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luvknow · 4 months
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sanguine satellite | lee minho
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Summary: The last time you saw Minho was five years ago when you rejected him to live out the rest of your twenties in the city. The next time you see him is on your birthday with another woman in his arms, and it sparked everything that was good, bad, and ugly. Now, after years of not being in each other’s lives, Minho tries to repair the friendship he broke while you fight your changing feelings. As you struggle navigating your friendship with him, you struggle more to navigate being single in this next stage of your life. Characters: Lee Minho x fem!Reader, feat. other idols Genre: friends-to-strangers-to-lovers, romance, angst, emotional hurt with comfort, happy ending, slice of life Additional warnings: cheating, alcohol consumption, food, aged up a bit and in turn age insecurity, a lot of mentions of a best friend with another idol WC: 18.1k
Today was a pivotal day in the office. Quarter two earnings were released to the public and other divisions of the company and, well, let’s just say with the increasing rise in inflation and the impending recession that everyone refuses to acknowledge, no one wants to buy anything. As a result, the earnings reported negative and stocks dipped, morale was low, and to top it off, it was only Monday.
In a way, this was a metaphor for your life; a tumbleweed of all things that could go wrong did go wrong and formed into an amalgamation of nothing to show for. Some people found value in the mundane, but this was supposed to be the peak of your career, your magnum opus, before progress plateaued and you couldn’t stand the idea of not feeling enriched. To wake up, leave, work, and go home was the reason you wanted to leave your home in the first place for something richer in the heart of the city. But you felt defeated after clocking out at 8:30 PM and slumped on the seat in an empty train cart.
The view of the lively apartment high rises and the warm light of slow brick-and-mortars made the late night train rides worth the twenty minutes. Work wasn’t always this draining, but after climbing the corporate ladder, more money meant more responsibilities and it quickly drained the light from your eyes as it did with many of your peers and friends. Youth was fleeting and today you felt like Ponce de Leon searching for the fountain to no avail, but at least the train would take you as close to it as it possibly could.
After packing up your life from home five years ago to move with your friends, the only plans twenty-something-year-olds ever had in place were reservations at 9:00 PM because you called the hottest spot the day-of and drinks at the bar next door after clocking out at 5:00 PM. You were young, excited, and hungry for life, barely sober most days and experiencing what it meant to be young; but what must be given, something must also be taken. Now, rent was rising, salary increases were few and far in between, and instead of deciding what martini you should be ordering, you were stuck wondering if being a worker bee individual contributor was worth the lull schedule or if taking the path to management and telling whiny subordinates what to do was worth the salary bump.
You and your friends once joked that stuff like this was what people in their thirties worry about. Today is your thirtieth birthday.
You didn’t have time for dinner and once again thanked the real estate Gods who put a restaurant so greasy at the corner of your block that you practically slid on a snail trail to the front door of your loft. So, here you were; eating under-salted french fries, chugging a crispy diet cola, with oil stains on your white button-up, ready to spend the rest of your birthday and probably the rest of your life alone on your overpriced and uncomfortable couch watching the latest drama you’d sob your eyes out to. All you needed now was a pet as your companion and you’d be the whole single-in-your-thirties package. Maybe you’d use that as leverage in your dating apps: looking for a partner, a pet, or both.
After fumbling with the keys, you sighed into your dark, cavernous home and dropped your bag at the door. When you turned on the lights, you saw the ghost of your soul leave your mouth in a loud gasp.
“Surprise!!”
You were greeted with streamers, glitter, balloons, and your closest friends wearing little party hats with their beautiful smiles. You never doubted they remembered, and most wished you happy birthday at midnight, but you should have sensed something was wrong when Chaeryoung asked for your door passcode because she ‘forgot her chapstick on your coffee table.’
She was the first to tackle you in a tight hug. “Happy birthday, mi amor!”
“Let the woman take her shoes off first, damn,” Jisung scolded.
“Wow, there’s certainly a lot of you,” you giggled after prying her off. “You guys shouldn’t have. Really! It’s Monday.”
“All the more to celebrate something worthwhile,” Chan grinned, handing you a glass of wine. “Welcome to the club.”
“Ugh, thanks.” Chaeryoung yanked away the oily bag of fries while you were distracted with the happy juice. “Hey, I’m hungry!”
“Don’t fret! We are having a dinner party because that’s what thirty-year-olds do.”
“Except we ate already because we thought you were coming home well before 9:00 PM,” Hyunjin grinned sheepishly.
“No, yeah, I love when my friends watch me stuff my face.”
The dining table was decorated with burgundy candle sticks, red roses, and black bows. It was definitely a step-up from your twenty-first bubblegum pink and pastel confetti birthday, but this almost seemed… meek? Romantic, sure, but a little dark for a birthday. As Chaeryoung scrambled to fill your plate with take-out and prepare the cake, everyone took their place back at the table. The lights dimmed and out came a jet black cake with a toy knife and red frosting that read, ‘Happy Deathday to Your 20s!’
“A bit dark, but accurate,” you mused.
“Make a wish-!” A knock came at the door. “Shit.”
Everyone looked at each other awkwardly. Chaeryoung, Chan, Hyunjin, Jisung, and their partners were present and those were the only people you regularly hung out with. Who could be left?
“Are people still coming?” you asked.
The boys collectively shot a look at a wide-eyed and frozen Chaeryoung, none of them willing to break the news or catch a stray. “Um…”
“What did you do?” you accused. “You didn’t invite that one guy I told you about last month, did you?”
“No, but I wish I had.” Another knock. “Coming!”
“It’s not a coworker, is it?”
“Worse,” Jisung mumbled. “For you, at least.”
“Minho!” Chaeryoung exclaimed happily. “You’re just in time!”
“What -” you hissed at the boys, “- the hell?!”
They all held their hands up in defense. Minho passed the threshold and your twenties flashed before your eyes. The once blondish short and styled middle part now hung loose in soft chocolate strands; eyes that once held the universe were dark and doe-like; and arms that once moved freely in his sleeves now tightened around them. He was a completely different man who you hadn’t seen in five years and here he was at a pivotal moment of your life, about to celebrate you and the life you’ve lived without him for the better half of the last decade. It took all your might to lift your sore legs to walk over to greet your guest and restrain from strangling your best friend. He wore clothes appropriate for a casual dinner party that didn’t spill into the blues of corporate-wear, clearly aware of this occasion, and a small gift bag. His appearance was intentional, not upon happenstance, which made this whole ordeal a lot weirder.
Following him in, hand-in-hand, was a woman. A stranger. Two strangers in your home.
He pulled away from Chaeryoung’s death grip and you locked eyes. It’s awkward, to put it politely; to put it rudely, it was horrifying. Your nervous system certainly felt nervous, firing fight-or-flight responses the way he drank you in like the first sip of a bitter negroni. How someone could evolve and change to the point of being unrecognizable should be studied by Darwin.
He’s the first to break with a small smile to ease the tension. “Hi.”
“Hi,” you breathed.
“Happy birthday, _____.”
The bag is small and neatly wrapped with care in your favorite colors. The woman behind him smiled sweetly. “Thank you. You really shouldn’t have. And thank you…?”
“Oh, right. This is Karina, my girlfriend of two years.”
“It’s nice to finally meet you,” she said. “I’ve heard a lot about you. And happy birthday!”
You brain buffered when she bowed. How awkward, because you haven’t heard anything about her other than her existence. You never thought he’d have someone so beautiful. Minho blocked you on social media a long time ago, so you wouldn’t have recognized her. Chaeryoung had to kick you back to life. “Ah, it’s nice to meet you, too! Welcome to my home.”
“There’s wax on the cake!” Jisung warned.
“Oh, hurry in! _____ was about to make a wish!” Chaeryoung pushed the three of you to the dining area.
There’s a bitter taste on your tongue watching him dap up the boys and watching her hug them so warmly. You never faulted them for being neutral. They were just as much as his friends as they were yours but having him here created a thick glass wall on your side of the table, like he was icing you out in your own home; that you paid with your own hard-earned money, mind you! This was as close to a defense mechanism you could build.
Nine people were watching you, all of whom were paired with another in the room except Chaeryoung, in your home. There’s a heavy shroud of dread that’s draped over your makeshift invisible box you struggled to keep upright. This was supposed to feel like a celebration of you, but it quickly turned rotten when you realized you were the only single person on your own side of the table, being made a spectacle as the couples moved closer and watched more intently. It was like they were watching a ghost of singles-past, feeling more appreciative of the life they procured together as you watched their hold on each other tighten ever so slightly.
“Make a wish,” Jisung sang.
You stared blankly at the three sparkling candles. What was there to wish for? You had a good career, a warm home, food on the table, and loved ones who kept you up on your feet. You supposed a better work-life balance would be feasible, but that was something within reach and in your control. To wish is to pray and to pray is to beg, and you weren’t one to beg for anything except for the pickles Chaeryoung picked out of her sandwiches. What was something that even you couldn’t control, something you had to ask some spirit dwelling in the ether for?
A flash of Minho’s eyes boring into yours made your face hot. Maybe you’d just let this wish go to waste instead.
You blew out the candles and applause erupted with Chan eager to cut into the cake. It was your favorite flavor from your favorite local baker whom you trusted every birthday and holiday to deliver the finest treats. At least this part of your birthday was perfect.
“So, what does thirty feel like?” Hyunjin asked. “Do you want the number of the senior home down the street from me?”
“Ha ha,” you drawled. “Aren’t you next, Hwang?”
“Actually, Minho’s next – ow!”
Chaeryong didn’t hide how she elbowed his ribs. She then gave a wide smile and her fingers danced. “Do you feel more mature?”
“As mature as a dry-age steak.”
“Well, you pair well with red wine, at least.” Chan raised his glass. “Here’s to you and to all of us, our priceless friendship!”
Most of us, you wanted to correct, but decided against being uncouth. “Cheers!”
When you were all in the younger halves of the twenties, conversations were about memes, pop culture, and the new hottest bar that just opened. Now, as you were ranting about quarter one earnings and the Windows 11 update, the others doubled down on the corporate jargon. Even Karina, who revealed she was a consultant in tech, participated in the conversations. Minho was the only one who remained quiet, but he was simply enjoying the company, leaning back in the chair with his arm around his woman. For someone who had never visited or even wished well on past birthdays, he was making himself quite at home.
Your birthday dinner lasted long enough to finish off three bottles of wine between everyone and for all the food to disappear, making clean-up much easier. As everyone scrambled around your home clouded in buzzed-up nonsense, Jisung was the one to tour your apartment with Minho and Karina, telling the tale of every picture you hung on a wall or framed on a credenza.
“This was when we went to London one summer after my graduation,” he said. “I’m the youngest, so I was the last one and we decided to make it a big celebration. I think this was the day Minho and _____ got lost and almost hopped on a train to Edinburgh by accident. This one was from Chaeryoung’s twenty-fourth birthday. I think Minho took this picture, actually.”
“Where are you in these pictures, Minho?” Karina wondered innocently.
There’s a breath of silence in the loft aside from you who didn’t pay any mind to his girlfriend’s ignorance. Not like you expect your fallout to be a topic of conversation over a candle-lit dinner date, anyway. You also didn’t expect that look on Minho’s face when he realized that to be true.
“He’s usually the one behind the camera!” Jisung answered, not exactly lying. “You’ve seen his Instagram and how he composes his cat pictures.”
Minho didn’t try to correct him, and they quickly moved on.
As it was the first day of the working week, Chan, Hyunjin, Jisung, and their partners were the first to leave. For whatever reason, Minho and Karina decided to stay back. Karina’s motive was unclear; either she was really bad at reading the room or the effort to be friends was genuine, but even when Minho asked if she wanted to leave with everyone, she decided against it.
“Let me help you take the garbage out,” she offered Chaeryoung.
“I can do it,” you and Minho said in unison.
“Nonsense! It’s your birthday and this one had a little too much to drink before coming here and when we got here.”
Chaeryoung gave you a sympathetic look as they carried several bags out to the ground floor. What a convenient day for the chute to be broken! They’d take the five-to-ten minutes of traveling to the ground floor out to the back where the bins were.
And then there were two, standing on opposite sides of the kitchen island, unable to look each other in the eyes after five years of abandonment.
“Hi,” he greeted again, lips flat-lined and unsure of how to move this conversation forward.
You beat around the bush. “What are you doing here?”
His tongue poked his cheek. “I ran into Chaeryoung last weekend at the bar I work at and asked what she was doing for your birthday.”
“Why would you ask that?” you asked coldly.
“I… just knew she'd be doing something for you. Maybe she took it as me asking to get invited, but that wasn’t my intention. I think she panicked, invited me anyway, and here I am.”
“You could’ve said no.”
“I could’ve,” he agreed, and there’s a mischievous twinkle in his eyes that asked, ‘but why would I?’
You looked away. “Isn’t this a far drive for you?”
“I live here now. Well, not here; on the other side, closer to downtown and near that bar.”
“Oh. How long have you been a city dweller?”
“About two years now.”
That lined up with his relationship status. It was a fact that it was easier to find partners in the metropolitan, yet somehow you were the only one to remain alone after being one of the first to move here. How was it that Minho managed that in under a month? And if he’s been here for two years, how have you not realized that?
You swallowed the rest of the wine in your glass. “How do you like it?”
“I love it.” He ran a hand through his tired head of hair, creating a split down the middle. The redness on his face had spread from his nose to his cheeks, as it always did when alcohol invaded his bloodstream. “I see why you wanted to move here.”
He, too, must have seen how time was of the essence, and with what little time you have in your young lives, the highest quality of life would be to live where your peers were thriving. If only he understood this years ago.
You nodded sourly, feeling the loneliness resurface after having to repress it for so long. “I’m happy for you.”
“Your mother once told us, ‘mean what you say and say what you mean.’ You don’t have to lie.”
“Don’t tell me what my mother says.”
Tension as thick as jell-o separated you from him. There’s a brief stare down after your threat, or what sounded like a threat, and you swear there’s hurt behind those big eyes of his, but he wouldn’t be the victim here; not when he was the one who left your life and blocked you out of his. He didn’t have the right to be offended by your unwelcoming attitude when he was never welcome to begin with. On your birthday, at that.
Chaeryoung saved the evening and rushed back inside, afraid of the damage you’d tell her later.
“Ready?” Karina asked, squeezing Minho’s bicep.
“Yeah,” he mumbled, being the first to break contact. You didn’t help him see his way out, but he said over his shoulder once more, “Happy birthday, _____.”
“Thank you for coming,” you called out sharply.
“It was nice meeting you!” Karina said cheerfully.
“You, too.”
Chaeryoung, the kind woman and hostess as she is, hugged them both and hastened to lock the door. She rushed back, clinging to you and holding your arms inside, likely afraid that you’d break something or chug the rest of the fourth bottle.
“I’m so~o sorry!”
“He told me how it happened. Tell me why I’m not surprised?”
“It was at the bar near your work that I told you about. You didn’t come because you had some reports to submit before midnight. And who do I see behind the bar? Minho, of all people! He was running that shit like the navy! It was hard to talk long over the music, but we said our hellos and he quickly brought up the fact you were turning thirty and asked what I was doing because he knows how much I love you and I’m the bestest friend ever – Anyway, I told him about the surprise, and he looked so damn sad! Jesus Christ, so you know me, an empath, I had to at least offer him an invite. I didn’t think he’d take it, nor did I think he’d ask to bring a plus one, like, yesterday!”
In the midst of her ramblings, you squirmed free from her grip and pulled the poor pouty girl into a tight hug. “I will not let him ruin what you’ve done for me. I love you and appreciate you.”
“It was so hard!” she whined. “The boys are so unreliable! I ask them to buy something for decorations, they don’t answer, and when I ask a few days later they’re like, ‘I got it a while ago,’ and I’m like, ‘why didn’t you say something?!’ and they’re like, ‘I didn’t think I’d need to as long as I brought it the day-of.’ Can you believe that?!”
“After over ten years of friendship, yes, yes I can.”
After cleaning up the remaining crumbs and dishes, Chaeryoung found the gift that Minho and Karina left on one of the chairs. “Did you open it?”
“No. What if it’s a bomb? Can you do it?”
She tossed out the tissue paper and peered inside fearlessly. “Oh!”
“What is it?”
“A gift card and a perfume bottle; a pricey one. Ooh, it smells good!”
The gift card was to a new bar that was opening on the same block as your office. Your boss was excited to finally have a happy hour location so close that you haven’t gone a day without hearing about it since its announcement. The name on the card said ‘DAHLIA’ and the amount it held was five hundred dollars.
“Huh,” Chaeryoung mused, ���isn’t this address very close to where you work? And you like dahlias. Scary coincidence.”
“Do you think he’s stalking me?”
“Maybe it’s Karina.”
The perfume was in a sleek clear bottle with a white face and gold cap. It smelled of marshmallows, orange blossoms, and neroli. It would be the most expensive thing you’d own, cosmetics wise.
“They open on Friday,” she said giddily. “We should go!”
The projected menu on their social media did look really good… and they had variations of your favorite drink and ones you’ve never heard of.
“Think of it as a ‘celebration’ to the start of a new quarter! Since it’ll be slower now, right?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, accepting that poor-quality reasoning for a twenty dollar cocktail. “Ok, let’s go!”
Your best friend squealed happily and dug through your closet, plucking out the shortest skirt in your wardrobe.
--
On Thursday, Chaeryoung canceled on you to go on a third date with the guy she’s been seriously interested in. She was hoping to finally become an exclusive dating couple; not exactly boyfriend-and-girlfriend, but they’re not allowed to see other people since they’re exclusive, so it’s a label-without-the-label situation that you struggled too hard to grasp. If the majority of your peers thought that way about dating, maybe it was a good thing you remained single.
When you exited your office’s high-rise that day, on your way to the train, you passed by an alley in between the Italian place and the coffee shop you and your co-workers frequented. There was an inconspicuous red ‘OPEN’ light at the end above a black door that caught your attention. In a small serif font, the letters ‘DAHLIA’ was stamped on the door. Friday was supposed to be the official opening day according to their social media pages, but there was no mistake it was open as indicated by the bouncer standing guard.
You did have the gift card in your wallet, and you were craving that crispy green tea highball they had in one of their posts. It was only 6:00 PM, maybe they’d have some happy hour deals going on and you could report back to Chaeryoung with your findings.
You walked up to the doorman. “Hi, are you open –”
“I.D.”
Well, that answers that. He allowed you to pass into the low-lit glowing bar. It wasn’t busy like a Friday evening, but almost all of the tufted couches and chairs were filled, leaving a semi-vacant bar up for grabs. The aura of the bar is what one might describe as ‘vibey and chill’, as the low hum of the bass from the hip-hop song in the background vibrated your heart. This was as soft as a soft-opening could get.
On the menu, there was a special on the drink you were looking forward to and a snack pairing: rice paper and seaweed chips with a salt and togarashi seasoning. You knew all those words separately but couldn’t comprehend them together.
“I.D., please,” the bartender asked.
You fumbled for your wallet and mumbled, “Why bother carding at the door if you’re just –”
You dropped your wallet when you saw Minho at the other side of the bar in a white button-down that was buttoned barely half-way. His lips curled teasingly.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” you gasped, popping your head up after picking up your wallet. “What are you doing here?”
“Is that the only way you’ll greet me from now on?”
You felt your face burn even before any alcohol entered your system. “Chaeryoung mentioned you worked at the other bar nearby.”
“I own that one, too. This one I just opened.”
“Oh, well, that makes more sense. Wait, ‘own’?” He nodded sheepishly. “But that bar has been there forever. I thought that old guy owned it?”
“He was looking to retire, so I jumped the gun and bought it. Kept it mostly the same, added some things I thought would pick up a trend, and it did so well that I was able to open ‘DAHLIA’.”
“That’s incredible,” you congratulated. “I guess I shouldn’t feel so bad that the gift card is so expensive.”
He smiled, but it didn’t translate to his eyes. “Do you work nearby?”
“At the tall building down the street.”
He’s just as taken back as you are. Maybe he wasn’t stalking you. “Crazy coincidence. But it’s late already. Long day?”
You sighed. “Most days are this long.”
“Yikes. Can I get you a drink?”
“The green tea highball looks good.”
“Coming right up.”
Minho rolled up his sleeves to his elbows and did his witchcraft. In a highball glass, a ludicrously elongated ice cube was placed. Then, two shots of Japanese whiskey from the mid-shelf (never mind the overpour), an ounce of cold brew jasmine green tea, and what little space was left was topped with club soda. Using a long bar spoon, Minho mixed its contents and offered it to you with a stainless steel straw.
You hummed happily. “Whoa.”
“I agree.”
“Where was this on my twenty-first?”
“I dare you to Google the whiskey I used and see if you think we could have afforded that at twenty-one.”
“I see your point.”
There’s a long pause of waiting for the other to say what they mean and to mean what they say. You thought about how coldly you displayed yourself to Minho and it ate up your thoughts the whole week. Even when he was the one who wanted you out of his life, he was the one to find you and it seemed he was here to stay, to be next to where you worked, and to be a part of your everyday life as you’d think about him every time you passed this alley between the office and the train. Was this a gift or a curse?
The wound was still fresh, but he was not the only one to blame.
You cleared your throat. “Listen, I –”
“I think –”
You both paused again. After all these years, your wavelengths were still in sync.
“Go ahead,” you offered.
“I think…” …We shouldn’t talk when we see each other? I shouldn’t have given you a gift? We should unpack the trauma we gave each other over coffee some time? “You should try the snack pairing.”
Possibly the best words to leave his lips. “Please.”
“One sec,” he said before running to the kitchen.
Your palms were sweaty, but if anyone asked, you’d feign it was from the condensation on the glass. Your first real conversation with Minho in five years was more stressful than presenting to upper management. Any courage of apologizing had fizzled and the fear of being vulnerable was chilling. You hoped the rest of the drink would give you that push.
Minho came back slightly breathless with a bowl of curly seaweed and rice chips with red seasoning. He stared at the glass that was almost full just a second ago.
“Would you like another one?”
Your vision was already swirly. “No, thank you. But these look delicious.”
The crunch from the fried rice paper was loud enough to make some heads turn. It was salty and the seaweed flavor shined through. The punch from the togarashi made you wish you had taken up the offer on another drink.
You let out another happy hum, and your sinuses cleared. “Wasabi!”
“Really sobers you up, huh?”
“I can smell colors.”
He let out a genuine laugh and you got a glance of his little bunny teeth. You wondered if he’d still have them when he was sixty.
The shy bartender fiddled with the kitchen towel. “You were going to say something?”
“Right. I’m –”
“Excuse me!” a customer approached the bar. “Can I have an espresso martini?”
“Absolutely!” Minho said in his customer service voice.
Espresso martinis were all the craze these days, especially with the ladies. You understood why, they were delicious and reminded everyone of a sweet little treat before the work day. You watched as Minho threw in his Boston shaker ice, vodka, coffee liqueur, and cold brew, and shook with all his might. The muscles you noticed on your birthday shined through, as the veins on his forearms and biceps were put to work. Your eyes traveled shamefully to his open chest, focusing on the groove in between. He poured the creamy drink into a martini glass and added it to her tab.
You drank the complimentary ice-cold water before he returned.
“Sorry about that.”
“No, no, I’m the one interrupting your work.” Despite drinking a multitude of fluids, your throat was dry and sharp, like the words were scraping skin on their way out. Just say it, dammit! “I’m sorry how I treated you on Monday.”
He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have ambushed you like that after so long.”
“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have.”
“For that, I’m sorry. But I’m not sorry for attending.”
“You should have chosen another time to meet.”
“Your thirtieth birthday is important. It’s a huge milestone. I couldn’t dream of missing it.”
“I don’t think that’s for you to decide.”
He hung his head in a way that a puppy would when being punished. “I know.”
“You –” you choked. “I don’t know. I don’t know what or how to feel.”
“Maybe we could start over.”
“Start over?”
“Hi,” he held out his hand for you to shake. “I’m Minho, I’m a bartender and chef, and we met when we were nineteen.”
“Minho –”
“Would you like to get coffee next door some time?”
“You are ridiculous.”
The rush of after-work over timers hit the bar like a thirsty school of fish. Two other bartenders jumped in, but they needed Minho to keep up a good speed. From his navy pants pocket, he pulled out his business card and slid it over.
“My number’s on the card.”
It was different from the one you had saved on your phone and he knew that. “Wait, I need to close out my tab.”
“It’s on me. Let me make up for Monday.”
He didn’t allow you to get a word in before taking the next customer. His mannerisms made every customer smile or blush. ‘Come closer’ he’d gesture with his finger, leaning in to hear their order, and winking after handing off the final product; rinse and repeat.
You left a hefty tip under your glass and slipped away from the crowd. At home, you spent half an hour rubbing your cheeks, unaware of how sore they were after the train ride.
--
The business card hung on your fridge under a London magnet. Every day, you’d wake up, stare at it while filling your water bottle, leave for work, come home, and stare at it some more as you prepared dinner. In the same serif font in black ink, in the center of the card was his full name. Under it said ‘Restauranteur’, followed by ‘DAHLIA’, the Japanese flavors-inspired bar, and ‘RED LIGHT’, the one with American flavors. His phone number and email were in small print, all information embossed on an off-white business card. ‘Classy’ was the most appropriate description of such a card, while yours was so plain in comparison. Technology products didn’t need that kind of pizazz, to be fair.
The next time you saw Chaeryoung was for a girls’ night-in on a Wednesday to gush about her new exclusive not-boyfriend. She noticed the business card while putting the dishes in the sink and plucked it from the fridge, already aware of what transpired on Thursday before.
“‘Restauranteur’,” she scoffed. “Ok, Minho.”
“I know, right? Can you believe he bought out that sleazy old man?”
“I always wondered why the quality went up all of a sudden. I can’t believe he hid that from everyone else, too! We’ve all been meeting around that area for months! Why did he give you this, though?”
“I guess he changed his number.”
“What? He’s had this number for a while now.” You shot her a deadpanned look. “Oh, right. You wouldn’t have known whether he changed it or not. Did you hit him up?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Why would I? It feels… too soon.”
“Five years feels too soon?”
“No,” you sighed, unable to form the words in the right sentence. “We’re already on awkward footing after my birthday. And seeing and talking to him made my blood pressure spike to an unhealthy degree.”
“So, you’re nervous?”
Nervous wasn’t right. It felt much deeper than that. “Afraid.”
If anyone knew the degree of pain and confusion you held for Minho, it was Chaeryoung. She always did her best to understand, but there are some things one must experience to understand, and this was one of them. She held you firm by the shoulders and knitted her brows.
“Give me your phone.”
“What?”
The music streaming on your phone paused as your best friend moved swiftly to the couch, already propping her feet up on the chaise before you could register what happened. The clicking of your phone keyboard over the bluetooth speaker snapped you back and you ran to join her.
“Wait, don’t!” you warned.
“‘Hey, bro’,” she said as she typed, “Too casual?”
“I’m thirty. I don’t say ‘bro’.”
“All right, jeez. ‘Hello, Minho. I hope this text finds you well. Per our last meeting – ’”
“Now you’re just being a dick.”
“I’m kidding, relax! ‘Hi, it’s _____. It was nice seeing you on Thursday.’”
“I wouldn’t say it was a ‘nice’ meeting.”
“Oh, my God, shut up. ‘Good to see you on Thursday,’ happy? ‘Would you like to get coffee some time?’ And send. This is fun, it’s like when we used to project our dating app DMs on the TV! Oh, wow he’s typing already. Asshole, he never answers any of us in the group chats until the next day.”
Texting a boy and sweating, waiting for his response… Were you thirteen again? The notification ding made your heart jump.
Your brows furrowed, matching Chaeryoung’s. “‘Hey! Of course I would. Just tell me when.’ Um. Tell him sometime next week?”
“‘Tomorrow at 11:00AM?’”
“Chaer!”
“‘See you then.’ You’re welcome!” she cheered, tossing your phone on your lap.
“Now he’ll think I’m excited…”
“Whether you are nervous, excited, or afraid, shouldn’t that mean something? That maybe you still have him in your cold, dead heart somewhere?”
“It took years of therapy to heal what was wounded. I don’t know if this will feel like closure or if I’m opening up my stitches.”
“And I’ll be here to help suture if it comes to it; again and again!” she encouraged, leaning her head on your shoulder. “I just want our friend group back together, you know? This is a start, sort of.”
“I know. Don’t get your hopes up, though.”
“Too late.”
--
The day it happened, the clouds were grey, and they cried and cried, pouring down the heaviest rain of the year. It rattled Minho’s windows like bullets made from hail, drowning the silence and filling the room with nothing but sorrow.
Tonight, you were celebrating your new job and the big move. After the plates were emptied, the music that played over his speakers slowed, and filled with wine and tenderness, you two swayed to the rhythm in each other’s arms. First, he had your hand in his and lightly hovered over your waist, leading the waltz across the living room with ease. As the songs progressed, his hold on you tightened. He laced his fingers with yours, traveled his hand to your lower back, then placed the other there, too, after wrapping your arm around his neck. He pressed his forehead to yours, the tips of your noses touching and nuzzling so sweetly it made your heart soar.
He sighed happily, shoulders relaxing under your arms. “Should we be doing this?”
“Hm, I don’t know,” you replied light heartedly, “you are just a friend, after all.”
“Do friends do this? Should we ask Chaeryoung and Jisung?”
“Not if you want to hear them gagging all night.”
His breathy laughs hit your lips and his eyes fluttered closed. “I want to kiss you.”
You’ve wanted to kiss him for five years. “Then kiss me.”
“And I want you to stay.”
“Stay?” You took a step back, hating the cold air that replaced his space. “What do you mean ‘stay’?”
“Don’t leave,” he begged.
“Minho –”
“Stay here with me.”
“No,” you said firmly. “This is the biggest thing to happen to my career, and I’m not throwing away this grand opportunity. Won’t you come with me instead?”
“You know I can’t leave my family right now.”
“Then,” you sighed, “do I wait for you?”
“Wait? We have options; what about long distance?”
“You know how vigorous my career is. I work long days and long nights. I can’t call you or text you the way that other people do.”
“So what?” he argued, throwing his hands up in frustration.
This was the first time you were having this talk. Never before had either of you revealed the feelings that mingled in the air whenever you were in the same room together. For years, you repressed them, too scared to cross the thin line that separated friendship from lovers and unwilling to feel vulnerable and reveal the true feelings of your heart. Because truthfully, you wouldn’t have time. You wouldn’t have time to drain and pour your heart into something – someone – that wasn’t the projects that laid out on your office desk, and how was that fair to someone you loved so dearly? As much as you wanted to love and to give, you couldn’t.
“I can’t,” you repeated. “That’s not fair to either of us. We deserve one hundred percent of each other, not fifty, or even ninety.”
“You’re not even willing to try?” he mumbled.
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. “How could you spring this on me the weekend before I leave?”
“This was my only chance –”
“No, it wasn’t. You had five years. Five years! And you know how important my career is to me!”
“What about me? Aren’t I important to you, too?”
“Don’t,” you stuttered.
“No, it’s not that I’m not important, it’s that your career is more important. Is that it?” When you couldn’t answer, he nodded his head, accepting the poor answer. “All I wanted was for us to try.”
“I can’t give you one hundred percent of me.”
“Then I’ll give more! One hundred ten percent; one hundred fifty!”
“How long can you last like that when you don’t know when we’ll be together again?”
“I won’t know unless we try.”
“I don’t want to try. Trying means uncertainty. For five years, I have been certain about you. But I’m certain it won’t work when we are not present.”
“We’re going in circles.” Minho turned and ran a hand through his fluffy, light bronze hair. This color on him, you remembered, made him look so young.
“I can wait,” you whispered. “We can be friends still, and –”
“I don’t want to be friends.”
You couldn’t decide if your mouth should hang open or sew it shut forever. Still, you managed to slip out, “What?”
“It’s all or nothing for me, _____.” His eyes mirrored your glossy ones and the tip of his nose that was just on yours a second ago was reddening. “I don’t want friendship with you. I want love and passion, and I want you to tell me you want it, too. We aren’t friends; we never were really just friends, you know that, don’t you?”
“I know.”
He closed the gap and his hands found yours, squeezing so tightly it was almost painful. “Then show me that you know! Tell me you want this! Tell me you don’t want to be just friends! Tell me you want me, desire me, that you can’t go a day without having me, the way I would for you!”
You shook your head. Long distance relationships never worked. You witnessed it through your coworkers, through friends, and bosses, and even old classmates who had deleted every existence of their past love and left no digital footprint on their timeline. Every relationship you ever knew to be long distance had never worked out, and you knew this one wouldn’t be any different.
He let go and stepped away. “I wish you a fulfilling life in the city –”
“Don’t do this.”
“– and I’m sorry, but I can’t be friends with you –”
“Minho, please…”
“– I can’t be just friends with someone who has my heart and doesn’t know what to do with it.”
Instead of rescinding, instead of apologizing and taking the leap of faith, taking the risk that came with being vulnerable and open and raw so you could see what it meant to be loved and cherished by someone who wanted to love and cherish, you decided to lock your heart away and to never reveal it to anyone ever again.
That was the last time you saw Minho. On your thirtieth birthday, he broke every layer you built to protect yourself in a matter of seconds.
--
“Earth to _____!”
In between ‘DAHLIA’ and your office, there was a coffee shop with outside seating. As you waited at one of the tables, the record player in your head had recalled that night, and once it started, it wouldn’t stop until it finished. Just as you finished, Minho arrived and waved a hand in front of your face and you wondered how long it took for you to notice.
“Sorry! Daydreaming.”
“About work?”
Did he truly think your mind was entirely consumed about work? “Yeah. Work.”
“Well, you keep daydreaming, and I’ll get us coffee. What would you like?”
“No, it’s my turn to get you something!”
“Nonsense! You also tipped me way too much. You still order the usual?”
If you were one thing, you were consistent. “The usual.”
Minho would do this finger-gun thing when he was feeling awkward, and he did so as he walked to the counter. His outfit wasn’t as formal as the night you saw him at the bar. His jeans were black and his sweater a bright cobalt; a color that allowed him to be the center of attention when he wasn’t asking for it.
You were the one to ask him to meet - or rather Chaeryoung was - but you didn’t consider what you’d talk about.
He came back with your usual and his usual, which was an iced americano. At least he, too, was consistent, and that hadn’t changed.
“Busy at work?” he asked, clearly not sure what to talk about, either.
“Yeah. Always busy, sadly.”
“You weren’t kidding when you said your hours would be long.”
“No,” you confirmed, “I wasn’t. What about you? What’s your work day like as the city’s coolest restaurateur?”
“You flatter me. I work at ‘RED LIGHT’ during the day, and head to ‘DAHLIA’ at night.”
You tried to estimate his work hours in your head. “Back-to-back?”
“Yup.”
“Everyday?”
“Kind of. If it’s slow on like, a Monday or Tuesday, I’ll head out early and let the closers handle it. Otherwise, my day off is whenever I feel like it, but it’s not a real day-off. I use those days to answer emails and organize the budget or the inventory. Takes every waking moment to run a restaurant or bar, you know?”
“I don’t know. How do you balance everything?”
“Well, I love my job. It’s hard, but I don’t find it draining. I guess that helps. I don’t mind waking up at five in the morning, working, and going to sleep, at least not yet. I’m sure I’ll hit a wall someday, but I’m doing my best to not let that happen.”
You’re afraid to ask the next question. “How do you balance your relationship with Karina when you’re so busy?”
“Phone calls, Facetime, designated nights for dates, surprise visits, little gifts and flowers here and there,” he nodded, looking at the table. “It’s hard, but we’re trying. That’s what’s important.”
Your coffee’s bitter and you didn’t want to bother with it after a couple of sips, but you keep at it to keep your lips occupied and to hide the way your teeth grit at the underlying accusation. “That takes a lot of patience. Some people struggle with that.”
He caught your drift and it appeared he realized he deserved that. “And you? Seeing anyone?”
“No.”
“Not even casually?”
“No. Some dates here and there, but they never stick.”
“Why is that?”
“Either they’re boring, too intimidated by a strong female corporate supplicant, or I’m the problem.”
“Isn’t it -” he began but stopped himself. “Never mind.”
“Say what you mean,” you pushed light heartedly.
“Isn’t it lonely?”
It’s true that it seemed like Cupid made his way around your friend group and you were the last to get hit. When your friends came home at night, they’d be welcomed into open arms and warm bodies. You came home to snacks and warmth was in the form of a fuzzy blanket you kept on the couch. At the height of your career, you once believed that love could wait, that it would find you at the right time and you’d know right then you were ready. As Minho sat across from you picking your brain about the emptiness that came with climbing the corporate ladder, the fear of feeling incomplete was imminent.
You wouldn’t let him see that part of you.
“I like my alone time.”
“But you have so much love in your heart.” He cleared his throat, regretting the arrangement of those words when he saw how your face twisted. What would he know about what’s in your heart? “Who do you give your affections to?”
“Must it be romantic?” you retorted. “My love is given to those you saw on my birthday.”
“I guess not. You’ve always been a romantic, though.”
“Five years is more than enough time to change who I was the last time you saw me.”
“Is that change good?” he asked nervously.
‘Is the result of feeling loveless from rejection and isolation a good change? Are you an idiot?’ you wanted to ask. But that would put the blame on him and blaming him meant acknowledging how much he affected you after all these years.
“Is that change good,” you repeated thoughtfully. “Neutral.”
“Neutral?”
“I think the decision we made five years ago put us where we are today; we’re both successful young adults thriving in a beautiful city. But I lost you as a result. So, the good must come with some bad. That’s neutral, no?”
His lips formed a smile, but again, it did not travel to his eyes. “You know, I was scared to come here today.”
“I’m not that terrifying, am I?”
“At first I thought, ‘wow, Chaeryoung did not try hard to pretend to be you at all.’”
You giggled. “No; no, she didn’t.”
“And then I thought, ‘we’ll be in public. She won’t kill me in front of people, right?’”
“Kill you!”
“But I know that wouldn’t have stopped you either way,” he grinned. “You haven’t killed me yet. Is it crazy of me to think of this as a good sign?”
“A sign! Is there something you’re looking to gain out of this meeting?” you teased.
“Yes,” he admitted, “a friend.”
Your mouth hung open slightly, unsure of what to say, but your face twisted in a way that mimicked your thoughts. “A friend?”
“I know you and I have said and done some unkind things back then that we may not be able to forgive each other for, but after seeing you on your birthday, I couldn’t stop thinking of you. You may not believe me, but I miss you.”
Your head and your heart were in conflict. You had spent all this time trying not to miss him. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, unwilling to say the truth. “I… I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t be. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you all of a sudden. But… do you think it’s possible? That we could be friends again?”
How quickly would you lose him a second time? “I think we shouldn’t force it.”
“Friendships bloom naturally, of course.”
A flash of pink blurred your peripherals before it became the center of your attention. Karina held a finger to her lips as she approached Minho from behind, covering his eyes with her slender fingers. He took her hand and kissed it, leaning back to look at his glittering diamond with hearts in his eyes. They were a beautiful couple and it was as clear as day how much they adored each other. Witnessing love was supposed to be like looking at a garden of roses, but as you sat across in a front-row seat, you thought to yourself how much you disliked the smell of roses, anyway.
“Hi!” she greeted happily. “Sorry to interrupt, but we have lunch plans.”
You shook your head, dismissing the tightness in your gut. “No, please interrupt. I’m sorry for keeping him.”
“Would you like to join?”
You would rather jump off the roof of your fifty-floor office building. “Thank you, but I made plans with my co-workers already.”
“Then, we’ll have to get dinner some time!”
It pained you how much you disliked her. She didn’t deserve it. “Dinner some time sounds great.”
As Minho got up to leave, he leaned over the table and in a hushed tone said, “I just want you to know that you still cannot hide your feelings on your face.”
“My boss thinks it’s my killing charm.”
“That’s one way to put it.”
Minho’s wink was like a button that set off every alarm in your body. As he walked away, hand-in-hand with the love of his life, you tortured yourself watching them recede until they rounded the corner.
Unfortunately, it was common workplace etiquette to have drinks with your coworkers after hours now that your schedules had slowed down. How convenient it was that ‘DAHLIA’ was open and even more so that your coworkers were eager to go. Initially, you tried to wiggle out of going, but your close comrade Choi San wouldn’t allow it.
He slammed his veiny hand on your desk, and you jumped. “Jesus -”
“_____ _____,” he boomed, loudly announcing your government name.
“No.”
“Come on! You haven’t joined us in, like, forever!”
“Forever will continue.”
“And if I bribe you with free drinks?”
You paused typing. “I’m listening.”
“You, me, and the forty-fifth floor at ‘DAHLIA’ in ten minutes.”
“‘DAHLIA’?” you repeated. “Does it have to be that bar?”
“Mingi already called the place to reserve. Why, is it not good?”
“No, quite the opposite.”
“Then make haste, my lady!”
The whole way across the street, San had his arm around your shoulder in a tight grip, too afraid to let you slip at the slightest chance of hesitancy. The smooth skin of his forearms touched your neck and it was close enough to smell the cologne he dabbed just minutes before leaving the building, which you now realized to be on purpose.
Inside, a bunch of young corporate acolytes gathered all throughout the bar, all of whom you worked and were familiar with. Minho, though busy taking their orders, saw you and San come in. He did a double take, eyebrow twitching upwards at the arm suffocating your neck. Your lips formed the words, ‘kill me’, as San guided you forward to the line to order.
Small talk with San was never small when he easily filled you in on his latest interests and hobbies. The other women in the office who were nearby engaged with him enthusiastically. Admittedly, there were a multitude of reasons why San was popular around the office. He was intelligent, always willing to lend a helping hand, had a positive attitude even when days were long and tough, and most importantly, he was so hot that your boss had to jokingly warn him several times to tone it down. His argument was it wasn’t his fault that button-downs were tight on his back and arms.
Minho was the one to usher you forward with his index and middle fingers. 
San wrapped his arm around your shoulder again for no apparent reason. “Hello!” he greeted enthusiastically.
“Hi. _____,” he addressed to you informally.
“‘Sup, Minho,” you sighed.
“You two know each other?” San inquired. “Is that why you didn’t want to come?”
San’s only flaw was that he talked too much. Your jaw ticked. “Old friends. And no, that’s not why.”
“Oh!”
“What can I get you two?” You thought you heard ice in Minho’s voice, but you must be mistaken.
You needed something strong. “A negroni, please.”
“Double that,” San said.
Minho neither confirmed nor denied hearing the order before starting on it. Finally, you’re able to breathe easier when the weight of San’s muscly arm lets you go, confident that you wouldn’t book it out the bar. He instead turned his body to you, creating a wall and making you feel like you were under a microscope.
“Your presentation to the team yesterday was, um, amazing,” he stuttered.
Calling a weekly work presentation amazing was odd; he’s heard you lead them probably a hundred times by now. “Yeah? Thanks.”
“And the way you were able to answer all of the questions Boss Man fired at you? It’s no wonder you’re his favorite.”
“I wouldn’t say I’m his favorite.”
“Well, you’re my favorite.” As soon as those words left his lips, he pursed them together and shut his eyes. “I-I mean the team’s favorite.”
You nearly snorted, though your smile was hard to hide. “That’s… certainly an honor -”
“Two negronis,” Minho interrupted as he pushed the glasses forward.
“I got it,” San reiterated.
“Thanks. I’ll get the next one. I’ll meet you over in a bit; gonna talk to my good ol’ friend here,” you forced a grin. Like an obedient dog, San joined the others at the reserved tables.
“Wow, he’s…” Minho trailed off. “A lot.”
“Mother always said not to say mean things.”
“That was me being nice. Don’t tell me that’s your type.”
“Minho! That would be highly inappropriate workplace behavior,” you teased, though he didn’t seem amused. “Besides, what do you know about my type?”
He smirked. “I think I would know better than anyone.”
The twinge in your chest was crushing. Had Cupid returned with sturdier arrows? “Remember, things can change.”
“Did they, though?”
Why did that matter? “I’ll see you later, Minho.”
The whole night, San hovered over you like a shadow, more than he ever had before. Maybe he saw Minho as competition after your coworkers prodded for the story behind you and the hot bartender. He wouldn’t have to worry, though, as he was highly mistaken about both Minho and having interest in someone you worked with.
You would thank San in the morning for dragging you out that night because he reminded you the importance of camaraderie. It was nice to be surrounded by people who shared the same professional struggles as you and it was freeing for everyone to let their walls down. Many of your co-workers were also single and struggling, filling the bar with chatter about failed dates and competing to see who had the worst one as of late. This was the first night in a long while that you had fun, and even though the man that haunted your thoughts was less than twenty feet away, you wouldn’t let him ruin this one night out of many.
But you felt it; that burn in the back of your head like twin cigarettes had bore themselves into your skull; the piercing eyes of an onlooker who couldn’t look away from you and the buff man next to you all night. Each time you tried to catch him in the act, he had anticipated it, busying himself with a customer or peeling orange twists, and when you looked away, you’d feel it again.
Like a worm eating its way through an apple, the fire in Minho’s eyes consumed you.
‘Wya?’
On a random weeknight, Minho texted you this just as you were leaving the office. You looked around outside looking for a sniper or an inconspicuous spy but did not see anything suspicious or sensed any danger. To that, you replied with, ‘Leaving the office. Why?’
‘Don’t move.’
If you weren’t panicking before, you were now. Then, from around the alley where ‘DAHLIA’ was, Minho popped up with a tote bag on his arm and an apron slung over his shoulder. He waved and flashed his feline smile, unaware of how cryptic his texts were.
“You didn’t literally have to not move,” he teased.
“Maybe you should normalize giving context.”
“Context is: do you have dinner plans tonight?”
Your plan was to pick up grocery store sushi and binge watch TV, if you’d call that a plan. “Not really. Why?”
He gestured to his tote bag. “I was going to my test kitchen. Do you want to be my guinea pig?”
You considered saying no, but free food was involved. Plus, this is what friends would do, right? “Where’s this test kitchen of yours?”
“In my townhome. ‘Test kitchen’ just sounds cooler.”
The train ride to Minho’s place was the same distance as yours, just in the opposite direction. There wasn’t a ‘nice’ or a ‘bad’ side of the city, but you definitely wouldn’t classify this as the ‘bad’ side. Rows and rows of townhomes occupied endless streets in this neighborhood and each one had its own charm. Minho’s was right in the middle and the reddest, brickiest one on the block while the others had conformed to a more modern grey stucco-style.
The inside was anything but traditional though, with touches of modern style and technology. The first floor was similar to your loft, with an open floor plan combining the kitchen and living room meant for a true host and entertainer. The kitchen, of course, was the most updated, with a fancy six-burner stove, a magnetic display of different knives, and a giant white-granite island.
Soonie, Doongie, and Dori greeted Minho first by rubbing up against his calves and then greeted you second, unaware of the time that passed and recognizing your scent like you were only gone on a short trip.
You gasped happily, scratching their little heads and ears. “My fat ‘n furry step-children!”
“Looks like they missed you,” Minho chuckled.
“Oh, I missed you, too!” you cooed. “Can I help with any prep?”
“Can you help wash the produce?”
“Yes, chef.”
You tried not to stare too long at Minho while he tied the apron around his waist and rolled up his sleeves. There were vegetables in his tote bag you’ve never seen before, like the bulbous onion-like thing that smelled of licorice and a variation of a mushroom that looked like it would turn you into a zombie.
“Everything’s a vegetable or a fruit,” you noted.
“I’m attempting some vegetarian and vegan options outside of a salad and some dessert. If it doesn’t work out, the Thai place down the street is really good.”
Minho instructed you to cut vegetables in ways that you didn’t even know had a name to the technique. You had to tell him to talk to you like a five-year-old because you were not someone who knew what it meant to julienne a carrot or prepare the mise en place.
The first dish was a seared cabbage wedge. Cut the head into wedges; sear on the pan; make a soy-sugar-rice-vinegar saucy thing; shave a potato and toast it like a breadcrumb; retrieve the soy-and-smoke-cured egg yolk and… shave it?
“What do you mean ‘shave it’?” you muttered, holding the hardened yellow orb of congealed something in one hand and a sharp sword-like thingamabob in the other. “Isn’t it going to burst?”
Minho, bless his heart, stood behind you and guided your hands together. His hands, despite going through hundreds of washes and touching all things hot and cold, were soft and warm on top of yours. He had you shave one quarter of the solid egg yolk over the dressed cabbage wedge.
“The yolk is cured, so it’s solid all the way through,” he said.
His breath tickled the shell of your ear and it turned hot. Was the oven set to a thousand degrees? “O-Oh! Wow, that’s cool. Is it done?”
It was only then that Minho released his hold. “Yup. Try it.”
Cooking was a hidden form of sorcery. It was one of the most complex and delicious dishes you’ve ever eaten. Salty from the potato breadcrumb, savory from the egg yolk, and sweet from the soy sauce, feeling different textures and flavors so good you had to stop yourself from moaning.
“Good?” he asked. All you could do was nod vigorously with eyes wide and glittering. He smiled genuinely and his eyes sparkled, too. He opened his mouth and said, “Ah~”
That was your cue to feed him a bite. You gathered the perfect amount of everything onto a fork for him. As he chewed, his brows knitted together thoughtfully and you’re unsure of what that expression meant. From his pocket, he took out a small field notes book and scribbled something quickly.
“You don’t like it?”
He shook his head. “No, I like it a lot.”
“Why is your face like that?”
“What’s wrong with my face?”
“You look so angry.”
“That’s just how my face looks.”
Next was a vegetarian bone marrow. Nothing about bones or marrows sounded remotely vegetarian, but Minho handed you two fat king oyster mushrooms to halve and remove the centers while he sautéed a medley of other mushrooms in salted butter, garlic, and thyme. There was a comfortable silence in the kitchen as you both worked. Nothing felt awkward, or forced, or as bitter as your last meetings were.
As you waited for Minho’s further instructions, you toured the living space and observed all the pictures. You were in about half of them. Most were of your entire friend group, but many were significant moments in your lives, like graduation, birthdays, talent shows, or candid solo pictures. After all these years, when you kept any evidence of him hidden in a shoe box in your closet, he displayed you loud and proud. You glossed over the number of pictures of Karina for your own sake but seeing her face that many times made you stop looking.
When you turned back, Minho was staring at you so intently, he forgot to pretend he wasn’t watching.
“What is it?” you asked.
“Nothing,” he cleared his throat. “Um, the next step is ready.”
Under an immersive blender (“Immersion blender, silly.”) was the sautéed medley and the guts of the king oyster mushroom, softened cream cheese, and olive oil. The paste was bagged and piped back into the charred and seasoned center of the cut-out king oyster mushroom. With a flame torch, Minho darkened the paste, creating a bruleed outer layer, and topped it off with pink peppercorns, pecorino, and chives. Triangles of buttered toast were the vehicle.
Minho took a spoon and scooped out the center. “A little bit of ‘marrow’ and voila. And the ‘bone’ is edible, too, obviously.”
Your eyes teared up at the fireworks of umami. “Will you cater for my next birthday?”
“For you, I will.”
After course upon course of seared and leafy bites of savory and salty goodness, you greenlit practically all of them to Minho’s dismay (“Guinea pig means to critique, not suck up to.”). Dessert was the final leg of courses. From preserved lemon sorbets to chocolatey bites of flourless cake, you would fall into a deep sleep tonight on a cloud of spun sugar.
“I’m drunk on life,” you sighed happily.
“I like you best that way.”
“Seriously, Minho, you have something really good here. I’m no expert, but I think –”
“Wait!” he interrupted. “Chocolate on your lip.”
“Huh? Here?” you licked once.
“Not even close.”
“Here?”
“No.”
“Where’s a napkin?”
“Hold still, will you?”
Minho held your chin between his thumb and index finger and tilted up. Like a surgeon, he meticulously wiped away all evidence of your inner chocolate-devouring goblin with his other thumb. For a moment, he lowered his hand to wipe it on his apron, but he caught you looking at his lips.
“Th-Thanks,” you whispered.
He took the chocolate-covered thumb and sucked it clean, maintaining his gaze before it lowered. “My pleasure.”
The kitchen felt hot and it was hard to breathe. The alarms in your head went off again; the longer you stayed, the faster you’d fall. “I-I should go.”
“Wait –”
“This was great by the way!” you called as you backed up towards the door. “S-So good! And thank you, I will pay you back for any groceries!”
“That’s not necessary, I invited you here.”
“Let me know what you decide to add to the menu, and I’ll-I’ll stop by some time, yeah?”
You didn’t give him the opportunity to answer before running out the door.
The following weeks after your inappropriately intimate tasting, you avoided Minho as long as you could. It hadn’t even been a month since you saw him for the first time and you already crossed the thin line that was never meant to be crossed. You couldn’t even be strong for that long before you fell back into the routine of desiring the one man you weren’t allowed to have.
This was the curse of Cupid. He had successfully shot and landed an arrow into every friend you loved, pairing them up with their person and the match-up was so right it was scary. Somehow, at the perfect time under the correct circumstances, your friends found the ones that completed their other half, or so they said, and you witnessed love in full bloom every time it happened and everyday since. When it was shoved in your face like that, how could you not think about what you were missing out on every single day of your life?
You used to think considering a couple as two halves was a disservice to humanity. Halves implied that part of you was missing; it suggested that one could never be whole alone, that they spend their whole lives finding someone who fit the two-piece puzzle. A two piece puzzle was supposed to be the easiest puzzle in the world, but in a box filled with over eight billion pieces, it would take forever for Cupid to pair the pieces. At twenty-five, after that stormy night, you once believed that you could survive as one single piece among the eight billion for the rest of your life at the bottom of the pieces pile, if it came to it; but now that you’re the last of the friend group to yet find your match - at thirty, at that - maybe Cupid had a point to the whole two halves make a whole argument.
Because admittedly, as much as you tried to convince yourself on your thirtieth birthday, you didn’t feel whole. Hell, you barely felt like half; and every time you saw Minho, bits of you were being chipped off to the point that you were scared of losing your half of the puzzle.
To distract yourself from thinking about Minho licking chocolate from your lips, you finally jumped the gun and downloaded dating apps for the first time. Well, Chaeryoung and Jisung did.
“Put on your bathing suit,” she ordered.
“Excuse you.”
“What? All your selfies are so normal!”
“Normal is a good thing, Chaer.”
“But it’s not,” Jisung piped in. “Dating is not what it used to be. Before, it was as simple as looking pretty, saying your favorite song or movie, and naming the restaurant you want your first date to be at. Now, you have to get personal. Name a niche hobby, what character from a TV show represents you the most, what childhood trauma affected your frontal lobe development -”
“Ok, I get it.”
Jisung and Chaeryoung sandwiched you tightly on the couch even though the view of the tablet was easily seen. Chaeryoung filled in all the prompts for you a little too enthusiastically while Jisung was there to judge through the lens of the male gaze and snacks.
The woman beside you cackled evilly. “This is so much fun! I can’t believe you’re finally doing this. Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this moment?”
“Seriously. What man made you do this?” Jisung teased.
You yanked the tablet back. “No one.”
“Liar.”
“Who do you think, Han?” Chaeryoung stated bluntly. “Who else could have brought this blessing upon us?”
“Oh,” he mused, “duh.”
“Shut up, both of you! No one made me do this. Am I not worthy of finding love?”
“Of course you are. Just not this way.”
“Why not this way?”
“Just watch.”
The second someone completes their profile, it’s like the app forces it at the top of everyone’s algorithm. You received a lot of interest and private messages in the first five minutes, many of which were… bold…
“Men are so uncouth,” you groaned. “Is sex all you think about?”
“Yeah,” Jisung shrugged, pointing to his head and then his groin. “Two heads, two brains.”
“Ugh, gross.”
Chaeryoung swiped left at lightning speed. “Too young, too old, too short, too tall, too smart –”
“I like smart,” you pouted.
“The key to a healthy relationship is to be smarter than them.” Jisung didn’t argue, as he was happily committed to his intelligent partner (a mystery to all, as no one knew how he bagged a research fellow).
There’s a knock on your door. The three of you look at each other in confusion.
“You two need to stop secretly inviting strange men to my home,” you accused before getting up.
“I didn’t tell anyone,” Jisung defended, “did you?” Chaeryoung denied.
When you opened the door, a disheveled Minho stood there with an oily bag in his hands. He raised a brow. “Am I that strange?”
Just as you were trying to trust in the dating app algorithm, the Gods and Cupid said, ‘let there be chaos!’ “You, specifically? A little bit.”
“Ha ha,” he drawled. “Am I interrupting something?”
“Yeah!” Jisung called from the couch. “This is girl time, Min!”
“Shut up!” Chaeryoung pulled Jisung up from the couch and they both patted your head before rushing out the door. “We’ll see you later, _____!”
“Y-You don’t have to leave!” you practically begged.
“Honey, it’s past-nine on a weekday, yes we do!”
“I didn’t realize the time,” Minho frowned, looking at his watch. “I was nearby with Hyunjin and thought I’d stop by with some fries to make up for Chaeryoung tossing them out on your birthday.”
You don’t even remember that happening. “That’s so nice of you.”
“I can come back another time.”
“No!” you said an octave too high. “No, please come in!”
Minho’s outfit was more casual than ‘DAHLIA’s typical button down and tight slacks and you deduced he was working at ‘RED LIGHT’ today. There were multiple oil and/or beer stains on his shirt and his hair was parted and pointing in different directions, evidence of his hand having to go through it several dozen times out of stress.
“You look…”
“I know,” he sighed, plopping the bag on the table. “There was a work-lunch event today that turned into dinner for some corporate slugs. Then, Hyunjin was looking at a location for his coffee excursion and asked for my help. Four hours later, I’m starving and thought of you.”
He was thinking of you a lot lately, it seemed, and it was hard to deny that you reciprocated. “This is wonderful, thank you. I owe you two dinners now.”
“You don’t ‘owe’ me anything. Friends don’t owe; they treat.”
“My treat next time, then.”
“And the next,” he reminded with a smirk. “What were you girlies doing just now?”
“Um,” you hesitated, cheeks stuffed with potato. “Making me a dating profile.”
He raised a brow in the same way when he saw you walking in with San: questioning and dissatisfied. “You never had one before?”
“I was on-and-off when I first moved here, but I couldn’t stand to open the apps after a couple days of usage.”
He does the thing with his fingers when he gestures to come close. You noticed his hands were veinier now than when you were younger.
“Let me see.”
“Let you see my dating profile?” He nodded. “Absolutely not.”
“C’mon, I’ll give you an opinion through the male gaze.”
“Why do you think Jisung was here?”
“Certainly not that.”
Defeated, you handed him your phone with the app open. There’s a twinkle of curiosity wondering how he’d react, but you wanted to tame that fire quickly. He scrolled and swiped, then scrolled, and scrolled, and scrolled.
His face was stern when he said, “You already have a lot of admirers.”
“Isn’t that a good thing?”
He didn’t answer and continued to scroll. “What about that guy you work with?”
“San? What about him?”
“Nothing came of it?”
“Didn’t I tell you that would be inappropriate?”
“Is that the only reason stopping you?”
You squint your eyes at your all too curious friend who hadn’t looked up from your phone since taking it. He popped fries in his mouth rhythmically like a metronome until he caught the heat from your gaze. He looked up and did a double take.
“Hm?” he asked.
“Why are you so curious?”
“So, there’s another reason stopping you?”
“And if there is?”
“And if there is…” he repeated, fiddling with your phone charm. “Would you tell me?”
The inkling of assumption tickled annoyingly at the corners of your mind. Was he asking to let you know that he knew he was the reason for your desires? Or was he asking to tease you, to prove to you that if you had made the right decision all those years ago, you could have been in Karina’s position? That all this time you spent away from him, your journey for companionship started too late. And sure, your bank account was as filled as your stomach, but was it worth it when you had no one to share it with?
He waited patiently for your answer, but you heard his foot tapping rapidly on the wood. Your mouth opened, then closed, and you finally shook your head in shame, because your lips were cursed to speak the truth or nothing at all and you would rather deny than to admit.
He licked his lips, and that gesture alone sparked something in your core. Then he nodded in a way that expressed sourness, as if this confirmation was exactly what he expected but not what he was hoping in both the nonverbal response and the underlying tone that trailed behind it.
You broke the silence. “How’s Karina?”
“Good.” He was quick to shake his head. “Actually, I don’t know. I haven’t seen her since lunch a month ago.”
“Why’s that?”
“I’ve… been too busy.”
Shameful and embarrassed, was what you gathered from his response. As he should; to criticize your decision only to repeat the cycle when he found fulfillment in his career was so… Hypocritical was not a strong enough word. Betrayal, perhaps, was the most correct, but that didn’t satisfy you, either.
You wouldn’t get satisfaction from any angle, though. No matter how you viewed it, it was selfish to consider yourself relevant here. Minho was hurting; everything you feared about relationships had flowered before him and crushed the idea that perfection could be achieved as long as both people tried. But it seemed that although he tried, it wasn’t enough, and maybe his ideals were more out of the ordinary than he anticipated.
“It’s put a bit of a strain on our relationship. She wants to settle down and I… I thought I did, too, but… you know, my places have been growing so much, and…”
As he trailed off and off through a list of excuses, it took you all the way back to the night that it rained. You also spat excuses from your pockets and got nowhere. Now, Minho was on your side, but it didn’t feel great, either.
“What’s more important to you?” you asked.
That was the age-old dilemma, wasn’t it? What was most important to someone as an adult who spent most of their life getting educated and preparing for the professional world to milk money from consumers; the career they adored and earned or the love they found along the way? One could argue they could live without love, but could one live with themselves if they gave up their dream? How many rom-coms have you and Minho laughed at where the world that movie was set in was in a vacuum and the couple always chose each other? Though the plot was fake, the dilemma was real, and the choices they made in the movies were just not realistic.
“Important,” he chuckled, understanding what you were getting at. “Why can’t both be important to me?”
“They can, but it’s clear your efforts are imbalanced in one direction. Otherwise, we would not be having this conversation.”
The fries were long gone. Minho stood up and tossed the bag in the trash before grabbing the unfinished bottle of wine leftover from your birthday and two glasses. You supposed tonight would be the most appropriate night to finish it off. Plus, Minho needed it, apparently.
“I tried, you know,” he sighed, “I really did. I text every night; I send her flowers to her office; I cook for her, shower her with gifts, and tell her regularly that I-I…”
Minho didn’t complete his thought, but you knew what he meant to say. Why would he not, for your sake? “That you love her?”
“Yeah. That I loved her.” Your glasses raised in sync. “I get it. I’m not as present, and I get her love language is quality time, but when did the thought stop counting?”
“Have you considered you two aren’t compatible?”
“Anyone can be compatible, no? Where’s the effort?”
Now you were feeling annoyed. Were these digs subconsciously at you? “Effort can only go so far. You said her love language is quality time. You could do everything in between, but you’re not there to hold her, to kiss her, to tangle under the bed sheets as much as she wants, then guess what? She’s never going to feel the love that she wants and deserves.”
“What about me? What about what I want?”
“I don’t know what you want. Does she? Do you?”
Minho chugged the rest of the cabernet in his glass, nose wrinkling, before pouring in more with a heavy hand. You ignored how cute his nose looked. “I don’t know what I want.”
“Ok, so you can’t complain is what I’m hearing.”
A chuckle huffed through his nose, annoyed that someone who he confided in didn’t feed into his fantasy that his ideology was gospel.
“Ahh!” he groaned loudly to the ceiling. “Fucking hell. I thought this was supposed to get easier when we were older?”
“What? Love?” you scoffed. “Look at us; I’m stuck on the apps and you’re stuck in your ways. You think this gets easier just because we have more ‘life experience’?” Your air quotes were overly exaggerated. “No, dude. People are dumb at every age.”
“I’m not dumb,” he pouted.
“You’re a little dumb.”
He giggled a bit and it traveled down his belly to a full laugh. You couldn’t help but smile, too, which grew into your own fit of laughs, and the condo was filled with ugly laughs and tears of joy, pain, and all that was locked inside your’s and Minho’s souls since inception. These nights were the ones you once looked forward to.
When the giggles died down, he stared blankly at the swirling wine in the glass and asked, “Do you think we could have worked out?”
You felt your cheeks and nose flare brightly. “Worked out? Like if we tried?”
In some other tangential timeline, Minho moved to the city. Maybe he still bought out ‘RED LIGHT’, and you would visit him everyday after work and bring your coworkers in to show off your hot bartender boyfriend. Then, you’d take the train home together. You’d wind down on the couch watching a couple episodes of something light and crawl into bed in each other’s arms. Your lips would never leave his unless it was to come up for air, arms wrapped around his naked torso as he crawled on top, and mumbling praises and poems of how much you adored him.
Like an asteroid that orbits a planet, you revolve your life around him and his happiness. If you tried long distance or if you gave up your career, it would be a difficult feat, and happiness would not be found in that desert. Leaving for the city was for the best. He eventually found his oasis, and you were still on the long journey of finding yours in between the infinite dunes.
Before you realized, your nose burned some more and your vision blurred. “I think it still would have been really hard.”
“Would it have been worth it?”
“I think…” you hesitated, but the wine in your veins was overtaking, “it would only have been worth it if it was with you.”
“Then, why?” he begged. “What happened to ‘it’s better to have loved and lost’?”
“After all this time, you still can’t see what I see. I never want to risk something where I would lose you. So, I didn’t think I’d lose you if I said no.”
“This is… so stupid…”
“Don’t insult me in my home.”
“No, I… I…” he stuttered, and it’s just now you see his eyes were glossy, too. “I can’t stop thinking about you, and it’s so fucking stupid.”
It was stupid; you moved out to move on, and here he was at your door bringing you french fries and opening bars across from where you work, invading your life like a decade-old infectious disease with no ailment known to man-kind. It was stupid; he was taken, spitting out confessions of his failing love story to the one he ended, telling you he still thinks of you before he sleeps. It was very stupid, and it pained you not to fall for it.
You shook your head. “Don’t.”
“______ -”
“You can’t think of me.”
He reached out across the table to take your hands. You allowed it, because you were a weak, weak woman, starving for touch and hungry for him. His skin was rough and tired from the dehydrating soaps of the service industry, but they felt so right.
“Tell me you don’t think of me,” he demanded. “Tell me, and I’ll leave.”
“What does it mean for you to leave? You will leave my home, and then what? Will you try to be better for her? You’ll stay in my life and we can be friends? Or will you leave permanently and change the dynamic of our friend group forever for the second time?” By now, the tears were falling and words choked as they came out, but your grip on him betrayed you and you held on like he was hanging off a cliff.
“I… The… The former…”
“Then, no. No, I don’t think of you. I’m not tormented by you, I’m not in ruins when I see you, I don’t smell you on my clothes, I don’t see you when I close my eyes, or in stranger’s faces when they pass, I don’t dream of you, and I definitely don’t think of you every second of everyday!”
“You can’t even convince yourself anymore. Why won’t you be vulnerable with me?”
“Vulnerability is weakness, Minho! I have been strong for so long; without you, at that!” your voice was shrill and loud and you couldn't be bothered to sit. You were up from your chair, leaning over the table, and he winced as you kept going. “You come here, turn my life upside down, and ask me to be vulnerable? To lower my guard around you? After you abandoned me all because the circumstances weren’t right at that moment? Fuck you.”
He got up from the table to get to you and towered over you, torso much wider than you remembered. He was too close, and you could feel him feel you. Your body hadn’t turned to face him, too scared to face your biggest fear, so he forced it upon you by holding your shoulders. His eyes, so big and brown that it was easy to drown in them, dug deep into yours and pleaded with everything he had in his heart.
“Fine, don’t be vulnerable, but show yourself some mercy, for fuck’s sake.”
“Mercy? I want someone I can’t have. How does that merit mercy?”
He faltered a bit and you regretted the moment you invited him in. His eyebrows furrowed in what you thought was pity. Your head dropped in shame; that was the last thing you needed. His hands moved to hold your face as if he never wanted you to drop something so precious to him ever again.
“Don’t,” you repeated.
His forehead connected with yours and suddenly, you felt young again. It’s what you needed, what you wanted, but…
“I want to kiss you.”
The rush from five years ago hit you like a truck. “I want to kiss you, too.”
Every emotion, every desire, collided into the kiss. His hands swiftly moved to your waist and pulled you in until every millimeter of you touched some part of him and soon your hands were lost in his hair. His lips were soft, and you always imagined them to feel like petals of a tulip, but he was earnest and there was some pain in the amount of pressure he pressed into you. The pain felt good, the feeling of being wanted made your heart soar, and you two exchanged gasps and moans as your lips moved fervently, hungry for indulgence after being teased with temptation. But his tongue tasted sour, and bitter, and nothing like the coffee and chocolate you once dreamed of, because this circumstance was yet again not right. He tasted like rotting fruit because stolen fruit was never sweet.
You broke away, gasping and sniffling and it was so hard to breathe. “You’re not mine,” you cried.
“But you have always been mine,” he whispered, with his breath ghosting your lips.
You shook your head, over and over until you freed yourself from his grip, wishing you’d be free of him forever. You turned your back to him, unable to show your face as you said, “I think you should leave.”
Back then, you wished he fought for you as much as he wished you to do the same. You wished he’d followed you, or waited for you until the time was right, but of course time didn’t wait for anyone. Deep down, as you broke into pieces in your dining room, you hoped he’d fight for you then, too, and proclaim that his heart belonged to only you. You were fooled twice, and as the saying goes, shame on you.
The failure of reciprocity would weigh you down just as much. You never fought for him the way you wished he would for you for the simple fact that you weren’t allowed to. He was a taken man, a man who said not too long ago how he told her he loved her every single night, and it would destroy you how he’d go home later and still say those words.
You believed everyone was worthy of love, including you. The love you wanted wasn’t supposed to feel tainted or spoiled. No matter how much you wanted him, how much he claimed he wanted you from the very start, you wouldn’t be that kind of woman who stole someone’s man, and therefore you would not confess to anything else that lay hidden away in your heart.
Minho left quietly. The battle was over, and you broke down on the floor.
Heavy and loud sobs escaped your quivering lips in a poor attempt to dissipate the pain that expanded in your chest. Your cries echoed into the open loft until you couldn’t stand the sound of your voice and wasting tissues, but your body wouldn’t let up. So, you transferred yourself to the bathroom, running a hot shower and curling up on the tile until the water ran cold. Here, your cries were muffled by the artificial rain, just as you had cried into the storm that ugly night long ago.
You called in sick the following day.
For the next quarter, you were happy you were swamped with work, for once. That meant waking up early, taking the train when the sun had barely risen, and leaving when it had long gone to sleep. It was the same for most people in the office and you were blessed with not having to conjure up a lie to get away from San’s advances to get you to happy hour.
In sum, you hoped it meant you’d be too busy to think of him, but when you had only a single moment, a single second of freedom, he invaded every bit of you. He was a virus, a parasite, sucking the life out of you like he was reminding you what you desired that once was within arms reach was now lost forever. Like Icarus, you fell from the ether into despair, surrounded by darkness from the absence of the sun in your only moments outside of the office. On days when you were off, you had begged your boss to let you come in, to distract you with some enrichment of any stupid task even if it meant gluing together inadvertently shredded proprietary documents for sixteen hours, but HR would catch on too quickly, was what he said.
You hoped to fall hopelessly in this troposphere of purgatory forever, operating through the days on autopilot, but your heart had sunk to your gut and it ached to land on the earth to end the pain. Just as you were getting the hang of flowing with the wind, Minho called once. Then, he called twice. On the third, you almost answered, but when your eyes welled and you struggled to breathe, you figured it was your body’s reaction to falling faster and further beneath the clouds. You spent those nights he called curled up in some corner of your home under a multitude of blankets waiting for the headache and heartache to subside, but by then the night turned to dawn and time was limited.
Chaeryoung would call, too; she’d text; she’d send you food, coffee, and chocolates, and much of it went cold because any sight of food made you nauseous. Lately, you moved so slow that sustenance wasn’t a necessity anymore, nor was it a pleasure. She was always quite the worrywart, so you tried to answer as much and as vaguely as you could, but at one point it was too exhausting to keep up the lie and you gave up, leaving her with one-worded answers that didn’t satisfy either party.
And so you continued to fall; continued to cry, rot, and falter when all you had done was taste forbidden fruit.
His birthday approached faster than you could get over him.
For a while, no one seemed to mind your absence besides Chaeryoung and Minho, who had called to see if you were attending any of the last-minute get-togethers or planned reservations in the recent month. The one big one you regretted missing was Chan’s birthday, who was rightfully miffed, but you hoped the gift you shipped would make up for it. You kept up with social media, though, and liked all the pictures that came from those nights. 
Each post, you’d look for him. You’d admire what he was wearing; you’d wonder what cologne he was wearing; you’d imagine the way his eyes lit up when Karina walked in the room. But she wasn’t in any of the photos.
You didn’t tell anyone what transpired the second time with Minho. It was too embarrassing to have fallen for him twice, which sent feminism back at least a decade. You were going to conjure up some work-related lie to get out of his birthday celebration, but Chaeryoung wouldn’t allow it and even went as far as messaging San for confirmation about your work schedule.
In a huff, she busted through to your home before you could reject her kindness. Normally, your girl was all smiles and full of expressions, but tonight she was strict and stern, which meant she was mad. Very mad.
“I need you to not message my coworkers, please,” you said as she filtered through your closet. “I don’t want a meeting with HR on Monday.”
She didn’t turn to face you when she snapped, “It felt like you were lying, so I had to double check.”
“I wasn’t lying. It was busy, but we just lightened up after the deadline yesterday.”
“So, why couldn’t you tell me that?”
“I needed an excuse to not go tonight.”
She shook her head, clearly frustrated with how insufferable you were being. She turned to you with glossy eyes and you regretted avoiding her lately. “Aren’t I your friend?”
Her having to ask really stung. “You’re my best friend.”
“Then can’t you tell me why you disappeared for three months?”
“I… it’s hard, Chaer…”
“For God’s sake, _____, you’re thirty. Act like it, and use your words!”
“I can’t,” your voice cracked, “I can’t see Minho.”
Her face softened, realizing maybe that night when she left you with someone you saw as a stranger was not what a best friend did. You watched her scan through your slumped posture and sunken eyes before she lunged and hugged you tightly. Tears burned, the feeling of gentle humanity fulfilling your highest hierarchy of needs overflowing all your emotions.
“What happened?” she whispered.
“We kissed,” you whispered back.
“And?”
“I kissed back.”
“But?”
“He’s not mine.”
She pushed you to arms length, eyes knitting sternly. “I think you should go tonight.”
“Chaer -”
“Trust me. You might regret it. It’s his thirtieth, after all.” She pushed away the hairs that cling to your forehead before running to grab some make up. “Let me do your make-up! It’ll be like your twenty-first all over again.”
She sat you down on your bed and began to dab away at the color-correcting pallet. A box of tissues lay next to her so she could catch the tears before they fell. She created a large pile in the end.
“Do you want him to be yours?” she asked after a long moment of silence.
You wanted to smell him on your clothes, adore him in your dreams, and wake up next to him. You want him to be yours, only yours, and to not have to share him with someone who he also chose. Under this sanguine circumstance, still, you smiled at this very thought, because of course the answer was, “Yes.”
And she, too smiled, her own tears forming while she dabbed yours with another fist full of tissues. “Then, go to him.”
“But -”
“_____,” she breathed sternly, sniffling a bit. “You stupid, stupid people-pleaser. Fight for yourself, for once.”
When you thought the battle was long over, little did you know you were still fighting all this time.
Despite trying not to think of him, as his birthday approached, the calendar terrorized you to get him a gift. Just in case, you know? It was a fancy Nakiri knife whose steel was decorated in waves. The Internet told you that a chef’s knife was similar to that of a samurai’s sword, so only the highest quality of Damascus steel was preferred. As you held the box in your hand at his front steps, your mind and heart kept battling with each other and debated whether or not getting a personal gift was too intimate versus a gift card to some generic restaurant to establish a boundary.
But wasn’t the boundary already too blurry, anyways?
Chaeryoung pushed you inside the already-unlocked door. All the boys and their partners and Chaeryoung’s now-official real man were already there surrounding the island. Minho, who just had a grin on, dropped it quickly upon seeing you come in and straightened his back. It’s like deja vu from your birthday.
Karina wasn't present.
Your body’s instinct was to turn and run out the door, but Chaeryoung anticipated your every move and was quick to block you. She squeezed your hand and tugged you further inside. You greeted the boys and their partners first, who all said a variation of, ‘long time, no see,’ before reaching Minho. His expression was still starstruck and confused. He didn’t appear angry. Perhaps it was a feeling worse than that, which could not be translated through his face.
With sweaty hands, you handed him the small rectangular box. “Happy birthday.”
He was hesitant to take it, as if to question the possibility of diffusion of poison through the skin. His hesitancy allowed you to get a whiff of his bourbon vanilla cologne. “Thank you.”
“Oh, so you’ll come for Minho’s birthday, but not mine?” Chan pouted.
“Some things are worth coming out for,” you retorted.
The night went on and you played your role as an onlooker in the background, hoping to blend in with the walls and remain unnoticed so as to not ruin the night. You watched him and the boys shove each other playfully and inhale any and all food Minho made. Who’s to say that thirty was old when the epitome of youth was in the souls of a group of hungry boys? Conversations and debates picked up from when they last saw each other. Some of them filled you in and others forced you to answer without knowing the majority opinion. Laughs and giggles filled the kitchen and even when it seemed that Minho didn’t want to whenever you answered, he couldn’t help himself from smiling at your ridiculous answers, though he stopped when he’d catch you watching him.
As the clock ticked forward, your anticipation for Karina to pop in at any moment dwindled. Maybe she was also having a rough quarter three and taking a late night at the office, but to miss her boyfriend’s thirtieth was… a choice, even if they were fighting or some other strange reason. But then four hours turned to six hours and then it was, ‘damn, it’s already 2:00 AM?’ and she never came.
“Are you ready to go?” Chaeryoung asked at the front door.
Minho was now alone in the kitchen and there were a lot of dishes left to wash. You should help him.
“No,” you said. “I’ll call you later.”
She had a hard time hiding her grin as she left.
You approached him slowly like how you’d approach an angry cat because he was scrubbing the dishes a little too furiously. He didn’t look up despite knowing what you were up to.
“Can I help?” you asked.
Still, he refused to look at you, but he handed you the sponge. Well, that was progress, right?
Dishes and clean up were completed in silence. No chit-chat, no music, just the sound of running water and dishes clinking in the cupboards. The task was finished in good time, and just before you decided that your stay was long overdue, he pulled another deja vu card.
“What are you doing here?” he mumbled to the floor.
“It’s your thirtieth birthday. Chaeryoung told me to come.”
“You could’ve said no.”
“I could’ve.”
A salty laugh - or perhaps a scoff - was uttered. He was tired, you were tired, and the air was cold and stale. The topics orbited like a satellite, coming ‘round for another turn for a different thirtieth celebration, if either of you would even call it that.
Minho let out a big sigh. “Only you can disappear for three months and come back into open arms.”
The words arranged sounded like a compliment, but it was clearly the opposite. “I don’t expect to be forgiven.”
“No, you shouldn’t. I tried calling you.”
“I know.”
“Texting. E-mailing. Fuck, even snail mailing!”
“I know…”
He threw his hands in the air, as he did whenever he was frustrated, and turned to take a breather from your nonchalance. You were supposed to be fighting for him, not letting him slip away like this, but why was this so hard when loving him came easily?
“I shouldn’t have come over that night,” he said after returning. “I was trying too hard to be friends again and I crossed a point where I couldn’t return from.”
“Isn’t that the story of our friendship?”
“Is that how you feel?”
“We were never really just friends, were we?” you teased.
“No,” he admitted softly, “we never were.”
Your eyes met for the first time that night. His were red and puffy, and he looked like he hadn’t slept in three months.
You swallowed the rock in your throat. “Where’s Karina?”
“I don’t know. I broke up with her a while ago.”
Your chest felt tight and your voice bubbled out a garbled, “Why?”
And his mirrored, to the point where he had to clear his throat. “I don’t love her anymore.”
“So, is it true? Is it better to have loved and lost?”
“I wouldn’t exchange my days with her for anything.”
It didn’t make sense; it just didn’t. When someone loved that deeply, how could they throw that person away so easily?
“I’m sorry,” was all you could say.
“I’m not.” He cleared his throat. “I loved her and she loved me. It was fulfilling, and now it’s not. It’s just how it is.”
“Isn’t that painful?”
“If it means I get to feel like I’m flying, I think I can handle it.”
The concept, the idea of that, was just too hard to grasp. It took your wax wings melting to realize that the journey upwards was worth the descent.
“Enough about my failures,” he said hoarsely, “What about you? How… how are you doing?”
How were you supposed to admit that tonight was the first night you had a proper meal? That sleep only came under the influence of some generic-brand silver liquor? That you plucked a fist full of grey hairs the day before? Would admitting to vulnerability prove that you were fighting for this? For him? Or would it make you look pathetic?
“I’ve been doing fine.”
The centers of his brows scrunched together and his lips pursed. He inhaled heavily, his sniffles echoing through his quiet home.
“Are you?” he stuttered, voice distorted and desperate. “Really?”
No, of course not, and that much was clear when you started to cry.
“Because,” he continued, “if you can’t tell, I’m… dying on the inside.”
“Because of me?” you whispered, feeling the weight of your actions collapsing.
“Because of you. It’s always because of you. Everyday for the past ten years. It’s always been you.”
“Why couldn’t you forget me? Why? When you were the one to throw me away?”
“How!” he cried out. “How could I forget about you, when all I wanted was you?”
“You wanted to change me! You wanted me to abandon my career.” “I wanted you to try!”
“And you were right!” Sobs choked in your chest. “You were right. If I loved you, I should have fought for you. I should have tried harder. And I really shouldn’t have admitted those feelings to you when you were not mine. For everything that I’ve done, I’m so, so sorry.”
“You should be. You are so mean,” he hissed, pointing harshly. “You torture me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Even when I close my eyes, I see you.”
“I’m sorry -”
“I named my fucking bar after your favorite flower! And now you stand here in my home asking me to forget about you? How am I supposed to even begin doing that, hm? How, when everything around me reminds me of you?”
Your sobs were visceral and messy, and you buried your face in your hands. Maybe tears held the youth Ponce de Leon searched his whole life for the way yours could fill the fountain in minutes and how wiping them took away two decades of your life.
“I’m going to ask you once more,” he whispered. “One last time, and I’ll leave it be forever because I’m fucking tired. Do you think of me as often as I think of you?”
You caved in when all else went wrong and there was nothing else to hide. “Everyday.”
“Do you want me as much as I want you?”
“No,” you replied, “Because I need you. Now, let me ask you: do you want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you?”
His lips quivered before he laughed and you do, too, because that was the cringiest thing you’ve ever said. He held your face, that precious face of yours that he adored so much, dabbing away your tears. His eyes fluttered to your lips, a habit he couldn’t shake off after all these years.
“I need you to kiss me,” he demanded.
He tasted like honey and his lips fit yours like the second half of a two-piece puzzle. This was slow and deliberate, no longer going at the crushing speed of fervent passion because you had all the time in the world together now, and Minho was always the type of man to take his time. You couldn’t stand to leave his lips even for air and they ghosted his only for a few seconds before you tip-toed and pressed yourself deeper against him. Your hands were occupied with gripping his shirt at his waist to keep him in place. When you felt his smile on your lips, you grinned back and held him by his beautiful face.
“I need you to stay,” he formed on your lips.
“All I need is you,” you answered.
Even while traveling to his bedroom, both of you refused to separate as you bumped into furniture.
“We should take this slow,” he mumbled, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.
“Get acquainted with each other, or whatever,” you concurred after removing his belt.
“Maybe get coffee some time?” he asked into the crook of your neck.
“Or a drink? I know this really cute bar called ‘DAHLIA’.”
He threw you onto his bed. After removing his shirt, he crawled on top. “I think I’ve heard it.”
“Oh yeah?” You undid his pants zipper. “I know the bartender. A little narcissistic, though; he thinks he’s so hot.”
He trailed kisses down your lips, to your neck, to your sternum, to your stomach, until the top of your panties where his fingers hooked. “I know he is.”
You called Chaeryoung the next afternoon. At first, she scolded you for not texting her when you got home, but when she checked your location during the call, she screamed so loud that Minho dropped the spatula while making your breakfast.
The sanguine satellite would continue to orbit her world and revolve her life around his happiness; and he would continue to do the same.
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r4vn · 3 months
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–LATE BLOSSOM
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farleıgh x reader 【1/3】
w.c: 2,183
disclaimers: sensual tension, dilf!farleigh, secretary!reader, beginning of the good stuff be patient please!, oliver is a good person (*gasp*), companyAU!, cutesy, intro, pls dont bored im cooking guys *_*
—synopsis: you went to work expecting a normal day, when suddenly your boss tells you that you have been moved under new management in a new building. you now work right under the man who owns the company, and nearly a year in, he is still full of surprises.
a/n: hello! i was inspired by @girlboybug to write a fic on dilf!farleigh. this is the beginning but i hope you stay with me till the end! please be patient with me my summer has been (fortunately) real busy! ty so much for the support!
– part ²: here.
「divider by @/ cafekitsune」
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you sort of always considered that you got a late start in life. never in academics and such, but in adulthood. you had your first kiss way later than everyone else, at 18. you got your driver license late at 20, due to your fear of driving, and you got your first flat around 22 years of age. you were now 26 and living a very, well, uneventful life. you worked at a real estate corporation for the last 3 years of your life. you worked, sometimes went to the gym afterwards, and went home.
everyone you knew were beginning their lives, getting married, having kids, or simply just moving in with their significant others. you lived in a shared apartment, with no kids, and certainly no lover. your last known boyfriend was back when you were 20. the guy was a major narcissist, who nearly liked to kiss himself in the mirror and never really treated you well. it lasted for about 6 months before you were done with him.
you would occasionally go out with your roommate, oliver. whenever the two of you had the evening off. oliver is relatively a nice guy, who had a small wild side. whenever the two of you would go out he would always outdrink you and you never could catch up with his tolerance. you loved challenging him even if you could never beat him. other than hanging out with oliver, work was practically your life.
who you worked for, was a little more interesting. about six months ago, you switched buildings under different management. it was rather very abrupt in the day. you walked into your job and sat down at your desk outside your boss's room before your then boss asked you why you were here. you were confused, before she explained that you were moved under a different building and why. that morning you quickly drove to your new workplace and practically ran through the cubicles. you finally made it to the elevator and press floor 60, the top floor, and ran down the hall in your black mary janes and short pencil skirt.
you cursed to yourself for wearing such a skirt on this day. why did this have to happen to you of all people? a sudden job switch was not on the list this morning. you finally arrived at office room 636 quickly checked the time. you were exactly 5 minutes early.
oh thank god. i can breathe..
you began to slow your breathing. suddenly, you noticed how this particular office door was auburn brown instead of black like all the other doors. your brows narrowed before finding the nameplate on the door.
" farleigh start
saltburn estates, CEO "
you gulped, darting your head to each end of the ironically empty hallway. you've only worked under general managers and supervisors, never a CEO. why were you even hired for this job? your hand grabbed the door and you pushed it open, knocking simultaneously. you wore a mostly confident smile as you finally faced your new boss.
"good morning, sir." you greeted. the male brunette looked up from his laptop and his brows immediately furrowed.
"who're you?" he asked, clearly perplexed.
"i'm– [y/n, l/n] ..your new secretary. i uh ..i was moved from a different building to fill your last one's spot after she left." you explained. farleigh subtly looked you up and down that morning before smiling gently at you.
"well hello [y/n], wonderful to meet you." your cheeks warmed, nodding at him. he seemed charming for sure.
"same to you." you looked down at your shoes, smiling to yourself. you thought he was pretty, gorgeous even. his curls were tight and defined. he had shiniest brown eyes with the longest lashes and god, his cheekbones fit him so well. the lined-up scruffiness that occupied his jaw and chin made him more intimidating. not in a bad way, but more of a mysterious and intriguing one. he wore his black on black suit very well. you dont think you've seen a more handsome man in your life.
"you like croissants?" he suddenly asked. you were taken back at the sudden random question but immediately nodded. he snapped, and pointed a finger gun at you, smiling.
"fantastic, can you grab us some croissants from the cafe block down? doesn't matter what kind you get. use the company card." you nodded and shuffled your way to the door to exit his office. you couldn't help but smile, getting a feeling that this job may be more eventful than your last.
fast forward 9 months, life ironically got just a little brighter after switching job positions. working for farleigh was the same work, essentially but somehow it felt different. you were looking forward to working nearly every shift now. farleigh's various food requests left you on the craziest goose chases around the city. from getting thai food on the west side of london to vietnamese or very specific macarons on the east.
what made these adventures more fun was due to farleigh texting you throughout your walks or drives through the city. he wanted your number to make sure you updated him on your way there, and for your safety. you never texted him outside of work, you were too afraid he would turn you down in a way, and that would be super embarrassing.
"and so you saw two pigeons break dancing on the sidewalk?" farleigh asked with a grin. you laughed, nodding in response to his question. you placed the 16-count box of assorted macarons on mr.start's desk, smiling.
"well, they sure were not playing rock-paper-scissors. so i went with the realistic decision that they were break-dancing." you grinned. a chuckle slipped past farleighs lips, causing your chest to feel warmer.
"right, [y/n]. because pigeons fighting wasn't another good answer." the brunette playfully deadpanned before laughing one last time. he eagerly opened the box of fresh macarons, grabbing a coffee flavored one. he took a bite and immediately closed his eyes in contentment. you made a mental note he always saved most of the coffee macarons for last. whether it be 2 or 6 in the 16-count, he made sure he ate one first and another last.
"talk to me about today, [y/n]." farleigh mentions. you snap out of your mental folder on your boss and open your laptop up for today's schedule.
"you have a 10:30am call with finance, a 12:00pm call with crisis management, a 2:00pm meeting with advertisement, and a 4:00pm team meeting with floor supervisors." farleigh grabs another macaron, raspberry flavored while listening.
"hmm ..let's reschedule my 2:00pm with the advertisement team tomorrow, that way i won't be completely bored with my one meeting tomorrow with janet." he suggested. janet was the chief operating officer, the COO.
"yes sir." you nod and began rescheduling the preferred meeting. he thanked you, eating the rest of the macaron in his hand. your eyes then glanced over, watching as his thumb wiped the corner of his mouth. he licked his lips, causing you to immediately look away. you felt a little flustered in the face, because anything that man did was attractive to you.
"i think for the brunch meeting on friday i move it to monday ..and ...so i can.." you vaguely listened to farleigh ramble. your boss always rambled out of anxiousness yet he did everything so calmly and smoothly. how he did it was so attractive to you. he wasn't a boy with a high position, but a man with a well-deserving job. the way he carried himself simply lured you in. you blinked away your thoughts of your boss and cleared your throat.
"siiir," you start with a singy-songy tone. "you have 10 minutes to speak to finance. floor 59." you add, chuckling as farleigh caught himself rambling. he pursed his lips together trying to both shut up and not smile. he held up his index finger to signal you to give him a a moment and then rigorously typed away at his computer. a moment passed, and the tall male slowly began standing up out of his chair as he typed.
"sir.." you press on, giggling. he playfully hushed you, finally stopped typing and closed the laptop. farleigh grabbed his blazer off the back of his chair to exit.
being mr.start's secretary has allowed you to learn to relax at work. maybe it's because you never knew the word around your last job, but farleigh would catch you stressing out before telling you to take a breather. he wasn't the most extroverted person you knew but the minimal talking you two did, you cherished. you recapped your day in your mind every evening before bed. if you didn't know any better, you'd say he was your work crush. but of course, you'd never admit that even to yourself. the two of you walk out the office together, side by side.
°°°
it was early evening and many employees were wrapping up their shift. it was a rather smooth day of talking business and building contracts.
"its getting late in the day, you sure you want to stay until i leave?" farleigh questioned, groaning as he sat back down in his own personal office chair. he was drained from speaking to several people today, but glad he could enjoy another few macarons now.
"why not? i don't have anything better to do." you shrugged and laughed sheepishly. farleigh had raised a brow, eating a vanilla macaron.
"you don't go out?" you open your mouth to answer farleighs question and close it, thinking of a way to explain your social status. there was nothing to fully elaborate on really but you really didn't want to look like a loner to mr.start.
"well," you began. "i go out with my roommate occasionally, but other than that my schedule consists of work, the gym, and home." farleigh hums in response. he grabbed another coffee macaron and held it up towards you, offering it. you got up and happily accepted the sweet pastry from the mams slender digits.
"i understand, i'd like to say i'm the same way. but this weekend i am going to a business event. it's not the greece or new zealand but atleast im out of this damned building." the two of you share a laugh at his words. his phone digs, and his brown eyes divert to the notification appearing on his phone.
"oh nonono.." you hear your boss mumble, making you perk up.
"whats wrong, sir?" you ask. he sighed loudly and flipped his phone over, rubbing his scruffy jaw with his hand.
"i uh– my babysitter just canceled on me the day of the business event." babysitter? you tilt your head, trying to keep your shock suppressed but slowly fail.
"you have a child?" you ask, clearly bewildered while farleigh looked up at you chuckling. his pearly whites nearly mesmerized you.
"yes, [y/n] i have a child. a son." you swallow thickly at his words. your mind couldn't help but wander. how have you worked for the ceo of one of england's biggest real estate companies for nearly a year now and never knew he had a son?
"i didn't know that. what's his name if i may ask?" you continued. you didn't want to pry, but this was the type of news that needed questions to be asked. it made you wonder if farleigh was married now.
"his name benjamin. i didn't expect you to know that i have a son. i keep my personal life very separate from work. behind the scenes as such." farleigh explains, picking up his phone to respond to the text.
"and your babysitter just canceled?" you repeat, trying to quickly piece together an image of farleigh with a miniature version of him.
"yes, unfortunately. it's so last minute considering it is thursday and the event is saturday." farleigh sets his phone back down and opens just computer again, sighing. a mildly comfortable silence laid over the room, yet you were still tense. your mind gears kept generating the same idea and you kept silently denying it until–
"i could babysit for you." you blurted out. farleighs fingers stopped typing at the keys and he looked your way. he raised a brow with inquisitiveness, scanning your face to see if you were serious. you were.
"you, would babysit my son?" he asks. you cleared your throat awkwardly, nodding.
"w-why not? i mean– i am your secretary, the closest person to you in his building." farleigh tried his damndest to keep his smile to a minimum as he gazed at you and you watched at the corners of his lips twitched. "be at my place at 1:30pm. i'll send my address the morning of."
you finally smiled, nodding before going back to your work on your laptop till the end of your shift. admittedly, you were excited to meet benjamin, and a little more excited to see mr.start's home.
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© r4vn ²⁰²⁴, do not repost my work
stay tuned! ♡
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soon-palestine · 3 months
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Who Is the Egyptian Tycoon Accused of Charging Palestinians to Escape Gaza?
Ibrahim al-Organi has close connections with the Egyptian government, diplomats say, and he has multiple business interests in Gaza.
By Vivian Yee, Emad Mekay and Adam Rasgon Vivian Yee and Emad Mekay reported from Cairo, and Adam Rasgon from Jerusalem.
June 20, 2024, 5:49 a.m. ET
He is an Egyptian mogul who is little known outside the region.
The tycoon, Ibrahim al-Organi, chairman of Organi Group, oversees a vast network of companies involved in construction, real estate and security. He maintains close connections to top Egyptian officials, three people who have tracked the relationship and who spoke on condition of anonymity to protect their work in the region.
But it is Hala — a company that Organi Group has listed as one of its own — that has drawn the most scrutiny.
Hala has emerged as a lifeline for Palestinians who are trying to escape war-torn Gaza but has also been accused of squeezing desperate people with exorbitant fees.
In an interview this month, Mr. Organi spoke at length and in detail about Hala’s activities, though he said that his role in the company was limited and that he was just one of many shareholders.
Officials at Hala did not respond to questions sent by email.
What is Hala?
Hala had long been listed on Organi Group’s website as one of the conglomerate’s companies, but the reference appeared to have been removed recently.
Organi Group did not respond to a request for comment about why it had removed Hala from the website. Organi Group has at least eight businesses. The company lists Mr. Organi as its chairman and his son, Essameldin Organi, as the chief executive.
The older Mr. Organi, according to the company’s website, has built “a diverse business empire acting as an inseparable backbone to the Egyptian economy in countless fields.”
In the interview in his office in Cairo, Mr. Organi described Hala as a tourism company, “just like any company that exists at an airport.”
It was set up in 2017, he said, to provide V.I.P. services to Palestinian travelers who wanted an upgraded experience crossing through Rafah, the southernmost city in Gaza. At the Rafah border crossing between Egypt and the Gaza Strip in February.
Mohamed Abd El Ghany/Reuters According to people who paid for its services during the war, Hala has charged most Gazans older than 16 years $5,000, and most of those younger than 16 half that, $2,500, to coordinate their exits. They also said V.I.P. service was missing. Mr. Organi says Hala charges $2,500 per adult — and nothing for children.
What are the mogul’s ties to Gaza?
Mr. Organi was born in 1974 in the Egyptian border town of Sheikh Zuweid near Gaza.
He says he is merely a shareholder or partner in any companies with business relating to Gaza. But in the interview, he said his companies played a key role in the reconstruction in Gaza, including the removal of rubble, after a previous round of war between Israel and Hamas in 2021. Sign up for the Israel-Hamas War Briefing. 
His Instagram account features several videos that show earth-moving equipment clearing destroyed buildings in Gaza City in 2021. Text below many videos note that the work was being carried out based on the “instructions from President Abdel Fattah el-Sisi.”
Mr. Organi also leases trucks to aid groups transporting supplies into the territory and procures some of those same supplies. Weeks after the Oct. 7 Hamas-led attack in Israel that led to the war, Mr. Organi appeared at the border between Egypt and Gaza and pledged to support Palestinians in Gaza. “We won’t hesitate,” he said in remarks broadcast by the Egyptian news media. “They are our brothers.” Mr. Organi also says he is in talks about potentially participating in Gaza’s reconstruction after the war.
How is he linked to the Egyptian government?
Mr. Organi has maintained close relationships with members of the Egyptian government, using his influence to advance his business interests, according to two diplomats familiar with the matter. He was already a well-known businessman in Sinai when he rose to prominence in the 2010s after he partnered with the Egyptian military to fight militants in the peninsula who claimed affiliation with the Islamic State.
Trucks waiting near the Rafah border crossing in Egypt last month.
In the interview, Mr. Organi said he had led the Sinai Tribes’ Union, a statebacked group that helped to fight the militants in the peninsula.“God helped us gather the tribes again under the banner of the Union and put me as the head,” he said. “We decided to help the government wipe out terror groups completely.”
In 2022, Mr. el-Sisi appointed Mr. Organi as one of two nongovernment members on the Sinai Development Authority, which is responsible for development initiatives in the peninsula.
Mr. Organi recently announced that he, along with other tribal figures, would build a city named for Mr. elSisi in Sinai. He said that did not mean he had a special relationship with the president, and that others were involved. “We are known for strongly supporting President Sisi and we love him,” Mr. Organi said, “but it’s not that we are the only ones.”
Vivian Yee is a Times reporter covering North Africa and the broader Middle East. She is based in Cairo.
Yee Adam Rasgon is a reporter for The Times in Jerusalem, covering Israeli and Palestinian affairs.
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Wall Street Journal goes to bat for the vultures who want to steal your house
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Tonight (June 5) at 7:15PM, I’m in London at the British Library with my novel Red Team Blues, hosted by Baroness Martha Lane Fox.
Tomorrow (June 6), I’m on a Rightscon panel about interoperability.
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The tacit social contract between the Wall Street Journal and its readers is this: the editorial page is for ideology, and the news section is for reality. Money talks and bullshit walks — and reality’s well-known anticapitalist bias means that hewing too closely to ideology will make you broke, and thus unable to push your ideology.
That’s why the editorial page will rail against “printing money” while the news section will confine itself to asking which kinds of federal spending competes with the private sector (creating a bidding war that drives up prices) and which kinds are not. If you want frothing takes about how covid relief checks will create “debt for our grandchildren,” seek it on the editorial page. For sober recognition that giving small amounts of money to working people will simply go to reducing consumer and student debt, look to the news.
But WSJ reporters haven’t had their corpus colossi severed: the brain-lobe that understands economic reality crosstalks with the lobe that worship the idea of a class hierarchy with capital on top and workers tugging their forelacks. When that happens, the coverage gets weird.
Take this weekend’s massive feature on “zombie mortgages,” long-written-off second mortgages that have been bought by pennies for vultures who are now trying to call them in:
https://www.wsj.com/articles/zombie-mortgages-could-force-some-homeowners-into-foreclosure-e615ab2a
These second mortgages — often in the form of home equity lines of credit (HELOCs) — date back to the subprime bubble of the early 2000s. As housing prices spiked to obscene levels and banks figured out how to issue risky mortgages and sell them off to suckers, everyday people were encouraged — and often tricked — into borrowing heavily against their houses, on complicated terms that could see their payments skyrocket down the road.
Once the bubble popped in 2008, the value of these houses crashed, and the mortgages fell “underwater” — meaning that market value of the homes was less than the amount outstanding on the mortgage. This triggered the foreclosure crisis, where banks that had received billions in public money forced their borrowers out of their homes. This was official policy: Obama’s Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner boasted that forcing Americans out of their homes would “foam the runways” for the banks and give them a soft landing;
https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/06/personnel-are-policy/#janice-eberly
With so many homes underwater on their first mortgages, the holders of those second mortgages wrote them off. They had bought high-risk, high reward debt, the kind whose claims come after the other creditors have been paid off. As prices collapsed, it became clear that there wouldn’t be anything left over after those higher-priority loans were paid off.
The lenders (or the bag-holders the lenders sold the loans to) gave up. They stopped sending borrowers notices, stopped trying to collect. That’s the way markets work, after all — win some, lose some.
But then something funny happened: private equity firms, flush with cash from an increasingly wealthy caste of one percenters, went on a buying spree, snapping up every home they could lay hands on, becoming America’s foremost slumlords, presiding over an inventory of badly maintained homes whose tenants are drowned in junk fees before being evicted:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/02/08/wall-street-landlords/#the-new-slumlords
This drove a new real estate bubble, as PE companies engaged in bidding wars, confident that they could recoup high one-time payments by charging working people half their incomes in rent on homes they rented by the room. The “recovery” of real estate property brought those second mortgages back from the dead, creating the “zombie mortgages” the WSJ writes about.
These zombie mortgages were then sold at pennies on the dollar to vulture capitalists — finance firms who make a bet that they can convince the debtors to cough up on these old debts. This “distressed debt investing” is a scam that will be familiar to anyone who spends any time watching “finance influencers” — like forex trading and real estate flipping, it’s a favorite get-rich-quick scheme peddled to desperate people seeking “passive income.”
Like all get-rich-quick schemes, distressed debt investing is too good to be true. These ancient debts are generally past the statute of limitations and have been zeroed out by law. Even “good” debts generally lack any kind of paper-trail, having been traded from one aspiring arm-breaker to another so many times that the receipts are long gone.
Ultimately, distressed debt “investing” is a form of fraud, in which the “investor” has to master a social engineering patter in which they convince the putative debtor to pay debts they don’t actually owe, either by shading the truth or lying outright, generally salted with threats of civil and criminal penalties for a failure to pay.
That certainly goes for zombie mortgages. Writing about the WSJ’s coverage on Naked Capitalism, Yves Smith reminds readers not to “pay these extortionists a dime” without consulting a lawyer or a nonprofit debt counsellor, because any payment “vitiates” (revives) an otherwise dead loan:
https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2023/06/wall-street-journal-aids-vulture-investors-threatening-second-mortgage-borrowers-with-foreclosure-on-nearly-always-legally-unenforceable-debt.html
But the WSJ’s 35-paragraph story somehow finds little room to advise readers on how to handle these shakedowns. Instead, it lionizes the arm-breakers who are chasing these debts as “investors…[who] make mortgage lending work.” The Journal even repeats — without commentary — the that these so-called investors’ “goal is to positively impact homeowners’ lives by helping them resolve past debt.”
This is where the Journal’s ideology bleeds off the editorial page into the news section. There is no credible theory that says that mortgage markets are improved by safeguarding the rights of vulture capitalists who buy old, forgotten second mortgages off reckless lenders who wrote them off a decade ago.
Doubtless there’s some version of the Hayek Mind-Virus that says that upholding the claims of lenders — even after those claims have been forgotten, revived and sold off — will give “capital allocators” the “confidence” they need to make loans in the future, which will improve the ability of everyday people to afford to buy houses, incentivizing developers to build houses, etc, etc.
But this is an ideological fairy-tale. As Michael Hudson describes in his brilliant histories of jubilee — debt cancellation — through history, societies that unfailingly prioritize the claims of lenders over borrowers eventually collapse:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/08/jubilant/#construire-des-passerelles
Foundationally, debts are amassed by producers who need to borrow capital to make the things that we all need. A farmer needs to borrow for seed and equipment and labor in order to sow and reap the harvest. If the harvest comes in, the farmer pays their debts. But not every harvest comes in — blight, storms, war or sickness — will eventually cause a failure and a default.
In those bad years, farmers don’t pay their debts, and then they add to them, borrowing for the next year. Even if that year’s harvest is good, some debt remains. Gradually, over time, farmers catch enough bad beats that they end up hopelessly mired in debt — debt that is passed on to their kids, just as the right to collect the debts are passed on to the lenders’ kids.
Left on its own, this splits society into hereditary creditors who get to dictate the conduct of hereditary debtors. Run things this way long enough and every farmer finds themselves obliged to grow ornamental flowers and dainties for their creditors’ dinner tables, while everyone else goes hungry — and society collapses.
The answer is jubilee: periodically zeroing out creditors’ claims by wiping all debts away. Jubilees were declared when a new king took the throne, or at set intervals, or whenever things got too lopsided. The point of capital allocation is efficiency and thus shared prosperity, not enriching capital allocators. That enrichment is merely an incentive, not the goal.
For generations, American policy has been to make housing asset appreciation the primary means by which families amass and pass on wealth; this is in contrast to, say, labor rights, which produce wealth by rewarding work with more pay and benefits. The American vision is that workers don’t need rights as workers, they need rights as owners — of homes, which will always increase in value.
There’s an obvious flaw in this logic: houses are necessities, as well as assets. You need a place to live in order to raise a family, do a job, found a business, get an education, recover from sickness or live out your retirement. Making houses monotonically more expensive benefits the people who get in early, but everyone else ends up crushed when their human necessity is treated as an asset:
https://gen.medium.com/the-rents-too-damned-high-520f958d5ec5
Worse: without a strong labor sector to provide countervailing force for capital, US politics has become increasingly friendly to rent-seekers of all kinds, who have increased the cost of health-care, education, and long-term care to eye-watering heights, forcing workers to remortgage, or sell off, the homes that were meant to be the source of their family’s long-term prosperity:
https://doctorow.medium.com/the-end-of-the-road-to-serfdom-bfad6f3b35a9
Today, reality’s leftist bias is getting harder and harder to ignore. The idea that people who buy debt at pennies on the dollar should be cheered on as they drain the bank-accounts — or seize the homes — of people who do productive work is pure ideology, the kind of thing you’d expect to see on the WSJ’s editorial page, but which sticks out like a sore thumb in the news pages.
Thankfully, the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau is on the case. Director Rohit Chopra has warned the arm-breakers chasing payments on zombie mortgages that it’s illegal for them to “threaten judicial actions, such as foreclosures, for debts that are past a state’s statute of limitations.”
But there’s still plenty of room for more action. As Smith notes, the 2012 National Mortgage Settlement — a “get out of jail for almost free” card for the big banks — enticed lots of banks to discharge those second mortgages. Per Smith: “if any servicer sold a second mortgage to a vulture lender that it had charged off and used for credit in the National Mortgage Settlement, it defrauded the Feds and applicable state.”
Maybe some hungry state attorney general could go after the banks pulling these fast ones and hit them for millions in fines — and then use the money to build public housing.
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Catch me on tour with Red Team Blues in London and Berlin!
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/04/vulture-capitalism/#distressed-assets
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[Image ID: A Georgian eviction scene in which a bobby oversees three thugs who are using a battering ram to knock down a rural cottage wall. The image has been crudely colorized. A vulture looks on from the right, wearing a top-hat. The battering ram bears the WSJ logo.]
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urbanrelics · 1 year
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CHATEAU ROLLS ROYCE
The castle domain was created in the late 18th century. The wealthy notary A.S. started construction of the castle in 1780, originally consisting of a classicist main building, which was symmetrically flanked at the front by two lower, 19th-century side wings and several outbuildings, including a beautiful and almost unique winter garden.
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After the death of the notary, the property passed into the hands of his only son, who gave it significant added value by creating an English landscape garden. The surrounding park includes a pond with island and historic duck decoy, beautiful old woodland and a former ice house. When the son also died, the castle remained empty for a while. In 1831, the castle briefly served as the command post of Leopold I, first king of Belgium.
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In 1859 the whole was sold to a baron, who used it as a summer residence. In 1909, a wealthy Antwerp banker buys the castle. He builds the two towers that flank the castle. The castle remained in the hands of this family until the mid-1950s. Today, the castle and park are owned by the Luxembourg real estate company, which wants to start a hotel there in the future.
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In the urbex scene, this chateau was known as 'Chateau Rolls Royce', for many years, because of the beautiful blue Rolls Royce Silver Shadow. Rolls Royce built the Silver Shadow between 1965 and 1979. At the time, it was the most expensive and luxurious model introduced by Rolls Royce. This particular car was built in 1975 and was first registered in January 1976, as one of the last variants of the model. The colossus, weighing more than two tons, was more than 5 meters long, 1.80 meters wide and had a cylinder capacity of 6,750 CC. It reached a top speed of 205 km/h without much effort.
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kandisheek · 6 months
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FIC REC WEEK 14 – AUTHOR WEEK
AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: seventymilestobabylon
seventymilestobabylon is a jack of all trades. Whether it be angst, fluff, smut, action, humor, emotional highs and lows – they manage to be fantastic at all of it. Their writing style is wonderful, and I love the scenarios they come up with for their fics. Their dialogue especially makes me want to take a green pen to every fic and write 'Yes, yes, this!' next to every other sentence. They're an amazing author, and they deserve all the love they can get.
Here's some of their work that I think you should check out:
should be a dream but I'm not sleepy
Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 4,592 Tags: Huddling for Warmth, Cabin Fic, Telepathy
Summary: Steve and Tony get hit with a telepathy spell and a magical blizzard, and they have to take shelter in a cabin with fresh milk but no working electricity. Even when they can sort of read each other's minds, they are still terrible at communicating.
Reasons why I love it: I love everything about this fic. Tony patching Steve up, drinking hot cocoa, Steve wearing a goddamn Hagrid coat, it's all great. I especially love how they manage to misconstrue everything about each other's intentions, even when they're telepathically linked. We stan a lovable train-wreck ship. This fic is amazing, and I really hope you give it a shot, if you haven't read it already!
Bring Him Home
Pairing: Steve/Tony, Sam/Bucky Rating: E Words: 13,769 Tags: Fix-it, Post-CA:CW, Flip Phone
Summary: Tony misses Steve very badly after the Accords. Some days he deals with it better than other days. (a fic featuring the booty call flip phone, minor kidnappings, and time jumps between chapters because the election has been happening and my brain has been too mush to make a proper plot)
Reasons why I love it: Steve just plays a whole fucking symphony on my heartstrings in this one. He's so vulnerable and sad and I just want to wrap him in a thousand blankets, Christ. Luckily Tony is there for him when he needs it the most. I love how this fic manages to wrap up the whole Civil War drama without any extensive focus on the politics, it's really refreshing. And the dialogue is amazing. I love this fic, and I bet you will too, so give it a shot!
Triskelion Crescent
Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 26,949 Tags: Flower Shop, Neighborhood Associations, Epistolary
Summary: Steve Rogers runs a flower shop. Tony Stark owns a real estate company (eh, and it probably does other stuff too, like it's got "Industries" in the title) that's sniffing around Steve's neighborhood of Triskelion Crescent with an eye to building new developments. Triskelion Crescent fights back.
Reasons why I love it: Oh my god, Steve's merry band of Young Avengers are the cutest. Joyce Rumlow is such a genius idea as the neighborhood Karen, and I love how Steve sticks to his friendly demeanor always, committed to doing things the right way. Plus, the entire Stony plot going on parallel to the neighborhood drama is so fucking good, it makes me grin like an idiot. This fic is amazing, and I highly encourage you to read it!
Theory of Mind
Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 28,497 Tags: Gift Giving, Getting Together, Avengers Family
Summary: Or, five things Steve didn't let Tony buy him, and one thing he did
Reasons why I love it: One of my favorite 5+1 fics. The way their relationship develops is really satisfying – angsty and cute and emotional in turns. I also love how the team is set up, their friendships feel incredibly real. Natasha and Clint especially just completely stole the show for me. And the banter between Steve and Tony is top notch. This fic is amazing, and I hope you give it a shot!
sambar and scaffolding
Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 3,665 Tags: Cooking Class, Fluff, Humor
Summary: Steve ran away from SHIELD when they unfroze him and then accidentally ended up in the same cooking class as Tony Stark. 100% fluffy nonsense birthday fic for my lovely friend Renay.
Reasons why I love it: They're so fucking cute, they make me want to mash my face into a pillow. I love the mild identity porn going on, and Chitra is a wonderful OC who must be protected at all costs. That said, don't read this fic when you're hungry, because the descriptions of the recipe they're following will make your mouth water. This fic is wonderful, and I bet you'll love it just as much as I do!
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handeaux · 5 months
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In 1905, Cincinnati Vainly Hoped To Double Its Population In Just Five Years
Talk about optimism! In 1905, the Cincinnati Post ran a contest looking for ideas on how Cincinnati could increase its population to 600,000 in time for the 1910 census, only five years hence.
Although Cincinnati was still a growing city – no census marked a decrease in our city’s population until 1960 – any notion that the population might top half a million, much less 600,000 was beyond ambitious. It was flat-out crazy. Still, the progressive Cincinnati Post [16 November 1905] persisted, announcing monetary prizes for the best ideas on how to achieve a population explosion in a few short years.
“If someone should start a 600,000 club in Cincinnati, it would become the biggest organization in the world. This is evident in the fact that every one in Cincinnati, and nearly every one in Southern Ohio, Indiana, Kentucky and West Virginia, would join it. Not only are the people of Cincinnati interested for the greater city, but those outside the city also.”
In the event that folks needed a little incentive beyond civic pride, the Post offered monetary rewards for the best ideas on how to increase the city’s population to 600,000 by 1910. First prize was $50, second prize was $25 and five third prizes of $5 rounded out the awards. From November 1905 into mid-January 1906, the Post published ideas as they arrived and interviewed city dignitaries about the ingenuity of the contest.
Among the celebrities interviewed about the initiative was Joseph B. Foraker, former governor of Ohio and current U.S. Senator from Ohio. He told the Post [15 November 1905]:
“Keep building skyscrapers. One can scarcely realize the great change that has come to the city. Why, from my window they are jumping up until the city is looking like an oil field. They are filled, too, just as rapidly as they are built. Make room for the people, and they will come along.”
Compared to some of the other ideas submitted to the Post, Senator Foraker’s suggestion was rather tame.
J. Louis Bunn, a house painter, suggested rerouting the Ohio River from Coney Island to Sedamsville southward into Kentucky, so that Covington, Newport, Bellevue and Dayton would be transplanted to Ohio and therefore become part of Cincinnati.
Frank Boies, a shoe-cutter, was convinced that closing all saloons on Sunday would do the trick.
Harry Dilg, an express delivery driver, lobbied for more championship prize fights being hosted by Cincinnati.
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A contestant who signed his entry “Stranger” made a list of obstacles to Cincinnati’s growth. Would Cincinnati ever achieve 600,000 population? According to “Stranger”:
“Not as long as the Traction Company is not compelled to give the people better service. Not as long as the sweeping of any old rubbish, especially paper, off the sidewalk and into the street is allowed. Not as long as property-owners or their agents are indifferent to the appearance of property that has become vacant. Not as long as corporations are not compelled to think of others as well as themselves. The worst case of this kind will be found in the so-called ‘waiting room’ at the foot of Art Hill, sometimes called the Lock-st. Incline. W. Kesley Schoepf [president of the Traction Company] would not think of using it as a garage for his automobile, yet he expects patrons to ‘wait’ in there until one of his 5-cent carriages that you are compelled to stand up in half the time comes along.”
No newspaper contest, of course, would be complete without an entry from an adorable schoolgirl. The Post [28 December 1905] prominently blazoned the ideas of 13-year-old Gladys Schultz of Linwood, who wrote her contribution in verse:
“Annex all the villages in Hamilton County; Give all small manufactories a bounty. Exempt from taxation all chattels; Help the businessman fight some of his battles. Tax real estate all it will stand – The banker can lend a helping hand. Fill the Mill Creek Valley above high-water mark. Build factories thereon with space for a park. An underground railway, with a boulevard top, Our unsightly canal will make a beautiful spot. A union depot for all railroads to come in, Will bring 600,000 by 1910!”
The Post encouraged contestants to submit multiple entries and John Miller, a harness maker, complied by compiling 36 ideas into a single entry. Mr. Miller [11 December 1905] covered quite a bit of territory with his suggestions, ranging from the mundane . . .
“22. For Cincinnati to send a letter of thanks to President Roosevelt and Secretary Taft for the good they did in the last election.”
. . . to the idealistic.:
“36. Abolish capital punishment.”
Along the way, Mr. Miller lobbied for more monuments, an eight-hour work day, honest elections, free schoolbooks in the public schools, more parks along the riverfront and better service at the city hospital.
The winner of the big $50 prize was Marion L. Pernice Jr., assistant advertising manager of the Fay & Egan Company, manufacturers of woodworking machinery. His suggestion boiled down to essentially one word: Advertise! Pernice suggested that all goods manufactured in Cincinnati be labeled “From Cincinnati” and that only goods manufactured in Cincinnati be eligible for that slogan. All suburban manufacturers would lobby for annexation to Cincinnati to carry that prestigious mark.
Alas, the contest did not achieve its stated goal. Cincinnati’s population in 1905, approximately 340,000, reached only 364,000 in 1910. Evan worse, the census of 1910 marked the first time since 1830 that Cincinnati was not ranked among the largest 10 cities in the United States. It would be 1950 before Cincinnati achieved 500,000 residents and 60 years of population decline followed until an uptick in the 2020 census.
And yet, no serious discussion about re-channeling the Ohio River.
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lowqualitygarbage · 7 months
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I said I would do it and I did! now to list how I thibk the map would go...
1.Vault City(Might have to remake that bit, gears are hard man) An cluster of different vaults, fomr 666 to vault 91316(clerical error), Mostly keep to themsleves, too barriekaced for the Jesus freaks to attack. 2.Pentagram City nuclear power plant. A swampy, and Highly Radioactive place, the cause of all these gamama storms. Is also the base of the local super mutants, who make a living by making and selling Fusion cores and Other Power supplies.
3.The Hazbin hotel The top part of pentgram city got blown away a long time ago, with the rubble now holding host to rock Lichen and Deer, but their still stands one building, a grand hotel... that was abodnoned pre war. But hey, free real estate is hard to come by, so you take what you can get.
4.The overgrown. The site of one to many people playing with Gecks, FEV, and wepaon testing, this fast growning forest of Sun flowers, corn and beans. Place is mostly used for both food and weapon testing.
5.Cannible town The old town of the city, now taken over by the ghoul rosie. They provide most of the cloth and leather in the Area, but also work as a dispole for corpses.
6.Factories Carmilla Carbine. War never changes, and someone has to meet the demands. Family owned, run and operated since 2011.
7. Vee's Company All manner of diversion and dalliance await those who cross the threshold with coin in hand, god I love the darkest dungeon.
8.Heavens landing zone. The jesus Freaks main outpost for the place. Mostly used to park their Airships. 9.The old Quarry No longer used,it's much easier to harvest the cars and ruined buildings, but their are rumors of something lurking down thier
10.The old camping area Still used form time to time, mostly for lumber, but also a Romantic get away spot. Remember to not feed the yao guai.
11.The old woods. As far as most will go, but some still go is to find some better game. Usally get picked off by the people living their.
!!! HOLY SHIT!
Oh my god, this is fantastic! I love the thought you've put into it! You've even put in radial areas for exploring, and plot hooks, and little bits of world building!
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The other vaults in the area are loosely based on some of the other Rings of Hell, with their Sins as the current overseers. The experiments in the vaults shaped their social structures similar to the Rings we see in Helluva Boss. The wrath-equivalent would have limited resources and dwellers had to win their rights to rations, greed had a social system enforced that encouraged stockpiling and extortion, etc. I don't have numbers or much beyond bare bones for them, since I've been focusing on the Hazbin crew.
Heaven having a dedicated landing zone could be enforced by drone/turret placements, or it could be that it's easier for Wastelanders to let them keep that space clear since at least that way they know where the staging grounds are and can monitor/avoid it.
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marketmagnatize · 1 month
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Top 10 Business Ideas That Will Make You Rich
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In today's fast-paced and ever-evolving world, entrepreneurship offers countless opportunities to build wealth. Whether you're a seasoned entrepreneur or a budding innovator, exploring the right business idea can lead to significant financial success. Here are ten business ideas that have the potential to make you rich.
1. E-commerce Store
E-commerce continues to thrive, with online shopping becoming the norm for consumers. Launching an e-commerce store that caters to a niche market can be incredibly profitable. By offering unique, high-quality products, and leveraging digital marketing strategies, you can reach a global audience. Subscription boxes, eco-friendly products, or personalized items are examples of niches with high demand.
2. Digital Marketing Agency
As businesses shift towards online operations, the demand for digital marketing services has skyrocketed. Starting a digital marketing agency that specializes in SEO, social media management, content marketing, or pay-per-click advertising can be highly lucrative. Success in this field requires staying updated with the latest trends and delivering measurable results to clients.
3. App Development
The mobile app industry is booming, with millions of apps available on various platforms. If you have a background in coding or can collaborate with skilled developers, creating innovative apps can lead to substantial profits. Whether it's a gaming app, a productivity tool, or a social networking platform, a successful app can generate revenue through in-app purchases, ads, or subscriptions.
4. Real Estate Investment
Real estate has long been a proven way to build wealth. Investing in rental properties, flipping houses, or even starting a real estate development company can yield high returns. The key is to research markets thoroughly, understand property values, and manage your investments wisely. In addition to traditional real estate, consider emerging trends like vacation rentals and co-living spaces.
5. Health and Wellness Products
The health and wellness industry is experiencing rapid growth, driven by an increased focus on healthy living. Starting a business that offers health supplements, organic foods, fitness equipment, or wellness coaching can be very profitable. Consumers are willing to invest in products and services that promote a healthier lifestyle, making this sector a promising area for entrepreneurs.
6. Online Education and E-learning
The rise of remote work and online learning has created a massive demand for e-learning platforms and online courses. If you have expertise in a particular field, you can create and sell online courses, or develop a platform that connects educators with learners. This business model offers scalability and the potential for passive income, as courses can be sold repeatedly without additional production costs.
7. Renewable Energy Solutions
With the global push towards sustainability, businesses in the renewable energy sector are thriving. Starting a company that offers solar panel installation, energy-efficient appliances, or green building materials can be highly profitable. Governments and consumers are increasingly seeking eco-friendly solutions, making this an ideal time to enter the market.
8. Freelance Services Platform
The gig economy is expanding rapidly, with more people seeking freelance opportunities. Creating a platform that connects freelancers with clients in fields like graphic design, writing, programming, or virtual assistance can be a successful business venture. By charging a commission on transactions, you can build a profitable business while providing a valuable service.
9. Artificial Intelligence and Automation
AI and automation are transforming industries across the board. Starting a business that offers AI-driven solutions, such as chatbots, predictive analytics, or robotic process automation (RPA), can lead to significant wealth. Companies are eager to adopt AI technologies to streamline operations, reduce costs, and improve customer experiences, making this a high-demand area.
10. Subscription Box Service
Subscription box services have gained immense popularity, offering consumers curated products delivered to their doorsteps regularly. From beauty products to gourmet foods, subscription boxes cater to a wide range of interests. Starting a subscription box business allows for recurring revenue and customer loyalty, provided you offer unique and valuable products.
For more such content visit on Tanishq website .
Conclusion
These ten business ideas represent some of the most promising opportunities for building wealth in today's economy. While each requires a different level of expertise, investment, and commitment, the potential rewards are substantial. Success in any of these ventures will depend on thorough market research, innovative thinking, and relentless execution. By choosing the right idea and dedicating yourself to its growth, you can achieve significant financial success and long-term wealth. Click here to open other post.
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atonalginger · 3 months
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WIP Wed on a Thursday
because @eridanidreams is right, time is a flat circle.
I forgot to post on Wednesday because I was very caught up in both writing and painting and just..well...forgot! so today it is! I also forgot to upload the next chapter of Through Plasma and Flames but I think that's okay since I had been uploading 3x a week and I can just upload later today or tomorrow or just start back up on Sat....it's ready just needs the final edit pass
any way I'm rambling!
first the art that has been holding my attention for very long hours
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well some of it anyway. if you're on the Coemancer discord you've seen the version with the flat colored elf on top as well. this background took my 6 hours on top of the 5 I spend finishing the outline and building the palette and the 5 before that getting all the rough sketches in order. And I still have to finish the character not seen. Been a while since I've spend this much time on a piece. and I mentioned I was busy writing so I think I should share a peek of that as well. Yesterday I got back on my Dellarov bullshit with a scene for the next story in the Libertatia series. I'll put that below the cut for the sake of not drowning everyone's dashes.
I think eri got justabout everyone so my tag is open to anyone who sees and would like to share something they've got. It's not Wednesday, no, but it's still fun.
“So first order of business is what I think is the most promising shot we’ve located,” Becker held up a slate and shook it at the outlaws, “Tropics, you’ll have coral bugs, brainsprouts, and silver fins as neighbors and we came across a lot of those ugly space roaches Sophie seems to love so much. It’s nearish the coast. Not a simply stroll to the beach but close enough that a coastal spaceport wouldn’t be unreasonable. We found an abandoned UC listening post tucked into the hills. And like properly abandoned, didn’t even find spacers squatting in there.”
“It’s in near pristine condition,” Jay touched her friend’s hand to stop them from continuing to shake the slate, “and still has sealed supply crates from its construction. Likely built near the beginning of the Colony War and promptly abandoned when fronts shifted. We gave coordinates to your people and from what I understand Shinya has a small crew out there now to hold it until you’ve looked it over.”
“So is the desire for coastal real estate a tactical one or purely aesthetic?” Sam asked as he ran his finger though his hair, “because Cora, Manny, and Me found a spot down to the south that would be perfect but it’s smack dab in the center of the continent.”
“Both?” Del shrugged, “easier to build a spaceport on a coast where the trees are thin than needing to clear and level stretches of land. But I won’t deny the view is a definite bonus.” A playful smile flashed across his face, “And we are pirates after all.”
“You are,” Sam shook his head but made no attempt to hide his smile, “and pirates like to smuggle goods. On the beach you’re exposed, anyone nosy enough could start scanning your port from orbit with jammers only able to do so much. But if you had a large cave system you could more easily mask the hot product you’re moving.”
“Caves are very nice,” Rokov said as he looked up to Sam, “but caves on this planet are never simple.”
“They aren’t but it even that could play in your favor,” Sam tapped his temple and pointed at Rokov, “Cora and Manny located an abandoned pharmaceutical research lab in a big forest that is built more or less on top of the cave system. Nearby is an observation deck that needs minimal repairs to get back up and operational. The cave itself is home to some fungus that the lab was trying to study when the company went bankrupt. Majority of the spores are off in secluded wings and far back and with proper respirators your crew would be safe to even use those spaces to store goods. Research we found in the computers showed the spores are a mildly toxic but only really a danger if someone stands directly over the damn thing and huffs the spore clouds over a long period of time. There’s already cleaning stations build into the warehouse situated over the mouth of the cave.”
“A smuggler’s dream,” Becker looked over at the cowboy with their jaw on the table, “those research terminals didn’t mention if they found a use for the fungus did it?”
“No medicinal uses. Mild stimulant but everything they tried ended up making test subjects sick because the fungus is mildly toxic.” Sam shook his head as he chuckled low, “but the spores also seem to keep all but the peskiest of pests, like heatleeches and xenophages, from burrowing. With some reinforcements the cave could become the Liberated vault.”
“Worth checking out and potentially securing both,” Bella looked to Del and Rokov, “With a listening post and an observation deck we’d have a finger on the pulse of every movement on this planet and and both locations would mean less that needs built in the long run.”
“Lower up front costs,” Becker pointed at Bella with their slate. Bella nodded approvingly, “precisely.”
“Bogs going to have a field day experimenting with that fungus,” Rokov whispered to Del.
His husband sighed through his nose and pinched the bridge of his nose, “and Samina will be screeching the whole time.”
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hostpyters · 3 months
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🚀 The Best Small Business Loans in 2024
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mirzablogs · 4 months
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Josip Heit Reviews: A Comprehensive Look at His Ventures and Successes
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When it comes to business moguls who have successfully diversified their portfolios across multiple industries, Josip Heit Review stands out as a remarkable figure. His ventures span luxury vehicle leasing, real estate, technology, and other innovative sectors. This blog delves into the multifaceted business empire of Josip Heit, focusing on his vehicle leasing in the luxury goods sector, his wide range of products, and other business pursuits. We’ll provide an in-depth, positive review of his achievements, highlighting ten key positive reviews that reflect his exceptional business acumen and customer satisfaction.
Vehicle Leasing in the Luxury Goods Sector
A Leader in Luxury Vehicle Leasing
Josip Heit has made significant strides in the vehicle leasing sector, particularly with luxury cars. His company offers an array of high-end vehicles that cater to clients looking for premium experiences. From luxury sedans to high-performance sports cars, the leasing options provided by Heit’s enterprise are second to none.
Why Choose Josip Heit for Vehicle Leasing?
1. Exclusive Fleet: Josip Heit’s leasing company boasts a fleet of the latest luxury cars from renowned brands like Rolls-Royce, Bentley, and Lamborghini. This exclusive selection ensures clients have access to the best vehicles on the market. 2. Customized Leasing Plans: Understanding that each client has unique needs, the company offers tailored leasing plans. Whether it’s for short-term use or long-term commitments, there’s a plan that fits every requirement. 3. Exceptional Customer Service: Heit’s company prides itself on providing outstanding customer service. From the moment a client expresses interest to the end of the lease period, the customer journey is smooth and satisfying. 4. Maintenance and Support: One of the standout features of leasing a vehicle from Josip Heit is the comprehensive maintenance and support services. Clients can enjoy their luxury cars without worrying about upkeep, as all maintenance is handled by expert technicians. 5. Competitive Pricing: Despite offering premium vehicles, the leasing company maintains competitive pricing. This ensures that luxury vehicle leasing is accessible to a wider audience without compromising on quality.
Positive Reviews from Satisfied Clients
Here are ten positive reviews from clients who have experienced Josip Heit’s exceptional vehicle leasing services:
- The selection of luxury cars is unparalleled. Leasing a Bentley from Josip Heit’s company was a dream come true! - I was impressed with the personalized leasing plan they offered. It perfectly suited my needs. - Customer service is top-notch. They made the entire process so easy and enjoyable. - Maintenance was never a worry. The company took care of everything, allowing me to enjoy my car stress-free. - Competitive pricing for such high-end vehicles is a game-changer. Highly recommend! - The fleet is always updated with the latest models. I felt like a VIP driving my leased Lamborghini. - Flexibility in leasing terms is a big plus. I appreciated the ability to choose what worked best for me. - Support staff are knowledgeable and always available. They truly understand luxury vehicles. - Leasing from Josip Heit was a seamless experience. From selection to delivery, everything was perfect. - The attention to detail in their services is commendable. They exceed expectations every time.
Innovative Products and Business Ventures
Expanding Horizons Beyond Vehicle Leasing
While Josip Heit’s luxury vehicle leasing business is a cornerstone of his empire, his ventures extend far beyond. Heit has a keen eye for innovation and has successfully diversified into various sectors, including real estate, technology, and renewable energy.
Real Estate Ventures
Josip Heit’s real estate business focuses on luxury properties and sustainable development. His projects are known for their architectural excellence and environmental consciousness. By integrating cutting-edge technology and sustainable practices, Heit is redefining luxury living.
Technology and Innovation
In the technology sector, Heit has invested in several startups and established companies that are at the forefront of innovation. His interest in tech spans artificial intelligence, blockchain, and renewable energy technologies. These investments not only promise high returns but also contribute to the advancement of critical technologies.
Renewable Energy Projects
Understanding the importance of sustainability, Josip Heit has also ventured into renewable energy. His projects include solar farms and wind energy installations, which are aimed at reducing carbon footprints and promoting green energy solutions.
Positive Reviews from Business Associates
Here are ten positive reviews from business associates who have partnered with Josip Heit:
- Josip Heit’s vision for sustainable real estate is groundbreaking. His projects set new standards in luxury living. - Working with Josip in the tech sector has been inspiring. His investments have propelled our company to new heights. - His commitment to renewable energy is commendable. Josip Heit is truly making a difference in the fight against climate change. - Partnering with Josip Heit has opened numerous doors for our business. His network is vast and influential. - His strategic insights are invaluable. Josip Heit is a visionary leader. - The level of professionalism and expertise he brings to the table is unmatched. Highly recommend collaborating with him. - Josip’s dedication to innovation is evident in every project he undertakes. He is a true pioneer. - His focus on sustainability is inspiring. Josip Heit is leading the way in green business practices. - Working with Josip has been a game-changer for our company. His guidance and support are unparalleled. - Josip Heit’s business acumen is exceptional. He consistently delivers results that exceed expectations.
Conclusion
Josip Heit’s business ventures are a testament to his extraordinary vision and entrepreneurial spirit. From luxury vehicle leasing to sustainable real estate and cutting-edge technology, Heit has successfully established a diverse and thriving business empire. The positive reviews from clients and business associates alike underscore his commitment to excellence and innovation.
Whether you are looking to lease a luxury vehicle, invest in prime real estate, or explore innovative technologies, Josip Heit’s ventures offer unparalleled opportunities. His dedication to customer satisfaction, sustainable practices, and technological advancement makes him a standout figure in the business world. As his empire continues to grow, Josip Heit remains a beacon of success and a source of inspiration for aspiring entrepreneurs.
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wedesignyouny · 7 months
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Set the Standard: Atlas NYC Unveils the Best Property Management Companies in NYC
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Set the Standard: Atlas NYC Unveils the Best Property Management Companies in NYC
The success of your investment depends on selecting the correct property management partner in the dynamic and quick-paced world of New York City real estate. Of all the options, Atlas NYC stands out as a model of quality, establishing the benchmark for property management in the city that never sleeps. In this piece, we examine the essential characteristics that set Atlas NYC apart as one of the best property management companies in NYC, providing a smooth fusion of experience, creativity, and unmatched customer care.
Unrivaled Local Knowledge
A thorough awareness of the local environment is necessary to successfully navigate the complexity of the New York City real estate market. The team at Atlas NYC has unmatched experience since they have developed a thorough understanding of the various neighborhoods, laws, and market trends that make up the city. Atlas NYC’s ability to adjust its property management techniques to the specific needs and problems of each property under its care is made possible by its local understanding.
All-inclusive Property Management Solutions
To maximize the performance and value of your investment, Atlas NYC provides a full range of property management services. Every area of property ownership is managed with accuracy and care according to the company’s holistic strategy, which includes tenant relations, maintenance, financial administration, and strategic planning.
Important Services Consist of:
1. Tenant Relations and Screening:
· Strict screening procedures to find qualified tenants.
· Tenant relations should be proactive and responsive to promote happy living situations.
2. Upkeep and Fixtures:
· Proactive maintenance plans to deal with problems before they get worse.
· Effective management of maintenance, guaranteeing the durability and allure of every asset.
3. Accounting for Finances:
· Efficient and open financial administration.
· Rent collecting, planning, and reporting done on time to maximize profits.
4. Adherence to the Law:
· Observance of regional laws and compliance standards.
· Reduction of the legal hazards related to property administration.
5. Planning Strategically:
· Customized plans to optimize value and return on investment for every property.
· Proactive preparation to keep up with changes and developments in the industry.
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Inventive Integration of Technology
Efficiency is critical in a city renowned for its fast-paced way of living. Atlas NYC uses state-of-the-art technology to make property management processes more efficient. Technology is smoothly incorporated to improve the customer experience, from online portals that give property owners real-time insights to automated processes that improve communication and productivity.
Client-Centered Methodology
Atlas NYC’s steadfast dedication to customer satisfaction distinguishes it as one of the top property management firms in NYC. The organization places a high value on candid communication, openness, and a customized strategy to meet the particular requirements of every property owner. Throughout the management process, Atlas NYC makes sure that you feel informed and confident, regardless of your level of experience as an investor.
Increase Your Capital with Atlas NYC
Selecting the best property management company in NYC is an investment in the longevity and profitability of your real estate endeavors, not just a choice. At the forefront, Atlas NYC exemplifies the characteristics that characterize the best in property management. Visit atlasnyc.com to learn more about Atlas NYC’s extensive services and track record, and discover a new level of property management in the center of the never-sleeping metropolis.
GET IN TOUCH WITH US
Atlas NYC Property Management, LLC
77 14th Street Brooklyn, NY 11215
718-768-8888
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theresearchblog · 10 months
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Online Recruitment Platform Market Detailed Strategies, Competitive Landscaping and Developments for next 5 years
Latest released the research study on Global Online Recruitment Platform Market, offers a detailed overview of the factors influencing the global business scope. Online Recruitment Platform Market research report shows the latest market insights, current situation analysis with upcoming trends and breakdown of the products and services. The report provides key statistics on the market status, size, share, growth factors of the Online Recruitment Platform The study covers emerging player’s data, including: competitive landscape, sales, revenue and global market share of top manufacturers are LinkedIn (United States), Monster (United States), Indeed (United States), CareerBuilder (United States), Naukri.com (India), Seek Limited (Australia), Zhilian Zhaopin (China), DHI Group, Inc. (United States), SimplyHired, Inc. (United States), StepStone (Germany),
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Online Recruitment Platform Market Definition:
Online recruitment platform is also known as E-recruitment or an internet recruiting platform that allows businesses to use various internet-based solutions for online advertisement and job listing to hire the best candidate for the particular job role. In today’s time increasing use of internet and evolution of advanced technologies has made easier to scout candidates and conduct the interview. The platforms offer facilities for job seekers to upload their details and resumes online.
Market Drivers:
Increasing Use of Online Recruitment Platforms for Potential Talent Scouting Across the Globe
Increasing Use of the Internet and Advanced Technologies to Reach Bigger Audience
Market Opportunities:
High Adoption by the SMEs Due to Its Cost-effectiveness and Flexibility
Market Trend:
Development of Innovative Features in Online Recruitment Applications by the Providers
The Global Online Recruitment Platform Market segments and Market Data Break Down are illuminated below:
by Type (Permanent, Part-Time, Internship), Vertical (BFSI, IT & Telecom, Healthcare, Food & Beverages, Real Estate, Travelling & Hospitality, Media & Entertainment, Automotive, Others), Enterprise Size (Small & Medium Enterprises, Large Enterprises)
Region Included are: North America, Europe, Asia Pacific, Oceania, South America, Middle East & Africa
Country Level Break-Up: United States, Canada, Mexico, Brazil, Argentina, Colombia, Chile, South Africa, Nigeria, Tunisia, Morocco, Germany, United Kingdom (UK), the Netherlands, Spain, Italy, Belgium, Austria, Turkey, Russia, France, Poland, Israel, United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, China, Japan, Taiwan, South Korea, Singapore, India, Australia and New Zealand etc.
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Strategic Points Covered in Table of Content of Global Online Recruitment Platform Market:
Chapter 1: Introduction, market driving force product Objective of Study and Research Scope the Online Recruitment Platform market
Chapter 2: Exclusive Summary – the basic information of the Online Recruitment Platform Market.
Chapter 3: Displayingthe Market Dynamics- Drivers, Trends and Challenges of the Online Recruitment Platform
Chapter 4: Presenting the Online Recruitment Platform Market Factor Analysis Porters Five Forces, Supply/Value Chain, PESTEL analysis, Market Entropy, Patent/Trademark Analysis.
Chapter 5: Displaying market size by Type, End User and Region 2015-2020
Chapter 6: Evaluating the leading manufacturers of the Online Recruitment Platform market which consists of its Competitive Landscape, Peer Group Analysis, BCG Matrix & Company Profile
Chapter 7: To evaluate the market by segments, by countries and by manufacturers with revenue share and sales by key countries (2021-2026).
Chapter 8 & 9: Displaying the Appendix, Methodology and Data Source
Finally, Online Recruitment Platform Market is a valuable source of guidance for individuals and companies in decision framework.
Data Sources & Methodology The primary sources involves the industry experts from the Global Online Recruitment Platform Market including the management organizations, processing organizations, analytics service providers of the industry’s value chain. All primary sources were interviewed to gather and authenticate qualitative & quantitative information and determine the future prospects.
In the extensive primary research process undertaken for this study, the primary sources – Postal Surveys, telephone, Online & Face-to-Face Survey were considered to obtain and verify both qualitative and quantitative aspects of this research study. When it comes to secondary sources Company's Annual reports, press Releases, Websites, Investor Presentation, Conference Call transcripts, Webinar, Journals, Regulators, National Customs and Industry Associations were given primary weight-age.
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What benefits does AMA research study is going to provide?
Latest industry influencing trends and development scenario
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To Seize powerful market opportunities
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Assisting in allocating marketing investments
Definitively, this report will give you an unmistakable perspective on every single reality of the market without a need to allude to some other research report or an information source. Our report will give all of you the realities about the past, present, and eventual fate of the concerned Market.
Thanks for reading this article; you can also get individual chapter wise section or region wise report version like North America, Europe or Southeast Asia.
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