Hello! I had a silly idea :0 - Yume Nikki Fangame with Adeleine as protagonist.
She has the perfect age range and body type for it!
...I will say, I don't think Adeleine is a good fit for a YNFG protagonist thematically. Those games are often about exploring powerful subconscious TRAUMA through dreams. Can you imagine this Adeleine with the, "iya, iya" ("no, no") reaction in front of a door?
Now, while I've nitpicked once before on the issue the fandom (and I'm not innocent of it) has with stretching and squeezing Adeleine too much to try and cram her into any of a dozen different roles she's not a good match for because she's the only human member of the cast and–at least on the surface–the easiest one to project onto (Really, KIRBY should be the easiest one to project onto, and indeed, Kirby is primed for a YN fangame, as Ondaja already figured out! ^_-) her being seen as Kirby and friends' grounded-in-reality Christopher Robin does mean it at least wouldn't be that unusual/unexpected.
So let's explore the MOST cliche scenario we could use:
I call it, "Dess McGee's Adeleine" XD
Adeleine is a patient undergoing therapy in the real world because Dream Land, Popstar, and everyone there are merely delusions she's having to cope with something awful/frightening in her life. This is her "iya, iya", where she doesn't want to leave her bedroom and continue getting treated so she can face the real world. She wants to go back to sleep so she can keep crutching on her comfort fantasy, though the two "realities" are now battling in her subconscious.
Her dream realms might consist of twisted versions of familiar Kirby landscapes that have intersected with or been awkwardly fused with elements of the real world and various psychoses that might hint (but never explain) why she withdrew from reality in the first place.
The characters might superficially resemble the familiar Kirby cast but not be acting like themselves. Some would shake their heads and walk away or ignore her, some might act aggressively and blame her for trying to "kill them" by getting treatment (these would probably be your chasers), others might look normal but start to decay in a jumpscare-like manner if you interact using certain Effects.
One could even play with the Adeleine/Ado thing here. Perhaps "Adeleine" is part of the delusion. The forever-young child who never has to grow up while "Ado" already resembled someone in her late teens. You could have a series of chasers who look like Ado, or are tall and lanky and represent other aspects of becoming a "grown-up"
Among the Effects are things like Kracko and Ice Dragon as rideables of different speed + inducing various handy weather effects, as well as her trusty paintbrush which could have a variety of functions including a return to hub effect? She should have a Dark Matter-adjacent Effect too, as a former possession victim in 64.
She miiiight also have the crystal gun as her Weapon, though to be true to the YM-style, using it on people should be more violent and semi-permanent than expected. (Oh no, real world consequences are invading my comfort space!) And of course, there is a "Ribbon" Effect that gives her fairy wings if you equip it.
The Good (?) End has Adeleine embrace her reality as the now grown up Ado and leave her room at last. The Bad (?) End has you go to sleep one last time, only to return to a fully restored, fully healed Dream Land with all her friends happy that she's back at last! ^_^
I love getting my silly little dose of validation whenever I explain something as small to my childhood as "yea they taught us to be prepared to be soldiers in spiritual warfare between angels and demons from a young age" and having my therapist or a friend respond like
im so glad that we never get a clear picture of sophie’s background in leverage & i hope we never do. however i also really like making up various, often conflicting backstories for her in my head. perhaps they’re all backstories for an alias of hers, ones she laid to rest back in season two.
I'm gonna be anonymous when I say this because I have seen this done by many people... I strongly dislike the "Error and Nightmare gang are the good guys and trying to make the universe stable while The star sanses are the idiots who will not see reason" .. Like... I .. really? I'm not sure if the reason why I don't like it is because I have seen it so many times or what but it annoys me dearly. The members of the star sanses are reasonable and they are just often made as one sided ignorant people-
I mean okay Lets go on the different pov, on the bad sanse side: You see them risk their lives every day getting themselves hurt over and over again all to defend different worlds for the sake of bringing what they believe to be peace and you label them as the fools who just want all the glory- really??? people who get hurt over and over again just do it for that stupid reasons??? I mean come on!
Seeing as generally it is shown that the bad sanses want peace as well why not be trying to reach an agreement??? you fight over and over again and you couldn't even be bothered to try and reach their heads to finally listen to what you are saying like what "in a way" dream has done with nightmare countless times but they cant do the same? Just have them fight knowing that the other side are in the wrong and you choose to do nothing but break them?? Like is this your pride or something?? Why are they labelled as good guys yet they allow the other side to fight to their deaths with a good motive in mind but they only lack the full picture?? How am i suppose to "root for you" if this is what you do????? We get inside information of how peaceful they are and how they care for each other deeply, but if you care so much for each other why would you allow the other side to keep fighting your loved ones when they are missing the big picture, you know the big picture yet you say... NOTHING. NADA. ZILCH!! you cannot tell me that they don't listen to you when you barely speak up about the true issue or find a way to show them- you maybe say it once or twice in the whole story and then any other time you go straight to fighting or just avoid them.. COWARDS!! ALL OF THEM!!
And in these stories the star sanses always state their reasons for their interference yet you cannot tell them why you are doing this?? All that comes out your mouth are insults and sneers, who would want to believe you when that is all the comes out of your MOUTHS...
Excuse me... Just pissed sorry for the long rant.. Oh my gosh AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON DREAM AND NIGHTMARE, DUDE YOU GOT THE BALLS TO BLAME YOUR KID BROTHER FOR BEING A KID AND NOT RECOGNISING YOUR TRAUMA EVEN NOW AS YOU ARE MUCH MORE MATURE AND HAVE THE ABILITY TO REALIZE WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU BOTH AS CHILDREN????? Is he the one holding onto the past or is it you??? Night is always depicted as the dadmare, boss, the caring lover, the brother yet he doesn't even have the decency to face the fact he abandoned his brother in stone for 500 years or so, when he comes out you automatically hate him for something he had no idea or control of and choose to ignore his pleads, when your brother wants to reach you, you break him over and over again not wanting him in your life ever again when as i said before he was your "KID BROTHER" and you want to tell me your the good one for just wanting to cut him off with no answers or anything? You gotta be pulling my leg bro... and it would be a different story if the dreamtale background is different but no! it isnt! nothing is said to make it seem dream was an abuser of sorts, they were both hurt and yet you blame dream for all of it you have a whole ass support system yet that is your mindset??? I cant.... I really cant
Uh sorry again for this long ass rant though =w=
anon our souls are holding hands resonating as one
my two cents on this (that isn't something i said. a million times before already) is that it's usually because people refuse to see the star sanses in the same light they do the bad sanses
the people who actively dislike the star sanses and what they do usually do so because they can't relate to them, from what i've noticed
the bad sanses are easier to root for because of the fact that they are made of struggle and the dirty, gritty parts of morality and life so to say
it's easier to think of good things in the middle of so much bad, because it's in our nature as people to look for hope or root for the good, no matter how little it is
having the ability to look for goodness and love in so much evil is a form of love in of itself
everybody struggles and life sucks and sometimes the world is evil and sometimes we do bad things, but that's the thing, the fact that we as people find something good in the middle of it all (like finding familial love bloom in the bad sanses, as an example) is very inspiring.
at least to me!!! that's how i see it!!!! that's how i like to think people see it as well because that's how i see and enjoy them together
so i can totally see why people find more relatability and love for the bad sanses. i really do get it and i agree!! like a lot!!!!! i love them too
but that exact reason is also why it really sucks that people just don't see the star sanses in the same light?
i wanna reemphasize my point in relatability:
it's difficult for most people to relate to the star sanses because inherently they are the heroes, the protagonists, the main characters, because nobody are any of those things
i feel like people often put them on a pedestal because of their central tropes and characteristics. they have it all already, they don't need more praise, right?
i think the biggest problem people have with the star sanses, like your whole ramble very clearly shows, is that they don't humanize them
i feel like a lot of people assume that just because they are good and choose to be good and are praised for being good, they are unreachable
people don't think they struggle. that it sucks being that.
it's often why i like writing the star sanses with so much struggle and so much mental illness lol, because being good is fucking HARD and they're as imperfect as everybody else.
dream is anxious, ink is brash, blue is a workaholic, stuff like that
there's a lot to say but it's just....the bad sanses and the star sanses are two sides of the same coin.
the bad sanses is finding good in the middle of, basically, evil and misdeed
the star sanses is finding struggle in the middle of trying to do good
people often portray both of them black and white morals and it's why it gets frustrating and flat and badly written.
idk, just like how i find inspiration in the bad sanses of finding hope and love in the middle of darkness, i really admire the implications of the star sanses when you actually decide to humanize them.
because if you make the star sanses struggle throughout their praise, glory, and righteousness, it's...really admirable that they still choose to do good.
like you said, the star sanses risk their lives often and fight, offering treaties and agreements, just to make things right
that's so??? admirable????? like for the amount of times the bad sanses fucking fight them, i genuinely would've just given up completely, but they just....don't??? and that's so admirable and sweet?
it makes them so deserving of their titles as guardians.
idk!!! this is a massive ramble too, i don't even know where i was going with it but like, yeah, i think i wanted to talk mostly about why people preferred the bad sanses over the star sanses and how it makes me sad
i get you anon. with my whole body and my whole soul. i understand what you mean and i see you
It’s Christmas morning and your parents actually got you that 7ft tall robot jester you’ve been raving about and now you have to awkwardly unwrap them in front of the rest of your family.
(this is tagged for it as well, but putting it here: the below involves some non-graphic mention/discussion of suicide in relation to episode 3x78)
I think it's important to keep in mind, regarding the most recent episode, that while Ashton's behavior was extremely dangerous and reckless, it was not suicidal in intent. Ashton thought it would work. They thought that they would fix things, and they ignored all the smart people warning them against it because it would imply a lot of negative things about their parents. That doesn't mean it wasn't an action taken out of a certain lack of self-regard (Ashton's realization of this is what drives much of his conversations in the first half of the episode); but it's much more akin to an accidental overdose, or a drunk/reckless driving, or other dangerous choices. It feels very true to the idea of punk that Taliesin is going for, in which dying young is always very much a possibility, even perhaps an expectation; but not necessarily a goal. Ashton did not expect taking the shard to result in their death, and is incredibly shaken specifically because it did.
With that in mind I think the party's reactions seem very real and very understandable. The fact is, when someone does something very risky and nearly dies (or even is briefly clinically dead, using real-world terms) but ultimately survives it's extremely normal for one of the emotional responses to be anger that they put themselves in such danger. It is not, perhaps, rational, but most emotions aren't. It hurts a lot when someone one is close to does something that harmful to themselves. I don't judge the other members of Bells Hells for expressing those feelings. Frankly, them not expressing similar feelings in the past might very well be why Ashton made the decisions he did: the party lacking trust and walking on eggshells around each other is why he didn't confide in them, and why they fell apart so completely here.
I think it's relevant that Chetney tells Fearne, after stating he likes Ashton, that either she or Ashton can talk to him if they "want out", and he pretty heavily implies that this indicates not just leaving Bells Hells, but suicide, and that he has considered the latter in the past. It's clear that initially Chetney considers that a possible reason for Ashton's actions. He then gives Ashton the "You should leave" speech only after everyone present has been talking at dinner, after Ashton has indicated that he will help find Laudna. It only comes out after Ashton's emotional state is made more clear to him: it's pretty bad, but not actively at risk of self-harm (and indeed, desperately trying to avoid it and to change).
Finally, it's worth considering how important anger is to Ashton. Obviously I don't think having Imogen, FCG, and Chetney yell at them feels good. I also think it's going to feel better than apathy, and more honest than any other option. I don't think a forced gentleness would be better; in fact it might be worse, with them taking a break because clearly Ashton is having a hard time and needs to recover (shades of how Marisha mentioned Laudna feeling like a burden following her resurrection), rather than "we are clearly all in disarray and all have been not dealing with a lot of emotions, and this could have been any of us, and we should all regroup." I mentioned before that ultimately what's important is, angry as they are, Bells Hells undeniably stayed, and FCG and Imogen at least made it clear early on that they would, even if they were angry. Ashton was abandoned in the past by people who weren't even angry, is the thing. I don't think they cared enough to be.
i'm saying it. i don't think joly would work in a hospital. i think his medical career would be informed by his politics + radicalisation and his + his friends regular drug use, he would be outraged at how the medical industry handles drug users, also at the medical industrial complex in general, so he would find a reputable community led harm reduction organisation to work for 🫶🏻
Would it be too broad a question to prompt for thoughts on a Yue & Azula dynamic? Idk if it’s rly that fun to ruminate on hypotheticals when Yue is the moon post s1, but I mean, we have contemplated the potential dynamics of Yue with other characters beyond s1 so I don’t see why not. Tbh I just thought it was interesting bc Yue has completely internalized her role within patriarchy as a symbol of the motherland etc etc. & Azula I think everyone esp w/in fandom tends to misconstrue as like. Autonomous & selfish & ontologically evil when her whole Deal is subservience to a “divine” patriarch & being molded into a perfect weapon. Or am I only thinking they would have an interesting dynamic bc as you’ve rightly said before, sokka & Azula as foils are already rly compelling & Yue is the female sokka?
lmfao yeah you basically said it all. yue and azula are both mirrors to sokka and also mirrors to each other. they each have “duties to their father and to their people” that they embody above all else, sublimating their personhood to perform obedience to their respective patriarchs. yue performs this role through denying her own agency and sacrificing herself, azula performs this role through dehumanizing herself and molding herself into a weapon, and sokka does all of the above. but in a more literal sense, yue and azula are both princesses (obviously sokka is also the son of the chief, but it’s a different situation because he’s also not a Girl) and so this is already a huge commonality between them, considering they’re the only two real princesses in the entire show (although you could argue that toph and mai functionally had similar upbringings). I think a lot of people envision azula and yue working together in an AU wherein the war never happened and so there was international cooperation that allowed for them to meet. that, or an AU wherein yue survives the siege and eventually meets azula. neither of these hypotheticals are particularly interesting to me, but I could see them getting along, because yue likes nerdy dorks who make bad jokes and kill people, and azula likes beautiful girls with shiny hair who are nice to her (to be honest I don’t even think they have to be beautiful, I think they just have to be nice to her, and being absolutely gorgeous is just a bonus). but it’s also kind of a pointless ship to me because there’s no real scenario wherein they’d interact, and sokka already functions as a proxy between both of them in the first place. and is he not dykey enough to satisfy your desires??? for shame.
How would he hypothetically react to being stabbed. (Accidentally) Like not a deadly stab wound but one big enough for it to be considered concerning.
How would the rest of the cast react?
Ok so what I'm asking is how committed is p! Noah to the bit? How for would he go in such a serious situation. Maybe he didn't care at all and walked around bleeding? Maybe he was only thinking of ways to torment the others using this to his advantage. Idk.
Also love this au sm!!
"Hypothetically", just say you want to stab him. This is a safe space, I'm not judging. ...Okay I'm judging a little bit.
I actually have a few thoughts about reactions to stabbings, as someone who's been involved in more than my fair share of them, and generally I think a lot of people don't tend to understand just how much it fucking hurts to be stabbed, even when it's non-fatal. It is a very painful experience, even with the added anaesthetic of adrenaline, and seeing just how often media portrays people walking off stab wounds or regarding them as little more than scratches is just. Infuriating.
Now, I personally headcanon Noah as someone with a fairly high pain tolerance. This is backed by a lot of the bone-crushing and otherwise painful experiences he suffers through in the show and is generally able to shrug off without complaint (and really, Noah would realistically have so much chronic pain after World Tour in particular, given how much he's crushed, tossed and thrown about in that season alone). But that doesn't mean I think he can just brute-force his way through acting unconcerned by a literal stab wound.
Even p!Noah wouldn't have that unwavering of a constitution, and he's crazy. Though I do think he'd make a good effort of maintaining his persona as the unflappable unstable wildcard, he'd be quick to abscond from the situation at hand and treat the wound. Again, that shit hurts, and it's really hard to keep up any pretences under the pain of a stab wound, so getting himself out of the situation as fast as possible would be his top priority- the less time he spends around the others in his vulnerable state, the slimmer the chances are of them seeing behind his mask of mania to the scared person hidden behind it.
Because his detachment from reality is the vast majority of his defence mechanism game plan; if Noah allows himself to be seen as anything but the psychopath he's portrayed himself as- either by the audience or the now aware cast- he's lost practically everything he's spent seasons building up on camera. Letting himself be seen as vulnerable or even affected by something as "inconsequential" as a stab would is a no-go, so he'd stutter out a few witty zingers and bounce.
(Which is an incredibly unhealthy mindset to have, but p!Noah isn't exactly mentally sound even without his exaggerated persona. His commitment to The Bit is strong enough for him to momentarily disregard his physical wellbeing, but not enough to grant him the ability to completely ignore it.)
It'd play out something like this:
---
Noah's eyes momentarily widened in shock as he felt the cold steel of Duncan's knife embed itself into the meat of his upper thigh. The pain was searingly sharp, molten agony burning like lava in his veins, and the bookworm found himself reflexively stumbling backwards from the punk.
"Did you just stab me?" He asked incredulously, sparing a glance down towards the weapon sticking out of his now ruined cargo shorts. The sight was almost comedic; Noah's oversized shorts rested against the hilt of the knife like cushions, completely blanketing the wound beneath them. He was almost amused enough to laugh, but the constant screaming of his nerves had his laughter congealing against the back of his throat with the rest of his saliva, leaving his mouth uncomfortably dry.
Duncan, in turn, seemed just as shocked by the turn of events. The delinquent's terrified blue eyes darted from Noah's face to the knife jutting out of his thigh. Which prompted the cynic to contort his grimace into a toothy grin, as any sign of weakness here would completely ruin his carefully cultivated image, though the edges of his smile were soured by the constant throbbing pain in his leg.
Truly, it was Noah's own fault. He shouldn't've provoked the stab-happy jailbird, but messing with Duncan was just too fun an opportunity to pass up.
"Oh fuck! Oh shit, dude, I'm so sorry!"
And he really was. Noah could tell by the shaky panic in his voice, the bulging of his ice-blue eyes, and the way Duncan seemed to curl self-consciously into himself. Not that the pessimist thought he had any right to act to timid- he was the one with the knife in his leg.
Again, Noah wanted nothing more than to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. Here he was, stood before the resident metal-faced punk, brandishing the other's knife deep in the flesh of his thigh like some sort of twisted fashion statement. Every minor twitch and spasm of his muscles had white-hot agony lick at the back of his mind like flames, matching the welling heat of pained tears he desperately choked down; Noah refused to cry in front of Duncan, refused to let the other know just how much pain he was in.
He took a few tentative steps backwards, edging towards the exit of the Economy Cabin and towards the relative safety of the Confessional. Each step was a test in his composure, as every time he put even the slightest bit of weight onto his pierced leg Noah felt liquid hot torture bubble through his veins.
"Wow. I know you offered to give me a piercing, but don't you think this is a bit much?" Noah snarked, playing off the unsteady tightness of his voice as mirth with a humourless giggle, and disguising the wince he couldn't quite subdue as a cocky tilting of his head.
Noah placed a steadying hand on the doorframe of the exit, never once turning his back to his assaulter or letting his feral grin falter, as his tear-fogged eyes scanned across the cabin. He'd made it to the exit, but really needed a moment to catch his breath. It was so hard to breath around the sharp, burning pain.
The cynic felt, more than saw, the concerned looks the other occupants of Economy were shooting him. In fact, both Owen and Alejandro had jumped from their seats to, assumedly, assist him. That wouldn't do- Noah staunchly refused to show any semblance of helplessness in front of Alejandro. The latino's hero complex and overblown ego would never let Noah hear the end of it, and making himself even the slightest bit sympathetic in front of their audience would offset the persona he'd worked so hard to maintain.
Damn his team and their inconstant bouts of humanity; concern was the last thing Noah wanted! The whole situation was jeopardising his image! He'd have to do something drastic to stop his well intentioned teammates from following him- something crazy.
"I'm keeping this, by the way."
The bookworm yanked the knife from it's nested perch in is thigh, scattering scarlet droplets of blood in its wake, and brandished his newfound weapon with performative flourish. It hurt like a bitch, and Noah had to force down a shudder at the feeling of his own rapidly welling blood as it began to trickle down his leg like molasses in rivulets of crimson. No doubt his shorts would be ruined, not that they weren't already.
A resounding cry of disbelief rattled through the cabin, though Noah payed it no mind.
It... probably wasn't the best idea, ripping the knife out of his stab wound. But Noah was nothing if not committed to his act, and it wasn't as if he could just re-plug the bleeding with the knife.
Unless? ...No, no that was stupid. The persistent throbbing pain of his sluggishly bleeding wound was probably just messing with his head.
It was, however, satisfying to watch the well-intentioned concern on the other's faces drain into white-faced revulsion and terror, as Noah playfully began to spin the blood soaked weapon between his fingers. Both Owen and Alejandro came to a halt a few meters away from him, the Spaniard in particular seemed to recoil at the stray droplets of the cynic's blood as his face took on a peculiar green tinge.
And Duncan stood shell-shocked in his original position, apparently still stunned by disbelief by his own actions. Not that Noah cared, but it was a little ironic to him; the big bad delinquent couldn't handle the ramifications of his own violence. How sad, Noah's heart was just bleeding for him- or was it his leg? It was hard to tell, the rapid loss of blood made his deductive skills a little wonky.
"Thanks for the gift, Duncey. Toodles!~"
With that, Noah skittered his way out of the cabin, leaving a trail of scarlet behind him.
"Dude, what the fuck."
---
And then p!Noah hobbles his way to the Confessional to treat his stab wound and stop the bleeding. And probably has a little cry over it because ouch, being stabbed hurts. (Obviously he'd muffle the sounds of his sobs and agonised hissed breaths as he deals with the wound- he wouldn't want anyone overhearing his moment of weakness.)
Then, of course, he remembers that the Confessional is decked out with a camera and quickly re-masks into his usual persona and waxes poetic about how pretty he looks covered in his own blood, and how Duncan was so generous in gifting him his prized knife, and how Noah would love to repay the favour. Or something along those lines.
Duncan in this scenario would have the added bonus of not only dealing with the guilt of stabbing someone, but also the paranoia of Noah's rebuttal. Of which Noah would relish in, because of course he would.
As for the others, Noah would make a conscious and continuous effort to keep them as unconcerned with his wellbeing as possible, since his whole goal is to make himself seem as inhuman and unstable as possible. Letting the others care about him would humanise Noah in the eyes of the cast and the audience at large, which is a big no-no for his game plan.
That doesn't mean he wouldn't let Owen fuss over him in private; Owen's one of the very few people around who knows that a lot of Noah's instability is an exaggeration, so Noah isn't as hesitant to lower his walls.
I finished my neutral run of Undertale Yellow yesterday, and I'm still thinking about how cool it was. The graphics in the final boss fight were so impressive and the different art styles were executed incredibly. The reveal that Clover would stay with Toriel if Flowey didn't intervene I think adds so much to the hints of their past we get throughout the game. I think it's not unreasonable to interpret this as Clover desiring a better home life so much that they would be willing to sacrifice their mission for it. It's a neat character detail.
I think the absolute coolest part of it all, though, is the pre-fight because it shows how well the dev team understood what made Undertale special. Undertale played on the expectations of your average gamer, and Undertale Yellow in turn plays on your expectations as someone who liked Undertale enough to seek out a fan game for it. I think it's safe to say that most people probably got the pacifist ending on their first run since they weren't forced into a neutral run like in Undertale. The pacifist ending basically shows the best and presumably canon ending for Undertale Yellow. After all, the only person who has to die is Clover. This naturally raises the question of what happens on a neutral run. It must be meaningfully different, or else it wouldn't be optional. Doing a low LV neutral run initially presents what would probably have been a fairly decent outcome for most characters if Flowey didn't step in. (Also it raises a really fascinating ethical question on whether you would be willing to sacrifice one random scrub monster or robot for a decent ending where Clover gets to live.) Without Flowey's intervention at the end, Dalv would stop isolating and would connect with the inhabitants of the Ruins, Ceroba would find solace in being with the Feisty Five, Starlo would return to his old self and makes good with his posse, Axis would get to remain active and without his anger issues, and Martlet and Clover would get to have a pleasant existence together. Now, all of this is, admittedly, pretty hypothetical, but it's not unreasonable to assume that this is how things would go. For those that wanted an ending where Clover lives, the neutral route seems to provide that as a possibility. And then it rips that possibility away. It plays with and takes advantage of that desire I think most people have to see all of the main cast if not happy, then at least content. Even though we got the "best" ending and know Clover has to die, we still want that wish fulfillment of seeing everyone together after the credits roll, and I think the devs were fully aware of that. It is genuinely so impressive that the devs managed to make such the neutral run into something so fascinating when it could have easily been a boring, stepping stone on the way to the other endings
Before Project Mayhem, before fight club, before Marla, before Tyler — there is still one sad sack of shit.
.
.
The hard part about work trips isn't making the plane or seeing another family of five burnt into their leather seats. It's missing support groups.
See, if you're lucky, the company will send you out to a major city. Cities are great. A little advanced work to find a slightly below average church or library, you're set each night you're there.
It's a bit of novelty, getting to be a new face all at once. People assume you've just been diagnosed. It's never the failed treatments, the degradation of their life and everyone in it, the continuous experience of knowingly dying — none of those things are the worst thing that happens to you.
It's finding out they will.
So people cry. They crowd around, I sob like I've been told I've got stage four colon cancer and three weeks to live. We all cry. I sleep soundly on the plane back or in the nice, four star hotel my company provides me.
Flying out to a small town, though. I'll be awake enough to be hallucinating by the time I get back for Remaining Men Together. The only mercy is that the next time I show for all the groups I missed, I can see who thought I died. I get to be resurrected.
The other part about small towns, you have to take a second, shitter plane to a local airfield, or you have to take a rental car. One of the most popular rental cars available right now, it'll light itself on fire if you use the cruise control at the wrong time. I know this because I sat next to another guy with my job, who worked for a different company, and he said I'll show you mine if you show me yours. So I told him about the faulty airbags, and he told me about the overheating switch.
I prefer to avoid driving.
All the rental place at the airport has left for me, it's one of those flaming cars. I use cruise control. If I don't, one of my narcoleptic spells will send me into the Jersey barrier.
When you drive into these small towns, you have to try to pay attention, or you'll end up a county over talking about the wrong wreck. They're otherwise interchangeable, but the miles on your rental car won't line up and those are the type of records that might get pulled out when the company is finally sued for the big one ten years down the line.
As a result, I see the same decor on the way in every time. Meth lab. Abandoned homes. Garbage fire. Classic Americana. There is no four star hotel here; I sleep the same.
The only reason I've been brought out here is because the poor shithead who drove his truck into the ditch drunk was driving my company's flagship vehicle. It loses power steering if the car jostles the right way going above 55 miles per hour. I've been told to keep track of potential incidents and make sure the company can firmly claim it's not at fault.
We've had this problem for decades, and we will for many more. Sometimes, everything is falling apart.
The job is simple, and I only get tempted by the town's blatant opioid addiction for a day and night. Painkillers would probably make me sleep. The thing about being a recall campaign organizer, though, is like recognizes like. It's not only other Compliance and Liability guys who tell you company secrets while sharing the aisle in business class.
When I'm finally back in my own town, after my own support groups, after crying my eyes out into Bob's meaty middle — I pick up my mail. There's the newest IKEA magazine. Half of it looks like shit. The type of thing you'd only see in some curated art deco, modernist, post-modern traditionalist bohemian minimalist apartment.
I have to have it.
I go to sleep, hard, like God himself tucked me in. I sleep with my wallet net four hundred heavier, because even an IKEA spree tends not to outweigh a work trip. I sleep, with my called in IKEA goods only two short weeks away, my job well done, and I know, my life is complete.
This is my way of saying my fanbot would adore her.
Janka would make an entire love song compilation for them. because that's what valentines robots like, right?
i think she would really enjoy spending time with Hearty Harmoni and Skips (creator-didn't-make-them-legs gang), but there is always something missing when she can't communicate her exact feelings, often just staying silent to not waste her energy. so when the night comes, she thinks about what would it be like - to go on a walk and have a nice chat, using your own words :]
The weirdest shit about the tumblr worm fandom is how they have very strong convictions and very in depth analysis of characters that manages to completely rewrite everything about the characters. It's not like the reddit/spacebattles fanon where people took a quality mentioned in the text and ran too far with it (like extrapolating Sophia's words to Emma to turn Sophia into some bizarre philosopher) or applied some trope they like (uwu lesbians) onto characters it doesn't fit (all canon lesbians). On tumblr you'll find these takes that insist that Taylor is actually hugely into baseball and it's a core part of her character and it's her struggle with being constantly placed on second base that is the key to her character. Things that have nothing to do with the text, the character, their actions, other perceptions of it. And other people will not only agree, they will discuss how sports are key to Worm and the entire thing is about Wildbow's frustration with the Chicago Bears. I have no idea how to explain any of it but I am so fascinated by these analyses.