#I want her gender but I’m a dumb femme

[dyke-ulaura]

Cordelia is a beer-guzzling backwards hat wearing obnoxious loud dyke.

Fucking look at her

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Lois Einhorn/Ray Finkle

(WARNING! This analysis contains LETHAL LEVELS OF TRANSPHOBIA! Literally what the FUCK!)

I have wanted to review Ace Ventura for a long, long time. I mean, this was part of Jim Carrey’s break into the big time alongside Dumb & Dumber and The Mask, two films I wouldn’t hesitate to call comedy classics. But then there’s Ace Ventura, a film many would say sits alongside those… and to a degree, it does. The titular character may be one of the funniest and most awesome film protagonists ever made, and for the most part it is a genuinely funny comedic mystery.

But then comes the twist.

The villain of the film is revealed to be Lois Einhorn, a cop that Ace had been working with. But that’s not actually the real twist. No, the real twist is that Einhorn is disgraced football player Ray Finkle… and thus, a man. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see the problem here.

Finkle/Einhorn has long been considered one of the most transphobic characters in 90s media, and it is genuinely hard to disagree. But is there anything of value to them? Is this character really as bad as people say? Well, I’m going to tell you how I feel, though two things need to be kept in mind. First, I’m a cis guy. I am going to be upfront and say I agree this character is horribly problematic, but I definitely recommend seeking out what actual trans people have to say about Finkle as well (this video’s a good place to start). Second, I’m going to be using “They/Them” pronouns for Finkle. I’m doing this mainly because the movie is wildly unclear about how they view their own gender identity, and it’s actually unclear if they’re actually trans or just so insane they’ve gone to the biggest extremes to disguise themselves as a woman for their vengeance since, you know, the movie doesn’t particularly care about their gender identity beyond it being a vehicle for mockery.

Now, let’s go ahead and open this big ol’ can of worms...

Motivation/Goals: Finkle’s motivation is where they really shine, because it’s genuinely insane and amazing. They ended up being shunned by society and disgraced after a screw up that cost the Miami Dolphins the Super Bowl, and went completely insane from the derision. This led to them concocting an absurdly complicated plan that involved the kidnapping of the team’s mascot, rising through the ranks of the police department, and assuming the name of a dead hiker, all to kidnap and kill their former teammate Dan Marino for his role in their fumble. It’s so brilliantly batshit!

Oh, and they decide to unndergo a sex change as part of this scheme. It’s done as tastefully as you can imagine a 90s comedy would do.

Performance: Blade Runner’s Sean Young plays Finkle-as-Einhorn (and even portrays Finkle in a photograph back when they were a man). Whatever problems this character has, I don’t think it’s completely fair to blame them on Young; she does a relatively good job playing a comedic femme fatale villain when it comes right down to it. If the writing were better, this could easily be a career highlight for her. Alas, that’s not the world we live in.

Final Fate: They get arrested. I guess it’s better than them getting killed? They were in a room full of cops, it was the early 90s, and they are presenting as a woman while being assigned male at birth. It is genuinely a miracle that the worst thing that happened to them is that they were sexually harassed by Jim Carrey.

Evilness: This is the tricky one. On the one hand, Finkle has quite a list of genuine crimes under their belt: Murder, kidnapping, attempted murder, animal abuse… They might also be responsible for the death of the original Lois Einhorn, but it’s extremely ambiguous and I’m not going to hold it against them. On the other hand, Finkle’s downfall and subsequent shunning by their own hometown to the point their life was destroyed and they were driven insane is so over-the-top in how cruel it is that it’s kind of hard not to feel a little bit of sympathy for them. Like hell, I think I’d go batshit insane too ifI got treated like that for a mistake that was out of my hands! The narrative is trying to say they should score a 4 or even 5, but I think they’re more around a 3, a tragic villain who was driven to madness. It’s certainly a high three because it’s hard to excuse some of their worse actions, but I’m feeling a little more lenient towards them than the movie is.

Worst Scene: The big gender reveal at the end, of course.

Let’s ignore that dolphins have been observed having gay sex before. Let’s also ignore there is a non-zero chance that someone on the police force isn’t totally straight; there was a cop in the Village People for a reason, after all. Setting all that aside, this just isn’t fucking funny. It’s just a tasteless, bottom-of-the-barrel gag cranked up to eleven. I know the 90s weren’t the most enlightened years, but this is still excessive, especially since this is the gag the entire movie’s central mystery builds up to.

Final Thoughts & Score: There is so much to unpack here. Like, unbelievable amounts. This is a villain in a fucking detective comedy film, this really shouldn’t have to be so goddamn hard to talk about!

This character is just so stuffed full of offensive stereotypes that there is genuinely no charitable read for them. Looking at what the film is laying out for you, we have a man who has gone to insane lengths to disguise themselves as a woman for their revenge scheme, the sort of lengths that are usually reserved for people who are actually trans. So this isn’t even straightforward transphobia, it’s invoking the “trap” stereotype. For those of you blessed with ignorance, the “trap” is a nasty stereotype of trans woman that essentially believes they are a man disguised as a woman looking to rape unsuspecting men. It’s a pretty vile term that was and still is pretty popular among the coomer crowd, so yeah, not a good look when your character is what 4channers were calling Bridget Guilty Gear for years.

But hey, maybe the transphobia is just accidental! Even the director has said the intended joke with stuff like Ace barfing after discovering the truth is meant to be a dig at how fragile his masculinity really is if he falls to pieces over something like kissing a man! So instead of transphobia, the joke is… homophobia! Yay? This excuse doesn’t even hold water when the entire police force and the fucking dolphin barf at the big reveal too.

All of this is bad enough, but here’s the kicker: Aside from that massive, glaring flaw, Finkle is actually a genuinely good villain for a story like this. Their plan is insane and convoluted, perfectly fitting into a comedic narrative, but they’re also a genuinely threatening villain when they need to be. But this just makes it all the worse, because they took this good idea, wrapped it up in the sort of shit Joanne Rowling writes for her crappy detective novels, and then made it the punchline the whole movie builds up to.

If it weren’t for the exaggerated 90s bigotry the character is steeped in, I think they’d be a really solid bad guy who would likely deserve a score at least as high as Buffalo Bill got. But the existence of the novel that elaborates on Bill’s whole deal, the (admittedly minor) efforts of the movie to deny Bill is trans and is merely insane and delusional, and the fact he is played entirely seriously and is not the butt of jokes make him far more defensible than Finkle is.

I don’t think there’s ever been a twist villain that so thoroughly decimates the quality of the film they’re in. Bellwether didn’t ruin Zootopia, Hans didn’t ruin Frozen, and Roy Burns didn’t ruin Friday the 13th: A New Beginning. But Finkle? They fucking tank Ace Ventura, and it didn’t have to be this way. There are plenty of ways to have a character pretend to be a woman and have it be tasteful and funny; Bugs Bunny is a queer icon for a reason, and movies like Some Like It Hot and Mrs. Doubtfire, while obviously not perfect, manage to be a lot more tasteful in their jokes. But here, they just aim right for the bottom of the barrel.

With how times have changed, I think it’s genuinely easy to read them as a sympathetic character, provided you can look past the murder and homicidal revenge of course (something easy to do when you remember what caused them to snap). When the movie is doing all it can to demonize and humiliate them for not conforming to gender norms as opposed to ridiculing them for the sheer absurd lengths they’re going to for revenge or the fact they literally fucking killed someone, it’s hard not to take their side. The narrative is already against them for the stupidest reasons, so why dogpile them? You go, girl! You can have a little murder and kidnapping, as a treat.

I’ve gotta give them a 0.5/10. And that .5 is pretty much only because aside from the horrible twist, they’re honestly not a bad villain and there’s actually a lot of great foreshadowing that they’re behind the dolphin kidnapping. It really is just the gender reveal thing that not only completely ruins the character, but torpedoes the movie too. Ace Ventura is probably one of the best characters ever, and one of Carrey’s best performances alongside Truman and Robotnik, but he’s stuck debuting in a film where the big joke is “queers are fucking freaks lmao.” What a sick joke.

[lesbianjackies]

🎉christmas party🎉

sirius black x femme!afab!gn!reader (reader’s roommate is a girl & they wear a dress but no pronouns are used & their gender is never explicitly stated)

elia’s christmas extravaganza

requested by @lhugh

word count: 908

warnings: language, reader’s hair is long enough to be pulled up into an updo, their dress is described as “sexy”, dumb jokes, embarrassment, fluff

summary: sirius’s attempt to ask you out goes horribly wrong.

taglist: @gg-is-a-loser @yesshewrites1 @puppy-coded @starstruckwillows @sw34terw34ther @katsukis1wife @manyfandomsfanvergent @regulusblackswhorecrux @dragon-master-kai

“(y/n)!”

you turned around, mouth opened slightly in surprise. “black?”

the infamous gryffindor stood in front of you, grinning. “that’s my name. i wanted to ask you something.”

you blinked. sirius black wanted to ask you something? sirius black wanted to talk to you? you resisted the urge to pinch yourself. “of course! go ahead.”

“so, i’m having a christmas party in the gryffindor common room friday night, and i was wondering if you’d wanna come?” he looked at you hopefully.

you gasped quietly against your will. he wanted you to come to his party? “i…”

“i mean, you don’t have to, of course; don’t feel at all pressured to say yes if you don’t want to. i was just—“

“no, no, i’d love to,” you interrupted him with a smile. “thanks for inviting me.”

sirius’s expression relaxed, and he smiled back. “of course. i’ll, er, see you then, yeah?”

“yeah.” you turned around, biting your lip and hugging your books to your chest. you couldn’t wait.

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉����

“maria, what should i wear?!” you looked frantically through your wardrobe. “i’ve never been to a party before; i have no idea how you’re supposed to dress for it.”

“relax, relax.” your roommate walked over and put her hands on your shoulders. “wear that green dress—the color fits with the christmas theme and it’s super sexy. i’ll do your hair and your makeup; you’re gonna look amazing, i promise.”

you breathed out. “thanks, mar.” you smiled gratefully at her.

she waved her hand dismissively. “it’s nothing.”

the dress looked stunning on you and it looked even better with the gold jewelry you chose to add and the bold makeup maria gave you. she put your hair in a pretty, intricate updo and by the time you were ready to go you couldn’t stop staring at yourself in the mirror.

“oh my stars, maria, thank you so much,” you breathed, admiring yourself.

“again, it was nothing!” she replied, but she looked quite pleased with herself. “now go out there and have some fun—just not too much fun,” she teased.

you rolled your eyes, but you were smiling as you made your way to the party. anxiety feathered up inside you but it was nothing compared to your excitement for the event. you were going to a party with sirius black.

the gryffindor common room was chaotic as ever when you arrived—students of all houses were laughing and drinking as muggle christmas music blasted from above. someone had enchanted snowflakes to fall from the ceiling and there was mistletoe everywhere—and many of the teens were making good use of it.

overwhelmed, you scanned the room desperately for any sign of the boy who’d invited you—and there you saw him, up on a table, wand in hand.

casting a spell to make his voice louder, he said, “ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming! now, before we continue, i’d like to make a special announcement.” sirius’s eyes found yours in the crowd and your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “(y/n) (y/ln), you are the most beautiful person i’ve ever laid my eyes on.”

everyone turned to look at you and you felt your face heat up in embarrassment. you shook your head frantically, but sirius just winked.

“i’ve had a crush on you since my first year,” he went on, “but until now, i’ve been too shy to say it.”

now people were laughing. merlin, you just wanted to die.

sirius came down from the table and, to your horror, walked right over to you. “(y/n),” he said, “will you make me the happiest man alive and go out with me?”

you let out a sob and ran out of the room. gasps and snickers sounded in your wake. you found a secluded area and wrapped yourself into a corner, crying your eyes out.

“(y/n)?”

fuck. sirius. you looked around—there was nowhere you could go.

“go away, sirius,” you sniffled.

“(y/n).” he ran over to you and knelt down in front of you, looking concerned. “are you okay?”

“no!” you yelled. “you just humiliated me in front of a room full of people! merlin, i knew it was too good to be true when you asked me to this stupid party.”

sirius’s brow furrowed. “what? what do you mean?”

you stared him down. “i’ve liked you for years, sirius. who told you? was it your idea to make fun of me like this or was it somebody else’s?”

“make fun of you?” sirius shook his head. “no, (y/n), i’d never make fun of you. i… i had no idea you even liked me. i just… i guess i thought a grand gesture would be a good thing. i didn’t know it would embarrass you. i’m sorry.”

you blinked. “you were being serious?” you whispered.

“i’m always sirius,” he joked.

you rolled your eyes. “c’mon, mate.”

“sorry, sorry, yes, i was being serious.” you could see the genuineness in his eyes. “i really, really like you.”

you gave him a small smile. “i really like you too.”

a grin broke out on sirius’s face. his eyes flicked up to the ceiling and you looked up to see what he was gazing at. mistletoe. the two of you looked back down and your eyes met.

“shall we?” sirius said.

you didn’t answer, pulling sirius in and kissing him passionately. after a moment you broke apart and pressed your foreheads together.

“i’ll go out with you,” you said, grinning.

[thelesbianpoirot]

Hello, I am not getting any younger and I want to jump back into the bleak lesbian dating world. Should I act like a normie to get a wife? Or should I looksmaxx and stay true to my lesbian separatist beliefs?

On one end I betray myself but on the other I’d have to do an uncomfortable amount of work to become more good looking. I don’t think women will care about my beliefs if I’m jacked.

What do you think?

Babe this is so real, people like to pretend gay women don't care about appearance and that every lesbi woman wants a low effort fat butch, but that is a BIG lie. Even gay women have preferences informed by society, few vary. So looksmaxxing will probably get you more women. I did get more attention my dating app pages when I dressed femme, but I didn't want to do that anymore, so I just get a good haircut, nice looking clothes, put stuff on my face so I don't have awful acne and take pictures in great lighting. If you can do a bit more, like working out, and buying a cool outfit or two, do it, but don't do shit you can't maintain because she'll leave you if you can't keep it up. I met a girl when I was 125 pounds, shaved and with long hair to my ass, and she did not want me when I gained 50 pounds due to health issues and buzz it all off. I have lost some of that weight, but I am definitely not 130 anymore. And I left her because I realized she didn't want me anymore, and I was not staying with someone who didn't want me after I recovered from an eating disorder. But I also don't blame her because you can't force yourself to get turned on by someone you are not. BEING JACKED HELPS A LOT but if you hate exercise, just focus on getting fit, basic walking more, stretching, eating greens, drinking water. But date while you're working on your body, so you know what the dating landscape looks like, so when you post those updated pictures, and the interactions flood in, you aren't too out of your element. SUMMARY: LOOK GOOD IN AN EASILY MAINTAINED WAY - hygienic, well-dressed, good haircut etc. It does help with dating a lot. But being an impossible to maintain transformation will never last and whatever relationship you gained because of your transformation also won't last. I don't start off relationships with strong feminist conversations, I like to slowly introduce my beliefs. You don't want to be preachy and annoying, but don't go too much against your beliefs. You'll hate being stuck with a woman who is your ideological opposite, so if you're looking for more than sex, I'll so be true to yourself, but don't bulldoze her down in conversations if she says something un-feminist, everyone has space to learn. I personally cannot date a someone heavily into trans identity, I have tried that, and I just grew to hate that person, because they would constantly try defend TIMS against any criticism, kept implying I was a trans man, and they just talked about nothing but childish things and gender. It was so cringe, I had to get out of there. Don't do that to yourself. But there is nothing wrong with not bringing up the scum manifesto to your date. Just talking about other things you might have in common before you delve too deep into specifics - books, movies, hobbies, sports. I put feminist in my bio, because I think if that dissuades any woman, she isn't my type at all. I also put "interested in sexual relationships with adult women" for the same reason. But I don't put "radical feminist aligned" because radical feminism has been given such bad press, that despite a woman agreeing with everyone of my beliefs, she might have preconceived notions implanted by anti-feminists and trans activists. Separatism is niche, not well known, so a potential woman might google it, and find some dumb article by an anti-feminist and think you're some weirdo extremist or something. Even if every time I have explained separatism to a woman, she has agreed sounds incredible. Slowly share more and more of yourself with people, don't excitedly dump all at once. It's just rude otherwise. SUMMARY: Don't try to ideologically trample normal women, but don't date your ideological opposite, people are more accepting of your beliefs after they have known you for a while.

[blackwoolncrown]

Introducing: Grey Bimbo, OG Bimbo’s low-energy counterpart

Crafting my new gender aesthetic I call it Grey Bimbo like you’re femme and responsible and openly capable but kind of low key dumb sometimes and openly refuse to Know Stuff about things

Pink Bimbo (classic) loves Barbie + SanX plushies, Hot pink to baby pink, Leopard/cheetah Print and distinct makeup and is positive in an upbeat, sparkly way.

Grey Bimbo loves BJDs + Zoo plushies, Fuchsia to magenta, Grey leopard /zebra print and a glossy, light goth/fairy face look and is easy going in a warm albeit low-energy way.

Grey Bimbo doesn’t have or want the energy to be OG Bimbo but loves her wholeheartedly. Grey Bimbo is what you get when you mix OG Bimbo’s  vibe with Weird Goth Girl externals and High Femme sensibility.

OG Bimbo is, despite how many people incorrectly see this archetype, totally intelligent but is either a) a master at hiding this to take advantage of people or b) great at learning new concepts but bad at retaining them and expressing themselves in a ‘serious’ or socially legitimized way.

Grey Bimbo appears smart but At What Cost. Really doesn’t want to know more than they need at any given time, avoids taking on info if it’s not immediately pertinent, and sees intelligence as a burden.

While OG Bimbo can vacillate between being totally clueless about things but being curious to learn  or seemingly clueless, but totally aware, Grey Bimbo Does Not Want To Know if they don’t already.

“Don’t tell me; I don’t care and I’m having a great time having no thoughts.”

[jellolegos]

Got any korrasami headcannons?

Ok you probably didn’t want or ask for this, but here are my 10 fave headcanons (with illustrations because I usually draw them)

Jello’s Headcanons

1. Small Spoon Korra- Korra likes to be the small spoon, she rarely trusts anyone to keep her safe, but Asami takes the burden off her shoulders a little bit.

2. Korra visits Asami at her workshop: both of them lead busy lives but Korra will make a pitstop when she knows Asami is working late

3. Korra isn’t a morning person, but she’ll get up early to make Asami breakfast: pretty self explanatory, she simps for her gf like the rest of us, and Asami always forgets to eat breakfast

4. Asami wasn’t a dog person, until she met Naga: again, self explanatory, I think she never realised she would like a dog until she met Naga, who she pampers

5. They both have touch as their love language: Korra pretty clearly loves physical touch (whether its the Airkids or any of the other people in her life), Asami is also secretly a touch person, (@xaibaugrove has a great post on this that convinced me)

6. Korra is the “homemaker” of the two: As much as I love Asami I can’t see her being very good at cooking and cleaning (those were never necessary in her life), Korra takes on more of the responsibilities of the household because she knows Asami can be busy and forgetful. Korra is also neater of the two

7. Korra’s a little more feminine and Asami is a little more masculine than some of the fandom makes them out to be: gender/gender expression/gender identity is all weird and dumb to be honest. However, I have seen people in the fandom make Korra out to be super masculine, and Asami to be super femme, which I don’t always agree with. I see them as a product of their environment, Asami having to be the very public daughter of a famous socialite (tending toward the outward gender expression expected of her) and Korra always having to be the strong warrior Avatar, who is practical in her clothing and appearance (typically associated as more masculine). I think there should be a bit more wiggle room for these definitions, Korra might like makeup she’s just never been exposed to it in a white lotus compound where everyone is 20 years older and Asami might love to wear power suits in the boardroom, who knows. This is just my personal headcanon, whatever makes sense to you is what you should follow. This post does a good job summing up my sentiments

8. Asami proposes: she doesn’t want to lose Korra again without showing her how much she loves her

9. They’d have kids: Maybe I’m just gay and soft for wlw families, but I think they would have kids (somehow), at least a few because they would know how lonely it was as single children. Korra could have them, Asami could have them, they could each have one, a spirit could give babies to them, either way I think they’d have kids and make good mums.

10. They’d live long lives: I think they definitely could live long lives, despite all the hardship. 

Thanks for reading and for asking, I’m sorry to clog up anyone’s feed :) I love answering these thank you <3

[gay-otlc]

Straight A Supervillain- 13

Halloween school dance: gay villain edition.

Content warning for a mention of trichotillomania and a touch of dysphoria, but nothing major.

Enjoy!

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Now that eir secret was out there, walking through the halls of Villain High School was slightly less paranoia inducing. Sure, the teachers could find out and expel em. But ey didn’t have to keep it from everyone, all the time, and that made the anxiety buzzing constantly in the background get a whole lot quieter. The whole last week had been spent pull free, and when ey pointed this out to Lani, she hugged em- which definitely did not give Naomi a heart attack, nope, not at all. Ey was a one hundred percent functional sapphic.

That was a lie. Ey was definitely not a functional sapphic, Naomi realized once again, as Lani looked over at em and asked “Hey, would you want to go to the dance together?”

Every word in English vanished from eir mind. So did the snippets of Hebrew and all the Russian classes on Duolingo, leaving em blinking stupidly at Lani, opening and closing and opening and closing eir mouth like a really dumb fish. Finally, ey settled on “Dance?” Hey, Dr. Plague’s morning announcements were boring, and Naomi was always half asleep, and no one else paid attention to those anyway.

Lani pointed at the wall beside them. Naomi glanced over. Sure enough, there was a poster bordered by spiderwebs that read VHS HALLOWEEN DANCE: 10/31 AT 9:00. UNGODLY AMOUNTS OF CANDY WILL BE PROVIDED. COME WITH PARTNER(S) OR BY YOURSELF, VHS WELCOMES ALL RELATIONSHIP TYPES. HAPPY SPOOKY DAY!!!

She twisted her fingers together. “So, any interest in going together, maybe-boyfriend?”

The combination of holy shit right we’re maybe dating and gender euphoria stunned Naomi silent for a good thirty seconds. Ey bounced on eir toes instead, sure eir eyes would be stars if ey was in a cartoon. “Yeah! Yeah, that would be awesome! Great!” Very eloquent, Naomi.

“Great!” 

“I hate to interrupt,” said Cameron, “but you two are gonna be late to class.”

“How can I possibly be expected to concentrate in class when I am bi panicking!?” Naomi half-yelled.

Lani grinned. “You’ll figure something out. Cameron, you planning to come to the dance?”

“Yeah, totally. I’m not gonna go with a date because-” They did jazz hands. “Aro, but I plan to give everyone in this school gender envy. We may need to go shopping this weekend.”

“I would rather die,” Naomi deadpanned.

“What do you have against shopping?”

“It’s always like five hours of my mom wanting me to be femme and me wanting to take a nap,” ey whined.

“Trust me, it won’t be as bad with us.”

“Fine.”

Noel cleared his throat. “We actually need to get to class now.”

“That’s so transphobic,” complained Cameron.

“My condolances.”

Just as Naomi predicted, ey couldn’t concentrate at all with the bi panic. The class ended with a rather embarassing doodle of Lani in the margins of eir notebook that ey would rather not be mentioned by anyone, ever. The other classes blurred by, Naomi learning basically nothing, and finally ey could celebrate eir freedom from the school week with an Arson Gang Friday Movie Night. Noel had to intervene in a popcorn fight before Naomi and Cameron could kill each other; it was unclear how death by popcorn fight would be possible, but if anyone could manage it, it would be them. 

Naomi went to sleep with the prospect of (hopefully not as bad as with Thunderclap) shopping in the morning.

“Naomi! Wake up!” came Cameron’s bright voice, far too chipper for however early it was.

“Fuck off,” Naomi mumbled.

“I love you too. They’re serving bagels at breakfast.”

Damn Naomi and eir crippling weakness for bagels! It convinced em to get out of bed; Cameron knew em well. Once ey got dressed and ate a concerning amount for breakfast, the arson gang was ready to go shopping. Except maybe Naomi. Naomi would never be ready to go shopping.

It was finally starting to get cold out, the wind whipping Naomi’s hair all around eir face as they walked down sidewalks. All the leaves they stepped on came with a satisfying crunch, and Noel snapped photos of the most entertaining Halloween decorations. Maybe this wasn’t so bad, not with these three. 

Their arrival at TJ Max reminded Naomi of why ey didn’t like shopping. “Time to go buy a dress,” ey said, pulling a face.

“Do you want to wear a dress?” Lani asked.

“Not really, no.”

Noel gave em a strange look. “Then don’t.”

“You could buy a suit,” Lani offered. “I think you’d look fantastic in a suit.”

Naomi barely had time to blush before it really hit em that ey could wear a suit, could experiment more and more with gender presentation because ey didn’t have to wear the costume of Blaze and Thunderclap’s perfectly cisgender, perfectly feminine daughter. Ey could be whoever the hell ey wanted. Ey shook some of the excitement from eir hands and said “Fuck yeah! Okay I’m gonna try on a suit and it’s gonna be great!”

With an overdramatic sniff, Cameron said “I’m so proud of our baby gay.”

“I am literally older than you.”

“Irrelevant. Now that you’re no longer terrified of shopping, shall we?”

“We shall.”

As they entered, Noel asked “Where did we get the money for shopping, anyway?”

“I stole it, obviously,” said Cameron. “Had a lot of time to kill while you guys slept in.”

“Being a mad scientist is exhausting, okay?”

“So is being an arsonist!”

“Let’s not declare your arson aspirations in public, Naomi. We have witnesses,” Lani reminded em.

“Damn. You’re right. Oh well, onto the shopping.”

Lani picked out her outfit first; a flowing purple dress with sequins and puffy sleeves. Naomi may or may not have had a heart attack when she came out of the fitting room and modeled it for the rest of the gang. Noel instantly fell in love with a bow tie he found (“It has squids, you guys, look at it!”) and chose a blue button down shirt to go with it.

Cameron’s choice was extremely gender, with a long pink skirt, white button down shirt, blue suit jacket, purple tie, and black shoes to complete the genderfluid flag. 

And then Naomi picked a red suit off the rack and walked into the fitting room, nervous energy bubbling in eir stomach. Ey avoided eir reflection as ey changed, then opened the door with a click to show eir friends.

Lani, the first to speak, simply said “Wow. I… wow.” Naomi blushed.

“You’re giving me gender envy!” said Cameron. 

Noel nodded “That looks really good, Naomi.”

“It does?”

“Um, have you seen yourself?” asked Lani, who apparently gained a bit more eloquence.

“Actually, no.” Naomi spun to look at emself in the mirror and- gasped. True, eir reflection didn’t always bother em, not exactly, but there was never quite a connection between the person in the glass and Naomi. Until now. Now, who ey was and how ey looked seemed to click, maybe for the first time. Eir eyes stung. When ey finally found eir voice, ey whispered “I love it.”

Suddenly grinning, ey turned back to eir friends. “Should I get a necktie?”

Noel stroked his chin. “On the one hand, they’re kind of a dumb concept. On the other hand, gender euphoria. Would you like to try this boring black tie I found before the fantastic squid one?”

“I would, yes.” He handed it to em. “Um. Quick question. How do I tie this?”

“Cameron, give me your tie, I need to demonstrate. You put it around your neck with this end longer, then you loop it around and poke the end through this gap here…” When he finished walking em through it, the tie was clumsily knotted, sure, but it was there around eir neck. And if ey thought the suit gave em euphoria, the tie was on a whole different level. Eir body was actually a home now, for once. 

“Thank you, Noel, I love it so much.”

“Shopping wasn’t so bad, huh?” teased Cameron.

“Fine, you were right.”

“Sorry, what? I didn’t catch that.”

“Too bad, because I will never repeat those words.”

Cameron stuck out his tongue. “Alright, get changed so we can buy these and go to our second stop, the hair salon we passed on our way here! I think I would look great with blue hair.”

“Definitely,” Lani agreed. “I could use a trim, anyway.”

Noel shrugged. “Why not?”

“Okay, so get out of here so I can change!” Even after they left, Naomi stared at eir reflection that actually looked like em for at least a minute before reluctantly going back to the old clothes. After paying with their completely legally obtained money, the arson gang walked back towards VHS. Naomi brushed eir shoulder against Lani’s as they walked, pretneding the action didn’t send eir brain gleefully bouncing around each time. 

“Prepare to have your brains blown out by gender envy,” Cameron said, running a hand through their black-for-now hair and holding it out in front of him.

“That’s quite the mental image,” Noel said. He took a step back. 

Cameron grinned. “I’ll see you guys back at school, then. Unless you want to do something to your hair? Naomi, I think you should get a mohawk. Rainbow mohawk.”

“I disagree,” Lani said slowly.

“I’ll keep it under consideration.” Ey didn’t even want a mohawk that much, it would just be really funny to see eir parents faces. “For now, I’ve got to do some arson homework.”

Noel nodded. “I should do my math homework. Unfortunately. We’ll see you guys later, provided we don’t die from the gender envy.”

“It’s how I would have wanted to go,” Naomi deadpanned. Ey waved as Lani and Cameron walked into the salon. 

Noel walked with em in silence for about a block before abruplty saying “Do you plan on eventually telling your parents you’re a villain?” Ey almost walked into a tree. “Sorry. That was probably a weird question to start a conversation with. I am not good at the talking thing.”

“The talking thing is annoyingly difficult,” Naomi agreed. “It’s okay. Um. I have this super dramatic fantasy of marching up to my parents and standing up for myself, tell the truth, maybe burn down a government building. It’s really cool as a fantasy, but every time I try to think about it as an actual possibility or make a plan, my stomach ties itself into knots. So. I don’t really have a plan?”

“Sounds unwise.”

“It’s definitely unwise. Nothing about this sneak off to become a villain plan has been anything close to wise.”

“But you’re still glad you chose this?”

“Definitely. I wouldn’t change a thing.” Ey paused for a moment, a smile on eir face as ey thought eir friends. “Except maybe I’d make Cameron shorter. Like, who the fuck gave them the right to be that tall!”

Noel nodded. “Completely unfair. He gets to be six feet and I’m stuck at five foot four.”

“They should share some inches with us. Like wealth redistribution, but for height.”

“A completely reasonable demand.”

“Glad we’re in agreement.” Ey bumped eir shoulder against his. As they continued walking to the school, they looked to comment on anything interesting they saw or whatever jumped to mind. By the end, it had come to eir attention that ey did not talk to Noel one on one nearly as much as ey should. While walking up the sidewalk to VHS, Naomi asked “Looking forward to the dance?”

Noel shrugged. “On the one hand, a lot of loud noises, but on the other… it’ll be fun to hang out with you guys, and with Olivia.”

“Ooh, who is this Olivia? Spill the tea.” Ey paused. “If you want to.”

“She’s in my math class and is very pretty and I somehow managed to get her to agree to go to the dance with me.”

“Congratulations!” Naomi was happy for those two nerds. Well, ey didn’t know for sure Olivia was a nerd, but in Noel’s math class? And someone he liked? Definitely a nerd. 

At Noel’s insistence, Naomi actually worked on eir homework, but started another conversation when things got too boring. For all his claims that it was important to focus on math, Noel was happy to abandon it on occasion. They worked for far too long before Lani and Cameron burst through the door, chattering loudly. Naomi turned to look. “Your hair!” ey exclaimed. 

Cameron laughed and ran a hand through his blue hair. “Yeah, I love it.”

“You’re gonna be the most gender person at that dance,” said Noel.

“Naomi might come close in that suit of eirs.”

The pronoun and reminder of the suit brought a wide smile to Naomi’s face. By the time the arson gang got dressed up and ready to go, eir cheeks hurt. If ey thought Lani couldn’t look more beautiful before, ey was deeply wrong, because not only was she wearing that dress to the dance, she wore a flower crown. Violets, for a sapphic bonus. Noel had to help em with eir tie again, but maybe ey would get better with practice. Ey could practice! Ey could wear a tie more often! Cameron looked fabulous, as always, and Noel’s squid bow tie suited him quite well. It was very funny when Olivia complimented it and his head nearly exploded.

Cotten Eyed Joe blasted through the speakers as their group walked into the cafeteria, cleared of its usual tables and adorned with cobwebs and fake blood. At least, Naomi assumed it was fake. You never really knew with VHS. Ey sighed. “Of course they’re playing Cotten Eyed Joe. Of fucking course.”

“It’s a high school dance, what did you expect?” said Noel.

“I thought things would be better at villain school!”

“You cannot escape Cotten Eyed Joe,” said Olivia, waving her hands around spookily.

Naomi laughed and shook eir head. “I guess not. Snacks?”

“Snacks!” Lani agreed, grabbing Naomi’s hand and pulling em towards the table on the side. Ey now felt bad having laughed and Noel for his blushiness, because eir face must have resembled a tomato right then. “Trick or treat,” she said when they approached the table. Dr. Plague, wearing a bubonic plague bird mask, handed them each a packet of skittles.

The world was cruel. Ey sighed as they walked away. “Anyone want mine?”

“What’s wrong with skittles?” Olivia asked.

“Gelatin,” ey explained simply.

“Right.” Noel turned to Olivia, who still looked baffled. “Naomi’s Jewish. Ey keeps kosher.”

Olivia nodded. “Got it. I’ll trade you.” She held out a Snickers bar, and Naomi eagerly grabbed it. “Your pronouns are super cool, by the way.”

Huh. Maybe it wasn’t the end of the world to use neopronouns. Maybe there were people out there who would be cool about it. “Thanks! Cameron introduced me to them.”

She gave finger guns. “I queered eir gender.”

“Care to dance, my eydy?” Lani asked.

Naomi gasped and clapped a hand to eir mouth. “You used a pronoun pun for me!”

“I sure did.”

“But… the Cha Cha Slide? Is that the most romantic dance you can think of?” ey teased. 

“Listen, I don’t know what the hell romance is. I’m quoiromantic, for crying out loud.”

“Point taken. Let’s dance.” And dance they did, through the Cha Cha Slide and Mr. Brightside and Never Gonna Give You Up (Naomi was going to kill whoever requested that), until they were both out of breath and laughing. Cameron was still stuffing his face with candy, and Noel had wandered off with Olivia somewhere, neither one being a fan of all the noise. Ey went around the room, eating snacks and talking to people, something ey almost never did, but tonight it was actually enjoyable. By the time Bohemian Rhaposdy came on and the school was singing so you think you can stone me and spit in my eye, Naomi had decided; Villain High School was, somehow, eir home.

[anachronisticcrab]

This has been on my mind for a while, but I’ve never actually addressed it, so here’s my honest opinion on the ‘feminism’ in PJO/HOO/TOA (I haven’t read Kane Chronicles in years, and I’ve never actually read MCGA, so I’m not addressing either of those)

The Hunters of Artemis

Fucking misandrists. It’s not feminism

Kicking people out for being wlw? Not feminist

Kicking girls out if they enjoy sex, or if they have sexual encounters? Not feminist, that’s slut shaming and it’s not okay

Preying on 8 to 16 year old girls, whose brains have not finished developing? Not fucking feminist

Treating men like they’re the scum of the Earth? Not feminist

I’m not saying that men are great. Personally, I’ve got a long and complicated history with men. But I don’t treat them like I’m better than them because I’m not a man—that’s misandry not gender equality, and not feminism

Lying and tricking young girls into hunting down mythical creatures for their entire lives (during which they will be children forever), without letting them in on the knowledge that they will be in constant danger and will never be able to see their families and friends again? Not feminist

They are the epitome of ‘not like other girl’ feminism, which is a recurring theme in Rick’s books

Plus they’re inherently ableist. The second you become a hunter, all physical imperfections disappear because they ‘make you weaker’? Plus, no way in hell would someone in a wheelchair, or someone with depression, or someone with sensory issues, or someone whose blind or deaf be allowed to join the hunters. It’s not feminist

The fact that I’m willing to bet that femme nonbinary and/or trans women won’t be allowed to join. After all, if wlw are kicked out for being wlw, why the fuck would Artemis let trans women or nonbinary ppl in? That’s not fucking feminist

Also, half the Hunters don’t think that satyrs are real guys cause they’re half goat? Like shut the fuck up, they ID as a man, they’re a man.

Artemis finds underage girls who are unhappy, tells them that they’ll have no responsibility, that they’ll be immortal, and that they’ll have fun all the time... and doesn’t tell them any of the bad parts until after they’ve pledged their eternal allegiance to her and her Hunt

The fact that she stops they’re education?? How is convincing young girls not to educate themselves feminism??

It also annoys the shit out of me that Artemis and her Hunters claim to support women, but send untrained, clueless, unsure girls who have only been a part of the hunt for two days on deadly quests where 2 ppl have been prophecized to die. Wouldn’t you want to send someone with more experience? Wouldn’t you want to actually support each other and send in someone with a higher chance of survival? And YEA, I’m talking about Bianca (not her biggest fan, but it was still fucking shitty)

In short, I freaking hate the Hunters, if you couldn’t tell. They aren’t feminist. They’re TERFs and misandrists. And Artemis is fucking creepy

The Amazon’s

Worse than the Hunters

In this case, I don’t know if they kick out wlw, trans women, or nb ppl (I don’t think so, but I’m not sure on that) so I’m gonna put that to the side for now

What I do know however is that they have actual slaves. Like motherfucking human slaves

They rape men, and force them into slavery. How the fuck is that okay? It’s not fucking feminism!

It’s not feminist to put someone in slavery; it’s fucking inhumane and terrifying! It’s a violation of about a hundred basic human rights!

It’s not fucking feminist to rape guys; it’s inhumane and in violation of basic human rights (again!)

They are not feminist; they’re misandrist slave owners

‘Not Like Other Girls’

Both Annabeth and Piper were portrayed as feminist icons during the series. Right? Right??

Fucking wrong. They both repeatedly put down other girls for exemplifying feminine qualities, basically saying that being feminine is weakness and it’s disgusting

How is that feminism?

Piper constantly shit talks her siblings because they’re super girly (for the most part)

She and Annabeth treat Drew like shit because she’s feminine and she goes after guys (and ok, Drew is a bit of an asshole, but there are better reasons to dislike her than she’s girly and likes guys!)

That’s not okay— feminism is about uplifting women, and supporting one another. Not about slut shaming and denoting ppl for exuding feminine qualities

Femininity does not equate to weakness. femininity does not mean you are less than. femininity does not mean you deserve less respect. femininity is not inferior to masculinity. Femininity does not mean you’re dumb, weak, silent, or cowardly. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You are always worthy of respect (unless you’re a fascist or anything along those lines)

Thalia Grace

She gets her own category cause oh my gods I hate her so much

Not only does she support the Hunters and Artemis, she’s a dedicated defender of it

On top of that, there’s her Death to Barbie pin. What the fuck? Cause Barbie isn’t feminist?

Barbie is a doll that comes in all different shapes, sizes and colours, a doll that has hundreds of different careers, a doll that shows little girls that no matter what they look like, or where they come from, they can do or be anything (I know that it used to only be a skinny white blond girl, and maybe one other white girl, but that’s changed). How is Barbie not fucking feminist?

How is sporting a pin that threatens to destroy a doll that uplifts and promotes self love and positivity to little girls all over the world feminist? How is she feminist? She’s not-like-other-girls

She simultaneously supports an ableist, transphobic, homophobic goddess who preys on young girls, is actively against anything remotely feminine, and claims to be feminist, liberal, and punk, of all things! She’s not fucking feminist, she’s not fucking punk (I’m gonna make a whole other post trashing her, cause oh my fucking God she drives me crazy)

Basically what I’m trying to say in this is that the ‘feminism’ in the Camp Half-Blood Chronicles is fucking disgusting. It’s not feminism

If you don’t agree with any of this, or if you don’t like this, dni.

[alexiraphale]

Since this is an LGBTQ+ safe space, I kinda wanted to ask if it's possible to feel both female and nonbinary at the same time? Would that be considered bigender, demigender, or something else? Sorry if it's a dumb question.

of course! it’s not a dumb question dw :)

it’s completely possible to feel female and nonbinary at the same time. you can use the term “non binary woman” for accuracy :)

again, it can also be bigender or demi gender and since i do not know your personal experiences, you could elaborate it to me so i can help, or i could provide a few resources for you.

bottom line, it is possible to be a femme non binary or a non binary woman. the difference between the two is when you’re femme enby, you identify as only enby but present as femme. i was afar but am enby and androgynous but if you do present most of the time as femme (and like it) you might be femme enby. non binary woman is when you’re comfy with she/her pronouns and present as a female (not to be confined with femme) to the society but STILL are enby.

i’m sorry if this gets too confusing, i’ll add a few more resources here in some time :)

feel free to ask more questions, i’m glad you felt safe. you’re valid and loved, bye!

- alex

[starsbythepocketful12]

headcanons cause i’m in flarrie hours

they are THE couple when it comes to halloween costumes

all their outfits for big events (parties, gigs where dirty candy and/or jatp perform) are coordinated

carrie my femme queen & flynn my nonbinary lesbian darling

go to protests & marches together

flynn lends carrie books by her favorite Black female authors & carrie lends her books by her favorite sapphic poets

they make playlists about each other but the other doesn’t know they do it (julie & kayla are the only ones permitted to know of the existence of these playlists & have been sworn to secrecy, though julie has a strong suspicion carrie also makes playlists about flynn and vice versa)

have a joint pinterest account for their wedding moodboard

carrie adopted a tiger cub and named it flynn for their three month anniversary

they go to the mall together every other weekend and shop, which they both love to do and when they get home they always model the new outfits they bought

flynn squeals every time they see a dog in public and always runs over and asks if they can pet it and carrie always watches her with such a fond look that the owner almost always makes a comment on what a lovely couple they are or asks how long they’ve been together (something that has actually been happening since even before they were dating, and back then you can imagine the flustered ness it caused)

flynn often comes to watch dirty candy rehearsals, cheer them on, make sure they’re staying hydrated/taking snack breaks and that carrie’s not overworking herself

carrie is the first person that flynn tells she wants to DJ professionally and carrie gets her her first gig

eventually flynn gets into producing as well and ends up making a track for carrie, who writes lyrics to it and it becomes dirty candy’s most successful song to date

carrie says i love you first one saturday afternoon while they’re watching a movie on flynn’s computer in her room. flynn laughs at a joke and carrie looks over at her, her beautiful, incredible girlfriend, and simply can’t resist the urge to say it

flynn’s shocked into silence so carrie panics and leaves and doesn’t answer flynn’s messages

that night flynn shows up at the wilson mansion and throws rocks at carrie’s window until she comes out

flynn is upset with carrie for running out and ghosting her and carrie’s trying to defend herself so they argue but then flynn interrupts carrie by kissing her and breathlessly saying, “i love you.” carrie kisses her and not another word on it is said

carrie steals flynn’s hats

they’re not really PDA-y, they just happen to engage in a lot of unconscious, casual affection, like flynn often absentmindedly intertwines their pinkies and carrie doesn’t realize her arm is around flynn’s shoulders until she’s doing it

even after months of dating will still flirt like they’re in their enemies who are secretly very attracted to e/o era

flynn really loves art, particularly murals, so she drags carrie to a lot of gallery openings and museums

at one point when flynn’s going through a hard time carrie enlists all their friends for help making a giant mural full of drawings of things that make her happy

flynn happy cries when she sees it and is pretty much always seen hugging carrie for the rest of that night

only really cuddle when one (or both) of them is sleepy, though flynn does often sit on carrie’s lap

before starting to date, carrie would tease flynn for having stuffed animals during their sleepovers at flynn’s until they started dating and flynn started spending more time at carrie’s and flynn discovers that her girlfriend’s a little hypocrite

flynn has a younger sister and brother (sister is six, brother is four) and they absolutely ADORE carrie and think she’s the coolest and carrie thinks they’re the cutest

flynn’s like no they’re little demons and carrie’s says who says demons can’t be cute? you once called me a demon right, and im cute, aren’t i? and flynn rolls her eyes and fights back a smile

flynn also has a college aged older sister who she looks up to a lot, like that’s her hero and absolute role model, so naturally carrie’s terrified to meet her, and though she tries to appear intimidating at first, she can’t keep up the act for long and starts being friendly with carrie pretty much right away

one day they’re supposed to go on a date but carrie’s sick and forgot to text flynn telling her not to come so flynn shows up at her house but stays anyway to look after her

flynn reads to her and makes her soup

trevor & flynn play video games while carrie naps

flynn makes jewelry in her free time and consults carrie for her thoughts on every piece (in junior year she starts selling them at school & turns out to be quite the entrepreneur)

they have an inside joke about cosmo and wanda

a couple of the dirty candy members sometimes jokingly flirt with flynn and are like “watch out! we’re gonna steal your girl!” and carrie gets possessive and apologizes for it pretty quickly but flynn thinks it’s hot so it works out pretty well

will watch bad rom coms to make fun of straight people and throw popcorn at the screen when they get together

pet/nick names: care, baby, babe, love, (from carrie to flynn who shuts down upon hearing it) honey, (flynn to carrie, who becomes very giddy the first time flynn says it in a text message) sweetheart

if you couldn’t tell before they ofc have an enemies to friends to lovers arc

move in together after graduating, neither planning on going to college (julie goes to berkeley and nick some other place in california where they have lacrosse cause that’s the sport he plays right) and their parents think it’ll be a disaster but it actually goes really well

the first couple of weeks they fight more, all petty arguments mostly out of the stress of moving, but they always talk it out

it doesn’t take long for them to be happy they’re living together and feel really glad they took that step

two years after graduating flynn gives her a promise ring

carrie cries her eyes out and replies “of fucking course, you dumb fuck” when flynn asks if she’ll take it

ten years later carrie’s a successful pop star/choreographer & flynn’s a record breaking producer/DJ and they’re about to buy a house when they realize they never got married

it’s just a moment where they’re relaxing together on the couch and suddenly are like. oh

and proceed to burst out laughing

it’s a small ceremony, thrown together in just three weeks

carrie wears a short, light pink dress with a heart cutout in the back that would probably be more suited for a high school sophomore’s spring fling but no one cares

flynn wears a suit, and is walked down the aisle by her older sister

they both tear up upon seeing each other and sob through the vows (the traditional pre written ones, they wrote vows for each other but they recite them to the other when they’re alone, so it’s something special only they can share)

julie & kayla are the maids of honor, nick and alex are the best men

julie & luke’s five year old hernando is the ring bearer & alex and willie’s three year old umi is the flower child

trevor, flynn’s older sister and parents cry

even flynn’s now teenage younger siblings, who as of late have often been stereotypically cynical and moody shed tears

jatp perform at the reception (they have also become a hit band at this point)

when they get back from the honeymoon the first thing they do is get a dog

they adopt a golden doodle rescue named stella

a couple years later they start talking about kids and look into getting a sperm donor

because they love being competitive they do little games to decide who will be the one to carry the baby

it’s all jokes though, they decided at the start of the process that it would be flynn for the first kid and carrie for the second

but then SURPRISE flynn has twins

a boy and a girl named tyler and ollie (who’s who i won’t tell you cause fuck gender)

they don’t even talk about carrie getting pregnant now cause they’re busy with the babies and trying to manage their careers but one night, when the kids are eight, and flynn has just flopped onto the couch with a dramatic sigh after putting them to bed, carrie puts down her kindle and quietly says that she wants another kid.

they talk for hours because while flynn wants another kid too, when you’re both celebrities with demanding jobs and people constantly trying to peer into your life, that decision involves even more factors

they decide to have another kid and carrie chooses to take a step back from her career for now-she’ll return to it eventually but for now she wants to be able to just be a parent without worrying about work and not have to deal with the guilt that comes with working when she feels like she should be being a parent

though the kids have always been their main priority and they have done quite well dividing their time between work and being with them, and have done decently shielding them from the public eye (majority of the pictures of ollie & tyler that the public has are blurry candids, and the few high quality ones are from when they were three and they no longer look like that anyway so it’s all good)

it’s a harder process for carrie to get pregnant as she’s almost 40 and flynn was 31 when she had tyler and ollie

but it happens though they’re careful about choosing the sperm donor-even briefly consider asking reggie or nick-because with this kind of thing there’s always the risk that other parent could track down where their kid ended up and want to be a part of that kid’s life later on which is uber complicated for many reasons so they get those scary possibilities out of the way by just finding someone who they know wants to be in the child’s life

preston choi, a thai & korean american mathematics professor ends up being their guy

he’s immensely genuine, sweet, respectful, polite, and gentlemanly

when he came out at fifteen his parents kicked him out of the house

it was a long and difficult journey but they’re in a decent place now

but it’s not the family he wants to have and he’s tried but has yet to find a partner

but doesn’t want to wait to have kids so here he is, more than happy to co parent with flynn and carrie

so that’s what they do! tyler and ollie become big siblings to miles wilson-choi on december 10th, 2044

miles grows up in the most multicultural home ever, being fluent in 4 languages (English, AAVE, Spanish thanks to their tia julie, Korean, and Thai) all their life

tyler & ollie welcome preston and miles into the family with open arms, as well as the addition of korean and thai cuisine to the already amazing dinner tables they had of soul and caribbean food

when miles is seven carrie goes back to work full time, with preston’s assurance that he’s got this when her and flynn are busy and tyler and ollie (who are now fifteen) promising they’ll help out as well

at that point the long awaited julie and the phantoms/carrie and flynn wilson collaboration FINALLY happens

flynn wins her 28th grammy for it, leaving her tied with beyoncé for most grammys won by any woman ever (its julie’s 14th, luke’s 6th, and carrie’s 12th, and the band’s collective 10th cause alex never did any solo projects and reggie released one country album but it didn’t win any grammys rip though it was nominated for 2 CMAs)

[slutauthority]

hi! i was wondering if i might be able to ask you a couple of questions about like. being a bi nb femme? because i know i’m bi and nb, and i’ve never considered being femme before bc i always felt due to internalized stuff (including internalized racism, i’m an indian girl and always felt not like a “real girl”) that i couldn’t try out that label. but lately i’ve felt like i might want to try it out. ig i want to ask what was your femme journey like, and how do i find out if that label is for me

None of that sounds dumb! I’ll share what I can about my experience and feel free to ask questions! These things are allowed to be asked and questioned!

under a read more cause it’s longer : ‘ )

So being femme is not inherent to being “pretty” or “gender-conforming”. The reason femme worked so well for my gender identity is due to my interpersonal relationship, my gender expression and the fact that I’ve been working class my entire life. I like femininity. But it took me a long time to like femininity bc it was so forced on me for a long time in a way that did not resonate with me. I didn’t like my relationship to my femininity. It felt fake and forced.

Once I entered college, I finally came out to ppl and started to dress in a way that was MUCH more expressive of myself. Thrift store dresses and boots, little hearts drawn on my face. Whatever I wanted to do to embody how I felt and how strong I felt. The difference this time was all the femininity wasn’t from a patriarchal CisHet set of ideals. It was gay as FUCK. And with that change came a lot of confidence. I finally felt like myself. I was fun at parties, people wanted to be around me and I enjoyed the attention and being able to garner friendships and relationships. Being femme is not some strict list of what you HAVE to do in order to be such. It’s a feeling. And it’s different for every femme! I take on a femme dynamic in all my romantic relationships with women and bi men. It doesn’t feel at all the type of femininity I was forced into when I was younger. I was sexualized and slut shamed long before I had sex and it was difficult for my self image, also because I hated how I appeared and I just wanted to move out so I could try out something.

I didn’t claim the label for a long time bc of all the discourse I saw on tumblr during my younger bi years. It wasn’t until I moved to Chicago about three years ago and found a really solid community and a found family that I really embraced it. And so did they. I’m femme in the way I walk, talk, take up space. It’s finding power in femininity that gets to be completely your own, rather than something thrust upon you. If you want to try the label, do it! There’s no shame in trying it out and if you find out it doesn’t work or fit for you, that’s okay! But it gets to be yours!

As for feeling inadequate and not “desirable” enough to be bisexual or femme, obviously there is no criteria of desirability you have to meet to be ANY of these. A lot of bisexuals I know have embraced the “slut stereotype” and kind of wear it with a badge of honor. bc you aren’t the only person to tell me they struggle with this, I think some bisexuals who are coming to terms with themselves feel like they HAVE to embrace this idea of “slutty bisexual” which you don’t. But some of us do! That doesn’t make either of us MORE or LESS bisexual! Just like there’s no right way to be a lesbian or a gay man or trans! it’s yours!

I struggled for a looooong time with people not taking my bisexuality seriously. It was either ignored or fetishized. And that got me stuck in a lot of self-hate.

If I’m being completely honest, the one thing that made me confidently bisexual and femme and sex positive was therapy. My therapist is a lesbian and most of her trauma clients are LGBT. She was able to help me garner a sense of security and identity. I have never felt more like myself than in this point of my life. That shit is not easy. It takes a good and loving support system to help keep that spirit up. Because I still struggle with internalized biphobia! It doesn’t just magically go away.

Bisexuality and femmes in general do not have to fit a certain expectations to be bi or femme. Your desirability isn’t up to anyone else. It’s up to you whether you want to exude that or not. I emphasize that this is PERSONAL and not every experience is going to be the same. But I think a good start is giving yourself permission to experiment and explore!

[sweet-xoxo-thatcares]

When I Dated a Trans Man and Pan Guy

Why did you made me think that I had to be a man, dress like a man, talk like a man...just to be loved or even liked by a person like you?

Why did you think it was ok to make me question my gender, my sexuality, my appearance?

Just because you think that I don't look gay enough as a feminine woman, doesn't mean you get to call the shots and tell me who to be to be loved.

Cause truth is, you never loved yourself as a woman, as a they, and probably not as a trans-nonbinary. I hope you do one day.

And that you learn to stop "suggesting" other people to change, so you don't have to feel so dumb and naive about not knowing who you are. Well lets be honest, you changed and you probably were hoping I would want to change to.

To be a trans man. I can't be that. Thats not who I am. And I can't do that for you. And neither can she. You can't make us change, so you don't have to go through it alone. No one is making you, its you who doesn't feel right in your own body, so why attack us too?

Dysphoria doesn't give you the right to hate on other women's bodies just because you want to be a man and you hate the body you were born into.

Im sorry if this makes you upset, but I'm not gonna just let you tear my walls down that protected me for so long. Cause I hear little girls who used to say my legs looked manly, and that I dressed like a tomboy.

I don't believe that God made me a woman with manly legs to influence me to change into a man. My legs are strong and I'd like to keep them that way. My daddy gave them to me for a reason.

But this is where it stops. No more liking people who want me to change any parts of myself so they can just love me or just have sex with me. Im not a customizable toy.

No man, no woman, or whatever gender you identify as....don't criticize your partners for not being manly enough or not being feminine enough. If they came that way, don't try to change us. If you want to be with a stud, don't date a femme and try to change her into dressing up like that for you and she's not comfortable with it. Don't suggest that a person should be gender fluid like its a costume. Let them decide in their own way and change into who they want to be or dress the way they want to.

Telling them how to dress is controlling. Telling them to only be into certain people so you feel more comfortable about their sexuality, is controlling. Telling them that they're only half-gay or maybe you should change your label, is condescending and disrespectful.

If you have insecurities about who you're with and you guys views on values, sex, love, intimacy, and gender do not match. They're not a good match. There's other fish in the sea to be find more capability to your liking.

I'm just so tired of running into the same type of women and then certain bisexual dudes, who won't just admit that they can't have sex with just you as a girl. This is what happens when you date or get involve with the wrong people for you. They're just not meant for me, even though I actually did try to change for them.

Flushing down old ideals, letting in new, more healthy, secure lovers who actually do appreciate me the way I am as a woman who sometimes wears slouchy clothes and mens shirts to work. I mix it up, but I know who I am. I can't be more than 2 people for one person, that's literally impossible. Im not a man and a woman combined. Im just me.

[werevulvi]

I'm going back to labeling myself a trans man, and it's not just for practical reasons. Let’s dive into that for a moment.

Well, first off, I don't want to medically detransition, as it turns out. I explored that option upon recovering from my past traumas and cleaning up my internalised misogyny, 2 years ago, but ultimately I'm still dysphoric about my sex, and feel... I dunno, spiritually soothed, perhaps, by continuing looking like a man, and I wish to go back to living socially as a man as well. I don't hate being female, not at all. It's wonderful to be of the female sex, and I can appreciate it now, but only on the condition that I get to look physically masculine and pass as male. That's my aesthetic, and it's my literal appearance. So I'm embracing that too.

However, I don't feel good trying to force myself into the social role of womanhood, what "woman" means to almost everyone I meet in my day to day life. That social expectation of me to look a certain way, act a certain way, want certain things, dislike other things, and so on. That is what I need to take a step away from. People seem to be incapable of respecting transition choices the moment I call myself a woman, which hurts. I understand that 99% of my social dysphoria is literally just wanting to escape misogyny, but so what? That's just common sense, to wanna escape/avoid misogyny when being female. Don't blame me (or any other female) for wanting to get away from that. Blame men.

Genderwise though... I don't know what even is "gender" but for me, I'd say it's a strong inner desire to live as male and look like a man with male sex characteristics - or in blunt wording for those of you who are wilfully obtuse around here: a wish to immitate maleness and live as a fake man. Clear enough? I hope so. I don't "feel male" or anything dumb like that. I just wanna look as if I'm male and let others believe that's what I am, which comes with no effort at this point in my transition. I just exist as I am, and people read me as male. And I love just existing, comfortably like that. Not shaving, or monitoring my voice, or anything.

And by "living as a man" I mean talk about myself as a (trans) man, going by a male name (whenever I decide for one, although I have a suggestion in mind, however I will keep my original female names as middle names), telling my friends and family that I'd wish to go by he/him pronouns again, and just... kinda ride on that sorta wave. I don't mean acting some kinda role of stereotypical masculinity or forcing my ass into male only spaces. Except for bathrooms, for what should be obvious practical reasons, considering my appearance. I'd rather be an illusion among men then than freak women out. I still prefer gender neutral bathrooms whenever I can access them, but that's not always an option. Such is life.

I feel good simply thinking of myself as a man, even though I know I'm not literally male, and don't particularly want to be anymore. I'm transmale, and that's what I want to be, so it makes sense to call myself a trans man then. It calms and soothes me to just allow those feelings to exist within me, and nurturing them. As soon as I did, a feeling of relief snuck up on me, and a couple of days ago it hit me very strongly. Somehow I became a trans man in denial at 9 years into my transition. Because that's how much I hate being trans and wish I wasn't. But I've always known that's not something I can beat out of myself. Yet, that's exactly what I tried to do. I don't know how that happened, but I need to stop suppressing how much I want to live as a man. Which isn't a bad thing to do. I cannot believe that's bad when I no longer hate or try to escape my femaleness.

Because I wanna be openly trans and hold onto my lesbian label. Because I'm still a homosexual female, no matter what I call my gender, and that is an important aspect of me. I only have the capacity to be attracted to people of my own bio sex, including other trans men. My girlfriend is also a lesbian, and honestly I love her for that (among many other things, of course.) I know that she's attracted to me because I'm female and have a pussy, and I'm totally fine with that. I'm gonna keep my pussy (no SRS ever), I'm not dysphoric about it anymore, and I love that she loves it too. It makes sex so much better, lol.

I feel honoured being the only 'man' my girlfriend could love. It's not at all "invalidating" that she's not into bio men, because I honour my female sex in my own ways, and I wouldn't want to be loved for something I am not. I'm proudly female and FtM, embracing both those aspects of my transitioned body and my trans life. Although I still need to work more on accepting myself for being trans, it's getting better fast by just being very kind to myself and allowing myself to feel.

I'd say I'm a bit of a cusper between femme lesbian and trans man, as odd as that may seem.

I wish I could be a butch, because I look up to butches a lot, but honestly? I'd rather date them, and I only feel natural being on the receiving end of chivalry, so I'm a natural femme. Being both feminine and sex dysphoric is and has always been very confusing and difficult for me, but it doesn't have to be. I can just be a feminine, lesbian trans man and not give a shit. Because why not? (Truscum, don't even bother answering that question, it's rhetorical.) So yes, I happily encourage my girlfriend to hold onto her lesbian label as well. We are a lesbian couple for as long as we're together, and I want for us to stay that way. But yes, we are also straight-passing, which I quite like.

Because of reconnecting with my transsexualism, I will (when I get the energy to) unfollow radfem blogs that lack basic respect for transitioned people (I may bypass the occasional misgendering as well as some trolling, but calling trans people gross and mutilated is not okay and I've thoroughly had enough of it) and try to clean up what I reblog in the future. I'm still gender critical and radfem, but not that ass-deep in it anymore.

Also, if any other radfem/gender critical FtM's just so happen to stumble upon this, I'd love to hear from you if you have any advice on how to balance being radfem/GC with being trans. I may be an idiot, but I've been fumbling in the dark about this and shooting myself in my own feet for far too long. I still barely even know how it's possible to be both trans and GC, lol. Basically how to gender without gender?

[romancingromanoff]

Pride and Joy (Natasha x f!reader)

Author’s note: Pride is first and foremost a celebration we are privileged to have because of the bravery and sacrifices of so many. It was black trans women that lead the Stonewall Riots back in 1969 and yet black trans women remain some of the most vulnerable in our community. We need to step up. I’ve linked some petitions and places where you can donate at the end of this post so please, please, please, don’t ignore them.

Plot: Two gay girls head to Pride and you end up gaining some attention. Also this one is super cheesy but I’ve just got to accept that cheesy is my go-to style ugh. I also used she/her/hers pronouns for this one but if you’d like for me to do gender-neutral or use any other sort of pronouns just let me know and I’d be glad to do so :)

The cafe door swung open again and two new voices came under her radar.

“I’m telling you, every year this is THE spot to pick up cute femme girls.”

“I’m sorry, but did you miss the group of straight white frat boys obnoxiously ingesting natty light across the street?! They’re completely killing the vibe. Honestly, it should be a crime for the straights to show up here.”

“No, that’s the point,” the first person began to explain before lowering their voice to only a few notches above a whisper. “Brad and Chad over there hit on the stray femme girls with the whole ‘Oh, you just haven’t been with the right guy yet’ spiel and then try to convince them that they can change their mind. That’s when we step in, put them in their place, bruise their masculinity a bit, and ba-da-bing ba-da-boom, you’re the hero and you get to sweep her off her feet.”

“Jen, you’re a genius.”

“I know that’s what I’ve been telling you! Now buy me some iced coffee cause I’m broke.”

It was an solid plan that the pair of friends obviously didn’t want anyone else to overhear. Fortunately for them, Natasha couldn’t care less. As she continued to sit there sipping on her tea, no one would suspect that she was a former assassin casually eavesdropping into every individual conversation going on. It was technically her day off, but hey, she had time to kill while she was waiting and not much to entertain herself with. So Natasha silently applauded the two and continued on with her crossword puzzle. 

The parade wasn’t normally her scene, but the redheaded avenger knew she just couldn’t say no to her girlfriend who was ecstatic about her first Pride. 

“Nat, pleeeeeeeassee???” You had begged her all the way up till the night before to go with you. “I was kidding with the matching shirts. You don’t have to wear it, just please come.”

“Fine,” she gave in with a playful roll of her eyes. “But just so you know, it’s going to be crowded, loud, and you’re going to get pretty sweaty. I know you want to wear those rainbow slip-ons Bucky got you for Christmas but please don’t. They offer zero support for your arches.”

Natasha then continued to lecture you on safety 101. Don’t put your phone in your back pocket, blah blah, don’t wear a backpack, blah blah blah. It was a lot to follow just to make sure your paranoid girlfriend didn’t have to worry about you, but you knew it was all out of love. Unfortunately, the one thing you’d forgotten about before leaving the house was going to the bathroom, which is why the two of you had made a pitstop at a small corner cafe.

“The girl who just came out of the bathroom,” the voice that belonged to Jen almost caused Natasha to jolt. “See what I mean?”

“Yeah, she’s cute,” the other one woefully confirmed that they were, indeed, talking about her girlfriend.

You were dressed down in a white “Love is Love” t-shirt that sported two rainbow stick-women holding hands under a rainbow. It was supposed to go with Natasha’s matching black one but she was very against supporting capitalist corporations that sought to make money off of Pride Month merchandise. The rest of your outfit’s ensemble consisted of your favorite pair of shorts and some comfy white sneakers but the real show-stopper was your hair. It had taken hours of braiding to weave your hair so intricately into the flower crown that had taken even longer to craft. You were excited to show off your DIY project you’d had pinned on Pinterest for the last few years even if Nat hadn’t understood the hype.

“Sweetheart, you’re putting hours of work into this thing. I know you like doing it but we can just buy you one and save you the trouble.”

“That’s not the point, Nat,” you sighed never looking up from the hot glue gun you were trying to wield. “I get that I might not be super gifted when it comes to creative things like this but I’ll just feel proud of myself knowing I did it when it’s all put together.”

And right now, Natasha was really wishing she had pushed back harder and gone with the store-bought crown because you were standing there looking like a woodland fairy princess with your bubblegum lipgloss and GODDAMNIT why did her girlfriend have to be so freakin adorable all the time!?? 

You were still searching the crowd as Natasha’s blood began to boil. Jealousy urged her to march straight up to you and begin making out, claiming you as hers in front of everybody. Then the two of you would storm out of there, confront the gross heteros that would undoubtedly hit on Y/N, she’d beat them up and it’d be a solid victory for the badass super spy. A possible bonus could be that you get too frazzled and end up going home early.

But then she hesitated thinking that maybe you wouldn’t appreciate that. “No,” she thought to herself and calculated a better plan. “That’s possessive, gross, and directly from the straight male playbook. I love Y/N. I respect her. And holy fuck I guess I really am just gonna do this.”

Nat’s eyes ironically enough lit up at that same moment when you finally spotted her and waved eagerly with a giant smile on your face. She wasn’t too ecstatic about what she knew she had to do, but she knew it would make you happy.”

“Hey babe!” you greeted her with your full attention. It was clear from your demeanor that you were oblivious to the fact Jen and quite possibly many others were checking you out. “I’m ready to go now.”

“Actually, I think I might have to go too, but wait here,” Nat casually mentioned before slipping into the bathroom. That caught you off guard and you figured something was going on. Natasha never had to go to the bathroom. I mean, she did have to go, obviously, but it was never random and certainly never in public restrooms. Your anxiety began climbing as you went through all the scenarios in your head. Could it be that something was about to go down? You were sure that she had it handled but it bothered you slightly that she hadn’t told you ahead of time. Unless it was something more serious and urgent? There was that one time you two had gone on a day cruise but ended up getting airlifted out of the ocean when Nat ran into some Serbian gun traders. Your stomach was doing flips out of fear that you all might be in danger as you hesitantly knocked on the door.

“Nat, is everything okay?” you shook. “I don’t want to stress you out if you have some important stuff to do, but I am a little worried that-”

Door swung open and there she stood: Your gorgeous girlfriend, NOT suited up, but in fact wearing the matching black t-shirt.

“Seriously?! You know that you almost gave me a heart attack over here!” you half cry half beam with joy at the sight of your girlfriend laughing hysterically at you.

“I know and I’m sorry babe,” she kissed you sweetly on your forehead. “But these girls over there were checking you out and I had to make a quick change into this.”

“But you actually brought it? Sam didn’t have to do like a fly-by and drop it off to you in super stealth mode?”

Her reaction to your question was too good. “No, of course I brought it. We used the same bathroom right? You know there’s no window in there. How would Sam even be able to-”

You interrupt her with a quick peck on the lips. “Shut up and stop making me feel dumb, I’m just touched that you brought it and have it on now. We’re gonna get such great couple photos!”

“Oh shit, they’re definitely together,” Natasha could overhear Jen’s friend comment from across the cafe.

“I mean that sucks but also they make such a cute couple!” Jen unknowingly complimented the two which made Natasha laugh quietly to herself. She really had no reason to feel threatened or insecure about her relationship. Y/N was an amazing girlfriend and if there were any areas of improvement then they’d probably be on Natasha’s side. The spy then made a mental note to show appreciation for her more before remembering another detail.

“Actually, do you mind going out the back door? There’s just a sleazy group of straight guys out there hitting on women that I don’t care to run into.”

“Ew, let’s definitely do that,” you agreed wholeheartedly. “You know guys like that deserve to be put in their place.”

“Don’t encourage me,” Nat bit her bottom lip, ever-so tempted. “Because I was considering that at first.”

“No,” you grabbed her arm twisting her back around to you. “We should go over there and see if they actually have the nerve. And if they do, you beating them up honestly sounds super hot right now.”

“Wait, I thought you didn’t condone violence,” Nat raised an eyebrow at your proposition.

“Normally I don’t. But you’d look so cute doing it in our matching t-shirts!”

Nat rolled her eyes, smiling, thinking of how proud she was of her girlfriend.

LINKS

Petition for Justice for Tony McDade: https://www.change.org/p/justice-for-tony-mcdade

GoFundMe for Tony McDade's Funeral and Family: https://www.gofundme.com/f/in-memory-of-tony-mcdade

Petition for Justice for Dominique Fells: https://www.change.org/p/philadelphia-police-department-justice-for-dominique-fells

GoFundMe for Dominique Fells' Funeral Costs: https://www.gofundme.com/f/dominiquefells

Petition for Justice for Riah Milton: https://www.change.org/p/liberty-townships-board-of-trustees-justice-for-riah-milton-womanmurdered-in-liberty-township-ohio

[okidenshi]

Being a lesbian and also autistic, I’ve always had like. an interesting relationship with my gender- like when i was a kid i was really comforted when i heard about the term tomboy, and i described myself as such for a long time.

And like, i definitely also went thru that mindset that most women do where you just, despise everything associated with traditional femininity because obviously liking the color pink and wearing ugg boots meant you were “giving into the patriarchy” or whatever nonsense have you.

Tho my last two years of highschool, i realized that’s bullshit and i should live to do Girly Things if that’s what made me happy, and be unapologetic about it. And i was, i wore make up a lot and wore pinks and went to Starbucks and went to prom- and i loved it, i truly felt comfortable during that time. Now i had times were i would dress in flannel and jeans and shit cause i also knew i liked to look futchy too, but yea for the most part i was very feminine, and i was happy to express myself that way.

But... that being said, as I’ve lived outside of high school, i do wonder sometimes how much of that joy i felt about dressing that way came from the confirmation from others that i was doing a great job of fitting in with how girls are expected to dress an act. As an autistic person, trying to fit in socially is a struggle, and when we do it right, we are often praised by others and our own minds for doing so.

While that can be harmful for autistic ppl in general, being queer on top of that might also give the person (in this case.... me lol) a warped sense of gender identify and expression. On the side of my autism, there’s a desire to chameleon myself into society, and there is joy in successfully doing so, but that joy is, overall, short lived. As much as i like to Look Good, my first need as an autistic person is to feel comfortable in what i’m wearing. Even if i feel good wearing feminine clothes, the dread i eventually develop over having to wear clothes that are Nice Looking over a sweat shirt and loose jeans... it builds up, and eventually i think you can experience burn out from it.

But that’s the sensory stuff; i still acknowledge that, most of the time, i do have a desire to express femme-like. I like long hair, i like putting on short shorts and having round thighs and sleek shoulders an a softer face and wearing flowing dresses

And to be fair, I still adore the futch and butch Looks as well, and i often find myself yearning to chop my hair shorter and wear loose jeans and denim jackets and fingerless gloves. Like, the amount of times I think of Ellie from TLOU and just go “wow, i just wanna look like that” is quit often lol.  

But still, you can be a woman and dress masculine and feminine, i know that.

So....... why do i also find myself seeing men or male characters and thinking “god, if only i looked like that”? What about Frodo’s sharp jawline yet gentle voice and soft eyes made me think “thats me”, was there something about Danny Phantom’s clone being a girl and him being a man that made me so entranced as a kid when i saw it, why is it when i look at Cloud Strife in a dress do i ponder “is this what people mean when they say they experience gender euphoria?”

The idea of being a “man” or presenting masculine while not identifying as a woman or a man has been a off and on question since i was about 14, maybe even younger but 14 was when i had better terminology to think about it.

I don’t.... think i want to be a man, no, i don’t really like how that sounds or feels. I’m... ok with being a woman, but there are times were i dont really want to be a /woman/. I just want to be a body, a blank canvas to express a look or idea in that moment, and when i’m done with it, i have a “home base” gender to return to, something i’ve known and that i find familiar and safe. 

But yea... it’s confusing, and sometimes i feel dumb for thinking or talking about it, but it was been on my mind a bit the last.... while i guess??

Idek what terms to use. like.... technically i’m nonbinary, like by what i just described, you’d think that’s how i’d identify, but for some reason using that term doesn’t feel right for me. But i’m not a Woman either, i’m like?? a Queer Woman, yknow?

Sometimes i wonder if my sexuality is also just what i want my gender to be which i KNOW sounds ridiculous because they are two separate things but its just a thought i had. Like... women, yes, but. Queer about it.

Pronouns are also Wild, like i use she/her and honestly, even tho im like... and off-brand queer “woman”, i really do prefer she/her. They/them and he/him and other pronouns i’ve seen dont Feel Right, so um............. she/her will probably always bee the pronouns i use tbh. Maybe its my autism brains just liking familiarity, but they feel most comfortable to me even if im Not Exactly A Woman. 

Anyway...... this probably made no sense, but it was just on my mind i guess. TLDR; my gender’s just my name at this point and sometimes i think i wanna be a Boi but ehh?? eehmhmmmklsjdfl yknow?

[got2ghost-archive]

ten ships and why!! I was tagged by @alienfuckeronmain AHH THANK U I LOVE TALKING ABT THIS SHIT

Half of my list is childhood best friends to lovers let's GOOOO

1. drarry

*deep shuddering inhale* I have thought abt draco and harry being foils before I even reached double digits. they could have saved each other and had so much potential to even just be FRIENDS!! if j*r wasn't like that, then she could have actually made a meaningful impact on draco early on. abt how you don't have to be your parents! and how to heal!! anyway I love them any way shape or form. I love reading dark gritty fucked up stories about them just as much as I love reading domestic silly fluffy stuff for them. draco would NOT put up with harry's bullshit and harry would NOT go easy on draco either but they're ultimately just two lonely boys who grew up in fucked up households who have much more in common than they realize!!! LIKE!!

2. wangxian

yes they're a new one but God their love extends so deeply. yes they r basically Chinese fantasy Kirk/spock!!

lan zhan is so in love w wei ying and is so devoted and everything he does is action or acts of service which js very much my love language!! but he also feels a deep sense of obligation to the rules and codes he's learned?? and wei ying loves lan zhan but it takes him a long time to accept it bc he DOESNT BELIEVE HE IS DESERVIG OF LOVE despite being so GOOD. AND THEY NEVER TALK TO EACH OTHER OR COMMUNICATE THEY WAY THEY SHOULD!!!! AND HE DIES and LAN ZHAN IS JUST. REPENTENT FOR 16 YEARS AND RAISES HIS SON AND IS SO INCREDIBLY SAD AND MISERABLE BUT THEN WWX comes BACK TO LIFE and they get to try again AND THEY GET TO BE HAPPY???? ANYWAY ACTS OF DEVOTION I!!!!

3. soriku

I've genuinely thought abt them since I was TEN when the first kingdom hearts game came out but it didn't solidify until KH2 came out when sora has to search for riku the entire game and when he finally does RIKU DOESNT EVEN LOOK LIKE HIMSELF BUT SORA STILL RECOGNIZES HIM ANYWAY AND HOLDS HIS HAND AND CRIES. THAT SHIT MADE ME GAY! I had never witnessed such tenderness and they are so inherently queer and subtle that it's one of the first stories I ever saw myself in. on top of that I also read that doujinshi that I consider Canon and it's so!! childhood best friends! with big complicated feelings of jealousy and betrayal and possessiveness when you start to grow apart from the person you care about the most!! and in game they're slowly... circling to become end game? the entire story revolves around them saving each other and RIKU LITERALLY CALLING SORA HIS MOST PRECIOUS PERSON? AHHHHHH

4. sterek

I will never forgive what the show did but the Fandom and the writing from that fandom is incredibly important to me. they're like my comfort pairing and I just love that Derek is sad and grumpy but it's because he's fucked up and needs to go to therapy and stiles is also kind of fucked up but happier and he's smart and beautiful and!!! they were obviously attracted to each other!! almost all of their stories involve CONSENT or Derek hale getting better slowly. they mean a lot to me bc my mom was dying while I clung to this fandom and wrote my grief fic and I always associate them with that time in my life. I could and did read like 30 stories abt Derek doing laundry and buying wooden spoons and trying to move on and be a healthier happier person.

5. taagnus

rarely have rare pairs but this is one of them and!!! look. I didn't ship them until the last two arcs of the show revealed that instead of only knowing each other for a few years and being idiots they in fact knew each other for 100 years+ and DIED A LOT together and saved each other. BUT COULDN'T REMEMBER IT YET THEY STILL KIND OF... FALL IN LOVE AGAIN? they balance each other so much. magnus is magnus - brave and GOOD. taako is so closed off, careful abt trusting people so when he acted on gut instinct to LITERALLY THROW HIS SOUL OUT OF HIS BODY TO SAVE MAGNUS I was hooked. I know that taako ends up w kravitz but bc we didn't get to see Krav much I couldn't grow attached to him? I love the thought of first love and exploring that - how it never goes away, really but you can still love other people!! plus! I love writing them as lesbians! they're butch/femme to me!

6. ruth/debbie

UGH. UGH!!!!! they're so obsessed with each other and it's so filled with repression and anger and betrayal thst has nothing to do with Ruth fucking her husband and everything to do with the trust of their friendship. it's such a complicated weird fucked up intense 'friendship' that I love to see and like!! sometimes my friendships w women FELT like that. the times I have felt the most hurt is when I lose a friend bc a part of me is in love w them in some way!! Ruth and Debbie are just. in love. though. and Ruth is never gonna admit it and she's gonna... be in a comp het relationship even tho she thinks Debbie is smart and sexy and she idolizes her GOD.

7. gene/finny

YES MOST OF MY PAIRINGS ARE SAD WHAT OF IT? I read this book as a sophomore in hs and I simply could not stop thinking abt how gay and in love they were. FIRST OF ALL THE metaphors!!!!!! gene as winter and finny as summer!! and how codependent and weird they were even tho finny KNEW gene broke his leg. he didn't want to believe it bc he WAS IN LOVE WITH HIM. THEY WENT ON A DATE TO THE BEACH? THE PINK SHIRT? finny being the embodiment of childhood innocence and Gene literally breaking that? and killing it? once again I just love reading abt how complex jealousy is and where it comes from and also REPRESSION!!!

8. forrden

yes I'm including my own OC with @dosalesbian

I wrote abt them for FOUR YEARS. they're childhood best friends who fall in love and marry and are in love no matter what universe and are so soft and tender and healing. forrest goes thru a lot of gender exploration and aiden is just the partner I want to be!! he's goofy and LOVES HER SO MUCH AND SUPPORTS HER SO MUCH GOD!!!!

9. kuroken

they r a new one and yes once again childhood best friends but in a FUN NEW WAY that I want to explore. kenma is like disinterested in most things except gaming and whatever kuroo wants to do and has a hard time socializing bc he's SHY and is too observant! and kuroo is big and dumb and passionate but was also a stupid anxious child. I think they're those friends who are dating but don't even know they're dating or their relationship is so indescribable to themselves and others that it's hard to take any step forward or backward bc theyre SO codependent and yes. I want to explore that and read abt them more.

10. don't look at me yes im putting ryden on here

THEY WERE IN LOVE BUT COULDNT ADMIT IT AND THEN BRENDON WROTE 3 BREAKUP ALBUMS ABT RYAN? AND RYAN RELEASED A SONG THE SAME WEEK BRENDON GOT MARRIED? they're never gonna be friends again bc they can't just be friends

okay!! I tag @scottspack @dosalesbian @pattern-pals hehe