own beliefs and never wavers ( unless it’s a bad end AU or just fails to complete a dungeon on time ). He’s willing to rescue / help anyone in need, even if it’s harmful to himself and never sells out his friends, even under pressure. Plus, he’s pretty and has a smirk so devilish charming that you can’t help to notice that he’s a really handsome boy, with or without his glasses. ).

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  ( His anime counterpart is so bland when compared the game and manga series, mainly because it really doesn’t focus on him too much and mostly on the other characters that surround him. He’s also quite rude to some of his confidants and he can take deals that only benefits him ( like with the Demiurge and Maruki’s happy world reality ). He can be a little selfish and moody, cranky even and I don’t think some muses / people would find that appealing). 

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?   —  ( I guess it was how similar I saw myself in him. I actually relate to this protagonist the most. Isolated, away from home with no relatives taking care of him, few to no friends while in a strange place, everyone doesn’t care about his situation and told him to basically be complainant and not to cause trouble. Also what he represents and strives towards. I truly believe he is the best protagonist out there, with Maya Amano from Persona 2 right behind him. He basically inspires others which in return, inspires me to write this character. ).

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?   —  ( I actually have the most fun when writing him and those who interact with me and my character really seem to enjoy him and his characterization. Plus, I spend a lot of time and effort into him that it keeps me motivated ).

Some more personal questions for the mun. Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

DO YOU THINK YOU GIVE YOUR CHARACTER JUSTICE?   YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? DO YOU FREQUENTLY WRITE HEADCANONS?   YES / NO / SORT OF? DO YOU SOMETIMES WRITE DRABBLES?   YES / NO / IT’S COMPLICATED DO YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT YOUR MUSE DURING THE DAY?   YES / NO  ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR PORTRAYAL?   YES / NO / SORT OF? ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR WRITING?   YES / NO / A LITTLE BIT. ARE YOU A SENSITIVE PERSON?   YES / NO. / SORTA DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?   —  ( Yes and no. If it’s legit constructive by all means but if it’s met with ill content, I get defensive. If anyone doesn’t like my version of the protagonist then by all means block me and then go find another one. ) DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU TO EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?   — ( Yes, I do!! I love when people are general curious about my version of Akira, although sometimes I have to think about something a long time before I can answer them ). IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? — ( Sure I’ll listen to their side. It’s great to hear different opinions since everything is up to interpretation. ) IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?  —  (If my portrayal doesn’t fit your idea of Akira / Ren / Persona 5 Protagonist / Joker then perhaps I’m not the Akira / Ren / Persona 5 Protagonist / Joker for you and the block button is always there. No harm done really. ) IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT? — ( My rules state that all hate towards my character will result in a block and I am not afraid to do so if I get any sort of messages or downright horrible comments. Why even follow me if you hate my character, you know? ) ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?   —  ( Sure. Even if English is my first language, I still make mistakes here and there. If I do spell something wrong or the sentence doesn’t make sense, please let me know ) DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN? — ( I like to think so. There’s not a lot that makes me mad or angry. I’m really chill for the most part ).

[tartareus]

RULES

the blog:

here you will find my rules; please make sure you read them. should any doubts arise, don’t hesitate to hmu and ask about them.

I.  this is an independent multifandom multimuse roleplaying blog for various muses from many franchises. as stated pretty much everywhere in this blog, my interpretation of my muses is mine alone; although i try to keep it as close to the canon source material as i possibly can, there will be cases in which i will diverge from it &&  take a whole new turn with the characters, hence why it is mandatory that you read each file.

     I.I.  please, do not reblog my headcanons/solos/metas. as much as i love seeing how people might like them, they are not for public use.      I.II.  i simply love duplicates ! i try to consider them as friends, however i will never push an interaction with someone; that being said, if you are a duplicate of any of my characters, let me know if you are down to interact with my version of the character, the possibilities are endless and i cannot wait to interact with you.

II. the standard roleplaying etiquette applies to this blog — basically? don’t be a jerk. hate, godmodding, forced ships, ooc drama and other shit like that are highly frowned upon here. 

    II.I. i acknowledge that i may write dark/toxic topics every now and then, and i try my best to do so as respectfully as i can. please, if something ( anything ) on my blog triggers you/disgusts you/annoys you/makes you uncomfortable let me know and i will create a special tag so you can easily block it.     II.II. i have received hate for writing fictional things that are deemed as dark and i will not stand for it any longer. i am extremely shy but  i will always  prefer to talk in private rather than vague post about someone, it is only fair i receive the same courtesy.

the mun: 

you can call me nox, short for noxtromun. i used to go by another pen name that i no longer feel it suits me. although i was born ( and usually identify myself as ) female, i prefer they/them pronouns. i have been roleplaying for over 7 years and as of now i am in my early 20s and live on the countryside of brazil. that being said, if you are a fellow brazilian/portuguese speaker and want to write in portuguese with me, hmu --- i will be delighted.

III.  be aware that  usually do not interact too much oocly  — i’m a mun with social anxiety and it’s really hard for me to connect with people, no matter how much i want to, both irl and online. if, for whatever reason you might have, you want to know more about the queer behind this blog, please check my author’s note page.

   III.I. also, for personal reasons that i’d rather not say, certain plots i will only roleplay with close friends of mine; people i trust and that i care for. the point is, all you need to know about me, check the mun page.

IV. i try to tag everything — really. triggering themes WILL be found here and shall be tagges as “ tw; triggering example” and nsfw will be tagged as “ nsfw ” so you can easily blacklist these tags and not see them. if you’d like me to tag smth for you, feel free to approach me via IMs or ASK.

V. unless asked otherwise, all asks will be published. if you’re messaging me for plots, i encourage you to do so via IMs.

shipping && smut: 

as most people here, i too enjoy some shipping and, occasionally, smut. if you are interested in shipping with me please, respect these rules and be honest, contrary to most people i do not mind if someone approaches me for  a ship; just keep in mind some character development will be necessary.

VI.  i am a ship hoarder— HONESTLY ! but that doesn’t mean this blog focuses only on that. chemistry is your best friend.     VI. I. most of my muses are either bi or pan  — ‘boundaries’ of gender are nothing here       VI. I.II.  however, when a charater is listed as gay/lesbian or straight, please respect that. do not push a ship on me.        VI. I.III. although most muses are of age, some are not and therefore shipping will most likely to happen in their older verses — that are in fact my default ones so yeah.   VI. II. if you want to ship our muses, please, don’t hesitate to ask. i probably want too.       VI. II.I.  feel free to send me a shippy meme — even if we haven’t written before. i love memes, do send them. 

VII. if you feel uncomfortable/troubled with fictional  incestuous /  consanguinamory / toxic and/or unhealthy ships then this might not the right blog for you.    VII. I. i acknowledge that by writing such relationships i may trigger some people, so here’s your warning. LET IT BE KNOWN that i, by NO MEANS condone such things irl  — i just am an adult that is very capable of separating fiction from reality.     VII. I.II.  as a general rule of this blog, i encourage you to unfollow/block me if whatever fictional work here offends you; basically, IF YOU DON’T LIKE A CERTAIN CONTENT, DO NOT CONSUME IT. 

VIII. it should go without saying but no, NO SMUT WILL BE ROLEPLAYED WITH MUNS / MUSES THAT ARE UNDERAGE. pls, don’t lie about your age, i’ll be mad af.   VIII. I. no, there are NO exceptions of this rule.

interactions, formatting edits && speed:

as most of you, i have a life outside this hellsite. that being said, do not expect me to be around everyday,all day, 24/7. roleplay is a hobbie, not a job or an obligation, keep this in mind.

IX. i am SUPER friendly — honestly. i’m just too shy. please, don’t ever feel anxious before approaching me ( ic or ooc ) interacting with me is easy ; i’m here to have fuN.   IX. I.  yes, if you’re an oc i’ll rp with you, i love ocs / mumus / female muses. come @ me and lemme love you ; but only if you provide enough information about your muse/s.   IX. II.   i don’t care much about formatting - all i do is lowercase, small font and icons i made - but if you do, fine! as long as i can read it, i’m cool with anything.

X. i am an extremely SLOW REPLIER; i’m sorry, but i promise i’ll be on as much as i can. i’ll never pressure you to reply and expect you to return the favour. if i ever need to drop a thread, i’ll IM you. every now and then, i like to make edits and sometimes i am not in the mood for writing.

extras:

i make my own icons, using the lovely psds of @kingsleigh and border. some of my edits are ok to reblog, others are not, i will always let you know if thats the case.

[gffa]

your posts about the comics just reminded me of something that's been at the back of my head for a while: how do you view anakin's and obi-wan's relationship as padawan and master? i've seen people argue that it holds abusive elements since obi-wan (as an extension of the jedi council) doesn't help anakin with his trauma (or plays a part in fortifying it? possibly by things like making him call him master) and brushes his worries about the nightmares aside in aotc. (1/2)

i’m not really convinced by the latter since the movie doesn’t show any context for it, but i’d like to hear your thoughts about it. i’m really not prone to putting any blame on obi-wan personally or especially but he’s my favourite character and i tend to overlook his flaws :D (2/2)

THIS IS PROBABLY GOING TO BE LONG, sorry not sorry etc.  :D  I’m going to stick to a gen interpretation on them in this post (and, as always, I have no problem with people who are squicked by them as a pairing for whatever reasons!) and, while I haven’t read much at all in this line of commentary (nor do I care to), I have thoughts on the points you mentioned!During Attack of the Clones, our establishing shot of them, the one that tells us who these characters are now and how they relate to each other, ten years down the road from The Phantom Menace, is one of two people teasing each other and making each other laugh.  Obi-Wan sees that Anakin is nervous and so he makes a joke that’s very obviously something he wouldn’t misremember as a way to jolt Anakin out of his spiraling thoughts, he puts the weight of the joke on himself.  When they’re talking with Padme, Anakin is behaving like an absolute brat, he’s overstepping their authority, he’s promising things that aren’t theirs to promise, he’s acting up and actively disrespecting his teacher to impress someone rather than actually thinking things through.  And Obi-Wan doesn’t dress him down, he pretty much just gives him a WE WILL TALK ABOUT THIS IN THE CAR (TM @forcearama) response.We see that Anakin is getting ahead of himself–he says he can sense everything that’s going on in Padme’s bedroom, except he doesn’t.  The assassin centipedes are already crawling around and it’s not until a bit later that Anakin senses them.  The whole point is that Anakin is working himself into a state in an attempt to impress Padme and Obi-Wan is telling him to get ahold of himself–and then, afterwards, leans in and smiles, telling Anakin (who is upset that Padme doesn’t seem to see him in the same way he sees her), “She was pleased to see us.” to cheer Anakin up.We see, during the Obi-Wan & Anakin comic that Anakin is absolutely smitten with Obi-Wan, HE’S THE BEST is literally a thing Anakin says this close to having actual stars in his eyes.  Obi-Wan listens to Anakin, he takes his upcoming decision seriously, makes it clear that he’ll respect Anakin’s choice whichever way, even as he continues to help guide him.  We see that Obi-Wan is dedicated enough to Anakin that he would leave the Jedi Order with Anakin, if that’s what was necessary.  We see even through The Clone Wars that Obi-Wan gives Anakin his space, lets him be as independent as he can, but that Anakin still wants to go running to him, still calls him Master half of the time, showing us just how much Anakin still values that guidance, still values Obi-Wan’s presence in his life.

Back to Attack of the Clones, Anakin tells Obi-Wan NOTHING of his dreams other than that he’s having dreams.  He doesn’t say if they’re bad dreams (if they even were at this point, Anakin doesn’t look panicked, just wistful and like he misses her–the AOTC novelization said they were nightmares, but that was never from George), and Obi-Wan’s tone and face are deeply caring.  If this were any other situation, his advice would be right, especially for someone who is on the cusp of Knighthood, who would have entirely valid reasons to be dreaming things that he has issues with when he’s about to take a bit step forward in his independence.  It would really make sense if Obi-Wan was speaking from a place about his own dreams of Qui-Gon, which did pass in time, as they’re meant to.Further, we don’t have any context for what the Jedi did or didn’t do in regards to Anakin’s trauma.  We don’t even know when they found out about Anakin’s past, because we never see Qui-Gon tell them where Anakin came from (and Obi-Wan wasn’t there and he never mentions it later, despite that it would be a really good thing to bring up for why this is a bad idea of Qui-Gon’s, to try to get Anakin to be a Jedi) and nothing they say says they for sure knew.  And Anakin himself likely wouldn’t speak up about it, fearing that it would damage his chances in the eyes of his new caretakers–whether he’s right or not about that (and that’s a separate discussion, whether Anakin was a good fit for being a Jedi or not, it doesn’t make him bad if he’s not, just that it’s not the right path for him personally).Here’s the thing, though:  We see some pretty clear examples that Anakin refuses help.  Even setting aside the times in Legends where Obi-Wan did try to talk to him about it, we see Padme in Revenge of the Sith say that they should talk to Obi-Wan about this and Anakin shuts it down hard.  We see that he knows he shouldn’t want more, but he does and it’s because he does not want to change his mindset.  Someone who does not want to talk about these things (even with Padme! he doesn’t even seem to want to talk about the future of their baby, he avoids the subject at every turn, either not answering or changing topics, she is the one making plans) and someone who doesn’t think their mindset is wrong is a lot less likely to get help out of therapy (fandom’s often go-to suggestion for What Anakin Skywalker Needed) than someone who wants to change.  And I have tried getting people into therapy who don’t want to be there and it is not some magical fix it.  It only helps if you want it to help.Also as a side-note, nowhere in Immovable Objects of Star Wars History can I find an example of Anakin calling a slave owner “Master”.  That’s come up a few times in Legends (because people just automatically assume all slavery must follow a 1:1 relationship with US history’s chattel slavery) but never in canon itself as far as I’ve seen.  Anakin expresses no distaste at calling someone “Master” as any sort of indication that it has any negative associations. Is it something fans can play with?  Obviously!  And I have issues with the way slavery is presented in TPM, don’t get me wrong.  But “Master” is only ever used in the sense of a person with a highly developed skill/set of skills.  (eta: To clarify, because I worry some people need it, that does not negate that it was traumatic for Anakin or an absolutely horrifying thing, especially for a child!  But it’s still presented/not presented in specific ways.)But I’m getting side-tracked away from Obi-Wan and Anakin’s relationship.  Yes, they have conflict and issues, but both AOTC and ROTS set up their first scenes as ones that show us how much these two like each other, how much they care about each other, how well they work together.  Obi-Wan and Anakin laughing in the elevator, the kind words Obi-Wan has for him.  Obi-Wan and Anakin fighting together above Coruscant, their fighters MOVE IN SYNC with each other, Anakin refuses to leave Obi-Wan twice in the first half hour, Obi-Wan smiles at him, they bicker like old friends, they have their own special hand-signals.  The entire emotional climax is on their fight, which wouldn’t have any meaning if they didn’t love each other.  It wouldn’t mean anything if their relationship was awful and abusive and terrible in the first place.I’m not saying that Obi-Wan and Anakin’s relationship was perfect.  I do think Obi-Wan’s faith and belief in Anakin blinded him to the true depth of the cracks in his foundation–”He will not let me down.  He never has,” Obi-Wan says, absolutely believing this.  He believes in Anakin’s ability to come through, he shows that every time he puts his life in Anakin’s hands, trusts him to be there when Obi-Wan needs him to show up, that Anakin would never turn to the dark side, because he sees such good and brilliance and wonderfulness in Anakin.  He loves Anakin so much that he cannot see the truth about him.Anakin, in turn, cannot trust what Obi-Wan gives him, he cannot accept that Obi-Wan’s care and love for him are true, unless Obi-Wan’s practically shouting it from the rooftops.  Anakin is a bucket with a hole in the bottom, all that love and praise fills him up and then drains out again by the next day, so he needs more.  Even Padme constantly pouring love into him wasn’t enough to keep Anakin from believing that she’d betrayed him and turned on him, nothing was ever going to be enough for Anakin, and the war emotionally ground them all down and was designed to put strain on their relationship (literally on their relationship because Palpatine wanted Anakin’s relationships with both Obi-Wan and Padme brittle, because he had to whittle down those relationships or Anakin would never fall).But the whole reason we’re invested in it is because they loved each other, because they were so good together.  Because no one else could have done as well as Obi-Wan did with Anakin (I WILL FIGHT THE INTERNET ON THIS), Anakin would never have loved anyone as much as he loved Obi-Wan.  And what we do see of them in canon is littered with Obi-Wan thinking of Anakin and doing kind things for him, checking in on him, offering him support, telling Anakin that he’s proud of him, not taking another Padawan because his previous one still needs him.No relationship in Star Wars is perfect, it wouldn’t be an interesting story without conflict!  They make mistakes, they’re human, and often times they’re in a war that leaves them with little emotional reserves or they’re manipulated into positions where they have to make really shit choices.But they were so good together and there’s dozens of little moments to show the genuine care there, how genuinely good they were for each other, how they made each other better.

[haljathefangirlcat]

still thinking about that “we Have To Talk about how quips are ruining fandom by destroying meta and turning all fic into shitposts” post @ms-demeanor wrote a great rebuttal to, and about the other posts she wrote about it and about the You’re Doing Fandom Wrong attitude in it, and about the notes on those posts. not gonna reblog or reply to any of those because my thoughts are admittedly kind of random and jumping from place to place and probably OT to the point of the discussion, but you know. still thinking.

so, uh. not trying to start wank or anything but enjoy the ranting that got way out of hand under the cut.

so, like... that one “we can’t just block everyone who quips and shitposts because some of these people also write actual meta but then they unfortunately go back to Not Engaging With Canon by writing quippy shitpost-y stuff” line, or however it was actually phrased? besides the blatant entitlement with the “you have to fandom ONLY in ways I like, I can’t just engage with the part of the content you create that I’m interested in and scroll past the rest” thing (which kinda reminds me of the whole “you can’t CNTW on some of your fics, I should be able to read ALL of your fics” thing, in a way) and the ”I refuse to curate my fandom experience and I’ll make it some stranger’s problem” thing (which... reminds me of a few other things, but tbf it has probably been around since the very first days of fandom), what if someone doesn’t even see meta and quips/shitposts as fundamentally different and mutually exclusive approaches to fandom? what if they see them as just two ways to be interested in a specific fandom and interact with it, and maybe even closely linked together, so going from one to another is actually very, very easy for them? hell, what if they (gasp!) even mix quips and meta together sometimes?

I have a few posts about what I think Baran bo Odar and Jantje Friese might have been doing with mythological references and themes in Dark, and about what I got from the series finale. some are meme-like, phrased in a joking tone, probably even shitpost-y? another one is literally just a gifset plus me having intense Feels in the tags, and the last one is an edit of the kind I’ve seen people complain about as “those cringey unoriginal tumblr aesthetics that all look the same” in at least a couple of occasions. does that automatically mean I only wanted to “win” at fandom (with my hard-earned prize being... a handful of notes in a fandom that’s not even that big compared to others) and that I haven’t actually spent probably way too much time thinking about the significance of Martha’s Ariadne play as a commentary on character interactions/plot/narrative themes (and honestly still do from time to time), or that I don’t occasionally read the captions under other people’s gifsets and suddenly feel very much enlightened about why the Ariadne play mentions the myth of the Flood of all things? that I didn’t start reading posts and comments and reviews and theories about the series finale as soon as I finished watching it? that, just because I didn’t write 10K+ words of Perfectly Serious Seriousness about all that stuff, I simply refused to Engage With The Text? 

... and if I said that I feel a little irrationally self-conscious at the idea of writing down all of my (often rambling, sometimes jumbled) thoughts about a series that to me actually does feel very deep and complex, so adding memes and humor to that or finding different means to put my ideas out there makes me feel more comfortable expressing myself while also taking off the (admittedly made-up) pressure of having to write a whole coherent essay where I have to find a clear and explicit way to explain where every single thought comes from and how it leads to the next like I’m gonna get graded on it? or that a lot of those thoughts stem from memories of spending five years of high school translating and analysing ancient Greek poetry and reading and watching and discussing every available interpretation and reinterpretation of it from Nietzsche to Vernant to Dürrenmatt to Christa Wolf to Pasolini to a lot of others and from certain things in Dark violently hurtling me back to those times without even asking for permission, so a part of my self-consciousness is actually “I probably don’t actually know/remember enough about this to base a whole in-depth analysis on it even though I do think there’s something there” and another part is “shit I’m too lazy to dig through all of my old textbooks and homework and additional readings to hunt for the thing I feel the desperate need to reference or figure out who might have said it, so no extended explanation here either”? I guess in the end it would all boil down to “there’s an amount of effort and physical and mental energy I’m willing to put into fandom but I also have limits to stop something that makes me feel happy from becoming a chore”, which. considering the whole “you have to put all your resources into constantly pouring out 100% serious meta and nothing else because that’s what I like, no deviations allowed” thing? yeah, I can see saying stuff like that would still make me a blight upon fandom. and/or Not Engaging.

which, I realize, it’s a thing I keep coming back to. but that’s because I really, really, really hate it? seriously, what even counts as Engaging With The Text correctly? not shitposts, and not quips either, apparently. Regardless of the fact that humor and crack have existed in fandom since forever and that it’s actually not uncommon AT ALL for them to be born out of looking at canon from different angles, pointing out whatever the fan in question finds surreal/strange/implausible/convoluted/awkward/just kinda funny about it. 

also, not canon divergence/what if fics motivated not by a desire to “fix” something that made us feel bad when it happened in canon but by a desire to actually fix what we felt was objectively a poor writing choice from the author, because we shouldn’t Engage by analysing the text to criticize it or to think over how and why certain aspects of it don’t work for us or how we think the structure of the text itself could be modified or even improved, we should Engage by... writing meta and/or writing canon-compliant fics with perhaps a little allowance for slightly-to-the-left-of-canon-compliant missing moments fics, I guess? 

from what I’ve gathered from reading other fandom discussion some time ago, AUs are also out, especially Modern/No Powers AUs, because those are always just an excuse to slap your fave’s name on your OC/disguise your original fiction as fanfic to get comments/ignore all that’s interesting about canon to write yet another dumb syrupy high school or coffee shop AU, even if I’m honestly not sure what kind of AUs people are even reading to never get to the “there’s no supernatural threat so let’s focus entirely on the fucked-up family dynamics and blatant mental issues in a world where you can’t just ignore them by marrying off your daughter or sending your son to be someone’s squire” AUs or the “this is pretty much what happens in canon but adding new dimensions and different outlooks on the themes by moving everything to a new context” AUs. seriously, I could rec you a pretty great “this guy would be a horrible father and treat his children horribly in any world, it’s not just the feudal society around him, it’s him as a person” AU and that’s literally just the first thing that came to my mind. but, hey, maybe Engaging is only engaging with the canon plot and setting and nothing else, what do I know.

... fuck, thinking about it, I’m not even sure if by “not shitpost and not quips” I should even mean humor/crack? because it’s not like the OP was clear about it in any way? maybe it’s just all that’s weird and tropey and not-canon-compliant? I can see the “everybody gathers in the main character’s stuff to smoke weed and weird shit happens” fic I got a chuckle out of some time ago being one of the dreaded tumblr-born shitpost fics that are supposedly ruining fandom by ensuring that fans stop thinking (?), but what about the “everything is the same but this one character is a catboy, not for any particular reason but just because” fic I’m currently following and loving? people have been joking and shitposting about catboys a lot on tumblr lately (I distinctly remember that the last catboy joke to pop up on my dash was the “I’m your catboy gf and I’m stuck in a wall” one...) and finding an always-a-catboy!AU initially got an amused smile out of me, so is the mere premise enough to make the fic just a joke/just taking a trope and running off with it/just part of a shallow trend? even when the author literally goes “oh shit just realized this is all a metaphor for neuodivergence and masking” in the story notes? unless writing a character who’s never explicitly stated to be neurodivergent in canon as a being literally or metaphorically neurodivergent in your fic is always shallow projecting or posturing issuefic... instead of, y’know, looking closely at the text and Engaging with it by interpreting it that way....

I feel all this ranting/venting might end up plunging into Why We Slash discussion territory now, so I better stop here.

anyway, in short, good to know I’ve been in fandom for years yet I’ve always been just a Fake Fan who Can’t Think and is constantly Doing It Wrong (by Not Being Transformative Enough, possibly). gonna do my best to stay exactly like that in the future <3

[siirensung]

Hello :) My name is Dani and first of all let me tell you that I LOVE your writing. I literally sit and read how you interact with others for HOURS and seeing you and a couple of the people you write with gave me the inspiration to create an indie blog for my bb Reyes. That being said, I've never had an indie rp before but I've figured the basics with the rules, verses, etc. Could you please give me some suggestions on how to approach people or get this thing started? I'd thank you forever

asldkfh that’s so sweet of you omg what the fuck

HELL YEAH OKIE DOKIE first thing first: the best way to learn how to indie rp is just to follow a bunch of people and sort of pick and choose the different techniques you like to resemble. that what i did. i came from a long experience of closed group rping with no formatting, and just sort of floated with the indie trends that came and out, and kept the ones i like. i’m gonna tell you how I consider indie rping, which isn’t law or bible or anything, but this is what i look for when i’m looking to follow people!

first, the technical shit

RULES. i’m gonna go over things you say you already know, because there are some. hidden things that people sort of silently expect. in your rules, you must have your name/alias, your pronouns, your age (the terms ‘minor’ or ‘18+’ are sufficient, you don’t need to give your exact age but you NEED to tell people if you’re a minor or not), and your triggers (again, no detail necessary, just tell us what we should tag for you). these are the necessities and the rest is up to you. make your rules clear and concise, and on the short side. it helps to bold important things so people can skim and find them easily. personally, i like seeing people’s shipping policies. bc i’m a shipping slut. are you single ship? multiship? do you prefer not to ship? are you exclusive?

SELECTIVITY. on that note. let people know about your selectivity. do you want to play with anyone who follows you? do you only want to play with mutual followers (people you follow who follow you back)? i, as well as (almost) everyone i follow, are mutuals only. don’t feel guilty if you want to follow this route, and don’t let people talk you into playing with people you don’t want to play with. this blog is yours and your time is yours. spend it how you choose.

EXCLUSIVITY. along the same vein, let people know about your policy on exclusivity – which basically means that there are certain blogs of characters and theirs is the only blog of that character with whom you will play. this is entirely up to you. personally, i don’t do it and i never will. but be sure to let people know if you do! make sure to be honest. make sure you’re comfortable with your rules.

then, the aesthetic shit

REPRESENTATION. the first glance. the first eye contact. generally, this is the mobile preview. have a cool looking mobile banner! it attracts the eye! you don’t need to be a photoshop god for this, either. minimalism is in. a dark screenshot of your character that blends in with the color of your mobile background is hella neat. make sure the color is eye-friendly. black, white, cream, soft tones. if a mobile preview is lime green or shocking blue, i won’t give it a second look. My Eyes, They Bleed. then make sure you have SOMEWHERE on your mobile preview the bare minimum of your blog’s explanation. it doesn’t need to be long. in fact, i tend to like short ones. minimalism, man. for example, mine: ‘multimuse rp blog: dragon age and mass effect canon and ocs’. i’m saying what this blog is: an rp blog. i’m saying what KIND of rp blog: a multimuse. what fandoms i cater to: dragon age and mass effect. what characters you expect to find here: canon and ocs. sometimes people will put their name, too. (also, warn people if you have an autoplay. just write ‘ap’ or ‘autoplay’. people know.)

REPRESENTATION PART 2. piggybacking on all that: promos. gotta have a promo. this is how people find you, and how you can spread the word about your cool new blog. (tag it with the audiences you want to attract. such as: mass effect rp, mass effect roleplay, bioware rp, bioware roleplay, star wars rp, etc etc. the mass effect fandom isn’t all that huge. consider expanding with crossovers to other space fandoms, such as star wars and star trek. we’re buddies.) it can be as simple as the icon promo trend, where you have a horizontal line of icons of your character followed by ‘like/reblog if you’re interested in playing with (character name)! written by (your name).’ it can be that chill. sometimes it can be dramatic. just make sure it’s tasteful. try to avoid gaudy. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS (this is my pet peeve) INCLUDE YOUR CHARACTER’S NAME AND THE FANDOM NAME. i die inside every time i have no idea who this promo is for.

THEME. the second glance. your blog’s handshake. first – and sometimes last – impression. same rules as the preview and the promo, make it tasteful or make it minimalist. make it easy to follow. if you’re not confident in your aesthetic or ps skills, the white blogs with a simple pic of your character in the sidebar is in right now. leave it open to interpretation. theme-hunter is where i get all my themes, for the most part. if you want some cool theme suggestions, let me know! you may end up interested in html through theme aesthetic and wANTING IT TO BE PERFECT. like me. hehe. anywho – you’ll see a lot of Hyper Aesthetic Themes. try not to get worried about them. the most important thing is that your links to your rules, verses, dossier (if you have one), and ask are clear. the writing is easy to read.

also, the replying shit

FORMATTING. okay so formatting is a Minefield right now. personally, i really enjoy formatting! my formatting trick is: twenty spaces before each paragraph to simulate tabs, bolding quotation marks and putting a space between the marks and the dialogue, ( doing this to parentheses and quite frankly using Way too many parentheses ), BOLDING AND CAPSING emotive words or phrases, italicizing things for emphasis, using small font (and sometimes tiny font). but DON’T overdo it. still, the point is legibility. it’s your choice to use formatting at all. i like it a lot, it helps me Feel the writing and reply. it’s also your choice to use small or tiny font, but… i’ma be honest. i really really do prefer when people use small or tiny font. people are pushing back against tiny font bc it can be really hard to read, so i tend to just use small font (unless my partner uses tiny font). to small font (on pc): select all the text, ctrl shift minus sign. to use tiny font: use small font, then ctrl comma. 

ICONNING. again, another minefield. as we speak, rp icons are getting smaller and smaller. my icons at 80x80 with a 2px border, and i often times use a psd. if you get your icons from somewhere, credit that place. i frequently make my own, but not always. as a personal favor, don’t go smaller than 75px… the icons… they’re shrinking…

SPEED. go at your own speed! i cannot stress the importance of this. i’m currently suffering from depression and some Shit, so i may be on the dash a lot, but my reply speed is frequently outstripped by passing snails. don’t write if you’re not feeling it. don’t feel pressured to do it. personally, the majority of the fun of rping is plotting with your partner and obsessing over your character. people love to see people enthusiastic about their kid. that’s why they followed you. bc they love your kid, too. if you have a thread you’re not feeling, be honest! TALK TO YOUR PARTNER.

COMMUNICATION. on that note! get to know your rp partners. love them. cherish them. tell them they’re wonderful. tell them when you’re not feeling a thread. don’t suffer in silence. drop threads. treat yoself. also, follow ALL THE PEOPLE. they may not follow you back. don’t tug at them if they don’t. follow people and make sure you have examples of your writing on your page, even if it’s just a long headcanon or drabble. like a cover letter. 

WRITING. third person. i think i can be pretty confident about this: only third person. i use present tense for the most part, but present or past tense. sometimes there are oneliners (replies that are usually just dialogue, maybe with a lil but of narrative for actions, usually spur of the moment and dropped after the moment is gone). there are short paras (generally 1-3 paragraphs of varying sizes). there are long paras (4-6 paras, usually for plotting). there are Novella (6+ for the Intense Future Tolkiens i can’t do this i’m a dr seuss). 

TAGGING. can be pretty simple. as a multi, i have too many characters to have thorough tagging systems. a lot of people have different tags for like. aesthetic, musing, visage, headcanons, etc. mine is simple. each character has an in character thread tag: * ｡✧ ━ ⦅ character: scott. ⦆. also, a musing tag: * ｡✧ ━ ⦅ musing: scott. ⦆. a headcanon tag: * ｡✧ ━ ⦅ headcanon: scott. ⦆. sometimes a ship tag: * ｡✧ ━ ⦅ scott & liam: just frame the halves and call them brothers. ⦆. and you MUST have an out of character tag, where it’s just you talking, and you must tag every post of just you talking with it: * ｡✧ ━ ⦅ out of character. ⦆. it must be clear. you can make them fancy and pretty like this. i like them. it’s not necessary. also: tag any triggers. important. search your partners’ rules for their triggers. if someone asks you to tag a trigger, do it without a second thought.

lastly, the important shit

HAVE FUN! we’re all here for the same reason. we love mass effect. WE LOVE SPACE. there will always be aggression and elitism and hurt feelings in the indie rp community. always. try not to let it bring you down. play nice. kindergarten rules. enjoy!

let me know if you have more questions/want more detail!

don’t reblog this