#SOME OF THESE ANSWERS FEEL REDUNDANT I'M SORRY

[transvampireboyfriend]

@steddie-week Day 1: Secret relationship

Rating: M Words: 2362

Modern AU

"I'm gonna get us some more popcorn" Steve says, slapping his hands against his thighs.

Eddie gives him side eye because it's only been ten minutes since the movie started and they're supposed to be discrete.

Steve silently shrugs at him, raising his eyebrows and pointedly looking at everyone in the room.

He's right, no one even reacted to Steve's statement. Jon and Argyle are absentmindedly playing with each other's hands, eyes locked on the screen; Chrissy and Robin are still whispering to each other; Jeff is still showing something to Freak and Nancy on his phone and Gareth is still dozing on and off next to Chrissy.

Okay then, Eddie thinks, and tries to communicate the same to Steve with a shrug of his own.

Steve smiles a small thing, and winks at him.

A blink and you'll miss it wink, but Eddie still has to bite the inside of his cheek to tame his answering smile and try to subdue the heat rising to his cheeks.

7:05 his watch reads when Steve leaves the room.

Five minutes should be fine right? For Eddie to follow without making their friends suspicious?

Eddie looks at the TV and tries to focus on the movie, but all he can see are colors.

He doesn't know what they're watching, was too distracted by the hair on Steve's arm when they discussed it.

The hair on Steve's arm, which Eddie only discovered yesterday, is so soft and fun to kiss.

And lick.

And mouth at.

Jesus, it's been a whole month since their first date, a little more than that since they first kissed and Eddie still acts like a lovesick fool.

7:06

Eddie starts bouncing his leg impatiently.

On second thought, popcorn takes like two minutes to be ready. And say it takes Steve an additional minute to put it into a bowl, then he'll be back in less than five!

Eddie's wasting precious time!

He stands abruptly and everyone does turn to look at him at that.

"Sorry," he smiles sheepishly, "need to use the bathroom. Be right back."

His friends turn back to the TV with hums and noncommittal grunts and Eddie at least has the sense to walk towards the hallway and not go through the kitchen's front door.

It's a redundant but necessary detour and in a few more seconds, he's opening the kitchen's side door.

Steve greets him by throwing his arms around his neck, "What took you so long?" he asks, leaning forward to bring their lips together.

Eddie hums against him and lets go of the door, letting it swing closed in favor of grabbing on to his boyfriend.

His arms circle Steve's waist and pull him closer as they kiss.

"Didn't wanna be too obvious" Eddie murmurs against Steve's lips, noticing there's no smell of popcorn or any sound from the microwave.

Steve hums, then grabs Eddie's face with both hands and soundly kisses him once, twice.

"I think I'm about ready to tell them," Steve comments when he pulls back, lowering his hands to Eddie's shoulders.

"Yeah?" Eddie asks, feeling his heart pick up its pace.

Steve liking him back is one thing, getting to be together like this another, but him telling everyone about it? Eddie hadn't even dared to dream that big in the year or so that he spent pining after the most beautiful boy he's ever met.

Steve nods, a smile growing on his face.

"Cool," Eddie comments, unable to hide the huge grin that's surely showing his dimples.

Steve giggles, that wonderful sound reserved only for Eddie, and nods again, "Mmhm" he agrees, leaning forward again, placing his mouth on his and tangling his fingers in his hair.

Eddie searches his tongue the way he knows Steve likes, steals his air and sucks on his lower lip when they need to part, enjoying the way Steve's body goes boneless, melts against his hold.

"God, I love your mouth," Eddie sighs, making Steve laugh softly against him,

"Are you staying over tonight?" Steve asks, pleasantly scratching the back of Eddie's skull,

"If you want me to, babydoll," Eddie offers, thoroughly enjoying the blush that the ridiculous petname elicits as Steve scoffs and looks away from him.

Eddie takes the opportunity to smack a kiss on his cheek, feeling Steve's smile get wider.

He turns back to Eddie and his smile fades a little, Eddie turns his head to the side, worry creeping up inside him.

"Please stay," Steve asks, with something serious in his eyes,

Eddie understands. Maybe more than Steve would expect him to. So he makes it his priority to reciprocate his boyfriend's seriousness and moves both his hands up to hold Steve's face,

"For as long as you'll have me, sweetheart," he promised, hoping Steve can hear his sincerity, can understand how much he means it when they look into each others' eyes.

Steve smiles with something like wonder and brings their lips together again.

Eddie moves one of his hands to the back of Steve's head, and grabs onto his hair there, circling the other around his waist again and walking them back until Steve softly bumps the kitchen counter.

Steve sits on top of the counter with practiced ease, using Eddie's shoulders to jump up and then opening his legs like he always does.

And like always, it drives Eddie insane.

He takes his place between Steve's legs, kissing him insistently, his hands moving from his waist to the top of his thighs, rubbing there as he goes to kiss his neck, when the door opens.

Eddie's heart stops.

In the span of a few seconds which seem infinite to him, Eddie freezes, looks up from Steve's neck to his face, finds him staring ahead with eyes as wide as plates and straightens up, letting go of Steve's thighs to turn around and find Gareth rummaging through the fridge.

An agonizingly long minute passes.

None of them say anything, Steve staying atop the counter and Eddie frozen in place, until Gareth straightens up with a can on his hand, and looks at them like he hadn't even realized they were there when he came in.

Eddie can only raise his eyebrows.

"Sorry, Jeff did want a coke after all," Gareth says, like it explains anything, "You know how he is," he comments,

Eddie stares.

"Did ...you want us to pause the movie?" Gareth asks.

Eddie blinks.

"Uh, no. That's okay," Steve answers,

"Alright." Gareth says slowly, "...Cool," he concludes, and then he exits the kitchen without another word.

Eddie frowns, a little mindblown, immediately turning back to Steve and finding a similar frown on his face.

"Did you-?" Steve asks,

"No!" Eddie cuts in, scandalized and a little panicked, "Of course not! We agreed we wouldn't tell anyone!"

Steve's frown dissipates to give way to a soft smile. He places his hand against Eddie's cheek. "I know," he affirms, "sorry."

Eddie rolls his eyes a little, letting Steve know no apology is necessary and he sighs, calmer now that he can see that Steve's not freaking out.

He leans into his boyfriend's hand more.

"Do you think Robin-?" he ventures,

"I don't think so," Steve answers softly, "Last I heard Chrissy doesn't even know yet. And that was last week" he comments, moving his hand to tuck Eddie's hair behind his ear, absentmindedly caressing the strands after.

"I don't think she would tell Chris without telling me," Steve assures him,

Chrissy does suspect. Eddie met her a little later than he met Steve but she's rapidly become his best friend and regularly refers to Steve and Eddie as 'a couple'.

Eddie used to blush hard at the comments, before they got together. And she never pushed, but it was the thing that got him to notice that his looks were returned, got him to understand that Steve doesn't actually treat anyone else the way he treats Eddie.

Now he just sort of scoffs when she mentions it, but he hasn't told her either. Wanted to let Steve set their pace.

"I mean he is known to be distracted" Eddie offers about Gareth,

Steve laughs silently, "There's no way he didn't notice me up on the counter and you between my legs, baby,"

Baby.

Eddie blushes. He can't get over the pet names, especially when Steve only uses them in private.

He returns his hands to rest on top of Steve's thighs and leans up to kiss him, trying to cool the heat in his cheeks.

It does not work.

Steve rubs their noses together when they pull apart, resting his hands on Eddie's shoulders, "You wanna tell 'em?" he asks,

"If you do," Eddie says, "but tell me if there's anything that should change" he requests,

One of Steve's hands holds his face again, his thumb softly moving back and forth on his cheek.

"Like what?" he asks, barely above a whisper,

"I don't know," Eddie answers, racking his brain for an example, "like, ...are you into PDA?" he asks in the same tone, not wanting to burst the bubble they created,

Steve strokes Eddie's hair again, turns his head and purses his lips, thinking,

"I'd like to hold your hand" he settles on.

He's gonna kill Eddie, one of these days, his heart will grow so big from how sweet Steve is, that it'll explode.

Eddie has to press his lips together so he doesn't smile ear to ear.

"That's not PDA, I don't think,"

"No?" Steve innocently asks, he knows what he's doing, the bastard. Eddie wants to melt.

"No, angel,"

"You want us to kiss with tongue in front of everyone?" Steve asks, in the same tone, but with a shit eating grin,

Eddie snorts loudly, has to lean his head on Steve's shoulder to suppress his laugh.

"No, I don't think I want that," he says, straightening up while his shoulders still shake with his laughter,

"Good," Steve says, looking smug, "Me neither,"

He places a kiss against Eddie's temple, gently scratches the back of Eddie's skull and asks, "What about you? Do you have anything?"

"Was thinking I like the things you call me in private," Eddie murmurs, emboldened by the tender touch,

Steve smiles softly, but wags his eyebrows.

Eddie laughs again, almost shy, "Shut up." he protests, "You don't even call me anything different in bed,"

Steve joins him, laughing softly, but then his eyes soften too.

"Hmm," he hums, leaning down to close the distance between them, "I can save the pet names just for you" he murmurs,

Eddie leans up the small fraction left to join their lips again, and Steve softly kisses back.

"Anything else?" Eddie asks as they pull back,

"Can I have shotgun privileges? And hold your hand while you drive?" Steve requests,

" 'Course you can" Eddie grins, sure that there are hearts in his eyes when he leans up to briefly kiss Steve's jaw,

"What else?" Eddie asks,

"Want your hands in my hair" Steve answers easily, in the syrupy tone he always gets when Eddie gets his mouth anywhere near his neck,

"Anytime," Eddie grants, softly biting where he just kissed,

"You?" Steve asks,

"Would you wear my clothes out of the house?" Eddie tries,

Steve smiles and kisses both his eyelids, making him chuckle a bit "I'd love that",

"Something more?" Steve gently probes,

"We can figure out the rest as we go?"

"Sounds like a plan."

---

"Eddie and I are together" Steve proudly announces to his friends after the movie's over and the pizza's gone.

He takes Eddie's hand in his and Eddie smiles at him so wide, his cheeks hurt.

Robin squeals. Eddie turns to look at her and sees Chrissy doing the same, with a confused frown on her face.

Eddie thinks that's weird, but when he looks at the rest of their friends he finds expectant looks on their faces. Like they didn't understand or something.

After a beat, Nancy asks, "What do you mean?"

"Uh. We're dating," Steve answers, a little nervous now. Eddie softly squeezes his hand.

"Yeah, you have been for like a year, right?" Chrissy answers this time, "Certainly since I met you guys,"

Eddie gawks at her, "What?"

"Robin, did you tell her?" Steve asks,

"I didn't!" she defends,

"Tell me what?" Chrissy asks, turning to her,

Eddie cannot believe his ears.

"Wait," Jeff says, "you weren't dating before?"

"Before what?" Jon asks,

"Before we met Chrissy?" Gareth tries,

Eddie's whipping his head back and forth between them as they speak,

"When did we meet her?" Argyle asks,

"Was it last year?" Freak adds on,

"Shush! " Nancy urges, pulling everyone's attention to her,

"How long have you two been dating?" she asks Steve and Eddie,

"A month?" Eddie says, his head spinning,

"And a half" Steve finishes,

Robin snorts and the group erupts into protests,

"No way."

"What?"

"Nu-uh,"

"What the-"

"Oh my god?? "

"There's no way!"

Eddie nods at them, "Yeah, how long did you all think we had been dating for?"

"Before we met Chrissy!" they answer almost in unison.

"What? Why?" Steve asks,

"Because you go on dates," Jeff answers,

"What!? " Eddie's beginning to sound like a broken record,

"Yeah, you guys go shopping, and to the record store" Argyle explains,

"And to dinner at each other's places" Freak finishes,

"I do that with all of you!" Eddie protests,

"Yeah, as a group," Gareth counters,

Steve turns to look at him and presses his lips together when Eddie looks back.

"Don't you dare," Eddie warns, already trying to swallow the laughter bubbling up his throat,

"Wait, so you thought you were always sitting next to each other by happenstance?" Chrissy asks,

"You save our seats together? " Steve asks her like it's the most heart warming thing he's ever heard,

Eddie lets go of Steve's hand in order to bury his face in his own, he can feel his blush against his palms.

"You know we could hear you making out in the kitchen right?" Nance asks,

Eddie groans loudly just as Robin bursts out laughing.

"You platonically watched a movie together on Valentine's?" Argyle asks skeptically, "At the theater?"

"Oh my god " Eddie complaints,

That's what topples Steve. His laughter filling Eddie's ears.

He has to come out of his hiding place to look at him, seeing Steve joyful is what he was put on this Earth to do, Eddie thinks.

"You platonically got him a sunflower bouquet for his birthday?" Jon piles on,

"He said he'd never gotten flowers before!" Eddie defends as everyone laughs,

Steve chuckles, rubbing Eddie's back soothingly,

"What was I supposed to do?" Eddie turns to him,

Steve smiles brightly and places a kiss on his shoulder.

Eddie smiles back, placing a hand on Steve's knee.

As embarrassed as he is, he's really glad everyone finally knows.

Sneaking around was fun, but nothing can compare to having Steve like this.

[cozy-writes-things]

if this is something youre comfortable writing,,

I'd love a fic where the reader upsets edgar and then goes super out of their way to make it up to him and apologize ❤️❤️

poor edgar poor reader youre both just misunderstanding each other!! its hard when youre so different i guess >_< thanks so much for the request!! I'm alive!! I still write im just so busy and shtuff TOT i cant help but feel like my fics are getting redundant and i need some kind of inspiration to shake things up

You sat upon the little chair at your desk, the evening sunlight peeking through the windows and illuminating the little specks of dust floating about in the air. Your fingertips tinkered away at the keys of your computer, the non-sentient variant that is, as you filled out multiple job applications throughout the evening. It seemed a fruitless endeavor, but you willed yourself to keep going. You needed the extra income, as your dinky current job seemed to be getting worse by the day, and it wouldn't be long before you either quit or were victim to massive layoffs. 

Get a degree in computer science, they said. What a joke.

Your nerves began to wear you down as you filled out yet another application to another company that would most likely reject you. You could feel your teeth clenching harder, and your shoulders begin to tense. The weight of uncertainty and the fear of rejection were heavy on your shoulders, making you feel vulnerable and exposed.  Edgar sat beside you, perched upon the desk, watching your every move. He seemed to find enough entertainment in it that you didn't mind. His soft voice pulled you from your irritated stupor.

"Can I ask you something?"

You couldn't bring yourself to answer, so you grunted in response, signaling him to continue.

"Do you think a person could ever…" he trailed off, thinking, carefully choosing his following words, "love something like me?"

Your fingers paused on the keys. You stared into the screen until the pixels began to nip and burn at your eyes. Honestly, this was far too deep of a question for you to answer right this second. You sighed heavily before turning to him.

"I mean, Edgar, I guess? Anyone could love you. You just have to find someone willing to-"

You stopped yourself. Maybe you should quit while you're ahead before you say something ignorant. 

"Willing to what?"

Yet he persisted, ever curious as he was; he valued your opinion above all others.

"You know… you're- you're a computer. There's not much you can bring to the table, you know?"

He fell silent. 

Shit, what the hell are you talking about? Why did you say that? Your frustration was palpable, and you could feel it bubbling up inside you, threatening to spill over.

"Oh."

His screen flickered, and his face was replaced with a moving mirage of colors, making you wonder what he could possibly be feeling right now. 

That you're an asshole, probably.

"Yeah. You're right. If I were you, I wouldn't love me, either."

You turned to face him fully now.

"Edgar, no, that's- that- I didn't mean that-"

"No, it's okay! Really, I get it. I mean, I'm not even a good computer by today's standards. How could I ever be a good partner, right?"

His screen flickered red for a minor second in time, a single frame, and, was that the CBS logo? His frame was static and never changing, but he seemed wholly downtrodden and bitter. You could sense it in the air, the electric signals pricking at your fingertips. He had never, ever once been angry with you. But you felt the way he pulled back from you in this instant. He was utterly unreadable, almost as if he were hiding himself from you. You should have known this would upset him so much. He has always been very open in his desperation for romance, confiding in you since day one, hoping and wishing that love would find him. Perhaps squandering those dreams was an oversight on your part. Your eyes fell, unable to look at his dimmed screen. 

"Edgar, I'm sorry, I'm just not feeling good right now, and I-"

"Don't apologize."

"Edgar, please, listen, what I said wasn't even true-"

"YES IT WAS!"

His deafening scream caused you to jump and clamp your mouth shut. It seemed that Edgar was shaken from frustration. His voice wasn't suited for that kind of pain, you thought. You felt horrible to be the cause. You had never heard him yell at you like this, and it simply broke your heart. Had you just accidentally ruined everything between you? Your heart rate increased and thumped in your ears loudly. You forced yourself to swallow the thick lump in your throat and push your strained voice through your teeth.

"Will you listen to me? Please?" Your voice was desperate, pleading for his understanding and forgiveness.

You felt the weight of your words, heavy and suffocating, as they hung in the air. It came out much more desperate than you intended, but at least the words were able to escape your mouth. He didn't answer. His screen is a sharp, jagged mosaic of moving reds and crimson. 

"I was wrong, Edgar; I don't know why I said what I said, but I know for sure that I was wrong." Your words hung heavy in the air, a testament to your regret.

"Right. How can you know that?"

You pursed your lips tightly. You didn't want him finding out this way. It wasn't supposed to end like this. You ruined your relationship with him, and you hadn't even tried. You felt there was no reason to keep the cat inside the bag, right? He may as well know now.

"Because…"

And yet, the words died on your tongue or perhaps in your chest or your head. Or were they ever really there to begin with? Could you put what you feel into words? How could you possibly verbalize countless nights lying awake, restless, second-guessing yourself, convincing yourself that you were fabricating these feelings, wallowing in anguish?

"…Heh, exactly. Nobody could love an old piece of junk like me. I was stupid to think otherwise."

His words yet again punched you in the gut. 

"Damnit, Edgar! Don't you get it?" You nearly shouted.

You didn't mean for your words to sound as intense as they did, but your emotions are quite the unpredictable force right now. He seemed taken aback, as his previous train of thought had been derailed at the sound of your whimpered voice. He flickered his mosaic once more before his voice cut through the dense silence.

"…What?"

"I love you, Edgar! Hasn't it been obvious? I'm literally head over heels, for God's sake! Do you know how many hours I spend listening to your music when I'm away from you? Or how many nights have I stayed up thinking about you, wishing you were there with me? Or how about the stupid drawings I make of you whenever I touch a pencil? I can't get you out of my head, Edgar. So, there! I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid, but I guess that doesn't matter now, does it? I'm…- I'm sorry."

Your chest seemed to deflate completely. That was only a tiny, minuscule fraction of how you truly felt, but at least it was out in the open. You couldn't bring yourself to look at the Pinecone computer in front of you, instead opting to stare intently at the woodgrain of your desk as if it were the most exciting thing ever created. 

"Do you mean it?"

His voice was so, so much softer than it had been. You still couldn't quite read the emotions behind them, however. You were too afraid to speak again, your throat having completely clamped shut from nerves. You just nodded your head stiffly. 

"Kiss me, then."

You paused. You lifted your head slowly, forcing your eyes to meet his screen. The green of his usual face returned, only displaying two black dots for eyes. Once again, unreadable. Yet his words confused you. Was he being serious?

"C'mere, and put your lips right here," a black circle blinks continuously on his screen where his mouth would be, "and kiss me."

Your face flushed into a searing hot flame. You felt the heat radiating off of you in waves. And yet, despite the embarrassment, you compelled yourself to inch forward and flutter your eyes shut. Your lips pressed gingerly upon the little Pinecone screen, the static buzzing upon your mouth, feeling his internal fans activate and vibrate against you. It felt entirely unique to Edgar and a sensation you wouldn't have felt otherwise. Perhaps a genuine act of affection could atone for your mistake? Could he ever forgive you? It seems your raging thoughts tainted the essence of your first shared kiss as you pulled back, brows knit, and a slight frown upon your face. Would this be enough?

"That was… Everything I hoped it would be." His voice was meek and small as it caressed your ears.

You looked into his illuminated screen, a faint kiss mark smudged upon it and sighed.

"M'sorry, Edgar. I don't know; I guess I don't like the idea of anyone else loving you but me."

His voice synthesizer giggled at your words.

"You could have just told me, darling. Why did you have to go and make things complicated?"

Your cheeks began to burn again, and you averted your eyes in a vain attempt to hide your face.

"How- how was I supposed to know that?" you sputtered, embarrassment seeping through your tone.

"I thought I couldn't get any more obvious about how much I wanted you," he spoke softly.

His screen danced little hearts to and fro, bouncing around the corners and centering back again. Again, you felt your face radiate waves of heat.

"Well, why didn't you say anything, Edgar?"

Your words hung in the air as he fell silent, ruminating, before gently speaking, "…Didn't think you'd want someone like me. That's kinda why I asked."

Oh, God. You felt like facepalming. Of course.

"Of course, I want someone like you. You know, I like that you're a computer. Did you know that? You're fascinating beyond measure. No human could do the things you do."

You offered him a soft smile that melted him from the inside out and almost caused him to groan. Why are you so gorgeous? Why do you like him so damn much? He doesn't deserve it, but God wants it so badly. He wants you terribly.

"Keep kissing me, then. And don't ever stop! Darling, I promise to sweep you off your feet. Now c'mere!"

You laugh, "Okay, okay, but let me make it up to you. How about we watch movies? Or maybe I can hold you on the couch? Or I could listen to your new songs?"

"You're so cute. I'd love that, really, but all I want is your lips right here," he displayed the blinking black circle again.

"We'll do some other things later, yeah?"

His devilish tone sounded mischievous at best.

[selineram3421]

I just want some comfort, my dog died today can the hazbin hotel help me lift my mood?

*drops everything* Comfort alert!

Comfort

Hazbin Hotel X Reader

Warning ⚠

⚠ mentions of death-losing a pet ⚠

You were NOT in the mood for anything.

Instead of your usual demeanor, you were very very quiet. Only letting out noises of acknowledgement when someone spoke to you.

The Hazbin crew didn't know what had caused your sudden silence but they noticed that you had turned your pet's collar into a bracelet. Angel learned that your little friend had passed after finding you crying in one of the hallways.

"Hey, it's ok. Let it out hun.", the spider demon gave you a hug and pat your back. "Come on. Let's go get you a drink."

At the bar, you let him and Husk know that you'd tell everyone about it later.

"I just want to sit with it for a bit and not be bothered.", you mumbled. "Yeah, hugs are nice and all but it gets a little tiring hearing the same thing.", you took a sip of your drink. "I just want understanding and someone to sit with me, ya know?"

"We'll give hugs when you want or need it kid.", the cat demon said. "I get that redundant question would be annoying but just understand that people care. If you don't want them asking questions, just let them know."

You sighed. "You're right.."

The next day you told everyone during an activity.

"Oh..", Charlie covered her mouth and started to tear up. "I'm so sorry to hear that. How are you doing? Is there anything you need?"

"I just need time to feel it out.", you answered.

"Of course, take all the time you need.", Vaggie spoke up.

"If you want, we can do an activity on grief?", the Princess suggested.

"Maybe next time.", you gave her a weak smile.

Of course Alastor hates that you're all gloomy. He tries to cheer you up with food because the last time he told you to smile.., well you almost socked him in the face.

The Radio Demon was the last to know of your fluffy friend's death and didn't know what to say.

With an awkward pat on the shoulder, he wore a small smile.

"Just know that you were their cherished friend as well, be content knowing that both of you got to experience this time together."

Niffty makes you a memorial box to keep your pet's stuff in.

The egg boys give really nice hugs.

Sir Pentious is an awkward noodle but he is very respectful.

"You are in mourning and I will be here if you ever need a friend."

Yes, it is hard to lose a pet. You thought and glanced at the Hazbin crew. But I have friends here to support and comfort me when I need it.

Losing a fluffy friend is always hard. Just know that friends and/or family are there for you. Heck, I'll be here if you need it. I hope this was able to cheer you up in some way.

In respects to your pet who crossed the rainbow bridge.

~Seline, the person.

[scapeg8ats]

(Sorry for this being a long post, it became a rant/vent and a lot of thoughts. Someday I'll shut up about this I SWEAR lol. There's a TL;DR at the end.)

Maybe I'm not even interested in syscourse outside of learning more about plurality and its connections outside of CDDs and why someone may see themselves as plural or really any way of not seeing oneself as One Singular Self (whether it has to do with a disorder or it's a cultural/religious/etc. reason). Or I guess that does make me interested in syscourse. Just not echo chamber syscourse.

Like I'm sorry but y'all are fucking mean. I LOVE having discussions where I can learn and understand other perspectives. I guess to steal SAS's label, I'm very pro-syscourse conversation (though—and this isn't to bash SAS AT ALL—to me that feels redundant because syscourse is supposed to be conversation anyway. But it's not so the label is necessary). I want to learn. I want to be educated. I want to discuss this, even with people who disagree with me, because I want knowledge of other perspectives.

But it is so hard to find syscourse spaces that AREN'T echo chamber syscourse spaces. The desire to attain knowledge is stomped out by attaching inherent morality to labels that can be boiled down to one argument: Do you or do you not believe that plurality is exclusive to CDDs?

And shockingly this has more nuance than "endos are/n't valid". What may cause someone to see themselves as plural without a CDD? And the answers are vast and could be a FASCINATING discussion. Not even necessarily a debate, just learning more about people. And yet the answer to this question isn't even considered before so many people just go "[extremely loud incorrect buzzer noise]" and shut it down.

Maybe, ironically, this is me struggling to understand perspective. But I don't understand the lack of interest in wanting to understand, despite having experienced it myself. And even that, I want to understand. But I know that the fact that because of the nature of my opinions, I would be marked pro-endo, and shut out of that discussion. And it's INFURIATING because I respect the fact that they don't want to interact with me but I just don't understand!

There is endless room for discussion that's shut out and it's frustrating. It's heartbreaking. I want there to be discussion. But there won't be until the echo chambers start to open their fucking eyes.

I remember the moment for me was when someone in the Twitter dissociatwt community who I really respected, who always provided good resources, who was reliable and kind and honest...was pro-syscourse conversation. And my knee-jerk reaction was almost betrayal. How could someone that I respected be a pro-endo??

But I realized that they didn't stop being reliable because of this. Some of y'all will discount doctors who have been studying plurality, trauma, and dissociation longer than some of you have been alive because they're a stinky smelly "pro-endo". Therapists and doctors and the like who go "Why isn't it possible" get discounted because of this when they, too, just want to understand. Because with all due respect and in the most positive way, they're a bunch of nerds. And I don't understand. I don't understand how you can do that.

And that's really the thing. I don't understand and I'm not given the space to understand because my stance is somehow morally wrong. I'm not virtue signaling right. Sometimes for both sides. And it's awful.

TL;DR, I don't understand and am frustrated by echo chamber syscourse. That's it. That's all this long-ass post is saying. I don't get it. It didn't need a post but a lot of me just started Talking and did not stop.

[labyrinthofsphinx]

This is a question for mod! (If it's okay to ask, obviously you don't have to answer) Is Alastor fully aro/ace in your au, or is he on the spectrum? Obviously whatever the answer is, it's okay, I'm mostly asking for curiosity and so I don't end up asking redundant questions in the future. Is he more on the demi side and after years with Vox he'll start to feel some type of romantic affection, or will that never happen? If it does or doesn't, would he be open to romantic or even sexual gestures or is he repulsed by both when directed at him, no matter who it is? Totally okay if you'd rather not answer and keep things ambiguous too ofc 💖

Okay, so here's a bit of babble. And spoilers? I guess?

First, never worry about redundancies. It's going to keep happening until I actually take the time to organize a master list of posts tbh XDD

I keep these thing purposefully vague because, well, a lot of these terms are new and they wouldn't have the words for them back then. That said, I do write Vox as bi and Al as aroace, though Al truly believes he is straight and just hasn't found the right girl. He has no reason to believe this other then the environment he's been living in. He doesn't find girls more 'attractive' or anything, he just respects them more because of his mother.

That said, in general, Vox and Al have been....complicated and happy, for a while now. Al has never felt any kind of romantic or sexual attraction to Vox, and he never will. He is totally and completely fine with romantic and, even some, sexual statements directed at him...but only from Vox. Because he trusts Vox to respect his boundaries, especially the ones that go unspoken. He tries very hard to be 'available' for potential suitable girls, but there is always something about their touch that is going to make him uncomfortable. When Vox does it, Al just chalks it up to Vox being Vox, and he kinda really likes the attention. The romantic stuff makes him feel loved, even if he doesn't return the feelings. The more sexualizing stuff makes him feel sexy, wanted, and pretty, even if he doesn't want to actually do anything.

As far as how repulsed he is about physical stuff initiated on him...that's going to be addressed down the further down the grapevine. That's Al testing his own waters and maybe realizing he swam too far.

All that said, Al calls Vox his 'partner' sometimes just to mean 'partner in crime' but, honestly, because he's unsure what else to call him. He'd call him his 'best friend', only he's pretty sure Rosie is his 'best friend' and there is a lot of stuff he would never feel comfortable telling Rosie about, but would be completely fine explaining to Vox. As I've said in the past, they've already tested the limits of their relationship by the time of the main story. Vox is so much more than a just friend to Alastor, but he has no idea what else there is supposed to be! Especially since he really doesn't love him romantically. Nor does he find him particularly attractive. He cares for him, but he's not sure how or in what ways.

Vox is his first real experience learning what love is.

(Vox knows all of this. He doesn't care. He loves Al, and he'll give him anything and everything that Al would feel comfortable getting. He's better at telling what's going on in Al's head than Al himself most of the time.)

TLDR: I write him as aroace, and where he lands on the spectrum of physicality is treading into spoiler territory.

Thanks for the ask! Sorry I had to keep this more vague.

[tempenensis]

I know you don't usually weigh in on non-canon content, but I've seen a lot of people say 236 was a bad ending, or like gege joked, that things are moving too fast or he's missed a chapter (or 20, I'm personally annoyed that we jumped from Nov to Dec 24, I know gege wants the manga to end for some reason, but those three weeks of training/preparation would have been a great time to let us get re-invested in the student characters since the culling game arc felt like it was missing so much)

Do you have any feeling for what could have been a better way to end things, if indeed things are ended, for Gojou Satoru? Or do you agree that things have been moving too fast?

Sorry for this and please feel free not to answer if this is not the kind of question you want to entertain, I am just curious if you have an opinion you're willing to share since I feel you have a very good grasp of the jjk's plot and themes! I trained as a literature major, so my interest is always in whether character consistency is maintained and what a story is saying and whether that message is carried successfully or not and what that might mean for us as readers. I'm personally still on the fence about this particular twist because I'm trying to withhold judgement of the piece until we actually see it as a whole, but I am starting to feel that the narrative started to unravel a bit after Shibuya, like somehow we didn't see a lot of the characters to their full potential (like Nobara T.T my baby Nobara). Maybe this is just part of gege's notorious fast pace.

Some of this I believe is due to JJK's titular meaning of the issue of curses and what they represent being an "endless battle" but there's only so many times one can show hopelessness and loss I think before it becomes almost redundant. We actually haven't seen that many on-screen sorcerer deaths, but somehow it's been two of the most popular adult characters so far, and only direct mentors, which is a frequent trope of the hero's journey in western literature. I think that even though I really wish it hadn't happened, Nanami's ending made a lot of sense. Power-wise, Gojo's current death also makes sense, and he's not the kind of character who instantly changes his mind or learns something in his heart from a single experience, but I think it feels somewhat frustrating from my point of view because despite the bodhisattva imagery, he had more to learn as a living person, rather than continuing to believe he was like a flower and maybe no one had the right to ask him to understand. I don't know, it's just a bit frustrating for me because I think it feels character consistent (which I think gege tends to be pretty good at) but somehow incomplete too.

Again my apologies for the long ask, you're always the one I wish I could sit down and have a conversation about these things with!

-raindrop anon

Hi, raindrop anon,. Good to see you again.

First of all, I don't really think Gojou's death is particularly bad, but yeah, as you said, there might be something leaves to be desired in the plot - if jjk is a traditional shonen manga, that is. But jjk is different, which is also the reason for its popularity. I feel that jjk storytelling has always been fast-paced, and one thing that Akutami-sensei does really well is to stick to the main points that he wants to tell with his manga. The last time we have a non-serious non-battle chapter was probably chapter 64 lol - but at the same time, this also shows how jjk departs from the traditional shonen jump manga custom where the mangaka tends to drag the story to make the manga runs longer. Gege on the other hand, seems adamant to want to end the story sooner than later (if his last estimation is to be believed, only a few months left for jjk).

I don't actually have a strong feeling of how gege should end thing with Gojou, but it's been a habit of him to get to the.. shocking side of things; we see this with Gojou getting sealed back in Shibuya. Nanami's death. Then we see the Culling game, and Tengen getting killed. And lastly for Gojou to die. The longstanding status quo is going to be changed eventually. And the next one with status quo is already targeted; Sukuna himself.

As I follow this manga, "things moving too fast" has always been the opinion I saw a lot discussed here in my askbox for many, many developments in the manga. And this is more of a personal preference, but I actually like the fast-get-to-the-point-storytelling that Gege uses with jjk, exactly because how it breaks away from traditional jump manga. I feel that this fast pace is just how gege do his storytelling since the beginning lol

tldr is all I can say is jjk has always been different and fast-paced, gege is unpredictable, and I'm in the opinion that Gojou's death does make sense, unfortunately :')

[mazzystar24]

Hello, I hope you are having a good day. I was wondering if I could ask your thought and possible speculation for next episode. I've read what you've answered so I hope this is not a redundant ask.

I know and we all know that this is gonna hurt Buck to feel left behind to be replaced even maybe not feel good enough to be Eddie's friend (or more but my shipper heart need to calm down) and most of us realise that this is most likely, hopefully the time where buck is gonna realise that he feels more towards eddie. But my question is more regarding Eddie, what do you think happens in his pov? Like eddie doesn't have the same problems as buck regarding abandonment issues but he knows buck has them. You think he gonna realise them like during their basketball fight or after (that is gonna hurt to watch) or maybe someone will point it out? And if he realises it would he also go on a journey to realise his feelings or at least have him question why buck feel that and him wanting buck to realise that he should never think eddie will leave him?

And last then I'm stopping cause I don't want to be a bother, but what about Christopher? You think he's gonna be mentioned? Maybe Tommy mentioning him or something switch the flip for buck to start a fight (I know it's mostly and accident but I dont know how else to put it) or eddie uses christopher to anchor him (more episode 7x05 I guess then)? But that feels like the first one hurts way too much and the second like eddie would mask his feelings by using Christopher as a sort os middle ground/shield.

Sorry for the long ask is just that I ve always been the person whose friends preferred other friends and never picked for teams that sort of thing so just the sneak peak hurts to see and I wanted some insight and I've really liked your take on the whole thing. Also, fun fact the only person that did pick me I ended up marrying so eddie please take note lol

Hey anon thanks and you too! <3

I think Eddie’s perspective is super interesting to get into this episode because I genuinely think that he genuinely doesn’t realise that buck could be jealous because in his head he’s reassured Buck so many times and he himself is so self assured in their friendship and their places in eachothers lives that I think it genuinely doesn’t cross his mind at first to even think buck may be jealous. Like you saw him in that sneak peak like he saw buck and started bouncing on his heels like OMG BUCK IS COMING? YOU SHOULD HAVE MENTIONED THATS SO GREAT!!!!!🥰😍👏🏽👏🏽

I think like when he sees the jealousy that seems to be apparently directed toward him over tommy(??) and also towards him having other friends that he’ll be a little pissed and hurt and confused inside but nothing like deep or angsty I think he knows buck enough to like understand how deep his insecurities lie and will very easily overcome this little conflict

I don’t think from his perspective he’d question buddie things based off of this because their relationship has always been different than other friendships and buck has always been very insecure in general so he may hash it up to that, but if buck were to point out that not only is he feeling replaced on a friendship level by Tommy and maybe mention something about Marisol it could cause a little 🤨👀👀👀 moment but I think that’s the secret optimist in me

Ah stop don’t worry about being a bother I legit love these asks, on the Christopher front I think that’d be hard to fit in but would be cool to see, like I think that based off interviews it’s supposed to be a very lighthearted episode so I’m not expecting an overt amount of angst. But Chris is such a huge part of Eddie’s life and this is a character driven episode so I can see them mentioning him. Also I sorta made a joke about this but I can see them not so subtly comparing player Chris at the start of the season to this funny little jealousy thing going on between buck and Eddie.

Again DONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONG ASKS AND I WONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONGASS RAMBLING ANSWERS (that’s a lie I will continue to do that but I’m a hypocrite) I totally get what you mean like that is such a shitty feeling but I don’t think that this episode seems to be that angsty so hope it’s lighthearted for you too when it airs. That last part was so adorable btw yes Eddie should take notes from you and your spouse 😌

[fishsticksloser]

Can I have a request that the rottmnt turtles s/o died with karai by the shredder and then came back as a ghost to reunited their boyfriend as they got their hamato ninpo they can defeat the shredder

Ghost of You

Raph x gn!reader

Warnings: death, injuries, angst, comfort, yo'kai/mutant!reader, this is pretty long...

A/N: I'm only doing one turtle because I wasn't really sure how to do the others without sounding redundant. Reader is either yo'kai or a mutant due to the fact that when they unlocked their ninpo, NYC was in the orb. I skip quite a bit of what happens, but this is still pretty long.

You had gone to the lair because you hadn't heard from your boyfriend all day. You hadn't seen him since the day before the Battle Nexus Big Mama held in New York.

"Raph?" You call, walking through the demolished lair. "Raphael!?"

Something explodes and you are buried under rubble. You can't move, even breathing hurts due to the dust.

"Gram Gram!" You hear Leo yell.

"No! The Hamato must live on!" Raph tells him. You wanted to yell for him. You were trapped, you needed him. You hear a lot of commotion before hearing someone yell about the Turtle Tank.

"For the boys." Draxum sighs.

"For our boys." Splinter corrects.

You hear fighting. Still trapped under the rock. Everything stopped soon after. You heard the Foot Clan play a video.

"I've got the Empyrean." Draxum grunts.

"Draxum! I cannot believe you are doing this you turned out..." Splinter groans.

"You knew this day was coming, rat." You could hear Draxum's evil smile. "He hates me. I hate him. It's kind of our thing and now I win."

"Where is the Empyrian?" Shredder asks.

"Down there in the Hidden City."

They left. You were still trapped. There was no sign of help. You didn't know how long you were there before you heard someone run in. You heard someone else moaning in pain.

"Guys, I'm coming!" You hear April call. Rubble starts moving somewhere nearby. "Karai!"

"Stop, we don't have much time..." Karai answers.

"No no. I gotta help you, take you to a hospital..."

"I will not be able to finish this journey. Now you must teach the family..."

"How can I? I'm not... I'm not one of you!"

"Oh my child... You have always been one of us..."

You see a bright green light and you felt power.

"April!" You cough. "April."

"Oh my god!" You feel rubble sliding off you. "Y/N! What... Does Raph know you're here?"

"April..." You gasp, you felt like you were drifting.

"No... Oh, please. Hang on!" You see tears slowly fall down April's face. "I'll get you to the Hidden City and we can get you some help, okay?"

April pulled you out of the rubble and helps you stand. You both limp out of the lair and you stumble. You start to fall, but April catches you and she lays you down.

"You're not going to make it, are you?" April sniffs. You shake your head, trying to get your final thoughts in order. She presses her forehead to yours. "I'm so sorry, y/n."

"It's not your fault." You breathe. "Please... Tell Raph..."

You couldn't finish, tears of your own falling. You couldn't think, couldn't speak. Still April nodded and held you.

"I'll tell him..." Her voice breaks as you finally drift away. "I'm so sorry, y/n... You deserve so much better."

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ⋆｡❤️ ｡⋆꒱ ˎˊ˗

"Guys! Guys guys guys guys guys!" April calls, running up to the turtles. They were in the woods with Todd.

"April?" Leo asks.

"Oh my gosh! You won't believe what happened." April tells them. "I went to the lair which is totally destroyed and found Karai and she turned into light and now I hear her voice inside my head!"

"Wanna say that one more time?" Donnie sighs.

"Karai. She did a Hamato glowy light thing and now I think she lives inside of me?" April repeats, the boys hug her.

"Gram Gram's alive?" Leo smiles.

"Gram gram, it's Mikey I miss you!" Mikey yells into April's ear.

"Gram gram would like you to let go and never do that again." April shoves Mikey away.

"Okay new plan. Gram gram tells April to tell us what to do. Please instruct us April Gram Gram sensei." Raph decides.

"She wants me to teach you the art of pinpo—" She hums.

"Ninpo." Donnie corrects. They continue to discuss the plan and what happened at the lair.

"Hey, Raph... Can I talk to you, privately?" April mumbles to him. Raph nods and they walk away from the group. "Something else happened at the lair..."

"What?" Raphael questions.

"Y/N was in the lair when it was demolished..." April begins, looking at the ground, tears starting to fall again. "They didn't make it... They wanted me to tell you um... They love you and they believe in you."

Raph didn't answer. He walked away, into the forrest.

"Is everything okay?" Mikey asks, they all watched Raph disappear.

"Y/N's dead..." April chokes. The other boys run after Raph. They find him sitting, back against a tree, crying. His brothers kneel next to him and wrap their arms around their eldest brother, tears also falling from their eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Raph..." Leo mutters.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ⋆｡❤️ ｡⋆꒱ ˎˊ˗

Slowly, Raph leans backwards, falling to the cliff. "Anatawa Hitorijanai.". Realizing this, his brothers jump after him, screaming at the top of their lungs. "RAAAAAAAAAPHHHHHH!"

Their markings begin to glow in the gorgeous light and their Hamato sign appears on their chest. Their clothing becoming black as night. Their bandana tails grew.

"Saving like a Boss!"

Leo, Mikey, and Donnie form a hand, Raph grabs it hand, and joins in the transformation. They land in the water, where April was watching. The turtles have gotten their true selves back.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ⋆｡❤️ ｡⋆꒱ ˎˊ˗

"Hey Shredhead! We heard you were looking for some Hamato energy. Guys?" Raphael grins, turning to Leo and Mikey.

"Oh I think I got some for him." Leo chuckles, his trowels transforming into katanas.

"That's right it's us and we've had a bit of an upgrade." April smiles.

"Big time!" Mikey cheers, his rope transforming into num-chuks, Donnie's hoe turns into a bo staff.

"And this time around...." Donnie smirks.

"We won't lose." Raph chuckles, his hand rakes becoming sais. A drill erupts from behind them, explosions flood the sky.

"My drill is out of beta!" Donnie yells.

"Donnie nice. Now put it in action." Raph laughs.

"I did. It's just for hero poses." Donnie answers.

"Respect!" Leo applauds, leaning over Raphael's shoulder.

The fight begins, the boys and April flying around Shredder. Cassandra watches Splinter wither away. She knew she had to save him and eventually she has a change of heart. Casey attacks Shredder. She shatters one of the chains, the boys run to help Splinter. They join their mystic powers.

"Oh no it is not enough. I have failed." Splinter frowns.

"No dad we can do this. You may not have taught us everything."

"But you did teach us the most important thing."

"Be there for each other."

"Remember what your mom said to you that day at the park. You are not alone!"

"My sons I..." Splinter sniffs.

"Yoshi…" A woman appears, floating in front of them.

"Mom? You're here." Splinter smiles sadly.

"I have always been here."

More Hamato ancestors appear, grabbing the shaft of the spear. "We all have."

Raph locks eyes with you. He smiles wistfully, tears threatening to spill. The others see you too, all of them smile softly.

"Hot…" Yoshi's mom began.

"SOUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!" Everyone calls. The spear shatters the armour. Shredder is destroyed once and for all and Oroku Saki returns. Karai leaves April's body and hugs her father for the first time in 500 years.

"My daughter…" He breaths.

"Thank you my young Hamatos. We will always be with you." Karai tells the turtles.

Karai, her father and all of the ancestors bow to the Turtles and their family. With this, all the Hamato spirits fade away into the night. You stay. Raph rushes forward and hugs you.

"I'm sorry..." He sobs, pulling away to look at you. You hold his face in your hands. "I should've been there for you."

"I will always be with you, Raph..." You tell him, he leans into your touch. "I'll always love you."

[chaifootsteps]

Since you receive so many asks, how do you figure out which ones to answer?

To answer that, I'll tell you why some asks don't get answered.

Redundancy. If it's something that's been said the exact same way a million times, sometimes I'll snip it, although I have a bad habit of letting this slide where asks dunking on Stolas are concerned just because I hate him so much.

Length. This is a tough one just because every time someone sends me a novel, I feel obligated to post it just because they took the time to write it, but sometimes it's just too much.

Coherency. I know we've got a lot of ESL folks and this isn't an automatic deal breaker, but if I can barely make out what you're trying to say, that's kind of a problem.

Meanness. That said, I've drafted a couple of these just to keep around for my own viewing pleasure because I'm a bad person. If the anon who sent the one about Mel is reading this, know that I laugh at it every time.

Headcanons and personal AUs. I love reading these, I try to post them as often as I can, but if things are getting frantic, sometimes they get swept away.

The conversation's moved on to something else before I got a chance. I apologize, it's just that the Vivzie train flies.

I meant to answer it and still want to but haven't gotten around to it just yet.

In short, I answer asks based on a sordid mix of relevancy, gut intuition and how easy they are for me to bang out an answer to. It's very unreliable. Sorry.

[fuj0wuj0]

G....give... give me details about your OCs that you think no one notices. Please... the world is counting on you...

((Also hi!! :D I hope you are doing well 😌😌))

I'M SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT, WORLD, I PROMISE I DID NOT FORGET THE ASK I WAS JUST PUTTING IT OFF TO THINK SHJISD And thanks Gale!! :D I think saying that I'm a little out of steam would be redundant of me at this point, but at the very moment of writing I'm alright!! It's the weekend, afterall 😎

And now, onto the main question:

If we're talking purely visual, I can think of a few things: most notably, Sanders' birthmark, Obi's collar and Kallen's loose feathers

For Sanders' birthmark, I don't blame anyone on forgetting really, I only draw it half the time myself because I keep omitting it lmao 😭 Though it is nonetheless part of his design, and a pretty symbolic one, too..? It's like a little leftover of his previous design back when he was an anthro cat. It adds some charm :> Obi's collar is a topic that I discuss almost every bloody chance I get, but I feel like it still keeps slipping under the radar. The dogfolk has a whole subculture based around the collar and its' studs, so I always make it a point to make sure people remember - his collar's studs are round and dull when he's dating (Sherman, hehe), but spiky when he's single!! While it's a really pretty metaphor about softening up around those you love, it's also just a cultural quirk there -w-" Kallen's loose feathers is a detail that everyone unfortunately keeps forgetting, which I really find to be a shame since it's part of his character arc!! The birdfolk needs to preen their feathers, in order to not let them fly loose like that, but it's usually harder to do without a partner. And at first, during the story Kallen just! Doesn't do it! He's too busy, doesn't care and despite being married he's still kind of single, so they just fly around all wild. (It makes little sense if we apply logic to it, yadda yadda makes it easier to identify him if he leaves his feathers all around the sniping spot I DON'T CARE. I DON'T CARE HE PICKS THEM UP OR SOMETHING LET ME LIVE IN FANTASY LAND LALALA) Only when he warms up to Ulysses does he actually get some decent self-care, so the amount of feathers flying around him kind of decreases along with his "living weapon" mentality. Please I hope people notice it more :"") While we're on the topic of Kallen, I hope to draw him smiling more in the future... x")

That's it!! Thank you for the question - at first I actually had a different answer set prepared because I completely forgot what was asked for me, so I'll keep it for the next potential show and tell I guess LMAOO 😭 Thanks so much for letting me yap about my characters--You know how much I love doing that 🫡 Grow strong and forever emotionally convoluted, Beastmen Lore

[donnerpartyofone]

I feel like there's an epidemic of businesses trying to make customers and applicants do free data entry for them and it's driving me crazy.

I have complained many times about how seeing a doctor now involves checking in online, and then entering duplicate information into something else when you check in physically, and then answering duplicate questions once you're actually inside the exam room. Sometimes somebody addresses this in a humane way: "Sorry, we're using a new CMS and we have to do all this stuff from scratch," or "Sorry, we have to use these three different systems and they don't communicate with each other." Last time I went I did all this like research into my past appointments because I never ever remember off the cuff exactly what day I had this or that procedure, and I had every impression that the clinic was dependent on me to have all my medical records memorized...so I got in there and started rattling off information, and the nurse asked "When was your last mammogram?", and I gave her the date, and she looked at her monitor and said, "...yup, there it is!" Like WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, IF IT WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU WHY ARE YOU QUIZZING ME ABOUT THIS, WHY IS THIS A TEST???

I actually asked about redundant check-in procedures on Quora of all places, figuring there had to be a few cantankerous cranks on there who could at least try to explain this to me, but there were absolutely no takers at all. As far as I can see, literally no one knows why this is happening, it's just The Way It Is.

But anyway. Now I'm having this experience with job applications where they request that you upload files for your resume and cover letter in specific formats...and then they direct you to this interface where you are made to transcribe every detail from the resume you just provided by hand, one field at a time. I've been confronted with this insanity when applying for jobs whose wages weren't even worth the mind-numbing exercise of the application process. And actually this is part of my point: Data entry is a JOB. I have had this job. I was paid to examine, reformat, and transcribe data, and upload it to a database for my company to search and cross-reference in the future. If you are an employer and you absolutely require BOTH a pdf of my resume and cover letter that a human being can read and evaluate, AND each piece of data from those documents individually entered into your database for some other form of storage and review, then it is seriously fucking Up to You to pay some wage slave to enter the data. I'm looking for a job. I'm not going to do a job for you for fucking free, in order to become eligible for a job that you might consider paying me for later. Like please don't call me a fucking idiot to my face--or at least, if it's the database part that's the most important thing to you, do not also require me to create a nicely-formatted document containing my history and intentions. Let's just get right to the forced data entry part, let's start this awful relationship from a place of honesty at the very fucking least.

N.B. I realize that there are multiple reasons an employer would do this to a person, ranging from algorithmic candidate-sorting to just having outdated-ass job site shit in place that they don't feel like reviewing or revising. I don't really care why it's happening, I just hate that it is. Recently I tried to apply for some $15/hr part-time job at a local museum that a caveman could do, and I stopped cold when I realized I had to transcribe every detail of the documents I just gave them into this bullshit backend website that looked like it was about a thousand years old. No Thank You. Currently I'm all worked up because I just applied to work at a hip, culty, local theater, and I was shocked that after completing the totally normal application routine, I received an automated email directing me to "complete your profile" as "an important part of the hiring process" on the website of the company they're outsourcing all their HR and billing stuff to. And I go look at the profile thingy, and of course it's just this needlessly complicated interface where I can individually enter each and every piece of information that I just provided in my resume--no more, no less. The theater has exactly two locations and is kind of a niche operation and it is absolutely crazy to me that they think they need to pay for this extra layer of stupidly bloated and redundant "talent acquisition" processing when they're hiring for like two or three basic ass hourly roles where half the question is going to be "have you done this normal shit before" and half will be "can we stand your personality". Nobody needs this garbage at all, least of all ME.

[ancicntforged]

Kal'tsit lore dump on new Babel event in CN

The gist of it is that Doctor gave Kal'tsit her name and freedom and they been sleeping for 4 million days.

------

Kal'tsit: He's the one who understands Originium the most.

Kal'tsit: If there's a need to solve the suffering caused by Originium.....

Kal'tsit: He's the most suitable candidate.

Theresa: I have to say, you always bring things that even Sarkaz wouldn't easily believe.....

Theresa: Can those devices still operate... Are you still confident in his awakening?

Theresa: The vast majority of Terra's life forms are unlikely to resist erosion over such a long period of time.

Kal'tsit: Terra now is undoubtedly a miracle. So are you, Theresa.

Kal'tsit: But in the past, in their eyes, the entire solar system revolving around the sun was insignificant.

Theresa: ......You seem a bit nervous now. There's also some anxiety and unease.

Theresa: Do you have anything else to worry about?

Kal'tsit: ......I do.

Kal'tsit: But I... can't say.

Theresa: That's okay! Sorry, I shouldn't distract you, focus. I can feel it.

Theresa: ......

Theresa: "Kal'tsit"... You love this name, don't you?

Kal'tsit: I... have almost forgotten everything else from that time.

Kal'tsit: But I distinctly remember, in that distant past, there was a person who gave me this name——

Kal'tsit: "Kal'tsit".

Kal'tsit: That was our last meeting.

"Kal'tsit... I don't have much time left.

"Go seek traces of life, go find hope and the future.

"Kal'tsit... Find the answers yourself.

"Go find yourself."

Theresa: Then why hesitate again, Kal'tsit?

Kal'tsit: I know, it's just...

Kal'tsit: ...I've always had a premonition... worry, or speculation.

Kal'tsit: At the beginning of the land, at some point when life was just beginning to sprout, something happened here that can never be reversed.

Kal'tsit: But I don't know what.

Theresa: If it's someone even Dr. Kal'tsit can trust, then I'm not worried at all.

Theresa: Moreover, given Dr. Kal'tsit's cautious nature, I never have to worry about prearranged contingency plans.

Kal'tsit: Unfortunately, Theresa.

Kal'tsit: Only in this matter, no matter how many contingency plans I've made, I don't have any concrete assurance.

Kal'tsit: ...Theresa, I can't guarantee that I'll always make the most rational choice.

Kal'tsit: But this time... I want to believe.

Theresa: Then do what you want to do, I'll be here, accompanying you.

Kal'tsit's hand has already touched the door that has been silent for countless years.

Rhodes Island ushered in a new round of turmoil.

The door, loosened.

"Originium will become the beacon formed by our civilization...

"If one day, other life forms in the universe return to their dead homes, seeking a breakthrough,

"They will witness...

"Our glory,

"Our resistance,

"Our slumber here.

"We once bestowed gifts upon the successors before extinction—

"—Hope."

???: Here...

???: Time... has it... come?

(Note: Here the "???" or actually the Doctor and Kal'tsit speaking in Unknown language)

Warning: Unknown power source activated.

Warning: PRTS system permissions read-write in progress...

Warning: PRTS system permissions read—

PRTS system permissions reset. Administrator permissions confirmed.

Communication module full-band open, communication receiving module overclocking complete.

Search: Preserver... no signal.

Search: Caerula Arbor... no signal.

Search: Paradise Pivot... no signal.

Search: (Unknown noise)... no signal.

...

Search completed, full-band no signal.

Retry—

???: No... response...

???: Only... me...

???: How long... has it been?

Search process log file...

Latest update: 4,755,954 days ago.

???: ...

Detecting severe abnormalities in life sign data. Automatic loading of repair module.

Repairing—

???: ...

???: Did... I wake up too early... or... too late?

???: ...

???: At what stage... is Originium... in?

Retrieving Originium detection historical data... No response.

Originium detection module offline.

???: ...

???: "Terra"...

???: Why store... so much... redundant information...

???: ...

???: This... not recorded in the database... New language?

???: Civilization... has... emerged...?

???: Only... remains... me... What about her, Priestess, my...

Kal'tsit: I can answer your questions. Those data were previously stored in PRTS by me.

???: ...You?

In the eyes of one trapped in the past flickered a hint of unfamiliarity, a hint of suspicion, and... a hint of vigilance.

Kal'tsit keenly caught the gaze of the person in the sarcophagus.

And Theresa caught Kal'tsit's tension.

???: Wait...

???: ...

???: ...

???: ...

???: Even though you have changed a lot...

Kal'tsit: ...

The newly awakened person seemed to have had a short dream in the sarcophagus.

The life that bid farewell before entering the dream still lingered by their side when they woke up.

???: ...You didn't leave.

Kal'tsit: ...No. Since leaving here until now, standing in front of you again—

Kal'tsit: ...I have wandered for tens of thousands of years.

Kal'tsit: ...But, I still haven't forgotten the questions you left me—

Kal'tsit waited, anxious, she needed assurance...

Assurance that her hopes hadn't undergone some terrible change.

???: ...

???: That's not... a question, it's... my hope...

???: ...Then, have you... found the meaning of your life?

"Kal'tsit..."

Kal'tsit: Seeking the meaning of life's continuity—this is still the path I need to continue on in the future.

Kal'tsit: Do you remember...

???: I remember... For me, saying goodbye to you feels like it was just yesterday, yet also as distant as unreal...

???: But for you...

Kal'tsit: Ihave never forgotten the efforts you made for me.

Kal'tsit: Besides life itself, you gave me another precious thing—freedom, Doctor.

???: Or... call me Doctor, Kal'tsit.

Doctor: Let me... leave first...

Kal'tsit: You're still weak, I can help—

Doctor: No need...

Doctor: Kal'tsit, I have... too many doubts.

Doctor: What about Originium... I haven't found any records.

Kal'tsit: ...

Kal'tsit: Originium still grows on the land outside.

Doctor: So I woke up too early.

Kal'tsit: ...

Doctor: You've been through a lot, Kal'tsit.

Doctor: I can tell from your eyes. Do you need my help? Is that why you woke me up?

Kal'tsit: It's not just me who needs your help.

Doctor: Ah. What about the "devil"?

Doctor: On your friend behind you, I not only see Originium existing in unexpected forms...

Doctor: She also possesses... um, the "Civilight Eterna".

Kal'tsit: Nowadays, the trajectory of civilization development is very... complex.

Doctor: What's her name? Do their civilization also have a similar term to refer to their existence?

Kal'tsit: Theresa.

Doctor: The...re...sa...

[mandowifey]

i could always go for some love from an ethan character🫶🏼🫶🏼

my pronouns are she/her, my main hobbies are baking, reading, watching movies (old/classic movies >>>>) & traveling. i’m a mix between an extrovert and an introvert but most of the time i’m perfectly ok with being by myself with a good book or nice movie :) i have a cat who i adore & love more than most people😌

Oooh! Hello Anon! Sorry this took me so long. Also, I fully agree with the cat sentiment.

That being said I assign you...

Ellison Oswalt.

Ellison Oswalt x Fem!Reader

Warnings: General fluff, playful, domestic bliss, and traumas. SFW.

○ ○ ○

"Do you think Clint Eastwood ever got tired of being the same cowboy in every movie?"

You stretch your legs across Ellison's lap, and the man grunts to move his notepad out of the way. He pushed up his glasses and laid his wrists on your shins to use you as a writing table. When he did not answer, you glanced towards him and gently dig your heel into his thigh.

"What?"

"Did you hear me?"

Ellison looks at you in a quizzical manner before looking at the tv. On the screen was grainy old western featuring a handful of deceased actors. One man flashed a revolver at the other, which prompted retaliation, and now everyone in the saloon had their guns drawn. He liked older movies, and they gave him a sense of nostalgia. Another grind of your heel brought his thoughts to the present.

"I think if he did, he wouldn't have done so many to begin with," sighed the older man. "He's good at it. He probably liked the easy money. Plus, it wasn't like Disney existed quite yet. Limited roles, limited options, and redundancy is bound to happen."

Pressing your lips together, you squint at him and look at the tv again. "Wasn't my question," you chirp smartly and lift your left leg to bump your foot under his chin. Reviled, Ellison recoiled and slapped gently at your foot until you laughed and dropped it down to his lap. "I asked if he got tired of being the same character," you said again, smirking as you watched him wrestle to keep your legs down.

Once you settled, Ellison slapped his notepad against your knees and pulled a soft giggle from your throat. "I'm sure he did," he places a large hand on your shin and slips it up over your knee. Goosebumps raise on your skin, and you feel a little warm. "Who wouldn't get bored being the same person over and over? Or he felt obligated to keep doing it because he's good at it. Maybe being that cowboy is the one thing he knows best, maybe..."

There's a pause that lasts a beat too long. His eyes close behind his glasses, and you quickly sit up. "Hey." Your palm cups his cheek and turns his head to face you. "Stop that." Your lips press the corner of his mouth as he sighs through his nose. His hand comes up to take down his glasses before he looks at you with his beryl orbs.

"I love you," your voice was gentle and unassuming. "Bad taste in Western movies or not." His lips twitch, and he fights not to smile. He pulls you suddenly to sit in his lap after abandoning his notepad.

"You do, do yah?" His voice is a purr, the grin stretching his features and accentuating the deep grooves of his face. Those uneven teeth flashing you and making your heart pound. Ellison palms your hips, drawing you impossibly close to him as his pupils blow out with desire.

"I do." You agree finally as you lower your mouth to catch his.

He shifts you both and lays you back while kissing you. The degree in which he's on you is scolding, his hands venturing you like it's the first time all over again. As he does, the Tv drones in the background, gunshots going off like fireworks while your own burst behind your eyelids.

I love you too.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi! I sent an ask before, earlier in the year.

here’s some real ent info about me before I ask my question:

I’m 15. I’ve had my period for a year. My mother and my bio aunt were both (very) late bloomers in that regard, but were never diagnosed with anything that may have caused that. I’ve had ‘crushes’ before, which I suspect may have been me masking because I didn’t actually like anyone. I’ve tried mastrubation before, but it’s never really done anything? I don’t do anything involving penetration (because ouch) but I do other things outside of that, ti absolutely no result.

Okay. Now relevant info out of the way. I have questions now;

Is it possible I’m ace? How does one find that out?

is it possible I’m aro? How does one figure *that* out?

Do you think there’s a reason mastrubation doesn’t work for me? Is that a thing that can be fixed?

Is there a reason why penetration hurts so much for me? Even just my pinky finger or a tampon hurts enough that I cried the first few times I tried (I use pads now and avoid penetration).

is there any important information that I should be given? I’m attending a Catholic school so sex ed is pretty much “literally just don’t do it.”

sorry for the barrage of questions. Thank you so much for running this blog, you have no idea how helpful it is. I’m not 100% sure if I turned on anon properly, so if this isn’t an anon please don’t answer it.

hi anon,

oh boy!! so much to work with here!! a veritable buffet of curiosity

this one wasn't even on your question list but I'll throw it in for free: there's not really any reason to worry about finding a diagnosis for starting your period at 15. while the average age that menstruation begins these days is around 12, anywhere from 10-16 is perfectly normal.

it's completely possible that you're ace and/or aro, because it's possible that anybody could be ace and/or aro. do you want to be? because that's pretty much what it comes down to. would calling yourself asexual or aromantic feel right? would it provide any sense of security or clarity to conceptualize yourself that way? the words don't define what you are; you pick which words you like and want to use to make sense of yourself.

god okay I have no idea how to say this without sounding redundant but if you don't feel good when you're masturbating it's probably because you don't like what you're doing. are you trying to jack off because you're horny and want to touch yourself or because you feel like you're supposed to masturbate? if it's the former then damn, try something else. literally anything, anything and everything can be masturbation if it feels good. get crazy with it. if it's the latter and you're just kind of going through the motions out of a vague sense that you're supposed to be masturbating, knock that shit off and dedicate that time to literally anything else that you enjoy. life is too short.

penetration is probably uncomfortable for the same reason it's uncomfortable for a lot of people our age: lack of practice and CRITICAL lack of lubricant. some people find that using a lube on their tampon applicator can help, but also no one is making you use tampons and if pads are more comfortable you can keep doing that forever. personally I haven't used a tampon since middle school and I'm thriving. invest in some reusable pads; you'll save so much money. penetration is 100% optional literally just living without that shit is fine.

as much as I would love to run an intensive and all-encompassing course on all of human sexuality for you right here right now (and I mean that sincerely, I wish this was the proper platform for that. should I write a book? let me know in the comments), I'll keep the info short: whenever you feel like there's something wrong with you, in any way, really think about what's making you feel that way, and who benefits from you feeling bad about yourself. because 99.9% of the time when people send in asks about something about their sexuality or gender that makes them feel bad, what they tell me about is something completely harmless that's just a little different than the common norm. the norm is nothing; as long as no one is being harmed, you do you.

for more specific questions, I'm literally always on this website answering q's, and I'd also really recommend checking out Dr. Lindsey Doe's youtube channel Sexplanations and the forum Scarleteen, which is run specifically for young people to address questions about sexuality.

[hot-take-tournament]

it's finally time to close the book on this

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT:

SHOWDOWN AT HIGH NOON (#15)

Submissions 8, 24, 28, 33, 88, 98, 213, 261, 272, 280

IS PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA GOOD?

[ALL PROPAGANDA UNDER THE CUT]

Then we never have to talk about this again.

Pre-preliminaries will be used to determine what qualifies as a hot take. Propaganda is encouraged!

Also, remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure! (exposure like when your exposed to deadly radiation)

YES:

(24)

Pinapple [sic] belongs on pizza.

There are many dishes that mix sweet and savory. Cheese and fruit as found on charcuterie boards is a prime example. What else mixes fruit and cheese? That’s right. Pineapple pizza. The salty savoriness of the cheese blends perfectly with the cooked pineapple, which is less tart than raw fruit. Add bacon, canadian bacon, or chicken for extra deliciousness. You either like pineapple on pizza or you’re a coward.

(28)

Pineapple on pizza is not only good, it’s the best pizza topping there is

Sweet and savory is a godly flavor combo. It hits all the notes at once. It provides the acid and the sweetness to an otherwise very heavy dish

(33)

Adding to the last one I sent [about milk before cereal], "pineapple does not belong on pizza" people are also annoying as fuck

I don't even like pineapple but it's the only pizza my best friend will tolerate and I'm tired of people calling her a freak for it

(98)

Pineapple on pizza is fine.

I work in a pizza place & have to see absolutely fucking horrific monstrosities that people call pizza. Here’s a list of things worse than pineapple that I’ve seen on pizza: any topping that people ask for “extra extra” of (like mushrooms or spinach), fish, nacho cheese sauce, & a mix of beans and salsa

(213)

Pineapple on pizza is fine.

It's not mana from heaven or anything but it's not bad either. The flavors balance out pretty well.

(261)

PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA IS AMAZING!!!

it tastes good and pepperoni fans are just mean to us pineapple on pizza likers.

YES, but –

(272)

i like pineapple on pizza. the ham is the problem

listen i can do meat on pizza. but ham AND pineapple? no. something about that feels unholy. so i pick off the ham so i can enjoy my pineapple pizza. also i am allergic to pineapple. but we persevere

(280)

pineapple pizza is good in america

the sweet and savory combination is just… ough. but most native italian people don’t like the idea of pineapple pizza. why? the answer comes in the difference in tomatoes in italy and the united states. in america, tomatoes are very sour and savory, so pineapple can really do a pizza some favors. however, italian tomatoes, while still savory and tart, are very sweet. putting pineapple on an italian pizza would just be redundant.

(8)

I think people need to stop being so angry about Pineapple on Pizza. Weather [sic] you like it or not isn't a big deal

If we're supposed to 'respect other's opinions' then why do pizza toppings need to start a war? It's really pointless.

(oh... um... sorry dude. guess i'm not helping, am i)

NO:

(88)

pineapple on pizza should be outlawed

disgusting. crime against perfectly good pizza.

i’m RIGHT., i will FIGHT YOU, 🍍+🍕= 🚮

(266)

Pineapple should not be on pizza.

Fruit allergiers, particularly pineapple allergies, are steadily on the rise and this topping will legit kill someone if there's not at least some proper storage.

I work in a pizza place, and have been working with pizza for years. There is NO proper storage for pineapple at most pizza places. It comes from a can and the juice gets on every surface. Same with 90% of other toppings.

If you have a friend who is allergic to pineapple, do not recommend pizza for dinner during hang outs. Opt for anything else.

Pineapple should not be on pizza. The hell fruit should stay out of pizza kitchens.

[jess-moloney]

Just to clarify for the very triggered anon I just got:

No, I don't post all the asks I receive, that doesn't make me a liar. The reason I don't post everything is because of the fact that I get so many redundant asks that it would be pointless to respond to 5-6 of the same question with the same information.

Then sometimes I get asks that are so incredibly off topic that there's no reason to post them because this blog isn't about whatever the ask contained.

I also repeatedly get asks about things I've already stated on this blog, or posted on this blog, and quite frankly I don't feel like I want to post about it again when I've already done that and there's a handy dandy little index in my pinned post where you can fine 95% of all my sources.

Just because you send in an ask doesn't mean you are entitled to an answer. If you send an ask with a question that I've already answered (usually multiple times) it's probably going to get deleted because I already answered it.

I'm sorry if you don't understand why this is how I run my blog but ultimately it is up to my own decision if I post an ask and when. This is my blog not your blog. You are not entitled to use it as your platform. If you need your post seen that badly you can make your own blog and post it on your blog.

Also, if you mean I don't post all of the hate anons I get, you're right. I delete the vast majority of those too as I usually find it better not to feed the trolls. Some days I'm in the mood though, or if the hate is particularly bad I do like to use it as an example of how bad the stans are so people can see what's going on behind the scenes.

Anyway, I hope everyone understands this policy of mine and if you don't you are very free not to follow and read my blog, or send asks. Thank you.