#then why Finn so uncertain?

[chirpsythismorning]

Milkvans complaining about bylers not mentioning Finn’s response about about the monologue is so funny, as if it didn’t support byler endgame even more 🤣

Finn saying I think he knows she thinks all this, bc I think there’s a reason why he says it, is because she— she— he’s been waiting to say it for a long time and she’s been waiting for him to say it for a long time. I think it’s an interesting thought, having that reciprocated. Yeah I think so. I don’t… I don’t know. I would hope… idk… great question and thought tho…

Like he literally cuts himself off before implying that Mike knows how El feels and that she wanted him to say I love you for a while, which is the very reason why he said it in the first place, despite seasons of attempting to say it, stalling repeatedly, only to fail each time up until now when there was literally no option not to in his eyes…

How is that a milkvan win?…

Not only that, but he didn’t make it sound hopeful for their future either. It’s still up in the air according to him. He makes a point of just saying interesting question over and over, only to not actually come up with an answer…

The assumption for many viewers, specifically milkvans, is that everything is great for Mike and El right now bc the monologue fixed everything. If that’s the case why does Finn end that question on a sort of question mark with it still up in the air? Least of all when you’re dealing with a queer ship on the other end, with him making much more of an effort to imply that it will be addressed. It’ll pay off vs. idk?…

This is like the casts reaction to the monologue all over again. The interviewer asked about Mike and El’s future and Finn basically danced around it saying he’s looking forward to all of their endings and is mostly interested to know if Mike will stay in Hawkins, adding at the end that he hopes Mike and El you know, find… happiness.

He’s always giving answers that work both ways. Byler endgame still fits in with whatever he says, whether milkvans want to acknowledge that or not.

Otherwise there would be no reason for him to try so hard to be ambiguous about Mike and El’s feelings, as if it’s this big spoiler… unless what’s about to go down is something most the audience won’t expect…

[inkdrinkerworld]

idk if you’ve ever seen my mad fat diary but finn reminds me so much of your james that it literally makes me SICK. if you’re interested, i implore you to think about james with a chubby and insecure reader where he basically has to spell it out that he likes them and then reaffirm it with his actions (brings you flowers, sweets, invites you to watch him play rugby, asks you to hang out with your friends). idk if you can work it in but there’s a line where the main character is like “you don’t have to kiss me because you feel sorry for me” and he responds like “i’m not kissing you because i feel sorry for you?? i’m kissing you because i want to” and that with james is so ajhhhhh

I haven’t seen it!!! Cw: insecure chubby!reader, negative self talk

James likes you. He’s liked you since you first transferred to his business class to make up credits for your semester.

He’s made it clear, in his mind, that he likes you by always saving you a seat next to him, and always having flowers on your desk every Monday.

You don’t seem to get it though.

You’re both in a ‘fight’ right now, James had asked you to come to his rugby game with his friends and you had asked him why he goes out of his way to be that nice to you.

“Because I like you,” he’d scratched his head when he said it. “I thought you realized that ages ago.”

You had shaken your head, “You don’t like me James, you think you do. I’m not your type.”

James had frowned after that, insisting you were wrong and you’d scoffed and said something about your being undesirable and James had left you standing in the hallway.

You haven’t answered his apologizing texts for leaving you in the hallway and not walking you back to your dorm.

Your brain hasn’t exactly caught up with the fact that James likes you. It feels unreal. James is fit, he’s got just about every girl on campus flocking to him. Him liking you feels like a cruel joke.

Still, you get off your bed and change into his rugby sweater and a pair of jeans and head to the pitch.

You reach there when they’re warming up and you can tell James is off. His runs aren’t as perfectly timed as they should be and his throws are short.

“James was worried you wouldn’t show.” Remus whispers as he and Sirius come to sit beside you.

You chew your lip and don’t tell them that you’d been thinking about staying home.

“He really does like you doll,” Sirius says and you roll your eyes.

“For now. It’s better for us if we just stay friends. He’ll find someone better to like soon enough.”

Remus tuts, “In James’ mind, there is no one better. He’ll wait for you forever, if that’s what it takes.”

Neither of them say anything after that and you’re left with your thoughts again.

You do like James. You’ve liked James before he started bringing you those flowers every Monday. You’ve liked him before he offered to walk you to your dorm one night and just always did it after that.

He’s easy to like, you come to realise, because he does everything with purpose but also like it’s second nature. Like being near you and making sure you get home safe is something he’s always done.

The game is scrappy and James’ team win by a messy touchdown. Even after the game he’s sulking so you walk down to the pitch to greet him.

“Hi Jamie,” you’re in front of him and even behind the helmet you can tell his eyes widen. “I’m sorry about earlier.”

James takes off his helmet and sets it on the turf. “I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to get upset, but you can’t speak about yourself like that to me.”

He closes some of the distance between you. “Did you really mean it? Do you really like me?”

James makes a pitying sound in the back of his throat as he hears how uncertain you sound. “Since you sat next to me wearing those silly socks with the bears on them.”

His hands are on your cheeks, cupping them gently. “You’re the most beautiful, kind, gentle, amazing, thoughtful person I’ve ever met. Of course I’d like you.” He confesses and you feel the pinpricks of tears in your eyes.

“I like you too James, but what if you change your mind? What if you find someone else to like this much?”

James scoffs. “There’s no one else. Only you.” His forehead presses against yours and his eyes close.

“You’re it for me,” he says and you gasp.

“James,” he cuts you off.

“I mean it.” He pulls away for a moment. “Can I kiss you now? You’re wearing that cheery lip balm that messes with me head.”

“You don’t have to kiss me because you feel sorry for me.“

James groans, long and drawn. “Baby, you gotta get that mess outta your head. I’m not kissing you because I feel sorry for you. I’ll never kiss you because I feel sorry for you. I’m kissing you because I like you, yeah?”

James waits for your soft, ‘yeah’ and then melds your lips together.

[helpimtrappedinthetextbox]

Clap

Well boys, time for a new Theory after episode 115 dropped

This one is gonna focus on Chip and a bit of the original version of the Prophecy

Warning of spoilers and unhinged thought process, read at your own risk

For this post imma be focusing on a line from the Prophecy. Which would be:

"The seal remains locked by a Key of Divinity"

So I ask you:

How does Chip know Celestial?

Why was he Welcomed Home in that place?

What is the secret of himself that not even he knows?

He is the key. It's why in the one shot, Chip being grabbed was specifically mentioned. Why Niklaus felt the need to make a deal with Chip that would land him directly in the Hole in the Sea.

Now, fair warning, I do believe that Niklous would be fully aware of such a moment and set the board for this eventually. The why is the only thing I am uncertain about, I have my thoughts but that's a theory for another time.

He was Welcomed Home because that was where he would always end up, it was the place he would always find his way to. You could even say, it was the place he was Destined to be.

Now, here is where it all gets a bit more nuanced...

I believe there to always have been someone who was a Key of Divinity. When the last dies, a new one is born. (Basically an Avatar situation)

However the reason it is only just now happening is because it's only now that the stars have aligned to allow whatever has been locked away to be unleashed.

The key has always been born on a different plane, whatever was locked away was not strong enough in it's prison to reach out for the key, and it hadn't been arms reach.

Until Chip.

Chip has been the first to meet all the qualifications. And Niklous nudged Captain Rose to head that way for their last Journey, for Chip to get grabbed. However there was unexpected interruptions, in the form of Arlin, Drey, and Finn.

So Niklous would have to rearrange the board to get Chip once again where he needed to be.

And now he is.

And it may be too late.

[bellamyblake]

Fine by dusk

Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Smut, Angst, A/busive Relationships, veteran Bellamy working construction, Nurse Clarke;

Words: 15,415

Bellamy and his contruction crew are hired to fix the Griffin manor's back porch and garden. Clarke's stuck in an abusive marriage with Finn who's dream is to have the perfect family life so he could rise through the ranks, become mayor, then perhaps even senator and he doesn't care what he has to do to get it. Meanwhile Clarke feel sad and uncertain of what is even happening to her anymore. That is until she lays eyes on Bellamy Blake.

Bellarke Christmas exchange, written for @dark-scape

"I love it." she admitted "Used to want to go to art school."

"Why didn't you?" she shrugged and looked down at their hands that were so close to each other that all she wanted to do was take his fingers in hers and never let go of them.

"I don't know...mom wanted me to go to medschool and I did grow to love being a nurse."

"But your true passion is drawing?" she hummed and he picked up her chin with his hand, putting their faces really close to each other again. "You should keep up with it."

"I only started drawing again recently." she didn't tell him it had all to do with him but judging by the cocky smile he got on his face, he read right through her.

"Oh yeah? Was there any reason why?"

"I got inspired again." she admitted and decided to tease him as she pushed closer and now their noses touched while her hand reached over to his middle where she put the stethoscope earlier. He reached to put his beer aside and take his leg off the table too, coming in even closer to her. Two could play this game and she was intent to show him that.

"By what?" he asked and she smiled as she snuck her hand under his shirt for a brief moment and grazing his ribs with her nails. His stomach jumped, so did his dick in his pants that were getting really thight for him.

"I have no idea." she said innocently as she pulled away and made his breath hitch again. "What about you? Any passions?" she picked up the plates from the table and went to the sink where she threw away whatever was left in them and turned the water on. Bellamy wasn't stupid-he understood the signs clearly, she wanted this as much as he did and they were simply fooling around right now, playing their game.

He got on his feet and limped to the counter where he leaned on it from behind and trapped her so that she couldn't move. He leaned into her ear and whispered.

"War. I've always been good at it." he admitted. Her breath hitched and she dropped the plate she was holding as the water kept beating on it. When he pushed a bit harder from behind her, rubbing his half-hard dick against her butt, she gasped and he reached to tuck a strand of hair fallen on her cheek, behind her ear. "That and...history. Writing. I like that."

"So you're a writer?"

"Used to be. Overtime I just got better at holding a rifle as I said. Some people may find it to be fucked up but..." he let his hand fall to her side and he quickly snuck it under her arm, so he'd be able to cup her breasto over her thin shirt and make her move on her toes and press hard against his body.

"It isn't." she looked back at him and he smiled at her as he looked down on her. With his good hand he reached out and turned the tap off, then he placed it on her lower stomach, close to her crotch and pushed her harder against his body, rubbing his dick up and down her crack a little without breaking eye-contact with her. "Maybe you should pick it up again." she offered, gasping for it. Her hand flew to his wrist, desperate to hold onto something and he just smiled devilishly again. She hadn't felt that hot and aroused in...maybe ever, she was already pathetically dripping in her panties, so bad, she just wanted to touch herself and his cock pressing against the crack of her ass made it worse despite the fact that it was all happening with their clothes on.

"I don't know...I found a new hobby lately. I think you and I share it." he whispered as his other hand worked to find her nipple and pinch it between his fingers while his other hand went lower to cup her crotch through her jeans. She wasn't sure if he could feel the wetness there already but his eyes widened a little which meant he probably could.

"What's that?"

"Undressing at the window every night and making me go crazy about you." he whispered before he finally leaned down and kissed her.

Clarke lost any ground she had and almost collapsed in his arms-this felt like nothing she's ever done. His lips were so soft against hers and his tongue didn't just move uncomfortably in her mouth, desperate to do something like Finn's did, no...he just kissed her slowly, wanted to become one with her and allowed her the chance to also take charge if she wanted, which she did.

[thranduel]

mike’s letter to will?

“something is coming…” is the first line in the entire show that mike says while they’re playing d&d…

then this was posted a few tweets down in response and the date says november 6th, 1983

what if the letter was actually written on that day from mike to will because he loves him and he’s so special to him but he never got to give it to him? what if that’s why mike was more distraught and heartbroken after seeing will’s body and the show purposefully focused on his reaction as he cried into his mother’s arms? and remember they actually filmed finn crying his eyes out while riding his bike away and they said it was one of the best scenes but they cut it? why would there be so much focus on mike and will’s relationship but not the others? there’s so much more going on here

and maybe mike and will wrote each other letters a lot as kids and sent them to each other? maybe mike wrote that after the boys left his house in episode 1 and wrote something like “anyway i think you’ll love the rest of what i planned for the campaign. sorry i couldn’t get it done tonight but you mean so much to me and it’s been so fun playing with you guys. hope this is something we can do together for the rest of our lives and it will last until we’re old. love, mike.” this would be such a beautiful and incredible parallel because in 3x03 during their fight, mike says “i mean what did you think, really? that we were never gonna get girlfriends? that we were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?” but will never actually implied that or said those words specifically, so imagine if mike used the words he wrote in his OWN letter to will years ago because he was projecting and struggling with internalised homophobia?? also will said “yeah, i guess i did. i really did” and then in 4x08, he talks about wanting to play nintendo and d&d for the rest of their lives. ALL OF THIS WOULD CONNECT SO BEAUTIFULLY AND IT WOULD MAKE SENSE

OR even if the letter wasn’t written on that exact day, that’s probably when they’ll find it when they’re in the upside down in season 5 because time is frozen on that date. it’ll probably be in mike’s basement or bedroom. maybe that’s another reason why mike struggled to write “love, mike” on eleven’s letters because he knows he did it for will and will is the one he truly loves, but he’s just so afraid and uncertain of everything. that’s also probably why he couldn’t send will letters because he was scared. because why else would you lose contact with your best friend? why couldn’t you send him letters when you sent your girlfriend letters? it could’ve easily been done but he purposefully avoided it and then later on admitted he was afraid to lose him. in eleven’s letter, she said will has been acting “weird” because there’s someone he likes. then when mike is talking to will, he says the past year has been “weird” without him. they both also admitted to pushing each other away out of fear of losing each other (mike says it in 4x04 and will says it in 4x08). why are they acting so weird all of a sudden if they’re “just friends”?

if this letter is from mike to will, it would be the perfect way to reveal that they’ve loved each other from the very beginning. the general audience will see it and realise time was frozen in the upside down and it’s an old letter that mike wrote years ago. then no one can say it “came out of nowhere”. they have the perfect opportunity to do this right!

[anthurak]

WIP - Finding Your Missing Problem

So doing that one post earlier today got me thinking...

What if Marceline actually FINISHED singing 'I'm Just Your Problem' instead of choking at "Why do I want to...?"

As in, what if we, and more importantly Bonnie, heard what Marceline REALLY wanted? XD

---

The growing lights become a crescendo as the sealed doors of the Door Lords practically explode in a cloud of glimmering sparkles rising up before descending down into the canyon.

And at the center of it all, bathed in a shower of shimmering fractals of light in front of the now-open gateway, floats Marceline the Vampire Queen.

“Oh my glob Marceline! That was AMAZING!” yelled Finn the Human in abject awe as he ran up to the entrance to look up to the floating vampire.

“Yeah! That door said we needed a band, but you busted that thing open all on your own!” Jake the Dog added as he also ran up to join his younger brother.

“Yes! You have proven yourself far superior to our lacking musical talent.” Added BMO.

But Marceline didn’t seem to hear them, or even register what she just accomplished.

She was breathing heavily, her face now drenched in sweat from an exhaustion that wasn’t physical. Her axe that she once held tight as she played her song was supported only by its strap over her shoulder, her arms now hanging limp at her sides. Even her normal energetic floating was now entirely still.

And she wasn’t looking at Finn, Jake, BMO or even the brilliant shower of lights falling around her.

Instead her gaze was locked squarely on the pink-haired, pink-skinned gum princess sitting shock-still on a rock. Whose own gaze was locked squarely back at her. One wide-eyed pair of eyes staring right into another.

Then the pink girl got to her feet.

The princess walked forward in a slow, almost uncertain pace and the vampire queen drifted slowly downwards.

All the while their shared gaze never breaking.

“Come on Princess! Let’s go get our… stuff. Princess?” Finn spoke up, only to trail off as the princess walked right past him without so much as an acknowledgement.

It seemed in this moment, Bonnibel Bubblegum was focused just as absolutely on Marceline Abadeer as the other was on her. Completely unaware and uncaring of anything except each other.

After what was in reality just a few moments but which probably felt like an eternity to the pair, Marceline’s feet finally came to rest on the ground and Bonnibel’s feet came to a halt. The two now directly facing each other so close that the princess’s crown was bumping into the wide brim of the vampire’s hat.

Both of their gazes still locked firmly on the other’s, both of their faces in an unreadable expression, though for entirely different reasons.

Marceline’s face was an unreadable mess of emotions. Shame, longing, guilt, nostalgia, anger, affection, fear, and so many others.

Bonnibel’s face by contrast was an unreadable blank. A complete neutral seemingly devoid of anything.

The pair continued to stare into each other’s eyes for a couple more moments as the shower of lights fell around, which must have felt like another eternity for them. Entirely unaware and uncaring of anything but each other.

Until…

“Bonnie,-MMPH” Marceline spoke while Bonnibel acted.

Bonnie lunged forward, smashing her lips in Marcie’s own, so hard and so fast she knocked her own crown off on Marcie’s hat.

And despite any surprise, it was only after the barest of split-seconds of hesitation that Marcie was smashing her own lips back into Bonnie’s JUST as hard.

Mouths opened, teeth banged together, tongues met and hands began to hold fast to each other as Marcie and Bonnie KISSED.

----

There will certainly be more XD

(To be clear, I have no intention of posting full fics here. Completed stories will still only be going up on my AO3 page.)

[spicybylerpolls]

i'm still laughing at that one anon's post 'have we gone back in time? is this an evangelical youth group? is this catholic school? are we mormons?'

hahhahhahaha! the cadence, the rhythm of the sentences: pure poetic comedy. stand up gold.

special mention to mormon suzie - did she sniff out byler? special mention also to finn wolfhard's catholic school upbringing, because that sure brings some spice to his whole Thing, and surely mike's Thing too.

so I wanted to add on that i think much of this fear of byler x sex is about control. a large amount of young byler fans on here are swifties. now, t swift is v popular with young people, but many of her lyrics are also highly sexual. she's so huge that i think there must be a huge proportion of young fans who choose to ignore her spicy lyrics and just dream romantically instead. i mean, as a kid, i used to just accept all the boy band gyrations and the very suggestive lyrics. they meant nothing to me yet, so i just sang and moved on.

am i saying all vanilla bylers are swifties? not at all. im saying that there may well be a large proportion of bylers who are still teens, or who grew up WITH these actors, and are coming to terms with their own sexuality, and therefore experiencing shame, just like mike and will. so they lash out.

after all, coming of age is a time of losing control. and if you view adults/people more settled than yourself who are happily comfortable with their sexuality, and you aren't, well... many people would get defensive.

and after all, sex itself is about ceding control. not necessarily losing control - although that can be fun too - but certainly feeling free enough to let go. and that's something you have to learn.

if this hasnt been encouraged in your life, and a comfort show that has been 'yours' for years is starting to pull away from you... well i can see where the fear comes from. it's manifesting as hate towards us proud spicy bylers, but it's fear.

i'm not condoning it, merely trying to understand. tbh, i love this blog and this side of byler tumblr so much that it doesnt bother me anymore. i just find it all fascinating, and cannot wait for s5. bring on spicy byler for real! its gonna be surreal after so long spent fantasising

hehe

very interesting points! I agree that fear may be a very big part of it for some! It's "safer" in some respects to just view Byler and these characters in a romantic light instead of considering the spicier side of things and how that might intersect with the show's themes. A lot of people almost seem to believe that sex or even exploring Mike and Will's sexual attraction for each other would corrupt the purity of the ship, which is obviously untrue. But if people can't see those two sides as linked, it does make sense why they'd get defensive. Raw sexuality can absolutely be scary and uncertain and messy for sure.

[buffshipper8490]

Rated Mature

Chapter Summary

The Resistance attempts to sabotage the Kuat Drive Yards to undermine the First Order...

Excerpt

“You said two days; I’ve been here two weeks,” said Rose accusingly.

Finn grinned at her and they shared a brief kiss. “This place doesn’t seem so bad.” "Good people, terrible food," Rose countered, sticking her tongue out in a "bleh!" All business now, she then unfurled a canvas map on the main worktable, the ends curling off the edge. It was the surface of the planet, the migrant colony they were currently standing in marked by a giant square, the surrounding landscape dotted with factories and settlements between large swaths of forest. “This is our access point,” Rose continued, pointing to a circle simply labeled SHAFT. She placed a small holochip over the mark. With the flick of a switch, the Orbital Ring flickered to life in holographic form, the massive powershaft that connected it to the planet lining up perfectly with the marking. “This powershaft delivers raw ore to the Orbital Ring," she explained. "A detonation directly into the energy stream, here, will cause a chain reaction-” She hit another button and a small red dot traveled up the shaft and triggered a series of explosions that decimated the entire ring. Poe blinked as holographic debris floated through the air. “--and take the whole thing down.” “Along with their new fleet,” added Finn, eyes trained on the hole in the ceiling and the Orbital Ring beyond, where a dozen Star Destroyers were fueling up. Poe was still uncertain. “How do we know they haven’t detected BB-8’s signature up there? The alien baby started to cry. Rose picked up a rattle and began to shake it to soothe the child. “I doubt you would have gotten this far if they were on to us," she said, as if attempting to soothe Poe too. "There’s just a lot we don’t know,” said Poe, crossing his arms and starting to pace in the cramped little room. "That’s why I voted for the other plan." There were too many variables, far too many ways for this to go wrong. If experience had taught him anything, it wasn't to go rushing headlong into anything. That's how people get killed. That's how fleets were lost: in irrelevant bombing runs on Dreadnoughts or misguided mutinies. Finn’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “This is when we second guess the plan? Right now?” Rose stuck a finger into the alien baby’s mouth. "We can take out the enemy’s fuel source and be lightyears away before they know what hit them." She looked to Poe, eyes determined in the light of the hologram. “But we have to move now.” Finn and Poe watched as the baby contentedly sucked Rose's finger. That's why they were fighting. So a baby like that one could have a future of freedom, a future free of fear and oppression. Poe looked skyward again, the sight of all those Star Destroyers and what their plan-- if successful-- could do to put them out of commission strengthening his otherwise shaky resolve. “Okay, let’s blow this thing and go home.”

Likes ❤️ and Reblogs 🔁 are much appreciated!

[gmariam19]

Well, I'm still working on the other fic snippet I shared-just need those last few lines that wrap it up. So I started another one-shot, the angry one. It's named Shouty Fic on my desktop, so I should probably start thinking about a better title. It's one of those fics I could probably tweak forever but that I will eventually have to stop editing and rewriting and just post. They are almost done arguing, so maybe I'll actually be able to post one of them this week! In the meantime, here's the opening to the Shouty Fic. Thanks for reading!

***

The meeting finally ends, and everyone slowly files out of the new command center. Except Finn. Finn, who had missed the holo-call with the representative from Akiva. Finn, who looks both apologetic and apprehensive. Finn, who Poe misses so much but can’t bear to look at right now, because he is so close to the tipping point. He begins gathering his things, waiting for Finn to speak first, half hoping he doesn’t.

“Look, Poe, I’m sorry,” Finn starts. He’s said that a lot lately. He’s been working hard, Poe knows that. They all have. Finn is learning about the Force, he’s helping Jannah’s company settle former troopers surrendering across the galaxy, and he’s trying to be the co-general he said he would be. Only he’s gone more than he’s not, and Poe is usually general on his own. He misses those first heady days and weeks when they really did lead together, make decisions together. Celebrate every small victory together. He sighs, his earlier anger dissipating into the smothering disappointment he feels most of the time now.

“It’s fine.” Poe turns away, sensing that Finn wants to say more, but determined to avoid the confrontation that’s been brewing for weeks. “But I’m tired, so I’m going to bed. Big meeting coming up.” He didn’t want to go to Akiva to help set up a peacekeeping force, but perhaps it would be good to get away, and at least he might see Wedge and Nora.

“Wait,” Finn says, and Poe can sense the other man’s frustration, which only adds to his own. Finn is standing in the middle of the room, his shoulders tense, his eyes uncertain. “I want to talk about it. We need to talk about it.”

“We?” Poe echoes, turning around with an air of frustration. He’s been having an even harder time than usual controlling his quick-trigger responses, at least when it comes to this. To Finn. “What do we need to talk about?”

“We need to talk about this trip, for one,” Finn replies. “But mostly about us. Why this is happening.” He motions between them. “Why we barely talk, why you’re always so mad at me, why—”

“The trip was already discussed at the meeting. And we don’t talk because you’re not around.” Poe is blunt. Maybe it’s not the whole truth, but it’s the biggest part of it. Finn is simply not there anymore. “That’s why. And I’m not mad, Finn. I’m tired. Literally and figuratively in every sense of the word.” He’s more disappointed than mad, though when he thinks about why he’s disappointed, then he gets angry. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be, after the war.

Finn narrows his eyes, shakes his head. “Look, I’m know I’ve been busy, but you have too—”

“I’ve been doing my job,” Poe snaps. “The one I inherited three months ago when Leia died. The one I thought you were going to be a part of, that we were going to do together.” He wasn’t going to go there, but now that he has, maybe it will help him with the deep resentment that has been building for weeks as they drift farther and farther apart. Maybe he should have said something a long time ago.

“I am!” Finn exclaims. “I am a part of it.”

“Doesn’t feel like it. You’ve spent the last three months doing more Jedi training, more trooper support, than—you know, It’s fine.” Poe waves it away. He suddenly doesn’t want to get into it anymore, it’s too much. Easier to bottle it up, like he has been. “We’ve managed, so let’s just forget about it. I’ve got to get ready for Akiva.” The unspoken alone hangs in the air between them.

The look on Finn’s face is confusion crossed with hurt, which doesn’t do anything to lessen Poe’s resentment. What doesn’t the other man understand? Poe has been handling almost everything on his own while Finn trains and travels and occasionally checks in. Finn missed the entire meeting on the upcoming conference on Akiva, when Poe had expected him there. Of course Poe is upset. Then Finn opens his mouth and throws guilt into Poe’s mix of complicated and overwhelming emotions.

“You said you were happy for me,” he says quietly. “That you understood—why I wanted to learn about the Force, why I wanted to work with Jannah. You said you were proud.”

“I was,” Poe says, and Finn’s face falls. Misstep, and he feels bad, he does. No matter what Poe may be going through, he doesn’t want to lash out and hurt Finn. “I am—although sometimes it’s hard. Finn, I do understand, but understanding doesn’t make it any easier when half the galaxy is still putting out the fires of the First Order and the other half is riding my ass about what happens next! I’m tired!”

“You keep saying that,” Finn points out. “But I think you mean something else.”

[upper-sixth-fanclub]

Has your muse ever felt torn between what their society / culture expects from them and their moral values? What did they decide to do about it?

Has your muse ever faced any kind of discrimination or oppression for an aspect of themselves that they cannot change? How has this experience shaped their attitude toward that aspect of themselves? Have they ever perpetuated any kind of discrimination or oppression against others, whether unintentionally or deliberately?

Hello, thank you for the ask. I appreciate your patience as I saved this one; it helpfully serves to recalibrate my muses.

CW for child sex work, child assault, sexual assault mention, and ableism.

Classic Literature Asks

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn: Has your muse ever felt torn between what their society / culture expects from them and their moral values? What did they decide to do about it?

Absolutely. Ume's tragic death was because her job's expectations were in conflict with the morals that Gyutaro raised her with. We're left with the vague story that Ume assaulted a samurai, but I'm sure a lot of people got the impression of Ume resisting sexual assault, leading up to her stabbing the guy's eye out. I think there's also room for interpretation, but even if she was strong-arming or demanding payment up front or whatever, that doesn't erase the fact she's a child sex worker. She was vulnerable to societal expectations and had little autonomy over her situation: I think whether Gyutaro had taught her to live that way or not, she loves him enough to idolize and mimic his behavior anyway. She was doomed to take action, and doomed to be targeted for it.

Gyutaro's way of defying societal expectations was to lean into the bit until it broke. After a childhood of being kicked around and abused, Gyutaro knew he was expected to just suffer and die. It was when Ume was born that he felt he needed to stay alive, and of course, her beauty made him feel a vicarious pride because he suddenly 'had' something that everyone else could want. (Classic time-appropriate misogyny.) I think his violence and aggression as retribution was inevitable, given it was all he knew. He was treated like trash, and so he came out trashy and messy and mean. Sort of an inverse of Ume, who wasn't expected to be violent, and so the price she paid for her actions was much steeper than Gyutaro faced.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame: Has your muse ever faced any kind of discrimination or oppression for an aspect of themselves that they cannot change? How has this experience shaped their attitude toward that aspect of themselves? Have they ever perpetuated any kind of discrimination or oppression against others, whether unintentionally or deliberately?

Points directly at Gyutaro. I know I harp on and on about the stigma of sex related diseases IN the field of sex work, especially the stigma against those with syphilis. Gyutaro's mother was likely the target of a lot of this discrimination too, as workers with syphilis were seen as dirty and immoral, which contributed to her lashing out on her own son, because how dare he be the living embodiment of her problems. It was a structural issue of hurting the people who needed help, and Gyutaro was absolutely oppressed by a form of ableism.

Obviously, this made him hateful and twisted. And while everyone has varying headcanons as to how much he cares about his appearance, I'm always a fan of uncertain sensitivity, as if he's only JUST wading into his low self-esteem, but hasn't really delved into the why and how. It still bothers the hell out of him, but he pretends it doesn't by using his 'ugliness' as his weapon. That's where he was mentally when he died, and where he stubbornly refuses to move from. He had nobody but Ume to confide in-- and even his vulnerabilities weren't really addressed, given their mutual worldview of beauty as power.

In this way, he perpetrated his own discrimination too: by validating the way he was treated and resenting it at the same time, by minimizing all of it to 'those who take win, the bullies are the winners,' he trapped himself in an unwinnable mindset. He can't reflect on himself as anything but a loser-turned-winner, because being a victim of all that doesn't matter to him now that he's attained power for himself and Daki.

I think this same argument can apply to Daki as a sex worker, too. At first, it was the only career path really available to her, given their location and status in life. And as a vulnerable kid, it's unlikely she WASN'T exploited for the gain of others. Women and children as property is still a mindset that's being deconstructed today, so I love that she told Zenitsu so blatantly that especially in the Entertainment District, people ARE products to her. She's a classic example of perpetrating further oppression; now that she's a demon, she could choose to do ANYTHING and her brother would go along with it. But she chose to become an oiran and to keep the human populace under her heel, hurting women and children the same ways she was once hurt.

[wolfwrenbrainrot]

All the thoughts I ever had about SW ship wars from 2015 to 2023?? And why I ship Wolfwren I guess Idk

⚠️ DISCLAIMER ⚠️

I’ll be discussing the ship wars that are happening right now in the ahsoka fandom and compare it to how my perception about the fandom war that happened during the sequel era changed with the years). Oh, and I’m going to get into some tangencies that may not make much sense most of the time, so reading this to the end is on your own account. I ended up being a bit cynical too, but not in a mean way, I hope?

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I usually give up everytime I start writing an opinion on tumblr, because most of the time I just think my opinion won’t change anything, but the ahsoka fandom got “revived” (not that it was dead, but, well, we haven’t had any new episodes and to an extent the most of us move on to others shows a little until we get new content, like it happened these last few days) and I’ve been thinking about this show all on my own for a while (my friends aren’t really into Star Wars stuff, so they can listen, but they’ll never GET IT like interacting with fans online will). I’m explaining myself too much, but all I mean by that is that by writing this, I don’t intend to add fuel to the fire. That’s why i won’t tag sab//ra, r//lo or mention the ships just because I don’t want to upset those of them that can have normal conversations about media nor trigger those that can’t (which, thankfully, doesn’t seem to apply to all sab//zras). So, if you don’t like Wolfwren, you’ll only see this if you are looking for a ship you don’t like or if you’re invested enough in not liking it to check the anti tag. I’m not judging, we all been there. In fact, I was there during the sequel era, with a ship that is pretty similar in dynamic to Wolfwren. It was also pretty similar to a ship I loved at the time, Catradora, from Netflix’s She’ra. So, yeah, I was a big hypocrite. I still kinda think sapphic enemies to lovers is the superior taste of the trope, but that’s because I’m so profoundly gay it would scare the gayest gay, so obviously the ships I’m more invested in are sapphic. It’s a given. But my point is, now I see the whole R//lo argument from a different angle, that you can disagree with, but I believe is more realistic:

I don’t ship it.

Although it is an illusion to believe our taste in fiction is not related to who we are as people (because blah blah blah capitalism blah blah blah I’m a commie), it is possible to distinguish what we want from two fiction characters and how we expect to meet our partners in real life lmao.

(This next part I’m a bit uncertain of how it’ll be perceived, but I hope it makes sense. Please, both R//los and antis that may or may not be reading this, be patient and try to understand what I’m trying to say.

Yes, Finn was casted aside by Lucasfilm. Yes, K//lo getting a more prominent role in the films played a part in this whole process. Yes, there was a part of the R//lo fandom that was racist to John Boyega. This is also true for the Star Wars fandom as a WHOLE, because there was plenty of shitty dudebros complaining about the same shit they’re complaining today, “woke culture” and all that crap, just because they decided to have a woman and a black man as the protagonists. A decision that most likely wasn’t made by those executives thinking: “Oh, wouldn’t it be so great if we made a few minorities feel seen in this universe many of them really love?”. But it did that.

The Force Awakens came out and, despite being, at the same time, a remake of A New Hope and a continuation of Return of the Jedi, its new characters had SO. MUCH. POTENTIAL. And, limitations imposed by mainstream products made by big corporations and set in galaxies far, far away from ours aside, black people and women felt represented. It is one of the many contradictions of symbolic effect of minorities groups being represented in media produced in the system that oppress them (commie, warned you). Does it change things? No, not really. Isn’t it usually done it a way full of limitations that sometimes reinforce certain ideas that are pretty harmful? Yeah… Kind of… But didn’t it feel great, after growing up frustrated that Leia wasn’t a Jedi in the old movies, to have Rey? Wasn’t it awesome that black people got Finn? This complex (at least, it started that way) defected stormtrooper turned rebel? That could, maybe, even be force sensitive…? Yes to all of those questions! Tricky, isn’t it? By the way, I do believe that (before TROS) Finn had the narrative placement of Han (reluctant hero), Poe had Leia’s (rebel leader that gets captured and literally puts important information in a droid lmao), Rey had Luke’s (lives a boring life but has a calling to the adventure blah blah blah becomes a hero, we all heard it so many times) and Kylo had Vader’s (villain that’ll eventually get redeemed by the hero). All basic, old hero’s journey. A story structure that, despite being critical of, I eat up every fucking time it envolves spaceships and lightsabers. Getting back to the point, representation has its limits but it matters and the Star Wars fandom is full of racist, sexist pieces of shit and there was a percentage of the R//lo fandom that were too. But shipping R//lo isn't, like, intrinsically racist. You can make an argument for the implications of Adam Driver being chosen as a romantic interest (both by many fans and by Lucasfilm) over John Boyega, but at the same time there is, to some degree a level of which trope (friends to lovers or enemies to lovers) attracts you more. For me, it depends. I was a Finnpoe with a soft spot for Finnrey and an anti R//lo. But I’m obsessed with Wolfwren. Guess I like non-menacing men and evil lesbians. Wonder why Ezra Bridger is my favorite Rebels character and I ship Wolfwren. 🤔

Going back to the “Opinion on R//lo checklist”:

Would I like to meet my future partner by being kidnaped? No, not really. Do R//lo shippers want that? I think it's pretty safe to say they don't, even if they joke about it as much as I do about wanting Shin Hati to stab me. Because, ohh, right, it's a fictional movie about spaceships, galatic wars and space wizards. Yeah, I totally forgot about that when I was younger.

So, shipping R//lo doesn't mean you condone abusive relationships or domestic violence or whatever. Same applies to Wolfwren. ‘Cause, like, they aren't in a relationship yet, they’re not even friends or allies… They're on opposite sides of a war. You’re supposed to try to kill each other. Some people are just intrigued by the tension/dynamic between two characters and some others are just attracted to the characters and want to read about them fucking, and if it upsets you enough that you need to try to annoy people into stop shipping it… you need to rethink your relationship with fiction. I’m saying this because I had to do it, too. I went on with the mob and statements I agree to this day got mixed up with a bunch of nonsense and I thought that by being anti R//ylo I was making a statement, I was fighting against the romanticization of toxic relationships. I wasn't. It’s like that Luca Guadagnino’s film, “Bones and all”. Canibalism as a metaphor for love has been explored in multiple ways, by multiple artists in paintings, films, novels… Does it mean all the people who produced and consumed those works want to eat human flesh?

There’s also different ways of shipping an ETL ship. I love Wolfwren, and, in fanon, I don't mind it getting super angsty and fucked up, Killing Eve style, but I also love it when it's a slowburn romance with them going from enemies to reluctant allies to slowly building a friendship and falling in love. Do you see the range? Shipping is also about imagination, about overanalyzing things, about wondering what could character x possibly bring to character y? If Wolfwren ever does become canon, my perfect scenario would be the slowburn one, though I’ll love every second of them fighting and stare into each other's eyes until then.

If you ship S/b/rza, it doesn't mean you're homophobic. Unless you, well, use homophobic rhetoric to hate on Wolfwren and/or its shippers. This homophobic rhetoric can also be an attempt of being (hate to use this word) “woker” than the person shipping a gay ship and saying the queer people shipping Shin and Sabine are actually reinforcing lesbian stereotypes. Triste me when this is not the hot take you seem to think it. Maybe try researching a bit about queer representation in media, queercoding and the hays code era. Or try to put yourself in our shoes. As I stated above, representation has its limits but it matters and increases our ability to connect to the pieces of fiction we're consuming. In my case, as much as I can enjoy it, there's always gonna be a degree of alienation when it comes to “straight people media”. That's why I headcanon characters as sapphic. Because I am. That's why autistic people headcanon characters as being autistic. Same goes for trans people and other minority groups that do the same. So, in the end, it doesn't really need to be canon and even after today I’m still not that hopeful, ‘cause, again, it's Disney. If anything, there's always a possibility that, if Shin lives, she ends up being paired up with a random dude just so people can't call her a lesbian (this has never, ever, stopped a lesbian before tho lol). I'm guessing whatever happens with Wolfwren won't affect what happens to S/b/rza. I may be proven wrong in the future but I think they closed that door in the show, at least for now. Filoni doesn't seem that interested in writing romance to me, especially this time around. We are yet to see physical or romantic attraction being even remotely alluded to in this show. (S/b/rzas interpretation of Sabine's motivation to find Ezra or my interpretation of the tension between Shin and Sabine doesn't change that). It's a pretty sexless show (and I’m not saying they should have explicit sex on a Star Wars show, but George Lucas didn't shy away from romance and showcasing attraction and romantic love). I believe that's why he made sure to “discard” S/b/rza, despiste knowing it was a relatively popular ship in the Rebels fandom (obviously it doesn't stop anyone from shipping it, but it is an indicative of how Filoni intended us to perceive their dynamic). You know what I mean? Wolfwren happening or not, being or not supported by the cast and crew, doesn't change anything for your ship. And to be really honest, it is kind of funny to me that some people feel threatened by Wolfwren. ‘Cause, like, even if Filoni wants to make it canon, in the end it will be up to Lucasfilm and Disney to allow it or not and the best they gave us so far is Velcinta in Andor. Do you truly believe we have a better chance at getting our endgame than you do? Come on, guys. Please. I don't think any of us will, just to be clear, but even if Wolfwrens “win” this ship war, it won't be like some injustice or disrespect towards the s/b/rza fandom. Same goes for s/b/rza, because unlike Poe x Zorrii that was a last minute, pulled of their ass straight romance that only existed to send the very clear message that Poe Dameron is a heterossexual man (lol, he isn't). Ezra and Sabine do have a history together that I see as platonic but can be interpreted as romantic. And you will still be able to ship it, even if Sabine ends up with Shin. That's why fanfiction exist. If she ends up with Ezra, I’ll keep reading my Wolfwren fanfics and be happy with it. At the end of the day, it's just fiction. I care enough about it to write a long ass Tumblr post, but not to make me actually upset over a relationship that isn't my own.

[virtie333]

Day 5 - Life Day Damerey Celebration

Prompt: Holiday

Summary: A new relationship is tested.

Warnings: This is a Modern Alternate Universe story. There will be more incoming. Fluff and feelings in this one.

AO3

“What do you mean you can’t come because you’re working?” he asked her. “It’s Christmas Eve! No one should have to work a holiday.”

Rey had just started dating Poe Dameron two short months ago. They had met thanks to their mutual friend, Finn, and while things had been going well in their relationship so far, and Rey was exceedingly happy to have finally found someone who actually seemed to ‘get her,’ she knew there would be bumps in the road. Apparently, this was the first one.

“I agree no one should work on holidays when you’re talking about retail or service industries, but some jobs are necessary all the time,” Rey argued. She hated that this conversation was happening over the phone. She would really like to see his expressive face right now, to know what he was thinking.

“Well, of course!” Poe countered. “Hospitals and cops and firefighters and such,” he continued. “They are needed and are hopefully getting extra pay for their service.” He paused. “But Rey, you work for a bank. Why are you working Christmas Eve?”

Rey smiled. There was a bit of a whine in his voice. “I’m not working my regular job,” she told him. “I’m volunteering at the local animal shelter.”

The other end of the line was silent, so after a moment, Rey continued.

“I’m volunteering to feed and clean that night so that the regular staff and other volunteers can have the night off to be with their families. I’ve always done it over holidays since I don’t have family of my own. I had already signed up to do it this year before we started dating and I didn’t bother changing it because I didn’t know if you even celebrated Christmas or not.”

“Well, yeah,” Poe answered her non-question. “Dad and I have always had a traditional Christmas Eve. Dinner followed by presents.” He sighed. “I was really getting excited about the thought of you joining us. I think he was, too.”

“I’m sorry, Poe,” Rey said, and she truly was. “I should be done by eight, if you guys want to do it a little later than normal?” She paused. “Or you could come with me and we could get done sooner..?”

“I… I wouldn’t know what to do. I’d just be in your way.” He sounded surprised but not upset. And he hadn’t said ‘no.’

“It’s not that difficult. I’ve done it so much I could do it in my sleep. It would be easy to direct you.” She bit her lip before adding, “and I know you’d love to love on all those dogs and cats.”

He huffed a laugh. One of the things that had helped them bond was their shared love of animals. Poe’s dog BB had solidified that bond by attaching himself to Rey more than any other woman Poe had dated. Or so he said. “Are you sure?” he asked, his voice still uncertain.

“Poe, I would love to spend Christmas Eve with you, even if it means cleaning cat litter boxes and scooping dog poop.”

His responding laughter made her smile. Oh, how she loved to hear him laugh!

“Okay,” he finally said. “I’ll do it. I’ll just let Dad know we’ll be a little later than normal.”

Rey’s heart thumped hard a couple of times in her chest. She was more sure than ever that she was falling in love with this man. “Thank you, Poe,” she said softly. “For inviting me to be a part of your traditions and for your help.”

“Thank you, Rey,” he responded. “For letting me be a part of your holiday traditions, too.”

This just might be the best Christmas ever.

[greenjacketwhitehatdocmui]

Star Wars/Babylon 5 Thought:  General Ivanova

One of the very, very random things that popped into my mind was what if, in The Last Jedi, Amilyn Holdo wasn’t the one in charge?  What if someone else was?

What if Susan Ivanova was in charge?  I’m not shoving Holdo out the airlock.  I’m just wondering if General Ivanova was the ranking officer after most of the command staff got blown off the bridge?

(This is off the top of my head, folks.  Don’t look for deep, deep meaning here.)

First things first--she would tell the crew that they have a plan, but that she is open to any options and suggestions.  Oh, and I’m pretty sure that any speech she gives would include “the Resistance isn’t dying today.  Not on my watch and not on yours.” 

What would she do with Poe?  Well, in a private room, she would let him know in no uncertain terms that she is this/close to dumping him out an airlock for disobeying a direct order.  And no, the excuse that his comm was shot out isn’t going to cut it--because she was once a fighter pilot herself and she knows all the tricks to circumvent superior officers and uncomfortable questions.  And yes, blowing up the dreadnought was the right call--in retrospect.  But from the POV of the surviving higher-ups...it was the act of an unstable pilot who probably shouldn’t have been put back in the cockpit so soon.

Ivanova:  “Dameron, I need a plan other than running until we’re out of fuel.  We don’t have the firepower to take on that fleet and the hyperdrive has maybe one more good jump with the fuel we have.  The thing is, we jump and the First Order will just follow us.  Then they’ll wipe us out.  I think you can come up with another option.  What do you say?”

Poe:  “Why are you asking me?  Didn’t you just say I was on thin ice?”

Ivanova:  “Yes, you are.  And right now, we need every idea that might work.”  *pauses*  “Did you think I was going to lock you out of the loop out of sheer spite?”

Poe:  “Well...maybe...”

Ivanova:  “That would be really stupid and petty.  We don’t have time for that...Commander.”

Poe:  “Wait, didn’t General Organa--”

Ivanova:  “--demote you?  Yes, but right now, we can’t afford the gap in the ranks.  Just remember this little mantra.”

Poe:  “?”

Ivanova:  “`I will listen to Ivanova.  I will not ignore Ivanova’s recommendations. Ivanova...is God.   And...if this ever happens again, Ivanova will personally rip your lungs out.’  Do I make myself clear?”

Poe:  “...yes, General.”

Ivanova (brightly):  “Good!  Now, let’s go outside, brainstorm some ideas and save the Resistance.  Oh, and bring your buddy Finn if he’s up.  I’m sure that Amilyn will pout about it, but he knows First Order tech.”

Poe:  “Amilyn?”

Ivanova:  “Admiral Holdo.  It was her bomber fleet that you got wiped out.  She didn’t like that.”

Whoof.  Okay, that went a little long.  Maybe I should write this up.

--Doc

[inastrangerskiss]

fingerprints

Finn Balor x Reader

content warning: you all might remember the gif of roman and finn checking on each other at extreme rules. this was totally not influenced by that. (yes it was)

summary: finn lays beside you after a particularly bad argument

You lay there for a moment.

Flat on your back, eyes on the ceiling.

You weren’t alone. Not with FInn by your side.

But, for a moment, you felt alone.

The argument had started simple as always. He came home from the gym without having stopped at the grocery store like you had asked. He offered to go back out but, in your eyes, the damage had been done. He had forgotten and now dinner was ruined and all you could do was sit there.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true.

You could’ve told him to go back out. You could’ve told him you’d go with him. You could’ve made a date out of it. But, instead, you decided that Finn was simply no longer committed to your relationship and was better off leaving you be.

Now, maybe this was a decision borne out of exhaustion from work and exhaustion from your family and friends, but it was what your brain decided was the truth and so you initiated the argument.

“You’re blowing this out of proportion.” Finn reasoned, his voice frustratingly calm.

“Maybe if you cared half as much as I do you wouldn’t have forgotten to get the groceries.” You bit back.

Barbs were exchanged. Voices were raised. And eventually you waved your hands in the air and claimed you were done.

You marched to the bedroom you and Finn had shared for years now and slammed the door. There, you curled up on the duvet, tears freely flowing down your cheeks. You didn’t care if he could hear you. You didn’t care if it made him feel bad. You left him standing in the kitchen, head in his hands, elbows resting on the countertop.

You half expected to hear the front door open and close. You half expected to hear his car pull out of the driveway, off to an uncertain future.

You hadn’t expected him to push the bedroom door open.

Quietly, he crawled into bed beside you. His eyes followed yours, training them on the ceiling. He didn’t say a word. He just lay there beside you.

His leather jacket was unbuttoned but adorning his torso, the boots you got him for his birthday now on his feet.

You could hear him breathing. In fact, that was all you could hear and you worried if it got any quieter he’d hear your heart beating apprehensively against your chest. The silence was filled with intention. Intention to speak. Intention to end this fight. Intention to find your way back to each other.

Occasionally, he’d glance over at you but you didn’t want to be the first to surrender.

Neither did he, apparently.

Your frustration and anger began to well up in your throat as minutes passed without words exchanged. You didn’t understand how he didn’t realize he was in the wrong. You didn’t understand why he wouldn’t just apologize.

You didn’t understand why you were so hellbent on vilifying him.

Finn had always been good to you. Not just good, no. He had been the most wonderful person you had ever given your heart to.

The way he would lace his fingers between yours on walks into town. The way he would kiss your head every night before crawling in beside you, whether you asked him to or not, whether you were awake or asleep. The way he would keep his hand on the small of your back at parties where you didn’t know anyone as though he were saying “I’m here. I’m here with you.”

You almost laughed remembering all the times he spent in the passenger seat of your car, gripping the grab bar with white knuckles and complaining about how you were “incapable of driving well” and “needed to stop yelling at other drivers”.

You would be lost without him

He had been everything to you. He was always everything to you.

FIrst you heard a gentle rustle. The noise of a body moving against a duvet. Then you felt it.

Before he made contact, you could feel the warmth of his body as it closed in on yours. Slowly, his thumb and index finger gingerly pressed against your arm. He paused for a moment, waiting for a reaction. When he didn’t receive one, he rubbed his thumb up in small circles over your skin.

It was silent but it wasn’t.

He stayed there, repeating the motion with his hand over and over, slowly and methodically. And before you knew it, you were brimming with tears.

You tried to hold the floodgates shut but it was a futile effort.

Finn turned to you, his face calm, his eyes bright and understanding.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

The question wasn’t phrased as though he had no clue what could’ve possibly led to your less than chipper mood. It was phrased with every moment of the last few hours in mind.

“Was this all really about the grocery store?”

As he waited for your answer he reached out, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear. You shivered under his touch. He wiped a tear from your cheek and patiently watched you as you tried to formulate a response.

“I don’t know.” You finally managed.

“You don’t know?”

“No.” You paused once again, before sitting up quickly, dropping your face into your hands. “Why couldn’t you have just done the shopping I asked you to do.”

“Listen, I apologized as much as I can.” He spoke carefully, not a hint of anger in his voice. “You know I can’t go back in time and fix that. But I don’t think that’s what’s got you all spun up.”

You were quiet. You didn’t want to give in so easily but the deepest part of your heart knew you were standing on the edge of a bridge, holding a box of matches and the sparks were beginning to fly.

“I’ve missed you.” You finally admitted.

“I knew that.” Finn laughed.

“No. Like. I think if you go on the road again I’ll lose it.”

“I’m home for a few weeks.”

Finn’s smile was unwavering as he looked over to you. He had optimism written all over his face and you couldn’t help but want to feel the exact same way.

“You know that makes it worse.” You murmured into the side of your hand.

Finn’s face fell. There was only so much either of you could do. He knew it as well as you. But he also knew better than to agree with your defeatist attitude. He took your hand in his and stared down at it for a moment. You could see his brain trying to rifle through ideas and suggestions, his brow scrunching under the weight of his mind.

Carefully, he laid back down and patted his chest, inviting you onto it. You couldn’t say no.

With your ear beside his heart, you heard the rhythmic thrumming and felt the rise and fall with each breath. He roped an arm around your side and pressed a kiss to the crown of your head.

For the moment you felt okay.

“I’m not going to lie to you, you know.” He started.

“I know.”

“I’m not going to tell you that I’ll stay here and I won’t leave ever again.” Finn continued. “Because this was part of the deal when we started seeing each other.”

“I know.”

“But that doesn’t mean I’m unwilling to figure out how to make this better.” Finn’s voice was directed down into your hair, getting lost on the way to your ears. “So, tell me, what can I do? What can we do?”

“I don’t know.”

You wanted to cry again but Finn’s grip tightened on your body, as though he could sense the tears welling up in your eyes.

“I need you to talk to me. Do you want this or not?”

His tone was measured and quiet. It was loving but stern. Every word washed over you and you could tell you had one chance left to get things right. So you thought and you waited. You inhaled his cologne, deep into your lungs and centered yourself.

And then you spoke.

“I want you.” You spoke, firmly.

“Then how can I make this better for you?”

“Just -” You felt yourself get flustered. “Just call me more. Think about me more. When you’re gone it’s so lonely. You have no clue.”

“You’re not the only one who’s alone.” He spoke quickly, catching you off guard.

You hadn’t considered that he might also miss you. You hadn’t considered that maybe somehow you had also not done enough to maintain your relationship.

That maybe this was a two player game.

You nuzzled closer to Finn’s chest and he held you tighter. The slopes of his chest served as your pillow, as your comfort. You would sacrifice a million beds if it meant getting to lay here for the rest of your life. His arms would be your blankets and his chin the headboard.

“Just call me more.” You spoke softly, buried in the fabric of his shirt.

With a kiss and a gentle squeeze of your arm, Finn announced his agreement. He laid still for a moment longer, not ready to move until you were.

“Were you gonna leave?” You asked, thumbing his coat.

“Eh, I thought about it but I don’t think I’d know how to start the car if it meant leaving you.”

He was quiet for a while, his fingers stroking through your hair. You felt yourself drifting off, exhausted from the argument and the day itself. You dug your fingers into the soft leather of his jacket, praying to never have to let go.

You felt him shift slightly, tilting his head down to look at you.

“Do you want me to stay?” He asked, doubt coloring his words.

Carefully, you pushed yourself up and brought your face to his, lowering for a quick kiss before laying back down, eyes locked with his. It was just the two of you. There was no world around you. There was no time passing, there was no air besides the air between your two faces. There was just Finn and there was just you. Nothing less, nothing more.

“I want you to stay.” You whispered.

He smiled and you felt at peace. You felt at home.

He stood from the bed and you sat up to face him. With a flourish, he held a hand out to you.

“C’mon.” He spoke as he pulled you up. “Let me order you some take out and first thing tomorrow I’ll go to the store.”

“I’ll come with you.” You offered.

He grinned a broad grin and you took his hand. As he led you downstairs you felt his grip tighten a few degrees, his thumb rubbing circles over the back of your hand. He was keeping you close and he was keeping you safe.

And through it all, you would always want to keep him. No matter how close or far you were from one another.

It was a part of your deal. And it was a promise you would always keep.

[kinetic-elaboration]

January 15: Monty/Raven, Accurate/Indefinite

As is so often the case with me, I don't know what this is. I didn't have a strong idea going in so I just went with Dramatic.

This is part of the Ark AU, and takes place before the beginning of that story.

Monty/Raven, ~660 words, written in about 20 minutes

For the prompt "accurate, and its antonyms (inaccurate, indefinite, unreliable, faulty)" from my July Break Bingo 2023 card.

*

One thing Raven and Monty have in common is an unerring desire for accuracy in all tasks and perfection in all results, paired with a stark understanding that such things will never be. Their ship is old and faulty, and it cannot ever be otherwise again. They are both only part of the shoestring and glue that holds the thing together—not that Raven would ever admit to Monty's face that she gives him as much credit as that.

Their relationship, too, is uncertain and stumbling: indefinite, and in that way, one might say faulty, too. Two months after the first time, she finally invited him back to her quarters on Mecha. But then they hardly knew what to do with each other in the privacy behind a locked door, in the space of a single bed. He showed a certain patience that she'd never felt in him before. She would not be so naive as to say it was love or even desire, because desire is something lofty and beautiful, and they've only ever been clawing and scratching in the dark. Still, he took his time and he stretched himself out and he kissed her slow. He left her with hollows of time in which to think—something she'd always avoided in the past, with him.

She's heard rumors that all his other girls are ex-Prison Station, which makes her wonder if she's special, if there's some sort of hidden meaning there. Maybe he knew Finn on the inside and figures, close enough. Or maybe Raven crept up on him in some unexpected way, and he intends this no more than she does, and is compelled to keep going like it's some kind of dare.

Sometimes she shows up on Go-Sci just to rag on him about the hole in the security system in Alpha Sector 4, something she shouldn't even know about except that any fool could see it, and sometimes he reminds her that the patch job in that section of family quarters on Farm is so weak, he could probably rip it apart with his bare hands. He grew up on Farm and knows that's always been a damn trouble spot. But if she's such a genius, why can't she figure something out?

"I am a damn genius," she answers.

He flicks his gaze all the way down her body, slow, then raises his eyebrows like a dare.

Maybe she is special.

Maybe they will always be indefinite, faltering, because they've been broken up in pieces and turned old before their time, and they cannot ever again be otherwise again. That's when she thinks when she catches sight of sweetness in him. When she spies him across the cafeteria at a crowded lunch hour, laughing and joking, hiding that laughter behind his hand. He's only twenty, looks young still, sometimes, for his age.

For a while, in her quarters, he slides himself down under the covers and just lies there, his breath hitting ragged and tired against the bare skin of her hip. She lets her hand fall down and cards her fingers through his hair. Her lungs are working hard, trying not to burst. Something's cracked up, uncertain, a story they could have had together but she just can't find the thread of it, doesn't know what she's doing. She’s thinking not about the Skybox girls but about the Station itself, how he never talks about it, how he'd up and leave now without a second-thought if she even said the word. She's the shoestring and the glue, sliding her fingers again and again through the soft strands of his hair. Holding them both together, somehow. He pokes his nose against her hip. Underneath the blanket, he must be hot, sticky with sweat, unable to ignore for a moment the lingering scent of them, too aware of the wrinkles on the sheets that, somehow, they've half-pulled off the mattress. Surrounded on all sides by the wreckage they've created and become.

[untitled-gem]

it's kinda weird that we never got to see any of simon's blood family considering we got to see finn & jake's, marceline's, bonnie's, and BMO's (well his isn't blood but you know what i mean). simon is just as much a main character as the rest of them.

actually, we still don't even really know that much about simon to be honest? we know he was a professor and all that jazz, and that he was caring to the ones he loved, but that's kinda it. i feel like the show makes being ice king + his relationships with betty and marcy his main trait a lot of the time

and even in fionna and cake it looks like it's gonna continue more of the ice king type stuff.

this is gonna be rambly and stupid but i also kind of feel like you could dissect why simon is always begging for forgiveness from the ones he loves the most. has he lost many people before? was he always impulsive and uncertain, and the crown just amplified these feelings? on the other hand though, i feel like anyone would act like this if they were in his position so idk...