#Sorta? Implications n stuff

[therantingsage]

"....look, I know you don't believe me. But they want to meet you officially?" You say.

Loop's eyes crinkle in some kind of skepticism. "Do they, now?"

You nod.

A half-laugh, fake-sounding. "And what would that entail, exactly?"

You frown a little. "Well. I mean, they can control my body? So they can talk for me? Say hi?"

You hear Mira enthusiastically volunteer, which you expected to be honest. She was probably the best one of them for Loop to meet first. She was polite and non-threatening in most circumstances.

Loop looks you over. "Honestly. I don't really see the point. I don't really need to meet any of them, it's not like they matter to this situation." But they raise their hands in surrender, anyway. "But if it gets you to drop this, I'll humor you, Stardust. Send them in, or whatever!"

The more time that passes, the more frustrated you get with their continued disregard and disdain for your family. It hurts. It hurt before they hitched a ride in your brain, and it surely hurts more now, that they're all here to hear them say it.

Nonetheless, you pass the reigns to Mira.

It feels so weird, every time they do this. You have to fight the impulse to take back control of your limbs, because muscle memory and common sense dictate that your limbs moving on their own was not a good thing in the slightest. But the more you let them do it, the more used to the sensation you become. The easier it becomes to just....let go.

And still. When your mouth opens, your voice but her diction, it still feels alien. "Hello!" She greets. "I'm Mirabelle, but you...kn-know that already. Or maybe you don't, they didn't tell you who was coming out to greet you. I, I wanted to thank you, for being there for Siffrin when we weren't. We were so scared when we learned what he was going through. If he'd been alone....I-I don't even want to think about it."

She extends your hand towards them, and you feel your mouth curve up in a smile. "So it's very nice to meet you! We'd be honored to get to know you as well as they do!"

Loop's eyes dart, between your face and your outstretched hand, but they don't move a muscle. They don't move for a long, long while, even. Completely silent, and stone-faced.

And then they steeple their hands, something dark in their expression. Darker than you'd ever seen on them, really. "I've changed my mind, Stardust! I have absolutely no interest in continuing to play this game with you!"

Mira speaks for you again. "I-it's not a game, we're really here-"

"Really, stop being deluded, Stardust! I mean it! I'm not going to keep encouraging this behavior in you! I've already done it enough, clearly!" Their eyes widen a little. Too wide.

On reflex you steal back control of your body, shoving Mira back into the back. Something about Loop's expression frightens you. Something in it like mania, or a hysterical smile. You aren't sure how you can even tell without a mouth to judge. You just...can.

"Loop-"

"I'm only going to say this one more time, alright? So commit it to memory, since you've clearly got enough space in that head of yours to fabricate four whole other personalities~"

Like every other helpful tip message they give, the words superimpose themselves into your mind. You feel your family flinch from the sheer volume of them.

[Every time you talk to me about the family in your head, I will not give you any aid for the rest of that loop! I'm not getting paid for this, so I'd appreciate you taking my time seriously!]

You

breathe in.

You breathe out. "Fine. I understand." You stand from the root, and walk away without another word.

Loop huffs. You ignore them.

You've got four other people helping you figure this out, anyway.

[ambrosialdesire]

bloodsports

[ PART ONE ] [ PART TWO ]

18+ DARK CONTENT BELOW, MINORS AND BLANK BLOGS DNI

pairing: modern au!reiner x fem!reader word count: 13.6k warnings + tags: general yandere and obsessive themes, explicit sexual content, unhealthy relationships, misogyny, public humiliation mentions, sorta an unbalanced power dynamic, a/b/o dynamics and themes, modern & college/university au, alpha & hockey player jock reiner (will be sorta ooc but ig you can count it as his s1-3 soldier persona), omega reader, enemies to sorta friends to enemies again to lovers (but both reiner and reader are stubborn dumdums and it's sorta one-sided), bertolt x reader implications, heavy jealousy/possessive themes, heavy self-sabotage, alcohol consumption, violence & blood warning, "fated" mates, usage of suppressants, unwarranted scenting, kinda scenting kink?, pheromone-bombing, size difference, size kink, noncon kissing, all characters are 18+ synopsis: trying to get through uni should've been easy, but presenting as an omega made you become a seemingly easy target for the many disgusting alphas that roamed the campus. no matter how much suppressants you took, you unfortunately just had to grab the attention of the most notorious one out there. the university's famed center in ice hockey, reiner braun. to you, he was nothing but a godforsaken, meatheaded annoyance. a/n: i am not one of god's strongest when comes to a/b/o or the omegaverse LMFAOO LIKE I CAN'T DENY IT, SUMN ABOUT IT MAKES ME GO ABSOLUTELY FERAL AND IDC WHAT OTHERS THINK 👺👺 anywaysss, yea it's another hatefuck reiner fic that i decided recently to make a two parter LOL i made reiner a hockey player because i kinda like hockey more (i watched one game irl with my sibling and it was hella cool even tho the team we were cheering for lost 💀 the state pride was crazy, i had no idea how irritating it was hearing the other team fans cheer 😭) but i'm really really new to the sport so forgive me if i make some mistakes about it lol (i did modify it a little so it can be more dramatic and violent lol) happy valentine's day (ik this late AFFFFF LMFAO) and hope you guys enjoy this! the second part will hopefully come not too far behind, maybe in december once i'm freed from school haha note: please keep in mind of the tags above and do not proceed if triggering or uncomfortable, especially if you are a minor!! do not read my or any other writers' dark content if you are underaged. this is a fictional work and does not reflect irl morals, do not believe this is how a real romance works or functions.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.───

"You're coming to my game, right?"

The sudden weight on the table of someone leaning upon it on the other side caused it to creak, but you didn't have to look up to know who it was. The wafting smell of warm, spiced vanilla with vague, yet noticeable earthy tones wrapped around you like a familiar heated blanket. No matter how nice it smelled, it only bubbled irritation within you. You continued writing your notes, ignoring the looming presence.

"Omega, answer and look at me." A chill ran down your spine and your head felt heavy once he spoke, the demand stern and clear. You didn't want to answer him, but your secondary gender was scratching at your brain like a persistent fly. Answer him, answer your alpha.

You stubbornly pinched your leg once to get yourself out of it before finally looking up at the man himself, narrowing your eyes at him.

"Can't. Have finals tomorrow. Also, don't ever do that shit to me or call me that."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, already knowing he wasn't going to take that as an answer. "You weren't answering me and c'mon, it's only for a few hours babe. Who wouldn't come to their alpha's big game today?"

"Me because you're not my alpha and I'm not your babe. Go find some other omega that drools over you because this one isn't going." You grumbled as you stood up, beginning to collect your stuff to get back to your dorm. He grabbed your wrist before you got your notebook, pulling you towards him, eyes were gleaming with determination.

"Come to my game and I won't bother you anymore. I promise."

You pulled your arm out of his grasp with a frown, quickly debating in your mind. Could you trust him?

On one hand, it would be nice to not get disturbed by him anymore. But on the other, that means you have to be packed in a stadium with sweaty alphas and a handful of excitable betas and omegas for an hour or two. The smell would be awful and overwhelming, false ruts and heats would get triggered easily from the adrenaline. You didn't even like ice hockey or any sport in general, too many alphas dominated the industry.

You bit back a heavy sigh, finally deciding on your answer.

"Ugh. I'm holding you to that promise then Reiner. No randomly showing up at my dorm, no waiting for me at the end of my classes, don't have your friends try and check up on me for your behalf either. Got it?" His hazel eyes lit up immediately and he nodded, his smile wide.

"You got it babe, I'll pick you up at 6."

You were about to tell him off about the pet name but he ran off, whooping in the quiet library while slamming the doors open. A few of the students' and staffs' glares went over to you, causing you to grimace before finally picking up your notebook. What the fuck have you gotten yourself into?

Life wasn't like this before. For a year and half, you've had an alpha cling onto your every move as if you've claimed one another. It may seem like that to him but you definitely didn't want anything to do with him. All Reiner did was bring a mix of trouble to you, a burden that you never wanted. Your secondary gender was supposed to be a hidden secret for only yourself to know — the prescribed supplements made sure of that — and you were supposed to present as a beta in order to live a peaceful university life. How painfully frustrating it was to be found out from a simple error in your day-to-day routine.

You were in a rush, you're human after all, and forgot to take them before you left your dorm. It wasn't until you entered your class when a brick of strong smells bitterly hit your nose, something that never happened before. One day and that's all it took for everyone's eyes to latch onto your frame, the horrifying hunger glimmering in the darks of their pupils.

You froze, unable to move from the doorway. The vileness of their stench rang alarms in your head, they were all sour and distasteful with every short whiff you took. It was overwhelming, heavy, and nauseating. You knew what they were all thinking, internally debating whether you should run back to your dorm or transfer.

A large arm had made its way around your shoulders, pulling you closer to their body. You panicked at first until a whiff of something sweet in the air stopped you. A spiced vanilla enveloped your senses with every breath you took and like a switch, your body immediately calmed down, unintentionally leaning closer to them to continue feeling this sweet relief.

"Hey." You tilted your head up at the person who was currently holding you by the neck and felt dread quickly fill up your stomach once more.

Reiner Braun, one of the most notorious womanizers on campus and the university's proclaimed players in ice hockey.

Reiner Braun, smelling like a freshly baked pastry, slinging his arm around you while unintentionally managing to bring you back to your senses.

Reiner Braun, whose face is suddenly way too close and you could just barely feel the brush of his lips against yours.

Your face burned up at the realization and you shoved him off you, eyes wide and mouth parted open in shock as you watched him stumble back to reality. What the fuck just happened and why the fuck did he smell so good out of everyone here? He looked like he was appalled by what he did as well but recovered faster than you did, a sly smirk growing on his face.

"Hey omega, just a head's up. The next time you come to class, don't smell like a sweet treat for us alphas alright?"

You thought you couldn't burn up even more than before, your body beginning to tremble in complete rage and mortification as the students began to howl in amusement. All of your emotions were pumping through your system all at once way too quickly and you finally ran out of the class, tears brimming on the edges of your eyes. There was no way you could handle being in there for another second. The boisterous laughter faded away in your eardrums and once you got far enough from prying eyes and ears, you collapsed to the ground and nearly sobbed your heart out.

You knew attending this university would be difficult but never in your life did you think you'd be humiliated in this way, just for one stupid little mistake. To alphas, any mistake that wasn't from their pretentious clique meant your life, your downfall, everything. It becomes a weakness to exploit and use, like a deer with a broken leg completely surrounded by a pack of starving wolves.

All you could think about over and over as you finally made it to your dorm was:

Fuck Reiner Braun.

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

After that day, you made sure to take your supplements on time with an alarm. Regardless of that, you still felt skittish once you stepped foot in that damn class again. Not because of the possibility that the knowing glances of your classmates would come your way, but the fact that Reiner would not leave you alone ever since he embarrassed you.

When you finally went back to that class in the next lecture, you placed yourself all the way in the back corner than your usual spot, trying to hide yourself away until everyone forgot about the incident. It seemed that your humiliating moment had faded away quickly like a passing breeze since no one looked your way as the seats began to fill up one by one. It was not until you heard the familiar laugh of him, only then you started getting nervous.

You stared down in your notebook, trying to look as busy as possible but the shuffle of a heavy bag and a body sitting down next to you in the loudest way possible confirmed your worst suspicions.

"Good thing you saved a seat for me, that’s so nice of you omega." Reiner congratulated you in a false manner and you grimaced, turning your head towards him. He wasn't looking at you but he was smiling as he looked to the front of the room. You had to force yourself not to stare at his body, which was a mental battle in itself when his pheromones were as strong as ever.

He most likely exercised before coming here, a faint sweat stain on the chest of his white cut-off tank top confirming your thoughts. The tank top was hiding little to the imagination, loose enough to where you can see his sculpted muscles from the side but tight enough to where it accentuated his chest. He was manspreading — a common occurrence in those who were considered to be extremely prideful alphas — and wearing dark gray sweatpants.

You didn't mean to but your gaze slightly wandered a little more down, heart nearly stopped in your chest when you just barely spotted the faint outline of his half-hard cock against the fabric. He was... big and if that was him barely aroused, wow. You'd pray for those that let this son-of-a-bitch hit another time.

The usually dormant annoyance in your brain wanted to get down on her knees and suck him off till he got hard in her mouth, but you had to viciously fight her back into the deep crevices of your mind. You don't know why the urge was so strong, the meds you took usually gave you no sexual desires towards anyone. Maybe you need to up the dosage? You'd have to make a doctor's appointment soon because you don't know if you could stand this new disgusting pervert inside you.

It would be the coldest day in Hell if you ever let Reiner fuck you.

"I have a name, use it or fuck off." You turned back to your notebook and he chuckled in amusement.

"You got a bite now omega? Where was she the last time we spoke?"

"Maybe she would've been there if she wasn't on the verge of a breakdown. Fucking asshole." You muttered the last bit, starting to ignore him once the professor finally entered the class. Cracking your knuckles and opening your laptop to the latest powerpoint, you began writing down the important points of what was in the week's module. It took you nearly half of the three hour long lecture to notice that he didn't make any sound, no writing or keyboard clacking or any tapping from his phone. Your peripherals just barely caught the sight of him and your skin ran cold.

Reiner wasn't paying attention to the lecture. You started to practically feel the absolute intensity of his stare, burning two deep holes into the side of your face. The chair lightly squeaked as he suddenly moved closer to you, the audible sound of him sniffing at you came after.

What the fuck was his problem? You quickly inched yourself away from him, backing into the wall but he followed suit almost immediately. His large frame nearly engulfed yours, the sheer heat of his body radiating off as he neared you.

He sniffed once above your head, then again and again as if he was searching for something. Thank God you decided to shower this morning. The tense atmosphere between the two of you grew thicker with each passing second until his hazel eyes narrowed, the corner of his mouth twitched in faint irritation.

"...You don't smell like anything." Reiner sourly muttered before pulling away, giving back the needed space.

"Uh... yeah? I got back on track with my meds." What was up with him? Reiner had never once spoken to you before the incident, in the class and out of it. In this class in particular, you've usually seen him on his phone, napping, or quietly chatting with the nearest poor soul.

He's known to not fool around with your kind, back when you were still portraying yourself as a beta. Why would he? To them, betas were boring and basic. They weren't alpha enough to be considered to be one of them and not omega enough to fuck. His preferences were pretty out there in whispers and giggles too, so it's not like he would need a reason to talk to you unless it was to get his dick wet for the night. That seemed to be the plan in mind since he was continuously interacting with you.

"Why would you?" Reiner nonchalantly questioned, as if he wasn't the one of the reasons why you take such heavy supplements. Your eye twitched, your fingers tightening around your pen.

"Are you seriously asking me that?" You scowled, watching him shrug and lean back onto the chair.

"Yeah, why not? You're the first omega I've met with a scent that's not doused in cheaply made perfume, it's..." He stopped, thinking of the right words before finally settling on one. "Original."

You scrunched your nose, conflicted with what he just described. He is the talk of the campus, most if not all omegas would've loved to be marked by him; no wonder they try to court him with different concoctions. Then again, he could just be saying that to get into your pants. Original, ha! If he liked this so-called originality, he should find it in someone else.

"I'm not interested y'know, not after what you did last time."

After you said that, all the words seemed to die in his mouth. He became quiet for the rest of the lecture and you didn't have the courage to look back up to see his expression. The silence was a simmering awkwardness, and you could only try and listen to the professor as much as you could. His smell was now twisted with a dullness to it, almost bland and distasteful like the rest of the room. When the lesson finally ended, you started to zip your bag close and pull it through your arms, until his hand grabbed the strap and lifted it up onto his own shoulder.

"What do you think you're doing?" Panic bubbled in your chest as you tried to grab it back but he kept maneuvering out of your reach, a playful smile growing on his lips.

"Think of this as an apology to you omega. I'll walk you to your next class." Your heart dropped to your stomach, the last thing you needed was even more people staring at you, especially with the campus fuckboy in tow.

"You really don't have to and don't call me that." Reiner snorted as he walked down the stairs, you having no choice but to follow him.

"What else can I call you if you haven't told me your name yet?" He held the door open for you, readjusting the bags he was holding. You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms.

"Why offer to walk me to my next class when I don't even know your name?" It was a lie, of course everyone knew him just by the simple utter of his name, but he laughed at your simple comeback, genuinely laughed. It didn't sound like it did when he poked fun of you that one day, your face starting to lightly flush warm.

"Fair enough. Name's Reiner, Reiner Braun. One of the University of Marley Warriors centers." You slightly cringed at the title, he just had to add that fact in. Oh well, might as well play along just a little.

"Y/N L/N, one of the many second year students in the University of Marley."

He laughed once more and nudged you on the back with his elbow, letting you take the lead.

"You're a funny girl Y/N."

You had to ignore the way your stomach fluttered from the way he said it, picking up your pace. Remember, you had to remember that he caused you a turmoil of anguish for a near week. All you were going to give him was this moment and that's it.

"Thanks."

Now that you think back on it, how silly it was for you to think that this was the last time he was ever going to talk to you.

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

There wasn't a minute in your day where Reiner wasn't in your presence.

Nearly every day for roughly five or six months since you've started talking to one another, he'd manage to find you and socialize. He'd give you a small snack or drink too, ruffling your hair once you took it from his hand and sitting down in the seat next to you. Every day was a different topic that he asked, ranging from simple questions to a little more personal ones. You knew he was trying to pry whenever you didn’t say much about yourself so you've revealed only a few tidbits, nothing big. Sometimes he needed studying help and you didn't mind tutoring him about the subjects you were sorta knowledgeable in. He always seemed so interested and focused in whatever you say, so hey, at least he was a decent listener.

He started rejecting hang-outs with his friends and teammates, all to simply talk to you. It's crazy how often he did it, a few times occurring in front of you through phone calls. He'd only mentioned his teammates when he tried to invite you to numerous practices, implying that he wanted them to meet you. You turned him down about it for the first few times, creating excuses to not go, until you got tired of him asking and finally begrudgingly agreed.

Watching him practice made you realize one thing about him: Reiner loved to play dirty.

Of course since you were merely a new bystander of the sport, it might've been one of the core strategies of how to win in hockey. Yet the more you observed, the more you noticed how he treated everyone on the ice, friend or foe. He told you before that centers did a lot for their team and were known to be more on the offense, even when defending. You thought the role was perfect for him, considering how he started this whole "friendship" thing with you. However, the way he treated you was nothing compared to how he treated the sport.

It was like watching an illegal cage fight from the way he quickly sped towards the puck, viciously slamming into others to make way. A frightening sight indeed, maybe even more for the ones on the ice as they were the ones he barreled his shoulders into their chests and sides. You can't remember how many times you flinched watching an unfortunate player get rammed into the plastic barrier by Reiner, the heavy sound echoing throughout the stadium. Everyone on the opposing team was merely his punching bag and though they can get a few hits in, you could tell that they couldn't handle the constant confrontations. He didn't care that they were still his teammates and that this was merely a practice game. To lose is to lose and for an alpha, that could never be an option.

You never told him this, but you never liked the look in his eyes that he gets whenever he played, the darks of his pupils blowing out the once-warm hazel color with a carnal and exhilarated intensity within them.

Regardless of his violent attitude, Reiner genuinely worked well with his team, whomever was on his side at least. He especially got along with whoever jersey number 60 is — the only hint being that his last name is Hoover — and who was noticeably taller than anyone else on the team. The two were extremely compatible, making the smoothest passes that whenever you blinked, it would seem that the other had the puck in the first place.

The strangest part of it all was that he'd make you wear his jersey afterwards, that's also somewhat the reason why you stopped coming over to his practices besides the extreme harshness of the sport. It was way too intimate for him to be sharing a highly scented object to a friend but you've tried refusing, saying that you hated the stink and it was still wet with sweat. Reiner never really cared about what you said about it and pulled it over your head, the fabric hanging loosely mid-thigh. You hated how calm it made you feel and how every time he asked for it back, you'd hesitate.

Even if he did like you, you don't know why he was being overly friendly. Was it because you were an omega that he had to be nice to you? You tried not to think about it like that since you were slowly getting used to his presence, as if he became a part of your routine.

He never pushed anything sexual onto you either like you originally thought he was going to. Sure, he'd make a weird comment or joke here or there but it never really made you uncomfortable or escalated into something else. Your feelings towards him simmered down to a level of neutrality, not quite at peace from what he did but not as angry as before. Did he feel bad for his actions? He never really said an actual apology to you, but is that really why you still find him aggravating to be around with?

"You're such a study bug, don't you know how to have a little fun?" Reiner skimmed his fingers against the already-read pages, your bodies squished side-by-side, one of his arms wrapped loosely around your waist as the two of you read your textbook together. You don't know why or when but you started to not mind the physical contact with him anymore; you chalked it up to it being the winter months and you were cold as hell, he was basically the closest thing to a portable heater. Your physician upped the dosage of your meds as well and there was a noticeable difference, but it didn't seem to deter the thoughts you were having about Reiner. They probably would’ve faded away if not for his constant presence.

"I don't have time for fun, unlike you with your full-ride and sports." You muttered as you flipped the page, eyes skimming over the new paragraphs. He groaned and rested his head on top of yours, taking in a deep breath. You’ve noticed that he was more touchier with you compared to his other friends that you once watched from afar before, but you’ve gotten used to it for the past few months.

He was silent for a few pages until you could feel his fingers trail up against your scent gland, your body immediately freezing up. He shouldn’t be touching you there, a shiver going up your spine as you felt his fingertips rub light circles around it. You couldn’t stop him, not when your brain was currently being scrambled with the feeling.

"Your smell is still not there." He off-handily murmured, finally removing his hand from your neck and letting you collect your thoughts again.

You swallowed thickly, trying to clear your throat. "I think you forget that I take heavy suppressants."

"Why do you? Do you really not want to fuck anyone any time soon?" You cringed at his wording, meeting his eyes.

"Well yeah, pretty much. I want to focus on school, not constantly wonder if I'm going to suddenly go into heat around an alpha. And it's a guaranteed protection, I don't want to get accidentally marked this early in my life." You could feel his hand squeeze and knead at the meat of your hip, knowing that he was in thought.

"I don't know if our class remembers what sub-gender I am but you certainly do, you were literally in trance when you met me," You pointed out, feeling your skin prickle warm as you thought back on the memory. "And it was my mistake, I didn't mean to get off of them and do that to you. I'm pretty much protecting myself and others from doing something... irrational."

What he didn't know is that having no heat at all for months at a time had made you indescribably horny, but you've been managing it so well that you really didn't need any outside assistance at all. Him being the only alpha that hangs around you on a day-to-day basis and consistently touching you has not made the thoughts any better than they were before, but you forced those damn heinous ideas in the back of your mind every time. Bothersome they were and you tried to not let it get to you as much as possible.

Reiner nodded slowly, closing his eyes. "Well if you do get into a heat, I'm available for use."

You gasped, quickly jabbing your elbow into his side, causing him to flinch from the feeling and laugh almost aloud in the quiet library. "God, don't say that here!"

"It's true! There's a line-up of omegas that need help through their heats, I'm not the only one that's getting something out of it. They need a knot and I give it to them." You don't know why but hearing him admit that made you almost freeze and feel your stomach drop. Every time you're reminded of his reputation, something in you twists in an unpleasant way. It's strange. You have no reason to feel this way when you don't even like him in any romantic sense.

"I'd rather not hear about your many conquests, thank you very much." His eyes connected to yours and you tried not to pull away, trying not to feign anything that would give you up.

"Don't tell me... You're jealous, aren't you?" He teased as his grin grew wider and you scoffed, closing the textbook almost a little too hard.

"Please, as if! I'm not the one here insinuating into starting something." You huffed and tried to disconnect your body from his to put the book away but he didn't let you, his arm holding you around the crook of your back firmly.

"I never mark them, if that makes you feel better. No matter how much they beg me to, I don't. I'm pretty good at controlling myself."

You paused, the heavy stone in your stomach still dragging you down. He sounded honest about it and any omega that he marked would've bragged about it for years to come. Hell, you wouldn't even be as close as you were with him right now if that was the case. Yet, the admission didn't make you feel any better and you'd rather not praise him for something so bare minimum.

"...I really, really don't care Reiner. You can fuck anyone you want silly and it's none of my business. I'm not your mate and you're not mine." His eyes softened, looking at you so fondly that you almost wanted to take back every word you had just said.

"We could be."

Time stopped. The way he said it so nonchalantly made you feel absolutely breathless, like you were punched so deeply in the gut. You so desperately wanted to kiss him in that moment — say fuck it, why not be his mate for the rest of your lives — but that was nothing but the godforsaken omega in you talking. This wasn't some cheesy romcom movie, this was real life. Why in the world would he think there was a possibility that he’d be your mate? The two of you barely knew each other besides the light-hearted chats you’ve had together, he only liked your presence because like every other omega, you were easy.

No matter how long you stayed up at night thinking about him or how much you desired pressing your body against his at all times, you would not sacrifice your future for him. You were trying to be more than just your sub-gender and more than solely becoming an alpha’s eventual trophy wife. Being with him would only complicate things. There was nothing he could do or say would change your perspective.

As you stood up with your stuff, you told him as firmly as you were able to make it without your voice wavering.

"No, we couldn't."

It felt like it was you trying to convince yourself otherwise.

You’d do anything to not be the one watching his heart break right in front of your eyes, his mood changing almost immediately. He tried to look away from you but you saw the deep disappointment reflecting in his irises. The softness they once held hardened up once he realized what he was feeling, trying hard to swallow back the pain. The change of his smell washed over you in waves, a cold melancholy hitting the back of your throat while a burning anger bit at the pit of your stomach at the same time. It wasn't like him to be so distraught with a simple rejection, maybe you were the first one that didn't immediately fall for his charms.

Maybe, just maybe... it should've been you that had gotten rejected instead. Perhaps it would've made you feel less awful about it.

"Yeah, sorry. I… I don’t even know why I said that. Why would I even choose yo— No. Wait. Fuck, I—" Reiner cleared his throat quickly and stood up himself, ready to get out of the situation he put himself in. He was backpedaling, you knew he was, but it didn’t make you or him feel any better about the situation. He really was not used to rejection, huh?

"Let's... let's forget all that. There’s a party going on in Delta Kappa Theta tonight. If you want to come, come. I don’t want you to keep preventing yourself from having fun." The way he still cared about you first made you feel like you were the complete piece of shit here. No matter what though, you didn’t owe him a relationship or situationship or whatever you two have.

You partially nodded anyways, a squeak of an ‘okay’ barely escaping you as you watched him walk away. Every step that he took made you feel even less sure about what you just did, but it was for the best… right?

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

It was the first frat party you’ve ever been to and as you approached the house, you knew that it was going to be way out of your comfort zone. You wanted to go back to your safe and warm dorm, make up an excuse to go to bed early, but Reiner was right, you shouldn't be cooping yourself up for so long without any other interaction besides him. You slowly took in a deep breath, tugging at the seams of your jacket before entering the house, music blaring in your ears and bright lights hitting your eyes as soon as you opened the door.

Find Reiner, find him. Your omega begged you as you shuffled through drunk and dancing bodies, but you ignored it. Would he even want to see you after you rejected him?

Someone tapped you on the shoulder and you turned towards the person, eyes wide with shock.

"Sorry! Didn't mean to scare you," Another alpha, his clean rain-like scent faint from the amount of alcohol in the air. He was extremely tall but folded his body within himself while holding a red solo cup, and his black hair was in desperate need of a new haircut, nearly covering the tops of his eyes. The man didn't seem to present himself like an alpha, his demeanor certainly different to the ones you've met and seen before. "You smelled like my friend and the lights are way too bright so I thought you were him, so sorry again."

He looked vaguely familiar but it seemed that he recognized you first, his mouth suddenly agape. "Wait. Aren't you the girl that Reiner keeps talking about? Uh... sorry. What was your name again?"

"Y/N, nice to meet you. Reiner... mentioned me?"

He kindly smiled and nodded, holding out his hand for you to shake. "Bertolt and you have no idea. You're basically all he wants to talk about recently."

It felt like your heart skipped a beat, butterflies fluttering around in your stomach. You really had that much of an effect on him? You felt partially proud that you, a complete nobody, managed to get him head over heels for you. The other part felt horrible, you didn't mean to lead him on like that to the point where he started bringing you up to his friends. It seemed that Bertolt realized what he said was causing you to get upset, pulling you towards the kitchen.

He quickly scooped up some liquid from a punchbowl and poured it into a new cup, handing it over to you. "Here. A drink might make you feel better."

You weren't new to drinking, only having it a few times casually here and there so you took a quick sip, a smooth burn going down your throat. You coughed lightly and shook your head, hearing him chuckle. He leaned against the countertop beside you, swirling around the cup in his hand.

"Bertolt?" You hated how small you sounded, trailing your fingertips against the ridges of the plastic cup.

"Hm?" He started to take another sip out of his drink, raising it up above his head.

"I don't know if he told you this already but I rejected him this afternoon." The sound of him choking and hacking followed suit immediately after you confessed, a spew of apologies running out of your mouth as you patted his back to get it all out. He definitely didn't tell him yet.

Once he managed to finally stop clearing his throat, he wiped his mouth and turned towards you, eyes wide. "Why did you?"

You bit the inside of your cheek and took another quick sip. "I told him that I wasn't looking for a romantic relationship or sex, all I want to do is focus on is passing my classes and graduating. That's the complete and honest truth."

His friend stayed quiet for a bit until he nodded once, as if he understood your reasoning.

"That's fair, you should be able to pursue what you want to do for your life instead of tending to his needs. It's hard out there for omegas and it's great that you're doing more for yourself. I know Reiner really does actually like you, but you don't have to pursue anything with him if you don't want to. You control what you get to do."

You felt flushed from both the alcohol and his words, you've never met an alpha that shared such a considerably controversial opinion before. You quietly thanked him, watching him tilt his head up towards the ceiling, sighing softly.

"Reiner... I've known Reiner since middle school and fuck, he has his moments where he tends to be a shitty guy, even long before he presented as an alpha. He's stubborn as hell and rarely listens to us and he's occasionally a great guy to be teamed up with, but inside, I know he's just trying to figure himself out."

"What do you mean?" He flinched, beginning to sweat bullets as he nervously fidgeted next to you.

"A-ah, sorry. I don't know if I should be telling you this since you're also his friend but," His pale eyes darted side-to-side, as if he was making sure that no one was listening. "Every omega he's been with, he calls all of them 'practice' for his fated mate. Everyone knows that having a fated mate is super, super rare but since he met you, well..."

He nervously tugged at the hem of his shirt but you immediately knew what he was saying.

"No." You awkwardly started laughing, shaking your head quickly. The house immediately felt even more stuffy and overbearing, a nauseating feeling overcoming you all of a sudden. Omegas being used as practice? Were you just another practice target if the relationship didn't work out?

"N-no, he doesn't seriously think that I'm his fated mate?"

Bertolt sharply inhaled through his teeth, eyes locked to the ground. "Reiner was always hopeful he'd find his second half and you've been the only omega he speaks so positively and constantly about. He mentioned the day you guys met, how your pheromones enticed him so much that he nearly kissed you and he wanted nothing more but to have you as his mate after that. Ugh, sorry. Even saying it out loud makes me feel gross."

You felt sick, numb. Were you even friends from the start or was all of his actions just some kind of courting method? You could barely hear yourself tell Bertolt that you had to go, fumbling a goodbye and an apology to him before pushing yourself into the crowd. The sea of people felt like it was getting more impossible to navigate the more you moved in it, a tight feeling building in your chest from being overwhelmed by every little smell and sound all around you.

Get out.

Get out.

GET OUT.

When you finally managed to push through and find the front door, your blood ran cold immediately. Like a deer frozen in front of oncoming headlights, you couldn't believe what you were staring at. Every part of your body screamed in complete anguish and devastation but you couldn't move. You had no right to, but you couldn't stop your tears from rapidly falling down your cheeks.

Reiner Braun, sitting down on the couch with some stranger on his lap, tracing his hands down their back, and pulling them closer to his body.

Reiner Braun, kissing down their neck, the peaks of his canines just barely scraping against their scent gland.

Reiner Braun, basically publicly grinding himself against this willing participant of his.

His eyes opened half-lidded and in some cruel form of fate, locked onto yours. Out of everyone in the room, he managed to find yours. He pulled away from the omega, a strand of drool still connecting between them. His hand still rested comfortably on the curve of their back, his mouth uttering only one name with wide eyes.

"Y/N...?"

All you could think as you finally snapped out of it — running out of the fraternity until your lungs felt like they were being ripped to shreds — was how bad you felt for that omega. How they were only going to be reduced into something so demeaning, a dummy-run to find his perfect mate. They didn't deserve that, being wide-eyed and hopeful that because he decided to choose them for his lustful pursuits, they're finally worthy of being a candidate of his.

You sobbed aloud as you washed and scrubbed your body red once you reached your dorm, trying to erase every scent and touch he made for the past couple of months. He was nothing more but absolute filth and you fell for it like a fool, a stupid brainless omega. You thought you were better than that but no, you were just like the rest of them. Even if you were his so-called fated mate, why did he continue to seek out others? Wouldn't he have tried to abstain? Sure, you shouldn't have expected that much out of him considering that you didn't even accept his confession but for some reason, it still hurt.

Fuck Reiner Braun. You should've never forgotten that in the first place.

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

Now you were here, leaving the messy history of the second year behind and now moving onto your third. Always look to the future, as they say. You took a lot of preventatives in avoiding seeing Reiner, the plan nearly as extensive as your studying.

You blocked his number once he started to keep calling over and over again ever since the party, blocking the new ones that came every so often and changing your number once you couldn't take it anymore. There was no reason for you to hear his explanation, it's his business on who he decides to fuck and you shouldn't be mad about it anymore. Part of you was afraid that if you hear him explain himself, you'd run right back to him just like every other omega he had a finger wrapped around.

You stopped frequenting areas you used to hang around in, which was unfortunate since some of those places were your favorites. You moved dorms, avoided places he frequented, and made sure he wasn't in any of your classes. Your majors were luckily too different to be in the same buildings or rooms, and with the help of Bertolt, you were always one step ahead of him.

He was the one that approached you first in one of your classes together at the start of the new semester and taught you the ways in how to avoid meeting up with him. You didn't know why his best friend wanted to help you and once asked him, getting the answer that Reiner hasn't been himself recently and he was afraid that he might do something rash if he managed to find you.

"You have so much ahead of you, I’d hate to see Reiner make you throw it away."

Bertolt made sure that he wasn't seen with you whenever the two of you hung out, and when he was with him, he made sure to steer clear of your direction with a simple text. He had to bathe immediately after just in case your scent got on him, which should be nonexistent but he was afraid that if there was just the vaguest trace on him, Reiner would hound him about it. He basically became your bodyguard whenever it was possible for him to do so, and you didn't even ask. You've never felt so grateful meeting someone like him before.

He also brought up that Reiner's been playing more rougher than usual, and snapping at others even when they're on his side of the team exercises. Even the coach was too afraid to say anything about his behavior, relying on him and a few others that were friends with him to talk to him about it.

"It sounds like he's in a pre-rut." You mentioned, handing over the pickles from your sandwich over to him. He took them with an open palm and threw them into his mouth like chips.

"I hope not, his scent smells the same so far but he rarely gets into ruts for me to really know what he smells like. Plus, he never knows how to handle them well."

"Reiner doesn't choose any of the omegas he messes around with for his ruts?" Bertolt shook his head, swallowing.

"Not at all. It's weird, he may mess around with them during their heats but he never, ever lets them in when he's going through a rut. Think it has something to do with the fated mate mentality he has, but sometimes we don't even know he was ever in one until they're over, he basically disappears for a week or so."

It’s funny in a weird way. The two of you were hiding each other from behind Reiner’s back as if the two of you were dating. Even though the two of you became close, your relationship with him was nothing romantic. Some kind of bro-code would've been broken between Reiner and Bertolt if you started dating him, and you'd be eating your own words from what you've said to Reiner. Then again, you never wanted to date him and tolerated his looming, clingy presence on most days.

Bertolt told you that he liked someone but was too afraid to make any move. She was another alpha and one of his friends, so the pairing itself had its controversies. He kept saying that his confession might ruin what they had for years and he was satisfied being in her shadow. It was sad to hear him put himself in second place for her happiness. So you tried doing a little nudge for him to go for it — 'the worst she can say is no' kind of talk — because it was better for him to say something than nothing at all and still quietly pine for her. Bertolt got too excited and rushed in with the confession after one of his practices without your knowledge, a messy bouquet of roses tightly gripped in his hand.

There was a few word texts that he sent to you after the whole ordeal:

Didn't get accepted.

Heartbroken.

Bar.

You found him standing in front of your dormitory building waiting for you, awkward looks of both omegas and betas glancing at him. As you approached him, he took a few steps towards you and almost collapsed in your arms as you held them outstretched. His tears and snot quickly dampened your jacket, his body wracking out heaves of anguish. There wasn't an alpha in the world that you've seen so vulnerable before, his fists gripping your clothes tightly as he shook in sadness.

He started telling you what had happened once he somewhat composed himself, his voice weak and crackly as the two of you walked to his chosen bar. Unfortunately, she turned him down and told him that she was actually interested in some beta from Paradis Tech named Armin. You could only imagine the bouquet dropping to the floor in dramatic fashion, tears welling up in poor Bertolt's eyes. She apologized and somewhat comforted him by saying that his confession won't change anything between their friendship. That was good, at least on her side.

You started consoling him, rubbing his back in circles as he drunkenly wept on the polished wood after downing one too many tequila shots. The speed in which he drank each one was shocking to say the least, you don't think his glass touched the table since he picked it up.

"We've known each 'ther shince we were kitss." He hiccupped, head resting in-between his arms as he tearfully stared in the distance and dangled the shot cup in his fingers.

"If I shaid sumnthin 'ears ago, would she hab 'ccepted me — or or or — shill reject me because of awer shub-genda?" You pitifully stared at his crumpled form, not knowing what to really say to make him feel better about the situation. The bartender then took his glass from Bertolt and told you to take the poor guy home, shaking his head slowly as he quietly whined about getting cut off.

"C'mon big guy, let's get you back."

The walk was quiet besides the occasional sniffle and you could tell he was trying not to fall on top of you, his feet slowly dragging on the concrete. As the designated sober friend, you were carefully observing him, a hand firmly holding the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He stopped suddenly, the sounds of his sneakers squeaking.

"Y/N."

"Hm?"

You turned your attention towards him, tilting your head to the side.

"If I wazzn'tin love wif Annie, I'd be sooooo in love 'ith—"

Bertolt then jolted to the side of an alleyway before he could finish what he was saying and started throwing up. It prompted you to quickly go by his side and hold him up, patting hard on his back to get it all out. You knew what he was going to say and you hated it. He's drunk and sad, nothing that came out of him was going to be honest.

"Don't say that Bertolt." You mumbled, lifting him back up once he finished and slinging his arm over your shoulders.

"I'm not going to be a replacement for you."

He reached over with his other hand, skin cold around the nape of your neck as he pulled your face towards his. You could smell the alcohol lingering in his breath, face cringing when you saw a bit of spittle still hanging off of his lips. He started saying something even more incoherent, his eyes beginning to close in hints of slumber.

"No, no, no. I... I swer'lve ewtoo."

You laughed softly as you shook your head in amusement, pulling him forwards. He really won't remember this at all. Bertolt finally fell silent, the occasional drunken groans slipping through if you tugged him too roughly.

Maybe in another world, if you had met Bertolt before Reiner...

You made the decision to take him to your dorm. The dormitory building was way closer than the frat house he lived in, and you'd rather not lug around his heavy body another ten blocks to get there. Never in your life you had thought you'd be sneaking in a giant of an alpha into the shared beta-omega dorms, but you wouldn't be the first to do so. It's a good thing his scent was currently dulled with alcohol or you'd be in more trouble trying to hide him. Quickly unlocking your door and taking him over to your loveseat, you watched as his body slowly relaxed into the cushions.

He was simply way too tall for the seating, his legs dangled off of the side of the couch as you adjusted him to a positioning that would prevent any risk of asphyxiation if he started throwing up again. You highly doubted that he had anything left in him, but it was good to be on the safe side. You lightly pinched his cheek, getting a change of clothes and headed towards the bathroom.

You checked on him once more before going to bed, a light snore coming out of him. Seems like he's all tuckered out and okay for now, the hangover is definitely not going to be pretty in the morning. You settled yourself into your sheets and turned the lights off, soon falling asleep.

The sound of your alarm on your phone blared in your ears, arms trying to pull out from underneath the blanket to turn it off but you didn't move an inch. Groggily opening your eyes, you saw an arm wrapped around your body, your mind not registering what was going on until you heard the soft sounds of breathing on top of your head. You turned your head slowly to the couch, the connection finally being put together when you saw his body wasn't lying there.

He started to rouse from his sleep when the alarm kept sounding off, an annoyed hiss slipping through his lip as his head lifted up from yours, reaching over himself to shut it off.

"Good morning big guy." You whispered as he settled back next to you, lightly squeezing you closer to him as if you were his pillow.

Bertolt grumbled quietly. "What time is it?"

"According to my alarm, maybe 8:05 in the morning." You tried to get up to get him water and something for his headache, but he didn't budge an inch. The two of you laid with each other, basking in the morning warmth quietly.

"Sorry for getting in bed with you, I tried finding a blanket but didn't want to wake you up."

"It's fine," You hummed quietly, turning your body towards him. "You okay though?"

He opened his mouth but closed it, falling silent as he slowly began to think. He turned on his back, staring at the white ceiling.

"Not really. Everything still hurts and I'm tempted to cry even more but... I don't know. Some part of me feels... relieved? If I never told her, I'd still be stuck in a loop worrying whether I'd ruin something between us and keep having this twist in my stomach whenever I see her with someone else. I'm glad that she found someone that she's happy with but..."

Bertolt put his forearm over his eyes, letting out a soft laugh.

"But why do I still want her?" His voice cracked, a tremble following the end of his words and once more, you wrapped your arms around his torso. You could smell his sadness, a heavy and misty petrichor filling the room in waves.

"Sometimes there's things that we desperately want to have but can't have. Irrational as it is, it's in our nature." You mumbled, your hands balling up in his sweatshirt.

"Like you with Reiner?" Your blood ran cold as he said that but you merely pushed your face into his body.

"I don't know."

In the end, Reiner managed to find you and ask you to his game. You texted Bertolt, asking how was he able to get your location after being almost MIA for months. Apparently when you and him finally snuck him out of the dormitory, it completely slipped his mind that he had to wash off like usual. When he entered the frat house, Reiner greeted him but stopped midway, quickly approaching him and grabbing his shirt collar roughly.

He demanded me to tell him where you were. I'm so sorry Y/N, I couldn't stop him and our team needs the both of us playing.

You stared at the text, almost throwing your phone in frustration. You should've said no, had firmly stood behind your decision. Yet, the second his pheromones reached your nostrils, you couldn't stop yourself from agreeing, even if you were trying to look angry at him. You've noticed it had gotten stronger than before, was it because you haven't seen him in a while? You couldn't even be mad at Bertolt, you'd be terrified out of your mind too if an alpha was demanding an answer from you like that.

It's only for a few hours, you thought as you took in a slow breath. After that, he'll finally leave you alone.

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

Reiner picked you up earlier than usual. It was about 5:10 when you heard a knock at your door, causing you put down the lip gloss before you even could apply it. Shuffling over and peeking through the peephole, you saw him standing there in a suit and tie. He cleaned himself up, the stubble he once had when he found you was completely shaven away and his blond hair was slight slicked back with gel.

"You're early." You muttered as you opened the door, keeping it barely ajar. He's not even supposed to step foot in the dorm, nervousness crawling up your spine. His pheromones hit you like a train, practically everyone that was walking down the dorm hallway could smell him, heads turning in your room's direction.

"I wanted to see you." He grinned, pushing the door open even more — nearly knocking you over — and handing you a bouquet of morning glories, camellias, and forget-me-nots. As you were staring at the mostly red flowers, almost a complete eyesore with the addition of the light blue petals that peered out from within, he waltzed in your safe haven without your permission.

"Hey! Reiner, you can't just—!"

You groaned as you exasperatedly followed after him, placing the bouquet down on your desk. His form was absolutely massive compared to the entire room, his head constantly turning towards the different decor that you hung up on the walls.

"I've never seen your dorm on the inside before, it's cute. It's... you." He softly mumbled, your face turning warm. You grabbed his sleeve, trying to tug him out of your space so you can get ready, but he stopped in the middle of the room, his attention honed in towards the messed sheets of your bed.

"Reiner," You started, your eyes following to where he was looking at. Your heart nearly stopped in your chest when you smelled a burning anger occupy the space — a smoldering, cindering scent — nearly making you cover your nose from how horrible it was. You gulped, hand slipping out and down to your side in a fist. "Reiner, w-we... we didn't do anything."

He just stood there silently, still focused on your bed. He has every right to be angry, you were literally snuggling with his best friend this morning, but you didn't belong to him. Scummy as it was, you made your bed and laid on it, there was nothing he could change about it.

"I-I'm just going to get ready." You whispered, turning around to go back into the bathroom. Big mistake.

Large hands grabbed your wrist, dragging you around in a speed that you couldn't comprehend. You almost screamed as he threw you on the bed, Reiner following after you and trapping you beneath him, his leg in-between yours. Fear was pouring out of you in waves but he couldn't smell it, no one could.

It took him little time and effort for him to press his lips against yours, your eyes wide as you soon realized what he was doing. You tried moving your mouth away, a scared and little no slipping out but he caught you again, his hand gripping your chin and forcing your head to stay in place. You tried pulling at his suit, squirming and kicking your legs, anything to get this monster off of you, but he didn't budge, seemingly finding enjoyment in your weak attempts as he pressed himself deeper against your lips.

His knee nudged at your cunt, a muffled, surprised gasp coming out of you, letting him enter your mouth even more. A shiver ran up your spine as you felt his tongue run against yours, the wet muscle violating wherever he went in a meticulous fashion. You could barely breathe, the smell of him and the aftershave he had on was so intense that you could feel the tug of your omega side slipping through the cracks of your mind; not even your medication was able to stop you from feeling this way.

Reiner finally pulled away, a mix of each other's saliva connecting the two of you. Strands of his gelled back hair fell over his forehead, your once-brushed out hair tousled into a mess. Both of your breaths were uneven and heavy, his eyes low and dazed as he stared down at you. Tears were running down your face, ruining what you've already put on, your eyebrows scrunched together in absolute horror as you shared the same stare with him. He sniffed the air once, again and again as he neared your neck.

"Stop, stop, stop." You cried out as you pushed against his stubborn head, fearing that he would bite down on your scent gland.

He didn't make any move, only sniffing at you like a curious dog. He then pressed his lips against it, causing you to abruptly stiffen in horrid expectation.

There was no pain as he pulled away from you, your hand immediately shooting to your neck to feel for any welts or marks. Nothing. A simple kiss was all he did on it, and you couldn't help but feel appreciative that he didn't mark you.

"Don't you dare see Bertolt ever again, you understand?" He hissed into your ear, the threat echoing hollowly in your head. No way in hell were you going to listen to him, but the omega in you nodded slowly, his heavy body finally lifting off of you. You tried to ignore the imprint straining against his lower half, your eyes staring up at him in complete shock.

"Go get yourself ready."

Shakily getting up on your feet, you beelined towards the bathroom without a single word, nearly collapsing on the floor once you turned the lock. As you looked at your face in the mirror, dripping dark drops of mascara and eyeliner stained the apples of your cheeks. The lipstick that was once there, was now rubbed away, leaving nothing but your bare lips. Your hand trembled as you reached over for a makeup wipe, a quiver of a sigh coming out of you.

You wanted to throw up, get every bit of spit and slobber of his out of your system, but you couldn’t. He’d hear you.

Reiner brought one of his jersey's for you to wear once you came out of the bathroom with fresh casual makeup back on, and you could tell that the article was completely drenched in his scent. You sniffed at it gingerly as you held it in your hands, cringing away from the sweet vanilla smell.

"What? It's clean, I promise."

"Liar." You mumbled under your breath but pulled it over the shirt you wore, the fabric loose against your body. He took a quick minute to admire you in his clothing, placing his hand on your cheek and stroking the skin with his thumb. You could still see the red stain of your lipstick smeared on his lips, trying to fight back tears and a sneer.

"You look so fuckable right now," You bit the inside of your cheek as you watched the tip of his tongue licked across his bottom lip, the darks of his pupils reflecting an unhinged licentiousness that horrified you within every atom in your body. "Maybe tonight, when I win, I'll be getting another trophy."

"Don't forget our deal asshole," You finally spat out, ripping his hand off of your face in disgust. "I'm only going to your stupid game because of the promise you made this morning."

Reiner simply stared down at you, your nerves scrambling even worse than before. He finally scoffed, crossing his arms. "Right. Our deal."

You hated the fact that he basically was acting like he didn't just forcefully kiss you, your nails digging into the palm of your hand. "Can we go now?"

He checked his phone, huffing slightly. "Yeah. Don't worry, we're not that far to the stadium. Just a few traffic lights and we'll be there."

You felt all the color drain from your face. You thought it was close by in walking terms but now you had to be in a small space where it now completely smells like him? Might as well hold your breath the entire ride.

The short drive was quiet, some random old rock station was lowly playing on the radio, but the two of you didn't speak to each other. What would even be exchanged anymore? You didn't want to be associated with him so long as you walked on this planet. Reiner's fingers thrummed on the wheel, red spilling into the car and staining every surface within. He turned towards you as if he wanted to say something and you stared back, a chill running down your spine. No words were said, but you felt every little thing from his smell.

Ravenous, a voracious appetite for the predator in disguise. Right in front of him, a five-course meal just ripe for the picking. All he's doing now was waiting for you to back into an inescapable cliff, the perfect moment to finally strike.

"...You have to go." You whispered and he finally broke eye contact, staring at the traffic light above and accelerating.

"Yeah, right."

The silence once presumed until the two of you approached the stadium, him mentioning that he got you a seat near the rink so you could see the action up close. To be honest, you could care less about the game and who would win overall. Reiner handed you the ticket between his index and middle finger, but when you reached over to grab it, he took it back.

"Need a good luck kiss from you first. If this is the last time I'll get to see you, I want to make it last."

You didn't want to rile him up before he played or make him force his hand upon you in the car, so you planted a quick kiss on his cheek before grabbing the ticket from his hand simultaneously. "Okay. Done. Good luck or whatever."

You scrambled out of his car, making your way to the inside as soon as possible. The arena was louder than you thought once you stepped foot, the joyous chatter and screams echoing throughout the hallways. LED screens hanging from the ceiling flashed the words Marley Warriors vs Paradis Titans, showing the line-ups of each team member.

Reiner came first in the centers, his pose prideful and boasting with stats to match. The other three names that you noticed were Porco Galliard, Colt Grice, and Eren Kruger. You eventually saw Bertolt come up as one of the right wingers but no sign of his usual reserved side showed in his photo, he looked focused and tough more than anything else. One of the goalies was an older looking individual by the name of Zeke Jaeger, confident but not too boasting. Clips of their past games showed afterwards, showing their amazing teamwork and impressive previous goals, then moving on to the other team.

The main centers for the Paradis Titans were composed of four men; Eren Jaeger, Jean Kirschtein, Levi Ackerman, and Miche Zacharius. Was the Eren guy related to the other Jaeger on your university's team? They definitely didn't look alike in your opinion but it could simply be because of a crazy Punnett square. Some wingers and defensemen that you sorta paid attention to were Armin Arlelt, Hange Zoë, Floch Forster, and Connie Springer. The goalie on their team was a massive blond man named Erwin Smith, his photo exuding a powerful stance, maybe even more than your uni's goalie. You felt like Reiner's team might have some trouble facing them, their defense and attack seems pretty threatening.

You finally took a glance at your ticket, walking around trying to find the stairway for your seating. The smells of popcorn, melted cheese, and hotdogs filled your nose, but you didn't feel hungry at all, still sick to your stomach from what had happened earlier. Eventually you finally found where you were supposed to go, and if you thought it was loud in the other shell of the arena, finally stepping in the seating area and the rink was absolutely ear-breaking.

Sirens, music, screaming, loud announcers. Almost every unbearable sound was contained in the structure, you should've bought earplugs prior to this. Not to mention, every scent of maybe hundred alphas and omegas intertwined made you feel even more overwhelmed, a headache beginning to form.

It's only for a few hours, a few hours and you'll never see this place or him ever again.

Your seat was nearby Reiner's team, nearly in-between the other team as well, the other teammates chattering with each other. You've sorta recognized them, occasionally seen around campus and such. Heads and eyes of strangers from school nearby were somewhat turning towards you, even the team started to notice you walking up behind them. Your face burned up at the realization once you sat down. Shit. You had completely forgotten that you were wearing Reiner's heavily scented jersey, you might as well be showing off the mating mark that he could've made a few hours ago.

"Yo Braun's omega is here!" One of the team members called out and you almost hid your head in your hands in embarrassment. Oh God, don't say that.

"Y/N, you made it?" The most recognizable voice cleared your thoughts immediately, head perking back up with a wide smile.

"Bertolt!" You wanted to hug him but he recoiled back as if you were a stranger, his nose scrunching. Your face fell immediately, his gaze sinking down in shame when he noticed your crestfallen expression.

"Sorry, it's not you. It's... y'know. That." He nudged the bottom of the jersey with the end of his stick, a frown forming on your face.

"I know. He made me wear it." You frustratingly tugged at the fabric with one hand and he chuckled, ruffling the top of your head. You'd burn it on the spot if you could.

"I didn't make you wear anything babe, you've always liked wearing my clothes." The sound of his voice made you freeze in place, eyes wide as your head turned in the direction of where he was walking in. Bertolt followed suit, his hand retracting away from you as if you were suddenly a hot stove.

"I don't think I could follow up your end of our deal if you're not respecting my demands, omega." No. That was never part of the agreement. You just gave the okay so he'd get off your back about it. He genuinely couldn't be serious about not seeing Bertolt anymore, right?

"Don't be an asshole Reiner. She's not just an omega."

The blond scowled at his friend, shoving his helmet roughly against his chest. He pushed it off of him, staring the other down in a sneer. You've never seen Bertolt like this before, the usual rain smell he had was turning stormy and bitterly furious.

"Oh, I'm the asshole? I wasn't the one hiding my fucking mate from me for months and sleeping in her bed. Not to mention, what happened to Annie or did you get tired of another alpha that's better than you?" You internally winced for him, that was such a low blow. Bertolt looked stunned for a second, glancing over at you for a quick second, but he pushed his shoulder back roughly in return.

"Don't bring Annie into this Reiner, this is about my friend. Did you really think she'd let you — of all people in this school — mark her when you act like a conceited asshole? She's not your fated mate. You've proven that over and over again that she's going to be like the rest, you knotheaded fuck."

You gasped at the sudden insult, a vein nearly popping out of Reiner's forehead but he didn't say anything more, pushing past Bertolt and shouldering him roughly with a scowl. You didn't mean for them to start an argument with one another, the game hadn't even started and tensions were already high. The Paradis Titans team weren't hiding their amused stares, the Eren Jaeger guy whispering to the short haired, bowl-cut blond next to him; Armin, you think. The murmurs of strangers behind you made you feel sick, hearing the word knottease being tossed around, the horrid word directed towards you.

You started to apologize profusely once Bertolt turned towards you, but he simply held out a hand, patting your shoulder as you stopped.

"Don't be. Someone needed to say it to him, maybe this fight would finally clear his head."

"But the game Bertolt, I—" You started but he interrupted you once more.

"I don't give a shit about the game if you're the one being hurt. You matter more than hitting a puck around, okay?" If you weren't wearing Reiner's jersey, you'd hug him right now. He smiled and put his helmet on, leaning close to you to whisper something in your ear.

"By the way, don't listen to the jerks behind you. You're nothing like that, you're going to be something great." He backed away once the horn started, walking over to the entrance to the ice rink to join his team. Good luck, you wanted to say because if anything, he'll need it when he gets into the arena with a monster in tow.

‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’

If you thought Reiner was bad in practice, his violent playstyle was nothing compared to when he's in an actual game. How on Earth this sport was approved to play for anyone, you had no idea. All you could hear was men yelling at each other and slamming each other to snatch the slippery little puck, fans behind you hollering just as loudly.

Both Reiner and Bertolt had seemed to forgive each other on the court, winning being the only thing on their minds. Just like in practice, they didn't have to say anything to get the point across, making passes and attempted shots whenever they had the slightest of openings. The two Galliards seemed to be more communicative with one another, defending the goalie whenever they could with short barks of commands. They were good but Eren Jaeger seemed to be the rookie ace of the Titans, managing to push through and score in the most impossible scenarios.

You could tell he was aggravating them, putting them in a corner while constantly taunting them with a one-liner or a smug smile as he scored. An angry alpha was something not to mess with and putting a whole group of them against other alphas who were mocking them for their failures? It's obviously an immediate recipe for disaster.

Intermission came around, the score against the Warriors by two. As the teams were talking to one another to plan out their next attack, you watched the Zambonis slowly smooth out the ice again. You paid no attention to them and their chatter, you wouldn't have made sense of it anyways.

"Hey," You looked around for the source of the voice and finally down, seeing bright turquoise-blue and a mess of brown hair standing below you. He smelled sharply fresh, like the first bite to a mint leaf and drinking cold water afterwards. It wasn't necessarily bad like most in the arena, just made your nose crinkle a little from the suddenness of it. "Eren Jaeger."

"Oh- um... Y/N. Aren't you supposed to be talking to your team?"

He waved his hand dismissively towards your statement, crossing his arms with a smile. "Nah, there's nothing else that's new with the planning. You, however, are the talk of the arena."

Your cheeks flushed warm, the temptation of burying yourself alive later on growing more and more, but you grimaced instead. "So what? You wanted to see if I'm what they say I am?"

Eren shook his head, taking a few steps closer towards you. "I'm not talking about the knottease comments, I'm talking about the Reiner Braun's mate comments. Is it true?"

"No! Of course not!" You exclaimed in shock, but the subtle-not-so-subtle glance downwards towards your attire seemed to make him doubt you otherwise. You tried defending yourself about it without revealing much about the twisted relationship you actually have with Reiner.

"This is just because he thinks he's claimed me and we've made a deal. I have no other choice."

"Is it now? Well then," He pointed towards himself with a thumb, his grin growing even wider. "When I win, wanna go on a date with me after this?"

How many alphas were gunning for you right now?! You knew that you took your suppressants today after Bertolt left your dorm so how come this was happening to you? The absolute balls on this man, especially since he was thinking that his team had already won. You wearily shook your head, you've had your fill of pestering alphas for the rest of your schooling life.

He looked dejected for a second but perked up immediately, the buzzer of the timer echoing throughout the arena. You thought that was that and began to turn your attention towards your college's team, but then he called out a 'head's up', tossing something in your direction. You caught it in surprise, looking in the palm of your hands and finding a keyhole shaped earring.

"Keep it! For the next time we meet!" Eren waved you goodbye and jogged over to his side of the team, high-fiving and chattering with his friends before putting a helmet on. You let a small smile slip out, he may be a little cute but there was definitely no way you were ever going to see him ever again. You safely tucked it into your pocket, finally looking towards the Warriors.

He was watching you. Of course. There was a livid look in his eyes, his brows scrunched even more in irascibility and his teeth were bared, perhaps even grinding together in this current moment. You paled at the thought of them sinking into your neck like some kind of rabid animal. Reiner was barely human anymore, you realize. Any loving gaze that he had before for you was nothing more but a dangerous hunger.

All you could hope was for the Warriors to win so he would be in a decent mood to finalize the goodbyes, and you'd pray for the Titans for the brutality that they're about to endure because of his horrid attachment to you.

The players slid into the ice once more, the deafening cheers of everyone growing louder and louder as the second half of the game was beginning to start. The referee smoothly made his way between the two masses of men, Reiner staring down coldly into the clear mask of Eren. Like a coin flip, the puck was thrown highly into the midst of them, their eyes following it as it made its way down to the icy ground.

Click.

In a snap of a finger, the sound of sticks bashed together once the puck bounced off of the surface. Like a choreographed dance, the rivals whirled with one another, swinging and twisting their bodies around in order to get ahold of the very thing that might as well be the trophy itself. The intensity of the game was now at an all time high that even you started to pay more attention to it, the hairs on your arms raising in anticipation.

The puck swung back and forth like a pinball, but the Warriors managing to catch up to a tie. It was starting to become a standstill again however, taunting chants coming out from the people in the stands, jeering at the anyone that opposed their team. Players were being switched out on both teams during timeouts but few remained on the ice, a tense aura between the three.

Reiner, Bertolt, Eren.

Bertolt took a few glances at his friend, tapping the end of his stick with his and seemingly started to exchange words with him from what you could see. Who knows what it was about; the game, the enemy team, you. He only lifted his fist up, letting the other return it in a similar gesture and that seemed to calm the black-haired male's nerves.

Reiner's eyes were lasered in on Eren for the most part, gripping the handle of his stick tightly and swiping it around on the ice as if he was practicing a shot. He was truly unrecognizable, a shell of the man that once followed you around like the world's most clingiest puppy dog. You knew he wanted to show-off, his pride was at risk to a girl that he believed he owned for months. Disgusting and typical.

Eren seemed the most lax out of all of them, leaning against the plastic border as fans behind him fawned over him. He seemed not to care about Reiner's burning glares at him, waving across the rink to seemingly you. He seemed nice, but it was obvious that he had more intentions than just wanting to befriend you.

The whistle sounded and the game began once more, the men skating themselves back to the middle. You checked how much time was left on the clock, ten minutes. Ten more excruciating minutes and you were going to be finally free.

" 'Round it now!" You could hear Reiner call out to Grice as he suddenly slammed his complete weight into enemy Jaeger, their eyes meeting as the others chased after the puck. They went after it as well once he recovered from the blow, but it looked like they started talking and you managed to spot a furious glint glazing over his hazel eyes.

He suddenly threw his stick out onto the rink, ripping off his gloves and grabbing Jaeger's shirt by the collar in frightening speed. Reiner was undeniably experienced with his punches, uppercutting him from below the mask. It toppled off of his head, falling to the ground with a crack, and Eren was stunned for a second, just for a single second. He was unable to completely process what had happened before the bigger male tackled him to the cold ground, the deafening sounds of heavy bodies slamming into the ice made the arena stand still.

The referee was too afraid to intervene but blew the whistle immediately, and hundreds of people watched the Reiner Braun brutally dig his knuckles into his face. Fresh crimson spilt down on the ice in splatters and you were forced to witness him weakly trying to stop him, protecting his face as much as possible to no avail. Bertolt immediately tried pulling him off of him, shouting at him that he needed to stop but it was like he was in a trance, almost attacking him in the process.

He finally was pulled off of Eren by the goalie of Warriors — furiously throwing his own punch into his face — and the poor boy having to be quickly removed from the rink on a stretcher. Reiner was pinned to the ground by multiple individuals and given a tranquilizer, his body soon relaxing and slumping over. They put him on a stretcher as well, his hands and legs bounded together and his mouth wrapped with a cloth rag. He was still slightly conscious, his calm and woozy stare meeting your horrified one.

The game had to continue without them but you had already left, not knowing the result. You felt too nauseous from smelling the sheer fear and panic that was coming of Eren, pungent and potent as it filled the air. But Reiner's...

All you could smell was that sickening warmth, a burning sensation in your nares. The same scent from your dorm but that's not at all what made you leave immediately. The sick fuck was happy he was beating into the defenseless guy, exhilarated that his blood was running down his skin and staining the floor, joyful. The nose doesn't lie and you wonder if everyone else caught it too.

Bertolt texted you when he visited Reiner in the hospital, but you didn't respond, busy trying to scrub the remnants of him out of your dorm while tears ran down your cheeks.

He did it for you.

[narwhalandchill]

also finished the 4.7 AQ and like . well firstly rip to all the sinner theories where it was like could it be nibelung or someone else and all like that was a bit tragic but thats the nature of theories i suppose. i do think it makes sense that the bigger players arent just all going to be figures we Already know of but yea.

overall i think it was like. quite good but also kinda suffers from the way these quests just Have to be an annual thing especially with how short it was? i saw a comment being like this feels like it shouldve been the epilogue to caribert and i kinda agree . also as much as it is appreciated that we Do get some direct answers to big lore questions in the quest was kind of a exposition dump in that sense . fade to black w the abyss sib and dain duel was certainly a Choice 💀

caribert truly is a sweetheart man i didnt expect him to pop up but i feel so bad for him now. except for the loomzoning atossa thing i get that he had no choice on the matter but that was rough for ur girl 😭😭

iiiiiii dunno how to feel about the whole we forget all about the reunion anyway when traveler Remembering as a descender has been established as such a core thing like it kinda feels like a copout im ngl . guess we are just now . aware of information as players that the traveler is not privy to . considering im already more than a little wary towards the general concept of like. memory erasure slash irminsul stuff when it comes to genshins writing im definitely feeling conflicted w this . also applies to the loom of fate editing reality thing . like okay on some level yes it is cool to include such prevalent elements of like. uncertainty and unreliable narration but in worst case those concepts are also v easy for a careless writing team to just. run off w and end up w a convoluted mess so i rly rly hope that wont end up the case

anyway. so the sinners are the big deal this time around i suppose and like. not that i wasnt necessarily expecting surtalogi to indeed be khaenriahn but the confirmation is certainly here now. no particular feelings on this from me im afraid bc like. Highly unpopular lore thing from me but both khaenriah n hexenzirkel (the latter more so than former) are kinda these. big lore topics and entities that i logically Do know and acknowledge as the massive deals they are to the story. but they just arent sth i have so far gotten that invested in altho khaenriah i have somewhat warmed up to . hexenzirkel still feels too much like an unnecessary presence to me lmao i might be missing out on stuff but if the abyss order arguably has a lack of story presence issue then the witches have it like 5 times worse 💀 But point being surtalogi being part of this whole crew of transcendent beings from khaenriah that became sinners is like . okay then isiskskskdk its not that big a deal for me

i think the most meaningful implications from that (in terms of My personal lore fixations at least *cough*) just have to do w like . sth id already been thinking about even before we got the confirmation of the visionary as the sinner that clothar found (which was a big theory anyway that i did personally find very compelling and well its canon now). and that is just the way that like . when skirk compared surtalogi as one in pursuit of "perfection" and brought up the visionary and rhinedottir as two ppl akin to him. that and the narzissenkreuz note about primordial human essentially being the synonym for descenders . & how rhines magnum opus was the primordial human PROJECT aka in light of this note. Very likely to be an attempt at Creating a descender . and how the sinners and abyss orders loom of fate is obviously just another pathway into accessing some sorta will or way to rival the world and defy the heavenly principles . became this thing where i was like 90% convinced and now 100% convinced that if the "perfection" both gold and the visionary pursue is indeed a descenders will in one form or another . then surtalogis aims Must involve the same fucking thing

which naturally gets us back to the insane ajax theory territory bc . if what connects those 3 (and post 4.7 more like. All the transcendent sinners from khaenriah) is getting to that world rivaling will. Then it sure fucking makes Everything surtalogi is doing and planning w both the narwhal and ajax Very Interesting . like it sure is curious that These would be the things surtalogi is occupying himself with if its indeed a descender he seeks . so like . Yeah we dont need to get into 3rd descender stuff but one thing i sure do think is becoming less and less like crackpot speculation and more and more and explicitly foreshadowed future direction for childes arc is that. one way or another. he is going to be involved with the subject of becoming a descender . bc like. if gold tried creating one w alchemy. and if the visionary is Literally creating a loom of fate to serve as the machine capable of weaving a worlds worth of leylines and destiny aka just a descender equivalent machine . then it sure wouldnt make sense for surtalogi to be putting all this heavy effort and resources (as skirk commented on) towards acquiring and possibly subduing an interstellar voyager like the narwhal and getting his student to look for and train the weird kid with a possibly innate connection w it. Without that serving a role in His brand of descender equivalency that hes seeking as a sinner. So yeah childe long term relevance stocks are definitely up w this one guys Trust

but yea thats on surtalogi for me . Point being its not rly a New suspicion for me (like ever since primordial human project started sounding like DIY descender lab project i was thinking this) but i think its been absolutely further affirmed by directly linking surtalogi to the sinners of khaenriah that more likely than not seem like theyre All going to be ppl who used the abyss to seek the power of a descender in a variety of ways???? so thats very neat . wonder who the other 2 will turn out to be then .

another thing to do w the sinners is also like. the way that if we do count dainsleif among them just as one that Didnt jusr abandon the ppl during the cataclysm . there is obviously that doomed number of Six there . so like pygmy theories have been going wild already in the few days it took me to catch up w the AQ but im just kinda . i Still think pale princess is most likely to be about an irminsuled event and be about sth far further back into the timeline than khaenriah and the cataclysm . theres things like rhe night mother specifically talking abt Thousands of years passing before the new hero (= 4th descender aka us most likely) appears to challenge her and also just the general way i still think pale princess aligns too much w the story of the seelie ancestor and her lover Not to be a story about that time period . so as much as the 5+1 sinners of khaenriah being the pygmies is like. Yes the numbers would finally add up clearly with no mental backflips needed unlike w the archons . but like all things considered im still a bit unconvinced. we shall see . that book is a menace anyway so its always gonna be a hot topic lmao like what is Up with it 💀

[miintsprigz]

Ohio RTC live-blogging

I watched the Saturday stream, and I documented my thoughts because hyperfixation goes brrrr

HEADS UP

there was a lot of ableism in the chat (I do discuss what it entails below so you’ve been warned) so I was distracted at the end of the stream

-Karnak’s frantic tone during the accident + freeze frame moment, very cool

-them holding up the prizes

-Constance’s mumbled “sorry”

-post-possession Noel and Mischa stuff is so good (the o.e face and shoulder shake)

-I don’t like Ricky’s disability being stolen again, but I do like the fact that they’re happy that he’s happy, seems to be “bro”ing it up with Mischa a bit, I do love that

-JANE! (OVERANALYZES LIKE CRAZY) The way she tips her head a lot like it doesn’t fit her body comfortably. She sounds so timid…awww, honey…she moves a bit like her body is off-balance from the new head, I love the details

-I see evidence of platonic (at least) spacedolls already. Ricky waved at Jane!!!

-BREASTMILK CHEESE SANDWICH EATING BLEGH

-even in the “ocean’s life” segment Jane’s movements are just a BIT off. I think it’s cool when the Jane is taller in the cast, makes me think of a Barbie/pos

Poor gal seems real uncomfy in those lenses tho, can’t blame her

-all of the cast looks like they’re having the time of their life

-Mischa’s mannerisms are already cracking me up

-I am appreciating Noel very much in this production tbh, very sharp-tongued and excellent emoting in the face

-Jane’s delivery of That One Line (I hear it gives you an—)

-despite the small theatre and tech limits because of that, they really do well getting the point across with the props

-gosh props to Noel that change takes too long even in the main show, but he works it

-RICKY’S LIL SHIMMY IN THE BEGINNING OF NOEL’S LAMENT AND HE SEEMS TO ACTUALLY BE PLAYING ACCORDION!!!

-CAN ALL MISCHAS EVERYWHERE STOP BEING SO PRETTY, RESPECTFULLY!!

-THAT NOIR FILM IN THE BACK, I LOVE!

-ngl I’m in love with this Ricky

-these dances are so fun!

-not a ton of Nischa in here with the end of the lament but—

-Constance’s “w h y” after the F word joke

-B O N S O I R

-them adding improv in ESGAL is a bit silly, but oh, RuPaul ref. That blindsided me lol

-RICKY AND JANE ARE GROOVING TO MISCHA’S INTRO TOGETHER AWWWW THEYRE HAVING SO MUCH FUN!!!

-they seem to be sort of un-possessed in TSIA, and Mischa seems a bit more friendly in this production so I think that fits decently

-RICKY HAS A LOW RANGE HEYYYY (Debby Ryans)

-I love how they try to make it like he can’t remember his rap—or can he actually not remember? Either way they played it off like it was on purpose and I appreciate that

-interesting how Jane’s a stand-in for Talia, cuz she could be anyone, she’s a blank body sorta

-I love the dances so so much, how they seem to be fencing Mischa in, and HE SINGS SO WELL, they did their best with the projector and got it across

-The way he just SITS DOWN AWWWW HON HE LOOKS SO SAD

-NOEL AND MISCHA HUG? NOEL AND MISCHA HUG!!!! AWWWWW IM CRYIN they seem so genuine about that whole part! person I’ve tagged said they noticed Mischa is audibly crying for quite a bit, poor dear

-again, Mischa encourages Ricky, I appreciate this! They see the Ricky and Mischa friendship supremacy!!!

-Mischa and Jane acting like generally strange parents and tHE FAKE ACTION SCENES which I genuinely think should have been in the original

-the implication that zolar daydreams came from food poisoning, this poor lad, I know it’s not exclusive to this version but dang

-this Ricky is just very captivating, I think this is a part that takes a lot of…uhhh, chutzpah, to play

-(sees Jane being a very passionate kitty) … (adds to spacedolls evidence folder)

-hehe I love that Mischa is Count Dogula

-also that black hole sound frequency reference made me so happy (“68 octaves below the middle C”)

-this Mischa has ADHD imo and I live for it

-AW JANE HAS SUCH A TINY MEMORY BOX. …big enough for a head. Cruel.

-they really worked with what they had for the background on Jane’s song. The way she blends into the scenery fits. That’s what she’s been doing this whole show. Also her trying so hard to grab her memory box and it’s always out of reach ;A;

-HER VOICE IS EXCELLENT this is impressing me in a bigger way than I thought it would

-the shadows moving!!! the way she can kind of recall knowing them, but not enough to know their faces or names

-the circling with the lights does make me think she’s falling, and the fact that she’s holding an umbrella…and sounds like she’s crying at the end…she’s so alone dude, I care her

-that last note was like a final scream

-Noel and Jane interaction!!! something I never see!!! I love it!

-Ricky is so gentle with Jane ;-;

-THEYRE HAVING FUN!!! SO CUTE!!!

-(chat is ableist about someone either ticcing, stimming, or having a meltdown in the audience and distracts me)

-Sugarcloud was excellent sorry I was too busy being full of rage

-Piano go breaking noises

-“you will soar to great heights” o u c h

-THE GROUP HUG AND THE BACKWARDS ROLLERCOASTER SOUNDS

-AW CONSTANCE AND OCEAN AND RICKY AND NOEL SPINNING EACH OTHER

-MISCHA AND NOEL DANCING!

-THEYRE SO HAPPY

-ACAPELLA DREAM OF LIFE WITH GROUP HUG HITS REALLY DIFFERENTLY

Do I have criticism? Uhhh well it wasn’t perfect but hey, from what I saw they didn’t have a ton to work with (nobody’s fault there) and they used their resources well.

I also constantly have to remind myself of the fact that this show has a cast of at most eight people acting, and it makes sense that it’s difficult to remember all of your lines, and the fact that everybody has a solo song!!!

I dream of some day playing an alto Jane, although I doubt it will ever happen, but I’m not sure I’m talented enough to do with this cast attempted

Also frick the people in chat who were being jerks about that audience member. git gud, Ricky would hate you you’re breaking the one rule

[chaoticparker]

Secrets

Peter parker x reader

Summary: May catches you and Peter sleeping together in bed and thinks the worst

Warnings: implications of sex, mentions of tiddies

w/c: 3.3k

masterlist

“Do you wanna come over after class today?” You slammed your locker door shut and saw Peter leaning against the locker next to you with a sappy smile. “I got that movie you wanted to watch.”

“Don’t you have patrol after school?” You started walking hand in hand down the hallway to your last class. 

“Nope.” He said happily, popping the p. “Mr. Stark is giving me the weekend off. Says I’ve been working myself to death.”

“Well that's true.” Peter furrowed his brows while looking back at you.  He opened his mouth to say something but you spoke before him. “Oh come on it’s true! You call me at midnight already tired and then show up the next day to class looking half dead.”

“I do not look half dead!” He defended. “Just a little tired.” 

“Well tonight you can go to sleep watching a movie, how's that?” You smiled, leaning a little closer to Peter to give him a peck on his lips. 

“Sounds nice.” Peter kissed your lips briefly again. “My place?”

You nodded your head and split up to go to your own classes. 

~~

“Cap made me run like 200 laps around the building!” Peter grumbled, twisting the key and swinging open the door to his and May's apartment. “Then he had me spar with him for like an hour last weekend! It’s like he doesn’t realize I have a life!”

“No wonder you were on Iron Man’s team.” You mumbled as you tossed your bag onto the floor and jumped onto the couch. Peter did the same and got on top of you, peppering kisses on your face. “Peter, stop your breath stinks!”

“Who’s breath stinks?” Peter jumped off from you and you quickly sat up on different ends on the couch as Aunt May entered the room. 

“Oh, Peter had uh coffee at school. A-and I was just telling him I could smell it from here.” You lied. Aunt May raised her eyebrow but didn't say anything, instead she sighed and reached for her work bag.

“Okay, well, I have a shift at the hospital and should be home late. I left some money for take out for dinner and Y/n,” She looked over to you with a happy smile on her face. “You’re more than welcome to stay the night here, just make sure you text your parents. And Peter can stay on the couch, right Peter?”

“Right, Aunt May.” Peter sheepishly said. He was still trying to calm down from Aunt May, almost catching you two. “Love you.”

“Love you too. And same for you Y/n.” May finished gathering all of her stuff and left the apartment. 

Peter and you let out a sigh of relief that you didn’t realize you were holding in. When you looked over to Peter -who was already looking at you- you both started laughing, happy you didn’t get caught. You scooted closer to him and ended up sitting on his lap. 

Peter had a deep blush printed all over his face as he wrapped his hand comfortably around your waist. He started leaning in to kiss you, but you held up your hand right in front of his lips to stop him.

“What?” He asked, a little annoyed that he couldn't get his kisses.

“I wasn’t lying when I said your breath stinks.” You teased. You kissed his cheek and got up from his lap, holding out a hand to help him up. “Come on, go get some mouthwash.”

He took your hand and you pulled him up. “Then can I kiss you?”

“We can make out for as long as you would like.” You smiled. That seemed to peak Peter's interest as he had a goofy smile on his face. You both headed for the bathroom. You waited outside of the bathroom, leaning onto the door frame.

“What do you think Aunt May would do if she found out we are dating?” Peter asked, taking a swig of the mouth wash.

You thought for a moment. You never really intended for May not to know, it just sorta happened that way. Kind of like how you and Peter got together. It just happened on a night like tonight, you were watching a movie and you both just looked at each other -ignoring the movie playing- and just kissed. 

That night it was already awkward enough with not only the kiss, but also right after trying to justify why you did it. Then Peter came clean right after you got back to watching the movie saying ‘I really like you’ and you saying the same. Talking about your emotions towards each other was difficult and just embarrassing. You can’t imagine doing it again.

Though, you wouldn’t change anything that night. 

“I don’t think she would let me stay over here as much.” You joked, not too sure what else to say.

Peter spat out his mouth wash and ran the faucet, forming a makeshift cup to bring water to his mouth. 

“I mean, she’s a cool aunt and an understanding person. I don’t think she would care. There was one night I was sleeping over and I got my period and she was really cool about it- gave me like twenty pads. And she helped me wash the shorts I was wearing.” You rambled. 

“First, never tell Aunt May you think she’s cool. It’ll go right to her head and I’ll never hear the end of it.” Peter commented. “And second, I think dating is different from having your period here.”

“I know that but she never complained once while I was panicking! I thought I ruined those shorts and was straight up about to cry-”

“Wait, was that the sleepover where you asked to borrow my shorts and I ended up giving you my boxers?” Peter asked, turning off the bathroom light and giving you a kiss on your lips.

“Yes, and don’t tell anyone about it! I don’t want Ned or Mj finding out.” You mumbled, grabbing his hand and walking to the kitchen. 

“You know that night was the first time I realized I liked seeing you in my clothes.” Peter hummed, bringing you a bowl of strawberries to eat. “Maybe you should do that again.”

You took a bite of a strawberry. “What? You want me to have my period and bleed through my pants again?” 

“What?!” Peter brought his hands up and shook his head. “No, no, no. I-I just met like I want to give you like my sweatshirt or something.”

You took another bite of a strawberry and reached for his hand. “But what one would I wear? Definitely not the one with the science pun on it.”

“I could give you my Spider-man one.” He smiled, taking a bite of one of the strawberries too.

“You bought your own merch?” You giggled. 

“Hey- Spider-man has to support local businesses!” Peter smiled. “Bought it while in the suit too so they could get more attention.”

“How sweet. But what about your midtown one?” You suggested. “You’ll know it's yours, but no one else would notice the difference; including May.”

“I’m not even too sure why we keep May in the dark.” Peter sighed. You rubbed your thumb over his hand, trying to sooth him.

“What if we tell her when she gets back? I think we could craft a pretty good way to tell her.” You thought. “It would take pressure off you, and you really don’t need any more stress.”

You took your hand away from Peter’s and wrapped your arm around his neck, your hand combing his hair. Peter hummed, but then suddenly stopped.

“Are you just saying I don’t need the stress because I look dead?” Peter wondered. “Or because you’re actually being a caring girlfriend for once?”

You smiled and leaned into Peter, your lips just grazing each other’s. “It’s because you look dead.”

Peter gasped but was silenced by your kiss. He dropped the strawberry that he was holding, and his hand found your waist again. He had hints of strawberry on his lips from the fruit, and he happily sighed into the kiss. Something about being with you made him feel amazing and like he didn’t have a care in the world. 

He made a mental note to thank Mr. Stark for the weekend. He hated admitting it but he desperately needed it. Peter’s life had rushed in places, having to deal with extreme consequences when he was only a kid, but here and now, he was simply a teenager, making out with his secret girlfriend that he loved very much.

And yes, when he woke up this morning he thought he looked dead.

You pulled away from Peter and lightly pulled his hair as you moved your hands away from him, getting another strawberry.

“But seriously, how do you want to tell Aunt May?” You asked, trying to get back on track after being distracted twice. 

Peter shrugged his shoulders. “Dunno. Is there something we can google- why are you turning around?”

You got up and stood with your back to Peter. “Did you get strawberry juice on my shirt? Feels damp.”

Peter bit his lip looking at the stain. “Maybe-”

“What!?” You turned back around and your jaw was tense. 

“In my defense you did just start kissing me! I don’t know what else…” You took your shirt off so you were only in your bra and headed your shirt to Peter. “Uh-”

“Don’t get too excited.” You snapped. “Figure out how to get the stain out, I’m gonna get one of your shirts.” You walked off to Peter’s room, mumbling how it was probably his plan to get you either shirtless, or wearing one of his shirts.

He jumped up and ran to the tap, running the stain under cold water. You came back out in one of Peter’s star wars shirts that made Peter blush redder than before. 

“Sorry it’s not the midtown one, but it's too hot for a sweatshirt.” You stood by Peter as he tried his best to scrub the stain out. 

“No, you look really pretty. And I’m sorry about the shirt, it is my fault.” Peter apologized.

“No it’s cool, I distracted you then snapped.” You sighed. Peter ran out and put your shirt in the laundry machine and came back. 

“I’m guessing no more strawberries?” Peter grinned. 

“Unless you want me to keep wearing your stuff.” You gave him another kiss on the lips. “But we need to focus on what we are going to do about May?”

Peter put the bowl of strawberries back into the fridge. “What about saying it in passing, like not making a whole big deal about it?”

You jumped up onto the countertop. “I guess, but what if she thinks we’re not serious that way- we are serious right?”

Peter came in between your legs and nodded. “As serious as possible. So should we just say we started going out over dinner or something?”

“What if we do it over text?” You leaned your head on Peter’s. “Just drop the ball there so we don’t have to deal with her when the news is super fresh.”

“But isn’t that a little impersonal? She could think it’s a prank too.” He sighed. He started wrapping his hands around you but you pulled back. “Don’t worry there is no strawberry on my hands.”

You pushed him back and jumped down. “The counter is not really that comfy.” 

Peter dragged you back to the couch in the living room. You leaned on it first and Peter laid in between your legs, his head resting on your stomach. You both pulled your phones out, googling plans on what to do.

“Wikihow says to write it out.” You huffed. “What kind of bull shit is that?”

“How did you tell your parents?” Peter looked back to you and you bit your lip.

“I don’t think I actually did.” You laughed. “I think they still think that we are just friends.”

“Friends that talk a lot about each other and want to hang out all the time?”

“Hey! It’s not like you told Aunt May about us!” You lightly kicked him with your foot and went back to scrolling. “Did you even find anything yet?”

“No, it’s all the same, they don't even give you a script, they just say that you should do it when they’re in a good mood. Like come on, that's the most obvious thing.” Peter groaned. 

“What if she finds out through Ned or Mj? That way we aren’t the ones that are telling her.” You suggested. 

“But Mj’s just gonna call us pussies and Ned is terrified of angry May.” Peter grumbled. 

“Angry May? When was May angry?”

“Remember when we were on our way back from Coney Island a couple years ago before we could drive?”

“Ohh I remember that! She was not that bad, she was just yelling at the driver in front of us though, that was nothing.” 

“Ned just hates any type of confrontation. That’s why he’s my guy in the chair.”

“I still can’t believe you still call him that.” You laughed. “He hasn't been helping you since he got with Betty.”

“Wait! How did Ned tell us?” Peter asked, turning around so he was laying on his stomach.

“He just came up to us holding hands with her and said they just got together.” You shrugged. “But we’ve been dating for almost a year, she’ll wonder why we didn’t tell her.”

“Fuck.” Peter dropped his head into the couch and groaned. 

“Maybe you were right. We should just do it passively. Like tomorrow over breakfast?” You suggested. “Just mention we are going on a date tomorrow like it's nothing.”

Peter lifted his head up and crawled over so he was over you. He had a dopey smile on his face. “Deal.”

~~

A couple of hours and two pizza boxes later you and Peter were snuggled up on his bed under the covers. You were watching the movie Peter mentioned earlier and it was enjoyable. Though, you couldn’t tell if the movie was good because of the plot and characters or if it was just because you were with Peter.

He had his arms hugging you on your waist and his head was leaning on your shoulder. Your head was leaning the side of his as your hand was in his hair. Your legs were tangled underneath the covers with his. 

Normally, Peter comments about the plot, characters, or costume choice when watching a movie. But tonight he was being awfully quiet. You lent your head forward to check on him and his eyes were shut and his breathing was steady. 

You quietly paused the movie playing on his laptop and stealthily put it on the floor next to the bed without moving too much to wake him. 

You shifted a bit, laying down more so you were comfier. Peter shifted a bit, subconsciously adjusting to your movements. “Can you stay here?” Peter mumbled. 

“Mhm.” You hummed, cuddling more into Peter. And without any more thought, you shut your eyes. 

~~

May had a long shift at the hospital. Annoying patients and even more annoying doctors bothering her to do every little thing. 

But she was happy to be home, to see her nephew and you, though you were both probably fast asleep by now. The sun was barely starting to rise and when she saw Peter after school, he looked half dead so she knew he was going to fall asleep soon.

Unlocking the door and kicking her shoes off quietly, she expected to see Peter sleeping on the couch. But when she looked over, the couch was bare. Raising a brow, she headed over to Peter’s door.

Peter's heart started beating faster, and he felt like his body was falling. Blowing it off as a draft making his sense go off, he moved a bit, holding you closer and let out a happy sigh. He didn’t even register that you were staying in his bed, it felt normal, it felt peaceful, it felt right.

He also didn’t happen to notice his hand conveniently place on your left boob.

Peter’s door swung open, “WHAT THE FUCK!?” Peter jumped up, his senses going crazy. Your eyes blinked open, you saw Peter staring at something and following his gaze you saw Aunt May standing in the doorway. He ripped his hand away from your chest and held them up. You quickly sat up, trying your best to look normal in the compromising position. 

“May, it’s not what it looks like.” Peter said worriedly. You could tell he was scared, his hands were shaking, and his eyes were wide like his spider-man goggles. 

“Oh really? Because it looks like you two slept together under my roof.” May barked. 

“May, please we didn’t-”

“Oh my god Y/n, you’re not pregnant right? I’m too young to be a grandmother and Peter can barely take care of himself how could deal with another kid, oh fuck. Please tell me you were both safe, that's all I ask.” May exclaimed. 

Times like these you could seriously tell how Peter and May are related. Though May doesn’t seem like the anxious type -unlike Peter- certain things could trigger it. And apparently you two fast asleep in the same bed was one. 

“May we didn’t have sex! We just fell asleep cuddling! Nothing happened!” Peter clarified. 

You hurriedly nodded your head. “Yeah! Peter and I were watching a movie and then we fell asleep! We didn’t do anything!” 

“Oh really?” May’s voice did a complete 180. You both just shook your heads. “If I was alone with my boyfriend at your age, we most definitely would have-”

“Ew May, please no.” Peter collapsed on the bed again, face first. Clearly wanting this moment to be over.

“What do you mean if you were with your boyfriend?” You chimed in. 

“Well as a couple I would have thought you both would have too!” May explained. “No adult and all alone-”

“You knew we were dating?” Peter interrupted, sitting up again, most definitely not wanting to hear the rest of that sentence.

“Of course, I know you both didn’t say anything so I thought you were ready to tell me yet and I respect that. I was just scared because I thought you were usafe.” May answered, shrugging her shoulders. 

“How did you know?” Peter wondered. “I thought we were good at covering it up.”

“Oh y/n was good at keeping it quiet. But I found out when you were on the phone with Ned a few months ago.” May started. “But even before that I should've guessed you were a couple during your homecoming dance. You both were very.. touchy, for just being ‘just friends’.”

Yours and Peter's mouth dropped at what you heard. Peter let out a breath. “So you’re not mad that we are together and didn’t tell you?”

“I promise we were going to tell you at breakfast.” You added

“I’m not mad at anything. I know how you kids are. I promise I was just scared that you were both being unsafe.” May laughed. Both you and Peter looked at each other. “I respect your boundaries. Remember, I’m the cool aunt.” She smiled and grabbed the door handle. “Night, lovebirds.”

She shut the door, leaving you and Peter wide awake.

Peter rolled over then just looked at you. “Did you tell her she was the cool aunt?”

You sighed. “Don’t worry I already regret it.”

Peter and you laughed but the laughter quickly died down. “What the fuck just happened?”

“Let’s never talk about it ever again.” You decided. Peter nodded and yawned. 

“Of course.” Peter agreed. “We can deal with everything tomorrow. I just want cuddles now.” He wrapped his arms around you again, a little more needier than before.

You happily sighed and kissed his cheek. “Love you Pete.”

“Love you too.” Peter hummed. A few minutes passed but Peter couldn’t quite fall asleep, worrying about tomorrow. “What's going to happen when we see May tomorrow?”

You thought for a moment, stifling a yawn. “Die of embarrassment probably.”

[theonekid123]

Why Don’t You Wanna Fuck Me?

Levi Ackerman X Reader

Summary: Y/N sleeps around with a lot of people but seems to steer clear of Levi, He’s unsure why so he tries to figure the mystery out.

Chapter 1

“Wake up!” that was the first thing i heard in the morning

“Fucking shit why would you do that?!” i yelled after i hit my head on the back board

“Sorry but you slept in and Hange needs your help with some experiment” Reiner told me looking tired, i mean he probably was after…..anyway

“Ok, can you hand me my clothes please '' I asked, rubbing my eyes and stretching. A stack of clothes was placed in front of me

“Can we maybe not talk about what happened last night” He asked looking concerned, I assume because he has a thing for Christa

“Have I ever fucked and told Reiner?” i asked as i put my clothes on

“No, sorry” he gave an awkward apology he stood there until i was done getting dressed

“Where’s Hange”

“With Sawney and Bean '' I don't know why I asked where else would she be. When I first joined the Corps Hange sorta recruited me as her assistant she had Moblit so im not to sure why but i nevr questioned it. If i'm being honest Hange and Moblit are my closest friends. Even if i almost die everytime i help that maniac.

“See you later Reiner '' I gave him a small wave as I went to see what Hange needed now.

“Y/N finally!” Moblit practically screamed walking towards you

“Jeez what did she do this time,,” I asked still slightly out of it from just waking up

“It's kind of complicated,” he said, dragging me to the tent where Hange usually did her research.

“Hange what the fuck did you do,” I said walking through the tent opening. That was when I realized there were other soldiers in the tent. Oh shit

“Section commander Hange, what the fuck did you do” I tried to correct myself to not seem disrespectful but the solders still looked at me like I was being disrespectful...oops

“Y/N good to see you let me run through the progress and notes from my previous experiment” Hange said exited while shuffling the stack of paper in her hands.

Four long hours later she concluded her speech. All the other soldiers exited the tent leaving just me Hange and Moblit.

“I'm not too sure Commander Erwin would want to hear you speak about your brand new discovery for 4 hours Hange,” I told her as I looked through her messy notes

“Your right Y/N...which is why I am asking you to summarize them for me,” she said

“Ok, Do you know how long this will take Hange?” it was a sincere question.If anyone could estimate it would be her.

“Dependson how much time you work on it” she said simply

“Why can't you or Moblit do it” it wasn’t that i didn't want to help my friend i just wasn't the biggest fan of paperwork

“We have an expedition in two days and we won't be back for at least a week” Moblit explained, Helping Hange pack some stuff for the expedition. 

“Alright i'll do it as long as you two don”t die or something” i said folding the papers and putting them in my pocket

“Thank you Y/N” Moblit said while Hange slid into the chair across from me

“What?'' I asked as she stared at me with a quizzical look.

“Was it good?” she asked leaning her chin on her hand 

“For fucks sake Hange, why do you want to know '' her and Moblit were the only one i talked to about my late night activities, bit only if they, Hange, initiated the conversation.

“I'm just a caring friend, and i want to know” she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world

“He was ok, could probably use some more practice though” i said picking the skin surrounding my fingernails. 

“I thought he had a thing going on with that tall kid, what's his name?” Moblit joined the conversation. He hides it but we all know he loves some good gossip

“Bertholdt. He also has a thing for Christa” i know they won't go around telling everyone about this stuff so i'm not too cautious letting them know.

“Have you tried Erwin?'' Hange asked nonchalantly. I choked on my saliva

“Erwin?! The Commander?! Hange im not trying to get kicked out” maybe i was overreacting. I've slept with plenty of  higher ups but the idea of trying with the Commander scared me.

“He won't kick you out in fact he might be happy he can let loose a little” she said with a smirk on her face

“I have paperwork to do,” I said, ending the conversation while I got up and left the tent.

“Sleep with the commander, she really is crazy” i say to myself as i walk to by room

.

.

.

“Does it seem ok?” I asked Hange as I gave her the finished product of the notes. She took a minute to look though it before speaking

“It looks perfect, how long did it take you?” she asked handing it back to me

“I finished it last night, i went through a lot of drafts before i got it down” i worked on it everyday till it was perfect. I rewrote it probably 20 times.

“Can you please give it to Erwin, I have to help unpack everything,” Hange said, walking off.

Maybe i’ll take Hange’s advice after all

“Good evening Commander Erwin, here’s the paperwork from Section Commander Hange,” I said putting the paperwork on his desk

“Please tell Hange I said thank you,” he replied as he started to briefly look through the paperwork

“Aren't you going to leave Scout,” He asked still looking at the papers

“You haven’t dismissed me, it would be disrespectful if I just left” I explained, I wasn’t interested in being respectful, I was just trying to be slick. After a moment of silence, I spoke up

“If I may ask, are you frustrated Commander?” he looked up from the paper, his eyes full of curiosity, this was my chance.

“Why do you ask Scout?” he asked looking back at the paper

“I was just curious, a lot of people seem to be overly frustrated lately, and since there aren’t too many ways to relieve said stress….” I trail off hoping he understands my implication. He put the paper down and looked up with the smallest smirk

“Are you frustrated Scout?” he asked, his voice dropping a few octaves and damn was it attractive

“If I were to say no then I’d be lying Commander” Hey, at least I was being honest

“Ok, well why don’t we help each other out,,” he said pushing out of his chair and circling his desk to stand in front of me 

“If that's what you wish, commander, I will follow your orders” I was trying not to act like I was too excited. Sometimes I like to toy with men's emotions, letting them think I'm not into it even though I am. He stepped close and looked at my lips then back up to my eyes. I took the chance to initiate the first move, which would lead to many more. He was a good kisser I must admit. Unfortunately, we were interrupted when a knock was heard at his door. He pulled away heading to the door saying something about maybe letting whoever it was join. I don't know if he was joking but hey the more the merrier

“Hello, what can I do for you Captain Levi” Levi...great fucking wonderful.

“May I be dismissed, Commander Erwin?” I asked, turning and walking towards the door. He looked confused.

“Yes Scout, thank you for the paperwork,” He said as I walked passed him and Captain Levi

[ratcandy]

hi MASSIVE TOH SEASON 3 EPISODE 1 SPOILERS below don't read if haven't watched I am about to go off my rocker

also abuse tw mention because 😦

first of all FLAPJACK. I proceed to punch a wall

I did not expect to actually start bawling my eyes out but hot damn what the fuck . Why is Flapjack dying what got me above everything else in this show. Like I've gotten teary and emotional over other moments but Flapjack dying and all of Hunter's dialogue that proceeded it just made me SOB ??????????????

Also hello fluid as fuck animation in that fight scene 😳 i misse d you

so anyway. Now we gotta talk about possessed!Hunter right. While that's a bombass design and I love the look of it and his body language in the fluid parts of the animation is impeccable, it's also incredibly. URGH. NO I don't LIKE it. No I HATE it, actually. There's something just . Incomprehensibly genuinely upsetting about Hunter's former abuser taking over his body and using it to kill his emotional support animal

it's SO fucked up and I'm all for horrible twisted shit but also for fuck's sake man can Hunter get a fucking break!!! Can he like!!! Be free for two minutes!!!!!

I think it just feels like such a consecutive gut punch because we're missing so much extra filler and that's what makes me all the more sad. You can TELL you can TASTE how much more they wanted to expand on this, how much more there was to elaborate on, but they just didn't have the time and so Hunter Really Going Thru It yet again just feels like . got dam he really did not get a single break my guy can't even REST!!! it feels to me like he's just constantly through the ringer because it's all we've been able to see and that SUCKS

but they make a whole point of saying he has been happier in the human realm ("you've smiled so much since we got here" from Gus, something along those lines) . They want us to know he Has been happy for the past few months, there HAS been a break. n I feel like that was their way of trying to say ,,, Look See he's been at semi-sorta-peace for a little while! He's gone without Unspeakable Horrors for like a FEW MONTHS , we promise, we swear, it's not consecutive unending pain, he's been Pretty Good for a while (ignoring identity crises that we also unfortunately can't elaborate on because of time but you saw a little glimpse of it in that intro sequence). and NOW we're just making him Worse

but still like AUUGHhghsgghh. I don't Like the further implications of Any of the possession stuff mannnnn ughurhghgrh

AND ALSO FLAPJACK i punch the wall again FUCK!!!

anyway expanding on Flapjack a little . So when Belos did his whole fucking thing, he said "goodbye Evalyn," and we see during the whole Hayride sequence that Evalyn gave Caleb Flapjack (or taught him to make Flapjack).

For a moment, though, I was mortified misunderstanding that Flapjack was Evalyn, even if that wouldn't make any sense ghsdgkJHSDG

oh also we know Evalyn's name now. Yea that's a thing. We know the name of the witch that Caleb fell in love with or whatever. And honestly. I had to stop after I heard that and go "aawww maaan" because. C'mon. looks at the camera

Evalyn? Edalyn? Not even Tryin to hide that they're related huh

Mngmrh this is a personal gripe of mine, but honestly I really hoped the theory about "the witch Caleb loved being an ancestor of the Clawthorne's" wasn't canon sdhgkh it just . Again this is personal bias. I have never liked the cliché of "you've been related this whole time!" kinda thing. Different when the antagonist and protagonist are set up as related from the start. I don't like when it's a plot twist or anything like that. it's so. m.

just not really my thing n I'm a little disappointed to get lowkey confirmation that it's probably canon sdghskjdghsdghkl because almost inevitably it'll be revealed in a whole dramatic thing and it'll be like RelATed TO BEloS THIS WHOle Time ?!? !? and i'll be like I Do Not See It

Well all that aside. Holds Camila in my hands. mom of the year award you deserve the entire world

[jinkicake]

Love You Like I Can

Hinata, Kenma, Tendou when their darling finally breaks up with their s/o.

Hinata Shouyou x Reader

Kozume Kenma x Reader

Tendou Satori x Reader

Anon, I apologize, I kinda branched off into something much darker than you maybe intended,,,,,, I couldn’t help myself/still can’t believe I wrote this LOL........ For those wondering what my Feitan writings are like, it is like this but much worse,,,,, sigh. Also! Please let me know if I forgot to tag a tw, I think I got it all,,,,

SMUT // NSFW

TW : heavy implications of yandere themes, stalking, kidnapping, sadistic/masochist behavior, dubcon (kinda),,, 

Take this into consideration before you read ^^^

WC- 2,171

~~~

Hinata Shouyou

Do you know Yoosung from Mystic Messenger,,,, LOL I think you guys know where I am going with this,,, Yoosung is the same type of yandere that Hinata would be like…. In this situation/in my mind

Hinata is so sweet and pure that it almost seems unreal for him to be possessive and protective,,,, not to mention obsessive and controlling,,,, so you never see it coming

Pls, if he sees you talking to any guy that isn’t him ,,,,, or any person even,,,, I think he would get really riled up 

He’d want to be with you always and be the only one that you’re thinking about…. 

Hinata just reminds me of that soft boy™ who would turn out to be a mf yandere type….. 

Let’s say you go to Shiratorizawa and you know Hinata from volleyball,,, bc your s/o also plays volleyball. When word gets out that you and your s/o break up, Hinata would be the first to comfort you and would be so supportive with everything you do

Then it kinda goes to shit because one minute you’re drinking something and then the next you’re waking up in an unknown room that you’ve never seen before. You’re all tied up and can barely move, can barely focus on what is even in the room

When you finally wake up Hinata is so happy and he still has that exciting energy he always has,, he’s like ‘ah I’ve been waiting for ten hours and now you’re finally awake!!!!’ And if you try to ask like where you are and stuff, Hinata would just say some bs like ‘you’re with me?’

This mf,,,,, I feel like when he tortures you, he kinda twists it into a way that it makes it seem like he is doing it for your own benefit. Like him carving his initials into your skin is to protect you and for everyone to know who you belong to, that sorta thing

Hinata would put all his energy into showing you why you belong with him, why you two need to be together, he’d probably punish you for not seeing it sooner and that’s where the angry sex comes in….

“Didn’t you know I was there for you all along?” Hinata asks curiously, still thrusting three of his fingers inside of you while ignoring the muffled whines and cries that leave your lips. “Why did it take you so long to come to me?” He continues to ask, a frown taking up his face as he voices his thoughts. His fingers inside of you once brought pleasure but now they are bringing pain, he has made you cum five times and has not once stopped. Your walls are feeling so stretched and every touch to your clit feels like you’re being shocked with electricity, it hurts. “Don’t you realize how much I love you? Why not me? Am I not good enough for you?” 

His orange hair dips as his frustration oozes out of him and he flicks his wrist as he curls his fingers inside of you, dragging along your walls to find that one spot. 

“You’re all mine now, I don’t have to worry anymore, right?” He growls and stares at you, his eyebrows furrowed and the dark look on his face makes him look unrecognizable. 

“You don’t have to worry anymore, Shouyo-“ You cry, and your back arches into the air as he finally drags his fingers along that spot. 

“Good, good.” He sighs happily and uses his other hand to rub your clit with four of his fingers. “I love you (Y/N), I love you so much and now you’re all mine!” 

Hinata’s eyes light up with need as he stares at your swollen clit getting tortured underneath his fingers, his mouth waters at the sight of your cum spilling down his wrist. Hinata sticks his tongue out of his mouth in concentration as he repeatedly snaps his wrist to thrust his curled fingers along your walls and his mouth drops out when you squirt all over him. 

“You must love me so much, don’t you (Y/N)?” Hinata asks you and you don’t have the nerve to tell him that you hadn’t just cum, not when he is like this. His orange hair dips once again between your thighs as he mutters to himself. “It is so obvious, how did I never notice before.”

Kozume Kenma 

Now,,, with Kenma….. I think his feelings would be really dormant for a while,,,, like he would always have these obsessive tendencies with you but he would be able to control it and hide it

He’d become your friend and gain your trust,,, then stick cameras in your room when you’re not watching so then he can always know what you’re doing 

Kenma is the type where your friends would joke about him having a little crush on you and you’d all laugh it off but in reality,,, Kenma is obsessed with you…. He doesn’t simply have a crush on you,,, he is in love with you

And as soon as you break up with your s/o, all his restraint will fly out the window. He will have zero problems taking you back to his own apartment/room and keep you there,,,,, Kenma does this in a way so that it makes you think you have control over the situation like you’re going to his place because you want to

He kinda reminds me of 707 type yandere you know? I don’t know why I keep referring to mystic messenger character but it helps me write this so…. 

Kenma won’t pay any attention to you or give you any attention but just simply having you in the same room as him makes him feel calmer, he lets you talk or rant for as long as you like,,, he is very manipulative with this whole thing

However, when Kenma finally has enough of you talking about your stupid ex s/o that he cannot stand ,,,, he will shut you up

Cue him kissing you and shit~,,, this will go from 0 to 100 real quick like what you think is your ‘friend’ trying to make you feel better will turn into Kenma’s dormant feelings exploding with every touch

All his previous feelings of rejection and just an obsessive need to make you his will surface,,, but he does it in such a way that it isn’t that intense and you’re into it…… even if he has an entire closet filled with sex toys that he wants to use on you 

Kenma will leave physical marks on you….. You’re not coming out of this the same, no, he has a hold on you now and he is never going to let go 

“Kenma!” You cry out as his slender cock rubs along your walls, his arms tighten around you and you moan again at the feeling of his warm skin.

“I can fuck you so much better than they could,” He whispers into your ear as he twists your leg up into an odd angle, one that makes it easier for him to dive deeper into you but also makes your muscle scream in pain. 

“W-what?” You ask, unable to focus on what Kenma is saying due to heat taking over your body. 

“You never moaned like this with them before,” Kenma mentally notes and begins to bite down on your neck, letting his thin hair tickle your jaw. “I’m going to show you how much I care about you.” 

You can only nod at his words, even if you have zero clues what he is saying, it doesn’t really matter when he’s fucking you this good. It’s like you can’t even remember your own name.

“You like that, don’t you?” He coos in amazement and tests his theory as he sits up on the back of his calves, holding you up by your waist with your legs draped over his shoulders, practically fucking you upside down. This new angle makes you feel everything, and the gravitational pull on your breasts makes you grab onto them which brings a new wave of pleasure.

“Oh, Kenma I’ve never been fucked like this before,” You mewl happily and take pleasure in the way he is quite literally rearranging your guts. Kenma smirks to himself and digs his nails into your waist, watching as you wince slightly.

“I know, I know.” He mutters quietly and continues to smack his hips into your ass, watching with heavily lust-filled eyes at the way you squirm at the sting. “What kind of filthy whore likes this kind of play?” Kenma wonders in amusement, the deep crescent moon shapes are left into your skin by his nails and Kenma starts to wonder what exactly else he can get away with you.

Tendou Satori 

Tendou,,,, ah,,, I kept thinking about this one for a while…… 

He would somehow always be able to keep tabs on you,,, even if you’re not really friends and if you go to different schools. Whether it be that he just always keeps himself updated on your social media or hears a lot about you, 

Any aspect of your life… Tendou will somehow know about it without you even realizing it… He also is very attentive with your s/o too and always keeps tabs on them as well and very soon it turns into an obsession like Tendou has to have you 

Tendou wants you so badly and all to himself, to the point that he can’t hold himself back and he needs to talk to you 

Even if you go to different schools Tendou will coincidentally run into you, it is so perfect that you’d never expect that every minor detail was planned, and he slowly builds up your friendship from there

Tendou seems like the type to be very clingy and always touching you but not to the point where you’re weirded out by it,,,, he does it in a way that you genuinely come to like…. You and your s/o probably break up because of Tendou 

I feel like Tendou would manipulate his actions so that you genuinely fall for him,,,, which works perfectly for him because now he has you all to himself

It’s like a flip is switched and Tendou goes from your caring friend to the possessive person he is, all his feelings come pouring out and he can’t help the way he treats you

I feel like when you cry it turns him on so he wants to see your tears when he fucks you,,,, Tendou plans everything he does and manipulates every aspect so you start to enjoy it and you think it is just some hot sex when really….. it is just Tendou showing you everything he feels for you 

You are literally his after this,,,, Tendou is not going to let you go,,,, and you wouldn’t want it any other way

Your elbows give out after a particularly hard thrust and you fall face-first into the mattress. Tendou grins and cockily rolls his shoulders back before pressing on the back of your head with his palm to shove your face into the sheets. You can barely fucking breathe but with the way Tendou is slapping his hips into your ass and the way his balls are deliciously slamming into your clit, you don’t care.

“You’ve always wanted my attention, haven’t you?” Tendou spits and narrows his eyes down at you. “You always wanted me to fuck you like this, I know how much you like me.” He throws out into the air and if you could nod, you would. “That little Seijoh boy can’t fuck you like this? Can he?” Tendou mocks and you moan loudly at his words. “If only he could see you now, see how good I am fucking you.”

Tendou brings his hand down to slap your ass, the arch in your back has your ass practically shoved into his face. His grin only widens when he sees how your ass jiggles for him and how each thrust has your tits slapping your face. 

“Tell me I’m the biggest cock you’ve ever had.” He twists your hair around his fist and yanks your neck so that your face is slightly up again. You take in a deep breath of fresh air and whine loudly. 

“Yes,” You cry and Tendou raises an eyebrow before slapping your ass again, laughing at the way tears fall down your face at the sting. 

“Yes, what?” He asks darkly and places his had right against your spine, right above your ass before pressing down hard. The pressure makes you sob even harder and you whimper at the pain.

“You have the b-biggest cock I’ve ever had.” You repeat and relax into the sheets when he starts fucking you again, the fast pace is something you refuse to try and even keep up with so you lay against the sheets with your eyes closed.

“Don’t fall asleep on me now (Y/N), we aren’t even close to being done.”

~

Taglist.

@yams046 @why-am-i-sad-and-sleepy @xhanjisungiex @xxashshs @chaosamu @angelkogane @augustdearly @kunimwuah  @lovellucy @osamuonigiri @pearzuko @darksxder

[rotshop]

short """hcs""" if u can call them that ,,, ts just liek a thought in bullet point form for ease ,,,

n e way sanford + an upset s/o

[ could be read as platonic or romantic | tw for some mental stuff i guess ? ]

- he's perceptive as fuck honestly he just . doesn't say much abt what he notices. he just takes mental note of it and kinda acts accordingly. hank seems just slightly more heavy in his steps?? try and keep outta their zone and let them cool down for a while. 2b keeps quickly pausing in his words n motions??? try and be patient and also maybe make some little implication he should get some rest

- he just . notices things. <:) it b like that

- so . he most definitely notices somethings off with you. you're more tense and on edge like any little movement or noise could snap you in half. you just. aren't in your element at all.

- plus like it doesn't really even matter if he noticed before hand with how you tear up and press your balled hands against your eyes harshly to prevent the tears. he hadn't really seen what'd been the thing to set you off, and in all honesty it didn't really matter to him much in the moment with his tunnel vision on helping you.

- he's rlly rlly sure to keep his voice a lot softer than usual. he knows he can b pretty loud without really noticing so he rlly makes an effort to try and . not be that . he'll ask you a few questions but if ur not super responsive at first he'll just wait a little while before trying again.

- if ur the type who doesn't rlly like being touched then he'll do his best to give you a little bit of extra personal space , he's not the greatest with comforting words and it shows pretty clearly but .. he tries . if he cant do that then at the very least he can listen to you and hear you out if you so choose, or he can simply offer some sort of company in the moment

- if you are ok w/ or it helps then he'll pull you pretty close to him, puts one of is hands on the back of your head and pulls ur face to the crook of his neck n just keeps you pulled up against his torso. he' s pretty warm and his arms provide some sort of weight / pressure around u so it s pretty nice ,,,,,,,,,,,

- if you end up falling asleep dw he'll carry u real easy ,,, if you wake up on the way at all he just hushes you and insists you get some rest for a little while . actively tries to deter anyone from going near ur room or bugging you so you can sleep in a little while (dw he's actually !! pretty convincing actor when he needs to be !! that and those who can see through it you either trust with this sorta thing or he's able to distract somehow . either which way dw abt it he's not gonna go telling everyone)

- makes a point to check on you the next day / when you get up and kinda just . keeps on doing it. gives you space ofc but you should still expect him to come up to you and ask how you're doin at one point or another. also will ask if you've drank water or eaten anything recently , if not then guess who's getting carried under his arm like a sack of flour to the kitchen lmao

[yayninjabob]

Hi, I loved your story “Villain.” The characterization of everyone was really great, especially for Buttercup’s transformation into Joey. You feel bad for them, but you also feel for their family.

As for episodes in the classic series that show the girls darker sides, I didn’t have a problem with “A Very Special Blossom.” She had sympathetic motivations, and everyone understood where she was coming for in the end. However, she still got a fair punishment.

“Bubblevicious” was a good episode, but Bubbles got off way too easily for her crimes, in my opinion.

I wish Buttercup’s motivations in “Moral Decay” had been a bit more sympathetic than “I want to earn money by knocking out teeth just because,” but I do understand that the writers were trying to go for the greed addiction metaphor. While a lot of us in the fandom complain about her descent into villainy feeling contrived and OOC in “Moral Decay,” I think most of us could have accepted her getting punished for her crimes by having her teeth knocked out by every villain in the city, if the writers hadn’t chosen to involve Blossom and Bubbles in the set up, had them enjoy it, then made even Professor Utonium come across as being very uncharacteristically indifferent in regards to one of his daughters being hurt as comeuppance for her crimes, and then framed that as “okay.” Are we supposed to believe he knows what Blossom and Bubbles did to Buttercup, and he’s okay with that? It’s just entirely OOC for him, even if Buttercup is the low-key black sheep of the family, and Buttercup’s a character with superpowers, living in a cartoon with over-the top physical violence that they generally endure and fully recover from very quickly 99.9% of the time.

It’s not entirely clear if Blossom and Bubbles revealed to Professor that THEY were involved in the set up of Buttercup’s downfall at the end of “Moral Decay,” but they apparently told him about what she did shortly before that beat down they lured her into from the villains because he found her stash of coins. The fact that he doesn’t seem more concerned about Buttercup’s downfall, though, and Blossom and Bubbles aren’t punished implies unfortunate things, though, none of which are within his character.

I also just find it baffling that Professor Utonium wouldn’t feel at least partially guilty for Buttercup’s crimes and ultimate downfall since she had to have been doing this for at least 7-10 days behind their backs in “Moral Decay,” and he failed to notice what was happening before it was too late and she got hurt.

If the writers of “Moral Decay” had gone for the same resolution of Buttercup getting her teeth knocked out as comeuppance for her crimes by all the villains in the city in a cruel twist of fate without involving either of her sisters in the set up, then had the two of them and Professor Utonium still being understandably angry and disappointed in her for her crimes, but also sorry that she got hurt, I think fans would have felt a lot less pissed off. I know Buttercup’s always sort of been the low-key black sheep of the family, but it had never felt like her family hated her either. At the end of “Moral Decay,” it felt like she was hated, and that’s what made most fans feel pissed off. Yeah, Buttercup’s relationships with her sisters and her dad weren’t perfect, but it had never felt like she was this horribly abused, mistreated, neglected, or unloved child by her family either. I think “Moral Decay” gave off some unfortunate implications to fans that she kind of was in that episode at least, and I can’t totally disagree with them.

Yeah, Buttercup deserved punishment for her crimes, but I don’t think it was necessary to drag the entire Utonium family’s good reputation through the mud in “Moral Decay” to do it either.

Yo, I'm gonna be honest and admit that I quite like the episode "Moral Decay" haha.

You're not wrong though and I have seen this episode criticized by lots of fans that point out what you mention, so you're definitely not alone in that opinion. I guess I am just old school and I grew up with cartoons that were often just randomly OOC, over the top and the world would magically reset after some insane episodes- but personally it isn't a negative for me. I enjoy when shows- cartoons especially- don't take themself too seriously. I appreciate the "how far can we take this" approach- and if not in cartoons then where else is it appropriate to push the boundaries? Probably a little better done in the episode Down n Dirty but I still enjoy the episode for what it is.

Lazy or bad writing is different and I just don't think MD is an episode with lazy or bad writing. It's not my most favorite episode but I definitely get my lols from it haha and there are definitely worse episodes in the series. As a kid I would yank my own teeth out the moment I felt them going lose eager to get that tooth fairy cash once I realized it was a thing and so I personally enjoy that that sorta childhood phase was shown in this episode. Personally I always like episodes that show the puffs going through kid stuff but with the fun twist of having superpowers. Is it over the top? Yeah. Totally. But that montage with Buttercup knocking Bubbles at every turn gets a laugh from me every time haha- just the visual of Buttercup's slow reach while Bubbles is coloring before slamming her head onto the table- hilarious to me. I'm sorry haha but it gets me every time. 😅

Buttercup's treatment as "the black sheep" comes up elsewhere in the series and not just this episode. All of which lend to the inspiration for my fic "Villain" for sure. I am glad to hear you enjoy the story and that you feel the sympathy equally for Buttercup/Joey and their family. It definitely is an aim of mine to avoid portraying just one side as totally good or totally bad- Well... Except of course HIM haha. He's straight up evil.

Thanks for reading! And thanks so much for the ask and for sharing your thoughts! It is definitely fun to delve a little deeper into these episodes sometimes. :D

[smol-baguett]

We need to talk about Susan Pevensie

ok quick rant. 

I read all the Chronicles of Narnia books when I was little except the last one for no reason that I can think of, but I finally got around to reading it this weekend

anywho

I was left in utter shock after reading the last chapter. I really could’ve taken a hint earlier. “Oh  hey look. Mr. Tumnus, who’s dead is here. Caspian, who is also dead is here. Reepicheep and Fledge are here.” Lewis even describes the place as a Christian’s heaven as Jewel says,

 “I have come at last! This is my real country! I belong here. This is the land  I have been looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now.” 

Geez I could’ve taken a hint when I knew THEY WERE IN ASLAN’S COUNTRY WHICH IS BASICALLY HEAVEN. YOU GO TO HEAVEN WHEN YOU’RE DEAD. THEY’RE ALL DEAD. But no. tbh I was so distracted with the precious reunion of Lucy and Mr. Tumnus <3 that I completely forgot  what was going on. It wasn’t until Aslan was like “Oh no there was an actual train accident, y’alls’s ded rip” WHAT?!

But now I can’t stop wondering: What about Susan?

She grew up and ruled as queen in Narnia with her sibling for 15 years. She had a life there. And then she was suddenly back to her puny teenage self. Back to “reality”. Even when she went back to Narnia, she believed it wouldn’t last and that she would have to move on to “real life” again. 

Now in the last book, she isn’t there at all. She has no faith in Aslan or Narnia anymore. They were absolutely right in saying she thinks she has grown up. She puts material things and temporary pleasures over what was her and her siblings’ reality for FIFTEEN YEARS. Ever the theologian, Lewis was using her character to convey what happens to those who stop believing, and put temporary pleasures before God. (pardon my Catholicism but C.S. Lewis was a theologian and used a lot of Christian analogies in the themes and characters) Susan is no longer a friend of Narnia, and so she doesn’t get to join her family and friends in Aslan’s Country. In Christianity, those who don’t have faith in God or don’t uphold Jesus’ beatitudes, aren’t welcome in the Kingdom of Heaven. 

Religious implications aside...

It just feels weird that everyone is together and happy in Narnia except her. I understand that her character since TLTWATW has always been a bit skeptical of Narnia and the first to accept the reality of “normal life”, but still. The story of the four sibling, the four kings and queens of Narnia began with her along with her brothers and sister. Their journey starts with all four of them, so why doesn’t it end with all four of them? 

Not only her brothers and sister, but her parent were killed in a tragic train accident. She distanced herself from her family so she could feel independent and grown up. She abandoned her memories of her time in Narnia and moved on with a life she believed she belonged to. 

And now her entire family is dead.

They’re all (including the parents) in Narnia with all their friends but without her.  No, she is all alone in plain ol’ earth mourning the sudden and tragic slaughter of her entire family. 

But what happens to her??

Does she blame herself for their deaths? Does she regret not sharing her memories of Narnia with her siblings and reminiscing of her life there with her family? Does she regain her faith? Does Aslan forgive her and ask her to come back? And does she reunite with her family in Narnia?

We don’t know because Lewis gives us  n o t h i n g. 

He does, however, give us his dedication to his goddaughter, Lucy, in TLTWATW, as this video provides. From Lewis’s words, 

“As a result you are already too old for fairy tales, and by the time it is printed and bound you will be older still. But some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again.”

Clearly Lewis was referencing this when he wrote Susan. She thinks she’s too old for fantasies like Narnia. Too old to long for being a queen, riding a horse through a forest, or having dinner with talking animals. But one day, hopefully  soon after her family’s deaths, she realizes that she was never too old for that stuff. She’ll want to go back to Narnia. She’ll regain her faith in Aslan and they’ll welcome her back. 

But, of course, we won’t know. I have recently learned that Lewis was planning on writing a book about what happens to Susan, but he passed away before he could. While that is unfortunate, I’m sorta glad there was no sequel or definite conclusion to her story. In The Last Battle he left her story up to interpretation, for us readers to fantasize on our own. It leaves us theorizers and fanfic writers with the freedom to speculate and make our own conclusions of what happens to Susan. 

So now I’m gonna drown myself in fanfiction to satisfy my need for answers. gn.

[unovamemes]

Does N have autism?

(Does this belong on my main? I dunno, I sorta want to keep all my Pokémon BW stuff on this account so that my main doesn’t become a Pokémon BW blog when it was supposed to be for art)

I’m not sure how many people have thought this before, but N shows a lot of signs of autism, and it lead me to a theory that N might be on the spectrum. If this was the case, it’s explain a lot about N’s story.

Here’s some of the evidence to support this theory, and if you noticed anything else hinting to it feel free to comment!  Oh, and this is written by someone who actually has autism so please don’t go commenting “PEOPLE WITH AUTISM WOULDN’T DO THAT!!!”, because it doesn’t work that way. It’s called a SPECTRUM for a reason.

-So, one of the biggest things is how N is treated by Ghetsis. I know from experience that children with autism are prone to child abuse as a result of being “weird”. Many of the things Ghetsis says about N are akin to what an ableist “parent” might say about their child. Many people with autism are considered to have no emotions or empathy, thus being considered a “freak without a human heart” (Ghetsis I actually wanted to stab you when you said that. You’re stupid. I hate you. So much.)

-Special interests. N clearly has an interest in Ferris wheels and math, and people with autism are known to have a special interest which is very important to them, and they’ll want to learn everything about it. (In case you’re wondering, Pokémon BW has been an interest of mine for the past few months. I talk about it so much my mom knows N’s entire backstory. I’m not making this up.) 

-Preferring to be around Pokémon than people. Once again, I know from experience that people with autism sometimes prefer being around animals than other humans, since animals don’t judge you for being “weird” or “different” they love you for who you are, not what you are. N also shows a lot of empathy towards Pokémon, and would do almost anything to make them happy. N wants to change the world to be a better place for Pokémon.

-N’s room. So, there’s lots of implications showing that N is mentally a child/younger than he is. Many people with autism are known for acting younger than they actually are. Though this might also be a result of the abuse, since children who were abused might have trouble “growing up” and still act childish for a while. N’s room really shows this. It’s shown that N still plays with the toys, and it’s as if they’re the only things that make N feel truly happy. 

(Uhhhh I’ll add to this later I’m getting tired and I’m afraid I’ll say something wrong or confuse people)

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Not So Bad

Pairings: Avengers!Reader x Daniel Sousa, Steve x Bucky (mentioned briefly) 

Summary: What happens when Tony and Natasha don’t die in the final battle with Thanos? Steve’s boyfriend has been returned from the dust and all his friends are alive and well. He has very little to gain from going back in time and everything to lose, so you volunteer to return the stones. Everything was going swimmingly until a Pym Particle malfunction left you stranded in 1949 with little hope of return. You seek out Howard Stark, hoping he’ll be able to come up with a solution to get you back. However, the longer you remain stranded, the more you start to realize maybe the past isn’t so bad after all.

Word Count: 2.6K

Warnings: mild swearing, slight fear of needles/experimentation. 

A/N: Rewatching Agent Carter and the new season of Agents of SHIELD have me on a high Sousa high but I’ve noticed there aren’t many Sousa x Reader fics on this site so I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands. Let me know if I should write a part 2! 

Sequel

___

“Shit,” you gasped, frantically hitting the device on your wrist. “Shit shit shit shit.” 

You were standing in a supply closet though you were supposed to be standing in Tony’s yard, surrounded by the rest of the Avengers team as you celebrate the defeat of Thanos and saving the world one more time. The party was also doubling as Steve’s retirement party; he was finally passing the shield and title of Captain America to Sam and settling down with Bucky. Your travels to return the Infinity Stones had left you famished and you were craving a slice of celebratory cake but there you were, stuck in a 1940s supply closet. 

“Damn you, Scott Lang,” you cursed under your breath once you realized the device wouldn’t be sending you back to the present (or is it technically the future?) anytime soon. 

You let your back slide down the wall, resting on the floor as you wracked your brain for a solution. Lord knows you weren’t qualified to tinker with the device, all this time travel stuff hurt your head when you thought about it too much. The only people who knew what they were doing were Scott and Tony and they were still in the present, probably slicing into that delicious cake right now…

Your stomach rumbled and you groaned. “Damn you, Stark.” 

Then it hit you. 

“Oh my gosh! Stark!” You shouted your epiphany before remembering where you were and slapping a hand over your own mouth, only removing it once you were sure no one had heard you. 

At least you had your solution. Find Howard Stark, fix the device, return to the present (future?), eat some food. 

Your stomach rumbled again. Maybe food should be higher on your to-do list. 

___

You were kinda surprised when you didn’t cry upon learning that Howard Stark’s jet had just left for Los Angeles. You were stranded in Camp Lehigh, 74 years into the past, and your one shot at getting back just flew across the country. 

Alright, new objective: find Peggy Carter, surely she could get you to LA. Of course, you’d have to find a way to convince her to help you without destroying the timeline. You’ll also have to figure out how to get Howard’s help without telling him you’re a time-traveler and without giving him the ability to recreate the device. Holy shit you were never going to get home. 

You were so caught up in your own mind that you weren’t paying attention to where you were going until you were abruptly knocked over. 

“Oh my gosh, are you alright?” A concerned voice rang out above you and you looked up to see a hand reaching out to help you up. A hand that was attached to an extremely attractive dark-haired man. 

You took the hand, allowing the man to help you off the floor as you apologized, “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying any attention!”

“That’s alright, I wasn’t either.” He said, head tilted down in embarrassment. 

The pair of you lingered awkwardly, neither showing any intention of carrying on your separate ways. Finally, the man broke the silence.

“Um, can I help you at all?” He asked, cheeks flushing slightly as he met your eyes for the first time. 

“Uh, yeah, actually.” You responded, your voice suddenly becoming inexplicably quiet. “I’m looking for Howard Stark?”

No, you idiot! You cursed yourself, you know where Howard is! You’re looking for Peggy Carter.

“You just missed him.” The man gave you a sad chuckle. “His plane just took off for LA.” 

“Shit.” You cursed, trying to channel your frustrations into accurately faking a reaction to bad news you had already received. It wasn’t until you saw the look on the man’s face that you remembered where, or rather when, you were. “Aw hell, don’t tell me you’re one of those guys who thinks it’s inappropriate for women to curse?” 

Wow, y/n you’re really nailing it with the first impressions here.

“N-not at all,” The man’s eyes were blown wide as he stumbled to explain himself. “I’d be damned if I thought women weren’t fit to do anything a man could. You just don’t hear many women cursing around here, is all.”

You peered at him curiously, head tilted slightly as you did so. He wasn’t at all what you had expected from the time period. 

“Any chance you could direct me to Agent Carter’s office?” You finally spoke, changing the subject, needing to get back on mission. “If Stark forgot my meeting then I’ll have to find a way to LA, I figure Agent Carter’s my best bet.” 

You knew making up an appointment with Stark was going to bite you in the ass later when he didn’t know who you were but you decided you’d cross that bridge when you came to it. Right now, you needed to get to Stark as quickly as possible and this seemed like the best way to do it. 

“Oh, I was actually headed there myself. I’ll walk you.” The man offered and you smiled gratefully, following him down the hallway, past your supply closet before finally reaching a door that said “Director Peggy Carter.”

“After you,” the man said kindly, holding the door open for you and you stepped into the office. 

You’d seen pictures of Peggy Carter. Of course you had, nobody made it through the World War II section of their history class without seeing at least one picture of Peggy Carter, and well, you worked with Steve so you’d seen plenty of other pictures as well. But Carter was much more stunning in person and no picture could capture the way she held a room. 

“Daniel, it’s good to see you,” You assumed she was greeting the man now stood beside you as you never got his name. “Who’s this?” 

“Oh, uh…” Daniel trailed off, seeming to only just realize he hadn’t gotten your name either. 

“Y/N Y/L/N,” you answered, saving the man from fumbling any longer. 

“Are you new to base, Agent Y/L/N?” Carter asked, looking at you as if she was trying to remember you but was coming up blank. 

“Oh, I’m not an agent,” you corrected before you could stop yourself. You were on a secure SHIELD base and you just told the director that you weren’t an agent, it sounded suspicious even to you. 

“Then what are you doing on my base?” She asked, tone direct but not harsh. 

“I was supposed to be meeting Mr. Stark for an, uh, appointment?” Your hesitation to commit to your flimsy cover was clearly interpreted as something else as Carter’s gaze became stern. 

“An ‘appointment’?” Her lips pursed as she repeated your excuse and you winced. “Well Miss Y/L/N, Howard Stark is no longer here, in fact, he’s no longer in this state and I have no intention of letting one of his women running around my base.” 

Oh my god. 

You couldn’t help the flush that erupted under your skin at the implication. 

“Oh, no, ma’am.” You began to correct her before you could become any more embarrassed. “It’s a strictly professional appointment. He wanted to, uh, run some tests?” 

This time your embarrassment saved your poor excuse of a cover story. You really needed to actually come up with something rather than making it up as you went, you were going to get caught. 

“Tests for what?” You could tell this was her own curiosities shining through, as everyone in the room knew it was none of their business what Stark was going to “test” you for, but well, you could exactly plead the fifth now. Especially not when Peggy Carter though you were a call girl. 

“It’s uh, it’s a bit personal ma’am,” you said softly, hoping to dissuade her from pressing further but she just raised her eyebrows as if to say “go on.” You glanced at the man on your left, really not wanting to say this in front of more people than necessary. Carter seemed to notice your reluctance and pursed her lips once more,

“Miss Y/L/N, Agent Sousa is the head of our West Coast division and your best chance at getting to Los Angeles. Whatever you have to say, you say to both of us.”

You sighed, wondering if what you were about to do was worth it but you couldn’t think of any other reasonable excuse so you started talking. 

“Well, ma’am, I sorta... levitate.” You practically whispered the last word, as if it was deeply offensive. 

It wasn’t a lie per se, you could levitate but you could do much more than just that. You could fly and you could also turn invisible but you decided to leave all that out, sticking with an ability that could be perceived as an anomaly. Something that would greatly interest a man like Howard Stark. 

“Excuse me?” 

“I’m not quite sure how, ma’am.” You played into the anomaly angle, hoping they’d buy it. “It just happens sometimes and I can’t control it.”

“Daniel, Miss Y/L/N will be joining you on your flight to LA,” Carter informed the man and he readily nodded. It seemed you had a convincing cover after all. You made a mental note to thank Nat for all those espionage classes when you get back home. 

___

“I’m just going to take a blood sample and then you’re free to go,” Howard said and you winced. You weren’t a fan of needles, especially when it came to learning about your abilities; you had gone through enough of that in your life already, but here you were subjecting yourself to the experiments once again. You had to keep reminding yourself that it was for the mission. 

To his credit, Daniel Sousa had not left your side since you met at Camp Lehigh. At first, it had been cumbersome, as you were unable to ask Howard for help with your actual problem. But now you were thankful for his presence, it had become something of a comfort through all your stress and anxieties over your current situation. 

It seemed as though Sousa could sense your discomfort, reaching out a hand as Howard prepped the needle. You took it gladly, squeezing tight enough for the man to groan slightly and catch Howard’s attention. 

You thought you heard him mutter “cute” and you blushed slightly before he stuck you with the needle and all your attention went back to squeezing the life out of Sousa’s hand, clenching your eyes shut in a failed attempt to pretend none of this was real. 

You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding when Howard removed the needle, though it took you a few moments longer to let go of Sousa’s hand, almost having forgotten you were holding it in the first place. You muttered a quiet apology when you saw him massaging his hand but he merely smiled at you as if to say you had nothing to be sorry about. 

“That’s all I need from you today Miss Y/L/N,” Howard spoke cheerfully, pulling off his gloves and jotting something down on a clipboard. “If you don’t mind, though, I’d like to have you come back tomorrow for a few more tests.” 

You shuddered at the idea but nodded anyway but Sousa ran a hand down half his face in what you weren’t sure was tiredness or frustration. 

“Stark, it’s four a.m.,” He sighed as if he was used to Stark’s night-owl tendencies. “Surely you don’t expect her to be back here in a few hours after you already forced her to pull an all-nighter for your tests.”

You couldn’t stop your heart from swelling at the man’s words. It had been a long time since you had felt so seen by another person and though you could take care of yourself, it was nice to have someone stick up for you. 

“Well, what do you know, it is.” Stark mused thoughtfully, “I never can keep track of time when my mind’s on a project.” He trailed off then as he thought. The silence was a bit alarming, Howard had barely stopped talking long enough to breathe since you had arrived. 

“Very well, Miss Y/L/N, take tomorrow- or I suppose, today- off and come back the next day. I should have your blood sample analyzed by then too, which’ll give us something more to go off of.” 

You nodded, equal parts relieved and anxious. You were thankful for a test-free day however that meant it would be another twenty-four hours until you could talk to Stark about fixing his son’s time travel device. But for the time being you let Sousa drive you back to his place where he insisted on making up the sofa bed for you without any help. 

Your heart warmed as you watched the man do everything in his power to make sure you were comfortable. You had known each other for less than a day but already he had opened up his home to you. You couldn’t help the flutter in your stomach as you watched him limp around the house gathering bedding and anything else you might need while repeatedly shooting down your offers to help out. It felt nice to be taken care of for once. 

“I’ll talk to Rose tomorrow about getting you some other clothes,” you didn’t know who Rose was but you knew Daniel Sousa, head of the West Coast division of SHIELD, didn’t need to be concerning himself with getting some rando new clothes and yet there he was, already making plans to do just that. “But for now, I hope these work.” He looked away shyly as he offered some of his own clothing up to you. 

You muttered a shy “thank you” of your own as you accepted the T-shirt and pair of sweatpants.  

“Bathroom’s right down the hall, towels are in the closet if you want to shower.” He said, rubbing the back of his neck as he nodded in the direction of the bathroom. 

“Thank you, Agent Sousa.” You said sincerely. 

“You’re staying in my house, I think you can call me Daniel.” He corrected with a small smile. 

“Alright then, thank you, Daniel.” 

You padded down the hall to the bathroom, borrowed clothing clutched in your arms. It felt nice to step under the warm water. While it would only be a few seconds for your team, returning the Infinity Stones had taken quite a bit of time and though your mission was far from over, you were grateful for a moment to relax. You left the bathroom feeling, and smelling, like a whole new person. You weren’t sure, but you thought you saw Daniel’s face redden when you reentered the living room in his clothes before he ducked his head, hiding his face from your view. 

“Do you need anything else Miss Y/L/N?” Daniel asked as you gingerly sat on the edge of the sofa bed. 

“I’m staying in your house, I think you can call me Y/N.” You grinned as you parroted back his words from earlier and he laughed warmly. 

“Well, try and get as much sleep as you can, Y/N, and we’ll worry about everything else once we’re rested.” He smiled reassuringly, as though sensing how lost you felt though not knowing just how lost you truly were. “I’ll be at the end of the hall if you need anything.” 

You nodded with an appreciative smile before exchanging quiet goodnights. You watched Daniel make his way down the hall to his bedroom and close the door before you laid down yourself. The sofa bed was surprisingly comfortable and you suddenly realized how truly exhausted you were. As you laid in the dark on a stranger’s bed in a stranger’s home in a strange time you thought back through the events of the last twenty-four hours and your stomach erupted into butterflies again when your thoughts landed on a certain handsome, dark-haired agent. 

The last thought you had before drifting off to sleep was ‘maybe the past isn’t so bad.’

[dastardlydandelion]

Where did the idea come from for primis tenebris flos? Did you imagine it would be such a hit?

uh, well, you! 😊 i mean, ur the reason it’s a series, anyway. more or less. but posting the first fic? mmm...shit, okay, so. i was running into a rut with some of my original stuff and i don’t think i consciously made the decision to take a break from gorror but it kinda happened anyway and around that time, i just so happened to watch some edit on youtube and that’s when i saw billy for the first time, like rly. like, i already kinda vaguely knew of him bc st is v popular, yk, and his lifeguard whistle is an add-on in dbd. but like, *this* was the first time i rly saw him, this mep edit with that clip of him screaming defiantly whilst being skewered at the fucking meat spider with all retro lightning and funky black blood, so i was like, ‘ooh cool, what’s this?’

(not to mention it reminded me of the p iconic “you can’t kill me!” scene in vikings) 

and then that set me off on this journey where i was looking at more st clips and reading on the st wiki and reading some recap/review stuff on misc internet spaces and like, ofc during that journey i saw susan and i was like ‘ooh, u pretty,’ and...and yk, the gears are kinda going now. and troubled familial dynamics are v interesting to me, not to mention smth i already had experience writing and then it’s like, okay, how do i get them in the same room?? 

running with the idea billy survives seemed like a p good bet. plus an interesting place to enter from susan’s pov since she’s gotta reconcile her perception of her stepson with his doing the last thing she’d ever expect him to do. and billy’s not in a position to escape interacting with susan even if that’s what he’d prefer. 

i’m aware this is a crack possibility itself, given that billy’s dead af, onscreen last breath n everything, not to mention the implication he was necrotic even before being impaled?? like, evidently this guy guzzled fucking bleach and fertilizer and some of his flesh looks...vaguely necrotic? i read different stuff abt this but tbh i wasn’t comfortable incorporating that part in any way bc by the time my own stepsiser died she’d had a significant amnt of necrosis and thinkin abt it hurts.

but crack possibility or not, whatev. the crack is strong in me. gonna hit my literary crack pipe as many times as i want. uh shit, am i even answering the question anymore? the first part, i did, okay, yes.

to recap: saw an edit ----> went on an st info adventure ----> got drawn to possible troubled dynamics ----> saw a good entry point to explore. 

i am so sorry i rambled all the way to such a simple point, smdh. forgive me. 

second part of the question. did i expect it to be a hit? 

heck no! susan barely exists in st, she’s in two scenes. i didn’t think anyone would want to read anything from her pov. plus i underestimated billy’s popularity. like, don’t get me wrong, i knew he was p popular but i didn’t realize *how* popular. and then, as far as my knowledge, gen fics tend to generate less traffic than ship fics, not to mention genre, like...it’s quiet? it’s mostly dialogue. not very much action.

so i was surprised when it got a bunch of hits! actually i almost got intimidated. felt sorta put on the spot and awkward knowing how many eyeballs were on it. but it was worth working past that. <3 <3 <3

tyvm for the ask! hopei didn’t ramble too much. 

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 22

oooh man, its time to feel some EMOTIONS!

I'm BACK after a hiatus, which was due in part to me getting my 1st dose of the covid vaccine! woohoo!

anyways, starting here w/issue 22....we have a great cover w/thunderclash, the legend himself

oof. the covers made me forget how much I don't like the art this issue...I hate to be mean to the artists but this art style just isn't doin it for me chief

god I love this issue though. the framing device of rewind’s movie is so so fantastic

tailgate listing off all his fake awards/accomplishments....ily 

rodimus my boy, you're a prime in my heart

the ‘not a decepticon’ label for cyclonus is so much hvbhkjfbskjf

I literally wanna comment on every single panel bc I love all the characters so much but then id be here forever...that being said whirl ily sm 

hvbjdfbhsfjhdfshja BRAINSTORM ‘according to perceptor - ships genius’ hvhdkjhbfhjs ily dumb gay idiot

and then the cut to perceptor after brainstorm like, blew up his lab vjbkdsfnbksjf dude

GODDDDDD drift ‘your name...defines you. it’s your soul expressed in syllables. hm? oh, yes, sorry. it’s drift.’ GOD he’s so fucking funny. I love early story hippy drift

god I cant stop thinking about how good this whole issue would be as an animated show...like, specifically rewinds film, it would be SO FUCKING GOOOOOOD mtmte show WHEN

rewiiiiind ;_; I fuckgin love rewind god. fellow video editing enthusiast....

ohhhh rodimus being embarrassed about his big speech at the beginning of mtmte....my boy I love u so much

gjhnbgehjsrkfbjksf magnus being suspicious of rewind oh my god. magnus ily but please, look at the lil guy, he’s a good boy, most of the time

the fuckgin footage that magnus removed hbvhakjbfhskf god. wasn't that intended to be footage of magnus dancing? I love him

minibot squad.....

and here it begins, the mystery stick rung question...

poor rung oh my god he’s just trying to polish his lil spaceship and people r throwing shit at him. taking Ls as per usual it seems

hand grenade tag hvbfjksdnfbkjdf love that callback

noooo rungs ship :( 

magnus’s censorship vhbhadkjfhdbhjsakjhfn

oh man I forgot about how they met that race of Transformers But More 

the one-upsmanship hbvkajsbehfjks

whirrrrrl lmao I love whirl sm

goddddd whirl just killing that other alien and ending the 16 million yr long civil war bvkjsdbfhjjkafs so fucking much

oh god oh god the ‘are you happy’ page, I'm not emotionally equipped to handle this like, ever

but I will say I feel like it would be EVEN MORE oof if it were milne or someone drawing it bc I feel like this art style takes away from some of the impact bc the expressions aren't really that...expressive? idk how to put it

anyways. every single answer destroys me!!! like even the happy ones, like chromedome and rewind and tailgate - well, in present time, none of those three are doing so hot, so that makes this just hurt 

and rung....that is so fucking depressing. jesus. this guy is so fuckng sad, somebody get him a friend stat

and swerve...ouch. this readthru I've really noticed how much early-mtmte swerve is not-so-subtly like, crying out for help bc he’s so alone and shit. jesus 

also brainstorms response is just plain ole sad w/context, but at this point in the story without context, it just seems very foreboding lmao. I'm realizing this readthru that brainstorm is very sketchy and ominous in a particular ‘is he evil?’ mad scientist sorta way in early mtmte

and then everyone else is also just so OOF in their own unique sad ways, but I think the worst out of everyone is drift....GODDDDDD. especially considering that at this point in the story, drift is this kinda goofy hippy guy, so seeing him just sit there with his face in his hand, not even answering the question...AND knowing that shortly after this he’ll end up banished...IT FUCKING HURTS M8!

meanwhile, the more upbeat ‘quest to see rungs alt mode’ continues...with an ‘alt mode party’ vhbadkjsdfnabskjf it looks so silly with a bunch of cars just sitting around a table lmao

I cant even tell who everyone is bc they so rarely turn into cars n shit lmaoooooo 

rodimus with the bucket on his head hbvhakjbfskjf I CANT

everyone’s reactions to thunderclash...i fucking love it

the fact that TAILGATE doesn't hate him, even though we’ve seen that tailgate tends to dislike people who are universally liked/who have achieved a lot of impressive things

rodimus you petty thot vbdkjbfdjhsakjdf ily

RODIMUS IS SO FUNNYYYYYY ‘I'm not making all these sacrifices and leading these guys into battle and being inspirational - I'm not doing that because it makes me look good’ RODIMUS VBHSKJDFNBKSJF

thunderclash talking about magnus’s article on typefaces....hdbksjfsdbkjgfb bro

AND THEN MAGNUS HUGS HIM....HGBSKJFDSHFKD I CANT

POOR DRIFT bvhajkdfbhjkjsfd rodimus saying he ‘rehabilitated him’ oh my god

the whole spectralism thing...im sorry I cant get over how funny all this is vbakdjfbksjf thunderclash rlly b out here charming rodimus’s entire crew

and then ratchet comes in, calling tc ‘thunders,’ and tc immediately notices ratchets new hands (somehow) hvbkjfhbskjf truly amazing

it cracks me up that rodimus is all 😒😒 at thunderclash, even though as we come to find out, tc really IS That Perfect, and him complimenting rodimus isn't sarcasm at all lmao

AND THEYRE LOOKING FOR THE KNIGHTS OF CYBERTRON TOO HVSDHFJBSHKHDFJS OF COURSE

the vis vitalis being a life support machine spaceship is a really cool concept tho

‘rescuing some orphans from an exploding sun’ I fucking cant

evil guy: [holds a gun to thunderclash’s head] 

rodimus: :D finally something doesn't go his way!

he’s so petty I’m..........dkdjhfdabhduifadijgl

and its the aliens from earlier! oooh

GODDD I forgot that swerve used rung in mystery stick mode to SCHWACK the guy

rung casually dropping the fact that the functionists like, experimented on him...there's a lot of implications there, and that'll certainly be explored more later...

the fact that his ID card says ‘rong’ hvbhjakhdsbfakhsjfn 

oughufadkfujbsfk the circle of light throwing wrenches n shit at skids...guys cmon vbhsdjkfnslfd

the circle of light is like ‘wtf you all have trauma and a bunch of weird unhealthy coping mechanisms this is wack byeeeee’ lmao

skids calling the lost light his home is rlly sweet tho

cant believe the religious space hippy cult is being so rude about a film made by a guy who died like a week ago. unreal 

cd finally figured out how to make the pffft sound, good for him

AUGHHHHH the fact that rewind used ‘little victories’ as the title of the film and that's something that chromedome said in the video ;_; I'm fucking inconsolable 

rodimus, despite his obvious posturing for the camera during the whole issue, comes off as surprisingly genuine when he says that he hasn't thought about his own future much, but wants the crew to have a happy ending....im gonna cry

‘who knows what's around the corner?’ tailgate, PLEASE don't say that, oh my god, 

OUGHHHH GROUP SHOT 

OHHH mannnnNNNNN i love this issue SO MUCH. what a good fun emotional rollercoaster wrap-up to mtmte s1. god. 

like, this issue has it all - humor, drama, crippling sadness, intrigue, worldbuilding...it’s so excellent 

and getting to see rewind again hurts so bad but also I love him

ok quick mtmte s1 retrospective...god s1 is so fucking good. I'm gonna have to read more to say which chunk of mtmte I liked best but s1 is so fucking excellent that it might be my favorite. though its hard to pick bc there's so much good stuff later on too...whatever, the point is s1 is so so good

the plotlines and characters are fucking stellar. like I cant even believe how well Everything works, its very impressive. I cant really think of anything major that made me go ‘yeah could've done without that plotline/character’

I love how dedicated jro is to connecting everything. I've mentioned it before but basically every single moment in the series has payoff - what you initially think is just a funny moment, or a fluffy character establishment bit, ends up ALSO being an important plot point later, in some way

an example would be here w/rung and his alt mode - it just seems like a fun little B-plot for this issue, and seems to pretty neatly conclude with the reveal that rung was eventually classified as an ‘ornament’ (lmao)...but we later on get to see a lot more about this, both here and in the functionist universe 

and like, stuff like tailgate’s autobot lessons w/magnus - at first that can be seen as purely character establishment stuff, showing that magnus is a strict rule-lover and tg is a loveable try-hard good boy - but that becomes plot relevant in remain in light, with tailgate saving the day due to his knowledge of the autobot code (and its also character relevant, with magnus’s arc in remain in light). 

and I know this is like. a normal regular thing in writing, but I'm just very impressed about how cleanly jro pulls it off, and how many things he’s juggling at once, especially in early mtmte - it’s very ambitious!

and we gotta remember, this is a comic book. I've read a lot of comic books, and the quality is all over the place. a lot of writers bite off more than they can chew, and the story ends up kinda scattered as a result. 

another thing I see a lot in franchise writing like this is a lack of strong early character establishing due to the author assuming the readers are at least somewhat familiar with the characters already - which can be totally fair depending on where it is in the continuity, but other times it can come off as lazy

in mtmte, the cast is extremely well fleshed out, and not only that, the cast itself is unique in that there are a lot of relative unknowns (franchise-wise) - which I think was an absolutely brilliant move, because then jro was able to essentially create The Definitive Version of these characters - characters like swerve, brainstorm, chromedome, rewind, tailgate...mtmte is their baseline characterization, because they haven't really appeared in much else

this also allows for deviation from the franchise norms - again, a comic book classic is good writing being stifled by a need to stick to a certain status quo regard the characters, the world, the powers, relationships, etc

(I've mostly read DC comics, and some marvel, so I'm thinking superheroes w/all these comic comparisons)

so mtmte had a good recipe for genuine creativity in that the characters were relative unknowns, the plot was basically ‘space road trip,’ the status quo of ‘autobot vs decepticon war’ had been demolished throughout the entire franchise...so jro was able to take all that and run, and it turned out so fantastic

and luckily it isn't over yet! so many comics suffer from premature cancellation...and sadly mtmte/ll isn't exempt from this, as we’ll see later, but I've seen some awful ones, where comics are forced to wrap up in like 2 issues while in the middle of an arc. yikes. 

but another comic staple...one of my least favorite things about comics books in general...something that was basically responsible for driving me away from comics after reading a bunch...the dreaded crossover event

yep, even mtmte isn't immune to this unfortunate plague on the comic industry. crossover events are the absolute worst, and I'm saying this as somebody who adores crossovers (in concept more than execution usually). they SHOULD be my favorite, but unfortunately they p much always completely suck

they're essentially a ploy to get you to read the other ongoing titles, but they usually only serve to bog down whatever story you're reading to the point where you don't even wanna read that one anymore, let alone read all the other ongoings. at least, that’s been my experience 

it doesn't help that reading orders tend to be hard to find/keep track of, and that you need to go read the other series to know what's going on. I just hate it, like, I came here to read THIS series, I don't want a bunch of other series showing up too - even if I was reading two series, I wouldn't want them crossed over, because they're separate stories! augh!

I'm totally losing my focus here but my point is...crossover events suck, and mtmte unfortunately is involved in one. I have not read dark cybertron, and I'm not about to. I've heard nothing but bad things so I have no desire to inflict that upon myself 

soooo ill be reading through the tfwiki articles for those issues to give myself a better understanding of what went on - which is more than I've ever done in the past - and maybe ill even make a single post summarizing my thoughts on what I read in the wiki, lmao

but yea ill be skipping to the mtmte s2 stuff next 

phew ok I'm super tired, my vision keeps blurring out and stuff lmao. its time for bed, I probably have more thoughts but ill save them for later. for now...peace out!

[writingandmore]

hello!! if it isn't too much to ask could i get a matchup for homestuck, preferably matesprit + kismesis? i'm a prospit sylph of life n an aries isfp 9w1;;, getting the peanut gallery out of the way i'm a very silly person and am pretty much being ironic 24/7, i'm responsible and described as the "mom" and "therapist" friend because i like helping people any time i can. i deal with anxiety problems which can unfortunately come into play frequently and am awkward af with social interaction (1/??)

(2/???)but once i get close to someone i can do pretty much whatever and jokingly insult my friends a lot. i would say i'm a logical person but sometimes i can be a bit naive. I have a big interest in video games, some mangas, painting, and occasionally dabble in writing (generic much eh?). i REALLY like horror/found footage/morbid history etc ec and none of it really scares me that much. i also like witchcraft and have a crystal collection + tarot cards! (next one last i promise omg sorry)

(3/3) the type of person i usually hit it off with is someone i immediately can sorta vibe with and throw jokes back-and-forth without breaking the flow yknow? i've noticed my type is pretty much funny asf, talkative, but not very emotional at first glance ;; also random fact but i use emoticons all the time and fear of tumblr eating this ask has prevented that anyways sorry for these being so long thank you for taking this request if you do have an amazing day !!!!

I pair you with John (matesprit) and Rose (Kismesis)! 

 - John is also a person who loves to joke around, so your own silly personality would match really well with his! He’s also someone who tries his best to be there for others, and even if he doesn’t necessarily do the best job, he still tries his best to help out, so maybe you could help him become a bit better at doing so! 

 - He’s a pretty friendly guy overall, so he wouldn’t really mind you being a bit awkward when first meeting-he can be that way too a lot of the time. Once you both got comfortable, he’d really enjoy being able to joke around with you! Just remember that he can be a little sensitive so don’t say any jokes that could be too harmful. 

 - John can be a bit naïve too, along with being a bit too trusting, so hopefully you two can try and watch out for each other to make sure you aren’t being taken advantage of by anyone. 

 - He loves to play video games, especially if they’re multiplayer! Playing games together would be really common place, and while he’s not bad at them, he isn’t really super good either, so hopefully your skills can help you guys progress a bit easier together. 

 - Rose can get into some morbid stuff, but because she knows the typical psychological implications that comes with consuming too much of that kind of media, so if she talks to you about that, it might be hurtful and annoying, but that may get you to lay off that genre for a bit and find other interests as well! 

 - She has her feelings about wizardy and the genre, and it is not necessarily positive ones, so there would be a lot of conflict on that which could lead to some heated moments. 

 - She’s definitely great at throwing jokes and remarks back and forth too, so if either of you are ever frustrated and need an outlet, using each other would work out well since you can both jump off of each other so well. 

 - She certainly fits your description of not being too emotional at first glance, so it seems she at least semi fits your type of wanted partner too. She may not be too talkative, but she can be pretty funny if you like sarcasm.