#Miki's hand holding collection

[crispywizardtale]

Low quality gifs of this softess hand hold ever I am beyond devastated

Bonus with my reaction

[sunlightandsuffering]

Bro this is just me being mean now. 😂😂

“Best you’ve ever had?” Eren states lewdly to the group and Jean’s face scrunches up in disgust, leave it to Eren to be so inappropriate. At Jean’s look Eren shrugs, holding his hands up, “I haven’t seen you fuckers in a year, let me at least have some guy talk Kirstchein.” Jean sighs, shaking his head and allowing the rest of the members of their group to go first, Armin meekly stating that obviously it was Annie, Connie naming some girl he met up with last week that was apparently more flexible than he could believe. “What about you Yeager?” Jean asks before they can get to his turn, wanting to avoid the topic if possible. Eren shrugs, “Miki.” Everyone collectively groans and Eren huffs, “She’s fucking real I promise.” “Yeah, yeah whatever Yeager you used to talk about her all the time and yet we’ve never met her.” Eren scoffs, “What about you then Kirschtein, give me a good story to top my imaginary one.” 

Jean shrugs, “I don’t have one yet, and unlike you brutes I’d honestly prefer not to share anyway.” “What about that girl you’re seeing?” Connie pipes up over his beer and Eren head swivels towards him, those green eyes penetrating and Jean knows he’ll be forced to answer. He does so primly, keeping his answers evasive, “Her name is Mikasa and I’ll have you know she’s a virgin, we haven’t done anything yet.” 

“How do you know?” Connie volleys back and Jean glares at his friend, how dare he question Mikasa’s virtue. “I just do okay, she’s not that type of girl.”

“What’s her last name?” Eren asks, some dark hint of satisfaction in his voice, eyes gleaming with mirth and Jean frowns, why does Yeager even need to know? “Ackerman, Mikasa Ackerman.” Eren chuckles darkly, “She’s not a virgin Jean, promise.” There are shocked gasps but Jean glares murderously at his old friend, he should have known Eren hasn’t changed, still the same old asshole he’d been before he’d left on that exchange trip last semester. 

“Don’t tell me Eren you’ve–” Jean cuts Armin off before he can get the words out, “No way, Mikasa would never, she’s a good girl, she wouldn’t be caught dead with the likes of you Yeager.” The smile on Eren’s face is all teeth, wolfish, “Yeah, she is a good girl, I promise you that.” Jean stands, to do what? He’s not sure, maybe to hit him, embroiled with so many emotions as he insults the girl Jean’s been seeing for two months. 

What a douchebag. 

“Why don’t you call her up? We can ask.” “I will!” He finds her contact, nervously hitting the call button, hoping to god this doesn’t ruin his chances with her, doesn’t set back everything he’s worked for. But he just can’t help it, wants to wipe that smug grin right off of Eren’s face, wants to come out on top for once. 

The phone dials for a few moments before it’s ringing and then the next thing he knows Mikasa’s voice is sleepy in his ear, “Hello?” He’s about to respond when the phone is snatched from his grip, Eren eagerly bringing it up to his lips as he hits the speaker button. “Mikasa,” He sings, his voice teasing and the entire group listens with rapt attention to hear Mikasa’s reaction. There is a gasp on the other line and then a very breathless whisper, “Eren?” Eren’s smile widens impossibly, self-satisfaction dripping from him as he shoots Jean a wink, “Yeah baby it’s me.” “Oh- I umm- when did you get back?” It’s clear she’s nervous and this is so not the Mikasa he’s used to, the confident uncaring girl that had barely let him take her on a date. She’s nervous, shy, cute in how she answers him. 

“A few days ago,” Eren breathes and Jean is struck by the fact that Eren is also different, not his usual cocky playboy self. Although the confidence is still there, he speaks to Mikasa genuinely, with more affection than Jean is used to. “I missed you,” he tells her candidly and Connie almost spills his beer at the turn of the conversation. Eren smacks him for it as they await Mikasa’s answer. “I- Me too, I umm really missed you.” It’s silent for a moment as Eren mulls over what to say next but Mikasa interrupts, “Why are you calling me from Jean’s phone?” Eren’s smile turns wicked again, the line of jaw hardening, “He said he was seeing a Mikasa, thought i’d see if it was my Mikasa.” “Well I’m not currently your Mikasa am I?” She returns saucily and Eren chuckles, “We can change that if you let me come over.” “And why should I?” “Because I really fucking missed you and I haven’t had sex in nine months.” “Since the airport?” Mikasa questions curiously and Eren nods into the phone, almost like a puppy how obedient he is, “Back of my car you wore that sweater dress I love.”

There is a sigh on the other end of the line, and then a huff, “I’ll be at your apartment in an hour.” Eren fist pumps excitedly, “I’ll see you then Miki, now here talk to Jean.” He hands him back the phone with more smugness than should be allowed, and Jean takes it numbly, “Hello.” “I umm didn’t know you and Eren were friends,” Mikasa tells him awkwardly and Jean slumps in his chair, “I didn’t know you were Miki.” “Umm yeah,” she responds stiffly, “I’m umm I’m really sorry, he uh left and I didn’t expect to see him again.” Jean is just nodding and finally Mikasa sighs, taking pity on him, “I guess I’ll see you around then?” “Sure,” he tells her robotically, his brain spaced out now, flying far, far away at the entire turn of events because so much for his dating dreams. 

But the cherry on top is when Mikasa is mumbling a goodbye, jilted words that sound awkward coming from her lips, so different from the goodbyes he’s used to, the ones where he doesn’t want to hang up first lest she say something more. Because Eren holds his own phone out, the home screen he’s always been so damn protective of, slid to the farthest page, so there’s only two apps blocking the rectangular photo, nothing to distract from what’s on screen. Jean almost chokes as the line goes dead in his ear, the dial tone buzzing irritatingly, because on the screen is Mikasa, dishevelled and fucked out, lips glossy with a mixture of saliva and a glistening white substance that can only be cum, looking up at the camera with adoration he’s never seen. 

And the worst part, the worst part is the way Eren’s dick is pressed against her cheek, the thick length measured against her temple, spanning her whole face, a pretty contrast to the pink of her cheeks. She looks like something he’d pay for on OnlyFans, pay top dollar for the way Eren’s hand collars her throat, his thumb roughly pressed against her chin, smearing the white of his seed over her lips. It’s just as captivating as it is horrifying and Jean can’t look away, is only jarred out of the image by Eren pulling his phone away smugly. “That’s Miki,” he tells him casually, “And I know she’s not a virgin because I’m the one who took her virginity, shithead. I haven’t talked to her since I’ve been back though, she changed her phone number I think. I’d be more than happy to take it from you, though.” He hands over his own phone numbly and Eren is quick to share her contact with himself, all happy, whistling to himself, “Thanks for keeping her occupied while I was gone though. It’s good to hear she hasn’t been with anyone else, I’m gonna have fun stretching her out on my cock tonight.” And then he’s gone and Jean is left with the rest of their friends, gaping at his back because Eren has been talking about Miki forever, has been hoarding her to himself for years, refusing to introduce her to any of his friends, so possessive of her it’s ridiculous. 

And it’s just his fucking luck that she ends up being the only girl he’s been interested in for months.

[chaerssss]

REDAMANCY

Word count:- 4.2k (approx.)

Pairings:- childhoodbestfriend!hwa x y/n

Type:- Mini series (part 1)

Genre:- Fluff, angst, romance, comedy, a hint of fake relationship. (look forward to the smut in other parts besties!)

Song reccs:- Love, Maybe (secret number), stay with me (miki matsubara), Day and night (Jung seung hwan), Some (bol4)

Seonghwa's theme:- Ditto (instrumental)

Y/n's theme:- Gone (instrumental)

FYI:- the title means, 'A love returned in full'

"I'm so bored."

"Should we go eat at a café?"

"No."

"Karaoke?"

"No."

"Arcade?"

"No."

"Comic store?"

"No."

"Wanna go jump off a building with me?"

"Yes please."

The latter chuckled at your response and shook his head. His hands shuffled through his pockets and he took out an item familiar to you. "Here, you left your scrunchie at my house. My mum found it." Your eyes go wide to finally see the scrunchie you had almost died finding yesterday, "and i thought I had lost it."

Your hands hold the scrunchie and you wear it on your wrist, as you always did. "Seonghwa's always at your service ma'am!" Seonghwa said, imitating a butler and you laughed it off. The bell rang and it was finally time to leave the school. "Ok but seriously I'm in need of food!"

"But i recommended a café before, didn't i?" Seonghwa recalled how you had rejected the proposal, "but I wanna eat rice cakes made by you!"

Your hands clutched his arm, and Seonghwa's eyes fall to your face. You looked so tiny from his perspective, but he knew if he said it, he'd get beaten up. Then came your eyes. So pretty. And so...magical. As though they casted a spell and he fell, his heart couldn't take the visual right now. So he turned his face to the other side, hoping you won't see his red face, "alright!" He mumbled.

Coming back from school was probably the best part of your day back then. Going to beaches, cafés, random karaokes. Even in the middle of the night, you were glued to the computer screen, talking to Seonghwa, while doing your homework together.

The next morning, meeting at the same river with your cycles to reach the school at the same time. It was like you were living the best days of your life. And...you took them for granted. Maybe that's why it was taken away.

Everything was planned for the future too. Your savings for your future to buy an apartment together, then getting a job for college to pay the fees. Oh and how could you forget the seperate section of money both of you collected for an exo concert.

Everyone assumed that you both were in love.

You weren't. But he was.

And so you still dread that day. Graduation. Because, all your plans had scattered before your eyes. You maintained a safe distance from him. All while, faking a smile as your principal allowed the students to throw their hats in the sky. The crowd was so loud, strange and..dark.

It felt, as though, everyone around you were in slow motion. That's when your eyes met his. Instead of those bright, round eyes, you saw sorrow in them... Regret, pain.

He glanced at you once, as if capturing this moment with his eyes. His hands untied something on his hand and he turned his back at you. You could see him wipe his tears despite his attempts to be subtle. And seconds later he disappeared. And it all went blank.

"../n?"

"...ke up!"

"y/n?"

"Y/n!!"

Your eyes open with a gasp. You lay there for a while, trying to make sens of your surroundings, until a head pops out. "You're sleeping during work hours?" Uh-oh your boss had seen you.

"Jeez, joong you gave me a scare." And you turn your head in the other direction and cover it with your arms while on the desk.

This guy. With blue hair. Was your best friend. You both met in the first year of college, both a little lost, both a little crazy. You guys had sewed together many dreams. Unsure if the future was anything like you had planned for yourself. However, fortunately.

Both of you got admitted to a fashion company in your second year. Which is pretty big for you guys because you were still inexperienced. With ups and downs you learned, and eventually you officially became permanent members of the company.

Hongjoong was dear to the previous CEO, so she promoted his position. Many other employees were so jealous and some even left the company because of the mistreatment but to you, Hongjoong deserved it. Despite being young, he had worked hard. And now the company is doing even better than it was a few years back.

"I scared you? You were practically wincing in your sleep." Your expressions dropped at his comment. "'Don't leave, don't go...' who were you dreaming of?" He leaned, raising one of his eyebrows. "No one."

He laughed aloud, which you knew very well was his sarcastic laugh, "you've got some guts to lie straight to your teeth and to 'me'!" He pointed at his chest, knowing damn well, who you were dreaming of. "I'm going to get a coffee, it's already time to go home. Take a good rest."

The walk back home wasn't long, mere 20 minutes. You decided to walk or cycle, rather than use a vehicle. One could say you were health conscious. And yet, it felt like an hour. Your eyes wander around, gazing at the dipping sun and the ducks in the lakes were swimming back.

The old couple, as usual was at the bench, never failed to make you smile. A brisk breeze makes your hair dance. Your path is decorated with brown leaves that fell from the now leaf less trees. A few get crushed under your shoes making a crunch sound, giving you a sense of satisfaction.

It was the same actually. Your hometown. Nothing had changed. And yet, something felt missing.

You bought an apartment as planned, it's well decorated, your salary is decent too, good Neighbors, a boss that's a friend as well, you have family and friend reunions from time to time. Everything was fine.

Then why?

Why did you still cry in the shower everyday?

Why did you still looked at that one picture frame for a little too long?

Why did your heart ache while watching those rom coms you once loved to watch?

Why did he still appear in your dreams?

Why, why won't your brain let you forget him?

A ring reaches your ears and pulls you from your thoughts. You put back the same photo frame, of him and you on the first day of school. He had a bowl cut and you had two silly pigtails. His cheeks were wet, he was crying, like his mother used to say...a crybaby. And you stood near him cracking the cutest pose when the kid next to you was having an existential crisis.

"Hello? Mom?"

"Oh hello honey, how are you?"

"I'm doing fine..what about you?"

"Oh me too, uh...sorry to call you at this hour but Surprise, surprise Mr and Mrs Park are here!" She exclaimed.

"...uhm, mom be specific."

"Seonghwa's mom! Well his parents are here and they wanted to meet you. After all it's been so many years. You should come by."

"...what?"

Your heart sank. You could feel it. All the other sense had been turned off. You couldn't hear a thing or what your mom said and then cut the call off, the only sound you could hear was a precise ring. It had gotten a little hard to breathe. You put the phone down and held your head with your palms.

You can't comprehend what just happened. Neither do you know why's this happening but your anxiety level had risen to a whole new level. You keep walking around your living room in your comfortable extra large hoodie, in stress.

Was it really required for you to be there? And first of all, out of all the times, they decided to greet us now? What if you just ran away? Hongjoong could help!

And for a moment you came back to your senses, your thoughts had halted and you gently sat on the edge of your sofa's arm. Your lips let out a scoff, "he still has an effect on me..." That's the funny thing. Because all those years, there was not a single spark between you and him. Well, it might've been different for him. But, at the the same time you could never imagine a day without him.

Why are you like this? What has he done to you? You stare off at the empty wall, with the spirals of your words you doodle across it with your eyes. Just like that the time flew by and you hear your house bell ring. It pulled you out of your thoughts and you open the door without thinking much into anything.

Or without predicting that the person at this hour could be none other than...Park Seonghwa. "How is my favourite person doing?"

7 years.

7 fucking years.

And these are the first words he says to you. The last thing he said to you was something you still remember. Now look at him, calling you out so nonchalantly. Yeah...look at him.

He had changed. His style had changed. Or perhaps, seeing him after so many years was so...shocking. Back then, he couldn't style clothes for himself, or tie his tie. You remember, you were the one who taught him to tie his laces in around 2nd grade.

Look at him now. He looks lovely. As if he just came out of a magazine cover. Not a blemish on his skin, brighter than the sun. His jawline had gotten so sharp, and his shoulders. Even though he wore a coat due to the chilly weather, you could see they had gotten broader. His hair a little longer, his eyes...still intense as ever.

You probably look like an idiot, standing there with your jaw open and eyes wide, staring at your childhood bestfriend. So invested in his beauty, you had forgotten to speak. So the man just made his way inside the apartment.

"Woah, so you did buy an apartment for yourself. I must say it's well decorated!" He wandered around the house, admiring each and everything while you slowly started coming back to reality.

"What....what are you doing here?" You finally spoke as you closed the door behind you. The room temperature had fell down a little due to the cool air entering through the door you had opened for a little too long. "me?" He pointed to his chest, while looking at you with his boba eyes. As if there were more than two people in the room.

"...of course you!" You said with eyebrows furrowed because what kind of a question was that? He slowly makes his way to the sofa and settles there as though it was his house? He took out an apple from the fruit basket kept on the table, "I'm a friend y/n, of course I came here to see you. It's been 7 years after all!" He took a bite and it felt like the crunch had echoed through the dead silent house.

"...just like that?" Your eyes narrowed and had visible pain in it. And his were an opposite of yours. "Oh! You should get ready, my parent's are at your house, waiting for us to arrive." His voice muffled because of the fruit. And you just followed. You don't know if he had noticed your slightly teary eyes....you didn't care.

You were still perplexed and had to sit in the same car as him. This is the best time to regret your decision of not buying a car. Plus, the whole faking the smiles among his parents and yours. But it had been such a long time, seeing aunt and uncle. All the memories came flowing like water. Her delicious mochi dessert, or how she scolded hwa when he teased you. Uncle's first car, in which he took you to all the parks known to mankind, or his annual gifts for you.

So you just hugged them and sobbed like a child. Which didn't go unnoticed by Seonghwa. It reminded him how close you guys actually were. Even your families. All those little picnics and trips. And seeing you cry like that made his heart swell...how because of him a beautiful relationship like so was about to be destroyed.

Even though you said that you could return back on your own. Both of your families insisted that you should go with Seonghwa. And that man didn't back down as well. See if it would've been any other person, you would've agreed but to think it was Seonghwa. You had to again bear the awkwardness in the car.

The entire time you were looking out the window. Trying to distract your mind, which.... didn't work as always.

"Why did you come back?" You asked, still looking outside the window. Afraid to meet his gaze. The roads were empty as it was around midnight, it was a smooth drive. Thanks to that, the awkwardness was easy to manage.

"...I was trying to avoid the question." He chuckled which made you look at him. "Well not you can't..." "i know.."

He continued, " i know, I know it's weird that I came back..and at this point of life where, you probably moved on from the past. But I'm here to tell you that..."

The car came to a pause and because of the impact you slightly moved forward, and the words that's came out of Seonghwa's mouth were enough to rethink your entire life, "reconcile our friendship."

"....why?"

He seemed taken aback by your response, "well...it seems like you certainly don't want to." Jeez, his teasing habit still hasn't changed. "No...it's not like that,..." You paused and you fixated your eyes on dashboard, instead of his eyes, "why..did you have to leave in the first place..if you were gonna come back?"

Seonghwa gave out a deep sigh, "y/n-ah..." His honey like voice, said your name. He let his head rest on the seat and a lazy smirk appeared on his face...he must've been tired. Your heart...it's beating abnormally fast. "We were kids back then...and I was the one at fault. So... consider this as an apology, for what happened during graduation."

So carefree.

Why?

If the feelings he felt were true...so true that he decided to leave. How can he be saying these things to you?...were you...the one who hadn't moved on?

"I love you..."

His words. You still remember them. His expressions... his eyes. Everything.

"So what do you say y/n?"

Maybe you were in the wrong back then...or maybe you and no idea how to respond.

"I have..since we were kids."

It was flowing back to you as he sat right in front of you, recklessly asking you to turn back to the friendship he had broken. And made you like this.

"Hm?"

So,...your emotions weren't valid now, right? Neither were your feelings...So why should you care?

"Be mine for an eternity."

Your throat had started to feel tight. You took in a gulp to eliminate the lump, "I'm willing to be friends again..."

"Woah you look terrible.." Hongjoong says as he comes by your cubicle. Of course, you do. You couldn't sleep a wink last night. "Do you wanna know the reason?" You ask him while lazily typing on the computer. "Hm, as far as I know it could not be a human, so I'm guessing, a sad movie or series?" Terrible. What a reputation you had built.

"I'm afraid this time it's the opposite." You've never seen Hongjoong throw his bun on the ground with his eyes so wide they could pop out anytime, "what...the..f-" you cover his mouth just in time. "rest in peace, Mr bun, it was not your fault."

For the next few minutes, you explain Hongjoong your entire story. The way your life quite literally changed in a night. "... that's actually crazy...and reckless. I mean I would personally call it shameless but I know that you called dibs on him so..." You crane your neck towards him, "I did not. I never told you that!"

"Well it's obvious isn't it?" He plops from the desk and stands straight in front of you, "it is weird he came back out of the blue. If I'm being honest...you should clear out the things with him." His hands come to caress your head, "i care about you...I mean I'm enough for that jerk but I don't want you to get hurt in any way. Sort it out, what you feel and what he feels."

Your bestfriend's words kept circling around your brain. Even as you walk back to your house. However, you see a familiar car in the middle of the road, a man leaning on it's door, carefully looking at his watch. His long hair,...look so fluffy, his eyes are hidden by the sunglasses but as soon as he spots you, those cheerful eyes are revealed. His hand waving to you and you walk straight to him.

"What're you doing here?"

"Here to pick you up!" He says in an exciting tone, which you find annoying because can he tone his excitement down. And yet at the same time you can't take up the fact, how adorable he is. But then, Hongjoong's words echo in your brain again. And for some reason, right now, feels like the best time to ask him the question.

"Um...I wanted to ask you something." You say, hesistent at first. "Go on..." Your hands clutch the fabric of your tote bag, "If I'm being honest, you coming back...didn't sit right for me. And..I know that you understand that it wouldn't feel good for me...might as well take some time to adjust."

Seonghwa seems to understand each and every word and he knows where this is headed. Yet, you can't catch an expression of vulnerability. Or pain.

But why were you hoping for it? Why did you want him to feel bad about a thing that happened 7 years ago? "But...I hope...your feelings for me have died down." Oh my god, you said it! Could there be a better way of saying it? Were you too harsh? A ton of questions already bombarded you.

Seonghwa starts with a light chuckle, and a bright smile gets morphed onto him, "I know...i completely get you. I think i forgot to mention but...i have a girlfriend."

....

Oh.

".. that's nice. I'm.. I'm happy for you." Maybe you were. Tch. Who were you lying to? You weren't. Your heart sank and you couldn't hear a word he said afterwards. A girlfriend huh? So you really were the only one who was still stuck in the past. You wanted to cry. You wanted to weep. And ask him why?

Couldn't he have waited just a little longer? Couldn't he have given you another chance?

Why would he?

The smell of the wet grass reaches you from the park, the gardener must be working. A few moments ago, you couldn't hear a thing and it feels as if all your five sense have been activated. And you feel a little too hot. Your palms were sweaty and your head felt all woozy.

"So, shall we go to a café hm?" His soft voice reached your ears. You just had a lot of emotions bottled up. "Seonghwa... let's go to a bar."

You wake with a sudden feeling. It is becoming a habit of yours to wake up as if you just experienced a bad dream, like the way main leads in a movie wake up. For a few seconds, you lay there... contemplating your life. Your eyes wandering around the house.

The familiar fan you always open your eyes to, the blinds still closed but the sun light pouring in from the spaces, your tv on the front that you bought with so much excitement. The same cream and white walls. Yeah, you were home.

The bed started to feel like a fluffy cloud and you just wanted to sleep again, but...your head was pounding so bad. It was almost like you felt your heartbeat in your brain. And your throat felt so dry. You slowly got up, your hands gave support to your head and you turn to the side table to have some water.

While sipping the water you notice something unfamiliar kept there, a small glass bottle. The label on it read 'hangover cure'. Hm.

Wait.

So, you drank last night. Crazy how you had forgotten everything. It was there but a blur...maybe it'll come back. Because you definitely don't remember buying a hangover drink. But oh well, you took it because your head felt like it could kill you any moment. As you're about to take a sip, your hands feel a texture different from the glass. It was paper. Your turn the bottle around to see a pink sticky note with hello kitty's doodles on it. It read 'drink this, it'll lighten the headache!! - SH'

Ah. It was Seonghwa.

You carried on with your day. Slow. Thank God it was a Saturday because what would you have done if you had to go to work today? While doing that your mind tries to recollect what happened.

"I know...i completely get you. I think i forgot to mention but...i have a girlfriend."

Couldn't he have given you another chance?

Why would he?

"Seonghwa, let's go to a bar."

"I'm familiar with this place, a few of my friends and colleagues brought me here countless times." As if on cue the bartender called out for you and you waved back at him. Seonghwa was surprised at the interaction.

Especially, the bartender's reactions. He acted all shy and soft. Well...now that he's observing him, he's not that bad looking. Tsk. That is what's bothering him right now. However, his eyes fell back at you and he admired your features.

It was all coming back to him now. All from when his mum made him talk to the girl he used to look at secretly from behind the tree in the playground. And there you were. Your hair tied in two low pigtails, with ribbons on them and tiny clips holding your baby hair.

To when you both were in highschool, eating lunch together on the bench that was near a lake, having deep late night talks on the rooftop, movie sessions at his house specifically because it felt just right according to you. Him teaching you how to cook and you ended up burning whatever you made because that could not be called food. Or how....you used to say things so nonchalantly to him. Not knowing the effect they had on him.

"I'd do anything as long as it's with you."

"The moon sent you to me."

And now you're sitting in front of him, grown beautifully into an adult, drinking like a mad woman. He chortles at the thought. His admiration for you is interrupted because of a phone call. "Y/n..i have to take this. Stay here alright?" He made sure to tell you this very carefully because you were already so drunk. "Don't leave ok? I'll be back in a few seconds.." he left only after he had heard you say ok...or more like inaudible mumbles.

But of course you weren't gonna stay on your place. He comes back to an empty chair. In attempts of finding you everywhere, he has to now push through the crowds. The club is so noisy. (It's supposed to be noisy park Seonghwa smh). His anxiety levels are rising right now, you're an adult you can take care of yourself but being drunk...you can act quite crazy.

The universe is literally screaming at this point for Seonghwa to look behind. Because you are having your own concert on the random table and are surrounded by strangers. Who... apparently are enjoying it?

As soon as he turns his head he's... perplexed. Because you're dancing seductively on a 2000s song, in your work clothes. Which was actually not that boring since you worked in the fashion department. Your white dress that reached just above your knees and a cropped pastel blue sweater on top, supporting the attire with your kneee high socks and platform heels.

You ruffle around your hair, use your hands to touch your body, feeling yourself. Not caring about the world. Looking like the main actress of a drama. Oh god, why was his heart beating so fast? His jaw was open, as if surprised but not complaining. However, as soon as his eyes go below he finds a crowd of people there.

Clearly, he wasn't the only one having fun. So disgusting these people are. Recording and gawking at a young, drunk woman. Well...not all of them. Seonghwa tried to call you down but you kept rejecting, all in your world. Until you hit a light on your forehead slightly, and came back down. Seonghwa immediately covered you with his coat, and gently rubbed your forehead.

The next thing you knew, you were outside walking around. And your drunk self being silly as usual. From screaming at the ducks for being so cute, to complaining about why bananas weren't pink. And Seonghwa couldn't help but laugh which you were offended by.

"It's not funny, it's a geniune request for the universe!!" Your voice all raspy and wobbly and so were your steps. "Why did you drink if you're such a lightweight?"

"...i don't know, I felt like it."

Yeah right. It was all just to escape from the pain of confused feelings.

"Hwa?" Your lips let out the nickname after so many years and it ignited a spark in the said man's heart. He looked at you as if...you hung the stars in the sky. "Yes y/n-ah?"

"Do you believe in soulmates?" The question got him a little off-guard but he replied anyways, "I do.." you took a deep sigh and clutched his coat that was on your shoulders even tighter, the cold wind slapping your face, it turned your nose and cheeks red, "then, do you believe in lovers that are meant to be?"

"Yes I do." He said, without taking eyes off of you. He saw you pause a little, hesistent maybe. And then you turned your gaze to him and spoke in a soft tone, "...what about... lover's who are unaware of each other's feelings..."

The wind kept picking up it's pace, you saw his hair dance, while his eyes...they looked, hurt. Why? Did you say something wrong? It was because he knew what you were hinting at. He would like to talk about it...one day, he'll make you sit and talk all about it. But finding the right time is getting harder. And he's afraid he might lose the time.

Before he opens his mouth to speak you shut him by saying it's late and we should head back. The entire car ride was so awkward. Not that it was anything new, but the drinking helped to distract you from the situation. As soon as you got out of the car, you gave him his coat back. The warmth that was taken away, you felt so dejected.

Perhaps it was the alcohol, but he seemed even more mesmerising than before. You just wanted to kiss him...but it'd be too spontaneous huh? His scent felt so intoxicating. While walking back a few tears fell from your eyes, you're not sure why. Seonghwa saw you wiping them....it broke his heart to see you like that, but what could he possibly do when in the first place, it was because of you, the seperation happened.

You can be quite a handful. Sitting on the beanbag, with coffee in your hand and a book on your lap. Which was just..there. because your mind was preoccupied by your last night's embarassing acts.

You felt a vibration as you were sitting on the bean bag, then your phone caught your attention. 'mum' the words shone bright on them.

"Hey honey...how was your day yesterday?" Her voice as gentle as ever. "It was...alright. I'm hungover right now by the way." To which you received a fit of laughter. Your mum had always been your biggest support, she was like a ball of sunshine wrapped in the attire of a mother. She always taught you to stay humble, grateful and a little crazy for the fun's sake. That's why you can share whatever you want with her.

"Whom did you go out with? Was it Hongjoong? Or That blind date guy, what was his name? Mountain?" She asked and you internally laughed at the 'mountain', "San mom, his name was San." A little Ah, of realisation came from the other end. "And no...I was with, Seonghwa."

As if other people weren't enough she started making teasy sounds and the 'oohs', for a fact you know her eyebrows are wiggling and she's poking the air which indirectly is you. "Mooom!" You whined trying to stop her trail of thoughts. "You know we're just friends right?"

"Of course I do...but he's a good guy no?" You rolled your eyes as if she could see you right now, "That doesn't provide as a valid reason to date him?" And your mom counter attacked with, "well, San was a nice guy too, I also teased you about him but you never gave him a chance as well."

You halted, because if it was about your relationship status, you could never win in that section with your mum. "I'm just saying....you guys have known each other since you were kids, and he's attractive too, hm?" Yeah, you would agree on that one thing. All those memories, where a number of girls had approached you just to fish out seonghwa's number or to get close to him. Oh and how could you forget the amount of gifts he recieved during valentine's day.

Thinking about it now, really makes you realize that...what you felt back then, was 'jealousy'. And not in a way that your friend was being taken away from you. But because...he was yours. It had always been Seonghwa and Y/n from the start.

"Besides, the way you two look at each other, can't just limit you to just 'friends'."

Was it really that obvious? Your lips gave out a sigh and you took another sip of your coffee. "Oh also, Seonghwa's parents are celebrating there 26th marriage anniversary, and all of us are invited."

The location was sent on your phone, you had to focus on the 'getting ready' part. On god, you never thought much about your outfits but today. Specifically today, you wanted to look the best out there. If Hongjoong was here he would've said "who are you going to impress with that dress?" While smirking and teasing the shit out of you.

But honestly,...who were you going to impress? "S-.." don't say it. You can't admit it!

The party venue was so beautiful. It was an outdoor restaurant, and filled with nature. Those trees and bushes were decorated with golden fairy lights, as you walked a bit further, all the tables were settled and flowers were hung on strings with more fairy lights that acted like a ceiling. Every table had a candle lamp. This reminded you very much of Tangled for some reason.

Your parents had already met you, in fact, even Seonghwa's parents greeted you. The only person missing was him. The party had all sorts of people, some you knew and some were absolute strangers. Amongst all, you wanted to look for him.

So restless. As though, without him you can't breathe. It just makes you question how the hell did you survive these 7 years without him? It must be funny to him too. You could've stopped him....but something about his back on you, made you feel like you weren't worth him.

A champagne flute in your hand, you were there physically but your mind was lost in the clouds of memories. Should you even be feeling this right now. As you're eyes wander around a tap on your shoulder is felt to which you turn around, "Who're you waiting for?"

Your head rotates towards the voice to find Seonghwa in a fitted white shirt, the first few buttons opened to expose his collarbones. God, you could almost outline his built, might be the lightening or the material of the shirt and he had rolled the sleeves up to his elbows, which for some reason was so hot? The bottoms were black, his wrist had a rolex while his neck was adorned with a gold chain. Oh yeah...he used to wear that back then too. His hair were down, and so floofy, you wanted to run your hands through them.

"Y/n?" His fingers snapped in front of you and you came back to your senses, realizing you were practically gawking at the said man. However, you weren't the only one observing. You could feel his gaze go from the top of your head to your toes. Analyzing, more like admiring the way you looked. Although, he wanted to rip of the dress right then and there that hugged your body so perfectly, he had to control himself.

The bun didn't make it any easier as well, the dresse's square neckline exposed your collarbones and he noticed that the dress had a slit as it went down showcasing one of legs. Gosh, you looked like a goddess.

"Y/n...you look, beautiful." He complimented in his soft voice, the way he looked down on you, and for some reason he leaned in even closer, your breath had started to hitch so bad. Your aura was now filled by his stimulating scent, he slouched down to meet your eyes, his eyes boring right into yours.

Somehow the whole world faded away, it was just you and him. One of his hands came up and tucked a hair strand behind your ear, from there, it went to your earlobe. He caressed it so softly, you were sure you'd fall, your knees were so weak, all because of the proximity between you guys.

"Did your earring get lost?" He whispered, and you stood there dumbfounded. "Hm?"

"Your earring."

Then it made sense to you, he was talking about one of your earrings which probably fell somewhere and you had no idea. "Oh...um...i-i.." ah yes, the classic stammering. No, honestly now you get why those main actresses reacted this way, tongue tied because apparently your mind goes blank and all you can think about right now is kissing him.

His smirk was still pasted on his face, like he enjoyed teasing you, "that's alright we'll find it." The rest of the night was beautiful. You enjoyed every second of it. Because on the dinner table your parents couldn't stop talking about your childhood stories and the same was for hwa's parents.

All the little stories, and Seonghwa's were mostly embarassing and you knew he wanted to run away. His face was so red and the wine was absolutely not the reason. Meanwhile, your laughter couldn't be stopped. You guys really stayed together for so long huh.

After a while when you got up to get ice cream, you see Seonghwa talking to a man. He seemed familiar for some reason. Just as gorgeous, but his hair were longer and he wore earrings in both his ears, and was also shorter than hwa. You decided to join them.

"Hey guys..." You started but it felt like you made a wrong decision because the atmosphere for some reason was already so tense. "Yes, her." Seonghwa said and you looked at him in confusion because now both of them were looking at you with their narrow eyes. "Wh-" and before you could speak Seonghwa interrupts, "my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?" A voice from the back greeted you. How lovely.

Both of your families had heard what this man had blurted out.

Astounded. You sit in the car. Staring into space. Seonghwa sat besides you, panicking visibly. No, because if someone passed by the car they would see the most comical scene. You hear a meek, really timid call for your name and you don't even bother to look at the man. Instead you click your tongue and start screaming on top of your lungs.

"YOU IDIOT! WHAT HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?! HUH?" While throwing anything and everything you could find- which somehow included a bottle of sanitizer and a chocolate box?

"YOU ALREADY HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! WHY THE HECK WOULD YOU LIE? ARE YOU CHEATING ON HER?? THIS WAS NOT THE WAY YOU WERE RAISED PARK SEONGHWA!!" nag nag, like a mom. And hwa was going through what could be described as a traumatic experience because now came your smacks and punches.

"Y/n let me explain!!" The man finally managed to say something but you hit him more before calming down. Seonghwa looked like a scared cat as he passed a water bottle to you. You glared at him and snatched the bottle, gulping it down.

"It's gonna come as a stupid excuse...but that just...slipped off my tongue." He began and you hands already found themselves in your hair, clutching them hard, "...what would you say to your girlfriend then? Why'd you take my name anyways?"

His face morphed into that of sorrow, "we...uh.." you already knew what he was going to say. "Broke up." It pained you to see him like this. You still remember vivdly, how he was so afraid to talk to other girls but some of his friends made him go on a blind date, and those girls were mean, they insulted him and he came back crying. This was 10th grade by the way. His head in your lap as you tried to calm him down.

He had always been so soft, you couldn't imagine what he would've went through in this cruel world. "We were already very distant. It always felt like we there just for the show. So last night...she finally decided to break up."

Now the stars align.

He then explained why he said that there on the spot. Apparently, Wooyoung, is one of his work rivals. He didn't want to back down in front of him, because he had taken a full 2 months vacation from his work, saying that he's getting engaged. And well, seeing Wooyoung here, he got a bit freaked out, because Wooyoung could end his career. But luckily you walked straight there, like an angel.

Yeah, more like a lamb walking into a lion's den.

"But you could've said it a little less loud... because the whole family heard...and it's going to take a lot of time to clear this misunderstanding." You began, because your families that already shipped you, were in their emotional phase right now and anything you would say could be and would be taken as a betrayal.

"Sorry..." He muttered.

Despite having a pout on your face you took your handkerchief and blew hot air on it so that it'll warm up and then used that as a heating devide on Seonghwa's forehead, "...must've hurt.."

Seonghwa watches you care for him, even though you winced more and kept asking "does it hurt?" Tch. Gosh, only if he could kiss you right now. Wait. What?

Yes, he thought that right now.

It's isn't his fault though. If one thing he has learned from his friendship with you, is that, soulmates exists. And one-sided love is true. God, he fell so hard. He can't look at anyone else like the way he looks at you. And no one, no one makes him feel the things you do. "You look like a dream..."

He says out of the blue, and you slowly move your eyes to meet his, that's when you realise you're too close. Dangerously close. "What did you say?" You whispered, too scared to speak up, as though breaking the shell both of you had created around you in a span of seconds.

"You look like a dream."

Wow, somehow you survived the situation. You're standing at your door step while Seonghwa's car is still outside the main gate, waiting for you to get inside. But you don't, you look back once again, with a grin, a little too happy for some reason and wave at him. You see him chuckle as he waved back and you got inside. You never wanted to leave but...had to.

As soon as you close the door you slide against the door, looking red like a tomato. Your palms hide your face as you squeal and giggle like a teenager in love. "I'm in trouble..."

Seonghwa thinks back at the moment, he got bold huh? But, someone honked right from behind then screamed "get a room". Yes. It was Wooyoung. He smiled at the memory, he takes off his watch and then his shirt to change into comfortable clothes that's when he realises, he forgot to return you something. His hand shuffle into the pockets of his pants.

A sigh leaves his lips, "guess this gives us another chance to meet." His palm held your earring that you had lost. He doesn't look like it but he is sneaky, he found that earring near where you stood but you were too lost in your world.

So you were Seonghwa's fake girlfriend now. And your family also believed that lie. Crazy, but now they kept teasing you for it. Something about marriage and kids and what not. You shurgged it off whenever you were on a call with them or ignored it when you were with them but secretly...you tried so hard to keep a poker face.

Even at work Hongjoong had caught you daydreaming, and he'd say "love looks good on you". If you were being honest... you've thought about it. How would it be feel to call him your one and only? To live with him? Sleep on the same bed with him....how would it feel if your feelings were reciprocated?

However deep down, anxiety rose in the pit of your stomach. The reality is not it...it's nothing like your imaginations and thoughts. He might not feel the same way at all. "might not?" A painful smile appeared on your face...he obviously doesn't. He had moved on, and you were still stuck in the past like a teenager in love. Sleepless at nights, thoughts of him lingering a little too longer in your mind, replaying moments with butterflies each time.

In a different home and setting...things were quite similar. He realised his feelings had not even decreased one per cent. He'd laugh at the fact how confident he felt when he came back from abroad, feeling 100 per cent sure his heart wouldn't pick up it's pace and your eyes wouldn't work their magic on him.

Oh boy, was he wrong?

The moment he saw you, his pupils enlarged and his jaw opened slightly to take on all your beauty. How can a person become even prettier as time passed by? The world suddenly started to seem bright with you. And it wasn't a foreign feeling at all, it was as though he'd come back home. You. Just like before, every love song was and still remains about you.

How...vile of his heart? To not let go someone who doesn't even wants him. He hated the idea of you with someone else, but he was ready to leave you as long as you were happy. But...he didn't realize it was going to be this difficult.

Basically these two idiots had no idea, both of them liked each other secretly. They were hopelessly in love with each other.

Days went by, your work routine stayed the same but you know what else changed? Your evenings. Your nights. God, all the while you just patiently waited for your job to end, in fact, some days Hongjoong would let you off the hook early.

Then you and Seonghwa would explore the town in his car. Laughing, enjoying, mocking each other, taking silly pictures. It felt like those days were back, and you weren't going to take them for granted anymore.

Just like that, a dinner happened. It was organised by Wooyoung, Hwa's rival and both of you were invited. It was actually shocking to see those two act so in love at the dinner, because Wooyoung wouldn't stop kissing Seonghwa, he was just so drunk but then Seonghwa cleared that he was like that even when he was sober.

A lot of things happened during the dinner but the real fun...was after that. You guys strolled in the parks, laughing. Even catching a young couple, sitting on the benches, experiencing love probably for the first time.

Maybe it was invasion of privacy but it was just so wholesome watching the guy on the right put his hand on the bench and the guy, shorter than the first one, on the left inch by inch hold his hand and both of them looked on opposite directions probably blushing so hard.

You turned to see Seonghwa, his body was hovering you but his gaze was fixated on the couple on the front. You guys were hiding behind a few bushes. God if he looked down at you, you really couldn't control yourself. He never looked down but...you knew he was aware of you lingering gaze on him. How you traced his face structure.

You went to the karaokes, the beach in fact, which was eerily empty and because you were a fool in love, you found it romantic. Or going to the teokkbokki stall that was now built into a restaurant, and surprisingly the owner recognised you.

"Did you go to xyz High school?" The old lady with curly hair asked and Seonghwa responded yes, with a smile. "Aigoo, no wonder I've seen you before! You used to come here after school hours right?"

"Woah you remember!" You said, amazed. "So you guys became a couple huh? Ooh, such a cute and romantic dynamic. It's always the childhood sweethearts." She said while poking her fingers at Seonghwa's shoulder who was too perplexed to even deny her. You bit back a smile, watching his cheeks glow red and his silly reactions. He hadn't changed one bit.

Then when you sat on the bench near Han river, to watch a firework show. You don't think you can hold onto the feelings you felt when you were with him. It was so fuzzy...and warm. Like home..as you always said.

This time Seonghwa spoke, while gazing at the star filled sky, his eyes were bright once again. You aren't sure what he said at the start... because you were mesmerized by his magical looks...and not just because of his face, you could see yourself kissing his soft lips, holding his face in your hands, hugging him....

"Every time we're together, I just feel so happy and fulfilled..." 'I just wish I was brave enough to say the words, but maybe you feel the same way?'

You heard him say....and a smile creeped up your lips as he looked at you. A moment later the fireworks started to explode and your attention was preoccupied by them..in various colours they piped in the dark sky. Like painting an empty canvas... that's exactly how Seonghwa made you feel.

"I love you..."

You whispered while enjoying the fireworks, knowing damn well your words were muffled due to the loud noise of those fireworks. And yet it felt so light....that you couldn't stop smiling. "Hey..." He called for you and when you looked at him, he was holding out two sparklers, that ngit you lit then and smiled like children.

'I wish I was brave enough to tell you how I truly felt...'

"Hwa!" Your knuckles knock on the door of his hotel room. He wasn't living in his old house with parents but seperately, he said he wanted to buy an apartment just like you. Which amde you chuckle.

Today, you stood in front of his door because you were finally ready to confess after a contemplation of a week. Holding a bouquet, with a blush on your face. However, Seonghwa didn't seem to respond.

"..oh the door is unlocked?" Your hands wrap around the door knob and open it up, "..is he not home?" mumbling to yourself, you took in the view the room provided. The silence was really strange and uncomfortable. Because you could hear... something.

You turned around swiftly, in hopes for finding someone...but there was no one. A sound of something falling from the left greeted you, and your anxiety was growing...you didn't want to whisper for some reason. You just followed the voice, hoping that it was Seonghwa. It lead you to the bathroom.

A sigh left your lips once you saw Seonghwa, his body turned around...and half naked? Your cheeks were red....and when he moved just a little to the left..

It was another woman.

Your heart sank to your stomach...and your eyes dropped down. Your eyebrows furrowed, lips slightly twitched. Unconsciously, you clenched on to the bouquet, not realising it had thorns, which pricked one of your fingers.

A tears drop fell and mixed with the blood from your lips because you were biting on it too hard. With a sigh, you stormed away, but on your way you slammed the door. Throwing the bouquet somewhere in the hallway, the blood had trickled down till your wrists, while your lips won't stop bleeding and your tears....they were the same.

Fuck you didn't even have a car to escape as fast you wanted to.

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why?

.....why?

Your feet took you somewhere you knew you'd feel better, if not...you won't feel terrible like you just did a few seconds ago. Your mind kept replaying the scene like a broken casette. Once you reached the garden...you plopped on the ground and hugged your knees.

Clicking your tongue, you bow your head.."it doesn't feel that bad..."

So you said....still crying as if you had been betrayed. You felt like your world was falling apart in front of your eyes.

Everything seemed to melt away, and the ground beneath your feet was turning to dust. Your chest felt like it was caving in on you, and could feel your heart breaking in your throat.

You knew this would happen, that some day he would meet someone else, but to see it right in front of you... to see the two of them together... You just... don't know what to do with yourself anymore.

"So...I never really knew you.." you cried with your breaking voice. Maybe... you took all this for granted again...

Two weeks had passed by.

And you and Seonghwa hadn't talked since then.

Remembering your conversation with Hongjoong was just absolutely painful at this point.

"So...do you like him then?"

"I don't want to."

"But..you do?"

"I do."

Then proceeding to cry out a river. It was all so funny to you. You were the one who rejected him first anyway.

...

Did you?

Oh fuck it who even cares if I didn't or not...i never had the courage to tell him how i felt. I was so afraid..a fucking coward!

"Y/n!"

You turned around to see the same man, you wanted to avoid. Because you knew if right now you saw him...you'd break.

"Where have you been?" He came running towards you in his dress shirt, his tie loosened up, a few buttons opened. His hair still styled up, looked like he had just gotten off from his office.

He had grown up.

He came in front of you and painted while his hands were on his knees. "Wooyoung said he wanted to meet you again and it-"

"Let's stop acting like this Seonghwa." Your stern voice caught him off guard and he looked at you with a concerned look. "What?...but you agreed.."

"I did...and honestly, I'm sorry i did. I was an idiot." Your throat felt so hoarse and tight, eyes were glazed over, staring at the person in front of you.

You were trying so hard to stay calm and collected, but the tears were welling up in your eyes, threatening to spill over at any moment.

"No, no, no" you whispered to yourself, you can't break down like a child again. It was all for the best...right?"

"Did...did something happen?" His hand extended to stop you, to hold you, to embrace you...instead you took a step back, "You...have so many people that you have to meet. So many things that you have to do...I think it's best to spend them.. without me. Oh and.."

Your hand shuffle through your bag and take out a bracelet with a star charm, you remember you used to have an identical one but with an infinity charm, "here...keep this."

Seonghwa took the item in his hand, thoroughly observing it, "you...found this?"

"Mhm...I kept it when you untied it and there it in the middle of the ground." Seonghwa looked absolutely distraught. This was no what he had expected when he came back from the office, "don't keep sanitizers in your car." As though you were trying to make him realise what he had done wrong, you bitterly smiled but looked at him for the last time, "it'll remind you of us."

[magicalgirl-safespace]

Caregiver Sayaka Miki Head cannons•🗡️

(Warning for mentions of witches and ouchies‼️)

(I ASKED A FRIEND WHICH CHARACTER FROM HOLY QUINTET I SHOULD DO NEXT AND THEY PICKED SAYAKA!!!)

- Sayaka is so sweet to you

- She has alot of rules but most of them are for your safety! She doesn't punish you if you break any rule, just lightly lectures you

- Will show you some of her powers! Like I said in the Mami post, only the more safer powers are shown to you

- Beats up anyone who makes fun of you

- Won't let you come with her to witch hunts since it's dangerous, but will share a nicer version of what happened if you ask

- Really affectionate if you're comfortable, holding you, holding your hand, etc. Any sort of contact is enough for her

- Likes keeping a schedule, for example she has times for when you need to eat or sleep

- Loves picking out outfits for you! You sometimes match with her!

- Whenever you get an ouchie Sayaka will heal it right up for you!

- She has a whole plushie collection in her room just Incase you visit!

Sayaka loves you so much and hopes she. Can show it by keeping you safe >3

[sailorstarr-chan4]

Of Kisses and Treasures

I meant to post this weeks ago.... Oh well lol. Here's part 2 of my 12 ship fics for 12 years of friendship project! @risingfire17-the-weeb-trash, here, you can finally share my Amuto trash on your blog lol. ❤

Posted on: ff.net and AO3 Fandom: Shugo Chara! Pairing: Amuto (Amu/Ikuto) Word Count: 2,609 Rated: K+ Genre: Romance & Humor Setting: Post Shugo Chara! Doki Warning: Dubcon kissese (at first)

Disclaimer: Yes, this fic features Amuto. I am deliberately vague about their ages, so you can imagine them as closer-in-age teenagers, if you wish, but their dynamic is still inspired by canon. This fic was written out of love for my best friend, who adores this ship and has every right to. Don't like, don't read.

With that out of the way... Enjoy!

~~~

The showdown and aftermath of the final battle against Easter was so swift and confusing that Amu Hinamori collapsed on her bed in her clothes, finding it impossible to motivate herself to change. The revelations of everything, from Dia’s reappearance to Ikuto’s freedom from the corrupted violin, to the boss’s motivations…. It was all too much! 

Sitting up in bed, groggily kicking off her socks in a half-hearted effort to at least start getting ready for bed, Amu tried to wrap her mind around every major revelation. 

“This is all too much for my mind to hold in….” she grumbled without thinking. 

Luckily (and rather uncharacteristically), Amu’s three Guardian Characters intuitively understood her meaning. The three nodded to each other and flew to their Bearer, each with their own methods of helping her cope. 

“No worries, Amu-chan! Su will go fix you a nice, warm cup of tea!” Su squeaked cheerfully. She flew out of Amu's room (Amu didn’t bother closing her door, she was so out of commission after the battle).  Distantly, she wondered if her parents would notice floating ceramic tea cups and water boiling by itself, then dismissed it, remembering her parents were gone for the evening for their respective jobs, Ami in tow. Smiling wryly, Amu called out her thanks to Su. 

“Also, here!” Miki helpfully presented her Bearer a notepad and pencil. “Why don’t you write down everything that we found out tonight? It’ll help with the process of understanding it all.” 

“Go, go, Amu-chan! Amu-chan saved the dayyyyy!” Ran sang out in her usual fashion. 

“Thanks, Ran, Miki.” Amu sighed deeply, feeling Easter’s dismantled power and her Guardian Characters’s support lift a heavy weight off her shoulders. Regardless of how confusing the night’s events were, at least it was all over. She pulled her knees up to her chest, using them as support for her notepad, and jotted down a list: 

Easter’s “boss” was a seven-year-old boy, the grandchild of Ikuto and Utau’s stepfather

Said “boss” had been collecting shiny valuable jewels and demanded the Embryo because it looked interesting

Easter made countless X Eggs, tormented Ikuto, and nearly destroyed so many children’s dreams all for this petty reason. (That was something Amu could never forgive, but she mostly blamed the “boss’s” grandfather)

The “boss” (whose name was Hikaru, Amu needed to remember that) tossed away the long sought-after Embryo when its shine waned

Hikaru lost his own heart’s egg long ago and the “Embryo” they had spent the last year chasing was actually Hikaru’s heart egg, trying to return home?! 

Hikaru got his heart egg back and finally cried, something he had never been allowed to do since he was a baby 

Easter finally stopped all their nonsense and conceded defeat

Ran and Miki peered over Amu’s shoulder after Amu paused, pressing the eraser end of her pencil against her chin.  

“That’s a lot of information to take in at once,” Miki commented dryly. 

“Tell me about it,” Amu groaned, rubbing her other hand through her hair. “I feel like my head won’t stop spinning!” 

Her two Guardian Characters hummed thoughtfully, then Ran gasped. 

“But wait! Amu-chan! You forgot something very important!” 

“Huh? I did? I’m pretty sure I got the basics, at least when it comes to Easter-rrr….” 

But Amu trailed off as Ran took hold of another pencil and clumsily sketched out a large but distinct addition underneath Amu’s list. 

Ikuto kissed Amu-chan!! (★^O^★) 

“EHHHHHHHH?!?!” 

The notepad, pencils, and Guardian Characters went flying as Amu shrieked at the top of her lungs, flailing her arms and legs. Ran and Miki squealed in alarm as they went spinning, but Amu paid them no heed, her cheeks burning as she flusteredly snatched the nearest pillow and burrowed her face into it. 

“D-d-d-doesn’t count! He– he was only t-t-teasing me! Like he always does! The pervy cat! The stupid stray! That creepy jerk–!” 

“Now, now, if you’re gonna insult me, at least get more creative.” 

Amu froze. A shiver of horror slid down her spine. She knew that voice. She knew that voice quite, er, intimately, considering she spent many, many, embarrassingly long days holding him up in her room…. 

But that didn’t stop her from freaking out. She jerked up her head to glare at the object of her ire, mortification written all over her face. 

“IKUTO?! Wh-what are you doing here?!” 

Par of the course, Ikuto was leaning casually against her patio door, shamelessly smirking, like he owned the place! In just mere hours after gaining his long-awaited freedom, he looked healthier than he had been for months. His eyes no longer had the telltale bags underneath, and he was much steadier on his feet. In which, he was far too steady as he strode across the threshold and picked up Amu’s notepad from off the floor—

Leaping out of bed, Amu scrambled to snatch it back, but Ikuto, the cheating bastard, held it high out of reach, using his other hand to hold a flustered and angry Amu in place as she fruitlessly pushed against the palm firmly on her forehead. 

“My, my….” he purred in that despicably knowing way he always did whenever he teased her. He pretended to consult the list carefully, ignoring Amu’s shrieks and groans of effort to free herself from him holding her back. “You are such a kid. One little peck on the cheek and you added it to your special list–” 

“DON’T PATRONIZE ME, YOU-YOU-YOU SONUVA—” 

 “Ah, ah, ah, language. Do you kiss your mom with that mouth?” Ikuto was grinning openly now. If Amu had been paying attention (as if she could, through her utter humiliation!), she would have noticed that Ikuto’s eyes were surprisingly soft and tender looking down at her. 

As it stood, she was too busy blushing furiously and stammering to even notice Ran and Miki in the background, consulting with Yoru, who looked thoroughly amused. 

“I bet you’re glad you’re back with your Bearer, Yoru-kun,” Miki said. 

“Nya! Yoru is beyoooond glad-nya!” Yoru beamed happily, looking away from watching Ikuto teasing Amu. “But other than missing Ikuto, I always knew he was okay, deep down.” 

“Really? How come? You always seemed awfully worried…” Ran asked curiously, tilting her head. 

“Well, ya see-nya, if Ikuto had really gone to the bad side or had given up, I would have disappeared, right? Or at least got an X on my egg. But I didn’t! Nya, I searched for Ikuto and never once felt like I was gonna disappear or anything, cuz Ikuto is a good guy-nya!” Yoru spoke with so much pride and happiness, that even Amu was temporarily distracted from her fight for her dignity. 

“Really? You never gave up on Yoru, Ikuto…?” 

Ikuto removed his hand from Amu’s forehead, ruffled her hair, and handed her back her notepad. He put his hands in his pockets in his usual Brooding Fashion, and spoke in a would-be nonchalant manner, but his words sent Amu’s heart racing. 

“Yoru was staying with you, wasn’t he?” 

Did…. did this mean what Amu thought it meant….? Did Ikuto essentially Amu with his heart—? 

Shaking her head abruptly to get that thought out, Amu blustered and crossed her arms, putting on her Cool and Spicy act. “Well, I had no choice! Yoru is just like his owner, always crashing in my room without a word of consent from me!” 

Ran, Miki, and Yoru sighed discontentedly. Why was Amu so stubborn? 

At that moment, Su came flying up with a tray magically floating, holding several evening time snacks, a steaming teapot, and two cups, plus four miniature doll cups, no doubt borrowed from Ami’s dollhouse. 

“I heard Amu screaming and a boy’s voice and thought we must have company from Ikuto-kun and Yoru-kun!” Su announced happily to the room, oblivious to Amu’s furious blush and Ran and Miki’s giggles. “Here we go! Please, have some tea, Ikuto-kun! It’s been far too long!” 

“Thank you, Su-chan. You are far more reasonable than your loud-mouth owner–” 

“WHO ARE YOU CALLING LOUD-MOUTH?!” 

“Ugggggghhhhhh, this is getting painful….” Miki groaned, running her hands over her face. She turned to her fellow Character Guardian. “Ran, can you please do us all a favor and make Amu tell the truth?” 

For a moment, Ran blinked in confusion. Then, Su, who already set down the tray while Ikuto and Amu continued bickering, joined the conversation. “Oooh, yes, Ran! I don’t believe you ever Character Changed in front of Ikuto!” 

Something finally clicked into place in Ran’s head, and she gasped excitedly. “All right! Here we goooooo! Character Change from a Stubborn Girl to a Girl Who Expresses Her Feelings!” 

Sure enough, Amu’s hair clip magically changed into a heart shape with a cute “popping” sound. 

“Ikutooooooo, why didn’t you kiss me on the lips?! You had the perfect opportunity and you waaaaaasted it! Pleeeeeease gimme a real kiss!! Oh please! Oh please! Oh please!” 

Amu danced about the room, laughing joyfully, squealing, and running over to the very visibly startled Ikuto to lean down and give him the most eager puppydog eyes in existence. 

But of course, because her Character Change was with the enthusiastic Ran, despite her requests for kisses, Amu couldn’t stay still, hopping and jumping about the room, shouting out her love, squealing and spewing heart shapes everywhere. 

“Amu-chan….” Miki sighed. Su could only blush and hide her face in her apron. Ran, on the other hand, was so caught up in Amu’s physical hyperactiveness that she seemed to not notice her Bearer’s exceedingly bold and shocking confession, and only continued to cheer her on. 

(Yoru was busy drinking tea and munching on snacks to notice anything out of place.) 

Ikuto was the first one to snap out of it. He smirked. 

“If you insist,” he said in his usual smooth tone, standing up and catching Amu by the wrist and pulling her close…. and kissed her! 

Ran, Miki, and Su all screamed, causing Yoru to choke on his drink. 

Amu’s Character Change disappeared instantly, her eyes widening as she realized how close Ikuto’s face was to her own…. 

And wait….. was something…. against her mouth…..? It was warm and soft and….. Amu’s eyes fluttered closed, lost in the moment to comprehend anything alarming. 

The room around them disappeared, shimmering with a thousand radiant stars and hearts. Ikuto’s arm snaked around Amu’s waist and tugged her closer. Amu felt as if her legs were filled with jelly, only held up by Ikuto’s embrace. Who knew kissing would be so…. 

WAIT, WHAT?! KISSING?!?! 

Quickly she broke the kiss, gasping for breath. “I-I-I-Ikutooooo! How did — how dare you–?!” 

Further protests were smothered by another kiss. Amu’s whole body seemed to light on fire, but in… a pleasant sort of way. She only felt that way whenever Ikuto did other things to her in the past: biting her earlobe, holding her close in bed, lifting her up bridal style…. Amu whimpered against Ikuto’s lips (against Ikuto’s lips!) and found herself clinging to him, sliding her arms up his chest and clasping behind his neck as the kiss deepened, wondering how on earth she was supposed to live on knowing what this…. this…. this adult feeling was like! 

Finally, their kiss ended, and even Ikuto looked rather flushed. They stood, panting a little, gazing into each other’s eyes. 

“There. You finally came back down to Earth.” Ikuto’s tone was unusually hoarse, his indigo eyes burning intensely. 

“Th-thank you, I guess,” Amu gasped, feeling rather shaken by the intensity of his stare. Her knees wobbled heavily, threatening to give out any second. She clasped her hands tighter about Ikuto’s neck, longing to taste his lips again, but feeling far too flushed to do anything other than stare at the glistening moisture on his lips, knowing that she had caused that. “I— I don’t know what to say.” 

“If it makes you feel better, that was my first, too.” 

“Oh, was it —- EHHHHHHHHH?!” 

“Well. Only if you don’t count Utau being weird last year, which I really rather not count—” 

“W-W-W-W-WHOA WHOA WHOA, HOLD THE PHONE!” Amu shoved Ikuto away so hard, he toppled over one of her cushion chairs. 

“Your first kiss?! YOU?! Ikuto Tsukiyomi?! Y-y-you womanizing, perverted, flirtatious—” 

“Nice, insulting the guy who just kissed you within an inch of your life.” 

“---- all those times!! Flirting with me! A-a-and touching me! And m-making me f-feel things–!” 

“Oh, really? Do tell me more.” 

“SH-SHUT UP! YOU GET MY POINT, RIGHT?! How?! HOW?! Can that possibly be your first–?!” 

“Oh, just get over here,” Ikuto stood up and scooped up Amu in his arms, crossing over the room and sitting on her bed, positioning Amu so she was straddling his lap, her hands on his shoulders, looking down into his face. “Yes, you are my first real kiss, and yes, people can do other things besides kissing to know how to flirt, and I believe you are hot as hell for me right now, so why don’t you shut up and kiss me the way you want to?” 

Amu didn’t think it was possible to be more shocked, or to feel her body blaze up with that pleasant fire even more so, but gazing down at this mysterious, hot (yes, she could at least admit it now, after… everything), confusing, frustrating, lonely boy, she found herself ready to find out anything. 

“Ikuto…” she sighed, leaning down and meeting his lips, settling herself firmly in his lap as they expressed themselves at long last. 

~ 

Meanwhile, Ran, Miki, Su, and Yoru left the lovebirds alone, utterly embarrassed and unsure of how to respond. They eventually settled in the living room downstairs, hovering over the coffee table by the TV. 

Finally, after an uncomfortable silence, Miki spoke first. “W-well, Amu-chan is finally being, uh, honest….” 

“Y-y-yeah! Amu-chan spent too long being uncertain and confused and now she’s growing into the person she wants to be! Hehe…. yeahhhh….” Ran said in a half-hearted attempt of her usual boisterous mood, but trailed off, blushing furiously. 

“I think it’s so romantic, having her first kiss!” Su said happily. 

(The others sweated nervously, realizing Su was the only one oblivious of just how hot and heavy those two were getting it on.) 

“Ya know-nya, this is a lonnnnng time comin’,” Yoru said at last. “Ikuto has wanted to kiss Amu since the day they met.” 

“EHHHHHHH?!” Amu’s three Character Guardians exclaimed, all rounding on Yoru. 

“And you never told us?!” 

“Imagine how much heartache we could have avoided!” 

“Oh my! A kiss the day they met! How exciting!” 

“Ha!” Yoru scoffed. “Like telling y’all would’ve gone over well-nya! Amu-chan,” he added thoughtfully, “Amu-chan is…. Ikuto’s treasure. The only girl for Ikuto. So he was willing to wait, no matter how long it took. It just so happened that YOUR Character Change,” he rounded on Ran, who babbled nervously, “sped things up and now Ikuto is gonna feel bad!” 

“Ehhhhh?! B-b-b-but Miki told me to!” 

“Yeah, cuz I expected a confession, not a make-out session!” 

The three bickered and squabbled, while Su looked up towards the stairs leading to Amu’s room. Sure enough, another joined them, Dia, who had been resting in her egg during the earlier events, now looked far too pleased with herself to be anywhere near as embarrassed as the rest of them. 

“What makes you look so happy, Dia?” Su asked, flying up to greet her. 

Dia smiled serenely. “It’s more than just kisses going on upstairs. Amu-chan is opening her heart to Ikuto, and he, in turn, is doing the same. Her radiance is healing his heart.” 

[lampmanliveblogs]

”I must go now. My planet needs me.” -King, probably

(what's that under the collector's bed? i freaked out a little bit when I first saw it, because I thought it was philip, but nah, it looks like another stuffed animal. but can you imagine the kind of damage philip could do if he managed to possess the collector??)

As the space cherub and his island-in-training best friend take a break from their game of pretend, we cut to Boscha, who’s right in the middle of her own game of pretend. She is playing at being emperor. The school is her castle, and the gym is her throne room, complete with masked soldiers standing guard. She’s even got a special guard standing by her side, one with a shoulder pad on only one shoulder.

You know, when Kikimora said she wanted to be the new Golden Guard, I don’t think this is what she had in mind.

Because that’s Kikimora, right? It’s got to be, and the big guy is her Abomatron.

Speaking of Kikimora, I was cleaning up my desk a little while back when I found a note I had written and then completely forgot about, I think it might’ve been in response to an ask I got but never answered. The note read as thus:

”It’s ironic that Kikimora wanted to be the Golden Guard, seeing as the only privilege afforded the Golden Guard is that Belos will kill you personally, a courtesy he did not extend to Kikimora… and it came back to haunt him.” 

(except with more misspellings)

I gotta admit, as far as false names goes, Miki and Roka are kinda funny. We love a good word scramble. Actually, I don’t, I’m no good at those. This one wasn’t so hard because I knew the answer.

The thing I’m wondering though is how Kiki managed to fit that weird hand on her head under that wig.

The idea of Boscha taking them in after ”the incident” is reminiscent of the false backstory given the Golden Guard in season two.

I should probably also mention that Kiki-I’m sorry, I meant ”Miki.” When Jerbo was putting forth his plans to make things not suck for everyone, Miki interjected, saying that doing so would take up her time… and implying that without the constant protection of ”Miki” and ”Roka,” Boscha would be turned into a puppet and collected as well.

YO, is she gonna try to recreate the teleportation circle Philip used in Elsewhere and Elsewhen?!? See, I told you guys, I told you! I told you it’d be so cool if Luz or Lilith memorized it and used it, and no they’re doing it!

I mean, hopefully. Weeeeell… aside from the possibility that the teleportation circle will just outright fail (there was what, some twenty glyphs to it?), Kikimora might also have some objections. She might still have a grudge towards Hunter, for one thing. Or all the kids, for all the trouble they’ve caused her.

I dunno about you guys, but this is giving me Hollow Mind vibes. In the sense that I’m gonna spend way too long squinting at paintings in the background. I’ll be somewhat brief, because as per usual, I’ll probably get a better look at at least some of them in a sec.

Let’s see, what do we have here…

On the right side of the screen (King’s left) it appears to be mostly depictions of various space-related things. There is one with a shooting star or meteorite about to hit a planet’s surface, which might be the Collectors arriving at this world

The left side of the screen (King’s right) is where things get interesting. Going from closest to the screen to furthest away, we have…

A painting of three Collectors looking at what I assume is a depiction of the Demon Realm planet. There is a wee little collector coming up to them. This one is, aside from being smaller than the others, purple, where the others are blue. The little one is obviously supposed to be The Collector, our little Lord of the Fireflies.

The next painting shows two collectors holding and trying on Titan skulls. In the background is either a Titan, a Titan trapper, or the third collector disguised as a Titan. 

The third painting looks an awful lot like the mural we saw way back in Echoes of the Past. If we go by the ”collector dressed as a Titan” theory in the previous paragraph, then this painting might be depicting that collector in combat against a Titan. At the feet of the Titan is an egg, and we can see the head of a smaller Titan. So far, this seems to fall in line with the theory I put forth a little while ago, about the Titan Trappers worshipping not THE Collector, our Prince of Plastic, but another collector. One who gave them the idea of dressing up like their prey.

The fourth painting shows the three big collectors throwing away the littlest collector.

The fifth painting shows the little collector surrounded by baby Titans. D’aw!

The sixth… I really can’t tell, but I think I can see the three faces of the three tall collectors. Maybe it’s them leaving this planet and choosing to abandon the little one.

[glitchyred]

for the AMA:

glitchy, what are some of your favorite stims (do you know what stimming is? it's like comforting fidgeting)? i really like clapping and rocking back and forth.

Sorry the ama is over for now but I did want to answer this one ooc because I think about this a lot. Did some extra characters (all of which are autistic except Mike who's adhd) because again I just put a lot of thought into this and I want to talk about itNSJJAJS

Glitchy: Heavy focus on hand-fidgets. Most of his stims currently are negative-emotion based, unfortunately - scratching, aggressive rubbing, and pinching his arms when distressed. Idly flaps his hands when talking about something he's excited about. Would probably enjoy fidget cubes, especially ones with buttons. His favorite stim is probably pushing pens really hard into paper while drawing lol

Steven: Doesn't have a lot of noticable "action" stims because his emphasis is on proprioceptive stims. He used to require a weighted blanket to sleep (now he can do without but still prefers it), and on his Pokémon journey he would usually let Miki sleep (partially, as a Charizard) on top of him. Tugs his hair when stressed because the pressure on his scalp is soothing to him. This enjoyment of tactile pressure is part of why he's so physically affectionate with people

Mike: Repeated actions like opening/closing his locket, messing with light switches, locking and unlocking doors. Mild oral fixation that sometimes leads to overeating, but you'll find a lot of chewed up straws in his garbage lmao. Special shoutout to "organizing and reorganizing things in a way that only makes sense to him" as a side effect of collecting, but this has fallen to wayside a bit since collecting turned into something more akin to hoarding

Creeps: Similar to Glitchy, though he's usually pretty dissociated from his body and doesn't realize what it's doing most of the time. Also has more emphasis on motion; he's basically constantly fidgeting in some way, he struggles with sitting still lol.

Blake: His blunted senses, particularly tactile and proprioceptive, make him a pretty intense sensory-seeker. He likes to be squeezed really hard, often sits in weird-looking positions, and likes to rock back and forth intensely. Also loves warm things to the point where he will warm up mugs and stuff just so he can Hold Them

Leaf: TACTILE. Her fondness of soft things comes mostly from her obsession with texture. You'll pretty much always find her running her thumbs over the fabric of her dresses or petting her stuffed animals when she's at home. She becomes noticably more closed off and anxious when she can't rub her fingers against something.

[driftward]

Title: All I Want For Starlight is You Characters: Nyx Blackmoon, Klynt Gohtawyn Rating: Teen Summary: Nyx would like some company this holiday season. Notes: None

It is the decree of the Imperial Office of Culture that the Garlean celebration of the midwinter's feast, which takes place on the shortest day, is suitable for celebration for citizen and colonial residents alike, despite similar events recognized in uncivilized lands. Local Tribuni are encouraged to determine which customs are suitable for their region, and report back their decrees to the Office of Culture. Long live the Empire.

-*-

Perhaps years in the past, or in the years yet to come...

-*-

Klynt was among those who woke up early in the morn.

Well, 'woke up' was perhaps a bit of an exaggeration, but she was one of the first ones to be moving in the morning, owing to a life lived aboard pirate vessels, and more recently, perhaps due to the tendency of one Zoissette Vauban to be awake and quite active at an early hour.

However, Zoissette was not around this morn, nor was much of her usual company. The Starlight season was upon Eorzea, and many of her comrades had made their plans and set out on their way, to visit home and family, leaving her and a scant skeleton crew to hold down the fort.

This suited her fine, as she had little affection for the holiday. A pirate's life did not lend itself to such, and Limsans were hardly a formally devout sort, instead living life freely and developing loose collections of beliefs and superstitions, each fit to each person for them alone. Zoissette was probably off praying to some saint or another, and each of her other coworkers had their own affairs to look after and beliefs to tend to. Such was not for her.

And so, she made her way to the kitchen, barely aware of her surrounds as she began to make her morning coffee.

She felt, more than she heard, a gentle presence approach from behind her. She ignored it, focusing on watching the hot water as she poured it over finely ground beans.

"Gohtawyn. Good morning."

"Blackmoon. Morn," mumbled Klynt.

"Do you have plans for breakfast?"

Klynt scowled, wincing an eye shut as she looked into her coffee cup, now full.

"No. Should I?"

"No. Are there any activities or rituals you observe for the Starlight season?"

"...no. Should I?"

"No. If you do not mind, and you have the patience, I would like to prepare a breakfast for you appropriate for the season, in keeping with traditions I am familiar with."

Klynt grunted. "...do I get to keep my coffee?"

"Yes. Though if I may, I would like to see it for a moment."

Klynt arched an eyebrow, and frowned over at the Miqo'te shaped person. However, after a moment, she begrudgingly handed her mug over to Nyx.

Nyx took it, and set it down on the counter, and began to rapidly reach for a variety of spices, pouring them in various amounts into the coffee. Klynt was not awake enough to watch them very carefully, and she generally trusted Nyx.

She did protest, however, when she saw Nyx put two spoonfuls of milk into it.

"Hey, what're you doing?"

Nyx just looked up at her, and after a moment, handed the coffee back.

Klynt looked at it, dubious, but then took a sip. The coffee was spiced, now, with a mixture of flavors she did not recognize, and a smooth creaminess she did not expect.

It was... good.

She glowered at it, then nodded, and headed off to the breakfast area. Behind her, she heard Nyx get to work in the kitchen.

-*-

Kyb mal Donos set the declaration down, and looked at his assembled team.

"So does that mean...? asked Miki kir Karou tentatively, carefully.

Datum lux Lorimus shrugged. "Cato cares little what we do in his absence. He has chosen to take the solstice with his family. So long as we do not gain the attention of the local Legatus, I suspect we'll be fine. Keep your traditions, but keep them -quietly-, and I won't say a word."

Liana kir Vaux looked thoughtful. "A feast, then, for the beginning of Starlight."

Papanan turned to Liana, and raised a finger in the air. "And how do you propose we prepare such a thing? I doubt a one of you know how to properly prepare dodo tenderloin, and I shall not carry the burden of preparing the rest of the meal alone, thank you very much."

Liana crossed her arms. "Is that what passes for a fitting meal in your home? I would choose a wide array of common vegetables, filling and pleasing. And if you are not up to the culinary challenge of tending to the cohort-"

Miki waved his hands in the air, attempting to soothe them both before the conversation before it got out of hand. "Please, my friends, there is no need to fight. In this, a compromise is easy. Many hands shall make light work. And being as we all hail from different places, perhaps we shall each prepare a singular item of our choosing, and create a harmonious whole that may not otherwise be achieved. And being as we have much work ahead of us, might I suggest that we begin with breaking our fast upon the first day, followed by..."

Miki explained his intentions, and the others saw the wisdom of his plan, and were quick to agree. While some argument occurred around the preparation of a main dish, the rest of the discussion went quickly.

Nyx watched, and listened, silently.

-*-

Klynt was barely awake in the breakfast area, enjoying her coffee, when Nyx came out with several plates, each of them heaping with food. She near boggled as each of them were set down in front of her.

Dodo tenderloin, seared to perfection. Some sort of sautéed sauce made of some kind of orange fruit. Thin slices of, if she had to guess, a truly large radish. Mashed popotoes, with little bits of green in them - onion most like, or perhaps laurel, or, well, she stopped trying to guess. Strips of what she suspected was pork belly, heavily salted and fried. Some kind of squash, cut into thin stripes and cooked in some manner she was not familiar with. Scrambled eggs, because of course scrambled eggs, why wouldn't there be. And other food besides.

All in all, while any individual item seemed like it could be a delight, the entire plate was a mess of foods.

"Nyx," said Klynt, slowly, carefully, "The hells is this?"

"First breakfast," said Nyx, as she set a similar plate down in front of themselves and began to eat in their way, rapidly yet carefully, as though the plate was an enemy to be attacked with precision munitions and worn down through rapid attrition.

Klynt scowled, and picked up a utensil, and tried her own food.

Well. As she might've guessed. The arrangement may have looked more like an accident of whatever was available in the cabinet rather than any sort of planned meal, but Nyx was a uniquely capable culinarian. The food was delicious, and filling, and Klynt felt herself waking up as she ate her meal.

"Gohtawyn. Are you generally available for the day?"

"...sure. Don't got much going on, and most everyone's gone. Can't stray too far though. We're needed in case some emergency or another happens."

"I understand and agree. We will not need to go very far, but there is some work I would like to get done today. I would like your help with it. In addition, I would appreciate your aesthetic input."

Klynt frowned at Nyx. Nyx was usually so quiet in the mornings, content to hang around in the rafters, responding when called upon, or leaving to go do her own things, whatever they happened to be.

"Whatever are you up to, Nyx."

Nyx told her.

-*-

"We'll need a tree," said Liana, thoughtfully.

"A tree?" asked Miki.

"To put the presents under," supplied Liana.

"And to decorate," said Papanan, waving a finger in the air.

Miki looked perplexed, and Datum frowned at the other two, putting his hands on his hips.

"If this is part of some kind of savage ritual..." he said, slowly, carefully.

Papanan grinned, and shook his head. "Sure, but not of the religious sort."

"Not in recent years, anyroad, despite efforts," said Liana with a groan.

"Pah. Overblown and ancient belly-aching. No, it's just nice little things. We go out and buy presents, and put them under the Starlight tree. On the day of, we go, see who got what, and open them up."

"A... gift exchange, then?" asked Datum.

Liana nodded. "If you want to know the history of it, legend holds that a Saint of the Goddess Nymeia holds vigil on Starlight, giving presents to children and ferrying their prayers to her afterwards."

Datum put a hand to his forehead. "...if you get me in trouble-" he began.

"Nothing of the sort!" Said Papanan. "A gift exchange seems appropriate for your traditions as well. We will just say that the gifts are part of the feast. Giving thanks between each of us. And to the host as well, of course."

"Of course," said Datum, sourly. "And the trees?"

"Well," said Liana, smiling beatifically in her own way, "The inside of the Castrum is... rather bleak. I have always felt it could use some sprucing up. Rather than a singular tree, we can gather several, and claim it is just part of... general improvement."

Datum crossed his arms and frowned.

"Fine," he agreed at last. "But no decorations."

-*-

It was late afternoon, and Klynt trailed behind Nyx. It was cold, and there was snow on the ground, and her time in Ishgard had taught her to have somewhat more respect for the elements. So she had heavy leather boots on with thick soles, and a coat of Ishgardian make that Zoissette had gotten for her, and thick woolen mittens courtesy of Zoissette's brother, Ement. She had her thumbs stuck in her waistband as she sauntered after Nyx.

Nyx, of course, was in their armor. Something of Allagan make. Klynt had never asked much after it, and Nyx was never the sort to volunteer information unless prompted. It didn't matter. The weather never seemed to bother Nyx one way or another.

They stopped in the middle of a forest of evergreens, and Nyx looked around, her ears rotating slowly as she swept her gaze back and forth over the forest.

"I do not fully understand the selection criteria for evergreen trees," said Nyx. "I know it is important that they be tall, but less tall than the room they are to occupy. And their appearance must be aesthetically pleasing in a uniform manner. If you would indicate some, I shall inspect them. If we both agree on a tree, we can cut it down and transport it back."

Klynt shrugged.

"So... I just pick some?" she asked.

Nyx nodded, and she sighed. She also didn't know the 'selection criteria' for trees, so she poked through the forest, Nyx following silently behind. The first and second one, Nyx shook her head, and so she moved on. The third one, however, Nyx had circled several times, looking it up and down in her curious manner, eyes always wide open and staring, rarely blinking, with no expression on her face.

Klynt waited patiently.

"This one shall suffice," they declared.

Klynt and Nyx then spent the rest of the afternoon hewing it down and hauling it back home. The work passed mostly in silence, a situation Klynt would have found aggravatingly intolerable with most people.

But then again, Nyx was not most people. Nyx was Nyx, and Klynt found their silence companionable these days.

They deposited the tree into a storeroom, and Nyx began to fashion a stand for it.

"The tree will need to stay out here overnight. This storeroom shall keep it above freezing. In the morning, we can inspect it for animal urine or fecal matter, as well as any vilekin or plantkin that we will wish to avoid bringing indoors."

"Sure," said Klynt easily.

"Thank you for your assistance," said Nyx. "I will need some time to perform my work. I would appreciate speaking to you before you go to sleep for the evening, however."

"...sure," said Klynt, less easily. "...you gonna explain what all this is about?"

"I can explain later," said Nyx.

Odd, thought Klynt, but she let it be as she ambled out of the storage shed and back to the main holdings.

-*-

The trees were put carefully in various places in the Castrum. Nyx had helped the project scientists select them and bring them back, and they had build the stands for them. There were no presents nor decorations yet, but Nyx had been told those would come in the days to come.

After the last tree had been set up, Liana had come up to Nyx, and smiled at her warmly as she did, holding out a hand. Nyx knew what that meant, and reached out to take the woman's hand in her own.

"This is your first Starlight," said Liana.

"It is. I understand that it is a ritual of some sort. But I do not know the details or significance."

Papanan approached now, looking thoughtful. "Few rituals, actually," he said conversationally. "Interesting that most peoples have something-or-another around this time of year, isn't it?"

Liana looked at him, and nodded. "...yes. The Garleans do not recognize Starlight, but they do traditionally have a feast on the winter solstice that is very important to them."

"And us Ul'dahns take the opportunity to exchange gifts. Good for making friends, pleasing family, and for the merchants to make decent coin," said Papanan, grinning.

"As for my people... we hold the twelve in high regard. This is a celebration in the name of Nymeia, and her appointed saint. Miki could say more about the Doman tradition - their people do not care for it the same as ours do, but that stands to reason, given the difference in climate. They refer to it as longest night, and reflect upon the importance of some of their so-called kami, I believe."

Nyx looked at Liana. "Kami are a kind of eikon," she said. "Our mission opposes them."

"And the gods of Eorzea as well," said Papanan. "So we aren't celebrating them, not this year, not around here."

"But the celebration continues," said Liana. "I think... that perhaps, in the coldest part of winter, when the day is at its shortest, almost too short to do anything useful - particularly in the far north of Garlemald, but also elsewhere - that people turn to each other, and keep one another company, and celebrate that the days will only get longer from here. So the details, we're making them up here. Miki was right to try to find a harmonious balance between our many traditions. And the significance, well."

Liana smiled at Nyx, squeezing their hand tightly.

"It is a chance for us to spend time together. And this Starlight, all I want is to spend time with you. I've more to teach you, if you like. And I think you've more to learn, if you are willing."

"I am," said Nyx reflexively, and Liana smiled broadly while Papanan laughed.

"Going to teach it the real meaning of Starlight, are you?" he said.

Liana shrugged at him, with a smile. "And why not? She can learn."

Miki came over, noticing the group gathered together. "What's going on?" he asked.

"Oh, just all of us displaced savages, getting together to try to teach an ancient artifact a dozen different conflicting stories, and hope it'll learn something out of it," said Papanan.

Miki looked at Nyx, and then between Liana and Papanan.

"Is that wise?" he asked.

"Let the Garleans teach her how to be a weapon," said Liana. "Our duty should be to teach her how to be a person."

"And also to make sure it's working right," said Papanan.

Miki just shrugged.

-*-

Klynt stayed out in the main room, her fingers toying lazily with her nhalisman, her eyes half-lidded as she considered sleep.

But, she told Nyx she would speak with her before going to bed, and so she was awake, at least for a little while longer.

At last, Nyx returned.

"Gohtawyn. I appreciate you staying here. I will not keep you long. I am wondering if you plan on staying in the area for the next twelve days."

Klynt frowned. "...through Starlight, I take it."

"Yes," said Nyx, and then after a moment, "I would appreciate your company. There are rituals I wish to observe, and I believe they would be more meaningful if they were shared with someone. I would like that someone to be you, if possible."

"...sure," said Klynt. She wanted to ask more, but she was tired, and she wanted to go to bed.

"Thank you," said Nyx. They turned away, and looked up into the ceiling. Klynt knew, given another moment, they would leap up to the rafters and vanish for the evening.

"Nyx, I wanna ask you a question," said Klynt.

Nyx turned towards her. Staring. Unblinking. Klynt sighed, and rubbed the back of her head.

"It's quiet around here," she said. "Not a lotta people. Pretty lonely at night. If you want me to stick around, no problem, but if it's alright - I'd like company. Snuggle buddy or something."

Nyx regarded her flatly for a moment, then nodded. "I find your proposal agreeable. I shall meet you in your room. I need to perform personal maintenance and change."

Klynt nodded.

It was about a bell later. Klynt had climbed into her bed, topless but with her pants on, arms wrapped around her head, contemplating the ceiling. She heard the door open and then close, but no other noise, which told her all she needed to hear. She did not even need to look to watch as Nyx approached.

Nyx was wearing just her skinsuit, some kind of skintight smooth material. Klynt had assumed it was, in fact, Nyx's skin for much of the early time they had known each other. However, she had seen Nyx out of it a few times, either while performing maintenance, or engaged in intimate activities, the few times the two had indulged in such. Klynt was not interested in that tonight, however, and apparently neither was Nyx, who simply helped herself into Klynt's bed and curled up tightly in a ball next to her.

Klynt remembered the first few times she had shared a bed with Nyx. It was during the disastrous aftermath of events in Ul'dah, while they were still making their way towards Ishgard. Klynt had not dressed for the climate, and had come to regret that decision bitterly. Nyx had spent much of the time riding on Klynt's back. The physical exercise of carrying her had helped keep Klynt warm, but so had the gentle heat that Nyx radiated.

And when they had stopped to make camp, Nyx had curled up next to Klynt, much as she was now, and had radiated that same gentle heat, staving off the cold and helping Klynt go to sleep.

Klynt wrapped her arms around Nyx, and closed her eyes. Next to her, she knew Nyx was already asleep, as she could not feel her breathing. Yet another one of their quirks. Klynt remembered panicking the first time she had discovered such, and smiled faintly.

Nyx was a weird little creature. And she did not often ask for anything for herself. She would often ask other questions, about the mission, about parameters for a task, or for support in the mission, but rarely things for herself, as a person. So if Nyx wanted company for Starlight, well, Klynt was inclined to be obliging.

As she drifted off, luxuriating in the gentle heat radiating from her friend, Klynt resolved to ask more after what it was Nyx wanted with Starlight. But for now, she was tired, and so she drifted off to sleep.

[desmondkane-of-ao3-fame]

So I know you already technically did something like this but… Willow has a nightmare from when she was the collectors puppet, and she’s not handling it well. Guess whose gonna have to comfort her about it?

If I may, I’d like to use this as a way to showcase how both girls, as adults living together, handle this scenario. Because Skara would have plenty of reason to have nightmares herself.

Skara’s nightmares are sporadic, but they’ll be really bad when they happen. Sometimes it’s her being 15 again, working with Barcus and Matt to find supplies, before getting attacked and collected by drones. Sometimes it’s about ‘Miki,’ and being under Boscha’s thumbs, forced to endure harsh punishments for insubordination. And sometimes it’s about feeling guilty, where she imagines a collected pair of Amelia and Cat blaming her for not being out in the front lines, blaming her for why they spent two months in a horrific internal prison because of a child god. It doesn’t matter that the real Cat and Amelia have assured her none of this is her fault; her brain will think it was anyway and punish her accordingly.

But the worst nightmares are about her as an adult. Where she’s teaching her Baby Class, and in the middle of story time, a Collector drone smashes through the window. Skara tries to stop them, but an EC Scout tackles her to the ground. And all Skara can do is watch in horror as her class is collected, turned into puppets and dragged away to some stupid crown castle and-

Skara wakes up in tears from these nightmares, sometimes sobbing in her sleep and waking her wife Willow, who gently shakes her awake. Skara gets up, but she cant really do anything but continue crying. When this happens, Willow knows exactly what to do: Cuddling her Skary, she summons Clover to bring her the Emergency I-Scream in the freezer. Starberry flavored, Skara’s favorite. When Clover arrives, Skara chuckles and takes a new spoonfuls, calming down, before curling into Willow and addressing her nightmare. Willow simply listens, before taking Skara’s hand, squeezing it, and giving her knuckles a lil’ kiss. She promises Skara that she’s safe, that the Collector’s good now, and wouldn’t hurt her and their friends. She assures her that none of what happened at New Hexside was her fault, that she and the others were scared children, not knowing how to handle the end of the world any other way. Skara lays her head on Willow’s chest, using her wife’s heartbeat to ground her in reality. Willow cuddles her, holding her protectively, arms around her waist as she playfully threatens all the nightmares that may come for her! Skara gets one last smile out of that, before falling into a deep, lovely sleep, complete with a dream about her awesome wife being awesome.

Willow, however, has her own nightmares. Like Skara with Amelia and Cat, Willow imagines her dad, collected, begging to know why she didn’t save him. She imagines herself barely missing the Human World portal, the Collector grabbing her and turning her into a puppet. She imagines the empty void she felt trapped in when the Collector transformed her, and she starts to panic, feeling trapped and too weak to escape.

Worst, she imagines herself seeing Skara, trying to flee a Collector spy, before tripping and being collected. Shes able to stop the drone, but she can’t save her wife. She calls out to help, summons all her magic, but nothing turns her Skary back. Willow just the puppet of the woman she loves in her arms and cries tears of grief, rage, and sorrow.

Skara recognizes these nightmares because they’re the only time she wakes up to her nose being tickled by a vine. When she opens her eyes, she turns to see that a collection of plants from around the house are reaching out for a thrashing, pleasing Willow, muttering about how she can’t do it, she can’t stop this, she can’t save them.

Knowing that her wife is in pain, Skara summons her harp to calm her, to soothe her. She plays lullaby music she’ll play for her Baby Classes nap time, with the occasional flourishes to make the music more Willow’s style. As she plays, the vines retreat, Willow turns and tosses less, and soon enough she opens her eyes, first glowing green, then simply their normal, beautiful emerald color.

She clutches onto Skara, holding onto her whole world. She doesn’t always cry when she does. Sometimes she just needs to be anchored back in reality. But sometimes she needs a good, long cry, and that’s where Skara just holds her sobbing wife, feeling pained and guilty she can’t take this hurt away from her. All she can do is assure her that they’re safe, that Willow is safe, that Skara is safe, that everything is going to be ok.

Eventually Willow is able to calm herself enough that she lets go, pulling away, and thanking Skara for being there for her. Her wife nods, asking if she has any requests for her to play. Willow chooses something silly and simple, like Twinkle Twinkle Wailing Star, which Skara is happy to play for her. Willow falls asleep to Skara’s music. Skara then disappears her harp, before cuddling her wife and gently falling asleep alongside her.

[lavender-long-stories]

🌸 Will you marry me? 🌸

Spoilers for What He Left Behind | Chapter 18 | Rated T

“Da!” Miki reached up, begging to be picked up. A smile spread across Sasuke’s face, and he scooped Miki up and started attacking her with kisses. “It’s not fair to coach her.” Hinata giggled, tucking herself into the arm he held out.

“I made her a promise she had to hold up her end of the deal.” Sasuke handed Miki to Hinata, making Miki annoyed, but she wasn’t upset enough to fuss. Sasuke dug into a decoration that had been up since they moved, and he turned to them. Hinata curiously held her hand out when he offered it, and her heart stopped when she realized what it was. “Marry me?” Sasuke opened the ring box for her. Hinata swallowed. “This isn’t because…” No, he was trying to shape Miki’s first word for weeks. “I wasn’t expecting this.”  Sasuke hand brushed past her face to rest on the side of it. Waiting for her to collect her thoughts. “I … yes?” Hinata was pulled into a kiss. That pit in her stomach she thought she would have moving on with her life wasn’t here now.  Sasuke pulled back and took Miki, and held her up, making the little girl giggle. “We did it.”

Hinata put her hands on the sides of her face with the ring box in her fist. Why was she so happy with such a silly proposal? Hinata watched Sasuke celebrate with Miki, who was just happy to have him home, and sighed.

This was her happy ending.

FF.net  |  AO3

🌸 SasuHina Month 2023 - Day 31 🌸

@sasuhinamonth

[moonrisecalamityretreat]

I'll Go Onwards; I'll Walk Along With You | Jinpachi | Trial 5.6 | Re: Hanji, Loic, Mistrial

Jinpachi was on the brink of tears. He had to collect himself and take a breath. He was standing at the edge, teetering the balance between holding this falling structure of a psyche together with pulled and worn cables or just letting them go…letting them snap and fall down into a complete collapse of the mind.

The second option would be easier, to leave his body behind and become an observer that stood outside of this never ending onslaught of despair. Those threads were already loose and it would not take much of anything to slice through them…If…someone that he loved died here to a mistrial again…it just might be the last push needed to destroy the identity that was Jinpachi Otsuka.

The first option was harder…it’s harder to hold onto sanity than it is to give into the devil that was always at his ear. The first option required so much more effort, so much more strength than Jinpachi had left in his body. How much more can he take being beaten down? How much more can he take watching everyone in trial room suffer?

Guilt and despair is overwhelming. It thrashes about like an ocean that is pulling the man down under. If he could swim then maybe he’d have a 1 in a 1,000,000 chance to keep his head above the waves and make it back. But he can’t…so his chances drop to 1 in a 1,000,000,000.

Why fight those odds?

Why fight against the impossible?

Jinpachi knows that if he looked to his right for comfort they would tell him something so simple…

To have hope. To hold onto it tight. Hope will guide you to the 1 while despair tries to drag you to the 1,000,000,000…as long as you have hope…1 will always exist. Hope will strengthen the threads holding him together…hope will allow him to guide his mind back to his body even if those threads snap.

To have hope…to have that 1 will make falling to the 1,000,000,000 that much more painful…but still…he will hold onto it tightly in his hands.

He steps from his podium…he moves around Hanji to Hayato’s spot. The hawk had left from his roost here…so it was just the three of them left on this side. He walks to Futaba, taking her hand in his he takes her to Hanji…

He stands between them, grasping both of their hands tightly in his own and pulling them close to wrap their arms around him. With them here…he felt like he could take on the entire world. As if his fate wasn’t already sealed. He takes a moment to sniffle and bring his expression of depression into a soft smile.

[♫♫♫]

“I love you both so much…”

He states it clearly and concisely. That was what needed to be said…no words left unsaid.

He takes his attention to the rest of the room, he starts just going down the line of those that are left alive in this trial room.

“We might as well prepare ourselves for the inevitable…if it could be any of us then like Hanji-kun said…I really don’t want anything left unsaid if it ends up landing on me.”

He turns his expression to Kazuo.

“I don’t think we had many chances to really get close to each other, Hayashi-san. I appreciate everything you’ve done for us. Your tenacity and fighting spirit. If you survive here…then keep surviving and give The Shepherd hell for it.”

Then to Hayato

"What all is there to say about you? You're one tough guy that survived where many would've died. I've loved watching movies with you and...just enjoying how innocent you are."

Then it was to Ken.

“We promised each other…no matter what happens here…we’re gonna be okay. We both have a lot more to live for…If I go, then you gotta be happy for me…even if it’s hard. Denda-sensei…Sayuri-san…and me…we’re all gonna looking down on you and cheering for you. So do your best to be happy for us. And make the most of your life.”

Next was the twins.

“Miki-chan…you’ve become a really special friend to me. You know that I’ll have your back no matter what happens. You have so much to do out there in the world. Once The Shepherd is done…there’s a lot of work to be done out there. If you go…then I’ll carry it out.”

“And Tsuneo-san…I’ve enjoyed being your friend as well. Dancing with you was so much fun. Stick by Miki-chan’s side. I know you will…your twins after all. Twins shouldn’t ever be without their other half.”

Yuriko is next in line but…his attention instead goes to Loic first.

“Loic-san…we’re never going to like each other. We’re always going to butt heads but even so you’re inspiring. I’m sorry for everything we’ve become…Let’s just…like you said do our best.”

He can only hope that doesn’t fall on deaf ears as he comes to the star of the show.

“Yuriko-san…Live strongly for whoever dies here today. Never give up…the rest of us will see this through…you’re wonderful and powerful…keep that flower crown safe haha!”

He chuckles with everything said and done. He lets out a small sigh as he stops focusing on a certain person and moves to speak to the entire room as a whole.

“If we’re going to do this then we need to talk logistics. First, Mio-san most likely isn’t culpable and is the best option. If there is a twist and those bunnies find her at fault…there most likely won’t be an execution anyway. So, I agree with Loic-san that voting for it is our best option…Hanji-kun…Futaba-chan…I ask that you two please vote with me…I’ll need the support with this choice.”

He keeps his grip on them tightly.

Second, if Yuriko-san gets out of here we need to make sure that they’re prepared. Don’t forget that The Devout is still here in that mansion. They’ll need to be careful. Last time, I assume that Maxime-san was able to be picked up because the 1-1 among us was able to get enough information to their group that allowed them to track him down. If you’re listening now 1-1…I ask that you please do what you can to have them come rescue Yuriko-san. With the existence of The Devout, sooner would be better than later.“

Yuriko needs to be armed and ready…1-1 needs to have those wolf-masked individuals save them as soon as they can. What else is there left to say. Those were his main points…he thinks for a moment before once again taking a breath.

“I almost threw a fit…but I’m gonna have hope in the best outcome for us all. Working together…is much better than fighting…and hating each other.”

Working together will yield more results, even working alone will yield more results than just…turning to despair. More results than lashing out as he was prone to do…He can’t take back the things he’s said, the bridges he’s burned…but he can keep…standing tall with everyone…

With all this in mind, Jinpachi places the first vote…

[crispywizardtale]

[chimaerakitten]

I think there’s something really interesting in how Murderbot does not tell anyone about ART but ART tells everyone about Murderbot, because it’s two entirely opposite actions that are really demonstrative of the exact same care?

because ART like, ART doesn't have to keep secrets from its crew. It is capable of doing so but there’s never been a reason for it to assume that sharing stuff would get it hurt. On the other hand, ART collects and processes a LOT of data, and it constantly has to make judgement calls about what is important to share, what do I/the humans care about knowing? So for ART, telling its crew something is a mark of prioritizing that thing. Of course it tells them about it’s new best friend!

Murderbot, on the other hand, is the exact opposite. It sums the whole thing up pretty well in ASR when it says that it gave something away, and it can’t afford to do that because if it gives anything away then the rest of it is less protected. Anything MB shares is dangerous and could be used against it. It’s learned to hold everything it cares about close to its chest so they can't be taken away. It’s come a long way since ASR, but that kind of ingrained habit-turned-personality-trait doesn't just vanish. When Gurathin asks what it’s been up to in ES, Murderbot shows him a bunch of footage of things it doesn't care about--it doesn't reveal ART or Miki, two events/people that had a far greater impact on it. The fact that it tells nobody about ART, not even Mensah, shows how much it cares about ART.

(I also think it’s pretty telling that MB doesn’t tell Amena about ART until after ART is officially (presumed) dead and can’t be taken away anymore, and even then it frames the reveal as “the truth inadvertently came out.” MB does not want to reveal how much it’s hurting, how much it cared.)

[mamitomoesyandereblog]

Hello! It’s so nice to see someone who writes for yandere Pmmm! Could you do something for !yandere! Rebellion Sayaka Miki? Like no one talks about the mental glow up she gets. So mature and calculated than her past self. Maybe with a reader that goes by She/Her pronouns? If you can’t no worries! Gender neutral pronouns work too!

Another request so soon? How wonderful! I didn't expect so many requests to be honest, so this makes me really happy. Sayaka is second best girl for me; so just like with the Mami post I'll try my best! 💞

Tw;

Yandere stuff , unusual behaviours, mentions of kidnapping, manipulative behaviour

I don't support this kind of actions or behaviour in any way; this is just fiction and should remain fiction.

(Spoilers For Puella Magi Madoka Magica, both the series and movie, ahead)

💙Yandere! (Rebellion) Sayaka Miki x female reader headcannons 💙

This should be interesting; because Sayaka isn't the same as the series. After everything she's gone through and all these experiences she's changed to a more collected and mature version of herself; whilst still keeping that playful attitude of hers.

So; how did you two meet? Let's say that you two knew eachother already, before rebellion. You were Sayaka and Madoka's friend from another class and even though you didn't hang out that often you guys had a pretty good relationship.

It wasn't surprising when you two bumped into eachother. Unlike her your memories had been altered and everything was normal to you. You started hanging out more. When Sayaka wasn't with the others or fighting nightmares she'd come to you to talk about anything really. It was nice to be a normal school girl for a bit. She could do that when you were around.

To her surprise you start being aware of things. The city seems different, the people seem different. It's as if you're in a doll house; where everyone and everything is made out plastic. Sayaka wasn't made out of plastic though. So you clinged onto her and asked her to help you, or rather protect you, with teary eyes. That sparked something within her.

🎼 So what makes Sayaka's unusual obsession with you start growing is you asking her for help and becoming wary of this place. It reminds her that this is no field trip and things are going to get dangerous soon; with you in danger as well since you slowly figure out everything. With Nagisa being in her witch form and the other four not aware (for now) she's the only one who can protect you. She's your hero, your angel.

🎼 She'd be overprotective but not as overprotective as her past self would be. She's more sly, her energetic and childish personality would make it hard for you to catch on her weird tendencies. She'd stay stuff like "Stay close to me, just in case" or "I should come with you- you never know" with a playful giggle and a smile, making it sound adorable if anything. Just a girl who cares a lot about her friend (or possibly more), right?

🎼 Unlike Mami, Sayaka would be more touchy in public. She'd playfully hold your hand, give you a quick hug, run around you, it makes her look more childish and innocent. It's an act though. She's not as childish as she used to be. It makes you feel safer though and she knows that. The more she hides her true feelings the closer you get to her.

🎼 Since you're in a labyrinth with a bunch of familiars/clara dolls taking the place of most of the city's population there's not much chance of anyone hurting you. She's still paranoid though. One of her worries is the Clara dolls/familiars or Kyubey somehow finding out you're starting to catch onto everything and try to silence you. That's why she always tries to stay close.

🎼 If any of the other girls confronted her about her sudden attachment to you her reaction would depend on who it was out of the four. If it was Mami, Madoka or Kyoko she'd brush it off with a laugh, saying that she's just looking out for "civilians". If it was Homura she'd do the same, saying that you're just a small crush this time. Lying would only get Homura to be suspicious of her and she doesn't want that. Besides, it's not that serious.

🎼 Sometimes she'd get a bit frustrated with playing dumb, waiting for the right time to confront Homura and trying to keep you safe from basically everything. So the only person she could talk to would be Nagisa. She's the only one who has part of the same struggles as her and since she's still a child to some extent she probably wouldn't critique her about her weird obsession with you. Maybe tell her to focus more on their duties but not outright stop.

🎼 If either of you confessed to eachother and became official she'd totally get even more overprotective than before, even manipulative as well. Her charm is enough to assure you she's just being a caring girlfriend. She'd also definitely hold your hand all the time. If you asked her why she'd respond with "You and me both know most of the people in this city aren't normal, so I'm just keeping an eye out for you"

🎼 If you ever pushed her away to hangout with other people she'd be quick to remind you that at this point they're not people. They're not real, they're just something similar to placeholders. Why would you hangout with someone that isn't possibly even human? If you pushed her away to hangout with one of the other four or Hitomi she'd be less worried though. She'd still be worried when you're with Hitomi since she's not a magical girl though and if you started hanging out with Homura all the time she'd try to invite herself to your conversations or give you small hints of Homura being dangerous. Without making it obvious of course. In the end; it's all about your safety.

🎼 If you ever started dating someone else she wouldn't do anything about it, unless it wasn't a healthy relationship. She'd be sad but convince herself it's for the best. If that person is good to you and makes you happy it's fine. She'd probably stalk the person a bit to see if they truly are a good person or a person at all. They could be a familiar/clara doll. If that were the case she'd be quick to tell you, even taking you with her and making you stalk them together to prove it to you. She wants you to be happy, she truly does. But you're not safe around those...things.

🎼 Sayaka wouldn't decide to do something as drastic as kidnapping you easily. As previously stated she cares about your happiness and is above forcing you to stay with her if you decide you don't want her in your life anymore. Yes; she'd try to change your mind a couple of times but stop after some point. So she'd only do something like that if you managed to get yourself into danger all the time or someone like Kyubey or Clara dolls/familiars were after you. Also I can see her looking you in her house or your house with a magic barrier to keep you from leaving once Homura becomes a witch and they have to act out their plan.

🎼 When Homura re-writes the universe and majority of Sayaka's memories get re-written things are going to get tricky. She'd still fall for you at some point but things will be different. A lot of people debate whether she goes back to how she was in the series because of the scene she tears up upon seeing Kyosuke and Hitomi together. At first I thought that she genuinely missed them since she was part of the law of the circle for a long time but then I remembered that memory was probably removed or altered. So let's just leave it at that for now-

You've made it to the end! I hope you liked the headcannons dear anon and I apologize if anything wasn't to your liking ^^"

(I was a bit nervous because I'm not sure if Clara dolls or familiars were the ones who replaced most civilians, so I apologize if I wasn't accurate in any way. (• ▽ •;) )

Requests are still open once again and with that I'll see you next time. Have a wonderful day/night! ❣️

[the8gates]

The Bug Collector: Chapter Four - Dragonfly

Word Count: 8k

Warning(s): None.

When Kakashi is appointed as the Sixth Hokage, he reveals that Obito Uchiha did not die in the war and that he plans to offer his former a friend a chance at rehabilitation and redemption. The few people who are aware of this secret project are supportive of the effort. Expect for Reiko Miki.

After her mentor, Shikaku Nara, was killed during the war, Reiko struggled to come to terms with his death. This issue is only made worse when Obito is placed in the only other house on her street. With seemingly everyone against the idea of serving true justice, Reiko decides to take matters into her own hands and make the Uchiha pay for all of the crimes he committed.

However, there may be more grey in the black and white picture she’d painted than she originally anticipated.

 Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three - AO3 - Chapter Five

No, she didn’t feel bad. Not in the slightest. It didn’t matter if Obito was some virgin dressed up like he was going to his first school dance. At the very least, he’d get a decent date or two out of her before she ended his sorry life. This was like doing community service. She grinned, managing to cover her slight slip. 

“You look nice. Sorry, I didn’t really dress up… and is that a bottle of wine?”

She asked, gesturing to the bottle clutched in what she imagined was a sweaty fist. His dark eyes widened a bit, and he nodded, holding it out to her. 

“Yeah. Well. Half of one. It’s all I had on hand.”

Obito answered, but Reiko reached out to accept it anyway, lifting the glass from his hands and holding it gingerly in her palms as she read the label. The brand was a cheap one she was familiar with. Probably bought with the intention of clasping the neck of the bottle in his fist just so he could drown mouthful after mouthful. No care or concern for the taste, only chasing its effects. At least that was relatable. 

“I love this brand.”

Reiko commented, offering him a smile smile as she ushered him inside. He crossed over the threshold with a little hesitancy, dark eyes darting around the room as he assessed his surroundings. 

“It’s not much… but it’s home.”

Reiko offered, moving away from the front door and back towards the kitchen. He followed with ease, considering the open layout of her first floor. 

“I uh… I like it.”

Obito said, a little unsure of himself in that statement. Her home was a much different scene from her office. At work, everything had its rightful place and she took great care to make sure her space was tidy. Wiping down her desk once a day with different cleaners and dusting her bookshelves and cabinets weekly. It helped keep her mind clear and made sure she didn’t get overwhelmed. At home, however, she found comfort in decor and knickknacks. There were shelves of dusty books and trinkets she’d collected over the years. Throw blankets and pillows littered her couch and love seat. Magazines and coaster cluttered the space on her coffee table and her kitchen was full of hanging herbs and there was not a windowsill that didn’t contain some kind of fresh vegetable soaking in the sunlight. It was a little messy, but she liked to view it as ‘lived in’ and welcoming because her guests didn’t have to worry about taking up space. Everything else did. 

When they entered the kitchen, Reiko placed the bottle of wine on the table and returned to the counter. 

“You said you wanted to watch, so I haven’t started cooking yet. Hope you don’t mind the wait that comes along with being needlessly paranoid.”

She said over her shoulder, chuckling a bit as the teasing statement left her mouth. Obito was hovering behind her, staring down at her hands as she washed a colander full of spinach. But she didn’t know this until he spoke. 

“I don’t mind.”

He answered, causing her to jolt in surprise at his proximity. Reiko turned her head, looking up and over her shoulder at the tall man in shock, but he simply continued to watch her hands with a scrutinizing expression. 

“Yikes. Talk about awkward.”

Reiko turned back to the sink, turning the green leaves over as the water from the faucet poured down on them. So, he was really going to stand right behind her the entire she cooked.

“Uh, I hope you like fish… I planned on baked salmon and a spinach side salad.”

Reiko said, trying to start some kind of conversation to alleviate the strange tension in the room. Really, she wished it didn’t matter. This date was supposed to be a means to an end. But that end required her to get close, and she couldn’t exactly bridge the gap between them without being friendly. Obito made a sound behind her, a hum of approval. 

“Yes, that sounds good.”

He answered, and Reiko nodded, her tongue sticking to the insides of her teeth as she struggled to think of something else to say. His attitude had completely changed once they’d entered the kitchen. From shy and a little out of his depth to rather serious in an instant as he watched her prepare the food with a vigilance that turned the air around them into wet concrete. She needed him to relax, or she wouldn’t be able to. And being on edge would lead to a slip up. 

“I know you said you’d like to watch for the sake of feeling comfortable. But you’re making me a little nervous…”

Reiko chuckled, shutting the faucet off when the spinach was fully rinsed. Then, she turned around to face him, grinning as his eyes widened. In this position she realized just how close he was, having to crane her head back to look up at his face. Obito seemed to have the same reckoning, because a soft blush rose to accompany his stunned expression. 

“How about you just help me prepare the food instead? That way you can monitor everything, but you’re not just breathing down my neck.”

She suggested, raising her eyebrows when he simply stared at her for a beat too long. Then, she was nodding her head in a goading fashion, reaching forward without any further answer being needed. She grabbed the ends of his shirt sleeves, popping off the button on the cuff and rolling them up his forearms, one at a time. Obito sucked in a sharp breath, but he didn’t stop her as she exposed one white arm and one tan.

“Oh, smooth. A simple gesture. It’s demanding without being overly forward. It gives the impression that you’re in charge, you’re not afraid to touch him, and it’s endearing at the same time.”

Well, yeah. There was a reason she was good at this kind of operation in the past. Obito seemed shocked when she was done, his arms hanging in the air between them. Reiko let out a soft laugh, clapping a hand down on his shoulder and then nodding her head in the direction of fridge. 

“Alright. Go get me two lemons from the fridge.”

She instructed, turning back around to let him process what had just happened as she shook the colander of spinach to disperse any left over water. After a second of silence, the floorboards groaned with the shifting of his weight, and he crossed the kitchen to follow her command. When he returned, Reiko grabbed her cutting board from it’s hanging place on the wall and settled it on the counter next to her. 

“Slice them into thin discs. The knives are over there… and when you’re done, you see that cabinet by the stove? Grab the aluminum foil from there.”

She said, pointing out the locations of things for Obito. He nodded, grabbing one of the large knives from the block in front of him. That should keep him busy for a second while she continued on her own preparations. She pulled a large pot from an overhead cabinet, filling it with water and salt before preparing an ice bath in a bowl in the sink while the pot of water heated up. 

“So… do you… like your position as Jonin Commander?”

Obito suddenly asked as he carefully sliced the lemons in front of him, causing Reiko to glance up him as poured sesame seeds into a waiting frying pan. Small talk… that was a good first step. With their hands busy, it would be easier. 

“I do. Though, it’s really just a ton of paperwork at this point… peace between villages means less missions. Less missions means less strategizing and more bureaucracy.”

Reiko answered honestly, flicking on the burner to toast the sesame seeds on low heat. Then, as the water in the pot began to boil, she carefully transferred the spinach into the pot. It didn’t matter much if she spoke frankly with him. Dead men couldn’t tell secrets. 

“Do you prefer that? Strategizing?”

Obito questioned, finding his footing in the conversation somewhat as he delivered the question with more confidence. 

“It’s what I was trained for. Filing requisition forms from the local shopkeepers for security and scheduling lunch breaks just feels like a waste of my talents. But it is part of the job.”

Reiko stated, allowing the responses to flow easily. One on one conversations had always been easier for her, and if she could convince herself that this was a normal situation, she would play the part better. Though, she didn’t favor being on the receiving end of the questions. So, when Obito hummed a bit in agreement, she decided to turn the tables. 

“Do you have any plans? For the future, I mean.”

Reiko asked, quirking a brow as she glanced over at him. Obito’s hand stilled mid-slice, his wrist rolled at a strange angle as he kept the blade embedded in the fruit in front of him. In his eyes, this was a date with a massive elephant in the room. She’d never directly addressed it, but her position meant that she knew things about him. Or at least, how his presence in the village had come to pass. Her mentor being the former Jonin Commander meant that she knew all about the war. Though, in honesty, after Shikaku’s passing, the details became fuzzy and hard to keep track of. No communication had come out of the war zone until the battle was over. After that, she’d just been running on word of mouth and vague recollections of events that had transpired too quickly to recount with any certainty. 

Nevertheless, she knew who he was. He knew that. Really, her question was a test in a way. To see how well he could navigate this conversation after the fact. For no reason other than to satiate her own curiosity about a man who could have committed such heinous crimes and then moved on to live a life of obscure domesticity. 

Obito cleared his throat and furrowed his brow before continuing to slice through the lemon. 

“I’m not sure, yet. Things are different now… I know that I don’t want to return to the Shinobi ranks.”

He stated, a bite in his tone that managed to surprise her a bit. Like he was responding to an earlier conversation that she wasn’t privy too. Addressing a sore spot. 

“Kakashi probably said something to him about it. I mean, it’s only natural. He’s strong. One of the last remaining Uchiha. I would want him in the ranks too if I could swing it. Better to use that strength for the village’s gain than allow it to go to waste.”

Hm. Using all the parts of the animal, as he used to say. Whittle the bones into utensils. Reduce the fat to be used in candles and soaps. The meat for stews and the hides for clothing. From a strategic perspective, she could understand why Kakashi would want Obito on their side. However, it wasn’t strategy that propelled him forward. It was a personal agenda. One that led him to pursue an idealized version of his life. One where he and his friend had gotten to grow up in the Shinobi system together. Fighting side by side in battle and working together to protect the village. He was chasing a fantasy. 

“Why not? Think I’d be a bad boss?”

Reiko teased, smirking a bit as she removed the spinach from the boiling water, quickly transferring it to the ice bath in the sink. Obito let out a sound akin to a chuckle, and she saw the way he shook his head from the corner of her eye. 

“No. It’s just… ah, well, it’s complicated. That phase of my life has passed.”

He answered, opting to remain reserved in his response. But, honestly, his answer had piqued her curiosity a bit. Why would a man with the power to make the world kneel for him not want to continue to prove his prowess? He had almost ended the world as they knew it, and now he was shying away from the one job that would provide him with power? Still, she didn’t want to push him too far, so she nodded in agreement. 

“That’s a healthy mindset. There are some people who chase their glory days like mice on a wheel. Never getting anywhere because they’re too dense to realize that they’re just… running in circles."

Reiko said, surprising herself with the genuine comment. She hadn’t crafted her response to cater to his ears, it had been her honest thoughts on the situation. Well, as honest as they could be without giving away her intentions. Obito let out a soft chuckle next to her, moving to grab the foil like she’d requested. 

“Living in the past… I’ve just recently learned how damaging that can be.”

Obito stated, pulling Reiko’s attention again, her eye moving to catch him in her peripheral as he stilled again. This time, his hands just hovered above the cutting board, the knife laying below his outstretched palms as an unsure silence fell between them. So, he’d caught himself in a moment of near clarity as well. 

“Not what you were expecting?”

In an attempt to move away from truth and treacherous waters, Reiko cleared her throat.

“You can wipe that off and cut this spinach up.”

She instructed again, nodding down at the bowl in the sink. This seemed to pull him from his trance, and he gave a nod in the affirmative as she moved to pull the sesame seeds from the heat. This ‘date’ was strange for a number of reasons. She couldn’t very well ask the typical ice breaker questions. Where did you grow up? Any family? How’s work? But she had to start somewhere… maybe… 

“So, you’re friends with Kakashi, right?”

Reiko asked, pouring the sesame seeds into the same mortar and pestle she’d used a week prior to crush up the sleeping pills she’d baked into the bread she’d left him. Obito let out another snort at that, laying the wet spinach out on the cutting board. 

“Oh, here, pat it dry first.”

She added, grabbing a paper towel from the rack next to her and handing it to him. Obito took it with a more serious expression, doing as he was told. 

“Yeah, I guess we’re friends at this point… do you know him well?”

Obito questioned, and now it was Reiko’s turn to snort. 

“You could say that. He’s a pain in my ass.”

She answered, figuring a little light shit-talking would boost morale. And it was a success, drawing a genuine chuckle from the man next to her and she actually smiled at the sound. It was lighter than his normal speaking voice. Higher pitched and almost… sweet?

“God you’re lonely.”

“Mine too. But he means well… I think.”

Obito replied, drawing a light giggle from Reiko as well. She had her own thoughts on Kakashi, but no one could say that he didn’t do what he thought was best. It was never true malicious intent that led him astray. It would be easier to hate him if it was. 

“What’s the old saying? Good intentions pave the pathway to hell?”

—————————————

The conversation came easy after that point. For a while, they talked about their shared relationship with Kakashi. Obito even told a couple light hearted stories from their childhood. At one point, he’d bashfully asked her if she and Kakashi had ever been… involved. Though, he hadn’t been able to say the word before Reiko had cut him off with a laugh. Assuring him that Kakashi was a good friend but he was definitely not her type. It wasn’t a total lie. They’d fooled around a few times in the past, but it had never been more than a transaction born out of boredom. They got along well enough and they were both young and attractive. Nothing more. But telling Obito that might have scared him off. 

Several times throughout the night she could tell he was slightly under confident in himself. Occasionally, she would notice him attempting to cover the skin on his pale arm. Or reaching up to scratch his cheek, only to pull away quickly at the feeling of the scar tissue there. Like he was trying to minimize the amount of attention he drew to it. He would blush and stutter if she even made an attempt to flirt with him. Anytime she touched him, he would freeze in place, staring at where her fingers were connecting with his skin until she pulled away. It was clear that he was nervous and unsure of whether or not he deserved the attention. 

He didn’t. But she was working an angle, so she’d continued to banter with him until it felt like she was getting somewhere. Now, as he prepared to leave her home after their shared dinner, Reiko noticed that he was much more open and bubbly with a little wine in his system. He lingered by the front door, chuckling softly and flashing pearly white teeth as they said their goodbyes. 

“You know, I never thought… Well, I had a really good time tonight. I’m glad you couldn’t start your lawnmower.”

Obito said, a goofy smile on his face as he looked down at her. Reiko giggled in return, deciding she could push this one step further. Her hand came up to rub the back of her neck and she dropped her eyes sheepishly. 

“Ah… well, if we’re being honest, I may have undersold my own strength because I wanted a reason to talk to you.”

She replied, pulling her eyes back up at the end to catch the way his dark eyes widened in surprise. Obito’s mouth hung open for a minute, lips barely separated in stunned silence. Reiko continued to play coy, chuckling at his expression. 

“I thought it was pretty obvious… but I guess not. Sorry… is that weird?”

She asked, fishing for reassurance. He struggled with insecurities as well, so baiting the hook was a little too easy. Obito snapped his mouth shut, shaking his head wildly. 

“Oh! No! I mean… I didn’t know. But I’m glad you did it. You really went out of your way like that just to talk to me?”

He questioned, falling soft and dreamy near the end as his eyes relaxed and the alcohol in his system started to show its true colors. She could recognize that far away, glassy, look from a mile away. Emotional and honest. Liquor didn’t lie. Reiko nodded, morphing her own smile to match his. 

“Yeah… I saw you once or twice when you first moved in… and then you stopped to ask me about that basket Ms. Haruno left on your porch and I just… well, I thought you were really cute.”

Reiko admitted, again not a total lie. Over the course of the night, she’d come to think he was rather handsome. With his expressive eyes and plump lips that curved in a boyish fashion when he flashed her a smile with some pride in it. He had a tendency of appearing rather severe. Scowling with his straight eyebrows pinched into a high point and his jaw set. But she preferred the brief instances when he grinned unabashedly. Or the look he was fixing her with now. Wide eyed and stunned… almost innocent. 

“Fuck, Reiko. Get a grip.”

Right. God, she really was lonely to be thinking about his facial features in such a way. She stifled the thoughts, and it must have caused a change in atmosphere because Obito went from shocked to panicked in an instant. His white eyebrows curved upwards and his mouth moved like a fish out of water, gulping for air, hoping to taste the words he needed in the oxygen around them. 

“I- I think you’re cute too. Not… cute but uh… pretty?”

He struggled, spitting the words out like he didn’t have control over them. It had been a while since she’d heard those words, and Reiko’s response proved it. Her own eyes wrenching wide and her heart betraying her by stuttering in her chest. Despite her best efforts, a genuine smile crept across her face and she sunk her teeth into her bottom lip to try and stop it. 

“Well, thank you. So… you’d want to do this again, then?”

She asked, fighting her physical response to his words by throwing out the words that paved the way towards the ultimate goal. Obito nodded eagerly, tufts of white hair bouncing like a dogs ears flopping in excitement. 

“I’m free anytime. What about this weekend? I’ve got movies we could watch and maybe I could make dinner this time? It might not be as good as what you made but…”

Obito slowed to halt when he realized his words were running away from him, overly excited and sounding a little desperate. But Reiko only smiled in response. This weekend… perfect. So, she wouldn’t have to come across as the pushy one. He was eager and that worked in her favor. 

“That sounds perfect. Your house? Say… 7 o’clock, Friday?”

She suggested, and he grinned in response. The one that caused his dark eyes to light up and flooded his face with boyish charm. 

“Yeah! Uh… yeah, I’ll clean and… that should be fine.”

He answered, again stuttering as he tried to reel in his excitement and appear more aloof. Reiko chuckled again, leaning around him to open the front door and prevent them from standing in her foyer for any longer than necessary. The cool evening air rolled in and she pulled back to look up at him. 

“Then it’s a date. I’ll see you then, Obito. And thank you for tonight.”

She said, something within her spurring her to go one step further. She propped herself up on her tip toes, taking a bit of delight in the way Obito went ramrod stiff and his eyes nearly popped out of his skull. This would be the moment that would seal her intentions. Leave him wanting more. Make his brain flood with all of those sweet chemicals and blur any lingering doubts he had until they were barely visible. She leaned forward, her lips coming within a hair’s breadth of his, just close enough for her breath to ghost over his slightly agape mouth. Then, she curved to the side and planted gentle kiss to his scarred cheek. 

When she lowered herself to rest on the flat of her foot again, Obito’s entire face was bright red. Now he really did look like a fish out of water. She let out a giggle, resting her hand on his chest.

“Consider that a token of my gratitude. But if you really do clean and cook for me? Imagine how much more grateful I will be.”

She teased, wiggling her eyebrows a bit. To her surprise, the red on Obito’s face darkened further and she almost thought she could see the beading of sweat on his brow. Still, he remained silent. Choked on his own words. Reiko laughed, gently shoving his chest to snap him out of his trance. He took a shaky step backwards until he was standing on her front porch, just over the threshold. 

“I have work in the morning… but I will see you Friday.”

Reiko finished, smiling as she pulled back inside to gently shut the door in his face. But, even when the door was closed and he couldn’t see her face anymore, the smile remained for a beat. 

—————————————

“Rei, come here.”

Shikaku instructed from his seat behind his desk. He was staring down at a catalog of some kind, his finger tracing over thin paper as he fixed the magazine with a stern expression. Reiko rose from her own desk quickly, crossing the room in a few short steps. 

“Yes sir?”

She questioned, and he tapped the paper in front of him, drawing her eyes to the image he was fixated on. 

“That’s green, correct?”

He asked, and she squinted a bit before shaking her head. The picture that had caught his attention was an advertisement for small crib that one of the woodworking shops in the village could build to suit the purchaser. It was definitely not green. 

“No sir. That’s red. Cherry red.”

She advised, chuckling a bit when he pulled away from the paper with a sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose in mild frustration. 

“Why Yoshino put me in charge of gathering items for the nursery I’ll never know.”

He huffed, and Reiko hummed, grabbing her chair so she could sit at the corner of his desk. She pulled the magazine in front of her, looking down at the different options. Really, this was just a catalog for a woodwork shop. Not exactly filled with baby supplies. But they did build cribs, so she supposed he had to start somewhere. 

“She does know that you’re colorblind, right?”

Reiko replied, more an off handed comment as she pursued the different paint selections for the crib. The main photo had the crib painted a bright red, though she didn’t think it was the most appealing color. There were swatches of different options underneath, all labeled with a serial number, but no color names. Shikaku leaned back in his chair, bringing his hands up to rest behind his head as he stared at the ceiling. 

“Hm. I’m sure I’ve told her at some point.”

He answered, letting out a quiet yawn as Reiko reached for a pen from the cup on his desk. She began marking each colored box, labeling them so he could know which serial number to write down on the order form. After a minute, she slid the magazine back towards him, jabbing her finger down on the freshly dried ink. 

“There, I labeled them for you. I can fill out the order form too if you want.”

Reiko said as Shikaku sat forward in his seat to hunch over the magazine again. He squinted down at the neat hand writing on the magazine, then he pointed at the box she’d labeled ‘Olive Green’. 

“That’s green?”

He asked, a little disbelief in his tone. Again, Rei giggled and nodded, grinning when he shook his head with wide eyes, like she’d just shown him something he’d never seen before. Part of her wondered if he did these silly things just to keep her entertained. 

“You don’t have to fill out the form for me. I can handle it. You’re not my assistant. You’re my student.”

Shikaku added as Reiko rose from her chair to position it back at her desk. She gave a soft nod, but couldn’t help but see the irony in that statement. They’d spent two years together and a lot of the things she did could be considered the duties of an assistant. Running errands, filling out menial paperwork, filing reports and refilling his coffee if he needed. Though she didn’t mind. She was just glad to be in his presence and she knew that when it became her turn to take over his position, she would have to do all of those things on her own. Or find a ‘student’ of her own. 

“Though I may call on you to babysit from time to time.”

Shikaku included, a smirk on his ruggedly handsome face as he looked up at Rei through his lashes. She chuckled, nodding again before she move to gather both of their mugs. Coffee sounded nice and they would be here for another couple hours, waiting on an urgent report from a Jonin squad that was due to return from a mission this evening. 

“I wouldn’t expect anything else… are you excited? About the baby?”

She asked, grinning ear to ear as she stood in front of his desk. Yoshino was entering the final phase of her pregnancy. It would be a little over a month before Shikaku’s son was born. But he’d seemed stressed in recent weeks, and she knew it couldn’t be Yoshino’s pregnancy hormones running him into the dirt. Shikaku was a good husband. Patient, mild, and easy going. While Yoshino could be a little domineering and, for lack of a better term, naggy, Shikaku took it all in stride. Never once complaining or arguing back with her when she asked him to do something. So, it couldn’t be something that simple that had him dragging his feet in recent weeks. 

“Of course. We even settled on a name.”

Shikaku answered, though it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself. Reiko clutched the mugs to her chest, mouth forming a shocked ‘o’ shape. 

“Oh! What is it? If you’re allowed to say…”

She questioned, bustling with energy and butterflies at the idea of a baby. A name. It was all so wonderful in her eyes. 

“Shikamaru.”

Shikaku stated, and Reiko could have died right then. If she weren’t currently holding two coffee mugs, she would have clapped and bounced on her toes in excitement. 

“Oh, thats perfect! And we’ll have birthdays close together, won’t we?”

Rei gushed, drawing a nod from her mentor. 

“That’s right… yours is coming up isn’t it? September 12th?”

Shikaku clarified, and Rei nodded her head like it was on a spring, smile never faltering. 

“Yes sir. Ionichi said that makes me a Virgo.”

Reiko answered, Shikaku letting out a soft scoff in response. 

“For a man who understands the importance of facts and science, you would think he wouldn’t buy into that astrology non-sense.”

He huffed, but Reiko shrugged. Maybe it was a little silly, but there was some truth in what the other man had told her a few weeks ago when Shikaku had left her under his charge during a mission that needed his personal attention. She’d spent a few days with the leader of the Yamanaka Clan, helping him with small tasks and learning a little more about the Intelligence Unit. He was different from Shikaku in several ways. Her mentor was extremely intelligent, but it mostly pertained to strategizing and reading people. Inoichi was horrible at social interactions, though he tried his best. And his intelligence was more all encompassing. He knew a lot about everything, and when she’d asked where he’d learned about astrology, he’d said that he’d read a book on it several years ago. Though he recalled all of the specifics with perfect clarity. 

“He also said that, because you’re a Cancer, you resist change. And that you close off and retreat into yourself when you’re upset. I would say thats pretty accurate.”

Reiko responded, smiling a bit when he quirked a brow in her direction. If he didn’t want to talk about his recent moodiness, she wouldn’t make him. After all, she was only thirteen. Well, fourteen in a few weeks. There wasn’t much wisdom she could offer someone like him. Though, she didn’t mind to call things like she saw them as far as he was concerned. And she would definitely lend an ear if he needed to talk. Just like he’d done for her so many times before. So, she let him know that she’d picked up on his mood change without pushing for any information. When it seemed like he was going to allow the observation hang in the air, Rei turned on her heel to head for the office door. 

“I’m going to refill our coffees. Be right back.”

She said, only to get within a few inches of the door before Shikaku was calling her name. 

“Rei.”

Reiko turned around to face him again, cocking her head to the side in curiosity, letting out a soft ‘Yes sir?’ in reply. Shikaku regarded her for a moment, his eyebrows pulled down as he tried to figure out what he wanted to say. Or if he wanted to say anything at all. She was used to this by now, simply standing and waiting for him to collect his thoughts. When it clicked into place for him, Shikaku leaned back in his chair again with a sigh, his hands falling to his lap, but his eyes didn’t leave her. 

“Can I ask you something?”

He proposed, and Rei nodded, coming back towards his desk to settle the empty coffee mugs on the wood. 

“Of course, sir.”

Shikaku nodded in response, again tasting his words before he spat them out. But the silence wasn’t as long this time. 

“You’re young but… you probably know me better than anyone. Comes with the territory, considering all of the time we spend together… and maybe this is unprofessional but, from a strategic standpoint, I can’t think of a better person to ask.”

He started, effectively lodging Reiko’s heart in her throat. What was he going to ask her? Unprofessional? She knew him better than anyone else? Even his wife? His friends? Her cheeks felt hotter, but she managed to maintain a doe-eyed, curious, stare. 

“Based on the time you’ve spent with me… do you think I will be a good father?”

Shikaku finally asked, the question like a punch in the stomach, though she wasn’t quite sure why. The confusing excitement that had built up in her chest a literal second prior had come crashing down to her stomach, melting into confusing nausea and disappointment. It took her a moment to collect her thoughts and respond to him. Of course he wasn’t going to ask what she thought he would… that would be silly. Still, she managed to find her footing and respond with ease, not allowing him to know about the conflicting feelings she was dealing with. 

“Of course I do. You’re patient and kind and brilliant… I mean, I honestly couldn’t imagine a better father. And if you raise a child that grows up to be anything like you… I would say that would be a huge success. That’s a silly thing to ask.”

Reiko answered, smiling the whole way through. She wouldn’t lie to him. He’d told her early on that he didn’t appreciate liars and that he could always tell when someone was lying to him. Or sugar coating something to preserve feelings. Sometimes, it was necessary. But he’d made sure that she knew that, in his presence, she didn’t need to worry about those trivial things. If she had an honest opinion to share, she was free to voice it. 

Shikaku sat in silence for a moment more, turning over the words in his head and searching her face for any sign of betrayal. Eventually, though, he let out a relieved sigh, his shoulders sagging forward as his eyes fell shut. 

“I suppose I’ve just been worrying over nothing. It’s a lot to consider all at once… but you’ll understand when you start a family of your own. Thank you, Rei. I know I can trust you to be honest with me.”

Shikaku replied, and she gave a nod, swallowing the knot in her throat but holding the smile on her face. 

“Always.”

She replied, and he let out a grateful hum before he picked his head up, the tension from the air dissipating with another deep breath. He nodded, reassuring himself as well before scooting forward in his chair to tackle the catalog again. 

“Alright. Go get the coffee… and when you get back… maybe you can help me fill out this form.”

He instructed, drawing a genuine chuckle from Reiko in the process. The wave of disappointment had passed and things could go back to normal now. 

“Yes sir.”

She answered, and he stopped her one more time before she left the office. 

“Oh, and be thinking about what you want for your birthday. What kind of mentor slash future father would I be if I didn’t get you a gift?”

Reiko glanced over at the vacant desk in the office. Left uninhabited since the Fourth Shinobi War had begun. It was free of any dust because Reiko liked to keep things tidy, but everything else was exactly as he’d left it. Once a week, she would lift every item from the wood with care, wiping down the surface underneath, before settling it back exactly as it had been before. Shikaku’s white coffee mug, the interior stained from decades of steady use. The cup of pens, pencils, and markers that sat on the corner. His large calendar, permanently fixed on October, filled with several meetings and events she’d had to attend on his behalf afterwards. If she stared long enough, she could almost imagine him sitting there. Hunched over a scroll, mumbling the words he was reading out loud. 

A knock on her office door pulled her from her trance and she jerked her head towards the direction of the sound. 

“Come in.”

She called, clearing her throat and shaking her head to dispel any further thoughts. Friday had come quickly and she had found herself increasingly distracted as her second date with Obito loomed.  All week she’d been going back and forth on the plan. The sooner she could seal the deal and sleep with him, the sooner she could catch him off guard in his sleep. But he was inexperienced and cautious, self conscious and nervous. Even if he was attracted to her, she didn’t think it would be easy to bed him that quick. If she pushed too hard, too fast, she might blow the mission all together. Eventually, she’d just settled on the plan for the evening being getting closer to him physically. Curling up next to him on the couch or just initiating more contact in general. Kissing him properly at the end of the night. 

All of this planning had resulted in her being a little air headed throughout the week. She’d struggled to get paperwork done, her mind wandering back to the first date with Obito. Just so she could pick apart the scene and analyze his movements better. She thought about the feeling of his scarred cheek against her lips. Wondering if the scar tissue on his neck would be any tougher to cut through.

And, for some reason, she’d been thinking about Shikaku non-stop. Getting lost in memories and reminiscing until those visions blurred with reality. Honestly, it was insanely frustrating to not have control over her mind. The door began to creek open and she realized she was doing it again, even in the brief seconds between her answering the knock and the door opening. 

“Hey, Rei, it’s me.”

A young voice introduced, the door opening to reveal Shikamaru. Without much thought, she breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of spiky haired boy. When he entered the office, he carefully shut the door behind him. 

“Oh, good. I was worried it might be Kakashi. He hasn’t left me alone all week.”

Reiko sighed, and that was the truth. Ever since her ‘date’ with Obito, Lord Sixth had been a royal pain in her ass. He’d asked her for details on the date. How things had gone. If there was going to be another one. Trying to play some weird match maker by giving her advice on how to get closer to Obito. Now, her head was full of useless information. Obito liked hard candy, but he hated chocolate. If he was drinking, he preferred lighter alcohol to heavy liquor. He hated horror movies but seemed to have a particular fondness for romantic comedies. He didn’t read much, but he’d loved comic books when they were kids. The list went on and on, and other than using the tidbits to get a little closer to Obito, the information served no purpose. 

“What’s he bothering ya about this time? Didn’t know where to find the extra staples?”

Shikamaru quipped, sitting down in the chair across from her desk with ease. He reclined back, balancing on the back legs of the chair as Reiko let out a chuckle. 

“No, it wasn’t office supply related. Thankfully. I didn’t think we were going to recover from the week he spent painstakingly taking inventory of every pen, piece of paper, and folder in this building.”

Rei responded, leaning forward to rest her arms on her desk. Shikamaru let out a scoff at that, dropping his head back to stare up at the ceiling. Her godson had this easy approach to life she could never understand. He came into her office and all but kicked his feet up on her desk, relaxing in his chair without a single thought about how he conducted himself. Whenever she went out in public, Reiko sat as still as she could. Obsessively placing herself in a way that would take up the least amount of space and always hyper focused on the area around her. She couldn’t imagine how Shikamaru could just be and not have any concerns about how he was perceived. It would be easy to blame it on the swaggering confidence that youth inspired… but even at his age she’d been-

“Neurotic?”

Ah, there he was. Just on time. 

“You know he just did that to avoid doing any real work, right?”

Shikamaru pointed out, but it wasn’t necessary. Reiko hummed, nodding in agreement. 

“If he worked half as hard on his regular duties as he did avoiding them… well, we’d be the most advanced Village in the world.”

Rei sighed, drawing a quiet chuckle from Shikamaru in the process. He let his chair fall forward, but was quick to catch himself so the front legs didn’t slam against the ground. 

“Mom wanted me to come ask if you wanted to come over for dinner tonight.”

He said, addressing the reason he’d come here. Reiko was quick to shake her head, moving her hands to gather the papers in front of her as she denied the invitation. 

“I can’t tonight.”

She answered, glancing up just in time to see the concerned look he was giving her. Then the briefest shifting of his eyes towards what used to be his father’s desk. Ah. 

“It’s just… well, mom’s all torn up. Because you haven’t come around since-“

Shikamaru started to say, but she cut him off. 

“Shika, I’m fine. Seriously. I can’t come tonight because… I have a date.”

She admitted after little thought. At this point, she would say anything to avoid this conversation. 

“You probably should have that conversation. You haven’t been to see him or Yoshino since the funeral. Sure, you’ve run into Shika around the village, but that was never intentional. And he knows that. You know that. Why are you avoiding them?”

Shikamaru actually quirked a brow at that, a teasing smirk crawling across his face. Sometimes, he looked so much like Shikaku it made her sick. Her breath stuttering when her eyes registered something her brain knew wasn’t true. Before he’d passed, she’d seen the resemblance. Everyone had. But now it felt more surreal. Like she was looking at a dead man. 

“You? A date? Yeah right.”

Shikamaru huffed, sitting back and crossing his arms over his chest. Reiko opened her mouth in mock shock, but she smiled a bit as well. 

“What are you saying? That the idea of me having a date isn’t plausible?”

She questioned, and he shrugged, his thin eyebrows furrowing as his eyes drifted shut in concentration. They even had the same thinking face. 

“Well, I’ve know you my whole life, and never once have you mentioned dates or boys. Honestly? I thought you weren’t into guys.”

Shikamaru said, pulling a light hearted scoff from Reiko as she moved to continue putting her desk in order. Honestly, he had a point. Reiko’s ‘experience’ with relationships and sex was almost solely based on the few times she’d used those things to get information. When she was a teen, she’d tried her hand at dates and had even managed to maintain a relationship with a boy who worked at a coffee shop near the Hokage Tower. But that had only lasted for a couple months. In the end, he’d come to surprise her at work and had run into Shikaku. She’d promptly bitten the kid’s head off for embarrassing her and had dumped him the same day. But Shikamaru wouldn’t have known anything about that. Shortly after the incident, she’d just decided that dating didn’t matter to her as much as work did. 

The situation with Kakashi was different. That had only happened a handful of times and each encounter was more distant than the last. In fact, the last time, Reiko had left his apartment while he was in the bathroom cleaning up after their romp. Not even bothering to say goodnight. 

“Yeah, well, I do enjoy men. I just never had the time before.”

Reiko defended, mostly because that seemed like a plausible excuse. Not because it held any real truth. 

“And you do now?”

Shikamaru fired back, quick as a whip. It was a curse to be that smart. For everyone involved. She knew his statement about Yoshino being worried sick earlier was a thinly veiled attempt at sharing his own feelings. He probably felt slighted by her sudden absence from his life as well. So, he thought her explanation of having a ‘date’ didn’t hold up under scrutiny and that it was just another excuse for her to avoid him and his mother. But it was the truth. And if he knew why this date was so important, he wouldn’t feel as jilted. If he knew that she was seeing the man who had been indirectly responsible for his father’s death just so she could get close enough to kill him and dole out some much deserved justice… he would understand then. But she couldn’t tell him that now. 

“Quit trying to poke holes in my story. Yes, I have time tonight for a date. Yes, I am going on a real date with a real man. It has nothing to do with you and your mother. I’ll let you know when I’m free again.”

Reiko said, snapping the words out in an attempt to get him to back off and stop asking questions. Shikamaru’s curiosity could blow the mission, and she was doing this for both of them. For Yoshino too. If she had to keep her distance and be a little harsh, then so be it. Even if she hadn’t seen them in a while, she loved them like her own family. And nothing could get in the way of her doing them a service. 

“If you loved them, wouldn’t you try to be there for them? Instead of running and hiding because you can’t stand to face them? Just because Shika looks like me and you can’t handle that. Is it because you feel guilty? Like you could have done something that would have made things different? What if they don't want you to do this? Would you stop if they asked you to?”

Shikamaru’s eyes widened for a brief second before he trained his face back to neutral, letting out a soft huff in defiance. 

“Yeah, alright. Whatever you say.”

He rose from his chair, stuffing his hands into his pants pocket as he jutted his hips forward, leaning back with a simple shrug of his shoulders. Then, he sauntered over towards the door, pulling it open with ease. But, before he could leave, he turned around one last time. His dark eyes filtering between Shikaku’s old desk and where Reiko was currently seated at her own. 

“Ya know… we miss him too.”

He said, his final attempt to bridge the gap. It was simple and honest, but it still made Reiko’s throat ache. Her teeth ground together as her jaw locked tight, preventing her from saying anything that could remedy the situation. She’d followed his gaze to the vacant desk, and that’s where it remained when Shikamaru had decided he wasn’t going to wait for a reply. The door shut behind him with a quiet click and she was left alone with Shikaku again. 

-----------------------------------

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[sunlightandsuffering]

I LEAVE FOR A WHILE AND I HAVE SO MANY UNREAD BESTIES TO LOVERS ANONS!!! Imma answer them when I get back from boating but Jfc y’all want this AU bad so here, theres no smut per se but this is the first part of the first chapter from Mikasa’s POV I hope I characterized her okay, I’m trying to stay true to the collective vision 😂

So without further ado Besties to Lovers 💕💕

Her and Eren have always been friends, but she wants the benefits, God does she want the benefits. She’s nineteen, in her second year of university and she’s still a virgin and has done absolutely nothing outside of kiss a boy, and that boy was Eren, in the eighth grade. Meanwhile the very object of her affections has a new girl in his room every fucking night. She doesn’t understand where he gets his stamina from or where he finds all of these girls.

They’ve been best friends since the third grade when he forced her to eat a mudpie because he told poor sweet naïve Mikasa it was chocolate cake. When she’d cried after having her face shoved into the mud, he’d told her to suck it up before giving her the lollipop from his lunchbox as penance. She’s loved him ever since.

And unfortunately, his selfish antics have only gotten worse over time.

Mikasa is aware she’s unbelievably sheltered, it’s not something new to her, that’s what happens when you live with three ex-cops for most of your life and the only friend, you’re permitted to hang out with on a continual basis is Eren. As a result, she’s spoiled rotten and she loves every moment of it, especially when it’s Eren doing the spoiling, but she’s trying her best to be less sheltered! She even finally got a job recently and Eren had told her how proud of her he was.

The job might also be part-time at Levi’s mechanic shop but well a job is a job it doesn’t matter if she got it through nepotism.

She’s excited about it, it means she gets to see Eren even more than usual because he works there part time as a mechanic while he puts himself through medical school.

She knows logically she should be fed up of the boy she’s spent almost every waking moment with since she was seven, but she’s not, she loves living with Eren.

He spoils her almost more than Levi, Hanji and Kenny do, which is impressive because they’re all a little crazy.

She’s also a little in love with Eren if she’s being entirely honest with herself, she lives for when he calls her ‘baby’ and his fingers trail up her thighs and he pinches the curve of her ass, telling her the gym is paying off. He’s always touch, touch, touching every part of her he can get his hands on and she loves it.

Once, Jean had tried to have her sit on his lap too when Eren hadn’t been around and although she’d felt a little weird about it, she’d complied because well he was her friend and it was okay when Eren did it, so why not Jean?

Eren had not been pleased.

Mikasa hadn’t liked it either if she was being honest, it wasn’t the same, he didn’t hold her the same way Eren did and she didn’t have the same pleasant little flutter in her tummy the way she did with Eren when his hands would dip between her thighs and along the seams of her underwear beneath her flowy dresses.

She always felt happy and warm whenever Eren touched her and if she ever felt uncomfortable he’d stop, but he was also more than happy to soothe her back to happiness, he’d kiss her neck or tell her how good she was being for him and she’d be content once again.

Sometimes she’d wriggle around in his lap and he’d hold her tight, and give her a little nibble to her ear as warning. Sometimes she’d heed his warning and sometimes she wouldn’t but when she didn’t that’s usually when Eren would take her home and she loved being alone with him much more than at a boring party while he flirted with a bunch of girls.

When she had him entirely to herself, that was when she was most happy. But these days it wasn’t often, it seemed somehow her best friend had become even more of a man whore since she’d moved in. It’d been a year and still he hadn’t cooled down, he had more sexual partners than an emperor with a harem, it was ridiculous.

The revolving door of girls was getting old for a variety of reasons, not the least of which was that she was fed up of having to explain where the coffee was as the girls pranced around their kitchen in underwear and Eren’s t-shirts. It was irritating, they didn’t understand that she would be the one to make Eren coffee or tea in the morning and that she had exclusive access to his wardrobe. The pretty blonde bitch she was glaring at right now should NOT be wearing her favourite t-shirt.

She sullenly continues to steep Eren’s tea for him, knowing he’ll need the caffeine when he wakes up while she watches the pretty little blonde march around their kitchen like she owns the place. She grabs all of Mikasa’s iced coffee ingredients from the fridge, drowning two cups of scalding hot coffee in sugary sweet. Syrup, whip cream, sprinkles, everything Eren buys Mikasa because he understands her ice coffee obsession. Meanwhile Mikasa knows for a fact Eren loathes the stuff, he tells her it’s too sweet all the time, making faces every time he steals a sip, as if it will taste different than the last time he drank it. He always gives her little cheek kisses after, awfully close to her lips or on her nose, tells her she’s sweet enough for him, that he doesn’t need anything else.

And without fail she’ll squirm and blush under his praise just like she always does and he’ll get that look in his eye, the one that’s dark and hungry that she knows usually precedes some manhandling. A slap to the ass, a pinch to her waist, something that allows him the excuse to touch her and she lives for it, sometimes if she’s really lucky he’ll tuck her into his lap and let her drink the rest of her coffee from her favourite seat there.

She’s startled out of her thoughts as the blonde girl drops two spoons onto the counter and they clatter against the marble with an angry noise, leaving spills of coffee in their wake.

“Can you be a doll and clean that up for me?” Platinum blonde asks her before she picks up both mugs and starts towards Eren’s room.

Mikasa frowns but wanders towards the sink to grab a washcloth for the mess.

Platinum blonde doesn’t make it two steps out of the kitchen before Eren’s bedroom door opens and shuts and he’s wandering into the open expanse of their kitchen wearing nothing more than a pair of plaid pyjama pants and rubbing his eyes.

Mikasa smirks at the sink, now is her favourite time of the morning, when Eren will kick out the little blonde rather brutally.

“Eren, hi!” The girl tells him breathlessly, and Mikasa turns to watch her hold out a coffee, “I made you a coffee, wasn’t sure what you liked.”

Shit, Eren’s tea! Mikasa drops her wash cloth and quickly removes the tea bag from Eren’s typical Earl Grey, thankfully it’s not too oversteeped. She wanders to the fridge to grab the cream, pretending not to be gleefully listening to the conversation next to her.

Eren takes the coffee from the girl, looking down at it as if it’s going to explode, sprinkles and chocolate shavings floating around the milky brown mixture. He raises an eyebrow up at the girl before placing the coffee on the counter, “Thanks, but I don’t like coffee.”

The girl’s eyes go a little wide and she places her mug on the counter as well, “Oh I didn’t know, tell me what you do like and I’ll make it for you, I wanted you to have a little pick me up, you know after last night,” She sends him a little smirk as she finishes her sentence but Eren remains looking unimpressed.

“I like tea, but don’t worry about it, I already have some being made right now, isn’t that right Miki?”

His eyes finally slide to hers and as usual her heart skips a beat as those intent viridians watch her so intensely, all of his attention is on her, he pays absolutely no mind to the blonde girl as he makes it to her side in a few steps.

She nods softly, she doesn’t want to reply, not in front of this girl, she’s too shy, it’s why she’s barely said three words to her yet. She hands Eren his cup of tea and he grins mischievously at her, before taking it from her hands. He winks at her before leaning in to kiss her cheek, murmuring into her ear softly, “Thanks Miki.”

Shivers erupt all over as his breath hits just under her ear, where he knows she’s most sensitive.

He pulls away and she’s left wide-eyed as he steals his tea and turns back to the blonde girl.

“Sorry what was your name again?”

The blonde’s face scrunches up in irritation, “It’s Katrina.”

“Great, Katrina I’ll walk you out.”

He takes a sip of his tea before leaving it on the counter and grabbing Katrina by the arm and dragging her towards his bedroom. They stop briefly to grab Katrina’s things before making their way to the door, Eren likely hoping to avoid her impending meltdown.

Mikasa doesn’t see it but she hears the irritated whines that turn into pleads as Eren tells the girl not so gently, to leave. The door slams and she hears footsteps as Eren follows the girl outside. Mikasa may or may not scoot a little closer to the main hallway and press her ear to the door to listen.

“But we had such an amazing night—”

“It was okay.” Eren throws in his two cents and Mikasa fights to keep in her giggle, this is her favourite part of the mornings, it’s almost worth all the pain of the night before just for this.

“What do you mean, it was amazing, Eren I think we really have something, it was so amazing—”

“Listen, I don’t do relationships, I do one-night stands and that’s it.” Eren tells Katrina firmly and Mikasa gives a little fist pump, damn right, she never sees the same girl twice and she’ll never admit how happy that small tidbit of information brings her. If he’s going to have someone else, at least she knows he has no feelings attached to it. The day he gets a serious girlfriend is the day her heart really breaks.

“What about the girl in there, Miki you called her, don’t tell me you’re not fucking her.”

Mikasa is shocked, her cheeks turning red at the assumption, how vulgar.

But also a small part of her wishes Eren was, ‘fucking’ her that is. She’s a virgin, completely innocent in every conceivable way, she’s never even touched herself, nineteen and still totally clueless with all things sex. It’s not like she hasn’t considered it or wanted to try before, she’s not a prude, she just has no idea where to even start.

Not to mention, ANY male love interests are squashed like bugs the second Eren gets wind of them, and if it’s not him it’s Levi, Kenny or Hanji.

But lately she’s considering at least buying a vibrator or something, maybe taking her own virginity, Sasha and Annie never shut up about it, she’s curious about what all the fuss is about. Every time she moves her fingers down her stomach, she heats up a little, blushing bright red and wondering if it’s wrong, if its weird.

She usually makes it to the line of her panties, concentrated on trying to figure out what she should do and imagining what she thinks will turn her on, and of course it’s always Eren. Always, always him. Unfortunately, that’s usually where her fingers stop because she feels awful, dirty for imagining her best friend touching her, thinking about his large frame looming over hers and laying kisses on her lips instead of her cheeks. Eren would never want her like that, she’s not his type, small blonde, perky and experienced. No bad Mikasa! She cuts her thoughts off before they can descend into negative territory, she’ll never have Eren romantically but at least he loves her platonically and she’ll take what she can get.

“Leave.” Eren tells Katrina in a tone that brokers no argument, the one he reserves specifically for people who insult her, and it happens often when his one night stands see a girl in Eren’s apartment that’s not them, the jealousy is real. However, what they fail to realize is that she is the one girl he actually gives a shit about, she has a special place reserved in his heart as his best friend, and all the sex in the world has nothing on that.

She continues to listen, waiting for more, but this one surprisingly kicks up little fuss and the next thing Mikasa knows she’s scrambling to move away from the door as Eren opens it, falling swiftly onto her ass in the foyer.

Eren raises his eyebrow at her as he shuts the door, leaning back against it, arms crossed and still delightfully shirtless. Looking up at him, he truly is an attractive figure, arms corded with muscle from working with cars all day, handsome chiselled face with a slit in his right eyebrow and a few tattoos placed randomly along his arms. Mikasa, understands better than anyone why girls flock to Eren like moths to a flame.

“Watcha doing down there love?” He asks, his tone deceptively sweet, she knows he won’t be happy she was listening in, especially since the other girl sort of insulted her. She plays dumb, or attempts to at least.

“Just cleaning up,” she grabs a shoe from the shoe rack next to the door, “Wanted to make sure everything was in order.”

“Uhuh,” he says doubtfully, crouching down to her level where she’s splayed out, legs askew and leaning back on her hands.

“So you were’t eavesdropping on me outside?”

She looks away, she can’t lie to him, she’s terrible at it, he knows all her ticks, and she always inevitably caves and tells him anyway.

“Miki,” His voice is chiding, a hand coming up to grab her chin and turn her in his direction. Her full bottom lip sticks out in a pout as she confesses, “I just wanted to know what you’d tell her, she wasn’t very nice to me.”

He leans in closer, edging his way into her personal space and she’s forced to lean back further on her hands as Eren kneels over her, placing his own hands on her thighs, his face getting closer and closer to hers. Her breathing comes quick as his face finds her neck, “You’re not being a very good girl today Miki. My tea was a little oversteeped and now this,”

She gasps a little, her heart thundering in her chest, theres that phrase, ‘good girl’, every so often Eren slips it into conversation and she doesn’t know why but she absolutely loves it, she adores it when he praises her. She wants to hear him say it all the time, wants to be his everything, wants to be the best.

And sometimes she’ll hear him whisper it to the girls he’s fucking, their bedrooms are right next to each other and the walls are paper thin, how could she not? And those are the times she wants to touch herself the most, when Eren tells the girl he’s with she’s being a good girl in that deep raspy voice of his, in the tone he only uses when he’s at the height of his pleasure, gravelly and filled with desire as he fucks some girl so hard the wall of their shared bedroom shakes.

Her face heats anymore at her train or thought, doing her damndest not to let her eyes follow the V of his abs down to the waist band of his pants.

“I’m sorry, I won’t do it again, I’ll be better,” she responds quickly, she doesn’t want him to be mad at her, not about this, she didn’t mean to eavesdrop, she’ll never do it again as long as he’s not mad at her.

It’s the worst when he’s mad at her, he wont talk to her for a while, won’t touch her and that’s the worst part, no little touches. She’d never realized how totally attached and needy for him she was until they were watching a movie and he wouldn’t let her sit in his lap, wouldn’t lay his head on her chest and hum into her sternum while she fought back shivers because her breasts are so fucking sensitive.

“Eren please, I’m sorry, please don’t be mad at me.”

His face is stern for a moment, dark strong eyebrows scrunched up and lips set into a line, tears prick her eyes at the thought of him giving her the silent treatment for a week again. She can’t do it.

As a tear escapes one eye, tracing a path down her cheekbones, Eren’s large calloused hand comes up to cup her face, moving from her chin, his thumb darting out to catch the tear before he brings his thumb to his mouth, licking the meagre drop from his finger.

His face settles back into a neutral expression before he buries it into her neck, leaning his whole body weight on her, and pushing her to the ground, lying across her front.

“Oh fuck Miki, what am I going to do with you?” He sighs into her neck, before leaving a little bite there that makes her squeak. Then another, and another and she knows this is her punishment but it feels so nice, bites interspersed with little kisses along the column of her throat, they’ll probably leave marks later if she’s lucky.

He pulls back when she makes a little whimpering sound as he hits a particularly sensitive area of her skin, breaking the quiet atmosphere and they both come back to themselves. She’s immediately sad because she loves it when he gets carried away like that, almost feels like she has a chance.

Eren moves away, leaving her cold and bereft on the floor as he stands up.

She stares up at him, quicksilver eyes wide and needy, she needs something, she doesn’t know what, zings shoot through her core and she’s unbearably hot, she needs something. It’s the weird feeling again, the one she only gets when he’s around and being touchy, he must see it in her eyes because a pained looks crosses his face and he almost moves to grab her again but he bites his lip and settles on holding a hand to help her up, “Come on Miki, I’ll make you breakfast love.”

She pouts but takes his hand, following him to the kitchen and sitting herself on the bar stool while he makes her favourite waffles.

It’s always like this, he’s always taking care of her, he can’t help himself and sure sometimes he’s a little mean, well most of the time, and more often than not he’s teasing her, but he takes care of her so well, she trusts him implicitly.

They’re on the cusp of something, she doesn’t know what but she can feel it building, ever since she first moved in, the tension has gotten worse. Eren is like a caged panther waiting, watching, restraining himself, his eyes are always hungry when she walks around in her pyjamas, which consist of only his old shirts and panties, but she can’t quite figure out for what.

He gives her a little wink as he slides her waffles onto a plate and cutting them up for her, before he feeds her delicately, little bites of chocolate chip and syrup. He catches little dribbles of the sickly sweet mixture that stain her lips, bringing his finger to his mouth, just for a taste. He pulls a face at the overly sweet treat, and she laughs which makes Eren smile her favourite smile, the genuine one with all his teeth only she can pull from him.

The next dribble of syrup she loses, Eren feeds it right back to her, holding out his thumb for her to lick but she does him one better and takes the whole digit in her mouth with ease, sucking the syrupy chocolate up happily. She watches him the whole time and his reaction is everything, his eyes glow greener, he leans in just a little closer and there is that intent hungry look again. It’s beginning to be her favourite look on him, something about it is just attractive.

She releases his finger with a pop, smiling at him before she sticks her tongue out, “All clean!”

Eren’s gaze is so intense she wants to look away as he moves his hand to tuck a few stray locks of hair behind her ear. He exhales before he speaks, his voice quiet, like he doesn’t mean to say it at all, “You’re such a good girl aren’t you Miki?”

“What did you say?” She asks because she wants to hear it again and again, but Eren doesn’t oblige.

“Nothing baby, finish your waffles, you haven’t been eating well lately, I don’t want anything left on your plate.”

He takes care of her so so well. How could she ever need anyone else?

But evidently Eren does, to satiate his more carnal needs, the ones she’s clueless about and the one’s she longs for him to use her for. He gets a call halfway through her breakfast and he departs from alternately stealing bites of her waffle and letting her eat by herself. It’s a call from a regular girl, Selena, she’s pretty sure her name is, a beautiful Brazilian exchange student with blue eyes and a perfect olive hue. He kisses Mikasa goodbye, a swift peck to the cheek, before he tells her not to wait up, he’s going to work this afternoon shift and afterwards he’s going ‘out’.

She’s may be naïve but she’s not stupid, she knows what ‘out’ means, he’s going to spend the night at Selena’s and tomorrow he’ll come home with mussed hair and hickeys, he won’t need anyone to make his morning tea, won’t be home to make her breakfast.

She’ll be all alone in the apartment once again and not for the first time, she wonders if maybe she should be doing the same. Just what is she missing out on that’s so good that Eren can’t go two days without it, what is so great about sex that Sasha and Annie will spend hours discussing it over dinner?

She drops her breakfast dish in the sink, scowling as she watches the water run over the remains of her breakfast, filling the sink with bubbles, maybe she should try it too. Maybe sex is what she needs from her life, maybe Eren is onto something.