#PMS Anon

[baby-tini]

YOU WRITE BSD CHARS SO ACCURATELY DUDEEEE ive been dying to read smth non fucking fanon but nsfw w dazai mostly HELP and i found ur account and bro ure a life saviour istg.

I love ur writings more than i love myself istg

WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE IF U WROTE THINGS DAZAI WOULD SAY IN BED :3 like ?? I feel like this man would praise u sooo much while doing the most unholy shit to you,, but i also feel like he wouldn't exactly degrade you but hed deffo mock u..

HES SO UGH I NEED HIM MORE THAN ANYONE DAZAI HMU ㅜㅜ

Aww, thank you so much, that is the biggest compliment because Dazai is so hard too figure out and even harder too write for!!!

TW- Implied Gun-play with PM!Dazai

ADA!Dazai-

-"Put your tongue back in your mouth before I stick something else in it."

-"You're so whiney baby... you gonna tell me what you want in full sentences or are you just gonna keep babbling?"

-"You're too pretty too be covering your face pretty girl.. move your hands for me."

-"Make a mess and I'm gonna make you lick it up, so it'd be best if you controlled that pretty little pussy of mine, yeah?"

-"Such a little minx you are, love. Touching me like that while I'm sleeping.. you're so needy."

PM!Dazai-

-"I thought you said you could take it.. oh, you can? So why are you crying, hm?... Get your face out of the pillow and answer me."

-"You take my cock so well... you think you could take it just the same if it was my gun fucking you instead?... mmm, actually I think you could take my gun even better."

-"You're so fucking loud, do I need too shut you up?... don't look at me like that, it certainly wouldn't be with my cock, you haven't even gotten close too earning that."

-"Being fucked is a reward, given your behavior recently, that shouldn't even be on your mind."

-"Coming untouched, huh? That's quite pathetic, even for you."

Beast!Dazai-

-"My pretty girl... so polite. Saying thank you when I let you cum, I taught you well, huh?"

-"Ah ah. Don't. That's not yours too touch."

-"Watch your mouth or don't speak. You don't get too cry about not cuming knowing the way you've acted today. You're lucky I'm fucking you at all."

-"Slow love, undress slower for me, I'm not going anywhere, I'd like too enjoy it, can you give me that baby?"

-"I said I'd make you cum when I got home, what? You thought just because you were sleeping that I wouldn't follow through? You wound me love."

[volumniafox]

Since the only way our fresh government managed to get rid of a literal nazi as a minister was when foreign press started taking notice... It would be a shame if some recent developments gained international attention :-)

[naughtie--angel]

No, my bf didnt cheat on me! He was just helping some girl create content for OF. That's not cheating, it's working, it's professional. Yes, countless people are going to see him fucking and cumming for other girl but like....it doesnt count as cheating. 😣

[kaeyx]

UGHhh, Thinking about disgusting possessive Dazai who does daily hole checks. Everytime you wake up, he has your legs thrown around his shoulders holding your pussylips/asshole open as he checks you. He might even go as far as to dip a couple fingers in to make sure you're still stuffed from last night's... activities. Hole checks are also done as soon as you get home from college/work/hobbies just to make sure no one else touched you. He'll call or text you daily to send him a picture of your little hole/s to make sure it looks just how he left it. Full of his cum. IF (and you better hope there aren't) he finds or sees something out of place or not to his liking... you're fucked. He'll check your little hole/s and if it's not as wet OR even wetter than before you left? He's tying down your hands and legs and mafia style interrogating you, holding a loaded gun to your head, going through your phone (location, calls, texts ect) going through your bag and even sniffling your panties to see if he "smells a difference." If his cum is no longer inside you, cause obviously it's gonna drip out 🙄 he's gonna assume you cleaned yourself for another cock to pump you full. (Hate him so bad but I also NEED him so bad 😩)

-💋 (I could see this for ADA PM BEAST, Chuuya, Fyodor and Nikolai tbh. Chuuya not as much though he's not crazy like the others, possessive? Yes. Crazy? A little. But not Dazai crazy.)

Agkakfskxna wetness checks and hole inspections are so HOT and he's so gross he makes me ill oughfhfhg /pos

In exchange for letting you leave the house you have to promise you'll send Beastzai pictures whenever he asks, so he can keep an eye on you. He wakes you up every morning with your legs around his hips, cockhead pressed up to your cervix as he floods you with cum. He kisses you and maybe slides a plug into you if he's feeling generous, if not you have to somehow manage to keep all that mess inside you for the whole day. During the day you can do whatever you want, he's going to keep an eye on you anyway. Apart from sending a few of his people to shadow you, I think he's the type to put a tracker on your phone or you, sewing it into your favourite jacket or in a piece of jewellery you always wear.

Even when he knows where you are at all times, Beastzai loves checking in on you at random times. If you're in class or at work, you have to excuse yourself to the bathroom and send him a picture of your messy hole, dripping his cum. Sometimes he tells you to finger it back in, with video proof of course. If he doesn't think you're wet enough, you have to edge a few times to keep your head fuzzy, so you can focus on what's actually important. Beastzai wants you to be a desperate, throbbing mess, thinking with your cunt, soaking through your clothes.

If he doesn't think that's enough he'll call you to the PM hq during the day, only to fill you up again. Sometimes he has time to fuck you properly, but sometimes he just sits back in his chair while you do the work, cruelly pinching your clit if he thinks you're enjoying yourself too much. This isn't about your orgasm, it's about keeping you full, it's about breeding you so you don't forget who you belong to. If he's feeling particularly cruel he won't even penetrate you, jerking off over you while he watches your pussy drool and clench on nothing, only to push inside with one stroke and empty his balls as deep as he can into your cunt. If you're not loose and wet enough to take him, that's too bad. You know it's your job to be always ready for use. He even rubs the sticky, messy tip of his cock against your clit right before he puts all your clothes back on, just to be mean.

[achillean-knight]

Desperately need Michael angst. Pretty pleaseeeeee?

The Bite of 87

[apollos-boyfriend]

you’re in the latest pm seymour video

let’s be real. this was inevitable. i’m at least glad he sniped me during my fagtainsparklez era

[stuffeddeer]

i came across your blog a few days ago and all i could think of is deerlike/fawnlike darling 😭 someone who’s sensitive and shy, a bit vulnerable !! would go so well with any of the dazais omg

YOURE SO RIGHT imma delve into a few different variations :)

Deludedly obsessed Dazai would view your deer-like traits as something inherently weak. It’s something that makes you sensitive and ill-equipped for the cruel world he grew up in. Since he’s well versed in the cruelties of life, Dazai can make sure you stay safe, right? He takes it up as his job to look after you and keep you safe, remaining close at all times when he can be. If you work in the agency alongside him, he makes sure to pull you onto missions that he’s already leading or will pawn off whatever he’s working on to join yours. He works at the agency, sure, but his job is to look after you. If you find him scary, that's merely because of how many people must have been able to wrong you in the past! It's not like it's hard to, in fact, he could easily— no.

That's why he needs to protect you, to keep you away from people like himself. Oda would want him to help out the poor and defenseless, right? Even if you can't accept that yet, you'll understand in a matter of time. Or you won't, and Dazai will have to take more... drastic measures.

-

Dazai who knows his obsession for you is wrong will start out thinking similar things — how easy you would be to manipulate (he hates that that’s his first thought), how much he should make sure to keep you safeguarded and out of harm’s way — but try to put a stop to it. If you work in an office job or something similar, he’ll be sure to remind himself that you’ve made it this far, and it’s not like you’ll be stumbling into trouble any time soon. To keep his mind from unraveling and his obsession and anxieties from worsening, he’ll follow you home after work under the blanketed night sky, reminding himself the whole time that you’re safe. And if anyone tries to harm you? …

He’d have such an urge to just keep you at his home, safe and away from the cruel outside, but he knows that’s wrong; Dazai knows how sad you’d be and while you’d have no way to fight back, he’d feel so guilty watching you break down in front of him. Looking after you is all he wants to do, including emotionally. But maybe feeling a little sad at the beginning is better than someone hurting you…

As much as he tries to fight it, Dazai knows you’d be better off staying by him all the time.

-

Manipulative and harsh Dazai who gets some sick joy out of your timid demeanor. He’ll want to crush your spirit, prove that your invulnerability is nothing more than a weakness he intends to exploit. You work in some sort of cozy shop mainly by yourself (ie coffeehouse, flower shop, something cutesy) and it almost makes him sick - how can someone be so sweet and innocent? He wants that for himself and you make it far too easy to obtain. A few kind words and polite smiles and he knows he’s become your favorite customer, even if he never buys anything. He brings you a coffee one day out of the goodness of his heart and Dazai swears he sees hearts in your eyes. He builds up a rapport so quickly and smoothly you don’t notice the red flags (how he always seems to know your schedule, favorite coffee..) and dismiss your co-worker’s worries. There’s no way he could be so rude and flippant with them, it’s not in his nature!

And when you get fired after some anonymous customer continuously claimed you were horribly rude to them, Dazai was there to console you. You find yourself at his place much more often, spending time solely with him as your friends begin to ghost you. As thanks to the man who kept you afloat during all of this, you’d stay and help around Dazai’s apartment, cleaning up and bringing him food… and when he mentioned how lonely it gets, well, what kind of friend would you be if you didn’t stay the night? And the next one. And the next…

Once you’ve all but entirely been kidnapped moved in, Dazai reminds himself that the world out there is cruel. So, if you miss being outside so much, then he’ll gladly bring the harsh world to you.

-

Possessive loser Dazai who doesn’t want your vulnerability and (as he views it) “pureness” tainted by someone else, but is happy just watching you stumble from afar. He swoops in during your date with a friend, dragging you out claiming that they were planning on hurting you! He just wants to keep you safe, don’t you understand that? And you do. You so pliantly nod as you thank him, letting out a sigh of relief that Dazai saved you yet again. How do you keep picking these horrible people?

One night, last minute, you went out with a few friends, and Dazai found out the next day. He spent all day avoiding you, angry beyond belief that you could be so stupid! Don’t you know they’re all the same?! He’s just trying to keep you safe! You’re so sensitive, so malleable; the last thing he wants is for some assholes to make you do something you don’t want to (never mind you saying you had fun). You apologize profusely, because of course you do: Dazai is your best friend.

-

Port Mafia Dazai whose only basis for relationships comes from Mori and his ability. He knows it’s wrong, right? But when he sees you, so shy and easy to scare, his mind is made up: You are too good for the Mafia. He takes you back to his small shipping container and decides he’d be the one to take care of you, like Mori does with Elise. His paychecks begin to go towards frilly outfits and soft pajamas for his darling, expensive cakes he wants to see you try and the same kind of crayons he saw Elise forcing the Boss to buy a few days ago. You’re well pampered and still so shy and polite, which is why Dazai is so aggravated when you finally ask to feel the sun on your skin once more. He’s sacrificed so much to keep you happy and spoiled, but you still ask for more?…

…He buys you a big house away from Yokohama’s port with big glass walls for you to enjoy the sun.

-

I imagine a more work-oriented or apathetic Port Mafia Dazai would be the only rendition that doesn’t treat you like a frail doll. Your vulnerable and shy side is cute, sure, but that can be a skill. He’d send you on missions to lure and attack like Kyouka or undercover, as no one expects such a shy person to be apart of the feared organization. He would spend his time training and mentoring you like Akutagawa, but he wouldn’t be nearly as harsh. You don’t have the ability and skills Akutagawa does, but you still should know basic self defense. Who knows? Maybe one day he’ll wrap you up in bandages and train you to follow in his footsteps.

[passing-moments]

Hi Shimmerpaw! Do you like your mentor, or do you guys clash?

(you'd be surprised to learn that despite these two having the complete opposite personality types, they actually get along pretty well)

[nebulousmedic]

Sniper in your latest drawing; “I should hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me”

Narrator voice: “it did”

Xx

I think ALL the mercs are into some freaky stuff and their pain tolerance is probably insane so COUGH

Whether they've discovered what they're into varies.... 👁️👁️

[front-facing-pokemon]

[baby-tini]

friendly reminder that PM!Dazai would most definitely fuck your throat loose with his gun before before he shoves his cock in it~

Now you're speaking my language anon, gun-play is.. *chefs kiss*

TW- Gun-play, Blood mentioned, Oral insertion with a gun.

He most definitely does though, it's part of your training, if you can't take his gun, what makes you think you can take his cock? Plus, you look absolutely divine down on your knees as he slips the muzzle over your lips before tapping it against them and watching as you let your soft tongue slip out as he rubs the opening of his gun on your tongue as if it was his cock. His head tilted down, looking at you with a fucked grin as he mocks you, you're really letting him slip the same gun that he's used too kill people, down your throat as he fucks it open? How much utterly pathetic can you possibly get? He's not sure, but he's of so eager too find out as he watches drool run down your chin, the spit slipping inside the gun as he makes you choke on it. The sharp edges of the pistol cutting at the corner of your lips as he makes you deep throat it until the trigger guard is resting on your bottom lip, holding it there as your pretty eyes get all wet... he wonders if your cunt is crying just as pretty as he rams his gun down your throat. The soft gagging noises has his pants tightening as he undoes his belt one-handed. Tugging it off as pulls the zipper down and finally pulls the gun from your mouth, the cuts on your lips leaking a pretty crimson as he rubs the head of his weeping cock over them, crimson leaking all over his pretty skin as he makes you suck it off his cock and take it down your throat just like you did with his cock.

[skeletoninthemelonland]

So, Graveleaper, he tries to set souls to rest How would he feel about or deal with vengeful spirits like Cassidy who refuse him like they did Old Man Consequences?

You could say it's part of Graveleaper's job to ensure that these spirits will never leave the limbo they're found in.

Some spirits decide not to go, so they can watch over a loved one. Other spirits are simply too afraid of entering this state of "non-existence". Then there are those angry spirits that refuse to die.

If a vengeful spirit isn't ready to move on, Graveleaper can't do much but wait for them to decide on themselves, even if it takes years until that happens. He can try and talk to them, but never actively intervene.

Some spirits learn to circumvent the rules and manifest into the world of the living, a.k.a. possession.

[kaeyx]

pmzai,, oughhh,,

he would get extremely attached to you, to the point he can’t go to sleep unless he’s being held by you. cuddles up to you mumbling incoherent sentences about how he’s your disgusting whore, smiling sleepily the entire time.

-pmzai anon

Godddd i swear you people make me worse every single day!!!

If you played your cards right he definitely would, you're always so sweet to him and he's never known anything like it. He'd say or do anything to keep you around for just a little longer, would hang off your arm and follow you around like a lost puppy, and if you tried to get him to leave you alone he'd look like you slapped him, big sad eye already full of tears before he turns around and stomps off to sulk, yelling that he was only hanging around for your protection but if you want to die then fine by him! Aaaaand five minutes later he'd be sniffling in a corner, already missing you.

Pmzai would be delighted if he got to sleep next to you, even offering his body up sometimes in hopes that you'll cuddle him to sleep afterwards. Plus wherever you live has to be way better than his storage container, so especially in winter he'd be tugging at your sleeve and pulling you in for kisses, maybe stealing your clothes, trying to get you to scoop him up and carry him off to your own bed. Moaning and crying when you fuck him ass up face down, cum spurting weakly onto the sheets as he chants over and over that he's yours, your whore, your perfect slut. Shameless about it too, he'd happily repeat back anything you tell him to say, even if it makes him sound pathetic. Ooooh maybe he'd like body writing, you leaving a demeaning message scrawled across his tummy before he gets dressed for work. And of course he'd want to be edged first thing in the morning, or have you cum in him. Anything that keeps his head fuzzy and coming back to you all day.

[timetravellingkitty]

To ja Phir, khud desh chala le, you are so dumb and so stupid, sure bjp has made mistakes but it has done a far better job than Congress, the way they handled the situation in kashmir was fucking awesome, they handled the manipur situation poorly, i admit. But again, far far better than Congress or any other party would.

I would actually be running this country if I could you're just fueling my ego atp anyways if you think land encroachment, jailing journalists, seizing kashmiri homes by employing bulldozer raj, forcibly closing masjids and torturing kashmiri civilians is a fucking awesome way of handling kashmir then idk what to tell you

[baronessblixen]

gillovny reunion!!! i think we all could use sweet news like this one ✨

Yes!! I mean we might not get a picture of them. We probably won't. But it sounds like they will for sure meet up and that alone makes me happy.

[stuffeddeer]

yk sometimes pm!dazai or ada!dazai takes off his trench coat and he only has his button up and waistcoat on? (its giving slay ngl) so maybe if he had a partner he’d occasionally lend his darling his coat because it’s cute and vv silly…

his coat pocket would have the weirdest things too: a crumpled page of the suicide book, a piece of bandaged that has yellowed due to oxidization, dog food etc

in my head im like how Dare he tarnish his beloved suicide book but that mf probably has 12 more copies at home lmao

I feel like instead of dog food he'd keep cat food for the street kitties that wander up to him :( he'd give them little pets and laugh so softly and sincerely as their heads bury into his coat pockets!!! He's all "You must've smelled the treats, hm? It's a good thing I keep them on hand for smart kitties like you," as he gently pushes them away so he can dig his hand in there to feed them rrgggg

PM!Dazai was shocked to see you shivering beside him. He was usually the one to get cold before you, and yet he found himself practically overheating in his black coat as he pulled it off his shoulders - at least that’s what he told you. Practically turning blue, you weren’t in any position to decline as he plopped it on your shoulders.

You immediately stuffed your hands in the pockets, trying to warm up your frozen fingers so they could move again. After a moment, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you turned slowly to look at the brunet.

“Dazai…”

“Yes, love?” He sends you a large grin, a teasing lilt in his tone.

You deadpanned, clearly unamused. “Your cold ass hand is not helping.”

His fingers intertwined with yours, his grin only growing as he pressed a kiss to your cheek. “I’ll take my coat back if you’re gonna be ungrateful,” he stuck his tongue out.

You smirked before pulling Dazai in close, wrapping the coat around him as well by wrapping your arms around him. “I’d never be ungrateful to my lovely Dazai! C’mon, I’ll keep you warm, too.”

“But I’m not cold— “

“I felt your freezing hand, Dazai; You aren’t fooling me.”

ADA!Dazai doesn’t need a reason to give you his coat. You look cute, and he wants to help you look cuter. Reason enough, right?

The two of you were lounging around working at the agency, with you focused on the report Kunikida had politely asked you to take care of. Dazai had been on the opposite side of the room at his own desk, coat draped behind him on his chair as he stared at you. His face was resting in the palms of his hand, leaning forward on his desk to get a better look at you.

Wow…

The way the setting sun came in from the window to light up your face had Dazai perfectly silent, mesmerized by you and your beauty. A loud sneeze came from you, whole face scrunching up as your elbow covered your nose briefly. Your sincere apology before immediately going back to your work had Dazai holding back coos, just wanting to hold you close and dote on you in the moment. He stood up, heading over to your side of the room and standing behind you. His coat was draped over his arm, the fabric rubbing against you he leaned down to press a kiss to the crown of your head.

“You must be getting a cold, hm?” He draped his beige trench coat over your shoulders, pulling your arms away from the report and stuffing them through the sleeves.

The action had you laughing, caught off guard as he pretty much dressed you in his coat. “You alright, Dazai?”

“Mhm, just wanted to keep you warm as your thoughtful boyfriend.” He leaned his body onto you, arms draped around your shoulders and chin digging into your head.

“Wow, you’re so sweet,” you replied sarcastically. Of course you knew he just wanted to see you wearing his oversized coat. “What would I do without you?”

Your hands slipped into the big pockets, letting out a soft chuckle as you pulled out crumpled up papers. “Do you keep these on hand?” You ask teasingly, reading the many ways to die as you flattened out the pages. In the margins were notes he must’ve scribbled down, many of which are just your name with little hearts scratched around them.

Dazai quickly snatched the pages from you, shoving them in the pockets of his white pants instead. “That’s nothing you need to worry about, love.”