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lemonjoonah · 3 years

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Wrapped Together (M)

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader Word Count: 18K Rating: M Genre: Christmas AU, Romance, Drama Warnings: Protected sex, oral (m. rec.), referenced illness/death of parent, swearing, classism. Summary: Despite your best efforts to keep your head down, to self-preserve and endure what will no doubt be the worst Christmas of your life, you are still roped into volunteering for the hospital's annual gift wrap fundraiser. The enticing factor that lured you out? The promise of a new shift partner, Kim Namjoon. Though your first day together starts off with a slight miscalculation of his skills for wrapping, he soon becomes your essential ally in the fight to get through this lonely holiday season.

| Secret Santa Collab | My Masterlist |

A/N: A big thank you to @kimtaehyunq for asking me to join her Secret Santa Christmas Collab, this was my first collab ever and I absolutely loved it. And of course to my beta readers @m00nchild-shi and @ladyartemesia thank you for helping me gain the courage to post this. I hope that this fic is able to bring a bit of comfort to those celebrating the holidays a little differently this year, so please enjoy!

...

-5 Weeks Until Christmas-

Amidst the chatter of the office, a dull rumble reaches your ears and vibrates the desk beneath your fingers, waking you from the repetitive haze of your hundredth call report. The moment of confusion switches to frantic action when your brain finally catches on and recognizes it as your own personal phone. Scurrying through your purse, you nab it just in time, but after checking the caller ID you desperately wish you hadn’t.

You knew this call was coming, you’ve dreaded it since you felt the first freezing snowflake on the tip of your nose, when you heard the first carol blaring over the radio, and saw the first tacky inflatable gracing a lawn on your street. It happens every year, like clockwork, though this will be the first time she’ll be enlisting one and not two. Unable to put off the dreaded moment any longer, you answer, accepting that if you rip the band-aid off now and decline her invitation to join the wrapping fundraiser, it’ll be one less uncomfortable moment later.

“Aunt Emma, hey it’s been awhile.” She’s not exactly your aunt, but you’ve known her ever since you and your mother settled down here ten years ago. With little other family nearby she was one of the few you and your mom could always count on. Making your task to turn her down all the more difficult now.

“My dear, how are you holding up? I’m so sorry to do this but I'm calling with some rather unfortunate news.”

“Oh?” You exclaim, careful not to sound too hopeful that you might be free of your heavy burden.

“Yes, well it’s regarding the wrapping fundraiser. I wanted to put you on the same shifts as myself or Maria. I didn’t want to have you alone, since, well, you know... but there are so many rookie volunteers this year. And with you being part of the organization for so long, I was hoping you work with one of them instead for the evening shifts? It’ll just be you and him, do you think you could manage it?”

“I-I uh...” Now this is something you had not expected. You spent the past few weeks worrying about how you might have to work side by side with pitying glances, condolences, and referenced scripture from the usual staff. Any thoughts and prayers for your loss would likely turn you into a pool of tears. Not something you want to happen in public, or private for that matter, but if you are partnered with a newcomer, one who knows nothing of your past, maybe... maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. “I can do that.”

“I knew you could! I’ll put you down for the weekday evenings from the seventh up to Christmas. You’re off work at four, right? I’ll send you more details later, but do you want me to be there to introduce you to the other volunteer?”

“No!” You blurt out, insisting in a volume far louder than necessary, but you can’t risk her acting on the offer. Introductions when done by Emma are dicey at best, with one solid breath she has the capacity to share every bit of your sad history, leaving you exactly where you’d rather not be. “I’m sure we’ll be fine. No need to put yourself out like that, you can just tell me their name now and save yourself the trip.”

“Thank you dear, always so considerate. One second let me just grab that for you...” She pauses on the phone line, as you look around your office in worry, not wanting to get in trouble for taking a personal call on the clock. “Ah here it is. You’ll be working with Kim Namjoon...”

...

-Less than 3 Weeks Until Christmas-

After finishing work you head off to the mall for your first day on wrapping duty. It should be a relatively quiet night, since the majority of the crowd typically disperses at this time, heading home to be with families for dinner. Your own sits in a paper bag on the passenger seat of your car. A solitary meal as you battle the rush hour traffic. Finishing off the last of the salted fries with a lick of your fingers while you secure a parking spot.

Flipping down your visor you scoff when confronted with your appearance, your makeup melted off thanks to the struggles of your earlier shift. You dab and blend a fresh blot of concealer on the dark bags beneath your eyes, determined to erase any evidence of your doleful days and sleepless nights.

The rented store space is already set up, with a long table propped up right at the entrance. Dressed with a variety of paper and ribbon and looking particularly festive. The other volunteers give you a brief greeting and run down before they leave and pass the duties off to you. With them gone you take a seat, looking down at the selection you have to offer this year, trying with all your might not to focus on the empty chair beside you, one that is usually fill by your-

“Hi, sorry I’m late...” Your gaze flicks up from the table, startled to find a giant of a man. Greeting you with a smile warm enough to melt your frozen expression.

“H-hi,” You stutter out, staring at his handsome face framed with light brown locks, feeling as though you’ve seen it before, but can’t quite place where. “You must be Namjoon?” You ask, running through the list of actors and singers in your mind but coming up empty on who he reminds you of.

He nods, before confirming your name too, and launching into the reason behind his tardiness. “The traffic was not in my favour today.” He gestures to the table and the vacant seat behind it. “May I?”

“Of course.” You quickly scoot the folding table over so he can slip by the barrier that separates you from the mall. He takes off his coat to reveal a whole suit beneath, though he soon disposes of the jacket and tie too. You try not to gulp as he rolls up his sleeves in front of you, his arms flexing as they reveal themselves.

“Pretty quiet?” He asks looking around the mall.

“It usually is around now, give it an hour or two.”

“Have you been doing this long?”

“A few years...” You mumble, not wanting to dive too deep in that well, you quickly turn to pin the question on him instead. “What prompted you to volunteer? Did Emma enlist you during her recruiting effort?”

“She did, I found her posting the flyer at my workplace.” Namjoon chuckles. “But I’ve seen you all set up here before, and since my usual Christmas plans with my family have changed, I thought I’d join you all instead.”

“Oh, so you’re not spending Christmas with them?”

“No, they’ve gone to visit my sister and her family in her city this year. I unfortunately have a few work commitments I can’t get out of to make the trip in time, but rather than just mope about at home I thought I might be of some use.” Namjoon smiles again, his fingers folding the corner of the wrapping paper in front of him. “What about you, any plans?”

“No, I usually spend it with my mom, but she won’t be with me this year...” Or any year going forward, you consider while you give him a weak smile. She was the very reason you joined this organization all those years ago, when Aunt Emma was making her rounds and signing up everyone she could at the hospital, you and your mother were there for an appointment, your mom offered up both of your services lending you to a tradition that would extend for years through her treatment, remission, and the final return.

“So we're in the same boat?”

“I guess so.” His grin is so contagious, despite the differences in your situation you can’t help but agree.

Your first client of the evening comes forward and drops a small pile of kids toys in front of you both . “Thank god you're here. If I bring these home unwrapped my kids won’t hesitate to spoil the surprise.” You divide the presents between you and Namjoon while the mother keeps talking and flicking through the different styles of paper offered. “At least if they’re wrapped I can say I saw Santa at the mall and he gave me these early. They are so hard to fool these days.”

“I take it you’ll want the Santa stickers?” You ask pointing to a closed box behind you, hidden away from the wide and prying eyes of young children passing by.

“Yes, thank you so much!”

“No problem.” You assure her while putting the last piece of tape on the stack of video games. Though when you look over to check on Namjoon you find that he has barely even started. He cut off a sheet entirely too big and is attempting to fold it around the boxed animatronic pet. Your eyes stare at the state of the poor paper unable to look away from the crumpled carnage. But the shock soon turns to amusement over his determination to salvage the mangled sheet, and you find yourself biting your lip in an attempt not to laugh. Luckily the woman in front of you hasn’t noticed but once you're finished with yours, you reach over for the assist.

“Here, I can take over that one. Could you do the ribbon for me?”

Namjoon nods opening his mouth in an embarrassed grin. He does manage to secure the strand around the package but loses the spool before he can cut it. The red ribbon rolls all the way to your foot, before you stop it with a tap on the sole of your boot. Namjoon winces, while you let out a chuckle before bending over to hand it back to him, and finish wrapping the other present.

The attempt at a ribbon curl unfortunately goes the same as the package before it, with him completely at a loss and using the wrong edge of the scissor blade. Trying to save him you make another suggestion. “If you want you can always use the premade sticker curls.”

Namjoon nods and places them on the two packages along with the vibrant sticker of a cartoon Claus winking as he delivers the warning, ‘Do not open ‘till Christmas, Santa’s watching.’

As you load up the presents into a bag, Namjoon takes to the cashbox, looking expectantly from the client with his dashingly dimpled grin.

“Oh right.” She comments with an awkward smile. Opening her Gucci bag and matching wallet, the corners of her lips turning down when she rifles through several triple digit bills unable to find any smaller denomination.

The stand is by donation only, but the implication has always been that one should compensate the fundraiser for the service provided. You can usually tell when someone intends to leave no payment at all, and unfortunately you know this act all too well. She’ll apologize and say that she has to run to the bank and get some cash, but you’ll never see her again. Namjoon, unfamiliar with this ploy, continues to give his eager smile, and to your utter shock she submits, handing him a hundred dollar bill.

Namjoon thanks her profusely as she melts too under his gaze muttering, “Not a problem.” Before walking off clutching her now wrapped gifts.

You look to Namjoon in disbelief while he locks the money away in the cash box. Only breaking the silence when the client is fully out of earshot. “How the hell did you do that?!”

“Do what?” He raises an eyebrow completely oblivious to what he just achieved.

“She... she... you got her to donate, and such a large amount. How?”

“What do you mean how? People give that much all the time don’t they?”

“No, they don’t!”

“Oh...” He gives you another of his knee weakening smiles. “Sorry I assumed, I guess I’m just used to it.” He scratches at the back of his neck looking down at the table.

“Used to it? Where on earth do you see, do you get used to, that kind of generosity?”

“Through my job I suppose?” His grin turns to a look of embarrassment. “I work in art procurement, currently under contract with the museum. I seek out collectors and convince them to donate or loan out their assets.”

It would seem that getting people to open up their wallets is practically his profession. “Well... looks like manning the cash will be the perfect job for you.” That smile of his is a dangerous weapon, and one you would be remiss not to use in the fundraiser’s efforts. Though it still leaves one question unanswered. “But I have to ask...” Your previously concealed giggling comes to the surface. “Why on earth would you volunteer for a holiday wrapping station if you don’t know how to wrap?”

A blush reaches his cheeks. “Last year when I was here... I left with far more than I was expecting, and feeling as though I should have given more. So I figured if I couldn’t be with my own family, I wanted to do this instead.” He starts habitually folding a paper scrap. “And maybe I’d learn a useful skill-”

When a streak of red is left on the paper trailing behind his finger you jump to interrupt. “Is that...”

“Fuck.” He mutters pulling his index close to examine it. “Yeah, those scissors are sharp, didn’t realize I drew blood though.”

You immediately start rummaging around in your bag. “I know I have a couple in here, one second.” You pull out a small box of bandages and peel apart the papers to reveal the adhesive.

“You carry band-aids in your purse?” Namjoon asks, with a raised brow.

“You're the one who cut their finger trying to make a ribbon curl.”

“It wasn’t a criticism, sorry I just thought it was... nice.” He holds up the injury and you're careful to wrap the strip around it.

“Yes well,” Your face heats up as you catch yourself lingering. “Try to stay away from the scissors unless absolutely necessary. I’d rather not have to make a trip to the hospital.”

“That would be counter productive wouldn’t it?” Namjoon laughs outright.

...

Despite you being the only one to wrap you both manage the evening surprisingly well, pulling in a record donation amount.

“You must be good at your job,” you mutter with a smirk, as you finish counting the lockbox. “I’ve never seen people so happy to part with their money.”

“I only showed them how good of a job you did,” Namjoon explains. “I’ve never seen someone put so much care into wrapping.”

“First impressions for a gift can be important too.” You justify as you secure the cash in a deposit bag. “They put a lot of care into selecting the gift, why shouldn’t I exemplify that?”

“Even the gift cards?”

“Especially the gift cards. I have to make them memorable somehow don’t I?”

“True.” Namjoon concedes, with a small frown. “Listen I’m sorry if I didn’t make a good first impression on you myself. If you want I can call Emma and we will find someone else to help you.”

“No, I enjoyed working with you. It just caught me off guard that you didn’t actually know how to wrap. If you get bored of handling the cash I could try and teach you if you’d like... you said you wanted to learn right?”

“You’d be willing to show me?”

“Definitely, though let's stick to the premade ribbon curls. I’d rather not have to use anymore band-aids if I can avoid it.”

After pulling down the gate and locking up the station up behind. Namjoon accompanies you to the bank to drop off the deposit before you part ways for the evening, with you going out one exit and him another.

The sudden blast of cold air forces you to huddle in your coat, and crank the heat the very second you step into your car. As the windows to thaw and frost retreats, you spot your tall wrapping partner waiting at the bus stop.

“Now why would he...” You’re left perplexed judging from the description of his job and quality of his attire you assumed him to drive some sort of flashy car, never would you think he would take public transportation.

You drive over and stop right in front of Namjoon, rolling down the window. “Where do you live?”

“The Swan Estates, but if you don’t leave near there that’s fine I don’t mind bussing home.” Namjoon looks down the road. “It should be here soon.”

“It’s no problem, I pass by that area on my way home.” You reach across the car for the handle opening the door. “Come on get in. It’s too cold to wait for a bus.”

Namjoon nods, and eagerly hops into the car holding his hands close to his vents with a sigh. “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. I didn’t think to ask, I just assumed-”

“That I could drive?”

You nod giving him a sheepish grin this time.

“As you saw earlier I’m rather accident prone. I think it’s safer for everyone if I leave the driving to others.” He chuckles looking out the window. “What about you? When not rescuing people from cold transit stops or wrapping disasters, what do you daylight as.”

You grimace at the question knowing your answer is nowhere near as impressive as his. “I’m a phone-rep for Interlude Shipping, I work in their tracking department.”

His reaction is not the usual glazed expression you get when you reveal that you work in a call centre, but a look of awe. “You must be so busy this time of year, how do you have energy for volunteering too?”

“I’m used to it.”

“Do you like it there?”

“It’s... a paycheck. I needed a full time position with benefits right out of school and that was what was available. I would have preferred something else but...” You stop yourself, scolding how much you almost revealed. Finding it far too easy to talk to Namjoon. He doesn’t pester you to continue but lets your abrupt end linger in the silence until he points out his house within the estate. “So I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Namjoon nods in agreement with his dimples on full display. “Looking forward to it. Thanks again for the ride.”

After he leaves your car another nervous giggle you’ve been holding in finally escapes you. Three weeks working with this kind, considerate and downright gorgeous man. Though there’s no ring on his finger, he has to be attached to someone. Men like him don’t walk around single for long. Your shoulders fall at the thought, despite the fact that you have no intention of forming an attachment at this time... it’s still too soon.

Before you even pull out of Namjoon’s driveway, your phone vibrates from the cup holder you stashed it in. Aunt Emma’s name popping up on the display. You press the green button to accept and put her on speaker while you pull out onto the road.

“Hello my dear, just checking in to see how the first night went?”

“Good, no great actually. I think you’ll be happy with the result.”

“And your partner? Everything working well with him?”

“Yeah,” You confirm looking up in the rearview mirror taking one last look at Namjoon’s house. “He’s really nice, we already have a system in place so I think we’ll work well together.”

“That’s wonderful to hear. I was worried at first, wondered if I had made the right decision-”

“You did!” You encourage her, not wanting her to change her mind, and make another switch.

“Great, so we’ll carry on as is then. I’ll message Maria to let her know, I think she’s still on shift at the hospital though...” Aunt Emma mutters to herself. “Speaking of which I had to stop by there today and guess who was asking about you?”

You freeze in the front seat of your car, unable to say his name, but that doesn’t stop your chatty Aunt from continuing on despite your silence.

“That Jackson, such a nice young man, it’s a pity you-”

“Aunt Emma, I’m so sorry but I should go. ” You cut her off unwilling to listen to her disappointment over your own personal matter. “It’s getting late and I have work in the morning.”

“Oh of course, no problem dear. Call me if you need anything.”

When you arrive at your cold and empty apartment. The silence greets you with the usual punch to your gut, just as it has for the past eight months. She should be there to say hello and ask you about your day, just as she always had. But all that’s there to welcome you is the stack of dusty Christmas decor boxes thrown in the corner of the living room. Unwilling to spend another minute alone you sulk off to bed, ready to put another day behind and start the next. But for the first time in a while, you are actually looking forward to a fraction of the never ending cycle.

...

Whoever said Christmas time is the most wonderful time of year, clearly never worked a customer service job. They’ve never been yelled at for four hours straight, gone to lunch, and then endured another four. With a couple weeks still left until the looming deadline of Christmas you can only imagine what you’ll have to listen to in the coming days. The woes of a parent trying to track down their child's number one gift... it’s enough to send chills down your spine. Just once you’d like to find someone happy on the other end of the line, someone who didn’t need something from you, someone who called just to say hi, and indulge you with a friendly chat.

With the last call of the day done you throw on your coat, and bolt out of the office before anyone else. Elated by the fact that you have somewhere else to be, happy that someone else is expecting you. Namjoon beats you to the station today, chatting with the other volunteers as they leave. One of them pats you on the arm and delivers a sad smile, you seize with fear and the worry that they had discussed you, but when you find Namjoon beaming without a hint of concern the weight lifts and you can once again forget your loss for now.

“Hey, how was work?” He asks.

“Good... good.” You cover with a smile not wanting to drag him down. He doesn’t look convinced his eyes narrow and the corner of his lip twitches, but you reciprocate before he can confirm. “How about your day?”

“Quiet, I’ve spent the past few months alongside the curators putting together an exhibit and with it finally finished all that’s left is to wait until it’s over.”

“So you had to stay here for Christmas only to wait for it to end? That’s too bad.”

“There are a couple other tasks I have to attend, an auction, and an event for the patrons, but the tear down on the 24th is pretty important, some of the lenders will want their pieces back in time for Christmas.”

“That’s such a miserable deadline for so much work. Why would they ask you to give up your Christmas Eve to do that? Surely it can be done after the holiday can't it?”

“Not this one, it’s ‘The Gift of Christmas’ Past’ exhibit,” Namjoon explains. “Many people were good enough to donate their family heirlooms for the majority of the season, but come the actual holiday, it’s time for them to return home.”

You just about fall off your chair in awe. You’ve seen that exhibit advertised everywhere, even been tempted to go yourself, but the thought of going alone has prevented your attendance. “I had no idea, that’s such a popular exhibit, you worked on that?”

“I did, I even helped come up with the idea for it.” Namjoon beams, with a small amount of red rises to the surface of his cheeks. “The curators at the museum have been more than accommodating. I never thought I’d get the chance to step into their roll myself. I was lucky to be given the chance, so you can understand why I had to stay and help them once it’s finished. Of course it’s given me some other opportunities I would never have had in the past too, like the ability to help you here.”

You nod still looking at him in admiration, while in your mind a further divide falls between you. As friendly as he is to you, it’s obvious that he’s way out of your league. Even if you wanted to pursue something more with him, someone of his status... really it’s a wonder he even looks in your direction, let alone chose to volunteer at this tiny holiday wrapping station.

Your conversation is interrupted by a mall goer with a bag of gifts. Namjoon helps as best he can, supplying you with tape as he learns over your shoulder. Loaning you his finger to help you knot the ribbon around the gifts. With a sizeable donation left in Namjoon’s care you are both left alone at the table again.

Between clients you do your best to show him how to wrap the small boxes and ready cut paper at your disposal. Though his folding has improved, his use of tape can be considered... excessive. “You shouldn’t need more than three pieces on a present like this.” You chuckle as you catch his hand before it can apply the seventh piece of tape.

“But your packaging looks so durable compared to mine. How is it supposed to hold together if not for more tape.”

“Years of practice with tighter folds and better adhesive placement.” You analyze his work. “You might be an up and coming art curator but wrapping is my craft.”

Namjoon laughs and grabs a fresh sheet along with the scissors.

“Should I go fetch my band-aids?” You ask, gazing at the sharp implement with trepidation.

“No I’ve got this, I’m ready to earn my redemption.” Namjoon folds the paper several times before cutting a rounded edge. “Wrapping might not be my forte, but this I mastered long ago.” He opens up the paper grinning madly as he reveals a perfect snowflake.

You giggle at the innocence of the piece in question. “That is quite impressive, when did you become such a proficient?”

“I’d say I peaked at eight. One evening when it was just my sister and I, we covered my whole house with them. Every surface, every window, plastered with paper snow. Though my parents were less than enthused I like to think of it as my first full art show.”

“What on earth possessed you to do it?” You ask, trying to imagine the look on his parents as they returned home to the indoor flurry.

Namjoon looks up with a heavy expression, for such a lighthearted story why does he look so wary to tell you “A mutual fri-”

But as chance would have it he is once again interrupted by another coming to your station. When the post dinner rush hits you hardly get another chance to chat.

...

-2 Weeks Until Christmas-

The week passes in much the same way as the past two days, but with each evening session Namjoon is able to improve upon his wrapping skills a little more. To the point where you are comfortable to leave him alone for a few minutes to man the station.

“You’re sure it’s all right if I just run to the washroom for a minute?”

“I’ll be fine.”

“I could put up the be back in five minutes sign if you-”

“Go, I can hold down the fort... just leave the band-aids.” You are ready to let out a big sigh when Namjoon holds up his hands in defeat. “Just kidding, I promise, now go.”

You hurry off as fast as you can swearing when you find a line up. By the time that you are finally able to return you find Namjoon finishing up with an attractive woman and her single gift. You smile at her as you join him behind the table, she pauses, caught off guard for a moment but then hands him the donation along with a slip of paper.

Namjoon opens it as she walks off. Blushing profusely before throwing it in the trash along with the wrapping scraps.

“What was that about?”

“Nothing... she just must have gotten the wrong impression.”

“Did she give you her phone number?”

Namjoon nods looking down with guilt.

“And you're not going to keep it? She was gorgeous.”

“What? No, of course not.”

“Right, I assume that wouldn’t go over well with your girlfriend.” You speculate, seeking to figure out his status once and for all.

“No girlfriend.” Namjoon mutters.

“Boyfriend?”

“No boyfriend either.” Namjoon smiles. “I just wasn’t looking to get her number.”

You look at him in disbelief. If she wasn’t good enough, there’s no way in hell you could ever dream of being with him.

...

The drive home in the evening is rather quiet. Namjoon’s fingers drag across his lips as if in deep compilation.

“Any big plans for your couple days of freedom?” With Aunt Emma’s team working the weekend that gives both you and Namjoon some time off, but unfortunately apart.

“What? Oh yes, I suppose.” He answers as though you dragged him from a stupor. “I have an auction to go to tomorrow for work.”

“Buying art for the museum are you?”

“Not exactly in the market to buy. But if you're not busy you should come along, I would love some company.”

“Not because you would love a drive?”

“No, not at all, I was planning on booking a car tonight. I could come pick you up on the way.”

You shake your head. “No, if we’re going together I’ll drive. No need to waste your money on something like that. What time should I pick you up?”

“I’ll have to double check and get back to you but likely late in the morning?” You nod in agreement as he pulls out his phone. “What’s your number?”

You give it to him and your cell vibrates in your pocket as he sends off a text a second later, leaving you with his own.

“So I guess I will see you tomorrow now then.”

“It’s a date.” Namjoon smiles as he gets out and leaves you in the car.

You snort in disbelief, staring after him while he runs off to the front door of his house. No, there’s no way, he can’t be serious, it’s not a date, date. The phone vibrates again, reminding you of the unread message he sent, prompting you to look at it before you drive off home.

This was the only phone number I actually wanted. See you tomorrow, - Namjoon

...

You lie in bed caught between denial and anticipation for what’s to come in the next day. Every moment that excitement bubbles up inside, you are forced to push it down with the weight of scepticism. Namjoon was looking to distract from his lonely Christmas, you are just the band-aid to his superficial wound, but would that be so bad? Haven’t you been using him the past week in the same manner, a mode of distraction? The only difference is the depths of your injuries. While his might be a simple cut repaired by time, yours is a laceration straight to the heart, damage that will soon bleed through a flimsy bandage, but at least you can hide it for now, you can conceal the extent of your misery and enjoy the comfort that is him for the holiday. Ripping that band-aid off won’t hurt, not compared to the damage that has already been done.

You look back at your phone smiling at his message, confirming that this is what you want for now, when to your surprise another comes in.

KNJ: Are you awake?

You double check the time, 12:23 a little late for a friendly chat isn’t it?

YN: Yeah, everything okay?

KNJ: That depends, what are your thoughts on Hallmark Christmas movies?

You pause in confusion, questioning his motives for such an odd query. Coming up dry you can give him the most truthful answer you can.

YN: They’re chestnuts.

KNJ: Chestnuts? 🤔

YN: Palatable only when thoroughly roasted. 🔥🔥🔥

Your phone starts ringing a second later, the caller Namjoon. You pick it up to hear him laughing on the other end. “I’ll have to remember that. You up for burning a film? I could use another open fire, there’s a pretty horrible one on their channel right now.”

“I’m sure I could spark an ember of criticism. How bad are we talking?”

“There’s a made up country, a town that looks like it exists solely for the purpose of celebrating Christmas-”

“And let me guess, a prince?”

“You know it?”

“Nope, just following the trend of tropes.” You grab your earbuds and venture out to the living room wrapped in your blanket, a beverage in hand, and ready to turn on your own TV. With one bud lodge in your ear to listen to Namjoon the other is free to take in the cringeworthy dialogue. “My god why were you watching this?”

“Couldn’t sleep, and I thought this would also help put me in the Christmas spirit, but I can’t stop laughing at how bad it is.” Namjoon chuckles deeply as the heroine stumbles over a mere pebble and falls into the hero’s arm.

“I don’t think you have any right to laugh at that part.” You join him in laughter. “You two appear to have some similarities.”

“Wait, so does this make me the clumsy lead and you the dashingly perfect love interest?”

“Oh most definitely, I’ll be saving your Christmas.”

“I suppose you are pretty perfect.”

You’re thankful that Namjoon isn’t there to see your response, silently choking on your glass of water, followed by spilling your sip all down your shirt, further emphasising your next point. “I’m not perfect.”

“Well you should let me see that side sometime, or I will continue to feel like this poor woman who is confronted with someone way out of their league.”

Namjoon thinks that you're out of his league? “No, I’m sorry but in order for me to save your Christmas based on this movie I have to play the perfect hero.” Of course the leading lady swoons in her prince's arms. “I just wish the characters had more depth, I’ve read kids books with a wider emotional range.”

“Me too. And the timing,” Namjoon scoffs. “It’s always so perfect. They always meet at the perfect moment and latch on immediately only to have everything work out in their favour, and it all claims to be a Christmas miracle, it doesn’t work like that.”

“That sounds like someone’s been scorned before on Christmas.”

“Not scorned no. More like a missed opportunity, one that I’ve regretted for a long while.”

“Anything I can help with?” You ask. “As the supporting lead that is my mission is it not?”

“Maybe, I’ll have to think about it. Unfortunately my dilemma isn’t so easy to solve.”

“I don’t think anyone's dilemma’s are ever as easy or clear cut as theirs.” You yawn as you lay down on the couch and watch the pitiful drama unfold. “Their world is perfect and always has their back through some sort of mystical power or being.”

“I think people in the real world call that god...” Namjoon chuckles.

“Yeah well, our god is a shitty writer if this is what their creations come to expect.” You murmur, stifling a yawn.

“Is that a crack in your shining armour I spy?”

“No, just commentary.” Though your own internal defences are askew, and the longer you watch the more you understand why. It’s jealousy, jealousy of how quickly they overcome any tragedy, and how they do so with a picture perfect life, as if the creators left all the negative emotions, the realistic impacts of trauma, on the cutting room floor. If only you were that perfect love interest that Namjoon wanted you to be... maybe you can keep the facade until the end of the holidays, at least one of you can have a better Christmas for it.

All you have to do is continue ignoring the most painful parts, a practice you are well versed in considering the boxes still looming in the shadowy corner, still unmoved after all this time. You know nothing good will come from unpacking them, there is no comfort inside, the only thing that could help is long gone, the story which your mother used to read to you every Christmas before you moved here. You’ve hunted through those boxes so many times while she was still here with you, but now that she’s gone you don’t even have the desire to look, nor the strength to store them away.

...

You wake hours later with a loud crumpling sound in your right ear. Your bud still in place, and your call time continues to count past the 7 hour mark. “Namjoon, are you there?” You inquire with a groggy yawn.

“Fuck... yeah, did I wake you?”

“It’s fine, sorry I fell asleep.”

“Don’t worry I did too. But unfortunately I seem to have lost an airpod at some point in the night.” The rustling continues as he chats to you. “I refuse to lose another to this couch, it’s taken so many from me already, you’ think I would have learned by now.”

“Oh, then this is a regular occurrence for you? Chatting up women until you fall asleep,” you scoff.

“No! God no, I just usually fall asleep listening to music and then my cushions eat them when I lower my defences.”

“I leave you to battle it out with your sofa, but what time should I pick you up?”

“Eleven okay with you?”

You double check the clock, ensuring you have enough time for a shower and to look presentable. “Yeah that works. I’ll see you then.”

...

You pull into the packed parking lot of a large warehouse. With Namjoon looking dapper in a blazer and peacoat. You yourself are glad to have chosen to dress a bit classier than your usual garb for a Saturday afternoon. When he said it was for work you couldn’t risk dressing down.

But there is still an air of confusion about your reason for being here. If he’s not attending to buy something for the museum or a client, why is his presence required? The items up for auction are not exactly what you expected, with the majority of it being furniture and woven rugs. You tilt your head in confusion as Namjoon eyes up an old wooden desk.

“Sorry,” He mutters, seeing you as he comes to from his distracted state. “I have a personal weakness for such items.”

“Don’t be, but is that why we're here?”

“No, although it is tempting.” He nods over to a collection of old black and white sketches on the wall across from you, graphite scenes of the city from long ago judging by subject matter and the yellowing of the paper behind the frame. “They’re the real reason we’re here. When I heard of this estate sale I knew that some of those works would likely come to market. I’m here to find out who buys them, and hopefully see if we can secure a possible loan for the museum in the future.”

“So how do you do it? How do you convince them to part with such pieces other than that dangerous smile of yours?”

Namjoon humours you, flashing his most coveted weapon. “Many of the artworks found at estate sales like this, they’ve fallen into disrepair. They often haven’t been cared for, likely kept in some musty room where the humidity damages them. The museum has a team of top rated and highly respected conservators who would be able to properly preserve it and slow any further deterioration, and in exchange for their services we ask for a short term loan of the art.

“A win-win.”

“I like to think so, but some people are rather protective of their investment. It can be a tricky negotiation which I have been on both sides of when I worked for the private sector.”

“Which do you prefer more?”

“Definitely the public. The museum doesn’t pay as much, but the audience and notoriety far greater. I really hope that I can continue my work with them once my initial contract ends.”

“I assume securing this for them will help in that goal?” You nod to the pieces, admiring the sought after collection.

“One can only hope. Who knows, maybe I’ll get my Christmas miracle like the movies promised.” He jokes, putting his hand on your shoulder and leading you on.

While you and Namjoon continue to look around at the lots up for bidding, he proceeds to fawn over the wooden art and furniture, taking pictures and looking up the makers.

You can’t help but enjoy his interest, watching his eyes go wide and his mouth gasp when he’s found something which intrigues him. “Have you ever purchased something for yourself at one of these?”

“A few things, tables, chairs, and books too. It’s a great place to find unique pieces, or things lost to the past.” He gives you a shy smile. “Is there anything you’d like to look for?”

A possible item springs to the forefront of your mind. “Do they have any books here now?”

Namjoon grins at your request and leads you over to several crates filled to the brim with books. All the copies inside look to be older editions of epic novels, nothing like what you hope to find. Your heart sinks as you let out a sigh of disappointment.

“Can I help?”

“Nah, I think I’m out of luck. I was looking for a kid’s picture book. I briefly met someone at the wrapping station who found a copy second hand, must have been at a sale like this. I was hoping I would have the same success, but that seems like a bit of a far reach.” Had it not been their gift to someone else you would have made them an offer for it or even gotten their name at the very least, but you were so distracted at the time... all you can see and remember to this day was the book in front of you.

“I’m sorry-” Namjoon starts with an unnecessary apology, it wasn’t his fault that you lost the favourite book of your youth, that you missed the chance to give your mother one last glimpse of the pages with you before she passed.

“It’s fine,” You cut him off not wanting to dwell on the loss or risk deteriorating that perfect cover right here in front of him, in front of everyone, when he has something important to attend to. “Should we go find seats before they start the auction?”

Namjoon nods, seeming to examine your eyes with careful study, but he will find no tears, no dampness there, those are locked away tight. He escorts you to a seat near the back. “This way we can get a better view of those bidding without looking out of place.”

The auction lots pass by with many remaining silent. Namjoon points out several antique dealers to you that are snapping up many of the pieces. But the rest of the buyers all appear to be waiting for the same prize that Namjoon is.

“Do you have any favourites to win?” You whisper to him as the collection is carried into view.

“I’m hoping for anyone I’ve dealt with in the past.” Namjoon nods in the direction of a middle aged woman dressing in a fur trimmed coat and strands of pearls draped around her neck. “Mrs. Coleman already has a few works in one of the exhibits, and Mr. Roth over there.” He turns to a man wearing a tweed jacket and a sturdy wooden cane in hand. “Is one of the most notable patrons of the museum.”

Silence falls in the room as the auctioneer takes up the gavel again and describes the works. Many around you sit up a little straighter as Namjoon’s eyes dart around at those he thinks might attempt to purchase.

The bids flood in, with very few gaps for breath as the numbers are rattled off. It takes only two minutes before the going price is more than your annual salary. You lower yourself, pooling in your seat as the extravagant wealth is thrown around you.

Once the pace slows, Namjoon's face highlights his concern, his eyes glancing back and forth between two people, the older lady in mink he spoke of before, and an unknown man with a cell pressed to his ear.

As the wooden hammer drops so do the corners of Namjoon’s lips.

“And sold to the gentleman on the phone number three-two-eight, number three-two-eight for sixty-five thousand.” The auctioneer announces.

“Shit.” Namjoon mutters under his breath.

“What, what happens now?”

“Now we have an anonymous buyer who I have no ability to meet or advise.” He sighs, hanging his head, with his fingers dragging across his mouth again.

“I’m so sorry.” You whisper as he nods next to you taking several deep breaths. Your hand reaches out to his arm and he turns to you with a small smile.

“It’ll be fine, I’ll figure something out, but I might as well make the most out of my time here.” With the auction now over he rises from his seat and approaches one of the museum's patrons with an outreached hand. “Mr. Roth, good to see you, you’ll be attending the final night of the exhibit I hope, and who is this with you...”

While Namjoon continues to make pleasantries and exchange business cards you keep your eye on the sketches watching as they are rolled behind the desk and packed away in crates. You approach the area where one of the clerks is recording and distributing the information for the now rightful owners, with a mob of bidders descending on him for their newly purchased items so they might leave as soon as possible.

It would seem that this business too is feeling the crunch of Christmas. A flurry of paperwork is exchanged in haste passing from one hand to the next, until one signed receipt of purchase escapes his notice and falls to the ground in front of you. Picking it up you wait for the crowd to clear, giving the clerk a chance to recover before you approach with the lost sheet, setting it on the desk before him. His confused gaze soon changes to outright shock over his loss when he realizes what you’ve returned.

He thanks you profusely, causing you wonder how much strife he would have encountered had you not been there to return it. “No problem, you look like you have a lot on your plate.” You smile politely, attempting to soothe your fellow casualty of the Christmas rush. “I just have a question for you though, if that’s okay?”

“Not at all how can I help?” He agrees, his stance far more relaxed than it was with the horde a few moments before.

“My friend, he was hoping to get in contact with the purchaser of those sketches there, on behalf of a museum. I don’t suppose there’s any way we could get a hold of them, is there?”

“I’m sorry but not at liberty to divulge that ma’am.” Your rising hope falls, you knew it would be a long shot but you didn’t want to leave without trying. “However... if there’s a phone number or information regarding the museum’s interest I can include that in the paperwork to send off along with the purchase.”

“Really? You would do that?”

When the clerk confirms, you immediately turn on your heel and take a step in Namjoon’s direction before bumping into his solid chest, not realizing that he had already come to find you.

“What are you doing-”

“Getting you that miracle.” You grab one of his business cards from his hand, and turn back around to give it to the clerk who tucks it into the envelope along with the other documentation. “Thank you.” You smile at the clerk who returns the gesture.

“And you said I have a dangerous smile?” Namjoon mutters as he leads you away with a chuckle. “What did he say exactly?”

“That he would include it with the paperwork for the sale. I just hope they will reach out and call you.”

“Me too.” Namjoon smiles, but it doesn't quite appear to reach his eyes. “Shall we head out. I think I’m done here.”

The drive home is rather quiet, the weight of Namjoon’s gloom hanging in the air and he makes no attempt to hide it.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, just trying to figure out where to go from here,” he groans. “Those sketches were going to be the start of something new for me. I know the buyer might still come through but I’m not going to hold my breath. I need to keep searching for what comes next, I’m just a little lost, but I’ll find my path again soon.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“Sometimes it is, sometimes life will drop it right in front of me and other times I will have to search for it, but that’s a problem for after the holidays.” Namjoon looks out his window at the lights which start to come alive as you drive home. “Are you ready for the big day?”

“Christmas?” You give a nervous laugh, “No, I haven’t even put up any decorations.”

“Why not?!” Namjoon asks in alarm.

“Just haven’t really felt the need this year. There’s no one there to enjoy them but myself.”

“Which makes it all the more important to put them up.” Namjoon sits up in his seat, his whole persona changing. “I could help you if you’d like?”

You wince over the quandary. With your decorations sitting in your living room under an inch of dust it might arouse some confusion, and his heart would likely sink if he knew how long they actually rested there for. “I’m not sure I’m quite ready for it yet. Maybe another time?”

...

-1.5 Weeks Until Christmas-

Work continues to degrade as the countdown progresses. The only thing getting you through the shifts is the thought of Namjoon’s help at the stand. But as soon as Christmas is over, you wonder if your friendship will go the same way as the festive season, cast aside like the wrapping of the gifts you tended to in the weeks prior.

After a few days of busy shifts you’re both thankful to make it to another close. But when you are packing up the station Namjoon’s phone starts to ring. He looks down in confusion at the number without a contact attached. “Do you mind?”

“No, not at all.”

He grins as he answers the phone pacing further back into the vacant shop space and away from the sounds of the echoing mall. You continue to count off the deposit, and roll the wrapping paper. Trying your best not to listen, to give Namjoon his privacy, however you can’t help but notice the happiness in his tone, spotting his dimples from across the room when you sneak a glance. When you grab to move the last box of bows Namjoon ends his call. Tears glisten in the corners of his eyes accompanied by the widest smile you’ve ever seen from him.

“That was- that was the buyer.” He explains as he comes to help you with the final box, taking it from your hands and placing it on the back shelf. “He wants to meet with me this weekend.”

He’s so close, vibrating with an overwhelming delight. His arms move around you as though he is about to pull you in for a gracious hug. You start to congratulate him as he embraces you, “Really?! That’s gre-” only to be cut off when his lips come for yours instead. Once the shock evaporates, you start to appreciate the heat of the moment, the warmth of his skin, the softness of his mouth. Your hands reach up to his toned shoulders and neck pulling him down, diminishing the space between you. Breathing him in like this with your eyes closed, nothing else matters in the moment, nothing other than his firm chest pushing back against yours, his hands on your waist gripping at your shirt.

With a deep sigh and a bite to his own lip he pulls back. “Sorry I just-”

“Don’t, don’t apologize.” You cut him off this time.

“I can’t even begin to thank you.”

“I hardly did anything.” You laugh at the extremeness of his appreciation, though a small part of you dies when you realize his kiss was nothing more than a gesture of gratitude.

“That’s not true...” He responds, giving you his wide eyes and a shy smile.

On the drive home your companion can barely contain his delight, breaking into random smiles and laughter as he informs his coworkers of the success via text.

“There’s this event...” Namjoon starts, as you pull in front of his home. “At the museum on the twenty-third, a week from today, I was wondering if you’d like to go with me.”

“Next Wednesday? But we have a shift at the wrapping station.”

“I spoke to Emma a few days ago and she agreed to cover if we both wanted to go.”

“Emma, making a change so close to Christmas? I don’t buy it. What did you offer her in return?” You ask with a critical gaze. The woman runs such a tight schedule, only something great or important would have prompted her to agree.

“My next year of service.” Namjoon confesses, he looks down at his feet as though he might buckle from the embarrassment.

“Next year? You already promised to work it?”

“If you want me there that is. I’ll practice more in the meantime, I promise I won’t leave you to all of the difficult packages.” Namjoon chuckles. “But what do you say, will you go with me?”

“Ye-yeah I would love it’s just...” You stutter trying to come up with a good excuse but your brain draws a blank leaving only the truth. “I don’t know how well... how well I’ll fit in there.”

“What? No, why would you think that?” Namjoon places his hand on your leg while you drive. A move which causes the both of you to pause in reaction and him to retreat. “Trust me when I say you belong there more than anyone else.”

You nod your head and give him a small smile, wishing more than anything his hand would return. “I’ll come if you want me there. What’s the attire?”

“Semi-formal, and don’t worry about driving I’ll pick you up.”

...

-2 Days Until Christmas-

You stand in front of your mirror, wearing a dress which fits your shape perfectly, but stretches your pocket book significantly. The price tags hanging down from the zipper taunt you, tempting you to rip them away, to commit to the indulgence. Even if it’s only for a night, the payoff in the end might be worth the overpriced lace. You give in with a snip of the scissors and a swallow of guilt, letting the printed cardstock hit your bedroom floor.

You’ve spent the past couple of hours leading up to this moment in a fit of stress cleaning, disposing of the dust bunnies. Now at least if Namjoon comes over after... you won’t be completely off guard.

The phone on your bedside vibrates with a new message.

KNJ: Just pulling in.

YN: Be right down.

Sliding your shoes on and grabbing what you need, you leave your empty apartment with a growing smile on your face. The moment you can see the car from the buildings foyer both Namjoon and the driver exit the vehicle, though Namjoon is quick to wave the driver back to his seat, choosing instead to hold the door for you himself.

The thoughtful gesture is made more appealing as if it gives you a full view of your date in his dark three piece suit, his hair tamed back framing his handsome face, whose gaze appears to be giving you the once over for you too.

“You wrap up nice.” Namjoon jokes.

“Of course, I couldn’t embarrass you now could I? Have to land that first impression.”

“You would never. Besides I’m sure my colleagues will be fascinated to know who has enough courage to teach me how to wrap.”

“And how do you plan on introducing me to those colleagues of yours? As your date or your teacher?” You laugh.

“I was actually hoping I could introduce you as my girlfriend.”

“Your girlfriend for tonight?” You panic, not expecting this development. “Wait, is this one of those fake dating scenarios? Did you tell them you had one and then-”

“I think we’ve been watching too much Hallmark.” Namjoon laughs and shakes his head. “No this is not one of those scenarios, but I’ll take whatever form of companionship you are the most comfortable with.”

He gives you the stare of a man who is looking for more, but you know he won't need you once the holidays pass. His loneliness is temporary, yours is permanent. You’d rather not get your hopes up only to have them lost as he fades away in the cold gloom of January when his family returns. “Let’s see where it goes.”

Upon arrival Namjoon leads you through the massive doors by hand, taking your coat and checking it. The main hall just off the entrance is filled with patrons and staff all mingling and drinking while dining on tiny hors d’oeuvres. You look at the crowd with apprehension.

Namjoon’s fingers interlace with yours again, a grip clearly intended to give you confidence. “I’ll introduce you to some of the staff first.”

Several people congratulate Namjoon on the exhibit as he passes, he responds giving them a brief thank you as he ushers you through the crowd. Stopping at a small group of two, who greet Namjoon with a warm welcome.

“Thank god you’re here, people have kept asking for the brains behind the exhibit.”

“And why didn’t you answer them.” Namjoon smiles before turning to introduce you to them, following up with the man who just spoke. “This is Eric Nam, a curator who I worked on the project with.”

“Don’t pass the torch, we both know it was your idea, I just helped put it into motion.” His coworker smiles gazing at you. “And you must be the one Namjoon has talked so much about.”

The heat rises to your face as you look to Namjoon who confirms the statement with his own embarrassment. “Thank you Eric for sharing that with her...”

“No problem, it’s the least I could do for someone who gave you the insp-”

Namjoon coughs and shakes his head, cutting off his verbose friend.

You're about to question your partner himself when the other colleague of his starts asking you questions. “What do you do for a living Ms....” You remind her of your name while Namjoon spotting refreshments wanders off with a whispered promise to get you both a drink.

“I-I work for Interlude Shipping, in their tracking department.” You explain clasping your hands together in an attempt to settle your nerves.

“Oh, how nice...” The false quaintness in her tone is matched with a smirk as she takes a sip of wine. “Maybe you can help me find out if my sister’s present will arrive in time tomorrow.”

“Valerie...” Eric growls.

“What? I’m merely curious about her employment.” She smirks at him before continuing to her inquisition. “How long have you worked there? Did you have to get a degree for your role?”

“No,” This is exactly what you were afraid of coming here, you just didn’t think the judgement would be coming from someone who works with Namjoon. “I started there right after high school. I didn’t have the luxury to go to an elite school to work in a place like this.”

Eric comes over and claps you on the back. “Neither did Valerie; she just has family on the board.” Giving a coy smile to his coworker who scowls and stalks off without another word to you. “In fact you’ve actually done more work here than her in the past month. I hear you’ve been helping Namjoon secure the collection we’ve been after?”

You nod looking off after the departed curator, worried as to what impact your interaction could have with Namjoon’s position here.

“Don’t worry about her. She’s just bitter that Namjoon didn’t ask her to accompany him here.”

“Oh, does she- do they-”

“Fuck no, but if she’s not everyone’s first choice she’s not happy.” Eric gets in a little closer. “You don’t have to worry about Namjoon looking elsewhere, if he’s at all hesitant it’s just because he’s a little cautious with you.”

“Why would he be cautious?”

“Why would who be cautious?” Namjoon asks, handing you a drink as he appears by your side again.

“Mr. Roth, that man should be careful. I heard he had hip surgery recently.” Eric responds, cutting in with a lie to cover your discussion. “It's good of him to still join us tonight, but enough about that, why don’t you go show her the exhibit before it gets too crowded in there?”

Namjoon offers up his arm in agreement. “I suppose we can get started on the tour, if you’d like.”

“Yes please,” You answer, threading your arm through his. “Thanks again Eric, it was nice meeting you.”

“You too, I’m sure I’ll see you again soon.”

The stand next to the entrance bears all the names of those involved in the creation and a countless list of those who loaned out pieces to make it possible. “There’s so many involved, how large is this exhibit?”

“Not too big, you’ll see why there’s such a long list soon.”

When the door opens you find yourself in a hallway amidst what you can only describe as a snowstorm. The walkway, made to look like an alley set adrift in snow, with flickering lights and paper creations hanging from the ceiling. “Did you make any of those?” You ask, grinning as you squint through the flurrying beams.

“No, I left those to the talents of the students who came by on school field trips. It didn’t take them long before we had enough.”

“Find any new prodigies?”

“Several.” He answers, before pointing to the mounted photos on the wall. “But these works here are some of my favourites.” The pictures are framed to seem as though the viewer is looking in through the pains of a window to happy holiday scenes. From unwrapping presents around the tree to the busy crowds of your very own mall, each image sets out to draw from you a sense of nostalgia.

“I can see why.” You find yourself lingering on the last of the photos by an accredited local photographer, savouring the display as much as you can, worried that it might end too soon.

“Don’t worry,” Namjoon whispers, taking your hand in an eager urge to press on, “There’s plenty more to look at.” He points to the end of the hallway, where you find another door, though this one is dressed with a knocker and wreath looking as if it’s the entrance to someone's home.

You open the door to reveal a series of rooms connected by one long hallway. The first you step into you washes over you with warmth and comfort, the sound of a cracking fire surrounds you while the light of fake embers flows from the side. Set up through the room are tables of items from old to new ranging from Christmas tree ornaments, and household decorations to handwritten cards. “All of these-”

“Were loaned by families from the region, they gave a piece of their history and traditions up for most of the season so everyone could enjoy it. Over here we have...”

You could spend hours sitting and admiring in this room alone, but more than anything you want to push on more to see Namjoon’s excitement in sharing it with you. Each room features a different spot of the home. A chilly shed with vintage toboggans and sleds, a kitchen, stuffed with cookbooks and the smells of baking featuring countless cookie cutters of every shape and size.

The next room is a little unusual and different from the rest, throwing you off for a moment, when the distinct scent of pine hits your nose. In the centre you find what look to be the replication of a massive trunk, and above false branches twinkling with lights. All round in a circle you find toys in glass cases spanning generations, when it hits you. “Are we under the Christmas tree?”

Namjoon gives you his coveted dimpled grin. “Yeah, do you like it?”

“I do. I can’t believe you managed all of this.” You exclaim hurrying between each display like a kid on Christmas morning. From wagons, and Rubik’s cubes, all the way to Furbies and gaming systems he has the whole collection of popular toys throughout the years.

Namjoon beams with pride once you’ve circled the entirety of the fake trunk and the presents beneath it. “Only one room left, but I think you’ll like this one the most.”

You're ushered into the next, a dimly lit space, a bed with a quilted cover stands in the centre, and on the walls you find countless story books, pinned open to so their stunning art is on display, papering the room with climatic holiday scenes and loveable characters. In one you find Scrooge meeting the ghost of Christmas past, in another you witness the Grinch save the sleigh from a perilous fall. Namjoon was right, this is without a doubt your favourite. While people filter in and out, you take your time looking at each set of pages. Your pace slow and steady, until you reach the special story that stops you entirely, the book you lost long ago, and have been trying to find ever since. Drawn on the pages before you is a little blue koala, with a pale purple nose, round ears, and a smile that lights up his face as he cuts out dozens of snowflakes. Namjoon stands behind you with a hand on your shoulder as you gaze at the book you know to be titled ‘Koya’s Christmas.’

You take a deep breath, while trying not to bend to the tears that threaten to break from your eyes. Focusing your attention instead to seek out the owner of the book, but unlike most there is no nameplate attached to this desirable artifact. “Namjoon, who loaned this? Is there any way I could contact them?”

When he gives you a sad smile, your gut clenches over the possibility that this might be a similar issue to what happened at the auction, a lender who wishes to remain anonymous. The only difference here being that you’ll fight Namjoon for the information if you have to. You’ve already let this book escape from you last year, you refuse to let it happen again. “Please, I’ll-” Just when you are about to plead with Namjoon’s integrity, another memory of your past walks into the room, but this one unfortunately has more tragic ties. “Shit,” you whisper, shifting to put your date between you and the newcomer.

Namjoon catching the change in your expression immediately reaches out in concern. “What? What’s wrong?”

“There's someone I know just over there,” You nod in the direction behind Namjoon. “I’d like to avoid him if I can. Sorry, it-it’s complicated. ”

Namjoon puts his hands on your shoulders, eyeing a path the closest exit without letting go of you. “Do you want to leave?”

“If that’s okay?” And just when you thought you were free, when you were ready to make a break for the door. The man in question, spots you and calls out your name.

You turn to face him, trying your best to keep your tone even and your lips pulled into a smile. “Jackson? Hey, it’s good to see you.”

“It’s been so long, not since...” Thankful he stops, not dragging up the subject you wish to avoid.

Namjoon moves closer, moving his arm from your shoulder around your waist, a comforting and protective gesture. “Dr. Wang... I had no idea the two of you were acquainted.”

“You know him?” You ask Namjoon, your concern rocketing over what else your date might become privy to.

“Dr. Wang was the phone bidder. I invited him here tonight to see the work we do.”

“The exhibit was impressive, I can’t wait to see what you have planned next.” Jackson confirms.

“I should go and let the two of you discuss-” You ready to step away when Namjoon’s hand grabs yours and Jackson calls your name again.

“No reason for you to leave, we should catch up.”

“May-maybe later?” You plead with him fighting back the tears, pushing down the memories his presence drags up. “Sorry I just, I need to go.”

You pull your hand free and race to the exit.

“Wait.” You can hear Namjoon call behind you. Though you continue to proceed out the exhibit and towards the closest exit outside, breaking into the cold evening air, only to find that he still followed. “Let me call for the car and we can go together.”

You stop in realization that your running will not deter him, he’ll pursue you unless you give him a reason otherwise. “No you should stay, this is your big event, I won’t ruin it for you.”

“Not without you.”

“Please Namjoon,” you beg, adamant that he return. “I don’t belong in there, I don’t fit in and I never will. Even when I try...” The ghosts of your past have a way of finding you and destroying your facade.

“I’ve told you before you belong in there more than anyone else-”

“That’s not true. I can barely keep myself together. I can’t, I can’t go back in, I'm sorry.”

“I don’t understand, what does Dr. Wang have to do with it? Did he hurt you? Did he-”

“No! No, he did nothing of the sort. Jackson was always very kind to me. Don’t let me affect your plans or any arrangement, you should go back and talk to him, I just can't be there.”

“You think I’m going to just drop you for him, especially when he makes you so uncomfortable? No, I’m leaving with you.”

“Fuck, just... please listen to me. He is a good man, he’s a good doctor, you would be foolish to give up this chance.”

“A good doctor...” Namjoon pauses as a grimace hits his face. “Does he have something to do with your mother?”

“How-How do you know about that?”

“I didn’t mean to pry, I swear. It's just, when I was first talking to Emma about you, out of concern she opened up about your past... about your mother, about your loss.”

“She told you?” Aunt Emma, you should have known she would do something like that, god forbid at least one person not know your history. “Then all of this, these past few weeks were they all out of pity?” You should have known, there was no way he would like someone like you. It was all out of sorrow for what you’ve been through.

“Not pity no, I like you, I like you a lot. When Emma said you were pushing her and so many others away... I concealed it out of fear of losing you too. I wanted you to open up about it until you were ready. I was just trying to help you get through this.”

You look up at the museum, drawing a distressing connection between Namjoon’s daily life and you. “Why? You think I’m some abandoned project you rescued from a deceased’s estate? One for you to mend, and later show like an achievement? You should have just left me where I was, instead of breaking me further.”

Namjoon’s hands immediately pull back from you. “I never meant to hurt you. Only help you move on, you can’t deny that you are frozen in place. You have so much more potential, but you're living in denial.”

“I live there because it hurts less...” You snap back in fury, as he exposes your painful flaws. “I live there so I can work, so I can help others.”

“But what about you? When will you let someone help you?”

You step away unable to answer his question, turning your back on him you race to the sidewalk to hail a nearby taxi, refusing to let him see a single tear fall.

Once home, you crawl into bed after throwing the dress to the floor. This was so far from the evening you had hoped it to be, with you instead left alone to ruminate on Namjoon’s words. Despising all the evidence he laid bare against you, turning it over again and again in your mind until your morning alarm startles you out of your stupor. Signalling for the last shift before your break for the holidays.

...

-Christmas Eve-

It’s finally here, the worst of all days at the call centre. With your eyes heavy from a lack of rest you take a seat at your desk with an extra large coffee in hand. On your computer you have this morning's team email pulled up, and attached to it a list of de-escalation tactics. You’ll need them today because if people don’t get their package by the end of the routes this evening, there’s no hope for tomorrow morning.

The call board on your phone is already lighting up like a Christmas tree, but you know those little embers to be fuelled by wrath, fury and unkept promises of delivery dates.

You try your best to remain calm during the egregious conversations. Offering up tips and tricks to parents who are worried that this will be the year that their child gives up on Santa because your company failed to deliver.

Your lunch break can’t come soon enough. But when you finally check your own phone it’s littered with texts from Namjoon. Messages of concern, apologies, and the hopes that he will still see you at the wrapping station tonight. He even sent a picture of your abandoned coat and promised to bring it along.

Fuck, you had completely forgotten about you wrapping shift together. Just one more night, then you can put it all behind you again. If you can just keep your cover for a few more hours then it’ll all be over and Aunt Emma will have what she was promised.

You send Namjoon a quick message confirming that you will be there, but not promising any more before you head back to your desk.

The calls get progressively worse with several people using foul language and demanding to speak to your supervisor, you try to talk them down as best you can knowing any call passed on to the higher ups will reflect poorly on your efforts.

Until one woman calling in search of her package finally wears you down, insulting you, your profession, even your family.

“Ma’am I’m sorry but if you continue to speak to be in such a way I am well within my right to disconnect the call.” A desperate bluff, your superiors would rather them end the call than you, you’ve been penalized for it before, and you’ll be damned if it happens again. But unfortunately she calls your hand.

“You will not! I have spent hours on the line trying to reach anyone. The shortsightedness of your company and staff is all too apparent.”

“It’s the holiday sea-”

“I know what time of year it is, but it seems your staff doesn’t realize Christmas is tomorrow!”

“You ordered your package past the guarantee date, we could not insure-”

“Now you listen to me, if there was any form of intelligence in that office you’d be working hard to ensure that all packages make it out before tomorrow morning, but instead you just sit on your ass fielding phone calls and giving excuses so you don’t have to actually go out and do honest labour. You must be the biggest disappointment to your family, not even having a proper job. How can you go home and face them knowing you've left so many without their gifts?”

With the woman's last insult, something inside you finally snaps, giving you the freedom to do what you’ve dreamed of for so long. “I don’t,” you pronounce, building up to take your final shot at both her and your employment. “Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to let you go, as I’d rather not listen to your nonsensical bitching. So merry fucking Christmas to you ma’am, I suggest you go spend it with your own family if they’re willing to put up with your pompous ass.” You hang up the phone and pull off the headset, refusing to answer the next blinking light that comes on to replace it.

You just sit there looking at it denying the next caller their chance at verbal abuse, and your company's lax policy to protect you from it. The chatter of apologies continue to echo around you as your coworkers press on, but after the years of abuse you can no longer hold it in. Your company always said that this position was a stepping stone to greater things, that opportunities would come you just had to wait a little longer, but after being shackled by circumstances, and no forthcoming higher step to take, you refuse to press on any longer.

...

You pull into the mall parking lot, far too early for your slot at the wrapping stand, with the contents of your desk now stationed in the trunk of your car. Taking refuge in the women's bathroom cleaning your face of the tears you shed on the way over as you try not to think too much about what you’ve just done. After refusing to concede and admit to any wrong doing you quit, telling them to shove their shitty policies right back where they came from.

Namjoon was right... and with the mall closing early tonight you’ll only have two hours with him, two hours to smooth the tension over and allow for an amicable goodbye while maintaining your cover.

He’s already waiting for you, with your coat in hand, when you show up. The look of pity that you never wanted to see grace his face directed at you. “Are you okay?”

“Fine... I just would prefer if we didn’t talk about last night. I’m sorry for what I said, and now I just want to let it all go if that’s okay with you?” You smile up at him extending the olive branch.

Namjoon nods looking down at the floor as his hands habitually fold a scrap piece between his fingers. The silence between you is drowned out by the carols echoing down the emptying halls of the mall.

“Didn’t expect it to be so slow.” Namjoon mutters after what seems like an age with no one coming to the stand.

“On Christmas eve? Yeah generally people are home by now, spending time with their-” You force yourself to stop, unable to say a word which will bring sorrow to your heart and loneliness to Namjoon’s.

“I’m sorry I can’t do this,” Namjoon interjects. “I want to talk about last night, I need to talk about it.”

“Now is not the time.”

“There’s no one here but you and me. It’s just us, the mall is closing, it's our last shift, if not now when?”

“Anytime but now. The last twenty-four hours have been the worst in my life since-since...” You take a deep breath burying the wave of sadness and regret back down in your chest refusing to let it out. “Please, just forget it okay?”

“Not until you stop shielding yourself like that.” Namjoon scolds you. “I’m tired of you living in fear that your tears will erode your cover, and that your anger will tear it away entirely. I’m tired of you thinking that people will only appreciate you if you maintain this perfectly wrapped state. You might think it’s pretty, that it’s convenient for everyone else, but you are only keeping others out.”

“Maybe I keep it on so that you won’t be disappointed in what you find when it’s discarded. A sad woman, with no direction, no dreams, unable to cope with loss, and I suppose I can add unemployed to the list now. Is that what you want to see? Is that what you want to find?”

“That’s not all you are... and as for your job, I’m sorry but fuck it. It’s about time you moved on to better things, that place was only holding you back, you deserve so much more.”

“No I don’t, do you want to know why I worked there? Do you? I took that job to make sure she got the care she needed. I promised her when she got better I would quit and find something else, but she never did. But if I leave now I’m accepting the fact that she’s gone... that she doesn’t need me anymore, because I couldn’t do enough to keep her here.” The first tear falls breaking through the long standing divide.

“Staying there wouldn’t have brought her back. Tormenting yourself by remaining frozen in place, won’t bring her back. It’s Christmas for god sake and you are being kind to everyone else but yourself.”

“This isn’t Christmas for me. If it was, she would be here... not you. I’m tired too. I'm so tired of looking at her chair and- and-”

Namjoon wraps his arms around you pulling you forward as your emotions tear through the shroud. He moves you to the back of the vacant store sitting you among the boxes. “I’ll be right back okay?” You nod, while he tugs the table in and drags the gate down to indicate that you are now closed. When he returns his eyes too are starting to redden. His hands brush through your hair, the side of his palm pressing on your cheek and catching your tears. After seeing one of his own fall you crush yourself against his chest, clinging harder to him than before. His lips touch the top of your head, his hands rubbing on your back and arms as he waits, waits for you to be the first to pull away. The lights for every other store shut off around you the music lowers, all that’s left is the retreating chatter of those going to celebrate the eve of Christmas, and still you hold on to him.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been a very good substitute.” He whispers, encouraging you to finally lean back and admit your denial, accepting his efforts to help, when you yourself wanted to do the same for him.

“Don’t say that, it was never going to be a happy holiday for me, just something I needed to get past. But for you, I at least wanted to make yours better, I’m sorry I wasn’t a very good one either.”

“You never were a substitute. You were the one I wanted to spend the holidays with. A different Christmas than usual but no less enjoyable.”

“That’s sweet of you to say.” You smile, but you doubt it’s true. “I suppose we should go...”

“What about all the supplies?”

“Emma will come by in a few days to collect it all.” You grab the small donation from the lock box and seal it in the plastic pouch, while Namjoon rummages through his own bag. “Do you still want a ride home?”

“If you're offering, I would love one.” The flap of his satchel closes as he stops his search and instead goes with you to the bank and finally your car. You hadn’t checked the forecast for tonight so finding your car buried in a few inches of snow comes as an unexpected sight. At least with Namjoon’s help cleaning it off is a quick task.

Once inside you both warm your hands on the sputtering heater, changing them on the wheel as you continue to thaw your fingers while you drive.

“Do you have any plans for the next couple of days?” Namjoon presses, though hesitant in his tone.

“Maybe look for some jobs, and take a good long nap?” You answer with a dark chuckle, still preferring to miss the entire holiday if you could. “You?”

“No, nothing in mind. But if you wake up and want to come over, you're more than welcome to spend it at my place.”

You return both hands to the wheel as the road becomes more difficult to drive on, your tires slipping here and there on the ice beneath the snow. “I’ll think about it, though depending on how much snow we get tonight we might both be stranded at home.”

You pull through the neighbourhood gates and up Namjoon’s driveway. With the car stopped he once again dives into his leather bag and pulls out a thin rectangular gift he looks to have wrapped himself. Dressed as per usual, with far to many pieces of tape, he hands it over to you. “I know this won’t make up for everything, but I want you to have this. Consider it a very belated Christmas gift.”

“Belated? But Christmas isn’t until tomorr-” You take the present and succeed in pulling back the wrapping to reveal the book that you were reunited with just the night before. “Oh...” You look up from the cover to find the return of the sad smile on his face you saw in the museum. “But if this is late then, last Christmas, it-it was you? You were the one at the stand... with this?”

...

-One Year Ago-

You are counting down the hours and minutes until the mall closes, until you can pick your mother up from her doctor's appointment and head home, to your promised tradition of putting up the decorations. The past few weeks have been so busy, with work, volunteer shifts, and her treatments at the hospital, you’ve made it all the way to Christmas eve with the tree and ornaments still packed away in boxes, sitting in the corner of your living room since December first.

Aunt Emma is currently taking your mother’s position at the cashbox, thanks to the scheduling of the last minute check up. You light up your phone again checking the time, only an hour left.

“You can head out if you want my love,” Aunt Emma offers while swaying and humming to the carols. “It’s quiet enough for me to manage myself.”

You grin embarrassed by your desire for a hasty departure. “No it’s fine. I’m still waiting for the phone call to say she’s done, otherwise I’ll just end up waiting at the hospital.”

“Suit yourself.” She stands up to look down the halls of the mall. “Oh, I think we might have someone, he’s heading this way. He’s cute too, you should give him your number and put that mother of yours at ease.”

“Aunt Emma, I don’t need your dating-” You look in the direction she was speaking of losing the rest of your words when you find a tall beaming man coming closer to your station.

“If you need me I’ll just be in the back fetching more ribbon.”

“But we have plenty.”

“Doesn’t hurt to be prepared.” She waves herself off when he makes it to your table.

“Hi,” He greets you with the warmest smile and an even tone. “I was wondering if I could get these wrapped together?” He holds up a bag of gifts which he hands over to you.

“Of course. Any preference on paper?”

“Whatever you think is best, it’s for my mom. Just a bottle of her favourite perfume and something a little more special.”

You open the bag to find a small box containing the fragrance, and the other what looks to be a kids picture book. But what initially seems to be an odd choice for his mother, slams your chest with nostalgia when you see the cover and read the title.

“Koya’s Christmas.” You laugh with delight, you can’t stop yourself from smiling when you examine the artistry. The memories it brings back is enough to make your eyes well with tears.

“You know it?” The man asks, looking pleasantly stunned.

“Know it? I had it memorized as a child. I loved it so much I couldn't bear it when it was packed away at the end of Christmas each year.”

“Me neither, I flat out refused to let it go, I read it year round to the point where our old copy is currently falling apart on the shelf. Even made snowflakes to put in my windows like he did.”

“That’s right, that scene was one of my favourites. May I?” You gesture asking him for permission to look through it. He nods just as excited as you by the concept of something so sentimental. As you flip through the book you recall the beautiful storyline of a koala living in Australia, one who is so upset that they must celebrate Christmas in the summer, never getting to have a while Christmas described in the songs and shown in the movies. But once Koya talks to the leaves in the trees, and the other small animals of the forest, the realization hits that none of them would be able to stay there if it was cold enough for snow.

You are so close to tears when you reach the page where the little koala realizes it’s more important to have friends for the holiday than the frozen flurries. Proceeding to stay up all night cutting out perfect snowflakes to hang in the windows for all to enjoy at the family's Christmas Eve party.

“Where did you find a copy? I’ve looked for so long, I lost my own in the move here.”

“I actually found it by chance, amongst a bunch of rare second-hand books at an auction.” The man itches at the back of his head. “Sorry, I can’t be of more help in locating another.”

“No it’s fine. I’m just glad I got to see it again. I’ll have to tell my own mom that I was lucky enough to see a copy, she loved it as much as I did.”

You quickly wrap the two gifts in the one sheet as requested. Handing it back to him before you can be tempted enough to make an excessive offer of your own on his mothers gift.

“Thanks again.” He hands you two twenties for the donation. “My mom usually helps me with the wrapping but I didn’t want her to see this, you’ve made her Christmas.”

“I’m glad I could help.”

When he walks off you notice that he makes several glances back to you, holding a smile each time.

“So did you get his number?” Aunt Emma pokes her head back out from the stock area. “Maybe his social media, his dick-dock or whatever it is you kids do these days?”

“No, I did not get his tiktok.” You answer, unable to contain your laughter. “I was distracted by-” You’re ready to defend yourself when your phone starts vibrating on the table, the screen lit up with the number of your mother’s doctor’s office. You answer it, excited to share your account of the book. “Hey mom, you all finished? You’ll never believe what I just wrapped-”

“Sorry dear this is Laurie, I’m just calling on behalf of Dr. Wang’s office. We were hoping you could come by as soon as you can, the doctor would like to meet with both you and your mother before she leaves for the day.”

“Y-yeah, I’ll be right down.” You hang up the phone taking a deep swallow of fear, the moment of happiness and nostalgia vanishing with the prospect of the news to come. It’s never been a good sign when they’ve wanted to meet with you both in person.

Aunt Emma catches on in an instant, pushing your coat on your shoulders and your purse in your hand. “Go, I’ve got this. You give your mother a big hug for me, and I’ll stop by soon to see you.”

...

While you try to relive, to pull back and hold on to, that moment from a year ago, Namjoon nods confirming your suspicions.

You mentally kick yourself for not recognizing him, for not remembering a single thing about him except your connection with the book. But after everything you had gone through, in that night alone, the devastating news regarding your mothers health had blacked out everything else. You took her home that night, trying not to cry, trying to be strong for her. Helping her into bed for some much needed rest, leaving your previous plans boxed up in the corner... where they remain to this very day. And the year only got worse leaving your mind engaged elsewhere, far from the man with the kind smile and similar taste in literature. “I’m sorry, I can’t believe I didn’t recognize you sooner.”

“No, it’s fine, it was a while ago, and I’m the one who should be sorry,” He whispers. “The moment I stepped outside that day, I realized you needed it more than my mother needed a second. I went back, but you were already gone. I was selfish though, rather than leaving it with another, I wanted to be the one to give it to you myself, I wanted to see you, to talk to you again, and so I kept it. I even put it in the exhibit on the chance that you might find it. When I met Emma at the museum and found out that you’d be doing the fundraiser again it seems like fate, but then I heard about what had happened since I saw you last. I realized how foolish I had been, how I had stolen your chance to share it with her before she passed.”

You reach up to your face attempting to wipe away the tears before Namjoon can see anymore, but he catches your hands before you can hide your grief.

“When you saw the book that day, you have no idea the impact it had on me. Watching you react, your emotions so close to the surface. You didn’t care where you were, what you were doing, all you could see was the memory in front of you. I wanted to create that for everyone.”

“Then the museum exhibit-”

“Was a result of my meeting you, my breakthrough idea which got me a chance to curate was thanks to your reaction. I was going to tell you when we were there, why you deserved to be there more than anyone else, but everything fell apart so quickly.”

“I’m so sorry, I never intended to ruin your night. I just-” You take a deep breath, finally letting out the words you’ve been holding back. “I was scared. Jackson was one of my mother’s doctors, he was always friendly and kind to the point where my mother would joke that he would make the perfect son-in-law. We even went on a date, but when she passed... it was difficult, painful for me to see him again. Finding him there last night, I was so worried you would learn about what had happened, and that you would look at me with the same pity he did, so I ran.”

“You didn’t ruin it, I deserved what you said for not being more open with you about what I knew. I was scared of losing you. So no more running, no more hiding okay?”

You give him a nod, unable to speak through the tears as you gasp between sobs. He hugs you across the cars divide. “Now will you please come inside? At least for a bit. It’s Christmas Eve and I can’t let you go home like this. I have the snowflakes up and everything but we both know it’s not enough without someone else to see them with.”

You shake your head, now laughing despite the tears, “You really know how to reel me in.”

“I’m just admitting that I don’t want to be alone on Christmas,” He looks at you with a raised brow. “And I don’t think you want to be either.”

...

Namjoon’s house is the very opposite of your apartment, filled with warmth and light, wooden furniture and plants in every corner. The Christmas decorations bring another layer of himself into the fold. As promised, his window pains are full of snowflakes and the sills... you squint at several small blue lumps perched beside the glass. Moving closer you recognize them as clay koalas made by the skill and hands of a much younger age. Namjoon catches you staring at one position in a dozing state. He takes it off the ledge and hands it to you to give a better look.

“Careful with that one though,” He points to another figure stationed in the corner. “It’s ears like to fall off.” He rolls the round bit of clay out of position chuckling as it exhibits the trait.

“Did you make these?”

“When I was a kid. My mom held on to them.” Namjoon muses as he continues to fidget with the figurine. “She dropped off a box of decorations before going off to be with my sister and her family.”

“I’m glad she did.”

“Me too. But even with all the trimmings and decor here this year doesn’t feel quite normal.” He replaces them both in their rightful positions of honour and gestures to the massive couch behind you. “Make yourself comfortable,” he insists, before wandering off to the joint kitchen. “Is there anything I can get you to drink?”

“I’ll have whatever you're having.” You take a seat on the monstrous cushions, which ease you in before swallowing you in comfort. Making it easy to see how this beast of a sofa has eaten several of his several earbuds.

“Beer okay?”

“Perfect.”

He comes round with the drinks and takes a seat beside you. Turning on the television he lets it play with low volume in the background so you might continue your conversation if you wished, but at the same time eases the pressure from you if you’d rather not.

You smile down at your beverage as the overly dramatic film plays out. Your mind still lingering on the damage that you might have caused with your hasty departure the night before.

“Have you talked to Jackson since, is he still going to loan the sketches?”

“He wants to, he sent me an email today saying so...” Namjoon pauses taking a sip of his drink, swirling the contents around in the can. “He asked if you were okay too. I haven’t responded yet, I wanted to talk to you first and get the full story, rather than speak on your behalf. But it’s clear he has feelings for you, if you told him how you felt, I’m sure you could still work things out if you wanted to.”

“No, I don’t think it’s feelings but his concern. He’s just too good of a person not to worry, and I’m sure his own guilt has a place in there too. Jackson and I never would have worked out, we went on that date, we didn’t have much in common, there was nothing there that I wanted to pursue, not like my time with you.”

Namjoon’s eyes perk open as he smiles. His arm reaches around, pulling you in to lean on his side and shoulder. As the strained plot plays out before you.

“Why do you insist on watching these.” You ask as your eyes become heavy after a few minutes. Leaning into Namjoon more he lays back putting his feet up and sliding you down with him to do the same. Your head now resting on his chest the deepness of his voice carrying down to your ear.

“They’re like the snowflakes-”

“A paper thin plot full of holes?”

“Funny and true, but not what I meant. I know they are by no means real, but they have this way of adding to the feeling of the season. I didn’t realize how much of a tradition it has become for me and my family until this year, when watching them alone just felt wrong. The movies were an excuse to sit down with them, to talk and laugh. The other night when I called, it wasn’t that I couldn’t sleep, I just wanted to spend the time with you.”

“But why me? You could have anyone, even Valerie seems to-”

“Why would I want anyone else when you helped me achieve something I’ve long dreamed of? You may think this cheesy but at the end of all these films, when everything comes together wrapped in a perfect bow, that’s how I’ve felt in every moment with you.”

“You’re right, very cheesy, but not unwanted.” You look up at him from his chest finding only sincerity in his face. “Now if we’re to continue in this similar Hallmark course of action, I do believe this would be the part where you kiss me again.”

“But I’m just the clumsy lead,” Namjoon jokes. “I’m pretty sure that’s your-” You lean in doing just that, cutting him off and pushing him against the couch as you kiss him. His chest quaking with silent laughter soon turns to rumbling groans as you fulfil the expectation of your role. “Though this would also be the part where I tell you we should wait before giving into temptation.”

Your nose scrunches up in displeasure over the notion of such abstinence. “Then let's omit that line, and go off script for the rest of the night.”

Namjoon takes his turn, flipping you over to push you down onto the plush cushions, where you sink under his weight. “Gladly,” he growls, his mouth trailing down your neck pulling on the collar of your sweater to seek further in.

Desiring the same you discard your own knit garment, before moving on to unfasten the buttons of his shirt, pushing it back until he is forced to tear his hands from the sleeves himself and whip it down to the ground.

Sliding between your thighs he wraps your legs around his back and picks you up off the couch. With an arm wrapped around your waist, he continues to kiss you while you squeal from being lifted into the air.

“Bedroom?” You ask, excited by the possible prospect.

He nods, looking up at you with a smirk. “If that’s okay? I’d rather not risk losing you to the couch too.”

You giggle at the notion, while Namjoon heaves you up again to get a better grasp, his mouth tucking into your chest. He fumbles for the door now behind you looking as though he might break it open if the knob won’t turn to his grappling grip. You reach back to assist and push it open. The cool air of the room hits you, causing you to cling to Namjoon’s warmth.

With two more steps you’re lowered onto the bed, where he grips the waist of your pants, unbuttoning and tearing them down your legs. Laying on the edge of the mattress, you watch as Namjoon kneels down between your legs. His hands glide up your bare legs and pause at the tops of your thighs massaging them as he asks to go further. “May I?”

You take his fingers and press them down on the dampening fabric. Namjoon groans and dips the tip of his index below the material peeking inside to find the warmth of your cunt. It’s a pity it’s so dark in the room, you would have liked to see his smile.

But it seems you're not alone in this desire, as Namjoon gets up and reaches over flicking on the lamp beside his bed. “No more hiding, I want to see you, all of you.”

“I want that too. I want you.”

He smiles kissing you with both hands before rolling over and pulling you on top of him. You return the favour by taking off his pants and boxer briefs releasing his erection. Running your fingers down the soft skin of his shaft, curling them around the base. Tilting his cock towards your mouth you take the tip, teasing your tongue on the rim of the head. Namjoon groans in delight, thrusting his hips up, you take it again as far as you can manage, enjoying his reactions to your tongue trails downward, tracing the swelling veins of his dick. With another drag of his cock you release him with the pop of your lips and he reaches down to grip your arms, breathing heavily with closed eyes.

“I thought you said you wanted to see me?” You chuckle at his undoing.

“I do, but I also want to last.”

“Condoms?” You ask, continuing to stroke his cock while you adjust to straddle his thighs.

“In there.” He mutters, pointing to his bedside table breathless and helpless to your touch. Only looking up when you have to free him to reach for the box and unwrap its contents. His own hands help you to roll it down his shaft.

You guide yourself down on his cock while Namjoon arches against his pillow and mattress. His fingers tracing up your stomach and ribs. You reach back to unclasp your bra just as he reaches your chest, and lean down into his touch.

With his firm grip you rock your hips clenching on his dick and grinding your clit on his pelvis. The louder he gets the faster you move, trembling as you chase your own high and pivoting down further. When Namjoon’s hands grip your hips pressing you into him the pressure becomes far too great pushing you over the edge, sending waves of pleasure through you until you collapse on his chest. He holds you in place as he thrusts from beneath, gasping as your climax continues, coaxing you to clench down on him, straining his thrusts until he comes.

Dotting the side of your face and neck with his lips at a soft and slow pace, he succeeds in forging another smile in your still gasping lips. He tilts you off and beside him in your blissful haze so he may dispose of the filled barrier. When returning to your grasp you cling to him and he you, dragging the covers up and over the both of you.

“I could get used to this.” You whisper, curling into his warmth. No longer afraid of the emotions that the holiday will bring. Glowing over the prospect of not facing Christmas morning alone, but wrapped together with Namjoon in the sheets of his bed. “Maybe even consider it a new tradition?” You joke with him looking up to witness his smile.

“If that’s a tradition...” Namjoon whispers, coming in for another kiss. “I plan on celebrating Christmas everyday for the foreseeable future.”

#bts smut #namjoon smut #namjoon x reader #kim namjoon #bts x reader #rm #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #bts christmas au #bts angst #bts fluff #bts wrapped together

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nalu4emily · 3 years

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The Unexpected Reward - Chapter 17

Summary: Natsu and Lucy go on a job together, but what they bring home is something neither anticipated. Forced to make a life changing decision, they have to adapt quickly, but that's never easy, especially given the circumstances. As they work together on their toughest adventure yet, they find themselves drawn to one another, in ways they never realised. Rated Mature.

"Hey, Flame head! Wait up!" Gray called over, catching the fire mage as he hurriedly made for the guild's exit. "Where're you going in such hurry?"

Turning to catch the ice mage walking straight for him, Natsu stopped to answer, "Home. I left Lucy and Haru asleep this morning, so I better get back to 'em."

"Oh... You've not been at the guild much lately, is everything cool with you?" The ice mage pushed further.

"Uh… Yeah! Been kinda busy and stuff, ya know." The slayer shrugged, not seeming too interested in divulging any further information.

"Well, are ya too busy to come on a mission? It's been some time since our last job together as a team." Gray asked, scratching the back of his head.

"It has been a while, now you mention it… I'd have to ask Lucy if she's feeling up to it yet, she's still not feeling too good… Anyway, catch ya later!" Natsu spoke cheerily and turned back towards the door, his hand reaching for the handle.

"Lucy's been sick for an awfully long time now, Natsu." He heard another voice say, halting him in his tracks, "Are you sure there's not something else going on?" Lisanna came up and elbowed him playfully in the arm.

"Hm?" He replied, retracting his arm back to his side.

"That's right! Lucy hasn't shown her face in months now. Has something happened? Are you guys having relationship issues?!" Levy gasped at the thought, her eyes wide with her mouth hung low.

"Relationship issues?" Natsu cocked his eyebrow in disdain; what kind of nonsense was that?

"I think you're getting a little carried away there, Shrimp. You've been reading too many books again." Gajeel teased, poking Levy's pouted cheek as he came up from behind. "And Lucy hasn't been gone that long… has she?"

"How suspicious… His beloved is sick and yet he's not with her!" Juvia murmured, appearing creepily behind Gray, making him shudder. "What is he hiding?"

"I'm not hiding anything! You guys are looking way too much into this." Natsu lied, but for good reason.

The truth was a little more complicated than that. With Lucy being so unwell, she'd not been able to leave the confines of their house, having suffered greatly in the first months of her pregnancy. It'd been hard for the both of them, but Natsu had promised to look after her—to not leave her side, and he'd kept to his word. Having skipped out on job after job, and taking longer and longer breaks between each visit to the guild, it was only natural for their friends to worry and speculate, but it did put him right in the firing line.

He was wasting time. He had to get back to his partner and son, it wasn't fair to keep them waiting. The guild would get their long awaited answers when Lucy returned, which with any luck, would be very soon.

"Can I go now? I got things to take care of." Natsu huffed, starting to get frustrated with their incessant intrusiveness.

Trying to slip out from under the guilds snooping nose, the fire mage was beginning to question whether that was even an option any more, not with the amount of people now crowding him, wanting in on the action. He just hoped the great Titania didn't decide to intervene, then he'd be doomed.

"What things would that be then, Natsu? You're not usually this secretive." Lisanna hinted again, even more curious than before. "I thought you said you had to go home?"

"Just leave the kid alone, he's got his reasons." Laxus shrugged nonchalantly, pretending not to be interested, when really he'd heard everything.

"Yes, listen to Laxus!" Freed jumped in, also creepily appearing out of no where, making the lightning mage quiver. "Natsu doesn't need you all pestering him!"

Said boy sighed, glad to have someone on side and took the opportunity to make his leave—But things were never going to be that easy. The slayer found himself almost smacking his head against the thick, wooden door frame, utterly exasperated, when yet another of his guild mates decided to pipe up and add their two pennies worth.

"Yes, you're right. However, doesn't he usually have the kid with him? Why not today? So many questions that have yet to be answered. It makes you wonder really…" Evergreen chortled to the dubious guild members, hiding her conniving smirk behind her fan.

This was getting out of hand! They were just going 'round and around in circles and at this rate he would never leave. Being backed into a corner, he had no idea what was really going on. His guild mates were chucking all sorts of nonsensical bullshit at him.

Who knew what they were accusing him of? Because he sure as hell didn't know, and was pretty convinced now that they didn't either.

"I've already said Haru's at home with Lucy… The only reason I'm here, is to check in with Mira to make sure everything's ready for his party later. You know, for his birthday today." He explained once again, sighing loudly and slumping forward in despair. "I wasn't gonna bring him in early and spoil the surprise, now was I?"

He wouldn't have bothered with any of it, if it hadn't been for the take over mage and her desire to throw some massive party for the little boy, such was the way of Fairy Tail. But this time, Natsu would've much preferred to celebrate at home where Lucy could be present to enjoy it, too. However, Mira had made her own plans, having suddenly sprung the idea upon the unknowing young man one day in passing, and had given him little choice in the matter—his ultimatum much scarier than Erza could ever be.

"We're well aware of the little one's birthday celebrations today, Natsu." Erza's stern voice echoed through the hall, startling everyone into silence and swiftly marched herself right up to the slayer's retreating body. His heart raced as his worst fear became reality and felt a wave of dread as she approached at speed, her hardened features coming in way too close for his comfort. "However, that doesn't mean I'm any less suspicious of you."

"But why?! There's nothing to be suspicious about, I swear!" Holding his hands up in submission, the fire mage was stunned into silence; his mouth dropping open in disbelief; why were they all so hell bent on this? What even was this? He'd told them what he could; what more did they want? "Lucy and Haru are at home where I left them… What else do you want me to tell you?"

"So secretive and elusive… like you have something to hide. Have you no shame?" Ignoring Natsu's plea, the armoured girl had already come to her own conclusions and summoned one of her treasured swords to point directly at the slayer, her icy glare not the only thing threatening to pierce through him, "Our Natsu would never act like this! He's impulsive and reckless and just downright stupid! What have you done with the real one?"

The fire mage would've taken offence, had the red head not so angrily directed her sharp sword at the bridge of his nose. Narrowing his eyes at the sharp metal so close to him, he gulped thickly, praying to whatever god there was, that today of all days, Lucy might just walk through those big doors, saving him from the hell that was Erza Scarlet.

He shook in his sandals, showered in sweat as the red heads sword tip made contact with his skin, pushing his head right up against the wall, "B-But I am the real Natsu…"

"Then prove it! Explain yourself, now!" She was taking no shit from her fiery companion, not after convincing herself that he was, indeed, an imposter.

Desperate not to be on the receiving end of Erza's wrath, Natsu opened his mouth to speak, but just as quickly shut it again when the old guild doors suddenly creaked open. The sound of an infants voice followed by bickering between two others could be heard filling the loud silence, abruptly halting the interrogation of the defeated fire breather.

"See, Happy! I told you he'd be in here!" The young woman pointed, her eyes landing right on the dragon boy she'd been arguing with flying cat about, only realising moments later the presence of Erza's sword and every eyeball in the building staring unashamedly at her, "Uh… Am I interrupting something?"

"Lucy... you're here..." Natsu croaked in relief, never more glad to see his beautiful girlfriend as he sank to the floor. His voice cracking from the genuine fear the older girl had provoked in him, her sword now fully removed from his face. "My sweet saviour…"

"Uh-oh! Is Natsu in trouble again?" Happy giggled, glancing over at his pink haired friend, taking pity on his horror-stricken features.

"Lucy… You're alive?" Erza stated more than asked, stomping over to the young blonde to inspect her further.

"U-Uh…" The girl in question looked down at herself, confirming that she was definitely alive before looking back up again, confusion etched into her expression. "D-Do you want me to answer that?"

"Maybe you should lay off her a little; I'm sure Lucy's had it rough enough." Gray proclaimed bravely, unable to make eye contact with the unsettled knight.

"Please don't scare her off, not when she's only just returned!" Levy all but pushed Erza out of the way and threw herself at the blonde, who was now trying to balance the new weight along with the baby and herself. "I'm so happy to see you! I've missed you, Lu!"

"I've missed you too, Levy, but I'm sure Natsu's kept you updated." Lucy reassured her, then looked up to all of her other friends, "Hasn't he?"

"Natsu told us you hadn't been feeling well, but that's a suspiciously long illness Lucy, one I hope has a good explanation for making us all worry so much." Erza explained, crossing her arms over her chest.

"That's one long tummy bug!" Mira giggled, walking over to the ever growing group to stand near Lucy. "Anyone would think that you were p-" She paused, eyes growing wide with realisation and darted them down to the stellar mages midriff, before promptly fainting on the spot.

"Huh? Mira! Would think, what?! What were you going to say?!" Lisanna yelled, desperately trying to wake her sister up.

"Oh! I get it!" Gray understood, thinking back to the weird conversation he'd had with Natsu in the park and how it all made perfect sense now. "It definitely explains that idiots weird behaviour." He reached out to pat Lucy on the shoulder affectionately and smiled at her, then turned to smirk at said fire mage still recoiling on the ground. "So that's the way you wanna play? Game on, Pyro!"

Turning his head, Natsu smirked back, accepting the silent challenge as he jumped back up to his feet, looking cocky as ever, "You know it, Frosty!"

"Wait, what does Gray know? Is he a part of it too?" Levy gasped, pointing her accusatory finger at the demon slayer.

"Hell no!" Natsu and Gray yelled out in defence, both offended and totally disgusted by the very thought.

"Then what? What is going on here?" Cana shouted from her bench, having heard everything. "Quit with the suspense and just be out with it already!"

"Juvia understands." Out of the shadows, said water mage appeared before her once 'love rival' and smiled happily at the girl she was about to congratulate, "Juvia is so very happy for you both!" She looked down to her own rounded tummy and placed a hand on it, a noticeable difference in size to Lucy's, "They will be the best of friends, Juvia is sure of it."

Lucy's smile reached the corners of her eyes, relieved the rain woman didn't see this as another rivalry, like their partners apparently did, "Thanks Juvia, I'm sure they will be, despite what their father's might think." They both giggled at the expense of the boys gormlessly standing there, along with the rest of the guild, who still had no idea.

"Hold up! So, what does that mean? You're having a baby too, Lucy?" Lisanna asked, cradling her sisters limp body.

The guild's eyes fell to Lucy, more specifically her stomach where if they looked closely, they would see a small, but noticeable bump stretching out her pink summer dress. She could see the expectant faces of her friends waiting for her to answer, and the warm presence of her beloved dragon slayer come to stand next to her, obviously noticing her hesitancy.

"Natsu, I think you should tell them, I know you're dying to." She murmured, her voice quiet but firm.

"Are ya sure, Luce?" He asked, assuming she'd want to do it after all this time, but seeing the certainty in her eyes and the bright smile lifting her cheeks, he took her hand and turned back to the crowd, not needing any more confirmation than that. He glanced at each person in turn, a sense of pride filling his chest as the words left his mouth, "Heck yeah, we are!"

The entire guild erupted in a chorus of whistles and loud cheers, shaking the very foundations of the building in their excitement for the couple, "Oh, wow! Thanks guys! You're too kind!" Lucy's smile shone brighter than it had done in ages, overwhelmed with glee that their guild mates were so pleased for them.

"They've all been worried about ya, Luce." Natsu whispered closely so only she could hear and leaned in to kiss her cheek, knowing just how much this all meant to her. He took the excitable little guy off her hands, giving her the freedom to catch up with everybody.

"I knew it! I knew there was something fishy about you two! But congratulations guys, that's great news!" Levy cheered, ready to get down to the nitty gritty of every dirty detail.

"You had us worried there, Lucy. For a while, I thought you were never coming back!" Lisanna shared, hugging the celestial mage tightly, probably a little too tight.

"Oh… I'm sorry to have made you all worry, but I'm feeling much better now." The blonde explained, a light tint of pink dusting her cheeks from all the attention she was getting.

She could see Natsu hadn't moved too far away from her and tilted her head to look at him. Chuckling to herself, she could hear Erza try to apologise to him, suggesting the boy punch her right in the face for making such a mistake, a suggestion that was right up his alley, if it weren't for Haru in his arms.

Catching his beautiful blonde staring at him through the corner of his eye, he turned in her direction and winked, grinning as he held the little boy up on his shoulders to walk back over to her, "You feeling alright, Luce?" He asked, worried she may have forced herself into attending the celebrations before she was ready.

She nodded shyly, a little taken aback by the overwhelming attention she was receiving. Feeling his hand once again take hold of hers, she stared up into his confident eyes, then up to the child having the time of his life on his fathers shoulders, "I'm okay, but today's about Haru, not me, and I wasn't gonna miss this for the world." She grinned up at the small boy and reached up to stroke his cheek affectionately, chuckling at his enormous smile.

"You're right! Come on, Lucy! I wanna show you what we've done!" Natsu all but dragged the poor girl outside, Haru and Happy in tow, to show her the sheer amount of effort that had gone in to making Haru's first birthday, special.

The entire guilds courtyard had been lit up like a Christmas tree, with nothing left untouched. Banners and bunting of every colour hung from every post, table and tree. Tables upon tables of delicious food had been laid out with the most gargantuan home made birthday cake (courtesy of Mira) proudly sat in the middle of it all. An enormous pile of gifts had also been laid out, all individually wrapped with little cards to say whom they were from and most importantly, the pool had been filled with all kinds of fun inflatables and toys for all the children to play with.

Lucy looked around in amazement. She couldn't believe they'd gone to so much effort just for a one year old, a child that would unfortunately never remember this, but it didn't matter, she and Natsu would for him. "This is incredible, Natsu! I can't believe you did all this without me!"

"Don't sound too surprised; I can help organise things when I want to. And it wasn't all me, Mira came up with the idea." He looked up to the child above him and chuckled, "You like it, Haru?" The child had no idea what was going on, with no concept of birthdays or parties, he simply cheered anyway, responding to his Daddy's infectious grin, "Good! Well then Luce, let's get this party started!"

With his grin turning evil, he squeezed her hand tight and dived head first into the pool, with no consideration for his, Lucy's or Haru's clothing. She yelped at the top of her voice, her only reply a cackle before being submerged under water, thus setting the mood for the rest of the day.

After a full afternoon of playing with the other children, eating lots of cake and other treats, and opening presents, Haru found himself in the pool once again, this time in more appropriate attire for the water. A pair of cute little lion themed trunks (gifted by Loke), and a cute turtle inflatable ring adorning his middle (a present from Lisanna), made it much easier for him to stay above the surface while enjoying a swim in the water.

Natsu, in his usual flamed swim shorts, also found himself in the pool, diving under and popping back up in random places to surprise the little boy. Haru loved a good game of peek-a-boo, the anticipation of where his Daddy was going to pop up next was just too exhilarating. He squealed and laughed every time he resurfaced, then his eyes would grow wide in anticipation when he dived back down again.

"Gotcha!" Natsu exclaimed, appearing behind the little guy and grabbing his sides. "Does Haru want a go?" He asked, lifting him out of the rubber ring and holding him above the surface with just his hands, letting the infant tread the water to keep himself up, "Look at you! You'll be swimming in no time!"

Lucy watched on from her sun lounger, not remotely amused that the slayer had got her cute dress soaked, or that she now had to lay in just her pastel blue bikini, feeling somewhat self conscious with everyone staring at her exposed belly. She laid comfortably basking in the hot sunlight kissing her skin, trying to catch some semblance of a tan, relaxing while she could. She felt happy, content even, thankful that her symptoms had calmed down just in time for Haru's big day.

It'd been a long time since she'd been able to do this without having to run to the bathroom. With no spell or potion being strong enough to truly rid her of the awful feeling, she'd become well acquainted with the toilet in their house, having spent most of her time with her nose down it. It'd been hard over the last few months adapting to her changing body, her wild mood swings and questionable cravings, but she also knew it would be worth it in the end and it was on days like this, with her friends and loved ones surrounding her that she sincerely felt it.

Smiling to herself, Lucy placed her hand on her small, protruding stomach, feeling the tiny flutterings of the little one moving around inside, "You're an active little one today." She giggled, looking to be talking to herself by onlookers, but she didn't mind. "Then again, you're active everyday."

"Juvia's baby is quite active too, but he's closer to his due date than yours and is much bigger." Juvia said, coming to sit on the next lounger. She cradled her own, much larger bump that'd been covered by a flowy, light green summer dress, finding her regular clothes to form fitting and hot to wear now. "It's quite the feeling when he does somersaults in Juvia's belly."

"He? You're having a boy?" Lucy asked, intrigued to learn more and catch up with her friend.

"Yes, Porlyusica told us the last time we visited. Juvia always imagined she'd have a little boy, maybe watching Haru has something to do with that." She gleamed, looking over to the small fella splashing about in the pool still, having the time of his life with his father.

"I'm so pleased for you! I bet Gray was thrilled!" The blonde exclaimed, knowing he would be.

"Of course! Gray was very pleased. In fact, he made us go out and buy all the boys clothes we could find in the market afterwards. Then he took Juvia home and made-"

"No, it's okay… I don't think I need to know any more!" Lucy felt her cheeks burn red at the very thought.

"Made Juvia dinner…" The water mage finished, furrowing her brows at Lucy's assumption.

"O-Oh… Oops! Sorry Juvia, I thought you were going to say that you guys-"

"Made love? I think those hormones are getting the better of you, Lucy." Cana appeared, wagging her imaginary tail at the slightest mention of sex. "They say you get more horny when you're pregnant. I bet you and Natsu are at it all of the time? Actually, I'm kinda surprised he's not over here right now, with you looking all juicy like that!"

"Cana!" Lucy spluttered, her cheeks burning even more furiously. "You can't say things like that in public!" She didn't want to discuss her sex life in front of others, even if what they were saying was true—when she wasn't heaving of course.

"She's right though, Lucy. Juvia hasn't been unable to keep her hands off of Gray." The blue haired girl reaffirmed, her eyes like love hearts as she thought of her beloved Gray. "And Gray hasn't been able to keep his hands off Juvia, either."

"Wow, looking kinda smug there… You were like that any way…" Cana murmured, shaking her head at the love struck girl.

Well, there went Lucy's relaxing in silence, now she could barely keep from her head exploding—Good ol' Cana! "I don't wanna hear any more!" The celestial mage reiterated, covering her ears for emphasis.

"Oh, come on, Lucy! You're pregnant! That didn't happen by accident! You and Natsu knew exactly what you were doing." Cana retorted, moving herself closer to the flustered girl, her boozy breath permeating the air.

"U-Uh… Well… No, actually. It was kind of an accident…" Lucy admitted, feeling a little awkward by saying that out loud, her friends surprised faces not helping matters, "But it was a good accident!"

"Huh… And here I was thinking you were the cautious type, Lucy… Not that it matters. It's good to let the mood just take ya." Cana grinned, her shock forgotten.

"Don't look so ashamed Lucy, you'll both have another sweet baby to call your own and that's a wonderful thing. I imagine Natsu was over the moon when you both found out." Mira beamed her usual motherly smile as she came to sit near them all, having wanted to get the details on Lucy's pregnancy since earlier, "If Juvia's is a boy, then I bet yours is going to be a girl, Lucy."

"You think so?" The blonde asked back, never having actually considered what the sex would be before, but the thought of having a little girl join the family sounded rather appealing, especially in a house dominated by boys.

"Yes, with Haru as well, we need a little girl to make it more even. And she's gonna have the cutest pink hair and big brown eyes, I can just see it now!" Mira was off in a little world of her own, thinking of blue haired baby boys and pink haired baby girls—she was incorrigible.

"Boy or girl, I just hope that after living in a house full of ravenous beasts, this little one might be more like me. Haru's just a dark haired Natsu, he even laughs like him." Lucy placed her hand where she could feel the little movements of her baby and chuckled down, "But who am I kidding? You've already got your father's energy, that's for sure."

"Hey! Don't say that like it's a bad thing, Luce!" Natsu overheard as he appeared out of no where. "There's nothing wrong with having a mini-me, ain't that right, kid?" He hi-fived the now dry child in his arms, having already dried himself using his magic. "Who cares what they are or who they look like? You'll be in there somewhere, Luce; you're their mother, after all."

"Yeah, you're right." She said, always fascinated by Natsu's simplistic, yet logical way of thinking.

"Any way, it's getting kinda late, I was gonna take Haru somewhere a bit more quiet," Natsu gestured to the current brawl taking place behind him.

"Leaving so soon?" Mira asked, standing to say goodbye to the grizzly birthday boy.

"Yeah, he's all pooped out from the busy day he's had and I think he's ready to go to sleep now. Thanks for organising it, Mira!" He said, before turning swiftly to Lucy, "You coming?"

The bikini clad girl jumped to her feet and stretched her arms up, feeling the tiredness begin to set in, completely unaware of her partners roaming gaze, "Yeah, sure... Just let me put my dress-"

"Lucy! Watch out!" She heard Natsu shout suddenly as she bent to grab the item of clothing.

Feeling herself being pushed back onto the sun lounger, she flailed and reached her arms out to catch herself. Darting her eyes up to see what was going on, she was met with the exposed back of the dragon slayer that had moved to shield her from something. Smoke clouded him and the infant; an unfamiliar heat emanated off of his body. The girl hadn't seen what'd happened, or what she'd been saved from, but if the harsh, heavy breathing of the man in front of her was anything to go by, it was a close call.

"Natsu…" She started, but stalled there after, unsure of what more to say to him.

"What the heck do you think you're doing, you old geezer! Do you have any idea what could've happened just then?!" Natsu bellowed, his voice teeming with rage as his eyes narrowed at the culprit. "You're lucky I was here to catch your stupid attack, or that would've gone straight for Lucy!"

The brawl had come to a complete stand still and Macao, the one that'd thrown a fire ball initially at Wakaba, had gone ghostly pale as the dragon slayer's piercing gaze stared him down. "Hey man, I'm sorry… I didn't even know she was there, it was an accident!" He held his hands up in submission, not wanting to enter into a fight with the maddened slayer, knowing that was one he'd never win. "We got a little carried away, that's all."

"Oh yeah? Maybe I should go all out and see how you like it? Try and dodge this one!" Natsu roared, sending a blazing ball of fury of his own hurtling through the air, aiming it right at Macao's cowering body. Turning hotfooted back to Lucy, the distant cries of the offender being struck by his magic was like music to his ears, his anger satiated.

"Are you hurt, Luce? Did anything hit you?" He did a full search of her body, checking for any kind of injury. His worried eyes eventually fell upon her exposed belly and instinctually brought his hand out to caress it softly, "Is the baby okay?"

Smiling up at him, she brought her own hand to rest on his cheek and pulled him closer, loving just how protective he could be, "Of course, our baby's fine. No need to worry." She guided his palm to where the little one was doing somersaults and allowed him to feel the light pads against his skin.

Unable to keep his infectious grin down for long, he pushed his mouth hastily against Lucy's in a kiss that turned heated all too quickly. Buzzing with adrenaline from the incident, Natsu moved his hand from her belly and tangled his fingers into her hair, holding her in place as he enjoyed the taste of her warm lips.

"That's it, fire breath, you took it too far this time!" He heard Gray shout from behind him, knocking him out of his 'Lucy' trance and pull away, glancing over his shoulder, "Look at what you've done to the pool, you dumbass!" The ice mage pointed to the steaming pit that was once the guilds pool, fuming at the state of it.

"Ha! Looks like you and Juvia are gonna have a fun time filling that back up!" Natsu guffawed, passing the fidgety Haru to Lucy.

"Screw you, Pinky! You're going down!" Gray threatened, launching himself at the fire wizard and starting yet another brawl.

Rolling her eyes, Lucy looked down at the sleepy boy rubbing his tired eyes, and decided to creep away from the fight that just seemed to be attracting more and more people, "Come on then, sweetheart. It looks like Daddy's got himself distracted again." She chuckled, disappearing back inside before anyone had noticed she was gone.

By the time the evening swept in, Lucy had found herself a quiet spot up on a small hill a little ways from the guild, overlooking the lake behind it. She sat cosily against one of the many old oak trees, with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders and the baby laid across her chest, begrudgingly, but slowly falling asleep. She hummed her sweet lullaby to soothe her tuckered out child, hoping to coax him into closing his eyes.

It was moments like this that she cherished the most with Haru, just her and him with no one to interrupt. The atmosphere was peaceful and calm, exactly what she was looking for compared to the ruckus that was the guild's 'after' party that continued on down the street. She could even hear the rumble of their antics from where she sat, but luckily, it was pretty muffled, unable to spoil her quietude.

After weeks of staying at home, it sure made a pleasant change to be watching the sunset instead. She'd grown tired and achy after such a busy day, her feet were sore and her head had grown weary, but still she watched contented as the beautiful evening began to fade.

The young mother could finally hear the soft, even breaths of the slumbering child and gently placed him upon her bent up legs, covering him with her blanket to keep him from feeling the chill in the air. Staring at his little angelic features, she found it hard to fathom how drastically her life had changed compared to just twelve months before. She'd grown so much as a person and gained everything she'd ever wanted and more, making new memories along the way.

She and Natsu had unknowingly plunged themselves into a completely new world, taking on the responsibility of an abandoned child and calling him their own. Haru had opened their eyes to a life they never thought they'd get to experience, especially not with each other. The little boy had brought them together in a way that would forever bind them, creating the family unit they were today. It only seemed fitting to name this day as Haru's official birthday, for it was the day his life, and theirs, had begun anew.

Leaning her head back against the tree, becoming lost in her memories, her eyelids began to close, a wave of exhaustion rushing over her while sleep tempted her in. A rustle of a nearby bush was quick to quash that feeling though, as a startled Lucy snapped her eyes wide open and darted her head over to where the sound had come from.

"Oh, Natsu… It's just you…" She breathed, laying her bleary eyes onto that familiar toothy grin and untameable pink hair, a scaly, white scarf to match. "Tell me, what were you doing hiding in the bushes?"

"Looking for you." He said simply, walking out onto the hillside to join her, having deliberately left out the part that he'd been hiding there for much longer than he'd care to admit. In fact, one might say he'd been there the entire time, watching the beauty that was Lucy quietly sing their son to sleep and hadn't wanted to disturb her until she'd finished. "You left, so I had to come find ya."

"Oh, you didn't have to. I just wanted to settle Haru before he started getting grumpy. It's nice and quiet out here." Her voice sounded airy and light, her eyes half lidded and a little bloodshot. "You can go back and join the others if you want, I'm okay." She offered, but Natsu knew better than that, he always did.

"You don't have to pretend for me, Lucy. I can see how tired you are." He'd learnt pretty quickly in the past few months that pregnancy didn't just make her exceptionally sick, but that it had an array of different symptoms, some physical and others emotional, but all unpleasant and incredibly draining for her. "Why would I leave any way, you're all out here?"

"Happy's not."

"Yeah, and Happy's capable of looking after himself. He's too interested in Carla to notice we're even gone. You know what he's like." Natsu explained, scooting closer to Lucy to take the infant from her legs.

He set the baby down in his lap to keep him warm, the fluffy blanket tightly swaddling his body. The two mages cuddled up to one another, watching the twinkling stars come out to glimmer and shine down onto the glistening water in the distance.

"It's crazy to think it's been an entire year since we brought him home. Who knows where we'd be without him here?" Lucy reminisced, her gaze drifting from the moonlit lake, to the baby snoring peacefully without a single care in the world. "Or where his life might've gone, if we hadn't taken him in."

"We'd be what we always were," Natsu stated bluntly, tearing his own gaze away to look at the girl beside him, "Best friends, going on adventures and honestly, that's kinda the sad truth of it all. As for Haru…" He glanced down at his cuddled up son, smiling sadly as he remembered the first time he ever set eyes on the tiny, lifeless baby, that fateful day, "I made a promise to keep him safe; to make sure he lived… He was always going to come with me, there was never another choice. I just didn't know it then."

"And I'll be forever grateful that he did, because..." Lucy cleared her throat, feeling a little emotional at the thought, "Now, I have you and him! And nothing has ever made me happier! Choosing to adopt a child was the most daunting thing I've ever done, but it's proven to be the best decision I've ever made, one I'll always be thankful for." She gave her own toothy smile, a slight tint of pink dusting her cheeks as she poured her heart out to him.

Natsu felt his heart squeeze tight, her words reminiscent of his own feelings and quirked his lips up at her. Reaching his hand forward, he smoothed his fingers through her golden locks, before coming to rest it under her ear, guiding her to him, "Me too, Luce. Which is why…"

Lucy's breathing deepened the closer she got and felt his other hand come up to hold hers tenderly, paying no mind to him fiddling with her fingers, "Which is why, what? Is there something else?" She asked, cocking her head cutely as their breaths began to mingle. "Natsu?" Her eyes fluttered between his dark ones, waiting expectantly for him to finish.

"I… I wanna ask you something." He murmured just before claiming her mouth, connecting their lips in a kiss so sickly sweet, it made Lucy's belly fill with butterflies.

She could have melted into a puddle right then and there, the feel of his affections always had a way of making her turn to goo in his hands. Her spine shivered and the adrenaline buzzed through her system, not having the capacity to comprehend the words that'd been spoken, for her mind had been taken over by the feel of his hot mouth. Letting go of her hand, he snaked his fingers up to the other side of her neck and pulled her closer, craving those sweet cherry lips that he liked to nip at with his teeth.

Her fingers were now free to roam and touch as they pleased, tangling them up through his hair and tugging on the pink strands at the base of his neck. Desperate for breath, she pulled herself away and gazed into his half lidded eyes for mere seconds, before he impatiently delve down to ravish her neck. The sucking and biting just under her ear caused small gasps and whimpers to escape the increasingly aroused celestial mage, her eyes fogging with lust, until something bright caught her attention.

"What was that?" She asked panting, her voice raspy as she tried to catch sight of whatever it was again. It had flickered like a light, shined like a reflection and sparkled all at once, making her wonder if she'd really seen anything at all.

"What was what, Lucy?" He asked her, not meaning to sound quite so unsurprised, when usually he was the first to go looking for trouble.

"I thought I saw…" She didn't really know what she'd seen, her mind too muddled from the heated moment they were having; maybe it was just her eyes playing tricks? Or worse… someone was spying on them.

Natsu clasped at the hand she had buried in his hair and brought it into view, "Was it this, maybe?" He asked, drawing attention to one specific digit.

Feeling the contrast between his warm skin and the cold hardness of something else against her finger, Lucy peered down in curiosity, her breath stalling when her eyes laid upon the object of confusion. Gasping loudly, she clasped at her mouth, two enlarged chocolate orbs flickered between him and her hand in utter astonishment. Somehow, in the midst of their make out session, Natsu had managed to band the most simplistic, yet beautiful ring onto her finger, where it sat proudly and spoke of untold intentions.

"It's… I-It's beautiful! B-But how did you- When-" She stuttered, too lost in what this all might mean, searching deep within his dark eyes for the answers to her silent, but obvious questions.

"That's the right finger, isn't it?" He asked, looking uncharacteristically nervous, a small pink hue dabbing his cheeks. His heart was beating much quicker than he would've liked, hoping he hadn't screwed up already.

That was all she needed to hear to confirm her suspicions, her brown eyes wet with unshed tears, "N-Natsu, I… I don't know what to say-" She couldn't speak, this was too much and he'd not said anything yet.

"Lucy…" He spoke with every sincerity, taking the ringed hand and entwined their fingers. "I'm not so good with this stuff, but I know that getting married is important to you, which makes it important to me, too. I promised you forever and I guess you could say, this is me making good on that promise." He caressed her soft cheek with his thumb and smiled when he saw the glint in her eyes shine back at him. "So, what do you say? Prepared to commit yourself to this," he gestured to himself and winked playfully, "For the rest of your life?"

Finding herself unable to keep her emotions in check, the girl didn't answer, but instead, launched herself at him, giving him barely any time to move the slumbering child out of the way and brace for impact. Landing on top of the winded dragon slayer, she managed to catch herself with her hands and gleamed down at him, tears falling from her eyes and the smile on her face rivalling his. She leant down and connected their lips once again, taking the lead this time, unable to keep her happiness from pouring out.

To the side, still held in Natsu's opened out arm, was Haru, completely unaware of what was going down, his dreams taking him to far off places. His developing sibling in his Mommy's tummy, however, didn't seem quite so pleased, having been wedged between the two loved up adults as they made out under the sea of stars, had decided to take matters into their own hands. With one almighty kick, the kiss came to a quick halt when Lucy groaned and pulled back, grabbing hold of her bump to sooth the sore area.

"Jeez! Was that the baby kicking you? 'Cause even I felt that one!" Natsu looked surprised, amazed that their baby was so strong, at just five months, that he'd been able to feel the force of the kick against his own abdomen. "Is it still hurting, Luce? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, it just shocked me, that's all. They've never been quite that strong before." She chuckled, sitting herself up and straddling his hips as she looked down to her belly, gently caressing it with her thumb, "You were just trying to tell Mommy to move, weren't you?"

Balancing himself up onto his elbow, Natsu also placed his hand on top of Lucy's bump and smirked, "Or maybe, they were just tryin' to get their Mommy to say yes."

"Like you needed an answer!" Quirking her eyebrow up at his smirk, she shifted back a little as he sat himself up against the tree, laying Haru gently next to them while Lucy remained in place, "But you haven't actually asked me anything yet. Who knows what I could be agreeing to? This is you, after all."

The young man chuckled and grinned his thousand watt smile, knowing she'd catch him out eventually, "Alright, have it your way." The mischievous look on his face didn't disappear, even when he tried to take it seriously, "Will you marry me, Lucy?"

She returned his beaming smile with one of her own, glad to have heard it come from his mouth and nodded her head enthusiastically, "Of course, Natsu, the answer was always a yes."

"Good. Can I go back to kissing you now?" He asked, but didn't bother waiting for a reply and went to pull that enticing mouth back in for a third kiss, hoping this time there'd be no more interruptions in the forms of sparkling rings or unimpressed unborn babies.

But just as their lips were about to touch, Lucy paused ever so tantalisingly close to him and furrowed her brows, causing the boy to sigh impatiently, "What is it now?"

"Have you been holding on to that ring all day?" She enquired, only realising now that he must've got it from somewhere.

"Nah, not all day, just the party. I had to ask Happy to go and get it for me while you were distracted with Haru." Natsu explained, scratching the back of his head, "I was gonna do it myself, but stuff happened and then you suddenly showed up."

"Stuff… happened?" Now she was even more curious; what could've gone on in her absence?

"Yeah… them." He shivered still traumatised, pointing over to where Fairy Tail's guild hall stood, still alive and partying, and Lucy understood immediately just what he was referring to, giving her an insight into what she'd unsuspectingly walked in on earlier that day. "So, I had to change up my plans."

"Oh! Why didn't you just do it tomorrow instead? Rather than make it difficult for yourself." She asked, feeling a little smug when she saw the light go on in his brain.

She'd stumped him there. Always the brains of the operation, he couldn't believe he hadn't thought of that. He'd wanted to do it on a day that meant something to the both of them, but really, did it matter? The result would've been the same.

Noticing her cocky smirk and the playfulness in her eyes, he rose to the challenge, a fire in his belly, "Because, Miss Know-it-all, today was special, just like you said… And it wasn't difficult… I had it all under control…"

"Uh-huh…" She watched him become a little fidgety as if he weren't quite telling the truth and her smirk widened into a smug, toothy grin, "So you were just pretending to be scared when Erza was threatening you? I get it."

His eyes were sharp and intense, just like they were in battle, the one sided grin to boot as he bore into her playful expression, "Your playing with fire, Lucy…" His voice dangerous and brimming with cockiness.

"Then let it burn." She whispered close to his ear, barely able to get the words out before she found herself being forced onto her back, her hands held down above her head, with a fired up dragon slayer carefully leant over her form.

"You asked for it!" He growled, gulping down a large breath as he connected his mouth to the sensitive skin of her neck, torturing her senses with his loving but fierce embrace.

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ryukoishida · 3 years

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Qian Qiu/Thousand Autumns Fic: In which YWS experiences qi-deviation and SQ helps out.

Title: Down for You Fandom: Qian Qiu / Thousand Autumns Characters/Ships: YanShen Rating: NSFW Chapter: 1/1 Summary: [Post Canon] While experimenting with further improving Fundamental Records of Phoenix-Qilin, Yan Wushi suffered from sexually-driven qi deviation, which he tried to hide from Shen Qiao. When Shen Qiao finally realized what was wrong and offered to help, Yan Wushi felt conflicted. A/N: Another qi deviation fic? Yes. Let me join in the fun too please and thank.

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Yan Wushi hated asking for help.

He viewed dependence on someone else as a weakness – a weakness that he as one of the strongest martial arts masters under the heavens had no need for. Even since he was young, he thrived on being on his own: with no other pupils to distract him, and no overbearing teacher to instruct him point-by-point, he was able to concentrate on his training and meditation in his own pace and direction that had taken him higher on the path to greatness and strength in the martial arts realm.

To Yan Wushi, other people were either nuisances for him to flick off like pestering flies or rivals worthy of challenging; friends were merely an unnecessary burden.

Taking on two disciples during the last few decades had not changed his perspective on this. He took on Bian Yanmei and Yu Shengyan knowing that their independent personalities would work well with his hands-off teaching method. And thankfully, both of his disciples turned out to be more than capable to handle themselves and sect affairs when he wasn’t around.

In short, Yan Wushi hated asking for help. He never saw the need, and so perhaps had forgotten how.

Subsequently, when Shen Qiao asked him what was wrong with the slightest hint of worry between his brows, out of pure habit, Yan Wushi smiled and replied lightly, if not a little breathlessly from the itching heat that was very slowly inching from his solar plexus to the rest of his body through his bloodstreams, “nothing, my beloved.”

Even speaking such few words proved to be challenging; his throat protested with a parched, sweet burn that could only be satiated with the touch of one person, and one person only.

But Yan Wushi didn’t dare ask. He’d already asked too much of Shen Qiao by being here with him, standing beside him as if they were equals.

Shen Qiao’s frown deepened a little, barely noticeable. The answer clearly didn’t satisfy the sect leader of Xuan Du, yet Shen Qiao was a patient man and was not one to force answers out of Yan Wushi until he knew his husband was ready to divulge. Heaving a soft sigh and aiming a knowing look at the other man, Shen Qiao only pressed his lips into a tight line and lowered his gaze back to the scroll he’d been reading.

It wasn’t the first time he’d experienced qi deviation. During the years in his training to reach the higher levels of the Fundamental Records of Phoenix-Qilin, Yan Wushi had suffered countless instances and variations of his qi running erratic in his meridian network – icy needles prickling his bones, bursting flames scorching his flesh, paralysis rendering him completely vulnerable – and he’d overcame each and every single one of them without anyone’s interference or assistance.

The slow-burning heat like molten lava crawling slowly up and down his limbs and prickling just beneath his skin was nothing he’d ever experienced before, but Yan Wushi was certain he could get through this troublesome phase with a few more days of meditation and rewiring of his meridian network.

“You will tell me if there is something wrong, will you not?” Shen Qiao’s gaze didn’t move away from the text on his scroll, but his voice was quiet and genuine with concern.

“Of course, Ah-Qiao.”

Three more days of silently suffering the gradually increasing discomfort of feverish sensitivity and the progressively difficulty of ignoring the pulsing desire running wild within his body that no meditation nor long soaks in cold water could suppress, Yan Wushi was desperate.

He wouldn’t allow his disciples or other servants near him for the last few days, and to Shen Qiao’s surprise, he’d even turned his own husband away, muttering something along the lines of not wishing to pass whatever illness he had to his beloved partner. Given any other day, Shen Qiao would have left him be, but Yan Wushi’s behavior had been too uncharacteristic even for the man’s eccentric personality, and that was the moment when the sect leader of Xuan Du couldn’t pretend to be oblivious anymore.

“Yan-zongzhu…”

After knocking on the door of their shared bedchamber in Yuxu Pavilion and receiving no reply, Shen Qiao gingerly opened the door and stepped in. Night had already fallen hours ago and the candles were burning low, the orange glow of the flames flickering when the evening breeze slipped in through the gap of the open door before stilling again.

“Yan-zongzhu?” Shen Qiao tried again, tone soft, making his way to the side of the bed, where Yan Wushi was lying on his back, blankets kicked messily to the side and clothing haphazardly loosened in a state of disarray. His breathing was shallow and harsh, skin flushed and streaked with sweat, exposed chest rising and falling in an abnormal rate that made Shen Qiao rushed the last few steps to the bed and reached out for his companion’s wrist.

He rested two fingers against Yan Wushi’s pulse point, attempting to get a reading, but before he could accurately diagnose the man’s condition, Yan Wushi pulled his arm away with a groan.

“Ah-Qiao…” Yan Wushi croaked out, his voice much hoarser and lower than usual from how dry the inside of his mouth was, and he cleared his throat, eyes fluttering open and head turning slightly to look at Shen Qiao. His pupils were dilated so that only a thin ring of red-brown could be seen. “As much as I appreciate your concern, there really is nothing for you to worry about.”

“Yan Wushi!” Shen Qiao’s patience was running thin, and Yan Wushi could tell because he was calling him by his full name. With quick reflexes, Shen Qiao caught his husband’s wrist again, this time using a bit more force to keep him in place as he tried to read his pulse once more. The palpitation was strangely rapid and inconsistent, with a rhythm that he wasn’t familiar with from any medical books he’d read.

Brows gathering into a deeper frown and lips tightening into a straight line, Shen Qiao placed his palm on the other man’s forehead, and was shocked at the burning temperature of his skin there. He continued his examination, gently feeling his cheek with the back of his hand, and then slender fingers were on the side of his neck – a man’s most vulnerable point, easily grasped and snapped into pieces – but Yan Wushi only craved more, Shen Qiao’s cool fingertips and innocent touches merely serving to ignite whatever was flaring wildly inside his body.

Shen Qiao detected a change in Yan Wushi’s breathing, and simply deduced that as being his condition worsening. He quickened his examination, his hand briefly resting on Yan Wushi’s sternum before sliding lower to his solar plexus, all the while focusing his own qi to the center of his palm to see if he could at least alleviate some of the discomfort and ease the stranded qi into flowing again.

“Hah…!” Yan Wushi jerked as the qi from Shen Qiao’s palm entered through his skin and into his meridian network. It had felt… good. Too good, in fact, that he was afraid he might lose control of himself if he didn’t stop what his dear husband was doing right now.

In his current weakened state, Yan Wushi had no real strength to push back, and so he resorted to his infamous verbal skills. Lifting up his shuddering arm, he covered the back of Shen Qiao’s hand, which was still laying lightly across his husband’s stomach, with his own, interlaced their fingers together and pulled that pale jade hand towards his lips, murmuring against his warm skin in a low voice.

“Ah-Qiao… my good Ah-Qiao… do not be angry with me,” Yan Wushi was using his best impression of an overly-affectionate cat. His saccharine tone shouldn’t be so effective on Shen Qiao, but when it was paired with the teary-eyed gaze, flushed cheeks, and strands of star-white hair stuck to his temple, Shen Qiao felt the initial heat of his frustration simmered away until nothing but a soft smoldering tenderness was left.

Shen Qiao sighed but allowed Yan Wushi to keep holding his hand.

“Yan-lang, I am not angry, but I wish you would tell me right away when something like this happen. If you were to…” Shen Qiao’s mind flashed to the memory of Yan Wushi’s lifeless body lying on the cold, hard ground after his last fight with Hulugu, and he squeezed his eyes close, shaking his head viciously to tear himself away from that nightmarish image. “No, you cannot do that to me again. Promise me that you will not hide yourself like this next time you experience another instance of qi-deviation, or anything else.”

“Call me that again, and I will promise you anything you want.”

“Call you…?” Shen Qiao realized belatedly that he’d been addressing Yan Wushi with the pet name he only used sparingly during their most intimate moments, and he felt his face heating up from embarrassment. “Yan Wushi, this is a serious issue. If you continue to jest around as if your life is a joke —”

“How could I treat my own life as a joke when there is someone who care so deeply for me?” Yan Wushi lightly kissed the back of Shen Qiao’s hand before smiling up at him, the expression so indulgent and gentle – so unlike the usual bold and wolfish grin – that it took all of Shen Qiao’s self-control to not combust on the spot.

“Y-Yan-lang, that is beside the point.”

Despite his cold words, Shen Qiao conceded but quickly continued as if that little scene didn’t happen, “it seems like the flow of your qi is stuck somewhere along the Conception Vessel, probably between the Huiyin point and Qihai point, but it is better if we have a physician take a look—”

“Absolutely not,” Yan Wushi was adamant about this.

“Yan-lang, now is not the time to be headstrong,” Shen Qiao tried to persuade his partner. “Who knows what will happen if we do not act quickly to resolve the qi deviation?”

“This venerable one will not let anyone else touch me other than you.”

“I do not know how to help you…” Shen Qiao said, powerless against the demonic sovereign when he was acting so childishly, “perhaps with acupuncture…?”

“I do,” Yan Wushi said quickly, “and it definitely does not involve needles.”

He internally shuddered at the thought of those sharp, silver, pointy metal bits entering his acupressure points.

“All right,” Shen Qiao acquiesced with a resigned sigh, “will you at least tell me how, then?”

“It is quite simple, really,” one corner of Yan Wushi’s lips curved up into a slight grin, and Shen Qiao suddenly had a bad feeling about this, “I just need Ah-Qiao to enter me and climax inside me while at the same time stimulate a few specific acupressure points on my body with your qi.”

“… pardon me?”

It was solely thanks to Shen Qiao’s strict upbringing that he didn’t instantly slap Yan Wushi across the face and leave.

Rather than repeating himself – because he was sure that Shen Qiao had heard exactly what he’d said – Yan Wushi guided his husband’s hand from his mouth and southward, past his chest and stomach, and finally let it rest on his crotch, which, despite the layers of clothing, was quite obviously stirring in interest, as it had been for the past few days no matter how many times Yan Wushi had tried to resolve this problem by himself.

“Please, Ah-Qiao, will you not help your poor husband out? You know I do not beg easily, but for you…” Yan Wushi grinded up against Shen Qiao’s palm, and even though that slight friction was not nearly enough to quench his yearning, knowing that it was Shen Qiao who was touching him down there was sufficient to make the demonic sovereign bite his lower lip to dampen the whimper that was slipping out prettily. His body trembled with want, aching to be touched; he had to internally force his own frame to remain in place instead of springing up like a predator to trap Shen Qiao within his arms.

“Yan-lang, you know you never have to plead with me if you truly need help, right?” Shen Qiao was not used to seeing this side of Yan Wushi. Even as young as Xie Ling and as mellow as Ah-Yan were, none of his split personalities had ever acted like this. From Yan Wushi’s own perspective, this kind of behavior was unbecoming, a display of weakness, a sign of disgrace, and so he would never have allowed himself to fall into this pathetic state.

Shen Qiao’s fingers were twitching from the heat emanating from Yan Wushi’s erection, so it was a wonder he was able to inquire in a calm tone, “but are you certain that this is the only way to redirect your qi?”

“My good Ah-Qiao, please… I… I need you to touch me or I am literally going to die.”

Now Yan Wushi was being rather dramatic, and they both knew it. Even Shen Qiao was trying hard not to crack a smile at that as Yan Wushi continued his lament.

“Is that what you want? Do you want your husband to die from something as ridiculous as sexually-driven qi deviation?”

“For someone who is supposedly suffering, Yan-zongzhu sure runs his mouth too much,” Shen Qiao’s inhibition had melted away, and his worry seemed to have alleviated somewhat as well, after seeing that Yan Wushi was still capable of his melodramatic antics. “Shall I put your mouth to better use?”

Shen Qiao allowed himself to be pulled forward and down until their noses were nuzzling against each other’s, their breaths mingling hotly while the sect leader of Xuan Du ran his fingers back up to his exposed chest, splaying his hand against the patch of warm skin there. Feeling his husband’s heart thrumming beneath his fingertips, Shen Qiao’s own chest felt full of emotions that were impossible to put into words, so he didn’t try – not when he could communicate those feelings through his actions.

“And what does Shen-zhangjiao suggest?” Yan Wushi whispered, each word branding against the other man’s lips like the sweetest poison.

Shen Qiao wordlessly closed the distance between them, first with a chaste kiss of lips gently touching, and then almost instantly flared into a wet, messy clashing of mouths, teeth, and tongues initiated by Yan Wushi. Before long, however, even the demonic sovereign was feeling the radiating waves of heat and languor struck his muscles once more, and Shen Qiao was able to regain control by trapping Yan Wushi’s wrists to his sides while he counterattacked with biting kisses and soothing licks along the side of his neck.

Red and violet bruises bloomed like sweet fragrant alyssum blossoms where Shen Qiao’s mouth roamed, and the mere thought of the pure and virtuous Shen-zhangjiao of Xuan Du Sect marking him thus was making Yan Wushi harder than ever, and he made sure to let Shen Qiao know by releasing needy, broken moans of “Ah-Qiao” and “hurry”.

Soon enough, Shen Qiao had Yan Wushi’s robes removed and pants halfway tangled down his muscular legs, and while Shen Qiao had been imbued with an intoxicating sense of new-found confidence that had allowed him to initiate the kiss, yet as soon as he had laid bare Yan Wushi, his eyes roaming along the expanse of tanned skin and taut muscles aching to be touched and marred, the Daoist found himself hesitating once more.

He’d been kissing his way down his husband’s hipbone and the junction between his hip and thigh, and Shen Qiao could smell the musk of Yan Wushi’s arousal, which only served to make his cheeks heat up more. He froze at the sight of his husband’s swollen and dripping cock.

“You know…” Shen Qiao started, gaze downcast, “I have never done this before, so let me know if you feel any discomfort or pain…”

As if Yan Wushi needed that reminder.

He’d been trying so hard to maintain the last thread of self-control he had, too, and one innocent comment from his dear husband had completely shattered what sanity remained inside of him.

“My good Ah-Qiao,” Yan Wushi breathed out, reaching for the other man’s hands, and their fingers interlaced as if it was the most natural thing in the world, “no matter what you do to me, I am certain that I will have nothing but praises for you.”

Shen Qiao shook his head once and laughed softly, the sound and his expression so tender that Yan Wushi couldn’t help but squeeze his fingers tighter before guiding those same calloused hands to where Yan Wushi needed him to touch.

His cock was slick and hot – almost abnormally so, which Shen Qiao supposed made sense since this was a symptom of qi deviation – but it didn’t diminish the fact that it was big, the shine of pre-cum drooling from the tip simultaneously tempting and intimidating.

Shen Qiao swallowed at the sight despite Yan Wushi’s generous words, and tentatively, he licked the tip and contemplated the responsive shudder that ran up Yan Wushi’s spine.

A good sign, Shen Qiao mused quietly to himself, and then he did it again – small, experimental flicks of his tongue against the velvety skin of the head as if he was tasting a new flavor of candy. Shen Qiao decided he rather liked it, especially the interesting reactions his gesture seemed to be kindling in Yan Wushi, the way he hissed impatiently and tangling his fingers into Shen Qiao’s hair, tugging to beg wordlessly.

Encouraged by his husband’s response, Shen Qiao took it a step further, and envelope the entire head into the moist cavern of his mouth, first delicately wrapping his lips around the tip and taking care to not let his teeth scrape against the sensitive skin there, then slowly swallowing Yan Wushi centimeter by centimeter until he found it hard to breath and his jaw began to ach.

“Gods, Ah-Qiao, you are going to be the death of me…” Yan Wushi murmured shakily, his hand cradling the back of Shen Qiao’s head gently while fingers idly played with his frost green hair ribbon. The cold silk felt like cooling water in the springtime against his fingertips, and it reminded Yan Wushi of that one night when he used that exact hair ribbon to tie Shen Qiao’s wrists while he had his way with him.

The memories didn’t serve him well, for a stream of unfathomable heat and prickling desire blazed down his meridian network and made his cock twitch in Shen Qiao’s mouth.

Shen Qiao’s eyes flickered up to check on his husband, and noticed that Yan Wushi had one arm thrown across his face in an attempt to muffle his moans. His hazel eyes darkened, and he resumed to sucking; where his mouth couldn’t reach, Shen Qiao made use of his hand at the base, pumping in time with the movement of his mouth and tongue and sliding wetly up and down Yan Wushi’s length.

Feeling his thighs beginning to shake at the anticipation of release, Shen Qiao pulled up but his hand didn’t let up its pace. He peppered contrastingly soft kisses along the inside of Yan Wushi’s thigh while his hand tugged in a tempo that was verging on brutal, but that was exactly what Yan Wushi needed.

It didn’t take long for him to climax into Shen Qiao’s hand with a choked groan, and strands of white landed on his own abdomen as well as on his husband’s still clean and meticulous robes.

“W-was that all right?” Shen Qiao asked, uncertainty tinting his hoarse whisper as he climbed back up to look at Yan Wushi properly. He was about to measure the man’s pulse again when he saw tear streaks down Yan Wushi’s cheeks. Heart seized up in a panic, he quickly dabbed the wetness away with his sleeve, a trail of apologies ready on his tongue.

Yan Wushi caught his forearm and planted a small kiss on the inside of his wrist.

“It was more than all right,” Yan Wushi assured him with a languid smile, releasing Shen Qiao’s hand and raising his arm up to brush his thumb against the other man’s red and abused lower lip, the colour so mesmerizing that he couldn’t help but pull Shen Qiao down for a brief but dirty, open-mouthed kiss before murmuring against his ear once they both ran out of air, “in fact, I think I am already starting to feel better, but you know this husband needs more, right?”

Shen Qiao nodded, biting his lip. After easing off of Yan Wushi’s body, he shrugged off his soiled outer robe and moved to retrieve the ceramic vial that he knew his husband kept inside a hidden compartment by the side of their bed. He fumbled with the stopper until it popped out, and he shakily poured out a significant amount of carrageenan extract into his hand.

The texture of it was a little off-putting – a sticky gel-like consistency that reminded him of… another kind of bodily fluid – but he wanted to ensure that he wouldn’t hurt Yan Wushi in the process. After all, Shen Qiao himself wasn’t very experienced, and though this whole ordeal was nothing but a medical treatment, the sect leader of Xuan Du still needed to ensure that Yan Wushi would not be wounded further.

“You will tell me if I am hurting you, will you not?”

The concern in his eyes was genuine. Everything about Shen Qiao was genuine, and Yan Wushi used to think this kind of naturally honest nature was the trait of an absolute fool, yet here he was, in love with a so-called fool.

Maybe he was the one who’d become a fool after all this time.

He didn’t have enough time to contemplate any further than that, because Shen Qiao was kissing him on the mouth when he didn’t answer.

“Yan-lang?”

Yan Wushi couldn’t find it in himself to tease his husband this time, so with equal sincerity, he said, “I will, Ah-Qiao.”

“Good,” Shen Qiao nodded with a small satisfied smile.

With his fingers slicked up with lubricant, Shen Qiao once again returned his attention to his present task. He knelt between Yan Wushi’s legs, which he had opened up slightly wider to more easily accommodate his partner, and carefully slipped the tip of his middle finger into Yan Wushi’s puckered hole.

Unaccustomed to the strange sensation down there, Yan Wushi instinctively wanted to escape from the touch by closing his legs together, but Shen Qiao steadied him with his other hand by firmly pushing against his thigh while pushing his finger further in until the entire digit was swallowed up by the warm tightness.

“Nnng… Ah-Qiao… it feels odd…” Yan Wushi exhaled with a tremulous murmur.

“Odd in a good way or in a bad way?” Shen Qiao asked, stilling his motion and lifting his gaze back up to Yan Wushi’s face to observe his expression.

“Undetermined,” Yan Wushi decided, letting his eyes fall close and breathing out to try to relax his body. The unyielding roiling waves of gnawing desire had subsided a little after he’d climaxed earlier, but with his qi still stuck, that unwelcoming stream of energy was beginning to gather at the pit of his stomach all too soon, causing his cock to stir again even though he hadn’t been touched there yet.

“Hm,” Shen Qiao only hummed thoughtfully. He opted to continue for now.

He pumped his finger in and out a few times to allow Yan Wushi to get used to the sensation before he increased the pace and added a second finger, crooking them in a shallow angle to find the correct acupressure points. To Shen Qiao’s delight, the gesture caused Yan Wushi’s breathing to quicken, his chest rising and falling in tormented groans. His cock lengthened and swelled with blood, and was soon back to its full strength.

“Haaah… Ah-Qiao, keep going…”

The fingering had felt good – so damn good – even though Shen Qiao claimed that he was inexperienced. He must have picked up some skills from Yan Wushi during their previous intimate nights, for after the early moment of embarrassment and hesitation, the way he manipulated Yan Wushi’s body with his slender and calloused fingers had become proficient and deadly.

“I am going to start transferring my qi through your acupoints starting from the Qugu point,” Shen Qiao said, trying to tear his eyes away from Yan Wushi’s debauched expression – silvery-white and ink-black hair sticking to his sweat-slicked skin, eyes squeezed close, head craned back to expose the strong line of his throat, and the occasional moans slipping past his throat – but as he shifted his gaze back to where his fingers were, still buried deep within Yan Wushi’s hole, which had turned dusty pink and glistening from the extract around the ridge, Shen Qiao was starting to question his ability to carry on this operation.

“W-what?”

The feverish desire had reached its new height so that Yan Wushi was unable to think clearly. He was only vaguely aware that Shen Qiao said something and that he needed something much bigger and thicker to fill the void that was verging on swallowing his whole being.

“Never mind,” Shen Qiao said and took a deep breath to regain focus. With attentive eyes and precise execution, Shen Qiao directed the qi inside of his own body so that it flowed in a gradual stream towards the tips of his middle and ring fingers; when he grazed upwards, he aimed the flow of qi to the Qugu point, which was physically the closest to where his fingertips were.

From there, Shen Qiao pushed his qi forward, testing the give of the entire trail of Conception Vessel before forcing it through to the next acupoint, up Zhongji and pierced through to Guanyuan.

“Yan-lang, how do you feel?”

Yan Wushi had been chillingly quiet since Shen Qiao had started transferring his own qi into his husband’s body, and his abnormal silence made the Daoist thought that maybe the demonic sovereign was rejecting his qi due to their different martial arts origins.

“Ah-Qiao…” he gasped, eyes hooded and the blood-red of his irises just a thin ring from his fully dilated pupils, “too… too much…”

Shen Qiao’s heart thudded against his ribcage at how wrecked Yan Wushi sounded. He’d never seen the man like this, even when he was lost in the deepest end of pleasure, and somewhere buried, hidden, and shaped by years of Daoist teachings and morals was an instinctive part of Shen Qiao that had woken up from seeing this vulnerable, intimate side of the usually self-assured and strong Yan Wushi, the cold, ruthless, selfish leader of Huan Yue Sect.

“Yan-lang,” Shen Qiao caressed his husband’s cheek in comfort, wiping away a stray tear that’d escaped his eyes, “we are almost there, just hold on for Ah-Qiao’s sake. Will you do that for me?”

Yan Wushi closed his eyes and shook his head, and his body seemed to suddenly stop being pliant as well.

Shen Qiao’s qi couldn’t advance further; if he kept forcing it, he might risk injuring the rest of Yan Wushi’s meridian system, and that was the last thing Shen Qiao wanted.

“All right, all right,” Shen Qiao cooed, gently taking his fingers out.

Yan Wushi sighed out with a shuddering breath, half in relief and half in lament at the dizzying empty feeling.

If this method didn’t work, he might need to find another way. Shen Qiao was nothing if not resourceful.

“Ah-Qiao, I want you…” Yan Wushi grasped Shen Qiao’s right hand and placed it pointedly against his husband’s clothed arousal, the fabric of which had already been darkened from spots of precum.

“!”

Shen Qiao shuddered when Yan Wushi weakly squeezed his cock through his trousers.

Well, Yan Wushi never had been one to beat around the bush, so Shen Qiao didn’t know what he’d been expecting.

“I —” Shen Qiao paused. Verbally expressing his affection for his husband still didn’t come easily to him, but there were rare moments like this that he found it to be the simplest, most natural thing to do. “I want you, too, Yan-lang.”

The candles were burning dangerously low, and a few had already extinguished, casting the room deeper into the night.

After removing the rest of his clothing, Shen Qiao folded the blanket into a make-shift cushion and placed it under his partner’s lower back before settling back between Yan Wushi’s legs. With one hand wrapped around Yan Wushi’s waist to steady him and the other gently parting the two mounds of firm muscles to reveal the slightly swollen hole, Shen Qiao lined himself up.

All this time, he’d been so focused on mending Yan Wushi’s meridian network that he’d been neglecting his own desire, and now that it’d been freed from the restraint of his undergarment, it was clear that Shen Qiao had been holding back.

He started slow – for both Yan Wushi and his own sanity.

The tip went in easily enough from the ample preparation and Shen Qiao’s own precum lubricating the first part of the entry. The velvet heat that instantly surrounded him was intoxicating, and if Shen Qiao had less self-control, he’d have immediately slammed himself in as deep and hard as he could, but in the end, he managed to reign in that flaring craving that was slowly but surely burning his logic and patience into ashes.

Resisting the urge to thrust all the way in took all of Shen Qiao’s willpower; his knuckles turned white from how hard he was grasping onto Yan Wushi’s hips, which would surely leave bruises that the demonic sovereign would later smugly show his embarrassed husband.

Little by little, Shen Qiao pushed himself into that addictive and delicious heat, all the time still observing for any ailing changes in Yan Wushi’s body. If anything, it seemed having Shen Qiao slowly fucking himself into him only made him more vocal.

“D-do not stop, please… feels good…” Yan Wushi wasn’t helping a bit as he wrapped his legs tightly around Shen Qiao’s waist, imploring for him to go deeper.

Seeing that he wasn’t causing his partner any discomfort, Shen Qiao steeled himself and plunged all the way in until he was fully sheathed. He panted harshly into Yan Wushi’s mouth, who slipped his tongue sloppily into the offered mouth and teased Shen Qiao with filthy kisses that had them both breathing hard.

Shen Qiao finally lost that last strand of calm composure. Foreheads touching, eyes clouded by ravenous hunger, and forearms caging Yan Wushi’s yearning body between his arms, Shen Qiao pulled out slightly and thrusted back in, with enough force to make Yan Wushi gasp and scrambling for purchase.

He did it again and again, skin slapping against skin, the sound seeming to resonate within the walls of their sacred bedchamber, each time more urgent and more fervent than the last.

“Mnnn…. Fuck, Ah-Qiao feels so good inside me…”

“Haah… ah… do you feel no shame, Yan-zongzhu?” Shen Qiao nuzzled the side of Yan Wushi’s neck and kissed him roughly there, leaving more small bruises and teeth marks that wouldn’t fade for days.

“Aww… what happened to calling me ‘Yan-lang’?” Yan Wushi chuckled, placing one hand against the back of Shen Qiao’s head. A soft tug on the ribbon loosened the elegant twist of hair that cascaded over Shen Qiao’s pale shoulders like ink splashing on canvas. “Did I perhaps unknowingly anger Ah-Qiao?”

Shen Qiao paused, leaving only the tip of his cock inside his partner, which instantly drove Yan Wushi to buckle his hips upward in a sorry endeavor to tempt Shen Qiao into moving. He gave Yan Wushi a pointed glare, though the intended effect was dampened by the blush spreading from his cheeks down to his neck and chest and the fact that he was, in fact, fucking Yan Wushi into their bed.

“You know what you did,” Shen Qiao mumbled, finding himself impossible to be truly mad at him in this current situation.

“Hmm…” Yan Wushi scattered soft kisses on the other man’s forehead, eyelids, the bridge of his nose, and finally licking the shell of his ear, he continued with a grin, “can it be that Ah-Qiao is flustered by what I said?”

“There is no need for you to be using such foul and explicit language,” Shen Qiao argued, turning his head away, but it only gave Yan Wushi the perfect angle to kiss down his neck and nibble his collarbone.

“Oh, but there is a need,” Yan Wushi countered, tightening his legs around Shen Qiao’s waist so that he was dragged back into where Yan Wushi needed him to be. The fullness that had at first felt overwhelming was now a welcoming sensation, and he could feel the few acupoints that Shen Qiao had sent his qi through had been cleared, but there were still two spots that he knew needed to be unclogged before his own torrent of qi could flow smoothly and safely. “I need to tell Ah-Qiao how well he had been treating this husband, do I not? And I cannot find the adequate language unless I am using those exact words. Is there something wrong with that? Does Ah-Qiao not like it when I give you compliments?”

“I-It is not like that!”

There was no use having a proper discussion with Yan Wushi’s twisted sense of logic, so Shen Qiao didn’t try to. Instead, he returned to his previous act, except this time he was thrusting in with more force and fire, almost like he was wordlessly taking his own personal vengeance against Yan Wushi’s body.

“Haaah… Ah-Qiao!” Yan Wushi groaned, casting a half-hearted accusatory glare at the other man when Shen Qiao hit the spot that made him see stars and his hole contract around his husband’s length. “… just because… just because you cannot see yourself winning the argument against this venerable one does not mean you should stoop to such low m— nnnng!” Distracted by the sudden onslaught of flickering flames licking down his back and in the pit of his stomach, Yan Wushi hadn’t noticed the fingers placed strategically across his abdomen until he felt a hot stream of foreign qi invaded his meridian network – just as Shen Qiao’s cock was sweetly, torturously invading his inside.

The pleasure that bloomed and erupted from the coil seated deep within him was blinding; it was wonderful and terrifying, devastating yet cherished. Yan Wushi hardly noticed Shen Qiao’s climax when he was still convulsing and quivering from his own release; thick ropes of milky white cum landed and splattered messily on his own chest and tainted Shen Qiao’s unmarred skin.

His mind was blissfully blank for a brief moment while he waited for Shen Qiao to come down from his high. He sensed more than knew that he was filled to the brim with his husband’s seed, and that the last acupoints had been broached to allow his qi to flow effortlessly again.

The last candle burned out, and the room sank into complete darkness except for the hint of watery light from the crescent moon outside.

“Yan-lang?” Shen Qiao wanted to pull out but an arm thrown carelessly around his lower back stopped him from doing so. He heaved a soft sigh but remained in Yan Wushi’s embrace, laying his head against his husband’s chest despite the sticky, sweaty mess they’d made of each other.

“Hmm?” his voice rumbled in the dark, like the earth trembling beneath Shen Qiao’s feet, the sound irritatingly lackadaisical yet strangely kept his heart and mind at peace.

“Your meridian network…?”

“Thanks to Ah-Qiao’s magnificent medical skills, I believe my qi deviation has been treated and my meridian network perfectly restored,” Yan Wushi said, playing with a strand of Shen Qiao’s hair.

Shen Qiao exhaled in relief.

“Though to be certain that it is entirely healed, we might need to have the same treatment performed again, under Shen-zhangjiao’s skillful practice, of course.”

“Yan Wushi!”

Shen Qiao slapped him on the bicep, which only made Yan Wushi snicker harder.

When his laughter finally died down, and he could hear Shen Qiao’s breathing mellowing, Yan Wushi combed his fingers soothingly through his husband’s slightly tangled locks and murmured against the crown of his head.

“Shen Qiao.”

“Hmm?” he mumbled sleepily.

“Ah-Qiao.”

Shen Qiao opened his eyes blearily and pushed himself up just enough to look at Yan Wushi, who was gazing at him with bright eyes and a tender smile.

“Yes?”

A bit of his lucidity returned at the sight of Yan Wushi’s expression.

“I promise you,” Yan Wushi held onto Shen Qiao’s hand and placed a kiss on the back of it, “from this day on, I promise that no matter what kind of problems I may encounter, Ah-Qiao will be the first to know. In return, will you promise to stay by this venerable one’s side no matter what may become of me?”

“Silly Yan-lang,” Shen Qiao pecked him lightly on the forehead before making himself comfortable on Yan Wushi’s chest again, “always.”

#thousand autumns #qian qiu #yanshen #shan he jian xin #yan wushi #shen qiao #bowie's crappy writing

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cosmiclatte28 · 3 years

Text

Maniac (Taeyong x you, Yuta)

warning : mention of Taeyong being a maniac and mad scientist.

It’s pure fictional and no these are nothing real and Taeyong is not like that. Please just read this for fun :) enjoy!!

The sparks of fire from connecting wires, constant buzzing noise from the generator in the dim room, and the wet shirt drenched in sweat didn't stop the young scientist in finishing his biggest project.

Grunting when his sweat falls on his hand and causes the screwdriver he held falls, he tosses them to the table and walks away to take off his shirts. He wipes his sweaty face and body with a towel he has in his garage and gulps the last volume of water.

Right in time when he finishes his water, a man enters the room with two cold beer and a plate of sandwich

"Take some break Taeyong," the man with a hint of Japanese accent walks to sit beside the bare-chested man with red hair.

Taeyong smiles a little when he sees the blonde Japanese guy calmly makes himself comfortable sitting beside him.

"Your accent is getting better." Taeyong wipes his hands to the towel and chugs on the cold drink Yuta brought.

Yuta chuckles "Thanks, I practice hard like you told me to." He looks around and sees the project Taeyong is working on

"How is it?"

Taeyong sighs "I cannot connect the last wire and burnt some of the metal pieces."

Yuta stands to examine the thing closely, he's Taeyong's best partner when it comes to robotic and he's been a lot of help in designing things.

"Let me try, my hands might be handier." Yuta focuses his eyes on the wires and opens a palm waiting for Taeyong to toss the tool he needs.

Taeyong just tosses the connector and lay down on the sofa for a moment he needs to rest his eyes.

"Tae!" Yuta's happy voice wakes him up. Taeyong scurries to his side and smiles when Yuta made the last wire connected.

"Thank you!" He pats Yuta's back several time as his eyes scan through the metal pieces.

"What next?" Yuta also sounds excited and interested in seeing Taeyong finish this project successfully.

"I just need to put in this programmed chip." Taeyong explains as he bites his lip when pushing the microchip into the socket.

The two young men hold their breath and almost forgot how to breathe when the metal piece standing in front of them opens their eyes.

"YOU DID IT!!!" Yuta hugs Taeyong tightly and even carries him and make one spin to congratulate his best friend's hard work.

Taeyong cannot hide his happy tears "Thank you Yuta! It's also thanks to your help!"

He did it, Lee Taeyong, 27 years old, made his first project comes to life.

He built an artificial intelligent that resembles human up to 90%. He graduated with a computer degree and some gifted robotic skills and with the help of Yuta, his father introduced Yuta to him before he graduated.

Taeyong shared a house with Yuta and felt comfortable enough to tell Yuta about his project, Taeyong built the garage to be his workshop and Yuta as his project assistant.

Yuta designed the human robot, according to Taeyong's description and requests. Yuta worked so hard on making the outer body of the AI to look like human and he did not disappoint Taeyong when one day Taeyong woke up to a pretty AI suite.

"You're crazy!" Taeyong said when he first touches the 'skin' of the robot Yuta worked on for a month.

Yuta shook his head "I just found the best materials! This looks super pretty because your design in first place is already breath-taking. Plus I know what I want more." Yuta tapped his shoulder and gave it a light squeeze "I know it's hard for you Tae, but if your wish is to make an AI based on (y/n), I promise I'll support you, besides I am happy to get a new friend." There’s something fishy on the way Yuta pronounced new

Taeyong hugged Yuta for his gentle words. “You’re always my friend and I always let you know my other friends too, what do you mean?”

Yuta chcukles “I mean the one like me. I finally have an artificial intelligent friend Tae.”

Taeyong looks into Yuta’s eyes and memories come back flooding his minds.

Yes, Taeyong had just lost the love of his life. He met you when he was a bachelor and he asked you out on your second year. You dated and graduated together only for you to tell him the news that you're terminally ill. Taeyong was shocked and surprised, he asked you why you never told him. And as cliché as it sounds, you told him "It's for the best."

Taeyong recorded all of the things you do with him, he secretly noted down everything you liked to do. By the time you left him forever, Taeyong already has the most important things he loves from you.

It took him a year to finally feel less sad than before (though still sad).

He told Yuta his idea of making an AI to replace you because he felt so empty and Yuta is always in for things to make Tae happy again.

For one-year Taeyong started working on the program, then to the metal bones and with Yuta's help he got the outer design perfect like you. There are so many trials and errors and Taeyong ever feels like giving up, but Yuta is always there to cheer him up and telling Taeyong it is okay to rest and when he wants to continue Yuta will help. That makes Taeyong continues his project until today.

Standing before him is a 98% copy of you. Physically this is like you, with no organs but he programmed you to have feelings and inputted memories from your dates with him. He tried his best to make the old (y/n) into this shell of metals and wires and silicone.

Right now, the AI he's working so hard for is reciting the greetings Taeyong programmed and Taeyong smiles when he heard your voice there. Well he had recorded some phrases of yours he loves and put it in the program.

“I am going to take a good care of her and make sure she is comfortable!” Yuta happily takes over the computer program and monitors your new health.

Taeyong takes a step back to sit on his sofa. There he sees Yuta and you, trying to communicate with one another. Taeyong smiles sadly when he realizes all of his life, he’s been surrounded by artificial things. His father was a famous smart inventor and he made Yuta, the first AI designed to take care of Taeyong, make him happy and make sure he gets all the helps he needed. Yuta was built perfectly for Taeyong’s father’s generation, though in some things like language his dad set Yuta to speak Japanese so Taeyong can practice his Japanese. After his father died of old age, Taeyong taught Yuta Korean, and updated some of his program. Now Yuta was programmed more like a friend rather than a guardian figure. Yuta doesn’t look like a robot, some of Taeyong’s bestfriend wouldn’t know if Taeyong did not tell them.

Yuta has been the greatest friend he has, although he is artificial he is capable of feeling and showing emotions.

Taeyong chuckles when his mind comes back to the present. Beside him, you sit while resting your head on his shoulder, the same way you always did back then. He caresses your hair and whispers, “I love you (y/n), to the point where I became crazy.”

That night Taeyong can finally sleep in peace when he knows he has you back right beside him, sleeping safe and sound.

“I am sorry honey if I turned into a maniac. But I, Lee Taeyong, am your maniac.” His eyes glint in the dark and he pulls over the blanket over his head.

As mad as a scientist can get, when one has their desired goal they won’t stop until they get it.

Yuta sits back on his private room. He plugs his charging battery into the socket and sits down while his hand reaches out for a pen and a paper. Carefully Yuta notes down the things that happens to Taeyong today. He notes how Taeyong finished his project, he notes how he is also happy to see (y/n) back in the form of an AI and Yuta cannot wait to have some time alone to tell (y/n) the things she needs to know living as AI. Yuta places the paper into a neat folder coded by years. He puts it back to the shelf next to four other years. Taeyong’s dad programmed Yuta to always make daily entries of what happens to his son, and Yuta will never forget that obligation. Taeyong never know about this, but Yuta’s sure one day Taeyong will see just how much things he had done in this life that bring a lot of happiness to others and to Yuta.

Yuta knows Taeyong looks like a mad scientist, a maniac, but for his entire life Yuta has only known these types of people as his family. The inventor and Taeyong. Yuta just learn about other people’s life that is different than his when Taeyong’s friends come to visit.

All in all, Yuta is glad his young master, or best friend is now happy with the love of his life. Carefully Yuta glances to his small monitor in his hand, it is the countdown to the day he will be shut down. He was programmed that when Taeyong reached the biggest goal he has, and when he got a new replacement Yuta might be shut down permanently. Taeyong doesn’t have to know this, Yuta saw how hard it for Taeyong was to let you go when he knows how many days were left.

The young AI investigates his screen, 72:00:00 and the countdown started.

Yuta smiles when he peeks his head over to see his best friend already finding his happiness back. Right, 72 hours should be enough for Yuta to make sure (y/n) knows everything she needs to know about Taeyong.

He’s glad at least he can finish his goal, shutting down is not something Yuta’s afraid of. He just wants Taeyong to be happy and he’ll rest forever in peace.

Little did Yuta know, Taeyong will realize about the countdown and he will find a way to stop it.

end

how is it? Did you see it coming that Yuta is an AI too? I had this crazy plot just in the crazy hours before I can sleep... I am sorry if this is messy, it’s done in a rush when I had the inspiration and my brain was working well.

Please look forward to the 12 days of Christmas fanfic project!! I finished everything and you’ll be able to read it starting from 26 Dec!

have a nice holiday!!

#taeyong x you #taeyong x reader #taeyong x y/n #taeyong x yuta #yuta x taeyong #yuta x reader #taeyong au #yuta au #taeyong angst #taeyong fluff #taeyong imagines #taeyong scenarios #yuta imagines #yuta scenarios #taeyong nct #nakamoto yuta #nct imagines #nct aus #nct masterlist

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selenityshiroiml · 3 years

Text

So...I’ve seen somewhere that, at some point, Chat Noir will not be a part of the show for a bit. And I started to think of a scenario where it would work, but I’m not a massive fic writer and all my ideas are building up into a huge plot but with no major desire to write it. So...massive post-Gabriel/Hawkmoth story idea under the cut

So, I had the idea that the miraculous crew (all reunited for the big event) would find out Gabriel was Hawkmoth and quickly work to take him out. And, yeah, Chat Noir was a bit off during the take down but at least they all stopped Gabriel and got him and Nathalie arrested and they got back the Peacock Miraculous (but the Butterfly got knocked off and is still missing because Butterfly User Lila).

And the crew are all ‘oh shit...what about poor Adrien (who none of us know personally of course) he wasn’t here at the mansion when we ruined his life so we should all split up and go look for him’

(Nino finds him crying on his doorstep)

But then the next day Adrien kind of closes off and goes off radar for a bit because comatose Emilie was found and he’s now splitting time between the hospital and trying to make sure Agreste Fashion doesn’t tank and take all it’s innocent employees with it and a hotel because he is not going back to that mansion. And all his friends are giving him space because they love him and know he’s gone through a lot with his dad and psudo-stepmom being magical terrorists. And maybe they also don’t want to push because they also feel a little guilty for slapping the cuffs on.

In the meantime Chat Noir and Ladybug are still looking for the missing Butterfly but Chat is still off and he asks Ladybug if he can take some time for personal reasons. And Ladybug is all ‘what??? is something wrong?’ and he tells her that a family member is has been ill for a long time and they might need to be transferred for specialist medical treatment. But he’s being sufficiently vague enough that Ladybug assumes he’s been taking care of a family member with cancer or something and ‘OMG how long has he been struggling, was this happening before Hawkmoth??? Did he put off telling her or asking to take time off because he was worried about leaving her alone to deal with the akumas and everything???’

So she’s all ‘of course you can take some time you are my friend and partner and I care about you and I know you’ll be back as soon as you can and I hope everything goes well in your real life’

But what’s really happening is that the Guardian Temple has been in contact with Adrien and are all ‘we can help heal your mother...come to Tibet’ and Adrien is all ‘well...I can’t take the Black Cat Miraculous to Tibet with me because Ladybug might need it to protect her’ so he sends Plagg off with the ring and tells him to take it back to the Guardian (he isn’t truly renouncing it, he’s just being a selfless moron).

Of course, Marinette gets home from school and finds Plagg hissing and spitting at all the Kwami in her room and she realises Plagg is there with the ring and they are both so angry and upset at Chat Noir because ‘how fucking dare he’ and she refuses to put the ring away and no way in HELL is anyone else wearing it. She puts it on a cord around her neck and keeps it under her shirt at all times.

And then a few days later Adrien (who has slowly started messaging his friends back and thanking them for their support) shows up at school to say goodbye for a bit because he’s taking his mother to a specialist in China and everyone is all sad face but hopes everything goes well. (and obviously no one thinks twice about the fact that Adrien is leaving Paris not long after Chat Noir stopped appearing) And Tikki is shoving cheese scones into Plagg’s mouth whilst they hide in Marinette’s bag because she’s afraid he’s gonna shout out for his kitten before he drives off.

But then he’s gone and Marinette misses Chat Noir like anything and she misses Adrien and Alya is all ‘sooooo...can we borrow the ring?’ and Marinette and Plagg are both ‘OVER MY DEAD BODY’.

And then at some point a weird Miraculous user turns up with another strange user acting as a Mandarin-French interpreter and they ask Ladybug for the Peacock to heal Emilie Agreste. And she is all ‘wt actual fuck???’ and is all ‘let me think about it’ because Plagg is hidden in her hair whispering ‘you can trust them...especially the young one’ and she says to come back the next night and she’ll give her answer.

So she does the only thing she can think of to get answers as to why the Peacock might help Emilie. She sneaks into jail and asks Gabriel. And Gabriel, who has had time to think about his defeat and add 2 and 2 together to make 4 has realised that she is Marinette (he’s also worked out that Chat Noir is his son but he’s keeping quiet) and is open with her about how Emilie fell into a coma because of the Peacock and that, yes, it might be used to help her recover but he has no idea how. He also asks pointed questions about Sentimonsters and how she treated the Ladybug Sentimonster as a living being because maybe there might be a repercussion you aren’t willing to be responsible for.

Ladybug agrees to give the Peacock Miraculous to the Guardian Temple representatives on the promise that it is returned to her via Adrien and Emilie Agreste when they return, safe and well, to Paris.

In the meantime the Adrien-less plot ticks away with new Akuma victims showing up (showing that some asshole really DOES have the butterfly) but the motives seem to be less ‘bring me their miraculous’ and more ‘fuck everyone in Paris because i’m angry and upset because no one believes in me or gives me the attention i want’ because fucking Lila.

And at one point Nino, Alya and Marinette go and check out apartments on behalf of Adrien who has shortlisted places from China but wants his friends to check them out physically for him because he trusts them (and they are all ‘oh shit...this is an apartment but it’s like three times the size of all our places combined why is our friend so rich...) because I think that would be cute.

Until one day the news breaks out that Nathalie has disappeared in jail and all that is left is a feather, mostly white but with tints of blue at the edges. Marinette is all ‘shit...that’s an amok thing’ and manages to convince the police to give Ladybug the feather. She purifies the feather and on the otherside of the planet Emilie Agreste wakes up.

(Because Nathalie was a sentimonster that critically ill Emilie made and was filled with her desire to look after her husband and son and the reason why Gabriel didn’t try to destroy Nathalie to help Emilie is because by the time he realised what Nathalie was she was already a real person in his eyes, like the Ladybug Sentimonster, and also she was a part of Emilie and he didn’t want to risk destroying her if it wouldn’t help because she was all he had of his wife and he’s actually sad that Nathalie might be gone, even if it means Emilie wakes)

And then Adrien comes home and Emilie is still weak but hey at least she is there and she pays attention to her son which is more than Gabriel ever did (and it’s kind of weird that she seems to know things that only Nathalie knew...it’s like she saw her son grow up as if watching a movie).

And then Adrien sneaks up on Ladybug whilst she’s out and about (because he knows all her normal patrol spots) in order to return the Peacock. And Ladybug has spent the last while swearing to Plagg that when Chat comes back she is going to say fuck it to the hidden identities because she is going to shove the ring back on his damned finger herself and never let him take it off again. So Plagg has no qualms about zooming out of Ladybug’s hair and smooshing straight into Adrien’s face screaming ‘IF YOU EVER LEAVE ME AGAIN I WILL COUGH UP A CAMEMBERT FLAVOURED HAIRBALL DIRECTLY INTO YOUR MOUTH YOU RAT BASTARD’

And that isn’t how Marinette or Adrien expected the reveal to go but whatever.

(alternatively they could hold out on the reveal and just have a cute Ladrien scene of Adrien thanking Ladybug for helping his mother heal whilst she is all awkwardly all ‘sorry I got your father arrested’ and then when Marinette gets home Plagg is all ‘wow...will you look at the time, I think Chat Noir might be mysteriously ready for me to take my ring back to him’ and then he flies off and two days later Ladybug finds Chat Noir on top of the Montparnasse Tower and she tackle hugs him off the side of the building and they have to quickly stop each other from falling to their deaths via yoyo and staff and they end up tangled together whilst ugly crying because they missed each other SOOOOOO MUCH)

#ml speculation #ladynoir #i have actually written certain scenes of this #but i know it would take me so long to write the whole thing that the show would joss it before i completed it #but i genuinely believe something must be up with emilie and nathalie #and also that there was a reason we saw a sentimonster being treated like a real person worth having their own existance #mostly i want marinette and plagg mourning adrien being gone together #marinette alternating between 'i miss the love of my life' and 'i miss my kitty' and in a sadness spiral #sobbing into their icecream whilst tikki and alya are all 'there there'#and no one (other than tikki plagg and gabriel) realising that chat and adrien are the SAME PERSON #even though they mysteriously left at the same time

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mdelpin · 3 years

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Male Order Bride - Chapter 2

AO3 | Prev: Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Next: Ch 3

Chapter 2

Gray examined the crowd of people, attempting to figure out what they were doing there. There were a lot of young couples in attendance, which seemed strange for an old building away from the town center. Several recognized him and offered a friendly wave.

It appeared Lyon hadn’t caught the guy yet, as he observed some of his father’s hirdmen walking around the room and studying the faces of those assembled. Gray was further impressed by the fire mage, although considering his outlandish appearance, it probably wouldn’t be long before they found him. He kept an eye out, hoping to catch sight of him again.

Gray continued to explore the large room, careful to avoid any attempts at conversation. He noticed a platform at the back decorated in silver and blue, the colors of Isvan, while a colorful sign welcomed everyone to the Isvan Employment Auction.

Employment Auction? He’d never heard of that before.

“What are you doing here? I thought I heard Erza say you went home.”

Gray recognized Lyon’s voice behind him and turned to smirk at his friend. “Never thought I’d see the day someone else would put you in your place.”

“It’s just a matter of time. He’s in here somewhere.”

Lyon didn’t seem concerned in the slightest, instead looking around the room with an odd smile. “This place takes me back.”

“Huh? Back to what?”

“Don’t you remember? This is where your Dad found Ur and hired her to take care of your sorry ass.”

“Here?”

“Oh, that’s right. I forgot we met later.” Lyon pointed to the platform, “Right up there. The organizers had demanded I wait in some back room, but Ur wouldn’t have it. Your dad came to see what the commotion was. That’s how they met.”

“What is this place?”

“Well, most of the time it serves as a storage building for merchant cargo, with the occasional dock worker meeting thrown in. But twice a year it hosts this employment thing for women. They can get hired as governesses, teachers, housekeepers, nannies, you name it. Ur had heard about it when we were in Brago. It’s what brought us here, actually. She’d wanted us to start a new life. You know, after everything.”

Back then, Gray hadn’t cared about where Ur and Lyon had come from, but he struggled to accept that Ur’s introduction into his life had stemmed from anywhere so ordinary.

He’d resented her at first, convinced she was trying to replace his mother. But once her magic lessons began, he’d cast all those feelings aside. Ur was strong. Stronger than any other ice mage he’d ever met. He’d figured if he worked hard and learned everything he could from her, he’d soon be able to avenge his mother and grandfather, and the countless others who had died at the hands of that foul demon. Lyon had been the perfect training partner, equally determined to push through all their limits.

Why had he never thought to ask him why? He’d always known Ur wasn’t Lyon’s mother, but it startled him to realize that even after all these years, he had no clue how they’d ended up together. Lyon was the closest thing he’d ever had to a brother, and it disheartened him to realize how little he truly knew about him.

He opened his mouth to say something, but never got the chance as a man he recognized as Invel Yura, one of his father’s advisors, stepped onto the platform and commanded everyone’s attention.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased to welcome you to this year’s Winter Employment Auction.”

The participants crowded around the platform eagerly, applauding the announcement.

“As many of you might know, our late Chief, Sterling Fullbuster, founded the Employment Auction over twenty-five years ago.” Invel peered at the audience, smiling when he recognized Gray.

“An ardent supporter of women’s rights, Chief Sterling sought to create a safe environment for women to find employment in our great town. Over the years, we have helped place hundreds of women, and as word of our experiment has reached other towns, we have seen increased participation. We are proud to continue this tradition, and we hope that our future Chief, who is with us today, will see fit to continue it for many years to come.”

Gray groaned internally, even as he smiled and waved at those who acknowledged him, realizing he now had no choice but to stay until the conclusion of the event. He attempted but failed to ignore Lyon’s laughter at his predicament. With a parting clap on the shoulder, Lyon informed him he was returning to his search, promising to check in with him later.

He listened as Invel followed his introduction with an explanation of how the auction worked. It seemed to be divided into three phases. In the first phase, employers received a clipboard with several bid forms and were allotted two hours to interview candidates. Each candidate wore a pin on her right shoulder that showed her identification number.

Once time was up, the second phase began. Employers submitted their bids at the platform, placing them into envelopes marked with the candidate’s identification number. Each bid needed to describe the job duties and pay offered clearly.

During the third phase, all candidates would receive their envelopes. They would then evaluate the enclosed offers and pick out the job situation that most appealed to them. Should any issues arise, Invel would mediate them. Seemed simple enough.

With the explanation now at an end, Invel announced the candidates’ entrance and ceded the platform.

Gray was curious to see how many women were taking part, considering the number of people present, but Invel’s approach blocked his view.

Invel bowed his head briefly, and then immediately launched into a scolding. “This is most unusual, Master Gray. All prospective employers must pass a thorough investigation before being allowed to take part. It is one of the safety measures we’ve set in place. Given your position, however, I will allow it this one time. In the future, see that you submit a request in advance.”

Invel thought he was here to hire someone? For what, court jester? Lyon already filled that role nicely. Still, it was easier to play along than attempt to explain how he’d gotten there.

“I apologize, I wasn’t thinking. Thank you for your understanding.”

He accepted the clipboard Invel offered him with a polite smile.

“Of course,” Invel said, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I see someone trying to get my attention. Good luck.”

Gray killed time by walking around the room and trying to blend in, half-listening to conversations around him while keeping an eye out for his mystery man. He still found it hard to believe Ur had been a part of one of these. None of the participants seemed remotely like her. His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when he recognized one candidate.

Shit! What in Hel’s name was Lucy Heartfilia doing here? She’d been the last girl he’d sent home before Juvia. Was she here because of that? Should he go talk to her?

Just as he was deciding it would be best for him to avoid her, another girl joined her. One that immediately drew his interest. Her steps were awkward, and she seemed ill at ease in the formal clothes. Her walk reminded him of a young Erza proudly showing off her first pair of heels, even though she could barely walk in them.

Her pink hair came down to her shoulders in loose waves, while the blue gown she wore contrasted nicely against her tanned skin. At first glance, Gray merely thought her a beautiful girl, until he got a good glimpse at her face.

His eyes widened as he recognized the features. He forgot all about avoiding Lucy, compelled by the need to know if he was right.

“Hi Lucy.”

“Gray.”

Her tone was not welcoming in the slightest, but he ignored it, smiling at her as if they were old friends. His gaze soon shifted to her companion, hoping to force her to speak. If he was right about who she was, she’d try to avoid it.

“Hello, I’m Gray Fullbuster, a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Gray offered his hand in greeting. The girl had been about to shake it when Lucy noticed.

“Natsu!”

The girl’s hand stopped in midair, and she peered at Lucy in confusion. Gray smirked, that was one point for him.

“Natsu, that’s a lovely name, and something we could certainly use a lot more of in Isvan.”

She tilted her head, frowning cutely at him.

“It means summer, doesn’t it?”

“Oh yes, it does,” Natsu replied in a silken voice, which was not at all what Gray had been expecting. Could he be wrong? Was she just a small-town girl who’d come to Isvan in search of a job and was understandably nervous?

“What sorts of jobs are you interested in?”

“We’re looking to be nannies, or governesses. Something I know you’re not in any need of, so if you’ll just excuse us,” Lucy grabbed Natsu’s hand and yanked her away towards a young couple.

Natsu tried to keep up, but ended up losing her balance. Gray was quick to catch her, and as he did, he felt her magic flare, materializing into a thin layer of flames that traveled across her arms.

“Let go of me!”

She struggled in his arms; the flames spreading as she did so, skirting ever closer to the fabric of her dress. Gray’s eyes darted up to follow their path, noting absently that her pin had the number seven emblazoned on it. “I don’t want to hur-.”

“Steady there,” Gray interrupted, smiling down at her as he called on his magic, coating her arms in an icy mist that quickly put out the flames before they could blaze out of control.

Natsu’s jaw dropped as Gray dispelled his flames, “How did you do that?”

Gray wasn’t able to respond right away, for after the initial satisfaction at having succeeded, he’d peered into Natsu’s eyes and now found himself utterly lost in them. He’d never seen any more beautiful. Bursts of green converged on a gold-rimmed pupil, reminding him of the early morning nature walks he’d once taken with his mother in the summers. And when those eyes met his, Gray couldn’t help but recognize the fear and desperation that lurked in their depths.

Pink hair, tanned skin, fire magic, fear - not to mention the awkward way she carried herself. Everything pointed to this being the guy Lyon was after but made up to look and sound like a strikingly beautiful woman. Hell, he’d done such a good job it would even convince Silver.

Natsu must have gotten help from someone here. No, not someone. Gray knew exactly who.

Lucy Heartfilia.

What was her magic? He wracked his brain but couldn’t remember, and that more than anything forced him to acknowledge he'd barely paid any attention to her during their meeting, or to any of the others. But none of that mattered right now because he had a choice to make.

“I just used my magic to push yours back,” Gray finally replied, struggling to keep his voice level so as not to give away that he knew Natsu’s identity.

Natsu gazed at him, his mouth suddenly breaking into a lopsided grin that elicited a strange fluttering in Gray’s chest and complicated his thoughts further.

“Let’s gooo, Natsu,” Lucy urged, and while Natsu had seemed ready to protest, she spun around and followed.

Gray turned to see what had spooked her and spotted Lyon walking swiftly towards them. He could tell from his friend’s expression that he’d already reached the same conclusion.

What should he do, which side should he take?

Gray was the future Chief of Isvan. He knew well that his thoughts should be on the danger this man could pose to his people. But that brief interaction had shown him his instincts had been correct. Natsu didn’t appear to have control over his magic, and Gray had sensed no malice coming from him. In fact, it had been just the opposite. He'd acted terrified when his magic had flared. It just didn’t add up.

Still, Lyon was his best friend, his foster brother, and he didn’t want to get him in trouble either.

Then Gray thought about how his heart had felt at the sight of that grin and how he’d considered Natsu’s appearance could fool even Silver, and a plan formed in his mind.

Confident that Natsu didn’t pose a danger to Isvan, Gray considered pursuing a different choice. One that could both help him and protect Natsu from the hird until he could learn control of his magic.

The more he thought about it, the more convinced Gray became it was the only way to get out of this wedding mess. If he could persuade Natsu to pretend to be his fiancee, he wouldn’t have to marry Juvia and it would give him time to see if something could blossom between them.

He grabbed Lyon by the arm, ignoring his protests as he searched for a place where they could speak privately.

“We need to talk.”

0-0

Gray found a small office near the building’s entrance and shoved Lyon inside. He closed the door behind them and launched into a swift explanation of his plan, but Lyon wouldn’t even let him finish.

“Absolutely not!”

“You’re being unreasonable. Erza said no one was hurt in any of the fires. You must have felt his magic signature. If that were his intent, why only target abandoned buildings?”

“To gauge our response for when he launches his actual attack.”

Gray groaned as he recognized Lyon’s stubborn streak kicking in. He didn’t have time to argue. For his plan to work, he’d need to put a bid in soon.

“What did you expect me to say?” Lyon crossed his arms over his chest. “You don’t know the first thing about this guy, and what little you know points to him being a criminal.”

“He’s terrified. I could see it in his eyes when he lost control a few moments ago. You didn’t see his face when I pushed his fire back. He was relieved.”

“He lost control here?! That’s even more reason to keep him away from our house. He could hurt everyone we care about.”

Lyon had that I know better than you expression on his face that Gray hated with every fiber of his being.

“While surrounded by ice mages?” he snapped, struggling to keep his temper in check despite Lyon’s attitude. He’d known this wouldn’t be easy, but he’d hoped Lyon would be more willing to see his side. Screw it, if logic wouldn’t work then he’d go for pity. It’s not like he wasn’t desperate.

“When I talked with him earlier, I felt something.”

“You just met him, Gray.”

“I know that, but feeling something is already more than the nothing I feel for Juvia. And if I don’t find someone soon, I’ll have no choice but to marry her on my birthday. Fader said so after you left.”

“He said that?”

Lyon looked away, the first outward sign that he was weakening.

“Time’s up, please enter your bids now,” Invel’s voice echoed through the building’s speaker lacrima, injecting an air of urgency to their conversation.

Lyon had shifted his gaze back to him, his eyes boring into him for what seemed like a lifetime. Gray held his breath, worried the slightest gesture from him might work against him.

“I won’t pretend to understand the attraction you feel toward guys, but I can’t imagine how I’d feel if Ur forced me into a marriage.” He remained silent for a few more moments before announcing, “I’m so going to regret this.”

It took Gray a full minute for the meaning to seep into his brain, but once it did, he beamed with excitement. “I knew I could count on you!”

Lyon grinned, “You mean you knew you could con me.”

Gray didn’t have time to refute the charge as Lyon swiftly turned serious, “Just promise me you’ll be careful,”

“I will.”

And he meant it. He understood the trust Lyon was placing in him, and he would do his best to be worthy of it.

“I gotta go put in my bid,” Gray reached for the doorknob, but Lyon grabbed his arm.

“Hold on there, Romeo. You’re going to have to hire someone for real.”

“What? Why?”

“Invel saw you, dumbass. I’m sure he’ll mention it to Silver. If you only show up with your dream girl, Silver will know something’s up.”

“Oh.”

Gray hadn’t considered that, but had to admit it made sense. Who could he hire and for what? The only other person he’d talked to was Lucy, and he was pretty sure she hated his guts.

But if she’d helped Natsu, he should probably monitor her too, just in case he was wrong about all this.

“Oh, and Gray?” Lyon said as Gray opened the door.

Gray turned his head impatiently, waiting to hear what Lyon had to say, even though he was pretty sure he already knew.

“If he refuses your offer, I will arrest him.”

Gray scowled at the words but nodded his understanding. He’d just have to make sure that didn’t happen.

As Lyon issued new orders to his men through his communication lacrima, Gray offered a silent prayer to his favorite deity.

He had a feeling Loki would understand where he was coming from..

0-0

“I can’t wait to see how many bids I got!” Lucy said as they stood with the other candidates, waiting for the organizer to arrive with their envelopes.

“I just want to get out of here.”

The last two hours had been incredibly stressful for Natsu. He’d felt ill at ease with all the stares and attempts at conversation, not to mention the uncomfortable clothes Lucy had forced him to wear. It had taken all of his self-control not to run out of there. When that light blue-haired hirdman had walked towards them, he’d thought he’d get arrested for sure.

The organizer finally got to them, checking the numbers on their pins against the large envelopes he was carrying and handing them each one. They both thanked him.

“I bet you I got a bunch,” Lucy said while opening her envelope, “I was killing it out there!”

Natsu held on to his envelope but didn’t bother opening it, assuming it was empty. Instead, he watched the expressions of the other women with interest. There were a lot of happy tears, and it made him feel good that things had gone well for them.

“One?! I got one stinking offer? Don’t these people know who I am?”

Natsu turned his attention back to Lucy, alarmed by the loudness of her voice. “Hey Lucy, can you keep it down? We’re trying to avoid attention, remember?”

“Right,” Lucy said, her voice coming back down to normal levels. “I’m sorry, it’s just when I stuck around here for this I thought I’d have lots of choices, you know?”

“Well, but one is better than none, right?”

“I suppose.”

“What’s it for, anyway? Is it from that guy that kept staring at your boobs?” Natsu nudged her with his shoulder, trying to get her out of her foul mood.

“Ew, I hope not,” Lucy giggled, “You’re right though, I bet it’s gonna be something great, and at least I won’t have to go back home.”

He should have realized her sudden silence wasn’t a good sign, but he was too busy thinking about how he couldn’t wait to get back into his clothes to notice. His thoughts wandered back to that ice mage, wishing he’d been able to talk to him longer and ask him for help with his problem. He’d seemed like an okay guy.

“That sonofabitch! Does he think he’s funny? Is that it? Is he trying to ruin my life?”

Lucy continued to rant, getting progressively louder. All the other candidates had moved away from them and the man who had handed them their envelopes was making his way towards them, his features set in a scowl. Natsu wanted nothing more than to leave his friend there and make a run for it, ridiculous shoes and all. He could feel his magic surging and his panic mounted.

“Shh, Lucy, please!”

Natsu closed his eyes, resigned to his imminent arrest, this time for disturbing the peace.

“Invel, you may return to your duties, I’ll handle this.”

“Of course, Master Gray, I’ll leave it in your capable hands.”

“You!”

The venom in Lucy’s voice surprised Natsu but not as much as recognizing the other voice. It belonged to the guy who had caught him earlier, who, now that he thought about it, had acted as if he knew Lucy. His pulse sped up as he realized there was still a chance to ask him for help.

“So, you finally found someone who wasn’t quite so... what was it you said? Oh yes, perky,” Lucy seethed, “and now you want me to be your nanny? Do you even know what your little stunt cost me?”

“Look, I’m sorry about the whole turning you down thing,” Gray said, “It was nothing personal, okay? I’m sure you’re perfect.”

“Damn right I am!”

Natsu looked from one to the other, completely lost to what was going on.

“Could you keep your voice down?” Gray hissed, “I just want a minute to plead my case before you decide.”

“She only got the one offer,” Natsu revealed without thinking.

“Seriously?” Gray laughed, “Must be her charming personality.”

Natsu wanted to laugh at the retort, but he knew better than to provoke Lucy when she was seriously pissed. “Dude, you are so not helping your case.”

He frowned, hating how strange his voice sounded.

“Oh, right.” Gray ran his fingers through his hair, and flashed a sheepish grin that, while oddly distracting to Natsu, did nothing to placate Lucy.

“Well, you can take your job offer and shove it where the sun doesn't shine.”

Gray’s shoulders slumped at her words, “I already said I was sorry, didn’t I? Besides, I only wrote nanny cause it was something you were considering. You can do whatever you want. If you’d bothered to look at the actual offer, you’d see the pay is more than fair.”

Lucy examined the paper, her eyes widening as she read the offer over, finally looking up at Gray with a guarded expression. “I don’t understand.”

“I’ll be happy to explain, but not here. I’ll need both of you for what I have in mind. Well, to be honest, it’s up to Natsu. If she doesn’t agree, then the offer is off,” Gray said, turning to Natsu.

“You want my help?”

“Yeah, didn’t you see my offer?”

“There’s something in here?” Natsu opened his envelope, saw there were several pieces of paper inside, and snapped it shut quickly.

“Well? Let’s see it,” Lucy gave him a curious glance, “What did he put down on yours?”

“Um, it doesn’t matter. He can just tell me.”

“Honestly, I’d rather you read it, it’s kind of embarrassing.”

“It, uh, doesn’t matter what it is,” Natsu said, hiding the envelope behind his back, “I’m happy to do it as long you promise to help me with my magic.”

“Yeah, sure, I can do that.”

Gray looked relieved and Natsu wondered what he’d just gotten himself into, but it didn’t really matter. Lucy had saved him from the hirdmen, and it seemed as if she wouldn’t have a job if he didn’t accept. Plus, he wasn’t afraid of hard work, and getting help in controlling his increasingly erratic magic would make it worth his while.

“Alright, then you have yourself a deal,” Natsu offered his hand to seal the deal, not knowing how to respond when Gray pulled it up to his mouth for a kiss instead of shaking it.

It was then he understood two things. First, why Lucy had yelled at him earlier. It hadn’t occurred to him that girls rarely shook hands. Second, and by far the most important, Gray thought he was a girl.

He was about to clear that up when a more pressing issue presented itself. The hirdman who’d been chasing him earlier walked up to them, and although Natsu desperately wanted to run away, he knew he couldn’t do that without giving himself away. He only hoped that the guy would leave quickly and not look at him too closely.

“Everything okay over here, Gray?”

“Everything’s fine!” Gray smiled, “I’d like you to meet Natsu. And you remember Lucy?”

“Yes, of course, lovely to see you again, Lucy,” The hirdman bowed slightly to both of them, gazing at Natsu with open curiosity.

“Natsu love, I’d like you to meet Lyon, my foster brother.”

That guy was Gray’s foster brother?!

That complicated everything! How could he tell Gray the truth about who he was now?

He couldn’t and he didn’t like what that implied. The more agitated he became, the more his magic roared, itching to get out. Natsu had almost given up on containing it when Gray placed his hand on the small of his back, reining in the fire that churned inside him with one simple gesture.

Natsu didn't understand the how or why of it, but it made him realize that the safest place for him right now was by Gray’s side, at least until he could regain control of his magic. So he met Lyon’s gaze and flashed him his most disarming smile.

“It’s so nice to meet you.”

#fairy tail #gratsu #update #fic #gray x natsu #male order bride #mob #ch 2

20 notes · View notes

objection-argumentative · 3 years

Text

Soulmates Part 6

Masterlist!

I know his dad is already dead in the show, but I want him alive for the drama. if you have any ideas or feedback, please let me know

I hope you’re enjoying it!

Kelsey eyes fluttered open at 5:50 am; she could feel Rafael staring down at her. "you know if you take a picture, it will last longer" Kelsey smiled up to Rafael over sweetly as she got to throw the statement right back into his face. He chuckled lightly. "Don't worry, dulce chica, I intend to. I have to go soon. I have to get ready for work and change my suit." Kelsey nodded and snuggled back into the older man "just five more minutes." Rafael kissed her temple "baby, I need to get going. My uber is ten minutes away from your apartment, and we have a busy day at work." The couple got out of bed. Kelsey took her robe off the bathroom door and tied it around herself, and brushed her teeth while Rafael got dressed back into last night's clothes.

Kelsey walked out of the bathroom to Rafael; he was buttoning up his coat. The young detective pulled him into a warm embrace. "I know I am going to see you in a few hours, but I don't want you to go." "I know neither do I chica dulce" Rafael kissed her temple and removed himself from her embrace. "My uber is here, baby. I will see you soon." Kelsey nodded her head as he exited her apartment.

At 8:50 am, Kelsey walked through from the lift to her desk. She didn't have time to get her usual coffee order as she decided to have a bath instead of a shower; because of this decision, she didn't have time to do her makeup or grab herself a coffee. Kelsey felt self-conscious because she didn't have any of her makeup on, and she hadn't had her daily caffeine fix.

Just as Kelsey got to her desk, an arm came round from the back of her and produced her vanilla latte "one vanilla latte that is far too sweet to be called coffee for a sweet girl" she turned around, and he was grinning from ear to ear. Rafael placed a kiss on Kelsey's lips that turned heated very fast; they pulled away from each other as soon as they heard the catcalls from the squad. The couple smirked at each other "I think we have an audience counselor." she whispered to the older man as she took the coffee cup from Rafael's hand. Kelsey turned back to her desk to turn on her laptop just as the ADA stepped away from her.

*7 pm that evening*

"Excuse me, are you a detective? I want to report an assault on my daughter's behalf. My name is Mrs. Emily Junave" an older white woman with ginger hair approached Kelsey's desk. "yes, ma'am, I am. How about you make yourself comfortable over there on one of those leather seats, and I will grab my partner, and we can discuss the assault."

Kelsey and Rollins followed the older woman to the seats and sat down; " I'm detective Kelsey Hardy, and this is Detective Amanda Rollins, so you say that your daughter may have been assaulted." "Yes, that's is correct. Katie has been feeling very unwell recently, and I took her to the doctor's office this morning, and we have just found out she is 14 weeks pregnant," the older woman explained. "Does Katie have a boyfriend that could be the father of her unborn child?" detective Rollins questioned "No, there aren't any significant men in her life; both her grandfathers died before she was born, and my husband left Katie and me when she was three years old, and Katie doesn't have a boyfriend; she isn't allowed." "Mrs. Junave, how old is Katie?" Kelsey asking cautiously, feeling like there is something she is missing "Katie is 25; we were going to have a big party to celebrate." Both of the detectives looked at each other and looked back at the older woman in front of them. "Mrs. Junave, did Katie tell you that she has been assaulted?" Kelsey cocked her head to the side as she waited for the older lady reply "No, she didn't, but I know that Katie didn't willingly have sex with anyone." the older woman looked between the two blonde detectives and realized that she wasn't getting anywhere. The two detectives believed that she was just an overprotective mama bear. "You don't believe me, do you? I know my daughter couldn't consent to sex. If you don't think I'm telling the truth, come and find out for yourself."

The older lady took off down the corridor with the detectives hot on her heels. The three women stop at the wooden benches in a nearby hall. When they got to the wooden benches, they could see a young larger girl sat down. She faced the window so nobody could see her. Mrs. Junave crouched down to be level with her daughter; "Katie, can you say hello to the nice detectives?" Katie turned around and faced the two blonde women. Rollins and Kelsey looked at each other, shocked as they didn't expect Katie to be Down syndrome. "Hello," Katie replied bluntly. "Hi Katie, My name is Amanda, and this is Kelsey. We are going to help you." Mrs. Junave ushered Katie up and held her hand "well, if you excuse me, detectives, Katie has had a long day, and it's her bedtime now. We will come in tomorrow morning to answer your questions and pass along any information that you need." Like that, the mother and daughter were heading towards the exit, ignoring the detective's calls to bring them back.

"Rollins, Hardy, what we got?" Captain Cragen asked as he came out of his office. "25-year-old Katie Junave, She has been brought in by the mother as she is 14 weeks pregnant. The mother claimed she had been raped as she isn't allowed a boyfriend or has any significant males in her life." Rollins answered "so we have a very delusional mother thinking her little girl is innocent and pure, and then all of a sudden she finds out she is pregnant, which shatters that idea, and now she is crying rape?" Rafael walked from the bullpen to the desks to hear about the new case." "Counselor, it's not like that. The girl is down syndrome which is tricky because we don't know what level she is or what happened. We just spoke to the mother, and we briefly met Katie before she was whisked off for bedtime." Kelsey spoke with frustration in her voice towards the mother.

Kelsey sat down at her desk to type up the notes from the disclosure made by Mrs. Junave. Rafael came up behind her and started kneading the Knots out of her neck "why don't you finish up your notes, and you can come to my apartment. I will cook, we can have some wine and watch trashy tv. We could even stop by your apartment for an overnight bag?" "That sounds amazing. Give me an hour to finish up, and I will meet you at my apartment." Rafael could burst with happiness right now. "Okay, dulce chica, I'm going to my office to drop these files off and go to the market to pick supplies. I will see you in an hour."

Kelsey finished up and headed home; as she walked through the door, she could see her roommate Joanne on the couch watching some documentary. "Who were you sneaking out of the apartment this morning?" Joanne quizzed "My soulmate Rafael Barba, which happens to be my squads ADA at work." Joanne looked at her in disbelief "You have a soulmate bond?" kelsey rolled up her sleeve and showed her roommate her scar. "I'm so happy for you, Kels. You deserve to be happy in life and make your own choices. Promise me ill get to meet him soon, and we can have a girl's night to discuss him" Kelsey laughed at her best friend. "Of course we can. We can discuss all the nitty-gritty details over cocktails, but right now, I need to pack an overnight bag as I am spending the night at his place."

Kelsey walked to her bedroom and packed a bag for herself. She added her makeup and toiletries bag with her clothes and PJs. Kelsey zipped the bag up and placed it on the floor. Just as she stood straight, Kelsey saw him lent up against the door frame. He then made his way over to her and pulled her in for a chaste kiss. "Hey baby, uber is downstairs if you're ready" she nodded her head and grabbed her bag. Leaving the apartment, she said goodbye to Joanne, and they both made their way downstairs.

Kelsey and Rafael were cuddling on the couch with a glass of white wine each, relaxing in each other's company. All of sudden, there was pounding on his front door. It was as if the person's life depended on being in the apartment. Rafael opened the door, fully intending to shout at the individual who was ruining his perfect evening. But as the door swung open and two furious older women stormed into the apartment.

They didn't even see Kelsey sitting on the couch in their rage. "Rafi, he has outdone himself this time. He is moving back home from Miami. He is also getting married-she is nineteen," the younger woman of the pair fumed at Rafael. Then it was the older one's turn to speak. "He wants a second chance of a relationship with you. as if you would leave everything in the past and forget to play happy families with him and his child bride." both women were looking at Rafael expectantly for a reaction. he sighed heavily. "Mami, Abuela, would you like a glass of wine?" both women shrieked. "WINE! YOU CAN NOT BE SERIOUS,". he sighed again, and kelsey rubbed his back "nothing that man does ever surprises me anymore. My father is a law of himself, and we are all dolls in his theatre. If he wants to reach out, let him it won't last long like his marriage. He will be back onto better things soon."

The two women look defeated."I guess your right, Rafi. He makes me mad that he lives likes this with no consequences." The older woman spoke. The younger woman hasn't stopped staring at Kelsey since she rubbed her son's back. "Who are you?" Rafael gives his mother a warning look " This is Miss Kelsey Hardy. She is a new detective with the Manhattan Special Victims Unit and so happens to be my soulmate." he then rolls his sleeves up and shows the room his scar; there is a deafening silence.

#rafael barba fanfiction #rafael barba fic #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba #rafael barba smut #rafeal barba fluff #law and order special victims unit

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maggyme13 · 4 years

Text

Sugar (15/?)

Warnings: I don´t think so..

Wordcount: around 2300

Masterlist

Sugar- Masterlist

Part 14

Heavy fog was all around.

It weighted on your head, chest, and extremities not allowing you to move even a hair.

Am I dead? What happened? -Oh yeah, a car...

Then darkness took over your mind again and when you came to the next time, voices were there as well.

“She has a bad concussion, heavy bruising and her left shoulder was dislocated. But otherwise, she was very lucky. This accident could have ended in her death.”, an unknown male´s voice stated.

“

“When do you think she will be waking up again?”, this voice sounded like Bucky.

“Soon. Her body is exhausted from the accident. But she should be awake any day now.”

“Thank you, doctor.”

“Mr Laufeyson. Mr Barnes.”, the first male said, and soon after a door closed.

“Any news from the Sheriff?”, Loki wanted to know and Bucky answered.

“No. Just what Sam found out himself when he dragged that drunk bastard from behind the wheel.”

A drunk? But why was that car so silent.

“Stupid electric car. If it wasn´t for that silent engine, we would have heard him coming a long time ago.”, your friend cursed.

Electric, which explains the missing noise. I wonder how the others are doing. And Hati.

Not long after, exhaustion took over and you fell asleep again.

.-.-...-.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-

“Please, I just want five minutes. Not more not less.”, it was your brother.

“Why should I allow you into this room?”, Loki asked with his manager- voice.

“I am her brother.”

Ha. Sure.

“Really? Trusting my information, you disowned her just a few days ago. So why the sudden change?”, the CEO hummed.

“Why do you care?”, your brother growled and you could imagine the burning look in his eyes.

“Why shouldn´t I? (Y/N) is very dear to me.”

“Sure, I bet she is just another pussy for ya. Another naive girl from a small town to pull under the spell of luxurious life and make them do whatever you want. It was you who gave her the money for Ma´s house, am I right? What did you make her do in return? Huh? Have her take it in the ass? Have her blow you under the table while you have a video call? Tell me. What was your prize? What did my sister have to give you?”, at first he had this mocking laugh in his voice, but it got colder with every spoken word.

“Speaking out of your own experience? It is known that you bikers don´t really care about your female companions, you take what you want from them and share them as others do with Pizza.”, now it was Loki who sounded mocking, “They are someone's daughters and sisters after all.”

The tension that followed was cut-able and a feeling weaseled down your spine. A feeling that only showed itself whenever you were about to witness your brother´s anger and so you prayed that Bucky, Sam, or Thor were near to protect your boss. Or else you had to fear for his well being.

“But as you seem to be one to demand answers in using other ways if they are not given as requested, I will answer you. Nothing. There was no prize for her to pay. I gave her the money out of a free will and without any ulterior motive, as a gift. And before you ask, I never demanded anything from her she was not willing to give. And until recently, that had only been her companionship and care, nothing sexual.”

“If you say so.”, Happy growled lowly.

“She cooks and bakes for me when she feels the need to. She looks after the apartment when she has time. Joins me to dinner, or lunch and business functions. Otherwise, she can do and go whatever or where ever she wants to. I admit, at first, when we first met, I did not treat her in a way I should have. But I explained myself, apologized and we came to an understanding.”

“Yer are her fucking Sugardaddy.”, your brother sneered, “You made a whore out of my sister. A freaking croweater.”

“You see, there is a difference between your sister and one of your Croweaters. First of all, the only person your sister would sleep with is me if she chooses to. With the emphasis being on: if SHE chooses to. Even so, I am her Sugardaddy or Dominant, she holds the real power in this dynamic, this relationship. She decides what she want ´s to let me have. Just as she did when she came and soughed comfort with me after you broke her heart.”

“You fucked her when she was vulnerable? Took advantage of her, when she was not in her right mind? Is that what you want to tell me?”, now he was nearly shouting in his burning anger and you believed to hear the sound of a gunshot soon.

What NO! Happy…

“No. What I said, was that she came to me to seek comfort. She made Steak and when I came out of the shower, she was waiting for me only dressed in some lingerie. She offered herself to me. I believe she decided that if everybody thinks her a whore, why not do as they think and fuck? I did not, believe me, before you get a stroke out of anger. She was the only one who came to a release that night. And the only thing entering her that night was my tongue and finger. I kept my dick in my pants. Unlike other people, I can control my needs and put those of my partner above my own. I only take what is offered and not demand to get something offered so I can take what I want.-”

Wow. That was far too much information for my brother. What is going on?

“-Now that this is out of the way. Tell me, why should I allow you to be in the same room as (y/n), alone?”

“She is my sister, and she is very dear to me. Just as she is to you.”, your brother suddenly admitted and your mouth would have fallen open, if you were awake, “That´s why I did what I did.”

“I am sorry, but I can not really follow you I think. Please, explain how you broke your sister´s heart because you love her as you claim.”

“Huh,”, he snorted and sighed, “I always did. I loved her from the moment she was born. Her father was a dickhead who treated our mother like shit. He beat her regularly, just as he did with me. The only one who was spared was (y/n). Did I loath her for that when I was a child? Maybe, but Ma explained that he only spared her because he could not excuse bruises or injuries on her body as easily as with us. Ma would be clumsy and I a rowdy child. But what could a few month old baby be? -”

I never heard this version before. I never heard anything of this before.

“ - The bastard was killed when I was in my teens. (y/n) was still too young to remember. And I had already my problems with the cops and other people like me. I knew she would be in danger if anyone learned about her. So I did the only thing I could: make everyone, including her, believe I hated her like nothing else. Like that she would have no importance to those that meant me harm.”

“You did it to protect her.”, Loki hummed.

“Yes.”

“You hurt her. Made her believe she is unwanted and maybe even hated by you to protect her?”, the CEO asked again to make sure.

“I wanted to rather see her hating me than being dead.”, your brother admitted and tears gathered behind your heavy eyelids.

“Then why disowning her? You already had what you wanted. Why broke the last bit of her?”

“She is as stubborn as the rest of us Lowmanns, even though she changed her name as soon as she could. She left to study in NY. Had to stop because it became too expensive for her to pay. I told Ma, she should give her some money from me and say it was from her. (y/n) never asked for money. She moved out into a different apartment, started to work full time at a diner, and worked her ass off from then on. Not once asking for money, but rather sending any spare penny she got to help Ma. She lived but she never lived. If you know what I mean. She always cared more about others than about herself and not once did she have someone who cared about her. That stupid boyfriend of hers, who should have treated her just the way she was treating him, was of no use either. And I am still tempted to get my ass over there and spend him a visit.”, the last part was a deep promising growl.

“Mhm. I know what you mean.”, Loki hummed in approval.

“I wanted her to leave and forget us. To finally think about herself first and not about us. Not about a way to get Ma enough money for her medication before having even paid for her food. Not about a way to help Ma with her groceries before being able to afford new clothing. Not about a damn bank account, she started to gather good damn money in case someone has to bail me out should something happen to Ma while I am in Jail because no one paid one.”, Happy was nearly shouting now.

Does he know about all of this? Well, Aunti must have spilled the beans on some of this, but … no one knew about the account. How?

“I just wanted her to be free from us. Free to live her life without anyone holding her back. And what did it bring? Nothing. She was hit by a god damned drunk driver in the one city I should be able to protect her. And yet, she was hit merely a hundred meters away from me. And I was able to do nothing.”

Wait.. he was there?

Another heavy silence hung in the air.

“I never saw her as happy as she was after she came back from your business-dinner, or in that park just before the car hit her.”, Happy breathed, “Don´t make the same mistake I did and break her heart-”

“Because?”, Loki asked interested, musing what the biker had in mind otherwise.

“Because then I and everyone I know will make sure you will regret it. And if it is the last thing I will do. Not the most expensive security detail will be able to protect you. I will find you, and I will make you suffer.”, your brother stated his voice cold as ice.

“A strange promise to make at the bed of an ill person.”, Loki mused.

“Ain´t a promise. I swear this by my mother´s life and my Harley.”

“I will remember this. But be assured: I have no intention to ever hurt your sister. She is the purest and most caring person I have ever met in my life. If she allows it, I will lay the earth to her feet and give her everything she wants, needs, and more.”

“Good. And you do well to remember that Laufeyson. I will trust you with her now that I know I was right about you. I will leave then. Have a nice day.”, you heard your brother move. You did not want him to leave.

“You can stay here if you want. I will let my men know that you are no danger to (y/n) and that I allowed you in here. I have to speak to the doctor and then make a few calls.”, Loki said.

“I will let her know if she wakes up. If she lets me speak that is.”

“Thank you Mr Lowmann.”

“Call me Happy. Only Cops, Judges, and agents call me Mr Lowmann.”

“Happy.”, Loki nodded and soon later, you heard the door to your room close.

Heavy leather boots closed in on your bed and not a second after the screeching of cold metal on the tile floor reached your ears.

“I am sorry for what you went through all these years. I know I will never be able to make it right to you, and I totally understand that. Ma already had my hide after what I said a few days ago. And Tig gave me a black eye when he figured out why you ran crying. It´s ironic, isn't it? I do all of this to protect you and yet, here we are. You are in a damn hospital after nearly dying through a drunk driver who drove a car I fucking repaired a week ago. Karma is a bitch, huh? I wonder if fate wanted to hit me and not you.”, you felt your brother reaching for your hand, gently brushing his thumb over the back of it for a few minutes before his phone rang and he sighed.

“Yeah?”, he asked, “With my sister at the hospital. Na she seems to have only minor injuries. Yeah, best luck someone can have. What do you want?… alright. I will be there in twenty... I am sorry, sister. I gotta go. If I don´t see you before you leave for NY, be well. I love you, little Sis.”

And then he did something he never did and you wished he would do when you were younger; placing a kiss on the top of your head and ruffling your hair.

It was soon after your brother left that you once again fell asleep.

Part 16

AN 2.0. So, be honest... Who saw this revelation coming?

REBLOGS and comments are appreciated:)

Thank you very much.

~MaggY

Taglists:

Permanent:

@jadepc@pacifyhxlsey @thankyoukarenclifford

@thankyouforanonymity @punkrockhufflefluff

@scarletraine @buckycaptspideypool @markusstraya @graveyard-groupie @markusstrayya @randomgirlkensy @the-soulofdevil

@marshyrebelcloud

MCU:

@yknott81 @banner-and-bucky-are-life @forext20 @dyanlzbb @so-finster-die-nacht @emmii4 @bitchwhytho @ladyofmyst @jilldsumner @momc95 @appreciating-fanfics

Sugar:

@bits-and-bobs-and-kawaii-stuffs @mimmie666 @fullranchwolfoperator

@cluelessnitwhit @youknowitsclouds @his-paradox @purplerainharry

@spootgaai2000 @iamsuperjenna @nikkipea @alexakeyloveloki @timelordy-fangirl2 @girrafeeeeeee @emilyjane44x @randomgirlwholoveskpop @deathkat657

I couldnt tag a few of you… sorry.

Want to get tagged as well? Comment, Reblog or send an ask to let me know.

#Sugardaddy Loki #Sugardaddy Loki x Reader #Loki x Reader #Reader insert #loki laufeyson #MCU #alternate universe #Sons of Anarchy

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alj4890 · 4 years

Text

And Then I Met You

What happens when the one you thought you were meant for turns out to be meant for someone else?

A\N Choices Fan Fiction with characters from The Royal Romance, Red Carpet Diaries, and Perfect Match

@lxaah11 @alleksa16 @penguininapinktuxedo @blackcoffee85 @stopforamoment @hopelessromantic1352 @krsnlove @annekebbphotography @hopelessromantic1352 . @sunflowergirl05 @desireepow-1986 @greywitchyshots @lilyofchoices @moodyvalentinestories @emceesynonymroll @my-heart-beats-for-ya @aworldoffandoms @ab1901 @lolablackwrites @flyawayboo @i-bloody-love-drake-walker . @trappedinfandoms @kate-mckenzie

Masterlist

Part 26

Cormery Isle, Cordonia...

"Welcome, your grace." Thurston bowed while kissing Olivia's hand. "It has been some time since we have been fortunate enough to host the Duchess of Lythikos."

"Yes, it has." She focused her attention to the two young ladies beside him and smiled. "And how are the ladies of Cormery Isle?"

"We are--" Blair began.

"Awful." Arabella interrupted. "That's why I asked for you to come."

"What's this?" Thurston asked.

"Bella, I don't want you worrying about--" Blair's voice cracked causing her to take a stuttering breath to regain her calm.

"You're my sister!" Arabella snapped. "I'm not about to let that witch take away your chance at happiness." She returned her sharp-eyed gaze to Olivia, the very duchess who had stepped up to be a mentor when her mother died. "Remember the promise you made me?"

"I do." Olivia replied. "That's why I'm here instead of Ramsford."

Thurston, still perplexed, waved toward his study. "Perhaps we should take this discussion somewhere a bit more private."

With a regal nod, the scarlet duchess led the way inside.

"See that we are not disturbed." The earl whispered to his butler. "Especially by my son."

With an ominous click, the door shut in the bewildered servant's face.

***************

St Orella, Cordonia...

The ballroom was filled with extras, dressed in Regency Era clothing, dancing the Cordonian Waltz.

Amanda sat beside Thomas with a set of headphones on. Her eyes were glued to the screen in front of them as they watched and listened to Chris (as Reginald) and Jessica (as Elizabeth) speak their lines all while keeping up with the dance steps. Ryan (as Arthur) was waiting on his cue to make a dramatic entrance.

"I was unaware he was returning." Elizabeth insisted. "I haven't spoken to Lord Arthur since he was sent away."

Reginald clinched his jaw. Wanting to believe the woman he was set to marry and was now losing his heart to warred with his suspicion over the man his intended had once been involved with.

Elizabeth blinked back tears. She couldn't stand to see the man whose kindness and gentle humor she had grown accustomed to being replaced with such self-doubt. Knowing it was frowned upon for a lady to initiate such, yet needing to show him that he was the one winning her heart, she captured his lips in an achingly tender kiss.

Reginald tightened his arms around her as he sank into her embrace. His lips curved against hers when he heard her slight gasp when he kissed her again.

A throat cleared beside them.

Arthur's face was unreadable as he spoke with little inflection. "Time to switch partners."

He took Elizabeth in his arms and waltzed off with her.

"Arthur!" Elizabeth shrieked when he swung her outside to the courtyard. "What do you think you are doing?!"

"I thought I was doing what any man would do after being reunited with the woman who claimed to love him." He cornered her against the balustrade. "I didn't expect you to find another so soon."

Elizabeth glared at him. "The Queen arranged my betrothal to Sir Reginald."

"Ah," his eyes narrowed. "And you took it upon yourself to make him feel so loved."

"You left me!" She cried out. "Without a word or a promise! I had to obey her. She is my guardian and I--"

Arthur grasped her arms and shook her. "I left you my heart! How quickly you dismissed it is yet to be discovered." His hooded eyes dropped to her mouth. "Perhaps you need a reminder of what was once between us."

"No--" she pushed against his chest when he slammed his mouth on hers.

"Unhand her!" Reginald ripped Arthur away.

Elizabeth fell back against the balustrade, anxiously looking from one man to the other.

"She is not yours." Arthur informed him. "She never will be as long as there is breath in my body." Reginald's voice had a deadly edge that Elizabeth had never heard before. "She is the woman I am going to marry. Blessed and given to me by the Queen." Reginald’s gaze softened for a moment when he turned toward Elizabeth. "You sir, have no rights to my intended." He continued.

"I claim the rights of her heart." Arthur countered. "Before I was sent away, she let it be known that I was what she wanted." His typical, confident smirk formed. "Looks like you are too late to win such."

Elizabeth's heart ached when Reginald seemed to falter at Arthur's arguments.

Their eyes met and she saw all the uncertainty he suffered with.

He had done everything he knew to do to win her love. She knew that he did not have to make such an effort when she was already promised to marry him. Knowing he did so because he cared for her and their future made her long to be with him.

She then focused on the man she had first loved. Arthur had opened her eyes to how deep that emotion could be. It was an almost desperate love, one filled with passion and need. How could she even contemplate another's attentions when he had laid his heart at her feet?

Her eyes continued to flicker back and forth between the two. With a cry of frustration, she gathered her skirts and ran blindly through the ballroom.

Her closest confidante, Lady Marija, followed her. She stopped the fleeing duchess at the foot of the stairs.

"Liza! Wait!" She gently grasped her friend's hands. "You're trembling. What happened?"

"Oh Marija." She swiped at the tears falling, "What am I to do?" She buried her face against her friend's shoulder. "Arthur has returned and Reginald thinks I do not love him and..."

Marija listened while looking back behind her for the men they were discussing. Her own face revealed how much this hurt her for her dearest friend and the two gentlemen…especially Lord Arthur. "Who do you love?"

Elizabeth straightened her posture and shook her head. "I love them both. Somehow, they each made me fall in love with them." Her blue eyes shimmered with her tears in the candlelight. "What am I to do?"

Marija stepped back. For once in her life, she was determined to see what future was about to be laid before them. "Liza, who can you see yourself married to? Having children with?"

Elizabeth turned her gaze to the two men standing in the ballroom. Her heart raced with the thought of having a home with only one.

“Reginald. He is the only man I can see having a life with.” Elizabeth’s tearful smile appeared. “Oh Marija, I love him with my entire heart.”

"Cut!" Thomas yelled out.

Amanda removed the headphones and quickly wiped the tears that had come to her own eyes. This part of her ancestor's story had always hurt her.

Perhaps it was because she had known what it was like to love one and fall in love with another. The doubt about one's own heart if it fell too quickly and so easily for another. Worrying you might hurt the one you now claimed to love.

"What do you think?" Thomas asked, as Addison hurried to repair a tear in one of the extra's dresses.

"It's incredible." Amanda replied. "Seeing it brought to life is just..." She searched for a tissue to wipe the stray tears. "I can't imagine it done any other way."

He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, pleased she approved of how he handled this scene and yelled out to set up for the next one.

"Where are you going?" He asked when she eased out of her chair.

A slight blush formed on her cheeks. "I know it sounds silly, but I'm going to the portrait gallery." Her eyes dropped to the floor. "I need a reminder that she ended up with her happily ever after with Reginald."

Before he had a chance to say anything more, she turned on her heel and left the ballroom.

***************

Cormery Isle, Cordonia...

"You want Tariq for a husband?" Thurston asked.

"I love him, Father." Blair admitted. "I always have. Knowing how highly you and mother thought of him made my feelings even more right."

"And that's why we have to get rid of Lauren." Arabella explained. "After closely spying on her these past couple of weeks, I have discovered that she is secretly pursuing Neville. Though, thankfully our brother no longer pays her any attention."

"What?!" Blair screeched. "She is using the man I love and my brother?!"

Thurston's expression hardened to one of cold hatred. "That interloper has no idea the enemy she has just made."

"You're not the only one." Olivia remarked. "Lauren Benefield tried to end Amanda Bridgerton's marriage to Thomas Hunt. She has incurred not only my wrath for going after my friend but those of Prince Liam and House Beaumont."

"So, you will help us?" Arabella asked, hope tinging her voice. "I knew you would!"

"I would have regardless because of my promise to you as your mentor." Olivia corrected. "I'm merely letting you know how those of us who know Lauren truly feel." Her green eyes leveled on Lord Thurston. "And I believe you, sir, especially hold ill will toward her after going after Amanda."

"Indeed." His deep voice rumbled with his mounting anger. "Our family owes a debt to hers."

"Lady Amanda saved me from embarrassing myself during my first ball at the palace." Blair added.

"She did?" Thurston leaned forward. "You never told me that."

Blair's cheeks heated when all eyes turned to her. "When I was leaving the powder room, I was too excited to return to the ballroom and did not check my dress. Lady Amanda was coming in as I was exiting and smiled at me. She then grabbed my arm and pulled me back inside. The back of my dress had gotten caught in my pantyhose."

"Your bottom was showing?!" Thurston softly cursed then apologized to the ladies. "You would have been the laughingstock of the entire court had she not saved you."

Blair nodded. "If I had known that this woman Neville and Tariq had brought home was treating Amanda so horribly, I would have likely poisoned her tea."

"Tempting." Olivia remarked. "We have all been tempted to do that." She stood and paced before them. “What I am about to say cannot leave this room.”

When each nodded, she continued. “I will be leaving tomorrow evening for Monterisso to speak with Queen Amalas.”

“The spy queen!” Thurston sputtered. “Whatever for?”

“There have been some discoveries of Ms. Benefield’s activities along with those of Viktor Montmarte. With what I already uncovered and anticipate in finding, I suggest you do all you can to distance yourselves from this actress.”

“Activities?” Blair repeated. “What has she—”

“No.” Thurston gently cut off his daughter. “If Lady Olivia insists that the less we know the better off we will be, then I will not question her.”

“A wise decision.” Olivia added. “What you need to focus on is finding a way for Tariq to break off the engagement. I would also suggest keeping Neville from her in case she tries to trap him in some sort of scandal.” Her eyes narrowed. “Things will only get worse once the wheels of vengeance are in motion.”

"I've been thinking of a way to do that, especially since Tariq has been spending more time with Blair." Arabella added. "I think he is seeing how horrible Lauren is when compared to how sweet Blair is to him."

Her sister blushed even more.

Thurston actually smiled seeing his daughter look as her late mother did when he courted her. "If Tariq is who your heart is set on, then he is the man you shall have."

"Father! Thank you!" Blair rushed over to hug him and kiss his cheek. "Nothing would make me happier than marrying him."

He gently patted her cheek. "I would be proud to call him my son." He stood up and was once again stern, roiling with anger. "I agree with her grace." He paced before them. "The only way your brother and Tariq will get over this actress is by showing them what she truly is."

"Blair’s birthday is in a few days.” Arabella pointed out. “We usually start the day with an early morning horseback ride.” Her brow furrowed in thought. “I had planned on somehow getting Lauren to lose that sweet act she tries to maintain in front of everyone.”

"Very good." Olivia smiled at her. "Nothing to make a person more vulnerable than out in the wilderness."

The young lady beamed with pride over her mentor's words and her father's proud smile.

"It can also be a way to show Tariq what a proper lady Blair is." He added.

"Once Lauren’s engagement is broken, Liam has a plan in place to remove her from our country." Olivia informed them. "Ms. Benefield will no longer find sanctuary in Cordonia.” A smile filled with hints of evil formed. “I wonder where she will try to go. Her home in Hollywood won’t be safe either once my plan is enacted. She has ruined or tried to ruin the lives of many people within the motion picture industry and those who have inherited wealth. No one will be willing to help her."

"To go after the Duchess and her Duke of St Orella, and two of Cordonia's Lords should be enough to ruin her in the eyes of the world." Thurston grumbled. "She should never have attacked Cordonia's finest."

"I agree." Olivia rose from her chair. "With your permission, I would like to stay here until my flight tomorrow." Her smile held a great deal of evil intent. "Nothing could bring me greater joy than seeing the one who dared to cross my friend begin her downfall."

Arabella entwined her arm with Olivia's. "You are more than welcome to, and I hope you also participate in it. Vengeance is a dish best shared."

**************

Later that evening, Cormery Isle...

"Neville!" Lauren chased after him as he began his descent downstairs.

He braced himself and turned toward her. "Yes?"

She forced a flirtatious smile on her face. "We haven't had a chance to speak privately." She pouted in a way she knew most men couldn't resist and trailed a finger down the buttons of his shirt. "I think we have a few things that need to be thoroughly discussed." She leaned in close to let her lips brush his ear. "Explore how things should be between us."

He jerked away from her. "I think we have said all that needs to be said."

Her eyes narrowed when he turned his back on her and continued downstairs.

"What about your proposal?" She called out. "I bet my fiancé would be interested in hearing that his so-called best friend insisted I call off my engagement and marry him instead."

Neville froze on the stairs. The glare he sent over his shoulder normally caused commoners to tremble, yet she met it with a defiant smile.

"The proposal is no longer on the table." He informed her. Deciding to punish her for her empty threat, his lips curved at his next sentence. "You didn't call it off when I asked you to, therefore I have moved on to more attractive prospects."

Her eyes widened. "What?! But you said--"

He turned his back once more on her, calmly continuing down to dinner.

As he turned the corner, he heard her frustrated screech.

"What on earth--oh it's you." Arabella appeared on the stairs. "I could have sworn I heard a cat being tortured somewhere."

Enraged already with the Vancoeur's, Lauren tried to slap the teenager.

Instead she ended up raising a hand to her own stinging cheek.

Arabella stepped closer to her; eyes narrowed. "Is there something you want to say to me?"

"You slapped me!" Lauren gasped.

"You were about to slap me." She reminded her. "Now you know how foolish it is to try."

"You little bitch, I’ll beat--"

"Is there a problem?"

Both looked up at Olivia.

"Is there?" Arabella asked Lauren.

Knowing she was no match for the two of them, she shook her head. "No."

"I didn't think so." Olivia chided. She smiled warmly at Arabella. "I see you kept up with the lessons I taught you."

"Of course, I did." She replied smugly.

The two noble ladies laughed and walked off, leaving the stunned actress fuming in their wake.

Lauren gripped the banister, her mind whirling with plans of revenge for the noble family.

“Ms. Benefield? Is anything wrong?” Blair asked, pausing beside her.

“You.” Lauren hissed. “Do you think I don’t see what you and your sister are doing.”

Blair remained calm. “Doing?”

The actress moved quickly, twisting a hand in Blair’s hair, giving it a vicious jerk.

Blair’s stubbornness refused to allow her to cry out. Her eyes narrowed with unshed tears as she spoke in a commanding tone that every noble possessed. “Let me go. NOW.”

“Don’t think I am going to allow these childish games of yours to ruin my engagement to Tariq.” She tightened her hold on the younger woman. “I see how you look at him. Your little crush will end. He’s mine. He and this life you all live will be mine.” She smiled at her. “If you try anything, you and your sister will face my vengeance.” She pressed a kiss to her cheek. “And you cannot begin to imagine what I will do to you.”

She let her go and continued to the dining room.

Blair waited until she was no longer able to see her then slowly dropped down, trembling, to sit on the stairs. She wiped her eyes and tried to compose herself.

She was more determined than ever to see this woman destroyed.

“Blair?”

She looked up with a start. “Tariq!” She struggled to her feet. “Did you—”

“I heard everything.” He whispered. “Thank you for warning me.” He swallowed and gently smoothed her hair back. “Seeing her attack each of you, I had to fight myself to keep from trying to intervene.”

She smiled warmly at him. “You’ve always looked out for us.”

His eyes drifted over her face. “Blair, when Lauren said you have a—I mean, do you—”

She nodded. “I do. I always have.” She gripped his hand. “I always will. That’s why I had to tell you what type of woman Lauren is. I know Arabella and Olivia wanted a more dramatic reveal, but I know you. You are not the type of man who would want to cause a scandal when circumstances could be resolved quickly and quietly.”

“You know me better than anyone.” He lifted her hand to his lips. “Thank you.”

She took his arm. “Shall we go to dinner, my lord?”

“Yes.” His tone hardened with what was before him. “Let’s get this evening over with.”

**************

St Orella, Cordonia...

After wrapping up the day's shooting, Thomas searched the downstairs rooms his wife normally could be found in.

"Hudson?" He called out to the butler.

"Yes, your grace?" Hudson paused within the doorway.

"Have you seen my wife?"

"Forgive me, your grace. Lady Amanda said she was retiring early this evening."

"She wasn't ill, was she?" Thomas asked.

"Not that I am aware of, sir."

"Thank you." Thomas locked his notes in the desk drawer of the study and hurried upstairs.

He paused outside their bedroom, unsure if something had upset Amanda earlier.

She had never returned to see the next scene filmed.

He carefully opened the door and stuck his head in.

Amanda looked up from the book she was reading and smiled. "There you are. How did it go?"

His shoulders relaxed as he came in and shut the door. With a few quick strides he eased onto the bed to kiss her.

"It either went very well and you’re here to celebrate or horribly wrong and you now need encouragement." She teased when he pulled her on top of him.

"It went well." He gently caressed her cheek. "What happened earlier? You never came back."

"Nothing, I just had the desire to reread Elizabeth's diary. I wanted to make certain I had gotten her talk with Marija right." Amanda explained. "It always hurt me for her, Reginald, and Arthur to be in such torment during that dance."

His lips eased into a smile. "Everything worked out though. Elizabeth ended up with her true love. Even Arthur was able to find happiness with Marija."

"I know." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "Seeing it unfold though, knowing the anguish she felt in that moment by her own words, it just..."

She sighed. "I'm being foolish."

"You aren't." He pulled her down for a kiss. "The scene with her breaking up the duel and choosing Reginald will be one that I know will strike an emotional chord for me."

"Why that one?" Amanda slid off him and laid on her side.

Thomas turned toward her. "Because I know without that moment, you wouldn't be here."

"Thomas." Amanda captured his lips in a deep kiss. "That might be one of the sweetest things you've ever said."

He slipped his arms around her, pulling her flush against him. "Each time I read over that scene; I can't help but think of what my life would be like if you didn't exist."

Her lips curved. "You would have the life you had before we met." She gently ran the back of her fingers along his jaw. "You weren't unhappy."

"That is because I didn't know how happy I could be." He softly kissed her palm. "I was unaware how falling in love with the right person could alter one's life and outlook." He tightened his arms around her. "Now that I do, I intend on never letting you go."

"I knew what could happen if I fell in love with a man who returned my feelings." She whispered. "I just didn't realize how it would feel." She met his lips in a tender embrace. "I didn't know I could love one man with everything within me and find absolute joy in doing so."

"Amanda, if our grandchild, seven generations from now, reads your journal," his eyes met hers, "what type of story would they find?"

She slowly smiled and pressed her forehead to his. "A passionate love story filled with moments of unbridled happiness."

#and then I met you #Thomas Hunt #choices thomas hunt #thomas hunt x oc #thomas hunt x amanda #choices the royal romance #choices red carpet diaries

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waywardwrestlewritingwaif · 4 years

Text

Shelter (Part One)

I promised that I had something in the works for Jay White and I thought I’d share some of it since it’s gotten away from me a little. Thus far, I’ve written nearly 11,000 words and I have a fair chunk to go yet. (I expect that there’s another third of the story to be written. The good news is that I’ve figured out what is going to happen, whereas for a while, I was sort of waiting on the characters to tell me what was up.)

This is only the second historical piece I’ve written (the first being The Escape Route, which was also the first piece of fiction I posted here) and I know that there are inaccuracies in it. The setting is northern England in the high MIddle Ages (13th-14th century) but I’ve assigned the place names and titles sort of randomly.

Up front, I’ll confess that a number of people may find this section dull. It’s more of a “setting everything in place” part. This information will come in handy in subsequent sections, I promise.

As to when those sections will be posted, my answer is that I’m typing as fast as I can and am actually making good progress. That means that there is definitely a lot more coming in the short term. (Of course, there may also be some other things forthcoming in the short term, but that’s a whole other thing.)

I still don’t know that I’ve posted enough stories here to warrant a master list but if you’re curious, all the fiction I write is tagged “wayward wrestle writing”.

Pairing: Jay White x OFC (first person)

Word count: 3,933

Content advisory: Literally nothing in this part. Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to you. Seriously.

Married life was not what I had envisioned. My sister Elizabeth and I were taught to read as children and among the texts we’d devoured were the increasingly popular French romances. I understood that marriages were not like those stories. My older cousins, male and female, had had their marriages arranged by their families and usually didn’t meet their wife or husband until the day of the marriage. Nevertheless, Elizabeth and I both dreamed of being wooed and won, perhaps by a knight returning home from the wars abroad, or by a handsome noble traveling in disguise across the countryside. As our time came closer and our parents sought to finalize arrangements for us to marry, we hoped that we would at least find ourselves with a husband who would treat us as a friend and partner. But we secretly still held out hope for the dashing hero.

As the elder, Elizabeth was married first, to the Earl of Louth, a vastly wealthy and powerful man whose connections saw him well received even by the King. Rumor had it that he had personally funded several of His Majesty’s military campaigns. Their wedding was a more sombre affair than others I had seen, with few minstrels and a longer mass, for her new husband was very devout and preferred something that honored the solemnity of their union. Nevertheless, her letters to me indicated that he did not impose his conservatism on her, and saw to it that she had ladies to keep her company, musicians to entertain her, and whatever books, clothes and jewels she could wish for. His avuncular indulgence became even greater when she bore him a son in the spring following their marriage.

I knew I could not expect my own husband to hold such a high position since Elizabeth was the heir to our family’s estates and fortune. However, our stature was such that even a connection with us was desirable, especially for newly created gentry who sought to legitimize their positions. My father had found such a man but he died from fever before the marriage contract could be made. Eventually, I was given to Symon, the fifth and youngest son of the Duke of Cumbria. While he, like I, had no expectation of inheritance, he was more able to take care of me and his father was eager to reinforce his flagging influence by forging an alliance with a family in another part of the north.

I tried not to be disappointed with Symon when I met him but he was immediately a hard man to love. Still young, his body showed the signs I had come to recognize as the result of heavy drinking and little sleep. His pale skin had crimson blooms over the cheeks and nose and his body was unevenly distributed, with thin limbs and a bloated belly. When I touched him, I was reminded of the texture of cloth left in the rain: limp and saturated.

When I was moved to his estate in the eastern reaches of his father’s sphere, I soon found that he was indeed saturated most of the time. Our home was a constant stream of guests seeking nothing but a place for a good time and to indulge their vices. It became clear that our marriage had been a project of the Duke’s and that Symon had no interest in having a wife or being a husband. Nor did he have any skill at running a household and so it fell to me to manage as best I could, ensuring that we had all we needed, that our lands were tended to and that we maintained good relations with the other nobles and landowners. It was difficult, especially at first, since many of the servants spoke with an accent I could barely understand. After a few weeks of forced sociability, I barely saw my husband.

I asked him on numerous occasions to allow me to invite Elizabeth and her family to visit, however he disliked the idea that he might have to play the host and refused. Nor would he allow me to accept one of her many invitations to visit her. I knew that what he really feared was their judgment, which would be harsh. Elizabeth would despise him for the way in which he treated me and her husband would be appalled by his louche lifestyle.

Most worrisome was that Symon showed no interest in fathering children, despite his father’s obvious desire for him to do so. A child would truly bind our families. Nevertheless, while my sister was delivered of a second son by a man with grey hairs in his beard, my young husband refused to touch me. I overheard gossip among the servants that he said I was barren. I knew enough to understand that this could not be the case, or at least that he had no way of knowing, but it was troubling because I was of no use to the family if I could not bear children. If I could not fulfill that one obligation, the Duke would order his son to set me aside so that he could forge another alliance.

Thus were many of my days spent in anxiousness, unsure of what I was doing to drive my husband away while at the same time praying that I might be able to accept him despite his failings. My letters to my sister were my sole outlet, although my lady-in-waiting Hannah was some comfort.

It was late autumn when the spare routine of my life was interrupted in the dead of night. Hannah and Branwen, one of the house maids, arrived in my chambers, waking me none too gently to tell me that a travelling party had arrived unexpectedly.

“If there are guests, you need to bring them to his lordship,” I grumbled, wiping sleep from my eyes. “His companions have nothing to do with me.”

“His lordship is indisposed,” Hannah responded, pinching her features to indicate her distaste. “And I do not believe these are kin or companions of his.”

“His lordship is always indisposed. And I am expecting no one, certainly not at this time of the night.”

“”Begging your pardon, ma’am,” Branwen interjected, “but the watchman says that the woman says she’s your sister. And the carriage bears the crest of the Earl of Louth.”

This roused me immediately, of course. I directed Hannah to fetch some robes so that I could appear at least somewhat decent and told Branwen to send word to the watch that the party was to be admitted. My heart pounded fast in my chest because I knew already that there must be bad news. Elizabeth would never arrive unannounced like this under normal circumstances. Nevertheless, I also felt excited at the prospect of seeing her again.

When I was finally ready, I descended the stairs to the great hall where Elizabeth stood at the center of a small party, less than a dozen. Neither her husband nor her children were with her, only servants and guards.

“Have you been unwell?” she asked sharply.

“No, not at all. I’m perhaps a little tired.”

She extended an arm and pinched my chin, turning my face for her inspection.

“Your complexion looks like you haven’t seen the light in weeks.”

“Elizabeth,” I insisted, pulling back from her grip, “I am fine. And while I am thrilled to receive you, I am a little confused as to what brings you here.”

“Should I stable the lady’s horses, ma’am?” the watchman asked nervously.

“Yes.”

“No,” Elizabeth contradicted. “We’ll not be staying long enough to warrant it.”

For the first time, she pulled me close and I felt her hands tremble on my shoulders.

“Ella,” she whispered, using my pet name as she always did, “mother and father are both taken ill. It struck him first and then her. No one seems to know what it is but they’re both sick. The Steward sends word that his life is in the balance. I’m on my way to them and I knew you would want to come.”

It would have been simple enough to send word to me that I should return home, however by now Elizabeth knew that going anywhere for me was going to present a problem. She had gone significantly out of her way to collect me herself, knowing that my husband would be unwilling to sanction my travel.

“You mean to continue soon, then?” I asked her, feeling a little weak at the thought of my parents suffering.

“Within the hour. And I mean to take you with me.”

The proper thing to do would be for me to summon my husband, no matter what state he happened to be in, and request his permission. I knew full well, though, that it was pointless. He would never consent to me leaving for any reason. I glanced around the room, noticing that a few of my servants had arrived to see what the commotion was. They’d be quick to tell on me if I left. But could I really risk never seeing my parents again simply to placate a man who refused to honor even the most basic tenets of our marriage?

“You’ll need some warmer clothes, my lady,” Hannah muttered, moving close to Elizabeth and I. “I shall have them brought down while the two of you are talking.

She turned a stern face to a couple of the younger girls and began issuing commands. The others stood in place, not daring to act while I was still in the room.

Hannah returned and wrapped a thick cloak around me.

“The girls will give some more to the carriagemen, if that is acceptable to her ladyship.”

“More than acceptable,” Elizabeth replied, her grey eyes sparkling. “You must be Hannah. My sister has written to me often about your kindness to her here.”

“It’s no more than she deserves, your ladyship.”

“And will you be accompanying us.”

“If my mistress will have me then yes I shall,” Hannah declared.

“Are you sure?” It was one thing for me to go running off in defiance of my husband but I never expected that Hannah would accompany me.

“I go where you go,” she said gently. “Besides, I should like to see the coast you’ve spoken of.”

Along with extra clothing and blankets for the journey, I bid the servants gather some food from the pantry for us to take with us. Elizabeth had brought what she believed she needed but I knew that the country between here and our parents’ home could be rough. Parts of it were lawless and the roads ill-tended. The going would be slower than it had been for her coming to collect me.

She was quite surprised at the condition of the roads and the land as we rode. In many places, the roads were so decrepit and narrow that the guards flanking us were forced to ride single file, slowing us down so much that we could have walked faster. I had never seen this part of the country, having taken a longer but pleasanter route after my wedding, but Hannah and some of the others had prepared me for what to expect. Forbidding and desolate as it was, there was a kind of excitement to knowing we were crossing territory that was outside the command of any lord. We felt like we were a very brave group indeed.

After two days ride, however, our party came to an unexpected halt. We heard men’s voices and then James, the senior guard assigned to Elizabeth, opened the carriage door, his face full of concern.

“I’m sorry for the delay, but it seems that there is a problem.” He nodded in the direction that we were headed and continued, “A small company of soldiers just passed us on the road. They’ve told us that the road ahead is impassable and that there have been incursions all week by the Scots. Even if we could get through, there’s a great risk you could be taken hostage or worse.”

“How long will it take us to go around?” Elizabeth cried.

I couldn’t help but give a mirthless laugh as I saw James’s face tense. “There’s no way around, Elizabeth. This is the only road through these parts. If we want to take another route, we’d have to go back six hours’ ride and then circle around well to the south, which adds another three days to the journey.”

All of us exchanged depressed looks until I thought of a possibility. “James, did the soldiers say how far ahead the road was blocked?”

“About five miles or so by their reckoning although they could not say for certain.”

“If I’m judging our position correctly, we’re not so far from Marlborough Castle, is that right?” I continued.

James smiled a little and nodded, seeing where I was headed with my inquiries. “Not so far at all, ma’am. And the road should be open as far as the spur that leads to the castle.”

“Marlborough is the seat of John White, the Earl of Barr, who is a cousin of ours,” I explained.

“A distant cousin. And I thought the Earl was dead?”

“The old Earl, yes, but you’re forgetting his son. Remember how they visited our home when we were young? There were two or three summers we passed together.”

“Oh yes, of course. I’d forgotten that was them. They were a kindly family.” Elizabeth’s face picked up immediately as she realized that things were better than they had seemed.

“There’s a small problem, thought,” James added hesitantly. “That road is narrow and steep. There’s no way the carriage is going to manage it.”

“Well, I have an idea,” I responded. “I’m a good rider and so is Hannah. Let us go with a couple of the guards on horseback. Once we’ve spoken to the Earl, we can ask him to send some men to help move everything else to the castle. And hopefully he can help us come up with a plan to get past the danger.”

“I’m not going to just sit here and wait hours for your return, Ella. I should be the one to go.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I rebuked her. “You only gave birth a few months ago. It’s dangerous enough for you to be travelling at all, let alone going on horseback through the moors. Besides, I’m the better rider.”

Elizabeth seemed to argue but then a smile spread across her lips. “Oh yes, I just remembered their son Jay. He must be the Earl now. I’m sure you’re eager to see him.”

I felt my cheeks turn hot. “I’m simply thinking of the fastest way to get us to safety.”

“And not at all of the boy you were so enchanted by the last time you saw him?”

“We were children, Elizabeth. There was nothing romantic about it.”

Hannah could not resist a quiet laugh and James looked desperately uncomfortable.

“Tell me, James,” Elizabeth asked slyly, “what do you know of the young Earl? Is he said to be very handsome?”

“Quite handsome,” Hannah piped up. “And very much sought after, as he’s never taken a wife.”

I shot her a dark look but at the same time, I felt a slight tremor in my heart. I did remember Jay White very well, despite the fact that it had been years since I’d seen him. He was a quiet boy for the most part but we had spent much of the time his family had stayed with us conversing about books and about history. It had been some time before I realized that such conversations were not common between men and women and it made me value their memory all the more.

“Myself and Henry can accompany the ladies to the castle,” James offered. “I shall leave word that if we are not back by moonrise that the driver should return to the last town and see that you are sheltered there for the night.”

“Yes,” I agreed, “because if the Earl cannot or will not help us, it would be safer to meet there to determine what is to be done.”

The narrowness and steepness of the road were bad enough but there was also a high wind that made it even more difficult. It took us well longer than I had anticipated to make the castle gate and the reception we received from the guards there did little to inspire hope. They were surly and at first unwilling to send word that we had arrived and that we were seeking shelter.

“You try my patience with this behavior,” I upbraided the head of the guard. “I will ask you a final time to tell the Earl that his cousin, the Lady Estella Fannon of Northumbria and Cumbria, seeks shelter with him for the night.”

The mention of my full title seemed to grease the locks, as a messenger was dispatched and quickly returned to say that we were to be let in. At the same time, as we passed, I was chilled by the look on the messenger’s face, as if we were game headed for a trap.

There was a lot of activity in the castle, servants scurrying about and laughter reverberating through the halls and while it made for a warm atmosphere, I also knew too well what was likely happening. At least, I told myself, I had some experience negotiating with drunken young men, even if I hadn't always been very successful at it.

Hannah cut a dubious look at me as we were ushered from the entrance hall into a large salon filled with people. As soon as our eyes adjusted to the blazing lights from the sconces and the fire, I felt James place a heavy hand on my shoulder and push himself in front of me.

Many of the guests were in various stages of undress, including at least two who appeared to be agents of the church. Mixed in with the wealthy were a number of low types including several women whose profession seemed obvious enough from their attire and demeanor. The addition of commoners to a party was something I wasnt used to but the rest felt familiar.

"My lady, you and your companion need to go back to the hall and wait while I speak to the Earl," James muttered.

"There's no point to that. I'm the one claiming kinship and the one he's met. Besides, I'm not fragile."

He still insisted on staying a step ahead of me as the curious crowd parted before us and we approached the lord of the manor.

Jay White was much changed since I had last seen him. He now wore a beard, trimmed in what I believed to be a french style, which on its own made him look more a man than the boy I remembered. However, he seemed to have changed in almost every way. His previously slender frame had filled out, which was all the more evident because he lay stretched over a sofa, his shirt undone and his muscular chest bared. I could see the bulk of his shoulders barely covered by his tunic. What was most striking, though, was the change in his expression; boyish enthusiasm and gentility had been transformed into something hard and cold, a downy chick grown into a falcon. I recognized the intelligent blue green eyes I had known but there was something unsettling about them now, something dangerous.

I tried to avert my eyes from his body in the name of modesty and to avoid looking at the woman next to him, whose clothes were in a state of disarray.

"My noble cousin, I am sorry to arrive so unexpectedly and to come to you in need. My sister and I were making our way to Northumbria but we have been advised that the road is impassable. So although it has been many years since we have met in person, I find myself forced to ask for your lordship's hospitality and assistance."

He took a long swallow from the bottle of claret in his hand, his eyes moving over me with an intensity I found difficult to bear. His gaze flitted briefly to the other members of my party but quickly returned to me before I spoke."

"My lady," he drawled in a mocking tone, "how pleasant it is to see you again, even if it is in difficult circumstances. I notice that your sister isn't with you. How is it that you came to be separated?"

"Our carriage could not manage the road down the hill and I thought it best that I go ahead with this small party while she and the others waited with the carriage on the high road."

"Goodness. I hope that she won't encounter any misadventure. The Scots have been making attacks in these parts since midsummer and the anarchy they bring creates a haven for criminals."

"All the more reason, sir, why we are forced to place ourselves at your mercy."

At the word "mercy", a sneer spread over his features and I felt like the young man who had passed the summer with us had been devoured by this vicious creature. He paused before addressing himself to his guards, who had entered behind us.

"Geoffrey, convey the two gentlemen to the visitors' quarters and the Lady Estella to the chambers in the west tower. Her handmaiden can take the room adjacent."

A look passed between master and servant that made me want to tell him that we would find our own way, as madas that seemed. But Geoffrey and his men quickly herded James and Henry away, while another guard instructed Hannah and I to follow him.

"Will you be able to send your servants to find my sister and the others?"

"I shall make sure that they are brought here before you wake in the morning."

The chambers where I was brought were considerably rougher than I would have expected. The room was small with a tiny antechamber only large enough for a bench that allowed one to sit and look out the window. The bedding was thin and the mattress made of straw that smelled damp and old. It was some time before a maid even arrived to light the fire.

"I would like to see my companion," I told the woman as she furiously worked to get the fire to take.

She said nothing but gave me a suspicious look.

"If you can just direct me to her room, I shall go speak to her myself."

I rose to leave and immediately the woman gave a loud cry. Two guards rushed in to investigate and I repeated my request to them.

"The Master decides those things. It's up to him when you all see each other."

"Well then please tell the Master to come and speak to me right away."

The guards glanced at each other with a dry laugh.

"We shall do what we can, mistress."

Whether they even conveyed my request, I did not know. I know that I sat for hours on the bench in the window, watching the moon rise in the dark sky and wondering if White's men had reached Elizabeth and the others before they headed back to the town to seek shelter for the night. When everything seemed at its quietest, I thought to try to find Hannah’s room myself, only to discover that the door to my chamber was locked.

#jay white imagine #jay white fanfic #njpw fanfic #njpw imagine #wayward wrestle writing #wrestling fanfic #wrestling imagine

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makeusfly · 4 years

Text

your heart, for all the long years of your life, has been beating in the dark.

Morning dawns in Hawaii, and Juliet is home.

Read on AO3

Juliet blinked her eyes open and, snuggled into her comforter, basked in the sunrise streaming in through her window. Twenty-four hours ago, she had woken exactly the same, but with an alarm blaring and a stone of dread in her stomach. At that moment, she'd been sure the next time she woke up she would be in a posh but impersonal hotel room, staring out the window at a foggy cityscape. Her clothing, packed neatly into suitcases, would have been too bright or too thin or too loose or too skin-baring for the weather. If she sat for breakfast in the dining room, it would be assumed she wanted tea.

She smiled. She was home, and she never had to leave if she didn't want to.

She chose to enjoy it a few minutes longer before going leisurely through her morning routine. She indulged in her softest skirt, her favorite wedges, extra time playing with the lads after filling their bowls. She started to make coffee, but reconsidered.

She could have breakfast anywhere. She made her way down to the guest house.

"Higgy!" Magnum was shirtless and squinting into the sunlight, his eyes red-rimmed and his hair uncombed. But his smile was warm. "Coffee?"

"That would be lovely," she said, following him inside.

As he poured the mugs, he said, "Rick throws a hell of a party, doesn't he?"

"It was a bit much," she admitted. "But very sweet."

She sunk into the couch like she belonged there. The mug he handed her fit perfectly within her palms, the warmth of the ceramic soothing to her skin. She breathed in the scent of it - rich and fruity, with just a hint of jasmine. A local blend then.

"Yeah, well. He's really glad you're staying." He settled into the armchair across from her. "We all are."

She raised an eyebrow over her mug. "Even if it means I'm your boss now?"

"Technically..."

"Not technically," she said. "Actually."

"All right then, Boss Lady," he said, leaning forward to set his mug on the table between them. He'd already half-drained it, and now he balanced his elbows on his knees. "What's on the docket today?"

She took her first sip, closing her eyes as the warmth slid down her throat. Of course he'd made it exactly the way she liked it.

There was a time when this silence between them would have been unbearable, when she would have rushed to fill the air between them or urged him to find something, anything to do with himself. She knew him better now. She knew he was unhurried and living for the moment in ways she was only starting to practice. And yet, she knew he would spring into action and get her hands dirty the moment it was warranted.

He was watching her when she opened her eyes again, not expectant but waiting for her cue. She crossed her legs, ready to get down to business. "I thought we could continue your training with the lads."

His brow furrowed for just a moment, somewhere between confusion and concern.

"They are technically guard dogs and, as head of security, that should fall under your purview."

He relaxed slightly, but still seemed to be holding his breath. "Whether you're here or not?"

There was a quip on her tongue, but his face reflected the same guarded ache she'd seen on the beach, when he'd been so sure they would be separated for good. She couldn't tease him about that.

"Don't be silly. I'm still Alpha. But based on previous experience, I believe it would be useful for you to be able to command them, in case there's trouble while I'm out or ill or..." She groaned at the memory. "Incapacitated."

"Yeah," he said, smiling, the tension leaving his shoulders. "That makes sense. When should we..."

"After lunch?" She smirked. "Gives you time to deal with that little hangover of yours."

He winced. "Noticed that, huh?"

"I know you, Magnum."

He chuckled and stood, gesturing towards her cup. "Refill?"

"Yes please."

She followed him to the kitchen, sitting at the counter as he refilled her mug. She let her mind wander as he pulled eggs and bacon from the fridge.

He'd snuck up on her, for sure. First he'd been a thorn in her side, then a leech, and then, surprisingly, a friend.

She hadn't known what to do with that at first. It had been a while since she'd had one - even considering Robin more an ally than anything else, afraid to ask for too much in fear of alienating him.

She could handle allies. They didn't do things for her, but for a cause they had in common. Now she had Rick, who threw a massive going away party and an even bigger one to celebrate her staying. She had Kumu, who told her the truth of things but was always on her side regardless. She had T.C., who always asked her to dance and was willing to step blindly into danger the moment she needed him. She had Gordon, who might voice his disapproval of the illegality of it all but went against his training to support her anyway.

And she had Thomas. Thomas, who promised to take care of the lads, even though he hated them. Who could read when something was wrong but let her tell him herself. Who did literally everything he could think of, down to calling in favor after favor, to help her keep her home. Who always encouraged her to put herself out there but still, somehow, respected her boundaries.

"I'm glad you aren't going anywhere," he said, starting the eggs. "But do you ever miss it?"

"London?"

"Yeah."

She didn't have to think about it. "Of course I do. Sometimes."

He was nodding as he cooked, and she could tell he was listening despite the fact that he wasn't looking at her at all. Which was good, since she wasn't sure she could mask her expression as she scrambled for words to explain.

How could she make him understand just how wrong she felt growing up there? Like she was watching her schoolmates through a glass, unable to quite connect the way everyone else seemed to. How much effort it had taken to finally build a persona she could live with that allowed her to navigate her teenage years and finally find a place. How, from the outside, it looked like she fit in just fine, but she was always waiting for the day they discovered her falsehood and sent her packing.

She shook her head. Those were old wounds, wounds that had been made worthwhile when her abilities had gotten her hand-picked for MI6. Wounds that had scarred over when she became an adult and re-christened London in her own way.

Now there was only one wound that mattered.

"But it hasn't been home since Richard died," she finally said, biting her lip. "Honestly, I...I didn't think anywhere would be home again. So when I thought I would have to leave..."

She swallowed against the lump in her throat, unable to describe how frightened she'd been. How she finally felt like she didn't just fit, she belonged, and taking her away would have left broken pieces of herself in the Juliet-shaped hole she was leaving behind. Magnum, reading her silence, turned his body to face her while still stirring the eggs.

"We weren't letting you go without a fight."

She was grateful when he turned back to begin plating, as she started to tear up. She tried to blink them back, but her eyes were taking orders from her heart, which was full to bursting and no longer listening to her.

Juliet didn't fall in love with Richard so much as walk into it. Growing up in the shadow of the world's most tragic romantic heroine, she decided young that she would make her own destiny. For most of her life, that meant choosing friends carefully and crafting her role in the group and avoiding meaningful romantic entanglements at all costs.

But the life of a spy was lonely, so she chose to find someone to share it with. Richard was a good man, who made her laugh and put her at ease in ways no one else could. Besides, MI6 said "no outside attachments," she followed the letter of the law if not the spirit of it.

Juliet loved Richard on purpose, but that didn't make it any less magical. He'd made her feel safe and loved and valued, not just for what she could do, but for who she was. For the first time, she could see a future beyond her duty, a life she chose not because it was right, but simply because she wanted it.

When she lost him, her future went with him. All she could do was live, day by day, and guard herself so she never felt that much pain again. She would need companionship - she didn't want to be lonely again either - but love was off the table.

And then Thomas showed up.

Initially, she'd seen him as an overgrown child, easily distracted and always playing. Then she'd discovered how intelligent he actually was, how good, how far he was willing to go to help a stranger, how loyal he was to his friends. How gentle he was with her when she made a mistake. How much effort he put into considering her feelings. Rash and impetuous, sure, but always with the best of intentions.

She hadn't been able to stop herself. In fact, she hadn't even known it was happening.

Just as Magnum was setting the plate in front of her, she noticed her hands were trembling. She took a few deep breaths and smiled, standing.

"Thank you, but I really should be-"

"Juliet," he sighed, his hand still on the plate but his eyes locked on hers. She swallowed hard, straining to keep her expression neutral. But seeing his, vulnerable and tired, made her heart ache.

"I would have married you," he said, voice deep and thick with emotion. She smiled, nodding.

"I know. I know, Magnum. And I can't begin to tell you-"

He shook his head, knowing she was thanking him again. Knowing that wasn't the point. "No, I..." He kept the counter between them like a shield. "At first, it was just to help you out, but the closer it got, the more I realized...it was actually pretty selfish. I just...couldn't stand the thought of you being gone."

She smirked to disguise how touched she was. "Yes, Gordon did say you confessed to being useless without me."

He chuckled. "Yeah, you definitely make me better at my job. It's why I asked you to be my partner. And I would hate to give that up, but if that's what it took to keep you here, it still would have been worth it."

She hadn't been lying when she told the lads how fragile he was, and she thought it might make him the bravest man she knew. It never stopped him from opening himself up.

It made her feel like she could be brave too.

"Not to me," she whispered, and saw his face fall before rushing onwards. "Our partnership - our friendship - is very important to me, and I didn't want to strain that with dishonesty. Or risk your livelihood. Gordon was right: if we were caught, you could lose your license, and then where would you be?"

"I tried to tell you: all of those things could be figured out. As long as you were here, we were gonna work it out."

She swallowed roughly, unable to meet his eyes. "I know. I know. But also...Thomas, you're such a romantic. You have so much love in you, and I couldn't be the one to stop you from finding someone to give that love back to you. I couldn't."

Higgins had thought nothing would ever surprise her more than "We could get married," but what came out of him now beat it.

He laughed.

"No offense, Higgy," he said, coming around the counter to face her properly. "But I don't think you know me as well as you think you do."

She rolled her eyes. "Are you going to tell me you aren't a hopeless romantic?"

"No," he granted with a tilt of his head. "You got that part right."

"Then what-"

He took a step closer, raising an eyebrow as he invaded her space. "Juliet," he said firmly, his hands gently cupping her elbows.

Her breath hitched.

"Think about this way: I was willing to call in favors from Noshimuri, Robin, but when T.C. stepped up to help, I...kinda threw a fit."

"I assumed-" She swallowed. "I assumed it was a wounded ego. Yours is remarkably fragile."

He shook his head, conceding the point. "I tried to sell that to Rick and T.C. last night, but they weren't buying it. It got me thinking..." His smile was teasing but his eyes were serious. "We've come a long way, Higgy."

"We have," she agreed slowly, her eyes narrowing. "But I think...we've got a little further to go."

Nodding, he took a step back, holding his arms up in surrender.

With another man, that may have been the end of it. Or he may have doubled down and needled her until she said yes. But while Thomas could tease her relentlessly and push her in ways no one else did, she knew what he was going to say before he said it.

"I'm here. When you're ready."

On the surface, he was nothing like Richard. But deep down, he was just as good, just as steady.

Hawaii was nothing like London, but there was room in her heart for both. And while London was the past, and she couldn't say for sure what her future was, Hawaii was her present. She was going to take her time. She was going to enjoy it.

She stepped forward and briefly kissed his cheek, his gaze on her like sun kissing her skin. "I know patience isn't your virtue, Magnum," she teased. "I'll try not to make you wait too long." She meant it.

"Whatever it takes," he said, and he meant it too.

The future had been nothing but darkness for so long, but it was starting to take a bright, fluid shape, like a wave coming slowly to meet her. Or maybe the present was just shining a light on her path. Yes, she liked that image. She didn't have to see where, exactly, the light was leading. She just had to keep moving towards it.

"One o'clock," she said, making her way back through the living room. "Main house. Don't be late."

"Yes ma'am."

As she shut the front door behind her, she stepped off the porch and into the yard. Across the grounds, Kumu caught her eyes as she walked leisurely across the beach. She waved and Juliet, grinning, waved back.

She'd buried her heart away when Richard died, unwilling to hurt like that again. But with her family at her side, maybe it would be all right to expose its tender recesses to the sun once again.

#magnum pi #Miggins #miggy #magnum x higgins #my fanfic #long post

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jaehyunsuh · 4 years

Text

trust

—pairing: idol! Taeyong x reader

—genre: au/ fluff/ boyfriend! Taeyong

—words count: + 1k

summary: for a long time you have felt pretty lonely and sad, yes you have friends and stuff but they always are making comments that make you feel upset or uncomfortable and sometimes they don't even seem to care about what you think or say. In university some people are really nice but the majority just use you since you are so kind to everyone, you don't want to change your personality since you know it's better to help people and be nice rather then treat them like sh*t. You just need a friend, someone you can trust and tell your problems to, hopefully you will find it soon. You could talk to your boyfriend Taeyong but he is already so stressed with his idol life, that is enough to him.

today you were able to get out early from your job so you decide to walk home, so like that you can explore the city, look at the the people, breathe fresh air and clear your mind a bit. You usually take a taxi or something because you are tired but it's 4pm and the weather it's nice so it seems like a good day to go for a walk.

lately you have felt pretty lonely, people lately hasn't been the best to you lately, since you are so smart and offer to help people when you say no they start telling you mean stuff and are so stupid, you really don't mind about people's comments or anything but having no one to talk to makes you overthink stuff, by luck you distract yourself cooking, painting and working so like that it doesn't affect your mental health.

Taeyong is the best boyfriend you could ask for but you are used to be the one who gives him advices and makes him feel better since he is constantly under stress, so you decide not to overwhelming with your problems and keep them to yourself.

you walk past a buddhist temple you have seen before but never were curious of walking, you have never been really religious or anything but today you felt like visiting it, those structures were big, beautiful and amazing, it truly left you impressed. You walk and see some tourists looking outside the place, you are able to see the inside if you are quiet and respectful, so you decide to climb the stairs. You see a boy bowing at the giant Buda figure inside the temple, it was really beautiful and breathtaking, he gets up and walks to the entrance were you are standing.

"Uhm excuse me." You say reaching to the boy. He looks at you scared and kind flinches. You looked at him confused.

"I'm really curious about this religion and i have never knew anything about it, so would you mind to tell me a little bit about this?." The boy's body relax a little bit looks at you up and down

"My name is y/n by the way." You extent his hand to him and he shakes it.

"I'm Daniel." He gives a sweet smile. He tells you to see somewhere around the temple so he can talk better to you.

"Well i don't really consider myself religious but buddhism sees life as a process of constant change, and its practices aim to take advantage of that. It means that one can change for the better."

"Wow, that's really beautiful." You say impressed.

"Yes, it's good! Also they practise meditation, which is a way of developing more positive states of mind that are characterised by calm, concentration, awareness, and emotions. Using the awareness developed in meditation it is possible to have a fuller understanding of oneself, other people, and of life itself." He explains.

"It really sound fascinating, how did you get into it?" You never knew there was a religion that teach such necessary and important things like those.

"Well my parents are buddhists so I've been into it since i was young. Like i said i was never really into it but since I'm 18 I've always need something to keep me mentally stable and help me relax so i started coming here often." He gives a kind smile.

"That's really cool, I'm glad you found something that gives you peace, that's really what i need right now." You sigh.

"Well if you are not into religion you can do yoga, start meditating by yourself or you can talk to me!" He suddenly changes and starts being more open and friendly.

"Thank you, you are so nice. I think ill take all three." You laugh.

you continue to talk about your stuff and you tell him all the things that you have been feeling lately, he gave you some advices here and there about how to distract yourself from those negative thoughts and move on from this toxic people. You feel so thankful that this total stranger it's actually listening to you and being interested in what you have to say. You talked about college, your job, the music you're into and how you how much you love painting and cooking.

"Well, thank you so much for telling me about this, i found it pretty interesting."

you decided to exchange numbers and talk with each other, he said that every time he could go to the buddhist temple he will meet you outside and talk to you and maybe go and eat something. You have been seeing each other for around one month now and it has really helped your mental state, he teach you some breathing excercises that helped your anxiety and tried to meet a couple timed at week to do yoga.

Taeyong's POV

y/n has been kinda weird lately, she doesn't talks or says any important stuff to him anymore, she just talks about college stuff and the netflix show she is watching, also she goes out almost everyday and comes back later at afternoon, so it is making him Taeyong worried if she is seeing someone else. He doesn't want to sound mean or anything but he knows y/n doesn't has friends anymore, just the ones back in her country, but here in Seoul many people has been fake, treat her bad and been fake because she is dating and idol. He tries not to overthink and keep trusting his girlfriend.

"Hey Tae, we need to talk to you." Johnny says.

"Okay?"

"Hyung, y/n has been kinda weird lately she doesn't even wants to talk to us that much." Jaehyun sits down in the couch.

"We all talked and we wanted to tlwt you know that our friends and their friends have seen y/n hanging around with some guy." Taeil says. Taeyong looks shocked and like it's about to cry.

"We didn't believe it until Mark told us what he saw today." Taeil continues.

"What did you saw?" Taeyong takes a deep breath and close his eyes.

"I was walking around the Han River and i saw them sitting around there." Mark says upset. Taeyong close his hands frustrated.

"But look, we aren't saying she is cheating, maybe it's her collage partner or something." Jaehyun says trying to make his friend happy.

"Yes, and when i saw them they weren't holding hands and not even were so close to each other."

"Bro, she loves you and instead of thinking about breaking up ask her if there is something else making her distracted." Yuta pats his friends back.

Taeyong grabs his jacket and makes his way to y/n's apartment, he calls 3 times and she doesn't picks up which makes him worried since he is thinking about all the things that member said.

Y/n's POV

you are in the living room watching some tv when you hear Taeyong open the door.

"Y/n we need to talk." He looks like he was crying and you wonder what happened to him.

"Yes, what happened babe?."

"Y/n, you don't love me anymore? Are you cheating on me?" He ask straight up.

"No, Taeyong, what the hell? How could i ever cheat on you. You are the person i love the most." You say slightly frustrated.

"Some people are talking about you hanging out with another guy and even Mark saw you with him the other day, and the fact that you have been so quiet and don't even talk to me that much anymore, so i think I'm convinced it may be truth." He sits down and takes a deep breath trying not to look at you. Your heart breaks at seeing him like this, you know the truth and if you tell him he is gonna still feel upset.

"Taeyong listen to me, this guy is a buddhist, a met him the other day when i walked around the temple, he explained me that it helps you relax and control your emotions, i told him that i was going through a tought time and he decide to help me. He teach me how to meditate, breathing exercises and we do yoga almost every afternoon. It has helped me a lot with my stress. And that's it, he is just a friend, there is not any other relationship between us and if you want to talk to him or something I'm sire you would be more convinced." You say while holding his hands.

"And why didn't you told me about this?" He looks at you sad.

"I love you more than anything else in the world, you known i can help you and that you can talk to me about anything." He looks at you.

"Tae i know, but I'm always the strong one that is comforting you, making you feel okay and helping you. I know you have been through a lot lately and i didn't wanted to bother you with my problems while you have your owns. I'm sorry." You look at the the floor disappointed at yourself.

he grabs your lower back and pulls you into a kiss. You feel safe and peaceful again in between his arms and lips. He kisses you softly making your feel better than before and taking all your worries away.

"You can always trust me, okay?" Taeyong kisses your forehead.

"From now on, let's promise to trust each other anytime, and talk about every single thing that is bothering us. We are stronger together."

"I love you." You hug him.

"I love you too." He leaves another kiss on your forehead.

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forevermyalwaysphff · 4 years

Text

Chapter 19

A/N: I have just posted Chapter 18 (Click HERE for the chapter) so make sure you read that one first before starting Chapter 19

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"May the court hear from Mrs. Bowman''s social worker, Miss Grey." The family court judge called upon Alexa to stand and speak her recommendation on her client, Leanna Bowman's custody of her son Eddie Bowman. This had been an ongoing battle since Eddie's biological father had re-appeared into the picture and had tried to gain custody of him, which the judge had denied.

Alexa took in a deep breath and sighed heavily while she stood up and straightened her dark navy suit. "You may proceed, Miss Grey."

"Your honour. It is my recommendation as Leanne Bowman's case social worker that her child, Eddie Bowman, is to remain under her full custody." Alexa took in another breath. This was the part of her job that she did not enjoy, but due to her work with Guardian and their close contact with the domestic abuse survivors, Alexa was often called in to family court to give recommendations on custody status.

"Leanne Bowman has made tremendous strides the past five months at Guardian. She started out using our shelter services for herself and her son and has now found a safe affordable home in the local council housing inclusive of the necessities for taking care of Eddie. Leanne has continued to attend Guardian for our therapy, financial and social services which she plans to remain attending in the future. Mrs. Bowman has found a local daycare and employment within walking distance of her home." Alexa lowered her head briefly, feeling everyone in the court's eyes on her.

"Despite, Mrs. Bowman's domestic history with her ex-partner. I do recommend that Eddie continues to stay with his mother and the trial period of custody be moved to a permanent decision given that she abides by the no contact order with Mr. Turner." Alexa looked the judge in the eyes showing her confidence with the recommendation to the court.

The judge slowly nodded her head as Alexa took her seat beside The Bowman's lawyer. Alexa turned her head towards Leanne who was displaying a grateful expression towards her. She simply smiled and turned her attention back towards the judge as she deliberated.

Alexa felt a light tap on her shoulder from behind. She angled her body to find Eddie being his adorable self dressed in a little suit with a green polka dotted bow tie. His little contagious smile was beaming up at her. "Do I get to stay with my mommy?" He whispered to Alexa.

Her heart sank in his chest seeing his chocolate brown hopeful eyes staring up at her waiting for a reply. "I don't know yet, hun. We have to wait for the nice lady up at the front to tell us." Alexa noticed that he started to get worried that he would not be able to go home with his mom today. Even though he was quite young, he understood what was going on as this was not his first time being in a courtroom like this. Alexa suddenly felt a healthy level of doubt in her suggestion. Was it really the right decision for Eddie? Or was it the right decision for Leanne?

"Want me to come back and sit with you while we wait?" Alexa shook the thought from her mind and focused on Eddie.

He did not waste a second in replying. "Yes please!" Eddie politely asked Alexa and she immediately stood up and snuck around to sit next to him.

The judge had returned to the courtroom after a short recess to deliberate her decision. The deafening silence in the courtroom was profound as nearly everyone was on the edge of their seats awaiting the verdict on the custody of Eddie Bowman.

Alexa closed her eyes as the judge started to speak. There was a gut feeling that had grown inside of her at the last minute that Eddie should not be with his mother. The problem was it was only a gut feeling and she racked her mind searching and searching for any little doubt in her mind that matched this innate feeling.

"Congratulations Leanne Bowman. You have full custody of your son Edward Bowman. There will be a review period in six months to ensure that you are adhering to the set out rules of this custody agreement including the no contact order with Mr. Turner." The judge disclosed her ruling and everyone in the courtroom was happy with the outcome, except for Alexa. But, she stood up and displayed a soft smile watching Eddie run to his mom and give her a big hug.

Leanne turned around to face Alexa and opened her arms to pull her into a tight embrace. "Thank you Alexa. This wouldn't have happened without you." She gratefully thanked Alexa for her help, but those words felt heavy in her mind as she repeated them.

"You are welcome. Please take care of him." Alexa softly encouraged Leanne to remain true to her promise.

Alexa exited the courthouse walking out of the main entrance down the steps when all of a sudden she was ambushed by a few paparazzi that had gotten wind that she was appearing in court today. The ambush startled her and pulled her from her deep internal debate.

"You are one hard person to find Miss Grey." One of the men shouted as they continued to photograph her down the steps of the courthouse.

The blonde remained silent, giving them no response as she continued to look to the ground and concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other, being careful not to get pictured falling down these stairs in her heels.

Alexa had been quite clever recently in avoiding the paparazzi thanks to tips from her boyfriend, Harry. But, she figured they would find her again eventually only wishing that it wasn't today. She dug in deep and found a source of courage to get through the next few minutes until she could escape them. One thing that Harry had taught Alexa to get away from them was to quickly get into a taxi even if only for a few minutes away to get some distance between the paps and her.

The blonde spotted a taxi stand nearby and purposefully stepped towards it. She motioned to the man standing in front of the black taxi that she wanted a ride.

"Alexa can you tell us who will be your plus one to Princess Eugenie's wedding?!" They shouted at Alexa as she climbed into the back seat and closed the door. But, a hand grabbed the door frame stopping it from closing.

Alexa glanced up at the man attempting to stop her from getting away from them. Her green eyes glared up at him as they locked into his gaze. "Let go of the door now. Or you will be hearing from my lawyers." She threatened him in hopes that he would remove his hand.

He slowly removed his hand and Alexa slammed the door shut. She drew in a shaky breath, feeling like she had been holding her breath for a long time. Closing her eyes she told the taxi driver her destination, deciding to take the full ride over to meet her friend for afternoon tea.

"Can you take me to Fortnum and Mason please."

--------------------------------

"Hello ma'am. Do you have a booking with us for tea this afternoon?"

Alexa was greeted at the front entrance to the tea room at Fortnum and Mason. "Yes, I believe it is under Victoria Sutton." She was meeting Victoria, a friend of hers from Alexa's past relationship with Reese Kellington.

"Right this way." Alexa followed the hostess into the tea room towards an awaiting Victoria.

Victoria spotted Alexa in her line of vision making her face light up with a beaming grin as she stood to greet Alexa. "Ah! Lexi!" The blonde pulled Alexa in to greet her with a traditional kiss on the cheek before hugging her small frame.

"Hi, Victoria. How are you?!" Alexa matched her friend's beaming smile. She pulled out the chair from her spot and took her seat while the hostess handed them their menus.

"I am well, how are you? It has been so long since I have last seen you!" Victoria locked in Alexa's green eyed gaze.

Alexa had met the Sutton Hotel heiress through her ex Reese. She had become close with the blue blooded aristo even though she initially thought it would be an unlikely friendship. But, when Alexa and Reese ended their relationship, Alexa distanced herself from nearly everyone associated with Reese including the friends she had made during that time. A part of her felt guilty for simply disappearing but at the time, it was what she needed to do for herself.

"I know it's been so long. I was really happy to hear from you last week." Alexa smiled genuinely. "I am sorry for just disappearing after everything." She began to apologize. "I know there is no explanation that justifies that... but I had to do -"

"You had to do it in order to survive." Victoria nodded displaying a genuine expression of understanding. "I heard what Reese had done... I don't blame you at all or harbor any ill will towards you at all. That is why I reached out to you. I missed you and our friendship." Victoria reached her hand out and squeezed Alexa's in a gesture of reassurance.

"Thank you, Vic." Alexa was feeling extremely guilty over her past decision. But, she desperately wanted to catch up with Victoria.

"Anyway, let's not talk about that bastard." Victoria waved the subject off. "Let's enjoy our afternoon tea and you can tell me all about your life! I hear you are going to be in a royal wedding this summer?! That is so exciting!"

Alexa giggled lightly. "Yeah, I am and everyone knows it. I even nearly got followed here by the paps!" She sighed heavily remembering the man trying to stop her taxi moments before she arrived.

"Oh god! They can be absolutely horrendous Lex!" Victoria's posh British accent came forth. "You have to be careful. I can give you some tips on how to deal with them if you want?" Alexa's friend kindly offered to her as she had her fair share of experiences with them due to her family's standing.

"Awe, thank you Vic. I appreciate that." Alexa started to scan the menu. "But, my boyfriend has been helping me handle them."

"Ooooh! Your boyfriend?" Victoria lifted her head up from the menu. "Who is it?! You have to tell me everything."

Alexa had put her foot in her mouth not realizing the extent to what she had just revealed. She started to backtrack and down played the whole thing. "I meant he is just making sure I don't come home crying every night!" She tossed her head back with nervous laughter.

"Are you ladies ready to order or do you need a few more minutes?" The waiter came at the perfect time to interrupt their conversation.

"I think we are ready?" Victoria lifted her head to make brief eye contact with Alexa and saw her nodding a response. "Go ahead Lex."

"Uh, I am going to get the Champagne Afternoon tea with the mable peach tea." Alexa lifted her head to glance up at the waiter then to Victoria.

"That is a perfect choice ma'am." He turned towards Victoria. "Ma'am what can I get for you?"

Victoria flipped through the tea choices one more time. "I will also get the Champagne Afternoon tea with the Rose Pouchong tea."

"Great ladies. I will be back shortly with your orders." The waiter took his leave.

"So... tell me about this boy!" Victoria was grinning from ear to ear as she brought back the subject Alexa was desperately trying to avoid.

Alexa squirmed in her spot unsure of whether to divulge the fact that Victoria already knew her boyfriend, Prince Harry. In fact, she was one of his childhood friends and knew him quite well according to Harry, but they lost touch after he left Eton. She had talked with Harry late last night as she laid awake in bed nervous about today's court appearance and told him she had plans to go have tea with Victoria Sutton afterwards.

The prince was quite taken back to find out that she was friends with Victoria, but he was also supportive of her to go to the tea and reconnect with one of her friends. Especially someone he knew who was known to keep her intentions true.

"Well, he is pretty great actually." Alexa was now beaming remembering last night's conversation with him. "He has really taught that it is ok to take a chance at love again and that not all men are like Reese." She confessed to Victoria.

"Awe." Victoria was taking in Alexa's expression in front of her knowing that it was one of true happiness. She had become quite worried about Alexa when she quite literally fell off the face of the earth after Reese and Alexa ended their relationship. The problem was that Victoria had been friends with both of them and quite frankly did not know who to be supportive of. But, when she found out more about what Reese had done to Alexa, she immediately took a step back from her friendship with him. Victoria had attempted to contact Alexa, but she simply did not reply until now. She never held any ill will towards the blonde beauty for doing this and simply wanted to be there for her friend who she knew was going through a very difficult time.

"I love to see you so happy again, Alexa. You can really tell that you are with whoever this man is." Victoria watched Alexa's smile grow even wider at her comment. "How long have you two been together?"

"We were friends at first, but have been dating since May." Alexa was starting to find that comfortable trusting feeling that she had initially shared with Victoria and what had drawn Alexa to her in the first place. Despite Victoria's aristocratic status with her father owning a major international hotel corporation and her mother being a daughter of the current Duke of Somerset, she never did flaunt her status like most aritos did. She even started her own fashion line that had been receiving raving reviews and even has a few store fronts on the major streets of London.

"That is seriously so great. I cannot wait to meet him!" Victoria excitedly clapped her hands.

The two of them were enjoying their afternoon tea, catching up as if no time had lapsed between the last time they had seen each other. Victoria took a bite of her clotted cream and strawberry jam topped scone before leading the conversation down to a place Alexa did not want to go to. "You know, I am seriously so happy to see that you have moved on too like Reese has done." It was an innocent comment, but one that made Alexa quite curious.

Alexa was hesitant to ask, not entirely wanting to know more details about Reese's current relationship, but curiosity got the best of her. "Reese has moved on too?" She probed a bit wondering if she could get it out of Victoria who he was currently with though Alexa had a good guess who it was.

"Yeah, he's been with Gemma Andrews for a while now."

Alexa dropped her knife as it clattered against her plate.

Gemma Andrews. The name repeated in her mind.

Reese had admitted that he had cheated on Alexa with Gemma not once, but multiple times in their relationship. Gemma was often the one at the forefront of his group of friends belittling her every chance she could get. Alexa was hit with a wave of emotions that nearly knocked the wind right out of her. Those same soul crushing emotions that shook her to her core. How could he do that to her? Did Reese have no respect whatsoever towards her? But, then again he never truly did care about her like she had him.

Victoria had realized what she may have done. "Oh, Lex. I shouldn't have said anything..." She bore witness to the pain etched across Alexa's face that replaced the happy expression she held moments prior.

"No, I needed to know." Alexa shook her head and bit her lips to hold back her tears. "Gemma was the woman he repeatedly cheated on me with, Victoria." She admitted with tears brimming over her eyes.

"I am so sorry..." Victoria felt awful for bringing this up to Alexa. "I - I didn't know that." She closed her eyes and shook her head at Reese. "She was always so vile towards you."

Alexa swallowed the lump in her throat and held back her tears not wanting to ruin her time with Victoria. "Let's just move on from it and have fun."

"Yes, let's." Victoria waved over a waiter. "Can we have another bottle of Champagne please?"

---------------------------------

Alexa had found herself walking aimlessly around Hyde Park being trapped deep into her thoughts about everything that had happened today and everything that she had been struggling with as of late. She was supposed to be home by now and spending time with Harry who had come up for the weekend to stay at her place. Pulling out her phone she had several missed calls and voicemails from Harry and she knew that her late return would only worry him further. To be fair, she had no idea it had gotten this late.

She listened to the last voicemail he had sent her.

"Alexa. Where are you? You are really starting to worry me. It's nearly 8pm and you should have been home hours ago... I took Peanut for a walk and fed her." He sighed deeply as his voice trailed off. "Love, let me know you are ok and where you are. I can come get you." The concern laced in his voice was evident and Alexa felt guilty for making him feel that way.

She immediately brought up his number and started to call him. The phone only rang once before he answered it like he had been waiting for her call.

"Alexa?" His deep voice sounded over the other line.

The mere sound of his voice was enough for Alexa to nearly break. She closed her eyes and felt tears starting to stream down her cheek while she breathed in a strangled breath. "Can you come get me?" She sniffled and wiped her tears away.

"Where are you?" He did not hesitate after hearing her cries over the phone.

Alexa glanced around. "I am in Hyde Park by the Serpentine I think..." She released a sob.

"I'm coming."

Alexa was sitting on a park bench when she lifted her head and saw a man walking towards her wearing a cap. She breathed out and stood up slowly knowing that it was Harry attempting to disguise his identity in such a public space.

"Alexa." He closed in the rest of the distance between them and pulled her into a hug feeling her clinging tightly to him. The immediate security that Harry gave her in that moment was something she held onto, not wanting to let go of him and that feeling that surrounded her. She buried her head into the crook of his neck and released a heavy sigh as he gently stroked his fingers through her blonde locks.

She lifted her head up and locked in the prince's concerned gaze. His brow was furrowed and his deep blue eyes were filled with worry. Harry had no idea what was going on with her, yet here he was. He lifted his hand and cupped her cool cheek to tenderly stroke it. "Are you ok?" His voice broke through her thoughts and pulled her out from the depths of his deep blue eyes.

She struggled to answer his question not wanting to lie to Harry, but also not wanting to cause more concern for him. Alexa felt her tears betray her as they trickled down her cheek giving Harry his answer. "I am now." She whispered quietly to him. "Will you take me home?"

Harry brushed away her tears and nodded silently. "I'm parked a short walk from here. Let's get you home." He grasped her hand and clasped their fingers together interlocking them as they made their way to Harry's car. The prince led Alexa out of Hyde Park being careful to avoid contact with others hoping that his cap would hide his identity.

He opened the back car door and motioned for Alexa to crawl in first to which he quickly followed suit. Sitting down next to his girlfriend he looked up in the drivers mirror at Magnus, his protection officer, giving him a quick nod that they were ready to leave.

The prince felt Alexa snuggle in beside him and grasp his arm before laying her head to rest on his shoulder. He placed a comforting touch on her knee being finally able to take her all in. A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips seeing how sexy she was in her suit she had picked for her court appearance today.

"You look beautiful today." He leaned in and pressed his lips softly to her temple. An adorable smile formed on her lips, one that he knew himself placed there.

"Thanks baby." Alexa peaked up at him, staring into his eyes. "Thank you for coming to get me. I didn't mean to worry you..." She gave him a peck on the lips.

"You did really worry me, love." His brow furrowed with concern, but this only caused Alexa to turn her head away from him and avert her gaze. Clearly she was not ready to talk to him about what happened today.

"Hey... hey." He coaxed Alexa's attention back on him. "You don't need to tell me what happened until you want to ok?" Harry watched a silent Alexa nod her head. "Why don't we pick up some take out and just throw on a movie at your place and cuddle? How does that sound?"

Alexa's lips pulled into a soft smile. "That sounds perfect, Harry. What do you want to pick up?"

Harry shrugged his shoulders. "You choose, babe. Doesn't matter to me."

She shook her head no. "I want you to get something you enjoy. You don't really get to when you are in Suffolk."

"Alright..." Harry pondered for a moment. "Shall we get take out from that Greek place from down the street from your flat?"

"Oh, yes!" Alexa was thrilled with Harry's choice. "Can we get a side of pita and tzatziki sauce?!"

"Anything you want!"

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Harry shifted into a comfortable position and helped Alexa crawl into the same space he created for her on the sofa. They had picked out a movie together and cuddled up into each other with a cozy blanket covering them.

He would occasionally glance down at Alexa and notice that even though she was staring straight ahead at the TV, she wasn't actually watching the movie. Rather that she was caught in an internal debate in her own mind. The prince leant down and kissed her exposed shoulder wanting her to know that he was here for her. Alexa's response was cuddling back further into him.

A few minutes later, Alexa suddenly sat up and turned around to face Harry. She held her head down low and started to fidget with her hands nervously. "I'm sorry about today...." Alexa quietly whispered. "I -" She breathed out deeply. "I have been struggling lately Harry..." Alexa's confession caused Harry to sit up straight and reach across her to grab the remote and pause the movie.

"Talk to me love." He gave Alexa his full attention.

"I don't even know where to begin." She softly whispered as she felt the weight of her confession slowly consume her as if the revelation was taking control of her body and finally seeping out of her from holding in for so long. Her head lifted to glance up at Harry showing a wounded expression.

The prince's heart dropped in his chest seeing the visible pain etched across her face. This was not the woman he had come to know. All he could do was listen to Alexa and try to help her in any way he could. "Just start somewhere and go from there, babe. We have all night and I am all yours for the weekend." He grasped her hand and squeezed in reassuringly. A tiny smile peaked through her wounded expression giving Harry a bit of hope.

"Well, today I just had an awful day really and it was sort of my tipping point." Alexa began. "First, at court I read my recommendation for Eddie's custody hearing and I thought what I recommended was right... but then I had this awful sinking feeling that he should not be with his mother." Alexa was clearly bearing the weight of this decision. "I couldn't find a reason why all that it was just a gut feeling that I had. I never wish to take a child away from their mother, but I can't help but feel something is going to happen, Henry, and I feel sick about it. If anything happens to Eddie..." She choked out tears and nearly broke down in front of Harry right there.

Harry grabbed her shaking body and enveloped his arms around her. "Lex. You weren't the only one saying Eddie was ok to stay with his mom. The judge would have decided based on all the information she was given and though your recommendation had a part, it was not the only part to play." He tried his best to comfort her, but he knew that she was only getting started.

"What if something happens Harry?" She lifted her head and looked away from her boyfriend with tear stained cheeks.

"I can't tell you it won't, but for now you know he is safe. She has to check in at Guardian weekly doesn't she?" Harry tried to provide her with some reassurance.

"Yeah... I guess." She nodded her head, but she still would not look at him as her mind drifted towards the conversation with Victoria earlier that afternoon. How was she going to tell Harry about Reese?

"What else?" He encouraged Alexa to keep talking.

How do you talk to your current boyfriend about your ex and how much he has hurt you and apparently still is hurting you? Alexa desperately wanted to avoid it, but she knew she had to tell Harry.

"Please don't be mad... or get angry." Alexa swiveled her head to lock in her boyfriend's gaze.

"Alexa, why would I be angry with you? You are just telling me what you are dealing with and I hope that I can somehow help you." Harry was a bit taken back.

"You might not like what is bothering me..." She led on.

"Babe, come on just tell me. I promise you I won't." Harry tried to reassure her.

Alexa bit down on her bottom lip nervously. "I went for afternoon tea with Victoria and we started talking about how I have moved on with you from my past relationship." She paused for a moment to clarify. "Vic doesn't know you are my boyfriend, I kept that from her." Alexa wanted to make sure Harry knew that. "But, she told me that Reese had also moved on and well the person that he is with now is the same woman who he admitted to cheating on me with numerous times..." She let the words sink in again while Harry remained silent.

His girlfriend took in a shaky breath. "Hearing that he is with Gemma really threw me into the deep end again this afternoon. It's like it brought up that day all over again and somehow even though I haven't seen him for a long time, he was still able to elicit such pain and hurt from me today and I hated that." Alexa cried out with a hint of anger. "He has no right to make me feel that way anymore, but he did. You really do not understand how much he hurt me Harry..." She shook her head in shame. "Even though I am falling for you so hard for you right now. It's still so painful at times to remember." She shook her head. "I didn't want you to be angry with how he made me feel... and sometimes still makes me feel."

"Babe." He lifted her chin delicately with his finger to make Alexa look into his eyes. "I will never be angry or mad at how you feel, even if it is about what your piece of shit of an ex did to you. You have every right to feel whatever you feel and I want you to feel comfortable enough to talk to me and tell me about everything like this, not keep it inside to struggle on your own." Harry watched her eyes well up with another flood of tears. "Is this why you were walking around Hyde Park so late?"

Alexa nodded her head slowly. "I needed some time to just clear my head, but it really didn't help and then when I looked at my phone I didn't realize how late it was and that I kept you waiting for me." She wiped away a stray tear that trickled down her cheek with a balled up piece of his sweater she wore. "Then all I wanted was you..."

The prince tucked a stray piece of her blonde locks behind her ear and gently bent her forehead down towards him to place a soft kiss there. "I'm always going to be here for you, Lex."

"I know, babe."

"I just don't want to see you like this. I want to help you in any way I can." The sincerity in his voice was genuine. "Let me grab a bottle of wine and we can just sit and talk tonight instead. What do you think?"

Alexa nodded her head without a second thought. "Yah, I'd like that."

--------------------------------

Harry had his girlfriend in stitches of laughter, holding her belly and being careful not to spill her glass of wine. He was telling Alexa a story of him and his army pal Connor that he knew would make his girl fall into fits of laughter. Hearing her laughter and seeing that elated smile graced on her face was something he had missed seeing as of late. Their time together was limited and he wanted to make every second of it count.

"Oh, Harry." Alexa leaned her head back against the frame of the couch and simply took the view of him all in. How did she become so lucky and find someone like Harry to be in her life? "I am so lucky to have you in my life, babe. You literally are the best thing that has ever happened to me." Alexa closed in the distance between them and captured his wine soaked lips in a passionate, but soft kiss. "I'm happy you decided to stay here with me this weekend."

The prince smiled out of the kiss and nodded in agreement. "It worked out well that Alice is with Jay in Germany this week and I get you all to myself." He gently grabbed Alexa and pulled his girlfriend into his lap to sneak another kiss in before finding a comfortable position to cuddle with her in.

"What else is on your pretty little mind, love?" He smothered her head with a series of sweet kisses that brought a smile to her face.

"Mmmm...." Alexa giggled with a sultry look on her face.

"Oh!" Harry laughed knowing exactly what she was thinking.

"Tonight. I get you." Alexa informed Harry that he had no choice in the matter and he was completely ok with that. "But, I like sitting here talking with you like this. Can we stay here a bit longer?" She started to play with the tufts of Harry's ginger hair while he stared up at Alexa.

"Mmmm hmmm... that feels nice." He closed his eyes and sighed deeply angling his head to give her more access to play with his hair. A comfortable silence fell between them as they relished in the presence of the other's company. It was moments like this, private moments that Harry loved spending with Alexa and getting to know her better. But, he knew that there was much more on her mind that she wanted to share with Harry. "What's on your mind?" He gently coaxed it out of Alexa.

She took a healthy sip of her wine and sat back into his lap. "Eugenie." Alexa spoke his cousin's name.

"I thought so..." Harry nodded his head. "When was the last time you saw her?"

"Harry, it's been weeks." The blonde beauty sighed with a light head shake. "It is really eating me up from the inside. I don't know what to do. Have you talked to her at all?"

"No." He took a sip of his wine. "I think she is avoiding me honestly."

"I have wanted to reach out to her, Harry. I miss her in my life, she is one of my best friends. But, she makes me feel like I can't have you and be her friend when she was even the one to tell me to go out with you." Alexa took another sip of her wine. "Like I said before, I want both of you and I don't think that is being selfish, is it? My other friends have never even asked me to make that choice, ever."

"No, not at all." Harry agreed with his girlfriend. "Look, I can tell how much Eugenie means to you and she means alot to me too, love. But, this is not a one way street she also has to be the one to want this. She has to put in the effort too."

"I know love." Alexa looked down to the floor briefly then back at him. "I just miss my friend."

"She chose you to be there by her side for one the most important days of her life, Alexa." Harry sat up straighter. "I know for a fact that she still cares about you the way you care about her. I hate that I am the one thing that has put a wedge between you two. But, I am not willing to give you up so easily..." He freely spoke his mind. "I can't do that..."

"The problem though Harry is Eugenie cannot accept that I want both of you in my life. For some reason, she wants me to choose her over you... I want to be there for her in August. I really do, but I am starting to think that maybe I am not the right person and it nearly breaks me admitting that." Alexa released a heavy sigh. "That thought has been creeping up into my mind lately and I don't want to think about it, but it has. I am just at a loss of what to do..." She trailed off and became quiet. "I don't want another fight like that night... I don't want you two at each other's throats."

"Do you want to invite her over tomorrow?" Harry was willing to give up his precious time with his girlfriend to help her re-connect and fix her relationship with his cousin, Eugenie. "I am happy to leave for a few hours and see a mate or something if you want some time alone with her."

Harry was giving Alexa a very feasible option, but she didn't want that option to include having less time with him. "No... I want to spend time with you. You drove all the way from Suffolk and changed your schedule around to be with me." Alexa was extremely touched by the selfless offer Harry had given her. "Thank you though for trying to help. I know you want to make me happy."

"You have to talk to Eugenie, Alexa. One way or another."

"I know, I just don't know how to..." Her mind drifted off and so did their conversation about Eugenie.

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"Damn I missed that." Alexa giggled happily as she nestled her naked body beside the prince. The two of them had just finished being intimate with one another and it was something that they both needed. Needing it so much that they had already finished round two.

Harry's chest rumbled with laughter while Alexa rested her head on it and started to run her fingers over the contour of his abdominal muscles. He gently rubbed up and down the side of her arm finding it comforting to have Alexa next to him like this.

A smile crept up on his lips at the simple thought of how much he loved having this woman in his life. There was just something about Alexa that he was innately drawn to. He felt her take in a deep breath and sigh as her mind travelled elsewhere knowing that she was probably thinking about Eugenie.

When Alexa had come up to the Lake District and spent the weekend meeting his friends, he felt their relationship progress on to a deeper level. When he was away from her, he missed her terribly and his thoughts were never far from her. They made an effort to talk daily to one another and ensure this semi long distance relationship was going to work. He was the one that often came back on his free days to London mainly because of his commitments to his patronage and his family, but he always made time to see her. Alexa would take a Monday or Friday off and drive up to Suffolk for the weekend occasionally. The prince would let her use his office space in his home for the times she was able to stay longer into the week with him and work from home. He loved how everything was progressing in their relationship and he truly wanted Alexa to be his date to Eugenie's wedding. But, in doing so would put their relationship out there for the world to see. He was not entirely sure that Alexa was ready for that yet having admitted that she was struggling lately. Harry needed to fix something in her life this weekend and he knew exactly what he needed to do.

"Lex, I have to make a phone call I forgot to do on the way down today." He got out of bed and slipped away from her.

"At this time of night?" Alexa glanced to the clock sitting on her bedside table before getting a great view of the prince's naked ass. She leaned forward and gave it a little smack as the prince bent over to pull on his boxers that were tossed on her floor.

Harry glanced back over his shoulder at Alexa displaying a mischievous grin before a light giggle escaped her lips. "Get your hot ass back here quick."

"Yes ma'am." Harry offered her a wink before grabbing his phone off the bedside table. He took one step then turned back around to place a soft kiss to Alexa's lips.

The prince snuck out into her living room and ensured he closed the bedroom door. He sat down on a chair by the window and glanced out at the dimly lit quiet streets while he waited and continued to hear the phone ringing.

"Hello?" A tired voice answered on the other line.

"Eugenie?" Harry closed his eyes knowing that he had probably woken her up, but he had to talk to his cousin.

"Harry? It's late..." She slightly scolded him.

"I know. I know it is, but this can't wait." Harry released a deep breath. "Just give me a few minutes please."

There was a long drawn out pause on the other side of the line.

"Ok. What is it Harry?" Eugenie spoke. "I think I already know..."

"I think you do." Harry nodded slowly and then began. "She misses you Eugenie. Alexa misses having her best friend in her life. She was in near tears about it tonight and she doesn't know what to do because she feels absolutely torn between you and I."

"I miss her too..." Eugenie quietly confessed. "I miss not seeing her."

"Then call her and tell her that." Harry softly encouraged his cousin. "Can you put the past aside and accept that Alexa and I are together?" He sighed. "This fight between you and me has to end. We both want what is best for her in the end and that is her having both of us in her life. But, we can never put her in that spot again where she has to choose between you and me or we'll both lose her... and I can't..." Harry trailed off.

"I don't want her to choose between us. I only want to spend more time with her and you two are always together." Eugenie spoke freely. "There never seems to be time for me and her."

"Genie... I am only ever here on the weekends and not every weekend. We aren't even together half the time. So I don't know where you got this idea from." Harry was starting to get frustrated that her excuse was of course because of him.

"Look. I am tired of Alexa being so upset about this." Harry was firm. "Call her tonight and set up a time to see her. I'm here this weekend, but if you want to see Lex now I am fine with that."

"Is she not asleep?" Eugenie enquired.

"No... we have been up."

Eugenie laughed in response. "You two have been having sex, that is why you are up this time of night." She continued to giggle. "Ok, fine. I will call her."

"Yes, ok but can you wait like fifteen minutes so she doesn't think I had anything to do with this?" Harry pleaded.

"You really care about her, don't you?" Eugenie's voice became soft.

"More than you know, Eugenie. I have fallen hard for her." Harry confessed. "I only want her to be happy and I know she won't fully be until she has you back in her life. I am willing to do whatever it takes and if that means having to swallow my pride with you, then I am happy to."

"Let's put this to bed then. I miss having my ginger cousin around and maybe we can do some double dates?" Eugenie happily suggested.

"I am sure Lex would be fine with that." Harry giggled lightly. "Ok, I have to go. But, please wait a little bit."

"I will, Harry. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Eugenie."

Harry tiptoed back into Alexa's room to find her head on his pillow with her eyes closed. She lifted her head having heard his footsteps approach the bed. "Sorry... it couldn't wait." He pulled back the covers and Alexa shifted back onto her side of the bed until Harry got in.

They found themselves in small talk, discussing what the rest of their weekend was going to look like. She was hoping that Harry would be ok helping her fix a few things around the flat she promised Alice that she would get sorted.

Alexa's phone suddenly rang interrupting her conversation with Harry. A small questioning scowl formed on her face, wondering who was calling this late at night. "Who is calling me this late at night?" She reached over top of Harry and grabbed her phone.

"Eugenie..." Alexa sat up in bed cross legged and whispered her friend's name as she let the phone continue to ring. Her head slowly lifted to look up at Harry wondering what she should do.

"Well answer it, babe." He softly smiled.

"H- Hello?" Alexa answered her friend's call.

"Alexa? Hey, it's Eugenie. I am sorry it's late, but I was wondering if we could talk for a few minutes?" Eugenie cut straight to the point.

"Yeah, sure." A small smile appeared on Alexa's lips. "How are you?" Harry watched Alexa quietly listen to Eugenie's response. He shifted his body closer to his girlfriend and placed a hand on her thigh to gently rub.

"I am good. Been keeping busy." Alexa locked eyes with Harry. "Eugenie... I miss you. I miss my best friend." She freely admitted, but the smile that graced her lips when Eugenie confessed the same thing was one that Harry would never forget. It was one filled with pure hope, that kind of hope that you made you feel everything was going to be ok.

"I am sorry for not calling you. I didn't know what to do, but I am really happy to hear from you." Alexa tossed her head back in laughter hearing something Eugenie had said. "Yeah! Let's do that. Off the top of my head, I am pretty sure that I am free Tuesday evening."

"That sounds perfect, Eugenie. I can't wait to see you." Alexa was quite literally beaming. "Ok, goodnight. Have a good sleep." She hung up the phone and angled her head towards Harry with a bright smile.

"So?" He asked innocently.

"Eugenie and I are going to go shopping on Tuesday then for dinner." Alexa rested her cheek in the palm of her hand. "It was really good to hear from her and hear that she was feeling the same way as me."

Alexa crawled over to Harry and sat in front of him before cupping his cheeks with both of her hands. She gazed into his deep blue eyes as if she was searching for something, but was content quietly sitting there for a moment to get lost in the depths of them. "I know this was your doing. I know you left to call Eugenie." Alexa caressed his cheek and watched a guilty smile form on his lips. "She didn't tell me, but it was not hard to figure out Henry."

"Guilty." Harry smirked and shrugged his shoulders.

She leaned in and captured Harry's lips gently as they fell into a passionate kiss that sparked that inner flame of desire once again. But, this time Alexa was in control as she reluctantly broke her lips off of her boyfriends. "Thank you for all you do for me."

"You always give me more than I deserve. I only want you to be happy and will do anything to make that happen for you." He nudged his nose against Alexa's. A gesture she always did to him.

"Why don't we just have fun for the rest of the weekend and focus on us. I love where this is going." Alexa admitted and Harry was quick to agree with her.

"Does fun include more amazing sex?" He raised his eyebrow suggestively.

"Yeah... if you can keep up." Alexa teased Harry before feeling him grasp her hips and swing her around so she was lying flat on her back on the bed.

Alexa bit down on her bottom lips feeling Harry's lips trail down her body knowing that they were going to get very little sleep this weekend.

#prince harry #prince harry fanfic #fanfic #phff #prince harry fanfiction #chapters #chapter19 #harryandalexa #forevermyalwaysphff

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #294

“maybe it’s not too late to learn how to love and forget how to hate”

Is your bed big enough for two people? Yes. What is your favorite board game? I like Battleship. Have you ever been hospitalized for more than 2 weeks? I think one stay at the psych hospital stretched over two weeks, maybe three. I don't remember. When was the last time you heard someone scream? Irl, probably at some point visiting my sister's family and my baby niece was upset. If you include via audio, a couple days ago when watching Egoraptor's Kingdom Hearts 2 stream. He's a Loud Boy. Who was the last person to call you baby? I have no clue. Why did you last go to the airport? I was going home from Sara's. Have you ever showered with another person? Not since I was a little kid with my sister. Is there something you are keeping a secret from your parents? I mean, nothing major. There are small things I don't tell them, though. Are you able to forget people easily? FUCK to the NO. What disgusts you about bathrooms? Sharing a toilet with literally anybody. Have you ever had gum stuck in your hair? I mean maybe at some point, but I don't think so. What was the shortest amount of time you’ve known someone before you’ve dated them? If you’ve never been in a relationship before, do you watch Scrubs? I knew Jason maybe two/three weeks before he asked me out. We clicked so damn fast. Don’t you hate it when people talk about their relationships constantly? It can become a bit much. I have (had?) a friend who did this profusely to the point it was pretty impossible to have an actual conversation, and then she fell off the face of the planet. Being in love is an absolutely amazing thing, but like... that's not all you can talk about. Do you enjoy old movies? Yeah, there are some great ones. Do your neighbors annoy you in any way? Someone a few houses down has a dog that NEVER shuts the fuck up. I don't know how it doesn't lose its voice. What was the last party you were invited to? A Halloween party hosted by my friend Summer a few years ago. It was a good time. Are you honestly happy with your life right now? N O P E Do you find it fun to pray for people? I don't pray, but even if I did, "fun" seems like the wrong word. Generally when you pray for someone, there's something negative going on in their life, so like... I think "fulfilling" is maybe a better word? Has your mom ever crocheted you a blanket? My mom has deadass been working on a massive blanket since she was in her 20s (maybe even a tad younger), and she's at the tail end of her 50s. She works on it less than once in a blue moon. She started with the intention of passing it onto her kids. Do you regret letting a certain guy slip away? Debatable. It's questionable if I ever would have gotten competent help without Jason leaving, and if I didn't, what if he finally had enough when we were already married with kids (that's what I wanted at the time, anyway)? That would have broken me even worse. What show did you want to be on as a kid? Whatever the Nickelodeon one was where you got slimed lol. Do you have regrets? Of course I do. Does anyone really know you? My mom and Sara, at least. What song do you want played at your wedding? It depends on my partner and songs we consider special. Are you a fan of Taylor Swift? No. I do, however, love me some "Love Story." And you are LYYYYYYINNNNNGGGG if "Picture To Burn" doesn't make you feel like a Bad Bitch. Would you ever dye your hair unicorn colors? I would DIIIIIEEEEE to do that in pastel tints. I wish my damn hair took color well... I have literally only had ONE very effective hair dyeing experience, when my friend spent hours turning it red. It stuck for MONTHS. List 3 of your pet peeves. 1.) Turning tragedy into a competition; 2.) making mental illnesses "trendy;" and 3.) elitists of pretty much anything. Do you type fast? Very. What do you like to put on your pancakes? Typically just maple syrup, but I'll put butter on them if given it at a restaurant. Have you ever accidentally drank spoiled milk? I've taken a sip and immediately realized and spat it out. Have you ever had your heart broken? More like shattered into incalcuable pieces. When you were 3, was your natural hair color the same as it is now? No, I was dirty blonde. Have you ever received a scary message from someone online? Yes, I'm pretty sure. What does your first name rhyme with? "Infamy" is close enough, ig, if we're excluding other names. Do you have freckles on your face? No. I did as a kid, though. Who is your favorite Lisa Frank character? Probably the angel kitty (I had a coloring book, even), but they're all SO pretty. I love Lisa Frank stuff. Does your family always have your back? My mom and dad do, at least. My older sister does, meanwhile it's hard to tell with my little sister. She's not very affectionate and expressive of love to the point I question a lot if she even likes me. What type of wedding do you want to have? Gothic! Are you more of a leader or a follower? A follower, within reason. I'm definitely not a blind one. Do you know anyone with a profession in law? Quite a few, actually. Have you ever Googled yourself? Yeah, at some point. Do you have a regular vacation spot, or do you always go somewhere new? We don't really go on vacations. It's not an expense Mom can really afford. Where were you working 10 years ago? Nowhere. ... 5 years ago? Still nowhere. ... 1 year ago? Nowhere. What's the shortest amount of time you've had between relationships? Like a day. I know it sounds bad, but I left Girt already knowing I loved Sara, and I didn't really have anything to heal from. As a child, what comfort foods did your parents make for you when you were sick with a cold or flu? We'd have Saltines, chicken noodle soup (which I never really liked), and ginger ale. What's your favorite art style? Probably hyperrealistic fantasy stuff. What time period is considered to be your country's 'golden age?' I don't know, I'm not a history buff. Have you ever done LSD? I've never done any drugs. Are any of your coworkers currently out on maternity/paternity leave? N/A What is your favorite parody movie? Maybe the Paranormal Activity one. I barely remember it, though. What kind of first impression do you hope others have of you? That I'm kind and friendly and really care about their feelings. Do you have a good sense of balance? NOOOOOOOOOO. I stray like a motherfucker when I walk. Have for many years. It's weird. What is your least favorite ice cream flavor? Strawberry, ugh. Does your car have heated seats? No. What's something that has been in your local news lately? I don't watch it. What's your favorite internet meme? Oh, I have no clue, I love memes lmao. What is the strangest pizza topping you've ever eaten? Nothing, really. I'm not very adventurous with pizza. Can you name any books or movies where all the main characters die? Not off the top of my head. Do you live alone? No, I live with my mother. What’s the grossest thing you’ve encountered in/at a fast food joint? *shrug* Do you swallow chewing gum? No. Do you ever get goosebumps while listening to songs? EXTREMELY easily. Like that is so, so regular, be it from the lyrics, the singer's voice, or just the music. Are there any amusement park rides you refuse to go on? Why? Most, really. I get dizzy way, way too easily and don't want to faint. What is the best roller coaster you’ve ever been on? I'm afraid of roller coasters, so I can't answer this. Never touched one. Don’t you think black jellybeans are icky? Ugh, YES. What was the last thing you measured with a ruler? I helped Mom use the long, flexible kind to measure the couch because she was gonna move some furniture around. What’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever seen? Oh, I'm sure the mountains when driving to Tennessee. I was too young to remember it well, but I can never forget that I marveled over them. Would you rather have a Playstation or Xbox made console? I'm a Playstation gal. What if you were watching COPS and saw your significant other on there? I'm... not gonna lie, if it was Jason for doing something stupid and not, like, murderous, I'd probably cackle. Have you ever tried to write to any celebrities? No. When was the last time you blew bubbles? I ain't got a clue. Have you ever stumbled across a beehive? More like wasp nests. What food(s) make you cringe? Quite a lot, given my extreme selectiveness with textures. More than anything, probably egg yolk. Have you ever played an automated 20 Questions game and beat it? Ha, I actually had one of those! I have, but damn was that hard. Have you been to a restaurant where they cook the food in front of you? Yup, Ichiban. Pretty cool. Do you feel that presidential campaigns make people too competitive? I mean, no. People care about who is going to be the head of their country. Do you find Family Guy hilarious or offensive? Neither. Do you still write letters to people, even though there’s e-mail now? No. Have you ever had an accident involving a microwave? Ha, I'm a travesty of a cook, so yeah. I remember on one occasion I accidentally dialed in many minutes for popcorn and entirely forgot about it. Safe to say I didn't eat it. I've split hot dogs in there, and I'm certain there's more. Do you like the movie Forrest Gump? I adore that movie. One of the best films ever imo. Can you handle heat well? I honestly doubt you'll meet someone who handles it worse than me, especially physically. I have severe hyperhidrosis, so I will literally sweat like a pig in 70* weather. I absolutely cannot handle it. Do you smoke weed? What are your opinions on its legalization? No. Legalize it for at least medicinal purposes. Have you ever had a school shooting at your school? HA, I can promise you my high school must have at some point. Are you usually the first to do something, or are you more of a follower? I don't pay attention to this. What is your favorite way to eat a potato? Fries, yum. Are roses your favorite flower? No, but they're high on the list. Have you ever been to a horse race? No. I think they're abusive anyway. Do you like lobster? No. Have you ever swam in a lake? Yeah. There's one lake I swam in that was so clear you could see pretty far and just watch the fish and turtles. Have you ever convinced someone to show you their private parts? "Convinced"????? That's fucking coercion. I've seen people naked, but not by fucking pressure. What is the greatest treasure you have ever found? My older sister found a cracked amethyst geode once. Idk where it's at now, but I hope she (or we at the house, depending on where it is) finds it at some point, though. My niece has come to love smooth rocks and pebbles, and I think crystals would blow her away, never mind one that size. Do you eat beef? Regrettably. Are you good at card games? I mean, what's the game? I'm not exceptional at any I can think of. What is your favorite musical? I don't like musicals. Did you ever play the Oregon Trail game? Omg yes!!! I LOVED playing it as a kid, especially the 3rd one, I think? Do you watch It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia? No. Who is your favorite country singer? I actually do enjoy Tim McGraw pretty consistently, but I don't actually seek out his music. Do you know anyone who is Mormon? An old best friend was. Do you like grunge? Yeah. What’s your favorite kind of cheese? American. What’s the most historic thing that has happened in your lifetime? Most likely Covid. What’s your funniest story involving a car? It's not hilarious, but once we were behind someone whose license plate said "omw" lmao. What scientific discovery would change the course of humanity overnight if it was discovered? Well, a proven Covid vaccine. Do you think that humans will ever be able to live together in harmony? Nope. What’s the scariest non-horror movie? Idk. What’s the most amazing true story you’ve heard? I'm not sure. What’s the most awkward thing that happens to you on a regular basis? Having to explain my Mark tribute tattoo lmao. What was one of the most interesting concerts you’ve been to? I've only ever seen Alice Cooper, and while it was great, "interesting" seems like the wrong word. Where are you not welcome anymore? Probably Jason's house, at least not by him. Or Colleen's, probably. Idk how she feels about me by now. What’s the most recent show you’ve binge watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender w/ Sara. What’s a common experience for many people that you’ve never experienced? Paying bills. What’s the smartest thing you’ve seen an animal do? I kid you not, our first cat would look both ways twice before crossing the street across our house. (Please do not allow your cats outside.) She'd do it even more when bringing her kittens there too to hunt. Chance was truly incredible. I could really give a lot of examples of her intelligence. I also had another childhood cat (my favorite before Roman) who would respond to a certain clap pattern I'd do if Mom let me bring him inside. Wherever Charcoal was wandering, he'd come running. What’s the dumbest thing someone has argued with you about? Oh, I'm sure it was RP-related stuff as a kid. What’s the longest rabbit hole you’ve been down? I'unno. What’s the saddest scene in a movie or TV series? Possible spoiler warning for a super old movie??? Probably when the main character of Old Yeller had to put the dog down because of rabies. But I cry like a bitch easily, so maybe there's something that tears me up even more or just as badly. What odd smell do you really enjoy? None that are "odd," really. What’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild? I've seen a mink once when fishing with Dad deep in the woods. What’s the best lesson you’ve learned from a work of fiction? Oh, I don't know. I'd have to think for a while & I don't feel like it. What food do you crave most often? Probably ice cream. Who in your life has the best/worst luck? I don't know about best, but my mom absolutely has the worst luck. Which apocalyptic dystopia do you think is most likely? A meteor, maybe? If you had a HUD that showed three stats about any person you looked at, what three stats would you want it to show? I'd want to know if they were criminals or just dangerous. What’s the funniest thing you’ve seen a kid do? Oh, my niece is so funny. One of the things that gave me the biggest laugh (and was most adorable) was this time I was taking family pictures for Ash at a local lake, and Aubree went running into the gazebo, span around totally like in a princess movie, and exclaimed, "It's enormous!" She is such a darling. If people could read your mind, what would they usually find? Just how bored I am, memories of Jason bc trauma, lamenting my disappointment in myself, "why is Mark so perfect," worrying about Sara, thinking of RP character developments... What celebrity would you like to meet? Mark. 100%. I would die to just thank him (if I could get words out, oof) and hug him and try not to soak his shirt in tears lmao. Do you need money to be happy? Don't bullshit me, you wouldn't be happy homeless because you can't afford a home. So to a degree, yes. What's a good idea you've had recently? Hm. What gift would you like to receive? At this current moment, Cloak's (Mark and Jacksepticeye's clothing brand) limited edition "life after death" design for a shirt. It is so fucking pretty, and I love the nature focus. What are you most excited about right now? Honestly? Getting my laptop back. I wanna play WoW lmao. What's your favorite song from a movie? Maybe uhhhhhh was "Supermassive Black Hole" actually written for Twilight? Where would you like to volunteer? I very, very badly want to volunteer to take pictures of animals up for adoption in shelters for like their social medias and stuff. I've asked like the two local places, but no bites yet. What's the last song you listened to? Metallica's cover of "Turn The Page." What's the last YouTube video you watched? I'm watching Gab Smolders play SOMA. Fantastic game.

#survey #surveys #questions #questionnaire #lyrics: ''crazy train'' by ozzy osbourne

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ofstormsandwolves · 4 years

Text

Send My Love

Teen

Zoey x Joan

Follow-up to I’ll Stand By You and Hot for Teacher (first two installments of ‘what the heart wants (or, Zoey’s Extraordinary Gaylist)’)

Canon divergence, canonical character death (Mitch), angst, emotional hurt/ comfort.

Synopsis: Zoey and Joan have admitted their feelings, but now they have to navigate Mitch's final hours, a funeral, and two (potentially) jealous men...

Read on AO3

Zoey Clarke felt sick. One moment she and Joan had been at her apartment, laughing and chatting, and the next she was scrambling to find her shoes and dash out the door.

The day had come.

One fateful phone call from Howie, and the entirety of Zoey’s life had been tipped upside down. To Joan’s credit, she had grabbed her car keys and steered the redhead down the stairs and into her car, plopping her in the passenger seat before calmly sliding behind the wheel.

They talked very little on the drive to the Clarke house, a stark contrast to the giggling conversations they’d been having barely half hour before, and Joan only spoke to ask Zoey for directions. There was surprisingly little traffic, but the sky was already dark when they pulled up outside Mitch and Maggie’s house, but Zoey barely seemed to notice.

“Zoey?” Joan prompted gently. “We’re here.”

Zoey startled, and blinked at her parents’ house. “Oh.” She unclipped her seatbelt and slid from Joan’s car. She was still feeling somewhat nauseous, and as she stood at the end of the path leading to the front door, she found she couldn’t quite bring herself to move.

Joan’s hand slipped into hers, warm and soft and reassuring. Oh yeah, Zoey thought, I’m not alone. She looked across to her partner- and didn’t that still feel odd?- and saw Joan smiling gently at her. Taking a breath, Zoey squared her shoulders and led the other woman towards the house.

It was Howie who let them in, smiling at Zoey and quietly introducing himself to Joan with a handshake. When Maggie called for Zoey to join them in the kitchen, the redhead turned to look at her partner with a small frown.

“Go on, I’ll wait here,” Joan promised quietly.

Joan waited until Howie and Zoey had disappeared into the kitchen to pull out her phone. Dialling a number, she spared a glance into the sitting room where Mitch was, waiting for the caller to pick up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Max, it’s Joan,” she said, trying to keep her voice quiet enough that she wouldn’t disturb Zoey or her family.

“Oh, uh, hi Joan. Listen, if this is about Ava firing me-”

“Uh, no. No, it’s not. Although- I am sorry about that, Max. I can see if I can pull a few strings, hire you back-”

“I’m not sure,” Max admitted. “I mean, unless you could offer me a leadership position. I don’t think I want to go back to being just a coder. I’ve actually been looking at other jobs-”

Joan saw a dark-haired man- presumably Zoey’s brother- walk out of the kitchen then, visibly upset, and she remembered just why she’d called Max. “Um, Max, I was actually calling about Zoey. Well, uh, Zoey’s dad. He’s not doing well, and I think Zoey would want you to know. I know you and she are close.”

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone then, and for a moment Joan thought Max had hung up.

“Oh god,” Max muttered after a long while. “Uh, thanks for letting me know, Joan. I have to go.”

And then Max hung up. Pursing her lips, Joan slipped her phone back into her pocket, turning to see Zoey walking towards her.

“How are you?” she asked quietly.

Zoey shrugged, her eyes a little damp. “David and Emily are gonna go talk with Dad. I told them I could wait.” She spared a glance towards the sitting room, watching as her brother and sister-in-law approached Mitch. Then she looked back to Joan, eyes bright with unshed tears. “I don’t know if I can bear it, Joan. I mean, what am I meant to say to him?”

Joan let out a sigh then. “I know it’s difficult. And... I get why you maybe don’t want to talk to him. It’s a huge thing. Emotional. But Zoey, remember what I told you about when my mom died?”

“You were at work,” Zoey recalled. Joan had mentioned her mom before, when Zoey had told her about Mitch’s illness, but only a few days ago she had also revealed that she hadn’t been there when her mom had passed because she was busy at work.

“I never got to say goodbye,” Joan reminded her softly. “For weeks afterwards, all I could think was ‘what if I’d left work just half hour earlier?’, ‘what if I’d asked for a day off?’, ‘what if I’d at least called to see how she was?’. I don’t want you to have regrets like that, Zoey. I know it’s terrifying, and I know it’s a huge pressure, but not saying goodbye to your dad is much, much worse in the long run.”

Zoey sniffled at that, and Joan pulled her in for a hug. They stayed like that for several long moments, before Maggie appeared in the doorway. Seeing the other woman, Joan reluctantly pulled back from Zoey.

“Joan,” Maggie greeted, giving the woman a small smile. Zoey flushed, and Joan shifted uncomfortably, and Maggie seemed faintly amused by it. “Good to see you again. I wish it was under better circumstances.”

“Me too,” Joan said. “It’s lovely to see you again, Mrs Clarke.”

Maggie rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. It’s Maggie.” She gestured to the kitchen. “Did you want a drink?”

“Oh, I can do that, Mom,” Zoey offered quickly. “Why don’t you-”

“What?” Maggie interrupted quietly. “Sit down? Relax? Watch TV? Zoey, honey, I need to keep busy. This is hard enough as it is. I just... I need to do something.”

Biting her lip, Zoey nodded slowly. “Ok. Coffee would be good, if you’re making it.”

The moment her mom was gone, the redhead turned back to Joan.

“Can I have another hug?” she asked meekly.

Joan gave a sad smile, and Zoey quickly fell into her embrace.

It was nearly half hour later when there was a knock at the door.

“I’ll get it,” Joan offered quickly as David, Emily, Zoey, and Maggie all looked up in alarm.

She moved quickly towards the door, opening it quietly before stopping dead.

“Uh, Joan. I didn’t realise you were here.”

Max was frowning at her from the doorstep, expression somewhere between confused and surprised.

“Max,” Joan greeted uncomfortably. “Uh, come in.”

The pair of them continued to give each other strange looks as Max stepped into the foyer. He skirted around his boss carefully before moving further into the house.

“Max?”

Zoey had appeared in the kitchen doorway, a look of surprise on her face. Her voice pulled the attention to her, and Max gave her a sympathetic look.

“Hey, Zoey. Uh, Joan called, she told me about your dad.”

He moved to give her a hug then, and Zoey breathed in his familiar scent. Joan shifted a little uncomfortably, not really knowing what to do. After a few moments, Zoey pulled away from Max and gave him a small smile.

“Did you want to see Dad?” she asked quietly. “I’m sure he’d like to see you.”

Max nodded at that, mustering up a small smile. “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.” He glanced to Joan briefly then, before looking back to his friend. “I mean, as long as I’m not interrupting anything.”

Zoey shrugged. “David and Emily have already said their goodbyes really, and I’m still trying to work up the courage. But Dad would want to see you.”

Nodding again, Max moved towards the sitting room, leaving Joan and Zoey behind. Only a few moments later, David and Emily exited the room and headed for the stairs.

“We’re going to try and get some rest,” David explained quietly to his sister. “We won’t be long, though. Just... give me a shout if anything happens?”

“Will do,” Zoey said softly.

Once David and Emily had disappeared upstairs, Zoey held her hand out to Joan and the other woman took it wordlessly. Leading her through to the kitchen, the young woman instinctively began making drinks again.

“Thanks for calling Max,” she said as she waited for the water to boil. She wouldn’t look at Joan, but could feel the woman’s concerned eyes on her. “I’m not sure I would have been able to.”

“No problem. I figured you’d probably want him to know. Wasn’t exactly expecting him to rush over, though.” There was a pause then. “He really loves you, doesn’t he?”

At the tone of Joan’s voice, Zoey couldn’t help but look round. The older woman looked resigned, and perhaps a little anxious. They’d never really discussed Zoey’s almost relationships with Simon or Max. Joan knew that Zoey had sung to them the same day she’d sung to her, but there had never been a full conversation.

“I chose you, Joan,” Zoey reminded her gently. “I want to date you, not Max. And yes, Max has feelings for me, and for a while I thought I might possibly feel the same way about him, but...” She trailed off and shook her head. “There’s only one person who has my heart, and she’s standing in this room with me.”

Joan flushed at that, and tried to cover by rolling her eyes. “Flatterer.” She paused. “I know we said we had to keep our relationship quiet, at least at the office, but you can tell your family. And Max.”

Zoey considered that. “Do you want me to? Tell Max, I mean?”

The brunette shrugged and looked away. “I don’t know. It’s up to you. But Zoey, it looks to me like Max still thinks he has a shot with you, and I’m worried that not telling him about us is going to make things worse in the long run.”

“I’ll speak to Max, tell him we’re dating now.” Zoey turned back to finish making the drinks.

Joan pursed her lips, surveying Zoey for a few moments before moving closer. “Zoey, it doesn’t have to be tonight, you know. You have enough going on right now, and it can wait.”

“Not if you’re uncomfortable,” Zoey countered as she stirred the coffee. “I’m not letting my girlfriend feel like that.” She flashed Joan a small smile.

“Ugh, first of all, I’m a grown woman. I can deal with Max having feelings for you for a few more days,” Joan said. “And secondly, we agreed; we’re partners, not girlfriends. I’m too old to be a girlfriend.” She pulled a face.

Zoey smirked then, and pushed a mug of coffee towards Joan. “I beg to disagree,” she said. “But whatever you want, partner.”

Max didn’t stay long.

“I should really get going,” he told Zoey quietly as the pair of them stood in the foyer. “But you’ll call if you need anything?”

Zoey hesitated at that. She couldn’t help but think back to the conversation with Joan in the kitchen. As much as the older woman insisted it could wait, she was starting to realise that Max was going to have to know sooner rather than later.

“Uh, sure,” she managed with a tight smile. “I mean, I think we’re all good here, but if I need anything, you’re my first call.”

Max had a slightly odd look on his face at that, and he nodded slowly. “Alright then. I’ll just leave you guys- and, uh, Joan I guess- to it.”

That made Zoey frown for a brief second, but Max was already moving towards to the door. They said their goodbyes quietly, and then she was left staring out into the street as he walked away.

“Zoey? Everything alright?”

Maggie approached her daughter uncertainly, watching as Zoey closed the door and turned back to her with a puzzled expression.

“Just Max,” she said quietly. “He’s acting a little... Uh, off, I guess.”

Maggie sighed, and moved closer to her daughter. “Well, honey, is it possible he just didn’t know how to act around you? Things are different now.”

Zoey frowned. “I suppose so. But he’s known about Dad being ill for ages...”

Giving her daughter a look, Maggie wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I didn’t mean your dad, honey,” she murmured in her ear as she walked them towards the sitting room.

They stopped just outside the doorway, and Zoey’s eyes went wide as she saw Joan sat with Mitch, talking quietly to him.

“-the best coder we have,” Joan was saying, a proud smile on her face. “I mean, I know we’re both biased, but I really believe that. Zoey’s an extraordinary woman, and I hope you’re proud of her. I... I know I am.”

Wide-eyed, Zoey swallowed thickly as she realised Joan was talking with Mitch about her. Maggie rubbed at her daughter’s shoulders.

“For what it’s worth,” Maggie said quietly, “all your father and I have ever wanted is for you to be happy.”

Blinking away tears, Zoey looked to her mom. “I am, Mom. I am happy.”

Maggie smiled back. “Good.”

Zoey’s talk with Howie about death had helped, at least a little bit. Honestly, Zoey was glad to have Joan there with her. If she’d had to go through it alone she didn’t know what she would have done. The worst part, of course, was the waiting. She was waiting for her dad to die. The thought made her feel sick.

It didn’t make it any easier, though, when her mom came to tell her she needed to speak to her dad sooner rather than later. David and Howie had moved him into his bed, made him more comfortable, and part of Zoey regretted waiting so long. If she’d spoken to him just a little earlier, she could have spoken to him in the sitting room. Now, he was mostly unconscious, drugged up and struggling to breathe. Zoey sat beside him, biting her lip as she considered what to say.

“I’m going to try to go a different way with this,” she admitted slowly. “I’m doing well at work, the guy I had a crush on likes me back, although I’ve finally figured out my love life and it doesn’t involve him. Or Max. Or, well, any guy. But I think you’ve figured that out, huh? I heard a bit of what Joan said to you earlier. I... I really love her, Dad. We’re keeping the relationship quiet for now, though. We’re still trying to work out the logistics, particularly at work, but I think this might be it.” Zoey broke off, smiling to herself for a moment, before continuing. “And those heart songs I keep hearing? I’m starting to think that they’re not all bad. In fact, I’m sort of warming to them. So... I’m doing alright. Nothing’s perfect, and I’m figuring things out as I go, but I thought you’d want to hear that. That your little girl’s doing well.”

As Zoey finished speaking, she felt a calm wash over her. She’d been dreading this moment for weeks- months, even. And while it had been horrible, there was also something peaceful inside of her. She’d spoken to her dad, she hadn’t broken down, she’d been able to finally give him good news about her job, her love life, her powers.

But then Mitch started struggling to breathe, and Howie hurried into the room to drug him up with more morphine. Maggie and David hovered nearby in concern, and Joan paused in the doorway, unsure what to do. Without thinking, Zoey peeled herself away from the bed to move instead into Joan’s embrace. David spared her a glance, but did nothing more than give his younger sister a tight, sympathetic smile before returning his attention to Mitch.

There really wasn’t anything any of them could do, though, beyond wait for the inevitable. David left the room briefly to check on Emily, but other than that the family remained gathered around Mitch. When Zoey returned to her father’s bedside she tugged Joan with her, and the older woman stood behind the redhead’s chair with a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

That was how Joan realised something odd was happening. Zoey stiffened beneath her touch, before looking to the sitting room and standing. Thinking that she perhaps needed space, Joan let her go. The whole thing lasted only a few seconds, and Zoey only got as far as the door before pausing.

That was when it happened. As Maggie let out a sob, Zoey turned back to her family with a smile on her face. It quickly faded, however, and she turned to look over her shoulder again with a concerned look. Blinking, she stared at her dad for a moment before looking to Joan. Without anyone even uttering a word, Joan quickly moved towards Zoey, holding her arms out. The younger woman fell into the embrace with a sob.

Nobody talked for a very long time.

There was a good turnout for Mitch’s funeral, which surprised nobody. He was a well-loved man, who got on with pretty much everybody he met. Of course lots of people wanted to pay their respects.

It was all a bit overwhelming, though, and Zoey, David, and Emily were all for staying in the car rather than going inside the house. Maggie urged them inside, though, and they were forced to make awkward small-talk with all the guests.

Or, at least, David and Emily were. Zoey was off in her own little world for almost the entirety of the afternoon and into the evening. Joan followed her around the house, making pleasant small-talk with friends of the Clarke family while keeping a close eye on her partner. She knew she was probably raising suspicions, particularly when it came to Max, but she was too concerned about Zoey to care. Although, she did file away Simon’s surprising reaction for future conversation. While the man hadn’t been hostile, he’d been giving Joan sideways glances the whole time, a shadow over his eyes that hinted at jealousy or annoyance.

Oh joy. Not only did Max have feelings for Zoey, but it looked like Simon did too. How were they going to keep Simon off their scent if they wanted to keep their relationship quiet at work?

As she was introduced to yet another old family friend, Joan shook the thought from her head. She was there for Zoey, to remind her to take a break, to eat, to sit down, to step out for some air. They had the rest of their lives to deal with Simon and Max, and anyone else. Right now, she had to get her partner through the rest of the day.

It was a good couple of hours before people finally started filtering out the door. With everyone gone or halfway out the door, Joan was just about to get going when she was stopped by David.

“Are you leaving?”

Joan blinked at him in surprise, looking towards the foyer where Zoey and Mo were saying their goodbyes, before looking back to him. “Uh, yeah. I figured, this was family time...”

David considered that for a moment, before giving the woman a small smile. “I know that you’re dating my sister. I’m pretty certain that makes you family.”

Not really knowing how to respond, Joan stared at him. “So, uh, Zoey told you?”

At that, David laughed a little. “No, no. But she’s my little sister, you know? Besides, I saw the way you two were, the night Dad... Well, let’s just say I could tell.”

Joan folded her arms, a little uncomfortable. “Right. So you’re... Alright with it? I mean, I know Zoey will care, so...”

David shrugged. “We’ve been through hell since Dad was diagnosed. As far as I’m concerned, as long as you make her happy I have no problem with it.” He nodded towards the sitting room, where Emily was already waiting. “So. Are you going to join us?”

Joan glanced towards the foyer again, just in time to see Mo slipping out the door. “If Zoey wants me to, yes.”

David smiled. “Good. Welcome to the family, Joan.”

Joan eventually left the Clarke residence at just before half ten that night, with Zoey, David, and Emily all staying the night. Unsurprisingly, over the next few days she and Zoey didn’t see each other in person, tied up as they both were. But they did manage some conversation over the phone, which was better than nothing. While Zoey was spending time with her family in the wake of Mitch’s death, Joan was frantically trying to figure out her new role as acting CEO of SPRQ Point while Danny Michael Davis was in prison (still nobody was entirely clear on the charges).

In fact, Joan had resigned herself to not seeing her partner in person for at least a week, and so it was quite a surprise when Zoey showed up on her doorstep five days after the funeral.

“I needed to see you,” Zoey said loudly, pushing her way into Joan’s house before the other woman had chance to fully process what was happening.

Joan shut the door against the orange glow of the evening sun, and turned to her partner with a frown. “Zoey? Is everything alright-”

Joan had barely finished speaking before Zoey’s lips were pressed against hers. The kiss was determined, forceful, and spoke of Zoey’s struggling emotions. Joan allowed herself to lean into the kiss for a moment or two before forcing herself to pull away.

“Zoey, honey, talk to me. Not that it’s not great to see you, but this is a bit sudden...”

Zoey’s shoulders slumped then, and she folded her arms across her chest, avoiding Joan’s gaze. “I just... I missed you. We’ve not seen each other since Dad’s funeral, and even though we’ve talked on the phone, it’s not the same.” She sighed. “I should have called. You’re probably busy. I’m sorry.”

She moved towards the door then, but Joan quickly intercepted.

“It’s fine, honey,” Joan said, taking her arm and instead steering her towards the sitting room. “I could do with a break, anyway. Geez, how Danny Michael Davis was always so chilled out, I’ll never know.”

She gently pushed Zoey down onto the large, plush designer sofa, before sitting down next to her. immediately, the younger woman moved closer, looking for contact.

“I’m sorry I’ve not had much time for you recently,” Zoey said quietly. “And I’m sorry for showing up unannounced.”

“Zoey, you’ve just lost your dad. You’re allowed to be busy, and you’re allowed to be a little out of sorts. Also, you’re allowed here anytime you want.”

Zoey shifted to look at Joan then, a cautiously hopeful look on her face. “Really?”

Joan smiled softly. “Really. Hey, I didn’t demand the house in the divorce just to piss Charlie off.” She considered that for a moment, before shrugging and staring across the room. “Well, that was a big part of it. But I also demanded the house because it’s mine. It’s my home. Charlie was nearly always out, or travelling, or at a hotel after a party. He never really seemed to belong here. But I did. I do, and I want you to belong here too.”

Zoey was unnervingly quiet then, and Joan looked down at her partner with a worried frown. The redhead was staring at her with a look of bewilderment.

“Oh, god,” Joan said, eyes going wide. “Why did I bring my ex-husband up? I’m sorry, Zoey, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable-”

“No, no, it’s not that...” Zoey said quickly, though she didn’t exactly look any more relaxed. “I just... Joan, are you suggesting I move in with you?”

The older woman blinked at that. “Uh... Do you want to?”

“Do you want me to?”

Joan frowned. “So... You do want to?”

“I didn’t say that,” Zoey countered, growing more confused. “Wait... Do you want me to want to?”

“I... Zoey, I don’t even understand the conversation we’re having right now,” Joan admitted, frown deepening as she tried to untangle everything in her head. “I’ve spent most of today figuring out the release schedule for SPRQ Point’s latest products, and I think Danny Michael Davis wrote the whole thing while stoned because none of it makes sense... He’s scheduled floor three’s video chat app for release in Julgust. What does that even mean? Julgust?”

“I- Well, it sounds like he merged July and August,” Zoey pointed out helpfully. “So... Maybe he was hedging his bets?”

“Zoey, it’s Danny Michael Davis we’re talking about!”

“Oh. Yeah. Then he was probably stoned when he wrote the schedule.”

Joan rolled her eyes. “Exactly my point.” Then, she shook her head. “No! No, that’s not my point! My point is that, after dealing with that all day, I’m tired enough that I cannot begin to figure out the conversation we seem to be having. So don’t take this the wrong way, Zoey, but I wasn’t asking you to move in. At least, not yet. We’ve only had one date, the night we called the bake-off off. I haven’t been divorced that long, only a few months. You’re still grieving after losing your dad. I don’t think rushing into this relationship is what either of us need. But I meant what I said; I want you to be comfortable here. You are welcome here any time.”

Zoey nodded slowly, a warm smile spreading across her face as Joan spoke. “That... That sounds good.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I have to admit, I kind of got a little spooked,” Zoey admitted, voice quiet but warm. “I don’t know if I’m ready to move in with you, not on any sort of permanent basis. But I would like to spend more time with you, whether that’s here, or my place, or going out on dates...”

Joan smiled. “That does sound good.”

After a week and a half off of work in the wake of Mitch’s death, Zoey Clarke surprised everyone by showing back up at SPRQ Point at nine on the dot. And nobody was more baffled than her partner.

Partway through fending off kind words and awkward condolences from her team, including Leif and Tobin, the redhead became aware that she was being watched. Standing in the doorway to her office, arms folded and a neutral expression on her face, was Joan.

“Zoey? Can I speak to you a moment?”

Pursing her lips, Zoey moved towards the office, barely hearing Tobin’s muttered comment to Leif about how she was already in trouble and she hadn’t even been in the office five minutes. Once inside Joan’s office, Zoey reluctantly lowered herself into the chair. Joan sat on the edge of her desk, arms still folded and giving the younger woman an exasperated look.

“Why are you here, Zoey?”

“I work here?” Zoey offered, trying to lighten the situation.

The arched eyebrow from Joan told her that it wasn’t going to work.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming in today?” Joan tried again. “We spoke last night! You never mentioned coming in!”

“I just... Felt like it,” Zoey shrugged. “I mean, Mom’s been getting out the house a little to meet with friends, Emily’s had the baby so that’s keeping my brother busy... I wanted to just come in, and work on some code, and not be treated like a delicate object for a while.”

Pursing her lips, the brunette nodded slowly then. It seemed like she was choosing her next words carefully. “Am I... Am I doing something wrong? Is there something you want me to, to stop doing? Or that I should be doing but I’m not?”

Zoey blinked. “What? No, Joan! Why would you think that?”

“Well, I don’t know,” Joan looked away, clearly uncomfortable and a little embarrassed. It reminded Zoey of how she’d reacted when Charlie had walked out of their SPRQ Watch meeting, and it made her uneasy that she’d upset Joan just like Charlie had. “You’re saying you don’t want to be treated like a delicate object, you’re coming back into work without letting me know... It sounds like this is a me-and-you issue.”

“It’s not, I promise,” the redhead responded gently. She sighed. “I didn’t mean to upset you, Joan, and I really didn’t plan to come back in today, or I’d have spoken to you. I just woke up this morning and realised that I didn’t want to sit around feeling sorry for myself anymore. I know that sounds awful, but it’s the truth. Dad would hate it if he knew what was going on, if he knew I still had my life on hold for him. I just needed to come in, needed to do some work and get my mind off it all. And when I’m here, I’m not Zoey-whose-dad-just-died; I’m Zoey-the-team-leader. I mean, sure, Tobin and Leif and everyone are aware of what I’ve been going through, and they’re being a bit nicer than usual, but they aren’t going to constantly ask me how I’m feeling. When I’m at Mom’s house, and people come round, all they want to know is how I’m holding up. When I’m here, or with you, it’s different.”

It was Joan’s turn to sigh then, her expression softening to one of concern. “Honey, you should have told me. I understand, I get that you need to be doing something. But I don’t like being caught off-guard, you know that. I’m not saying you have to ask my permission, not at all, but if you’d just let me know...” She trailed off, took a breath. “I worried. When I saw you come in, I worried.”

Zoey frowned. “You... Worried?”

Nodding, Joan hesitantly met her eyes again. “Yeah. I mean, I told you that you could take two full weeks off, and you seemed so keen, and so when you showed up today I worried that you were doing something you’d regret. You know, that you were coming back early to prove a point or something, or trying to force yourself to do something you weren’t ready for.” She cleared her throat, glanced out the glass of her office to see Tobin and Leif watching in concern. “I guess I’m just feeling a little overprotective of you right now.” She gave her partner a small smile. “And I’m trying hard not to smother you, but... I don’t like seeing you hurting, Zoey.”

“Well, for what it’s worth, I don’t like seeing you hurting either,” Zoey countered with a soft smile. “And I’m sorry I made you worry.” She too glanced over at Leif and Tobin then, before looking back to her partner. “I should get back to work before Leif and Tobin start coming up with conspiracy theories about what we’re talking about.”

With one final smile between the two women, Zoey left the room.

By lunchtime, however, Zoey was finding the office a little stifling.

“Hey,” she greeted Joan as she reached the cereal bar.

Joan was glaring at the options available, clearly taken with none of them. “These choices are awful. Who chose to go back to a cereal bar? Was it Glenn?”

Before she could shout for poor Glenn, who was probably hiding again, Zoey cleared her throat pointedly.

“Uh, actually, I wanted to speak to you about that. I- Well, if you’re not busy, I was wondering if you wanted to go out for lunch? I just... Need to get out of the office for a bit.”

Concern came over Joan’s face, and she nodded quickly. “Yeah. Yeah, of course. Let me grab my purse.”

They headed for the elevators, with a detour through Joan’s office to grab her purse, and soon they were out of the office and walking down the street.

“Where were you thinking?” Joan asked, slipping her hand into Zoey’s. “There’s a sushi place nearby, if you fancy that. Or there’s a good Italian place-”

“I was thinking somewhere a little different,” Zoey interrupted, giving her partner a nervous smile. “I’m more in the mood for... Well, for something sweet.”

Joan gave a small smile at that, and simply nodded for Zoey to lead the way. They made small talk as they walked, talking about anything that came to mind. Joan complained yet again about Danny Michael Davis’s awful management of SPRQ Point, while Zoey shared stories of her brother and Emily embarking on parenthood.

“I don’t think it will be long before Mom offers to babysit,” Zoey laughed. “She’s already been telling David and Emily about how nice it will be for them to be able to go out for a meal just the two of them.”

“Have you had a chance to meet the baby yet?” Joan asked.

At that, Zoey grinned widely, and promptly dove into her purse to retrieve her phone. “I have pictures!”

Moments later, Joan found herself blinking at an entire album on Zoey’s phone dedicated to her newborn nephew. “He’s cute,” she said, accepting the phone to thumb through the photos. “Tiny.”

“I think my sister-in-law would disagree with that,” Zoey said with a grin.

Joan smirked back. “I’m sure she would.” She came across a photo of Zoey holding the baby then, and promptly fell silent. The photo had clearly been snapped without Zoey knowing, as she stared down at the tiny baby in her arms with such love that it made Joan’s heart clench. She quickly covered the sudden flood of fear she felt with a smile and handed the phone back to its owner. “What did they call him again?”

“Sam,” Zoey said as she pocketed the phone. “Well, Samuel Mitch Clarke.”

She was still beaming from ear to ear, and it was clear that she doted on her nephew. Feeling another wave of unease, Joan busied herself with checking her own phone for emails.

“This is cheesecake,” Joan said, staring at the food in front of her.

“This is cheesequake,” Zoey corrected as she slid into a seat opposite. “It’s good. Try it.”

Still a little baffled that Zoey had wanted cheesecake over sushi or Italian, Joan picked up her spoon and scooped a small amount of the food into her mouth. Zoey watched her with a knowing smile.

“This is good,” Joan said after a few moments. “How did you find out about this place?”

“Simon brought me here,” Zoey admitted. “And then I brought Max here, after he got fired. It’s good comfort food.”

At the mention of the two men in Zoey’s life, Joan felt her smile stiffen a little. First the photo of Zoey and Sam, and now the mention of Max and Simon. Joan was a confident woman while at work, but Charlie’s treatment of her over the years had left her uncertain when it came to personal connections. She couldn’t help but feel like Zoey was already slipping through her fingers.

“Joan?”

Shaking herself, the brunette forced another smile, hoping it looked more natural than it felt.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yeah,” she waved off Zoey’s concern. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

Zoey frowned. “Uh, because it doesn’t look alright?”

Joan responded by shrugging. “I’m fine.” She took another bite of food. “Good cheesequake.”

But Zoey pursed her lips, set down her spoon, and leaned forward to take Joan’s hand in hers. “Something’s bothering you. I can tell.”

Brow furrowing, Joan glanced around before leaning forward. “I didn’t... You know? I mean, this isn’t a power thing, is it?”

“What? No, you didn’t sing. Joan, I can just tell. Something’s bothering you. Talk to me.”

Zoey’s thumb was stroking the delicate skin of Joan’s wrist then; a soothing motion that did help to calm the older woman’s racing thoughts even if it didn’t stop them entirely.

“I’m being stupid,” Joan said with a sigh.

“I doubt that,” Zoey said. “You don’t do stupid.”

The brunette’s lips quirked at that, but then she looked away for a moment. “Zoey...” She looked back to her partner, uncertain. “Why are you with me?”

Zoey frowned. “Because I love you.” She thought for a moment. “Is this because I mentioned Max? I’ve already told you, you don’t have to worry about him. I chose you, remember?”

“I remember,” Joan agreed quietly. “But Zoey, you could have Max, or Simon, or anyone else your age. Why did you pick me? That photo of you and your nephew... You do realise that being with me means no kids, right? I mean, I’m not cut out to be a mom! I scare everybody in the office! And even if I didn’t, I’m too old for all that. I’m more than twenty years older than you; in fact I’m closer to your mom’s age than yours!”

Zoey’s frown deepened. “This is really bothering you.” She took in Joan’s pursed lips, her tight posture, her damp eyes. Her heart broke. “Joan, how many times do I have to tell you that I love you? I don’t want Max, or Simon, or anyone else. And as much as I love Sam, I’m not even sure I want kids. And I certainly don’t care how old you are.”

“You might change your mind,” Joan countered, sitting back in her chair and pulling her arm from Zoey’s grip.

The redhead shrugged. “Or I might not. Joan, I never gave any serious thought to ever being with Max, and I never really considered anything serious with Simon either. The only one I want that sort of relationship with is you. And I know that I can’t make you believe this, but I don’t want anybody except you.”

Finally, Joan’s lips quirked into a small smile and some of the tension fell from her shoulders. The pair of them stayed silent for a few moments, no words necessary as they stared into each other’s eyes. But then, Zoey got this strange feeling she was being watched, and reluctantly tore her eyes from Joan. Looking round, her eyes went wide as she saw someone familiar watching them.

With a frown, Joan turned to look too, swallowing when she saw Simon staring back at them with a surprised on his face. As the man approached, Zoey and Joan shared a bewildered look.

“What do we do?” Joan whispered, wide-eyed.

Zoey only just managed a shrug before Simon reached the table.

“Ladies,” he greeted, smiling at the pair of them although it looked strained. “Joan, I see Zoey’s introduced you to cheesequakes.”

“She is,” Joan responded with a tight smile. “They’re good.”

“That they are,” Simon agreed, looking between the two women. “Zoey! I heard you were back at work today. I thought you weren’t back until next Monday?”

“Oh, yeah,” Zoey said uncomfortably. “I, uh, I came back a little early. Wanted to do something, you know. Keep myself busy.”

Simon nodded in understanding, and was about to say something when he was interrupted.

“Uh, hi guys.”

Max was approaching them with a confused look on his face, taking in Zoey and Joan sharing a table, and the awkward expression on Simon’s face.

“Hi, Simon, Joan,” Max greeted with a forced smile. He gave a small nod to his former boss and the man next to him before turning his attention to the younger woman. “Zo, I was about to call you. I didn’t realise you were meeting Joan for lunch. I got cheesequakes.” He held up the two cheesequakes he’d already purchased.

“Oh, well, great minds think alike,” Zoey said, eyes flashing to the two cheesequakes Simon was also holding. “But I went back into work this morning, so I asked Joan to join me for something to eat.” She shifted a little uncomfortably.

Opposite her, Joan was tight-lipped and pale-faced. There was a tense silence for several long moments before, finally, Simon spoke up.

“So, uh, I should get back to work. Lots of stuff to do at the office.”

“Uh, yeah, I should go too,” Max said suddenly, giving the two women a tight smile. “That new job isn’t going to find itself.”

As the two men walked away, Joan’s shoulders sagged.

“Oh, god,” she muttered, giving Zoey a look.

“It’s fine,” Zoey responded quietly as she watched the men leave, “I doubt Simon will say anything, and Max doesn’t even work at SPRQ Point anymore.”

“That doesn’t make it any less awkward,” Joan pointed out. “Both Simon and Max clearly like you, Zoey, and now they’ve seen us together...”

But Zoey couldn’t hear the rest of what Joan was saying, as music started up in her head. She saw both Simon and Max stop walking, turning round to approach her again.

“Oh boy,” she muttered.

It was just Simon who started singing as he approached her, though, and the words surprised Zoey.

“This was all you, none of it me,

You put your hands on, on my body and told me,

Mmmm,

You told me you were ready

For the big one, for the big jump

I’d be your last love everlasting you and me

Mmmm,

That was what you told me...”

Simon hit the chorus just as he reached Joan and Zoey’s table, Max sliding in neatly beside him and joining in with the lyrics.

“I’m giving you up

I’ve forgiven it all

You set me free.”

The two men started dancing then, Simon moving clockwise round the table while Max went counter-clockwise. Opposite her, Joan was frowning at her.

“Zoey? Zoey, what’s happening?”

“Send my love to your new lover

Treat her better...”

Blinking, Zoey forced herself to look at her partner. “Uh, Max and Simon are singing.”

“We’ve gotta let go of all of our ghosts

We both know we ain’t kids no more...”

Joan’s eyebrows shot up. “Singing? Singing what? Are they going to tell HR about us?”

“I... I don’t think so,” Zoey admitted, watching as the men continued to dance.

“Send my love to your new lover

Treat her better...”

“Well, what are they singing?”

Zoey shrugged. “I don’t know the song. It’s something about... I think it’s called ‘Send my love’?”

At that, Joan’s eyebrow arched. “Oh.”

“We’ve gotta let go of all of our ghosts

We both know we ain’t kids no more...”

Simon’s voice faded out then as Max took over for the next verse.

“I was too strong, you were trembling

You couldn’t handle the hot heat rising

Mmmm,

Baby, I’m still rising

I was running, you were walking

You couldn’t keep up, you were falling down

Mmmm,

There’s only one way down.”

Zoey blinked as she realised the significance of what the two men were singing. Joan gave her a small smile.

“I’m giving you up

I’ve forgiven it all

You set me free, oh...”

Simon came back in for the chorus as the two men came to a stop side by side where they’d started.

“Send my love to your new lover

Treat her better

We’ve gotta let go of all of our ghosts

We both know we ain’t kids no more...”

As they continued to sing, Simon and Max started to back away, moving towards the exit. Their voices faded as they grew further away.

“Send my love to your new lover

Treat her better

We’ve gotta let go of all of our ghosts

We both know we ain’t kids no more...”

And then, it was over. Blinking, Zoey looked to Joan.

“This is a good thing, right?” Joan asked uncertainly, studying Zoey’s face for clues as to how she was feeling.

A smile spread across the younger woman’s face. “Yes. It is.”

And then, just because she could, she stood up, pulled Joan forward, and kissed her across the table.

#zep fic #zoey x joan #zoeys extraordinary playlist #zoey clarke #joan bennett #my fic

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