nakedmoleratqueen

[biogarfield]

so I might have mentioned this already but there's this one au I have and one thing thats definitely going to happen is Subspace gets jumped and gets his ass beat so bad where it would probably make more sense for him to die

but god damn i really want to keep him alive so he can rot more. I don't know how to make that make sense though but it would be cool I think

[ilys00ga]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍

pairing: yoongi x female reader.

synopsis: where you meet him during your best friend's wedding. can a heart beat again after breaking to pieces?

genre: best friend's brother!yoongi, actress!female reader, bookshop owner!yoongi, angst, kind of hurt/comfort, there's also some fluff, strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, first encounters.

warnings: cheating, heartbreak, slight mentions of depression, failed past relationship, smoking. this is pure fiction ⚠️ !!

A/N: sorry for any typos or mistakes. just enjoy, pls :)! also, I might write a second part for this one. idk, tho.

ᵎᵎ 𖦹彡⋆｡˚・ ─ ・ ⋯ ・ ─ ⊹ ♡₊˚๑

- incoming message: "saera <3: are you ditching at the last minute?"

the screen read.

oppening the door to the hall in which everyone was already sat, you made your way into the room as quietly and as quickly as possible. and with your eyes scanning around in an attempt to spot your usual group of friends, a wave of relief washed over you upon finally spotting them.

"finally! was almost certain you won't be showing up." your friend, saera, muttered under her breath and pulled you to sit closer by her side.

"why wouldn't I?" you scoffed at first, but continued with a more serious tone upon seeing the concerned look her face held, "I'm sorry, I... got distracted."

"distracted?" her brow rose in a stern question, before slowly shaking her head in defeat. "right. seriously though, if you feel like it's too much just say the word and we'll leave."

"no, I'll leave and you'll stay and have all the fun here. I won't let my messed up past ruin this for you too." you argued.

"hey-!"

"I'm fine, I promise. I wouldn't be here if I weren't. we need to drop this topic now." you took her hands in yours, looking into her eyes with a serious expression, and she silently nodded her head after a few seconds. you smiled at her in thanks before turning to greet Jimin and Jisung, your other friends from work who were sitting right behind the two of you.

"how are you boys doing?"

"I'd be better if it weren't for this ridiculous dress code we had to follow." Jisung pointed to the pink hat he was wearing with a frown. Soyoon, the bride and your dearest friend, had insisted on setting a dress code for all the guests. everyone had to wear anything as long as it's not black - "black is boring! this is a wedding! MY wedding!" - or crazy-colorful, along with a special piece - a pink hat or a pink hair clip. something pink, you do you.

no one understood this weird dress code, yet no one dared to complain, simply trying to style their options as best as they could. and in her defense, sweet, typical Soyoon said she wanted to play around and test her guests for fun.

"talking as if you wouldn't wear the most ridiculous looking outfits on random work days all in the name of fashion." jimin chimed in to tease the other whining man, making saera laugh. the room fell silent, and the ceremony began shortly after they started their usual bickering war of words.

in your honest opinion, Soyoon was a very gorgeous woman. she was always well presented and beautiful. however, as she stood before the crowd with her smile so big and radiant, she looked like a literal princess. you stared at your best friend in pure awe because you're genuinely happy for her. so, so happy. and you ignored the feeling that weighted down on your heart as your mind clung back to the day you wore your own white gown and your own veil, all to cherish this precious moment. to celebrate with your loved ones.

just like that, the vows were pronounced and the husband kissed his bride. cheers and claps filled the room, and everyone moved to congratulate the newly wedded lovers. yet the party is still very young.

you stood aside for a while, allowing yourself to drink in the beautiful sight of pure happiness and love, reminding yourself that the world is still moving even though you were busy being stuck in the past. you observed until the tornado that's been brewing in your chest grew violent before walking out of the scene, out and towards the small lake situated not far away from the building.

it's been exactly eight months and a couple of days since you've stood in front of your own wedding venue. eight-going-nine months since you got your heart broken.

maybe you were just a coward, too scared to face your own emotions, but it's not like you chose not to attend one all this time. you just couldn't. no matter how hard you tried to overcome the pain, the wound was still so fresh, and it only seemed to be getting bigger than you, swallowing you alive.

the pain of seeing the person you were so bewitched by, to whom you were ready to spend the rest of your life being committed, the one you loved with your entire heart inside some random room in the same venue the two of you chose to finally celebrate your love, all pressed up against the wall with another woman. kissing and doing things you decided not to even attempt to think about or recall.

at the time, it took you a good five minutes to get yourself together, to look closely to confirm that what you saw was indeed real and not just some messed up image your pre-wedding anxiety was trying to print into your brain, before sprinting out of the building and running far, far away from everything. running despite your legs feeling like they could explode at any given moment. you ran until you reached an empty unknown, crouching down and spilling your heart through your eyes and across your cold cheeks as you cried and cried and cried with the wind slapping against your skin.

from then on, you could never attend a wedding. no matter who the loved one was to you, you just couldn't bring yourself to do it. all you could do was smile apologetically as you politely rejected their invitation. and they understood because they knew.

eight months and there you were. numb body sitting on a bench, with a little cigarette between a thumb and an index, pulling and exhaling every now and then as you let the calm of the lake and the green of the grass, along with the color of the flowers do their favorite game of soothing your heart.

part of you wished you were the smoke that rose and flourished in the sky, giving its weight and color up to become one with the wind.

"not a fan of parties too?" a voice that sounded concerned, but very timid and gentle, broke the silence. almost like it was too ashamed of announcing its own presence. and if its deepness startled you, you didn't let it show. Instead, you lifted your head and saw a man standing close by, with his hands tucked into the pockets of his dark blue trousers and head tilted slightly in question.

"mind if i join you?" the sight of him scratching the nape of his neck with an awkward smile triggered your own smile, but you really weren't in the mood, so you wordlessly nodded towards the empty spot next to you and he didn't comment on that.

"it's more about the event itself rather than the crowd." you took a cigarette out of your purse and extended it to the pale skinned man.

"well, then we're not as similar as I assumed. and for that, I apologize." he mused, accepting your offer with a smile. you watch as he put it between his lips and leaned in towards the lighter you held out for him. "thanks" he nodded, taking a long pull and sighing as he breathed out and goaned in satisfaction.

you didn't know what to say, how to lay it out to him. in fact, you weren't even sure if you should let him know. after all, he was a stranger that you've never seen before. but your heart squeezed with a sudden need to talk, to explain why and how you were so messed up, while your brains insisted no.

you shook your head with a sigh, trying to think of something to say when the man caught you off guard with a question, "do you like playing UNO?"

snapping your head towaards him, you saw him holding a box of UNO cards, waving it slightly and proudly showing it off to you with a smile, and you couldn't help but giggle at that.

"why did you carry UNO cards with you to a wedding?" he chuckled with a shrug before sheepishly admitting that he bought it as a gift for his little niece.

"do you want to play, yes or no?" he smirked and narrowed his eyes in a teasing manner.

"gosh. open it already."

he does as he's told, scooting a little farther than you to make a little space in which the two of you started playing the silly little game.

"how do you know Soyoon?" the man wondered aloud.

"she's my best friend slash co-worker. what about you?"

"her brother, yoongi." he simply answered. you knew Soyoon had a brother before, but you never got to meet or even ask about him.

"it's an honor to finally meet you, then. I'm ___."

"i know you, soyoon talked about you and a couple of other friends before." yoongi smiled shyly, everting his eyes to focus back on the game.

"you seem pretty good at this, wasn't expecting that, to be honest." yoongi hummed at your teasing comment, picking a card, a plus two card, when it was his turn and putting it atop the pilled up ones in the middle. "glad you're having fun. I was afraid you would stick to your frown for the rest of the ceremony and never show us your cute smile."

heat rushed through your face, tinting your cheeks as his words, along with his slick move and the smirk on his face settle in your head.

"you didn't seem happy." he explained further, locking his eyes with yours, and you cleared your throat in an attempt to brush your brush off and continued to play.

"I don't really fancy weddings." you said.

"understandable. I don't fancy parties and public places either."

"yeah, but your circumstances are probably very different from mine."

he snorts "social anxiety is social anxiety."

"did you get your heart broken from an ex fiancé, soon-to-be husband like i did?" you failed to fight the bite in your tone, and your face hardened for a moment before softening again when he didn't respond with anything.

"sorry about that." you apologized.

"it's fine." he smiled.

your little bubble was popped open when a feminine voice called out your name, saera was waving for you to come over. you let out a small "oh" and faced yoongi who scrunched his nose in response, "guess the game's over." he stood up and offered his hand for you.

"for now," you noted, taking his hand and standing up as well, "we still didn't see who's the winner."

for a brief moment, you looked down at the cards you were still holding in your other hand, and then met his eyes again, "it was a lovely game can't wait to see again and beat you at last."

you could feel your hands shaking slightly, hesitating before extending a reverse card towards him with a shy smile. yoongi stared dumbfoundedly at first, then took the card with an equally shy smile.

"I'll be eagerly waiting, then."

you two started towards the building, with you taking rushed steps thanks to the way saera's been signaling for you to hurry up! and you didn't miss her little smirk when you finally reached her, nor the way she discreetly tilted her head towards the other man who was still a few steps far behind.

"I've seen a lot, but playing card games as a first interaction in a ceremony is quite new to me." she linked her arm with yours and guided you towards the main hall, where everyone was still chatting and enjoying their time.

"the party's ending, let's go say bye to the bride!" you ignored her comment with a cheer.

"my girls!" soyoon greeted with her arms open wide for the two of you.

"our beautiful, beautiful bride!" and saera cheered just with an equal amount of joy.

the bride pulled away to look at you with a grateful smile, "thank you so much for being here."

"oh please, did you expect me to really ditch your special day because of some stupid past drama?!" you scoffed.

"I know how hard it's been for you, my dear. I'm so glad you're here."

"it's really nothing." you insist.

"yeah, she was having fun with your brother out there, don't worry about her." saera winked with a mischievous smile, which pulled a gasp from soyoon, startled.

"wait what?!"

"oh my god. stop, you two. we just talked a little bit. I've never got to meet him before." you whined.

"neither did I!" saera fired back.

"well, I'm not gonna lie, you two are a good material." soyoon smirked and giggled with saera. both of them always loved to tease you.

"I'm leaving!"

"don't forget, we're having a sleepover this weekend!" you roll your eyes at saera before bidding you goodbye, hugging the girls one last time and leaving with a weirdly much lighter heart.

[kichiyosh1]

He takes advantage of your feelings for him

modern au!scaramouche x reader

Ain't it nice when your crush is aware you have a crush on him and instead of being a prick and outright rejecting you he leads you on instead☺

warnings: it's in the title, good ending

༒༆࿐ཽ༵☆

It all started when he overheard one of your friends teasing you for taking a liking to him, which you were doing a horrible job at denying, with how quickly you stuttered out your words in protest. He might use this to his advantage, get you to do a couple of stuff for him and tease you a little bit in the process. Of course, he doesn't plan to return your feelings, pfft, no way in Celestia is that ever gonna happen. Totally no way would he actually start to appreciate you for something as minor as that.

How fortunate unfortunate of you to be his target out of the many others that also liked him, but why did he choose you? convenience? your naivety? who knows.

He wanted to test how far this crush of yours on him was, so the next morning he put his plan into action.

He never actually greets anyone he passes by, usually hanging around outside the school before the bell rings or just having his arms folded on his desk while he dozzes off, but today he put in the effort to say good morning to you before he rounded a corner.

Quickly doing a 180° turn right after to see your reaction, and low and behold you had your back to the wall, slowly sliding down, face in your hands.

Oh, so you really had it that bad for him, huh.

He was playing a dangerous game here, one that he was determined to win, and one he knew he would thoroughly enjoy.

Moves he'd make on you were subtle, but to you, from what he thinks, should be more than just subtle interactions, but meaningful ones.

He'd intentionally lean down right beside your ear, talking in a sweet voice as he pretends to ask questions while pointing at the notes he's seen you write down.

He knows the effect he has on you, can see how your hands struggle to hold your pen while your voice slowly becomes meeker as you explain the answer.

"Cute"

He didn't even realize what he said until he saw your hand stop moving. Luckily, everything still went into his favor when you abruptly stood up and quickly explained you had something to discuss with your friend, but he could clearly see how flustered you were.

He let's out a sigh of relief. 'It's alright, I meant to do that, just trying to butter up that idiot for the next step in my plan, yeah'

Something of uneasiness steers within him, but he ignores it.

These were just feelings of interest he's PRETENDING to have for you in order to gain your trust, nothing more and nothing less. It's all an act to get you to do stuff for him

But he has yet to realize the fast pace of his heart was the same as yours

Most of his assignments were already complete thanks to you, projects and reports he's forgotten to do, you are currently dealing with them.

It baffles him how easy and gullible you are

The guilt nips at his feet, but he strengthens his resolve saying you would have fallen for somebody else, and they would have done way worse things to you. (he gets a little agitated thinking about it, whether they'd use you for their own benefit or return your feelings, it makes him sick)

guilt tripping you didn't make it easier either

he wonders if you are aware of what he's doing, and even if you were then that's alright with him.

He'll keep this up, for as long as your heart continues to beat for him.

Its really short.

was gonna write a nsfw route but idk if i should since I'm really tired😪

[cruyuu]

Hey have you seen that one managa panel in the latest leaks where its sukuna just gently graeping yuuji's head as he just beats the shit outta him?

Theres a post on tumblr where it has it and like a powerscaler from twitter basically saying "is sukuna really tryna fuck up yuuji bc i would have personally sunken my nails into his skull" and uh... yeah the person has a point. Sukuna really is just gently holding Yuuji's head.

Like his actions seem both brutal yet... protective? For a man who 'hates' Yuuji he sure as hell is giving mixed signals during his fight against him.

I did, anon! The "holding gently" and "beating the shit out of" being in a single sentence together tho lmfao.

I'm glad people are starting to notice that these two are not just fighting because that is true. If they were truly fighting, the fight would've ended a long time ago and would've been way, way more serious than whatever this is. Atp, I don't even know what the hell they are doing. They're groping each other more so than causing any real damage, like I'm genuinely tired of them lmfao.

Ever since the start of this arc, we've got Sukuna gripping his waist and holding him like they're dancing (?), Yuuji clinging onto his arm like a koala, Sukuna smiling as he hugs him closer to his face and Dismantles him, Yuuji wrapping his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist and now... add the gentle head cradling as they throw punches at each other. Truly the fight of all time, isn't it? Just a bit of jujutsu (ft. a Domain Expansion not for ripping away Sukuna's soul but... talking with him and spending a day with him?) a lot of unnecessary touching (and gentleness), and hatred which is showcased by... gentle head holding?

Sure, Megumi is still in there so that explains why Yuuji would be holding back from damaging Sukuna too much and not tearing him limb from limb but still, that notion didn't stop him from nearly tearing his heart out in Chapter 260 nor does it explain why he wrapped his arms around his neck (like what was the purpose) so... yeah.

As for Sukuna... yeah, there's absolutely no way to explain his behavior at all.

With that hulking form which towers over Yuuji, you would think, since he hates him and wishes to see him gone (and especially since he knows Yuuji's punches are dangerous and need to be avoided), he'd be trying to put some distance between them. Like idk grab him by the leg and throw him away or just in general do something which is beneficial to him and act like Yuuji is as insignificant as he loves to yap that he is.

Well. Nope lmfao.

Somebody had said it is because they were one body before so they're unconsciously leaning into each other and cannot know of personal space and that headcanon is just a perfect way to explain this. They may "hate" each other but that longing to be close is winning the fight in this case. Isn't that sweet?

Like his actions seem both brutal yet... protective?

Ngl anon, Sukuna is brutal but this is as far away from his usual brutality as it can possibly be. Remember that this is a man whose CT is literally tearing something into shreds, who had cut a person in half, who had turned a literal teenager into little cubes for simply daring to attack him. That is Sukuna we were introduced to, the one who never gave a fuck about anyone and was pretty brutal. For him to be brutal now, he'd have to do something far worse than just throw a punch. Maybe finally start behaving like he feels? He claims he hates Yuuji and yet... doesn't fight him with visceral anger?

Ah... It's always something with these two lol. I'll miss them a lot.

[vante1920pm]

If you are so inclined I’d love to see a fic with aonung where reader is neteyam’s age and his bestie and like very much a big sis figure to the rest of the silly kids but particularly Lo’ak and she’s Omatikaya but comes with them to the metkayina for a reason and ends up liking Aonung but also fights with the boys to protect Kiri 🤷🏼‍♀️ idk

──;; 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇 𝐋𝐈𝐏𝐒 ★☆

★ 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲: I'm kinda disappointed with how it turned out but I hope you can still enjoy it :)

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

☆ 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: ao'nung/fem!omatikaya!reader

☆ 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: swearing, ooc, not proof read, short, violence

𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴: kill bill

"He asked if you're a freak, hah!"

────

"Hmm? Did you hear this, Neteyam?"

The boy just looked at you and shrugged his shoulders.

You were walking with Neteyam along the beach just to talk about stuff, like you always did.

That was when you spotted Kiri and these Metkayina boys talking, or more like forming a circle around her, as if they were trying to catch her.

Neteyam was distracted by something, so you just observed at first.

"Woah, Y/N, this fish looks just like you!"

You ignored Neteyams stupid teasing and didn't took your eyes away from the scene.

It seemed like they were picking on her, Lo'ak interrupting them right after. You heard them arguing so you tapped Neteyam on his shoulder, who, yet again, looked at you, confused. You pointed with your head towards their direction, to show him what you meant.

Neteyam immediately stood up and walked into their way, you following right behind him.

"Leave us alone!"

Neteyam grabbed Aonung by the shoulder and pushed him away. His smile dropped immediately and he just stared Neteyam down.

"You heard what she said. Leave them alone."

If you're being honest, he scared you a little but when he's like that.

"Ohh, big brother come-" Aonung stopped his friend mid-sentence, which made you curious now. Is he gonna challenge him?

Lo'ak stepped beside you, this action made Aonung look in your direction.

Neteyam stepped before you, in a way to shield you? You weren't sure but that's something that he did sometimes.

"Back off. Now!"

Aonung put his hands in a defensive and mocking way up, taking a few, small steps back.

"Let's go."

You all followed Neteyam, with Kiri sticking her tongue out to the boys and Lo'ak giving them one last glare.

Lo'ak came up to you again, putting his hand on your shoulder to guide you in front of him.

"Bye bye, heh!"

To this, Lo'ak turned around and headed right back to Aonung. Neteyam called his name with a warning tone but Lo'ak just assured him that it's fine.

Lo'ak put his hand in front of Aonungs face, who just smirked the whole time.

"But it can do something really cool, watch."

You held back your grin, knowing exactly what would happen next.

Without losing much time, Lo'ak already threw the older boy, with his fist, to the ground.

"It's called a punch, bitch!"

Aonung sat himself up before he threw himself on Lo'ak to make him fall down.

Now they all fought each other. 'sigh'

Neteyam now also joined the fight, punching and kicking the others.

Kiri made a comment about how stupid the fight was but couldn't contain her own laughter.

You chuckled and decided to also join the fight, that would be a great chance to finally beat the shit out of Aonung. He deserved it anyway.

So you grabbed his tail and pulled him back to you. He was perplexed and didn't move for a second, too surprised to fight back.

"Now you too, Y/N?" You heard Kiri say, who was still laughing her ass off.

You smiled at that and sat yourself over Aonung to punch him in his face a few times.

After every slap, you just smiled at him, but he didn't defend himself, which confused you a little bit.

You stopped to look at his face and to ask what his problem was and why he didn't fight against it, but he just stared back at you, with a grin on his face.

"What are you doing, fish lips? Fight back!".

He didn't reply but his gaze lingered on your lips for a few seconds, before he looked back into your eyes.

"Heh, you're not as weak as I thought.."

© 2022 VANTE_1920PM

[macsimagines]

Could I ask for Kisaki, Rindou, and Draken with partners that are insecure? Like they truly believe that their boyfriend/husband could do so much better than them

I've done this one already for Kisaki and Draken here but I can def do one for Rindou!! this is kind of like a part two to my EX! Ran Haitani headcanon set!! also idk why text colors are being weird i'll try to fix it later on

TW: YANDERE BEHAVIOR, MINORS DNI,

Yandere!Rindou Haitani

He loves you, adores you even. You're so soft and kind compared to his hard and mean. Rindou has always taken pride in being who he is. He's a Haitani brother, feared allover Tokyo and a ruler in charge of Roppongi.

But for you? Just you- He's Rin. Your loving boyfriend that is never too busy to spend time with you and never lacking in affection. He'll hold your hand gladly or throw a reassuring arm over your shoulder.

All the love in the world can't stop the thoughts in your head though. He's so much more than you'll ever be. You've seen him in action and his strength and overwhelming capabilities compared to your...to your anything just made you feel so dull in comparison.

Rin is beautiful, he catches the eye of every woman you walk past on the street. Rin is strong, he can beat men without breaking a sweat. Rin is powerful, he has people that flock to him at his beck and call and you are nothing.

"I just... I just think I'm holding you back," you tell him, over the phone because you're too much of coward to say it to his face, "I want... I want what's best for you-!" "What the fuck are you talkin' about, you're what's best for me! Baby-please-!" "I can't! I'm not enough, I'm sorry Rin."

And you hang up the phone, block his number. Its better this way, you're sure by this time next week he'll have moved onto someone else, someone better that could keep up with someone as amazing as him.

But then something unexpected happens. His brother comes looking for you. Rin warned you about him once, said that after a bad breakup with his girlfriend he hadn't been the same.

"I thought they got back together though?" you had asked him confused after he had told you. He never answered you back, just got this weird look on his face before giving you a warning; "Try not to get too close. And try not to piss him off."

Yet here he was, at your doorstep staring you down like you were the scum of the earth. Apparently you hadn't heeded the warning.

"Havin' fun?" he asks, not even blinking while he towers over you, and your voice is caught in your throat, too scared to even make a sound at the older Haitani. "Cause I'm sure fuckin' not."

And suddenly he's grabbing you by the hair so tight you're scared he's going to rip it from your skull, but no, he's dragging you out the door and down the steps of your apartment ignoring your cries and screams for help.

Muttering something the whole way to his car. Something like "...You bitches and the games you like to play. Fuck with our heads, you and my girl always got make fuckin' problems for us-"

Then he's shoving you into the passenger seat making sure you can't get out. One moment you feel like you've found your voice again and then the next it leaves you because Ran has a gun pointed right at you only seconds later.

"Your gonna fix this you ungrateful bitch," he spits, eyes so full of hate it makes you want to curl in on yourself, "Put my baby brother back together and act like you like it. Like you fuckin' love it. Or I'll kill you my damn self and make you regret makin' a fool out of the Haitanis. Do you understand, Y/N?"

You're not sure if you say yes or if you even or in affirmation before he's pulling out of the parking lot and speeding dangeroulsy to some unknown destination.

And you are crying, silently shaking and sobbing because you're so scared of what he's going to do and he's still holding the gun right at your head, muttering to himself yet again.

"I'll make it right- I'll fix him and he'll be ok- fuckin' women making us loose our goddamn minds-,"

Finally you pull into a warehouse, abandoned by the looks of it and new found fear arises in you- Is this where Ran is going to kill you? But no.... This is where Rin is.

You see him first, his eyes are dark and he looks so tired from his usual self, and his expression is so empty, so emotionless that you're worried for a split second but then you see...the man. At least that's what he used to be.

His face is beaten in, and his body is contorted in such a mangled way you're sure his limbs had been broken, and Rin is on top of him. Pummeling away at the already red and mangled face.

You can't help the small gasp that leaves you and you probably would've ran out there screaming had Ran not been holding you by the neck.

But your scream was enough to alert the younger Haitani, and he turns to look at you with eyes wild like an animals. "Y-Y/N?" he whispers standing on shaking legs, "B-baby is that you?"

It didn't matter how hard you tried you couldn't make out a single sound, too shocked by the scenes unfolding around you. Thankfully, Ran wasn't short on words....

"Ya, I brought Y/N here 'cause she has somethin' to say," Ran shoves you forward, making sure that the gun at his side is always within your view. A silent reminder of what he made you promise...

Rin doesn't let you get any words our before he's embracing you with bloodied hands, smearing another persons bodily fluid all over you... "Oh baby, please tell me you're back, please? Its been hell, I can't do this without you, I'm loosin' my fuckin' mind."

Its like your brain suddenly catches up with you. You have to say yes or else... "I-I'm back," you nod, hugging him back with shaking hands, "I'm... I'm sorry Rin."

And suddenly he's sobbing, pulling you away only so he could hold your face in his bloody hands to look into your eyes, "How could you do this to me, I love you so much,"

Ran once again, speaks. "You need to keep her in line," he tells his younger brother, much to your dismay, "Like I keep my girl. Don't worry. I'll teach you."

You could never leave Rin Haitani. Shame on you for even trying.

[riskyraiker]

Idk if tumblr removed my request from you or you decided to ignore it but anyways I'm going to request it again??

So I saw your post with xmen x tfp with a mutant reader, so I think you can do this request. Basically, reader is Charlie's younger sister from Hazbin Hotel and she is in a relationship with cons/bots. What would be Optimus and Soundwave (you can another character if you want) to their s/o being the Devil's daughter, is she actually evil as the myths portrayed? What is she doing here on Earth? There will be so many questions.

You can just ignore this if you want.

Oh I apologize, I saw the request, but I'm having trouble organizing school, freetime and writing. So here I wrote this now quickly but efficiently as possible😭😭I wanted to add Megatron and Ratchet to this aswell so I hope you don't mind!

Y/N Morningstar (Lucifer's daughter)

You were just minding your own business on earth since getting back to hell wouldn't be a problem. Hiding your s/o and their team from humanity was pretty challenging but boring since you're so used to go outside a lot or have something keeping you entertainted. These days only the best part was hanging out with your S/o You have told them about who you're related to, but they don't get human things like hell or heaven yet.

Optimus prime

He didn't understand at first that if you're the daughter of lucifer means that you're a powerful royal being.

He does search your name but only finds mythology about you which he thought wasn't true.

Telling him who you were with a long speech gave him time to process what or who you actually are.

He still loves you the same don't worry about that.

The moment he realizes the mythology he read about you was actually true was when you were furious. Megatron almost beated optimus in a fight.

You looked exactly like the pictures he found of the princess of hell.

He was happy that you weren't pure evil since you're from hell.

He did wonder why you were on earth as a royal demon. Whatever your explanation was, he was content with it.

WARM KISSES!!!!

If he anytime goes somewhere cold for a mission just please heat him up.

No PDA in public, but go around the corner and he's clinging to you

IF! IF your demon form is tall as him! hugs....just hugs.

As long as you're good and treat everyone with respect, you're the perfect couple of the eons.

Ratchet

Didn't believe one piece of scrap you spoke or what he found on the interent.

Once he sees you lose your temper and light things on fire on accident he thought he hasn't recharged enough.

Explain your situation to him and he's really confused.

Supports you anyway, he doesn't care if you're a rare being from hell etc.

he still wonder about one thing: you're from hell where everyone is bad, evil, done sins etc. how come you're so nice and such.

He might have had a spark attack when you changed into your demon form using fire.

His attitude might have changed to somewhat nicer. Definitely not because he doesn't want to get melted.

No PDA. NO! NOT ANYTHING WITH ANYONE AROUND. He likes loves privacy.

Small kisses and smooches if he's working with no one around will make him slightly happier.

Literal princess treatment :D

Warm him up PLEASE.

If your demon form is taller or as tall as him, he WILL be flustered after even one simple hug.

Doesn't question why you're on earth, gladly.

Megatron

Finds you interesting, but doesn't believe everything you say right away.

Asks Soundwave to find information about this thing called hell and it's beings.

Soundwave

You won him over the moment you lose your temper and the whole room is in flames.

If he finds out you might be more powerful than him he might get angry or jealous.

Asks can your dad (lucifer) to join the decepticons. (He ended up going to knockout for new three fingers)

Questions why are you on earth and not in hell ruling your realm.

He treats you with respect. You're a princess so expect some royal treatment!

He loves your demon form. It looks intimidating and strong.

Might give small PDA sometimes if he's in a good mood enough. Privately? He actually shows that he loves you :D

He's cold all the time! Warm him up and make him less angry thank you!

Wants to see how strong you actually are.

No words (no pun intended xD)

He didn't believe you at first ofc none of them did.

Finds your mythology quite interesting yet foolish until he discovers you're really a royalty from hell itself.

Confused why you're so sweet and nice yet being from hell; the place of sinners.

If he ever shows you a heart on his screen it has little devil horns on it like yours<3

He doesn't do PDA except head pats and taking you with him around the ship. Softie

If your demon form is tall or taller than him pick him up, he might struggle to focus on work again (megatron can do his own work for primus sake!)

Treats you the same, but is protective of you, doesn't care if you can take care of yourself.

If you miss your dad or hell. He gives you a smiley face on his screen and tell you to go visit your home!

-------------------–------------

AN: Motivation just punched me in the face :D hope you enjoy! Feel free to make anothe request<3 also if anyone here has read anything from me before thank you for the support! It keeps me going:)

[serpentsillusion]

*Mild language, sexual and suggestive content warning* 🤭⚠️ 🔞 a little humorous too. I live to make you all giggle a little.

The Silver Trio hanging around Hog's Head Alley and Sebastian apparently has a "soft item" kink...but he will never admit it, knowingly... MC is being her cheeky and feisty self (like always), and Ominis just puts up with both of them. MC is a veteran of their boyish games at this point and can joke around in a vulgar manner with absolutely no problem. (She was raised by her -wizard military- father mostly) one of the many things Seb absolutely adores about her. Her tough and cocky yet awkward and rather somewhat feminine side caught his eye in DATDA class when she royally served his ass in front of everyone.

✨🐍

Please let me know what you guys think! I literally just started writing, and I'm quickly realizing that I actually enjoy it! What do you want to read next? Do you want to see my MC? Ask me anything and give me a follow! I would very much appreciate the spirits and the support! 😁✨

Enjoy!

*Ominis, Sebastian and MC walking around, hanging out in the shady part of hogsmeade together*

MC: Why does it always smell like urine and ass, over here?

Sebastian: Maybe because it mostly is?? Do you ever think about that MC? No. You don't, because you only think about yourself.

MC: *is shooketh* How dare you... At least I don't beat my dick into a fuzzy blanket every night...

Sebastian: *gasps* HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?! Who told you? *Sebastian shoots a sharp glare straight through Ominis*

Ominis: HA!

MC: You're not denying it Seb.

Sebastian, (obviously lying): pfft..I don't USE a fuzzy blanket, I use my HAND, like a man... Ominis is lying to you.

Ominis: I never said a word.

MC: He's right... he didn't say anything Seb.

Sebastian: Argh! He didn't have to!! I can't go around telling all my secrets can I? And if I DO, I tell only one person. And that's Ominis.

MC: so no fuzzy blanket then?

Sebastian: OH MY MERLIN!! 💢

Ominis: Will you two just stop bickering like a married couple for two seconds and just kiss each other already!! Get it over with! I'm growing increasingly tired of having to listen to you two spat all the time!

*Sebastian and MC look at each other quickly and look back at Ominis shocked by his very statement.*

MC: You want me and Sebastian to kiss?! Right here? Right NOW?

Sebastian, (silently to himself): OMG. yus

Ominis: *stopping in his tracks* If it will get to guys to stop fighting all the time then yes. ALSO, MC! The blanket he "does" in fact "use" happens to be mine by the way. *he glares over to Sebastian's direction* It WAS a gift from my Aunt, until some freckled little rat stole it. It also used to be called "Mr. Fuzzy"...

MC: *snickering* Mr. Fuzzy.. kinky but okay. Glad to finally know Sebastian's got a Kink. ✨Heh heh.

Sebastian: Hey!! I'M NOT KINKY!

MC: *shoots finger guns at Seb* heh. Kinky. I knew it! *Finger gun noises* heh heh.

Sebastian, (trying to act cool): I'm not kinky, I'm pretty standard actually..😒

MC: standard huh? Is that what you call it? Well Damn! I honestly took you for a pretty "well rounded" type of guy 😏... Weird.

Sebastian: *realizing what he just said, and what MC is hinting at* OH! that's not what I meant!! M-Maybe I-I am well rou- Argh! Why are you being so cheeky MC? (Seb is getting flustered btw)

MC: I got it from my parents probably. Idk. *She shrugs*

Sebastian: Are your parents as difficult as you are?

MC: Nah. Worse..

Ominis: *turns, leans in, and whispers* Maybe if you actually told MC how you felt about her Sebastian, how you wanted it to be her, then it WOULD be HER you were "using" for your freaky little sexual fantasies.. instead of MY old blanket!

Sebastian: OH here we go again, Ominis.. I'm over here.

Ominis: wtf. 

MC: I heard all of that. 

Sebastian: What did he say?

Ominis: Merlin's beard! I can't help it if you guys stand so insufferably close together!!

MC: I'm not going to say a word to him about it Ominis. Lol

Ominis: shush MC

Sebastian: Why are you guys whispering? STOP TALKING ABOUT ME! 💢

*MC straightens herself and very quickly looks back and forth between Seb and Ominis not knowing what to say, she can feel her cheeks getting hot from the literal whole tea pot Ominis just dumped on his best friend*

MC: We we're uh talking about that cat over there. Also, *she starts panicking* I'm changing my name to Mr. Fuzzy.

Sebastian: wait what?

Ominis: What?

MC: what? 😳

MC, (to herself): why am I like this? 😭

Sebastian: Ominis can't even see, let alone a stray cat.. stop being sus MC. What about Mr. Fuzzy?...Btw that's a really dumb name for a blanket Ominis.

Ominis: Rude.

*Splishing-splash sounds are heard around Ominis' feet*

Ominis: You guys.... I think my left shoe is wet..

Sebastian: Oh.. your standing in a puddle of urine probably Ominis.

Ominis: *immediately pukes*

Sebastian: How lovely! Now it smells like urine, ass AND now Ominis over here.

MC: probably smells better than Mr. Fuzzy.

Sebastian: OH FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!!💢

[sokkigarden]

Hi babe. I have a special request cause I'm SAD! Can I get a jamie x reader where Jamie is always there to hear about readers failed dates but he's actually hopelessly in love with her? Then romantic reveal? Lots of kissing? Idk do what you want with it

tysm for sending this in! i didn't forget about this ask i swear! this drabble was sitting in my brain for days and i finally wrote it all out in a haze of productivity LOL. i hope you like this and i hope you aren't sad anymore eeee <333

i've loved you for so long

jamie tartt x female reader | 1.2k words | friends to lovers

“ugh i can’t believe i went out with him again! especially after the whole handshake thing.”

jamie looked over at you as you snuggled into his couch cushions, recounting yet another disastrous date you had just come from. he wanted to be a good friend and listen, but he was finding it hard to pay attention. his mind was aflutter with his own messy thoughts.

should he tell you the truth?

he loved being your friend and being there for you, especially on nights like these. he loved how your cheeks got flush as you talked too fast, giving every detail of the story. he loved how you clutched his throw pillow, still dressed up from your date but heels discarded by the front door. he loved how you spread your legs across his couch, like you owned the place. in a way you did. in a way, you owned his heart, his whole being; home and prized possessions be damned. 

he loved that he was the first person you wanted to talk to after a failed night out. among your many months of friendship, you had been a comfort to him in so many ways. he felt lucky to believe you thought the same of him. 

to put it simply, he loved you. everything about you. 

and he was a coward to not say anything. sitting in angsty silence as you talked about being wine-and-dined by other men every other week. he knew what you wanted, and he wanted that same thing, with you, so why couldn’t he just let himself admit it?

he hummed as you continued, nodding along to your story when appropriate. your feet were in his lap, and he ran his fingers gently along your calf, watching in the lowlight as you shivered at his touch.

“i should’ve known when he dropped me off with a handshake that it wouldn’t work out. a handshake! who does that!” you exclaimed. “like if you don’t want to kiss me, there are other options available.”

you huffed, awaiting his response, but suddenly the image of kissing you himself was all jamie could think of. up against the door to your flat. in the boot room. out on the pitch after a win. while cooking dinner together. in the morning between his sheets.

“that’s crazy,” he said absentmindedly. clearly not the response you were expecting from him.

“hm?”

“the fact he didn’t kiss you,” he added, speaking without fully thinking about what he was saying. “i would’ve.”

you rolled your eyes, shaking your head at his words. “thanks, jamie.” 

you clearly thought it was all a joke. as you let out a soft chuckle, you caught him staring at you intensely. jamie always gave you his full attention, but in that moment he couldn’t help himself. he knew he wore his emotions on his face but he refused to look away. 

he held your stare for a moment, before glancing from your eyes to your nose. his gaze lingered on your lips for a beat too long before he focused back on your eyes.

you broke eye contact first, looking away shakily. you pulled your feet off his lap and warning bells rang through his head. he’s messed this up. you were retreating from him, and he will never get to fully tell you how he feels. hell, you probably won’t even be his friend after this. 

he bit the inside of his cheek, trying to stave off the negative thoughts coursing through his head. he was brought back into the moment as he felt you shift closer, having set down the pillow you’d been holding. 

he didn’t dare to make a move, sitting frozen as he watched you come closer. he held his breath as you ran a hand gently through his hair and pressed an experimental kiss to the side of his mouth.

as soon as your lips touched, it was like jamie finally woke up. he took the opportunity in stride, kissing you like he’s wanted to for ages.

you were warm against him, and soft. so soft. he wound his arms around your torso, pulling you closer. he kissed you like it was his only chance to prove his love to you. your hands tangled in his hair, scratching your nails across his scalp. he felt alive for the first time. he didn’t want this moment to end. 

he pressed open mouthed kisses across your jaw and neck. he found a spot just beneath your ear that made you hum, low in your throat.

“you’re either an extremely good kisser or you’ve wanted to do this for a while,” you said, your voice a bit breathless. 

jamie’s conquest of your neck paused and he pulled back slightly. you wondered if you had ruined the moment. 

he looked deeply into your eyes as he affirmed, “both,” before seizing your lips again. you melted against him, and he wondered what he was so scared of. why he hadn’t done this sooner. 

“i’ve wanted you for so long,” he mumbled against your lips. 

now it was your turn to pause, as you broke apart. you blinked several times as if trying to clear your head. 

“jamie,” you started, and he felt his heart drop. here it comes. rejection. “you know i’m not just looking to hook up right? i keep going on these dates because i want to find something more.”

his eyebrows knitted together as he processed your words. did you really think all he wanted was to sleep with you? 

“do you really not know?” 

you shook your head in confusion. “know what?”

“how much i love you.”

jamie saw your eyes go wide and your mouth opened but no words came out. so there it was. he’d finally said it. there was no going back. he didn’t want to think about just how screwed up he was if you didn’t feel the same.

you slid your hands over his shoulders, clearly trying to process his words. finally you spoke.

“i didn’t know you felt this way.” 

jamie pulled away, creating distance between the two of you. he didn’t want your pity. he didn’t want you to let him down softly. he just wanted to finally be honest with himself, and with you. he hoped he was strong enough to face the consequences.

“it’s okay if you don’t,” he replied. “i just… it had to come out eventually i guess.”

you grasped his hand, running your fingers across his knuckles. you stared at the plains of his palm as you spoke.

“i was only going on so many dates to distract myself. to get past my feelings for you.” you finally glanced up at him. “i didn’t think i had a chance.”

jamie shook his head in disbelief. “how could you not? you’re everything to me.”

he squeezed your hands, holding eye contact, hoping his feelings crossed his face like every other emotion seemed to. in return, your eyes glistened in the lowlight. 

“we’ve always just been good friends,” you said, “and i’m not like the girls you normally date.”

suddenly jamie swept his arms around you, embracing you in a hug, burying his face in your hair. you hugged him back just as much.

“you’re so much more than that.” he murmured. 

you brought your lips to his once more, pouring every emotion into your kiss.

and in that moment, everything finally clicked into place.

song inspo: i've loved you for so long by the aces !!

friendly reminder that my inbox is always open for requests, but i might not write out drabbles for everything. i'm also open if you just want to chat about jamie, or ted lasso in general! <3

[miryum]

HI!!!! Good morning/afternoon/evening to youuu! First, I want to say I really enjoy your fics, it makes me feel like I'm on cloud 9. Too bad their just fiction. Anyways....

Idk if you write fics about benny watts, but ig it's worth a shot, I'm obsessed with play date by Melanie Martinez and that song really fit with benny. When benny was only with the reader to practice or play with her but they have a little thing that a couple does but without label. So the ready gets really tired and have a fight with him, and at the end benny told her his feelings.

Really hope you can make this. And advance thank you! <33

YES!!! My beloved Benny Watts!!!! I love him so much 😊 Thank you so much for your words, yet alas, mine are just fiction *sigh* (also, love your username)

Benny moved a rook across the chess board and your face scrunched up. You were nowhere near the level that the great Benny Watts was, but you liked the think you could predict his moves. You had known Benny since you were children, and therefore were able to practically able to read each other minds. That was an argument Benny used many times to rope you into playing chess with him. If you, the person who was able to prophesy his every move, wasn't able to beat him, then he was confident no one could.

You had tried multiple times to get out of playing chess with Benny (albeit thankful that it was a bit of steady income for the two of you, seeing as you were roommates), but he always managed to trick you into playing with him. Sometimes it was through bets, or he got you tipsy, or he simply looked up with you with puppy dog eyes and you melted.

It was hard though, being Benny's friend. You were constantly left alone at the apartment- if you could call it that- and sometimes had to pick up extra shifts because Benny was too engrossed in chess that he forgot to pick up a check. Your friends had urged you to move out, seeing how the stress could get to you, but you refused. You felt bad about the prospect of leaving Benny. He was your best friend, although you sometimes wondered if you were his. He clearly shared a special relationship with Arthur and Harry, simply because they were all the same sex.

And then there was Beth.

You were unsure of when the girl had first appeared in your life; she had just showed up at one point. And you saw how Benny reacted to her.

You were about to move a knight when a knock sounded on the door. Sharing a look with Benny, both silently agreeing to pause the game, you got up and opened the door. Sighing at the character who was waiting to come in, you moved back to the chess boar and plopped back down on the ground.

"Beth!" Benny smiled brightly. You hated him for it. Your feelings for Benny were probably a main factor in why you stayed by his side, even after he had pushed you into the friend-zone multiple times unknowingly.

"Are you guys playing?" Beth moved to sit by you.

You scooted away from her and towards Benny, gesturing to the board and saying, "Play for me, will you? I could never win against the prodigy."

"Hush," Benny took your hand in his. "You were doing wonderfully."

Without another word, you sat back and watched as the two young adults warred in a battle of the wits. No matter how many times you would watch it, you were always awed at the swift, defiant movements that they shared.

An unwanted pang of jealousy wormed its way into your stomach. Why couldn't you've been great at chess? Would Benny than pay more attention to you? And how could he be so blind? Who else had stood by his side for as long as you?

Throughout the match, Benny continued to hold you hand. When you went to pull away, reaching for a book or magazine to interest yourself in, he pulled you back and muttered something about 'his good luck charm'.

Rolling your eyes at his persistence, you shrugged him off. After a while, Benny was declared the winner, but by a slight margin. Even you were able to see how Benny narrowly avoided defeat. He had gotten lucky. Beth thanked you for letting her drop by, saying she had originally come for a book that Benny suggested. After she had left, you started to pack up the chess board. You had come to live with the fact that in your shared apartment with Benny, chess boards would outnumber anything else.

"You alright?" Benny stretched out on the floor, glancing over your figure.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Come on, Y/n." Benny shot you a hard look. "I've known you forever. I can see when something bugs you. Out with it."

"Are you blind?" You rounded on his suddenly, your odd question confusing the boy.

"What do you mean?"

"Can you see what's in front of your eyes?" you pressed again. "Because I don't think you can. Every time that Beth, a lovely girl, no doubt, but only a new, shiny toy to you, rounds the corner, you're transfixed and I can't understand why."

"Where is this coming from?" Benny exclaimed, feeling bombarded.

"Haven't I been enough?" You ignore him and continued on. "I've tried to be a great friend, but it's hard sometimes. It's especially hard when I've been crushing after you for the past few years and you can't realise that I like you!"

"You like me?" Benny stilled, blinking owlishly at you.

"Of course, you idiot!" You wanted to throw the chess board down but knew that a line you shouldn't cross. "We've had some pretty bad arguments in our lives and any other friends would've separated by now. Why do you think I always come back to you?"

Benny couldn't help but let a laugh escape. "You come back to me?" he clarified, shaking is head. "No, Y/n, I come back to you. God damn it, I like you too. Love you, in fact! Ever since I first set my eyes on you. You, may I remind you, had a school-girl crush on that one boy, Jack. So, I backed off. I've been harbouring feelings for you ever since."

You stared at him. "Pardon?" you asked finally.

"I guess I am blind." Benny flashed you a brilliant smile that made you melt. "Blinded by my love."

[babybluebex]

ok wait but now imagining paul not so subtly trying to get dom to ask out costar!you 😭😭 like imagine dom's just too nervous to ask you out to dinner or something after wrapping up a scene and paul's like 😒 and ASKS FOR DOM 💀 so paul going "hey, dom invited me out for dinner, which of course i'm flattered, but im a bit too old for him.....you should take my place!" and dom in the background looking absolutely mortified. cue confused reader !!

i also have been hallucinating this one small moment where you finished filming a bit later in the day compared to dom so you didn't get to eat yet. you show up to your trailer and see dom and he's like "finally im starving! burgers or pizza?" and you're like "girl what." and he's like "you haven't eaten yet and i wanted to eat with you" and you're just like "WHAT!" (🥹) and he's like "so pizza AND burgers?"

idk i need to go to sleep.

ugh my FAV idea is paul and da'vine watching you two being IDIOTS who don't see that you're falling for each other, and you tell da'vine how much you like dom but you're too nervous to say anything, and dom tells paul that he doesn't think he's good enough for you, and paul and da'vine collude to get yall together bc CLEARLY yall aren't gonna do it on your own

just little things at first, filming a scene outside and paul mumbles to dom "she looks cold... maybe you oughta give her your scarf" and dom does it without hesitation, and you smile at dom and paul is like success, or you and da'vine are cooking (bc ALL THE FOOD IN THE MOVIE WAS REAL AND AT LEAST PARTIALLY COOKED BY DA'VINE) and she "accidentally" overcooks a pan of brownies, and she says "go give them to the boy, he'll eat em" and you do, and dom is all red in the face and adores the gesture, and da'vine is back in the kitchen thinking like those kids are SO dumb

and it escalates in their poking and prodding, and dom tells paul one night "i just— i've never had any luck with girls" and paul is like "jesus christ, kid, see the writing on the wall! for the past six weeks, you've been worshiping this girl and she's been the same, and we wrap in a week, either ask her to dinner or shut up about it!" and he settles down and goes "sorry, that was mean. what i meant was—" but the snap of reality was exactly what dom needed to get off his ass, and he goes and finds you that very moment, and you're sitting chatting with da'vine, and you smile at dom as he enters the room "hey man! what's up?" and you notice his red cheeks and the intense look on his face, and you start to ask what's the matter, but he beats you to it, grabbing your face and kissing you, and you initially push him away "what the hell?" and he just all in one breath says "i think you're really beautiful and you're funny and silly but so caring and passionate, you take care of me even when you don't need to, because why would you need to, i'm a grown man, i can take care of myself, but i love the way you play with my hair and fall asleep on my shoulder during movie night, and we wrap in a week and i don't think i could live with myself if i didn't at least tell you how i feel, and paul says you feel the same way, and i usually believe whatever he says without hesitating, but i sorta worry he's wrong about it, so—" and you kiss him again to keep him quiet and you can't see her behind you, but da'vine is grinning bc fucking finally

and dom is a SWEETHEART when it comes to that second part. you had to film a scene that went on longer than expected, and dom has been wrapped for the day for a while, and the shoes you wore for the scene hurt your feet and you're tired and your body hurts and you just wanna lay down, and you get to your trailer and see the light on inside when you know you left the light off that morning, and you go in, and dom's got it all set up for you, an ocean of blankets on the couch and a pizza on your counter, and he's on the couch, remote in hand, navigating thru netflix, and you're like "the fuck is this?" and he's all puppy eyes at you "i knew you had a hard day, so i wanted to... i don't know, make it easy or something. i got your favorite pizza, and i washed these blankets so they smell nice and they just came out the dryer so they're still warm, and i'm trying to find that show you like but i can't find it, how do you spell 'derry'" and your face crumples up as you start to cry, and dom's face goes WHITE and he shoots up "oh god, i'm sorry, what did i do?" and he comes over and gingerly hugs you, and you cry into his neck and can barely gasp out "n-nothing's wrong, i-i'm just tired!" and he shushes you "maybe a little hangry too?" and you just "mhm" into his skin "that's what i thought, honey, c'mon sit down, i've got you" and that makes you cry harder and he's just sorta "... i'm really bad with girls, do you want me to let go and kick rocks, or..." and you just whimper "i've never had a boyfriend be so nice to me" and dom feels his heart shatter "jesus, really? what sorta guys have you been dating? cuz i— look at me, baby, look into my eyes— i like you. a whole lot. but i care about you too, and i care about the fact that you feel like shit and had a bad day, and because i like you so much and i care about you, i just wanna... just wanna make sure you're ok. ok?" and you sniffle and nod, and he ducks his head to get his face in your lowered eyeline "ok??" and you sorta huff out a laugh "oh, c'mon, you can do better than that. i'm not letting go of you until you give me a real laugh. even if it's fake, pretend it's real" and you roll your eyes and he sorta shakes you "c'mon, you can do it. or do i need to start singing at you? because i can!" and you start to slink away from him, but he pulls you in close and kisses your head "go get into some pjs, i brought one of my shirts for you to wear, it's on your bed with those sweatpants you wear all the time" and by the time you get changed and grab a slice of pizza and get settled on the couch in dom's arms, you realize he's not eating "you're not hungry?" "nah not really..." and it's only after you're full that he reveals the truth to you "i haven't eaten all day. i wanted you to eat all you wanted and not have to worry about me :)"

[coltrainbat]

Ari is divorced and moving out of the house to an apartment where he meets a happy married, reader with big breasts. Her husband is out of town one day, she and ari have intense sexual one night stand

Neighbours

A/N: I'm baaaaccckkkkk and as always I have something to say ☺️ I am in love with Ari Levinson. Great request but I have to ponder... If reader is “happily married” then why would she cheat? I feel like her being married adds absolutely nothing to the plot, so we are gonna change it to obsessed ex because like… mi no comprehend how happy = cheating. Also, I feel cheating can be triggering for some.

I also think I forgot how to write so please give feedback on this one, like why are some bits in past tense??? Idk I'm insecure validate me 🥺

WARNINGS: SMUT MINORS DNI. 8k filth, oral (f receiving, m receiving), dirty talk, sex, orgasm, P in v, Daddy kink (naturally), hair pulling, spit, shitty exes, swearing.

You sat in your apartment, comfy on the couch and freshly single. While most people would see this as a great time to spend their Friday nights going to clubs, seeking for a new dick to get under – you found it the perfect time to bask in the freedom of having uninterrupted you time. That was until a knock at the door caught you off guard.

You sprung up with a groan, tip toeing to look through the peephole and find out who had the audacity to knock on your door at 10:30 on a Friday night.

“Brian” You muttered under your breath in a disdained tone.

Brian. Your whiny, dickish, loser ex. Who despite not having any concrete plans for life besides his regular Friday night strip club visit still thought you could prove yourself to be more “wife material’. By that he meant, on top of making dinner, picking him up at 2am from said strip club visits so he didn’t have to spend money on a Taxi. Safe to say, dumping him didn’t hurt as much as you thought it would.

You pulled open the door, standing in your almost too small pyjama set. “Can I help you?”

“I think you can.” He gave you a sick smirk, closing the space between you by moving his hands towards your waist.

“Don’t fucking touch me Brian. We aren’t together.” Slapping his hand away.

“Don’t be a bitch, everyone hooks up with their ex.”

“Well, I don’t want so can you please leave?” You heard heavy footsteps coming up the stairs from the lobby and you got anxious at the thought of a neighbour witnessing this cringe worthy altercation.  

“I’m not leaving until you let me in.” He moved his foot past the threshold of the door frame, to prevent you from closing the door on his face.

“Brian you can’t-“

“She said leave.” A foreign voice sounded from down the hallway cutting you off, both your heads flung to the source.

The tall, brooding man had only been your neighbour for a week, you passed by each other with tight smiles both of you too occupied to say hello. But that didn’t stop you from getting a good look at him. He was handsome in a ruggish way, often only sporting shorts and wife beaters, sweat forming on his head as he lugged boxes into his apartment. You noticed the gold band on his large finger, yet no man or wife in sight. Yet, today there was no ring and he had swapped the wife beater for a button up shirt and jeans.

“Who the fuck are you?” Brian spat at the man who could beat him to a pulp with minimal effort. Ah Brian, always so confident for a man whose dick was the size of your pinky.

Your hide your face in your hands in a mix of embarrassment and frustration.

“Ari, now I suggest you leave her alone.” He moved closer to you both, slightly moving his body in front of you, blocking Brian from entering.

“She’s my girlfriend and this was our apartment so I think I can stay but thanks pal.” Brian sounded confident but his voice waivered as he cranked his neck to look up at Ari.

“I’m not your girlfriend.” Ari looked back at you, catching your eyes, giving you a soft smile.

“Well, that settles it so either you leave, or I make you leave.” Ari knelt a little, getting close to Brian’s face his voice was calm and level, but his eyes told Brian he wasn’t bluffing.

Brian huffed and made his way back down the hall, not before turning back “Enjoy her she’s a bitch but she’s slutty.”

Ari flashed a glowing smile and a prominent middle finger as he pushed his way into your apartment, closing the door behind him.

“You, ok?”

“I’m used to it but thank you for helping he wouldn’t have never left if you didn’t step in.”

“Don’t worry about it but you look like you need a stiff drink – got anything good?”

“Tequila?”

“Perfect.” He purred, following you as you made your way to your small bar cart, catching a glimpse of the soft skin that hang out slightly from your pyjama shorts.

You grabbed the bottle and twisted the cap;

“You know your wife’s really lucky to have you around.” You spoke as you poured two shots.

“Ex-wife.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be she was my equivalent of him.” You both chuckled at the mutual understanding of horrible exes.

“Y/N, by the way.” You spoke as you handed him the novelty shot glass.

“Good to finally put a name to my pretty neighbour.” You blushed as you clinked glasses, both downing the burning liquid in sync.

“Another?” You smirked at him.

1 shot turned into 4 as you and Ari sat on your couch, bonding over stories of your exes’ antics and anxieties about re-entering the dating scene. Both losing track of time as the hours fell into early morning. But neither of you felt tired, invigorated by your conversation and the upper coursing through your veins.

“She did not!” You hand fell to your mouth as Ari recounted the story of walking in on his ex fucking his friend on their kitchen counter.

“She did.” He nodded slowly, sipping his beer as he recalled on the sight.

“Well, she’s crazy. I mean, why would anyone cheat on you… when they have well… YOU. God, I mean if I had my own version of sexy Jesus at home, I’d never leave bed.” Ari’s eyes went dark at your bold comment as the image of you and him in bed clouding his mind.

You swallowed hard, realising the tequila was speaking for you and you had invertedly just admitted you found your neighbour hot.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to say you were hot, I mean yes you are hot but-“

“Sexy Jesus?”  He crocked an eyebrow at you.

“Yeah, I mean you know with the hair and beard... like… Jesus”

“I’m Jewish.”

“So, you could possibly be a descendent of Jesus then.” You tried to muffle the laugh threatening to spill as your nonsensical statement. But Ari beat you to it, reaching forward in a fit of laughter, his hand grabbing his pecs.

“You are something else Y/N… in a good way, I see why your ex showed up at your door.”

“What can I say I’m very addictive.” You twirled your hand along the rim of your glass, avoiding his prominent gaze.

“Was he telling the truth about that last comment?”

“That I’m his girlfriend? No no we definitely broke up.”

“No, I meant that you’re slutty.”

Your eyes widened and the mouthful of drink you just sipped threatened to spit out.

“I mean that depends…”

“On…?”

“On your definition of slutty.”

“I took it as you were good in the sack.” He was leaning back on the couch now, his long arms stretched along the back, his hand deathly close to your neck.

“I am not “good in the sack”, I am fucking great in the sack.” You leaned in closer to his figure on the last line, your face getting closer to his. Slowly placing your drink onto the coffee table.

He licked his lips in hunger, shortly before he closed the space between you two, his hand falling to your cheek to pull you closer.

You closed your eyes, relaxing into the soft feeling of his beard against your skin as you explored each other’s mouths.

In a swift motion, his mouth never leaving yours, he placed his drink next to yours, moving his hand back to you cup your ass that was slowly raising itself off the couch.

Moving his hand downwards, hooking your leg over his lap so your chest was now pressed against his button up shirt. Not satisfied at the feeling of fabric against you, you pulled away to undo the buttons, revealing his tanned, hairy chest and the shiny gold Star of David chain.

His chest heaved, watching you eagerly as you fiddled with the buttons. “Oh, fuck it!” You ripped his shirt to reveal the delectable abs hidden underneath. Your mouth returning to his as you ran your hands through his dark, shiny locks. He shimmied the rest of the flannel off, hands going to the hem of your cami, eager to reveal the plump, delicious tits, constrained by the fabric. With a final pull over your head, your breasts bounced, hard nipples falling in place against his chest.

“Jesus Christ.” He huffed out, pausing momentarily to admire the sight in front of him. His lips moved from your mouth to your jaw, nipping and sucking at your skin down your neck towards your breasts.

His hands cupped the supple flesh, bringing it to his mouth as he sucked delicately on the hard nib. His eyes looked up at you past his long lashes as your head fell back in pleasure.

He moaned as your pulled on his hair. His hands, took a firm grip of your ass, raising his hips slightly, flipping you on your back with ease, you lay exposed across the couch. Leaping up to undo the zip of his jeans, shoes long discarded he stepped out of the worn denim. Your hands grabbed at the clothed, outline of his cock in his briefs, eager to taste the hunky man. Positioning yourself at the edge of the couch. Ari crouched his knees slightly, noting his height, eager to let you at your want.

Revealing his cock, your eyes widened at his size, bigger than anything you’ve ever seen and much bigger than Brian. You grabbed his base, kitty licking at the plump head, catching the loose drops of pre-cum that oozed from his red slit.

“Fuck Y/N, I knew you knew your way around a cock.” You smirked up at him as his hands pulled your hair into a ponytail, taking the hair tie from his wrist and securing it.

You placed the thick head in your mouth, pushing your spit onto his cock as you ran your lips up and past the head.

“You think you can take the whole thing baby?” He quipped at you.

Giving him a small nod, you opened your mouth wider, flattening your tongue on the underside of his cock as you slowly moved you head forward to let his cock push down your throat.

“Fuck baby! That’s it.” Ari’s hands clutched your ponytail tightly, edging his hips towards your head slowly.

You pulled out, looking up at him, with spit smothered around your lips “Don’t hold back Daddy.” Ari groaned roughly, head falling back at the sight of the beautiful woman on her knees in front of him calling him such a salacious name. It was all he needed to roughly fuck your throat, the sounds of your gags and wet, sloppy punctures filling the room.

He pulled your head back by your ponytail, you whined at the loss of his cock.

“You’re so good at it baby but I need that pussy.” He looked down on you with awe. You nodded, shuffling back onto the couch. Ari fell to his knees, head inches away from your pussy as he helped you pull your shorts down.

His mouth immediately went between your thighs, spitting on your exposed cunt before flattening his large tongue on your heat, leaving a long strip of warm, wetness from the skin above your ass to the tip of your clit. Sucking on the sensitive pearl as you mewled at the sensation. He moved downwards, nudging the tip of his tongue at your weeping hole as his beard brushed against your sensitive clit creating a sensation you have never experienced but was addictive. The bristles moving roughly against any inch of exposed skin.

“Ari please I need it!” You begged as you pushed his head closer to your core.

He stopped suddenly, pulling away to look up at your flushed face, sweat formed on your forehead. “What’d you call me?”

“Daddy, please fuck me.” You looked into his deep blue eyes, need in your voice.

“That’s better.” He smirked up at you, moving upwards to join you on the couch. You pulled him closer desperate to taste yourself on his lips. His movements slowed as he moved his hand to support your head pulling it back slightly to get deeper into the kiss.

Between the rushed, desperation appeared a moment of deep intimacy and want for the person in front of you. He grabbed his cock in his hand and slowly glided it through your wet folds, catching your deep moan as his length filled your tight, velvety interior.

Slowly, he moved in and out, eager not to go too far out and lose the sensation of finally being inside of you.

Letting out a deep groan as you ran your nails down his back, leaving long, red marks.

“Harder Daddy please… I need it.”

He looked at you, strands of sweaty hair sticking to his forehead, dipping his head down to give you a soft, wet kiss, pulling out, he grabbed your chin with his thumb and pointer, opening your mouth slightly as he spit roughly down your throat. You swallowed his spit greedily, flashing him an innocent smile which quickly faded as he pulled out to the edges of your entrance and thrusted roughly back in. You gasped at the sudden hit of his bulbous tip at your cervix. The repeated assault at your most sensitive core caused the coil inside you to tighten, your desperately grabbed at his large arms for stability, nails digging into his hard skin as your release rushed out of you and seeped down his length.

“That’s its baby let it out, fuck that makes me close.” His eyes darted between your two sexes, watching as the cream wrapped around his base like a decorative bow. His thrusts became sloppy as he chased his high, savouring the feeling of being inside of you amongst your juices.

He collapsed into the warm embrace of your chest, softly kissing the supple skin of your breast as you both breathed heavy post the best sex of your lives. As his now limp cock fell out of you along with the sticky, hot mix of your release.

Your eyes squinted at the sudden realisation of light pouring through your window, releasing it was now sunrise, tiredness took over you.

You shook the heavy man on you “Ari, it’s morning, do you want to come back to bed with me?”

“Don’t have to ask me twice.” He steadied himself by his arms on either side of your head as he rose. Holding out his hand to help your shaky figure up and into the bedroom. Arms forming a tight grip on your hips as you hobbled towards your bed.

You both collapsing, ready to enjoy a well-deserved sleep.

[dragonzfanfics11]

Hola, I'm back for more food. Can I request a poly sbg (again.) with a fem reader who is like Wonyoung from Ive (and she's an undercover singer and they all find out because they searched up her group name because they heard people *cough cough *Barron* talking about her (yummy)

yess! Thanks for the request! :> idk who wonyoung is exactly but I'll try my best with the undercover singer part!

Im still new to writing so sorry if it's not the best

Summery- the sbg gang over heard barron talking about you and find out your an undercover singer! Small story/one-shot with headcanons at the end for each character

Warnings, some swearing, def spelling errors, y/n is used

Quick color key- ashlen aiden logen tyler taylor ben barron and you (I tryed to make Barron's text black it wouldn't let me 😔)

Sbg x singer reader

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ash,aiden,logen,tyler,taylor, and ben where all walking down the hall you where somwere else doing your own thing at the time

"Ya did you hear about that y/n kid? Ya, can't believe someone like them woul be in here with us"

The group over heard barron talking with his friends and stopped when they heard your name

"Ya, why would they even wanna be here? If there so 'famous' and all why wouldn't they idk go somewhere fancy or something?"

Barron and his group laughed for a moment before tyler called out annoyed

"Hey, what the heck are you guys talking about?"

"Ya why are you talking about y/n like that?"

"What do you dorks want? Do you wanna get beat up this time?"

Him and his friends laughed while the twins both stand with there arms crossed, aiden is making sure ben dosent try and hurt them, and ashlen steps up

"Last I remember you where the ones leaving with the most bruises"

"Ya you should've seen yourselfs you looked terrible! Ha ha!"

Barron scoffs crossing his arms

"We asked you a question answer it"

"Where not in class yet nerd im not talking to you for a quiz"

Ben tryes to step forward with his fists clenched but aiden holds him back with the help of Taylor

"Tell is what the hell your saying about y/n barron"

Tyler says steping infront of logen ashlen next to him

"Ugh, fine, there's been rumors about y/n being some undercover singer and she sure as he'll looks like the one from (band name)"

"Oh I've heard of that band they have some pretty good songs"

"Ya I've heard of them to"

"Seriously? I bet they suck if it's from her"

"Oh shut up already barron"

They all walk away before he could even reply and taylor searches up the band

"Holy crap he's not wrong it actually looks like y/n!"

"Wait really?"

"Whoa she's right!"

They all look at the pictures of the bands and it really does look like you so they went to go find you eventually finding you in the music room

"Hey! Y/n! You never said you where a singer!"

"Aiden!"

"How did you figure that out!?"

You ask shocked you where hoping to keep low and not draw to much attention to yourself, ben walks up to you and typing on his phone then showing it to you

"We overheard barron talking about you"

"How did he find out then?!"

"He said there was some rumors"

"I was hoping to lay low here but I guess that's not happening..." you sigh and look down before feeling a hand on tour shoulder

"There just rumors right now you can still lay low"

"Ya, we can figure something out to convince people it's not you"

"Ya! We already fight phantoms every night how hard is stoping a rumer?"

"You'd be suprised-"

"Can we hear one of your songs?"

"Oh! Ya!! Can we?! Can we?!"

You look around at them thinking for a moment as aiden and Taylor look at you excitedly the rest of the group looking some-what curious

"...I guess one song wouldn't hurt before class-"

"Yaayy!!!"

Headcanon time!!

Ashlen

I think she'd definitely listen to you practice and be somewhat supportive even adding a few songs to her Playlist if she has one

Aiden

I think he'd beg you to play all the time and listen to all of your songs at least once and be super exited whenever your thinking of making a new song and begs to know the progress every time and wants to be first to hear it

Logen

I think he'd like to listen to you practice like ashlen just more and do some research on your band maybe just to know more about it and depending on what music you play even put some on his Playlist

Ben

Hed probably love to listen to you practice or play all of the time and maybe even help you write new songs and play guitar for you while you practice, probably has a few of your songs on his Playlist as well

Tyler

Definitely acts like he dosent care but won't complain when you practice or play around him and I feel like he'd sorta be like your personal bodyguard around school or places your trying to lay low, might not have any songs on his playlist but has heard some of of taylors

Taylor

Would probably love to listen to you play and practice all the time and even tryes to sing with you sometimes, probably has a few songs on her Playlist to

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This was my first fanfic with headcanons so I hope it was good!

[nalyra-dreaming]

Thank you for your consistently detailed analysis and speculation which have frequently calmed me down when I was concerned about the direction of the show. As long time VC fan, I'm not gonna lie, this show has often left me heartbroken- and not in a good way. I've been trying to get through it in hopes when we will finally get to see the real Lestat. But honestly, for me, if the drop is left in, than the character is done. There is no way to redeem him. And it just hurts because not only is it something that Lestat would never do to Louis, but it's something that was actually done to *him*. He suffered for years from that fall and it was one of the main reasons he went in the ground. It's important for his character development. I just don't understand the justification for leaving it as is especially since it isn't canon. I don't think I can take another 2+ years of Lestat being called an evil domestic abuser. How can audiences be expected to root for him. They won't. He will be condemned as the monster who dropped his partner from the stratosphere. Leaving it also ruins the L+L QotD flight. I just don't see the point in irrevocably damaging the main protagonist of the entire story. I'm heartbroken and furious. Please, help me understand.

*sighs* (Sending you a big hug.)

So. Emotions seem to be very high on this already, and it hasn't even aired yet. I'm just pointing that out because... what we have right now is hearsay - maybe directly, maybe over a few people in the middle... but ultimately we haven't watched it yet, right? Other people have. Other people, with their own understanding, and their own takes.

And yes, it was done to him. Exactly. And as just said in another ask, he has not told his side of the story yet. The trial, so also that part of it... will definitely be scripted. And we already know that what we were shown... cannot be trusted. Not a 100%.

Let's watch first and then judge, please.

Because so far this show has excelled at elevating the source material.

Which is not to say that they cannot make mistakes, obviously. And who knows, maybe I'll be disappointed AF after. We'll see.

But... there's a reason why they revisit all that. There's a reason. And, given that we're segueing into s3... and therefore Lestat's story?

I don't know how they re-contextualize it. I don't. But I think we need to see the bigger picture - and that won't be done by s2. (And I have a feeling like it might not even be done by s3...)

IF they follow the book IWTV here... then Lestat will testify against Louis and Claudia at the trial, seemingly out of revenge (but actually under duress), he will witness her burn, he will have the yellow dress. Louis and Armand will break up. Lestat and Louis will meet in the later contested NOLA meeting. Louis will end up alone at the end of the novel.

I don't know how the revisit fits with the trial. You probably know my feelings wrt the diary and the pages etc but it seems they are not used as heavily as anticipated.

IDK. Given the in-universe publication of the book IWTV I think they will follow the beats above - and episode 5, and the drop, are likely part of the accusation then.

Now, we know that it will be revealed later that this was done with manipulation and torture. That it was Lestat who was thrown off the tower later, and who needed decades to heal. Which fits with the "mind call" in 2x05, doesn't it.

IDK. I just want to point out that even if... EVEN IF THAT DROP STAYS FOR NOW - there is a lot more to it and they have already hinted at that.

So.

Yes, I can very well do without another 2 years of shit-show by some people, especially those unwilling to take the step back for the bigger picture. But ... I have become much, much better at blocking.

And I am not going to let them take away my joy. Especially... ESPECIALLY that we know - WE KNOW - that TVL is up in s3. They already confirmed that.

Don't let an unfinished puzzle or some asshats take your joy either, dear.

[yakumtsaki]

-Welcome to my ancestral Greek House, darling! -Oh baby it's so beautiful, huhu!🌞

I don't wanna know where the fuck you lived before, Meadow, but yes, we have arrived, part 1 here. And now it's time to christen our new household:

Perfect! Cheerleader Kea why are you here?

-Are those Sophito's kids?

They sure are.

-Wow, really dodged a bullet there.

You sure did.

-NOT ONLY DID I LOSE THE INAUGURAL FIGHT I'M ABOUT TO GO INTO ASPIRATION FAILURE

Wtf do you want me to do about it?

-YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT

NO WAY

-YES

NO

-YES

I can't say no to my sims, it's an actual problem. HELLO GUNNAR, I HATE YOU

-Don't talk to him that way!!! -Nah it's fine, no worries, bro. Wanna get down?

GROSS. Barth seriously, please, WE CAN DO BETTER

-Can you? They seem perfectly matched to me!

Felina will you please fuck off?

-Can't, Meadow got me super into bird watching.

At night in the rain??

-Ok busted, I just wanna watch Barfolomew flop yet again!

HE'S NOT GONNA FLOP. THERE'S NO WAY HE FLOPS WITH FUCKING GUNNAR

-Wanna bet?

STOP IT

S T O P . I T .

NO WAY

BARTHOLOMEW YOU ARE THE WORST ROMANCE SIM OF ALL TIME HOLY HELL

-What you doing, bro?! -You said you wanted to get down! -I meant drugs! -What! That's not what that means, you stupid turtle-faced moron! -WHAT DID YOU CALL ME

Bartholomew if you end up getting beaten up by fucking Gunnar Roque I will legit die.

-That's so hot, bro, call me more names!

GUNNAR WTF

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME, GUNNAR YOU WANTED NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM GO BACK TO THAT

-Oh Gunnar, in my family we value the exquisite Komei jaw, there's something so rebellious in your lack of chin! -Ya, call me a turtle again!

GOD

OK THEN, we are officially turtle lovers. Bartholomew let me tell you, I caved this time because of your pathetic aspiration but this is NEVER HAPPENING AGAIN. I've worked hard to make you people attractive and I'm not about to throw it all away on Gunnar Roque's spawn!!!

-Maybe we'll be childfree!

I'll do you one better, how about Gunnarfree! Now Gunnar fuck off back to the gutter you crawled from. -Sure thing, bro, later. -You can't keep us apart!

I CAN AND I WILL

Jojo's wolf mania has clearly inflicted some generational trauma on his family as Barth rolls this fear of Gunnar becoming a werewolf, which would clearly be an improvement on his looks.

-STOP TALKING ABOUT GUNNAR LIKE THAT. Now back to my song.. I've got sunshine on a cloudy day.. When it's cold outside, I've got the month of May.. I guess you'd say, what can make me feel this way? My Gunnar, my Gunnar, my Gunnar, talkin about my Gunnar..🎵

Literally kill me.

-You know what my favorite thing is about our relationship, darling? -What, huhu?🌞 -The way we both have appropriately sized chins!

Fel seriously why are you like this, what did I ever do to you??

-OH, LIKE YOU DON'T REMEMBER!

Remember WHAT

-THE WAY YOU JUST STOOD BY AND LET BARF RUIN MY PARTY

Are you serious, you're still not over that bs??

-I'LL NEVER GET OVER IT. AND WHEN THOSE CHINLESS BABIES ARE BORN YOU'LL HAVE GOTTEN WHAT YOU DESERVE!!!

Well screw you, I won't let that happen! I'll find someone else for Barth!! Someone who has a chin!!!

-IT'S NOT GONNA WORK OUT WITH ANYONE ELSE YOU DUMBASS, THIS IS BARF WE'RE TALKING ABOUT

YOU'RE WRONG AND I'LL PROVE IT

-Zat's ein wunderbar eyepatch, Barthölömew, ja? -I HATE YOUR GLASSES. SLEEP WITH ME

-So the funniest thing happened at class today- -YOUR PORES ARE HUGE, YOU NEED MAKE UP. SLEEP WITH ME

-Oh, I knew your parents back in the day! -TERRIBLE HAIRCUT. SLEEP WITH ME

-WAHHH I'LL NEVER HAVE A FAMILY -NO YOU WON'T. I WANT TO BEAT UP MY SISTER. SLEEP WITH ME

Oh my God you are USELESS

-My negging tactics will work, you'll see!

-Soon I'll be the one making out in our front yard!

Ya idk Barth, this is the most pathetic picture of all time. I'm seriously considering cheating and changing your aspiration, like it's unreal how bad you are at it.

-I'm not bad at it, moron, I'm being strategic! Now it's time to invite them over and see my work bear fruit!

God you are so gross, maybe you do belong with Gunnar.

FUCK ME IT WORKED. SARAH WTF

I can't believe this is happening and neither can anyone else by the looks of it-

-YET HERE WE ARE. 2/20 I guess??

-I told you! Stick with me and we'll neg every dormie on this campus!

That's not a goal I want to achieve, Barth!

-See you later, Barth, I'm very satisfied, I'll leave you a 5 star review!

Now that I'm thinking about it, between Gunther, Cyn, Sophito and Barth we've really been operating a Greek House/Brothel for 4 gens, go us!

I'm still having a hard time believing Barth is actually good at being a romance sim, especially because Sarah has been completely desperate ever since Cyn stole evil wizard Matthew Hart from her, so I immediately invite over Sam Thomas-

-AND IT WORKS AGAIN THO GLITCHED. WTF. Ok Barth so I guess you actually ARE competent?? Who knew.

-I knew! I always believed in Barth!

GET OUT OF HERE SUNSET

And now, time for a tragedy in 3 parts:

So next day I'm feeling confident enough that we invite over Klara, my top pick for Barth spouse and she is INTO him, let's do this, Barth!!!

SUNSET

-Heeeeeeeeey Barth, what's up?🥰 -Ich habe urgent hömewörk das dö.

KLARA DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT LEAVING THEM ALONE

-Congrats on your great first semester grades, Sunset! -Wanna congratulate me on my first kiss, too? -What?

OK THEN FML I GUESS. I mean I knew this would happen the day he brought her home from school and they were dancing for like 4h but still it's very upsetting.

Let's figure out the degree of relation here so we know how grossed out we should be, so they are connected through Daniel-Jojo. So her grandfather and his great-grandfather were brothers, which makes them 2nd cousins once removed. It honestly doesn't sound THAT bad, but I think the word 'removed' is really doing the heavy lifting here.

Anyway, we took a small break to kiss our cousin, now let's go back to our date with our future wife!

-Are you enjoying this magical slow dancing in the kitchen, babe? It's a move my dad taught me. -Ja, ich was here to see your höe vater.

Oh right didn't Klara turn down Sophito LOL. But his even more degenerate son she couldn't resist, Klara wtf!

-Just give me 1 second babe, I'll be right with you-

OH MY GOD COME ON. POOR KLARA

-Sorry, Klar, this is lasting longer than expected, why don't you put a movie on and hang out? -Ja, ök.

KLARA

-All done babe, come here! -Ohöhö! -Blood is thicker than water, Klara!

SUNSET FFS

B R O

Klara I can't believe this title goes to you of all people but you are without a doubt the biggest cuck we've ever encountered, I am legit shocked by this sequence of events.

-5/20 IN 2 DAYS. AND YOU THOUGHT I WAS A FLOP ROMANCE SIM. EVERYONE DID. EVEN MY GRANDMAS MADE FUN OF ME. WELL I'LL SHOW YOU ALL!!!!

Great! Barth is at 5/20 woohoos and I'm at 2/2 for supervillain origin stories this gen, it's all working out!

[krash-and-co]

haven't done this in a while, so here !! l&co as stuff I've heard/said in the past few months, bc I don't remember exact exchanges before then 👍👍

arguably more unhinged for reasons unknown. fate of Gods favorite clown idk

Lucy: I thought Billie Joe Armstrong went to the moon for a long time, honestly.

~

Lucy: [calling Barnes] there's a stranger at our house. she tried really hard to get in, and--

Lockwood, in the distance: we broke all the stranger danger rules.

Lucy: we broke all the stranger danger rules.

~

Holly: Lockwood, you have the coolest style.

Lockwood: thanks!

Lucy: what?!? she just tells me I look gay.

Lucy: and homeless.

~

holly: I want to help disabled kids ride a tricycle. wait, I meant to say horses.

lockwood: you want to help disabled horses ride a tricycle??????

~

Lucy: I don't have mommy issues I just don't like my mom.

~

Lucy: you gave me a framed photo for my birthday

Lucy: and within thirty minutes you stepped on it.

Lockwood: but then I bought you a new frame!!!

Lucy: and then I opened it, and it looked like you stepped on it.

Lockwood: well I'm not buying you another one.

~

skull: ugh, theyre so obsessed with how they look.

lucy, nodding: yeah, they're all "oh I'm so perfect!" preps. they definitely shave their legs.

~

Lockwood: I need to work on my swearing problem, cuz there are adults around and they don't li-- *drops thermos* ow FUCK

~

Lockwood: shut the windows. shut the fucking windows, I feel like we're being watched.

Lucy: hahaha, this is fucking terrifying.

Lockwood: here are the knives.

Holly: do you have any baseball bats? I don't want to stab people.

George: no, but we have crutches. we can hit people with them.

Holly, nodding: that's good.

~

Lockwood: I'm stupid.

Kipps: no you're not- yes you are. I don't know why I said you're not, so I had to correct myself.

~

holly: if we kill someone, we'll get in.... trouble.

~

George: shit!! I mean fuck!!! I mean crap!!!

Lucy, hitting him repeatedly: stop CURSING YOU FUCKING-- DANG IT!!!!!

~

Holly: do you ever get the urge to be randomly violent, like-

[loud clatter as lockwood and kipps beat each other up in the background]

holly: yeah like that.

~

Kipps, on searching for Bobby: I used to just grab any kid I saw about his height with brown hair, but that caused problems.

~

Lucy: what's your biggest fear?

Lockwood: what? spiders.

Lucy: no the other one

Lockwood: change.

Lucy: no the-- the other one.

George: what do you WANT FROM HIM-

~

lucy: you're going to make me have a gambling addiction.

skull, nodding: that's the idea.

~

George: pff my mom says im special.

Lockwood: im also special! they put me in classes about it.

[Lockwood and George burst out laughing while everyone else stares]

~

[Lucy and George are punching each other, screaming, and spewing out profanity in sign language]

George: literally nobody even looked up

Lucy: we're at the point where it's normal

George: yeah, haha!

Lucy: haha!

[a moment of heavy breathing and grinning before they begin fucking attacking each other again]

~

George, to Lucy: ugh im so sore. why do you keep punching me.

[Lucy punches him]

~

ok last one but this was a hell of a fucking convo and it was so funny everyone just jumped in with random twists 😭😭

[kipps crew, l&co, and flo are all sitting in barnes otherwise empty office]

George: kipps sounds terminally online, but I can't figure out yet if it's the normal kind or if he has. like. a kin list.

Lucy: the two extremes. normal or homestuck.

George: I read all of homestuck but it's okay I'm normal now

skull: im-

lucy: skull YOU'RE terminally online, but like the video gamer kind. kipps sounds like he had a my hero academia phase.

Lockwood: I was friends with someone who would roleplay mha all the time.

George: like pretend to have powers or something?

Lockwood: no, like pretend to be the characters. interact as them.

bobby: I don't roleplay, but I like to imagine I'm a different person with powers sometimes :)

ned: ha, furry.

flo: furry? one of my friends knows a furry who got her tail stolen, and she's in the office right now.

Lockwood: like today??

flo: yeah today. she's there right now.

Lockwood: [silence] oh.

flo: yeah they just. yoink.

[silence]

bobby: .....im not a furry but--

Lucy: aaaand gonna stop you right there before you make things worse for yourself

kat: why can't we EVER have normal conversations