#Joshua dun x reader fanfic

[j-jinxee]

JOSH THOUGHTS -☆

NSFW under the cut! [warnings - general sex thoughts]

Thinking about Josh, how he can't keep his hands to himself. How fucking good it'd feel with just his hands, all over you. The way he touches you like no other, how he holds you all night, whether that be through unconsciousness or through an orgasm. He's so good at getting you to focus on nothing but him, your senses immediately crowded by every aspect of him. His hands lace every inch of your body while you desperately plead for him to stop teasing and just fuck you already.

And when he finally does, holy fuck he's so pretty. No matter much he makes you blush, how much you wanna look away, you just can't. You're completely infatuated with him as he hits all the perfect spots, so deep inside you. You see his pupils blow wider with each thrust, completely hypnotised by the feeling. Your hands find their way to his toned back, leaving rough red marks as your nails drag down his skin. The sight of his arms and shoulders flexing as he keeps himself hovering over you, it only gets you closer and closer. He's slow — and deep, only ever fucking you hard and fast if you ask him to. He prefers the intimacy of slowly working you to the edge while you're fixated on his eyes and the uneven rhythm of his breathing.

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I like this style of just like yapping instead of like full one shots yk lmao I'm just lazy 🫶🏻🫶🏻 anyway new TØP song soon woohoooo

[oldiesstationlover11607]

Hello,

I was wondering if maybe you could write some sort of fluffy story with torchbearer Josh. Maybe something angsty/fluffy, like reader being worried about him before the Banditos go to do the big fight at Dema in Paladin Strait? If not, that’s okay too. No pressure. I’m just happy I found someone writing TØP on this site.

We're Going Back - Torchbearer!Josh Dun x GN!Reader

Pairing: TorchbearerJosh x Gender Neutral Bandito Reader

Warnings: Some swearing, anxiety/panic attacks, fight between Josh and Reader (reader actually is mean guys) There's fluff at the end tho!!

Word Count: 1523 (a nice long one for you anon)

Summary: When Reader finds out that Clancy and Torchbearer are going back into Dema she does everything she can to prevent it.

A/N: I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it anon. Please feel free to request more because I honestly love writing for twenty one pilots. And requests are what help keep me writing I-/

Note - some of this is headcannon for the purposes of making the story work

The day Clancy and I left Dema, I knew there was no going back. It just wasn’t happening. We’d managed to escape together. He’d been outside the walls alone before but during the annual assemblage he’d convinced me to ‘tag along’ as he’d put it. We’d been close friends growing up in Dema, that was just the way it was. Things changed once we left. I remember the day I met the Torchbearer, Josh. It took a lot longer than I thought it would to learn his name. For reasons unknown; he'd kept it a secret known only by his closest friends (or in my case, girlfriend). Clancy and I had only spent a few weeks at the Bandito camp before he was recaptured. He was gone for years. While I knew Josh was looking out for him, I knew exactly what kind of pain Clancy was going through. It was Dema. Josh hadn’t grown up within the walls like Clancy and I, things were different for him, he didn’t know what he was getting himself into. Which was why when he reunited with Clancy and brought him back to the camp, my panic attacks started.

“Oh god you look so different,” I cried into Clancy’s shoulder, “are you okay? I mean, of course you’re not. You’re back.” He nodded quietly, I could feel the tightness of his body in my arms. “What’s wrong?” I asked. 

“We’re going back in,” he voiced bluntly, looking at Josh who nodded knowingly. This wasn’t happening. Clancy wasn’t going back, he’d just gotten out. He’d just been forced against his own will to create propaganda for the very institution that nearly killed us. Not to mention Josh hadn’t been physically in the city for longer than a few hours before. Of course they weren't going in there. Right? 

“You should go get some rest before we start preparations,” Josh said, clearly noticing the shocked look on my face. “It’s good to have you back, Clancy.” Clancy’s eyes darted to mine before he walked toward the tent that had been empty for years. Josh and I were left alone, standing in the middle of the camp. 

“You said we,” I muttered. 

“I did,” he replied, looking at me carefully. He’d grown used to the constant nightmares I’d had about my time in Dema and worries about Clancy. “You know why we're doing this,” He said. His tone made it clear he was  stating the obvious.

“You’re going with him,” I could feel my head throbbing as I grabbed his hand tightly. Josh looked at me, a quiet sigh escaping him while he led me to our private tent. 

“Of course I am.” He said matter of factly; like he never would have even considered another option. We sat down, his arms wrapping around my torso, the brightly coloured tattoo sleeve peeking out under his shirt. 

“It’s not safe and you goddamn know it Josh,” my voice trembled as I remembered my time in the city. All I could think about was how isolating and cold it was. Josh almost chuckled, despite the fact that the situation really wasn’t funny.

“I’m aware it’s dangerous,” He retorted, his hand resting on his forehead before he looked at me again,“I’m not gonna let him go in there alone.” 

“The bishops will kill you the second they see you, and then what? The rebellion is over. Both of our leaders will be dead, the banditos will be killed and everyone will have lost.” Josh was getting frustrated now, his grip on me loosening with every exchange. He didn’t want to be having this conversation, I could tell, but he knew if he tried to walk away I’d just follow him.

“That’s not going to happen. We have a plan, we’ll be fine,” He said, his voice full of empty hope. I knew what I was about to say when I said it, I knew I was firing a shot. One I’d been keeping in till I needed to use it. 

“Oh and how did your last ‘plan’ turn out Josh? What with Clancy being recaptured and forced to write SAI?” He dropped his arms from me and moved away so he was sitting directly in front of me. 

“Don’t.” He snapped, a hand raising and pointing at me. “Don’t bring that up.” He clenched his teeth, his jaw tightening as anger and frustration was starting to overtake his mind. I had to fight the urge to continue throwing emotional bullets his way. I was going to make it clear to him that it was dangerous in Dema, that he couldn’t go, regardless of whether or not it hurt our relationship. Because I loved him and I couldn’t lose any more than I already had. 

“Why not?” I challenged him, “It was your plan.”

“You think I don’t know that?!” he exhaled, his whole body tense now as he yelled. “You don’t think I lay awake at night thinking it’s all my fault Clancy was captured?” His fists were clenched, he was fighting the urge to punch something. Maybe himself, maybe a wall. He closed his eyes and took a couple deep breaths, trying to calm himself like he’d taught me when I’d had nightmares. He looked like he was about to check out for the rest of the day, what I’d said really had an impact on him. “Stop,” He managed to mutter, still fighting to stay in control of his emotions.

“Okay,” I nodded. I knew exactly how he’d felt about Clancy and SAI. I knew he thought it was his fault so he spent every waking hour with Clancy, making sure he could get back safely. I knew he blamed himself, not only for Clancy’s time back in Dema but also for hurting me. He hated himself so much already and hearing me remind him of what he thought about himself all the time was making him feel terrible. He swallowed hard, his eyes darting for a moment before he finally spoke again, his voice shaky. “Just stop… please..”

I reached out to hold him, “I’m sorry, I went too far Josh.” He rested his head into the crook of my neck, quiet sobs filling the air. He melted at my touch, his arms wrapping around me and pulling me closer as he held back sobs.

“Please,” He eventually muttered, “Please don’t hate me.”

“I could never hate you, I’m just scared. I don’t want you or Clancy leaving me again, I can't take any more losses,” I pressed my lips to his temple. 

“I know, I know,” He mumbled, his eyes squeezed shut as he was trying to compose himself. I continued to hold him tightly, not wanting to ever let go. “I’m scared too,” he added, his voice quiet. Eventually he pulled back and looked at me, his eyes slightly bloodshot from crying. He took a deep breath, still trying to keep hold of whatever composure he could. “We’ll be fine, I promise,” he mumbled, but even I could tell he had doubts. 

“You can’t promise that,” I sighed. 

“Watch me,” he replied sternly, though the shakiness in his voice didn’t help. He reached a hand out now, a cold palm cupping my chin as his eyes met mine. “I promise, we’ll come back. You have my word.” He leaned in, resting his forehead against mine for a few moments. 

“If I lose you, I need you to know that you're the best thing to ever happen to me, Torchbearer.” I tried desperately to come to terms with the fact that I was going to have to let him go.

“Don’t talk like that,” He whispered, “Not like you’re already saying good-bye to me.” I cupped his face gently, pressing my lips to his in an attempt to wade off tears. He melted into the kiss, gripping his hands at my sides as he held onto me. He deepened the kiss, his head tilting so the angle was better as he pulled me closer. I would’ve been happy to stay here if it meant him not having to leave. We pulled back as the fabric of the tent rustled, Clancy entering. We pulled back as the fabric of the tent rustled, Clancy entering. 

“It's time to start packing supplies and getting the others ready if we want to make it on time.” With a slight exhale Josh pulled away, turning to look at Clancy and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah we need to get moving,” he mumbled, his hands letting me go.

“Josh?” I called, catching him just before he followed Clancy outside.

He turned to look at me again, a hint of concerned look plastered onto his face. 

“Yeah?” He replied, his voice quiet.

“You better keep that promise.” I desperately attempted to hold back my sobs, knowing full well that as soon as one slipped I was a goner. 

“I will,” he whispered, taking a step closer to me again. “I’ll come back.” With careful hands he reached out and wiped away a stray tear that was rolling down my cheek. “I’ll always come back to you.”

//

Please submit any requests y'all have! I love to write so let me know if you've got any!

[z0mbiekisses]

part one- if i can change i hope i never know.

jasmine’s life was predictable. to say the least. she had a steady routine going on. her days often blended together, until good day dema came into production. jasmine was in charge of the show. well, not completely. there was always someone above her, it was dema after all. it was different. the set was filled with bright pastels. good day dema was created to dismiss the claims “clancy” made. propaganda. jasmine knew the was all an illusion, she’s seen the gray walls day after day. hell, one of the biggest rules about dema was no music. so it definitely surprised jasmine to hear they’re forcing tyler to write an entire album. jasmine knew deep down it was suspicious. but jasmine didn’t have a choice. jasmine didn’t have options, this was the life planned for her. jasmine didn’t know about anything else. sure, she’s heard of “the outside”. but this was her life, and she just accepted it because what else was she going to do?

jasmine was waiting backstage in a dressing room for tyler to show up. to be honest, she didn’t know much about him. jasmine knew he betrayed nico and escaped from dema. jasmine never read the letters or anything, it didn’t catch her interest. she often kept to herself the best she could. trying to get through each day. jasmine did feel bad that he was being forced to do this show, but she supposed there were worse ways to be punished. jasmine didn’t understand the severity of it all. oblivious of the reality. jasmine was snapped out of her thoughts as tyler walked into the room.

“hello tyler, i’m jasmine. i’ll be taking care of you today.”, she smiled reaching her hand out for him to shake. his face was blank, emotionless. which wasn’t unusual here in dema. there was never any true joy or any feelings around. just blank slates and coldness.

jasmine took in his appearance as he shook her hand. their brown eyes meeting briefly. she took interest in his soft brown curls. jasmine almost felt sad that she’d have to turn it into a bright pastel pink. she admired it for a moment before leading tyler over to a chair.

“okay so i have these two shades of pink, one is more softer and the other is brighter.”, jasmine held up the two bottles of dye to tyler. he looked confused.

“you’re asking me?”, tyler raised his eyebrow. jasmine laughed dryly at his skepticism.

“well yeah.. it’s your hair after all.”, but tyler wasn’t phased. he just rolled his eyes.

“just get this over with it.”, jasmine was a bit surprised by his short response. but jasmine understood he wasn’t too happy about the situation. they were both aware they had to make the bishops happy. they both didn’t have a say in anything. she mixed the bleach and began to lightly coat his hair. it was quiet at first, jasmine wasn’t much for conversation. she never knew how to start them.. or carry them. but she did know how to finish them.

“have you ever dyed your hair before?”, tyler spoke up. jasmine nodded her head.

“only a strand of my hair blue. that was before i was ordered to take it out.”, jasmine shared. she was happy tyler was trying to talk to her.

“blue is a pretty color.”, tyler commented.

“blue is my favorite color.”, jasmine smiled. it was hard having a favorite color that was pretty much forbidden. but the blue skies always spoke to jasmine. especially at night when the stars would light up. reminding her that she wasn’t alone at the end of the day. or the paladin strait she could see in the distance. tyler nodded, taking mental note of it. after jasmine finished with the bleach, it was quiet again. jasmine didn’t want to wait the 30 minutes in silence. so she decided to turn on the radio. though of course, the only songs it played were scaled and icy.

“sorry.. it must be weird hearing your own voice.”, jasmine laughed lightly. fidgeting with the silver bracelets on her wrist.

“it’s okay, i’m used to it.. i just wish they were MY songs.”, tyler sighed. jasmine was confused by this response.

“your songs?”

“well i made them, but these aren’t my thoughts.. my feelings. it’s what the bishops told me to sing.”, jasmine listened to tyler. that didn’t sound unusual for the bishops. jasmine was just happy she was able to actually enjoy music. jasmine felt bad for tyler, she could tell this was hard for him. tyler had songs that actually were true to him. but of course, they were absolutely forbidden here.

“well for what it’s worth, you have a great voice.”, jasmine complimented. which made tyler smile. jasmine spent the rest of the time listening to the album while she finished up on tyler’s hair. they actually had light conversations. it was the first time in god knows how long jasmine was able to actually enjoy a conversation with someone.

“here’s your mic pack, in-ears all that stuff. i’ll come back in 10 minutes before you go on.”, jasmine gestured over to the small vanity. as she was about to walk out, tyler spoke.

“jasmine, a gift from god.”, jasmine turned around. her name spoke a lot about her character. jasmine and tyler were on two entirely different ends of their place in dema. while tyler was this traitor, jasmine was highly praised. the bishops often favored her. though, jasmine was unsure why. she knew it had something to do with her family. they had a close history with the bishops. but jasmine knew it had to be more than that. her privilege was how she ended up being in charge of this whole production.

“yeah, why do you bring it up?”, jasmine raised her eyebrows. tyler just shrugged. tyler was taking into account how different they were; at least on that level. part of him wished he could leave dema WITH jasmine. to be able to show her the truth. but tyler wasn’t even sure he’d be able to leave again.

jasmine could hear in her own in ear she was needed somewhere. so she left tyler alone. eventually she came back to let him know it was 5 minutes before showtime. tyler was just sitting there, staring at the blank white wall. jasmine felt unusually sad for him. it was rare where she was put in situations where she felt these kinds of emotions. everytime she expressed them it didn’t end well. she was quite unsure how to handle it. but with tyler, she felt different. he was different. she sat on the couch next to tyler.

“pre-show jitters?”, jasmine suggested.

“i guess you can say that.”, jasmine gave tyler a small smile.

“i look forward to hearing you perform.”, jasmine’s eyes met tyler’s. there was a small spark. which was the first jasmine had seen. jasmine was normally intimated by eye contact. but with tyler, it didn’t feel threatening. both jasmine & tyler heard it was time to head up on set. jasmine could tell tyler was disappointed.

jasmine rushed around, making sure everything was perfect. she looked down at the checklist on her clipboard. on the leather couch was an older gentleman & woman. tyler barely mumbled a word to them. to be completely honest, even jasmine was confused on who these people were. but, jasmine knew better not to ask questions. not anymore. the countdown started for the show to air.

3.

2.

1.

i know it’s hard to believe me but it’s a good day.

jasmine watched as the bright lights shined on the golden set. the yellow coated walls were vibrant & would practically radiate off the screen. exactly how it was supposed to be. jasmine watched as the two hosts talked, and tyler sat in the middle. however, he didn’t even look up at the camera. it was almost as if he was trapped in his own head. tyler didn’t even react to the hosts comments about his band name. tyler was just.. there. jasmine knew tyler didn’t want to be there. but this didn’t feel right. jasmine couldn’t focus on that though. this was what the bishops wanted. this was her job. she had to stay focus. besides, he only had one song to sing. soon enough this would be over. jasmine went off to grab the scaled and icy discs for the hosts to advertise. when she came back, the hosts looked different. the had wounds on their faces that weren’t there before. jasmine didn’t have time to worry about that. she set up the merch table, and listened as tyler sang.

“i was born a choker.. no one’s coming for me.”

jasmine was almost entranced by his voice. sure, she didn’t know many songs to compare it to. but she always loved listening to tyler. his voice easing the stress and worry she was facing. she loved listening to scaled and icy, even if tyler wasn’t too fond of it. it brought her comfort. a rare thing for jasmine. there was a pause and that’s when she called over the hosts to the merch table. jasmine noticed their eyes were both yellow. it was off-putting to say the least. but she moved over off camera & waited for them to begin the commercial break. she walked over to tyler who now looked.. sad?

“hey, told you you’d do great.”, jasmine smiled at him. trying her best to make him feel better. tyler still looked down at the ground.

“are you happy here?”, tyler asked, looking into her eyes. it was a sudden question. but tyler needed to know where exactly jasmine’s head was at.

“what else is there?”, jasmine answered honestly.

“trench.”, tyler spoke again. it was engraved in jasmine’s’ mind that there was nothing outside the dema walls for her, or anyone. and people who escape are merely fools leading themselves to slaughter. that’s what she was taught.

“i have everything i need here.”, jasmine answered simply. though, it felt more as if she was reading off a script.

“i promise, there’s more than this. you can do better.”, tyler tried to explaining to her. but this wasn’t an easy thing for her to hear. how was she supposed to believe tyler?

“and yet you’re still here.”, jasmine replied coldly. tyler frowned, his sad demeanor creeping back. he knew trying to convince jasmine to leave everything behind would be difficult. but he has to try. tyler knew jasmine deserved better then whatever this shitty place had to offer. it was time for tyler to finish his part of the show. jasmine walked away off set. she was taking apart the merch table as tyler finished singing. letting tyler’s soft voice help bring her some peace.

CUT!

jasmine went to go dismiss everyone from the set, but as she walked up she saw the two hosts bodies laying on the ground. their faces now fully wounded and bruised. their skin much paler than it once was. jasmine’s stomach felt ill. they were dead. the two people who were just up hosting a morning show were lying dead on the floor.

BAM!

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔

hiiii guys!!^^ i hope you enjoyed the first part of this series. like ive mentioned, this will be a shorter story if you will, however ive been very into the lore & stuff. plus im a big maladaptive daydreamer so!!! i’ll try my best to update when i can! thank you for reading it means so much!!!:3

- v 🩶

[dunstory]

Yellow

Pairing: Josh Dun x Reader

Warnings: Anxiety, Panic Attack, Fluff

A/N: sooo, this is my first writing ever! all of this came from a dream i had last may, so i thought i could turn this into an imagine. also, there is a lot of lowercases because im to lazy to correct… sorry!! hope yall enjoy, feedback is appreciated!!

gif is not mine!

yellow, white and red lights came from everywhere. it was happening, the first twenty one pilots convention ever. there were some people with their yellow tapes and bandanas, some with their red beanies and white glasses, even some people cosplaying as the bishops.

everything looked great. unfortunately, you weren't able to stay with josh in the backstage because him and tyler had a lot of interviews to attend and stuff. so you had the chance to explore the convention as yourself. as a clikkie that you first were, not just as Josh Dun's girlfriend. of course, some people recognized you and asked for pictures, which you happily accepted.

you spent most of your time at the stand where the clikkies were playing their tøp covers. you were amazed by their talent and passion, it was just fascinating. you even got yourself to play heavydirtysoul on the drums with another dude, you never felt so cool.

and then it was time. their special concert was about to start. As you arrived to the area, the majority of the fans that were already there recognized you and insisted for you to stay in the front row. at first everything was great, until you actually went to your saved place and started hearing some comments about you.

"she's just not it."

"she doesn't belong here."

"i don't claim her."

"josh deserves WAY better than this."

"she's a whore. she only wants his money."

to say that you're insecure is an understatement, but you could deal with it occasionally, josh knew everything about it and was always there for you.

except for now.

all the overheard voices ignited a bad feeling that you forgot you ever had. it was it. 3 minutes before your boyfriend concert, and you were about to have a panic attack. you were glad that there were chairs for everyone, so you sat and breathed deeply and slowly, as you always practiced. you thought you were going to be ok, until a girl a few rows behind you yelled:

"look how excited she is for her boyfriend's concert!oh my god. she's the only one seated."

you were about to say something back until someone else yelled

"that bitch must be pregnant! she just wanted his baby so he could give her all his money, i am sure."

dear. lord.

"why didn't I just stay home" played repeatedly in your head. but you had to focus on josh, after all, you were there for him.

and just as you calmed down, the lights came to a halt and the concert started. to be honest, you were really glad that it was a pocket show so the boys couldn't interact that much physically with the crowd because the constant movement and yelling was making you dizzy and more overwhelmed by every second, so you were glad that josh wouldn't be able to se your visibly uncomfortable face.

you loved the boys' concerts, you truly did. but you just couldn't wait for this one to finish, to be honest.

at this point, you couldn't even pay attention to tyler's singing, you just had to focus on keeping yourself on its place. considering that you were on the verge of having a panic attack and you couldn't dare to sit down while you're feeling dizzy, nauseous and slowly losing your conscience.

gladly, you could still cry. people would just think that you were thrilled. so that's what you did. you ugly cried until you heard the last screams of "hello" from tyler, meaning that trees was about to end and so was the concert. you couldn't even believe it when the music came to a halt and all you could hear was screams and applauses. these were surely the longest 50 minutes of your life.

as the boys came to the front to bow, josh started to look for you and as he found your eyes, his heart dropped. he knew you too well. he knew you weren't crying because of the concert, bur yes because of something else, most likely your anxiety got the best of you.

he was feeling so bad for you, for having left you alone and now seeing you in this state. he felt and the guilty over him. in a matter of seconds, after tyler said "we're twenty one pilots and so are you" he whispered something in a rush in his ear and he nodded, giving him the permission to run to you.

as he reached you, you started crying even more. you were too overwhelmed at this point. he then grabbed your hands firmly and asked "hey, hey, easy. are you ok?" and you shook your head weakly, feeling like you wouldn't last too long.

"ok, do you think you can jump this grid?" he asked and you nodded with a weak smile. with a help of two securities and the strong arms of your loved one, you made it to his arms. he grabbed you in bridal style and rushed out of the convention center, while kissing your forehead.

at this point, you were crumbling completely, letting all your feelings out. you were embarrassed, nervous, overwhelmed but above all, relieved for being finally in the arms of the man you loved the most. when you arrived outside, josh sat on the floor with you on his arms. he held you tightly, never wanting to let you go, he loved you so much that he couldn't put into words, so he demonstrated with actions, all the time.

and the same goes for you, you adored him, you never felt such as a thing as you felt your love for josh, it was overwhelming, but in good way actually.

he didn't ask you any questions. he just held you, kissing your forehead, massaging your back and eventually taking your hair out of your face. he stayed in silence with you, just gesturing with his hands the breathing exercises that you both had been practicing. once he made sure your breath was controlled, he just made his magic.

"and it was all yellow..." he sang lowly, only enough for you and him to listen.

it was like the whole world stopped, and it was just you and him. he forgot about his problems and commitments, even the meet&greet's that were about to happen after the show, he forgot they existed, his priority was you and you only.

"your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones..." he kept singing, shyly but doing it all for you.

you couldn't believe this, your favorite song being sang by your favorite person. he knew just the right buttons to press to make you feel like yourself again. you could feel your tears slowly drying and you smiled weakly against his chest, feeling the comfort you could never get tired of. feeling your smile encouraged josh to sing louder, as a way to also express his feelings, especially what he felt for you.

"turn in to something beautiful..."

you knew it wasn't going to be the last time you were going to hear his pretty voice sing. now that you knew that he would do this for you, you would always get the best of it. at this point, you were almost crying of joy. he was too sweet for you.

"do you know, you know i love you so.."

now, you had forgotten about the last one and a half hours of your life. you were back into your reality, where you felt good and happy, all of this because you had this yellow headed smiley boy by your side, always. to make an honor to him, you got all the strength you had left after crying a river and sang the last verse with him.

"you know i love you so... much." you nearly whispered the last word.

as he heard your tired voice, josh looked down at you with pure love in his eyes, that face that once was full of concern was now relaxed again, as the smile that he loved so much was returned to you.

all you knew was that you're going to be okay, it didn't matter what'd have to deal later in social media and press. you were okay, and while Josh was by your side, you'd always be. no matter what. even if he was comforting you from a panic attack in the middle of a sidewalk. it was just okay. after all, for him, you'd bleed yourself dry. and so would him for you.

[beanfic]

I was doing fine...

Pairing: Josh Dun x reader

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: Angst

Summary: You were doing fine, you truly were, that was until he showed up on your front porch

Author’s note: I feel like I haven’t written angst angst in a while, so I did this? I hope you enjoy it! Feedback is appreciated :)

“What are you doing here, Josh?” You say sternly, your hands resting on your hips. Your eyebrows furrow as you glare at the boy standing on your front doorstep. The rain patters behind him, splashing upon his ankles. His curly brown hair lays in front of his eyes from the weight of the water. His eyes carry guilt.

“I need to talk to you, Y/N, please let me inside.” He wipes his forehead with his sweatshirt sleeve. Half of your body is hiding behind of the door as you peek around. 

“I don’t know if that is the best,” you mumble, closing the door a little bit more. Josh sighs as he leans over and peers into the crack between the door and the frame. His brows eyes connect with yours, and suddenly you’re drawn in once again. 

“Please.” His voice was barely audible, but you still can hear it. You nod softly and pull the door open, allowing room for Josh to enter. Your eyes are still locked with his. You are not able to look away from his gaze. You drop your hands from the door and slowly takes a step back into the entryway. Josh shuts the door softly behind him. 

“Do you want to go to sit?” You eventually are able to peel your eyes away from his and glance over at the couch in your cozy living room. The sight of the couch brought back the memory of your first kiss that you shared with Josh. It was two years ago, and it was raining, just like tonight. He had invited you to go to the drive in to see one of the newest horror movies that had just been released, but the weather had other plans. Making the term rain check become literal, you two decided on heading back to your place to spend the rest of the night. He showed up with pizza and cookie dough, and make you laugh effortlessly the entire time. You remember how he had asked you to dance to a song that was playing on the record player, and your arms were wrapped around his neck. He had asked to kiss you, making sure you were comfortable with that, and it was one of the best ‘first’ kisses you had ever had.

“Y/N?” Josh’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You see him already sitting down on the couch, arms resting on his knees, and he was fiddling with the hem on his sleeve. “Are you going to come sit down?”

“Yeah.” You brush your hair out of your face and slowly step towards the couch. Not wanting to sit too close to Josh, you sit as far away as possible. The room is quiet, except for the raindrops prickling on the windows and the soft breaths coming from Josh. 

“I need to tell you I’m sorry. I know I have told you this many times, but we ended our relationship on not so good terms and I don’t want it to be like that,” he begins to speak. The words ‘ended our relationship’ ring in your ears, and your eyes glaze over as reality hits you like a brick. About a week ago, Josh had confessed that the relationship was taking up too much of his time, and it was not healthy for him to continue being in a relationship at the moment. No matter how many times he reminded you that it wasn’t your fault and that it was just timing of life, you didn’t believe him. You tried your hardest to forget about the breakup the past week by keeping yourself busy with picking up extra shifts at work and working on your latest hobby project.

“Ended,” you murmur. The word feels foreign on your lips. 

“Y/N, I know how hard it must have been for you, and I truly am sorry for breaking your hard. This past week must have been-”

“I was fine,” you cut him off. You glance over at him and notice that his eyes are wet with tears.

“What?” 

“I said I was fine. I was doing perfectly fine this past week. Actually, I have been fine until you showed up.” The familiar knot begins to form in your throat, warning you that tears are about to come. You swallow hard and look down at the ground. 

“I should have known, you are the strongest person I have ever met.”  His words are filled with honesty, and you have to shut your eyes hard to keep yourself from crying. You can tell he notices you are about to cry because he shifts in his seat so his knees are facing you. You feel his hand rest on your knee, rubbing small circles into your skin. 

“It’s not like I don’t want to see you, Josh. I’m just trying my hardest to understand and be respectful of you. Of course, I’m broken. I love you and it’s killing me inside that we can’t be together.” 

“I love you too, Y/N, and that is why I want the best for you, you know that. I’m touring so much and it’s not fair for you or me. The time,”

“Is just not right,” you finish the sentence for him. It is not the first time you have hard that come from his mouth. “I understand, Josh. I just need to be okay with it. I just don’t think I can wait around for you.”

“I’m not asking for you to wait around for me, Y/N. I want you to be happy, and that means living life the way you want and to the fullest capacity. Please promise me that you will go and live.”

You sigh and wipe your eyes, “Yes, Josh, I promise I will go and live my life. I’ll always be here if you need something though, okay? I’ll always love you, even if it just platonic.”

“I love you too, Y/N. I’m really sorry, again.”

“Please no more apologies,” you let out a small laugh. “It really is only making this harder. I mean it that I was doing fine before you showed up.”

“Should I leave?” Josh asks.

“I think it would be easier for both of us if you leave, I mean it seems like we are on good terms, right?” 

Josh nods, “Yeah, I agree.” He stands up from the couch, and once you meet height with him he pulls you in for a hug. You wrap your arms around his torso and take in his familiar scent. 

“I’m going to miss you, Joshua,” you mumble into his chest. 

“I’ll miss you too, Y/N.” He pulls away from you but stops with his left hand on your shoulder. His brown eyes are looking into yours, and you shyly smile up at him. You watch him back up towards the door, opening it and stepping outside. You follow, resting your hand on the doorframe. Josh stopped right before taking the last step towards your driveway and looked over his shoulder. His eyebrows crumbled together as he softly smiled as if he was trying to bid farewell without words.

“Bye, Josh.” You continue to keep your strength and not cry as you watch him get into his car and drive away. You wish he said bye with words, but maybe it was best that his last words were that he will miss you, and not the reality of saying goodbye. 

You close the front door and rest your back against the wood. Taking a deep breath, you place your face into your hands and let out a scream. You weren’t sure why your body had chosen anger over sadness as the emotion to with his departure, but you didn’t fight it. It was surprisingly making it easier to accept the fact that Josh was gone, and you most likely were never going to see him again

[spookyjiimfanfiction]

Epilogue

Tear In My Heart | Series Masterlist

Warnings: Fluff of the highest extremity

Word Count: 1625

Authors’ Note: I can’t believe that this is the last chapter for this series! It’s been such a great run and we love you all so much for showing your support! Hope you love it as much as we did! :) (picture credit)

Epilogue - June 2019 - End of the Bandito Tour

Jenna: Let's be cute today! Put on your cutest sundress and I'm going to be there in thirty to pick you up for a girl's day. We're getting our nails done!

That was the text that you had received less than ten minutes ago as you tore through your clothes in the closet that you shared with Josh. Finding the yellow sundress that you had instantly thought of, you quickly changed into it and slipped on some wedges that went perfectly with the color scheme you were going for. You did your makeup in record time, still making sure that it was perfect before moving to your hair, pulling it halfway up and into a cute messy bun. Spraying some perfume on to finalize your look, you heard the doorbell ring - instantly knowing that it was Jenna. Jim, who had been laying on the bed as you got ready, lifted his head up curiously as he heard it and instantly ran down the hall.

You made your way behind him and grabbed your cellphone and purse, hurrying over to the front door. Opening the door to reveal a smiley Jenna, you giggled a bit at her and then pulled her in for a big hug.

"Hey, you! I'm just going to leave Josh a note that I'll be leaving to go out with you. Just give me a second. I'll meet you out there."

"Okay, hurry up! We have stuff to do!"

Hurrying back over to your post-it notes, as Jenna reclosed the door to head back to her car, you grabbed a pen and quickly jotted down your location and that you'd be back later. Adding a little heart at the end, you said goodbye to Jim with a pat on his head and exited your home, locking it behind you. You got into her car and the both of you were off to the nail salon.

*     *     *

"You know that I never have my nails longer. They don't make things easy at work."

"I know, but it would be nice to see something different on you. Just to try! If you don't like it after 24 hours, then we can come back and get them fixed."

After thinking on it, you finally decided to give in and try for a bit of a longer nail. You may have budged on the subject, but you weren't going to completely move. After getting your nails done and feeling pampered, you both decided on having lunch at the nearest thai food restaurant. It had been forever since you had eaten it, so it was a never ending craving. You both got to talk about many things, including how life had been, how things were going in both relationships... everything under the sun. When she looked at her watch with a sigh, she looked up to you again and started gathering her trash.

"It's getting a bit late and I promised Ty that I would be back home to cook some dinner. You ready?"

"Yeah, let's go!"

*     *     *

The drive back home was filled with more discussion and light music playing in the background. No matter how much time the both of you spent together, there was never a shortage of things to talk about, and that's one of the many reasons why you loved Jenna. Finally pulling back into your driveway, you smiled to your best friend and leaned over to give her a hug.

"I'll talk to you soon, okay? Thank you so much for today. It was fun!" you exclaimed as you got out of the car to head inside.

With a smirk, she nodded and waved, "You're welcome!"

You watched as Jenna pulled out of the driveway and disappeared around the bend at the end of the street. Once she was out of sight, you grabbed your keys from the depths of the purse and made your way up the path that led to the house. Josh had been pretty quiet in terms of communication today, and you were silently hoping that he was home already so you two could spend the rest of the afternoon together.

Music was the first thing that you heard when you opened the door. You recognized it instantly; it was the song that you and Josh had first danced to at Tyler and Jenna’s wedding, also known as the night that you had fully realized how you felt about Josh. After you had confessed that to him shortly after you started dating, you two had deemed the song that played that night “your song”.

“Hello?” you called as you set your things by the door and kicked off your shoes. “Josh?”

“I’m in here!”

You were relieved to hear his voice. After taking a second to look over your appearance in the mirror and deeming it passable, you followed the sound of the music into the living room. Your heart stopped as soon as you rounded the corner.

Fairy lights were strung all around the room, blinking softly against the walls and furniture, with pictures of you and Josh from the moment you had met to only a few short weeks ago clipped along them. Rose petals were laid out on the ground, creating a path from where you were standing to the middle of the room. There were even a couple of your favorite candles around, adding to the romantic atmosphere. And in the middle of it all was your boys - Josh and Jim - wearing matching black bow ties.

“What’s going on?” you asked, never letting your eyes leave Josh as you grew closer to him. “I didn’t forget an anniversary, did I? Isn’t it in two months?”

“You didn’t forget anything,” Josh smiled. “But you are going to remember something.”

Before you had a chance to ask what he meant, Josh dropped to one knee and pulled out a little black box. Your eyes were brimmed with tears in an instant, hardly able to believe what they were seeing in front of them. Josh was absolutely beaming as he turned the box over in his hands a few times.

“I thought for a long time about how and when and where I wanted to do this, but the one thing I never had to question was why. Y/N, I knew from the moment I laid eyes on you that I was going to fall in love with you and from then on there was no going back. I have fallen in love with every last thing about you, even the parts that you think don’t deserve to be loved. There is nobody else in the world that I would rather spend the rest of my life with. So, Y/N Y/L/N,” he opened the little box and held it out towards you, “will you marry me?”

“Yes,” you barely managed to choke out through the tears. “Of course, Josh.”

Josh’s smile grew even wider, if that was even possible, as he pulled the ring out of the box. You held out your hand and he carefully slipped the ring onto your finger. It was shining in the dim light from the fairy lights. Jim, upon noticing the excitement, was eagerly thumping his tail against the floor.

“I didn’t want to get anything too big so that you could still wear it while you’re working,” Josh explained as he stood back up. “I hope you like it.”

“It’s perfect. Absolutely perfect.”

You finally managed to get your hands on Josh and pulled him into a kiss. His arms wound around your waist, pulling you into the embrace that had provided you with comfort for so many years. He was the first to pull away, but he kept his forehead pressed against yours.

“You look beautiful today, by the way,” he grinned as he wiped away some of your tears with his thumb.

“Thank you.” A familiar heat rose to your cheeks, despite the fact it was a compliment you had heard countless times before. “I love you so much, Josh. This was everything I ever could have dreamed of.”

“I just wanted to make this moment special. I love you to the stars and back and wanted to show you that.”

“You definitely did.”

You kissed him again, but it was interrupted by an all too familiar voice.

“So, it finally happened, huh?”

You spun around in Josh’s arms, still keeping your hands on his shoulders. Tyler was standing just inside the living room with his arms crossed, that same stupid smirk that you had seen so many times before plastered on his face.

“No, Tyler,” you held a finger out towards him, “you do not get to come ruin this moment. You’ve done plenty of that already.”

Josh and Tyler both began to laugh, making you turn back to look at Josh in surprise.

“Y/N, it’s ok. He helped me set all of this up, he’s supposed to be here.”

“You’re sure?”

He smiled, “I’m sure.”

“I’m not the only one who’s here, either.”

Tyler wandered around the corner towards the entryway. He returned shortly after with Jenna, who was trying - and failing - to hide her obvious excitement.

“What’s going on?” you asked.

“Well, I knew that this was going to be a big moment for us,” Josh explained. “And I figured what better way to celebrate it than with our family?”

That was enough to send a fresh wave of tears down your cheeks. You were still in disbelief that you had ended up surrounded by so many wonderful people who cared for you so deeply. People that you now knew would be by your side for the rest of your life.

It was better than you ever could have dreamed of.

*     *     *     *     *

The end?

Taglist

@topownsmyheart​ @faceofcontvsions​ @ohprettyweeper​ @tylersheavydirtysoul​ @svintsandghosts @wearebxnditos​ @breadbinishigh​ @patdsinner33​ @leam-2001

[thepatricktreestump]

Remember: Josh Dun fanfic

A/N: Just a reminder that I’ve gotten all of your requests, it’s just a matter of finding the time to write and post them. But don’t worry, I promise I’ll get to them soon! Love you guys! xoxo

Anonymous said: Hey! May I request a Josh Dun imagine? Maybe like where the reader gets drunk and they come home to Josh and the reader's all like "kiss me" and Josh does but he stops her before they do anything else bc Josh wouldn't take advantage of the reader and it's all cute and shiz lol. Love your writing! :) <3

*gender neutral

Bright lights, fancy awards, elegant attire, loud applause, crisp champagne, a crowd full of people, and your two best friends, it was a night like no other. Ever since Tyler and Josh’s new album hit the top of the charts, they had been busy as hell. Whether award shows, parties, interviews, concerts, touring, music video filming, or just traveling on the road, they always seemed to be the center of attention. It didn’t surprise you that they had won another award, but you were surprised when they decided to go to the after party. Usually they would bow out, decide to go back to the tour bus, and instead, blast music, eat cereal, and do their own little thing. They were never usually ones for parties. But however, winning an award and just finishing tour, going to a grand scale celebrity party must’ve sounded like the perfect way to celebrate. “Come on, y/n,” Josh insisted. “It’ll be fun. We don’t even have to drink or anything, we can just go there, talk to some people, dance for a little bit, that’s all.”

“Just a couple hours,” Tyler agreed.

“I never said I wasn’t going,” you narrowed your eyes. “I’m just double checking that this is really what you guys want to do.”

“Why? You doubt me and my partying abilities?” Tyler playfully gasped, putting a hand to his chest and acting deeply offended. “Believe me, y/n, I can bust a move like nobody knows.”

“Whatever,” you rolled your eyes. “I’m just making sure none of you will chicken out on me halfway through the night.”

“Never,” Tyler shook his head. “I’m on top of the world right now, and I don’t think I want to come down anytime soon. How about you, Josh?”

“Huh?” Josh lifted his head from his phone. “I was just scrolling through the group chat. The party starts in a couple minutes. I’d start heading over now.”

“Teenagers and their phones,” Tyler clicked his tongue.

“I’m researching,” Josh laughed. “I have to find the address somehow.”

It wasn’t long before you guys had arrived, and sure enough, it was just as you had imagined it. There was a plethora of people crowding the dance floor where a professional DJ and live band were playing music, a kitchen equipped with a bar tender serving all sorts of drinks and foods ranging anywhere from a five-foot-tall chocolate fountain to gourmet French fries, a longue where people were smoking and snorting who knows what kind of drugs, and of course, the usual pool table in the corner. “They went all out,” you shouted to Josh over the music as Tyler led you both towards the kitchen.

“Typical party,” he shrugged, putting an arm around you as you approached the bar tender. You and Josh were just friends, but you had to admit, you had a tiny crush on him, and when he put his arm around your shoulder, you couldn’t help but feel a small tug on your heartstrings. You tried to ignore your stupid feelings and took a seat next to Josh before asking for a drink.

“I’ll have a tequila,” you ordered. Josh eyed you strangely. “What?”

“I don’t know,” he tried acting casual. “I think I’m just going to stick to Red Bull tonight.”

“You should have at least one drink,” you argued, thanking the bar tender with a nod as he handed you a glass and you downed a shot. “Loosen up, celebrate, have some fun.”

“I’m already having fun,” he chuckled, popping open the tab of his can before taking a sip. “As long as I’m with you, I’m enjoying myself.”

“Flirt,” you smirked, trying to ignore the blush in your cheeks and ordering another shot. “You sure you don’t want one?”

“Somebody’s going to have to drive us home, remember?” he raised an eyebrow.

“Tyler already agreed to do that on the ride here,” you pointed out. “Here, I’ll order a margarita and you just have a sip or two.”

“Y/n,” Josh began to protest, but you were already waving at the bar tender to hit you up. You started on your next drink and Josh took a deep breath. “Maybe you should pace yourself a little bit. There’s still a lot of the night to go.”

“I’ll be just fine,” you rolled your eyes. That’s when Josh looked down at his phone. “What’s the matter?”

“Mark Hoppus just got here,” Josh explained. “He wants to congratulate me on the award and some stuff, talk for a little bit, catch up. Is it okay if I leave you here?”

“Yup,” you nodded. “I’m not going anywhere!”

“No more drinks,” Josh narrowed his eyes. “Not until I get back anyways, got it? It will only take a couple minutes. Look, Tyler’s right over there talking to Pete Wentz if you need somebody.”

“Don’t worry about me,” you groaned. “Go talk to Mark. I’ll be right here waiting for you.”

“Okay,” Josh complied hesitantly before sliding off his seat, gulping down the rest of his Red Bull, and then heading off to find his friend.

The rest of the night was basically a blur. You remember someone sitting down beside you, either Joe Trohman or Brendon Urie, and they had convinced you to have a couple more drinks. The bar tender had eventually cut you off because you had reached your limit for the night. One of your favorite songs came on and you stumbled onto the dance floor, slurring out the lyrics noisily, a random stranger picking you up off the floor, and then Tyler coming to save you. “Woah there,” Tyler steadied you. “You’re a mess.”

“Where’s Josh?” your incomprehensible attempt at speaking tumbled out of your mouth.

“Hmm?” Tyler cocked an eyebrow. “Oh, I think he went back. He couldn’t find you.”

“He left?” you slurred out.

“Yeah,” Tyler nodded. “To his hotel room. It’s getting late anyways. You should probably go back too. He’ll take care of you, I’ll leave you with him for the night. How about that?”

“I’d like that,” you responded happily.

“Goodness gracious, y/n, you’re reeking of alcohol,” Tyler frowned. “How much did you drink?”

“Just a little,” you replied.

“Uh huh…” he murmured. “Well how about we get you home?”

“Is Josh at home?” you sputtered out excitedly, your mind nothing but a jumbled mess of thoughts.

“He’s at the hotel, yeah,” Tyler answered. “But come on. We’ve got to get you in the car and then drive there too.” It took a while for him to drag you out to the driveway and help you into your seat, but eventually you were sitting shotgun, buckled in, and somewhat sane as Tyler drove down the road.

“Can I talk to Josh?” you wondered.

“Of course you can,” Tyler laughed. “We’ll see him in a little while.”

“No,” you whined impatiently. “Right now.”

“Right now?” he raised his eyebrows, gaze flickering from the road to you. “Uh, sure. You can call him if you want.”

“I can?” you asked eagerly.

“Sure you can,” he chuckled. “I mean, we’ll see him in just a couple minutes, but if you have to talk to him so bad, you can go right ahead.”

You fumbled for your phone in your pocket before pulling it out, somehow by miracle able to properly call Josh on the first try. The phone rang several times before he answered. “Hey y/n,” he greeted. “Sorry, I got kind of sleepy and I asked Tyler to take you home. How are you doing?”

“I’m so happy,” you sighed, slurring your words. “You should’ve been there.”

“Oh gosh,” Josh groaned. “Did you drink some more?”

“Just a little,” you insisted.

“A lot,” Tyler piped up.

“Don’t listen to him,” you argued. “I’m just a bit tipsy, that’s all.”

“You want to stay with me tonight?” Josh offered. “In case you get sick or something? I’m sure you won’t be so happy in a couple hours when all that junk starts to ruin your system.”

“That’s what I was thinking,” Tyler explained loud enough for Josh to hear. “If that’s alright with you.”

“It’s cool,” Josh replied. “You’ll be sticking with me tonight, y/n.”

“Sounds like a plan,” you grinned.

“Don’t get too excited,” Tyler rolled his eyes. “You’re probably going to have a killer hangover tomorrow morning.”

When you rolled into the parking lot of the hotel, Tyler could barely get you standing on your two feet. “I’m kind of dizzy,” you admitted. “Maybe that’s why my feet don’t work.”

“I’m dizzy just looking at you,” Tyler laughed. “Come on, let’s get you upstairs and to Josh’s room.”

“How do I walk if my feet don’t work?” you pouted.

“Your feet work just fine,” Tyler sighed. “You just need to try to use them.”

“I want Josh,” you insisted, swaying a couple times before Tyler stood you upright.

“I’m about to give up on you,” Tyler glared playfully. “Don’t make me call him down here to carry you.” “I’d like that,” you giggled cheerfully. “I’d like that a lot.”

“Y/n, you are so drunk,” Tyler rolled his eyes.

“I want to see Josh,” you complained as he tugged you towards the door of the hotel, shoving you towards the elevator. “I love Josh.”

“Oh, I’m sure you do,” Tyler smirked. “You don’t have to be drunk for me to figure that out.”

“I love him so much,” you repeated.

“Well you better behave yourself,” Tyler narrowed your eyes, helping you out of the elevator and supporting you as you ambled down the hallway to Josh’s hotel room. When Josh opened the door, he stared at you, widening his eyes.

“Oh geez,” he muttered. “I thought I told you not to drink anymore!”

“You got it from here?” Tyler asked, pained look on his face. “I’m dead tired. Y/n’s been quite the handful.”

“Hey!” you snapped. “I’ve been an angel!”

“Have you now?” Josh chuckled.

“I’m going to turn in for the night,” Tyler sighed. “You have fun with that one.”

“I’ll try,” Josh teased. He lugged you into the room and sat you on the couch. “Try to get some sleep, okay?”

“No!” you whined, tugging at his arm when he tried to walk away. “I want to stay with you.”

“You want me to stay out here for a little while until you fall asleep?” he wondered.

“I want to fall asleep with you,” you corrected. “Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”

“You’re cute when you’re drunk,” he rolled his eyes.

“You’re cute all the time,” you insisted.

“Sure,” Josh laughed. “Come on, how about you join me and we can go to my bed?”

“Bed?” you raised your eyebrows and grinned.

“Stop it,” he shook his head. “I mean so we can sleep.”

“You want to sleep with me?” you smiled slyly. “Joshua Dun.”

“You’re just being silly,” he argued. “Come on, we’re going to go sleep. In bed. Now.”

“Whatever you say,” you shrugged, goofy grin still plastered on your face as he just laughed and scooped you up in his arms, carrying you to the hotel bed and before tucking you in. “Bridal style.”

“That’s right,” he chuckled. “I don’t want you falling on your face, it’s best if I carry you.”

“You carry me like a bride,” you yawned happily. “Does that mean we’re going to get married?”

“Sure,” he joked. “If you want.”

“That would make me so happy,” you sighed, turning over to face him, scooching closer to him underneath the sheets. “You and me, together forever.”

“You’re so drunk,” he laughed. “I bet you won’t even remember any of this tomorrow morning.”

“Is that when our wedding is?” you tilted your head. “Tomorrow morning?”

“Sure, why not,” Josh decided.

“Can I ask you something?” you frowned. “It’s important.”

“Of course,” he smiled. “Anything you want.”

“Can you kiss me?” you inquired, hopeful eyes gazing up at his. “Please?”

“Uh…” Josh stared at you for a second, debating it. “I’d love to, really, but I think you’d rather have me kiss you when you’re sober. So you remember, you know?”

“So you want to?” your eyes lit up.

“Yeah,” he admitted. “I’d love to. But I’d also want you to remember.”

“Maybe I don’t need to remember,” you offered. “Maybe it can be our secret. Just tonight.”

“Just tonight?” Josh raised an eyebrow, still contemplating it in his head. You were being awfully tempting, and those lips looked so soft and sweet, but he knew it was wrong. He shouldn’t do anything you wouldn’t be comfortable with sober. Much less, he had just confessed that he wanted to kiss you! He was crazy! What if you remembered that tomorrow morning? What if it was just your drunk self-talking? Questions swirled around in his brain and doubt began to eat away at him, anxiety slowly seeping into his brain.

“Please,” you begged. “Come on, Josh. Just one kiss won’t hurt.”

“I guess it won’t,” he agreed shyly.

“Then come on,” you insisted, staring at him. You lowered your voice to barely a whisper. “Just kiss me.” He leaned in and rested a hand behind your head, pulling you close and kissing your lips gently, lingering a moment before pulling back, opening his eyes and staring at you.

“I love you,” he breathed, still lost in your eyes, trying to figure out what he had just done, much less, said.

“I love you too,” you grinned. “Come on, let’s not stop there.” You leaned in for another kiss but he shook his head, closing his eyes tight before opening them again.

“Not tonight,” he took a deep breath. “Maybe when you’re sober, but I um, I shouldn’t have done that y/n. You’re not thinking right.”

“I’m thinking perfectly fine!” you rolled your eyes. “Please Josh, I want more.”

“So do I,” he mumbled. “But I really don’t think we should do this now.”

“Josh,” you stated his name and reached forward to grab his shirt, snaking your hands down his chest and trying to tug it up. “We can’t stop there.”

“Yes,” he chuckled. “We can. We should.”

“I want this off,” you whined, tugging up his shirt again but he just laughed nervously, tugging the hem of his shirt back down to his waist.

“Let’s try to keep our clothes on, okay?” he raised his eyebrows. “I think it’s best you get some sleep, clear your head, and we’ll try this again some other time.”

“Not another time,” you complained. “Now.”

“I know, but we can’t,” he insisted. “It’s not right.”

“Didn’t it feel so good though?” you argued. “Your lips on mine? Being so close? Just the two of us, in this bed, together? Didn’t you feel something?”

“I did,” he nodded slowly. “However I think you just aren’t in the right circumstances to do any of that right now. You probably don’t even understand half of the things you’re saying. How about we cuddle and fall asleep, is that okay?”

“I want more than cuddles,” you persisted.

“Look, y/n, I’m sorry,” he sighed. “But please, I’m not going to argue with you anymore. Let’s just go to sleep. Please?”

“Okay,” you mumbled.

“Thank you,” he sighed. He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. “Goodnight sweetheart.”

A couple minutes passed before you fell asleep, eyes closed, wrapped in Josh’s arms. You both laid there in silence, a mixture of soft snores, quiet heartbeats, and shallow breathing. That was until the sun filtered through the blinds and there was a churning, horrible, miserable feeling in the pit of your stomach, and you stumbled out of bed, escaping his arms and staggering to the bathroom, flinging open the door and retching all the contents of your stomach into the toilet bowl. Vomiting wasn’t a pretty sight, especially during a horrific hangover, and you felt absolutely embarrassed you had caused the mess in Josh’s hotel bathroom. You heard him stirring in bed, calling your name, and your face instantly turned red. Your head was spinning, a terrible migraine overtaking you, and sure enough, you found yourself puking up even more. You felt Josh kneel beside you, rubbing small gentle circles on your back, brushing your hair out of your face. “I’m sorry,” you sputtered out. “Shit, I’m so sorry-”

“It’s okay,” he reassured. “Don’t apologize.”

“I feel miserable,” you mumbled and he frowned, handing you a towel to clean your mouth and flushing the toilet, helping you up and giving you a hug.

“I told you not to drink anymore last night,” he reminded.

“Did I?” you wondered, watching his eyes soften as he released the embrace.

“You don’t remember anything… do you?” he whispered.

“Why? Did uh, did something happen?” you looked around and started to realize how strange it was that you slept in Josh’s bed, he was cuddling you this morning, and you supposedly got absolutely wasted last night. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he shook his head. “Don’t worry about it, nothing happened. I just let you stay here for the night because I was afraid you might get sick. I’m glad I did, I mean, I wouldn’t want you all alone with a horrible hangover.”

“Thank you,” you stuttered out. “Goddammit I feel absolutely miserable.”

“I’ll get you a glass of water and some Advil,” he decided. “Just take it easy, okay? When you’re done you can just lay on the bed. Got it?”

“Yeah,” you nodded slowly. “Thanks so much.”

“No problem,” he gave a small smile. “I just really hope you feel better soon.”

You took a wet washcloth and wiped your face, taking a deep breath, then heading to the bed, rolling underneath the sheets. Josh approached you, handing you a cup of water and a couple Advil, which you downed and thanked him before resting your head on the pillow. “Can you, uh, stay with me? Maybe?” you asked shyly. “I don’t really want to be alone.”

“Sure,” he replied, pulling up the covers and lying beside you. Without thinking, he put an arm around you, pulling you closer, and you smiled. “Uh, is this okay? If I do this?”

“It’s more than okay,” you laughed. “I just wish I didn’t feel so shitty so I could enjoy it more. It’s not often I get cuddles.”

“You got plenty last night,” he chuckled.

“About that…” your voice trailed off. “What um, what did I do exactly? Last night?”

“You were fine,” Josh reassured. “I kept you under control. Tyler made sure you behaved.”

“Behaved?” you took a shaky breath.

“Yeah,” he smirked.

“W-what did I do?” you stammered.

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I mean, obviously you don’t really remember. And when you were drunk you promised it would be our little secret.”

“Josh-” a worried, embarrassed, scared look spread across your face.

“Don’t worry,” he insisted. “Much to your disliking, I made sure we kept all our clothes on.”

“What does that mean?” you grew quiet, twice as self-conscious now.

“You really want to know?” Josh raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I sort of do,” you admitted. “I mean, if I’m as rambunctious as you say I was.”

“Maybe I should tell you when you feel better,” he decided.

“I want to know,” you argued. “Now. Please?”

“You were getting sort of, um, suggestive last night,” he explained. “You wanted to do stuff, but I told you no cause you were absolutely wasted. You got all mopey and sad and kept persisting and we uh, we kissed, once. But then I made you go to bed.”

“We kissed?” your face turned bright red. “Oh gosh, I’m sorry, look I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s okay,” he laughed. “I’m fine. I just thought that um, you might want to know.”

“Yeah,” you nodded slowly. “So… was it a good kiss?”

“Maybe you would’ve remembered if you weren’t so drunk,” he rolled his eyes jokingly.

“No really,” you persisted. “Or was it awkward?”

“Maybe you should find out for yourself,” he suggested.

“What do you mean?” you narrowed your eyes.

“You know exactly what I mean,” he whispered. You stared at him for a second before capturing him in a kiss, pressing his lips on his and feeling him pull you closer, eyes closed, mouths opened, tongues moving in syncopation, his body so close to yours. When you pulled away you both opened your eyes, staring at each other, and you blinked twice.

“Did that really just happen?” you wondered, gasping for breath.

“Yeah,” Josh breathed, eyes staring into yours. “It did.”

“No, like last night,” you clarified, taking a deep breath and still unable to move your gaze away from his. “Did that happen?”

“Not as intimate, no,” he shook his head. “And uh, I don’t know about you, but I liked this one a lot better.”

“Me too,” you smiled. “Hopefully I’ll remember.”

“You think, uh, we should do it again?” he hinted. “Just in case?”

“Josh,” you laughed. “I don’t think I’ll be forgetting any of this anytime soon.”

“Do you still feel horrible?” he tilted his head to the side.

“I feel much better,” you replied. “But like you said, I think another kiss wouldn’t hurt.”

“You know you didn’t have to be drunk to kiss me, y/n,” Josh reminded. “I would’ve kissed you sober just fine. All you had to do is ask.”

“I was scared,” you admitted. “I mean, hell, what’s Tyler going to think?”

“I think he already knows,” Josh laughed. “You told him you were in love with me last night.”

“I did?” you widened your eyes. “What else happened that you never told me about?”

“You wanted my shirt off,” he added.

“I still do,” you teased.

“I’m pretty sure I can make that happen,” he gave a sly smile.

“Yeah?” you grinned.

“Yeah,” he murmured.

“I think I found the perfect cure to a killer hangover,” you chuckled.

“What? Kissing?” he raised his eyebrows.

“Nah,” you shook your head. “You.”

[kingofshadow2]

He surprises you once (josh dun x male reader) a continuation of hes a protector

IF YOU GUYS GET CONFUSED, THE ACTUAL FULL STORY IS ALSO BEING UPLOADED TO MY WATTPAD

"hey (Y/N)" josh said

"yes"

he looks at you with a puppy dog look.

"what are you about to do?" you say

"nothing, I just want to look at you."

you then say "babe, you look like a damn lost puppy, somethings up, tell me please"

he chuckles a bit, "nah, I'll let you guess"

"guess what?" you ask

"you're cute"

"I know" you say " but what are you getting at"

he leans forward, gently grabs the sides of your chin and kisses you oh so passionately.

you melt into the embrace.

after he let's go, you say "whyd you stop?"

"so I can start the car" he says

you get extremely confused "huh?"

"I'm taking you somewhere. " he says

oh god hes gonna kill me, you think

as you guys are driving, an interesting song comes over the playlist. it is a song called ''antique " by the ghost club.

josh kept glancing at you, noticing you were getting into the feel of the music.

"we are perfectly compatible" he said

"well duh" you reply

"I love how your soul is all the way into the music" he says

"well I guess that's why we match, mr. banger"

"huh" he blushes, his mind going elsewhere.

"the drums, naughty boy" you laugh

"oh yeah, ha" he laughs back

as you guys pull into where you were headed, you notice a long line of cars, and parking attendants.

"babe, what are we doing at the Coliseum " you ask, the curiousty striking

"just wait"

as you guys walk in, he has his.phone scanned for online tickets, but keeps it hidden for you.

you begin listening to other people around you, to at least get a clue.

you guys were lead into the a room, the private seating area where it was just you two.

"babe?"

"yes" you look at him "who are we seeing?"

"I know you have wanted to see (your favorite band), and they're playing here tonight so, surprise!"

the excitement overtakes.

(to be continued)

[cerebralthundering]

Bounce

Oof, I know it’s been forever since I wrote something. This one has been in my head for a while though & just haven’t been exactly sure how to go about it. I hope you like it though. And send me requests! I may start doing Brendon stuff too. Who knows.

Josh x fem reader: smut

Warnings: sex, duh. Bruising/scratching. Cursing.

——

It was just a chill Saturday afternoon at home where you were watching tv as your boyfriend, Josh, was in the basement practicing his drums. His band was off tour for a couple weeks between dates so you enjoyed having him a home. You were getting kinda bored watching tv after a while though & decided to go check on Josh.

You open the door to the sound-proof room to see him going hard at the drums. He was going so hard & was so focused he hadn’t yet noticed you walk in the room. You stood in the doorway just watching him intently. God, it always turned you on so much watching him play the drums - the way he put his all into it, watching his toned sweaty body, & imagining making that stool bounce in a different way. You bit down on your lip & tightened your legs.

“Hey babe!” he suddenly greets you as he finally noticed you in the doorway, knocking you out of that daydream. He put his drumsticks down beside him on the ground & took a swig of water. Shit, had he noticed the way you had been watching him? “What’s up?”

“Oh, nothing. I just wanted to come see how you were doing. I was getting kinda bored up there,” you tell him.

“Are you sure that’s the only reason?” he asks. You swallow hard.

“Uhh...w-what do you mean?”

“Well, you were standing there biting your lip & looking at me like you wanted to jump my bones,” he bluntly states. Shit, he did notice. You bit your lip & blushed while staring down at your feet. You had never told him how watching him play turned you on so much. You were worried he’d think it was weird or silly. You stumble over your thoughts before answering, trying to think of a good excuse, but nothing was coming to mind.

“Oh...umm...it’s nothing...” Your answer clearly didn’t satisfy him as he raised an eyebrow at you.

“Tell me,” he demands.

“Well...uhh...you gotta promise you won’t think it’s stupid, okay?” you plead.

“Babe, of course not. I promise.”

“Okay, well...err...watching you play the drums kinda...um...turns me on,” you mumble out while still looking down at the ground. You hear him take a heavy breath.

“Go on...” he requests while biting down on his own lip now. Damn, him biting his lip always drives you wild.

“The way you so passionately play them...& watching you get so hot & sweaty...& imaging, uh...”

“Say it, baby.”

You take a deep breath before quickly spewing out, “Imaging fucking you on that drum stool & bouncing up & down.” His eyes widened while inhaling sharply. Suddenly he stands up & starts walking towards you. You bite down harder on your lip while watching him intently. His eyes scan your body with lust & then his hands grab your hips & start pulling you back towards the stool. He sits back down on the stool as you’re still standing & he pulls your shirt off over your head. Once it’s on the floor he pulls you down onto his lap & grabs your face to kiss you. You place your hands on his chest while reciprocating his kiss & beginning to slowly grind down on his lap. The kiss quickly heats up & becomes more passionate, feeling him slide his tongue into your mouth. Your hands move up into his hair to gently grab the tufts of his short, dark hair.

After a moment he starts moving his hands to your back to unclasp your bra & then toss it to the floor. You gently inhale as you feel his hands moving back to the front to grab your breasts while still not breaking from the kiss. His thumbs start teasing your nipples as you gently moan into his mouth. You bite down on his bottom lip before you break the kiss to move your lips to his neck to begin to suck & nibble on it, making him softly moan as you continue grinding on him. You can feel his hard-on through his shorts as you press down harder. You feel one of his hands snake down your stomach between your bodies to make its way underneath the waistband of your pants as well as your panties.

“Mmm, you’re so wet, baby,” he breathily speaks out.

“All for you,” you reply as you feel him start to move his fingers between your folds, making you even more wet while moaning into his ear. Your hips still grinding down with his hand now between the two of you is making his fingers feel even better until he suddenly slips his hand back out.

“Stand up,” he insists. You do as you’re told & stand up in front of him. He grabs the waistband of both your pants & panties at the same down & quickly pulls them down before you step out of them. You immediately bend down to do the same to him, helping him wriggle out of his shorts & boxer briefs, causing his erection to spring out. You start licking your lips in excitement, knowing this fantasy of yours that you’ve had for a while is finally about to come true.

“Listen. I want you to get on my lap like you’re gonna ride me but wait a second so I can hold onto your waist when we bounce,” he explains. You nod in agreement & line up his hard cock with your entrance & slowly sit back down, causing both of you to gently moan out.

You wrap your arms around his back tightly, grabbing onto his shoulders as his hands grip tightly on your hips. “Ready?” he asks. You nod again.

He suddenly bounces once to test things out & you feel yourself slide up his cock & then back down while bouncing up & then again as you come down. This quick action makes you scream out from both pleasure & surprise.

“Holy shit!” he exclaims while staring at you to gauge your reaction.

“Fuck! Keep going!” you proclaim.

He starts bouncing again, speeding up slowly, causing you to feel like he’s fucking you at double the speed as normal, causing hard moans, screams, & expletives to fly from both of your mouths.

After he gets a rhythm going with the bouncing you start grinding your hips again, causing an even more explosion of pleasure. You can feel his fingers gripping so tight on your hips that it’ll probably leave bruises. Your fingers & nails are doing the same down his back.

You start to feel the warmth brewing in your abdomen warning you that you’re close. “J-Josh, I -“ your statement interrupted by another scream as you bounce, “I-I’m close!”

“Fuck, me too, baby.” After another breathy moan he growls out, “Make a mess on this stool.”

“Shit!” You continue yelping out as your movements get sloppy as your legs begin to tremble & weaken. Your nails dig into his back as the pleasure begins to erupt. “Fuck, Josh!” you scream out. You bury your screams into his shoulder, savoring this moment. Your walls tightening around his cock pushes him over the edge as well. “Oh god!”

You continue sloppily grinding your hips at a slower pace now as you both ride out your orgasms. He bounces one last time causing one last yelp out of you as you both finally come to a pause & losening your grips. Neither of you said anything for a minute as you both took the time to finally catch your breath, your forehead resting on his shoulder. The sweat is glistening on both bodies under the basement lights.

“Holy...shit...” he sighs. You look up at with a smirk on your face which makes him grin.

“Holy shit, indeed!” you laugh.

“Kinda sad though...” he confesses.

“Why?” you ask, puzzled, furrowing your brows.

“Sad that you didn’t tell me about this little fantasy of yours sooner,” he jokes. You roll your eyes & laugh. “That was the hottest fucking thing ever.”

“Yeah, damn, now I do wish I had told you sooner,” you blush.

“Well we’ll just have to make up to lost time then I guess...” he trails off, slyly smirking.

“Hell yeah, baby.”

You both stay in that position for a couple minutes longer until he breaks the silence. “So, are we gonna stay like this forever? Not that I would mind...”

You laugh before responding, “I, uh, don’t think I can move.” Your legs literally felt like Jello.

“Wrap your legs around me,” he requests. You did as told & wrap your legs as tightly as you could around his waist. He then stands up, his hands holding onto tight under your ass, & walking to the nearby couch before plopping you down. You shift a bit until you’re comfortable on the couch. He grabs the blanket hanging over the back & drapes it over you. He then walks back to grab his shorts & puts them back on.

“I still need to finish practicing this song,” he explains. “You can lay there as long as you need.”

“Okay, but you know what watching you before lead to,” you coyly state.

“Well shit, I’m never gonna finish then, am I?” he jokes.

“Nope!” you wink.

[saltynemo]

Cause and Effect

I’m alive bitches

(this was requested)

Sorry i’ve been ghosting, stressful life these days. Im 14, I have no sense of responsibility running a fanfic page.

 Tyler and Y/n get in a fight and he decides to end the marriage. The effect wasn't so great and led Y/n into a dark hole.

Warnings: Angst, Cussing, Fighting/Arguing (if you’re sensitive to this stuff like me, I advise you don’t read), 

Word Count: 976

S/N=Ship Name

     “You never spend time with me, Tyler! The only thing I see you do is sleep, leave the house, or watch TV!” I speak firmly, animating my hands in a chopping motion. I was upset. Upset that Tyler never talked to me as much as he used to. Upset that he always leaves the house. Upset I never see him. I was starting to believe he loved his career more than he loved me.

     “What are you talking about, Y/n? We always spend time together. Like the night before last. We watched a movie!” He replies, tossing his jacket on the couch, walking towards the kitchen.

     “You fell asleep in the middle of the movie. Plus, the only reason we watched it was because I complained to you about how you don’t spend time with me!” I shout, crossing my arms.

     “Y/n, I’ve been busy lately. This goddamn album is almost done and I just need to relax when I get home.”

     “Relax with me!” I cry. “Cuddle up next to me and tell me you love me while you snooze on my shoulder!” 

     “I need to sleep alone. I’m not always in the mood to cuddle, ya’ know?” He sighs.

     “Just because you have a mental illness doesn't mean you cant show me some love!” I shout, my words cutting the air. I instantly regretted it when it left my mouth.

     “Do not bring Blurryface into this!” He barks, pointing at me sharply. I sigh, rubbing the sides of my head.

     “I’m sorry.” I put my hands down. “I shouldn't have said that.”

     “Look, Y/n..” He exhales. “Our marriage isn't working out. You’re unhappy and I’m unhappy.” My heart drops, feeling as if it has stopped. It felt like the world and the universe just split. Is he really doing this to me? “I think we should split up...”

     It has been 24 hours since he broke up with me. He decided to sleep in the guest bedroom while I took the master bedroom. I tried to talk him into letting me sleep in the guest bedroom, but he made up his mind. I haven't thought of a way to tell the Clique about us, but I knew it would be horrible if they found out a different way.

     I posted on Instagram a picture of a black screen with the caption explaining the current situation. I basically said we were both unhappy and decided to end the marriage, concluding the statement with saying it was both our fault and I still care for him. Seconds I hit the Share button, my Instagram was full of shocked fans commenting and hearts. I wonder how this will turn out...

     The first couple of hours were comments of Stunned fans and devastated S/N accounts. For the next couple of days, death threats and harsh comments or DMs were the only things I saw. “You’ll pay for hurting Tyler” and “You deserve death” were the most common words I saw. It’s only been 3 days and I already fell into a depression. I’ve always been a happy person, but the disconnection between me and Tyler, including the Clique’s negativity, made me shiver from sobbing non-stop.

     All I felt was regret and sadness. Tyler found me an apartment and decided to rent me a room until I was in good enough health to get a job and pay for it by myself. I didn't think I would get into good shape anytime soon.

     I noticed I haven't eaten in days, my organs possibly failing from the lack of nutrition. I persuade myself to get up from my bed and go out. I slap on a hoodie and sweatpants, not caring for the hot and humid weather that awaited for me outside. I slip on socks, my vans following the process. Grabbing a 20 on my counter, I walk out the door, heading towards the Grocery Store.

     It barely took me 10 minutes to fill a bag with Ice Cream and head out the door. I was looking forward to binging and crying for the next couple of hours. As I make my way down the street, I hear gasps behind me. I glance over my shoulder, seeing a group of what seemed like young adults. One of them wore a Twenty One Pilots shirt, making me nearly jump. I walk faster, hoping they would get the idea that I wasn't in the mood to answer questions.

     “Hey!” One of them shouts, jogging up to me. “Y/n!” She shouts again, tapping my shoulder when she caught up to me. I turn around, faking a smile.

     “Hi.” I study her face, her stone cold expression making it obvious she wasn't happy with me.

     “Why did you break up with Tyler?” She asks, attitude dripping from her mouth. “Why would you break his heart like that.” 

     “You got this all wro-”

     “No, we understand the situation.” Another girl asks, the whole group caught up with me and plastered with scornful faces.

     “You broke up with Tyler and broke his heart. The ‘we still care about each other’ bullshit didn't fool us!” She barks, crossing her arms.

     “You’re a horrible person.” A third girl chimes in.

     “Now listen, believe what you want to believe, but me and Tyler are on good terms. I have no clue where-” I begin, the girl’s voices cutting me off. I was in no shape to argue what’s true and untrue with them. I may be older than them, but I felt powerless. 

     Filled to the brim with rage and fear, I walk away, the group hot in my tracks. They yell swears at me, telling me I cant face the truth. I continue to walk, blocking out the noise until I couldn't hear anything. It was all a blur. The first moment, I was walking away from them; the next moment, I was in a hospital bed, surrounded by nurses.

(bad ending, but It took me basically 35 minutes to write so :[)

[who-tf-stole-my-car-radio]

Lallapalopza part 5 will be posted today!

[callyourselfdun]

Breathe

“Breathe” you told yourself.

“Inhale, hold and exhale.”

“Just breathe.”

Pairings: Tyler Joseph x Reader Category: Sad? Warnings: Reader lets her frustration out by hitting Tyler lightly, he gives permission and it is stated that hitting your partner is not okay. Word Count: 2.1k

It had been hours, you were tossing and turning amongst the soft sheets of your bunk that had dreadfully began to constrict you, leaving you feeling suffocated and uncomfortable. There was a thin layer of sweat all over your skin causing the blanket to stick to you even more, so you kicked the thick material off your warm body for probably the third time tonight.

 Your boyfriend Tyler had a show tonight and decided to go out for drinks with Josh and the rest of the crew afterwards, you went to the show but kindly declined on the drinks as you weren’t a night owl like everybody else on tour.

 The boys put on an amazing show as per usual, creating a safe and happy environment for all of their dedicated fans; It was just as great as any other concert but with a little bit of individuality added in. Every single show was slightly different to make them unique and special to the audience. After the venue was all packed up Tyler, Josh and the crew decided on getting some celebratory drinks as the rest of the concerts were no longer in the United States. You decided that you were going to go with them to get pizza at the local restaurant but you would return to the tour bus when they went to the bar for drinks.

 You all had an early flight to catch so you were trying to get some sleep, thankful that you didn’t have any alcohol in your system to make this sleeplessness any worse then what it already was. Tyler understood your choice of not going out for too long, knowing that you had to be up early in the morning and that you had an unnecessarily hard time getting to sleep at night.

 “You shouldn’t have to try so hard! Why is this so hard for you to do? It’s a simple task!” you grumble to yourself angrily. You’d tried everything; you hadn’t had any caffeine, you weren’t napping during the day, you were exercising daily, you tried meditating, you’d been to therapy, you’d leave your phone on the kitchen table to prevent using it and most of all you tried your best to tune out the voices in your head.

 But tonight, nothing seemed to be working.

 Currently you were trying your breathing techniques that Tyler told you about after excessively searching the internet about your condition to try and help you after you told him, claiming that it was his job as a boyfriend even though you’ve been suffering with the condition for years now and had learnt to accept the difficulties.

 “Breathe” you told yourself.

 “Inhale, hold and exhale.”

 “Just breathe.”

 You feel hot tears beginning to pool in your eyes caused by the pure exhaustion and aggravation your body was experiencing. You sit up yet again, kicking your legs while scratching at your sensitive arms violently. You peer up at the clock and instantly feel the tears you were desperately trying so hard to hold back spill over your cheeks, it was officially 3:27am and you’d been trying to sleep since 10:19pm. You no longer felt in control of your emotions as everything that you felt was exaggerated, hurting more and more whilst salty tears continued to wet your cheeks. You close your eyes as you inhale the soft scents of lavender from your aromatherapy oils and decided that it’s now time to try taking your sleeping pills.

 You always tried to get to sleep using natural remedies before using the chemical substance that you hated so much, you walk into the small kitchenette, hearing nothing but your thoughts and sock covered feet lightly hitting the floor in the currently silent tour bus before reaching into the cabinet. You don’t bother to cover your mouth as you yawn tiredly; there was nobody in the dark bus anyway. Before you knew it you were swallowing the small white pills down with water, shivering at the bitter taste. You’d never been good at taking medication yet that seemed to be the only thing you had ever done consistently throughout your life.

 You make your way back over to your bunk, preparing yourself for another 20 or so minutes of frustration until your meds eventually kick in. You continue your breathing techniques, fighting with your thoughts before realizing that your brain was beginning to feel a bit fuzzy. You feel yourself smile in relief, excited that you’re finally going to experience sleep for the first time that night after over 5 hours. Your muscles begin to relax and sink into your mattress; you’re no longer sweating as you feel your thoughts calming down. As much as you despised this fuzzy feeling, your mind was the closest it had been to allowing you to sleep that night.

 You feel yourself drifting off, you’re breathing evenly and your horrible thoughts are at bay, you exhale one final time before-

 “Dude! That bartender was so sick! How did he not break a bottle whilst throwing them all around the place!” a recognisable voice laughs excitedly, followed by the bus door closing and footsteps.

 Josh.

 Your bottom lip wobbles and once again your eyes are filled with fresh tears. You’re angry as you hear Tyler laugh even louder, you were feeling an overwhelming amount of emotions and none seemed to be very positive but all seemed to be very intense. You needed to get a wall in-between yourself and them; the curtain of your bunk wasn’t proving to be enough to calm you down as Tyler shushes Josh politely.

 You get out of your bunk, your short purple pyjama shorts barely visible underneath Tyler’s oversized shirt on you. You begin walking to the bathroom while shaking out your arms out to try and relax your muscles, reminding yourself that you can lock the door in there, all you needed to do was get there.

 Breathe.

 Inhale, hold and exhale.

 Just breathe.

 You were about to enter the bathroom when you heard a loud sob rip through the atmosphere, shocked when you had realised it came from your own body. Your eyes track behind you as your head turns to see Tyler carefully walking towards you muttering something you couldn’t quite understand in your current state. You were fuming, continuing to walk towards the bathroom concerned about what you would’ve done to your loving boyfriend if you didn’t get yourself away from him.

 You slam the heavy door and quickly turn the lock before Tyler gets the opportunity to get himself in. Instantly you begin to let the loud heartbreaking sounds of your sobs rule over your small frame, shaking your bones from the pure force and aggression encased in them. You slide your breaking body down the door to sit on the cold tiles of the floor, pulling your knees to your chest and holding your spinning but chaotic head in your hands as you continue to drown in your familiarly frequent cries.

 “Baby, I’m so sorry. I really thought you were asleep; let me in so I can help you. I love you so much; please please please let me help you.” Tyler pleads from the other side of the door. Your heart was split in two, you desperately wanted to cling to his figure and let him help you back to a peaceful sleep, but you were also extremely worried that you would hurt him with the shear aggression that was raging through the blood in your veins at this moment.

 “I can’t” you choked. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

 “I don’t care love, you can hit me as much as you want as long as I get to help you.” He explains softly. You bite the flesh on the back of your hand as you fight back another sob, using your other hand to dig little red moon shaped creasants into the smooth skin of your thighs with your fingernails. Your cheeks never seemed to dry, constantly being dampened with fresh tears. You couldn’t decide if what your boyfriend was saying was helping, but you definitely were not calming down.

 “What’s going on?” You hear Josh ask Tyler quietly on the other side of the door. Another chocked sob rips through your body at that as you begin to feel guilty. Josh didn’t mean to wake you, Joshua was one of the nicest people you had ever met and he never deserved to be treated the way you were currently treating him. You could feel both his and your anxiety spike as you awaited Tyler’s response, you couldn’t imagine how awful you had probably made Josh feel and you wanted nothing more then to apologise, but for some reason your body just wouldn’t let you do it.

 “I’ll fill you in later, try and get some rest yeah?” Tyler proposes, desperately trying to get the attention off of you. You hear Josh agree with a small ‘Good night’ before tuning back into your own body. Deep and uneven gasps were escaping your lips as you continued to fight the urge of sobbing.

 The digging at your thighs had now progressed into scratching, leaving bright red lines all down your tan complexion. You bite into your lip hard enough causing it to split and bleed as your weak chest continues heaving, burning as your lungs try to receive a more steady flow of air.

 “Can I come in? You can hit me all you want, you can scream and cry but you’re not calming down by yourself and I want nothing more then to help you. Please Y/N, I need to help you.” Tyler’s voice cracking as he begs, it felt like you’d been locked in the bathroom for hours now, your aggression refusing to calm but your lungs still gasping for breath as your panicked state denied mercy on your wrecked body. You decide to talk to him, standing slowly whilst feeling your knees wobble from being in the same position for so long.

 When you open the door you’re met with Tyler’s shocked expression and bloodshot eyes, he sniffles quietly and it’s then that you realise he’s been crying too.

 You instantly close your fists and begin pounding his upper body with all the force you had left in you, continuing to thrash and yell at your boyfriend relentlessly, trying to get all of your pent up anger out but for some reason he just stands there and takes it all, doing nothing but whispering quiet ‘ssh’s’ and ‘you’re okay’s’.

 Eventually, he lightly grasps your soft fists effortlessly as exhaustion was preventing you from doing any major damage to him. He slowly pulls you into his chest wrapping his lean arms around your shaking frame. You accept the warmth and begin sobbing loudly once again, crying against his shirt while your lungs burn from your violent gasps for breath. “Shh, I got you baby girl. It’s okay, you’re okay, I’m okay and we’re okay.” He whispers, carding his thin fingers through your damp hair. You cling to the back of his shirt like it was the only thing keeping you alive, bundling the blue fabric in your fists and you dampen the material on his shoulder with your tears.

 The both of you just stand there, you sobbing and Tyler swaying you side to side, continuing to whisper sweet nothings in your ear. You finally begin to calm down as Tyler massages your scalp; your head was pounding from the terrorising and powerful noises that had been leaving your sweet lips all night. You eventually collapse against his chest so he picks you up, carrying you to his bunk.

 He wraps your trembling thighs around his waist while you hook your arms over his shoulder, lightly biting the collar of his shirt as he slides the two of you into the small but cosy space.

 Once he pulls the blanket over you, the only thing you do if wrap yourself around him tighter, thankful for his presence but deeply regretful of what you had done to him earlier. You begin to cry again “I’m so sorry” you mumble as you pull on his hair and lay impossibly closer to him. “I hit you and I-I hurt you, I’m so sorry, please forgive me, I’m s-so sorry you can hit me back I shouldn’t have-“ you ramble worriedly. What you did was wrong and your boyfriend didn’t deserve that.

 “I don’t care.” He states simply, pulling you in closer and laying his hand on your back rubbing small circles into your wet skin.

 “Breathe.” He whispers.

 “Inhale, hold and exhale.” He rocks you slightly.

 “Just breathe.” He kisses your forehead. The difference those words meant to you when leaving his lips.

 “Good night, sweet dreams and I love you.” is the last thing Tyler mumbles before you find yourself falling asleep, pressed against your lovers side.

[oldiesstationlover11607]

For you - Tyler Joseph x Reader

Relationship: Tyler Joseph x Reader

Warnings: angst and cliffhanger ending, tyler crying :(

Word Count: 1710

Summary: A few weeks after graduating high school you break the news to your best friend Tyler that you're leaving Columbus.

Summer 2006

Tyler and I had been friends since we were six, and nothing ever changed between us. It had been two weeks since we’d graduated high school, and we’d decided to go on a road trip. While most of our friends had already chosen which colleges they wanted to attend, neither Tyler nor I had made a final decision yet—except I’d just made mine that morning.

We’d parked our car at the entrance to a forest about an hour from Columbus and walked into the greenery. It was a warm day, so I was wearing a t-shirt I’d gotten on a Disney World trip with Tyler and my family, and he was wearing a black muscle shirt that showed off the tattoos he’d gotten the day we graduated, the ink still vibrant.

“I still can’t believe you got those,” I laughed, closing the car door.

“I still can’t believe my mom didn’t kill me the second she saw them,” he quipped, leading the way to the trail. “Have you thought much about what you’re going to do now that we’re done with school?”

I knew he was going to ask that question. I’d deliberately chosen not to tell him when I saw him that morning. When he realized I wasn’t answering, he turned around and looked at me, giving me a look that screamed, “I can read your mind.” His hair was short, initially buzzed to keep it out of his face for basketball, but it had grown out since. I looked into his eyes, which compelled me to tell him everything; the look on his face begged, “Please.”

“Come on, Ty. We don’t need to talk about that right now,” I muttered and continued to walk on until he grabbed my hand.

“Don’t hide things from me, Y/N. We don’t do that,” he said. I pulled my hand out of his grip and let out a loud sigh. He had a point. I’d never kept a secret from Tyler, and when I did have one, he was the first person I told. We were always vulnerable with each other, too. Whenever he was struggling, he’d come and talk to me. He’d even share his music with me despite feeling embarrassed about it because he was ‘supposed to be a jock.’

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

He laughed at that. “How on earth would you hurt me? It’s not like you’re leaving, right?” I didn’t say anything. I stood there staring at him with a saddened look on my face, which seemed to be contagious. “It’s not like you’re leaving, right?” he repeated.

“Tyler…” I reached out to him, but he moved away. My worst fear had come true. He hated me.

“You promised me… you said you’d always be here for me, Y/N. You know I need you!” His eyes quickly turned glossy with tears welling up. I had promised that. But I also knew that I couldn’t always be there for him.

“I only got into one school, Ty! What else am I supposed to do? You know I want to do film,” I sighed, running a hand through my hair.

“You’re supposed to stay in Columbus with me!” he shouted back, two tears running down his face.

“It’s gonna to be okay, Tyler,” I moved closer to him, and the tears started pouring down his face, prompting me to bring him into a tight embrace. He started sobbing, bringing the reality of how much I meant to him to the front of my mind. I really hadn’t thought we were that close. He pulled away slightly from me and looked desperately into my eyes, his hands coming up and cupping my face in the most intimate way he’d ever treated me.

“I need you, Y/N. Don’t leave me alone.” I leant my forehead against his, my right hand cupping the back of his head.

“I’m sorry, Ty,” I whispered, closing my eyes. This was the moment he decided to press his lips to mine in a quick kiss, the saltiness of his tears bringing a depression to an otherwise desperate attempt to make me his. His lips were softer than I had expected them to be. I’d known Tyler through both of his high school girlfriends, and he’d never treated any of them like this before. I pulled away from the kiss, my eyes searching for some kind of explanation.

“Stay with me. I love you,” he pleaded.

“You know I can’t,” I responded, “but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you too.”

We spent the rest of the day walking through the forest and talking about the future. I’d decided to move to California and attend UCLA’s Film School on an arts scholarship. He still didn’t know what to do now that school was over; basketball was his life in school, but he didn’t want to keep doing it forever. We’d ultimately decided to make the most of the summer and make memories while we could, which resulted in a summer romance between us—the very thing I least expected when I’d woken up that morning.

The day I left for California was hard on Tyler, but I’d made sure to prepare him.

“Are you sure you have to go?” he asked, sitting on my bed while I packed my bags.

“You already know the answer to that. But you know we’ll text every day,” I looked up at him. We’d agreed to end the relationship when I left; four years on the other side of the country would make a serious relationship between us impossible, and we didn’t want to break up on bad terms. “Hey, don’t you have that music thing next week?” Tyler had met some people over the summer who were in local bands and had started attending gigs on the weekends.

“Yeah, but I’ll be too depressed missing you to write anything at the damn workshop,” he’d now rolled over onto his back and was looking at me upside down off the edge of the bed. We both knew that every second we had would be our last, and it was bringing the feeling in the room down.

“I’m proud of you, Ty. You know that, right?” He rolled back onto his stomach and jumped up in front of me.

“Yeah, I know, babe,” he used the one nickname I’d earned over the summer. He was the only one to ever call me that, and I loved him for it.

“I mean it. You’re going places.” I smiled up at him before pulling him in for a final hug. He pressed a kiss to my right temple before whispering, “I’m gonna miss you so much.”

“I love you,” I whispered back before pulling away to grab my suitcase and getting into my car. “Text me every day, Ty, and never ever stop dreaming.”

Summer 2012

I hadn’t spoken to Tyler in three years. He stopped texting me as we both got busier with school and work. The last I’d heard from him, he had formed a band with two of his community college friends, but in a call from my mom, she had told me it wasn’t working out. Other than the occasional call with my mom, I had no idea what was going on back home. For the last few years, I’d worked in the film industry as both a writer and director for short films, but no big projects had come out of it. I was sitting in my apartment eating breakfast on my first Saturday off in a month, ironically scrolling through my emails. Everything was from producers, except for one email from an address I was unfamiliar with: “Reel Bear Media.” I laughed at the film pun before opening the email addressed to “Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Dear Y/N Y/L/N,

My name is Mark. You don’t know me, but I’ve heard a lot about you from one of my clients. I’m well aware that you’re currently based in Los Angeles, California, but I have a work opportunity I’d like to offer you. I currently work as a content producer for an Ohio band with a small but rapidly growing fan base. I’d like to offer you the job (at the request of the front man) as a touring videographer for the band ‘Twenty One Pilots.’ I’ve attached my contact information and some of my photos if you’re interested.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Mark Eshleman”

I scrolled down to look at the attached photo file to come face to face with the boy—now man—I hadn’t seen in around six years.

He’d finally done it. Tyler had finally had the opportunity to make his music. He’d met someone–who I was sure he got along well with–who could truly help him succeed. I pulled out my phone and dialled the saved number I had for Tyler, praying that he hadn’t changed his it. It rang once, twice, I looked at the clock to make sure the time zones were right, three times. 

“Hello?”

“Tyler?” I crossed my fingers, hoping it was him. 

“Hi Y/N. It’s been a long time hasn’t it?” the sound of his voice had changed, deeper than the last time I’d heard it. I could hear the sound of his smirk, confidence sounded good on him. 

“I got the email from Mark. I can’t believe you remembered I did film, let alone even thought of me,” I spoke, the tone of surprise very clearly sounding through the phone. I could hear his laugh come through the speaker. 

“Of course I thought of you. There’s very little I wouldn’t do for you baby,” I grinned hearing the nickname for the first time since I left, “I take it you’re coming then?” I nodded, knowing he can’t see me at all but knew exactly what I’m doing. “Flights are booked then. Be at LAX at 12pm and Josh and I will be at the airport in Columbus as soon as you land.” I couldn’t believe he had the power to book plane tickets that quickly and pick exactly who he wanted as part of his project. 

“I'm so excited to see you! I just know Josh is gonna love you,” he spoke.

“Sorry, who’s Josh?”

//

A/N: I really really loved writing this one. It went from something I wasn't too sure about into something super cute ngl. I'll probably write a part two if people want it so make sure to either request it in the question box or comment below if you're keen. Also, please don't repost my writing onto other platforms because I do work hard to come up with these stories!

Thanks for reading <3

[z0mbiekisses]

CALL ME, BEEP ME !

★⋆. ࿐࿔ ★⋆. ࿐࿔ ★⋆. ࿐࿔ ★⋆. ࿐࿔

a story where…

jasmine had her entire life planned. sure, maybe it wasn’t HER plans, HER dreams. but jasmine didn’t know anything different. she was on set for good day dema. jasmine was the stage manager, it was her job to make sure everything was perfect. to paint this image of what dema supposedly is. jasmine knew the city was far from pastels and upbeat music. however, this was her job. and she was determined to make sure she wouldn’t let the bishops down. but when jasmine saw tyler for the first time. something in her changed. but was jasmine really willing to sacrifice everything she has for some idea of “the outside” ? will tyler be enough to open her eyes to the truth?

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

playlist(wip); https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2yYKhpbeT1hFhl4PFDfYRa?si=Yuz4ah6MSRy21cjTiAvR3A&pi=u-xl9Jdur5ShCI

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

part one

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AUTHORS NOTE: hello!! this is my first time posting a fic on tumblr, despite me being no stranger to writing or tumblr lol. this is all in good fun!! i’m going to try my best to stick to the lore, however i might change things for story sake or get things wrong. if so im sorry!! this will also be pretty short, ill say this will be a 4 part series since this takes place so LATE in the lore. and i rather have a few lengthy parts than multiple short little “chapters”. this is also heavily inspired by @oldiesstationlover11607 work.. more specifically her 2 parter clancy series. PLEASE check out her work it’s some of my favorite!!!

ANYWAAYSSS!!!! i hope you guys enjoy this!! i look forward to writing!!

- val 🎀

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[beanfic]

The Creator Masterlist

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Graphic by @takenvysleep

[spookyjiimfanfiction]

Chapter Nine

Tear In My Heart | Series Masterlist

Warnings: Mention of Beau, extreme cuteness ahead

Word Count: 2719

Authors’ Note: We hope you enjoy this chapter! (picture credit)

December 2016 - Before Leg Three of the Emotional Roadshow

Parking your car in the driveway of Josh's home, you got out and instantly got hit by the freezing winds that had formed. December was always miserable in Ohio and you wanted nothing more than to curl up in front of a fire with a big blanket wrapped over you, but you had promised the boys and Jenna that you would be present tonight in order to help decorate the interior of Josh's house. He, thankfully, had done the exterior not too long ago and it looked beautiful. The bright lights shone down on your face as you hurried over to his front porch and knocked on the door.

Bouncing a little bit to stay warm and wrapping your arms around yourself, you waited only a few moments before the door was opened up to reveal a familiar smile in front of you.

"Hurry inside! You'll get sick!" Josh exclaimed and ushered you in, closing the door behind you, as you were greeted by Tyler and Jenna happily.

You smiled widely and waved, looking over to see how adorable the both of them looked in their matching ugly sweaters. It wasn't even Christmas yet, but they showed their spirit as often as they could that month. Suddenly, a pair of warm and strong arms wrapped around you from behind and they belonged to the one person that you wanted to be hugged by. You smiled and looked over your shoulder, realizing instantly how close he actually was to you and blushing almost instantly.

"Thank you for coming! We have the tree and it just needs to be decorated," he exclaimed, trying to brush off what he had just done as if it were no big deal. He let you go and then scurried over to said tree, reaching into a big box he had to pull out some ornaments. You slowly took off your coat to let it hang on the back of the nearest couch and saw Tyler and Jenna smirking in your direction, which caused you to roll your eyes. Making your way over in their direction, you stood beside Jenna and nudged her a bit before the both of you started giggling and helping to put some ornaments on the tree with little help from Tyler. He was too busy trying to get the Christmas music on to liven the mood more than it was. 

After a bit of time, Jenna gasped and caused everyone to look in her direction as if they were worried something was wrong with her. She quickly waved her hand to shoo away any worries.

"I forgot about the goodies! Y/N, come and help me!" she yelled and grabbed your arm, dragging you into the kitchen while you nearly tripped over things on the floor; causing Josh and Tyler to laugh.

After Jenna let go of your arm, she hurried over to the fridge and got out her necessary ingredients to start making the cookie dough mix. She looked over to you with a smile and pointed to the cabinets.

"Can you get me a few mixing bowls?"

"Of course!" you replied. It was obvious that she had brought everything over, because there was no way that Josh just had the correct things lying around his home.

Getting what she needed, you placed the bowls down on the counter beside her, receiving a thanks on her end.  The both of you got to work on the cookies, wanting to make them extra tasty for the boys, and got into a small conversation about the upcoming holidays. When you got to thinking, what you were doing... it was almost as if you and Josh were in a relationship already. You were baking for him - and Tyler a little -, spending time in his home, and helping him decorate.

Isn't that mostly what girlfriends do?

“What has you so happy?” Jenna asked upon noticing the smile on your face.

You glanced over to where the boys were standing near the tree, engrossed in their own activity. Tyler was standing on one arm of Josh’s couch, leaning over to put an ornament towards the top of the tree. Josh was beneath him with his arms out, just in case he fell. Tyler never fell though, you had learned that a long time ago.

“I’m just thinking,” you said, measuring out the ingredients that Jenna had put in front of you.

“About?”

“What life would be like if… you know. Him and I were to-”

“Say no more,” Jenna grinned as she added an egg to the cookie dough. “I understand you loud and clear.”

“Yeah,” you sighed.

“I take it things with Beau aren’t going well?”

You rolled your eyes, “Not at all. I’ve tried to end things at least five times since your wedding, but he just won’t listen. He always derails the conversation or pretends that he never heard me in the first place. I’m starting to think that I’m stuck in a relationship that I’ll never get out of.”

“You know, there’s always legal options… if it comes to that. The three of us are going to have your back.”

“I know, it’s just,” you sighed, “I don’t want to jeopardize the boys by bringing some giant legal matter onto their radar. Their career is really starting to pick up and I would hate to bring an end to that just because I can’t handle my stupid boyfriend.”

Jenna set down the spoon that she was stirring with and turned to face you, a serious expression now covering her face.

“Listen, I know that those two - idiotic as they may be - would much rather have you safe and happy, even if it meant a hit to their career. You’ve experienced firsthand what their fanbase is like, Y/N, they’re not going to ditch them anytime soon. And you and I both know that Josh would love to see you get rid of this guy.”

“He’s been wanting to see Beau gone since I met him four years ago.”

Four years ago. Had it really been that long since Josh came into your life?

“Just another reason to kick him to the curb.”

“I guess.”

Your conversation was interrupted by the boys wandering into the kitchen, carefully eyeing the bowl of cookie dough in front of Jenna. Josh hung around the far side of the counter, but Tyler was bold enough to come striding over and stick his finger straight into the bowl, earning him a swat from Jenna.

“You didn’t wash your hands!” she groaned. 

“My hands are spotless,” he said, making a show of licking the cookie dough off his finger.

Jenna only shook her head and went back to adding chocolate chips to the bowl. Tyler sauntered over behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his head on her shoulder. When she was distracted by him, he reached forward and swiped another glob of dough onto his fingers.

“Tyler!” she giggled. “Stop that!”

You couldn’t help but smile when Tyler pressed a kiss to her cheek. Over a year of marriage and they were still acting like the same lovesick children they were when they met. It gave you hope that one day, that might be you too.

Now that Jenna and Tyler were distracted by one another, Josh came wandering over and leaned against the counter next to you. He crossed his arms in front of him, making them even harder to ignore than usual.

“It seems like decorating the tree went well,” you smiled, meeting his eyes to avoid your own from wandering somewhere else.

“I would say so, aside from when Tyler nearly fell straight on top of me.”

“Hey, at least nothing ended up broken.”

“Yet.”

Josh laughed and shook his head. You stared for a moment, letting yourself take in the crinkles around his eyes and the few strands of pink hair that were framing his face. He noticed you staring and raised his eyebrows, making you turn away.

“Want to try some cookie dough?” you mumbled, already reaching for two spoons that were sitting out on the corner.

You scooped up two sizable globs of cookie dough with the spoons, handing one to Josh.

“Cheers?” he asked.

“Cheers.”

You clinked your spoons together and took a bite of cookie dough. It was easily the best recipe you had ever tried, thanks to Jenna. She wasn’t kidding when she said baking was one of her talents.

“This is amazing,” Josh nodded. “Great job, Y/N.”

“Yeah, I really helped,” you snorted.

Josh laughed and bumped you with his elbow. You simply ducked out of his way, stumbling a little in the process.

You giggled, “Guess I’ve had a little too much eggnog.”

“Ok! Ok. Boys out of the kitchen,” Jenna said. You turned to see that she had broken out of Tyler’s grasp and was now standing in front of the oven, waving her arms at all of you. “You interrupted our moment earlier.”

“Your moment?” Tyler asked.

“Yes. Our moment. Now get out of here so we can continue it.”

Tyler made a show of leaving the kitchen, making sure to drag his feet and sigh dramatically now and again. Josh followed behind him and gave him reassuring pats on the back, still holding his cookie dough in his free hand.

Leaning against the counter, you watched the boys leave - your sole focus being on Josh. Shaking your head to rattle yourself out of a small daydream you were having, you suddenly came to the realization that eyes were burning into you. Your head slowly turned to the side to face Jenna, who was staring in your direction with a giant smirk.

"Girl, you have it bad." She wiggled her eyebrows, causing you to laugh.

"Jenna, stop!" you responded with a light push to her arm.

The both of you turned back to your previous task of now placing the cookie dough onto the tinfoil covered trays and putting them inside the oven once it was preheated. Now that the both of you had a little time to spare, you would be able to get in that famous girl talk that the both of you were known for. Josh and Tyler knew full well that if they ever interrupted your girl talk time, there would be hell to pay... mostly from Jenna. She was sweet as pie, but she had her moments where she invoked wrath.

"So, are you going to tell me your true feelings now about the Little Drummer Boy in there?" That sentence alone made you roll your eyes harder than you ever had before, as the reference was ridiculous, but you couldn't help but smirk.

"I honestly wish I knew what they were. I mean... I know that I like him. A lot. But, there's just so much going on with Beau and he won't take a hint that I want to break up with him. I really want Josh to be happy and he deserves it, but am I really making him happy here? Stringing him along while I'm dating someone?" you spoke softly, so that the boys wouldn't be able to eavesdrop. Jenna just sighed and took your hands in her own.

"Y/N... what you have right now? It's not a relationship. You both are just existing in the same space. There's no love there. You have a guy in the next room over that would give you the world. He's waited this long for you. He's not going to leave now," Jenna spoke in a similar soft tone.

Tears started to sting at your eyes as they brimmed up, threatening to spill over and down your cheeks. Sniffling slightly, you squeezed her hands and nodded slowly to her, knowing full well that she had never been more right. You pulled one another in for a huge hug and stayed there for a few moments before pulling away as she checked your makeup for smears. Once you were both good, you giggled a bit together and linked arms, heading back into the living room to see the tree all finished. Josh was just putting the finishing touch on the tree: the star. You and Jenna sat on the couch to watch in awe, her sitting beside Tyler and leaving an open space beside you. The four of you gasped as the light of the star turned on after Josh had plugged it in and you all clapped happily at the sight. Josh came out from behind the tree with a goofy grin and bowed before he made his way over and sat beside you on the couch... a little closer than you thought he would. 

Swallowing hard, you could tell that something was different about his demeanor. Something was off. Was he nervous? Tyler and Jenna hadn't seemed to notice as they chatted with one another while looking on his cellphone at something funny. Josh’s leg bounced in its spot and his hand tapped on his upper thigh as if beating an imaginary drum, causing you to quirk an eyebrow in his direction.

"You okay there, Dun?" you asked softly, seemingly concerned for him.

"Y-Yeah... I, um, was hoping that we could talk, maybe?" He wouldn't look at you.

"Of course."

With that, Josh quickly got up and motioned for you to follow him, and you did so, heading around to the back part of the house in the hallway. He obviously wanted to get out of earshot of the grinning couple that had remained on the couch behind you. Now standing awkwardly with him, you could tell that he was having a hard time with whatever he was about to say and it made your heart start pounding in your chest. 

"So..." he started and you let out a breath of air to silently thank him for breaking the tension. "...Tyler and I have the Grammys coming up and we've been nominated for an award. I was wondering if maybe you'd want to come with me - us. Come with us." He stumbled through his words and it caused a big smile to play on your lips.

"I would love to, Josh." Finally, he looked up to you with a smile that matched the size of your own, suddenly seeming much more confident.

"Great! We'll talk more about it later and I'll give you the details," he said happily and you nodded to him, starting to walk with him back into the living room.

The both of you stopped dead in your tracks when you saw Jenna and Tyler standing there with smug looks on their faces. Josh seemed just as confused as you did. Before you were about to say something to question it, Tyler just pointed up above you to show a newly placed mistletoe decoration. You and Josh stared at it for a few moments, before both of your faces flushed bright red.

"You have to do it. It's tradition," Tyler grinned and nudged Jenna, who was giggling a bit. 

Josh looked over to you with a look of fear, not sure what he should actually do in this situation. You decided to take the initiative with what little courage you had and leaned forward, placing a soft kiss on his cheek, before hurrying to your spot on the couch. Josh stood there for a few moments, dazed, and had a very brief look of love that crossed his face. He tried to hide it, but the grin that was permanently on his lips betrayed him.

You were too nervous to meet his eyes when he took a seat next to you on the couch once again, instead opting to rope Jenna into a conversation so you had an excuse to keep your attention elsewhere. Even as the two of you sat discussing the latest episode of your favorite TV show, your mind wouldn’t stop its endless loop of the kiss you had just given Josh. It had been brief, but the feeling of his cheek against your lips was enough to have your hands shaking. Thankfully, your oversized sweater - and Jenna eventually dragging you back to the kitchen - proved to be enough to hide it.

You just hoped that Josh was willing to wait a little longer.

*     *     *     *     *

Taglist

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