#ITS JUST ME WRITING SOMETHING ID WANNA READ 😭

[haliaiii]

Val’s Hover bike! (oc)

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[evera-era]

your writing is the best to ever exist in this website istg youre just too good. its so convincing cause no one portrays ellie as good as you do 😭😭😭💗💗

id love to read something along the lines of like getting back from a stressed day at work and ellie helps u relax (if u know what i mean😙)

THIS MADE MY HEART SWELL AW TYSM :’) sure thing bby, comin’ right up!! — nsfw, minors DNI

lay back.

ellie williams x afab!reader

warnings: lotsa teasing, kissing, ellie spits on it, oral r!receiving, aftercare

“Hey baby,” Ellie chimes, her head peeking over from the living room. You sigh, shoulders drooping as you closed the front door.

“Hi, love.”

Her brows furrow as she takes note of the tiredness in your tone. She quickly rises from the couch, turning the corner.

“Is… everything okay?” She asks.

“Yeah,” You reply, taking off your shoes. “Just a rough day at work.”

“Oh,” She murmurs. You nod before heading to the bedroom.

You were quick to undress; eager to be rid of your uniform. Ellie followed behind you as you stripped down to your underwear.

“Wanna talk about it?” She questions, trying to stop her eyes from grazing down your bare body.

“Not… not really.” You respond.

Ellie bit down on her lip as her gaze traveled. She knew it was kind of wrong, drooling over you when you were so tired, but she couldn’t help herself. Not when you were topless and the only thing clinging to your body was a sheer set of panties.

“Today was so damn stressful.” You mutter. “I’m just… done with work. Just wanna relax.”

You jump when her unexpected hands roamed over the small of your back. The attention made you blush.

“Relax?” She raises her eyebrow. “Hm?”

Ellie places a kiss against the spot where your ear met your neck. And then down by your collarbone. And another, on the curve of your breast.

“Ellie,” You whine.

“I’m sorry— I— you just, you look so good…” She says. “And… I can make you feel better, you know.”

She presses another kiss dangerously close to your nipple, and you absentmindedly lean into her touch. A small whimper escapes your lips.

“B-But—“

“But… what, hm?” She replies, teeth grazing against your hardened bud.

You smile down at her lazily. “I’m tired, love, I really am.”

“Mm, that’s fine.” She hums, green eyes looking up at you. “I’ll do all the work. Pretend like I’m not even here.”

Her lips wrap around your nipple, pulling and sucking at it as you heave a desperate sigh. Your hands find themselves in her hair as you close your eyes.

“Fuck,” You whisper, wetness gathering in your panties as you pull and tug at her auburn strands. “You know I can’t ignore you like this, Ellie.”

“Why not?” She says against your skin.

“B-Because,” She bites at your nipple, and you stifle a yelp. “Damn you…”

Her chuckle is scruffy as she lowers herself even more, peppering kisses along your tummy. Her hands travel up and down your waist as she relishes in the touch and feel of your body.

“You’re so fucking pretty,” She says quietly, teeth grazing underneath your belly button. “C’mon. Let me help you relax, baby.”

As the back of your knees hit the bed, Ellie drags her kisses lower and lower, until she’s practically tasting your slick through your panties. The moan that escapes your lips is filthy.

“Oh, fuck,” You groan, absentmindedly rolling your hips up against her mouth. Her hands reach down to grab your thighs and hold them still.

“Mm-mm,” She grunts adamantly. You whine in response; you were eager to actually feel her tongue, absent of the painfully thin fabric.

Her slender fingers toy with the lining of your underwear, sliding underneath a mere half inch before trailing back out. You pull harshly at her hair, to which she halts and looks up at you.

“Excuse you,” She says. Her lips pulled into a smirk, but her eyes were watching you carefully. You knew that look — it was as if she was telling you to behave.

You couldn’t help yourself. Ellie was doing so good, and now you wish you had never said you wanted to relax in the first place. Because you knew she was gonna go slow with it, take her time.

Her fingers slide under the band one more time before finally pulling the fabric away from your cunt. The cold air was a small shock against your wet, exposed clit.

She laughs a little, rubbing her thumb against your hood.

“So juicy,” Ellie huffs. “You really did need this, huh?”

You hum in response, cunt clenching around nothing as she teases you. It wasn’t fair, the effect she had on you.

She drags your wetness up and down your slit, biting down on her bottom lip. “Look at that,” She mutters, eyes trained on the way your clit glistens under her touch.

You opened your mouth, about to argue over how agonizing she was being when you feel her harsh spit hit your cunt. Before you even have time to react, she’s lapping it back up, sending you into a daze.

“Oh my god,” You moan, taken aback by her actions. Her tongue felt ecstasy.

You lifted your legs, wrapping them around her head to pull her in even more. She moans in response, continuing to messily eat you out.

Her hair fell into her face, but she didn’t care. She was dead set on pleasing you. She rested a hand against your hip, to which you held in place as you whined and wriggled underneath her.

“Feels so good,” You whisper, face scrunching up in pleasure as you relished in the feeling of her. “Please don’t stop.”

Ellie obeys your command for the next few minutes, licking and sucking on your cunt until your breath quickens and your legs begin to shake around her neck.

Your moans get louder as your high gets closer. She’s careful not to change her pace.

“E-Ellie—“ You choke out, tugging on her auburn strands as every stroke of her tongue becomes heightened. “Please—“

“Go on,” She hums, looking up at you from between your legs. “Cum on my tongue, baby.”

It was all you needed to hear. Within seconds, your entire body is seizing up, hips bucking and eyes closed as you came. It was the hardest you had cum in a while, so powerful that it left you weak and dizzy.

Ellie chuckles, looking at your puffy clit as she licks it a few more times, getting a final taste. She backs away and returns a minute later with a wet rag.

“You okay, babe?” She asks gently, pressing the warm rag between your legs. You nod, looking up at her.

“Felt s’good,” You say softly. She smiles.

“I’m glad.” She whispers, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Get some rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

You sunk into her touch, eyelids fluttering closed.

You were gonna sleep real good tonight.

[lekeyeh24]

EARTH 42 MILES MORALES HEAD CANNONS.‼️

EARTH 42 MILES MORALES HEAD CANNON

(some do contain sumt so if u dont like it please skip if u do not want to see also ‼️‼️THEY ARE AGED UP TO ADULTS I DO NOT WRITE ABT CHARACTERS WHEN THEY ARE UNDER AGE‼️‼️)

EARTH 42 MILES MORALES

miles loves his moms cooking so if u can cook like her he will marry u.

he hates when a guy looks at u he wants u all to himself if he sees a guy look at u he will lift ur chin while looking at the guy and kiss u.

when u go out by yourself he has eyes on u everywhere making sure u are ok

he will give u money to get pamper yourself “mami lemme do something special for u today” “no miles u always spoil me” “its for u id go broke just for u to be happy”

he would bring up kids and marriage ant how he wants to marry you and have 3-4 kids

he is deff a dog person 100% if he had a dog his name would be Draco or sum like that

when u are at home you get one of his jackets and sleep in them and when he gets hime loves seeing u sleep in them

when he gets sick u are always there to be there for him & vice versa.

‼️WARNING THIS CONTAIN SUMT‼️ ‼️READ AT YOUR OWN RISK ALSO THEY ARE AGED UP TO ADULTS NOT MINNORS‼️‼️‼️

miles loves to grab your throat

drity talk

he loves when you wanna take control sometimes

he can go for HOURS ON END

make up yk🌝

he makes you feel sum typa way when he looks in your eyes

he makes you look at him while he is doing yk to u(see now this is tm for me fr✋🏼🌝)

he loves when u stretch out his name like “milesssssss” or “papiiiii” “sum like that yall😭”

he loves when you cry during yk it gives him motivation ig

he grabs u by the throat

he likes to tease you alot when yk

when someone calls you u have answer it and he just keeps going

he loves when you say stuff to him

yall have a safe word i feel like it would be pineapple or sum

MK YALL DATS IT LMK IF YALL LIKE IT AND WANT MORE

[sublimecatgalaxy]

♥️ Rafe Cameron Masterlist ♥️

This is a masterlist dedicated to things I've written about Rafe Cameron.

Check out my Prompt List and my Character List in my Masterpost which is pinned for more info on who I write for and some inspiration for requests.

Liability (Completed): masterlist

Read It and Weep: Part 1 ; Part 2 ; Part 3

A Lot Worse:

Summary/Request: "Sarah and wheezie realizing rafes good mood is actually because of a new woman in his life?"

Third Wheel:

Summary/Request: "rafe cameron x reader??? PLEASE?? when wheezie third wheeling but she loves it bcs she can see her brother become so soft…

The Storm:

Summary/Request: "Rafe Cameron x tutor!reader? I know it’s been done a lot but it’s a really fun idea.

Answer It:

Summary/Request: "hey babe may i request a blurb\fic of Rafe x Pogue!reader where theyre secretely fucking and JJ calls her while theyre doing it and rafe tells her to pick it up and doesnt stop hile on the call"

Soothing Bruised Skin:

Summary/Request: "Daddy Rafe 🥰 with “come on, let’s get you cleaned up"

Need Help:

Summary/Request: "a little hurt/comfort with Rafe 🥺"

When and What:

Summary/Request: "could you do rafe x reader with a broken bone or something where they are just super loving and cute together !!!!"

Stupid Sometimes:

Summary/Request: "can you write one where she has a to patch rafe up after a fight and its an angst fluff typa thing i love you and your writing sm btw 💗"

Fussy:

Summary/Request: "any fluff or hurt/comfort related to my life rn would be appreciated ❤️ with our baby daddy Rafe of course 😃"

Shitty Nurse:

Summary/Request: "can I have rafe with a reader with a broken neck 🥹😭 for legal reasons 😭"

A Giant:

Summary/Request: "Can you write Rafe Cameron x a teenmom!reader? Whether it be his kid or not, I just wanna see what he would be like dating someone who has a kid and how awkward he'd be (cuz it's not like he has a very good role model to go off of lol)."

Only Place:

Summary/Request: "Could you do prompts 1 and 3? Maybe some angst??"

Top Heavy:

Summary/Request: "I need a part 2 for my fav fic (you know what I'm talking about hehe) with our baby rafe! id love it if maybe he's helping her with daily stuff, just being a big teddy bear and the banter."

Manipulator is Manipulated:

Summary/Request: "can you write an rafe x routledge!reader with a lot of angst? like the reader is trying to manipulate rafe in order to gain her trust, and somehow rafe is falling for her (and her lies) (nothing violent)."

Annoyance:

Summary/Request: "“I guess I didn’t realize I was such a nuisance.”"

Sass:

Summary/Request: "'I really don't like you.' - 'And I really don't believe you.' Friends to lovers."

Puppy Dog Eyes:

Summary/Request: "Rafe w/ broken neck reader again pls :) you can include these lines if you want to hehe or you can work your own creative magic!! ily"

Seafoam Green:

Summary/Request: "I would love this I just thought you would like to know that I’m not wearing any underwear right now. Do what you must with this information.’ With Rafe and kook!reader ❤️"

Lectured:

Summary/Request: "Argument/fighting + hidden injury- “whose blood is that?”

Going Down:

Summary/Request: "Rafe Cameron smut where he's literally just going down on her and absolutely loving it? I feel like this guy would definitely do it every chance he could humanly do it."

You Up?:

Summary/Request: "Rafe Cameron smut friends with benefits? Super playful vibes and stuff but hard core smut LOL"

Ups and Downs:

Summary/Request: "This time, her getting the brace off + having atrophied muscles, maybe some PT appointments, all the things."

Growing Pains:

Summary/Request: "hi bestie 😃 I was wondering if you could recreate me and the hubbys first Valentine’s Day with Rafe."

Around Town:

Summary/Request: "Hi! Can I request prompt 22 and trope 4 for soft!rafexreader?"

Coward:

Summary/Request: "Rafe with the quotes "Go fuck yourself rafe" and "Fuck me yourself you coward""

Migraine:

Summary/Request: "could u possibly do a rafe imagine where the reader has a migraine so rafe takes care of her?"

Deeper:

Summary/Request: "Can you please do a Rafe Cameron imagine where the reader is a Pogue and has a secret friends with benefits with Rafe, which was going well until they started catching feelings for each other and became increasingly jealous."

Birthday:

Summary/Request: "'Rafe x birthday reader for me. PS: make it extra smuttyyy ☺️'"

Sloppy:

Summary/Request: "reader and rafe getting high together and having sloppy sex?"

Never Let You Go:

Summary/Request: "Would you just do something super duper fluffy with Rafe? Like her trying to leave when he’s holding her but he just refuses to let go or something like that?"

Sweet:

Summary/Request: "MORE SOFT!RAFE PLS I'M BEGGING"

Just Life:

Summary/Request: "s it possible that u could write something where the reader is rly stressed and she carries all her tension in her shoulders, and rafe notices so he gives her a nice long back rub?"

Beach Day:

Summary/Request: "is it possible that you could do a request where rafe and the reader have a beach day together?"

Hot Stuff:

Summary/Request: "could I please request one where Rafe suddenly realises Sarah's BFF from childhood is hot."

Wake Up:

Summary/Request: "I love your fluffy Rafe stuff so I was wondering if you could write something fluffy? Maybe waking up with Rafe?"

Blocked:

Summary/Request: "idk if anyone requested this but PLZ PLZ PLZ HEAVY ANGST 12+9 with Rafe"

Bed Ready:

Summary/Request: "ow abt him and the reader just got out of the shower and are getting ready for bed?"

[hanasnx]

heyyy do you have any advice on how to write smut cause its sooo difficult for me *cries in virgin*

ur like one of my fav smutty writers and idk if you have any tips 😭

first off thank u very much i appreciate that :)

this isnt the first time ive been asked for writing tips so im gonna give a lot of info. youre bound to find something useful in this mess

im so sorry but one of my solutions to giving myself confidence in smut-writing was to literally fuck and fuck a lot

after losing my virginity it still wasnt enough experience tbh. so i gave myself room to explore my sexuality and was privileged enough to do it with a partner that encouraged that growth. that experience of fucking sure didnt hinder my smut-writing ability if you know what i mean ;0 but everything else about writing i learned from years of practice. ive been writing since i was in elementary school like id come home from fourth grade and read and write on quotev klsdjfsfj smut writing skills came later post puberty

when i tried writing smut as a virgin i genuinely couldn’t get past the build up. i was fantastic at writing the build up, it was the actual sex part that was hard bcos even tho i had done enough research (i read a lot of porn) it didn’t instill me with enough confidence that i could write it correctly, and so i never did. however! i sure wish i’d committed to it more, so let me see if i can write out some tips that would’ve helped me in the past

(this is just how i write smut, im by no means an expert)

my timeline

the way i write smut is pretty formulaic so i’ll break it down:

hook line ⟹ settings ⟹ build-up ⟹ foreplay ⟹ sex ⟹ ending

☥ hook line. maybe: a dialogue piece to kickstart; an ambiguous line that reels you in; an exciting action. i dont like starting my story with the name/pronouns of a character doing something boring. i.e. “you were getting ready for the day…” idk it’s not the worst thing in the world and we've all done it but just writing out what i try to avoid.

☥ build up is key to me. i have such a hard time reading and writing porn with no plot. i’ll do it sometimes if i like the writer enough, but i rarely write smut without the build up bcos i feel like that’s where the juice is. its whats fun and what you get to play around with bcos the actual sex part of the fic is pretty predictable.

focus on what’s said and unsaid in dialogue between characters. focus on the emotion each of them are feeling and how that emotion manifests into body language.

⟹ dirty talk is not for everyone, but god i love it. literally get nasty with it, this is your writing and we’re all just readin it. build anticipation using dirty talk, make filthy promises, make threats. make your characters talk about the nasty shit they wanna do to each other.

imagine someone you really wanna fuck, imagine the things youd do to them if you had the chance,,, write it into your characters.

☥ foreplay. goes hand in hand with dirty talk, its where the touching starts. decide how you want to play it. who gets oral, who gets fingered. both? one of them? neither and they just go straight to fucking?? i like foreplay, but if youre writing a “quickie” scenario then it may not be in the cards.

lets say it is in the cards tho. so some things to remember:

⟹ foreplay gets the dicks hard. when dicks get hard they leak pre-cum. balls have like no cushion and theyre soft and have little sacks in em that move around. the skin of this genital is often described as velvety bcos its soft. ive honestly never had sex with an uncircumcised penis so i have no idea if there’s a difference between how they feel.

foreplay makes the pussies loose and wet. the inside can be lumpy. it can be ridged or smooth. it can be all kinds of flesh colors like brown and pink.

without the foreplay (which can be verbal communication, or touching of the body or genitals) its a little painful for afabs bcos theyre too tight or too dry. and a flaccid dick is a little unpredictable to try to fit in.

⟹ afabs can have multiple orgasms, amabs are less lucky. afabs can cum and squirt multiple times, amabs can cum multiple times.

⟹ genitals get really sensitive after cumming though. so if you write someone finishing, write out how they might need some time before they finish again or start fucking, or that they get overstimulated getting touched still after they came and that sensitivity is a little uncomfortable.

⟹ the head of the penis is the most sensitive and that’s what makes it cum/orgasm. clits on pussies are the most sensitive and its what makes cum/orgasms happen. its very difficult if not impossible to achieve orgasm (if youve got a pussy) through penetration alone without clit stimulation

⟹ you can cum/squirt and not have an orgasm

☥ sex

⟹ changing positions can change angles and hit new pleasurable spots inside pussies.

⟹ probably write a couple different positions during the sex part, just to keep things fresh.

⟹ sprinkle in dirty talk to prolong the sex scene and to avoid sounding repetitive because if youre writing p in v it’s pretty standard to thrust over and over again until youre done. its a lot less glamorous when you spell it out like that, so you gotta add shit to make the sex scene more enjoyable to the reader whos not actively experience the sex.

☥ ending. i usually end the one shot after the fucking is done.

the smut tips

☥ think back to a time you were really turned on. from a show, from a book, something someone said to you, your own sex life, porn you really liked,,, take inspiration from it. use it and channel that own arousal within you.

if youve got a dirty fantasy and it gets you so hot and bothered thinking about it, write that.

if youve got a partner that fucks you crazy good and supplies you with inspo for dialogue or for settings or for scenarios, write that too. theres been a whole bunch on my blog that was inspired by my boyfriend. not everything, but enough to mention it.

also! another thing that people underestimate is the inspiration you take from other blogs. like mine for example, if you like my stuff take inspo from it. study my writing style and you’ll see all kinds of little tips in subtext id never be able to list for you. i do that with other blogs, i dont copy them but i definitely learn little things i like from them and incorporate it into my writing for a more cohesive story. if i take an idea though i ask for their permission & credit them.

☥ the most important tip i can give you is be as self indulgent as possible. youre wasting time worrying about other people. “will they like this? will people think im weird? what if they think im weird for writing this?” fuck that noise. warn accordingly, and go ham. your self indulgence is your best friend. it’ll guide you through all those dirty things you want to say or do to someone, let it take root and write what excites you. chances are you will find your people, and your fic will be set apart bcos it’s so specific to you that people will be drawn to that. and if theyre not? it ends up not being popular? it doesnt matter! because you had fun writing it right? fuck yea u did

☥ the types of words you use are so important. words that invoke a certain emotion or sexy feeling. its difficult to explain but i try my hardest to use “beautiful language” paired with dirty, disgusting, cacophonous language. marry them together so you can convey whether youre “love-making” or “fucking”. i dont like words that dont look or sound good in my head. like when you paint, you probably use colors you like looking at to create the entire picture on the canvas that’s beautiful. so pick out paints that are pleasing to the eyes. the bold ones and the soft ones.

examples of words i dont use cos i hate the way they sound and the way they look: “vagina” and “penis” LMAO

even “butt” isnt a word i like to use. i’ll almost always use “ass” or “backside”

⟹ the smut writer’s dictionary

☥ i keep comedy out of it for the most part, ive never really seem humor added positively into a smut that added to the experience. its usually physical humor stuff like the characters bumping heads or stubbing their toe or something its just cringy to me idk. if i add comedy (i am not good at writing comedy)i put it before the smut. and if you must have some sort of lightheartedness id keep it casual, light, and personal. like an inside joke or something tongue in cheek. you dont have to hide your deepest desires behind humor , you can be serious

☥ your pain tolerance is heightened so run with that. get spanked its fun

more important tips i love and stand by:

☥ call backs are important to me. it’s like if you have something in the future of your fic to be used, try to incorporate it in some small way in your establishing settings or build up. but it’s not as important to others as it is to me. an example would be in my one shot “talk huttese to me”, at the end anakin fucks reader on the tool table. at the very beginning of the fic, when i had reader taking in the surroundings of the “garage bay”, she scanned the drawer stack where she set his broth she brought him, and the tool table he’d later fuck her on. its kinda like,,, foreshadowing (i think?). you’re setting up your reader to be like “?? i wonder why the author thought it would be important to mention the tool table.. wonder if anakin fucks her on it later.” but even if your readers dont react that way, i still think it ties things together nicely

☥ try to write 15-20 mins uninterrupted. create a ritual. i use the bathroom, refill my water, grab a fun drink like sweet tea, put on a silent youtube video (like my ahsoka star wars lofi live i love so much), listen to a playlist of music (preferably music you havent heard before so it can fade into the background. maybe even cultivate a playlist for the vibe youre going for in your story, aids greatly in creating an atmosphere in your writing if youre translating the music in your ears), and turn your phones notifications off (ofc i leave on notifs for calls in case of emergencies, but i can answer my friends’ texts after my writing session). set a timer so you dont have to keep checking the time.

☥ don’t stop in the middle of your storytelling to check the thesaurus or dictionary. write out whatever word/phrase first came to mind and highlight it to come back to later to alter or replace it completely. you’re interrupted your creative flow and its difficult to come back to it when youre checking the thesaurus every five seconds. this hack was crucial to my ability to stay on task i promise you

☥ avoid sounding repetitive by using the same words close together. you’ll create a fuller story by adding to your vocabulary using the thesaurus.

☥ avoid listing actions, break them up with adverbs at the start of your sentences if you must, or description of things or the place your character is in, or explain the emotion your character is feeling or what that emotion is causing within your character. starting sentences over and over again with the character’s name or pronoun breaks up the flow for the reader.

☥ really try to finish your works in progress even if you think its bad, the challenge of it will help you practice and learn to overcome your own mind trying to hold you back

☥ if you dont like the direction your fic is going,,, and youre experiencing writer’s block:: cross out the most recent bit and take it in a new direction. “oh but indy!! i really have a certain goal in mind!!” great, find another way to get to it because youre blocking yourself from finishing this forcing yourself into a non entertaining corner. switch it up! challenge yourself. “but indy!! i really liked what i had for this scene!!” yea but youre blocked right? youre not writing anything else for this scene and you cant, right? if you like what you have for this scene (an action, a dialogue piece youre proud of, a plot twist) save it! use it for a different piece !

hope this helps you and others!

[veryinnovative]

hi!

i have a quick pandemonium question. absolutely zero pressure to answer because i know a lot of authors (me included lmao) like to keep this secret to add to The Experience, but i was wondering — if you are comfortable — if you’d be willing to reveal whether or not jegulus is safe from the mcd tag? i saw the mcd accompanied by the “angst with a happy ending” tag and jegulus as the main pairing, and i know angst with a happy ending can mean different things to different people, so i was curious whether or not them staying alive/together contributed to it.

once again i wanna emphasize that there’s zero pressure on my end for you to answer, and i completely understand and respect your decision regardless. i just think pandemonium is such a fucking amazing concept (especially as a lover of trans regulus and trans mpreg rep!! and a fellow writer who wants to explore being trans in an apocalypse because WOW what would that entail), and following along with wips/theorizing about the unknown as a fic is being published is something i love so much about fandom, but i am in fact one of those wimps who can’t handle mcd unless it’s temporary.

i hope this doesn’t come off as demanding/pushy😭i truly don’t mean to sound rude or like i’m prying into your space, but if i’m overstepping a boundary please let me know. thank you so much!

hii!! ur fine nw :)) ! i actually answered this before but im so shit at tagging so no worries no pushy vibes at all <3

i dont feel like revealing who survives/who doesn't for the sake of immersion as u mentioned! the fun bit of zombie apocalypse/high stakes fics is the fact you're kept on your toes and truly worry for the character's wellbeing. i am, admittedly, still thinking about whether to add the tag regarding jegulus (or one of them maybe even) survives or not. and indeed, 'happy ending' is open to multiple interpretations so i might have to rephrase it as well........

yfwfdgsdgds its so difficult bc u want to be all mean and mysterious saying stuff like 'everyone can die. even ur fav. no one is safe so enjoy every chapter where ur fav chara is alive while it lasts' but at the same time from a reader's pov i would also really want to know if jeggy get to live happy after at the end...... deffo something i really have to firmly decide on when i publish the first chapter of the fic!

ALSO AAAAA! u should deffo explore being trans in the apocalypse!!!!! id love to read more apocalypse fics, especially those WITH trans characters so definitely! no pressure to write anything but if u ever do......tag me.. id eat that shit UPPP

[aria-ashryver]

getting to know you

thank you so much for the tag @peonierose ! 🌸💕

Last song: okay so... it was the Shinra Theme from the Final Fantasy VII remake lmao (My fiance and i were chatting about how the bad guys theme music always goes unnecessarily hard in FF games😅)

But if we go by Spotify, it's KEY - Killer

Favourite colour(s): Yellow! ✨💛but also all of them?

Currently watching: I just finished Russian Doll S2 and I'm halfway through (slowly) re-watching The Heirs

Last movie: i genuinely don't remember, i almost never watch movies. Oh wait! I saw Dungeons & Dragons: Honour Among Thieves when it came out bc I got a free ticket to an advanced screening

Currently reading: The Blade Itself by Joe Abercrombie, which I'm struggling to get into I'm not falling in love with the (all straight, cis, male) cast of characters. The prose is great though. I might re-read Nalini Singh's Guild Hunter series because woooo ladies with weapons!

Sweet/spicy/savoury: SWEET oh. my god. i have the biggest sweet tooth. Chemo also killed my spice tolerance (which was great!) and made me dislike the taste of jalapeños. Which is just rude.

Last thing I Googled: "timer" (I was working out, sorry that's really boring!)

The search before that was "brown classic honda civic" bc i wanted to ground myself in just how truly awful Cas's car is for a scene I'm writing in Starlight lmao. Wanna see? It's sad lol

Current obsessions: Dave the Diver! Its a cosy game thats kind of like Stardew Valley except you run a sushi bar and go diving for fish (and befriend dolphins and mermaids, its super cute!)

Currently working on: getting healthy again 💪💪💪 (and growing back my goddamn eyebrows lmao). I've got several writing projects on the go (several Starlight chapters, some Blades fics, my novel, a couple other ID fics). I'm also doing longsword training and trying to learn to draw?? I've following an introductory course on Youtube for a couple weeks, Day One was circles. That's it. Just draw circles. (Circles are hard 😭) My respect for fandom artists was already high, but it is SKYROCKETING rn god damn!?

Tagging a bunch of folks, no pressure to actually do this at all!! Just if you are bored and wanna do something fun 😊

@alleykatart @stars-are-within-me @zhoras-bitch @spooky-pooky-enby @icanmakewords @lilyoffandoms @cadybear420

[oh-cawsh]

9 people to get to know better

thanks for tagging me @ghostradiodylan !!

1. Three ships: Rylan my beloved they do no wrong. theyre the epitome of awkward bashful and honest gay summer teen romance with the perfect contrasting note of horrific life threatening monsters which is unsurpassable genre peak. and yeah ngl its pretty rare that i get behind a ship but two others i can think of are amity/luz from the owl house (but mostly in season 1 because they do cute anxious crushing stuff and after that they just kind of turn into supportive gf A and supportive gf B), and legosi/louis from beastars because how do you just gloss over neurotic homophobe slut ptsd theatre twink x weird brooding puritan loser freudian pervert and the fact that it does WORK too like hello

2. First ever ship: i wanna say gregg and angus from night in the woods?? i remember i was in that weird sexual orientation puberty where you literally know you're gay but it's not like a consciously meaningful part of your identity so i remember seeing them and thinking wow that's cool that they're boyfriends i guess idk. also i'm inexorably drawn to their existence for some reason and my lockscreen is them cuddling with the lazy morning light peeking through the curtains

3. Last song: My Kink is Karma - Chappell Roan, im a sucker for moody electronic pop and that album DELIVERS

4. Last film: i watched the first three movies in a pirates of the caribbean marathon with some friends which ngl after the first one feels like trying to suck sugar water out of a sock 😶 the last film i personally chose to watch was the 1976 Carrie! it was nice being able to watch it and appreciate it as an adult with an education and not a teen recluse going "yeah carrie you show those villain highschoolers what's what"

5. Currently (re)reading: Shakespeare's Twelfth Night! i have my old copy from highschool open next to me and the 2012 shakespeare's globe production up and i just sit and sift between watching and reading and analysing it, just like when i first learned it in class. i'm not really sure why i wanted to reread it again in the first place, but i find it kind of soothing to read older texts where the language and culture's a little ways off from its modern successors. i find it calming to kind of pull those stories back in a way we can understand with its old contexts and writing, and see more and more of that timeless human experience shine through. sudoku for english nerds i guess LOL

6. Currently watching: my watcher's stamina has actually gotten so shit im ngl like i actually haven't watched a show in months 😭😭😭 the last show i watched was bluey (which was pretty good! (and pretty indicative of the kind of attention span ive got these days 😂👌))

7. Currently consuming: this horrible like nutraloaf nightmare bowl i made because my appetite was really poor today and at 5 pm or so i was like ugh well id better eat something quick and dense if im not gonna have a proper meal so i insulted God and put together reheated smashed potato (in the microwave so they lost all their crunch and flavour) + dried roasted edamame beans + peanut butter + regular butter + cheddar + yoghurt + whole salted almonds in a bowl and had a slice of walnut fig cake as a side. that thing needed a censor bar like i was in the trenches trying to get that down im ngl. eating that meal took more energy out of me than what it gave back like i knew i made something unholy and then immediately paid for it like it was so frankenstein and his monster right there on that kitchen counter

8. Currently craving: literally anything after that like god damn 😭😭😭😭😭 otherwise ive been hankering for a good chana masala and naan combo cus there's literally never a day where i'll turn south asian cuisine down like aw man i shouldve just gone out and got some of that to eat today ugh god damn it

also im ngl i don't really know who to tag cus i only started having a presence on tumblr like barely a month ago and ive only meaningfully interacted with like 3 people since then so um!! whoever's out there lurking around on my blog if ya wanna participate feel free! and either way, thanks for readin my ramblings regardless :)

[charmanderxerneas]

gahhh i love sonic so much. what are yalls hopes and dreams for the third sonic movie? some of mine are unrealistic but here goes (from most to least realistic in my mind lol)

-i don’t want them to shy away from shadow’s backstory with maria, i hope they tackle it well and show that like. “hey the government fuckin murdered this little girl who was basically like a sister to him” because its so important to the themes of his story. I don’t want them to sugarcoat it or water it down. in fact: itd be cool to look at those themes with gun in the next movie: pointing out how the military can be evil at times!

-AMY! Wtf I can’t believe we haven’t gotten her yet considering she is the main girl character. I hope that they write her well too instead of just making her entire personality “girl who likes sonic” id prefer it if they didnt lean into that please it can be uncomfortable 😭

-Since we’re getting shadow i’d LOVE to see the rest of team dark: rouge and omega!

-remember those weird bird guys who had conflict with robotnik at the beginning of the second movie? I’d like to know what their dealio is. In my wildest dreams its some bizarre reference to the babylon rouges since they were three bird guys but i know im kidding myself with that: but regardless i wanna know what theyre about! who they are, motives, ect. I know they kinda showed a little in the comics but yeah.

-Idk if he would fit into the probably shadow central story in the next movie but um. I think metal sonic would be sick af but probably wont happen

-silver or blaze would be cool for a 4th movie or something but I don’t see them being shown at all in the next movie

and if you know me you saw this coming even tho it will likely never happen:

-They’re making a tv show specifically about movie knuckles. and. i was thinking: you know which team is associated with knuckles since in the classic 1995 game they were introduced alongside him and i would fuckfing kill to see th- yeah the chaotix. you probably expected that reading a post from the guy who made a 40 minute essay about them and concluded it with “i am starving for content of them i want them to be in more things”. but: for real they could be so funny interacting with knuckles imagine the contrast with how serious he is in the movie im not gonna fucking kid myself by mentioning mighty

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ari<33 how was your day? how is it going? tell me tell me!! MY QUESTION IS what movies would be your movies with gojo n geto n shoko?? like something you're both always down to watch

i just thought about this bc i put jackass on for background noise (a totally normal thing to do i know) and i realized that jackass would absolutely be something me n gojo would bond over lmao i think he'd find it so funny and he'd react to everything sooo dramatically like he's crawling backwards over the couch he's gagging he's crying he's laughing and he will most definitely wanna fucking try some of the stunts............................ he's stupid and i love him

- @softgirlgonehaywire

MICKEY !!!!!!!! hihihi!!!!!!!!! so happy to see u here hehe. my day was good!!! 🌻🌻🌻 im trying to take advantage of my uni break to read and write a bunch!!! which is super fun :D i wanna check out more of ur stuff sometime soon too !!!!

what abt u mickey?? did u do anything fun??? i hope ur day was (or is!!) super duper lovely <33

AAAA AND. thats the cutest question ever im losing it im biting at the walls tysm for indulging my sashisu obsession….. this got long u have been warned ‼️

FIRST OF ALL i just wanna say i havent watched jackass so i cant comment as much as i want to 😔😔😔 bUT i trust u and agree w everything u say yep yep !!!! AND i 100% agree that gojo would do movie stunts w u THATS SO CUTE 😭😭 he would do the most complicated dangerous stunt just to impress u <333 and then break his ankle. and force u to nurse him back to health it was on purpose :/

ahhh but!!!! honestly mickey i dont watch as many movies as id like to……. (PLS GIVE ME RECS 🙏🙏🙏) i have some faves and genres that i love tho!! so here r just some general thoughts :3

gojo is canonically down to watch basically anything so i feel like we would hunt down the most awful/low quality/unintentionally hilarious movies we can n just lose it laughing. ALSO…. im not super into reality tv but i think gojo would LOVE that shit. obsessed w it. i would watch his silly little reality tv shows just to make him happy <333 i feel like he would have genuine beef w people on the show too PHDKDJD LIKE DAMN IS IT REALLY THAT SERIOUS… but it is. he’s out for blood.

….. also this is me being self indulgent lets be clear but: some part of me thinks gojo would love musicals <33 its the would-be theatre kid in him. i love and cherish the legally blonde musical and i know he would too. he sings along obnoxiously loud which would be super funny if he was tone deaf but sadly he has a beautiful voice LMAOO

NOW as for shoko …… she loves horror movies. loves them loves them. i think she’d actually prefer really bad horror movies though. bc she thinks the over-the-top effects are so funny… either way im suffering bc im a scaredy cat LOL. but i feel like she’d like that too <33 (i would cry and she would comfort me by explaining how splattered brains ACTUALLY look and that would make me cry more)

AH ALSO … i have literally no idea where this came from and its not a movie but!! i think shoko would be unreasonably obsessed w the office. its her hyperfixation. we would binge it together all the time <33 my favorite is michael but she would compare him to gojo (objectively correct comparison) and i would no longer be able to see him the same way

and then for sugu…….. he’s so pretentious mickey. i just know he is. ONLY watches good movies. if u ask nicely he’ll watch a bad movie w u but will silently judge it + ur taste the whole time i hate him. (i dont.) idk i just feel like he has way too much to say abt fight club and the godfather PSBDJBF TELL ME U SEE THE VISION…. will lowkey mainsplain them to u but its sugu so i think its fine <33

but jokes aside i think sugu just has Good taste. beyond the mainstream toxic man movies (and even w those i think he has genuinely good and interesting takes he’s simply Perfect)… i feel like he has a wide selection of lesser known movies that are actually really really good and he shares them w u <3 and gatekeeps them from everyone else im thinking like old monochrome french movies w really interesting plots …. indie gems …. etc etc.

but as i said im not knowledgeable abt movies at ALL so i think id just have to trust his taste n watch them w him 😭😭 i cant decide if he’s the type to pause the movie every two minutes to explain something or give u side eye if u talk while its playing PDBDJDJ EITHER WAY… i love him.

OH BUT BUT BUT …. i think sugu would love mystery movies a lot!!! and they r my favorites ever ever ever. i love knives out & the 2009 sherlock holmes movies so i would force him to watch them w me. thankfully theyre super good so we’d both be happy :) yeah.

if u pay attention while reading u can tell the exact moment i started getting carried away i think PDBDJD THIS WAS SUCH A GOOD QUESTION MICKEY ….. so fun to think abt. if u have any more thoughts on what u and gojo would watch PLS tell me i am itching to know 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[taegularities]

Rid you're crazyyyyyyyyyyy

just finished cmi11 IM FUCKING CRYING holy shit that was so good oh god

first of all the conversation between oc and her mom made me cry so hard- it hit home for me, as a girlie with mommy issues, that part felt so real to me. Oc's courage to stand up for herself like that and tell her how much she hurt her own daughter is something i dont have in me. It broke my fucking heart, that yearning feeling, i cant believe you put that specific feeling into words rid [are u part of the mommy issues community as well🧐 or are u just that amazing, a true fucking artist (i saw that anon calling you the beyonce of ff and i agree 100%)] idk how to describe my feelings rn, that part definitely left a mark in my heart, ill never forget it

second the domesticity in these two dorks oh my goddddd they're driving me crazy, theyre so cute and in love and im in love with them and i want to cry bc i want what they have but bc irl men suck the hopeless romantic in me is gonna have to live through fanfics for the rest of my life and that makes me fucking miserable but bless the fanfic gods like you that keep my soul alive, idk what id do without you

lastly that scareeeeee oh god like i knew itd be a negative but it had my heart beating out of my ass (idk if thats a phrase) but the way they handled it oh god, the emotionsssssss the fears and insecurities, just reminded me that theyre human, even if theyre the most fucking adorable characters ever, theyre still human and i loved seeing such nuance. You really are doing an amazing job rid, not only writing the story, scenes and dialogue, but also the way you write these characters in such depth, its so fucking refreshing to see.

i want to kiss your beatiful head that holds your beautiful brain, seriously ive never ever been so enchanted by a piece of writing before (and i read so much fanfiction its like an addiction) you are by far my strongest fix. For real tho, your writing, and particularly cmi has touched me deeply and I'll never ever forget it. So thank you

Rest assured and stop doubting yourself bc youre seriously incredible and so fucking talented. Now rest up and take care of yourself, i imagine its not easy to birth such work (i mean 36k you monster, i loved every second of it but damn girl take a break before you burn your brain out) but no srsly i hope youre eating well, sleeping well and doing things that make you happy and relaxed. You deserve all the best of this world rid🫂🩷

sincerely ~ 🐼✒️anon

panda hi hello oh my gosh, sorry for being late, but you mentioned so many important things, so i wanted to take my time HELLO!! never stop sending these lovely af reviews 🥺

i know... she really is inspiring bc the courage to stand up against someone you feared for so long is admirable. i'm part of both the mommy and daddy issues community even though it's gotten a lot better lol like i wonder why it's such a recurring theme in my fics 🤣 i'm so sorry you could relate to oc :( but i'm glad you liked the scene so much.

and ahhh the domesticity 🤧 it's been so so fun and relaxing to write!! real life romance can be hard to find, yeah :') so i guess writing these scenes and chapters has been extra cathartic (although it drives me crazy, too — the next chapter has been making me so jejfhdjjsgd), but here's to finding a cmi jk irl soon :') much more to come!!!🕯️

the scare was one hell of a ride 🥺 i cried a lot!! and even i have been realising lately that i sometimes try to make my characters flawless, but that's actually not what i wanna go for. i always snap out of it and then try to make them flawed bc they're human, and i think the cmi couple, despite how endearing they are, is definitely vv flawed :') thank you for pointing that out 🥺

your strongest fix?? girl PLEASE ILL CRY 😭💔 i love you so much, you're so sweet for saying that and seeing me in such a way, pls i want you here forever <3 i rested a lot after cmi11! but ngl, cmi11.5 almost burned me out ksjdhehd gonna rest even more after that hehe. tyssssm, i hope you're well and healthy and i appreciate you so much for your kindness, reassurances and love for this series/me. love you so much 🤍

[rafeandonlyrafe]

I have a question...

do you maybe have tips for writing? cuz I wanna start writing fics SO BAD. but I feel like I'm so bad at it and I don't understand all of the things like blurbs and prompts and all those different things😭

I'd really appreciate it bc ur writing is like the best EVER. 🫶

maybe this stems from me being a creative person in general but the #1 way i get fic ideas is DAYDREAMS i love to daydream and create scenarios and so 90% of my fics are just writing those scenarios out but with reader/y/n inserted instead of it being myself

i also am not the biggest fan of searching for prompts, instead i also get ideas from reading the description of fics or like the first couple paragraphs then jump off and kind of rewrite it/come up with my own ideas for the general thing that i saw posted that i like

i have SO many fics that never got posted from when i first started writing. i think the best thing you can do is make it something for yourself first. you have to enjoy the process of writing before you can enjoy publishing your fics. honestly, its not the best for some people. i think everyone can put in the work to write good fics but not everyone will genuinely enjoy writing.

i for one am very motivated by praise (reblogs/replies are literal crack to me) so i do enjoy publishing my fics but if i never could and only i would read them, i would still write!

another idea is to take a fic you already like but havent read in a while and rewrite what you can remember. obviously this is just an exercise and not something to publish, but just to work on using your words. i have a lot of phrases that i use in multiple fics because it stood out in another authors work or i wrote it once and really liked it

last tip is for a character like rafe especially is to just not worry about canon. that goes to the plot of the fic and the characters personality. my fics are mostly set just in general outer banks world, not specifically during a time from the show because that gets too complicated

let me know if you have any other questions!! id be so happy to talk more because i LOVE writing so so much

[osaemu]

life update under the cut bc this is a blog and people talk about their lives on their blogs!

omg okay so its only wednesday but I SWEAR ITS BEEN A WEEK SINCE THE WEEKEND. i have a five-slide presentation due at midnight that i havent started ((its 7:30 pm here)) and math homework due tmrw and im procrastinating bc i dont wanna do them 😭😭

ummm i have to make my queue post and then my mutuals post sometime soon. maybe ill do a selfship one too when my comms are done!! comms meaning art comms from other people but im writing in exchange so i have to do those too. maybe ill open writing comms for money whenever i set up paypal or something idk

kinda sucks that we finally got topless gojo but not the way we wanted it LMFAO,, sorry gojo nation. i would be devastated but dazai my number one pookie bear had the best day ever today so..... womp womp. also chuuya was so cute n silly in todays episode so i just cant bring myself to be sad rn lol

i think its funny how i stay up until 2 am most nights willingly and i dont drink coffee or energy drinks at all. im just built different!!

oohhhh i wanna talk about my irl friends rn. so irl whose codename is gonna be link on here is super cute n silly, she also writes fanfic but not nearly as often as i do. shes an ao3 girlie and shes super into zelda and thinks i write too much lmao which is probably true.

codename elsa is literally gorgeous. perfect breathtaking amazing in every way possible. shes a year older than me and i love her sm!! she thinks dazais very skinny which is true but...... hes my bf (real) (not clickbait)

codename jeanmarco is three years older than me and goes to berkeley :D theyre super fun to talk to and i cant wait for them to come back n visit!! i told them about the bsd and jjk updates today (theyre mostly involved in the aot fandom) and they said they were happy dazai survived bc otherwise i wouldve gone insane :3

honorable mentions: codename cat who got me into jjk (my old crush) left me on delivered for a whole month LMFAO, if it was anyone else they would be blocked but he leaves everyone on delivered so. im trying not to take it personally bc hes sweet but very bad at person-ing edit: he liked my spam post right after i posted this wow i manifested that so hard yall

also codename partay! keeps saying that if i were an animal id be a cat. idk why, i was whistling the other day bc i love whistling and she was like "hannah if you were an animal you'd be a cat".

EVERYONE ON MY SPAM TODAY SAID I LOOKED LIKE RAISIN BREAD TODAY. HOW DO I LOOK LIKE RAISIN BREAD.

anyways thanks for reading my life update ima do these more often now lmao!

[pepprs]

dont worry abt responding to my messages!! they can be little trinkets for u to keep forever if u wanna :)))

dear anon… how could i not respond to THESE!!!!!!!!!! 😭💗💗💗💗💗💗💗 you are the sweetest kindest most WONDERFUL soul. it is an honor to receive these beautiful letters and i hope you know how much i cherish each and every one. not just the words but the adventures you take me on and write up for the two of us!!! and the beauty and magic you help me to see in the world around me and the peace and love and love and love you conjure for me in moments when i cant find it or feel it so easy!!!! like idk i know i have no idea who you are outside of being dear anon and i only answer asks once in a blue moon but it truly means the world to me. TRULY.

your writing feels like all the best things, all the things i love most. like leaf piles in the fall and the pikmin bloom soundtrack (btw if you dont play that already i HIGHLY recommend it to you specifically, i think u would really like it and tbh you sending me these letters has the same vibe as my pikmin bringing me postcards from their adventures :"~DDDD!!! if you ever do join it please lmk i would LOVE to be friends and send you postcards and do adventures together!!!!) and frosting on cupcakes and twinkly dust motes in the sunlight and cumulus clouds and dogwood flowers and the way things made of glass refract rainbows and SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT. and even that isnt cutting it. how magical it all is. like i wish i wasnt so exhausted so i could express it better but it truly is so... idk. NOSTALGIC! COZY! HOME!!!!!

so... in order to try to articulate it (and also show my thanks / return the favor / etc.), i am sending this letter along with a care package knitted with word and song and magic and light. enclosed please find:

wind chimes that sing like the sun hitting the lake (also i REALLY want to get a butterfly hair clip!!! i cant wear hair clips or anything else fancy in my hair bc of my mask headbands but id love to have one in case im ever able to wear it in the future 🥹)

a heart-shaped pebble from brighton, to add to your collection (btw i LOVE the part about how you lost them a long time ago but you love them so you remember what they look like. WAUGH. gut punch GUT PUNCH IN THE BEST WAY!!!!)

a mug for hot chocolate, so we can share some together when it gets cold again -- decorated with hand-painted stars in all colors!

a tiny needle to knit your sundust satchels -- like the kind youd find in pixie hollow or the tale of desperaux or something (also both things that have dear anon vibes to me and are also DEEPLY nostalgic for me!)

a recipe for starfait, with illustrations!! (also i LOVE that idea for a replacement for "tesscore"!! but i may end up using that for my personal tag on my undertale / deltarune blog instead bc its so perfect (and also im HONORED that u associate that with me 😭😭😭😭))

a crown and wand for you to wear to match the fairy queen mouse while you write the same kind of magic and comfort she brings!

a packet of magical flower seeds that sprout the most whimsical sweet-smelling flowers, with petals that are soft to the touch!

a hand-woven scarf in your favorite color threaded with shiny silver strands, like comets streaming through the sky (also i am SO late to say this but UNO REVERSE CARD re: your new years wish to me which is genuinely making me lumpthroated and teary eyed reading it again in AUGUST. you are the sweetest EVER. and also ive never played journey before but ive been interested in it for years!!! i'll have to check it out and/or watch a playthrough!)

a hummingbird sculpture on a long stick for you to plant in your garden among the flowers, to sing to them and to you! (also RE: your question about your vocal range -- it just means that you can cover a little over two octaves (the number after the letter is the octave it's in, and each octave is a span of c-d-e-f-g-a-b-c -- so your range starts at about halfway through the third octave and goes to halfway through the fifth!) i think your range is about the same as mine iirc so we can hum along with the hummingbird and all three follow each other's notes :"~D <3)

a golden acorn on a thread for you to wear as a necklace when we go to the bird tea party! (by the way, have you ever read the book ""until the last acorn "when the last acorn is found?" it's a BEAUTIFUL book and it made me cry reading it! i think you and the acorn people would get along very, very well!!)

a lantern made of jelly moonlight and silver foil stars (see: ilomilo chapter 4 :"~D) for you to carry on your walks through the dim nights (you can hang the stars in the sky, and they'll brighten the world and light at your touch!)

a copy of one of my favorite books of all time, "the ten thousand doors of january," which is so much about wedging cracks open into other worlds, and something i think you might like very much / resonate with too!!

a big, big hug.

dear anon: THANK YOU. for all these words and for being you. i dont know how i got so lucky to have you sending me these little trinkets but i will most CERTAINLY keep them forever. i hope you experience all the peace and love and love and love to infinity. may you always know and shine with the light you bring and the light you are.

[masterwords]

Hi Angela!! I loved the “id do it for you” and “look at that, you’re blushing,” that you wrote after my request, I just wanted to thank u sm because i loved it so MUCH AND I LOVE PEACHES SMMM. 

I was hoping you could do 3 “if you arent going to help yourself, i will,” and 4 “you look pale…” with Hotch being a stubborn bastard and refusing to do something for his convenience for the sake of bureaucracy or some stubborn useless reason - this could be sometime pre show (Haley won’t exist, I’m sorry) and Morgan would visibly see him wearing himself thin instead of taking it easy like the doctors said. 

With that being said, feel free disregard the paragraph above, as long as ur the one writing it I’ll eat it up at this point I just love everything u write sm 😭😭

-❤️‍🩹

OKAY, first of all? Thank you so much for all of your intensely kind words. I'm glad you liked that story! (And yeah, peaches are THE JAM. It was a love story for peaches, really.) And now for my groveling...I'm so sorry this took me so damn long to do. I wrote 3 different stories for this that just turned out like garbage, and I couldn't post them. And this has been sitting here so long, I feel awful. I hope that this story I finally landed on is good! (Probably not good enough for as long as I took to write it...did I say I'm sorry? I'm so sorry.)

2.8k words | Hotch/Morgan

**

“Your turn,” Hotch said, shifting the weight on his hip against the hard plastic chair. This is their second airport terminal in one day, and the layover just went from one hour to three. Outside the snow was just beginning to fall and he suspected they'd be put up in a nearby hotel for the night before long. The sky was painted an ominous blue gray and getting darker by the minute. Morgan sighed.

“I don't wanna play anymore. Nothing new to see. Know any other games?”

Hotch yawned and let his eyes drift shut. “I've heard napping is a fun game.” Morgan's laughter was subdued and tired, but he nodded in agreement. A nap did sound nice.

“Want me to keep watch? We can take turns.” Like they were two warriors on a quest, not two marooned FBI Agents in some podunk airport in the midwestern USA.

“Just give me fifteen minutes...” Hotch drawled and was asleep before Morgan even thought about replying. He'd been sort of off all day, Morgan thought, a few steps behind his usual snap. Probably just that they'd been on the road for two weeks now and every airport was starting to look the same, let alone every rented sedan with a trunk waiting for their bags and a long drive ahead of them. Sleeping in their own beds was beginning to sound like an actual luxury instead of just a desire.

Morgan read a book. Tried to, anyway. But his eyes were blurry and unfocused often enough that he wasn't getting much out of it, each time he turned the page he realized he'd only taken in about half of the words...if that. Hotch shifted on the row of chairs beside him and let out a soft snorting sound followed by a deep yawn but he never actually woke up. Morgan let him go longer than 15 minutes...he seemed like he needed it.

“Hey, sleeping beauty,” Morgan whispered well over an hour later, running his finger along the rim of Hotch's ear. He'd sort of lost himself in a daze watching the snow flurry outside of the windows, it was mesmerizing. Completely lost track of time and space. “We got ourselves a hotel voucher for the night. Let's go get some real shut eye, huh?”

It took them two days of delayed and canceled flights to make it to Idaho, where they would decide it was more worthwhile to rent an SUV and try to drive through the Pacific Northwest and its snowstorms than try to catch more flights between metro areas. They could drive through Washington and most of Oregon without trouble, stay in roadside motels, and be in California in a matter of days. A few dodgy mountain passes stood in their way, some road delays and scary slippery moments would make for good stories to tell Gideon when they returned but ultimately, it became a sort of adventure.

Until Hotch got sick in San Fransisco. Morgan noticed the first signs while they wandered along with all of the old folks on the cell block tour of Alcatraz. It was one of their very few days off, and of all things they could do during a two week trip across the country to conduct custodial interviews with talkative serial killers was tour a famous prison. Hotch rolled his eyes, but Morgan whined.

“You're only against it because you've already done it...” he lobbied, and Hotch had no argument after the obvious.

“Haven't we been inside enough prisons? This is the only day we have without a prison visit for the next six days...”

“One more won't hurt.” He said that in his best Sean Connery accent, and Hotch cringed at the attempt. Anyone who would humiliate themselves like that deserved a pass, so he bought them two tickets and they got on the ferry. That was when Morgan noticed him clearing his throat more than usual and massaging just beneath his jaw when he thought no one was looking.

Hotch cleared his throat as they stepped onto the island and winced at the sharp pain. “Did you want to see this place because of its value historically or because of the movie?” Morgan only smiled and shrugged. That was answer enough. Hotch didn't complain the rest of the day, he did his best to enjoy the tour through the look of bliss on Morgan's face.

In the hotel room that night, Morgan noticed Hotch behaving a little off. He'd thought about the airport terminal, and he'd bounced back from that after a good night's sleep. He was a little off while they were at Alcatraz but he couldn't have really said how off, he was a little distracted.

Still, he wasn't too bad, so they ordered room service with their combined per diem and fell asleep full and content after watching “The Rock”. Morgan was pleased as punch.

Hotch woke in the morning with a fever. He knew he was sick right away. His eyes felt crusty and wet, his skin hot and his throat had pinpricks like tiny bonfires that he knew would spread rapidly. He winced as he swallowed the lukewarm water on his nightstand.

“You look pale,” Morgan said, stepping out of the shower just after he'd managed to pull himself upright. It had taken far longer than he'd anticipated and came with a lightheaded feeling he didn't care for. Hotch frowned and searched his foggy head for an appropriate response. He was sluggish, though, and the delay was obvious to Morgan.

“I'm always pale.” He avoided the question, and Morgan couldn't help but respect his tenacity even if it was frustrating. He wasn't going to let him have it, though.

“Yeah, true, but more than usual...are you sick? Should I take you to Urgent Care? You gonna pass out on me or something?”

“No.”

It was colder than intended, and Derek read it loud and clear. He'd press again in a bit but Hotch was figuring it out for himself right now and he could respect that.

“I'm sorry,” Hotch muttered, resting his cheek against the cool wood of the headboard. “I don't know if I'm sick or just...”

“Worn out? Stressed? Yeah, this travel shit is rough. But you look pretty bad.”

In the end, he decided he didn't have time to be sick, so he allowed Morgan to talk him into the Urgent Care. Just a precaution, if it was something serious they could catch it right away, and if not...well at least they knew. They could medicate it with DayQuil or AlkaSeltzer or something and he'd just have to walk through it.

But it was never that simple.

He had strep throat. He wasn't willing to miss their custodial interview, though, so he spent the day preparing in the hotel room while Morgan explored the city with what little free time they had. Hotch reasoned that Morgan should spend as little time with him in close quarters as possible so long as he wasn't showing symptoms and while that sounded absolutely absurd, he knew better than to argue with Hotch when he was sick. He was more like a porcupine than a puppy. When they showed up for the interview, Hotch could barely talk but he was still unwilling to let Morgan do it alone.

“Stay in the car.”

“No.” Hotch's voice barely worked but that word came out loud and clear.

“You think I can't talk to an inmate?”

“No,” Hotch whispered this time, even though he'd been told not to. No whispering, talk at full volume or not at all. Whispering felt better and he never had been good at following directions. “You're good at interrogation but this isn't an interrogation...we have to gain their trust and make them want to talk. They're not confessing, they've been sentenced, they're giving us a gift.”

“A gift!” Morgan scoffed but Hotch narrowed his eyes and nodded.

“A gift. They don't have to talk to us. They're essentially teaching us how to catch them...”

They left their credentials and their firearms with the guard and walked in, Hotch letting Morgan lead the way. This was technically his interview today, Hotch's intention had been to take the backseat and just observe. Like a trial run, one of many. He couldn't count how many of these he gave with Gideon or Rossi sitting behind him watching his every move. He'd been so nervous at first, but once he got over that on-stage feeling it became natural.

Except he was on enough cold meds to kill a horse just to stay upright and it didn't help. He was nearly asleep sitting up.

“Am I boring you, Agent?” Hopper, the inmate, asked with a sneer. Morgan glanced at Hotch who jerked himself upright quickly and glared at the man in the prison blues. His arms were folded over his chest, eyes blinking slowly while he gathered his senses. Where he was, what he was doing, who he was talking to. His eyes flickered briefly, catching the tape recorder, and then Morgan's stunned features before he turned rather lackadaisically to Hopper. His sleepy eyes never changed.

“Yes,” he replied finally in his weak television static voice and Morgan couldn't help a little smile. “You're not a very compelling story teller and you're wasting our time.”

“Come a little closer and I'll show you how I tell stories...” Hopper growled, his meaty paws forming fists inside the cuffs on the table. Hotch didn't even flinch.

Instead, he stood, indicating for Morgan to do the same. “He's been lying to us for a half hour. I don't like having my time wasted. I don't feel very good and I'd rather be in bed.”

Hopper, the sudden realization of what he would lose if those two agents walked out the door, looked like he was choking on his tongue while he formulated a response.

Hotch continued in his flimsy painful whisper. “Whatever deal was made with you in return for the information you were willing to share is now void.”

“No, no wait! I'll tell you the truth! I swear!”

Hotch waved Morgan through the door now held open by a guard. Morgan couldn't believe Hotch ended the interview so abruptly, couldn't believe he'd picked up the guy lying even while he was sitting there with his eyes closed. Morgan had looked, thought Hotch really was asleep but he wasn't going to say anything. It all sounded so close to the file they had, so close to the trial transcripts he wasn't even sure where the lies were until later when he listened to the tape and made a comparison. The differences were stunning in their simplicity, and he wasn't sure if Hopper was lying on purpose or if he truly couldn't remember.

“How'd you know?”

Hotch shrugged, leaning his seat back in the car. He looked drained. Utterly miserable. “You get a sense for them after a while. Just like profiling a crime scene.” He couldn't explain it, except to say that it was why Morgan needed training time. It wasn't asking the questions, it was reading the answers. There were subtleties to these people, the way their minds worked.

“They lie a lot?” Morgan hadn't really given much thought to the motives of someone already in prison for life. Especially these guys who had already confessed to their crimes,they had no innocence to protect, they were just talking. Telling stories, like they were having biographies put in print. Hotch cleared his throat and frowned.

“Often. Depends on the deal they work out with the FBI to get us out there. Sometimes they just can't help themselves, the idea of having some kind of power over us is too enticing..” Hotch paused, letting out a wheezy cough into his elbow. “They like to feed us a line and see if we take it. If they can get us to publish their lies.”

“Fuck.”

Their schedule was packed, one after another. Each day was a presentation with a police station or two, followed by a custodial interview. Driving down the 101, motel sleeping, Hotch medicating himself beyond any reasonable amount just to stay upright and focused. It was really no wonder the travel had caught up to one of them.

“Let me do this one on my own,” Morgan said, sitting on the edge of the bed and yawning. It was only 3am, they still had hours before their wake up call, but it was time for another antibiotic dose and Hotch's fever wasn't showing any signs of improvement. That wasn't surprising since he hadn't rested one single time since finding out he had strep throat. It was almost like he was trying to outrun it. Out work it. Morgan handed him the pills, an antibiotic and two NyQuil with a glass of water.

“Derek,” he whined, glaring at the bright green medication even in the dark of the room. “I just want the Tylenol.”

“You're coughing instead of sleeping, man. Just take it. Otherwise we're both fucked tomorrow.”

Hotch considered it earnestly and finally let out a defeated sigh. “Fine. You'd better wake me up on time.”

“I can do it on my own, you should sleep. You're no good to us like this.”

“Wake me up.” He took the meds knowing that the NyQuil was going to knock him out and trusting that Morgan would wake him anyway. He might be a little tired during the interview but he'd be there, Morgan didn't need much more than that.

To no one's surprise, Hotch slept through the alarm and Morgan didn't bother to try and wake him. He finally looked peaceful and he wasn't going to bother him.

When Morgan returned triumphantly from the custodial, he found Hotch sitting upright on his bed looking furious. Pale, feverish, furious. Morgan thought he was pretty cute when he was sick and mad, with his sweaty hair matted to his forehead and the fever flush in his cheeks. Beside him, he had his phone, a bottle of water and a box of tissue.

“You said you'd wake me.”

“No, I never said I would.”

“We are a team, Derek. You don't have enough experience to do these interviews on your own, you're supposed to be training. Jason is going to have my head when he finds out you went in alone.”

“Man, you've been sick for three days. I've been doing them on my own the whole damn time. You practically slept through the one yesterday. That guy was pissed. If he hadn't been lying...Aaron, you got lucky.”

Hotch didn't have anything to say to that. It was true.

“If you won't help yourself, I will. That's all. I didn't mean to piss you off but you looked so damn miserable I just wanted you to sleep.”

Hotch had a litany of arguments he'd been muddling through about them being a team, but the look on Morgan's face was so apologetic that he couldn't. So he sulked instead. Just pulled out the big, pathetic watery eyes and Morgan almost fell into the bed with him to make that face go away. With some hot soup and the rest of the night listening to Morgan's interview (which, of course, was great) and watching movies, Morgan got his one wish. For Hotch to rest.

On their way to another custodial down the coast, Hotch wasn't feeling great but he was doing better. The fever had broken sometime over night, finally, and now he was left with a few days more of antibiotics and his throat on fire. Halfway to their destination, his pager went off. It was Gideon.

Morgan found a little diner and pulled over so Hotch could jump out and use the pay phone. They had a cell phone but they had no service out there overlooking the ocean on the highway.

“Jason, it's Hotch,” he said, forcing as much of his voice through his strained and painful vocal chords as he could muster. He would pay for it later.

“We have a bomber,” Gideon says gravely, taking no notice of Hotch's wobbly voice. “Get on the next plane to Boston. I need you both there immediately.”

Hotch returned to the vehicle with a shadow over his features, all the wind had been taken from his sails. Morgan leaned toward him, his arms folded over his chest and his hips resting against the hot hood of the SUV expectantly.

“What did mom say?”

“Looks like we're gonna have to stand up Bailey and Arlington, Gideon needs us in Boston.”