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#I'm honestly glad we're moving on
gale-force-storm · 2 months
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Update for anyone curious:
We did find a new apartment! It's not ideal, but it's within our budget and flexible, which were the two biggest requirements. However, that means we really have to ramp up on packing, cleaning, etc now, so my posting is gonna be pretty sporadic through the end of the month
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running-in-the-dark · 9 months
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setting up my old phone for my mother rn. she is driving me insane. how can one person contain this much negativity and bitterness? wow.
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tchotchkez · 10 months
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just finished binge-watching the first season of peaky blinders with my grandfather 😭 that was some soul-nourishing family time right there
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neverendingford · 9 days
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,
#tag talk#said out loud “I've felt drunk for the past week” and suddenly realized no you idiot that's dissociation#anyway. I've been floating on clouds for a while and I'm absolutely not complaining it feels nice#restarting my meds is maybe what's doing it.#going off and then back on my meds has just been a wild ride all around#oh well. I gotta stay quirky and weird somehow right?#I've been thinking a lot about my breakup and how it wasn't even because of anything except that I got bored of him#and even playing aoe with him is getting boring cause his skill level is way behind me#the only person who moves the same speed as me is my brother. so I'm gonna go with him wherever he goes#I do like him a lot. but also there's the knowledge that if I don't stick with him I'll be way more lonely#moving out with someone else would guarantee that I'm leaving the only person in life who actually gets me#and I would be depriving him of the only other person who even kind of gets him (I won't say I get him fully cause that's a lil arrogant)#idk. I don't dislike it. but I'm trapped nonetheless. my course in life is laid out for me because I have no one else.#I love him but I wish I had more than one person who I could stand being around longer than a few months#idk. I do feel more conscious right now. more aware. I'm glad I have him.#I just wish I wasn't so fundamentally incompatible with every other person except him.#we're damaged in very similar ways and so we match. even the rest of my siblings don't click with me the same way#I guess I'm lucky to have him. if I didn't I would be 100% dead right now#which... certainly would be the easier simpler option#but oh well. I'm cursed to live on this earth until he eventually offs himself#we have a pact that we're gonna talk about the suicide beforehand to turn it into a murder mystery or something#he said he wants my skull if I go first. which honestly would be cool as hell. I'd be happy with my skull sitting on his bookshelf#he wants to travel and he's lined up to have a good job to let him do that. so I think I'll end up coming along#idk. we're together for life because both of us are so incapable of making other meaningful friendships#even his closest friends bother him constantly and he struggles to connect with them#so we vibe in that regard.#sorry if this is depressing as hell. it's just.. idk. we both are likely and certain that we won't die of natural causes#but life keeps getting better. I've got plans to go back to nursing next year and I'm medicated so I should be able to make it through#I've had my current job for over a year which is a personal record for me so I'm kinda stoked about that#I'm getting bored of it but so it won't last forever but nursing should get me something new to work on
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madesofgold · 7 months
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Don't you wanna live far away from your family and their expectations sometimes and just start a new life?
#i feel so suffocated by my mother#she always gets herself involved in my business and crosses boundaries bc she just can't help herself#and she gets to do it bc i'm home most of the time even tho i have my own apartment but that's also not far away enough#and she still doesn't understand no and how to let me live my own life and she doesn't have to do everything for me#and everyone else i also want to please but i'm also sick of it and even tho they all mean well and they all just want things to go well#i feel so pressured by it and i just wanna get away from them all#but no wonder they all feel so invested in my life bc we're close and i spend a lot of time with my mum and grandparents and 'step dad'#and that's nice and i'm glad we're close and i wanna be but at the same time it means they sometimes just care too much#i guess i shouldn't complain about that like it's a bad thing but it just feels suffocating sometimes#and i don't want to live my life so that they're not disappointed in me and worry about me and so they're satisfied#i've been having the wish to move to another city or country for a while now and i honestly think it would be good for me#and especially me and my mama so that she cannot always get involved and has to accept that she can't control all things#and always try to 'help me'. i'm almost 25 like i need to learn how to live without my mother always being there#and god the urge to move somewhere else is so strong right now#i wish it was that easy to just be able to do it but i'm also anxious and scared and nothing is certain in my life rn#i just want a change though#sorry tumblr i had to let it out somewhere and i don't have therapy right now where i can actually talk about stuff#which maybe i should think about doing again#rambles
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iminyournotis · 9 months
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Block me for saying this, (I believe in ((specifically)) transwomen rights to longevity, respect, and ultimately womanhood,) but you people MUST realize that... Jesus Christ, I don't know why I started this text post, because you assholes are never gonna get it. Some of the "pro-trans" things you guys say pertaining to competitive sports are just... honestly uneducated from a biological, and, quite frankly, feminist standpoint (which was derived from biology, but is not the be all, end all, to women sports,) and it's driving me crazy. Please stop acting like you DEFINITELY KNOW FOR SURE, meaning 100%, what you're talking about on the matter when you (honestly?) don't. The existence of the biological sex of any one individual is not anti-trans is the bottom line. Some of you are acting very, very strange about this.
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mrsrdlw · 7 months
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The “first date”
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summary: After figuring out you liked each other, you and Eddie started dating. Your first interaction wasn’t the way he planned, so he decided to take you out on a proper date.
warnings: MDNI 18+; virgin!reader; fluff; some nerdy references (star wars troop); oral!fem!receiving; shitty writing- sorry about that.
author’s note: Hey guys, i saw how much everyone enjoyed Eddie’s Valentine story so i decided to make a second part. It took me longer then i thought to post this, but my classes at college just started so i’m still adjusting my schedule.
After what happened, you spent the rest of the morning talking in bed. You couldn't believe you actually got the courage to make a move on him. Even if it was to offer a little help with his "issue". And this was one of the many things that surprised you today. The fact that Eddie liked you back was insane. In your mind, Eddie only saw you as a girl friend. A girl he could talk about everything and nothing. Of course sometimes you caught him looking at you in was different way, but you didn't want to get delusional.
And for Eddie, he was meaning to make a move on you since he realized he was head over heels for you. But he honestly thought you would say it was way too weird to be with him this way. In a romantic way. But what is best then dating your best friend. The only thing that changed was the intimacy of things. So that's why he'd never said anything. Till this day.
"How come both of us liked each other but never did anything?" Eddie asked with one arm under his head and the other wrapped around your waist. You were laying on his chest, listening to his heart beating. You don't know how to feel about this yet. Forty minutes ago, you were still "just friends". And now you're all over each other.
"I guess i was just so scared to lose my best friend that I stayed quiet. It was better to have you in that way than not having you at all." You were being honest with yourself and with him, trying to figure it out why have you kept these feelings as a secret.
"Well i'm glad you released your horny devil today" That made you laugh and he joined you. "But to be honest, it's not how i imagined."
"What do you mean?" You got up on your elbows to see his face, a little scared from his confession. Didn't he just said that he liked it?
"I actually imagined that i would have the guts to ask you out and take you in a very nice date. Very romantic. And then, after the normal stuff normal people do, i could actually try to kiss you. But i guess we're not normal." With your eyes locked, he caressed your cheek.
"Yeah, here we start being naughty!" You said in a playful tone with a wicked grin that only made him laugh. You always loved his smile.
"I guess because we took things a little too fast, this is still kind of... unbelievable for me. Do you feel it too?" You asked, concerned you're the only one feeling this.
"Yeah. Kind of. It feels like it's a dream, right?" He asked and you nodded. "But i'm sure this is going to be as normal as last night was. It's just a matter of time. Also, just in case you didn’t realize it yet, you're my girlfriend now lady, you're stuck with me."
"Oh no! What am i gonna do?" You got out of his chest dramatically and he grabbed you again making you laugh
"Really sweetheart, i don't want you to think you'll have to act differently or anything like that. I don't want you to. I like you the way you are. All goofy and funny and sweet ." He said looking at your lips
"Look at you, all over me, aren't ya?" You said as if you weren't feeling the same
"Yeah, you got me."
After that day, you've been dating, and you couldn't be happier. You waited the whole week for saturday, which was the day of your first official date. That's how Eddie called it. Of course, he didn't want to forget what happened in that morning. But he wanted you to feel extra special. Not just some random girl.
So, he decided to take you to the drive in. This events normally happened at summer, but it was just what he wanted. Something simple, but romantic, where you two could spend time together, watching movies and maybe make out in the middle of it. It was a part of your routine together, watching movies. So, in his head, this would make you both very comfortable with the whole situation of the 'first date'.
He parked his van in front of your house right on time. He pressed the doorbell and there you were. With a cute sweater and a skirt. He loved when you wore skirts. It made your legs look so tempting.
"What do you think? Fancy enough for you mister?" You said looking down at your clothes.
"Oh my lady, you look very fancy. Come on, give me a twirl." You did it and, dramatic in his own way, he put his hand on his chest "You look amazing, sweetheart."
"Thank you, Eds" He always loved when you called him like that. Now, it was even more special.
He drove you both to the location. Even though there was a lot of cars in front of you, you had a great view of the screen. It was only ten minutes before the movie started, so he went to buy you some snacks and drinks to survive through the night. It was a marathon of star wars. The three movies. "A New Hope", "The Empire Strikes Back" and "Return of the Jedi".
The sun was starting to set when he came back. His curls in the golden light just made him look more like an angel to you.
"Here you go. I'm pretty sure we can survive with this, but if you want more, just tell me, a'right?" He insisted on buying the food, not letting you pay for anything
"That's perfect, thanks!"
Through the first movie, you didn't say a word, trying to understand everything in the movie. You always found it very confusing. Alright, maybe you were containing yourself to not put your hand on his thigh or your head on his shoulder.
Eddie also stayed in silence, too anxious to do something and fuck up the night. It was not his thing, getting anxious about girls. It was actually something he was confident. But with you, was a whole different story. He wanted to be closer to you. He was trying to find a way to get you to stay closer to him without being desperate. So he started putting one hand in your thigh. Your warm skin contrasted with his cold hand. He didn't missed the way your eyes went wide the second he touched you.
They gave a break of ten minutes to start the second movie. Now it was dark outside.
"Are you sure you don't want anything else? There is a big line there but i can go, if you want." He still had his hand on your tight.
"Yes, there is enough here." You assured him. You could see he was nervous. He’d made the first move… you could only follow his lead. "I'm just wondering here. This is a date, right?"
"Yes..."
"Don't you think this big space between us is useless? You can get closer Eddie." You said leaving his cheeks with the cutest shade of red
"I'm sorry, i didn't wanted to be too desperate" He said putting his arm around your shoulder and, without thinking too much, you placed your head on his shoulder. Eddie was in heaven. He had the girl of his dreams right by his side.
In the middle of the second movie you were still in the same position. You decided to move but, with the sudden shift, you exchanged looks. For the first time of the night, you were inches away from his lips. You couldn't help but want to kiss him so bad. Feeling the same as you, Eddie placed his hand on your cheek and brought you closer until your lips met. His lips were soft. His scent invaded your nose.
Your kiss changed from passionate to desperate very quickly. Your hands got greedy, wanting to touch him everywhere you could. In need to breathe, you separate. Panting in each other's mouth, Eddie hold your face with his both hands.
"I'm sorry sweetheart, i think we can't stay this close. I can't hold myself." He said making you smile.
"I don't think we're going to be able to pay attention on the movie anymore." Giggling, you hold his hands. "What if i said that i don't want you to control yourself?"
He separated a bit more so he could look inside your eyes. His eyes were wide open, shocked.
"I know you wanted to be a gentleman and all, but i've been thinking about this for the whole week. And remember that little horny devil? He's greedy now. More than ever." You said pressing your tights together. You weren't lying. Since he said he was going to take you on a date, you've been expecting for all the things that could happen. And you wanted to.
He was speechless. It was cute.
"I know, maybe i'm being too excited about everything. But i want it and i thought that if i had to wait for you to make a move, we would do it on the seventh date or something" He giggled at that. You were right, he thought. He wanted that too. But he would never force you to do something he knows that you didn't have much experience and you could be a little insecure. He wanted you to feel safe. He finally said something.
"Are you sure? I told you, remember? We don't have to do anything you don't want to. Especially when we're in this kind of ‘first date’ situation where we feel like we have to do stuff." You kissed him again. All you wanted was him.
"I'm sure. You said yourself remember. We’re not like the normal couples."
"Really? You know, we're in a public place ma'am. You little perv." He said making you both laugh
"So... What are your moves, huh? Gonna do it here with my clothes on or you're going to take me to the back?" You pulled his shirt to you and kissed him again.
He took your hand and pulled you to the back of the van. There was some pillows and blankets on the back.
"You were planning to do this?" You asked getting closer to him again
"I was going to take you to stargaze, actually. But you turned me on now. We'll do it later, kay?" And he kissed you.
Your kiss, like before, was hot. Craving for each other's touch. You couldn’t help but smile at the situation. Two horny teenagers in the back of a van making out like your life depends on it. Your hands travel through his chest down to his lower belly, pulling his shirt up.
"I honestly don't believe you when you say to me you're a virgin" You giggle to his reaction but stoped immediately. With his shirt off, his bare torso was in front of you. The black ink contrasting with the pale skin. You could keep looking at him shirtless for hours. But you wanted something else.
He changed your positions and looked in your eyes one more time, asking for your permission. You give it to him not thinking twice. So he takes your sweater and skirt off, leaving you only with your underwear. Thank god i piked matching ones today, you think to yourself. He kept looking to the white cotton set you chose.
“They’re pretty cute” He said earning a slap from you. “Sorry. I meant it, though.”
Smiling at him, you pulled him closer again by his necklace hanging above you only to stop inches from his lips.
“Why don’t you take ‘em off and see how cute i am without any clothes?” You said proud of yourself for being this bold. His reaction was priceless.
His hands were caressing you carefully, every move with love and affection. With you naked in front of him, his instinct was to drown himself in your neck, your chest, belly. Kissing all over your skin, making you squirm. You could feel his body heat hovering over you. Too overwhelmed by his actions, you try to take his pants off. You needed him.
“Easy there. I think we have plenty of time sweetheart.” He said taking your hands in his. He only laughed at the way you pouted. “I want to make you feel good. So why don’t you lay here and relax?” He dropped your hands, not before kissing them, and went down on your body. “It’s the only thing i could do after what you did for me last week. You were so good.” His warm breath hovered your mound and you twitched.
Not wasting any more time, he licked your clit and you gasped. You’ve never got head before. This was a new different thing for you. But oh, how you loved it. You’ve only felt some kind of pleasure there by your own fingers. But the way Eddie’s tongue kept moving and twisting around, it was a new addiction to your list. Your hands were attached to the blanket under you. You were trying so hard to not let any sound slip from your lips.
“Does it feel good?” He changed his tongue for his fingers and smiled to see you struggling to keep quiet. Not able to speak, you only nodded. Deciding to push things a little bit, he thrust his tongue inside you and you couldn’t hold the moan that came from your throat. Eddie lost his mind. He grew his movements faster than before, wanting to hear that again. He was glad that you only let them out now, or he would’ve cum in his pants by then.
Everything was so good. His tongue and fingers on your pussy and his free hand pressing your hip down so you kept quiet in place. His burning gaze on you, his hair tickling your thighs. His hot breath coming out of his nose and hitting your mound. You couldn’t take it anymore. You stopped him and pulled him up. He was confused until you kissed him. You could feel your taste on his tongue and how his chin was wet by your own slick.
“I-I need you inside me” You said gasping for air. Eddie felt his cock twitch in his boxers. Your voice was hoarse by pleasure.
He took off his jeans and boxers, almost falling down. You giggled at his tongue poking out while he searched through his wallet for a condom. “I hope this is not in there for five years. You know, condoms can expire” You joke trying to act casual seeing his dick again.
“Ha ha, very funny missy.” His voice full of sarcasm only made you laugh. He was crawling his way up to you when you both heard it. Dart Vader’s imperial march was playing. Probably the last movie had just started. You cracked, laughing hard at the situation. You even forgot where you were.
“Who are we kidding, of course in our first time having sex, Dart Vader is going to be marching towards us. It’s your fault” He said playfully
“My fault?! Why?” You asked amused
“Because you’re goofy. There’s no other reason.” You looked inside his eyes. Both of you still smiling. You just had to squeeze his arm so he knew he could move. And that’s what he did.
Slowly, his ran his tip against your wet folds and thrusted inside you. You closed your eyes, feeling his length stretching you open. It burned, making tears swell up in your eyes. Once he bottomed out, you both moaned. Giving you a few seconds to get accustomed to this new feeling, he caressed your waist, grounding you back to him.
He started to thrust slowly into you. It felt like your lungs were out of air. With each thrust of his hips, that started to get a rhythm. The muscles of his arms were flexed, his necklace was swinging, and the hands that before were caressing you, were now holding your hips for goddamn life.
“Holy fuck, you’re so tight” His eyes closed for a second, trying to hold his load a little longer. You watched every move of his. He looked amazing. It didn’t take much time for his dick to reach that spot you struggled to find. It drove you crazy. You arched your back and that made Eddie go faster. You were biting your lip but it wasn’t working anymore. If there was anyone around the van, they would probably hear your moans.
Eddie was also a mess. He wanted to freeze this moment in his mind forever. You looked perfect to him. The sounds you were making, his eyes were rolling back. Your boobs were bouncing up and down with each thrust of his. He looked down where your bodies met and saw the bulge in your lower belly, he didn’t know how long he would take.
“You’re doing so good sweetheart” He pressed kisses on your neck. You weren’t able to talk, but you pulled his hair bringing him closer to you, if that was possible. He groaned feeling you clench around him. He could feel how close you were. Once again, he massaged your clit bringing you to the edge. “Come on princess, cum for me. Just let it go” and with that, you were gone.
“Fuck Eddie” Was the only thing you said.
Eddie, Eddie, Eddie
You could only think of him. Your nails scratched his back, your feet pressing on his but so he could go even deeper. Your orgasm washed all over you. With you clenching impossibly tighter around him, Eddie was also gone, cumming hard, biting on your shoulder to control his grutal moans.
When your breathing went back to normal with time, he came out of you taking off his condom and laying by your side.
“You think the van bounced too much?” He said breaking the silence. You laughed at his silliness.
“No. Otherwise people would have come here to ruin everything.” You look at him but he was already looking at you. “They might’ve heard us, though.”
“Nah, they’re nerdy people. They’re probably fantasizing about princess Leia now.” As if if wasn’t a nerd too. “You want to get out of here and go stargazing” He said putting a lock of hair behind your ear.
“That was the plan, wasn’t it?” You pecked him on the lips and got up to put your clothes back on.
And that’s how you wrap up the night. He drove you both to a place where you could see the stars. You kept talking and eating the rest of your candy from the movie. Your first date couldn’t be more perfect than that
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aromantic-diaries · 1 year
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Honestly I'm glad that the aro community is moving from "we still love our friends and family we're not heartless!" to "we don't need to make up for our lack of romantic attraction with other forms of love" because yeah, our platonic and/or familial relationships are not romance-lite or a substitute for romantic love and a lot of aros reject the idea of love altogether. So yeah fuck trying to appeal to alloromantic people with the whole "we swear we're normal" thing. I don't need to make sense to anyone
Either you accept me as I am whether you understand me or not or you leave me the fuck alone
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itsharleystuff · 1 year
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↳ I. 𝘞𝘖𝘙𝘓𝘋 𝘊𝘓𝘈𝘚𝘚 𝘚𝘐𝘕𝘕𝘌𝘙
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Gif not mine! | Read part two here.
— 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dbf!Joel Miller x afab!fem reader (no outbreak au)
— 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.4k
— 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After two years of absence and finally graduating college, it’s time you go back to Texas; to come home with your dad. But the prospect of facing the Joel Miller, your dad’s best friend and your secret crush, has your mind scattered.
— 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: 18+ content (minors dni!), smoking, alcohol consumption, age gap (reader is twenty four, Joel is late forties), oral sex (f! receiving), fingering, spitting, mentions of masturbation, pet-names (sweetheart, darling), moral conflict, semi-public sex, slight dirty talk, pussy-drunk Joel, no use of y/n. I think that’s it, let me know if I missed something:)
— a/n: I honestly have tons of ideas for this particular universe, so I might make more parts if y’all like it<3 btw, reader is a fashion designer in this. Thought it might be important to mention, lol.
✎﹏﹏﹏﹏
You had never met him before. Not in person, at the very least.
Up until a while ago, you'd only seen him in the pictures your dad kept hanging around the house. And he had plenty of those: both of them in college, a road-trip with other friends or even after a hunt. Of course, you'd heard a lot about him too, but whenever you visited Texas your dad would dedicate his whole days to you exclusively. No time to visit his best friend-slash-neighbor, despite all the opportunities presented.
So the first time you ever saw him face to face was two years ago, in a Fourth of July barbecue he hosted.
Joel Miller.
Joel mother-fucking Miller.
Tall, broad, rugged looking, moody and with a seemingly stern exterior. An absolute dilf.
You always found him rather appealing— nothing but a silly little thought from whenever you would stare at the photographs. But meeting him personally was a whole eye-opening experience, like getting glasses after discovering you’ve had astigmatism your entire life.
"He liked you, y'know?" your dad had told you the next day. "Joel isn't usually that nice."
"Maybe it's because I'm your daughter," you joked. "I bet that helped with my impression."
"No," said him, laughing and shaking his head, "it was something else."
You didn't interrogate him on the matter. Whatever it was, you sure were glad to be in his grace.
That summer you saw a lot of him— specially since it was the longest you had spent in Austin ever since your mom passed away. You were twenty two at the time, right in the middle of your college studies. But the amazing thing about Joel was that he never made you feel patronized, neither did he treat you like you had to fit in the 'best friend's daughter' box. He was nice and made you feel comfortable in all ways possible.
Frankly, deep down you wanted him to be an asshole. If that were the case, you could've had the perfect excuse to push him away. Instead, your crush simply grew stronger.
Because, fucking hell, the man was hot in a striking, yet brooding manner. Joel Miller was attractive in the way a man is supposed to be attractive. Which was quite a contrast compared to the boys that usually neared you, who had no sense of themselves and were always fooling around with no idea what they were doing.
It was so bad that even now, after two years without seeing him —or your dad, for that matter— you feel anxious and eager at the thought of a reunion.
You're now officially graduated, and after a lifetime of traveling the states to visit both your parents, added to four years of college in New York, it's finally time to settle down for a while. To move in with your dad and make up for the lost time.
"Are you really going to stay in Texas?" Sophie, your best friend, asked through the phone speaker. "After all these years in the big city?"
"Yeah, I ought to stay with him. After all, we're the only family we've got," you replied, staring out the window of the cab. "When I told him I was coming he got so excited, you should've heard him. He said he'd throw me a homecoming party, can you believe that? Who's even going to attend?"
You hear her giggle on the other side. "What about that Mr. Miller you always brag so much about?"
"What about him?" you wondered with half strained voice.
"Oh, don't play coy, honey," she mocks. "We both know how much you want him to give you a sweet old Texan welcome."
"I have no idea what that is," you respond, smiling.
"I just made it up. No idea what they do in the south. I'm from Brooklyn." Of course she made it up. "But I meant it's pretty obvious how much you want his head between your legs..."
"Okay, yeah- I get it." You interrupt, starting to see familiar houses from your dad's neighborhood. "You're right. But he's... Righteous. Apparently."
"Sweetie, let's be honest," Sophie talks softly, "no man is righteous. Just show them a bit of skin and they'll be wrapped around your finger forever."
"I'm not sure I-"
"Try it. And keep me updated," she mumbles hastily. "I've got to go now. I have an appointment with the Ralph Lauren executives in ten minutes."
"Treat them nicely, Sophie. Don't waste my recommendation letter," the girl laughs.
"Yeah, yeah... I'm serious about Miller, though. Be sure to wear something low-cut. Bye, bye!"
She hangs up right when you're outside the house; the one you knew so well and at the same time felt so unknown. The one where you spend each summer and occasional holiday in. Your childhood home. Oddly enough, the door is open but you can't see your dad anywhere near. You hoped he'd be around to help you with the luggage, though it didn't seem like it.
"Dad?" You call for him from the entrance, carrying both heavy suitcases. "Anyone here?!"
The faint noise of footsteps is barely audible before you see him leaning against the kitchen door, arms crossed over his sturdy chest.
Breathtaking.
"M'not your old man but pretty sure I can help you with that," he says with that characteristic Texan drawl of his, gesturing towards your cases.
"But if it isn't Joel Miller in the flesh," he tilts his head with a faint smile, approaching your side. "You haven't aged a day since I last saw you."
It was true. Perhaps his skin looked a bit more tan, his hair somewhat longer and curlier, his beard starting to gray. But everything else remained the same. He smelled just like you remembered —fresh soap and musky cologne—, and still held onto the same mode choices: flannels, boots and dark jeans.
"Quite the opposite to ya," he says, taking both your suitcases from your hands. "I like your new hair."
"Are you implying I look old?" Joel grins smudgily.
"None of that, darlin'. I'd say mature." His words manage to make your pulse raise. "Shall I take this upstairs?"
"Yeah, I- I'll walk you to my room," he chuckles as he steps on the stairs. "What?"
The man shakes his head as he makes his way to the second floor, followed closely by you. Nothing about this house seemed different. Nevertheless, you felt different.
"Nothing. S'just..." he takes a deep breath, but changes the subject quickly. "Your dad went to the store to get some beers. He'll be back any second."
You nod, opening the door to your dorm. It was exactly the same as it was two years ago, simply tidier and with a poster that read 'welcome home and happy graduation' in messy, colorful handwriting over your bed.
"He made that himself. Though, I've gotta say, I'm glad he didn't pursue an artistic career." You both laugh at the comment.
"A for effort." Joel sets your luggage next to the doorframe, being monitored by your keen eye. "Will I see you tonight? I know you're not a big fan of social gatherings."
"Your dad'll kill me if I'm not. He's got me here since ten o'clock to help him out." You look up at him, feeling vaguely nostalgic when watching your surroundings. "But I'm also hoping we'll catch up. I'd like to hear all about your adventures in the big city, aight?"
"Oh, I'm not sure you'd like that," you retort. "I'm afraid you'll see a side of me you might disapprove of."
Joel's brows shot up in a cocky expression. "And here we were all thinking you were such a nice girl. Forget 'bout me, sweetheart. Your old man would drop dead if he gets the news."
You can't hold back the smirk that spreads across your face as you look him dead in the eye. Truth be told, you had wished for him to change, in any sort of way. Maybe if he had gotten a couple more wrinkles or grey hairs you'd be able to not find him attractive anymore. But age suited Joel. Maybe if he stopped being so warm to you, so kind, it might be able to fade away.
'Righteous', you'd called him.
But he isn't so much. No man ever is.
In your last visit you weren't bold enough with him, but each time you'd say something slightly suspicious, every occasional brush or brief skin to skin contact during a shared moment, had an effect on him. He reacted to you, even if he thought you wouldn't know. Sure, he was well restrained and you probably wouldn't have noticed if you weren't actually looking for any signs. That didn’t change the facts, anyway.
"I've never really been much of a nice girl, to be honest," you retaliate, dragging the words. "But I bet you can keep a secret, can't you?"
Something in your voice causes him to unconsciously stop breathing. His brows knit together and it takes him a second to regain composure. However, he doesn't get to say a thing, your dad's voice suddenly floating from the floor beneath.
With your blood rushing, you practically flee downstairs, seeing his face change completely at the sight of his beloved daughter.
"You're here early, what the heck?" The man mumbles with a kindhearted smile, embracing you in a tight hug.
"Figured I might surprise you." The boxes of beer he bought were quickly discarded when he saw you. "So, are you surprised?"
"Very. But I was supposed to pick you up at the airport. Did you take a cab?"
"Don't worry about that," you reassure with a gesture. "It was included in the airport bill."
"Oh, man..." your dad turns to see his friend, "you leavin' already?"
"I have to pick up Sarah," he explains, peeking at his watch. "She had soccer practice today."
"Can I expect to see her later, too?"
Joel nods at your question, faintly beaming. "F'course. She loves you."
⩇⩇:⩇⩇✧˖°
Shortly after Miller's departure your dad sent you off to bed, arguing that you were probably tired. And even if you wanted to stay and chat with him for a while, you had to admit he wasn't mistaken. Either way, you still had the rest of the day —and plenty more ahead— to do that. Besides, he still needed to sort some things out before the party.
So, without unpacking or undoing your bed, you slept for hours, dreaming about how your new life was going to be.
(...)
When you finally woke up, night had already fallen. Your dad mustn't have wanted to wake you, but it made you feel in a rush to get ready. You took a cold shower and kept your makeup neutral in order to be quick. Furthermore, Sophie's advice to wear something low-cut was taken under consideration.
Judging by the noise coming from the backyard, you guessed the guests had already started to arrive. You heard talking and music, aside from smelling the hamburgers your dad was preparing. There were kids running around and a couple of people chatting in the living room when you entered, setting all eyes on you.
You knew most of them, neighbors and friends of your dad's. They immediately monopolized your attention, asking questions regarding your career life, reasons why you chose your major and saying how much your dad loved and missed you. It wasn't bad, you liked the courtesy and praise; nonetheless, in the back of your mind you were solely expecting the Millers' arrival.
After a while, you excuse yourself and decide to join your dad outside, stepping onto the fresh air.
"How's everything here?" you ask friendly. "Need any help?"
He was surrounded by some other of his pals, all of whom you'd met in your last visit, except for one– still, you couldn't help but think that he had a familiar air.
"We're alright, honey." You greet them all with a smile as your dad hooks an arm over your shoulders, offering a beer that you decided to decline.
"My niece was right," said the man you didn't know. "You're quite beautiful." He spoke subtly and on the right lines, giving you a affectionate smile. 
"Ah- I don't believe you've met Tommy," your dad chimed in. "He's Joel's younger brother."
"Oh, yeah..." you remembered, "he mentioned you last time I came. It's nice to finally meet you."
Now that you saw him up-close, he did resemble his brother in a certain way. There was something very emblematic that all the Millers had, a sparkle in their eyes that you picked-up on Sarah, but that enchanted you in—
"Speak of the devil..." your head jerked to the side, watching as your most expected guests come to join you.
"My goodness!" you speak in surprise, sharing a hug with Joel's daughter. "You've grown so much in the last two years... You're even taller than me now and I'm wearing heels." The girl giggles, charming as always. "Didn't you just turn seventeen?"
"A month ago," she answers. "But let's not talk about that, it makes dad feel old."
"Joel?" You look behind her, locking glances with him. "But he's in his prime!" he rolls his eyes sardonically.
"Come on, sunshine," Tommy says, "you know it's not polite to make fun of the elderly."
They laugh and you can vaguely hear your dad scolding him, but don't really pay attention to it as they go back to their conversation. In the corner of your eye, you catch a glimpse of his smile.
He looked handsome. To you, he always did. Tonight, however, he decided to change the flannels for an olive button up shirt and a black leather jacket. His curls seemed carefully styled and he smelled of sandalwood.
"By the way," you address Sarah, "I brought you something from New York. It's one of my designs..."
"Seriously?" Her whole face lit up at your words. "You know how much I love your work!"
"Yeah, thought you might like it. But I'll give it tomorrow. I haven't unpacked and my things are real a mess."
"That reminds me." The girl turns to Joel. "Did you bring it?" he nods and takes a small box from the pocket of his jacket, handing it to her.
"What's that?" you question out of curiosity.
"I got you a lil' present," Sarah answered.
"You, did what?" Joel countered with a reproachful tone.
"I mean- I chose a present..." the man clears his throat and she rolls her eyes. "We chose a present, which he payed for. Buuut, it was my idea so-"
His dad snorts and shakes his head, turning to chat with the rest of the men. The younger one drags you away to have some privacy, taking a solitary spot under the big apple tree. During your conversation, you discuss the details of your so called 'highlife' and open the tiny box they gifted, finding a shiny ring sitting on the bottom.
"Do you like it?" You grin and nod in response, deciding to put it on in that same instant. "Dad noticed you like wearing lots of rings.”
Joel noticed.
"I love it," you remark. "Thank you. Both."
Your eyes drift to the crowd gathered around the grill, men laughing and sharing beers. The surprising part was that when you finally found your target, he was already staring at you. If he was expecting you to notice or not, there was no sign. But the older one held your lingering glance and everything else seemed to fade away, suddenly becoming white noise in the background. There was a challenging fire behind his brown orbs, kind of like he was saying 'I know what you're doing and I can do it too'.
"So," you turn back to Sarah with a strange, thrilling sensation in the pit of your stomach, "what's up with you? How's high school?"
"Boring. You know the drill."
"And the boys?" she almost looks flustered at the question.
"Complicated. Bet you know all ‘bout that." Your brows furrow slightly.
"What gave you that idea?"
"Just an impression," her fingers fidget nervously.
You shrug, deciding to change the subject. "You're graduating soon... Have you decided on any universities yet?"
"Not quite," she sighs. "I'm worried about my dad, really. I don't want him to feel alone if I move out."
A sly smile parts your lips. "He won't be. There's my dad, your uncle and... Me. I'll make him a Tinder profile. He'll be fine."
Sarah chuckles and shakes her head. "He talks about you, y'know?"
"What, Joel?" you ask in a sarcastic tone, cocking an eyebrow at her. "Hard to believe."
"It's true! I think he admires you, in a way..."
With a hand gesture, you stop her. "Are we talking about the same man here?"
"Ask him. He might deny it, but it's often your name is brought up in conversations," she unfolds. "When you got that internship in Ralph Lauren, the articles you've written, magazines you've appeared in..."
"It sounds extremely rare for someone like your dad would be interested in the fashion industry. Even if it's just for me, cause I'm certain my own dad is the one forcing all this information onto him."
"Maybe," Sarah agrees. "Whatever it may be, I'm sure he'll be alright if you're around. At least happy, I think."
⩇⩇:⩇⩇✧˖°
The kitchen was a good shelter from all the gossip and noisy kids that turned out to be overwhelming after some time. No one came in there unless they needed to; and as of now they all seemed more concerned with other sorts of business. Besides, it was pretty late and most people had already headed home.
A bottle of wine was opened and poured into a glass, accompanied by a Marlboro cigarette from the depths of your purse, enjoying them while watching the night sky through the window. All your mind could think about was him and his odd behavior: Joel picking up on details, Joel talking about you with Sarah. Him. Just him.
"Am I interrupting somethin'?" you shake your head without looking back, recognizing his voice.
He walks over to you silently. The man is somehow very silent for someone so big, to the point where you didn't even listen when he opened the door. He leans against the counter, his body so close to yours that you can feel his warmth even if you're not seeing him.
"Want some?" you ask, raising your half-empty glass of red liquid and whipping your body to face him, standing shoulder to shoulder, closing the curtain in the meantime.
"Thanks," he mutters, showing his can of beer, “m'not that fancy." You titter, taking a short drag from the dart. "I'll have one of those, if you can spare."
With the fag between your teeth, you take the pack of smokes from your bag and hand it to him, shooting an inquiry expression.
"What?" he asks with an arrogant beam.
"Nothing..." your voice comes out weird from holding back laughter as you take the lighter in your fist. "I just didn't know you smoked."
He takes one to his lips, keeping close eye contact with you all the while. The action sends a rush of excitement throughout your whole body as you duck forward to burn the unlit end, staring back at him with hooded eyes.
"I rarely do," he admits, setting the package aside.
If he wasn't hot enough already, the practiced mannerisms he had when smoking simply added to his sultriness.
"Why you hiding?" you wonder, ashing the cigarette over the sink.
"Not hidin'. Just sent Sarah home, but I wanted to catch you before leavin'."
It didn't surprise you, they lived across the street and, after all, he did say he wanted to talk.
"Did I mention how handsome you look today?" He sneers shortly.
"Well, my daughter was very clear 'bout not wanting me to wear flannels around a fashion designer." Joel takes a sip from his drink, holding the cig between his fingers.
"She gives me too much credit," you say, a bit embarrassed.
"You deserve it," the man replies grimly. "And you look absolutely beautiful, too. One of yours?"
His eyes briefly set on your chest, for such a short second that you actually believed you had probably imagined it. The dress you chose for the occasion was one of your first designs; pearl colored, cinched from the waist above and slightly loose over your thighs.
"Yes," you gulp, diverting your gaze to the glass on your hand. "So how's everything 'round here?" Joel shrugs his shoulders with indifference. 
"'S alright. Same as always," he meditates on it. "Boring without you to keep us entertained."
You utter a mocking snort. "Do my silly little experiences really entertain you?"
The older one tilts his head to blow some smoke. "You always talk so freely about your dreams and the goals you've accomplished. And your dad's enthusiasm is contagious, I might say." He licks his bottom lip, thinking. "I don't know... I'm glad someone close is doing all 'at. Feels like you ain't afraid of anything."
His words put a bright smile on your face. "Life's a risk, isn't it? Better be bold if you want to end up somewhere."
He huffs a laugh, nodding in agreement. A comfortable silence veils between you as you enjoy the alcohol and cigarettes. It was always nice to hang out with him like this.
"By the way, how are you holding up?" the question clasps his curiosity. "Parenting a teenager can be quite difficult, I've heard."
"Jesus," he grunts, "it's driving me insane. Not her per say, but the whole 'boy talk' 's just too much."
"I bet," you chortle, "although, I wouldn't worry too much. It's just a phase." 
"Yeah?" Joel scoffs. "You gon' tell me you ain't got tons of guys chasing around ya' anymore?"
"Oh, they're there," your tone matches his energy. "All these old ladies kept trying to introduce me to their sons a couple hours ago. Nevertheless, I gotta say..." He leaves the empty can on the bar across him. "Boys make me sick."
His eyes widen in surprise, but the rest of his face remained in composure. "How so?"
The atmosphere swiftly changes, a kind of heated tension rising to the top, palpable in your fingertips and waving in his chest.
"I've had my fair share of them," you explain playfully. "Guys my age never know what they want or what they're doing. I've decided to change my focus to men, instead."
He knows what you're up to. You can tell he does.
The question is: will he take the bait?
"Meaning?" Joel's lips curve around the orange filter in a smug smirk. You jerk your head to the right, setting the glass of wine aside.
"I'm not sure..." he laughs dryly at your hesitation.
"I think you are, sweetheart."
The abiding silence that followed that statement was nothing but electrifying. Clouds of burning tobacco linger around as you share an intense gaze, creating a solemn, intriguing ambience.
"Well, how am I supposed to tell you, out of all people, that I'm looking to get attended by an older man?" you rag. "Don't you think it's inappropriate?"
"Mhm," his grin is still visible under the dim, warm lights in the kitchen, "clever girl. I see what you're tryin' to do."
"I don't know what you mean," you murmur, scowling and intending to sound clueless.
He doesn't buy it.
"No-uh. You're many things, darlin', but dumb isn't one." He leans forward, his face barely inches away from yours, eyes scanning your features. Eventually, he decides to keep playing your little game. "Why's that, anyway?"
"See, Joel," you blow some smoke right under his nose, "boys I've been with always take. Everything's gotta be about themselves. I've never been the type to believe in relationships, but if they're gonna suck at that too, the least they could do is make you cum, not leave you drier than a fucking desert." Your words daze his mind and he finds himself pending for something that he wasn't supposed to. "Shit- I'm sorry... I shouldn't talk like this."
"Damn right you shouldn't," he rasps out, "what would your dad think if he heard you?"
Joel Miller never considered himself a weak man. Not once in his life. It's not who he is.
But right now, under your curious, passionate gape, he's slowly crumbling.
"Good thing you aren't my dad, then."
His heart is pounding in expectation and confusion. He keeps thinking 'this can't be happening'. He tries to convince himself that it's all in his mind, like he did last time you were in Austin. But you bat your pretty eyelashes at him an it feels like you're begging to be taken away.
"Sweetheart, I don't think you know what you're asking for," he talks strictly, like you wouldn't actually understand. "Say this things to the wrong person and they might take advantage of you."
You laugh under your breath. "Are you the wrong person?"
He remains silent for a couple seconds, contemplating your question, meditating this whole parade in order to keep his head cold and ignoring the increasing heat that soared all around.
"M'not sure," he huffs.
It's true. He doesn't know anymore.
Your cig has burned out.
"I think you are, Mr. Miller."
Oh, such a clever girl indeed.
Suspense is killing him, like he's walking on the edge of a blade. Your closeness is intoxicating, the smell of your perfume gets him dizzy and his skin burned there where your limbs brushed against each other's. His lungs felt like crushing under the weight of anticipation.
"Quit beating around the bush," he downright demands. "Tell me what you want."
Honesty is a virtue; one you didn't lack with him.
"You," his chest puffs with a shaky breath. "Ever since we first met, you've been the only man on my mind."
Dangerous. This whole situation is dangerous.
But Joel would be lying if he said he didn't feel the same. That was the worst part of it.
For little more than a decade he had been perfectly content with his singleness; the sole thought of going on a date being absolutely terrifying. His best friend did try to set him up with a couple of his female acquaintances multiple times; yet he declined or merely accepted out of sympathy, never taking things further than a one night stand. Joel never expected that the one woman that would grasp his attention would be you.
He had never been into younger girls, at least not that young. But there was something enchanting about you. Whether it was your charming smile, your cunning eyes or your confident, determined nature that made all heads turn in your direction when you walked into a place.
Something about you bewitched him.
Perhaps it was none of that and he was simply depraved. Perhaps it was all of that and more.
For all he knew, you could've put a spell on him. Since your last visit, you had been on his mind like a mist that fogged his senses. He felt torn apart by his morals and desires, trying his best to get rid of the ghost of you.
That was until your dad told him you were coming back to stay for an undefined amount of time. What kind of sick game was fate playing with him?
"You tryin' to get me killed?" he locks a snarl behind his teeth.
His cigarette has burned out too.
"I know I'm asking for much," you say, "that I put you in a difficult position. With my dad and all 'at." Swallowing hard, you muster enough courage to raise a hand to his jacket, just laying your palm flat there. He allows it. "So I understand if you say no. You can decline and we’ll just act like nothing happened."
If Joel were a better man, he would've.
He definitely should have.
"It's okay. I can always call the next older lad on my hotline," you joke. "Your brother Tommy... I think he'll be interested."
He'd be damned.
No. Joel was just a man, and like every other, he could only take so much.
Quicker than you'd expect, his hand catches your wrist and moves your arm away from his body, the other raising your head up with two fingers under your chin. His face is so close to yours that his breath tickles your skin.
"Is that so?" his voice drops an octave. "You disappoint me, sweetheart."
Your legs quiver, feeling suddenly weak on the knees and hot on your lower abdomen. "How?"
His thumb sweeps over your bottom lip, staring down at you as if he had you wrapped around his finger. Truth be told, he really did.
"Thought there was a bit more fight in ya'," he whispers, letting go of your hand and laying his palm flat on your hip. "I haven't yet given my answer and you're already thinking of fucking my brother?"
You lick your lips nervously, glancing at his own and then back at his eyes. Your breathing pattern is completely altered and the ache between your legs starts to grow.
"Or was that just to tease me?" he asks with a grin.
"I don't know..." your hands clench in fists, wanting to touch him but wallowing in this new power dynamic. "Maybe."
"That's rather vague, darling." He takes a step forward, eradicating the distance that separated your bodies. "I'll ask again..." his fingers curl around your throat, not applying pressure but merely holding you in place. "What do you want?"
It's too late to look back now. Though you wouldn't think of it. "I want you to fuck me, Joel."
Music to his ears.
He doesn't respond, eyes boring into yours intently. The unholy words that you spoke scatter his brain and all he wants to do is accept. But he wouldn't indulge so easily. If you wanted to play games, he'd teach you how to play better.
You tilt your head upwards, searching for his mouth with limited mobility. Your eyes briefly close at the feeling of your lips barely brushing against his own, waiting for him to kiss you. Except he does not, simply caressing the soft flesh teasingly.
Joel's body is flushed against yours, keeping you caged between the counter and him. The hand that rested on your hip gradually travels to your ass, splaying his fingers over your covered butt and giving a firm squeeze that makes you squeal. Every breath he takes is the very air you breathe. The proximity and his scent are slowly —but surely— making you lose your sanity.
"Such a pretty girl," he mutters hoarsely, "with such filthy thoughts." You look at him through heavy lids, gaining enough courage to move your hands to his broad chest. "What am I gonna do with you?"
"Please, just- kiss me." The plea is so desperate and pathetic that it doesn't even sound like you.
"Can't do," he says at last. "If you want to be treated like a slut, you'll get treated like one. Sluts don't get kissed." You feel yourself get wet with his attitude, trying to clench your thighs together in order to create some friction. "I can't give you what you want, sweetheart. Not tonight, at least."
His lips move to your jawline, tracing open-mouthed kisses along your bare neck and collarbones that have you panting in seconds, his facial hair scratching your skin deliciously before coming back up again.
"But don't worry, angel," he pours into the shell of your ear, "I'll make sure you cum, since you want it so bad."
"Fuck, Joel-" you stutter when he abruptly spins your body around, his growing bulge grinding against your lower back.
His face nuzzles on the crook of your neck as his hand roams over your thigh, leisurely making its way beneath your dress. You feel his teeth lightly scraping your flesh, the hardness of his crotch poking your ass and your own arousal pooling in your panties.
"Jesus..." he groans when his fingers reach the dampness between your legs. "I've barely touched you and you're already soaked."
"I meant it when-" your sentence gets muffled by a strangled moan that escapes your lips, "when I said I've been wanting you for so long."
His body vibrates with a laugh, ruffling your hair with his breath. He starts rubbing small circles on your clit, making your whole body shiver and squirm while he pushes the fabric aside, gathering your slick with his index and spreading it all the way back to your bud, repeating his actions until your arousal covered his knuckles.
"Wanna know a lil' secret?" his voice comes out soothing and husky as he eases two digits inside you, stretching you out in a way that makes both of you groan. "I felt the same."
His fingers are thicker, bigger and rougher than yours, adding to a new, unlocked satisfaction you had not yet experienced.
Joel took his time to explore the spots that provided more pleasure, that had your hips chasing him and biting your lip to refrain from making noise. His other hand gropes your breast, caressing your delicate nipple over the thin fabric, easily done due to the lack of a bra. He keeps altering his ministrations, collecting the wetness from your core and bringing it up to your bundle of nerves, prior to sliding into your cunt again. All that can be heard in the kitchen are the squelching, utterly pornographic sounds of your pussy and your pitiful whines, inaudible to everyone but him.
"You like this, sweetheart?" he hums, feeling your sticky arousal drip down your thighs, rejoicing in your responsiveness to him. "Being fingered by a man twice your age while your dad's just a few steps away?"
You squeeze his thick fingers, picturing just how big his cock must be just from the boner pressing your back. "Y-yes..."
He simply loves the way he's got you so needy, coming undone with so little. You were easy to please, so he wondered how awful your past lovers must've been if they couldn't get you wet. A primal instinct surges on Joel, wanting to erase all of them from your mind, as he wanted to be the only man you ever think about if you're having an orgasm.
"That's my girl," he coos, thrusting his fingers at a nice pace, curling them upwards to hit that soft spot that made your knees tremble.
You hold onto the counter for dear life, throwing your head back and laying it on his chest. He sighs every time your cunt tightens around his digits, mesmerized by your enticing cries and whimpers that had him painfully hard in his jeans. The sensation is overwhelming, adrenaline filling both of you at the prospect of getting caught.
A burning sensation builds on your lower belly, tiny beads of sweat rolling down your temple at the incoming crescendo. His thumb kneads over your clit with the right amount of pressure and your body gives in to him, all tension melting away as your muscles relax.
"Just like that, darling." His deep voice reverberates through you, holding you up by the grip on your waist. "Take what I give you."
"Joel, Joel, Joel-" he chuckles once again at your delirious state, biting down the sensitive skin on your neck as he helps you carry out your high.
He pulls his fingers out and you mewl in complaint, mouth slightly agape. You can't see his face but you watch as he takes both his sticky fingers to his mouth, your chest rising and falling while trying to regain composure. He licks them clean, savoring your sweet taste and feeling his cock twitch from the mere idea of his tongue exploring your folds, taking that same flavor straight from the source.
"I'm not done with you," he growls, swirling your body around.
He's fucked up now. He has found his own, favorite drug between your thighs and can’t seem to stop himself from getting it. He had a small taste and now craved for more like he was a famished man.
"Can I get a kiss now?" Joel finds your insistence amusing.
Those eyes of yours were driving him insane, staring at him wildly, sparkling with an etching desire. Your lips were plumped and glossy, cheeks flushed red and hands fisting his shirt. Seeing this side of you was like displaying one of his darkest fantasies, the kind that would randomly appear in his dreams and had him waking up guilty and needy.
"No," he grumbles, cupping your face in his hand and forcing you to glance up at him. "Open up."
You obligue without hesitation, parting your lips shamelessly— which further spurs him on—. Almost instinctively, you already know what he's going to do, catching that inquiring look in his darkened eyes. With a light tap to his chest, you give him the green light and he spits right into your mouth. You don't think about it twice; in fact, you can't even process what you're actually doing, unconsciously swallowing down while keeping eye contact.
"Good girl," he purrs, caressing the side of your face with gentle stokes of his thumb.
His voice and praise send you to oblivion, managing to give you goosebumps. But Joel won't allow you to catch a break, glueing his lips to the hollow of your throat and making his way down, down, down, until he's kneeling before you, feeling the way you tense and shake for him. He grips your body strongly, the pads of his thumbs dipping on your hipbones as he rests his forehead on your lower abdomen, taking a deep breath in. Your hands run through his curls, tenderly grazing his scalp with your nails. 
The man feels as if he's wasted; your scent, all around him, on him, intoxicating every fiber on his body. He'd be haunted by it, by you, in the upcoming days.
He reaches beneath the hem of your dress, fingers skating along the band of your panties and tugging them down at a tortuous pace, meanwhile his eyes pierce your soul. Joel lets the drenched underwear pool at your ankles and drags the thin, satiny fabric all the way up to your tummy, inhaling sharply at the sight of your sticky slick covering your inner thighs.
"Fuck..." he touches you like you're sacred, like he was granted permission to do so but couldn't fully believe it. "Jesus Christ, you're beautiful," he mumbles when he coaxes your legs apart.
You blush at the comment, growing partially embarrassed. A shadow of pure lust covers his gaze as he stares at your exposed, wet cunt. He basks in the view of your damp skin and swollen clit, feeling his mouth water and his pants strain.
"Joel-"
"Forgive me, darlin'. Been a while since I..." he clears his throat, trying to regain hold of himself, "since I went down on a woman."
Your fingers tangle on his locks and you give him a reassuring smile. "You don't have to-"
"But I want to," Joel blurts out. "I need to taste you, sweetheart. Would you allow me to?"
Did he even need to ask?
"Yes- god. Please..."
It's all he had to hear. He leaves small kisses on your swollen lips, taking pleasure in your silent gasps as his mouth inched closer to your clit. Your hips buck against his face when his tongue finally landed on that sensitive bundle of nerves, making you moan a bit louder.
"Fucking hell," you babble, gripping his hair tighter.
He groans, his tongue flattening above your delicate bud and sucking on it. Joel can see in your face how hard you're trying to refrain from making any noise, your brows slightly furrowed and mouth partially open as you throw your head back. His chest swells with pride, knowing he's the one making you feel this good.
Then you have to hold yourself up when he suddenly hooks one hand around your calf and lifts your leg, placing it over his shoulder to keep you open for him. His face buries between your thighs, tongue sliding across your wet folds and savoring your arousal mixed with your previous release. He uninhibitedly whimpers, lapping up the slick that kept pouring out of you, devouring your pussy like he had never had anything as good.
The man can't take it anymore, he's reached his limit. One of his hands snake down to fumble at his belt, as he sloppily palms his bulge through the briefs, trying to get some relief. He's drunk, feral, when he eats you out most earnestly, finding your weak spots rather quickly— the ones that made you shiver, that made you shut your eyes from sheer pleasure or grind against his face, but specially the ones that had you tugging harshly at his hair.
"Joel- please, I'm so close..." you cry out lowly, the only thing that kept you standing being his hand on your waist.
His beard makes your skin feel feverish and it's nearly impossible for you to hold back a whine when his nose grazes your clit and right in that instant you're coming hard, nerves buzzing and ears ringing. You feel lightheaded, white spots appearing in front of your eyes as the orgasm rips through you intensely. He drinks you down, licking you clean as if it was a crime not to, and you gasp at the overstimulation.
He helps you steady yourself as he gets back on his feet, hovering above you. His lips were shining with saliva and your own juices, dripping down to his chin. You breathe rapidly, pulse still racing while you look up at him with glassy eyes.
It's right in this moment when Joel knows for certain that he'd do it all again, consequences be damned.
If he was going to hell for what he'd done, then he would gladly do it, knowing that he had seen heaven the moment his tongue was inside you.
"Did I live up to your expectations, sweetheart?"
Instead of replying, your hand shoots to his jaw, the pad of your thumb brushing over his bottom lip. He lets out a shaky exhale and you don't miss the opportunity to finally lean in for a kiss. And despite his previous declines to your wish, Joel happily corresponded. You taste him and yourself when his mouth explores yours in depth, feeling his unsteady heartbeat against your own chest.
It's madness; a blur of wet, messy kisses as your hand coasts down his pants and underneath his briefs. You swallow down his lewd moans when you grasp his throbbing length, a deep groan coming from his throat when you circle the tip with one finger, coating it with his leaking precome. He takes your wrist to prevent you from going any further.
"Enough of that," he grunts, still not pushing your hand away. "I'm too worked up, I don't wanna be coming in my pants like a goddamned teenager."
You respect his decision, drawing your hand back and guiding your fingers to your lips with a cheeky smile. Fucking tease.
"I think it'd be hot," you murmur, dragging the words and leaning next to his ear. "Maybe afterwards I can help you clean up the mess..." you carefully nip at his earlobe, delighting in the way his body jumped and a sigh escaped him. "With my mou-"
"Fuuuck..." the mental image you were describing was not helping his situation. "We- we’ll do that next time.”
And before you can move a muscle, he gives you a soft forehead kiss and rearranges his pants, asking you to say goodbye to your dad in his behalf as he sneaked out. You stand there for a couple of minutes, dumbfounded and completely blown away from your post-orgasm bliss, still processing that all this had actually happened and it was not just another of your sexual fantasies and daydreams.
Joel was in a similar position. In spite of taking a cold shower and fucking his fist in the meantime, tonight's events kept being relived every time he closed his eyes, making him yearn for you all over again. It was a tough night of not much sleeping.
He thinks he might feel guilty in the morning.
Maybe he should. But he honestly doesn't.
Not even when he faces your dad the next day and he tells him how happy he is to have his darling daughter back home.
Nor do you. There's not a hint of guilt in your body when you go to his house in the next few days, solely to spend time with Sarah. No shame in the looks you share, regardless of the little to zero time you could spend together, always being surrounded by other people.
None of that mattered. All the while, the only question that roams your minds is: when will you do it again?
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harrysfolklore · 9 months
Text
new year's wish - blurb
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a/n: happy happy new year loves ! wrote this little blurb about one of my favorite tropes and i hope you like it, let me know your thoughts <3
gif by @harryisart
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
2011
It was a tradition between your friend group at this point.
For the last two years, you've been celebrating New Year's Eve at Jonny's place, all of you getting together to celebrate and reminisce about your memories together.
You loved your friends to pieces, your group wasn't exactly huge, but you've made a bond so special over the years that no one could easily break.
However, you surely had a different and deeper connection with your best friend, Harry.
You met Harry the first day of middle school, and ever since your first interaction you've been inseparable. As time passed and you got closer to Harry, you began noticing some changes in how you felt. His laughter made you feel happier, his support meant a lot more, and being around him felt different—like something special. Sometimes, you found yourself admiring him in a way that went beyond just being friends. You started to realize that your feelings for Harry were growing into something deeper than friendship, something you hadn't felt before. It was like a secret you kept in your heart, waiting for the right time to figure out what it meant and terrified that making a move would ruin your friendship.
"Hey! I was looking for you." Harry's voice interrupted your train of thought, making you move from the fireplace you've been standing for the last few minutes.
"I got cold outside, wanted to catch some warmth." you said, looking at your curly haired best friend.
"The countdown is about to begin," he let you know, "Let's go with the rest."
You followed him to where your friends were hanging out, sitting next to him.
"What's on your mind? You're really quiet."
You took a moment before replying, "Just thinking about how everything's going to be different next year, we're barely going to see you."
"What do you mean?" Harry asked, a frown appearing on his face.
"You know, the band is taking off and you're going to be so busy," a confused look took over his face, "Don't get me wrong, I'm so proud of you, we all are. I'm just going to miss all of us here together, at Jonny's place."
"Come on, none of that," he said as he noticed a pout making its way to your face, throwing his arm around your shoulders and pulling you to his side, "I'm always going to be around, you won't get rid of me that easily," you laughed at this, "Next year we're all going to be right here together and nothing's going to change."
And as the clock counted down the seconds till midnight you wished for one thing: I wish he doesn't forget about me
2013
"Hey, stranger."
"Hello to you too, miss"
Harry's voice echoed through the speakers of your car, making you laugh as you drove the streets of Holmes Chapel, heading to your favorite wine shop.
"Are you coming to Jonny's place for New Years or are you going to spend it with your famous friends." You joked, and even though you couldn't see him you knew he was rolling his eyes.
"Of course I am, that's every year," you smiled at his words, "Besides, I need to see you so I can tell you all about this girl I'm seeing," and just like that your smile quickly faded, and you were glad he couldn't see you because you could swear your face dropped along with your heart, "I'm super thrilled, we hit it off right away and I honestly can't wait for you to meet her."
You weren't sure how many seconds passed in silence from you,but soon enough you heard Harry's voice asking if you were still on the line.
"Yeah, just got distracted by the traffic," you lied, "I can't wait to hear all about it, I'm glad you're happy."
New Year's was days away but you already had your wish in mind: I wish to be the girl for him someday
2015
There was just one thing in your mind as you sat on the bar stool with a drink in your hand: this year sucked.
That year, Harry had a super busy time with lots of success. He kept in touch, but it wasn't like before, your talks became shorter, and you didn't hang out much. You understood he was busy, but it felt different, you missed him and the fact he didn't show up for New Year's hit hard
On top of that, the headline "Spotted: Kendall Jenner and Harry Styles Getting Handsy on a Yacht" was the first thing you read in the morning, and it hurt.
You weren't even celebrating at Jonny's place, which made the night even more depressing for you, your friends insisted on trying something different and celebrate at a rooftop bar instead.
Maybe you held on to nostalgia too much, but you missed the old days when everything was simpler and you had Harry next to you.
"Hey! Countdown is about to begin, what are you doing on your own?" Ellis, one of your closest friends, called for you making you hop off the stool and join them.
"Everyone has their wishes for the new year?" Jonny asked the group, and you knew exactly what was the only thing you were going to wish for: I wish things would to go back to how they were
2019
"Look who finally showed up!"
Jonny's voice made everyone turn their heads towards the door, where a cuddly looking Harry stood with a bottle of wine.
"Hello to you too, mate." Harry said, making his way toward his best friend and giving him a hug.
After letting go of Jonny, he locked eyes with you and wasted no time to pull you close and wrap you around his arms.
"I missed you," he mumbled against the crown of you head, where he placed a small kiss, "I'm sorry I haven't texted, you know how chaotic album releases are."
You smiled with a tingle of sadness, Harry had just released his second album 'Fine Line', one that he described as having sex and feeling sad and that mainly talked about his most recent breakup.
A breakup that you helped him get through even though your own heart was being obliquely broken by him once again. But at the end at the day, he was still your best friend and there was nothing in this world you wouldn't do for him.
"It's okay, you're here now." You let go of him and squeezed his arm one final time before joining the rest of your friends in cheerful conversation.
Like every year, the night flew by and before you knew it you were a few minutes away from midnight, so you took that as a cue to look for Harry who had been absent from the room due to his phone ringing.
"H? Are you done with your phone call?" you asked, getting close to him, "Is everything okay?"
"It was Camille," he said, turning to look at you and showing you a small smile, one that gave away his contentment about it, "She said she wants to talk in person, to work things out."
"Oh that's, that's good I guess." You tried your best to give him a fake smile.
"It's more than good, this is great!" his smile widened as he moved from his place and wrapped an arm around your shoulders to give you to where your friends were calling for both of you, "Never thought this year would end like this."
His words echoed in your head as you stood with your friends who counted down the seconds until midnight, and a single wish came to your mind: I wish loving him didn't hurt so much
2023
The familiar setting at Jonny's place made you feel comfortable and at ease, no matter how busy your lives had been that year, your friends would always show up to celebrate the new year together and that was something you deeply cherished
This year had been extra special, with every aspect of your life blossoming, but there was a certain thing that made 2023 a great year: your relationship with Harry.
You two had become even closer that you were before, you had always been best friends who shared everything but things felt different now.
Maybe it was the way you exchanged looks that lasted a bit too long, the accidental touches that sent shivers down your spine, or the things you both didn't say but felt.
You couldn't shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, Harry finally felt something more too. But your intrusive thoughts, the fear of ruining your friendship and the amount of times you've been heartbroken over the years kept pushing these thoughts away every time they popped up.
"Praying to the God's above that Harry finally kisses you at midnight?" Ellis' voice almost made you jump on your spot on the couch, she plopped next to you with a beer on her hand and a cocky smile.
"Ellis! What are you on about!" you complained, making her roll her eyes.
"Come on! We all know that's what you wish for every birthday, and we've noticed that he can’t keep his hands off you tonight, walking in hand in hand and all."
It was your turn to roll your eyes, but you could feel your stomach twist at her words.
After a few more drinks and not so subtle teasing from your friends about you and Harry, you slipped away for a bit, needing a break from the noise. Soon enough Harry spotted you by the window, looking up at the stars.
"Hey," Harry said standing next to you, you smiled as you felt his arm wrap around your waist, "The countdown is about to begin."
"Let's go join them then." You moved from the window and tried to head towards the living room, but Harry's hand grabbing yours made you stop on your tracks.
"Actually," he avoided your eyes, focusing on the scenery outside for a moment, "I've been wanting to talk to you about something, I don't even know if this is the ideal time but-"
"Hey," you cut him off, finding his eyes and giving him a tender smile, "It's okay, you know you can tell me anything."
"I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, about this year and everything that changed, especially between us," he began, his voice soft yet determined, and your face full of confusion and anticipation.
"These past years have been a whirlwind," Harry continued, "But in all the chaos and changes, there's been one constant, You. And I've been blind to not recognize what that means."
Your breath caught in your throat and you could swear you felt your palms drench in sweat.
"I've wasted too much time not acknowledging it, not admitting it to myself and hurting you in the process," Harry spoke again, his voice laced with a tingle of sadness. "I cherish our friendship deeply, but I've come to understand that what I feel for you goes beyond just friendship. It's something deeper, something I've been too oblivious to see clearly for my own selfish reasons."
His words hung in the air, you could hardly believe what you were hearing, the words you'd secretly longed for so many years, spoken by the person who meant the world to you.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you, I've loved you for longer than I realized, and I don't want another year passing without telling you."
Tears welled up in your eyes and without a word, you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. It felt like the weight of the years of unspoken emotions was finally lifted, and in that moment, everything felt right.
"I love you too," you whispered, your voice filled with a all kinds of emotions. "I've always loved you, Harry."
From afar, you could hear the cheers and celebrations of a New Year, the clock had reached midnight and your friends already made their wishes.
And as you finally kissed the man you loved after he confessed that he loved you too, there was nothing else you'd rather wish for.
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oh-koenig-my-koenig · 9 months
Text
after the concert
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | (cw: age gap 25/41, nsfw, pure smutty smut, mdni)
König carries me the whole way to my apartment, his hands gripping my ass and thigh, subconsciously kneading them, while my head snuggles in the crook of his neck, my mouth coasting over the soft skin. The fingers of my right hand are tangled in his hair, resting at the back of his head scratching ever so slightly, while the other one strokes down his stomach, the keys in it jingling with every movement.
His fingertips dig deeper into the swell of my booty. "Stop it, you're killing my restraint.", he grunts and I just giggle.
We're already at my apartment door and honestly, I'm just glad we didn't run into any neighbors. He takes the keys from my hands and unlocks it, carrying me inside. Unfortunately, he does not yet know about my cat.
"Uah, what the fuck is this?!", he curses, as the kitty rubs against his legs, so he almost stumbles over her. I can't hold back a laugh while he carefully tries to not step on the cat's tail.
I slide out of his hold onto the floor and pick Mimi up. The small little black furball purrs against my face, butting heads with me as she tries to get her daily dose of cuddles in.
"You wanna hold her for a bit?", I ask, not waiting for an answer, just shoving her against his chest and his big hands grab the tiny kitty. I giggle to myself, taking off my shoes and heading to the kitchenette to get something to drink because I'm parched from the concert. And very sweaty and sticky from all the dancing and moshing.
When I return, I see that the little minx already has him wrapped around her little paw. He doesn't even look at me, totally enraptured by the little creature. She's currently snuggling into the crook of his neck, purring against the tall man.
Cockblocked – or rather pussyblocked – by my own cat. But I know how to change that.
"So, uh, you wanna take a shower?", I ask, with a wry grin. I've never seen anybody set down a cat quicker, König bending down quite a bit, not to just drop her onto the floor. When he straightens back up, his gaze is on me, burning into me, stripping me down with his eyes.
"I would like that.", he says, his voice a bit deeper than it was before.
My mouth falls open a bit at his lustful stare because it just got harder to breathe, and I just head to the bathroom to my right.
I unceremoniously pull my shirt over my head and drop my skirt to the floor before I pull off my bra and tights. I don't think about it too much, but at the same time I feel how he's staring at me, his gaze burning into me. Turning around I catch him, the mouth agape. The way his eyes skim over my body like a light touch, dwelling longer on certain spots. Dropping from my collarbone to my tits, further down to my stomach and my still clothed booty. He stalks closer and I take a little step back, so I still can look up at him without straining my neck.
He gets rid of his t-shirt as well, and my mouth goes dry. The tattoos from his arms span over his strong shoulders, huge pecs, one side adorned with a little ring in his nipple, the broad chest... he is obviously in very good shape which isn't surprising given his occupation.
But he also has a little pudge sitting at his waist and a bit of tummy. My god.
I have to will my fingers to stay at my side because all I wanna do is touch everything, run my hands over his torso, squeeze, cuddle – lick.
His long hair falls down over his shoulders, some strands coming down over his face, softly flowing over the muscles, the pecs, when he moves.
Dark hair peppers his chest and my eyes follow the happy trail down into his jeans, so clearly tented by his erection. A slight smirk plays on his lips while he pulls the zipper down and takes off his pants, not wearing anything underneath, so his dick springs free, hanging heavy in front of him, as the denim falls onto the floor. A sparkle of jewelry catches my eye, and I realize he has a piercing on his tip. I feel red hot blush color my cheeks while I take off my panties, like this is all just normal and chill. And I’m totally normal and chill.
And I try not to fucking stare. I mean I already felt it pressing against me. And I know how big he is. So, of course, his dick is huge as well. But my god, I don't think he will fit.
Before I can spend any more of my thoughts on his size, I hop into the shower that's usually very spacious. For me at least. When König joins, it gets crowded. But I don't care.
Our bodies press together, when I reach for the knob, turning on the shower, and the warm spray rains down on us. His arms wrap around my waist, and I can feel his dick pressing into my belly, softly rutting into the soft pillow, doing so almost subconsciously, while he leans down to kiss me.
"Damn, I planned on eating you out in here.", he whispers against my lips. "But I don't think I can even kneel down."
"I'm sorry, the other shower guests were never as big as you are.", I joke lightly, ignoring how him talking about eating me out made me feel, but when I see the expression on his face, I regret bringing up former partners. I mean, I don't want to think about his former partners right now either. But it's true nonetheless, in every kind of sense.
"Hm, seems like I need to kidnap you into my shower sometime...", he mutters, his hands roaming my body, fingers digging into me.
I can't suppress the little shiver rolling down my spine. He feels it and acknowledges it with a little "We don't need to do anything, okay?", still making sure I am okay with all of this.
I get on my tiptoes, holding onto his shoulders, pressing my body up against his. "But I want to.", I whisper before my lips crash into his.
Our touches get heated, care thrown out the window, desperate kisses and tangled limbs. He spins me around, his hands grabbing me, stroking down my sides, until they land on my hips, tilting them back ever so slightly. He grinds against me and I answer his testing advances, moving with him.
My palms are placed flush against the shower tiles, his front against my back. His lap presses against the swell of my ass, the tip of his dick slipping in between my thighs. I press them together around him as he pulls back a bit, then snaps his hips forward again.
His hands cover mine as he starts to slowly fuck my thighs, his dick stroking over my puffy folds, the hard length pressing against my clit, the head nudging against it with every pass.
Fuck. If that's just a little taste of how he plans to fuck me...
"Oh, you're so fucking tiny, Kleine, you're gonna be so fucking tight around me.", he growls against my temple, the words dousing me in hot arousal.
"I don't know if you're gonna fit.", I whisper, moving my ass back into him again, panting.
He hums, a light confident sound. "I'm gonna make it fit, don't worry." His lips find the sensitive spot on my neck while his hips roll against me, and I can feel the wetness between my legs that has nothing to do with the water flowing over us.
I'm getting all worked up, and he is as well, but he stops, pulling back, his harsh breath hitting the shell of my ear. "Come on, need to get you into bed.”, he says with a hint of mischief in his voice that makes me giggle.
I wait for him to leave the shower and step out, getting two fresh towels for us.
We're drying ourselves off quickly, our horniness making us hurry along, and when our gazes meet, we can't help but laugh. I hang up my towel and his as well, hurrying out the bathroom in the direction of the bedroom. He follows me with long strides, actually catching up to me and giving my booty a little spank. I squeal and jump onto the bed, crawling onto the soft sheets, turning around to look at him. He sits down next to me, the mattress dipping down under his weight, and before he can say anything, I pipe up: "I'm not on the pill, and I uh- didn't know your size.", feeling a little shy all of a sudden.
"Don't worry." he pulls me into him for a moment and puts a little kiss to the top of my head, like he actually wants to kiss the worries away, before he goes to grab his wallet from his jeans, pulling a condom out of it. "I brought some, even if I felt presumptuous at the time of putting them in there." A little grin plays round the corners of his mouth.
He puts the foil square right next to the bottle of lube I moved from inside the drawer of the bedside table to the top of it. Setting it aside for later.
König smirks at me, the little grin getting wider, as I look up at him, kind of waiting what he’s gonna do. He grips my ankle, pulling me to the edge of the mattress again, which makes me yelp and giggle, relaxing into the sheets after he positioned me how he wants me.
He kneels down in front of the bed, still being at eyelevel with me, and kisses me. His hands grab my waist, his fingers trailing down, kneading the flesh of my hips, digging into the swell of my ass. I hold onto him, feeling his strong shoulders and the soft hair underneath my fingertips, stroking gently, while I answer his kiss. My tongue against his, tasting me.
His mouth wanders from mine over my cheek, down to my neck. Hot, open-mouthed kisses, that make me pant. Moving onto the collarbone, kissing and sucking, until I'm sure he left a hickey. Kissing further down, which has me arching me back, so my tits pop out and his tongue licks over my nipple, a loud moan leaves my throat, spurring him on, his mouth closing around the pebbled tip.
The licking and soft sucking almost distracts me from his fingers dropping down between my legs. The fingertips stroke over my pussy, wet and needy, and we groan in unison as he dips into me for the first time. I clench around his finger, my hips moving of their own volition, searching for more friction, fucking myself onto his hand. Desperate for more.
He softly bites my nipple, the stinging sensation pulling another hoarse moan from my lips, while he adds another finger. My hands tangle in his hair, pulling him into me, while he caresses the other boob, his digits moving inside me. He moves down, kissing down, and I slowly fall back onto the bed. Kisses on my tummy, my hips, the soft mound over my pussy. He pulls his fingers out of me and pushes my legs back, still hovering over me. His gaze wanders from my sex to my face, our eyes meeting, and I almost feel like he’s waiting. I’m desperate, needy, his touches left me panting, and a little “please” from me is all it takes.
My knees are up against my chest, as he dives into my pussy, licking and sucking, hungrily lapping up the wetness. An “Oh fuck” drops from my lips, little mewls and moans following, and I squirm against his face.
I feel the light scratches from his stubble, the sensation of it against my sensitive skin sending shivers over my body, my hips violently jerking against his mouth. He licks up and down, nibbling, sucking, his hand spreading me for him, and I don’t think I’ve had anybody ever shamelessly eat me out like that. I can’t help it, but my fingers tangle in his hair again, the soft locks that I felt underneath my fingertips when I was sitting on his shoulders at the concert, now that his head is between my legs again for so vastly different reasons.
He doesn’t complain, humming ever so slightly, a satisfied little noise, when I pull at his roots, wanting more, wanting him even closer.
His hand wanders up my body until it reaches my chin, clasping around my neck. The breath halts in my throat, as his fingers squeeze lightly and his tongue dips into me. His thumb moves over my lips, pushing between my teeth. I lick and suck instinctively, like I would another part of him. He growls lightly at how I’m sucking his digit off, a sound that vibrates against my wetness, and I almost cum.
His mouth latches onto my clit, sucking hard, and with a loud moan my orgasm crashes over me. His fingers push into me again, the added sensation prolonging the waves of arousal washing over me. My thighs push together in an effort to make his teasing touches stop, but he doesn’t until it subsides, and I slump down.
He gets up from the floor and climbs onto the bed, positioning me in front of him, my legs spread over his thighs. I feel exposed, lying before him like that, my pussy on full display. He reaches for the condom and the lube, opening the foil packet with his teeth and rolling the rubber down on his length, the latex stretching to his size easily. I watch him, his dick resting against my stomach as he puts some lube on his hand. It still seems very big, to be honest. He sees the little skeptic expression on my face, and a cocky smirk stalks on his lips, while he spreads the lube on the condom and positions himself at my entrance.
“If it hurts, just tell me, okay?”, he says, the deep voice soft. “I don’t want you to hurt.”
I nod. “Yes.”, anticipating the feeling that floods me as soon as his dick presses into me.
Pushing into me, stretching me, while his thumb softly rubs my clit.
Rutting back and forth slowly, until the combined wetness from the lube and my pussy is coating his whole length.
He buries himself deep inside me, until he bottoms me out. I clench around his length, which makes his eyes roll back, a low grunt falling from his lips. A little choked sound escapes me. Feeling so full, I think I might burst.
Well, he said, he would make it fit.
He bends forward, fitting right between my thighs, placing a little kiss on my lips. He pulls back a bit, his gaze intently on my face, as he starts to fuck me, low and slow.
His long hair falls down like a cascade, the tips grazing over my neck and boobs, as he fucks me slowly, still letting me adjust to his length. My back arches and my lids get heavy from the intense pleasure of the deep pushes into me.
"Look at me, look at me." He grabs my cheeks with his hand. I will my eyes to stay open, focused on his face, our gazes interlocked, when he moves his hips oh so sweetly. It’s different from how I imagined it would be.
I can feel how he’s holding back. And I can see the hunger in his eyes as he straightens back up, his gaze moving down my body, taking in my titties that bounce slightly and the spot where we are connected.
But I also can feel his restraint slipping with every push of his dick into my wetness.
“Can I fuck you harder? Please.”, he begs, his voice dropping, his hands grabbing me again.
I reach out until my fingertips touch his hips, stroking over the soft skin. "Do it. I already told you, I don't break that easily.", I answer, whispering. And that’s all the encouragement he needs.
He starts to fuck me – really fuck me – rolling his hips into my lap. He pulls my legs back and up, so they rest against his shoulders. And who would have known? They really are very good legrests. I mean, my legs aren’t really resting on them, my feet dangling up over them, the size difference really obvious right now. But I don’t have any time to dwell on that thought, with the way he’s fucking me right now.
It’s even more intense like that, with my legs up in the air like that, and I can really feel his whole length inside me, reaching so fucking deep. Incoherent curses and a lot of “yes” is all I’m able to articulate.
His dick pistoning in and out of me, his large hands gripping my thighs, pulling me into him at his rhythm. The swell of my ass colliding with his thighs, the sound of skin slapping against skin, our intermingled moans and sighs.
This is much more how I thought it would be. Him throwing me around like he wants to, me getting my brains fucked out, taking everything he’s giving me.
My back arches of his own volition, my hands trying to hold onto to something, tangling in the sheets beneath me. He pushes into me hard and deep, and my thighs start to shake.
"Yes, fuck, come for me, Liebes.", he grunts, the words almost an order. One I cannot refuse. I cum on his dick, and he just keeps on fucking me, dragging it out, stroking over my clit with his thumb.
He doesn't even let my orgasm fully pass before he drops my legs and flips me onto my front. Pulling up my hips a bit, he fucks into me. My hands fist the sheets, holding onto them, not to get shoved forward, my face is pressed into the pillow, my moans getting swallowed up by it.
The sounds of his grunts and my moans intermingle, filling my little bedroom, the whole bed shaking, softly thudding against the wall.
The different angle is getting me worked up in no time, his lap colliding with my ass over and over again, skin slapping against skin. His fingers are digging into the supple flesh of my cheeks, holding onto them.
“You feel so good, fuck.”, he praises me, accompanied by a delicious little groan, and I can feel the words as a tingle up my spine.
His other hand is splayed out on my back, pressing me into the mattress, while he fucks me deep and fast, and I’m just so fucking full. I can feel the wetness drip out of me with every push inside, leaving a mess on his lap.
I turn my head to the side, trying to look at him, while he does me like this. I can see his long dark hair whipping back and forth, with every snap of his hips. I reach my hand back, looking to connect, and he takes it, interlocking his fingers with mine, while his dick is making me lose my mind again. The third orgasm hits me unexpectedly, and I clench around him, squeezing him tightly, his name as a soft sigh on my lips. “König-“
That seems to do it for him as well.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck.", he curses, moaning deeply, the strokes getting sloppy, then he cums inside me, the condom as a barrier in between.
As soon as he catches himself, he pulls back out and turns me around again, snuggling himself on top of me. My breath goes raggedly, my chest expanding wide, I’m still reeling from the sex. But my god. The way he’s holding me now, looking at me. The softness in contrast to the hard fucking before. It’s almost too much.
His eyes are searching my face, a hint of worry in them. "Are you okay?", he asks softly, panting just a tiny bit, a slight red blush on his cheeks. I nod, still finding my ability to speak properly. "Good.", he says, seeming a little relieved, and he slumps down next to me, pulling me against his chest. We stay like that for a few moments, skin against skin, relishing the feeling of our embrace. Post-orgasm bliss is the stuff of sappy rom-coms, not of real life hook-ups. Or so I thought.
"Back in a second.", he mumbles against my temple and gets up. He straightens up, ridiculously tall next to my bed. He heads out the bedroom and my eyes follow the sway of his hips, his delicious booty on full display, his hair swaying with every step, reminding me of how it whipped back and forth while he was fucking me.
I hear the snap of rubber, fumbling with cabinet doors and the running of water.
He comes back, having gotten rid of the condom, a glass of water and a wet cloth in his hands. He sits beside me on the mattress. "Here, drink a little bit.", he says holding the glass up to my face. I sit up a little bit more, grab it and take a few gulps. I didn't even realise how dry my throat had gotten.
He strokes down my left leg, softly spreading me and then starts to clean me up with the cloth, the warm water washing away the lube and my arousal. We just sit there in the little silence that's only filled by our quiet breaths, my little sips of water and the noises of washcloth against skin. And for a moment I fear that I might get shy now, but the serious yet calm expression on his face, while he washes me, grounds me. Because he just acts like this is the most normal thing to do. When he's done and I've drank all of the water, he puts the glass and the washcloth on the little bedside table and climbs into bed again.
He scoops me up and pulls the blanket over us, covering our naked bodies. "You don't know what you were doing to me in that little outfit of yours.", he whispers into my hair, pressing soft kisses onto it.
I sigh for a moment, my eyes turning down. "Yeah, I really like it too.", I say, the smile on my face staying on despite the little pang I feel in my chest.
He scoots down, coming face to face with me. "Hm, what's going on?", he asks me, whispering softly.
"Just thank you for taking me to the concert today, okay? I don't think I would have had the courage to go alone, even less so wearing a skirt.", I answer timidly, not able to look into his eyes.
"You are very welcome, it was my pleasure.", he says, pressing a kiss to each of my cheeks and then one to my lips. It's soft and sweet, so different from all the other kisses we shared this evening. "Thank you as well, today was my first concert in at least 15 years or so. And it was a lot of fun."
"Then you're welcome as well. Old man.", I say, the teasing making me smile at him.
He chuckles. "You're a cute little thing, you know that?"
I shoot him a look, trying look mad and intimidating, but the amused expression on his face is telling me that I’m not succeeding at that. "I'm neither cute nor little."
"Yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that.", he teases me back, then he gets serious again. "Do you want me to go?", he asks, searching my eyes.
I shake my head, my hands roaming his body, softly stroking and squeezing. "No, you can stay the night.", I say lightly. "If you want to."
"Good, cause I do.", he answers, pulling me into him, squeezing me against his broad chest, his big arm lying on my back, the fingers softly digging into my ass. My cheek snuggles against his pec, while I play with the strands of his hair, feeling how I get calmer and sleepier in his embrace.
"Quick question.", he pipes up and the mischief in his voice lets me perk up. "Have you ever been woken up by getting eaten out?"
I give him the full sideeye while I slowly shake my head. The devilish grin turning up his mouth makes him look like he's already thinking about it and in his mind, it is fucking delicious.
"Would you like to try it out?"
The expression on my face doesn't change as I try to mask the wave of arousal washing over me from those words alone. Enticing and just a little bit kinky, and nobody ever offered to do that to me before. "Yes.", I answer, not able to suppress the little breathiness in my voice.
He chuckles, pressing another kiss to my lips, nuzzling into the crook of my neck. “Then I guess, you’ll have to go to sleep soon…”
part 5
~ More Stuff in the Masterlist ~
send help, i'm melted on the floor now 🫠
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bb-eilish · 3 months
Text
Foreplay
--
pairing; Anakin x fem!reader
a/n: I'm taking requests rn, the more gross and taboo the better pls!!
not proofread, directly from my brain to the internet
--
It was odd honestly. You've been dreaming of your sex life for forever now and it's actually started, though it was after you started your 20's. You couldn't really complain though, you couldn't really say a whole lot at all when Anakin's cock was usually lodged down your throat or buried as deep as possible inside you.
It was like fire between you, liquid fire that threatened to burn and never slow. The sex was great, obviously, but it was what was leading up to sex that swung you off your feet.
"My love? I'm finally back from the dealership. Almost had to sleep there". You hear down the hall, you were stuffed in your bedroom at the moment and Anakin had just gotten to your apartment. The smile that washed over your face wasn't even voluntary at this point, it was muscle memory. His large steps get closer until he's peaking inside the room, his gaze landing on your back as you sift through your dresser looking for something to sleep in.
"Took you long enough, you only left five hours ago". You chuckle, peering over your shoulder as he steps closer. So close that he wraps his arms around your middle; nestling his face in the crook of your neck. "I'm glad you're back, was worried I was gonna have to go to bed without you". Even with his face mushed into your skin he scoffs. "I'd run home before that could even happen, don't you worry, Pretty. Are you getting ready for bed?" He asks, unwrapping himself from you to search through the few drawers he's claimed in your dresser.
You open your mouth to answer but the words hiccup in your throat as he casually takes off his shirt. You've seen him naked a bunch now, but you'd never get used to such a sight. "Yeah...yeah I am, just gotta get undressed".
Anakin's eyebrow quirks at the small but very telling reaction. So he waits for you to find a shirt, your fingers hooking into the material you're wearing with the intent to pull it off, but instead you cast over a glance to confirm whether he's watching or not.
He is.
And it causes your skin to burn the second you meet his gaze, especially when that damned smirk ever so slightly pulls at the corner of his plump lips.
"What?" You ask softly, your stomach doing flips in your body.
"Keep going, we're going to bed aren't we?" The reply is teasing and you can feel your face heating effectively.
"I will.." You let out a nervous laugh, slightly lifting the material more to show him you plan on taking it off.
"Do it, or do you need some help?" He begins, taking a step closer. "Wouldn't mind helping my baby, y'know? Taking this off..." The air in the room feels like it's been heated up and yet sucked out at the same time. His fingers pluck your tank top's strap and pulls it, letting it snap against your skin.
"You're gonna let me help you right? Been thinking of you all day--these all day". Large, warm hands grope you over your bra and shirt, yet it feels as though there's no barriers at all. You let out a shaky breath and nod, gripping the edge of the dresser behind you.
"Words, Pretty, you know that". He scolds lightly.
"Yes...please, missed you". The breathy admission has a lusty smile etching its way across his face and he doesn't wait another second before he's pulling off the thin layer of your shirt; eyeing the exposed skin and the way your bra is decorated with the sinful sight of your cleavage.
"There we go, gotta take this off too, don't I? Pretty girl always needs my help, doesn't she?" He mumbles, his hands sprawl across your sides, goosebumps prickling over the affected area. He drifts his hands to your back, moving up to your bra clasp and removing it with practiced ease.
A shiver runs down your back, from the cool air and from the way he bites his lip the second he gets an eyeful of your breasts. A groan bubbles at the back of his throat and he's quick to press you into the dresser, his hands scrambling to scoop up your half naked figure and hoist you onto the flat surface. He's almost eye level with your nipples and it causes his pants to tighten significantly.
"So pretty, baby, such pretty fuckin' tits you have". A second later he's leaning forward and sloppily kissing your collarbone, his tongue pokig out at certain times.
His lips move lower and he drags his moist bottom lip down the valley between your breasts. The action has your heart stuttering and a gush of liquid to wet a spot on your panties.
"Anakin". You whimper softly, moving your hands to glide and explore his arms and torso.
"I know, baby, know you need me". He decides to stop teasing and to finally kiss in circles around your left nipple, soon taking it into his mouth and moaning like it was his favorite meal. Your mouth falls open and your hand grips the curls that rest at the back of his head. The way his tongue switches between harsh licks and gentle swirls has your mind becoming hazy and numb, Anakin prefers you like this. Needy, debauched, only thing on your mind being him and his cock.
A gasp and a choked moan leave you suddenly when he meanly bites down on your sensitive bud. The pain tingles into pleasure and you're squirming, the ache in between your thighs beginning to become a problem.
"Anakin, fuck, I need more, gotta give me more, please". You beg, the words a tad slurred as you dig your nails into his scalp and the skin of his sun-kissed shoulder.
He pulls away, his lips wet as he flicks his gaze to yours. "Poor baby, is your pussy already wet? Just from me playing with your tits? God, baby, you're such a pathetic little thing, hm? Can't even touch you without you wanting more". His words are meant to fully push you over the edge, meant to make thinking even harder.
You whine in response, dragging him closer. He offers a chuckle and a quick glance before he's digging his fingers under your pajama pants and dragging them down and off. He then pushes your legs apart, the grip of your thigh firm. Your bottom lip is trapped under your teeth as you take in his reaction, clenching around nothing at it.
"Tsk tsk, I knew it. Bet you're thinking of all the things I could do to you right now. Like.." He starts, his hand drifting to the wet patch on your panties and pressing into it. Your posture slumps further and you breathe heavy. "I could finger you first, press into that little hole of yours, maybe get you to squirt a couple times before I get my mouth on your clit".
He rips his gaze from where he thumbs your clit lightly, the action becoming harder as seconds pass.
"You always sound so pretty when I eat your pretty pussy. Or are you thinking about what I'll do when I finally fuck you? When I finally get my cock out and fill you up again? Could take you like this". He says, emphasizing his point by pulling you to the edge and letting you feel how hard he's become with a roll of his hips into yours. You whine but he keeps going.
"Or I could bend you over it, pull your hair". One of his hands moves up to grip the strands of your hair, a fist full as he pulls your head back. His tongue wets his lips before he sloppily plants wet kisses upon the column of your throat, soon moving to your ear and brushing over the skin of it.
A shiver wracks your body before he speaks again, his voice low and thick with lust as he almost whispers into your ear.
"Tell you how dirty, pathetic, disgusting, you are for enjoying my cock so much". He unfortunately pulls away a second later, an inch away from your face now, his hands back on your thighs.
"So, what'll it be, Pretty?"
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drdemonprince · 5 months
Note
The article regarding about annoying queer people sparked a by now long forgotten memory.
When I went to my first pride I snuck out secretly and thus was there after the parade. Most people were already some form of drunk or high(didn't know that at the time, I was 15 and naive beyond hope)
That was also the first time I saw puppies ever. In retrospect I must have stared and seemed like one of those annoying "no kink at pride" puriteens. They probably just wanted to allow themselves a small joke but what happened in praxis was, that a grown, white man in only puppy mask and boxers crawled up to me, stood up, started sniffing my breasts and when I started panicking and running away he run after me and everyone else watched and laughed. I think I screamed for help or cryed to please leave me be and was ignored but I can't remember much past the fear.
To them it was probably a small joke but to me it set me back for years. I didn't go to pride in that city ever again and took years to move past "no kink at pride" opinions, an opinion I didn't even have before that.
I felt incredibly isolated and wearing a small rainbow bracelet and cutting my hair took so much bravery. And it earned a lot of backlash too?
So often I see coloured hair and pins as this cutesy cringe thing of no consequence, but for me it resulted in hours upon of arguments and insults. It was worth it, because it helped me built my own identity apart from my families bigotry, but it sure wasn't fun or cutesy. Ultimately it led me to becoming brave enough to actually discover who I am and start making connections with the wider queer community.
Thankfully I had no social media accounts or I would have had some truly stupid arguments.
What I'm saying is, yes young queers can be annoying and it can be tiring to deal with them but being an asshole and vilifying them isn't the solution.
Making fun of teenagers doesn't make yourself more valid and doesn't give you the status of being an old experienced queer.
I'm saying teenagers here but the fun thing about queer people is that we can discover ourselves at any point in time. So it's less teenagers and more people newly discovering themselves as queer.
I get how annoying they can be very well now, doing voluntary work at pride does that.
Do many of those we consider annoying queers hold some harmful opinions? Yeah sure. (The amount of white queers, teens or adults, not dealing with systemic oppression beyond their own is staggering and they more than deserve to be called out. Just to be very clear, when I talk about annoying behaviour I do NOT mean microagressions or discrimination in any way)
But annoying behaviour is not synonymous to that and maybe we should all just start being less mean in public spaces? I get how satisfying it can be to get a hit tweet via a bitchy twitter reply now, but quite honestly I am more ashamed of that now than when I was running around in hoodies and short hair being painfully naive.
Because then I wasn't being mean to anyone. I had some stupid takes sure but no outlet. On twitter I was making fun of people to validate my own queer-ness. (Personally I think I was covering up for the fact that I was afraid the queer people I worked so hard to be part of wouldn't consider me one of their own. So I worked hard to show how I'm not one of "those queers".)
Either way, thanks for reading all this and thank you for sharing the article because it is something I strongly agree with. Just let people be annoying without making fun of them for it. It doesn't need to be a big deal.
Thank you for this wonderful, vulnerable, honest message about your slow path to self-acceptance in the face of a lot of barriers, anon. I'm glad that despite everything you've found your way.
Yeah, I think queer people have many reasons to feel terrified at the rising "no kink at pride" discourse, but sometimes when we lash out at puriteens we sound a bit like the childfree people who say that they hate kids?? Like, we're blaming literal children for an ideology of protecting "The Family" that has been foisted upon us.
I'm guilty of it. I was HAUNTED by the social pressure to get married and pregnant and raise a bunch of kids. It caused me massive dysphoria and didn't jibe with my queer identity. But I rebelled against it for far too long by saying that I hated kids.
It was not the kids' fault! It was the ideological specter of The Family as an institution that isolates and attacks all nonconformity and 'deviant' sexuality! Me being an asshole to children was not gonna set me free, kids were even more disinfranchised than I was!! I don't think I was ever overtly cruel to children, just kind of aloof and freaked out by them, but I definitely *did* say some numbskulled shit to my friends with kids a few times. Completely missing how disempowered mothers (and it was usually mothers) are in society BECAUSE of these same forces .
And I think something similar is going on here. Queer people are tired of having "Family Friendliness" shoved down our throats by corporations and conservatives, and so then we lash out... at young queer people. it's fine to have 18+ areas and events; It's very, very important to me that spaces like Furfest have them. But that's not the same thing as claiming young people have no space in our community as a whole. And I do think we need to erode the barriers between the adult and child worlds in a whole lot of ways, and reorient our attitudes toward nudity, sexuality, roleplaying, etc in public life. but that also doesn't mean a pup should run you out of a pride parade actually fucking sexually harassing you.
It feels great to be able to talk about this stuff! Thanks for your message.
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landograndprix · 1 year
Text
fantasy ❁ l.n 
summary: biggest simp on the lando norris simp train, just an ordinary girl living her normal life until she gets noticed by Mclaren's golden boy.
requested: yes! requests are open!
a/n: no you don't understand how much fun it was to make this one :') this would also be my nightmare tho like nah, I'd be so embarrassed 💀
☆☆☆☆☆
landonorris
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liked by maxfewtrell, y/nusername and 672,514 others
landonorris singapore 📸
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csainzzz @y/nusername babe wake up, new lando pics dropped
y/nusername violated. deceased. going back to bed.
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ln4cz55 😍😍
bott_ass half these comments are people tagging @y/nusername 😭
quadrant2000 CEO of the lando simp club 👑
y/nusername solid 10 if you ask me
landoscar 👏
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lnfour
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liked by y/nusername, landonorris and 46,543 others
lnfour new collection dropping soon 😎
tagged: landonorris
view all 131 comments
carlandobaby at this point I'm working my ass off just so I can get merch 😭
lanfour shut up and take my money
y/nusername do i get the guy with it when I place an order or?
zoeyyyy y/n asking the real questions
sharl_16 girl– 😭
lnfour maybe we can arrange something 😉
landoscar @y/nusername not ln4 commenting 😭
y/nusername well, that's it lads, it was nice knowing y'all but I'm going to dig my own grave and go lie in it.
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landonorrisfanz
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liked by lnfour, y/nusername and 452 others
landonorrisfanz lando in Australia today!
tagged: landonorris, lnfour
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chilisainz this fit 🙌
hannahh @y/nusername look at your man strutting his stuff and shit 👀
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ferrarifwiends @/landonorris your biggest fan 😂
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y/nusername
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liked by yourbestfrienduser, landonorris and 1,542 others
y/nusername blacknwhite
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byelando mother is mothering
yourbestfrienduser pretty little girlfriend ❤️
lanlando you're so pretty 😭
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y/nusername that's it I'm deactivating.
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, isahernaez and 3,564 others
y/nusername it's in the details 🖤
view all 261 comments
norrisss4 after nearly a year, mother has risen from the dead. 😫
zouey bestie where have you been???
y/nusername I told y'all I was going to move countries? 😉
zouey lmao glad your back 🥰
grussell63 friend, lando's still liking your stuff though
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y/nusername posted on their story
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landonorris
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landonorris meet and greets
tagged: y/nusername
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isahernaez ❤️
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landoscar miss ma'am dipped for a year and shows up with her man, what a flex 😭
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landonorris 🧡🧡🧡
sharllekler alright time for me to simp for charles a bit harder 😭
norrizzz4 we're rooting for you! :')
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awearywritersworld · 1 year
Text
stay as long as you need
fushiguro toji x reader summary: toji can't stop hanging around his new neighbor, even though she has a boyfriend. oh well, he knows he's better for her anyway. w/c: 1.2k tags/warnings: hurt/comfort. angst to fluff. domestic violence perpetrated by reader's boyfriend, but nothing terribly graphic; the incident is discussed after the fact, not depicted. implied age gap. protective!toji. toji actually being nice. cliche "who did this to you" moment. fem!reader a/n: WHY IS HE SO HOT??????? I JUST WANT HIM TO TAKE CARE OF MEEEEEEEEE (OR CRUSH ME WITH HIS THIGHS, IM NOT PICKY) on a less unhinged note, thanks for reading!! masterlist
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"need some help?"
you nearly jump upon hearing the words, having been lost in your own little world. when you turn around, you're met with a dark haired, well built man and just the sight of him makes your cheeks feel hot.
"oh, i- um," you glance between him and the heavy box in your hands.
he's already taking it from you though, effortlessly balancing it in one hand before opening the door for you with the other.
"thanks," you squeak out, stepping inside your new apartment building.
he smirks down at you, eyes raking over your body. toji isn't exactly the good samaritan type, but for a pretty little thing like you, he can certainly make an exception.
the elevator button lights up when he presses it. "just moving in?"
"yup! third floor. getting everything up there has been quite the ordeal, so i appreciate your help," you explain sweetly.
when the metal doors slide open, he lets you step inside first.
"hm, all by yourself? no boyfriend in the picture?" well, the sorcerer killer has never been one for subtly.
"yeah, actually," you return sheepishly. "he's just out with his friends at the moment."
"that so?" you don't see the look of judgement that crosses his face, though it isn't at all directed toward you.
once you emerge on your floor, toji follows along just a step behind you. he can't help his amusement when you stop at your door. "would you look at that. i guess we're neighbors now."
his head nods toward his own apartment, just two doors down from yours. "oh good! i'm glad this wasn't too far out of your way."
"don't worry about it, wouldn't have been any trouble either way."
you offer him a bashful smile before your door clicks open, revealing quite a few boxes just inside. "you can just put that anywhere, don't mind the mess.. i'm (y/n), by the way."
"toji." he places it on top of one of the other boxes, honestly impressed that you managed to get so many upstairs by yourself. "can i have your car keys?"
he thinks the look of confusion that crosses your features is just too cute. "what for?"
he chuckles because it should be obvious, but clearly you aren't used to being taken care of. "to get the rest of your boxes, princess."
~~~
the next afternoon, toji answers a knock at his door and finds you on the other side. you've got a plate of fresh cookies in your hand, which you shyly offer to the tall man. "these are for you. thank you so much for all your help yesterday! i couldn't have done it without you."
"thanks, you didn't have to," he tells you, although he's happy you did. when he pulls them from your grasp, his hands brush yours. he invites you in, insisting he can't enjoy them alone, but really he just wants to get to know you.
and he does. over the next few weeks, you spend a surprising amount of time in one another's company. whenever he bumps into you in the hall, he'll chat with you for a while, even (or, especially) when he's running late to a job.
one day you mention that a shelf you ordered came disassembled, so he offers to come over and put it together for you. of course you show up at his door the next day with a new plate of cookies.
another morning, toji groans when he discovers that he's out of tea, but quickly realizes it's the perfect excuse to knock on your door. when it swings open, he swallows thickly, taking in your tiny shorts and thin tank top. it was obvious you'd just woken up.
you're no better than he is with the way your eyes trail over his fitted tshirt, then down to the sweatpants that hang loosely around his waist. you're both too preoccupied staring to notice the other doing the same.
"mornin', sleepy beauty," he says with a lopsided grin.
"good morning, toji." you return his smile, your greeting a saccharine melody to his ears. oh, the things he'd do to have you all to himself.
he explains his predicament and you're more than happy to invite him inside. you both sit at your kitchen table, nursing a cup of tea and chatting about your day. the domesticity off it all leaves a pleasant taste in his mouth, which is bizarre seeing as up until a few weeks ago, he'd have found the thought down right repulsive.
but he just can't get you out of his head. you're too sweet for your own good, too young to know what you deserve in a man, and he's more than willing to show you.
he knows you're not available, but makes no attempt to stifle his growing fondness toward you. after all, he'd only ever seen your boyfriend once.
you were returning from a rare afternoon out just as he was leaving to pick up something for lunch. you looked so good in your cute little dress that he hardly even noticed your boyfriend at first.
"hey, (y/n)," toji greeted you. "who's this?"
he didn't give you a chance to speak, just pulled you into his side. "her boyfriend."
"ah," he leered, his nose crinkled. "i wasn't sure since i never see you around."
your eyes flickered between the two men somewhat nervously. toji towered over your boyfriend, a feat he took great satisfaction in.
a humorless laugh came from your left. "prefer to have her over at my place."
toji didn't respond right away, just looked down at you, taking note of your quietness. he briefly recalled the time you mentioned how much it bothered you that your boyfriend never came to visit, that you always had to make the effort.
"right.. well, you're a lucky man." he looked much more smug by then, his head falling to the side. "your girl has the best cookies around."
toji moves past both of you without waiting for a reply, roughly clapping your boyfriend on the shoulder. "see you around, (y/n)."
~~~
nearly two weeks later, toji's leaving his apartment late in the evening, as his current job can really only be taken care of during the nighttime hours. he doesn't expect to see many people in the halls, so he's surprised to find you at your apartment door.
the hood of your sweatshirt is pulled over your head, obscuring your face from his view. "(y/n)?"
you don't respond, so he takes a step toward you. it's only then he notices the way your hands are trembling, struggling with the lock. he reaches out, but when his fingers brush your arm, you jump back as if you'd been completely oblivious to his presence.
"hey-" he begins to say, but stops once he sees your face. his eyes darken and his jaw tenses, the veins in his neck becoming more prominent as a result.
your cheekbone is bright red, a small cut stretching across the center of the mark. your eyes watch him, wide and fearful, and you're all but frozen in place.
"who did this to you?"
he's struggling to keep his composure, the sight of your bruised face enough to have his heart hammering away angrily in his chest. you look away, tears forming in your eyes, and you can't bring yourself to respond.
"was it him?" he presses.
you nod, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth in an attempt to keep from crying. "i-it's okay, though. he didn't mean it, really, and-"
"look me in the face and try that again."
you meet his gaze, somewhat unwillingly, and whimper. "i.. i can't."
he sighs quietly, his job already forgotten for the night, and moves toward you. he remembers how you flinched away from him just moments ago. "..can i touch you?"
you nod once more and he hesitantly pulls you against his chest. it's getting harder and harder to keep your emotions in check, especially with the slow circles his hand is drawing on your back.
"i was so scared, toji," you finally admit, voice barely above a whisper.
"i know, but you're safe now. won't let 'im touch you ever again," he promises, fully intent on keeping it.
his words push you over the edge and you grab at his shirt as you begin to weep, your knees buckling beneath you. he supports your weight, rocking you back and forth. "you're okay. it's going to be okay."
after a minute or two, he finally hears you take a shaky breath and relief fills his chest at the sound. "see? just like that, baby. in and out."
you do as he says and after a few more breaths, he pulls away from you and takes your hand. "c'mon. let's get you cleaned up."
leading you into his apartment, he goes straight to the bathroom. you gasp when he grabs you by the hips and hoists you up onto the counter before searching for his first aid kit. when he pulls it down from the cabinet, he moves to stand between your legs.
grabbing you by the chin, he tilts your head to get a better look your injury. the redness is already transitioning to a darker hue and he knows it'll look even worse tomorrow.
"gonna clean the cut, okay? it might sting."
"okay," you sniffle.
he rips open an alcohol wipe, dabbing it gently against your cheekbone. when you wince in pain, he offers a quiet apology, but he's finished before long, having applied a bit of ointment as well.
"thank you," you murmur.
both of his hands find your thighs, resting on the area just above your knees. "don't thank me. not for this."
there's an edge to his voice, but you know it's not directed toward you. your hands settle on top of his own, quelling his anger for the time being.
"you know," he grunts, his gaze lingering on your cheek before it shifts toward your eyes. "i could never lay a hand on you."
his expression is much softer now than it was in the hallway and he savors the small smile that tugs at your lips. "i know, toji."
as he looks down at you, he knows he's done for. hell, he's known it for a while now. you deserve to be adored. taken care of. made to feel good... and toji is more than confident in his ability to do so.
for a fleeting moment, he considers the fact it wouldn't be hard to find out where your boyfriend lives, to make sure he never raises a hand to you again, but your gentle voice pulls him from his thoughts.
"can i stay with you tonight?" you ask meekly.
"yeah, 'course.. you can stay as long as you need."
jjk taglist: @torusmochi
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anton-luvr · 11 months
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hi!! love your works so i wanted to request a fic where y/n and her bf (riize member of your choice) of a few months are together and since it’s only a few months they are all sweet and cute, they didn’t really approach the idea of sex yet.. but he gets his first boner with y/n and at first it’s all awkward and shi but then it gets suggestive but they don’t go all the way yk because it’s their first approach to the topic. hope you understood the request and thank you in advance 😭💖
# CLOSER THAN EVER.
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𖦹 bf!anton x fem!reader | fluff & HEAVILY suggestive 𖦹 note ; this is so anton coded no one can tell me otherwise... thank u anon!! its my first writing something like this and honestly,, i feel like this kinda sucks lol but i hope u like it :')
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"Does this taste okay?"
Anton looks up from the bowl of ice cream he was holding to see you stretching a spoon of chocolate sauce towards him.
"It tastes kinda weird," you mumble, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "But it's not expired yet."
Anton licks the sauce off the spoon, concentrating on its flavor.
"Okay, that's definitely weird." he agrees, wincing as he's met with a gross combination of sour and sweet. "We are not going to eat that."
Laughing at your boyfriend's reaction, you turn away to toss the bottle into the bin.
"Here, eat some ice cream." Anton suggests, getting a spoonful for you. "It takes the taste right out."
You hum happily around the spoon at the taste of the sweet icy treat, excited to eat more during your movie night later.
"I'm so glad we got vanilla flavor," you sighed. "It's so go-"
And all of a sudden, Anton's lips are on yours, cutting you off.
His warm tongue moves and licks against your cold lips, sending goosebumps all over your body at the sensation.
"Y-You had ice cream on your lips." Anton mumbles when he pulls away, face burning red.
You're blushing too, but you laugh, finding it adorable.
"Maybe just say you wanna kiss me next time, hm?" you tease, wrapping your arms around Anton's neck.
The ice cream is long forgotten when the both of you lock lips again, Anton's arms tight around your waist as he slowly backs you against the kitchen counter.
"You look so pretty today," he sighs, brushing your hair aside and leaning down to kiss your neck.
It blows your mind at how when you first met Anton, he had been a blushing stumbling mess. Always avoiding your eye contact, stuttering endlessly, and always turning crimson red at any form of physical contact.
But now here you were, eyelids fluttering shut in pleasure while his teeth grazes softly against your neck. He doesn't stop even while leading you to the sofa, letting out a soft grunt when you straddle him.
Now, with the both of you heading into the eighth month of your relationship, you've achieved your fair share of milestones.
Starting off with the basics like holding hands and cuddling, you were now at the stage of hot and heavy makeouts, but nothing past that.
And since neither of you had any experience, both of you agreed to take things slow.
"When we're both ready," Anton had said back then to you, lips prettily swollen and panting from your first makeout session.
You wonder where he stands on the matter now, when something snaps you out of your thoughts.
Anton had stopped his actions, his flushed and shy face buried in your chest instead. "W-What's wrong?" you ask, dazed and confused as you run your hands through his hair.
He doesn't say anything, merely shifting around a bit to let you feel it.
You gulp when you do, eyes widening at your boyfriend.
"Is that- Are you...?" you mumbled, flustered.
He burns in embarrassment as he nods, nervously biting his bottom lip. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for it to... do that, you just look so pretty today and you sounded so-"
It's your turn to cut him off for tonight, kissing him strongly on the lips.
"Don't apologize, it happens." you whisper.
"And... I can help you out if you want?" you offer, looking at him warily.
Anton's eyes widen at your question, and he manages to muster a small "Y-Yeah, please.", desperation heavy in his tone.
He's barely gotten the words out of his lips when you kiss him again, hips experimentally moving against his.
The curly haired boy lets out a loud whine at this, head falling back on the sofa, and you've gotten your green light.
Airy whimpers and moans slowly fill your living room as you continue, the pleasurable friction making Anton's head spin while you kiss each other messily and noisily.
Adrenaline courses through you while his hands feel you up, newfound pleasure burning like fire at wherever his fingertips touched.
"F-Feels so good," Anton pants, hiding his face in the crook of your neck.
He starts leaving hickeys again, the sharpness of his teeth and warmth of his tongue adding on to the pleasure. "Don't stop, please." he whines.
And so, you don't.
The movie becomes the last thing on your minds as you spend the rest of the night just like that; lips connected, hands exploring each other, repeated confessions of love, and hearts racing - closer than ever.
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