#absolutely hilarious i hope sm are embarrassed

[jisungshotfirst]

Levanter anon: sounds like SM Entertainment is having a chaotic time once again.

On a more lighthearted note, if you look at the graph of SM stock prices going down, it looks like a cat now. 'Tis the EXO-dus cat!

But jokes aside: what will happen to EXO now? How many group members would be left in the company (assuming the don't also leave after the first group of members)? Where will the leaving members go?

Also, will this affect other SM groups? I am not the most familiar with them, but I hear SM groups are very interconnected, with NCT and Superm and everything. So will other groups have members leaving?

Hello!! they sure are hahahhaha

omg we love<3 jfjfdj exo's legacy :')

So there currently Chanyeol, Sehun, Kai, Kyungsoo, Suho and Lay are still contracted with SM. Chen, Baekhyun, and Minseok are still in exo of the moment - they've left the company not the group and so unless there's official word after all the legal stuff that they've left the group - they are still in the group! the contracts will be them individually contracted as SM artists, not as members of EXO so they don't lose that when the contracts gone until SM declare it. Sehun... is unpredicatable so i can't say anything for sure 😭 but he is basically sitting back atm with popcorn watching it go down so i imagine that whatever the outcome he will step up and try something himself hahah the others i truly don't know! Kai fucked off to the military right as the drama's happening so we won't get his news for a while 😭 the contracts are kinda frozen/extended over military enlistment periods i've noticed so he won't be doing anything until it's over. The leaving members are very likely going to go get signed to other labels/ set up their own ! i can imagine they have a plan, and considering they're suing together at once i can imagine they have a plan together! it would be great for us fans to have them sign to the same company but you gotta remember this is their first free decision about their career they've prob ever gotten so they should go with what they want individually and find companies that will suit them and work well with them<3

oki so I think there's a lot that could happen if u compare it to other groups! they could definitely do a got7 where they are in different companies focusing on solo stuff but manage to do a full-member comeback by organising it themselves between all their companies (if only once or twice </3). Or you could look at snsd. snsd came back through SM but 3 (?) of the members aren't under SM anymore - it was just something arranged between all companies involved and i can imagine that the non-SM girls got well compensated 😭 but yeah - something like that could happen if there's some relationship between the members and SM... which doesn't seem particularly likely considering the lawsuits but anyways it's a possibility hahaha!

about other SM groups! it will be affecting poor taeyong trying to promote his solo atm thru all this drama 😭 and as you said about the stock prices - that does inhibit the other groups. However, if they win the lawsuit, one can only hope that would encourage better artist treatment and fairer payout around the whole company!! and if SM don't do it themselves, the other artists would have tonnes of info on how to beat SM in a lawsuit 😭 so we can hope they use it well<3 but yeah - the icky thing about companies is that although they are all artists with similar contracts, the treatment and payout could be extremely different between all the groups :(( and within the same group (read: luhan and tao lol). and good old misogyny when it comes to rv<3 so each SM artist could have a different experience and some could have it much worse than others.

okay so i just read some articles and it's so funny djfgjjdfgj what i'm understanding is.. cbx were like 'yo can u provide us with the info on how we've been paid for 12-13 years' and sm are like 'no. i don't want to.' and sm are CONVINCED that some other evil company leaders have been talking to exo and getting them to sign with them and illegally go against their SM contracts. which very much could be true but it's not illegal to have discussions with other employers jgjdfg and SM are still like 'we have your best interests at heart, not those evil outsiders!'. ... they r so funny fkgkd. also their contracts were literally 12-13 years long... not the usual 7 recommended by the government.... and the contracts they r terminating were written in nov/dec 2022 and were extending them another 5/6 years...and SM's current defence is "no ur lawyer doesn't know the law properly we aren't in the wrong".. so .... unless some miracle is pulled I don't see SM coming out of this well since they're not rly cooperating at all.

but yeah.. i don't see a swarm of artists leaving SM happening, mostly because a lot of them won't have the luxury as EXO have to do that. And especially if they're also stuck in 13 year contracts... which is ridiculous. so yeah :(( but we can hope they get better treament!! and soz to any superm fans if there are any of you 😭 superm is a done thing i'm afraid</3 lucas flopped, baekhyun's suing and then it'd just be taemin in an Nct unit KJFGKFJGK. so yeah no more superm. but nct will prob truck on - they are SM's priority there's no denying it so they'll prob be fine. tho they are tragically suffering with the loss of sungtaro so like... </3 rip to them but infinite Nct flopped to me the second sungtaro left, like no one else matters</3

[thekeeperof-thefandoms]

Headcanons of Lucifer watching his s/o and Charlie getting along and maybe even having a little musical note together I just know he'd be getting all teary eyed and shit seeing his baby girl having some form of mother figure or someone she can really look to for advice currently present in her life ❤️ Thanks sm hope u have a good day/night!

Absolutely!

I think at first the relationship between Charlie and anyone her dad dates is awkward because she's so nice and trying to be supportive and Lucifer's new s/o would be trying too hard to create that bond. But steadily, you two would find real things you have in common and begin spending time together.

I'm going to use myself for reference here, but I personally really like arts and crafts kind of stuff and am willing to listen to pretty much all genres of music as long as I like the beat/rhythm. So I imagine most of your bonding is done making posters for the hotel, doing crafts with the guests, and just in general vibing to music together.

Like, one suggested activity for the group is coloring because it's a good outlet and it becomes so popular you guys just have a permanent stack of coloring pages and books available with marker, pens, colored pencils, and you, Charlie, Lucifer, and Vaggie are all just coloring and talking, Lucifer's telling embarrassing stories about baby Charlie for you and Vaggie, and you share a few embarrassing stories of yourself to make Charlie feel better and the absolute relief on her face is palpable.

Charlie is nervous because some sinners critiqued her hotel, her appearance, how her dad had to bail her out in the fight against heaven and it's all just making her upset. And of course her dad and her girlfriend are gonna say stuff about how she's beautiful, the hotel is a wonderful idea, and she was so brave in that fight. And like, yeah you're dating her dad and you've been super nice so far, but when you sit down next to her and ask quietly, "Can I offer you some advice?"

"Please? I feel like I don't know what I'm doing."

You laugh, patting her shoulder. "You're young, Charlie, you're not supposed to have it all figured out. But one thing you can do, is decide not to let judgemental pricks get to you. Take every criticism with a grain of salt. Improve, adapt, and filter out bullshit. You can't make everyone happy, and you'll exhaust yourself if you try. So as long as you're happy and at the end of the day you can say you're proud of what you've done, that you tried....well, that should be enough, right?"

Charlie thinks about it and nods. There's a visible shift in her attitude. "Thanks, I needed to hear that....Do you think you could help me read through some of the reviews and stuff? I want to improve if there's any genuine issue that I can address and Dad and Vaggie are....a lot. They just keep trying to tell me everything is perfect."

"They're just trying to hype you up. They love you a lot, so naturally they want you to feel successful and excited. Come on, let's go make some big bowls of ice cream and read through those reviews using silly AI voices. It'll be hilarious."

You and Charlie head off to do just that, talkin and laughing, and neither one of you notices Lucifer absolutely melting into the floor from a few floors up, as he clings to the railing he was leaning against to ease drop. He's gonna need a few minutes to recover. He's crying happy tears. His little girl is grown up and getting along with his partner and they're spending time together and enjoying things together. You're giving her advice and offering her comfort and meeting Charlienat her level and he's just more convinced you're perfect.

He may or may not be ring shopping in the near future. Probably with Ozzie and Bee. They've always had good taste and will probably be thrilled to help him. And if Ozzie is also casually looking for a ring while they're out, well, Lucifer won't say anything.

[lafleshlumpeater]

being besties w/ Luci would include?- (God I feel like I'll get a lot of opposition from everyone because a lot of followers and you love marauders but oh well)

: ̗̀➛ ꜱᴏ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏɴɪɢʜᴛ?

ˢᵉⁿᵈ ᵐᵉ ᵃ ᵖʳᵒᵐᵖᵗ, ᵃ ᵗʳᵒᵖᵉ, ᵃ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵃ ᵍᵉⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵖʳᵉᶠ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱ'ˡˡ ʷʳⁱᵗᵉ ᵃ ᵇˡᵘʳᵇ ᶠᵒʳ ⁱᵗ!!

lucius malfoy masterlist remus lupin masterlist

"And then, the lupin boy had the audacity to talk me down! 'you're not the only prefect around here, malfoy,' he said. the sheer disrespect!" lucius exclaimed.

the corners of your mouth twitched upwards. "how very dare he!" you tried to sound as genuine as possible, but to be honest, you found the whole ordeal hilarious.

"i know! and-" he paused for a second and sighed. "you find this funny, don't you."

your eyes glistened with mirth. "no," you continued to almost mock your best friend, continuing to braid his unnaturally platinum- blond hair. " i think it's... quite... uhm...." you try to hold your laughter in in vain, eventually letting go of his precious locks to cover your face as you snorted into your hands. "oh my god, malfoy, you are so pathetic."

"i am not pathetic!" he exclaimed in protest. "just because he's friends with them, if he wasn't he would get them in so much trouble, detentions every day-"

"hey, leave remus alone, he's done nothing to you!"

"please, just because you have a crush on him!"

lucius was muttering angrily after you had heard him practically yell the common room password and marched into the dungeons, and when you had asked him what was wrong you had expected for him to say anything except for begin to rant about one of your classmates-nearly-mates, mates. who you also happened to have a tiny crush on. but that was besides the point.

you scoffed in retaliation. "just because he got a higher mark than you in the last arithmancy test."

"you didn't deny your little crush." he ignored the snide comment directed towards himself and mocked you instead.

"i don't like him," i murmured, concentrating at the task at hand to ignore the fact you were blushing slightly. "and shut up, you're ruining your hair."

"ow!" he muttered mock- angrily as you pulled a lock of his hair. "watch how i embarrass you in front of him tomorrow."

"you watch i don't cut your hair off in your sleep, malfoy."

"i know you wouldn't, love."

he was teasing you for the nickname remus had oh-so-casually called you when asking for an extra quill the day before, and you had blushed the hardest you'd ever had before even processing what he had asked for.

cringing internally, you were quick to snap at lucius, but it was all in good intentions- that was how you two worked.

"shut up!"

"i didn't hear you complaining when he called you that," he drawled. you slapped his hands away from where they were prodding and poking at his hair, trying to figure out what style you were doing.

"leave off, you absolute menace," you hiss. "that's different."

lucius was about to come up with another witty retort when barty threw a book at the two of you from where he was trying to sleep on the sofa, his arm sprawled across his face. "shut up, both of you. i'm trying to sleep, you're worse than regulus and bellatrix."

"shut up, barty," the two of you parroted in unison.

"just because evan left you for a 'puff girl," you snorted.

this time it was an inkwell which you dodged, well- practised at the sport. "try again, my friend."

"or DON'T!" lucius practically shrieked as he failed to avoid a cushion which you smirked at. "shut up, you."

"i didn't say anything."

"yeah, well.. shut up."

"yessir."

"... don't let cissa hear you saying that."

you and barty gasped.

"malfoy!"

"ooh, kinky," barty smirked.

you flipped him off in response. "shut up."

lucius smirked. "i mean, is he wrong?"

"ooh, scandalously kinky!"

"SHUT UP, CROUCH!"

barty features bc he's my bff

anyways hope you like this<3

(i hate adding tags to things sm smh)

taglist: @kimorna @quickslvxrr @bibliophile-dendrophile

READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.

[n0bamak1s]

mutual - mai zenin x reader

request: “Could you write mai x non-binary s/o, where mai is realizing that she has a crush on s/o, it'd be funny to see her reaction when the s/o get asked by todo before they spar, abt the kind of woman s/o like, and s/o just shrug and answer 'mai, i guess'.” - @814519

summary: reader seems to take a liking to mai, who refuses to acknowledge her schoolgirl crush on them, and todo somehow manages to be the one to get them to stop dancing around their feelings for each other. (genre: fluff, mutual pining, slice of life-y)

warnings: swearing, mentions of fighting, mostly just fluff

word count: 2.7k

a/n: i’m sorry to take a long ass hiatus again but i have some fics i’m working on rn!! thank you all sm for being so patient with how slow i can be T_T btw this one includes some very mild miwa x reader as well just as a heads up lol!

when you first transferred schools in order to master your cursed technique, your first instinct was to raise an eyebrow at your classmates. the lineup of students in your school consisted of a boy who might as well be a bodybuilder, a blonde girl whose hair seemed to defy gravity, an awkward looking stoic boy clad in traditional clothing, a girl with a gun holster on the side of her baggy pants who wore a bored expression as her gaze met yours, and a normal looking blue haired girl standing next to some rusty looking robot. with all their strange hairstyles and odd clothing choices, combined with how nonchalant they were about their mechanical companion, they might as well be the cast of some forgotten sitcom from the 80s.

after introducing yourself to your stiff new classmates, you were whisked away to be led to your dorm by the blue haired girl (would you call her a “bluenette”?) who you learned was called miwa. as you walked, you asked her questions about her cursed technique, to which she sheepishly smiled and explained how she was the most “useless” of the students.

in response to her shameless self deprecation, you simply scoffed and sent an easy smile her way. “you really shouldn’t beat yourself up like that miwa, if you do it’ll be much easier for your opponents to.” despite the teasing nature of your words, you really did hope you’d managed to encourage her a bit.

miwa turned to you with bright eyes and a sincere smile. “that means a lot, really! it’ll be so nice to have an upperclassman here who isn’t so intimidating. i’m always so nervous to ask mai for help with stuff, so it’s nice to know you believe in me!”

her smile was infectious as you mirrored your junior’s facial expression. “there’s no need to be scared of them you know, believe me, just because they’re older doesn’t mean they have any idea what they’re doing.”

she shrugged in response. “i guess you might be right, this morning mai was practically shaking in her boots about getting to meet you, so maybe it’s all just a tough facade!”

you thought back to the girl who had introduced herself as mai.

what first caught your eye was the way she carried herself. while next to her other classmates as she introduced herself to you, arms crossed over her chest and back straight, as if it was an attempt to look high and mighty. rather than a proper introduction, she simply told you her name, before looking away boredly. the both of you chose to ignore the way todo teased her, before turning to introduce himself with a smug smile. he opened his mouth to seemingly ask you something, but was quickly cut off by mai stomping on his foot, sending him a harsh look. she glanced back at you with a slightly softer expression and a monotone apology for “his idiocy.”

you chuckled quietly at the idea of the girl who presented herself as so blunt and cold getting all nervous at the idea of your arrival.

breaking you out of your reminiscence, miwa waved her hands in front of her nervously as she turned to you. “just please don’t tell her i said that!” her guilty expression rivaled that of a kid who’d been caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

before she could continue in her nervous exclamation about how intimidated she was by her senior, you grabbed her hands that had been motioning wildly to match her words. “don’t worry miwa, i’d never sell you out like that.” you let out a small chuckle as you examined the genuine worry on her face, to which she just sheepishly smiled. it was funny to you how scared she seemed of her seniors, but it couldn’t help you from getting an odd urge to want to protect the small girl.

“besides,” your smile turned sly “, if what you say is true, i bet mai would be too shy to even talk to me!” a loud laugh escaped your lips as you continued your way down the dorm halls with long strides. behind you, miwa sped up when remembering she was supposed to be the one escorting you to your dorm.

“come on, that’s not fair to hang it over my head like that!” she whined as she managed to match your pace.

as miwa trailed ever so slightly behind you, you caught sight of a newly familiar head of dark hair (under the fluorescent lighting you couldn’t entirely tell whether it was green or black.)

“mai!” you called out to the girl you’d been newly acquainted with, raising one hand in greeting and slinging the other around your very embarrassed looking juniors shoulders.

the girl you’d shouted to turned to you with heavy lidded eyes that gave her face a bored, almost annoyed, expression. her turning your way was quickly followed by todo, who you guessed had been standing next to her, glancing over the hallway corner to meet your gaze. those two made an odd pair, from what you could tell. in contrast to mai’s impassive greeting, todo had introduced himself with booming confidence, before going on to complain to utahime that he’d have to leave in order to make it back to his dorm to score tickets for a concert featuring takeda. in the moment, you had to stifle a laugh at the memory of such an intimidating looking dude having a huge crush on an idol with absolutely no shame about it.

mai opened her mouth to say something, but was quickly cut off by todos roaring voice. “hey new kid!” his demeanor had been as confident as you remember, despite the fact that you were pretty sure he’d forgotten your name in the short time from when you had left to see your dorm. you gave him a smile and a lopsided wave in response.

“did you snag those tickets you were worried about earlier todo?”

“easily.” he bragged as if you cared about getting a pair of tickets for yourself. “however, earlier i meant to ask you a question, but SHE,” he pointed a thumb annoyedly at his companion, “very rudely interrupted me by stepping on my foot.”

“todo…” mai’s tone seemed warning as her eyes flickered between you and him.

“as much as i would LOVE to hear what your question is todo, i really do have to go unpack” you smiled abashedly, pulling miwa to your side, who nodded with wide eyes at how unphased you were.

“it might be better to ask when we spar later.” he shrugged. “that way i can really hear your impulse answer.” he crossed his arms, clearly to look intimidating.

“works for me! i’ll see you then too, mai.” you winked at her as you tugged miwa along behind you. mai huffed at your embarrassing show of flirtatiousness, but you didn’t miss the slight flush of her cheeks as she turned from you while rounding the corner.

even as you were close to the door of your dorm at the end of the hall, you could still hear mai berating todo for how embarrassing he was.

“i think she likes me.” a cat like grin overtook your face as you stopped in front of your dorm.

“utahime said your uniform would be folded on your bed, once you’re changed you can join us for sparring.” miwa smiled bashful smile. she’d probably chosen to ignore your previous statement in hopes of not being dragged into any drama.

“thanks miwa!” you grinned and gave her a friendly pat on the shoulder, to which she simply looked away timidly.

“it’s no problem, really.” she waved off your appreciation. “but between the two of us, i think you may be right about mai liking you.”

she bowed before running off, probably to get ready for sparring, leaving you grinning like an idiot in response to her revelation.

maybe the feeling was kinda mutual.

you were quick to change into your all black uniform pants and jacket, then breaking into a stride to the yard where sparring took place. that was, until you realized you were wandering rather aimlessly considering, you know, you didn’t really know where the yard was yet. peering around the hallway, your eye caught on an oh so familiar girl adorned in baggy black pants.

“hey mai!” you almost had it in you to feel bad for approaching her yet again.

almost.

“i’m kinda lost, d’you think i could walk with you?”

she nodded a yes in response, motioning with a hand for you to follow her.

after a one too many moments of awkward silence, you decided you’d have to be the one to bite the bullet and break it. “you know that thing todo was saying earlier about having a question he needed to ask me?” she looked up in a way that made her seem as if she’d just been brought out of being lost in her thoughts.

“what of it?”

“do you happen to know what it was? he seemed pretty serious about it.” well, as serious as todo could get.

to your surprise, mai attempted to stifle a chuckle, before a laugh managed to slip past her.

“it’s this totally dumb thing he likes to do.” she tilted her head slightly back so she looked at the ceiling as she talked. “to size people up, he likes to ask them what their type in women is.”

you let out a snort as you laughed, though you couldn’t say you were surprised.

“he seems like such a hopeless romantic, it’s hilarious.”

“yeah.” a soft smile painted her face. “but you’d better get an answer ready, if he thinks you’re too boring he’ll beat your ass.”

“really now?” you raised an eyebrow, to which she nodded in confirmation. “what does he classify as ‘boring’?”

she shrugged. “depends. whenever someone prefers personality he either beats the shit out of them or starts crying.” it was clear in her tone how exasperated her friend made her.

“what did you say? when he asked you?” you turned to face her fully, which made her realize how close together your faces were. for just a beat, she paused to examine your expression. despite your earlier teasing, you seemed sincere in your question. either you were oblivious to the blush spreading across her face, or you chose not to tease her for it.

before an answer could leave her parted open lips, she was interrupted by a voice calling both of your names.

“hey toshinori!” you smiled at the stone faced boy in front of you as you used mai’s shoulder as an armrest.

“it’s noritoshi.” the monotony in his voice made you stifle a laugh. “and you guys are running late for sparring, what were you even doing?”

her eyes glowered in his direction, clearly not in the mood to play hall monitor with him. “i was just being welcoming to our new classmate.”

he ignored her passive aggressive response and turned to you. “todo keeps asking where you are, so you might wanna hurry up.” with a swift turn, he began walking down the hallway with long strides.

once he seemed out of earshot, you burst into laughter, and from your arm you could feel mai’s shoulders shake from repressing a giggle.

“he walks like a goddamn penguin!” you referred to how his arms were wide at his sides and his stiff steps.

“him and mechamaru walk the exact same way, i’m starting to think he might just be a more advanced robot.” her dry tone was combatted by the way the corners of her mouth turned up in a lopsided grin.

“though, we should probably get going, even if i get a pass for being new here, i’m not sure how utahime would react to you being late.”

you didn’t notice how her eyes softened at your concern for her as you beckoned for her to lead the way.

“i don’t think she’d mind, after all utahime loves me for my pep and bubbly spirit.” her voice oozed with sarcasm while you smiled to yourself about how you’d managed to get her to loosen up.

the walk to the sparring field was quick, and it made you wonder how much time you two had taken just talking at the end of the hallway. you were greeted by the sight of your strangely styled classmates (plus the literal robot) beginning to split into pairs. before you could turn to mai with the question of partnering up, you were greeted by a todo with a firm hand on your shoulder.

“we’re partnering up, new kid!” it was more of a declaration than an offer. you smiled awkwardly as his shadow enveloped your figure, seeing mai be whisked away by momo out of the corner of your eye. if you’d looked close enough, you’d have been able to see the annoyed look mai sent at todo and the smug smile momo flashed at mai and her obvious display of jealousy.

you planted your feet on the ground that was caked in dust and prepared yourself into a fighting stance, with fists raised and legs steady. though it seemed you’d gotten prepared to defend from an attack that wasn’t coming. instead, todo marched over to you confidently. mai glanced over from her sparring, knowing exactly what was coming.

he called your name in his usual booming voice, which you were surprised he actually knew.

“what is your type in women?” he towered over you, his expression dead serious despite his absolutely ridiculous question.

feeling mai’s eyes trailing you, you glanced over to her. she mouthed something to you about not saying personality. you failed to hold back a chuckle, which seemed to snap todo out of his intimidating glower.

his gaze followed yours, which was still focused on mai for the briefest of moments.

“ohhhh i get it…you’ve got a thing for mai, huh?” he sounded like a child about to blackmail their sibling.

a furious blush overtook mai’s face practically instantly, while momo covered her mouth with a hand to suppress a laugh. you glanced between a boastful looking todo and a tomato looking mai.

“yeah i guess you could say she’s my type.” you shrugged nonchalantly, to which you could hear mai sputtering something about how you were just trying to embarrass her. miwa had a sheepish look on her face as she walked over to check on mai, though it only seemed to make her more flustered when miwa asked if she wanted to go to the nurse.

while witnessing the admittedly charming trainwreck happening in front of you, there was a moment for you to look back at todo.

“are you CRYING?”

“i have no shame in it. it’s like mai is my daughter and i’m walking her down the aisle at her wedding.”

“it’s absolutely nothing like that, todo.”

he ignored your blatant confusion at his reaction. “young love is so beautiful. you have my full blessing to date mai.” he sniffles and wiped his nose, then held it out for you to shake, to which you scrunched your nose in disgust.

“thanks for the ‘blessing’ and all, but now that we’re done with that, i think i should go spar with lover girl over there.” you threw your thumb over your shoulder to point to mai.

“you guys should join me and takeda for a double date! we can arrange a date once she finally answers my calls.” todo had a large grin, shameless about his tear stained cheeks.

“how about it?” you raised an eyebrow at mai, who had become significantly more composed in the time you hadn’t been looking in her direction.

“absolutely not.” she deadpanned, though her impassive look didn’t last very long as she leaned over to whisper in your ear, cracking a small smile reserved for you. “i’d rather we just hang out without that oaf, you know it’s embarrassing for them to see how you get me acting like a schoolgirl with her first crush.”

the moment paused for a split second for her to glance at todo, who was staring you down like a disapproving father.

“plus lord knows takeda isn’t answering him anytime soon.”

“I HEARD THAT!”

[cooloddball]

Someone submitted something in my inbox and they wanted to remain anonymous. Since this is an extremely long essay, I will put it under the cut. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

xxx submitted: hey, i was the one who ask what do you think of Misha and Jensen's current relationship First off all thank you for your answear it means much to me cause im easy to be convice and this person who keep telling me that they are no longer friends can be so convicing, so I'm actully trying to forget what she said 😅 so I'm just writing a few. she said that since they no longer work together, they will forget about each other, and do their common things like the gay jokes, face touches ect. With other people, and neglect each other, don't talk to each other, and then meet new people who will replace the other. And and she talked about the gish thing, she said she sure they didn't talk since the end of the series, because Jensen didn't know where Misha was and Misha didn't know about the Radio Company vol 2 (but i saw people say that, they were just pretending, because Misha liked something about Radio Company Vol 2, before the gish live, so in theory he already knew then or something like that) and She said Misha wrote a poem about Darius not Jensen and now I will write down what she sent me : I saw a post about Jensen's current activities on social media, and I've come to the conclusion the only person he doesn't interact with is mish. Sadly this makes my break up theory even stronger. I feel like this is a goodbye to one of the biggest parts of my life. They've moved on from "uk what I haven't told you today? That i love u"+ from "miss my only jensen" from "i love u misha i mean it from the bottom of my heart" from "jensen has no flaws" from "misha is the funniest thing ever happened to me" from all that love and affection from everything they developed together and now they're apart leaving their lives like nothing happened and call me a dramatic but they both have the same energy now as someone has after a big break up. and Jensen comments on almost every of his friend’s post except Misha’s"+ Jenmish is genuinely the best thing that has ever happened in my entire life. I owe them literally everything. They're the reason i hold on. Unfortunately on this essay i have to start using past tense verbs for them, and i have to continue on that. I don't know for how long y'all been in spn fandom. But even if u joined one year before the show ended you'd know how close and intimate jensen and misha were. Everything about them was unmatched.+ The chemistry and how they just fit eachother. They had always been all over eachother. Like they were holding on eachother for dear life. They completed eachother and were like world's most powerful thing. They were the definition of soulmatism. No matter where, they ALWAYS kept interacting with eachother. Each possible tweet or insta post. On cons that the other wasn't there, the other one would bring up the othere's name for no absolute reason. +The looks and repeated love confessions. How invested they were both into eachother. The family they had built together cuz we know how close dee and mish are (look all the charity work they've been doing together recently). There are youtube videos to proof everything I've said so far.When i say break up, my real intention is that they've grown apart. Everything started in the the third or forth month of pandemic. Before than jensen used to interact +(comment mostly) on almost all of misha's posts. But after a while everything just stopped. At first personally didn't care that much. Bcuz I believed too much in them that I thought not even the gods above could separate them. I told myself maybe they spend long hours chatting or video calling and that's why online public interactions are gone. But as it passed it almost diminished to zero. Except some likes from jackles and eventual ones from misha there weren't anything else.+ We got absolutely no content and the show went off too. We were helpless and were sticking to everything we had Dee had a big social media shot down, so as jensen. Misha was busy with the election. We got some interviews for it with all of them. But we didn't get much.except remember both of them pulling a bff

move. and texted eachother during an online con where everyone else were dead-serious about politics? That flickered something in me. That showed me that+ they can't ever possibly let eachother go. And the times everyone else were talking and these too would just talk random things together (the one jackels had a white hat on with stacy abraham).And then Misha posted that for jensen's bday We really overlooked it. That shit was too intimate. To close. Fav march baby? U just don't go around and called ur bestie baby and when u mean it deeply. Especially not when ur friend is jensen ackles the "I suffered form internalized homophobia my whole life+ but fuck my wife's an angel and i have an angel bf too and another angel which is his wife but I'd rather die than come out cuz my asshole dad pulled a John winchester on me". It doesn't work like that. But uk how mish is. Carefree and open. I believe they got into a fight bcuz of this. He didn't even like the post. AND that was when the tiny bit of interactions we had was gone too. For a while jensen didn't even liked his posts. After a month it started again.What made me finally believe in that they had grown too+ far: I still remember the night misha posted that he and jensen were going to have a con for gish together. I remember how hard I cried. Lile the whole world was given to me. But deep down in my heart I knew that something would definitely happen. It didn't sit right with me and unfortunately my senses never lie to me. Jensen showed up at the wrong time bcuz of misunderstanding the time zones (this was HILARIOUS). That's not even my point.+ I've seen that interview 3 times so far. It always reminds me of when i saw my ex at a party and we were both so thrilled to see eachother and we still loved the other dearly, but we just couldn't work it out. Jensen and Misha's expressions were EXACTLY the same. The genuine smiles and longs pauses were they just stared at eachother. I'm so happy that it was online cuz if they actually gave that looks to eachother standing right next to the other one I would've collapsed. Misha didn't know that jensen's album+ was out. And he got so embarrassed when he found it out. He didn't know that jensen was on set and hadn't been home for 8weeks. Jensen had no idea where misha was. And this means that they hadn't talked in a long long time.When you're that close with someone for more than a decade, i mean THAT close, even if u're separated from eachother you'd at least check on the once a week, or at least once in two weeks. But it was vividly clear that they hadn't. I hate how this world works. They would always be in my heart.+ I would be thankful from them for everything. It hurts, and it won't stop and im so sure I'd be carrying this pain for a long time. They mean too much to a lot of us. Sometimes I think to myself that god i love them so much. Remember in 2019 when we used to get SO many jenmishdee interactions? That was LIT. It was THEE year for us. I hope they're doing good. I really do. I hope we don't get more proofs and I won't have to update this thread. Cuz my heart won't be taking it very+ well.Something i gotta add U may say that Jensen's busy and that's why he doesn't comment. But he comments on a lot of jared and his new costar's posts. So that's no excuse. So yeah that's it. I don't know what am I supposed to think. english isn't my native language, so sorry for the mistakes

Here is my response:

I don't know who this person who has been talking to is but I have to say they seem to be project their previous relationship experience on cockles.

I believe Jensen and Misha are okay and are together. Social media likes and comments don't mean anything. I mean it's not like Jensen or Misha used to comment on each other's posts before. Jensen didn't even wish Dee Happy Mother's Day this year, does that mean they are not together anymore? Nope. He has other best friends he has known for over 20 years like Jason Manns, Steve Carlson etc that he doesn't wish happy birthday, does that mean they are not friends anymore.

Please let's not put value on social media likes. I don't even follow my own family on sm and I don't always like or comment on my bf's or bff's posts on sm. So it doesn't mean anything.

As for the Gish Panel, I have talked about it before, the time Jensen was slotted to attend the panel, he was meant to answer fan questions. I honestly believe they decided to not do it at that time because they knew the questions would be about Destiel and not their new projects. If you watched that panel, Misha knew that Jensen's album was out as I pointed out. He was just trying to promote the album and soldier boy. He knew Jensen had also buffed out. It was all to promote Jensen. Anything else you hear is trolls and antis just being loud. Also don't forget Jensen called him "babe".

If Jensen and Misha weren't okay, he wouldn't have attended or participated all those panels Misha organized especially for Gish. Danneel also posts a lot about RA and likes Misha's posts. I am 100% Misha visited the Ackles when he went to Colorado last month.

Stop listening to trolls and/or antis or just people who are projecting and look at facts.

[sugar-petals]

Baekhyun Doms You: Ending Up Laughing

↳⎡NOTE.⎦thought this’d be an interesting concept & a different side to smut: what if you try things out and it’s both not your thing? w/ a humorous twist and subby bf moments sprinkled in 😄

♡  words. 4k

+ tags ⚠️ pwp hc, bondage, throatfucking, graphic, cum play, unsafe/clumsy practice: do not recreate, degradation, biting, masochist bbh, domme!reader switches unsuccessfully, whips, hair-pulling

imagine that. a wide-eyed baekhyun pacing and tiptoeing in front of your toy shelf, trying to pick a riding crop he fancies. it takes five minutes and several ‘uhh, ohh’ confused puppy noises until he’s able to decide which one he’s taking. 

...literally even if he knows exactly which one does what. you’ve used all of them on him. 

meanwhile, you take three seconds flat to pull out one that fits your mood and proceed to edge the living shit out of him. yes, without literal further ado. teasing his dick and marking his thighs and doing all kinds of delicious things. 

he’s still going back and forth in his head without having even started out. cutely tapping and swaying from one foot to the other. 

it’s like he’s back to school. priceless.

what’s even more hilarious: baekhyun practices random mean facial expressions while trying to decide. he doesn’t seem to be sure what character he’s going for. it feels like he’s rehearsing for a concert or photoshoot, even. absolutely fascinating to watch. 

i mean he’s absolutely photogenic no doubt about that but

you’re sitting on the bed waiting naked like okay is this gonna be william shakespeare deluxe or what is kyoong channelling over there

“um... i think i got it! this one, okay? i’m ready!”

finally he walks over, strutting with his nose in the air and his eyes glaring, muscles tense, a mysterious bad boy charm about him, whip ready to sting, lips tight and punitive...

....and hits his pinky toe on the bed

oh the pain

great master baekhyun flops headfirst into the sheets processing the existential cruelty of bedpost pinewood and needs head pats to recover

lots of head pats

at least twenty of them

so many head pats

more time passes until kyoong is back in character i guess

you probably could have listened to exo’s whole discography in the meantime

and knitted a rug for taemin’s new flat

anyway

baekhyun tries to act very confidently finally getting into it 

adopting a sharp ‘hmph’ kind of tone 

endlessly teasing your back and thighs with the riding crop

so far so good sir pinky toe

but he just goes on and on

you could actually crochet a pair of socks for chen’s daughter now that you think about it

it’s you who has to tell him to get to the point and it’s clear he’s more nervous than he pretends to show

to be fair he’s not the only one

you try to get yourself mentally ready but you find yourself giving him actual orders and even correcting his stance five times cuz he’s so wobbly on the mattress like a pupper indeed

baekhyun mumbles to himself and has a hard time fully implementing the advice on posture but tries to aim well regardless. it seems to work at first

but tragically

he ends up with a miss, hitting his own thigh rather than your ass and moans out loud

now you’re the one confused because you were waiting for the whip to come down

but nope it went elsewhere did it

you wonder how he managed to do all that furious fencing in the obsession mv with an aim like that

looks like he’s so submissive, he straight up whips himself

taking matters into his own hands is he. subs these days.

baekhyun keeps on being wobbly on the bed and looks like he ran a marathon already

may i remind you that this guy does 3-hour long concerts and can practice throughout an entire night

... you both agree to immediately scratch that completely after his next flailing strike sends the riding crop flying into his unsuspecting, non-consenting plushie collection

animal cruelty

moving on

you figure that a change of location might be a good idea

baekhyun sits you down on a chair and bashfully stores away the yeeted whip

he vows to never use a riding crop again already and his teddy bears are thankful for it

now the whole plushie village and whole china knows how you don’t do it

next up is rope

what could possibly go wrong

he practiced wrist bondage on his own ankles for five days straight, you really prepared a lot of things to test out together today 

and he’s seen you tie him up over and over and over

but whatever it is that he manages to install on your arms 

looks like a piece of very experimental modern art that just sold for half a million at sotheby’s

what’s supposed to be a column tie is nothing but a mere... ball

chaotic like baekhyun’s personality. not surprising at all

wait that rhymed

anyhow

even alexander the great couldn’t have cut this gordian knot of a tangly masterpiece

ironically: while baekhyun’s roughly grabbing your chin for an intense kiss... the rope casually falls apart harder than the soviet union in 1991 my loves, you ain’t ready

baekhyun takes ages to notice while he’s teasing and kissing you and ends up sweating bullets when he realizes that the sublime art fell to pieces.

sorry comrade 

the fantasy knots and artistic freedom increases even more when it comes to putting a collar and leash on you

and his guy is supposed to be a dog owner? mongryong, instruct your man

baekhyun is a flustered mess trying to fasten it on you even if he tries very hard to be concentrated

maybe it’s because you’re watching him with literal hawk eyes checking every move (...hoping he learned something from you oh my). you’re not really melting into your role either, huh. the only thing melting is your pussy because baekhyun is acting so embarrassed which is the actual turn-on

if that doesn’t give you away

the leash comes off in two minutes time after baekhyun miraculously ties his own hands together with it

how the fuck did that happen

how do you even manage to do that

eager are we

after whipping his own thigh, self-domination 2.0 i guess

so whipping and bondage are off the programme 

this has been the most chaotic and hazardous attempt at topping in the history of sm entertainment

and they’re literally called s and m

...humiliation is next

when you planned your session you both figured hey he’s tested and tried by exo’s lively debate culture and he might be able to pull that off

and there are no props involved so he’ll have an easy time right

life is an illusion

you find out he can’t pronounce degrading names clearly because he keeps on stuttering them. which in return makes baekhyun crack up. 

carrying on the joke, you correct him every time. 

“i want you to repeat after me: stupid, slutty, bitch.”

it ends up as you doing what you always do 

teaching and training him while baekhyun either shyly or brattily obliges. you don’t even notice how you’re doing it but from the outside, it’s blatantly obvious.

because your brain is still feeling in domme mode, you also find yourself saying the usual things to him without thinking, even when he grabs you and gives orders. “now bend over! i’m gonna fuck your brains out.” — “okay, cutie!” 

which causes baekhyun’s mean face to collapse and he snap out of his command tone immediately, snorting because it’s the last thing he expected

he tries to carry on by punishing you with an actual mouth gag and a harness he can hold onto while fucking you from behind, i mean your pussy is already wet why not

guess what’s gonna ensue

wearing a harness feels kind of strange and new so you wiggle back and forth and all over the place. like what is this, what’s happening. baekhyun’s dick is going into all kinds of directions my friends, the amusement park carousel surely inspired this fucking style right here. 

and wearing a gag — there’s a way different person who needs to have this in his chatty mouth. 

kai and kyungsoo’s dream would come true and yet you’re the one gagged 

something ain’t right

if you’re honest. you’re feeling so weird being on the other end of punishment tonight and not being able to give him any directions. your dom brain is worrying he’s all left to his own devices trying to drive that confused dick home left and right and above and below and diagonal and crosswise. 

the fuck

your poor guts my god

what’s worse: his stamina is gonna sneak up behind him and tap on his shoulder like... bro that’s enough pounding for a whole month please spare these balls from deflating please do not break this device

to which your pussy agrees in unison

how are you gonna love your bub day in day out if you’re that sore

there’s nothing more frustrating than being sore and horny with byun baekhyun at your disposal

or a knocked out boyfriend trying to generate at least a sprinkle of semen after getting completely emptied in one go

probably sleeping for three days straight

alright so the harness and gag come off fast oh dear baekhyun clears those away in a heartbeat

that’s another point off the list 

the more you know

carousel cringe dicking down type of dominance... bizarre, disorderly, totally erratic, not on the agenda, worst rated on bing 

comrade baekhyun keeps on apologizing for making things so messy even if he tries and tries

you’re both so puzzled because you’re used to something so different and need a water chugging pause

baekhyun hasn’t sweated this hard since doing the MAMA choreography

and your pussy has never had to provide this much lubrication at once

where on earth is both of your usual stamina what happened

if a type of sex exhausts you fast and even baekhyun’s balls are suddenly moody you just know you’re wired in the opposite way

safe to say you’re better at giving and baekhyun is better at taking

leave the multidirectional powerfucking to kai or something

and being orderly to xiumin

another rug could have been knitted my friends 

moving on dot org

so, you both figure to take it easier and try to go with something he usually does in passing. you know, turning a typical baekhyun habit into something you can try out casually in bed so he can tease you.

that one should work out right?

proceed: teeth action. you seated, him positioning himself above you. after your approval baekhyun pulls your hair back to expose your neck — so he can deliciously bite into it (or so was the plan). 

reality: his hand gets tangled up completely. 

while he’s busy nibbling and giggling about like a lil’ bunny chomping at a carrot that turns out to be extremely ticklish herself. 

in fact, you start squeaking out a wonky high pitch, startling baekhyun’s fine musical ear to the bone by the obvious atonality. did she just try to outsing my vocal range with a creaking whistle note? 

mariah carey would cancel you on twitter over this one

that’s how you turn a vicious, possessive bite into an eternal meme

every time either of you go for a neck kiss, you end up imitating each other. baekhyun has immortalized himself as a nervous chomping bunny and you as the vocalist anti-christ

lord have mercy

you miss your old sex life already and it’s only been two hours

cause you see... if baekhyun gives you the chance to bite him? he needs a set of long sleeves, scarves, and an extra soft pillow to sit down on for the next two days

like, no mercy bitch

you get right down to business and ravage him and do it properly until he cums in his pants

sure, the way he uses his tongue now is definitely kinda hot mind you

baekhyun is always good with his singing equipment that doesn’t suddenly change aye

and you keep your eyes closed

but with time you notice that he starts drooling and whimpering. baekhyun’s wet mouth is out there betraying him, huh.

same with your body. your reactions give you away, body language just won’t lie. you have a damn hard time staying still. you wanna do something, you wanna touch and guide baekhyun all over.

and vice versa baekhyun keeps on glitching and doing the same thing he really became a living tumblr gif now

this whole session is just so confusing and laced with all these moments of awkwardness it’s really telling you something about yourself and mister pinky toe’s ideal dynamic

baekhyun can’t even get himself to even lightly slap you properly. and when he does, his delicate hands are just so cute. it’s as if legolas came along, scented in jasmine, elegant and fabulous like it’s a l’oreal commercial

he immediately looks concerned after he manages to do it cleanly and you admit it wasn’t really that exciting a feeling yourself. it felt more like, “um ouch, and?”

needless to say, you’re weirded out if anything, baekhyun smacking and dragging you around as a cold-as-ice dom is just a strange thing to do for both of you 

like even exo’s wolf era fashion was more coherent than this carrot fuckery

and those were some of the most intense turtlenecks ever 

is there really nothing dominant baekhyun can pull off. come on he’s the genius idol 

actually 

there’s something that does work out for once

because no rule without exceptions indeed

because hey, you can learn something anyway, it’s the whole point of you going through a list of things to try as a couple

baekhyun is good at doing the more hardcore, faster kind of fingering. who would have thought, totally surprising, revolutionary i know. but that’s where you’re both agreeing hey, there’s some untapped potential you can use for the steamier evenings you have going. 

cuz wow, he can get you off with flying colors. 

...only to succumb to a malfunctioning bobohu wrist 

even baekhyun’s boner for your legs in latex isn’t that stiff

it’s another pause until his hand loosens up again

this poor man just can’t win

and if you’re asking oi hard domming isn’t the only thing you can do

baekhyun trying to summon his inner soft dom: surprise, same old tale. here we go again.

your boyfriend thinks he generally looks way too puppy-like to be your big ole buff daddy taking care of you. oversized sweater, fluffy hair and all. 

you say to him well, it’s not that doms can’t wear casual things. but it’s true that you have to feel your role and find yourself believable. regardless of your looks, in fact. 

unless your partner really enjoys you dressing up as some kind of dominant hyper-archetype? looking the part is relatively unimportant if you’re absolutely made for dominance you say

pretty eye-opening moment for him

in your roleplay, he caresses and kisses you to the point, he can approach and lead you to do this or that position, don’t be mistaken. and he’s good at making presents, he’s indulging you perfectly well and actually likes doing it. but... it still ends up being more vanilla than not a few hours in. the d/s is out the door almost automatically the longer you do it.

at the end, it leaves you with a feeling of “but err, what now? give the maid outfit to charity?” 

baekhyun rubs his neck in search for something else to do, both of you staring at each other with expressions blanker than kyungsoo when a prancing chanyeol is acting up.

how did the quote go again. if you scramble for inspiration, let it be?

it’s exactly that situation when baekhyun soft doms. he can hold you tight and do his thing for a while, but the chemistry of your roles is dwindling into a question mark.

in fact. there’s an uneasy silence as if great mother suho was sitting right beside you critiquing baekhyun’s sugar daddy skills

baekhyun is rich like a motherfucker and can’t even call you ‘my innocent lil’ baby girl’ without looking like he just learned a first grade tonguetwister by heart

you did play your parts with less cracking up, but you clearly tell him that there’s still something strangely clueless and “ah, awkward” (baekhyun’s verdict in response, verbatim) in between the two of you. 

when you take care of baekhyun and tuck him in, you hardly run out of ideas. it just goes on and on. even when you played through an entire scene, you both come up with things to extend the scenario because it’s so much fun. you make him a hot chocolate, massage his feet, brush his hair, do some extra light bondage with a silk ribbon around his ankles to make him feel pretty, feed him pizza, have him cuddle up in your lap, pinch his ass, and do some rimming if he’s feeling a bit hornier. 

the spoiling is nice at the start, but there’s something missing. you want to lead his hands and really treat him, and do it all the time, and baekhyun really finds himself craving it as well. 

baekhyun soft domming quickly turns into — well just normal loving makeouts and gestures. you kiss and touch, there’s nothing hierarchical about it, nothing mega juicy or exciting.

you just don’t get into the groove, you know. there’s nothing particular happening if you try to get into those roles. it doesn’t titillate both of you for an extended period of time, it doesn’t make you curious for more. it’s like... shrug. what about it. 

when you usually dominate, you know something hits home when you think about it all day. baekhyun screaming and crying with his legs twitching pops up whenever you close your freaking eyes goddamn.

you make a note to observe whether you’re going about your daily business thinking about how you could be his innocent good girl. following his every whim, making big eyes at him or something. 

result: more shaky, ruined baekhyun moaning his soul out in the highest of notes and leaking cum everywhere from getting choked and his face sat on. 

daddy baekhyun has simply not crossed your mind. in fact, poor guy no chance to fit in there from the get-go. his particularly whorish, extra subby counterpart is all over your brain cells with his tongue out. and you’re very tempted to grab it between your thumb and index and spit in his mouth for some very good measure. maybe cum in it as well.

um. so there’s that. the more you know.

baekhyun figures as much himself and you try the other side of the equation. oh, oh. here comes hard dom baekhyun.

who gets you on your knees and starts a wild deepthroat session while calling you names. that’s all well and good... nope. your gag reflex decides to yeet some weird coughing facial expressions and reflex cock bites at poor baekhyun who doesn’t know what’s happening. to finish him off completely, you sneeze while having a hiccup and his dick slips out. 

... you both safeword at the same time.

that cleanup has scarred you both for life. what the everloving fuck. no more impulse throatfucking in this pure christian household, then. 

you’ll stick to lazy, twirling, indulgent blowjobs and the usual ruined orgasms for him — the actually planned ones, jesus christ.

like seriously. you invented a whole new language with those confused gargling noises and that wasn’t french, it was advanced level klingon. baekhyun repeats asking if you’re okay and you’re still stuck realizing oh hell, that was not pretty. off the bucket list, you like sucking him off but this style just doesn’t come natural to you. 

the popsicles you could train yourself with are usually gone from the freezer within a day after getting the groceries. baekhyun is wholeheartedly addicted to them. 

he loves cheating on his diet since you told him his fully cheeks are your emotional support squish and kiss pillows, so.

baekhyun rightfully insists he’s better at eating pussy the wild way in the first place — and that you have no business choking on his dick like you’re on hot ones eating the world’s spiciest whatever is trending now.

or actually... baekhyun’s dick can’t be compared to a chili pepper if we’re doing a choking analogy alright. that just doesn’t fit his promotion concept. cinnamon stick is more like it.

ever saw one of these terrible cinnamon spoon videos where reckless people try to defeat god by— anyway, you’ve seen them. that’s how you looked like trying to get your mouth fucked. i think god would actually be defeated by how far away from divine elegance that was and you’re so sorry for subjecting baekhyun to this artless display. 

cinnamon is still best used in small doses. say, for garnishing a creamy cake or pie y’know. 

anyway. you dished up the most butchered attempt at sexy gagging in history and so, baekhyun will preach for days how he’s the one chosen by fate to push down seven big fat inches of your strap still half asleep without even blinking. 

... and that his world-class operatic breath control would probably enable him to bury his face in your pussy on mount everest. baekhyun knows that every domme would sell her soul to get a sub as skilled with breathing as him.

...and that he has the official copyright for giving quality slobbery oral with quality smudged tears. as he will demonstrate to you almost daily from then on. king of messy head and going stupid with the tongue acrobatics. ugh, the noises are amazing, too. give him a grammy for his oral sounds.

gotta leave the heavy-duty work to the experts innit.

at dinner, he also poutingly brags how he can make his spit run out of his nose while he’s sucking himself through your entire dildo collection. and blow spit bubbles. and snort his own semen off his thighs and let it drop off his tongue if he’s in a particularly slutty mood. or a creampie. jeez, baekhyun, the wolf of wallstreet is strong in him. you literally have to stop him from showing off because “hey boy, i already know! i’ve seen it last week bro it was good!”

needless to say he’s talking in essays all day because he wants things go back to normal and he doesn’t have to ask twice.

for real, your candy man with the cinnamon stick has been suffering from the love bites and has to retire his cock for two days from the bruising. 

mind you. the pain he can deal with. that ain’t the problem. by all means, man. he’s a fucking masochist. 

it’s actually more like... submissive you has deactivated his boner and he can’t help it. it’s not you that makes him limp, it’s more like, the klingon choking and the ton of mishaps that just don’t sit right. 

baekhyun feels bad about not doing well enough to make both of you have a good time as well which is lowkey heartbreaking. you have to cheer him up with ‘now repeat after me: stupid, slutty bitch’ jokes to make him chuckle at least a bit.

cuz you gotta understand, baekhyun is very ambitious to develop his talents in all areas of life. if there’s a skill he gets stuck with and he can’t work with his potential, that’s so unusual to him.

and you say man, imagine if you were some kind of uber-talented dom. that’d still not make me sneeze any less.

if you dominate him, it feels easy to do. nothing can really ruin the mood, not even when the lube runs out (baekhyun drools enough to make anything slippery okay). 

except maybe when xiumin rings on landline because he left his favorite fluffy sweater in the subway and needs to vent about it. my god that’s such a tear-jerking story i’m close to sobbing. this shit could kill literally any boner.

or when your hand cramps up after shoving your fingers down his throat and in his ass for like half an hour which should be ranked first as the saddest anime betrayal of all time but it’s justifiable and you had a lot of fun beforehand.

in other words. only the things outside of your control tend to mess with your femdom business. in and of itself, nothing can kill your vibe except a dying battery obviously. 

whereas you trying submission oddly spoils the atmosphere from the inside out and provides a free cringe compilation. like without even doing much, it happens automatically. 

baekhyun relishes in dramatically recounting how you both looked like true clowns attempting a rendition of overexpensive, extra tangly contemporary art bondage. hell, not even employed clowns, completely retired ones, struggling to regain their tightrope tricks from summer 1912 when harry houdini was still hot shit in town. 

you say oh god, that wasn’t even worth a retired clown’s skillset, clowns work damn hard man. you’d be hardpressed to find any circus artist capable of cracking a whip onto themselves baekhyun-style and moaning out loud because it was this good. seriously. that was one for the books.

if baekhyun tried to set foot in some willy-nilly maledom porn, he’d be capable of firing himself on the first day. 

at the end, you just have a good laugh, man. you agree — hey, this ain’t it, but it’s good to know at least. tried and tested, been there, done that. self-whipping and carrot-nibbling and blowjob hiccups.

if you’re both so hopeless and living up to the challenge managed to upset poor mariah carey instead of giving you a hot and steamy time, you very well know where you belong. that’s a good feeling. assuring and a confidence boost for your skills. it makes up for all the clumsiness actually. 

exactly because the try-out part was an entire disaster, domming baekhyun will be even more fun, you can’t see it becoming anywhere near boring. it never really was, but now you know where your strong suits are even more so. and — what to avoid, anyway. 

no more unsafe practice and teddy whipping under this roof my friend

and something to incorporate more often which is baekhyun unleashing his very creative, pianoesque fingering skills on you.

you have lots of anecdotes to rile each other up as well. or, at least, tease another a bit. your high note was too legendary not to be remembered.

baekhyun will use all of these things against you in a positive way if you get what i mean. he’ll say how you being so strangely vocal made him realize just how commanding and compelling your sexy time voice is when you tell him how to kneel, how to kiss, how to revere.

and you teasing him how clumsy a dom he is makes baekhyun more self-assured in his subbing abilities. he knows for a fact you’ve not once roasted him about how well he can use his pretty mouth. cuz it’s the real deal. sloppy, skilled, and eager to please. he’s damn right about that.

hitting his toes has ruined baekhyun’s whole career as a dom and he was mad at first but he did realize that beside the clumsiness, subbing just suits him well as a principle

your experience gives you even more anticipation for all the sex you will have in the future. 

you already knew what you both liked. you know it even more now, it’s underlined, it’s a big relieved yes. no more cringey “daddy, daddy, choke me please!” worship. time to make his day and sit on baekhyun’s perfect face to fuck the shit out of it. 

or you know, actually land a whip on his juicy boyfriend thighs and listen to those heavenly loud reactions in a dead-on pitch (he usually moans in C minor).

long story short and cinnamon sticks aside. it’s even more fun now. you just love your cute subby boy just as he is. he doesn’t have to try to be anything else or step up his game. he’s so ideal just doing what he does like a real angel.

more subby stuff: m.list + ao3

↳⎡FINAL NOTE⎦i love writing crack lmao i hope you were rolling on the floor like i did 😂 write me your favorite part in the comments so we can laugh again and buy me a ko-fi if you wanna 👍

© 2017-2021 submissive-bangtan. all rights reserved. no reposts allowed.

[wiltingofthewhitelily]

Some CanUkr headcanons perhaps? :)

Sure thing! I just adore this pairing sm, definitely one of my OTPs.

Also, for this list I’m using their human names. Ukraine’s human name will be Yekaterina, or Katya for short :)

~~~

They had a crush on each other for a looooong time before they actually started dating. A very, very long time.

I feel like Alfred would honestly be the one to get these two together lmao. Like he'd just see them being so into each other and blushing like crazy around each other that he'd just be like "ok that's it" and either force Matt to ask her out or just go up and tell Katya himself that Matt is into her, probably embarrassing Matt to death in the process. It all works out in the end though :)

Also, ok, you can’t tell me the tension between Alfred, Ivan, and Natalya while Katya and Matt are dating would be high af (and lowkey hilarious).

Matt and Katya legit start acting like a married couple after only a few months of dating lmao. It's all cool tho, they're a cute married couple :)

Matthew is just absolutely smitten with Katya. He's seriously so in love with her it's not even funny. Like 99% of the time he's just like "my gf is such a perfect goddess like wtf what did I do to deserve her." Katya is super smitten with Matt too, obviously, but Matt just takes his love and devotion to the next level.

I feel like Matt likes to tell a lot of dad jokes/corny jokes bc c’mon, he just 100% seems like that type of dude lmao. In addition, I feel like Katya actually really like dad jokes/puns bc since English isn’t her first language she tends to find them funnier than most. Soooo yes, Matt finally has someone to tell his lame ass dad jokes too!! And she won’t groan at them like everyone else does and she’ll think they’re funny as hell too!!

Matthew def helps out Katya a lot with farming and stuff just to take the strain off of her.

He also gives her back rubs. Lots and lots of back rubs :)

They just enjoy the little things in their relationship—even just going to the grocery store together is an adventure for these two.

They’re a very physically affectionate couple. Whenever one of them needs a hug, a kiss, or a shoulder to cry on, the other one drops pretty much whatever they’re doing to comfort them.

~~~

Ok, that’s about it for now! Hope you guys enjoyed!

[coffeewithheroes]

Hiya, nice to meet you V! Do you know the Tiktok trend that goes like, “why can’t friends just kiss each other?” If you do, would you mind doing some headcanons about how Iwaizumi and other characters of your choosing would react? tysm!!💕

a/n: nice to meet you anon! i’ve seen that trend before and omg i love it so much! i just love the friends to lovers troupe in general :) never be able to get over it i swear🤧

really went all out on my first answered request, hehe!

-

“why can’t friends just kiss each other?” ⪼ haikyuu hcs

-

IWAIZUMI

💌 Iwaizumi would probably already know about the trend, seeing as he’s got tiktok obsessed oikawa as a best friend.

💌 oikawa would probs tease Iwa about how you might use it on him one day, which earns him a good wack.

💌 luv you tooru get well soon

💌 might secretly hope that you make a move on him, but doesn’t get his hopes too high. there’s a chance that you’re not even interested in Tiktok impossible, or you’d rather confess to him the traditional way, OR, you might not even like him. again, impossible

💌 lucky for him, you LIVE for trends like these :)

💌 you’ll probably be at his house or something, thanking the stars above that Iwaizumi has finally granted you a break from studying, as well as the opportunity to make your move!

💌 you pull out your phone, and search for the sound, heart beat so loud you hope he can’t hear.

💌 remember to breathe, baby. because it’s go time.

💌 you press play.

💌 at this point, Iwa looks up from his own device, and has that “wait, what?” look on his face.

💌 you’re laughing at him to hide the sudden waves of embarrassment.

💌 not to worry dear, your efforts were not in vain.

💌 Iwaizumi is honestly so frigging happy that you did this. he can’t help but think about how cute you are.

💌 “you’re so stupid, you know that?” and yet, the opposite comes out of his mouth.

💌 but again, must i remind you not to worry?

💌 the next few moments are absolute heaven - Iwaizumi pulls your face towards his, and kisses you hard.

💌 damn, he’s been waiting for this.

OSAMU

💌 this would be something neither of you are expecting-

💌 it’s actually atsumu who set up the entire thing lmaooo

💌 the three of you usually walk home together after volleyball practice, but atsumu had faked being sick and went home early, leaving just osamu and yourself.

💌 whilst walking, you get a message from atsumu, a video.

💌 and you play it out loud of course, not expecting it to be something like this:

💌 “why can’t friends just kiss each other?”

💌 cue the awkward stares and silent curses of atsumu‘s name.

💌 you want to think of something, anything to say that will get osamu’s mind away from the words he just heard.

💌 but unlucky for us, our brains always run out on us when we need ‘em most, right?

💌 in the end, it’s osamu who breaks the silence.

💌 “well, why can’t we?”

💌 “there’s no rule against it...”

💌 “should we...”

💌 “I’m okay with it if you are?”

💌 the kiss is one of those which start off as simple pecks, but get all crazy after that 😳

💌 you know you can’t get too carried away though, being in the middle of the street and all.

💌 osamu takes you to his house instead of dropping you home, and atsumu can’t help but smirk victoriously at the sight of your bruised lips.

💌 looks like you got a lil’ bit carried away after all

💌 instead of thanking his matchmaker brother, you opt for giving him the finger.

💌 osamu’s pretty content with that solution too, so it’s all good!

TSUKISHIMA

💌 your mind immediately wanders to Tsukishima the moment you discover this Tiktok sound.

💌 things will either go really well, or really bad. and of course, you’re hoping for the latter.

💌 tsukishima’s a smart dude, and will immediately notice something is up the moment you pull out your phone and start grinning ear to ear.

💌 “what are you doing?” he really doesn’t waste time.

💌 “hey, do a tiktok with me.”

💌 “absolutely not.”

💌 but he doesn’t stop you when you set up your camera and press the three second countdown.

💌 when the question pops up, tsukishima is lowkey shocked

💌 like, what did i just hear? 👁👄👁

💌 you’re laughing your ass off at his reaction, but tsukishima wouldn’t be tsukishima if he allowed others to openly laugh at him in his presence or at all for that matter

💌 he gives you one of those “shut up” kisses :)

💌 and suddenly, the tables have turned, and he’s the one who’s making fun of your reaction!

BOKUTO

💌 bokuto’s actually the one who introduces you to the trend

💌 the hilarious thing is, he didn’t even mean it as a confession, he just wanted to show you one video which he found particularly cute!

💌 he’s super excited about it, so while he’s taking a break during practice, he whips out his phone from his bag, and shows you the video.

💌 it gets your heart pumping QUICKLY fr-

💌 you’re not actually sure how to react tbh. you know that there’s a chance bokuto was just showing it to you because he thought it was cute, not because he was indirecting the fact that the two of you should actually kiss.

💌 but my guy akaashi has got your back :D

💌 “bokuto-san, does that mean you would like to kiss y/n as well, seeing as she’s your friend?”

💌 “...hey, hey, hey! dude, you’re right!”

💌 bokuto does not hesitate-

💌 pulls you towards him, then tilts his head just right so that he can kiss you.

💌 it’s over in an instant, there’s literally no time to react.

💌 he isn’t trying even a little bit to hide the smile on his face.

💌 “i’ll give you more later, i have to go back to practice now, yeah?”

HOSHIUMI

💌 another one who knows his way around Tiktok - chances are, he found the trend before you did.

💌 hoping that you’ll understand why he’s calling it his new favourite trend, and get the hint that likes you and wants you to confess that way!!

💌 spoiler alert: you’re going to do it.

💌 the whole thing goes down during one of your weekend sleepovers.

💌 it’s three am, both of you are dead tired, and you’ve decided that you want a kiss before you head to sleep.

💌 loud enough for him to hear, not loud enough for his parents to wake up, you play the sound.

💌 “what? you— y/n!!”

💌 this cutie can’t even form words, he’s that happy!

💌 does not waste any more time trying to speak - he’s sure that you’d rather be kissing him.

💌 and you would :)

💌 hoshiumi starts off by placing kisses all over your face and neck, purposely avoiding your lips.

💌 because that’s his final prize, of course!

💌 it feels like forever has passed, before your lips finally touch his.

💌 it’s amazing, it’s sweet, it’s heartwarming, it’s all the synonyms which you can possibly come up with for those three words.

💌 the two of you fall asleep, legs tangled and all.

💌 his parents most likely have at least heard of tiktok. don’t know the trend specifically, but know that their son has finally managed to get himself a beautiful girlfriend! ❤️

KUROO

💌 here we go,,

💌 this whole situation is like a total accident.

💌 you were just scrolling through your for you page like we all do, when you came across the original video.

💌 “why can’t friends just kiss?”

💌 kuroo’s head turns so fast when he hears it.

💌 hasn’t seen the trend himself, but thank you to the man who made it, you’ve given kuroo an opportunity to kiss his crush 🙏

💌 “you know, that man is talking sense.”

💌 he’s smirking, he’s wiggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner, and you’re trying to keep it together.

💌 don’t freak out, don’t freak out, don’t freak out

💌 “maybe we should kiss. like right now, and prove that friends are indeed allowed to kiss?”

💌 you’d like that, wouldn’t you? :))

💌 and so, when he leans in, you do absolutely nothing to stop him!

OIKAWA

💌 flipping heck, he’s so pretty

💌 soo...

💌 do 👏 this 👏 trend 👏 with 👏 him 👏 please 👏 and 👏 thank you............👏

💌 oikawa absolutely adores Tiktok, so you can bet your ass he knows about it.

💌 of course, doing something like this takes GUTS. confessing to anyone is a pretty difficult thing to do, especially with a good friend!

💌 you decide to confide in Iwaizumi in the matter, you know you can trust him not to say anything until after the big day.

💌 someone you can’t trust with a secret as big as this, is Matsukawa.

💌 accidentally overheard the convo between you and Iwaizumi, and thought it would be hilarious to accidentally spill the tea to his majesty.

💌 who is absolutely excited, by the way.

💌 when the big day arrives, you’re nervous as hell, and so is he.

💌 things go wrong, oh so wrong.

💌 oikawa’s sitting beside you on the couch. as soon as you take your eyes away from the tv and start paying attention to your phone, he starts watching.

💌 you don’t actually notice, too busy trying to calm yourself down.

💌 and then...

💌 before you even get to press play on the sound, oikawa is turning your head and pressing his lips against yours.

💌 it’s one of those simple, yet expertly executed kisses, the kind which makes you unable to open your eyes for a few seconds.

💌 “you uh...didn’t play the sound.”

💌 “you didn’t give me a chance to, idiot.”

💌 he’s just silly like that but i think i speak for everything when i say we wuv him sm 🥺

USHIJIMA

💌 Ushijima takes volleyball seriously, and he takes his studies seriously too.

💌 he’s been tutoring you for about one and a half hours now, and what the hell you’re so tired.

💌 but according to waka-baby, you haven’t done enough to deserve a break!

💌 (it’s true, you’ve only done about 3 questions since the topic is so boring lol)

💌 BUT THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT THE POINT!

💌 begging and grovelling doesn’t work on Ushijima. and that’s when you think - what about Tiktoks?

💌 specifically the trend which has friends becoming lovers through a kiss after a single question.

💌 when Ushijima goes up to the counter to ask for more coffee, you take out your phone and quickly search for the sound.

💌 he’s not impressed by your choice to do this, but he forgets about that once he hears those sweet, sweet words.

💌 stays silent at first, as if in deep thought.

💌 “if i agree to this, will you get some work done?”

💌 “how about you agree to this, because you like me?”

💌 you used confidence! it was super effective!

💌 ushijima allows you to kiss him, and to him, your smile is brighter than the freaking sun.

💌 “lets get back to work.”

💌 but you and him both know that neither of you will be able to concentrate now :)

ATSUMU

💌 osamu’s the one who shows you the Tiktok. passed it on through kita, who’s just knowledgeable about everything??

💌 but are you sure you want to do this?

💌 h e c k y e s ☐ f r i c k n o ☒

💌 just kidding!!

💌 after showing you the video, osamu, the better twin, enlightened you about the fact that atsumu was planning to do the trend on you!

💌 cute, awh 🥺

💌 unlucky for him, you beat him to it! sorry not sorry

💌 you make your move the day before he wanted to make his.

💌 you play the sound, lowkey excited to see atsumu’s look of surprise.

💌 but...there isn’t one?

💌 what’s? going?? on???

💌 “‘you got played baby girl. ‘samu showed you the trend on purpose, and lied about me wanting to do the trend. all so that you’d be the first to admit that you like me.”

💌 he’s a little kid stuck in a teenager’s body, please forgive him.

💌 gives you one kiss for the sake of the video, and about twenty for messing around with you :))

[fanficsfromyesteryear]

SICK & TIRED

A STRANGER THINGS ONE SHOT

— PAIRING: Billy Hargrove x Reader — WORD COUNT: 2,077 — WARNINGS: Cursing, Billy being...himself — REQUESTED BY: @udontneedtokno 

Um hi, can I request a billy x fem reader where she Is feeling a bit sick and crappy and he takes care of her? Also could you make it so they aren’t dating yet so he’s still a bit of a meanie and flirts pretty hard with her while he’s taking care of her? I love ur billy x readers sm🥺💖

— A/N: First of all, thank you so much?? Honestly, he’s my favorite character to write for. He’s so unapologetically rude and flirtatious, and I think it’s hilarious. Secondly, I’m sooooo sorry about how long this took!! Life got really busy for a while, so I didn’t have much time to sit down and write, but it’s slowed down again for the time being. Anyway, I can’t even tell you how excited I was when I saw your request! I’m such a sucker for sick reader/character storylines, probably because I relate to them so much. Any time my stomach hurts even slightly, you would think I’m dying with how much I milk it. I had lots of fun writing this, and I hope it was worth waiting for!!

Despite your best efforts to convince your mom to let you skip school, she wasn’t having it. For one, she thought you were just being overdramatic—so what if your nose was a little runny? She handed you a pack of Kleenex, forced cough syrup down your throat, and shoved you out the front door with a promise that you would be fine. You weren’t so sure, and your suspicions were only confirmed when you ran out of tissues by the end of first period, and instead of clearing your head, the medicine had only succeeded in making you drowsy. More than once, you felt yourself slipping away from reality—you weren’t quite falling asleep, but you could tell that you weren’t wholly present either. You wanted nothing more than to go home and take a nap, but your mom was at work, and you didn’t trust yourself to walk all that way on your own.

“Wow, Y/N, you look like shit.”

You were standing in the hallway, unsure of how you had come to be there—you must’ve zoned out again. With a blank stare, you turned to look at Billy Hargrove, who was leaning with his back to the locker beside yours. “Thank you,” you said, sniffing. You couldn’t breathe—it felt like you had a thick wad of cotton shoved inside each nostril. “I feel like shit, too.” As if on cue, you let out a sneeze.

Billy backed away, warily studying you. You had dark circles beneath your puffy eyes, and your nose was red and raw from being smothered with one too many tissues. You looked absolutely miserable, and even though a part of him wanted to stay as far away from you as possible—just in case whatever you had was contagious—he felt bad for you more than anything. He reached up to brush aside a stray piece of your hair. “Hey—” Billy was about to say more but stopped himself mid-sentence, his hand lingering on the side of your face as his eyebrows scrunched together. “You’re kinda hot,” he informed you.

Letting out a groan, you rolled your eyes and swatted his hand away. “Billy, I’m not in the mood for any of your—”

“No, seriously. I think you have a fever or something.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me,” you said simply. Turning, you started off down the hallway toward your next class. You’d gotten this far—you might as well stick it out until the end of the day. As much as you didn’t want to be there, you didn’t have much of a choice. You figured you might as well try to carry on like normal.

Billy thought otherwise. You hadn’t gotten far when you felt his hand wrap around your elbow. He pulled you backwards, and in your weakened state, you were in no shape to fight against him.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Billy demanded.

“To class,” you said, your voice muffled by your hand as you wiped your nose on the sleeve of your sweater.

Billy scoffed. “No, you’re not,” he said. “You’re sick.”

“Well, what am I supposed to do?” you whined. “My mom’s at work, and—”

“I’ll take you home,” Billy offered. “I need an excuse to get out of here anyway.” Before you could argue any further, Billy slung his arm around your shoulders and led the way outside.

As the two of you trekked across the parking lot to where his Camaro was parked on top of the hill, you were grateful for how close Billy was—you could lean on him for support whenever the need arose, which proved to be quite often.

Billy made sure to help you into the passenger seat—“Watch where you put your hands, Hargrove”—but as he was climbing into the car himself, he looked to you with an air of seriousness. “You better not puke in here,” he warned. “If you do, you’re cleaning it up.”

“I’m not gonna puke.” You hoped that was true because you knew Billy well enough by now to know that he wasn’t kidding, and you didn’t feel like scrubbing your own throw up out of his car’s upholstery.

As the Camaro pulled out onto the main road, you could feel your eyelids growing heavy. At some point, you must’ve drifted off because by the time Billy’s car came to a stop in front of your house, he glanced over to find you fast asleep. Billy yanked his keys out of the ignition and got out with a heavy sigh. As he bent down to scoop you up, he grumbled about how you were going to give him whatever the hell was plaguing you. He concluded with, “Be glad you’re cute,” before kicking the car door shut and walking up the driveway.

Once inside, Billy dumped you onto the couch in the living room. He stepped back and stared at you for a moment with crossed arms as he tried to assess the situation. What had he gotten himself into? He didn’t know the first thing about taking care of sick people—he avoided sick people, mainly because he couldn’t be bothered with them, not to mention how gross they were. You were different, though, and Billy mentally kicked himself for feeling that way. All this trouble just to get you to like him? It was a new low.

When you awoke, you were surprised to find yourself inside your house with a blanket thrown across you, alongside Billy, who was sitting on the other end of the couch with your feet in his lap. You couldn’t remember having walked in—maybe that cough medicine was still messing with your head—and you hadn’t expected Billy to stick around. You had assumed he’d drop you off and then be on his merry way. As far as you could tell, he wasn’t exactly a nurturer. At the very least, you doubted this was how he wanted to be spending his time away from school.

As soon as Billy felt you stirring, he glanced over tentatively and caught sight of you staring at him. He raised his eyebrows in question. “What?” he asked.

You shrugged. “I didn’t expect you to still be here,” you answered.

Billy looked almost offended at this. “And leave my favorite girl to die alone? I would never.”

A small laugh escaped your chapped lips. “I’m not dying,” you said, poking Billy’s knee with the toe of your sneaker. “At least, I won’t be once I take the right medicine.” You must’ve slept off the effects of the cough syrup your mom had given you—you were no longer insufferably tired, which was a plus, but the congestion in your head had culminated into a headache, and it had brought a side of chills with it. You swung your legs over the side of the couch and were about to get up when Billy stopped you.

“No,” Billy said, pushing you back down. “I’ll get it.”

You told Billy where the bathroom was and what to grab—“Aspirin’s fine”—then he disappeared down the hallway branching off of your living room. You were no expert on what the average time should’ve been for completing such a task, but after several minutes had passed and Billy still hadn’t returned, you started to wonder what was taking so long.

The answer to your silent question came in the form of Billy irritably yelling, “Y/N, why do you have so much shit in here?”

Grumbling, you rose from your spot on the couch and shuffled into the bathroom. “What do you mean?” you asked.

Billy turned to find you standing at his elbow, wrapped up in a blanket somewhat reminiscent of the way E.T. had been in the flying bike scene. Only your pouting face protruded from the folds of fabric. The blond couldn’t help cracking a smile at your appearance—comical, yet undeniably cute—and just like that, he had forgotten what it was that had caused your sudden presence.

You took no time jogging Billy’s memory. “It’s right there,” you said, your eyes resting on a bottle sitting on the bottom shelf of your medicine cabinet. A moment later, your hand poked through the blanket and seized the small container. You bumped Billy out of the way as you popped a pill into your mouth and stepped in front of the sink to pour yourself a glass of water. By the time you’d swallowed, he was gone.

“Billy?” you called, stepping out of the bathroom.

Billy’s voice came from somewhere down the hall, saying, “Holy shit, Y/N, is this your room?”

You appeared behind Billy in an instant, latching onto his arm and giving it a tug. “Oh, my God,” you said, your face burning. “Don’t go in there. It’s a mess!”

Being the sort of person that likes to do the exact opposite of what he’s told, Billy easily pulled free from your grasp and wandered inside. He was like a kid in a candy shop as he admired the things lining your shelves—trinkets, books, records, and the like—with wide eyes. Bedrooms tell a lot about the person to whom they belong, and boy, was Billy learning about you.

“And, who is this?” Billy asked with a devious smile as he picked up the faded brown teddy bear that had been lodged between the pillows on your bed.

Groaning, you buried your face in your hands, the soft fabric of the blanket covering your eyes. You wished the floor would open up and swallow you whole. If you had known that Billy Hargrove, of all people, was going to be in your room later, you would’ve made an effort that morning to clean up a bit—at the very least, you would’ve hidden anything embarrassing.

You risked a peek up at Billy, but he wasn’t where you’d last seen him. Instead, he’d moved over to your dresser and was rummaging through its drawers. How typical, you thought with a roll of your eyes. I look away for one second, and already, he’s trying to find my underwear.

Billy achieved his goal, too—you could tell by the cheeky grin on his face. His gaze cut over to you, then back down to the contents of the drawer in front of him, nodding thoughtfully all the while. He was about to pull something out, but you intervened—extending an arm, you slammed the wooden compartment shut, and if Billy hadn’t been so quick to pull his hands out of the way, he would’ve gotten his fingers smashed.

“That’s enough of that,” you said, grabbing Billy’s hand and dragging him back into the living room.

“You’re no fun,” Billy complained.

Both of you returned to your spots on the couch in moody silence. You tried to cross your arms, but you stopped abruptly when you realized that your fingers were still entwined with Billy’s. Blushing, you glanced down at your hands, then up at him, however, he didn’t seem to be paying you any mind. He was facing the wall directly opposite the couch with his eyes closed.

“What are you doing?” you asked.

Billy raised an eyebrow in acknowledgment. “Trying to picture you in that underwear,” he stated simply, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly.

You snatched your hand away to shove him with it. “You’re the worst, Billy Hargrove,” you said, but you couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped your mouth afterward.

“Damn it, Y/N,” Billy said. “I can’t concentrate with you giggling like that.”

“Good!” you remarked, nose held in the air as you squinted tauntingly at Billy.

Despite the two of you constantly teasing each other, you actually felt substantially better by the time Billy left your house that afternoon to pick Max up from school. He may not have been a doctor in the making, but where he lacked in nurturing qualities, he made up for with playful flirting and good company, and as they say, laughter’s the best medicine. You thought your troubles were over until you woke up the next morning to the sound of your phone ringing.

“Hello?”

You were answered with a sneeze from the other end of the line, followed by a hoarse voice saying, “This is your fault.”

“Aw, Billy, are you sick?” you asked, feigning surprise as you bit back a chuckle.

“Yeah, I’m sick,” Billy whined. “Get over here and fix it.”

“What’s the magic word?”

Another sneeze, then, “Now.”

And your mom thought you were dramatic when you were sick. As if.

[jasperwhitcock]

the rules: tag five or more people that you are thankful for in your 2020, that you're thankful exists in a world that's hard to live in. whether that be through random reblogs on your posts, or people you have had full blown conversations with. whether it's just seeing them in your dash, or interacting with them.

here to be gross again & catch up on another tag game *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

tagged by the angel that is kate @leahclearwaterdefensesquad

i love talking to u all everyday hehehe y’all saved my 2020

@inthemiddleofmymidnight i love u sm kimmie. my first friend on here. 🥺 i am giggling thinking of how shy we were... can u believe we’ve been bffs for like ten months... how is that possible?? i’ve literally already poured my heart out to u like 5 times this month so imma just keep it as ilysm. u literally bring me joy

@bellaskhakis neighana 🐎 ilysm!! i love having u in my life. it’s like we’ve been friends forever. i’m lucky to have u to always keep me humble 😩 hehe i’m kidding but also to give me advice or just to listen or be there. ur wonderful & i can’t imagine this year without u

@the-golden-onion mads... ew i’m laughing at myself... the way literally every speech i’m making sounds like the most basic speech made at a wedding... i’m being SINCERE here it’s not my fault i love all of u 😭 ok but mads i ADORE u. u keep saying how we’re a light in ur life but ur for real a light in our lives. i love having someone i have so much in common w that i can freak out abt acnh or pll or harry potter or twilight or mythical creatures or cute animals or writing fanfics or WHATEVER. my life is sooo much better w u in it. i’m obsessed w u

@howlonghaveyoubeenseventeen emma EWWW not me TEARING up ew make it STOP! emma thank u sm for the absolutely like relentless positivity and love and support u give all of us. the way u choose kindness and optimism is literally inspiring. ur the most caring, sincere, sweetest person in the world & all of our lives are severely improved having u around. ur like our sister

@bellasredchevy kae i admire u SO much. i eat up anything u post or anything u say... ik i’ve said it before and i think it sounds like mega cheesy but i think u just carry urself w such grace & wisdom (im embarrassed to say this when like our relationship is founded on a mutual love of TWILIGHT like tf sdhfdjfhfj) but i rlly just think ur so smart and compassionate and so u have the BEST takes & it really reflects on how u view the world and i just appreciate the expectations u have for how people treat each other (again this sounds SOO weird LMAO) i love u ur literally a part of the reason i joined the renaissance

@teamjacobthot dij i love the energy u bring into my life. ur always honest and blunt and hilarious and understanding and i feel like u just see things for what they are which is refreshing considering i’m someone who overcomplicates things. ur so beautiful & talented & just the coolest. i just thought abt u saying “is this let it go” like 2 minutes into frozen and i’m dead 😭 ilysm and also keep forgetting to tell u but jesy leaving has plunged me right back into another little mix lewis and i am sooooo sad

@cullen-collective ok i just had a moment of panic bc thinking abt u singing reminded me that the ratatouille musical is STREAMING RN LIVE AND I FORGOT but anyways. kaity i keep saying it but ur voice has BLESSED our lives. grateful for all the beautiful singing snaps & also the snaps where ur just telling stories bc i love listening to u talk hehehe. ur the sweetest and so funny & i love ur passion

@paulxlahotee i LOOOOVE u i’m so obsessed w ur TALENT & i admire u soooo much. ur literal JOY and i am so happy that the four l*ko did not make u d word... at least i hope so... has anybody heard from michele today??? she still w us? 😩 ur beautiful and hilarious i’m so lucky to know u!!!

@kaquiche taryn ILYSM ur literally the first person i remember interacting w my blog... it’s been u & me from the beginning baby 😩 u make me laugh so much and i love that ur always down to clown. ur just so supportive and silly and cute and i love u ok all of my messages are sounding like i am dr*nk i just love y’all ok leave me alone. also i didn't even see ur message abt zoom last night and now i feel sad that we all abandoned u. i spent my near year w u in spirit

@phil-dwyer-stan-account addison my dream in life is literally to hang out w u and go to the hello kitty cafe and disneyland and to skip in a big field of wildflowers in cute dresses. i love u!!! ur a cute sweet hardworking angel who deserves soooo much!!

@volturialice g once again... i am truly ur FAN i’m a volturialice STAN. ur one of my absolute FAVE blogs. i think ur genius & feel ~honored~ to be friends hehehe

@anagonyeet / @sethrights ama i love u so much i’m truly so grateful we became friends!! i’m so happy we’ve kept contact bc ur the sweetest, most supportive, and caring friend. i can’t believe u show up to support all my endeavors sdfhdghjkf. my fave follower on my animal crossing ig account hehehe

@leahclearwaterdefensesquad kate thank u for the tag!! ur so wonderful & i so appreciate all the leah content & that u think of me so often for tag games!! ily

and a thank u & i love u to all the blogs that are sweet friends of mine or post content i love & admire – @kellythepitiablefangirl (ur so talented... i adore ur art) @iknowyouloveme-thanks (u consistently make me laugh w ur posts) @renegadepack (thank u for the wolf pack content & also ur resource post... i’ve linked it a million times) @edwardsvirginity (another blog that made me join the renaissance bc i loved their posts) @edytheelizabethcullen (the SWEETEST angel ilysm) @rosaalee (ur moodboards are everything) @bellas-dumptruck-ass (funny & lovely & the best url) @emmettmc-heart-y (the KINDEST soul) @carllisle (happy every time i see ur url in my noties) @notquitetwilight (current god of the renaissance) @panlight (the funniest... thankful for keeping up w the cullens every day) @cockmcstuffins (the most iconic) @influenzabella (an absolute cutie) @witchyangela (elle is also an angel who provides the wolfpack content that we need) @angelasglasses (a sweetheart)

& all my moots!! i wish u all the happiest 2021 ♡♡♡

[unloved-cadillac]

Firstly to start off with, ummm a white kurtan, yes please, I know this bitch looks good whatever hes wearing, so it dont matter, BUT THE BLACK TANK TOP OOFFFF YOU BETTER STOP, ITS NOT GOOD FOR MY HEALTH. But moving on, I've finished reading the whole thing now, and I'm writing this in notes, so if you're getting thing like 40 minutes later it's because I'm drafting my ask. Basically I'm just gonna skim read it again and just give you my thoughts and any feedback, if that's okay with you, you can ignore this if you want to, I completely understand. I dont mind at all 😊😊

Ok to start off with, the exposition was really good, you've set the tone and introduced the Ackerman family really beautifully. When I read it initially the fact that Levi did not want a family or to get married was quite emphasised upon to me, and I'm really looking forward for the inevitable development and how his view changes as the chapters go on. I also love how you introduced Farlan and Isabel, and lightly touched upon how they met, you didnt go into too much detail and I really like that, it kept me focused on the actual story itself, which is about Levi and not Farlan. And Farlan wanting tto marry her 😢😢. I think it's really really sweet and I cant wait to see more of them. I love it so much.

The transition from setting the scene to their father being poisoned was not something I was expecting and made me go oh shit he dead. Part of me felt like it was moving too quick, but the other part of me loved the shock factor of it since it happened so suddenly. I didnt think of it as too big of an issue though, it was still enjoyable to read.

The whole encounter with the peasant guy made me wonder just how many more people there are like him, that dislike the Ackermans and would try to kill them. And whether y/n would be one of them. Also I got a bit confused as to who was speaking whether it was Farlan or Levi, but I read the sentence again and it was fine, I understood, so maybe I was just being a dumb bitch.

Oooh a quick point Levi sympathising with the criminal was really touching and made me feel warm and gooey. It shows that hes not a dick and does actually care about his people. But it also shows he has clear boundaries and is really firm. He will make a great leader in the future.

YESSS BODYGUARD ERWINNN!!!!! I WAS LITERALLY TELLING MY FRIEND THE OTHER DAY, ERWIN AND LEVI BODYGUARD AU IS THE BESTT. YES SWEETIE UGH ITS FANTASTIC. IVE SAID THIS BEFORE BUT IM SAYING IT AGAIN I LOVE IT.

Carrying on, I love the whole Erwin/Levi/Farlan interaction, of course Erwin knows everything, why wouldnt he, hes a boss ass bitch. Also again, reaffirming that Levi does not want a wife, nOicE. Really builds up his future development.

The difference in Levi's and Farlan's reaction is comical. Ones there waving and smiling and the other ones there like fuck off leave me alone. ALSO WHOEVER SAID THEY'LL GIVE UP THEIR VIRGINTY SAME GURLL SAMEEE, I WOULD TOO YOURE NOT ALONE. AND YES FARLAN IT IS FUNNY, IT MADE ME LAUGH.

Awww the people are so nice, offering things for free, that's how you know you're loved by your people, I rate it, rate Levi sm.

Okay my guy, imma need you stop for a second and relax. Taking your top of??? And your scarf??? Okay big man, I see you, I see you, looking fine af. Ahhh I love imagining this in my brain, so stimulating.

Anyways, Y/N'S HERE NOWWW YES BITCHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE, TURN IT UPPPP.

Nanaba being my sister is absolutely exquisite *chefs kiss*. I really thought you'd maybe put Petra, and then Petra would like Levi as well, but no its Nanaba and I fucking love her so so much. Also not really relevant, but I dont have any older sisters, but I do have older cousin sisters and I call my favourite one didi mooni (I think that's how you spell it, or muni idk) and yeah it just reminded me of her. I haven't seen her in so so long because of the pandemic and I miss her :(

Ah. So. Y/N does hate the royals. I wanna know why?? Does she think they're overrated?? A bad experience maybe?? Everyone else seems to love them. I'll just have to wait and see I guess.

ALSO PLEASE TELL ME THE LITTLE KID WAS MIKASA!!! IM HOPING SO SO MUCH ITS MIKASA, IT PROBABLY ISNT BECAUSE SHES AN ACKERMAN HERSELF BUT I CAN STILL HOPE!!! SHES SO CUTEEE AND ADORABLE AWWWW WEVIIII 🥺🥺🥺

THEY SELL TEAAA AHHH ITS A LOVE STORY BOUND TO HAPPEN. AND HE HASNT TRIED THEM YETT!!!! YES OMGGG TEA DATES, THEY CAN BOTH SIT DOW AND SHE CAN INTRODUCE HIM TO NEW SHITT AHHHH MY HEARTTTT 🥰🥰🥰IM GETTING WAYYYY AHEAD OF MYSELF.I need to calm down.

The whole meeting with Levi and Y/N was so adorable. It felt really short and I want more, but its okayyy, hopefully there are more chapters. Them locking eyes, him following her to get the leaves, HIM HELPING HER PICK UP THE BLOODY LEAVES, THE HAIR PART REMINDS ME OF IN BOLLYWOOD MOVIES WHEN THE PROTAGS HAIR GETS STUCK IN THE GUYS WATCH OR THEIR DUPATTA OR SOMETHING. OMGG Y/N IS ONE LUCKY BITCH.

Also since you havent specified the race of y/n, just wanted to ask is she Indian?? Or it it unspecified?? You wrote that she blushed bright red and many dark skinned readers wont be able relate. So yeah I'm not too sure whether that was intentional or not, I'm sorry if I'm mistaken though. I mean no harm at all.

Farlan's relationship with Levi is just beautiful, like I know I'm using the word beautiful a lot, but their broship is immaculate. Something else that I love.

Both Levi and Y/N not wanting to get married is hilarious. I really like how you've characterised her, shes really fierce, independent and seems really kind and caring as well. I really like this Y/N, very family oriented.

If I was her dad I would've taken the money. 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️ Not complaining about it because my dad would've done the exact same thing, but if I was him I wouldve taken it. Sis is broke, sis needs all the money she can get.

Both parties questioning Levi and Y/N is hilarious, fucking Erwin, I love him so much I stg. I'd sacrifice my life for him. Hes best boy 😇😇

I feel like this is really really long already so I'll quickly sum everything up, if you got this far you deserve a clap on the back and a medal, because I've basically just waffled. I really really enjoyed this chapter, it was very good in terms of introductions and getting to know the characters, I loved the initial meeting between levi and y/n and it did make my heart flutter quite a bit so that's that. I dont have any complaints really, just small minor things I've mentioned before and that's it. I really look forward to the coming chapters!!! Thank you so so much for writing it. Please make sure you're taking regular breaks and keeping hydrated and healthy. Thanks sweetie xxx 🥰🥰🥰

I’ve read this WHOLE thing..twice. I can’t stop smiling omf you’re so sweet! But, yeah minor shit I didn’t mention and I left it up to reader. Like the skin tone, sheesh. I don’t want any problems with that, I just said red blush to signify embarrassment. Reader is reader no matter what.

Aren’t we all broke af? But I liked the idea of the father being humble about it. Lol. Idk.

I don’t want to get into too much detail because that will obviously ruin the story but I love your ideas. Tea dates?! How cute! Erwin is the best, of course. He knows ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and he’s the kind of person who would follow his princes no matter what. Till the end, you know?

As I said, highly inspired by Bollywood movies lol.

You took your time and wrote all of this and I’m so fucking happy that you did. I can’t wait for all of you to see the upcoming chapters. I hope that you’re staying happy and hydrated as well. Also, happy Shivratri! (If you celebrate for it) and to everyone else celebrating.

-Caddy.

[ithinkthereforiamfandom]

Sicfic for you Dear one!

For Kelly. @anotherwellkeptsecret Here’s a little something for you Dear one, hope you like it.

@underestimatemethatwillbefun, @pri1982, @morgendaemmerung89, @riorothbates. Thanks for the reblogs 😁

“Sherlock I need to go to the hospital, just for a few days. It’s probably nothing to worry about.” John sounded calm and soothing so something was definitely wrong. Sherlock felt his chest flash hot with panic, he had noticed John take Rosie downstairs but it was date night so that was normal! But John in hospital was not normal...

“So it’s Not just a bit of a stomach thing, the pain you’ve been trying to hide and your extended bathroom visits.” John waited patiently while the wheels turned in Sherlock’s mind because they didn’t just turn, they spun and oscillated into every conceivable pattern. “It’s a bowel obstruction But it might be a growth, potentially malignant. So you’ll book yourself in until they know which and it’s resolved"

Sherlock finished speaking and sagged against John’s sturdy frame. John had held his partner while he spoke, that beautiful voice rendered lifeless by stress and worry. “Yes, it’s more than likely just an obstruction and I’ll be home in a few days.” Sherlock’s response was to pull John to the couch and wrap his partner up, in arms that clung too tightly and legs he couldn’t quite feel.

“Lock, Lock. I’ll be fine. Okay?” John held on and wondered if Sherlock realised he was shaking, the pace maker kicked a bit but it reminded Sherlock to be careful so he slowly calmed himself. “John, what do we tell Rosie?” “The truth, her Daddy is a bit sick so he’ll be at the hospital for a few days and she is to be good for you and Mrs Hudson"

Sherlock nodded into John’s silvered hair, just a few days… He'll be good too, for John. Date night became an evening on the couch with a take-aways until they collected a sleepy Rosie from Mrs Hudson… John had briefed Mrs Hudson on his probable condition and she’d agreed to keep an eye on 221B for a while.

…

Check in had been tedious, the tests had been boring, and the results had been predictable… He was turning into Sherlock! John sat in bed and breathed around his nasogastric tube, the thing really annoyed him so he pretended to sleep most of the day to avoid upsetting the nurses with his foul mood. Sherlock and Rosie had been in during the afternoon visiting hours and John had nearly died of embarrassment as Sherlock had apparently expanded on their careful explanation of that morning with his usual exhausting attention to details.

His daughter had learned the words: colon, rectum, and faeces. The nurses were Endlessly amused by the solemn “Daddy can’t poop, his faeces are stuck" and Sherlock had been defiantly ignorant of the word Inappropriate but shockingly aware of John’s supposedly insufficient amount of blankets, John’s criminally non-fluffed pillows, what type of steroids did they have him on, what dosage? Did he have the button for his pain meds…

It went on through visiting hours and eventually John took pity on the beleaguered nurses, kissed his daughter and sent them home. A quick sms gently scolded Sherlock and instructed him to send the nurses flowers as an apology. John was careful about tell him off as he knew it was just anxiety and Sherlock’s general need to look after him.

…

Sherlock was running a search from the cab so by the time they got to Baker street he had a long list of foods that Might be indicated in causing John's bowl obstruction but the information was mostly simple generalised tips to avoid too much fibre and suggestions for eating habits like chewing! Still if it might be hazardous it had to go so once Rosie was asleep he went though the kitchen and was stunned by the amount of potentially dangerous food! Like celery, which John ate as a snack and they even fed to Rosie, all of the hazardous goods were bagged for disposal. Mrs Hudson's kitchen was next and her food stocks were even worse but she had found him at it when he dropped some boxes of high fibre cereals and even her herbal soothers didn’t save him from being told off.

He was setting up meal plans, having constructed a few diet options, when he noticed the sky had lightened and Rosie was calling for him. A lost nights worth of sleep was nothing if it spared John from this again. After a carefully made breakfast of porridge with mashed fruits Rosie went to day care for a few hours with instructions to chew her snacks thoroughly and Sherlock got on with his day trying to distract himself from the absence of John in the flat.

He had the morning visiting time with John to himself and they discussed his meal plans which John found touching but quietly hilarious. “You nutter, I love you. We'll restock when I get out and the nurses love their flowers by the way. Very appropriate, yellow roses, good choice.” Sherlock hadn’t told John that he had arranged for the florist to deliver a bouquet of the now John-approved roses every day for a week. He hoped the gift would endear John to them, though he seemed to do that quite well all by himself, the little flirt. “I’m glad you approve. I’ve left Rosie in day care to keep up her routines so you’ll see her this afternoon.”

“Speaking of her routines, I know she'll want to kip down in our bed with me gone, try not to let her do it too much. She needs to learn that she’s going to be okay sleeping alone.” Sherlock said nothing and just nodded quietly, they had already moved Rosie’s bedding downstairs to John’s side of the bed, agreeing to bunk down till John got home… He would have to remind her not to say anything though the Fond/Exasperated/Resigned smile on John’s face told him that his face had already betrayed him so he decided not to bother in the end. “I’m not spoiling her, I’m not… Well maybe just a little” “No shit Sherlock” John chuckled as pale cheeks reddened. They both knew he spoiled Rosie and they both knew that he always would.

“We’ve avoided the need for surgery so I’ll be home soon, I miss you too Sherlock.” Slow kisses ended their visit. Sherlock would bring Rosie around for the evening and once John’s bowel function returned he would have his partner back.

…

The few days John had been stuck in the hospital hadn’t been fun but he'd had worse. The staff from Sherlock’s pace maker escapade had all been in to visit and congratulated him on their getting together. Mike had stopped by and they had had a long conversation as John helped him mark a few assignments. “I can’t thank you enough Mike, the introduction, I think you saved us both" Mike’s jovial face had glowed at the praise but he grew pensive. “A few times I thought I’d killed you both, when he left and then he got shot… and Mary, I never knew what happened there, I mean I know she died… sorry John.” “It’s fine Mike, a lot happened with Mary and it was tough for a while but I’ve got Rosie, and I’ve got Sherlock, thank you… I should have stuck with your first recommendation. He’s perfect. He's mad of course and it’s perfect.” Mike was still smiling when they had packed up the papers. “Thanks for your help John. Home tonight then?”

…

John was glad to be home but after the third dinner of soup and bread Rosie was gripeing and John was a bit fed up, even his coffee had been packed up as Sherlock had read it caused inflammation. He booted a fussing Sherlock from the kitchen and set about roasting veggies and preparing a salad to go with the chicken he had admittedly picked up from a deli on his way home.

“I’m fine Love and I’ll stay fine. We don’t need to change absolutely everything.” “You were in hospital John, that’s not fine" John kissed pursed lips and grinned as Mrs Hudson arrived to collect Rosie. “Date night at last" Sherlock had pulled him onto the couch again. “Yes it is and I’m perfectly okay Lovely. I promise"

Sherlock wrapped John up again, in arms that clung too tightly and legs that now clung tightly too. John was well again but Sherlock had missed him for a week so he was not letting go this Watson until it was time to collect his other Watson and that was that.

[shownuslaugh]

An Introduction

Series: EVE au

Pairing: EVE/SJ

2019

Eve feels absolutely pathetic.

“This isn’t your fault at all.” SJ is quick to reassure the younger girl. “I should’ve seen this coming.”

“Yeah, but over a damn email?”

SJ shrugs. “That’s how the management side of this world works. Don’t sweat it, kid. I’ll have this solved soon.”

“I hope so.” The thought of actually having to leave her boyfriend because of her debut makes her sick to her stomach. “SJ... I don’t want to break up with him.”

“I know. Companies can be shitty but what Lee Sooman doesn’t know is I have a secret weapon.”

Eve looks confused. “What’s that?”

“The thing he’s most terrified of. Choi Siwon and Jung Yunho bombarding him at once.” She ruffles Eve’s hair playfully. “He’ll break in no time with them on his case.”

“How do you know Yunho?”

“By proxy. I know Kyuhyun and he’s marrying Vixen.”

“KYUHYUN IS MARRYING VIXEN?!”

SJ is quick to backtrack. “YOU DIDN’T HEAR SHIT, GOT IT?!” She clears her throat. “How was SNL? You were hilarious, as expected, but did you enjoy it?”

Eve gets a dreamy smile on her face. The whole thing had been like a scene right out of one of her fantasies. Everyone was welcoming, the jokes landed, and the crowd they filmed in front of gave her a standing ovation at the end. And she did it all on her own. Without her mother’s fame assisting her. People laughed because they thought she was funny rather than because they wanted to get in good with her family. That felt... it felt amazing. Beautiful. It was enough to have her crying on her mom’s shoulder from relief and a profound gratefulness.

“I loved it.”

Eve’s words are simple but SJ is a master of reading between the lines.

“I’m glad. Would you be interested in becoming part of the main cast?” SJ tilts her head to the side. “Not immediately. You tested well though and you’ve been trending on SNS ever since. I wouldn’t be surprised if the offer came.”

“Really?” Eve’s eyes grow wide. “That would be amazing!”

SJ nods once. “We’ll keep it in mind. Until then you’ve got a few variety appearances scheduled. Hello Counselor is first, then Knowing Brothers. Hodong owes me a couple favors-“

“Are you really going to be my manager AND the CEO at the same time?” Eve interrupts without a second thought. It’s something that’s been gnawing at her ever since she signed the contract with VIP Entertainment.

“Why wouldn’t I be? Eve- and don’t take this the wrong way, kid- you’re all I’ve got going on right now while I grow the company. I’d rather invest in you and your future at the moment. Make sure you’re taken care of.”

“Oh. Unnie... can I go now? Or do you need something else?”

SJ’s smile and the look in her eyes softens. “Keep it lowkey until I break SM, okay?”

Eve salutes her. “Aye, aye Ms. CEO.”

“Out of curiosity though... how did you two even meet?”

“Oh. That’s a little embarrassing.”

“More embarrassing than meeting him while you’ve got snot running down your face and puffy, red eyes from crying on his best friend’s shoulder because you got kicked out of your group?”

Eve nods emphatically. “A fan meet when they’d just debuted. Caught him staring at my tits and accidentally spilled watermelon juice in his lap.”

SJ chokes back laughter. “You win. Have fun on your date.”

She wiggles her eyebrows. “Will do.”

“Don’t get pregnant right after debut!”

“Unnie!” Eve rolls her eyes. “I’ve been poking holes in the condoms for a year now. If I’m not pregnant yet there’s a good chance I won’t be.”

“Oh. Shit. You’re right.” SJ waves her hand towards the door. “Go. See you tomorrow.”

“Good night!”

[o0o-chibaken-o0o]

heLLO there! So I have seen you do fic recs and I just wanted to know if you have any good recommendations for Veritaserum!Drarry?? Thank you sm and have a good summer!

heLLO anon once again I am a literal year late in answering- I hope you are still following me! Here are all the wonderful fics featuring veritaserum I could find in my bookmarks :)

Sex, Lies, and Veritaserum by lettered (18K)- This entire fic is one long conversation about sex.so idk if you had in mind very honest and extremely(!) kinky negotiations when you sent this ask, but for anyone in the mood to read something VERY sexy, there is quite possibly no other fic quite so dirty and heartwarming at the same time

Spoken Words, Broken Thoughts by alpha_exodus (4.5K)- Harry's already losing it, and the Veritaserum's loosened his tongue. It doesn't help that Malfoy is too attractive for his own good.lol I swear there will be some fics on this list that aren’t about revealing fantasies followed by amazing sex, but not yet! Also is there anything better than the idea of sexy auror draco malfoy interviewing bad boy harry potter???? NO, read this!!

Blue Sheets by @firethesound​ (4K)- It was just supposed to be a night out. Harry absolutely didn't plan on admitting his feelings for Malfoy.Okay, this fic!! Everyone should read it!! It’s so so so adorable, and has plenty of veritaserum-induced second-hand embarrassment, which, let’s be real, is what we are ALL here for. I’ve definitely read this one multiple times when I’m feeling sad, it’s so lovely!!

How to Handle an Enemy by who_la_hoop (7.5K)- Everyone knows that it's no fun playing truth or dare with a Slytherin. But add a little Veritaserum, a scheming duo of Slytherin girls and surprising things can be revealed. Particularly about the fine line between love and hate…This fic!!! Is one of my favorites of all time!!!! I still remember exactly where I was when I read it because I very much regretted choosing to do so in a public place hahaha. There is truth or dare! Wanking! Scheming Slytherins! Exhibitionism! And you absolutely must read the sequel as well, trust me!!! Both fics are just pure amazingness.

You and Me by @bixgirl1​ (30K)- When Harry sits down with Malfoy, he's really only looking for a reprieve from the constant stares and whispers. (Mostly.) What he gets instead are a series of strange events that lead to a friendship that is something else, questions that nobody knows how to answer, and the realisation that the person that Harry doesn't know how to hate, anymore, seems to be the person who knows exactly what he needs. A story in which everything is complicated. And yet, somehow, none of it is.Oooh how I love this this fic! Obviously all 30K of it does not revolve around Veritaserum, but the potion does play an important role and the whole piece is a beautiful reflection on trust and truth. Once again @bixgirl1 somehow managed to take a relatively simple trope and turn it into something utterly beautiful and moving (*cough* and super fucking sexy with RIMMING like daaaamn *cough*)

Rarely Pure and Never Simple by birdsofshore (28.5)- Harry never thought taking a job as Draco Malfoy's bodyguard was going to be easy. Add in a curse that makes Malfoy even more of an obnoxious git than usual, and Harry's got serious problems.This fic involves a truth-telling curse rather than veritaserum, but the appeal is still the same (if not greater because this way the truth-telling lasts much longer)!! I looove a bodyguard!harry fic, and Draco’s personality here is fabulous! Thrilling and funny and an all-around wonderful fic :)

Rather Than Love by birdsofshore (7.5K)- The first time we tried it, I gave him too much. The second time, I got the dosage right, but I was frustratingly unprepared for how it would affect me. This is the third time, and I have it all planned out. Everything is going to be perfect.Another wonderful birdsofshore fic, this one featuring fucking amazing dirty talk and all the best kinks and probably a bit of drool on the part of the reader ;). Definitely read the tags first to check for squicks, but if you don’t find any then you must proceed immediately to reading this fic and probably dying of all the sexiness!! It’ll be so worth it!!!!!

Veritaserum Truth or Dare by ElectricBlueLilies (2K)- The returning eighth years bond over a game of Truth or Dare.A lovely, pure eighth-year part games fic featuring veritaserum to spice things up a bit ;)

Say Anything by alovelycupoftea (6K)- When Draco loses his reserve and starts speaking his mind, Harry realises something is very wrong. I love this little fic! It’s another with a truth-telling cure rather than veritaserum, but the things Draco can’t stop himself from saying are just so blunt and hilarious and the fic was just such an enjoyable read!!

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Thank you so much!!!! AH!

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ithinkthereforiamfandom: Sicfic for you Dear one! For Kelly. @anotherwellkeptsecret Here’s a little...

Sicfic for you Dear one!

For Kelly. @anotherwellkeptsecret Here’s a little something for you Dear one, hope you like it.

@underestimatemethatwillbefun, @pri1982, @morgendaemmerung89, @riorothbates. Thanks for the reblogs 😁

“Sherlock I need to go to the hospital, just for a few days. It’s probably nothing to worry about.” John sounded calm and soothing so something was definitely wrong. Sherlock felt his chest flash hot with panic, he had noticed John take Rosie downstairs but it was date night so that was normal! But John in hospital was not normal…

“So it’s Not just a bit of a stomach thing, the pain you’ve been trying to hide and your extended bathroom visits.” John waited patiently while the wheels turned in Sherlock’s mind because they didn’t just turn, they spun and oscillated into every conceivable pattern. “It’s a bowel obstruction But it might be a growth, potentially malignant. So you’ll book yourself in until they know which and it’s resolved"

Sherlock finished speaking and sagged against John’s sturdy frame. John had held his partner while he spoke, that beautiful voice rendered lifeless by stress and worry. “Yes, it’s more than likely just an obstruction and I’ll be home in a few days.” Sherlock’s response was to pull John to the couch and wrap his partner up, in arms that clung too tightly and legs he couldn’t quite feel.

“Lock, Lock. I’ll be fine. Okay?” John held on and wondered if Sherlock realised he was shaking, the pace maker kicked a bit but it reminded Sherlock to be careful so he slowly calmed himself. “John, what do we tell Rosie?” “The truth, her Daddy is a bit sick so he’ll be at the hospital for a few days and she is to be good for you and Mrs Hudson"

Sherlock nodded into John’s silvered hair, just a few days… He’ll be good too, for John. Date night became an evening on the couch with a take-aways until they collected a sleepy Rosie from Mrs Hudson… John had briefed Mrs Hudson on his probable condition and she’d agreed to keep an eye on 221B for a while.

…

Check in had been tedious, the tests had been boring, and the results had been predictable… He was turning into Sherlock! John sat in bed and breathed around his nasogastric tube, the thing really annoyed him so he pretended to sleep most of the day to avoid upsetting the nurses with his foul mood. Sherlock and Rosie had been in during the afternoon visiting hours and John had nearly died of embarrassment as Sherlock had apparently expanded on their careful explanation of that morning with his usual exhausting attention to details.

His daughter had learned the words: colon, rectum, and faeces. The nurses were Endlessly amused by the solemn “Daddy can’t poop, his faeces are stuck" and Sherlock had been defiantly ignorant of the word Inappropriate but shockingly aware of John’s supposedly insufficient amount of blankets, John’s criminally non-fluffed pillows, what type of steroids did they have him on, what dosage? Did he have the button for his pain meds…

It went on through visiting hours and eventually John took pity on the beleaguered nurses, kissed his daughter and sent them home. A quick sms gently scolded Sherlock and instructed him to send the nurses flowers as an apology. John was careful about tell him off as he knew it was just anxiety and Sherlock’s general need to look after him.

…

Sherlock was running a search from the cab so by the time they got to Baker street he had a long list of foods that Might be indicated in causing John’s bowl obstruction but the information was mostly simple generalised tips to avoid too much fibre and suggestions for eating habits like chewing! Still if it might be hazardous it had to go so once Rosie was asleep he went though the kitchen and was stunned by the amount of potentially dangerous food! Like celery, which John ate as a snack and they even fed to Rosie, all of the hazardous goods were bagged for disposal. Mrs Hudson’s kitchen was next and her food stocks were even worse but she had found him at it when he dropped some boxes of high fibre cereals and even her herbal soothers didn’t save him from being told off.

He was setting up meal plans, having constructed a few diet options, when he noticed the sky had lightened and Rosie was calling for him. A lost nights worth of sleep was nothing if it spared John from this again. After a carefully made breakfast of porridge with mashed fruits Rosie went to day care for a few hours with instructions to chew her snacks thoroughly and Sherlock got on with his day trying to distract himself from the absence of John in the flat.

He had the morning visiting time with John to himself and they discussed his meal plans which John found touching but quietly hilarious. “You nutter, I love you. We’ll restock when I get out and the nurses love their flowers by the way. Very appropriate, yellow roses, good choice.” Sherlock hadn’t told John that he had arranged for the florist to deliver a bouquet of the now John-approved roses every day for a week. He hoped the gift would endear John to them, though he seemed to do that quite well all by himself, the little flirt. “I’m glad you approve. I’ve left Rosie in day care to keep up her routines so you’ll see her this afternoon.”

“Speaking of her routines, I know she’ll want to kip down in our bed with me gone, try not to let her do it too much. She needs to learn that she’s going to be okay sleeping alone.” Sherlock said nothing and just nodded quietly, they had already moved Rosie’s bedding downstairs to John’s side of the bed, agreeing to bunk down till John got home… He would have to remind her not to say anything though the Fond/Exasperated/Resigned smile on John’s face told him that his face had already betrayed him so he decided not to bother in the end. “I’m not spoiling her, I’m not… Well maybe just a little” “No shit Sherlock” John chuckled as pale cheeks reddened. They both knew he spoiled Rosie and they both knew that he always would.

“We’ve avoided the need for surgery so I’ll be home soon, I miss you too Sherlock.” Slow kisses ended their visit. Sherlock would bring Rosie around for the evening and once John’s bowel function returned he would have his partner back.

…

The few days John had been stuck in the hospital hadn’t been fun but he’d had worse. The staff from Sherlock’s pace maker escapade had all been in to visit and congratulated him on their getting together. Mike had stopped by and they had had a long conversation as John helped him mark a few assignments. “I can’t thank you enough Mike, the introduction, I think you saved us both" Mike’s jovial face had glowed at the praise but he grew pensive. “A few times I thought I’d killed you both, when he left and then he got shot… and Mary, I never knew what happened there, I mean I know she died… sorry John.” “It’s fine Mike, a lot happened with Mary and it was tough for a while but I’ve got Rosie, and I’ve got Sherlock, thank you… I should have stuck with your first recommendation. He’s perfect. He’s mad of course and it’s perfect.” Mike was still smiling when they had packed up the papers. “Thanks for your help John. Home tonight then?”

…

John was glad to be home but after the third dinner of soup and bread Rosie was gripeing and John was a bit fed up, even his coffee had been packed up as Sherlock had read it caused inflammation. He booted a fussing Sherlock from the kitchen and set about roasting veggies and preparing a salad to go with the chicken he had admittedly picked up from a deli on his way home.

“I’m fine Love and I’ll stay fine. We don’t need to change absolutely everything.” “You were in hospital John, that’s not fine" John kissed pursed lips and grinned as Mrs Hudson arrived to collect Rosie. “Date night at last" Sherlock had pulled him onto the couch again. “Yes it is and I’m perfectly okay Lovely. I promise"

Sherlock wrapped John up again, in arms that clung too tightly and legs that now clung tightly too. John was well again but Sherlock had missed him for a week so he was not letting go this Watson until it was time to collect his other Watson and that was that.