#about logic. or i wouldn't still believe he was trying to communicate to me. while he also just stares at nothing. basically. or me

[schadenfreudich]

We finally gave the two... not quite people actual names, we could stop just describing them every time.

And while with Horst is was, yeah, that sounds like a fitting name, with Anton it was more of a "I think his name's Anton" which implies things that I will just not think about.

[itsclydebitches]

Right, so I was looking over your recap of Worthy again and didn't see you mention how absolutely contrived the circumstances of the James vs Winter fight were. If you remember from Creation, Winter explicitly states "No. When we're finished, we'll move both of you to safety." when Jacques asks if she'd be leaving him there. Logically, this would mean the next we see of Winter she'd be transporting James and Jacques to the nearest available portal but she doesn't? She just conveniently forgets about them. And I'd be FINE with that if it was written as a deliberate choice by Winter. "Sorry Weiss, these two men have negatively affected my life beyond repair and I can never forgive them." and while I don't necessarily agree wholeheartedly with that line of thinking because no matter what, every life should be fought for and saved in a scenario with magic transportation portals such as this. It'd at least be SOME sort of explanation that's in line with the narrative CRWBY is trying to tell. Instead we get her walking around aimlessly in the Atlas Vault, trying to communicate with everyone on the plan's status. Which makes no sense given that we've already seen the ground shake elsewhere meaning SOMETHING has happened to notify everyone that Atlas is falling. And I thought maybe I'll give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she doesn't know since no portals have spawned in the vault yet and then I rechecked and they HAVE.

She should be sprinting for the portal. Atlas is falling. She needs to go go go but instead she just calmly walks towards it? Is time not of the essence? Where's the urgency? Like I get that sprinting in heels up a flight of stairs that large would be absolute murder on her ankles but still. They dumb her down just for the sake of a stupid fight that nerfs her so she NEEDS Penny to die to give her the powers and win in a fight she should have no issues with.

If I'm also giving her the benefit of the doubt - and from what I can recall after an admittedly long hiatus from watching this particular episode - I think she intended to move Ironwood and Jacques after the evacuation is complete. "When we're finished." So yes, she knows Atlas is falling because that's a prerequisite of the portals appearing. She knows the evacuation is underway and that something is going on thanks to communications being down, but not what. Winter has her next step planned, but no indication of if she should start it yet because she's not able to contact anyone and presumably she wouldn't want to go through the portal until she's planning to leave Atlas permanently. (We know that they can use the portals to get around Atlas/Mantle thanks to Jaune portal hopping to look for survivors, but I'm not sure that's ever established among the other characters. AKA Winter might think she shouldn't go through one until she's ready to leave it all behind, but she can't do that until she's gotten Ironwood and her dad).

But all the above keeps it just as contrived and stupid? Why does Winter need to wait until "When we're finished" to move them? To my recollection the show never establishes anything like, "You're a security risk so we're going to ensure everyone else is through before dealing with you" or "Based on our battle we'll need the rest of the team present to move Ironwood" or even a variation of your idea: "In theory I believe that no one should be left to die, but considering you made our lives hell, Jacques, we're not going to worry about you until everyone else is safe. You get rescued if there's time left :)" It's just such a weird situation that, yes, exists to ensure that Ironwood is conveniently alone so that only his cell can conveniently open so that he can conveniently go find Winter who is all alone in the vault... because?

This could 100% be me forgetting some aspect of Volume 8, but why is she in there again? She's not guarding the Staff because the girls already have it. She's not guarding the portal because portals have opened up all over the city and Ironwood/the villains can slip through any of them to reach the same place (as Cinder did). She's not playing decoy - misleading others into thinking the Staff is still there - because she's totally blindsided by Ironwood's attack. I'm just trying to remember/figure out the justification for this because if there isn't any that makes the fact that Winter isn't rounding up the prisoners all the more absurd. Her role in this plan seems to be to twiddle her thumbs (in a random place she has no good reason to be in) until she's told that all the hard work is already done. Then she can do the one errand she could have been doing this whole time.

I will say, thinking about it now I'm not against Winter being at a disadvantage against Ironwood, regardless of whether or not she's nerfed in terms of the skill she displays. Her losing tracks for me in terms of her being the subordinate/having him as a mentor in the early Volumes (implying that he's stronger not just politically, but combat-wise too), age (again, the older character is likely to have more experience + time to train their skills), and the fact that just recently we saw Ironwood going toe-to-toe against her, Emerald, and all of team JNOR, holding his own until he was inevitably overwhelmed. Don't get me wrong, everything is still wrong with Penny dying to give Winter the Maiden powers, from how her death was orchestrated all the way to a semi-literal deus ex machina that lets Winter win via convenient magical powerup. We could have had the more interesting a) she wins through a really smart tactic or b) she looses and now Ironwood is thrown into the portal bridge fray instead of being left to presumably die off screen :/

[mrs-monaghan]

Hey, Shaz! Hope you're doing well. This is the first time I'm showing myself around here. Love your posts.

I was thinking. Not only is yelling "BH ARE FORCING THEM TO DO FAN SERVICE/PR!" dismissing KM's relationship and Tae's free will to choose his own girlfriend, but it's also so disrespectful towards BTS as a whole and the other members individually. It's perpetuating the idea that idols are nothing but their company's toys and they're forced to do things they don't want to do, something BTS have been trying since pre-debut to prove wrong in their case. It's something Namjoon struggled with a lot back in the day because people loved shitting on his work, dismissing his status as a rapper and calling him an industry puppet. It was and apparently still is a problem. Saying that KM and Tae are forced to do fan service/PR stuff these days is no different than calling them tools, pawns, toys, liars. According to this logic, the BTS members are pretty fake because BH can totally force them to do anything and they're quietly following orders. They have no will of their own, they're being handled, even though they're unfireable millionaires and literally the breadwinners. (Now imagine Yoongi forced to do something. That man would probably set the company's building on fire before he allowed others use him for their benefit. I'm joking. I'm joking. Or am I?)

When we got into this Bangtan stuff, most of us stayed because of how genuine these men were. They were keeping it real, they were relatable, they were "just like us". People always talk about this in the community like it's their life motto. "BTS are genuine" left and right. It's something ARMYs are very proud of. But when it comes to KM the genuineness goes out the window. JM and JK are not genuine. They're feeding us lies. They're this and that. People claim they love them (or at least one of them if they're a hardcore TKer, although a lot of these individuals hate JK as well and it shows), but they're so quick to doubt and portray both JM and JK as awful people. Because if TK is real (which is not), KM are terrible friends to Tae and if I were a TKer and I saw JK in JM's business 24/7 I'd wish TK broke up to be honest. If they have other secret relationships (which they don't), they're being horrible boyfriends to their partners when they suck and bite each other's ear and neck, flirt in broad daylight, hold hands, go out and have fun just the two of them all the time, talk until morning, come together, leave together, joined at the hip and are overall extremely Romantic Couple™.

KM apart, I'm writing this for very specific people, but y'all don't deserve any of these men. Clearly, you don't respect them or their decisions. You don't trust them and you don't believe in their autonomy. You think they're just BH's marionettes. At this point I really don't understand why some of you are stanning them. You obviously don't like BTS.

Idek what chapter 2 has become. People like me who became Armys last year it was literally such bad timing to join the fandom. I wouldn't be shocked if some people just turned around and left. Ever since solo projects were announced its been a fucking mess. And from what I gather while the vermin were many they never used to be as vile as they are now. Chapter 2 just seems to have made them worse.

When BTS were still doing ot7 stuff it was easy to think we were all ot7. (Well, apart from solos who make that pretty obvious) But these big, big accounts got away with pretending to be ot7 back then. But now with members doing shit one at a time people are showing their true colors and it has not been pretty.

I envy people who support BTS on the surface. People who are only subscribed to BTS official accounts and only listen to their music and watch their reality shows then go about their day. Those people know peace. 😂 Ignorance is bliss y'all.

Stay strong Jikookers. Stay strong. It's gonna be alright. I promise 😘

[kiawren]

💛💚💜 hi wren :3

💛/Yellow: Imagine a fantasy au with you and your f/o! What roles would the two of you take? How would the story end?

Well there's this au inspired by cupid and psyche I dumped in the tags of this post about wren being some cupid figure + fallen angel of sorts and kiawe's form is part fire and they fall in love even though circumstances rlly don't favour them to be together or something

A few times I've thought of a prince x knight au where wren is the prince and Kiawe is the knight becuz the latter is very hardworking Buuut I do not want to be royalty nor deserve to be or see myself in that role in an AU and I would rather dedicate myself to Kiawe as a knight does Buuuttt I also don't see myself as a knight becuz im lazy as hell and have no athletic stamina So.

Also an au where Kiawe is a vampire hehegheurgrjtjgkhh and wren woukd be like Haha you want to suck my blood So bad and kiawe's like no Actually i don't need to we have ethical reliable means of getting blood routinely.. But if he doesn't then well I am right Here

💚/Green: Does your f/o get jealous? How do they cope with it?

I think emotion wise he can be the type to feel jealousy but logic wise he's trusting of his partner and we communicate so he wouldn't find much reason to... Um to answer the question i think when kiawren is still pining then yeah, I think wren hangs out with Ilima becuz he helps wren with academia and research and the places to do fieldwork in alola cuz I think he's done research to write his own papers as well idk I forgor what's Ilima's academic qualifications that's what I have for now, then yeah kiawe gets jealous but when they're already dating then not really.. How he copes with it... Just seethes in secret or asks wren why he needs to spend time with Ilima so much (but trying to be subtle about it he will not say he's jealous or anything at all) but he will understand cuz wren has said it themself that he prefers spending time with Kiawe the most and everyday will still find time to do so, so honestly kiawe doesn't need to worry about wren avoiding him or spending less time with him or anything, if anything he shoukd be asking why the hell wren wants to meet him every single day

💜/Purple: What would your f/o do if you got into a argument? Would they eventually apologize?

Well they don't rlly get into arguments cuz they can communicate and wren is chill and would avoid conflicts. Though, they really do have parts of their characters that really do conflict. Like wren being too passive and slothful regarding their commitments while kiawe is actively working hard every day, maybe one day he might really try to sternly tell wren to get their stuff together if they really want to reach their ambitions instead of dreaming all day, but then again whatever kiawe says abour wren's flaws will be valid as hell becuz his criticisms are not petty but actually genuine so honestly wren woukd be like damn yah ok you make sense and they won't argue or anything.

Alsoooo... Okay yeah this one could be realistic too — kiawe gets reallty worried about not getting into his dream school to study dance abroad, and wren assures him by saying don't worry you've did what you can and just don't think about it if it's out of your control basically stuff that kinda brushes off the problem and encourages him to relax instead (becuz wren isn't confrontational about their own problems, this is true for me irl), and kiawe gets annoyed and says you always say that and you never do anything tangible to try and succeed and I'm actually worried and kinda scared about my future and want to take real steps to make me more assured but you're just saying words to make me feel better. Okay becuz this is what I always say to my sister and she's just kinda tired of me saying "it's past 9pm don't think about it" cuz that mindset doesn't work for everyone and for Kiawe I think he believes in the work he puts in helping him reach the outcome instead of just luck or pure optimism, so yeah wren probbaly says okay what do you want me to do, youve literally put in all the work you can and I see it and I think it's more than good enough and reallt reflects your genuine passion so what can I do if you dotn get accepted or if it's deemed not enough.

Um yeah for apologies.... Kiawe apologises first, I don't really apologise instead I just wsnt to move past the argument and pretend everything is fine and interact normally after... I just find it awkward to communicate it out even though inside I'm genuinely sorry and can objectively think it through in my head to see I'm wrong, but still Kiawe will apologise first becuz he cares about all his loved ones and won't let one-upping each other in arguments be worth the time we spend brooding in silence. And once Kiawe apologises wren will apologise too and everything will be okay and they try to talk things out 😁

[kitkatopinions]

You realize that you're both ignoring Ironwood's glaring flaws and vilifying the protagonists for not obeying him, while vilifying the protagonists for working with him despite his flaws?

I'm not doing either of those things, you just don't listen. But thank you for at least attempting to refute what I said instead of just churning out the same thing. Let me explain to you how you're wrong.

I'm not vilifying the protagonists for working with Ironwood, because I don't believe they were wrong for working with Ironwood, because I think that he wasn't a clearly bad dictator until he shot Oscar (which started him being shot through a villain arc at the speed of light.) I believe that Ironwood was a flawed good guy who was doing some morally dicey things while stuck between a rock and a hard place, and Team RWBY and co were flawed good guys too who rightfully believed in some of the things Ironwood was doing (like trying to launch the communications tower.) I'm simply pointing out that the belief of many anti-rwdes that Ironwood was clearly a bad dictator throughout his appearances but especially in volume seven - if true - wouldn't make Team RWBY and co look good and would actually reflect very badly on them. I don't believe it to be the case that Team RWBY and co were actively working with a dictator for months. Therefore I'm not vilifying them for willingly working with a dictator for months because I don't believe that they were doing that. But the anti-rwde posters who are of the opinion that Ironwood was always a dictator and that it should've been obvious and anyone who doesn't believe that to be the case is either stupid or a bigot do believe that Team RWBY and co willingly worked with a dictator for months. They're the ones accidentally vilifying the mains, you're just getting angry at me for pointing it out. By their logic (and assumingly yours) Team RWBY and co (and the writers) all belong in the same category as me.

I also don't think that I've really vilified Team RWBY and co for going against Ironwood. either. I've been very clear about the fact that I think that the essentially trolley problem at the end of volume seven was one that had absolutely no 'right answer' or perfect solution, and Team RWBY's stance of 'we should risk it all in the hopes of saving everyone and leaving no one behind' - while a little idealistic - could've been written in a good and very hopeful way. I'm not sure it was a good choice of the writers and I think it could've been done a lot better, but I don't think Team RWBY were wrong to take the stance they did as characters. I feel like I've been clear about that. I don't start getting frustrated with Team RWBY and co until Volume Eight, and I don't think anyone comes out of that volume looking good, and I know I've been very clear about the fact that I think the writers are to blame and still love the characters of Ruby and Yang and stuff even if some of the things they do frustrate me at times.

I also don't think Ironwood is perfect. I've said that over and over. I'd love to know what 'glaring flaws' you think I'm ignoring, lol. Because all I've said recently as far as I know is that I don't think he was a dictator doing things like invading Vale and ruling Mantle as a dictator. If you believe he was, cool. But again, the main protagonists all worked with him and for him willingly for months. I don't think they were wrong to do that, buuuuut..... It kind of feels like you might. XD

[tothedarkdarkseas]

Okay, now I'm genuinely curious to hear what ideas you'd have if you were in charge of making Stu TikToks. I'm prepared to be amused and also horrified in the best way possible.

I'm sorry for the delay! (It's been a hell of a weekend.) When I first wrote something about the character profiles they made for Tiktok during P6, I'd never used the app. Nowadays, every social media app has their own version of shorts/reels/et cetera, and my only exposure to Tiktok now is through reposted content on YouTube or Instagram. I've come away with two impressions: there are major trends that dominate the average experience but also thriving niche communities for anything, and I'll be hearing "A little context if you care to listen, I find myself in a shit position" on my deathbed.

That all being said, here's what Stu's Tiktok page would look like if it were up to me!

He's active, but not constantly so. Not enough to give the impression he's got a routine, not a one video per day sort of user. Still, he posts too much to be passive. Always featuring himself.

Football videos. I'm sorry, I'm playing the hits (assuming the audience is... mostly me, haha) but football videos. The phone's sticking up out of a cup on a metal table in the garden. The videos are all raw footage, no snappy edits or even music overlaid-- rather, he's got one Bose earbud in and the other down in the cup to amplify sound, the music now recorded secondhand just utterly garbled. He's occasionally got his Chelsea kit on, but not always. The videos are not concise. Three to seven minutes on average of him running around, no one playing opposite him, just showing off his footwork and kicking the ball into the unguarded net. The videos all begin and end with him way too close to the camera as he starts and stops recording.

I'm imagining a thirst trap that Murdoc's recorded of him returning to his bedroom after a shower, hair and chest wet with his towel on his shoulder. He asks "Are you filming?" and then proceeds to tepidly hem and haw, doing nothing to stop him. He captions the video cant believ he film this. geri attic geezer.. goin tp get him back. (He's clearly unbothered because he knows he's fit.)

Too-dark videos of himself in bed shot with the forward facing camera, usually high, looking like he's just woken from a 7-hour nap. These are usually cloudy-headed musings about nature, music, death, life. Occasionally he says something crass or unintentionally funny, but for the most part they're just on the other side of incomprehensible. There's an internal logic to his musings, you assume, but he'll eventually stray too far for someone outside his head to follow.

I wouldn't be mad if these sorts of videos were occasionally quite astute, quite depressing, wise in a sort of sour way. But if I were "directing" things, I think it'd be best to space those between videos he reckons are touching a raw, truthful nerve, but are mostly sort of aimless and shot up his nose.

He'll play piano, or melodica, or marimba, or experiment with singing bowls or finger cymbals. He'll occasionally sing Gorillaz songs acoustic, or cover The Human League, or try out new material. In the latter case, he is notably high or notably low, so to speak. He never comes across entirely clear or professional.

He probably records in studio at times, trying much too hard to look important while remaining casual. He'll record something quick at an award show, showing nothing impressive to the camera and instead filming from his crotch in the car or a dressing room. Stu really ricochets between glamorizing and deglamorizing celebrity, I think, and you're often left feeling uncertain whether that was or wasn't intentional.

I don't know if you're able to see other users' liked videos/if their "FYP" is visible at all, but Stu's is all fanmade Chelsea reels, official Chelsea reels from players or WAGs, borderline pornography, "long-distance reiki healing" sessions/generally grifty new age spiritualist videos, extremely technical mechanical repairs primarily on synthesizers or soundboards done in silence, world music played straight to camera with little fanfare, very local British food chain content, SpraypaintTok, fashion and sneakerhead videos that he's not sure he actually gets but he understands have a certain value to his image, and the occasional animal doing something funny. The algorithm strongly favors the Chelsea, the partial nudity, and the fiddly repairs.

Sadly I don't think I've delivered on much horrifying content here! Suspending disbelief that there is no social media manager patrolling what he can and cannot post: he is, of course, not above filming a touch of borderline pornography himself. Never with Murdoc, even if their fingerprints both linger in other ways, but certainly with women in short dresses, heads tucked to his neck to obscure their face, his hand firm enough on their thigh to leave white lines in their wake. There's nothing that would get him flagged-- they're clothed, if unbuttoned, but there's a sort of editorial sleaze to it. His own head rocks to the side, self-impressed. Sometimes he buries in touring or award show content and captions it berlin. thanx for the memmory. o might be munich.

That's all I have for now, sorry if it's less scummy than you'd hoped! My brain's a bit fried lately. I'm open to your suggestions as well!

[toxicfoundations]

Some Things That Keep Me Up At Night

When I start to lay down at night I start to remember every serious wrong that's happened to me; mostly related to being the selected scapegoat at home and at school in my youth.

Because I never pressed back against attacks and scapegoating beyond a point of tears (I stopped perusing justice after emotional battery and threats) I became an obvious target for bullying by peers and authority figures.

I believe I've already communicated the times my foster (adoptive) parents beat me; from my father choking me under the table the first day I met him because I spit up food I was allergic to (I was 3), to the night my mother grabbed me by my hair while I was sleeping and dragged me down a flight of stairs, punching me in my head to the laundry room, claiming I left a sock in the dryer.

These incidents I could forgive and forget; it's the public record of being expelled under false pretenses, or being labeled a 90 lb "bully" for verbally sticking up to abusers (with retorts) or trying to protect an autistic kid on our bus (the bus driver allowed the other kids to bully him; I tried to take him to the side and explain that he was being bullied and he freaked out).

The there's the mental healthcare and healthcare workers that act aggressive because of mislabeling on my file; there are things easily disprovable on the files but the staff always act suspicious, rude, huffy a very aggressive when I speak about addressing my medical files. Something as simple as questioning a supposed diagnosis from 20 years ago communicated through "the patient" could be disproven by asking who the physician was or what was the clinics name. When I press for corrections, they dodge or attack my character, and when I keep trying and they keep mistreating me, I keep pressing in hopes they'll get tired and let me speak my peace.

I don't have any voice in any of these matters.

Earlier in life it was obvious that I was targeted for being a foster kid in a rich area that was skinny, "nerdy", non-conforming and non-authoritarian; later it was because people wish to engage in various forms of circular logic to explain how I got where I am today.

There are dozens of examples, and I've posted emails and paperwork here in the past displaying the type of people I was dealing with; from family members calling me a "faggot" and threatening me with violence to get they wanted, to government officials trying to lock me up under false pretenses like saying I typed "people bully me" on social media and there I "deserved" to be locked up.

Despite being a human-rights advocate, teetotaler with no criminal history, I'm still treated like I deserve abuse. Online, when I try to introduce reason to groups, I get death threats and mockery. I'm punished for recording those sessions, and the rest of world goes on, spinning.

The sad part is that I've been in therapy for decades and none of my therapists notes even touch on any of these subjects, because they focus on stereotyping to shift blame or work (slavery) as if it would change anything at all. Hundreds of government and healthcare workers, and not one knows anything about me or my situation, and they don't care to.

I started this blog because it helped putting things out there; so I could communicate the sorts of things that had and are happening to me, and so that people wouldn't feel alone about the cruelty and various oppression they've been through.

Apparently Tumblr removes "inactive" blogs, so this will eventually be lost to time, much earlier than other parts of the web.

[herglowinggirl]

Hello, familiar anon here, I didn't ask the question about an SOK ending where Yun lives and gains redemption. I also wouldn't mind having my own tag. I haven't found any other evidence of Yun shipping Kyoshi and Rangi outside of "The Boy From Makapu". How does Kyoshi view Yun later in her life( up to the first year after "The Meeting", creating Kyoshi Island nearly 25 years later, the last years of her life)? Would Kyoshi ever mention or talk about Yun after the events of The Shadow of Kyoshi?

hello! and yes I have some thoughts on this and how it would impact the advice Kyoshi gave to Roku and Aang. this got long but I’d love to break down parts of it to write fic, which I think I will do and perhaps post before Kyoshi Fortnight. But I digress, it’s long enough that I have decided to use subtitles. If anything skip to the end about the advice she gave Roku and Aang I think it’s most relevant to what I want to say and also my favorite part.

what I talk about under the cut: the ways I believe yun’s death would impact kyoshi’s actions after tsok and what the advice she gave aang and roku actually means (my thoughts on “only justice will bring peace” means)

would kyoshi talk about yun during her lifetime?

Yes. First off, it would be impossible to avoid him in the political landscape, because it is mentioned that he passed lots of judgements and signed treaties, ect. Although Kyoshi has grown in her leadership style and it’s turned a little (a lot) anti-establishment, she would still need to deal with the fallout of Yun not being the Avatar, because there would be a need to re-sign treaties and settle disputes with people seeking to take advantage of others now that the Avatar has “changed” would have to be dealt with and in tandem, Yun’s legacy.

But also, in a duology that features grief, I find it a natural continuation of the narrative that Yun would be mourned. You don’t stop knowing or loving someone after they pass, and I feel like mourning all of Yun—the boy he was, where he came from, his legacy, the decisions he made, the impact he had on the people around him, even how he hurt people—is only natural and is slightly unavoidable. I think Kyoshi mourns all of her deceased loved ones. 

Just, like the concept of this: she’s always hated pai sho but now when she faces a board in her gut and in her throat things feel wrong because it reminds her of what Yun had to do to survive. A breeze smells like the flour and air Kelsang sent into her face the moments before everything changed. She collects pebbles that Lek would’ve liked. Rangi brings her fire lilies for an anniversary and she starts crying. She sings songs with Wong that were her parent’s favorites that coincidentally, Kelsang knew too.

community in grief and kyoshi’s relationships

He was Rangi’s friend, too. Auntie Mui and Hei-Ran are sure to mourn him in their own ways. In tSoK Kyoshi calls her team Avatar a group of contradictions and misfits and in his way, Yun was too. The false Avatar. What a title! 

A continuation of the concept: Rangi and Kyoshi remind each other of him every day for a while, swapping stories about him when it gets to be too much, making eye contact when they can hear his voice making light of something stupid an official has said. Hei-Ran makes her do drills she made Yun do. Auntie Mui makes his favorite dish on his birthday that they do not pass in silence, because then what would they be, that group of misfits, to forget another outcast? If they don’t mourn the boy from Yokoya who will mourn them, or who would’ve mourned them if they hadn’t been so lucky? Who will care for the beggars and orphans of the world if not the Avatar who was once one of them and her companions? In a way, the retribution and pain of it all is justice for the life that Kyoshi took. Like, there’s just so much to unpack in the way she says “Was I right about anything at all? What will they say about me? Avatar Kyoshi, who killed her friend because she couldn’t save him?” But I don’t think her guilt would silence her. 

That being said, Yun was fundamentally a victim of a system that failed him. The same one that failed Kyoshi. In another way, her actions are justice on a world that failed her and her best friend and the similarities they shared, and she’s able to take those actions because of the way that Yun impacted her, for better or for worse. So yes, I think during her lifetime, she would speak of Yun and who he was, not letting people forget the ways they (and she) failed him and how easily everyone wants to forget their failure. It brings me to the way she was so angry with the Earth Kingdom establishment for discarding him and trying to hide history away. I don’t think she’d ever do that, even if she did...uh, dispatch him.

kyoshi, immortality, and her role as an avatar

I’d like to turn to two passages:

Kyoshi: “The way you describe it, you’d have to decide what version of yourself you’d be stuck as, forever.”

Lao Ge: “Exactly! Those who grow, live and die. The stagnant pool is immortal, while the clear flowing river dies an uncountable number of deaths.”

and

In the future, perhaps, she’d become finalized like carved stone. It would be easier to deal with the world then. She could only hope.

[...]

She still had to be careful not to lose her balance and fall. Kyoshi kept her eyes focused on her difficult path, sometimes stumbling but making sure to catch herself, taking one step at a time.

This isn’t directly related to what I think she would say, but more about how she lets her experiences, and therefore, her experiences and relationship with Yun, affect who she is. Here, F.C. Yee is detailing the person we see in her cameo in A:tLA. It’s a testament to her growth, yes, but also to how she lived so long. She’s allowed to grow now, while she’s young and still learning. But eventually Kyoshi’s growth will wane, leaving us with the iron woman we saw in A:tLA. 

Remember when I said I would call F.C. Yee a sap for the very last Kyoshi POV line? It’s the last sentence in my second excerpt, is that Kyoshi is allowing herself make mistakes. It’s pretty obviously a little deeper than the concept of walking down a slope: She became one of the most revered Avatars, we know how her story ends, if not lots of the in-betweens, but F.C. Yee tells us right here in that sentence. She changed and she learned. 

I think, however, that eventually she had to pick a place to stop in order to stop aging. If I had to pick a point where she became “immortal” I’d pick Rangi’s peaceful and timely death surrounded by her loved ones on Yokoya (not Kyoshi Island since I’m going to maintain that her A;tLA cameo was “immortal” Kyoshi) and I think Lao Ge killed her—or at least convinced her to let go.

further thoughts on her longevity: rangi’s role and future

Ok before anybody comes into my inbox like “um zey herglowinggirl I need you to know that actually Rangi also lived to 230 😌″ because I understand the sentiment it’s more like here’s what I’d like to discuss: Kyoshi can’t be immortal around Rangi because Rangi is in so many ways her catalyst for growth. First off, it would be completely out of character for Rangi to be immortal, because she’s constantly moving and being and feeling and judging and that changes her. Positive jing. And Lao Ge says it: “those who grow, live and die.” Rangi believes in the best and strives for the best, for perfection. For Kyoshi to freeze herself and become immortal, that would require picking an imperfect state. And as we know, Sei’naka women do not accept imperfection 😤. 

Although Rangi promises to always be by Kyoshi’s side, I think in the latter years of Kyoshi’s live it’s more like the impact that Rangi has had on her in that frozen state. That voice of Rangi’s is part of Kyoshi in those years. However, without Rangi, it is unlikely that Kyoshi will always or commonly choose to act on it. It’s stated multiple times throughout the novels that Rangi is Kyoshi’s center and that she doesn’t know who she’d be without Rangi, but I think the logical conclusion is immortal. With Rangi’s death she becomes her own center by stopping her growth; with Rangi’s death she just becomes...that stone she was talking about, where it does get easier to make decisions because you’re not striving to constantly change and grow. It’s almost a coping mechanism, if you will. Because Kyoshi is more than Rangi, can function without Rangi, it’s just not necessarily pretty.

lao ge’s role and future

Which brings me to my “in my personal version of canon Lao Ge kinda maybe killed Kyoshi” point. Rangi is in no way Kyoshi’s morality, but she is very much the idealistic ‘better’ half. With this catalyst of hope and change gone, I think back to the creation of the Dai Li—it very much sounds to me like something Jianzhu would do. Kyoshi, who had previously been the breakdown of negotiations, created a secret op police force? 

I think the moment Kyoshi started being the establishment, the moment she was the band-aid instead of the solution (much like Yun was, hint hint) Lao Ge would’ve paid her a visit. Either this or the creation of the Dai Li created a catalyst for perhaps an existential crisis, perhaps just being tired, perhaps simply knowing what is best...Kyoshi is, and always will be, a sworn criminal who cannot uphold the law, only her own judgements. She is both the law and the breaking and bending of it, and when she loses this balance when Rangi falls from her side and she becomes her own rock I think it would swing her away from her center, and this is where she becomes immortal. Eventually, it would become enough of an issue for people to intervene and tell her that her time as an Avatar is coming to an end. 

advice to future avatars

This is my favorite point and I’ll tie it back to Yun in just a second. I have posted about thinking about the impact of Yun’s death on Kyoshi and how that would’ve impacted her legacy and the advice she gave Roku and Aang before. Honestly what strikes me is how proud Kyoshi would be of Aang. The way that each Avatar must learn to forge their own way and become their own person and what their era needs, balancing themselves, is something so lovely. I think Kyoshi would’ve absolutely loved how Aang took the advice of his predecessors and said “no, I know what would be better for me,” and I think post-tSoK Kyoshi, who has learned she has to forge her own way and style as a leader, would love and be so proud of him for that. 

However, that doesn’t mean that her advice doesn’t have weight. I think mainly her “immortal” phase would perhaps have an impact on the way Yun impacts her advice. I think “only justice will bring peace” also speaks to the finality of death. Just like immortality, death keeps growth from happening. “only justice will bring peace” is also a nod to the way you must learn to cope with your actions and the way you feel about them. It’s also about Aang’s inner peace, which is something I don’t think I’ve ever seen mentioned. Everyone always wants to talk about what he should’ve done and how Kyoshi was right because she told Aang about her choice to let Chin die, but I think she actually guided him to the idea that you should be ok with yourself. To be confident in what you do and take up responsibility for your actions. Kyoshi wasn’t telling him murder was good. She was telling him she owned up to her actions and chose to make those decisions as an Avatar. To me, this finality speaks of growth after Yun’s death and the end of tSoK. She has grown and then frozen, but that means she has changed.

And although I don’t have an answer for what advice she might’ve given Roku, I think it’s a good way to interpret this. The only thing keeping Kyoshi from being honest about Yun’s death is the fact that Zoryu has “Yun” locked up. I think this is likely one of her biggest regrets, that she cannot be honest and responsible for something that weighs so heavily on her soul. This, I think, guides her advice. Only justice will bring peace. Now that I’ve thought it out, perhaps it wasn’t Lao Ge, and perhaps it was the idea that Yun had never been done justice and perhaps that turmoil never changed, which made her long-lived but not quite immortal. She cannot quite know the peace of death nor of life.

I think she must’ve told Roku that no matter what, he must accept the consequences of what he does. He’s not willing to loose that friendship and I think Kyoshi would’ve understood that, and the questions Roku would’ve had to pose himself as an Avatar. That is Kyoshi’s advice. Only justice, true justice in the form of accountability and self-actualization as a leader, will allow you to make good decisions. The acceptance of this: that whatever he does, he must be willing to accept it’s legacy, learn from it, and teach the next Avatar just as she let Yun’s death affect her leadership and what she taught. And I think that’s probably incredibly poetic, even if I’m getting a bit ahead of myself. 

[golbrocklovely]

As someone who’s boyfriend has some form of ability where he can see actual figures and feel energies, i genuinely don’t think Kat has a gift but more so is reacting due to fear. Before they even arrived to the place she wanted to throw up and appeared on edge, that to me is the biggest factor. Another common trait that occurs due to fear is chills or numbness. They were in Canada in the middle of a snow storm and she tried to claim her hands being cold was due to a entity holding her hand AFTER someone said that might be it.

You can not just shut off emotions on and off, and i believe the more she thought about it and heard a radiator going off, the more she freaked herself out. If you really want to test your abilities, go at places like a skeptic and just allow things to happen. If you go in already expecting a place to have activity then you are going to feel activity no matter what because your brain will play tricks on you. I feel this is the reason we saw little to no reaction from Sam because he has said in prior videos she has a tendency to overreact and thinks everything is paranormal now. Even little thumps in his house scare her now.

My boyfriend has had instances where we will walk into some random old or empty place and he will zone out and back away. Or he’ll just stare and then after a long while will have a reaction. This is something he’s had since he was a kid and his sister has the same gift and reactions. You have to think logically and not just assume. Colby… thats different he doesn’t react right away or freak out, his reactions are almost random, whatever he feels in the Estes method i wouldn’t call it paranormal communication but more so sensitivity to sound or chronic anxiety.

i wouldn't be so quick to say neither one of them are intuitive to spirits. there is more than one way to communicate with spirits. while your bf might be clairvoyant, kat and colby could be a different clair, like clairsentient or claircognizant or maybe even clairaudient.

i personally believe that everyone has the ability to talk to spirits, it's just whether or not you want to talk to them. if you have no need or want to, it's not gonna happen. which i kinda believe is why sam doesn't get as much "interaction" as the rest do. while he definitely wants evidence, i don't think he fully believes in all the paranormal stuff he has experienced himself. and especially if you're one of his friends, he's more likely to not believe you at all unless he saw it/experienced it too.

that being said, kat and colby definitely get scared, and that can cause them to feel freaked out by any tiny little bump or immediately feel sick just bc they were anxious, but i think we have to look at the bigger picture.

there have been other investigations in the past where kat wasn't freaking out as much as she was in the last one, and she still felt something. something that the rest of them didn't. and the thing is, spirits (at least what i believe) communicate in a multitude of different ways. one of those ways is to make a person sick. that's why in paranormal places, ppl tend to get headaches, back pain, nausea when ghost are trying to communicate with them. they usually aim for your weaker spots on your body. yes, part of that could be fear making you feel ill, but i think it is also the spirit trying to communicate.

but i do think in this past video she was getting freaked out just bc of everything going on, both paranormal and not.

and then with colby... he's definitely an enigma. i think he's definitely intune to picking up other's feelings, both in a paranormal sense and irl. and he also gets that sick feeling kat gets. i do think his experiences with anxiety can make him feel nauseous (he's talked about how his anxiety in the past made him feel like throwing up), but again, i think it's also a paranormal thing bc that spot would be weaker aka easier for spirits to communicate with him thru.

obviously, i don't know any of this for certain. but just basing it off of what i can tell and the basic info i do know about communicating with the paranormal and the group itself, i could see colby and kat being intuitive to spirits more so than sam. i mean, even stas has had some experiences, so she's definitely intuitive in some regard. and i think with what might happen in this series, sam's intuition might open up finally.

[dannyboyzone]

Why these Lookism Bad Guys are liked, a rant by me

Alright, so I have came across a post talking about how Johan is hated on despite being a "bad person", and trashing other characters for absolutely no reason other than guilt tripping people. I personally think the post is immature, but due to my own personality and mental state, it has still got me kind of pressed, because it all sounds ridiculous. This post will be about some people in Lookism that are viewed as a bad people and or are hated on, and why I think they are liked. I won't speak for everybody liking these characters, and it will include some characters that I hate. This post is just to give a general idea for people who are really ignorant about why some characters might receive love. You might have come across that post, and if not, I am talking about this one below. - Well, only a small part of it, that threw me off. -

I didn't include the person's username out of respect and also so they don't feel attacked or anything of the sort.

Before starting this off, there are a few things I would like to say. If I sound petty, I truly don't care. I never saw anybody hating on Johan, at max maybe give criticism, I also don't hate Johan or try to disvalidate anyone's feelings, just get some things straight. Liking someone's looks does not immediately mean you are attracted to them, neither does liking the person's look you are attracted to mean you are toxic. It means you are loving. If you like someone's personality, you will find them beautiful consciously or subconsciously. If someone finds a character handsome, it is not a crime, people have types and preferences, and if they do it's none of your business. Hating good looking people doesn't make you woke, neither hating on people who are attracted to good looking people. What are you, Crystal Choi? And yes, people will be attracted to looks, it's a normal human act. People will notice if they find someone more attractive or unattractive which is not a bad thing. What is a bad thing when they start treating people different because of it. I assure you, most of the lookism fandom that I have came across doesn't do that.

This post will not include Seong Yohan because I never saw him get hated and I don't think nobody knows where he is coming from.

Samuel Seo

Yeah, so what seemed to be a surprise for me is that not a lot of people like Samuel, or at least understand why the people liking him would. Now, I personally feel no romantic attachment towards him. - Which is yes, normal, even if he is fictional. It's called fictophilia and I better see no judgement about it. - However, I do love Samuel a lot, and would love to care for him and grow a strong bond. To me, Samuel is not a monster. At all, believe me, Samuel isn't liked only for his looks. For me, personally, I love him so much because I can relate to him. I absolutely hated him at first, but grew to love him because he is human. He is complex, has a hard life and isn't perfect. That's exactly why I love him, and someone else I really adore does too. Yes sure, as you grow to like someone's personality, you find them handsome and or pretty. It's so much easier to say someone is pretty than to say, 'Hey, I love this person because they helped me go through so much.' Not everyone has the same love language, not everyone is comfortable with blunt affection. Besides, Samuel can and will achieve anything he wants. He has SO much sides to himself, not just 'good looking violent guy with big tits'. That's not Samuel at all. Besides, if PTJ oversexualises him, it's hard to not notice his body.

Yes sure, Samuel hits women, but I personally, don't f%cking care. Your vagina doesn't define if you deserve violence or not, your behaviour and the person's you face personality does. I am personally someone that doesn't mind violence as long as the person deserved it, because some scumbags in this world do. If they happen to be a woman, that's not on me, they shouldn't have done whatever they did. If you are not a violent person, I am not even sorry to tell you this, but you are probably sexist. It's not like all women are fragile and unable to get hit. Besides, if his violence is the problem, why is it fine that he hits men? Because men can handle it? According to statistics women have a higher pain tolerance. By your logic, you should call him out for hitting anyone in his way. Stop acting like hitting women is a necessarily bad thing, start saying that hitting innocent people is a bad thing.

If you must hate on him, maybe use the fact that he killed his abusive and neglective parents. Don't give a hard time to others for liking him though.

Ahn JongGun

Does Gun seem like a bad guy? Absolutely, he has done some horrible things. Then why do we like him? Because he seems to have a smaller character development coming, he has so many things to him and he is an absolutely incredible and complex character. I am very curious of his background and what caused him to be so violent and yet so calm. I like him because he allows himself to be human. From his religion, to his knowledge of material arts, to his adoration towards Vasco's material arts teacher - I forgot his name, so excuse me for that -, to his attention to details, to his fashion sense, it all makes him human. It's nice to see someone be a human, instead of just 'hot guy' or 'villain'. He is a nice character that brings many depth to the story. I could list a hundred of reasons why I love him, and no, none of it is his "weird" fashion sense. I do find him incredibly stylish, I just think some people in this fandom don't understand fashion. - Oops, I guess. - My main reason to liking him is that he is most likely either bisexual or pansexual. That he has a crush on Daniel. I might seem like I have a weird fetish or something, or that I am a crazy "fangirl". That's not the case though. I am a part of the LGBTQ+ community, and while not huge, I adore the hell out of the representation. It's nice to see such a smart, elegant and powerful guy be the representation. Because he is a character that's not there simply to be gay and full of stereotypes. Like, no hard feelings if you fit into stereotypes, but as a person who doesn't fit into them, it's a refreshing thing to see someone that's allowed to have many sides to himself other than just 'the gay friend'. Of course I am sure there are a lot of people who have many other reasons to love him, like his endless knowledge of material arts. There is so many reasons to be interested in his character, and just because you can't see it that doesn't mean others are blind to it too.

Yeah, he might have slept with countless women, but the main reason you can't count it is because he never stated the amount of women he slept with, neither did anyone else. Sure, he did say that Daniel is better than any women he ever slept with, but for all you know that could have been 3. Even if, it doesn't matter. He could have slept with 3, or 70 women. It doesn't matter, because not everyone's sexual life will reflect your own. And other people's sexual life is none of your business. Sure, you can say it's only fiction, and that I am overreacting, but when it comes to such small or personal details, people tend to put their own personal view into it. It's really not fine to shame others for their sexual life. As long as he uses protection, and didn't make anyone pregnant and doesn't play with the feelings of anyone, who gives a f%ck.

Some people tend to lash out sexually if they experience trauma or stress, and no, I don't mean they go and r%pe people, I mean that they go and have sex with different people who give consent. Even if he doesn't do it because of that, why does it bother you so much? Sex isn't a disgusting act. Some people like it, some people don't. Whatever their decision is, as long as no one is hurt, you should respect their decision.

Kim JoonGoo

Alright, this got me f%cked up. Goo is such a good character, and no way he would ever cheat on his S/O. He has morals and a lot of good sense in himself. Sure, he might have said that Samuel will be his secret friend, which led OP to believing Goo would cheat, but that's... a terrible reason, in my opinion. Gun knows that Samuel works for Goo, and Goo owns up it too. Besides that, nothing, absolutely nothing would lead to the fact that Goo would cheat. Because he wouldn't.

Now, why do I like Goo, and why some other's might like him too. He is such a well put together character, unpredictable yet so simple. He damages people to a point they have to retire, doesn't get scared of murderer, is a money maniac and hates his boss. You would think, he is dirty and fits the "gangster" stereotypes. That's not the case at all. He is more hygienic than most of the characters of lookism, if not the most hygienic one. He hates drinking and smoking, doesn't have tattoos - not that there is anything wrong with that - and is incredibly patient.

He might be a money maniac sure, but his ability to control money so well the way he does just shows how high his IQ is. I find that amusing, since it's something hard to do. What I completely love to the moon and back about Goo is his creativity.

When he gets into fights, he is patient and maybe let's himself get hit a few times. That's a good thing because he has time to learn about what he is facing. I think that's neat, because not a lot of people think about that during fights, and he taught me to do that. Also, the way he harms people is very creative too, no matter how harsh that sounds. He stabs people with chopsticks, kicks people with a glass piece stuck in his shoe and harms people with a katana. It's all so unpredictable yet fits him so well. I really love the way he fights and handles situations because it tells so much about him. Also, he is so fun, who would do karaoke after beating a bunch of guys unconscious? Only your one and only Kim JoonGoo. He is such a fun person to study and to read about.

So, no, I will not put up with the bullsh%t that he would cheat on his s/o, because he is a very respectful and none judgemental person. Just because his fights look violent to you, and his friendship with Gun unstable, that doesn't mean he is a bad person. It just means he is different from you, and yeah, he does f%cked up things, I won't deny that. That's exactly what makes him an interesting character.

Xiaolong

Now, I personally don't like Xiaolong that much, so this will not come from heart, but a place of logic. For a disclaimer, I am not caught up on the latest chapters, because I want to binge read it.

Now, even though I do not like Xiaolung, I can see why other people would.

He is a responsible person, who takes good care of himself even though he has to look after Vivi 24/7. He is not only good in his job, but takes it very seriously too. He isn't afraid to take action to make sure his job is going smoothly, and that everything is on it's place. He would do anything to protect Vivi, which can be appealing to some.

And from what I saw from spoilers, he is very strong. No, admiring his strength does not make the person toxic or fragile. It means they find the place in their heart to appreciate the type of struggle and hard work he puts into it. He has an unique way of fighting, which I could only see a small portion of. However it's clear that he must be impressive. I completely understand if people find that neat.

Also, Xiaolong seems like such a f%cking loyal person. That's so incredibly important. A lot of people can find that appealing, for various reasons. I am aware there are poly people, or anything similar to that, but loyalty is so important for some people and can form a very deep sense of love.

Yeah, he might take care of Vivi when she is drugged and let her get away with drugs but consider this that's his job. He is payed to do that and swore to do his best in it, as it's very important to him.

Outro;

Yeah, I don't care, like who ever you want to and defend them, but if you drag down other characters and guilt trip people because of liking specific characters, you are not going to be "woke" or special. And I will find you, and e a t you. - For legal reasons, that's a joke. -

That is not the only post that I saw shame those characters and people who like them, but is the one that made me messed up.

This fandom absolutely loves shaming people if they love the character design and looks of their favourite character. Let me tell you something though; You are missing the point of the whole manhwa you are reading.

Finding people attractive and beautiful is completely normal. Treating them differently because of that is not. As far as I am concerned, I never saw any lookism fans hate on characters they find less attractive. - Rather on the attractive ones. -

People have a type and that applies to looks and personality. Literally everyone does, even if it's unconsciously.

If you want your favorite character to get more love, don't make other people's comfort characters look bad on purpose, because in their eyes they aren't simply the bad qualities you see in them. And if you highlight them at least make sure they are true or at least reasonable bad qualities.

Well yeah, that was my little rant. And I didn't even mention the psychological aspects of why each character is like, or in other words what people they might attract. Or, the difference kind of personal life experiences people had to go through to appreciate each kind of little detail about the characters.

Yeah, this is the end of my little rant. If this post will get actual mature answers and discussions, I will make a similar one for Vinjin, Logan, Olly and Jiho. Yeah, I hate all of them, but other people might not.

END

[suganovakawa]

𝐒𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐄 .

PAIRINGS : tooru oikawa x fem!reader , platonic hajime iwaizumi x fem!reader

GENRE : angst , romance

WARNINGS : cursing , car accident , amnesia recovery

SYNOPSIS : tooru doesn’t understand how special you are to him until he comes close to losing you forever . as he struggles to comes to grips with his feelings and balance it with his future , you still have to recover from your own injuries , but without your memories to assist you .

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍 < [ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ] > 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄

what is hajime’s deal ? what did oikawa do to him to get him so upset ?

word count : 1.3k

SAUDADE

( 𝐧 . ) a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant , or that has been loved and then lost ; “ the love that remains ”

⠀you weren't an idiot. you know, damn well at that, you are far from an idiot. and you sure as hell hoped hajime didn't take you as one. you lost your memories, not your common sense.

⠀it was quite obvious that hajime had that oikawa boy pinned up against a wall, and not in the dreamy way fanfictions like to describe it as. no, there was definitely unwanted tension between the two; it was evident they didn't like each other. despised each other, even. whether you had known of this before or after your incident, you wouldn't have been able to remember something like that.

⠀you really, truly hoped hajime didn't underestimate your observation skills, or your common sense. any random passerby would've seen the anger blazing those olive hued irises of his as he glared down at your classmate. was it coincidence that it was oikawa of all people that you two happened to bump into after school? you wouldn't have known of the brunet's reasons to have stayed at seijoh; then again, it probably wasn't any of your business.

⠀you wanted to speak up and confront iwaizumi as you had turned the corner - he was fast, but not fast enough to back up from the other before you laid eyes on the two boys. if the atmosphere between the three of you alone wasn't suffocating, you might've. it wasn't like you were afraid of confronting him. he seemed like a reasonable person, open to communication.

⠀in truth, it was oikawa you were worried about.

⠀the poor guy turned pale, the color draining from his skin when you entered the scene. as to why he had such a pitiful reaction, you wouldn't be able to guess. from the looks of his typical poise and attitude during school hours, he certainly didn't seem like the weak, bashful type. and according to hajime, he too had played volleyball alongside him. however, the universe seemed to not want you to know of their current relationship status - every time you asked, distractions would get in the way of an answer. in this scenario, oikawa’s silent plea for an escape was what drove you to play the oblivious card. the relief that shone in both of their eyes as you turned around to walk away sent your stomach in nervous turmoil.

⠀come to think of it, you were pretty kept in the dark about all of this. you only knew as much as hajime was willing to tell. the idea of asking others wasn't appealing to you yet; hajime seemed to be quite content being the only individual answering all of your questions. and while you were more than grateful for his assistance and his company alike, there was always that voice in the back of your head trying to reach out to you, but you had no idea what it was trying to say. it was too blurry to be put into words.

⠀you waited in front of aoba johsai with your arms crossed loosely at your sides, waiting for iwa to take you home as he had been insisting to everyday this week. whether he wanted this to occur everyday or not, that’s what it seemed like to you. you didn’t mind, but you wanted to branch out and find out who your other friends were. you spoke to the volleyball team at lunch time, and you enjoyed their company tremendously. alas, it was the only time of day you were able to give them, as hajime was quick to escort you everywhere, practically glued to your hip.

⠀the thought of you two being in a relationship crossed your mind, more times than one. it would be a valid explanation for his behavior. he acted the way a boyfriend should - walking you to and from school, helping you with assignments and keeping you company after hours, even offering to carry your belongings when you can clearly do it yourself. you appreciated and acknowledged the chivalry, but when it became too out of hand, you were curious. if you two were an item before your accident, was there a reason he hadn't told you yet? you remembered quite clearly what happened that first day you woke up in a hospital bed, he made it clear that you and him were just friends - nothing more, nothing less - but his behavior has been convincing you otherwise.

⠀"hajime - " you were cut off by the way he gripped your wrist - firm, but nothing that could hurt you. you wouldn't have been able to pull away if you wanted to, though. his strength outmatched yours. your words caught in your throat, he was angry, very angry. the scowl painted on his face frightened you; you hadn't seen him act this way all week. was this oikawa's fault? what could he have done to make him this worked up?

⠀"hajime, please slow down. i can't keep up with you pulling me around like this." your voice was solid enough to knock him out of his frustration, he jolted a bit and loosened his hold on your wrist so you could pull back. his hands clenched into fists, but you could tell he had calmed down. not all the way, but he was sensible. you were on your guard. usually you could read him like a book - he was always open to you. now, there was no telling what he was going to say to you next.

⠀"y/n, i have a request for you." his voice was quiet, soft spoken - as if projecting any louder would let off a bomb. "of course, you're not obligated to, but i would really, really appreciate if you could do this one thing for me."

⠀"sure, it's the least i can do to repay the kindness you've showed me all week. i can handle a simple request." your body was tense, and so was his. however, the tension was created from two different reasons. "what do you need from me, hajime?"

⠀"stay away from oikawa."

⠀you blinked. "excuse me?"

⠀"as far away as you can, don't let him talk to you, don't let him step near you, nothing. you shouldn't be with someone like him." your eyes shot open wider as your feet abruptly ceased walking, your chest dropping to your stomach as he caught onto your reaction. you didn't need to open your mouth, he knew exactly what you wanted to say. "he doesn't look like it, but he's a bad person, y/n. you don't need him in your life, you're better off without that germ infecting it. he's done bad things - especially to you. i don't need to remind you, i'll just plague your thoughts with bad things. you don't need to hold that burden."

⠀the vendetta he held against oikawa sent goosebumps through your body, and it wasn't anything comfortable. now he's telling you that he knows something about you he never bothered to tell you about before? didn't you have a right to know? if oikawa hurt you, shouldn't it be your business so that you yourself can judge if you should stay away from him or not? his lack of logic was beginning to concern you, but the glare in his eyes stated clearly that he was taking no argument. and since he was the one with all of his memories, you really had no room to impose.

⠀"... yeah. got it. oikawa bad. very bad. do not engage." hearing your compliance flipped a switch, he smiled brightly and nodded.

⠀"i knew i could count on you, y/n. believe me, you're much better off this way. the things he's done, are completely unforgivable. if you had your memories, you'd agree with me."

⠀maybe, but you wanted to be the judge of that.

a / n : this stupid taglist almost made me cry i had to do it six times because tumblr kept glitching on me n my dumbass kept forgetting to save it BAHAHAHA

wow i’m being productive lmao. second post in one night WOOOOO who needs school 😼 n e ways bit of a self promo but my new smau, rumor has it, is finally out! would be grateful if u check it out 🥺👉🏼👈🏼

taglist : @ot127 @rena0921 @karlitabi-rrito @psychicpercyjacksonfan @crescentbitch @amelimiles @damnirina @pasta-warlord @blossomingbangtan @clinomanians @i-am-kinda-in-a-lot-of-fandoms @manq-fandoms @citruss @sugar-wara @haikoo @anime-simp @kairostatue @awkwardspontaneity @iwantapoptartqwq @aquariarose @softestdreamer @plantisnotplant @avylee @froppysgirl @that-animebitch @wisepandaslimeland @samanthaa-leanne @dumplingzumispam @0hakaashi @captain-janeway @afterglowkuroo @bellabelieveme @attixca @chickenrest @tycrackculture @ynjimenez @lissa-writes-and-does-matchups @lavieenblancetnoir @dabilove27 @cuddleslut @crypto-s @keigosbitch @readeretal @shittykawaa @donghyuckster @adriloen @ella-solei @emiyummy @kukiisan @catyuyuyuu @sillykittt @dolan-mendes @kiritokunuwu @the-third-wall @yammers @monviemoo @dicerawr @psychopath-satan

taglist closed , i’m so glad you’re enjoying the series! 🥺🤲🏼✨❤️

[twelvedaysinaugust]

https://twitter.com/iicfhometolou/status/1514347000145354755?t=bZb3UxJgKEC7ZizS-RAiUw&s=19

Honestly, I'm all for logical thinking and trying to not jump to conclusions for when strange things happen. And I read your blog today and it almost made sense to me that it could just be a PR tactic and that it's all a part of promo and deliberate decisions to attract just the right people while still seeming normal enough for the gp.

But then I look at only the brave, and I see the environment Louis has been able to create. A lot of the people there holding flags and those lights do it because they're queer themselves. And they do it to stand in solidarity. And no matter what Louis has done, misleading larries at times or saying he doesn't appreciate what that side of the fandom has done, he's somehow managed to create a safe place for all these people. And a lot of them feel confident enough to raise those flags because they believe that he's also a part of the community.

At today's show, there were very strict regulations about pride flags because the country has laws against homosexuality. There were a group of people outside waiting to attack anyone with pride flags. Almost everyone in there knew about it. But they still bought their flags. Because the thought of only the brave without those flags supporting Louis seemed worse than the possibility of people getting hurt because of it. Which sounds so extreme and silly especially for a man who's said that he's straight.

But those people believe in something. And I refuse to believe that Louis doesn't understand that. And he's taking advantage of pointing at Larry signs and doing cryptic things to "signal" that he's part of the community only for the sake of promo. He doesn't owe us anything, I get that. But you have to believe the absolute worst of him or Harry to think they'd take advantage of queer people or anyone who's found comfort in their relationship. It feels wrong to even think about. And especially if their relationship was never real and they aren't together, how gross is it to continue to foster those rumors and make people believe that they can be vulnerable at his concerts because he's convinced them he's a part of their community? If that's your way of reasoning, then you should unstan rn because that's not someone you should be supporting anyway.

Antis and GP can come up with all the excuses they want about why a lot of weird things happen. I can't think of the amount of coincidences that happened today alone but if you want to ingore that, fine. But to point at Larry signs ( yes he has, multiple times. I was there at the shows), singing 7 (it definitely adds fuel to the fire and he's definitely aware of that) , singing change for the first time at the most random concert ever (only it's not random if you think about how YAH tweeted halfway home and yes it is halfway to Harry's album but did you know it's also the halfway point to Louis' shows in this tour? Funny coincidence isn't it?) And to end of, I would like to say, if they have been closeted for the past 12 years like I believe they have been, cryptic things like this and very meticulous planning is their only form of communication. They can't be obvious about it because if they could be, they wouldn't be in the closet.

Link

I agree with everything you said, and that’s why the notion of Larry-baiting makes me so uncomfortable. To take advantage of young queer people who relate to Larry would be kind of… evil. So, I wouldn’t say that I believe it’s all promo, I just kind of want to talk about that possibility. Because I do think it’s a possibility. I really don’t believe Harry or Louis would take advantage of queer fans - especially if Harry and/or Louis are queer themselves. But I also don’t know either of them personally. I don’t know what goes on inside their heads or in their personal lives or careers.

Again, I’m not going to die on the it’s-promo-and-nothing-else hill. Because that’s not really what I believe. But when fandom talks about certain Larry proofs the conversation always goes like this. Larries: “It’s genuine signaling!” Antis: “It’s coincidence!” And I just feel like there’s a third option that’s rarely talked about. Part of me feels like promo season is going to pass, Louis’ tour is going to end, and nothing much will come from this crazy month or two we’ve had.

I’m sorry, anon. I hope I’m not seeming too dismissive, because all your points ring true. I think it’s very, very possible that Larry have something going on right now. That’s what I’m leaning towards, at least.

I don’t know. It’s all very confusing because it seems very incongruent. Holivia still going on -> HS3 promo targeting Larries; Eleanor attending Louis’ shows as his girlfriend -> Louis pointing at Larry signs. I know long term closeting exists, but sometimes I wonder how H/L would have time for a relationship of their own in the midst of actively “stunting” with women, you know? Larries say the “stunts” are meaningless, just ignore them. But the fact of the matter is that “stunting” takes up a lot of H/L’s time. Sometimes wonder how a relationship could exist around that…

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

ooh! I have thoughts on Eridan!

okay so, to me, Eridan ties into this thing that homestuck has going on with a lot of its more morally grey characters... the question of how responsible young people are for their negative qualities and actions, and where the age threshold for personal responsibility is.

the characters in homestuck all straddle this line between being young enough to consider them victims of the forces that influence them, while also old enough to understand what they're doing and how it affects others... especially because a lot of these kids come off as really smart for their age, and very precocious. we've all been through phases in our lives that make us cringe, not because we're ashamed of something harmless, but because we recognize that we had absorbed something harmful, and took longer than we wish we had to unlearn it. it could be as simple as being kind of a jerk in a misguided attempt to seem cool, or as dramatic as actually hurting someone in an attempt to remedy one's own insecurities by putting down others to seem better by comparison... but how far can you push that before people aren't willing to forgive? before people abandon the notion that better guidance and more appropriate role models could reform someone? and it's especially interesting when you consider how old homestuck's core audience might've been when they first encountered this story, and how it affected their perception of the characters if they saw them as peers, rather than as children from an adult's perspective.

so to talk about Eridan, I wanna frame this in terms of his classpect, because it actually goes a long way towards contextualizing his behavior. Eridan is a prince of hope, meaning that he destroys hope or uses hope to destroy... and this can be seen in practically every conversation he has. if Eridan is contacting someone, it is because he expects something of them. advice, or consolation, or a solution to a problem he's having... it's always something. when he contacts Kanaya, he wants her to auspistize between him and Vriska. when he contacts Feferi, he wants her to give him encouragement, and maybe date him when he asks. and in every case, the way he demands these things by being rude, whiny, or self pitying, makes people reluctant or unwilling to give him what he expects. he destroys what he hopes to obtain.

it goes deeper than that though. Eridan has absorbed this ideology of sea dweller superiority from living on Alternia... and he actually takes it way farther than it even makes sense to. the aristocracy on Alternia use the lower class for all sorts of menial work that they feel entitled not to have to do themselves. they might have the ability to freely cull individual low bloods for any reason, but eradicating all land dwelling trolls would leave a lot of unpleasant yet necessary tasks with no one to do them. I don't think Eridan actually wants to live in a reality where sea dwellers have to pick up the slack of doing things like sanitation work, or construction or something... but another concept that is heavily tied to the hope aspect is delusion. Eridan is exaggerating. he's trying to agree with Alternia's ruthless class structure so hard that it's actually kind of absurd. but Feferi calls him on that... she says she thinks that he self sabotages on purpose. because he knows, at least in some capacity, that the consequences of getting what he "wants" would actually be really uncomfortable to live with.

so not only is Eridan's goal to destroy... it is also a false goal that he constantly undermines. and all of his waffling between grandstanding and self pity destroys his romantic prospects, which are what he actually seems to want the most.

if you look at the way Eridan pursues relationships, he actually makes a lot of logical sense, but not a lot of emotional sense. he's idealized the act of perfectly filling the relationship requirements of each quadrant. he wants Feferi to be his matesprit, which is purely based on the fact that she's high enough on the hemospectrum to be an appropriate match in terms of status. he wants Vriska to be his kismesis, and Kanaya to be their auspistice, and there are hints that Karkat might've been someone he was considering for moiraillegience, though it wasn't emphasized as much. and there you go! his goal is specific, but it's based more on ideals than on the actual needs and feelings of the people involved, and it's totally self centered... he always wants them to cater to his own needs. the reason why he gets as nihilistic as he does on the meteor, is because all of his endeavors to achieve these relationships are falling through. he feels like he has no hope of mending his existing connections, because he still only sees them in terms of people either giving him, or not giving him, what he wants. but the rest of their race is dead. as the last twelve trolls in existence, they only have each other as romantic options. and as Eridan gets more and more desperate, he gets more and more demanding, which is the exact quality that drives everyone away from him to begin with, and it culminates in him having a "if I can't have what I want then nobody can have any of their hopes either" meltdown.

to backtrack a bit, I wanna reconsider questions such as, when is a kid old enough to be held responsible for their own negative qualities? like... when are you comfortable with ceasing to blame environmental factors? when are they just a bad person? is it after they've refused a certain number of chances to make better choices? when do they reach an age, or level of bad behavior, that makes you think they can't be helped to reform from these negative qualities? where does an adult lose their patience for the idea that a kid is just a victim of their upbringing?

obviously Feferi is Eridan's peer, but these are basically the questions she grapples with when she talks to Eridan. it's like growing up next door to a kid whose parents have some aggressively wrong-headed political stances. as you grow, that kid might mirror their parents' way of thinking... and by the time the two of you are in your teens, it's hard to ignore how much of a jerk that kid is becoming. but you've seen them at every step of their development. you know where it comes from. maybe theirs is the dominant political belief in the community, even if your own parents aren't like that. maybe you wonder if you would've agreed with them if you grew up under their circumstances. you've felt the pressure, but you haven't lived in it like they have, and maybe if they just had the chance to grow up under different conditions, they wouldn't be this way. and you are aware that you could be an influence on them... maybe they need you to help them see another perspective. you always got along so well as kids. when did things even change? and that's kind of where I imagine Feferi is at when we're introduced to her and Eridan. it's a crossroads between believing that you might still matter enough to them to change their outlook, and the persistence of their ingrained beliefs. it's tiring to do that kind of work, over a long period of time, to minimal results. when is the appropriate time to give up? in this way, Feferi's own hopes for Eridan fade over time. she says at one point that she was mainly acting as his moirail so he wouldn't try to underfeed her lusus and kill the land dwellers that way. she's not sure how serious he is, and she can't take that risk. deep down, I'm pretty sure Eridan knew he was never actually going to commit a genocide... but his need to grandstand, and legitimate belief in his caste superiority, had convinced Feferi enough that she still felt obligated to manage him as though he was a real threat.

these characters are thirteen years old. they're right at the edge of childhood and adolescence... right at the age where children aren't quite so innocent. they want to assert themselves. they aren't mature, so there's a lot of responsibility that they still shouldn't be trusted with yet, but they've become aware enough to feel like that's demeaning, and to want to be taken seriously. in an effort to make people acknowledge them without looking down on them, they'll try just about anything. they don't have the experience to know what they're doing yet, so it doesn't always work in their favor, and that's frustrating. you can see bits and pieces of this in homestuck's characters. like with the way they try to paint themselves as an authority on something, or shit talk each other in order to emphasize their own strengths. it's a really interesting theme, because homestuck pushes some of these young characters really far in terms of how bad the things they've done can be, or how much their lived experiences have taught them that what they're doing is acceptable. they can be really self aware in some ways, and come off as really childish in others. it's hard to know what you'd do about them in real life... and your answer changes depending on your own age and perspective. it's a really cool gray area to poke around in, and homestuck is excellent at it.

wtf I like Eridan now

[ectora]

REVIEW 313

took me some time to actually get into that review lmao But i really loved the episode. I know some people will probably have complains about it, but as someone who absolutely loves Abigael, I really liked it. And honestly the fact that abigael was finally included in the main story is not even the reason why. I loved the pacing, it actually felt like Charmed. The stakes, the construction, the format, it was all on point. It was genuinely their best episode alongside 307 (two episodes related to the tomb lmao) and one of their best in the show imo.

I've put it in "hidden" cause it ended up being so long I did not expect that im sorry 😭

SCREEN TIME

Maggie: 29m20s

Macy: 27m36s

Mel: 25m39s

Abigael: 20m17s

Jordan: 10m32s

Harry: 47s

Not gonna lie, I did not miss Harry this episode. Maybe it's just cause I don't like the way they have been writing both him and Macy this season, way too focused on the relationship, but his story does not really interest me. And I enjoy watching Macy interact with other characters a lot more. I think we could have had a little bit more of Jordan as well.

What I liked

where do i even start. I genuinely enjoyed so many things in this episode.

As said earlier, I really enjoyed the structure of the episode, to me it finally really felt like charmed. The way the episode was done was beautiful and I LOVED the trial in a general manner. They're terrible lawyers, but still loved it lmao

Ok hear me out, the fact they had abigael and macy say what the fan had been saying but reversing the roles was actually sent me lmao

I really enjoyed that they balanced the rights and wrongs of abigael. I'm part of the people who think that overall, most of what she did was not that deep tbh, but the episode allowed to have nuances and hold her accountable for things she did while also recognising that she did good things.

Abigael finally interacting with the sisters. To me, that's the sign of good characters tbh, how they can interact with different other leads/mains and such relationships being interesting. Abimel, i'll talk about it a bit later cause i have lots to say. But AbiMacy ? I absolutely always love their scenes, one of the reasons being that I genuinely think they're the two best actresses in the show and you can really feel it when they're on screen. They have easy chemistry and whatever they are doing, they just work. They also had one of the best potential of the show in terms of dynamic and I will never forgive the writers for ruining this, especially because it's in part because of a man. Anyway, their scenes were amazing to watch and I need more. I was especially happy because let's be honest, if Macy has valid reasons to dislike Abigael, they often miss-portrayed that in the show and it often came across as being mostly based on the whole love triangle between Macy Abi and Harry. But this time it really was not and Macy was quite fair, even reaching the conclusion Abi doesn't belong in there - she does not- and I liked that they actually were fair on Macy's dislike and distrust. Then there was AbiMaggie. Honestly, it's not a relationship i expected to enjoy that much but oh god i love them. I loved them in episode 207 and I still do. They just have such a funny dynamic, I can't even explain it correctly but it just work. They're throwing remarks at each other sure but it's almost in a sweet funny way. Abigael calling Maggie 'Legally Brunette" was so funny and cute at the same time.

Talking about Maggie, I really liked her this episode. I love how she reacts in situations where they need a cold head. She takes the lead, she does what needs to be done and she reaches the goal. I really enjoy seeing her taking that role a little bit more. Especially because to me Maggie was always the one with the most nuanced view on the world which I really appreciate. I loved her speech at the end and she grew so much since season 1, she's really so great. The more we advance in the show, the more she shines.

I really liked what happened at the end with the sisters recognising that they are themselves not perfect and are even chaotic. I have a point about being chaotic for later but anyway. Yes the sisters are not perfect. Honestly, they have done questionable things in the past themselves and often are the cataclysm of new things happening. I think it just makes them more interesting and better characters. Black and white can only get so long. Nuanced, imperfect, that's where the complexity lies and what is more interesting imo.

The perfecti really are good characters. I mean their logic was completely f*cked, but they are so entertaining to watch, it's actually great. I like also that they continued that idea that logic without emotion is dangerous. But in some ways tbh, the Perfecti are not even logical. They want to think they are, but their own logic is flawed and like Macy said, completely lacks context.

Finally the power of three and FINALLY, the plot goes forward. Maybe that's another reason I really enjoyed the episode, the fact that it actually had a good flow, it felt like one constructed episode and it actually advanced the story which cannot be said about a lot of the episodes. So I'm happy that happened.

And finally Abimel. I mean, no one can be surprised Abigael has feelings for Mel tbh, girl has not been subtle about it lmao But that declaration was actually cute and their scene at the bar ?? paralleling the one in season 2, it was so sweet. I just love them tbh, and I really think they could have been the ship a lot of us were waiting for in the sapphic community especially.

Abigael's past. Like I loved learning more about her past and her mom. Obviously her traumatic past does not exempt her from her own actions but I do believe it give strong grounds for redemption. it also gives us a lot of insights in her character. Her mom was an absolute monster and what she did to her was terrible. There is no surprise in Abigael's absolute lack of self worth and her unhealthy coping mechanism. Like her mom basically spent her life telling her she was deficient and then punished her for something she had no control on whatsoever. She punished Abigael for her own action and her own liaison with a demon. She probably projected her anger about that relationship on the child that came out of it and it's absolutely horrifying. Like no wonder Abigael is not fond of witches and went into the demon side tbh. Like that's not surprising at all. It also explains why she was so against the idea of witch = good that the sisters keep perpetuating because that's simply not what she experienced. Again, it does not excuse everything she did but I do believe it helps understand the character better and that ultimately, it gives space for a redemption. And again, kuddo to both poppy and the actress who played her mom. First that was great casting and it was really well played.

Remarks

To be honest, I don't really have things I genuinely disliked so I'm more gonna do like a section where i could criticise some of the aspect which to me did not necessarily made sense but were often still funny, and who knows maybe done on purpose. It's gonna be a mix of a little bit of everything.

One of the first thing I was kinda confused on was their use of the term chaos. Because, well, chaos doesn't equate evil. But that's the angle they started taking at the beginning which to me was confusing. It didn't make the episode bad, but the more I think about it, the more I'm like the defence they were going with had nothing to do with the charges 😭 Like, the sisters tried to prove that basically Abigael was a good person. But the charges were that she was chaotic. and by the end of the episode we did reach that kind of point where they said everyone was chaotic and everything - which i liked - but also didn't really match the angle they took the entire episode. Because, I personally never saw Abi as evil. But she is 100% chaotic like that girl is the definition of chaotic and I love her for it. But her doing good or bad is not necessarily what makes her chaotic. Good deeds can be as chaotic as bad ones. For example, Abi binding her own power could be considered as good by some people (it's not really but you see what I mean) but by doing so, she would lose the title of overlord and therefore end the treaty. In that case the war would start and that would definitely be chaotic. If she was to stay overlord however, and control the demon world, which can be seen as bad i guess, she is keeping the war from happening and stopping attacks toward witches and innocents, which is the contrary of chaotic. So yeah, the angle they took did not actually make that much sense cause the two are not the same.

Not gonna lie, bringing Godrik up was so weird to me cause like he tried to kill her first and they all know it, yet she was the one said to try to murder him and I was like ? did we all forgot what happened ? 😭

Some of the things brought by the perfecti - such as her killing those humans or demons - seemed weird because like, the sisters did the same in the past 😭 But also that's part of the whole lack of context aspect I guess.

No they really used Francesca as a witness out of all the people in the world like the woman is a whole child abuser who asked help to the elders, which have been established as like, not good people lmao I know it was part of the whole the perfecti are very selective on the information they actually take into account and they use the information as well as twist them to fir their own narrative but still it came across as weird because that woman was the definition of evil. But that's also what ticked the sisters so well.

Why did they not call Harry to testify was also kinda like ... weird. I mean at the same time I can't really complain but still, it was a bit odd. Also the fact they never thought about showing what was abigael actually doing with Jordan lmao I mean it wouldn't go along with the plot but still.

Ok, that take is subject to controversy and I know it but anyway : to me, Abi stealing Macy's power was ... not that deep. Don't get me wrong, the story was bad. The execution was even worse. In the show itself tho, objectively, as an act, it was not that bad. It actually made a lot of sense for Abigael to take it for herself. Macy wanted to get rid of her demon powers, no one was forcing her. And Abigael actually asked her multiples times if she was sure. Macy definitely had her reasons to do so. But at the end of the day, Abi picking them up when they were gonna disappear in thin air is really not that bad. It's logical. Don't get me wrong I'm glad Macy is getting them back, but I also think there has been a lot of mix up between the actual act of stealing the powers and the way it was done/optics ( I still don't understand how anyone wrote that scene and was like, yeah kneeling is a good idea ??? Like what's wrong with you 😭). But like ultimately, the act itself is not bad. questionable ? sure. Evil ? really not. Like let's be honest here. Abigael never hid who she was (past ep3 obviously). She did not pretend to be an angel, nor that she was a good samaritan. At the end of day, the sisters knew who she was and how she worked. They came to her knowing this. At some point, there is a need to acknowledge that, she was no angel, but they knew that and still went to her. She said it herself, she is used to fight for herself, and she'll sting to protect herself first - which i personally don't really hold again a character. If you go in bed with a scorpion, you can't ignore the fact there is a chance you're gonna get stung. Plus, when Abigael "stung" she also actually still gave them what they wanted/needed. I personally never saw self interest negating a good action. I don't really care if she gets something out of helping. Like at the end of the day, why wouldn't she take them ? In some ways however I do understand why Macy would be mad, she asked for help and she didn't realise Abigael stole them and she doesn't like abigael in the first place so why would she be ok with Abi taking them. That's valid too. But objectively, it was more a she was offended and mad that Abi herself had them more than a it's a terrible thing to do kinda feeling. So like it's a bit of a weird situation because Macy being annoyed and mad is valid but at the same time, it's really not that bad in itself. But overall that story should have never existed in the first place. And certainly not happen like this.

Abimel. I loved it but I also have issues with it. Mostly based on the fact we learned Poppy was leaving the show. And not gonna lie, I cant stop myself from feeling like it was almost a bit .. baity if I dare say. They had basically admitting having feelings for Mel and low key hoping it could lead somewhere when honestly, if she's leaving, they did not need to make it romantic. Because honestly, watching this episode not knowing she would leave ? You'd definitely could think it's happening, especially with all the other hints in the past. They could have made it like more about how Mel was the one giving her a real benefit of the doubt and they had a connexion and she wanted to be worthy of that. It would not be romantic. Especially cause she admitted caring about all sisters so it would have worked. Again, don't get me wrong, I want the most Abimel i can get lmao but also it feels a little weird. It's complicated. 😭

Jordan is definitely coming back, I just wonder what are going to be the circumstances. I completely understand why my boy needed a break. Like their time in the tomb was long. We don't exactly know how time works there but remember, in episode 7 when the sisters were stuck, the normal time was like what ? hours ? while in the tomb it was days for Maggie. So there it was days in normal time so in the tomb ? could potentially feel like weeks, months even. So yeah, give him a break and some time to breath. I know they're dragging this whole Joggie thing but because of Covid i also understand and will let it go. I really like them tho.

Abi has some alcohol problems I feel like should maybe be talked about. Like she uses it as an escape, as a way to numb her feelings. There is a reason it was used to symbolise her submitting herself to the tomb. And her first reaction after leaving the tomb was drinking. When she feels unhinged or vulnerable ? She drinks ? When she lost the title of overlord ? She drank. Alcohol is her escape which is a bit worrying.

Not about the episode but I think it needs to be brought up. I've seen people trying to say they brought up the abuse storyline for abigael out of nowhere and like. Listen I completely understand not trying to give more thoughts to a character you dislike, that's fair enough. But saying that storyline is out of nowhere is just a lie. The only new elements we had here were the details of the abuse she went through. They showed the clip again in the episode, where Abigael talks to Mel about her mom. She rejected her, she made her felt, deficient, wrong. All that is emotional abuse. She said her mom tried to fix her which can easily be thought about physical abuse. Like none of these things were new. To be honest, not a single thing they clarified/established for abigael this episode does not follow up with what was in the show in the past. Her feelings for Mel were honestly rather obvious at this point. Her not wanting TCO to get hurt ? There is literally a scene where Godrik tells her it's her head or the sisters and she never really even thought about throwing the sisters under the bus. She even asked who knew and it's easy to think it's because if no one knew she could put it under the rug. Again, it's fair enough for people to dislike her to not try to put more thoughts into her motivations or scenes in a general manner, but then you can't really say things are out of the blue.

And most importantly, I'm sorry, I don't care if you dislike the character, but if you dismiss the abuse just because of the dislike, that's a problem. What a character goes through in her past does not, in any way, have to change your opinion about them. Whatsoever. However when it comes to issues like child abuse, the bare minimum would be to be respectful of the subject and not say "she deserved it", "should have done more" or just say you don't care cause that changes nothing. Again, it doesn't have to change anyone's opinion at all and it does not excuse behaviours, but man, minimal respect is not that hard.

Highlights

This episode genuinely had such funny moments, i loved it.

« Is this a hard time to admit I failed debate in high school ? » and « could the defendant keep her commentary to herself » competing with each other for the funniest part of the episode. The delivery was perfect on both part. And Abi and Macy interactions are always so good and them bantering more or less seriously all the time is sending me. Macy was just so annoyed with her, i loved it.

« Need something legally brunettes » I said it already but I loved that little scene between AbiMaggie and that line particularly.

Abigael went from saying "I could care less about any of you" to "because I deeply care about her" followed by a whole ass declaration AND admitting she does actually care about all of them. My girl got absolutely played and it was genuinely so funny. Like Abigael was so freaking smug about testifying against herself and she got played so hard, she was SO annoyed it was actually hilarious.

"Every battle I fought, I fought alone" like excuse me while I'll go cry in a corner. Again, Poppy has been absolutely killing her role this season.

"Your arguments are illogical" the perfecti have such audacity like girl have you heard yourself ? 😭 no one is being less logical than you right now.

Lmao when Macy said Abigael belonged into the tomb, Mel was not agreeing 😭 And Maggie was having none of the drama either she just wanted out.

The sisters realising they had to be Abi's character witnesses lmao it was hilarious pleas idc.

Theories

With Poppy Drayton leaving, there are two theories I kinda have. Obviously Abigael is either gonna die or leave. Ngl, I can feel the dying one coming more but well, that brings the two theories.

Abigael would sacrifice herself. Which I don't like but honestly let's be honest, there are 95% chances of that happening. I could see her sacrifice herself for Mel or for the sisters in general. But that's where my abimel issues are coming. I love abimel. I want the most abimel i can have until the end. But Abigael admitting have feelings for Mel just in the purpose of having her sacrifice herself for her and to be 'worth it' ? that's not only a byg trope, it's also lazy.

If she just leave, which wouldn't really make sense to be honest cause why would she just leave, would she give up the title of overlord (why even) or would they bound her powers (i would hate that) ? but anyway, if that's the case, I could actually see her learn Waverly is not actually the one rejecting her. Waverly could very possibly not be the one who communicated with Jordan and the sisters. No one ever saw her, the letters are only signed by her name. It's a bit sus tbh, so nothing stops it from being Francesca actually impersonating her daughter to keep her away from Abigael.

I want to know more about the perfecti. We know they killed charmed ones before, and it doesn't seem like charmed ones existed when they were created ? Maybe the charmed ones were created after they went into the tomb ? I still am not sure about them going into the tomb by themselves tbh. But also they don't seem to be evil in the sense they want power or whatever, more in the fact like they consider themselves perfect and that if someone stands in their way, they'll just get rid of them.

[alottamoney]

This is very frustrating because you can't be messaged.Nevertheless I would like to share something very serious with you. These are strictly speculation. Firstly I would like to clear my position with Taekook.Long story short: I believe them.

Quite recently I stumbled upon a theory about Taekook's coming out process that seemed very logical to me.The summary of the theory is, the art that BTS has been releasing from the beginning,or from 2015-16 to be exact, have been quite evidently inspired by Taekook's journey from discovering themselves, to then losing themselves, to then finally be able to find their happiness and true-self with each other.From Stigma, to DNA,to FAKE LOVE.A lot of BTS songs are talking about a hurtful love filled with sadness.Also, the kind of songs Taekook listens to and covered from the beginning traces that journey from sadness to happiness.From the official songs,Singularity, The truth untold,Heartbeat,House of Cards,Whalien,Make it Right to name a few.It's justified to assume that BANGPD supports them and love them.But if it is so then why the separation from time to time?According to this theory it is to prepare the ARMY very slowly to getting used to Vkook.We have seen since 2017 taekook is used to promote the Album the most,to hype it up,and once the Album's released,it's the watchful eyes again.BangPd was very supportive of Jkwon,a kpop idol who likes drag.But he also told him that you cannot throw a stone into a still lake and expect everyone to be fine with it.It will take a long time to get the water to settle down.What bangpd is doing with Taekook is he is engineering a very long process of getting people used to the message of acceptance through messaging of their album,love myself,be yourself.He is creating a generation that is used to these ideas so that when that stone lands,there will be no ripple.

Now nitpicking time.Tae and BangPD share a mutual dislike for each other.It's not a secret.Because Tae made it obviously clear on many occasions. Everyone in the kpop world knows it.Starting from Taekook's relationship, V was being portrayed as a non-essential member.Idk if it was a coincidence,but taekook is the king of coincidence and the timing somehow matches.It got to the point where he had only 1/2 lines in a song. If you know Tae's journey, you would know and I'm not gonna elaborate the extent to which it was bad.I also get the feeling he doesn't like Kookie's personality(he doesn't respect him) because he has a psychological need for Tae built in him.The golden Child of BTS.If BangPD is supporting Taekook and engineering their smooth coming out,and taekook are in on it,then why do they seem displeased when separation happens?It has happened so many times that there is no other option to consider than them being unhappy with the situation.

My pessimism will take over from this point.It's about money in the end.I personally believe BangPD supports lgbt.Before elaborating on my point I want to present someone else's viewpoint who I had a discussion with.They are even more pessimistic than me.A bit hilarious too.According to them if BangPD really supported Lgbt he would not try to corner Tae like that.It's an unwritten code among lgbt that you hold each other's relationship up despite your personal things.According to them BangPD used all these messages for marketing purposes and used Taekook and the members as a gimmick for it.That's why he was okay with Jikook but not taekook.Tae did not like jikook happening on stage to the extent it was happening but it was given a free pass in the name of it being just a job.According to this person,an lgbt supporting person would never do something like that to a lgbt relationship.Scary stuff.

Now my elaboration : BangPD is not necessarily protecting Taekook or BTS,he is protecting his investment. He wants to engineer a smooth path for their coming out but only under his term?I know before military it's unthinkable and even after that, my opinion is Taekook are not the declaring in a statement type couple.They prove by actions,not by words.That's why I am a bit confused as to what pd's thoughts are regarding Taekook future.All I know is that Tae does not like it when someone instructs him how to behave in his own relationship.He's been throwing middle fingers left and right to whoever can see.If they are not on the same page with Pd's plan for them,then....what?On a sidenote: I am sure JJK and KTH1 mixtapes are getting delayed due to profit sharing issues.You just know they are going to break every record out there.V said in 2019 that his mixtapes were ready for release that year,and he wanted to see how ARMY react to it and then he uttered something very interesting"It's going to be delayed anyway"..then he laughed in the brattiest way possible at the staffs while spoiling 😂 BH couldn't get that sweet sweet money from "Sweet Night".Going back to my previous point,it really seems like everything is connected to money.Does BANGPD want a situation where if Taekook have to come out,whether by accident or something else,he can be there to take advantage of the situation?Like saying he supported them all along,and the money will come in as support for them pours in.Idk how that will a viable situation.For one, Tae will consider eating poison before agreeing to letting PD use his personal relationship for circus,and it's fair to assume BangPD knows it.Then what about the possibility that PD really is like a strict parent,who wants the best for his children even though his methods are torture.Did he think taekook not being a couple was in their best interest?Taekook's interest/BTS' interest?Like I said, I personally believe pd supports lgbt.He doesn't like Tae's personality,his rebellious streak.I could be wrong but would his personal dislike move him to create tough situation for taekook even though he supports lgbt.It seems unlikely because wouldn't it create unhealthy environment within the group,pd must have known this.Or did he think it's just a teenage romance,one push and it will break easily.All of these possibilities because all I have gotten that TK are not happy when their relationship is micromanaged.

Now there's Lisa in JK's Vlive correcting his steps in Euphoria.Guess we are all delulu at this point.I really think that was Lisa though.Don't ask.I'm sorry for this long ask.Please share with me what you think.

Hi anon, I'm happy that you shared your views on Taekook. My opinion on this topic might be disappointing but I'll share anyway.

First, I don't have a coming out theory because I don't think any BTS member would willingly reveal any sort of romantic relationship because of the fan frenzy around them.

I don't analyze MVs, lyrics, and such because these things involve a lot of input from a lot of people: producers, composers, lyricists, designers, stylists, choreographers, etc. It's much more than just BTS sharing personal stories and trying to find clues about the members' private lives from them is a pointless venture according to me. The covers and song recommendations made by Tae and Jungkook in the earlier years, like you pointed out, have more weightage in this regard.

About Bang and his relationship with Tae and Jungkook: I think there is a large gap between fandom perception and what has actually been shown. While I don’t think Tae is Bang’s bias, I also don’t think he dislikes him or is out to sabotage him. It is even possible that him “favoring” Jungkook does not extend beyond his potential marketability. He seems indifferent for the most part to them as individuals. Assuming Tae and Jungkook are in a relationship, I agree that maybe Bang did not take it seriously until he had to. He could also have done a lot more damage than just separate them on screen or cut them out of content so I don’t think he micromanages them outside work (or may he tried and Tae and Jungkook are just that inseparable🤷🏻‍♀️). He might even consider it beneficial, not in a direct financial manner but in that it makes them easier to control and monitor- two less NDAs to worry about. It doesn’t help that Tae and Jungkook are also very erratic in a way that can’t be attributed to company micromanagement. That could explain some inconsistencies, they’re also figuring it out (and they’re a bit dramatic about it in my opinion).

Jokwon hasn't said anything about his sexuality explicitly, I don't know if this counts as an example of Bang's support of the LGBTQ community but he seems open-minded enough and he hasn't said or done anything homophobic. Tae and Jungkook though are part of his biggest cash cow so, while he might not be homophobic it's not a stretch to assume he has different standards for them vs Jokwon who isn't signed to his label. About using the members and Jikook as a gimmick, I think that is simultaneously complicated but also not that deep and it’s probably a separate discussion; in short, I don’t think Bang is thinking farther than taking advantage of and promoting a popular (easier?) ship but it seems to have affected the relationship of the members involved (Disclaimer: I don’t think that all permutations and combinations of relationships between the members have a possibility of being “real”. I don’t think it’s an everyone loves everyone situation.)

Will Bang or the company try to take the credit if Taekook are outed by accident? The way they act, I feel like they are pretty confident that no such thing will happen. In the very minute chance that it does, I think they'll wash their hands of Taekook and let them fend for themselves. I don’t think they’ve done the groundwork to benefit from such a situation nor do I think they are making it easy for Taekook. The narratives put forth in In The Soop and other content do the opposite of cushioning the blow. There’s no overall consistency and it’s really hard to predict how such things will play out, so I don’t know if they have any plans centered around Taekook right now much less back when they discovered that Taekook might not be typical bandmates. 

I'm not sure what you meant by that last paragraph but why Lisa?

[londonsquitebiggg]

The One -Chapter 2

^^college campus^^^^

Krista’s POV,

After school I headed home and did the usual, helped mom cook dinner, talked with my parents about our days. My dad asked me about Harry and his friends whose names I didn't know. I blushed profusely at the mention of his name, not wanting to be drawn back in to the thoughts I had about him... they weren't the most appropriate which isn't okay because he is obviously not my mate because he would have said something to me, right?

Either way I shouldn't be having these kinds of thoughts about him.. especially because I've never had such vulgar thoughts about any guy no matter how hot they were. Not to mention I'm supposed to be focusing on the fact that I'm going to have my first shift in two days, plus it will be my birthday and we'll have a huge party.

You see, in the werewolf community your eighteenth birthday is the same amount of excitement humans get on their twenty-first birthday. Just instead of getting to drink and become an "adult". It's when we shift for the first time and we get our wolf, we get to start our training, and not to forget we can start searching for our mates.

With me being the Alphas oldest child it's a pretty big deal. My parents are throwing a HUGE party. Inviting every pack member to show off their pride and joy of a daughter coming of age. Once I shift and find my mate, they will take over the Alpha position from my father and ill become our packs Luna.

"Krista, sweetie did you hear anything that I just said?!" My father exclaimed, frustrated that I was not listening to what he was saying.

"Sorry daddy I was just lost in my thoughts. I'm really nervous for my shift." Was my response knowing that he was go easier on me knowing that I was scared. You see I've always been a daddy's girl. My dad and I have always been super close, he wants me to know everything there is about being a good leader and person.

"I was just saying that we should invite Harry and his pack mates to your birthday party. Might be a good opportunity for them to find their mates seeing as our whole pack will be in one place?" Daddy responded.

My breath caught in my throat and the thought of them being there, him being there, making it a lot easier to find out if he is my mate.

"That is a great idea! Would you like me to ask them or would you like to relay the message?" I asked, hoping he would leave it up to me so I would have an excuse to talk to him again.

"You can do it, I do believe that Harry is supposed to be coming over tomorrow afternoon so that I could catch up with him. I haven't seen him under non-pack related circumstances since his mother and Robin got married. But seeing as you'll see him before me and it is your party, I think you should be the one to invite them and show they are welcome here." Was his response as we all finished and mom started cleaning off the table.

After being excused from dinner I decided to retire to my room for the remainder of the evening. I started reading over the notes I had taken today and going over the semester notes before changing into my pajamas, washing my face, brushing my teeth and heading to bed. Not being able to keep a certain brow haired green-eyed man out of my mind.

****************************** THE NEXT DAY *************************************

"BEEP, BEEP, BEEP"

Another morning awoken by that lovely sound. My morning consisted of my normal routine, as finished I walked into the living room where my dad was sitting, I walked over to him and kissed his cheek.

"Morning daddy, I'm off to school I love you see you later"

I walked into the kitchen to tell my mother goodbye, while also grabbing an apple and granola bar before grabbing my bag and walking out to my car and drove to campus. As I pulled into my parking lot and I saw Harry standing there with his group of friends. What a beautiful sight to see first thing in morning. I wouldn't mind starting every day staring at his god like face.

I shook that thought away and shut off my car, grabbed my things, and got out. It was almost like he sensed I was near he turned around and checked me out while taking his bottom lip in between his teeth and winking at me once we made eye contact.

I have to admit, when he does that it's so sexy and a turn on... WHAT AM I THINKING?!?! I felt myself starting to blush so bad that I probably looked like a tomato. I did the only logical thing I could think of, I ducked my head and started walking with my head down into the school as quickly as my legs would carry me.

Harry's Pov,

I was standing outside school talking to the guys about how I am going to talk to the Alpha today about me finding my mate... I know what you must be thinking, "Harry, why not just tell the girl? Why put her and yourself through the torment of waiting?" well you see in the werewolf community, if either party is not of age the older wolf must ask for the families permission before starting a relationship with each other.

Trust me I'm going crazy not being with her but I've been waiting for her for eight years, I'm sure I could last a few more hours until I go speak to Alpha Mayfield to locate her family and go figure out claiming what is rightfully mine!

Speaking of my lovely mate I was knocked out of my thoughts about all the things I couldn't wait for once I was able to officially say she was mine, when I caught her delicious scent. I turned around to gawk at her when I let out a deep but quite growl at the site of her.

She had on a white tight-fitting cropped tank top, with a red, white, and blue flannel shirt over it, light blue Jean SHORT shorts, and converse. Holy shit I was that is girl is trying to kill me! Like hell how does she manage to look so incredibly sexy yet still innocent???

I saw her looking at me and I bit my lip and shot her a wink looking to get a reaction out of her, I know she was trying to hide it but I saw a splash of color make its way onto her perfect face.

******************* AFTER SCHOOL AT KRISTA'S HOUSE******************

As I walked up the front steps of the Alpha's house, I was mentally giving myself a pep talk. I mean, I've known Alpha Mayfield for most of my life but having to tell him I met my mate and figure out how to initiate contact is a big deal. I knocked on the front door. I heard heavy footsteps approaching and I straightened myself out when Alpha Mayfield opened the door.

"Ah, Harry my boy, it's so great to see you again. Please come in, come in."

As I walked in the door there was a faint scent of my mate as if she was here recently, I assume she must be friends with the Alphas kids.

" It's good to see you too sir. Thank you so much for allowing me and my friends onto your territory to look for our mates. It means a lot to us to have your cooperation with the matter. I'm sure you will be delighted to hear that I have indeed found my mate." I told him while I followed him into the living room taking a seat on the couch as he took a seat in the recliner.

"OH! This is great news!!!! I'm so thrilled for you Harry, tell me who is the lucky girl?" Just as I was about to respond to him, that lucky girl come rushing through the front door. I figured that she was here with the Alphas daughter. So, imagine my shock when MY lovely mate walked straight up to the Alpha and gave him a huge hug and kiss on the cheek.

I was stunned! Is she trying to make me mad? Didn't she see I was right here? Are they together? He has a mate and so does she.... ME! and not to mention that she was a lot younger than him... what the bloody hell is going on her...

"Hi daddy how was your day?" Came Krista's greeting, breaking me from my troubled thoughts. It all made sense now, she wasn't his daughters' friend, or his lover, she WAS his daughter.... Holy shit....my mate is the Alphas daughter!

Telling him who my mate was just got a whole lot harder! When I tell him Krista is my mate is there is a 50% chance I am going to be killed. I mean I don't think he would because he knows me and everything but he's an Alpha and we are talking about a twenty-six your old man coming in and taking his only daughter as his own. I know if it was my pup, I would be ... well let's just say if the guy didn't leave with his tail between his legs, I didn't do my job right.

" It was a long day sweetheart! Krista, you know Harry right? He's one of the wolves I told you about, I know you said you were going to invite him and his friends to your party. Oh! And good news he found his mate!" Alpha Mayfield told her with excitement, I could have sworn I saw disappointment flash across her face but she quickly covered it.

Krista's Pov,

NO!!! He can't have mate! I was supposed to be his mate, this totally sucks. I'm so upset I just want to run to my room and cry. I have to suck it up and find out who she is so I can scope out my competition. WAIT! What the freak am I thinking?!?! in less than two days I will be able to find my mate, I can't not fall for this guy who already has a mate!

"So Harry, who is you mate? She sure is a lucky girl! It really is so exciting that you already found her." I fake enthusiasm and acted like I'm not dying on the inside.

"That's for me to know and you to find out" He responded adding a wink at the end.

"I still need to talk to her father and your dad um, because I'm not sure if she is a full wolf yet and also, we don't want you to spoil the surprise now do we?" he was really nervous and distracted as he finished his statement. I don't understand why he is so distracted; it couldn't be because of me could it?

OH MY GOD HE HAS A FREAKING MATE ALREADY GET THAT THOURGH YOUR THICK SKULL!!!

"Well I'll leave so you guys can talk then. Congratulations Harry, she's a lucky girl" As I started to walk out when he calls out "I'm the lucky one" and winks at me I try not to cry and blush, let's just say I bolted out of the room faster than ever before.

Harry's Pov,

I have no idea how to phrase all of this, I will just have to tell him privately in hopes that she can't hear us. Let's just hope I make it out of this alive!

"Sir, do you think we can discuss this somewhere more private? I don't really want to risk anyone hearing." I ask trying to keep my voice from shaking. I mean don't get me wrong I'm not a wimp! But when you find out that your mates father is the Alpha or the strongest pack in the United States it's a bit intimidating.

"Oh, of course come on we can go up to my office. Follow me" We both got up and headed upstairs. As we were we passed a room which I assume belongs to Krista because of the smell, Marcus starts going crazy!

"Mate!! Go to mate claim her as our, mark her so everyone knows who she belongs too!!"

I had to ignore the urge which is super hard considering I'm an Alpha. Once we find our mates the pull is so intense it hurts to be without them if you haven't marked them. I just kept following Alpha Mayfield until we got to a set of French doors which I assumed led to his office.

My assumption was confirmed as he opened them and walked in taking a seat behind a huge desk in the middle of the room.

" So, Harry you mentioned that you weren't sure if your mate was of age yet. Do you know her name? I can look her up in the packs database and then take you to the right place."

I didn't know how to say it, so I kind of just blurted it out.

"KRISTA'S MY MATE!" My breathing heavy and eyes wide as I waited for his reaction. The look on his face was pure shock which then turned into one of fury.

" WHAT?! When did you find this out?!" He screamed back at me, face turning red in anger.

"Sir please calm down, I found out that she was my mate yesterday and I only just found out she was your daughter a minute ago I swear! Had I known who she was, I would have come and spoken to you sooner. " I was scared to say the least. I didn't want to be disrespectful but I also wasn't going to be a coward. I knew what I wanted and that was MY mate, my other half, something that was mine and was made for me just like I was made for her!

"Well you can't tell her that you're her mate!" ... Who the fuck does he think he is? I mean yeah, he's her father and I want him to accept me, I would like to have if approval. But I don't give a shit if he is the most powerful Alpha around, he has no right to say I couldn't be with my mate! I decided it was time to give him a piece of my mind. I don't fucking care if I die, I wasn't going down without a fight!

"Well why the fuck not?!?! I have a right to be with my mate. I don't care if you're the bloody alpha or her father you can't stop me!! You were the one who invited me onto your land so I could find the person that the Moon Goddess created to complete me, And you want to deprive me of that? Deprive your daughter from being with her mate!? " I was really fucking pissed off he has no right to make that decision.

I was trying to calm myself down I could tell that Marcus wanted to take control, I'm sure that my eyes were pitch black right now. If I didn't calm down, he would take over control and there is no telling what he would do.

"Oh Harry, calm the hell down would you! I give you my blessing. I couldn't think of anyone who would be a better fit for my little girl than you." He said helping to calm my anger.

"It's just if you go and tell her now, she won't be able to experience the thrill of finding her mate. The experience of seeking out your smell, locking eyes for the first time and knowing that your hers. I mean I can already see that she is attracted to you, and by the look on her face when I said you had found your mate showed that she is somewhat feeling the effects of the mate bond" He continued.

I could understand what he was saying but I was still confused.

"So what do you expect me to do? I wont be able to hold my wolf or feelings back forever." I told him slightly irritated.

"You don't have to wait forever; you just have to wait two more days. On her birthday she will have her first shift, then she will be able to seek out her mate and you guys can be together. You'll come to her party, heck you and your friends are like a group that sings right? You guys can play at her party." I had calmed down tremendously, still irritated but calm.

Let me just say...

This is going to be the longest two days of my life!!

Krista's Pov,

After I left the living room, I bolted up the stairs taking them two at a time. I opened my door and slammed it closed locking it and flopping down face first onto my bed.

All I could think about was Harry and his mate, who wasn't me. I have this pit in my stomach. The thought of him with someone who isn't me making me nauseous which made no sense to me. I should be happy for him; he has been looking for his mate for eight years and he finally found her! I'm going to start looking for my mate in two days so it shouldn't affect me, I should be focusing on my own mate.

But the thought of Harry and I not being a possibility makes me not want to have a mate. How am I supposed to be seeing him with someone who isn't me? Act like seeing him show affection to another doesn't make me sick? Why do I feel like this?

Is this normal? Why did he have to stumble into my life and make it so difficult?! Why did he have to come and make me like him? I shouldn't be feeling these things for a mated male who isn't mine! I don't understand why he would flirt with me if he had a mate? Maybe Ashlyn was right, maybe he is a player. Maybe he thought that I would be easy, Fall for him just because he's super hot and I'm a nerdy, insecure girl.

I mean I guess in a way that was true, that is what is happening, but I was going to put a stop to this! For the next day and a half, I was going to avoid Harry as much as possible and then once I shift and find my mate I won't even care about, I'll be too focused on my mate and my Luna training starting.

This starts now. I got up from my bed, deciding that I've spent too much time and energy on the god like man that is Harry Styles. I walked to my bathroom turning on my bath faucet and dumped in my strawberry bubble bath, I needed to relax and not think of him!

After shedding my outfit from the day and stepping in. Breathing out a relieved sigh, this is just what I needed. All my tense muscles relaxing, loosening. Sinking into the water deeper, I slowly started drifting into a dreamless sleep.

********************************** 20 Minutes Later *******************************

There was a knock on my bathroom door, my Mother waking me up from my relaxed sleep. My water has gone cold, my fingers and toes are all pruned from the exposure to the wet environment. I pulled the plug, and stepped out of the tub onto my soft bathmat.

Changing into my pajamas and heading down to eat. Picking at my food until I couldn't eat anymore, the pit in my stomach coming back full force. I decided I have had enough of the awful day I retired to my room for the evening. After turning on Netflix and finding "Pretty Little Liars" I curled up in my comfy bed full of fluffy pillow and soft blankets. Eventually falling into a thrilling dream that may or may not have involved a certain green-eyed man.

*****Krista's Room****