#Like this shit was 2-3 months ago lmao I'm so late

[srenorsomethin9]

[TW: BLOOD]

"Look this way & give me a smile"

[sugarteeferz]

🧪 beverlyyy-catsss reblogged dogfather5 5min ago

🐶 dogfather5

still my favorite picture of them

🧪 beverlyyy-catsss Mutuals

u only post about ur dogs did u know that :3

🐶 dogfather5

username beverlyyy-CATSSS accuses DOGFATHER5 of posting too much about his dogs

i guess i shall stop

🧪 beverlyyy-catsss Mutuals

nah u should keep doing it, only reason to open this website at all

(512 notes)

🐶 dogfather5 reblogged jack56596898 5min ago

👩🏻‍🦰 tattlecrimer1 ✅ Follow

just posted a new article to the website 😁😁😁

GAY OR EUROPEAN? The answer is so much worse

In this article we dig into the history of renowned psychiatrist Hannibal Lecter after recent cannibalism accusations...

TATTLECRIME.NET

👨🏿 jack56596898 ✅

Please get a real job.

#its the middle of pride month and she's posting THIS???

(1,963 notes)

🐶 dogfather5 reblogged frederick-baltimore 20min ago

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

I think cannibalism should be legalized. I've never understood why it's a crime. There's nothing immoral about it.

👩🏻‍🦰 tattlecrimer1 ✅ Follow

WHAT the ACTUAL FUCK is WRONG WITH YOU??????????

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

I'm fairly certain a tabloid journalist like you would find it rather easy to tell I don't actually think this.

📚 frederick-baltimore Follow

aand there we have it everybody: schrodinger's asshole.

🌸 blooming-light Mutuals

I think he was making a weird joke...

📚 frederick-baltimore Follow

pretty sure jokes are supposed to be funny.

🐶 dogfather5

but it was kinda funny

(4,256 notes)

🤓 the-man-mason reblogged 40min ago

🤓 the-man-mason ✅✅✅✅✅✅ Follow

psychiatrist currently handing me some weird ass drugs rn. LMAO. telling me to be careful. as if im a lightweight beta ffs?! these edibles aint shit

🤓 the-man-mason ✅✅✅✅✅✅ Follow

hopital

(3,245 notes)

🐶 dogfather5 reblogged cain-and-abel 45min ago

🦌 cain-and-abel Follow

this weird anonymous person has been stalking me for the past few months ever since i started posting abt being the ripper 🤣🤣🤣 bitches really be so fucking jealous

🦌 cain-and-abel Follow

#i have thoughts about this but thinking now i should probably stay quiet

@/dogfather5 wdym?? spill it out. or are you a pussy 🤣

🐶 dogfather5

no i'm deadass scared i might die

(23 notes)

🦌 cain-and-abel Follow 55min ago

😎 anonymous asked:

Did you actually copy my whole layout just now? Be serious.

hi """ripper"""

wtf i have no clue what ur talking about 🤣

it's just an aesthetic as kids these days call it. why so dense? 🤣

(49 notes)

📚 frederick-baltimore reblogged 2h ago

📚 frederick-baltimore Follow

isn't it kinda weird that his name rhymes with cannibal

📚 frederick-baltimore Follow

why is everyone collectively insulting me in the notes??? when i turn out to be right you all are gonna come to me with apologies 🙄🙄🙄

(891 notes)

🌸 blooming-light reblogged grahamprivate 3h ago

🐩 grahamprivate

been thinking some things lately

🌸 blooming-light Mutuals

This could mean so many different things I'm frankly scared to ask

🐩 grahamprivate

have u ever wondered if you weren't straight

🌸 blooming-light Mutuals

Oh

(3 notes)

🐩 grahamprivate reblogged beverlyyy-catsss 3h ago

🐩 grahamprivate

................

🧪 beverlyyy-catsss Mutuals

hey dont be sad we'll all support you. i mean we already knew but still

🐩 grahamprivate

you WHAT

(2 notes)

🦌 countlecterviii reblogged dogfather5 3h ago

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

Happy Pride Month. Remember to stay safe and love each other.

👩🏻‍🦰 tattlecrimer1 ✅ Follow

when are you gonna address the murder allegations freak

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

I find it deeply concerning that you've been harrassing me particularly more often since June started, especially as a queer man myself. It's not giving the greatest of impressions.

📚 frederick-baltimore Follow

who cares if you like sucking dick we're all fairly certain you feed human meat to your guests

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

Extremely disappointing to see you also partake in such behavior. I won't reply anymore.

🐶 dogfather5

youre gay???? or are you like half gay whatever thats called

🦌 countlecterviii ✅✅✅ Mutuals

Non-discriminating. ;)

(3,025 notes)

💋 divine-margot reblogged 5h ago

💋 divine-margot

i love kissing women

👤 mason57489265

eww

💋 divine-margot

how many times do i need to block you before you stop annoying tf out of me was the attempted murder not enough to shut you up

💋 divine-margot

wait is this your way of coming out which one is it

(17,248 notes)

🐱 bibigail29 12h ago

i miss my mom

(0 notes)

hannibal tumblr but its will's for you page

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

medialog april 2k24

ok. sick day catch up part two

watched

monkey man - this was gnarly and fun and dev patel, quite simply the hottest man ever to live, is upsettingly hot in this film, like SO hot oh my fucking god

white room - this was a VERY weird movie that (as per the filmmaker q & a) totally flopped at a film festival and never received distribution... you can kinda see why but i more or less liked it. it's about a weird sheltered repressed dude who accidentally sees the murder of a mysterious pop star and then accidentally befriends and falls in love with the woman who was actually the reclusive songwriter and voice of the act... the filmmaker described it as a "journey through genres" and it was very artistically ambitious in a way that maybe didn't totally work but it had some really good stuff about art/consumption/fame/women (my jam) and it frequently looked gorgeous and also all of the mysterious/reclusive pop singer's songs were big late 80s/early 90s style upbeat synth-bombast numbers with lyrics taken from emily dickinson poems which is soooooo funny and a great idea

alien - this is like die hard in that if i'd seen it ten years ago i would not really have understood the hype but seeing after i had a backwards education in film by watching all of the mcu movies and developing curiosity about the question of why they were bad and ugly in such distinct ways and from there developing a nascent and unsophisticated appreciation of the filmic qualities of film i'm like, wow what an incredibly fucking well made movie!!!!!! some things in particular i liked were (1) no substantive backstory for anyone, no dark secrets except the one that really counted, no traumatic pasts, no explanation for how this world works or why anyone was here except needing a job, just giving us the bare minimum to understand the situation the characters find themselves in and trusting the story to do the rest (2) very good spaceshippy spaceship (another way it's like die hard is lots of great Texture, another thing that the MCU lacks which like many other MCU traits was actually a totally fitting design choice for tech bro billionaire tony stark in iron man but simply did not need to expand to Everything...) (3) sigourney weaver so good! ian holmes also very good (4) lots of suspense through silence which is one of the most lost of lost arts in the realm of big expensive Cool Shit Happens cinema!

roy cohn/jack smith - this was a filmed recording of two monologues performed by ron vawter, a gay actor who died of AIDS, each in the character of another gay man who had AIDS - the notorious roy cohn & the experimental cinema icon jack smith. i don't really have much to say about it but i feel very lucky to have seen it and vawter was incredible - i'm glad also that he happened to come to our attention a few months ago because he played the therapist in sex lies & videotape.

mad max: fury road - ok i kept putting this off because the way people talked about it on the internet frankly emphasized to an off-putting degree the ideas in this movie and did not adequately convey to me personally the most important thing about it which is that it Fucking Owns Lmao Wow. we happened to pause it for some reason like 50 minutes in and i swear to you i would have guessed 15, maybe 20 minutes had passed, that's how much it flies by... the coolest shit ever, i wanted to live there forever! also lottie yellowjackets is one of the wives????

mission: impossible 3 - the worst movie in the entire world. we only revisited this one as part of our ongoing marathon with some friends and we spent the whole time complaining about jj abrams' totally inept camera work... seriously watch this movie and look out for (1) every time an already fast sequence is torn up with a zillion stupid little cuts some of which actively prevent us from seeing something that could have been cool (2) every time we get to a new location and the camera starts aimlessly drifting to the side literally immediately because he's afraid we'll get bored if we sit in a location for one whole second (3) every time 3 people are having a conversation and the camera spends the whole time just purposelessly wafting back and forth side to side for, i cannot emphasize this enough, no reason at all. literally nothing in this, an installment of the Stuff Looking Cool franchise, looks even a little bit cool even one time. people hate on 2 for the male gaze of it all re: thandie newton but her character has more personality and agency than ethan's sexy lamp wife in this. the closest to a redeeming value this movie has is that it really feels like part of the goal was to remind everyone of how even though tom cruise jumped on that couch one time he's actually a very normal american heterosexual man (he passes out at one point and flashes back to his wife in her underwear sdksoeroser it's SO dumb) but because he's tom cruise (a total insane freak) he can't convincingly portray that at all and just comes across as insane and maybe a sociopath. "what about philip seymour hoffman" i'm not going to give abrams credit for knowing PSH was a good actor, that's like saying defending a doctor accused of malpractice by saying he knows that feet generally have toes. be serious. i will give a shout out to simon pegg, who is in this less than i remembered but who comes across as the MVP (across what should be a deep bench of a cast!) of making abrams' horrible comic-book-bro-patter come across as something a human might say, mostly so i can also share my friend's insight when i said that which is that it makes sense pegg is suited to the task given that he cut his teeth largely on movies that are parodies of shitty action movies.

mission: impossible - ghost protocol - a wonderful and perfect treat :) i've gone on at length about this one before and really have nothing left to say but it's so good and so specifically good at all the things 3 sucks ass at... my friend was physically squirming next to me on the couch during the burj khalifa sequence, as is right and proper :)

read

beautiful losers - this is a novel leonard cohen wrote in the 60s that is very weird and experimental and i'll be real with you and say i did not get it. it's about a guy whose wife and best friend he had a weird sexual relationship with are both dead and now he's kind of obsessed with an iroquois saint... i am not sure how to describe it but i guess i would say if you think the music of leonard cohen is too optimistic and insufficiently horny for you maybe you would like this. it is probably the most aggressively sexual book i've ever read but not in an erotic way... it's very like about the nastiness of sex and bodies... which i admire ideologically on a certain level but it's really quite unrelenting with it... occasionally there are snatches of deeply beautiful writing though.

listened

sourpatch, stagger & fade - nick put on the vinyl of this and i was like oh that sounds nice and i wound up listening to it a bit... fuzzy indie rock (i'm not educated enough to parse genres more finely than that) that makes for very pleasant background listening

ariana grande, eternal sunshine - i've never kept up with ariana because i just find her voice kind of annoying and i had never heard a song to challenge that UNTIL we reviewed "we can't be friends" at singles jukebox and ariana teaming up with max martin to do kidz bop body talk era robyn turned out to be everything i wanted from her... unfortunately the rest of the album was incredibly boring lol. love that song tho!

maggie rogers, don't forget me - i don't know that i find this one as interesting as her last album or quite as likable as her first (although that might be me somewhat overrating her first because i love "light on" sooooo much) but she's such a capital-M Musician she's always a pleasure to listen to. "drunk" was an early fave but recently i found myself returning a lot to "the kill"

girl in red, i'm doing it again baby! - girl in red comes a lot when other people are talking about the g*yl*rs as one of the actual queer artists they should support but first of all they actually love her and second of all i listened to this album twice straight through and have let some of the songs play on shuffle since and i could not hum you one single line :/

taylor swift, the tortured poets department - speak of the devil! i mean i've talked about this. i like this album a lot - at this point i'm ready to call it easily her best work except for maybe folklore, and honestly i find it hard to assess folklore out of what a special lockdown treat it felt like at the time. i don't expect a world insistent on calling 1989 pop perfection to eventually agree with me but i think people will mellow out about it in time and forget that it was so divisive on release much as has happened with reputation (an album far worthier of scorn if not without its occasional merits) and at the VERY least i think in like 5 years it will be more or less consensus that it's better than midnights.

the starting line, say it like you mean it - i listened to this album mostly to fact-check claims i was making about emo in the taylor swift piece but then i kept listening to it cuz it was kinda full of bops!

fall out boy, take this to your grave - @voidofcourse recommended this as a stepping stone from the starting line for loud guys offering bops and indeed it too was full of bops!

other

an enemy of the people - i saw this on broadway, yes, 1000% literally just because my boy my king my number one guy jeremy strong was in it. the production was interesting and good if not flawless, and although i think some of the younger cast members got a little lost in the old-fashioned theatrical language (even in a new translation) and could have used some direction towards really pulling out the meaning of individual sentences they were saying, the more seasoned actors all did a great job, including, of course, jeremy strong, who got to be shoved into a pit and have pretend ice thrown at him, i'm so happy for him. also the play was incredible? like as a play? i said as much here after seeing it but basically it's about this doctor who discovers that the town baths that are about to open have a contaminated water supply that is definitely going to result in people getting sick and some of them dying, especially since they are being advertised partly for their health-restoring properties for people who are already not doing well, and he's like, wow, good thing i caught this thanks to the help of science so we can change plans, and then everyone else in town is like, but have you considered that would be expensive? why do you hate poor people? (there's a thread specifically about the editor of the radical leftist newspaper going from being the doctor's number one champion to being totally coopted out of both politics and self-interest that was particularly brutal to watch...) like it was truly SO incredibly specifically relevant to some Extremely Contemporary Issues that i was just agog and also it was incredibly fucking upsetting to watch! really really great playwriting, such a clean example of how a work can best encompass & comment on ideas by developing them through character and dramatic action rooted in wants, needs, choices, conflict, etc., a lesson many people could stand to learn. i kept thinking it had burrowed as deeply into the core issues as it could and then it found another layer. this ibsen guy... he really knew some stuff about stuff....

[sipsteainanxiety]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

i was tagged by @coopigeoncoo @andypantsx3 @willowser and @namodawrites to do this lil self fic rec game and after finally sitting down to think about it for a very... long... time... i have done it! thank you all for the tag i kiss you each on the forehead and give you a bowl of sliced fruit<3

after looking at all the wips i have in docs right now, i can definitely say that this list would be completely different if i had finished a few of them, but for now this is my ranked list for things i've published already lol

devil's glare — demon!bkg x reader

bakugou katsuki is a powerful demon that you have the pleasure of dating. but when he pisses you off one day, you decide to get back at him in a pretty petty way: drawing a salt circle around you to force him to apologize 

i had THEE most fun writing this one shot LMAO. it was based on a tiktok of all things that i'd found back when i was still on the app pfft. i just loved the idea of bkg being all surly and aggravated that his little human had purposely drawn a salt circle to prevent him from encroaching on their space. and like... him dealing with wanting to idk kiss you so bad but you're trying to teach him a lesson and he's sooooo mad and fuck, he's gonna do whatever he can to get you to comply to him lmao. if i could draw, there's this one scene where you're wearing this like. cute little set of pjs staring up at this big ass demon, wings unfurled threateningly, snarl on his face, arms crossed with a line of salt in between the two of you. like i have a vision. too bad i can't draw it LMFAOO. maybe one day

2. holding out (just for you) — dragon!bkg x reader

in which you find a horrendously injured dragon in a cave and make it your duty to heal him, not knowing that he’s the infamous dragonshifter, bakugo katsuki, who has been cursed to remain trapped in his dragon form forever—unless the spell is broken

this fic... oh boy. i've been working on this fic since mmm 2021 i think? i can't believe it's been a year since the big bang LMFAOO. i also can't blv this shit evolved from being a standalone to having 3 spinoffs and a sequel but well. here we are. complaints aside i really do have fun writing this fic!! i dunno!! i dont think i'd ever read a dragon bkg fic before and i was like fine i'll do it myself and this happened. i added way too much plot and you guys don't even know about half the worldbuilding and shit i have planned for the sequel HAHA. i can't even talk about it bc it would be major spoilers rn rhrsfjhrjfrjrhjg. it's also been giving me such a rough time lately pfft, especially with having to make sure everything lines up for the spinoffs n stuff. im so afraid of publishing ch4 and having to go back and tweak things bc i havent planned out far enough sdkjfsjkdf. i think it just means i'm gonna have to go on a hiatus or smthn and write out all the spinoffs + ch4 at once idk

3. and i give my all (to you) — merman!bkg x reader

you think you bit off more than you could chew when you decided to do your dissertation on ocean acidification, leaving you stranded out in the open ocean. alone. for months. well… maybe you weren’t so alone after all

this is another fic that i've been working on way longer than it's been posted for pfft. i can't blv the first chapter was released over a year ago LMAOOO i am so sorry. i do like this fic tho bc it's one of the easier ones to write and i go back to it sometimes between writing for dragon bkg lol. like i have the chapters all mapped out, all i have to do is sit down and write em. ch2's at abt 3k rn tho and i hit a spot where i'm like oof i dont wanna write these descriptions dfhdkfg it's just a silly goofy story with merbaku and dealing with some of the subtle intricacies of getting to know a mermaid. actually, fun fact, this originally started off as a fic for jotaro from jjba, back when i was in my jjba era. but then i went back to my bkg era and switched it over. i didn't even have to change much LMFAOO jotaro and bkg act the same sometimes. also!! this is the first fic where i'm like... drawing little doodles for each chapter!! and it's so nice but also i'm like damn wtf do i draw for the rest of these chapters.... i'll figure it out ig

4. loving all the parts of you — pro hero!bkg x reader

in which you learn to love all the prickly parts that make up bakugou katsuki

i.. don't think i've thought about this fic for a very, very long time. but i just scrolled thru the masterlist and stuff and i... really liked writing it (when i was focused on it anyways). it's one of my gentler fics tbh. it's more of a character study of bkg, exploring a different aspect of him in each chapter. tbh i need to go through and reread it and make edits so it can better match the writing style i have now, but i rly liked thinking abt what would make bkg tick as a pro and as a person. and tbh, with what i know now of the manga and anime i think i could go very deep with it pfft. also the banner i made for this fic is so cute LOL. it's not high on my priority list rn bc i have other things i wanna work on, but i do hope to return to it one day.

5. forget me not — pro hero!bkg x reader

When you first woke up, you found yourself in a white room, lights blinding you from all directions. A bit disoriented, you squinted and looked around, realizing you were chained to a chair, your arms locked behind you. In front of you was a poster of a man, muscles rippling throughout his body, a spiky mess of ash blond hair nestled on his head, and striking crimson eyes glaring right at you from behind a black mask. In the upper right corner was the name “DYNAMIGHT” in black and orange letters. As you observed the poster, the sound of a P.A. system suddenly rang into existence, the deep, hoarse voice of an unknown person echoing around you. “Your name is [Name] [Surname],” the voice said without emotion, “and you hate the man named Bakugou Katsuki.”

THIS FIC... THIS FCKIN FIC. i have so much i can say about this fic and i am so sorry for the oncoming ramble pfft. firstly, it's both my baby and my number one fucking enemy. like, holy shit i think it gave me the most paralyzing anxiety and bc of this it took me like 3-4 years to finish (apart from being generally busy of course). i started it literally while i was in high school n applying to college, so of course there are aspects of it that i look at now and i'm like mmm don't like that. not to mention there have been so many things that happened in the anime/manga that i wasn't able to add or delve deeper into!! like the war!! bkg's fcking trauma!! midoriya's quirks!! i was an anime only when i first started releasing chapters (and i still am), so i didnt know about the endeavor agency arc or anything so i defaulted to shit with best jeanist and idkidk.

if i could rewrite all of fmn, i think i would. or maybe not all, but a good chunk of it. like i'd condense the first few chapters probably. i also have a different grasp of bkg's characterization now compared to when i was younger lmao. putting bkg in that specific circumstance (iykyk, i wont spoil it) only happened bc of certain outside factors that forced him into that position. which was how i was able to justify it. but... idk. IDK!! this fic had so many things to it that i was not knowledgeable about so i winged a lot of things without doing proper research (i.e. hospitals, police investigations, general bureaucracy and whatnot) and i feel like this has caused certain plot holes that i am not able to detect, but like.... it's been so long already that i'm too lazy to fix it.

i just really wanted to write about having amnesia but... still having this muscle memory and ache of the person you were in love with. that you can fall in love with them all over again. but, jeez, i put the reader through so much that there's so much... trauma and brainwashing and just rhhrhjrkhrhgrkjg. she's a mess and a half!! and this makes it so difficult to read fmn bc she's so frustrating!! but! at the same time idk it was interesting exploring that kind of ptsd and recovery. i think at my core i love writing about truly heartwrenching topics and horror. i rmb i had the most fun writing about reader's nightmares or that one chapter where she was messing around with illusions. actually- one of the things i would change is the reader's fckin quirk and hero name LMAOOOOO what the fuck i made her so op i basically just smashed together dr strange's and wanda's powers for her pfft. i'd also tweak her personality a little, i think.

i digress. anyways. im in the process of editing all of fmn (just like. writing tweaks. changing the phrasing of certain sentences. adding more fluff to descriptions) and i can really see how much my style has evolved lol. like, i am the most happy and proud of the later chapters, where you can really feel certain emotions with bkg and reader. like... the beach scene, or the stakeout scene, or the party scene!! i think i would also add more substance to the investigation and how being a hero is like post-war. the antagonists as well!! there's just so much that could've been built on, but at the same time... i didn't want to go too deep into it bc i was writing an amnesia recovery story.

flaming aside, i am very glad i was able to pull those plot twists successfully LOL. i loved reading people's theories back when i was still updating it, seeing them question things and being like wait a minute... no way... it can't be... it was an era i will never forget pfft. but... because of that expectation i think i was very nervous to reveal specific things or even write the ending bc i didn't know if people would be satisfied lol. fmn was so complicated and for what sdfkjhs. fanfic shouldnt make you this anxious fr and yet there i was. i'm glad im done with it, but at the same time.. i do miss it.

tldr: fmn is the fic that i am the most proud of but also the most insecure LMFAOO. i do eventually want to get to the extra chapters from bkg's pov for it but... idk. i don't wanna even look at it right now sdhfskdfjsf

thank u all for coming to my ted talk B) i'm sorry if u've been tagged alr in this but here we go anyways!! no pressure tags: @earthtooz @call-me-ko @thecatduet422 @boo-kugo @theloveinc <3

[summerlycoris]

Okay so I'm putting this here because Dad really fucking pissed me off today and If I don't write something I'll just-

So I was helping him to put in a veranda and ramp on the front of my house today. Work projects with Dad would be difficult, but not misery, if he could just. Fucking. Not be a dick for 5 seconds.

Unfortunately my dad has "must be a dick every 5 seconds " disease so that's never fucking happening lmao lol roflmao.

Anyway. He was ragging out my brothers girlfriend Rochelle. And yeah. She's got problems. Neither of us can see the relationship lasting. (Rochelle's nice, but not to brodie. She let's her anxiety get the best of her, and constantly embarrasses him in front of their friends making out of line jokes, and emotionally abusing him.)

Dad thinks the reason they're not going to last is that Rochelle is on disability and is "a leech" "She's going nowhere." He used himself (hes not fucking diagnosed. And normally im all for self diagnosis. But not for this cuntwad. I WILL gatekeep from my damn dad because fuck him thats why.) me and my brother as examples of disabled people who don't need help.

And that ticked me off. Because I do need help. I just don't get help. Brodie needs help too. He just can't get it. Hell, maybe if dad had help as a kid he wouldn't have been such a bastard when we were kids. (He's fucked up 2/3 kids. Bad odds when your a parent. And he's still got plenty of time to fuck up the 3rd kid! SHES ONLY 4 YEARS OLD.)

I can't remember exactly, but I try to tell him that my life wasn't great and that I could've used some help. He asks how my life sucked so bad.

And I'm just fucking gobsmacked. Mum did this too recently- despite literally being the one to say that she thought I was gonna off myself at 11 years old years ago. Do these two not have any fucking memories?

I told him I'd been bullied all through school. (Couldn't exactly tell him he'd treated me like dirt whenever he was home) and he was like "well you're living a better life than your bullies. I bet they don't own a house."

I got so fucking angry. And I couldn't explain it at the time. But I can now- it doesn't matter what YOU think. Or what Mum thinks. Or what the fucking goldfish think. You don't live my life! And my opinions the one that matters, because im the one living that life. And I think my life's kinda shit!

I can't make friends. Not because I'm necessarily bad at talking to people (I can mask better now than I ever could as a kid) but because I just can't feel the same way about talking to people as I could as a kid. Like this may not make any sense- but when I was a kid before everything? I liked talking to people. It wasn't a chore. I didn't have to overanalise everything. But now it is. I quickly finish up talking to people thinking something like "Thank god that's over" or "Thank god that didn't go badly" and it's so. Fucking. Tiring.

So I'm gonna be alone forever. Not because of some incel bullshit. But just because I literally can't do it. I just can't fucking do it right. I can't go back to being 8 and being excited to meet someone new. I can't even go back to being 19 and bring willing to try making friends.

I'm 28. And I've spent most of my life being lonely.

And he's like- you've got the autism support group- but we meet once a month and I sometimes can't even MAKE it due to work and there's acquaintances. I don't even know most of their NAMES.

And it all just sent me into a tailspin honestly. Like the day was okay until he decided to be himself and trod over some exposed nerves. Then run his fucking jeep over them for good measure.

He's like "your like van goth" and I'm like "he killed himself" and he says "but you won't do rhat" and honestly dad? There's still fucking time. Better 17 years late than never huh????

Fuck, I needed to get that off my chest. I can't stand him. I really can't. But I kinda have to because I want to still know mum and nikara.

It's just amazing how he can just. Always find a way to ruin my day. Today was supposed to be good. It's autism group meet up night. I'm supposed to take Rochelle and one of brodies friends there. But I think if I go tonight I'll just be a miseryguts and cry everywhere. And I've got a surprise work shift tomorrow from 7-3pm. And then my fucking On Week at work. Despite not really having much time off from it and work doing a number on me even during my fucking off week this week. It's just not worth going oh my fucking God I hate this.

[inkedmyths]

S2: E5 "Simon Said"

Brought to you by Kayla was bored and I was bored enough to continue AND ALSO THIS WAS A MONTH AGO I'M SORRY

This ep featuring: Murder suicide, demon touched pussy, grand theft auto, and yet another fucked up brotherly parallel

Silas: UR STILL ON SEASON 2? Crepe: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES Melon: They’ve been watching at a rate of one-two episodes every two weeks. We’re gonna be here for the long haul (years) Me: Bc I have been busy <3 Silas: BYE I THOUGHT UD BE AT 3 AT THIS POINT HAGAHAYUGADG Me: SHUT UP SILAS Silas: SO MEAN TO ME

[ There is a brief interruption as I'm about to start because my mom walked in to make a joke about being a bad influence. This has nothing to do with Supernatural. She has never watched it and refuses to. A wise decision, probably. ]

What the fuck? What the fuck

[ The peanut gallery continues to make fun of my slow watch rate. I ignore them in favor of staring in bafflement at the screen. ]

Vision? Flashback?

Visions!!

[ Aspen now enters the chat, making a comment that they were just thinking about how long its been since the last time. ]

UHHH

DAMN HE JUST COMMITED A MURDER

MURDER SUICIDE

Oh hello Sam

Back at it again with the evil visions huh

[ Why the fuck does Aspen have a teletubby emote. ]

Dean beloved your phrasing needs work. Its so bad <3

The bar all goes 👀 when the boys walk in

Does. He

He has no pants. Ok

THATS PRETTY DAMN SPECIFIC SAM

WHSHSGSGS

[ Kayla at last arrives, late as hell for someone so invested in me watching this. ]

REO SPEEDWAGON...

DEAN.... WHSHSGSG SINGING IT IN DEAD SILENCE IN THE CAR

Okay so we are tracking down another kid who might've been visited by the demon

LAWYERS

LEFT HIM AN ESTATE

GUYS ISN'T THIS LIE TAKING IT A BIT FAR—

Kayla: nah. its funny

Barbarian Queen riding a polar bear...

WJSHDH DEAN "I don't know, I'm starting to like this dude. That van is sweet."

I mean it is a reasonable connection that so far these uh. Idk. Demon touched psychics? Are violent?

And like Sam has a point, hunting is killing and violence, even if Dean is pretty keen on separating that completely from normal murder

Kayla: read that notif as demon touched pussy. i was like shit fr? Me: DEMON TOUCHED PUSSY.......

Dude actually I'm with Dean on this one. This guy fucks

Literally, judging from the girl waving at him

Dean thats not subtle.... why can't you guys be subtle..........

DID. DID HE JUST STEAL THE CAR

IN TEARS.

DEAN HE JUST STOLE YOUR CAR

WHAT

He's like some kind of? Affects minds?

"He full on Obi-Waned me" HELL YEAH LET'S GO STAR WARS REFERENCE ON MAY THE 4TH

OH SHIT MAN JUST WALKED INTO TRAFFIC

Dr Jennings...?

Ok ok...

WJSHSH "AND OJ WAS GUILTY"

I can't believe this, this is so funny

The guy LITERALLY stole Dean's car and he's still like "Man this guy FUCKS I can't be mad at him"

Dean viewing his van with a disco ball and a bong: This guy is so real

Guy has a thing for weird eccentric guys in long coats I guess

MOBY DICKS BONG

OH SHIT HE APPEARS

IT NOT HIM IT SOMEONE OR SOMETHING ELSE?

What the fuck?

Oh fuck? What the fuck what is happening?

OH HE HAS A BROTHERRRRE

OH OH I SEE

OH THIS FUCKIN GUY

I SEEEEEEE

Sam buddy you alright

OH THE GIRL

His long lost twin was jealous?

Or something? Why the murder

Damn Sam these visions are sucking worse and worse huh

Ohhhh weird weird creepy fucker

OH HE'S WEIRDLY? WEIRDLY OVERPROTECTIVE? WHAT THATS EVEN CREEPIER

The constant weirdass parallels to the Winchesters huh

Whaaaaaat the fuck

LMAO (jedi mindtricking) "You really don't want to do this" (gets punched)

What in the fuck is happening here

Dude what

Yeah exactly!! Just talk to your brother like a normal person

THE MAN WITH THE YELLOW EYES

Kayla: you wanna know a funny story abt him Kayla: he actually has a name Kayla: however when i first watched his whole section (i was 10 i think) i decided that the man w the yellow eyes was too long Kayla: this was pre name reveal Kayla: so i Kayla: named him. Kayla: his name was jeffery. Kayla: i stand by that. Me: WJDHDHD Crepe: JEFFERY

Ohhhhh poor Andy :((

I love Andy I would die for Andy he was just living his life and his twin had been got by the demon so he showed up and was a murderous bastard

AUAUGH

DEAN NO

Sam is at his ropes end, Dean is deciding that ignoring things is the best option

Oh fuck shes onto them

Well fuck. Broke pattern, who knows how many weird psychics the demon has tabs on

Aaaaand end episode

Damn!

---

Okay, really interesting episode. I stand by that I would die for Andy, I hope he's okay after all of this nonsense.

But it's definitely setting up some crazy shit with psychic people... wonder where this is going... genuinely. I have no idea. But its probably not good!

[the-punforgiven]

It's me tag

was tagged by @catfacedvampire It's been ages since someone last tagged me in one of these lmao

- Are you named after anyone?

No, apparently my name was a fairly last-minute affair when I was born and my mother took one look at me and realized I'd make a terrible Wolfgang

2. - When was the last time you cried?

December 18th, 2022. I wouldn't remember were it not for Discord timestamps lmao I had accidentally double-dosed on my antidepressants and was weeping tears of love and joy over the fucking Claymore being in Elden Ring while I was mid-shift at work

Interesting day, that was

3. - Do you have kids?

No. Don't really plan to either, not on my budget, and given I was crying over a sword in a videogame barely a month ago I don't think I'm mentally fit for one either lmao

4. - Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Yeah

5. - What's the first thing you notice about people?

Usually either their hair or clothes tbh, I'm faceblind as shit lmao

6. - What's your eye colour?

Idk either brown or green, depending on the light

7. - Scary movies or happy endings?

Idk honestly I love the horror genre but my tastes are so insane, weird, and specific that I also don't love a huge chunk of the horror genre and would prefer like, literally anything else Also I'm just a sucker for characters being happy, so sue me I like that things can work out alright as long as the story preceding it isn't boring lmao

8. - Any special talents?

I'm surprisingly good at playing music on like, small things that play notes that it isn't super expected to actually play music on, like how I used to be able to play the tetris theme on my mother's old cell phone keypad when I was like 12, or how I can play Unwelcome by Arsis on the Warframe Shawzin now

I used to be able to play the intro to Through The Fire And The Flames on Big Band's trumpet in Skullgirls back when I played that, but it's been a while and I'm pretty certain all my muscle memory for that game's long gone lmao

9. - Where were you born?

That weird little dirt orb that sometimes shows up between Venus and Mars

10. What are your hobbies?

Art, making stupid little tunes in Beepbox.co, fighting my friends with swords (highly recommend), Whatever you call the Fromsoftware Souls Game Brainrot that possesses you and makes you do co-op forever, loving it deeply and never tiring of it @mutuals I am begging you to play Elden Ring with me PLEASE Making music with instruments and my voice outside of Beepbox.co (though admittedly I've been having more fun goofing off with Beepbox lately lmao)

11. Have you any pets?

BEHOLD

12. What sports do you play/ have you played?

I don't play sports, but I have an interest in fencing, though idk how well I'd play with not only a light whippy sword (I'm a longsword kinda person at heart) as well as having a sword restricted to only one hand (again, I'm a longsword kinda person at heart)

13. How tall are you?

idk like 6'3 I think? (Don't let my sister lie to you, she keeps telling everyone I'm 6'4 and I can't make her stop)

14. Favourite subject in school?

I barely remember school at all tbh but the student councilor also ran a creative writing class that was rad as hell, though I don't remember more than like three things that happened in it over the two years I was taking it lmao I also remember liking art class, but I was so bad with rules I'm kinda surprised I passed lmao, I just doodled whatever the fuck every day and the teacher was just like "Yeah sure, this'll do" and passed me lmao

15. Dream job?

Tbh Daisuke Ishiwatari is already living my ideal career path and I haven't thought of anything else I really want to do yet

That's a lie I just like, really deeply want to be in a shitty metal band made up of friends that tours in a van who doesn't sound all that great but you can tell is just pouring their fucking hearts out up there and so you kinda forgive them because the performance is just so raw even if the technical skill isn't great and there may be some issues with the faulty electronics and at least one of them hasn't changed their strings in like four years but they sound good they love what they do and they're easy to headbang too so like, what more do you need, really?

Idk who to tag but like, if you wanna do this, feel free to do it and just like, say I tagged you in it, I won't tell

[chronicals-of-top-surgery]

~2 months post OP, too many days to count now lmao. 8/10/22

Ok, i know I barely updated for the entirety of July and that's terrible of me, but I've been kept extremely busy by having one month to pack up the place I was living at to move into my new apartment. I finally moved a few days ago and I've finally settled in at least a little. There's a lot of unpacking to do but either way, let me go over milestones I missed in July.

So, early July I started sleeping regularly on my side. It didn't hurt that much which was great, still couldn't sleep on my stomach at all. mid July, I went swimming! We went to a water park and I got to swim a bunch. I was careful and it's not like I was doing laps and shit, but I went down a water slide a few times and just did some gentle swimming and tbh I think that helped me a lot. It helped me gently stretch the muscles and skin without a ton of strain and I feel like I got way more confident after this. Late July I started work again but I was very keen to let them know I'm not doing heavy shit. I refused to lift stuff over my head or do super heavy lifting, I was not going to do deep cleaning scrubbing, and even just doing light stuff, I came home pretty sore at times. I also got a massage and laid on my stomach and it actually wasn't that bad! It helped a LOT with the tension and aching sensation in my back from being stagnant for so long while healing.

I'm certain that all of the sutures have dissolved away and my scars look magnificent! Both nipples are attached well and look great, though the left one, around the top of it, it has a bit of a lip to it because of the scabbing, but it's actually starting to smooth out and become flush. I don't have a ton of sensation still but I have more than I used to. I can feel the pressure of something now, so if you drag a pen across my chest, I can feel the pen there only because of the pressure into my muscles. I can't feel feather light touches or anything. Except my sternum, I think I have almost full sensation in my sternum.

I start classes late this month and I also start working again at the store I transferred to. It's been an extremely hectic time, moving all my stuff, helping my mom and sister move out of the state my sister went to college in, then making sure I had everything to start MY college. It's been a lot, no doubt about that, and I know my stress levels need to be brought down. I'm excited though! This is a new city that I already really enjoy and it's full of new opportunities for me. I went to college before but dropped out to focus on getting a job and bettering my mental health, not to mention save up for top surgery. Unbeknownst to me, I quit at the perfect time because right after I quit and moved states for a new job (twice), covid hit! I'm happy to be going back when this college has figured itself out, mandating vaccines, knowing how to use online schooling better, etc.

So, now here I am! New name, new body, new city, fresh start! I can't wait to start again and see where life takes me. As always, I'm going to try and keep updating, even if it takes me a hot while to do it, because I want to keep these memories here for my benefit and for the benefit of everyone who may be curious about the healing process and timeline of top surgery. I'll see y'all in the next update, be safe, you're loved, and obligatory drink some water <3

[2004videovixxxen]

random late night thoughts i have about my ex that i should come back to when i feel like i'm missing him

not my ex hating my cole tattoo because it's another man tatted on me? the tattoo is done poorly and it's literally an outline of his head and hair from like.. 9 years ago lmao after we broke up he dead had the nerve to say "yeah i like j cole now" ?????????? little dick energy fr, meanwhile, the guy i like has a cole acronym tatted on his arm (i was going to get it tatted but never got around to it) and we took a picture of our tattoos together and talked about how much we love j. cole and how his music inspires us to be better people. (my ex asked me why would i say i love j. cole and i was like i mean it in the way that i love what his music does for me, how it makes me feel, the way he writes and tells a story, not in the way that i want to fuck him) he didn't care. i can't wait to get this damn signature tattoo covered up, i didn't want to honestly but the way i need to stop being the only one who cares!!!! (and not me and my crush getting wine drunk and he asked me "would you ever get someone's name tatted" and i was like "ummmmm hello!" and he was like "i was trying to figure out what that meant" and we laughed and he was like "yeah you def gotta cover that up and do mine") lmao i love how opposite they are emotionally because i need a lover boy heavyyyyyyyy like YES BE ALL ABOUT ME AND DONT THINK ABOUT IT FOR THE NEXT FUCKING 8 YEARS !!!!!!!!!

2. omg i just thought about this man waiting til after we broke up to say "and there were women who were telling me they were waiting on him to be single" like??????? when men were telling me that shit i would tell him cause i thought it was hilarious but whole time he had people saying this to him and never thought to share???? why did he keep so much shit to himself and wait til after we broke up to express his feelings???? why is he so emotionally underdeveloped omfg.. i asked one thing of him and that was to not tell me things after the fact!!!!!!!! cause he literally waited like 3 months to tell me the other half of the story of his roommate trying to fuck him where he said "im not gonna lie her pu$$y was wet" HOW WOULD U KNOW???????? did i get cheated on bro???? bUT HE LEFT ME CAUSE IM FUCKING GORGEOUS lol k

3. oooffff how about him and i sharing porn with each other, well honestly, i think i shared some things i've watched maybe once or twice, but i've seen on more than numerous occasions what he was into and it never bothered me- until i also just remembered that my sexuality was a big factor in our breakup and the only reason i was oozing sexy vibes was because he stopped having sex with me on the regular like we did! and when we talked about it he made it seem like i was obsessed with sex or only liked him for his dick which is crazy cause i liked him before i ever fucked him, i loved him before any of that, it just grew into a bigger love and became romantic. he was the one who always tried to have sex when we were friends.. he's the one that used to send me videos of him fucking a different woman every night... he's the one that initiated a threesome between us.... he's the one that continued to follow women that he fucked and only told me about it bc i was going somewhere they would be at.... i'm not upset or bothered actually just finding myself having little realizations here and there about how much more i loved that man than he ever claimed to love me. and i know this because i put up with SO much BEFORE us ever getting together thinking "this really fucking hurts right now but it'll be worth it because one day you'll be together" and THAT was actually delusional. not saying i was perfect but aside from me going crazy ONE night, LOL, i never put him through the ringer of [making him feel like i was finally ready to be with him and then go and tell him i actually might be getting into a relationship.. with someone else... even though i told him many times it's not for me right now.......... and then when i let him know a year later that i'm actually forreal forreal ready and i want to be exclusive... he finds out i'm still fucking other men... that i had just met the week AFTER telling him i want to be together].......... LOL yeah, i was suuuuuuuuuuch a dumb bitch for this guy like the least he coulda did was buy me something nice! asking to go out to dinner was just too much omg ???? how you say you're my best friend and don't know i'm literally okay with some cheap snacks and wine in the park???? idc just wanted to spend time and NOT ONLY when it came to his god damn music.... i literally slept on an air mattress that constantly deflated annnnddddd a twin size (he is 6'2 i am 5'8) where i basically cuddled the wall AND DINNER WAS TOO MUCH??????? yall????

4. he complained about money as if i didn't have a job too???? but me offering to pay didn't sit right with him so i honestly stopped but he never shared with me his true thoughts about it like i said he kept a lot to himself, how tf am i supposed to be the best partner i can be if u dont fucking tell me anything??????

5. when he talked about moving into a new place it was "his place"... we were dating for almost TWO YEARS but we couldn't live together because according to him it was smarter for us to live separately............................... i'm shocked i didn't accuse him of cheating on me right there because bitch what???? i was at his place all the time with ROOMMATES so u getting ur own spot isnt an invitation for me to move in?????? i can pay bills??? but again goes back to the whole "keeps everything to himself" he could talk about his skeptical thoughts on irrelevant shit for 4 hours straight but the real life shit? LOL K

6. to be honest...... the worst thing he ever did to me was give up on our relationship. he gave up on it because i sexted some dude, no i didn't send nudes i just suggested sexual acts between us, it never happened tho. and this was WHILE WE WERE ALREADY BROKEN UP????? he went through my phone while i was asleep. granted, i did the same to him and found WORSE shit than what i did and I FORGAVE HIM, we had gotten back together a month after this, and broke up again like 3 days later because i hit him in the chest because he refused to talk to me?????? again with the keeping shit in. and then later proceeded to say "it didn't even hurt me" after making me feel completely awful for doing that, cause i dont do that but the way he wouldn't speak was getting to me. after this break-up is when i messged that guy, about 2 weeks later, because he gave me everything i gave him back and he took my key to his place, he didn't want to see me and wanted to talk on the phone about what we should do and that phone conversation went like this "we should do our own thing right now and i can't be mad at you if you wanna fuck other people, i might get my dick sucked you know but...." and what did he do? he got mad at me MESSAGING someone saying my sexuality got the best of me. okay. i only messaged him because i thought we were really over this time, i was two glasses of wine in and looking to be entertained, that's all. but the thing i realize now.... when he did the same thing to me, i didn't give up on us. i knew in my heart that it was just dumb talk and it didn't mean anything to him and that what we had could withstand those stupid messages, but apparently he didn't feel the same about me. i get it, i do. he just wasn't with it and that's okay, i'm not mad at him, i'm just expressing that i think it's dumb how he went about things. BUT this is my last time adding to this list because overall brandon was an amazing friend, my best friend, a great boyfriend, a wonderful lover, talented artist, devoted to his family, very goal-oriented and more more more. at the end of the day, i would not want to block his blessings by making him feel he HAD to stay with me LOL. i just never really got to talk to anyone about the things he did to me because i didn't want to tarnish his name or have anyone thinking he's a bad person because he's not, so hence why i've been ranting on here about him so much cause no one fucking reads this shit lmao so i think i'm done, unless i see him in my dreams again. i only want to focus on the present moment and what's to come, asé

[yeonjuins]

hey I’ve been feeling kind of uninspired lately and idrk to fix it.. like I have ideas and WANT to do them but when I open ps I cant do it. I even have ideas written down but nothing comes out when I try to follow through and I give up very quickly 😕

do u have this same problem or could this just be a personal thing ? I did just recently finish a big project that I’m really proud of 🫶🏾 so I could probably just be burned out? But that was weeks ago lmao

june anon - also I saw u answer my rec list so I’ll read that rn

(lengthy response! 1/2)

honestly i 100% get what you mean PAHAHA i feel like i'm constantly surrounded by inspiration and new ideas and it gets me pumped and motivated to begin creating but the moment i sit down and actually try to start, i have no idea what i'm doing whatsoever... then it spirals down a whole rabbit hole of 'my taste in xyz is significantly larger than my actual skill level'

likewise, i went into my summer so mentally prepped and ready to begin designing for yeonjuins a lot more and making silly little kpop edits or even venture off into bigger projects to challenge myself but alas, i felt so burnt out without even beginning. prior, i had finished a major design project in one of my classes (to which i ended up getting a 98% in so it was worth <3) which pretty much pushed my creative abilities all around. i sort of had the mindset that i'd go into summer being able to expand off of it but i didn't even begin to create things until what.... two months into my summer? and school being right around the corner now too? PAHAHHA

a lot of creatives will say this as well but you have to make a lot of shitty things in order to make good things. even if you are feeling uninspired and don't know what to make but you know you want to make things, make it. it'll probably end up shitty, you'll probably hate it and think you wasted your time, but literally, in order to make good shit, you need to make actual shit first LOL

there's a lot of, what i recently learnt was called, 'invisible work' that goes into making things. even with my he he ha ha graphics with yeonjuins that are just based around my silly little kpop boys, i do research, make sure all my references are correct, making sure i pull from the right sources, etc etc. it seems overwhelming at first, but if you just get down to the mindset that you need to just make something, whether it be good or absolutely awful, it's a lot less daunting.

one of my favourite favourite quotes is from this book called 'tiny beautiful things' by cheryl strayed. i cried my heart out to this book, and specifically, this part made me get down on my floor and sob.

“do you know what it is to be humble? [...] i’d finally been able to begin [to write again] because i’d let go of all the grandiose ideas i’d once had about myself and my writing-

so talented! so young!

i’d stopped being grandiose.

i’d lowered myself to the notion that the absolute only thing that mattered was getting that extra beating heart out of my chest. which meant I had to write my book.

my very possibly mediocre book. my very possibly never-going-to-be-published book. my absolutely nowhere-in-league-with-the-writers-i’d-admired-so-much-that-i-practically-memorized-their-sentences book. it was only then, when i humbly surrendered, that i was able to do the work i need to do.”  (page 57)

tldr: just make shit. there are so many scrapped versions of my gfxs people don't see and so many scrapped ideas that don't even see the light of day on this site. but i think that's also the beauty of being a creator ! you build resilience. you make shitty things to only then make good things. just be patient with yourself my love, ideas will flow when it all fits together but you need to allow for your ideas to flow first (":

[justagalwhowrites]

I really wonder how Doc is gonna react to seeing Tommy again! bc they’ve been friends for long yeah, but after finding out he helped with that explosion and going radio silent on everyone..

Which makes me wonder about another thing. I totally don’t understand the timeline in the show?? Joel says Tommy hasn’t been in contact for 3 weeks and we know he stopped contact when he got to Jackson.

Ellie and Joel start their journey in the summer/autumn (not exactly sure) and get to Jackson in the winter (I think around Christmas time. Bc you can see a Christmas tree in some scenes) So that’s anywhere between 3-6 months?

I know it’s the end of the world and everything but Tommy met, dated, married and got Maria pregnant in that short time? lmao and then goes “Maria is family” to Joel who hasn’t ever met or even heard about her before…… come on Tommy.

I know there’s a lot of Tommy lovers here but he’s a bit ridiculous isn’t he??

TAHMMY!!

The Doc/Tommy stuff is going to be interesting for a few reasons! 1) fireflies shit 2) both of them are going to have partners and the last time they saw each other they were still FWB and he was like a "hey bestie run away with me" (now they did keep in touch since and it was strictly friendship but still) and there are a few conversations that are going to happen around these things :D

The timeline is a bit wonky! I did a little googling when I was trying to time out the fic and I'm still kinda ehhhhh on the timeline that I decided to go with BUT for Tommy, here's what I'm doing timeline wise for Lavender:

July 2015: Tommy leaves the Boston QZ to go west with the Fireflies

Autumn 2015: Tommy arrives out west with the Fireflies

Autumn 2015 - Spring 2022ish: Tommy does various firefly shit. Somewhat terrorist adjacent because fireflies but ya know.

Spring 2022: Gets disillusioned with the fireflies, starts looking for a way out

Summer 2022: Leaves fireflies, stumbles upon Jackson and meets Maria. Continues contact with the Joel and Doc via radio by leaving Jackson and going to the radio tower a few times a month, is vague with both of them about any continuing firefly connections. Maria isn't a fan.

July 2023: Tommy and Maria decide to officially settle down and do the damn thing. Maria says "If we're doing this, you can't put us at risk by calling back to Boston all the time. You need to cut contact." Tommy is like "anything for you baby" and no longer goes to the radio tower.

Late August 2023: Joel, Doc and Ellie head west. Last contact with Tommy was more than a month ago.

So that's the timeline I'm working with! At this point in the fic, it's early-mid September and the walk to Jackson is going to take about 2 months-ish? Roughly 50 days since they're going to have some break days in there and I can't imagine they're hiking 12 hours a day with a teenager and a man in his 50s when his knees aren't great. That would put them in Jackson in early November - post Halloween but pre-Thanksgiving :)

[toasty-bat]

Ok this was going on too long to be put in replies so here we are. Tramp Stamp, the "pop rock" "band".

Okay so. The members. Marissa Maino, has released a few EPs in the past, as has the guitarist Caroline Baker. The drummer, Paige Blue, is a songwriter with a couple of published songs.

However, for each member their former music and style was COMPLETELY different to how they make music now. Sure, styles can change, but this much this quickly? They each apparently spontaneously dyed their hair similarly neon colours at around the same time, before even forming the band.

Their music is also weird. It's like Blink-182 of it was modernized and then diluted down to buzzwords only. It's also clearly supposed to be the sort of "riot girl feminist" stuff seen in pop punk in the early 2000s - except again, it's diluted and "off". Their lyrics all sound like something specifically crafted to appeal to Tumblr users and young people on TikTok, and it seems to bank on the idea that because the target is young, they won't really remember late-90s to early-2000s pop rock and so won't know why they sound "off".

The band has barely started existing, but despite having no sold songs or EPs or albums under their belt, they already have stan accounts, a well-established website, and well-designed merchandise at high prices. Not something a brand new normal band does.

They're VERY defensive whenever they're criticized for anything. Recently they were called out for stealing their name from another band, @/thetrampstamps-blog (these guys are real), to which they responded "we don't like white cis men!!". It was quickly pointed out that every member of their ""band"" is cis, and white.

Everything about them seems manufactured. Their brand-new instagram is full of clearly professionally taken shots in studio lighting with full professional makeup and hair (not necessarily weird for a band....unless that band was created less than a month ago and hasn't even released a debut EP yet). They regularly use outdated slang and act like when old people write teenage characters - for example, one of their TikTok songs contains lines like "Tumblr girl, sk8ter boy", "I'd rather die than hook up with a straight white guy" (????) and "it's some major fuckin tea".

Their lyrics and captions may sound plausible when they're separate, but when it's all put together it reads like an AI-generated Buzzfeed article about current youth trends.

Their website claims their music is "the kind of stuff women talk about with their friends, but no one has ever put it into this kind of music before" (this is apparently a quote from one of the band members.) I'm sorry, nobody has ever done this before? Doesn't your band claim to take direct influence from early-2000s feminist punk scenes?? Have you ever listened to a feminist punk band before, ms "definitely in a feminist punk band"???

As for the "we hate straight white men" stuff, one of the members is openly married to a straight white guy. Not saying you can't be married and also be a feminist pop punk icon, but..their entire thing is that they're "a brilliant voice on white-boy privilege and fragile masculinity". (That's supposedly another quote from one of the band members. Definitely a real human person thing to say).

The band claims to be emo as well, but couldn't recognize MCR music when asked to name MCRs most popular songs. Not that it's impossible, but how likely is it that an emo/pop-punk band taking influence from the 2000s and early 2010s doesn't know what MCR is???

(TW: Sexual assault, alcohol for this bit)

One of their songs describes raping a man by getting him drunk and pressuring him into sex. Whether this is industry-plant related or not, this clearly isn't some "voice for the youth" shit that anyone Gen Z is interested in.

The irony is that they're also connected to Dr. Luke, a cishet white male who owns their publishing house... and who has multiple SA accusations against women (notably Kesha)

(TW over)

Also, they claim to be Queer Punk, but 2 of them are openly cishet. Now, I don't believe you should pressure public figures into coming out, but I can say as someone who enjoys the queer punk scene, I've never seen a Queer Pop Punk band made up of 2/3 cishet people.

On one of Marissa (the singer's) tumblr accounts before it was deactivated, the DNI said "-Phobic against any sexuality, including straight!"

(...what about the whole "we hate straight men and we're queer punk"... thing...)

Tldr: Everything from their social media presence to the way they dress to their song lyrics/style sounds like something old people in suits would imagine appeals to the young generation. They specifically targeted punk and queer spaces and appear to exploit them, and in response to criticism they either explode at whoever is criticizing them, or they delete accounts and immediately recreate new ones.

At first it seems plausible that they're just weird, but the further down the rabbit hole you go, the less and less real it all is. It reaches a point where you see them post and it feels like you're watching an AI that was fed information on Gen Z and is randomly generating content based on that information.

(don't judge me I fell down the rabbit hole HARD ok lmao)

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, episode 17-20 thoughts! finishing up season two! the finale is the THIRD 2-PARTER OF SEASON 2. that's so many! I wonder how many season 3 will have?

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-UERGH WHY DOES VLAD HAVE AN AI WITH MADDIE'S FACE ON IT. SOOO CREEPY. AND MORE 'CREATIONS' waiiiit. vlad is Dr. Frankenstein! (despite his ghost design obviously referencing vampires) HE HAS 'CREATIONS' HE MAKES THEN WONT TAKE REAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR!!! this bitch.

-danny was late and his friends immediately start going off about how hes inconsiderate, and has been treating them like sidekicks??? he just overslept, my god. chill. even if he has, be nicer about talking about it with him?? he really can't help that he sometimes has to chase the ghosts, or has a secret identity to protect...

-'what kind of ghost haunts a miniature golf course' umm. me as a ghost. next question

-imagine going home and theres a tiny child on your bed claiming to be your cousin. with as many cousins I have, I would probably believe her. but the 'ran away from home' BIT....SHES 12?? SHES SO TINY. I hate that they have her belly out in her ghost form, but I like how her colors are asymmetrical. something about her design...maybe the proportions?? are weird to me...anyway danny was good to feed her, but he shouldve taken her to his parents FIRST. or, tbh, probably jazz. (JAZZ DIDNT EVEN GET TO MEET HER!!! NOOO. I mean she said she'll be BACK BUT STILL)

-ANYWAY. shes voiced by AnnaSophia Robb, the girl who was in because of winn dixie, played as violet from charlie and the chocolate factory, and was the girl from bridge to terrabithia. (the movie that made me cry hysterically when I was 12 and I never watched it again because it Broke Me!) thats super cool.

-vlad sucks: the episode, basically. what's new!! I love how he's like, I'm Not A Villain. *immediately cuts to him torturing danny to make him transform, to get mid-transformation DNA, to perfect a Clone.* *immediately shows that he doesnt give a shit about his new daughter Dani and just wants a ''more perfect clone'' and will put her in danger to get that. will let her DIE to get that*

-Dani is danny's clone and is a girl? transgenderism....one of them has to be trans. or they both are.

-dani just. leaving at the end. WHAT? SHES 12. DONT JUST. NO!!! SHE WAS PROBABLY JUST BORN, A MONTH AGO AT MOST, RIGHT?? SHE NEEDS...SOMEWHERE TO LIVE. MONEY? FOOD?? A FAMILY?? AN EDUCATION???! WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S LEAVING!!! OKAY BYE I GUESS!!! D: concern!!!

-the next ep opens with skulker chasing a ghost down. ...does skulker count as a ghost hunter in the way valerie and danny do? I mean, sure, he hunts the good guys too, but he. he hunts ghosts...also, we haven't seen his Real Form since his debut episode! tiny...

-the guys in white are back! ngl, I assumed they were a gag for that one episode. you're telling me they might actually be a threat? ok.

-valerie in her lil nasty burger uniform looks so cute!! glad shes not in that mascot uniform this time. I guess she stopped hiding that she's working there now?

-gregor having white hair, dressed in black and white...and green eyes...sam has a Type, I guess.

-danny being unnecessarily hostile about gregor. danny!!! hes been nice so far. he looks a little...tall to be 14, but. danny doesnt know anything about him! (he does Suspect, but...you cant just spy on people and be rude to them from a hunch.) also, gregor kissed her, and when she freaked out, he was like 'oh no!! sorry, we can take it slow! I understand!' which was NICE. I hate jealousy plots still tho.

-altho. umm. tucker, being concerned about danny spying on them??? SAM AND YOU WERE SPYING ON DANNY AND VALERIE A FEW EPISODES AGO!!!!! im not saying its RIGHT, but dont be a hypocrite!!! AND THEN SAM BEING MAD ABOUT IT, TOO.

-DANNY IS A 7 ON THE SCALE OF ECTOPLASMIC POWER!!! out of 10? so I want to know where the other ghosts rank...I mean it's a list from the guys in white, so, it may not even be accurate, like, they havent seen ALL of his powers, have they?

-Lancer being like 'im not cooperating with the FEDS' until they said they could access his tax records. they already did that joke with jack, but like, its still funny. kings of tax evasion.

-tucker's aggressive third-wheeling. but gregor being super into it. gregor/tucker is the real ship here. then gregor kissing danny on both cheeks after hugging him. bi poly king gregor. (he does turn out to be a liar with a phoney accent. unsurprising, BUT THE CONCEPT OF HIM BEING GENUINE AND THEM ALL DATING IS FUN)

-THE...GUYS IN WHITE THINKING GREGOR IS DANNY PHANTOM. LMAOOO. GET HIS ASS. or,, Elliot. lmfao

-sam saying tucker is part of the package because theyre friends was super sweet <3 but also 'part of the package'...polyships are obviously the solution to these dumb jealousy/love triangle plots.

-danny crashed a whole plane. the collateral damage...

-is he....

-you know....

.... (ITS NOT GAY IF YOU'RE DOING IT TO PRETEND TO BE SOMEONE YOU'RE NOT, AND LIE TO A GIRL. RIGHT? he was getting a little too into pretending to enjoy tucker's company, and the above...c'mon, guy.)

-lmao, freakshow is in actual prison. I didn't expect a follow up, or for him to show back up! in the finale of this season, too!

-THE SICK TATTOO GHOST IS NAMED LYDIA!!! more Lore On her. freakshow seemed genuinely concerned about her. also, is she mute? I don't think she talked the first time we saw her, either. and we didn't know freakshow 'envied' ghosts, either, the first time, we just knew he was controlling them. interesting!

-...they literally stole the infinity gauntlet from marvel and called it the reality gauntlet. is that legal. what the fuck. even with the gems in the lil slots, having different powers...they had freakshow in jail, but didnt check his pockets??! hes just still in his lil outfit??? what kind of ...oh, its in amity park. yeah, all of the adults are idiots, okay, sure.

-'freakshow!' 'in the anemic flesh!' dude take some iron pills then. also, sure, the red eyes could be contacts for his aesthetic, but the whites of his eyes are yellow! does he have jaundice?! he severely needs more...like, every kind of vitamin. (this is what im worried about as freakshow attacks danny with giant robots)

-again, goth circus is a sick theme, and I love his goth train.

-oh FUCK every single person saw danny transform. on a stage. including his parents via TV. oh god. the guys in white and immediately like 'youre coming in for experiments!' SCARY. at least the crowd is willing to help him to escape...perks of now being a local celeb! even the kids at school are accepting :) this is what, the third time his family has found out? its always been an alt timeline tho. and danny fully intending to just rewrite things again instead of...I dunno, trying to roll with it this time? hes really worried his family won't accept him, huh...

-'maybe our son IS THE GHOST BOY, but its not as if our family's ghostly activities have EVER PUT YOUR FAMILIES IN DANGER' maddie. mmmmmmmmmmmm. okay.

-danny 100% prepared to run away from home because of this :( oh :( and saying his parents are 'looking for him, or a scalpel to dissect him with' ouch...

-THE GUYS IN WHITE TRYING TO ARREST A 14 YEAR OLD. fuck da feds.

-side note (another one about voice actors...) freakshow's voice actor, Jon Cryer, was lex luthor in pretty much every DC tv show, which is why I recognized his voice, because my dad loves those shows so I've seen a good bit of them without seeking them out...)

-the old man saying 'hey, i still had minutes left!' and danny saying 'you gotta watch those roaming charges!' about danny destroying the people in the diner's phones so no one could report seeing him...would kids today understand these things. can you even BUY minutes anymore...I remember my first phone being a flip phone, and the fact I always had minutes when my sister ran out super fast, because I didnt have friends calling or texting me like she did...:/

-the fentons being genuinely like 'why didnt danny trust us and tell us this, we love him :(' and JAZZ LAYING INTO THEM WITH THE 'DISSECTION/MOLECULE BY MOLECULE' LINES. LITERALLLLY. they need to apologize

-technically, lydias stronger than you! -jazz lesbianism moments! when did you even learn her name!!! but also get freakshows ass. lydia is also cooler looking. looove her design sm still.

-jazz psychoanalyzing freakshow... (also, her also having ghost envy? au where jazz is a ghost!! id like to see it)

-im glad the kids still got to go to their respective vacation things, even if they cant really stick around and enjoy them much...

-furry: confirmed. (also tucker calling her hot. tucker is a furry confirmed)

-danny being mad someone at the comic con is selling comics of him without permission, lmfao. give him his royalties!

-freakshow > thanos because hes a drama clown and does use his gauntlet to be FLASHY AND DRAMATIC.

-jazz's 'USE PYSCOLOGY' to danny about freakshow LMAOO. AND THEN IT WORKING. but, oh, freakshow's ghost form sucks. I like him as a clown better tbh. good thing danny took away his ghost powers!

-his parents hugging him and saying theyre proud :"( and saying 'of course you lied to us, we never gave you a reason not to!' and saying they were in the wrong basically for always talking about hurting ghosts aaaa :""(

-then he WIPED THEIR MEMORIES AGAIN!!! FUCK. I can understand him wiping the goverments/student bodies' memories, but why his parents?? they were being accepting!! ARGHHH. season 3 couldve been them all trying to adjust to them knowing!

-I know, on a meta level the showrunners probably wanted to just reset things to the status quo of him having a secret identity. But. We've been doing that for (2) seasons, I'd love if season 3 could be like, his parents adjusting to this and trying way harder to learn more and accept it (and the shenanigans that could come from that) and for fun, if he didn't wipe the students memories, it could be him being popular for a while, then everyone slowly realizing, oh, he's still Danny. Like. he might have ghost powers but hes Just The Same Guy instead of putting him on a pedestal (and seeing them all try and help him hide it from the giw/people who don't know!!)

-fuck they didn't even explain WHY he wiped everyone except sam, tucker and jazz's memories. he just Did It right when his parents were saying they loved/accepted him!! and sam and tucker didnt question it at all!!! HELLO??? very annoyed about this turn of events.

-anyway. onto season 3! I know its shorter than the first two seasons, and is the last season... I might just do it in 2 bursts if I can... :3c depends on the episodes' content and how much I want to say about each!

[diningwiththeasquiths]

Thank you for the tag @talyx-rex! ❤ (I found your explanation for the 'Rex' part of your username very cool btw!)

1. Why did you choose your url?

It's a very obscure reference to the movie 'Wilde'. There is this one scene where Oscar Wilde is talking to his wife while his son is crying very loudly. He basically flees and uses "I shan't be back till late, I'm dining with the Asquiths" as his excuse. Instead, he visits his lover Robbie Ross and the two of them have sex. So I use "dining with the Asquiths" as a euphemism for gay sex and therefore thought it would be a fitting url. 😆

2. Any side blogs?

I could have sworn I made @bandofsisters after watching Band of Brothers with @slashonmydash and @arc-en-disco, but I can't find it as my side blog anywhere. 🤔 It only has 1 post anyway, but I still love the username. 😁

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

Oh gosh... 9 years and 4 months.

4. Do you have a queue tag?

Nope! Not even back when I used to queue everything. But I do use a lot of other tags because I like to be organised. 😌

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

Wayyy back in the day I was really into BBC Sherlock, and Tumblr suddenly was the place to be. I think I moved there from deviantART and LiveJournal. (Man that Sherlock fandom has not aged well imo lol.)

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

Oscar Wilde apparently decorated his rooms with objects like peacock feathers.

Learning about him and his life inspired me to try and accept/love myself more and not be ashamed/scared to show my true self. (Something I struggle with to this day.)

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance, after all. 😊

7. Why did you choose your header?

Same reason lmao. Plus, peacock feathers look so prettyyy! ❤ I love their aesthetic. 😄

8. What’s your post with the most notes?

This Hannigram one lmaooo (51k, not bad!)

9. How many mutuals do you have?

26 (oops that's low)

I actually don't follow back a lot because I like an uncluttered dashboard, but I do haunt certain tags (#armitagehux, #gingerpilot and #kylux mostly) and will often click on users to scroll through their wonderful blogs. 😊 So if we're not mutuals that doesn't mean I don't like you!!!! Au contraire, I pretty much adore everyone in this amazing (Hux/Gingerpilot/Kylux) fandom. ❤❤❤

10. How many followers do you have?

899 (which is still quite shocking to me lmao)

11. How many people do you follow?

69 (nice)

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

Oh yes. I'm not an artist so my fandom contributions are mostly shit posts (and more recently, ficlets!). 😌

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

To my horror I was drawn into a discussion (about freedom of speech in writing/art) at the beginning of this year. It definitely made me reconsider what I initially said. Because I do listen to other people and am very willing to learn. 😊 Overall I dislike fandom drama and tend to stay far away from it.

15. How do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

The superstitious ones slightly annoy me. 😆

My heart goes out to the really important ones, but I'm more of an activist on my other social media accounts; my Tumblr blog is mainly my safe space for fandom, fun, venting and inspiration stuff. 😊

16. Do you like tag games?

I do, very much! Feel free to tag me in anything. 😁

17. Do you like ask games?

Yes, although I rarely do them because I'm terrified nobody will send me any lmao.

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

Ummmmmm... That would be @blackkingsdream and her amazing art, of course! 😍

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

Not at the moment no. Fun fact: I once had a mutual that became my girlfriend. 😍❤ Sadly, I ended it many years ago, for various reasons. Still, I have many happy and fond memories of our time together. I feel very lucky to have had those experiences. Truth be told, nothing has ever come close to that, even though it certainly wasn't perfect. (And I do feel the occasional regret lol, but that's a pointless emotion.)

20. Tags

Oh gosh ummm... God I'm always shit at tagging people because I don't want anyone to feel pressured or bothered by me. 🙈

Okay um, @dark-lord-of-the-simps consider yourself tagged if you want to do this! 😊

Also anyone else who might be interested; you are tagged now too! 😁

[reminiscing-writer]

Off The Deep End

-

Warnings: none for this chapter. Starts with fluff, ends with angst. But shits gonna hit the fan lmao

-

-

Spencer pulls up the comforters in an attempt to cover his ears from the horrendous alarm that was enveloping his room.

“Make it stop," he grumbled into an empty bed.

"It's been ringing for a little more than an hour now," he heard his favorite voice from the attached bathroom of their bedroom, "it's about time you woke up, don't you think?" She peeked through the doorway, rolling her eyes with a smile at her sleepy husband.

"I have a better idea," Spencer mumbled sleepily.

“Oh?”

"You come into bed with me." He propped himself onto his elbow, barely managing to pry his open. He glanced over to the digital alarm clock on the bedside table which read 6:15 in bright red luminescent lights.

He inhaled a sharp breath slowly sitting up in bed, stretching his arms widely. The covers fell back onto the bed as he stood up and made his way into the bathroom.

"Excuse me," Amelia looked at her husband from the mirror. He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, resting his head on her shoulder. "Occupied." She giggles as he kisses the nape of her neck.

“Can you join me in the shower?” He asked his wife, looking at her big brown eyes through the mirror.

She turned to face him, smiling sweetly, “I'm already dressed, babe.” She puts on her earrings. “Sorry.” She apologized laughing at his disappointed sigh.

“You don't have to be at work ‘til 8. That's enough time for a second shower.” He rests his forehead against hers. He gives her a look up and down, thanking all the Gods he could think of for giving him an eidetic memory.

Her style was modest and girly. Floral prints and pastel colors. Lots of dresses and skirts (which she loved to twirl and spin in).

She quickly gives him a peck on his stubbly cheek, and squirms her way out his arms. “Get ready quickly. Breakfast will be ready in 20, and I would like to eat with you before I leave for the day.”

-

Pulling the buttons on his cardigan close, he rushed into the kitchen when he heard the bacon sizzle.

“Lia,” he grumbled, quickly stuffing a few raspberries in his mouth before she could stop him, “you spoil me.” He kisses her cheek.

She gives him a toothy, childlike grin.

She loved being appreciated and praised. It made her feel giddy. And, when she felt like that, she gave this adorable smile, which was one of the many things Spencer loved. Her two front teeth, and side canines displayed themself through her smiling lips.

“Should I do the omelette?” Spence offered as he set the table.

“I was thinking of no eggs today.” She answered, pouring pancake batter onto a second pan. When he gave her a questioning look- eggs being her favorite in the mornings- she just shrugged. “The smell has been setting my stomach off for a few days now.”

After he poured the duo Orange juice, the two quickly ate, cleaned, and rushed out the door. Both said their ‘I love you's’ and parted their separate ways.

-

Amelia, being a preschool teacher, had very simple hours. From 8am, until 2 in the afternoon. After that, she was home, and usually waiting for her husband's arrival.

Spencer didn't have such a predictable schedule. Sometimes he would come home around 5 in the afternoon. Other times, if he had paperwork he wanted to wrap up, he would stay late till nearly midnight. And, of course, if a case came up, he could be gone for days.

But, regardless, whatever his schedule may be for the day, he always, always, made sure Amelia was aware of it.

Today was no different. She got home from work at about half past two. She had a feeling in her stomach. One of much excitement. A part of her wanted to wait for Spencer to come home, but a bigger part wanted to find out before him. That way, she could surprise him if she was right. And, if she wasn't- well, at least, that way, he wouldn't be disappointed also.

She tossed her handbag onto the couch of her apartment, and made a beeline for the bathroom.

After a total of three minutes, she's on the bathroom floor, one hand over her mouth, her other hand holding tightly onto a plastic stick and her eyes flowing with tears.

Happy tears.

She couldn't believe her eyes. There it was. The pregnancy stick she had bought nearly four months ago, finally in her hands reading exactly what she was hoping for.

Two solid lines, screaming, that she was going to be a mother. She wanted to call Spence straight away. She wanted to scream it off the rooftops and to the world. She wanted to call her best friend, and her mother and sister-

But first, she obviously had to tell her husband. But, not like this. She couldn't say news like this over the phone. No, she had to surprise him.

So, that's exactly what she planned on doing. Very quickly, and very happily, she got to baking. And whisking, and piping. Soon enough, she had a dozen cupcakes baked and frosted.

Some pink with blue sprinkles, some blue with pink sprinkles. She had a few topped with candles which she planned to light right before Spence came home.

Which reminded her-

Amelia paused the music which was blasting from her cell phone, and dialed her significant other.

One ring, two ring , three r-

“Hello?” She heard his voice answer.

“Hey,” she smiled widely. “Still at work?”

He hummed, “Yeah, just about wrapped up. I should be home soon.”

Amelia's stomach was storming with butterflies and she was scared, thinking, somehow, that her husband would unveil her secret through the phone. “Hurry,” she bit her bottom lip, “I have a surprise for you.”

“Oh?” She heard his voice perk up, “Is this a family friendly surprise? Or, should I just come straight to the bedroom?” She could hear a smirk playing at his lips.

“Why don't you just hurry home, and you can see for yourself.” Amelia teased.

-

Amelia must've fallen asleep watching television, because, one moment, she's watching The Real Housewives reruns at 3 something, and the next, she's waking up feeling lost in sleep at almost midnight.

She feels discombobulated for a moment until she realizes she was waiting for her husband before her unplanned nap. Confused, she looks around her quiet, empty- very dark- apartment.

Sitting up on the coach, she grabs her phone and dials Spencer's phone, simultaneously turning on a nearby lamp.

He said he'd be home soon. She thought to herself. She swallowed hard, her sleep making her mouth dry.

No rings. Straight to voicemail.

Yawning, she goes to her contacts, and dials the next best number she can think of.

After two rings, she hears an all too familiar male voice. “Hey, Amelia.”

“Hey, Derek. Sorry for waking you.” She knew she didn't wake him. She could hear the television in the background.

“Nah, mama, it's cool. What, Boy Genius not letting you sleep?” He laughed. Amelia could hear Savannah asking Morgan who's phone call he was on so late at night.

“Um- actually, that's why I called. Boy Genius isn’t home yet.” Amelia stood from the spot she was in for the past few hours, “I spoke with him earlier, and he said he'd be home around 3-ish.” She fiddled with her fingers, and an uneasy feeling in her stomach.

She could feel the confusion on the other line as Morgan quickly made an excuse, “You know, he probably turned his phone off and didn't realize it. That man is basically a caveman when it comes to technology. You know that.” Amelia started pacing her living room floor, “Don't stress, I'll call him and figure out where he is.”

The worried wife bit her inner cheek, “Thanks, Derek. Again, sorry for bothering you and the missus.” She felt guilty.

“Nothing to apologize about, Kid. I'll figure out where Pretty Boy is, and when I do, I'll eat his ear off for you.” He snickered, making Amelia smile. “Get some sleep. He’ll be home soon.”

Amelia wasn't tight-knit with Spencer's team, but she were fairly close. They were his family after all. So, it felt natural having to call Derek Morgan when Spencer hadn't come home yet. He was basically Spence’s big brother.

Saying another round of ‘thank you’s and ‘sorry’s, Amelia hung up the phone. Turning to face her kitchen counters, she saw the cupcakes she had set out in wait for her husband. Pink and blue sweets littered the countertops.

She had an uneasy feeling stirring within her. Nothing like the one she had before taking the pregnancy test. No, that was excitement. This, what she was feeling now, was all dread. With every fiber within her, she felt a strong fear.

And rightfully so.

-

Spencer was on the nose when he said he was ‘just about wrapped up’. After the call with his wife, he was more excited than usual to get home.

Spence and Amelia had what an outsider would call, puppy love. They were young, and openly affectionate. They were in what seemed to be a never-ending honeymoon phase.

Being together for 5 years, three of those as married, Spencer still looked at Amelia as if she was the reason the sun shone every morning, and she was the one who put the stars in the sky.

This was no ‘puppy love’. This was an ‘old couple sitting on a porch watching the sunset love’.

Spencer quickly packed his satchel, and because he was the last to leave the office, shut off all the lights. Taking the elevator down and quickly jogging to his parked car, he throws his bag in the passenger seat, and just as he's about to get in himself, he hears a voice call for him.

“Um- excuse me?” The curly headed brunette looks up, over his shoulder. He sees a hunched over chubby man, standing at the entrance of the parking lot. The two men lock eyes, and the stranger shows Spence a paper map from the distance. “I was a little lost, and was hoping I could just get some directions.”

The FBI agent licked his lips, and stepped a few feet away from his vehicle. “Where did you need to go?”

The chubby man made a smile which was crooked, “Question seems to be where I am now.” He laughed.

Spencer walked closer to the man who opened up the map. “Well, you're here,” he pointed at a cross section between two streets.

“And, now, where would that leave the Fish Market on Drewry Street?” He asked Spencer.

“Well, on Drewry Street, for starters.” Spence gave half a laugh, locating the street on the map.

As he pointed with his index finger, he looked up and saw the man staring intently at him. A smile took place on his lips, and before Spencer could react, or ask any questions, he felt a blunt force hit the back of his head.

Stumbling back with a grunt, the tall helpful man grabbed the back of his head, feeling warm, what he assumed was blood. “What the- agh! Mmpph!” A hand covered the agent's mouth.

In lighting speed, a windowless van pulls up beside the men. The man behind Spencer pushes him into the back of the new vehicle. The once hunched, and seemingly harmless stranger, now stood taller than Spencer. He shut the door of the van, leaving a half conscious, fully confused Spencer lying in the back. He jumped into the passenger seat of the van, and the car sped off with a screech.

Leaving behind only a skid mark on the road, and Spencer's satchel in the car, the van was long gone before any bystanders could take notice.

[dolphin-enthusiast]

hello darling, nice to see you again! 🌺💕✨ hopefully today went well for you!! i'm glad to finally be laying down, as today was a little tiring, and what's a better way to end a day than talking to you~? 💖 (1/9?)

"let me tell you that i was not at all expecting a whole ramble about me being strong??? oh gosh, i have to admit that i was so touched, it made me cry a bit! i'm not usually told such sweet things, dio mio, i don't deserve you at all!! (2/9)

ooh, you play volleyball?? ahh that's so cool deary!! high-intensity meetings like that are quite anxiety-inducing, but I guarantee you'll do amazing amore, you're you after all 😉 don't be surprised if you see me at your games in the future, i'm always rooting for you after all 💋🌟 (3/9)

ahhhh i'm not so sure if i could be as good at ballet or figure skating as i used to be,, since it was so many years ago!! there's a lot of pressure since i used to be my ballet company's star dancer 🌸 i started ballet when i was 6 and figure skating when i was 8,, but both were cut short sadly, ballet due to a health emergency and figure skating due to a freak accident that occurred outside of skating,, (4/9)

ahhhh i'm not so sure if i could be as good at ballet or figure skating as i used to be,, since it was so many years ago!! there's a lot of pressure since i used to be my ballet company's star dancer 🌸 i started ballet when i was 6 and figure skating when i was 8,, but both were cut short sadly, ballet due to a health emergency and figure skating due to a freak accident that occurred outside of skating,, (5/9? i hope i didn't send this part twice haha)

oh my, i do wish i could do both of them again!! i still retain some skills from ballet, but lost the ability to skate,, now i can't go on the ice alone unless i'm with someone, and even then, i have to re-learn how to skate 😖 after i checked on the bunnies today, my family and i drove up to my older brother's university so we could all go out for a celebratory dinner since my dad got a new job offer!! (6/9)

he lost his job due to the pandemic, and we've been struggling for months with financial issues, so we're all very happy to have some stability again!! ✨ we went to a tavern and had a grand time, the food was nice but seeing my brother was even better! they had this amazing cherry cheesecake that i split with my sister, and the waitresses were so very kind; they kept complimenting me and my outfit,, oh my stars, it felt nice to finally be relieved of some of the stress!! 💗 (7/9)

and tonight, a friend challenged me to a game poker out of nowhere,, i have no idea why or what we're wagering, but he's going out of his way to buy and entire poker set for it??? an expensive one too, i am completely confused by it all 😅 i'll need to brush up on my skills before hand, seeing as i haven't played in months, but i'm sure i'll be fine hehehe! (8/9)

oh sugar, it's getting late now, guess that means it's sleepy time! i apologize for the shortness today, it's been long and busy! but goodnight my lovely morgy, i'll see you again in the morning! i'm wishing you peaceful sleep and a good day tomorrow 💘 - warm hugs from america, waifu xoxo 💌🌹🌠💝💞 (and if i'm not busy later this week, i'll definitely hit you up, and not just for aa ❤) ps: if it came to it, i'd wager my soul for you like jotaro did for kakyoin 😖❤ (9/9)"

As always im happy u enjoyed urself and had a full day (without huge amounts of work) love...unfortunately my day was absolutely awful due to personal stuff and it completely threw off my entire schedule and mood bc i was also planning to write so i'll have to see what i can do bc currently my motivation and overall state of mind said↘️↘️

Also not to pry but freak accident?? It really does sound mysterious yet at the same time its unfortunate really...im pretty sure u were mf amazing to be the star ballet dancer at such a young age too??? Honestly if u can ever pick up figure skating or ballet i say go for it 100%, i'd def come see ur shows👀👁️ (and thank u for cheering me on w the volleyball thing, it really is a lil anxiety inducing esp when ur around 5'3 lmao)

Im also glad to see things have gotten better w ur dad and his job, tbh my dad himself had a lowkey hard time w jobs at some point bc of the pandemic and we really felt like shit was gonna bc wack yet thankfully it didnt go like that at all shcjxjx and wow i love cheesecake?? As a matter of fact i had cheesecake myself today (raspberry cheesecake doe but still c l o w n t o c l o w n) ksksdn i also dont know poker but am a master at macao👁️ idk if its a romanian only cards game or nah but i get my gambling freak on each time i play it🤪✌️

Also w o a h isnt saying u'd wager ur soul for me a lil too far darlin thats a huge responsibility 😳😳😳