#The Shop

[worthlessprotoplasam]

Uh oh something is brewing down here....

[hustlemeanokay]

Grad Sale @ The Punkary

Discount: 23% off

Duration: Jun 1, 2023 12:00 AM—Jun 16, 2023 12:00 AM

Terms and conditions: Celebrating my daughter's high school graduation, here's to the class of 2023! Can you freaking believe it?! 23% off from June 1st - June 15th. Following the shop will be closed from June 16th until June 25th. Orders received by June 15th will ship on June 16th. Any orders received after 6/15 will not be shipped until we return from the break.

Yup - so 23% off the awesome stuff at the Punkary!

[piratefishmama]

To everyone who ordered from the shop!

The manufacturer has let me know they've dispatched the charms! When they arrive, I'll get them sent out to you ASAP!!

[hahaheart1]

Welcome to the Anything & Everything store, ask for whatever you'd like! 

 The price is a mystery till you order

No fear, it's all *very* affordable! 

 Feel free to spend as many dabloons as you want! Order in the replies, asks, reblogs, dms or not at all! It is your choice after all!

Link to my dabloon sona!

[reignofkings]

Jay Smooth on HBO's The Shop

[mightydragoon]

we are missing an entire ass compass there

@staff​

[freshthoughts2020]

[indeedgoodman]

[reverie-quotes]

I'd lived with misunderstanding for so long, I'd stopped even viewing it as bad. It was just there, embedded in everything I loved.

— Anthony Veasna So, "The Shop," Afterparties

[suddenlysomewherethatsgreen]

[hustlemeanokay]

New Destiny acrylic heart keychains in the shop - there are more, these are just a few of them.

[piratefishmama]

Shop orders update!

All the orders from the shop are now shipped and i've sent you your individual tracking numbers via the email you provided when you ordered it!!

Fingers crossed you get them soon!!

Postman was in the post office when i sent them off so they've probably been grabbed on the afternoon pick up, they're officially on their way!

[io-lu-art]

A tale of Ba Sing Se.

[foldingfittedsheets]

Every sales job I’ve worked has that one item. The white whale. The biggest ticket you can sell. The sale you brag about when you’re chatting with other industry people.

When I sold mattresses it was a split king adjustable base. That’s two twin extra long mattresses next to each other to make a king, but each side can move independently. They’re insanely expensive and honestly kind’ve impractical but it was the biggest ticket thing to sell.

When I sold sex toys though our white whale was the 20lb ass. It was a female pelvis, a cut out from the waist to the tops of the thighs. It was hyper realistic material and cost about $500. I definitely had bigger tickets but not in one item typically.

In my time at the sex shop, I sold three. Each time was completely different in terms of how the guy acted about buying it. The first man was a little embarrassed and shy about it. I was professional and supportive as I rang it up. Once I handed him the receipt he looked at the box. Then he looked at me.

If you’ve ever wondered how big a box has to be to fit a 20lb ass let me just tell you: it’s pretty damn big. It’s an uncomfortably large armful of box and every side has a picture of the sex toy inside on it. It’s not subtle.

“Could I get a bag….?”

There was no bag that existed that could possibly contain all that ass. “Hang on,” I told him.

I got scissors and tape and covered the box in cut up black bags. Looking relieved he picked up his purchase and left.

The next man to buy one carried it proudly to the counter; self assured and not embarrassed in the least. When I said I didn’t have a bag, but I could wrap it for him he gave a hearty shrug and hefted it into his arms, marching out the door with the butt on full display.

The last man to get one was just kind’ve an odd guy. Not creepy, but eccentric. We got along great, and as I rang him up I said, “Well one guy wanted his taped over, and one guy carried it out. What would you prefer?”

“There’s no bags?”

“No store bags. I think our jumbo trash bags in the back might fit it….?” It seemed rude to suggest putting a $500 item into a trash bag, but he wasn’t bothered.

He considered this then said, “Bring me the trash bag.”

When I delivered it to him he still managed to surprise me. Instead of shoving the huge box into it he opened the box. He took out his new $500 sex toy, and all the little things it came with, tipping them unceremoniously into the trash bag.

“There! Now I don’t have to deal with the box later!”

I was slightly stunned but agreed that I could easily deal with the trash. Then in a move I still think about with delight he flung the trash bag over his shoulder like a Santa with a sack full of ass and sauntered out the door.

If this or my other escapades made you laugh you could pop a tip into my Ko-fi! For more like this check my tag "ffs foibles".

[zytes]

this manatee looks like it’s in a skyrim loading screen