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#Winning the Uncertain
chirpsythismorning · 1 year
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Milkvans complaining about bylers not mentioning Finn’s response about about the monologue is so funny, as if it didn’t support byler endgame even more 🤣
Finn saying I think he knows she thinks all this, bc I think there’s a reason why he says it, is because she— she— he’s been waiting to say it for a long time and she’s been waiting for him to say it for a long time. I think it’s an interesting thought, having that reciprocated. Yeah I think so. I don’t… I don’t know. I would hope… idk… great question and thought tho…
Like he literally cuts himself off before implying that Mike knows how El feels and that she wanted him to say I love you for a while, which is the very reason why he said it in the first place, despite seasons of attempting to say it, stalling repeatedly, only to fail each time up until now when there was literally no option not to in his eyes…
How is that a milkvan win?…
Not only that, but he didn’t make it sound hopeful for their future either. It’s still up in the air according to him. He makes a point of just saying interesting question over and over, only to not actually come up with an answer…
The assumption for many viewers, specifically milkvans, is that everything is great for Mike and El right now bc the monologue fixed everything. If that’s the case why does Finn end that question on a sort of question mark with it still up in the air? Least of all when you’re dealing with a queer ship on the other end, with him making much more of an effort to imply that it will be addressed. It’ll pay off vs. idk?…
This is like the casts reaction to the monologue all over again. The interviewer asked about Mike and El’s future and Finn basically danced around it saying he’s looking forward to all of their endings and is mostly interested to know if Mike will stay in Hawkins, adding at the end that he hopes Mike and El you know, find… happiness.
He’s always giving answers that work both ways. Byler endgame still fits in with whatever he says, whether milkvans want to acknowledge that or not.
Otherwise there would be no reason for him to try so hard to be ambiguous about Mike and El’s feelings, as if it’s this big spoiler… unless what’s about to go down is something most the audience won’t expect…
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miralines · 1 year
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While we’re talking about war crimes. With the massive caveat that I am not an expert on international law, I think that legally speaking, Tim blowing up the moon may not technically qualify as a war crime. Because most of the provisions about excessive destruction specify that you have to knowingly be causing excessive destruction, and I’m not sure whether it’s clear Tim meant to blow up the entire moon, or just the Kaiser’s palace. So if hypothetically speaking I were Tim’s lawyer (though I am still not an expert) I’d probably be arguing that the cannon setting off a chain reaction with the rest of the bombs on the moon was an unforeseeable side effect, and thus an accident, and that it does not legally qualify as a war crime.
That said, the rampage of Tim Goes Crazy is very clearly a war crime (or series of war crimes) based on the Geneva Convention’s provision that quarter must be given.
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drumlincountry · 4 months
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today I took ANTI-DEPRESSION MEASURES like MAKING DELICIOUS STEW and DONATING TO PALESTINIAN CHILDREN'S RELIEF FUND and GOING FOR A RUN
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dykedragons · 7 months
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everyone wish me luck in my attempt to teach myself how to apply to scholarships effectively
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xenonmoon · 8 months
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Just a little post to say I'm not gone, I'm just going through a very intense and stressful period and I'm constantly out of spoons
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takeonmetakemeon · 13 days
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The best election ever. The contrast is beautiful. This is art.
Sunak:
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Starmer:
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As they say, it's difficult to make predictions, especially about the future. So no matter how much this looks like political malpractice, we should not discount the political instincts of a Prime Minister who held onto a safe seat in Parliament year after year for nearly a decade.
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volivolition · 2 months
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friend i think ur propaganda is working let's fuckin go -Vol
THANK YOU VOL IM TRYING SO HARD!! :'0!! WE WERE LEADING FOR A BIT AND NOW WE'RE BACK DOWN AGAIN AND IM SO!! DISTRAUGHT!!!
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VOTE VOLITION GET HIM BACK UP THERE PLEASE!!!
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wutaijiemei · 2 years
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i think living with 2 cis girls is really doing something to me .
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mailikeswrestling · 2 years
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hangman vs danielson will be a banger bc they always are
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iridescentis · 16 days
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Chapter 10 of We Were Younger is posted! Our second choice has arrived, so this chapter is a little short but we finally find out what happened. Sorry in advance.
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shibe · 1 year
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i am processing…and i am angry
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astonmartinii · 4 months
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undercover verstappen | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem verstappen!reader
get you a girlfriend who will threaten mutiny to get you a seat at a competent team
based on this request: HI BABES I HOPE YOU ARE WELL! I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM! So basically I have an idea for a (possible?) Smau series, so basically it's Charles leclerc × verstappen!reader, she is a reserve driver for redbull but is also maxs race engineer (idk if you call it that? The person that talks to them that one) so she's very involved with the team and f1 in general. The public doesn't know that her and Charles are dating, and they don't even think it as Charles and max "hate" eachother (they are both doing this to protect readers and Charles relationship, they are actually besties) and basically, reader has enough if ferraris tractor, so she's like 'I will get you too redbull' and then checo retires at the end of the 2023 season, and instead of taking the job when she was offered it, she asks if Charles could have it (obviously not publicised) and Christian is like "Yes very good idea" so he asks Charles who is uncertain at first but is then OK with the idea (he is worried about becoming a second driver to max but there is lots of reassuring that he won't be nd so he accepts) and then he goes on to win 2024 wdc (and wcc but irrelevant) and he's sad that he couldn't do it with ferrari omg that's long sorry babes - @lillians-world-is-f1
MASTERLIST | TIPS | F1 SMALL BUSINESS
redbullracing
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tagged: schecoperez
redbullracing: checo has informed the team that he will be retiring from the sport at the end of the 2023 season. we thank checo for his service and all the good times, he will forever be a legend of this sport. VAMOS CHECO 👏
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user1: EXCUSE ME?
user2: they really thought they could drop this on a monday and we'd all be chill
maxverstappen1: i've heard tequila tastes even better when you're retired, congrats mate - we'll miss you
user3: wait does this mean it'll be double verstappen on the grid now?
user4: there's more than one of them?
user5: max's sister is the girl you'll hear on his radio and she's technically the reserve driver as well. so she might step up to the second seat now checo has retired
user6: idk about you but that spells trouble to me
yourusername: congrats checo! will miss you, carola and all the little ones x
schecoperez: you won't be able to get rid of them that easily, i'll be cashing in on some well earned babysitting hours
yourusername: can't wait !!!
user7: what i'm hearing is that there's a chance for a daniel return to red bull?
user8: double verstappen or maxiel i don't want to choose they're both my children
user9: i'm making an outside shout for a charles leclerc red bull era
user10: i am seeing the lestappen vision
user11: my personal headcanon is that both verstappens and charles are all besties and have always been besties
christianhorner: thank you for your service checo, first drink on me 👍
user12: i know christian is sweating having to make a choice between child no 2 y/n and child no 3 daniel
user13: idk i think daniel might have the edge
user14: if geri or max have anything to do with it we might have a team so dutch that the car will be orange next season
user15: christian punching the walls cause lando extended his mclaren contract literally last week 😭
EXCERPT OF RECORDING OF THE RED BULL GARAGE, ABU DHABI
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 892,309 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: verstappens take the city
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user18: i just know they are simultaneously the best people to party with but also the people you probably don’t want at a house party
yourusername: i’ll have you know i once plunged a toilet at a house party and disposed of a “sick sandwich” i am a DELIGHT
user19: and max?
yourusername: no comment
maxverstappen1: as if ! i don’t care if we’re blood im suing you for slander
yourusername: i watched you volley a vase at AD21
maxverstappen1: i paid for it !!! and you said it was a sick shot anyway FAKE
yourusername: you can say that cause personally i was not at fault of any of my actions that night x
user20: PLEASE MA'AM AT LEAST ONE SEASON OF DOUBLE TROUBLE PLEASE
user21: idk if i could deal with seeing jos verstappen every weekend tho...
user22: obsessed with how neither verstappen follow charles but here he be in her notifications again
user23: someone add it to the interaction spreadsheet i am CONVINCED it will one day lead to more
landonorris: lando norris erasure once again
user24: DID YOU WRITE THAT NOTE???
landonorris: hell no i'd rather peel my skin off than call the three raccoons disguised as a woman pretty
yourusername: good gosh we would've got the point without all of that
maxverstappen1: yeah lando only i'm allowed to call y/n the raccoons in a trench coat. know your place.
user25: so you do wanna tell us who wrote the note then?
yourusername: nope ;p
user26: only y/n and max have been spotted out so maybe it's just brotherly love
user27: LOL? MAX? BROTHERLY LOVE?
danielricciardo: invite seemed to get lost in the mail again
yourusername: either get a room or get out of my comment section
maxverstappen1: ???
user28: no maxiel red bull again. i don't think y/n's blood pressure can take it
f1
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 2,544,924 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
f1: ready to see them as teammates? charles leclerc has signed a deal with red bull to keep him at the team until 2028.
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user29: excuse me *clears throat* WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
redbullracing: welcome charles!!! no inchidents please
charles_leclerc: will we ever hear the end of that joke?
redbullracing: we know what the girlies want charles
maxverstappen1: you get used to it after a while. no ice bath thirst traps here though
charles_leclerc: phew 😥
user30: this little hoe pretending he didn't love it
user31: wait ??? does this mean what i think it could mean? GIRLFRIEND?
user32: i can't take leaving ferrari and a girlfriend in one day sorry
yourusername: welcome to the team charles :)
user33: don't think we forgot about the recording babe... IS THIS WHO YOU RECOMMENED?
danielricciardo: it better not be because if you recommended your lil boyfriend over sexy ol' me i'm gonna be real mad 😭
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user34: WE SAW THAT WHAT THE FUCK
maxverstappen1: daniel you are so fucking dumb
yourusername: MAX? IGNORE IT?
maxverstappen1: bro it's all over twitter you might as well take the moment to curse out daniel before christian confiscates our phones
yourusername: DANIEL JOSEPH RICCIARDO YOU RAT BASTARD I'M GONNA RIP WHATEVER REMAINING HAIR YOU HAVE LEFT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR SURPRISINGLY PERKY ASS. IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT YOU AND YOUR CHILD BEARING HIPS WILL NEVER GET CLOSE TO A RED BULL EVER AGAIN FOR EXPOSING A SECRET US THREE HAVE KEPT FOR SEVEN FUCKING YEARS
charles_leclerc: what she said
maxverstappen1: oop.
user35: well. can we keep going this is quite fun.
christianhorner: they're all in time out sorry
user36: okay well now that happened... when can we get "who knows me better my boyfriend or my brother" lestappen version 🤨
charles_leclerc: i would wipe the floor with him
maxverstappen1: of course you would you BIG FAT NERD
charles_leclerc: i thought christian took your phone?
maxverstappen1: as if he doesn't fall for the verstappen puppy dog eyes every time
charles_leclerc: you'll use them for me right babe, RIGHT BABE?
yourusername: idk charlie, this is family business
christianhorner: i've taken their phones again
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,304,555 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
yourusername: my favourite men in the world doing what they do best
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user37: take me out back and shoot me already
christianhorner: interesting i don't see myself here and considering i pay your wages...
yourusername: dads go in different categories?
christianhorner: don't use my paternal instincts against me y/n
yourusername: say goodbye to your father's day card
christianhorner: NO I'M SORRY
user38: the way this proves that second red bull really was y/n's ...
user39: for real imagine loving a MAN so much you give it to HIM 🤮
user40: she also said in that recording at jos made it so bad for the two of them when they did compete that she no longer wanted to give the fans and the media the chance to do it either
charles_leclerc: oh wow that's crazy, you're my favourite woman ever
yourusername: don't be so rude to mama pascale
charles_leclerc: well other than mama obvioysly
yourusername: so i'm not your favourite, i see how it is
charles_leclerc: I AM SO CONFUSED SO I'M JUST GONNA SAY I LOVE YOU
yourusername: awww charlie i love you too
user41: okay i've known about them approximately two weeks and i love them your honour
maxverstappen1: i'm so much better than him y/n be real
yourusername: don't be such a sore loser maxy
maxverstappen1: don't get it twisted, i still won on track
charles_leclerc: not for long
yourusername: okay girlies leave the trash talk for the weekends this is being normal for the sake of y/n's mental health time
user42: good lord this trio is so dear to me
maxverstappen1
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 1,043,788 others
tagged: yourusername & charles_leclerc
maxverstappen1: best thing about winning is choosing the restaurant after - closely followed about the worst thing: third wheeling them.
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user43: max coming through with the y/n and charles content as he should
user44: i need him to open the vault cause i have not forgotten that y/n said this relationship is seven years old
yourusername: i think i had a wet dream about this sushi spread last night
maxverstappen1: as long as that's it, good.
yourusername: i don't need to have wet dreams anymore, the real thing is so much better
maxverstappen1: BLOCKED.
user45: i know y/n is elated to be able to publicly terrorise max with her relationship
user46: so does this mean that this is a system they've had for a while?
yourusername: room service is our middle names
charles_leclerc: maximilian can you please send the last pic to the shared album
maxverstappen1: on it 🫡
user47: SHARED ALBUM? I MIGHT DIE
yourusername: you two are such cutie patooties
maxverstappen1: but for real no being so cute on my jet again or just wait for me to go for my nap
charles_leclerc: heard and understood
yourusername: or maybe just get a life and stop being so lonely
danielricciardo: can i join for sushi or am i still banned?
maxverstappen1: eh, you could take y/n in a scrap
danielricciardo: she read my ass for filth on main i'm scared of her
charles_leclerc: she had you gagged
danielricciardo: and this litlle guard puppy agrees with whatever she says :(
yourusername: as he should !
maxverstappen1: don't try and fight it daniel, i've been in this losing battle for seven years
charles_leclerc
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liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,834,903 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: life in blue could never be blue with you. i love you baby, thank you for giving me this opportunity, every trophy is for you x
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user48: GOD PLEASE SAVE ME PLEASE GOD SAVE ME FROM THIS SINGLE LIFE.
yourusername: i love you too charlie, i'd do everything and more for you. i'm happy you're happy x
charles_leclerc: you can't get rid of me at this point
yourusername: seven years strong, i'm stuck to you like glue
charles_leclerc: you'll have my last name (or i can take yours) next
maxverstappen1: you can give her a ring but you'll NEVER TAKE THE VERSTAPPEN NAME AWAY
yourusername: you good?
maxverstappen1: yeah but we must always be double trouble. not even THAT man will come between that
user49: this is the trio of my dreams i need a whole drive to survive ep or even spin off just following these losers around
danielricciardo: see how could you be angry that i would want to talk about all this cuteness ?
yourusername: we are cute, correct.
charles_leclerc: i'd use the words incredibly sexy but okay
danielricciardo: are you guys still angry? I'M TRYING TO COMPLIMENT YOU
yourusername: we forgive you daniel.
charles_leclerc: i was also kissing her on my first podium REGARDLESS
yourusername: you're so romantic 🥰
maxverstappen1: GAG.
user50: convinced that max will still be the biggest big brother asshole until he is in the retirement home
alexalbon: flexing the alex albon and lily mun he photography i see
yourusername: thank you for your service
lilymunhe: we can also keep a secret 🤫
danielricciardo: I SAID I WAS SORRY
charles_leclerc: we're gonna hold it over you forever buddy
danielricciardo: was taking the red bull seat not enough?
charles_leclerc: until i win a championship? yes.
fin.
note: I'M BACK!! hope this was what you were looking for xx also, if you guys ever want to support me in any way i have a tip jar on kofi and also my small business @badlydrawnf1cats that has a sticker sheet available right now - love you all xx
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stevieschrodinger · 5 months
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Link to Part Two
Part One
Eddie stares down at the plastic doodad. It proudly declares the word ‘pregnant’ on the little screen, cheerily oblivious to the fact that it's just ruined Eddie’s whole fucking life. It’s a word as well, the actual fucking word, ‘pregnant’ shown oh so confidently on the little screen. Eddie’s done a test before, one time when he had a scare as a teenager, that had been the sort that showed one line or two.
One lines for not, two for...are. Two would have looked like prison bars, which would have been ironic given being saddled with a pup is probably pretty equivalent to 25 to life.
Anyway. Eddie shakes it. Looks again. Throws the fucking thing in the bin.
Well fuck.
Eddie contemplates, very very briefly, getting rid of it. His mind and body recoil from that thought the same way it would from, like, rotted tuna. Or someone else's puke. Or like...salad.
Eddie’s Omega’s got a lot of needs and no Alpha willing to fill them. Eddie gets by, fobbing his Omega off with with a couple of short term friends with benefits arrangements and the odd one night stand. Mostly his Omega can’t tell the difference between having an Alpha and having any Alpha, so he makes do. It scratches the itch.
Unfortunately, that means this pup could have been fathered by any one of three dudes, and Eddie doesn’t have a fucking clue which of them it would be. Eddie would really rather not it be Alpha A, Alpha B is a piece of work with a big dick, and what's behind door number three would be potentially catastrophic.
Anyway. Eddie makes a decision at two am in his apartment bathroom, and it starts with two text messages, an email, and a phone call.
“Thanks for doing this so on the spur man,” Eddie tells his landlord as he hands over the keys. Ex landlord. It was only a room in a shared place. Had to share the bathroom on this floor with two other dudes, but, meh. It had been perfect for what Eddie needed, and more importantly, within Eddie’s budget.
His whole life is sitting in the back of his van, barely filling a third of the back. Which is ideal really, made clearing out quick and easy and Eddie’s uncertain about weather or not he should be doing any heavy lifting right now.
He makes three stop offs before he leaves for good, shifting the very last of his product at discount prices. He mournfully throws in his last two boxes of cigs with the last deal; going cold turkey is going to be the opposite of fun, but Eddie’s in it to win it, and he’s going to try his best as of right now.
Wayne already has the door open when Eddie hops out of his van, beer in hand, eyebrow raised, “heya old man.”
When Wayne sees Eddie dragging bags out, he lifts the brim of his cap, puts it back again, and heads inside. Eddie sees him move a couple of things out of Eddie’s old room, and although it’s empty and the bed is stripped to nothing, it’s untouched, “how long you back for?” Wayne asks him, offering a beer.
Eddie looks at the offered bottle, dripping condensation, and very pointedly doesn’t take it “so, about that.”
There’s a long drawn out moment, and Eddie’s sees the realization dawn, “oh Ed.”
“You like kids!”
Wayne sighs, pulls Eddie into a hug, “I just hope they sleep better’n you did. Don’t think I can go through that again.”
Eddie snorts a laugh into Wayne’s shoulder, all relieved. He hadn't doubted for a second that Wayne would back his play, Wayne's always been unshakably team Eddie, but to hear it said in no uncertain terms is still a huge weight lifted.
Eddie’s got a slightest curve of a bump, small enough that it’s not nearly noticeable yet, especially with Eddie’s usual wardrobe. To go along with his bump, he’s got a scan booked at the Omega Health place, an insatiable craving for garlic mushrooms, and a job.
An actual honest job. Alright, a temp job, because he’s pregnant and no one in their right mind is going to hire a pregnant Omega for a full time permanent gig. So he is, conveniently enough, covering maternity leave for a beta girl at the record store. But that doesn’t matter right now, the moons aligned, and Eddie jumped at the opportunity. He’s going to have a secure pay check for the next seven or so months, and right this second, that’s what counts.
He can’t drink. He can’t smoke. He can’t do drugs and he’s most certainly not going to party. Eddie does the next best thing he can think of; he goes to the library. This is his reward now, his fun, his safe space; he’s going to reward himself with a good book. A good free book.
Turns out registering himself for a library card is a ten minute thing, and then he’s done, bit of plastic in hand, he wonders the shelves looking for the fantasy section. He rounds the corner into the main room only to find a dude reading and signing along to a bunch of little kids. He has the book propped up on a thing to keep his hands free and the pages open so the kids can see.
He’s encouraging them to sign along with a bunch of the words.
He has good hair...like, really good hair. There’s something familiar about the guy that Eddie can't place...until he does.
Holy fucking shit. That’s King Steve.
And he’s in a library...wearing fucking gold rimmed spectacles and a sweater vest.
And he’s hot. He’s still hot. He laughs at something and leans forward to help a toddler with the placement of her chubby little fingers and Eddie’s ovaries fucking explode.
He walks away. For self preservation he walks away. He forgets what he just saw because there was no way it was real. He’s been going through a dry spell, hasn’t got laid since he moved back to Hawkins and now he’s seeing mirages of his high school crush, that’s all.
That’s all it can be.
Until Eddie goes to the fancy scanner machine to check out his little pile of four paperback fantasy books and a deep Alpha voice is asking if he needs anything and he’s, like, right there. And he smells of library and Alpha and whatever nice thing he washes his fucking sweater vests in.
Jesus.
“No,” Eddie squeaks, “I’m okay.”
“Eddie?” Steve frowns at him, tilting his read and looking over the top of his glasses in a way that should be fucking criminal, “Eddie Munson right? I thought you moved away?”
“I have. Did. I mean, I did do that. Previously. Back now. Clearly.” Shut up shut up shut up and Steve can probably smell his embarrassment because he’s standing closely enough to clearly scent Eddie and Steve’s senses must be absolutely pinpoint because his eyes drop to Eddie’s stomach, then spring up to his neck. He frowns, like, the tiniest bit.
Eddie’s pregnant, and unmated, and Steve’s clocked that in about four seconds flat which, great. Humiliation complete.
But Steve’s face clears as quick as it had clouded, the whole thing passing so fast Eddie’s now not even sure he saw it, “so it’d been cool to catch up, you wanna wait a minute, I’m just about to have lunch?”
“Errr…I mean. I wouldn't want to impose or anything-”
“Steve!” And holy shit, if Steve is the ghost of Christmas past or some shit, the second ghost just rocked up in the form of Robin fucking Buckley of all people. Eddie doesn't even understand why they’re even friends, Steve was a topnotch jock and a total fucking dickwad, and Buckley was a band nerd.
This makes less sense than Steve’s sweater vest.
“Yeah, come on Eddie, lets go sit outside,” Eddie gets tugged along in their wake, somehow, and ends up sitting on a bench outside in the sun.
Robin had a bag of take out in her hand which she gives to Steve, and he takes out a carton of something that instantly makes Eddie’s mouth water, Eddie looks back up in time to catch Steve widening his eyes at Robin, tilting his head off to the side sharply in silent gesture for her to fuck off over there. She signs something, real quick. Steve nods.
Eddie doesn’t know a single lick of sign language, but he's pretty sure that even if he did, what happened was so fast he would have missed it anyway, “so, Eddie, great to see you, but I, shit, pretty sure I’ve left the...stove on.”
Eddie frowns at the take out and back to Robin but before he can point out what a steaming pile of bullshit that is, she’s already power walking off and shouting, “byyyyeeeeeeeeeeeee.”
“I, ah, got garlic mushrooms and broccoli and some stirfry-”
It’s too late for Eddie. He’s done. Stick a fork in him. He has no idea what’s happening here but he zones in on the garlic mushroom part of that like a heat seeking missile. A secondary part of his brain is screaming loudly that the Alpha has provided, the Alpha wants to share his food with Eddie. Alpha Alpha Alpha.
Eddie takes the container and the bamboo spork thing Steve hands him, “sorry, I never get chopsticks, no fucking clue how to use them.”
“I can show you,” Eddie says, without thinking it through or registering the implication or stopping to swallow, which means he just spoke with his mouth full of food.
“I’d like that,” Steve tells him, “when can I take you out for dinner?”
Which, Eddie’s brain does stall out there. Because. Well. Lots of things. But he was pretty certain Steve had clocked his specific circumstances earlier, but now he’s not so sure, “I’m pupped,” his mouth supplies without his permission, so he shoves a whole thing of broccoli in there to try and stop it happening again.
Steve hums, eating his beef thing very neatly, “no bite though,” he points out, and Eddie makes an agreeable noise, “maybe we can fix that,” Eddie nearly chokes.
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sanipoyo · 5 months
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THEIR LOVE LANGUAGE
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note - jujutsu kaisen, tokyo revengers, haikyu, fluff.
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PHYSICAL TOUCH, they’re so touch starved it’s insane. they don’t know how to keep their hands off of you. when you’re snuggled up with them caressing their cheek or massaging their scalp they feel so safe and loved. they love touching you and they love when you touch them.
- yuta, choso, todo, itadori, hinata, mikey, hakkai, kazutora.
ACTS OF SERVICE, they love doing things for you. cooking, cleaning, giving you a massage, you name it, and it’s done. when you have to lift a finger to do anything they feel guilty, endlessly offering to do it for you or at least, with you. they pay for everything, you don’t even get an opportunity to pull out your wallet because they’re quick to hand the clerk their credit card. they make sure that as long as your with them, you have not a worry in the world.
- nanami, maki, megumi, osamu, yamaguchi, kageyama.
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION, they practically worship you. they’ll flood you with compliments and praise. if you feel uncertain about something, they’ll reassure you. they know how to make you feel better about literally anything just by talking to you about it. bonus points for all the love letters they write for you and the paragraphs they send you when they leave out for work before you wake up.
- geto, akaashi, ushijima, mitsuya, shinchiro.
GIFT GIVING, they buy you gifts whenever they go shopping. you’re so stocked up on jewelry because they buy you new necklaces, rings, and bracelets all the time. every month you get some type of gift basket just because. no matter how expensive it is, if you want it, you’ll get it. they’re truly so grateful for the gifts you give them as well.
- kugisaki, kenma, atsumu, ran, draken, taiju.
PISSING YOU OFF, they love irritating you so much. they always make dirty jokes which never fails to win an annoyed glare from you, they absolutely love it. they love when you roll your eyes at their corny pick-up lines and dad jokes that they tell you every five minutes. when they’re being annoying and you start to ignore them and they get all whiny and clingy. you love them no matter how much of a nuisance they can be.
- gojo, kuroo, bokuto, hanma.
BEING MEAN TO YOU, they love you so much but those feelings are too overwhelming for them so they just pick on you. they’re so sassy, they always scoff at your comments, they’ll side eye you, and they’re sarcasm is unmatched. you always have to check their attitude although that doesn’t help at all.
- sukuna, toji, tsukishima, sanzu.
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Ⓒ all published work belongs to sanipoyo! do not copy/plagirize.
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sailing-ever-west · 2 months
Text
Thinking about how much the strawhats need Usopp.
His place on the team has always been weird and uncertain for him. He's a sniper but also he's an inventor and he fixes the ship but the thing he gets known for is mostly the long nose and the lying. He calls himself a great captain but he's not the captain and in fact he has very little decision-making power and even less actual confidence. He's the most cowardly. Or maybe he's the bravest. He's pretty sure they only keep him around because he helped them get a ship. He'd die for them anyway.
But the strawhats don't really need a sniper, or a liar, or a guy who gave them a ship. They need Usopp. And the reason has nothing to do with whatever his official role on the crew may be.
They need Usopp because they need a (goodhearted, clever, brave, talented, but nonetheless) regular guy. It's actually so important for the strawhats to have someone who knows what it's like to be weak, who has to really grapple with the consequences of every fight and crazy adventure, who has some semblance of being average and practical about things.
Nami shares some of this role of not being impossibly strong and unkillable the way the others are, but even she has solid close combat techniques and has random bursts of crazy where she'll do things like stab a 3 inch wide spike through her foot to win a fight and help Vivi. She's just pretending to be normal. You can see the glint in her eyes and know she's actually insane.
Also, Usopp is like. Actually nice to people. Regularly. He wants to avoid conflict. They desperately need at least one crew member who wants to avoid conflict. Nami does not serve this purpose quite like Usopp does, either. Sure, she doesn't want to get into fights willy-nilly and she'll often run instead, but she has a harsh and prickly personality that doesn't exactly set people at ease. Chopper also avoids fights but that's mostly for medical reasons and he has very little problem getting into them if he thinks it's necessary. Sanji is kind to people, but he's only nice to women, and will start fights with very little prompting. Luffy is friendly but completely tactless, Zoro doesn't even try to be sociable, and Robin thinks murder is a little funny. So again, between all these weirdos, they need a guy who's just like. Hey what if we said good morning like normal people. What if when some stranger is mildly rude and has a lot of weapons we just ignore it. What if we like. Got along with people. That would be neat.
Anyway I don't have a big grand finish for this post but just. The strawhats were genuinely in need of Some Guy, and Usopp solves that problem even though he thinks he's not special enough. Of course he's unique and talented and strong, but he's still an average human with average physical strength and slowly hard-earned skills. The strawhats without that have no tether.
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sunshinescribes · 8 months
Text
The House Always Wins
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Part 2 of this fic
Pairing: Sir Crocodile x Fem!Reader
Rating: EXPLICIT (18+)
Warnings: Possessive Behavior, Jealousy, Rough Sex, Cunnilingus, (lowkey) Sugar Daddy Crocodile, Crocodile is smug and petty
(edit: realized the original artwork was fanart and I couldn't find the artist's @ to credit them, so I changed it)
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Crocodile doesn’t know what to expect when he wanders onto the casino floor of Rain Dinners in search of you. Slot machines chime, playing a catchy little tune with each pull of the lever. Dealers grin and offer words of encouragement, coaxing big-eyed fools into another game with the sweet promise of lady luck’s favor.  
You don’t usually partake in gambling, not keen on the idea of betting away your berries when you know it’s all rigged—and why would you even need to? You never ask for anything, but Crocodile provides. Spoils you even.
He enjoys watching the way your eyes get all big, stunned by the diamond necklace he places around your neck, or the soft gasp that passes your lips when he gifts silk charmeuse and chiffon dresses, designed, and tailored just for you.
Crocodile continues to seek you out, his sharp eyes flitting between the slot machines and card tables. He ignores the curious and lingering looks targeted at him—the smartly dressed patrons who vie for his attention as he continues to search—and then he hears it.
Your laugh, loud and beautiful—music to his fucking ears. He turns.
Crocodile doesn’t expect to see you at the bar, perched on a stool, leaning into a man he doesn’t recognize. Your hand is on his slender arm, your lips pulled into a pretty smile, and laughter escapes again—so lovely and genuine and for someone else.
The man grins at you sheepishly, transfixed on your mouth. It’s so blatant—barely contained, the way he’s staring at you with a mix of adoration and lust.
You must feel Crocodile’s eyes on you because you glance over your shoulder suddenly. Your smile widens, and you exchange a quick word with the mysterious man before hopping down from your seat.
Crocodile is silent as you approach, stone-faced. You grab his arm with both hands and tilt your head towards the man, all while smiling up at him.
“I want you to meet my friend,” you say excitedly, steering him towards the bar.
Crocodile doesn’t catch the name that rolls off your tongue—he can’t seem to hear anything over the sudden ringing in his ears, so sharp it drowns out the sounds of the jingling slot machines and triumphant cheers of those foolish enough to think they’re the winners.
The fond smile that plays on the mystery man’s lip never falls, but Crocodile notices the sudden unease as the man’s eyes land on him. The imposing height, the cold, almost irritated expression he comfortably wears—the golden hook that glints under the blinding casino lights. It’s enough to strike fear in the heart of anyone smart enough to value their life.
And the man is a small thing—average in every sense of the word, Crocodile thinks. The plain clothes, the nervous, uncertain words that stumble from his mouth as he tries to introduce himself. Crocodile doesn’t feign interest—he barely even acknowledges your friend, and that only serves to add to his anxiety.
If it wasn’t for the pitiful look you shoot him, Crocodile would laugh at just how pathetic this man is.
“We both grew up in Coombe,” you explain, glancing back at the mystery man. “I never thought you’d leave the North Blue.”
He must take your surprise as a compliment because he gives you another bashful smile.
“I didn’t either. Guess I finally figured if you could do it, so could I,” he chuckles softly. “Imagine my shock when I saw you here, of all places.”
“Small world,” Crocodile chimes in dryly, drawing your friend’s attention once more.
Crocodile places a hand on your hip, drawing you a little closer to him.“She never mentions much about her home in the North Blue.”
And she never mentioned you. The insult is unspoken, so subtle that he thinks even you don’t catch it.
But it’s also true. You rarely spoke about the North Blue—of the life you had before you entered the Grand Line and ended up in Alabasta. You never mused over an island you once called home, or a lovesick, hairbrained boy you left on it, and Crocodile doesn’t pry. He isn’t particularly interested in knowing, truth be told. He only cares about the life you have now, with him.
The man goes on an excited tirade about how beautiful Coombe is this time of year, about how you used to love the new bloom after winter finally passed, and all the fun you both had in your youth. He can’t help but reminisce, tries to connect with you in the only way he’s able.
“You should visit when you can. Uh—you both should.”
You pretend to consider it, and Crocodile gives little more than an unaffected grunt.
You inquire how long he’ll be staying and recommend shops and restaurants he must visit before leaving. He shamelessly seeks more of your company—your attention—and asks if you could possibly give him a tour.
You promise to check your schedule and follow up, and he beams as if he’s won an invaluable prize. Crocodile’s irritation grows—twists and festers the longer he stands by your side, little more than an onlooker. His frustration isn’t directed at you—you’ve always been friendly, offering a smile where he would surely offer a sneer, but it doesn’t stop his grip from tightening on your hip.
You notice, finally excusing yourself. The man gives you both a soft goodbye, one that Crocodile ignores completely as he whisks you away, and he can’t help the way his lips pull into a smug grin at the quick glimpse of the dejected look on his face. It must hurt him to see you walk away in the arms of another—to know the golden opportunity he thought the world had provided him never existed at all.
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“You didn’t like him.”
It’s the first thing you say when you enter Crocodile’s private suite, disappointment dripping in your voice. You weren’t foolish enough to think he would be thrilled, but you thought Crocodile would at least be amicable. 
He shrugs his coat off, placing it on the coat hanger near the door. “He was shameless.”
Your brows furrow, your lips pull into a slight frown…You don’t know? It takes Crocodile by surprise; surely you must. The man is far too obvious; his intentions are impossible to mask.
“He would have taken you right there on the bar if you had let him,” Crocodile scoffs.
You blink, dumbfounded.
“Gage?”
So that’s his name.
Your voice comes out in a high-pitched squeak, taken aback by the sudden accusation. “He doesn’t want to fuck me.”
Crocodile gives a mirthless laugh. You’re so sweet. So naïve. Always offering others the benefit of the doubt.
Crocodile recognized the hunger in his eyes—the longing. He suspects this friend of yours has harped on you for a long time, never quite brave enough to take the chance.
Not even now. By some miracle, he survived the Grand Line, and he still can’t brave his own futile emotions. Crocodile isn’t sure whether to laugh at how spineless the man is or burn with anger at how he even thinks he has any chance of having you.
The dark, ravenous part of him takes high offense.  
Crocodile comes up behind you and dwarfs you with his body as his decorated hand cradles your jaw. “Course he does. Look at you.”
He tilts your head, forces you to face the full-length mirror on the opposite wall. You try to focus on your own reflection, but you can’t help but watch Crocodile when he dips down, pressing a tender kiss to your neck, all while his half-lidded eyes hold your gaze.
“Maybe I should invite him to our room so he can watch me fuck you,” he murmurs against your skin.
You shiver, nearly stumble out of his grasp as his lips trail higher.
“Don’t be cruel...”
Cruel? His offer would be courteous. It would be the closest your lovestruck friend would ever get to your naked form. The only way he would ever know what you sound and look like at the height of your pleasure—how perfect you are, stuffed and babbling through your orgasm.
The cruel thing would be what he truly wants to do—to use his devil fruit powers to turn the man into a withering corpse, forgotten in the endless sand dunes.
“Would you rather he joined?” Crocodile inquiries plainly.
He attempts to come off unaffected…curious, but the wicked voice in the back of his mind nags at him, hisses about feelings that could have been, and still may be.
The man matches your gentle nature, and is somewhat competent, at least to have made it this far from the North Blue. He’s the kind of man who would kneel at your feet if you asked, worship you as if it were his sole purpose—he’d give you a typical life, picturesque in its simplicity, and you would be content.
The thought makes something vicious twist in his gut. It makes time stand still as Crocodile awaits your answer.
“No.” You shake your head softly, meeting his cold eyes in the mirror. “I’ve never thought about him like…that.”
Of course not. What would you want with a sniveling worm? How could you go back to mediocrity after everything that’s been offered to you? The attention of a warlord of the sea—the savior of Alabasta. How could anyone else ever compare?
It’s pathetic how the gluttonous beast inside of Crocodile settles and hums contentedly, knowing that you only want him.
And maybe this is your power he couldn’t recognize before, why he was so unnerved in the beginning—this ability to effortlessly turn sensible men foolish. Even him.
“Only want you.” You turn, your soft eyes trained on him. “Always want you.”
Crocodile captures your lips as the words escape, and you melt into him—mold your body into his until he is all you sense. The heady scent of his sweet cigars mixes with hints of patchouli and cedar—his cologne—it lingers on his fitted clothes, drawing you deeper into his searing kiss.
You feel the bend of his golden hook press into the curve of your back, forcing you to curl into him as he parts your lips with his tongue. You’re caught in a pleasant haze, lightheaded, while Crocodile kisses you like he’s claiming your mouth, making sure that your lips never forget the feel and taste of him—that they never desire another’s.
Crocodile lifts you from the ground effortlessly with his ringed hand, still kissing you hungrily as he shifts blindly through his suite, knowing the layout well enough to stumble into his lavish bedroom. He parts from you with a low groan.
“Lay down,” he orders against your lips, and you comply, sinking into the soft mattress while he looms over you.
The ache you feel in your core blossoms—hurts so good from how desperately you want him—to be wrecked and teary-eyed and a mess for him.
You even go as far as to whine when you notice Crocodile isn’t working to free the fierce erection that strains his dress pants, eager to be lost in your warmth.
“None of that,” Crocodile tuts coyly, lowering to his knees near the foot of the bed. His large hand skims up the length of your thigh, pushing up your dress until it is bunched around your waist, and he can see the evidence of your arousal staining your thin lingerie—another gift.
That creature inside of him purrs gleefully, proud of how well he turns you into a spectacle—a gift of his own to admire and unravel again and again.
Crocodile tugs your panties down your legs, tossing it aside carelessly as his hooded eyes catch on your bare pussy, already slick and ready for him. A deep, guttural noise catches in his throat as you part your legs—eagerly welcome him where he belongs.
“I bet he wonders what you taste like…” Crocodile muses, leaning into your aching slit. A soft gasp passes your lips when you feel the heat of his mouth on your needy cunt, tending to the ache his salacious words and desperate kisses created.
There are rare moments when Crocodile takes you apart slowly, his movements languid and measured, bringing you to the height of your pleasure at an agonizing pace, only to rip it away just when you begin to tip over the edge. And then he continues the process again and again. He leaves you delirious on days like that, wasting the hours away with your body—and perhaps today would be a day such as that if he didn’t feel he had something to prove.
If the desire to plague your every thought didn’t control him like a cruel master.
Your soft whimpers turn to shameless, needy moans, light and airy but loud enough to satisfy the wicked parts of him.
“S’good,” you whine drunkenly, your hips bucking instinctively when Crocodile’s lips latch onto your neglected clit. Your fingers thread into his long hair, pull him even closer, and he groans—it makes you arch painfully as the feel of it cascades through your body and tickles your aching nub.
Each swipe of his talented tongue pushes you closer, making the heat that pools in your stomach metastasize until you’re chanting his name, so close and ready to reward him.
He squeezes your clit with his mouth, sucks your aching bud, and you’re gone—shoved over the edge as pure hot pleasure rips through you, flows from between your legs, and Crocodile laps up your sweetness like a starved man.
You glance down at him through your lashes, eyes heavy, body slowly recovering. Crocodile pulls away from your pretty pussy with a sigh, as if he’s sad to part, and the idea alone makes your core ache with newfound need.
“Always so sweet for me.”
Your release smears his chin. It makes him look depraved and delicious. If you had the energy for it, you’d lift from your spot on the bed and kiss him. Feel the taste of yourself on his tongue, but all you can do is watch him with tired eyes as he rids himself of his clothes, tosses his lavish vest and dress shirt aside haphazardly.
His pants are the last thing to go, and you watched as if caught in a spell, buzzing with anticipation as he palms his hard dick. It’s so pretty, with the tip blushing and spilling precum that glides onto his thick fingers. Crocodile smirks, amused by the enchanted look in your eyes.
“This what you want, darling?” he asks, giving his dick a rough tug that warrants a delighted hiss. You nod—nearly sob—as you continue to watch Crocodile’s hand rub up and down the length of his lovely cock. You feel so empty—the desire to be filled in a way only he’s capable of taking precedence in your mind.
“Tell me,” Crocodile encourages as he shifts to the bed, his large frame casting you in shadows as he hovers over you. That smug smile still plays at his lips and only grows crueler as he grinds his hard length against your needy cunt.
“N-need you. Fuck—need you so—so bad. Baby please—”
The request sounds pathetic, even to your own ears, but it must be exactly what Crocodile wants to hear because he sinks into you the second the term of endearment passes your lips.
A deep grunt rips from his throat and tickles your ear pleasantly as Crocodile drags his fat cock deeper into you. You’re so warm and wet and snug, your velvety walls hugging him like this is where he belongs—where he should always be.
And he’ll admit, there’s no better place than here, between your legs. No better feeling in the whole fucking world—not even the sweet giddiness that builds inside of him each passing day as the fall of the Alabasta Kingdom draws closer. Having you writhing beneath him, breathless and lovely, is incomparable—a sensation he never tires of.
“Always take me so—mmm…well,” Crocodile rasps, transfixed on how your sloppy cunt swallows him over and over and over again. It makes him fuck you harder; drive even deeper. “This pussy was made for me. You were made for me.”
And he thinks perhaps it’s the most honest thing he’s ever said to you. Uncertainty still stirs within him—dread lingers in the corner of his mind, silent and waiting, because you complicate everything. You’re the only person who can placate the ravenous creature within him, feeding its insatiable appetite without it ever growing incurious. It wants everything you have to offer—can’t conceive of feeding from anyone who isn’t you. Not anymore.
Never.
Crocodile pushes your thighs close to your chest, drives his dick even deeper as he continues to pound into you. The sound of his powerful thrusts and your tortured moans is a beautiful symphony, lovelier than the melodic sounds of the stirring sand at dawn.
You have that lost, blissed-out look in your eyes as you blink up at him, words completely evading you as he uses you.
How could your foolish friend ever even dream of having you like this? Think he could possibly do to you what Crocodile has done?
Crocodile feels equally as hopeless as you—is incapable of thinking clearly because a confession he knows he should swallow pours from his lips without warning.
“I’ll fucking kill anyone who tries to take you from me,” he growls, digging the tip of his hook into the mattress, inches away from your head.
You should be…shocked. Unnerved by such a confession. Crocodile doesn’t pretend to be a saint, but he never mutters his murderous intent. He hides behind practiced indifference; let’s others paint a glorious picture of him, never revealing his true nature. You attempt to feign shock for a split second, but you can’t help the way your pussy clenches around him and goes mad at his declaration—some depraved, feral part of you stirring to life.
And the knowledge that a part of you likes this fucked up part of him must awaken something in him, because his thrusts grow brutal, his balls slap against your ass as he fucks you into the mattress like it’s the last time he’ll ever get the chance to. Crocodile hits deeper, the head of his throbbing dick brushing against that sweet, spongey spot inside of you, and you’re gone before you can even warn him.
You choke out something that sounds like it could be his name, tears trickling down your cheeks as you come so violently that your breath stutters. You shake through your orgasm, squirm beneath Crocodile while he fucks you through it—watching you come apart with wicked fascination and unbridled lust.
He loves how he wrecks you—how you hold onto him for dear life, as if he might slip away.
He’s ruined you, just like you’ve ruined him.
The thought alone is the final push he needs, make his dick throb violently as he explodes inside of you and fills you up the way he knows you crave—the way your perfect pussy deserves. The squelch of his seed mixing with your sweetness is enough to drive him mad. Makes him want to fuck another load into you.
Maybe in a bit, he considers as he rocks his hips sluggishly, riding out the sweet aftershock of his powerful orgasm.
You’re little more than a quivering mess under him. Your eyes are closed, your breathing is ragged…so so beautiful, and Crocodile doesn’t frighten at the tender feeling that blossoms in his chest—a sudden warmth that takes him by surprise yet seems to make all the sense in the world as he stares down at you, all while a pleasant thought crosses his twisted mind.
What’s the harm?
Why shouldn’t I revel in what’s mine?
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divider credit @/cafekitsune
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