#aaaaa always a pleasure rose!

[antisociallilbrat]

It's Mike time baby, he needs some love

-Mike and Bill take scenic drives all the time. In the book Mike's dad would send him to different places around Derry to find or see cool or interesting things and because of that Mike found a lot of great views and he and Bill would take his truck to those spots and just read or talk or cuddle together. Mike is a very astute observer of his friends and so whenever he notices that something's bothering Bill, he whisks him away to these beautiful spots he finds.

-Bev loves to take Mike on days out. She calls them "Adventures". She loves finding new restaurants or coffee shops they've never been to or seeing indie movies she's never heard of at local theaters. Even in a clown-less universe, Mike still spent a lot of his formative years working on the farm instead of having fun so she's trying to make up for that now for him.

-Mike and Eddie take random classes all the time. They love picking up new skills. It started when Eddie got everyone CPR certified and they saw an ad for a cooking class on the way out and they're the only ones interested. Then follows knitting and gardening and dance and so on.

-Mike and Richie both took a gap year before heading to college. They didn't feel ready and so instead they went on a cross-country road trip together. Mike had seen so little in his life and he was so excited. Richie took enough polaroids to fill two albums and was in charge of the music. Mike picked all the stops and was adamant they see every dumb local attraction they could.

-Stan gets Mike incredibly invested in birdwatching as a hobby. At first Stan thought he kept offering to go with him because he's kind, but Mike eventually started getting his own gear and his own bird book, he packed them lunches, and then he found them a local group of birdwatchers for them to join. They stand out a bit as 20-somethings in a group made up of seniors, but that doesn't bother them. Stan still insists they go with just each other about half of the time though.

-One year for Mike's birthday, Ben built him a chicken coop in their backyard. He knew that Mike was happy to be in the city with his friends, but that he was definitely a bit homesick for the farm. Ben helped him hatch some chicks and raise them. They both cried tears of joy when their first chick hatched. Each of the Losers got to name one. The Loser's cook only with Mike's eggs from that day forward.

Rose everytime you grace my inbox it's absolute blessing- and to bring some love for Mike while you're at it <33 aaaaa okay okay

-Mike is so the guy to take long rides to clear his head and I'm happy to think about him including Bill on them. Sometimes they talk, sometimes they listen to music, and other times they just drive in silence with the windows rolled down and breathing in all that open space

-I read this point and the first thing that popped into my head was that 'treat yourself' meme and yes these two do that. They treat themselves to new restaurants and experiences but i can also see them being thrift shop buddies? They've definitely done the bit where you go to like goodwill and pick out silly outfits for the person you're with. They have a good time with it

-Eddie and Mike taking random classes is top tier. Yes they both know how to make pottery, knit, scrapbook and they've taken at least one intro class of a foreign language. It's just fun and sometimes they'll flip a coin to see what's the next class they're going ot.

-Speaking of scrapbooking that came in real handy with this one. Mike and Richie taking a cross country road trip aaaa. I can see Mike sitting in the passenger seat with a map and circling every little tourist trap he wants to go to and him and Richie both being genuinely excited over the littlest things, it's such a sweet image <3

-Stan and Mike birdwatching :( Mike loves animals so of course he'd actually get excited about this and the boy already loves to learn so he eat ups every fact Stan gives him about birds. And honestly these are the two losers that would hang out with a group of seniors- it's very on brand for them. Stan already dresses like an old man and all the old ladies love Mike bc he's so charming. Stan may or may not be jealous.

-Something about how Mike and Ben are already kinda seen as the 'mother hens' of the losers and then them raising actual chickens...and yes Mike has all the kisses for Ben when he sees that chicken coop and the chicks they hatch might as well be their actual children let's be honest

[lokisgoodgirl]

DEAREST I HAVE A LOVE LETTER!

My love letter goes to @holdmytesseract because other than your gloriousness, darling, she was my introduction to fanfictions here! 🌹 We recently started to chat and I have to say, it's wonderful to share ideas and help in any way I can or get help myself or just have a nice chat! ☕🙇

I am so proud that you have reached a year because that means in only a few short weeks, we'll have known each other a year and what a wonderful year it has been! 🥰 🫂

Thank you, love you so much 💐🪻

~LRM

AAAAA!!!!🥰🥰🥰 So much love for our darling Maddie and I am HERE FOR IT! Yes yes yes a thousand times. Speaking with her is always such a pleasure, there's a reason she can't get rid of me 🙇😂 She gives so much I'm delighted she's getting all this virtual smooching.

This is such a precious Love Note @lady-rose-moon - thank you so much for giving our wonderful @holdmytesseract such a sweet message, you're amazing.

[saudade-mayari]

💜hi Luna!! Can I please request service 2, (the room number part confused me I’m so sorry I wanted to pick nsfw if I can🥺), with Itachi? However you wanna do it full creative freedom, and I’m so sorry again if I didn’t do this right!

Check out Hēdonē's Masterlist!

💳—Hēdonē VIP [27] || Little Uchiha

⇥ Itachi Uchiha x wife!reader || wc: 1.3k

⇥ warnings: 18+ content, established relationship, cunnilingus, teasing, breeding kink, shameless smut, minors please dni

⇥ a/n: Thoughts off. Just Itachi brainrot aaaaa

You let out a warm smile as you assist the couple on their booked room and private Onsen. Your heart fluttered, suddenly missing the intimate moments you had with your husband.

You felt the temperature of your body rising up, your core feeling the sudden uneasiness. You know that you have been neglecting your duty as a wife, and Itachi has always been so considerate on letting you run the Onsen. He knows it’s your dream to run your own business.

Although living at Uchiha District is beyond good, almost living here is nice as well. You got sweet staff, great company and a loving husband always visiting and giving you bento boxes despite being busy as the future clan head.

You bit your lip by the sudden throb in your core so you let the other workers take over the reception area as you decide to rest at your personal room in the Onsen. Just for a while.

You've loosen your Kimono's obi as you push down your underwear, touching your wet cunt. Closing your eyes while you rub it in circular motion with harder pressure.

You moan the name of your husband, feeling the pleasure of your own fingers. The heat kept rising up and you kept thrusting in and out.

"Ohh fuck-" creamy liquid came out and you licked your own juice.

But something feels empty, maybe the warmth? Or perhaps Itachi himself.

Not feeling satisfied, you took your pillow and you decided to ride on it. You kept grinding hard, the friction of your core to the pillowcase kept you aroused. "Oh... Kami!!"

Wave after wave of pleasure, you felt your second climax building up but a knock interrupted it.

Letting out a growl, you continue grinding on the edge of your pillowcase, desperately trying to reach your disturbed climax

"Who is it?! What is it?!"

"Ma'am y/n... The customer from room 101 has a complaint."

You shot a glare again, still not opening the door. "Make a resolve! You know what to do!!"

"But Uchiha-san... He wishes to see the manager, he said you know him." You stopped. You had no choice but to tend the customer.

You stood up and opened the door, your worker obviously scared with the glare you are giving. Letting out a heavy sigh, you tapped her shoulder "I'll handle it. You go home. I'll take charge."

Hesitating to knock, but you still did it anyways. However, the one opened the door was the person you least to expect.

He was holding your favourite flower, wearing a formal Uchiha Hakama. Your husband.

You were both shocked.

Itachi stared at you. Out of anger, you almost forgot to fix yourself and you left your kimono's obi back in your room. You looked so messed up, your thighs are showing, your exposed cleavage and collarbones are visible to his eyes

“Wife, is everything okay?” Itachi asks, kissing your forehead as he hands out your favourite flower. You bit your lip. You were imagining him, and now he is damned here.

“I- uh.. sleeping.” You stutter, but the raven-haired let out a husky chuckle, almost swearing to yourself how hot he sounds. It feels like he did it intentionally.

“Come on. I did something for you.” He said, kissing your lips before he holds your hand and entered the room you never accommodated.

Rose petals and dim scented candle lights makes your pathways and a table for two stood before you and your husband. A dinner that is obviously prepared by Itachi. You gasped.

“Honey.. did you..” You ask, looking back and forth on the setup and the raven-haired man. He rubbed his nape, giggling as he holds your waist to pull you closer his body.

“Was about to surprise you for a dinner but can I ask did I disturbed you from something?" He whispers, hinting as if he knows what you did. You smirked.

No point of hiding your own pleasure to the man your husband right?

"You did. Big time, but forgiven since you’re here already. Thank you for this honey… Let’s eat?”

He smirks and starts to trace your collarbone with his lips. You let out a faint whimper "Care to tell what’s the disturbance you’re talking about?"

You held the hem of his Hakama, slowly taking it off as you palm his now hardened erect, temporarily forgetting the dinner he prepared.

"You… are the distraction." You answered, kissing his cheeks as he continues tracing every sensitive part of your body.

"I was about to say the same. Coming here with that look? Don’t do that again, what if I’m not the one on this room." He says before the bites your neck, sucking and leaving a love mark.

Itachi held you tighter and without preliminaries he kissed your lips as he removes your Kimono. He is dominant and aggressive. It fucking turned you on.

You kissed back, revealing your breasts and bare sex to his naked eye. He smirked

"Of course, my pretty wife tried to pleasure herself" Itachi says, cupping your femininity as he teased it with one of his fingers.

You need it. More of it, but you don’t want to waste all his preparations. "Honey.. The dinner ah-"

“I choose to have my dessert first.” He finally whispers, and softly slams your back at the soft bed filled with roses.

Itachi starts by licking your stomach, down to your navel and his majestic eyes stares at you with love and lust. “So wet for me…” He coos, kissing your inner thighs to tease you more.

The pressure on your sex with the way he moves his fingers to your clit makes you dripping wet. He smiled, giving your inner thighs a kiss before he went to lick your clit in an upward manner. You whimpered

“Tachi…”

You receive no response. He kept licking hard while his fingers continues to do its job. It’s ecstatic. Only Itachi could make you feel like this and you feel your release coming.

“Ah.. Fuck!” The unbearable pleasure of release made you see stars while Itachi licks you clean, like his dessert, like a work of art.

This time he takes off the rest of his clothes, revealing his aching and throbbing cock. His hand went to peg your wrist above your head while the other stroked his erection.

"See this y/n? you want me in your little cunt?" You nodded and bit your lip.

He looked at you with lust as he enters the head of his cock. Slowly and filled with tease. It was euphoric, but agonizingly frustrating. You want him whole.

“Tachi please… I need you.” You moaned but he answered with a hungry growl. Giving you a kiss on your forehead as he went inside your welcoming and wet folds.

You arched your back on him, hitting your most sensitive spot while as he held your wrist tighter, not letting go and pushing inside and out with a pace fast pace.

"I'm going to cum all over you until we make our Little Uchiha. You hear me?"

It was hard, but also warm and it is very much enraptured. Even answering is hard and it made your husband growl. He is demanding and dominant.

—and you love every part of it.

“I asked if you have heard me, wife.” He went deeper and his paces starts to get faster. You know both of you are to reach your climax and the scream of pleasure can be heard from the four corners of the room.

“I- yes.. Itachi.. inside.. all of it” You barely answered. Messy moans, panting and erratic breathing left your mouth as he did his final thrust. His release came inside you and it never felt so satisfying.

“I love you” He murmurs while smiling in between the kiss you both shared.

The way he helped you is filled with care as if you are like a fragile being. Everything about Itachi is too sweet, and domestic for your sight.

Something he always does for his family.

Wrapping the silk robe around your body, he smiles and kiss your forehead.

“Let’s start thinking of our Little Uchiha’s name while having dinner.”

[watermelon-converse]

answer all of them then! no reason to restrict yourself if you wanna do them all 👀 (if you feel like it ofc)

hErE wE gO /pos

1. From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)

hmm, three? four if I’m being serious

2. Why do you write fanfiction

because I’m bored as heck and have way too many ideas

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

I get super into it and plan everything out before I start. is insane actually

4. Are there any writers that inspire you?

all of them. Lex, in particular, @your-local-hurt-comfort-junkie-1 , is so good at writing I can’t even TvT

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

an undisclosed Tangled AU that took me two years. It’s not shared yet lol

6. What element of writing do you find comes easily?

banter, no question. It just comes lol

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most?

action omg. I can’t do it XD

8. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write?

happy characters or ones in pain. No inbetween.

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write?

evil characters are hard hhh. I want to make them nuanced! Have depth! If I’m writing fic with a character who doesn’t have that, I’m tempted to put it in, even if I don’t plan to have them in for more that a chapter.

10. What’s your favorite genre to write for?

f- fluff?

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

tangled heh

12. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about.

doing a tangled band Au actually 👀

13. First fandom you ever wrote for?

Ramona and Beezus, I was six. Yes no that’s the truth

14. What’s your favorite fandom to write for?

I want to discover more than tangled lol, I’m getting into amphibia fic now

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for?

ramona and beezus probably

16. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)?

cheese. Anything that is cheesy, be it fluff, drama, etc. you will cringe as you laugh/cry/pine

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

centaur-ification? idk

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written?

im working on it

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between?

AUs are so fun! They have so many possibilities while still being typical to the characters

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff?

both; shippy but plot-centric

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

:sob: cassunzel

and sashannearcy heh

22. Do you listen to anything while you write?

I usually have music on anyway lol

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas?

independent - it gives me more time

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

one shots are fun and come naturally, but. Longer things call to me

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

omg yes! But it’s for the long one 👀 do i want to spend another two years doing that 👀

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

not really

27. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?

once someone told me they would be heartbroken if I stopped writing 🥺

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing?

pretty well! I need it lol

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

writing for characters Im not good with is hard. I’ve always learned from it, though.

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

F L U F F

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

Nope!

32. Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less.

The Crystal Gems (Old Skool, with Rose) play baseball

33. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?

I care so much about my fics - so much aaaaa

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

from my Owl House fic, Mad but Sad Boy:

“Is that … really a thing? Genuinely good people? People who would make Hunter, not mad or sad, but just … okay?

Maybe even … happy?

He notes how happily Amity Blight talked about Luz. How much laughter there was between the Owl Lady and her pet rat. How much … warmth Hunter gets from this tiny little bird.

“Dang it,” Hunter mutters.

The palisman looks at him gently.

“Wanna go watch some Steven Universe?” Hunter sighs, giving in to his heart for once. For once, all he wants is to feel warm with a friend.

His friend peeps in agreement.

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

LeX YouR fiC iS bReAkINg mE iN tHe bEsT wAyyYyYyYyYyYyY

[raahosh]

Pls mor x reader fluff 🥺 where they’re getting ready together to meet the inner circle for the first time 💞

Type: Mor x reader.

Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses.

Warnings: There's a lot of fluff.

Authors note: AAAAA I can't believe someone requested it, Mor is my crush since the first page Rhysand introduced her, it's going to be a pleasure make sa x reader about her. Thank you so much, sweet.

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, it was really hot and Velaris was a really beautiful city. You still can't believe there's such a magical place in Prythian. You've met a lot of Courts, all of them with their history, monuments, cities but this one is different, this one is your mate's home.

Mor was gorgeous, as always, but today was odd, she was prettier than ever. First you didn't know why but then she looked at you and you knew this was about what was going to happen today. You and Mor have dated for almost three years now, you have always been patient with her because you know she wasn't ready to come out for her friends yet. You, on the other hand, was assumed for the entire world.

"You're gorgeous, my love, I think I'm going to have to risk our punctuality." Your voice echoed through the room.

Mor giggled. "Stop, I'm working on something, you're going to make me mess up my makeup."

She was applying her eyelash mask in front of the mirror and comparing one eye with the other when you said it. The smile on her face just grew bigger and she closed the product in her hands. "Can you pass me the lipstick?" She asked.

You grabbed the red lipstick in your bag and walked closer to her. Before you gave her you just touched her chin and pulled it for a kiss. Your lips met hers and you shared that quick moment before you handled her the thing she requested.

It was visible for everyone around that Mor was radiant, she couldn't stop smiling, she was always really polite with people but today was different. Mor knew why she was feeling like that and it wasn't just because of Y/N, for the first time she wasn't feeling bad at herself, for the first time she felt belonging to somewhere. She doesn't just found her mate, today was the day she'd be able to tell her family what she really is.

"You seem happy." You smiled at her and she gave you a look that made your heart melt.

"I can't even imagine why I am feeling like this." She said ironically.

Y/N rolled her eyes in between a laugh and moved away from Mor. She grabbed the eyelash mask that Mor left on the table and started to apply it on her own lashes. You always had those moments just getting ready together and that was one of Mor's favorites.

The Inner Circle was really excited to know Y/N. They noticed that Mor was happier than she was those days, she was brighter and smiling all the time. Of course they wanted to know why and Cassian was the first to ask, in Cassian's way but he asked something like "With who are you banging?". Even Azriel was happy when she told she was dating someone.

About the Azriel's thing, Azriel had stopped his obsession with Mor a long time ago and that was another reason why she was happy. The relief she felt on the day she noticed that wasn't small.

After Y/N finished she came closer from Mor and looked at her in the mirror in front of both of them. "Are you sure you want to do it?" Your hands traced it ways on Mor's arms and you leaned to kiss her ear, going down to her neck and then her shoulder.

"Are you kidding? I've never been this ready in my whole life. I'm going to introduce the love of my life to my family, the family I found. I couldn't be happier now, Y/N." She turned around to see you and you felt your heart stop beating for a couple of seconds.

"I love it when you're happy. You can do whatever man or woman kneel before you just with a smile." Your hand went to meet her cheek and you caressed it for a bit.

"Isn't odd you're my mate, moments like this make me realize it even more." She giggled and then kissed you.

Your lips touched softly, you continued to caress her cheek and her arms went to wrap around your waist. While your mouths collide and your tongues intertwine you felt a shiver going up your spine and this was what made you smile slightly.

"Let's go before you give Cassian a chance to make a joke about 'We lingering because we were banging', and trust me you won't want to give him this chance."

"You wanna know what? I think I'm going to like this Cassian guy." You listened to her laugh and your smile grew bigger. Y/N was never going to say it out loud but she loved when Mor laughed, she knew her history, she knew everything Mor have been through and she wanted to make her the happiest.

[kookiecrumb]

Hi! I'm the Anon that asked for tips to describe myself, so thank you for that!

If you're still doing ships, I would love one!

---

I'm someone who's a supporter and a collaborator. I like to take leadership roles but even in my leadership, I'm usually looking to support other people in the group and help them in any way I can. I'm the eldest daughter and I'm also the mom friend. I'm a really good listener; when you're talking, my head is nodding to every word and I will verbally assure you that I'm listening. I'm quite outgoing with the people I know, and not afraid to have a laugh (a little too loud sometimes). Even with the people I don't know, I will tend to strike up a conversation. I tend to compliment random strangers. I have a broad sense of humor so I can laugh at anything, even bad jokes or childish humor.

But, sometimes I don't really know how to comfort people except tell them that I'm sorry they're going through whatever they're going through. My type of comfort-giving is usually action-based in that I give advice (still working on not doing this all the time, but rather sitting with the person while they're feeling whatever they're feeling). I'm also an overthinker, especially when it comes to my and others' emotions. Being a supporter sucks when you're constantly giving the benefit of the doubt to other people instead of validating yourself lol. I have many friends but I have a hard time (impossible, even) forming deep, long-lasting friendships because I can't seem to let my guard down ever (unless I'm alone in my room). I'm a procrastinator and I'm tired of procrastinating because it's gotten really bad this past academic year but I can't seem to stop.

On a happier note, moving right along to my achievements. I won my school's spelling bee in 8th grade so I'm pretty proud of myself for that one because I'd been participating for four years by then. I was also an intern for a graphic designer. Another thing I'm proud of is being on the board of and involved with a university student organization that means a lot to me.

I love to paint and read, and sometimes I write (usually fanfic and occasionally poems). I also like to do graphic design. I love watching and reading romance (the fluffier and angstier the better) thrillers, and mysteries. Recently I've been hooked on Snowdrop on Disney+ (I seriously recommend it if you're into romance, action, slow-burn, and mutual pining).

I like to travel as well. I'm definitely a stop-and-smell-the-roses kinda gal and I enjoy the simple pleasures like natural floral scents when I'm walking on campus. Essentially I enjoy Namjooning lol. My favorite season is spring (even if I have pollen allergies).

My favorite apps are Pinterest, Instagram, Wattpad, and Tumblr (though I'm in an off/on relationship with Tumblr). My favorite colors are light pink, lilac, and lavender.

As for my cultural background, I'm/my family is Indian, but I'm also American because I was born and raised and still live in the U.S. Specifically, I'm from Tamil Nadu in South India, and I LOVE Indian food, but I'll eat anything. I'm a non-vegetarian. I'm also Muslim.

I don't really know how to describe my style but I do dress girly and wear Indo-Western fusion outfits. Maybe I'd consider my style feminine with an edgy touch. Since I'm Muslim, I wear full-sleeved and full-length loose-fitting clothing. Wide legged jeans and pants are a staple in my wardrobe. I love a good flowy dress. I also prioritize being comfortable so you won't often catch me in heels or restricting clothing. I also like to wear rings, chokers or small necklaces, and big earrings.

Here are some examples pictures of outfits I'd wear:

---

I hope this was helpful, and I sincerely apologize for how long this got!!! Thank you again for doing ships, I can't wait to see mine!

AAAAA salaam alaikum and Ramadan Mubarak to you!

You'd be best friends first 🤭 those are always the best relationships.

You need someone who would put you in the spotlight and clearly that isn't going to be a difficult feat for this match. You shine very brightly and whoever they are will need to compliment your light and ease your worries.

Someone to break you out of your shell, someone who truly gets you. You are a listener, because I feel like you love to know people. You seek out the natural pleasures of life and enjoy the more simple things.

You have a creative edge, it looks like. You'll need someone who encourages your leadership and is proud of your assertiveness, AKA someone who lacks insecurity in that aspect.

Furthermore, I ship you with...

Jimin!

It would be quite the surprise when he'd show up with a proposal. There would have always been an energy between you two, but he would be hesitant to act on it in case you were already waiting on somebody.

Aestheically, he would compliment you very well. He'd encourage your growth and progress at work and he'd reward you greatly as your husband. Although Jimin is career-driven, he would encourage his spouse to do the same and match his standard.

He overthinks as well, and so long as you two can relate to one another about it and connect to problem-solve within the relationship, it would be harmonious.

Although Jimin does strike me as the city-type, I don't think he would mind at all partaking in retreats and vacations with his spouse, so long as he can make as many memories as possible with you.

Your shared appreciation for art and design would be a nice compliment. You'd have no trouble decorating the house together.

Jimin's rich, so...no problem, financially 😅

He'd find you elegant. "My queen," "My moon and stars," "My everything," "My spectacular wife,"

There could be a drinking issue 🤔

Every time he'd be out in the city, he'd pass by a bookstore and peek in to see if your favorite series has updated. He's a FANTASTIC storyteller and loves small, intimate parties. He would encourage you to lean on his shoulder while he told his friends all about his endeavors, making little jokes every now and then about miscellaneous things.

Jimin would make an amazing husband over all o/////o

[insolent-foolboy]

I first attempt at writing smol ZADR-

Thank you for the prompts everyone<3 Ngl, it’s been extremely hard for me to do this so far, like I seriously struggle with it and I think that’s all the more reason to try it but aaaaa I feel like this is so lame LOL So I’m sorry if you end up being disappointed to some degree cause I kinda am too, we’re in this together!!

I’ll keep trying though >////w////< I hope you guys do somewhat like this VERY VERY SMALL drabble, like it’s so tiny idek if it has a purpose but it’s a start I believe! coming from someone who has written a 40 paged ff in the past that was only 1/4th of the way done, this is a friggin miracle!

You and Zim had a new place to hang out, watching TV on his couch or lazying about in your own bedroom was getting stale. You both decided the massive tree on top of the massive hill and stargaze was an interesting, nightly pass-time.

You both have also been dating for a few months now and to your surprise, Zim genuinely enjoyed the experience so far. He loved being taken out and given things, and you didn't mind being the one to indulge him all the time. Zim didn't just like the attention, he liked that it was you giving him the attention and you liked being trusted by the one and only, adorable little alien on your planet.

But that was just one new addition to your already developing relationship as two individuals who never left each other's side. You two still had pity arguments and you two still stopped talking to each other when you pissed one another off far enough but you two always came back together.

Overall, things were sailing smoothly and as you cuddle on a summer night on a blanket under the stars, your fingers slid up and down Zim's arm aimlessly as he curled beside you. It was surreal but enthralling to be like this together.

You have long talked about all the constellations in the sky to the point where Zim didn't want to hear it anymore, so now the time was spent being silent and a little bit sleepy as the shared warmth was very relaxing.

Then Zim slowly rose up and leaned on one arm, leaning slightly over Dib. “Dib-thing, Zim wishes to do the making out.”

Dib blinked before smiling widely. “Oh do you?” he teased, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t like Zim’s straightforward approach to initiating affection, even if it’s not all that romantic.

“Yes, that is why I said it Stupid.” Zim said obviously, as he leaned on both his elbows over the human's chest, resting comfortably on it.

Dib huffed in amusement. “Alright then lay it on me Space Boy.”

“With pleasure~” the Irken purred before leaning up and over his human boyfriend, capturing his lips in a chaste kiss, Dib slowly slid his warm hands up Zim's sides and it wasn't long before their tongues meet heatedly under the night sky glittered with stars.

[legobiwan]

A week or two ago, this post was going around. The TCW plot generator CRACK ideas were WONDERFUL and RIDICULOUS and WEIRD and for some reason I felt compelled to challenge myself to write one. 

I am almost as sorry for subjecting you guys to this as I am for subjecting myself to writing it. But a challenge is a challenge, even if it is stupidly self-imposed. 

So without further adooodoo----

“Jar Jar Binks is a baker and Eeth Koth is a scientist. They are facing an intimate encounter with a tentacle-limbed life form on Chandrila. Optional plot: They are falling in or out of love.“

———————————————————————————————————

It was a pity, really.

Eeth Koth, stone-faced scientist of Iridonia, a planet known for raising disciplined minds capable of tolerating the greatest physical suffering…

…had been reduced to this.

Oh, sure it had begun as a mere dalliance. A hidden peck outside the ‘fresher. A taste in the alley outside his lab.

Perhaps even a stolen bite in a back closet after lunch.

It hadn’t been enough, though, the casual exchange flowering into something beyond the Iridonian’s steely control.

“But yousa liked my buns before!” came the plaintive cry of the culprit, his dealer in dopamine, his co-conspirator in comfort.

Once a week had soon become once a day, and then even more, two, even three times in an afternoon. It was an obsession, an addiction, and his scientist brain chastised him for the irrationality of it all, even as he dreamed of the next time, of the future, long and hazy in its optimism.

The ballads of Alderaan were now as clear as solutions, the poetry of the Snivvians replete with meaning.

Eeth Koth had fallen in love.

With Jar Jar Binks…

…’s baking.

The Gungan himself was beyond intolerable, tripping over his own feet (and accidentally letting loose a few extra pastries which Eeth carefully pocketed), wandering into what should have been high-security areas (where he was always happy to sell his wares), and announcing his presence in the research facility’s cantina with an unmistakable bleat (oh, but how would Eeth have known he even existed, if not for those commanding, albeit warbling tones?)

Still, it was time to put an end to this. Especially as the Gungan had started to interpret Eeth’s passion for his baking as…passion for something else.

Baked goods had started to appear outside of Eeth’s lab. A tray of cream horns. A pile of breadsticks. A quick perusal of Gungan culture on the holonet proved his worst suspicions.

Binks was pursuing Koth in the Gungan tradition.

Which apparently involved a lot of chasing. Something to do with their ancestors’ flight to the sea millions of years ago.

The  day a crate of dough balls - one million of them , to be precise - had appeared in his lab, Eeeth knew something had to be done.

And so he did what every proud member of the Iridonian race would do.

He requested a transfer to investigate the biological attack on Hanna City on Chandrilla.

For a few short weeks, everything was back to normal. Eeth took readings, scraped residue from the remains of buildings, and willed himself to forget the whole baked goods debacle on Coruscant. Near the end of his third week on assignment, he traveled to the shoreline, to the edge of the Silver Sea.

Which was not looking so silver anymore.

The normally iridescent body of water had turned pale and dull, undulating in wide, grotesque waves. Curiosity won out over self-preservation, and Eeth inched forward, poking a gloved finger into the mass.

He was not prepared for it to reach up with long, sinewy limbs and…

And…

His cheek was wet, a trail of slime running from his eye to the base of his neck.

The sea, whatever strange being it had transformed into - had caressed his cheek.

It was incredible.

And dangerous, he reminded himself sternly.

But like all scientists, Eeth housed the embers of childlike wonder at something new inside of him, and this was an extraordinary display of evolution. To encounter a creature that evidenced this level of sentience warranted much further investigation and he should get a team and -

“Aaaaa!”

A starchy limb encircled his leg, worming its way up his inner thigh and past his belt buckle and suddenly Eeth was not feeling so enthusiastic about scientific research, batting away the offending arm. But just as he did, another on his left tried again, and a third trying to…

“Damn this thing and its lascivious advances!” he yells, and that’s when he hears it. All the fight goes out of him and Eeth just groans and takes one hand to his forehead, only to wrench it back to his waist as the sentient pastry makes another pass at him.

“Yoo-hoo! Mista Koooth!” a voice sings, its source wading towards him through the sticky, glutinous mass.

“Jar Jar! What are you doing here! This a restricted area, there’s been a biological attack and - “

“Mista Koooooth! I knooooow!”

Eeth stilled.

“What? Jar Jar you didn’t - “

He wouldn’t.  Right? Eeth’s heart trilled. There was infatuation, and then there was biological warfare via baked goods for unrequited lust and not even the displaced Gungan would go so far -

“Mista Koth!” Jar Jar waved a finger as another tentacle rose from the mass of dough wrapped itself around Eeth’s waist.

“Jar Jar - get back you damned thing!” The tentacles were multiplying, encircling the scientist in a warm embrace. Eeth pulled and pushed, but there was no give and he was stuck with a salacious biscuit while Jar Jar stood beaming at him and so help him if he got free -

“JAR JAR WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?”

“A Giant Amorphous Bantha Breakfast Biscuit!”

“What?”

“Mista Koth, yousa don’t knows the Giant Amorphous Bantha Breakfast Biscuit? It was on the holo shows.”

Oh no. He did know what they were, they had showed up in several research journals. The amazing self-perpetuating breakfast food that devoured its chef. A feat of biology. And now it was here on Chandrila, and Eeth Koth, respected scientist, master of his craft - he was going to be eaten by a sentient, tentacled, horny kriffing pastry.

Something warm grabbed at his chest. Eeth yelped, heat racing to his cheeks.

“Jar Jar! Tell me you have the sauce.”

The only thing capable of halting the growth of the Giant Amorphous Bantha Breakfast Biscuit was blue sauce, which, was the only condiment served with the Giant Amorphous Bantha Breakfast Biscuit.

It was also probably the only mandatory condiment in the entire galaxy.

The Gungan fished through his pockets, loose change, a few spoons, and even a jar of insects falling into the swelling mass. Eeth shut his eyes, imagining what his colleagues might say at his funeral, or worse, what awful headlines the holonet reporters would come up with.

Dead by Dough.

Pulverized by a Pastry.

Lascivious Lattice Leaves Lab Scientist Leavened.

“Here we are!”

With a sweeping motion, the Gungan spilled the sauce on surface, blue creeping into the pores of the dough. The mass came to a halt, emitting a loud hiss as the entire thing deflated, sinking into the water without further incident.

Eeth stood and brushed himself off - powder and crumbs fell from the folds of his clothing and he can feel the granules of dough in his shoes, down his shirt, and his pants. It is like sand - rough, coarse and getting everywhere.

He coughed to cover his embarrassment.

“What yousa think of that, Mista Koth?”

Eeth fixed the Gungan with a glare.

“Jar Jar. No more pastries.”

“No?”

“No.”

“Not evens a bun?”

“Not even a bun.”

“But yousa liked my buns before!”

Eeth sighed and trudged towards the shore, leaving a bewildered Jar Jar in his wake.

——-

Back at the compound, Eeth locked the door to his quarters. The smell of dough and yeast had followed him for weeks, and not even the strongest cologne could rid the offending odor from his senses. After the incident, he quickly wrapped up his investigation on Chandrila, returning to Coruscant with a tersely-worded report and a number of strong words for his more inquisitive colleagues.

He glanced behind his shoulder, making certain that he was alone. Eeth entered a code on a nearby panel, and a door clicked open. He reached into the secret closet, napkin around his hand.

A satisfying crunch echoed in the chamber and the scientist moaned in pleasure.

One of the advantages of being a senior researcher was the ability to sneak field samples back from investigation sites.

Even if they were tentacled Gungan desserts.