#If kei sees this I luv u <3

[222col]

second best

★ patrick zweig x reader ★ you and patrick are both in relationships, but after meeting at an event, you can't quit each other. you both know it's wrong, but you just can't stop. you're addicted to each other, unable to go without your fix. ★ 10.2k ★ 18+ | cw: angst, cheating, smut: unprotected sex, choking, slapping, f oral ★ an: this one took me a while, hope u luv ! <3

it's not like you and patrick don't acknowledge you shouldn't be doing what you're doing, you do, often. but there's something about patrick zweig that just keeps drawing you back in. he feels the same, patrick may look like he has very few morals, but typically, cheating is something he'd never do. usually, when in a relationship, patrick's completely locked in. but there's something different about what you two share. yeah, it's sex, but it's more. it's primal, the attraction, the whole experience. there should be guilt, you should both feel so guilty that it doesn't continue, so sick to your stomachs that you can't fathom seeing each other again, but you don't. the relationship you share with patrick overshadows every other feeling you could endure. it's an automatic reaction, an addiction, something neither you or patrick could begin to live without anytime soon. it all started two months ago, you'd been with your boyfriend a year, patrick in his relationship nine months. you met at an adidas party a few years into patrick's career, during your second season in professional tennis. setting eyes on patrick across the dance floor, it was as though you could feel your body come alive.

red dress slick to your skin, hips swaying, hands in your hair as you locked eyes with patrick. signature smirk plastered on his face, beer in hand as he watched you dance. licking his lips as you excused yourself and headed his way. it was almost involuntary as your feet started moving, feeling yourself being physically drawn to him. "like what you see, huh?" hands on hips as you speak the first words to patrick. he chuckles slightly, eye contact unbroken. "something like that." patrick introduces himself as you do, flirty smiles across both of your faces. you didn't need to speak to understand each other, know exactly what the other was really thinking, it went unspoken. "do you want a drink?" patrick asks, free hand slipping into his pocket. nodding your head as patrick leads you to the bar, buying you your favourite and moving to occupy a couple empty seats away from the crowd. "just to let you know, i have a boyfriend." you start, met with a hum from patrick, leaning his elbows on his knees as you sit opposite him. "and i have a girlfriend, doesn't mean i can't talk to you, does it?" you both know this isn't going to end with talking, but for now, you'll ignore the tension in the air between you. telling yourselves that you're good people, and would never dream of cheating on your partners.

the two of you sit for a while, discussing your tennis careers, how you got into the sport. flirty smirks and heavy eye contact filling the empty gaps, noticing the time and lack of bodies at the party, you stand, ready to say your goodbyes, but stopped by patrick. "we're at the same hotel, right? come have a nightcap with me." he offers, standing up with you, closing some distance. "that sounds like playing with fire." you half laugh, acknowledging the tension for the first time out loud tonight, only adding more excitement to the air. patrick raises his eyebrow to you, the corner of his lips turning upwards. breathing out, knowing there was no saying no to that damn smirk, you accept. patrick's hand pressed lightly to your back, leading you away from the party. it was only a short walk back to your hotel, his hand staying put against the fabric of your dress. both of you so aware this nightcap was nothing short of an excuse for more time together, specifically, time alone away from onlookers eyes. patrick's hand only dropping to his side to fish his hotel key from his pocket, showing you into his room. opening the mini fridge he pours you both a drink, sitting next to each other on the couch underneath the hotel room windows, his hand draped across the back, beside your shoulder.

facing each other slightly, the electricity in the air only becoming more obvious by the lack of space between your bodies. shoes kicked off feet beside the couch, holding the glass between your hands as patrick's eyes swallow yours. "stop looking at me like that." you laugh, feeling small under his gaze. "like what?" patrick questions, knowing exactly where this about to lead. what should be guilt filling his body is replaced by pure lust. bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes float over your body, only now realising how small your dress is on your body. collarbones fully exposed, the fabric hitching up your thigh due to how you're sat on the couch. "like a meal. you look like you wanna eat me." his breath hitches, eyes moving back up your body to your eyes. holding your gaze, he places his glass down the coffee table next to him. following his movements, you do the same, leaning in towards him. "well, maybe i do want to taste you." patrick admits, his body moving towards you, eyes growing darker as the admission leaves his lips. the slow, gradual movements you're making towards each other feel like miles you have to travel. every second of inching closer feels like hours. every thought leaves your brain as patrick's hands grasp your cheeks and pull your lips onto his. mouths open, tongues sliding over each other, desperate to discover every part of each other's mouths.

patrick kisses feel like you're finally being kissed properly, as though no one before him had ever known how. his lips are soft, tongue hard against yours. his hands moving to your waist, pulling your body onto his lap. straddling his hips as your arms wrap around his neck, hopelessly trying to taste more of him. moving your lips down his jaw, licking and sucking at his skin down to his neck. "my god, you're so hot." patrick mumbles, head falling back, eyes fluttering closed as you nibble at the skin below his earlobe. pushing your head back to face him, eyes locked on each other, breathing heavy as his lips push against yours again. his hips bucking up against you, the harsh fabric of his jeans rubbing against the lace of your underwear. "we shouldn't.." you start, words falling into his mouth, lips barely leaving each others. patrick knows exactly what you mean, knows you want to help your ego, feel like you at least tried to not fuck him. "hmm, i don't care," patrick mumbles, his hands caressing every inch of your curves as yours move to bunch in his curls. trying desperately to pull yourself off of him but your body not allowing it, you're sucked in. he's like a drug, one taste and you're hooked. pushing yourself backwards from his lips, half-lidded eyes looking down to him, his hands holding you in place as you part your lips and whisper. "i want you."

his hands hook under your thighs, lifting you up as if you weigh nothing, legs instinctively wrapping around his body as patrick walks you both over to the bed. dropping you down, standing over you at the end of the bed. propping yourself onto your elbows, looking up patrick through your lashes, watching him pull his t-shirt over his head. "take it off." patrick instructs, unbuttoning his jeans, pulling down his zipper, his body overcome with desire. lifting your dress up your body from the hem, shimmying the fabric up over your chest, slipping it over your head as it's flung off the bed. laid before him as his jeans drop to the floor, matching red lace underwear adorn your skin. patrick's mouth slightly agape, still stood before you, taking in every inch of you. readjusting the tent in his boxers as he smirks down to you. "you gonna stand there staring all night, patrick? or are you gonna actually fuck me?" patrick groans at your words, hearing you verbally admit what you want from him. crawling over your body, your knees bent squeezing him into place, his hands at either side of your head. grinding himself down against you, legs spread waiting for him. leaning his head down to yours, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down as your eyes roll back.

moving one of his hands to your chest, holding himself up with one arm as the other gropes your boobs. pulling them out from your bra as you push the straps down your arms. grabbing your waist as patrick flips the two of you over, sitting you up on his lap as he undoes your bra, letting it fall down your arms before throwing it in the direction of your dress. knees either side of his hips, grinding against him, the friction causing quiet noises from the both of you. patrick's mouth moving down to wrap around your nipple, hands caressing both of your boobs. manhandling your chest as his teeth graze the skin of your nipple, hissing at the sensation. shoulders pushing back as your head falls with them, patrick's lips attacking your neck as he continues squeezing your breasts. surprising patrick as your hands wrap around his wrists, pushing him down against the bed, his arms above his head. grinding your hips down against him quicker, patrick struggling below you, attempting to escape from your grip but failing. bucking his hips up against you, desperate for some friction on his aching cock. "hmm, getting needy?" you fake pout, patrick sucking his teeth in response. his cock twitching against you, so unfamiliar with the competition for dominance. feeling you start to rearrange your grip around his wrists, he slips from your grasp, throwing you onto your back once more. pushing his boxers down his legs, hands snaking between your bodies to pull your panties down too. reaching down to slip his fingers into you, as his other hand pins both your wrists above your head. smirking down to you as his digits push in and out of your cunt, his thumb circling your clit. your back arched as moans escape you, moving your wrists in attempt to loosen his grip, but failing as he pushes your arms further into the mattress. "stop struggling."

the both of you had never been so desperate for something in your lives. both never felt so overcome with lust and desire, bodies in need of each other. the tension building becoming unbearable, the room filling with heavy breathing and moans. slipping his fingers out from you, wrapping his hand around his member. freeing you from his grip as he lifts your leg onto his shoulder, lining himself up with your entrance. eyes staring into each others, keeping you there for a minute, his cock teasing you as the suspense builds between you. "patrick, fuckin-" you start, words cut off as his thick cock pushes all the way inside you. lifting your other leg onto his shoulder now, fingers digging into your thighs as he wastes no time pounding in and out of you. screams of pleasure from you met with a smirk on patrick's mouth. "you were saying?" patrick teases, his lips kissing down your ankle. holding back your moans through gritted teeth, the sheets balled in your fists, patrick's dick hitting your g-spot with every thrust. your ass lifted from the mattress as patrick's speed increases. fucking you deeper than you've ever felt, seeing a bulge on your stomach every time he thrusts into you. he's hitting places inside your walls you've never experienced, eyes in the back of your head as your moans mix together as one. skin slaps echoing in the room, fingers moving to grasp patrick's thighs, nails digging into the skin. biting your lip through a smirk as you look up to the brunette. "hit me."

"god, you're dirty." patrick mumbles through moans, the request making his cock twitch inside you. dropping your legs down from his shoulders, pounding into you harder as his open hand smacks against the skin of your cheek. the sound that escapes you is sinful, patrick's hand wrapping around your throat. "agai-" you start, cut off by another slap across your face. his body falling onto yours, your legs wrapping around his waist. his hand still around your throat, the other gripping the skin on your hip. teeth nibbling on your earlobe, every sound he makes falling into your ear. fingers scratching down the skin of his spine, sharp nails drawing blood from his back, only to be met by groans from patrick. "jesus christ, where have you been all my life?" he mumbles, thrusts getting sloppy. moving his hand from your hip to reach between your sweaty bodies to circle your clit. feeling you become undone underneath his body, legs jolting as your ankles tighten around him. his hand gripping your throat tighter as he feels you cum over his cock. circling you through your high before slipping his fingers from your skin. hands either side of your shoulders, pushing himself up as his hips slap against yours. "i'm on the pill," you start, struggling to speak through the sensations. "cum inside me, patrick, please."

his cock slaps against your g-spot once more as he paints your walls white, cursing his way through his orgasm. collapsing against you as his dick slips out from inside of you. the sweat from your bodies sticking the two of you together as you both come back down to earth, calming your breathing and dropping your legs down from around his body. peppering the side of your face in kisses before moving to the side of you on the bed. staring at the ceiling in silence for a few minutes as you both recover. breaking the silence once your breathing as returned to a normal pace. "we can't do that again." patrick scoffs, brown curls sticking to his skin. "we're doing that again as soon as physically possible." his head turning to look at you, following suit and looking into his half-lidded eyes. "that was the best sex of my life. i'm not giving that up anytime soon." patrick half laughs, making you giggle and shake your head. "you're gonna get me in so much trouble, zweig." patrick moves to bite down on your earlobe. "i think you're already in trouble."

you and patrick are playing most of the same tournaments on tour, meaning even if you wanted to avoid him and let the guilt wash over you, you couldn't. wanting to avoid him very quickly turns into falling into his bed every night you can. any idea of guilt or remorse is lost the second that smirk appears on his lips and the number of his room is text to you during the first day of the tournament. patrick fucks you like no other, both of you obsessed with the others touch. the others ability to turn each other on with just a look, just a thought. all patrick has to do is let his mind wander and all he can hear is 'hit me' and he's hard during practise. and that's the other issue, the lines are getting thinner. you've started helping each other with your games' during off days, playing practise matches together and hitting up bars after. what two months ago was a mindless fuck one night, has turned into hours of conversations and time spent together. lucky for you both, there hasn't been any major tournament's on the tour yet, ones that family and friends would request to attend. so you haven't had to worry about anyone you know noticing the amount of time you spend in each others pockets. other athlete's have of course noticed, but most are none the wiser or simply don't care. you're both becoming more needy for each other, more desperate for touch when you should resist. patrick making excuses, criticising your backhand to be able to jog across the court and touch the skin of your body to help your game. the addiction to each other growing stronger, harder to ignore and act like you're not doing anything wrong. it's easier to rationalise if it's said to be just sex, lying to yourself that you're lonely and horny on tour, needing someone to scratch the itch while your partner is far, far away from you. that would be easy, if it was just sex.

laying together, bodies tangled together as some old tv show plays from the screen in the hotel you're currently in. clothes spread across the floor, both naked as you lay together, patrick drawing circles on your shoulder, cigarette in the corner of his mouth. "you've improved a lot since the start of tour." patrick compliments, flicking the ash into the empty can on the nightstand. you have, every free minute you have you spend either on the courts or in patrick's bed. it's hard to be distracted by loneliness on tour if you're not lonely. "thanks, maybe it's because you're helping me." you half laugh, stealing the cigarette from him, inhaling and placing it back between his lips. patrick laughs lightly at your answer, he's gotten better too. he knows if there's free time you'll be on the courts, so naturally goes too. the stillness in the room is interrupted by your phone ringing, a picture of your boyfriend lighting the screen. "fuck." you mumble, escaping from patrick's grasp. rushing around the room, picking up a t-shirt from the floor and brushing down your hair. sitting in the corner of the room on an armchair, you answer the facetime call. "hey baby." you can see patrick roll his eyes as he puts the cigarette out in the can, slipping his boxers back onto his body. "yeah, final tomorrow, feeling good. how's home?" patrick watches you from the edge of the bed, seeing you bring your knees up to your chest, brushing against the fabric of his t-shirt you've slipped on. his eyes darken as he notices your exposed cunt, clearly not having had time to put your panties back on. his eyes grow dark, a devilish idea taking over his brain.

he can barely concentrate on what you're saying, not that he cares what lies you're telling your boyfriend, just curious. "i know, i wish you were here too." okay, that one slipped through. a quiet scoff leaves his lips. leaning down from the bed, falling onto all fours as patrick starts crawling across the floor over to you. your eyes darting to him and that signature smirk across his face, hiding any reaction from slipping through facetime. "yeah, us open in a couple weeks so i'll be able to see you then." you smile, trying to ignore patrick on his route to you. kneeling before you, his hands spreading your ankles, your elbows resting on your knees as you hold your phone. muting the call quickly and whispering down to patrick. "don't you dare." what was meant to deter him only spurs him on. unmuting the call before your boyfriend noticing, him still explaining his excitement for the tournament. legs spread open before patrick's face, his tongue licking a line up through your folds. gritting your teeth as you desperately attempt to focus on the call, trying to push patrick's head away, with no success. covering your reaction to patrick's mouth wrapping around your clit with a cough, breathing deeply through your nose. "yeah, i've already got your tickets all worked out, don't worry." your words come out stuttered, you can feel the smile from patrick against your cunt. licking and lapping you up, one hand grasping the hairs at his scalp.

a slight moan escapes you, trying to cover with another cough, met with questions from your boyfriend. "yeah, sorry, i'm fine, just a tickle in my throat." you lie as two of patrick's fingers insert themselves into you, breath hitching at the sensation. "so yeah, the driver will pick you up from the airport and i'll meet you at the hotel when you arrive." you attempt to continue conversation, the feeling in your stomach growing stronger as patrick's tongue draws shapes over your clit, wetness dripping down his chin. feeling his hot breath on your cunt, faint sounds of his fingers thrusting into you. "baby, i gotta go, got practise in half an hour, i'll call you tomorrow." you rush out your words, not letting him say bye before hanging up and throwing your phone down. head flinging back as loud moans leave you, both hands moving to patrick's curls now. "jesus, patrick, you're gonna kill me." you hear him laugh against you, the vibrations flowing through you as he does. he sloppily makes out with your wetness, finally letting the moans fall into the room, making his fingers move faster. his curls tickling your thighs as they clench around his head, bucking your hips up, grinding your clit against his nose. eyes rolling into the back of your head as your orgasm sends shock waves through your body, holding his head in place as you ride it out. loosening him from your grip as you stop seeing stars.

"patrick-" you start, his chin dripping in drool and sticky from your wetness, about to tell him off. "you fucking love it." he cuts you off, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. shaking your head as patrick pushes onto the armchair you're sat on, moving your body onto his lap, his arm around your waist. "plus, it was very fucking hot." he mumbles as his lips crash onto yours, pulling you as close to his body as possible. "you're gonna get us caught one of these days." you regretted the words as soon as they left your mouth, you and patrick never discussed the idea of admitting what you were doing, not like he hadn't just gone down on you while on the phone to your boyfriend. but admitting you could get caught meant admitting one day it would have to stop, that you'd have to accept that it was wrong and immoral and totally against your values. that you were hurting people that you cared about for the sake of your own pleasure. "so fucking what?" patrick's response surprised you, his hand wrapping around your throat as he pulled your face back down onto his lips. you were scared of getting caught, petrified, you assumed patrick was too. you both cared deeply about your relationships despite the fact you were cheating, so patrick's answer threw you off guard slightly. pushing the thought to the back of your head as your body was lifted to the air and thrown against the bed, giggling as patrick pulled you to the edge of the bed, slipping off his boxers as he flips you onto your stomach. so fuck drunk from patrick's cock that you thought yeah, so what if you got caught, so fucking what?

things carry on the same way up to the us open, both you and patrick looking like strong contenders on your sides of the competition. both dreading the change in dynamic between you once partners arrive to support you during the two weeks of the tournament. sitting on the side of the courts, both breathless after the practise you'd done. "when does he arrive?" patrick asks, chugging down the most part of his water bottle. "three hours, you?" you return, sweat dropping from your skin. "four. we still have the hotel rooms we get assigned, you know?" patrick smirks to you, throwing a tennis ball back and forth in his hands. you were both planning on staying with your partners, in their hotels separate from the tournament. all players are put up in a hotel together during any stops on the tour, you and patrick had stayed there the night previous before both partners arrived today. "patrick, that really is playing with fire." packing away your things, standing up to collect stray tennis balls about the court as patrick begins to help. "we could just say we have commitments, press, practise, whatever." he shrugs, unwilling to accept he'll have to go two weeks without touching you. "we can still see each other, for lunch and things like that." you suggest, putting the balls into the crate, tidying it off to the side with your things. "not the same." he mumbles, sulking as he too puts his rackets back into their bag. "oh boohoo, we knew this would happen." slinging your bags onto shoulders, patrick grabbing the crate of balls and heading inside. "quickie before they arrive then?" you laugh as he follows you down the hall. "please?"

you'd become more open talking about partners, not experiences or what they were like, but in relation to your own relationship with patrick. you'd stopped pretending they didn't exist, more accepting of the fact you and patrick were sneaking around behind their backs. especially with knowing they'd be so close to each other, and to the two of you, aware of the fact you could cross paths with patrick's girlfriend or vice versa. after cleaning up in patrick's hotel room, patrick showering with you before you darted off to your partners hotel, meeting him in the lobby. swept up into affection and care by him, brushing off the idea of sex with an 'i'm tired'. the two of you catching up about your time apart while getting ready for the party held at the start of the tournament, being held at the players' hotel. introducing your partner to some of the female athletes you'd met and played against during the tour, sharing drinks and nibbling on the snacks brought around. his arm snaked around your waist as you mingled through the party, holding in the uncomfortable way his hands made you feel. standing around a table with him and a few other players and their families, spotting those familiar curls bouncing into the big hall. girl to his side, not touching her, her big eyes looking up to him as they entered. his eyes immediately finding yours as he can't hold back the smile forming on his lips.

walking towards you, drink in hand as the two of them slot into your group. stunned at his openness, swallowing down the frog in your throat as patrick says his hellos. "aren't you going to introduce me?" he taunts you, elbowing your side as he slots in next to you, his girlfriend to his left. extending his hand to your boyfriend, you calm yourself and introduce the two of them. "this is patrick zweig, he's been help-" you start to explain a reason for his need for introduction. "we've been helping each other, during the tour." you wish you could slap the smirk off of his face, your boyfriend none the wiser smiles and shakes his hand. "aren't you going to introduce me then, too?" you poke back, moving your head to look to his girlfriend, sweet smile disguising your true feelings. patrick introduces the two of you, further explaining your relationship, for reasons you wish he wouldn't. "yeah as i said, we've been helping each other a lot. she's made me a much better player." your fakeness dissipates, a true smile on your face at patrick's kindness. "me too." you return, the others in your group disbanding, leaving the four of you alone. "sounds like you've gotten close then." your oh so naive boyfriend smiles, arm still resting on the small of your back. "yeah, we definitely have." patrick smiles into his drink, throat bobbing as he finishes the drink. "if you'll excuse us, i owe this one a drink for thrashing me today." patrick smiles, leading you to the bar away from your partners', his hand replacing your boyfriends'.

"getting me alone already? you only saw me six hours ago." you laugh, met with a side eye from patrick as he leans onto the bar, ordering you both a drink. "i don't know how i'm gonna go two weeks like this." he admits. "did you have sex with him?" patrick leans down, whispering the question to you. you simply shake your head in response, receiving your drink from the bartender. "did you?" you find it harder to ask than you should. "nah, why would i when i have you?" patrick winks to you as he walks back over to your partners, guiding his girlfriend over to a table to sit. collecting yourself you walk back over to your boyfriend. "he seems nice." he starts. "did you give him that t-shirt?" he asks you, looking over to patrick, following his gaze you look to his outfit before turning back to your boyfriend, brows furrowed at the question. "you were wearing it on facetime the other week. you must shop at the same places!" he laughs, sipping his drink, turning away as the blush creeps up your cheeks, suddenly very grateful for your very naive boyfriend.

spending the night sharing secret glances at patrick, him doing the same every chance he gets. the night starting to draw to a close, witnessing patrick hug his girlfriend at the door. expecting them to leave, but only she does, patrick locking eyes with you from the exit. signalling his head upwards, towards the rooms upstairs in the hotel. shaking your head to him, lips upturned, patrick just nodding in response before darting off. hearing your phone ping from your purse, hiding the screen from your partner, who's too engaged in conversation to even notice.

patrick: come on, u know u want to ;)

that boy will be the death of you, you think. unable to go more than half a day without touching you, breathing deeply, thinking how you're going to go two weeks like this, hiding and risking getting caught for half an hour of each others time.

patrick: i need youuu

patrick's text chimes through again, rolling your eyes to the phone. interrupting your partner's conversation explaining you need to pack up the things you left in your room ready for press tomorrow, that you'll meet him back at his hotel later. "sure babe." his lips press against your cheek, a pinch of guilt under your skin, lying to his face like this. the remorse was a lot easier to ignore when he wasn't around. chewing the inside of your cheek as you enter the elevator up to patrick's floor, any idea of wrongdoing washing away as the tension builds up in your body. knocking lightly on his door, it opening within seconds of the sound. patrick's smile welcomes you in, pulling you into his arms the second the door is closed. "i missed you." he whispers into your skin, wet kisses placed all over your face. "you literally just saw me." you laugh into his frame, arms around his neck. "but i couldn't touch you." patrick pouts, wasting no time placing your lips against his. his big hands grabbing at your back, claiming the skin as his. walking your bodies to the edge of the bed, sitting together, lips not parting from each others for even a second. hands roaming each other, pulling and squeezing at fabric and skin. breathing each other in as your head feels light, getting your fix of your addiction.

"we don't have long, patrick." you mumble into his mouth, fiddling with the curls on his head. "that's okay, i just wanted to kiss you." you swear your heart stops beating for a second. he didn't even want sex, just a kiss from you. so needy for you that going half a day without a kiss would have been too much for him. you can feel the lines of the relationship thinning even more, trying to rationalise the cheating as just sex. it would be too wrong if you and patrick caught feelings for each other, it would cross the boundaries of culpability. you just liked spending time together, sleeping together, playing tennis together. there were no feelings involved, or at least admitted by either of you anyway. but hearing patrick tell you he orchestrated this current situation, sneaking away from your partners during a party, just to kiss you, made goosebumps form on your arms. melting into him further as his mouth swallowed yours. pulling away from his face, placing a kiss to the tip of his nose. "are you going soft on me, zweig?" you joke, arms still wrapped around each other. "oh sorry for wanting a kiss." he teases back, letting himself be slightly vulnerable with you. he would have been happy just sat holding your hand in this hotel room, anything to be close to you. patrick feels a specific calmness when in your company, a sensation that takes over him whenever you're close. he craves it, any time he's away from your skin.

patrick was more open with himself about his feelings in regards to your relationship, he knew that lines had already been crossed and there was no going back, for him anyway. he also knew you hadn't registered that idea yet, knew you were still refusing to accept that this was anything more than sex. you didn't act like that's all it was to you, but it's what helped you sleep at night. patrick often thought about breaking up with his girlfriend, he hadn't been with her too long before you anyway. patrick was more scared of the rejection he could face from you than breaking up with her. he knew if he were to leave her, it would be for you, and he couldn't handle the idea of you telling him no. telling him you wouldn't leave your boyfriend, for so now, he kept things the same, thinking he'd rather have you in some way than not at all. to you, ending your relationship wasn't an option, not yet anyway. you could handle being alone, waiting for patrick, but leaving your partner would make things messy. mean accepting the truth and having to admit to someone outside of you and patrick. it would mean accepting your wrongdoings and taking blame, making what you and patrick were doing wrong, and part of you could never view your relationship with patrick as wrong. he was like no other, made you feel like no other, and that feeling in your chest could never been told as wrong.

kissing patrick once more, near enough empty duffle bag hanging from your shoulder as you left the hotel with him, heading in separate directions to your partners hotels. your boyfriend in bed asleep by the time you enter, changing into an oversized t-shirt, patrick's of course, not that you noticed it was his. facing away from your partner, face buried into your phone, staying up late texting patrick all through the night.

patrick: can't sleep without u next to me anymore

your lip is constantly between your teeth, chewing at the softness, spinning your head around checking on your sleeping boyfriend periodically. you and patrick shared a bed most nights during tour, in either of your hotel rooms, falling asleep in each others arms, drifting off to the sound of calm breathing.

you: ur gonna have dark circles for press tomorrow, go to sleep!!

patrick holds back a chuckle, phone not leaving his head, his only way to feel close to you. knowing your on the other side of the screen, typing back to him as quick as he is you.

patrick: so are you, goodnight gorgeous

sending back your own goodnight message, finally locking your phone, tossing and turning your way to sleep.

getting dressed after breakfast with your boyfriend, white dress skort and matching tank slick to your skin, packing your bags before ubering to the venue. "i would have picked you up." you hear from patrick as you close the door to your uber, slinging your bags over your shoulders as he locks his car. "and that would have been really subtle, wouldn't it?" you laugh, leading you both into the venue. "that's why i made a point of telling our partners how well we get on, stupid." he teases you, jabbing his elbow into your side, met with an eye roll from you. "so we can still spend time together without any questions." you respond, realising patrick's reason for the introductions last night. "duh. i'll drive you back later." his words are more instructions than an offering, the two of you dropping off your things in the locker rooms. putting another layer of powder on your face, patrick leaving a soft kiss to your exposed shoulder. batting him away, grateful for the empty room. the two of you ready yourselves for press, walking over to the media rooms where multiple promotion screens are placed around the room. patrick is pulled into an interview, standing to the left of him as you await your turn. "you've definitely improved this season, patrick, why do you think that is? any new members to your team?" you hear patrick's interviewer ask him and you get mic'ed up by a member of the press. his gaze lands on you before quickly returning to the interviewer, camera blinking as he answers the question. "no new members no, i've been practising a lot with someone new though, it must be helping." patrick's arms folded on his chest, signature smirk down the camera as the interviewer pushes for more, hearing your name leave patrick's lips. "we've been playing in all the same tournaments, so we've been spending a lot of time together." this interviewers eyes move to you, hopeful to bring you into frame, getting a new scoop for his sports channel.

"come on," patrick states, pulling you over to his interview. cheeks slightly flushed as he does. "we had noticed your improvement too," the interviewer starts, stating your name before continuing. "is that also due to your time with patrick?" considering your answer carefully before responding. "yeah, patrick's been great, it's like having a second coach while we play." you laugh, a chuckle from patrick too. "i'm really grateful for sure." smiling over to patrick, holding his gaze for slightly too long before returning to the camera. "so i assume you're both rooting for each other during this tournament?" the interviewer continues, reshuffling his notes, the two of you nodding immediately. "definitely, i go to all of her matches that i can and she's always at mine." the interviewer asks a few more questions before thanking patrick and carrying on with your individual interview. wrapping up and returning the mic, you and patrick head for lunch in the players food hall. "i can't believe you." you laugh, stabbing your food onto your fork and bringing it to your mouth. patrick's ankle leaning against yours under the table. "what? he asked me a question so i told the truth, you are the reason i've improved." patrick mumbles through full mouth, shaking your head at him, his leg rubbing against yours. "you're making it so obvious though." you return, patrick shrugging as he sips on his gatorade. "can men and women not be friends?" he jokes. "so we're friends are we?"

patrick laughs as he cuts up his food. "you're my best friend, among other things." you so badly want to press, ask him for specifics, know how he views you and your relationship. but you don't, very aware of the amount of bodies around you, you drop the subject. finishing up your food, the two of you head back to the dressing room, readying yourselves to leave for the day. "i just wanna have a shower and get changed." you smile, pulling a towel and spare clothes from your bag, walking over to the private shower cubicle. placing your towel and clothes on the hook, undressing and slipping under the water. sighing as the warm water drips down your skin. washing the soap down the drain as you stand there still for a short while, before the handle of the cubicle moves and patrick closes the door behind you. "patrick, i swear." you laugh quietly, watching him remove his own clothes and place them on the hook. joining you under the water as his hands wrap around your waist. "what? i can leave if you really want." patrick mumbles into your neck as the water falls over you both. melting into his grip as you pull him down to your lips. reaching between you both to stroke his exposed cock, already hard at the sight of you. quiet groans fall into your mouth as you pump him between your bodies.

in one movement, patrick spins you round, your chest pushed against the cold tiles. hands up against the wall beside your head, ass pushed out towards him. patrick kicks your ankles open, hitting his dick against you before sliding in. his hand moving around you, wrapping around your mouth to hold in your moans. his free hand gripping your hip as he pounds into your cunt, your head falling back onto his shoulder. your bodies sliding together with ease from the warm water covering you both. "you're so fucking perfect, baby, my god." patrick mutters into your ear, not caring about the sound of his hips hitting against your ass as he slips in and out of you. peppering the side of your face and neck in wet kisses, lightly biting at the skin on your earlobe. the publicness and ability to get caught only spurring you both on, the band in your stomach being stretched further with every thrust of his cock inside your walls. "patrick, fuck- m'gonna cum." you mumble through his fingers. "show, don't tell." patrick instructs, hand slipping from your mouth to your throat. tightening his grip on the sides as he feels you clench around his cock. drawing blood from your bottom lip as you attempt to hold in the sounds forming in your throat. patrick's grip moving to your waist, holding you up as your body jolts around him. "good girl."

patrick pounds into you harder, pulling your ass backwards to meet him in the middle of every thrust. his short nails digging into the skin of your hips as he pushes into you once more, filling you up with his cum as his head falls onto your shoulder. holding himself inside of you as the two of you calm your breathing together. whining at the emptiness once he slips out of you, the water washing away any remaining proof of sex as patrick turns you around, holding you in his arms. "you've ruined sex for me forever, no one will ever compare." patrick laughs lightly to you, foreheads pressed against each other. "maybe you'll just have to keep having sex with me forever then." something you'd never say if you weren't coming down from your fuck high, a genuine smile forms on patrick's face at your words. "sounds good to me." turning off the shower as you both dry yourself on your towel, getting dressed and letting patrick leave the cubicle first, following after a few minutes later. the two of you grabbing your things and heading over to his car, starting the drive back to your hotel. "how's it going, with him?" patrick asks, one hand on the wheel, the other resting on your thigh. chewing the inside of your lip as you respond. "it's fine, he's clearly missed me as he's all over me," patrick sharply inhales at the idea of someone else touching your skin, kissing your lips, trying to downplay his reaction as he keeps driving. "but it's draining, very grateful for all the press and parties and practise to distract me." you continue, placing your hand over the top of his on your leg, wrapping your fingers around his. "what about you, with her?"

"luckily she knows a lot of people here, so she's got plans all the time that don't include me. but i just miss you most of the time." patrick squeezes your thigh. hiding your smile from him, hiding any form of admission of feelings slipping through. lifting his hand up to your lips, placing a soft kiss to his palm. leaning your face into his hand as he looks over to you during a red light. "i miss you too." your cheeks are flushed slightly, placing his hand back down on your thigh. "are we terrible people?" you laugh, readjusting to sit cross legged on the passenger seat, his hand still resting on your inner thigh. "maybe, but you know, you can't help how you feel." patrick states, looking to the road as he drives down the street. how you feel. the words linger in your mind, wanting to assume he means how he feels about sleeping with you, knowing neither of you can resist each other. but his words trigger something within you, you finally realise. sitting here in his car, caressing each others skin so carelessly, so naturally, you realise that have feelings for patrick. you like the way he smells after a tennis match, how he always has to be touching your skin, how he looks at you. your breathing increasing in pace, looking over to him as your mind keeps running. you love the way he says your name, how he always brings you a glass of water when you're thirsty, how he ties your shoelaces for you when they come undone. mouth slightly agape, wondering if he too feels the same.

the guilt washes over you when you leave patrick's car, arriving at your hotel. after two months of patrick and no remorse, it all hits you now. it was easier to ignore when it was just sex, but on one random car journey, it hits you like a ton of bricks. you've caught feelings for patrick zweig. heading to the hotel bar, ordering a drink and sitting alone on a table by the window, collecting your thoughts. fiddling with your lower lip, deep in thought, feeling the cut on your skin. shit. you drew blood holding in your noises in the shower, and now have to develop a lie to tell your boyfriend. shaking your head at yourself, truly now feeling like a terrible person. it's only now that you consider the fact that you'll of course have to break up with him. how could you possibly look at him the same knowing he'll never be patrick? he'll never make your heart skip a beat with just a smirk, never touch you like him, never make you feel like patrick does. the guilt almost consumes you, hoping the alcohol will numb some of the pain. snapping out of your obsessive thoughts to the sound of your phone pinging.

patrick: already can't wait to see u tomorrow

eyes fluttering closed, a sea of butterflies filling up your stomach at the words on your screen from patrick. how could you not see it? how could you not realise you were falling for him, knowing he was your first thought every morning and the last at every night.

you: me too baby <3

you text each other like lovers, as though if anyone could read your messages or see the way you are alone together, they'd assume you were deeply in love. finishing your drink, you start the dreaded walk up to your shared hotel room. unlocking the door, your boyfriend sat on the couch watching tv. seeing his teethy grin spread across his face as you walk into the room. more guilt. it's like your body is punishing you for all the days you didn't feel any remorse, you're feeling it all built up now. every inch of your body filled with the feeling. you're so angry at yourself, for one, letting it go this far with patrick without seeing the signs, but two, not accepting the fact that what you were doing was wrong. so wrong, so unforgivable, you were hurting someone so deeply and never even giving it a second thought. and the worst part about it was that you knew full well, you'd be all over patrick the second you got him alone tomorrow.

things stayed the same until the day before the quarter finals, both you and patrick advancing to that stage. seeing each other every chance you could before going home to your partners and acting like everything was fine. you had a day off before the quarter final, getting in some practise with your coach in the morning before spending the rest of the day off. entering your hotel room, showering and slipping into a hoodie and shorts. joining your boyfriend on the couch, turning off the tv and sitting to face him, him doing the same. "i need to talk to you about something." you knew it was time, your feelings had been eating you up. you'd barely been eating or sleeping, too focused on the guilt of the taste of patrick lingering on your mouth as you kissed your boyfriend goodnight. "okay." he smiles to you, still none the wiser. "i'm breaking up with you." you finally let out the words, fiddling with the hem of your hoodie, just about able to look him in the eyes. watching his body slump slowly, his eyes glossing over. "why?" he asks you, his words shaky but calm, not shouting or arguing, just wanting to know the reasons why. "i have feelings for someone else, it's nothing you did, it just happened. i'm so sorry." your bottom lip is between your teeth, so ashamed to be admitting the truth, but part of you grateful, the guilt finally dissipating. "who?" he returns, through gritted teeth. "are you sure you want to know?" you ask, hoping he wouldn't. he simply nods his head, feeling you owe him the answers to any of his questions, you tell him. he scoffs as he hears patrick's name fall from your lips. "god, i'm so naive. have you fucked him?" his sudden harshness takes you back, pulling your knees up to your chest, your eyes now glossing over, nodding your head. "wow." is all that comes back to you.

the two of you sit in silence for a short while, before he finally stands. "well, i'm sorry too, that i couldn't be what you wanted. does his girlfriend know?" he asks, pacing around the room. "i don't know, i don't think so." you respond, standing now too. "christ, how many people did you need to hurt?" his words cut you like a knife, immediately starting to pack up the things of yours in the room. "i'm gonna go, i'm so sorry, i never meant to hurt anyone." he half scoffs at your words, opening the door for you as you bunch your belongings under your arms, walking out the door. both of you saying final goodbyes and leaving each other for the last time. dragging all your bags into your uber, you rush to the hotel the players are assigned to. tears finally falling from your eyes once you enter the room. letting yourself feel every feeling you've held in for the past few weeks, losing yourself to emotion as they all come pouring out of you.

cleaning yourself up after a few hours, texting patrick and asking him to come to your hotel. he shows up half an hour later, knocking on your door. pulling him into the room, pulling his lips to yours as the two of you fall onto the bed. pulling himself from you as the two of you sit on the edge of the bed. "what's wrong? you look like you've been crying." he asks, placing a soft kiss to your temple. "i broke up with him." patrick's mouth falls open slightly in reaction. his mind running quicker than he can keep up with. not able to focus on one particular thought, he rushes out his words. "why did you do that?" he's harsher than he would have liked, not being able to focus hard enough to properly form sentences he would rather say. shocked you move slightly further away from his grip. "you, patrick. you're why." neither of you had ever admitted any feelings to each other, you'd barely admitted them to yourselves, let alone sharing them. but those words leaving your lips were all the admission patrick needed. he was very aware he felt the same, but he also knew that it would be too good to be true. patrick was prone to self-sabotage, he did it to protect himself from getting hurt in the long run. "i never asked you to do that." it's almost involuntary the harsh tone in which he's speaking, deep down he wants nothing more than to kiss you and run home to break off his own relationship to be with you. but his mind is singlehandedly running his ability to consider that an actual option in this scenario.

"i know you didn't." nearly matching his tone as you try to distract yourself from the tears welling up in your eyes. "i just thought.." trailing off as your words soften. "you thought what? that we'd dump our partners and run off into the sunset?" you can't believe the words coming from him, never has he been so harsh to you, so cold. "no i just, i thought you liked me." your eyes unable to look at him anymore, a single tear dropping onto the mattress from your eyes. "it's not that easy. this just complicates it even more. i never told you i'd break up with my girlfriend." patrick wishing he could stop himself, slap himself out of it and realise what he was doing. but he couldn't, couldn't pause and consider what he was pushing away. "why are you being like this?" you respond, words so quiet as you meet his gaze again. "we're just sleeping together, okay? was that not enough for you?" patrick standing up from the bed, his voice slightly raised. his words cutting through your skin like a knife, shaking your head slightly, unable to stop the tears now. "just leave patrick, please." your words shaky, lip quivering. "whatever." he leaves with a slam of the door. falling onto your back on the bed, crying out any remaining tears as your body curls up into a ball.

waking up to the sun rising the next morning, sadness turned to anger in the night spent alone. focusing all of your energy onto the match you were playing later today, jumping out of bed with a point to prove. soothing your puffy eyes and hiding your dark circles with light make-up. ubering to the venue and getting in a few hours with your hitting partner before readying yourself for your match. luckily avoiding patrick, who's match was happening at the same time as yours. sitting in your private dressing room, leg bouncing as you wait for the call to head to the court.

patrick: good luck champ

a text from patrick only spurs your anger more, ignoring the message and cracking your neck. the knock comes shortly after, slinging your racket bag over your shoulder as you walk down the hall. white dress with built in shorts standing opposite your opponent, bouncing side to side as the match starts. letting all of your anger out on the court, heavy grunts escaping you. your emotions fuelling your game as you win the first two sets, screaming out at your win. earning your place in the semi finals, asking your coach quickly about patrick's match. "third set is just starting, he won the first." rushing your way through your post match interview on the court, catching the end of patrick's match from the tunnel of the players entrance. arms folded, watching intently as you witness patrick fumble the final set. looking on as patrick's racket is smacked against the ground repeatedly, clearly frustrated with his loss. the racket is thrown across the court as he begrudgingly shakes the hand of his competitor. smirking from the sidelines as he picks up his bag, walking in your direction. slowing down slightly as he reaches you. he can tell you won just by the smug smile on your face as you stare him down. his big hands grabbing hold of your forearm as he drags you down the tunnel with him towards his dressing room.

struggling to free yourself from his grip as he slams the door behind you both. "what the fuck are you doing?" you shout, pushing him away from you once in the private space. the anger he felt on the court lifting as a devilish smirk spreads across his face. heavy hands cupping your face as his lips crash onto yours. hopelessly trying to push him off but not succeeding, your body desperate for your fix of him. your bodies fight against each other, pushing and pulling one another around the room, fighting for control. crashing into lockers and walls, tongues swirling around mouths. patrick pushing off all the items on the table in the corner, lifting you up to sit on the edge, pulling his tank over his head. grabbing the hem of your dress, attempting to pull it over your body but failing. "why can't i get this fucking thing off?" he struggles again, letting you slip it down yourself. "the shorts are built in." you half laugh at his frustration, fingers scratching down the skin of his arms. "stupid fucking thing." he laughs, lips attaching to yours again as he pushes his shorts and boxers down his legs. hooking his fingers around your underwear to pull them down, discarding them on the floor beneath you. pulling you further to the edge of the table as he pushes himself into you immediately, bottoming out. the table banging against the wall as he pounds into you, any anger left over working through his body to fuck you harder than he ever has.

bruising the skin on your hips as his hands dig in, slapping his crotch against yours. legs wrapping around his waist, ankles crossed behind his back. moans swallowed by each other in the sloppy kisses, foreheads pressed together as your nails scratch the length of his spine. "feel so fucking good baby." patrick mumbles into your neck, sucking on the skin. sweat dripping down your bodies, hair sticking to skin, his musk filling your nose. biting down on his shoulder as his hands slip underneath your ass, carrying you to the wall, your back pushed against it. your spine hitting against the cold wall with every thrust, his hands massaging the fat of your ass as he bucks his hips upwards into you at raw speed. his grasp on your skin pushing you up and down with his thrusts, bouncing on his cock as his tip hits your g-spot. the grip you have around his neck tightening as his thrusts grow sloppy, skin slapping echoing around the room as heavy groans fill the empty space. without warning his cum shoots into you, a drawn out groan leaving his lips as he pushes his weight onto you against the wall. slowly unwrapping your legs from his waist as he pulls out of you and places you on the floor. his body still weighing against you, his face nestled in your hair as you return to reality. throwing a towel down on the bench in the room, patrick sits and pulls you onto his lap. feeling his cock twitch as his hard on starts to calm, soft kisses placed on your face.

sitting there for a few minutes, before standing up to clean yourself up and get dressed. patrick following suit, cleaning up the table slightly. you're ready long before he is, waiting for him to slip his tank back onto his body. "don't you need to go find your girlfriend?" you tease, aiming to make him uncomfortable, seeking some revenge for his behaviour last night. you're expecting a laugh, a smirk, anything, but all he does is tense up. "don't talk about her." he whispers through gritted teeth. you're taken back, his words are harsh, protective, not like how he usually speaks. "i-i thought-" you start, rushing out words in attempt to understand. "i'm still with her." he spits out, the words hitting your chest as if he stabbed them into your skin. "i'm not breaking up with her, okay? you need to get that into your head." you've never heard patrick so harsh, so pointed. the thoughts are spinning around your mind, making you lightheaded. patrick was unable to stop himself, his self-sabotaging and attempts to protect himself from possible risk winning out. "if you want me, this is what you get. i'm not leaving her, not for you, not for anyone." your body is slumping, legs giving out on you as you fall onto the bench below you. all the words, all the affection, every glimpse of feeling patrick has ever showed you slowly slipping away as this unemotional version of him appears in his place. "it's second best, or nothing at all." his chest rising and falling as he looks to you.

patrick was different. he made you feel things no one ever had, made you feel electric. looking up to him through half-lidded eyes, breathing out sharply. both of you knowing you'd never be able to say no to him. you'd rather have him in some way than not at all. a single tear threatens to fall as you whisper.

"second best it is."

[nereidprinc3ss]

okay i know this is kind of a specific request but can you do something with professor Spence and uni reader where they get into a spat and argue bc she did something stupid and he gets mad and she’s like “noooo pls don’t be mad i hate when you’re mad at me I’m sorry🥺” bc she literally cannot function knowing she let him down (me with everybody) but he’s like super stubborn and goes all closed up and quiet so that he doesn’t like blow up on her until she finally says like “pls talk to me” and he’s all pissed and like “hell na bitch u crazy!🗣️‼️” but then later he’s like “it’s ok i love u but neva do that shit again ho” then they make up and it’s good again 🎀 ok i explained that so poorly (and comedically if i may) but i hope u get it and pls make it SO DRAMATIC bc I live for drama! like she steals test answers or something or does something that could like get her kicked out of school OR him lose his job 🤔 sigh … idk I’m leaving now. Also i LOOPOOOCE ORRKGOOVI love your fics. Luv em

hey girl (gender neutral) this made me laugh bc genuinely sometimes i write spencer so ooc that is what he sounds like. and i'm not sorry! anyway this is potentially a vyvanse fueled nightmare but i wrote it and i'm posting it MY BLOG MY RULES BITCHESSSS!!!! but genuinely read the content warning LMAO this one got a lil kick to it

warnings/tags: ANGST, HURT/COMFORT, fem!reader, spencer and r get into a for real argument like they're mean to each other, spencer is a lil toxic but its resolved, emotionally neglects reader just for a teeensy second but then he's really nice and sweet again, discussion of his past addic+ion, gets fluffy because i'm not EVIL, gets suggestive at the end bc i am secretly evil.......

a/n: i don't know whats happening. this confuses me just as much as it confuses you. its 3 am in the morning. im gonna post nice happy things soon. Gootbye

“I cannot believe you right now. I don’t even—I don’t even know what to say.” 

“Spencer, you don’t have to say anything. It has nothing to do with you, and I’m not looking for your approval.” 

He looks up from where he’d been rubbing his temples, like you’re a headache, eyebrows raised and lips parted in indignant disbelief. 

“Oh! You’re not looking for my approval? Well thank god for that, because if you were one of my students I would recommend expulsion to the board.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me? I just said I don’t care about your opinion on this, much less your hypothetical opinion from some alternate universe where you have any authority over my education whatsoever.” 

“You distributed an answer key to half of your class! Objectively this is the kind of thing that gets people expelled. I don’t understand how someone so smart could do something so fucking stupid.” 

The words bite more than you were prepared for—but what hurts even more is how much he seems to mean them. In arguments past you’d both said things you didn’t mean, and then would immediately melt into I’m so sorry’s and the fight would resolve itself. Spencer’s clenched jaw and inability to make eye contact with you do not lend themselves to tender apologies. They cannot be attributed to miscommunication. 

You take a step closer to where he’s bracing himself against the countertop, arms crossed defensively in front of your chest. 

“Spencer, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was such a big deal. People cheat in college all the time.” 

Still no reply. His head shakes so minutely you wonder if you’re imagining it. Panic wells in your chest. 

“Please talk to me. I really hate when you ice me out. I’m sorry, okay? Just... please say something.” 

Finally, his eyes slide to you. They lack the fiery anger of moments ago but there’s not much softness there either. His normally warm gaze now feels too abrasive, too cold and sharp on your bare skin. You're exposed, much too soft for that grating look, and it feels like he can see everything that’s wrong with you. 

“Believe me when I tell you this. I am doing us both a favor by not speaking to you right now.” 

And then he’s leaving the kitchen—nothing but a breeze against your cheek and the sound of a door slamming to prove he was ever there. 

The apartment is silent. You stand in the middle of the kitchen, unsure of what to do next. Spencer very, very rarely gets angry at you to the point of neglect, and you know he’s doing his best with what was modelled for him as a child and his tendency to feel things so deeply it’s nearly disabling; but that doesn’t make it hurt much less. It doesn’t make you feel less abandoned or alone.  

You’re sad, and you’re still pissed, and maybe you’re in just a bit of shock as you robotically move back to your nest of blankets on the couch and resume your schoolwork. What else is there to do? Unless Spencer is right—unless you really are about to get expelled after getting the answer key for an upcoming test from a friend, who then gave it to another friend, and so on. But is that really your fault?  

It’s a struggle to stay focused as your mind keeps drifting back to Spencer in the other room, those cruel words and that cold steely look in his eye that isn’t supposed to ever be aimed at you. It’s not a secret that side of him exists, but it doesn’t belong in this apartment. It’s not something he needs to use against you. He’s supposed to be on your side. But instead, he’d said you should be expelled and essentially called you stupid. And now you’re doing homework for a class at a school you may not even be a student of come Monday. 

---------------------------------------------------

The sound of the office door opening forty-five minutes later spikes your blood pressure and simultaneously makes your heart flutter, because no matter how mad at him you might be, Spencer is still Spencer.  

He comes to stand behind the couch quietly, but you don’t acknowledge him. Maybe your typing gets a bit more aggressive, but aside from that you flat out reject his presence. 

“Can we talk?” 

You let him sweat for a minute as you finish your paragraph. 

“I don’t know, Spencer. Can we? Or are you not done with your temper tantrum?” 

“That is... well deserved,” he sighs, rounding the couch and tapping the bottom of your foot, signaling that he wants you to move your legs. You despise how automatically you comply, pulling your knees to your chest to avoid touching him as he sits next to you. There’s a long moment of silence, in which you resume typing. Spencer scoffs, leaning in slightly to peer at your screen. “Are you doing homework right now? I’m a complete asshole to you and you just... do your homework?"

“What the fuck else was I supposed to do?” you almost-yell, slamming your laptop shut and blinking away potential tears. “The only person I wanted to talk to called me stupid and fucking left!” 

The tears realize their potential once you admit the blunt truth. 

Spencer carefully moves your laptop and pulls you into his arms—and you just let him. There’s not much fight left in you. There wasn’t a lot to begin with. 

“I am so sorry, angel. You’re right, I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have yelled, I shouldn’t have said what I said, I shouldn’t have walked away. I overreacted.” 

“Yeah, you really did,” you cry, allowing him to run his hand over your hair. “Why did you do that? Why were you so fucking mean?” 

His voice shakes slightly as he responds, betraying his own anxieties, and a new, unwelcome sense of trepidation slithers through your veins. 

“I was wondering that, too. Even as I was saying it, I knew—I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to be saying. And then I was in the other room and I wanted to be out here, and I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t. But I think I was just scared. Which—I know, doesn’t really make sense, but... I think about when Ethan dropped out of the academy, and ended up doing heroin in New Orleans for three years, and I think about when I almost left the BAU because I was so convinced I’d never get clean that I didn’t even want to anymore, and—and the idea of you losing your education and your direction like that terrified me, probably unreasonably, and I took it out on you. And I’m sorry.” 

“But I’m not like you or Ethan. You don’t have to worry about that. Even if I... even I do get in some sort of disciplinary trouble. That’s a road you don’t have to worry about me going down, ever.” 

He fixes some unseen wrinkle on your shirt.  

“Yeah, but, remember... I used to not be like me or Ethan either. Do you think twelve-year-old Spencer would have ever even considered that of the infinite realities and universes which exist, he was living in one where someday he’d be shooting up in the bathroom at work?” 

“Mm-mm,” you hum, shaking your head and burying your face in Spencer’s shoulder. The sound is more of a plea for him to be less descriptive than an answer to his rhetorical question. It’s still much easier for him to talk about that part of his life than it is for you to have to actually imagine it. You didn’t know him then, but you’ve seen pictures, and you know Spencer now, and it’s... it’s just too much. Too sad. 

“Okay,” he agrees soothingly, still playing with your hair. “I digress. My point is that literally anything is possible, and while it’s not necessarily likely, I more than anyone know that anxiety even over the most improbable of things is never completely unfounded.”  

You sniffle in response, too emotionally and physically exhausted to contribute much to the conversation by this point. Thankfully, Spencer can talk for two. An idiosyncrasy which you love and comes in handy every once in a while. He can play his own devil’s advocate; in this case, you. 

“But that doesn’t mean I get to take it out on you. Ever. I truly, truly, sincerely apologize for that. I never want to hurt you.” 

You let the apology sink into your skin like a salve, soothing every abrasion those earlier words had left in their violent wake. 

After a few minutes, you find the energy to ask a question that might best remain unanswered. 

“Are you still mad at me?” 

He’s quiet for a beat, seemingly contemplative as his fingers trace abstract patterns in a language all his own on your arm. 

“I’m not thrilled. But you were right earlier. It’s not my place to be mad at you for something like that.” 

“Mm... it’s a little bit your place. You’re an actual professor.” 

He chuckles. 

“At an entirely different university.” 

“Thank god,” you laugh. “You and me at the same school would be such an HR clusterfuck.”

While it’s almost a serious matter, the smile in his voice is evident. 

“Yeah... I, uh... try not to think about it.” 

“Okay, but seriously. In your professional opinion. Am I fucked? Like, do I need to prepare an appeal and character witnesses or whatever?” 

Spencer sighs. 

“It was incredibly reckless and irresponsible. You should be ready for disciplinary pushback from the schoolboard if you get caught. That being said... because over sixty of you got a hold of the answer key, I doubt anyone is getting expelled, and even if they did, it would likely only be the TA and the student he gave the key to. It’s my tentative, professional opinion that you’ll probably be fine.” 

You relax slightly, allowing a tension you didn’t realize was there to shed like an old skin. 

“I’m not gonna cheat again,” you promise on an exhale. It’s simply too much risk for too little reward.

Spencer’s response is quiet, and comes much faster than you’d expected. 

“Oh, I know you aren’t. Because if you do, you’re going to have to worry about disciplinary action from me. And I’m not nearly as nice as the dean of your school, darling girl.” 

But something about the way he says it—a thinly veiled threat/promise contrasted by a sweet kiss to your forehead—doesn’t exactly make academic honesty look all that exciting.

[stevebabey]

no one asked but this is the post that inspired this! thank u immensely for the luv <3 number 1 comment was wondering what steve’s bids were & from his pov, so without further ado...enjoy — part one here!

—

Begrudgingly, Eddie has to admit that Robin might be right.

It’s impossible not to be looking for the bids since he brought them up to her. Even though Eddie was fully expecting to tell Robin to suck it, maybe even wager what little money he had against this working out, Eddie can’t help but watch for them in every interaction. And fuck, she’s right.

They’re little, but they’re there.

The first one Eddie would’ve missed if he wasn’t looking for it. Actually, that’s a lie; Eddie does miss it, until Robin points it out, the nosy bitch. It’s minuscule and honestly, it just seems like Steve asking his opinion — which friends do all the time! It’s why Eddie brushes right over it.

“Okay, be honest,“ Steve had said, walking and talking as he entered the living room where Robin and Eddie were sprawled across the couches. They were both waiting on him, the three of them set on heading out to the drive-in to catch a film.

Eddie can’t fathom why Steve felt the need to change his outfit for it, but when he returns, he gets it. It’s not quite the usual polo Eddie had grown to like on Steve, this one hanging a little looser, the colour a bit darker than Steve’s usual choice, the sleeves a little shorter — almost midway to a muscle tee.

Steve’s fingers fiddle with the distressed collar of the shirt, smoothing invisible wrinkles and fussing over nothing. He swishes back his floppy hair with a flick of his head. “It’s a new shirt, I know it’s a little different - but what do we think?”

He says we but he’s looking at Eddie.

Eddie, who has taken to trying to reel in his gawp because what the fuck Steve? It’s like he’s well aware of what drives Eddie insane and has specifically leaned into it. Some evil goblin in Eddie’s brain whispers think how good he’d look in your shirt and he squashes it, giving a visible twitch to shut down that train of thought.

From the other couch, Robin clears her throat loudly and smiles sweetly at her best friend. “It looks great, Steve.”

It’s sincere and Steve’s mouth tugs up, nearly a smile but his gaze fast-tracks back to Eddie. Eddie nods in agreement, a bit sluggish from his distracting thoughts and god dammit, the extra exposed skin of Steve’s arms are so not helping. “Yeah, looks... looks good, man.”

Steve smiles, lips pressed together but his shoulders curl in just a bit, deflating just a tad. From where Steve can’t see her, Robin waves her hands wildly and catches Eddie’s attention. He watches as she gestures wildly and it takes a moment to realise what’s she mouthing — ‘A bid! That’s a bid, you idiot!’

Oh fuck, Eddie thinks. Cos it totally was; the question, the focus on Eddie. He doesn’t even think about the logistics of it, of the fact Robin was right, just jumps right into picking up the bid.

“You trying a new style?” Eddie asks and then thanks whatever god invented the whole fake-it-to-you-make-it schtick because he’s feeling so far from casual or confident. “Going metal on me, big boy?”

Eddie just manages to catch the grin that breaks across Steve’s face as he turns away, giving a scoff — it comes out too soft though, giving away his complete lack of annoyance. He pulls that usual Steve Harrington pose, hands sliding onto his hips, and screws his face into some melted smiley-grimace. “Shut up, Munson.”

Eddie grins and goads on the blush that’s beginning on Steve’s neck, a glorious tinged pink colour. “If this shirt is any indication, you’d pull it off just fine.”

Eddie watches the blush climb higher as Steve ignores the comment, his smile still giving him away. He grabs his coat and pats down his jeans — ridiculous tight acid wash jeans that Eddie hates he’s somehow become attracted to — ensuring he has his keys and wallet. Once assured, he looks up at his two friends again, brows raised, and says, “Ready to rock and roll?”

That comment alone has Eddie seriously reconsidering his type in men.

There’s only a brief moment to talk about it when Eddie and Robin cajole Steve into going and getting them both popcorn to get a moment alone. Steve had scoffed, face twitching in the way it did whenever he tried to hold back a bitchy comment, but he still stomped off in the direction of the snack stand.

The moment he’s out of earshot, both voices explode in the back of Eddie’s van.

“What did I say—”

“Jesus H Christ, you were right—”

“Literally how many times do I have—”

“Oh my god, you were right—”

“ —before you realise I’m always—”

“Robin.” He cuts her off, hands landing on her shoulders. Robin eyes them warily, lips still parted from how her rant had been cut off. “Robin, I’m gonna kill you.”

“What?” Robin’s nose scrunches up. “What the hell are you—”

“Oh Christ, I can’t believe- how long have you noticed those bids?” Eddie’s aware he sounds a bit estranged, eyes probably wide and it doesn’t help when he softly shakes Robin back and forth. She lets herself be shaken, hair flying back in forth. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me! You are such a bad gay friend!”

Robin smacks his hands off her shoulders with a frown, her freckly face perturbed at Eddie’s outburst. “Dude, it’s not my fault! May I remind you that until very very recently you were seeing someone else? What difference would it have made?”

Eddie waves his hand, disregarding the point with a shake of his head. His unkempt curls cover his face and Eddie sweeps them back in one motion, “What difference would it have made? Oh my, Jesus—“

Whatever long-winded sentence Eddie was about to spit out is lost by the sound of Steve’s approaching footsteps, effectively shutting both of them up.

Eddie flings himself to the other side of the van, putting an unusual amount of distance between Robin and him like they were being caught doing something they shouldn’t.

Robin frowns at him and gestures wildly with her hands in a way that means what the fuck man? Eddie gestures back, though he’s not entirely sure what his fast hand motions are supposed to mean when Steve rounds the door.

He’s got two buckets of popcorn tucked under each arm and Eddie quickly crosses his arms, tucking his hands into his armpits like his stupid hand motions will somehow give him away. 

Steve looks up, stopping just a way from the edge of the van, and looks at the pair of them. His eyes track from Robin still sitting on one of the old cushions and looking two seconds from burying her face in her hands, across to Eddie. He huffs a laugh and kneels on the edge of the van.

“I know he’s gross Robin,” He begins, tone light, as he holds out one of the buckets for Robin to take. “But c’mon, is the distance really necessary?”

Robin snickers as Eddie makes an appalled noise, both of which make Steve smirk. He holds out the other for Eddie to take and Eddie snatches it, glaring at him over the buttery rim for his comment. Then takes a handful and shovels it in because he can’t think of a witty comment to retaliate. Steve crawls into the van and plops himself between them with a content sigh.

“See? Gross.” He teases, shoving his hand into Eddie’s popcorn bucket to grab a handful. Eddie scowls and chews a little faster when the flavour on his tongue seems to register in his brain.

His eyes stare at the popcorn bucket as he chews, then swallows — up the front of the van, the radio that’s tuned into the correct frequency begins playing the opening credits song as the screen changes. Silence sweeps across the drive-in but despite the sudden hush, Eddie has no qualms about breaking it.

“Sweet n’ salty flavour?” He asks Steve, only half attempting a whisper. Robin shushes him instantly, her focus already on the movie that’s beginning. Steve smiles, looking a bit sheepish beneath the glow of the drive-in screen, but he nods.

“I know you like it.” He whispers with a small shrug of his shoulders. Like it wasn’t a big deal. Fuck, Eddie thinks again and hastily feeds himself another handful of popcorn before he says anything majorly stupid in response to that, like: Oh, amazing- have you noticed the big fat crush I have on you as well?

He doesn’t even need to look at Robin to know she’s smiling, smug as ever.

—

Steve, God bless his oblivious little heart, doesn’t even realise he’s doing it.

Steve likes Eddie. Eddie is— god, Eddie is different but he’s good.

He’s this strange amalgamation of traits that Steve can’t comprehend how they fit together in one body or how Eddie manages to pull it all off completely charmingly.

He’s loud, he says rude things, he’s fucking dorky, and far too sweet on the kids — he likes to tease Steve, and yet somehow, when Eddie calls him ‘pretty boy’, Steve knows he’s not actually making fun of him.

Steve likes Eddie, likes his boyishly endearing charm, likes his touchiness towards Steve that no other boy his age is like, likes his messy curls and his ‘holier than thou’ attitude about metal music even though Steve doesn’t get it, like at all. And fuck, Steve really wants Eddie to like him.

It reminds him faintly of when he first started working alongside Robin at Scoops. That thought tickles in the back of his mind, something along the lines of how he had wanted Robin to like him for other reasons, but he doesn’t delve into it.

To Steve, it’s simple: he just wants Eddie to like him.

After the night at the drive-in, between Eddie acting strangely skittish and Robin giving more amused snorts than usual, Steve knows something is up.

He knows they must have discussed something when they sent him on popcorn duty, the bastards. He tries his best to not feel left out; god knows Robin and he have more than a dozen secrets they’ve sworn not to tell anyone but each other.

Besides, Steve trusts Robin to come and tell him if he really needs to know, even if it does worry him a bit. He bites down his anxious thoughts, even trying for a moment to see if there’s a pattern he’s been missing.

That train of thought gets derailed when Steve recalls instead Eddie’s delightful reaction to his new shirt — that Steve definitely hadn’t bought for that specific reason.

Even though Robin had given him that look when he’d first shown it to her — her bright eyes had narrowed, her smile turning a little more coy, and Steve had felt his ears get a little hotter. She hadn’t said anything though, just suggested that he should wear it tomorrow night when they were going out with Eddie.

God, he was glad she suggested it.

Rewinding over Eddie’s parted lips, the way his brown eyes had drank in the details as they trailed up his body and lingered on his arms— Steve had the sudden thought to flex the muscle, just to elicit some reaction, but it had gone out the window at Eddie’s original dismal reaction.

‘Yeah, looks... looks good, man’. Said all aloof, like he hadn’t really thought it. It was like bursting a balloon hidden behind Steve’s ribs, one he wasn’t even aware was there until it was deflating pathetically, making his shoulders sag.

Then— ‘You trying a new style? Going metal on me, big boy?’ And dammit, it’s like Eddie had clocked exactly what calling him ‘big boy’ had done the first time in the Winnebago.

Eddie had then grinned, done another once over of the new shirt, even as Steve pretended to search for his keys and wallet while saying something snarky to try to cover up the heat crawling up his neck. Yet, Steve found himself smiling too because, fuck yes, Eddie liked it too.

But, apparently, whatever Eddie and Robin had discussed wasn’t considered important enough because Robin never brought it up.

The thought and worry about it melt away in Steve’s mind until the memory of that night is about Eddie’s compliment, about his cat-like grin over the popcorn bucket, and how he had leaned over to whisper every bad joke into Steve’s ear all through the movie.

Some of them had been down-right filthy jokes which Eddie only seemed to enjoy more when Steve screwed his face up and nudged Eddie in the ribs, yet unable to hide his smile.

After the third vulgar joke and subsequent nudge, Steve had chided ‘dude’ with a poorly hidden grin. Eddie, smile all cheeky, had nudged him back with a ‘dude’ of his own.

Which, of course, ensued a nudge competition til Robin had given a shush that librarians all over the world would be jealous of. But Steve didn’t even care because he and Eddie were arm to arm, pressed close together and Eddie…didn’t move. Stayed close, like he wanted the closeness the same way Steve did.

Steve only remembers the strange drive-in moment when Robin brings it up finally, on one interesting Saturday night.

It’s not the usual routine; it’s not very often that the whole group gets together to share drinks and get rowdy.

But it was for Robin’s birthday and she’d been persuasive enough to get even the introverts, like Jonathan, to come along. Though, she was aware he’d probably spend the night on a pool lounger, stoned to high heaven. Whatever floats your boat, she’d said, happy for the company in any form.

There’s enough of them there that it almost resembles some sort of party— and makes Steve try not to think about the last small party he threw here. He can tell Nancy notices it too, eyeing the pool a bit too long in a way he’s very familiar with, then taking a swig of beer.

So, Steve heckles them inside — doing a fantastic mothering impression as he waves the group indoors with a promise of pizza, and that has both Jonathan and Argyle perking up and beginning a fast discussion on the best pizza toppings.

Eddie makes a fuss, because of course he does, and moans terribly when Steve tries to roll him off the pool lounger he’s on. He’s had a bit of a joint and some beer, and Steve’s learned that he gets adorably stubborn after some substances.

“Stevie, this is mean,” he had pouted, gripping the edges of the lounger and staring up at Steve with those big brown eyes. “You telling me I did all that bonding with you for nothing? Can’t even lounge by the pool! I’ve got a couch at homeeeee.”

Steve had sent him an amused look of disbelief, hands on his hips after his first round of flicks against Eddie’s arm were apparently fruitless to get him to move. “Really? Didn’t peg you for a gold-digger, Eds.”

Eddie had snorted at that, one hand coming to slap over his mouth. Steve couldn’t quite hear what he had said but the words pegging and anytime slipped through and Steve thinks he could get the gist of that.

“Oh for Christ’s sake,” Steve muttered, feeling the tips of his ears turn warm. He didn’t know how Eddie could be such a menace— or why he enjoyed it so much when he was. Steve waved a hand in the direction of the doors, ignoring Eddie’s delighted snickering. “If you go inside now, you can be on music, alright?”

And that had finally got them all indoors, Eddie whooping and skedaddling through the doors in an instant, with a call of ‘no take backsies!’ echoing behind him.

Inside was much cozier, the whole group a little more connected when squished up on the couches together. Eddie had taken Steve’s word and was jamming a cassette into one of the speakers when Steve made it back inside after scouting around the pool for leftover cans and butts to throw out.

He’s just been thinking about what playful jab he could make at Eddie’s music, like Eddie always did to him when Robin hollered at him from the kitchen.

“Steve!” She’d yelled excitedly and he come to find her quick, brows raised as he entered the kitchen. She was grinning, already a bit jumpy as she got when she had a bit of liquor — but apparently not enough because when Steve saw what she’d called him in for, she’d announced, “Tequila shots!”

Which lead to now. A hazy combination of beer, tequila, and a bit of weed, and Steve is feeling good. Robin had managed to hijack the music not too long ago, with a hiccup of ‘it’s my birthday’ that had Eddie surrendering with a pout.

She’d since put on a bit of everything: some Blondie for Nance, Talking Heads for Jonathan, and some Bowie, just so she and Steve could dance along to ‘Magic Dance’ and she could do all the silly little goblin voices that made them both cackle.

Steve realised at some point that Robin was playing their mixtape, the one she’d made for driving in the morning, and nearly tripped stumbling over to her in his excitement. He grabbed her shoulders, not too hard, and squeezed.

“Is it- is this our mixtape?” Steve asked, words slurring only a bit. Robin gleamed, hair bouncing with her excited nod.

“Yes!” She was already dancing, even though the tape was between songs — because she knew what song was coming. “It’s Springsteen time, Steve!”

Right as the drums to Born to Run filtered out the speaker.

And oh, Steve loves Robin so much. He loves having a best friend that knows his favourite song and gets jittery and excited because she knows it’s about to play— that she put it on this mix for him.

“You’re my best friend!” Steve says, the words bursting out like he can’t control them. He doesn’t even feel embarrassed, just happy, just drunk, and overwhelming happy to be able to have this.

And even though Robin knows this, she still beams, feet dancing along and just begins to sing along with the song, “In the days, we sweat it out on the streets of a runaway American dream…”

It’s a brazen drunken performance from the both of them. Steve’s chest is heaving after just one chorus that he’s pretty sure he put his whole soul into and he’s so fucking happy —and it feels like pure instinct to seek out Eddie, his eyes scouring the room for him.

Eddie’s leaned up against the wall, hiding his smile behind a can and Steve doesn’t think twice about it— doesn’t think about why he’s so drawn to Eddie, why he wants to include him in this happiness — just extends his hand out and grins.

Eddie sees the bid coming this time.

Part Three.

— 

yes i saw all ur lovely tags and MAYBE cried about it. but thats none of ur business.

@orangeandthefairroadkill @swimmingbirdrunningrock @sadcanadianwinter @phantypurple @omg-elledubs-things @henderdads @farfaras @mixsethaddams @prismandblue @kerlypride @bushbees @legitcookie @temporalcoffin @callmesirkay @beautifully-useless @millyditty @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @ninjapirateunicorns @darkwitchoferie @vi-the-best-you-can @psychosnowfox @desert-fern @scarletzgo @cr0w-culture @softpink-candlelight @livingforfictionalcharacters @makewavesandwar @kozuuji @rhapsodyinalto @eddiethesexy @cassaloopa @lightwoodbanethings @qu33rcommunist @moonlitkilljoy @starkdusk @theysherobinbuckley @sanguineterrain @loganwright @sillysparrow @hotcocoaharrington @eddie-munson-is-my-wife @she-is-tim @steddiehearts @sideblogofthcentury @sidebarre @corrodedcoughin @stevieclaus

[allisonlol]

helloooooooooooooooooo

I hope you're doing well and you're rest because we don't want you to get tired just for us 😭

I have a request I don't know if you already did but can you do dazai and chuuya with reader who stained her skirt with period blood but she's too embarrassed and try to hide it from them

a/n: HELLO.,,,,,everyone omfg srry for being gone for 8 months 😵‍💫 do u guys still luv me…. /j. i’ve been writing on here for 3 years now and we all need a break sometimes but ty for the continued support!! this req is super cute

warnings: afab / fem reader, periods, blood

Chuuya

chuuya is like. super chill abt blood and periods so idk why u would need to hide this from him 😭

but let’s say u guys recently started dating and u still felt a little awkward abt it!!

chuuya had invited you over to his penthouse for the evening and you wore a new skirt just for the occasion

you knew it was risky to wear such a light color while on ur period but WHATEVER !!

a few hours go by fine, with the two of you watching movies and trying sips of his extensive wine collection

however, u start panicking in the bathroom when u realize you’ve bled thru ur new skirt 😭 at THE chuuya nakahara’s house of all places!!!

cuz what if he thinks it’s gross and kicks u out?☹️

^(he would NEVER but ur so panicked and worried that ur overthinking)

you try scrubbing the stain out with cold water which helps a little but also kinda makes it worse cuz now ur skirt has a big wet patch 😭🙏🏻

the stain is still noticeable as well but u suck it up and leave the bathroom

ur immediately fumbling for ur keys and talking about how u have to go home

chuuya is like “wtf happened” and thinks that HE did something wrong or made u uncomfy in some way

he’s surprised but super understanding and goes to walk u to the door

^while walking u out tho he notices the blood and asks all politely and quietly if that’s what’s wrong 🥺 this man is a sweetie pie omfg

u admit to him that it was and he offers u some of his clothes to wear if u want to stay longer…

Dazai

so!! the two of u had went to the mall for the day

an hour in you ditch dazai to sprint to the bathroom and realize that. yes you started ur period and YES it leaked thru ur skirt!!!

you have no way to hide it so you just pray u can get home asap to change before anyone notices

you meander out of the bathroom and sift thru the crowd to find dazai

dazai is already on high alert at being in such a public place with u that he immediately notices ur acting off

^(by “high alert” i just mean that he gets worried you’ll be targeted or attacked bc ur close to him 😭)

anyway. the second dazai notices ur aura is off he won’t stop pestering you about what’s wrong

acts all playful about it but he is low key sweating bc what if something serious happened while he wasn’t around??

you keep fidgeting with ur skirt and insisting that you want to leave immediately

dazai will go quiet and nod in agreement, and y’all begin to leave

except you don’t want the people behind you guys to see the blood so ur pulling all sorts of moves to hide it 😵‍💫

you try walking in front of dazai for coverage but u also don’t want HIM seeing it so ur honestly just stumbling around awkwardly

shit, at this point dazai thinks you’ve been drugged or something and grabs ur arm to drag you towards the exit 😭

shoves ur ass in the car and grabs ur face to examine ur eyes and see if you’re actually on something LOL

^you’ve fr never seen him so serious before

you realize what he thinks has happened so you super bleakly tell him the truth so he stops worrying

dazai will just look at u like “😐” bc WDYMMM u were trying to hide a bloodstain from him!!! he has seen much worse!!!

dw cuz he bursts out laughing 5 seconds later at how both of y’all were so worried over nothing

[mimisplayground]

Soft Hands and Softer Whispers ＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

Tags: Soft!Ghost, Oral, Hes so sweet to you, Gentle Sex, AFTERCARE KING, domestic life, he convinces you to move in, SOFT!!, not really touched on but clingy!ghost

guys uhmmmm leave a request if u wanna see him be rough and mean :3

——————

Ghost was, by all accounts, the best sex but the worst hookup.

He knew how to leave your legs trembling and your breathing ragged, with fingerprints on your hips, neck, and jaw. He left you with a limp for days to come and he knew all the right spots to press his lips when he felt nice enough to push his mask up. The perfect mix of rough and gentle that would leave any man, woman, and inbetween falling at his feet.

He did NOT know that when the sex was over, the hookup usually left the same night or morning after. Breakfast in bed and royal treatment (because no matter what you are, he’s treating ypu like royalty after demolishing your insides), while they were all nice, they weren’t hookup behavior. Holding your hand and grunting out that you were his was sexy in bed, but felt a touch more romantic than you felt it should when he extended it to the baths he ran for you while he washed your body.

He would show up at your place after he got back from deployment everytime without fail. Spending weeks and months there while making jokes that sounded a bit too serious at times. “Just move into my place, lovely. Be nice havin’ ya around.” You giggled about it, leaving the answer in the air.

Until one day you’re watching him carry boxes into a shitty one bedroom apartment, that had little to no decorations, a key in your hand, and as he grabs his deployment, he pats your shoulder and says “give it some flare.” And with that you’re left alone for the next few months in an apartment of a hookup.

And when he came back, he showered, grabbed you up off the couch, laid you down on his bed that now had soft fluffy duvet to cover the top, and ate you out like a man starved.

He grabbed your hips when they tried to twitch away from overstimulation, and the slurps coming from him were downright sinful. You felt your eyes roll back and the knots in your stomach snap again and the liquidy burst that came from you had you blushing with tears leaving your face. “Si…quit it…” You huffed with big crocodile tears rolling down your cheeks. He climbs up and kisses away the tears for a moment, rubbing the back of your head.

And you sigh when you feel him push inside, hushed whispers of “mine, all mine, my sweet thing” chanted out of his gravelly voice. He’s so sweet and gentle with you. Rolling his hips firmly while kissing all over your face.

It was in the bathtub as he scrubbed your back that you said aloud “this seems a little too…romantic for a hookup.” There was a silence that overtook the bathroom before Ghost huffed and wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into an embrace. “We ain’t just hookin’ up anymore, are we?”

You hummed for a moment, your hand reaching back to feel his stubbly beard and lean into him. “No, I guess we aren’t just hooking up anymore.” You left a small kiss on his temple and you feel him smile.

You suppose it was fine Simon didn’t know hookup etiquette. If he did, then you wouldn’t have a boyfriend who was great at sex AND aftercare.

————-

errmmmm sry its not da usual jjk content i just luv luv luv soft ghost

anyways asks and requests AND commissions are open guys pls leave stuff for me to do

[lit3rallyll0yd]

HII FIRST OF ALL I JUST WANTDD TO SAY I REALLY LOVE HOW U WRITE DAZAI!!!!

ANYHOW COULD I ASK FOR DAZAI WITH A READER WHOS REALLY SICK BUT SHE TRIES TO SNEAK OUT OF THE HOUSE OR GO SOMEWHERE ALL THE TIME OR EVEN JUST HIDES AROUND THE HOUSE EVERY CHANCE SHE GETS EVEN THOUGH SHES SUPPOSED TO REST IN BED CAUSE SHE HATES BEING BORED/FEELING SICK AND JUST LAYING IN BED ALL DAY

with a energenic, sick reader

dazai<3

warnings: lowercase writing, headcanon format, however told through a short story. female reader!! REQUESTS ARE OPEN !!

a/n: AWH glad you luv my dazai writing!! hope you enjoy reading anon<3

"dazai-NO-i'm not a child! i don't want to stay in bed-"

you kicked your legs as he held you bridal style. although your kicks were heavy and high- he somehow found a way to hold you in place.

"you say your not a child- however not wanting to stay in bed seems very childish to me."

he reasoned. but his reasoning brought him nowhere.

he gently places you on the bed of your shared apartment, hoping you would stay put.

thankfully you did.

"there we go. comfy?" he asked as he pulled the covers over your body.

you grumble, peeking your eyes out as you body was fully covered.

"aeh- don't be so sour~ you have your boyfriend, who loves and cares for you, by your side all day to help you get better!"

"dazai-i have plans with friends today!"

"post-pone it. your sick, 'donna."

"but-"

you were left staring at the ceiling of your bedroom.

he kissed your lips before sitting up from the bed and went to make you some lunch.

"we'll see how you feel in the tomorrow~ now stay put, i'll be back in a few minutes."

it was boring.

real boring.

were you even that sick??

yes. you turn into akutagawa and cough for like 20 minutes straight then complain about your throat.

don't lie to yourself.

you looked left and right.

then out the window.

you thought for a moment before nodding to yourself and carefully stepping out of bed and you feet touched your slippers that were on the ground by the bedside.

you grabbed a small sweater and some track pants, quickly throwing them on and quietly left the bedroom.

you sneaked around the hallway and toward the kitchen, where you can hear dazai softly humming to himself.

you peeked your head out to see him steaming some food; you were unsure what they were....

wait- is he cooking??

he can't cook!

he must just be heating them up.

of course.

your sick and he buys store-made food and will probably tell you he cooked it...

YOU CAN SEE THE BOX IN THE TRASH BESIDE HIM-

since he was distraced- you made your move.

you texted your friends your on your way and grabbed your small coat.

it was cold..and you didn't want to get more sick then you already were.

the moment you took your coat and was reaching for your keys, you heard a sinister giggle in your ear.

you screamed, despit it hurting your vocal cords, you whip around to see dazai.

he held your wasit as he spun you around to face him, almsot dipping uou but the wall stopped you from falling on your back.

your back was arched alittle between the wall.

"my, my what's this~? my belladoona trying to sneak out?!" he gasped playfully. "i thought i told you to stay in bed? tch, tch~"

you blushed softly but glared at him, "because i have plans today dazai! i'm not going to post-pone because we're going to watch a movie! the tickets are half-off!!"

he hummed, "but- that doesn't explain why you disobeyed me?"

"yes it does!!"

you felt his hot breath on your neck as he smirked softly.

"you know, this isn't the first time i've caught you sneaking out?"

you cocked your head to the side, "w-what?"

"c'mon~ let's get you back to bed."

"w-w-what?" he teased, "do you really think you can keep things hidden from lil'ol me?"

you rolled your eyes as he pulled away from you, but held your hand with a soft grip as he lead you back inside the apartment.

"but- no dazai! i'm so bored! my friends will hate me!"

"no one can possibly hate you for being sick, my dear~"

"but- i'm bored!"

he chuckled, "then i shall make it less boring! nothing's boring when your with dazai, hmm?"

he tilts his head at you, waiting for your response.

"ugh, your insuffurable!"

"then you must be 10x insuffurable beeeeeecause" he clicks his tounge, "your dating me~"

[youremyheaven]

this is gunna sound so weird... men make my skin crawl. Like im attracted to men but everytime i see a man, my rbf awakens and i become hyper aware of my surroundings 😭

it doesn't help that im attending an all girls college now... any advice on how to ease up pls around them? I find it hard to even want to talk to them 😭 ik all men aren't bad and i may always not be in danger (imagine that in all caps and red) but i just wanna be able behave and think like a normal person around them ( this is so much that i even can't stand strangers)

Loads of luv to you ❤

honestly i hope u meet better men!!! there are some disgusting nasty perverted pieces of shit out there who dont deserve to be around women and i completely get why u would feel repulsed by them.

i wonder if u have malefic influence, they usually struggle the most with the opposite gender

tips on how to ease up around men:

think in terms of energy. dont project anger or hatred because thats what you will see in return. i know this is very triggering and difficult for many people but you HAVE to believe in good to SEE good. despite absolutely everything that ive gone thru, i still believe that people are inherently good, kind and helpful and i see proof of it everyday.

ive had men treat me with dignity, respect and kindness in the shadiest of circumstances and ive had men be nasty to me out in the open, so it just comes down to character. just think of men as people honestly and not as hound dogs about to attack u.

2. imagine them as little boys

sometimes when men are soft or boyish with me, it reminds me of how they mustve been as kids and it warms me. i have two little boy cousins who are 12 and 6 respectively and they both adooooreeee me and want to marry me when they grow up🥺🥺🥺theyre the sweetest kids on the planet and i could never ever feel otherwise, theyre my babies. idk if this is something u can relate to but think of a little boy you're close to, how innocent and silly he is and how you could never see him as a threat or hate him and understand that grown men can be like that too.

3. how we treat people has a lot to do with how people treat us

if you have a rbf and generally act standoffish and cold/distant, then you're probably perceived as being bitchy 😬😬and nevermind men, even women probably find u intimidating or hard to approach. im only saying this because learning how to navigate social situations is 90% of adulthood and the key to personal and professional success.

learn to smile more. i know women hate being told to smile but honestly we should alllll smile more. force yourself to do it until it becomes a habit. be that person who smiles at strangers. dont u feel happy when someone smiles at you??? so in turn, be that person to others!!! <33

learn to get out of your head. most people think too much. i hate spending time with people who talk about everything from a victim pov. like yes sure u/we women, are in a position of disadvantage in many ways, historically speaking but ???? this attitude?? wont get u anywhere. (I'm speaking generally and not about you particularly)

i would say the key is to turn inward and work on yourself. read all those cliche self help books about "how to influence people" yada yada,, learn social etiquette and watch all those youtube gurus who teach soft skills. forget about men and hating them for a second and just focus on self improvement. as you change, youll see the world change with u.

just think of men as people basically. also idk if youre familiar with carl jung but i feel like you have a wounded animus. many women who grew up with an absent (emotionally or otherwise) father grow up to project all that onto men. and in turn have damaging relationships with men!!

im not a man defender and im in no way saying all men are good but i genuinely dont think its healthy to hate, thats all!!

idk if any of this is helpful sikeee but lmk if u have any updates

also lots of love to u too angel!!<3

[kei-luv]

please can u write tall muscly male reader fucking Zack from lookism Like hes drooling abd whimpering and stuff😈😈

.⋆｡⋆☂˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆. 𝗣𝘂𝗽𝗽𝘆

Note: I'll do my best? As I've stated before, my smut writing isn't really that good, so uhh, yeah I'll just try my best to make it look good :]

───

tw: 18+, cussing, begging, Zack panting like a dog, I guess you can say puppy play?? spanking(1), Master calling(3), and Zack crying. genre: smut reader: male characters: zack lee

word count: 278 masterlist

Zack Lee, a boy with a reputation for picking fights with anyone who gets on his nerves, for always controlling the action during them, and for being a bully to those he views as inferior.

Naturally, it would come as a shock to see someone like him begging for [Name], panting like a dog as [Name] thrusted deeper into him.

"What happened to that bratty attitude of yours, huh? D'you only say those things so I can fuck it out of you..?"

[Name] muttered, his hold on Zack's waist growing tighter as he fucked deeply into him, causing Zack to loudly moan and clench his hands tightly to the sheets. "Fuck..Please [N-Name]..!~"

Slowing down his thrusts, [Name] took a hand off of Zack's waist, bringing it up, and slapped the male's ass, his cheek gradually turning into a dark shade of red, leaning down to his ear.

"That's not my name, pup.." He murmured, soft whimpers escaping Zack's lips as tears rolled down his cheeks, staining the once-white bedsheets.

"Fuck..Mng~ Please..M...Master..Please..fuck me faster~!" He begged, slowly rubbing against [Name]'s cock, hoping to experience the same pounding sensation he had felt earlier.

"Please Master..~" Without another thought, [Name] seized both sides of the male's hips, driving rough, forceful thrusts into Zack as loud groans erupted from his mouth, drool dripping from the sides of his lips, and his back arched in pleasure.

"Angh!~ Wa..Wanna c-cum..~ I wanna cum..Please, Master~"

"Alright..I'll let you cum then. But just so you know, I will not be stopping anytime soon, ok..?" The [h/c] murmured as Zack shakily nodded, whimper after whimper escaping his lips as [Name]'s thrusts persisted.

"Yeah..that's a good puppy.."

AN: I honestly have no idea what I just wrote, but I hope this was to your liking?? I did try my best though.

©KEI-LUV. please do not translate or repost any of my work on any other platform, or claim any of it as your own. 2023

[ae-neon]

Nessian Rant part 3

First I wanna say the looneys in this fandom make it so unbearable to be here and just have fun. I used to post whatever I wanted without a second thought but now everything has to sit in the drafts for 3 days while I stress over how people might react.

Fuck that.

I'm gonna scream about what I wanna scream about and if you take it personally that's your problem. These are just characters, clock in to reality and stop acting like they raised you.

Now...

I always see my Nessian mutuals talk about acowar Cassian and trilogy Cassian as a whole being so great but...

To be clear I don't mean Cassian as a standalone character, he's literally amazing alone but in Nessian? Be serious

He's also amazing with every other woman he comes into contact with except Nesta... 🤦🏻‍♀️ can't believe yall stan this ship, stand up rn please 😭 lolol jk. This is just a rant, ship literally whatever the fuck you want, luv u 🫶🏼

I said in a recent answer that the key to enjoying SJM's books is abiding by the Sarah Says rule.

Listen to what Sarah Says even if you read with your own eyes that in canon that "character A got shot by character B", if Sarah Says "well actually B doesn't have fingers so he couldn't pull the trigger and A actually shot himself from 3 feet away being both the victim and the gunman" then that's that.

I'm gonna refer to the facts on paper as canon and what Sarah Says as the narrative and what fans think as fanon.

The thing with a lot of (anti Feysand pro Nessian) fans is they can break the Sarah Says rule only when they want to.

They see past the narrative and fanon to look at the canon and say "I don't like that/ I don't think that's healthy/ that guy sucks/ they both suck"

But then will say acomaf and acowar Nessian was great. What was sooooo great about it? I'm not gonna act like they don't have good moments but they definitely aren't as good as fanon or the narrative makes them out to be.

Let's look at their first meeting

Narrative/ Sarah Says/ Feyre's Mind: Cassian is looking at Nesta and Nesta is ignoring Cassian. There's a little back and forth. Nesta tries to ignore him, he doesn't like that. Do you feel some tension? I feel some tension

Fanon: Cassian was the only one brave enough to call Nesta on her BS and dish it back to her/ he got under her skin/ finally someone tells her off etc you know what I'm referring to

Canon: Feyre and Elain frequently challenge Nesta and she more often than not gives in to them. The IC are in the house because Feyre wants to be there and Elain said to hear them out. In that same scene, Feyre essentially tells Nesta she's living her best life and to fuck off. And power to her. That's just their dynamic.

But Cassian? Cassian is a stranger. He's in her house. He's asking for her help. His HL is asking for her help. So why was he antagonising her?

The narrative and fanon loves to act like Cassian is at best an equal and at worst below Nesta in some way and he's just stepping up to meet her energy but ???

Nesta didn't want them in her home. She worried that just working with them would put herself and others in danger. She didn't want to become Fae. She didn't want to share her story to garner sympathy for the NC. She didn't want to kill or use swords.

But all of those things happened anyway??

She's always the one backed into a corner and then treated like she was on equal ground just cause she's still got her pride? That single sin of not breaking is always punished again and again.

Do you see how you've bought into what Sarah Says?

Hybern and the Cauldron?

Cassian was twitching trying to reach for her, this was the moment we knew for sure they were gonna be mates omg

And Nesta? She was right. Everything she feared would happen did but even worse? She and Elain have been kidnapped and she doesn't know why they're being dunked like chicken wings but the fucking pot tried to kill her. She's the one who fell for an eternity and fought her way back to life.

No offense but not the greatest moment to base your romance on since you have to swivel the camera away from a woman in a traumatizing situation to point at a man and say look how seeing her hurt hurts him 🤕

And acowar??? The supposed golden era of Nessian?? Babe, that's just spray paint

It's Nesta who stands up for Cassian at the HL Meeting. You know what she also does? Recount her trauma to strangers, she isn't feeling well, she stands up for innocent humans and fae, she commands a room full of the most powerful men on the Continent.

It's Nesta who calls for Cassian, saves his life, and covers her body with his. These are Nessian moments yes but they are Nesta's actions. It was her who made Nessian shine.

Cassian? He promised her forever and then ignored her? Pulled away, got embarrassed or something who the fuck cares.

But this is your man - look at the canon - this is your man??

And you said yes.

That's why you got ACOFAS. That's why you got your 500 year old man telling a shell shocked, dying woman that he didn't know why her sisters loved her. That's why you got a leader of legions raging like a 14 year old league player. A whole r/AITA villain

And that's why he embarrassed y'all in ACOSF. That's why you got EIGHT HUNDRED PAGES AND NOT A SINGLE I LOVE YOU because you already accepted less than the bare minimum

Because you failed to apply the rule equally for both ships.

Cassian is also in a power imbalanced relationship with Nesta, he's also 500 years older than her so why suddenly have issue with him having control over her and using it to break her and reshape her how he wants?

Again. You can ship what you want. You can indulge in fanon all you want. I support that. Just hope you know that that's what you're doing.

Mutuals don't hate me 😭

[1-800-rh]

(In case anyone wanted a pt 2 . Here is the second chapter to my Rodrick X Fem!Reader , you can find it on wattpad 😊My account is Bylersss!)

"YOU still not talking to them ?" Y/n took a sip of her smoothie. She quickly put it down & latched onto the passenger handle as Rodrick was driving on the sidewalk - in the opposite direction of traffic. "Ehh , sort ofish . Have you heard anything from your parents?"

She shrugged & pulled out her pink Motorola flip phone. "Hey Y/n ! We miss u & just wanted to let u know that we are now traveling to Miami concerning our new product. We may be going home in a month or two. Luv Mom XOXO." She snapped it shut & put it back into the pocket of her jacket.

Rodrick kept silent for a bit then finally spoke up when they'd come to a stop. "My parents are taking us to Roarin' Rapids next weekend. We leave on Friday , I was wondering if you'd like to come ?" He then nonchalantly shrugged. "If you want. Greg is bringing the Hamburglar so thought you might want to come."

She chuckled at the one of many insults he had for Rowley. She nodded & grabbed the handle once more. "Yeah for sure . Sounds awesome."

Y/n fiddled with her fingernails as they pulled into the Heffley residence. Rodrick quickly noticed it & decided to speak up about it . "You nervous or something?" She gave a heavy sigh & shook her head .

"No I just have lots of things going on in my mind."

"Seems like it might be something more."

She tightened her first & watched him pull the key out of the ignition, frustration was scribbled all over his face . "You know you can always talk to me right ."

Y/n looked around for anything to withdraw the attention off of her & onto something else . That's when she saw Greg & the familiar chubby boy. "Looks like Rowley's here again !" She smiled as they both exited the car & made their way to the tweens.

"Hey turd face , I told mom I'd give you some drum lessons in exchange for mom bucks. Follow me to the garage." He paused & gave the chubby kid an up & down examination, disgust written all over . "And bring Salad Dodger with you."

Rowley , the bowl cut haired kid, pointed to himself & whispered a , "Is he talking about me ?" to Greg. Y/n chuckled & nodded , following after the three boys.

She found herself sat on top of a cooler reading a magazine, Rodrick played away at the drums . Rowley & Greg both had confusion written on each of their faces , sharing a glance at one another here & there before looking at Rodrick & then back down to the bowls in front of them .

"When do we get to play the real drums ?"

Rodrick removed his headphones & chortled . "Like I would ever let you touch them!" Greg rolled his eyes & through the utensils he held on to the ground. "I'm sick of this. Let's go play Twisted Wizard , Rowley."

Y/n peeped over her magazine & looked at Rodrick , who was putting his drumsticks away. "Mom bucks ?"

"It's this dumb thing my mom came up with . Basically we bond as brothers & we get play money we can exchange for real bucks."

She dipped her head to indicate she understood. "Well how much have you made ? You can barely stand him."

"Haha . Funny. But I found the fake money in an old board game , so in actuality I don't really have to bond with him." He said . She chuckled & fished for her phone in her jacket.

"I gotta run , I made plans with my friends to catch a movie. Come with ?"

He walked with her down the set of stairs & shook his head. "Nah , the bands coming soon to practice for the talent show."

"Sucks. Alright then I'll see you tomorrow!" She leaned in & gave him a quick hug before pulling away & heading out front.

•

"What were you guys thinking ?! I asked for you to be civilized just for a bit !"

Rodrick groaned the moment his mom started going on about Sunday's incident, again. It had been 3 days since it happened & yet she kept going on & on .

However, it seemed like Frank had gotten a new job & had reduced his drinking - making him the only parent that was tolerable for the moment being. He couldn't wait to talk to Y/n, with the punishment came getting his van taken away & phone away. They lived next to each other but because part of his punishment was also not being allowed out of the house equaled no Y/n . He couldn't even talk to her in class as they would get too busy & by the time he tried talking to her class was over.

He cursed under his breath as he headed towards the domicile. His dad called out for him the moment he hopped out of the vehicle. "Rodrick , come here."

Rodrick spun & slowly made his way towards his father . He awaited for a whole ass lecture but to his surprise received his keys & cell phone back. He had obviously given Frank a weird look before the older man began to explain himself. "Your mom is upset , obviously. But she had asked me to give these to you. I know the new drums aren't the best but I felt bad about the last set & decided to buy you those."

Rodrick felt himself smile but he was able to contain it & only said "Thanks." before heading to his home.

He flipped his phone open to see multiple missed calls & texts from Y/n , Bill , Drew , & Ward. First & foremost he went ahead & gave a call to his band members.

Once the call had concluded he called Y/n , there was no answer. He tried again.

Nothing.

Then one more time .

He had felt worried & quickly went to his window that faced her room. He felt his heart drop as he watched her walk out the house , hand in hand with Carter Samuels. She paused to adjust her shoe lace & quickly reached for his hand again , the biggest smile was spread on her face.

Rodrick quickly shut the blinds & tossed his phone onto his bed . He gritted his teeth before punching the wall . He then could only sigh & tossed himself onto his bed.

[foosybit]

Mayoi in PriPara Outfits Part 1

this is a suuuuuper long post cuz i did 2 drawings for about 20 outfits????? so here's the best ones so u dont miss anything by not actually going thru them all o7

but woooo !!! basically i've been on a long journey rewatching pripara very slowly so it's kinda seeping into my brain so i wanted to mess around with what outfits mayoi would go for if he went 2 pripara !! if u want a teal eyed version that also isnt split into parts, heres my pixiv post

last few things to say b4 i start, hello 3 pripara fans on my account, no boypara outfits cuz i didnt grow up with that (the last op i remember is the 6th one and i dont think im anywhere near that yet in my rewatch), honestly i have no clue if there's even proper boypara outfits??? i just know it exists idk anything about it, and if u see placeholders thats cuz i wanna keep the 3 image layout, thats the only reason why lol. and outfit descriptions will go below the art of the outfit. ok time 2 start !!!!!!

Petit Devi from Holic Trick Classic !! this was the first one I did back on.... Janurary 2nd lol. I have yet to see Mayoi in a bright pink but u know what, my executive decision says he deserves it. hi 3 pripara fans on my account again, i should also say most of these (like this one) will be from the arcade stuff cuz i just picked stuff i liked from the wiki's coord list

Sexy Girl from Holic Trick cuz Mayoi's the sexiest girl i know !! from now on all the coords will be from Holic Trick (an in-show brand) cuz 2bh w y'all i mostly just browsed Holic Trick for this whole series of drawings cuz im not going thru all those dam coords. although i've done 2 short skirts so far i do think mayoi'd like longer skirts more, but pripara likes short skirts more so so be it o7

Gothic Check !! the grey shirt and black jacket is kinda giving fs2 4star vibes so this would be the fs2 4star if enstars were cool (wore pripara outfits)

Modern Coffee Maid !! I was thinking of maybe changing the color but i liked the way the orange contrasts with the purple making it look kinda halloweeny :] I also have a personal bias towards brown i luv that color !! but ya if i had 2 say, he'd probably be a 3star if this were a set, kinda vaguely fits him but not enough to be under the spotlight imo

Classic Trump !! Sophy actually wears this in the show and i think it's so cute i wonder how the other alka members would style the vest in their own way (im 2 lazy 2 do that myself yawwnnn) in fact mayoi himself would probably prefer longer sleeves but u kno, stayed tru 2 the original n stuff, anyway say hello to bright pink again mayochan

Sparkling Jellyfish Sophy !! hi kanata hi fish wife hi nata hello nata hi nata whats up nata i love u nata

Nin'Nin Among the Water from Baby Monster !! when i saw this outfit i was chained to my tablet the demons were holding me hostage i had to make the ninja association wear it or i'd suffer a public execution

My Design Holic Trick !! back to holic trick for the rest again :] this is the one i posted on its own hehehehe it's still the one i put THE most effort into (which is why it's the only one i bothered to sign, still dont repost the rest tho please and thank u im just lazy) cuz man its a vibe its so good its one of my favs still i love stupid shorts and the puffy sleeves with the cropped vest and black and purple and the heart and bows and keys which are kinda all reasons i also like mayoi (heart in mayois vibe comes from his big heart muah) bless u mayoi i luv u

Night Navy !! mayoi loves to kill artists in cold blood with random intricate patterns (or maybe thats just an enstars thing in general) so i knew i had to give him this dress. gave him an undershirt cuz what if he gets cold :[

And that's it for this post !! I've now reached the image limit, so see ya in the next post !! (sorry foosybit followers for triple posting i didnt realize i drew so much)

[vadymxarsioxska]

Fu*k all, take a look at my favorite list and see if we have favorites in common!!

Int if u have some in common !!

(there is 72, and I may update it after,)

And remember I don't support any of those characters bad actions!!

Kins: ★

Comfort characters: ᰔ

╰──────────────╯

Luvs list;

1.Kira ;

2.Hazamada ; ★

3.hot pants ; ★

4.mista ;

5.terunosuke ;

6.mikitaka; ᰔ

7.secco ; ᰔ

8.sandman ;

9.keicho ; ᰔ

10.lisa lisa ;

11.ermes ;

12.toru ; ★

13.stray cat ;

14.kira 8 ;

15.aya ; ᰔ

16.bruno ; ᰔ

17.reimi ;

18.F.F ;

19.ceasar ;

20.lucy ; ᰔ

21.doppio ;

22.santana ;

23.polnareff; ★

24.risotto;

25.pucci ;

26.koichi ; ᰔ

27.kakyoin ;

28.toyohiro ;

29.rikiel ;

30.wheater ;

31.Yashuo; ᰔ

32.mariah ;

33.joseph ;

34.yukako ;

35.gwees ; ᰔ

36.jolyne ;

37.Gyro ;

38.josuke ;

39.diego ;

40.trish ; ᰔ

41.okuyasu ;

42.narancia ;

43.wamuu ;

44.will a. Zepelli ;

45.anasui ;

46.anne ;

47.tamami ;

48.pet shop ;

49.hayato ; ᰔ

50.ken ; ᰔ

51.melone ;

52.gelato ;

53.cioccolata ;

54.Tiziano ;

55.illuso ;

56.sorbet ;

57.steely dan ;

58.squalo ;

59.ungalo ;

60.perla ; ᰔ

61.erina ;

62.bruford ;

63.N'doul ;

64.Shinobu ; ᰔ

65.Esidisi ;

66.Straizo ;

67.Poco ;

68.Smokey ;

69.Kei ; ᰔ

70.Karera ; ᰔ

71.Ringo ;

72.Stroheim;

LMAO IM SORRY IS SO LONG!!

; @67andreaxoxo has almost half of those characters opposite in his favs lmao//

[yenqa]

10 QUESTIONS FOR U - valentines edition

favorite color of roses?

favorite flowers?

you can send a love letter to anyone. fictional/idols/celebs. who?

which idols have the best rizz?

most rizzful mutual?

favorite petnames/nicknames? giving or recieving?

fictional characters you're in love with?

have you ever had an online crush?

songs that you want to play at your wedding?

fav breakup songs?

fav love-themed kpop song?

mutual with beautiful themes?

pink vs red ? coquette vs old money / preppy?

favorite sweets?

DRINK WATER + YOU ARE LOVED <3

hi thank u sm ><!

1. maybe pink? i dont really have a preference

2. i really like tulips and lilies! or lilies of the valleys either one!

3. obviously jay but not a love letter.. maybe just a letter to tell him that hes worked so hard and deserves all the love he gets !!

4. hmm i think hyeju (maybe thats cause i have a huge crush on her) but literally half of them are losers

5. Uhmmmm. @run2seob BUT SHES GONEEE :((((

6. hmm i don’t really have any nicknames but i was given the name “yen” by a moot!

7. tsukishima kei <3 my number 1, kazehaya from kimi ni todoke!

8. no definitely not LMFAO

9. i see the light from tangled. OO OR let the light in by lana del rey!

10. i bet you think about me by taylor!! or any beabadoobee somg tbh

11. any song on young luv by stayc tbh!! or still with you by jk (does that count?

12. @yeokii my queen @yizmiu @euncsace @weoris @kazmura

13. pink, coquette (SORRY)

14. i LOVE hersheys cookie and cream things and really anything chocolate-y but not too chocolate-y yk?

will do !! thank youuu ^_^

[zatdummesmadchen]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers 💜💜

*gasps* of course!!! Tyvm!!! I don't have many friends but I could tag some of my mutuals who might or might not like me (*^-゜)vThanks! In no particular order:

CATS !!!!

adorable creatures. can do wrong. very spicy, sweet, and have lots of personality. stupid af but very elegant. they are so silly :3 and do funny tricks, which is very thearatic. very much love. come in many shapes, forms, and colours. I love the ones that look completely moronic.

Look at these idiots. pure beauty. They have nothing in their brains ‼️‼️‼️ ofc I luv beauty/sad cats too, I just relate more to these dumbpussies.

Reading/watching

I love reading anything basically, mythologies, psychology, myths, different cultures, planets, stars, biology, sometimes politics especially when it comes to human rights and class systems, novels and fanfics, especially when it's dark, raw, messy. Wish I had made a list but my life is such a mess that I can't keep track of things the way I wish I could.... but!!! I love silly slow romances, yknow victorian or Christian vibes because the stakes are so high that makes you go- Ooooooooh I see u honhon. Love cultural and ancient romances, desi, East Asian, slavic. It doesn't even have to be about romance. I just love knowing about different things!!!! Especially countries.

Also watching. Space videos, myths & legends, horror, thriller, dark shows. I just don't really get the time to watch things... also many animes!!!

Food/cooking/bake

FOOD!!!! Seafood, vegetables, chicken, meat, dairy whatever!!! Make it flavorful and spicy and I will eat it 😋 especially trying new food or making it from different cultures. I don't have any allergies hehe and am not picky. I would also love to bake and make many things one day!!! And share it with my family or friends mostly. Also new drinks!!!

I want to make this cute recipe book, mostly some from my mom's/dad's cooking and add some stuff from different cultures !!! And basically pass it down to my children so they can try it too.

Hmm. Next.... Writing??? Editing???

Okay, so I do love writing stuff, poems, drafts, my own opinions, stories, and fanfics, and I love!! Making my posts look decent, at the very least. Some aesthetic edits and posts!!! I think it can be stressful, though, especially when there isn't much engagement or my brain is mushy, but I still love it in a way. I love playing with pictures, coming up with colour combinations, and all. It just... It feels nice. Especially because I like my thoughts to look orderly, neat. Otherwise, I genuinely feel like losing my mind.

This is embrassing but.... conversations, comments, thoughts

I actually really like it when people want to share their thoughts with me, their ideas and opinions, maybe just some asks even. No matter how silly it is. I like talking with people, even though it can be so anxious because I low-key think that everyone is out to get me lmaoooo. But yeah, I like it when someone takes some time to talk with me, even if it's just a tag on a bizarre meme. It makes me feel connected with others. Embrassing to admit it tbh pfft.

There are many more things but meh I will end it here!!! Thank you very much for this ask ☆ ✨️🌻🐝

[fanfiction4sooya]

thanksies, i guess this isnt really a problem its like making me confused..so i have a problem in school(yes im a minor im so sorry😔) i like this one girl whos like 1 yr older than me, i really like her and i kind of stalked her ig acc and i knew that she likes aespa..and since it was almost time for school holidays, i decided to confess but, i used my other account and tried to be someone else just to see something..i said "hey i like you, its ok if u dont accept because im only letting my feelings out, i also wanted to tell you that (my name) likes you too but didnt want to confess to you." i kind of exposed myself so it wont look obvious, her friends have beef with me for some reason..and then she replied with "oh im straight" and i was like okay...then i told myself to move on and i did..then when school reopened, she starts searching for me, looking at me, staring, making eye contact with me. and tbh she would even follow me sometimes..i dont want to be called delulu but i know what i saw..and i want your honest opinion on this..

also im sorry if this confused you i didnt really know how to explain😞

Oh honey bun... I am sorry you are going through those tough things.

Well, there's a few ways this could go down. I understand you secretly telling your feelings, you tested the waters; but since you've done it anonymously these looks and stares might be of:

1- Confusion as to why the "person" who told her about your feelings did that in the first place (like she might be asking who of your friends would tell on you like that). I know if it was me I'd feel bad for you having someone in your life willing to tell a major secret like that;

2- Since you told me you are a minor (btw, don't take any of my works to life or interact with them please) she probably is one too or 18 ish, she might not be out yet. You know, it's hard to getting accepted and if that's the case she might be trying to hide it or not show too much and jump into conclusions. Everyone has their own pace when it comes to coming out, not everyone feels safe to do it (understandably so). So try to be friendly if she ever stares at you again and hope for the best. You technically didn't make the first move, someone did it for you so she might be considering if it's true or not. (Also if her friends have something against you she might be scared of going after you and losing her friends or being judged, etc).

3- She is straight and it's staring because now she knows you are a sapphic and in love with her. (Or at least now she suspects it, since there's no confirmation on your part)

Well, that's it. I think patience is key in things like this, specially because you are young and so is she. Just don't let her "rejection" get too much in your mind. It's hard being a teenager, I know, but try your hardest to not run straight into dangerous situations when it comes to dating someone of the same gender as you.

I hope I was of any help, luv 💖💖 and please keep your chin up, hun. There's plenty of girls out there, try to be as confident as you can!!

(if someone has any helpful advice or feels like correcting me on something, please let me know)

[saetoru]

Teeee luv🫶🏽🫶🏽

Missed you so much loves. Project manager tee be sailing well i hear😤😤

Also, a guyyy👀👀 . Finance major. Im praying he don’t turn out like the crypto finance bro I might have to shoot him for your safety. it’s like an infestation in the finance major 😭😭 but soo happy for you luv can’t wait to hear more updates😘

a small tee time with you- I got this guy on my metabolism class- he does slam poetry, loves Gojo and he also writes. I missed a day’s worth of class and he checks up on me like- boy calm down. We like connected via books and writings and I showed him some of my pieces. He said he’s very impressed by my writings🫣 and if im up for a library date and im not tryna be delulu and trying to date guys from same uni but boy he is just ticking ☑️ a lot from my checklist what im gonna do 😭😭😭

Should I risk my 5feet ass, still an independent, girlboss era-

Anyways luv youuu so much so glad to have you back alive in my dash 🫶🏽

HIIIII BFF I MISSED U TOOOO 💋 project manager tee is girlbossing and slaying away hehe

BUT YESSS he’s a finance major and he’s rly funny and cute and he has plants—3 succulents and a lil bamboo tree in his room and he sends me pics and they’re rly cute and i am practically his wife 😍 but yeah i’m hoping he’s a good type of finance major 💀

ALSO THAT GUY LOW KEY SOUNDS LIKEMA CATCH like a man who writes and likes gojo :O u don’t find a lot of those :O maybe u can hang out with him a bit more and see where it goes omg and lmk what happens !!!! i say give it a shot only bc i am also in my romance attempt era of life again — tee is finally (mostly) over her ex !! he’s history now. old news. a jackass we got over !! so now i’m putting myself out there (a little) LMAO so join me in shooting our shots

MWAH kissing u hehe have a nice day 💋