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prismarine-parrots · 5 years

Text

Tree of Life Pt. 4

Originally posted: 12 Mar. 2019

In the endgame now

...I just watched Endgame yesterday but thAT WASNT INTENTIONAL MY HEART—

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 3.5 Part 5 (1) Part 5 (2)

Sorry for the repeat of last part at the beginning, like I said 3.5 wasn’t part of the original story so it was only mentioned before

The small group floated at dusk to the small cave base in a multitude of boats.

It was a bitter irony, really, that the only reason the party fit in this bay was because nearly half of them were dead and not coming back as far as they knew, or grieving so much they couldn't continue onwards.

It was with a solemn, firm thunk as Xisuma was the first to climb onto the dock from his boat that he was sharing with Impulse, who had been silently grim himself as he traveled alone of his trio.

"Is... this the place?" Jevin asked slowly. Joe Hills flicked the map to straighten it and looked at the terrain of the cliff side, then at his map.

"I believe so," Joe confirmed.

X closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I hope we find the answers we're looking for..." he murmured under his breath.

The rest of the hermits heard him, but said nothing. Their numbers were crushed and it was obvious that Xisuma had been trying to be the leader he sometimes just wasn't. He may be the server admin, but that was because he had the technical know-how of how to run the server. He wasn't the emotionally strong one (that was Doc) or the strategic one (Cubfan, who looked like a ghost himself after losing Scar.) But X had taken the responsibility upon himself because of the duty he felt to fix this mess, and the fact that his role as admin has to have SOMETHING to do with all of it.

"Let's go," Doc climbed out of his boat like a soldier and marched into the cave.

"Doc- Doc! Are you sure that's a good idea? We don't know what, what horrors await us in there?" Joe protested.

Iskall was right behind the creeper cyborg, being in the same boat (literally) as him. The Swede looked back over his shoulder, his single eye sweeping over the remaining hermits in a vengeful dark gaze.

"We've already seen some messed up stuff in the past week, Joe. You weren't there for Grian, but he was messed up before he died. False just collapsed and died right in front of us. Tango went feral and starting acting like a real demon! And then if anything, I know we all saw how broken Cub was..."

There were small glances of grief and worry as each death was recounted. Stress had squeezed Cleo's pale green hand when False's dramatic, early death was mentioned, and Impulse winced at the memory of seeing one of his friends have to be killed with a sword to keep him from hurting anyone else after he had already stabbed Python with his horns.

Python died soon after as well.

"If there's ANY chance of at least keeping the rest of us from perma-dying, and MAYBE revive everyone else, we have to take it!" Iskall claimed firmly.

X knew that Iskall and Doc were right. He knew they ALL had to be as strong as them if they were going to fix everything. Even though there was a crushing pain every time one of those messages appeared on their phones, they had to keep going or every one of them were going to die.

X joined the two leaders and waved on the rest of the remaining hermits.

"Let's go, guys. For everyone."

Then Doc walked forward, followed by Iskall, X, Impulse, Cleo, Stress, Jevin, Joe and Ren. They were that was all that was left of the outstanding hermits, except for Mumbo who stayed at the main Hermitcraft Isle to watch over the people who died there, and Cub who decided he couldn't go forward after Scar died and went back to meet Mumbo.

The cave they had entered was clearly manmade and had a attempted terraforming job on it, but it was sloppy and easily noticeable. There were far and few torches to light the tunnel on the inside, making their passage spooky and tense.

"This is kind of like inside the Team S.T.A.R. base," Ren noted quietly, "just no labyrinth."

X chuckled. "Very glad for that. I'd much rather have a straight path than trying to actually navigate those ramps."

"How do you think we felt?" Iskall demanded.

"Oh yeah, I forgot you guys were on G-Team, heh." Doc taunted subtly.

"Are you trying to say something, DocM?" Joe immediately accused.

Doc smirked and raised his hands in a surrender gesture while Impulse was grinning with humor.

"No no, of course not."

"Why would you even suggest such a thing?" Impulse added cheekily.

"Humph. Just remember who won the war, alright?" Jevin reminded. The S.T.A.R. veterans shared a look.

"Only if you remember who destroyed you in Hermitgang!" X shot back.

There was a gasp from the G-Team members.

"How dare you!"

"Ow, my dignity has been stuck once again!"

"Well played, well played..."

"And only if YOU remember who made a counter strike to that malicious attack! I do not stand for these crimes to go without justice! I do not understand how you all can let them get away with that!"

"...what, Joe?"

Joe was fuming at the mention of the rap while everyone else was either confused, or still confused but laughing anyway.

Suddenly the ground dropped from beneath the group as they walked, getting a collective yelp as they fell a few blocks downward.

"Hey! Who did that?" Stress bounced back to her feet and yelled.

"Shut up, the whole lot of you! Just- just be quiet, for once!"

The hermits looked to each other in confusion.

"Did that sound like...?" Cleo left her question hanging and looked to Xisuma.

The turtle man sighed. "Looks like my clone is back in action. What do you bet he has something to do with the trees?"

"Too much," Iskall agreed grimly as Ren starting digging a staircase up the other side of the pit.

"X, you get to deal with him," Doc growled, not meaning to sound aggressive, but everyone was on edge again after what happened with Evil Xisuma last season.

X silently climbed the staircase and poked his head over the top. The hallway extended just far enough that the pit was hidden in the dark spot between two light sources, but looking now they had actually reached the end of the tunnel and it opened up to some sort of base with chests on the far wall.

X looked down at the hermits looking up at him and held a finger to his helmet in a shush gesture before climbing over the edge and going ahead while the rest of the group climbed up.

"Come on, come on, let this work, what else could that baffoon do that I can't that might reverse this? Ugh, those hermits, I hate them, and I know they dislike me, but this is a cruel way to get rid of me..."

X leaned around the corner to indeed see his alter ago hovering over a brewing stand. Well, not really hovering, and his feet were on the ground and he was leaning heavily on his right arm. While EX's back was turned to the original, it wasn't hard to tell that something was not right. Looking around EX's base, X saw a large screen with some familiar looking GUIs on it and a small device on the desk next to it.

I was wondering where my old phone from last season went off to. Guess I know now.

"Come on- yes!" EX took whatever potion he was brewing and chugged it without a second thought. He grimaced and wiped his mouth in seeming disgust and waited a few seconds before groaning.

"Check custom healing potion off the list... I hate sweet things, UGH..."

“Except cookies,” Xisuma chuckled under his breath with humor. Evil X liked cookies probably a bit too much for his own good, and personally X had wondered if he had been the Jangler before it was discovered to be Scar.

EX gasped and tried to spin around, but lost his balance and ended up pinwheeling his arms, knocking over his brewing stand, and fell hard on the floor. He scooted backwards, still favoring his right arm, and looked up at X with an odd mix of fury and fear.

"You! Stay back, leave me alone! Come to watch my demise? You're crueler than I thought, Xisuma."

X stopped for a moment. Evil Xisuma, scared? If him? Something was very wrong then.

The green-clad man looked over his double. Everything about him seemed to be normal, except that his left sleeve was torn and there was a graze across it. It looked to not be a fresh wound, and X slowly realized why EX was so freaked out.

"You're affected by it too..."

"What? This isn't you hermits' doing?"

"Of course not! You may be a pest but we would never try to perma-kill anyone!"

"Perma-kill?"

X sighed and sat down cross-legged across from EX and took off his helmet.

Time to be the serious leader with this man.

"Yes. People are dead because of something happened to the life trees on the Hermitcraft server, and we don't know what do to about it. If you're affected by it too and have been doing research... I think we need your help."

Xisuma's phone buzzed twice in his suit pocket- a normal text message, thank goodness.

EX's stolen phone vibrated across the room as well and the message appeared on screen.

<Iskall85> are we really trusting this dude?

Both the Xisumas looked at the screen with a sinking feeling.

"What do you say?" Xisuma asked his clone.

EX stared deadpan at X through his red visor.

"Why are you asking this? I could easily kill you."

"Yeah I know. I don't like you either, not one bit. But half the server is dead and we're stumped for solutions before the entire whitelist is wiped from existence."

EX looked at X for a moment more before closing his eyes and taking off his own helmet, revealing the same face as the man before him.

"Alright. Just this once, I'll help you. Never again after this!"

<Iskall85> seriously?

"Yes Iskall!" Xisuma yelled. There was hushed laughter, and Iskall's obvious voice as he protested the teasing. EX scoffed and muttered something under his breath before heading back to his desk. The rest of the hermits slowly entered the room, varying between wary, distrustful, or curious.

Xisuma nodded to them and turned to the screen EX was at and started scanning the waterfall of information that flowed up as the alter ego brought up what files he did.

Points falling, coordinates of placed location, status effects, chunk coordinates, error messages, time of activation... these have nothing to do with one another?

"What is going on here...?"

——————————

Word count: 1950

Holy heck I didn't kill anyone this time?

TBH I don’t like this part, I changed my plans and didn’t kill EX here so the relevance of this is questionable. But there needed to be a calm chapter, so this works.

Life goals, literally

#hermitcraft #xisumavoid #evil xisuma #iskall85 #docm77 #joehills #stressmonster #zombiecleo #renthedog #ijevin #tree of life au #ToL #becca writes

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lacrimosathedark · 6 years

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I have a “call out post” for hellosandersfanders, since they’ve been so goddamn “kind” going around and “correcting” people~ I actually have them blocked so honestly it’s more of a vent and an informational post for people who are yet to block them. I’m also not tagging anyone so as to not bother them, but I use their full usernames you’ll still know what I’m talking about.

If you want a TL;DR, I essentially repeat this multiple times: PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO ENJOY THINGS. LET OTHERS ENJOY THINGS. YOU DON’T HAVE TO LIKE IT BUT DON’T BE A DICK ABOUT IT.

I’ll start off with the preface that most of their “call-outs” aren’t tagged appropriately. Specifically, they tag thomas sanders as well as the original basic ships. So these could just pop up when you’re looking for some Patton and Logan snuggles or some Roman and Virgil banter or anything else. Which is really fucking shitty, especially when they gripe about people tagging incorrectly. You’ll see.

In their bio and later in a post they talk about how they are saying what everyone else is too scared to say and denying that they’re a hate blog. Actually, this is their bio: “THIS IS NOT A HATE BLOG. This is a blog that calls out blogs and people that need to be called out. I'm taking it upon myself to make sure that everyone's blog experience is trouble free by setting bloggers straight.” But when you go after people, not even critiquing but full on criticizing and attacking them, that’s not a call-out, that’s hate. And here’s another thing. You can be the smartest dick in the room, but if you’re still a dick no one wants to listen to you.

Their first post is “Call out posts to fanders who draw fusions that include Deceit: that counts as a Deceit ship and it won’t hurt you to tag it as such. Stop being disrespectful and tag your stuff appropriately.” Saying a fusion counts as a ship isn’t necessarily the case, for one. And then says it’s disrespectful to not tag them as a Deceit ship. I know a lot of the time reblogs don’t get appropriately tagged, but if you go back to the original work, all of them are tagged for Deceit in some way, and often have said fusion in the tags (Loceit, Moceit, Princeit, Anxceit). I have never seen a fusion where the original artist didn’t tag the fusion components. And it’s well known that some people don’t like Deceit or are triggered by him in some way, so most fanders make an active effort to tag him. So that’s bullshit point one.

The next rude post they criticized cattonsanders for not tagging food and eating warnings for their compilation of the Sanders Sides characters not eating properly. But here’s the thing, while it wasn’t tagged, they said right in the post what it was, and the first frames are literally a title card saying “nobody in sanders sides knows how to eat”. And they didn’t say “hey, can you try to tag food and eating in the future?”, they said “ this is cute but you should’ve put a tag warning for food and/or eating. next time be mindful of other people.” like they have the right to scold and demand.

Next was them commenting on people commenting on a gif: “is it really necessary to add your comments on gifsets? why couldn’t you add it on the tags?” Why shouldn’t people talk in reblogs? You aren’t obligated to be part of the conversation or say anything, you can even go back to the original post without commentary and people enjoying themselves and reblog the original post. What is so goddamn tedious about seeing people talking and having fun over content they mutually enjoy? Fuck off with your fun-sucking bullshit.

They have made a handful of comments on randomslasher/LJ’s posts as well as a call-out so I’ll summarize: They think “LJ is everywhere” is and overdone joke and finds it “grating” that people still enjoy it, they think LJ is a hypocrite for understanding people don’t like Deceit while also sharing Deceit content, they say LJ doesn’t stand for anything and is a people-pleaser, and they said people shouldn’t “worship” them because they don’t stand for anything. So, to hit all of those points, as follows; You aren’t required to like a joke but as long as it doesn’t harm anyone just let people enjoy things. You don’t have to like something for it to be good. Next, people are allowed to like Deceit. The same way people can like Moriarty or the Joker or Deadpool or any character of poor or ambiguous morality. You can like a character that’s not a great person. Being aware that he upsets people just means you tag the content appropriately, not that you have to stop liking or sharing it because it makes other people uncomfortable. LJ isn’t a hypocrite for still sharing Deceit content if they like Deceit so long as they tag appropriately, jegus fuck. And I don’t know much about LJ, but do they really have to “stand for something”? It’s their blog, not yours, and it’s for fun, it doesn’t have to have a deeper purpose. And people don’t worship LJ, but they are admired for their content and personality. But they, and many other bigger blogs in this fandom, are constantly reminding their followers that they too are just people and just Fanders. It’s not fair to dislike them just for being well-liked. That’s just petty. They then whined when LJ blocked them, essentially calling them a coward. But I’ve seen LJ discuss things with people of less than like minds, and they aren’t perfect but they’re pretty respectful. They blocked you because you’re a whiny bitch, not because you disagree with them.

Next they went after princelogical. They said Marin is just imitating Logan in how he “speaks” and it’s “annoying and fake”. That rubs me the wrong way because I have been told I type like Logan talks at times, but y’know what? I’ve been told before ever hearing the name Thomas Sanders that my writing seems cold and distant and intelligent and precise. That is how I learned to write and express myself. It’s possible, even likely, that Marin is similar, that he is similar to Logan in that way and were prior to Logan existing. And people who mimic or pretend to be the characters that they criticize, so fucking what? People aren’t allowed to explore the characters or themselves, or practice writing or getting into character like that? They also say: “He’s also very in your face about being christian, which is very offensive to people of other religion like myself.” News flash, buddy, they say right in their bio that they’re Christian. Don’t like it, don’t follow him. And here’s a thing, I hate organized religion with a burning passion. But his religiousness never does more than poke at a nerve. And he uses it as a way to spread positivity instead of hate like a lot of Christians do nowadays. And hey, that someone is personally another religion and shares it on their personal blog is not an offense to someone of a different religion, be fucking mature.

They next attacked organizeddiscord, and I don’t really know Sam so I’m gonna argue more with their points, if I make a wrong assumption about her I apologise. For context, I don’t know if she does this so imma put the first part of their comment for you to judge rather than piece it apart: “Does nothing but complain about her content not being reblogged then constantly makes posts that guilt trip people into reblogging her content, starts unnecessary drama, and acts mean and horrible towards Deceit fans. I don’t like Deceit too but I never act the way she does.” After that they go on to say how she is “forcing” the Virgil/Thomas ship on the fandom and how it’s disrespectful to Thomas. Look, I hate that ship too, it weirds me out, but no one is forced to read any of what she posts about it (blocked tags and tumblr savior exist for a reason) and anyone is allowed to create anything they want, that’s not forcing it on anyone. And I don’t see how it’s disrespectful to Thomas. Sanders Sides Thomas is a characters, Shorts Thomas is a character, they aren’t real. Thomas knows abut ships, he has said he thinks they’re cute. He makes jokes about the concept of sleep essentially being his wild boyfriend, and there was a joke about him sharing his bed with his anxiety, which is essentially Shorts verse version of Virgil. And guess what? You don’t have to like it for her to be able to enjoy it. She’s allowed to enjoy it. They later said she was plagiarizing when she took a text post that has been circling around, and also sourced it, and made it a Sanders Sides essentially fake quote. And they demanded she take it down. Buddy...that’s not how things work. It’s not plagiarism if you say it’s not yours. And she did the right thing in sourcing it too. But this happens all the time, are you going to attack every “fake quotes” thing ever, even just in this fandom? Because honey even you don’t have the time for that.

They then go after theonlyjelly-iwillput-inmybelly and boy did I feel like a cat with their hairs on end when I saw them be a dick to Cole. They don’t like Cole’s shitposty humor. It’s not for everyone but a lot of people think he’s funny. And some of his crazy shenanigans come from medications or even from just being bilingual and keeping words right. The��“childish talk” I find funny, and it’s not like it’s baby talk, and it can also be rather insightful. Plus even if you think he sounds stupid, here’s the thing: most people sound smarter in their native language. Cole isn’t from an English-speaking country. He is allowed to not use every word like it came out of your goddamn English textbook or some stupid novel or whatever. And the bear thing is because his username and icon are a reference to Crofter’s whose mascot is a bear. If you aren’t gonna bitch at Thomas for making so many Crofter’s jokes, then leave Cole the fuck alone for it.

They then made a call-out for what-even-is-thiss and...sadly I agree with them on this one, though I hate how rudely they worded it, so I’m just gonna copy what they said. ““Roman” if that’s even his real name, has no regards to other people’s feelings and just says whatever the hell enters that brain of his. He is so bad that other blogs have called him out. And yet he acts as if nothing has happened. No remorse or anything.” I will say one thing though; Roman, to my recollection, is a trans guy and chose his name. He’s allowed to choose any name he fucking wants. And even if that’s not his real name? It’s the fucking internet didn’t you guardian teach you not to give out personal information on the internet?

They then called out anxietys-room for not being helpful and for passing it off to followers to give advice. Here’s the thing; they aren’t professionals. They are normal people who want to help people struggling and can only do so much. And I’ve seen a number of times them pushing help lines for people who desperately need that. How shitty do you have to be to attack something so well-intentioned?

They then yelled at insanelycoolish for not putting their story under a “Keep Reading”, which they used later for their taglist. It’s a fair thing to say, long posts you don’t care to read are obnoxious. However, they didn’t ask if Finn could fix it or do something else next time. They said this: “would it kill you both to add all of these under a read more?” “you both” presumably is referring to the-pastel-peach, whom Finn was conversing with because she enjoyed his fic. But she can’t do anything, it’s not her post. Ugh I’m so sick of this dude...

This is all that’s on their account for now, but let’s circle back to their bio. No one needs to be called out for having a different sense of humor than you or liking things you don’t like. You aren’t making the fandom trouble-free, you’re causing trouble and pain and anger by attacking our friends. Maybe that’s your real intent. But either way, you have made yourself our enemy.

You have no right to consider yourself a Fander, so I hope you don’t. Thomas preaches caring and acceptance, and asking nicely for things you need. He would be ashamed of you.

#vent #rant #cursing #deceit mention #hellosandersfanders #discourse #Sorry #I'm very mad

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sevens-evan · 6 years

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pride month day 9

author: daisys-quake

rated: t

ship: michelle jones/shuri

word count: 1340

prompt: here

a/n: is it technically june 10 right now? yes. yes it is. oops. i’m writing a fic a day for pride month, see my post with details here.

“I don’t get what the big deal is,” Peter says, opening his locker while he talks. “Aren’t you, like, anti-monarchy?”

“Everyone is anti-monarchy, dumbass,” MJ says. “And that’s not the point.” Peter slams his locker, turning and grinning at her.

“The point is you met a pretty girl and don’t know how to deal with it,” he says smugly.

“I didn’t say that.” Peter just grins wider and turns to walk down the hall. “Peter, I didn’t say that,” she repeats, falling into step beside him. He shrugs indifferently. “I didn’t fucking say that.”

“The lady doth protest too much,” Peter says, before immediately regretting it. And visibly, if MJ’s grin is anything to judge by.

“Doth.”

“Shut up.”

“Doth.”

“Shut up!” Peter takes a left, heading upstairs, and MJ continues straight.

“Doth!” she shouts after him. He flips her off over his shoulder without looking.

Here’s the thing: it’s not like Peter has an issue with the idea of MJ liking Shuri. He had a crush on Shuri at first, although it had very quickly turned into a strong and very much not romantic friendship built on a mutual love for science and a shared inability to take anything too seriously. But he almost never has anything to mock MJ for, since she stubbornly refuses to tell literally anyone anything about herself ever, so he is going to mock her for her crush for as long as humanly possible, dammit.

Although, MJ and Shuri would be kind of cute, now that he thinks about it.

Peter’s phone buzzes as he sits down in his next class. He pulls it out reflexively, checking the screen. One new text from Shuri.

Please tell me the MJ who came here for a research project this morning is the MJ you’re friends with.

Peter grins. It looks like maybe MJ’s out of control crush goes both ways.

Coffee later? he texts back. Shuri immediately agrees, and he slips his phone back into his pocket, still grinning to himself.

This is going to be so funny.

XxX

“She’s just so pretty,” Shuri tells him later, as they sit in Starbucks and split a cookie. “You don’t understand.”

“I have actually met her, you know,” Peter says, kind of wanting to roll his eyes.

“But you don’t understand,” Shuri insists. She sighs almost comically. “Do you think you can introduce us?”

“Didn’t you already meet her?”

“That’s different,” Shuri says. “That was school things.” Peter narrows his eyes at her suspiciously.

“Also you did something super embarrassing?” he asks, taking a stab in the dark.

“Also I did something super embarrassing,” Shuri agrees immediately. “She asked me how it felt to be an inspiration to girls in STEM and I was trying to flirt and I asked how it felt to be an inspiration to girls with hair.” Peter chokes on his cookie.

“Fuck,” he says when he’s managed to swallow properly. Shuri reaches across the table and smacks him on the back of the head.

“I’m doing my best,” she says.

“I’m changing your contact name to girl with hair.”

“You’re terrible.” Shuri pauses to sip her drink. “But do you think you can reintroduce me to MJ?”

“You only want me for my pretty friends,” Peter complains.

“Also your collector’s edition box set of all three seasons of the original series of Star Trek on DVD,” Shuri says. “But yes, that and MJ are the only two reasons we’re friends.”

Peter rolls his eyes and sips his coffee, a plan beginning to form in his head.

XxX

MJ has been sitting by herself for five minutes when the electronic bell above the door to the Starbucks rings. She glances up on reflex, and nearly drops her phone when she sees who it is. The pretty girl from the Wakandan outreach center, who she’d made an absolute fool of herself in front of.

Also known as the literal, actual crown princess of Wakanda, Shuri.

No one else seems to notice that actual royalty has just walked into the coffee shop. MJ has to blink a few times before she confirms that Shuri is, in fact, standing at the back of the line and glancing around the coffee shop, and that she isn’t just a very pleasant hallucination. Shuri catches her eye and breaks into a grin, waving at MJ.

Oh my God, she remembers me.

MJ waves back, dazed and confused. Shuri steps out of the line, hurrying across the coffee shop and stopping in front of MJ’s table with a shy smile.

“Yo,” MJ says, because she prides herself on being totally unshakable under pretty much any circumstances except those including pretty girls. Yo. Who the fuck says yo?

“Hi,” Shuri says, still smiling, which is going to make MJ pass out if she doesn’t stop. “What are you doing here?”

“Meeting Peter,” MJ manages to say, fairly coherently. Shuri’s smile disappears, and while MJ is immediately far more capable of breathing, she feels a pang of disappointment.

“I’m here to meet Peter,” Shuri says.

“What?” MJ glances down at her phone again.

Oops, can’t make it. Have fun w Shuri tho. From Spider-boy, one minute ago.

“That fucking—“ MJ turns her phone off, dropping it on the table and glaring at it. “I swear to God I’m going to kill him in his sleep.” Shuri frowns, her brow furrowing adorably, and slides into the chair across from MJ.

“What did he do?” she asks.

“He ditched us, the little bitch,” MJ says. “I’m going to steal his stupid spider suit and—“ she stops midsentence, snapping her mouth shut.

To be fair, MJ doesn’t usually go around telling people Peter’s secret. She hasn’t even told him that she knows about it—although, honestly, he and Ned talk about it in broad daylight in the school hallways. It doesn’t take MJ’s carefully developed observation skills to hear things.

Still, she doesn’t know if Shuri knows. Although, to be fair, Shuri’s brother is the Black Panther, and MJ has never gotten a believable story about how Peter met the princess of Wakanda in the first place.

“His suit?” Shuri says carefully. “Would that be the red and blue one?” MJ exhales in relief.

“Yep.”

“I didn’t know you knew about that,” Shuri says, getting more comfortable in her chair, as if she plans on staying there with MJ for awhile.

“Well, I’m not really supposed to,” MJ says. “But I stalked Peter for like a year, so—“ she cuts herself off when Shuri’s face shifts from interest to shock. “Okay, it wasn’t stalking,” she amends. “I just—he’s a weird little guy, alright? I was curious.” Shuri bites her lip, nodding slowly.

“And you figured it out,” she says. “From—not stalking him. Isn’t it meant to be a big secret?”

“He’s not exactly subtle,” MJ says. “And I’m very observant.”

“And what have you observed about me?” Shuri asks, raising an eyebrow. MJ nearly knocks her drink over.

“I, um,” she says. “Uh, you’re…short?” Shuri’s other eyebrow joins the first. “God, I’m so sorry—“ MJ’s apology is cut short by Shuri laughing, which—MJ is never going to thank Peter for setting her up like this, but maybe she’ll let him live.

“I’m going to go buy coffee,” Shuri tells MJ after a moment, still smiling. “And you will consider that you are just very tall, and everyone is short to you.”

“Sure,” MJ manages to say. Shuri slips out of the chair, glancing over her shoulder as she walks back to the front of the store and smiling at MJ again. MJ smiles back before picking her phone up and typing out a quick text to Peter, something along the lines of I’m going to fucking murder you in your sleep.

Shuri waves at her from the line, and MJ is pretty sure she’s actually going to die. Her phone dings, and she has enough presence of mind to glance down at it.

You’re welcome.

MJ blocks Peter’s number.

my ao3

#mj x shuri #michelle jones #shuri #marvel #my fics #fic: mj x shuri #pride month 2018 #i'm not super sure about this tbh?#idk if i got their characters right #i hope you liked it tho

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nothing-but-kpop-dreams · 6 years

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Mark Is Acting Weird: Epilogue

Author’s note: Finally We reached the epilogue. Thanks for sticking around for the series! Sorry for any errors.

Word Count: 1627

ALL PARTS

It was a relatively quiet night at the dorm. This was one of the few moments where they all had a chance to rest and be lazy. Mark took this chance to hide away in his room and forget the pressures of the idol life.

At the moment, Mark was laying on his bed listening to music. All was fine and dandy until a particular song came on. He thought he deleted it, but apparently he hadn’t. The song was y/n’s favorite song, one that she blasted over and over in the car. Before it could even get to the chorus, his mind was flooded with memories of y/n. Sure it had been at least a year and a half since they broke up, but he realized he still really missed her. Work had always been his best distraction, but right now was one of the few times that his mind refused to stop thinking about her. It was hard to erase their two years together and once more he was beating himself up for ruining it all.

Not wanting to dwell on his fuck up, Mark got himself out of bed and made his way to the kitchen. Food was going to be his distraction tonight.

He walked down the hall, hearing the familiar voices of his band mates coming from the kitchen.

“I’m excited to meet him!” He could hear Yugyeom’s voice. “I’ve only ever seen her boyfriend in the pictures she posted.”

Immediately Mark stopped in his tracks.

“I haven’t met him in person yet. But from what y/n’s told me alot about him, he doesn’t sound bad. Who was the one that met him already?” Bambam asked the group.

“I did.” Jb answered. “He’s pretty cool.”

“Not cooler than me though!” Jackson beamed. “I can’t believe she was able to move on from me.” he said with a dramatic sigh.

Then Youngjae’s laugh filled the room. “Shut up! You guys went on one date and then agreed that it was weird.”

“Um, excuse me! Haven’t you heard the saying “Once you go Jackson there… there ain’t no backin’!” Since we didn’t work out, she is just settling for the next best thing.” he said with a joking tone.

“Ok, one - you literally made that up right now.” Jinyoung groaned. “Two - I met him too and he’s way cooler than you.”

Mark made his steps as quiet as possible as he went closer and closer to their voices. A part of him wasn’t too surprised to hear that y/n was in a relationship, while the other half of him couldn’t help but continue to eavesdrop to hear what else he can learn about y/n. The idea of her in relationship was a concept he couldn’t grasp. It still felt as if just the other day he and y/n were cuddled on the couch, but now she was going to introduce her boyfriend to the guys.

Jackson let out a loud laugh. “I find that hard to believe! You’re so boring, everyone is cool compared to you.”

Jinyoung ignored Jackson’s comment and put his attention to Bambam. “Bambam, what time did she wants us to be there?”

“At 7”

“Ya!” Jb let out. “It’s 7:15! Guys, lets go, she’s probably already waiting.”

At his order, Mark heard the stampede of foot steps head out the door and soon the dorm was silent.

With the others gone, he shuffled into the kitchen. He was beginning to find himself saddened by the fact that everyone was seemed to move on except for him. Yeah, he went on a few dates here and there, but he didn’t find the connection he had with y/n. Y/n seemed fine without him and the guys no longer seemed to make the connection between him and y/n anymore, they all seemed to forget they met y/n through him. The last bit of information that one of them ever told him about her was Jackson, letting him know they went on a date, but it didn’t work out because he hung over their heads.

From what he was able to over hear, y/n was happy now… but that wasn’t good enough for him, he needed to know more. Before he knew it, he had his phone out. He was ready to search her name on every form of social media. Last time, he attempted to do this, she had blocked him on everything. Chances were he was still blocked, but it didn’t hurt to try.

He typed her name and surprisingly enough, he wasn’t blocked anymore. He didn’t know how it was possible, but he didn’t question it. Right away his thumb rolled over the screen and he skimmed through her whole feed.

Y/n’s profile was filled with posts; her account was alive. When he and y/n were together, she rarely ever posted anything. It was all in attempts to keep the relationship a secret. They didn’t want to take the risk of fans somehow making connections between the two of them. Now however, she posted about anything and almost everything.There were tons of pictures too, all of them filled with her beautiful smile. Her most recent pictures were filled with her “new boyfriend”. The new guy was a handsome guy, he hated to admit. There was a bittersweet feeling as he looked through all their pictures. Y/n was so happy, he hadn’t seen that from her in a while. He noticed that in most of the pictures, they were doing poses she would always beg him to do with her.Back then, he would always turn her down. In his mind, he felt if she liked a picture, she might be tempted to post it and risk exposing them and putting herself in the crossfire of crazy fans. The last thing he wanted was to put her through that, so he always played it safe.

It hurt him seeing her so happy with someone that wasn’t him. He always saw himself as the person to be there for her, make her happy, give her the life she deserved, but he wasn’t and he hated himself for it.

“She’s happy.” he whimpered to himself. “She’s happy, that’s what matters.” he repeated it over and over in attempts to convince himself to let her go.

Suddenly he heard the door bell. He jumped up and quickly blinked his eyes to clear his vision. “Who the heck would be here?” he asked himself. It didn’t make sense for anyone to ring the door bell, all the guys had their keys, heck even their parents had keys to the dorm.

He opened the door, seeing someone he didn’t think would ever come near the dorm. She stood in the hall, her small smile fading as she laid eyes on him. “Y/n?” She looked as beautiful as ever, so dolled up in her skirt, pretty coat and a face full of makeup. This was the opposite of how she would dress when they would go out. The go-to outfit when together was to dress as plain as possible to avoid being noticed.

“…Oh hey Mark…” she peeped

“Hey” he tried to smile, but he was so in shock to see her, his face probably wasn’t doing what his mind was telling it to do. “H-how’ve you been?”

“…good.” She avoided him eyes. “Are any of the guys here?” she asked, looking past him and into the dorm.

“Uh, no, they just left a few minutes ago.”

“Dammit! I should have known better than to text bambam last minute.” she mumbled to herself as she clenched the bundle of enveloped in her hands out of frustration.

“Ha, yeah, you should have texted Yugyeom at least.” he let out an awkward chuckle. He said anything to come off as normal. “We both know Bambam always ignores his texts.”

However, she didn’t even smile. “Well, i’m gonna give one of them a call… Bye”

“Wait!” his small voice was enough to keep her from walking away. “Uh… “ he pointed to the envelopes in her hand. “Were you gonna drop those off? I can give those to Bambam.” he played stupid and pretended to not know that she was originally going to meet the guys.

“Oh… nah. I was gonna give it to the guys, but they aren’t here so i’ll do it some other time.

“I - I can do it. It’s no problem.” he did want he could just to be able to see her a bit longer. “Even I don’t know when they’ll be back, so… I can do it if you want.”

She took a minute to think about his offer. “…ok, but only because i have a few other things to do and my boy- my ride is waiting for me and i know you guys are busy so i don’t know when i can see them.” she said it as if she was convincing herself to do it. she then very hesitantly handed him the envelopes.

He look down at them. There were six thick, gold envelopes, with the borders of them textured with an elaborate flower pattern. “Um, so what are these for anyway?” he couldn’t help but ask.

Her eyes shifted before she replied. “They are just invitations.”

“For? Uh, you know, if you don’t mind me asking…”

“My wedding”

“W-wedding?”

“Yeah” she said it as if he shouldn’t have been so surprised.

“Oh… Well congratulations.” again he tried to give a genuine smile and hide that fact that his whole body wanted to melt to the floor, but he wasn’t sure if his body was listening to his brain.

“Thanks. Bye” she said as she quickly trurned away and walked down the hall.

She moved away from his so fast, he didn’t have a chance to say bye back. He watched her go down the hall until she disappeared into the elevator. “Bye… I love you.” he mumbled.

-Admin Boat

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ah17hh · 4 years

Text

I fell in love and my husband disapproves. via /r/polyamory

I fell in love and my husband disapproves.

This is a REALLY long post, so I apologize in advance.

My husband (30) and I (26f) have been happily married for over 6 years. Just over a month ago, we decided that I would try to date women to determine for sure if I was bisexual. So I made an account on HER and quickly started talking to someone (34f), which I'll refer to as "C". I was really skeptical while talking to C but when we finally met in person a week later, it was like fireworks. We spent all day together and it was the best date I've ever had and all we did was go to a park and walk around. By the end of that date I KNEW I was bi and I REALLY liked this woman. I would even go as far as to say "love at first sight" kind of thing. I've only felt like that with one other person and I married him.

But when I came home that night, it was really late and my husband had already went to bed. He woke up and I excitedly told him about my date. He then told me that he was actually feeling pretty negative about the whole thing and he didn't anticipate feeling this way. It's my fault really- I didn't check up on him throughout the day to make sure he was still okay and I stayed out later than I originally planned. So we did what we always do when we have any issues- we talked about it.

He said that he felt like meeting her would make him feel better about the whole thing and that not knowing her was like he was missing a piece of information and therefore couldn't make an informed decision about whether he could be okay with us dating. So several days later we all met up and it went great. They got along and he said that he liked her. So he gave his blessing to spending the next day with her. I woke up early to leave because I was going to take a ferry to see her and she lives like 1.5 hours away. My husband woke up and went to start working out just as I was about to leave. He looked kinda glum, so I asked him if he was okay. He told me "I just need this to be over with." Normally he would tell me exactly how he's feeling, but even so my emotions clouded my judgment and instead of realizing he needed me to stay, I took it as he needed to know how he feels while I'm on a date and this was a "he needed more information" type of thing.

So I left and drove to the ferry. Once I was parked on the ferry I texted my husband to make sure he was okay. Plot twist, he wasn't. He was very upset and more so because I didn't choose to stay home when he needed me. So I told him once the ferry landed I would start driving home. I called C and told her I wasn't coming, and she was very understanding. She told me that out of respect for my marriage she would block me on everything and we'd part ways, but we continued to talk over a video call most of my drive home. We confessed our irrationally strong feelings for each other and cried.

When I got home, my husband and I had a really long talk where I shared that I loved her and she loves me and that now knowing that I feel that I'm polyamorous and want to live that lifestyle, that being abruptly forced to let go of C would make me feel like I was missing something. But I also reassured him that my feelings for C did not take away my feelings for him. We both cried and then cuddled and napped together. He told me that he didn't realize I felt that way and that knowing my feelings made him want to give it another shot.

So he messaged her since I was blocked on everything and our relationship was back on, but this time we were going to take things slower for my husband's sake. We established more boundaries and we all made an effort to continuously make sure everyone was still feeling okay about the whole thing. The following week my husband gave his blessing for me to visit her. This time I was back before my husband came home from work. I was taking care of some important phone calls when he got home, and a few minutes later I finished and went to greet him. I asked how he was feeling and he said he was upset that I didn't immediately greet him at the door. Mind you, I didn't use to do that before and I was in the middle of business calls, so while I felt his feelings were valid I did find that to be a bit unreasonable and kinda made me feel like he expected me to act like a dog.

So I've been spending the last few weeks working on my empathy and taking extra care to make sure my husband feels loved. But he now dislikes C. Her and I have had several arguments as we're trying to learn about what eachother needs and that plus the jealousy has painted C in a bad light for him. One argument with her ended in her saying "I'm done" and when I asked her to clarify she just repeated "I'm done." I interpreted that as she was ending it. My husband came home a few minutes after and I told him what happened and that she broke up with me. He told me to block her on everything and he messaged her letting her know I was doing that and to confirm an address to send back he necklace she lent me. She agreed that was a good idea and that was that.

The next few days I was literally grieving. I couldn't focus on anything and cycled through being angry, numb, and devastated, and began smoking pot daily to cope (I almost never smoke). Suddenly not having her made me feel intensely lonely. I don't really have friends and she was the first person in years that was eager to talk to me and hear about my day. I told my husband this and he tried to be there for me, but I was a little resentful because I knew he was happy this had ended. Anyway, my weakness got the best of me and I unblocked her on FB and whatsapp to see is she also blocked me- she didn't, so it gave me some hope.

She saw that I unblocked her on whatsapp and she video called me. I was completely shocked and confused and when we started talking we realized there was a huge miscommunication and she did not dump me, she was just upset and was "done" with the conversation. So I spent all day cleaning the house and made dinner to soften the blow when my husband got home and I told him what happened. I asked him at what capacity he'd allow C to be in my life and even if it was just talking to her I'd take it. He wasn't happy that we reconnected and we had an argument, but he said he was okay with us talking.

But then C said she needed some space to reevaluate herself and basically that I shouldn't message her unless it was important. I told her I could do that and that I was just happy knowing she didn't hate me.

But now I've spent the last few days compulsively checking my phone and seeing when C was last online, etc. I just want to talk to her but I don't want to impose on the boundaries she's set. But I think about her constantly. I wake up anxious because she used to call me every morning and wake me up. My husband and I are going to couples counseling next week and he's willing to still try polyamory, but he does not want it to be with her.

She's probably better off without me because this back and forth isn't fair to her, but I'd do anything short of leaving my husband to be with her.

I know how insane this sounds because this literally all happened within a month and I shouldn't be so attached to someone I've only seen in person 3 times. But I fell in love with my husband after only 2 weeks of dating, so this isn't completely abnormal for me.

Thanks for reading if you've made it this far ❤

TL;DR Within a month: My husband gave me permission to explore my sexuality. I found out I'm bi and polyamorous and I've fallen in love with a woman. We've broken up twice and my husband does not like her. He's still willing for us to try polyamory, but he just doesn't want me with her. She's now not talking to me and I feel horrendously lonely because of it. We're going to go to therapy.

Submitted August 03, 2020 at 01:05AM by AspiringOtaku via reddit https://ift.tt/31b5rBT

#IFTTT #reddit

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serialfirstdater · 6 years

Text

The Commercial Estate Computer Programmer

Guy #19

Finally, 2018 dates woo. I don’t need to label the year in the titles anymore, yay! This one took awhile to post because once again, I had a lot to write (literally started this post when the last one went up...) . Plus I had some writer’s block and just didn’t feel like finishing up the post. However, my dating life is picking up again and I need to catch the fuck up.

I matched with Commercial Estate Computer Programmer (CECP) on OkCupid but wasn’t exactly keen on his appearance. He wasn’t terrible looking, but wasn’t my type normally. He claimed that he was taller than me and seemed to have his life in order, so that made the cut for my swiping requirements.

Our first date was at a cafe. I saw him from afar when I was headed to our meeting spot and saw that he looked better irl. He was well-dressed and well-groomed (yaasss). I could tell that he had expensive taste, and although it’s not a requirement, it’s a huge bonus regardless. We ended up in Starbucks because the original cafe we wanted to go to was packed.

The moment I sat down, I knew he took a liking to me. It doesn’t take a lot to tell that someone is really into you, even though you just met. I expected him somewhat awkward, just from the conversations we had previously online. Surprisingly he wasn’t at all. He immigrated from Mainland China when he was 18 so he still had an accent. I understood him just fine and recognized that there may have been some language barrier through text, hence me thinking that he was awkward originally.

CECP didn’t spare the compliments. He brought up how incredibly in shape I was for someone who loved food. I guess he thought people who love food would be a lot bigger? He mentioned how much prettier I was in real life and wasn’t afraid to express his interest in me. I think it’s an Asian thing where men like to compliment women as much as possible. I wasn’t used to it, but it was an experience nonetheless.

He checked off the requirements for a second date. It was interesting to finally be the person who was less invested. If you know me, I tend to be the one who falls head over heels for someone. (Maybe to a lesser degree now than I was two years ago, but I’m usually the overly invested one). The first date didn’t last beyond an hour and a bit, because we only had coffee and I was fine letting things unfold on the second date. He expressed his disappointment for not being able to see me longer. He reminded me almost like a puppy. Super eager, ready to please.

CECP originally wanted to have the second date on Wednesday. I rejected the idea immediately and asked to see him two days later. He didn’t mention Valentine’s Day but it fell on that Wednesday this year and I knew where he was getting at. Valentine’s Day to me is meant for couples or people that have been dating for some time. It was NOT a second date situation. At least for me. I had a friend exclaimed that I should have let him spoil me for Valentine’s Day.

He agreed to meet on Friday and then asked if he could drive me afterwards because he didn’t want me to go home so late by myself (what a gentleman!). I said yes.

A couple of days before our date, my friend wanted to see how he looked like. I sent him CECP’s Facebook profile as per his request. He was like, “Er, SFD, did you read his wall? o.O”. I was like, “No...”

I immediately went to check and saw some posts he made. He made some comments about feminism and equal pay, how women shouldn’t expect to have men to spoil them but then expect to get paid the same amount in the workforce. Or something like that. Point is, it came off really immature and uneducated. He also wrote another wall post saying, “I hate Western-born Chinese who hate themselves! Hehe”. Reading his wall completely turned me off. Any interest I had in him then evaporated immediately.

I mentioned this to a couple of people. My cousin immediately said no. My coworker said I should give him a chance, as sometimes someone could be different offline. In the end, I decided to continue with the second date since I promised him. I felt bad if I cancelled on him. I thought maybe there was a chance he could redeem himself on the second date.

Friday came and I was dreading it since the night before. I knew he was going to try to woo me, without a doubt. And I had a feeling he would try to prolong the date as long as possible. Now, I’m a hopeless romantic. Typically, I don’t mind the wooing. But I don’t like it if I’m not interested in the person. I become super averse if someone tries to be affectionate to me when I’m not having it. It makes me cringe and dread all at once, praying they would stop.

I arrived to the British restaurant that he suggested, since apparently they made some amazing scotch eggs and I’ve never tried them before. Eager as a puppy, he happily chatted away without realizing that I was counting down the time for the food to arrive (40 gosh darn long minutes). When I’m no longer mentally engaged, my brain becomes a broken record. I keep repeating the same things over and over again, in different variations. I must have said something about the food we were eating at least 5 times.

Dinner wrapped up probably an hour and 15 minutes from start to finish. It felt like an eternity. Just as we were finishing up, CECP asked if I wanted to see the lights festival (not the one I went to with Sir Butter, but a different one). I told him it was late and I wanted to go home and rest since it was a long week. I knew I didn’t want to drag the date out any longer. I was uncomfortable with the fact that he was still very keen when I no longer found him to be a viable partner. He said okay but asked if we could take a walk so he could cool down before he drove me back. He was one of the many Asians that had the Asian glow after a glass of wine, so he wanted to make sure his face wasn’t as red once he started driving.

As we were walking, I made sure to go half a step faster than he did. I wanted to avoid any potential hand-holding or closeness while we were walking. We got to the red light and had to wait to cross the street, so he turned over and said, “Your hair is in the way.” He reached over and tried to brush a stray hair away from my face. I immediately jolted back from his touch and quickly swept the hair away myself, “Oh hahaha.” The moment the lights turned green, I immediately used my long-Amazonian legs (as an old friend once described them) to get across the street.

When we got to the other side and walking back to his car, he went, “Is your hand bigger than mine?” I knew where this was going. I pulled out my right hand and he awkwardly had to fumble out his left hand (mind you, I was walking on the right side of him). I barely placed my hand on his left hand before I shoved it back into my pocket, going “Yeah, I mean I’m a tall girl so the hands should match my height!” I was just dying to get into his car.

Once we sat down in his car, he said, “I didn’t want to come empty-handed” and I immediately panicked on the inside. He pulled out a single rose. Even though he knew I didn’t want to celebrate Valentine’s Day with him, he still wanted to give me something. Unfortunately, I couldn’t reject the gift. After all, he couldn’t return it! So I accepted it, despite exclaiming that he shouldn’t have and the dinner was already enough.

On the ride back to my place, we got the chance to talk. I made sure I placed my gym bag on my lap so he didn’t have the opportunity to try to reach over and hold my hand. During our conversation, I found out we had a lot of values and beliefs in common. It made me even more disappointed because it was already so hard to find someone who was willing to spoil me but have similar outlooks in life too. I had no feelings left for him and it was sad.

Just as he pulled up his car to my place, the garage door of my house slowly opened. My dad was coming home from work!! Luckily CECP ended up parking at the house beside mine by accident. I was freaking out and I told him I wanted to wait in the car until my dad went inside.

“Haha, well maybe I can introduce myself to your father,” he joked. Nu-uh. Hell to the no. I told him that my parents had no business in knowing my dating life and there was no way they would today.

“Can you park on the other side?” I asked, motioning to the houses opposite of mine. He politely obliged and parked across the street. I kept my eyes glued to the garage door. The moment it started going down, I turned to the CECP and said hurriedly, “Thank you for dinner and the rose! Have a great night!” I swooped up my belongings and jumped out of the car. I was in such a hurry that I almost slipped on black ice as it was still winter. I knew at that time he wanted to say something more, probably to tell me that he had a great time and he wanted to see me again. I just couldn’t allow it because I didn’t want to bring up the poor guy’s hope.

The next day, he sent me a text message asking if I was celebrating Chinese New Year. I saw it but didn’t respond until four hours later with a “Yup”. I hope that he got the hint.

Monday, he finally sent me a text saying, “I realize that this isn’t going to work out. Can you tell me what turned you off?”

I’m all about learning and improving oneself, so I admitted that I found his Facebook account and the content he had up was quite immature. Rather than being argumentative or defensive, he thanked me for the feedback and wished me luck. I was surprised how smoothly it went, though at the same time knowing how he was so far, he was very accommodating. I was truly bummed it didn’t work out but I know he would probably find a nice Asian girl to spoil soon enough.

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insecure-hbo-the-recaps · 7 years

Text

hella disrespectful

REMINDER/ALERT: Tumblr has locked me out of my original account and from now on I will be posting from this address. PLEASE FOLLOW ME HERE. Do me the additional favor of unfollowing the previous account though I have not yet figured out how to get Tumblr to delete these accounts that I am no longer able to access but that will probably simplify things a little, idk.

Previously on Insecure: "I don't want your conversation - get in my line up;" "Woot-Woot's dead;" "This whole open thing sounds super messy;" "I can't believe Issa's still out here seeing this dude;" "Did you really just do that in my fucking face?"

Issa's in the crib getting some moral support from Molly and I just gotta say I got kinda a bone to pick here:

Issa ain't riding no bike! You know damn well Issa ain't riding no bike! If she were she wouldn't be so fucked up after getting her car smashed. My ex lost a bunch of weight randomly biking all the time and I would get so worried about him biking in subzero temperatures. Getting worried about a partner was new to me, btw. I realized I never worried about it possibly happening that someone I was dating would die lol, like while I was dating him. He'd drop me off and I'd ask him to text me when he got home and if he didn't I'd wake up in the morning seriously thinking "omg what if he got in an accident and died last night?"

Molly is on Issa's team regarding the "surprise" facial. She wants Daniel to be fucked up on sight. Where is Molly? This room looks old fashioned and kitschy as fuck, and the headboard is different from the one she has at home. Issa doesn't want to see Daniel again, but that's not a problem for Molly, who wants to BRRRRR-TATTTT on Daniel with a water gun full of raw eggs.

Issa's pain is deeper though - she was trying to show Daniel that he was special to her and he embarrassed her. To be honest I am still having a hard time getting on the same page with Issa and her deeply insulted reaction to Daniel's surprise facial. On the other hand - I had that happen to me once and I literally never spoke to the guy again. Like in Issa's case, I assumed he did it on purpose... buuuuut, me and that guy kind of hated each other so it made sense. I guess I'm having a hard time relating to why Daniel would have done it and as such why Issa's so offended. It's a little contrived, I think, is what I'm saying. I repeat: a good dude wouldn't do this to you. So either Daniel is a good dude, or he's exposed that he's not. Accidental unwanted facials aren't a thing.

Molly is being a good friend, validating Issa's feelings, and ranting about how men watch too much porn and think that shit's ok. Molly possibly had an ulterior motive, because being in a safe space she feels ok to tell Issa she's still seeing Dro. "I thought that was a one and done?" Issa asks. "It's more like a seventeen and not stopping no time soon," Molly says, and SIGH. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS MOLLY? IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA. Why would she even want this? Aren't some men just generally off limits? Dro seems like the kind of guy, with the kind of history, that should just be not an option (particularly considering he's married). Issa still isn't buying that anyone, especially Molly, benefits from this alleged open relationship, which Molly is offended by. They are telling each other hard truths, softened by years of honest friendship, and although they aren't on the same page, they agree to love each other through the stupidity.

Yaaaas, bitch. Issa' still on the bus. She spots the latino kid again, who removes his backpack and Entemann's donuts to give her the seat. When he pulls out a PSAT prep, Issa sees an opening and tries to chat him up about the teacherly and tutorly pursuits her job offers. Surprisingly to both Issa, and the audience I think, the kid says he tried to go but was told by Mr. Gates that the program was full. Issa finally appears troubled by this now that she is confronted by someone she sort of deliberately left behind.

Lawrence Tech Start up. Lawrence is wearing a Santa Claus/footie pajama red thermal and it looks crazy. Colin the Clueless White Guy sidles up to him (in an equally ridiculous printed button up - buttoned all the way to the top naturally) and burgundy pants and makes small talk while Lawrence pours himself a coffee. Colin is all in Lawrence's business for no reason in a gotcha conversation that just serves to prove Lawrence and Arpant have been kicking on the side and trying to hide it at work. Cliffs notes they suck at it and their coworkers have sniffed them out.

Molly is riding around somewhere with Quintin in his wood grain Lexus. He brought her popcorn from Garrett's and while I appreciate the shoutout I've literally never heard of such a thing as RANCH in Garrett's - like - what? It's cheddar and caramel. Stick to the script. Don't try to be new and exciting. You tell someone in Chicago Garrett's is doing ranch popcorn and they will look at you wondering who lied to you. (Note to self: get some Garrett's for the first time since high school.) Molly tries it and is hooked. Quintin asks about Molly's "white boy" meeting: apparently she is going to shoot her shot and ask for the raise. Quintin says he's going to be in LA soon and asks Molly to show him around. Molly: a beat passes before she goes "mm, ok," because she understands the pass he has made at her.

SILICON VALLEY IS SO MILLENNIAL AND COOL. Lawrence is looking for Arpana to make amends for blowing their spot. Arpana does that thing of being possibly offended at keeping things a secret WHILE playing standoffish at the implication that they are anything to be kept secret. Hmmm. Bold move, Cotton. Let's see if that works out for her. Lawrence confirms drink plans, Arpana teases him, blah blah.

At the office, Issa seeks out Frieda and asks to talk. Frieda isn't all that interested, but then Issa presents some research on how to increase latino enrollment at their school. Issa beams at her in approval because apparently they thought of the same plan. Frieda is relieved that she and Issa are back on friendly wavelengths again, and asks where Issa's change of mind came from. Issa acknowledges that she's been lost in herself and Frieda was right. It's a good apology and Frieda is cool with it.

Meanwhile at Molly's Dro shows up with a bag of groceries and Molly's keys. He asks her if she wants them back and she says no. MOLLY. WHY. I DON'T GET IT. There are literally billions of available partners for you. What the fuck is the draw of being emotionally open to A MARRIED MAN? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? WHY DO YOU THINK THIS IS GOOD OR WILL WORK OUT? If you're going to fuck a married man in an open relationship ok, I guess, do you even though it's a thing on its own. But why are you trying to give the motherfucker your keys to your apartment? Christ, Molly. Molly gives Dro her bag of popcorn - that Quintin gave her - which cheapens the rapport Quintin was trying to build in that she tried to transfer it to Dro. I don't get it, Molly, truly.

They change subjects to Derek's birthday party and Molly sours at the knowledge that Dro's wife will be coming. Goddamn that man is tall. Look at him. He's like a basketball player.

ISsa gets a text from Tiffany who wants to know if it's cool that Lawrence is coming to the party. Issa screenshots and sends to Molly who is also offended at Tiffany springing Lawrence out of nowhere. This prompts Issa to check Lawrence's facebook, where she learns he has blocked her. She is really pissed about Lawrence taking their five year relationship to the brink of actually blocking her on facebook, resulting in another angry mirror rap. But she plays it off to Molly.

Law firm. Molly is sitting in front of a panel of three general pale men, pleading her case. She is cool and confident, all Law of Attractioning that she's going to receive the value she deserves. She parries their comebacks with all the agility of Serena. The partners agree with her, but are a bunch of stingy bastards that want to put her off as long as they are able to - they agree with her pitch and simply offer that it will be taken into consideration at her yearly review. And ain't that some bullshit? The idea of wielding that kind of bias because you understand you are bartering with someone that may not have the collateral to be as competetive as she could be. Stupid generic white boy Travis that is already making significantly more than Molly could walk into this meeting and be a threat if he suggested he'd leave because he isn't being paid fairly. When you're a black woman - what's she gonna do? Quit? She should be grateful she has the clout of such an establishment lended to her. Yadda yadda yadda, BULLSHIT.

At the school, Issa has not only decided what has been happening with their program is wrong, she decides she has to confront Principal Gates with it. She tells him they are discriminating and he asks what the problem is being the program is full - "now you're coming up to me with some 'All Lives Matter'?" Ouch. Frieda tries to step in and Gates looks at her, offended. Issa tells him that the latino students are being turned away and it isn't far. Gates again plays the "your tone is offensive/it's not that big a deal/calm down" argument and literally laughs in her face and walks away.

Lawrence forgot about Derek's party and wants to switch drinks with Arpana from 7 to 10. Yeah, no, Lawrence. He tells her his ex would be there and for some reason Arpana offers to go. That's a little messy. Like, have drinks the next day. Why insert yourself?

Back at Issa's, she's wearing a crazy dress getting ready to go to the party and Daniel calls. He wants to apologize and move on but Issa is still mad. She offers vulnerability and asks why he'd do that to her of all people. Daniel seems contrite enough as he asks for forgiveness - even tacking on a "please," and Issa visibly softens. She tells him she hates him which of course is female for "I love you."

Issa asks why their thing is always messy and Daniel, overestimating the strength of their reconciliation, offers that now they're even; he equates what he did to squaring things after Issa dogged him at the charity event last year. And honestly.... I mean, i won't ever condone an unwanted facial, but Issa did get off the hook pretty scott free for telling Daniel he was just an itch she had to scratch and don't tell her boyfriend because their shit was nothing comparatively. Like, Issa had to have known that was scoring points on him too. So, I'm gonna call this a wash. Issa is mad all over again that Daniel intentionally humiliated her, calls him disrespectful and petty, and tells him not to ever call her again. She stomps to her brother's car pissed off, who is apparently accompanying her to the party tonight.

At Derek's party, Kelli brought that random ass dude she met the other night - and good for her. Relationships can start just as well from the club as anywhere else - and for some reason Molly is wearing a black dress with random red armbands attached. And Tiffany is so fucking extra bougie as usual, like, she is simply not a sympathetic character. I can't with her Lori Greiner blonde wig and gratuitous bragging about how much she loves her man. How is anyone friends with her?

Anyway there is a random aside about how Kelli thought "Sweetie" was just going to be some strange, but she's meeting his parents at the mosque next week. Okey dokey. Dro shows up with his wife. While she's getting a drink he takes a moment to compliment Molly in Spanish. Remember Eric Jerome Dickey on Black People in California and how you could tell a black woman was upwardly mobile if she was fluent in spanish? (I have a friend who works in IR who once commented offhandedly that you only need to know spanish to liaise with poor people, and if you want to mingle with the wealthy you need to know French and/or Chinese. At the time I thought it was horribly offensive but now I know she was right.) Candace is awkward around Molly which does suggest she is aware and knows that her open marriage has led to her husband sleeping with this woman. Also this is apparently Dro's favorite dress which explains that, I suppose. Candace is wear a feathered burgundy cape, affixed to her shoulders with, apparently, double sided tape. I repeat: okey dokey.

Oh damn. That space is nice:

Tiffany signals for an extra toast, clinging the glass with a knife, to announce dinner is served. She makes Molly move from the seat she chose, putting her awkwardly seated at the head of the table. Issa and her brother arrive, and he's such a good buffer. Issa makes note of Candace and checks in with Molly about it. "What's up with y'all?" her brother asks. "Nothing, I'm fine, she grown," Issa says in one breath.

Lawrence's ridiculous ass shows up - in a nice denim button up - trying to ignore everyone aghast at him bringing a random date to this friends only event. He claims he didn't know it would be a sit down event, and everyone awkwardly makes room to accommodate his guest. See? Extra. None of this needed to happen. Lawrence decides to address the elephant in the room and introduces Arpana, who makes a crack about knowing how awkward she's made things. Yeah, that doesn't work when you knew full well in advance the circumstances were going to be awkward. But everyone is adults and they try to laugh it off. Issa orders a whiskey.

Mid-dinner. They are having lovely pretentious cultural conversation. When Molly tries to chime in everyone ignores her. She feels very left out and alone. J from ABG asks Lawrence why he's there, basically, and has to be informed that they all know each other because Lawrence is Issa's ex. By the next cut of passage of time, Issa is drunk.

The dinner continues awkwardly: Tiffany is fucking annoying, Issa's brother is a bitchy gay, and Issa is poor. Nobody's showcasing their best self, I think. When the conversation shifts to Issa's building being sold, there is a moment of Lawrence openly pining about how he and Issa used to live together. When Tiffany makes a toast to "the Barack to her Michelle" - so extra - Issa drunkenly comments about Lawrence's random. Enough being enough, Issa walks out. Lawrence follows. Oh boy.

He lies that he wouldn't have brought Arpana if he knew Issa would be there. She calls him out as being full of shit and tells him she knows he's just parading that girl in front of their friends. Also, she knows that he blocked her. Lawrence admits it, because he couldn't "stand to see pictures of the nigga you fucked" while they were together. The fact that Issa wasn't the one who posted them - parading around someone in Lawrence's face as it were - and that he accuses her of still fucking Daniel, as if that's any of his business, is more than enough to clarify that Lawrence is in the wrong here. It's all about his hurt feelings and what Issa did to him or owes him; that she would still be wronging him to see someone else after they broke up. He's bullshit, basically.

When Issa doesn't refute this, Lawrence lets his insecure flag fly freely and asks who else she fucked while they were together. Issa's voice breaks as she asks whether he's serious, especially since he fucked her while he was dating his bank teller. "And being some fake music producer's jump off is better?" Lawrene spits back. And... jump off? Are we still saying that? Also, he's hitting way below the belt whereas Issa was not. This is something that I suppose is an inherent misogyny in the black community that frankly at this point is no longer normal to me and is almost unforgivably egregious. So at this point I don't blame Issa for hitting back that Daniel has "way more going on than Woot Woot."

They both know that Issa has hit him below the belt now too, so they both go for broke: Issa asks whether all this was worth her supporting him for two years while he was depressed, and Lawrence counters that it is worth about as much as all the time she "spent being a fuckin' ho." And, again. Maybe I'm too far removed. But I can't see having anything else to do with someone who showed up with, I'm sorry it has to be said, an exotical to your black friendship group, calling your ex girlfriend a ho, and stomping off in a petulant rage. You couldn't come back from that for me, but that's just me. If you want to make the argument that Issa cheating on Daniel is equivalent to Lawrence mooching off Issa and doing nothing with his life with two years (WHO WAS PAYING ALL THOSE LIFESTYLE BILLS, MOTHERFUCKER?) and trying to hurt her by flaunting a new relationship in her face, I may be biased, but I don't think there's much room for redemption there.

Back at the party, Molly follows Dro to the bathroom and he already knows where her head is. Molly admits she wasn't expecting not being able to see him with his wife, and how left out she feels knowing that he won't ever be that way with her. Being someone's dirty little secret isn't fun. Dro convinces her that they have something too, and she lets him fuck her on the bathroom sink. I hope I am never this desperate for affection. And I'm not being hard on Molly, really. But I think she's being very foolish with her emotions and it's hard for me to understand why she would put herself in this position, knowingly aware every step of the way that she's setting herself up for failure. Case in point: Dro asks her to wait for a moment and let him leave the bathroom first. Still, inexplicably, Molly is hurt by this. Girl, please. You wanna play that big girl's game, but on your big girl panties then. She steps out to find Issa waiting for the bathroom. Issa wordlessly straightens Molly's bangs and zips up her dress and Molly thanks her, for her nonjudgment.

Lawrence is driving Arpana back and she asks whether he still wants to get drinks. He doesn't answer.

Molly finally calls her mom back, and tells her she just needed some time. She asks why Mom stayed with Dad, and Mom replies that she just loves him. Apparently Molly is in the same headspace and asks how she deals with the hurt. I don't want to be redundant and point out that Molly's hurt is unreasonable, because on some level I do suppose that's insensitive. But, I just don't have any sympathy for this. We all do shitty things. But you can't ask me to feel bad for the consequences of your shitty things when you are fully aware what you are doing is harmful to you. If I'm doing something that hurts, I figure my options are to keep doing it and stop whining, or to stop fucking doing it. When she gets home, Molly responds to Dro's scheduling text that she can't do this anymore but we all know it rings hollow.

Issa comes home to a letter on her door informing her of her rent increase, and it's finally too much.

Her experimenting with ho-ness turned out to be a bigger blow to her self esteem than she could handle, and she's clearly stung behind Lawrence calling her a ho. That's what she was trying to do, right? But in reality it didn't work out so well. Her side pieces were not pliable enough, the one guy she was seeing relatively seriously compared to the others deliberately humiliated her, and her ex that she had partially built a life with devalued the time they spent by diminishing her as the thing she was afraid of being seen as - a tool, a joke, a ho. She kicks a chair then just lashes out entirely, breaking dishes, throwing tables, smashing furniture.

#issa rae #insecure hbo

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