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#Made these for my own use but sharing is caring so
kaivenom · 2 days
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Dating Sir Crocodile HCS
A/N: this is based on a request made by an anonymous, i hope you read this. And i must admit that i got really long.
Masterlist
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Meeting
You either meet him by working for him or by being another mobster let's set the division here.
You work for him
You were selected by your habilities, he didn't care about your appearence, just your effieciency.
And you really were, that's what he liked and what made him ascend you really fast.
When you were like his second in command, you started to feel like you were overworking, same salary but much more work.
In the other hand, he started to feel the most relaxed he has been ever, your pressence was making him be better at work and all that comes with it.
You wanted a raise and he didn't give to you. He saw it as a lack of respect and you shut up, not wanting to damage the good relationship you both builded.
At the end you resigned a week after and he let you.
Spoiler, he couldn't stand it, not because him having to do the work, no, because he was alone and you weren't there with your calming pressence, the bad jokes and that good morning smile.
He lasted a couple of weeks, then he went to search you.
"So, someone can't do his job without help."
"It's not about the job."
"Then what it..." you couldn't continue because he was kissing you.
You returned, now at his second officially, no raise but unlimited access to his money.
You are another mobster
At first there was that cordial hostility between enemies that otherwise would be friends.
Both of you tried to make peace between your mobs but obviously, with your own terms.
To be more casual, you both decided to meet at dinner place.
Ussually mobs share living experiences to see if their life styles combine with their future allies, so you both would do that.
The problem was still unsolved so you needed another meeting, and then other and other, until you weren't even talking about alliances just life.
This is the point were your gangs started to see the new problem and wanted to solve it for their way.
"So, one of my seconds said that at this point if we want an alliance we should be married, crazy right?" you said flustered.
"It's not crazy, mine's said that too. We don't have to be marrid but maybe they are right and we should date."
"If dating goes wrong, we are doomed."
"Then we can't mess up, we can do a contract if that happens, if it makes you feel safer."
"Really?"
"Dating you seems like the perfect idea for me, like i don't desire to do so?" he was talking serious, he wanted to date but he was concious about it, now he had de excuse.
Dating
His love languages are gifts, anything you want then he has it the next morning on your door. And quality time: long afternoons on the office, sleepless lazy nights.
He can't do physical touch as much as he wants to thanks to his reputation and your safety, so that would be reserved to home.
The more you will have on public are cheek or forehead kisses, a small pat on your head or a little brush on the leg.
Then in the house, you won't have another sit that isn't his legs.
Big on commited men, this man has a special calendar in the office to remeber dates with you. He even has the secretary to remember him special dates if he forget due to work.
He knows he can get submerged on job so he does everything he cans to just don't dissapoint you, cause he knows you expect him to be working a lot.
Hes huge, we know that, so you will sleep on top of him or using him as a pillow and pray to not end up as the little spoon.
That doesn't happen ussually, so you don't get crushed but he will always have his arm on you (so you sleep on the side of his good arm)
If someone tries to threaten him, you are the one on lock down.
After a couple of years he will start to think about retiring and have a life with you and maybe a kid. The first thing it's difficult so he proposes to you to begin with that.
He is a master of deals and that applies to you, it's wonderful to know that he always listens to your concerns and tries to solve it or either get to a agreement.
He never reaises his voice with you and you are the only one that makes him laugh, like a real laugh, not the mafia boss grin.
NSFW
He needs to be in control always so disconecting from that in bedroom is difficult.
He tends to be dominant and give you orders (not that you complain) but on particular vulnerable days he is more able to let it go and you have the oportunity to lazily ride him with passionate kisses.
He can make you call him daddy but not sir, never that, everyone calls him that, but in bed you should never, it just clicks something on his mobster mind that he doesn't like. He is with you not in the job.
He doesn't like degradation either, maybe things like pointing your obvious need for him but not hummiliate.
I think he doesn't view sex like an everyday activity, he is a man but he is a grown one. If he gets a random boner he will try to hide it or let it happen, nothing much but... if you happen to be with a skirt or with a particular behaviour or he is specially needy for you, then he will go to catch you.
Definetily a growler and groaner, perfectly able to talk and tell you how good you make him feel and how good you are doing it. These are the times when he is the more talkative ever.
He loves to comunicate with these things cause he is a big man (you know what i mean) and he knows it so he wants to make you confortable. You both had a talk about it and you were more flustered about his serious face than to the fact that he was saying his dick will split you in half.
But things said, then he could fuck you like god, cause he knows how to do it.
He is more of a reciever, something about your pretty dollface between his legs with his dick half way into your mouth, it's so sexy.
You both even tried to take things out of the bedroom and try that famous scene were the girls suck the guy under the table on a meeting.
Spoiler: neither of you liked it so, things stayed in the bed.
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smashing-teacups · 16 hours
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My very dear friend (who is so grumpy that J&C hijacked her brain again when she wanted a break 🤣) @theawkwardterrier tagged me in an invite to share a section of one of my WIPs. So hey, how about a peek at an upcoming chapter of Atonement? 👀
______
In the second month, they began their respective job searches in earnest.
On that particular front, Claire had an undeniable advantage: there was a terrible nursing shortage throughout the UK, and more job postings than she knew what to do with. She had enough experience to be accepted at practically every bedside position, and so she had the ability to be selective.
A very fortunate state to find herself in, she found out rather quickly, as there were a number of positions that… well, positions she wasn’t sure she would be best suited for anymore.
Wound care, for example, was definitely out. Just reading the vague clinical expectations under the first post made her snap her laptop shut, her skin chilled and mind numb. She held Jamie from behind later that night, tears soaking her pillow as she traced the scars that had once been open flesh. The memories were as vivid as if she were living them all over again; she could see the snake of saturated pink gauze she’d pulled out of his back by the meter, watch her gloved hand depress a syringe of morphine into his IV, hear her own murmurs of reassurance as she reached wrist-deep into the cavernous wounds to begin packing them again…
So, no. Nothing with wound care.
Anything on a neurology floor was likewise out of the question. The prospect of monitoring an EEG took her right back to the endless days and nights when those incomprehensible squiggling lines were burned into her retinas, watching for any change that might signify a seizure. The ICUs in general were out for that same reason. Just the sounds alone — the non-stop beeping of monitors and IVs, the whoosh of the ventilator and hiss of suction equipment—
She couldn’t.
Her damned glass face as she scrolled the job boards must have told her husband far more than she ever would have said aloud; it didn’t take long before she woke to find a folded newspaper on the kitchen table alongside her morning coffee. Circled once, with a question mark beside it, was an advertisement from a local primary care office in town, seeking a clinic nurse.
Claire looked over the top of the paper to find Jamie watching her apprehensively, as though unsure if he’d overstepped. The moment she caught his eye, he dropped his gaze and blew on his steaming coffee. “It’d be quieter than ye’re used to,” he said around a careful sip, “but somethin’ to consider, mebbe.”
Softening with tenderness, she reached for his hand across the table. “No, it’s—it’s a good thought. Thank you. Maybe I need the quiet, I don’t know.” With a sigh, she smoothed her free hand over her face and back into her hair. “That’s just it, I don’t… I don’t know what it is I want any more.” Peering up at her husband through her lashes, she admitted with a self-deprecating smile, “Suppose I’ve just been hoping I’ll know it when I see it.”
Returning the smile so that his soft morning eyes crinkled with it, Jamie brought her knuckles to his lips. “I’m sure you will. The right job’ll find ye when it’s meant to, Sassenach. I know it.”
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Through The Portal: Chapter 5
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Series Masterlist
Chapter Summary: Dipper learns more about Bill than what he bargained for. He also gets to know Y/n more than he thought. Stan mulls over his confession. Ford fights his own feelings for Y/n.
Pairing(s): Stan x reader, Ford x reader, Bill x reader, Mabel x friend!reader, Dipper x friend!reader
Warnings: Angst, Fluff, mentions of torture, PTSD, unrequited love, flashbacks, mentions of hopelessness.
A/N: The events and ideas are based on a theory I have about the Nightmare Realm. This is in no way canonically true, just my theories based on what we canonically know about the Nightmare Realm.
Dipper’s eyes widened at my words as I stated that Stan once lived with me. I no longer wanted to hide my past from the kids anymore, either way, they were going to find out. I had started to grow close with them and I felt terrible about hiding things from them. Having to tip-toe around their questions.
“How is that possible? Y-you look so young!?” Dipper pointed out.
“I may look young, Dipper, but where I was before I came out of the portal, time and gravity had no laws. Anything was possible. I’m actually around the same age as Ford and Stan, believe it or not.”
Dipper sat there with his jaw slacked, his mind filled with questions as they overlapped each other. I knew it was hard for him to wrap his mind around the thought I was the same age as his uncles. He sat there as his thoughts encouraged me to continue.
“After Stan was kicked out, I found him wandering the beach. He told me he was just living in his car and under good conscience I could not let him do that knowing I had a place for him. We grew close quickly. Then, when I got closer to getting what Bill wanted, I started pushing Stan away. Until, one day I was readying the machine for testing and got sucked inside. I had unspoken things I never got to tell Stan, and he did as well. He was angry he had no idea what happened to me.”
I was getting closer and closer to finally having everything I could ever ask for. Once my portal had passed the testing phase, I could finally give Stan everything he could ever want. I worked tirelessly on the machine, time passing as I became unaware of it.
“Y/n?” Stan’s voice echoed through the stairwell of the basement.
“Stan, what is it?”
“I made you dinner, it’s on the table if you want it.”
“Thanks. I’ll be up later to get it.”
“Y/n, what could possibly be so important down there that you can’t even walk up to get food?” Stan’s voice was concerned and worried.
I sigh, and stop what I’m doing. I head to the stairs where Stan is waiting at the top. I give him a soft smile as I make my way up to meet him. He gave a soft smile back as I met him at the landing.
“Okay. I’m sorry. I’m just trying to finish this project in time.”
“It’s okay, toots. I get it, but I want you to take care of yourself too.” Stan’s thumb rubbed my cheek bone gently.
I giggle and lean into his gentle touch. He was always so sweet to me, and I had to confess that I was growing more and more fond of him. Once I was finished with this invention, I wanted to dedicate the rest of my life to being with him.
“Growing close to him, aren’t we?” Bill’s voice echoed through my mind, “would be a shame if anything happened to him, wouldn’t it?”
“You wouldn’t dare!” I thought as Stan and I walked to the table.
“Get back to work, and I won’t hurt him. Besides, what happened to being mine? I don’t like sharing what’s mine!”
“Okay, okay. I’ll get back to work.”
“That’s my good girl.”
“I-I need to get back to work.” I state, grabbing my plate and rushing back downstairs, leaving Stan to wonder what just happened.
I worked harder than ever. Bill, peering over my shoulder now more than ever. He wanted to make sure I finished on time. Finally, the day came to prepare for testing, but something went wrong. I must have miscalculated as the gravity of the portal pulled me in. I gripped onto anything I could hold onto, but it was no use. I slowly slipped into the portal vanishing without a trace. I left Stan with so many questions, and an unspoken confession hanging on his mind.
“S-so Stan never knew what happened to you?” Dipper questioned softly.
I shook my head, “he must have thought I ran out on him. The last conversation I had with him, I bolted back to the basement as quickly as he got me out of there. Bill, he had a tight leash on me…he was obsessed.”
“D-do you know Ford’s connection with Bill?” Dipper asked, looking at a sleeping Ford.
“I don’t, sadly. He never shared that with me. He quickly found out mine, but it was hard to tell the connection he had.”
“Wh-what if we found out? Using this?” Dipper pointed to the helmet he was wearing that was reading his thoughts. 
His thoughts stated that there would be no harm, and we could help better. I took a deep breath and nodded in agreement. There was no harm, and Dipper then could help us defeat him. Dipper took the helmet off his head and walked over to Ford and placed it on Ford’s.
“Just a little peek. What are you hiding about Bill?” Dipper stated as he watched Ford’s thoughts appear on the screens.
Soon Bill’s image popped on the screen. His evil laugh echoed through the room. My body shivered hearing his laugh. I hated him so much, the things he did to me while laughing with that evil laugh of his.
More memories popped up. A new voice, one that belonged with whom I assumed was his assistant, and then Stan’s voice echoed through the room. Then Bill popped up again.
“He would trick or possess anyone,” Ford popped up, then a younger version of Ford popped up, “then it’s a deal, from now to the end of time.” He reached his hand out for a handshake.
Then Bill popped up again, his outstretched hand glowing with blue flames, “just let me into your mind Stanford.”
Their hands connected and shook as Ford spoke, “please, call me a friend.” Ford’s face appeared with Bill’s eyes, their voices intertwined as they laughed. I grew scared, was it possible for Bill to still have access to Ford's mind? “Ford and Bill!?” Dipper questioned in shock.
We turned around as Ford stood up. His eyes weren’t visible to us. I grew terrified as I realized that maybe Bill did still have access to Ford’s mind. Maybe that’s why he refused to erase my memory the other day. I had seeked refuge with someone still close to Bill, and that made me sick to my stomach.
“You shouldn’t have done that.” Ford spoke.
Dipper and I slowly back up. Ford takes the helmet off, throwing it on the ground and reveals his shrine of Bill. My eyes prick with tears as I grow terrified.
“Why were you shaking hands with Bill? You said Bill could possess anyone so he could get this!” Dipper grabs the rift, almost dropping it.
“Careful! Hand me the rift. Now boy!” Ford shouts.
I place a protective hand on Dipper’s shoulder as we slowly back up as Ford walks towards us. I was in a state of fear. I felt like the room was slowly morphing around me. Keeping a hand on Dipper kept me somewhat grounded in reality.
“Why are you really scanning my thoughts?” Dipper grabs the memory gun, “are you Bill right now?”
“Now just-just calm down, p…”
“Pine tree! Is that what you were going to call me!?” Dipper kept the memory gun pointed at Ford as we were backed up into the computer screens.
“I was going to say please, kid!”
“Great Uncle Ford told us to protect the rift! Get one step closer and I’ll shoot. I’ll erase you right out of Ford’s head!” Dipper’s voice kept my mind from slipping away from reality. I felt my legs trying to buckle at the thought that Bill could be possessing Ford right now. I wasn’t prepared to face him yet.
“It’s me Dipper! It’s your uncle! Y/n, sweetheart, help me out here?”
“Get out of Ford’s mind you triangular demon!” I screamed, Ford never allied me sweetheart, that was Bill talking, tears streamed down my face slowly as I looked away.
“Trust no one, trust no one. Trust..” Dipper heard my fear, and started to pull the trigger.
“Hand it to me!”
Dipper pulled the trigger of the memory gun. The beam bounced around the room, as we all ducked. My legs gave out as I no longer felt like I had a grip on reality. Ford picked Dipper up by his vest and adjusted his glasses. It was truly Ford standing there. It was too late for my mind to rationalize that now.
The world around me was morphing. The room slowly turned into the Nightmare realm as I slowly began to hear that evil laugh. I covered my ears as tears streamed down my face. I felt a pair of arms lift me up gently and Ford’s calming voice spoke.
“Bill’s gone. He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re safe with me dear.”
I started to calm down as my eyes opened slowly. I was no longer in the basement. I was in the room I had been staying in. Both Ford and Stan were standing there looking concerned. My eyes were still wet with tears as I slowly realized where I was.
“Hey ya, toots.” Stan spoke softly as my eyes landed on him.
Ford’s gaze turned from me to Stan as he spoke, “she’s been through a lot when she was in that portal, Stanley. This was the worst state I’ve seen her in.”
“Are you two going to tell me, or am I gonna be left in the dark here?” Stan looked at Ford with a stern look.
“She went through a lot that has caused trauma, post traumatic stress if you will. Her state of mind is always so fragile afterwards. The only way I’ve been able to get her out is to whisper that he’s gone, and she is safe.” Ford explained.
Stan came and sat down next to me, pulling me close, “I’m so sorry. I had no idea you had really been through so much.”
I curled into Stan, wanting anything to keep my mind from slipping back again. He cradled me gently, holding me there for as long as I needed him to. I had never realized the effect Bill truly had on me, but being in Stan’s arms made me feel a comfort I hadn’t known for a very long time.
“Th-thank you. Both of you.” I finally spoke up, my voice soft and hoarse. I must have been screaming.
“No need, toots. I’ve got you. I’ll always have you. No matter what.” I felt comforted by his words, but what he said next had my mind whirling, “I love you Y/n.”
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tokidokitokyo · 3 days
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恥を捨てて
Throw Away Your Shame
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When learning a new language, it's important to make mistakes.
I don't know about you, but the last thing I want to do is mess up in front of a native speaker of the language I am studying...
But, when I teach others English (my native language), I don't mind if they make mistakes.
So why am I so hard on myself? Why do I demand perfection of myself but accept less than perfection from others?
The answer to that may reveal some character flaws that I'm not willing to share yet, so we'll skip that and move on to: How can you be more forgiving to yourself when learning a language?
The first step is to try throwing away your shame and embracing the fact that you will make mistakes when practicing a new language. If someone who was learning your language spoke to you in a sentence with glaring mistakes, would you berate them in your mind? Or would you put the mistakes aside, appreciate their effort, and encourage them? (If the first, I'm not sure why you're learning a language yourself haha).
When I ran Japanese/English discussion groups with American and Japanese students, I learnt the phrase 恥を捨てる (haji o suteru) which means "to throw away your shame" (haji also means embarrassment but I like the feel of the word shame instead). I picked this phrase up, and started to use it during language exchange, especially with those who were just starting out. People who hadn't been learning either Japanese or English were overwhelmed with trying to pronounce a language very different than their own language, with different sounds and letters/characters and different grammar structures, and some of them were very shy and hesitant to make mistakes.
So I would just say, haji o sutete ne ("just throw away your shame, ok?"). And this usually helped them to relax because it's kind of funny and can be a good conversation starter. I also began repeating it to myself when I was practicing Japanese, essentially "faking it 'til I made it" because I am still scared of making dumb mistakes (even after more than 10 years).
So, if you are worried about making mistakes, it's okay, we all make mistakes. Even native speakers make mistakes. Most people don't care if you make mistakes (and if they do, why do you want to hang out with them?).
So go ahead and throw away your shame!
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| A Spike of Uncertainty |
tetsuro kuroo x f!reader
The first time Kuroo saw you was when he noticed you sitting with Kenma, happily playing video games together. He would have been lying if he said he wasn’t surprised when Kenma mentioned he had made a friend on the first day of the new school year. He didn’t share much about you, but Kuroo knew you had just transferred to Nekoma High and somehow you had piqued his interest.
warnings/notes: highschool romance, fluff, slight angst, I do NOT write fanfictions or storys normally, this is a first, so I am generally sorry for everything. CRINGE. def will be cringe in some parts. I'm a big sucker for Kuroo, him and Kenma may be ooc but I don't care this is my silly story and I just need to get it out of my head so I can finally write my Master's Thesis in peace. Also, english is not my first language. This has been "proofread" by my friends (who are also non-native speakers, enjoy).
word count: 1961
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“No way!” Kenma snatched Kuroo's DS from you the second you took it out of your bag. You wanted to protest, but before you could say anything, the Animal Crossing tune started playing, “I've been dying to see Kuro’s Village since we left elementary school.”
“Kenma, give it back,” you reached out to grab the DS, but Kenma effortlessly dodged, his eyes already glued to the screen. The familiar chimes of Animal Crossing filled the space between you two, and Kenma’s expression softened into one of pure focus. “I’ve been waiting for this moment,” he murmured, barely noticing your frustration. “Kuroo’s always bragged about his village, and I finally get to see it.” His fingers moved deftly across the buttons. But before Kenma could navigate from the menu into the game, you knew how he would react. He took a deep breath and sighed. You mentally prepared yourself for the look of disappointment on his face.
“You started a new game?” His voice was emotionless, even more so than usual. Normally, he would be glaring angrily at you right now, but he continued to stare blankly at the top screen.
“Kuroo said it was okay.” You tried to placate Kenma, but each of your excuses was just silently dismissed. Even your remarks about how unspectacular Kuroo's village was and how he hadn't missed anything couldn't appease him. Kenma's day, maybe this whole week, was ruined.
Before you could dwell on Kenma’s disappointment any longer, the classroom door slid open, and Kuroo's voice cut through the tense atmosphere. “Hey, you two ready?” He strolled in, his usual confident grin plastered on his face. Kenma barely looked up from the DS, still brooding over the lost village.
Kuroo noticed the device in Kenma’s hands and chuckled. “Let me guess, you’re mad because Y/N-Chan wiped out my Animal Crossing legacy?” Kenma gave a slight nod, but Kuroo just shrugged it off. “No worries, Kenma. You’ve got bigger things to focus on now, like making sure we crush it at practice today.”
Kuroo turned his attention to you, his grin softening. “Glad you’re coming to watch us. We could use a good luck charm on the sidelines after the training break.” There was a slight blush creeping up his neck, and you felt your own cheeks warm in response.
“I’m just here to make sure you don’t slack off, Kuroo,” you teased back, trying to ignore the flutter in your chest.
“Is that so?” Kuroo leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a mock-serious tone. “I’ll have to make sure I show off a bit, after all. Don’t want to disappoint our special guest.”
Kenma finally tore his gaze from the DS, rolling his eyes at the exchange. “Can we just go already?”
“Right, right,” Kuroo said, straightening up but sending you one last playful wink. “Let’s get going.” Together, you left the classroom and made your way to practice.
After the two boys had changed, you entered the gym with them. Some of the boys on the court turned around curiously as you walked in. Kuroo raised a hand in greeting but kept his pace brisk, leading you straight to the others. “Hey guys,” he called out, a slight edge in his voice, “this is Y/N, Kenma's new classmate. She’s watching today.”
All eyes were on you now, and you could feel a slight wave of nervousness creeping in. Before you could fully process it, a small boy with a friendly smile broke away from the group and approached you. “Hey, nice to meet you! I’m Yaku,” he said, extending his hand warmly. “Don’t worry, we don’t bite.”
You smiled shyly, about to reply, but Kuroo quickly stepped forward, a subtle frown crossing his face as he swiftly pulled you away from Yaku. “Come on, Y/N-Chan, I’ll introduce you to the rest,” he said, his tone a bit more forceful than before. As he led you around, you could sense a slight tension in his posture.
The rest of the introductions went smoothly, and everyone greeted you with smiles, clearly welcoming you warmly despite not actually being part of the team. However, you couldn’t help but notice the way Kuroo’s gaze flickered back to Yaku more than once, his irritation barely hidden.
“You can sit over there,” Kuroo pointed to the bleachers, his voice softening again as he directed you. “That’s the best place to see everything.” And with everything he mainly meant himself.
“And if you have any questions, just let me know!” Yaku called out with a grin as he started to warm up with the others.
Kuroo shot a quick glance in Yaku’s direction, a slight crease forming between his brows before he turned back to you. “Just relax and enjoy the show,” he said, though his smile seemed a bit tighter than before.
Despite the slight tension, you immediately felt more comfortable. The guys were all nice and open, and it was clear they were a strong team that supported each other.
“Y/N, want to practice a few passes with me?” Yaku ran up to you after a few minutes with a ball in his hand, “we're an odd number of players and I thought just watching would get boring.” On any other team you would agree with Yaku, but here you had a good opportunity to watch Kuroo for a longer time without it being weird. Nevertheless, you accepted the offer with a smile. It felt good to be actively involved in the group.
The passes that Yaku tossed to you were pretty easy but you didn’t complain, he probably didn't want to overwhelm you. Besides, you were still able to look over at Kuroo a few times, who was practicing with Kenma and seemed to be talking to him on the side. “You're pretty good,” Yaku praised you after a few rallies. “Thanks, my friends at my old school actually played volleyball too. They always persuaded me to train, a bit like Kuroo and you now, although they hit much rougher balls than you do.”
Every now and then, Kuroo would give you a look, as if to make sure you were having fun. And every time you returned his gaze, you felt a slight tingle. Contrary to your expectations Kuroo was actually looking at you and Yaku because he wanted to make sure you weren't having too much fun with the Libero. “Man, I wish I'd gotten the idea of practicing with Y/N-chan.” He clasped his hands behind his head and Kenma's pass flew right over him.
“I didn't think I'd ever have to tell you this but Kuro... Focus.” Annoyed, Kenma went to fetch the ball only to hit it over his inattentive captain's head again immediately afterwards.
“I don't get it, she's not even his type.” You were in fact not Yakus type but he saw the opportunity to unsettle Kuroo and took it.
“Then you don't have to worry about it.” Kenma sighed, retrieved the ball and started to serve, but stopped in motion. He mustered a glance at Kuroo, who was still staring over at you and Yaku, clearly distracted. He couldn’t remember the last time he had seen his captain so unsure during practice, especially over something—or rather, someone—like this. Usually, Kuroo was the one pulling the team together, his sharp eyes always on the game, on strategy. But now? Now, he was missing passes that even first-years wouldn’t let slip by.
Kenma sighed internally. “I told you you'd be annoying about it,” he muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Kuroo to hear.
Kuroo snapped his attention back to Kenma, blinking as if coming out of a daze. “What do you mean? I’m not being annoying.”
“You're not? You’re letting balls fly right past you,” Kenma pointed out dryly. “And you keep staring at Y/N like she’s going to disappear if you don’t.”
Kuroo rubbed the back of his neck, a sheepish grin forming on his face. “I’m just... making sure she’s comfortable, you know? It's her first time here with us. Gotta be a good captain.”
Kenma rolled his eyes, his usual indifferent tone laced with a hint of sarcasm. “Yeah, sure. That's what this is about.”
Kuroo dropped his hand, letting out a small huff. “I just didn’t expect to see her getting along with Yaku so easily, okay? It’s... different.”
“You’re overthinking it,” Kenma said, tossing the ball lightly at Kuroo. “She’s here, she’s having fun. And she’s not going anywhere, unless you keep acting weird and scare her off.”
Kuroo caught the ball, looking at it for a second before letting out a small laugh. “You’re right, I’m being ridiculous.”
Kenma gave a rare, almost imperceptible smile. “Yeah, you are. Now, I never thought I would say this, but can we please get back to practice?”
Kuroo nodded, the tension easing out of his shoulders. He tossed the ball back to Kenma, a more focused look settling on his face. “Alright, let’s do this. No more distractions.”
Kenma gave him a final, pointed look before serving the ball. “Good. And maybe try not to look like a lost puppy for the rest of the day.”
Kuroo chuckled, positioning himself for the next pass. “I’ll try my best.”
With that, the easy rhythm of their movements returned as Kuroo finally managed to push his thoughts aside. He couldn’t help but glance over at you one last time, just to see you smile as you hit another one of Yaku’s passes. But this time, when he looked back at Kenma, he was met with a raised eyebrow that clearly said, Focus.
In the two weeks since that first practice, you’d found yourself at the gym nearly every day. What started as an excuse to hang out with Kenma and Kuroo had quickly become routine—afternoons spent watching practice, evenings split between studying with Kuroo or gaming with Kenma. It felt natural, like you’d always been part of their rhythm.
One evening, after the team had left, you and Kenma sat outside on a bench, waiting for Kuroo to finish his meeting with the coaches. Kenma, having switched from his PSP to an old DS—thanks to you snagging Kuroo’s—was quietly immersed in another game. The only sounds were the occasional soft beeps from the device or the quiet laugh you’d share when one of you messed up. It was a peaceful kind of waiting, the murmur of voices from the gym a distant background to your silence.
Kenma didn’t say much, as usual, but every now and then he’d glance at you out of the corner of his eye, as if he knew something was on your mind.
When Kuroo finally emerged, he looked directly at Kenma, who hadn’t even noticed his best friend approaching. “We’re going on a trip next week. Coach Nekomata has organized a training match with a team from a high school in Miyagi. Karasuno, I think.”
You nearly choked on your iced tea when Kuroo mentioned the name, startled out of your thoughts. Fortunately, he didn’t notice, too focused on Kenma as he rambled about old rivals, crows, cats, and a ‘dumpster battle.’ You weren’t sure if you’d heard correctly or if the choking had thrown off your hearing, but it all sounded a bit dramatic.
Kenma’s gaze slowly shifted to you, his eyebrows narrowing slightly in thought. “Miyagi? Isn’t that your former prefecture, Y/N?”
As Kenma said your name, Kuroo finally turned to look at you too. Your throat still tickled from the sugary drink, so you just nodded, pressing your lips together.
“Is it?” Kuroo teased with a grin. “Wouldn’t it be funny if you went to Karasuno?”
You managed a nervous smile, “Yeah, wouldn’t that be funny?”
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tellmegoodbye · 16 hours
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Hello everyone,
Happy LONE STAR DAY!!
I have a few housekeeping things to talk about before I return to our usual Music Monday format, but I know we're all excited for tonight so I will try to keep this brief.
If you would like to check out our playlist for the countdown event you can find that here.
Since we are getting new episodes now, I thought it would be a cool idea for a new way to participate in the tag. If you have a song that you relate to the new episodes, share them with us!
Please continue to refer to this post for any new Music Monday info, or if you just need a refresher on how the tag works.
Here's a quick overview of what Music Monday is for those of you who are new here. You share your songs that you relate to the show, its characters, storylines, fanfics, etc. All songs are added to their respective playlists and your explanations are added to the docs I have created for each playlist.
Reminder: Make sure to either tag me in your posts OR you can use the 911ls music mondays tag so that I can find and reblog your contributions.
Okay, now that we've got that out of the way, onto my songs for the week!
---
Leave Out All The Rest - Linkin Park
I dreamed I was missing You were so scared But no one would listen Cause no one else cared After my dreaming I woke with this fear What am I leaving When I'm done here?
Don't be afraid I've taken my beating I've shared what I've made I'm strong on the surface Not all the way through I've never been perfect But neither have you So, if you're asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes Forget the wrong that I've done Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed And don't resent me And when you're feeling empty Keep me in your memory Leave out all the rest
This song is a reflection on the way we live our lives and how we will be remembered when we're gone. When I think about these lyrics in the context of Lone Star, they could really apply to any character, but Gabriel is who specifically comes to my mind for this song.
To me, this is Gabriel's message to Carlos. He's spent a lot of time reflecting on his own mistakes and has struggled to express the love he has for his son, but he hopes that Carlos will remember him as someone who never stopped trying and who always strived to be better. He didn't always get it right, but he looks at Carlos and feels so much love and pride, and he wants Carlos to know that and to see that.
Zzyzx Rd. - Stone Sour
Propped up by lies and promises Saving my place as life forgets Maybe it's time I saw the world
I'm only here for a while But patience is not my style And I'm so tired that I gotta go
What am I supposed to hide now? What am I suppose to do? Did you really think I wouldn't see this through Tell me I should stick around for you Tell me I could have it all I'm still too tired to care and I gotta go
I'm over existing in limbo I'm over the myths and placebos I don't really mind if I just fade away
I'm ready to live with my family I'm ready to die in obscurity 'Cause I'm so tired that I gotta go
This is a song written from the perspective of someone struggling with addiction. The narrator addresses his loved ones with a sort of brutal honesty about his feelings towards life, but it's also a song about love and support at the same time. It's about someone who is there for you even when you're in your worst moments and can't see a way out.
This song reminds me of TK and Owen in s1. Owen is ready to do whatever he has to do in order to help TK, and TK lets him in as much as he can, but these lyrics are also an realistic viewpoint on the state of his mental health in the aftermath of his suicide attempt. He knows Owen loves him and is there for him, but he still needs to find that healing outside of that support.
Impossible - Nothing But Thieves
Love, it stings and then it laughs At every beat of my battered heart A sudden jolt, a tender kiss I know I'm gonna die of this And that's because
I could drown myself in someone like you I could dive so deep I never come out I thought it was impossible But you make it possible
I'll take the smooth with the rough Feels so fucked up to be in love Another day, another night Stuck in my own head but you pull me out You pull me out
I really hit y'all with a couple angsty gems today, so I should probably round this post out with a more upbeat song. This song screams Tarlos to me, and reminds me of the early days of their relationship where everything is new and overwhelming, but it also just feels right at the same time. They've come to that realization that what they have is something special, and that they might have found their soulmate. Before they met, such a notion felt impossible to them.
@strandnreyes @lemonlyman-dotcom @bonheur-cafe @heartstringsduet @herefortarlos
Tags!
@eclectic-sassycoweyes @literateowl @carlos-tk @paperstorm @guardian-angle22
@ironheartwriter @emsprovisions @sapphic--kiwi @whatsintheboxmh @firstprince-history-huh
@nancys-braids @captain-gillian @alrightbuckaroo @theghostofashton @sweettkstrand
@toomanycupsoftea @corsage @certifiedflower @goldenskykaysani @reeeallygood
+ open tag
please tell me if you would like to be added/removed from my tag list
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bad268 · 3 days
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Actually obsessed with your Arvid stories omd!!!!!!! They're too cute
Could you do one about reader being a part of prema and in challenges and vids there is a lot of moments between them and fans catch onto that
+Heyyyy
The arvid stories are way too good omd ur writing>>
Anyways had a request for him if that's okay, arvid and the guys are in some prema promo vid (Dino and them) and they start teasing him about girls or smth and he's like "I don't think my gf would appreciate that" and them and the fans are shocked
What Are The Odds? (Arvid Lindblad X Prema! Reader)
Fandom: RPF/F2/F3
Requested: Clearly (hope yall don't mind I combined this <3)
Warnings: Aged up Arvid
POV: Second Person (You/your/She/her)
W.C. 1276
Summary: What are the odds?
As always, my requests are OPEN
MASTERLIST // HITLIST
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~~(^Pinterest)
You and Arvid were like a package deal. You met in the Italian F4 championship and went through your entire F4 careers together. You two were the youngest F3 drivers, and now, you were in F2. This time, for the first time, you were teammates at Prema. 
That being said, fans of you two always searched for crumbs of interactions between you. It was pretty difficult because even though you were friends (publically), you were always on different teams, and you two preferred to hang out in the privacy of your shared apartment. Your lives are already so public that you wanted a sliver of it to be behind closed doors. No one could blame you, but the fans made it clear they wanted more. This also didn't stop your friends from making sly comments during videos.
Back in F3, Dino made it his mission to constantly tease Arvid mainly because he thought you two were cute. They were paired together for the Taylor Swift or Shakespeare challenge, and Dino really amped up the teasing.
“Do you think Taylor Swift would ever give you a chance?” Dino joked before they even started the challenge. 
“Uh, I don’t think my girlfriend would appreciate that,” Arvid dragged out before he thought about it for a second. “Actually, she probably wouldn’t care because she loves Taylor Swift.”
When that video went live, you immediately texted him that he better not get with Taylor Swift, and he responded, saying he was going with the bit. Honestly, the fans didn’t want to believe he had a girlfriend because they shipped you two so much. Little did they know. 
When you both were announced to take the places of Kimi and Ollie, the fans didn’t hide their excitement. They knew Prema was known for their challenges, and they were practically begging Angelina in the Instagram comments to pair you two up. Luckily, Angelina read most of the comments, and she already planned for you to be partnered going forward. 
The first video was a “How well do you know your teammate” challenge. Easy peasy for you two right?
“What is my family heritage?” All went downhill immediately. 
“You started off difficult for a reason!” You accused, pretending to throw your cards at Arvid.
“That was the first card!” He defended, using his own cards to shield his face. 
“Well, I know you’re British, duh,” You deadpanned to the camera, “You’re dad is Swedish I think, so Swedish. Is there another?”
“Yeah, technically one more,” Arvid smiled at you as he nodded along with you.
“I don’t know where your mum is from. I thought she was British.”
“She is, but her parents are from India.” 
“Damn, I could’ve guessed that,” You laughed as you looked at your first card. The plan was t alternate between the two of you. “What is my favorite warm-up?”
“Jumping rope,” Arvid said immediately, snapping toward you.
“No,” You responded just as quickly. “I hate jumping rope. You should know this.”
“Is it the tennis balls or good mornings then?” Arvid gave up.
“Neither,” You gasped, honestly horrified that he gave up so quickly. You held your cards out in front of you as you turned them much like you would with your wheel. “It's the wheels.”
“I should’ve known!” He shouted, smacking a hand against his forehead. “I’m sorry I don’t know you.”
“You should know me at least a little given the circumstances,” You jokingly lectured.
“When’s my birthday?” Arvid got back on track.
“You should've started with this!” You exclaimed, throwing your hands up before pointing at him. “The eighth of August, 2007.”
“I shouldn’t doubt you when it comes to remembering dates,” Arvid chuckled quietly to himself.
“Now, what is my worst habit?” You eyed him suspiciously, trying to communicate with him to not say anything weird.
“Well, you take forever to wake up in the morning,” Arvid started with a laugh. “You’re always late.”
“I wouldn’t say that’s all my fault! My bed is just so comfy!” You gushed leaning further into your chair, imagining it being your bed. “Yeah, I could go for a nap right now.”
“I think that’s the end of the video then,” Arvid laughed as he wrapped it up quickly, so you two could go home.
When the video dropped, you did not expect the influx of messages and comments. They were generally saying that Arvid should break up with his girlfriend or that you two should be together. One comment on the Instagram post said, “what are the odds they're already together” and you ran with it. You talked about it together and decided it was finally time to announce your relationship.
You screenshotted the comment and took a picture with Arvid. You two were leaning your foreheads together smirking, and you shared that picture with the screenshotted comment to your story. You laid down on Arvid’s lap as you gave everyone a minute to freak out before posting another picture of you laying with Arvid with the caption, “what are the odds?”
The next video was going to be interesting. In true Angelina fashion, she started planning the perfect challenge for you.
“Hello everybody! I’m Y/n, and that’s Arvid,” You introduced, gesturing for Arvid to continue the start of the video.
“And we’re playing the Mr and Mrs game,” Arvid explained all of the rules as you nodded along. When he wrapped up, you played rock paper scissors to see who would listen to music first. He won, so he put the headphones on while Angelina asked you the questions.
“What is Arvd’s favorite track?”
“Silverstone,” You answered immediately, “Man is more patriotic than an American.” You looked back at Arvid and gestured for him to come forward. He took the headphones off and wheeled his chair over to you again. “What’s your favorite circuit?”
“Silverstone,” Arvid said immediately, and he was going to go into a tangent, but you cut him off.
“What did I say? I knew it!” You exclaimed with a laugh as you poked his cheek, “You’re just too British.”
“Ok, I’m going back under now,” Arvid muttered, embarrassed at all of the attention being caught on camera. He put the headphones back on and wheeled back, nodding his head to the music playing.
You continued with a few different questions ranging from racing topics to favorite foods and dream holiday destinations. When you got the the end of the list of Arvid’s questions, you swapped.
“What was Y/n’s racing number in karting?”
“How am I supposed to know that?” Arvid argued. “I didn’t even know her then!”
“She knew your heritage, so you should at least know their karting number.”
“1?” Arvid answered with a question as he looked back, beckoning you to come forward. “What was your karting number?”
“What did you say?” You teased. You never told him what it was, so you wanted to see what he said.
“1,” Arvid answered simply.
“What are the odds you didn’t know that?” You teased lightly, “So, it’s actually a trick question. I didn’t have a single racing number since I got handed down karts. Generally, my numbers were 17, 25, 99, and 33. In F4, I chose (#) as my racing number though.”
“How was I ever going to get that?” Arvid said in disbelief as he shook his head. “You’re done. We’re done. This has been the Mr and Mrs game.”
“And clearly this Mr doesn’t know his Mrs, but we’ll settle that later,” You cut in before Arvid could completely wrap the video up. “We’ll see you on the track or in the next video. Bye!”
~~~~~
© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.
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iamanartichoke · 1 year
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but as a creator -
I am fine with "the audience" -
downloading my fics
printing my fics
copy/pasting or screenshotting my fics
sharing your saved copy of my fics with anyone else who might want them in the unlikely but never impossible case that my fics are no longer available on ao3
making a book of my fic(s) and running your fingers across the pages while lovingly whispering my precioussss
doing these things with anything I create for fandom, such as meta, headcanons, au nonsense like 'texts from the brodinsons,' etc
I am not fine with "the audience"
doing any of the above with the purpose/intent of plagiarizing my work or passing it off as their own in any capacity
feeding my work into ai for any reason whatsoever
Save the fandom things. Preserve the fandom things. Respect the fandom things.
Enjoy the fandom things.
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widevibratobitch · 4 months
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something about being told im 'the leading person at this whole academy when it comes to interpretation and stage intelligence' by the husband of the woman im trying (not really. but i mean. who knows) to seduce... ok boy you got me. lets make it a polycule.
#im playing it all cool and funny now but atm i legit burst into tears lol#like he said i have a 'good voice too of course' but i know realistically that is not my strongest asset#and even if i were technically perfect. which im NOT lol. the voice itself is just nothing special. it's there ig but that's about it#but its nice to know i may not be 100% useless after all#(just 90%)#also apparently the most feared and respected professor who came to the concert said. again. that he likes me the most.#which again. crying real actual tears about this all rn this means literally the world to me this is everything i have#and i have no one to share this with because im not gonna say it to my uni friend cause i dont want her to feel like im boasting or sth#(even tho she has no such qualms herself but probably because i know how. not great. it feels when someone keeps talking about themselves#and about how great they are and how easy everything is for them. i dont wanna do it back at her.#well there's also the fact that i dont think im great and this is not fucking easy to me at all lol#but idk i think the difference between us is that she actually admitted she sees no point in singing if she cant show off (thus she hates#the duet we're singing because she sings the lower part and cant show off her high notes or coloratura.#which is like. an insane take to me. i mean it i get it. kinda. if i had a voice like hers maybe id be like that too fuck knows.#but that just feels so. idk. sad to me. so self obsessed and empty. like you dont care about the music itself? about you being a part of it?#also immediately made singing with her not fun anymore. i thought we were creating something TOGETHER. but thanks for the confirmation#that you only really care about being 'better than'. yikes.#like idk this behaviour is funny and iconic in old school opera legends like yes go bite each others dicks off.#but it hits completely different when it's your own colleague let alone your friend. like damn girl. damn)#) anyway. the husband is kinda hot too now that i think of it. i really should seduce them both.#except its realistically not possible since they've both seen me cry now (she saw it like a hundred times lol)#so ive lost the hot and mysterious card alas. no uni professors romance for me
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wikipedie · 2 years
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grief is like a really ugly couch
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I think grief is like a really ugly couch. It never goes away. You can decorate around it; you can slap a doily on top of it; you can push it to the corner of the room—but eventually, you learn to live with it. ― Jodi Picoult, Leaving Time
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#the mentalist#quotes#patrick jane#i would say web weaving but there's not a lot of web weaving happening#initially I also had a bit of an essay accompanying this but it disappeared because of a tumblr glitch + my own stupidity#and i'm too tired to write it prettily but i still wanna write it so it'll be in the tags#a cute little fun surprise for whoever cares about and reads tags#so i made a different post talking about jane's grief but i was upset i didn't have enough space for the couch (pun unintended)#and i was thinking this morning about this quote and jane's couch and how it could be interpreted as a physical manifestation of his grief#as well as his willingness to open up to people#1. i love grief; grief is important to me. grief is permanent and i have been aware of grief in a form of another (in my own personal life)#for a very very very long time. so to see it in this show is...significant to me. i cherish this#now onto the actual analyzing. of course they never intended the couch to be a symbol for grief; but it becomes so.#he leans on the couch when he opens the Red John files; for support most likely - and it's a beginning of the process of dealing with grief#he is the only one who uses the couch. everyone knows it as jane's couch#in S4E23 Cho uses it briefly to rest and Rigsby asks him if Jane knows he's using his couch#Erica tries briefly (also in S4) to sit on the couch but he doesn't allow her the space#in fact the only two people we see that use the couch are Teresa Lisbon and Dennis Abbott#and this is the part about emotional availability. he only shares the couch with people whom he trusts#With Lisbon twice even#the couch is grief and the couch is love; the couch is support#there's nostalgia for the CBI times but there's also more to it#and that quote makes me go absolutely feral because#'eventually you learn to live with it' 😭 eventually you learn to live with grief and eventually you learn to accept it as part from yself#andand he is happy to see the couch; he missed the couch#-> you are not free from your grief but in healing you learn that it's okay; you cherish your grief; it was there with you and for you#yea anyways i will never not go mad about grief and trauma and how it's portrayed and handled.#and i already have 2 more sorta-proper essays that i want to write on the topic asdgfhdhjk. yea i'm literally not gonna stop
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Please BE EXCITED about stuff you like/ want to be excited about 💞 That's what life supposed to be about, finding joy in the smallest things, in the things we enjoy and love. And the people that judge us for having that joy in our hearts lose their own life, because they spend too much time judging someone else's life instead of doing something with their own. FUCK them
this is one of my favorite asks and i love you
#nobody will ever stop me from getting excited about things i like#i just always feel like i'm not allowed to share that excitement with anybody directly because of being made fun of in the past#or like i at least have to tone it down by like 99% and make it very brief#because of fear of rejection so i keep it to myself contained in my own space#sometimes i really wanna talk about my favorite things with somebody but i'm like#'nobody knows or cares about this. what if i send something and they hate it and tell me it's horrible'#(a reaction i've been the most used to. either that or just silence)#and i wouldn't know who would actually be interested or if i would be putting them in a situation#where they're not interested at all but they're too nice to say it and then i feel annoying if i keep talking about it#because now even if it isn't SAID that they hate it i still always feel like people are thinking that behind it all#so like if somebody came at me right now telling me everything i like is horrible#that itself wouldn't really bother me because i could just block and continue life without a second thought about that person specifically#because that's just unnecessary and rude regardless of what it's about and i would assume it's just somebody looking to stir things up#delete/block. not taking it personally and not worth thinking about#but it's the anxiety built up from it happening for so long and so consistently from so many people and some that i used to be close to#that now it feels to me that everybody feels that way even if i know LOGICALLY that it isn't true. the feeling is still there#it's one of the long-term effects that are so hard to get rid of once they're set#this is just another thing about myself to work on for probably my entire life#but russ has been helping me with so much lately it's unbelievable
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g0thsoojin · 2 months
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🦴
#im like very much having a crisis right now... i mean to most ppl it isnt that serious lmaoooo#but tbh i am a loser and tumblr is 80% of my life and most of my social life#all social interactions i get are on tumblr ._.#so i dont want to keep alienating myself on it because then im just ruining it for myself and removing the only place#and source of social interaction and attention :/#i personally can not for my life comprehend this because i really dont take other peoplës venting personally#but ever since i started using twitter and tumblr i have ruined so many connections .. by venting on my own account.....#and now.. when i lost and fucked it up with the love of my life... just bc i vented and he interpreted it from his pov..#and got hurt when i wrote things abt being lonely and unwanted WHILE talking to him everyday and having him call me beautiful and care abt m#... i understand why he got hurt and i understand his pov bc it looked like i pulled away and distanced myself and only complained and that#he didnt matter to me when in fact he was EVERYTHING to me and i lived off his attention#i hate that i ruined the best thing i could ever have just bc i have this pathological need to share my every thought#like shut the fuck up... i wish i wouldve shut the fuck up and instead gushed abt how much i liked him which was what i wanted to do#my avpd just made me feel stupid bc when i did he didnt interact with those posts and then i felt embarrassed#which like i know how fucking stupid avpd and bpd makes me and i hate it but i cant stop it#god i regret it so much like my dumb ass blog isnt worth losing him over... it just isnt#only an online connection.. makes it so hard to see bc he only saw my diary where i complain he didnt see everything else :(((#so he thought that he wasnt important to me and then slowly started to detach himself from me (understandably) god i wanna die#so yeah ive started to HATE my main account. bc it has ruined so much for me. plus lately ppl have started being mean#and i get it its the internet ppl suck but i AM so fkn sensitive. and i get sad and hurt really easily#and i feel anxious abt venting bc im scared of getting a mean ask after#like... i feel so fucking alone and idk what to do. all i want to do now is vent vent vent but ive started to feel like venting is bad#and harmful and only ruins my friendships and connections and makes ppl be mean to me#i honestly wish i wouldve stopped venting every thought looooong ago#and that i had a more normal blog and had a secret vent blog and that he didnt read all my miserable posts#bc then maybe.... he wouldve actually understood how much i fkn love him and hadnt looked in other places and now i lost him#bc i really dont blame him bc i know what he is struggling with and seeing me who he cares for so much say those things...#i get it 100% and thats why im so pissed with myself for just not stopping!!!! why cant i stop????? whats wrong with me#i just feel so lonely and like no ones listening but he was listening to me i just had to be brave and go to him#plus all my venting made him think that im like in severe emotional distress every second and that i was too fragile to talk to
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r0semultiverse · 7 months
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A “queer cop” is an oxymoron (a self contradiction). Being a cop is a direct contradiction to being queer. You can be LBGTIA+, but if you’re a cop, you’ll never be the Q. Queerness doesn’t associate itself with the state’s violence, it opposes it.
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gibbearish · 5 months
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am finally back home and can say without a doubt that i am just fundamentally not built for long distance travel however the train was much nicer than planes
#that being said. pressurized cabins drive me insane a little bit#and also it gives you pretty intense sea legs for a While#like. the ones from the first trip hadnt gone away by the return one. so. might be stuck with that for a few days#we shall see#also ajr live fucks severely#the albums were already incredible but that was a goddamn religious experience#like. idk the way i think abt it is theyre more djs than a regular band esp w their performance showing the making of way less sad#like their music is very electronic‚ theyre making mixes of their own sound effects more than singing in one go#so like. the vocals were a teeensy bit rough at times#notably times it has taken me Literally Hundreds Of Hours Practice to be able to consistently sing along with#and times ive found its literally physically impossible to like. no matter what#idc how big your lungs are‚ there is no human on earth who can do that final run of karma in one breath#much less to An Entire Stadium After An Hour Of Jumping And Dancing And Singing Loud As Fuck#so like i dont blame them for that‚ you dont go to live shows expecting it to be 100% perfect anyways jwbdjsbfksb#the trumpet however. well she was certainly playing sometimes. and was very enthusiastic about her flares.#however. in most of their songs they use midi trumpets to my ear at least#meaning she was likely an addition specifically for live performances and in my personal band kid opinion#prooobably was not in any of the like. higher tier bands? idk just. a lot of the mistakes she was making were hitting as stuff that got#taught out of us the instant we joined any band beyond regular concert#so i would guess she was probably just like. a friend who happened to play trumpet in high school or maybe even just middle school#and they knew that the trumpet parts in their pieces were big and distinct enough that like they /had/ to get a live player#and just kinda. didnt anticipate the audition -> performance gap#like. her tone was really fried the whole time like she was playing as hard as possible#which. she was mic'd. have the sound guy turn her up.#the way they did it made it sound like she was using a mute but not. like she only got the bad parts of a mute from it yknow#her tempo and timing were. bad. theres no nice way to put that one it just Was Bad‚ like the trumpet runs in ajr songs arent. complicated#like. quite literally if you handed me the sheet music right now i would have it down perfect in a week at absolute most#and better than that player on sightread. like. we did so many sightreading drills.#like ill share my band kid creds if anyone cares but i need to emphasize this isnt me being braggy like. they genuinely just arent hard#fuck im out of tags. w/e i think only like one of yall also listens to them anyways so i can leave it there
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transgender-catboy · 1 year
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I'M BACK, LOOK AT THIS MAN!!!!
#god#GOD#...#breathing...#breeeaathiinggg#👁️👁️#i. am fighting the urge to draw him...um.#ehe#....... i shan't say#i mean. i might. it's just gonna take a minute to get there so expect a wall of tags#teehee :3c#okayokayokay let me ramble for a minute... okay. so. peeb? you see him. he's right there. he's beautiful.#let's talk about him. but like not coherent thought because I'm so head over heels that i can't even think straight#(also because I'm a raging homosexual. ain't nothin straight about my infatuation)#his hair? im jealous. i wish my hair was that effortlessly nice. but. he'd totally use that like 76-in-one shampoo conditioner body wash#at least when he was living on his own. man was not practicing self care and that was visible by him sitting in the shower in his suit.#mood peeb. i understand.#good god. uh. whoa okay. that made me think of somethin gay#i... wanna draw him and widow sharing a comforting bath#the kind where one is gently washing the others hair. massaging shampoo into their scalp. the poor sap damn near nodding off in the tub#false widow and tragedy would be so kind to him (⁠ ⁠;⁠∀⁠;⁠) thats why I'm making a peeb for them#he's not gonna be a spider. idk what he's gonna be yet. maybe a high school teacher#and widow has/had a sibling that went there and they became friends from him always picking them up from school#AH#okay okay being gay now#cuddles? thinkin about it again. but I think mayhaps sometimes he'd like to be little spoon#someone needs to hold that man and i would be more than happy to step up to the plate#oh also have i mentioned how i love that he doesn't have perfectly straight teeth? yeah. happy about that#little details just make me love him nore#more*
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