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hwaslayer · 6 months ago

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the space between us three (jyh) | two.

⇢series masterlist | series playlist

⇢summary: while juggling the demands of life, yunho continues to do his best to raise his independent 11 yr old daughter, seora. throughout the years, they've built a strong foundation, an unbreakable bond— one that consists of late night talks and food runs, father/daughter dates, and sideline cheerleading at her basketball games. so when you unexpectedly come into their world, things shift. despite the uncertainty and the fear of stepping outside of their comfort zone, yunho and seora eventually learn how to open their hearts and learn how to rebuild a home where three can thrive together.

⇢pairing: single dad!yunho x f. reader

⇢genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, single dad au | fluff, angst, eventual smut

⇢word count: 4.3k

⇢chapter content/warnings: cussing, the cliché coffee incident pls forgive me lol, parents pushing expectations, honestly not much but an intro to y/n and her family - bit of a filler chap!

"Can you visit mom and dad this weekend with me?" You nibble on the rest of your ramen while you wait for your brother to respond. You're currently sitting on a table outside near the trees, taking your lunch under the shade.

"Can't. I have plans with the boys."

"Wonwoo." You sigh.

"What? I promise, I'll head up there the weekend after. You can come with if you want. Sorry. I just planned this ahead of time and can't go back on my word now."

"Fine." You sip your water and toss your trash onto your tray before standing and throwing it into the appropriate bins.

"What, has mom and dad been on you again about us not visiting?"

"Kinda, yeah? You know how they always make passive aggressive comments because we don't come to see them often." You grab another cup of coffee, taking your time mixing it with half and half and some sugar. "It's always 'you two are always too busy for your parents!' or a 'it doesn't even take long to visit your parents!'" Your younger brother sighs as you quietly hand over some cash to the mobile coffee shop attendant.

"I know, but they also don't understand we've got our own things going on, too."

"I guess, yeah." You lick your lips and take a small sip, being careful enough to not burn your tongue from the scorching temp. "We really should do better, though."

It's not that your parents were bad. In fact, your parents were amazing. They had brought up both you and your younger brother comfortably and happily, sending you both to the best schools and supporting you until you two were able to fully walk on your own two feet, soar high with your own two wings.

It truly was just life.

You had gotten busy; always working at the hospital, growing from the bottom up, barely taking any of your vacation or sick days. If you did, it was because you had to or else you'd reach your max, or because you truly were rotting away in your death bed from a bad flu or food poisoning.

Otherwise, you were always at work. You were always with your girls. You were always going to lagree or bootcamp style studio classes. You were always doing something to occupy your time— mainly work. And the same thing goes for your brother, younger than you by 2 years.

He's just a boy.

But, he's your brother and you're incredibly close to him. He was always listening, was always good growing up. Would always protect you, especially from dumb boys and fake friends. He got good grades and went to college overseas before moving back home and settling down. Since then, he's always learned how to be on his feet— barely ever staying stationary. He, too, was always out with his boys. Working as a full-time software engineer, working out. Traveling when he gets the chance. Dating every now and then. But, you do love that he's living life and spending time with good people. He seems to have a good balance between his work and personal lives, which makes you happy.

It's just unfortunate that you two can't seem to manage slipping in more time with your parents. You both had agreed to do better about it, especially with your parents getting older.

"Are you still gonna see them this weekend, or are you gonna wait for me?"

"Yeah, I'll pop in for a second. I already told them I'd swing by."

"Hm." He hums. "Tell them we'll stop by for longer next weekend."

"Yeah, after I get the earful first."

"They won't." He clears his throat. "So, how's work been? Ate lunch well?"

"Yeah, I did. Work's been kinda crazy. They're opening this new department at the main hospital and it's expanding into the pediatrics side, too. We've been gearing up for it."

"Oh, really?" You nod as if your brother can see you.

"Yeah. They've been working with adult patients for their two studies, but they're going to start their pediatrics study soon. Pending on the IRB approval. But, once that's all good, they're hoping to secure their first patient, and we need to have everything ready to go."

"That's pretty cool."

"It is, but kinda hectic. Too many moving parts and people involved. It's a lot to keep up with."

"I'm sure you'll handle it well. You always do." You let out a small sigh before checking your watch and slowly walking back towards the peds hospital.

"Hope so. Work's been okay for you?" He chuckles.

"Same old! Nothing much has changed. Not like that, anyway."

"I see. So, what happened to that one girl you were seeing recently?"

"Uh, we're just better off as friends."

"Better keep that to yourself before mom starts setting you up on blind dates."

"Same goes for you. She'd probably go for you first. Been tryna marry you off." You roll your eyes.

"It's not my priority and she doesn't get that."

"She wants a grand baby and lowkey, I kinda want a nephew or niece to spoil, too."

"You're no help." He snorts. "Anyway, I gotta head back to my office and get some work done, I got a big meeting for that new department later today."

"Alright. Well, text me when you get home and try to take it easy."

"I will, you too, punk." Wonwoo chuckles. "Love you."

"Love you too!" And with that, the call ends. Your eyes are glued to your phone as you continue to walk back towards the hospital. The weather isn't too bad today, a slight breeze hitting your skin to balance out the warmth from the sun. You continue to switch between keeping your eyes in front, back down to your phone as you scroll through social media to catch up to things you've missed over the past few hours. When you finally get into view of the familiar building and the side lobby entrance, you slip in and head straight to the elevator without paying much attention— especially when it dings and slides the doors open for the individual behind to step out. You feel a soft thud; your body slightly coming into contact with theirs, causing some of your coffee to spill out of the opening on the lid.

"Oh— oh shit, I'm so sorry!" You look at the tall figure, wide-eyed as you survey his outfit to make sure your coffee didn't spill everywhere on his jacket.

"You're good." He says, eyes coming down to his jacket. There's a few drops of coffee dripping down near the zipper, but nothing that can't be fixed.

"I'm soooo sorry." You repeat as you dab a napkin at his jacket.

"No, seriously. It's fine. You're good." He laughs, brushing you off in a friendly manner. "Nothing laundry can't fix."

"Still another piece to add to your load." You look up at him and slightly pout. "Sorry."

"Maybe just be careful next time?" He gives you a small smile before he brushes past and out of the elevators. You realize he's got his large hand still propped up to prevent the elevator doors from closing on you, and you can't help but feel extra embarrassed. You do a tiny nod before he lets out a small chuckle and walks away, allowing you to be in your peace as you slip into the elevator and watch the doors close in front of you.

It just had to be him.

you: i almost spilled my coffee on a really cute guy ☹️

wonwoo: he'll def never come near you again. way to go sis 💗

you: you're a piece of shit

wonwoo: 🥰

You click your teeth and sigh as you step out of the elevator and onto your floor. You had been working as project manager supporting the pediatrics unit for about a year and a half now, starting at the hospital a few years ago as an admin associate and slowly working your way up.

"What? What's wrong, hun?" Your coworker and also one of your childhood bestfriends, Noeul, chimes in. She works as an HR manager, but her team sits nearby— giving you two the numerous opportunities to chit-chat and catch up in between meetings and tasks.

"I almost spilled my coffee on some really cute guy." She purses her lips together before giving you a toothless smile.

"I mean, you didn't, right?"

"No. Maybe a few drops. Now he'll have another piece of laundry to add to his load. All because of me."

"That's a good way to be memorable." You sigh. "I'm sure he wished he got your number."

"Wow, you're the complete opposite of my brother and I love that." She laughs.

"Of course, I'll always support you."

"How'd your meeting go?" She shakes her head.

"I don't know. So many sensitive issues. I think they only keep escalating and getting worse."

"Are you still dealing with that one manager and her staff member that weren't getting along?"

"Yup. That's exactly the thing that's getting worse."

"Sheesh. I hope they find middle ground soon, or at least find new avenues so they don't have to work with each other."

"Hope so too!" She looks at you. "When's your big meeting with the hospital people?"

"Hm." You hum and check your watch. "In the next hour." You settle at your desk and she follows along, sitting on the edge of the corner. "My inbox blew up over lunch so I gotta take care of a few things before I head over." You sip on your coffee.

"My busy bee." You give her a look. "Goodluck! Let me know how the meeting goes. I've gotta file a few reports and hop into a few other meetings myself. I'll see you later for a quick break?" You give her a small smile.

"Goodluck to you, too." She blows you a little kiss before she's prancing away to her desk, greeting people on the way over. You busy yourself before you need to start packing up and heading over to the main hospital, drowning in a few urgent emails that came in over your lunch break. Time sure flies when your brain is scattered everywhere, your to-do list seemingly never-ending and tossing you in a million different places at once.

You gather your things about 10 minutes before the meeting, which, doesn't give you much wiggle room in case you get lost. You don't go to the main hospital often, and you're not even sure if you have access to the room or how all of this would work. You are familiar with a few people also attending the meeting, but they're equally just as busy and are probably coming from other commitments.

You let out a small breath as you power walk over to the main hospital, happy you're at least getting your steps in for the day. You trickle into the huge lobby along with others, turning towards the left where the elevators are located. You press the button, waiting alongside a visitor as the elevator makes its way down from the 6th floor. You step in and patiently wait off to the side, checking your work calendar on your phone to make sure the meeting was indeed today.

Why does it feel like you're the only one heading over?

Were you the only one late at this point?

You step out of the elevator once you make it up to the 7th floor, pausing in your steps because— where the fuck do you go now? It was such a maze in this hospital, you didn't know whether to go left or right; the numbers on the doors skipping from one number to another. You turn to you right just because you go with your gut, hearing a trail of soft voices as you finally see a group of people heading towards a huge conference room further down [and definitely closer to your left had you just turned that way]. You pick up your pace, nodding and sending soft smiles to the familiar faces that catch you through the window of the room as they settle into their seats. Rushing over, someone is stationed at the door— probably waiting for you to make it inside.

"Thank you— oh, hi." You look up at the same, tall figure you damn near spilled your entire cup of coffee on.

"Hi." He gives you a toothless smile as he holds the door open for you. "Well, at least you aren't ramming into me with your cup of coffee this time." He jokes and you can't help but feel the heat rise to your cheeks.

"Yeah, mm'sorry about that still." You wince and slightly pout.

"I'm just joking. No worries. It happens." He smiles down at you, waiting for you to walk into the conference room. You give him another subtle, short bow before slipping into a chair on the opposite side of the table. You watch as he greets people coming into the room, a bit confused as to why he's still standing by the door until he finally sees the face he's been looking for.

He's got some kind of wit, some charm. Can't deny it's pretty attractive.

And to your surprise, he plops down in the seat next to you, followed by one of his team members [the said face he'd been looking for] you assume.

"Hope you don't mind."

"No, not at all." He gives you another toothless smile before eyeing your badge.

"Nice to meet you, Y/N." He puts out a hand for you to shake. "Yunho."

"Nice to meet you as well, Yunho." You shyly respond. "At least I don't have to call you the guy I almost spilled all my coffee on anymore."

"Yeah, no." He laughs. "This is Taehyun, my team lead. Taehyun, Y/N." You and Taehyun give each other small, curt bows just as the higher ups step in and settle at the front of the room.

"Hey everyone! Thanks for meeting. I know everyone is super busy so it's much appreciated." Yoori says as she flips her laptop open and pulls up the agenda slide on the powerpoint presentation. The meeting kicks off with small introductions around the table since a lot of people hadn't worked together like this, especially you and a select others mainly supporting pediatrics. When Yunho introduces himself, you find yourself enjoying the way he speaks. He's got a deep tone, but nothing off-putting. He speaks lightly and positively, chuckling in between statements.

Yeah, he's def got a witty charm to him.

When it's your turn to speak, you can feel Yunho's eyes from the side. He's paying attention and listening closely even if these are quick introductions to the team. He notices the way you shyly smile at those around you, still managing to speak clearly and concisely despite your nervousness that's physically manifesting in the way that your hands tug on the material of your jeans, fiddling with your fingers underneath the table in between the conversation.

Cute.

Then, after the light, airy introduction portion, the presentation gets a lot more technical, and you find that you're actually more involved in this than you expected. You're being asked to oversee the development of the clinical trial room in the pediatric wing, along with scheduling biweekly meetings to discuss updates. Making sure all required attendees are at the meetings and driving things forward. Coordinating across calendars, providing updates every step of the way.

And things seem to be picking up, moving real fast. Things were stalled and slow just a few months ago; now, it's all gas, no brakes.

When it comes to dealing with the ordering structure and IT developments, Yunho takes the lead and discusses the current updates and how they're still figuring out a few tweaks. Yoori is diligently taking notes on her own laptop, along with everyone else who is clarifying through questions of their own.

"Y/N, can you please work with Yunho and his team and the clinical informatics team to make sure the patient ordering enhancements will be taken care of and pushed through? Along with securing the data storage and network? I'll send you the list of required attendees that need to be at each meeting to help push these efforts forward. Let's prioritize this and try to get that done within the next week." You nod, glancing over to Yunho afterwards. He's got his chin resting on the palm of his hand and his eyes dart down to you. His brows perk up before he gives you a tiny, toothless smile. You feel your hands get sweaty from the look alone, so you divert your attention back to your laptop— typing up the rest of your notes on the side. Yunho can't help but glance over at your incredibly organized notes and the way your emails are categorized; all the folders within folders.

Never-ending folders.

Definitely Type A.

He does like that, though. Can't help but feel a little endeared by it.

As the hour long meeting progresses, you feel yourself getting slightly overwhelmed by your growing task list. You can't help but feel an itch to get to your desk to scribble in your planner and get your thoughts organized.

And as soon as the meeting ends, you cut out with quick goodbyes before rushing over to your office. Yunho was hoping to catch you afterwards to talk a little more, but he watches as you leave, the opportunity now a long gone thought.

"Where'd you go?" Sian, your other good friend, asks. She's in the finance department, and typically comes over to check in with you and Noeul, especially when she has to drop off some mail for the peds hospital. "You and Noeul were both gone."

"I had that meeting, remember?"

"Oh shit, yeah. How'd it go?"

"I don't know." You plop onto your desk and let out a huff, pulling your planner from your bag before pulling up your notes in the cloud on your desktop computer. "So many things to do and everything feels so urgent." You've already got a few people to meet, along with pushing the operational aspect of this huge project. You've got your hands tied.

"Wow, they're moving fast with this."

"Yeah, very." You shake your head as you write out your thoughts, suddenly pausing to look back up at her as she fiddles with the figurines on your desk. "Hey, do you know the IT managers well?"

"Most of them, yeah."

"Do you know Yunho?"

"Jeong Yunho?" You shrug since you didn't really catch his badge on him. "He's the only Yunho I know of. How could you not know him?"

"Girl, I'm mostly on the peds side, I rarely come to that end." You giggle.

"He's handsome as hell. Tall. Super nice and helpful. Him and his team are so good about coming to the rescue ASAP." Sian nudges you and wiggles her eyebrow. "He's a single dad. I believe his daughter is 10? 11? Probably 11."

"Mm, dad of a pre-teen girl."

"Hey. He's making it." Sian shrugs. "Heard he's a really good father despite losing his wife years ago. I'm sure it must have been incredibly hard." You nod.

"Yeah, I can only imagine."

"He's good friends with Park Seonghwa from marketing. I think they're besties or something." You nod.

"I only know Seonghwa from the one interview I did with him when we did the remodeling project at the peds oncology unit. After that, barely have spoken a word to him."

"He's a little hottie, too. But, I heard he's got a thing going on with Yoori."

"Yoori? Like.. Director Yoori?" Sian nods.

"They're so weird about it, though. Definitely not known publicly, but people have seen them out together a select few times. Or, seeing Seonghwa go to her house."

"Nosey." You laugh.

"Well, it's definitely a small world around here."

"Hm." You hum. "So interesting, especially after I just saw her. I would have never suspected."

"What about Yunho, though?"

"First, I almost spilled my coffee on him this morning." Sian nods.

"Why am I not surprised?"

"I'm not that clumsy."

"Mmkay." Sian laughs. "How much coffee?"

"A few drops." You make a face. "And then he ended up being in the meeting and sitting right next to me."

"See, big hospital but small world." You chuckle.

"Feels like college."

"Yeah."

"Speaking of Yunho." You furrow your brows when you see a little notification pop up in your Slack app.

yunho: hey!

you: hi there! you found me!

yunho: 😀 sorry, i tried to catch you after the meeting but you rushed out.

you: oops, yeah. i just had a few things to catch up on.

yunho: all good! do you wanna schedule some time to meet before scheduling the wider meeting with everyone else? i can walk you through everything so we're on the same page.

you: sure, yeah! that'd be helpful. i'm pretty free next week. i just prefer not to schedule anything over lunch if it can be helped. 😅

yunho: i'm the same, don't trip. lol. i'll send you an invite for early next week. what time do you get in usually?

you: mm, around 7:30-8am.

yunho: hm, wanna do 10am on monday then?

you: good with me. ☺️ thank you, yunho!

yunho: sure thing!

"Aw, he even went out of his way to message you." Sian watches you exchange messages from behind.

"Girl, please? We need to talk about getting the patient ordering system together and fixing all the infrastructure for the peds unit."

"Sounds like you'll be working with him closely? I'm actually kinda surprised his team is on this. Not saying they aren't great, but they're a bit smaller and support other departments." Sian ponders for a bit. "The other IT teams are pretty swamped though, now that I think about it. They probably have the best bandwidth right now."

"Who knows. But, yeah. I guess so. His team lead was also there."

"Maybe you'll get close to Yunho."

"Maybe I won't and just get my job done while minding my own business."

"Y/N. You're single and he's single, don't be so quick to cut him off just because he has a kid. You should put yourself out there again." She teases and you roll your eyes.

"Get out." She snorts. You hate that she's a little right about it; it had been awhile since you were in a serious relationship. You might've messed around with an old college classmate a few times, but it was so casual it ended up fizzling out all by itself and that was that. It's not like you had any bad relationships, either. They just weren't a fit, but you didn't hold any bad blood towards each other. Your mom was tired of it, though. She was hoping you'd finally stay in a serious, committed relationship— one where you'd end up walking down the aisle, settling down in a nice family home, one or two little ones running around [or more, she wouldn't be mad about it]. Maybe that's why you also dread visiting home, because she never fails to remind you that she's waiting, and that time doesn't wait for anyone. She gives Wonwoo a piece of it, too.

Just not as much as you.

It's always this game of comparison, trying to one-up her friends in some fashion. It's frustrating to deal with. She didn't understand that you were good with where you were at. And even if you did long for a partner and affection in that sense, it's not like you could wish for it to happen and change your life overnight. These things take time. These things need to develop naturally, wholeheartedly, genuinely;

It wasn't your time yet, you guess.

"Anyway, are we still having our little girls night at your place tomorrow?"

"Mhm. Just gotta visit my parents first then I'm all yours."

"Ah." She nods. "Is your brother coming along?"

"Nope. Next weekend, though."

"Goodluck, sweets. Tell us all about it when we come over." Sian looks at her watch. "I was gonna try to wait for Noeul, but I guess she got caught up in some things. I should head back." You nod. "See you tomorrow, my love."

"See you." She smiles before giving your shoulder a gentle squeeze and turning on her heel to take her walk back over to the main hospital.

As the afternoon rushes by, you're able to dock off a few more things on your list before feeling satisfied enough to call it a day. You decide you're a little too tired and worn out to be driving elsewhere for food, so you'll pop into the main hospital cafeteria.

wonwoo: did you spill your coffee on anyone else today?

you: no 🫥

wonwoo: [sends money]

wonwoo: go get a massage or something dude, relax

you: are you serious?!

wonwoo: yeah. 🙄 got a lil bonus from work, so if i'm eatin, you eatin too i guess.....

you: best brother award 😭

wonwoo: u don't mean it

you: i do!!! ily!!! 💕 i'll never call you bighead again!

wonwoo: yeah u def don't mean it

You giggle to yourself, feeling comforted by your brother even at a distance. The thing about your relationship with Wonwoo is that you two were always sharing in each other's ups and downs— good days, bad days. There was never any competition or need to feel like one had to do better than the other, thankfully; and this was a prime example of how close you and your brother were. You truly can't wait to hang out with him next week. You adore him to bits.

As you head back to the main hospital to grab food for dinner before leaving for the day [you definitely prefer the food there], you catch Yunho speaking to one of the nurses on her way out. She's blushing, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear while she laughs. Yunho looks nervous, but he's keeping himself pretty composed by the way he's smiling and laughing along with her. You brush past them quickly, and you aren't sure if Yunho noticed you or not— not like it matters, anyway.

He was definitely asking her out. And by the looks of it, she said yes. She had been wanting to say yes for awhile.

Welp, there goes the really cute guy you spilled coffee on.

It wasn't your time yet, you guess.

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seospicybin · 2 years ago

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VIEWFINDER.

PART II

Seungmin x reader x Lee Know. (s,a)

Chapters: Part I

Synopsis: An accidental reunion sets the sparks fly between you and Seungmin, but the relationship takes a turn at the end of the summer and you seek help from your frenemy, Minho. (20,2k words)

Author's note: Contains angst and 2min fighting for you. Enjoy!

📼 Viewfinder playlist.

Summer break has ended and the first time you're dreading it. You are usually excited to go back. You always come with new goals and study plans, starting all over with a refreshed spirit after the long break.

Rina is strangely quiet about you not coming home for days until one day before the summer break ends. When you came home yesterday, she only looked at you for a moment then eyeing the food you brought.

Food is the best option to solve problems and cure heartbreak. She seems to have moved on though or she's covering it well with her usual bright smile and glossy lips.

"Can't wait to go back to university life," she says with sheer sarcasm, throwing her bag onto the sofa.

"Yeah," you half-heartedly respond while pouring coffee into her favorite mug.

"That's weird," she says, folding her legs on the sofa and taking her mug of coffee from you, "You usually would give a speech about how excited I should be."

You dryly laugh and sit on the armrest of the sofa. It feels awkward being with her after living with Seungmin for weeks, you have to keep reminding yourself to be careful around her.

"So... how are you?" You ask, followed by a sip of coffee.

"Feeling like shit actually," she bluntly answers.

So she hasn't fully recovered yet from the break-up, and you feel bad for your absence at such dire times.

"I'm sorry for not being here," you sincerely apologize.

She waves you off and swallows her coffee, "You're spending time with someone and you seem happy so who am I to stop you?"

That puts some weight off your chest and you feel at ease after hearing that.

"Although, I'm disappointed that you haven't introduced him to me yet," she says, narrowing her eyes at you.

You close your eyes as guilt paints over your face, "Promise, I'll make time and introduce him to you."

"Okay, good!" Rina simply responds and starts checking her phone as it rapidly dings with new notifications.

You check the time and it's time to go, you have to ride a bicycle to campus so time management is crucial for you.

"I have class at 8," you announce as you put your coffee mug into the sink and quickly grab your bag from your bedroom, "Bye, Rina!"

You're riding your bicycle while enjoying the warm sunlight when another bicycle almost crashes at you, forcing you to brake and almost sending you to crash.

"It's too early for this, Minho!" You groan in complaint.

"I'm surprised you didn't dress like a biker chick with a leather jacket and spiked boots," he jokingly says, taking a jab at you.

"I'm surprised that you didn't ride a motorcycle yourself."

Minho likes to think that he's that intimidating, well, he could be at times but you're never scared of him. You give him the side eyes and notice that he changes his hair color into soft brown which softens his sharp facial features.

You laugh and click your tongue at him, "I'm not aware that robot gets jealous. They must have updated your software while I was away."

"Me? Jealous?" He innocently asks.

"Buy a motorcycle and grow up, Minho!" You say while paddling towards the gate of the campus, leaving him behind you to not let him drag your spirit down when you need it the most.

Summer hasn't completely left yet and you want to soak as much sun as you can before the weather turns colder but you hope you stay warm inside no matter the season.

The time isn't right.

When you have time, Seungmin is busy working and when he has time, you're busy studying. This is why you hate being away from him, your heart aches and is heavy with longing for him. The only way to solve it is by making time. You dash out of the room the second the last class ends and bicycle your way back to the apartment to the point that your legs burning.

Thank God, Rina isn't home yet or she'll ask you a ton of questions before letting you walk out of the door. Remembering how much Seungmin likes seeing you in a dress, you borrow one from Rina's closet and call a taxi to get you to his apartment.

Since Seungmin sometimes uses his apartment as a workplace, he keeps the door unlocked at all times and you push the door with your shoulder while carrying the food you bought on the way with the plan of having dinner with him.

There is no one inside and it's not like you have any other options, you put the bags of food on the kitchen island and grab yourself a glass of water. As you're about to pour yourself another glass of water, the door swings open and Seungmin comes through the door, his hair is disheveled and you guess it's from wearing a helmet.

"Hi," you quickly greet him but keep a space to not creep him out.

"Hey," he says, looking slightly taken aback and you're sure it's because you came without telling him.

"I'm sorry I came without telling you," you say because it's always safe to apologize first.

"I just—"

Now that he has acknowledged your presence and you're not creeping him up for coming unannounced, you walk up to him and kiss him. A kiss that slowly revives you and brings you back to life, God knows you needed it so badly. You gasp when you let go of the kiss, "I just miss you so much."

Seeing his face and not kissing him is impossible, you allow yourself to kiss him again, a little longer than the first one.

"Okay, I'm— I brought us food and we can have dinner together. It's you..." your word trails off as someone appears behind him, a girl with a model body and beautiful long, blonde hair.

"Oh, you have a guest!" You wildly assume, trying to fill in the awkward silence that passes between the three of you.

Seungmin turns to look at her and says, "Can you wait in the studio?"

"Sure," she answers, carrying her purse with her in the direction of the studio with a big sliding door that separates it from his private space.

He then looks at you and says, "Come with me!"

Science says that whenever you get a bad feeling, it's actually anxiety, and as much as you hate to admit it, it could be both.

You and Seungmin sit on the end of the bed, he's softly smiling at you as he fixes your hair. That usually works to soothe you but not now. Your hands are balled into fists on your lap and you just want to vomit all of your thoughts out.

"You're working tonight?"

"She's working with you?"

"It's okay if you are, I'll just go and—"

Oh God! It's happening, you're rambling. It's the anxiety-talking, not you. The only thing that stops you is your body turns against you and makes you choke on air midsentence.

"That is Yoora," he answers, "We worked together a few times and we've been hanging all afternoon."

It's the way he casually shares all that information with such ease that gets your nails digging into the inside of your hands.

"Hanging out, huh?" You almost lose your breath at the end of the sentence.

Seungmin places his hand on yours and calmly speaks, "Before I speak further, can you please keep your mind open? Can you do that for me?"

You nod as you feel your windpipe is closing in and making it harder for you to breathe.

"I like you very, very much," he begins.

"But I'm not used to conventional things. Social obligations and forced conversations. Saying no to all the things I want to say yes to," he shakes his head in despise of those things.

Your mind is scrambled to even try to stick with one thought or any thought for that matter.

"And that includes dating."

No matter what he's trying to say, it seems like the only conclusion you make in your head is that he wants to stop dating you.

"Do you want to break up with me?" You croak.

"No, no," he quickly denies.

Seungmin quietly inhales air and licks his lips before speaking, "I want to keep dating you but I want our relationship to be an open one."

You can't force your brain to work with the lack of oxygen and anxiety taking over, "What do you mean?"

"We're dating each other but at the same time, we're free to see someone else," he explains.

Yes, you do know what an open relationship is but what you're questioning is how calm he is about this. This is how far you let your mind open yet you still have a hard time processing it.

"Look, I'll understand if you don't want to do this but I want to give this a shot. We have the—"

You hold your hand up to stop him talking and take your hands from under him, "Give me a minute!"

Turning your head the other way and look out the window to see your reflection against the dark of the night sky yet you still can't make sense of everything. You look at him and force yourself to smile, "I need time to think."

"Okay," he says with a nod.

You get up from the bed and wipe your clammy hands on the hem of your dress which reminds you of how you made the time to come here only to receive a shocking revelation. Seungmin is trailing behind you as you take your jacket and purse from the sofa. You walk in the direction of the door and see that the blonde girl is unpacking the food you brought.

"Can I eat this?" She asks, not sure if she's asking you or Seungmin.

You glance at Seungmin and then at her, "Yes, you can have it. Please, don't let it go to waste," you say with an edge to your voice.

After what he asked of you, you can't bring yourself to look at him and not feel bitter about it. Maybe it's your fault for thinking you're that special to him.

Seungmin blocks you from getting to the door, "Hey, I hope you know that I meant it when I said I like you," he says.

Well, that only makes you guess how many times he has said that or more importantly, how many girls. He puts his hand under your chin and forces you to look at him.

"You're not like the other girls I know. We were married once," Seungmin tries to be playful but it falls short on your end.

You put on a weak smile for him as you stare into his eyes, hoping he can see how devastated he makes you feel right now.

"Can I kiss you?"

You wonder if his kisses would either heal or break you apart so you nod.

Seungmin caresses your cheek and tells you the answer with a soft kiss on your lips. You look down the second your lips parted and tell yourself that maybe you shouldn't have been curious. That's just you, blessed with inquisitiveness. You read books because you want to know and the more you know the less afraid you would be when faced with a strange situation like this.

However, for the first time in your life, you don't want to know the answer to this.

The plan is to stop thinking about Seungmin.

However, the more you try to distract yourself from it, the more you think of him. He's not only invading your head, he's overriding your life altogether. You're hardly studying, you can't sleep, you lost your appetite, you come home only to wallow more in your room. It's been like that for a week.

Also a week without Seungmin calling or texting you, it's like the whole summer has gone away with the season.

When the professor announces that there'll be a quiz today, you're not confident you'll get a good score. Somehow, you let your discouraging thoughts manifest into reality. As you stare at the score written in red ink, you can't even be mad about it. It seems like you're going to keep spiraling down from here.

"Am I dreaming or I saw you got a C minus?" Minho says, peeking at your graded paper from behind you.

You crumple it in your hand and angrily shove it into your bag, not answering him. You're stomping your way out of the class to get away from everyone, and can't wait to go home to be by yourself again.

Your hand is rummaging inside your bag, looking for the key to the chain lock and almost having a breakdown for couldn't find it quick enough to avoid Minho.

"Congratulations Minho, you're smarter than me," you quickly say to him because that seems to be what he seeks from you, a validation that he finally gets ahead of you.

You put your bag into the basket with a loud thud and bend down to unlock the bike from the rack in silence.

"Drinks then? It's on me," Minho offers, standing with one hand on the handlebar of his bike.

"No, thanks," you answer without thinking then.

Minho shifts his weight to one side and slings his backpack on one shoulder, "Hey, are you okay?"

"How am I doing has nothing to do with the reason why I don't want to drink with you. I just don't have time for your self-centered, snobby remarks," you tell him, a little too harsh to be honest.

This is why you need to get away from people, you don't want to lash out at them. The words are out of your mouth, the damage has been done and all you need to do is leave.

You back your bicycle out of the rack but Minho quickly grabs you by the elbow, stopping you before another cycler crashes into you.

"HEY! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WALK YOUR BIKE OUT BEFORE RIDING IT!" Minho scolds him even though he keeps riding away, unbothered.

He turns to look at you and asks again with his hand on your shoulder, "Are you really okay?"

You don't know why he chooses right now to be nice to you, you shrug his hand away from you and leave his question unanswered.

The heat that usually clung to the air has been replaced with a cool one, you're riding your bike with your eyes staying on the road and your mind wandering away from your body. It's muscle memory that helps you to keep paddling your way home without you having to order your brain to do it so and your reflex is still working when you make a quick turn to avoid two people carrying a big box across the street and in the process, you lost your balance and fall to the side, then onto the sidewalk.

You don't feel anything even after you arrive home and only notice a bruise on your ribcage when you change your clothes.

"Oh, God! That's a nasty bruise," Rina comments as she barges into the room without knocking like usual.

"I fell on my bike," you inform before she gets the wrong idea.

She takes a look at it and touches the skin, making you yelp in pain, "You should put ice on it," she says.

Rina wraps a few ice cubes in a thin towel, then sits next to you on the couch, slowly putting it on your bruised ribcage.

You hiss in pain while taking over the homemade ice pack from her, gently pressing on it, "Thank you!"

"Do not ride your bike for a while," she suggests, looking at you with worry.

You nod because there's no use fighting a losing fight.

Rina picks up her book and instead of reading it, she puts it on her lap. It seems like she has something else to say to you.

"Just say it..." you meekly allow her despite how blunt she can be.

She takes a breath and lets it out until both of her shoulders slumped, "Are you okay?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" You sigh and rest your head back.

Rina puts her book away and turns on the couch to face, "Because you've been acting not like yourself lately. You're always in your room, you're barely talking to me and you don't even care that there's an expired carton of milk in the fridge right now," she lists out all of the things that are way out of your pattern of behavior.

"You always care about everything and now... it's just like you've given up, completely," she sadly adds.

She inhales air and asks again with concerns filling her light brown eyes, "What happened?"

You're not ready to talk about Seungmin to Rina. Not only that you haven't introduced him yet to her but that also means, she will not get the whole picture of what truly happened between you and Seungmin.

"Is it because of the guy you're seeing?" She asks like she's seeing through your head.

Rina is quick-witted so it's no surprise that she knows right away that the source of this change of attitude is an external one. She scoots closer and puts her hand on your knee, "Did you guys break up?"

It's time for you to take a deep breath and carefully answer her, "No, it's... complicated."

"Oh, no," Rina reacts by closing her eyes and letting out a dramatic sigh, "Complicated means it's even worse than breaking up."

Hates it when she's always right but Rina has more experience in dating and romance which automatically makes her smarter than you.

"So what is it? Does he have a problem getting it up? Weird kinks? Oh!" She suddenly gasps in surprise with both hands covering her mouth. She suddenly lowers her voice to say, "Are you pregnant?"

You groan in disgust and quickly deny, "No, it's not that."

Rina takes another guess at it and wipes her hands down her thighs, “Well if it has nothing to do with the sexual stuff then… commitment issue?”

Can’t tell if Rina is good at guessing or if all men have the same basic problem? But it’s taking you aback how spots on her guess is that you don’t know how to respond to it.

She raises her eyebrows at you knowing that she guessed it correctly, “Oh, it’s so classic,” she says with a smirk.

“It’s not exactly that but it’s around the commitment area,” you correct her.

Rina’s forehead wrinkled into a question. As she opens her mouth to say something, the doorbell rings. You both look at each other, trying to guess who’s behind that door because none of you ordering food or expecting a guest.

“I’ll get it,” Rina volunteers and walks to the door to open it.

You wait on the couch in anticipation, you don’t want to get your hopes up, but at the same time, your hopes are already flying higher than your expectation. You hear Rina chatting by the door before walking back inside.

“An attractive young man is looking for you,” Rina announces with a sly smile.

There’s someone behind her and as she walks closer, she steps aside to reveal the person walking behind her.

It’s him, the bruise that reminds you of your heartache, Seungmin.

After introducing him to Rina like she wanted, you take Seungmin to your bedroom to avoid Rina eavesdropping on your conversation and close the door behind you. You pull the chair from your study desk to slowly sit on it while Seungmin sits on the edge of the bed facing you. It wasn’t what you expected him to see when he walked in on you sitting on the couch, wounded.

“What happened?” He asks.

It’s not good to second-guess his intention but ever since that night, you keep wondering about the way he treated you. Was he being genuine? Was he faking it just to keep you wrapped around his little finger?

“Fell off my bike. It’s not a big deal,” you keep your answer short.

Seungmin seems to have expected this attitude coming from you and you believe it’s because he knows he deserves it. He sheepishly smiles and nods.

“At least, let me treat it for you,” he says.

You hug yourself to not let him see it, it’s already enough for him to see you’re hurting, “No, I’m alright now.”

He reaches for your hand and turns it to show you the scrape you have on the heel of your palm, “Let me take care of it for you.”

His hand is warm like the last time you hold it but you remember you shouldn’t have let him in and try to retract your hand from his, but his grip is strong. He takes the first-aid kit Rina brought to your room earlier.

Seungmin carefully dabs ointment on the scrape and then blows on it to soothe the pain. You hate to admit it but you long to share a moment like this with him and he’s so tender, so caring, he makes you feel like you’re the only one in the world. He’s still like a dream to you.

Once he safely covers your wound with a bandage, he holds your hand in his with his thumb softly rubbing on the back of your hand. He leans forward and looks at you, his eyes reminding you of summer days, bright and warm.

“I miss you,” his voice is as soft as the breeze slipping through the window.

You’re close to breaking but you put on a strong face, staring him right in the eyes, and say, “It doesn’t seem like that to me.”

Seungmin holds your gaze like you’re holding the galaxy in your eyes and trying to find out what’s lurking beyond the vast darkness. He takes your other hand and holds it on your lap as if it would help him find what he’s looking for.

“You didn’t call, you didn’t text,” your voice breaks at the end of the sentence and you can’t hold yourself together again.

“I can’t help but think that you don’t want me anymore.”

And right now, as he stares into your eyes, he’s seeing you wounded from the inside too.

“I just thought you need the space and time to think,” he tells you.

You break into tears and fall apart in front of him, there’s no use in hiding your pain anymore. You melt the moment he holds his arms out for you and into his welcoming embrace where it’s safe and comfortable, a haven.

“I miss you so much,” you admit and your heart shrinks in your chest.

Seungmin pulls you by the hands to let you sit on his lap and not waste time wrapping his arms around you so tightly, forgetting about the bruise you have.

“Ouch,” you shriek in pain and hurriedly put his hand away from where your bruise is.

“How about we lay down, mmh?” he suggests.

Oh, how you miss his scent! He smells of sunshine, leather, and fabric softener, he’s of everything that makes you think of the summer when he took you on trips on his motorcycle. Your eyes are closed as you drink in his scent while he lightly runs his fingertips down your arm.

Seungmin gently kisses your arm and looks at you, “Are you still awake?”

“Mmh,” you answer with your eyes closed.

Endearingly, he puts the strands of hair covering your face and puts it to the side, “I don’t know if you believe this kind of thing but I think fate brought us back together again.”

You open your eyes and his eyes are the first thing you see, “You think so?”

“I waited years to meet you again and I feel there’s something here,” he speaks while brushing away the hair covering your face.

Hearing him being honest and open makes you realize that you owe him for not listening to what he had to say that night. This time, you want to give him the chance to explain himself.

“It’s the first time in my life that I feel this deeply for someone and it’s you,” he says as he puts your hair to the side and holds it there.

"I want to do it right with you and that's why I chose to be honest with you," he adds.

You hold his gaze as he speaks his heart out against the quiet of your room and your hand intertwined with his in the space between your bodies.

“But I understand if you don’t want to give this a shot. I just want to let you know that… I really like you, I do.”

Maybe it is possible to be in a relationship as long as you mainly focus on his true feelings for you and that's the only truth you need.

Who knows that with time Seungmin will realize that you're the only one he needs?

"I like you," you say back to him.

Seungmin brings your hand close to his mouth to kiss you and you use the chance to softly brush his lips with your knuckle.

It's not going to be easy but all you need to do is be more understanding and open-minded, you believe you can do those things for the sake of this relationship, for the sake of you and him.

"And I think we should give it a chance," you give your final answer to him.

A smile rises on his beautiful face and he leans in to kiss you, a soft kiss that pieces you back together and makes you whole. A kiss that once broke your heart but now revives it back to life. A kiss that has found its magic back.

"Thank you," he murmurs and he leans in again to place a long peck on your lips.

Seungmin lends his arm for you to use as a pillow and you're more than happy to comply, snuggling close into his body and leaving no gap between your bodies.

He repeatedly runs his hair through your hair and then softly asks, "Sleepy?"

You hum your answer while tightening your arm around him while he angles your head to place a soft, lingering kiss on your lips.

"Goodnight," he says right after he pulls away from the kiss.

How are you going to sleep with the butterflies fluttering in your stomach?

It's painful to put clothes on with the darkening bruise on your ribcage.

You're doing your usual morning routine, shower, breakfast, and skipping reading the news to focus on making your coffee. You're nervous about it since Seungmin takes his coffee seriously. It's not going to be as good as his but you try your best to at least make good coffee. You get startles startled when he appears with his eyes still sleepy and fluffy bedhead.

"You didn't wake me up," he says, trudging his way to you.

"You sleep so well. I feel bad if I have to wake you up," you answer.

He stops to stand next to you and sleepily smiles, "Morning!"

"Morning!" You say back with a smile, "Coffee?"

"Yes, please!" He sweetly answers.

You're reaching up for the cabinet to get mugs and yelp in pain, forgetting about the bruised ribcage.

"I'll get it for you," Seungmin offers, getting the mugs easily without having to stand on his tiptoes like you always do.

"Thank you," you carefully fill the two mugs with hot, steaming coffee.

You look at him as he takes a small sip, anticipating his reaction to your coffee, "Is it good?"

He takes another sip before answering, "It's fine."

You let out a quiet sigh of relief and can finally sip your coffee.

"Does it still hurt?" He asks, leaning the side of his body against the kitchen island.

"Only when I lift my arms," you reply.

Seungmin doesn't hesitate to lift your blouse to take a look at your bruise, observing it without touching it because he knows it'll be painful for you.

"Put ice on it regularly," he suggests, slowly letting go of your blouse.

"Okay," you reply.

"Don't ride your bike for now," he adds.

"Yes," you respond with a smile.

Seungmin takes another sip with his hand lingers on your hips, "I'll take you to campus today."

"No, it's okay, you don't have to," you kindly refuse, holding your coffee mug with both hands while looking up at him.

"I'm not asking," he says with his eyes staring at you.

You can't help seeing his hair tousled and not try to brush it for him, you put your coffee away so you can fix his hair.

"I'll finish the coffee and use your bathroom," he says, closing his eyes as you brush his hair to the back with your fingers.

"Clean towel on the top of the rack," you inform.

"Then I'll take you to campus," he continues.

"Okay," you put your hands away to let him go.

Seungmin opens his eyes and finds yours immediately, "Maybe after I give you kisses too," he says while putting down his coffee mug.

You are not prepared when he presses his lips on yours. The first kiss is a long peck on your lips and after that, he repeatedly pecks on your lips, making you giggle. In your peripheral vision, the door of Rina's bedroom is open and she's just standing there watching Seungmin kissing you in the kitchen. She eventually interrupts by clearing her throat.

"Good morning!" She cheerily says.

Seungmin reluctantly stops kissing you but keeps his hand on your waist, "Morning!"

"Coffee!" You quickly grab a new mug for him and Seungmin is kind enough to get it for you.

"Excuse me, I have to use the bathroom," Seungmin says, leaving you and Rina alone in the kitchen.

Rina is staring at you with a wicked grin on her face as you're pouring her a cup of coffee, making you feel uneasy. She waits until the sound of the shower is turned on to start drilling you with questions.

"So, that's the summer guy?"

"Yes."

"He's the one with the commitment issue?"

"Ah... yes," you awkwardly answer.

"I see that the issue has been solved," she says with her glossy lips curling into a sly smile.

You stall by sipping your coffee, "uhm... yes."

"I bet it was with one hot makeup sex," she wildly guesses.

You almost choked on your coffee hearing that because that isn't what happened. Last night, the two of you did solve the issue together then fell asleep right afterwards.

"No," you strongly deny.

Runa bursts into laughter, "Oh, my God! Chill! I'm just glad you stopped looking depressed and unmotivated," she says.

She lifts her coffee mug close to her mouth and adds, "Also glad that I don't have to hire a contract killer to hunt down the person who broke your heart."

You laugh at her words and refill her mug with more coffee to show your gratitude. Rina may seem bold and flippant, but you know that she actually cares deeply for you.

Seungmin holds out his hand to help you hop onto the back of the motorcycle. The campus is not that far so he rides slowly, holding your hand that is resting on his waist to shove it into the pocket of his leather jacket.

Suddenly, you don't want this ride to end, you want to ditch everything and just go wherever he takes you even if it's to the end of the world. You reluctantly get off the bike when he pulls up at the gate of the campus, slowly taking off your helmet to stall the time.

He also takes his helmet off, ignoring how disheveled his hair looks but that only makes him more attractive and you hate that everyone else can see him.

"Have a great day!" he wishes with a bright smile that softens his facial features, making him look like a puppy.

You hand him the helmet and wish the same for him, "You too. Have a great day!"

He reaches for your waist and pulls you close, smiling as he presses a soft kiss on your lips. At that moment, you don't care where you are or if anybody is watching. He holds the side of your face after letting go of the kiss, "I'll call you later, mmh?"

"Okay," you answer with a shy smile.

Taking you by surprise, he kisses you again and triumphantly smiles when he pulls away, "I'm going."

"Be careful!"

He puts his helmet on and you frown because that means there'll be no more surprise kisses. He turns the engine on and rides with the wind that brings him back to you.

The promise you made to yourself is that you'll keep your mind open and be more understanding.

There's not much changing except that he calls you once in a while or sends you a text when he's in the middle of work. You appreciate the effort and that he's keeping you in his thoughts. Seungmin has been keeping you on read for hours now and you try to distract yourself by watching a movie with Rina, you even made a bowl of popcorn for you to snack on together.

"It's Friday night," Rina blurts out of the blue with the bowl of popcorn resting close to her chest.

"And tomorrow is Saturday, yes, the point is...?" You half-heartedly ask her back.

"You have a boyfriend now. Aren't you supposed to be out and show the world how in love you are?" She says without looking at you.

"He's working tonight," you lie because it's easier than giving her the chance to analyze your relationship.

She turns her head to look at you and puts the bowl of popcorn on her lap, "Tell him you're alone at home, and trust me, he'll come running!"

You scoff because you know it'll hardly work on him and he probably gets that kind of text already, but they're most likely from the other girls, not you.

Now that she gets you thinking of the other girls Seungmin is seeing, you get up from the couch and go into your room. As you lay on your bed staring at the ceiling, you think of Rina's trick, it may be fallible, yes but it's worth trying. Instead of texting him, you call him and will keep on calling him until he picks up.

"Hey," you sweetly greet him as soon as he picks up the phone.

"Hey," he says back and it's nice that you can hear enthusiasm in his voice.

"What are you doing? Are you done with work?"

"Yes, I've just finished it," he answers along with rustles on his end of the line.

"Oh, that's great. How about we get dinner together?" You spontaneously ask him.

"Right now?"

"Yes, right now," you answer even though you have had your dinner already.

He sighs into the phone and then says, "I promised Lea that I'll treat her to dinner after work."

Your smile fades in a second and close your eyes, feeling defeated, "Okay, then."

There's a pause before Seungmin says something, "How about—"

"I'll see you," you abruptly end the call.

The other day it was Jane, yesterday it was Mila, and tonight, it's Lea. Another day, another girl to be worried about.

You fling your phone until it lands on the other side of the bed and sighs, "I'll see you never more like."

The next day, you have enough of giving other girls the chance to be with him. You wake up early, put on your nicest dress you just bought online, and spend an hour styling your hair, leaving the apartment even before Rina wakes up from her sleep.

You stop by the bakery on the way and buy a few baked goods, you don't bother buying the coffee because he'll only drink coffee he made himself. Except that day, Seungmin tolerated your coffee because it's you who made it. You push the door of his apartment and let yourself in, smiling because he's already awake. He's in the middle of grinding his coffee.

"How many of your muses come over in the morning bearing breakfast?" You say, showing him the bag of food you bring with you.

"Good thing I always brew a pot of coffee," he says in response.

He walks up to you, taking the bag from your hand to put it on the dining table so he can hug you and properly kiss you. One kiss is all it takes to remind you that a part of him is dearly yours and no one can take that away from you. You hold him back and hold on to him, returning his kiss with the same passion.

"Morning," he says with his lips glistening wet from the kiss.

You smile looking into his warm brown eyes, "Morning!"

Seungmin continues making his coffee and it's better to give him the space to do his morning ritual, you use the chance to take a look into his studio. You can see the trace of his works from last night from the lights and the props are still there, his computer is already on and you wonder if he's been up all night working. You return to the kitchen with a cup of coffee already waiting for you and you pull a chair to sit next to him.

"Did you stay up all night working?" You ask in curiosity.

"Kind of," he answers.

You frown and suddenly regret for coming when he needs the time to rest, "I'm sorry for coming without telling you."

He shakes his head and takes out a piece of pastry out of the bag, "I should be the one apologizing for not replying to your texts and the call."

You wave him off, "It’s okay. I was stupid for asking when I knew you were busy."

The morning sun hits him right on the eyes, making them shine as he softly gazes at you, "I want to show you something!"

He takes you back into his studio where he pushes the button to automatically close the windows, making it completely dark with the only source of light coming from the computer screen.

"Please, wait!" He tells you as he operates the computer, pulling a file from so many folders stored on his computer.

It gives you the itch at how unorganized his computer filing is but you hold the urge to say something. You look away and patiently wait like he asked you.

Then the projection turns on and shows moving images on the wall, you can't see it at first but after a moment, you recognize that it's you. These are all the pictures he took of you when you first came here, also the ones he took after he first kissed you that night.

"Is that me?" You ask in disbelief.

The girl in the pictures is beautiful, bright, and happy, it's nothing like you've seen countless times in the mirror. Seungmin hugs you from the back and watches it together with you with his hands wrapped around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder.

"It's you," he assures you.

It's like seeing a side of you that you never knew you had but you believe it's because you were in love.

"What do you think?"

"It's beautiful," you delightfully sigh.

"You are beautiful," he says with a gentle kiss on your cheek.

You slightly turn your head to the side at him, "But it's also weird looking at myself, not that this is weird but seeing myself..." you look back at the projection and continue talking, "... like this."

He turns his head at you and says, "Well, you have to get used to this because you're my source of inspiration," he coyly says.

Seungmin must be oblivious to how much his words affect you. Your cheeks are heating and your heart is leaping, it means so much more that he said you're his source of inspiration. In that moment, you believe that it's possible to be his one and only, it takes time but you're willing to wait until he's ready.

You turn around to face him and look into his eyes, there are so many things you want to say to him but at the same time, you can't fathom them into words. You show it through a kiss instead, showing him how much he means to you by passionately kissing him and putting your hands around him to show that you don't want to let go.

Seungmin tightens his hold around you, one hand holding the nape of your neck so he can angle your head as he pleases so he can deepen the kiss and taste you more. He only lets go to let you catch a breath and capture your lips in a kiss again, harder and hungrier than before.

The sound of the door being slammed shut stops the kiss and you see through the doorway that someone is coming into the apartment.

"Am I early or...?" The girl asks.

Seungmin checks on his watch and says, "No. You're actually right on time."

He glances at you and introduces her to you, "This is Yoon. She models for me."

"Ah..." you lowly gasp and suddenly, you feel like you're getting in between them instead of the other way.

"I should go," you hurriedly walk out of the studio.

"No. Please, stay!" Seungmin says.

You grab your bag from the dining table and sling it on your shoulder, "I have something," you lie.

You're aware you have to sound believable when you lie, "I have to go shopping with Rina. She's waiting for me."

Seungmin is following you as you're walking to the door but you just want to get out of there quickly, "I'll call you later. Bye!"

You close the door behind you and never look back, but it seems like Seungmin doesn't bother to chase after you.

It's only ten in the morning, but you don't want to go home and risk being asked by Rina why you dressed so nicely on a Saturday morning. You stop by a grocery store and buy a loaf of bread, walking in the direction of the park to clear your head while feeding the ducks by the pond.

"Where are you going with a loaf of bread?" Someone asks.

You turn on your feet and see Minho, stopping on his bicycle to talk to you. You feel horrible for the way you treated him that day.

"To the park," you answer.

"And what are you going to do with the bread?" He asks, eyeing the bag of bread you're holding in one hand.

It's an embarrassing thing to admit but after what you did that day, you remind yourself to be better than shrugging him off.

"I'm going to feed the ducks by the pond," you admit.

Minho looks at you for a moment and nods, "I'll come with you."

He gets off his bicycle and decides to walk it as you both navigate your way through the park to the pond where a flock of ducks swimming by the pond.

"For you," Minho hands you a cup of coffee.

The coffee tastes bland compared to the coffee Seungmin made but you thank Minho nonetheless. You're ripping the bread into pieces before throwing it to the mother duck with her ducklings trailing behind her.

"So this is what you do on the weekend?" He asks.

Minho is wearing a knitted sweater that looks a size too big for him yet somehow it looks good on him. The royal blue color suits him well.

"Not really," you take another slice of bread to shred it into pieces, "I come here when I need to clear my head."

Minho cracks a laugh, "What could possibly piss you off this early in the morning?"

You shrug and toss a big chunk of bread to the other mother of duck.

"I assume it's a who, not a what," he says, then sips her coffee.

He then takes a slice of bread and helps you feed the duck as another flock gathers around you.

"That explains why you were upset that day," he says with a sly smile on his face.

Minho sees through you like you're a ply of tissue which instantly makes him more dangerous than Rina. Also, he is being polite when he says you're just 'upset' when he has the right to say you were such a bitch that day. You refrain from sharing more about how he can easily conclude with a few details and it reminds you to apologize.

"I want to say sorry for that day," you sincerely tell him.

One corner of his mouth curls into a lopsided smile, "It's alright."

It's the last slice of bread you're holding and before the ducks are asking for more, you walk away from the edge of the pond.

"Why are you walking so fast?" Minho asks while fumbling to collect the coffee cups to throw into the trash bin nearby.

"The ducks are going to chase us asking for more food," you turn from jogging to half-running.

The lunch is surprisingly delightful and you get to talk in a civil manner like normal people. Minho ends up paying for it since he pulls his credit card faster than you.

"Let's say we're even," he says.

He offers to give you a bike ride home again but with the previous experience and you've just had food in your stomach, you decide to switch the role this time.

"Only if I'm the one riding," you tell him, not wasting time to get on his bike.

He laughs at your idea, "Are you sure? I'm heavy."

The more he tries to underestimate you because you're a girl, the more challenged you are. You wave him off and tie your hair into a ponytail.

"Just hop on!"

Minho is right to underestimate you. You've been riding the same street for years and only realize now that a few of them are inclining.

"Are you sure you don't want to switch?" He asks from behind you.

You shake your head and pretend to be okay even though your legs are burning from paddling, "Nah. We're only a block away."

Minho silently laughs behind you, "Well, if you insist."

He is supposed to prevent himself from falling but it's the other way, he's holding you by the shoulders to keep you balanced.

"We're almost there!" He says, squeezing your shoulders with his hands.

You can see your apartment building and paddle the bike with the remaining strength you have, wanting to end this torture you put on yourself as fast as you can. It takes everything in you not to crash the bike and pass out on the pavement, you patiently wait for Minho to get off first, then park the bike next to the pole of a streetlight.

"Told you I'm heavy," Minho says.

You shake your head, still trying to play cool about it, "I haven't been cycling for a while so..." you can't even finish your sentence because your mouth is too busy catching your breath.

After a moment of Minho pretending to care for his bicycle when he's actually giving you time to compose yourself. When he deems that you're no longer panting, he turns around to look at you.

"I must say I'm impressed," he says.

Your hands are on your waist as you say, "Don't hold your breath, Minho."

He lowly chuckles and stops himself from continuing, "Now, we're even."

"That's fair," you nod in agreement.

You look at him and slyly smile, "I was lying when I said the ducks were going to chase us."

"I know," he casually says.

"Then why are you running with me?"

"Cause I wanted to," he simply answers.

It's hard to process that there's a part of him that is this easygoing and just so fun to be with. You can't stop laughing at how you only discovered this part of him at a random time and Minho can't help but laugh along with you.

As the hilarity subsidies with time, you take your bag and hold it in front of you, "Thank you for lunch!"

"You're welcome," he responds with a smile that you rarely see on him, warm and friendly.

He gets on his bike and looks at you, "I'll get going then."

"Be careful," you blurt and why would you say that when he always rides his bicycle everywhere, "I mean, yeah, be... careful!"

Minho only responds with a smile, then rides away.

When you come into the apartment, Rina is sitting on the window sill and you guess she saw everything. She looks at you after you lock the door behind you.

"And where have you been?" She asks with her sly smile on.

"Lunch with Minho," you simply answer, walking to the kitchen to get yourself a glass of water.

"Dressed like that?"

"I was..." You think of an alternative answer by taking a big gulp of water.

"Yeah," you decide to spare her the reason why you dressed so nicely.

"Now, that you have a boyfriend—"

You hold your hand up to stop her from talking, "Seungmin wouldn't be jealous, I can promise you that," you tell her because that's just the truth.

Seungmin is with a beautiful model named Yoon in his studio as you speak, he's not giving a damn about you going on lunch with a friend from campus.

"It's not that," Rina says.

You jerk your head away and take another gulp of water.

She walks up to you and stops behind the kitchen island, "You shouldn't lead him on."

"Can you not speak in riddles, Rina? Please?" You whine, still exhausted from giving a grown adult a ride on the bike.

"Minho likes you. You shouldn't lead him on," she makes it clear by emphasizing every word to you.

You snort and water almost comes out of your nose, "yeah, sure," you half-heartedly say, then laugh it off.

Rina follows you as you walk to your room then stops at the doorway, "Laugh and deny all you want but you know that it's true," she confidently says.

You smile at her because even if it's true, it wouldn't change a thing and Seungmin wouldn't mind with you seeing another man. But you're not going to do that, you're going to prove that you're the only one Seungmin needs.

Gone are the warm sunny days as autumn arrives with the change of the colors of the leaves. You put on your thin coat before going out of the class and on the way out of the building, Minho joins you while carrying his books in one arm.

"Have you read the email from Professor Lim?" He asks as he's descending the stairs next to you.

"What? Did I miss an assignment?" You ask back in panic and fumble to look for your phone from the pocket of your jeans.

"No, it's the invitation to his gathering," he answers.

You stop by the door and step aside, not wanting to block other people from passing by, "I don't think I'm invited," you hopelessly say.

Minho dramatically rolls his eyes at you, "You only failed one of his tests."

There it is! You open to check if it's really the invitation and indeed it is. Professor Lim only invited the brightest students in his class and knowing that your academic presence is a little declining due to personal issues, you can't lie but feel relieved that you're still considered as one.

"It's next Saturday," he says.

"Yes, I can see that," you tell him and continue walking down the stairs.

"So, who are you going to take?" He asks.

"Is it necessary to bring a plus one?" You ask with a raised eyebrow.

He shoves his hands into the pocket of his jeans, "You're not going to take your boyfriend?"

It's funny that when you hear the word boyfriend, you don't immediately think of Seungmin, he's your boyfriend but at the same time, he doesn't feel like one.

"I'll try to ask him but I'm not sure," you tell him.

You're heading to the gate since you haven't been able to ride your bike yet and Minho is following you instead of turning to the bike station.

"You didn’t ride your bike today?"

"Popped my tire yesterday and I haven't got time to take it to the shop," he replies.

Even with an extra layer of clothes you're wearing, the cold wind is slipping through you. You're rubbing your hands together to warm yourself.

"Want to get some coffee?" Minho asks.

Having a warm drink in a weather like this couldn't be more perfect, you excitedly nod at his suggestion, "Sounds nice, yeah, sure."

There's a coffee shop one block away from campus and you both exit the campus gate heading that way when a bike stops at the side of the street.

In one look, you know that it's Seungmin even though his head is hidden in a helmet. He lifts the visor and exposes his face, softly smiling at you.

You come up to him, "Seungmin? What are you doing?"

"I came to pick you up," he simply answers, then hands you a helmet.

"Come on!" He says, not asking but ordering you to get on the bike and doing it so confidently.

You remember that you were heading to get coffee with Minho, you turn to look at him while holding the helmet in front of you.

"I'm sorry but can we do coffee next time?" You ask with an apologetic smile.

Minho coyly smiles at you and shoves his hands deeper into his jeans pockets, "That's okay."

You wave bye at him before putting on the helmet and getting on the motorcycle. You feel a funny feeling seeing Minho watch as Seungmin takes you further away from him until he disappears from your sight.

Seungmin notices that you're slightly shivering from riding through the cold, autumn air. He holds your hands as the elevator is taking you to his floor. He looks at you with his body pushing you to one side of the elevator.

"You're freezing," he says.

"I'll be okay," you tell him.

He doesn't answer but unzips his leather jacket, putting your hands on each side of his waist next to keep them warm under his leather jacket, "Is it warm enough?"

You nod yet he proceeds to rub his hands up and down your arms. In this enclosed space, he's closing the gap between your bodies with each passing second. He can feel every breath you take and the pounding of your heart in this proximity.

"Better now?"

"Yes," you breathless reply.

His fingertips brush your cheek as they reach for your hair to tuck it behind your ear and you stifle a breath as he holds you there. The elevator chimes and interrupts the intense moment, he takes your hand to lead you to his apartment like you never went there before.

You understand why he seems giddy as he guides you further inside, he has prepared dinner for you with candles and everything.

"I just need to get the wine," he says, going to the kitchen to get it.

"We can order when we're here... why?" You're at a loss for words.

You get used to setting your expectations low so when he does a grand gesture like this, it's nothing like what you have in mind.

"I cooked the dinner," he informs.

"What? You cooked all of these?" You say in awe, looking up at him as he's filling your glass with wine and the aphrodisiac smell wafting around the room.

"Yeah," he says it like it's not a big deal.

He lights the candles on the center of the dining table, "It's a little cold now but I hope it suits your taste," he says.

It's the way he acts like he doesn't prepare all this for you that only elevates his attractiveness, Seungmin is one of a kind and it makes you want him more. His cooking suits your taste just right and it tastes as nice as the smile he's giving you the whole dinner. You feel content just from being able to have alone time with him.

"Are you working today?" You ask to make sure that no one is going to interrupt again.

"I finished early," he shortly answers.

You let out a low sigh of relief and sip your wine to wash the anxiety down your mouth. You can finally relax your shoulders and truly enjoy the moment with him.

"I have another surprise for you," he announces after wiping his mouth with a napkin.

Your heart skips a beat at the mention of surprise because it doesn't always mean good.

"Yeah?" You nervously ask.

He gets up from his chair and holds his hand out at you which you eagerly take. He takes you in the direction of his studio and slides open the door to reveal the surprise.

"Oh, my God!" You gasp.

Seungmin turned his studio into a private art exhibition where he decorated the room with white sheets hung all over the wall and images of you projected onto them.

You cringe the moment you recognize that it's you, "It's still weird seeing my own face."

"Why? You're beautiful," he says as if it's that obvious.

He leads you to the center of the room where you can see the videos he took of you playing on each side of the wall at the same time. They look like dreams from the past but in the best way, you like how it reminds you of those summer days when everything was much warmer, brighter, and less complicated.

You look down and see that he put a bed on the floor, "That's so presumptuous of you," you say as you sit down on the bed.

Seungmin is slyly smiling as he takes a seat next to you and props one hand against the bed, "Well, we don't have to do anything if you don't want to."

You turn your head to the side and get greeted by his stare, "But I want to do... anything," you say.

He's already gone as you catch his eyes staring at your lips, he looks into your eyes again to say, "That's even better."

Is it pathetic of you to say that you miss being touched by him? Well, Seungmin can see how you crumble at the faintest of his touch on you. If it wasn't a sudden invitation, you would have dressed so nicely and put on a nice pair of lingerie. From the way he looks at you with eyes wide and heavy with lust, you're thankful that the matching underwear you're wearing is flattering enough for him.

"So beautiful," he sighs with his knuckles rubbing the back of your thigh.

He leans down to kiss your neck and chest, pulling away to look at you then sighs, "So warm..."

Only using the tip of his fingers, he places fluttering touches across your chest and murmurs, "So soft..."

He then uses his mouth to make a trail of kisses down the front of your body, stopping when his lips meet the waistband of your underwear.

Seungmin doesn't hesitate to plant his nose on your clothed core and takes a sniff at it. His hand smoothly parts your leg open and keeps it open by curving his arm around it. Through the sheer fabric of your underwear, he traces the bundle of your nerves with his tongue, circling it until it's soaked with a mix of his saliva and your essence.

Impatient, he puts the underwear to the side so he can put his mouth on your wetness, lapping at it like a man with an endless thirst. Lying on the bed almost naked with his head between your legs, you bite a finger between your teeth to muffle your noises.

Seungmin knows how to make you feel good and when he thinks using his mouth is not enough, he adds his fingers to stimulate you more. Your back is arching, slowly pulsating your hips at his face and riding on his slender fingers that curl inside you, lowly moaning through your parted mouth.

"Oh, my..." you sigh with your hands now grasping the sheet under you.

Seungmin takes your hand and slips it in his hair, wanting you to tug at it. He dives deeper into your wetness, his tongue endlessly teasing your clit, and sucks on it hard that earned him a loud moan from you. As the knot tightens inside you, your legs start to press into his head but that doesn't stop him from pleasing you until you cum all over his mouth.

Seungmin drags his glistening wet mouth across your stomach and places kisses on each breast before placing his mouth on you, kissing you so deep that it takes your breath away. He leaves you gasping for air once he lets go of the kiss, going for your neck to plant kisses on the sensitive skin. His hand smoothly pulls your soaked underwear down your legs without you realizing.

You do the same by opening the buttons of his shirt, removing every piece of clothing so you can every inch of his warm skin and taut muscles.

"I dreamed of you fucking me every night," Seungmin whispers.

You giggle as his breath tickles your ear, "Do you want me to?"

He doesn't answer but turns over on the bed and you're lying on top of him, his hand glides down your spine and stops at the curve of your ass, squeezing the ample flesh there as he presses a long kiss on your lips.

Seungmin is underneath you yet you feel intimidated as you're straddling him on the bed, his eyes never straying away from yours even for a second. You begin by reaching for the clasp of your bra on your back and take it off, slowly letting it slide down your arms, then you see that his eyes are slightly faltering at the sight of your naked body sitting on top of him.

Instead of feeling shy, you get a boost of confidence from the way Seungmin admires your body with eyes that light up in fiery desire and hands that endlessly explore places that make you lustfully sigh. You put your hands on his chest and slowly, drag them down, you watch as he whimpers as your hands stop on his abdomen. Your eyes flick at his then down at his hardening member, wrapping your hand around him to slowly stroking it.

You can feel his cock pulsating with desire in your hand, so hard and so veiny, hot all over. The harder it gets, the harder you resist yourself, you take a position and angle his cock into your entrance, wetting the tip by rubbing it down your slit.

Slowly, you ease yourself down his length as a long, breathless moan falls out of your mouth, "Oh..."

You bite your lower lip, feeling overwhelmed by how good it feels to have him inside you and fill you perfectly. You whine as he is fully sheathed in your warm, velvety walls.

Seungmin grips your waist with nails that dig into the flesh. You throw all of your hair to one side and enjoy watching him struggling to calm himself down.

"Do I feel good?" You ask him.

He sucks air through his gritted teeth and closes his eyes for a moment to finally answer, "So fucking good."

Hearing that, you feel confident to continue and you start rolling your hips, back and forth, fucking him like he dreamed every night. Not enough from just watching you fucking him, Seungmin sits up so he can kiss you, putting his hands around you with his head buried between your breasts.

"Even better than my dreams," he says against your lips.

You smile and return his kisses with the same eagerness, feeling his cock engorged inside you as you clench around him. Finding yourself lost in the pleasure as well, you put your hands around his neck as support and change the pace, bouncing on his lap as everything intensifies.

Seungmin takes your breast into his mouth and sucks on it hard, making you tug at his hair at how painful yet delightful that is. He then uses his tongue to play with your nipple before letting it go, leaving your breast wet with his saliva. He looks up at you as his hands grip each side of your waist, "You keep clenching around me."

You cup his jaw and ask, "You want me to stop?"

He shakes his head, "No."

The room is quiet except for the sound of bodies and lips crashing against each other, breathless moans, and the rustles of the bedsheets that hardly cover the bed anymore. With his hand gripping the nape of your neck, he forces you to keep looking at him as you both are closing into your highs.

Your high-pitched moans clash with his low grunts the moment both of you reach your climax together. You collapse onto his shoulder while he holds you close with his arms tightly wrapped around you.

A few kisses later, he gently lays you down on the bed and slowly pulls out of you, his eyes widening seeing his cum dripping out of you. It surprises him how much he cum inside you yet he pushes his cock inside you again before laying down next to you. He kisses your lips and nestles his head in the crook of your neck.

"I feel weird now," you say.

"Why?"

"We had sex with me watching us," you say, pointing at the video playing on the walls.

"I think it's sexy," he disagrees, then kisses your lips.

He props a hand against the mattress to support his head and tenderly caresses your cheek with his knuckle, "Want to know something?"

"Yeah?"

He gives you a soft peck on your lips first before speaking, "I think that we are indeed fated to meet again."

You put your hand on his chest and thinking that it would help you tell if he's being honest, "You think so?"

His eyes filled with nothing but admiration and sincerity, softly staring into yours and making you vulnerable under him, "I think you're the one for me."

Is it a sign that he's ready to commit to you? That you'll be the one and only girl in his life? Or should you hold your breath longer?

"I like you so much," he confesses, then rests his head on your chest.

Nevertheless, you don't want to think about what's coming next. You want to focus on this euphoric feeling of hearing those words coming out of his mouth. With that, you set yourself free and float onto cloud nine.

No one knows what time is it because all you can see are videos of you playing on a loop on the walls. You turn to the side and see Seungmin's eyes are open for you don't know how long. He could've watched you sleeping for hours for all you know.

"What time is it?" You croak.

He kisses your shoulder and puts his hand across your chest, "To be honest, I don't know," he replies.

You sleepily chuckle and put your hand on his forearm, "Coffee?"

"Okay," he takes your request, then rolls over to hover above you, "I'll make coffee after a kiss."

A kiss turns into two then three kisses and the fourth kiss escalates things further. The next thing you know, you're fisting the sheet and being a moaning mess underneath him.

Despite the sex revives both of you more than caffeine does, Seungmin just can't start his day without making coffee. The smell is wafting around the room while you're observing his camera collection and pick up one he's lending you.

It's been a while since you haven't taken his pictures and it's just the perfect scene, he's putting on his serious face with his mouth slightly curled into an adorable pout. He glances in your direction at the sound of the camera shutters. You ignore his glare by taking more pictures of him dressed in a white t-shirt with his fluffy bedhead.

"Oh?!" You stop to check why it won't take another picture, slightly fearing that you might have accidentally broken his camera.

He takes it from you to look for the issue, "You run out of films," he simply points out.

Seungmin pours you a cup of coffee first before handling the camera, pulling open the drawer to get a tube for the film.

Before the smell of coffee makes you forget about what you planned to ask him, you look at him and ask, "My Professor is inviting me to his gathering next Saturday and I'm thinking of taking you as my plus one."

Seungmin carefully opens the back of the camera to extract the roll of film, "When is it again?"

"Next Saturday."

He unlocks his phone to check his calendar, "Sorry, I have an appointment that day," he says.

It's not like you expected him to agree to socialize with your Professor. Just a tad disappointed but you understand that he's busy.

"That's okay," you assure him with a smile.

He puts down his phone next to his cup of coffee and takes the tube of films with him, "I'll put this to develop later."

His phone still lights up when he leaves for the studio and you don't mean to be nosy, but it's sitting there so you drag it close enough to see his schedule.

Kayla. 8 pm. Hotel Seville. That's what is written on his schedule for next Saturday. Before he notices that you're snooping in, you lock the phone and put it back next to his coffee cup. He returns to the kitchen, placing a kiss on your cheek as he walks past you before sitting on his stool.

"That looks good on you," he says, eyeing the shirt you're wearing which is the same one he wore last night.

"Yeah, it's comfortable," you reply with a smile.

"You can have it."

"I was planning to steal it anyway," you jokingly say.

Maybe you were over your head to think that what he said is a sign or maybe it is a sign for you to take a deep, deep breath and prepare yourself to hold it in longer this time.

The silence lets you dive further into your head and bathe yourself into your thoughts. Deeper and deeper, you're slowly drowning yourself in it until someone pulls you out of the water, taking you back to the real world that is just as harsh and as cold.

"I know I'll find you here," Minho says.

You thinly smile at him and shut the book you're hardly reading, "What's up?"

Minho puts his backpack down on the floor and joins you to sit at the other end of the window sill, it's your favorite spot in the library, "Did you fail another test or do you always look this terrible?"

If your head wasn't so centered around Seungmin, you would have come with a funny retort. You can only scoff and act like it doesn't bother you, to be honest, the only thing that bothers you is Seungmin.

"So, who are you going to take tomorrow?" You ask to shift the topic and your mind altogether.

The gathering is tomorrow which reminds you of the preparation that is still at zero. You haven't found a dress to wear and worse is no one to go with.

Minho fixes the collar of his coat as he says, "I don't think anyone wants to go with me."

That's a lie. The truth is a lot of girls are dying to ask him out and one of them would be more than glad to go with him if they weren't intimidated by his indifferent attitude, his smart mouth that only speaks harsh truth, and a brain that matches the size of his ego. The safe bet is Minho thinks that no girl is worthy enough to go with him.

"How about you?" He asks back.

"I'm taking myself," you answer with a dry laugh.

Minho sharply inhales air through his teeth and shoves his hands into his coat pockets, "Why don't we go together?"

Does it mean you're worthy enough for him? And why does that make you feel somehow... flattered? You look at him in suspicion, trying to guess what he is actually thinking when he asks you that. You eventually give up reading his inscrutable expression.

"But why?"

"Why not?" He asks back instead of answering.

You awkwardly laugh as you put your books back into your bag. There are no written rules where you can't take another guest as your plus one and he's right, why not?

"Yeah, sure," you take on his offer, "I'll meet you there."

It's not like Seungmin is going to mind you're going with Minho.

With Rina's help, you found a black dress with an appropriate length to wear to the gathering. She also lends her dainty earrings and high heels to match with it. You hold on to your coat as the cold slowly seeps into you as you walk on the pavement leading to Professor Lim's house.

From afar, you can see that his house lights up brighter than the other house, and cars are parked along his side of the street. You're fifteen minutes early from the appointed time but intellectuals always come early if not punctual. You pick up the speed of your walking when you see Minho standing outside.

"Why are you here?" You ask.

"I'm invited."

You snort hearing his answer, "I mean, why you’re not inside?"

"I'm waiting for you," he answers, a curl of steam escaping his mouth, and tells you he must have been waiting long outside.

"It's cold. You can wait for me inside!" You scold, taking him by the elbow to climb the steps and knock on the door.

Not long after, someone opens the door and greets you, "Hello, I'm Kevin, I'm Professor Lim's husband."

His marital status shocks you more than knowing about his sexual preference and you take his hand for a handshake, "Nice to meet you!"

Minho takes his turn to shake his hand and Kevin is surprised by his cold hands, "It's cold outside. Come in! Come in!"

After taking off his coat, Minho helps you take off yours and does it carefully so as not to ruin your hair which Rina spent almost an hour to style.

"Thank you," you mutter as you turn around.

He freezes for a moment just looking at you before he can say something, "You look nice!"

You're not used to gentleman Minho who knows how to treat a girl. You look at him to give you an idea of what you should compliment on him.

"And you look... not bad," you praise.

Honestly, Minho looks dashing tonight. He wears a black suit and a crisp white shirt, the suit jacket perfectly suits him, showcasing the broadness of his shoulders and the dark slacks enhance the length of his legs.

It's a polite thing to do to greet the host of the gathering and thank him for the invitation. Professor Lim looks more lively tonight than he looks when he's in his class.

"Please write down your answer for the quiz tonight," He says.

Every guest has to write down their answer to the same question. You and Minho take a card each to write your answer and read the question above already written on it.

"The person you would most like to have dinner with real or imagined, living or dead is..."

You know the exact answer that would please Professor Lim since he talks a lot about his favorite writer.

"George Sand," you and Minho say in unison and break into laughter together.

You check everyone else's answer on the big crystal bowl and see that a few of them have written the same answer, it's either George Sand or her full real name just for added impression.

You decide to skip on writing your answer, "I'm going to get a drink."

Minho also ditches his card and follows you, finding the waiter who carries a tray of drinks around the room. He grabs two champagne flutes and hands one to you.

"I always wanted to see his book collection," you tell Minho.

He confoundedly shifts his eyes to the big shelf full of books behind you, "And those are not books?"

You take a small sip of your wine, "He has a study room upstairs and it's off-limit to guests," you lowly whisper.

Minho looks around and spots that the host is busy talking to a group of people and his husband is walking around making sure everyone is enjoying the food.

"Well... it's not exactly off-limits," he says, taking you by the hand and sneaking up the stairs as everyone else is busy socializing.

Professor Lim's study room is located on the third floor, it is supposed to be the attic but he turns it into a big study room and you guessed it correctly, that's where he keeps his dear books. Without turning on the lights, you use the flashlight on your phone to scan the titles of the books, they're well-preserved first editions.

"Oh!" Minho suddenly gasps from the other side of the room.

You turn around and find him cradling a bottle of brandy, it's half full and looks very expensive.

"Let's have a party on our own," he says with mischief written all over his face.

You usually steer yourself away from problems but you really don't want to go back downstairs and try to socialize, talking about intellectual stuff. You just want to dull your mind with alcohol. Minho pushes the window and takes the drink with him, leaving you with no choice but to follow him, hanging out by the roof of your Professor's house.

"Why are we drinking on the roof? It's cold and high, it's a disaster waiting to happen," you tell him.

He holds his hand out at you, "I brought the blanket from his chair," he says, showing you the plaid quilt blanket.

You sit next to him and resist looking down, "And about the height?"

He wraps you with the blanket, then puts his arm around you, "I'll keep you safe."

"Ugh!" You groan in disgust and shrug his hand away from your shoulder.

He laughs and uncaps the bottle of brandy, from the smell of it you can tell the alcohol percentage in it. He takes the first sip, then winces at the bitter aftertaste.

"We share the bottle?" You ask as you take the bottle from him.

"We can't use the glass and leave evidence, right?"

You sigh and reluctantly take a small sip of it, aware of how much alcohol it contains. You hurriedly hand it back to him.

"Let's be honest..." you say.

"Okay."

"What's your real answer?"

"Answer to what?"

"Professor Lim's quiz," you answer.

Minho takes a longer sip this time and prepares himself for the aftertaste, gasping once he swallows it down. He takes another moment to think of an answer.

"Tolstoy," he answers.

As expected, his answer would be one of the Russian writers. You take your turn to drink and hand it back to him quickly.

"You?"

"Since we're being honest, I'd say... Howl Pendragon," you say with a smile.

Minho gives you a judgemental look and sips the brandy without any expression whatsoever.

"We can have dinner on his moving castle and if I'm lucky, I get to meet Calcifer too," you defend your answer.

"Whatever," he comments, followed by a thick cloud of steam.

You decide to share the blanket with him, scooting closer to him and covering his back with it. You cling to the sleeve of his suit jacket and smile, "I have to hold on to something so I won't fall."

Now that the silence resides between you and him, you can see the view from the roof, mostly the university complex and the clock tower in the middle.

"If we were being honest..." Minho says, "My answer would be you."

You look at him and in this proximity, you can smell his alcohol-tinted breath, "You're drunk already."

"No... not really," he vaguely answers, then shrugs.

"Well, you can simply ask me to dinner," you tell him, "It's not like we never had dinner together before."

He gazes into your eyes and asks, "Then what about your boyfriend?"

"My boyfriend is... not really my boyfriend," you cryptically say.

"What does that mean?" He narrows his eyes at you.

You blame the alcohol for loosening you up and let your words unfiltered, "We're in an open relationship."

"So...?"

"So, he's seeing another girl as we speak," you continue.

"That's—"

"We'd better get back," you quickly end the conversation before he can dig more personal things out of you.

Drunk you is dangerous but drunk Minho is way more dangerous. You take the bottle of brandy from him, it's wise for the two of you to stop drinking. You cap the bottle and get up first, helping him walk back into the study room, then put the bottle back where it belongs.

Safely make it back downstairs undetected, you look at Minho and he looks fine, it looks as if he didn't drink a drop of alcohol.

"I need to eat something to soak the alcohol with," he excuses himself to leave your side.

Okay, maybe he is drunk yet you regret telling him about Seungmin and the open relationship thing.

In the middle of Professor Lim's reading the answer to his quiz, you decide to leave early and thank Kevin on the way out. As you collect your coat by yourself, Minho appears from behind you, taking his coat that hangs next to yours.

"Let me drive you home," he sounds as demanding as usual.

You chuckle at him, "On your bicycle?"

"No, I'm taking a car tonight," he says.

Minho isn't joking, he's driving a car tonight and you're sitting on the passenger's side, looking at his hands holding the steering wheel. This time, you conclude that it's not about how hard he grips the steering wheel, Minho simply has veiny arms and you remind yourself to look away before it gets creepy.

"The crab cakes helped you sober up, huh?" You joke.

"I stole a few slices of bread from Professor Lim's kitchen actually," he jokes back.

"Bread absorbs alcohol faster, noted."

The ride shouldn't last this long but at the same time, you don't want it to end. In this space and silence you're sharing with Minho, you feel inexplicably comfortable and safe.

"Do you have plans for winter break?" He asks.

"No."

"You're not going to your parents for holidays?" He glances at you for a second before looking straight ahead at the road.

"They're going out of the country to celebrate it with my sister and their in-law," you answer.

Minho doesn't respond but steadily taps the steering wheel with his fingers.

"What about you?"

He drops one hand and rests it on his thigh, "My parents live not too far away from the city so... you'll see me around."

"Oh, how lovely!" You meant to make it a snide comment, but you say it in a sweet tone.

Your apartment comes to sight and Minho slows the car down before pulling to the side of the street and stops the car altogether.

You unclasp the safety belt and hold your purse close to your chest, "Thank you for the lift home!"

Minho turns off the car engine, then turns his head to the side, "No problem."

Weirdly, you don't feel like getting out of the car, it's warm and quiet in here, and you're not ready to step out into the cold yet.

"Thank you for being my plus one," you add.

"Likewise," he says back.

Your cheeks are heating and you're blaming the car heater for it, not because Minho can't stop staring at you.

"I.. uh-" you lost your train of thought and quickly recover yourself, "I'll see you around."

You're about to push the car door open when he suddenly grabs your elbow. You put your hand away from the handle of the door and turn to face, "Yes?"

"Can I..." His words trail off and he swallows air instead of continuing his sentence.

You chuckle seeing him so confused and flustered all at once, "Are you still drunk?"

Minho lets out a chuckle, "Maybe."

"Want me to drive you home then?"

"Yeah," he playfully answers.

"To be honest, I am slightly drunk to drive a car," you answer, half-laughing.

In the space filled with both of your waves of laughter, your eyes meet and he's leaning in, closer and closer until his lips land on yours.

Minho glides his soft lips on yours, warm and wet, hot breath filling your mouth as you let him taste you more. His hand holds the side of your face with his thumb tenderly caressing your cheek. The kiss is everything you expect to feel when you kiss someone you like. Your heart is fluttering, you feel a tingle inside you and your chest is overflowed with warm feelings.

However, the kiss makes you realize something.

You pull away until Minho's hand slips away from your cheek.

"Goodnight, Minho," you sadly say.

Without looking at him, you step out of his car and into the cold that seeps into your bones, freezes your heart, and makes you numb.

Seungmin rarely calls you twice in an hour when he usually calls you at certain times just to keep you on your toes. You've been thinking out loud by the time you reel yourself back to reality, you notice you have two missed calls on your phone. You hit call back and he picks up right away on the second ring, that's also a rare occurrence.

"Hey, sorry, I was in the bathroom," you lie because it's easier.

You hear him sigh, then say, "I miss you."

That's another rare occurrence. He usually says those words after you say them first to him.

"Miss you too," you hate to admit but it's true.

"You sound unwell. Are you okay?" Seungmin asks with a concerned voice.

Even through your voice, he can sense something is going on with you. You lick your lips and lie again, "It's the cold weather."

He lowly gasps then says, "You better dressed warmly. I don't want you to get sick."

"Okay," you immediately comply but you can't find it in you to engage in a long conversation with him, "so, why did you call me?"

"I can't call my girlfriend because I miss her?" He sweetly says.

Seungmin knows how to make you weak on the knees and you hate that you always fall for his sweet words.

"So that's it? You miss me?" You play along with him.

He laughs and you also hate how your heart rattles at the sound of his crisp laugh, "I'm taking you to dinner tomorrow."

"Just the two of us?" You naively ask.

"No," he answers, "A director of a gallery invited me to their dinner party."

"Oh. How nice!" You hope he can't hear the fake enthusiasm in your voice.

"Also, I have something to tell you," he says.

"You can't tell me now?" You're not in the mood to play along anymore.

"I have to tell you in person," he replies.

"Okay," you get used to setting your expectations low for him and you keep it that way.

"It's something good," he assures you.

"I hope so," you reply.

He thinks you're being playful and chuckles at it, "I'll pick you up tomorrow."

"Okay."

"Stay warm and take care."

"Better be something I haven't seen before as well," you give in to the temptation of teasing him.

"Okay," he playfully copies you.

The next day, you start dressing for the dinner party, wearing a dress you borrowed from Rina while she's busy packing to go home for winter break.

"Want me to help you with your hair?" She offers.

"No, I can't make you miss your flight," you kindly refuse.

You don't put too much makeup on and brush your hair, securing it with bobby pins to keep it neat.

"My taxi is here!" Rina announces.

You run out of your room to bid her bye, "Sorry I can't help you with your suitcases!"

She hugs you but not too tight to not wrinkle the dress, "It's okay. I'll just roll them down the stairs."

You're watching from the window as she waves at you before getting into the taxi. You get back to getting ready, putting your stuff into your purse and Seungmin rings the doorbell right on time.

"Whoa!" He exclaims the second he sees you.

"Come in. I just need to put my shoes on," you inform.

"Wait, wait," he stops you from walking away and pulls you close, leaning in to kiss you.

With your hand on his chest, you gently push him away and say, "We're going to be late."

He ignores your words and kisses you, forcing you to lower your guard down to let himself in again. His kiss heals but also breaks, nothing in between.

"God, I miss you so much," he sighs as he pulls away from the kiss.

You smile at his words and drop your hands to the side, "I still have to get my shoes."

Relentless, he pecks your lips before letting you go. You get a pair of Rina's black heels to match your dress and put them on with one hand against the wall.

"Where's your roommate?" Seungmin asks.

"She's going home for the winter break," you answer and go to your bedroom to retrieve your purse.

"So, you'll be alone in here?"

"Why? Does it give you ideas?" You tease.

"A lot of ideas," he shortly replies and does not hesitate to kiss you again.

The make-out session you had on your couch is what caused you both to be late for the dinner party. You fix your make-up on the car ride and thankfully, they're in the middle of an appetizer when you arrive.

Seungmin introduces you to the one who invited him, "This is Kayla, the director of Rostam Gallery."

"Oh?" You exclaim a little too excitedly. This is the Kayla he met that night Seungmin was supposed to come with you to Professor Lim's gathering.

"It's nice to meet you and thank you for letting me join in," you tell her as you shake her hand.

"The more the merrier," she says, then leads you to the dining room where the other guests have seated around the big round table.

Seungmin gentlemanly pulls the chair for you and takes the seat next to you after, the waiters immediately serve appetizers for both of you even though everyone else is almost finished with theirs.

The lady sitting next to you keeps making remarks about the china and you eventually find out that she's a ceramic artist. You engage in a conversation with her while the rest of the guests are in a heated discussion about some post-modern art pieces.

Seungmin checks on you every once in a while to make sure you feel comfortable, he holds your hand under the table and smiles as he asks, "Okay?

You dab your mouth with a napkin and answer, "The food is delicious. Can't complain!"

The guy sitting next to him leaning forward on the table to take a good look at you, "Seungmin, are you keeping this beautiful lady away from me on purpose?" He says.

You politely smile at him and Seungmin leans back on his chair to introduce you to him, "This is Jim, a journalist."

Jim offers his hand for a handshake and you briefly shake it as you introduce yourself.

"She's my girlfriend," Seungmin adds at the end of the introduction.

Jim seems to be surprised hearing that and smiles at you, "You got yourself uh... a beautiful girlfriend, Seungmin!" He says in a mix of awe and shock.

Seungmin glances at you and smiles, "I know," he confidently responds.

The conversation at the table has changed into great works of Spanish artists and Seungmin is intently listening to everyone talking about it so passionately that he is not aware of his phone buzzing inside the inside pocket of his suit jacket.

You lean in close to let him know, "Seungmin, your phone is ringing."

He reaches inside to check his phone and decides to excuse himself to take the call. The waiter is done serving the dessert and you take your fork to start digging into the decadent-looking chocolate cake.

"I'm sorry about earlier," Jim says, leaning into Seungmin's seat.

You refrain from eating and put the fork down, "Sorry for what?"

"I didn't know that you're Seungmin's girlfriend," he answers.

It gives you the impression that Seungmin's way of dating is public knowledge. All these times, these people think that you're just one of Seungmin's "girl-friend" and not his actual girlfriend whom he's dating.

You manage to put on a smile and say, "That's alright."

"Oh, you must be happy about Seungmin," he shares without context.

"Pardon?"

"Oh, he hasn't told you about the exhibition he's going to hold abroad?"

You slightly shake your head, "No."

"When is the exhibition?" You hesitantly ask.

"Next month," Jim shortly answers.

That means Seungmin is going abroad for it and he doesn't tell you about it. It's embarrassing that he declares you as his girlfriend but you get to hear about him from someone else.

Seungmin returns to his seat at the right time but he seems to acknowledge the chat you had with him, "Jim, you're not trying to steal her from me, right?"

Jim snorts in response, "As if I had the chance against you!"

You return to your dessert and dig your fork at it, cutting a piece of it on the beautiful china. Before you take it into your mouth, you look around at the people sitting on the dining table and think that they're right, you're only his plus-one and nothing more.

As everyone getting too drunk from wine and the night is getting late, Seungmin decides that it's time to leave. You leave for the bathroom and come back to him talking to a girl who's sitting next to Jim. They look rather friendly and she kisses both of his cheeks before she goes back to the dining room.

Seungmin smiles when he notices you're coming his way, he has your coat and purse in his hand.

"Ready to go home?" He holds the coat and puts it on for you, fixing your hair afterward.

You grab the purse from him as you mutter your gratitude, "Yes."

The constant hum of the car heater is what you can hear on the whole car ride as you stare out the window with your head filled with so many thoughts you can't pick one and try to assess it.

Seungmin squeezes your hand and makes you turn your head at him, "You're so quiet."

You thinly smile and think of something to say, "Don't you say you have something you want to tell me?"

He quickly glances at you before looking straight ahead, "Yeah, but I'll tell you once we get home."

"Is it about the exhibition?" You don't mean to spoil it from him but you feel sick the longer you hold it to yourself.

He looks rather surprised that you know about it, "Yes and there's another thing," he says.

"That you will be leaving the country for it?"

He awkwardly smiles, "Yes, but—"

"How did you do it?" You cut him off.

"How did I do what?" He asks in confusion.

There's no going back once you let everything out of your chest but this is it, you're done trying to control your feelings when it's your right to feel angry about what he's doing to you.

You turn on your seat to face him and ask, "How did you kiss some other girls and not feel guilty about it?"

Seungmin decides to pull the car to the side of the road and stops the engine. He looks at you and asks again, "What is it? What is wrong?"

You're tired of swallowing things down and trying to understand when he doesn't even try to do the same for you, "I kissed another guy the other night," you confess.

"And I feel horrible... I feel so bad about it because it feels like I'm cheating on you," you croak with tears getting in between the words.

You shut your eyes tight for a moment to fight the tears from coming out of you but it's a fruitless effort, "What I'm asking is how did you do it? Kissing other girls and not feeling like you betrayed me?"

Seungmin's mouth is agape but no words coming out of it. There's only a sigh and eyes that stare back into your glassy eyes.

"How did you do it?" You raise your voice that it's echoing in the small space of his car. Even with your eyes blurry with tears, you can see that he has no answer to your question.

"You don't even seem to be mad about me kissing another guy."

Tears won't stop coming down your face and you feel a lump blocking you from talking.

You take a deep breath but all it does is make you feel aches inside, "Am I really your girlfriend? Do I mean something to you?"

For the first time in your life, you don't want to know the answer. You unclasp your safety belt, grab your purse, and get out of the car. The cold slaps you in the face with the harsh cold air and you hurriedly hailing your hand to get a taxi, wanting to get as far away from him as possible.

From your peripheral vision, you see Seungmin getting out of the car and is about to walk up to you when a taxi stops right in front of you. You immediately get yourself inside and tell the driver to drive, leaving a trail of pieces of broken your heart as you go.

You find yourself in front of Minho's apartment an hour later.

It's unclear why you decided to come here but deep down, you know why. It's been days since you both kissed and you haven't said anything to him about it.

Minho probably thinks you hate him or that the kiss was a wrong move on his part when the truth is... the kiss is what you needed to take you back into reality. You knock on his door and wait in anticipation, afraid that he's already leaving for the holidays. After a while, you hear footsteps and someone unlocks the door.

Minho opens the door just enough to show himself and he looks surprised to see you. You're not aware of how miserable you must have looked with your ruined makeup and red, puffy eyes.

"The kiss was right," you tell him before losing yourself in the sadness again.

He opens the door wider to let you in, "Hey, why don't you come—"

"The kiss was nice, the kiss was everything I hoped for and I realize that I do like you, Minho," you admit with a voice that quivers from the cold.

You lick your lips and look at him, "But I also hate it. The kiss... the kiss made me realize that I... I deserve better."

The lump in your throat appears again and it turns into a hot coal as you resist letting yourself cry again.

"That I deserve someone who treats me right, special... someone who doesn't make me feel insecure all the time, someone better, someone..."

Fresh tears roll down your cheeks again and it feels hot on your cheeks after walking a block in the cold.

"Someone like you," you finish your sentence.

You look at him against the hot tears that can't stop pooling in your eyes no matter how much you wipe them with the back of your hands, "But it feels like my heart is no longer a part of my body, I can't–I can't control it, Minho," you say in a frustrated tone.

You close your eyes because what you're about you say next is painful to admit, "I can't stop it. My heart wants him."

You break into sobs the moment Minho pulls you into his hug.

From hundreds of books you've read in your life, it's impossible to find the answers to this: If the heart is no longer part of your body then how can you still feel it aches inside your chest?

Seungmin knows that one night is enough time and space he gave you. He knows that if he lets it on too long, he'll lose you and he doesn't want that.

He hits the speed limit as he rides his bike to go to your place and knock on your door only to be answered by disappointment. He calls your phone but you don't pick up, he tries knocking on the door only to get disappointed again.

As a last effort, he hits the call button again and leans against the door of your apartment. He turns around and sees someone he knows, he has seen him with you before.

"You're her friend, aren't you?" Seungmin confidently guesses.

Minho stops at the top of the stairs and stays there, "Yes."

"She's not home. Do you have any ideas where she might be?" Seungmin asks, taking a step closer to him.

Even in this proximity, Seungmin can tell that he knows the answer but he can't decide whether to tell him or not.

"I'm not sure," Minho answers and he turns around to walk down the stairs.

It seems that he decided to do the third option and that is lying about his answer. Seungmin follows him down the stairs and tries to get an answer from him.

"I know that you know," Seungmin says from behind him.

"You're her boyfriend. You should know," Minho nonchalantly says while keeps walking down the stairs with hands shoved inside his coat pockets.

Seungmin sighs to calm himself down but asking him kindly is not working, so he tries another way, "And I know you're the guy she kissed."

Minho lands on the base of the stairs, takes another step, and turns around on his feet, "So? What are you going to do about it?"

Seungmin hates this brazen, flippant attitude and if there's one good thing about it, he knows that he is just a passing fancy for you.

"Nothing," he simply answers Minho's question.

Seungmin walks the rest of the steps and stops right in front of him, "Because I know she likes me better than you!"

Minho tilts his head to meet his stare and laughs, he licks his lips before talking right into his face, "But I treat her better than you."

That gets on Seungmin's nerves that he grabs fistfuls of Minho's sweater and pulls him close, "You know nothing. Your words mean nothing to me. Just tell me where she is!"

Minho takes his hands and puts them away from him, "You don't deserve her. Why would I tell you where she is so you can break her heart again and again?" He raises his voice louder than him.

The first one, he let it go but this is his second strike and he makes the third strike when Minho decides to leave him behind. Seungmin just can't allow this anymore, he chases him outside and pulls him by his coat.

In the next second, it turns into a childish fight of pushing and shoving each other, making a scene that the passerby can't ignore anymore. Minho lets go first and takes a few steps back away from Seungmin.

"If you want to play around and date as many girls as you want, just let her go! You don't deserve her!" Minho shouts at him.

Seungmin is going at him but a stranger holding him back by his arms, "You know nothing!"

Minho yanks his arms away from the people who broke away from their fight and comes up at Seungmin, "I know everything! She went to my place last night and told me everything!"

Minho lowers his voice to not let people hear what he's saying, "You know what? She's right about everything. You didn't even mad about me kissing her."

Seungmin's heart drops that Minho indeed knows about everything. He feels it now, the betrayal. This is how you must've felt last night.

"And you're about to leave her too, right? You're going out of the country, running away from commitment like you always do," Minho says with a snide smile.

"Fuck you!" Seungmin curses out of anger, "I'm not running away from her."

People are coming to break the fight again but Seungmin tells them to stay back. He calms himself down by taking a deep breath and looks at Minho again, "I'm taking her with me and I was about to ask her if she wants to go with me when she suddenly admitted to kissing you!"

Minho looks away and lets out a snarky laugh, "You think a vacation will fix everything?"

"No," Seungmin answers while daringly looking into his eyes, "but I planned on telling her that I'm ready to commit to her."

The smirk on Minho's face gradually fades and his jaws clenched, probably holding in the urge to go at him. But he knows he has no right to prevent him from seeing you.

Minho goes for his bike parked next to the bench and Seungmin hopelessly follows him, "So, please, tell me where I can find her!"

Minho unlocks his bike and walks it to the side of the road, he turns to look at him and considers whether to tell him or not.

It's like someone has punctured your lungs, no matter how much you breathe, you keep losing air. If anything, you find it hard to breathe.

You look down at the ducks swimming on the pond, munching on the pieces of bread you throw onto the pond and it's floating on the surface of water.

You feel jealous at how easy things are for them, they only have to follow the natural law of finding their mates and procreate. No rules, no games, no tricks, no complications, no heartache. It's as simple as that.

You throw the plastic bag into the trash bin and think of taking a walk around the park before heading back home. It's cold for a walk but it's better than wallowing things in your room, all alone.

White steam escapes your mouth as you let out a sigh and rub your hands together to keep them warm when you feel a hand grab you by the shoulder.

You look over your shoulder and see the last person you want to see, Seungmin.

"Why are you out in this cold?" He asks, taking his gloves off so he can put them on you.

You take your hands away and sadly tell him "It's too late for that, Seungmin."

He ignores your words and slips his glove into your hand, "I'll always care for you."

"And for other girls too, apparently," you add.

Seungmin holds your gloved hands in his and waits until you look him in the eyes before speaking, it takes a minute until you eventually trapped yourself in his gaze.

"You didn't let me talk last night," he says.

"That won't change a thing. I'll never understand you, what you want..." you tell him.

This time, you put on a tough face and even tougher heart, you have cried enough for him. You refuse to cry again for him.

"I'm not a stop along the way, Seungmin. I'm a destination. I want you for me and me only but if you want to keep going and see where it takes you, then I beg you to please let me go," you rest your case with a steadfast heart.

"You either stay or leave and I'm afraid this is your only chance to decide," you give him the ultimatum and turn the table back to him.

It feels lighter now that you have let everything out of you and both decisions would cost you pain but it's worth knowing the answer to this.

"Can I talk now?" Seungmin asks and you must admit that he puts on a different kind of serious expression than the one he makes whenever he's making coffee.

It's only fair that you listen to what he needs to say, so you nod and let him talk.

"Last night, I was going to tell you about the exhibition and that I'll be leaving soon to prepare it," he begins.

He fiercely looks into your eyes as he steadily holds your hands, "then you left before I got the chance to say about the things I really wanted to tell you."

You swallow air and feel a pang of guilt inside you. You did act selfishly last night, you can see it now after he pointed it out to you.

Seungmin takes something from the inner pocket of his leather jacket, flight tickets, two of them. He shows it to you and smiles, "I was about to ask you if you want to go with me."

He inhales air before continuing to talk, "I'll be working most of the time but I think of us spending Christmas and New Year together..." he pauses to sniff from the cold air, "And I can't think of spending it with anyone else but you."

He pits the tickets back into his leather jacket pocket and shifts his focus back on you again, "I know you must have been so confused with this open relationship thing but if you give me more time, I know I'll be more certain with my feelings."

He squeezes your hands to emphasize how much he means his words, "Give me one more chance to prove it to you, to show you that I want to stay."

It's so hard with his eyes softly gazing into your eyes and they're warm and earnest, he's so open and honest with you. But you can't find the answer in him, you have to look into your heart and ask it if it's still what it wants.

There's only one way to find out.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes, with pleasure," Seungmin replies with an enthusiastic smile.

You take a step closer and close the gap of your bodies. You lean in and kiss him, letting yourself immerse in it to get what you want.

This time, the kiss will neither heal nor break you. This time, the kiss will tell you the answer.

The last time Minho saw you, you were putting in your suitcase into the trunk of a taxi and that was when he told himself that it was time to wave the white flag.

Frankly, he admitted defeat when he told Seungmin where to find you, that you must be feeding the ducks by the pond and it seemed to be leading you to agree on going away with Seungmin for the holidays.

It's what your heart wants and Minho only helped you get it.

There's a week left in winter break but snow has just started piling on the pavement he walks on. Minho wraps himself in layers of clothes and shields himself from the cold by hugging himself while listening to the crunch of the snow as he steps on it.

The plan is to return some books he borrowed over the holidays and let the librarian lady take care of them as he browses for more books to borrow.

Something tells him that he needs to check somewhere where he knows that he'll only meet disappointment. Yet he follows his heart and lets it take him to where you usually would be.

Minho almost laughs because of how vivid the imagery is. He sees you there, sitting on the big window sill with your feet pulled up and your breath fogging the glass.

Wait... does Minho see what he wants to see or is it real? Either way, he thinks his eyes are playing tricks on him so he refuses to believe, turning around on his heels.

The sound of your voice calling his name shatters his doubts, "Minho?"

It takes him a moment to get himself together and turns around to answer your call, "Yes?"

Now that he sees your smile and it's aimed toward him, he no longer thinks his eyes are playing tricks. It is what it is, it's you, right there and he's walking towards that smile.

"I thought you're still on holiday," You say and hold your book close to your chest with your hand covering the front of the book, he can't see the title.

It should be him asking that question. Shouldn't you be in another country and spend the rest of the winter break with your boyfriend?

"You know me. I like seeing books more than seeing my family," he half-heartedly says with a sheepish smile.

"Roasting yourself, huh? That's new," you say with a low laugh.

The view outside the window of tree branches covered in the show makes a picturesque background as you put your feet down the window sill but all he sees is you.

"I haven't had breakfast," you suddenly share.

"Why not?" He asks back.

"I have nothing in my fridge so I only had coffee," you answer while looking up with eyes that shine for him, "Do you have anything in your fridge I can eat?"

It takes no genius that you're asking him to cook breakfast for you but it would be stupid of him to pass the chance.

"No," Minho answers, then hoists the strap of his bag higher on his shoulder, "But I can cook them for you."

It's almost noon to be considered a breakfast so Minho cooks lunch for two while you're playing with his cats on the carpeted floor.

"I'm fun when I'm sober, right?" You coo at the eldest of his three cats, softly scratching her belly with your fingers.

He silently watches from the kitchen as he prepares the table smiling without him realizing it. He snaps himself out of it and announces, "Lunch is ready!"

You get up from the floor and dash to the sink to wash your hands, pulling a chair from the dining table and sitting on it. You take a whiff of the steaming bowl of soup Minho cooked and hum in delight, "Whoa. Smells so good!"

Minho sits on his chair after getting a pitcher of water to the table and he sees that you're waiting for him to start eating, "Aren't you hungry?"

"Thank you for the food!" You say in gratitude and with that being said, you pick up your spoon to start eating.

Maybe it's the cold weather, maybe it's the hot soup that he's eating, but Minho feels warm, inside and out. He believes it's mostly because he's enjoying the company he's with who's heartily eating the food he cooked.

"I ate too much pie and cookies at Rina's," you share out of the blue.

"Rina's?" He asks with a puzzled look on his face.

You nod and put down your spoon to drink your water, "Where did you think I spent the holidays?"

That gets him thinking for a moment. What answer should he give you? An honest one where he thought you went away with your boyfriend and possibly admits that he got a little heartbroken about it or play it cool like he usually does?

"I saw you leaving with your suitcase so I thought..." he skips on finishing his sentence.

"Ah..." you take another sip of your water and put the glass down.

"Well, that was me going to the airport to crash Rina's family's Christmas," you sheepishly answer.

Minho doesn't know how to say it without getting his hopes up yet he dares himself to ask, "You didn't go with him?"

Your eyes are nowhere looking at him but he sees a sad, profound smile on your face, then you shake your head, "He may be what my heart wants but he's not what I need."

In that moment, something is filling his chest, something warm, something that makes him feel like he can finally breathe again. Minho is hopeful once again.

"For the record, I offered to help with the dishes," you tell him, placing a mug of coffee you made for him on the kitchen counter.

Minho dries his hands with a cloth before leaning against the kitchen counter next to you and sipping his coffee, watching his cat lying under the hazy sunlight coming through the window.

He steals glances at you and hesitates to ask how you're feeling about your unexpected decision, "How are you doing?"

You inhale the air before answering, "I'm doing better than I expected actually."

Minho doesn't even think about how things will be going from here but hearing that you're doing fine puts him at ease. He has so many things to say but it's wise for him to not rush things, he's certain that you still need time.

You turn your head to look at him and say, "I've just finished reading something this week and it surprised me how much I enjoyed it."

You have one hand on your chest while the other holding your coffee mug, "It's a play and there's this line that deeply resonates with me."

The way you stare into his eyes enchants him to stare back into yours, there's a space between your bodies but looking eyes to eyes like this makes him feel closer to you in a sense.

"It says... 'If ever my life can be of any use to you, come and claim it.'."

Minho recognizes the lines right away. It's from one of his favorite writers. He gets flustered and smiles, "You read Russian literature now, huh?"

"Yeah, guess I'll be as boring as you now," You softly laugh and put down your mug on the counter next to him.

"I think it's my time to leave," you put your hands on the edge of the counter and accidentally nudged him.

Minho doesn't want to let you go again so he holds you by the fingers and looks into your eyes. His mouth gets ahead of his brain when he blurts out, "Stay."

He holds more of your hand in his and brings himself closer to you. With eyes that look deeper into your eyes and a heart that knows what it wants, Minho says, "I want you to stay."

He sees the doubt and fears in your eyes, he would understand if you chose to leave, and for once in his life, it's okay for him to lose to you.

To his surprise, you hold his hand back and say, "Well, why don't you come and claim it?"

If Minho knew that all he had to do was to come and claim it, he would have done it sooner. But right now is not too late so he closes the gap between your bodies and puts his hand on the side of your face.

With such love, he cups your cheek and swipes his thumb across your lips which he dreamed of kissing a million times, asleep or awake. This is not a dream yet you still feel like one.

The moment your lips meet again, it thaws his heart and his worried mind. He pulls you close and puts his heart closer to yours, two hearts beating as one with mere flesh and bones in between.

You are of words that create a poem and the sentiment it has between the lines, you are the allusion in his written life in which Minho has now come and claimed.

Support my blog by kindly reblog, comment or tip me on my ko-fi!

taglist: @svintsandghosts @abiaswreck @septicrebel @cursed-mars-bars @ppiri-bahng @drhsthl @tangylemonade @bluenights1899 @thisisnotstraight88 @elizalabs3 @avyskai @is2cb97 @simeonswhore @marvelous-llama @linovely @jisungsleftcheek @hanjisbeloved @luvsskzs @knowleeknow @army-stay-noel @djeniryuu @bigsobs4skz @toplinehyunjin @channies-luv @foxinnie8 @biribarabiribbaem @dalamjisung @moasworld @sherryblossom @fawnpeaks @lukeys-giggle @obeythemasters @primoppang @devilsmatches @skz-streamer @freckleboilix @idkluvutellme @laylasbunbunny @cherry-edibles @cutiespaghetti @yourmercibeaucoupsblog @hanjisunginc

#stray kids smut #skz smut #seungmin smut #lee know smut #skz x reader #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #stray kids scenarios #skz scenarios #stray kids fics #skz fics #kpop smut #kpop fics #kpop fanfics #seospicy smut

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blnationwins · 6 months ago

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My stream of conscious having just finished the 4th episode of The Heart Killers:

I’m so confused… I thought they were hit men. But they also plant bugs and tap into software like spies. And they’re also just plain thieves who break into safes to steal jewels? And they have such an extensive wardrobe. Did they also rent a fire truck or hop out Fadel’s jeep dressed like firemen? Did they start a fire? Is there a cat stuck in a tree? Where did Bison get a fresh janitor’s outfit w/ no wrinkles & a PE outfit in their sizes in less than an hour? Speaking of which, where in the world did Style get a burger costume? I can only imagine it’s handmade. What other crafts does Style like to do? When will Style ever help his dad at the shop? Does Style order crop tops or know how to hem and crops any shirt he likes himself? Is he bisexual? Everyone has chemistry with everyone. When will they have a foursome? Is that incest? And why do Fadel and Bison have a burger restaurant as a cover up in the first place? A cover up for what exactly? It’s not a money laundering front. Is it illegal to arrest small business owners in Thailand? Is it truly just Fadel’s passion project? Why does he love burgers? Where did he learn to cook and manage a business? Did he take online classes while training to be a killer? Why did Mother agree to it? Is she a shareholder? Can he cook anything else? How does Fadel not pull his hair out cooking and running food and bussing tables by himself? When will he hire real staff? The most shady part is that there are literally zero employees other than him & Bison and sometimes Style. What is happening?! Why does Kant never lock his door? When is he going to get a ring doorbell? Why do Fadel and Bison live in a mansion? Not really keeping a low profile. Do they have savings accounts? Or do they get an allowance from Mother? Who is Mother and why is she so bad at Mothering? What even is Keen? He looks older than both Bison and Fadel so why is he not “in the field” yet? Is he such a good assistant that Mother doesn’t want him to get killed? How did they train to become hitmen? Where at? Are they actually Mother’s adopted sons or what? Which came first, the adoption or the hitman training? How and when did Bison discover his kink? Does he listen to Rihanna? Does he go on r/bdsm? When will he get to use his ball gag? Why did Kant take a picture of it? How did no one notice him drugging Bison’s drink? He did it so conspicuously! Why would the bartender agree to make those shots and not call security immediately? Dude’s sus! Will they start a gay bowling league? Can Fadel bowl? Will Style have to get a C-section? How in the world are they going to be able to raise a kid? They’re both so busy. Is Bison ready to be an uncle? What are the hours Heart Burger is open? Do they have milkshakes? When will we see a shrew?

Phew!😮‍💨 I could do this all day… Anyway, so far I’m loving this series! Shakespeare would be proud (and I actually mean that)

#the heart killers #thk #fadelstyle #the heart killers the series #kantbison #thk rant #thk ep 4 #thk kant #bison thk #style thk #fadel thk #thk questions #taming of the shrew

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probablyasocialecologist · 1 year ago

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Surveillance developments of the 21st century have replaced the traditional gaze of the supervisor on the industrial factory floor with an automated, digital one that continuously collects real-time data on living, breathing people. Even unionized workers do not have an explicit legal right to bargain over surveillance technologies; when it comes to the right to privacy, unions have an uphill battle to fight. We now live in a world where employees are stuck in a web of participatory surveillance because they consent to be monitored as a condition of employment. Today’s workplace surveillance practices, as in the case of Amazon, have become invasive and almost limitless. Technology has allowed employers an unprecedented ability to surveil workers. Management can minutely track and persistently push workers toward greater productivity at the risk of exacerbating harms to workers’ physical health, as the high rates of injury in Amazon warehouses show. And the growing business of selling workplace surveillance software has allowed for massive amounts of data to be collected on working people: when and who they talk to, how quickly they complete tasks, what they search for on their computers, how often they use the toilet, and even the state of their current health and moods.

#work #privacy #surveillance

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thefloatingwriter · 10 months ago

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the grand master post of all things D3

made by a person who definitely thinks about a district that was never actually canonically described a little too much

so. let’s get into the fun stuff!

District Three consists of two main “areas” or zones: the Stills and the city of Stepanov, which is the main city in Three, named after the first mayor of Three, who’s full name was Hewlett Stepanov. It is still a popular name in Three, especially with the wealthy, and the Stepanov family are respected highly by citizens.

if you’ve read my other posts about d3 and everything related to it, some of this is just restating but some of it is new so make sure to find that stuff! here are all of the posts: Beetee + Wiress headcanons | District Three Lore + List of Victors + even more Beetee + Wiress headcanons | Wiress did not grow up poor - opinion | Wiress with Cats | The Latier Family Tree [extended version] | even MORE Beetee + Wiress headcanons | Beetee headcanons pertaining to his childhood | Wiress headcanons pertaining to music + music that is most prevalent in Three | really random hcs about Beetee’s great grandparents | Beetee’s dynamic with the other victors + a little of Wiress and Beetee’s relationship | Beetee’s love language | Beetress headcanons | Beetee’s parents and home life headcanons | Beetee and religion | Beetee and Brutus friendship | Beetress first meeting | Beetee and English (plus beetress) | How beetress fell in love + Beetee’s realization | Beetee post-rebellion | Axel Latier (Beetee’s nephew) and Barbara Lisiecki (Wiress’ sister) headcanons | D3 Tributes headcanons | Is D3 an underdog district? | Wiress’ family and their feelings about her Games | Beetee and forced prostitution [cw: graphic description/depictions of forced prostitution] | Beetee and Coriolanus Parallels | D3 Tribute List | Beetress and Power Dynamics | Various Beetee Headcanons | D3 Specific Beliefs | D3 Culture (All Social Classes) |

tags: dayne’s beetee tag | dayne’s wiress thoughts (TM) | the latier family | everything beetee/wiress is under beetress

this will be separated into sections because i have a lot of thoughts lol

General Info:

District Three consists of the majority of Idaho/the Idaho Panhandle, some of west Washington, and east Montana. There also a tiny, tiny little bit of modern Oregon. D3 borders One to the south and east and Seven to the north and west.

The area that is considered “District Three” is not all used for living and the majority of it is forested land. Due to this, lumberyard workers from Seven travel the short distance from the two districts to harvest many of these trees. This is also true for miners from One in terms of gems.

Three makes and produces the vast majority of all technology used in Panem, cars, glass, and various drugs.

Child labor is a major issue, as children from the Stills begin working at factories as early as age four/five. Much of the time, there is an encompassing building attached to the factory that your parents work at for children who work.

Stepanov:

Saint Stepanov (typically shortened simply to Stepanov during the ADD¹/DHG²/BSR³ era) is the main city of Three where wealthier citizens live, or there version of Twelve’s “merchant class”. Adults who live here work as software developers and engineers, factory owners or managers, analysts, programmers, etc. These citizens typically live good lives with fulfilling jobs and nine times out of ten, no one will ever have to worry about where the food on the table comes from.

Only one year in Hunger Games existence were both children reaped were from the wealthier families of Three. The 48th Annual Hunger Games came as a shock to everyone, when both Wiress Lisiecki and Fortran Stepanov were reaped.

The square in Stepanov is where the Reapings take place. All children of reaping age can fit, but families usually have to stand in accompanying streets or are pushed to the back.

¹—After Dark Days | ²—During Hunger Games | ³—Before Second Rebellion |

The Stills:

The majority of Three’s population lives in poverty or on the cusp (about 150k out of 190k), in the area called the Stills, which consists of five separate neighborhoods/towns joined together by a square in the middle called The Interface. The Interface is where the main marketplace for the Stills is, including a popular bar called Harlow’s.

The majority of the Stills inhabitants work as factory workers/laborers. Almost always, these workers work in these jobs for their entire lives. They are not given the same opportunities as the citizens from Stepanov are. Due to this, a lot of animosity from both sides of the divide is very prevalent in everyday life.

Citizens from the Stills are taught from a young age about doing whatever it takes to survive. Because of this, tributes from the Stills typically do better in the Hunger Game than their wealthier counterparts.

— Midtown:

Midtown is the in between area to the Stills and Stepanov. Only around 10k of the overall population live here. Inhabitants of Midtown have jobs that include factory manager, training jobs, and about half of the jobs not pertaining to Three’s industry. People from Midtown are teachers, business/shop owners, and various other occupations.

Midtown is on the other side of Stepanov to the Stills, a short walk down a small hill. Due to the small population, few tributes in the Hunger Games are from Midtown, but there are exceptions. Examples of this include Circ Bauer, male tribute of the 10th Annual Hunger Games, and Matilyne Sanchez, female tribute of the 47th Annual Hunger Games. The 45th Games was the only year where both tributes from Three were from Midtown, with Coball Alves-Torres and Maple Adomaitytė.

Victors Village:

As of the Third Quarter Quell, there were five residents of Three’s Victors Village.

Address — Game — Name — Age at Victory

316 — 16th — Attican (“Atlas”) Hoffman — 16

340 — 40th — Beetee Latier — 19

348 — 48th — Wiress Lisiecki — 18

355 — 55th — Marie Teller — 15

368 — 68th — Haskell Nishimaru — 16

— The Victors:

Name: Attican Hoffman

Kill Count: Six

Type of Reaping: Regular reaping

Birthplace: Hewlett Memorial Hospital, Stepanov, District Three

Name: Beetee Latier

Kill Count: Nine

Type of Reaping: Rigged reaping

Birthplace: Apartment Building 9, Floor 6, No. 612, Three Falls, District Three

Name: Wiress Lisiecki

Kill Count: Five

Type of Reaping: Regular reaping

Birthplace: Hewlett Memorial Hospital, Stepanov, District Three

Name: Marie Teller

Kill Count: One (technicality; she caused six deaths, but only actually killed one)

Type of Reaping: Rigged reaping

Birthplace: Apartment Building 6, Floor 3, No. 321, Three Falls, District Three

Name: Haskell Nishimaru

Kill Count: Two

Type of Reaping: Regular reaping

Birthplace: Apartment Building 3, Floor 3, No. 387, Dreier Springs, District Three

Important Characters:

— Parents of Victors:

The Stills —

Ada Latier (née Brownstone) — mother of Beetee Latier. Lost her older sister, Cora Brownstone, to the sixteenth Games.

Linus Latier — father of Beetee Latier. Lost his younger brother, Hermes Latier, to the fourteenth Games. Linus and Ada found each other as the only person who understood the pain of losing a sibling to the Games.

Annabeth Teller (née White) — mother of Marie Teller. Family friend of the Latiers. Grew up in the Stills.

Fox Teller — father of Marie Teller. Grew up alongside Linus Latier and were childhood friends. Fox and Anna were the reason Ada and Linus met.

Stepanov —

Aurora Lisiecki — mother of Wiress Lisiecki. She runs a circus/theater group to entertain Threes and visiting Capitol citizens.

— Siblings of Victors:

Adeline Latier — younger sister of Beetee Latier. She’s younger than him by six years. She was thirteen when he was reaped.

Roent Latier — younger brother of Beetee Latier. He’s eight years younger than Beetee. He was eleven when he was reaped.

Tera Latier — younger sister of Beetee Latier. She’s ten years younger than Beetee. She was nine when he was reaped.

Ruther Latier — younger brother of Beetee Latier. He’s ten years younger than Beetee. He was nine when he was reaped. Tera and him are twins.

Dayta Latier — younger sister of Beetee Latier. She’s thirteen years younger than Beetee. She was six years old when he was reaped.

Barbara Lisiecki — older sister of Wiress Lisiecki. She’s four years older than Wiress and was twenty-two when she was reaped. Grew up in Stepanov but moved out to live in the Stills after she was expected to join the family business (the circus/theater group).

Various —

Amalia Remizova — female tribute of the 40th Hunger Games, age 13. Grew up in Stepanov.

Fortran Stepanov — male tribute of the 48th Hunger Games, age 18. Grew up in Stepanov.

Stefan Stepanov — older brother of Fortran Stepanov, Wiress’ district partner for the 48th Hunger Games. He was also in the same kindergarten class as Beetee. Grew up in Stepanov.

Appa Enriquez — owner of a small clothing store in the Stills. Distant relative of Beetee on his mother’s side. Grew up in the Stills.

Additional Information:

Three is not an “Anyone But A Career” district. They have never been one.

Every single time a Three wins the Hunger Games, a victor from One precedes them. Every. Single. Time. Atlas was preceded by Harrison Sanford, Beetee by Paris Sanford, Wiress by Zircon (“Connor”) Lewis, Marie by Emerald Reeves, and Haskell by Augustus Braun.

Three’s victors are sometimes seen as a buffer between the careers and the outlying districts. Most of the citizens of Three don’t have a problem with the Careers, except for some people from Stepanov.

In Stepanov, residents celebrate what children refer to as “Tree Time” during December—families use left over trees from the workers from Seven and display them in their homes with generational ornaments. Every year, at least one new ornament is added to the tree. Some families use breakable plastic to put new year’s resolutions inside of the ornaments and then break them on New Year’s to read them with family and friends at midnight.

Every Saturday, business owners in Midtown set up a marketplace for citizens, primarily ones from Stepanov.

In the Stills, names are very important. Due to the extreme poverty many are trapped in, a common phrase is, “I have nothing but my first and last”, meaning their first and last name.

#dayne talks #this was just a load of yapping so i’m sorry abt that lol #beetee latier #wiress #wiress thg #district 3 #hunger games districts #thg #the hunger games #thg victors #dayne’s beetee tag #dayne’s wiress thoughts (TM)#dayne’s thg victors

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sketch-owl · 6 months ago

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All About the Joker Post!

Hello fellow Tumblr users, if you’ve stumbled across this wall of text congrats! You love and enjoy Batman content just as much as I do. This is a dedicated lore dump all about the one and only Joker as he exists in my Batman AU.

If this is the first one you’re reading, here’s a bit of backstory: This AU has existed in my brain for many years, though in true writer fashion I haven’t properly written it all out. Though eventually, I intend to make this into a work of fiction with chapters and everything. For now though, I have managed to write out all of our major characters’ backstories.

Before delving right in you should know that this story has dark themes that take place within the story and content that can be triggering, so if you are sensitive to those please read with caution or skip this one altogether. Mental health takes first place over silly Batman characters.

⚠️ Trigger warning for:

Death

Torture

Murder

Jack Napier aka the Joker had a loving and supportive family growing up, living a life of privilege. Both his mother and father had successful careers, his father working in software engineering and his mother owning her own business selling home-made baked goods and doing custom catering orders for large events. Jack was an only child, but he had no shortage of his mother’s undivided attention. He would often help her in the kitchen with measuring ingredients and adding them into bowls, and in between baking times they would play pretend in their living room. Jack loved baking with his mom, developing a love for everything sweet from an early age. But what he loved even more was playing theater, where he would stand on stage (the couch) with hundreds watching (his mom). He would throw plays where he would act every part, and the audience would add in the sound effects. The clapping of horse hoofs in his old western play, the creaking of a basement door in his scary monster play, and the dramatic punches of a hero fighting the villain in his superhero play.

In school, theater was also his favorite. The singing, the dancing, the costumes, he wanted to do it all. He would often practice his lines on his classmates during other subjects, or try out his new jokes on the teacher, earning him the title of class clown. He had dreamed of growing up and becoming a famous comedian or actor. Though between the ages of 16 and 17 that dream had changed.

His father had died suddenly and tragically in a car accident, falling asleep at the wheel as he was on his way home from a long night at work. The car veered off the road, striking a light post and rolling down the sloped landscape several meters before stopping. The accident was just minutes away from home. Jack and his mother watched from the window as an ambulance and several police cars went by. His mother convinced herself that it was nothing to worry about, whatever was going on didn’t need her concern. When her husband didn’t return at the normal time, she told herself that he must have been held up by the accident, that was all. He would be home safe soon. She stayed up all night waiting for him, praying. There would be a knock on the door early the following morning. Jack had crawled out of bed at the noise, peeking his head into the front room. His mother answered the door, wiping the tired from her eyes. Two police officers stood on the other side. One of the officers spoke quietly, something Jack couldn’t make out. His mother screamed and collapsed to the ground before the officer could continue. Jack rushed to her, holding her, and that’s when he heard it. His dad had died. The officer did his best to explain what happened. His mother wailed hysterically while Jack sat quietly, hugging her.

From that moment forward things had changed in their home. His mother had closed her baking business and found a job as a server in order to make ends meet. At first there was a period of time where his mother was constantly angry. She would cry and yell and rant about how stupid his father was to fall asleep while driving. He should have gone to a hotel. How could he leave her and his son like this. It wasn’t fair. She had planned out her whole life with him, and now she was left alone to pick up the pieces. His mother’s short fuse was often directed at her son. If he was falling behind in his academics in favor of doing theater, she would scream at him about how she already had a heavy burden to bear, and how disappointed his father would have been if he were here.

Jack decided the following year of school that he would drop theater as a class. He devoted a majority of his time to studying and greatly improved his GPA. Outside school he would also start working a part-time job, and help with a majority of the house chores. The house would always be clean when his mother came home. Eventually the anger and resentment his mother had went down, though she did not go back to her old happy self like Jack hoped. Her spirit was gone, only a shell of her remaining. Baking was the thing that had brought her so much joy, and now she had ordered takeout for every meal. But Jack couldn’t blame her. She had been through so much that the only thing he could do was be the support that she was missing.

After graduating, Jack had excitedly announced to his mother that he decided to pursue engineering. Not quite the same career that his father had, but it was within a similar field. He took her hands while trying his best to contain himself. This news was only half of the surprise that he had been holding onto, and the other half was something he had been wanting to do for his mom for a long time.

With a wide grin on his face, he said that he also was planning to move out to Gotham, the most technologically advanced city and then begin his career as an intern at Wayne Tech. He already had a place picked out that he would be renting, a spacious apartment in a good area of West Gotham with an amazing view over the city. He asked her if she would move with him. The apartment had two rooms and one bath, and a good sized kitchen. It would be perfect for her to do any baking or cooking just like she did before. She didn’t need to keep working her server job anymore, because as soon as he was done with university and his intern program he would bring enough money for the both of them. She could retire early and best of all, he would be right there to take care of her.

He was holding her hands close to his chest, eyes bright as he laid out his plans for the next several years. He beamed about how he was going to be at the forefront of technology innovation, and be a part of a massive team of incredibly intelligent people. As he spoke her expression didn’t change. After he was done, he waited for her response. She looked away from her son, shaking her head.

She said in a soft voice that she had lived in the same home for decades. All of her happiest memories were attached to the house. Marrying the love of her life, raising him, starting her business. While it was thoughtful of him to think of her, she couldn’t just uproot her life on a dime. Jack’s smile slowly fell. He told her that it was alright if she didn’t want to decide right now, saying that she could think about it. She pulled her hands away, saying that she was deciding right now, and her answer was no. Jack insisted that she reconsider then, saying that when he makes it at Wayne Tech she could start her baking business again and make new happy memories. She said that she didn’t want to go back to baking. That dream had passed a long time ago, but that didn’t mean he needed to hold himself back from reaching his dream. If he wanted to go be an engineer then he could do that without her.

Jack looked at his feet. He breathed deeply, holding in the emotions that threatened to spill over. He said that he didn’t want to go anywhere without her. Gotham city was on the opposite side of the country, and if something were to happen to her he wouldn’t be able to help her. She looked back at him. She said that if anything happened to her, then he would be ok.

Over the course of the following month, Jack had packed up his life into boxes. His belongings would be traveling by a moving truck while he and a backpack would be traveling by train. He hugged his mom tightly the day of his departure like it would be the last time, and then set off for a new life.

It took several days before he finally crossed into Ohio, then soon after he was at the Gotham Bay docks. Since Gotham was a series of islands that floated in the mid-section of Ohio, he would then need to board a ship to make it the rest of the way. The weather during the trip had shifted drastically from the hot humidity of Florida to the cold dryness of the northern states. It would take him some getting used to. The wind whipped through him as the ship moved steadily forward through dense clouds of fog. He wondered to himself how the captain of the ship knew where he was going, but then he saw it. Small lights in the far distance. Gotham city was so bright that you could find it even in the fog.

The ship pulled into the East Gotham docks. From a distance Gotham looked small in comparison to the rocky waters that surrounded it. But as they drew closer, the buildings on the island grew larger. Jack felt so tiny but so captivated. He had never been outside his home town before except for trips to the beach, and now here he was, standing before this massive and beautiful city. Despite it being dark and cloudy, the island seemed to glow with lights coming from buildings and signs and billboards with screens.

The people around him began to shuffle off of the ship and Jack followed along with the flow of traffic. He knew where to go, but looking around him he also didn’t at the same time. His sense of direction and confidence had been ripped out from under him the moment he stepped onto the train back home. Though everyone ahead of him seemed to know where they were going, as large groups of people filtered into a line to go down a flight of stairs that disappeared under the cobblestone walkway.

Making his way down, he was met with a place that was just as large as the boat docks he got off from, but more grandiose. It reminded him of an underground town square, as this place was bustling with people that arrived on other vessels. The walls were made of brick and held candle holders which lit the space, as well as chandeliers overhead. In the middle of the large open area were deep trenches that stretched across the room and into tunnels through the back wall. Jack looked at them puzzled, though it wasn’t a moment later before a train with a sleeker style came through the tunnel and slowed to a stop with steam hissing off its body. The world’s first ever subway. Jack tried to hold back his excitement but couldn’t help but jump giddily, a wide grin on his face. Some people around him gave him odd looks, but he didn’t care. This was the coolest thing he’s ever seen.

Looking at a nearby map board, Jack figured out which train he needed to take and which stop he needed to exit off of to get to the far side of the island. From there he would need to board another vessel to take him to West Gotham. Though after arriving at his destination, he was looking around confusedly. There was meant to be another travel ship at this dock but there was only a shipyard where goods and trade are delivered and sent out.

He went to ask someone who was walking out from the subway, but they only sneered at him in response and kept walking. Perhaps he was at the wrong dock. He was taking another look at his map when a strange sound caught his attention. His eyes shifted up towards it, and peeking out from the clouds in the sky slowly moving through the air was what he could only comprehend as a skyship. Jack would later learn that it was called a blimp. Forget the subway, this was the coolest thing he’s ever seen.

In complete awe and wonderment he watched the blimp descend down onto a landing platform a few blocks away. The flying ship was just as big as the city buildings surrounding it, and when he went to board it there were close to a hundred people on board. The inside of the blimp didn’t have much for seating, just a few benches for the elderly and disabled. Everyone else was standing, which had Jack worried. He made a beeline to the wall which had large windows going all the way around the room. When the blimp was set to rise in the air, Jack pressed his back against the wall and prepared to be shaken. Though nothing happened. He opened his eyes and looked over his shoulder at the window. They were slowly rising upwards getting lighter like a balloon being blown up. The ground got further and further away, until eventually it disappeared underneath low hanging clouds. He could feel the pressure in his head shifting as it entered the higher atmosphere, a feeling he was not used to. The blimp slowed to a stop for a few moments before moving forward, the sound of soft whirring kicking on as the propeller blades on the ship sprung to life.

The ship moves in a counterclockwise direction going from island to island he came to find out later. From East Gotham they went to South Gotham, then West Gotham. Much like a train making stops, he stayed onboard until he reached West. The entire trip he was looking out the window, taking in as much as the weather would allow. The sight of the city from this height was beautiful.

Upon landing, he tracked down the nearest subway station and caught one that would take him closest to his apartment. It was a bit of a walk after departing the train, but Jack didn’t mind. He got to look around on ground level what would be his new home, getting to know the street names and nearby shops. While walking, he noticed there were a lot of cars and traffic on the road. It was a lot of traffic in his experience at least. He wondered why everyone in Gotham couldn’t walk to their destinations, it seemed much easier and quicker, especially with the subways and blimp.

Finally at last he arrived at the apartment complex. This was where he would be staying for the foreseeable future, at least until he gets hired full time at Wayne Tech and starts saving his money for a house. A thought had crossed his mind as he stepped inside the landlord’s office to retrieve his key. Once he got a house he could ask his mom again to move in with him. Perhaps the idea of living in an apartment turned her off to it, but a nice house and him being financially successful could change her mind. He pushed that thought away for now though, greeting the landlord behind the desk. His moving truck should be coming in by the end of the day, so he had some time to kill.

He spent the rest of the day sightseeing, visiting the park, browsing the shops, grabbing food and sweets. Wherever his eyes were drawn he followed. When it started to get late he headed back to the apartment. His mind was buzzing with excitement still from it all, though he felt his feet drag behind him exhausted from travel. Surely he would be able to wind down enough to sleep while unpacking his bedding. He went to the landlord’s office, though the lights were turned off. A sign was posted in the window: hours 8am - 8pm closed on Sundays. Jack scratched his head. This shouldn’t be a problem, he could simply go check the back parking lot himself for the moving truck.

Going around the building, Jack had checked all around the place with no truck in sight. Perhaps his things were moved into his room already. He didn’t ask them to do that, but it’s possible. He went up to his apartment room, unlocking the door with his key. He hasn’t been inside the room yet, and while excited to see it in person he was first looking for a pile of boxes. Swinging the door open, he was met with nothing. The apartment was empty. He laughed nervously. Ok, don’t panic. Just call the moving company and see what’s going on before jumping to conclusions.

He took a breath and went around the rooms, finding the home landline phone. It had taken a while before he could get a hold of someone. He anxiously tapped his foot while waiting to hear where the truck was. The front desk clerk had finally returned and said that the truck with his things was running behind, and instead of arriving by today it was going to arrive a few days later. His heart sank. All he had was what he brought with him on the train. That night he slept on the floor, using his bag as a pillow.

Before he knew it the sun was rising and he barely slept. His back was stiff as he pushed himself up, moving over to the window. While watching the sunrise, he went over in his mind what he needed to do that day. His first semester at college will be starting next week and he needs to get books and supplies. He also needs to attend orientation tomorrow. But first things first, he was hungry. A few donuts and a shower later and he was off to the nearest book store.

Gathering up the books that were required by the school and a few other supplies like notebooks and pencils, he brought everything up to the register. He reached into his bag to retrieve his wallet. He couldn’t find it though with the amount of things he had packed into it, so he apologized to the store clerk and pulled some of the stuff out of the bag. His wallet must have fallen to the bottom. He pulled everything out, searched every pocket, patted down his pants. He couldn’t find it anywhere. His wallet was missing.

He left the store empty handed. He shook his head at himself. How could he be so careless as to misplace his wallet? It had to be at the apartment, maybe it fell out of his bag. A quick jog back home and a look around the place turned up nothing. There was only one conclusion left. He had been robbed. Jack cursed to himself. The cash that was in the wallet was as good as gone, but most of his money was still on his card. He went downstairs and phoned the bank, placing a hold on his card and requesting a new one. Though it would take some time before it would arrive.

He hung up the phone, staring at the wall of the apartment lobby. What was he going to do now? He needed money for those books and more importantly food for the week. The snacks he had gotten yesterday would be gone by tomorrow. It was then that something caught his attention. A bulletin board next to the phone. Several flyers were posted, some about service advertising, some about missing persons. But one stood out to him from the rest: a flyer promoting a comedy show at a local bar.

The show was free and just the distraction he needed. After his college orientation, he went to the bar that night. While he wasn’t able to buy himself a drink, he enjoyed himself watching different comedians go up on stage and do their acts. One of the comedians had done a bit where he was interacting with people in the audience, guessing what kind of drink they were having. He then pointed to Jack, asking him if he was having a drink tonight. Jack shook his head, which the comedian booed him for. The guy on stage said that he would have asked if he was the designated driver tonight, but he’s seated alone. So instead he asked why he came to see the show by himself. Jack answered honestly, saying that he’d just got into town. The comedian nodded, welcoming him to Gotham and asked the audience to do the same.

He jokingly asked Jack how the rats had been, which made the bar erupt into laughter. He then asked Jack what made him move to Gotham. Jack said that he was going to be starting college soon. The comedian chuckled and said if that was why he wasn’t drinking tonight, he was a broke college student already.

That jab had struck a nerve in Jack. He was painfully reminded of why he was here seeing this show in the first place. When he had stopped smiling, the comedian said to him to not take himself so seriously. He continued, saying his situation was very common, in fact many people from around the world come into Gotham to attend school. Only difference is they have mommy and daddy paying for everything, and he’s a sorry sap in a bar who can’t afford a drink. The audience laughed. Jack felt himself sink in his chair. He wanted to get up and leave right then and there. Coming to this show was a mistake and he should have just stayed home in his empty and sad apartment.

But then the comedian asked him another question. He asked him what he was going to be studying in college. Jack looked up at him, and without much thought or hesitation he answered ‘How to be a real comedian, unlike you.’

The audience ‘ooooh-ed.’ The comedian looked taken aback, though righted himself quickly. He asked Jack if that was why he was really here, to steal his material. Jack said back that he didn’t need to because his jokes were shit. The comedian brushed him off, saying that the audience clearly disagrees with him. But in any case, he’s not going to entertain hagglers. He then moved on, pointing to another person in the audience to make a guess on what kind of drink they were having. The person he picked had spoken up before he could continue, saying that she wanted to see the college kid on stage. The people around her said they did too. Soon the whole audience was looking at Jack and asking him to show up the other comedian.

What was once a fun comedy night had quickly turned into a battle of comedians, which was arguably more entertaining. Jack got up on stage, his opponent forcing the microphone into his chest before finding a table. The audience stared at him, waiting expectantly. Jack cleared his throat. His mind was blank. He hadn’t been on a stage since he was a kid. He searched his brain for something to say, some introduction joke to get the crowd laughing. But all he could think about was how alone he was. He had moved out to this city to start a life of his own and nothing had gone according to plan. He had no bed, no money, and no mommy or daddy to help him.

He looked at the microphone in his hand. It was then that a realization struck him. He held the microphone up, introducing himself and where he was from. He told the audience that Florida was nothing in comparison to Gotham city, truly. When he was living on his own back home, it took him at least a week before he got robbed. But here it took him less than a day before his wallet was stolen.

He retold the unfortunate series of events, making himself to be this young and dumb college kid that is more book smart than street smart. The audience had ate it up, laughing at every turn of the story and waiting to see what happened next. The final part to his story was how he wound up in the bar, not a penny to his name, being picked on by an asshole on stage. Even the asshole in question was smiling at his table. After his tale was concluded he thanked everyone for coming out tonight, then went back to his seat.

The crowd clapped and cheered, some even shouting that they wanted more. A bar staff member jumped up on stage to calm the energy level down and introduce the next comedian. Jack sighed with relief. Although the audience had loved his performance, he didn’t mean to take over the other guy’s show. Even if it was shit. He was snapped out of his thoughts when a glass was placed down at his table by one of the waitstaff. Jack excused himself, saying that he didn’t order anything and that they had the wrong table. The waiter said that someone else had bought him the drink, then went on their way. He looked back at the glass. A smile spread across his face. He sipped on the drink while watching the rest of the show.

Once the show had concluded, the bar staff had gone on the stage one last time to remind the audience to tip the comedians and waiters if they liked what they saw and wanted more. People got up from their seats and began shuffling towards the door. Jack had stayed behind to finish off his drink, getting up from the table after nearly everyone had left.

A bar staff person had come up to him before he went out the door, handing him an envelope. Jack looked at them confusedly, asking what it was. They answered, saying it was the tips he made from the show. Jack looked even more confused, saying he wasn’t a part of the show. The tips should go to the actual performers. He tried to hand the envelope back, but they held their hand up and said that the people requested the money go to him specifically. They continued to say that the bar has comedy shows every weekend, so he was welcome to come by again but as a performer.

Later on when he was back in his apartment, Jack had opened the envelope. There was over a hundred dollars in cash contained inside. He stared at the money in disbelief. He didn’t feel he deserved it, though at the same time performing on that stage was so much fun. Perhaps it wasn’t a mistake after all to attend the show.

The next morning he went out and purchased the supplies he needed, having just enough left over cash to get himself some groceries. When he got back home, the landlord let him know that his moving truck arrived. For the rest of the day he unpacked, setting up everything just as he envisioned it. The last thing he did was his desk where he would be studying and doing homework. In a couple more days he would be a college student at West Gotham University. He just couldn’t wait to get started.

When the day finally arrived, it was everything he dreamed of and more. The university was bustling with students from all over the world. Even some in his class came from as far as New York to attend this school. Jack had felt right at home, surrounded by people who were just as passionate about technology as he was. A bit after starting school he received his replacement card in the mail and he had access to his money again. His funds that he had saved wouldn’t last forever though, and he would need to find a part-time job.

Though at night while he was studying at his desk, or while he was cooking himself dinner, his mind would wander back to the comedy show at the bar. He would daydream often while staring out at the city from his apartment window, thinking about the jokes and stories he could tell on the stage.

He played with the idea in his head of going back. The other comedians might not like him being there on the account that he stole the show from one of them. He couldn’t get the thought out of his head, until eventually one weekend where he just went for it. He went back to the bar and sighed himself up as one of the acts that night.

He was correct in assuming that the others wouldn’t be as welcoming towards him. Some of them made snide comments to him while he was waiting backstage to be called. The same guy that he called out was there as well. When Jack saw him he felt a tinge of guilt. But the man smiled at him, wishing him good luck tonight and that there were no hard feelings. Jack felt instant relief from hearing that, and the anxiety that was building had subsided some.

When it was Jack’s turn on stage, he gave it his all. He used the material that he thought up over the last couple of weeks, and he absolutely knocked it out of the park. He was well received by the audience, and the bar staff called him a natural for being new to the comedy scene. Then at the end of the show he was tipped almost double the amount he was given last time. Jack would continue to perform every weekend, using the show like his part time job. Not only did performing pay his bills, but he also had so much fun doing it. It never felt like a job to him, more like a second dream that came after his first one of being an engineer.

He continued this routine throughout his time in college, taking small breaks here and there when he was able to financially, that way he could allow his creativity to recharge. It was during his final semester that he met someone after one of his shows.

He introduced himself as someone who worked for the city of North Gotham, specifically he was the manager of Amusement Mile. He said that he loved Jack’s performance, saying that he obviously stood out from everyone else there. He could tell he put a lot of thought into how everything is written and structured, and that takes drive which he admired. Saying that he would cut right to the chase, he offered Jack a job opportunity working for him at Amusement Mile doing the same thing he was doing here but being paid much more than tips. His hours were flexible, and he would have full creative freedom to do what he wanted with his act. He didn’t need to make a decision right away, but if he was interested in going bigger to give him a call.

The man handed him a business card, which Jack accepted. He thanked him for enjoying the show, and the man left. He looked down at the card, absolutely stunned. He had known that the audience liked his performance, but he didn’t know he was good enough to be approached by a talent recruiter for a theme park.

While he loved the thought of performing on a proper stage and not in a bar, he wouldn’t have the time to do that after he started his career at Wayne Tech. Before he knew it his graduation day was here, and he was walking across a stage adorned with the tasseled cap and robe to receive his diploma. The feeling was bittersweet. He was the top of his class, his teachers saying he had a bright future ahead of him. Though looking out over all the parents sitting on the sidelines watching their now grown up children complete their final year of school had made him miss his mom that much more. She had already been on his mind that whole day, but now even moreso. His eyes stung with emotion. He inhaled sharply, pushing those thoughts down. He knew she would be proud of him regardless of if she were here to see him or not.

The following day he made preparations to apply to Wayne Tech. He called the front desk and asked if they had an opening for an intern or engineer apprenticeship. The secretary said he could come in for an interview a few days later. When the time came, he traveled over to North Gotham and took the subway to Wayne Tower. While up in the air he could clearly see what building he would be heading to, as it was the largest one on the island and possibly the whole city. Being the biggest landmark, the subway brought him right outside the building. Looking up at the building from this close really puts things into perspective. It was mind bogglingly massive.

The front had a courtyard area with trees, grass, benches, and a water fountain in the center. There were some people sitting outside either working or reading. One person sitting on a bench had their face in a newspaper, and as he passed them by his eyes skimmed over the headline. It was an article about Martha and Thomas Wayne and the recent charity they attended. How Jack wished he could meet the man that started it all, what a dream that would be.

Heading into the main lobby of the building, everything inside was just as ginormous as the outside. Right away everything felt so futuristic. The entryway had the Wayne Tech logo imprinted into the tile floor, and the walls were covered with television screens that displayed various looping photos of the company and its creation. Some photos were from when Wayne Tower was first being built, to now with the CEOs setting up charity events and donating great sums of money.

In the middle of the lobby there was a circle shaped help desk with a team of people working behind it. All of them were busy either answering phone calls or typing out letters on a writer. When he went up to the desk, one of the secretaries welcomed him to Wayne Tech before asking what she could help him with. Jack felt a sudden spike in his anxiety. He needed to make a good first impression with everyone he met here, because all of the people who work at this company know each other. Trying his best to smile normally and not be awkward he said he was here for an interview.

The secretary called one of the managers to let them know he was there, and after a couple minutes someone had come down the stairs and greeted him. She had him follow her to an upstairs office where she took a seat at the desk and he sat down across from her. This was it. This was his moment to secure a spot at the best company to work for. This needed to be his best performance yet. He needed to make his mom proud. His dad proud. The anxiety had moved up into his throat by this point. He couldn’t help but wring his hands together in his lap. He could feel his heart beating against his chest. The interview started with the manager asking him how he was. Jack laughed nervously, almost too loudly. He cleared his throat, saying he was good and excited to be here.

Minutes passed by like seconds, and just like that the interview was over. The manager had asked him all the usual questions that interviews ask. What made you interested in working for this company, what are your qualifications, what department are you interested in, what are some things about yourself, can you work in a team with other people. Jack had practiced answering these questions in his head several times leading up to this moment. At the end he felt very good about how it went. He knew he absolutely nailed it out of the park. His answers were spot on, he had the starting qualifications for an internship, and the manager seemed to like him. All he had to do now was wait for them to call him and say that he was hired.

So he waited. And waited. And waited some more. Over the weekend where he normally would go to the bar to perform, he opted to stay home on the chance that Wayne Tech would call him. Two weeks had passed by and he hadn’t heard anything. The doubt was eating away at him. What if he thought he did good but actually bombed it. He couldn’t take the uncertainty anymore. He called Wayne Tech’s help desk and asked for the status of his application. The secretary on the other end went to look for it. When she returned, she told him that there wasn’t a position open at this time for an engineer intern but they would keep him in mind for when the position opens up.

Jack’s heart sank to the bottom of his chest. He was so racked with emotion he didn’t think to ask her when the position would be open, he simply thanked her and hung up. He put the phone back on the receiver. He walked up the stairs to his apartment. He closed the door behind him. He looked over at the window in his living room. The view he had over the city. He sat down on his couch. He looked at the windows in all the other buildings for as far as he could see and how they lit up the island like stars in the sky. He buried his head in his hands and sobbed.

What was he to do now? He came to this city wanting to be at Wayne Tech. He went to school, worked hard, spent late nights studying, and earned his degree. But he was expected to wait around until they had room for him. The whole reason for him leaving home was to be an engineer at this company. He wasn’t even sure at this point if they would hire him even when the position did open. He was at an utter loss. He wanted so badly to call his mom. He missed her so much. Having her there made him feel safe. Like he could fall and she’d be there to catch him. They went through some hard times together, but she had still been there for him even if it wasn’t emotionally. But a part of him didn’t want to disappoint her. Telling her that he failed would make him feel even worse.

Eventually he had laid down in bed. His eyes had glanced over to his nightstand. The business card the man from the bar had given to him was resting on top. A thought had entered his mind, though he pushed it away immediately, it being too absurd to even consider. As he tried to sleep off the heavy weight that was resting on top of him, he kept returning to the thought. It was pestering him almost. Being an entertainer at Amusement Mile sounded fun and the man made it seem like he would be doing the same thing but with more perks. But he had no clue what he’d actually be signing up for. A theme park was far bigger than a mere bar. His act would need to be different to capture the attention of a much larger audience, all of different ages and backgrounds.

Despite being so exhausted that night, he tossed and turned. He fought with himself on what to do next and whether or not that was the right thing. He didn't want his money to have been wasted on a degree he was never going to use, but he also needed money that this performing job could potentially give him. He didn't want to disappoint his mom by becoming a clown act, but also he didn't know how long it would be before Wayne Tech decided to hire him. He was torn. While restlessly looking up at the ceiling, he had thought back to a time when he was this indecisive. His dad had told him that if he ever found himself torn, the best answer was either neither choice or both choices. Early the next morning he came to a final decision. He would do both.

He picked up the business card and gave the number on it a call. The new plan would be to see if he liked Amusement Mile, and if all goes well he would work the job until Wayne Tech hired him. He also planned to call them once every month to check in on his application and if the position opened. It had been awhile since Jack had met the man who gave him the card, but after introducing himself over the phone the man remembered him instantly. He said Jack could call him Jefferson or Jeff for short, and invited him to come over to Amusement Mile for a tour and chat whenever he was ready.

Jack went to go meet him that same day. Much like how Florida is known for being the home of Disney World, Gotham is also known for being the home of Amusement Mile, a massive carnival styled theme park on North Gotham. While flying over, Jack couldn't help but look out the window at Wayne Tower. He tried not to dwell on his thoughts, instead focusing on what questions he wanted to ask Jeff. Like before, after the blimp landed Jack rode the subway to the Northernmost side of the island. Not only is Amusement Mile the name of the park, but it’s also the name of the district with the actual park being one section of it on the edge of the beach.

Jeff had met him at the front entrance of the park, welcoming him in. It was still morning so Jack wasn’t expecting the park to be busy, but after Jeff started to show him around there was actually a sizable amount of people. There were rides and games of course, all typical of a regular carnival. But there were also live shows, band concerts, vendors, and an entire zoo. It was like a fair that was here all year long. The place was much bigger than Jack was anticipating, making this job even more intimidating. But as he and Jeff were walking he explained that Jack would be working in the big top tent where they host live shows.

They headed inside the tent, which was more like an auditorium. The place was arranged in a big circle with the stage in the center and the seats were raised bleachers that went all the way around. Instead of facing the audience in front of him, Jack would need to constantly be turning around as he was performing. Jack could feel his palms starting to sweat. He laughed nervously, the sound jumping out of his chest like a squeaking mouse. Jeff told him not to worry, adjusting to the style of seating is actually a lot easier than he’s thinking. He also needn’t worry about straining his voice, he said while walking over to the far back of the tent. He picked up what looked to be a microphone from behind a table, but it was much smaller with a headband attached to it.

At the end of the tour, Jack got to meet some of the other performers that had come in to do their show that morning, as well as the sound team. Jeff said that he was welcome to stick around and get to know everyone around the park, and after the show he could use the empty tent to practice. Jack smiled and thanked him. His heart was beating so fast that he couldn’t focus on much else. He sat down on the bleachers for a few minutes to catch his breath, feeling entirely overwhelmed by it all. What was wrong with him? He used to be so comfortable on a stage and now just the thought of getting up on this one is terrifying to him.

While trying to rationalize to himself, people began to filter into the tent. A few early birds turned into crowds of people, and soon every seat was taken. He wanted to leave and get away from the noise, though he decided against that. It would be rude of him to miss the show after meeting the performers, and he wanted to start off on the right foot this time.

The show involved a group of clowns doing comedy improv skits. They would call on audience members to randomly change something about the scene, either it be a prop, setting, or character that the performer was acting out. The show devolved into a hilarious chaotic mess, with the group just rolling with whatever the chosen audience members shouted out. Jack had forgotten all about feeling anxious, being absolutely captivated and laughing along with the people around him. Seeing the clowns freely jump from one idea to the next had given him so much inspiration for his own show. He could do anything, it didn't need to standup. He could start new and be anything he wanted, the only limits being that it needed to be age appropriate for kids. He would go home and get right to work.

Jack's first show at Amusement Mile would be at night when the amount of guests would be at their highest. He was nervous still, but breathed through it, reassuring himself that he would be alright. He could do this. He was getting ready in one of the dressing rooms next to the big top tent. He looked at himself in the mirror. You're alright, you can do this, he said to himself. There was a knock on the door, startling him out of his pep talk. Jeff was on the other side. He said he just wanted to check in with him and let him know that he had 5 minutes before showtime. He smiled and said that Jack looked fantastic. Jack thanked him, saying that he hoped the audience liked him too. Jeff reassured him that they absolutely will. He was going to knock their socks off. And he did.

When Jack stepped onto the stage, he was dressed from head to toe in a full colorful clown outfit. He had painted his face a traditional white with a red nose, lips, and tear drops under his eyes. He also tried to dye his hair blue but it ended up coming out as green, which he ended up liking way better. He took a dramatic bow in front of the audience, introducing himself as Jack the Joker.

The first half of his act started as standup, something he was familiar and comfortable with. He played the character of Joker, a goofy but mischievous clown who had been destined to be a prince but ran away from his life of luxury to follow his dream of spreading laughter and joy. As his persona he told stories to the audience with jokes sprinkled in. The ending would always tie back into the start of the story somehow, making a funny and satisfying conclusion. Then the second half of his act involved magic tricks. Jack had begun to teach himself how to do them, but it was taking him a while to perfect them. So instead the joke was that he was terrible at magic and his tricks would backfire on him. For this he would use firecrackers and sparklers, his simple card trick 'exploding' and making a huge mess across the stage.

At the end of the show he took a bow, making sure to rise up, turn around and bow again so he faced everyone. The crowd was the loudest one that he's ever gotten. Everyone, especially the kids were clapping and screaming and shouting for him to do one more trick. Hearing that, he decided that he could do one more. He said to the audience that for his last trick he would make himself disappear, and he was triple sure that this time it would actually work. He had saved some extra pyrotechnics in his jacket just in case the sparklers didn't light. He waved his arms around, shouting the magic pun-filled phrase before letting loose a smoke bomb. Just like that he had vanished. The kids went nuts.

Needless to say, the show went off without a hitch. Jack the Joker's show continued to be the most popular event to see at Amusement Mile. People of all ages came to watch, and each one was a different experience than the last. Jack would spend all of his free time coming up with new ideas and writing new material. The years had sped by like minutes. He had become so successful that he never thought about going back to Wayne Tech and asking to be an intern. Not when he had his face on a billboard advertising the park.

In that time he had improved greatly with his magic tricks and picked up more and more to use for his shows, only to intentionally have them fail spectacularly, though making it seem like it was accidental. Along the way Jeff had been a guiding hand to him. The pair had gotten to be very close, and often they would sit in the dressing room or big tent and work on their separate things. Occasionally Jack would run an idea by him, and Jeff would ask him his opinion on how to improve the park or tackle a problem. Then after another successful show they both would celebrate by going out to eat.

Jack was financially comfortable enough to where he could get himself a house, and then ask his mom if she would move in with him. That was always the plan, though he hasn't called her once since moving to Gotham. He had been too much of a coward to, backing out at the last minute out of fear of what she would say. He's gone over it in his head probably hundreds of times. How he would tell her everything leading up to him being successful as a performer. Perhaps she would be genuinely happy for him. Perhaps not. The uncertainty of how she'd react left him paralyzed to follow through with it. In his mind, if he kept putting off buying a house, then he never had to make that phone call.

He was thinking about it even now as he was wrapping up for the evening after another show. He just needed to do it. Like ripping off a bandaid. Jeff had poked his head in the dressing room, praising him for an amazing show and asking if he wanted to grab dinner. After the park's gates were closed the two of them walked out together, as they usually did. They both laughed about how funny the kids in the audience were that night, with their mouths held agape when Jack did his magic tricks.

Jeff told him how lucky he was to have stumbled across him that night at the bar. He had been out with some friends who lived in West Gotham and they wanted to grab some drinks. By pure luck and chance he met one of the funniest and most talented guys that he's had the pleasure of calling a friend. Jack smiled at him, saying he also felt lucky. When the plan he made for his life wasn't panning out, he had taken a leap of faith not knowing where he would land. Jack had owed it to him for believing he would make it, and encouraged him to keep going.

After they had dinner the pair went their separate ways. That would be the last time Jack would see Jeff. The following day Jack had gone to the park to do some writing for his next show. When he walked up to the front gates, the staff person behind the ticket booth had called him over. She asked him if he had heard yet. His confused response let her know that he hadn’t yet. She lowered her voice to a very soft tone, telling him that Jefferson had passed away last night.

After Jeff had gotten home last night he suffered a major heart attack. His neighbors had gone to check on him that morning because his normally quiet and sweet dog wouldn’t stop barking. When the paramedics arrived he was already gone and there was nothing they could do. The staff woman apologized to him, saying that she knew they both were close. She added that the park would be open today, but tomorrow it would be closed until a new manager is appointed by the owner of the park. Jack thanked her for telling him. He thought he should say more, but his voice had hung up in his throat. He needed to leave. He needed to leave right now, but his feet felt like cinder blocks firmly planted on the ground. The woman must have seen the hurt on his face because she told him that Jefferson had been in a long battle with his health, though he hid it from everyone. He never wanted others to worry about him. He was the kind of person that always wanted to lift you up, and he came into work everyday to do just that.

He thanked her again and turned to leave, forcing his feet to carry him back home. Without Jeff at the park Jack had no reason to be there outside his normal showtime. He tried to hold in his emotions until he got back to his apartment but was quickly failing. His heart ached. The suddenness of it all had made his mind go blank. He didn’t know if he should continue on like he had before, or cancel his next week’s show. The only thing on his mind was how could this have happened. If he had known, if he had seen the signs, maybe he could have been there to help him. He could have gotten the paramedics faster and they would have had more time to save his life. It was only after he stepped through his door that the realization finally hit him. He had just lost his best friend. He sobbed long and hard.

Jack had taken a few days to just do nothing. He decided during that time he would do the show coming up if the park was open. Jeff would have wanted him to keep going. But when he sat down to write he had trouble focusing. His head still felt like mush. Nothing he wrote down sounded good. He looked back through his old jokes and ideas for inspiration, but that spark that he once had wasn’t there. He knew he needed more time to clear his head, though he forced himself to continue anyway. He wasn’t happy with the end result, but it was the best that he could come up with.

The day before his show he went over to the park to see if it was open, which to Jack’s slight disappointment it was. He went over to the staff person at the ticket booth, which was a different person than last time he was here. He asked them if there was a new manager for the park. Not yet, the guy said, but in the meantime the owner was here keeping the place running.

Jack felt slightly relieved by that. Of course he would eventually have a new boss, but replacing Jeff this early felt too soon. It was already hard enough going into a performance and putting on a brave face. While he was there he might as well rehearse his show. Going inside, he went to the big top tent. There wouldn't be another show for a couple hours so he would have the place to himself. He began to walk through his lines like usual, improving some jokes to see if it sounded better. But as he continued he just wasn't into it. What he wrote wasn't landing in the same way it did before, and he wasn't sure why. Everything about it just felt wrong.

He tossed the book to the side, too frustrated to look at it anymore. He needed to come up with an entirely new act before his show tomorrow night, and he was at a loss of what to do. If Jeff were here he would have bounced ideas off of him. But he wasn't here. He needed to do it on his own.

A small voice had startled Jack out of his thoughts. He turned his head and a young looking girl was standing in the entrance way of the tent. She asked him if he was using the space. He shook his head no, hopping off the stage. She thanked him and got up. As he turned to leave, the girl asked him if he was done for the day. Jack said that he was just giving her space to do her thing. She nodded, looking down timidly. He had gotten to the entrance before the girl spoke again, asking if he didn't mind being her audience while she practiced, as she had found it hard to talk with no one there. Jack said he didn't mind at all, and walked back over to a seat.

As the girl did her act, Jack had given her some tips and suggestions on how to improve upon it. The main thing was her confidence. Jack said that he himself gets nervous before every show, but putting on a character helps him find that larger voice. Her character could just be her, but bigger and bolder. By the end of the rehearsal she could project her voice a lot louder and clearer, and her stiff movements were more free and natural. She felt a lot better with her performance, and gave him many thank yous.

Jack wished her good luck and went home for the day to write. For his show he ended up using more magic tricks than standup, that way the audience wouldn't pay as much attention to his jokes. The people loved him all the same, but he couldn't help but feel guilty. The audience deserved to have nothing but the best from him and he didn't deliver that. He sat in his dressing room taking off his makeup. He looked at himself in the mirror, half of his clown face wiped away.

There was a light knock on his door. A voice on the other side asked if Jack was there. He cleared his throat, acknowledging that he was. The voice apologized for interrupting him, but they came to tell him that the owner of the park wanted to speak to him. Jack froze in place. The owner wanted to talk to him? Instantly his mind began to race. His show didn't go well like it normally does and the owner wanted to talk to him. He quite possibly could be fired over this.

As he finished changing into his normal clothes, the dread was setting in. If he went home now he wouldn't be reprimanded for how horribly his act had gone. He could just skip past it like nothing had happened. But if he did that he would be in even worse trouble. As he grappled with himself on what to do, the decision was made for him. He heard someone call his stage name. He looked over and it was a taller man dressed in formal attire.

Jack smiled politely, walking over to him. The man introduced himself as the owner of the park and said that he'd been wanting to meet him. The owner asked to walk with him. Jack felt his heart beating out of his chest. He could tell just looking at the owner's expression that he was not happy. He swallowed, following the owner next to him as they walked around the park.

The owner started off by thanking Jack for putting on such an amazing show for the past several years. The amount of guests visiting the park had exploded in numbers, all to see his show. Jack nodded quietly, thanking him. The owner continued, saying that running an entire theme park was never easy. He had worked with Jefferson for a very long time to keep everything in the park safe and fun for all ages. But it was people like Jack that really kept the place open. Guests crave to see new and exciting things, and Jack has consistently done that.

They had stopped in front of one of the rides, brightly glowing with florescent lights as it spun around. The owner said that Jack could very well keep doing his thing, being a colorful character on stage. But he wanted to offer him an opportunity to help him that much more in overseeing the park as its new manager.

Jack looked at him dumbfounded. The owner laughed, saying that he knows it's sudden but to just hear him out on it before making a decision. Not only did Jefferson speak very highly to him of Jack and his problem solving skills, but he also had been looking for someone who could work well with others and keep spirits up just like Jeff did. The other day while he was there he had spoken to someone who said that Jack helped them improve their confidence. They said he listened to them, was kind and patient, and gave them helpful advice.

If he accepted the offer, the owner said he would train him himself on how to do everything involved with running the park. Customer service, safety inspections, budgeting, scheduling, everything. He also didn't have to give up being a performer either, even with all this new responsibility. The owner would work with him so he had time to write and plan his shows. He could have the best of both worlds. But if it was too much to take on the owner said he understood. It was a lot to ask of him. Finding the right person was like finding hay in a needle stack. If you choose wrong then it could result in major consequences.

Jack couldn't believe it. Just a few short years ago he was starting out as a performer dressed as a clown and now he was offered the position of park manager. The thought of being essentially the boss of everyone was more than a little intimidating. Helping out one performer with their show was one thing, it was an entirely other thing to watch over a hundred employees. This was simply just impossible. Though somehow Jeff found a way to make it work.

The following day he had made the decision to accept the job. For the next 5 or so years he would work hard to fill Jeff's shoes. He would go home everyday constantly exhausted from the work, but to him it was all worth it. He loved helping others and getting to use his creativity and knowledge in engineering to bring to life new ideas for the park.

Guests visiting the park were steadily going up with every new ride and show added. Instead of Jack performing once every week, he would perform once biweekly. One week Jack would have the responsibility of running the park, and the following week the owner would take over for him, only asking Jack to help him with smaller managerial tasks so he had enough time to write for the show.

Though during this time, crime rates in Gotham were also on the rise. A territorial war had begun with several different mafia organizations and the GCPD were struggling to keep up. Not only did this war cause mass amounts of property damage, in some areas even leveling multi-story buildings, but also the casualty count was skyrocketing including both mafia members and innocents caught in the crossfire. The people of Gotham were too scared to leave their homes for fear of being swept up in the chaos happening outside.

As a result of this, Amusement Mile was suffering financially. Tickets being sold were at an all time low to no fault of the park. Jack had figured once everything calmed down and the mafia was dealt with, things would go back to normal. Guests would return to the park and be able to enjoy the new attractions again. But the war had continued and persisted for months on end. Jack had brought the problem to the owner, suggesting that they temporarily close down the park to save on costs. However, the owner was of the opinion that the media were using the mafia for their news stories and making crime activity out to be a bigger issue than it was. Guests were still coming into the park, and it would be unfair to them to close their doors.

Money began to get tighter, and soon Jack was needing to pull money from anywhere he could just to keep the park afloat. Show budgets were cut, ticket and food prices increased, and eventually employees were laid off. It physically hurt when he needed to tell his own people that he couldn’t afford to pay them for their work any longer. The owner still wasn’t budging, insisting that the rates of crime would be handled soon and that they would be ok. Frustrated now more than ever, Jack had dipped into his own savings to stall having to let go more people.

He was lost on what to do. Usually he was able to come up with a solution to any problem, but not this time. They were going to go under and be forced to close and Jack wasn’t able to fix it. At least until he was approached one late night by a man who was waiting outside the park gates for him.

Jack had just finished a show, the tent being less than half full. The owner had pulled him aside afterward, telling him that he had to leave early and that he needed him to close up the park that night. Jack agreed, staying behind and waiting for all the guests to make their way out before locking the gate. As he turned around to head home as well, he came face to face with a man.

Startled out of his skin, he went to take a step back but the man just got closer and grabbed his shirt. He felt something shoved into his side painfully. The man spoke in a low, gruff voice, telling him to be quiet and not to move. Jack threw his hands up to the man’s chest, using all his weight to shove him off. Suddenly he became aware that he was surrounded by a group of men. One of them yanked him back by the hair, another punched him in the gut, causing him to collapse onto the gravel. He rolled onto his side, gasping for air and fighting the urge to throw up. He felt one of the men behind him grab the back collar of his shirt, picking him back onto his feet. The man he had shoved leaned into his face. He told him not to be stupid unless he wanted a bullet in him next, spitting the words as he talked.

Jack couldn’t move even if he wanted to, as his body uncontrollably coughed and convulsed. The man explained that he and his ‘friends’ were going to take his park and claim it as theirs. He was giving him two options: the first is that they break every bone in his body starting with his fingers, and when they’re done hang him out for the crows. The second option was that he tell them where his boss was and they’d think about letting him go. Jack’s heart was beating so fast that the sound was pounding in his ears. He held his hands up and said wait, wait, wait, the words spilling out of his mouth. Shakily he told them he didn’t know where his boss was, as he had left hours earlier. The man tsked. That wasn’t the response he wanted. One of the men took Jack’s hand, picking one of his fingers to bend backwards. Jack shouted for them to stop, there had to be something else he could do. Anything they wanted, they could have it. He just didn’t know where the owner was.

The man motioned for the other thug to stop. He said as a matter of fact, there was something they needed from him. If he paid them a fee they’d set him loose. The amount that he asked for was ridiculously high. Jack said that coming up with that much was impossible. The man shrugged, saying that he was out of luck then. The thug bent his finger back, snapping it with a sickening crack. Jack yelled out painfully, begging them to stop. He didn’t mean it was impossible to get the money, he meant that it was impossible to get it all at once. The money from the park was in a bank account, and he couldn’t withdraw all of it in one day. The man paused, looking hard at him. Jack was lying through his teeth. But the thugs bought it. The man said that he had a week to come up with the money. He warned him not to talk or run, as they’d be watching him. They’d know, and all the people that he works with would join him. After the men left, Jack laid on his back, breathing heavily. What did he just do? What did he just agree to?

As soon as he got home that night, he raced to the phone and called the owner. As the line kept ringing he was looking all around him with his back pressed up against the wall. Jack had called over and over, begging for him to pick up the phone, but there was no answer. No, it couldn’t be. Jack didn’t want to believe it. The owner had left him in the hands of the mafia. He was completely on his own.

He didn’t sleep that night. He had barricaded his door and window with anything and everything he had, but even then he didn’t feel safe. He was terrified that they would come for him because he made that phone call. He just wanted to warn him, but now he wasn't even sure if he was still in Gotham. He sat on the floor of his now empty living room utterly terrified. He didn’t know what to do now. He couldn’t call the police or try to leave, they would skin him alive before he could set foot on a boat and who knows what else they would do to his employees. The money they were asking for he didn’t have. He was barely scraping by with the park. The only thing he thought to do was continue running the park and hope that within a week it was enough.

Jack had gone back to work like nothing had happened. He greeted guests, helped performers with their shows, carrying on like he usually was. But while walking the grounds his eyes were darting everywhere. The men that cornered him that night could be inside the park, watching him, hiding amongst the crowds of people. With every passing day he would count up the money, his hands trembling when the numbers were short yet again. He looked down at his bandaged finger. It pained him to do it, but Jack withheld everyone’s paycheck. When they came to him the following morning asking about it, he lied and told them that there was an error with the bank and that they would be paid soon. He had no idea where he was going to get the money to pay them. In the end, it didn’t matter at all. His week was up and it wasn’t enough.

He had been so focused on getting the money and pretending like everything was fine that he didn’t write for his show. His show, which was so important to him that once upon a time he thought he would be fired over it not being up to par to his normally high standards, had been entirely forgotten. It was the least of his concerns. He only had three quarters of the money after pulling it from everywhere he could think of even lying to his own people. He had prayed to whatever holy force that the men would be satisfied and decide to spare him.

His show that night, the day of his deadline, would be entirely improv. He was getting ready in his dressing room, his hands shaking too much to get the teardrop on his other cheek to look right so he just left it as the one. His mind was spiraling. He hadn’t seen or heard anything about the men since. Perhaps they had forgotten about him, or even better they were killed by one of the other mafia. He breathed through the tightness in his chest. Out of all the places in the park that he’s been, the stage was where he had spent most of his time. That’s where he felt the safest, the audience being with him. He wouldn’t be alone, and that was assuring to him.

He breathed, in and out, focusing on becoming someone else. Someone a lot braver and bolder than he was. He went inside the big top tent, stepping onto the stage, the bright lights shining down on him. He took a bow, the audience clapped. He stood back up and his eyes made contact with someone sitting in with the crowd. It was the leader of that group of men. No, that wasn’t right. It was just someone who looked like the guy. His eyes were playing tricks on him because he was sleep deprived. They wouldn’t be here with all these people around. If they did come looking for him they would have waited for him outside the gates like they had done last time.

They both were looking at each other. The man clapped, a slight smile on his face. Jack the Joker grinned, thanking the audience for coming. He could feel the sweat begin to gather at his head. He had nothing prepared for what to say or do, he simply started talking about whatever came to his mind. He pulled a random story that he had written a long time ago but he never used it because he couldn’t come up with a good ending.

The story was about when he, the Joker, had run away from becoming a prince. He had rode far away from home on a horse. But when he stopped to rest, the horse had run away. He considered himself unlucky. But walking along the path on foot, he came across some farmers who had found his horse, and they were using it to steer their wagon. The farmers gave him a ride, and he considered himself lucky. But then it began to rain very heavily and the path became too muddy to continue. He considered himself unlucky. After it stopped raining, all the water filled a dried up stream bed. He and the farmers used the wagon to float down the river all the way to the next town. He considered himself lucky.

This was where the story had ended. As he was telling it, he thought about what could happen next to wrap it up nicely like all his other stories. But after telling it he realized that the story was perfect the way it was, as though it was always meant to be that way.

Jack used all of the fan favorite magic tricks for the latter half of the show. He produced flowers out of a wand, tossing them to an audience member, pulled apart connected metal rings with a flick of his wrist, and performed a dazzling and comedic light show with firecrackers. Even improvised, the audience loved him. They cheered his name as he took a bow. After everyone had made their way out of the tent, there was one person left.

The man slowly stood, clapping while he approached Jack on stage. The man said that he was impressed. He’d seen nothing quite like it before. Jack was frozen in place. He wanted to run but he knew that would just make it worse. He cleared his throat, saying that he had his money. From his coat pocket he produced a fat envelope. The man stepped onto the stage, snatching it from him and opening it. He looked through it, then looked at Jack, asking him if this was all. Jack swallowed, saying quietly that he couldn’t quite get all of it, though if they gave him more time he could make them the other quarter.

The man said that he had given him his chance already, and he was out of patience. He put the money back in its envelope, shouting for his men. As the thugs filed into the tent, Jack pleaded with him to just give him a little more time, just a little more patience and he would have it. He had nothing left in their account to give them, not his account, not the park’s account, he even stole what he did give him. The mafia surrounded him, grabbing hold of his arms and shoved him down to his knees.

The leader of the group tucked the envelope into the back of his pants, then produced a small, curved knife from his sleeve. He told him that for his trouble, and for putting on a great show, he would pay him back and show him mercy. He leaned down, grabbing Jack by his cheeks. Tears were spilling over his fear-filled eyes and causing his clown makeup to run. ‘Why so sad?’ The man asked him. ‘Turn that frown upside down.’

The man used his thumb and pulled the side of Jack’s mouth wide. He tried to thrash his head and crane his neck back, but one of the thugs grabbed him by the hair while the leader shoved his knife against his teeth, dragging the blade up. Jack screamed in horrific pain, and continued to scream when the man kept slowly pulling his knife further and further up his face. No one could hear him from outside over the sounds of the park.

After he was done carving one side of Jack’s face, he moved to the other side, forcing his mouth into a crude smile that went past his eyes. He was barely conscious by this point, his head bobbing around as though he were fighting sleep. All he could do was moan, the sound escaping his throat as a gurgle.

The man stood up and looked down at him, wiping the blood from his knife. Jack could see him talking, but he couldn’t hear the words. The men holding him let him go, and his body slumped over. The world seemed to move at a slower pace. He was getting cold, but he didn’t mind it. As he stared out through the entrance of the tent, everything had turned upside down. He was upside down, suspended by his feet above the stage. As his blood pooled to the back of his throat, Jack couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. His world was darkening, inviting him to join it. And he did.

His eyes flew open and he was instantly blinded by a bright white light. He winced, shutting them again. He went to cover them but he couldn’t move his hands. He could hear voices all around him, and as he tried to squint he was made acutely aware of the massive headache in his temples. Slowly his vision returned to him, and he realized that he wasn’t alone. He was surrounded by people, all wearing white coats, and they were staring at him. He was laying down on an uncomfortably flat table, his wrists and feet strapped down with a light over him shining in his face.

‘Can you understand us?’ He heard one of them ask. ‘Yes?’ He said confusedly. ‘Can you tell us your name? How do you feel?’ His eyebrows knitted together, his head pounding. They wanted to know his name? He’d only just woke up and he was being asked too many questions. ‘J- uh..’ He searched his mind for an answer but the pain only worsened. ‘Where am I?’ He said instead. ‘You’re in Arkham Asylum.’ The doctor answered.

#batman #batman au #lore #dc comics #dc #joker #the joker #Gotham Joker #writing

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