#Student's Pain: Collector's Edition

[tranceinnumerabletabs]

When Johnny Comes Back

A/N: I read this and was inspired to write. I hope anyone who sees this enjoys it. Tell me if you'd like a part two.

Roommate!Johnny that made It feel inevitable.

He was just so…so….him! His bastard attitude, his fuckass Mohawk he made you like tolerate, his motherfucking Shrek accent. No, you won’t stop calling it that. It’s stupid and silly which is why you smile or look down when he talks to you, no other reason. 

You’ve just…grown so fond of Johnny! ugh! How could he! The fondness grows in your heart like a cancerous growth with the only respite coming in the form of Johnny…..of.. Soap going on deployment for long periods of time, making you feel like a young doe-eyed maiden in the 1940s wistfully awaiting the return of her man from the war. The feeling only exacerbated every time you check to see if Sergeant John “Soap” Mactavish has send back a letter. 

Yes, a letter

Security restrictions, he says. As if that makes the feeling of being hooked on him easier to mask as you sit down and physically write to him that you’re……checking on him. 

(Why don’t you perfume the letter and kiss it while you’re at it Simp) 

But you know these feelings will go back to being strong when Johnny comes back. As soon as you hear the “honey I’m home!” And get crushed in the arms of a clingy Johnny you’ll be happy to see him.

You decide to be generous and send him a care package, as a thank you to all the times he’s ordered you breakfast and took care of you when you were sick, better now than when Johnny comes back, you suppose. You remember all he does when he’s here. Especially when you were sick he insisted on spoon feeding you like a baby. He ruffled your hair so gently as he coos that you’re the most adorable chipmunk, all puffy faced and squeaky. You remembered how you huffed, too weak to properly go off or even refute his incessant desire to hand feed you. He smiled and chuckled at your frowny and pouty tired face. He rubbed your back and beamed when you were well enough and no longer irritated at him enough to thank him for taking care of you. You remember that adorable look in his face. And you want to see it again when Johnny comes back, that roguish smile with slightly crooked teeth scrunching up a nose that clearly looked like it was broken one too many times, those shiny blue eyes that gripped you like vice, thos-

BZZ! 

Some notification from your phone brings you back to reality, what were you doing again? Oh yeah, making a care package. You check your phone, nothing important. 

You look at what you’ve added so far.

You first packed a bottle of scotch, technically against the rules but you put it inside a flask and shampoo bottles. You know he’ll figure it out…probably. 

Then you packed some candy he likes, instant coffee (better than what he gets), the letter you wrote him, it felt too romantic and like you really were a yearning maiden staring at the window awaiting your man so you made sure you called him a bastard at least 6 times, a dog 4, and a cunt 2 and Shrek once

And yet, as you try and place the letter you still feel shy, as if it’s still too personal. It still has the fondness you feel for him as you wrote how worried you are and that “you better not do anything stupid Johnny! Don’t die or I’ll make sure to sell your ashes to the British museum as Ancient Highlander Remains” you became more embarrassed about your feelings without him here to convince you of it’s normalcy by being overbearing. you hide it under some items as if that won’t allow him to find it anyway. You place some hygiene products, hand sanitizer, another scotch just in case, an adorable picture of your grumpy black cat with a RBF that Johnny named Simon for some reason. Should you add another scotch? Nah you could share this one when Johnny comes back. 

You chuckle to yourself, okay now you’re spoiling him. When Johnny comes back he’ll be all smug and egotistical, boasting loudly about how much you missed him and how he’ll definitely use this as a way to embarrass you in front of your friends again.

You try to calm your heart in these times. You try to quell the craving of a soft body on movie nights, but a pillow near his residual scent on the couch doesn’t ruffle your hair like you’re a pet like he does. You try not to yearn a bastardly attitude when you want to complain about something, but there’s no one there to be a bigger problem than the one you were upset about. 

You sigh, at least you could sleep in your bed after a movie instead of upright on a pyromaniac Scottish lad. 

He never gives concrete dates on his return. It’s always a vague timeframe like “a few months” or “when it’s done”  

It’s…part of the reason you think you’d never end up with him. You thought about his absence, his risky lifestyle, his fuckboy attitude. 

You sigh…at least you’ll have more to catch up on when Johnny comes back. 

Part 2

[p5x-theories]

Manaka’s Confidant

(last updated 6/8/25!)

This post documents the fully filled-in information on Manaka Nagao gained through progressing her Confidant! It contains things that could be considered spoilers for her Confidant, as part of the information is a summary of its story.

Manaka is available in the afternoon most days, when it isn’t rainy. Her Confidant is tied to the Kindness social stat, and level 17 Kindness is required to fully complete it.

Note that Manaka’s Confidant takes place after Chizuko’s side story, though I believe the game will let you start it before completing Chizuko's side story.

Favorite Presents

(An asterisk (*) marks the special presents added with (and unlocked through) Miyu Sahara’s Confidant, which are liked by all Confidants currently in the game.)

Idol Keychain An idol keychain made of acrylic material.

Gossip News Weekly A magazine that reports on various entertainment and celebrity gossip. Its circulation is irregular, but it’s very popular.

Themed Flower Pot Lovely shaped flowerpot. Designed with an emphasis on practicality and style.

Uji Matcha Pudding Uji matcha pudding set with red bean paste and glutinous rice balls.

Mini Speaker A compact desktop speaker. It’s easy to carry, supports multiple connections, and has specially installed custom color lights.

Limited-Edition Keychain* This keychain has a unique shape, and is well-made, but there weren’t many of it produced. It has a certain collector’s value.

Bulk Snacks Value Pack* A combo pack containing a variety of traditional snacks that will remind people of the taste of childhood.

Advanced Essential Oil Combination* A value-for-money set of essential oils, with multiple functions to help you relax your mind and body.

Chestnut Cake* Fragrant chestnut cake with mild sweetness to suit most people’s tastes.

Musical Snow Globe* A snow globe that plays music, and can be shaken gently to make snow fall inside.

Desktop Incense Machine* A household incense machine that is small in size, so it can be placed anywhere.

Classical Music Record Collection It contains dozens of well-known classical compositions, and is a valuable collector’s vinyl record set.

Mini Cotton Candy Machine This small cotton candy machine for home use is light and compact, with a complete set of functions so you can enjoy this homemade delicacy anytime and anywhere.

Soft Blanket This soft blanket is made from skin-friendly material, so it's soft, comfortable, and good at retaining warmth.

Pop Music Collection An assortment of popular pop songs from recent years, perfect for collectors.

Small Electric Keyboard This keyboard is small in size and easy to carry, with a full set of functions.

Personal Information

Birthday: February 2 Blood Type: A Age: High school first-year Profession: High school student Height: 158cm Weight: I'm often told to eat more Favorite Food: Grandma's special cheese stew Interests: Singing and scrolling video sharing sites Features: Honey varieties tongue-twister

Story

Character Details A girl I helped before, who loves singing and has a tragic past... but her eyes are full of unyielding courage, and she hopes to cheer up again.

Personal Data 1 At the jazz club, I enjoyed a mesmerizing music experience with Manaka and Chizuko. Manaka seemed to be in good spirits, and even sang on stage. I learned that she wanted to walk around, but Chizuko's eyesight isn't very good, so I took on the responsibility of pushing her wheelchair for a walk. She also changed into a brand new outfit, which was very beautiful, and she almost seemed like a different person. After the walk, she wanted to find time to walk with me again.

Personal Data 2 In Kichijoji, I met Manaka and Chizuko again. During our walk, Chizuko left early because of her eyes, leaving me to take care of Manaka. Manaka looked a little down, thinking that her physical therapy delayed her grandma's medical treatment. Then, she recalled her painful past, and hoped to work harder, get better quickly, and become a normal person again. At least now I'm here to accompany her forward.

Personal Data 3 This time, I went to the planetarium with Manaka, and her favorite song was playing there. She seemed to have a lot of fun. However, after the show, she blamed herself, thinking that she'd been causing trouble for Chizuko, and that she needed to get better soon. After joining her as she imagined what a normal life would be like, I sent her home.

Personal Data 4 Recently, Manaka's physical therapy seems to be getting more intense, which proves that she's making rapid progress, and we're all very happy. She mentioned that her grandma seemed to want to travel to the places where they filmed a certain program, and Manaka hoped that she could give her this trip as a "gift" through her efforts, as a thank-you for taking care of her. In response to this strong motivation, I accompanied her as she practiced walking in the park for a long time...

Personal Data 5 In order to find a good place to take Chizuko, Manaka and I visited various places in the city, and finally arrived at the aquarium. Although it is indeed fun here, the environment doesn't seem like it would be very friendly to Chizuko's eyes, so it seems we need to find another place. However, Manaka has completely cheered up, and said that she will not give up again, whether it's working harder in life, or singing what she loves most...

Personal Data 6 Manaka brought good news: the doctor said that she could try walking on her own. She wanted to show her grandma, so I called Chizuko to the park. Seeing Manaka walking, Chizuko was very excited, and said with relief that Manaka's efforts lately have finally paid off. Yes, Manaka has made efforts far beyond the ordinary to stand up again...

Personal Data 7 When I saw Manaka again, she could walk almost normally. In order to practice walking in crowded places, I accompanied her to Chinatown for a walk, and she even bought a souvenir for Chizuko. As we talked about gifts to make Chizuko happy, Manaka suddenly realized that there's only one thing she can give, a unique gift- her singing voice.

Personal Data 8 I went to karaoke with Manaka to practice the song she was going to give her grandma. We tried songs of various genres, and finally decided on the theme song of the anime that Manaka loved most as a child. After all, it has a deep meaning to her and her grandma. During this, Manaka and I also re-read the comments of her past videos, and found a lot of heartwarming words. Finally, Manaka told me that everything is different because of me, and bravely expressed her feelings...

Personal Data 9 The day for giving Chizuko her surprise arrived in the blink of an eye. When she stepped into the jazz club and witnessed the performance that Manaka put together for her, she was immediately moved. Seeing these two happy people, I also began to look forward to more opportunities to "co-perform" with them in the future. Afterward, Manaka called me to the park where we first met, and expressed her sincere gratitude again.

Personal Data 10 Manaka kindly invited Chizuko and I to Chinatown again. Watching her lead the way for us and treat us to various delicacies, I felt her vigorous vitality. She said with certainty that even if she might still be frightened by difficulties, she will never lose again, and will rise to everyone's expectations, repay her grandmother, and fulfill the promise between us. I believe she can do it, because she's none other than Manaka Nagao, who has been reborn.

Voice Lines

Japanese VA: MoeMi | Chinese VA: Min Pan

(As I can only add up to ten audio files per post, I’ll only include the Japanese lines below! Feel free to ask for the Chinese ones, though.)

I'm Manaka Nagao. I also go by Ange when I'm singing. Although I've experienced a lot of discouragement, I've decided to pursue my dream again...!

I've always struggled a lot with depression... but now, I want to try to change that. I don't want the people who care about me to have to worry anymore.

When we first met... you saw I was a complete mess. But now, that's a fond memory for me. Grandma and I are both forever grateful we met you.

Maybe because I used to spend so much time on the internet... sometimes I get anxious and scared around others... even though everyone I meet in real life seems nice. But couldn't it be that some of them are attacking each other when we're not looking...?

I heard that when you first met Grandma, she fought off a rude drunkard. She can seem a bit larger-than-life, but she's really kind. She really loves me, and has always taken care of me. It's thanks to her that I'm the person I am today.

My fans are the ones that gave me the stage name "Ange". I'm a little embarrassed that they say I have the "singing voice of an angel", but it also makes me happy, because to me that means that my singing voice can heal the hearts of those that listen.

I won't ever give up again, not on singing nor sharing my voice with others. For the sake of the people that love me, I think I want to keep shining brightly. ... By the way, if it's okay with you, do you want to make plans together? If the two of us formed a band with Grandma, that would be so much fun!

Confidant-Specific Bonuses

Rank 1 The Power to Take a Step: Increases the amount of Charm and Kindness points earned from activities.

Rank 5 The Courage to Move Forward Together: Increases the amount of Guts and Proficiency points earned from activities.

Rank 9 Determination to Spread Happiness: When a social stat reaches rank 16, 18, and 20, gain one Inspiration Glow (used on Wonder's skill tree).

Rank 13 Perseverance in Expanding Insights: Increases the amount of Knowledge points earned from activities.

Rank 17 Being With You Is the Most Important Thing: After a social stat reaches level 20, gain a random gift item for every 200 excess points earned.

[notyouraveragebozo]

Note 7/21/2023

A small business responds to the NASA + AARO (All-Domain Anomaly Resolution Office) UAP Independent Study Team Report of May 31, 202 Take -TWO (This is the Second, more reflective, response after the one posted here on tumblr on June, 2, 2023). From: the desk of Unique Destinations Enterprise –  CEO/COB

To: science.nasa.gov/uap and everyone who would like to understand better, and who read the following message,… (This message comes after a total of 5 full-listens, of the 4-hour long NASA YouTube presentation.)

We had a small following on the corporate tumblr account, but after posting the first – long – response to the UAP Meeting,… We found corporate tumblr account followers dropped-off. We apologize if anyone took offense. We (did/do) NOT intend denigrate those seeking to ‘grow in understanding’. We posted the Red Curtain Tour video to Our Home page (4/16/2023), – 836 days after  – We first went LIVE to the World – and 3 days before  – AARO spoke to Congress (4/19/2023). (We had hopes that this new material would have been  ‘mentioned’.  Harassment of truth seekers – was/is – not – Our aim. We have taken pains to try to be as transparent, and forthright as possible.)

Being a VERY small company, it is a daily challenge to distance and/or ‘filter’ business matters promos/plans/ and intentions, from – public ‘expression’ – of ‘personal views’ on things. (And proof-reading and editing – are big challenges – as well.)

Let me begin by saying to – all – that I have great respect for those who seek after knowledge. Those who advance Science, and those who serve in Academia, informing and inspiring future generations… I whole-heartedly endorse.

(The following is a short and incomplete bio.) I grew up with NASA and the Space Age. The oldest of four boys (with five years span between – first and fourth.) I was privileged to travel for three weeks each summer as a kid, (up until my senior year), due to my father’s Hospital Administration work. We traveled/camped in many State and National parks each summer, and traveled through many states, (about 23), and I visited many museums, libraries, and monuments. – I had a very enriched experience as a youth.) The asthma would make camping hard, at nights, but the things I saw and experienced,…I was very pleased and grateful, to experience – all of the things and places my parents enabled me to witness and take-‘in’

In elementary school, I had as a classmate – the niece of one the Apollo One crewmembers. I was the space cadet/class-clown and she was like – a movie star to me. (She was so pretty!) I was a slow-blooming student, with ADDHD, asthma, (and was socially awkward with peers - having so many brothers - to occupy my life.) I tended to be more comfortable with rocks than with people.

My asthma kept me ‘immobile’ a lot,… I grew up in front of the TV. Nature shows like: ‘Marlin Perkins and Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom’; ‘The Undersea World of Jacques Cousteau’;   ‘The Wonderful World of Disney’; and many hours of Science Fiction TV shows, like: ‘Time Tunnel’; ‘Johnny Quest’; ‘My Favorite Martian’; ‘20,000 Leagues under the Sea’; ‘Twilight Zone’, ‘Lost in Space’; ‘It’s About Time’; ‘Star Trek’ – and many others. I brought the role-playing game Dungeons and Dragons to my High School when I was a Junior. (My family was a family of ‘nerds’.) My brothers, coming-up, after me, learned from my mistakes – and each made Phi Beta Kappa in college.

I started my collegiate education by failing-out – after 1 1/2 years,… – but – after that VERY expensive ‘learning’ experience,…  I returned to school – and was made valedictorian of the third largest school in my state. (I had joined the Marines after ‘failing-out’ – in order to grow in discipline.) (I currently stand at having connections to 14 post-secondary institutions.)

I am also a life-long rock-hunter/fossil-collector/and artifact-seeker. It has long been my nature to look for ‘patterns’ and rationale, for ‘Why?’, ‘What?’, ‘Where?’,  and ‘How?  – and thinking about ‘What to do?’ – with what is noticed by my eye. The asthma, kept me ‘still’ and able to focus on my surroundings, and the ADDHD kept me ‘searching’.

When I rock-hunt – I search – with ‘intention’  – (as well ‘joy’ and ‘hope’, in serendipitously discovering things ‘special’ enough to go into my bucket.) I try to gauge the environment, I look for clues that might inform my searching. My eyes scan, and my brain ‘decodes’ the – ‘favorability quotient,…  – continuously ‘assessing’ – each rock’s ‘potentiality’ – against – the ‘leaverite’.

I have had to physically ‘weigh the merits’ of having a beautiful 68.4 lbs. boulder of fossil fern impressions at my home – versus – the ‘pressing’ reality of having to shoulder the boulder to the car, in 105 degree heat, a half-a-mile away,… – uphill – (But hey,.. it’s what rock hounds do.) – I’ve had to contemplate logistics, as many times as I have had adventures.

I am trying to say, that in my days, on this beautiful, blue, miraculous, marble,…  I’ve spent many long hours in silent contemplation, utilizing the elements of the Scientific Method:  – making observations; collecting data; and developing hypotheses – (by having my mind open, to take – second – closer looks – to scrutinize – clear my eyes,  look, again, and again, and again,… and, review, ‘it-all’,… and,… I come to revise the ‘angle’ of my ‘understanding’…. until I am either satisfied – that I figured something ‘new‘ – out, or,… if I can go no further at the moment, then I’m stuck at a point, and…   I’m left to question   – wanting more data,… more ‘input. This is how I process, make sense, and deal with my world.

55 months ago, while virtually wandering this World, as one would a beach – but utilizing satellite imagery – in place of eyes upon the ground,… potentially ‘novel‘ information – was first encountered.

This Intellectual property, is at the heart of the small, veteran-owned/operated company, A Urumalli, U Macinasar, G Entum – Unique Destinations Enterprise.

It took two years of patient, solo, silent study, and the deepest of cogitation, (and three website developers) – before finally being able to turn the website, UniqueDestinations.org  –  ‘On’, and…  an Opportunity – ‘the likes of which, the World had never known’,   was – first broadcast – to the citizens of this planetary paradise.

With that being said,… to the meat of the matter’ at hand… as to UAPs  – (Unidentified Anomalous Phenomenon)

Regarding UAPs,… Unique Destinations Enterprise and UniqueDestinations.org CANNOT talk about: ways to improve sensor and detector methods;  safeguarding air travel; mitigating space junk; or discussing the ‘goings-on’ in the sky today, that cannot be explained. However, We find ourselves in a position to contribute to the understanding, of a specific subset of UAP investigational lines of query.

Unique Destinations Enterprise and UniqueDestinations.org can offer insight into that, which is – proposed to be observable – at a certain, specific, geophysical, latitude/longitude location, – (in-situ!)

It is not a trivial side-point, to mention, that what appears - as ‘observable’, – appears to have 'occasioned' – a VERY long time ago! Should this be found evident,… (the possible – ‘vast’ – age),… it is conceivable to think,…  that – coupled – with the sightings of stuff moving around in the sky today,… – this OLD(?) thing – could inform us-all of – some (very interesting information).

I understand – that at the time of this meeting, Dr. Nadia Drake, was speaking, as she knew things to be ‘true’, when she iterated the corollary…  ‘to date in the referred scientific literature, there is no conclusive evidence suggesting an extraterrestrial origin, for UAP’.

Dr. Drake,… you spoke the truth, but just because certain supportive evidence for ‘claims’, are not ‘in-the annals’ or ‘in-hand’ (by the meeting date) – does not mean, that – evidence – does not – ‘exist’ – to be recorded in much clearer imagery in the near future.

During the May 31st, UAP Roadmap to Investigative Research – Framework Development meeting,… several phrases were mentioned repeatedly: ‘a needle-in-a-haystack’; ‘extraordinary claims requiring extraordinary proof’; and ‘without sufficient data, we are unable to reach defendable conclusions’.

In my life, also courtesy of NASA,   I have heard, (voiced in real-time 54 years ago!), the thrilling adage, – “One small step for a man, and one giant leap, for mankind.”

For 55 months now, I have been in a very unusual - and I feel very privileged position,… to be the ‘shepherd’ – of a new possibility – a new ‘opportunity‘ for everyone.

If you seek ‘possible’ leaps in learning,… regarding the nature of this Universe,… and to seek to find solutions to the pressing: Climate issues; Energy issues; and matters of ‘Food, Shelter, and the remedies to the Human ills of the ‘heart’ and of the mind,…besides looking – as far, far away as you can possibly see – to take it – all  – in… UniqueDestinations.org, would have it be understood, that amazing things abound – right here – under our noses! Things wondrous, and miraculous,   just wait to be discovered - and learned about.

To start to learn about any new thing, we all are taught the ‘basics’, and when we are informed,… it is from – a ‘certain point’ – a place of ‘beginning’,… – putting all growing/searching/hungry minds, on the ‘same page’.

The Home page of UniqueDestinations.org – is a great place to begin to learn about possible novel data.

We await the ‘validity test‘ – that We had ‘couched' in a ‘dream opportunity’ – for those who could ‘dream-without-restraint’. We had offered – a unique opportunity to entertain thoughts both –  boggling – and – remarkable. We offered an ‘Adventure‘ -(‘everything that it takes – to cobble together an expedition – actively wrapping one’s mind around the ‘What-ifs’?, and ‘What-nows’? that come about, when contemplating – ‘walking up and rapping on the door.’ (All that would go through such an ‘experiencing’ mind,…  that – experience,…  – will be the – ‘Tale‘ – they will tell – forever!)

We offered – the opportunity to ‘dream’ dreams – in such a way, as to try to – ‘move and inspire, and fill one’s being, and life, with a renewed sense of awe, wonder, respect, and purpose,’… or,… just to have some new – EXPENSIVE – memories made.

We offered the ‘deepest of human dreams’. A supreme adventure – full of ultimate cogitation

After the recent tragedy at sea with those travelers into the cold, dark, unknown,… We are rethinking the logistics required, in a second  auction presentation. Do We repeat, as We had shared before? Or, might there be,… tweaks?         

With 99 pages of unredacted text, 11 more stills, and one more movie,… the Deep-Dive materials help provide for ‘clarity’ in one’s personal opinions.

Just how the Coordinates are moved upon, is still – up for consideration. In the eventual dissemination of my ‘dreamy’ directions – it is my most fervent hope – that this material not be swept under a rug, and hidden-away.

Any collaboration  would be with Science, Academia, Industry , here in America, and Internationally.  – (This is thinking – hypotheticals – out-loud.)

As one of 8,000,000,000 people on this planet, I felt a duty to share, what this ‘citizen’ saw. I felt everyone must have a chance to comprehend, if they so choose. So I was tasked to make things readable in many tongues – to minimize any miscommunication.

If you want to make some headway in Your UNDERSTANDING… You know where to go for the Coordinates of Conundrum – the Directions to a ‘Dream’  – an adventure – of rarest sort. We can point to where you begin your Journey into Tomorrow, – the place to start  – to learn more.

We have a new Facebook profile: ‘Unique Destinations Enterprise’ – (it is still in its early days and rudimentary.) I have been notoriously hard to contact,  We have email: manager@uniquedestinations.org We have tumblr @UniqueDestinationsEnterprise Plurk @UniqueDestinationsEnterprise, YouTube @uniquedestinationsenterpri7973; and @UniqueDestinations.org on��TikTok.

For those who seek to understand how it – all – 'first began' – (whatever that means),… Remember the Bard – ‘There are more things in heaven,… and on Earth, Horatio,… than are dreamt of, in your philosophy.’ (FYI: When I had first experienced higher education, and had failed-out -I was studying Philosophy.) But,… like John Cleese, had eventually exclaimed,… ‘I got better’.

I have grown in my understanding over time. I have had wonderful experiences in my days - as I have had bad ones, – but – knowing what I do – now,… I would not use the ‘Time Tunnel’  to travel back in Time to tell myself – even – five words! I would endure everything – all over again – to be in the position – I find myself in – today.   I am not a comic book, or an AI fabrication. I am flesh and blood human that saw ‘something’ and took the chance. I created an opportunity to grow, and I shared it for free,  with everyone having a cell phone and access to the internet. In the time since going LIVE – 12/31/2020, I sought to improve comprehensibility in 104 languages and spoken English voice! I have added a verbal Back story element after the self-proclaimed ‘free speech absolutist’ SILENCED my CEO Twitter account.

I have added a Red Curtain Tour video, and have a Director’s Den page that reflects on the First auction attempt. Since Halloween of 2022 – I have shared one element of my Post Script messages – intended to be held back for after the GPS Coordinates sale, (but due to the human element of the message, I could not risk staying silent, in case of losing the human opportunity to ‘connect’.

As of this posting, I can offer coffee mugs to consumers – globally – (for reduced shipping and increased speed in problem resolution.)

With coffee mugs available,… the next step before the Coordinates are dealt with,… I am tasked with finding an Art gallery home for my image,  ‘Abstracting Enigma’.

 And then, to the meat of the conversation, as far as UAP go,…

Unique Destinations Enterprise and UniqueDestinations.org can address the extraordinary claim of – a ‘possible, ancient, crashed, flying-saucer’.

Validity and Verification await those bold enough to move forward and explore.

At the time-mark (3:53:44), Dr. David Spergel stated,… ’I think this is an opportunity for Citizen Science’. - I do not know if he was referring to me, specifically, but I know, We DO have the ‘GEEPS’ – (GPS data.)

Thank you for listening to this long post.  No slight is intended, however I am sensitive to those that belittle the pursuit of new information, and those who would amplify ‘fear’ and ‘loathing’, over making new discoveries and advancements.

This is the Second – (more studied) – response, to the NASA + AARO UAP Investigational framework-building, ‘Road Map’ for Studying  Anomalous Phenomenon presentation, of 5/31/2023.

I thank you for having the patience to read this message.

Respectfully, the small business Unique Destinations Enterprise and UniqueDestinations.org, – (The place where dreams and reality, may meet),… and,… –( a ‘needle’ – may be parted, from – a ‘haystack’).

(This letter is posted here for transparency and will also be directly sent to the NASA UAP website.)

[pookacangetit]

Disney Song! Yuu [Disney Songs Edition: A Mouthful of Damnation]

Featuring a case of fraud; a furious prefect who was the victim of said fraud; and a lovesick student who took the word 'admiration' to a whole new level.

MASTERLIST

It was a fine morning when the doors to The Council slammed open.

The Shroud heir was ready to duck and cover under his seat for the intruding student but he outright screeched when the furious Ramshackle prefect stormed in.

It was ethereal but utterly terrifying for an angry Ramshackle prefect to stare you down like you're scummier than dirt. Idia had mixed feelings about it.

"I can tolerate the 'protection'." Yuu started before anyone could speak. "I can tolerate and ignore the fact all of you have so much free time on your hands to start a cult and carry around recordings of my voice like they're the second coming of the Great Seven."

"But this," they hissed the word out like it pained them to do so, "this is too far."

They pulled something out of their pocket and slammed it onto the table.

Sam, whose shadows had fled the room the second Yuu had entered, cautiously lean forward with a frown, "... those are The Council's collector card set we sell."

"Yes, but why is my face on them?" Yuu asked, fingers twitching erractically for something- or someone- to hit.

"Because you're the Great One?" Bob piped up, getting smacked in the face as Beau stepped in.

"These are SSR Cards of you performing your magic as you sing in different costumes; and these are the Common Cards of Grim in various dresses after Azul blackmail- ahem, bribed, the monster to participate." Beau explained gently, as though Yuu would start hitting people any second now.

Judging by the way Yuu was despairingly staring at an empty chair, it was highly likely.

Sam blinked, "At first we were uncomfortable using these pictures as merch since you weren't looking at the camera in some of them. But Crowley said you consented and got half of the shares for the merch since then."

Yuu blinked back, "... you mean the monthly budgets and bank account that bastard crow gave me out of nowhere?" They sounded calm.

Everyone sent a quick prayer for the headmaster.

Crowley had been in a meeting with a student representative from NBC when the door to his office slammed open.

"THE COURTYARD IS ON FIRE!!"

"... WHAT." The headmaster sped towards the window in his office, ignoring his guest as he screeched in pure offense at the sight of his schoolyard on fire.

Smack dab in the middle of the burning lawn and screeching students was a large bonfire, fed by the pictures of Crowley Yuu was throwing in with utter glee while their friends did so with mild hesistation.

Beata Maria, you know I am a righteous man~

Of my virtue I am justly proud ~

È̵̢̨̛̺̙̝͕͚͔̳͚̿̐̀̽̔̅̈́̇̎͜͠͠t̷̛̞̯̾̓̽́͆̉̿̐͂͑̕̕ ̶̻̗̞̱͕̺̣̥̬̩̖̋̎̑̒͋̒͋̈́̃̄̃̚͠ţ̶̛̗͈̫͉͉̦̮̖̰̜̜̘̌̀̄̏́̋͗̔̐̿ͅi̴̭̟̝̩̬̠͚̗̠̔̾͠ͅb̸̙̜̄͒͊̽͐̅͋͊́͒̀͑̃͜͝ͅi̶̢̡͙̮͇͍̻͔͚̤̊̀̉̄͌̄̎̀̈́̕͘͘͘͝t̸̪͑̓̏̎͌̄͌͂̂̈̋̊̓͝ ̶̨̛̠̻̫̲̳̻͇̠̟͉͎̭͈̋̄͂̆̓̆̈́͌̾̑͝P̶̢͍̜̺̟̹̭͎̰̳̮̻̭̤̍͜a̴̧͖͕͍̍̔́̈́̈̔̈́̊͐͑̕͠t̷̨̡̡̫̗̤͕͙̪̦̩͉͓̹͆́̅̇͛̄̓̍̚͜͠͝͠͝͠ḙ̸̺͑̉̓̍͑͌̊̔̄͌̿r̸̺͙̱̃̊̈́͒͒͊͛͒̈̓̊̿͠͝~

"We should put the fire out before it spreads out of the yard." Deuce murmured, eyeing the Leech twin who was standing in the farthest corner and clutching their jacket as though it set on fire again at any moment.

Ace elbowed him "Shut up and burn these pictures."

Epel simply cackled as he threw.

The common, vulgar, weak, licentious crowd~

Q̵̡̨̮͈͖͖͓͙̜̙̩̾̈́͗͐̾̄͗͝Ự̶̳̯͙̎͛̂͒Į̵̧̧̳̳͚̫̩̀͒̈́̐̂̓́͜Á̴̡̡̗̪͕̼͈̥̤̩̫͇͌̔̓̌́͆́̈́̌̈́ ̷̡̼̘̠͓͉͈͔̒͊̊͝P̵̼̬͍̲͈̆E̵̦̮̱̼̥̺͆͗̅̑͘͜͠C̴̱̊̂Ç̸̡͔̣̣̼͍͓̥̩̍͐̀̂̆͒̔̔̍̋͊̑Â̴̧̡̠̒̓́̽̄̕͜V̶̨̤̯̟̭͗̉̈́͗̓I̵̧̬̹̬̪͕͕̥̬̟͓̽̏̽̀̽͆̌͑̊͘͠ ̴̡̼̦̥͚̖͔͇͔̮̜̫̱̩̂̍̊͋͛͑̂͊ͅŅ̷̤̤͖̈́̌̍͂̊̓̈́̈́̃̉ͅI̷̧͖͚̙͍̜͉̩̓̑̉͌̉̍̑̆̑̊̑̚M̷̨̳̥͔̬̯͉̲̺͉̀̊͒̒̑Ȉ̴̭̞̝̇Ś̴̟̦͙̥͚͈̲̘͂̿̃̏̍͜ ̸̹̪̝̖͓͚̺̫͊̓̍̆͛ͅ~

The panicking exclamations ensue as soon as the ghostly voices started to wail, echoing the words of the Ramshackle Prefect as someone ran off.

Something many people noticed when it came to Yuu's singing was that it was intentionally nice. When Yuu sings they would sweeten their voice into a light and airy tone, one which carresses each word they speak as the magic made its presence known. It brought the best out of the magic apparently. It was soothing, it was magical, it was the spoken of 'happily ever after' RSA prided on.

I feel her, I see her~

The sun caught in her raven hair~

Is blazing in me out of all control~

V̴̴̸̡̟̘̼͔́͑̓̽̕͠E̴̸̴̡͔̼̞͕͒͛̒̈́͘̕R̴̵̵̡͔͉̘͖͛͐̒̓̐͠B̵̵̸̡̞͖̺̺͉́͌̔͊͑͠ O̵̵̴͖͕̺͍̞̞͑̀̽̐̿̕ E̸̸̸̻͕̘͍̓͒̓̾͑͜T̵̵̴̢̢̞̻͍͇͒̈́͛͋͛͝ O̵̴̵̢͚̙̙͕̓̀̽̔͒̕Ṕ̵̸̴̝̫̦͎͔́̾͆͘͜E̵̵̸̟̪͔͖̻͍͋̔̐͊͝R̴̴̴̡̪̟͙͇͙̔͑͑̕̕͝E̴̴̵̪̞͖͕͔̘͑̓͆̿͘͝~

This was not singing. This was anger.

LIKE FIRE~ F̸̸̙͔̦̺͚̠̓͐̀̚͝I̴̵͍̺̟̻̻͉͆̿͌́͠͠R̵̸̪͉͎̙͖̝̓́̈́̿̔E̵̸̢̠̘̺̼̓̐̿̐̒͜͝~

HELLFIRE~ F̸̸̙͔̦̺͚̠̓͐̀̚͝I̴̵͍̺̟̻̻͉͆̿͌́͠͠R̵̸̪͉͎̙͖̝̓́̈́̿̔E̵̸̢̠̘̺̼̓̐̿̐̒͜͝~

THIS BURNING DESIRE~

It was Yuu booming their voice the loudest they could go, uncaring if the words come out hoarse or shrill. Yuu didn't care that people were wincing from the loudness of their voice or paling in terror at the unbridled fury they were shouting to the heavens.

Even the fact someone was hurriedly running towards the courtyard carrying a barrel of pumpkins paled in comparison to the sheer feral energy Yuu was busy emitting.

It was raw; it was ugly; and it was the most beautiful thing Rollo has ever seen.

"Sevens above." Dark eyes were brimming with a returning light as he stared at the cackling prefect with such adoration it made his unwilling audience take a step back, "my god has descended."

Yuu: I do not have a favourite Dxnsey song

Also Yuu: *cackles madly as they sing and set everything on fire*

[beelsnack]

Obey Me! Boys Taking Care of a Sick MC

In honor of me no longer having covid, I decided to write down how I mentally coped with having the plague  some headcanons about our boys and a sick MC. Because I’m all about the hurt/comfort life.

-----

Lucifer: “You should be resting.”

The human scowled. Of course Lucifer was standing guard at the bottom of the staircase.

“I’m just going to get some water,” their voice sounded like sandpaper against wood as they spoke. They felt like the living dead, and judging by the cool stare Lucifer was giving them, they looked it, too.

“No, you’re just going back to bed.” He caught them by the elbow as soon as they were within reach. “I’ll bring a pitcher of water to your room for you.”

“Lucif--” their complaint was cut off by a sudden coughing fit. The force of it made them double over, and they clutched at their chest with one hand while the other went to cover their mouth. Demons couldn’t catch human illnesses, but old habits die hard.

It wasn’t until their lungs stopped trying to eject themselves from their body that they realized that Lucifer had sat them down on the bottom step. He was rubbing slow, soothing circles on their back, a rare look of concern in his dark eyes. “Easy now, my dear,” he murmured as they caught their breath. “You’re shaking, are you chilled?”

“...Just a little,” they wheezed. They must not have sounded very convincing, because Lucifer quickly removed one glove and gently pressed the back of his hand against their forehead.

“Your fever has come back.” In one quick, fluid movement, he had taken the cloak from around his shoulders and wrapped it around them like a blanket. “Go back to bed, now. I’ll bring you water and something to bring your fever down,” he spoke softly, like raising his voice would trigger another coughing fit.

It was too bad they were too sick to appreciate Lucifer’s soft side.

Mammon: “…A’ight, that should be everything.”

Admittedly, he might have gone a bit overboard. But, could you blame him? He’d never nursed a sick human back to health before!

…Okay, so Lucifer may or may not have let Mammon use his credit card to get stuff for them. And he may or may not have taken a few liberties. It was for the human though!

“Mammon, holy shit,” they mumbled, poking their head out from the blanket burrito they had cocooned themselves in. “Is there anything left at the convenience store or did you buy them out?”

“Shut it.” he set the last six-pack of Gatorade (well, the Devildom equivalent of it, anyway) at the foot of their bed. “Ya’ weren’t specific, so I just got one of each!”

Their room looked like a doomsday prepper’s bunker. Cans of soup, a myriad of flavors of instant noodles, a portable heater, the works. Maybe they should have been more specific.

“Do ya’ need anything else?” Mammon sounded vaguely annoyed, but underneath the gruff tone he spoke with, his concern was obvious. They had given him a scare when they first came down with the flu two days ago, temperature so high that they ended up collapsing on their way to RAD. He had been fussing over them since. They weren’t even sure if he had slept.

“...Just one more thing.”

“Yeah?” he perked up like a dog waiting for an order from its master. “Whaddaya need?”

Instead of speaking, they wiggled their arms free of the blankets and held them out. For a moment, Mammon just stared at them in confusion. When what they were asking for finally clicked, his face grew so hot they could use it as a space heater.

“What are you, a little kid?” he grumbled, but there wasn’t even a moment’s hesitation as he climbed into the bed with them. They settled themselves against his chest, sighing contentedly. Sleep had taken over in a few heartbeats.

“...Get better soon, you hear?” they didn’t, obviously, and Mammon took the opportunity to gently pat their head, like they so often did for him. “If you’re gonna be all cute and stuff, I want ya to be conscious of it.”

Leviathan: “You know, I really thought you would take longer to go through all of these.”

The human looked like a whole new person compared to the last time Levi had seen them. They were sitting upright, although they looked ready to slide back down into their previous coma-like state any minute, and the number of blankets wrapped around them had been reduced to just one instead of three. They managed to shoot him a weak grin as they handed over the manga he had let them borrow.

As much as Levi loved staying locked away in his inner sanctum, it was only an enjoyable experience if one’s source of entertainment was also locked away with them. And he couldn’t, in hood conscience, let the human die of boredom instead of dying of illness, so he had ventured out of his lair armed with his collector’s edition box set of I’m A Scholarship Student At An Obscenely Rich School and Now I Have To Work Off A Debt Because I Broke A Vase That Belonged To A Host Club!

That had only been a few days ago, but this morning he had gotten a text from them saying that they were finished.

“It’s not like I have anything else to do, Levi.”

“Pretty sure you could have been sleeping, but okay.”

They stuck their tongue out. “I couldn’t put it down.”

“Right?” Levi nodded enthusiastically, clutching the box to his chest like it was worth his weight in gold. Actually, knowing him, he probably paid his weight in gold for it. “I definitely bawled my eyes out at the end. You have to watch the anime next, the music really brings the scene together. And, like, I’m not usually into pastel themes, but the color scheme actually really fits the mood, and - “

Somewhere in the middle of Levi’s overly-excited info dumping, the human’s eyes had slipped closed. By the time Levi realized he was geeking out, their breathing had evened out and they had slumped against the headboard.

…Oh. They looked really cute like that.

“Sheesh, c’mon, normie,” he muttered, shaking his head. “I can’t believe I bored you to sleep.”

He set down the box on their nightstand and, very carefully, so he didn’t wake them up, inched them down to lay were laying against the mountain of pillows they had. Once they were settled into a position that wouldn’t give them a crick in their neck, he pulled the blanket up to their chin.

“There,” he nodded to himself. “You rest up, because you and I are going to have an anime marathon, and I won’t forgive you if you fall asleep in the middle of it.”

They mumbled, but otherwise stayed unconscious. Levi had definitely seen this in an anime before. His heart was pounding somewhere around his throat, but he wasn’t getting this opportunity again any time soon. Gently, like he was approaching a wild animal, he leaned in close and pressed his lips to their forehead.

“Seriously, get better soon.” he murmured. “I don’t like seeing you sick.”

Satan: His leg was falling asleep.

He had been sitting in the same position for at least an hour, and if it were anyone else he simply would have shoved them off and went about his day. But, how could he push the human away when they were curled up like a kitten in his lap?

They had been complaining about being bored, since they had been too feverish to attend RAD for the past few days. So Satan, always the man with a plan, had arrived in their room ready to binge watch his favorite crime drama. Even though he had seen this show at least eight times, he still found himself getting absolutely sucked into the plot. So much so that he didn’t notice the human starting to nod off until they landed against his side.

“Honestly, you could have just told me you were tired.” he muttered, gently rearranging them so their head was resting in his lap. They made a small noise in their sleep, but otherwise remained unconscious.

It was so rare that the human was still. They seemed to have an endless source of energy, able to be embroiled in all of the shenanigans that tended to happen around the family without absolutely disintegrating. To have them finally at rest, even sick, was quite the treat. Satan couldn’t quit help himself as he reached down to pet their head.

Well, if he was going to be stuck here until they woke up, at least he had a good show to watch.

Asmodeus: “Asmo, I can bathe by myself.”

“Yeah, no, don’t even try it.” Asmo shook his head as he ushered the human into his bedroom. “You passed out in the shower the other day, darling. This is the only time I’m grateful for Mammon’s snooping, because you might still be there if he hadn’t heard you fall.”

They subconsciously touched the sore spot on their shoulder where they had collided with the wall. The pain blended in with the rest of their body aches, but the bruise certainly didn’t.

“Besides,” Asmo sat them down on the chaise lounge. “A nice, hot bath with some quality oils will rejuvenate you like nothing else. Now, go on, strip.”

When they gave him a clearly unamused look, he just laughed. “Not while you’re sick, darling. You know full well being with me requires you to be at peak energy.”

With a sigh, they began peeling themselves out of their days-old pajamas. Admittedly, they did feel like a bath would help them feel a little better. They were pretty sure they read somewhere that the steam from hot water would help clear out all the gunk in their chest. And if anyone knew the intricate rituals of bath time, it was Asmodeus.

While they were stripping, Asmo had made his way over to the Grecian temple that was his bathtub and turned on the tap. After a few moments of running his hand under the stream to test the temperature, he stood and began browsing his impressive collection of bath accoutrements. “Hm, let’s see, let’s see…here it is!”

Asmo turned around, holding up the little bottle like he had just found buried treasure. “Eucalyptus, to help clear out the lungs. It’s good for muscle aches, too!”

With a flourish, he put a few drops into the water. “Alright, ready. Can you get in yourself or do you need my help?”

“I’ve got the flu, not the plague, Asmo.”

“You. Fell. In. The. Shower.” he punctuated each word with a poke to their cheek before holding out his hand to help them. Although they grumbled, they were still feeling kind of weak, so they allowed Asmo to pull them up.

“There, now, easy does it,” he spoke softly as he guided them to sit on the edge of the tub. If this were any other situation, they would be painfully aware of the fact that they were completely naked in front of the Avatar of Lust. But, the fragrant steam rising from the water was beginning to ease the ache in their chest, and Asmo’s soft hands had begun massaging their shoulders. They barely even noticed when they were fully seated.

“You’re not coming in?” they murmured sleepily as Asmo sat himself along the edge of the tub. He just laughed.

“Next time, darling. Now, you just relax and let me take care of you.”

Beelzebub: The phrase “don’t have much of an appetite” just didn’t make sense to Beel. How could someone not want to eat? Maybe he was a bit biased, being the ever-starving Avatar of Gluttony, but still. Humans needed lots of nutrients to get better when they were sick, right? He was pretty sure that was what Satan told him.

Beel scowled, scrolling through the eighteenth listicle about foods to eat when sick. Honestly, he was making himself hungry, but he was starting to get the general idea. Looks like he’s making them some soup.

The kitchen was separated into “human” and “demon” sections, after the one time that they almost used cyanide instead of salt. Human cuisine took less time and involved less magic, so Beel knew his way around the human spice cabinet. Making the soup was the easy part, making sure it got to its intended recipient was another matter.

Climbing the stairs to the human’s room felt like a Herculean task, but he did it - mostly. He may have taken a few bites here and there. But he had purposely put more in the bowl than he knew they would be able to eat, so it was fine, right? He knocked on their door twice, listening to them shuffle around before they finally called out weakly that the door was open.

“I brought food.” he said, shutting the door behind him. “You haven’t been eating much lately.”

They poked their head miserably out of the blanket burrito they had wrapped themselves in. A thin sheen of sweat covered their forehead, but they were shaking, which meant their fever hadn’t broken yet. Did humans always take this long to get better? Another question for Satan.

“I’m not really hungry, Beel.” they mumbled, voice thick and gravelly due to the sore throat they had. “You can eat it.”

Shaking his head, Beel sat himself down on the bed beside them. “I had some already.”

“Have some more.”

“No, I made it for you.” his stomach growled, completely undermining his words. “It’s basically just broth, you can drink it.”

They wiggled around for a bit before they managed to extract themselves from the absolute cocoon they had made. “…What kind of broth?”

“Just chicken, I promise.” he laughed. “I wasn’t about to try to get you to eat a Devildom recipe.”

Finally, they got themselves into a sitting position, but even that seemed to wear them out. They flopped against Beel’s shoulder, and he definitely didn’t like how hot their skin felt against his. Their breathing was ragged as they tried to get the energy to sit up.

“Here,” Beel dipped the spoon into the broth. “I’ll help.”

“I’m not a baby…”

“No, but you are really weak.” he replied gently. “Let me help you.”

He could feel the urge to protest vibrating through their body - their independence was definitely an endearing quality of theirs. But, eventually they must have come to the conclusion that a content of tenacity between the two of them was going to take longer than simply waiting out their illness. With a huff, they opened their mouth and let Beel feed them.

“Oh, wow, this is pretty good.”

“I’m a good cook if I don’t eat the ingredients first.”

Belphegor: “I thought humans slept a lot when they got sick.”

The bags under the human’s eyes were almost as intense as they glare they gave him. When the rest of the brothers had begun arguing over something stupid, Belphegor had taken the opportunity to bundle them up and whisk them away to the peace and quiet of the attic. His intent had been to take a nice long nap with them, but apparently their lungs had a different plan.

“We should,” they groaned, sounding like their throat was made of sandpaper. “Every time I feel like I’m going to fall asleep, I start coughing.”

“That sounds counter-intuitive.”

“Tell me about it.”

Belphie rolled over so that he was lying on his side, facing them. “Well then, you picked a good nap partner.”

They blinked blearily up at him. “Why is that?”

“Come here, I’ll show you.”

He reached out, tugging them towards him until they were settled comfortably against his chest with their head tucked beneath his chin. Although he wasn’t the tallest of the brothers, he had enough height to basically surround the human. “Can you hear my heartbeat?”

“I’m too tired for you cheesy lines, Belphie.”

“No, seriously, just listen.”

He could practically hear them roll their eyes, but they quieted down. Once he was sure they were synced up with the steady ba-bump, ba-bump of his heart, he began to work his magic - literally.

He brought his hand up to cup the back of their skull, fingertips tingling as he focused his magic their. They squirmed for a moment before sighing as the cool rush of Belphie’s special brand of sleep magic washed over them.

“I told you, being tired isn’t the prob - “

“Hush,” he murmured, letting them feel his voice rumble through his chest. “Just relax for me, okay?”

Belphie massaged their scalp like he was washing their hair, working his magic into their skin. Slowly but surely he felt them soften, the tightness in their chest easing. Finally, their slightly labored breathing evened out, and the poor human finally succumbed to sleep.

“About time,” he kissed the top of their head. “You need to rest if you want to get better, so let’s sleep as long as we like, okay?”

[blackkudos]

Marlon Riggs

Marlon Troy Riggs (February 3, 1957 – April 5, 1994) was an American filmmaker, educator (professor), poet, and gay rights activist. He produced, wrote, and directed several documentary films, including Ethnic Notions, Tongues Untied, Color Adjustment, and Black is... Black Ain't. Riggs created aesthetically innovative and socially provocative films that examine past and present representations of race and sexuality in America. The Marlon Riggs Collection is now housed at Stanford University Libraries.

Early life

Riggs was born in Fort Worth, Texas, on February 3, 1957. He was a child of civilian employees of the military and spent a great deal of his childhood traveling. He lived in Texas and Georgia before moving to West Germany at the age of 11 with his family. He was the son of Jean (mother) and Alvin Riggs (father) and also had a sibling named Sascha. Later in his life, Riggs recalled the ostracism and name-calling that he experienced at Hephzibah Junior High School in Hephzibah, Georgia. He stated that black and white students alike called him a "punk," a "faggot," and "Uncle Tom." He felt isolated from everyone at the school: "I was caught between these two worlds where the whites hated me and the blacks disparaged me. It was so painful."

Riggs excelled at Nurnberg American High School, where he played football and ran track, and was elected President of the Varsity Club while only a sophomore. He also performed a solo interpretive dance in the school's talent show depicting American slaves' experiences from Africa through emancipation. From 1973 to 1974 Riggs attended Ansbach American High School's opening year in Katterbach, Germany. He was elected student body president at the military dependents school. In 1974, Riggs returned to the United States to attend college. As an undergraduate, he studied history at Harvard University and graduated magna cum laude in 1978. While a student at Harvard, Riggs became conscious that he was gay. Because there were no courses that supported the study of homosexuality, he petitioned the history department and received approval to pursue independent study of the portrayal of "male homosexuality in American fiction and poetry". As he began studying the history of American racism and homophobia, Riggs became interested in communicating his ideas about these subjects through film.

After working for a local television station in Texas for about a year, he moved to Oakland, California, where he lived for 15 years with his life partner, Jack Vincent. Riggs entered graduate school and received his master's degree in journalism with a specialization in Documentary film in 1981 from the University of California, Berkeley, having co-produced/co-directed with Peter Webster a master's thesis titled Long Train Running: The Story of the Oakland Blues, a half-hour video on the history of blues music in Oakland, California.

Film career

Upon finishing graduate school, Riggs began working on many independent documentary productions in the Bay Area. He assisted documentary directors and producers initially as an assistant editor and later as a post-production supervisor, editor on documentaries about the American arms race, Nicaragua, Central America, sexism, and disability rights. Because of his proficiency in video technology, Riggs was the on-line editor for a video production company, Espresso Productions. In 1987, Riggs was hired as a part-time faculty member at the Graduate School of Journalism at Berkeley to teach documentary filmmaking. He became the youngest tenured professor at Berkeley shortly thereafter.

That same year he completed his first professional feature documentary Ethnic Notions. An independently produced documentary, the film received technical support (online editing) from KQED, a public television station in San Francisco, and aired on public television stations throughout the United States. In Ethnic Notions, Riggs sought to explore widespread and persistent stereotypes of black people – images of ugly, savage brutes and happy servants – in American popular culture of the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Edited by Debbie Hoffmann, the film uses a narrative voice-over provided by African-American actress Esther Rolle in explaining striking film footage and historical stills which expose the blatant racism of the era immediately following the Civil War. The documentary also presents a set of contemporary interviews with expert commentators, including historians George Fredrickson and Larry Levine, cultural critic Barbara Christian, folklorist Patricia Turner, collector Jan Faulkner, and many others, who discuss the consequences of historical African-American stereotypes. This film expanded the commonly held assumptions about the parameters of documentary film aesthetics through its bold use of original performance, dance, and music to explore a historical narrative.

While Riggs continued working as an educator at Berkeley, he kept making his own films. The 1989 film Tongues Untied, a highly personalized and moving documentary about the life experiences of gay African-American men, was aired as part of the PBS television series P.O.V. The film employs autobiographical footage as well as performance, including monologues, songs, poems, and nonverbal gestures such as snapping, to convey an authentic and positive black gay identity. In order to demonstrate the harmful effects of silence on self-esteem, the film contrasts this image with negative representations of gay black men as comic-tragic stock caricatures and drag queens in contemporary American popular culture. The three principle voices of Tongues Untied are those of Riggs as well as gay rights activists and men infected with HIV Essex Hemphill and Joseph Beam. Riggs characterized the film as his legacy, his "last gift to the community," that displays him as both a filmmaker and a gay rights activist. Tongues Untied was so controversial, that its airing was a major event; some local public TV stations refused to put it on the air, while others celebrated its creation and originality. "Tongues Untied," held political backlash; Republican Senator Jesse Helms famously argued to defund the arts after its release. This documentary also paved the way for other films to come later such as Paris is Burning (1990). He described the production as his own personal "coming out" film celebrating black gay life experiences and that he ultimately became "the person, the vehicle, and the vessel" for these experiences. Riggs explained that Tongues Untied was a catharsis for him: "It was a release of a lot of decades-old, pent-up emotion, rage, guilt, feelings of impotence in the face of some of my experiences as a youth. . . It allowed me to move past all of those things that were bottled up inside me. . . I could finally let go."

In 1988, while working both on Color Adjustment and Tongues Untied, Riggs was diagnosed with HIV after undergoing treatment for near-fatal kidney failure at a hospital in Germany. The film shows the pain as well as the mentally and physically agonizing therapy that Riggs had to go through in order to deal with his kidney failure. But despite his deteriorating health, Riggs decided to continue to teach at Berkeley and make documentaries.

In the short 1990 piece Affirmations, Riggs further developed his critique of homophobia that he originally expressed in Tongues Untied. In Affirmations, a film made from the outtakes of Tongues Untied, Riggs explored the African-American males' sexuality and relationship with the African-American community at large. Voice overs of gay African-American men described their feelings of isolation from a community in which they were once raised with love and support. Some of the men expressed the lack of acceptance within the African-American community and the divide their sexual orientation caused. They vocalized they wanted to identify as both gay and African American with support from family, friends, and the African-American community. Riggs included a coming-out story of black gay writer Reginald T. Jackson and footage of black gay men marching in a Harlem African American Freedom Day Parade. In 1991, Riggs directed and produced Anthem, a short documentary about African-American male sexuality. The film includes a collage of erotic images of black men, hip-hop music, and a call to celebrate difference in sexuality.

In 1991, Marlon founded Signifyin' Works, a non-profit corporation whose mission is to produce films about African-American history and culture. The founding Board of Directors included Herman Gray, Vivian Kleiman, Cornelius Moore, and Patricia Turner.

The 1992 documentary Color Adjustment was Riggs's second film to air on the PBS television series P.O.V. The film Color Adjustment was Riggs's follow-up to Ethnic Notions, focusing on the representation of African Americans in American television from Amos 'n' Andy to the Cosby Show. However, unlike Ethnic Notions, which presents a putative, neutral stance on popular American representations of blacks, Color Adjustment presents a cultural criticism of these images through an African-American perspective on race. The film was produced with Vivian Kleiman, edited by Debbie Hoffmann, and narrated by actress Ruby Dee. It includes an original music score by Mary Watkins. Using contemporary interviews of television actors, directors, producers, and cultural commentators, the documentary conveys personal reflections and academic analyses of such television programs as Good Times and The Cosby Show.

In 1992, Riggs directed the film [Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien (No Regret)], in which five gay Black men who are HIV-positive discuss how they are battling the double stigmas surrounding their infection and homosexuality. It was commissioned by Executive Producer Jonathan Lee as part of a series of documentaries on the AIDS crisis, The Fear of Disclosure Project. The series was screened in observation of World AIDS Day and Day Without Art. It included the participation of Phil Zwickler, David Wojnarowicz, Ellen Spiro, Vivian Kleiman, and others.

In 1993, Riggs received an honorary doctorate degree from the California College of Arts and Crafts. That same year, Riggs's experimental short Anthem was featured in a collection of short films entitled Boys' Shorts: The New Queer Cinema.

Shortly after completing Color Adjustment, Riggs began work on what was to be his final film Black Is. . . Black Ain't, but he died at the age of 37 from complications caused by AIDS on April 5, 1994, before he could complete it. The project was completed posthumously by co-producer Nicole Atkinson, co-director/editor Christiane Badgley, and the Signifyin' Works Board of Directors. Much of the final text of Black Is. . . Black Ain't was recounted by Riggs in his hospital room. "It was as if the film were rolling before me," he said, "and I was just transcribing; I almost couldn't keep up." The film therefore contains many scenes of Riggs on his hospital bed. The documentary takes on the topic of African-American identity, including considerations of skin color, religion, politics, class stratification, sexuality, and gender difference that revolve around it. "In this film, Marlon Riggs meets a cross-section of African Americans grappling with the paradox of numerous, often contradictory definitions of blackness. He shows many who have felt uncomfortable and even silenced within the race because their complexion, class, sexuality, gender, or speech has rendered them "not black enough," or conversely, "too black." The film scrutinizes the identification of "blackness" with masculinity as well as sexism, patriarchy and homophobia in black America."

Poetry

Besides making documentaries and teaching at Berkeley, Riggs also wrote poetry from time to time, as evidenced in Tongues Untied, which contains several of his poems about his life experiences as a black gay man. In his poem "Tongues Untied," Riggs discusses the racism he encountered as a child while living in Georgia as well as coming out about his homosexuality. Riggs's poetry was inspired by friend, poet, and activist Essex Hemphill.

Writings

Riggs's writings were published during the late 1980s and early 1990s in various art and literary journals such as Black American Literature Forum, Art Journal, and High Performance as well as anthologies such as Brother to Brother: Collected Writings by Black Gay Men. The themes of his writings include filmmaking, free speech and censorship, and criticism of racism and homophobia.

In his noteworthy essay "Black Macho Revisited: Reflections of a SNAP! Queen," Riggs discusses how representations of black gay men in the United States have been used to shape Americans' conceptions of race and sexuality. He argues that Americans' emphasis on the "black macho" figure – the warrior model of black masculinity based on a mythologized view of African history – signifies an exclusion of black homosexual males from the African-American community, which results in their dehumanization and rationalizes homophobia. Riggs makes a distinction between the black gay man's perception of himself and his representation in America as the "Negro faggot," an extreme displacement and distortion of black homosexuality. He explains that the "black macho" image is sustained through performances such as rap music, television shows, the films of Spike Lee, and the comedy routines of Eddie Murphy. According to Riggs, the black homosexual male is therefore defined as the deviant Other in relation to the African American community, and Riggs claims that this contemporary practice mirrors the historical racist constructions of the African-American identity: "Blacks are inferior because they are not white. Black gays are unnatural because they are not straight. Majority representations of both affirm the view that blackness and gayness constitute a fundamental rupture in the order of things, that our very existence is an affront to nature and humanity."

Themes and style

Riggs's films deal with representations of race and sexuality in the United States. Riggs was critical of American racism and homophobia. He used his films to show positive images of African-American culture as well as those of physical and emotional love between black men in order to challenge representations of African Americans and black gay men in popular culture. However, he recognized that the images he conveyed would cause resistance among many Americans: "People are often frightened of difference. . . that requires that they rethink their own beliefs, their own premises, their own sense of self, culture and history, and sense of belonging. When you present anything on the level of contention, you encounter resistance."

Riggs believed that being a filmmaker was a means to communicate his message, not an end in and of itself. Riggs explained that he did not become a filmmaker because he loved films as a child but because he wanted to communicate his message: "I didn't know anything about filmmaking when I decided to become a filmmaker. What drew me to film and video was that I wanted to communicate so much. . . I wanted to communicate to the broadest possible audience and for me that was television." Riggs strongly believed in speaking out about the topics he cared about through his films. He explained that whenever he became passionate about an issue, he could not stop himself from speaking out about it: "Silence kills the soul; it diminishes its possibilities to rise and fly and explore. Silence withers what makes you human. The soul shrinks, until it's nothing."

As a graduate student at Berkeley, Riggs was educated in journalism and conventional documentary filmmaking, which stresses objectivity and employing an academic stance. But his film style quickly evolved to be rather personal and emotional. His first professional film Ethnic Notions, was composed of expert commentary, historical stills and film footage, and omniscient narration—standard elements for documentary films of the time. Yet at the same time, the film greatly departs from the norm of the day through its playful use of performance, satire and audio. Philip Brian Harper, an associate professor of English at New York University, explains that by challenging the norms of standard television documentary, Riggs was an innovator of television programming in America: "Riggs's work itself challenged television's generic boundaries. Riggs troubled broadcast convention, seen as implicitly under attack in the presentation of his work."

According to Nichols, Marlon Riggs used the Performative Mode for films such as Anthem and Tongues Untied. His use of poetry and performance conveys the affective and emotion-laden quality of performative documentary.

Awards and Recognition

Riggs's documentaries have received much critical acclaim. Riggs received a National Emmy Award in 1987 for Ethnic Notions. Tongues Untied was awarded the Teddy Award at the Berlin Film Festival. The film also received recognition from the Los Angeles Film Critics Association, the New York Documentary Film Festival, the American Film and Video Festival, and the San Francisco International Lesbian and Gay Film Festival. In 1992, Riggs was awarded the Maya Daren Lifetime Achievement Award from the American Film Institute. Additionally, Color Adjustment won the prestigious George Foster Peabody Award, Erik Barnouw Award from the Organization of American Historians, the International Documentary Association Outstanding Achievement Award, and a premiere screening the Sundance Film Festival. "Color Adjustment" also garnered a nomination for a national Emmy Award for Outstanding Individual Achievement in Research. Riggs also received the Frameline Award from the San Francisco International Lesbian and Gay Film Festival for his film Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien (No Regret). Moreover, Black is. . . Black Ain't won the Golden Gate Award at the San Francisco International Film Festival and was praised by the Sundance Film Festival. Riggs also was awarded an honorary doctorate degree from the California College for the Arts & Crafts in 1993.

Alongside Riggs's many film awards he has also been given the honor to have a building for low-income housing dedicated in his name. There is a section of a housing unit named The Marlon Riggs Apartments / Vernon Street located in Oakland, California. In 1996 a plaque with a picture of Marlon was hung inside of the building's lobby area to commemorate Riggs. At the time the housing unit was the first building constructed for low-income people with HIV/AIDS. This property is funded through The John Stewart Company and was awarded $2 million for its construction to help people living with HIV/AIDS have a stable environment.

In 2006, Riggs was awarded into the NLGJA LGBTQ Journalists Hall of Fame

In 2014, Signifyin' Works donated $100,000 to create the Marlon T. Riggs Fellowship in Documentary Filmmaking at the UC Berkley Journalism for graduate students in documentary film. It is the first Fellowship named for a documentary filmmaker at a university in the United States.

In 2019, The Brooklyn Academy of Music featured Marlon Riggs's work with a show of Race, Sex & Cinema: The World of Marlon Riggs.

Controversy

During the late 1980s and early 1990s, Riggs's production Tongues Untied triggered a national controversy surrounding the airing of the video on American public television stations. Along with his own funds, Riggs had financed the documentary with a $5,000 grant from the Western States Regional Arts Fund, a re-granting agency funded by the National Endowment for the Arts, an independent federal agency that provides funding and support for visual, literary, and performing artists. The film received much contention due to its depiction of men kissing.

News of the film's airing sparked a national debate about whether or not it is appropriate for the Federal government of the United States to fund artistic creations that offended some. Artists stressed their basic right of free speech, of representation on public airwaves, and vehemently opposed censorship of their art. However, several right-wing United States government policymakers and many conservative watchdog groups were against using taxpayer money to fund what they believed were repulsive artistic works. In the 1992 Republican presidential primaries, presidential candidate Pat Buchanan cited Tongues Untied as an example of how President George H. W. Bush was investing "our tax dollars in pornographic and blasphemous art." Buchanan released an anti-Bush television advertisement for his campaign using re-edited clips from Tongues United. The ad was quickly removed from television channels after Riggs successfully demonstrated Buchanan's copyright infringement.

Reverend Donald E. Wildmon, the president of the American Family Association, opposed PBS and the National Endowment for the Arts for airing Tongues Untied but hoped that the film would be widely released, because he believed most Americans would find it offensive. "This will be the first time millions of Americans will have an opportunity to see the kinds of things their tax money is being spent on," he said. "This is the first time there is no third party telling them what is going on; they can see for themselves."

Riggs defended Tongues Untied for its ability to "shatter this nation's brutalizing silence on matters of sexual and racial difference." He explained that the widespread attack on PBS and the National Endowment for the Arts in response to the film was predictable, since "any public institution caught deviating from their puritanical morality is inexorably blasted as contributing to the nation's social decay." In his defense, Riggs claimed that "implicit in the much overworked rhetoric about 'community standards' is the assumption of only one central community (patriarchal, heterosexual and usually white) and only one overarching cultural standard to which television programming must necessarily appeal." Riggs stated that ironically, the censorship campaign against Tongues Untied actually brought more publicity to the film than it would have otherwise received and thus allowed it to achieve its initial aim of challenging societal standards regarding depictions of race and sexuality.

[softersinned]

some notes on vampire astoria (condensed from several older posts & edited for consistency and clarity)—

ON EDUCATION & CAREER

she spends a lot of time as a student. a lot of time. she was brought up with a humanist education, raised by humanists, raised to be a humanist. she is at her happiest listening to lectures and taking notes, or debating in a classroom. she studies informally pretty much from day one, but she becomes a university student as soon as she’s legally allowed: 1869 in cambridge, though she doesn’t get a formal degree; 1920 in oxford; back to cambridge when women are granted degrees; over and over again, traveling wherever she can.

she ends up with several degrees, as a result. the bachelor’s degrees are too many to count. in order, her postgraduate work is in: history (phd, twice, first in medieval europe, and second in ancient rome); political science (phd, three times, first in england, and second in the united states, and then again in england); english literature (phd, focusing on victorian literature); art history (master’s, focusing on renaissance italian art); italian literature (phd, focusing on medieval literature); and folklore (phd, focusing on the vampire). she’s a student as often and as many times as she can be.

she keeps an extensive library. on the side, she publishes novels, one or two per generation, under different pen names and aliases.

her public persona in the modern era is as astoria montclair, art collector and gallerist. it’s a good way to be seen making money, and she has pretty significant control over how she’s perceived in a public setting. she usually stays in one place, and one identity, for twenty to thirty years; she can pass from anywhere from twenty to fifty, depending on how she styles her hair and does her makeup. her public persona always involves her marriage to baldwin.

her human covers tend to involve the arts—currently it’s owning and curating art galleries in several major cities (new york, venice, london, and tokyo, probably among others). previously, she worked with museums. before that, she managed theaters. for a brief period in the 80s she was a studio drummer for a number of punk bands. she doesn’t sing publicly, ever, but she has a nice voice. she keeps up to date on pop culture when she can. she has strong opinions on most television shows. for the record, she was a margaery girl, and was heartbroken when she died. she was pretty firmly team sansa after that.

ON PERSONALITY

she is utterly ruthless. it’s not that she’s cruel—and, in fact, she has little interest in cruelty for cruelty’s sake—it’s simply that she sees herself and the world around her with an unwavering pragmatism. it doesn’t matter if she kills humans unless it brings suspicion to her; she has no qualms about feeding on humans; she is a vampire, and vampires are a different, and objectively stronger and hardier, species. she’s not looking to kill or rule all humans, and she understands that, practically speaking, vampires are at a disadvantage if only because of the numbers, but she’s not about to pretend like she feels guilt over hunting as an apex predator would. she enjoys the hunt.

ON PHYSICALITY & ABILITY

when astoria is newly turned she has to relearn her own strength and it takes her weeks. she is small and she is not very physically strong before she’s turned; she has a high pain tolerance and she’s very quick, but she’s not particularly strong. the strength she develops is disturbing and it’s difficult. how many things does she break because she underestimates that new strength? how many doors does she tear off their hinges? how many railings does she bend? how much does she crush in her hands? worse than that, how many times does she break her own bones, forgetting that she has this new power she really cannot control? when she tries to break free from her chains, how many times does she break her arms? her wrists? and with her new awareness of sensations, the new intensity of what she feels both emotionally and physically, how horrible is that pain? she has to learn to walk again, to stand again, because every time she tries for those first weeks, she does damage to herself somehow. her rebirth is agonizing and this second infancy is just as bad.

because she has to get her tattoos redone with some regularity, usually every few years, she usually schedules a couple of days where she books two artists to tattoo her at the same time. this started in the 60s and has continued since. the baldwin tattoos are touched up every year so she’s never without them.

before being turned, she’s 5′3″. after, she’s 5′5″. she doesn’t grow much otherwise, though her hips and shoulders do widen a bit. she’s best described as having a dancer’s build: lean, long legs and arms, a long neck. throughout the centuries she tends to put this to use by learning to dance. it doesn’t lend itself as well to combat—she relies on speed and size for that, and while it helps her in hunting, it doesn’t help her much in a fight with another vampire, if she doesn’t have a weapon. she always does, though, and prefers to have a blade in each hand. 

SCARS

a small scar on her right palm from a childhood habit of digging her fingernails into her skin when she was nervous.

little bitty wear n tear scars on her hands from working magic as a teenager. nothing too exciting—a little burn scar here, a scar from a broken bottle there.

scarring around her wrists where she was shackled. two on each wrist, probably about a quarter of an inch thick, one closer to her hand and one farther, where the manacles would rub her skin raw over the nine years she was tortured (eight as a vampire).

similar scarring around her ankles, though not quite so thick.

a decently-sized scar on her back, just below her right kidney, from where she was stabbed, more than once, during the same period, as part of evander’s experimentation;a very thin scar across her throat, also from evander during that period; several long and deep scars in her right calf, caused by evander’s daughter tearing at her leg during a fight.

one more spectacular stab wound, through her left shoulder, from elyssa in the moments before astoria subdued and killed her.

and a few smaller stab wounds, obtained throughout the years, none of them particularly noteworthy in her eyes or really all that visible unless you’re studying her.

two bite scars from baldwin: one over her heart vein, and the other on the left side of her neck.

ON GOD & MAGIC

she is just trying to heal this open bleeding wound in her psyche after being torn away from her magic. and i love the implications of that when she doesn’t know how to get water to the right temperature without magic and so she takes either scalding or cold baths for the longest time because she can’t manage the right combination of hot and cold. in a d&d setting, if she can’t cross holy ground, would divine healing cause damage rather than fix it? who is she when she no longer has a weapon to rely on (her magic) and instead has to rely on herself (when she has, kind of by accident, become a weapon)?

ON NAMES

astoria grim, first and foremost. this is the name she’s born to, and this is the name that means the most to her, for a long, long time. it’s the name she used as a witch, before being turned.

cassandra carminati. after leo finds her, astoria agrees that she needs to take on a new identity, and she becomes cassandra carminati—leonardo's wife, as far as human society is concerned. this is the name by which she’s recorded in bath’s marriage records in the mid-late sixteenth century. 

after this, she goes by astoria grim again, for quite some time. she figures that she’s well-hidden enough that it’s not likely that anyone will find her if they’re looking, and besides, who’d look for a thirty-year-old woman when the astoria grim who should be alive would be in her seventies?

then, briefly, she becomes ileana blackwood. she’s been found, and by her cousins’ direct descendants, and this poses a threat to her survival, so she fakes her death and takes her grandmother’s name, and the surname of a young man she knew and had a brief affair with during her time in the english court.

when she and baldwin are reunited and mate, she takes the name astoria de clermont. any name or variation she uses after that features his surname. in modern settings, she is known as astoria montclair.

[satoshi-mochida]

The Caligula Effect: Overdose is coming to PlayStation 4, Switch, and PC via Steam in North America and Europe in 2019, publisher NIS America announced at Anime Expo 2018.

A $64.99 limited edition including a copy of the game, official soundtrack, official hardcover art book, “Beautiful Lies” tear-resistant poster, and collector’s box is currently available for pre-order on the NIS America Online Store (PS4, Switch).

Here is an overview of the game, via NIS America:

About

Mobius. An idyllic world that exists for the sake of letting people forget about the pain and problems of reality. In this world created by a sentient vocaloid program, μ (Mu), reality and fantasy has become blurred, allowing people to relive their high school years in bliss. Yet in this seemingly beautiful and perfect world, something is amiss. Escape from this false paradise with your fellow students and return to reality in The Caligula Effect: Overdose!

Key Features

An Overdose of New Features – The Caligula Effect: Overdose boasts enhanced visuals and gameplay! Explore new scenarios, endings, and the “Forbidden Musician Route” while escaping the virtual world of Mobius.

The New Faces of Kishimai High – Play as the newly added female protagonist! Plus, meet two new members of the Go-Home Club, who each have their own new Ostinato Musician to face.

Use the Imaginary Chain! – Turn-based battle meets exhilarating action in this refined JRPG battle system! Develop a flawless strategy after using the Imaginary Chain to predict what your enemies will do next!

Unite and Escape – Sometimes, it’s hard to go at it alone. Befriend over 500 other students in this imaginary paradise to improve your skills in battle and ultimately return to reality.

Watch the announcement trailer below. Visit the official website here.

[buysmithandwesson-blog]

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[mutatedangels-a]

Finals week was a pain in the ass for everybody on campus.

Ever the cynic, Jamie didn't buy any of the heads when they told him to keep morale within the students and the faculty up. Stay positive, they said. Just believe and you will achieve. Those messages were splayed all across the university and were practically inescapable, much to his nausea.

Unless, of course, you were in his somewhat dingy, dark office. There was no such thing as light and airy in his space. All the furniture was charcoal-stained wood and worn leather. His bookshelves were filled with collector's and leather-bound editions of his favorite works, the more modern titles with their eyesore spines piled messily in every corner. His blinds were almost always closed, the only light filtering through a watered-down shade of amber from the outside. And of course, there was his lamp and pendant ceiling light, both of which resembled the color of that sifted, buttery-yellow sun.

Jamie took respite here during most lunches, and usually after a quick run to the coffee shop. It seemed as if everybody was on edge because even the barista was jittery. She'd spilled his coffee all over him upon handing it to him, dousing him in the lukewarm liquid (he always asked for it not piping hot) and staining his sweater. He was in the middle of changing out of it and into a band t-shirt he'd had sitting in his office (thanks, The Cure on their Just Like Heaven tour in the mid-90s) when he heard a tap on the door.

A quick glance showed him it was Tobi. "Wait just a sec," he muttered, really meaning to yell it a bit louder than that so she wouldn't come in while he was changing. She didn't seem to hear him, though, as a second later, she was barreling in. He hurriedly pulled his shirt over him.

"Jesus Christ, kid, haven't you heard 'patience is a virtue'?" Jamie teased as he headed over to his desk, taking a seat.

But she looked a little tumbledown. His brows furrowed with concern, at the ready to listen to whatever she had to rant about. After all, that was what he was here for.

"Eh, yeah. She roped me into manning some sort of spelling bee for the middle school they're having next week," he said, sighing. "But don't worry. I didn't mention you at all. I think she's just a little jealous and surprised that some students here actually visit their professors. I don't blame her."

He could tell something was upsetting her, or at the very least, just dragging her down. So he kept his explanation of his week short. "It's been just as exhausting as it usually is. The girl at the coffee shop spilled coffee on me." He shook his head, looking down to straighten up his shirt. There were a few wrinkles on it, but slipping his jacket over it would probably do the trick and keep him professional-looking.

Glancing back up at her, he asked, "How 'bout you? Trouble with algebra again?"

Tobi let out a startled squeak as he teased her about her swearing, her small hands clamping over her mouth. For a brief moment, she genuinely looked concerned, but the look quickly melted into contempt. She genuinely considered grabbing something out of her bag and hurling it at his smug head. Maybe she had an apple in her lunchbag...

"With his reading comprehension, I wouldn't be surprised. Wonder if that little twit has ever apologized to anyone in his damn life," Tobi muttered as she rooted around in her bag. Damn. No apple. He lived to see another day.

Her face squirreled up at the mention of Mrs. Norman. Tobi let out a small laugh, leaning back an shaking her head.

"Oh, c'mon, you don't want to be the face of the 'say no to drugs' faire they tried to run last semester? You don't want to hang out at the stupid tables they have set up around the school in the beginning of the fall semester to show the freshmen how to get around?" A sound that was nothing less than a cackle escaped her lips.

She glanced behind her, jumping a little at the sounds of tapping on glass. Tobi never did like anything coming up from behind her. It was just...oh, speak of the damn middle aged devil. Mrs. Norman was nice enough, but damn she was so...cookie cutter. October never really vibed with that.

An empathetic look was hurled Jamie's way, and Tobi shook her head.

"Nah, I appreciate it. I've got it under control. I probably should do that thing where I study for your class instead of harassing you for an hour," she teased gently as she got up.

"Thank you, Professor." Her voice was softer. It wasn't necessarily quiet, it just lacked the usual bite and playfulness. Instead, there was a tenderness or an affection. As quick as it was there, it was gone, and so was she.

Exam prep was absolutely reaming her. Tobi couldn't remember how long it had been since her last drop-in on her favorite English professor. Today felt like the first day she genuinely felt like she had time to breathe instead of just shove her face into a book and cry because math was so hard.

Her knock was gentle but audible, and Tobi barely waited for his acknowledgement before opening his office door. She knew him by now, and she knew his routine by now.

Tobi offered him a wave as she dropped her bag on the floor. While she wasn't in her chair today, she was using her cane. The device was quite a sight because Tobi had covered it in stickers and even put spikes on the damn thing to deter people from touching it. The only way it could be comfortably grabbed was by someone her size grabbing it at the right angle. Only Tobi knew the right angle.

She slid into the chair across from his desk, offering a small grin. Her cheeks were flushed pink, and she looked a little worse for wear, but the playful glint to her eyes was still there. Tobi bounced a little in her seat.

"So, tell me, was Mrs. Norman successful? Are you the face of her next charity event? I can see it now, you, standing there, running a soup drive..." Tobi giggled.

"Were you telling her my dark secrets? She was giving me a weird look. Not, like, rude or anything, she's as polite as ever, but she keeps giving me this look like she knows something." Tobi wiggled her fingers menacingly, like she was casting a spell.

"Maybe she's planning to sacrifice me to her weird, suburban charity drive gods."

A pause. Tobi fussed with her hair, pulling it away from her face as she looked him over.

"How is finals prep treating you? You already know how they're treating me. I didn't cry, I was having a brief moment, and you can't prove anything else in a court of law." Tobi pointed at him and laughed.

While Tobi had no trouble in English and other courses, she had a horrid time with math, and tended to cry in sheer frustration over it. Dyscalculia, dyslexia's weird, math coded cousin, tended to make algebra a waking nightmare. Despite this, she was passing her courses.

[jafreitag]

Grateful Dead Monthly: Lindley Meadows (Golden Gate Park) – San Francisco, CA 9/28/75

On Sunday, September 28, 1975, the Grateful Dead played a concert at Golden Gate Park’s Lindley Meadows in San Francisco, California.

Lindley Meadows

From the Wiki: “In the 1860s, San Franciscans began to feel the need for a spacious public park similar to [NYC’s] Central Park. Golden Gate Park was carved out of unpromising sand and shore dunes that were known as the Outside Lands, in an unincorporated area west of San Francisco’s then-current borders.” Frederick Law Olmsted was the driver. He was the guy who conceptualized Central Park, and later Jackson and Washington Parks in Chicago, as well as the whole shebang for Chi’s 1893 Columbian Exposition and most of the nearby U of C campus. Olmstead “proposed a plan for a park using native species suited for San Francisco’s dry climate; however, the proposal was rejected in favor of a Central Park-style park needing extensive irrigation.” Nice try, man.

The park got a Commissioner in 1871, and the San Francisco Recreation and Parks Department began overseeing its development. Between then and now, it’s been basically urban green space. Per the Wiki, GGP is roughly the same shape as Central Park, but twenty-percent bigger. It’s bounded by the Pacific Ocean on the West and the Haight on the East. And it’s the third most-visited park in the United States, after Central Park and the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C.

So Lindley Meadows?

See the oval on the left side of that sat pic? It’s Golden Gate Park Polo Field. Apparently, Lindley Meadows is the green area that sits just above its northeast corner. Guys, I’ve never been to California, much less SF. I’m not a super-traveled person, so some of these venue write-ups seem poser-y. They’re not intended to be. Apologies for the lack of local knowledge, and feel free to add anything like that below the line.

The Dead played exactly four shows in 1975. On 3/25, they played a benefit for San Francisco Students Need Athletics, Culture, and Kicks (SF SNACK) with the Doobies, the Starship, Santana, Dylan & Baez, and Neil Young. The band’s set was comprised of the Blues for Allah material that everybody pretends to dig (but nobody really does). I’m not familiar with that show. On 6/17, they played at Winterland, and the setlist was also BFA-forward. I’m not familiar with that show, either, but, according to the Grateful Dead of the Day blog, it gets attention nowadays. On 8/13, they played at the Great American Music Hall – that’s One from the Vault, and we’ve covered it before. Finally, on 9/28, they played at Lindley Meadows. Single set show, which clocks in at just under two hours. A lot of BFA material, but a lot of well-toured and well-beloved chestnuts, too.

Photo credit: Alvan Meyerowitz

In a 2008 post about this show, the Grateful Dead Listening Guide blog makes two points. First, there’s an absolutely epic audience recording. To wit: “[T]his is one of the audience tapes that historically was said to have been recorded by the band (Phil Lesh in particular) from the stage itself … It is absolutely one of the very best of the best AUDs. But Phil didn’t tape it. Phil didn’t make any tapes.”

GDLB continues, and this is great:

“[B]efore this century [meaning the ’00s], if you weren’t in the most enshrined trading circles, you couldn’t find a complete copy of this AUD to save your life (and the real deal master itself only just went into circulation in May 2008). When you might have run into this recording (I was lucky enough to score 45 minutes of the show on cassette about 12 years ago), there was no way you could accept that it was an AUD at all. Clearly Phil and the band had to have had a hand in making this tape, right? It just sounded WAY too good. And there was the fact that there were a painful amount of right channel dropouts throughout the tape which allowed you to appreciate the quality, but never really left you wanting to listen to the tape again because of the pain involved in those dropouts.

Then the SBD came on the scene, sounding super duper. Someone digitized the AUD (a multi-gen version) and spent the time patching the dropouts with the left channel – palatable now, the AUD was a dizzying drink from the fountain of audience magic. Well friends, that was nothing…

I’m not going to attempt to document the story of taper Bob Menke here on these pages. Let’s just say that BadBob (his own moniker) bleeds the history of Grateful Dead taping and collecting. He’s one of those fellows whose name lands in the inner circle when playing the dart game of Dead tapers. ‘Nuff said. Menke’s story has been one of clouded half truths, misunderstandings, and mystery in the eyes of tape collectors. Over the last number of years, the real Bob Menke has made his way into the digital scene, so a lot of the mystery has faded. But, it sure did fuel the fires that made this particular tape one of such grand story telling. This is one to tell the grandkids about, to be sure.

So Menke recently digitally transferred his master, and the MOTB crew [dunno] finished it off with heroic editing (glad I didn’t face this task). And now we have this AUD for the ages, in its most beautiful glory.

The recording is so good, it makes the AUD vs. SBD debate seem silly. It’s a little unfair, like bringing an NBA all star off the bench at a junior high basketball game. So much so, that it’s fair for a SBD supporter to cry foul – ‘Oh, well, 09/28/75! You can’t talk to me about that show. That’s not fair.’ Regardless, when you want to know what it might have sounded like pressed up against the stage for this hallmark Dead show in the year after they retired (you may never see them again), this is it my friends. Cripplingly good.”

There’s a link to the Menke AUD below, but on to the second point. Apparently, the band was “high” – as in, their performance was chemically enhanced by LSD. Again, GDLG:

“Then there’s the well enough substantiated story that the band was higher than kites for this show. While it has always been very well understood that this band played under the influence of LSD many many many times, there are some shows that come to mind when Deadheads talk about shows where the band was ‘known’ to have been chemically altered for sure: 08/27/72, 05/11/78, and 09/28/75 among them. So, this places an extra special sparkle to re-living the day’s concert when listening.

Also, there is the fact that a baby was born during the show [check banter after Slipknot!], with the band and stage announcers doing their best to help.”

Acid, a baby, and no deaths? It’s like a good time Altamont. Right, Jerry?

GDOTD offers some listening notes:

“It opens with a sharp and focused Help On The Way before heading into a moody Slipknot!, which rages in the latter half. Rather than transitioning into Franklin’s at that point, as they had during the two other times they had paired those songs, the Slipknot! ends, and they launch into a smoking The Music Never Stopped. On that tune, Donna adds lovely backing vocals, as she does throughout the afternoon.”

More GDOTD:

“[A]fter a bit of banter, they finally hit the Franklin’s Tower, playing in mind-meld form throughout with Phil throwing down and the entire band contributing to a seismic jam after the ‘listen to the music play’ line. Then, Bobby announces that they will be playing a cowboy tune, before rolling into Big River, throughout which Keith serves up some incredible fills. After It Must Have Been The Roses, a marvelous Truckin’ takes off and eventually steers into a blistering jam … [T]he boys slow things up just a notch, Phil rains down a series of bombs, and Jerry streaks around before ceding the stage to the drummers. The Drums themselves are transcendent, but the Stronger Than Dirt that follows is face melting. What’s more, the transition into Not Fade Away is rapturous as the drummers drive on the change, but the rest of the guys resist, teasing out the last of the Stronger Than Dirt theme while slowly falling to the inevitable momentum of NFA. And what a Not Fade Away it turns out to be with serious, imaginative jamming all the way through to the Going Down The Road Feeling Bad, which is itself resplendent. Then One More Saturday Night caps the show in rocking, high-energy fashion.”

That’s cool, but there are listening notes, and then there’s our guy. Without further ado, here’s everyone’s favorite. The master of zero disasters, the king of schwing, the 88’s tickler, the Peloton’s boss, the cherry on top, the sun behind that one annoying cloud, the reason that outside cats come back home, the guy who rolled his eyes at all those Dos Equis commercials b/c #beentheredonethat, the Ig influencer behind @31daysofdead, and the better half of this gotdam thing. Man/myth/legend is just a trope until you meet him in person. He’s handsome; he’s erudite. He’s a man beyond description and, in his rare spare time, a member of Jehovah’s favorite choir. He’ll break it down, fo’realize. Ladies and Gentlemen, LN Grateful Deaditor, ECM…

“Hey now, kids! Today we’ve got some ‘Hiatus Dead’ for you. As most of you know, Hiatus Dead refers to that period of time between 10/20/74 (Winterland) and 6/3/76 (Portland, OR) when the Grateful Dead took some time off from touring. During this period, the band played only four shows, all of them in 1975. The show JF and I are featuring in this month’s edition of Grateful Dead Monthly – September 28, 1975 – is the last of those 4 shows and it would be the last show for over 8 months. This show is unique for a lot of other reasons too. First, it was a free show in Lindley Meadows in Golden Gate Park at a time when that kind of thing didn’t happen anymore like it did back in the 60’s. Another thing the band hadn’t done in a long while was play a show while they were tripping. Legend has it that they revisited that part of their past as well on this day. Although this has never been confirmed, it sure makes for a good story and at least seems plausible given the overall strangeness and looseness of the music compared with their very tight performance at the Great American Music Hall just a month prior on August 13th. In addition, unlike most GD shows where the band is virtually mute, here there is a lot of funny and odd stage banter – Bobby’s joke about getting around to all the old favorites that they can remember, the calls for a doctor to attend to the woman in the audience that was going into labor and Phil clarifying for the crowd that Truckin’ is NOT pronounced Truck-ing.

Another factor making this show unique is the weather which was unseasonably chilly for September. With temperatures down in the 50’s, it felt more like November than September which brings us to another unique aspect about this show – the band’s attire. Instead of Bobby wearing his signature Lacoste polo shirt and cutoff shorts, on this day he is wearing a Pendelton jacket with bell-bottoms. And, Garcia is rocking a leather jacket with Puma sneakers(!) While we are talking about attire, let’s also talk about instruments. This was allegedly the debut of Jerry’s new guitar, Travis Bean. It’s the guitar that he would use until 9/28/77 when he started playing his Doug Irwin Wolf again. Keith plays an electric Fender Rhodes the entire show. These two instruments certainly influenced the sound of the band that day.

Which brings us to the MUSIC…

The Grateful Dead played one set which clocked in at approximately 1 hour and 45 minutes. They opened with Help>Slipknot. It’s the third one ever but just the second with lyrics. Jerry botches the last verse. It happens. Slipknot! is the third one but the first not going into Franklin’s Tower. It is played slowly, but deliberately, and they pull off the complex arrangement with flying colors. However, things come to a rather abrupt end when they call a halt because Jerry apparently breaks a string – he is audibly absent in the closing riffs. This is the point when the woman is having a baby too. 

Once everything on stage is ironed out and a doctor is located for the woman in labor, the band launches into the Music Never Stopped. It is only the second performance and is a mere 6 minutes. Donna crushes her verse. This early version has only a few bars of the drifty mid-jam section and then charges right into the ending jam which only hints at the potential that it would soon become. Once the song concludes there are more stage announcements. A doctor has been located and now there are pleas for a stretcher.

“Oh, man. That’s weird. A stretcher?”

They Love Each Other is up next – perhaps inspired by the woman having the baby(?). Either way, it’s the first in over 1½ years and the first without the bridge section. This performance has a unique sound and tempo that is played somewhere in between the peppy versions from the 1973-74 era and the slower versions from the 1976 and later era. It is almost reggae-like. Jerry gives it a sensitive reading – sweet and subdued in its expressiveness. Afterwards Phil comes to the microphone to tell the father of the newborn child that his help is needed (Help on the Way?). That’s when Bobby comes to the microphone to assure the fans who are calling out requests that ‘we will get around to all the old favorites that we can remember.’ Cheers and laughter ensue to which Bobby responds, ‘you wouldn’t be laughing if you knew what that meant.’

Bobby cameltoe, ftw.

With the the band launches into a spirited version of one of their oldest songs from their first album – Beat it on Down the Line. Maybe this was a musical message to the father of the newborn baby to get moving and help his wife(?) Weir’s old buddy and bandmate from Kingfish, Mattew Kelly joins on harmonica. His playing is faint, but present, and adds a nice counterpoint to Jerry’s guitar. 

The band completes the piece of their musical triptych that is missing due to the equipment and baby interruptions by playing a stand-alone Franklin’s Tower from a cold start. It is the third version ever and it is exquisite. The drums are groovin’ and Jerry’s on fire especially after the ‘if you get confused, listen to the music play’ line. Great call and response at the end. This is the song that made it onto the abbreviated version [featuring one song from every year] of the box-set 30 Trips Around the Sun that appears on Spotify.

There are more calls from the audience for songs – apparently somebody is calling for Truckin’ but Phil does not like the way the fan is pronouncing it. ‘Did I hear someone say TRUCK-ING? That’s not how you say it. You don’t say TRUCK-ING. But anyway, we’re not gonna play that now. We’re gonna play something else.’ Weir then comes to the microphone to announce that ‘Billy would like to make a small point to the fact that we’re playing a cowboy tune.’ That leads into rootin-tootin’ version of Big River which has nice solos from Jerry and Keith. 

A letter-perfect reading of It Must Have Been The Roses follows. Jerry’s voice is at its pure, sweet unaffected peak. Excellent vocal harmonies from Jerry and Donna. Keith’s work on the electric piano provides the perfect accompaniment.

Phil returns to his Truck-ING banter which signals that the band is now ready to play it. Weir warns the crowd that he’s not going to remember the words, and he makes good on his promise by not only forgetting most of them, but also forgetting to sing part of the second verse at all.  No worries. The jam that follows is fantastic thanks in large part to all the tight material the band had been playing over the past year when they were rehearsing and recording Blues for Allah. There is some heated controversy among fans about the jam that comes out of Truckin’. Some have said that it is The Eleven. In fact, the 30 Trips box set refers to it that way. I don’t hear it but it’s an exciting jam for sure! To me, it sounds more like a King Solomon’s/Stronger Than Dirt groove which is what the band segues into following Drums. This is the fourth and final King Solomon’s. It’s definitely the loosest.There are a few rough spots at first it recovers and maintains a solid groove.

There is a loose transition into Not Fade Away. The lead in is funky and rockin.’ Garcia peels off a slide-flavored, acid-drenched solo which is the start of a long, spacey transition to GDTRFB which is also funky with some amazing energy. Saturday Night caps the show in rocking, high-energy fashion. a hoarse-sounding Phil bids the audience farewell, ‘Let’s have another party like this again sometime.’ And with that, the band slipped back into hibernation mode and would not perform again for another eight months.”

As Ed mentioned, this show is part of the massive 30 Trips Around the Sun box set.

And it’s still on the Live Music Archive. Transport to the soundboard recording HERE, a matrix recording HERE, and Menke’s audience recording HERE. According to Menke,

“It was an overcast day and we got there early. About 8:30 in the morning. That is how we ended up about 10-15 feet from the stage. The mics were mounted on broom sticks (handheld) and they were split about 20 feet apart. The upfront vocals I believe are the product of a small (relative to PA speakers) speaker on the floor of the stage next to the right PA column. The vocals seem to be blasting from that speaker. Another very intersting point is the fact that the Jefferson Starship opened and their sound from the same PA absolutely sucked. Nothing approaching the clarity and sound quality the Dead got from the same system.”

There you go.

More soon.

JF

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[riza-quevada-blog]

Summed Up in Seven Artworks

I decided to synthesize my learnings by looking at the works around me. Through this, I wanted to practice my critical abilities in consuming these works and the implications of it, and not just take it as it is. 

Picture Source

Using the four planes of analysis, I will be analyzing one of my favorite BTS songs, “Answer: Love Myself”. Firstly, the tune of the song is upbeat and light, giving a positive feeling to the listener. The melody would make the listener sing along and lift their spirits up a little. Secondly, the lyrics and the message it contains adds to the positive feeling its melody provides. For a little background, the song is about accepting and loving yourself despite all the flaws and the pains. 

Loving myself might be harder Than loving someone else Let’s admit it  The standards I made are more strict for myself

The message evokes the listeners’ emotions especially if they resonate with what they are saying. To dive deeper into the context of the work, it’s entitled “Answer: Love Myself” which is part of the album “Love Yourself: Answer”. This album is one of their albums under the Love Yourself trilogy in which they promoted self-acceptance and self-love. BTS had been making music since 2013, delving into topics that relate to the youth such as the problematic school system, romance, beauty of friendships, and the self. 

I value this work in high regard due to personal reasons. It is more than just a song for me as it affected my life and how I view myself greatly. I can say the BTS’ purpose of influencing the youth positively is a success to me as an individual.

However, I could not say the same for other people. Some would refuse to listen to it just because they don’t understand Korean, or because it isn’t the genre they prefer. Despite that, I respect people’s perspectives on this song and BTS in general. This is what most fans of any artist lack. It made me realize, as I got more and more involved with fan culture, that most fanatics do not accept criticisms made towards their idols and regard them as the best among others. I find this very problematic and if you, as a fan, aren’t critical about the fan posts you consume and share, you may be part of the toxicity.

My Essay: Reading the Image

Reading my essay once again, I got deep into elaborating on the details seen in the work and the context surrounding it. However, I wasn’t able to evaluate it against the historical and present context. Historically, the “Procession of Archers” may be considered as a good artwork as it shows the usual style and theme of art back in the day. Printing was a common technique used before the invention of photography, so this type of work may be seen a lot. On the other hand, I honestly think this would not be appealing to the people of today. It may be valued as part of history, but if an artist were to create a print similar to this style, it wouldn’t be as appreciated due to the more modern ways of creating art available today.

Picture Source

In terms of art and reality, an industry that isn’t usually talked about comes to mind: the porn industry. To the extent of my knowledge, the portrayal of sex and women in pornography is incredibly toxic and harmful. Porn sites are packed with images that are more centered on women, making it seem that most videos are catered to men. This further perpetuates the concept of the male gaze; in fact, you won’t be able to see many videos catered to women’s needs. Additionally, the porn industry represents modern and postmodern simulacra: this industry capitalizes on peoples’ needs and uses the labor of (mostly) vulnerable people who had no choice but to do sex work. Furthermore, rape, abuse, child pornography, among others, are the most common illegal and unethical actions that a great number of porn videos show (although not explicitly). These are often just hinted and glossed over with an unrealistic plot and acting; if you’re not critical to the videos you consume, there’s a huge chance you may internalize these harmful notions.

I am not saying that porn is bad, as I do believe that sex work is work (but only if it’s consensual), but the body that governs this industry allows harmful (virtual) realities to take place on people’s screens, which may transcend dangerously to the actual world if these viewers aren’t critical.

Check out: @everydayimpunities on Instagram

The podcast I did with my group mates was honestly enjoyable to work on since it challenged me to think deeper about the realities presented by the work of art we chose. We picked the Instagram account @everydayimpunities which features pictures taken during the actual scenes of various social injustices nationwide, and sometimes outside the country. We tackled the work from different angles and perspectives and identified its role in the development of art. My main takeaway from this is that art always had a powerful impact on people’s awareness of social and political issues, but due to our technology today, it is even more powerful and wide-reaching. However, it also worth noting that there are still some risks and dangers in this modern technology. Although we have freedom of expression, people of power abuse their abilities to silence those who speak against them. It may be easy and convenient to just hit the Tweet button whenever we have something to say, but there might be grave consequences if we do it carelessly.

Picture Source

Adding on to the topic of BTS and K-Pop, the rise of BTS showed me the internalized superiority of the Western world. Even before, there’s this ugly perception of K-pop that made it seem like it’s ‘low art’. In the Philippines, K-pop fans were looked down upon for idolizing artists who “just sing and dance” and male idols who they called “gay” (as if it’s an insult) for wearing makeup. K-pop may be getting into the mainstream nowadays, but the rise of BTS constantly shows how Western media (and its people) are reluctant to accept an industry of talents just because they do not produce music in English. Although the said band is getting so big, they are still often mistreated by the media since they are people of color and produce music in Korean. They are treated like an “other” all the time despite being as, if not more, talented as these huge mainstream artists. In other words, they aren’t valued as artists the same way society values big singers such as Beyonce, Drake, and the like. Their songs and their listeners are often judged upon with haters saying, “why do you even listen to that? You don’t even understand it” as if translations of their wonderful messages aren’t available on the net. There’s this symbolic violence in how locals and the media react to uprising POC (people of color) artists, making it extra hard for them to enter the global scene. This issue can also be seen in other forms of art like the recent release of “Parasite” by Bong Joon Ho which achieved a well-deserved recognition but also garnered condescending criticisms from racist people.

Watching our video essay made me understand the concept behind collecting thousands of fashion items such as footwear, bags, and clothes. Although as a sustainability advocate, I do not resonate nor support it, I can’t hate on people who do collect since we all have different values and belief systems. Collecting dozens of expensive, limited-edition hype shoes that I won’t even wear once in my life may sound absurd and wasteful to me, but for some people, these are expressions and representations of a culture that they are part of. This may apply to collectors of figurines, luxury items, and even fan merchandise as well. They collect these things that have value to them personally, not necessarily aiming to appeal to what society says.

My Identity Map

My identity map consists of objects and symbols that represent who I am to the very core. It may all seem literal and that it speaks for itself, but these images display a much deeper portrayal of my core values. For instance, I am often described as a goal-oriented and organized person, setting systems to achieve my laid-out dreams. To represent this, I used images of my body goals, house goals, business goals, and lifestyle goals. However, these pictures do not only portray my goals and my dreams, but also the values I already have. I am an advocate of sustainability and a student of business. Those two combined, I aim to be a businessperson creating businesses that would be rooted in sustaining life and not centered around making a lot of money and being rich.

Among the prompts listed, I wasn’t able to depict my family and heritage, things to forget, and things to figure out. Instead of putting an image of my family, I inserted an image of BTS who I consider as the people who have created a positive impact on my growth as a person. Moreover, since I initially planned to make this as my dream board which I could look at every day to have a visual representation of my dreams, I didn’t want to put ‘things to forget’  since I would not forget it if I see it every day. (Also because it’s my fault for not knowing all prompts should be visible.)

Overall, I think this map wholly represents who I am and who I can be. As I mentioned in my write-up, I am still growing, therefore this identity map is expected to change over time.

I do not own the pictures used in this Identity Map.

[junker-town]

The most expensive video games right now might be sitting in your basement

These sports games are full of memories but the open market has other ideas.

Everyone has their favorite sports video game. The scuffed copy of NBA Jam Tournament Edition you jammed in your Super Nintendo more times than you can count, Madden NFL 2004 where Michael Vick was so broken you could rack up 300 yard rushing with ease, or NCAA Football 14, a final chance to remember how amazing college football games could be.

These memories are valuable. They’re worth everything to you — but the open market has other ideas. There are so old, bizarre sports games that could be sitting in a box in your parents’ attic right now worth enough to pay off your student loans, or at least a month or two rent. Similarly there are objectively some sports games so horrifically awful history deemed them to be worth absolutely nothing.

Kris Paine owns and runs “Well Played Games,” an arcade and vintage game store in Greenville, North Carolina. He uses a system shared by second-hand games stores across the country that tells him what stores charge on average for used games, and what absolutely nobody wants. It’s the best metric we have to truly determine how much we care about games as a society. I asked Paine for his list of the most (and least) valuable sporting games right now. This might result in you having the best day of the year, or just being grumpy about the $20,000 game you know got sold at a yard sale for a nickel.

The most expensive sports games right now.

No. 1: Family Fun Fitness Stadium Events (NES)

A video game Holy Grail, a loose copy of Stadium Events sells for over $9,000 on the open market. If you have it complete with box and manual you’re looking at a game which last sold for $29,251.

Released in September of 1987, Stadium Events is a game you have probably played — but never knew it by this name. Initially released in a very short run, Nintendo re-issued the game as World Class Track Meet to sell alongside the “Power Pad” peripheral. Players would run and jump on an often malfunctioning Power Pad, competing in Olympic-style races.

That version is probably the one you own. I’m sorry to tell you it’s worth nothing. However, if you somehow purchased the game before Nintendo re-branded it you’re sitting on one the rarest video games of all time. Nintendo typically did production runs of 10,000 units, though collectors believe far less copies of Stadium Events were created, due to the change in title.

No. 2: Exertainment Mountain Bike Rally/Speed Racer (SNES)

There have been some really, really weird video game peripherals over the years — but nothing quite compares to the ancient Peleton grandfather, the “Extertainment Life Cycle.” A crossover product between Nintendo and exercise bike manufacturer “Life Cycle,” this was really Nintendo’s first attempt at cornering the lifestyle/fitness market in video games. It flopped so spectacularly they didn’t try it again until the release of the Wii.

The big issue is that the bike cost $800 on its release in 1994. Accounting for inflation that makes it $1,384 today. There were also only two games that supported the Extertainment Life Cycle, the pack-in combo of Mountain Bike Rally and Speed Racer. Yes, that Speed Racer, from the anime — except you’d pedal to make the Mach 5 drive.

It’s unclear how many copies of the pack in game still exist, but a loose copy is worth $1,346, with a complete in box one selling for $2,683.

No. 3: Daytona USA Championship [Net Link Edition] (Sega Saturn)

DAAAAYTOOOOONAAAAAAAAA!

A relic of a now hilarious time, this edition of the iconic arcade game was released in the internet’s infancy and represents one of the first games that could be played online. This used the incredible looking “Sega Net Link,” which was a partnership between Sega and early internet service provider Planetweb, Inc. Using all the power a 28.8 kbps modem could muster, it allowed players to compete online for the relatively low cost of $199. Keep in mind, this was at a time where PC gaming was prohibitively expensive for most people.

Still, the Sega Net Link didn’t attract too much attention and the Sega Saturn was later replaced with the Dreamcast. Still, if you have a copy of the Net Link version of Daytona USA it’ll fetch $581 for a loose copy, and over $1,000 if you have it in the box.

And now the cheapest sports games right now

They can’t all be gems waiting to make you extreme amounts of money, and these games prove that in incredible fashion. Any chances of these ever being worth anything is nothing, and keeping them around your house just hurts any items they’re stored next to.

No. 1: Enduro Racer (Commodore 64)

You might have fond memories of this on the Sega Master System or the arcade, but the Commodore 64 version was a steaming pile of trash. Even Commodore 64 collectors tend to pass on this one unless they absolutely need to complete their collection.

The game sells for $1.95, and Paine said he doesn’t even both buying them for less than $1 when they come in, because nobody ever buys it.

No. 2: Major League Baseball 2K7 (PSP)

I love everything about writing that title. It takes a very specific person not only to want a copy of Major League Baseball 2K7, but absolutely has to have it available on the go with their PSP.

This game sucks, and if you have a copy it’s worth $1.99. Paine has never sold a single copy of this game.

No. 3: Super Play Action Football (SNES)

Released in 1992, this was supposed to be the pre-eminent football experience until the release of the Madden series. It’s a good thing Madden came along, because this game was horrible in every conceivable way.

Writes Paine:

“It says the price is $3.19, but in three years I have never sold a copy. Any trades I get that includes it is automatically worth slightly less, as the stink of Super Play Action Football infects other games.”

No. 4: Sports Illustrated Golf Classic (GameBoy)

“It says $3.19 as well as the loose base price. Like Play Action Football this game is terrible. It somehow manages to be worse than Golf, and less charming too — because at least Golf had Mario in it ... sort of.”

No. 5: Lee Trevino’s Fighting Golf (NES)

There is no fighting in Lee Trevino’s Fighting Golf. It’s just a bad golf game and worth $5.

[altobrandy31-blog]

Art You Can Hold: This Bookbinder Shows Us Why Gorgeous Books Still Matter

It’s late on a cold Sunday afternoon, the November sky edging from deep blue to black, and Samuel Feinstein is getting ready to work.

A cup of milky coffee in hand, he putters about his Logan Square garden unit that doubles as his bookbinding workshop, inventorying a variety of obscure and Medieval-looking tools—bone folders, wood-handled awls, a 1,300-pound cast iron press—that have been slowly acquired over the years, mostly from retiring bookbinders.

In an era of Skype, Slack and high-priority emails, Feinstein’s work is slow, deliberate and exquisite. It is solitary, a bit monastic, even. And it hasn’t changed much in the past 500 years. It could be done by candlelight, if needed.

Feinstein’s path to a career in bookbinding has been long and, at times, painful. He was riding his bike to class one day as an undergrad at the University of Wisconsin-Madison when he was hit by a car and suffered a traumatic brain injury. Plagued by severe headaches that still bother him, he was forced to abandon his studies and began the search for something else to do with his life.

While looking up some Latin manuscripts that he had studied as a Classics major, he found the website for the North Bennet Street School, one of the nation’s leading schools for training in the trades and fine craftsmanship. And it just clicked for Feinstein, who realized he could continue to work with books but by using his hands instead of his head. He works as a private-practice bookbinder today in Logan Square, specializing in fine and design binding.

LoganSquarist interviewed Feinstein about the inside world of bookbinding, his favorite books that he’s worked on and how the digital age has affected the craft. The conversation has been edited and condensed. 

What was your training like to become a bookbinder?

The North Bennet Street School program started with Coptic bookbinding and Italian long stich, non-adhesive binding structures from the 1300’s to the 1500’s. Then you move onto case bindings, which is pretty much the way any hardcover book at a bookstore is bound. You learn how to fold sections and sew through the folds, different cover materials. A lot of the program is focused on producing bindings and then making more and more and more of them until you get good.

“Leaf of Faces” by Walt Whitman. Gold and blind tooling, leather onlays and an inset print in the front cover. Photo: Samuel Feinstein

What is it like to work as a bookbinder?

There are different career paths. Some people work at institutions as conservators and technicians. Others work as private-practice book binders, doing restorations and new bindings. Some do more artist books.

For me, I knew I wanted to do something that involved even just a tiny bit of working in leather and doing gold tooling. After I found out that bookbinding was a thing, I went to the Newberry Library every week or so so I could look at their collection and just kind of see what had been done, the structure and decoration. The same way an art student would go to an art museum and do sketches, that’s what I did with books—just going through their collection and seeing what had been done.

My favorite book there is a book of common prayer from 1642. It’s a small book, 8.5 inches by 5 inches or so, and it’s just covered in gold and different colored leather onlays. There are thousands of impressions on it. I went back and probably pulled that book 10 times. That book got me thinking… this would be really cool to work on.

“In the technological age we live in, there is a lot of beauty in making something with your hands.”

Samuel Feinstein in his workshop. Photo: Samuel Feinstein

What’s your practice like today?

I do fine bindings and design bindings… new bindings that are meant to be luxurious and take your breath away. I work with private collectors and dealers as well as some institutions. I did a binding for the Newberry Library for their Shakespeare exhibit and worked on a book from 1505 on French provincial law for the University of Iowa Law Library. [That particular book] didn’t open without cracking, it was really in a poor state. I took the board and spine off and I put a binding on it that would be consistent with 1505 France. So, wooden boards, calf skin leather. I did a design that was keeping with the time and antiqued it.

I also worked on a set of Blackstone’s Commentaries that had been rebound in this gross fake purple leather with faux marbled paper. Those bindings had no place on that four-volume set—you don’t want a bright, flashy binding on a book from 1700’s. So, I put in bindings that were more harmonious. But, in general, if a book is in the original binding and has a lot of bibliographic value to it, I won’t [alter] it. I’m not trying to erase the history of a book.

In general, if a book is in the original binding and has a lot of bibliographic value to it, I won’t [alter] it. I’m not trying to erase the history of a book.

What are the different techniques you use in fine binding?

There are paste papers and marbling and onlays and inlays, which introduce different leathers onto the binding. There are also leather dyes, and you can incise the leather and paint the incision with gold or acrylics in a number of different ways. Some people will cut out parts of the board and play with the way light comes through and the shadows that form on the board. Recently, some people are even experimenting with things like pop-up engineering and embedding LED lights.

“Duke Ellington Remembered.” Full-leather binding with edge-to-edge doublures and suede flyleaves, gold tooling, and onlays. Set atop a box that includes a compartment for the original binding. Photo: Samuel Feinstein.

What are some of your favorite books you have worked on?

I have a few favorites. One was a book of the poem “Into This World” by Natalie Goldberg, which had been printed and illustrated in a really gorgeous text with a color palette of soft blues and pale pinks. The binding I ended up doing used a nice light blue leather, then I added the phases of the moon from the back cover to the front cover, with some lines with waves and the waves being pulled up by the moon.

Another favorite was a book on 12 centuries of bookbinding, from 1200 to 1600. My binding was a commentary on the history of bookbinding. I did a very elaborate bone tool design on both covers. But on the front cover, there is a stark line where I went from blind tooling (which does not have any kind of leaf) to gold, to show the impact of gold tooling, which came into fashion around 1300.

“Into This Worl”d by Natalie Goldberg. Full-leather binding with gold tooling and onlays. Photo: Samuel Feinstein

What are you working on today?

One thing I am really excited that I’m starting on is a first printing of Thomas Paine’s Public Good, since he is kind of relevant in the political atmosphere these days. I’m also working on a collection of letters from John Quincy Adams and Andrew Jackson and have a binding coming up for a pretty significant artist book that was printed in the early 1900s, which will go on a travelling show with 15 other books.

What’s the most interesting or unusual book you have ever bound?

There was one book I worked on from the 1700s. The title was in Latin, but the translation was something along the lines of “The Medical Uses of Flogging.”

Do you ever get nervous working on a rare or historically important book?

I did do some tooling on a second folio of Shakespeare once, although someone else had done the binding. But not really. I know I have the hand skills to do it.

What’s the book binding community like?

It’s a fun and rowdy crew [laughs]. It’s a small community, we’re all a little odd in our own ways. A lot of us work alone and that’s a perk for most of us. There is a conference every year that about 150 people attend where we get to see each other. One of my friends from the North Bennet Street School, Marianna Brotherton, also practices here in Chicago.

“The Address of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II Delivered at Westminster Hall” on the Occasion of her Silver Jubilee. Full leather binding with doublures and flyleaves tooled in gold and palladium with leather onlays. Photo: Samuel Feinstein

What do you say about doing bookbinding in a world that is increasingly digital?

When it comes to custom hand-bound books, there has been more demand for them in recent years. There are quite a few avid collectors, people who have made their money elsewhere and really love holding and appreciating a finely bound book. It’s art but it’s different than a painting. You are handling it—you can open it, it’s more interactive. I love the experience and being part of it.

In the technological age we live in, there is a lot of beauty in making something with your hands. It’s tangible, it’s not ethereal. It’s kind of nice to be able to sit back and look and what you did, and say ‘I like that. I enjoyed making it. I can do it better next time.’

See Samuel’s portfolio and services here.

Featured photo: Samuel Feinstein

Source: https://logansquarist.com/2018/12/01/art-you-can-hold-this-bookbinder-shows-us-why-gorgeous-books-still-matter/

[trans-siberian-orchestra]

In Loving Memory of Paul O'Neill

Dear TSO Fans,

Paul O’Neill, who turned Trans-Siberian Orchestra into a source of beloved tradition and timeless stories, as well as a multimillion-dollar enterprise, passed away at the age of 60 after fighting chronic illness. Always wanting to lead from the front, he kept his health issues private.

Paul formed Trans-Siberian Orchestra in 1996 with a vision for a band that was conceptual, art-focused, and, like the world itself, intended to be ever-changing, as well as ever-lasting. In short, everything not expected of rock music at that point in time. At the time of his passing, he had achieved that dream, turning Trans-Siberian Orchestra into one of the most beloved touring acts of the new millennium, having played in excess of 1,800 shows for more than 14 million fans across the globe, with multiple platinum albums selling more than 10 million copies.

Born in Flushing, Queens, the second of 10 children of Harold and Veronica, Paul began playing guitar in middle school. His father, a World War II veteran, had a strong work ethic. He raised a family while studying for his doctorate in History and working full time at the famous Bell Laboratories.  Paul grew up in a home where learning and creativity were encouraged. He not only read voraciously from works of literature, history and philosophy, he learned the art of storytelling by listening to the tales told by his father and his Irish and Italian grandmothers. The lessons that he learned about history and humanity he would continue to draw upon for inspiration for his entire life.

After spending years playing in the growing New York City rock scene, he took a position at one of the large artist management companies, which launched the careers of bands like AC/DC and Aerosmith. He learned the recording and concert touring business from the ground up, giving him an insight into how to build a successful act worldwide. In the ‘80s, he became a major concert promoter in Japan for acts like Madonna and Sting, producing the first rock festivals in Japan. He was also adept in the recording studio, having produced Aerosmith’s Classics Live I and II albums, among many others.

Paul was attracted to his idea for a concept album at an early stage, citing The Who’s Tommy as an initial inspiration. As producer and co-writer with Savatage, he helped devise conceptual full-length works like Hall of the Mountain King, Gutter Ballet, Streets: A Rock Opera and Dead Winter Dead. In 1996, he created Trans-Siberian Orchestra as the perfect vehicle to express his art and visions for the future of entertainment.

Paul founded TSO to be not just an “idea” but an “ideal.” Taking inspiration from the great novelists, history and world heroes, he combined that with his own flair for storytelling to put together one of the most successful touring bands of a generation. While the production was a huge spectacular feat of engineering by itself, the show was always intended for everyone. He was a big proponent for keeping TSO’s shows affordable and always giving back to the community.

Paul put his heart and soul into making the impossible possible. Whether it was chartering a private plane for the band following a show in Buffalo to play before two million people at the Brandenburg Gate on New Year’s Eve, to performing a never-before-seen or done concert at the Wacken Open Air Festival across two stages with TSO taking up both of them, playing simultaneously.

By the mid-2000s, Trans-Siberian Orchestra’s seasonal tours found them perennially topping annual box office charts, both in the U.S. and worldwide, cementing the band’s legacy as a seasonal staple.

Two of Paul’s major influences were writers Charles Dickens and Oscar Wilde, the former for his own Christmas classics, the latter for the iambic pentameter he used for the narration in his shows (and the inspiration for his daughter’s name). Trans-Siberian Orchestra had several productions touring simultaneously, with him often jetting across America from one concert to the next.

Paul was also a dedicated philanthropist, with TSO having donated $14 million to charity, a writer (he penned a 50-page novella, Merry Christmas, Rabbi), and an avid student of history and collector of rare artifacts – including signed editions of Charles Dickens’ Christmas Books, Winston Churchill’s two-volume biography of his father, as well as letters from numerous dignitaries and Presidents, including one from Thomas Edison to his engineer detailing every stage of the invention of the phonograph, among many other significant antiquities. He loved to spend time with his fans; Paul would explain to everyone the love for his family, showing fans pictures from his home life, sometimes until the venue staff started to flick the lights and the arena was closing down. His charitable side knew no bounds. On more than one occasion, he literally would give the jacket off his back to a random homeless person who caught his eye, often with several hundred-dollar bills stuffed in the pocket.

Those who knew Paul were aware of his ongoing battles with his health and his propensity to overwork himself while in the midst of creative projects. From the solitary weeks in the hotel while working in his Florida studio to jumping around on a pyro-filled stage, or flying around the country on no sleep aggravating his chronic spine problems after early life back surgery. He would gladly do it for the music and for the fans. We fondly remember him jumping off an 8 foot stage at a New Year’s show in Berlin just to give a child the guitar he was playing at the time. While all witnessed Paul’s seemingly superhuman feats, but few witnessed afterward the physical toll these took on him.

Paul’s life mirrored one of his muses, Ludwig Von Beethoven. Just as with Ludwig, Paul’s hearing was a grave concern as he suffered for over a decade with a painful, debilitating, incurable case of Meniere’s disease. For Paul, this was a constant battle, causing him to race against time to write and record as much music as possible, before, like Beethoven, his ears ultimately betrayed him.

At the time of his death, Paul had two rock operas in various stages of completion, including Romanov: When Kings Must Whisper, about the 1917 Russian Revolution, and an expanded rewritten version of Gutter Ballet, both intended for Broadway.

He is survived by his wife, Desiree; his daughter, Ireland Wilde; his father, Harold and his nine brothers and sisters.

While we remain in shock and mourning for the passing of Paul O'Neill, we ask you, the entire TSO extended family, to consider going out of your way today to do something unusually kind or generous for someone less fortunate or for someone who could just use the help.

Paul often wrote about Angels coming to earth to inspire inexplicable kindness in a human life. Today, please consider doing your own selfless act of kindness.

We can't think of a better way to pay tribute to such a compassionate man.

- Trans-Siberian.com

[aion-rsa]

Garbage Pail Kids at 35: Don’t Leave Home Without It

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Presented by:

This story appears in the Den of Geek x eBay special edition trading card magazine. Op-ed by Brian Volk-Weiss, creator of The Toys That Made Us and The Movies That Made Us.

The beginning of my adventure with collecting cards was, as with so many things in my life, due to Star Wars. When I was very young I was enthralled by everything about a galaxy far, far away, but we didn’t have a lot of money for the toys. 

Even so, at the start of the Star Wars hysteria, there was a real dearth (to use a fancy word) of merchandise. Even if you could afford a Millennium Falcon, you might not be able to find one. But you could find the cards, and they were affordable. I’ll never forget those first ones I had, with the blue background and the little white dots. Then there were the green ones, and while for some inexplicable reason I don’t have distinct memories of The Empire Strikes Back cards being in my grubby hands, I was blown away when Return of the Jedi cards hit the shelves. Their vibrant red borders made them seem like they were all Time magazine covers! There was Jedi Luke looking at his hand, Luke talking with Princess Leia, and R2-D2 throwing off a shower of sparks when he got shot trying to break into the Endor bunker—those cards spoke to five-year-old me in a very profound way. Their impact can’t be overstated. 

We were living in a world where there were no DVD players, and even VCRs were still a little ways off. Collecting those cards enabled me to relive the movies in my head. I know it sounds like a cliché, but I really do remember sitting in bed, huddled under my blankets with a flashlight, going through a huge stack that my little hand could barely hold (no, that infamous C-3PO card with an apparently erect penis was not one of them!). I’d flip through the green ones, and the blue ones, and as I did the movies unspooled in my mind. They were magical, and they were precious to me. I still have some. 

The next step on my card collecting path began in the schoolyard at PS 144 when I was in the fourth grade. A bunch of my fellow students were hovering intently around something. I went over to get a look and discovered that they were focused on a bunch of cards. My interest immediately waned. Never a sports fan, as I got older I associated cards with baseball and football and all the games that had never managed to hold my attention. In my mind, my beloved Star Wars cards were the exception to the dullness of cards as a rule. 

But as I got closer I saw that these were different. They were brightly colored and depicted what, in my estimation, appeared to be crazy cartoon characters. This was my introduction to Garbage Pail Kids. And like every other kid my age at the time I got very excited and immediately informed my mother that we needed to start buying Garbage Pail Kids cards in bulk! 

Such cards were often referred to as “trading cards” but that term really didn’t apply to my Star Wars collection. My friends and I collected them, but we never actually traded them. Garbage Pail Kids were different—we did actually trade them. I vividly remember, despite the fact that it’s been 35 years, giving up something in the range of a dozen cards in exchange for a Nasty Nick card, designated 1A. Now to put that in perspective, when this card was offered to me in a trade my reaction was the same as it would be if someone entered my office now and offered me a trade for the actual Mona Lisa—a Nasty Nick 1A was serious business. 

A quick aside: I always found it funny that Garbage Pail Kids had cards designated 1A and 1B— each featured the same artwork, but carried a different name. They were obviously trying to have twice as many cards for the same amount of artwork. From a business standpoint, you can’t argue with that logic. From a collector’s point of view, as well as a little boy’s, the double designation was really cool because it meant you had the chance to collect 200 cards instead of 100—it made the hunt that much more exciting. 

Today, my involvement with trading cards continues. I am in the fortunate position of partnering with my frequent collaborators Brian Stillman and Kelley Slagle on a new documentary titled Igniting the Spark: The Story Of Magic: The Gathering. At the start of the process I knew next to nothing about the topic, but Brian Stillman kindly introduced me to its intricacies and now I am spellbound (pun intended!). 

Despite never being good at them, I’ve always been intrigued by mathematics, so I have become enthralled by Richard Garfield, the creator of Magic: The Gathering. He first envisioned the game back in 1991 while he was a doctoral candidate in combinatorial mathematics. The documentary will be a deep dive into the history of Magic: The Gathering. As anyone who has seen The Toys That Made Us and The Movies That Made Us knows, I am extremely interested in the human stories behind all of these cultural phenomena. 

Magic: The Gathering’s story is an amazing one—what literally began with homemade cards became the most profitable game on the market, ultimately becoming so successful that it even wound up purchasing its precursor, Dungeons & Dragons (apologies to all the Owlbear fans out there!). Being a part of this project has been a pleasure, and learning how Richard Garfield’s initial idea has blossomed into a multi-billion dollar industry has been an amazing journey. 

Being a small part of Igniting the Spark: The Story Of Magic: The Gathering makes me feel like I have come full circle. What started off as an obsession for Star Wars cards and transitioned into an infatuation with Garbage Pail Kids—I still have my Nasty Nick and my disgusting, despite its good name, Brainy Brian (I don’t have, or want, the really bonkers Fryin’ Brian)—has culminated in this documentary about the most successful card game of all time. They say you shouldn’t make predictions, but I’ll go out on a limb here—just writing this foreword has renewed my interest in cards so much that my wallet will soon be feeling some pain.

I can’t wait.

The post Garbage Pail Kids at 35: Don’t Leave Home Without It appeared first on Den of Geek.

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