#ahhh this took me forever to make because i had to remember how to make gifs and my settings and everything akfdhjsl

[lesbianjamies]

You know, you're a really shitty liar.

[volensnolenss]

Birthday boy

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: Satoru can't wait for his birthday while you and your students are secretly preparing a surprise for him;

𝓒𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽: sfw! fluff

December 6th is a particularly anxious and joyful day for Satoru, because after it comes the number 7.

“Ahhh, why is it taking so long?” Gojo, sitting in his office, imagined different scenarios, how students and colleagues would congratulate him, but of course you are in the first place. He looked at his watch impatiently, disappointed every time he saw that only 1-2 minutes had passed and, unable to stand it, he went to you.

“It's better to hide these balloons here for now, but this...” you decisively guided each student, giving everyone instructions and actively participated in this grandiose event yourself.

“My lungs are already hurting inflating these balloons.” Nobara looked at them wearily, almost indignantly, “This is not the end, Kugisaki.” Itadori tried to cheer her up by tying ropes to them.

“Hey, let's switch places!”

“No!”

“Shut up, both of you.” And only Megumi, doing everything in silence, could not stand their heated fight.

A lot of questions poured into your address, from which you took a deep breath, “Okay, now we should decorate the cake with these candles- He's coming here. Hide. Quickly.”

Only you could feel his energy over long distances. It's a subtle feeling that runs through you, reminiscent of something bright and indescribable, unlike anything else.

You quickly sat down at your desk, taking out papers and pretending to fill them out; Nobara rushed into your closet, Yuji sat under your desk; Megumi, looking in all directions, stood behind the door, tightly pressed against the wall.

The door opened and Satoru came in, “Honey, what are you doing?” He was leaning against the doorjamb, looking at you and trying to find at least some clues in your facial expressions.

“I'm working.” You looked at him calmly and smiled a little.

“Where are the students?”

“They're sleeping, Satoru. I advise you to do the same.”

“And you want to leave me alone?”

He immediately wanted to approach you, making Megumi tense up, which is why he sent you rescue signals with pleading eyes, “I'll finish soon and I'll definitely come to you.” You stood up, almost hitting Itadori with your foot, and walked towards Gojo, hugging him with one arm and pushing him out of the office.

“Mmm, cool, baby, you're just the best! He spread his hands, surprised at your hardness and cunning, “I love you too!” You slammed the door and breathed a sigh of relief; you started working hard again when Satoru wandered back to his room.

He was muttering to himself out of curiosity, he wanted to know what would be on his birthday. And, entering his office, he sat down on his chair, looked at his watch and closed his eyes, giving himself up to sleep.

In a short time, you have done a lot of work, spending a lot of energy and nerves, taking into account all the preferences of Gojo: starting from the color of balloons, crackers and caps, ending with the cake.

While you were putting candles in, his students started to get interested in you and him.

“How long have you known him?” Nobara stood to your left, carefully looking at the movement of your fingers. “We studied together.” For a second, you remembered your youth; short but unfading memories appeared before your eyes, which remained with you forever.

“And what was he like in those times?” Itadori is sitting on your right,“ He hasn't changed much.”You grinned without going into details and continued to decorate it further.

“Is it true that you are a couple?”

“YUJI!” Megumi and Nobara shouted at him, but you just laughed, leaving him unanswered and signaled that there were only a few minutes left.

“Why not?!” He looked indignantly at his friends, following them and holding a firecracker tightly in his hands.

You were stealthily heading to his office, lighting up a dark corridor decorated with various trinkets, bright lights and everything to make cold December pleasant, because Gojo Satoru day is coming.

“Three, two, one!”

You went to see him, waking him up with loud congratulations and the sounds of firecrackers; from such suddenness, he did not immediately understand what was happening, but nevertheless the raised corners of his lip said otherwise.

“Happy birthday, sensei!”

Among them, he willingly tried to find you. Someone who can't be compared to any gift in this world. Among the falling confetti and sequins, several of which decorated your hairstyle, he went to meet you.

“It's your birthday. Make a wish, Satoru.”You lifted the cake, looking at his shining eyes full of delight, “I have nothing more to dream about, because I have you.”

Thinking for a split second, Gojo blew out the candles, which made everyone shout louder, congratulating him again.

“Do you want to try the cake?”

“No, that's not what I want.” And he pressed against your soft and inviting lips, leaving fervent traces of love on them.

[heavyhitterheaux]

Favorite Son-in-Law

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

Gif by @jackharlowgifs 💕

AN: First Lady's family absolutely adores her husband

Synopsis: First Lady's parents explain why Jack is their favorite son-in-law 🤭

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Requested by: a beautiful anon 💕

First Lady of Private Garden Masterlist Part 1

First Lady of Private Garden Masterlist Part 2

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

“Baby! You almost ready?” You heard Jack ask you from the bedroom as you were in the bathroom trying to finish curling your hair.

“Give me five more minutes!” 

Just then Jack came into the bathroom behind you and wrapped his arms around you and then leaned down to kiss you cheek which you gladly accepted.

“I’m not rushing you mamas, but you told me to give you five minutes twenty minutes ago. I could have been eating you out for all that.”

“Jackman! Behave!”

“I am behaving! We were supposed to meet up with everyone at 2 and it is now 3:15.”

“Pookie.” You said as you turned around to look at him since you had finally finished putting the last curl in your hair.

“Yes, princess?”

“How long have we been together?” You asked while placing your arms around his neck.

“Umm ten years.”

“And you know your wife is black, correct?”

“What? Where are you going with this?”

“Since when has my family EVER started anything on time? Trust and believe that my parents will be pulling up at the same time we do.”

“I-.....”

All you did was look at him and smirk as he was trying to come up with an answer for when your family had been on time for a function.

“Exactly. Now give me kisses so we can go.”

“Now, don’t start anything you can’t finish.”

“We’ll finish when we come back! Kisses please!”

Jack leaned down to place several kisses all over your face and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Now it’s time to go see my favorite in-laws.”

“Jack, baby, they’re your only in-laws.”

“They’re still my favorite.” Jack answered you while shrugging before leading you both out of the bathroom.

The two of you were now walking hand-in-hand in Cherokee Park to the spot where your parents told you everyone would be. You quickly spotted them along with your grandparents, Dani, Drama, all of Private Garden since your parents considered them their sons, and a lot of your aunts, uncles, and cousins.

“It’s about time you two got here!” 2fo said while walking up to the two of you while eating with his plate in his hand.

“You know what they were probably doing! We actually started at 2:45 this time!”

“Shut up Urban! Or should I say Big Whore!” You exclaimed and he made a face at you.

“Hey! Don’t act up in front of company!” He responded and all you and Jack did was shake your heads.

“The princess took an hour curling her hair.” Jack muttered and you pinched his side. 

“Jackman, don’t start.”

“It looks pretty on you though.” 

“Aww, why thank you, baby.” You said while reaching up to kiss him. 

“See? That’s the type of shit that made yall late in the first place.”

“AHHH! Is that my baby and my favorite son-in-law?” Your dad exclaimed while making his way over to the both of you. He quickly embraced you and then hugged Jack.

“HE’S YOUR ONLY SON-IN-LAW DAVID!” Your mother Ivy said and you couldn’t help but to laugh.

“Is that? Is that what I think it is?” He asked and motioned to the bottle of Hennessey in Jack’s hand.

“Of course, I know it’s your favorite.” He said while handing it over to him.

“Baby girl, keep him around FOREVER. Now I have to make sure your Aunt Cassie don’t see this. I know you two remember what happened last time.” He responded while eyeing the two of you. 

“Daddy, I am so done with you.” You said as you simply shook your head and all Jack was doing was laughing next to you.

“Y/N! Why you always keeping Jack from us?!” Your Aunt Keisha asked as she quickly walked up to hug you both.

“Because yall are embarrassing and I can only take yall in doses. 2FO! THAT BETTER NOT BE THE CHEESECAKE MY MOM MADE FOR ME!” 

“I SAW IT FIRST!”

“Not the white boy bringing the Hennessey to the black function.” Shloob said and immediately busted out laughing.

“I thought it was understood that he was just light skinned! He’s been around us since he was fourteen!”

“Wait, Jack’s white?” You heard your grandmother ask and you looked at her in disbelief.

“What the? Yes nana! My husband is white!” You said while laughing and shaking your head.

“Oh, I thought he was a rapper?”

“Jesus, have mercy. He is nana!”

“You know I heard that First Class song on the radio the other day. Maybe Jack can do a collaboration with him one day.”

“NANA, THAT IS JACK! THAT’S HIS SONG!”

“SINCE WHEN?!”

“I-... baby come on so we can get food because I CANNOT with them.” You said while grabbing his hand again and leading him towards the food.

The both of you made your way over to where your Uncle Julius was on the grill while you saw your Uncle Jason, the youngest of the triplets that your grandmother had making his way towards you.

“Oh shit.” Jack muttered because he immediately knew what was about to happen.

“Ignore him and maybe he’ll go away.”

“JACK! BABY GIRL! LONG TIME NO SEE.”

“Mm hmm.” Both of you said as your Uncle Julius simply handed the both of you plates and went back to flipping burgers.

“Aye! Let me hold something! I got yall the next time I see you! Oh wait, actually Jack lemme get them New Balances off your feet. Those the new 550’s ain’t they?”

“JASON! Get away from my babies and leave them alone! You always acting like a damn fool!” Your mom exclaimed while reprimanding her younger brother while you and Jack stifled a laugh.

“I just need twenty dollars! Oh better yet, Jack can I give you my mixtape? Been working on a few things.”

“Then get a job! And no he doesn’t want to hear your dried up crusty ass bars! You’re over 60! It’s time for jazz music now. The rap career as a goal ship has SAILED!”

“IVY, you always been a damn hater!”

The two of you piled your plates high before making your way over to your best friends and sitting down with them while your parents, sister, and Dani were at the opposite end. 

Urban was currently talking to your younger cousin Demi while 2fo had gotten his fourth plate, Quiiso was talking to your cousin Cierra and you’ve been trying to hook them up for the longest, and Shloob and Ace went to go play basketball with your old ass uncles and put money up to see who would win.

“Now, Demi, go to your grandma Kat and ask her for an eight and give her this entire thing. Don’t short change her now. I’ll give you ten dollars when you come back.”

“Okay, be right back.”

“URBAN!” You exclaimed while shaking your head in disbelief.

“What?!?! Your grandma got some of the best weed I ever smoked in Kentucky! I’m not messing up this business deal.”

“I… I gotta agree baby.” Jack said as he took your soda can from you and opened it and slid it back since he knew you would have trouble doing it with your long nails.

“Yall are a hot ass mess and fit right in with my family.”

“OH LOOK! IT’S MY FAVORITE WHITE BOYS, JACK AND URBAN!” Your Aunt Marisa said while coming over to the table and all you could do was laugh. 

At the other end of the table, your mom was watching the two of you with nothing but admiration in her eyes as the two of you were feeding each other and Urban was making gagging gestures before you threw a spare fork at him which hit him on the forehead. 

“At least one of our kids had a successful marriage.” Your mother said as she eyed Dani and Drama.

“Mom, seriously?” Dani asked as she took another bite of her food.

“Yeah seriously and look how well she turned out. All thanks to me and your dad. Because if it was left up to you, she’d probably be doped up somewhere.”

“Now Ivy…” Your dad David started to say but all she did was shrug.

“Don’t Ivy me. She’s successful because of what we instilled in her and I damn sure will never let you two take credit for it. We raised her, not you.”

“I-...” Drama started to say but was immediately cut off by Ivy.

“Now don’t either of you start with me. I said what I said and you two need to come clean to her because I can already sense that this is about to turn into a shit show. Been telling you two that for years and now the girl is 24.”

“We will when the time is right.” Drama said while looking at them.

“There isn’t ever a right time but she needs to hear the truth and hear it from the two of you. And you know what this means right?”

“What? What does it mean?” Dani curiously asked while glancing at you and seeing you laughing at something Jack whispered in your ear.

“I highly doubt that she’ll ever forgive you two for this.”

Marisa was telling you her latest products that she was selling and Jack was listening to her intently while you were intrigued.

She’s been selling sex toys and anything that has to do with sex for as long as you could remember. 

“So, it’s like the rose toy? Jack bought me that already.” You asked her and she shook her head no.

“No, it’s even better. Rose toy takes about what? Three to five minutes for you to hit your peak? I give this one two minutes and don’t let Jack be in you too, bitch you will see HEAVEN, okay?!”

“Now Aunt Marisa…” You said while trying not to laugh but Jack was all for it.

“How much?!” He eagerly asked and you looked at him like he was crazy.

“You’re my favorite nephew and niece so it’s on the house, just leave a good review for me. You two won’t be leaving the bed the entire night.”

“They don’t do that anyway.” Urban added as Demi came back up to him with his weed in her hand.

“Demi! My girl! Okay, here you go.” He said while handing her a ten dollar bill.

“Grandma Kat said the price went up but since you’re one of her favorite customers, she’ll keep the price the same.”

“Damn bestie, I love your family.”

“I do too even if they are a bit crazy.” You confessed. 

The day was winding down and the sun was starting to set since it was now around eight and your father had gathered everyone around as he was sipping from his Hennesy bottle.

“Now Jack is my favorite son-in-law ever and baby girl, you aren’t allowed to marry anyone else, okay? We just had to make sure that was clear.” Your dad said while throwing his arm around Jack and you knew he was tipsy.

“I just wanted you two to know how proud I am of the both of you and that I admire the way he takes care of you and you do the same exact thing for him. I never worried about you growing up, but that Danielle? Whew, story for another day. Anyway, Jack you better not hurt my youngest and baby girl you better not hurt Jack, understood? Because you damn sure not moving back in with me. Whatever goes down between the two of you, you better fix it! No take backs Jack! You snuck and married her so now you’re stuck with her!”

“What the? DADDY!”

“And since you two finally got caught! Been married since you were nineteen!” Your mom exclaimed while eyeing the two of you.

“But that was URBAN! His fault!”

“I didn’t say I do like the two of you!” Urban said while sipping on his beer. 

“Might as well had, since you are definitely a part of that relationship!”

“But on a serious note, we love the both of you so much and can’t wait to see the success that will come. The way you two love each other is evident in everything that you do and I know this marriage is meant to be.” Your mom said and the both of you went over to hug her.

“Appreciate you saying that, mom.” Jack said and all she did was nod and you knew for a fact that she was about to cry.

“Now… I want my grandbabies so get a move on!”

“I’m trying, but I swear your daughter is dodging me!”

“I am NOT!”

“Then let me get you pregnant!”

“Give me another year!”

“See what I mean?!” Jack said as he threw his hands up in disbelief and all you did was laugh.

Your Grandma Kat then came next to Urban and motioned for him to open his hand.

“Got another eight for you and don’t you go telling all my grandkids. I don’t like them the way I like you, Jack and baby girl. Tell them I’m out if they ask you.”

“If I was older we would have definitely been married. You stay looking out” Urban said while quickly slipping it in his pocket.

“If I was thirty years younger, I might just take you up on that. Just don’t let my husband hear you say that.”

“GRANDMA KAT! STOP TRYING TO SHOOT YOUR SHOT AT URBAN!” You yelled while looking over at them in disbelief.

“HE DID IT FIRST!” 

“I do like cougars though. No shame in it.” Urban said while shrugging.

“Like I said before, all of you fit right in with my crazy ass family.”

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[justhere4kpop]

Forever

Wooyoung x Single Mom! Reader

Your life gets flipped upside down when you take a new backup dancer job at KQ Entertainment, you lied in your interview how will you get out of this one?

Genre: Mostly Fluff, Some Angst.

Warnings: (?) Angst, Mentions of cheating, self-doubt, and arguing.

w/c: 8715

a/n: Ahhh the longest one I've written so far!!! Oh god, I really hope it's good and that you guys like it, I've never written anything this long and I'm so scared to post it hahaha. I feel like even as long as it is it might feel a little rushed. I have no idea....it took me a long time to write anyways so any and all feedback is welcomed. Okay AH! Enjoy, please!

tags: @cromernet @starillusion13, @jaehunnyy (for you Chippie)

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Do I wake up every morning with my hair in every direction, toothpaste foaming at the mouth, a stained t-shirt and pajama pants, and a toddler crying because I can’t hold her? Not every morning…sometimes I don’t get to brush my teeth before breakfast. Today was a really important day for me though and I absolutely could not bring my screaming toddler to my first day as a backup dancer at KQ Entertainment.

“What do you think Sweet Pea? Pancakes for breakfast?” I looked at her. “How about some fruit too? Grapes, Cantaloupe?” she smiled.

“Mama!” she pointed at the plate.

“I know I know they’re coming.” I flipped the stove on and kept brushing my hair. This is what I get for letting her try to braid it last night. “I knew I should’ve prepped last night.”

Of course, the day was going to be crazy, I’m a ball of anxiety there’s no way I couldn’t be.

“Do you like the melon today? It’s in season so it should be nice.”

“Juicy.” she smiled. “I like it!” she raised it in the air.

“I’m glad, maybe I’ll get more the next time we go to the grocery store.” I ate with her and wiped her mouth when it got to be too much.

“Are you excited to hang out with grandma today?” I picked up her plate so we could go wash dishes together.

“Grandma is coming?” she looked at me.

“Yes, are you excited?” I looked down at her and pulled her step stool up since she insists she can ash her own dishes.

“Mmmmm I dunno.” she shrugged and I chuckled.

The doorbell rang.

“Hi Mom, thanks for watching her again.” I sighed opening the door a two-year-old attached to my hip. “Saja, say hi to grandma.” I nudged her and she hid behind my shoulder. My shy little girl.

“Oh still shy as ever I see. Does she talk to anyone?” my mom chuckled.

“She’ll talk to me, especially when she gets upset…she’s just nervous around people. In fact, we were just talking about you coming over.”

“Oh, how fascinating.” she smiled.

“Okay let me just show you around really quickly to make sure you know where everything is. It’s been a while since you traveled here and I really appreciate it.”

I gave her the tour around the apartment, sure it wasn’t big but it was enough to stress me out, and have trouble keeping clean. Important numbers on the fridge, obviously call me if there’s an emergency. Snacks in one cabinet, dry food in another, what she likes and doesn’t so far, what she likes to do all day, hopefully, if the weather is nice they can go to a park. I went to get ready while Saja was distracted and put my bag together.

“Where we going?” she asked and patted my bag by the front door reaching for her shoes.

“Unfortunately today Pumpkin you have to stay with grandma while Mama goes to her first day of work.” I pushed the hair out of her eyes.

“But-”her eyes gazed over. “But I wanna go.” she pouted and big tears started forming.

“It’s just like that time that mama had to drop you off at daycare for the first time sweet pea, remember how much fun that turned out to be. You met Junie, and Kiri.”

“But I no want mama go.” she hiccuped.

“I know baby, I’ll be back before you go to bed I promise. Probably even before dinner ok.” I hugged her and spun her around. “It’ll be hard today, but easy tomorrow ok? Just gotta trust me.”

“Otay.” she wiped her eyes. “Promise come back?”

“I promise. I’m not ever leaving you.” I kissed her forehead.

And so that’s how the first day of the rest of my life began. I got to KQ, nearly died from exhaustion on how much they taught us that first day, raced home to be there for my kid before she went to sleep, and did it again for months, some days it was picking her up from daycare, sometimes my mom would take care of her. Of course, I made some work friends who wanted to hang out but I couldn’t… I can’t just go drinking after practice, I have to get home to watch the new episode of Octonauts, read bedtime stories, and make sure her “homework” (coloring.) is done.

“Oh come on y/n, come out with us.” Jaeun begged.

“I-I really can’t, I have to get back home.”

“What do you have a kid or something?” he teased.

“S-Something yeah. I um…just a tight schedule and I’m trying to make ends meet.”

“Oh second job?” Eun suggested.

“It’s just important and I can’t just…I don’t really have free time. I’m sorry, I really do want to but I have so much to do…” I bowed. “Thank you really. I appreciate it every time you ask me. I’ll see you around.”

I started to leave when a voice spoke up next to me.

“Nice work today y/n.” came the calm cool voice of none other than Jung Wooyoung.

“Th-Thank you Mr.Wooyoung.” I said again with a bow.

“Maybe they can’t convince you out but could I?” he quirked an eyebrow…..Is he flirting with me?

“I’m s-sorry I really have to go.” I picked up my bag and left. Did Jung Wooyoung just talk to me….and ask me out? Are you kidding me? I can’t get…I can’t.

“Mama.” called out the small voice waiting by my front door.

“Hi baby.” I picked her up and smiled once more. “I missed you too.”

“You look upset.” my mom said looking me over.

“It’s ok Mom, maybe later.” I didn’t want to talk about it in front of Saja. “For now, let me see what you learned today?”

“Color!” she ran over to the table after I set her down and started telling me the names of the colors.

“Wow look at you my smart girl.” I smiled and looked at the drawing she made of the rainbow. “Definitely going on the fridge today.”

“Yay!” she smiled and went to pick out the magnet for the drawing.

“I got asked out for drinks again.” I sighed.

“I would’ve watched her honey, you can go.”

“It wasn’t just by my coworkers this time…it was one of my bosses….I don’t know I’ve maybe bumped into him like 3 times but I haven’t really ever had a conversation with him and I…I couldn’t say yes.”

“Why not, it’s been a while since you had a date.”

“Mom I’m not really…dating material…I have a kid and…I don’t know.”

“y/n, you should try it…just…take a chance.”

“Maybe….I’ll…I’ll think about it mom.”

“I just want you to be happy kiddo, and to not feel so alone.”

“I’m never alone…but it would be a little nice to…think about some help…Mom he doesn’t want kids! What am I even saying.” I sighed.

“This one!!!” Saja ran back in with a rainbow magnet for her rainbow drawing. “I want dis one.” she smiled.

“Okay that one it is.” I smiled and took her rainbow to hang it up. “And so now which one is your favorite color?”

“Yellow.” she smiled.

“Good choice.” I kissed her head. “Come on let’s get ready for bed.”

I got her into her yellow duckie pajamas, we washed our faces, and we brushed our teeth and read together, she’s trying new words but also told me what color each things were. My smart girl.

“Goodnight Princess.” I whispered and kissed her head leaving the room.

“y/n.” my mom called me over. “I really want you to think about having fun with your friends.”

“I will mom…I…They don’t know I have a kid and I just, I don’t know wouldn’t it just be weird I’m suddenly the mom friend.”

“Honey, you already act like a mom because you’ve always been the mom friend.”

“I just don’t want to get hurt again….I don’t want Saja to get hurt again.” I looked back at her door.

One year ago, it was raining, I’d just gotten fired from my job for falling asleep in a meeting because my good-for-nothing partner wouldn’t take care of his own child at 2am. I came home to a screaming Saja, no furniture except her bed and mine, and a letter on the counter with photos of my worst fear….he was cheating on me this whole time. At least he had the decency to leave his keys. I was so scared I called my mom and that night I did the only thing I could hold onto my screaming one-year-old and cry too. I just wanted the best for her, unplanned or not she deserved as much love as I could give her. In some small ways, she tried too, if she saw me having a bad day after I couldn’t find a job she’d offer me a snack, if I fell asleep while we were together she’d curl up next to me and stay put so I could sleep. She was truly one of the best things if not the best thing to happen to me. I just wish I could give her a good life where she doesn’t have to worry about things at 2 years old…she shouldn’t see me cry already. Now the opportunity was knocking on my door, figuratively of course…Just the prospect of a date was terrifying, could I really let someone in like that again?

Jung Wooyoung is nothing but consistent…consistently a pain in my ass, he really doesn’t quit I mean at first it was every other day he’d ask if I was busy after work, but now it’s twice a week…he won’t stop…He’s famous, he’s…he’s an idol he wouldn’t want anything to do with me if I said I had a kid. He’d leave me alone…can I really expose myself like that? What if I get fired? I really need this job…Christ, what am I going to do? Just keep saying no he’ll give up and move on. Right.

“Oh you’re just mad someone actually said no to you Wooyoungie.” San teased his best friend as he pouted at another failed date attempt.

“It’s the way she carried herself, and that she always looks after the others, I mean I’ve seen her make sure everyone has water before drinking herself, and if someone looks unwell she’s the first one to check on them.” Wooyoung groaned flailing on the couch.

“Didn’t know you had a thing for moms.” Hongjoong chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“She’s a total mom friend making sure everyone else is taken care of.” he smiled at the younger one, rejection never looked so good on someone.

“You could’ve just dated Seonghwa if you were into that.” Mingi spoke up.

“He’s not my type.” Seonghwa flipped the page he was reading.

“No you’re not my type! I’m everyone’s type!” Wooyoung stood up flabbergasted by the thought. “Jung Wooyoung is everyone’s type.”

“Just don’t catch a harassment case.” Seonghwa sighed. “I like her a lot, she’s kind.”

How could she say no to Jung Wooyoung so many times, he’s charming, handsome, funny, super attractive, sexy, cute, hilarious, and a dance machine. Maybe he should start with…

“How about lunch?” Wooyoung smiled.

“Hmm?” I looked up at him.

“Come get lunch with me.” he nodded.

“Oh um I-”

“You never want to do anything after work so why not during, we get a long enough break, I’ll even buy for being a pain in the ass so much.”

“Really Mr. Wooyoung I’m flattered but I have my own, it’s alright.”

“You seriously have to stop calling me Mister, I’m not that old and I’m not even your boss.” he smiled. “Just have lunch with me…us really a group of us are going.”

“I……okay.” I said sheepishly thinking about how much my mom is going to yell at me for not going.

When he said group I wasn’t expecting all of Ateez to be the group. Oh god, do I look okI should really sit like Six feet away just in case there’s cameras and does my breath smell ok?

“Hi y/n!” seonghwa waved. At least he was kind….they all are I don’t know what I’m saying.

“H-Hi Seonghwa.” I flushed and waved back sitting at the small metal table with them, the chairs dragging on the floor causing the shrill sound to ring out.

“Guys this is y/n…the one rejecting Wooyoung.” he smiled.

“Okay so not cool!” Wooyoung yelled. “I finally get her to come down to lunch and you embarrass me.”

Lunch with Ateez was becoming a regular thing, every week now I’d go with Wooyoung and we’d chat and…I almost felt like another member, sure they did this with others but it felt really special…I felt special. Mom was right I do need more friends. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if I just let go and got to know Wooyoung. 

“Like a good mother.” Hwa chuckled.

I did a spit take. “Sorry! Just inhaled too much water.” I coughed and my phone started ringing. “Oh sorry I have to take this.” I got up to answer around the corner.

“Mama!” the voice came from the small face on my phone.

“Hi Pumpkin are you having fun with grandma?” I smiled.

“Grandma makes Tteokbokki like you! But not as yummy.” she smiled and held it up.

“Oh? But I learned from grandma so shouldn’t hers be better?”

“Oh now you know it was your grandmother that taught you this recipe, I can’t cook to save my life.” she chuckled.

“And who’s that?” came a voice from behind me.

“Shit!” I jumped and dropped my phone.

“y/n? y/n?” my mom spoke.

“Mama?” Saja called out.

“S-Seonghwa. I-”

“So you are an actual mom?” he smiled.

“N-No I-....I um…it’s my niece and I” I felt the anxiety creep in, I got nauseous and I could taste the bile in my throat.

“Can I see her?” he smiled and sat next to me and picked up my phone but face it away in case I said no.

“Mom I’ll call you back ok. Saja it’s ok.” I smiled lightly at the phone and hung up. “Am I fired?”

“Fired??? For what? Did you steal a water bottle too?” he smiled. “Those are free.”

“No for…for lying about not having a kid.”

“It doesn’t matter that you have a kid pabo.” he picked my face up. “Why’d you hide it?”

“I really needed the job, it’s just me providing and…I didn’t want to be turned down because I have a daughter.”

“I see…y/n you were hired because you are insanely talented and can dance circles around any of those guys, mom or not. I think they wouldn’t have been making you stay so late if they knew, it’s important to be there for a child too.”

“I really need this job Seonghwa.” I felt the tears fall.

“You’re not losing your job honey I promise. It’ll stay between us….only if you let me say hi.” he smiled.

“I…” I picked my phone up and called my mom back. “Hi Mom, um…sorry my um…my boss scared me and he…yeah.” I nervously handed Seonghwa the phone.

“Oh that’s not who I wanted to say hi to hi Mrs. (l/n) you’re very lovely, I wanted to meet y/n jr. though.”

“Oh Saja, come say hi to Mister??”

“Seonghwa.” he smiled waiting for the small child.

“Hi.” Saja said smally as my mom came down to her level with the phone. “Mama??”

“I’m here sweet pea.” I called and peeked over Seonghwa’s shoulder. “Hi baby, what’d you have for lunch?”

“Potatoe.” she said getting quite shy at the man looking at her.

“And?” my mom prompted. “We tried pajeon, and Kimchi for the first time.”

“Kimchi?” Seonghwa smiled, “how exciting. Did you like it?”

“Spicy.” she frowned.

“Maybe we’ll try radish Kimchi she likes crunchy things.” I nodded. “I should get back to my own lunch honey, anything you want to say to Mr. Seonghwa?”

“......pretty.” she blushed looking away from the phone.

I think Seonghwa short-circuited he nearly dropped my phone.

“I’ll be home after work okay, be good for grandma, bye mom, thank you.” I smiled softly and hung up. “Mr.Seonghwa?”

“You really are ana amazing person.” he smiled and hugged me. “Next time we’re meeting in person.”

“Wouldn’t that be unprofessional?” I questioned.

“I don’t care that little ray of sunshine is getting spoiled by her uncle Seonghwa now.” he smiled.

If Seonghwa could’ve felt the eyes burning into the back of his head at the glare Wooyoung was sending the older man he’d probably be dead. I on the other hand couldn’t process what just happened…everything felt so strange, letting Seonghwa in on my secret…I wasn’t sure I liked it but it was…nice to let something out.

“And what were you two talking about?” Wooyoung questioned as we sat back down.

“Nothing, I was just making sure she was ok.” Seonghwa shrugged like nothing happened.

“Sorry just a weird phone call. I’m okay.” I nodded and looked down at my lunch.

“Aww cute!” Wooyoung pointed out the note Saja had wrote for me. “Where’d you get that.”

“Must’ve came with the wrap, I didn’t notice.” I looked at the scribbles that I’m sure were supposed to be words but what really made me tear up was the heart, it was mishapen and wobbly but it was her.

“Hey? Are you sure you’re okay?” Wooyoung lifted my chin up before the tear hit the paper.

“Yes, I’m ok.” I looked at him and blushed a bright red.

“Promise?” he held out a pinky for me. Saja does the same….

“Promise.” I whispered and let a few tears fall.

That’s where my relationship with Wooyoung took a turn. I noticed the small things at first…the little notes in my bag, the heart on my water bottle, and getting me lunch, or a snack, he always came to talk to me during breaks, and we always sat next to each other if we could during things, bus rides to venues for performances, meetings, anything. It all felt so nice. I felt…happy. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to give him a chance…even just one. 

“Hi cutie!” Wooyoung yelled over the phone as I answered.

“Hi Woo.” I smiled lightly at the phone and walked out to the little patio I had.

“Why so quiet?” he questioned.

“No reason. Just enjoying the peace.” I had just put Saja down and I didn’t want to risk her waking up.

“Listen I was thinking-”

“Isn’t that a dangerous game.” I chuckled cutting him off.

“Come to dinner with me?” he smiled. “Please?”

“I-”

“Before you say no! Just…one chance, look I know you said your ex was terrible and left you with nothing but I just…y/n you’re great, and smart, and wonderful, and beautiful, and…and amazing…please…just one date so I can stop my terrible attempts at flirting. I’m running out of pick-up lines to use on you.”

“Wooyoung I….”I looked back at the apartment and a cool breeze wrapped around me sending a shiver down my spine. It would be nicer to try having someone else around. Was I ready for him to know everything? “Dinner sounds nice. Maybe Friday?”

“Friday.” he smiled, you could hear the grin. The wonderful grin followed by his melodic giggle. 

Maybe we can try again…maybe this time won’t hurt so bad. Maybe he’d stay.

You’re getting too ahead of yourself y/n. Just one dinner, and maybe it’ll be okay from there, just take it one day at a time.

Friday came quicker than I’d like and I still had no idea what to wear, what to do, all I knew was my mom was excited and I felt like I was going to throw up again.

“You know Saja likes watching him perform onstage, she says he moves the most like water.” my mom smiled. “She gets so happy seeing you on the tv.”

“I know…she asks to watch a performance before we go to bed usually.”

“Aren’t you excited?”

“No…I mean I am but, god this could go horribly wrong.”

“But it won’t, I’ve seen the little notes, you have this boy smitten like he’s a teenager.” she chuckled.

“Yeah but eventually I’m going to have to tell him about Her.” I motioned to my daughter.

“How do you know he doesn’t like kids?”

“I didn’t say that, but he has been thinking I’m just some poor single woman this whole time Mom, and I don’t know how to bring that up, Oh hi by the way I’ve been lying to you for 4 months, and actually have a two-year-old, hope that doesn’t change anything.” I groaned and pulled on the black cocktail dress I had picked out.

“Honey, I don’t think it will…you trusted Seonghwa with saying hello.”

“That was over the phone and this is different mom…this is a…potential love interest, you know a maybe boyfriend, Seonghwa is no more than a potential babysitter and even that’s a maybe.”

“I think you should let some people in…it’ll be good for you to have more than just me for her. Also I have plans for tonight”

“I know you’re right mom I just…. MOM!!! And you didn’t tell me!” I groaned and picked up my phone. “Fine.”

“Just giving you an extra push dear.”

“You are…I swear!” I hit dial.

“Hello?” the voice on the other end of my phone croaked out.

“Hey, could you…do me a favor.” I sighed.

“So you want me to meet your daughter, and babysit her while you go on a date with Wooyoung?” Seonghwa questioned me as I stood with him in the hallway.

“Yes…because my mom forced this…”

“How so.”

“She ‘made plans’ or whatever so now I need a babysitter or I have to tell Wooyoung I’ve been lying this whole time.” I sighed.

“Hey hey okay, I’ll do it.”

“I figured since you brought a goodie basket.” I eyed the stuffed animal behind him. “Saja.” I called out coming back inside. “Come meet Seonghwa.”

Seonghwa could barely contain himself waiting to meet my two year old.

“Mama?” Saja hid around the corner.

“Hey sweet pea, it’s okay…remember him, he’s from the tv.” I held out my hand for her and she walked over to hide behind me.

“Hi Saja.” Seonghwa said calmly and in a quiet tone getting down to her level. “I’m Seonghwa, I work with your mama, remember we talk on the phone.”

“....pretty.” she blushed.

“She remembers.” I pat her head. “Why don’t you show Mr.Seonghwa the painting you did.” she nodded and ran to go get her newest art piece and came back over, she stopped and looked between me and him before taking a cautious step forward. 

“Oh my goodness, look at this.” he smiled. “Okay let’s see….a cat?” she nodded. “Wow what a beautiful cat. What’s his name?”

“Rainbow.” she said quietly.

“Rainbow? What a perfect name.” he smiled. “And is mama going to hang it up?” he looked up at me.

“Yes” she smiled and ran off to find the magnet.

“She likes you, I promise, she’s just shy at first.” I breathed. “I have to get going I don’t…want to be late.” I looked at her in the kitchen.

“I promise nothing bad will happen.” Seonghwa tried reassuring me.

“Last time I left her alone with a man he took everything and left.” I brushed him off and grabbed my things.

“Y/n” Seonghwa placed a hand on my shoulder and I tensed up. “I understand, but you deserve some help, and some fun.”

“She’s all I have Seonghwa.”

“Y/n I promise she’s in great care, I wouldn’t dream of hurting either of you.”

I sighed. “Saja. Come give mama a hug please?” she came running over with a new magnet for her cat drawing.

“Where go?” she questioned holding her arms up for a hug.

“Mama is going to go see a friend because she really likes this friend ok? It’s called a date.”

“Date?” she questioned more.

“See when two adults, like mama and her friend like each other more than just friends, which is a very complicated feeling to understand even for adults, they go out to do things together, like eat dinner or watch a movie.”

“Why?”

“To see if they like each other’s company more than other people.” I smiled. “However no one’s company is better than yours sweet pea.” I kissed her nose. “So you stay here and play with Seonghwa and Mama will be back later, like when you stay with Grandma.”

“Are we go on a date too?” she whispered.

“Sure.” I smiled and she was blushing as I put her down. “Have fun okay?”

“Yes ma’am.” Seonghwa smiled and Saja walked back over to her table.

My phone dinged again and I made my way out and downstairs to Wooyoung and his very expensive car.

“Didn’t know you could drive.” I raised an eyebrow,

“Very recent, you look beautiful” he smiled.

“Thank you.” I blushed and he opened the car door for me. “Not so shabby yourself sir.”

“Thank you.” he smiled and closed the door gently and mumbled to himself he told me what he said later was “Wow she looks beautiful.” however I think  “okay rizz master Wooyoung, you gotta work.” sounds more like what he actually said…don’t let him tell you otherwise.

“So I was just thinking a quiet dinner without all the noise from the guys and maybe a walk?” he smiled.

“Sure, I’m just along for the ride.” I nodded. “It’s been a while since I’ve done this so you’re going to have to carry me along.”

“Don’t worry I’ve got you.” he smiled.

Throughout the course of dinner I learned that work Wooyoung, friend Wooyoung, and date Wooyoung are three very different people. He seems different.

“Yeah no order whatever you like.” he smiled and gestured to the menu.

“I’m not used to this kind of stuff.” its usually chicken nuggets and mac and cheese…why am I suddenly craving it…or pizza, I could so go for a pizza right now.

“Well only the best for you.” he smiled nervously. “How am I going to pay for this?!” he thought to himself.

“Right.” I swallowed nervously and looked at the menu. There aren’t even prices listed. “Wooyoung?” I looked up at him over the menu.

“Hmm? Yes, oh did you have a question?”

“Have you ever eaten here before?”

“Oh yeah loads of times!” why am I lying??” 

“What do you recommend?” I blushed a little, I knew he made good money but…I don’t know this seems a bit much.

“Well there’s the uh Hakarl.” he said and pointed. “That’s good and then the Bird’s Nest Soup.” he nodded.

“Oh okay. Why don’t you pick for me, I mean I want whatever you’re having.” I shrugged. He knew what he was talking about.

“I don’t have a clue what I’m saying! What did I even recommend!” he yelled at himself.

When the waiter came back he ordered for us and we left it at that, I finished my glass of wine and looked around at some of the dishes…they all looked interesting…to be kind…I don’t know if I can do this.

“Um excuse me.” I pulled a waiter aside and asked about the dish he had just served. “What did she order?”

“Ah that ma’am is the Bird’s Nest Soup” he smiled. “You see the saliva turns hard-”

“Thank you.” I interrupted and turned back to Wooyoung. Saliva? “Wooyo-”“Y/n” we both said at the same time.

“You go first.” he gestured.

“Wooyoung I really appreciate this but I…I can’t do this…this food is…it’s way too much for me.”

He sighed….here it comes.

“Thank god.” he breathed out. “I really didn’t want to find out what the other thing I ordered is.”

“Can’t we just go get a slice of pizza? Like normal?” I looked down at my hands.

“Please.” he stood up and walked over to our waiter talking to him before handing over his company card and explaining everything. “Let’s go before they bring it out.”

I nodded.

What started off horrible and scary turned into something magic, we found a place by the park close to my apartment and got three sliced of whatever pizza sounded good and just sat in the park. Much more my speed, much more…relaxed.

“I just wanted to impress you.” Wooyoung looks down at the slice of pizza in his lap. “I thought…maybe you’d like it if I took you somewhere special.”

“Who says Pizza isn’t special?” I looked at him but his eyes were turned down to the ground. “Woo?”

“I just….I really like you, especially the more I’ve gotten to know you, you’re kind, and gentle, and just…you’re absolutely wonderful y/n and I really fucked this up tonight.”

“Hey.” I nudged him. “Hey” I said a little more sternly and lifted his chin up to meet his gaze. “I’m still here aren’t I?....I appreciate that you think I deserve some fancy restaurant where we sit 10 feet away from each other and the menus don’t have prices and we’re waited on hand and foot, but…that’s not my speed. I prefer picnics and pizza and bullet train sushi and…fried chicken, and mac and cheese, and stupid little fruit cups.” I smiled at him. “I like it when we have lunch together and we eat ramen or tteokbokki, or even rabokki!”

“I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for Wooyoung.” I kissed his cheek. “I’m having a great time eating pizza in my favorite park with my second favorite person on the planet.”

“Who’s the first?”

“No one you need to worry about.” I chuckled and blushed.

“Ahhh your mom then.” he smiled. “Thank you…for not letting me feel like I completely fucked this up.”

“Quite the contrary, you’ve shown me that I really mean something to you…I mean that place was faannncyyyy.”

“You do mean something to me.” he looked into my eyes and there was that intensity that he had when he was dancing. The look of “I’m doing this and no one can stop me.”

“Thank you.” I rubbed his cheek.

You know how it goes, he walked me home, I got the third degree from my mom on how it went…except Seonghwa joined in, I tucked my two year old into bed and then…I had a full moment in bed in my pajamas where I squealed and kicked my legs and just…he kissed my cheek and held my hand and and and…pizza. Yeah. I could…I could get used to having Wooyoung.

It was just like any other day, it was warm and sunny, Wooyoung wanted to go out on a date and we decided another park date, kimbap which of course he made, in fact he made all of the food we ate, mandu, rolled omelet, potato salad, some pajeon, and finally because this obviously isn’t enough food for two people he also made my favorite cucumber salad . I really am one special girl. 

“Woo this is too much.” I chuckled looking over at him as he kept bringing out more food.

“Nonsense, you’ll love this.” he smiles but you can tell there’s something bothering him.

“Are you ok?” I looked at him his face tight.

“Yeah, no it’s..it’s nothing I’m fine.” he nodded but he seemed more in his own head now.

“How about next time I’ll make the kimbap? I’ve been told I make it pretty good.” I smiled trying to lighten the mood.

Sure everything was going well, I really like him but I don’t know he seems a little distant recently and I can tell something is bothering him. I…

“Woo?” I said putting down my things. “You know we can talk about things right?”

“I….y/n…I….” he started and closed his mouth a few times. “What’s your relationship with Seonghwa?”

“Seonghwa? I don’t know…friends I guess. I mean I can certainly feel safe around him.” I looked at him confused.

“I know…what I’m about to say is…I know…Are you…Are you cheating on me?”

“What no?!” I looked at him incredulously. “Cheating?? Wooyoung I would-”

“Then why is it that you drop everything when he calls?” he looked at me getting a little teary eyed. “Why is it that when he calls you leave the room? Hmm? What private conversation can’t Wooyoung hear?” he was getting upset.

“Wooyoung it’s not like that-” I started.

“Well then how is it y/n! Because it certainly seems like you two aren’t just friends!”

“Woo please listen to me.” I said my voice quivering a bit. “Please take a breath and listen.”

“Then start explaining…I thought it was me and only me.”

“It is!”

“I saw you together!!” he stood up angrily.

“He’s just my friend Wooyoung I swear nothing more!” I looked at him, my own tears blurring my vision. “Wooyoung I would never cheat on you I swear, please just listen to me!”

“So you can lie about-”

“Mama?” a small voice called out. 

Fuck.

“S-Saja!” Seonghwa’s voice called out.

“Seonghwa?” Wooyoung looked over at his friends familiar voice. “What are you doing with a child?”

“Mama!” Saja threw herself into my arms hugging me tightly. “Hi!”

“H-Hi sweet pea.” I looked at her and moved her hair lightly, I could feel Wooyoung looking at the scene before him. “Wooyoung, this is Saja…my…daughter.”

“Daughter? Are you two-?”

“No! Wooyoung I’m just…I just babysit while you two go out.” Seonghwa looked at him.

“Is she yours?” Wooyoung looked at the child and then back to Seonghwa.

“No.” I said and held her closer. “She’s my ex’s…he left…Seonghwa just…he found out I had her and I needed someone to look after her because I really wanted to go out with you but I…” I felt like I could throw up.

“Wooyoung did…I wouldn’t do something like that to you.” Seonghwa looked at the younger male, anger burning behind his pupils.

Wooyoung looked between us grabbing his things.

“Wooyoung, don’t leave…you’ll regret it if you do.” Seonghwa warned the younger male. I covered Saja’s ears.

“Well what was he supposed to think Seonghwa…afterall I drop everything when you call, I go to you when I don’t know what to do, I call you late at night because she’s crying.” I shrugged. “I would think the same….Maybe I should go.” I moved to get up but Wooyoung stopped me before I could get further.

“No.” he looked at the blanket. “Don’t.”

“Saja why don’t you and Hwa go play.” I looked at her and kissed her forehead.

“Hwa Hwa!!! You It!” she got up and ran away.

Wooyoung sat back down and folded his hands together in front of me.

“Wooyoung I…This isn’t how I wanted it to go.” I looked away from him. “I promise there is nothing go on between us other than he’s my babysitter…I think of him as my older brother honestly. I have feelings for you and you only.”

He stayed quiet before nodding and looking over at Seonghwa and Saja playing.

“Why’d you lie y/n? About…her?”

“No one would hire a single mom…I needed the money before she got kicked out of preschool and we lost our apartment so I begged my mom to come help take care of her just until I had enough that I could come clean about it.”

“We have plenty of parents I don’t understand.” he looked at me.

“By the time I finally got to KQ I had been turned down so many times I-I-I panicked it was the only thing I could think of and I was desperate and they..you were all so kind and I-” tears rushed down my face. “And then you showed up and everyone else and then Seonghwa found out and I got scared and you kept asking me out and making me smile and…this isn’t how I wanted you to meet. I wanted you to meet her please.”

He stayed quiet and I wiped my face, before I knew it he brought me into him and rubbed my back.

“I really have made an ass out of myself haven’t I?” he whispered into my hair.

“I understand where you’re coming from though Woo really.” I held onto him.

“Tell me everything.” he asked

I told him our backstory, how my ex left, cheated, basically robbed me, how Hwa found out, I told him what I could and he listened.

“I’d really like to meet her if you let me.” he picked up my face and cupped my cheek. “I promise I’ll listen better.”

“Woo it’s not your fault, what were you supposed to think.”

“That my girlfriend wouldn’t cheat on me.” he squeezed me a little. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too…..I’d really like for you to meet her.” I looked at him. “This isn’t how I wanted you to find out.”

“Whenever you’re ready.” he brushed my hair back often like I do for Saja. “Some times…things work out differently than we want them to.”

“Are you still mad?” I asked.

“I’m still….trying to figure out why.” he sighed. “It makes sense but…I just…I.”

“You can be upset Wooyoung, its a big thing I hid from you.” I shied away from him.”Does it change how you feel about me?”

“I don’t know…maybe? I….I mean-” he looked up at me and I knew he could see it, the heartbreak on my face, I never was good at hiding it. “No baby I-”

“No…no it’s fine Wooyoung…” I moved off him. “I wouldn’t…” I stood up and turned away from him. “I wouldn’t feel the same about me either, it’s probably why I got rejected from everything else.” probably even why he left in the first place. “We’ll just go.”

“No baby, stay. We can have lunch, I’m sorry.” Wooyoung pleaded.

“Mama? Can I has water?” Saja came over tired from playing.

“Here!” Wooyoung jumped up and opened a bottle for her. “I made all this food would you like a snack?”

She looked at me and I nodded and we sat back down only this time apart.

“Y/n.” Seonghwa looked at me.

“It’s nothing.” I turned away from both of them to pay attention to my daughter. “It’s just me and Saja.”

Seonghwa looked over at Wooyoung who looked down at the blanket and pushed food over to us before looking to Seonghwa and away again.

“Saja what do you say?”

“Gram…Sa…Ham…Mama what was it?” she looked at me. “Oh! Hamyida!”

“Good.” I chuckled and wiped her face. “We’ll get going now, thanks for running into us Seonghwa…It was nice to meet you.” I got up and helped Saja up before starting our walk home.

“Mommy?” Saja looked up at me.

“Yes sweet pea?” I stopped.

“Why you look sad?”

“Oh don’t worry angel, I’m okay. I just really thought it’d turn out different.”

“Like what?” she questioned. Every the curious two year old.

“It’s nothing you need to worry about Saja.” I picked her up.

“Can we play with Hwa Hwa tomorrow too?” she yawned.

“I’ll ask him later baby. Let’s get you home.”

I got her home, and of course, she was asleep on me when we walked in. I put her down and sat by her bed, I couldn’t stop the tears that came down my face. I thought everything would work out this time, I thought that maybe…maybe one day he’d be here too…maybe she’d go to sleep and we’d stay up and watch a movie together, maybe we’d play games, or have friends over, or…it was always too much to ask. Too much for me to be happy. Not even a text when I walked through the door. Was this really over?......I’ll turn in my resignation on Monday. 

Monday came and went but my computer screen remained blank, I didn’t want to write a resignation letter it’s only been a few months but, I loved my job, I loved the guys, my friends….I loved him. I called in sick I just couldn’t see him, of course by now Seonghwa and Wooyoung had told CEO Kim who asked if there was anything he could do, if Saja was sick or anything. No. There was nothing anyone could do.

“Mama again!” Saja called out pointing to the finished episode of Paw Patrol. I replayed it for her and pulled myself into the chair more, staring at the blank document.

“Saja I’m going to the potty, don’t answer the door like usual ok?”

“Otay!” she smiled and sang along to the theme song.

I just wanted to splash some cold water on my face, something to get it out of my system.

“Hi!” I heard Saja yell from the living room.

“Saja? I told you-”

“Hwa Hwa!!!” she screamed and I ran out to see two men standing in my now open doorway.

“Sorry, I used the spare key.” Seonghwa flushed and spun Saja upside down.

“Why are you here?” I stood there wanting to grab my child from them.

“Baby I’m sorry.” Wooyoung pleaded. “Please can we talk.”

“No, it’s fine. You don’t need to apologize.”

“I do. Please.”

I pushed him out into the hallway and closed the door.

“Wooyoung you shouldn’t…you made it clear how you felt.” I looked away from him.

“No I didn’t because that wasn’t how I felt. That isn’t how I feel y/n.”

“Then how do you feel, because I think “I don’t know if they changed” after that means anything different but it-”

“It didn’t change how I felt okay! I…I panicked…I freaked out because I…You have a kid and sure I love little kids, I love Kyungmin, I love babysitting, and I love playing dress up and tag and…I really love them you know I do, but…it was scary. I no longer had to impress just you I’d have to impress your daughter, I’d have to figure out how to…be a good role model and…take care of her and I’m just a cool uncle or big brother I’ve never had to…be a parent.”

“You’re not her parent Wooyoung.” I crossed my arms. “And how do you think I’m going to feel! We Slept-” I quieted down. “You were the first person I’ve slept with since I had her and you just……..I’m her parent Wooyoung.”

“Yes but we’re dating, so that means I need to be there for her too, because you don’t just date the one person, that’s the most important person in your life I can’t just…I have to be a good example. None of it changed how I felt about you, after you two left I just wanted to do it all over again, I wanted to ask you on a picnic and play tag and push her on the swings and..please believe me y/n, I want to try again. I feel so stupid ok, I have real genuine feelings for you and I hurt you I know I did, I just…one more chance baby please. I’m sorry y/n please. I promise I’ll spend the rest of my life apologizing if you just give me one chance to make it up to you.”

I sighed. “It’s not up to just me Woo….give me two seconds.” I walked back inside and he stayed in the hallway. “Saja?”

“Hi mommy!” she called out from the couch where she was giving Seonghwa a makeover. “Princess Hwa Hwa.” she smiled.

“Oh how lovely.” I smiled and looked at Hwa…I need a photo. “One photo so we can remember your masterpiece?”

“You can take ONE photo. Make it count.” Seonghwa looked at me and I took a photo of him and Saja.

“Saja honey?” I came down to her level. “Would you like to meet mommy’s friend from the other day? The one with all the food.”

“Yeah!” she smiled. “The one mommy likes!”

“Yes, the one mommy likes.” I smiled. “Come on.”

I carried her to the door and took a breath, everything was going to change once I opened this door.

“Ready!” she called out. Ok.

I opened the door half expecting Wooyoung to dart…thank god he was still there when I opened my eyes.

“Saja, this is Wooyoung.” I looked at him. “Wooyoung this is my daughter, Saja.”

“Hi!” she smiled and waved.

“Hello Saja.” he smiled back. “It’s very nice to meet you.” He pulled a flower out from behind his back.

“Where did you-?” I looked at him.

“Flower!” she smiled and took it. “Mommy likes a maggisin!”

“Would you like to come in for coffee.” I looked at him.

“I would love to.” he smiled

This was it, Wooyoung was entering my life, he was seeing the real me and my daughter. I set Saja down to go play with Seonghwa but she stayed and talked to Wooyoung, she showed him all the pictures she drew and all the things she did for pre-school, he smiled and listened the whole time. He helped with a snack since she was getting hungry and he even let her do his hair, and for once in the past 7 months I’ve known him, I could finally breathe. It felt as though a weight has been taken off my chest and I could actually let him see me, the real me. It felt good. It felt so fucking good.

Wooyoung is a wonderful partner, truly. Saja loves him, she’s started calling him every night before bed if he isn’t here to tuck her in, she likes to tell him about her day, he plans dates with all three of us and sometimes even just the two of us, the guys have slowly been introduced to her and they all claim to be her favorite uncle (we all know its Seonghwa). Wooyoung has been maybe slowly moving in slightly, his stuff appears more and more, and what do you know he’s usually attached to it, and now, almost a year later her birthday was coming up and I had no idea what to do.

“Okay I know it her birthday but I was thinking we could bring her to work and surprise the guys for a birthday party?” he rubbed my cheek, the soft sunlight drifting in for the morning.

“She would like it, especially if San and Hwa were there, and Mingi, she likes being tall.” I kissed the palm of his hand.

“I’m sorry.” he said and looked at me fondly.

“For what?” I questioned.

“For everything. For being ignorant, and stupid. For-”

“You don’t have to keep apologizing for that.” I held his wrist gently.

“I told you I’m apologizing for it every day.” he kissed my nose.

“Good Morning!” Saja called out and climbed into the bed and on top of Wooyoung. “Wooyoungie!”

“Hi Princess good morning.” he smiled and kissed her head. “Did you sleep well?”

“From the looks of her bed head I’d say so.” I chuckled.

“Well I better get those pigtails back in before Hwa Hwa sees you then hmm?” Wooyoung lifted her up and got up to go to the bathroom with her.

“Woo?” he turned around. “It’s a great idea.” I smiled. He smiled back and nodded.

As I made breakfast Wooyoung made sure they got their morning ritual done, you always have to dance in the morning if you want your day to go well according to him. Saja likes spending time with him and frankly, this past year it’s been so nice to not feel like a single parent.

“Okay and 1,2,...3 and 4. Good! Okay Okay. shh shh.” Wooyoung spoke. “Eomma!!” he called out.

“Yes?” I peaked around the corner.

“Saja wants to show you something.” he smiled and nodded for her.

He started playing the music to Case 143, the chorus specifically and she looked like she was going to do it but then turned to Wooyoung and looked scared.

“I can’t” she whispered. He stopped the music and got down to her level.

“Hey hey what’s wrong princess?” he scooped her up.

“I can’t do it.” she sniffled.

“Of course you can.” he smiled. “You practiced hard with me while eomma was busy.”

“Too hard.” she looked away from him.

“I think she’s just nervous to do it alone Woo.” I looked at him and gave him a small smile.

“Do you want me to do it with you princess?” he pushed her hair back.

“Want Youngie do it too.” she whispered to him.

“Wooyoungie will do it too.” he nodded. “Okay? Together?” this time it was her turn to nod.

He started the music over and set her down.

She looked at him as they started and even though she was shy she saw him do it and knew he meant it when he said he’d do it with her. It gave her the boost she needed to do it too. Before my eyes here she was trying her best to dance along to Case 143 by Stray Kids and for an almost 3-year-old, she did a great job.

“Oh sweet pea that was amazing!!” I scooped her up and kissed her face. “Such a good dancer.” I smiled.

“Like Appa!” she smiled and pointed to Woo. I stumbled a little.

“O-Okay breakfast time.” Wooyoung clapped and took Saja and sat at the table to eat breakfast. “Baby? Come eat ok?”

“Y-Yeah.”

We’d talk about it…after breakfast.

“I’m sorry.” Wooyoung confessed. “She started calling me that last week when I was watching her when you had to stay late with Yunho and I didn’t correct it but she knew you would be scared if you heard and-”

“Is that what you want?” I looked at him. “Is this what you want? You know you can’t leave if she starts calling you that.”

“You are what I want y/n. Nothing else. Just this.” he nodded, I’ve never seen him look so serious. “I may be young and handsome, but I-I I can be a dad too.”

“Are you sure?” I held his hand and he gave me a firm squeeze.

“I’m sure.” he nodded.

“Of course you taught her how to dance.” I wiped my face and chuckled.

“She’s got quite a talent, I think she picked it up from her mom.” he smiled and kissed my cheek. “I’m not going anywhere..in fact, I was waiting until her birthday but…Maybe it’s time I…move in?”

“And what else could you possibly bring over…You already live here.” I smiled and kissed him.

“I have some other things.” he chuckled and kissed me back.

“I love you Jung Wooyoung.” I smiled and held onto him.

“And I love you l/n f/n.” he smiled back and held my hips.

Do I wake up every morning with my hair in every direction, toothpaste foaming at the mouth, a stained t-shirt and pajama pants, and a toddler crying because I can’t hold her? Not every morning…sometimes I wake up in the arms of my loving boyfriend, sometimes with no clothes, and sometimes I wake up to the sight of my daughter getting ready for the day with her two favorite people, I see a smile on her face as her appa cries dropping her off for school, I see the joy on her face when the guys come over and San talks to her about her day, I see my daughter being surrounded by more love than I could ever ask for. Surrounded by her 7 uncles and her appa, better than I could’ve asked for. 

Sometimes I wake up to the biggest smile I could ever see, more radiant than the sun, and I know this is all real. Wooyoung is real, and he’s here Forever.

[pan-magi]

On one hand, I hate that I'm making a vent post on this fandom blog. On the other hand, I am really annoyed and in a bad mood for unrelated reasons so I'm going to do it anyway.

I want to murder and destroy all the porn bots clogging the magi tags. It's infuriating.

"Because you follow #magi

*porn bot post*"

No, no, no. GO TO HELL.

Magi is already a small fandom. A lot of religious and spiritual blogs also use it. Even if they don't tags things with magi exclusively, I get a lot of Madoka Magica blogs recommended to me because of the series' full name (Puella Magi Madoka Magica). Nothing against them, of course, love existential magical girls. Point being I can bet none of us give a fucking shit. Leave our small tag alone!

I could just not visit the your tags page but the "because you follow x" posts pop up on home and following regardless. And I like checking in on random tags sometimes. It helps to not miss posts from people who simply have Magi as their anime of the week or whatever.

I do hate just to make this a vent post, so I'll add some anecdotal Magi stuff that I've already been thinking to make a shit post about. Unfortunately, I have not had anymore fandom related dreams. *

I will blab about the screenshot I chose for this though. I lowkey adore that scene. Morgiana just casually kidnapping her friend, so they can talk it out. (For reference, it's when she meets Alibaba in the Fog Troupe hideout and then just picks him up and leaves).

The funny thing is, they're not really friends at this point? Out of the trio and their relationships so far, Alibaba and Morgiana haven't had much time together. Morg is grateful that Alibaba freed her, yet I'll say they both are better friends with Aladdin right now.

Morgiana does bring this up. Her reasoning for taking Alibaba is so that he can talk to Aladdin and they can sort out their shit. She could see that the kid from Alibaba giving him the cold shoulder and is like "no." It's heartwarming. It's not something I'll recommend, sometimes people need space from each other and kidnapping is bad, still though- I love it lmao.

Best trio, ngl.

*I have since had a sorta Magi related dream since first writing this about a week ago. In it I met Ohtaka, except I've only ever looked at a few pictures of her before and know for a fact that how she looked in the dream isn't how she is irl. Maybe that's why it took me forever to recognize her. The first half was us basically meeting and talking about trivial stuff, not Magi or Orient because of not recognizing her, and the second half was me realizing my missed opportunity of fangirling and trying to find her again when she was not busy to get one of my volumes of Magi signed. Not in a desperate way but more of "ahhh, I'm so dumb and missed my chance. Bummer." I was way more melancholic about it compared to if I ever had the opportunity in real life. As if I knew it was a dream and not get too worked up about it.

My dreams are a lot more convoluted and trippy but that is the gist of the Magi related portion of the dream. The rest is irrelevant for this. Don't remember too much of it anyway.

That's all I have. This turned out long and I may trim it up. I feel better after typing it. That is what matters.

Fuck porn bots and may this small fandom prosper without them.

[rosedominatesyou]

Bedtime Stories w/ Rose

ੈ✩‧˚ Seeing Stars ‧˚ੈ✩

(Bedtime Story #2)

Good evening again my precious babies, I was able to write you all another bedtime story 💜 Remember to keep it in your likes until you’re snuggled up in your beds ready to fall asleep.

Before reading: Everything I’m about to say is real and actually happened. I’ve withheld things like certain locations and last names to be respectful to the people in the story.

If you all thought my last story was a wet sapphic dream, this next one might kill you if you’re a gamer. This is the tale of the stupid boy I let come across the country and sleep in my bed for two weeks. I must warn you, the beginning is much nicer than how it turns out.

~'*•.¸♡¸.•*'.・。゜✭・.・✫・。.'*•.¸♡¸.•*'~

Please look up the song “New Dork Pity” by Small Talks/Cayley Spivey.

The first video game console I ever owned was a Nintendo 64. I loved everything about the gaming experience. I have so many memories of staying up late and playing a brand new game I just got. The smell of the box after you took off the plastic wrap, ahhh it was my favorite.

I wasn’t doing much else at some point except sitting on the couch playing Destiny. I was completely obsessed. I had loved a lot of other games before this, but something about the world it built had me hooked. It took me a long time to finally start interacting with people in the game, but one day a random player invited me to join their raid group. I almost didn’t do it, because of my experience with using a mic (my voice is very feminine, and I got harassed a lot for being a ‘gamergirl’), but I always wondered what would have happened if I turned that guy down. If I never agreed to that one thing.

Destiny raids became my life. I didn’t think I could get more obsessed.

The group of guys I got to know became some of the best friends I ever had. They were surprisingly all really nice. They would flock to defend me if anyone was rude or mean to me, and I was always the one in charge during our runs. I think about them all the time, and I know they probably think about me a lot too.

Not everyone could play all the time, one of our dudes had a wife and kids, and he was always the first to tell us he had to go. A regular occurrence during raid night was all of us sitting around sending out invites to everyone we knew so that we could get a 6th guy.

That’s how I met Gio. Or, well, we all called him Shepherd, because that was the short version of his gamertag. He was someone’s friend that was the first to reply. I didn’t think much of him at first: he was really cocky, telling everyone what to do and how we were going to run it, but he was also really good. Most of the randoms we invited were total scubs, but not Shep. He knew how to play. But he also learned quickly that I was the one who called the shots.

We’d end up running the same raid group together every week for a year straight.

I don’t have good mobility in my thumbs anymore because of how much playing I did. Shep and I were a dream team, plowing through the Trials of Osiris and getting to the lighthouse countless of times. There was a Valentine’s themed event that used the song “Just The Two Of Us” as the intro and it will forever make me think of that stupid fucking boy.

It would be getting late, and everyone else in our group would slowly start signing off. “You going to bed too, Goat?” They’d ask me. (Yes, he was my Shepherd and I was his Goat..)

I’d lie and say that I was, but Shep was doing the same thing and we would both put our status to offline and stay in the game together. We wouldn’t even play, just let our ships float in orbit as we talked to eachother. Sometimes we would run around the tower all night together while we talked about game lore.

One time we had our characters ‘pose’ in the lounge so that I could take a screenshot and “finally have a photo of us together”. His Titan and my Hunter. Even after everything you’re about to read that happens, I still have that screenshot printed out, buried deep in a box somewhere in my closet with the rest of my old memories.

It was time to stop acting like this wasn’t a relationship. We were having phone sex regularly and everyone in our group knew you couldn’t get between us.

I still hadn’t seen what he looked like, well, not really. He was very into cosplay, so any picture he sent me was him with a mask/helmet on. I got him to video chat with me once, but he hid most of his face behind the blanket the whole time.

Once I graduated high school, I had signed a work contract to be a live-in maid for a family in Germany, and I only had the summer left until I was to leave (shhh, I know, a bedtime story for another time). I was to be gone for several months, and I was afraid that Giovanni would forget about me by the time I got back. He didn’t. He told me that he thought about me everyday I was gone.

We made plans for us to see eachother. He offered to spend all of his own money to come out here. He lived in Chicago, and I lived in California.

I already had lots of experience with relationships at this point, but never with a boy. I was going to be the first girl he’d ever be with too. I wasn’t really sure what I was feeling. I didn’t want it to be like this at first, but Gio was always just…there. It just happened.

Here’s a small snipit from a journal entry I wrote two months before he was to arrive:

“What if he isn’t what I want when we’re together? What if when we first kiss I don’t feel anything? What if he is even more persistent in person? What if it’s all just me and he’s a great guy but I just don’t feel for him? What if he doesn’t like me? What if it all just falls apart?”

I always found it helpful to ask myself questions when I journal. I thought these were all stupid things to worry about at the time, but they were all so incredibly valid.

My heart was beating so fast when I parked at the airport. I walked into the baggage claim area and stood and waited to see him. Again, I had barely seen what he looked like, and when I did finally see him, I realized that I don’t think we talked about height either.

Y’all 🙈 He was one of the ugliest boys I’ve ever seen. I’m sorry. You can laugh, I give you permission to hate him. If you use the 1-10 scale then I would say he was a 2.

Even though I was a little shocked by his appearance, it was still so incredibly overwhelming to see him walking towards me. His stupid stupid fucking voice in person, I grabbed onto him and we spun around in circles in a tight hug. I was an inch taller than him, and his skinny frame was easy for me to pick up as we hugged.

When I first told my mom about Gio wanting to come visit, i don’t think I need to explain to any of you the joy my mother had on her face. Her daughter finally dating a boy?! It was a dream come true. She said he could stay with us, at our house. “But maybe we should get him a hotel the first few nights in case it doesn’t work out!”

My mother was over the moon, and i couldn’t believe she was telling me it would be okay to let him sleep at our house. I wasn’t allowed to let my girlfriends sleep over, but this random boy I met online can?

I drove him from the airport to the hotel we booked for him. We got all his things together and settled down at the foot of the bed in his room. We still hadn’t kissed yet, and I got this sensation that I should just ‘get it over with’ whether it felt like the right time or not. He was in the middle of talking about something when I suddenly leaned in and pressed my lips against him, his tongue immediately entering my mouth.

It shocked me, making me instantly slap him in the face.

It’s hard remembering my feelings back then (I blocked a lot of it out). I mostly just wanted to see how it was all going to play out. He was already here wasn’t he? So I let him stay, even though I wasn’t feeling what I wanted to feel.

I really don’t remember much after this. The next thing that makes any sense to my brain is 3 days later, he’s sleeping in the guest room of my childhood home and my heart it about to explode out of my chest as I walk downstairs to his door.

He was waiting for me. I asked him to take it out for me. This was my first up close look at a cock outside of porn, and my my, the boy was a 2 earlier but now we’ll make him a 3.

He didn’t last one minute inside me.

‘The seal was broken’ as they say and we did absolutely nothing else except have sex for the rest of the trip. My back was starting to get bedsores from just laying there as he thrusted into me for hours. He actually started to last a lot longer as the days went on, but we went through so many condoms that the trip was only a week in before we ran out.

I’ve never been so entranced. I knew that the mind can be hypnotized, but I never knew that it could happen physically. I couldn’t think, I literally couldn’t move. I would fall in and out of consciousness that i’d come to and he would still be using me.

Like I said, we ran out of condoms, and I told him we couldn’t do it anymore until we got up and went to the store.

But we didn’t go to the store. I would start to roll away and he would use his hands to bring me back. My eyes were half open as I watched him already putting it in me and asking, “Can’t I just feel you?” My mouth couldn’t work. I wanted to say no.

We had made plans to visit a nearby major city, one of the most famous cities in the world. It was my favorite place to go, and I was so excited to show him a city he’d never been. He complained the whole time, telling me how confusing all the streets were. I also wanted to show him some Tegan and Sara as we drove around, and even after telling him they were my favorite band, he told me that he “didn’t think they were anything special.” Asshole.

I remember standing with him, looking out at the ocean and trying to think of the right way to say how I felt. Should I just say it? Should I? Should I? Should I?! *this is a rApe tw*

“Gio….you know you raped me last night? You know that right?”

He looked so confused, “What? You can’t rape your girlfriend?”

Oh the anger and sadness I felt. I still needed to spend acouple more days with him, letting him fuck me as I watched the hours pass. And I don’t want to give the impression that I wasn’t enjoying it most of the time, I was, but after what he said it just changed everything.

I took him back to the airport, and as soon as I got back to my room, I just started bawling my eyes out. I’ve never cried so hard in my life. My bed still smelled like him. We still had food and drinks everywhere from our nights together. I made him leave his deodorant stick behind and I just held it to my nose as I cried myself to sleep.

Three days after he left, I snapped out of it. His lingering physical effect on my body had finally seeped out of me, and my clear head made me realize that I didn’t ever want to talk to or see that boy ever again.

I was working at a diner as a waitress during this time. I had to bring a water bottle with me and always ended up forgetting it when I left for the day. Gio made it a habit to remind me after I got off to bring it with me.

I broke up with him over the phone a week after he got home. He didn’t seem that surprised. The last thing he ever said to me was a text I got as I walked out of the diner to my car, it said, “Don’t forget your water bottle.”

I didn’t reply.

That’s the end of our story babies. I hope it wasn’t too long or sad of a read. Mommy is so glad you stuck out until the end, but it’s time for you to get some sleep. Let me know what you think in the morning 🤭

Goodnight sweethearts 💗

[azrielgreen]

Hellooo I have a writing question if that’s okay. 💜

Basically, whenever I write anything I always project onto the characters, and this makes them all seem kind of the same. All anxious, worried, insecure, etc. I know some of that is okay and what makes a work unique, but I feel a lack of control over my stories because of this. Like the characters run away from me and the narrative gets weighed down by my own thoughts and feelings instead of the characters’.

I’ve read all your stories and see that you have a strong idea of who characters are and how far you can take them. Like, you even know the varying degrees a story can fuck a reader up, and how fucked up a certain character is. Steve’s variances from YD to BOD and now Rooms most notably.

I know your main thing is to make sure you have a sun and moon fic so you can channel out dark emotions and not muddle up your happier stories/scenes with this “negativity”.

But I was wondering if you’d be able to give any other advice on maintaining a stronger grip on both the narrative and the characters, and adding your own unique perspective/personality to the story without overdoing it. Even the way you’re able to control your chapter word count so they’re all around the same length. I find my stories start off with lower word counts and as I get into it, my word count explodes. Is there any way to avoid this? You’ve said before to work in batches of 20-30k. But I find when I start a story I don’t have that in me yet. Like I’m kind of directionless.

Ahhh this is a lot of fucking questions lmao. I’m sorry!! I’d really appreciate if you could even answer one of them. 💜💜 Thank you!!

Hello lovely, I'm sorry this took forever to answer, I've had so many of these and wanted to give yours a really full answer💜💕✨️

These are such valid questions!

So, to begin with, looking at characters and how we express ourselves through them. What i do is usually to choose one character I mainly identify with (Steve, usually) and allow myself to express my needs through this character. Through the other, I express my giving side. What I would loved to have given myself when I was younger etc... Through the villain, i write my fears and my experiences.

So essentially you're splitting pieces of yourself into the characters like light through a prism. It helps to write backstory for each one sometimes too. I tend to go in blind but there's always a unique sense of how they're formed from past experiences.

Self expression through characters can be difficult but it does help to compartmentalise and let certain pieces of yourself only go to one character. If you're drawn to writing anxious characters who struggle with insecurity (a theme I'm consistently drawn to) then remember to have the other characters respond how you would WANT people to respond to you. Two sides of the coin. The problem and the solution. The seed and the earth.

I do also recommend writing a moon and sun fic alongside one another, because the overspill of intensity and darkness I tend to generate once I'm into a story can creep into places where it doesn't belong so the divide is important for me.

As for unique experiences/personality coming through the characters, I do limit myself here with a degree of filtering. So I would never directly put my own experience from life into the story without some degree of narrative parsing, I.e metaphors, imagery, symbolism etc... and mostly it comes through in tiny elements and themes so it's not glaring to me when i read it back. Where i let myself flow unrestrained is the intensity, that's all me, I'm a very intense person and I don't ever hold back. I also find that reading scenes aloud helps to crystallise dialogue and i also run scenes in my head a lot before writing them.

As per word count, this can be tricky and i really do recommend not posting anything until you've written 25k of it BECAUSE:

▫️in my experience it takes 25k to get the feel of what you actually HAVE here

▫️it gives you space to go back and make small plot changes as you need

▫️it'll train you into writing that length right from the start and massively reward your effort from the get go once you've hit that mark.

▫️it'll show you where a story might lose steam along the way (some stories aren't meant to be more than a pretty idea in your head and that's completely fine)

▫️25k-30k will let you spend enough time with the characters to develop traits, language patterns, symmetry of symbolism, and it gives you time to get to know them.

Many times around the 18-20k mark I'll realise something like "actually no, go back and change that so he's always been very jokey in the face of insecurity" little things about the characters that often evolve deeper into the story than 5-10k and by waiting until you've written 30k, you're giving yourself time to explore and make those changes before it's posted.

This is of course only my opinion and everyone's methods are varied, beautiful and valid.

If you're struggling with direction at the start, which is common, remember that your creative instincts are sharp and getting sharper every day. Lean where you're passionate, try to make it as fun as you can. You have so many stories inside you.

Other things that help:

▫️Dialogue heavy scenes

▫️Time skips/vignette style

▫️Line breaks

▫️Switching POV

I hope any of this is helpful💜💜💜

[gwyns]

I keep seeing e/riel’s say how Gwyn wouldn’t make a good spy because she couldn’t even keep Nesta’s secret, but I’m confused, because what secret are they talking about? I can’t genuinely can’t remember.

I know e/riel’s love to say how Elain would make a good spy/her story is being set up for that. They said in Wings & Ruin she stepped out of a shadow and Nesta was surprised at Elain being behind her (in Silver Flames) that she wondered if she was taking lessons from Azriel or the twins. If Elain was a spy we would’ve gotten something about that in his bonus chapter, but we didn’t. And I don’t think her story is being set up as a spy. It doesn’t fit canon Elain. She wants to be desperately seen and, I don’t mean this in a bad way at all, but no one is really seeing her. Not even Azriel, but e/riel’s will obviously say otherwise. At the same time thought they change the plot of her journey/story. It goes in a circle: she’s a spy, she and Azriel spying on the mortal queens, or looking for dread troves, or it’s the prison/dusk court, or she’ll become High Lady or High Queen of Dusk (but I thought Elain belonged in the NC?🤡), or she’ll wield Gwydion since it’s the twin to Truth Teller, or she’s connected to the Illyria plot/Ramiel. They keep backpedaling her arc so it can fit Azriel’s. They want her to have a choice only if it’s with Azriel.

Elain does have multiple choices, and what if Elain chooses to be with Lucien, or chooses to leave the NC and travel, or chooses to be a courtier, or to be happily single? They claim to love Elain, but they keep tying Elain to her love life. I’ve seen a lot of Elucien’s and Gwynriel’s actually take the time to theorize about Elain’s arc without it being tied to a love interest. Small little bits sure, but they think what will be best suited for Elain and her needs instead of just tying her to needing romance.

And Gwyn actually did show spy qualities during the Blood Rite, even though e/riel’s don’t acknowledge that and instead choose to mock Gwyn over the fact she had to be carried/couldn’t even climb a mountain, however, Rhys also had to be carried. And before Gwyn had to be carried, wasn’t she spying on that beast and got it to attack the Illyrians and took their food? She was also crying and didn’t want to leave Nesta alone. Sounds like a good friend to me. I’ve noticed that e/riel’s have been a lot more aggressive ever since that bonus chapter from HOFAS with Az dropped.

yeah no they're definitely projecting because nesta didn't have a secret? gwyn didn't blab anyone's secrets?? i genuinely have no idea what they're even referring to

yes exactly, if az were giving elain lessons in anything, he would've mentioned it in his chapter. i never saw nesta's comment as "foreshadowing" or anything like that, it's just her making a silly comment on how elain snuck up on her. nuala and cerridwen are very good at being sneaky, duh, so it wouldn't surprise me if elain did pick up some of their mannerisms. they are the closest things she has to friends currently (even tho they're being paid to watch her lol) and friends pick up things from each other, even speech patterns so it's not unusual in my opinion

ahhh i remember the days when e/riels vehemently denied there even being an illyrian/ramiel plot. gwynriels and az fans in general have been saying this since acosf. everyone thought nessian would deal with the growing illyrian problem, since it was teased in the original draft for acosf, but sjm pushed it back and only reinforced that they'll be a problem soon. meaning she decided to have someone else tackle that issue, someone like azriel. they always contradict themselves, how am i supposed to take any theories or analysis they present seriously when it'll just be thrown out the window in 2-3 business days?

i love thinking about what elain's arc could be, it's true we don't have much on her now but it's not going to stay that way forever. i know she'll be tied up with koschei in some form (and unintentionally free him maybe?) and that she'll likely visit different courts before going to the continent to finish the koschei plot. i have ideas for things that could be included in her book, like traveling with jurian and vassa, them picking up briar somewhere along the way and maybe even some forced proximity with tamlin since his court is in the toilet at the moment but those are more so headcanons than possible sjm crumbs lol

point is, elain as a character doesn't give us a whole lot to go off of on surface level but tbh if people actually cared enough to dig a little deeper and use some critical thinking, it's not hard to get a good, general idea of her personality. some people just refuse to put in the effort and reduce her to whiny or flower girl or some other thing

yup! they love to try and diminish gwyn's (and the other valkyries tbh) abilities. sjm showed us how they won the rite, it was through their strong love of each other. that was the whole fucking point of the blood rite in acosf. we knew they were best friends before but i feel the rite only proved that they're sisters, that they'd do anything for each other. minus the constant threats, it was a very beautiful thing. they just hate that sjm had gwyn spy and do it well, because we had az around the same time telling cassian that spying suits him. they know that was an intentional parallel and it upsets them because gwyn got a lot of development they wanted, and expected, for elain

totally lol. everytime we get new information that seems to stray further from their e/riel vision, they go full bully mode and yell at us for our lack of reading comprehension when, honey, i didn't do anything. if you're so angry over what's going on, over what is being set up for these characters, take it up with sjm!! damn, it's not our fault you got so attached to a ship that was seemingly never intended to be more than fuel for the elucien tension fire

[ranger-kellyn]

tears of the kingdom has made me desperate to revisit my age of calamity fic, if nothing else so i can start working on a aoc timeline telling of totk and AHHH

idea musing below the read more, but endgame/major spoilers for totk

i've been vaguely wondering how i would work in the totk story line into the age of calamity timeline, and honestly??? i think it's going to be fairly easy. at least...leading up to it lol remembering to work in all the characters who are now still alive will be the main challenge lol

i hear a lot of youtubers saying that "zelda was a dragon for 10,000 years" but i'm pretty sure that that it was actually way longer than that. 10k years ago was the last time calamity ganon broke out, when the sheikah created the divine beasts and guardians. the founding of hyrule, when zelda turned, was an "unknown" years prior to that.

at least, that's how i'm working with it. when i am working/thinking about anything regarding breath of the wild, age of calamity, and tears of the kingdom, i am not at all considering any of the other games. to me, this is it's own contained thing within and around these three games. (mostly bc i never played any of the other games so i wouldn't be able to draw from them easily/fluidly) ((and yes i figure things that were similar to other games happened, but not those exactly))

all that to say, in my head, this is the timeline i'm working with: ganondorf, the original One True Evil™, was sealed away in the hopes that one day in the distant future, link will rise to kill him for good. (a good chance i'm wrong on some of the "canon" of what i'm about to say, but i haven't fully explored totk and won't for a while but w/e i'm Workshopping) hyrule castle was constructed atop ganondorf and rauru mostly as a way to safeguard that chamber until link could get there to take care of things. i still haven't worked out why the sky islands exist now, because rauru even makes the comment if you talk to him atop the first area with a view of the temple of time, "though in my day, this was all on the ground".

but on my initial descent into the depths of the castle to get back down to the sealing chamber, that whole area of downward stairs that seemed to just go on forever and ever, that i just...fell through rather than walked and dealt with all the monsters-- i kept that in mind thinking about how long it must have taken link and zelda to get down there. i remember in the initial trailer for the game, they had a huge ass ox and cart, so even though they got rid of that, it all still sets the tone that it took them...a while. to get down there.

i thought about it on my second playthrough that i started last night, and really looking around at the stairs and cave walls, and i just...i really got to thinking a little harder than i needed to about it.

i thought about what it would take to actually seal something like that away. it gets a pass because it's a Magic World, but realistically, good god the work that would take. our world 10,000+ years ago was nothing like it is now. we were still what? mostly hunter-gatherers. google says "pre-pottery neolithic B". so like, the world is constantly changing. the tectonic plates are always in motion. volcanoes erupt and make a whole new top layer of soil and earth. tsunamis regularly wash things completely away. earthquakes...fires...drought.........

like. hyrule has at least one active volcano, glaciers, is near the ocean--

if i played with even a few of our real world...whatever...to hyrule-- that sealing chamber probably would have caved in at some point, or at the very least, the stairwell leading down to it, along with the murals, and all the other tunnels and whatnot, would have to be rebuilt...pretty often, all things considered.

it's something i'm trying not to stress about while writing, but it will. bug me. lol i'll get over it

ANYWAYS

back on track.

thinking through the botw -> totk timeline:

i am going with the idea that like...Calamity Ganon??? didn't. exactly. Actually. exist. like, sure, ganon did plenty of damage and razed the land, but like...it was only...a manifestation of ganondorf. a way of pressing against rauru's aging seal.

the "first" time calamity ganon rose, meeting the sheikah army, the hero and princess-- getting defeated by them? that was all a part of the plan. and by that point...the general population??? completely forgot about what was actually sealed below the castle. that's well into the "nobody is to ever go down there not even the royal family--NOBODY". too steeped in tradition/fear/whatever-- ganondorf has been "forgotten" about. their focus is calamity ganon. which, at the very least, they all know will return again.

the sheikah get "too powerful" (probably reminiscent of the zonai's god-like powers--who at this point are probably nothing more than legend). the banishment happens, they seal away all their tech to appease the hylians, things...go quiet.

then, the events leading up to botw happen. calamity ganon rises again, and i honestly...think it was in the plan to lose. extra 100 years or not. 100 years is a drop in the bucket in the face of thousands. calamity ganon didn't need to win. calamity ganon needed to get the castle to fall into disrepair as a part of the final act.

zelda mentions something about if you talk to her on the way down; since the calamity, the castle fell into disrepair. then the gloom started leaking out from the depths.

ganondorf needed the ground to be shaken up enough to where the castle part of the seal would be broken enough for more of his powers to really be able to seep out into the world.

the giant pig monster of calamity ganon-- still part of the plan. tear up the ground. rip up as many of the devices that were set to contain calamity ganon as possible. (it's at least what i'm generally going with to explain what happened to all the sheikah tech)

SO.

with that in mind, i figure the "totk" events for the age of calamity timeline...happen very similarly. only a few years after the initial CG event. the castle was shaken up enough. the castle seal was broken. the gloom will start leaking.

but now thinking more in age of calamity terms. botw!zelda and aoc!zelda are....in my mind, different zeldas. very much the same in every way, but i think it's more of a "nature vs nurture" situation. their natures are the same, but i think they had different nurtures. botw!zelda was not a fighter. she was not the "take up a weapon" sort. she had different shit going on. aoc!zelda is a fighter. she's the one who figured out how to weaponize the sheikah slate. she's the one who refused to stand by while link and impa did all the heavy lifting in the breach of demise. she had just enough differences in her life that she could at least take that up while still unable to awaken her sealing powers. BUT STILL. at the end of the day, they're both ARE fighters, just in different ways. i'm honestly struggling to figure out if aoc!zelda would have the mental fortitude to take on draconification. i figure the whole 100 years imprisoned with ganon thing really is what helped botw/totk!zelda be able to do that.

so while i work through that, at the very least, on my drive home from work today, while sitting in traffic, i just...I saw the opening of my fic for the age of calamity sequel. all because i thought something along the lines of, "you know...that was an odd question for zelda to ask her father? 'what is below the castle'? why would she question there was even something down there in the first place? why would she ever wonder if anything other than like...a crypt or something was down there?? it seems like a very...pointed...question...a question that gets asked if you saw something you maybe shouldn't have..."

in my age of calamity fic, the endgame pairing for zelda is zelda/impa, so. obviously. impa will be going with them down into the depths as part of the first change. (really want to get back into drawing so i can try to explain the "future" design for impa more-- bc i'm loving what i'm seeing in my head. same hair length but braided, at least one new piercing, some more ink-- girl looks Good)

and knowing that, i've been trying to figure out "is impa staying the present with link and everyone else?? or am i sending her ass to the ancient past, too?? if i do?? how do i??? what do i??? do with her????"

as much as i would love some antics with "yOURE CLEARLY NOT MY WIFE" from impa with all the Shmelda's running around in the present...i don't think that's the route i will go. (i could prove myself wrong later who knows i haven't finished the first fic lmao)

BUT SO. i had an idea to completely change up how i have impa and zelda originally met. instead of them not meeting until their late teens, i had this idea of them being small children, right around the time of the death of zelda's mother. impa and purah are the children to the king and queen's advisors, and zelda had been good friends with them all her childhood. (for my work, impa is a year older than zelda, and purah is about four years older than impa) after the queen's death, little zelda had been inconsolable-- absolutely shut down, not taking, not emoting-- nothing. purah and impa are both desperate to make their friend smile again, so purah decides, "hey!! why don't we sneak you down to the secret tunnels! there's all kinds of cool stuff to look at down there!" and what she MEANS is the like. staff tunnels and whatnot that are all around the castle for staff to move about unseen. the secret escape tunnels-- things like that.

impa...was less keen on the idea, knowing damn well they're sneaking where they shouldn't be-- and teleporting around with the princess??? it's one thing to endanger your sister. it's another to endanger the crowned princess--

purah presses her, and when it's the first time zelda has shown any interest in anything since her mother's passing-- impa caves.

so down they go. impa's powers have always been strong, but they're definitely less graceful at that age. they "poof" around the tunnels, going down to the docks, around the tunnels, sneak somewhere where they can probably find the three of them treats. zelda has fun for the first time in...a long time. so impa doesn't really stop. they keep going, and going, and going...and going...

and eventually.

the three of them realize they're...in a part of the castle they've never seen. they're too young to be able to put into words how it's different, but it's a combination of just how stale the air is. the architecture. the color of the stone in and around everything-- in front of them is a huge slab of text. it's ancient hylian-- something only zelda can read a few words of. but she knows the words she needs to know from it.

she grabs both their hands. "it says stay out," she says with a gulp.

purah squeezes her hand, not bothered. "that just means there's something really cool behind it! c'mon, impa!"

impa hums, putting her hand on the cold slab. "i don't know...that's...really thick...I can't poof unless I have a perfectly clear path...at least, not yet."

purah, curiosity getting the better of her, needles her. childish taunts of her being a big scaredy cat, big cucco, bawcking at her until she's red in the face and is just like "FINE!!" and then smacks her forehead "but i'm stealing your energy to do it!!" in a manner similar to what she would need to do to sap energy for symbol clones.

she then is able to get them on the other side and it's....even more different. they're at that huge stairwell. the air isn't stale it's old. purah is too busy complaining about how much it hurt to have her energy sapped that it's a few seconds before she realizes that impa and zelda are both...terrified.

the endless stairwell shaft that looks like it goes down to the center of the earth-- this is where impa's fear of heights starts.

absolute silence between the three of them as they stand near the edge, zelda having a death grip on the railing.

it's so quiet, the only thing they hear is one another's shallow breathing...their own pulses-- they don't have to even see a trace of ganondorf, the sounds of their own pulses echoing in their ears is more than enough to terrify them.

zelda, tears in her eyes, "we're gonna get in trouble--"

holding back her own, impa grabs both their hands again and gets them the hell out of there, wearing herself completely out by the time they make it back to somewhere they're allowed to be.

impa almost collapses, so they all sit together against the wall of wherever, not saying a word until she's caught her breath.

weakly, impa finally says, "we can never talk about this ever again."

zelda nods.

purah doesn't even tease her a little about it.

and so they never do talk about it...but they all never entirely stop thinking about it. zelda asks one day "what is below the castle" and gets that cryptic answer from her father. she doesn't even dare try to tell impa and purah what he said.

probably around that point as well, i'm going to have the king dismiss his advisors, their presence reminding him too much of the queen. they head back to kakariko or something idk. but zelda won't reconnect with them for a long time, right up to the point where they originally did for my fic (so about 5 years before calamity ganon awakens in the game)

my fic goes how it goes, and then there's relative peace afterwards, like in botw/totk.

the kingdom is rebuilding, a bright future looks to be ahead of them--

then the gloom. the gloom that they quickly realize is coming from the depths of the castle. depths that has zelda concerned. she meets with purah and impa first. [i'll probably have terrako rebuilt by this point too] "do...either of you remember when we were children, and we went too far down in the castle? When we found that...horrible stairwell?"

impa wraps her arms around herself, visibly tensing. "i try not to remember."

purah grimaces. "i unfortunately remember..."

zelda opens her mouth to speak, but the words aren't quite there yet. eventually, "this has to be coming from there..."

and from there, they agree to meet with the others, the king is strongly against her going down there, but is eased by the fact she'll at least have impa, link, and terrako with her.

from there. i think i'm going to send impa back to the past with her. i think i'm going to use a little author liberty, and--

in the past, after zelda has committed herself to draconifciation, mineru pulls impa aside. "impa...there is something i must tell you," she says between coughing fits. "There is another secret stone. one even my brother didn't know about." (she's the older sibling--girl's got secrets i'm sure of it)

so impa learns of a stone, hidden away, deep on an island, off the southeast coast of hyrule. on a map, she will recognize it as Eventide Island. in person, it's...a completely different island. much larger, and even more dangerous, fraught with all kinds of trials for her, unlocked thanks to mineru--

she gets her own secret stone, and from there...i have two routes, and i'm not sold on either, 100% yet. the title "sage of shadows" keeps jumping out at me, but idk entirely what to do with that. i could either have her go immortal dragon as well, or...i could have her be the one who teaches the people who will become the sheikah that stasis power they ended up using to seal themselves away in the shrines to later test link for the calamity. thanks to her own prowess, and enhanced by the secret stone, maybe she'll be in a different kind of stasis. hidden away in a shrine of her own making, deep within the depths, waiting...waiting...waiting...

but shadow dragon DOES sound pretty cool.......(I like the idea of her dragon mirroring zelda's perfectly, just in the depths rather than the sky)

idk. that was. A LOT. of word vomiting. all to just be like "this is how much my brain crammed into the span of maybe 5 minutes during my commute)

no clue which way i will end up going. i kind of need to. uh. write the first fic to bEGIN WITH....but still. it's nice to like. be writing again, even if it is just word salad.

[sequinsmile-x]

Hi, I’ve never done this before but I love your writing and love how you portray all the characters and I always get super excited when I see that you posted a fic of any sort.

Anyways, I read your recent fic about Hotch turning 60 and feeling self conscious and I was wondering if you could do another one but reverse it and Emily is feeling uncomfortable or self conscious because she feels old on her birthday or something? Thanks!

Ahhh thank you friend!!! And you can always send me prompts!! I hope you enjoy this!

I got a touch carried away with this drabble (is anyone surprised?!)

-x-

Words: 1.4k

Warnings: negative body issues/anxieties

They rarely had time alone just the two of them. Between work and their children, life was always busy, the mix of the chaos their jobs brought and the normality of their family perfect for them. Happiness both of them once thought they’d never get to experience.

Their time alone was usually limited to after the kids went to bed. Jack often did his own thing these days, the teenager out with his friends. The twins were the difficult part, resistant to settle down at night from the moment they were born, something that seemed to have got worse as the years went on. Aaron and Emily had learnt to take a kid each, alternating between their son and their daughter whenever they were home, convincing their 6 year olds that it was time for bed.

Emily found herself missing her husband despite being with him all the time, which is why when he asked her what she wanted to do for her 50th birthday she said she just wanted to spend time with him. She’d turned down the idea of a party, something Penelope and JJ had lamented, and decided to go out for dinner with her husband instead.

It started out exactly as she’d wanted. Time alone with the man she loved, nothing but each other and good food and wine for the evening. She found herself more in love with him now than when they first got together, a feat she would have once deemed impossible. It was so much a part of her now, loving him, that she couldn’t remember who she had been before it. What the space in her chest had been filled with without affection for him, for their family, sure it must have ached with emptiness.

Things took a turn after their waitress changed halfway through the meal. The young blonde women who brought over their entrees looking so much like Haley had that it takes her back a little. She had immediately started flirting with Aaron, something Emily couldn’t exactly blame her for, but it put her on edge. Her body tensing as she watched this young thing in her 20s smile adoringly at her husband, laughing at just about anything he said.

Aaron was aging so well it pissed her off sometimes. The lines around his eyes making him look more refined, the salt and pepper flecks at his temples that she loved to run her fingers through. He was thicker now, his embrace softer, and she loved it. His embrace the place she always sought solace, her port in a storm.

It felt unfair, that he was somehow improving with age. She often found herself looking at herself in the mirror, lamenting the changes her and her body had gone through in the last decade. Sometimes she wished her and Aaron had been together before her showdown with Doyle, that he had known her body before it changed forever. Other times she was grateful that he had nothing to compare it to, that the scars on her abdomen and chest were as familiar to him as his were to her. The silver lines scattered across him as much a part of him as his smile, as his love for her.

The changes brought by having the twins were just as hard to swallow, no matter how much she loved them with her entire being. Now silvery lines on what felt like her whole abdomen, on her breasts. Skin painfully stretched out to accommodate her son and daughter, never quite all going back into place after they’d been born.

She knew Aaron still loved her, still found her as attractive as the day they had met, whispered confessions against her skin that even then, even when they’d hated each other and he was married to someone else, he’d fantasised about fucking her against the desk that was now hers. But she still struggled, still lamented how quickly the years had gone by, although she wouldn’t change a second of it. Couldn’t imagine being anywhere except where she was now.

She smiles tightly at their waitress throughout the evening, trying her best to not let the jealousy Aaron would always gently mock her for rise up. Aaron was useless at this kind of thing, rarely noticing if someone was flirting with him. He hadn’t even realised Emily had been at first, only getting the point when she’d kissed him, fed up with waiting for him to get the hint.

Any attempts to feel good natured about it goes away the second the waitress puts her hand on Aaron’s arm as he pays. Anger and sadness she feels ridiculous for flooding her at the same time, dampening her mood. She’s grateful that Aaron doesn’t mention it, although judging on how tightly he holds her hand during the drive home he’s noticed it.

It’s only when they get home it comes up. She heads upstairs, popping into the kids rooms to make sure they are ok, smiling as she readjusts the covers around her sleeping children, gently kissing the tops of their heads as they slumber. She briefly speaks to Jack, the teenager still up playing his video games, before she goes back downstairs. She spots Aaron and Penelope talking at the door, their hushed voices coming to a complete stop when they notice she’s there. Penelope says goodnight to them, throwing a wink Emily doesn’t miss at Aaron as she wishes them a good weekend. She pulls the door shut behind her, and they are alone again, safe in the sanctuary that was their home.

“Shall we have a nightcap?” Aaron asks, his hand ghosting her lower back as he moves past her, already preparing to pour them both a glass of scotch.

“Yeah, sounds good.” She replies, not missing the clipped nature of her voice, sadness seeping in.

He turns to look at her, abandoning his task as he steps towards her, his hands coming to rest at her waist.

“What’s going on, love?”

She sighs, knowing there was nothing to gain from hiding it from him. She found herself not wanting to hide it from him, to bask in the comfort only he could provide.

“I just feel…I don’t know. I guess old.” She mumbles, her arms wrapping around him as she leans into his chest, her cheek against his shoulder.

“You aren’t old, Em.” He replies, his hand running up and down her back.

“I’m older than that waitress.” She says as she pulls back, looking up at him.

He does his best to stop himself from smiling, and she loves him for it, but the corners of his mouth twitch with it, his dimples fighting to be on display.

“Is that what this is about?” He asks adoringly, his hand reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear.

“She was flirting with you,” she grumbles, “and she’s your type.”

Any ghost of a smile disappears at that, a frown replacing it. “Emily, you’re my type.”

She sighs, closing her eyes briefly. “I know, I’m sorry it’s just,” she blows out a breath, “she’s young, and gorgeous and probably isn’t covered in scars or had kids.” She smiles shakily at him. “I think I just got in my head a bit, I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologise for. Nothing.” He says firmly, the hand still on her hip squeezing. “You’re gorgeous, sweetheart. I love every part of you. Always have, always will.”

She chokes out a laugh at that and nods. “Right back at you.”

He leans down and kisses her, firm and reassuring. As if he was trying to put everything he felt into it.

“Now,” he says, kissing her quickly again, “why don’t we have that drink, and then we’ll go to bed, and I’ll remind you exactly how I feel about you.”

She smiles widely at him and nods. “Sounds good.”

He kisses her forehead and walks away, and she smiles at his back, briefly distracted by how his shoulders moved under his jacket.

“Aaron?” She asks, her mind drifting back to Penelope’s behaviour from earlier, things she hadn’t thought about clearly with how distracted she’d been.

“Yes love?”

“When is the surprise party Penelope and Dave have organised?“

He stares at her, his face unreadable for a moment, before he sighs and rolls his eyes at her.

“You, Emily Prentiss-Hotchner, are impossible,” he says as he walks back over and wraps his arm around her, his lips against her cheek. “It’s tomorrow.”

[fonulyn]

I've been rereading "and each one of us is a path somewhere" since I was lucky enough to have the page loaded before AO3 was DDOS'd. And I am really glad because I love that fic! I'm not sure if I've commented on it before to say that (and I don't wanna risk loading anything just yet to check/send a comment lol ^>^”) but I still wanted to say that. It's a really good fic! It made the two bus rides I took in the last two days much better, and I could, for a second, pretend that the Residen Evil World still had an alive Piers which is the best part of fics XD

Also I really love the concept in general. Piers time travelling for Leon Specifically (which. I would be inclined to believe that he was only visible to him + zombies if not for Ada talking at him lmao, if only because of the gun shop scene). Though I do love that, in this fic, Ada either just Magic Science Forgot Piers was there (maybe the memories transfer through a kiss lol) or just straight up gaslit Leon about it for no reason other than "I don't want to deal with this," or at least I assume that was her reason. Like. I love Ada to bits and would forgive her most wrongs, but that is still extremely funny to me. Ada, girl, what are you doing.

Anyway, aside from that, I just really love it all. The banter, the soft relationship and how it's building up. And I love the thought that Leon had to internally accept Piers time travelled to him and he wouldn't remember Leon on his own. Can't help but imagine the mix of worry and relief he felt about the whole thing :'3

So yeah, leaving this here to tell you I love that fic and I am very glad you wrote and shared it. Thank you so much for that! <3

so first of all, most importantly: THANK YOU for such a lovely long message!! truly was the highlight of my day. I read it in the morning and kept thinking of it throughout the day, even though I just now got the chance to respond :3 I'm glad hte fic helped entertain you through bus rides too! (and shhhh I don't know why you say ''pretend'' he's alive and well and happy with his boyfriend Leon)

you know I never even thought that Piers could be only visible to Leon and now I'm kinda bummed I didn't because that would've been sorta fun :'D but alas, too late haha. as for Ada, I honestly think she 100% lied to Leon because she didn't want to deal with that pining shit lol. she had a job to do, a mission to focus on, and that crap? not helpful. so forgetting it we are! she 100% didn't even think she was ever gonna see Leon (or Piers) again ever again at that point so who cares if she twists the truth a little bit :'D

ahhh and I'm so happy you enjoyed the buildup! Leon did go through a lot while waiting for Piers to get those memories 😅 but hey at least he wasn't alone in RC, that has to count for something, and they did get their happy ending eventually! even if it took twenty years :'D

I hope you don't mind I published this ask but I really just want to keep it forever 💖 and come back to it when I'm struggling with writing and feeling like none of it makes sense. I have no words to even convey how much kind comments like this mean to me! and help with motivation issues too! hearing specifics what you enjoyed and thought made my entire day :D

(sidenote; this is why comments on ao3 are so important, too, because they're easy to find for a motivation boost! I've had 'friends' who staunchly refused to comment there and just sent me a quick pm somewhere, and the thing about pms is that they get lost :( they won't be findable at one point. on ao3, they'll always remain!) (this is 100% not applicaple here i was just reminded of it 😅 no shade to this absolutely lovely and wonderful ask!!!)

[hotch-stufff]

i’m back here for a 42 hotch angst and give it to me gooood. take out some aggression here.

You Lied

gif is not mine

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader

Warnings!: crying, angst, yelling, fighting, mentions of cheating, mentions of Beth, all angst, no happy ending

Prompt: Angst #42 "You Lied"

---------------

You sat on your couch, sipping your wine, trying not to let the tears slip down your face. You were heartbroken. And angry. How could he? How could he make you fall in love with him, and then do this to you.

You sat there remembering your whole relationship.

The day you walked into the BAU and shook his hand as he welcomed you to the team, the instant spark that formed and only grew from that day on.

The day he first kissed you after you had gotten shot on a case. You were sitting in your hospital bed and he came rushing through. He didn't say anything as he marched across the room and brought into a soft and gentle kiss. That had began your beautiful relationship.

When he introduced you to Jack. Jack had taken an instant liking to you and you began spending more and more time at the Hotchner household. You even had spare clothes in Hotch's room, you had spent so many nights there.

The first time he said he loved you. It was after a hard case. A really hard case. There were kids involved and it just hadn't ended well. But he snuck into your hotel room that night and curled up in bed with you. He just whispered the words out.

"I love you." It had taken you completely by surprise. But of course you had said it back. And he stayed in your arms for the rest of the night. That was the same night you had thought you had found the one. The guy you would be with forever.

You remembered the day you told the team about your relationship. Rossi had already figured it out and you had already told Morgan. He was your best friend and it had slipped out one night. But the whole team was happy for you both. And they were so happy to see Hotch happy.

The day he asked you to move in. He looked so nervous. You had said yes before he could even get the words out of his mouth. And he had given you a beaming smile. You had all gone out to dinner that night to celebrate.

The one moment engraved in your mind though was the day he had proposed. He had taken you and Jack to a fancy restaurant, telling you to dress your best. You had eaten your meal and then he had gotten down on one knee, Jack resting on his knee as he asked you to marry him. You were overjoyed and had tears running down your face as you kissed the man you loved and the little boy who had become like your own.

And then the day you got married. The most wonderful day of your life. Rossi had walked you down the aisle towards him. He had looked so bueatiful. He had tears in his eyes, but so did you. You had a written your own vows, promising to love each other forever.

Turns out forever was cut a little short.

If only it could've lasted. If only he hadn't lied.

Suddenly the door opened, bringing you out of your thoughts. He dropped his keys on the table, set his bag down and walked into the living room. The sight before him shocked him. You were sitting there, crying. Boxes littered around the living room.

"W-whats going on? Whats wrong y/n." You hiccuped as you tried to calm your breathing. When you could finally speak the words you said made Hotch freeze.

"Beth stopped by today." He looked at you wide eyed.

"S-she did?" He stuttered out.

"Apparently you never called to tell her you left for a case and couldn't make your date." You grumbled out, gulping down the rest of your wine.

"Y-y/n I can, I can explain." You scoffed.

"I'm sure you've got a great explanation for this. Why your ex girlfriend, showed up at your door, asking about your date." He sighed, tears filled his eyes.

"Please, y/n I-" you cut him off. You were slightly tipsy, and stood up wobbly.

"You lied!" You shouted.

"What?" He looked into your eyes.

"You said that you loved me. But you lied!"

"I do love you!"

"No you don't. If you loved me, you never would have done this to me!" You paused, gasping for breath through your tears. "Why?!" He took a moment before responding.

"Y/n, I don't know why I did it. I just-"

"Was I not enough?" You didn't even let him answer before continuing "I thought I was. I really thought I was enough for you Aaron."

"You are enough y/n. You are. I love you." He cried out desperately.

"No you don't. Stop lying. You've done enough of that." He bowed his head, sobbing. "You told me when we got together, that the two of you were done with your relationship. You told me that I was the woman you loved. You told me when we moved in together, when we got married. But it was all a lie because I wasn't enough."

"I'm s-sorry." You shook your head.

"Is it the age gap? Is it because I don't want more kids? Is it because we work together? Were 3 years of marriage too much for you? Were you tired of me?" You shouted at him.

"No!" He shouted right back. "Y/n I love you. There is no reason or excuse for what I did. Truth is that I dont even know why I did it. But I know that I love you. Your my wife. The love of my life." You scoffed again.

"Not anymore I'm not." His head shot up.

"What? Y-you want a-?" He could bear to say the word. That word meant he would lose you.

"I don't know yet, I've packed up some of my stuff, and I'll be back for it later. I cant say here though. Maybe after awhile, we can talk. But I cant even look at you right now." He shook his head.

"Y/n no, you can't leave."

"I can do whatever I damn well please. You are in no position to tell me what I can and can not do."

"What about Jack? What am I going to tell him?"

"Dont you dare try and guilt me like that! I love that boy like he is my own son. But you were the one that messed this up! This is your fault!" You needed to get out of there before you broke down all over again. You grabbed your bag and marched to the door.

"Wait, don't leave, please." He begged. You almost didn't go. If he had walked over to you and kissed you or if he told you he loved you one more time, you probably would have stayed. But he didn't do anything and he had made his choice.

"Goodbye Aaron." And you slammed the door behind you.

Hotch collapsed to the floor in tears. Why did he do it? Was it really worth it? No, he thought, no it wasn't.

----------

AHHH! I would just like to say I don't think Hotch would ever do something like this!! This broke my heart. Thanks for reading! Requests are still open, so ask away! Im so sorry if it takes me a while to get to your requests! If you would like an idea of what to request, here is my prompt list, and if you would like to read more of my work, here is my masterlist.

[animatedarchives]

S/O GETS INJURED WHILE FIGHTING

— 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐈 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐎, 𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐆𝐎 𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈, 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐎 𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈, 𝐊𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐎 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐈

author’s note: HELLO DARLING!! yes, of course you can! i’m sorry it took so long but i hope you enjoy it :) siDE nOTE i’m so exCitEd because you are my first anon aHHH i love you so much thanks for requesting T^T <3 also sorry for making bakugo’s one so angsty LOL

Todoroki Shoto

You had just finished off the last of the villains on your side when your legs buckled and you collapsed with exhaustion

“Y/N!” Todoroki’s voice echoed from down the street

He used his ice quirk to get to you in the blink of an eye and immediately knelt by your side, completely forgetting about the villains he was fighting

“Are you hurt?” he asked, grabbing your arms with his large hands, gripping you so tightly with worry that the blood flow to your arms got cut off

“I’m fine,” you coughed weakly. “Just… tired…” you forced out

But it was obvious you were lying by the way you were practically gasping for air

Your eyes shifted to the approaching villains as they closed in on you two

Not even bothering to stand, Todoroki twisted his torso and hit them with a blast of fire

His face was stoic but fury burned ferociously in his eyes, insistent on not letting them get anywhere near you 

The villains crumpled to the ground, unconscious and you smiled up at your boyfriend proudly, forever impressed by his prowess

He turned back to you, anger now replaced with concern as he gave you his full attention

“Can you stand?” he asked, worry etched into every part of his face

You nodded and grimaced as you tried to get up with his help

Suddenly, a sharp pain shot through your ribs and you doubled over, grabbing your side

“You’re hurt,” he said, carefully laying you down on the ground, his left arm holding your body close to his

He gently pried your shaky fingers away from your ribs and replaced them with his right hand

You winced before letting out a sigh of relief, a cooling sensation spreading over your exposed ribs and numbing the pain

You stayed like that for a while; eyes closed as you focused on the feeling of Todoroki’s cool skin against yours

After you felt good enough to stand, Todoroki pulled your arms over his shoulders and piggy-backed you to the nearest hospital, where you stayed the night

The next morning, you woke up to a messy mop of red and white hair fast asleep at the edge of your hospital bed

He stirred as you ran your hand through his soft hair, his eyes tired from watching over you all night

When he realised you were awake and doing okay, he pulled you into his arms

“I’m so glad you’re safe,” he said, relief washing over him

“Don’t ever scare me like that again,” he whispered shakily as he embraced you tighter

Bakugo Katsuki

You gasped for air as a red flower bloomed under your costume from the deep gash in your side

“Weakling,” the villain spat, kicking you harshly in the stomach

A little blood escaped from your mouth as you coughed painfully

He raised his weapon, blade glinting menacingly in the moonlight as he prepared for the final blow

Just when you thought this might be your end, you heard your boyfriend’s voice ringing in your ears

“Y/NNNNN!!!!!”

You watched helplessly as Bakugo blasted the villain into oblivion, showing him the same amount of mercy you received - none

“DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH HER AGAIN! DIE YOU PIECE OF SCUM!” he screamed between blasts of his quirk

He attacked violently, blinded by rage and the will to protect you

He disposed of the villain quicker than he ever had before and rushed over to you, leaving your attacker groaning in pain on the concrete floor

Bakugo crouched down and held your limp body in his arms, his eyes swirling with so many emotions: anger, concern and fear 

“Why did you fight him?! You know you’re not strong enough to handle villains like that yet!” he raised his voice, unable to mask how truly worried he was

Although his words stung, you knew he was right

But you couldn’t help it

“If I didn’t distract him… He would have gone after you… Idiot…” you said through laboured breaths

His eyes widened in realisation; you were trying to protect him

He couldn’t help but feel guilty as he looked at the condition you were in, scolding himself for failing to keep you safe

“It’s not your fault, Katsuki,” you reached up and caressed his face gently. “I was careless.”

He leaned into your touch, a thin film forming over his eyes

“Don’t do anything stupid like that again,” he choked out

You nodded weakly as he wrapped his arms protectively around you

Shinso Hitoshi

Your hand went up to your temple, massaging it in an attempt to reduce the incessant pounding in your skull

You and Shinso had fought long and hard, side-by-side, and were eventually able to successfully apprehend the villains 

Now you were waiting for the police to show up and take them away before you called it a night

As you removed your hand from your head, you stared in shock at your fingers now coated with slick red liquid

“Man, feels great for people to finally recognise me as the good guy despite my quirk,” Shinso sighed contentedly 

He smirked devilishly at the villain that lay tied up on the floor before striding back towards you

“I think we did a pretty good job, huh ba-” his smile instantly vanished as he watched the thick liquid run down the side of your face

He hadn’t noticed it before, having been so concentrated on winning the chaotic fight

“I’m fine, Toshi,” you tried to reassure him as he examined your face closely

Your words proved void as you winced when he touched your face

You knew you had made a mistake

“Toshi, wait-” you called, but he wasn’t listening

His eyes darkened as he slowly approached the culprit

“Did you do this? Did you hurt her?” his voice low and dangerous

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about!” the villain pleaded, trying to scramble away

Having answered his question, Shinso activated his quirk, eyes full of intent to hurt

“How dare you lay a finger on my precious Y/N,” he growled. “I’m going to make you pay.”

“Hitoshi, stop! You’re not the bad guy, remember? Don’t do it, you’re better than that! You’re better than him!” you shouted, trying to ignore the burning pain as you implored him to reconsider

He inhaled deeply, glaring daggers at the villain before deactivating his quirk

“Today must be your lucky day,” he said, face showing no emotion but venom potent in his voice

Shinso walked back and embraced you protectively as the police arrived

“Thank you,” he sighed, kissing the top of your head as he gently pressed the ice pack he retrieved from the officers to your temple

“I promise to always be the good guy, to protect you from the evils of this world,” he vowed

Keigo Takami

You and Keigo made such a perfect team, complementing each other in every way possible - even in fighting

Just as you were finishing off the last villain on your side, someone punched you from behind, sending you flying into a brick wall

The impact knocked the wind out of you and you collapsed on the cold hard ground

“Y/N!” Keigo cried  

Golden orbs ablaze, he fought off the remaining villains with new found strength

One of them sneaked out of his line of sight, determined to finish you off

But Keigo noticed and flew over at the speed of light, kicking him square in the chest

He stood defensively between you and the remaining villains, wings spread out as a protective barrier to shield you from their attacks

You tried to get up, not wanting him to fight alone, but the pain was too intense and your body refused to cooperate

However, your efforts proved unnecessary as Keigo finished off the last one with a bone-crushing punch

No longer in the presence of danger, your muscles relaxed and your body slumped down onto the ground

“Y/N! Are you okay?!” he asked as he knelt beside you, panting from exhaustion

You nodded stiffly, body still weak

He scooped you up in his strong, capable arms and stood up, carrying you bridal style

He held you so closely to his chest that you could hear his rapid heartbeat

“Hold on tight, dear,” he said

He waited for your hand to clench around his jacket before taking off to the skies, flying you to the nearest medical centre

The wind tousled his blonde locks as he glanced down at you worriedly, making sure you were okay

You closed your eyes and inhaled his comforting scent, smiling softly as you rested in his arms

[aftgficrec]

AHHH your open!!! could u please recommend some angsty one shots, I'm such a sucker for those. MUCH LOVE

You didn’t specify a pairing, so we tried to provide a little variety, though as usual most is Andreil. There’s some absolutely delicious angst in the previous recs, so make sure to check those out as well for a good cathartic cry! -F

most of the fics in this apocalypse ask here

short angsty Andrew fics here

Neil cheats fics here

‘Won’t you help me?...’, ‘Voicemails to the Dead’, and ‘Break to build yourself back’ here

‘the gods took them back…’ here

‘one more or one less, nobody’s worried’ here

‘The Eulogy’ here

‘Mommy Dearest’ here

‘Cut at the knees (I’ll bash your head in)’ here

‘Witness’ and ‘there’s a niche in his chest…’ here

‘You were seven’ here

‘inevitably, like a car crash’ and ‘the deal’s done’ here

‘I put the record on…’, ‘Truths for the Rooftop’ (series of 3 one-shots), ‘deadweight has-been’ (series of 2 one-shots) here

‘blood is rare and sweet’ and ‘The roots of your suffering’ here (Renison)

Andreil:

you're in a car with a beautiful boy (he loves you) by blafard [Rated T, 2829 words, Complete 2022]

Neil stirs beside him, long dark eyelashes fanning over his high cheekbones and casting shadows and Andrew longs to see him open his eyes, look at him with those incredibly blue eyes, feel the way they strip him bare with just a single look and without Andrew having to explain himself.

He never has to when it comes to Neil, not like he has to with anyone else.

(tw: blood, tw: guns, tw: implied/referenced violence)

Bad Days by maqicien [Not Rated (we say T), 1129 words, Complete 2022]

He lays on that couch in his dorm room and lets the feeling of utter devastation eat him whole.

(tw: suicidal thoughts)

I love you (and If I could've, I would have stayed forever) by Artificiosus [Rated G, 2102 words, Complete 2022]

"Stay," He says, assertively. One word he says, and Neil wants so badly to listen. He would do anything for him, for Andrew.

Anything, he supposes, anything but this.

---

In which Neil gets too attached to what was meant to be another meaningless pitstop in his life on the run.

you were my almost by fatalescorpio [Rated T, 1226 words, Complete 2022]

Neil never made it out.

Stuart didn’t get there on time. Mere seconds, two heartbeats, one gunshot too late.

:*:*:

The one where Neil dies

(tw: major character death, tw: suicidal ideation)

Four Roses, Neat by fuzzballsheltiepants [Rated M, 2378 words, Complete 2019, AFTG Exchange]

Andrew's a reporter who just hit on the story of his life. Neil is his coworker who might not be what he seems.

I don't want to forget by Greenteacandle [Rated T, 4029 Words, Complete, 2020]

Andrew is a successful exy star now, but he still remembers his first love.

(tw: major character death, tw: implied/referenced suicide)

Neil:

How to outrun the mafia, an essay by Neil Josten by anonymua [Rated G (we say T), 1668 words, Complete 2022]

Nathaniel grows up in the nest but not being able to stand the torture any longer he runs away, leaving his brothers behind.

Years later he reunites with one of them.

(tw: implied/referenced major character death, tw: blood)

The Inescapable Past by Artificiosus [Rated T, 4340 words, Complete 2022]

There were no windows in the room, if you could call it that, the cell, no clocks mounted on the wall, or watches strewn about. There was nothing but him, the chains on his wrists, the creaky old stairs and the door that seemed miles away without being very far at all. No way for him to tell the time, whether it was night or day, how long he had even been there, because by now it could have easily been hours or weeks or years, time moved up and down and left to right, in circles and triangles, it moved anywhere but in a linear way, time moved like it would in hell.

......

A dashboard lighter on his face. Lola on his back. A racket with no one to stop it from coming down on his skull. Knives and a gun and a thousand harsh words, all pointed towards him.

~~~~~~~~~~

Neil's nightmare.

(tw: nightmares, tw: violence, tw: torture, tw: abuse, tw: canonical character death, tw: implied/reference rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced drug overdose, tw: choking, tw: suicidal ideation)

Aaron:

church dog by skullcaid [Rated T, 6773 words, Complete 2022]

Aaron Minyard is extraordinarily ordinary. He's unremarkable, in fact, and a few bad days that lead up to his relapse make him lose sleep, patience, and maybe even his mind in the end.

(tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: drug use, tw: violence, tw: gore)

Least Favorite Only Child by JayJFox [Rated M, 5676 words, Complete 2021]

He should’ve known all along that this was never going to work. When has Aaron ever wanted something and had it? When has he gotten to keep anything at all?

-- Andrew and Aaron fall out during therapy, Kevin messes up Aaron's head and everything feels like a giant landslide. Maybe Aaron just needs to do some healing on his own.

(tw: internalized homophobia, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: alcohol)

Phoenix From the Ashes by veolie [Rated T, 2177 words, Complete 2022]

The fire, that Aaron Minyard had carried, was finally gone. Trying to stay alive, it had burned down everything that had ever meant something to him until there was nothing left.

Aaron Minyard had been destroyed beyond repair.

He knew, because no one had yet been able to heal his illness.

Aaron Minyard had burned out.

(tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: suicidal ideation)

Kandrew:

even if it takes __ years by nanatsuyu [Rated T, 10677 words, Complete 2022, AFTG Mixtape Exchange]

“So… you weren’t talking?” Nicky shifts to lean back against the counter, brows knitting in confusion. “That’s kind of hard to believe.”

“You make it sound like we didn’t graduate over four years ago,” he remarks pointedly. People move on from relationships of all kinds after a while. Andrew’s not exempt from that, much as he wishes. “We weren’t high school sweethearts.”

Not everyone ends up with the first boy they kiss in college after a drink too many and a bloodied nose. Kevin should have asked first, but it didn't stop Andrew from kissing him again.

(tw: implied/referenced alcoholism, tw: alcohol, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction)

Kevin/Jean:

it's a quarter past midnight (and the sirens are mending some hearts) by maisy_daisy [Rated M, 6345 words, Complete 2021]

A story with four beginnings, and the one inevitable conclusion for a Raven no longer welcome home. But when it comes down to fight or flight, sometimes all it takes is the first gentle touch in the night to remind you why you have to decide at all.

And Kevin Day’s greatest regret will always be who he decided to leave behind.

(tw: abuse, tw: violence)

The Foxes & Wymack:

where you are by @triquetrine [Tumblr Fic, 2020]

in which the foxes, now much older than we first met them, reunite at the funeral of the man who brought them together in the first place.

(tw: major character death)

[kittydeany77]

My Heart I Surrender

Dean Winchester x reader

Chapter 4

You spent the next few weeks trying to settle into a routine inside Alexandria. The mornings were spent getting ready for the day and checking with Diana if she needed anything done. In the afternoon you’d get a break for lunch and doing as you pleased, which meant hanging out with Dean. He was usually helping folks around the community, or working in the garage.

One night he took you into the garage to show you his project and you were taken by surprise. Sitting in the middle of the room was a ‘67 Chevy Impala, sleek black, and beautiful. Dean said it wasn’t running and it’s too loud for this new world but he wanted to keep it forever. In the evenings, you’d make dinner and usually go for a walk afterwards. The late evening times were up in the air, sometimes you sat on the patio and other times went straight to bed.

“You know something, I’m surprised I havnt had to deal with the psychological damage from that incident last month.” Dean and you were eating some canned soup out on the patio tonight.

“Well maybe you’re brain is still in shock? You’ve been good at keeping yourself busy since then so maybe you havnt let your brain have time to think about it. If it does ever start to affect you, please let me know.” He sat his empty bowl down and put his arm around you.

“I will. What do you want to do tonight? Looks like the clouds are in thick and it smells like it could rain soon.”

“Maybe a puzzle? I think i saw one of those 500 piece ones on the bookshelf, and the dining table is big enough.”

“That sounds great.” You sighed contently as you thought about this moment. Safe in a community with walls and the only danger being people who try to get in, or getting killed while on supply runs.

Ahhh!

Someone screamed in the distance and you froze. Was fate playing a trick on you? Simply because you just thought about how safe you were?

“Get inside, lock the doors. I will go check it out. Make sure your gun is loaded and ready. Keep all the lights off. Got it?” Dean and you ran inside to grab weapons and lock all the doors.

“Yeah i will be okay here, but i wish you wouldnt go.”

“I have to, there’s not many here who can fight well but i know i can.” Dean gave you a quick kiss and took off through the front door. You watched him run down the street for a moment before locking the door and turning all the lights off. You chose to lock up in the master bedroom because technically you could have that light on and no one would know, if you needed to.

Dean was taking ages to get back and you didn’t like being in the dark, literally and figuratively. Who was screaming? Why? Did someone get in? Is dean ok? Is everyone else okay? The thoughts raced around your mind until you heard loud pounding on the front door. Dean!

Gun loaded and in your hands ready for firing, you went down to the front door cautiously. Hoping it was Dean, but preparing for the worst. When you got to the front door you said to whoever was out there one word, “rooftop.”

“The little shack outside the bookstore town where we first kissed and i woke up the next morning to you quietly reading Little Women.”

“Dean!” You excitedly opened the door to let him inside and was so glad this safety idea of his worked so far.

“Good job sweetheart, i knew you would remember to check if it was me.”

“So what was it? Is everyone okay?” Dean locked the door and went to the kitchen, with you following right behind.

“The supply runners are back and Anna’s boyfriend died out there. It was her heart breaking scream we heard. …Diana wants her on suicide watch…” His face was stone still, just staring towards you.

“Oh my gosh! That’s so horrible. Do you really think shes so broken she would do that?” You sat on the stool at the island and just looked at your hands.

“I dont know really, but these folks arent too familiar with what its like out there so they still react and think like before. Diana said its normal for some people to go that far.” Both of you sat silently for a moment before Dean spoke up again.

“Theres one more thing, no ones seen or heard from Eric or Aaron and they were due back last week. From the area they were scouting, the supply runners shouldve come across at least the marks we leave but nothing was there. Obviously we cant hear from them unless theyre nearby and send a distress call or one of them comes back. Its a damn mess right now.” He deeply sighed and kicked back against the cabinet in anger. “Son of a bitch!” He leaned onto the island, head hung low and hands gripped tightly.

This side of Dean you don’t see very often, at least during the months you’ve known him. “Im so sorry Dean.”

Dean stood up and stormed off into the garage and slammed the door behind him. You knew he wasnt mad at you, just the situation happening. He needed some time to cool off and think and it’s not like you could do anything for him. It would be hard to sleep right now though, so you decided to go into the extra bedroom you kept a few things in.

This bedroom was smaller but still quite big. Everything in these houses seemed to be huge. It had a small guest bed, dresser, and a desk. You mostly utilized the desk for reading and drawing. The desk was in front of the window and had a view of the tower outside the walls. Sometimes you would practice sketching it to get back into the practice. Before the world became apocalyptic, you were an art student. You missed having a sketchbook and pencil at your fingertips and you decided to take advantage of this place.

Time was lost as you immersed yourself into the sketchbook and eventually your eyes started to droop as you felt tired. You closed the sketchbook and put it back in the bottom drawer where you kept it and turned the lights off in the room. Dean mustve still been in the garage? Time to check on him.

There was no noise coming from the garage through the door but you slowly opened it anyway. It was lit up and you saw him sitting inside the Impala drivers seat. He didnt see you since the car faced the large lift up garage door. Dean had been alone long enough, so you brought it upon yourself to sit on the passenger side with him.

Dean looked over at you once the door was closed and you found a comfortable sitting position to face him.

“I’m sorry for getting angry.” His eyes cast down at the seat and wouldnt look back up at you.

“Its okay, i understand, you needed some space. You didnt hurt me, i just went to the office and sketched a bit. I just wanted to come down and check on you, make sure youre okay.” You rested a hand on top of his and gently rubbed your thumb across his hand.

“It doesn’t happen a lot here, losing people, but when it happens its really hard on the community. Im just tired of losing people.” He finally looked up at you and his eyes were red from crying earlier, and was in need of some rest.

“I know Dean, i get it. Why dont we head upstairs and lay down. We need to try and sleep, if we dont rest we cant help tomorrow. The community will need us. Come on, please?”

“Okay sweetheart, lets go.”

———

Flashback

“Oh Dean look!” You pointed towards a sign that said Lake 2 Miles Ahead. “Please can we stop for a break there?”

“I dont see why not, hopefully its just us there.” Dean smirked over at you and it made you blush.

As you pulled up to the lake, you saw how vast it was. There were multiple open covered picnic areas and lots of large trees to sit underneath. So far no signs of other people or even walkers. The lake was calm and glistening from the sun. It was a rather hot day so all you could think of was taking a swim in the cool water.

“Race you to the water!” Once Dean parked the car, you jumped out and raced to the water.

“Hey! Thats cheating!” Dean quickly shut the car off and got out to chase after you. Once at the waters edge you started to discard shoes and clothes.

“Come on slow poke!” You shouted as you quickly took off your shorts and shirt, leaving you in just a sports bra and underwear.

Dean skidded to a stop, jaw practically dragging on the ground and he stood speechless watching you go towards the water in almost no clothing. His heart felt like it would burst from his chest he was so anxious right now.

“Y/N, sweetheart, you’re a cheater.” Dean slowly came back to his senses and started to strip down to his boxers. His face was flushed red and luckily he could use the sun as an excuse.

You waded in the water and turned to look back at Dean, he was walking over to you in just his boxers and the butterflies in your stomach started a storm in you. The way his muscles flexed and his boxers hid nothing, it was enough to make you melt in cold water.

“Come and catch me…” a challenge was the best way to get over your nerves and you dove into the water to swim away from Dean.

“Oh no you dont!” Dean quickly raced to the deeper water and swam after you. You both splashed at each other and couldnt stop laughing at all the attempts of cat and mouse chase.

Eventually, Dean dove underwater and you werent sure where he was, so you tread the water in circles. Out of nowhere, Dean came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your stomach. “Got ya! Haha!” You started to kick and scream all while laughing, to try and escape his clutches.

“Ah! Haha! Dean let go! Dean that tickles!” After a few moments you got turned around in his arms and you wrapped yours around his neck as he slid his hands to the small of your back.

“This is really nice, to have a break like this.”

“Lets enjoy it while it lasts.” Dean slowly leaned in to kiss you and this lit your core up like fireworks were being lit off.

You’d just realized you were both practically naked in each others arms and making out. Instantly you felt nervous and excited all at once. Dean Winchester was here with you and no threats around, it really was the perfect day.

———

Midday sun shone through the window when you blinked your eyes awake. Dean had his arms wrapped around you and was snoring softly by your ear. It had to be at least half way through the day, considering how late you both went to bed. You turned over to face Dean and softly kissed his cheek. He rustled around a little but didnt fully wake up. Another kiss to his cheek, and still he didnt wake. This time a kiss to his lips with a little nibble on the bottom one, and suddenly the man woke up. His hands dug into your back and pulled you closer to him for a deep kiss.

“Good morning beautiful.” Dean finally let go of you for some air.

“It might not be morning anymore, but its still good anyway.” One more quick kiss to his lips and then you went to leave the comfort of his arms. Dean of course protested with a childish pout on his lips, but let you go. He watched you dig through the dresser for some pants and a shirt while he stretched his body to help wake himself up.

“We should go check in with Diana and see how the towns doing.”

“Yeah, you’re right on that. I will grab some clothes and meet you downstairs.” Dean was still sitting in the bed when you walked out of the room and you knew why- he had a hardened friend to be rid of. Even after months of being together, you hadn’t hit home run with Dean. Lots of kissing and making out, sleeping next to each other and even some light tease touching, but never having sex.

You heard Dean coming down the stairs and went to greet him by the front door, “ready? I grabbed us a couple granola bars and apples for our walk over.”

“Sounds great, but i really need coffee.” Dean ripped into his granola bar and stuffed the wrapper in his pocket.

“I know what you mean, i was privileged with my iced caramel macchiato drinks long ago.” Your granola bar was already gone by the time you were on the sidewalk outside your house. “Does anyone make coffee here?”

“Yeah i think so, when its found on supply runs. I stopped drinking it due to going on those runs so much. Although, now I’m on sabbatical from runs per Diana so maybe we can ask the pantry if they have some for us.”

“That would be awesome, but I’m sure they dont have macchiato machines, ha!” As you walked down the path, Dean reached for your hand and linked your fingers together. He was determined to show how much he cared for you any and all times of the day. Neither of you knew when it would be your last moment together, but you hoped it was far in the future.

[aotomegane]

TianShan science fiction/feral superhuman being au:

PART 7

*******************************************************

It’s been almost four months since He Tian had been captured to be a specimen in the facility. Over time, the bond between Momo and He Tian had strenghten. The taller guy had avoided pissing Momo off ever since the day he saw how sad Momo could be. And because of that, the other researchers had dump everything that has to do with He Tian on Momo. Like, they didn’t want anything to do with He Tian. Especially the seniors.

But they do have to deal with the feral superhuman whenever Momo’s off his shift and usually, that’s when He Tian started to became…… ‘playful’. Whenever someone he disliked came in to check on him, he would play prank. That’s the only way he could entertain himself. However, Momo made him promise to not scare the other interns because they were all just kids like him. Not kids, but you know what I mean. So, if the interns did come in, He Tian would just stare the crap out of them and looked at how fast they would get out of his room.

Momo had taught He Tian how to tell the time. There’s no clock in his room but Momo said, “You could ask them what time it is or you can try and look at their watch.” It took Momo almost three weeks to make sure He Tian really understand the concept of time. Sure, He Tian knew what day and night is but only when he’s out in the wild. In here, there’s no window except for that small window on the door where he could see the old twat guard peeking on him. The air conditioner was on all the time so he couldn’t really tell if it’s midday or midnight.

He Tian had looked at the small intern’s watch when she came in to gave him his breakfast. The short pointy thingy pointed at 9 and the long one pointed at 3. He couldn’t figure out the minute but he knows it’s only 9. The taller boy remembered that Momo said he usually came in at 12. That’s three more hours. Three more long hours. Sigh.

After what it felt like forever, Momo came in with He Tian’s lunch. As soon as he opened the door, he could see He Tian and how his face had lightened up. And of course how that imaginary tail wagging. “Hi…sorry I took longer to come with your lunch. I had something to deal with just now,” Momo explained. He wasn’t really that late. Well, 1 hour late but now that Momo’s in the room, He Tian couldn’t care less. When Momo’s in here with him, the time stopped and he’d hoped that the time would stop forever.

“Here, eat your lunch,” Momo had placed the food tray in front of He Tian. “I’ll treat your wound after you finish eating, okay?” he added. He Tian couldn’t figure out what but he sense something. He could feel that Momo was not being himself. It felt like Momo’s trying to avoid looking at him. But He Tian shrugged it off and ate. Momo had bring something else today. “I’m on a diet haha. So, I can only eat fruits for now,” Momo said when he could feel He Tian’s staring at him. Still, he didn’t look into the He Tian’s eyes.

He Tian had finished his lunch and Momo was preparing the med kit to treat the wounds. As Momo was taking out the stuff, he felt He Tian’s soft touch on his cheek. Momo stopped moving.

‘Ah shit!’

“Hurt?” He Tian said.

It’s rare but He Tian would talk whenever he’s concerned about something. And this time, he’s concerned with the blue mark on Momo’s cheek.

“Ahhh this is nothing. I fell off my bed last night. So I…”, Momo couldn’t continue talking when he saw He Tian’s face. He’s frowning and his hand was still on his cheek. His thumb was still stroking gently on the blue mark. Carefully not to hurt the redhead.

Thump! Momo’s heart’s beating faster and faster.

He knew. Momo knew that He Tian’s knew that he’s lying.

“Someone punched me,” he said. He Tian had stopped stroking Momo’s cheek. He started to feel mad eventhough he barely understood what Momo meant when he said that.

“I guess I pissed him off and he punched me…but it’s nothing. It’ll fade away by tonight, so don’t worry,” Momo tried to smilee at He Tian to reassure him. But He Tian was still frowning. His invisible puppy ears were drooping again.

“Hurt?”, He Tian asked again.

“Well, I’m not gonna lie to you, it does hurt. But I’m fine. Okay? Now, let me clean your wound.”

He Tian pulled his hand away when Momo tried to reach it. ‘Ah, I’m being stubborn again,’ He Tian thought. Momo sighed. He didn’t want to make a big deal out of this.

“How about this. You let me clean your wound and I’ll let you heal my cheek. Deal?”

He Tian tilted his head. “Deal?”, he said.

“Okay, deal! Now don’t move. Or I’m gonna be mad at you,” Momo faked an angry face.

“No mad…”, He Tian had learned what the word mad meant.

When Momo had finished cleaning He Tian’s wound, he prepared a small bandage for himself. “Here, you put this on my cheek. It will heal it,” Momo gave the bandage to He Tian. He Tian took it and placed it on Momo’s cheek. Slowly. And he closed their distance before finally kissing Momo’s cheek as softly as he could.

Badump!

Both of their faces were now as red as tomato. Momo cleared his throat and said, “Tha-thanks. The bruise will be gone soon. So, don’t worry okay?”. Momo hurriedly take all his things and got out of the room. He didn’t want He Tian to hear how loud his heart was.

‘Where did you even learn how to do that?!’