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evermoresqueiswriting · 2 months

Text

riptide

“I was scared of dentists and the dark I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations Oh, all my friends are turning green You're the magician's assistant in their dream”

summary: going on the camp's field trip to olympus because clarisse asked you to, meeting your father and clarisse's father and also, there are new updates from camp - luke gone, and percy's arrival

pairing: clarisse la rue x f!reader

word count: 6.7k (14 year old me would never believe me if i said i casually wrote a 6k chapter)

tags: mostly fluff, tiny splash and angst

series masterlist 3/?

The date ended really late – you fell asleep on the beach, and Clarisse didn’t have the heart to wake you up. She didn’t dare, you looked too peaceful to disturb. You loved taking naps and whenever you were around Clarisse, you felt safe enough to do so. By the time you woke up, it was already dark, and Clarisse had put your blouse back on you because it started to get chilly. When you realised what time it was, you hurried Clarisse and grabbed all your bags before leaving the beach.

The ride back home was quite long, and once you got into camp, it was really quiet. You and Clarisse tried to be quiet, and walked slowly towards your cabins, but then you heard footsteps. Both of you whipped around. Chiron, hands on his hip and Mr D, standing next to him.

“Hi,” you waved.

Clarisse swiftly grabbed your hand to put it down.

“You missed the curfew,” Mr D said.

“What– What curfew? There was one?” you hesitated, looking at Clarisse.

“Yes,” Mr D continued, “it was written, black on white, that you should be home before 9pm. And it’s, would you look at that,” he showed you his watch-less wrist, “it’s past 11!”

“We– I didn’t know,” you explained, “I- I mean– I can’t read and neither can she.”

Chiron shook his head, and Clarisse stepped in front of you, shielding you from their disappointed faces.

“We’re sorry, we didn’t see the time.”

Your hand was grabbing tightly onto Clarisse’s arm.

“Go back to your cabins and rest,” Chiron said.

“Yeah, cause you’ll need it for the cleaning duties you’ll get for the whole week or month, I still haven’t decided yet haha,” Mr D finished and walked away.

You were once again alone. You sighed.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, not daring to look at her.

“What for?”

“I should’ve read the whole letter, I should've known and now because of me you’ll have cleaning duties for maybe a whole month!”

“I don’t mind, I had a great time today,” you raised your head up at this, “I’ll do another month again if it means we get to do that again.”

“Really?” you smiled.

“Really, now go to sleep.”

It ended up being a whole month of cleaning duties, but neither of you cared because you got to be together.

Your summer was split between three people, Clarisse, Will and Lee.

Fighting and combat with Clarisse. Clarisse was ruthless, not letting you rest for a bit, always pushing you to your limits. She had one thing in mind and that was for you to be the best version of yourself. You were progressing fast which she was extremely proud of. Just like Luke said, you were a natural fighter, and everyone noticed that during Capture the Flag. You went from hiding behind Clarisse the whole time from leading the fight.

Archery lessons from Lee. Lee was also very insistent as a teacher. Never letting you rest.

“Hitting a still target is easy, a child could do it,” Lee told you in his first lesson. “But no monster is going to stay still for you to hit it at your pace. So, we’ll practise on moving targets, fast and unpredictable ones.”

And he was right, it was much more difficult. There was no time for you to prepare, and see where the wind went. But after some practice, it was easier. He was a good teacher, after all. You were tired and sore at the end of every day, which seemed a bit excessive for a fun, safe, summer camp for half bloods. They looked like they were preparing you for war at this pace. And when you had some free time, you spent it with Cornelia painting and playing old board games they had in the cabins. It was a great way to relax.

Alongside sharpening your skills, you also spent an absurd amount of time at the infirmary with Will. Michael was the one teaching you everything, with a tiny Will following you there too. He was absorbing information at an incredible pace.

“Isn’t he a bit young to be learning all of this?” you asked Michael.

“Yeah, but he’s good at it, so who cares? Surely not Mr D.”

Will was a really nice kid, and obviously a natural healer. With the two of you at the infirmary, Michael was able to leave for longer periods of time. Will and you often held karaoke afternoons while cleaning the infirmary. And this time, it was your turn to choose the song. So, You and Will were dueting ‘august’ by Taylor Swift when someone came in.

“But do you remember? Remember when I pulled up and said, "Get in the car" And then canceled my plans just in case you'd call? Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all "Meet me behind the mall" Remember–” you sang with Will.

“You’re having fun here,” Clarisse leaned on the doorframe.

You screamed, and turned around.

“Clarisse! Hi,” Will waved.

She gave you a questioning look. They had never met.

“This is Will Solace, my brother,” you smiled.

“Yeah, y/n talks about you all the time!” Will smile proudly, before you shoved him aside.

“Betrayal, I said all of these things in confidence, but whatever,” you dragged him outside. “Go grab some more supplies, we’re missing ambrosia.”

“But it’s ful–.”

You slammed the door.

“He doesn’t know what he’s saying,” you laughed, turning back to Clarisse.

“Sure,” she smirked.

“What are you doing here anyway?”

“I forgot to give you something.”

“A gift?” you beamed.

She took out a small tissue bag from her pocket and handed it to you. You opened it, and let the object slip into your palm. A ring.

“Are you proposing?” you joked.

She rolled her eyes, and smiled.

“I watched you pick this size when choosing yours, so you shouldn’t lose this one.”

“Thank you, it’s so pretty I love it!” you put it on your left index.

Clarisse had the one you gave her on her necklace.

“Great, don’t lose it.”

“I won’t!”

And just like that – in the blink of an eye – summer was over, and it was time for you to leave camp and go back home. You knew it was time to leave when Mr D started yelling that those who weren’t staying for the year to leave immediately because he had enough of seeing you bunch. When you walked away from your cabin, you noticed Clarisse was already waiting for you at the entrance of camp.

“I guess this is goodbye,” she smiled.

“Until October, for the field trip,” you corrected her. “I talked to Mr D and he said it was ok for me to come. So really it’s only two months away! And I’ll send letters, I’m sure Hermes Express have those next day delivery types of… offers?”

“Sure.”

You fiddled with your fingers.

“I’m going to miss you,” you admitted. “And I’ll miss Capture the Flag and being on your team, and I’ll miss sparing with you, and I’ll miss… seeing you everyday.”

Her eyes softened.

“Only two months, like you said.”

You nodded. Then, hesitantly, you opened your arms.

“What?” Clarisse frowned.

“We should hug goodbye.”

She had her arms crossed, but then she uncrossed them and you went to wrap your arms around her torso. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around your shoulders. When her arms loosened, you let go.

“I’ll see you soon Clarisse,” you squeezed her arm, before walking away.

“See you soon sunshine,” Clarisse watched you walk away, “I’ll miss you too,” but you were already too far away to hear it.

Once you were back home, the first thing you did was to go find your mom’s old walkerman. You had to go search the old boxes your mom had put away in the attic – it was difficult but worth it.

“Why do you need this?” your mother asked once you came out of the attic with her walkerman.

“It’s for— my friend?”

“Clarisse?”

“Yes. Clarisse.”

When you told your mother about your summer at camp, it had included a lot of Clarisse related stories.

“And I told her I’d send letters so we could keep in touch, but now I realise I can’t write for the life of me, and even if I did write something, she’s spent too much time trying to decipher what I wrote, and it's just not– good. So I thought I’d send her this,” you waved the walkerman, “and I’d buy empty cassettes to record things, and send pictures along with it.”

“Oh, that’s a very nice thing to do,” she nodded.

“Oh! I forgot to tell you– to ask you really. Hm, there is this field trip at camp… in october. It’d be during the halloween vacations, so I won’t miss school. Can I go, please?”

“Sure, I don’t see why not.”

Well that was easy.

So every week, you’d record what you did and update Clarisse about your life, you’d take pictures and buy her favourite snacks — you tried out a lot during your date — and ship it to camp half-blood. Clarisse would also send you pictures. The dinner, pictures of Will and behind one of his pictures he’d written ‘i miss u <3’ on the back, people training, their win at Capture the Flag, and you’d keep everything in a box dedicated to Clarisse.

Two months. Two months at camp went by fast, too fast even. But two months at school, minus your friends and the fun at camp, it was slow. You woke up every day at 6:45am, got ready and left for school, came back around 5:50pm and did your homework, ate, washed-up, and then scrolled on twitter, fighting with random accounts, and then went to sleep. Your routine was boring to no end, but you tried so you could have things to tell Clarisse. But life outside of camp was boring and your mother could see that.

“You know, if you wanted to stay at camp for the whole year, I wouldn’t stop you.”

Oh.

“But, what about you then? I don’t want you to live alone in this big ass mansion.”

“I’m an adult, I’ll be fine,” she reassured you.

“I won’t, knowing you’ll be alone.”

Your mom wasn’t on good terms with her parents after they learned that she’d be raising a kid alone, without marriage or even a boyfriend. After you were born, they did visit and spent time with you, but never with your mom, their daughter. So she couldn’t even call them to come live with her. You weren’t going to abandon her when she only has you.

“I–,” she put her chopsticks down, “I met someone at work.”

“What! What does that mean?”

“It means, I’ve been seeing someone.”

“Oh my– you’re trying to get rid of me to have—” you stared at her, mouth wide open from shock, “sex,” you mouthed.

“Oh grow up y/n, I’m an adult, where do you think you came from.”

“Uh– rude.”

“I’m just saying, this is your last year in high school, if next year you want to stay at camp, you can.”

“And you’d be fine with it?”

She nodded.

“What if I want to stay here, at home?”

“Then you’d stay here, as long as you want, this is your home as well.”

“I’ll– I’ll think about it.”

And then it was finally time to leave for camp again. Your mom drove you to the airport and you left with your suitcase in hand. It was the longest flight ever, and the cab seemed to be driving even slower than a snail. An old lady on foot was faster than this, but then you were finally there.

“Are you sure this is where you want to get out?” the cab driver asked, seeing the empty road.

“Yes,” you gave him the money, “keep the change, bye.”

When you arrived at camp, Chiron was waiting for you at the entrance already, and you greeted him happily.

“How was the trip to camp?”

“Great. Long and tiring for sure, but I’m so excited too.”

“Good, we’re going to leave soon, you can go put your things in your cabin first.”

The first one to spot you was Cornelia, and she came running to hug you. And then Will came in very quickly to give you a hug as well.

“I missed you guys so much,” you smiled.

“I wish you were staying here all the time,” Will said. “I’m all alone at the infirmary.”

“You’re leaving him alone?” you gasped at Michael.

“He kicked me out! Said you had a whole system going on there and I wasn’t following it correctly.”

“He also wasn’t doing karaoke afternoons with me,” Will told you.

“How dare he. That’s ‘cause he has no taste.”

“I can hear you,” Michael stood beside you.

“Do you mind? I’m having a private conversation.”

“Yeah do you mind, we’re having a private conversation,” Will repeated.

It felt great to be at camp – it felt safe, familiar and comforting. You put your suitcase beside your bed, and grabbed some chocolate bars from your backpack and put them in your pocket. Will, who stayed by your side, pleaded with his eyes to get one too and you couldn’t resist.

“I’ll give you more later,” you promised him.

You left your cabin with your siblings as it was time to leave camp. Everyone was on their way to the entrance. You looked around, hoping to catch Clarisse, and there she was, way ahead of you. You turned around, facing your siblings and after a brief “see you up there”, you ran off.

Clarisse was talking to her brother, and she looked around for you. She was expecting you to be beside Chiron at the entrance, but you weren't. Maybe you were late? When suddenly, she felt someone jump on her back, and her immediate response was to grab their arm and throw them on the ground.

“Ugh! Motherfucker,” you moaned, laying on the ground, with Clarisse holding down on your arm on the ground.

“What the hell!” Clarisse immediately let go and helped you get up. “Why would you do that?”

“I wanted to surprise you,” you rubbed your arm. “Why would you do that?”

“You jumped on me! Are you ok?” Clarisse worried.

You stared at her, dumbstruck.

“No! I’m not!”

Just when she was about to talk, Chiron called for all the campers to gather around, and you left without giving her the chance to speak. Your whole back was aching, and you tried not to think about it too much, but that was impossible because of Clarisse’s strength. Clarisse tried to grab your arm to slow you down, but you shook her off. Then, Michael and Lee just had to get involved.

“Butt off Clarisse,” Michael squeezed himself between you two. “Didn’t you do enough by crushing y/n to dust? So much for being friends,” he snickered.

“Fuck off Michael unless you want to wake up in the morning missing your front row teeth,” Clarisse spat.

Michael did back away a little, bumping into you.

“How can you be friends with her,” he turned around to look at you.

Clarisse has been wondering the same thing for the past few days. The Apollo cabin and the Ares cabin weren’t known to be friendly with each other. They tolerated each other at best when they were on the same team for Capture the Flag, but that was it. And when you left, she started to wonder about your friendship. Maybe you’d forget about her once you’re back at home. And the first week, all she could think about was when – or if – you’d reach out.

But every Sunday, at 9:00am she’d receive a package with your recording and pictures and candy for your siblings and her. You had never given her any reason to doubt your relationship, but not everyone in your cabin, or at camp, were thinking that way. Michael had been one of those people, always wondering loud and clear about your friendship. So that was Clarisse’s final straw.

She grabbed Michael’s collar, ready to punch him, but Lee tried to calm the situation down.

“Clarisse, please don’t,” Lee grabbed Michael’s hands, “he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“He clearly does. He’s been talking about it nonstop for the past few weeks.”

You frowned. You looked at Michael, then Lee and finally at Clarisse. The pure rage in her eyes would make anyone run away, but you stepped up.

“Clarisse,” you put your hands on her arms, “it’s fine, let go please. Chiron is waiting for us.”

She locked her eyes with you, clearly still upset about the situation, and pushed Michael away, but Lee was behind to hold him back.

“Clarisse, what was that about?”

“It’s nothing,” she shrugged, “it’s fine. See you.”

And she walked away, leaving you confused. You turned around, giving a questioning look at your brothers, but Lee only mouthed a ‘I don’t know’ and Michael avoided your gaze. You were ready to argue with them, but Will came running, telling you they were ready to leave.

The trip to the Empire State Building was long, especially with Clarisse ignoring you. You tried talking to Michael, but he was also ignoring you, and suddenly, everyone at camp lost their ability to talk. Annoyed, you went to the back of the bus, where no one was. But then Will came.

“What’s wrong? You look like Clarisse all the time. Frowning and sulking.”

“I’m not!” you relaxed your face. “Also while we're talking about Clarisse, what’s that about how we’re not supposed to be friends?”

Will grimaced, and looked away for a second.

“People have been wondering about how you, sweet and fun Apollo daughter, could be friends with ruthless Clarisse La Rue, Ares daughter. Because the Apollo cabin does not get along with the Ares cabin, like at all.”

“And Clarisse was upset? Over people’s opinions about us?”

“Well…” Will stretched that vowel for far too long. “You know people, and how they love to gossip. And somehow it went from enemy cabins to how there are better friends to have… than Clarisse. And how she’s not… worth it,” he hesitated. “And she only brings you trouble… things like that.”

You were too stunned to give any type of answers.

“Clarisse doesn’t look like someone who cares about those kind of rumours and speculations, but insecurities are created by people’s opinion,” Will said, “that’s what Lee told me when people were talking about me and I started to feel bad.”

“What were people talking about?” you frowned.

“I’m not as good as you all with my archery skills.”

“That’s not–, I mean it doesn’t matter.”

“I know, Lee and Cornelia and Michael and everyone at our cabin was there to tell me that.”

“Okay, and they’re right.”

“I’m saying… maybe Clarisse doesn't have that sort of support system. And maybe she is starting to feel like other people are right.”

“Oh.”

You looked at where Clarisse was sitting, in the middle, sitting next to her sister. It was a four seat table, and her three siblings were all laughing and shouting, but Clarisse wasn’t. She was staring out the window, her arms crossed.

You saw her frown and turned her head in your direction, but when she saw you looking at her, she quickly turned her head to her siblings.

“You should talk to her, and clear things up. Because Clarisse is nice. I like her.”

“Since when? You never talk.”

“Clarisse is nice to me, she always has been since we’ve met that one time,” he admitted. “I think she deserves good friends. Like us.”

“I think so too,” you agreed.

When it was time to get off the bus, everyone rushed out, separating you from Clarisse even further. Well, the talk had to wait.

The trip to the 600th floor took too long. Every cabin went one by one since it couldn’t hold the whole camp at once. The Ares cabin went before the Apollo cabin, but Clarisse stood straight and looked ahead. She had her back turned to you, even once inside the elevator, but at the last minute she turned around and locked eyes with you.

“We’ll talk,” you mouthed clearly.

There was no escaping you. When it was your turn, you stepped in last so you could leave first. It took forever to reach floor 600. And just as you expected, there was no sign of Clarisse. She stayed close to her brothers.

Each cabin had to do a presentation in front of the gods, and it was the worst thing for them and for you all too. Every time they clapped at the end, you knew it wasn’t as a compliment but more as a cheers to being closer to the end.

After that, there was a big feast. The gods watching you eat and burn your food for them – it was weird and you couldn’t keep your eyes off your father. His tanned skin, golden hair, and bright smile.

“Blinding isn’t he,” Lee said.

“Yeah, I should’ve brought my sunglasses. Do you ever talk?”

“Not much. They don’t come just to hang around their kids.”

“He kinda looks like a classmate I’d have if people at my school weren’t all dressed like they just left prison. He looks young.”

“You’ll get used to it eventually,” Lee shrugged.

After dinner, campers just hang around talking, and some of the gods would come and talk to their children. You looked around and spotted the Hermes cabin staying together, far away from the main event, and then you tried to look for Clarisse, but she was nowhere. You turned around and bumped into your father. You quickly stepped away.

“Sorry,” you mumbled.

“It’s alright. How have you been? Have you been settling well with everything?” he smiled.

“Um… Yes.”

What more could you say? You weren’t going to start saying the truth to this god that happened to be your father.

“How is your mother?”

“Great,” you nodded, smiling. “She’s been seeing someone you know, after,” you looked at your wrist and pretended there was a watch, “eighteen years of having no one.”

“y/n,” he sighed looking away, “that’s just how things work with us gods. She knew from the start who I was, I told her.”

“It’s fine. I was merely stating a fact.”

Please somebody end this conversation, you prayed.

“Well, well, well,” someone slapped your dad’s shoulder.

“Ares,” your dad greeted him. “This is y/n, my daughter.”

“Ah, the girl my daughter has been seeing.”

Apollo whipped his head around, beaming at you.

“You have a girlfriend?” he held you in his arms. “I’m so proud of you. Way to go, who and where is the lucky girl.”

You stared at him, and then at Ares, mouth wide open in shock.

“I– I don’t! It’s– It’s not!” you stuttered. “I don’t have a girlfriend. Clarisse is my friend, who is a girl indeed. So yeah girl,” you paused, “friend. I haven’t been seeing her, I’ve been seeing her as in, she lives at camp and so did I during the summer!”

“Oh,” he let go of you. “My bad. You could’ve been more clear,” he looked at Ares. “Well I have to go now,” he walked away. “See you soon, y/n.”

Ares didn’t follow your father. He stayed with you, staring at you. Clarisse looked at you the same way when you first arrived at camp.

“I feel like I know you from somewhere,” you admitted.

“Well, I am the war god. They had to have shown you my picture somewhere between those classes they have,” he nodded toward Chiron.

“No, it’s not that,” you frowned.

Meanwhile, Clarisse was talking to Mark when she spotted Apollo leaving in a hurry, and she looked at where he came from. And her eyes spotted you immediately, and then she saw her father standing tall, towering over you.

“Fuck,” she mumbled before leaving the conversation without any notice.

She rushed to where you stood. There was no way she was going to let you alone with her father.

“... on twitter!” you shouted, hiding a smile. “Clarisse, I was just telling your father about us knowing each other through twitter!”

“What?” she mumbled, pulling you closer to her.

“I’m always starting fights with him on twitter, because he’s always talking shit and nonsense. He doesn’t know me though.”

“Wait–,” Ares interrupted. “Are you that fan account of that blonde singer?”

“Yes!” you laughed.

He snickered, then stopped and turned to Clarisse.

“Clarisse.”

“Dad.”

Then he stared at you, before going back to Clarisse.

“You can leave now,” he gave you a brief look. “I want to talk to Clarisse. Alone.”

Clarisse, who the whole time didn’t let go of your hand, squeezed it. Hard. Before letting go. But you didn’t move, slightly worried.

“I–,” you started, but Clarisse turned to you, face blank.

“I’ll find you after this, go.”

You nodded without arguing and left. You quickly spotted your siblings and joined them, listening to what they were saying. You’d glance at Clarisse’s direction, and all you could see was Clarisse nodding, looking at her feet. Ares was in his human form, but even like that he looked impressive. He was tall and broad, he had these eyes you didn’t want to look straight into from fear. He gave Clarisse a final, firm, pat on the shoulder before leaving her there. She stood there for a full minute before straightening her back and searched for you in the ocean of people. But before she could find you, you were already on your way to her.

“Are you okay?” you immediately asked.

“I’m fine.”

“What did he say to you?”

“He…” she hesitated. “It doesn’t matter.”

You stood there, torn between insisting and letting it go. If you insisted when she wasn’t ready to talk, then you’d be a pushy friend who doesn’t respect any boundaries. But if you didn’t, then maybe it’d seem like you didn’t care.

“Okay,” you nodded slowly. “Well, if you don’t have anything more to say, I do.”

“y/n…” Clarisse sighed.

“No! You ignored me the whole day when I just came back for you. And then that thing that happened with Michael,” she rolled her eyes at the mention of his name, “what was that about?”

“It doesn’t—”

“Stop saying that! It does matter. It matters to me how you feel. About this and everything else.”

Clarisse stared at you. Her eyes pleading with you to let it go.

“I just…” you sighed, defeated. “I don’t want this to ruin our friendship. And I don’t—” you groaned in frustration. “Will told me,” you admitted, “about what people have been saying and what Michael has been saying,” you found it hard to find your words. “I– I want you to know that’s not what I think. And I—.”

You should’ve been rehearsing this. You took a deep breath.

“They’re not right about this. And I don’t want you to think that they are. Because you, Clarisse La Rue, are the best friend anyone could ask for. And because of you, I’m better than ever. I’ve been a better fighter because of you, I’ve been a better friend because of you. You taught me how to stand up for myself, and I’ve just been happier since I’ve met you. So I don’t want you to listen to what people have to say.”

Clarisse still hadn’t said anything, which was excruciating. Just as you were about to continue ranting about this, she pulled you in her arms. You wrapped your arms around her, and put your head on her shoulder.

“Thank you,” she whispered, and let go.

It didn’t last long enough, but you’ll take what she gave you.

“Are we ok?”

“We’re ok,” Clarisse nodded.

The rest of the evening was spent with you sitting on some big rocks that served as chairs, catching up. She’d tell about all the times she won at Capture the Flag, she’d tell you about the indigestion everyone had due to food poisoning that one day, she’d tell you about that time she had to go to the infirmary and only let Will heal her because there was no way she’d let Michael help her. She’d tell you about every little thing you’d miss during those months when you went home, and you listened to everything she had to say, with your head resting on her shoulder.

“Oh gods,” you straightened your back, pointing ahead of you. “Is that your dad with Aphrodite?”

“Fuck,” she cringed. “Are they making out?”

“I mean– he definitely is. It’s weird,” you looked away, then went back to staring at them.

“Stop staring at my dad sucking the goddess of love’s face.”

“Are you sure he’s your dad though? Cause Aphrodite looks exactly like you.”

Clarisse whipped her head around, eyes wide, staring at you.

“What?” she breathed.

“What, what?”

She paused, still staring at you.

“Nothing,” she smiled, and then looked back, “they’re gone.”

“Finally. It’s gross to make out in front of your children like that.”

All the campers spent the night in Olympus, all sleeping in the same area. The room looked exactly like inside a normal cabin at camp, with bunk beds and cupboards, and for once, friends from different cabins were allowed to sleep together. You dragged Clarisse with you, where the Apollo cabin stayed.

“We’re all used to staying together,” you explained, “but you can stay with me. Are you sleeping on the top bunk or bottom one?”

“Bottom one,” Clarisse sat on the bed.

“Ooh,” Cornelia sat next to Clarisse,” so does y/n.”

“It’s fine, it’s only for one night,” you waved it off.

“Did you see Clarisse’s dad making out in the open with their mother,” Cornelia pointed at the Aphrodite children.

“We did!” you squealed, squeezing yourself between the two of them.

“I think everyone did,” Clarisse added.

“Did you notice how Aphrodite looked exactly like Clarisse,” you looked at Cornelia.

Her eyes widened, and shook her head slightly. Clarisse was leaning against the bed frame, her legs crossed on the bed, smirking. You frowned.

“What?” you mouthed.

“We’ll come back”, Cornelia dragged you away.

“What?”

“Do you know what it means to perceive Aphrodite, the goddess of love, beauty, passion and lust, as someone you know?” she asked.

“As someone I know? What does that mean?”

“Aphrodite doesn’t look like Clarisse,” she explained, “you perceive the goddess as such because you think Clarisse is those things.”

“Oh,” you paused. “Is that common knowledge or?”

You hoped not.

“Yeah it is, so you probably shouldn’t say those things in front of Clarisse if you’re not…”

“If I’m not what?”

“Nevermind.”

“I already told her, twice now with what happened a few minutes ago. Oh gods, couldn’t you have taught me this earlier!” you panicked. “What–What does that mean though? Do I– Am I—,” you gave a quick glance at Clarisse.

“I don’t know! I mean, you did ask her on a date like the first week you arrived at camp, what could that mean?”

“I don’t know? I think she’s pretty, and– and apparently I think she could look exactly like the goddess of love herself. It’s—,” you took a deep breath.

“It’s fine, you don’t have to know.”

“I think,” you hesitated. “I don’t know!” you whined. “Clarisse is nice to me, she’s fun to be around, she’s pushing me upwards and I think I might– maybe– perhaps have a tiny crush on her, yes,” you admitted.

“Aw,” she beamed, “I think you’d make such a cute couple.”

“Calm your tits down,” you playfully rolled your eyes, “I don’t know if this will ever go further than us being friends. Now look natural, and never tell anyone else this. Okay, let’s go back.”

Clarisse was talking to Will when you two came back, but they abruptly stopped. Will stood so Cornelia and you could sit.

“What was that about?” Cornelia asked them.

“It’s a secret,” Will smiled.

“We were talking about how sunshine over there thought I looked like a goddess,” Clarisse grinned.

Will tried to hide his laugh.

“No one told me!” you hid your face in your hand from embarrassment. “You could’ve stopped me the first time I said it,” you accused Clarisse, who was still laughing.

“The first?” Will interrupted.

“Both times in front of Clarisse,” Cornelia added. “It was hard to watch,” she teased you.

Time went by very fast when you’re surrounded by friends and family, because it was already time to go to sleep. The lights disappeared, and you climbed onto your bed, and whispered Clarisse a goodnight before closing your eyes.

The silence was deafening. You couldn’t fall asleep, you needed white noises, music, anything but this. You tossed around, left your right leg outside the blanket, but then it was too cold, so you put it back inside, and tossed around again.

“What the hell y/n,” Clarisse whispered loudly.

“Sorry, I can’t fall asleep.”

“Why?” she sighed.

“It’s too quiet, and I’m cold.”

Clarisse let out a bigger sigh, before getting up.

“Where’re you going?” you sat up.

“Get down here, and bring your blanket.”

You did as she told you. You put the blanket on your shoulders and climbed down.

“Get in the bed,” she pointed at hers.

You did as she told you. And then she climbed back inside her bed, next to you, with both blankets on you. The beds on Olympus were bigger than the ones at camp, so it was no problem to fit you two in one single bed.

“Better?”

“Yes,” you nodded.

Clarisse fell asleep very quickly, like always. As soon as she closed her eyes, she was gone. But it took more time with you, you were used to looking at your phone until your eyelids were too tired to stay open, but now you couldn’t. You had nothing, only Clarisse sleeping peacefully next to you.

She slept on her back, with her head tilted toward you. Unlike her, you slept on your side, so you turned your back to her, and closed your eyes. And just as you were about to fall asleep, you felt Clarisse arms wrapping around you to bring you closer to her. And then, in an instant, you were gone.

The happiness from staying at camp didn’t last long as it was already time to go home and say goodbye to everyone. Your holidays came to an end and so did your stay at camp, and just like last time, Clarisse was already waiting for you at the entrance.

“So,” you started, ‘I guess we’ll see each other next summer?”

“Yea,” she nodded. “Next summer.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” you promised, “and I’ll keep sending you updates, though I don’t know if I’ll continue to be as regular as before. I do have my high school diploma to get, and I’ll have less time but I’ll do my best!”

“It’s okay, good luck on your exams. I know you’ll do great.”

“Thanks,” you smiled, but still didn’t leave.

It was too soon, and it felt like you barely spent any time with Clarisse and your siblings.

“Did you say goodbye to Will and the others?” Clarisse asked.

“Yea, before I left the cabin I did. It sucks that I have to, but–,” you hesitated, “maybe I won’t have to next year.”

“You wouldn’t?”

“I don’t know yet, but… it’s a possibility.”

“Oh,” she smiled, “okay.”

“Okay. Well… I have to go now.”

“Okay.”

You two stood there, without moving. But then you lunged forward and hugged her tightly.

“I’ll miss you,” you whispered.

And you let go, and left before she could give you her answer.

One recording per week became one every other week, and by December, it was only one per month. Clarisse didn’t send anything from December to February either, but then on a random day in March, you received a package from Hermes Express with Clarisse’s usual pictures from camp, without any notes explaining what happened those last few months. You didn’t mention it either, but you gave yourself a quick reminder to ask her when you’d be back at camp.

“It’s almost time, are you ready?” your mom asked.

“Yep, a minute!”

Your exams were done, you didn’t have the results yet but that didn’t matter – your mom promised she’d send them to you once she’d receive them so you could leave for camp peacefully. You packed lightly – a third of your belongings were already at camp – and went inside the cab your mom had called for you.

“Be careful okay,” she kissed your temple. “And write to me about your decision, okay?”

“I will, I promise,” you gave her a last quick hug and closed the cab door.

The journey to camp felt familiar now, you’d done it a few times already so it was a stress free trip. So you kept your suitcase close to you, you turned your phone off, and walked.

But something was off when you got closer to the entrance. It was loud. Louder than usual, and there were more people at the border everywhere as well, which were usually empty. You crossed the entrance, and most campers were wearing their gears, and weapons.

“What the hell,” you whispered.

You quickly noticed Clarisse, giving orders to campers, and walking around. When she turned around, she spotted you and ran to you, very quickly.

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier when you were going to be here!” she shot.

“I wanted to surprise you! Why are you yelling at me!” you shouted back.

Clarisse stepped back and mouthed a quick apology.

“A lot of things happened while you were gone,” she explained.

“Like when you stopped sending me anything?”

She nodded reluctantly.

“A new camper came in, got claimed by Poseidon, and then got his quest to retrieve Zeus’ stolen bolt, and…” she hesitated. “We know who stole it in the first place. Luke.”

“Luke?” your eyes widened. “As in Castellan, Hermes' head– former head counsellor?”

She nodded again.

“And now Thalia’s tree has been poisoned, meaning the camp’s borders are weakened and we have to keep them safe ourselves.”

“Okay,” you proceeded with this information as fast as you could. “Okay.”

“I was worried sick for the past few days! You didn’t send me anything like last time. I didn’t know when you were going to be here, or if you’d gotten attacked and died.”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t know. Why didn’t you tell me this earlier!” you argued.

“I–,” she hesitated, “I didn’t want to burden you with your studies.”

“They’re not important, this is obviously my priority and much more important.”

“Okay,” she looked around. “Stay beside me, I want to keep an eye on you whenever a battle is going to break out.”

You frowned.

“That’s cute, but I’d be much more useful if I stayed with the rest of the Apollo cabin where we’re needed. I’m a great fighter, I know,” you said before she could interrupt, “thanks to you, but I’m much better at archery.”

She stared at you, then looked down.

“I can’t…” she whispered, “I can’t protect you if you’re this far away from me.”

“Clarisse,” you cupped her face. “I’ll be fine, I promise. You worry about staying alive, and I’ll do the same. It’s going to be fine. Remember, you taught me everything I know.”

She nodded reluctantly.

“Okay.”

“Where’s your spear by the way?” you asked when she walked you to your cabin.

She grimaced, and sighed.

“Gone.”

“Gone? Wha–.”

“Percy Jackson,” she spat. “The new kid, I’m sure you’ll meet him soon enough.”

You threw your stuff inside your cabin, and changed your clothes before walking out with Clarisse still outside, waiting for you. Clarisse was about to talk, but was interrupted by screams from campers at the entrance.

You looked at each other and ran off to where the screams were, and saw it. Two immense bulls – colchis Bulls – coming straight towards campers.

“Go find Lee, I’ll handle this from here. He’ll know what to do,” Clarisse ordered before walking away.

“Clarisse!” you shouted before she was out of range. She turned her head. “Be careful.”

She nodded.

“Don’t die,” she added before leaving.

#clarisse la rue x reader #clarisse la rue fanfic #clarisse la rue x y/n #clarisse la rue pjo #clarisse la rue x you #clarisse la rue imagine #clarisse la rue

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atlabeth · 2 months

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everything happens for a reason part 22 - zuko x fem!reader

I've been waiting on you

part 21 | masterlist | part 23

a/n: UHHH happy one year anniversary of me not updating!! i missed it by a day but honestly that's very in character. i kind of have no excuse for taking a year long break from this. lol. all i can really say is i lost all my avatar inspo and got really into a bunch of other things and poor little ehfar got left in the corner abandoned!!! but i could never abandon this it's my baby and even if it takes me 1000 years to finish it i will finish it. it's kind of embarrassing that it took so long for this to come out and it's a short filler chapter like who do i think i am.... but everyone is happy and on the beach and yn finally gets some clothes of her own after spending like 7 chapters in prison clothes. anyways enjoy (three more chapters left what?? will it take me 3 years who knows)

wc: 4.8k

warning(s): yn and zuko talk about their pasts and what theyve been through but overall this is a very fluffy chapter

chapter title from seasons (waiting on you) by future islands

The days after their arrival back to the island passed by with relative ease.

Y/N practiced waterbending with Katara and Aang so she could work on getting the hang of it again. She’d been close to mastery before Ba Sing Se, and her muscle memory was stronger than she realized, but prison and the months without her bending had weakened her. Zuko continued working with Aang on his firebending under the looming deadline of the comet.

Sokka and Suki trained with each other too, working on their hand to hand and sword fighting, and Y/N would occasionally join in to stay sharp on what Suki had taught her back in prison. Her time without her bending made her realize how much she relied solely on it, and she never wanted to feel defenseless again.

They continued to share stories every night over a campfire. They all had plenty to talk about after everything they’d been through, especially when Zuko had been against them for half the time, Suki was leading the Kyoshi Warriors, and Y/N was stuck behind bars.

And of course, Zuko and Y/N spent as much time together as they possibly could. They were practically attached at the hip—sitting together at meals, watching one another bend on their breaks, training against each other the way they used to, exploring the island together, just being with each other. After everything they’d been through, Y/N thought they deserved it.

Eventually though, it was decided that they had to leave. Being in Fire Nation territory, even in the middle of nowhere, was risky. They were running out of food and supplies in general, and the possibility that Fire Nation ships would still somehow discover them weighed on their minds. They couldn’t afford to get caught so far into their mission, especially with the traitor prince of the Fire Nation on their side.

Zuko’s idea, however, was possibly even riskier.

“Ember Island?” Y/N asked hesitantly. “That’s… bold.”

“We’re already being bold by staying in Fire Nation territory,” Zuko said. “We’re safe from Azula for now, but it’s only a matter of time before she somehow finds us again.” He shrugged. “My family’s vacation home is the last spot anyone will think to look.”

“I think it’s a great idea,” Sokka said. “It’ll be nice to not fight for our lives for a minute before we make the final push.”

Aang adjusted his hold on the reins—they’d already packed up Appa and started flying before Zuko proposed his idea—and shrugged. “I’m okay with it. Zuko and I will be able to keep training, and you all can relax in an actual house.”

“And we’ll be able to go to the beach!” Toph exclaimed. “I’ve been meaning to work on my sandbending. And,” she grinned, “I’m betting none of you have heard of sandball fights.”

“We’re really getting ourselves into something,” Katara said dryly.

Y/N smiled and she leaned into Zuko’s side. He wrapped his arm around her immediately and pulled her closer.

“I’ve always wondered what Ember Island was like,” Y/N mused. “I was always so jealous when you and Azula got to go there on vacation every summer and I was stuck at the palace.”

“You weren’t missing much,” Zuko said wryly. “Yeah, there’s beaches, but mostly it was just unbearably hot.” He frowned. “My father still made me do work even when we were supposed to be on vacation. I’ve done a lot of swordfighting here.”

“I missed you,” she said, and she knew that she would never get tired of seeing Zuko’s cheeks flush red.

“Really?” he asked. “Even then?”

“Especially then,” she clarified. “It wasn’t like I had much going on for me there. The palace was extremely boring without you.”

“Spirits, you guys are gross,” Sokka groaned as he looked out at the sky. “Suki and I haven’t been like this, have we?”

Katara chuckled. “You definitely have. You could barely stay off of each other when you got back from the Boiling Rock.”

“Just imagine what they were like when they first got back together,” Zuko said with a frown.

“Neither of you can say anything,” Toph asserted. “I can hear both of your heartbeats shoot up every time you’re around Y/N and Suki.”

Zuko scowled, Sokka’s face flushed, and Suki and Y/N just smiled at each other.

“So Ember Island is a yes?” Aang asked. When everyone nodded in agreement, he looked at Zuko. “I’m in need of your navigation skills, Sifu Hotman.”

He groaned. “I told you to stop calling me that.”

“I know,” Aang said cheerfully.

Zuko just sighed, and he kissed Y/N on the cheek before he moved to sit next to Aang. She smiled, and she let her hand hang over the side of the saddle.

“...I guess it is nice not seeing you two argue all the time,” Sokka said after a moment.

“It’s nice that you two aren’t moping around all the time either,” Toph added. “That was kind of annoying.”

“Imagine how I felt,” Y/N said, though it was absent minded as her gaze stayed on Zuko.

“I don’t have to imagine it,” Toph said. “You were very clearly mopey.”

“And when you weren’t mopey, you were angry,” Suki contributed. “You said you were imagining Zuko’s face whenever I taught you new moves at the Boiling Rock. You beat him up a lot there.”

Sokka and Toph laughed, but it was a moment before she said anything. It took Katara saying her name for her to turn back around, and when Y/N did, she blinked for a moment. “What?”

Katara chuckled, glancing at Zuko before she looked back at her. “We’re just glad you’re back.”

Her expression instantly brightened as she smiled. “I’m glad to be back.”

It didn’t take long for them to arrive at Ember Island—and if it did, Y/N was far too busy conversing with her friends and watching Zuko for it to matter. She grimaced as she slid off of Appa, one hand taking Zuko’s and the other wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead.

“Spirits,” she mumbled, “I thought I was used to Fire Nation heat by now.”

“Me too,” Sokka groaned. “But this is already worse than all the other places we’ve been to.”

“Ember Island’s always been like this,” Zuko said. “The good news is that it’s Ember Island. There’s plenty of beaches—we’ve even got our own private one.”

“Good for practicing waterbending,” Katara said with a glance at Aang.

“Good for practicing all kinds of bending,” Zuko said. “You’re gonna need to practice your firebending every day if you want to stand a chance against my father. We’re running out of time and you’re nowhere close to being a master.”

Aang frowned. “Way to bring down the mood, Zuko.”

“I’m being realistic!” he defended. “You can’t just end one hundred years of war with some good luck and an optimistic mindset!”

Sokka shrugged. “It’s worked for us so far.”

Zuko opened his mouth to say something that would definitely cause an argument. Before he could, Y/N laughed, looping her arm through his and tugging him along.

“Come on,” she said. “Show us around.”

Zuko sighed, though his show of annoyance was negated as he pulled Y/N closer. “Fine. It is about time I’ve brought you here.”

“Ugh.” Toph kicked at the sand with her foot. “I think Zuko’s just brought us along on his couples vacation.”

“Oh, quiet,” she joked. “We’ve earned it.”

Toph stuck her tongue out. “Doesn’t mean we can’t complain about it.”

Y/N chuckled as they walked together, the rest of the group trailing behind them.

“Spirits, Zuko,” Sokka marveled when they stepped inside the house. “This is huge.”

“It is the summer home of the royal family,” he said dryly. “My father never settles for anything less than perfection. It also gave us more room to avoid each other when he was causing arguments.”

“I can’t imagine that happened a lot,” Katara said sarcastically.

“Never,” Zuko agreed with the same tone. “He almost burned down the place a few times.”

Aang frowned. “Sounds like a great guy.”

“I know you’re not a violence guy, but if there’s anyone you’d enjoy fighting, it’s my dad,” Zuko muttered.

“I’ll do it for the good of the world,” Aang said. “Not because I’ll enjoy it.”

Zuko grimaced and opened his mouth to say something, but Y/N interrupted once more before they could devolve into this conversation again.

“Like Sokka said, this place is huge.” She placed a hand on Zuko’s arm. “Will we have our own rooms?”

Zuko’s brows creased a bit, but he nodded after a moment. “Yeah. There should be enough for all of us.”

“Suki and I can share,” Sokka said, stretching his arms out casually to reach one around Suki. She laughed and leaned her head against his chest, and he looked far too pleased with himself. “Tryna make up for lost time, y’know?”

“Gross,” Toph scoffed. “I’ll take my own room, please.”

Aang glanced at Katara for a moment before he cleared his throat and nodded at Zuko. “Yeah. Me too.”

Katara was too busy looking at a mask sitting on a mantle. She picked it up and glanced back at Zuko. “What is this from?”

“One of my mother’s favorite plays,” he said. “She was an actress before she married my father, and every time we came here, we’d always go see some shows. They gave her the mask of the lead character after the end of one production a few years ago, as thanks for her patronage.”

“Oh, we should definitely go see a play while we’re here!” Y/N exclaimed. “I got my hands on some old play scripts when I was still working in the palace, and the other servants and I would spend hours reenacting our favorite parts.” She chuckled. “It would be nice to see actual actors do it.”

“We should be able to carve out some time for that,” Zuko said. “Between all the training, of course.”

“You are such a downer,” Aang groaned.

“I’m seeing the full picture!” he defended. “We’ve still got a lot of work to do—just because we’re at our vacation home doesn’t mean we’re on vacation.”

“After all this is over, we definitely deserve a vacation,” Sokka muttered. “Before all the rebuilding and restructuring and relegislating starts…” The smile fell from his face. “Wow. We’re never gonna get a vacation.”

“Oh, perk up, ponytail,” Toph said. “We’re going to end the endless war and defeat the undefeatable Fire Lord. If we want to take a vacation, no one can really stop us.”

The smile reappeared with surprising quickness. “That’s true!”

Zuko laughed softly. “Your rooms should be on the first floor. You can explore and divide the rooms yourselves. I,” he looked at Y/N, “want to show you something.”

She smiled as Zuko pulled her closer with an arm around her shoulder and made for the stairs, leaving a rapidly growing argument over room selection in their wake.

“Do you think they’ll have decided by the time we get back down?” Zuko asked.

Y/N shrugged. “This is the first time they’re sleeping in rooms instead of camping on the ground in… Spirits. Since Ba Sing Se, I think. I wouldn’t be surprised if they go at it all night.”

He chuckled as they stopped in front of a room, and Zuko pushed open the door so they could walk in together.

“This was my room whenever we came here,” he said. “I figured we could share it.”

“This is the height of luxury,” Y/N commented, stepping out of Zuko’s embrace to run her hand over the sheets. Her lips quirked into a smile. “I can’t believe you slept on a bed like this every night.”

“You’re telling me they don’t have this kind of stuff in the North?” Zuko asked wryly.

“No,” she chuckled, “definitely not. We were more focused on not freezing.”

“Well, we’re more focused on pointless displays of luxury,” he said, “so you’re not too far off.”

Zuko ignited the tip of his finger and began lighting candles around the room, and Y/N glanced at him with amusement as she sat down on the bed.

“Mood lighting,” he explained with the sliver of a smile. “I think we deserve some time alone after the past few days.”

She pressed a hand to her chest. “You know the way straight to my heart.”

Once he was done he sat down next to her, and Y/N intertwined their hands together and pulled him down so they were laying on their backs. She rested her head on Zuko’s chest and he moved his arm around her to keep her close, tracing lazy circles on her shoulder.

“Wonderful mattress,” she sighed. “So this was what you were up to while I was sewing clothes and doing endless loads of laundry.”

“I thought about you a lot more than you probably think,” Zuko said. She turned her head a bit to look at him, slightly surprised, and he shrugged. “Honestly? When we were kids, I thought about you pretty much constantly. My father always told me not to talk to servants, but I didn’t see you as anything other than my friend. You were… kind of my only normal friend.”

“Well, you were kind of my only friend, period. All the other servants were way older—they just felt like a different version of my mom.” Y/N’s gaze rose to the ceiling. “I wonder how they’re all doing.”

“They should be okay,” Zuko said. “No one really caused as much trouble as we did.”

Y/N laughed as her gaze flitted around the room, taking in all the details. A portrait of the royal family hung on the wall, while a much smaller, lone portrait of Zuko sat on a desk in the corner. He didn’t look very happy, but she couldn’t imagine sitting for that many paintings as a child was fun. What looked to be a half-finished message sat on the desk, the ends of the scroll rolling up and obscuring most of the inked letters. A neat stack of towels and blankets were on top of a clothing chest in the other corner, and she chuckled a bit. In her experience of doing his laundry in their youth, it seemed to be something he still hadn’t grown out of.

“I can practically see little Zuko running in here after a day at the beach,” she mused. “The ends of his clothes singed from fighting with Azula, his hair drenched from swimming, getting sand all over the sheets.”

“I wasn’t that messy of a child,” he complained. “I… I did come home with my clothes singed a couple times, though.”

She chuckled. “I know. My mother had to fix a lot of your outfits because of it.”

“It’s not my fault that ‘hide and blast’ was her idea of fun!” he defended.

“Hide and blast?”

“One person hides, the other person searches. By… blasting fire everywhere.” Zuko shook his head. “I don’t know all kids around the Fire Nation were as crazy as us or if Azula invented it herself.”

“...Yeah,” Y/N said with a slight laugh. “We definitely didn’t play that in my village.”

“Of course you didn’t,” he said. “None of you were firebenders.”

“I was the only waterbender in the village though,” she said. “There were a couple other earthbender kids, but it made me feel so special. We would always play together and try to mix our bending together.” A small yet wistful smile tugged at her lips. “That feels like forever ago, though.”

“I know what you mean,” Zuko murmured. “I was banished three years ago, but a lifetime has changed since then.”

“For the better?” Y/N murmured.

She could feel Zuko nod. “Definitely.”

Their door was then pushed open more, and Suki poked her head in through the gap. A grin appeared on her face at their closeness.

“I see the lovebirds are making themselves at home,” she mused.

Y/N laughed as she sat up, pulling Zuko with her. She smiled at the sight of his flushed cheeks. “We’re trying.”

“We believe in knocking here in the Fire Nation,” Zuko grumbled.

“The door was open,” Suki said cheerfully. “And I’d like to steal your girl for an afternoon outing.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “What for?”

“Well, I’d like to explore the island some, and I figure we’re the lowest profile out of our whole group,” she said. “We’ve also missed out on some shopping while we were stuck in prison—we’ve gotta get our hands on some Fire Nation clothes.”

Y/N’s eyes lit up. “That’s a great idea! Leya’s dress is beautiful, but Earth Kingdom clothing sticks out a bit more than I want.”

“And I’m in literal prison clothes,” Suki said. “The sooner we’re in red, the better.”

“That’s… probably smart,” Zuko amended. “There’s some gold pieces in my bag. It should be more than enough for both of you.”

“Are you sure?” Y/N frowned. “You don’t have to—”

“You think I didn’t take a bunch of money from the palace before I left?” Zuko asked wryly. “Don’t worry about it.”

Suki’s smile grew. “Just call it reparations.”

Zuko huffed a laugh, but Y/N cut him off as she pulled him in for a kiss.

“You’ll be alright while we’re gone?”

“Of course,” he said. “This is my home, after all. If anything, I should be asking you that.”

“I’ve got the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors with me,” Y/N said. “If anyone decides to mess with us, it’s going to be their problem—not ours.”

Suki laughed and gestured with her head, and Y/N stood up and started walking backwards. “I’ll see you later—try to have some fun here.”

“I don’t have fun,” he called out as she was walking out, and she just shook her head with a smile.

“You’re really dating a ball of sunshine there, aren’t you?” Suki joked.

Y/N bit back her growing smile. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The rest of the day went by in a breeze.

Y/N and Suki spent a few hours in town, chatting and shopping and even doing some reconnaissance at the end, just to make sure they were truly undercover at the vacation home. Doing rookie spy work with a Kyoshi Warrior was surprisingly just as fun as the shopping part—and after what she and Zuko did to free her village, it was surprisingly easy.

The sun was still high in the sky when they got back, dressed head to toe in Fire Nation finery. Zuko and Aang were in the midst of training when the two of them went around back to find their friends, and when he saw Y/N, his fire died out and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

(“Yeah,” Zuko had stammered when she asked his opinion, “You look really good.”

“Thanks,” she said, and she felt the heat rush to her cheeks. “I feel pretty good.”

“Fire Nation clothes suit you,” he said, and he pulled her into a kiss. “It’s about time you’ve gotten some.”

“Technically, I wore them for a few months,” she said wryly. “Prison clothes and all.”

Zuko scoffed. “That doesn’t count.”

“And I wore them for most of my childhood,” she mused. “Servant clothes and all.”

“That counts even less!” he insisted.

“But thank you,” Y/N finally said with a smile. “I was hoping you would like them.”

It was an effort to bite back her joy every time Zuko would sneak a look at her while they continued their training.)

The rest of the day was just mostly spent getting used to everything. The last time the vacation home had been occupied was when Zuko, Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee visited, so a lot of adjustments needed to be made.

Katara insisted on washing all the sheets, and Y/N decided to join in because of her waterbending—Aang wanted to talk with Katara, Zuko wanted to be with Y/N, Toph wanted to ask him a bunch of questions about Ember Island, and Sokka didn’t want to be left out, so soon enough, the seven of them were all sitting on the steps of the house doing laundry and telling stories.

Soon enough, the sun had set and the house had been cleaned what felt like ten times over. Everyone had retired to their own devices except for Y/N and Zuko, who were walking along the shore arm in arm.

“I think I like beaches,” she mused. “The nearest ocean had no beach back home, and all we had in the North was ice. You Fire Nation folk are lucky.”

Zuko chuckled. “I don’t know if it’s luck. We’re just one big island with a lot of humidity.”

“Still,” she leaned her head on his shoulder, “it’s nice. We should visit here together once all this is over.”

“Of course,” he nodded. “I know I’m going to be the Fire Lord if all goes well, but there’s going to be a lot of diplomacy trips.” She felt his eyes on her. “You can join me on all of them.”

“Of course,” she repeated. “The Fire Lord’s Earth Kingdom-born, waterbending girlfriend will be so welcome.”

“If you’ve learned one thing through all of this, it should be that I don’t care what anyone thinks when it comes to you,” Zuko said. “I want you there with me. You want to be there with me. That’s reason enough.”

Y/N chuckled, and she ran her thumb over Zuko’s knuckles. His hands housed callouses, borne from hundreds of hours of explosive firebending and sword-fighting and years of life on the road. She always wondered how hands that treated her so softly, that revered her, were so capable of violence.

“I know there’s going to be a lot of expectations for us,” she said. “Especially once you take the throne. But I— I’d like to take things as slow as we can.”

“Of course.” Zuko squeezed her hand, his brows creasing. “I don’t care what anyone says or wants or expects. I love you, Y/N—we’ll go at our own pace.”

“It’s just because we’ve spent the past year trying to kill each other,” Y/N said with a nervous laugh. “If we could spend this next year being in love with each other, that would be really great.”

That actually got a laugh out of Zuko, and he gestured with his head towards the sand. When they sat down, he pulled her into his side. They fit perfectly together.

“Don’t worry,” he murmured. “I think we’ve already gotten a headstart on that.”

“Good,” she said.

Y/N sighed as she moved closer into Zuko’s embrace, his warmth a shield from the cool night breeze. She’d always run cold, and having a personal hearth made things much easier.

“I wish we didn’t have to go through so much to end up with each other,” she murmured.

“Believe me,” Zuko sighed, “I know.”

“But my mother always told me that everything happens for a reason,” Y/N said. “And… I guess she’s right. Because I don’t think we would be here if all this hadn’t happened.” Something inside of her twisted, and though she tried to suppress it, the words came out before she could really think about it. “And sometimes I— I wonder why I’m still here.”

He frowned slightly, allowing a short glance down at her. “What do you mean?”

“I mean… you know what I’ve had to go through to get here. My village, the palace, the North, this journey with Aang, the capital prison, the Boiling Rock…” she shook her head. “Countless others have died or gotten hurt trying to protect me or save me. Our group— we were the first ones ever to escape from the Boiling Rock. So why do I get to be here? Why is my father gone, but I’m still here? I don’t deserve it more than he did. I certainly don’t deserve it more than Yue. So… I don’t know. Sometimes I just can’t understand why I’m the one that got to make it when so many others haven’t.”

“Don’t say that,” Zuko urged.

“It’s not the way you think,” Y/N said honestly. “It just feels like we’ve beaten every single odd.”

“Maybe we have,” he said, “but it’s certainly not out of luck, or chance.” Zuko took her hand and intertwined their fingers together, giving her hand a squeeze. “You fought every step of the way to get here—a lot of the time, you were fighting against me. You’ve earned every good thing you’ve gotten, Y/N, and I think I might spend the rest of my life trying to be someone worthy of you.”

“Zuko,” she lamented, “you already are.”

“It’s not the way you think,” he echoed wryly. “I’ve loved you since the beginning, and despite everything, you still love me too. You kept giving me chances because you believed in me for some stupid reason. I wouldn’t be where I am without that—without you. I want to be the best version of myself every day so you know you made the right choice.”

Y/N felt the heat rush to her cheeks as she smiled, squeezing his hand back. Nowadays, they were almost always touching in some way. Tonight reminded her why—she never felt more comforted, more at peace, then when she was with Zuko.

“You… kind of just hit my next point,” she said with a nervous chuckle, curling into his side further.

“Don’t tell me it’s more self-doubt,” Zuko said.

“I can’t help it!” she defended. “I— I just have to make sure.”

“Of what?”

“That…” Y/N paused, her mouth suddenly dry. “That I’m still the one you want. Even after all that’s happened. After all that’s going to happen.”

Zuko frowned, and he took her other hand, lacing their fingers together. “Of course. Y/N, it’s always been you. It’s been true forever, even if I haven’t always known it.”

“It’s not going to be easy,” she said softly. “I’m Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom. Your people aren’t just going to accept that, especially with you as their leader.”

Zuko actually laughed at that, and he gave her a sideways smile. Months ago, staring into his hardened eyes used to bring her close to tears. Seeing him smile now, reassuring doubts that seemed so pointless in the face of his love—even after everything, Y/N considered herself the luckiest girl in the world.

“Y/N, we’ve gone across the whole world doing things no one ever has,” Zuko said. “The seven of us are going to end a war that’s been going on for a century. Aang is going to defeat my father, and he shouldn’t even be alive. We’ve beat every single odd against us. I think getting my people to like you will be the easiest thing we have to handle.”

“You think so?” she asked. The tension had dissolved some from her shoulders, her worries dissuading with each honeyed word.

“I know so,” Zuko assured. “I’m gonna have to change the Fire Nation from the ground up. There’s no one else I’d want by my side while I do it. My people will see you the way I do, and they’ll love you just as much.”

Y/N leaned closer and pressed a kiss to his lips. Sometimes she still couldn’t get over the fact that she could just… do that. Just kiss him, just smile with him, just be happy with him. Yue shone down on them as she pulled away, Zuko’s features glowing in the moonlight, and Y/N hoped her friend knew she was so much of the reason she’d gotten here.

Happiness seemed out of reach, out of her cards entirely, for such a long time, and when she had it, it always felt like such a precarious thing. Sometimes she still remembered those days in the tea shop, the night in the catacombs.

But with Zuko finally by her side, it was a tangible thing. Something she deserved. Something she already had.

“We’ll do it all together,” she murmured.

“Together,” Zuko agreed.

And she laid back down on the sand, bringing Zuko with her. He pulled her closer, tucked into his side as he wrapped his arm around her. They laid there in silence, Zuko’s warmth heating her from the inside out, staring up at the starry night sky and reveling in the feeling of just being with each other.

Together.

i'll tag ppl here because it's been uhhhhhh fucking YEAR and everyone's prob forgotten it exists and i also did tag lists while this was coming out but please do not ask to be added bc i dont do them anymore!!

ehfar tags: @chandies-sideblog @zacatecanaaaa @anzanity @randomthingssssss @escapingthoughtsandsecrets @shanksfav @shephard17895 @ilovespideyyy @whats-my-question @selfship-mishaps @ilistentotayswifttocope @i-make-questionable-choices @3leni @thatobsessedreader @lostgreekgod @oriontingz @zerode-unhinged @badpvn @mimi-sanisanidiot @adhdhufflepuff @aquaamethyst96 @hollyismentallyillhelp @holypoetrygarden @islandgayneery @pitrii-petra @jinxed-jk @veras-fanfic-reblogs @cloud-9ine @lucifersidepiece @kiskzawagnerwhore @froggi-00 @eajalova @mrsyixingunicorn10 @xxxxxxdelenaxxxxxx @cafesho @the-natureofme @whoevenfrickinknows @a-bit-late @zukowantshishonourback @settlebackeasy @jemssafespace @wildwallflower24 @calmoistorm @mich1551-blog @inutheangel @sagemastah @avrilh

#zuko x reader #zuko x you #zuko x reader fic #zuko #zuko fic #avatar #avatar the last airbender #atla #avatar fic #atla fic #avatar the last airbender fic #atla x reader #avatar x reader #sadie writes #ehfar

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sweetlittlegingy · 1 year

Text

Sweet Nothings

☑︎ Next Chapter | Sweet Nothings Masterlist

☑︎ Pairing: Jake Seresin x Y/n Seresin (Mitchell)

☑︎ Word Count: 5.3 k

☑︎ Warnings: Infertility, IVF, Adoption, Dad!Jake, Teacher/Mom!Reader, Kindergarteners, Y/n mom is a bitch

☑︎ A/n: I'm so excited to share this one with you guys, and I hope you love it just as much as I do.

☑︎ Library (Follow for updates! I no longer have a taglist.)

You can’t seem to stop the shake in your leg while you sit on the bed, and as your hands run across the comforter you pick off a stray piece of lent. Your eyes dart back to the bathroom door, and the pregnancy test that sits on the counter waiting. The little pink and white stick is a hard contrast against the marble countertop, and you can’t help but glare at it.

It had been 4 weeks since your last treatment, and while the doctors said you would get a positive or negative test by the second week, you couldn’t help but wait. As if the extra two weeks would make the embryo take and you would finally be pregnant.

You and Jake had been trying to have a baby for, four years. Just after your one-year anniversary, you both decided that you were ready and that having a little one running around was the next step. You had been 26 and Jake was 28, it felt like the perfect time. Jake was doing amazing in his career and has been permanently stationed at Top Gun. While you had just been hired on as the kindergarten teacher at Bay Park Elementary. Everything was falling into place, just like you had both planned.

Though after the first year and a half with no success naturally, your OBGYN suggested IVF. She had told you that due to your irregular ovulation pattern you would have trouble the natural way and that IVF would fix everything. That was two and a half years ago, and you were now on your third treatment. Each of the past two ended in failure, and with the third result waiting in the bathroom, you didn’t know if you really wanted to check.

Jake had gotten up this morning for an early run, while you enjoyed the fact that it was Saturday, and you could sleep in for a little bit. Though the need to pee came only moments after Jake was out of the house and now you couldn’t go back to sleep. In the five-minute time span, you were supposed to wait, you had made the bed, eaten breakfast, and started a load of laundry. The recommended five minutes quickly turned into twenty and now you were silently sitting and staring from afar.

You knew that Jake would be home soon, his run usually took thirty to forty- five minutes depending on which route he took, and you didn’t need him walking in on you. You hadn’t told him that you were going to take a pregnancy test, and he never pushed you to. Jake had been wonderful through the whole ordeal, helping with the medication injects that “boosted” your ovulation and he had never missed an appointment. And yes, while your father might have been in charge of the Dagger Squad, he didn’t give Jake any special treatment… Well, not a lot and Jake always made sure to figure out his days. Plus, it helped that the IVF hospital was on base, at the San Diego Naval Medical Center. Yet another plus of being married into the military, your insurance offers reduced fees for IVF. It was still expensive, but cheap enough that you had been able to save for each treatment.

Though the grim outlook was the fact that usually after your third treatment, doctors suggested looking into other options. That was another reason you were avoiding the test, you didn’t think you could mentally or physically go through another round of IVF, even with added ideas.

The last four years had been a continuous loop of your body failing you and Jake. He never said it, God he would never. Jake treated you amazingly, but the small nagging voice in the back of your head played the words on repeat. You were a failure as a woman.

You glance at your watch once more, 7:32 am, Jake would be back anytime. It was now or never. You reluctantly push yourself from the comfort of your mattress and quite literally drag your feet to the bathroom. The tile floor has a shiver running up your spine and you silently curse the cooling weather.

It’s sitting upside down on the counter and you just stare at it for a moment. Hands twisting in anxiety as you slowly spin your wedding ring around your finger. The white stick sits there taunting you, begging you to look.

“Fuck it.”

Your hand snatches the test and flips it over before you can rethink the decision. Your fingers shake as you lift it, eyes zeroing in on the clear window where two pink little lines are supposed to be. A harsh breath leaves your chest, and you bite on your bottom lip to stop it from quivering. Your hands are working on autopilot, grabbing the test and wrapping it in toilet roll before tossing it in the small garbage can. You couldn’t look at the single line anymore. You had seen the exact same test results more times than you could count in the last four years and didn’t need to stare at it to know the answer.

Once again, your body had failed you.

Your hands gently brush across the side of your legs, before reaching forward to wash your hands. You dry them quickly, before glancing in the mirror and the small tear resting on your cheek has you releasing a harsh laugh. Your eyes fall shut as you suck your teeth in annoyance, before wiping the tear away and taking another deep calming breath. If it could work for your 5-year-olds, it could work for you.

“It’s fine.”

Your grasp the counter and roll back on your heels, then lean forward releasing another harsh breath. It wasn’t like your heart felt like it was breaking, nope defiantly not that feeling. Your hands harshly smack against the granite counter, and the palm of your hand stung. Though the pain is welcomed, anything that would distract from the ever-growing crack in your heart.

You hear the front door open and shut before Jake is calling out to you. You can hear his shoes padding along the hardwood floors, and you hate when another tear falls from you. You didn’t want to do this to Jake again. He never signed up for this, he wasn’t the broken one.

“Baby?”

“Yeah?”

Your voice cracks and you grit your teeth in frustration. You can feel Jake’s gaze through the mirror, though you really don’t feel like looking. Not when you feel like an utter failure. Your nose sniffles slightly and your hands against the counter tighten, turning your knuckles white.

Your eyes raise to look at Jake through the mirror, though before you can look at him you catch sight of your face. Tear stricken and the harsh gasp you were working so hard to hold in falls. Your chin immediately falls back into your chest as a sob breaks from your lips, and before you know it Jake’s grasping onto you. He’s dripping in sweat, but you could care less, and you fall into his chest as he rocks you. One hand traces up and down your spine, while the other weaves in your hair to hold you as you sob. Every breath is followed by a harsh sob, and you can’t stop the words as they release.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry”

“No, baby. No.”

Jake’s hold on you tightens, as he lays kiss after kiss across the top of your head. You pull away slowly and the hand in your hair comes to rest against your cheek. His thumb rubs small circles and a shuttered breath has you fighting against the way your lips beg to tremble.

“It was negative.”

You watch as a forced smile tugs at his lips and the small tear that traces down his cheek, has you reaching a hand up to brush it away. Your thumb moves over the stubble on his cheek and you give him a small smile, that surely looks like a grimace.

“I love you.”

His words break your heart because it was one thing that you always knew, no matter what Jake would always love you. Even when you feel like he shouldn’t. You gently push up on your toes and place a soft kiss on his lips. It’s short and sweet, but just what you both needed. You settle back on your feet, while Jake cradles your face in both hands and places a kiss on your brow.

“I love you,” Another small unsteady breath falls, “and even though you say you don’t need it. I am s–” Jake’s hand stills your trembling lip as another onset of tears falls. “I am so sorry, that I can’t … I can’t give you a baby.”

The words all but leave your chest before you crumble to the floor as Jake grasps onto your shaking form. His arms wrap around you to pull you into his chest, as sweet nothings are whispered into your hair and you once again, wait for the tears to dry.

…

“Daniel, wait for your mom to cross the road.”

You were on pick-up duty this week and while the older kids were wonderful at waiting inside the school grounds for their parents, your 20 little ones always seemed to slip passed the gate. You wave back to Mrs. Johnson as she takes hold of Daniel's hand. A sigh leaves your body as you glance around and find the school yard nearly empty. 8 of your kids rode the bus and that was the 10th pick-up of the day, now you just had to wait for the twin's foster mother.

The cool wind of the November day cresses your body and causes you to shiver. You might have lived in San Diego, but that didn’t stop the recent set of lower-than-75-degree days you had been having. A sudden grip on your pant leg is followed by what you could only describe as a mini human heater and as you glance down your eyes meet a pair of icy blue ones belonging to one-half of the twins.

“Hi Gray, where’s sissy?” Your hand gently strokes through his sandy blonde hair, to push back the stray pieces that fall over his forehead.

“Laine went back inside. She was cold and I told her that she couldn’t go whifout you, but she not listen.”

A small shutter racks through his chest, and you have to hold your tongue when you see his evident lack of a jacket. Their foster parents weren’t exactly your favorite people, and you had learned firsthand that they were only keeping the twins for the cheque at the end of each month.

It was at the beginning of the school year, not even the second week in and you noticed immediately that the twins were only rotating through 3 sets of clothes. You had gone to visit Mrs. Adam’s, the school's Head Teacher, and she had explained the situation.

It was their 12th foster home in the last 5 years, and while you found them to be perfect little angels, sometimes crazy, but still angels others did not. You had tried to reach out to their foster parents, but after a phone call that ended in you crying, you didn’t bother with them anymore. You had tried to leave it alone; it wasn’t your place to pry, and you knew that the kids were physically safe.

That answer came from Madelaine, she was a talkative five-year-old that honestly reminded you of Jake, and most days she would chat with you about different things she had learned, mostly in concern to the ocean and its sea life. Though one day, out of nowhere she had come to sit with you and Grayson on the playground bench during recess and told you, “He likes you cause you are nice and warm. Plus, you don’t push us like Mr. Meanie's face did.” It had stunned you for a moment, while Laine wasn’t affected by the words, little Gray had gone ridged at your side and clasped onto your hand. You had questioned her and found out that it was one of the other 12 foster homes. You didn’t push for specifics, not wanting to upset either of them, though Laine had told you that they only got in trouble when Gray did something wrong.

“He doesn’t mean to. Sometimes his eyeballs just go funny.”

Your gaze moved between the two of them, a questioning look on your face, before asking Gray to explain. That was how you had figured out he needed glasses, lucky the school provided testing, and not even two days after the test, you had him in a little pair of wire-framed glasses. You had him pick them out the day he had the testing, and without a second thought, you bought them.

You buying them things had become a regular occurrence. While the kids didn’t know it was you giving them clothes, Mrs. Adams made sure that they had whatever you gave her. Though now looking at Grayson you curse yourself for not thinking of “winter” coats before and mentally add it to the list to pick up when you and Jake are next at the mall.

“Come on my darling, let’s go find Miss Madelaine.”

Gray unwinds from your tan pant leg, before grasping your hand and tugging you forward. You glance behind you, up and down the road to check if their car is anywhere in sight, and find an empty street. You and Grayson make your way back into the school, stopping to ask Ms. Reynolds to call their foster parents, before heading down to your classroom.

“Did you know when a plane goes like this,” The hand not holding yours reached up and turns over, with his palm facing up. “it’s called in– inverturd”

You glance down at the little boy as he slightly adjusts the glasses on his face while waiting for your reply.

“Inverted, Gray. With an ‘e’”

You found out recently that while at home the kids either watched tv or played on a shared tablet, from an anonymous individual this last month. The twins weren’t allowed to go outside, and the pair barely had any toys, which left them to learn all sorts of things.

You learned early on in the school year that the Gray loved planes and watched an array of war movies. While Laine loved the ocean and watched the discovery channel quite religiously. The fact that they were watching movies and shows not explicitly meant for children had your gut twisting, but they had told you that the house didn’t have children’s channels. So, the next best option was military films and shark week, Laine’s favorite. That had come directly from Laine after she explained that they were learning at least unlike other kids, she was the bona fide sassy one of the pair.

Your classroom comes into view, the fall-decorated door stands ajar and Madelaine sits at your desk eating a pack of gummies. She has both hers and Gray's backpacks sitting on the floor, while she hums along to the music coming from the Alexa on your desk.

“Good job bringing Ms. CeeCee, Gray.” You glance down at the small boy still grasping your hand, his eyes remain on his sister though a big smile spreads across his face. Laine wiggles another bag of gummies at Gray, and he drops your hand, quick to grab the snack from his sister.

“Miss Laine, what do you think you’re doing in here?” You try to appear stern though a smile breaks across your face as she gives you a toothless grin. Her middle bottom tooth had fallen out just last week, and it made her smile all the more cute.

“I was cold, and Janice wasn’t coming anyway. She never does.” The small grimace she gives you makes your heartache.

“I know, but I’m here and we can do some crafts while waiting. Ms. Reynolds in the office is trying to call her.”

…

You glance up at the clock and see that it's nearing 5 pm. You glance back to the twins and find Grayson meticulously gluing things to his paper in a pattern. While Madelaine has used every color of feather you have, on a crown that now rests on her head. You didn’t mind staying after with the kids, what was frustrating was the lack of care that their “parent” was displaying.

“I’m just going to go see if Ms. Reynolds has heard anything, you two be good while I’m gone.”

Gray only nods in reply as his tongue peeks out between his lips in concentration. Laine gives you a cheeky smile, followed by a ‘mkay.’ Your shoes click against the tile floors, and you wave to Mrs. Rogers, the 5th-grade teacher, that’s shutting off lights for the night.

The office isn’t far from your room, and you find a frustrated Mrs. Adams that’s sitting and talking with Ms. Reynolds. They glance at you at the sound of you knocking on the door frame, and you already know the answer.

…

Jake had gotten off a little early, the team had run drills all morning and then Jake was stuck doing paperwork. He was more than happy when he finished that last of the paperwork at 4:30 and decided to leave early.

He slips in the truck, though before he can head out there’s a knock against his window. Jake glances over, before rolling down the window for Mav. Jake had been surprised when he got called back for the Dagger Squad and even more surprised to find out that his father-in-law was in charge. You had been married for just over a year when Jake got called back to Top Gun and you both couldn’t have been happier to come back.

“Have you talked to Y/n yet?”

The older man sighs while leaning up against the truck, he grabs the ball cap from his head while running his hand through his hair. He was clearly stressed about something, and it had to have occurred in the last 4 hours because Maverick had been perfectly fine this morning.

“No, I was just about to call her about dinner. What’s up?” Jake questions slightly confused.

“She must be ignoring Lanell. The woman’s called me twice today, wanting to know about the last round of treatment.”

A harsh sigh leaves Jake at the mention of your mother. Lanell was an interesting woman, to say the least, and your relationship was almost nonexistent. She had a habit of putting you down, and during the last treatment, she had said some unforgivable things about your lacking ability.

“Y/n blocked her and she’s lucky that’s all that happened.”

Mav’s brow furors slightly in question and leans farther into Jake’s truck.

“Lanell told Y/n that unless she got pregnant, she was a failure as a woman.” Jake’s head slightly shakes, still astounded by what your mother had said. “I don’t hit women, but by God, I wanted to lay her out.”

Mav slowly blinks at Jake, before dropping his head and pinching the bridge of his nose. A harsh laugh falls from the man, followed by a deep breath before he’s looking back at a less-than-happy Jake.

“Every time she calls me, I regret having a child with her. Why couldn’t I have just been smart from the beginning and had Y/n with Penny.”

Another laugh falls from Jake, as he shakes his head in agreement. With a nod, Mav is pushing off Jake’s door and tells him that he will handle your mother.

The drive home isn’t long, and the chill of the day is crisp and exactly the type of weather Jake loved. Living in California didn’t exactly mean that there was a fall and having days like these made Jake miss the cool weather.

Pulling into your drive, Jake notices your missing car and reaches for his phone to call you. Even when Jake got off early, if it was after 4:30 you were usually home before him. There had been times in the past, but they were few and far between.

…

The buzzing causes the whole table to shake and has both of the kids looking up from their current art projects. Their eyes bounce from the phone and back to one another. Madelaine is reaching for it before Grayson can stop her, as a teasing smile followed by a giggle erupts from her.

“You shouldn’t touch Ms. CeeCee’s phone, that’s not nice.”

“It’s not nice to ignore phone call’s either.”

Gray falls silent at the comment, before glaring at his sister and going back to his beads. Laine does a small dance in her chair in victory, before pushing the green answer button.

“Hello.”

“Ummm, Hi”

“Who’s this.”

Grayson glances back at his sister and then to the door, in hopes that you’ll show up and take the phone from Laine. He didn’t want to get in trouble and would be completely fine with letting his sister take the fall for this.

“I’m Jake, where is Mrs. Seresin?”

“I’m Madelaine. Ms. CeeCee went to the office, but you can talk to me.”

A laugh echoes through the phone and a wide grin breaks across Laine’s face. Gray looks up when he hears the quiet laugh and finds his sissy with her tongue out at him. His own tongue pokes out at her before he gets up to move closer to the phone. Laine notices Gray’s sudden interest and brings the phone down to set it on the tabletop. The twins silently look at the phone’s call screen before Gray finds the speaker button and Jake’s voice echoes through the room.

“Mr. Jake, my bubba is here too. Gray, say hi.” She nudges at the boy’s shoulder, who only looks at her before shaking his head. “It’s not nice to ignore people Gray. How would you feel if Mr. Jake ignored us?”

A smile breaks across Jake’s face at the young girl, though makes sure he doesn’t laugh and waits for Grayson to speak.

“Hi.” His voice is small and it’s only a little peep from him, but Jake’s heart aches at the sound of the pair together.

Before Jake can say anything else, he hears a high-pitched squeal followed by your laughter and the shuffle of the phone.

“Darlin?”

His voice is still on loudspeaker, the echo gives it away and his question is followed by two separate voices saying ‘yes?’ One is clearly your voice, while the other is undeniably the cheeky little spitfire that had been holding a full conversation with him. A full laugh falls from Jake and he can’t help but smile at how adorable both kids were, even if Grayson didn’t talk much. Jake just knew the pair of them were adorable, trouble, but adorable.

“Not the little darlin’, Ms. CeeCee Darlin’.”

…

You can hear the giggling of the pair before you even reach the door of your classroom, though you hadn’t expected to hear Jake’s voice ringing through the classroom. You walk in trying to be as quiet as possible, not wanting to interrupt the twins. Their art projects sit abandoned, while Laine sits up on her knees in a chair, leaning over your phone with the biggest smile on her face. Gray stands at her side, leaning against the table but looking between the phone and Laine before a small ‘hi’ is mumbled from his lips.

They are completely consumed with the conversation with Jake, which gives you the perfect distraction, so you can sneak up on them. You slowly walk across the room, making sure to avoid anything that would make noise. As you get next to them you almost laugh at how consumed they are, though you're quick to reach out and tickle them both on their sides. Gray only jumps as a small squeak is released, while Laine jumps full-on and releases a scream. Both kids spin around, their own hands coming out to tickle at you now and making you laugh.

Jake’s laugh is followed by him calling for you, though you weren’t prepared for Madelaine to answer as well. Gray silently laughs at your hip, while Laine wears a shameless smile that only grows when you shake your head. Your hand tracks through her long dirty blonde hair, it was a few shades darker than Grayson’s, though their eyes were the exact same shade of blue. You take the phone from the table and gently tell the kids to begin putting their crafts away, while you talk with Mr. Jake.

“Hi, honey.”

“Hey, darlin’. You got the phone back from the twin terrors?”

His voice is teasing, and you can’t help the smile that crosses your lips as you watch them clean up. You listen to Jake and hum in answer to his question about dinner, though your main focus stays on the twins as they work in tandem perfectly together. You agree to pick up something on the way home, and that you shouldn’t be too late.

“Darlin’ did you hear me?”

The words pull your attention back to the phone call that you were still on.

“I’m sorry honey, I was just watching the twins clean up and get ready to go.” Your voice is soft and holds a longing that makes your and Jake’s hearts ache.

“They stayed late today, is everything okay?”

Jake knew bits about their story, though you tried hard not to bring your work home with you. The both of you already had so much going on that consumed your thoughts daily, that worrying about the twins more than you already did, would lead to disaster.

“Yeah, I will explain when I get home. I’m going to get them ready to go though, I love you.”

“I love you, darlin’. Drive safe, I’ll see you soon.”

You take a deep breath as you hang up, clearing your mind of the silent longing that the wish the twins were yours. That they were going home with you to Jake, in a warm loving home that always put them first. Though the thought only creates room for heartbreak and so you push it to the back of your mind as you get ready to leave.

…

You watch as Janice gets the twins in the car, though she doesn’t bother with helping them buckle, and a deep anger blooms in your chest. Though it’s eased as you see both kids get the latches in place, and a smile crosses your face when they wave to you with small smiles.

Your smile stays in place until the car disappears down the street, then it falls, and you wrap your arms around yourself as you make your way to your car. The cool air plays no part in how your heart clenches and the small squeeze you give yourself before getting in the car to head home.

The drive home was fast, given that it was late enough that the rush had already passed. The stop at the Italian place was even quicker and luckily easy, given that Jake had called your order in and you just had to pick it up. Your hip pushes against the car door causing it to close, as you hold the takeout in one hand and your school bag in the other.

A small smile graces your lips as you see the front door open, and Jake already has his hand out to take part in your load. He is quick to grab the steaming Italian food, but you reach up and pull him into a sweet kiss before he can pull away. The food and school bag sit in your hands completely forgotten, as Jake places a kiss on the top of your head as you rest against his chest.

He gives your hip a tiny squeeze before he pulls away to lead you into the kitchen. You drop your bag in the hall and kick off your shoes before following Jake. He’s already got the table set and you place a kiss on his cheek in thanks, as he places the different containers from the Italian place out.

The slow tune of Bing Crosby floats through the kitchen and you smile as Jake slowly hums along to the track. You skirt around each other, and after five years of marriage, you know each other like the back of your hand and work flawlessly together. A laugh falls from your lips as Jake’s arms wrap around your waist and turn you in his arms to dance along to the old vinyl.

“How’s my best girl doing?”

The words are spoken against your hair, and you hum as he spins you out, before bringing you back in his arms.

“I’m good.” Your words ring out though there’s a hitch in your words that has Jake waiting for you to continue while he sways you. “I just don’t understand. They don’t care about them; how can you just forget about picking up your children.” A small sniffle comes from you that has Jake pulling you back, and as his hand settles on your cheek your lips twist in annoyance. “She didn’t even check to make sure they were buckled.”

Tears gather in your eyes as Jake’s lips brush against your brow, and you can’t stop them as they start falling. His hand tracks across your face and sweeps the hair from your eyes to tuck it gently behind your ear. He watches you in silence, with a frown marring his face at the words.

Jake knew how much having a child meant to you, it meant just as much to him, but seeing you so heartbroken over it was almost worse than the actual fact. You had mentioned the twins to Jake before, though you never went fully in-depth. Even without you telling him every small detail concerning their life, Jake knew how much they meant to you.

Hell, Jake knew that you had started buying them clothes, after finding a bag marked ‘twins’ in your car. After that, he may or may not, have gone out and got them a few things. Including the tablet that they so dearly loved. Jake had given the pile of items to Mrs. Adams one day and asked her not to tell you. The elderly woman only smiled at him and gave him a wink, before taking the items. Jake didn’t even know the children and yet he felt a connection with them. Having the call today only confirmed that they were absolutely perfect, hell raisers, but perfect.

You shuffle in Jake's hold and brush the stray tears from your face, while you lean back against the counter. You pull Jake with you and wrap your arms around his waist easily, silently toying with the band of his sweatpants.

“How is it fair that they get to have children and they don’t even care. Meanwhile, we try and try, and it never happens.” Another broken sob, “I would love them so much. I do love them so much, but they aren’t ours and they’re never going to be ours.”

The final words are no more than a whisper from your lips, but Jake hears them perfectly. The food on the table is easily forgotten as Jake pulls your whimpering form into his hold, in the only way that he knows how to comfort you. It wasn’t a problem that Jake could just fix and the harsh truth, that only time would tell, was not something he would ever get used to.

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mrswolffs-blog · 9 months

Text

The Best Kept Secret: Lewis Hamilton x Black!Reader

The night was dark and a bit chilly as Lewis sat down outside at the side of his home, the only source of light was from a light bulb on his left that allowed the fans to partially see him.

He had been going back and forth answering questions as taking interest in the suggestions that they gave him when out of nowhere, a high pitched scream was heard. “What on earth is this snake doing out here Lewis?!” A female could be heard in the background as her footsteps approached him. This caused the chat to spiral off into chaos as the fans were unable to recognise the voice which led them to the knowledge that it wasn’t a family member.

Lewis smiled as he watched his wife approach with a boob hanging from one of her bra cups with a fussy infant in one hand while the other hand was occupied by a sleepy toddler. He kept the camera on himself as he listened to what was being said. “Lew can you please hold Milo so I can finish Leah’s routine? I’ll come get him once I’m done” she asked as Lewis held his reaches his arm out for his son to take. “Of course, you go inside and we’ll come in when I’m finished. You don’t have to come for him” Lewis countered as Milo climbed into his lap and cuddled into his chest.

Y/n went back inside with the infant as Lewis returned his attention back to his son. “Are you comfortable Lo?” He asked as his son murmured a response. “Yes daddy” the boy answered as he drifted off. Reading through the comments, Lewis realized that the fans now knew his biggest secret, yet he wasn’t fazed. “Oh yeah, I should’ve mentioned that I now have a family. I am married and have been for the past five years. I have three kids: Roscoe Hamilton, Milo Hamilton, he’s three years old and as you can see he has fallen asleep and my infant daughter Leah Hamilton, she’s two months old- she’s inside with her mommy. My wife is Y/n Hamilton and she’s twenty-six years old. She’s a nurse”. Lewis informed his fans of the updates in his life.

By now the entire world has gotten the news and everyone was freaking out. From girls who were waiting for a chance with him being disappointed to the other celebrities who were friends with him that never even heard of him dating. The world was suddenly spinning for everyone as they tried to figure out how a heavily paparazzied man was able to keep this big secret for so long. After another half another had passed, Lewis said good night to his fans, leaving them with a positive message as always before ending his live to attend to his beautiful family, while ignoring the continuous buzz of the news outlets and social media apps.

#lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton x oc

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mirkwoodshewolf · 1 year

Text

Best support friend; Rocket raccoon x gn reader

*Author’s note*

A double update? No get out of town! Truthfully I was gonna save posting this fic up once I got a Jack Kline request that has been sitting in my inbox collecting dust for almost a year or however long ago it was but I decided idk when I’ll post it up so I decided to just go ahead and post this fic up and hopefully I’ll do the Jack Kline one in the next week or so (it’s like 75% done).

So @itsscromp here is your new Rocket raccoon request.

Warnings: abuse, fluff, panic attacks, angst, protective Rocket, swearing, clueless ravagers.

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@waddles03

@psychosupernatural

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@queen-paladin

@queensdivas

@gay-and-ready-to-cry

@austynparksandpizza

___________________________________________________________

“NONE OF THIS WOULD’VE HAPPENED IF YOU HAD JUST LET ME TAKE THE REINS FOR ONCE!!” exclaimed a voice.

“Well excuse me for not letting the man with the robotic eyes take the wheel.” Another voice snarked sarcastically. I was passing through Knowhere trying to organize some supplies when I heard the sound of arguing. I followed the voices and there were Ezekiel and Torath.

“Oh no what now?” I muttered as I walked towards them. The two of them continued to argue as I spoke up. “Hey guys.”

“You have any idea what that shrimp Quill is gonna do to us the minute we tell you lost the cargo?” Torath said.

“I lost the cargo? Need I remind you that it was because of your glitchy eyes that you hit the ejector button sending the cargo out into the depths of space!” Ezekiel snapped again at Torath.

“And need I remind you that you are literally the worst pilot in the entire galaxy! I’ve seen beasts with half a brain fly advance ships better than you!”

“Okay guys can we please just….” I tried to cease the argument but the two stubborn, pig-headed men got into a squabble. Fists were flying and swears were spat out. “hey! Hey! Hey! Hey guys stop it! Stop it! Stop it!” suddenly I caught an elbow to the nose which not only sent me to the ground but also in a flashback.

~Flashback~

I fell to the ground as a punch came across my face and I whimpered as I spat out blood.

“Quit being weak Terran! How will you ever grow a backbone if you keep behaving like a sniveling coward!”

“But sir it—” I was kicked in the stomach this time and I let out a soft but painful grunt.

“You tell me it hurts and I swear I will make your next test more painful than the last!” I whimpered and gave him a nod as he forced me to stand back up and told me to stand my ground as he kept punching and kicking me.

~End of flashback~

My chest tightened and my heart pounded against my ears. No I-I wasn’t there! I wasn’t there anymore! I-I have to get out of here! I stood up and took off running as fast as I could. Even when I had ran into someone I didn’t stop, all I knew was that I had to get out of there.

*Rocket’s POV*

I felt someone shove pass me but just before I could snap at them telling them to watch where they were going, I saw the familiar shape of (Y/n). Normally they don’t just run like that unless there’s something wrong or their in a hurry. And they’re usually not in a hurry.

That’s when I heard the sound of Torath and Ezekiel screaming and rolling all over each other in a brawl. I went over to them and called out to them.

“OI SHITS FOR BRAINS!!” but not even my voice could deter them from arguing. I nodded nonchalantly as I took out my electro-shocker gun and activated it. I first aimed it at Ezekiel and fired one shot before firing at Torath. And just like when Groot, (Y/n) and I first hunted down Quill, they both exclaimed as the electro-shock balls stuck to them and they were given a good shock. “Have I got your attention now shitbags?”

“What was that for rodent?” snapped Ezekiel.

“First of all don’t call me a rodent, not when I can give you a second dosage of shocks. Maybe this time I’ll crank it up a notch.” That got him to shut up. “Second of all, why was (Y/n) racing out from your general direction looking upset?”

“(Y/n) was here?” Torath asked as his robotic eyes moved around.

“Yeah she was now answer my question nimrods! What happened?!”

“I didn’t even know that she had even came here.” I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

“How do you not notice them? They’re the only Terran besides Quill!”

“Wait, is that why my elbow hurts so much?” asked Ezekiel. My ears twitched and I slowly turned towards him, my tail twitching in anger.

“What. Was that. You said?!” I sneered lowly.

“In our squabble, I—I felt my elbow hit something but I—” I didn’t even let him finish as I launched at him and proceeded to beat the shit out of him. Blinded by pure rage.

How dare this son of a bitch hit (Y/n)! She had to live her entire life abused and tortured just to prove that she could enhance her skin into a hard-carbon shield. Had it not been for Groot and I, she would’ve had to spend the rest of her miserable life with that sick, cowardly bastard.

I was deep in my rage that I hadn’t even felt myself being pulled forced away from Ezekiel and Quill’s voice exclaimed.

“Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa Rocket cool it man! Now I don’t know what the hell brought this on but you need to chill out right now!”

“This spineless rat hurt (Y/n)!” I yelled.

“I didn’t know they were even here! We didn’t know they were there!” Ezekiel tried to reason as Torath helped him up.

“With the way you two were bitching at each other you couldn’t see your own noses at the end of your faces!” I managed to wriggle my way out of Quill’s hold and without another word raced off to find (Y/n).

Being reminded of any form of abuse whether it’s done to themselves or they see if, they get triggered by it and let me tell you it gets bad. So bad that they sometimes forget where they are or whose friend of foe. All they see is that damned doctor.

I was asking around hoping that anyone had seen them but they all proved to be a bunch of negligent losers. That was until Mantis had said that she felt their emotions coming from my ship. I raced back to the Milano and soon enough in the main cockpit I found them huddled up, their chest rising up and down at an erratic pace.

I could also hear just how bad their heart was racing and could smell the panicked sweat from not only their brow but also their clammy hands. I walked towards them but didn’t speak, at this point they wouldn’t be able to hear me. But there was one way to pull them out of this…..and Quill or Drax better not be spying on me otherwise I’ll blast them halfway across the quadrant.

I sat as close as I could beside them and first gave their bicep a gentle and affectionate nuzzle. I then placed my paw onto their forearm and using my claws I very gently stroked down the skin of their forearm. Then going back up to the same place where I started before going back down again.

“C’mon (N/n). Come back to me. You can do this.” I muttered before their breathing slowed and they seemed to be coming back down to reality.

*My POV*

It had been forever since I had a panic attack. If I didn’t know what they were, I swear I thought I was dying. My vision was so blurry, I couldn’t even see my own hand in front of my face. There was this high-pitch ringing that was constantly piercing my ears and my body felt paralyzed after I had collapsed into god knows where.

That’s when I felt something furry against my arm. I also felt sharp nails (or claws) gently stroke down my arm. They didn’t hurt but they did send tingles up from my arm to my spine. Slowly the claws kept stroking down my forearm until I lifted it up and found my hand being placed on something soft.

I opened my eyes and after blinking away some of the tears as well as the haze that my vision was making, it began to focus and there I saw Rocket sitting right beside me. His ears slightly bent backward as his eyes were looking at me assuringly and I also saw that my hand was now resting just on top of his head.

He gave me a soft nod and allowed me to stroke through his fur (knowing that it helped calm me down in the past). After petting his head for a few minutes, I was able to unfold my legs from my chest so that they now were fully extended in front of me and I felt the tingling sensation of them falling asleep.

Rocket then rested his upperbody on top of my right thigh and allowed me to continue stroking his fur until I felt a vibration on my thigh. I looked down and as I stroked down Rocket’s neck, I could feel him purring, like actually purring. I didn’t even know he could purr (kinda made me think back to the cats back on Earth).

“I….didn’t know you could purr like a cat.”

“This is a once in a lifetime thing. You speak of this to anyone, especially that stupid mutt Cosmo, I’ll rip your head off.”

“Thank you Rocket. This……means a lot.”

“Been a long time since you had one, figured you’d need something to help calm you down.” Rocket can be gruff and hard on the outside but when he wants to, if you look deep, deep, deep, deep down inside, you’ll find that he’s just a sweet, caring, intuitive creature who will do anything to help you out.

Even if it’s purring like a cat and having someone pet you constantly until they feel centered again. But I wouldn’t have my best friend any other way.

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strxbrymochi · 2 months

Text

melting an ice heart | lmk

08. id card

masterlist • previous • next

pairing: lee mark (nct) x fem!reader

genre & tropes: smau, mostly enemies to lovers but a little bit of fluff too don’t worry, sports au (hockey player x figure skater), grumpy x sunshine energy, chaotic friend energy

chapter warnings: swearing, a lil glimpse into what she dealt with as a child, but i don't think it's too deep, just mentions of abuse but indirectly

synopsis: he’s the life of every party, the team heartthrob and mvp while she’s the stone cold ice-princess who will stop at nothing to get things her way. but when an accident intertwines the two more than they had hoped, will his fire be enough to melt the ice facade she’s built up or will they continue to clash and end up in ruins?

updates: mwf 8:00pm gmt+8 // 11:00pm gmt+11

taglist: open!

words: ~1.2k

"fuck." you curse out loud as you hit your fist on the ice. you've been here for around 2 hours now, your training ended at 9pm and here you are again, at 2am, skating, in a supposedly closed rink.

you've been coming in after hours for about a couple years now, well since you started at suwon at least. your parents had said they paid off time for you to skate anytime you wanted, and so you did. at first it seemed as though they never wanted you to rest-- not that you were complaining, but over time you saw of it as your safe space. the rink was more a home to you than your actual house. it was your solace everytime something went wrong. it was where all your pent up anger and stress was released on to. your emotions displayed through the way your skates glide smoothly, but aggressively, in the ice. as you stand back up and skate around to shake it off and try your routine again, memories of your childhood flood your brain.

"again." your mother would shout at you from the bleachers.

back when you were younger and skated near home, your parents made it a point to watch you at every training. refusing to let you go home until they thought your run was spotless.

your mom is a skater too, so she understood what it was like. well, was a skater. she wouldn't really tell you the details other than the fact she says she pushes you to experience the things she never got to. as a good daughter, you followed through, no questions asked.

you stand up from the fall, and brush your hands off your leggings. it felt sticky, and something stung. you look down on your hands to see scratches and a bit of blood from your now 12th fall in the last hour and a half. you pull your jacket sleeve over to cover it up and silently wince in pain. you move back to position and make eye contact with your coach, standing next to your mom. she nods at you. "come on now, we haven't got all day have we?" your mom shouts, arms crossing.

you take a deep breath and try again, you gain speed and you leap. you spin once, twice, thrice, and extend your leg to land, and you do. only it was too late and you tip over to the edge and fall; hearing a small snap.

"for goodness sakes, i did not go through all that to raise a FAILURE." your mother shouts. "stop being dramatic and get up. again."

you look over to your knee which gave way in that landing. you stretch it to test how bad the pain was. wincing, you do your best to stand up.

"maybe we should stop for today..." your coach tells your mom cautiously.

"she'll stop when she gets it right." your mom snaps back. "do you hear me y/n? we aren't leaving here til you get that jump right."

and so with another deep breath, you try to forget the pain on your knee and try again. hoping, praying, that's the last time.

you get home after practice and your mother immediately sends you to your room with no dinner. your mom believes in meal times and anything after 9pm was a big no for the digestive system, makes you gain weight apparently. so here you are, sitting in your chair, trying to do your homework, on an empty stomach because you got home at 10:30pm. all because you couldn't get a jump right. you glance at your foot, red seeping through the bandages from the cuts from your skates. you sigh. this was going to be a long night.

the lights in the rink suddenly turn on. what the fuck? no one has ever come in the rink at this time of night except you. cleaners maybe? no, they would be asleep. no one knew of your parents arrangement and if anyone were to find out you'd be in serious trouble.

you hear footsteps. shit. you skate your way to the entrance and quickly put on your skate guards, grab your training bag and run out. you had no time to change your shoes. as you run out, you hide behind the building, breathing silently, making sure no one caught you. as you reach down your training bag you freeze. your id card. you close your eyes and curse silently. it must've fallen out as you were running. you couldn't go back in, not when you didn't know who was in there. you'd just have to hope they don't find it and you can get it tomorrow.

you quickly change your skates for shoes and run off into the night before anyone else catches you.

back in the rink, mark makes his way to the entrance. huh, why are there skate marks? he was certain they cleaned off the ice after the last practice. come to think about it, he did hear glides as he entered the rink. didn't sound like a hockey skate, maybe a figure skater? he'd probably ask his uncle tomorrow.

as mark laces up his boots and gets into the ice, he moves around. just in a circle, letting the wind hit his face and calm him down. he was on the ice for as long as he could remember. it was his mother who introduced it to him, and it was his distraction when she got sick. lucky for him his family owned a rink, so it seemed only right he'd pursue it. now that he moved to suwon, his uncle allowed him unlimited access, now he can skate whenever he needed to, if he wanted to clear his head or if he just needed a break. and that's what he was doing tonight. the move wasn't exactly easy, but he's been adjusting well. he has friends, he's well-liked, hockey's doing good, but it's different. well, maybe it's because his mom isn't here for any of it.

"mom? you there?" he calls out as he skates around. he probably sounds stupid but his mom always told him she would always be watching over him, every single time he touched the ice. "it's been a while, the move's been crazy, i haven't really been able to skate freely like this but thankfully samchun's been great about letting me do now, so hopefully i'll get to talk to you more. anyways, i had my first game the other day and we won." he says. "i got mvp, pretty neat. school's been good, classes aren't as hard and i have friends. i think you'd really like them." he continues to tell her how he's been going, letting the way the air hits him serve as a sign she's listening.

he finishes his run and skates over to the bleachers to change his shoes. as he walks to the exit he hears a crunch. looking down, he sees an id card. weird. he thinks, bending over to pick it up.

huh. he thinks, flipping it over. y/n l/n, he says to himself, the girl he bumped into at reverie. now he had some sort of leverage to find out more about her but wait, what was the ice princess doing in the rink this time of night? was it really you he almost caught? questions circled his mind. only one way to find out he thinks, holding your id card as he makes his way out.

💌; @leefullsun @defzcl @ncityzenz @keemburley @syzavxy @doejaejung @softieluvsyou @leep0ems @nae-vm @hizhu @haechanielove @chezziy @excalibur-gone-missing @bluedbliss @girlwholoveslpreppyattire @planetkiimchi @swimmingismywholelife @cloudmrk @clean-soap @prettyrenjunn @yyangj3lly @kittydollzz @seunghancore @aerivrs @thisisnotjacinta

#nct dream scenarios #nct dream fluff #nct dream social media au #nct dream fic #mark lee smau #mark lee enemies to lovers #melting an ice heart smau #stxbrymochi maih #nct fic #mark lee fic #mark lee hockey au #nct hockey au #nct sports au #mark x reader #mark lee x reader

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matan4il · 5 months

Note

Kibbutz menara in the north has been half demolished by hezbollah

Nonnie, I hope it's okay to add to this ask, another one on the same subject, kibbutz Menara:

Can you write about the huge damage to kibbutz menara in your next update post? Tysm for them

And just in case both are from you, I'm so sorry I hadn't posted about this before, I did think of adding it to one of my daily update posts, but then I thought this deserves a post of its own, so I hope this ask reply dedicated to the subject will do it some justice.

(also, thank you for the kind words about my daily update posts! That means so, so very much! *hearts*)

Hezbollah has been targeting civilian communities along Israel's northern border. Kibbutz Menara is situated incredibly close to the border. I heard one journalist, who described the distance as, "There's the border fence, a narrow road running along it, and on the road's other side, the kibbutz fence," but looking up Menara on the map, sometimes it's not even that. Here's the map:

The kibbutz is also high up the mountain, making it very easy for Hezbollah to target this community, and very difficult for Israeli forces to defend. This image can give you an idea of what we're talking about:

I heard on the news that when fire broke out at one point, firefighters couldn't even approach the kibbutz, because Hezbollah's rockets made it too dangerous, and they just had to sit back, and watch the fire rage uncontrolled.

On Dec 24, Orly Yitzchak, a senior member of the kibbutz, said that 86 out of 155 apartments at Menara have been damaged, so we're talking about over half of the homes in this community at that point. And that's about two weeks ago, when Hezbollah's terrorist activity on Israel's border has only increased since.

Just to give everyone some context regarding this kibbutz... It was founded in 1943, as a community for Jewish youths from Germany and Poland, meaning young Holocaust survivors. The land for it was purchased a short while before the kibbutz was established. The conditions were very rough at first, for example supplies had to be brought there on mules, and at the beginning, the kibbutz members slept in tents and caves. A proper road was only completed in 1947. The first water pipe took longer, it was only inaugurated in 1953. During Israel's Independence War, the kibbutz was besieged from March to May 1948, and food had to be smuggled in at night, while some of the younger kids had to be secretly smuggled out (if you read the novel Exodus or watched its movie version, there's a fictional account of this real event). The kibbutz continued to be under attack even after the end of the war, including its water pipe being blown up in 1965, and community members being murdered along the years.

That's some of what the elders of the kibbutz had been through, the same people who now, at their old age, are forced to evacuate their community, live as refugees in their own country, and no one knows yet if they'll have any homes to return to. Roni, one kibbutz member, said in an interview that it's the community's elders who are strengthening the rest, and asking the younger generation to return to it no matter what.

There aren't a lot of photos taken there since the start of the war, but here are a few, just to give you an idea... The first pic is taken out of a family's living room.

I hope this does the kibbutz some justice. My heart goes out to the community's members. Thank you for caring about them, Nonnie! I hope you're well, and taking care of yourself! Sending you lots and lots of love. xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

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bungalowbear · 2 months

Text

Across the Stars X

Pairing: Hunter x Jedi!reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: It’s time for you and the children to flee Ibaar, but an unexpected and deadly adversary makes an appearance.

Warnings: action/fighting, mention of death and blood and a body being cut in half, major character death

A/N: It’s been almost a full year since I last updated this story. So sorry for the long wait! I struggled a lot with motivation for this series but the recent season has lit a fire under me. I’m excited to share this with you and what more I have in store. Let me know what you think, or come to my ask box to discuss the show! I’d love to hear from you :)

Series Masterlist

Staying on Ibaar for this long was always a risk. You knew this, and yet it turns out even you aren’t immune to the temptation of normalcy, a coveted comfort promising a respite from your troubles. And now, your weakness might prove to be your and the children’s doom.

You and Tara race across the dirt and back home. Ushering her in first, you look over your shoulder before the door slides closed with a swift thud. The others scramble away from the window and crowd around you.

“What’s happening?” Lyra questions, looking up at you with worry painted across her face.

“It’s the Empire,” Petro says. His expression is even, but you can see the panic in his youthful eyes. “How did they find us?”

“Yes, the Empire is here.” Speaking slowly, you look at each of them before you continue. “But not for us. We know they’ve occupied other planets, and unfortunately, Ibaar is next.”

Gungi chimes in, asking what happens now.

“We’re leaving.” All four voices protest as soon as the words pass your lips. They talk all at once, lamenting their established lives on this planet. It pains you to take this away. You shouldn’t have given it to them in the first place. You silence them with the clearing of your throat. “This isn’t up for discussion. We’ve been here too long, and staying any longer will only put us in unnecessary danger.”

“We can’t just leave these people to be taken over by the Empire,” Tara objects. “They’ll be pushed around and exploited just like on Saleucami.”

You frown, shaking your head. “We can’t help them, Tara.”

“But—”

“You are a child.” The word forces itself out of you, stressed by her actions against the troopers. Tara’s eyes widen before she turns away from you. You sigh, addressing the other three as well. “You are children first, Jedi second. Do you understand?”

Petro, Gungi, and Lyra nod their heads solemnly. Tara still doesn’t face you, but the drop of her shoulders tells you she accepts your words.

“There is nothing of greater importance to me than making sure you all live long, long lives.” You open your arms and three bodies step into your embrace. Lyra tugs on Tara’s sleeve until she eventually joins. You stretch your arms as wide as they will go and hold the younglings close. “Yes, we help others when we can. But this is not one of those times. We’ll leave for the mountain just before first light.”

You tell the children to pack a bag and that you’ll check on them before it’s time to sleep. They’re quiet as they trudge toward their respective rooms, a few sniffles interrupting the silence.

After you tuck the children in one last time, you station yourself in the living room. Sleep doesn’t come for you, so instead you keep watch through the window. The house, the street, the whole town, is suffocated with a deadly tension. Once again, you sense the impending approach of an obscure force. Your mind’s cloudiness has improved, the shadow of the dark side slowly withdrawing from your psyche, but it’s still left you with a numbness you have yet to break out of. Your visions are not to be trusted yet. Not even worth considering. Not when the lives of four children hang in the balance.

Your heart aches for them. They are too young to have to endure what they have, but it’s also their very youth that helps you face another rising sun. Petro’s confidence, Gungi’s loyalty, Lyra’s gentleness, and Tara’s compassion remind you each day that there is still light and hope in this galaxy.

No one knows how long this dangerous time will last for the Jedi, but you swear to yourself you will do all you can to protect their light. It doesn’t burn as radiantly as it did before, dimmed by the circumstances it finds itself in, but you’re glad you could foster it even if for a short time here on Ibaar. You cling to the hope that someday it can shine freely once again.

The sun has yet to rise when you feel a shift. Someone very dangerous to the Jedi has landed on Ibaar. It’s dark and menacing. It’s searching.

You wake the children and help them gather their things. You raise a finger to your mouth, pressing your hand to the panel beside the door to open it. You step outside and make sure the coast is clear. Then, you signal for the children to follow after you. Quiet, careful steps make their way across the dirt into a narrow alley. Your small group sticks closely together, only the rustle of your canvas knapsacks make noise as they gently brush against your cloaks.

When you reach the far end of the street you hear the commotion. It’s coming from behind, from the direction of your home, and you realize you’ve been found out. You don’t know how but it’s not what’s most important in this moment.

“Hurry,” you tell the children.

But your quickened pace is not enough to outrun what’s behind you.

A blaster shot whizzes past your head. Turning, you see a squadron of troopers approaching. You pull the children behind a pile of stacked crates and untuck the blaster from the holster strapped to the back of your trousers. You wait until several rounds of fire stop before reaching your arm around the crate and firing back.

The troopers pause their assault, finding their own cover as you continue to fire. You manage to hit a few of them, but there are still too many for you to flee safely. You pull back behind the metal crates and face four worried expressions.

“I’m going to cover you while you run to that next pile.” You jerk your chin to the crates diagonal to where you’re crouched. “On my signal.”

Lyra places a hand on your arm. A frown pulls the corner of her lips downward.

“I’ll be right behind you,” you assure her.

You look between each of them as you count to three and then start shooting again. You step into the middle of the alley while the children dash toward the crates. You dodge a blaster shot. Taking out another three troopers, your feet move backward toward the children. Another blast just misses you as you roll onto the dirt and land at their feet safely behind the crates.

Getting to your hands and knees, you peek around the corner of the barricade and count four troopers remaining. You start to think it won’t be as difficult to get out of this situation as you initially predicted. But then you see a dark figure emerge from the cloud of dirt.

He wears robes as black as a moonless night sky. His tall yet built figure halts to position himself behind the remaining troopers. He reaches beneath his robe and reveals a circular object, a large ring with a handle running through the middle that he holds onto. He lifts it and a beat passes before two red sabers burst from either end. Glowing crimson eyes meet yours and you can’t fight the shiver that runs down your spine.

“Okay,” you say as you retreat behind the barricade. “Here’s what we’re doing. You’re all going to go ahead and get the ship ready.”

“What?” Petro asks.

“Master, no!” Lyra shouts.

“You’re all going ahead,” you repeat firmly, looking at each of them. “Get the ship ready. If I’m not back before the sun touches the mountain, then you leave without me.”

Tara’s brow creases, her lips part to voice her own disagreement, but you speak again.

“You must do this.” Four pairs of shoulders deflate. They must recall your words from the night before because they don’t argue further. “Stay together and don’t stop until you reach the mountain.”

You manage an encouraging smile before you count again. On three, the children jump to their feet and sprint toward the end of the alley. A few blaster shots fly past you and you turn your head to make sure they made it off safely. You catch sight of Lyra’s cloak as they disappear around the corner before turning back and advancing on the troopers. You take out the last of them, and now it’s just you and the mysterious figure left in the alley.

“You’re not what I expected,” he states inquisitively, voice altered by the modulator within his mask. It hides his true face and you’re not sure if that makes him more menacing or not.

“Sorry to disappoint,” you respond, dryly.

“Nevertheless, Lord Vader will be pleased with your capture. He’s been searching for you.”

“Vader?” You’ve never heard the name before. Must be some new Imperial tasked with capturing any remaining Jedi. But why would he be searching for you specifically? “I don’t know any Vader.”

“But he knows you.” The mysterious figure hums, a deep and unsettling sound. “And how do you think I’ll be rewarded when I return with not just one Jedi, but a batch of younglings?”

“Unfortunately for you,” you tuck your blaster into its holster, “you’ll never find out.”

You take a deep breath in as you take your stance. He wields a lightsaber, so you suspect he might also be a Force wielder. He won’t be easy to defeat like the troopers who lay scattered around you.

Wind blows through the alley, disrupting more of the dirt and clouding the battleground between you. He charges first, swinging his dual saber, but you quickly side step his attack. You crouch down to swing your leg and take him off his feet but he leaps high, higher than any regular life form should. He confirms your suspicions about being a Force wielder when he uses the Force to hurl you against the pile of crates. Your head smacks against the hard metal, and you barely have time to blink before he’s on you again. He towers above you and raises his weapon. He brings it down without hesitation, but you raise your hand before it can slice through your shoulder. It’s a battle of strength. The prize is your severed arm. The Force vibrates chaotically between you and your adversary. Drops of perspiration bead down from your temple as the heat of the saber inches closer.

Your eyes flick down to his hand. In a quick movement, you grab the hilt of the saber where the horizontal handle meets one end of the ring above his hand, twisting up and in the opposite direction of his hold. When his grip on the hilt weakens, you push off your feet and take control of the saber. You continue the disarming movement so that the saber makes a fluid arc that slashes clean through his torso.

He grunts as realization dawns on him that it’s over. You won. His body drops to the floor in two halves. You wait until you see the life leave his eyes, then you power down the saber. It’s a strange design, one you’ve never seen before. Part of you is intrigued. But the longer you hold it the more darkness begins to bleed at the edges of your mind. You toss it to the ground unceremoniously and hurry toward the end of the alley, leaving the town behind and heading toward the mountain.

The sunlight is already touching the mountain but you’re confused when you reach the cave and the ship is still inside, surrounded by the haphazardly discarded large rocks that covered the entrance. Immediately, you feel something is very wrong, and it becomes even more apparent when Lyra comes running down the open ramp of the ship. She’s calling your name as she holds out her hands that are covered in blood.

You sprint inside with Lyra right behind you and find Tara lying on her back on the floor with her head in Gungi’s lap. He has a paw pressed to her torso to stop the bleeding, but Lyra takes over again when she drops by her friend’s side.

”While we were running out of the alley Tara was hit by a ricochet.” Petro’s not looking at you as he speaks. He’s rummaging around frantically through the compartments for a med pack. “She’s lost a lot of blood.”

You sink to your knees beside Tara. Her breathing is slowing down. You can feel her fading away. Your left hand takes hers and you smooth the hair from her face with the other. She stares up at you with watery eyes.

“I’m sorry, Master.” Her voice is weak. It’s a soft plea for forgiveness. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”

“It’s not your fault. None of this is your fault,” you assure her gently. “You were very brave. You have such a good heart, Tara. I’m so proud of you.”

You hold back your tears and try to keep a comforting smile on your face. You don’t want her last moments to be filled with sorrow. You hold her hand until her grip loosens and she releases her final breath.

Gungi lets out an anguished howl.

Lyra begins to sob.

Petro drops silently beside you.

Tara lays before you all, lifeless.

i do not have a taglist. please follow @bungalowbear-archive and turn on notifications.

#catalog #across the stars x #hunter x reader #tbb hunter x reader #the bad batch #star wars #jedi!reader

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eirikrjs · 9 months

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UPDATE 9/2/23

Wow, it's almost fall and I'm still kickin', so here's a proper update about what's been going on with me. I do feel great most days, and with Halloween in season around the US, it makes me very happy. As far as stroke recovery goes, my leg has a newly made brace and my walking in general has greatly improved the past few months. I really don't roll my left foot anymore, in other words, my foot can go flat instead of landing on the ankle and possibly causing injury.

My arm is still mostly nothing but a couple weeks back I was able to move my shoulder again so there's hope. I also got a home electrical stimulation device so I give my arm and hand a jolt for an hour everyday. With time, I feel confident i'll recover.

A great help with my recovery has been the amazing @dagdasgoddess , a fellow young stroke survivor who has been watching out for me and offering encouragement every day for a couple months now, exactly when I needed it. Mentally, stroke recovery is pretty damn tough but most days I feel positive about it, with great thanks to her.

And now on to some business. Shortly before my stroke I was planning on celebrating the 10th anniversary of my blog (which would have been in December of last year, but I was still in the hospital, obviously...) And one of the things I was going to do was photograph and review all the smt demon figures I have, using my special diorama table. I got around to starting the project a couple weeks before the stroke, naturally starting with the Leonard figure. Here's one of the pics:

I also made something of an anniversary banner, just because, I guess:

I also want to talk about some milestones reached, starting with some follower counts. By December last year I finally surpassed 2k followers, so thank you so very much. This is after Kanekos Crib Notes quickly dwarfed my own blog followers shortly after its establishment in like 2014. But now my own blog is even ahead of kcn, as undoubtedly its current annual schedule limits its growth and reach. (But hey, it's almost October, aka KCN MONTH)

The last milestone is above: my Stealing Knowledge blogger has reached half a million views! Unbelievable, thanks for reading and sharing over the years! Identity crisis part 3 remains the most viewed, with over 50k on its own.

Finally, I want to talk about the future. Another 10th anniversary plan was to try and monetize the blog somehow, probably via a Patreon for new articles and such and many other ideas, maybe even doing YouTube videos to answer asks instead of them being all text. I have lots of other ideas too, but they'll have to wait until my arm works again. So instead of monetizing the future, for now I'm just going to ask y'all kindly to chip in for the blog's past. I'm amazed at how much activity the blog still generates from--let's call it "legacy content".

To that end, I have set myself up a kofi account where you can show your appreciation for that "legacy", kuwabara, kuwabara, if you'd like. All money earned will go towards paying down bills accrued during my recovery, like my hyperbaric treatments. In perfect honesty, it's been around 3000 US dollars so far. Don't feel obligated to contribute and thank you all for still sticking around with me despite my relative inactivity. And if course, continue keeping @sorenblr busy if you wish.

I would also not expect my own recovery before next year, that's just stroke for you. Thank you all!!!!!

p.s. I was featured as a stroke survivor again on another therapy facebook post:

#the stroke #megaten #shin megami tensei #leonard #stealing knowledge #volgin #the philosophers' legacy

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soahbee · 2 months

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Story time! The gathering. part 1

Hello girls, I'm here with the update! It is always difficult to write at these times because there is so much going on at these gatherings.

Let me start by saying that I arrived at the party 1 hour late. (I met a friend before that) At first I was sad, but then I didn't mind, because when I arrived the atmosphere was already great, everyone was in a good mood and people were drinking and laughing loudly. (there were a lot of us again) Of course, I didn't take off my coat, I was already looking where R could be. Obviously, I couldn't find him standing at the door, so I quickly started to take off my coat and in the meantime I adjusted my hair in the mirror to be perfect. After that comes the main point and why I didn't regret being late. "You're late dear" - said the voice that made my heart beat faster. R was leaning against the wall with a glass of champagne in his hand, watching me straighten my hair (very awkward situation) Girls, I can't even tell you how attractive he was, he was wearing a black short-sleeved shirt and black linen pants. (I almost tore it off) his hair was slicked back and a few strands hung forward. 😳

So, after that, I greeted him and quickly went through the people and of course, I caught dad in the living room with a big hug. <3 Then, before I even got to the kitchen, a couple of my father's friends caught me and made me drink two half-glass of vodka. bruh😭😭 Well, here comes the point, when I got to the kitchen, R was also standing there talking to a couple of men, and even though I decided not to be shy, somehow I still couldn't start a conversation, so I just poured myself a champagne... In the meantime, dad asked me to make the fruit salad if I was already late (oops) and UHH R came next to me and asked if he would help me cut them up. Of course, I immediately said yes, so we made the fruit salad together!! This part was so good because we talked a lot and it was a great feeling to make a salad together.

I knew from that that he had been drinking more, that he teases me a lot more and skins my face all the time. Even now, when I was about to put the apples in the bowl, he poked my side, causing half of them to fall to the ground, and then he even laughed. He seriously embarrassed me so much with that. But of course I didn't give up and threw a piece of blueberry in his face and we started fighting like five-year-olds. lol But then I stopped when one of the cold blueberries fell under my top and while I was grumpily trying to fish it out, R just grinned and then came closer to me and said.. (girls, don't die) "Can I help you take it out?" ???????!!!!!!!! EXCUSE ME It was a flirt that I couldn't handle, I was so embarrassed and I think he knew what he was doing because he just laughed and said he was just joking. 😭😭 Sir I'm going to die because of you!

So far it's very cute and I'm started to feel really good, but frankly there's always someone who spoils it all. A woman stole R's attention and they started talking, so I finished the fruit salad alone. :(((

But in the meantime I was also talking to people and R had his back to me, we were behind each other's backs the whole time and that's how I heard what they were talking about. In retrospect, maybe I didn't want to hear it... Because it was burned into my memory that R was asked about a woman, what was going on with her/them. ??? HUH? WHAT You can imagine that I was eating a fruit salad, but my fork stuck in my mouth when I heard this. I kind of guessed that R wasn't waiting for me and was goo and dating other women, but it was still very painful to face it.🤧 *crying* I rather filled another glass of champagne and maybe I shouldn't have done that because I could still feel the alcohol a little. (but idc)

I'll continue in another post soon because it would be very long. SORRY AHH Until then, process the events girls, because I haven't succeeded since then. lol 😫😫😫

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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 10 months

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"get me a damned matcha" | Chapter 9: February I

{{ Chapter 8: January I | Chapter 10: March I }} Chapter Directory

mutual pining??!?!?!

if you wanna get tagged for updates, fill out this form here!

✧ pairing ➼ levi ackerman x fem!reader, college x coffee shop x roommates!au ✧ summary ➼ After you find yourself plagued with misfortune due to struggles in your personal and family life, you find yourself needing to move last minute. As a junior in undergrad with little money and little social support, you considered yourself lucky when you found a sublease that was close to campus and was relatively cheap. Unfortunately, it seemed that your roommate did not seem to be so excited regarding your presence. ✧ content/warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, mutual pining, idiots in love, alcohol, college-typical parties, floche being gross ✧ word count ➼ ~5k

"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!"

Oluo came barging into the classroom like a freight train, yelling at the top of his lungs. The Honors Society general members hadn't even come in yet, so the only ones that were forced to experience the unrequited enthusiasm were Gunther, Petra, and you.

"God, Oluo, you're going to perpetuate this headache I'm rapidly developing," you grumbled as you shut your eyes and rubbed at your forehead.

"You're usually just as enthusiastic about this, prez'!"

It was true. In the past, you were stressed, but also quite excited about Valentine's Day. It was a day that was generally guaranteed to be dedicated to your romantic partner and used to carry heavy significance in your life, but that was before your relationship with Zack imploded. It wasn't even that you missed him. It was just that experiencing being single on Valentine's Day for the first time in years made your mood bounce back and forth all over the place.

"Well, I guess I'm not feeling it today," you said with a sigh. "Come on, let's get set up before the freshmen start coming in."

You brought the box of Nicolo's pastries over to the innermost wall of the classroom and began setting them on the plastic trays you had bought from the nearby dollar store.

You were more than happy moping by yourself in the corner, so you found yourself pursing your lips when you heard Petra walk over. She went up to you and helped set up some of the utensils in plastic cups.

"You're grumpy because of Zack, aren't you?"

Petra was perceptive only when you didn't want her to be. You paused and a frown appeared on your face as you looked over towards her.

"This is what you decide to talk about?"

"There's nothing wrong with being single," she said with a shrug.

You groaned as you turned away to continue setting up the pastries, being a bit rougher with them compared to how you were handling them a few minutes ago.

"You think I don't know that, Petra?" you snapped. "If this is all you're going to talk about, Oluo needs plenty of help getting the drinks set up."

"I'm just saying," she responded, her tone still gentle despite your hostility, "just because you're single doesn't mean you have to be miserable today."

You shut your eyes and took a deep breath to keep yourself from snapping further at your friend. She really did have your best interests in mind, although that didn't help your mood.

"I get it, Petra," you said through clenched teeth. "Please change the topic or go help Oluo. I'm really not in the mood to be talking about this."

You watched Petra walk away through the corner of your eye. Although your mood wasn't great to begin with, it was now officially ruined. Part of you felt bad for snapping at her when she was only trying to help you feel better. If this was a few months ago, it was likely that you'd just give her a half-hearted smile before moving on. You didn't know what was up with you.

You weren't too preoccupied with getting into a relationship of any sort at this point, but it was still annoying being forced to spend the day watching other couples be happy next to each other. A part of you was envious, with another part of you being simply annoyed by the blatant PDA surrounding you for the next few hours.

You knew you had to prepare yourself if you were going to have anything even remotely close to having a good time at the party you were planning on attending tonight. It was Valentine's Day themed, which was already off-putting, but you felt obligated to go.

Staying in, watching a television show, and ruminating about how miserable you were sounded more appealing, but you didn't want to be the only one in your cohort that didn't go to the party. Whether or not they were all actually going was up in the air, but you still felt a social obligation to attend, whether you liked it or not.

~~~~~

“Got any fun plans tonight, Levi?”

Levi effectively ignored Nicolo’s question as he continued pumping out the orders he was receiving for his station. Levi was like a well-oiled machine working his station, getting orders out at speeds most people couldn’t comprehend.

“I’m here, aren’t I?” he grumbled.

His speed and ability to multi-task and fulfill orders was much needed on a day like today: Valentine’s Day. He didn’t particularly care for the “holiday”, but the café served Valentine’s Day themed lattes for the overzealous undergrads that were trying to woo whoever had piqued their interests at the time before breaking it off in 2-3 weeks after the honeymoon phase passed. The café was obnoxiously red and pink. He couldn’t wait for it to be over.

Not only did his shift change, but he also had to suffer through seeing couples show off distasteful PDA. If he saw one more couple rubbing noses and kissing each other in the doorway, he was going to gouge his own eyes out.

“Yeah, but we’re only open until 5 today,” Nicole reminded him. “Whatcha got planned afterwards? Anything for Valentine’s?”

The passively annoyed expression he shot in Nicolo’s direction was enough to answer his question. Of course he didn’t have anything planned.

Not only did he not care for relationships right now, but the last one he did have wasn’t particularly memorable. The last time he was in one was some fling he had freshman year of undergrad that fell apart because he was too busy dealing with the financial aid bullshit that resulted from his uncle’s disinterest in him. His partner at the time didn’t understand and also didn’t put in the effort to understand.

So no, he did not have any plans for Valentine’s Day, and he couldn’t see him having them anytime soon.

“You going out with that pastry girl that’s been hanging out here?”

Levi chose to deflect Nicolo’s question with another question.

“Oh, Sasha?” he mused, slightly looking away as some color rose to his cheeks. “Not really, but I’m cooking a dinner for her at home tonight. I’ve never had someone enjoy my food as much before.”

“Hmm,” Levi mumbled in acknowledgement as he turned back towards his station.

Although he couldn’t imagine dedicating a whole evening just to cooking, he did somewhat understand Nicolo’s sentiment regarding how good it felt to have someone enjoy your cooking. Levi also got that same satisfaction whenever someone enjoyed the specific way he brewed his teas.

He clenched his jaw as you popped up in his mind, as you were the most consistent customer that came in and really enjoyed his teas.

It wasn’t the same type of relationship as Nicolo and Sasha, however. Even if it was, he doubted you’d be interested in spending a whole night focusing on tea. He could already picture you babbling on about something regarding drama with your friends the entire night, which sounded like fresh hell to him.

"Are you just going to stay at home grumbling about all the papers you have to read?" Nicolo asked, pulling Levi out of his head.

Levi scoffed as he looked at him, neither confirming nor denying his assumption.

"You know, you really should get out there more! Might do you some good to see someone," Nicolo suggested before pausing, "although your abrasive personality definitely makes it more difficult."

Levi gave him a disapproving and unamused look.

You popped up into his head again. A relationship was out of the question. He already had you to deal with. Dating someone on top of that—especially after the bullshit that happened last month—and his school and work responsibilities sounded like an absolute nightmare.

"Not interested," he grumbled.

"At least get out more! Some stress relief might help with your focus on those papers you seem to be struggling to get through."

Levi didn't immediately shoot down this idea, but he also wasn't too sure on what he would be able to do. He wasn't particularly interested in parties and he didn't have too much of a social life. In fact, wandering through parties last month while searching for you was the most social activity he had gotten since Halloween.

"Not a chance."

~~~~~

"This is the worst mistake of my life."

"Oh c'mon!" you said as you shoved Levi forward into the frat house. "It can't be that bad! A drink could also loosen you up."

Levi scoffed.

"I don't get drunk."

You rolled your eyes.

"Well, you were the one that insisted on coming with me."

"Yeah," he said as he glanced over his shoulder back at you with a scowl, "so you don't get fucking lost in the middle of the night again."

You rolled your eyes again, this time followed with a groan of exasperation.

"You're so dramatic," you scolded as you gave him one final push before wandering off into the crowd.

Levi watched your small form disappear within the sea of people and glanced at the door which was looking more appealing with every passing second. Part of him did regret coming to the crowded and rowdy party, but the thought of running around looking for you again sounded like an absolute pain in the ass.

You slightly glanced back at Levi who was shooting you a glare across the room. A part of you did feel guilty for what had happened last month—you drunk texted him, he dragged his ass around town in the cold looking for you, and then he took care of you after you caught a cold as a result of your reckless desire to search for food while freezing. You understood his ire, but his insistence on coming with you threw you off. He could've just said no if you texted him again.

Your eyes flashed up as you saw him making his way towards you. Upon looking up, not only did you see him, but you also saw quite a few familiar figures—mostly that of people who were not supposed to be there.

One of the Honor's Society members blatantly stood near the drinks station, likely already at least two drinks in. Jean casually chatted with another freshman with black hair and freckles. You looked around to see if there were more Honors Society members that you had to turn a blind eye to.

You recognized two others that weren't Honors Society members, but had shown up to some of your events. One of them was a blonde freshman that you were sure was the daughter of the mayor, although you never got close enough to confirm if that was true. She was interacting quite closely with an upperclassman with freckles that was wearing a brown ponytail and you had to avert your eyes to avoid staring. Your eyes landed right on Marlo and you had to quickly look away to pretend that you didn't see him drinking inappropriately. He was talking to another girl with short, wavy, dark blonde hair that was scowling at him as he looked awkwardly off into the distance, as if some message she was trying to send was being missed entirely.

They're definitely being more bold, aren't they?

It didn't surprise you. It was the spring semester. This was usually around the time that most freshmen that were initially hesitant on attending parties began to embrace it—whether that was a good or bad thing depended on context.

Levi gradually caught up with you and helped you push your way through the crowd, his hand gently ghosting over the small of your back.

You felt chills running up your spine as you felt his touch. You had elected to wear one of your shirts that had an open back, so you felt his fingers directly on your skin. Your pulse hastened as you felt your face heat up.

There were a lot of people at the party.

There were a lot of people, so it increased your anxiety about being here.

Yeah, that was it.

You shrugged off the chills that were rapidly taking over your body and made a beeline for the drink station.

You didn't know what was going on with you. The last time you felt this anxious at a party was when Petra had triggered you about your parents and then at the Rumbling before that when you saw Zack, but it was different. While you couldn't say that you liked feeling this anxiety, it wasn't entirely unwelcome either.

You flinched when you reached your hand out for the stack of cups near the drink station and felt your fingers brush up against Levi's. Heat rose to your cheeks, although you weren't sure if it was because you bumped hands with Levi or if it was out of embarrassment about the fact that you had even flinched in the first place.

Luckily for you, it seemed that Levi was just as distressed, as the both of you immediately withdrew your hands.

"Sorry," Levi muttered as he cleared his throat, putting both his hands back into his jacket pockets.

You shot him an awkward, brief smile of acknowledgement before turning back towards the drinks and pouring one for yourself before immediately running away into the crowd.

The source of your anxiety was Levi. You were at least emotionally self-aware enough to know that. You were anxious when he followed you closely to the drink station and then again once you had accidentally brushed up against him just now.

All that really meant was that you had to get away from him for now if you didn't want to be stressed during the entirety of this party.

You were able to tell that you were slowly beginning to feel more nervous around him, although nervous wasn't really the best word for it. It wasn't really nervousness. Sure, the physiological signs were the same—your face would heat up, your pulse would hasten, and your breath would get caught in your throat. These were all signs that indicated anxiety, but at the same time, anxiety and nervousness didn't feel like the right words to describe what was going on. You couldn't quite pinpoint what it was and it was driving you nuts.

You easily disappeared into the crowd. Levi didn't follow.

The whole point of him coming was to be there to drag your ass home if you got into trouble again, but he couldn't get himself to follow you.

His hand felt like it was burning from where you had brushed up against him. He frowned at himself as he sipped on the drink he had poured for himself, immediately grimacing at the poorly made cocktail whipped up by inexperienced undergrads. He put it down and opted for a beer instead.

He didn't understand why he withdrew his hand so quickly, or why you had flinched. Did he startle you? Why did he feel so awkward afterwards?

Levi groaned to himself. He already regretted coming to the party itself. He should've just chilled at the 24-hour library and do literally anything else until it was time to pick you up. Everything could have been avoided had he just refused to come with. Unlike the Rumbling, in which he attended with Hange and Miche, he didn’t know anyone here. The only person he could be bothered to socialize with would be you, but he felt the increasing need to avoid you at all costs, despite his original reason for tagging along with you. He was stuck in the corner of the room, sipping on cheap beer while pretending that the crowd wasn’t actually as big as it was.

Your nerves quickly faded once you began drinking and chatting with some of your other classmates that had shown up, although you took care to avoid the freshmen that technically were not supposed to be there. The new semester had just started, so everyone was still in a fairly good mood regarding talking about school or even gossiping about faculty. Once assignments and grades began mattering, those topics would be nowhere to be found.

Apparently some drama had been going on between Professor Zachary, the dean of the university, and the mayor and some of his secretaries over the legitimacy of the election. The drama had trickled down to the rest of the staff, leaving everyone—particularly the financial aid office—worried about future funding from the local government.

While this drama generally wouldn’t have caught your interest in the slightest, your scholarship was a huge factor in you being able to attend this school, so you hoped that everything was over-exaggerated and that there wouldn’t be any actual issues. Otherwise, everything you had worked so hard for would have been for naught if you couldn’t pay your tuition.

Before you knew it, the house quickly filled up with people. You found yourself wandering back towards the drink station to haphazardly grab another drink. However, given the fact that you were more than a little intoxicated and that there were way too many people in way too small of a space, you found yourself stumbling over your own feet.

You tripped and immediately fell into someone's chest.

You panicked and immediately began to apologize out of embarrassment.

"Oh! I'm sorry-"

You felt both relief and further embarrassment when you saw who you had fallen into—Levi.

Blood rushed to your face as you leaned against him. You were so close that you could feel his pulse against yours. You could even smell the subtle scent of the cologne that he had put on in the morning, despite the stench of alcohol permeating the air otherwise. It was earthy and pleasant. It fit him well.

You were looking directly into his gray eyes that held an unreadable expression. His hair fell perfectly over his eyes. He was wearing a simple button-up shirt with a black jacket over him and you didn’t notice until now how well it accentuated his figure—particularly his arms, shoulders, and chest—although that might have been the alcohol talking. At least, that's what you convinced yourself it was. Whether it was actually true or not didn't matter. Despite how awkward you felt, you didn't really want to move. You were oddly comfy.

You felt those symptoms of your "anxiety" rising: your hastened pulse, your flushed cheeks, and your breath getting caught in your throat. Despite this, you didn't move.

The both of you stayed still for a while. You soon began to notice his hands that were on your waist after he had caught you. If your body was already reacting strongly to his hand on your back earlier, his touch on your waist was driving your heart rate through the roof. His touch was warm and firm. Chills traveled up and down your body as you made skin-to-skin contact with him. You felt your entire body warming up as you continued to look directly into his eyes. You didn’t want to take your gaze off him. Even the chaos of all the people around you seemed to have been lost on you as you stood agonizingly still up against him.

It was the alcohol. That'd explain it. Alcohol made you more sensitive and would explain your hastened pulse.

After you rationalized that to yourself, you suddenly got up and cleared your throat, finally breaking your gaze from his stupidly pretty eyes.

"...crowded party."

You vaguely heard Levi mumble.

"Y-Yeah," you said as you nodded at him. "Got crowded fast."

Levi didn't get a chance to respond and he was only able to watch as you immediately bolted away from him and into the crowd again to avoid looking at him.

He clenched his jaw and sighed to himself. He was more than annoyed at himself for how awkward he was getting around you. Unlike you, he couldn't say that it was just due to the alcohol—and he wasn't even drinking that much in the first place. What was he thinking, holding you for as long as he was? He should’ve just shrugged you off him as soon as you got your bearings. Instead, he gazed into your eyes for much too long, unable to take the feeling of his hands on your waist out of his mind. The tips of his ears had grown pink as he held you and he only hoped that you were too drunk and that it was too dark for you to notice. He didn’t know what was going on, and he wasn’t particularly in the right mood or headspace to figure it out, especially not with you around.

At this point, you made it your personal goal to avoid Levi until it was time to leave. You found yourself sitting at the drink station, sipping on the not-so-pleasant Jungle Juice that you were too buzzed to notice tasted like shit.

"Long time no see."

You heard a familiar voice and glanced over at the source.

It was the same sophomore that you saw at the Rumbling—the 'lanky parasite' that Levi so rudely dubbed him as—Floche.

"...I guess not," you said as you stared at him, hesitant with your response. "You following me?"

He stepped closer.

"A girl as pretty as you, how could I not?"

Unlike at the Rumbling, when you were anxious and defensive from seeing Zack and therefore immediately rejected Floche's advances, you now did a shy smile, although it still felt awkward as fuck.

Although you rejecting him would have done little to stop him, he immediately began moving closer, and you could have sworn that his eyes traveled up and down your figure briefly.

You were still uncomfortable—that hadn't changed—but a part of you appreciated the compliments.

If you were less intoxicated and had a bit more time to sort out your anxiety regarding both your grumpy roommate and today in general, you'd be able to recognize your increased vulnerability that resulted from being single for the first time on Valentine's Day as well as your newfound dynamic with Levi. If you had recognized that, you probably would've told Floche to promptly fuck off again.

However, you didn't, and before long, you ended up exchanging numbers with him.

Levi stood still from across the room, watching that 'lanky parasite' flirt with you before getting your number. He felt himself get increasingly irritated the minute he saw Floche walking towards you with a suggestive look. He found it strange that he was so bothered by it, but figured that it was because his social battery had been drained for the night and that it didn't actually have anything to do with the exchange he was witnessing in front of him.

His mood significantly soured once he saw the two of you exchange numbers. His grip on his beer bottle tightened as he chugged the rest of it in one go, tossing the bottle into the trash before walking towards you, under the guise of getting another drink.

Levi leaned on the wall next to you, clearly not having any actual intention of getting another drink.

"You come to these parties just to flirt with anyone that sets their eyes on you?"

The comment caught you off-guard. You blinked at him, unsure of how to respond to his oddly rude comment.

"Wh-What?" you asked defensively, taking slight offense to his comment once you were able to process it.

"Nothing," he mumbled. "It's getting too rowdy. Let's go."

At this point, a scowl was permanently plastered onto his face and you could tell that he was more than ready to leave.

You stared at him as he turned away and grabbed his car keys out of his pants pocket. He took a few steps towards the door before glancing back at you.

"You coming?"

You clenched your jaw, trying to swallow the increasing sensation of an uncomfortable lump in your throat.

"...okay," you whispered, getting up and following him out of the house.

Levi looked at your upset expression and didn't say a word as he turned away and walked towards his car. He was feeling much too irritated to deal with anything other than getting into the car and driving home to forget this night ever happened.

~~~~~

The car ride home was silent. Levi had barely drank at the party and had been long sober by the time you actually got to leaving. You had drunk significantly more, although you were starting to sober up as well.

You stubbornly looked out the window with your arms crossed, still trying to process how you felt regarding Levi's unexpected comment.

You were offended. That much, you knew. It wasn't the first time he had insulted you, but some part did legitimately believe that the two of you had moved past it. You had come to terms with some deal about getting along with each other and he's been around during some of your more vulnerable moments.

Yet here he was, blatantly insulting you again. You were already somewhat emotionally compromised because of your unease regarding being single on Valentine's Day and you had been anxious around him all night, so his comment on top of all of that seemed to hit you much harder than any of his previous insults ever had.

"I'm not just...flirting," you mumbled.

He glanced over at you, clearly able to tell that you were upset with the way that you were avoiding his gaze and your low volume of speech.

It took him a second to respond.

"...I know," he said quietly.

You frowned and then turned to look at him before speaking more audibly.

"Then why'd you say it?"

Levi didn't answer.

Not wanting to waste your energy fighting with him over his weird behavior, you let out a frustrated huff before crossing your arms and glaring out the window again.

No words were exchanged for the rest of the car ride, or even during the walk into the apartment and into your separate rooms.

You were more than irritated. Petra pissed you off at the meeting, you had been high-strung all night, and the one person you thought you could count on was acting weird and throwing snappy comments at you that bothered you on a much deeper level than they should have.

Realizing that you were too wound up to go to bed, you found yourself leaning against the railing on the balcony connected to your apartment. The cold winter air helped calm you down.

You turned towards the door as you heard footsteps approaching. You saw Levi's figure approaching from behind you, holding a bottle of beer in each hand.

He offered you one by raising it towards you and you stared at him, still frowning, before eventually taking it. He was still acting weird and you were still pissed.

You sipped on it in silence, glaring at the horizon as he stood quietly next to you.

"Sorry," he said after a while. It was quiet and part of you wasn't sure if you had actually heard him correctly.

You blinked at him.

"What?"

"The comment," he muttered awkwardly as he leaned on the railing and looked at the ground below. "Was just pissed from being at the party, I guess."

Your frown gradually softened as you looked at him. It was weird that he was apologizing, but it was also weird that you cared so much. Even after you had seemingly formed a truce with him, it's not like he suddenly became a pleasant person to be around. His personality was still abrasive and he still lacked a filter whenever he was annoyed, and you never caught him apologizing for any of it.

You bit on your bottom lip subtly in an attempt to calm your nerves regarding the awkwardness that had been surrounding the two of you all night.

"Well," you finally spoke, attempting to break the tension, "good news is that you didn't have to chase me around this time?"

You heard a quiet scoff.

"Guess not."

"Told you so," you shot him a smug look as you took another swig of the beer.

"That's because I went with you, dumbass."

A small grin appeared on your face at his response. At least it had returned to your usual banter.

"To be honest, I didn't even really want to go out tonight. Think I was trying to prove something to Petra."

"Oh?" he mumbled as he raised an eyebrow at you.

"Yeah," you said with an annoyed tone. "She kept insisting that I was purposefully being mopey over being single on Valentine's Day even though I kept on telling her I wasn't."

You looked over towards Levi once you noticed that he wasn't responding. He was frowning at the ground again.

"Nicolo was being a pain in the ass at the café today," he finally said. "Something about needing to get out more."

You found yourself smiling at the shared ire between the two of you.

"To us miserable singles?" you suggested before raising your beer as if you were giving a toast.

He gave you a skeptical look for a few seconds before sighing.

"Fine," he said reluctantly before clinking the spout of his beer bottle with yours. "To being miserably single."

He took a swig of his beer.

"Apparently," he added on, with a hint of heavy reluctance in his voice.

You glanced at him out of the corner of your eye as you raised your beer bottle to your lips.

You already knew Valentine's Day was going to suck this year because of all the bullshit that had happened in the past couple months, but Levi's presence made it just a little less lonely. You weren’t entirely sure what it was, but even just his presence was enough to make you feel not completely alone, something that none of your friends were able to achieve. He wasn’t actively doing anything to make you feel that way, but you still felt it nonetheless.

You smiled to yourself as you enjoyed his presence next to you. It was easy to forget your problems around him, even if it was something as silly as being single on Valentine's Day.

#: @levisbrat25 @gothgril69 @sckerman @berrijam @notgoodforlife @meowjaa @averysmolbear @roseofdarknessblog @bejewelledd @hhighkey @ayame236 @sad-darksoul @velouria17 @kamyru @l1zk4 @layenacreates @lamees004 @whoami-72 @highgoon69 @chaotic-on-main @levishotgf @nube55 @chosos-mascara @heichoucleanfreak @svftackerman

#cw: alcohol #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi heichou x reader #captain levi x reader #levi #levi ackerman #levi heichou #captain levi #modern!au levi #coffeeshop!au levi #college!au levi #attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #snk #fics: matcha

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ask-the-totally-real-peppino · 3 months

Text

(I have been trying to write this post for a while, but it keeps coming out like a sob story, and it is really not that deep jkfdgkj

So I am just going to say it, bc you guys know I love to ramble for ages, and I need some opinions

1 year of this blog is tomorrow (or today depending on how long I take to write this kjldfg), and I really do appreciate you all being here - if you have been here since the beginning, or just followed recently - if you've sent an ask, liked, reblogged, shared with a friend, theorised, made fanart, or followed me to my art blog and watched me make (and continue to make) a billion clones, anything; thank you

I made this blog on a whim, only like a week after getting into Pizza Tower, and I had no idea it would turn into what it is now

Of course, in the beginning there were a lot of actual posts, like with backgrounds and multiple characters, and I'd post several times a day if I could - and while I was having fun, it was not ideal - I'd frequently post at 7am after spending all night working on a post then I'd pass out, I'd forgo eating or showering just to draw, and I had wrecked my wrist several times, and continue to push pass the pain just to post

It wasn't just hyperfixation, it was obsession - much easier to realise that in retrospect

I was also medicated at the time, I had been on antidepressants for 3 years, so around April (I think) I ran out of meds and was unable to get more due too third party issues/unable to get in contact with my doctor/etc (and unbeknownst to me at the time, the last two packs I had were expired) - so I am sure you can imagine the sort of affect suddenly going cold turkey on the med that make you not wanna die has on a person - I was not doing great to put it lightly

But I still wanted to continue - so many people had praised me on the frequency of posts, and how excited they were and all this validation - I couldn't let people down! (Also I was, and still am, a disabled shut-in loser with no friends, posting is like the only social interaction I had/have kdfgkgfd)

But I think I did - I intimidated myself out of drawing main posts with how much work they were, started the intermission even though I said I shouldn't, had no script or direction and that I was not 100% invested in to try to motivate myself back into main posts, and it was just easier to draw silly ooc posts than do the thing I really wanted to do instead

Of course, this is not any of you guys' fault - I have always had this issue of starting something, it getting way bigger than I can manage, crashing and then just unable to get going again - I have so many unfinished comics, half-done projects and abandoned askblogs it's not even funny - but it's also like, not the end of the world, if I don't finish things I start for fun - sure, I'll feel guilty as hell for a while, but life moves on

So that being said, I would still very much like to continue the story here - I have been working on some stuff in the background (I even updated Pep's reference in the last few days, with a ton of new stuff), but I still don't think it's gonna be soon - I am doing somewhat better than I was, and I actually have an appointment for with my doctor finally (I will probably have to do some reassessments since they can't just put me back on the meds, after not having them for almost a year, and then I'd have to probably get reaccustomed to side effects etc), so despite it all I am still here

I am not sure if I want to continue the intermission with Bean and Fiend at this time - I know a few folks enjoyed it (mostly bc Fiend kjsdfkj) - but as mentioned previously it was unplanned, unscripted, and I was quickly not feeling it, as I am sure some of you guys were too - the intention was for Fiend to give you guys another hint to the main story, but getting to that point was not fun - I might do a poll on this in a separate post

I also mentioned a while back that I would be cutting down the Big Post into smaller posts, and posting as and when parts were done - but once again, do not expect these soon - (although there is a very late Valentines post coming hopefully soon)

And I think that should hopefully be it for now - I know this is a huge post, and probably still a bit sob story-ish, but oh well - I also know that the hype for Pizza Tower had unfortunately died down significantly, but I'm still working on PT stuff on my art blog @smalltimidbean if you wanna see more silly things (and maybe some lore for here hehe)

It is also the first now, so happy birthday Pep

Okay, thank you, and see you later)

#ooc post

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hyunfilms · 2 years

Text

all for nothing | one.

♡ series masterlist

—summary: after experiencing heartbreak and betrayal, hyunjin has become incredibly closed off and reserved. he hated opening up to people, nor did he think the time or effort was worth it. but when hyunjin meets you, he finally realizes the importance of having someone by your side throughout all the ups and downs of life.

—pairing: hyunjin x f. reader

—genre: (18+) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 3.7k

—chapter warnings: nothing too bad, some cussing, very basic introduction to the fic, someone’s a meanie, hints at infidelity, mentions of parties and getting too drunk, some hints of anxiety, they all attend brigham in hawaiʻi but not every depiction of the school/area will match what it is in real life, apologies for any errors as i quickly skimmed through this before posting!

—notes: hi everyone! i hope you enjoy the start to this series. i’ll try to update every weekend from here on out. i’ve been on a writing hiatus for awhile, so i’m sorry if it starts off a little slow or anything like that. also, my chapters tend to be short because i like to spread out my chapters and lengthen the series that way. i do hope you like it! ♡

"Okay." You breathe out, staring out at the campus in front of you. "Shit." You mutter to yourself when you realize you have no idea where your first class of the day is located on this campus.

"Need help?" A black, shaggy haired boy appeared from behind you, a small smile creeping at the corner of his lips. You simply stare at him as you fully turn to give him your attention— clock ticking down to 7 minutes before your class would start.

"Is it obvious?" He shrugs and chuckles a bit.

"Yeah, kinda. No biggie though, still taking me a bit to get used to." His voice is deep, Australian accent strong. You almost wonder where it comes from with how not-so-intimidating he looks. "Felix." He puts his hand out.

"Y/N."

"Pleasure to meet you." He takes a look at the paper in your hands. "May I?"

"Sure." He takes it from your hands and nods slowly.

"Ah, okay. Duley Hall is down that way. I just had class there earlier this morning." He checks his watch. "We'll get you there in time."

"Thanks." You smile before awkwardly following alongside of him. Honestly, you were a bit relieved he had bumped into you. Your decision to attend the biology graduate program here at Brigham Young University was abrupt, almost incredibly last minute. You had decided on staying near home, continuing your education at Chaminade with familiar faces and staying comfortable in your safety zone. However, your teacher had offered you a position to work at his new lab in Brigham, offering to pay a good salary while being flexible with your class schedule. Dr. Kreher trusted you solely because you had been a student and intern of his since your undergrad sophomore year. He had seen you grow, seen you through your best and worst, seen you flourish in his lab. Because of the last minute agreement, you didn't have time to tour the entire campus before they were trying to meet deadlines to shuffle you into the next cohort. You were grateful, happy to have this opportunity come up right out of undergrad. Still, it wasn't easy suddenly having to switch from one university to another. You missed the friends you made, you missed the comfort and knowing the familiar. You missed being near home, you missed the convenience. Now, you were an hour and a half away by car, living in a small in-law on a family friend's property in exchange for some occasional nannying and light housework.

It all happened so fast. For something that placed you on the right path, somehow, you still felt lost.

You wondered how long it would last.

"Where'd you come from, if you don't mind me asking?" He turns to you, hands tugging onto his bag strap.

"Chaminade." He nods.

"That's on the opposite side of the island, isn't it? Almost two hours or so?"

"Mmm, pretty much."

"Why come out here?"

"Well, I was going to continue at Chaminade's graduate program, but one of my professors moved here and offered me a position in his research lab."

"Oh, that's sick. You're in the biology graduate program?" You nod.

"Mhm, I work with Dr. Kreher." Felix furrows his brows a bit and cocks his head to the side, confusion evident on his expression. "He's an infectious disease professor, not entirely sure what classes he'll be teaching though." He chuckles a bit.

"No worries, that's cool though. Must feel nice to know a professor like that, yeah?"

"Kinda." You give off a small laugh. "I feel like it's more pressure."

"I get that."

"What about you?"

"Psychology graduate program."

"Oh, cool!" You look at him with a smile.

"Mm, I suppose." He shrugs, shyly smiling. "So, I'm assuming your family is back in Waikiki?"

"Mhm. I was born and raised there. What about you? Are you from the island?" He shakes his head, which is probably a dumb question to ask being that his accent is pretty thick.

"No. I'm originally from Australia, my family's there. I moved to the big island for undergrad, then Oahu for the graduate program."

"Wow, now that's far. Why move from the big island?"

"Ah, I just like new sceneries, new adventures." He smiles again before leading you into Duley Hall, climbing up the steps right near the front entrance. He leads you to the second floor, turns left at the top and passes two doors before he stops in his tracks. "Welp, you made it with—" He checks his watch. "2 minutes to spare." He pokes his head into the classroom and notices a few empty seats. "Still have some good seats left."

"Thank you, Felix."

"No problem."

"Is your class nearby?"

"It's in another building across campus, but I'll get there, don't worry." You felt bad, but all you can do is nod. "See you around, Y/N. It was nice talking with you." And with that, you give him one last smile before heading into the classroom. The class sizes are standard— nothing too big, nothing too small. You head up to the third row of seats, sitting close to the opposite end. You silently sit your bag down, taking out your notebook and a couple of different colored pens, setting it neatly on the desktop. Suddenly, someone comes to sit next to you, a soft, warm smile on his face as he settles into his seat.

"Hi." He smiles and sets his bag down before crouching over to grab his book and notebook. "No one was sitting here, right? I should've asked before." He chuckles, making you scrunch your nose at how cutely shy he was.

"No, you're good." Maybe this move wouldn't be so bad after all.

"I'm Jeongin." He slides on his glasses before holding out his hand for a quick shake.

"Y/N."

"Cool. I don't think I've seen you around here before."

"Around Brigham?" He nods. "Oh well, yeah. I went to Chaminade for undergrad."

"Ouuu, Chaminade's nice. Why the change?"

"Hm, one of my professors started working here and offered me a position in his lab."

"Wow, that's awesome. You're pretty set then." You giggle and shrug.

"I wouldn't say that just yet." You look at his notebook, watching as he jots the date down neatly. "So, you've attended Brigham since freshman year?" He nods.

"Sure have. I love it here." He gives you a toothless smile.

"Seeing a lot of familiar faces?"

"Some, not a whole lot though—" At this point, the professor walks in, setting her stuff alongside the front desk before booting up her laptop and getting her slide deck onto presentation mode through the projection.

"Class, hello hello. I'm Dr. Kuo, I'll be your professor for Advanced Molecular Biotechnology." Her eyes dart from the class to the individual who walks in a bit after her introduction. You can't help but stare a bit at him as he quietly walks in with his head hung low; black hair to the length of his neck, beautiful pale skin and plush, pink lips. He doesn't really look at his surroundings even though most eyes fall on him as he heads to the back of the classroom. You look over your shoulder, watching as he lets his bag fall to the ground before slouching in his seat. "Please be on time for class, as I'll be starting our agenda right away." She's pretty much directing her remark to him, but he doesn't budge. Instead, he takes out a notebook and pen, then rests his cheek on his fist.

"I'd hate to be on her bad side." Jeongin whispers to you, even though he pays no attention to the individual that just got settled into class. Almost like he knew him, like this was a natural, day to day occurrence.

"Is she mean?"

"I heard a few things about her. She takes awhile to warm up and is pretty harsh with her quizzes, tests, even grading projects." He pushes his glasses up his nose a bit, squinting at the projector screen.

"Mm, we'll see. It is the master's program, after all. I shouldn't even be surprised." He quickly looks at you with a smile before jotting down notes. The rest of the class is pretty standard, with you and Jeongin pairing up for some partner work towards the last half of class. You find out he's the middle child, having a younger brother in elementary school and an older brother— two years older, as matter of fact. He's super easy to work with and is incredibly patient after all the questions you've thrown his way during the partner activity. It may be early, but you were already considering Jeongin to be someone you could get close to while you were here, especially being that you were in the same program together.

It would be nice to have that while you were away from home. You had to remind yourself it wasn't too far, but it also wasn't easy for you to go home every single weekend. Not with your upcoming schedule already being packed with classes and work. Can't forget the help you've promised the family you live with.

"What's your next class?" Jeongin tugs on his bag strap while he walks alongside of you out of the building.

"Advanced biochemistry." He does a slight head tilt.

"I have the later class. I'm off to lab."

"Where's lab at?"

"Hale Center. It's where most of our labs and science classrooms are." He chuckles. "Well, except this one. Pretty sure advanced biochemistry is there, yeah?" You nod.

"It is."

"Cool. I'll walk with you till we have to part ways." The two of you continue to engage in small talk until you reach the middle point of campus, where most students are at— either making their way to on-campus dorms, the dining hall, library or other nearby buildings for class. It's much livelier around these parts, Jeongin already greeting a few familiar faces as you walk to the other end where Hale Center is located.

"Jeongin!" He looks up ahead of him, waving at a friend coming towards you two.

"Changbinnie." He teases, making the other laugh. Alongside of him was Felix, to your surprise, making you smile and wave at him as well. "What's up, dude?"

"Just going to my last class, what about you?"

"Got lab." He responds.

"Loser." Changbin responds, making Jeongin pinch his bicep. "Ah, hey, this is Felix." Jeongin laughs, putting his hand out to shake Felix's.

"This is Y/N. Y/N, Changbin, Fe—"

"Felix." You call for him softly.

"You survived class." He laughs.

"Nice, you two know each other?"

"He helped me get to class earlier." You turn your attention to Changbin. "It's nice to meet you though, Changbin."

"Same to you." He smiles. "Hey, I'm gonna go to the library and get some work done later. You down?"

"Since when do you go to the library?"

"Shut up. New year, new me." Jeongin laughs.

"Maybe, I'll let you know." Changbin nods.

"You guys are welcome to come too, if you want! The more the merrier." You and Felix smile with a small shrug.

"Thanks. I might take you up on that if work doesn't go overtime for me." You all say your goodbyes and part ways for the time being, the walk falling silent until Jeongin chimes in again.

"Already going to work?"

"Yuuuup."

"Well, you should definitely come meet up with us afterwards anyway."

"I'll try to. It'd be nice to get a head start on things, anyway." He hands you his phone as the both of you stand inside Hale Center's main lobby. You give him a toothless smile, grabbing his phone to plug in your number. When you hand it back to him, he fiddles with it for a minute before you feel the vibration of your own phone in your pocket.

"That's me." He smiles. "Let me know if you'll come meet us."

"Okay."

"See you later, maybe? Have fun in class and work!" He starts to walk backwards, waving enthusiastically before he darts up the steps to his lab room.

Your day goes by pretty smoothly, with you darting off to Dr. Kreher's lab as soon as you finish off your last class of the day. Surprisingly, he's in the lab, mainly because he wants to show you where things are and where the shared supply room was at. He also informs you that he'll be taking on an undergraduate class, so he'll need some help printing out the syllabus to hand out, plus stocking extra supplies in his lab alone just so he has everything in one place. You happily agree to help him as you toss in your lab coat and wipe down the UV hood, immediately getting started on your usual routine. So now, not only were you in charge of running this malaria study with him, but now, you'd be helping him out with his undergraduate students.

You'd for sure be busy for quite some time. You wondered when the next time you could go home would be.

When Dr. Kreher leaves you to your peace, you work under the hood for a couple of hours until you have some down time while you wait for your stained slides to dry. You take this opportunity to print extra copies of the syllabus just as he asked before running to the storage room next door. You grab a couple of supplies from the list he handed over and drag them back to the lab, arranging it neatly along the shelves and countertops. By the time you were finished helping him get ready for class, your slides were ready to be examined under the microscope. It took you a couple of minutes to check out your samples, determining next steps and acting appropriately before wiping everything down and shutting the hood down for the night. You sigh, the clock already hitting 8pm as you hang your labcoat onto the rack and grab your things. You swiftly exit the lab, grabbing your phone to text Jeongin to see if they were still at the library.

However, you felt yourself crash into another body before you could even hit send, the sound of disposable pipette packs and paper towel rolls hitting the floor in front of you.

"Oh my god, I am soooo sorry." You crouch down to grab the pack of pipettes, but a large hand snatches it from the ground before you can even try to help out. "Let me help—"

"Jeez. I got it." He says with an attitude. You look up at him when you stand, realizing it's the same guy who had walked in late to Dr. Kuo's class. He looks at you with his brows furrowed, removing an airpod from his right ear. "Wanna watch where you're going next time?" He plugs his airpod back into his ear before snatching the roll of paper towels on the floor.

"Sorry." You mutter softly. He simply brushes past you to the supply room. You stand there, feeling a bit awkward and upset at the interaction, but you brush it off to finally send the text to Jeongin.

You quietly tug on your bag strap as you step out of Hale Center and follow the signs that would lead you to the library. It was bigger than you imagined, your feet automatically bringing you to the loud section of the library. There were tables lined along the middle, sandwiched in between the aisles and aisles of books. You catch sight of Jeongin towards the back end, Changbin sitting next to him with Felix in front. He sees you as his eyes scan the library, eyes turning into half crescents as he smiles and waves you over.

"Hey." You say as you approach the table, slipping into the seat next to Felix.

"Oh hey!" Felix and Changbin say, scooting their things over to make room for you.

"How was work?" Jeongin asks.

"It was alright, I guess." You take out your laptop and start logging into the student portal to see if there were any introductory assignments you needed to get done for the rest of your classes this week.

"You guess? Bad day already?" Changbin teases.

"No, everything was fine. I just—" You look at them and shake your head, afraid to spill too much on the first day. Not that you felt like Changbin, Felix or Jeongin would judge you for being upset over such a small interaction, but you felt the need to suppress it anyway; like you shouldn't sound like a complainer or a brat on the first day of school, even if that wasn't your intention. "I'm just tired."

"I'm sure." Felix says. "You shouldn't work yourself too much for the rest of the night."

"I won't. I'm just going to see if there's anything else I need to do for the rest of my classes." They nod. "How was today for you guys?" Changbin nods.

"Honestly? Pretty boring." He chuckles. "But, at the same time, I can already sense the stress coming. So, I'll take what I can get for now."

"Yeah, that." Jeongin laughs.

"We should go to more social events together during grad school." Changbin adds.

"Did you guys not go to a lot during undergrad?"

"I did, this dude didn't."

"It gets overwhelming, okay." Jeongin chuckles. "People just get sloppy and weird." He puts his hand out as he corrects himself. "Not everyone, but most."

"I get that."

"It's because of that one party, huh?" Changbin looks at him and laughs. "Fuuuuck."

"Shut up." Jeongin's cheeks turn a faint red.

"What happened?" Changbin continues to laugh while Jeongin sighs.

"Some girl that had a crush on me got really drunk at a party, threw herself on me then tried to kiss me before she threw up." Jeongin visibly cringes. "Some of it got on my jeans before I moved out of the way." He fake cries. "Those were my favorite jeans."

"Oh shit." Felix says.

"I'm sorry." You make a face. "Understandably overwhelming."

"Ah, no biggie now. I would just prefer to not deal with throw up on my jeans again." He looks at Changbin. "But, if Felix and Y/N are down, I'll go."

"Yeah, that sounds fun." Felix responds. You continue to work amongst yourself, your eyes glancing around the library from time to time when the library gets a little nosier than usual. The last glance you take, you catch sight of that same black-haired individual heading down an aisle nearby, grabbing a book and heading back to the front to check out. You didn't catch yourself staring with a certain expression plastered on your face, but Jeongin does, and he can't help but scrunch his nose before giving off a small laugh.

"Do you not like him or something?"

"Huh? Who?"

"Hyunjin." So that's his name.

"Is that his name?"

"You're looking at the guy that walked late into Dr. Kuo's class, right?" You nod. "Yeah, that's Hyunjin."

"Hyunjin as in Hwang Hyunjin?" Changbin adds in this certain tone. "He's a weird one." Now, they both look at you. "Why, what about him?"

"Nothing." You shrug.

"You think he's cute?" Jeongin chuckles as he teases you. You're not gonna lie, the dude is attractive as hell. Tall as hell. Built right as hell. Attitude, though? Hard pass.

"Aw babe, save it for a guy who would really appreciate it. He's not gonna budge." Changbin chimes in before you can even respond to Jeongin's question. "We've known him since undergrad and dude barely says a word to anyone."

"Hm, he's just quiet." Jeongin says.

"Doesn't mean he's weird, though. Maybe he just likes to keep to himself, or maybe he's quiet in general." Felix says to soften the conversation.

"No, he's weird, alright. He doesn't say shit, nor does he even try with anyone. Couldn't be me."

"That's cause you're always so fucking loud." Changbin pinches his arm, making him yelp in return. "Ouch, stop! It's true!"

"Anyways." Changbin glares at him before returning his attention to you and Felix. "I say weird because in the beginning, he was pretty talkative and social. He hung around certain people, had a girlfriend at one point. Everyone thought they were the cutest couple on campus. Then, after sophomore year, he just flipped. Now, he's always pretty cold when people talk to him and try to be friendly. And it's crazy, cause I've talked to a few girls who think he's pretty attractive too, but he just brushes it off. He really doesn't try with people anymore."

"Maybe something happened to make him closed off like that." Felix pouts a bit.

"I heard it was because his girlfriend was cheating on him with his own bestfriend." Jeongin furrows his brows.

"Chan?" Changbin nods.

"Yeah, dude. Crazy, huh?"

"Well, we don't even know if it's true."

"I honestly think it is, I don't remember seeing him hanging around with Chan or his girlfriend after that."

"Mm. It's not really our business anyway." You look behind you to see if Hyunjin is still in the library, but he isn't. Even if it were all true, you weren't sure if that was a good enough reason for Hyunjin to act the way he was acting towards other people. You didn't know him though, didn't think you could get to know him, so this— this is what you'll leave it at.

The conversation about Hyunjin dies down after Jeongin responds with it not being anyone's business. You and the boys end up finishing some work and leave the library a bit past 11PM, Jeongin offering to walk you to your car before parting ways with you for the evening. It's a little too late for your family back home, but you decide to send them a text anyway— letting them know about your busy first day and that you're heading home.

It's quiet on your street. You park your car alongside the sidewalk, street light dimly lighting your surroundings. You grab your things and slip through the gate, heading straight to the back of the property where your small in-law studio is nestled. You lock your door and set your things down before getting your kettle going to boil some hot water for a quick bowl of ramen. You get washed up and throw on your pajamas, settling onto your bed with your bowl of ramen and Youtube on your laptop. You didn't realize how hungry you were until you looked down and saw that you had finished every bit of your ramen. You pout to yourself before your phone vibrates off to the side, signaling a text coming in.

Yeah, maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. Maybe, you'd make new friends and make yourself feel at home. But, your mind suddenly flashes to Hyunjin. Even with someone like him, a minor interaction as such, it was easy to bring you back to feeling alone. Still.

Can't win them all, I suppose.

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