#Or at least 'crowd favourite' energy. I also really loved hearing what people thought their vocal styles would be like!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Thank you all for voting in the poll to decide who was going to be the leader of the band! It turned out to be such a close race!

[cluelessbees]

I sadly do not have any presentable wips for today could I interest y'all in part 2 of the Dash and Lily post I made the other day--

***

Blue,

You’re sticking with Notebook Boy? You really are stubborn. But okay, Notebook Boy it is.

I have to warn you. I don’t think I’m as mysterious as you want me to be. The air of mystery really is just the notebook talking. I’m fairly boring otherwise. 

But to answer your question.

I think my music taste also varies but- I really like rock a lot. My brother is where I get my music taste from. He would give me a bunch of mixtapes that he’d make and the music was always so— different and the sound was so addictive. 

I think my favourite song right now is Boys Don’t Cry by The Cure, have you heard it? 

Also, I have to say, your friend makes great music. 

When I first got to the venue I really thought I was like- this weird…outsider. Like- I don’t know….like I didn’t really fit into the crowd there? And I want to pretend like it went away quickly as it came, but it stuck for a while. Which I know is stupid. I’m sorry.

Thankfully, the moment the music start the more I felt it. I felt the energy course through my veins and it was electric and suddenly the music was all I could hear. You somehow managed to drown my thoughts. Kudos to you. 

Tell your friend again I think he’s extremely talented. And if he ever records them on tape I 100% want a copy.

As for you, Blue. I think you need to learn to be less stubborn- let yourself go a bit. You don’t always have to be right, yknow? 

So, I think it’s time for you to be more flexible.

Have you ever done an escape room before? Usually they require a lot of team work and communication. Stubbornness won’t do anything if you don’t listen. 

I’ve devised a team that truly won’t work unless you allow some flexibility. Let’s hope you don’t hate me after this one.

The games at 7pm tomorrow night. Leave the notebook in the first items locker.

Now for my question, 

What’re your thoughts on true love?

I know even you can be a bit cheesy so- I’m praying there’s a bit of a hopeless romantic in you somewhere.

That’s all for now.

Until next time,

Notebook Boy

***

Notebook Boy,

Wow. You were not kidding about this team. You really are a sadist huh? You managed to create my nightmare team. I cant tell if should be happy you know me enough to do that or terrified that you knew how to get on my nerves.

I’ve got to hand it to you. You did manage to make me a bit less stubborn. Only a little though don’t get cocky. It was…very challenging I’ll say- trying to get everyone to listen. Not fun. But we did manage to win! A minute to spare and several hints but we won and I think that’s a point for me.

I’ll have to disagree with you a bit. I don’t think you’re boring. You’re probably one of the coolest people I know. You might think you’re boring but you’re not. Your mind is amazing yknow that? I like being able to read your thoughts. It makes me feel special. 

Don’t call yourself boring alright? I think you should own the name Notebook Boy. Own the mysterious-ness of it all. 

In fact, I think I know your next dare.

There’s a cafe by the old middle school I don’t know if you know it- Uncle Mel’s? Anyways they do poetry slams every weekend. Go to it. Get on stage and make up and identity and do whatever. Be weird be different be you anything. You’re never gonna see these people again so screw it. Make up a character if you want to.

I think you’ll find yourself a bit more interesting afterwards. I’m sure you’ll even steal the hearts of a few boys and girls. (Although hopefully your heart is already reserved)

Anyways, true love. I don’t know what I think really. I’d like to think it’s true. I’d like to think there is such thing as true love and the one and all of that but…part of me doesn’t. Or- we’ll that’s not true.

I think most of me thinks it’s not true or— at least has accepted it. But…part of me wants it to be true- hopes it I guess. Like, hopes that will one day I’ll see the one and it all clicks yknow? It feels childish admitting that. 

Also. Don’t apologise. You don’t have to apologise for feeling like an outsider. It’s okay.. I feel that way too. It’s not stupid. I hope you at least feel less of an outside now? Either because of the show or….or me? I don’t know.

Now for my question, I think…I want to know…do you play DnD? If so, what’s your class? 

I’m a paladin. (Maybe you’ve guessed that considering how well you know me) 

Enjoy the poetry slam (leave the notebook with the barista with the name tag Max)

Yours,

Blue 

[balladtv]

hi, me again, u sounded so enthusiastic in your answer and your reply to my comment so i just had to ask : what was finsbury like for u? and go into detail, i just love to talk and hear about it so HIT ME WITH ALL THE THOUGHTS

THE THOUGHTS ARE THOUGHT-ING LIKE THEY’VE NEVER THOUGHT BEFORE. thank you so much for taking interest in my over-explained enthusiastic ramblings — I again apologise well in advance.

I also just want to preface incase anyone stumbles over this post, this is about my experience personally, and I recognise not everyone would’ve had the same experience as me. nether the less, everything shall be under the cut if you care to give it a read :)

okay, so I’ll start off by giving my experience getting into finsbury. we took the tube (and ran into another ‘75 fan on the way) and commuting was pretty easy (we were staying just outside of london, took us just over an hour to get to the park) and we got there just before 11am. if I remember correctly, I believe we were the second group of people to get into the holding area because of the concern of the crowd going onto the street, and from there it was pretty chill and the security that we ran into were all amazing and up for a laugh! the waiting did suck as they prolonged opening the gates but not much you can do about that, safety over everything!

as soon as we got in we ran to merch, grabbed a t-shirt and some scran and situated ourselves a row behind middle right pitch barrier — very happy with our spot (will include a video at the bottom) and the people around us were lovely.

onto the music!

After Life I thought were really good at opening and definitely got the crowds attention, kept thanking everyone for turning up early to see their set and it was appreciated. a very good performance overall!

Pretty Sick I admittedly did not pay that much attention too, although I don’t want that to be taken negatively, as it dawned upon me how many hours we were going to be there for. had to preserve battery lol.

American Football I will also admit was pretty similar, I was very concerned with scranning a milkshake… no regrets.

The Japanese House were the only one other than the 1975 that I would consider myself a pretty big fan of, and I’m pretty sure I cried at least twice. hearing ‘sunshine baby’ live whilst knowing I’d pre-ordered a personally signed copy of ‘in the end it always does’ was magical and amber herself blew me away with their vocals and presence on the stage. can’t wait to see them on tour.

Bleachers were probably my second favourite (not including the 1975) of the night. really great to watch on stage despite not being a fan and the energy the crowd was giving was immense!

Cigarettes After Sex although good, and I did enjoy, did feel a little out of place on the setlist. although I can obviously see why they were the last act before the headline, taking that out of consideration, I would’ve preferred to have watched cas after the japanese house, and then bleachers.

ladies and gentlemen… the 1975!

I don’t even know where to begin when talking about the 1975. from tim healy to people, I genuinely couldn’t have wished for a better show (although the nothing revealed / everything denied stan in me is praying for the day)

the opening. wow. although it was arguably obvious they were going to open with the 1975 (bfiafl), it didn’t make it any less impactful. hearing those chords striking that piano I’m convinced I felt it within my gut. absolutely breathtaking — and it set a high standard that was carried out throughout the entire night, completely electrifying.

to talk about the first ‘surprise’ of the night — ‘love me’. although I do preach being an abiior stan, iliwys also has a special place in my heart, ‘love me’ being my second favourite (after ballad… yeah) this is when I knew this gig wasn’t going to be topped by anything I’d previously seen!

‘part of the band’ will also get a mention here that despite being a regular on the setlist, reaches deeply into my heart. a tear was shed (and I had no clue what was to come).

“who gives a fuck this is too much fun!” matty’s little speeches honestly kept me going.

tim healy. tim healy singing my favourite song off of bfiafl. I thought I died and went to heaven right there. another crying mark.

also trying to kill me with ‘be my mistake’, this was a block of non stop sobbing.

oh, you thought you died right there?

HERE HAVE BALLAD!!!

at this point I was the luckiest woman ever that the couple we made friends with in-front of us let me swap with him so I was on the middle barrier. kindness from strangers is the best thing ever.

I genuinely don’t even know what to comprehend about ‘medicine’.

and as you can clearly see, having CARLY appear was not easing me down gently at all. doing this post has made me realise how the hell did I get out of there alive??

(I also went feral during ‘the sound’… not one of my proudest moments)

guys snippet… into iawds… as per my last post you can imagine what I was going through. the only thing that was running through my head was “I need to book my box tattoo appointment”

and now to wrap it up, ‘love it if we made it’ and ‘give yourself a try’ (and ‘sex’) being my all-time favourites and were the best way to end the gig…

until the 1975 to literally make me die dead right then and there when I heard the beat to ‘people’.

all in all, despite some people disagreeing, including consumption at the end really solidified the era and drew the door (or tv screen) to a close for one final time. your new era. your old friends.

(p.s the only negative thing I have to say is getting out of the park was an absolute fucking nightmare and made our journey three times longer, but seeing the 1975 definitely made it worth it and I’d do it all again)

[another-fantasy-world]

The Idol’s Inspiration

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Title: The Idol’s Inspiration

Pairing: Valkyrae || Rachell x Fem! Reader

Summary: In which the international singer find’s her inspiration in a certain brown eyed-often screaming- streamer

Warnings: None? Fluff. Awkward Crushing. Top Rae? (Oh Gosh)

Word Count: 2,905 Words

@short-kid27​ helped me with this one. Go check her out she’s actually great

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆      ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

-

You scoffed when you saw what your bandmate tweeted out, tweeting as if he wasn’t using his phone either. Deciding to throw something at him, you spot a plastic perfume bottle, reaching out for it, only for Luna, your other bandmate to slap your hands of her perfume bottle.

“Don’t you dare.” She playfully glares before turning back to her original position, with her hair stylist tending to her long reddish-brown hair.

“Sebastian, you are so lucky you’re on the other side of the room right now or I swear to God, you would have a concussion.” You frowned, before turning back to your phone, further proving Sebastian’s point.

“See?! What are you even doing?” He loudly asks, you barely hearing him from the noise of blowdryers.

“Writing.” You answered, annoyed. It wasn’t a lie tho, You were now writing a new song, since your management once again are rushing you to write at least 12 songs for your new album.

“We wrote 3 songs yesterday. Calm down.” Your bassist, Luna reassured you, who just finished her glams.

“We’re supposed to be finished with this by the end of the month. How am I supposed to calm down?” You complained.

Ever since your band, Coldify, got enough attention, your management barely gave you enough time to just breathe and write like you used to, How were you supposed to produce quality music?

“Choco Milk?” Jace, your drummer offers you his second cup

“No thank you. Hot sweet things stress my throat. Maybe later though.” You stood up, thanking your stylists, before changing into your casual clothes, since you would be doing a Q and A session first as a soundcheck and also for extra fan service before the concert proper.

Once you finished changing, you walked out of your dressing room, only to find that your bandmates are now all set up, all except you.

Jace is fiddling with his drum sticks

Luna is tuning her bass guitar

And Sebastian is playing a random tune on his electric guitar.

You rolled your eyes at them, before slinging your own acoustic guitar over your shoulder, the familiar weight and pressure of it’s strap makes you smile.

“Are we ready guys? We can start now, there’s only 5 minutes left.” You asked them, plugging in your “in-ears”

They all nodded at you and you guys started to do your signature intro, you playing a few notes on your acoustic, followed by Sebastian and Luna, then you all run out, hearing the screams of your fans intensify, before Jace started banging on his drums, ending your intro with all of you guys harmonizing your band name and lifting your right arms up, showing the compass tattooed into the insides of your wrists, symbolizing your band and the friendship that will never grow old.

“What is up LA!?” You loudly said into the mic, chuckling when they screamed louder than your own mic.

“Well, we certainly need to up the mic volume later.” Luna giggled, sitting on one of the chairs positioned in the middle of the stage.

“Mhhmmn. Let’s all calm down first yes? You guys save your energy for later.” Sebastian winked into the crowd, also sitting on one of the chairs, with his mic in his hand.

“Great, great. We’re all settled in, Please sit down and let’s start this 1 and a half hour Q and A? Soundcheck? Fan service? Whatever you want to call this whole shebang.” You joked, thanking the staff that gave you your own water bottle.

“You know the drill, if you don’t that’s fine. My name is Luna and I am the one who plays the amazing silver-gray bass back there.” Luna introduces herself

“That amazing silver-gray bass that you would marry someday. I swear you are inlove with that thing.” Sebastian teased, earning him a loud smack to the shoulder.

“That is animal abuse. Stop it.” You hold in your laugh, but bursted out laughing anyways when you saw the appalled look on his face.

“My name is Jace. And I bang my sticks into a hallow cylindrical thing for a living. I heard they’re called drums but whatever. I also live with these idiots and I, unfortunately, am the one who holds their leashes.” Jace introduces himself, smiling into the crowd

“Okay, Father. My Name is Sebastian. aka the most attractive one in this group. I play the guitarrrrrr. You guys can call me Seb, Sebastian or Daddy. Your choice.” He winked.

“Ew.” All three of you pretended to gagged, before laughing at Sebastian’s pouting face, your audience also laughing at your antics.

“Okay- Okay, Stop. We need to be serious. Gosh. My name’s Y/N! And I’m your local sapphic lead singer. Yes, I need to say that everyday because people still debate that I’m straight. It’s annoying” You introduce, taking a sip of your water

“Right. So this is how it’s gonna work. There are multiple Coldify interrogators, as we call them, roaming around, all you have to do, is raise your hand, first one they see wins the first question. And the cycle continues until we run out of time.” You explained

“HmmHmmn. So are you guys ready?” Luna asks, earning a few “Yes!” and “WHOOOOO” making all you guys chuckle.

“Okaaaay! on 3. 1,2,3! OH! That redhead with the all black attire. I like that.” Sebastian calls, waiting for the guy in the uniform to hand the girl the mic.

“What’s your name love?” Jace asked the now blushing girl

“Ah. Kadie. I just wanna say that I am such a big fan and I wanted to know if, besides the tattoo you guys have right now, the compass, are you guys still planning on getting a matching tattoo?”

“Ooooh. Tattooes. Hmm. I personally would love to have another tattoo. But you see, Sebastian here cried when we first tattoed. And I am not looking forward to that at all.” Luna answered, laughing when Sebastian whined.

“Oh yeah. No. Not again.” Jace agreed, while you just smiled and nodded.

“Next Question Please.” Sebastian interjected before you could even talk

“Hi my name’s Catherine-” You guys interrupted her to say hi

“Hehe. Hi. Uhm, I wanted to know if you guys have like, favourite youtubers or streamers?” She asks shyly, which made you smile.

“Oooooo. Okay, now you guys get to know why I tweeted that earlier.” Sebastian chuckles

“Okay Mr. Snitch. But uhm. I would have to say... Sykkuno. His voice is just the best-”

“Excuse me? Corpse?! Hello? Corpse has the best voice don’t even. He’s my favourite, what you said was just Corpse slander” Sebastian interrupts Luna, to which Luna answered with a glare.

“Uh-huh. Okay. As I was saying, Corpse’s voice is good, but Syk’s is just this wholesome anime type voice that just melt’s your heart you know? He should be a voice actor for like, an anime protagonist. AND HIS PERSONALITY IS SO GOOD AND WHOLESOME LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?” Luna gushes, nodding to Jace before she goes on a full rant

“I’m sure you won’t match with him, expecially since he’s quiet and you’re loud and abnoxious.” Sebastian casually says

“You know what?”

“Pokimane...” Jace speaks into the mic, interrupting the siblings from fighting. “...Because she’s actually a really good gamer, and she also has a cat called called “Mimi” and that’s major points in my book.” Jace says, smiling.

“Hmm. That’s actually a tough choice... I would have to say-” You were interrupted when your phone let out a noise, letting you know you forgot to silent it.

“BABUSHKA!” Your face felt hot as you desperately tried to put your phone in silent, but it was too late.

“My phone just outed me what the hell?” You mumbled into the mic, hiding your face as you hear your fans laugh and coo at your cuteness and embarrassment.

“Anyways, if that didn’t answer your question, I don’t know what will. But uhm, Valkyrae. 100 percent. She’s just really skilled in video games and has probably played more games than me. Also, she’s absolutely fucking gorgeous and I just love her personality and all.” You smiled, still feeling a little bit embarrassed

“I just love her personality- Please, last night you fell asleep to her playing a horror game. She screams alot in that video, I’m just saying. How could you sleep to literally her screaming in your ear?” Sebastian shrugs, ignoring the glares you sent him

“Just this morning, you were frowning because there was another viper on the team Rae was fighting against in Valorant, and you accused that viper of being a copycat.” Jace added

“Or the fact that you always flinch, or dodge and curse whenever someone shoots at Rae-” Luna finishes making you cover her mouth before she says something more

“Okay. I think it’s pretty obvious that I have a crush on Valkyrae but please- Stop.” You grumbled, frowning playfully at your fans when they awed at your band’s interaction.

“Next Fucking Question Please.” You huffed, closing your eyes and leaning back into your seat, trying to settle your beating heart

Rae will for sure see that. Oh my god. Thoughts of Rae seeing your clip of literally simping for her has your heart running marathons.

“Hi! Uhm, this question is for Y/N”

You hear the gasps of your bandmates, but you pay no attention to it since you were still gay panicking inside

“What will you do if you ever met Valkyrae in person?” a familiar voice echoed in your ears, you of course can’t figure out who it is.

“I honestly don’t know how I would react. Maybe faint? But then probably hug her? I dunno? Kiss her cheek maybe? I mean, how would you react if you meet your long time crush?” You answered mindlessly, chuckling silently knowing that you probably faint and be knocked out for God knows how long. Or maybe you’d fumble and embarrass yourself.

You hear your bandmates join in the laughter with the audience, and that made you open your eyes, throwing a confused glace to Luna who just patted your back and made eye contact with who, you presume, asked the question.

You followed her gaze, eyes widening when you saw the brown-eyed brunette beauty holding the mic. Your brain lagged, trying to comprehend the situation.

“Uhm, I mean- Unless, You know? She’s uncomfortable about it. I don’t wanna make her uncomfy, you get me? First impressions are a thing. I mean- I’m just gonna shut up.” You just spat words out before your brain could even comprehend it.

Come on Y/N keep it together. She gotta think that you’re cool. Not an awkward gay mess.

“Pfft- Little too late for the first impressions that included you being cool.” Jace threw his empty water bottle at you

“...I said that aloud didn’t I?” You asked, now trying to hide your face behind Luna’s back, who’s doubling over from laughter

“Please, someone tag me when you decide to upload this very moment. I wanna blackmail Y/N with it.” Sebastian wheezed out.

“I think we can do something with the hugging thing. Just don’t faint on me.” Your eyes snapped to Rae’s as you see the smirk etched on her face, her hands still holding the microphone

Your eyes widen as your fans, screamed and a series of “OOOOOOHHHH” and “Get it Y/N!” erupted, making your embarrassment amplify even more.

“Is it embarrass Y/N day today? God, please- Next Question please. Oh Jesus.” You put your face in your hands, trying to hide.

Thankfully, they didn’t pry anymore, your embarrassment slowly subsiding as they asked about your daily life, career, albums and upcoming awards. After finishing a couple more questions, you guys sang a couple cover songs, and that’s what concluded your soundcheck. (Sebastian managed to sneak in Janet’s PETTY song, which you rolled your eyes on but sang nonetheless.)

You walked out and to the backstage as you shoved Sebastian playfully for making kissy faces.

“Y/N and Rachell sitting on a tree-” He was suddenly cut off by someone

“K-I-S-S-I-N-G” Your gaze wonders to Pokimane, or Imane who just interrupted Sebastian

“Kissing?! Isn’t it a bit too early for that? Why would they kiss-” Sykkuno says glancing between Rae and I

You wondered if they said anything else because you’re going to be honest to yourself, you were only looking at Rae’s eyes. The deep brown orbs you only ever saw through your screen, was now staring right back at you, her brunette hair tied up in a bun- She’s staring back at you.

Quickly averting your eyes, you felt yourself grow shy, you now also find your shoes very attractive.

“Keep your head up or else you would faint on me and I don’t want that. I prefer to hug a conscious person, Thank you very much.” you lifted your head so fast you could’ve given yourself a whiplash. Darting your eyes around Rae, you quickly find that your friends + Imane and Sykkuno have left the both of you alone.

“Sorry. You just caught me off guard there. Hi! Uhm. I really don’t know what to say to you- Uhm.” You rub the back of your neck, nervously smiling at Rae you in turn smirked at you, raising her brow in the process.

She quietly chuckles before opening her arms, signaling for a hug, to which you launched yourself in, trying not to breathe because that would be so weird.

“Okay so now can you take out your knife and stab me just to make sure that this is real.” You stated, looking directly into her eyes

“...But I’m not the Impostor?”

“...Okay that’s clever-” You laughed, taking a sip out of your water bottle, leading her to your dressing room

“Speaking of, do you mind if I play with you guys sometimes? I’ll find time, I promise.” You say, watching the time considering you only have half an hour to change and get ready, not to mention your crush is right in front of you as well.

“Wait really? Yeah! Just DM me on twitter! I’ll organize a lobby just for you.” She replies, plopping herself on the sofa you have.

“Awe, I feel so... special” You smiled, finally composing yourself, emerging from behind the curtains, already in your performance outfit

“The almighty Creator of the Year, creating a lobby? For lil ol m-” You were greeted with a facefull of pillows thrown at you, just for that statement. Which made you laugh.

“Shut up.” She grinned

“I’m sorry, m’lady” You curtsied playfully, expecting her to start smacking your shoulders, instead when you lifted your head up, she was just sitting there with a soft smile on her face.

“You’re wearing my merch.” She stated

You widened your eyes then looked down, the hoodie that you just randomly picked up was her merch.

“I’m sorry, do you want it back?” You spit the words out before your mind could comprehend how idiotic that sounded

Rae bursted out laughing at your statement, putting her hand over her mouth while doubling over. You rolled your eyes at her and plopped down on the sofa, crossing your arms.

“Yeah, Yeah. Go on. Laugh. At least I can spell broccoli right.” You teased, poking her side

“OKAY! LISTEN HERE HOTSHOT! I-”  she was interrupted by a series of knocks on the door.

“Y/N! PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE DECENT AND IS NOT SEDUCING RAE BECAUSE THAT’S JUST WRONG” Sebastian loudly asked through the door

“Oh My God. Please just kill me.” You rubbed your face with your hands

“I’m pretty sure I’ll be the one doing the seducing but okay.” You hear her mumble under her breath, making you look at her with a scandalized look on your face

“DOOR’S UNLOCKED SEBASTIAN. DON’T BE AN IDIOT..” You replied

“Don’t mind him Y/N We’re just coming in to say that you have 5 minutes until we have to go onstage.” Luna softly replies, shoving Sebastian out your field of view.

“I’ll be right there Lune.” You stood up, smiling at Rae

“I guess that’s it. I’ll talk to you later? I think? Just check your DM’s soon yeah?” She pulls you into a hug, kissing your cheek as she pulls away.

“Good Luck out there. I know you’ll do great.” She smiles, walking out, leaving you to your thoughts

“Huh?” You touched your cheek, a smile slowly paints itself upon your face

"Come on, lovergirl we're running late." Jace drapes his arm around your shoulder

"She kissed my cheek." You say, still shocked

"Lucky You." Jace says, his ears reddening.

...lucky bastard

"POKI KISSED YOU TOO DIDN'T SHE?!" You screeched

'Hush!" His cheeks are also red now.

"Huh. I guess today's our lucky day." You grinned, now extremely happy and hyped

"Oh, check your e-mail now by the way. Manager says she sent our line up there." he pats your back, getting into his position, as best as he can considering the stage is now pitch black

"Huh. Okay." You pulled out your phone, sending a piece of paper flying. Bending down to pick it up, you feel your heart soften into mush and then it decides to run another marathon.

Just incase my Twitter DM's don't work, or if I'm streaming. xx 09-xxx-xxx-xxx

"Be still, my beating heart." You sighed out

Valkyrae just gave you her phone number

[donaidk]

Looking at me - Arthur Leclerc

Thank you so much for requesting! I already had an idea in my head for something like this and you just gave that last push! It was my first time writing in third person, and I really-really need the practice. Still I hope you will enjoy this 😀🧡 Have a great weekend everyone!

Inspiration song

Masterlist | Taglist/Queue | Request

Getting a chance to walk a well known fashion show at the age of 19 was a huge step in her career. She had jobs and photoshoots all the time, but everyone knew that you’re becoming a name in the industry when well known brands ask you to model for them. She already had a photoshoot with one of them a year ago, but having that break since then and now made her think she probably wouldn’t make it into the real fashion world. However, after Alpha Tauri gave her a chance thanks to Pierre, she was contacted by a well known brand just days after the release of the pictures and they asked her to attend their show at the end of the year. Having the promise of such a big show got her through every harder moment throughout the year and she felt like December couldn’t turn up quick enough.

Luckily as it was well after the end of the season for Pierre he could attend with their parents and siblings. She couldn’t even imagine going through something like this without them. Y/N used her last two guest seats to invite both Charles and Arthur. They were friends of their family and she knew Charles was into fashion and would always take the opportunity to attend shows. He probably could have bought tickets to it himself, but it wasn’t the same as being invited by someone who worked for the company that time. It was also probably the only way to make it seem less strange that Y/N would have liked Arthur to attend. No one asked questions why he was there if he came with his brother. There’s no easier way to do it.

The two of them were quite good friends, as they spent most of their childhood together and later could connect over being younger siblings to well known athletes. It was probably easier for her as she at least went her own way while Arthur was following in Charles’ footsteps, exactly. He was a talented driver, but people and the media always loved to compare the brothers, always bringing down at least one of them even though they were never really in the same championship or position at the same time. They usually talked at least weekly, but after harder races or attacks from the media either Y/N reached out to him or the other way around. It was just easy to support each other as they understood each other’s challenges and hardships. They couldn’t complain though, as both had family and other friends who supported them in their careers and personal lives also.

“ They’re outside. ” Pierre’s voice got her to jump in her chair a little before Y/N took in what he said. “ I’ll get them to the seats and we will meet after the show, yeah? ” He asked, taking the passes from the table next to her. She knew they wouldn’t have time for her to greet their friends and get back here in time.

“ Yeah, thank you. Enjoy. ” Y/N nodded with a grin before getting a kiss on her cheek from him. “ I’m gonna try not to trip. ” She added with a chuckle before he left, watching as he closed the door after himself while she could still hear him laugh. She leaned back in her seat as everything was already done for the show, and it was now just minutes until the start of the show.

She finally chose a photo from the morning when we arrived at the avenue, to share it on her story. Making sure it uploaded fine she could see Arthur’s profile picture in the bottom left, telling her that he already saw it, making her smile immediately. Y/N sent him a quick selfie with her eyes closed and holding up a peace sign as the grin still didn’t leave her face. She was just about to put her phone down when he sent one back, mimicking her pose and making her laugh out loud. He did look silly and seeing Pierre so confused in the background of it just made it even better. She wanted to respond but then had to leave when they were calling her name from the hallway. With one last deep breath she fixed her hair in the mirror before leaving the dressing room and following all the girls to the backstage.

She felt like an anxious mess right until it was her turn and had to step out onto the stage as they counted down for her from the sideline. She made sure her dress wasn’t in the way of her steps, although knew they practiced for any possible outcome and knew she would manage even in a dodgy situation. Her heart was beating so loud Y/N wouldn’t have been surprised if the people watching the show could hear it over all the music and talking. She still tried to look cool on the outside, her grin not faltering for one bit as she walked down the length of the stage stopping at the end and turning for the cameras. Her way back was a bit more relaxed already, knowing she did her job and just had to get back from where they started. She had one more dress at the end of the show but that seemed a lot easier after such a smooth sailing first appearance. The second one felt like a treat for a job well done and she was ecstatic as she changed into her outfit for the after party. Her body felt sore from all the excitement and then adrenaline that already left. However, her mind was still running and looking forward to the night as she went to the lobby where she knew the others would be waiting for her.

“ You looked stunning out there, Y/N! ” Charles greeted her with a tight hug, making her chuckle quietly. Stepping back from his embrace the next ones were Pierre and her family before Y/N could finally turn to Arthur, not forgetting about him in any way.

“ Thank you for coming. ” Y/N said before hugging him, although it was something that was for his brother too, not just him. “ Hope you’re not too tired yet. We have a long night ahead of us. ” She let out another laugh after letting go of him but she didn’t even get to step away too much before he held up a bouquet of blooming flowers.

“ Just a little congratulatory present. Wanted to give it to you prior to the show, but that didn’t really work out. ” He said with a little blush creeping up onto his cheeks, as she took the flowers from his hands, immediately smelling them.

“ Thank you, they’re beautiful. ” Her eyes were still fixed on the bunch of them, taking in how sweet it was of Arthur. It was made from all of her favourite types of flowers, not missing any from the short list she could make up in her head. “ I’ll make sure they get home safe. Wouldn’t want to kill them at the club. ” Y/N let out a little laugh, turning to her mum while they exited the building together.

Luckily her family offered to take her things back home while they went straight to the venue of the after party. Her other siblings went home too after some last minute hugs, leaving the four of them to be the only ones to attend. There were cars that took the guests to the rooftop bar that was decorated perfectly for the occasion. The moon was shining onto the balcony, but there were also lights running over them, making sure everything was visible and people wouldn’t trip over each other or the few steps around the bar and dancefloor. It was the perfect setting for a party that was relaxed but at the same time a true after party, where everyone could let out their pent up energy and adrenaline from the show.

Minutes after they left the elevator, that took them to the floor of the balcony, they were already standing next to a table with their drinks on it. They were watching the crowd dancing just inches away from them while discussing the day. Pierre and Charles were deep into  one of their usual disagreements about their past season, making Y/N shake her head. It wouldn’t have been them if they got through a day spent together without a silly argument. That would have been too easy. She has been watching the crowd blocking out the bickering coming from next to her, gathering courage to join the dancing even though she never backed off being the center of attention it wasn’t the same with strangers. She knew just a few people from here, almost half of it being the ones she invited herself.

“ A dance? ” She turned to Arthur in the end when she could see that his glass was empty. He froze for a second, looking around them. “ You don’t have to, but I would rather turn deaf from the loud music than them roasting each other. ” She chuckled, cocking her head towards her brother and Charles standing across them. She took the last sip of her drink and was about to get into the crowd when Arthur nodded and putting down the glass from his hand was ready to follow her.

“ I’m not a big dancer, I’m warning you. ” Arthur sighed, but wouldn’t have denied himself the chance to spend some time with her in a more private setting. They never mentioned anything about stepping up their friendship, but that didn’t mean they never thought about separately, in their own heads. 

Y/N took his hand with a grin, pulling him towards the dance floor, weaving through the people standing close, leaving them a sliver of space to navigate their way. They had to stop a few times people stumbling in their way or bumping into them while they were getting closer to their destination. Y/N saw two of the girls she knew a bit better, and decided it will be better to be with friends than alone. Arthur greeted them, quickly introducing himself and even though they were already safe, standing in a less crowded space, in the moment Y/N didn’t let go of his hand while they enjoyed the music and the company. Arthur did take part in the dancing, although several of his moves ended up making them laugh and him blush a little although it never made him stop. He was happy to be the source of their joy for the night.

A few songs later Arthur excused himself from the group to get a drink for himself, while the girls stayed in the same position. Y/N spotted a few guys just seconds after he left, watching them, and approaching their group as soon as Arthur was out of the view. They were quite rude, not caring about how the girls tried to ignore them and get them to leave finally. Y/N was about to just leave and not even look back when she felt a hand come around her waist. Without looking up at the owner of the hand she got to know who was standing behind her by just the voice.

“ I think you should search for another company. The ladies aren’t interested. ” Arthur informed the intruders and by knowing him for years, Y/N could tell he was really focusing on the pronunciation. He seemed serious, like never before and it did the trick, getting the guys to turn around and leave mumbling some swears in his way.

“ Thank you! For both. ” Y/N smiled up at their saviour, taking the half full glass from his hand as he held it out for her. Arthur just shrugged his shoulders, relaxing his shoulders and taking a sip from his drink.

What they didn’t see was Pierre and Charles paying close attention to their group from afar. Her brother still had his fists clenched but he was slowly letting up as the situation got resolved and the younger ones could continue enjoying the party and drinks. Looking at each other they agreed with a sigh at being glad Arthur was there with them and helped them get out of a sticky situation. From the outside they did see how the younger Leclerc and Y/N were around each other, although neither of them wanted to push them towards a goal. It seemed simple, inevitable, but they wanted them to find their own way. It wasn’t rare that the only possible way wasn’t the best way in the end. Meaning, even if they looked compatible for an outsider, it was possible that a relationship between them wouldn’t be long-lived.

They stayed until their legs felt sore from dancing and standing around, and their minds were in a comfortable fuzzy state from the few drinks they got. The night wasn’t young anymore when they got into a taxi, heading for Pierre’s apartment that had enough space for all four of them. They all took turns in the shower and decided on who will sleep and where. There was only one guest bedroom and in the end Charles gladly gave it up to Y/N saying she was the one who worked today, taking the couch with a duvet and a pillow. She was about to just go and finally get a chance to fall asleep, when Arthur stepped out of the bathroom now in his pajamas. For a second she debated if she should just let him sleep on the other couch or maybe act on her idea.

“ We can share the bed if you would like. It's big enough for two people. ” She offered in the end, with a shy smile, pointing towards the bedroom down the hallway. “ I promise I won’t snore. Unlike Charl. ” Y/N let out a quiet laugh, making sure the mentioned brother didn’t hear it and wouldn’t try to get back at her for it.

Arthur had to agree with a sigh that sleeping in the same room as her brother, would have been on the same level as some late torture methods. He couldn’t really deny the offer, taking his things as they wished goodnight to the others and walked down to the bedroom. Within seconds they were both under the duvet, managing to share it and not pull it off the other one. They did start out quite far away from each other, but Y/N couldn’t be fed up when she woke up in the middle of the night to an arm draping over her waist. It grounded her while she had to get used to her surroundings and helped her get back to her dream right until the delicious smell of lunch got them back to reality around midday. They shared a moment, gazes locking, before getting out of bed with grins on their faces, both deciding to push the conversation to another time. At least until lunch, as Y/N’s stomach grumbled as soon as she was standing next to the bed.

[mystic-deep]

"Sensei said girls love swans." | Okkotsu Yuuta x fem!reader

♡ ♡ ♡ description: Just a small box of chocolates, bought on a whim, gifted for no apparent reason. Or so you say.

♡ ♡ ♡ warnings: none, good bad advices from Gojo.

♡ ♡ ♡ notes: I'm working on three other stories with Nanami, Gojo and Toji but had to write something for best boy Yuuta. We're getting volume 0 animated! This was done at the speed of light so please forgive any errors.

♡ ♡ ♡ word count: 2.29 k

Valentine’s Day was quite a surprise this year. You didn’t expect the world to just revert back to old habits so soon, but then again you understood the craving for what was once considered normal. More than a year had passed since the Shibuya incident and with Gojo Satoru finally being released from his prison, things were slowly calming down.

Two major changes came as a result of the near annihilation of Tokyo, one was that now the world was aware of the existence of curses and two was the high number of people that had awoken cursed energy. What were once empty classrooms and training grounds of the Jujutsu Tokyo High School, were now filled with first year students ready to learn from the best. Although the older generation was composed of just a handful of students, they were really the top of the Jujutsu world.

All of your senpais were impressive in their own right so all of them had gathered quite a following of first years. The most popular, by far, was Fushiguro Megumi, the one that possessed the Ten Shadows Technique of the Zen’in clan. A lethal combination of looks, power and status, or so your classmates claimed.

On the opposite end of the spectrum was the third year Okkotsu Yuuta. He was a rare sight on campus and whenever he was present he didn’t interact much with any of the first years. The first time you’ve met him was during a group mission where he was there to supervise. The curse ended up being a special grade and if Yuuta hadn’t jumped in to help you, you’d all be dead. You still remember the bitterness of your classmates when he offered his feedback. Clearly he was right on all points but he didn’t honey glazed any of his words. That incident had caused a string of nasty rumours to spread and everyone in your class began to avoid him as much as possible. You guessed no one was in a hurry to offer him any gifts today.

As for yourself, you tagged along with some of the girls from your class as they chose the best chocolates for their favourite senpais. You didn’t have anyone you really wanted to gift them to, so you bought a small box purely for selfish reasons.

You headed back to campus and as you approached the training grounds you noticed that a small crowd of students were already gathered there. In the middle of them stood Megumi whose arms could barely hold the large number of gifts he had received. The deadpan expression on his face made it clear he wasn’t enjoying the attention.

“You girls better hurry, Megumi-kun looks like he has reached his limit.”

Turning around you were greeted by Gojo who was also carrying quite an impressive quantity of Valentine’s gifts.

“Sensei is really popular.”

“Please don’t sound so surprised.”

As your little conversation went on, your friends quickly abandoned you in order to join the crowd.

“Not gonna join them?” You shook your head as your hands tighten on the handle of your backpack where your box of chocolates was hiding.

“I didn’t buy any chocolates...I mean I did buy chocolates just not for...I should probably head to class.” Feeling too ashamed to admit your selfish purchase, you hurried down the path to the main entrance before Gojo could question you further.

Just as you were about to reach your destination you suddenly noticed a figure not too far from you. Yuuta was strolling along the same path and his expression was not a happy one. Your earlier guess must have been correct judging by his slumped shoulders. Now you never truly worried yourself with his well being, but it just felt so incredibly unfair that he was marginalized like this. At the end of the day, even if he wasn’t easy to talk to, he was a responsible senpai who wouldn’t hesitate to jump in to help others when needed. With that thought in mind, you quickened your pace and called out to him.

“Okkotsu-senpai! Okkotsu-senpai, please wait!”

He stopped in his track and turned to look at you with a surprised expression.

“Y/n-chan, are you okay?”

You nodded as you caught up with him, impressed that he even bothered to remember your name, and opened your backpack to retrieve the box of chocolates.

“For you senpai, Happy Valentine’s Day!” You gave him the most sincere smile you could muster and handed him the small box. Oh well, better for your cavities you suppose.

With a trembling hand he took the small gift and grinned from ear to ear. “Thank you! I’ll treasure it!” It was just a box of cheap chocolates, you thought, definitely not worth the excitement.

“Urm I’m happy you like them. Anyway, have a good day, see you around!” You practically dashed to your classroom, cheeks red from embarrassment. You didn’t know why you were so nervous or why that silly grin of his made you so flustered.

As you sat down at your desk, you wondered if you did the right thing. You didn’t want him to believe you had feelings for him and you also hoped he didn’t think you did it out of pity. You just thought it was the right thing to do at that time and it was just a small gesture, definitely not worth a second thought.

Or so you hoped until White Day arrived and you found quite a surprising gift on your desk that morning. A large bouquet of roses, there must have been over a hundred. No note though, as if the person that had left them just expected for you to know whom they were from.

You could hear the whispers of your classmates and you shifted uncomfortably. You weren’t really popular, no reasons for someone to give you such an impressive present, so of course rumours began to spread.

As you sat on a bench during lunch break with the bouquet in your lap, you raked up your brain trying to figure out who would offer you flowers.

“Oh no, you don’t like them!”

Yuuta’s voice brought you back to reality and you blinked ever so slowly as you looked at his worried expression. Your eyes dropped to the red roses in your lap and then back to your senpai that was just a few feet away from the bench you were sitting.

“These...these are from you?” Well you did gift him that box of chocolates and this was White Day, technically he was supposed to return the gift. Still, a cheap box of bonbons couldn’t compare to the expensive bouquet that he had gifted back.

“Gojo-sensei said you’re supposed to buy something impressive in order to show your appreciation for the gift you received. I didn’t know what you liked and he suggested roses, he said all girls loved red roses.”

Of course it was Gojo Satoru, it was always Gojo Satoru.

“Senpai, thank you, but this is too much! Those chocolates weren’t really that expensive.”

“No, no, they were pretty good! I ended up eating the whole box! Gojo-sensei tried to steal one away, that didn’t end up well for him.” Good, you thought, he deserved it for unnecessarily complicating things.

“Well if you say so, then I’m happy. I’ve never received flowers before, well my father bought me a bouquet when I graduated middle school but I don’t think that counts.”

“I’ve never received chocolates before, so I guess we’re both at the beginning.” The beginning of what, you wondered, as he offered you a somewhat sly smile.

“I should get these to my room before they wither.”

“Yeah I should probably head to the training ground.” You said your respective farewells before going in opposite directions. This had been awkward to say the least and you were glad it was over.

However, naivety got the best of you. The next morning you were greeted by a large teddy bear that was placed in your seat. Your eyebrow began to twitch as you heard whispers spreading in the classroom.

“Hey is that from Okkotsu? Super creepy!”

“Yeah, poor Y/n-chan.”

“What do you mean by that?” Your patience had reached its limit and with narrowed eyes you turned to look at the girls you heard whispering.

“Don’t you know, Okkotsu curses his lovers!”

“Yeah, he becomes obsessed with them and then they die in mysterious ways!”

“That is literally the most idiotic thing I’ve heard in my life.” Sure, you knew the story of Rika, but from actual reliable sources you also knew that it was a tragic accident that happened when Yuuta was only a child. It was disturbing how they twisted the story just because they were afraid of him.

“If you have this much time to waste on spreading such stupid rumours then I suggest you channel that energy in training. Otherwise you’ll be stuck at grade 4 until the end of days.” As a grade 2 sorcerer yourself, maybe you shouldn’t have looked down on them, but for some reason the way they were acting towards Yuuta was just infuriating and you found yourself becoming quite protective.

You never snapped at them like this before, if anything you were considered quite docile, so the whole class fell silent. You grabbed the giant teddy bear from your seat and stomped towards the door, nearly bumping into Gojo as the later stepped inside the room.

“Where you going Y/n-chan? Class is about the start.”

“I’m going to find Yuuta!” You huffed and walked out of the classroom, knowing full well that you will probably get punished for your actions.

“Y/n-chan is so determined! Everyone, you should have more determination as well!” That was the last thing you heard as Gojo closed the door behind you.

You began your search for Yuuta, trying to ignore the looks that the faculty members you came across were giving you. You must have looked quite ridiculous, carrying that large teddy bear around.

You finally found him near the armoury, and judging from his sweaty appearance you guessed he had just finished training.

“Senpai!”

He looked at you, almost in a panicked way and you quickened your pace so he couldn’t make a run for it.

“Y/n-chan, what-”

“Senpai, this has to stop.” You really didn’t want to tell him your real motives from that day but you also couldn’t let this chain of gifts continue.

“That box of chocolates wasn’t initially for you. I bought it for myself, I only gave it to you because senpai looked so upset. I’m sorry that you misunderstood, it’s not pity or anything, I just thought you deserved it.” You didn’t even stop to breath, you had to let it all out and explain before you lost your nerve. “I’m really happy you liked them but I don’t deserve all these presents in return.”

You looked at him and expected to see anger or disappointment, instead you were greeted with light laughter.

“You’re really cute! Maki-san said not to tease you too much because you’re such a good girl. I guess she didn’t realize how much of a good girl you actually are.” The way he said ‘good girl’ made your heart skip a beat. It sounded almost provocative.

Within a second, he had closed the distance between the two of you and his hand reached to stroke your cheek ever so gentle. Suddenly he was there and you became hyperaware of his powerful presence. You noticed the pretty colour of his eyes, how his hand was just a bit rough and how that small smirk of his made your knees weak and your cheeks burn. You gulped and he seemed to enjoy your reaction.

“I don’t mind that the box of chocolates wasn’t for me. I’m just glad it gave me the opportunity to talk to you.” At this point you felt so bad you hoped the earth beneath you would just crack open and swallow you whole.

“Anyway, you should probably head to class before Gojo-sensei gets upset. Let me get that for you.” He reached for the teddy bear in your arms but you gripped it and pulled back.

“I would like to keep this, it’s a special gift from senpai and I’ll treasure it.” Sure this all began because of a silly box of chocolates but you were also happy that you finally got to see a glimpse of him that not many people got the chance to see. Now that you had a taste of it, you wanted more.

“Well I wasn’t planning on taking it away, just wanted to help you carry it.”

“It’s fine, the whole school saw me already so I might as well parade with it back to class.”

He studied your face for a few moments before his expression turned serious.

“Y/n-chan, do you think we could go-”

“I’d love to go on a date!”

You beat him to it but you wanted to make sure he knew, even before asking, that you really wanted to get to know him better.

“I see, I’m really happy.” His hand reached for yours and gripped it gently. It never failed to surprise you how cool and confident he looked at times and then he did a one hundred eighty and turned into this awkward and adorable mess.

“I must admit this is the first time I’ve asked someone out. I’ll be sure to ask Gojo-sensei-”

“Oh no, please promise me to never ask Gojo-sensei for advice concerning girls.” He was probably laughing like a mad man while giving Yuuta such cringe worthy ideas for your gifts.

“Oh but sensei said girls love swans and-”

“Never!”

[theonewiththefanfics]

Because Hearts Get Broken - Loving Is The Antidote (Part 3/3)

Because Hearts Get Broken Part 3 :) read the first two on my masterlist 

Synopsis: Overcoming fears is not an easy thing, but maybe it’s worth a shot if the ending leads to happiness. 

Pairing: Harry Styles x fem!Reader

Genre: kinda angsty, mostly fluffy and SHMUTTYYYYYYYYY

Warnings: SMUT!!! (so beware, this is kinda sweet, but oh so filthy; unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), m going down on f, slight fingering etc), swearing

Word count: 5895

Y/N had never been so nervous while getting ready for a show. She liked to be front-row, right by the stage to feel as close to the music as possible, the energy of the crowd filling her up and making her buzz with excitement, even hours after the concert was done. 

        The thing was – with when they started dating and then with the pandemic shutting everything down in spring, Y/N had never seen Harry live. Sure, he’d given her private concerts, had sung her any song she wanted, but this was different. Somehow, even though there were more people, it felt more intimate because this wasn’t just him lulling Y/N to sleep. This was Harry baring part of his soul to the world, and doing it with such ease, it made her heart ache.

        The venue was small, at least compared to the arena sizes Y/N knew he typically performed at. There were around 100ish or so people, and the line was quite quick to move. 

        She told the woman with the clipboard her name and provided some ID. The list wasn’t that long, and it took her barely two seconds to spot the name, as she smiled and gave Y/N a nod.

        “I’ll have Bert escort you to the backstage if you’ll just follow him, please.”

        “Could I actually watch from the crowd?” Y/N asked biting her lip. “I love being a part of it, you know. Feel the energy and stuff.”

        “Uh, sure.” The woman gave her an uncertain look. “It’s just that Mr Styles asked for you to be brought backstage, and umm…”

        “If Harry says anything,” Y/N put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “I’ll deal with it. Please, don’t worry too much. Unless he wants a kidnapping charge, he’ll deal with the fact that I’m inside the venue.”

        And that seemed to do the trick, as the girl, visibly relaxed and even laughed a bit, handing Y/N back her ID and motioning with her head to go inside. 

        Small tables had been set up, and each one could house four people at a time. Most of them had already been taken and given how she didn’t want to draw any attention, Y/N decided to take one of the tables at the very back, a pillar half obscuring the stage and with that – her face. 

        The enthusiasm was palpable in the air, and people were chattering away, anticipating the moment Harry with his band would walk onto the stage. A waitress came up to her, asking if she wanted anything to eat or drink.

        “And your name, please? To set up a tab.”

        “Y/N Y/L/N.”

        “Oh,” her eyes went a bit wide. “Um, no need to pay then.”

        Her brows furrowed. “Excuse me?”

        “We’ve been told that anything you order should be put on Mr Sty – “

        “Mr Styles tab,” Y/N finished the sentence with a chuckle. “Yeah. Okay… well, is it possible for you to not say anything to him and let me pay for my drinks?”

        “I – “ she shrugged. “I guess?”

        “Just the G&T please.”

        The waitress nodded and clicked her pen, still seemingly unsure about what to do, but ultimately deciding to go with what Y/N asked. “Coming right up.”

        The lights dimmed, and Y/N’s attention was brought to the stage, where she saw Harry, Sarah, Mitch, Adam, Naomi and Charlotte appear and take their places, as applause and cheers became their background music.

        He looked good, very good, in fact. His brown hair was the typical messy mop on top of his head, the signature pearl necklace around his neck, while he sported the soft rainbow cardigan, a sharp-looking high neck button-up, and black slacks, with black boots.

        “Thank you all for coming on such short notice,” Harry started, and it made a collective chuckle rise into the air. He could post a fleeting comment on Instagram saying he was having a concert in three minutes, and there’d be ten thousand fans waiting for him. “When ‘Save the Children’ reached out to us and asked if we could help them raise some donations, we immediately hopped on the idea, and it warms our hearts seeing so many of you here, and the fact that you’re supporting their cause.”

        Loud cheers immediately exploded, and Y/N obviously joined in. 

        “All proceeds for the tickets made today will go to them, as will any other donations you decide to give, so, I hope you do, and let’s get the show going.”

        That was Sarah’s cue to hit her drumsticks together three times, as the notes of ‘Golden’ rattled the air.

        Seeing Harry in his element was nothing short of electric. Although he was sitting down, and most of the songs he sang were acoustic versions, it was dazzling to see the passion seep out of his body and into the lyrics he'd composed. 

        Throughout most of it, his green eyes kept scanning over the gathered people, while flitting to see what was happening behind the curtain, and it made Y/N sort of giddy, thinking that he might be trying to find her.

        Because in truth, he was. When Harry had arrived, he was all nerves and jitters, which had never happened before a show. Well, never before had Y/N come to one of his shows, so there was also that. 

        All throughout prep, he was waiting for someone from the staff to come up to him and tell him his girl had come, but no one did, until like five minutes before he was supposed to perform, a breathless woman, who seemed so nervous she was about to pass out, had tapped him on the shoulder.

        “Is she here?” Now he was the breathless one. 

        “Uh, yeah, Y/N arrived a little while ago.”

        His forehead creased in confusion. “Then, where is she? No one came to inform me.”

        “I’m so sorry Mr Styles, but she asked to be allowed into the crowd, she uh… didn’t wanna be taken backstage.”

        “Oh.”

        That was literally all he could manage, as his heart dropped. “Well… at least she’s here.” He gave the assistant a smile. “Thank you. I uh, I hope you’ll enjoy the show.”

        Then it was call-time, and he had to gather himself as he walked on the small podium, taking his place by the mic, and beginning the concert.

        After each song, he scanned the gathered people, in hopes of seeing Y/N’s face, but she had hidden really well, and when he’d looked to the sides, wishing to see her frame standing there, he had to remind himself, that she was there, and he still had to fulfil a little surprise, which he hoped she’d like.

“You know when writing… songs are inspired by many things, but just like with books you reread, they can get new meanings and make you feel different than before. So, although I had no clue this person existed when I wrote this song, the second I met her, I knew it was about her. She’s uh, she’s here tonight.”

Y/N’s head snapped up from where she’d been propping it against her hand so hard, she was sure she heard a bone crack.

        No.

        Fucking.

        Way.

        “So, I’d like to end this small get together and dedicate it to her. And I know this isn’t one of her favourite songs,” Harry let out a small laugh, Sarah mimicking it behind the drums. “She told me she’s kind of sick of it, given how it was all over the radio at one point, but uh, I hope that maybe, she - uh - she just listens to the words, and knows I mean it.”

        Y/N didn’t even need the first chord to be played to know what song he meant. ‘Adore You’. 

        During their quarantine, she’d jokingly said if it played one more time on the radio, she’d have to break up with him.

        He’d yanked her down on the couch, nose nuzzling into her hair. “ ‘N why’s that? Thought you liked my singing.”

        “I do,” Y/N wove her fingers into his locks and massaged at his scalp, making Harry let out a satisfied groan. “I just don’t wanna hear you sing about loving and adoring someone that ain’t me.”

        A playful smirk pressed against her skin. “Jealous, are we?”

        “No,” Y/N shrugged pinching his side. “Jus’ tired of the song.”

        “Don’t worry.” He brought his face from where he’d hidden it by her shoulder and turned hers to face him. “From now on, whenever I’ll sing it, I’ll sing it for you. You’re the only person I wanna love and adore.”

        “What about Gem and your mum.”

        A disgusted look passed over his features. “Not in that way!”

        “Harry!” Y/N slapped his arm as both of them dissolved into laughter. 

        “You don’t have to say you love me,” he sung, breaking her out of the trance, “you don’t have to say nothing, you don’t have to say you’re mine.”

        She’d never hated the song, never meant it when she’d said that, and could never be mad at Harry for having written out his feelings, woven them into notes and masterfully put it together for others to hear.

        It was a weird notion to Y/N though, knowing everyone in the world could hear how he’d loved someone so much, but that was just because of her own inability to properly express her feelings. Yet now, listening to him sing that song for her, made her chest hurt.

        Thankfully Y/N wasn’t the only one sniffling in the audience, so she wasn’t standing out that much. She was kind of scared that Harry might look over and others would connect the dots, but he didn’t, not really at least. His green eyes scanned the people, but mostly he kept his gaze on the floor, as if afraid of what reaction everyone would have as the song ended.

        “Thank you,” he muttered into the microphone the cheers morphed into ovations, while he pressed his fingers against his lips and ‘sent’ the kiss to the audience before retreating backstage with his band in tow. As people started to filter out, groups heading down the street while others lingered in hopes of catching a glimpse or having a word with Harry, Y/N waited by the table, finishing off her drink before moving towards the backstage. 

        “I uh.” She showed one of the security guards her ID. “I was told I can come backstage?”

        The burly man looked down at the woman next to him, who much like the assistant before had a clipboard. When she found Y/N’s name she looked up and smiled. “Right this way.”

        They wove through the small walkways, as people rushed back and forth, coiling up wires, dismantling the drum-set and carefully placing the instruments in their boxes for them to be put in the van.

        “He’ll be back here in a minute,” the representative said, opening up a door where Harry’s name was plastered on, letting her step in, and Y/N nodded, pulling her jumper sleeves down her palms.

        It was a nervous habit of hers, having switched over from biting her nails to plucking at loose threads of clothing to now pulling at them. Harry had been the one to help her get rid of the biting.

        “How am I supposed to paint your nails, if you rip them off?”

        Y/N had scoffed shoving him a bit. “You have your own nails to paint.”

        “Yes, but I wanna make your pretty too.”

        “You telling me I ain’t pretty enough for you?”

        “No, I think you’re gorgeous, but,” he’d leaned closer to her, so close she could feel his teeth graze her earlobe, “I do love it when I can see marks on my back in the morning.”

        Y/N let out a shaky breath, as butterflies tumbled through her stomach. Three minutes of anticipation and the door clicked open, making her whip around and come face to face with Harry.

        “Hey,” he breathed out. “I uh I didn’t really think you’d come, but I’m really happy you did.”

        Y/N shrugged toeing at the ground and smoothing her hands against her thighs. “I’ll always do everything I can to support you. Being together is not a condition in my book for making sure you’re alright and happy.”

        “Did you uh – di –“

        “Did I hear the song?” she interrupted him, and Harry visibly gulped nodding. 

        “Yeah.” It was barely a whisper, her eyes cast down, noticing how his foot was tapping an irregular rhythm.

        “And?”

        “And?” Y/N let out a chuckle before leaning down to the couch and grabbing a pillow. “How! Dare! You!” she yelled, hitting his arm with it. “You think you can just do that, you think you can dedicate a song – a fucking love song – to me and get away with it? You think you can just be sweet and nice and so fucking loving and not make me fall in love with you more? And – and – and you just think you can do that?! And make me feel things?”

        Harry’s smile was blinding, as he grabbed the pillow, throwing it onto the sofa, and eliminating the two remaining steps between the two, hands on her waist, forehead to hers, as Y/N huffed seeing the smirk bloom even more on his lips. “I made you feel things, huh?”

        “Yes,” she grumbled crossing her arms in front of her chest, but in no way was she attempting to push away from him, actually relishing his touch and warmth, and his skin against hers. “You did. And I hate you for that.”

        “Do ya really, dove?” He was smiling wider than before.

        Her nose brushed against his. “Very much so.”

        “I love you too. So much.”

        “You sure you want to take a chance on me?” Y/N had to ask. “It’s – I can’t promise it’ll be easy.”

        “Love’s not supposed to be easy. And you’re worth it. You’re worth everything to me.”

        “Okay then…” She had to suppress the cry that threatened to break out of her throat by clearing it.  “But on one condition,” Y/N stated with all seriousness. “You give me a proper shag right here, right now, because I’ve missed you so much, I won’t be able to wait until home.”

“Fuck, dove!” Harry groaned and cupped her cheeks, pulling her lips to his. “They’re gonna ban me from here,” Harry muttered against Y/N’s mouth, trying to wiggle out of the cardigan.

        “Then let’s give them a reason,” Y/N hummed against his lips, as her fingers, shaky but still nimble, undid the first button to his high-collared shirt. 

        Down and down, they went until the planes of his chest and stomach were exposed, and she could indulge herself by letting her palms and nails rake over the skin and the tattoos.

        “Wanna taste you,” Harry gasped pulling away for a breath of air. “Haven’t had you in so long, wanna feel you cum on my tongue.”

        Y/N’s eyes rolled to the back of her head from his words alone, and given how she didn’t trust her voice to not shake, she nodded her head, helping him get her boots off, toeing the socks with them and then shimmying out of her jeans.

        Her bottom half was practically naked when Harry pulled her by the thighs, legs around his waist and lowered her on the shabby sofa. Her mind was so hazy from all the love and pleasure, Y/N didn’t even care about how it probably hadn’t had a good deep clean in ages.

        Skilful hands lifted up her jumper, exposing the tank underneath. Harry raised his eyebrow. “How many layers do you have on? I want you naked.”

        “It’s fucking winter in New York.” Y/N helped him remove the piece of clothing he found so offensive. “Did you want me to come in just lingerie and freeze my tits off?”

        He hummed before looking up. “Speaking of tits? Can I see ‘em?”

         “Maybe. If you eat me out first.”

        “Deal.” 

        The thing was, as much as Harry wanted to dive right into it, he was feeling mischievous, so he decided to drag out the process as much as possible. Hands caressing her sides, he lifted the shirt so he could press kisses to her stomach, leaving invisible marks of love with every step of the way, and he grinned to himself hearing Y/N’s breath hitch as he reached her underwear.

        There was an embarrassingly large wet spot, and Harry pressed his hips against the couch to somewhat minimise the pain he was starting to feel. He was not gonna blow a load in his pants when he finally got to be with Y/N again. 

        “Can I take 'em off?” Harry murmured, leaving a fluttery press of his mouth against her hipbone, while she viciously nodded. 

        Quickly he pressed a kiss to the spot he’d soon be able to see unclothed, and it made Y/N jerk, but fuck she was eager, pupils blown so much there was nothing left of her usual Y/E/C eyes, but two black abysses.

        Harry’s were quite the same, as the green had turned dark jade, and even that was a small ringlet around his intense gaze.

        “Do not!” She pointed a finger at him, and Harry stopped mid-motion, just as he was going to pocket her panties. “I won’t go commando while wearing jeans.”

        “But –“

        “It’s not you who’ll chafe.”

        Harry huffed, and put them on the side of the couch. “Fine. But just so you know, you’re very boring and are ruining all the fun.”

        “At least I won’t have to deal with a yeast infection.”

        He couldn’t argue with that, running his hands over her thighs. “Fair enough. But you owe me a kiss.”

        “Come here, you doofus,” she grabbed at the open lapels of his shirt and pulled him down, arms looping around his broad shoulder to have his chest pressed against hers and bring their lips back together. 

        For a couple of minutes, they let their tongues dance in the familiar rhythm. There were no teeth clashing, no foreheads bumping or biting. Despite both of their eagerness, they’d decided to revel in being together, so each kiss was experienced to the fullest.

        “Better?” she asked, completely out of breath, as they pulled apart. 

        “Yeah.” Harry smiled, mind a blissed-out haze. “Now, where were we?”

        She couldn’t really think straight either, so her only response was a lift of her hips.

        “Right,” he sighed and slipped a delicate hand down her tummy and along the inside of her legs.  “God, I missed being here.” And slowly his head joined where he was brushing the sensitive skin of the apex of her thighs.

        “Harry!” she dragged out his name, as his fingers just kept skimming her skin, and when she thought they’d slip past her folds, he dragged them back to the inner thigh. “Stop teasing!” Y/N had her hands over her eyes. 

        “Why?” he smirked, kissing right around the place she wanted his lips on, but not on it. “It’s fun. Payback for everything you put me through.”

        “Harry, I swear if you don’t put your tongue in me, I’ll put my foot through your face.”

        He lifted her legs up, and then over his shoulders, caging her hips in with his arms. “Not if I do that.”

        “Just – fuck! You’re such a bully!” Y/N laughed. 

        “Are you telling me, I’m being mean to my girlfriend, the love of my life, owner of my heart and soul?” he asked, leaning his cheek to rest against the inside of her thigh, and she wove her fingers into his hair.

        “Well, if you don’t do anything, it’s gonna be ex-girlfriend again.”

        Harry narrowed his eyes. “Look who’s being a bully now.”

        “But – just – please!” she whined. “Please, I need it so bad.”

        “Need what?”

        “Ugh, you’re such a menace!” Y/N pretty much yelled and leaned to rest herself on her elbows, catching Harry’s eyes to keep a direct gaze. “I need your tongue so far up my cunt, that by the end of it all, your neck is covered in my cum. Happy now?”

        His grin was wicked. “Very.”

        That seemed to do the trick, as he lowered his head, and with closed eyes like a wine taster, finally attached his mouth to where Y/N had been craving him for so long. A deep sigh of relief passed her lips, and she threw her head back against the couch cushion, savouring the feeling of what was happening to her. 

        “Did you eat pineapples before coming?” Harry asked, replacing his tongue with two of his fingers; they slipped in without any resistance with how wet she was. “Taste… sweet.”

        “Had a fruit salad for dinner,” she moaned as he leaned back in and licked a broad stripe. “Didn’t have anything else in the fridge.”

        “That’s not proper dinner. Pizza afterwards?”

        Y/N hummed as he sucked on her clit. “Domino’s?”

        Harry linked his fingers through hers and brought their intertwined hands to rest on her stomach. “Whatever you want.”

        “Isn’t this kind of cheating for you though?” she let out a choked-back laugh, and with furrowed brows, he detached himself from her core.

        “What’dya mean?”

        “You’re having dessert first.”

        The singer threw his head back with a cackle. “Don’t worry, I’ll eat my veggies. But let me finish having my fruit first.”

        It was like he’d been starved of her, and in a way, Harry definitely had been. For almost three months, a quarter of a year, he hadn’t felt Y/N’s touch, hadn’t tasted her, nor pretty much heard the sounds she made.

        All he’d been left with was one last good-bye, a kiss given in a passion induced haze, and the one-sentence she’d recorded for her voicemail box, and well, let’s just say – Harry was more than happy to feel her hands let go of his and grasp onto his hair, to drink up everything she offered and listen to all of the moans Y/N was no longer depriving him of. It was heaven, to say the least.

        “ ‘M not gonna last long,” she gasped, yanking at his hair, making him moan into her, the vibrations only adding to the already intense pleasure that was coursing through her veins.

        Harry released her clit with a small pop. “Don’t want you to last long. Want you to cum and do it like you said you would – soak me all the way down to my neck.”

        A second later, he had his mouth around her clit again, ten seconds later, her whole body seized up, the air got stuck at the back of her throat, as her eyes rolled to the back, and her back arched up from the couch so far Harry almost lost his hold on Y/N’s waist.

        It was through a fog she heard Harry speak, and it took all of her willpower to focus on understanding what he was saying.

        “Hey, come back to me, dove,” he whispered, gentle palms coming to hold Y/N’s face, and he intently watched her eyelids flutter, body still going through the aftershocks of orgasm. “Come back, dove.”

        “Mhmm,” she let out a soft sigh, leaning her face more into Harry’s touch before opening her eyes and giving him a fucked-out smile. 

        “You good there?”

        The words ‘the best’ were pretty much a slur, but Harry understood them, eyes twinkling. “Take my top off.”

        “What?”

        She quirked an eyebrow. “Didn’t you wanna see my tits?”

        “Yeah,” Harry laughed. “I did – do. Very much so. Gonna let me?”

        “Just take my top off.” 

        Pressing a chaste kiss to her lips, where she could taste herself (and much like Harry had said – she did taste sweet), he practically ripped the tank top off, and with a little help from Y/N who stretched her back, the bra came off as well, revealing her in her full naked glory.

        “So beautiful,” he uttered in a soft voice. “Still so bloody gorgeous. Should kick myself for ever letting you go even for a second.”

        A little piece of her heart broke at Harry’s statement. “Wasn’t your fault.”

        “Maybe.” He dragged a hand between her breasts and watched as Y/N’s breathing went ragged. “Maybe not. All I know is, I shouldn’t have let you leave.”

        “Then don’t let me. Please.”

        It was the tears in her eyes which made him lean down and give her an open-mouthed kiss, tongue twisting against hers, promising that whatever happened, whatever insecurities came their way, he wouldn’t ever let go. 

        “Take these off,” Y/N said, popping open the button to his slack, and even that small motion made Harry release a groan of relief, as some of the pressure was taken off his painfully hard dick. “Wanna have you inside me.”

        “Dove, you’ll kill me with that mouth of yours.”

        “I’d rather you raw me than die.”

        “ ‘S not my fault you’ve got such a dirty mouth.”

        He’d managed to kick off his shoes, and shimmy the trousers down, now lying in a pile on the floor, while Y/N had fully removed his shirt and had thrown it somewhere across the room, itching to just have him pressed against her. 

        “Condom,” Harry hissed when Y/N’s hand slipped behind his briefs and grabbed him at the base, twisting her palm the way he liked, and slowly moving it up so she could press her thumb against the sensitive tip. “Condom – shit – Y/N,  I wanna cum, but not that quick.”

        “Nuhu,” she shook her head, wrapping her legs around his waist, both her hands going to the back of his underwear and dragging them down, not before squeezing his ass. “I said I want you to raw me.”

        If Harry was going to bust a nut before, now it took him literally biting on his lip and closing his eyes for a minute to gather composure.

        “Wait no!” Y/N suddenly sat upright as he was going to lean down, almost knocking her forehead to his nose.

        “What? What’s wrong?”

        “Nothing, I just wanna blow you.”

        “I –,“ he stammered, “you – fuck. Okay. As much as I love that idea, because believe me I do, you’ll have to do it later, ‘cause I’m just about ready to cum.”

        Y/N’s brows furrowed, hand reaching for his hard member, Harry having to stop her midway. “But – you just gave me such good head. I wanna give some to you too.”

        “I will literally cum just from you talking if you don’t stop, but I really wanna fuck you, so will you please just let me?”

        “Okay,” Y/N nodded leaning back down and reaching for Harry to lay over her. “But you’ll let me stuff my face with your cock after?”

        “Jesus Christ.”

        “ ‘S not fun being teased, is it?” Y/N grinned, biting on his earlobe, as Harry took himself and lined up with her entrance, letting the tip nudge against her clit.

        “Yes well,” he took in a breath, slowly sinking in, “if you giving me a blowjob is your form of revenge, I might have to piss you off more.”

        That was a suggestion Y/N was happy to take him up on, as long as it got Harry inside her. 

        He was being very gentle, very much so aware of how sensitive she still was from her previous orgasm, and all he wanted to do was make her feel as good as possible, so he stilled half-way in, but Y/N shook her head.

        “More,” she whimpered.

         “Don’t wanna hurt you,” he muttered against her lips, legs shaking from how much pleasure he was already having, but still very much so attuned to what Y/N’s body was telling him, yet she seemed to not be having any of it.

        “Harry if you don’t get inside me right up to your balls, I will get myself off in front of you, and leave you high and dry.”

        “Now that,” he looked at her pointedly, “just won’t do.” And with those words, he sank deeper, just as Y/N had requested until he’d bottomed out.

        All the air had been choked out of her lungs from the sensation, and not only did Harry have to wait for a second for her to adjust (and to compose himself somewhat), but also for Y/N to take in a breath.

        “Breathe, dove,” he let out a small laugh, and it made Y/N reciprocate, her chest rattling with uneven intakes. “Said I didn’t wanna hurt you, let alone kill you.”

        “ ‘S not my fault your dick’s massive.”

        “Do I hear complaining?”

        “No, just stating a fact.”

        “Well, I’ll be taking that as a compliment.” He smoothed away some strands of hair, letting the two of them just lay there for a moment, to relish in the normalcy of the situation and how amazing it was to be back together, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

        Harry left kisses all over Y/N’s face as she calmed down, lips skimming over her cheeks, then down her jawline, up her chin to give a peck on the lips before kissing the tip of her nose and the bridge, then each of her eyelids and then the forehead before slipping to soothe at her temples. “You alright?” He checked in, a thumb stroking her cheek. “Do you want some water maybe?”

        “No,” she shook her head, her own palms on a never-stopping motion on his back, up and down, and then circling against Harry’s sides. “Jus’ needed a second to gather myself. ‘S been a while.”

        “So, you haven’t gotten with anyone while we – “

        Y/N raised an eyebrow as his question trickled off. “Do you really wanna know if I’ve had sex with anyone? Right now? With your dick all the way in my vagina?”

        “Hey! STDs are a real thing!”

        “Harry, if I was, I would’ve told you before all of this. And not just because of health risks…”

        And that made something in his chest bloom. This certain hope, he’d felt get extinguished when Y/N had broken it off, but that had been quite the pest in his mind. The hope that was the reason he’d tried so hard to talk to her both on New Year’s and then the week prior – the hope, that Y/N did trust him enough to open up, and that if he just gave her the time, she’d do so without inhibitions.

        Her answer confirmed it to Harry. He had no rights to know what her sex life was like when they weren’t together, he wasn’t her keeper, but the fact that she’d implied, she would’ve let him know regardless, that Y/N so wholeheartedly trusted him with such intimate information made that hope blossom into a glowing flower.

        “I haven’t been with anyone either,” his tone was sincere. “I – I couldn’t. I tried to, but I just couldn’t take it that far, because every time I opened my eyes… it wasn’t you staring back at me.”

        “Haz…” tears gleamed on Y/N’s bottom lashes, and when they fell, he gently wiped them away. “I’m sorry.”

        “No.” He shook his head. “None of that. It was a good thing. Because we’re here, right now, right this second, and it’s you I’m with, and it’s you I wanted. Needed. So, none of that.”

        “I just – “

        “I know,” he said and pressed his forehead against hers. “I know.”

        “Okay… I – “ she took in a breath. “I think you can move now.”

        “You sure?”

        “Mhm,” Y/N hummed. “Just take it slow at first.”

        Harry’s head fell into the crook of her neck. “I’ll take care of you. Promise. Just tell me if it hurts, and we’ll stop.”

        “You could never hurt me.”

        And as much as her statement made his insides all warm and fuzzy, Harry still moved gently. Slowly he rolled his hips into hers and took in the small moan that left Y/N’s throat. Then once more, and more, and more until he’d set a bruising pace, pounding into her so much, the table next to the sofa shook with the force.

        “Fuck, Haz.” It was a breathless whimper, her nails digging oh so deliciously into his back, leaving crescent moon marks for him to admire later. “Feels so good. So deep.”

        “And you’re so tight,” he grunted, placing a hand on her lower stomach and pushing down until he could feel himself moving inside of Y/N. “Taking me so fucking well.”

        One of his palms came to rest by her head, and the other took the arm of the couch, giving Harry the chance to lean into her even more and finally hit that spot that made all thought leave her head, and all breaths come in short gasps, while she desperately tried to hold onto reality by digging her nails in his biceps.

        Not that Harry was fairing any better. With every thrust and stroke, he was slowly coming closer to letting go, to finally getting that release he craved and painting Y/N’s core with his cum, but before that, he just had to, if only to prove to himself he could, get her off one more time. 

        His palm slipped down from the armrest of the couch, over Y/N’s collarbones, squeezing her breast before finding its way between them to rub circles over her clit.

        “Ah, shit,” he moaned, looking at where his cock was disappearing into her, wetness spilling and sticking to his lower abdomen and thighs. “Fuck, dove, I need you to come.”

        “ ‘M almost there,” she gasped. “Don’t stop rubbing.”

        He didn’t, instead, increasing the pace, and he felt her clench more and more until there was pretty much no way for him to move and that pushed both of them over the edge.

        It was an explosion of fireworks without a sound, as bright colours came to life behind their eyelids, but all the noise became non-existent, the most euphoric feeling in the world seemed to replace their blood and replenish their souls with love.

        But funnily enough, even though Y/N was the one who’d had two mind-blowing orgasms, it seemed Harry was having a harder time coming down from the high, as he was still shaking, his whole body racked by tremors, hair sticking to his sweat-slicked skin.

        “Come back to me, Haz.” Y/N kissed his eyelids just like he’d done to her. “Come back. ‘S alright.”

        “Nuhu,” he shook his head, laughter rumbling through his chest and reverberating into hers. “I think you’ve killed me. Absolutely bloody murdered me.”

        “Guess I gotta hide your body then.” She smiled, letting her hands roam his back and soothe the pain her nails had left.

        “Good thing you’re obsessed with all those crime shows.”

        “Gotta get some useful skills somehow.”

        Loud banging against the door made the two jump, and Harry whipped his head towards it.

        “Are you two done fucking?” Sarah hollered. “ ‘Cause there are people here who’d like to change and get something to eat.”

        “What’dya say?” Harry raised an eyebrow at Y/N. “Pizza?”

        “You did promise dinner.”

        “I did.” He kissed her. God, he was never going to get tired of kissing her. And luckily, Y/N was there to stay.

        “Great.” She smiled. “And after that, I’ll get my desert.”

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take):

Everything tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64​ @supernaturalbaesduh​ @breezy1415​ @crazy--me​ @thatawkwardlittlefangirl​ @sea040561 @staryeyedgirl​ @deathbyarabbit​ @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91​ @dalilx​ @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns​ @averyrogers83​ @in-the-end-im-still-trash​ @gallifreyansass​ @dewy-biitch​ @avxgers​ @unlikelygalaxygiver​ @magicwithaknife​ @ollyoxenfrees​ @bnhvrdy​ @tvwhoresblog​ @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl​ @sj-thefan​ @teenwolflover28 @lestersglitterglue​ @im-squished​

Harry Styles tags: @sarcasticallywitty15​ @breezykpop​ @girlboss99​ @harrystylesdoesntknowiexist​ @alliyjane​ @sirtommyholland​

A/N:..... I need a cold shower, yall. Didn’t intend for it to get that explicit, but oh well :D 

P.S. my tags are always open :)

[milkybonya]

In THE DaRk

order 004 for anon: large coconut milk tea (In THE DaRk by BOBBy) with regular tapioca pearls and fresh taro

Warnings: food mentions

Pairing: idol!Hui x delivery worker!reader

Summary: you deliver food to cube ent. and end up becoming friends with Hui, an idol who's at the peak of his career... but he finds himself falling for you even as his songs rise on the charts :")

Word count: like maybe 3k?

[a/n]: i love this request because i love this song and writing it while listening to the song on loop in the dark of my room just made me so happy? also i put wayyyy more effort into this than necessary and it turned out super long >.< i'm so sorry anonnie i hope you like itttt ahhh

Shine, you shine on my existence

Sure, Hui was an idol with a life of his own - especially now, during Shine promotions, that his group, PENTAGON, was blowing up. Yet he never failed to make time for you, because you were the light of his life.

As a hardworking idol who was always cooped up in his studio and skipping meals, his members encouraged him to at least order food. He was reluctant but eventually agreed, not wanting to make them worry.

That's where you came in: a delivery worker at a local restaurant not too far from Cube entertainment, Hui's company. A lot of people ordered from your restaurant to Cube, so you weren't surprised when a new order flashed on the iPad screen at your workplace.

"We've got another delivery, [y/n]," the worker at the front told you with a smile, walking to the back to tell the cooks what to prepare.

You tapped your feet against the ground, awaiting the order. Once it was prepared, you carefully placed it in your delivery bag, fastened it to your bike and off you went, wearing a helmet of course.

The gentle breeze was enough to cheer you up and give you energy, despite the scene around you being full of traffic and slightly bleak.

Once you arrived, the guards let you in without even checking your workplace ID this time, recognizing you as a trusted delivery person.

You made your way up to the floor listed on the order, roaming through countless hallways until you finally found the right room. Judging by the area and the doors, it seemed to be full of studios.

The person who ordered this must be working hard, you thought to yourself.

Suddenly, you got an urge to leave a note, wishing the person well. You took out a scrap piece of paper and a pen that you always had handy, your heart racing and your hands shaking at the thought of doing this. You were excited at the idea of the person being happy to see such a cheerful note...

I hope you enjoy this meal and that it gives you enough energy to keep working hard :) Go for it!

After neatly placing the food and note at the door, you knocked and walked away, not wanting to bother the person. Even though you didn't turn your back, you heard the door open a few seconds later.

"Thank you!" a voice echoed through the hall.

You turned quickly to say ‘you’re welcome’ in response and caught a glimpse of what seemed to be a young idol hard at work. His hair was messy and he had dark circles under his eyes, but his mismatches clothes and bright smile were quite cute.

You thought that would be the last you’d see of him, but from that day onwards, he always ordered food from your restaurant at the same time: 2:09pm. Why so specific? You weren’t sure, but that’s how it was, and you being the only delivery worker at your restaurant meant that it would always be you taking the food to him.

The second time you went, you were surprised to see a note waiting on the door for you.

Thank you for your cheerful message... I’ll do my best to work harder!

It made you smile and you decided to leave another note with his order, this time just asking him what his favourite side dishes were so you could tell the cooks to put more of those in next time. Instead of him leaving a note for you with the response, though, Hui decided to text you this time so he wouldn't have to wait for you to make another delivery before you could see his response.

Unknown: This is Hui! Ah, I ordered food from you at 2:09pm? I'm not really picky on side dishes, but one of my members likes kimchi, so could you make sure to leave more of that for me?

You: sure, of course! but how did you get my number?

Hardworking Hui: Ah, sorry! It was on the app since you're the delivery worker... for me to contact you in case you get lost? I'm sorry!

You: No, that's okay! i just wanted to be sure ^^

So after that day, you made sure Hui always got extra kimchi with his order. He would always greet you at the door of his studio, quickly asking about your day and how you were doing. Truthfully, he actually wanted to ask you to come inside so he could talk with you some more, because the two of you would always get an interesting conversation going before you declared you had to leave.

Since he was too shy to ask you in person, he texted you, instead.

Hardworking Hui: could you get the rest of the day off after delivering my order today?

You: why?

Hardworking Hui: so you can eat with me? if that's okay? or just take an hour off!

You: ...

You: Only if you pay for my food :P

Hardworking Hui: deal

So that day, you asked your manager for the hour off from 2:30pm to 3:30pm. She agreed, knowing that you always work hard and deserve a break.

Showing up to Hui's studio with his usual order and some food for yourself in your hands, you knocked a little nervously this time, knowing that this wouldn't just be a delivery, but a whole... hang out? Type of thing?

Hui had made sure to clean his studio to the best of his ability, making sure that there was another comfy chair for you to sit on and that the room didn't smell bad or anything. He lit a couple of candles and vacuumed the place so there would be no dust. When you knocked on the door, he jumped out of his seat with excitement, immediately opening it.

"Hi! Come in," he said, holding the door open so you could step inside. Seeing the cosy, dimly lit space left you in awe.

"It's so cool to see where you've been working away for all this time," you said, sitting down on a chair and putting the food down.

"Yeah... sometimes I get tired of it, but it's home," Hui said, sitting on his studio chair and opening up the food.

"Ah... where's the kimchi?" Hui asked, pointing at all the dishes.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I told the cook to include my favourite side dish too, but he must have just replaced the kimchi with this instead, I'm so sorry!"

Hui laughed, shaking his head.

"It's completely fine!" he said, handing you your favourite side dish.

As the two of you began eating, you were able to get to know each other more as you spoke and asked each other questions. Even though it was a little silly asking for each other's favourite colours and seasons, it was a lot of fun, and the two of you turned out to have a lot in common.

Tears are erased by my emotions / Add, add colour to the world

After that day, you weren't just a delivery worker for Hui, and he wasn't just a customer to you. The two of you became close friends, attending the concerts of your favourite artists together. Hui would joke and say that he was attending for work reasons, trying to gain musical inspiration, while you had no real reason to be there. You'd slap his shoulder lightly, telling him to watch his words while he'd laugh at your reaction.

Even though his work was stressful at times, it was days like those that seemed to make him cry in reverse, if that was even possible? You showed up and turned his world around, adding colour onto his black and white canvas.

His members even told him that he seemed more cheerful and energetic despite still working hard in the studio, and Hui even told you that his songwriting process seemed to be running more smoothly.

"I'm so glad we became friends," he told you, leaning his head on your shoulder one day as the two of you sat on a park bench. You smiled, strongly agreeing with him in your own heart.

But do you remember when I mentioned Shine promotions at the beginning of this? Well, let's skip forward to that point.

By then, you had seen Hui and his group perform quite a few times, whether it was at concerts, music shows or even on the TV at your home. You were incredibly proud of him and wanted nothing but for him to succeed.

Every time Hui found you in the crowd at any of his live performances, he'd feel some kind of crazy adrenaline rush as all of his tiredness just seemed to magically disappear. He'd perform as if rent was due just because you gave him the energy to do so.

"Was [y/n] watching us again?" Hyunggu asked backstage after another performance for Shine ended safely.

"Yeah, I saw them there!" Hongseok confirmed.

"Plus, you can tell by the way Hui is acting," Yuto laughed, nodding towards Hui who was frantically texting you asking you if you'd left completely.

You told him you were still at the venue, and he begged you to come backstage. When you arrived, you greeted all of the Pentaboys, who adored you almost as much as Hui did, before joining Hui at his makeup table. You greeted the makeup artist too, out of respect, before asking Hui why he needed to see you so urgently.

"We might win today... I just wanted you to be by my side as good luck," he explained, a clearly worried expression on his face.

It was a shock to you that despite Shine doing so well on the charts, Pentagon still had not gotten their first win, but you knew they were an amazing group, regardless.

What you doing now? What's your plan now?

You placed your hand on top of Hui's, which rested on his own thigh.

"Hui, I know you haven't been getting all the wins you've been expecting, but we can't deny that this song is absolutely a bop and you have all been killing it!" you told him with a smile.

You couldn't tell whether or not your words had any sort of effect on him because he was looking down, but you hoped they at least didn't make him feel worse.

The rest of the Pentaboys cheered hearing your words though, feeling energized at your honest observation.

Hui was looking down because his stomach was tied in knots at the feeling of your hand on his. It was something he'd never felt before... butterflies? He tried to shrug it off but he couldn't stop wondering about your intentions... did you place your hand over his for a reason? What were you trying to tell him? What were you planning?

Inside my brain, after making a place for you / You make it impossible for me to sleep

That night, Hui still couldn't stop thinking about your simple gesture. You didn't mean anything by it, right? It was just a friend comforting a friend... the two of you had been friends for a while now, so why was he thinking into this so much?

As feelings of sleepiness took over, he drowsily wondered what it would be like to hold your hand rather than to just have his hand underneath yours. What would it be like to be held by you?

-

The next day, with more promotions ahead, you made sure to send Hui a text of good luck. You wouldn't be able to watch from the live audience that day, since you had work and deliveries to carry out, but you still wanted him to know that you were thinking of him.

Hui couldn't stop staring at your message of good luck for the whole day, pressing his finger on the heart emoji that you added at the end of your message.

"Hui hyung, are you reading something?" Wooseok asked the leader, sitting beside him on the sofa in the waiting room.

"Huh? N-no," Hui quickly said with a laugh, tucking his phone away.

"You've been staring at your phone all day... what is it, is it a fun webtoon?"

"No, no! Don't worry about it," Hui laughed, ruffling the tall boy's hair.

Wooseok whined, yelling about how the stylist just did his hair. Meanwhile, Hui's heart was racing. Why had he been staring at your text message all day?

You: I'm thinking of you today, Hui! Go get em, good luck <3

Are you thinking of me in this dawn? / I wish there was a continuous portal from my room to yours

Again, that night, Hui couldn't stop thinking about you. This time, it was about the message you'd sent him. He still had it open and was staring at it. He wondered if, when you said you were thinking of him, did that mean you were thinking of him right then and there too? At the same time when he was thinking about you?

Were your sleepless thoughts filled with him, just like his were filled with you-?

Ring ring. Ring ring.

Shit.

He'd been staring at your text and holding his phone so tightly that he accidentally pressed the call icon next to your name.

"Hello?" you answered sleepily. It was 3am and you had been asleep.

"H-hello? [y/n]?"

"Yes, Hui, what is it?"

"I uh..."

He desperately tried to think of an excuse for calling you, any reason-

"I wish there was a portal that went directly from my room to yours."

Really, Hui? Was that the best thing you could think of?

His heart raced and he smiled as he heard your laugh on the other end. He didn't realize he'd balled his other hand into a fist until your laughter made him calm down.

"What are you saying, Hui?"

"I miss you..." he mumbled.

Despite being sleepy, his words still made you nervous. Your heart raced and you wondered what he was trying to tell you.

"I m-miss you too," you croaked out.

"Really?" Hui asked you, sitting up in bed.

"Yeah, really," you said, laughing. It wasn't a lie, either. You'd been watching all of his performances on your phone that day while working, almost falling off your bike because you were that invested. In him.

"Do you wanna meet up now?"

"Now?" you spluttered.

"Yeah... by the Han River?"

You paused for a while before answering.

"Let's do it."

Even if I breathe in the cold air / It feels sweet, so sweet

"AHHH IT'S SO COOOOLD!" Hui yelled into the night air, rubbing his arms and running around in circles beside you.

"Here, take my coat," you said, but instead just wrapping your arms around him.

Hui tensed up, wondering if your arm that was wrapped around his chest could feel his heartbeat.

"W-what are you doing?" he asked.

"Providing you with warmth," you said.

You also felt butterflies stirring within you, realizing that maybe you saw Hui as more than just a friend. Yet you shrugged it off, telling yourself that Hui was an idol and you were just a delivery worker.

You can't know my pathetic feelings / Even if I've confessed a hundred times inside my brain / I'm invisible to you

Hui stayed quiet, closing his eyes tightly and enjoying the feeling of being in your arms on this cold night. He knew this embrace wouldn't last and that maybe it wouldn't happen again, because in his mind, he was invisible to you. Just a friend who you goofed around with, but all of your jokes made his heart rush.

The two of you ran around the grassy banks of Han River together, laughing into the night and chasing each other like kids. Each time Hui caught up to you, he'd wrap his small frame around you so tightly that it made you lose your breath. You told yourself it was just because you were running so hard, but it was definitely something else.

As the sun was beginning to rise and the two of you were finally in your homes, trying to get some sleep, Hui imagined what it would be like to confess to you. What if he confessed right there and then when you hugged him by the Han River? What if he told you how much he likes you and... what if you felt the same? What if you cupped his cheeks in your hands and kissed him right there as the river reflected the starlight from the sky...? What if Hui would drop his phone in shock but would kiss you back more passionately?

No, Hui. No.

If I ever want you to feel the same / That must be greedy, that'd probably be a chance to peek into heaven / 'Cause you are angel

There was no way any of that would ever happen. There was no way you would ever like him back, at least for Hui. You were way too good for him, an angel on this planet full of demons and sinners.

Little did he know that you were also squinting at the sun, struggling to get some sleep as you thought of the way Hui would press his face into your chest every time he caught up to you at the Han River as you chased each other for fun. His bright smile and gentle laughter made your heart feel like the Han River itself, gently flowing along but filled with such a refreshing feeling.

After another week of intense Shine promotions, Hui feeling all sorts of emotions as Shine continued to soar while his feelings for you also grew, it became unbearable. The two of you would talk late into the night, whether it was sending texts because Hui was busy working or whether it was phone calls. Hui thought about you every second of every day and always missed you a ton.

Please know that I like you / I just want to be there for the rest of your life

Hui asked you to meet him in his studio one evening, as he knew your work schedule and knew that you were free. You agreed, slightly confused as to how he was making time to meet with you despite being so busy.

"Hui, I'm here!" you sang, opening the door to his studio and finding him sitting there in his chair, looking especially cute as his hair was slightly ruffled and he wore a big, comfy hoodie.

"[y/n], I have to tell you something," he said, with a slightly sad smile.

"Yeah, what is it?"

You grew worried, but decided not to make a fuss over anything just yet.

"So, for some time now.... well, of course we've been good friends, and I don't want this to ruin that if you don't feel the same..."

He sighed mid-sentence.

"Gosh, I don't know why I'm rambling," he said with a laugh.

You instinctively laughed along.

"Well, [y/n]. I like you... a lot. I know it's pathetic for me to feel this way when I don't even deserve you, but-"

"You like me?" you cut him off.

Hui nodded in response, looking slightly red now.

Nervous and absolutely bewildered, you starting laughing to yourself, making Hui worry if he'd said something wrong.

"Hui, I... I like you too, what the hell?! And here I was thinking I was pathetic!"

"You're not pathetic at all!" Hui said, grinning widely and bright red in the face upon hearing your answer to his confession.

Both of you nervously smiled at each other for some time before Hui broke the silence.

"I know... it may be hard to date me... well no, it will be hard to date me since I'm an idol, but I promise I'll give this my everything. It's a given, because of how much I like you and how lucky I am for you to even date me-"

"I never said I was dating you," you joked.

"What?" Hui asked in shock.

"I'm joking! Hui, it's okay. We'll get through these difficulties together, whatever they may be," you said, holding half of his face in your right hand, stroking his cheek with your thumb.

Hui leaned into your touch, closing his eyes.

"You're right," he said, before turning his face and pressing his lips to your hand.

[perksofhs]

‘You know what that does to me’

The missus goes to a show and backstage shenanigans ensue!  (Content warning: smut, but also some fluff! Enjoy! xx) 

Watching him perform was undoubtedly one of your favourite things. Whenever you could you’d be out in the crowd, the energy of the room never failing to lift you up. Harry also fed off the crowd, the buzz he got was addictive, and if you were there he’d always kick it up a notch, looking for you whenever he could just to make sure you were enjoying yourself. He’d catch a glimpse of you swaying your hips to the music and it sent him crazy. 

“Hmm you look good in that suit baby” you hummed, appearing from behind him, wrapping your arms around his torso as he adjusted tonights suit in the mirror. “You should leave a couple buttons undone, I mean I’m sure the fans would love it, as would I” you said, pressing a kiss just below his ear, causing him to close his eyes, leaning further into your touch. You smiled, walking around to face him, unbuttoning the top two buttons of his shirt, exposing the tattoo covered skin beneath. You stood aside to let him take a look in mirror and decide whether to keep it that way, although you pretty much knew he’d do whatever you told him turned you on. “See, much better” you smirked, pecking his lips quickly. At that moment Jeff poked his head in the door “Harry can you quickly come with me and greet some of our guests?” Harry nodded “Be there in a sec” Jeff nodded, going back out into the hallway. Harry turned to you again, before pulling you in for a rather passionate kiss, your hands momentarily finding themselves in his hair. It lasted a few seconds before he reluctantly pulled away “I’ll be back soon ok?” you nodded “Go before Jeff gets annoyed” you chided, giving him a light smack on the bum, sending him towards the door. You laughed a little, shaking your head before walking back out into the green room, taking a seat beside Adam and Clare happily joining into their conversation which mostly revolved around Adam’s kids. It wasn’t long until Harry waltzed back in, walking over to the three of you and sitting himself down next to you on the already pretty cramped couch. 

“I’m squished” you joked, “Come ‘ere” Harry said, grabbing you around the waist and lifting you onto his laps, his arms eventually resting around your hips with his chin on your shoulder. You leant back into him, “hmmm this is nice” you hummed, “I was thinking, after the show, hows about we don’t go out for drinks like usual but we just stay in the hotel room and cuddle and watch a sappy rom-com like usual? I’m feeling pretty tired” you suggested, Harry smiled “That sounds like a great idea babe, haven’t had a movie night in a while, been missing The Notebook a little bit” he smirked as you rolled your eyes “Look I love that movie as much as the next person but i’m pretty sure you’ve made me watch it at least 57 times and I need a break!” you laughed, Harry pouted, trying but failing to guilt you into it, “Stop it, we’re watching The Proposal and that’s that” you pecked his still pouty lips “Ok I guess I can deal with that” he sighed, pinching your hip hard enough to make you flinch. “10 minutes to showtime guys, lets go!” the tour manager announced and everyone clambered to their feet, Harry picking you up and setting you down in the process. He grabbed your hand leading you out the door towards the backstage area, stopping right at the stairs behind the stage. You could hear the crowd humming with excitement, the energy in the room electrified. “You better rock the shit out of this place tonight” you said, unbuttoning one more button “For good luck” you winked, Harry smirked, leaning down to place a kiss on your lips, this kiss was a little deeper than the usual pre-show kiss and you knew it would be one of those shows, one where he’d show off just for you. “Have fun out there, I’ll be watching” you said, giving him one last peck before walking out into arena. 

You made your way to your usual seat next to the sound and lighting crew beside B stage, the crowd cheering for you, which is something that you still barely comprehended even though you’ve been with Harry for 4 years. The lights went down and the crowd went wild, ear piercing screams filled the space as the opening notes of Only Angel rang through the arena. A minute later Harry strutted his way onto the stage, the screams intensifying as he confidently walked from one side of the stage to the other, waving and blowing kisses before the beat dropped and he got into the music. You watched him dance across the stage, enjoying every minute of it. You swayed your hips to the music, screaming the lyrics along with the crowd, earning you a few weird glances from the crew who thought it was hilarious. A group of fans to your right waved you over a few songs into the set wanting a picture and a chat. You honestly loved talking to the fans, almost all of them were incredibly friendly and supportive of your husband which is all you really cared about. You ended up standing near them for a couple of songs until there was a chatty break in the music “Lovely meeting you guys, I’m gonna go back over to my usual spot otherwise he’ll get mad” you joked “But hey how about during the encore break you three follow me backstage to say hi quickly?” the three girls squealed with glee, nodded and thanking you profusely, “Are you serious? Omg thank you so much!” one of them screamed “I’ll come back over and you can follow me back ok? See you soon!” you said, the girls nodding frantically, before giving them a wave and wandering back to your usual spot. 

“Have we got any birthdays in the house tonight?” Harry said, searching the crowd for anyone with a hand up landing on one girl a few rows behind the pit having a quick conversation with her before getting the crowd to sing happy birthday at the top of their lungs. “So my wife’s here tonight, she flew in yesterday to surprise me, what a gem hey?” he said, his accent getting thicker at the end, you smiled, blowing him a kiss which he pretended to catch and put in his pocket causing the crowd to ‘aww’ and you to laugh. “God I’m romantic” he proclaimed, narcissistic Harry making an appearance, you rolled your eyes and smiled “Hey I saw that” he laughed “She’s back there rolling her eyes, how rude! First you won’t let me watch The Notebook now this?!” the crowd laughed, a few joking boos mixed in “Hey hey hey we don’t boo people in this room! It’s only love in this room! Spread the love people!” he yelled and the crowd cheered. You could’t help but smile, the room really was filled with only love and it was all because of him. 

The show continued, you watched him perform to the entirely enamoured crowd that couldn't focus on anything but him, his movements and his voice. Soon enough Sign of The Times started following Harrys usual spiel about how the encore works then getting everyone to bring out their torches and light the arena up, it had to be on of his favourite moments from every show. You walked over to the group of fans from before, “Hey girls you ready? We’ll make our way backstage now and you can say hello when he comes back!” you laughed as they squealed before collecting their things and following you around to the front of the arena, a few fans giving you a wave along the way. Security let you through and you stood just near the bottom of the stairs behind the stage chatting as SOTT came to an end and the lights went out before your husband came bounding down the stairs, locking eyes with you immediately before engulfing you in a rather sweaty hug. “Ew you’re sweaty!” you jokingly tried to escape the hug, a pout on his lips as you wriggled free. “I met a few people who’d like to say hello” you said, introducing the girls to Harry, watching as he gave each of them a hug, apologising for being a little gross but of course they didn’t care. He took a quick group photo with the three of them before security led them back out into the arena, leaving just you and him alone. You wrapped your arms around his neck “You look so good tonight baby” you whispered into his ear, his hands lowering to just above your bum, causing you to move a little closer, entangling your hands in his hair, tugging ever so slightly. “Baby, stop it, you know what that does to me” he moaned, biting his lip, trying to hold himself together knowing that in just about 30 seconds he’d be back on stage and he didn’t want to give anything away. “Sorry babe, I can’t help it, watching you on stage gets me all riled up and you know it so really it’s your fault” you said, hands still not leaving his sweaty hair. “20 seconds Harry!” one of stage hands called, he nodded in response, pressing a quick kiss to your lips, pulling away with a “See you soon babe” before running back up the steps and back onto the stage, another roar from the crowd filling the arena. He knew how to keep you going even if he wasn’t touching you and you both loved and hated it. 

You wandered back out, choosing to watch the last 3 songs from the back of the left GA. The Chain was always one of your favourite songs, part of the reason Harry had added it to the setlist, and if you were at a show he’d use the song to tease you, and boy did it. Tonights performance riled you up more than usual, you were growing more and more impatient with ever thrust of his hips towards the mic stand, the subtle smirks directed at only you scattered throughout the performance and by the time Kiwi came on you were hot and flustered, and Harry could tell. ‘I hate you’ you mouthed, Harry’s brow furrowing in mock confusion, he was completely aware of what he was doing and he loved it. During Kiwi you watched on, trying not to show how you were feeling because you new he was enjoying watching you squirm. You decided to leave towards the end of Kiwi, making sure he saw you walk out, looking back with a smirk on your face. You could hear Kiwi end as you walked down the hallway towards the dressing room, and the final roar of the crowd as Harry exited the stage. 

Within a matter of seconds Harry ran up behind you, grabbing your hand pulling you into a small empty dressing room and locking the door behind him. “Someones impatient” you teased, wrapping your arms around his neck, crashing your lips onto his, his arms tightly around your waist, lifting you off the ground, carrying you towards the couch. You pulled away, lying back on the small couch, your fingers fumbling with the buttons on his shirt “See I told you keeping it unbuttoned would have been much better, and easier” you joked, pecking his lips before removing the sweaty shirt, throwing it somewhere across the room. “Didn’t want to make you too flustered” and with that, his hands were puling your t-shirt over your head before trying to unclasp your bra, as your own needy hands unbuttoned his trousers. You struggle just a bit to get his pants down his sweaty thighs just far enough to allow you the access you so desperately crave. Harry groans as you play with the hem of his underwear, your lips never leaving each others during this whole process. “Stop teasing.. me..” Harry pants, finally getting the your bra off and flinging it somewhere behind him and hastily freeing you of your jeans and panties in one swift movement. You smirk into the kiss, you loved teasing him just a little. You relish for one last second in the tease before pushing his boxer briefs all the way down every so slowly. He moaned under your touch as you grazed your fingers back up his thigh before giving him an agonising slow pump that sent him fucking wild. “I told you to stop teasing” he growls, grabbing both yoru wrists and placing them above your head. He’s now in full control. 

“Now keep your hands there ok?” He instructs, staring deep into your eyes, sweat dripping down his cheeks. You bite your lip and nod your head, knowing that simple bite of the lip would send him even further. “Fuck you are beautiful” he says, before trailing his hands down your torso, your breathing getting heavier, before he reaches the spot where you need him the most. He delicately rubs the bundle of nerves as you bite your lip even hard trying to stifle a moan but failing miserably. “You like that huh?” he says, knowing exactly what he is doing. He lifts his fingers up to his mouth, taking two of his fingers in one by one before tracing them along your inner thigh, find their way to where you needed them. You were squirming, the craving almost unbearable. “Please Harry, I need y-ugh” before you could finish he slipped two fingers in. Pumping at a fast pace, your walls tightening around his fingers to exntend the pleasure, an endless string of moans coming from your mouth as you got closer and closer. He went deeper and deeper before hitting the spot. you writhed under his touch, bucking your hips up to get him to go even deeper. Your moans became more desperate as you tipped over the edge, reaching your high. “Good baby, I wanna see you let go, fuck you’re so beautiful” he encourages you to finish and you obey, your body tingling as you hit the orgasm you had been so desperately craving. “Good girl, good girl” he pulls his fingers out, now dripping in you. 

“I love you Harry” you pant, still coming down off the first high. Although you were satisfied, all you wanted to do was keep going. You grabbed his hand, putting his fingers in your mouth, sucking on them ever so gently. Yet another thing you knew sends him fucking crazy. You released his fingers, reaching up to grab his face, you crash your lips back on his, enjoying the taste of each other, as you kissed you reahed down to stroke him, he was stiff and ready. “You’re eager tonight aren’t you baby” he says, you can only hum in response, already coming back up to another high. “I need you Harry, all of you” and with that, he pumps himself twice before pushing himself in. You stretch around him, his length filling you, going impossibly deep. He thrusts hard and fast, desperately trying to hit his peak. Your lips separate, the movement too much as your head falls back, both of you moaning in absolute pleasure. “Fuck! Fuck Harry.. ughhh” you’re almost screaming as he continues to push deeper. You can tell he’s getting there, and he can tell you are too. Your moans get louder and louder, both of you panting as you reach your climaxes simultaneously. there is no doubt that anyone walking past could hear you, but both of you were so lost in the moment that neither of you cared. You buck your hips, desperately trying to hit your peak as he speeds up trying to do the same, you both hit your highs, releasing together. The euphoria of the orgasm washing over both of you. His thrusts slow and become sloppy, his eyes closed, a grin now adorning is lips. 

As you both come down, you relax into each other. As he slows, Harry’s body becomes heavy on top of yours, and you both sink into the couch. Your breaths steadying as he rests his head on your bare chest, his hand lazily rubbing at your exposed breast. “That was.. incredible” he says, and it was true. Post show sex was always the most fun. “Worth the wait?” you tease, a smirk on your lips and a cheesy grin on his, “definitely worth the wait. Although you really are a tease sometimes”. You chuckle “You actually love it though, I know you do”. You both remain there, satisfied, happy and more than a little bit sweaty. 

“I suppose we should go back out and see people huh? I have a feeling someone may be looking for us” Harry says, even though he would rather just stay in this moment. “Harry I’m pretty sure they know where we are, we weren;t very subtle, or quiet!” you giggle at the thought of everyone hearing what has just occurred but you honestly couldnt care less. “Thats true, but either way we should probably get up” he says, pushing himself up from the small couch, pulling you up with him as he goes. You two really were a sight to behold. Both of you naked, hair dishevled, sweat glistening on both of your skins. Even if they hadn’t have heard you, they’ll for sure be able to tell.

You both relcutantly get dressed, albiet with Harry’s suit looked more than a little messy, sneaking one last kiss before you unlock the door and head back to his dressing room. You pass a few people in the hallway, a pleasant smile and a few hellos before you both walk into the fairly busy dressing room. As you both enter, a few knowing glances are sent your way, your cheeks flush red while Harry smirks, relishing in what you;re sure he see;s as an accomplishment. You giggle and hide your face in his side as you both take a seat on the yet again crowded couch. “You two look a bit.. flustered” Jeff says, your cheeks glowing red again in embarassment before the group all start laughing, you and Harry chuckling along with them. Oh what a night it has been!

Hey lovelies! Two in one night! This is yet another installment of “The Words You Speak” series. I rarely write raucnhy content, I think this is only the second one I’ve ever properly written! It;s been sat in my drafts for quite a while but I though I may as well post it! As usual, requests are open so let me know what you want to read! Enjoy xxx 

[shipmistress9]

FTLOAP: Chapter 50: Just One Chance, Just One Breath

For The Love Of A Princess Masterpost

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AN:

! 3 YEARS! !

Today (April 3rd), it's been three years since I posted the prologue to this story. Meeting this anniversary served as a great deadline for me to finally finish editing this chapter.

Also, I can't believe it's really been that long! I never planned for this story to grow so big or to only write so little for it. But I'm going to power through, I still love this story very much.

I want to apologise it again took so long. January and February were bad for me, mentally, and I barely had enough energy to get through the day, let alone do just about anything in addition. Even the 'short' one-shots I posted in this time took me weeks to write instead of the usual one or two days. And I can't predict how long the next update might take, life is just chaos these days.

Now to this chapter. Finally, things are happening! I'm very excited about this chapter and the following event, and about your reactions, too.

This chapter's title comes from the song Far Away by Nickleback. It's one of my favourite songs all around, and the sentiment of this one quote felt very appropriate for this chapter.

. o O o .

There was a constant drizzle coming from the grey sky above them. It made Hiccup wish he was already wearing his warm travelling coat instead of the colourful attire that marked him as Eret’s squire so he could pull it tighter around himself. He couldn’t concentrate. Right at this moment, the King was giving his opening speech for the Dragon Hunt, with them all being packed and ready to get going any minute now. He should listen, should pay attention, if not for any important information then at least out of respect.

But no matter how hard he tried, he didn’t hear a single word; his heart was beating in his throat and drowned out every other sound. His eyes kept shifting away from the King too, constantly moving a bit to the left to where Astrid stood a step behind her father and beneath a hastily built canopy. As if she was too delicate to be subjected to the weather. She wore her mask of a pleasant smile, her eyes gliding around slowly, resting nowhere.

Gods, he hadn’t even left yet, but he missed her already! They hadn’t really talked since their saying goodbye in Eret’s suite two days ago. Yesterday had been busy with the journey to Oramond—which Astrid had been made to spend in a carriage—and she’d taken all her meals with Eret, Dagur, and their fathers. Frigga, they’d barely even seen each other, and he’d missed her so much. Could he really leave and endure several days without her? It felt so wrong.

But once again not being able to interact with her in over a day had reminded him of just how much he needed her in his life. It reminded him of why he had to follow through with their plan. They only had this one chance to ensure their future by following the path the Gods had wanted him to take, by doing what came naturally to him. He could do this! He had to…

Eventually, the King ended his speech with a reminder of the glory and the new life that was waiting for the winner—as if he needed that reminder. Then he, Eret, Dagur, and their small group of guards rode through the crowd to set out as the first participants. They all turned their heads as they rode past the King and the group around him. Silent nods were exchanged and to satisfy those watching, Eret even blew a kiss in Astrid’s direction. Her smile grew a little warmer, making Hiccup’s heart beat in his throat. Then her gaze glided on, over the rest of their group, and eventually, their eyes met. It lasted for less than one second before she looked away again, but to him, the emotions and the meaning in that brief exchange were tangible. Real, full of love and reassurance. The promise that they would soon be together again. It was a moment he would cherish, something to hold on to.

Then he took a last deep breath and turned away, toward the road ahead of them.

It felt like ripping out his heart.

. o O o .

Hiccup wasn’t sure whether to call it a lucky streak or just good preparation, but as everything worked out as planned, he was willing to go with either.

Both Eret and Dagur had been given a group of three guards from their fathers and a couple of pack horses. They rode hard—trying to bring as much distance between themselves and the other participants that would follow—and by noon, they reached their first stop.

It was a village of medium size. The people here obviously expected visitors, the hunt was no secret, after all, and it didn’t take long until the high lords and their entourage had gained rooms to stay in during the following days.

Hiccup spent an hour visibly busy with getting them settled in. He unpacked his and Eret’s things, arranged for them to get their food delivered to their rooms, and made sure that Cassie, Crusher, Squish, and the other horses were taken care of. But once he was sure that nobody paid him much attention anymore, he focussed on his main course again.

Back in the room he was supposed to share with Eret, he quickly changed his clothes; out of the flashy attire of a squire and into nondescript but practical travelling clothes made of wool and leather.

With his hand lingering on Astrid's key around his neck, he gave himself a moment to think of her. Now that there were actually dozens of miles between them, he felt their separation even more acutely. It felt as if something was tugging at him from the inside, urging him to get back to her, to hold her, to never let go. And a major part of him wanted nothing more than to give in to that urge, too. No matter how confident he was about this whole plan, Astrid had been right as well. Being apart from her was just wrong.

Taking a deep breath, he pushed these thoughts and feelings aside. He couldn’t afford to be distracted now. Now, he had to concentrate on his plan; being with her had to wait until he was back. Until he’d killed a dragon and returned to become a count. Until he had the land and title necessary to ask for her hand. Until he was truly worthy of her. Oh, he couldn’t wait.

Feeling a little lighter, he reached for the bundles he hadn’t unpacked earlier. They contained all he needed for the Hunt, some weapons, a few emergency rations of food, and more practical equipment he needed for a couple of days in the wilderness. And, most importantly, the bola shooter.

He threw the bags over his shoulder, then reached for the last thing he needed, the cloak Astrid’s servants had provided him with. In itself, it was an ordinary cloak, black with a blue border. What made it special however was the badge and sigil that came with it, marking the wearer as an official royal courier. It would allow him to change horses whenever he needed and ensured that he got a bed and a meal as long as he travelled along the road. He even had a letter to top off his disguise, complete with a wax seal of House Jag’r. He just hoped that he wouldn’t need this and that Eret wouldn’t get into trouble for providing him with this false message.

He didn’t pause to say his farewell to his cousin. Too easily someone could overhear them, could stop him, or could pin his leaving without permission on Eret. He and Dagur already had done enough for him; he didn’t want to risk any further trouble.

Instead, he sneaked into the stables and readied the two pack horses Eret and Dagur had brought, then left without anyone paying him any attention.

Being on the road then was a relief. It meant another part of their plan had worked perfectly. Hiccup rode for another two hours before he changed the tired horses at the next way station. A part of him wished he could take a break as well, to eat and to warm up at a hearth. He’d missed out on the meal he’d ordered for Eret in that inn and the drizzling rain was wearing on his strength. But taking a break wasn’t possible, not if he wanted to stay ahead of everyone else and out of reach of whoever might or might not be following him. So instead, he just switched to the well-rested horses a helpful stablehand provided him with and, chewing on some dried meat from his travelling rations, continued on his way up north.

He again got remounts in the evening, then rode on until long past nightfall before he stopped at an inn for the night. But despite being tired to the bones, from the second day spent in the saddle and the cool drizzle having crept through all his clothes, sleep didn’t come easily to him. His mind couldn’t find rest and for a long while, he just kept shifting from one side to the other. His thoughts kept circling around the task that lay ahead of him, around the dull sense of someone possibly following him, and around Astrid.

Gods, he missed her so much. What wouldn’t he give to hold her in his arms now, to listen to her soft breathing and breathe in her mayweed scent? Trembling, he curled into a tight ball, his hand pressed to his chest, and took a few deep and calming breaths. She was always with him; he reminded himself. Within him, their bond was tangible, pulsing like a second heart. It was warm and reassuring and real. Nothing would ever come between them, not even distance…

And soon, he would be with her for real again, too. Just a few days…

. o O o .

On the second day of the Hunt, Hiccup’s lucky streak still seemed to go on. Or that was what he tried to tell himself, at least. He was still tired, even after some hours of rest, but after a quick but tasty and filling breakfast, he was back on the road in no time. And while the rain had kept on during the night, it had stopped by now. The sky was still cloudy and the air cool, but thanks to the trees and hills around them, the wind didn’t affect him too much.

Not once did he encounter other participants of the Hunt, not by chance and not someone who might be searching for him either. Apparently, he was safe from any followers, and all Astrid’s worries had been for nothing.

Around noon, he reached another village. Although, it wasn’t even that, really, mostly a way station and a few additional buildings around it. But it was nonetheless an important place as it was the last station of his journey before he would have to leave the road and head into the swamplands.

“Now, things are getting serious,” he murmured to himself, then chuckled. Talking to himself had been a habit he’d picked up during his years of travelling on his own, to not feel quite as lonely. Almost a year had passed since then, but apparently, old habits died hard.

Pressing his legs against the horse’s sides, he rode toward what had to be the stables. “Hello?” he called, looking around for someone to take over his tired horses.

There was a grunt followed by heavy footsteps, then a burly man in a brown leather vest and with a bald head came into sight. “Oi, stranger.” He looked Hiccup over, his eyes pausing on the badge on Hiccup's cloak. “A messenger, eh? We don't see many of you around here. I’m Owen. You need horses, boy?”

Hiccup nodded, but then directly shook his head. “I do. But before I ride on... Do you have a tavern around here? Somewhere where I can get something to eat?”

“No tavern,” Owen said, but nodded toward a building on the other side of the road. “But you can get food in the main building over there. There’s not much to choose from, but my wife makes a fine stew. Just perfect for this weather.” He threw a glance past Hiccup and up into the grey sky and grimaced. “I’ll have your fresh horses ready when you need them.”

With a grateful smile, Hiccup took his bags from the horses’ backs and wandered over toward the other building. He couldn’t agree more, a good stew was just what he needed, warm and filling. When he stepped inside, he was greeted by a wave of wonderful warmth, the scent of hearty food, and a middle-aged woman of a comfortably rounded shape coming over from another room.

“Oh, a visitor!” she exclaimed, looking him over with curiosity. “But look at you. Come in, come in. You look exhausted, boy. What do you need? A room to rest?”

With a tired sigh, Hiccup shook his head. He had no time to take a rest, no matter how appealing that thought was. “Just something warm to eat, if you would be so kind. I need to be back on the road as soon as possible.”

She frowned in motherly disapproval, but nodded when he inconspicuously turned so she could see his messenger badge. “I see.”

She ushered him in and before he’d even sat down, she placed a steaming bowl of stew in front of him.

“Must be a mighty important message you’re delivering when you can’t even take a minor break.”

Hiccup smiled into his spoon. Even tired as he was, the food and the comfort of the hearth fire was enough to refuel at least some of his energy. And the woman had been kinder than she had to be, so giving her some gossip in exchange seemed only fair.

“I guess it is,” he replied between two mouthfuls. “A wedding invitation, if I’m informed correctly. From House Jag’r. I’m supposed to deliver it and return with an answer right away.” That was the story they’d decided on, giving him a good reason to head back in a couple of days as well. Even as he didn’t look forward to the question that would inevitably follow.

The woman’s eyes grew and she leaned a little closer. “A wedding invitation, you say? So the rumours are true then. The princess is going to marry our young Lord Eret?”

Hiccup dug his head and had to bite his lip to keep himself from scowling. Of course, these rumours would have spread by now. And the fondness in her voice didn’t surprise him, either; House Jag’r was well-liked among its subjects. It wasn’t this woman’s fault, that the idea of Astrid and Eret marrying didn’t fill him with the same joy as her.

“Maybe,” he suggested casually. “Or it’s about Lady Esther’s wedding.”

“Lady Esther is going to marry too?” the woman exclaimed, and she clapped her hands in delight. “Oh, what wonderful news. Are you sure it’s true?”

Smiling a little more genuine now, Hiccup gave something between a shrug and a nod. “That’s what I overheard, at least.”

She seemed excited, but before she could say more, another woman called her over from the room next door and she left him to eat in peace. Clearly in a good mood now, she probably couldn’t wait to spread the gossip.

Content to have made at least one person’s life brighter today, Hiccup finished his stew, left a coin as thanks for his meal, and then headed back to the way station outside. Grimacing at the gust of wind tearing at his cloak, he waited for an older boy—surely Owens son, judging by his looks—to bring him his horses. He remembered the woman’s offer of a room to rest, and dreamily imagined taking her up on it, to get some sleep until the weather—hopefully—turned more agreeable soon. But he didn’t have time for that. He had to stick to their plan, couldn’t make an exception just because the weather wasn’t playing along.

As he rode on, his thoughts kept circling around the task that lay ahead of him, and slowly, he became nervous. Over the past few days, he’d repeatedly assured Astrid and the others that he knew what he had to do, that he had the knowledge and training necessary to hunt and kill a dragon.

But the truth was… It was years since he’d been out to learn how to hunt dragons, another life. He’d only been a youth, accompanying the experienced hunters to learn just like his father had instructed and everyone had expected of him. But back then, he hadn’t been interested in the best techniques to track and find wild dragons. Instead, he’d only been excited about seeing and studying them, leading him to pay little attention to what the more experienced men had tried to teach him. Now, he could only hope that enough information had stuck with him nonetheless.

. o O o .

When Hiccup reached the swamps, what awaited him was just what he’d expected. A vast plain where grass-covered hummocks seamlessly merged into muddy lakes as far as the eye could see, with lonely trees or small corpses strewn in-between. Sadly, the weather still hadn’t changed, the air cold and close to freezing. So far, the forest had kept him mostly safe from the biting wind, but out here, he wouldn’t have that protection anymore. Even his travelling cloak could only do so much in shielding him.

Hiccup grimaced but tried to focus on any advantages the wind could give him. It would carry scents and sounds over far distances, but maybe it would also confuse his prey, making it hard for the beasts to locate him. If he managed to track one down in the first place…

With a tired grunt, he dismounted and took the horses’ reins to lead them behind him as he made his way deeper into the swamps. He needed them to carry his equipment, but carrying him over the muddy ground would needlessly tire them out. So he went on foot, regularly leaving the animals fixed to a branch or rock when he found one to search the area for any signs that a dragon might be close by.

But there were none.

When dusk came, Hiccup was starting to feel anxious. For hours, he’d been wandering through these swamplands now, but not once had he spotted even the hint of wings larger than those of a hawk on the horizon, let alone found any traces of a dragon being nearby. And he was exhausted . The wetness from the ground had soaked into his trousers, his boots, and up his cloak, making it even heavier. Dragging him down. The sky had cleared, but without the sun that only meant the temperature was dropping even lower, further wearing out his remaining strength. And in addition, the three days of travelling hadn’t done his leg any good to begin with. By now, every step was painful, his back hurting, and his limps felt like jelly. He stumbled and fell more often the farther he wandered through the swamps, and soon, his hands were muddy and cold. Numb.

And still, there were no signs of any dragons. Which meant that he was wasting his time here anyway.

With a tired sigh, Hiccup sank down onto a damp rock and buried his face in his hands. Gods, he was so exhausted. He didn’t want to waste any time by just sitting here, couldn’t really afford to do so. But he couldn’t go on like this, either. He needed to rest , something to eat and some hours of sleep. Which probably was the more sensible thing to do, anyway. Yes, he would break off for today and get some rest. And tomorrow, he would travel farther north along one of the marked paths. Maybe he would have more luck there.

“It’s the only sensible thing to do,” he muttered to himself, reluctantly resigning to this plan. “But first, I need to find a dry place to make camp. And preferably something warm to eat…” The clear sky promised a freezing night, warmth would be essential.

Gathering his remaining strength, Hiccup fought himself back up on his feet and kept going. He wandered further through the swamps, but now, he wasn’t looking for hints or trails of any dragons anymore. Instead, he was looking for prey to hunt. A deer would be nice, enough meat to keep him full through the coming days. But just a rabbit would do, too. He still had some dried rations in his pack, but he would only touch those if he had no other choice.

This time, his search didn’t take long. It was less than half an hour, the sun gone and the night illuminated by stars only, until he spotted movement in the high grass ahead of him. The rustling of the blades of grass was distinctly different from that of the wind, and it seemed as if his tiny lucky streak was still going; from the size of it, it had to be a deer and not a rabbit.

He stopped, grimacing as he found nothing to tie the horses to, but it couldn’t be helped. He wouldn't be gone for long anyway. As quietly as he could, he took one bag off the nearer horse to reach the bow and quiver strapped beneath. Then, with one arrow loosely nocked, he sneaked up the hummock behind which the deer had disappeared.

Slowly, without making the slightest noise, Hiccup made his way to the top and looked for the deer. He’d heard the rustling of grass from the dip on the other side just a moment ago, the animal had to be here somewhere. He looked around, squinting to see in the near-complete darkness of the night—but when he spotted the beast, he barely believed his eyes.

From one moment to the next, Hiccup froze in fear, eyes wide and unable to move. The animal that stood with its head bent down to drink from a shallow lake just a few feet away from him was not a deer.

It was a dragon. And not just any dragon, no. Hiccup had never seen one of these before, but he’d heard stories and had seen drawings in old books. Deep black and almost invisible in the night, Hiccup could only make out its sleek body and powerful wings by the starlight reflecting on its shiny scales. A long tail with spiky tail fins, some odd earlike protrusion on its head, it was—

A Night Fury!

The ultimate prize!

Hiccup’s heart began to race uncontrolled. This was why he was here! For whatever reason the Gods had led his way here, this was it. It had to be! The legendary beast from the old stories, so tightly linked to his name. This couldn’t be a coincidence. Now, all he had to do was incapacitate the monster with the bola shooter, and—

And the bola shooter was still at the bottom of one of his bags, back with the horses.

At the last moment, he remembered to suppress his groan; alerting the dragon to his presence could have fatal consequences. But that was the problem. There was no way he could go back and return with the shooter without the beast hearing him. It was a miracle that he’d managed to sneak up on this stealthy dragon, to begin with.

His mind was working at a rapid speed. Only seconds had passed since he spotted the dragon, but it was unlikely that he would get much more time. Any moment now, it would notice him, hear or scent him. He had to do something now.

His eyes dropped to the bow and nocked arrow in his hands. A horribly insufficiant weapon to fight against a dragon, but it was all he had.

Feverishly, he tried to remember his lessons.

A downed dragon is a dead dragon.

The wings! If he incapacitated the beast’s wings and it wasn’t able to fly, couldn’t flee and could only attack him from the ground—then he might have a chance. He carried a hunting knife strapped to his belt; not much but, it could work. It had to!

Hiccup forced himself to calm down his breathing and lifted the bow. Archery wasn’t his greatest skill, but the shot should be easy enough. He just had to tear a big-enough hole into one of the leathery wings, that was all. Manageable from this short distance. Right?

Adrenalin made his hands shake as he pulled and aimed. But he only had this one chance. So he took a deep breath and held it, forcing himself to calm down. For Astrid! he thought, and released the arrow.

And for a brief moment, Hiccup thought he’d made it.

The dragon screamed—in pain or surprise, Hiccup couldn’t tell—and whirled around. Hastily, Hiccup dropped the bow and pulled his knife instead, and in rapid speed, instructions he’d thought long forgotten popped up in his mind. He had to keep moving, had to circle the beast, somehow corner it and if possible make it use up his shots. Now that it wasn’t able to fly, he had to attack its other wing, its legs, weaken it, and—

The Night Fury roared in his direction, its large black wings stretched wide. And to Hiccup’s dismay, they were unharmed. He’d missed. Cold dread filled his stomach, but he had no time to think about his failure. For the beast had spotted him. For an endless heartbeat, its cold eyes all but pierced him. Then it jumped into the air, wings covering the entire sky, and screamed. Purple light gleamed in its throat, growing brighter and brighter and—

Hiccup reacted without thinking. At the last moment, he threw himself to the side and out of the way of the dragon’s fiery breath, and the blast of purple light missed him by inches. However, instead of landing in the grass as he’d anticipated, the world was suddenly spinning around Hiccup, leaving him without orientation. Up became down, the ground turned into thin air, and as Hiccup tumbled down the hillside, he could hear the beast screech angrily.

The landing was hard, jarring. Icy darkness closed around him, the momentary numbness only pierced by a sudden sharp pain in his left leg. He screamed as something cut deep into his flesh and doubled over to reach for his leg, but jerked back a moment later, spluttering and gasping.

For an endless heartbeat, there was only chaos; the pain and cold made Hiccup blind to what happened around him. There was another scream from the dragon, whinnying from the horses, and a noise that sounded like a sudden gust of wind—and then, only silence.

With a low groan, Hiccup tried to sit up. It took him a few tries; the ground was muddy and slippery. He’d landed in a shallow pool, and the water was icy. It stung like countless needles and made his fingers go numb. His clothes, already uncomfortably damp before, now clung to his skin. They dragged him down, and crawling up the embankment was more difficult than it should be.

Between the pain and the freezing water, Hiccup had forgotten everything else around him. But once he was back on—relatively—dry land, he remembered that he wasn’t alone. Where was the dragon? Was it watching him, waiting in some shadow and ready to attack again? He looked around frantically, eyes darting here and there, with fear blocking his throat and making it hard to breathe. He was defenceless, wouldn’t be able to dodge another attack in his current state.

But no attack came. The surrounding shadows were empty, the dim starlight enough to see at least that much.

Slumping in on himself, Hiccup let out an exhausted sigh. The threat seemed to be over, for the moment at least. And if the dragon was still around… well, then there was little he could do to defend himself anyway. A quick search showed him that he must have lost his knife during his fall, and as poor of a choice of weapon it had been, without it, he felt even worse.

Accepting that he wasn’t in immediate danger, he took a minute to catch his breath, then shifted to inspect his leg. The sharp pain made him grimace. Adrenalin and the cold water had numbed the pain after the initial burst, but now it became nearly unbearable—and horribly familiar.

Hissing in pain, he peeled back the torn fabric and tried to inspect the wound as best he could without light. His fingers were shaking and he had to grit his teeth, but after a minute of prodding and probing, he had a relatively good idea of the state his leg was in. The wound was a clean and straight cut, matching the edges of the fabric. It wasn’t so deep that it was directly threatening, but he would need to treat it and pray that the wound didn’t get infected.

“Oh, wonderful, ” he cursed under his breath, as it dawned on him what must have cut him. “Just perfect! I manage to dodge the dragon’s attack, only to fall into my own weapon. Typical! I’m… I’m such an idiot!”

With a hopeless groan, he let his head fall against the knee of his good leg, feeling a horrible sense of déjà vu.

The night and the cold wind. The failed fight against a dragon. His injured leg.

It was all happening again.

But no! No, he wouldn’t mess everything up, not again. There was still time, he could still find and kill a dragon. He hadn’t failed, not until he gave up.

Gritting his teeth, Hiccup fought himself up to wobbly stand on his good leg. This new injury had hit his already weaker leg, which was good. Maybe his sort-of-lucky streak wasn’t over just yet, despite the mess he was in. He just had to focus on the positive things...

But the wound needed tending, and he was in dire need of some dryer clothes, too. Looking around, Hiccup found that his weird luck really hadn’t run out yet. Only a few steps away, he spotted a long branch. Crooked and not as strong as he would have preferred, it was still sufficient enough as an improvised crutch. It didn’t make walking easy, but at least it became a little more bearable.

Slowly, he made his way around the hummock to where he’d left the horses. In one of the saddlebags, he had clean cloth for bandages and a small flask of willow bark tincture. It probably wasn’t enough for a wound as big as this one, but it would have to be enough for now. However, even with his crude crutch, the way was difficult, especially on this uneven ground. Hiccup hobbled more than he was walking, putting as little weight on the injured leg as was possible. Time seemed to stretch endlessly as he went on and on, forcing himself to endure the pain.

Just a little longer...

Just until he’d reached the horses, then he could rest…

The way around the hummock seemed to take longer than was logically possible, but Hiccup passed that off as fatigue and the slight daze he was in with the pain and after the shock of the dragon attack. He felt like the beast had still to be around somewhere, and it took him way too long to realise his mistake.

The horses were gone.

He’d possibly rounded the hummock for the second time when he spotted a leather bag lying on the ground a small distance away from him. Hobbling closer, he recognised it as his own and after throwing a glance around was sure that this was the place he’d left the horses before he’d approached the Night Fury. Except that the horses were nowhere to be seen.

“ Of course, they aren’t here anymore!” he groaned, slumping down to the ground next to the lonely bag. “The dragon probably scared them and they ran away. And I run around like an idiot, looking for...” He trailed off, laughing at himself and shaking his head. “I’m such an idiot…”

Hiccup leaned against a rock and gave himself a few moments to regain his strength. He needed a rest… Just a moment to breathe, to gather his thoughts.

First, he had to find the horses. Maybe there was another silver lining waiting for him and they’d only run a little further away from the fight. Maybe, he could recapture them easily.

With more effort than he liked, he climbed back on top of the hummock, looking around, searching. By now, the moon had come out, a full moon, bathing the landscape around him in cool silvery light. But no matter how hard he looked, he couldn’t spot the horses anywhere. Instead, he spotted a patch of burned grass nearby, right next to where he’d left the lonely bag. He let out another groan. If the dragon’s attack had hit this close to the horses, it was no wonder they’d fallen into a panic and run. They were probably still running at this very moment, and were irrecoverably lost to him by now. Walking around looking for them wasn’t just nearly impossible in his current state, it was entirely useless, too.

“Shit…”

The curse came as merely a weak groan. Without these horses, it would be difficult to get fresh ones at a way station. And without horses in general, it would be tricky to make it back to Eret in time for the Dragon Hunt. If he was lucky, the messenger’s badge and a good story of how he’d lost the horses would be enough but—

Then the full range of this development hit him. The horses hadn’t just been meant to carry him back.

“SHIT!”

This time, he yelled. With the horses gone, he had no equipment anymore either. No bandages or medication for his leg. No dried food for emergencies. No oiled blankets against the weather. In those bags had been everything, clothes, equipment—his weapons!

Burying his face in his hands and pulling at his hair, he let out an inarticulate scream. Astrid had been right, after all. He should have listened to her. This whole idea had been madness right from the beginning. He never should have left her side. No matter how bad the odds, holding her hand when they tried to convince Daniel to support them… that would have been leagues better than dying out here, alone. Never to see her again…

“No…” He looked up, a small flicker of determination blooming in his chest amidst the ocean of despair inside him. “No, I won’t give up! I… I promised that everything would be all right…”

Behind his mind’s eye, an image of Astrid appeared. He’d barely ever seen her truly angry, but he could imagine so well how she would look, with her fists in her sides, leaning forward a little and giving him a well-deserved scolding. He could almost hear her, telling him that she’d told him so, that he was an idiot for going through with this stupid plan, and that he should have listened to her. Oh, what would he give to hear her voice for real now… Even if she were to yell at him, he wouldn’t mind.

With a weak smile on his lips, he raised his hand to press it to his chest. There it was, the pulsing of their bond, warm and reassuring. Urging him on. He wasn’t defeated, not yet.

Looking around the top of the hummock, he spotted his bow where he’d dropped it before. That was something, at least. Taking it, he made his way back to the one bag of equipment he had left. Every movement hurt, but that didn’t really matter. All that mattered was that he wouldn’t let himself drown in self-pity now. He had to do the best of his situation, no matter how bad it may seem.

Just like with the injury being on his already weakened leg, he found that he was lucky in that of all the bags he’d originally brought with him, this one was the one he still had now. It contained little that was of use to him right now. A woollen blanket and a spare tunic occupied most of the space within—both things he would appreciate once he’d found a dry place to rest—but so much more importantly was what he’d stored at the very bottom of this bag. Hidden beneath the layers of cloth should anyone have taken a look, he’d stored part of his weapons. A few additional arrows for the bow, a spare dagger…

And the bola shooter.

Apparently, the Gods were still on his side. He still had a chance. The thought was reassuring, enough to keep the rising hopelessness at bay. He hadn’t lost, yet.

Studiously, he pushed all other problems aside and only focused on the next step. First, it was the spare shirt he needed. Putting it on beneath his other dripping clothes would be pointless, but at least it was clean. Using the dagger from the bag, since he’d lost the other one somewhere in that muddy puddle, Hiccup cut the shirt apart and used the cloth to put an improvised bandage around his leg. Not perfect, but it was better than nothing. At least it helped staunch the bleeding for the moment.

“All right,” he muttered to himself as he lifted the by now damp bag off the ground and onto his back. “On to looking for a place to rest. Maybe I’m even lucky and I find something to eat after all.”

. o O o .

Eventually, Hiccup’s lucky streak ran out. It had to happen sooner or later, but he still cursed that it had to happen now.

What he needed more than anything else was a fire to warm his body and to dry his clothes, a place that wasn’t too damp and wood and flint and stuff to light it. Food or treatment for his leg would be a welcome bonus, but those could wait until tomorrow. First, he had to make it until then. And that proved to be more difficult than he’d anticipated.

After last night’s rain, finding dry wood or a dry spot to rest was all but impossible. With the injury on his leg, he only made slow progress, the pain getting worse with every step. More than once, he cursed having lost the horses, not just because of his lost equipment but because them carrying him now would have been an invaluable help. But it was more than just that. The exhaustion of the long days of travel eventually caught up with him, and the blood-loss combined with his wet clothes draining his strength did the rest to leave his mind clouded and fuzzy.

Two times, he noticed the movement ahead of him too late, a rabbit disappearing before he even had the chance to ready his bow. But even as his stomach grumbled, he found it more and more difficult to care.

His crutch hadn’t lasted long, had broken and left a long gash on his forearm in the process. Since then, he kept stumbling and falling, jarring his wound even further. And every time he fell, it became harder to get up again. He was beyond exhaustion by now. The cold wind was tearing at his clothes and slowly draining him of any energy that was left, cutting into his hands and face, and oftentimes made it hard to keep his eyes open at all. Every step was agony, his arms and legs were growing weaker with every minute, and fighting himself back up on his feet seemed more and more futile.

What even was the point? What was he trying to achieve by stumbling through this hostile landscape? Killing a dragon? Earning himself the right to be at Astrid’s side? Regaining his honour, proving to himself that he was not a failure? How was he supposed to do any of that here?

Maybe it was impossible, especially the last point.

Maybe, he was nothing but a failure, after all…

The next time his tired feet got caught and he landed face-first in the dirt, he couldn’t find the strength to stand up anymore. Maybe he should just stay here, sleep for a few hours. His skin was so numb that he wasn’t even feeling the cold anymore. And he was so tired...

Somewhere in the depth of his mind, he knew that these were not good signs. It meant hypothermia, meant that he most likely wouldn’t wake up again if he fell asleep, if he didn’t get up right now. But he was just too exhausted to move, every part of him. His body, his arms and legs, his head, and most of all his mind. Everything was so heavy and slow, so exhausting. Maybe, he should just stay here. Maybe he should give up…

It was then, in that moment of resignation, when he sensed it. A whiff of mayweed reached his nose, seemingly out of nowhere, and with it came the memories. An impression of golden hair. Eyes as endless as the sky. The ghostly touch of fingers, so soft yet also strong. And a voice sweeter than the sweetest music.

You promised . You promised that you ’ d come back to me. Please, Hiccup. I… I can ’ t imagine a world without you in it.

Groaning, Hiccup rolled onto his back.

“I… promised…”

Moving was difficult. His arms and legs were so numb he barely felt them anymore. But he had to get up. He’d promised Astrid that he’d come back to her, and it was a promise he was going to keep, no matter what. Grimacing and with a shaking hand, he reached for his left leg and pressed his thumb into the wound.

“F-fuck!”

Hiccup screamed. The pain was intense, burning hot along his nerves and bringing tears to his eyes. But it also ripped away the haze around his thoughts and brought him the clarity he needed.

He couldn’t stay here, couldn’t give up and die. He had to go on, to live. For her. Sitting up, he found himself halfway up a low hummock, the ground here slightly dryer. Tentative hope bloomed in his chest, but this wasn’t good enough. Maybe if he found another hummock with some trees, some ripped-off branches and something to shield him from the wind and further rain…

Clinging to that hope, he crawled toward the hummock’s top. By now, the moonlight was flooding the land around him, so maybe the raised position would help him find what he was looking for; any form of shelter against the weather would do.

What he saw, however, made him doubt his sanity again. There, less than half a mile away, was the glow and smoke of a fire.

Hiccup stared in wonder and disbelief. With his eyes clinging to the flickering light, he even thought that he could feel the fire’s warmth on his skin, smelled the scent of food.

He made an unconscious step toward the promising campfire but then paused again. If he truly went there… what would await him? If he was lucky— very lucky一then it was just a group of travellers, hopefully friendly enough to share what they had with a stranger in the night. But he wasn’t fooling himself. Who would wilfully travel through the swamps, and this far off the paths no less? No, far more likely was that somehow other participants of the Dragon Hunt had found their way here as well. And if that was the case…

Biting his lip, Hiccup pondered his options. Going to this camp might very well end in him getting killed on the spot. No matter whether those were the same people who’d killed Snotlout’s squire or whether they were regular participants and trying to win County Ravenledge; if they saw him as a rival then they wouldn’t hesitate to get rid of him. After all, out here, nobody would ever find out what really happened. But if he didn’t go to this camp…

Hiccup’s shoulders slumped in resignation. If he didn’t go to that camp, then he was as good as dead. There was no point in deluding himself; without the warmth of a fire, shelter and care for his wound, and maybe even some food, he wouldn’t survive the night.

“I promised,” he murmured into the breeze, his decision made. “I promised I’d come back to you. And I will, Astrid. Nothing will come between us. Not even death.”

So he made his way toward the campfire in the distance. He was still just as tired and cold and in pain as before, but the hope that maybe he would survive the night after all gave him the strength he needed. The hope that he might see Astrid again.

However, when he reached the edge of the light, he paused, confused. As far as he could tell, the camp was empty. There was the fire, burning brightly, a shelter made of oilcloth, and to the side stood two horses tied to a tree. There was even something roasting over the fire, two rabbits if he wasn’t mistaken. But whoever had hunted them or had built this camp, they were nowhere to be seen.

Maybe it was a trap. But at that moment, Hiccup didn’t care anymore. All he cared about was the heat of the fire beckoning him over, the scent of meat that made his stomach churn.

Slowly, he came closer, eyeing the shadows for any hidden movement even as he had no idea how he was supposed to react to an attack. Stumble against them and hope they would hit their head on a rock when they fell? Yeah, that would totally work...

With a heavy sigh, he slumped down by the fire. Warmth soaked into the skin of his face and hands, and with his weight off his leg, it already felt so much better than just moments before. He eyed the roasted rabbits but left them untouched. He was no thief, after all, still hoped the people here might help him. Instead, he just curled into a ball and sat as close to the fire as was possible without burning himself, and stared into the dancing flames.

Time passed—minutes or hours, he didn’t know anymore—until the sound of footsteps made his head whirl around. With wide eyes, he gazed at the figure emerging from the shadows, his heart pounding. He recognised them immediately, their armour, and knew exactly who was standing in front of him.

At that moment, he knew that he was dead.

. o O o .

AN: Soooooo... I'm incredibly curious about the reactions to this chapter! Finally, we met a dragon, if only briefly. But Hiccup is in a bad shape, not good for hunting down a dragon. And who was it he met there at the end? So many questions...

I'm already working on the next update, but as always, no promises for when it might be done...

Next Chapter

* - . - * - . o O o . - * - . - *

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Fading away. —

Pairing: Jason Grace x Roman!DaughterofPluto!Reader

Sumary: after moths of over working, a colapse makes you get into a coma and reflect on your feelings.

Warnings: coma, angst, Pluto as a caring dad, fluff at the end.

Words: +-3k.

A/N: This is my first Percy Jackson Franchise fanfiction, so take it easy on me. This is also my biggest and favourite one. I hope you like this! My requests are always open.

(Y/N) (L/N) had a good reason to hate Jason Grace. How could she not? Jason was so annoying, self centred, selfish, stubborn and worse of all? He dated Piper McLean. Piper was great, (Y/N) knew that and they seemed happy together. But, still, he chose Piper, not (Y/N), his girlfriend back at Camp Jupiter, who he totally forgot about. How come Percy remembered Annabeth but Jason wouldn't remember (Y/N)? And when he recovered his memory, he chose Piper. But she also loved him still, and seeing him hurt like a bullet going straight through her heart. She decided to spend a year at Half-Blood Camp to stay with her half-brother Nico Di Angelo when Gaea were defeated. She thought she could manage to see him almost every day, but she couldn't. So she started doing anything to get her mind occupied. Going on meaningless quests, travelling to New York randomly, volunteering for literally any service in the camp and barely sleeping — because sleeping meant dreams.

"It doesn't have to be like that, (Y/N)." Her brother gave her another shot of Nectar. The sunlight that entered Hades' cabin was leaving slowly as they talked, (Y/N) leaned on her bed watching her fingertips become solid again.

"I'll learn how to do it right and I promise I won't push myself too much, but I can't stop practicing." She avoided eye contact with Nico, feeling ashamed of herself. After all, she was supposed to be the one taking care of him, since she was older. She came back from a "quest" for her father, that was staying a weekend on the Underworld. She started using Shadow Travel to get there. The problem? She had no idea how hard it was, and she almost died every time. He sighted.

"I'm not talking about Shadow Travel. You should talk to Jason and sort this out. You're almost killing yourself everyday doing the craziest stuff just to keep your mind off him. He already broke up with Piper, what's stopping you now? I'm your brother and it pains me to see you suffering, I won't just sit and watch while you literally desapear." He got up and walked to the door. The (h/c) girl forced a smile so he believed she was fine. Nico left the cabin.

After hours reflecting and thinking, she heard the trumpets that announced the convocation to a game of Capture the Flag. Since she was feeling better, she changed her clothes and walked outside. The teams were: cabins 1, 4, 5, 9, 12, 14, 18, 21, 23, 27, 28, 29 vs. cabins 2, 6, 7, 10, 11, 13, 15, 16, 20, 24, 25, 26. They started the game. (Y/N) had to protect the boundary with a kid from Hipnos' cabin while a group attacked the opponent's flag and another protected their territory and their flag. Everything was going as planned, she hadn't seen anyone yet. Out of the sudden, she saw a blond guy running in their direction with a sword. Oh hell no, Jason Grace wouldn't attack her like that. But he did.

"What the hell?!" She screamed, reacting to the blade flying in her direction. Her teammate was asleep. She defended herself with her own sword and counterattacked. He invested against her leg, trying to make her fall. Her instincts took place, she jumped, attacked again and they started a meaningless battle. Jason looked the same as always. He was almost the same Jason that used to take her on cute dates in New Rome. But he fought like a greek. And that was when it hit her, he changed. The mixture of love and hate made her loose her senses for a bit, giving Jason the lead. He focused on her leg but hesitated to hit it, giving her time to get back on the fight. She knocked him to the floor, her foot on his chest and her blade on his neck, when she heard footsteps approaching quickly. Of course. It was a trap. She turned around and saw a son of Hebe holding her team's flag running, followed by two daughters of Hephaestus. She grabbed a knife from her belt and threw it to his leg, hitting exactly where she wanted. She then grabbed Jason's blade and Shadow Travelled. For a moment everything was fine, while she drowned into darkness, but then she couldn't get out. She saw her father's face mixed in the dark. He raised his hand and touched her face, than she was back at the forest. Realising not even a second had gone through, she attacked the — injured — boy and the two gigantic girls at the same time. She wasn't really expecting to defeat them, just trying to win some time so, hopefully, someone would come help her. The boy dropped the flag and got a small sword. The two girls had hammers... oh. The three of them attacked at the same time and she protected herself with Jason's sword, which flew away. She was out of hopes when a figure appeared beside her and started fighting them.

"What are you doing here?! You're not supposed to help me, we're enemies, remember?" She said, fighting Hebe's son.

"I guess you're welcome then." Jason replied smiling, fighting the hammers-girls. (Y/N) sighted in annoyance. Seconds later, her teammates came running from the enemies' territory with a flag and the three-people group surrendered. Everyone started screaming and celebrating. (Y/N)'s head hurt with the noise and she looked to her brother, feeling numb.

"Hey, can we talk?" Jason said, getting in front of her with a big smile. He was proud of himself for helping her? Of course he was. He was going to take all the credit for her team's win. The anger rose inside of her burning everything. She furrowed her eyebrows and with the last energy that remained in her body, she tried to Shadow Travel for the perhaps hundredth time that day.

She fell into the darkness while feeling her body desapear quickly. Her heart was very accelerated but then it stopped. She saw herself at the barks of Lete's river. I'm dead., she thought. The desperation started taking over. She remembered the face of all her friends. Her siblings, Hazel and Nico. Her mother. Her best friend Reyna. Camp Jupiter. New Rome. The Lar Vitellius. Lares? Lares! Maybe she could go back as a ghost! She would at least see her friends again.

"Didn't expect to see you this soon." A voice said with humor. She turned around, as always enlighten by her father's presence. But his face was sad. Not the everyday-sad-Pluto, but the my-daughter-just-died-sad-Pluto.

"Am I d-... dead?" The anxiety forbid her from crying in front of her father. The one she never knew and once she did, she didn't want to disappoint him.

"Yes and no. You see, my darling, there are things more powerful then death. Right now, your physical being is exhausted from travelling through darkness and light — which I told you not to, but we'll talk about this later, you have a decision to make. You're body is surrendering to Death out of hopelessness. But your soul, on the other hand, still fights for the heart beating in your chest. And your conscious, the controller of both body and soul, has to decide which one of them you'll support right now. As Lord of the Death that's all I can say to you. But as your father, I would like to say that we have a room for you in the castle, if you'd like that. And also, I feel obligated to show you what is happening on Earth." When he finished his words, an image formed in the air, sort of an Iris message, but no one saw them. (Y/N) saw herself laying on the grass, surrounded by some campers, Nico and Jason.

She was watching them from above. Jason put two fingers on her neck, trying to feel her pulse. She — the one in the Underworld — gasped as the blond boy whispered 'nothing'. She glanced at her father, who had a pained expression as he stared at Nico freaking out. Her brother had his hands on her chest and was murmuring something in greek. Then, he opened his eyes, filled with tears of desperation, and glanced at Jason, who didn't look any better. She wanted to scream and go back to up there, but her voice wouldn't come out of her throat.

"Half of her is already gone." Nico struggled to say. Everyone around gasped. "I can't Shadow Travel with her, it- it would k-kill the other half..."

"Let's take her to the Infirmary. Everything's gonna be fine. She'll be okay." Will Solace had appeared in the crowd and kneed down to take (Y/N) in the arms, being helped by the other two. As they walked, (Y/N) held herself in her arms, sobbing. She didn't want to die, not like that. The image faded away and Pluto hugged her. He never did that before. She left out all her emotions through the cry. Her father caressed her back and gently kissed the top of her head.

"Now you see, my child, what those on Earth are going through. You have a family up there. And if you'd ask me, Jason Grace is a good person, even being a son of my brother. You have a choice, so make it wisely." Pluto said, not backing away from the hug. She nodded and he immediately knew what her choice was. "You know I'd love to have you here with me, but I'd love even more to see you happy. Don't be reckless. And listen to your brother. You don't have to worry to come see me, I'll make sure to visit you during your recovery." As he said that, a white door appeared out of nowhere. "Here's your carpool." The girl started to walk to the door, when she heard Pluto say: "(Y/N) I lo-... Good luck." She smiled to him and went through into the door. It felt like eons in the nothingness. She felt so much pain all over her body. Then she gained conscience. She didn't knew how long it had passed. She also couldn't open her eyes or say anything, but she knew she was laying down something comfortable, a bed, perhaps. But she could hear perfectly well.

"... and I'm so sorry you had to die for me to gain the courage to say this. Please come back to us... Come back to me. Nico barely leaves this room and nor do I, Will had to force him to go eat. It's not the same without you, (Y/N/N), it really isn't." Jason's words gave her the urge to cry, but she couldn't. It was like her body had shutdown completely. She felt his warm hands on her cold ones and after that, a door was opened. Footsteps. Only one person. Jason didn't move. Someone sat down next to them.

"Dad- I mean, Hades said she will be okay." It was Nico's voice. He sounded extremely tired.

"Didn't he say that last month?" Grace was annoyed, but he didn't stop holding her hand.

"I know, I wish I could do more... I'm... I'm sorry Jason." The blond sighted.

"I should be the one to be saying that. I know there's nothing else to do. I'm sorry for putting the blame on you. It's just- if we've talked before, nothing of this would have happened. If only I was brave enough..." (Y/N) felt weak and her consciousness was back at nothing again. When she heard something again, it looked like a lot of time had passed by, but she wasn't sure at all. Jason's voice was happy as he told her his plans to the future.

"I realised you would like to work with me training the legion. You're obviously skilled and the payment is quite good. And I've heard they are planning to build a village here as well, but I don't know if you-..." Every time she tried to stay conscious, she felt weaker. 'Rest', her father's voice said inside of her head, so she let herself.

Some time...? A long time...? She didn't knew. But the next time she heard, she was way stronger. She waited until then, so she could stay longer and try to understand her emotions. She heard almost an entire day. Her friends entered and left cabin 13 — she found out that she was there. Some of them talked "to" her, some just sat there in silence. When alone, Nico talked a lot about Will Solace. (Y/N) smiled mentally. Then Jason entered. She could already recognise the sound he made walking. He sat beside her bed and held her hand, as usual.

"Hello, princess. You look better." She reunited all the strength she had storage and sent it all to her right hand. She softly squeezed Jason's hand, for a small portion of second, trying to say 'hi'. She felt exhausted. He gasped.

"She just squeezed my hand!" He screamed, laughing. Nico jumped out of his bed, laughing as well. They both stared at her, waiting for more. "You're there, right? I knew you were! It's been long months, but you're getting better. Don't work too hard. We'll see each other soon, don't worry." He kissed her forehead. After that, it was easy for her to let go and dive into her sleep again.

She was slowly getting better. She noticed her comas were smaller now, and she got stronger every time. She started communicating by squeezing people's hand. One time for 'yes' and two times for 'no'. But it still was exhausting. She met with her father a couple times through dreams, but it never lasted long. She was sick of it. She wanted to jump out of the bed and run through all the camp. She was alone with Jason, as he talked about the last time he went to Camp Jupiter, telling every change. She slowly forced herself to open her eyes. It wasn't for too long, just enough for her to see the big smile he had while talking, her favourite blond hair and how he gesticulated while speaking. By that time, her feelings were completely lined. She declined her childishness and stubbornness to accept the fact that she obviously loved him. Her lips were able to form a small smile. He hadn't noticed her yet. I can do this, she thought.

"J." She whispered for the first time in five months. Her eyes were already closed again. He gasped.

"Did you just say J? That's me! I'm here, i'm right here, love. Can you hear me?" She squeezed his hand one time. Yes. He chortled. "You're so strong. I miss you so much." He started softly crying. She squeezed his hand two times. No. Don't cry, she wanted to say. "Alright, 's fine, 's fine. Gods, you're coming back. I bet Aphrodite is watching us closely." He chuckled but suddenly stopped. "I forgot we haven't talked about that yet, i'm sorry. I don't wanna be intrusive, you know. It's just, by what Nico has told me, well, you still liked me." She squeezed two times. "That's... that's great, love. But don't worry about that just yet. You should take some rest now, my love."

Five days. She had woken up every single one of them, but only listening. No squeezes, no talking, no looking. Just storing strength. She knew she was close to fully waking up. She was already able to keep track of the days. It was a Sunday, the day she received the most visits. It should be morning, because she only heard Nico's snorting. She slowly opened her eyes. The same place. Different clothes. She wondered who had changed them. Perhaps Will did. She systematically moved her arms, pushing herself to sit. Her back was laying at wall. She took a deep breath. It was going fine. She wanted to wake Nico up, but she decided to wait to see if she would be able to actually stay awake. About an hour later, Nico woke up by himself. He yawned and turned to her bed. She looked at him with a big smile. He jumped out of bed.

"Holy shit, (Y/N)! You're up! How- Wait! I need to- Wait! Don't fall asleep, I'll be right back!" She blinked slowly to sign 'ok'. He was back moments running later with a bunch of teenagers in pyjamas. They all froze at the door, staring at her. Hazel, Frank, Annabeth, Percy, Jason and even Piper. Hazel was the first one to wake up from the trance. She ran to her sister and hugged (Y/N).

"Ouch." She managed to say, reacting to the tight hug that made her head hurt.

"Right, sorry! I forgot. Wait, you speak!" Hazel answered and laughed. All of the others joined in, amazed by her friend, and started talking, telling everything she had missed. (Y/N) couldn't speed properly, only a few words like 'hi', 'ow', 'miss' and 'food'. Later that day, Will came to check on her. He said everything looked just fine, but that she should rest.

"Hey." Zeus' son said, once they were alone.

"Hi."

"Gods, it's so good to finally hear you again. I've talked to myself for a long time." They giggled softly. (Y/N) wasn't showing any signs of it, but that day had been extremely tiring. Her entire body hurt but she couldn't give up just yet.

"I... heard." She whispered. "A bit." Her eyes tried to close but she opened them wide, fighting her own nature. Jason noticed that.

"Hey, no need to over do it.” He brushed her cheek with his thumb.

"Sleep... here." She begged, placing her hand beside her. He froze for a moment, embarrassed. And then, with a rubor across his face, he sat on the bed beside her. She laid her head on his chest and quickly fell asleep.

“Go to sleep, love. We have all the time in the world.”

[gwoongi]

wordless pt.2

jeon jeongguk / reader genre: hitman (john wick au), sugar daddy au, angst rating: mature words: 4.4k warnings: violence mention, toxic relationships, mentioned deaths a/n: oh fyi jeongguk isnt part of the mafias included in these drabbles, he’s a solo hitman who works closely with taehyung nd other mentioned men. he has his own little business/group of hitmen (like the continental kinda style thing) where he’s sort of the big man who people look up to, but he’s not rly mafia :) hope that helps explain stuff hehehe. Also this one is sad heheheh x2

Sometimes, saying “I love you” is inappropriate, and given your circumstances, you think it might send Jeongguk over the edge if he hears them again.

Parts: One, Two, Three, Four, Five

(11) Telling them a dumb joke just to see them smile.

“I’m really sorry, baby. I really am.”

Next to you on the couch, Jeongguk reaches for your hands that are clamped in your lap. The clock ticks hauntingly slowly, and everything feels dark, and cold, and empty. The front room that is usually vibrant with life and energy is now devoid of emotion, besides the sniffles on the couch that are hidden in shadows.

“It’s okay,” you reply quietly, sniffing once again. “Not your fault.”

“I know,” Jeongguk says, “but I’m still sorry.”

There was nothing that could have been done. Not really, even though Jeongguk repents at the thought that he could have done something. It was an accident, a car that pushed into another one and sent your parents off the bridge and into the Han River. It seemed impossible, but as of late, the impossible became possible. Jeongguk had heard the news several hours after you, contemplating in the silence of your responses over the phone. Eventually, he asked Taehyung and got more than what he bargained for.

“Is there anybody left?” he asks.

“Like my family?”

“Yeah,” he softly answers.

You sniff once more, wiping at your eyes with your sleeve. “My aunt, she, uh, she lives in Finland, I think. I don’t know, everybody cut ties after you. Well. After, you know.”

Jeongguk gulps sourly, “yeah. After your brother.”

Somewhere in the city, police sirens blare. From in the kitchen, the small radio still reads out a report of the accident, and if Jeongguk were to rise and look out of the window, he might see the flashing lights from the bridge. When the room goes silent, Jeongguk’s just afraid you’ll hear the report and start crying again.

“Can you, um,” you start, swallowing the lump in your throat, “I don’t know, tell me about your day or something.”

“Yeah, sure,” Jeongguk mutters, rubbing his thumb across your hand. “Wore that badge to work today. You know the Dad one?” You nod and he continues, “Got a stir out of my guys. You were right, Taehyung got salty about it.”

You manage a laugh, little puffs of air from your nose. “I should have got him one. Maybe a brother one, I didn’t see uncles.”

“Fuck him,” Jeongguk says, “My gift, my badge.”

“Don’t wanna upset him,” you shrug pathetically, along with a tight sniff that burns your left nostril.

Jeongguk rubs your arm, “He’s not gonna be upset. Seeing you upset makes me upset, though,” he says quietly, and you peer around your hair at him, “what kind of Dad would I be if I let my little girl be upset, hmmm?”

He raises his eyebrows like he’s feigning an innocence and the sight makes you laugh slightly, not enough to distract you but enough to leave Jeongguk satisfied. He smiles and leans over, dropping his head against yours with a little sigh that blows your hair. It wasn’t enough to distract you from the devastation that is losing your family, but if it’s something to make you feel less alone, then he’ll try.

(12) Following their family traditions that they enjoy.

“I can’t imagine your brother doing this,” Jeongguk says, holding a ribbon of tinsel in his hands with an unconvincing stare thrown in your direction. He does this whilst standing near the doorway, just behind your couch, like he’s ready at any moment to leave or come inside.

As he does this, you’re across the living room, waltzing with a tree that stands on an angle, lopsided and skinny and naked with no decorations. The lights sit in a snake-like swirl on the floor, flickering on one setting and in resignation, you sigh loudly and turn to face him.

“Well, the last time he helped me decorate a tree, I was five,” you reason. “It’s been a long time, but my parents always did this with me, and-”

“Yeah, I know,” Jeongguk frowns. Since the bridge, he’s always walked on eggshells around the subject of parents and traditions. Before he knew it, Christmas was two weeks away, and around his tight schedule and endless demand for his presence at work, he figured he had to make up for the lost time by being with you.

Jeongguk never imagined that he’d rely on you to absolve him of his own boredom and self pity, but here he is, on a Wednesday afternoon in your apartment that he unwillingly thinks of as a retreat, a home away from home when things get too claustrophobic back at his own place. Things are messy and complicated and cold there. He likes being here, because of how it feels being here.

But maybe he’s here out of guilt, and you stare at him for a few seconds, recognising this unfamiliar distance in his eyes that screams guilt and discomfort. You don’t want to mention it, scared of what might be underneath the mask he’s wearing tonight.

“If you’re not gonna do anything, can you at least hold the tree so I can put the lights on it?” you ask. “You can just go, if you want.”

“I don’t,” he insists, moving around the couch. “I just. I never did this as a kid.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he admits, grabbing the tree as you crouch for the lights, “so this feels a little childish.”

You shrug, “nothing childish about Christmas.”

“Everything about Christmas is childish when you have never really celebrated it,” Jeongguk theorises. Now that he’s holding the tree, it’s a lot easier to decorate.

“We can celebrate it if you’d like,” you suggest. He says nothing, “not like all the gifts and stuff, but just in general.”

Jeongguk smiles to himself and moves so you can weave the lights around the branches. “Alright, sounds like it’ll kill my time this Christmas?”

You scoff, laughing lightly. “Well, isn’t that what I’m here for? To kill your time?”

Jeongguk takes a step back once the lights are wrapped around, and throws an arm over your shoulder, bringing you closer to his body. “Something like that.”

(13) Playing your fingers through their hair while sitting next to them on the couch.

Jeongguk had asked you to meet him at his place when he got off from work, and thankfully the guard on the gate had let you up early with the promise of cookies the next time you came to visit. You let yourself up to his suite and waited on the couch, a cup of tea steaming on the coffee table and nothing to do but stare at the ceiling, lit up blue with the city outside.

About half an hour later, Jeongguk comes through the front door and drops his shit by the shoe rack. His keys rattle and drop on the counter and a few moments later, he’s moving across the room to the couch where he drops, knees first, setting his head in your lap as he falls.

“Hey,” you say unenthusiastically, stifling a yawn as he groans and stuffs his face closer into your body. He doesn’t say anything, just lies there, and you gently lock your fingers into his hair that seems messy and almost curly and begin to play.

“Tired?” you ask, and this time he moans in reply, a yes, and nothing else is said.

(14) Singing and dancing to their favourite song.

“Remind me again- it’s definitely okay that I’m here as your guest?”

Jeongguk’s hand on your lower back never disappears as he tours you around the room, gently smiling at people around him with a slender glass of wine in the other free hand. It is on this Saturday evening that Jeongguk finds himself in attendance of the Somber-Rain Ball. Unlike any other time where Jeongguk came solo, or with his colleagues from work, tonight he is joined by you, tailored in a beautiful black dress that sweeps the floor behind you, still somehow modest enough to keep you out of the glazed eyes of the other attendees.

“Yes, it is absolutely fine,” he sighs, steering you out of the self-collected gallery that surely belongs in this large and maze-like mansion. “I wouldn’t have brought you with me if it wasn’t allowed, Y/N.”

“I know, but lately you’ve been doing all sorts of things that you probably shouldn’t,” you remind him, curling into his armpit as you cross the dancefloor towards the bar, that slopes to a side and is scarcely populated. A man who stands there bows his head to Jeongguk but ignores him straight afterwards.

Jeongguk laughs, “Isn’t that my thing?”

“I don’t want to get myself into trouble,” you shrug. Jeongguk smiles and kisses the crown of your head.

“Getting into trouble is my job, dear, not yours.” He faces the bartender and slides the drink, “A round of bourbon after the dance, please.”

“What kind, sir?”

Jeongguk hums, then clicks his tongue, “Try the Brothers’ Bond, I heard you just had it imported.”

The bartender nods, “Certainly, sir.”

Jeongguk nods and turns his attention back towards you, right as the young bartender hurries to find clean glasses for the happy couple. Jeongguk turns to your eyes and smiles at the raised eyebrows he sees, and pulls you further towards him as the orchestra finishes their latest piece.

“Isn’t that the bourbon that the Salvatore brothers made?” Jeongguk asks, feigning an innocence and a forgetfulness for the time you brought it up to his face a few weeks ago. You say nothing besides shaking your head, turning towards the crowd as it slightly thins, just as the orchestra calls it for a few seconds, and a song on the speakers takes its place.

It’s just the first few opening chords but Jeongguk clearly is familiar. He sighs loudly, audibly with an “ah” and then tucks himself closer to you.

“Love this song,” he states. “Miss L/N, care to dance with me?”

You look towards the floor, and then back at him: “Yeah, sure. Is this Doris Day?”

Jeongguk seems pleased as he leads you. He takes a center position, caring little about the potential attention he may attract by taking your waist. It doesn’t stop him from doing so, a smile in your hair as he begins the dance.

“Glad you know it,” Jeongguk replies. “I spent a lot of time with my Aunt when I was younger. She loved this song.”

You hum quietly, “She has good taste. I think this song is in that one Tonya Harding movie.”

“Probably,” he scoffs, kissing your hair again and curling an arm tighter around your middle. He is certainly attracting unwanted eyes. In a metaphorical perspective, this is your first dance. Might be your only dance, but Jeongguk’s not trying to wish away the moment, not just yet.

(15) Calming them down when they have a bad dream.

Bad dream. Not you. Tonight, Jeongguk is a victim. 

He shoots himself awake before you have a time to sit up on your elbows, and he pants loudly, searching around the mattress for a weapon but instead, he finds your hands. Jeongguk jumps.

“It’s just me,” you tell him breathlessly, staring at his wide and wild eyes. He gasps, like he forgot you were even there, but calms when he scurries to take your hand in his own.

Jeongguk hates to feel like he needs help, but tonight, he seeks you first. He slides his hands around yours and finds his grip, remembering where and who and presses a kiss to your hand as you lift it to his face.

“Sorry,” he apologises, “bad dream. I’m gonna-”

“It’s okay,” you assure him quietly, now sitting upright. “You never have to say sorry, okay? It’s okay.”

“Mhm,” he agrees half-heartedly. “I’m gonna….get a drink, or something.”

He rises from the bed and quite literally stumbles to the door, coughing the dryness from his throat as he makes his way to the kitchen. From the bed you sit and watch him leave, knowing from routine that when he comes back, he’ll lie awake, stoney, and won’t rest until the morning. He won’t sleep for the remainder of the night, and he’ll sleep in the office.

Jeongguk never talks of his nightmares. He never tells you about the recurring dreams of his past, his past lovers or friends or family. You know that the dreams must be so bad that he pretends to sleep to keep you from worrying. 

He never tells you that he gets them most when you sleep over, because the more aware he is of you beside him, the more he dreams of losing you.

(16) Having a tickle fight until you’re breathless.

There was no contract for your arrangement with Jeongguk. You were part of a very complicated sugar daddy/sugar baby relationship, and there were never really any rules to it. You could fall in love with him all you wanted, but all Jeongguk had made clear from the first date was that he didn’t fall easily, and wasn’t seeing you to fall in love. If you fell for him, he didn’t really care. He’d never fall back. (Right?)

Despite there being no rules, you still always felt like taking photos with Jeongguk often felt like a breach of contract, like breaking the rules. Jeongguk had already shown you off to the world of Mafia and crime at the Somber-Rain Ball, but yet you were afraid to take a photo for your own gallery.

There was one, however, that Jeongguk had taken himself and sent to you when he was on a trip in Athens. It was a slightly dark and blurry photograph, from early when you two had met and Jeongguk felt like he had to get you to stay sometimes by playing the role of a lover. In the photo, his fingers are ghosting at your sides, his face is scrunched and in a smile and you’re rolling around on the covers. It’s a live photo, so it moves for a few seconds.

Jeongguk had made you laugh almost to the point of tears, and you can probably still remember the feeling of knots in your stomach, your voice threatening to pee on his bed if he didn’t pack it in. He stopped, reluctantly. He didn’t want to see you pee. He didn’t want you to cry, either.

Back then, he had been generous to avoid tears. (What changed?)

(17) Folding their clean laundry and putting it away.

It’s been a long day. That was obvious by the way Jeongguk called you at two, and didn’t even want to do anything once you got here. Just got home. Are you free, maybe? Like an idiot, you came.

His place was a sight for sore eyes; by the front door, he hadn’t even taken off his shoes, and a pile of cluster and mess led a trail to his bedroom. You stood awkwardly in the doorway, staring at the way he lay with his face down on the covers, feet hanging off the bed stiffly, the curtains drawn, city blaring, TV on a quite volume relaying the emergency call made to the police this morning about the death of Cho Minsu, one of Seoul’s most controversial politicians.

For a few minutes, you remain in the doorway and he remains unmoved.

“...and, although the call made to the police department this morning was made anonymously, the leader of the police department, Choi Seungkwan, seems to believe that the call was made by at least one of the rumoured underground organisations within this city. Just last week, the Twin Tiger Mafia were making headlines after a fire was caused in the center of Seoul, but there have been no confirmations from the police at this time, nor has a statement been issued by the President. One witness said it was the work of one man, which leads the authorities to believe that this is the involvement of a third party.”

Jeongguk appears glum by the news but doesn’t switch it off. As he wallows in his own self despair, you turn back towards the main section of his home and take in the mess. There’s a smashed frame on the floor, and the kitchen is disgustingly overcrowded with dishes, and ashtrays that are like mountains. The living room is cold and empty and clothes hang over the back of his couch. Here, you find not only his clothes from the night before but also the suit from the ball, as well as underwear you know isn’t yours.

Quietly, and without a fuss, you reach for the unknown underwear and with your hand tucked underneath one of his clothes, you scoop them up and toss them into the washer in the kitchen. The ashtray is cleaned, the dishes are put in the dishwasher, and the curtains are drawn. Jeongguk must be asleep by the time you come into his bedroom, carrying the clothes you folded for him to set away in his cupboards.

This will be the second time you have cried in his bedroom while he was sleeping, and as he sleeps, peaceful and perhaps even remorseful, you return back to the front door and slip into your shoes.

(18) Sharing a soft smile across a crowded room.

You dream of him.

It’s the night of the ball. As you’re in the arms of Taehyung, stuck in a dance that will make you look less like a trophy wife for Jeongguk, the man himself is stuck in a conversation near the bar. Probably halfway through the waltz, you manage to lock his gaze. It’s like a movie, where the characters meet in slow motion, and everything seems to be slower and more passionate. All he does is smile, so gently and softly that it doesn’t even look like him.

It’s gone and he’s back to a straight face in conversation before you know it, but it’s enough for you to dream about it. Maybe this time, you’ll add a little bit to it, and create a new story to replace the original. One where the circumstances might be different, or the song, or the man you’re with.

(19) Bringing them a plate of their favourite sliced fruit.

“...what the fuck is a ‘BARB’, again? Surely not the Barbs, right? Right?”

Slowly but surely, you may be going insane behind this computer screen. You woke up in a cold sweat to the assumption your paper was due today, only by happy surprise to figure out it’s due next week, on a totally different day. It was eight, the sun was shining, and all Jeongguk can hear as he wakes up is keys tapping away relentlessly.

He stretches his arms and moves from the bed, swinging his feet to the floor and as if he owns the place (although if he’s being technical, he does) he heads to the shower and gets himself cleaned for the day he has planned ahead. Jeongguk showers, brushes his teeth and jumps into the clothes he came here in. By the time he’s out, he has time to poke his head into your makeshift study, which used to be a laundry room before the bastard thing broke and you had it moved to the bathroom instead. You’re still working, one leg up folded and a string of swear words leaving your mouth as you stare at the blinking word document.

Jeongguk frowns, nonetheless unsurprised by your antics. Ever since you went back to school, he’s been seeing less of you. Truthfully, it’s fine; Jeongguk is more than used to being alone and he doesn’t like to spend too much time with you. Not because he doesn’t like to, but quite actually for the opposite reason. Jeongguk likes you too much that he’s afraid he’ll give more than he wants to get back. Why fall in love when he can’t afford to?

Jeongguk moves to the kitchen, opening the fridge and getting a bottle of water. Sucking his teeth, he closes the fridge and grabs two apples from the bowl near the kettle. He twists the little device he found from your drawer and removes the stalk for both, cutting shapes out of the fruit into a bowl. He tosses the utensils into the washing up bowl for you to tackle later when you inevitably procrastinate, and before he leaves to go to work, Jeongguk heads back towards where you sit and brings the bowl just in between your hands, in front of the keyboard.

You look up with alarm as he does this, frightened because he came in so silently. He smiles quickly, innocent, and leans forward to kiss you. He tastes like toothpaste.

“Morning, gotta go, though,” he says in a hurry.

Before he moves back, you lean up and steal a second kiss, “so early?”

“Mm, I have to go to work,” Jeongguk replies.

You glance at the fruit. “Did you cut this?”

“Yep. I know it’s so hard to chop fruit, but I did it all by myself,” he jokes. He kisses you a third time, “Really gotta go. Don’t call me ‘til you finish this fucking paper.”

“Like that’s ever gonna happen,” you grumble, turning to the screen with a frown. Jeongguk smiles to himself and ruffles your hair, just before he steps out of the office and leaves you in the silence, collecting his things and leaving before Taehyung threatens to put a bounty on his head for being late to work again.

(20) Washing their back/hair in the shower.

“Fuck, shower sex sucks ass.”

You turn around, almost offended. “What?”

Jeongguk laughs loudly in the comforts of his own bathroom, leaning for a shampoo off the shelf. “I’m not saying you’re bad, I’m just saying it sucks. It’s so...slippery and hard.”

“I thought you liked it,” you reply.

He shrugs.

“Then why the fuck do you insist on it,” you sigh, spinning and leaning for the bottle. He moves it away, “Don’t be stingy.”

“I’m gonna wash your hair for you,” Jeongguk explains, squirting a generous amount into his hands. “Turn back around, love when your ass is against my dick like that.”

You roll your eyes and do as he says. He’s a kidder after he fucks you. Probably a pride thing because he knows he’s done a good job. Jeongguk massages the shampoo into your hair and inhales the scent, because it’s a new seasalt fragrance he saw on Youtube when he was looking at interviews for this one super secret guy he’s after, and apparently Adblock for Safari is shitty and never blocks ads on videos.

“Smells good,” you compliment. “Buy this for your other bitches, or just for me?”

Jeongguk smirks. “Nah, they got the banana one.”

“I thought you hated that fragrance.”

“That’s why they have it and not you,” he says simply. You don’t know whether or not the reply satisfies you. For one, it tells you that you’re his favourite, but it also tells you that he is indeed fucking other girls, which is something you were never totally thrilled to accept or believe. It conflicts you, to the point where you’re silent as he washes your hair.

“What?” Jeongguk asks finally, pulling at your head and half forcing your face to him. “You mad?”

“No,” you reply. “You done with my hair?”

He lets go, “Yeah. Just rinse it out.”

You do that, staring at the little drops of water on the shower door. Jeongguk sighs and switches positions with you, staring at your shoulders as you wash the shampoo out.

“Are you really mad?” he asks.

You sigh, “I’m not mad, Jeongguk.” You peer at him, “promise.”

“Bullshit,” he exclaims, like he’s tired. “I thought you knew I saw other people.”

“I did,” you lie. “It’s fine, really. I’m not, like, judging you for it.”

“Why’s it feel like you kind of are?” Jeongguk asks in response.

You shrug, “You tell me.”

The bathroom’s cold as the shower switches off and Jeongguk leaves first, stepping into the living room with the towel around his waist as you get dressed into a gown in the bathroom.

He looks over his shoulder at you as you exit, turning off the light and looking for your clothes around the room. He tugs, sick and frowning, and so he slowly moves for you across the bedroom. As you’re looking down at your clothes curled up on the chair by his drawers, Jeongguk snakes his arms around your waist from behind and slowly brings you up against him.

You close your eyes, as if to prevent yourself from saying something, and he kisses behind your ear. “I didn’t mean to make you unhappy, baby.”

“You didn’t,” you tell him.

“You know you’re a bad liar,” he mutters. “That’s why you’ll be a good journalist, you’re too good at telling the truth.” You resign, knowing he’s said this speech before. “You can be honest with me.”

You turn in his arms. “Look. I’m not mad. Mad’s not the word. Disappointed, maybe, but life is full of disappointments, you know? I mean. I don’t know...I moved across the city just to live next to you because you asked me to, I thought it could be easier for us to both get what we want out of each other and so it just...kind of sucks that you need other people? It’s like, am I not filling the gaps enough? I thought sugar daddies only had one baby at a time, I thought they were lonely old men.”

“Do I look old to you?” Jeongguk asks, missing the point. Only he knows the point. “And, look. You bring out the best in me. Just look at me.”

“I am looking at you, Guk,” you lament, “but I just see you, and this guy who wants more than he has. It’s sucky, for me, I guess.”

He thinks on that for a second. “You’re not just a baby for me, you know that, I know that, everybody knows that. I don’t even pay you when we see each other anymore, you can’t tell me that’s the same thing we expected to have a few months ago, right?”

“Right, but-”

“But, what?” he questions. “I’m here right now because I chose to be, and because being with you just feels...natural, I guess. I don’t like just calling you to fuck for five minutes because I got stressed out at work. You’re more than that to me.”

It struggles to settle in your stomach, and he stares down at you almost pleadingly. “You know that. You do, come on.”

“Baby...Look. If I was natural, and if I was more to you than a baby, then you wouldn’t need to be calling other people when you’re stressed. If you really needed me, you’d need me. It’s that simple.”

Jeongguk shakes his head, letting go, “It’s not that simple.”

“No, Guk, it is that simple,” you murmur. You smile at him, because you don’t want him to feel too bad about it. He simply stares at you, saying nothing as you look back at your clothes. “I have class tomorrow, so I’m gonna head home.”

He says nothing.

“Good night, Guk,” you call from the front door a few minutes later. He doesn’t reply, and the silence does it for him.

[ineloqueent]

Starstruck: Part 16

Brian May x Fem!Reader

This is Part 16 of a multi-part fic. Click the links below to read the Masterpost, the previous part, or the next part of the fic :)

Masterpost / Part 15 / Part 17

Summary: When studying at Imperial College in the 1970s, your path is crossed by a beautiful boy as much in love with the stars as you.  

Warnings: swearing, drinking, sentiments of worthlessness

Historical Inaccuracies:

no idea what happened on the first night of tour; yay fictionalisation!

Word Count: 4.1k

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

You’d never seen anything like it.

People had gone as far as to camp out in front the venue the night before, sharing blankets and passing around coffee and various types of alcohol to keep warm, cheering as the tour bus had pulled into the carpark, running to shake hands with the roadies as they began to unload equipment.

Then there’d been the next wave of show-goers, the second-most dedicated bunch. They’d arrived hours and hours before the gig, had clamoured for a spot in line closest to the front of the door.

And, from backstage, you could hear people laughing and shouting happily as they entered the theatre, overjoyed even just to be there, in a place where Queen would perform.

The enthusiasm was contagious, and it washed over you in waves, every cry as friends reunited to see their favourite band play live, every hiss of excitement when the stage curtains rustled or a roadie happened to pass through the main room of the theatre. Everywhere you looked, people were dressed in t-shirts with Queen’s logo on it, t-shirts that looked like they’d been worn and loved since the beginning of time, and waved banners made with old sheets and acrylic paint. The dedication alone was flooring.

Freddie seemed to think so too.

“Can you hear them, out there?” he was saying.

The crowd was chanting, and the poor supporting band had never stood a chance; the people were shouting for what they wanted, and the shouts rang out loud and clear— we want Queen! We want Queen! We want Queen!

“Yeah,” Roger nodded, a grin spreading across his face. He was already tapping his drumsticks, on the edge of a table, and alongside the rhythm, your heartbeat increased, the anticipation in the room building with each moment you lingered there.

“I wish Veronica were here,” Deacy sighed, and you turned to him in sympathy. Through everything, she was always the person on his mind, the person he wanted to share a moment with. You couldn’t imagine a purer form of love.

Roger said, “For god’s sake, John, it’s been barely a day,” but he too sounded sorry.

Brian wasn’t participating in the conversation, even as Freddie gushed on about the pre-show thrill, and as Roger resolved to take a Polaroid of Deacy each night before a concert, so that the latter could show Veronica and Robert how he’d continued to think of them while he was gone.

You approached Brian, who was doing his make-up in the mirror Freddie had recently vacated, drawing on black eyeliner with a heavy hand. He glanced over his shoulder as your neared, and his lips curved upward, but his expression was tight.

“You okay?” you asked, touching his shoulder lightly.

He straightened up from where he’d leaned to reach the mirror, and as you dropped your hand, you noticed the tremble in his.

“Hey,” you frowned, taking the eyeliner from him and replacing it on the counter. “Are you— are you nervous?”

Brian bit his lip and glanced away in something like shame.

He looked so vulnerable in that moment, eyes downcast and shoulders hunched, curls floating down to hide his eyes.

“Ridiculous, isn’t it?” he murmured, punctuating the remark with laughter that was probably meant to be light but did not come off that way at all.

You took his hand. “No, it’s not.”

Without looking at you, he exhaled slowly. Then, to your vehement surprise, he pulled on your hand and brought you close to him, gathering you up in his arms and clutching you to his chest.

You let out a soft oh, wrapping your arms around his slim torso as he drew a quivering breath. You could hear his heartbeat, fast and heavy, and you tightened your hold around him.

“It’s okay,” you smoothed your hands over his back, trying to steady his breathing. “You’ll be brilliant.”

You felt him nod.

“But why are you nervous now? You’ve done this hundreds of times.”

Brian sighed. “I’m always nervous,” he said.

“And what do you normally do about it?”

“Nothing. Shove it down. Try not to think about it.”

“Excellent coping mechanism,” you muttered. “Well, I’ll be here to give you your daily hug.”

Brian laughed, mirth returning to the sound.

“Thank you,” he said. He gave you another squeeze before letting go.

“Anytime,” you responded, dropping your arms to your sides.

But he shook his head. “Really, love. Thank you.”

You smiled, and his eyes glowed with warmth.

“Brian?” said Roger, and Brian spun toward his bandmates.

“It’s time,” Freddie breathed, and beyond the dressing room, beyond the hallways and the empty rooms and the walls plastered with signatures of performers past, the audience breathed with him.

They were him. He was them. Freddie Mercury breathed life, and life honoured him in its existence.

A flurry of smiles were exchanged, and soon you were following four of the most brilliant people you’d ever met toward the stage where thousands of other lucky souls would delight in their talent.

A group formed quickly, Freddie with Roger at one shoulder and Mary at the other, Heather close behind, followed by Crystal and Deacy and Roadie John, and Peter Hince and you with Brian, Ian bringing up the rear.

Your thoughts raced, but everything around you moved as though soaked in treacle, as though delayed, your mind compensating for the adrenaline in your veins by slowing everything down.

Then Freddie was being handed his sheared-off microphone stand, and Roger was tousling his hair in a last-minute fix, and Deacy was slinging on his bass while Brian lifted his guitar.

It was all so surreal, the chatter and laughter amongst the group, the occasional eyebrow raise or wink exchanged in anticipation of what was about to begin, the hush that fell over the crowd before Queen were announced and finally, finally, took the stage, cheers from the audience rattling the walls of the theatre, the ground, as though it all was no more than rice paper.

“Go House Lights.”

You clasped your hands to your chest, unable to keep the smile from your face as the lights went up and Queen were illuminated in all their shiny satin splendour, as the first chord rang from Brian’s guitar, and Roger’s drumsticks met with the drums in an earthquake of noise, and Deacy strummed his bass until the floors hummed with the sound, and Freddie launched into song.

Heather leaned against your shoulder, and when you looked over at her, she extended her hand to you. Mary held Heather’s other hand, smiling at the view of the stage with tears in her eyes. She nodded to you in silent solidarity, and you took Heather’s outstretched hand.

Such a feeling of belonging washed over you, and the intensity of the sensation brought tears to your eyes as well.

You didn’t want to run. You wanted to be where you were.

You’d never felt that before.

Not before now.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

The first gig had been electric.

Queen had opened and closed to a rager of an audience, and had held them enraptured, wound around their pinkies throughout, a spell cast over everyone within the room. You’d felt it too— when they harmonised, when Roger’s drumming ran with John’s bass and the sound of it replaced your thoughts, when Freddie rushed past you for a costume change, when Brian leaned into one of his guitar solos.

The ‘Son & Daughter’ solo had sent shivers down your spine.

You’d felt like you were back in the pub on that first night, watching Brian’s eyes catch on yours. Indeed, he seemed to remember it too. He’d looked to you in the wings, smiled upon singing the very same line he’d sung to you all those months ago. Shivers.

Now, a few hours later, Freddie was keeping the energy going with his first-night-of-tour party.

And you were wearing Zandra’s top, the one she’d made for you.

You’d all but forgotten about the top over the summer, despite having brought it with you after Zandra had dropped it off at your house.

But you’d seen the garment as soon as you’d unpacked back on Camden High Street, and in its glittering grandeur, it was begging to be worn. So you’d packed it again, this time to take with you on tour.

And when on this night you’d finally donned the sparkly top, you’d felt invincible.

The party was an extravagant event. Queen hadn’t even released the album yet and they were already spending fantastical amounts of money. But given that Deacy would be attending Freddie’s party of his own free will, you supposed that the event must have been cleared by budgeting. Still, you didn’t want to know how much Freddie had spent on decorations, his own outfit, the food.

The party was at the hotel where you all were staying, but for tonight’s occasion, Freddie had also booked the dance hall which lay on the seventh floor, and several surrounding suites— “In case people get frisky, darling.”

You were met at the door of the dance hall by none other than Freddie himself, who was personally greeting and directing people as he oversaw the admittance of the guestlist.

When he saw you he opened his arms widely, and you hugged him.

“Hello Freddie,” you said.

He kissed the top of your head enthusiastically. “Y/N, I’m so happy you’re here!” It was apparent he’d already had a couple of drinks. Tipsy, not yet drunk. Still coherent, at least. “And that top is stunning!” he picked at the sleeve of your sparkly black blouse. “One of Zandra’s?”

“Yeah, she actually made it for me,” you responded with an amused smile, remembering Zandra’s spontaneous visit to your place back in June.

Freddie raised his eyebrows. “My goodness, she must have liked you a lot. Go on inside,” he patted your shoulder.“I’ll join you all in a few minutes.”

“Okay. See you in a bit.” You smiled, but the expression was uneasy, because you’d just remembered how it was you felt about parties. All that mingling with people you barely knew, and hovering awkwardly by the bar because you were avoiding people you’d spoken to earlier and didn’t want to speak to again.

“Oh and, darling!” Freddie called, just as you were going.

“Yeah?”

His lips curled into a smile, and his eyes looked villainous in their winged eyeliner.

“Brian’s looking for you,” he winked.

A shiver ran through you.

“Oh— okay,” you murmured, feeling your cheeks begin to burn.

The flush spread through your body as you entered the dimly lit room, as anticipation and nervousness shook your hands where they hung by your sides.

Would you be able to spot anyone you knew? Quickly? You didn’t much want to repeat the experiences of your teenage years.

Would Brian be there, waiting? And if he was, what would he think of what you were wearing? Your blouse was loose and low-cut, your trousers were silky and tight. The thought of his eyes running over you tickled goosebumps into your skin.

The music in the hall was already loud, and you wondered how many complaints Freddie would receive from the other hotel guests before the night was through.

Walking deeper into the hall, you remembered why the music was so loud.

The hall had a record player in a corner and boasted impressively sized speakers, courtesy of Deacy, who had, in a conversation with Freddie that you’d only heard bits and pieces of, insisted music was so much a part of creating an atmosphere. He’d also insisted on overseeing the rig himself, with Queen’s own sound crew running the whole thing.

The low lighting was purple, blue, and black in tone, and a disco ball strung from the ceiling reflected the colours around the room. Streamers and balloons and at least a hundred people dancing and mingling completed the look of the hall and energised the place, similar to the feeling evoked by the Speak at Oxford Circus upon initial entry.

Coincidentally, the first party-goer you recognised was Deacy, and when he saw you, he grinned and made his way over to you, a colourful cocktail in hand.

Relief left you in a sigh.

“Hello Y/N!”

“Hi, Deacy!” You wrapped John in a hug, though you’d seen him just hours ago. His presence was comforting in the sea of strangers that surrounded you.

“So,” Deacy gestured to your sparkly blouse, “dressed to impress, are we?”

“Not at all,” you shouted over the disco blaring from the speaker rig.

“Not even a certain Brian May?”

Just then, someone called your name, and you whirled, heart thudding. But where you had expected to find Brian, you instead spotted Roger, waving at you cheerily.

You waved back, then said to Deacy with a slight laugh, “No. Don’t think he’d want me to.”

John raised his eyebrows. “What makes you say that?”

“Deacy,” you implored, “he called me his best friend.”

“Y/N! How many times—” Deacy gave a heavy sigh. “That’s what I said to my girlfriend before I married her.”

You pursed your lips. “I think you two are the exception, not the rule.”

John rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay, whatever, but he already can’t take his eyes off of you, so if you made a move, I daresay he wouldn’t mind.”

“What—” you started, but Deacy had disappeared into the crowd.

“Y/N,” said a familiar voice, and you turned toward the sound.

Brian.

Wide-eyed, soft-lipped. Even the dim lighting could not shroud his beauty in shadow.

“You look…” he shook his head slowly. “Like the night sky.”

And here he was complimenting you.

“Is that a good thing?” you asked, knowing full well what his answer would be, but wanting to hear him say it.

His gaze ran all over you, beginning where your toes peeked out of your high heels, skimming up your legs and over your torso and finally fixing upon your eyes. The look felt suddenly more intimate to you than any touch had ever been.

“You look beautiful,” he murmured. He held his hand out to you. “Dance with me?”

You had no qualms about taking his hand.

Until of course Led Zeppelin’s ‘Whole Lotta Love’ ended and someone replaced the record, setting the needle to the third track.

You knew that it was the third track, because Heather had once made you memorise the tracklist of this record.

Heather. How you missed Heather. You barely saw her anymore.

Heather had once been your closest friend, and she’d very much shaped the person you were today.

When you’d first become friends, she had taken you shopping and taught you how to dress to accentuate what you wanted to accentuate, how to dress to make you feel like fashion was your friend, and not your enemy, as it had often been, in terms of poor self-image. And in terms of music, she had introduced you to so many artists, most notably Mott the Hoople.

A Mott the Hoople record was now on the deck, and that was why, when across the room the needle was placed down on the new record, you were washed away in a wave of nostalgia.

But you weren’t the only one.

Brian’s lips were gently agape, and eyes were soft with emotion, so much sadness in his eyes that you wondered if he’d ever really been happy, all those times he’d smiled.

He still held out his hand, but now he did so almost shyly. The askance was still there, though, and he was asking you to dance with him.

Slowly, you took his hand, and he drew you close, one palm against the small of your back, his other hand remaining in yours.

He exhaled in a tense manner as you laid your head against his chest.

Then he began to talk.

“Last year, we were abroad, opening for Mott the Hoople every night on their tour.”

You’d never thought about the fact that the band you were friends with had worked with the band you’d so revered in your teenage years. It was a riveting, if slightly bizarre, thought. But you kept this musing to yourself; Brian rarely talked unprompted in this way, and you wanted to hear what he had to say.

“They played this song every night,” he said as he swayed with you, “and it was a right rager. Everyone loved it, sang it like it had been written for them, like it belonged to them. And in a way, it did. It wasn’t written for them, but it became theirs, the disaffected youth, the lost, the ones who couldn’t be themselves for the existence of others, the hopeless dreamers.”

You looked up at him, to see how his words had changed the expression on his face.

His gaze was unfixed, staring past you with sleepy eyes in a face of grim sentimentality.

“I stood backstage, in my dark makeup and sweeping sleeves, with Freddie smoking beside me, Roger jumping up and down and twirling his drumsticks, Deacy tuning his unplugged bass up and down. And I thought to myself,” he gave a short laugh, “what the hell am I doing here? All these people... they’re behaving like they belong on stage, like we belong on stage, like I’m not some awkward astrophysics student still unsure of his life choices, walking around in garb that makes David Bowie’s fashion look about as flamboyant as plaid pyjamas.”

You smiled a little at this last remark, given its intention of humour, but everything Brian was saying carried with it such a weight that sadness remained your prevailing emotion.

“Even though I loved performing, there were times when I felt I was not me, not in my body, only watching all these things happen, from very far away.” He exhaled slowly, and the sound was so pitiful that you wanted to draw him even closer. “I was tall and shy and awkward, and you know, nothing’s changed.”

“It was only a year ago,” you said gently. But Brian shook his head.

“So much can change in the course of a year,” he murmured, and you thought his palm pressed more warmly against your back. He met your eyes. “But I haven’t changed. I haven’t changed at all.”

“I would never want you to change.”

He echoed that sad smile you’d smiled earlier. He looked down, and a curl fell over his face. Your heart ached at the sight of him. You contemplated reaching up and winding the curl around your forefinger, to bring him nearer to you, to let him know that you meant what you had said.

Then his smile disappeared entirely.

“What if my dad’s right, Y/N?” his voice was plaintive. “What if I’ve made the wrong decision, pulling out of uni? What if Queen go nowhere? What if we fade away, or fall apart? What if I’m only losing time?”

You opened your mouth to speak, but he wasn’t finished.

“What if I’m not good enough?”

You stopped dancing, letting go of him only to reach up and touch his cheek.

“Brian, look at me.”

He looked at you.

“Define wrong,” you said. “Would you call three, four albums, with chart-topping numbers nowhere? Would you call travelling the world to play music for hundreds of thousands of people who adore you nowhere? Do you think hundreds of thousands of people will just let you fade away? Would you let the four of you fall apart? And would you ever give up the time you’ve spent with Fred and Rog and Deacy, with Zandra bloody Rhodes, through all this wonderful madness?”

You cupped his face, staring into his eyes and willing him, willing him, to believe you. “You’re good enough for all that, Brian. And whatever happens, you’ll always be good enough for me.”

He was speechless, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, motionless though his skin was rosy and his pulse was skipped madly beneath your fingers.

“You’re too good for me,” he whispered. “You always will be.”

He was no longer dancing, and nor were you, because your leg was pressed against his, and his eyes were warmer than sunlight, and you were holding his hand and felt his pulse thrum against your own, and his mouth hovered over yours.

You were so close to him that you could see the little freckle on his lower lip.

Your breath left you in a gasp, and then he was kissing you.

Heat spilled through your veins, dizzying you, and the world felt enchanted.

Brian’s hands were pressed to either side your face, and the gentleness with which he kissed almost hurt. All that you had longed for, held at a distance, brushed away for fear of unrequitedness, was here in this moment, and it was yours.

Yours.

How long had you waited to call this yours? To feel deserving of something like this, someone like this. Still, he was wrong; he was the one who was too good for you. Yet you could not make yourself pull away from him.

You were melting beneath his touch, breathless, pressing closer to him though you were already in his arms, and you were starlight. Floating, ethereal. He made you feel ethereal.

His lips slipped from yours and you opened your eyes to find his gaze on you, his chest rising and falling quickly, and you felt your cheeks flush at his attentiveness.

With his dark curls tumbling about his face, Brian was looking a bit pink himself, much like his summer sunburn, except that his skin was now still lightly tanned from the summer, and this pink only touched his cheeks in a subtle way that enhanced his prettiness by a ridiculous amount.

And then he smiled.

Oh.

It nearly knocked the air from your lungs again.

“Brian,” you breathed, laying your hand over the hand that still rested against your face.

He dipped his forehead and whispered the words across your lips. “Yes, love?”

You couldn’t help it. You ran a finger beneath his jaw, and he shivered.

This time, you kissed him.

His parted lips tasted of chocolate, his hair smelled of flowers, and it was all you could do to not collapse on the spot.

A little whimper escaped you, and you pulled back shyly.

You had suddenly remembered your surroundings, and blushed at the thought of anyone seeing how you’d swooned into Brian’s arms.

“People are staring,” you said.

Brian gave another little shake of his head. “No one’s looking at you,” he murmured, brushing a piece of your hair behind your ear. “Well, that’s not strictly true, because I can’t take my eyes off of you.”

You allowed yourself a smirk. “So I’ve been told.”

Brian looked amused. “Am I that obvious?”

“Not to me, at least.”

“Really?” he raised his eyebrows. “I’ll try to be more obvious in the future.”

Your insides tumbled at the mention of a supposed future.

But then someone gave a cry of alarm, and though Brian still held you tightly, your thoughts scattered like the people around you.

A glass had been shattered.

Purposely.

It’d been thrown. Hurled to the ground in a furious rage.

Somewhere, the music ground to a halt.

“How could you?!”

You recognised the shrill voice as Mary’s. It appeared that Brian did too, because his eyes widened.

“Mary, darling, let’s just—”

“No, Freddie, let us not anything. There is no us. You’ve made that very clear.”

Mary came into view as she ran past you in perilously high platforms, wiping away black tears on the sleeves of her white blouse.

“Mary, wait!”

Freddie hurried after her, and everyone stood gaping in his wake. But when he reached the door that Mary had disappeared beyond, his shoulders slumped, as though the fight had gone out of him. He made a turn down the adjacent hallway instead.

“Jesus Christ,” Brian murmured, eyes trailing after the spectacle that had just taken place. Then he let go of you and followed Freddie.

“Has anyone seen a broom?” someone said to the silence of the room.

You swayed where you stood, alone in the middle of it all, still trying to process the multitude of things that had happened in the past two minutes.

“Y/N!” Brian called to you from the door to the hallway Freddie had taken. “Find Mary, would you?”

You nodded absently, pressing your fingers to your lips where Brian’s soft mouth had pressed just moments before. The blood still rushed in your ears, your heart still hammered in your chest.

You opened the door to the stairwell and followed after Mary.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

A/N: i’m smiling smugly right now and you can’t stop me

taglist: @melting-obelisks​ @retropetalss​ @hgmercury39​  @topsecretdeacon @joemazzmatazz​ @perriwiinkle​ @brianmays-hair​ @im-an-adult-ish​ @ilikebigstucks​ @doing-albri​ @killer-queen-87​ @n0-self-c0ntro1​ @archaicmusings​ @cloudyyspace​ @annina-96​ @themarchoftherainbowqueen​ @annajolras​ 

Masterpost / Part 15 / Part 17

[timetoresurface]

Turn / LTY

vampire!au Taeyong x Y/N 6k vampire thingy where weird stuff just seems to happen, but you don’t care as long as you were close to Taeyong // no warnings

Honestly, you don’t know a lot about your town’s history. Still, you did know that vampires and humans lived in harmony together. You remember something about a truce many moons ago where vampires vowed not to bite a human in exchange for a peaceful life. Even though you have never really heard of anyone being randomly bitten for the past fifty years, humans were still wary of the vampires. 

One side of your town was bright and filled with people living their carefree lives, and the other was more dark and forbidden territory to humans. Vampires actually didn’t care if you would go over to their side. However, the elderly people in your town still remember the times when simply walking through their neighbourhood meant being bitten, or worse being turned into one of them.

There was only one case five years ago where a female vampire had turned your neighbour into a vampire, but this was only because they were in love. You always thought it was kind of strange, as she was probably over a hundred years old and your neighbour was only twenty at the time. What could they have possibly talked about? You still remember everyone being upset by the news, and local stores closed for a whole week because everyone thought the vampires went loose again. They didn’t, of course. After a week or so, everything had gone back to normal, and people seemed to have forgotten about your neighbour. As if he had never existed in the first place. 

You loved walking through the vampire part of town, as it was more deserted and gave you some time to think. You also needed to go through the quiet streets to get to your classes. You never really liked taking the bus as it was too crowded, and you definitely didn’t want to take the long route. Your only option was to go through the peaceful streets filled with weird antique shops and high-tech stores. You had entered one of their shops once, and it was as close to normal as could be. You couldn’t tell if the lady behind the register was a vampire, but in the end, it didn’t matter. They were simply living their life in the same peaceful manner as a human would do. You didn’t understand the fuss about them being mean and secretive. Vampires used to be human too, and the vampires in your town wanted to live an ordinary life. 

You didn’t know many vampires. You only knew of the lady in the shop who could or could possibly not be a vampire. But there was one person you suspected of being a real vampire, and his name was Taeyong. He lived a bit outside town, like you, where there was no strict vampire or human territory. He had moved a little over a year ago to go to your local college together with some friends. He was the brooding and mysterious character who had fascinated you since day one.

At first, you didn’t consider him being a vampire, but there were some giveaways if you paid close attention. He was pale, and this might not a big surprise as everyone in your town was remotely pale due to the lack of sun your city saw, but he was exceptionally pale. As if he was sick, but other days he had a healthy glow and noticeably more energy. He was also too smart to go to your small local college, and this you knew because you shared a lot of the same classes. You only talked to him once, and it wasn’t a success, to say the least.

It was one of your first day of college, and you had never seen Taeyong or any of his friends. Classes were over for the day, and you took your usual route through scary vampire territory. You had bumped into each other, and it was not the romantic kind of walking into each other. He had been running, his eyes crazy, and it scared you. It was never a good sign when someone was running through this part of town.

“Watch where you’re going.” He hissed at you, making you feel small and insecure. As if you were an animal stuck in his trap.

“I’m sorry.” Was the only thing you could say while you were avoiding his intense stare. You had always heard people talk about a vampire’s stare being mesmerizing. Still, you never realized how consuming their eyes were. It seemed to be the only thing you could focus on. It was hard to not look into his eyes, but you fought the urge.

“You should go home. Don’t talk to strangers.” He finally ordered you with concern laced in his tone. You looked up with confusion in your eyes, but that’s where you made a mistake. His eyes were dark brown, almost black-like, and it somehow didn’t scare you.

“My mom told me I shouldn’t talk to strangers, and you’re definitely strange.” You told him, and you cringed at your awkward statement. Were you trying to prove to him that you were not scared because you were, but not of him. He simply laughed at your comment before running off to wherever he was going, leaving you alone and confused. That’s when the small obsession with Taeyong began. You wanted to figure out if he really was a vampire or not, because how else you could explain your speeding heart and moist palms whenever he was near?

You had worked on a project with some of his friends, and you  still couldn’t tell if they were vampires or not. His friends ate the healthy amount of food a human boy in their twenty’s would, and they were actually approachable. You could talk to them, and you could find them at parties chatting someone’s ear off. You actually befriended one of his friends, Mark. He was the kind of person everyone got along with, including you. Taeyong was also present at these parties, but he was always standing somewhere alone in the corner. He preferred to be alone, but girls periodically tried to make a move on him, and he never seemed pleased by their presence. It was quite a hilarious scene to uphold. How the girls attempted to show their cleavage while acting tipsy to get his attention. He never looked at them, disgust expressed in his orbs while he sipped from his drink. 

You and Mark had gotten pretty close since your school project. He would take you out for lunch or would invite you to hang with some of his other friends. It was clear to anyone that you and Mark had this special bond, and both your friend groups accepted the other. He even threw you a little surprise birthday party at your favourite coffee shop. He had invited some of his friends and your friends, and it was one of the most enjoyable afternoon’s you had ever had. 

Mark had given you a birthday card where he mentioned he would always protect you, and he would even hide a body for you if necessary. He was a good friend, and you were glad he was in your life. You never knew a day would come where you would actually take him up on his offer. 

“Hi Y/N!” Mark immediately said when he picked up his phone. He seemed happy and carefree, and you hated to be the person to ruin his mood. Every time something remotely unfortunate happened to you, Mark would try everything in his power to make you feel better. You kind of felt regretful about depending on him so much. You wished you could be the same to Mark, but he never gave you a chance to worry about him.

“Mark, I…” you started, but you were in a state of shock and immediately started crying. Mark noticed your distressed behaviour, and you could hear him saying something in the background. 

“Where are you? What happened? Y/N?” Mark asked you, and you could hear him getting ready to come and pick you up. He was the only person you could depend on. You trusted him 100 per cent. 

“Second Street, corner shop.” Was the only thing you could say through your tears, but Mark knew enough. You heard a door slam, some keys jingling and a motor being being brought to life.

“Give me five minutes.” He said before hanging up, and you quietly waited for him to come and get you. You didn’t want to hang up, but you also weren’t in a state to have small talk. You simply stood there with your bike in hand. 

“Y/N!” Mark yelled through the open window of his car, but he wasn’t driving. You couldn’t see who was driving the vehicle, but you were glad he had finally arrived. It felt like you had waited hours for him to get here, but in reality, it had taken him only three minutes. 

“I think I killed it.” You whispered monotonously, and Mark looked worried by your lack of emotions. You pointed toward the small cat that was still stuck under the wheel of your bike. It didn’t really look alive, and you couldn’t remove your bike out of shock. You had stood frozen in your spot for the last half hour, chances were getting slimmer for the cat to be alive.

“You know, I was joking on that birthday card when I said I’d help you hide a body.” Mark tried to lighten the mood, but you simply presented him with your deadly glare. He seemed relieved by your typical behaviour before taking your hands off the bike to remove the murder machine.

“What happened?” A voice behind you asked, and you immediately turned around in shock. It was Taeyong, and he had probably driven Mark to the murder scene. It was the first time you had heard him speak in close proximity, and it gave you chills all over your body. This was not the time to be aroused by someone’s voice. You were currently the lead suspect of a murder case.

“She hit a cat with her bike.” Mark sighed, and relief flashed over Taeyong’s face. Why did he look so relieved? Had he been worrying about you too? 

“Are you alright?” Taeyong asked you while he moved closer to you. Mark was now examining the cat, and you were glad Taeyong was distracting you from the bloodless scene. His eyes were deep brown and merely mesmerizing, you almost forgot about the situation. Almost.

“No.” You simply said, making Taeyong chuckle lowly. You never really liked to play the damsel in distress, but you couldn’t hide your feelings. You needed their help, and you didn’t care how pathetic it made you look. You had never even killed a fly, and now you had accidentally murdered a cat.

“Do you want to bury the body?” He asked you, and all you could do was nod your head. Mark looked questionably at Taeyong but seemed to make peace with the situation. He simply shrugged his shoulders, trying to think of a solution.

“Okay,” Taeyong said before he went back to his car to grab a towel out of his gym bag. Mark stood by your side to shield you from the scene while Taeyong wrapped the lifeless body in his blue towel. 

“There isn’t a place to bury it here, though.” Mark thought out loud to Taeyong. They were looking at each other as if they were speaking through their minds. 

“We can do it in our garden, I suppose.” Taeyong finally stated. The boys turned toward you expectantly. 

“Do you want to be there?” Mark asked you softly before wrapping his arm over your shoulder. You shuddered at the contact, realizing how cold it had gotten outside. Taeyong had seemed to decipher your reaction and quickly grabbed an extra sweater out of his bag. 

“Yes.” You finally said when Taeyong had given you his sweater. You gladly accepted and put on the extra layer of warmth before following them toward the black car. The piece of clothing smelled freshly washed, and you couldn’t help but relax in the backseat while a dead animal was in the trunk. How did you always get yourself in these weird situations?

You had never gone to Mark’s house, so you did feel a bit awkward because of the situation. The only thing you knew was that he had three housemates, one of them being Taeyong. The others you had briefly met, and you do remember one of them being at your surprise birthday party. You think their names were Jungwoo and Doyoung. 

The moment the car parked in its rightful place, two guys stormed outside with worried expressions. When Taeyong opened your door, and when you made your way out, everyone seemed relieved. Again, why was everyone so concerned about you? You barely knew these people.

“What happened?”

“How’s Y/N?”

“Everything alright?”

Were a few of the questions they immediately fired toward the three of you. Taeyong looked at Mark as if to say he should handle the nosy boys, while he opened the trunk of his car. He carefully grabbed the cat wrapped up in a towel before walking out to their backyard. Everyone silently followed him, not knowing what was in the towel or what the plan was. 

Taeyong instructed his roommates to dig a hole at the edge of the garden while Mark kept you company. No one questioned Taeyong but simply followed his order. You were mesmerized by his powerful vibe, and you couldn’t help but follow his every action. How he carefully placed the dead cat on the grass to adjust the towel. How he sometimes secretly glanced toward you and Mark to check if you were still doing okay. 

When the other two boys were done digging a hole in the ground, they awkwardly awaited further instructions. Taeyong simply looked at you to see if you were ready. He probably expected a simple nod so he could place the cat in the hole, but you wanted to say a few words.

“We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a suicidal cat.” You started, and you could hear Mark hold back his laughter, his body vibrating next to you. The other two boys simply stared at you. Taeyong had to suppress a smile, and you wished you had seen him smile earlier. It was a beautiful sight to behold.

“I don’t know if he or she is a loner, or if they belong to anyone. I’m extremely remorseful of my actions, and I hope that if there is a God that he or she can forgive me. It was unintentional. May you rest in peace.” You finished your speech. Taeyong noticed and carefully placed the cat in its rightful place in their garden. The other boys skillfully closed up the hole while you softly let tears fall from your eyes. Mark noticed and gave you a tissue he kept in his jacket. He had gotten used to you crying over silly little things, so he always carried an extra tissue just in case. 

You gladly accepted the tissue before wiping your eyes. You realized you had put on make-up this morning, and you probably looked like a raccoon. You looked at Mark, and he simply nodded his head as if he just read your thoughts. 

“Shit.” You muttered under your breath, making Mark laugh. Blame it on the aftermath of shock, but you started laughing along with him. Taeyong and the other roommates looked at you with hundredth questions in their eyes, but you and Mark simply kept laughing like mad people. 

“Is she okay?” Someone asked Taeyong softly, but he simply smiled at you when he thought you weren’t looking. 

“We should get her inside before anyone sees her.” The one named Jungwoo suddenly said firmly. Taeyong simply nodded his head before he took your arm and rushed you inside. You didn’t understand what the issue was of you being seen in their garden, but you didn’t question them. They had helped you without asking you, so you returned the favour. 

“You can stay here tonight. You can sleep in my bed while I sleep on the couch.” Mark told you while he grabbed some water for you to drink. Jungwoo was ordering some pizza while Doyoung and Taeyong were softly talking in the living room. It was weird to hang out in their house when they clearly never invited anyone before. 

“Where is the bathroom?” You asked Mark after drinking the glass of water he had given you. Mark pointed toward the direction of the bathroom, and you followed his instructions. 

You were surprised by your appearance in the mirror, and not in a good way. Your face was swollen from crying, and your skin was pale from the shock. Your mascara was everywhere except on your eyelashes. To summarize, you looked like a walking mess, and you finally realized why everyone kept asking if you were okay. You undoubtedly didn’t look okay. You wiped the remaining make-up off your face and splashed your face with water, hoping to make yourself look more alive. When you were done, you made your way back toward the kitchen, but an argument was going on in the kitchen. It was about you.

“Why did you bring her here? It’s dangerous for humans to be seen around here.” Jungwoo stated firmly, and you could feel the tension rising. 

“She was alone and helpless. We couldn’t just leave her.” Mark defended himself. You hated the fact you had put him in trouble again. He was always helping you while you kept putting him in awkward situations.

“You could have driven her home.” Doyoung piped in.

“I expected this behaviour of Mark, but I didn’t think Taeyong would be so stupid,” Jungwoo said irritated. Him dropping Taeyong’s name made your heart race, and you couldn’t understand why your heart was acting this way. 

“I think she’s back,” Taeyong stated, and you had a weird feeling that he knew you were eavesdropping as if he sensed you being near. 

“Y/N I hope you like Hawaiian pizza,” Jungwoo said when you entered the kitchen, acting as if you didn’t hear the strange conversation. You simply nodded your head when you stood next to Mark. You didn’t know how to work around them, and it showed.

“I’ll bring you some clothes to get changed into,” Taeyong announced before leaving the room to get you a change of clothes. You thanked him, but he was already out of earshot. After you got changed into some sweats and another sweater of Taeyong, you guys shared pizza and watched a movie. There was a weird atmosphere that no one knew how to break, so you quickly made your way toward Mark’s room to go to sleep. 

It was strange sleeping in Mark’s bed in a house filled with boys. It was weird knowing there was a corpse of a cat buried in their garden that you had accidentally killed. However, you did sleep the full ten hours. It was Mark who had woken you up to check up on you.

“Y/N,” Mark whispered while he gently touched your forehead. You opened your eyes and were met with Mark looking worriedly at you. You noticed you were covered in sweat.

“Hi.” You croaked out, noticing your dry throat. 

“Here is some water.” Mark offered you, and you gladly accepted. “You had a bad dream. Do you remember anything?” He asked you after you drowned the whole glass. You shook your head. This wasn’t the first time you were covered in sweat when you woke up. 

“It happens from time to time. I never remember the bad dream, though.” You explained to him, but he kept looking at you as if you were a porcelain doll. “You don’t need to worry. I’m a big girl.” You joked while you showed him your imaginary muscles. This got a little chuckle out of him, but not his full contagious laugh that you loved so much.

“I have to go to school now, so I can’t drive you. Taeyong told me he has the same class as you at ten, so he will be driving you, okay?” Mark explained to you, and you could only nod your head in agreement. He quickly enveloped you in a big bro hug before leaving you in his room. 

You were going to be alone with Taeyong. You would enter your class with Taeyong by your side. All the girls will be jealous, and your friends are definitely going to want to know the story behind your entrance. You couldn’t tell them you killed a cat by accident, and called Mark while having a panic attack. Perhaps you should just tell them it was all coincidental. 

“We leave in ten minutes,” Taeyong said while knocking on Mark’s door. You realized you had stayed frozen on Mark’s bed for over an hour, and you didn’t even start to get ready.

“Let’s make it twenty.” You shouted before rushing to the bathroom to take a quick shower. You heard Taeyong laugh, and you hated the fact that you always missed it when he was laughing. For someone you’ve had spied for over a year, you had never seen him smile. Now, in the span of barely twelve hours, you had heard him laugh and seen him smile. It gave you a rush of adrenaline and a certain kind of proudness that you were able to evoke these emotions out of Taeyong. Is this how people get addicted? Is this the reason why girls keep throwing themselves at him?

You didn’t have any spare clothes, so you kept wearing Taeyong’s black hoodie and your black leggings from the day before. It wasn’t your best outfit, but it wasn’t that different than other days. When you walked out to Taeyong’s car, you did feel a little bit insecure. 

“You look great.” He softly complimented you while you seated yourself next to him. A soft blush found its way on your face, and you tried to hide it while covering your face.

“You’re only saying that because I’m wearing your hoodie.” You teased him, stunned by your own sudden confidence boost. He looked just as stunned as you at your remark, but he quickly recovered, showing off his tiny gummy smile.

“You got me. You look amazing in my clothes. You should keep the hoodie.” He told you while staring the car. You stared at his hands while he drove onto the street. Your heart started beating faster, and your palms began to sweat. 

“Thank you! I think I will.” You finally muttered when you had recovered just a little bit. If he noticed your awkward behaviour, he didn’t comment on it. But you had a feeling he knew he could make your heart lose its healthy beat. 

The moment the two of you entered your local college together, everyone stopped talking so they could look at the strange combination. Taeyong was never seen with anyone except for his three friends who were coincidentally his roommates. You understood their reaction because you would act the same if he walked with any other girl into class. You thought he would sit in his usual lonely seat at the back, but he followed you toward your fixed spot at the front. You liked to sit at the front with two of your friends. You looked questionably at Taeyong, but he simply shrugged his shoulders.

“I just want to make sure you’re okay.” He softly whispered as if understanding the question in your head, moving a bit closer to you than was sociably acceptable. His closeness made you shiver, but you tried to cover it by pretending to be cold.

“I am.” You confidently stated while you tried to ignore the rush in your body by Taeyong’s closeness. 

“You’re still pale.” He remarked, again with the same worry in his eyes as the day before. You didn’t know the guy, why the heck was he so interested in you? Maybe it was because you were close to Mark, but it still confused you. You hadn’t really spoken to Taeyong before yesterday, and now he was sitting next to you in class?

“I’m always pale.” You deadpanned while taking your seat. Taeyong quickly followed and occupied the chair next to you. He softly opened up his backpack to get his notebook and pencil while you eyed him suspiciously. 

“I really don’t like this class.” He whispered, and you could feel the stare of your friends on your back. Why was the Taeyong whispering something in your ear? You ignored him for the remainder of the lesson, as his presence was already distracting enough. 

After class your parted ways, you had an economics class, while he had to do something else you didn’t ask about. Your friends fired question after question the moment Taeyong was out of earshot, but you had a feeling he could hear everything they said by the small smile on his face. You tried to answer as honestly as possible, but you mainly kept up the facade of it being an accident. That both of you run into each other on accident. They seemed to believe you, and you continued your day as if nothing had ever happened. 

You walked your usual route back home while it was already getting dark out. You had stayed longer at the library than planned, but it didn’t matter that much to you. You liked the colours of the sky when the sun was setting, reminding you of carefree times you spent your holidays on your grand parent’s farm. 

You hadn’t noticed a figure following you, and you also hadn’t felt the air getting colder and colder the more you got in the vampire district. You hugged yourself trying to get a bit warmer, but the cold was creeping in your bones. You looked at your phone, but there were no new messages, making you feel alone. 

“Why is a beautiful girl like yourself walking all alone at night?” Someone commented, and you quickly turned around toward the source of the voice. It was a handsome young man you had never seen before. Your town really was filled with beautiful young men with mesmerizing eyes. You noticed their eyes to be a reddish colour, and it did scare you, but not enough.

“It’s barely night time. The sun is still in the sky.” You corrected the stranger as if you were old friends. He seemed surprised by your answer as if he hadn’t expected a bratty response.

“I see why they like you.” He simply stated, making you look at him with confusion. Who was he talking about? He started laughing, and his laugh was low and a bit scary. You know this cliché villain laughs, well he had one like that. 

“I” m Jaehyun.” He introduced himself, walking closer to you. You took a few steps back, but he simply smirked at your actions.

“Okay.” You answered him while your back was against the corner of the street. There was no one to see you. You were alone with this stranger, who you felt had bad intentions. 

“What’s your name?” He asked you softly, still making his way closer to you. He was only an arm’s length away from you, and you didn’t know how to get out of this situation. 

“I don’t see why that’s important.” You told him, but this must have been the wrong answer. His smile disappeared, and annoyance transformed his face into something grim. Something you didn’t want to witness. He moved closer until he was right in front of you, and you could smell his evil intentions. You had never seen this man before, and it scared you. His hand softly touched your face while he sniffed the side of your neck. His lips barely touching your sensitive skin. You stood there frozen, not knowing how to handle the situation, while you felt his teeth scraping at your skin. 

You thought this was going to be the end. You knew the guy must be a vampire, so you didn’t try to run as it was useless. They were faster and all-round better at anything than humans. You were scared, and you expected his bite any second when he was forcefully removed from you. You didn’t dare to open your eyes, but you heard someone crying in pain. 

The moment you opened your eyes, you couldn’t understand what was going on before you. Taeyong was moving incredibly fast; you could barely follow him with your eyes, but he seemed to be the one with the upper hand. The Jaehyun guy tried to fight back, but Taeyong was filled with rage the other guy barely didn’t have a chance. 

“Taeyong!” You yelled, trying to stop him from killing the other. He held Jaehyun in his arms, ready to snap his neck, but he stopped when he heard the desperation in his voice.

“Do you have to kill him?” You asked him softly, looking into his eyes. He looked puzzled by your question.

“He’s been biting humans around here even though he knows there is a truce.” He told you a matter of factly, but you weren’t satisfied with his answer.

“Are you alone, Jaehyun?” You asked the guy Taeyong was holding firmly in his deadly grip. You didn’t know why you were trying to save the scary vampire’s life, but you already killed a cat this week. You couldn’t handle any more blood on your hands. 

“Why does it matter? You want to adopt me?” He spat back at you, and you almost wanted to turn around and let Taeyong do whatever he was planning to do. 

“Isn’t that better than dying?” You asked him softly. You touched his face, mimicking the action he had done to you earlier. His were still franticly searching for a way out, and you could feel he was a lost cause. But you didn’t want to give up on him so easily. There was a glimmer of desperation in his eyes as if he wanted to be killed. As if he knew someone was out there protecting you. 

“I’ve been dead for over twenty years now.” nHe simply stated, his body relaxing a bit as if he was showing his true colours. 

“You’re relatively young.” You remarked. Your eyes locked with Taeyong’s and he seemed to understand your plan. Somehow he had a perfect instinct on how you felt. It comforted you to know he actually listened to you and respected your opinion even though he didn’t really seem to agree.

“Don’t tell me you plan to take him home?” He asked you in disbelief, but he already knew the answer.

“Not my home.” You shrugged, looking over at his car that was still parked in the middle of the empty road. 

“Get in the car.” He commanded, and you followed his order as if your life depended on it. Taeyong locked the unknown vampire in his trunk as if he was used to tying up depressed vampires. The ride back to his home was quiet and filled with a thick tension you didn’t want to break. He looked deep in thought, and you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. 

“I remember a year ago where I told you not to talk to strangers.” He finally spoke while he parked his car in front of his house. You didn’t know how to answer him, so you just got out of the vehicle.

“Aren’t you scared?” He asked you forcefully. He was annoyed by your behaviour, but you weren’t scared. You had never been scared of vampires, and you could never be frightened of Taeyong. 

“Should I be scared?” You asked him softly while you looked into his eyes. He seemed to soften a little, but he still looked pissed at your behaviour.

“Yes! He tried to kill you.” He stated, and you simply shrugged your shoulders at his comment.

“I don’t think he actually tried to kill me. He was waiting for you to tear him away from me.” You explained to Taeyong while Mark went outside to inspect the noise you two were making.

“Y/N? What happened? What are you doing here?” Mark asked you immediately when he saw you. He inspected you from head to toe to see if anything was off, but you looked perfectly fine.

“Your friend has adopted a vampire.” Taeyong simply explained to mark while his eyes bore into yours. 

“What?” Mark questioned him again as if he hadn’t heard him correctly.

“You heard me. We’ll set him up in the basement. Tell the others.” Taeyong commanded Mark while he grabbed your arm and pushed you inside the house. “And you, you stay in the kitchen.” He told you when you were safely inside the house. Mark went back inside, yelling for the others to come down, while Taeyong grabbed Jaehyun from his trunk. 

You listened to Taeyong and waited in the kitchen. You had no clue what the others were doing in the basement, but you didn’t hear any noises to make you feel worried. Mark was the first to come up, but he seemed as cheerful as ever. 

“Taeyong is going to drive you home. I’m staying with Jaehyun.” Mark told you while you were scrolling through your phone. You were glad to spend some more time with Taeyong, but at the same time, it made you feel worried. Was he going to scold you?

“He’s not pissed. Don’t worry.” Mark explained when he saw your worried expression. You relaxed a little bit but still acted stiff. The past 24 hours had been tiring, to say the least.

“I’ve brought enough trouble into this house.” You confessed while you looked down at your hands. Mark quickly came over to your side to wrap you into a big bro hug.

“You’re a troublemaker, I’m not going to deny that.” He whispered with a teasing smile which you gladly returned.

“Are you trying to make me feel better?” You asked him with a raised eyebrow, earning a wholesome laugh out of him.

“I don’t know how to handle this situation.” He confessed finally.

“I’m not scared of you, and I would like to keep my best friend.” You told him earnestly. He looked relieved by your answer.

“You’re never going to lose me.” He told you. His arm was still around you when Taeyong returned to the kitchen. He had his car keys in hand, signalling you to move. You said your goodbye to Mark and followed Taeyong outside. 

The moment you stepped into his car, a strange awkwardness filled the small space. Your heart was racing, and not because you were scared, but because Taeyong was near.

“Why aren’t you scared? You should be scared of me. I could tear you apart in a second.” He finally broke the silence when you were almost at your house.

“Do you want me to be scared of you?” You asked him while fidgeting with your hands. You seemed to do that a lot around him.

“I’m no good.” He confessed softly. You looked over at him, and he looked like a broken man. He probably had never chosen this life, and it made you think that Jaehyun and Mark also seemed like they didn’t want to be like this. It made you feel sad, and you tried to comfort him, but you didn’t know how to. He pulled over in front of your parent’s house, but you didn’t want to get out just yet. You finally had him close to you, and you weren’t letting him go that easily.

“My parents warned me about drugs and freaks in the streets, but never the ones with the hazel eyes and the missing heartbeats.” As you looked into his eyes, you could feel him searching deep into your soul. “I’m not scared, because you have never given me a reason to. You were there when I needed you most.” You explained to him while he kept his eyes fixed on you. His brown eyes showed you the admiration he had for you, it made you feel dizzy and bold. You cupped his face into your hands. He let it happen as if he had anticipated your behaviour.

“You’re a special one, aren’t you?” He said while his hand found their way to your face. He gently stroked your cheek, as if he was afraid to scare you away. He looked at you as if you were a porcelain doll, and you didn’t mind. He had never looked at any of the other girls in your town. He had never even given them a second glance, and here he was comfortably stroking your face in his car. Here you were with a Taeyong who looked at you as if you were extraordinary beautiful. Like you were important.

“Only for you.” You whispered, but your speeding heart gave you away. He must have heard the change of pace because he suddenly broke out into an adorable smile.

“What are you doing Friday?” He asked you, and you couldn’t hide your excitement.

“I’m free.” You told him eagerly. “I have absolutely no plans.” You continued, which made Taeyong laugh that soft giggle of his. You had a feeling you were the only human who had ever heard him laugh like this.

“Do you maybe want to go to a movie or something?” He stuttered softly. If he weren’t a vampire, he probably would’ve been blushing. You tried to calm yourself down, but with butterflies in your stomach and a head buzzing with possibilities, there was no way you could control your speeding heart.

“Are you asking me out on a date?” You asked him teasingly, masking the sound of your heart leaping out of your chest.

“If that’s okay with you.” He asked for your permission, which almost made your heart combust into a million pieces. Could your heart survive a date with Taeyong? You weren’t so sure.

“Absolutely.” You told him. You quickly gave him a kiss on his cheek before running inside. Your action might have been bold, but you regretted your straightforwardness. It was clear Taeyong had never asked anyone out on a date, and maybe you shouldn’t have tried to push his buttons. You sneaked a glance outside, and Taeyong was still parked in front of your house. You saw him touching his cheek with a soft smile, before driving off. You were almost sure you wouldn’t survive a date with Taeyong.

[iwach4n]

this is basically an AU me and @snazzieyama have been talking about where haikyuu characters are the actors in Hamilton, and i haven’t been able to get it out of my mind so have an obnoxiously long set of headcanons about it

(i wrote this listening to the soundtrack, proper jamming i tell you)

CAST LIST (hear me out on some of these)

alexander hamilton - hinata shoyo

aaron burr - akaashi keiji

eliza schuyler - kageyama tobio

angelica schuyler - atsumu miya

peggy schuyler - yachi hitoka

john laurens / phillip hamilton - nishinoya yuu

marquis de laffayette - bokuto koutarou

hercules mulligan - tanaka ryuunosuke

george washington - sawamura daichi

thomas jefferson - tsukishima kei

james madison - yamaguchi tadashi

king george III - oikawa tooru

maria reynolds - kozume kenma

james reynolds / the doctor - kuroo tetsurou

samuel seabury - sugawara koushi

charles lee - lev haiba

george eacker - yaku morisuke

the bullet - shimizu kiyoko

HEADCANONS

hinata auditioned for hamilton despite having literally no theatre experience besides like school musicals and like one community theatre show. he was cast in ensemble at first but worked his way up to hamilton’s understudy and then the official hamilton

tsukishima auditioned for burr. he was salty that he was cast as someone else (his dynamic with yamaguchi was too good to pass up and akaashi had a better voice for Wait For It) at first but then he immediately clashed with hinata and took great pleasure with being able to roast him every night

in Alexander Hamilton, the laffayette/jefferson and mulligan/madison parts switch actors every show so bokuto, tsukishima, tanaka and yamaguchi all get to do it. sometimes they switch it at the last minute because “please dude my grandma’s come to watch i need to be on stage as much as possible”

tanaka has the Best fun on stage. he never fails to get the crowd pumped, he is jumping around and bringing so much energy, especially in his part in yorktown. it makes you mad that its a musical and you can’t start jumping up and singing along

suga was cast as seabury because he was perfectly good at the role and they preferred kageyama as eliza, which he auditioned for originally. he’s really good at it but it took way too long for Farmer Refuted to come together because him and hinata kept bursting out laughing. they both consider each other, like, the least threatening people ever, and they couldn’t take it seriously whenever hinata would have to get in suga’s face

SOMETIMES IT STILL HAPPENS!! if you watch carefully, you might see one of their lips twitch while they try to keep a straight face. the minute suga gets off stage, someone always has some cushion or piece of clothing he can laugh into because once he started laughing while his mic was still on

THE BIGGEST CAST JOKE IS ABOUT THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HAMILTON AND ELIZA!! kageyama looks so much taller than hinata (coz he is but its so noticeable when they’re alone on stage) and they torment hinata with pictures where it just looks ridiculous

oikawa always absolutely steals the show. he’s so dramatic, but he’s also one of the most simped-for cast members and sometimes he’ll throw a wink into the audience in the middle of You’ll Be Back to make things more interesting. 

also the bits in act 2 where he just comes in to watch and laugh at everything that’s happening? he’s so fun! just because he’s not the main focus of the scene doesn’t mean he isn’t gonna make the most hilarious facial expressions. half the audience ends up focusing on him instead.

daichi is the most commanding washington literally ever. he just comes on and he immediately takes over the stage. he barely has to try to give the character the air of authority. literally the perfect actor for the role

he’s also been in the show the longest. was cast as washington right off the bat and has been doing the role for multiple years. it makes him the unofficial dad of the cast and the go-to for advice since he’s seen a bunch of people do every other role

the “CALL ME SON ONE MORE TIME” line was another one that took too long for them to do without laughing. daichi has been doing this for ages but when he practices with hinata, he can’t help but laugh because this is the kid who he witnessed choke on hello kitty gummies with five minutes until the show began (back when hinata was in ensemble). hinata does the line too well and its hard to take it seriously at first

akaashi singing Wait For It is the literal most beautiful part of the show. he’s an amazing actor and his voice is incredible and it’s the sort of thing you could rewatch on loop for an entire week non-stop without getting bored

bokuto got akaashi the audition for burr, and even though their characters don’t interact too much their chemistry is really good. The “everyone give it up for everyone’s favourite fighting frenchman!” line is so genuine they just really admire each other as actors

lev auditioned for lee for the sole purpose of getting the line “i’m a general, WHEEEE”. he got the role mostly because he was just,,, really good at that line

atsumu refused to interact with anyone outside of rehearsals and performances for a solid month. the instagram of the cast had loads of photos on the story that were just mugshots of him saying “day 24, atsumu still won’t talk to us :(” whenever any of the cast take over it for a day

akaashi is the second most simped-for actor in the cast (after oikawa). you can literally feel people in the audience swooning in Dear Theodosia because he’s just so sweet

when yachi found out she was the only girl in the main cast she was literally terrified. she latched onto kiyoko really quickly and there’s a ridiculous amount of pictures that every fan has seen of those two together

kiyoko is really mesmerising as the bullet!! when she’s lifted her form is just stunning she just looks really nice okay-

every wondered whether kageyama would be like,,, actually good because he just seems kind of awkward off stage, but the minute he’s on stage and following a script, he’s like the perfect eliza

nishinoya has the perfect range for both laurens and phillip. fun and friendly yet still principled and serious rebel? check. small sweet nine year old? check. charismatic flirt? check. heartbreakingly dying from a gunshot wound? check.

tsukishima is a really unique jefferson. he’s not as flamboyant as the role usually is, but he’s super sassy to make up for it. it’s really refreshing and SO fun to watch. “uh,,, france?” becomes “france.” with a ‘are you stupid’ expression

yamaguchi wasn’t expecting to get anything past ensemble but he came in to audition with tsukishima and he is so good at what few lines he has. “which I wrote!” is said with such a scandalised tone, it gets a laugh every time

everyone who knew kenma before thought he’d be too awkward to do maria but he is actually really good once he gets past the initial awkwardness, he manages to portray her like a victim really well

i’ve already done like two of these so here’s some more scenes that took too long before they didn’t burst out laughing: eliza teaching phillip to play piano in Take A Break (just imagine nishinoya and kageyama doing it i can’t-), the duel in Ten Duel Commandments (the height difference between nishinoya and lev made them laugh every time they turned around), 90% of Say No To This but especially the kiss (kenma would just stop and get off like ‘no, i can’t, i can’t do this’ every time it was about to happen while hinata just started cackling)

part of the reason noya got cast as phillip as well as laurens was because he’s one of the only people who auditioned who was shorter than hinata

in rehearsals, akaashi has fallen off the table from The Room Where It Happens because they couldn’t time him jumping while the tablecloth was pulled off. there’s a compilation of the falls on youtube, no one knows who recorded them, let alone who posted it (it was kuroo)

speaking of kuroo, he takes his like five lines and he runs with them. he’s awesome as james reynolds but he’s also the fandoms favourite instagram of the cast because he just posts all the backstage shenanigans. he’s somehow always recording whenever something is going wrong.

he also teases kenma relentlessly about how their characters are married, but kenma is having none of it. it always goes like “awe we’re married” “,,, you’re literally abusive” or “come on, do it for your husband” “i’m cheating on you”

(i stopped here to jam to That Part of Hurrican. i wrote my way out hell i wrote my way to revolution i was louder than the crack in the bell i wrote eliza love letters until she fell-)

bokuto managed to rap Guns And Ships first try. he listened to it like twice, read the lyrics, and he could immediately do it. he took ages to do a convincing french accent though, and it pained everyone

TSUKISHIMA COULDN’T DO THE FAST PART OF WASHINGTON ON YOUR SIDE AND HAD TO ASK BOKUTO FOR HELP

bokuto is just,,, such a good laffayette. he’s jumping all over the place, flexing his muscles while he does the fast raps without looking out of breath at all. it seems almost impossible

also!!!! kuroo has a ridiculous amount of videos of bokuto backstage fortnite dancing to serious songs like Burn or Its Quiet Uptown

kageyama in Burn!!! heartbreaking and beautiful but he burns his hand on the letter too often. he’s gotten used to it at this point so he only slightly flinches when the flames touch his hand. its worrying

congratulations was almost brought back because atsumu really likes it and he absolutely kills it. they recorded him singing it in like a studio and everything because its just that good

when noya found out yaku was playing eacker he was so happy because they’re both short and he already looks ridiculous and tiny enough in the first duel

tsukishima will never admit how much fun he has with “southern motherfucking democratic republicans!!!” but its so clear his eyes literally shine (he kind of carries that line coz yamaguchi and akaashi are a lot more mellow)

oikawa once got dared to fortnite dance in reynolds pamphlet when he’s throwing the one singular sheet of paper. he was going to do it but the directors found out about it and literally threatened to fire him if he did it (they did it in a rehearsal to make up for it)

you know that bit in Your Obedient Servant where its like “careful how you proceed good man, intemperate indeed good man, answer for the accusations i lay at your feet or prepare to bleed good man”? literal chills from the look on akaashi’s face when he does it

whenever other cast members get food gifts from fans and they leave them unattended atsumu will always steal them. only daichi has figured out its him and he has kept quiet on two conditions - he leaves his alone, and he gets half of all the cakes

sometimes yachi just likes to lie down in the middle of the spinny floor and spin to destress. yamaguchi joins her sometimes.

there’s always a ton of people waiting at stage door, and kuroo has made it his mission to come out first and announce everyone as they leave. people play along with it and cheer for every person. some of the cast (mainly oikawa and bokuto) make it super dramatic and do massive bows as they walk out. kageyama never fails to look bewildered despite it happening every day

oikawa chills in full king gear backstage way before and way after he needs to. like half of his instagram is selfies is him in it doing dramatic poses. he’s broken the crown too many times because it fell off his head

hinata sometimes subconsciously does the My Shot dance while he’s going about his life. he can’t escape

they can be sorted into three groups: is the literal sweetest baby to their fans and is kind of shocked they even exist, adores having fans and fully expects them to exist, and the ‘i appreciate the support but pls leave me alone i want to go home’

i don’t know how to round this off but this is getting too long and its gonna keep on going because i’m listening to the soundtrack as i write. maybe there will be a part 2 one day.

[ethelphantom]

What’s a Soulmate?

Heeeeeyyy so I'm here again even though I'm totally supposed to be studying for my upcoming exam week (I've got seven exams coming once Thursday arrives on every single day except for the weekend. Oh well.

This is based on the What's a Soulmate? audio thing that went around a lot more before, and I've been wanting to write something based on it for years now. So. You're getting a Daminette fic based on it.

If you're still HOPEFULLY reading this, here's a little thing. This fic WILL get very angsty (like, heavy angst and grief and death and stuff) BUT it will also get way better later. There's a happy ending, their story will get a happy ending, and this will NOT end like Of Flowers and Strawberries, I swear, seriously. Pinky promise and all that. So, once you get there, just keep reading. You'll get your happy ending.

Ao3 || The audio

This is Maribat -- don’t like, don’t read.

________

“What's a soulmate?”

A girl with black hair leans against a boy around her age, his hair just as black as hers. He wraps his arms around her shoulders and kisses her forehead like the rest of the world didn’t matter. Their intertwined fingers bring them comfort as they watch the sunset on the horizon, painting the world in warm, calming tones of red, orange and yellow.

It doesn’t matter that they know their time is limited. They are together now, and that is all that mattered in the world.

After all, the memories they had together were everything.

“It's a… Well, it's like a best friend, but more.”

“I hope you two have a good explanation for this.”

The girl looks at the boy, both considering their next words carefully. They absolutely cannot let his older brother know how the kitchen and garden caught on fire at the same time as though on cue even though they weren’t even in the house, because everyone else is too scared to do such a thing. Especially with the butler still in the house, prepared to scold them and take away their rights to spend time together for a while.

Maybe they would deserve it and all, but it doesn’t matter. The children do not want to spend any less time together regardless of their actions.

“We have three, actually,” the girl says and tilts her head with feigned innocence. All of them know she’s responsible for whatever she’s being accused of this time, just like the boy is, but they don’t really care. If there’s anyone that could pull off looking innocent while covered in blood and then get away with murder, it would be her. No doubt.

“Pick your favourite,” the boy tells his older brother, only to make him exasperated and sigh as he buries his head in his hands. It seems they’re going to get away with it again. Like always. They never have the energy to deal with the both of them at once. Perhaps going over this with one of them at a time wouldn't be too much to him, but as it is, he tried to save time and scold both of them at once.

“Fine, you can go,” his brother finally tells them and leaves, muttering something about children being impossible and him not understanding how they keep succeeding.

The boy grabs the girl’s hand and squeezes it. “I told you, Malaki, didn’t I? We can do anything together, even survive my older brother’s intervention.”

“So you did, mon cœur. So you did.”

—

“What’s the plan for our next grand scheme?”

“I have an idea!”

“That’s wonderful. What is it?”

“Well, it involves fire—”

“Absolutely fucking not.”

After all, they ended up getting along like a house on fire.

“It's the one person in the world who knows you better than anyone else.”

If there was one place in the world where you’d least expect to find either of them, it would probably be under the table in a gala. Yet, times and times again, that was exactly where one of them always found the other. Usually, crying or at the very least uncomfortable with the situation around them.

The year they announced they were engaged to one another to the world was the first (and perhaps last) time this didn’t happen even though they weren’t comfortable in the least with the people around them. They weren’t even allowed to be with each other as people crowded each of them separately, asking how and when and why everything happened. After all, they had kept their relationship secret until now.

From the corner of his eye, Damian noticed the clear discomfort on his habibti’s face. No one was allowed to do that to her. None of them even noticed how horrible they were making her feel — she was on the brink of tears but kept smiling through it. They didn’t give her any personal space, not even space to breathe. His habibti was strong, but this wasn't a situation when she should need to be.

Damian made his way through the crowds to Marinette, not caring for a second if it meant having to push people out of his way with force, if it meant someone might get hurt because of him and his actions. All that mattered (and the only one that mattered) was his habibti and that she was not comfortable.

As he saw someone with a glass full of wine, he got a great idea. He made sure he walked into them, or that they walked into him, and that their drink would spill on him. He detested the feeling of being in wet clothing and smelling like alcohol more than he could even begin to explain, but what wouldn’t he do for his beloved.

The person began apologising over and over to Damian, him being his father’s heir and all, but he just glared at them and walked off to his fiancée.

“Malaki, I am afraid this imbecile spilled their drink on me, and you know how much I hate smelling like alcohol. Could you perhaps help me clean up and change into dry clothing?” he asked, knowing he sounded exactly like the rich, arrogant, self-centered, entitled brat he was raised to be and everyone thought he truly was. It was fine, as long as it was for her and she knew what he was doing.

“Look at him, forcing her to leave such a wonderful event for him. To help him when he could very well do so by himself. So selfish.”

“Shut it! If he hears you, you might get kicked out! He’s the son of Bruce Wayne!”

“Well, if he wanted his only biological son not to be bad-mouthed, he ought to not take him to this kind of places.”

Damian didn’t pay any attention to them and just held her hand, as though ready to drag her away with him. Both of them knew that was not what it was for, though. It was reassurement that he was there for her, that he was going to save her if she so wished.

The squeeze of his hand confirmed Marinette did want it.

“Of course I will. Let’s go. I’ll have Tim inform your father about this,” she said, trying not to look so relieved to get away, but the look in her eyes betrayed it to him easily.

Damian kissed her hand and led her away through the masses, ignoring any and all unpleasant comments directed at him. He knew she was uncomfortable, and for her, he would do anything, he could take anything, he could endure anything.

After all, Marinette was his everything.

“It's someone who makes you a better person.”

A long time ago, Damian thought he could get anything and everything at the snap of his fingers because he was the grandson of the Ra’s al Ghul, and then he thought he could have everyone at his every beck and call because he was the blood son and the legal heir of the Bruce Wayne. Of the Batman. They would start dancing to his music the second he told them so, that much was sure.

And he treated people like one would expect him to precisely because of that mindset no one ever helped him to lose.

He could get anything he wanted, and he was sure that even the most expensive things in the world where obtainable because he had the money. Or, his father had, but it wasn’t like he wouldn’t have gotten anything he wanted anyway.

Dying certainly didn’t ease things. After all, his father and mother had gone to great lengths only to resurrect him. That must have meant he was worth more than others. He was worth more than his brothers. Of course he was, he was his father’s true son. If they had died, the rest would have stayed dead; no one would have desperately tried to find a way to get them back.

People around him didn’t matter, no matter whether they were family or foe. If he didn’t need them, he could simply discard them and show them he didn’t care at all. Because he didn’t. Even if he needed them, he rarely spoke to them with much respect — the only ones that he thought deserved his respect were his father, Alfred, his mother and his grandfather. No one else mattered.

And then…

Then there was a girl.

No, there was the girl.

The girl who saw him.

Someone who took one look at him and decided that no, she was not going to do whatever he wanted her to no matter who he was because she was her own person and he did not own her. She did not belong to him, she did not owe him anything. She looked at him, truly looked at him, and saw how lonely his behaviour and actions made him.

“Marinette. My name is Marinette.”

Yes, Marinette was the first to actually see him and see through him. He kept trying to push her away, but she was determined to see things through as long as she didn’t make him uncomfortable — and she knew exactly when to back off even when he wasn’t able to express his discomfort. Every. Single. Time.

Slowly, as time passed by, they became friends. He started to see the value of his family, understand their lives were worth something. Marinette smiled when talked about his brothers with a hint of respect for the first time near her.

Then best friends. He knew he valued his family a lot, they were worth so much it didn’t take him even half of a second to go to their defense, even if he still hardly showed any of the care he held for his family to them. Marinette beamed when he admitted he loved them for the first time. She threw herself at him and hugged him tight when he made an offhand comment about other people he didn’t even know having some kind of a basic worth because they were human.

It took a long time, but as she snuggled closer to him and he kissed her forehead while they watched the fire dance in the hearth, he knew that there was something he could never obtain with money or fame. There was one thing more precious than any other, one thing that he could only get once he admitted he was only rich in the literal sense of the word.

Marinette had made him understand that he would only be rich once he had something he couldn’t buy with money — something that had a name, a face and feelings. Something that could walk away if he fucked up. Something that loved him and that he loved back with all his heart.

Or perhaps, someone rather than something.

Damian learnt that other people were valuable when he finally let Marinette show and teach him that the world was also a good place that held so many opportunities to learn from if he just knew to look for them.

And truly, Damian learnt that other people mattered, regardless of whether they were family or foe, because they were human. He wouldn’t need to like all of them and he could hold some people more dear to him than others, but no one was worth nothing.

But he knew that Marinette would still be the most precious and valuable thing he could ever have, and god forbid if he didn’t do his damnedest to make sure she knew that and that he wouldn’t lose her.

After all, Marinette was worth everything.

“Actually, they don't make you a better person,”

“I’m glad you came into Damian’s life, Teacup,” Dick told Marinette one day while they were watching Damian and Jason spar. Tim was working as a referee, Marinette and Dick were there simply to enjoy themselves and make sure Damian and Jason didn’t kill each other… or Tim. All of the three were a little too important to them for them to lose.

“What do you mean?” she asked in turn though she didn’t take her eyes off her boy. She was cheering for him, albeit quietly, because she knew there was a chance she could be a distraction and that meant Jason’s win.

“Your love for him is so…” Dick seemed to try and search for a fitting word as he tilted his head, “unconditional . No matter what he does, you still love him and accept him, so long as he understands how his actions may affect others and then does accordingly. You don’t let him push you away, but you also don’t let him walk over you or hurt you if you can help it. You’re good to him.”

“But you do that as well, don’t you?”

“No. I mean, yeah, I do, but it’s more out of obligation as his family. Even I might not be able to tolerate him as much as you have if I were not his older brother. But you, you came into his life and stayed. You’ve changed him and made him a better person.”

Marinette stayed quiet for a while after that, watching the boys solemnly. She rested her head in her hands and sighed before she closed her eyes. “No,” she said and shook her head. “I have not made him a better person.”

“But you—”

“Dick, no. He’s changed, yes, and I know he’s changed the most after I came into his life, but perhaps it’s just that he needed a different perspective to things. He kept pushing everyone away but he was lonely, so the least I could do was to be there and stay there. Or help him find someone else. All that’s changed in him… it was all him. People don’t change that much if they aren’t willing to, but he actively and consciously worked on himself to become a better person. Don’t take that credit away from him and give it to me,” she replied.

Dick huffed with a smile on his face. Marinette certainly was good for Damian. That boy better not fuck it up.

As Damian won and Jason lay on the ground, defeated, Marinette jumped up and cheered before she ran to Damian and tackled him on the ground with a hug. Dick smiled and walked to his family, congratulating both of his brothers. He was glad she was in their lives, in Damian’s life, because she had so much love to give, and while she was not good at taking, Damian was determined to make sure she couldn’t go without receiving a lot in return.

Because after all, she loved him with her everything, and he too loved her everything.

“you do that yourself…”

Changing oneself was more difficult than Damian wanted to admit. Everything had always been so easy to him (or at least it had been far less difficult than this was), so much had just been handed to him.

But this?

Yeah, no. He hated it and he didn’t want to do it. It was annoying, he didn’t want to change, and all of this was so horrible.

The thing was, it didn’t matter that he didn’t want it — for himself, at least. The reason as to why he needed to do it was because there was someone he couldn’t keep treating like he did now. That also meant having to change. He wanted to change for her, he wanted to be able to give her what she deserved — and she deserved so much good. Damian couldn’t let himself keep being like he was now.

Marinette loved and loved and loved, and she kept coming back to him no matter how he was like to her. She didn’t give up. That said, whenever he went too far, she didn’t hesitate to call him out, sometimes even in front of other people, even if she did it politely and didn’t try to insult or offend him in any way — no, she went out of her way to try and avoid it, because, to quote her, “no one, even you, should be treated like that, because everyone deserves being shown respect.”

Well, he was fairly sure she always mumbled something about a Lila not deserving respect, but he decided to ignore it… for now.

And so, he looked up what he could do to change and started doing those things actively. Or trying to do so, anyway.

He found himself biting his tongue more often than he ever had just to keep himself from saying something that Marinette deemed offensive or insulting to other people. He started reading people to find what were their weak points, not because he wanted to hurt them, but because he wanted to avoid doing so. And maybe it was a bit because if they dared to hurt his friends, he would know perfectly how and where to strike them.

Then, once he knew how to do that and didn’t need to pay as much attention to it as he had at the beginning, he started trying to do one kind thing to people every day — and someone other than Marinette, Jon or Colin. To them he managed to be an alright person more often than any other people. Sometimes it was helping them with their schoolwork, sometimes it was defending someone from harassment or bullying, sometimes it was as simple as being polite and thanking them. Like Marinette told him, he didn’t need to conquer the world for anyone — on the days he was too tired to do much, the simple “thank you” or holding a door open for someone was more than enough.

And slowly but surely, he started finding himself feeling better. It was easier to let go of anger, his relationships with other people improved, he didn’t snap at people all so easily. It was rather refreshing to, for once, hear other people say something positive about him instead of complaining about his actions.

All because he had once decided Marinette deserved better than him, but he still wanted to be the one beside her. That had meant working on himself to become the person he thought she deserved, a person worthy of her.

After all, she deserved everything.

“...because they inspire you.”

“Hey, Damian?”

“Yes, Malaki? What is it you’re thinking about?”

Marinette massaged Damian’s hand with her thumb, trying to decide how she wanted to voice her thoughts.

“I— I’m proud of you,” she finally decided. Marinette smiled at her boyfriend, happy she was able to spend time with him. “You’ve grown so much in the past few years and even months I’ve known you. I’m not sure what is the main reason for that, but that doesn’t matter, I’m just happy you seem to be doing better nowadays. Are you?”

Damian huffed and squeezed her hand. “Yes, I am. And you, sadiqti alhabiba (my beloved girlfriend), you were what drove me to change. You deserve so much and I wanted to be worthy of you and worthy of your love,” he replied, pressing a soft kiss on her lips. “And I thank you for that.”

Chuckling, Marinette leant against him and closed her eyes, knowing that she was safe as long as he was with her. She didn’t need to be on her guard all the time.

“You’re a fool.”

“A fool? Perhaps, but then I am a fool in love with the angel who decided I was worth fighting for.”

After all, she thought he was worth her time.

“A soulmate is someone who you can carry with you forever.”

His breathing got significantly faster as he frantically tried to look for his beloved, and once his eyes landed on her body some metres away, they widened in horror. He could only barely see her from the smoke that obscured his vision, but the blood staining the ground and her petite body was more than easy to spot.

He kicked the man in front of him away, with much more force than he knew was necessary, but it didn’t matter to him — he just needed to get to her. Nothing else mattered right at that moment.  

Damian ran towards his beloved, coughing the smoke out of his lungs. He covered his mouth and nose to keep himself from breathing all of it, but his hand fell when he finally saw Marinette in front of him.

Dead.

Her eyes were wide open, red from all the impurities in the air, and the streams of her tears were still visible on her face as ash and dust had dyed them dark. Her mouth was still open in a silent scream that never got out of her lungs, because there was a clear bullet shot gone through the left side of her chest and a blade had impaled her throat.

Why, oh why hadn’t she worn her miraculous suit that day?

Why had he let her go out without it?

And why had he let her come with him — he knew they were up against the League of Assassins.

Damian gathered her small body in his arms, bringing her close to his chest and holding her tight. He’d be damned if he let anything worse happen to her, he’d be damned if he let her body be taken away from her.

“You—” Damian choked out the word and tried to keep his tears at bay, batting them away from his eyes. “You made me love you— you made me let you in and you—” He breathed in sharply and tried to regain his composure, but it was nearly impossible. He clutched her tighter in his arms as though she was just injured and he needed to get her away from there…

But he knew that wasn’t possible. “And then you died in my arms.” The last words were barely breathed out because he couldn’t— he wasn’t able to get his voice out. It was stuck in his throat along with the lump that made it so hard to breathe, so hard to stay up and standing when he would have rather crumbled then and there.

“You’re on your own!” he yelled to his comms, knowing he didn’t need to but he couldn’t help it right then and there. He could only hope Red Robin and Red Hood were alright with it, that they would survive without him and Marinette, because he knew he wouldn’t be able to fight longer than this without needing to kill the ones that were the reason his beloved was dead.

There was no doubt about it. If he stayed, he would kill the ones that were the reason they were even fighting to make them pay.

...And she would not be happy about it.

As it turned out, they won. Both his mother and grandfather were dead, the League was gone from the face of the earth (they would create it again one day, but they were gone for now and that was better than it had been for the longest time now. His beloved’s death wasn’t in vain.

Her funeral was a quiet affair.

It wouldn’t have even been necessary as she had wanted to be cremated, but he had insisted on it. Damian wouldn’t have wanted her to be cremated, but he knew it had been her request so he never attempted to not let it happen. That’s why the least he could do was to make sure there was at least a funeral for her. He dressed up in white and black for the funeral, which was the reason he stood out in the crowd, but he couldn't care less.

He was allowed to keep his wife’s ashes in their home, though he did spread some of them around the Wayne family’s lands since she had enjoyed spending time there a lot. Damian needed to make sure that her last place (or places, he supposed) of rest would be one she loved— no, had loved, because she was dead now — when she was still there in the world with him. She had been too young to die. They had barely graduated from university a few years earlier. She didn’t deserve it.

His brothers tried to console her. They really did. Cain tried her best as well, just staying there with him in silence while each of them did their own thing, letting the other one grieve. It was nice. If there was anything good about Marinette’s death, it was that he ended up getting closer with his family.

Not that he preferred having better relationships with them — he would have chosen his beloved over them any day.

On the first anniversary of her death he crumbled against their dinner table and tried to hold onto the table as he fell on his knees under the weight of his suppressed grief and agony. Damian could feel tears running down his face until he knew all he could do was to let it be, and so he sobbed.

“Oh god, why can’t you be here? I should have been the first of us to die, not— not you.”

He had trouble breathing and he could only take short, sharp breaths. All he needed was to be able to hold his wife, his beloved, but that was the only thing he would never be able to do anymore.

Later that night Drake — no, Timothy, because maybe he deserved that much for dealing with him that night without making fun of him even once — came over and just forced Damian to the sofa and gave him food he had bought before that. After that, he used Alfred’s recipe for an Irish coffee to calm him down a little.

Timothy let him set the pace — if Damian wanted to talk, he was allowed to and Timothy would sit there in silence, listening to him, unless it was clear he wanted Timothy’s thoughts on the matter, or they would both be quiet, and at some point Damian was rather sure they had watched a few movies without really sleeping. Eventually, the coffee had him rather tired and he fell asleep, leaning against Timothy’s shoulder.

Come the morning, and Timothy was still there. He even offered Damian rather sound advice, once he’d thought it over and realised Timothy was, in fact, right and didn’t deserve the blowing up he’d received from Damian.

“With the death of a loved one, you’ve got to let yourself grieve. Otherwise, you will not be able to get better. It’s just a sign there’s excess love inside you that you can’t give anyone because that bit of love was reserved for someone special. It’s… Well, it’s something you need to let yourself feel because otherwise it will make you come crashing down and you don’t want to collapse,” he told Damian after making him sit down and drink some water. It looked like Timothy hadn’t slept at all.

And he looked even worse than he usually did — he looked worse than Damian knew he himself had looked when Timothy had found him the day before.

“It’s unlikely you’ll ever be able to stop grieving, but… It will get better. One day. Slowly. And then sometimes it will hit you all over again, but on those days — well, every day, but especially on those days — I’m here. All of us, all of your family is. We won’t let you go through this alone. She was dear to us all, too.”

Later on (it must have taken some weeks, because by the time he heard it, Timothy had gone missing again) he heard from the rest of his family that it was amazing Timothy had come to him then. They still hadn’t gotten along well at that time (they’d gotten along on any level before his beloved’s death only for her sake as she’d expressed her utter sadness whenever they fought too much), but he’d come to help Damian specifically anyway. Because he cared.

And it turned out he’d been as much of a mess as Damian had, but he'd forced himself to get up and deal with Damian too. It had taken him a while to understand how Timothy could have been as bad as he had, but then it hit him — he and Marinette had been best friends, and losing her had been just as much of a tragedy to him as it had been to Damian.

That was something.

And it was certainly an act to be respected.

Fortunately, they found him within the next few months, alive, because even Damian had admitted he missed Timothy and he wouldn’t be able to take it if more of his family died. Losing Marinette had been enough.

On the fifth anniversary of her death, the entire family got together to remember her. Damian had baked her favourite pastries, fraisiers, for everyone. He had needed to do it — after all, it was her who taught him to bake them.

Every one of them loved them. The children — Grayson’s, Todd’s and Thomas’, though no one really knew where Thomas had gotten his (none of them questioned it because they were too used to Father’s antics, at least he wasn’t training them to be vigilantes) — were just happy they got to eat sweets, though the older ones did notice the sad presence in all of them. That, and there was no way they didn’t know they gathered together to keep the memory of Damian’s late wife alive. It was certain that Todd’s children all knew a lot about the happened and knew that Marinette Dupain-Cheng-Wayne had been close with all of them, but Damian wasn’t sure if they understood why everyone was like that.

He could only barely see it from the blurriness in his own vision, but there were tears in Richard’s eyes that he refused to shed. Timothy just smiled that sad smile of his at the dessert and looked like he was talking to himself, but there wasn’t even a trace of tears in his expression. He was doing better.

“It will get better,” he had told Damian years ago. “Not now, and the developement is going to be slow, but it will.”

Maybe that was what had Timothy smile.

Damian didn’t know whether he should be happy for him or bitter.

He decided to be happy for him, because that was what he knew his beloved would have wanted.

Years went by and yet Damian never forgot about her. He knew he could never. He was finally getting better, he could go about his everyday life easily, though sometimes he needed to take a day off when the grief surfaced and he couldn't handle it anymore.

Somehow, Timothy seemed to always know when those days hit (Damian wouldn’t put it past him to have all their siblings and even Father looking after him and reporting his moods to Timothy), and every single time he was there at some point, either offering a listening ear or something to watch or food or just his presence, even if both of them worked on their own projects in silence.

But he got better, and the pain and grief born from losing her loosened their grip on him.

Through all the years, Damian carried a picture of Marinette along with him. He made sure her legacy would stay alive in some way, and ended up founding the Marinette Foundation that technically offered help for young artists and those bullied in school. In reality, they helped anyone they could, because that was what Marinette would’ve done.

Jon and Colin told him he was nothing like the boy they knew at some point, that he had changed, and they were proud of him. They said Marinette would be proud of him too. Damian, in turn, told them that they could thank Marinette when they met her in the life after this one and themselves for showing him the way (and Marinette for getting tired of his antics and shoving him down and onto said way because he refused to step onto it himself.)

Even on his deathbed decades later, he held a picture of Marinette in his hands, refusing to forget her no matter what.

Because after all, she was the reason he was still there.

“It's the one person who knew you and accepted you…”

Damian swallowed — damnit, an al Ghul did not swallow when nervous or anxious, that was a sign of weakness and he wasn’t weak — as Marinette stared him down. He had to consciously keep himself from shifting in place where he was sitting on his bed. Marinette was on the other side of the room, leaning against the wall, her arms crossed over her chest.

The lights in the room were rather dim, the brightest light source being the daylight that made its way into the room through the windows Alfred had had them clean a few days earlier. Something about them needing to know how to do it and being able to be outside the window relatively safely compared to Alfred himself.

He didn’t dare to say a word after his confession, simply waiting for Marinette to speak up. For her to say something, anything. He’d told her everything he could remember, even things he had never told anyone else, and her opinion on it mattered so much, regardless of what he wanted to convince himself of. Her opinion always weighed more than others’ at this point.

Eventually, she opened her mouth. “Alright, so tell me if I got it right. You were born to the daughter of the leader of the league of Assassins, you were raised to become one, you actually killed tens and tens of people, then you were taken to your father at the age of ten to distract him from his work as Batman, tried to kill Tim — my best friend — multiple times, and you never told me until now? After we’ve known each other for seven years and having dated for four of them?”

Usually, Damian could read Marinette easily, but now her face was blank, and the only thing he could hear in her voice was a hint of exasperation and anger. A hint. That meant she was hiding something huge, because his beloved was never this emotionless unless she was actively hiding something from him.

And that was something that had him swallow his pride and admit to himself that he was frightened about what that meant for him, for her, for them and their relationship. He had no idea.

He nodded, drawing out a slow “yes, that’s pretty much it summarised.”

Marinette sighed and ran a hand down his face. For a second, there was a flash of absolute fury and sorrow visible on her face, but then it was already gone. Damian wasn’t sure what to make of it, but he was rather sure that this meant the end of their relationship.

“I am so furious right now.”

“I understand that you’re furious with me. I did hide it from you for a long time. I just thought you deserved to know, even if it came later rather than sooner. Better late than never, isn’t it?”

Yet another sigh. “Damian, love, mon cœur, I am not furious at you. I am furious at your mother and I am furious at your grandfather and so many others, but not you. And yes, I deserved to know that my boyfriend has killed people, multiple of them at that, but I can see why you hid it from me for so long. When was the last time you killed anyone?”

“A bit after I became Robin.”

“Well then, it’s long since that happened. I can’t promise I won’t be a little uncomfortable around you for a while, but I’ll work on it. Your mother and grandfather took your childhood away and it isn’t your fault you became an assassin — you didn’t know any better. You were a child. You aren’t supposed to have to know how to be at that age, especially if you’ve only ever seen one way of living, if you’ve only ever been told that way of living is the correct one. Instead, I’m ready to break this family’s “No kill” rule and go do that to your mother and grandfather. You didn’t deserve all of that. No child does.”

There were tears in his eyes that were threatening to spill, and Damian needed to think about breathing in order to be able to do so.

“I— What is wrong with you? Why do you care so much about me?!” he began with a broken voice, his tone borderline hysterical, but Marinette interrupted him by putting a finger on his lips. She’d crossed the room fast.

“Because you’re my friend above all else. You’re the one I love, and there’s nothing that can change that.”

Damian’s breath came to a halt. Tears burned in his eyes and suddenly he felt like a scared child, clinging onto anything that could save him. Marinette smiled at him so gently, so reassuringly as she reached out to him. She was truly an angel bringing light to his life, being the light in the darkness that was his life. “But I— I killed—”

“Oh love, I don’t blame you, so please, don’t do that either. Children cannot be blamed for the actions of their parents, and they can’t be held responsible for something they did because their mother and grandfather told them to do so. It took, what, ten years before you were even told you were allowed to not kill people. There’s no way I could ever blame you.” Marinette pulled rather limp Damian into her arms and squeezed him, and both of them tried to ignore the tears that were now flowing down from their eyes. Marinette hid her face in Damian’s hair, keeping Damian within her embrace in the way he’d once (surprisingly) admitted felt safe to him, his face buried in her shirt. Marinette said nothing about the tears staining the piece of clothing.

She never would, not with her dearest. Especially not when he was like this.

Marinette wasn’t surprised in the least that Damian had come crashing down like this. Keeping something a secret from your loved ones was tiring. The bigger the secret and the longer you kept it, the bigger the consequences would be once you let go of it.

All she could do now was to be there for him and prove that she wasn’t going to leave, even if it took her a long time. He deserved that much.

Because after all, he deserved the world.

“Believed in you before anyone else did…”

Marinette bend over and put her face in her arms and knees, sitting on her bed. Her sketchbook lied on the other side of the room, some of its pages crumbled next to it. She had no idea what to do. The only thing that could be heard in the room were her heavy breathing and sobs, at least until someone was at the door.

That someone knocked on the door three times, each knock the slightest bit different. She didn’t want to see anyone right now, but the knocks already told him it was either Damian or Tim on the other side of the door. They were the only two she’d told about how to knock on her door to make sure she knows it’s one of them if they needed to talk to her and she reacted to no other means of contact.

So, reluctantly, she stood up and walked to the door, opening it to reveal Damian standing there, wearing a worried expression on his face. Marinette stepped aside and motioned for him to come in before closing the door behind the two of them.

“What is—” she began but was interrupted before she got any further.

“What happened, habibti?”

Marinette snapped her mouth shut. This was not what she was expecting. Damian sounded worried.

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You don’t throw your sketchbook across the room and look like you’re about to cry when you are alright.”

That was enough to make her stop with the excuses. Damian had her figured out. She should have guessed. She swallowed, visibly deflated and dropped on the ground, hugging her knees. Damian was at her side within seconds.

“I just—” It was hard to talk about it and they fell into silence again. Damian put his hand on her shoulder hesitantly, as though he wasn’t sure if it was okay. As she didn’t move away or flinch at the touch, he just let it rest there. Marinette guessed he was trying his best at showing he was there by doing what he’d seen Tim and Dick do before.

“You can take your time, I am in no hurry,” he said, drawing a teary laugh out of her.

“Thanks, Dames.”

Marinette stared at the ground as she started speaking. “I— It’s just that I realised, I remembered that I didn’t want to be a designer, not to begin with. I do enjoy designing, it isn’t that, but… It’s kind of like video games. It was meant to be a hobby.”

“Why did you change your mind, then?”

“I think… I think it’s because of Mlle Bustier. She saw me designing clothes one day and she kept insisting I was good at it and telling me I should become a designer. I did tell her I didn’t want to, but she insisted I should become one for weeks, months, years. Eventually I— eventually I just thought that was what I wanted and should do, I guess.”

Damian growled, like, honest to god growled. “I am going to sue that disgusting, sorry excuse of a teacher,” he all but snarled, but didn’t go anywhere from where he was kneeling next to her.

“Please don’t. You don’t have any proof.”

“Tt. As you wish. At least she cannot do anything to you anymore as you’re now here. Then, what was it you wanted to do? Before that loathsome woman interfered, that is.”

Marinette smiled at him with teary eyes. “I wanted to be a baker, just like my parents. They loved their job and baking was so much fun. I loved trying new things and I always imagined how it would be to either take over our family bakery or start my own,” she said, chuckling. Then her smile disappeared from her face and she frowned a little. “But every time I mention this to someone now, they’re saying I shouldn’t abandon my “dream” of becoming a designer, that I don’t need to worry about whether I can make it. They think I’m just scared of whether my designs are good enough — I know they are — and I do want to do it as a side thing, but I… it’s not what I want from life. I want to be able to bake and make these amazing, wonderful creations and make people smile when they eat them!”

Damian reached his hands out to cup her face but hesitation made him jerk away. Why was he hesitating now? That was not something he usually did. But, when he watched her expressions carefully, the slightest bit of disappointment he could see on Marinette’s face had him reach out again and cup her face.

“Whatever it is you want to do, I support you, and I’m sure you’ll do great. If you want to be a baker and create a bakery, I say go for it. If it makes you happy, I want you to do it, and I’ll be there supporting you through every step of the way, if that pleases you.”

“Yes, it would. Thank you, Damian,” she said, and finally a smile graced her lips again. It was like it lit up the entire room, but Damian didn’t have long to think about it before Marinette had surged forwards and her lips were on his.

Just as soon as the kiss had started, it also ended. Marinette looked embarrassed and ashamed, letting her gaze fall to the side, averting Damian’s eyes. Her sudden movements had Damian lose his grasp on her.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. I simply—”

And then she was interrupted by Damian cupping her face once more, pulling her forwards and claiming her lips in turn. Marinette melted into it and traced her hands along his body up until they found their place on his shoulders and behind his neck. When they broke the kiss off, Marinette simply let herself go limp against Damian who held her like she was the most precious thing in the world.

Perhaps she was.

“I meant that. I will always be here for you because I love you,” he whispered into her hair.

After all, it wasn’t like he wouldn’t fight the entire world for her.

“...or when no one else would.”

“Have I ever told you how I met one of my best friends, Damian Wayne?” Lila asked one day after school when they were all waiting for their lifts or friends on the school grounds. Alya immediately perked up and looked at her friend curiously. She already seemed ready to take out her phone and record Lila talking about it, but Lila simply laughed sweetly and told her that she needed to protect Damian’s privacy from the media. Alya understood and put her phone away.

Marinette mostly ignored it, still waiting for her lift — she didn’t like it when Lila lied about her friends, but as long as she wasn’t slandering their name, she had decided not to intervene because one, it’s not like her classmates would care, and two, why should she care about her ex-friends being lied to if they didn’t believe her when she said so? As long as Lila didn’t bully her or her ex-friends didn’t do it, she couldn’t care less.

“Alright, so it went like this. A few years ago, I was at the Wayne gala with my mother, when this woman spilled her drink on my dress. It was so unfortunate, I had gotten the dress from Prince Ali the last time I’d met him, and it was my favourite one,” Lila explained, making an effort to put shock and sadness in her voice, her expressions no doubt matching the story perfectly. Rose gasped in horror. Marinette was half-listening to the story, ready to start recording in case there was going to be any slander against any of her friends. After all, she would need proof if they wanted to take it to court.

“Oh girl, what happened then? Did she at least apologise and offer to get it cleaned up for you?” Alya asked, grabbing Lila by the shoulders. Marinette could almost imagine her concerned, angry face in her mind.

Marinette could find a slightly bitter taste in her mouth at the nickname but ignored it.

Lila tilted her head and furrowed her brows, looking away for a second as though she were sad. “No,” she sighed. “She was jealous about me and the beautiful dress I had. Then she smirked at me and tripped, ripping my dress. It couldn’t be repaired afterwards. The biggest problem was, when she— when she ripped my dress—”

Lila swallowed and stopped speaking and wiped a tear away from her eye before continuing. “When she ripped my dress, it revealed my undergarments, right there, in the middle of the gala,” she whispered. Marinette would be amazed at her acting skills because she sounded just like she were embarrassed for a second there if it wasn’t for the fact she didn’t like it when people lied.

“What happened then?” Mylène asked, holding her breath.

“Then Damian swooped in and shed his jacket quickly, giving it to me to be able to cover myself. Then he took me away from the ball and got me one of his sister’s dresses. He apologised that it wasn’t the same thing, but told me it was too unfortunate the woman had been like that. He then reassured me that his family would take her away so I could enjoy the rest of the gala. He still let me keep the jacket because I was cold.”

The girls around her cooed.

“Tell us more!”

“Well, alright,” Lila complied, looking like she didn’t want them asking more. Like hell she didn’t, she reveled in their attention. Lila Rossi loved the sound of her own voice more than she loved breathing. “So, a few days after that — as I hadn’t been able to find him at the end of the gala to be able to give his jacket back to him — I was walking outside using his jacket because it was so warm and that way I could return it to him or one of his family members should I see them there. The a dog ran past me without his owner. He clearly belonged to someone because he had a collar and he was groomed, but I couldn’t even see anyone running after him. So, obviously, I ran after the dog to catch him, hoping he had a name tag and the owner’s information so I could return him. It took me a while and my feet were so tired, but eventually I succeeded. That was about when I saw a young man running towards me. The dog visibly brightened and started wagging his tail just as when I was trying to check the nametag, so I guessed it was the owner.”

“Who was it, then?”

“Ooh, was it Damian?”

“Yes! It was indeed Damian! His dog had run away! He was so kind to me because I found his dog and thanked me so many times for it. He asked me if I wanted to come for a walk with him and his dog who was so sweet the entire time. It was so wonderful talking with him — he’s a great conversationalist!” Marinette did agree with her there. “Then I gave him his jacket back and he gave me his number so we could keep in contact. We kept talking even after I returned to Italy and he’s one of my dearest friends!”

Well, Lila had said nothing problematic about Damian or any of the other Wayne family members, so Marinette decided she couldn’t bother to get involved in it. At least she’d done her research for once, because while there were things you could check on the internet, it would be much harder unless you knew exactly where to look and who to ask.

Marinette pulled out her phone to call Tim as he was supposed to fetch her from school with Alfred. Tim was her best friend and they were going to take her to the States for the next few weeks so she could get a break from school and all the stress surrounding it. Well. She was going to go to school with Damian in Gotham to make sure she didn’t fall behind, but it wasn’t like it was the schoolwork stressing her out. It was Lila and all her lies and the lack of anyone she could talk to or rely on. In Gotham, none of those things would be a problem.

But, instead of Tim walking up to her, she got Tim and Damian, both heading straight her way. Once she got over her surprise, she smiled brightly and waved at them before running towards Tim and hugging him. He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tightly.

“I’m so glad that you’re coming over for the next few weeks, Cupcake! There’s so much I want to show you. Did I already mention that Lucius and Tam are both looking forward to seeing you at the office during your stay? Because they totally are. They want to show you around the company. You can’t let them down. Bart and Kon mentioned wanting to see you at some point during the week too.”

Marinette laughed and wriggled out of Tim’s grasp. “I’ll make sure I’ll have time for all of them. I do need to set time aside for you especially, but I’m reserving Dames for myself for at least a few days,” she told the two boys and smiled at Damian. She still wasn’t too close with him so she tried to keep away from hugging him or tried to keep the touch contact at minimum because he always seemed so uncomfortable with the rest of the family showing their affection by hugs or ruffling his hair and so on. She didn’t want to do it to him.

(So what if a bit of it was because she had the tiniest crush on him and didn’t want to ruin her relationship with him before she even had any kind of a chance.)

“Oh, Marinette, who’s your friend? Your boyfriend? Or boyfriends?” Lila asked with the slightest smirk hidden behind her smile, the tone of her voice sounding the slightest bit scandalised at the idea of multiple boyfriends. It seemed everyone else caught it too and with wide eyes, stared at Marinette. Marinette scowled, hoping Tim and Damian didn’t catch the mood change in the air.

A pointless wish because both were children of Bruce Wayne and raised by the greatest detective in the world, but a wish nonetheless.

“This is my best friend, Tim, and this is his little brother and also my dear friend, Dames,” she replied, gritting her teeth a little.

“Oh no, your best friend? Isn’t Alya your best friend?”

That drew the attention of the entire class still present to them. They smelled drama and they wanted to see it.

“No,” Marinette said coolly, pressing her nails into the skin of her palm to keep herself calm and grounded. Tim seemed to notice it and put a hand on her arm, rubbing circles on it with his thumb. “Alya was my best friend until she decided to believe you over me. We grew apart.”

“God, Marinette, this ploy of yours isn’t going to work. You’re still my friend, but I’m also friends with Lila! I don’t get where this jealousy and need to have people for yourself is coming from! Are you still mad that Adrien doesn’t like you as much as he likes Lila?”

Marinette inhaled deep. “I don’t even like Adrien anymore. I haven’t liked him in months! I’m not jealous, it’s that you all keep believing and choosing Lila — a girl you’ve known for a year or so — over me, someone some of you have known since we were in diapers! Have I ever lied to any of you? Proved you couldn’t trust me? Anything that could justify any of this?”

She was so irritated and done with them. They weren’t bullying her, but honestly, she would have preferred it over them saying they were still friends before doing a complete 180° and deciding to choose Lila over her every. Single. Time. Not once had they chosen her over Lila since she came into the picture permanently.

“Like hell you don’t like Adrien. You just told me over the phone you do!”

“Alya, we haven’t spoken over the phone in ages.”

That stopped Alya. She swallowed, pulled out her phone and frantically looked through it before paling.

“Well?” Marinette inquired. She knew perfectly well it had been a long time since because both of them were just “so busy” all the time.

“It’s— it’s been half a year since…” Alya choked out. Marinette settled for an expression and an arch of a brow that told her I told you so.

“Well then, that’s settled. Can we go now? I’d like to see the rest of the family as soon as possible,” Marinette said, already turning on her heel when Lila decided she needed to have the last word in. At least she had the good idea of speaking in French because every time Marinette spoke to the two boys, it was in English. Obviously, both of them knew at least some French as she used it around the Manor and they sometimes replied to her, but still. It wasn’t like Lila knew.

“Where are you even going? It’s the middle of the school year. There can’t be any good reason as to why you’re leaving now. It’s not like you’re good enough to just not be here.”

“I am leaving because of stress, not that it actually was any of your concern, and my schoolwork is doing just fine, thank you very much.”

“I haven’t even seen you study, you’re quiet in class — in fact, it seems like all you do is draw while you should focus on what Mlle Bustier is teaching us.”

Marinette sighed. She didn’t want to have to deal with this.

The others in class spoke up too, all of them spouting out similar “facts” that actually weren’t true. Marinette could feel tears burning in her eyes and the choking feeling in her throat was just too present, but she couldn’t do anything about it. Tim looked ready to go full Red Robin on them, but just before he opened his mouth, Damian was already in front of them and at it. Tim returned to Marinette’s side, rubbing comforting circles on her shoulders and arms, wiping her tears away.

“I’m not certain if any of you imbeciles have ears. She told you, her schoolwork is excellent. I have seen her grades, Father has seen her grades, her parents have seen her grades, Drake has seen them, and all of us have decided that it is of no problem for her to come with us. And if any of you were the friends you say you are, then you would not question this and be happy for her and trust she knows what she is doing. If none of you are able to do that simple thing, then I deem all of you unworthy of her,” he said, in perfect French, his tone of voice clearly telling them all his word was final. Some of the students paled and backed off when they caught it and understood there was no way for them out of this.

It seemed Lila didn’t.

“Who are you supposed to be? I’ll have you know, I’m the daughter of an ambassador, you can’t speak to me like that.”

“Oh, so you are the liar Malaki has mentioned every now and then.”

“Are you calling me a liar?”

“Well, to say what Jason would love to if he were here, I ain’t calling you a truther,” Tim chimed in, a smile on his face, though none of the others could see it as he was still focused on making sure Marinette was okay. Marinette’s snort mixed with her choked sob as she held onto Tim, watching the exchange take place in front of them.

Marinette could have cried out of joy. Her friends — these friends — were actually there for her and didn’t let her deal with all of it alone. And Damian, well. He believed in her. He didn’t doubt her words for a second about a liar and then the moment he met Lila, he stood with Marinette and didn’t let Lila’s sweet, sugary, false words change his mind.

It mattered more to her than she knew how to explain.

The glare he had on his face, directed at Lila and the rest of them, was definitely the perfect blend of Damian al Ghul Wayne and Robin. It was something all the Bats learnt from Bruce and Batman, but Damian had perfected it and turned it into something of his own. Marinette was glad she was never on the receiving end of it. The faintest ghost of a smile crept on her lips as she watched everything unravel in front of her very eyes.

“Wait. Aren’t you— Lila, do you not recognise him?”

That was Alya.

“Why should I?”

Lila.

“Because that right there is Damian Wayne and you were just telling us about how you met him.”

“According to the internet and my various sources, the two people with Marinette Dupain-Cheng are Damian Wayne and Timothy Drake-Wayne.”

Max and Markov.

“I can’t believe this is how you fall, Rossi. You don’t recognise your so called best friend? You definitely dug yourself into a deep hole. It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous.”

And Chloé.

That was all the rest of them needed to pull out their phones and start looking up the rest of the things — thoroughly — that Lila had claimed to be true. It didn’t take too long before Markov and Max started listing off things Lila had lied about.

Damian smirked and turned away, clearly satisfied with how things turned out. He led Marinette to the car with Tim, and once they were inside and had said hi to Alfred and apologised for how long it took, he turned to Marinette and actually, genuinely smiled at her.

“Remember, Malaki, you don’t need to do everything on your own. If anyone ever dares to disrespect you like that again or doesn’t believe you when you’re telling the truth, you can trust that I will be there if you need assistance. I will always be there when you need me. Asking for assistance isn’t a sign of weakness.  Besides, isn’t that what Grayson always tries to remind us all of? That ‘asking for help and helping is what family does’, that ‘admitting to your flaws or not being able to do everything alone doesn’t mean a lack of strength’.”

“I agree with him, for once. We all care about you and you’re family. You could never be a bother. You can rely on us.”

Marinette wiped a tear out of her eye and smiled back. “You’re right. Thank you, Dami. For everything. You too, Timmers.” She grabbed the hands of both her friends and squeezed them, completely ignoring the warmth on her cheeks as Damian gave her a light squeeze back.

She would be fine.

Because after all, he wasn’t about to leave her fending for herself.

“And no matter what happens...”

“I’ll go with you.”

Marinette’s tone indicated her words were meant to be taken as final, but Damian wasn’t having it. He was not about to let his wife come with him to take down the League of Assassins for good because it wasn’t safe at all. That was the one fight where he wouldn’t be able to protect her because he’d be too caught up with fighting those who had gotten training nearly as good and tough as his. His beloved, as good as she was, was not comparable to the League because her training had been so different. His mother would be there, no doubt. Even if she liked Marinette, Mother was not above using her son’s wife against him if she thought it would work in her favour.

“No. You aren’t coming. I don’t want you to die there.”

Marinette groaned and threw a pillow at him with way too much force. It didn’t hurt — it was a pillow, after all—, but it did surprise him.

“Damian, ma raison de vivre, I will come with you. There’s no way I’ll be able to go on if you’re gone, so I will come and make sure you don’t die,” she snapped at him, scowling. It was a rare thing to see on her face.

“You are the one who needs to live if it comes down to that. The world and the family needs you more than they need me, habibti. I—” He was interrupted before he got any further.

“No! Don’t you dare start that! You are my — ugh, what’s the English term… whatever, let’s go with French — ma raison d’être and there’s no way I’m letting you die either! You aren’t disposable, you aren’t someone that I — or the family — can lose! I don’t care what it takes, and if I have to follow you from the shadows, hidden from you, to be able to come along, then that’s what I will do,” Marinette said, snarling.

“But this is the League of Assassins, they are there to kill. I might have to resort to that as well, if nothing else works. I will try not to for you, of course, but the chance still exists. They will definitely try to kill me, and if you’re there, you as well.”

“You know what, I’m coming and I’m telling the family of this as well. They won’t let you go alone either. None of us want you to die.”

She had already pulled out her phone and dialed someone by the time Damian had noticed and tried to stop her. It was too late.

“Fine,” he huffed and sat down at the table, watching as Marinette argued with someone on the phone until she finally put her phone away with a smug smile on her face.

“Tim said he’s coming, I reminded Bruce that he wouldn’t want to lose yet another son — especially not for the second time, yes, I know you died like fifteen years ago — so he’s in as well, Dick was in before I even finished trying to convince him, and Jason is coming as well because he cares about you all and wants to be there to protect you even if he’s horrible at saying it out loud.”

“I know.”

“Cass, Steph, Duke and Babs are in as well. So, you know, the whole family is going to be there. I’m pretty sure Jon and Colin would want to help as well if I asked.”

Marinette walked around the table to him, and slid her arms around him. “Dames, whatever happens, I will be there by your side, just like you told you’d be by my side. It goes both ways, love.” She pressed a kiss to his hair and took his hands in her own. “We are going to be fine, I promise. After all, you’re my other half, you complete me, and that means we’re going to survive and get through this as well.”

The day to fight came, and all the kwamii were tired, so Marinette wore kevlar, just like the rest of them. She smiled at him, holding his hand and chuckled, saying they matched. Damian smiled back and tucked some loose strands behind her ear. Yeah, just like his beloved said, they were going to be alright.

Because after all, they worked together better than any oiled machine.

“You will always love them.”

Those were the words he told her in front of both their families, their friends, but Damian couldn’t care less about them. All that mattered to him was that his angel was there, his angel had promised to give all of herself to him for the rest of their lives, until death do them part. In return, he gave her all that he was, all that he had, and he would never leave her side if it was up to him to decide.

He took her hands in his before bringing them up to kiss her fingers. Marinette laughed, the sound of it like music in his ears. It was the most beautiful sound in the world to him. The red of her dress was elegant and brought out her appearance’s best qualities, it made her eyes shine. The golden accents

When the “You may kiss the bride” came, he lifted her up by her waist, twirled them around and placed her back on the ground before he pressed a delicate kiss on her lips. It made her smile, and Damian was certain she could compete with the Sun itself for the place of the brightest and most beautiful thing in the world and win.

When they finally turned to face their closest people present, they were both smiling and happier than ever. Grayson cheered in the front row, Todd had a grin on his face, Father was smiling at them with such pride in his eyes, and Drake… Oh yeah, he was Marinette’s Man of Honor, so he wasn’t with the rest of the family — he had been standing at the side on Marinette’s side, with Brown, Tsurugi and Cain, who were her bridesmaids, and Couffaine, her bridesman, all standing behind him. Damian had given Colin and Jon the honour of being his Best Men (because he simply refused to choose only one of them.) Right now, Drake looked ready to run to Marinette and hug and congratulate her, but decided against it because he knew it was her and Damian’s day, and the right to be there by her side at the ceremony was Damian’s.

(It was clear he was going to spend as much time as possible with her at the wedding reception, though. Damian had no problem with that — his wife should be able to be with her friends, especially her best friend, as long as she didn’t forget him. He knew she wouldn’t. There was a reason she’d married him.)

Marinette smiled at him and gave his cheek a quick peck as they intertwined their fingers and walked down the aisle. It was strange and oh so wonderful how this amazing young woman had decided she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, no matter what kind of a person he had been, no matter how many other suitable people that liked her were there, no matter how difficult life together would be because of how stubborn both of them were — she still had chosen him over everyone and everything else, and Damian would be damned if he didn’t treat her with all the respect she deserved and make her as happy as ever possible.

Because after all, if soulmates existed, she was definitely his.

“Nothing can ever change that.”

A woman perks up as she hears someone call her name, seeing the black hair and the tan skin of the one she’s always loved. The one she’s loved since the day she saw him and until the day her heartbeats ceased and even beyond death. The one she had loved, the one she still loves, the one she will always love. He’s standing there, shocked, tears in his eyes, but there’s so much adoration and love in his eyes that she doesn't even know how to react. Then she rushes to her feet and runs to him, throwing herself at him because it’s been too long since the day we lost each other.

Her treasure got to live a life decades longer than her own, he got to grow old, but she can’t find it in herself to be bitter about it — he always deserved to live a long life, and besides, even though she would have tried to be happy for him if it had happened, he never fell in love again or remarried after she was taken away from him. He’d stayed hers and hers only until death, and now they’re back together, finally. Even if it took nearly seven entire decades of separation first.

Basking in the warmth of sunlight, the young woman with black hair leans against the young man just about her age, his hair just as black as hers. He wraps his arms around her shoulders tightly and presses her against his chest, more than grateful he can hold her again after being separated for so very long. She chuckles and tilts her head backwards so he can give her a kiss on her forehead more easily.

The rest of the world no longer matters. It’s no longer “as though it doesn’t matter”, because now it is “it doesn’t matter”. They have both lived and they have both died, and now that they’re together again, they don’t need to care about the world. It isn’t like they can affect it anymore either.

They intertwine their fingers, a gesture that brings both of them comfort, a gesture that has brought both of them comfort for decades now, and they watch the sun set down below in the world they can only see as outsiders anymore. Even so, the sunset paints the world in warm tones, and the peaceful tones of red, orange and yellow fill their vision.

Their time is no longer limited, for they’ve found one another in the life beyond. They are together again, and that is all that matters to them. Their family is there as well, all of them are waiting to see them, and that’s why they don’t need to worry anymore.

The young woman stands up and offers her hand to the man, and the man takes it, letting the woman pull him to his feet. She cups his face and pulls him down to a kiss, smiling into it as she murmurs her confessions of love to him in all the languages she knows and even the languages she doesn’t. In return, he tells her how she is all that he needs, how she changed his life, and how he will keep his promise of staying by her side until the end of time in all the languages that have ever existed and even the languages that don’t yet exist.

After all,  to one another, the two of them were everything.

Because what’s a soulmate, if not the one person you love more than anything, the one person your life would crash without, the one person that gives you strength in the darkest of times even when they aren’t there, if not the one you choose to love until you run out of air to breathe and until your heart ceases to beat?

What’s a soulmate, if not the one who will keep coming back to you over and over again, no matter what happens, until the end of time and will find you even beyond death?

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@kris-pines04 @thethirdwheelfriend @daminett4life

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Did you find the only two connected scenes in this one because there's totally one scene that leads straight to another (and as the fic isn't in chronological order, the two scenes aren't either, it’s easy but not that easy.)

If you guess what were my favourite scenes to write or tell me what were yours to read, I'll give you a cookie.