#I'll never forget it now

[mx-lamour]

I noticed a new detail in I, Strahd that has me screaming.

So I'm doing a critical writing essay on the way that P. N. Elrod uses the first-person perspective in I, Strahd to enhance the narrative, with Strahd himself as, you know, the unreliable narrator of his own life (which just... mmm! It's so good).

And I'm just going back through the book to look for the page number where he says, "That's what I told myself, anyway."

But, I then found this instead:

You would spill my blood, armsman?

HOLD. THE F**K. ON.

armsman???

So I rifle back through the pages, because that is not what he said. That's not the quote. It's Commander. It's "You would spill my blood, Commander?"

And I find it. And I'm right.

OOGH.

Oh, does it hurt.

Strahd is removing himself from Alek in this moment. He's taking him down already in his mind. Trying to make Alek less important, so that it's less of a blow to himself when he kills him, just a moment later.

Commander is a title, and one of respect. It shows that Alek occupies an important position. And even that, I realize now, was a point of distance, because the two of them often do call each other by their given names. When Strahd was in danger of assassination, Alek yelled "Strahd!" multiple times, which is very personal. When they were out on tour, dealing with the local burgomasters, Alek got perhaps a little too excited and Strahd chided him by just quietly saying his name, "Alek."

When he called Alek "Commander", Strahd was hanging over the edge of a cliff to grab his hand, almost ready to die himself if Alek fell. Alek was in danger of death. In that moment, Strahd chose to focus on the fact that he might lose a leader in his ranks, rather than a close personal friend. It was a little bit of distance, so that he could focus on the task in front of him. To keep his head in that unexpected crisis.

When Strahd calls him "armsman", though... Alek is now faceless. He has been stripped of name. He has been stripped of rank. He has been stripped of all personal attachment. Because that is what Strahd needed to do in order to complete the task ahead of him.

Alek has also just stabbed him in the chest, when Strahd inaccurately recalls that moment, and they are both in shock. Given a chance, Alek would never have done this. "Only a drop or two," he had answered, dangling from the cliff, "if it spares the rest, my lord." (Alek follows his lead in this act of distancing. "Didn't have to, my lord," he murmurs this time.) It can't be Alek, so this is just another soldier. This is just another fight. It's just another war.

So, Strahd thinks of him as "armsman" here, to avoid a truly devastating layer of grief.

Neither of us had a choice. That's what I told myself anyway.

The quote I was looking for is on page 137. One page before all that.

[almond-gallery]

an enjolras because i miss him

[ksturf]

a tribute to the one and only david keith mccallum [19.09.1933-25.09.2023 ∞]

[deoidesign]

Portrait of a vampire

Photo of a werewolf (who doesn't trust cameras)

As a treat I like to paint my characters realistically from time to time... so I can see them...

Webcomic

[piningpercussionist]

Weed smoking girlfriends! But they can just be hanging out if you prefer ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Happy 4/20!

[silusvesuius]

stuff heavily referenced from clive hicks-jenkins' art cus i've been rly into it lately 🥰

cute idea scribblings for the last drawing..lol

[somegrumpynerd]

PLEASE DRAW COLOR PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

(Not forced)

Sometimes I get the impression people wanna see me draw things, no idea where must just be cause I'm such an empath-

Pfff yes chef one lil firey boy right away! o7

And of course the greatest honour I can bestow upon a character: cuddling

[tsuyu-chan-kun]

[guardian-angle22]

Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) | December 2021

[hussyknee]

PSA: Please for the love of God stop using the word "cretin". It's a slur for people born with congenital hypothyroidism (CHT, that used to be called cretinism) that causes physical and intellectual disability.

I think it's unrealistic to expect a blanket moratorium on insults about intelligence, but words like "mong/mongoloid" (anti-Asian slur later applied to people with Down Syndrome), "spaz", "downie", "midget" and "cretin" refer to people born with specific developmental disorders. If you care enough not to use the "r–word", please steer clear of these as well.

[hyakunana]

Durge, the Dark Urge — but make it a bard forest gnome girl named Imbrie

[lunarharp]

revamped looong mermaid orufrey au :')

[deoidesign]

Just a reminder, I have a patreon!!!

I've been working on actually making stuff to post more often for the lower tiers, and have been consistently doing so!

I post at least a few sketches and drawings every month for the $1 and up patrons

and I've been working on episodes and sharing some updates with my $5 and up patrons

And I have a merch club for $15 a month, but there's still some $10 slots left! I design and send usually a postcard and some stickers to my patrons every month, but sometimes I'll do some experimental stuff; last month I did foil prints, for instance, and a few months before I made magnets!

It also gets you access to private channels in my discord server, where I ask for patron input on things like the merch or drawings, and where I sometimes stream while working :)

Buuuut also, even if you don't want any of this stuff, it's a great way to support me directly if you like my work! I'm still on hiatus so I'm not making any money from work at the moment, but I'm working hard and my patreon enables me at least to buy my groceries!

Here's the link one more time, no pressure of course but I need to promote my patreon more so people actually know it exists haha

[pod-bird]

Them: single narrator podcasts are scientifically bad

Me: sorry I can't hear you over the sound of extremely talented creators voicing all of the characters in their podcasts, each easily identifiable and distinct

[meowfountain]

kris doodles forever and ever

[aro-and-trans-thoughts]

Weirdest trans experience I've ever had: Made new trans friends thinking they also realized I'm trans too and then a month later I say smth about hrt and they go "I THOUGHT YOU WERE CIS????"