#aka i saw barbie a week ago and have been thinking about this

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Silly Poll

I want to get some good data for this, so if you vote, please reblog ^v^

[jjuzoir]

Random Kageyama Tobio HCS

Word Count: 1851

Warnings: just... me being in love with a m*n other than masumi 😔 also! these are my headcanons as in,,, what i personally i think he’d be like ‼️ also me projecting my ideal man into him (as if he wasn’t it already 😋)

A/N: i... i love tobio so much it’s literally unreal... i couldn’t wait for a request (i’m still working on the remaining 4 too lolol) so take me projecting my love for tobio >:(

— Kageyama normally wears loose fitting clothes or athletic-style clothing. His favorite go to outfits tends to be a loose tee, some loose pants with an obnoxious Nike logo he swears are super cool but look like two garbage bags sewed together, and running shoes. Throw a hoodie in there for colder weather, even then he still manages to look good.

— He takes very good care of his hair, like freaky good care, because of Miwa. Once she enrolled in cosmetology school and she saw Kageyama use the same baby shampoo from when they were kids she freaked out (if she’d been any later he’d start using 3-in-1) and chewed his ear off about hair care. His hair is super shiny and there’s literally no freeze, he uses nice smelling shampoo and conditioner too. Ugh, I love him.

— He has a very sensitive nose but it gets clogged easily so he doesn’t notice much unless it miraculously unclogs itself and he’s complaining about everything.

— “Eh! Hinata, why’d you smell like a fucking axe bottle?!” “Why does no one say anything about Tsukishima smelling like strawberries?” “Yamaguchi smells like... milk.” “Hah?! Sugawara smells bad-?!”

— He says he’s a picky eater to appear cool but as long as you don’t say what’s in the food he’ll down it. He’ll say he doesn’t like carrots but if you give him a salad with carrots he might even say “it’s the best salad he’s ever had”.

— He’s a hot sleeper, and not in the “oh he’s sexy” type of way. I’m talking, he’ll sweat buckets if he sleeps with anything other than a flimsy white t-shirt and his underwear.

— Might be me projecting my love for bunny teeth but he has bunny teeth, his front teeth are a bit bigger than average (not to the point it’s super noticeable but it’s still something Miwa teased him about), his aunties probably squeezed his cheeks and called him “baby bunny” when he was younger.

— He doesn’t go to sleep later than 9PM, he thinks if he does it’ll ruin his schedule (which it will) and fuck up his body - he’s seen Miwa screw up hers after she pulled a bunch of all nighters in her third year in high school and has been afraid since.

— The type to forget people were coming over and come out of his room shirtless asking for his clean underwear.

— His sister forced him to let her cut and style his hair which led to many questionable hairstyles. Tsukishima is genuinely so grateful to Miwa, especially when she was first starting - he’s got some pictures of Tobio with the shortest most embarrassing bangs ever saved in his phone in a file for blackmail if the need for it ever presented itself.

— Likes pissing people off on purpose sometimes, during one of the training camps he probably walked into the bath with socks on and was made fun of but out of spite he just… never took them off. Said he’d done it on purpose and all too. Tanaka cried out of fear for like a hot minute when he saw him standing under the shower with Iron Man socks on.

— He’s so petty too, if you make fun of him for messing up he’ll remember until you embarrass yourself to make fun of you. And when I say he remembers, I mean it - he can’t for his life remember when to use make and do in english but he remembers when Hinata made fun of him for wearing different socks back on their first year and yes he will bring it up on their second year when he did the same thing what are you going to do about it?

— Probably got scouted for a modeling agency once and began running away because he thought they were trying to kidnap him.

— If he had Tiktok… he would’ve gone viral after posting a video of him practicing, he posted for a while for fun and to flex on people that he was hot but then he saw a comment saying they wanted to drink his milk under a video of him drinking milk and he deleted his account, he can’t buy from that brand for a while.

— He’s got a video of a gorilla walking in two legs saved on his phone for when he’s feeling down and watches it whenever he’s not going well. People think he’s texting his S/O but no, he’s just watching a gorilla walk like minecraft Steve.

— He can’t pose for pictures to save his life, his default pose is an NPC stance with his arms stiffly hanging down and his eyes wide in surprise, don’t ask him to smile or else he will look like a serial killer.

— He’s got a bit of baby fat on his cheeks that won’t disappear no matter what. It’s become a pre-game ritual to pinch his cheeks. He’s also got dimples you can really only see when he smiles naturally but he doesn’t know and he’d get shy if he knew and try covering his face so don’t tell him, that’s a fact he told me so himself.

— Cannot dance to save his life. He’s so long (?) his limb control is non-existent, it appears in game and vanishes when he steps out of the court. He really just bounces on his heels and moves his arms like a t-rex, don’t ask more of him.

— Buys his clothes one size bigger just in case and Miwa teases him saying he’ll need them when he gets old and fat.

— Gets asked out often but always rejects, then has the audacity to complain he’s never dated anyone like he hasn’t turned down half of the school's population.

— Can’t sing. He’s got a nice speaking voice but ask him to sing and he’s out of tone, out of sync, out of breath, and out of the room in 5 seconds.

— Sugawara joked about having him singing as his alarm clock and Kageyama actually believed him, probably sent him a new recording as a gift after he annoyed him during practice.

— Surprisingly funny when he wants to but most jokes fly over people’s heads since he seems so serious most of the time, it annoys him to no end. Yachi still struggles differentiating when he is and isn’t joking because his tone literally doesn’t change at all and she doesn’t want to offend him.

— When he was younger he liked to collect rocks, not even the pretty ones he’d pick the most average, raggedy rocks off the ground and clean them up and tuck them to bed because he saw Miwa play with her barbies like that. Still owns his first rock, he named it “Johnson” after Dwayne Johnson, aka the rock (he’s had to explain it so many times he’s exhausted).

— Accidentally drank expired milk once and didn’t notice until his stomach began hurting and he thought he became lactose intolerant and he was inconsolable for days until he realized it had expired like a month ago - he went on a milk shopping spree and the milk sales that week saw a 20% rise from the last few months.

— Tobio had bad handwriting until he was in Junior High because his teachers couldn’t understand him and had him practice calligraphy, his handwriting is now one of the prettiest ones in the team and he’s the official inker of the VBC posters (as designated by Goddess Yachi Hitoka herself).

— His biggest fear for a long time was getting eaten by piranhas because he saw it happen so often in cartoon shows he genuinely thought it was going to be a bigger deal than it turned out to be but for like a solid 6 years of his life he avoided suspicions puddles just in case.

— Kageyama has a habit of rolling and unrolling his sleeves when he’s deep in thought, it soon made way to a habit of checking his wrist watch (he absolutely has a wrist watch, you cannot change my mind on that) but not actually reading it.

— His nails are very pretty, like most setters, he takes very good care of them. They’re filed down to a perfect length and he puts oils and creams, his hands in general are so nice. He takes a lot of pride in them, you know his cuticles are pushed back and trimmed and he could absolutely be a hand model. Kags’ hands are calloused, he’s a volleyball player of course they are, but it’s not to the extent of Ushijima or Daichi’s hands.

— Talking about hands, it’s probably one of his favorite features on people. He loves holding hands with his S/O and tracing the wrinkles in their palm, being able to interlock fingers with them and feel the bumps in them.

— Mumbles to himself when in thought too! Very nonsensical if you’re not informed on what he’s thinking about, if he’s thinking about you he’ll mumble your name or something like “pretty eyes”.

— Has a very healthy diet, like extremely healthy and thought out. He won’t eat anything too sugary or that could throw off his body, but he does have cheat days (which are rare but exist). He also doesn’t drink much soda or alcohol (once he’s of age).

— Things like smoking are a big no, he takes so much care of his body he wouldn’t even touch a cigarette or be near a smoking area, lowkey paranoid of ingesting the smoke too.

— When he’s older I can see him having a dog and a cat, the dog would be a big dog; if they stood on two paws it’d be the same height as you, he’d name or something like Tobias and think he was super clever and funny, the cat would probably a small cat he’d name Milk (it probably would be a black cat too but he does not care).

— Probably tried baby formula because he heard it was a substitute for breast milk. No further comments on this.

— I feel like he doesn’t listen to music, but if he had to choose something he’d pick instrumental music - not orchestral music or anything like that - but more of a chill, no deep meaning just guitar and piano track. I could see him listening to Shego Sekito or Joe Hisashi on occasion, he might even listen to some 2000’s pop if he wants something to pump him up during training (he works out to Brittney Spears’ “Womanizer”).

— A cuddle-bug when he’s sleepy, he’ll throw himself across his S/O and not move at all, he just wants to stay there and not move ever again (or at least until he’s not feeling like passing out). He’ll like to wrap himself around them and cuddle their neck, he’ll attach himself to their arm like it’s a lifeline.

— In other words, Kageyama Tobio… b-boyfriend material.

[amphtaminedreams]

Paris Haute Couture Week S/S 2020 Plus a Little Jacquemus: Okay, Dior DID Suck (Part 2/2)

Hi to anyone reading,

First of all, thank you! I have never had a post do as well as the part 1 of my haute couture week review did and I am so overwhelmed with the positive feedback. This is probably funny to read for those of you getting thousands of reblogs on your posts, me acting like I won an academy award because I got a couple of hundred, but honestly I don’t expect any traction when I write on here (it’s basically just me word vomiting everything I’m thinking as if people want to hear it aka. mouthing off into what I thought was the void) so if you did read it, thank you! I do spend a long-ass time on these so it means a lot:-)

I’ll leave the self-indulgent ramble there though as it’s probably not what you came for and jump straight into part 2 of my thoughts, starting with Jacquemus. Yeah, I knew what I was doing when I tagged that in my last post. Simon Porte Jacquemus is the man of the *fashion* people right now; I’ve even found myself coming round to the Le Chiquito bag despite my original thought being “well, that’s fucking useless”. I know, I know, technically it’s not haute couture; it was part of Men’s Fashion Week, but it happened around the same time and everyone was talking about it on Twitter, so I feel like I have to include it.

In a way, it kind of reminds me of Bottega Veneta’s last RTW show, in that, especially with the women’s outfits, we seem to be sticking with simple, fitted garments and chunky, more statement jewellery. I’ve got to say I like the styling here a lot more though, and in general I’m a fan of this collection. The collared tops with cut outs underneath blazers are cool and I can’t wait until it gets warm enough for me to not feel dumb wearing my headscarfs like this; there’s a LOT of summer outfit inspiration. It’s not a mind-blowing collection or anything but it is effortlessly sexy and that’s something I wish I could say about myself. Most of us can only hope to look half as good as these models do whilst making the effort but at least Jacquemus is aspirational, lol. 

I also fucking adore this colour palette. I’m sick of neutrals literally just meaning brown and white; the navy, sand and muted khaki is a fresh edition to what is usually interpreted as the colours you’d seen worn by Disney’s Riverboat Cruise staff and only Disney’s Riverboat Cruise staff. And I mean, come on-what is more neutral than typical English school carpet blue.

Next for the whole reason I had to make this haute couture week review 2 separate posts: Jean Paul Gaultier’s final show.

In the best way possible, it’s a lot. I don’t even really know where to start, except to say that I guess this is a fitting last show; a celebration of everything campy, messy, weird, performative, and punk is the perfect send off for a brand whose best known perfume of the last few years is called Scandal. More than anything, the final show represented the range of characters and cultures that have influenced JPG throughout his half-a-decade-long career, the lines that supposedly separate what is “masculine” and “feminine”, “old” and “young” and ultimately art and fashion blurred in the most exaggerated way possible. Sure, there are some looks which are individually a bit messy here but the way they were grouped into almost chapter-like segments meant that when you see them all together, they work. Nods to the patterns and structures that recurred from season to season were sprinkled throughout, from sailor stripes to corsets to the expected whirlwinds of colour. I’ll even allow the wellies in that one outfit; if I can get over bucket hats in Peter fucking Pilotto’s last RTW show, I can get over some questionable shoes here. Middle aged fishermen and boys who liked to pose with monster carp in their Tinder pictures as some weird display of masculinity everywhere rejoice.

Now onto a show that I personally found slightly disappointing: Margiela.

I think this one is a bit TOO weird for me. Like if you’re gonna go avant-garde, go all out. Chiffon gimp masks (I don’t know if that’s the intention here but that’s what I’m getting, sorry Maison) are something I’m not particularly fond of and I’ve never been a fan of the Tabi boots in the first place, let alone when they’ve seemingly been blown up to Michelin man style proportions. I didn’t find the show to be a total lost cause-I enjoyed the colour palette and I’ve always liked that contrast stitching detail, plus the bowler hats are interesting-but on the whole considering how much I liked the last RTW show, this is a bit of a let down. 

The looks I included are salvageable but (I feel mean saying this) there were genuinely a lot of pieces that did just resemble bits of fabric draped over each over with no discernible rhyme or reason, so much so that they reminded me of some of the monstrosities I saw at a Drag Race pub quiz this one time where we had 5 mins to make some garms out of loo roll and then have a team member model them for points down a makeshift runway. 

Ralph and Russo was alright. There were a few pieces that I really liked but again, I can’t help but compare this collection to the last, where it felt like the fussy details of bows and sequins and feathers and the Barbie Dreamhouse palette were utilised with a direction in mind. Here, I don’t get that. As ever, the gowns are gorgeous and I’d pay good money just to try one on for five minutes but as an overall collection I’d say there was a lack of higher vision, which is probably the snobbiest sentence I’ve ever written so forgive me.

As for Ronald Van Der Kemp, I could’ve done without including it to be honest, if it weren’t for the few pieces I’m in love with: the velvet cape, fur trimmed jacket and blue satin dress are probably my favourite pieces here.

So onto a collection I liked a lot more: Schiaparelli. 

The influence of nature from flowers in bloom to insects to the organic structure of the human skeleton is as present as ever, though this collection includes a lot more delicate symbolism than usual. Honestly, the details make it for me; the brooches, earrings and facial jewellery are other-worldly touches to outfits that could otherwise be simple fashion magazine editor on-the-go. That’s not in itself a bad thing! The suits are gorgeous. I mean, I’m talking fashion editor in New York in a power suit yelling orders down the phone while she rushes along with a coffee. A Miranda Priestley in the making type woman. THAT’S a modern take on the divine feminine that Maria Grazia should’ve been going for; our goddesses aren’t women who sit around looking pretty (though that helps too) and place curses on mere mortals anymore, they’re women who get shit done. 

With regards to Valentino, which was also a delight, let me start by saying this colour palette is EVERYTHING. It’s ugly sisters in Cinderella fantastic, and we know those 2 were the real fashion icons really. Other than that, I adore the Old Hollywood silhouettes from the gloves to the Liz Taylor-in-Cleopatra-level-dramatic earrings. Everything is opulent and expensive-looking and pretty much what we’ve all come to expect from Valentino. A strong 8/10.

For me personally, Viktor and Rolf was a standout and one of my favourite collections of haute couture week. It’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea and I know it’s at the complete opposite end of the spectrum to what was probably my other favourite collection, Elie Saab, but this is just my style down to a T, the perfect balance of grungy and cutesy that I want to achieve. 

There’s probably going to be a lot of objections to the temporary face tattoos and I get that, but I think they’re fucking sick. I obviously wouldn’t get a permanent one lest my mother murder me in cold blood however if I did, you bet I would be pairing them with frilly-ass babydoll dresses that you could pick up in Camden Market like this. 

And last but not least (that would be Dior), there’s Zuhair Murad.

Sigh.

IDK, man. Seeing Zuhair Murad dresses on Tumblr and WeHeartIt (remember that site? It still exists!) as a 14 year old was one of the things that got me into fashion, so it sucks that almost every time a new collection comes around, I feel underwhelmed. Disappointingly, the brand hasn’t really progressed all that much since 2013. It goes without saying that the stoning and the embroidery and sequins are stunning and would make anyone feel like a princess but from a critical point of view, I’m just not seeing anything new here. Whereas I feel like Elie Saab, for example, reflected the growing fascination with East Asian fashion and recognition of the supremacy of the region’s street style in his haute couture last collection, Zuhair Murad seems to be stuck designing the same dresses he was 6 years ago. 

To pick one example, the rounded stoned necklines are so outdated that they’ve been making their way onto department store prom dresses for years. I get that it’s supposed to be a reference to Ancient Egyptian style and I respect that, I was one of those 8 year old that was obsessed with mummies and the “Curse of Tutankhamun”, but couldn’t it be done in a more interesting way? It’s Maria Grazia’s spin on Ancient Greece all over again. Now I get how how the I imagine very niche subsection of people who are into fashion and Julius Caesar (okay, so I don’t even know if they still believed in mythology and all that malarky at that point in history but just roll with my comparison here) might’ve felt going through Vogue Runway. Anyway, I hate to end on a critical note and so be clear, these are still absolutely magnificent dresses. If we ignore those ugly round necklines, that is.

So that’s it for this post! If you read part 1 and 2, I hope you enjoyed it! As always, let me know your opinions and feel free to disagree. I’m literally just about to start trawling through all the A/W 2020 RTW collections though I imagine that’s gonna take me way longer to do than this, so I wouldn’t expect that for a month or two. In the meantime, I’m trying to fit shooting a Euphoria-inspired lookbook into my days off work which is looking atm like it’s going to be the end of March, so look out for that, and also a review of the red carpet fashion from this season’s award shows. 

As ever, thank you so much for reading and again, thank you for the reception on part 1 if you were one of the people that read it. It makes staying up til 3am with the jitters seem worthwhile, lol! 

Lauren x

[lexienicoleambrollins]

Save Me From Myself *Finn Balor Love Story* |Chapter 1|

A/n: To whom it may concern I just thought that everyone should know two things. One Finn will not be in this first chapter, but I promise he’ll be in the next one and number two all thoughts will be in italics.

Warnings: None just a few swears 

Word Count: 2136

Here is the first two parts if you need to catch up

Preface

Alexandra

"Today is going to be a weird day", I thought to myself as I limped down the last two stairs of my house. I had just gotten dressed about thirty minutes ago and was now just coming downstairs because I had to wrap up my ankle. I had fractured it a few weeks ago while practicing for one of my shows and ended up falling off of the makeshift stage. The good thing is that nobody such as fans or paparazzi saw it happen so that meant that you wouldn't have to worry about it being all over the internet, but the bad thing is that it still happened and it hurt like hell. Once I got down the stairs I was greeted by my dog Winter and her smiling face.

Winter is a black and white Siberian husky with white eyes and she's like my keeper whenever I'm not well. "Hey, girl how are you", I said petting her on the head. Her smile grew even bigger and she wagged her tail. I limped past her and sorta threw myself onto my sectional couch in the living room and turned on the TV. I looked down at my phone to check the time and also see if I had any missed calls.

You see the thing is I was supposed to be taking a tour of the WWE Performance Center today with my cousin Sabrina

and her boyfriend Colby (aka Seth Rollins)

{A/N: To those who read my Seth Rollins story His Queenslayer this isn't a spoiler. They aren't dating, but they're so close that it fools everyone. To those who haven't read it but are fans of Seth please feel free to, but that's only if you want to} and I was super excited. We would be getting to see some of the newer stars or I guess you could say the stars of tomorrow and also Rae (Sabrina's nickname) was gonna show me where I could rehab my ankle. I'm not sure how I was gonna feel about that because I didn't want to seem like a damsel in distress whenever I did something that was going to make me feel uncomfortable for a bit. Not only that, but we were going to go to a promo class and honestly I felt slightly offended. Was she trying to say that I couldn't talk, or was she just doing it just to do it?

       I had already done this stuff years ago in OVW {A/N: Ohio Valley Wrestling which used to be a territory for WWE} and I'm pretty sure that if I wasn't good at it that I wouldn't have been a multiple time champion. I worked my ass off to earn everything I'd ever done with no silver spoon from my uncle. My parents raised me to be one tough SOB mostly my mom though because she never wanted people to think "Oh she's Vince's niece that's why she gets title shots". So hopefully this promo class was just one of Sabrina's spontaneous acts... or I was gonna cause a scene. In all honesty, I wanted to slap her, but that was just Sabrina.

She loved to be spontaneous and just randomly throw things at you (not literally...unless you were Enzo Amore. Man, she strongly disliked Enzo and I didn't even know who the hell he was. All I knew is that she couldn't stand the boy. According to Colby, I'd understand when I finally met him). If you wanted a surprise party call, Sabrina, you get set up on a blind date with someone you like, but are too afraid to ask out more than likely Sabrina had something to do with it, you wanted to do something at the last minute Sabrina was your girl to do it with you, and if you want to be volunteered into something that you have no say so in really...look no further than Sabrina.

I, on the other hand, was the total opposite of that. I was the introvert who knew how to hide it behind a don't look at me, don't speak to me, don't even breathe near me attitude. So basically I was a badass who wasn't that bad once you broke down her walls. Honestly, I wasn't always a big fan of Sabrina doing this kind of thing. So when Colby who is and isn't my best friend told me that Sabrina randomly signed us up to take a promo class I was beyond pissed.

Of course to my dismay, I had to be the "professional one" which meant that I put on my fakest smile and acted so happy about being told the news. Unfortunately, on the inside, I felt like wanting to strangle her. As a matter of fact, I pictured her being a Barbie doll and just popping her head off. You wanna know why I pictured her as a Barbie? It's simple everyone knows that when Barbie's head goes bye, bye there's usually no way to fix it.

There were so many questions were swirling around in my mind and I didn't know how to take it. Not to mention she wanted me to meet someone there and I wasn't sure why. It's not that I didn't like meeting new people (I mean I didn't really because I was super shy which is hard to believe, but it's just part of life)...it's just that I didn't like being put into awkward situations which I felt she was going to do. It was weird just thinking about the whole thing because for someone who was dating Colby... (I think) she sure did sing this guy's praises. I could cringe just thinking about the things she would say about the guy.

He's a prince, he's hot, he's got pretty eyes, he's not that much taller than you, did I mention he's gorgeous. The list could go on for literally hours and honestly if I didn't have a clue I'd say she was trying to sale the guy or something. Like seriously let me be the judge for myself and why did it feel like she was trying to set me up on a date. I hated that kind of thing and she knew it. It just seemed like she was going to make me hate the dude before I ever met him and of course, Colby was never any help he'd join in on the fun.

I had a feeling that I was going to punch one or both of them during the car ride and I didn't know why. I was mindlessly running through channels when all of a sudden I heard my cat Prince hiss and growl which meant that someone was there that he didn't like or didn't feel safe around. Prince was always like a protector to me and he usually liked everyone, but sometimes he'd hiss at people that would walk by or on his property {A/n: This technically has nothing to do with the story, but my cat actually does that to males who walk by our house that he doesn't know and it's hilarious}. It was kind of funny and sad at the same time because he scared the mailman once and for some reason didn't like Colby. According to Colby, I made Prince hate him which is an obvious lie because if that was true my dogs would've been after him as well and they seemed to adore him.

My Rough Collie Adonis especially adored him...he adored Colby so much that he got excited on him once or twice. I heard car doors open and shut and voices as well which caused me to mute the television that was currently on an episode of SpongeBob. "I'm not going all the way up there her cat is already making noises at me", one of the voices said. The voice sounded like Colby and if it was he was right Prince was making noises at him. "How would you know that he's making noises at you?

The window is shut so for all you know Prince could be saying hello", the other voice said. The second voice sounded like Sabrina, but I didn't feel like getting up to answer the door plus she had said that she was going to call when she had got here which she didn't. "Sabrina I know he's not making friendly noises. I can't prove it because I can't hear him, but I can just see the hatred in his eyes. He hates me and she made him do it", the first voice said.  

Hearing the first voice talk again confirmed that it was Sabrina and Colby which would explain why Prince was currently hissing even more. I'm not sure what Colby ever did him, but there was a strong dislike there and it was kind of funny. I groaned and started to pull myself up from my laying position on the couch and saw both Adonis and Winter standing up to wait for me. I adored those two hell I loved all of my animals just the same because of their amazing personalities. I grabbed my crutches and started to limp over to the door when I heard the doorbell ring.

"Sabrina I swear if I get bit because of you I'm not talking to you for a week", Colby said. "Oh my God Seth get over yourself her cat isn't going to attack you. I mean sure I don't think he likes you very much, but he hasn't ever attacked you has he", Sabrina asked. Sabrina only ever called Colby Seth if they were around anyone in WWE or if she was getting annoyed by him and I'm assuming that he was annoying her. I rolled my eyes while listening to him complain about Prince because honestly, it was getting on my nerves.

Trust me, Colby, if Prince wanted you he would've got you by now. When I was close to the door they ringed the doorbell again. Really can't you give people who are on crutches a moment to get to the god damn door before you start bum rushing? "Shouldn't we have called her like you said we were going to? I mean what if she's still sleeping", Colby asked.

She better not still be asleep. I told her to be up bright and early and to look cute. I want to make sure that she looks perfect whenever she meets Ferg", Sabrina said. What the fuck is a Ferg? "Oh so now we're going by nicknames?

I see how it is Sabrina...now I'm not going to sit with you. I'm sitting in the backseat with my best friend Alexandra", Colby said. I looked at the door and then at the mirror that was near it. Did I really just sale myself out to be part of one of Sabrina's crazy schemes? Also what the hell are those two idiots talking about?

"Fine by me you can run to Alexandra all you want. Also, I'm pretty sure that she's not still sleeping because the blinds are up for Prince to look out. Oh and so you know I didn't feel like calling her have you ever thought of that", Sabrina asked. "Fine, then she's either upstairs or walking really slow. Or maybe just maybe she knows what you're up to and is running away which if she is I wouldn't blame her", Colby said.

Shut up Colby...is what I wanted to say when I finally reached the door, but then I thought about it and started to get suspicious. What is he talking about? What does Sabrina have planned for me? Should I run...is it too late to run and who is Ferg? Going by Colby's words it's a nickname for someone, but who...is he the guy that Sabrina wants me to meet?

Why is it so important? I started to get nervous and my palms felt sweaty. Colby and Sabrina were still fussing outside, but I tuned them out and tried to calm down. It's ok Lex everything is fine there's nothing to be afraid of. I was stilling trying to calm myself down when I heard an unlocking noise which must've meant that Sabrina was using the spare key that I had hidden under a fake rock. She didn't know that I was behind the door so when she opened it, it hit me upside the head and I fell backwards and hit the ground hard.  

To Be Continued in chapter 2 where we'll also meet Finn

If you are interested in reading the Seth Rollins story here is a link

His Queenslayer

[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior 9/11/20 – I AM WOMAN, BROKEN HEARTS GALLERY, RENT-A-PAL, UNPREGNANT AND MORE!

Thankfully, we’re getting a slower week this week after the past few weeks of absolute insanity with so many new releases. This week, we also get a nice string of movies about women that are mostly made by women directors, so hopefully these won’t get lost in the shuffle of theaters reopening.

To be perfectly honest, I went into Unjoo Moon’s I AM WOMAN (Quiver Distribution) – this week’s “Featured Flick” -- thinking it was a doc about ‘70s pop sensation Helen Reddy. Imagine my surprise to discover that it actually was a narrative film with Tilda Cobham-Hervey playing the Australian singer who moved to New York in 1966 after winning a contest, expecting a record deal but only winding up with disappointment.  Once there, she’d meet journalist Lilian Roxon (Danielle Macdonald, being able to use her real Australian accent for once) and Jeff Weld (Evan Peters), the man who would become her manager and then husband. Once the couple move to L.A. with Helen’s daughter Traci (from her previous marriage), things began to pick up at the same time as Reddy starts dealing with issues in her marriage and friendship with Roxon.

Listen, I get it. To some (or maybe all) younger people, including film critics, Helen Reddy represents the cheesier side of ‘70s music. I only know her music, since I was a young kid who listened to AM Top 40 radio for much of the ‘70s, but by the end of the decade, I had already switched to metal, punk and noisier rock. As you can tell from watching I Am Woman, Reddy is a particularly interesting music personality, particularly once you realize how hard she struggled to get into the business with a husband who only feigned to support her after dragging her to L.A. for “her career.”

There were many takeaways from watching Moon’s film, but one of the bigger ones is how amazing Cobham-Hervey is at portraying a woman that few of us may have actually seen perform even on television. I’m not sure if Cobham-Hervey did any of her own singing or is lip-syncing the whole time, but it doesn’t matter because she instills so much joy into the performances, especially the two times she sings the highly-inspirational title song live.

Although there isn’t a ton of major drama in Reddy’s life, most that does exist revolves around her relationship with Wald, who is depicted by Peters as an out-of-control coke-sniffing monster. Those in Hollywood may have dealt with Wald as a movie producer or during his stint as Sylvester Stallone’s manager, and only they will know how exaggerated this performance is. Far more interesting is Helen’s friendship with Macdonald’s Roxon which would inspire her to perform the song “You and Me Against the World.”  (Seriously, if you want a good cry, throw that song on after watching I Am Woman.)

Moon does a great job with the material, whether it’s recreating New York in the ‘60s – often using music to set the tone of the period -- or by framing Reddy’s story with Phyllis Schlaffly’s fight against the ERA, as depicted in FX’s mini-series Mrs. America.  Still, it never loses track of Reddy’s journey and her role as a mother to Traci and slightly less to Wald’s son, Jordan. The movie ends with a wonderful and tearful epilogue, and I will not lie that I was tearing up more than once while watching this movie.

I Am Woman may be relatively uncomplicated, but it’s still a compelling relaying of Reddy's amazing story bolstered by an incredible knock-em-dead performance by Tilda Cobham-Hervey. It’s also one of the most female-empowering film I’ve seen since the Ruth Bader Ginsburg movie On the Basis of Sex, starring Felicity Jones.

This week’s primary theatrical release is Natalie Krinsky’s THE BROKEN HEARTS GALLERY (Stage 6/Sony), starring Geraldine Viswanathan as Lucy, a young woman who works at a gallery who is still obsessed with her ex-coworker/boyfriend Max. On the night of her  disastrous break-up, Lucy meets-cute Nick (Dacre Montgomery from Stranger Things), who later inspires her to rid of her hoarding issues by creating the “Broken Hearts Gallery.” This is a place where people who have broken up can bring the remnants of said relationship by donating the mementos they’ve maintained from their partners as sentimental value.

I’m a big fan of Viswanathan from her appearance in Blockers and TBS’ “Miracle Workers” series, as she’s clearly very talented as a comic actress, but I couldn’t help but go into this with more than a little cynicism, because it does follow a very well-worn rom-com formula that can be traced right back to When Harry Met Sally. Yup, another one.  Much of this movie comes across like a bigger budget version of a movie that might play Tribeca Film Festival, and I wish I could say that was a compliment because I’ve seen a lot of good movies at Tribeca. But also just as many bad ones.

The problem is that The Broken Hearts Gallery isn’t very original, and its roots are especially obvious when it starts interspersing the recently-heartbroken giving testimonials. It’s also a little pretentious, because rather than the real New York City that would be recognizable to anyone who lives there, it’s more of a Millennial woke fantasy where everyone is a 20-something LGBTQ+ of color.  Even so, the main trio of Lucy, Nick and Nick’s business partner Marcos (Arturo Castro from Broad City) do keep things fun even when things are getting predictable.

To be honest, I’ll be perfectly happy to see Viswanathan become the next Meg Ryan, because part of the reason why I warmed up to the movie is because I thought she was quite great in it. (I hate to say it but she’ll definitely need a simple name to remember to make that happen. I’d like to suggest G-Vis… as in G-Vis, she’s awesome!) There’s no question she’s the best part of the movie, but it also thrives from some of the other women cast around her, including Molly Gordon, Phillipa Soo and (surprise, surprise!) Bernadette Peters. (At times, I was worried Lucy’s friends would get particularly annoying, but you’ll warm up to them as well.)

Krinsky’s movie is cute, and while it certainly gets a little overly sentimental at times, there are also moments that are quite heartfelt, so basically, it’s a tolerable addition to the rom-com genre. The fact that the characters are so likeable kept me from outright hating the movie, especially once it gets to its corny and somewhat predictable ending. Another thing I like about Broken Hearts Gallery is that at least it’s making an effort to have some sort of theatrical presence, including drive-in theaters.

Next up is Jon Stevenson’s RENT-A-PAL (IFC Midnight), a rather strange and very dark horror-comedy. It stars Brian Landis Folkins as David, a lonely 40-year-old living with his elderly mother suffering from dementia, who has been using the services of a dating service called Video Rendezvous. This is the ‘80s after all, so it involves getting VHS testimonials from various women. One day, David finds a tape labelled “Rent a Pal” and he decides to check it out. It turns out to be a video of a guy named Andy (Wil Wheaton aka Wesley Crusher from Star Trek: The Next Generation) who David begins having conversations with, but once David gets his chance to have a real relationship with a nice woman named Lisa (Amy Rutledge), he’s been dragged too far down the rabbit hole with Andy’s evil urgings.

This was recommended to me by my own personal rent-a-pal, Erick Weber of Awards Ace, who saw it weeks ago. I totally could understand why he would have liked it, because it’s pretty good in terms of coming up with an original idea using elements that at least us older guys can relate to (especially the living with your Mom part which I had to do a few years ago).  I wasn’t sure but I generally thought I knew where it was going, because David’s trajectory always seemed to be heading towards My Friend Dahmer or Maniac territory. What I liked about Folkins’ performance is that you generally feel for him right up until he gets to that point. I also really liked his innocent relationship with Lisa and was hoping things that wouldn’t get as dark as where they eventually end up. I also have to draw attention to Wheaton’s performance, because as one might expect if you only know him from the “Star Trek” show he did as a kid, this is a very different role for him similar to Seann Michael Scott in last year’s Bloodline.

Either way, Stevenson is a decent writer and director who really pushes the boundaries with where Andy takes his new friend, and it’s especially great for its synth-heavy soundtrack that reminds me of some of John Carpenter’s best scores, as we watch David’s inevitable descent into madness. You’ll frequently wonder where it’s going, but for me, it just got too dark, so I only really could enjoy it up to a point.

A little cheerier is UNPREGNANT (HBO Max), the new film from Rachel Lee Goldberg, who directed the recent Valley Girl remake, although this time she’s adapting a book written by Jenni Hendricks. It stars Haley Lu Richardson (from Split and Support the Girls) as 17-year-old Veronica who discovers that her dopey boyfriend Kevin has gotten her pregnant. Since women under 18 can’t get an abortion in Missouri without a parents’ consent, she goes on a road trip with her estranged childhood friend Bailey (Barbie Ferreira) to New Mexico to get the job done.

It’s more than  little weird seeing this movie come out in the same year as a much more serious version of the same movie in Elyza Hittman’s Never Rarely Sometime Always. That aside, Goldberg and her cast do their best to make this something more in the vein of last year’s Book Smart, although that’s also a fairly high watermark for any movie.

Because this is a road trip comedy, it tends to follow a fairly similar path as other movies where they meet a lot of strange characters along the way, as they try to get a ride after being busted cause Bailey stole her mother’s boyfriend’s car for the trip. For instance, they meet a friendly couple who tend to be pro-lifers who want to change Veronica’s mind, and the best side character is Giancarlo Esposito as a conspiracy theorist named Bob.

I guess my biggest problem with the movie is that it just isn’t that funny and feels fairly standard, but at least it has a decent ending to make up for the predictability of the rest of the movie.

Now streaming on Netflix is Maimouna Doucouré’s French coming-of-age film Mignonnes aka CUTIES, a film that premiered at Sundance and then stirred up quite a bit of controversy last month due to its marketing campaign, but is actually not the pervy male gaze movie which it may have been sold as. It’s about an 11-year-old Sengalese girl named Amy Diop (Fathia Youssouf) who wants to join the school’s “cool girl” dance group, known as the “Cuties,” even though it goes against her family’s Muslim beliefs.  Amy learns to dance so she can be part of the dance team and take part in a dance competition, but you know that this decision will led to trouble.s

Cuties got a lot of backlash from for the trailer and Netflix’s decision to release Doucouré’s movie, which is about a young girl discovering her sexuality, although it isn’t really something lurid or gross but actually a very strong coming-of-age film. I haven’t seen the trailer, but I can only imagine what scene it focused on that got people so riled up, since there are dance scenes that felt a little creepy to me. Other than that aspect of the film, Cuties is as innocent as a Judy Blume book. I mean, how else do you expect kids to learn about real life than movies like this? (Unfortunately, the movie is TV-MA so young teens won’t be able to watch it.)

The big problem with the Cuties is that they’re actually kind of bratty and bullies, almost like a younger “Mean Girls” girl gang, so it’s very hard to like any of them. They’re also trying to act way older than they really are, and you can only imagine what dark places that might led, as you worry about Amy getting dragged down with them, just because she wants to have friends and feel popular.

Despite my issues with Cuties, Maimouna Doucouré is a fantastic filmmaker, and this is a pretty amazing debut, especially notable for how she’s able to work with the young cast but also make a movie that looks amazing. That said, Cuties is a decent coming-of-age film, although I feel like I’ve seen better versions of this movie in films like Mustang and The Fits.

Also from France comes Justine Triet’s SYBIL (Music Box Films), starring Virgine Efira (who appeared in Triet’s earlier film, In Bed with Victoria) as the title character, a jaded psychotherapist who decides to return to her passion of writing, getting her inspiration from an actress patient named Margot (Adèle Exarchopoulos), who she becomes obsessed with. I don’t have a lot to say about this movie other than it wasn’t really for me. As far as French films go, a movie really has to stand out from the usual talkie drama filled with exposition, and though I thought the performances by the two women were great, I didn’t really care for the script or the pacing on this one. After playing at last year’s Cannes, Toronto and the New York Film Festival, Sybil will be available via Virtual Cinema through Film at Lincoln Center and the Laemmle in L.A. as well as other cities. You can watch the trailer and find out how to watch it through your local arthouse at the official site.

Now seems like as good a time as any to get into some docs…

 Liz Garbus and Lisa Cortés’ doc ALL-IN: THE FIGHT FOR DEMOCRACY (Amazon) follows Stacey Abrams through her run for Atlanta Governor in 2018, but it also deals with the laws that had been put in place to try to keep black voters from taking part in their right as Americans to be able to vote. I’m not sure what’s going on with me right now, but I generally just don’t have much interest in political docs right now, maybe because there’s so much politics on TV and in the news. I also have very little interest in Abrams or even having the racist history of the American South drilled into my head by another movie. I was born in 1965, my family didn’t even live in this country until 1960, and I’ve spent my life trying to treat everyone equally, so watching a movie like this and being preached to about how awful African-Americans have been treated in parts of the South for hundreds of years, I’m just not really sure what I’m supposed to do about it here in New York. I guess my biggest problem with All-In, which is a perfectly fine and well-made doc – as would be expected from Garbus – is that it lacks focus, and it seems to be all over the place in terms of what it’s trying to say… and I’m not even sure what it is trying to say, nor did I have the patience to find out. I thought Slay the Dragon handled the issues with gerrymandering far better, and I think I would have preferred a movie that ONLY focused on Abrams and her life and political career than trying to make a bigger statement. All-In will open at a few drive-ins (tonight!) and then will be on Amazon Prime on September 18.

I was similarly mixed on Jeff Orlwosky’s doc, THE SOCIAL DILEMMA, which debuted on Netflix this week. This one looks at the addiction people have for social media apps like Facebook and Twitter, and how the information of what people watch and click on is collected into a database that’s sold to the highest bidder. Basically, it’s your worst fears about social media come to life, but my issue with this one is that the filmmaker decided to hire actors to dramatize parts of the movie, showing one family dealing with social media and phone addiction, which seemed like an odd but probably necessary decision other than the fact that the topic is so nerdy and so over my head that maybe it was necessary to illustrate what’s being explained by programmers. Again, not a terrible doc, just not something I had very little interest in even if it is an important subject (and I’m probably spending too much on social media and essentially more of the problem than the solution).

I saw S. Leo Chiang and Yang Sun’s doc OUR TIME MACHINE at Tribeca last year, and I quite liked it. It follows influential Chinese artist Ma Liang (Maleonn) who collaborates with his Peking Opera director father Ma Ke, who is suffering from Alzheimer’s, on an elaborate and ambitious project called “Papa’s Time Machine” using life-sized mechanical puppets. I don’t have a ton to say about the movie but it’s a nice look into the Chinese culture and traditions and how the country and art itself has changed between two generations.

One doc I missed last week but will be available digitally this week is Michael Paszt’s Nail in the Coffin: The Fall and Rise of Vampiro about semi-retired professional wrestler Ian Hodgkinson aka Vampiro, who is a Lucha Libre legend.

There’s a lot of other stuff on Netflix this week, including THE BABYSITTER: KILLER QUEEN, the sequel to the Samara Weaving-starring horror-thriller, again co-written and directed by McG (Charlies Angels: Full Throttle). This one stars Bella Thorne, Leslie Bibb and Ken Marino, as it follows Judah Lewis’ Cole after surviving the satanic blood cult from the first movie.

I don’t know nearly as much about the British comedy series The Duchess, other than it stars comedian Katherine Ryan as a single mother juggling a bunch of things. Julie and the Phantoms is Netflix’s latest attempt to be the Disney channel with a movie about a young girl named Julie (Madison Reyes) who decides to start a band with a group of ghosts (hence the title). It’s even from Kenny Laguna, who is best known for the Disney Channel’s biggest hits High School Musical and The Descendants.

Other stuff to look out for this week include Kevin Del Principe’s thriller Up on the Glass (Gravitas Ventures), which is now available On Demand, digital and Blu-Ray; the Russian dogs doc Space Dogs (Icarus Films) – available via Alamo on Demand; Phil Wall’s doc The Standard  (Gravitas Ventures), and Andrei Bowden-Schwartz, Gina O’Brien’s tennis comedy All-In (on Amazon Prime and VOD/Digital) and Sam B. Jones’ Red White and Wasted (Dark Star Pictures).

Next week, more movies not in theaters!

By the way, if you read this week’s column and have bothered to read this far down, feel free to drop me some thoughts at Edward dot Douglas at Gmail dot Com or drop me a note or tweet on Twitter. I love hearing from readers … honest!

[thepennydarling]

Happy HUUUUUMP Day, ya’ll!

Preston and I have had a VERY busy…month, actually, and it’s not slowing down anytime soon! Phew! Lots of work and things to do!

This is a VERY exciting Wednesday, if you didn’t know it!

My 27th birthday is next Thursday, May 23rd! And I am excited and a little nervous!

So I’ve teamed up to giveaway over $1,000 of giveaways with some of my favorite places to shop, my most requested items, and more! We’ve got Vermont Teddy Bear Factory, ModCloth, Unique Vintage, and more!

However, this is a SUPER exciting week (starting today!) with you all!

Let’s talk about the ruuuules!

Let me just sneak the boring stuff so we can get to the goods! Check me out on Instagram here!  I also have a selling Instagram page where I sell some of my old clothes/styles so that I don’t drown in my own wardrobe. I just listed a few new things – so check that out!

HOW TO ENTER:

All giveaways will take place on Instagram between 5/16 and 5/22.

Winners will be randomly selected & all be announced on 5/24.

You follow me, like the pic, & tag two besties to enter EACH post!

Each Instagram post is a DIFFERENT giveaway and will be listed in the description!

Follow the company who is sponsoring the giveaway! (they will be tagged!)

EXTRA ENTRIES OPPORTUNITIES

Throughout the week there will be LOTS of opportunities for extra entries! Keep posted to my Instagram stories, blog posts, and Facebook for announcing opportunities!

For extra entries ANY day, like & follow All-In-One Company on Instagram and comment your fave animal emoji!

For double entries ANY day, like & follow the shops listed at the bottom of this page!

  I’m kicking off this birthday week with a totally gorgeous tea party, hosted by Bigelow Tea!

Ya’ll know how much ya girl loves tea. I love it hot, iced, and spilled! Ha! So obvi, I knew I wanted to have a birthday tea party with Bigelow! I love to put peppermint tea bags in my water bottles for a refreshing twist, sleepytime tea for relaxing, or even sharing English Breakfast (Preston’s fave!) with him!

Check out Bigelow Tea on Social Media! You can check them out on Facebook here, and you can sip on over to the ‘gram to follow Bigelow here!

Bonus:

This skirt was CUSTOM designed by the INCREDIBLE Rachel Gray of Wishes & Wardrobes to look like the style icon: MINNIE MOUSE for the Surprise Celebration in Disney! Rachel makes totally custom and Disney Inspired garments!

Check Wishes & Wardrobes out on social media!  Instagram & Etsy  (double bonus: her Insta is TOTALLY adorable!)

Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse don new outfits bursting with color to commemorate 90 years of magic in celebrations across Disney Parks. Beginning in January 2019 at the Disneyland Resort in Anaheim, Calif., guests are invited to Get Your Ears On – A Mickey and Minnie Celebration. The special party will feature new entertainment and decor at Disneyland park, plus limited-time food and beverage offerings and festive merchandise available throughout the resort. (Richard Harbaugh/Disneyland Resort)

  Giveaway #1: All-in-One Company

The All-in-One Company is a wonderful company & is our sponsor of the week! They make custom onesies for ALL bodies & EVERY body. One of their motto’s is that no one is different, but everyone is unique!

They prove their commitment to that motto with everything from custom fabric type (I’m more of a jersey than a fleece gal), patterns, pockets, ears, tails, and a million other perfect details! The All-in-One Company utilizes custom sizing, suggested sizing (from newborn to 5XL). Preston & I already have PERFECT onesies (that we look adorable in, BTW!).

These onesies are the most Snuggletastic delight to grace the Darling household since Charlie! They’re handmade by the The All-in-One Company team in the UK! Find out more about their story here!

FOLLOW THE ALL-IN-ONE COMPANY ON SOCIAL MEDIA

FACEBOOK INSTAGRAM TWITTER YOUTUBE WEBSITE

  Giveaway #2: Harvey’s of California

For this giveaway, I’ll be gifting one of these adorable Toy Story bags featuring the Pizza Planet aliens! This Harvey’s of California signature seat belt bag is a total exclusive!

These little alien guys were my favorite characters in Toy Story growing up (and my mom’s too!), so when I saw that Harvey’s had a new line inspired by Disney’s Toy Story, I knew I HAD to have one (and Harvey’s gifted me a second one to giveaway!). Shop the rest of this line here, partner!

Check out Harvey’s on Social Media

Facebook Instagram

  Giveaway #3: $200 ModCloth Gift Card

Ya’ll know that ModCloth are MY PEOPLE! ModCloth is actually what started my fashion obsession about five years ago! If I were Citizen Kane, ModCloth would be my rosebud. Ha!

ModCloth is a size inclusive, retro-inspired, & quirky clothing company is a total gem for finding about half my wardrobe! The total unique prints (both made in house & stockists of smaller boutique labels!) has something for every body from XXS-4X (or 0-30 approx.).

Check out ModCloth on social media here:

Facebook Instagram Twitter

Giveaway #4: $150 Curvy Couture Intimates Gift Card

So I wear a 44G cup. (is that TMI? I don’t care). It’s a big freaking bra. it has provided a never-ending amount of stress in my life. My bras are ALWAYS expensive, ALWAYS in boring colors, ALWAYS marketed to ‘slim’ me, and always a little uncomfortable somewhere.

When I found Curvy Couture – all of their bras WERE UNDER $60 (a thing that has literally never once happened to me). with some even being under $50, available in a millions colors and fabric types, and with an EXTENSIVELY awesome size selection!

Bonus: I have a promo code: ABBY20 for 20% your whole order! Baller. (so theoretically you could get a new bra for like $35) Shop my dusty rose set here!

Check out Curvy Couture on Social Media: 

Facebook Twitter Instagram

  Giveaway #5: $150 Unique Vintage Giveaway

This vintage inspired & size inclusive site is a RETRO dream! Unique Vintage has sizes XS-5x (with new size charts, if you haven’t checked it out!).

Unique Vintage has their site divided into ERA! How cool is that? They go from 1920’s-1970’s inspired clothing! I have pieces from almost every era-inspired line! Bonus: not only does Unique Vintage have adorable pieces & an exclusive label, but they also have exclusive collabs with brands like Disney, Barbie, & Pantone!

Check out Unique Vintage on Social Media

Facebook Twitter Instagram

  Giveaway #6: Vermont Teddy Bear Factory Hunka Love

Ya’ll know how much I lovelovelove The Professor….aka, my SIX FOOT TEDDY BEAR! He’s such a cute and spoopy addition to our home and he came all the way from the Vermont Teddy Bear Factory to live with us!He’s so soft, comfy, and cute and definitely a conversation starter!

Vermont Teddy Bear Factory, in Burlington, Vermont, is a place that makes handcrafted bears with love and care in every stitch!

For this giveaway, I’ll be giving away a 4′ Big Hunka Love® Bear from the Vermont Teddy Bear Factory. Your new friend will be a liiiiiiittle smaller than my bear, but equally as cuddly and fun!

Check out VTB on Social Media!

Facebook Twitter Instagram

  Giveaway #7: $150 Avenue Gift Card

Avenue is, as ya’ll know, one of my FAVE places to shop…because I like everything! I have work out gear, shoes, bras, panties, dresses, skirts, swimsuits, blouses, faux leather jackets, graphic tees and sweatshirts, jammies, and anything else you can think of!

This plus sized company has a varied selection for all different body types! Avenue goes from size 14-32 or 14-32 and is a big range for plus sized bodies!

Bonus: I wear Avenue undies literally every single day. 10/10 would recommend for a friend!

Check out Avenue on Social Media! 

Facebook Twitter Instagram

  Extra Entries!

Follow any of these AMAZING shops who sent me some awesome and lovely birthday gifts from 5/16-5/23 for extra entries for any post!

  Parks & Recs Candle Set by C & E Craft Co.

Ya’ll know how much your girl is totally a Leslie Knope type. I identify with approximately 99% of her quirks, lines, and plots! So these AMAZING-Knope-approved candles set (like Little Sebastian, JJ’s Diner, & Treat Yo’ Self) are richly scented and long burning!

I got this set from C & E Craft Company out of Pennsylvania! Check them out on Etsy here, and follow them on their socials here: Facebook & Instagram

  Recreational Pipes from MudHedz

These totally gorgeous, hand crafted, and adorable ceramic pipes from MudHedz are AMAZING. They are so perfect for some recreational needs and they are totally a show stopper! I got one for a friend a few years ago for Christmas and I’ve been obsessed ever since!

Check out MudHez here! Check out the pickle pipe here & the conch pipe here!

Follow MudHedz on Facebook & Etsy & Instagram

  Go-Go Gryffindor Glitter Candle

I fought it for years, pretending to be a Ravenclaw, but I’m totally a Gryffindor. This House Pride Candle from Geeky Girl Scents. This candle has a hazelnut coffee scent, is speckled with gold glitter, and is long lasting and delightful!

I got this set from Geeky Girl Scents! Check them out on Etsy here, Facebook, & Twitter, & Instagram!

  Check out these games from PlayMonster!

Preston & I lovelovelove board games and I was gifted a bunch of board games and now we can’t stop competing! Ha! (spoiler alert! I’m up!). Check out where to shop these here!

My faves are Utter Nonsense & The Game of Things! I am always laughing like a lunatic when I play these with our game group!

  May the odds be ever in your favor!

Thank you to all of the wonderful sponsors, companies, friends, and family that are making this possible! Be sure to check out the rules, how to get extra entries, and be following me & checking me out on social media!

  *This post is sponsored by the above listed companies with generous gifting as well! Thank you to all! However, all thoughts & opinions are my own!

SO HERE’S THE “END OF BLOG” SPIEL!

If you are at all interested in doing a collab or working with me – please feel free to check out my new Contact Me! page! I also do social media consulting and photography, so please reach out! Let’s work together!

Follow me on Instagram: @thepennydarling

Like my Facebook page here!

Follow me on Twitter here!

Subscribe for updates!

If you’d like to donate to help me keep Penny Darling going – click here!

Comment for topics you would like to see me cover! Like to help my self esteem! What do you think so far? More fashion? More lifestyle? Do you like the mix?

Thank you for all that you do. You are truly extraordinary.

Love all you wonderful ladies (and gents!) out there!

How Very,

Abby

Birthday Week Giveaway Kick-Off! Check out the rules & what I'm giving away & how to get extra entries! Happy HUUUUUMP Day, ya'll! Preston and I have had a VERY busy...month, actually, and it's not slowing down anytime soon!

[artificialqueens]

Sk8er Girl CH2 (Trixya)- Squeaky Pink

Trixya!HS AU. Trixie is a nerdy, girly girl with bows and frills. Katya is a skater chick with scuffed knees and a  Flazéda attitude. When they’re assigned as lab partners, can they discover chemistry together?

Or: She was a sk8er girl. She said see you later girl. She wasn’t good enough for her (or was she?).

[AN: Pink Shrooms aka Squeaky Pink. We’re writing this together but alternating chapters and POVs. Pinky is Trixie’s POV and Squeaky is Katya’s POV. We wanted to write the ending of this chapter based on the actual experience of a friend. The goal was to emulate life it its honest, messy way.]

PLAYING HOOKY

“You have to stop crashing at our place,” Alaska snaps as she throws open the curtains of the trailer. Katya groans and rubs her eyes. Ugh, she can still taste last night’s booze.

“But I thought you liked it when I warmed your couch? Doesn’t it get lonely without me?” Katya yawns as she grabs some cereal from the drawer. Sharon Needles greets her with the middle finger as she comes out of the bedroom in a leather studded jacket.

“Nah, bitch. ‘Lasky and I like to fuck without you a fart’s distance away, listening to our every creak.”

“I’ll close my ears next time.”

“Girl, you live right next to the skate park. So why are you constantly come crawling over to this dumpster?”

“The scenic view,” Katya says and gestures out the window to the pile of rubber tires. Willam zooms past them. Then the whirlwind of a girl kicks open the door, cracks open a can of beer from the fridge, and raises her eyebrows at the three of them.

“So we gonna skate or you blonde fucks too busy finger-popping each others’ assholes?”

“You’re blonde too,” Alaska points out.

“That’s bottle-blonde,” Willam burps. “AKA the dick sucking brand of blonde. Y’all be the lesbian variety.”

“I’m bisexual, bitch,” Katya says, flicking Willam on the forehead and stealing her drink. It’s too early to be drinking, especially on a Wednesday, but it’s not the worst decision she has made this week.

She sighs in relief as the LA sun warms her back, the wind whips her hair, and wheels happily hum against the concrete. Katya’s still a little sore from her fall a couple of days ago, but it’s nothing an early morning spin can’t soothe.

They practice new tricks. Willam finds a new trick and sneaks off into the bushes with him. Alaska tries to ride on Sharon’s back, but they end up collapsing on top of each other, laughing like idiots. Katya smiles up at the blue sky. In the distance, she sees the yellow school bus chugging by, and her easy smile falls away.

“Aw, shit, gotta get my ass to math class before princi-PAL Ru-PAL suspends me,” Willam says and snaps her fingers. “Again.”

“I’m just gonna stay here,” Katya mumbles as her friends grab their backpacks.

Alaska throws a friendly hand over her shoulder: “Can I assssk you a question?”

“Yeah?”

“How are you going to graduate if you don’t show up? I’m surprised that you, pardon the expression, have the balls to skip so much school with that Barbie doll as your lab partner.”

Katya rubs her fingers over the bandaid. She bites her lip as she remembers how gently Trixie had applied it. Sure, Trixie had come off as a bitch during class, but Katya also saw a softer side to her that afternoon. Fuck, then those stupid tampons and Katya had run away…

They’d made Katya anxious. Her? Anxious? Groundbreaking. She wasn’t ready to come out to Trixie as trans. Although she definitely liked Trixie, they just weren’t that close. Trixie was an out and proud lesbian…so maybe being a part of the LGBT community she’d be more understanding? Katya shook her head; she didn’t want to risk it. It’s none of Trixie’s business, anyway.   

She sighs: Why bother, ‘Lasky? My brain’s full of small mice that run and run, but they’re going nowhere. You think my mouse-run brain’s gonna get me to college? Nah, fuck school knowledge. I should just take the GED exam so I can spend more time practicing my skating for competitions.“

Alaska squeezes her shoulder, but Willam gives the back of Katya’s helmet a firm smack.

“Now listen. Stop being stupid, stupid! Teachers want you to graduate, so they don’t gotta deal with yo ass. So just show up and show tits. Unless you have Michelle Visage, then wear a turtleneck. I’m saying this cause I love you, and I don’t want to see you sellin’ that ass on the side of road for a quarter when you’re worth a million bucks. Go to school. Get a diploma. Maybe get head from a hottie. And get the fuck over yourself.”

Katya laughs even as she shakes her head. God, why are her friends so amazing? Even though she’d rather spend the rest of the day here, perfecting her moves at the park, Katya goes with them to school.

Choices.

——

BACK TO SCHOOL (AGAIN)

First period is gym, and Katya’s secretly glad to trade in her helmet for a badminton racket. Coach Santino gives her a nod and tosses her a birdie. Most students think he’s a creep ever since that rumor that he took Violet Chachki to Red Lobster and ate her out, but he seems ok. Well, at least he doesn’t have a dildo wedged up his ass like Ms. Del Rio.

Katya plays a game with Alaska. Their shots fail to go over the net, but they’re giggling anyways. Gym has always been her favorite period. Besides lunch and study hall.

RIIIIIIIIIIIING.

Katya slumps into the back of English class, and they’re reading -surprise!- Shakespeare. More like Shakesqueer, Katya mouths to Sharon Needles. They fist bump. It’s Romeo and Juliet, and everyone groans except for this one girl with grey hair, Max, who’s a little too excited to do assigned reading. Oh, wait, she’s a theater kid, so of course she diddles herself to The Bard.

“It’s the most romantic play of all time! I can feel every line in my bosom,” Max sighs.

Bosom? Suuuure. Katya zones out and looks up a Sparknotes summary on her phone. Romeo is super in love with this Rosaline girl one day and then Juliet the next day? Wow, true love. Katya’s seen this exact drama played out behind the skate park bushes at least twice a week featuring less death and more herpes.

“Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs,” Max reads with a pathetic sigh. Katya wants to stab her eye with her pencil.

Katya is relieved when English class finishes. “If I have to listen to that British girl jerking off to Romeo’s monologues for the rest of this week…I don’t think I’m coming back,” Katya groans as they walk out back to the dumpster. She lights up Sharon’s cigarette and then her own.

“Love is bullshit,” Sharon agrees as Alaska arrives; she offers the younger girl a puff.  

“You have a girlfriend though.”

“Nah, I gotta friend, who likes to fuck. Big difference. Romeo just wanted to stick it in, so he had to get married to do it to please the patriarchy. Worst thing that happened to us gays was when we started getting gay-married.”

“Are you sure?” Katya rolls her eyes. “Are you sure that’s the worst thing that’s happened to us gays in the last hundred years?”

“Ok, maybe not. But love is fake and marriage is an institution.”

Alaska snaps her fingers in agreement and gives Sharon Needles a peck on the cheek. Ugh, for two people who think love is fake, they look like they are going to elope and drive to Las Vegas any day now. They’re that one couple that everyone knows is a thing, but they pretend it’s not as serious as it is. Katya has a That’s-So-Raven moment where she sees their wedding invitations. Gross.

“I mean is capitalism’s corporate dick wedged deep inside our every sacred tradition, including marriage? Yes. Do I still think social equality for the LGBT community is important? Fuck yes.”

Katya and Sharon go back and forth. Katya wishes that school was like this- a real debate. She wishes that it wasn’t always regurgitating the teachers’ opinions for a grade. Then the bell rings and they head inside, but Katya stays to finish. As she deeply inhales the smoke, Katya rubs the Barbie Band-Aid once more. Why hasn’t she taken it off yet?

“Oh, good, look who decided to show up,” Ms. Del Rio deadpans.

“McDonald’s wasn’t hiring,” Katya jokes back as the entire class laughs. Laganja chirps ‘okuuurrr.’ Ms. Del Rio gives Katya a look like drop another test tube and you’ll wish they were hiring.

Katya forgot her lab manual, periodic table, and basically everything at home, so she just slinks down next to Trixie. She hates that her stomach twists up into a knot when the blonde smiles at her. Katya almost forgets how to smile back.

“I scared you off, huh? Sorry…I tend to have that kind effect on people,” Trixie softly whispers as Ms. Del Rio dims the lights.

Katya’s fingers brush against Trixie’s as they reach for their pencils. Katya may not believe in love, but she believes in the way her thighs clench with arousal at the touch. Electric. Trixie’s wearing a strapless dress, which is tight around her breasts, and Katya believes in the way her cock twitches at the sight.

Katya’s glad the lights are low enough to hide her heated face. What? She’s eighteen and horny, and Trixie Mattel is the world’s least likely girl to ever sleep with her. All things considered, Katya would do anything to bury her face between those thick thighs. 

She tries to slow her breathing and concentrate on the video about potassium. Nothing like ions to try and take your mind off of your growing erection. Katya shouldn’t have worn denim shorts this tight, but it’s too late to do anything but squirm in her seat with regret and arousal.

Trixie leans in, breath curling against Katya’s ear: “Did the Band-Aid help?”

“Not without the expert care of my favorite Barbie nurse,” Katya says, trying for flirty, but she kind of stumbles at the end and lands closer to awkward. Curse Trixie and her breasts and bows and brains! If only Katya had that many B’s on her report card, her parents might actually want her to come home. Wow, now she’s horny and anxious? An all time low.

“What made you come back to chemistry?”

My asshole friends.

“You,” Katya promises with a wink.

Trixie snorts and rolls her eyes. She’s so frustratingly superior, and Katya should hate her for that. It kind of turns her on though. Katya likes when Trixie sasses her with a single look, and, wow, thoughts like that aren’t helping with the boner situation. It’s hard -pun intended- to think when Trixie’s around.

“Sorry about the tampons.”

Katya flinches. Ok, erection effectively killed.

“Don’t mention it. No, like, please, don’t mention it.”

“I thought it was weird that you ran, but I talked to my friends and…well, Max has a chronically shallow vagina, and she says that tampons won’t fit. So, I don’t know you or your medical history, and if I somehow triggered you, I’m sorry. Really sorry.”

Thinking about Max’s chronically shallow vagina has made Katya very un-hard. Wow, that’s the first time that Katya has ever been thankful someone un-aroused her. Chemistry class has taken a turn for the weird. Just how Katya likes it.

“It’s ok,” she promises. “I promise not to run away from you again, if you help me figure out how to pass this class. Da?”

“Wait…you know Russian?”

“I don’t just know it– I am Russian. I was brought here when I was six, so I don’t have an accent. Why?”

“Because I want to go to college in Russia!” Trixie whispers. “Please help me, and I’ll reach-around to help you.”

Ok, now that just sounds vaguely like a sex act. Courtney twists around at her lab table and gives them both a knowing look.

“Fuck, yeah!”

Wow, that was not her inside voice. That wasn’t even her outside voice. That’s her in-the-basement jerking off to porn voice, and now everyone in the room is staring.

Ms. Del Rio click-clacks over to them, and Katya wants to cower under the lab table. The woman hands them both a slip for lunch detention. Trixie gasps as she’s given the pink slip, holding it like it’s covered in poisonous chemicals. 

“I see that I have a couple of clowns in my class this year, so let me repeat- all foolishness will earn you a detention slip. If you don’t want to behave, get packing.”

Katya doesn’t give a shit, but Trixie buries her face into her hands and doesn’t speak to her for the rest of the period. The lab is so simple even Katya manages to get it. Trixie’s face is blank, but Katya can see the hurt just under the surface. She wishes that she knew how to approach her or what to say. Once more, she’s reminded of what different worlds they come from.

“Hey, so do you still want to tutor-”

“You smell like cigarettes,” Trixie snaps and rushes out of the classroom, pink slip crumpled up in her hand.

Katya usually is the first to bolt after class, but she goes up to Ms. Del Rio instead: “I did everything! I cursed and came in late and- and please don’t punish Trixie for me being an idiot.”

“You were both talking. You both get detention. Next?”

“No! I wasn’t talking to Trixie I, uh, I was…talking to myself?” Katya stammers and it’s ridiculous even for her. “Please, don’t punish Trixie. She’s trying her best and school is so important to her-”

“Then she’ll go to lunch detention. I don’t believe in special treatment, Ms. Zamo. I’ll see you both in an hour,” Ms. Del Rio says, and her word is law. What is this? Prison?

Katya skips social studies to smoke behind the bleachers with Laganja. She rants about science class, omitting her erection, and questions why school is structured like the penal system. Laganja replies with her usual yes, mawma, preach, god.

Katya comes back, reeking even worse of smoke, and sits a lab table away from Trixie. She bought french fries and milk. Part of a balanced diet. Ms. Del Rio silently grades work at the front of the room, but then she leaves half way through to go to the bathroom.

“Pssstt,” Katya faux-whispers. “Sorry. Hey, are we even on the whole running away from each other thing?”

“Sure. It’s fine,” Trixie mutters, tearing her chicken nuggets in half and opening up her chem notes. That’s the least ‘fine’ fine Katya has ever heard. Fuuuuck, trust her to have a crush on the girl who’s in love with her school work. They’re in chemistry class, but this feels like a lesson in subtraction; Katya should just subtract her being from Trixie’s being. Maybe then Trixie wouldn’t look so miserable.

Katya sighs.

What bullshit did Shakespeare write? Love is smokey sighs? Accurate.

Katya wishes that she had asked Alaska and Sharon what to do. They were the most functional dysfunctional couple that she’d ever met. How did they manage it?

Remedial algebra passes in a blur of numbers. Tick tock. Katya wants to jump over the clock and punch Mr. Davis with a sock. That’s the gibberish that she texts Willam at least.

Suck his cock -W

U say that whenever anyone has a problem. Broken heart? Suck. Broken leg? Suck. Broken moral compass? Suck. -K

If it’s broken, sucking a cock will help. 10/10. User tested and reviewed. -W

How about if u…hurt someone’s feelings? -K

Hurt how? Fucked their mother kinda hurt? -W

Like if you accidentally got them into detention? And they don’t have a dick to potentially suck??? -K

Uhhhhhhhh, lick their clit -W

Metaphorically? -K

OK, MAX. -W

Hmm -W

Try ‘sorry’ -W

Tried that -K

Try it again but this time with your face in between her thighs ;) -W

Katya laughs and sends a gif of a burning hot dog because it feels right in this wiener driven context. She remembers when she came out as trans to her, and Willam was legit like ‘damn, you got the best of both worlds, Hannah Montana.’ Willam never failed to make her laugh.

She arrives at ninth period Intro to Psychology feeling like she’s lost ten years off her life. How has so much drama happened? On a Wednesday for fucks sake.

It’s started to lightly drizzle, and Katya jiggles her foot as she watches the rain streak down the window. Good thing she has a baseball bat, water bottle, and umbrella in her locker. It’s an ‘escape kit’ for a potential zombie apocalypse. Huh, guess Katya’s like Trixie in that way, always preparing for the worst.

“Write down five words that describe you and try to connect those different parts of your identities. Which one is most important to you? In this Unit of Psychology we’ll be exploring ourselves…”

Katya can think of a lot of words that describe her perfectly: skater, chronic under achiever, ADD, bisexual, trans, disappointment—

Disappointment. That’s the word that keeps repeating in her head as she doodles a tattoo design on the side of her paper. Her parents would never approve of a hammer and sickle tattoo, but Katya’s stopped living her life for them. She stopped the day she’d come out as trans ten years ago. Katya had already been wearing skirts around the house since she came to America, but, when she turned eight, Katya gave the middle finger to the world.

Now, she’s eighteen, and her middle finger is still firmly in the air. Her mother, Pat, understands, but her father doesn’t- he never did. He looks at her, silent, like she’s a mistake. Fuck. Katya excuses herself to go pee. She can’t think of words when her brain keeps racing around like a mouse from one thought crumb to the next. Katya stays in the bathroom stall longer than necessary, pressing her head into her hands.

By the time the bell rings, the rain is coming down hard. Katya can only see the yellow blur of buses and the distant green of trees. Alaska and Sharon are making out on top of her locker, and she pushes them off. 

“Ay, this is the thanks we get for letting you stay in our humble abode?” Sharon grumbles.

“Please keep all hands and tongues inside your space while near my locker. This is a 'No Slobber Zone.’ Bitch needs to keep dry.”

“Mhm, that’s not what Willam’s been texting,” Alaska says and raises her eyebrow. “Says you want to make someone wet…with apology tears.”

“Willam’s a Willam.”

“And you’re showing all the signs of being in looove. Sighing? Lying? Laganja told Gia who told Alyssa who told me that you begged Ms. Del Rio not to give Trixie Mattel detention. What’s really going on with you and Barbie, huh?”

“Nothing,” Katya lies and flushes. Wow, it’s a good thing she’s a skater and not a poker player. Her red cheeks are a dead give away.

———

LOST KITTEN

The buses have left by the time Katya rolls outside, red umbrella above her. The pavement is slippery, so Katya forces herself to slow down. She can’t go to the skate park, and, after this morning, she can’t go back to the trailer park. Heart sinking, Katya directs herself home.

Just as she’s turning the corner, Katya sees the saddest sight. Trixie is walking without an umbrella. Her bow is soggy. Her Moschino backpack is practically dragging on the ground.

“Need umbrella? Da?” Katya says with a faux-Russian accent.

Trixie pushes a strand of wet hair from her forehead and smiles: “My knight on a shining skateboard.”

Katya jumps off and tucks her board under her arm. Trixie’s hand brushes hers as she reaches up to hold the umbrella. Katya can’t help it when her cheeks heat up. Her? Blushing? Unheard of.

They walk in silence for a bit, and Katya knows that the events of this morning are still weighing heavily between them. Katya wishes she knew how to break through all of Trixie’s many shields, but she’s…so confusing. Somehow, the more confused Trixie makes her, the less Katya can stay away.

Rain, rain, don’t go away, Katya thinks as Trixie’s hip bumps against hers. You just saved this horrid day.

Katya opens her mouth to say that and then closes it. Everything she wants to say sounds dumb compared to how brilliant Trixie is. Everything might mean nothing when Trixie doesn’t know she’s trans. Why can’t she just say that? Just be the usual middle-finger-to-the-world girl that she is at home and with her friends?

Instead, Katya clears her throat. Pathetic. They pass by the town stores, and she wrinkles her nose at the reek of wet dog. There are too many strays in this town.

“Wait. Did you hear that?”

“What?” Katya stops, but there’s nothing but the rush of cars, splashing through puddles, and the roar of motorcycles. In the distance, she can hear the rumble of thunder. Trixie heads towards the dark alleyway, and Katya follows her.

“Look,” Trixie whispers, breathless.

Katya hears the most pathetic ‘meow’ as she leans down to see a cardboard box. On the outside it says ‘Lucky’s Treats,’ but, inside, there’s the most unlucky looking kitten. It sadly mewls as Trixie carefully reaches down.

“A kitten,” Trixie sighs as she hugs it to her breast. The motherly act makes Katya’s heart twist.

Suddenly, Katya can see the girl who fell to her knees to help her at the skate park. Trixie’s eyes are soft and lips parted when she looks up at Katya. How can one girl hide so much beauty?

“My mom is allergic to cats,” Trixie confesses as she looks up at her with pleading eyes.

“Well, I live in the basement cause my parents are allergic to me, so…yeah, come one, let’s sneak this kitty cat in.”

Trixie’s eyes light up, and she gratefully presses a kiss to Katya’s cheek. It might just be a friendly gesture, but Katya’s toes curl in her wet Converse. God, the sight of Trixie with that little kitten snuggled into her big chest is the best thing she’s seen all day. They debate over names before finally settling on ‘Lucky’ because that’s what it said on the side of the box. Besides, the little scrap of fur is lucky to have found them.

“Shhh,” Katya presses a finger to her lips as she slips in through the back door. They’re tracking water everywhere, so it will be obvious. Still, Katya’s main priority is helping Trixie and Lucky.

They give him milk and watch as he happily laps it up. Trixie’s head is in her hands, face still unguarded, as she happily watches. Trixie tells her a story about how she used to sneak into the animal shelter in the town over on Sundays, spend the whole day there, and tell her mom she was at church. Katya laughs; she thinks that she could listen to Trixie all day.

“Your turn,” Trixie says and nudges her knee. They’re pressed up close on the couch now, with their science homework spread out on the table. Fuck, she likes Trixie so much. She needs to be honest with her so that if Trixie pushes her away, it’ll be sooner rather than later. 

“When I was a little kid, I…came here from Russia. So I never felt like I fit in. Everyone saw some stranger, who didn’t speak how they spoke. Who didn’t look how they thought a- a “boy” should look.”

Trixie’s eyebrows shoot up and she covers her mouth. Then she laughs-

“Wait, you’re joking, right? You mean you were…a tomboy? Right?!”

“No, I…I’m transgender,” Katya says to her hands, afraid to look up at Trixie’s face.

Silence.

Lucky yawns and curls up on the carpet to sleep. The clock angrily ticks as Katya waits for Trixie to say something, anything. Oh god, everything had been going so great and then Katya had to fuck it up.

“That’s great,” Trixie says, face blank. “Great. Uh, I think I have to…my mom wants me to come home…”

“Right,” Katya says, blinking away tears.

Wow, this couldn’t have gone any worse.

“I’ll see you in class-”

“Wait, but- but how about we go over some of the Russian declensions? Or you show me the element symbols again-”

“See you in class,” Trixie repeats, gives her an awkward side hug, and then she’s gone. She leaves Katya shaken and alone. Katya feels like she’s been stripped naked, raw, and then left out in the rain. She curls up on the floor, cradling Lucky to her chest. Katya has already cried once today, and she hates that the tear count is this high.

Disappointment. That’s the word that keeps repeating in her head. Katya gets up, and, even though it’s too early to sleep, hides in bed. Katya buries her face into the pillow and screams. Louder. She can still see Trixie’s eyes, judging her.

Maybe it would have been better if Katya had gotten Laganja or Sasha fucking Belle for a lab partner. Then they could have just failed together. Katya wants to live in a world where she never met Trixie or opened up to her.

The kitten licks her hand, which is hanging over the edge of the bed.

Katya lifts Lucky up and cradles him to her chest.

“There are too many strays in this town,” Katya whispers. “You. Me. They left you in a box. They left me at the airport. I was six. How old are you, Lucky? They also told me I was ‘lucky’ to be taken in by such a nice, middle-class family. Why don’t I feel that way then? God, we’re both so alone, Lucky, so let’s…let’s be alone together? You and me. Just you and me against this world.”

[vileart]

Quarterife Dramaturgy: Yolanda Mercy @ Edfringe 2017

THEATRE (New Writing and Spoken Word) 

Yolanda Mercy, Gemma Lloyd and Jade Lewis in association with Underbelly Untapped presents: 

Quarter Life Crisis 

WORLD PREMIERE 

Tackling heritage, expectations, generational guilt and wanting to keep a 16-25 railcard, Yolanda Mercy asks what does it mean to be a grown up? Written and Performed by Yolanda Mercy Original Music composed and played live by Luay Eljamal Underbelly, Delhi Belly, 3 – 27 Aug 2017 (not 14), 14.40 (15.40) Part of the Underbelly Untapped season, Yolanda Mercy looks at her own life and the lives of the generations before her in a semi-autobiographical, painfully honest piece about being in your mid-twenties all depicted through the relatable character Alicia. 

She wrestles with responsibilities and expectations, tries to justify herself against generations who had a plan by the time they were 20, attempts to balance her London upbringing with her Nigerian heritage, and trying to figure out where the fun in all that is... Alicia is a hot mess. She doesn't know what she's doing with her life. Swiping left, swiping right to find the perfect match. 

Even though she's a Londoner, born

and bred, the scent of Lagos peppers her existence in the ends. Everyone around her seems to know where they're going in life, but she's trying to find ways to cheat growing up and keep her 16-25 railcard. What does it mean to be an adult, and when do you become one? Quarter Life Crisis mixes addictive basslines, spoken word and audience participation. 

What was the inspiration for this performance?

 My cousin was getting married, my friend was having a baby and all I could think about was ways to cheat the system by keeping my young persons railcard (past being 25).  Realising that everyone around me was “adulting”, I turned to my laptop and made this story into a play.

Is performance still a good space for the public discussion of ideas? 

Yes, I really believe that performance is still a very good space for ideas. We spend hours listening to our favourite artist (Drake if you are me), then await the moment when you get spend an evening seeing them perform live with other people who are drawn to the lyrics, beats or energy of the artist. 

I believe the same is for theatre. We spend money to hear the thoughts or messages of an author, who has questions about the world – so places this on stage, with lights, set and a talented team. By doing this, I believe we (writers) offer up a platform for discussion which can sometimes offer a place to empower the voice of people who feel underrepresented. 

I found this when I wrote my first play On The Edge of Me, which explored graduate unemployment and mental health issues. It was astonishing to receive messages, tweets and sometimes be grabbed (physically) by audiences who would say ‘that's my story on stage’. 

I always get taken aback when I hear that, as I know it is not possible for it to be that persons direct story- because I wrote my play in Stockwell and they live in Manchester, but it is very clear to me that the themes within the play resonates with the audience- enough for them to want to start a conversation, seek support (in regards to mental health issues) and find ways to break the stigma attached.

How did you become interested in making performance?

I became interested in performance from watching…. Lord knows I used to watch a lot of people growing up. Be it the spice girls or the Matthew Bourne Company… Yes I love me some of The Car Man. I spent hours learning routines from shows, and reciting lines (from Grease)- all to the amazement of my silent audiences (who were my Barbies and Teddy bears). 

Of course this was when I was 5 years old (or maybe last week…shhh!). But I fell in love with how artists can tell a story through their body and voice. This then led me to pursue the arts further by studying dance at The Royal Academy of Dance, then attending the BRIT school (from age 14), where I learnt from amazing artists about how and why you make performance. 

Is there any particular approach to the making of the show?

I would say that I prefer approaching a show in a collaborative way, because 3 heads are better than 1. I may sit down and write the script, but I share my drafts with my wonderful dramaturg (aka script doctor) Jules Haworth who really helps me to dig deeper and investigate “what am I really saying”. 

Jules is really amazing because she’s worked with a variety of artists independently and through her role at Soho Theatre (so she really knows her stuff). Alongside of Jules, I work with my core team Director Jade Lewis (Creative Associate at The Gate) and Producer Gemma Lloyd – who always find innovative ways in approaching the production, be it working with an amazing PR agent (wink wink) Mobius, or collaborating with a talented sound/visual designer Luay Eljamal. 

All of these people are key ingredients into making a show, as our collective skills help us to create a show which we are all fully invested in and proud of. I always say to everyone I work with, lets make “our” show exciting for an audience, because it is just as much my show as it is there’s.

Does the show fit with your usual productions?

Quarter Life Crisis is my second show, which is kind of like giving birth to a baby- and like every baby they are so different but just as special. Audiences who saw my first show On The Edge of Me, then managed to nab a ticket for our sold out previews of Quarter Life Crisis, say that the shows definitely feel like they are from the same family- but Quarter Life Crisis is way more epic. I think when they say epic, it means the show has a stronger production value as it has projection, set, original music (which makes you want to party) and way more costume changes than On The Edge Of Me. 

I wrote On The Edge of Me almost 2 years ago, and I have changed as a person. I have been fortunate enough to have had more time to invest in my craft by seeing more shows in the UK/international, collaborate with diverse plethora of artists (visual designers, set designers, sound designers etc) and attend CPD workshops which have helped me to grow as an artist. I feel that Quarter Life Crisis is stronger production, as I have endured the labour pains of giving birth to my first child On The Edge Of Me- so I am better prepared….I think….

What do you hope that the audience will experience?

Good question. Well this show really takes you on a journey (without giving too much away). A journey which I have been told is very relatable, but the aspect that people say that really grabs them is the heritage part. In the show, we really get into my culture more….. 

I am Nigerian. So audiences get to experience a bit of my culture, by hearing my tribes language “Yoruba” on stage, learn a bit of my country’s history and also some music (with a slight London twist). I think by mixing the relatable aspect with my heritage, it’s made audiences feel curious about their heritage. 

Discover who they are. Celebrate what makes them unique and questions western societies notion of  “growing up” in 2017.

What strategies did you consider towards shaping this audience experience?

I studied. I studied real hard. I was inspired by 3 people when thinking about creating this show Lusia Omielan, Lady Gaga and Tyler Oakley. They are all from very different mediums. But what they all have in common is their relationship to an audience. 

They truly believe in their messages and find ways to make it appeal to their audience. For example I was lucky enough to see Lady Gaga in concert a few years ago. From start to finish I felt I was taken on a journey which made me laugh, cry and then dance (like ive never danced before). Lady Gaga gave everything she could to us, so much so that she even fell over in the show- but in true Lady Gaga amazingness she got back up and continued the dance routine. 

I remember standing their frozen and thinking “I want to do that” (falling over and all). I wanted to make a show which had a strong message/theme and took an audience on a journey. I wasn't sure how to do this, so I studied Lusia Omielan’s What Would Beyonce Do?,  Tyler Oakley’s Slumber Party and all things Lady Gaga- and made my own response to this. 

I then tested this response (aka) Quarter Life Crisis at various scratch nights such as Brainchild’s Hatch and in previews in front of a sold out audience at OvalHouse, which has shaped how I deliver the show. I know that doing the show at Edinburgh Fringe it will also mould/change depending on the audience. 

Yolanda Mercy said, “‘It got to a point in my life where my friend was having a baby and my biggest concern was trying to keep my young person’s railcard. The more I looked around me it seemed that everyone was ‘adulting’; getting a mortgage, planning weddings and leaving big tips at restaurants. Feeling like Peter Pan and watching everyone leave Neverland, I turned to my laptop and started writing Quarter Life Crisis.” Yolanda Mercy is a London-based actor and playwright who works around the globe. She trained at the Brit School, Laban and Royal Central School of Speech and Drama. Her work is a springboard to discuss personal and social issues including mental health, unemployment and heritage. She is a winner of the Rich Mix Small Story Big City Award, Associate Artist at OvalHouse Theatre and was previously Resident at The Roundhouse and the Almeida Theatre. She has been partnered with and commissioned by: The British Council, Arts Council England, O2 Think Big, Soho Theatre, Rich Mix, Wandsworth Council, Talawa, Lyric Hammersmith, SE1 United, OvalHouse Theatre, Tamasha, The Migration Museum, Arc Stockton, Ideas Tap and Peggy Ramsey Foundation. Quarter Life Crisis will tour after the run at Edinburgh Fringe, with dates at Attenborough Arts Centre, Cheltenham Everyman, Arena Theatre Wolverhampton, Churchill Theatre Bromley and The Albany London confirmed for October and November 2017, with more dates to be added.

from the vileblog http://ift.tt/2s5WOFH

[parisian-nicole]

Bamon Fic: Cursed Blessings

 next."Title: Cursed Blessings

Author: Parisian aka Pari

Rating: M

Summary:  A recently deceased Big Bad is still reeking havoc, and causing both Bonnie and Damon more heartache. Will they be able to overcome it?

Author’s Note: I’ve only posted this fic in bits and piece here on Tumblr. Now, that I’ve wrapped it up (will probably do an epilogue) I’ve decided to post it in it’s entirety thus far. There maybe some slight changes from the original posted on FF.net. This story was began and first published online on 10-08-15.

"Vampire Barbie," Damon greeted from where he stood stood by the bar, making himself a 3rd drink, as Stefan sat nearby. The two brothers had been discussing how they were going to help Alaric, who was currently lost in the grief of losing Jo and their twins. "To what do we owe…"

"Have you seen Bonnie?" Caroline Forbes asked in a huff as she barreled into the Salvatore living room. "And it really pisses me off that I have to get the 411 on 'my' best friend from you," She added as she placed one hand on her hip and her face scowled up in disgust. Her words brought a twinkle of delight into Damon's eyes and a smirk on his mouth. "She told me she was heading out of town for a couple of weeks to some witch convention thingy."

"Yeah I got the text." Damon replied and then sipped from his glass of whiskey. His words made Caroline frown up even more.

"At what time?" She asked and Damon pulled his phone from his pocket, scroll through his many text messages from Bonnie, which he had never gotten around to clearing out.

"1:15 pm, Tuesday before last." He answered as he checked the text. Caroline checked the timestamp on her message and then huffed.

"Yeah Bon-Bon and I are gonna have to have a serious talk about which one of us is her 'bestest' best friend. I cannot believe she texted you first," Damon threw her a wink as his smirk spread into a genuine smile.

"Is there something wrong with Bonnie?" Stefan asked interrupting Damon and Caroline's tit for tat.

"I don't know, thus the reason I am here. I mean she said she was leaving for a few days and I know that she's been completing her class work online, we have pretty much the same classes and she's been turning in her assignments."

"You are going to get to a point…" Damon interjected arching one brow.

"Well she was home last night, I saw her…I mean the lights were out but I saw her in her bedroom window and she looked like she was crying." Caroline stated and both Salvatore brothers took on a look of concern. "I rushed to the door knocked and knocked but she wouldn't answer. I listened for any signs that she was inside but I didn't hear anything, not even her heartbeat."

"Then are you really sure you saw what you think you saw?" Damon inquired.

"C'mon do you think I would come over here and ask you of all people for help if I wasn't sure?" She responded. "I know she's in that house and she was probably using magic to block me from sensing her. I'm just really worried about her, after the whole thing with Elena…" She cut her statement short when she noticed the way Damon's eyes hardened. Discussions of Elena were still too hard for them all but mainly Damon. "Bonnie is all I have now."

"Fine," Damon spoke out, tossed back the remainder of his drink, and then sat the glass atop the bar with a smack. "Let's go over to Bonnie's and check on things." Stefan nodded as he stood. "Not you little brother, we still have the Alaric situation to deal with. You head over there and see if you can get him to at least bathe, because I don't think he has since the wedding that wasn't. Blondie and I will go check on things with Bonnie, and we'll share notes later.

"I already told you she's not answering the door, and I hope you are not planning on breaking and entering." Caroline said as she followed Damon out of the room and to the front exit.

"Breaking and entering is an option, or we could use this key that Bonnie gave me, her 'bestest' best friend." He mocked as he dangled the key in front of Caroline.

"Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me." She exclaimed truly stunned by the idea that Bonnie would have given a copy of her house key to Damon of all people.

sometime later:

"Bonnie, you home?" Caroline called out as she and Damon entered the Bennett home. "Bonnie!" She called out louder but still received no reply. After a moment's pause both Caroline and Damon lifted their eyes to the ceiling where the two supernatural beings could hear the faint sounds of someone crying. They both rushed up the stairs and went directly to Bonnie's room. Caroline opened the bedroom door and let out a sudden gasp to what she was seeing. Damon looked on in wonderment from over her back. They were both stunned at the sight if Bonnie seated in the middle of her bedroom floor with her Grimoire open and a clutter of papers with what looked to be spells written all over them.

"No…no…no, it's not working," Bonnie mumbled out her face wet with tears. She looked, unlike her normal self; free of makeup, hair in a sloppy low ponytail, and wearing clothes that were a couple of sizes too big for her. Damon let his eyes study her for a moment and he made a mental note that a make-up free slightly messy Bonnie Bennett was really quite breathtaking.

"Bonnie?" Caroline called out gently to her obviously distraught friend and Bonnie jumped at her unnoticed visitors.

"Care," Bonnie sobbed out in relief as a small smile crossed her face. But that smile instantly crumbled at seeing the other person standing in the doorway behind Caroline. Damon stared back at Bonnie curiously, and what he saw in her eyes kept him silent. He saw a fear he hadn't seen for a long time. He wondered why Bonnie would show fear when she looked at him, she hadn't since they had returned from Kai's prison world, and if he were to be completely honest, and not for some time prior. Not since she had started to realize the power of her magic. The two newly forged friends stared at one another for a few more seconds before Bonnie broke the gaze by bowing her head and averting her eyes back down to her Grimoire. "He did this and…It won't go away…I can't make it go away. It's inside of me Care," She spun panicked eyes to Caroline who approached her and began to kneel beside her. "I don't understand how it's even possible, I've tried everything, but it won't go away. It's like he's made it so I can't use my magic on myself."

"Ok sweetie, who are you talking about?" Caroline spoke in a soothing voice as she reached out and stroked Bonnie's wild tresses. "What's inside of you that won't go away?" She asked and then Bonnie grasped Caroline's hand and placed it against the small, firm swell of her belly, which wasn't noticeable in the oversize sweatshirt Bonnie was wearing. "Oh my God," Caroline exclaimed in surprise, but before she could question Bonnie further her words died on her mouth when she looked up at Bonnie and found solid black eyes and a face cover in black veins staring back at her.

"And I'm so hungry," Bonnie hissed out before grabbing Caroline with incredible strength that the young vampire couldn't shake off. Bonnie dove in and gripped Caroline's neck into her mouth, bit down breaking the flesh there, and began to drink deeply. Caroline cried out in surprise and pain which caused Damon to rush in to assist. Damon grabbed for Bonnie but she easily swatted him away. His face held a curious and confused look as he moved back to where Bonnie still feed from Caroline. This time he lashed out and hesitantly struck her across her face, which knocked her unconscious.

"Ok, what the fuck was that?" Caroline cried out as she jumped from her spot on the floor. She held her hand against her bloodied neck while looking down at Bonnie's body which was cradled in Damon's arms as he sat with her on the floor.

"Looks like Bonnie's been turned," Damon spoke out as a look of shock, disappointment, and anger washed over his face. His mind already filled with thoughts of the things he would do to the vampire who would dare touch his witch.

"No, something's not right. She's still human Damon," Caroline said and Damon allowed his senses to pick up the tell-tale signs that told him that Bonnie was still in fact human. "Then there's this," Caroline kneeled down again and lifted Bonnie's shirt to reveal that she was pregnant. Damon's eyes doubled in size as his mouth fell open slightly. "Damon, Bonnie and I went out to the lake just a couple of weeks ago. She wore a bikini and 'that' was not there. She looks like she's about 5 or 6 months pregnant. She's freakishly strong…and apparently I look like food to her." Damon was at a loss for words as he stared at Bonnie swollen belly in amazement just as his phone vibrated in his pocket. He shifted Bonnie's weight in his left arm as he reached for his phone with his right hand. He pulled his phone out, glanced at the ID, and then answered as he focused his concerned eyes back to Bonnie.

"Now is not the best time little brother, something is seriously wrong with Bonnie." Damon spoke out into his phone while still looking at Bonnie with a confused scowl on his face.

"Yeah well considering what arrived at Alaric's while I was visiting with him, I'm not surprised." Stefan replied as he stood in the boarding house with Alaric.

"What are you talking about?" Damon questioned.

"It was a package. Inside there were some baby items meant for Alaric and…There's a VHS tape with yours and Bonnie's name written on it. It's apparently from…"

"VHS… It’s Kai," Damon growled out, his voice laced with anger as he thought about the warlock who had made his and Bonnie's life a living hell.

"Yeah, you need to get back to the boarding house now."

"We're on our way," Damon said as he ended the call not bothering to ask for any details. "C'mon," He said to Caroline as he carefully lifted Bonnie up into his arms and turned back to the exit. "We need to get back to the boarding house."

Later at the boarding house:

"What happened to Bonnie?" Stefan questioned as he watched Caroline and Damon enter the room, the latter carrying a still unconscious Bonnie.

"Still not sure," Damon mumbled out as he moved to the nearby sofa and gently settled Bonnie upon it. Once he had her comfortably situated he kneeled beside the sofa and brushed her stray locks from her face, as he stared at her serene face with worried eyes.

"What we do know," Caroline spoke out. "Is that Bonnie's pregnant and she thinks I'm food." She rubbed at her sore neck, which was still red and swollen and bore Bonnie's teeth marks. She was a bit surprised that it hadn't healed already.

"What…wait Bonnie's pregnant?" Stefan asked as he moved closer to regard the sleeping beauty.

"Yeah," Caroline replied as she scowled and stepped closer as well. "And I swear she's gotten bigger from the time it took us to get here from her house."

"Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." Damon confirmed as his brow bunched in confusion.

"Yeah well that explains the note I got with the box of baby things." Alaric finally spoke and then tossed back his 3rd glass of scotch.

"What did the note say?" Damon asked as he, Stefan, and Caroline all stared at their unkempt, slightly drunken friend.

"That I should give the baby things to Bonnie since Joe and I wouldn't need them."

"I should have guessed that sick son of a bitch was behind this." Damon hissed out. "He must have raped Bonnie while she was stuck in that prison world with him." He added his rage evident as the others in the room looked at Bonnie in shock. "God, she told me about some of the stuff he'd done to her, but never 'that'." Damon's anger then turned inward onto himself, if only he hadn't left her there, as if her had had a choice.

"I think we should watch the tape, I'm sure he's going to tell us in great detail exactly what he's done." Alaric said. "First we need to find a VCR."

Sometime later:

She had awoken with a start as her eyes scanned the unfamiliar room. "I thought you'd be more comfortable here than on the couch," Damon spoke out gently and Bonnie snapped her eyes to his, surprised by his presence. She just as quickly averted them as she turned her head, but still she threw him side way glances. "Ok, what's going on Bon? Why are you acting like I stole your puppy and ate it?" He asked as he scowled in irritation. She scowled back at him, her eyes displaying her fear and now confusion. "Oh and Caroline is fine by the way, though you did take a nice chunk out of her," Those words crashed upon Bonnie and seemed to squeeze the breath out of her. Her eyes doubled in size as she covered her mouth and let out the most pitiful cry Damon had ever heard. "Hey, she's ok really," He reassured as he rushed to the side of the panicked woman, and placed both of his hands on her shoulders.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…it's all my fault," Bonnie said as she openly cried and rocked herself a bit.

"What are you talking about?" Damon asked as he stared down at her curiously.

"I should have destroyed the Ascendant," She replied but not directly answering Damon just simply speaking out. "We never should have let Kai out of that prison world, then Elena would be here right now, Alaric and Jo and their babies would be safe, and he couldn't have magically impregnated me."

"Say what now?" Damon questioned, the last bit of her sentence sticking out most in his mind. Bonnie looked at him with the same fright filled gaze he had noticed earlier.

"Hey you two," Stefan spoke from the open door of Damon's bedroom. "Everything is set up and ready. Let's see what sick game Kai is playing from beyond the grave."

"In a moment, Bon and I were just having a private conversation," Damon tossed over his shoulder to his little brother but never took questioning eyes from Bonnie's face, as she seemed to have shrunk under his stare.

"I'm sure whatever's going on Kai has taken great pleasure in telling us all about it in his video," Stefan added and Bonnie looked over at the other Salvatore brother.

"Kai sent you a video too?" She asked.

"Yeah," Stefan responded as he bunched his brows in confusion while regarding the petite woman who looked even smaller in Damon's oversize four posted bed. "What he sent you one?" She nodded before speaking.

"Yeah, about a week ago," She answered.

"What was on it?" Damon asked as his scowl deepened as his eye roamed from Bonnie's face down to her swollen belly.

"What he had planned for me," Bonnie answered as she looked at him and he briefly looked back into her eyes before letting them settled back on her belly.

"The baby," He spoke out and she nodded her head as Stefan stepped closer intrigued. "Ok, lets get downstairs and see what that asshole has done now."

A while later downstairs:

"Are you ok?" Caroline asked Bonnie who had trekked into the Salvatore living room after Stefan but before Damon.

"Yeah I'm ok," Bonnie replied with a nod as her eyes searched Caroline's neck which was still slightly bruised, but had otherwise healed. "Caroline, I am so sorry, I don't know what possessed me to attack you like that."

"My money is on Kai," Alaric spoke out as he stood near the TV he had hooked up with the VCR and had already popped the tape into. "So, let's see what he has to say," He then pushed play and Kai's smiling face instantly appeared on the screen.

"Hello Damon and Bonnie," Kai greeted with what Bonnie had once referred to as his devilish smile.

"Wait...isn't that," Stefan began to speak as he studied the surrounding in the video. "He's in our house and he's wearing one of my robes."

"If you're watching this," Kai continued. "Then somehow you've done the impossible and you've killed me. That must have really sucked for me. I wonder, who was the one to deal that final deadly blow? Oh I hope it was you Bonnie and it was up close and very personal with your hot hands on my body." He rubbed his hand sensuously across his chest as he bit down on his bottom lip. Bonnie rolled her eyes as she folded her arms across her chest as comfortably as her increasingly swollen belly would allow. "I bet you just look so adorable by now with your belly so full with child. So have you told Damon yet? I bet you haven't because you've been so busy trying to break the spell, well good luck with that. Anyway, let me be the first to say congratulations Bonnie and Damon, it's a girl!" The screen suddenly paused freezing the Cheshire cat looking grin that was plastered on Kai's face. Stefan stood with the remote in his outstretched hand

"Wait…Is he saying that somehow he impregnated you with Damon's seed, that's not possible." Stefan stated, his face holding the same dumbfounded look that was now on Alaric and Caroline's face.

"Stefan you're a vampire, I'm a witch, and Elena is in a magical 70 year sleep right now, but you think this is impossible?" Bonnie said pointing to her belly as she rolled her eyes slightly and even Damon had to chuckle at the absurdity of his little brother's words.

"Point taken, but how did he do it?" Stefan continued. "How did Kai get Damon's…sperm, and how the hell did he get it inside of you, without either of you noticing." Caroline and Alaric were both dying to know the answer to that as well.

"I think it was karaoke night, from what Kai said on the video he sent to me. It wasn't a long video just a minute or so, just long enough to tell me that I was pregnant and that it was Damon's. The when and how kind of came to me afterwards," Bonnie replied and Stefan scrunched up his face even more confused than before, while Damon's face paled a bit as he suddenly recalled the events of that night, which he had been working hard, and often failing miserably at trying to forget.

7 days prior:

"…And I feel so dirty when they start talking cute, I wanna tell her that I love her, but the point is probably moot. 'Cause she's watching him with those eyes, and she's loving him with that body I just know it, and he's holding her in his arms late, late at night…You know I wish that I had Jessie's girl…" Caroline and Bonnie bounced on the small stage set up in the Grill for the karaoke night. Most of the crowd was standing on their feet dancing along and enjoying themselves. Damon and Stefan sat at a table near the stage. Stefan swayed in his seat to the music, as Damon looked on with the guise of horror on his face.

"How the hell did I let Bonnie talk me into this?" Damon wondered aloud.

"With the promise of a lot of booze," Stefan answered and Damon smirked, nodded, and then tossed back the glass of whiskey he held in his hand. "C'mon Damon loosen up a bit and have some fun. We all miss Elena, but she wouldn't want you moping around for the next 70 years."

"You know I wish that I had Jessie's girl, where can I find a woman like that?" Bonnie and Caroline belted out in beautiful harmony. Damon smiled as he watched Bonnie having so much fun and he had to admit that she was a very talented singer, with an amazing voice. He made a mental note to coax her into giving him a solo performance sometime.

"Yeah, well I'll just be 'loosening up' at the bar." Damon announce as he stood from their table.

"What, you don't wanna go next? I was thinking Aerosmith's 'I don't wanna miss a thing'," Stefan teased around a smile which widened at the 'fuck you' look Damon cast to him before he turned and moved to the bar. He hadn't been seated at the bar but mere seconds before a fiery redhead came and settled onto the bar stool beside him.

"Hi," She greeted with a smile, and Damon couldn't stop the pleased look on his face as he turned and took in the beauty beside him.

"Well hello,"

"Buy a parched girl a drink?" She asked.

"Get the lady whatever her heart desires." Damon said to the barkeep, who regarded the woman awaiting her order.

"Bourbon," She said and her glass was quickly filled. "I'm Debbie, by the way."

"Hello Debbie, I'm Damon." He replied throwing out his most charming smile. Debbie smiled back as she whispered a string of chants under her breath and Damon's eyes flashed gold. Damon shook his head as if to clear it and then focused back on the woman in front of him. "I'm sorry what was I saying," Before the younger lady could reply another's voice cut in.

"I know you're not trying to skip out on karaoke night Damon," Bonnie called out as she moved up to the bar with her arms folded across her chest. She carefully regarded the other seated woman as she awaited Damon's reply.

"Sorry Bon, I just came for the drinks…and to make new friends," Damon said as he smiled and lifted his glass in a toast to Debbie. Debbie in turn smiled back and looked at Damon but held Bonnie in her peripheral. "Meet my new friend Debbie," Bonnie immediately snorted at the name as she looked at the redhead full on.

"Debbie…really?" Bonnie questioned as she giggled slightly. "And what does Debbie 'do'?" Damon nearly choked on his drink as his laughter bubbled in his throat at Bonnie seemingly innocent words and the very lewd images they invoked. During their months trapped in 1994, Damon had discovered and had come to truly appreciate the fact that Bonnie Bennett had a deliciously wicked sense of humor. One that he felt rivaled his own.

"Uhm… 'Debbie does…'," Damon threw out to Debbie as he fought to contain his laughter, and he could see that Bonnie was trying to do the same. Debbie only smiled as she nodded her head. She grasped the untouched glass of bourbon Damon had bought her, and neither Bonnie nor Damon seemed to notice it darkened just a shade. She then slid the glass across the counter towards Damon and stood from her stool.

"Tonight, I thought it would be 'Debbie does Damon', but I guess not." She said and Damon threw her a playful disappointed pout as she turned and walked away. When she was gone both Damon and Bonnie fell into a fit of laughter.

"Seriously Damon?" Bonnie spoke around her giggles as she took the vacated stool beside him.

"What you said that Elena wouldn't expect me to be some celibate hermit, and that I should go out meet a girl…"

"I said a 'nice' girl, not some skank at a bar," Bonnie corrected.

"Well no worries you scared her off, good job, oh and you owe me $5," He said as he picked up his glass and sipped at it.

"For what?" She questioned as she stared at him curiously.

"For the wasted liquor," He answered as he eyed the drink Debbie had ordered. Bonnie rolled her eyes at him and then reached over, grasped the glass, and tossed it all back. She swallowed and her face instantly clinched up. She squeezed her eyes shut, shook her head while her nose crinkled up, and she opened her mouth and released a distasteful gurgling noise. Damon chuckled as he looked on impressed with Bonnie's bravado.

"Oh my God, my nose is on fire…and my throat…and my stomach," She belched out as she still had her eyes clamped shut. "How can you stand this?" She asked as she reached up both of her hands and fanned them in her face, in a fruitless attempt at cooling herself down.

"Well, I've had over 150 years of practice, Bon," He replied. His brows suddenly bunched in confusion and his nostrils flared as a sweet scent suddenly filled his nose. He eyed Bonnie suspiciously as he let his eyes roam over her frame from her head down to her toes. When she finally opened her eyes they flashed an amber hue, and then she lifted them to look at Damon. She was struck with a wave of lust which disturbed and horrified her because of the person it seemed to be directed at.

"Whoa, that packs a punch," She said with wide eyes which she hurriedly averted downward from his as she hopped from the stool. "I'm gonna go to the restroom in case Caroline comes looking for me." Damon reached out in concern to her sudden behavior. He gently grasped her wrist and both he and Bonnie nearly crumbled to the floor as they both became assaulted with crippling pleasure. "Oh God, let g…go of me," Bonnie gasped out as she tried to free herself from his grip, and after a second he let her go. She rushed to the bathroom, once inside she stood at one of the 3 vanity sinks, gripping its edge as she tried to catch her breath and stop her knees from wobbling. She stared at herself in the mirror and wondered what the hell had just happened to her. She thought it may have been her imagination but she was sure that whatever she had just felt Damon had felt as well. She didn't have long to dwell on her thoughts before the restroom door swung open, she silently watched Damon's reflection as he closed the door and flipped the lock. Both stood for a moment just staring at each other; Bonnie from her position gripping the sink, and Damon from his place with his back pressed against the door.

Then in the next blink he was moving to her, and Bonnie turned to greet him. He gripped her about her waist and lifted her until she was seated upon the sink. He pushed her short blue party dress up her thighs, which he nudged open to settle in between them, and then he yanked her panties from her body. For her part Bonnie grabbed at his pants and yanked the buckle of his belt and pulled it opened, unzipped his pants, and quickly freed him. They paused a moment and just stared at each other, both wanted to say something, wanted to end their rendezvous before it began, but neither seemed to have the strength to do so. Damon dipped his head and captured Bonnie's lips in a deep, sensuous kiss as he surged forward and buried himself deep within her heat. Bonnie groaned into the kiss and pushed against Damon a bit as a searing pain filled her womb. She had only ever been with one guy, Jeremy, and Damon seemed to be much more endowed then the younger Gilbert. In reply to her resisting Damon tightened his grip and began to thrust in and out in a feverish motion, and before long Bonnie was grinding herself against Damon, and moaning out her ecstasy.

Within moments of their connection Bonnie's body was slammed with an orgasm so intense it stole her breath and caused her heart palpitations. She broke from their kiss, throwing her head back and screaming out her pleasure which was drowned out to the outside world by the music that boomed throughout the bar. As Bonnie panted and her senses calmed, Damon raged on to find his release. His hands on her upper thigh and hips tightened and Bonnie winced, knowing she would have bruises later. Her body jerked wildly under Damon's manipulation. When his orgasm overtook him Damon vamped out uncontrollably, something he hadn't done since his early years as a fledgling that couldn't control his demon. He lunged for Bonnie's neck and she closed her eyes and she tensed up, anticipating the pain of his teeth tearing into her flesh, but after a few seconds she only felt him place a soft kiss against her jugular instead. He pulled back and then pulled completely from her body with his human guise back in place. She slid from the sink and adjusted her dress back down.

"Bonnie...I..." Damon tried to talk as he fixed his pants but he was truly at a loss for words as he found himself struggling with the urge to take her again.

"We don't have to talk about it," Bonnie interjected quickly as she lifted her right hand to smooth down her hair a bit. "In fact I don't want to talk about what just happened...ever, and we'll pretend that it never happened. So no one ever has to know. Ok?" Damon only nodded his head in replied and then almost sorrowfully made his way to the door, unlocked it, and then walked out. Bonnie's shoulder slumped a bit as she bowed her head, closed her eyes, and let out a deep sigh. But then her head shot up as one of the latches on the stalls clicked and a young brunette walked out looking more embarrassed then Bonnie in that moment. Without a word the brunette moved to one of the empty sinks, washed her hands, and then hurried from the bathroom. Bonnie could only chuckle at the craziness that was her life as she turned back to the sink and began to clean herself up as best she could to make herself more presentable. She then left the restroom with the intent of rejoining her friends but instead found herself rushing from the bar.

Present day:

"It was just the one time, and it was like we had no control," Bonnie spoke out wanting to explain and defend her actions that night.

"Oh sweetie," Caroline moved to her best friend without fear or hesitation and wrapped her arms around Bonnie's shoulder. "It's obvious that Kai set this all up. So no one's judging you. I mean sleeping with Damon 'eww'," She added as she scrunched up her face like she smelled something disgusting causing Bonnie to smile a bit and Damon to shoot her the evil eye. "But hey I've been there, done that, and have regretted it ever since so I would never toss any stones over that."

"Thanks Care," Bonnie said smiling at her friend's horrid attempt at making her feel better.

"My guess is 'Debbie' was working for Kai and probably put something in your drinks maybe," Alaric offered as an explanation. "But only one way to know for sure," He then nodded to the remote Stefan still held. Stefan also nodded his head as he started up the tape again.

"So, I bet you're wondering how I did it?" Kai resumed his story. "Well, I could tell you in details about how I did everything but the truth is, I'm just one bad Mofo! But I am also a narcissist too so here goes…I found the cure for vampirism in the 1903 prison world…did you know that when a prison world is created it duplicates all magical items within that world? Bonnie got the cure from the 1994 prison world and I got the cure from the 1903 prison world and I used it on Damon." Those words frightened Damon as the thought of being human once again filtered through his mind. "Oh, but don't worry Damon I only used a pinch of it in a spell. See I only wanted your little swimmers viable so they could knock up Bonnie. No worries I need you to remain a vampire, otherwise this all would not be nearly as fun," Kai stated as that 'devilish grin' reappeared on his face. "Ok, so then there was this ancient incantation that would compel anyone and anything to do your biddings, even vampires, I did tweak it a little and added a lust factor. Made it so you two would turn into little horn dogs and do the nasty. Once everything was ready and perfect I had a friend, you remember Debbie right? Come on out from behind the camera Deb and say hi," A second later the redhead moved into the view of the camera smiled and waved, and then disappeared out of view again. "She a new wicca with just enough powers to deliver my beautiful spell to both of you. Damon I knew you'd be easy to bewitch, throw a sexy beautiful woman in your face and the chance at getting laid, you lose all thought, But Bonnie," Kai frowned up a bit with a look of disappointment on his face as he 'tsked' at her. "C'mon, you're a witch, and a pretty darn powerful one if I do say so myself. How could you not even sense a hint of the magical properties that was floating about? Why are you still fighting the fact that you are a witch? You should embrace it, celebrate it, and then use your powers to take over the world." Bonnie watched as Kai gloated and a part of her wished she could fully embraced her nature, had she done so long ago she probably would have sensed who and what he truly was, she would have sense that she and Damon were trapped in his prison world, and she would have definitively killed him the instant he had given them the Ascendant. But the truth was she was afraid of fully embracing her powers, fear of it corrupting her as easily as it had Kai. "So what is this all for I'm sure you're wondering? Well this is in the event that my other spell doesn't go off as planned. You know the one where I tied Elena's life to Bonnie's? The more I thought on that spell the more I thought it was an iffy proposition really. I mean on the one hand I could tell just by having to listen to Damon whine about his precious beloved Elena for months in my prison world, that he's obsessed with her. Honestly Damon it's kind of disturbing and creepy, and dude you really needs to find another hobby. Anyway, you'd think it would be an easy choice for you 'Kill Bonnie and save your beloved Elena', but then I noticed something unexpected...you 'love' Bonnie," Kai announced and his words only surprised Bonnie and Damon, since it had already become obvious to the others in the room awhile ago. "I mean you put on this great show of pretending like you don't give a damn about her, but the truth is you actually love her. So I started to wonder could you, would you kill the woman you loved to save the woman you're obsessed with? I totally blame myself for giving you such a weak ass ultimatum. I shouldn't have said kill Bonnie or your girlfriend will be sleeping for 70 years. I mean you're a vampire 70 years is nothing for you I would imagine. No I should have said you have 24 hours to kill Bonnie or else your girlfriend will die. I mean that is way more dramatic right? But see me I'm all about dragging out ones misery, letting it fester and marinate. It's a bad habit I know but I am working on it, thus the reason for this new spell. I couldn't undo the original spell," Kai stated and then paused as if expecting someone to object. "No seriously I made that spell ironclad so that even I couldn't break it, like say if my life was threatened in some way. Elena's life is really tied to Bonnie's life and as long as Bonnie lives Elena will sleep that is the basics of the spell, however," He spoke around a smile. "I was able to modify it just a bit so that now Elena's life is tied to Bonnie's 'lineage'."

"What the hell does that even mean?" Damon was the one to bark out what everyone else was thinking.

"It means," Kai replied as if answering Damon directly. "That so long as Bonnie and any of her 'descendants' lives Elena will continue imitating Rip Van Winkle. And the plot thickens," Kai said around his laughter, clearly delighted by what he had done. "Now, I put to you Damon, could you kill Bonnie and 'your' unborn child to save your beloved Elena? Because if you don't, if you actually allow Bonnie to give birth to that precious little girl, you'll never ever see Elena awake again. See that babe is part vampire and part witch, the first ever of her kind to be born into existence. Yeah I did that," He added genuinely impressed with his on accomplishments of casting spells that others had never had the skill set to do, or either had always been too afraid to do. "So. once the child is born the final stage of the spell will be completed, and 'both' mother and child will become immortal."

"Oh my God!" Bonnie cried out as she let her hands drop to her belly.

"Now, I'm not completely evil and unfeeling so don't worry I wouldn't leave you with a crying baby for all eternity. The baby will age like any normal human until she's 18, then her immortality will kick in. As for all the little gifts she'll have from being a vamp/witch hybrid, well I'll just let those be a surprise. Not that I expect that she'll even be alive that long. Am I right Damon? Well you have about another week to decide, that's how long I've given for Bonnie to reach full gestation. Man, I wish I was there right now to see your faces," Kai laughed out for a few seconds before the video ended and the screen turned blue. All eyes turned to Damon who had completely vamped out and was staring right at Bonnie, who gasped out as she noticed his menacing gaze. Caroline and Stefan shared a knowing glance and a nod. Then, in a well calculated move, Caroline flashed to Bonnie and moved her from the living room, up to one of the vacant bedrooms upstairs, as Stefan flashed to Damon and swiftly snapped his neck. Alaric moved up beside Stefan as they stood over Damon lifeless body on the floor.

"You think that was necessary?" Alaric questioned.

"I don't know but I wasn't about to risk it." Stefan responded. "C'mon help me tie him up until we can figure out what to do next."

Upstairs:

"My life is crazy…this is all crazy," Bonnie spoke from her spot by the large window of the bedroom Caroline had barricaded them both inside of.

"Bon, I am so sorry that this is happening to you, I didn't know that Kai jerk or all the things that happened between you two in that prison world…" Caroline replied as she stood near the door, readying to defend Bonnie if somehow Damon came after her. "But sweetie none of this is your fault, and I am not going to let anyone hurt you or your baby."

"I don't even want this baby," Bonnie spoke out as she stared down at the slight swell of her belly, as she absentmindedly caringly and gently rubbed her hands across it, her actions in contrary to her words. "So don't feel like you have to protect it, as for me maybe it would be better for everyone…" She was quickly cut off by Caroline.

"What? No! Don't you say that, don't even think it. Ever since I've known you, you have always been the one to sacrifice yourself for everyone else's happiness, and especially for Elena's happiness," Caroline stated as she turned and stepped closer to her friend. Bonnie turned and regarded her with a frown on her face about to protest but Caroline cut her off again. "When we were little and you invited Elena and me over for your little tea parties, you'd always let Elena be the Hostess, and wear the tiara because she would always fake cry whenever you or I wanted to wear it. In grade school when we had that play about Old MacDonald's farm, you were picked to play the farmer's wife and Elena was supposed to be a cow, and she had a hissy fit about it. You switched with her just to make 'her' happy. Oh and then there was the Miss Mystic Falls competition when we were 15, everyone knew that you were going to win it but you suddenly dropped out at the last minute saying you got some kind of food poisoning, but I know you only did that because Elena told you she wanted to be Miss Mystic Falls to impress some boy at the time. Bonnie you have spent your life playing second fiddle to Elena Gilbert, and before it was no big; throwing some competition…giving her a part in some silly play, but now this is about your life, Bon. Are you really willing to die for Elena?" Caroline asked as she looked to her friend.

"I may not have a say in it. Care, me and this baby are the only things keeping Damon from Elena, and you know he would do whatever he had to, to get Elena back. Last time he chose me because it was just 70 years keeping him from Elena, a long time by human standards but doable for a vampire. There was a light at the end of the tunnel, there was hope. Now it's kill me or Elena never ever wakes up. I've gotten to know Damon pretty well these past few months I would even say he's one of my closest friends now," That made Caroline roll her eyes and toss out a 'hmph', and Bonnie smiled a bit at the jealous behavior. "But given the current scenario I'm not so sure he would choose me over Elena this time, even if I am carry his child."

Back Downstairs:

"You can untie me I'm not going to hurt Bonnie," Damon said from his position chained with his feet firmly on the ground while his arms spread outward, and were linked from one of the sturdy ceiling beams in the main entrance. Stefan and Alaric chose that spot because they knew that no matter how much Damon pulled he'd never break his bindings.

"Wish we could believe that, but the way you were looking earlier suggested otherwise," Stefan said as he stood before his brother, staring up at him with his arms folded across his chest. "Until we can figure this out we'll…"

"There's nothing to figure out. As for earlier I admit I lost it for a moment at hearing what Kai had done, but c'mon do you honestly think I would kill Bonnie?" Damon spat out.

"Do you remember our nephew, Zach?" Stefan threw out and Damon's mouth shut and his jaws clinched as he silently glared down at his younger brother. "…and his pregnant girlfriend Gail?" He added as Alaric looked on curiously and in confusion. "You killed them Damon without a care in the world. Gail was 8 months pregnant and you snapped her neck for no other reason than to get back at me because I had pissed you off. So, yeah I know you could kill Bonnie and your unborn child, and for Elena I believe that you most definitely would."

"Arrrggh, let me out of these fucking chains Stefan!" Damon roared out as he struggled wildly but to no avail.

"I'm sorry, Damon, I love Elena too but I won't let you hurt another innocent mother and child, and even if I did don't you realize you'd still lose Elena once she found out what you did?"

"How many times do you want me to say it, 'I would never kill Bonnie'," Damon growled out as he lurched forward as if to attack his brother, with only the shackles to stop him.

"I just can't risk it, so until we find a solution to this mess Kai has created we have to keep her and 'your' child safe." Stefan stated and then turned and walked away heading up to check on Bonnie and Caroline.

"You really killed a pregnant woman and her unborn child?" Alaric asked once they were the only ones left in the room. This knowledge reopened very fresh wounds from his recent loss of Josette and their unborn babies.

"Yeah, and Kai knew about it which is probably why that sick fuck set all of this up," Damon confessed as he gave up pulling on the chains. "If it's any consolation my humanity was turned off at the time so…"

"It's not," Alaric replied.

"Ric, you didn't truly know me back then and if you did you probably wouldn't have liked me very much," Damon continued. "But you do know me now, you're like a brother to me. Do you honestly think I would hurt Bonnie? I couldn't even if I wanted to which I don't."

"Why should I believe that?" Alaric questioned as he folded his arm across his chest.

"While we were trapped in Kai's prison world the impossible happened, we got to know each other and low and behold we got a long and found that we liked each other's company. We depended on each other and yeah we'd fight like always and sometimes one of us would storm off saying we'd were never coming back, but we always did, because we were all each other had," Damon stated as his eyes held a far off look while a small smile played on his mouth. "She did the one thing that no one else has ever done for me, including Stefan, 'you', and even Elena…Bonnie listened to me without judging me. I told her all kinds of shit I've done, some things I've never told anyone…the good and the bad and she just simply listened, and when I was done she'd always say, 'You're not that person anymore Damon. You're a good man. I can see that in you now and I believe in you'. Ric, she's truly my best friend and I'd literally go crazy if anything were to happen to her, OK?" Damon said.

Upstairs:

"Oh my God, and just when I didn't think I could detest Damon Salvatore more," Caroline spat out around the disgusted scowl on her face. "He actually killed a pregnant woman who was carrying his bloodline?"

"Yeah…but he had turned off his humanity," Bonnie added.

"You're defending what he did?" Caroline barked out irritably.

"I'm just saying you of all people should understand the behavior of a vampire who has turned off their humanity, Caroline," Bonnie said and flashes from a couple of months before flickered through Caroline's mind as she recalled all the terrible things she did when she turned off her humanity after she lost her mother. "My point in telling you about what Damon did was that he is capable even if it means killing his own blood, and with Elena as the prize its very likely. So don't assume that just because I'm carrying his baby that'll grant me any favors,” Bonnie closed her eyes and swayed a bit as the pangs that had been plaguing her for a week slammed into her once more. She leaned down and gripped the top of a nearby table to balance herself and try to catch her breath, which felt like it was being restricted.

"Bonnie are you ok?" Caroline asked in concern and she took a step towards her friend. Bonnie snapped her head up to Caroline and her black eyes and veiny face were displayed, causing Caroline to gasp out and take a cautious step backwards again until her back was to the door and her hand was resting on the knob.

"Stay away, please…I don't want to hurt you again," Bonnie hissed out around now obvious fangs. At that moment a knock came to the door.

"It's Stefan," He called from the other side of the door, and with a relieved sigh Caroline unlocked the door and opened it. "Hey how's everything up here?" He asked as he entered the bedroom.

"Well Vampire Bonnie has returned," Caroline replied and Stefan looked over at Bonnie in surprise.

"Whoa, Bonnie are you ok?" He asked as he took a step forward purposely putting himself in between Caroline and Bonnie.

"No, I'm so hungry," Bonnie whined out.

"OK, well we have plenty of food in the kitchen we can go down and find you something to eat." Stefan offered.

"I've already tried normal human food but I don't think 'she' wants that," Bonnie replied referring to the baby by its now known gender. "I think she needs blood and not just any kind, I think she needs vampire's blood, and not just any vampire."

"What makes you think that, sweetie?" Caroline asked as she looked at her friend who she could see was struggling to keep whatever it was that was happening under control.

"I…" Bonnie paused as shame filled her face. "I attacked my mailman and drank from him," She confessed and the shame was evident on her face. "Bu...but it didn't taste right and it made me really sick."

"Oh my God, Bonnie, did you kill him?" Caroline asked truly afraid of what that would do to Bonnie emotionally. Bonnie shook her head.

"No, and I somehow was able to heal him with my blood and compel him to forget. Like I said his blood made me physically sick. So I went out and I seduced some young male vampire and I fed from him, it didn't make me sick but it wasn't enough, I was still so hungry. It was like it wasn't what the baby needed. But yours…" She locked hungry eyes onto Caroline and Caroline took another step backwards. "Yours tasted really good and it stopped the hunger for a while."

"Sorry, Bon but I kind of need my blood," Caroline squeaked out.

"Ahhhh," Bonnie cried out as a savage hunger pain seared through her entire body, and she crumbled to the floor. Stefan and Caroline both wanted to rush to her but given what they had just learned they kept their distance.

"Caroline, why don't you go down to the kitchen and warm up some of the blood that we keep in stock," Stefan commanded over his back to Caroline, but never took his eyes off of Bonnie's crippled form. Bonnie scowled at the idea and before either of the vamps could make a move, Bonnie had flashed by them even faster than their eyes could keep up with. She then used her magic to close and lock them off inside the room after her escape. She had made her way downstairs in an attempt to leave the boarding house so she wouldn't be tempted to hurt her friends, but had only made it to the foyer before her knees buckled from the hunger pang that struck her.

"Ahhhhh!" Bonnie screamed out as she settled on her hands and knees and waited for the pain to subside.

"Bonnie?" Alaric called out in concern as he entered from the living room having heard her cries. She snapped up her head up and locked her black eyes upon him. He was taken aback at seeing the vamped out witch. Then he became slightly frightened by the familiar look of a predator stalking its prey. He kept his eyes locked to hers as she staggered to her feet, hungrily glaring at him.

"Bonnie, No!" A voice called out from behind them and Bonnie turned and glared at a chained up Damon. "I've got what you need, come here," He commanded and Bonnie's resolved faltered.

"Damon, it hurts so much," She whined out as she clutched her right hand against her belly.

"I know baby, I know," He consoled her. "Just come here, come to me and I will make it all better, I promise," He coaxed her and she turned and took steps closer to where he was chained up.

"Damon, what the hell are you doing?" Ric asked as he moved his eyes between Bonnie and Damon.

"Saving you from becoming dinner Ric," Damon countered but never took his eyes off of Bonnie. "We've already had this discussion. I'm not going to hurt Bonnie, I just want to help her," Damon stated. "I heard what you told Stefan and Caroline upstairs Bon, you need 'my' blood," Bonnie and Alaric looked at him in confusion. "You said you know the baby needs blood and that human blood is a no go…and just any ole vampire's blood doesn't do it for you either. The reason Caroline's blood tastes so good to you is because she was created from my blood. It's my blood that you want it's what the baby needs," He explained. "And this is totally something Kai would have designed, making it so your only food source is me. He probably figured I'd just let you starve. Bonnie," Damon called out to her again and she looked directly up into his eyes. "But you know I would never hurt you. What would I do with myself without you around to nag and annoy me?" He said around a smirk and Bonnie smiled at the words he'd often say to her while they were in the prison world.

"But how…how can she be like this," Ric asked as he stared at Bonnie baffled. "She's not a vampire, right?"

"No she's not," Damon replied as he let his eyes roam up and then down Bonnie's tiny frame. "We all know how diabolical Kai was, and this is just a part of his new sick game," Damon offered. "Come to me Bonnie, come feed." She took a hesitant step towards him and then stalled. Damon smiled warmly at her already knowing what was stopping her. Even though he could rip her heart out if she got closer, she was more concerned about hurting him if she fed off of him. "Bon-Bon, it's ok you won't hurt me and I'm not going to hurt you, so Kai is not going to win this time."

"Yes he will because Elena will probably never wake up," Bonnie pointed out the silent Elephant that was in the room.

"It's a spell Bon. A spell that was cast by a sociopath," Damon stated. "Now I know this hot little Wicca who is pretty damn powerful, and I would put my money on her magic over Kai's any day." Bonnie smiled slightly at Damon's praises. "But first you have to get better, so you have to feed. So come here and feed," he said as he bent his head to the side. Bonnie flashed to him and sniffed at his neck. Her mouth instantly began to water at the intoxicating aroma emanating from Damon's flesh. Her stomach grumbled as she gently sliced into his neck. Bonnie moaned as Damon's sweet blood filled her mouth. Damon hissed initially but then he began to moan right along with Bonnie, as a pleasurable zing struck his groin. He instinctively reached for her with a need to pull her closer, and had to growl out his frustration at the bindings restricting him. As if sensing Damon's need, and powered by an indescribable need of her own to feel his touch, Bonnie reached her right hand up and touched the shackles around his left wrist and both of the cuffs magically fell away. The instant he was free, Damon securely wrapped his arms around Bonnie and vamped out. He brushed Bonnie's hair back across her shoulder and exposed her neck. Damon rubbed his nose across Bonnie's neck and then he gently bit down, just as Caroline and Stefan rushed into the room. The two beings who were wrapped around each other seemed oblivious to the others there in the room, while the others watched their coupling in shocked horror.

"Damon…" Stefan called out as he moved to pull his brother away from Bonnie, but Caroline's grip on his arm stalled his attempt. "We have to stop him before he hurts Bonnie," He stated as he turned back to look at Caroline.

"It doesn't look like he's hurting her," Caroline said as she watched Damon and Bonnie feed on each other while moaning and groping at one another.

"Well, if he is it certainly doesn't look like Bonnie minds," Ric added.

After a moment Damon pulled back from Bonnie's neck panting out his satisfaction, as her blood stained his mouth. A smile curled his lips as he watched the others suspiciously with dark eyes, all while continuing to hold Bonnie close and allowing her to continue to feed on him. When she finally let him go she seemed to be even weaker than before as she closed her eyes with a sigh, rested her head against Damon's chest, and put her full weight upon him.

"I told you he was hurting her," Stefan declared as he moved to where Damon and Bonnie stood still wrapped around each other. The low long warning growl that poured from Damon's lips stopped him in his tracks.

"Don't be so dramatic Stefan," Damon spoke out as his human face reappeared while he shifted, dipped down a bit, and then lifted Bonnie's lax body easily up into his arms. "She's been starved, now she's finally gotten a good meal and she's sated. I'm sure you've never really seen a truly satisfied woman before," He added and earned himself a glare and eye roll from Stefan. "But usually when a woman is thoroughly satisfied they get sleepy." Caroline begrudgingly nodded at Damon's assessment. "I'm going to get her up to my room so she can rest."

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Stefan said.

"I was not asking for your opinion little brother, nor do I care what you think," Damon replied with a smirk and then he moved him and Bonnie pass his brother and to the stairs. Stefan and Alaric didn't bother stopping him, but Caroline hurried close behind him. Damon ignored the blonde vampire until he had gotten a sleeping Bonnie into his bedroom and settled into his bed. "Don't need an audience Blondie," He tossed over his shoulder as he stood from the bed and made his way to his en-suite.

"What the hell…" Caroline began but her words were stalled as Damon exited the bathroom and glared hard at her.

"Lets use our inside voices," He said in a warning tone as he shot his eyes to the still sleeping witch before settling them back onto Caroline, who got his meaning.

"What the hell was that downstairs?" She asked in a hushed tone. He arched his eyes in reply in a questioning manner, though he knew exactly what she was referring to. "You guys were feeding on each other and…"

"It was nothing, I wasn't trying to hurt Bonnie," Damon defended again. "You came to me for help in the first place because 'I'm" Bonnie's bestie, remember?" He said knowing it was a touchy subject for Caroline, and in reply she rolled her eyes a bit and crossed her arms across her chest in a defensive manner. "Well it goes both ways, and I would never intentionally hurt Bon."

"Yeah well 'hurting' her wasn't what I meant," She responded. "It didn't look like 'hurting' her was what was on your mind. That looked like some of the things that Stefan and I…"

"Please," He cut her off as he held up his hand and closed his eyes a second before opening them and resting them on her again. "Do not finish that sentence. That is an image I do not want in my mind…ever."

"My point is that seemed very…'intimate', as in something you would do with Elena, not Bonnie."

"It was nothing, definitely nothing for you to worry about Blondie, now if you don't mind…" He dismissively waved at the door.

"You don't seriously expect me to leave you alone with Bonnie," Caroline stated as she looked at him as if he had lost his mind.

"How many times do I have to say it…"

"It's fine Care," Bonnie's gentle voice interrupted their tit-for-tat. "I'm fine," Both Damon and Caroline looked down at Bonnie's fragile looking frame, both their eyes full of concern. "I'm just tired and I want to sleep for a few hours."

"You want me to stay with you and keep wat…you company?" Caroline asked as she eyed Damon, who only rolled his eyes in reply.

"No, Damon will keep me company, right?" Bonnie said as she casually looked at him, and he simply nodded his head in agreement.

"I don't know Bon…"

"Care, it's ok really. I don't think Damon is going to hurt me now, I mean he could have easily done so downstairs if that were his intent." Bonnie defended. "Besides, I don't want you here if I… get hungry again. I'll need Damon."

"Right, no need for piss poor quality when she's got the premium stuff right here on tap," Damon spoke with a wide smile as he waggled his brows teasingly at Caroline.

"You sure," Caroline questioned as she rolled her eyes from Damon's smirking face to her best friend.

"Yeah,"

"OK, well I'll just be down stairs… and Stefan and I are both just a scream away," Caroline spoke this as she glared directly at Damon.

"Thanks," Bonnie replied around a giggle. Caroline hesitantly moved to the doorway, throwing a concerned look back at her friend and Damon before she finally crossed the threshold.

"Leave the door op…" Her words were cut off as Damon flashed to the door, slammed it in the blonde's face, and locked it. They could hear Caroline's muffled curses and threats from the other side of the door for a few moments before she walked away.

"I don't know why you goad her so much, when you and I both know you actually like her," Bonnie spoke out as she pushed herself up more comfortably in the bed.

"Yeah but she doesn't know that, and don't ever tell her. 'Sides it's fun getting her riled up. Now that we're besties I have no true desire to irritate and poke fun at you anymore," He said as he pouted dramatically, and then walked to the side of the bed where she lay and flopped down upon it, careful to avoid her outstretched legs.

"Oh you poor thing," Bonnie replied with a smile.

"I'm sorry," Damon spoke out an apology and caused Bonnie to look at him questioningly. "Earlier…if I scared you," He said recalling his reaction to what Kai had announced. "I'm sorry I never meant to scare you, I was just really pissed off."

"You didn't scare me. I knew you wouldn't hurt me," Bonnie quickly replied and the look Damon threw back at her told her that he knew she was lying. "Ok, I admit that when I saw you go all 'Grrr..Argh' I was…concerned."

"I couldn't hurt you Bon-Bon. Killing you would be like killing myself and I am not suicidal," He then fell forward until his upper body covered her lower body, and his head came to rest across her lap. He reached out and let his hands grip at her expanding waist. "Now that Elena is gone you're all I have. You're the only reason I get up most days," He mumbled out, his sincere words stunning Bonnie a bit. She knew they had grown closer, had been ever since they were trapped in Kai's prison world. But she hadn't realized until that moment just how much Damon relied on her and needed her. She moved her hands to his head, buried her fingers in his thick tresses, and began massaging his scalp.

"Elena's not gone," She stated with conviction in her voice as her face held a determined look. "I'm going to fix this Kai is not going to win. He's got some magical skills I'll grant him that but…"

"But you are hands down the biggest, baddest, most powerful, and sometimes very terrifying witch I know and I have met my fair share of witches," Damon said and brought a sweet smile to Bonnie's face.

"You're right, I'm better than he is."

"Damn right you are," Damon chimed in.

"So I will find the spell to fix this. I will awaken Elena and I will end this pregnancy," Bonnie said her mind already coming up with ideas. She was so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't notice the way Damon was staring up at her. With a heavy sigh he extracted himself from her hands and warm body and stood from the bed. A part of Bonnie felt bereave from the loss of his body and she immediately took note of the rigidness in his shoulders and the way he was suddenly avoiding her eyes. She knew she had said something that had upset him, but wasn’t sure what it was exactly.

"I'll just go back to your house and get your grimoire, so you can work on that," Damon responded and then stalked to the door, yanked it open, and nearly mulled over Caroline who was just about to knock on the door. He simply shoved past her and kept on his way, leaving the two baffled females to stare after him for a moment.

"Ok, what's got him in such a mood, did he hurt you?" Caroline asked her eyes bulged out a bit as she moved to Bonnie's side to assess if she had been hurt.

"No, I don't know…I mean I don't know what just happened," Bonnie declared as her eyes remained on the door. "We were just sitting here talking like we usually do, and I was just reassuring him that I would him a way to fix this mess that Kai has created. I told him that I will find or create a spell to counteract what Kai's done. I'll get Elena to wake up and stop this baby from being born."

"Oh," Caroline spoke out as she gently sat on the bed in the spot Damon had occupied.

"Oh…Oh what?" Bonnie asked taking in the look on Caroline's face.

"Bon, you have something that I'd say most vampires would want more than anything else in this world. I know Elena and I would talk about it for hours on end when she was a vampire. The worse thing about being a vampire is the fact that we will never ever have children," Her words came crashing down upon Bonnie.

"Oh Care, I'm so sorry…"

"Oh don't be, I've gotten over it. I mean the trade-off is immortality, right? I will literally be this hot forever. Also I can still adopt if I want children…though it would be hard to explain to them why mommy never grows old," Caroline spoke out getting lost in her own thoughts for a moment. "But my point is you are pregnant right now with Damon's demon spawn," Caroline stated and Bonnie threw her a disapproving glare as she placed her hands protectively against her belly. "Sorry I'm sure it won't have horns or anything. But maybe we we're all wrong in thinking that Damon wanted to kill you and this baby to save Elena. Maybe Damon is actually happy about this baby, and having someone to carry on the Salvatore name and bloodline." Caroline could tell by the shocked look on Bonnie's face that Bonnie hadn't ever considered that idea. "I guess the question is, are you happy about it?"

5 days until full gestation:

"Morning," Damon grumbled out, as he entered the Salvatore kitchen where he found Stefan already seated at the counter drinking his breakfast.

"Hey," Stefan replied frowning up a bit as he took in the elder Salvatore's tired eyes and sluggish movements. "Wow you look like hell," He added and was rewarded with a glared.

"Well, I've spent the past 2 days literally being drained by my insatiable baby momma," Damon stated and Stefan winced as he noticed the fresh bruising on Damon's neck. "And it seems like with every passing hour she needs more and more, so much so that my body can't fully heal itself."

"Sorry, maybe you should try giving her other blood, we just got a fresh stock in," Stefan offered.

"Already did but she just threw it all back up, along with what I had already given her. So she needed twice as much from me to recover," Damon said as he plopped onto the stool beside Stefan and then rested his head upon his folded arms, which rest on top of the counter. "It has to be my blood."

"Damon?" Bonnie's voice drifted into the room from the foyer. Damon groaned a bit as he lifted his tired head up and prepared himself for 'breakfast'.

"I'm in the kitchen Bon-Bon," He called out tiredly and she suddenly appeared at the entrance. Both Damon and Stefan took her in. The sight of her left them both a bit enthralled. Just in the two days since they had learned of Kai's spell Bonnie had moved in with them, and she had changed so drastically. Her hair had grown as quickly as her belly and it now fell down her back and across her shoulders, reaching to her waist. Both her belly and breasts had doubled in size and it was clear that she was well into her 3rd trimester. Then there was her over all aura, it was enchanting and seductive. "Hungry?" Damon asked the question he already knew the answer to.

"Famished," Bonnie replied her eyes already blackened with anticipation.

"OK," Stefan interjected in on the moment as he stood from his seat. "How about you try to feed on me?" He offered and both Bonnie and Damon frowned up a bit at the idea. "You said it yourself, she needs your blood right? Well you also mentioned that Caroline's blood satisfied you for a little while, we can assume that that's because Caroline was turned by your blood, she's in your bloodline. Well, so am I and more so than Caroline. So my blood should be good enough too, right? I can't promise it'll be as tasty as Damon's Bonnie," He spoke this directly to the young witch before focusing back on his brother. "But at least I can substitute so you're not drained dry before we can figure out how to fix this."

"I'll try anything to stop this pain," Bonnie said as she stepped closer to where Stefan stood and looked to Damon as if awaiting his approval.

"Whatever…I could use the break." Damon responded as he dismissively waved his hand.

"How do you want to do this?" Stefan asked. "I mean how would you prefer to do it, from my neck…"

"No, from the wrist," Damon was the one who quickly answered, "It's easier to pry her off there." With a nod Stefan pushed back his right sleeve and held up his right arm to Bonnie. She flashed to him and smoothly sank her fangs into his wrist and began to take deep sips. Stefan's theory had been correct his blood was just as delicious and filling as Damon's. A half gasp, half hiss spilled from Stefan and a slight growl escaped Bonnie's lips as she turned to get a better grip, putting Stefan at her back. She clutched at his arms with both hands and sank her fangs in a little deeper. Stefan grimaced in pain as his hand instinctively reached for Bonnie in an attempt to push her off. His hand landed on the most accessible part of her body, her swollen belly. Damon scowled and shot up from his seat as he became filled with an overwhelming need to rip his brother's head off. A growl filled the room and it was so loud it made both Bonnie and Stefan still in their movements and lock eyes with Damon, who stood staring in full vamp mode.

"What's going on in here?" Ric asked taking in the scene as he and Caroline entered the kitchen from the back entrance, both carried bags of items they had gotten from Bonnie's house.

"Uhm…I was just feeding Bonnie so Damon could have a rest," Stefan answered Alaric though his eyes stayed locked onto his brother. "You're good now right Bon?" He asked as he gently pulled his arm from her grip.

"Yeah," She lied as she released him and stepped away a few paces. She was still a bit hungry but fully understood that if she continued to feed on Stefan things between him and Damon would get volatile, though she didn't fully understand the reason why.

"And why is Damon all fangy?" Caroline asked and her words seemed to bring Damon back to himself and he quickly shook off his vampire mask.

"I'm not sure," Stefan replied also curious himself as to what set his brother off. "Damon, you care to explain?"

"I'm not even sure myself," Damon answered truthfully.

"If it bothers you that Bonnie is taking blood from me, directly from the tap then next time…" Stefan began but Damon cut him off.

"It didn't bother me. I'm actually relieved that you're another food source because no offense Bon-Bon, but you're gluttonous."

"Hey, it's not me it's your demon spawn that wants your blood," She said defensively as she placed her hands on her hips. "Also that's what set you off,"

"What?" Damon asked what everyone else was wondering as all eyes fell to Bonnie.

"The baby, you apparently didn't like Stefan touching the baby," She announced.

"I don't think…" Damon started to protest and to prove her point Bonnie reached out grasped Stefan's hand and placed it against her belly. Again Damon instantly vamped out and let out a low growl. Stefan swiftly yanked his hand back and Damon's feature melted back to his human form.

"Awww that's sweet," Caroline cooed as she moved to stand beside Bonnie. "I wonder…" She then reached out and placed her hand against Bonnie's belly and then looked to see what Damon's reaction would be. This time he didn't change. "OK so my touch doesn't bother you," Bonnie shook her head in acknowledgement. "Ric you try," Caroline said wanting to continue to test her theory. Ric hesitated a moment and then walked over and placed a gentle hand against Bonnie's belly. Then all eyes in the room locked onto Damon, who in turn folded his arms across his chest and rolled his own eyes. "Looks like you're the odd man out Stefan, Damon is only jealous of you."

"I am not jealous…" Damon's words were cut off when Stefan again reached over and this time touched Bonnie's arm. He vamped out but shook it off immediately. "Ok quit it."

"And looks like it's not the baby you don't like me touching, it's Bonnie," The room then fell into an awkward silence. Neither Damon nor Bonnie knew how to respond to the revelation so both remained silent and avoided he other's eyes.

"We got some things from your house." Caroline spoke out to change the subject, and end the awkward silence that was filling the room. "I was able to find all the things you listed; the incenses, crystals. I even got you some clothes but I don't think any of them will fit you. You do know what that means right?"

"That I'm fat," Bonnie tossed out the very thought she had had as she looked at herself in the mirror earlier before dressing in the extra-large t-shirt and sweat pants Damon had lent to her.

"What!? No, sweetie…You are not fat! Besides everybody knows that being fat doesn't count when you're pregnant," Caroline stated and Bonnie couldn't help but to smile at her words. "No, I meant that we get to go shopping. Buy you and the baby some things, and the best part we get to do it all on Damon's dime," She exclaimed excitedly as she and Bonnie both turned to Damon in anticipation, who rolled his eyes slightly and then pulled out in wallet, reached in it and snagged one of his credit cards. Caroline reached for the card, but with a snarl Damon moved the card from her reach.

"Nuh, uh," He spoke as he shook his head. "The card is for Bonnie to use, and Bonnie only," Caroline pouted a bit as Bonnie giggled at her and grasped the card Damon held out to her. "Get whatever you need for you and the baby," He directed to Bonnie.

"Thank you but I don't need much and as for the baby I am still working on a way to reverse this, so..."

"Right, I forgot, if you find the right mojo there won't be a baby. So no worries, right," Damon said as he dropped his eyes to the floor and nodded a bit and then moved to the exit. In that moment Bonnie thought back to what Caroline had suggested to her before. Did Damon actually want the baby to be born? They didn't have much time to think on the matter, there was very little time left in Kai's timeline before their lives would change forever. Bonnie decided she and Damon needed to have a talk and so she excused herself and followed Damon's trek. It wasn't hard to find him in the huge boarding house. In fact the first place she had thought to look had been a success; the study which had the biggest liquor supply. He looked to her as he stood leaning against the large mantle of the even larger blazing fireplace, with a glass of bourbon in his hand. He said nothing but kept his eyes locked to her as she slowly made her way into the room and closed the door behind her. She noticed the way he stared at her letting his eyes settle onto her belly more than they did her eyes. When she first caught him doing that the night they discovered Kai's plan it had made her nervous, scared her even. She thought Damon was internally calculating her and the baby's demise, but now she thought it may have been for an entirely different reason.

"Do you want me to stop trying to de-spell this and keep the baby?" Bonnie asked point blank. She had been successful at reversing the pregnancy spell and reverting back to her taunt belly. But it had only lasted for a few moments, so she hadn't bothered telling anyone about it. But knew she was on the right track. Damon stared into her eyes for a long moment before he finally replied.

"It's your body, so your choice, Bon."

"Damon, you do realize that it would be impossible right? This baby living means Elena doesn't," She added and he rolled his eyes a bit.

"Don't be so dramatic," He huffed out and Bonnie was very astonished by his nonchalant behavior towards the topic of Elena's spell. "Kai didn't say she would die…"

"No, but he said if this baby is born Elena will never wake up, that pretty much sounds like a death sentence to me, Damon," She stated as she moved closer to where he stood by the fire. "And we want her to wake up right? It's what I've been working hard trying to accomplish since she fell asleep, and what you've been whining about from the beginning," He tossed her a slight glare and then took a sip from his glass. "So what's changed?" Her words caused him to frown up and choke a bit on the liquor slipping down his throat.

"What's changed?" He wheezed out as he tried to quell a cough that wanted out. "Everything's changed," He barked out. "You're carrying my child…'my' child Bonnie," He repeated more softly. "Something that I lost over 170 years ago and was sure I'd never ever have, but here you stand. Why would you think it would be so easy for me to choose Elena's life over my child's?"

"Because I have watched you time and time again willingly sacrifice other's in order to protect or save Elena, choosing her well being over everyone else's."

"Yeah well she's not the only one I've gotten my hands bloody for, and she's not always my first choice is she?" Damon said and the night he killed Kai to save her flickered into Bonnie's mind, and filled her with a bit of guilt.

"No, but I think 'that's' a choice that you have often regretted," Bonnie replied and her true assessment made Damon dropped his eyes from hers down to the blaze of the fire. "Also this is not just 'your' child. This is my child too you know," Bonnie tossed out in a huff as she folded her arms as best she could across her bountiful chest. Her words had the results she had hoped for, the somber mood lifted as Damon's demeanor softened and he chuckled slightly.

"Yes, she's your child too and I hope she is as lovely inside and out as her mother is," He said as he raised his glass a bit in a toast. "And there are those things I would like to know…you know? Like will she have your eyes, your nose, your judgmental nature," That last bit made him frown up a bit from sourness.

"Oh I hope she has your eyes, but not your nasty disposition," Bonnie quickly interjected making it known that she had actually thought about their child living. "Damon, you need to really think about this because if I have this baby, if it lives and Elena never wakes up…I don't want you to ever look at this child the way you look at me sometimes," She spoke and he looked a bit confused by her words. "Like you hate that it's here and Elena's not. Hey, I get it I do, you were in love with Katherine for a very long time, and then you met her doppelganger in Elena, and became obsessed…"

"Is that what you think it is?" He asked cutting off her words as he once again stared at her. "That what I feel for Elena is an obsession, and not actual love?" At first Bonnie was set to apologize for the accusation until she noticed the way he looked at her, as if seek an honest opinion from her.

"I don't know Damon only you know what's in your heart," She answered. "God, I cannot believe that we are actually considering this, this is crazy," Bonnie said suddenly as she walked over to the nearby sofa and sat down. "Having a baby…caring for a baby, it's huge…never mind the whole Elena will never wake up, part of it."

"Yeah, but on the up side you become immortal," Damon added as he walked to the sofa and sat down next to her.

"Which I 'had' totally forgotten about, thanks," Bonnie replied as a new panic filled her.

"Oh c'mon, now what's wrong with being drop dead gorgeous and incredibly sexy forever?" Damon asked seemingly unaware of the generous compliment he had just bestowed upon Bonnie as she tried to cover her blushing. "And don't say outliving everyone you care about. Your only living relative and all of your friends are all vampires. Our kid will apparently be immortal as well. So you'll always have our family. As for Elena sleeping forever I guess I am not so worried about it because she was bewitched by Kai," Damon's face held a look of disgust at the name. "Dude was wacko Bon-Bon. I'd put my money on your mojo over his any day. Hell he needed your magic to get out of his prison world, remember? So I have every faith that you will find a way to break his sleeping beauty spell over Elena," Bonnie couldn't help but to smile at Damon's words of encouragement. She actually found them to be empowering.

"Ok," Bonnie spoke out suddenly as she stared at the blazing fire and nodded her head a bit.

"Ok…Ok what?" Damon inquired as he stared at her a bit baffled.

"Ok change of plan," Bonnie said as she looked directly at him. "I'm having this baby first and then I'll make a spell to wake up Elena and cure myself of immortality,” Her words and the determination on her face brought a broad smile to Damon's face. A smile she thought looked more genuine than any she had ever seen from him. "Oh don't look so happy buddy, because having a baby who will turn into a toddler, and then into a teenager is no joke. And don't think all the responsibilities are going to be in my lap either. We will share the load; diaper changing, feedings in the wee hours," She huffed out as she actually mentally began to envision what kind of scheduling she would need to write up for Damon. For his part Damon just sat staring at Bonnie. His proud, happy smile had faded as he continued to stare, and he began to realize something he had never, ever noticed before. Bonnie Sheila Bennett was breathtakingly beautiful and it kind of bothered him that he had never seen it before that moment. He let his eyes rake over her face, studying every inch. Branding her to memory or perhaps looking for some imperfection that just wasn't there. "Actually, I think since I have to carry the baby and go through what I have heard described as excruciating labor pains, I think all the diaper changing and feedings should fall on you," She continued and after not getting any expected protesting from Damon she focused back onto him and found him staring at her with an intensely deep and serious gaze. "What?" She questioned and watched Damon's eyes dart about her face before settling on her mouth. "Wha…" Bonnie began to asked again but her words dissolved into a surprised gasp and then soft moan as Damon covered her mouth with his own.

From the second their mouths melted together neither fought any of the immediate urges that filled them. Damon leaned in closer letting his weight push Bonnie back down against the sofa. Bonnie willingly complied with his advances, and opened her legs to allow Damon to settle more comfortably against her. Damon made sure not to place all of his weight onto Bonnie and their child, so he rested his weight upon his left arm. Then he moved his right hand up and lifted the hem of the oversize shirt he had given her. He brushed his hand across her burgeoning belly, pausing a few seconds at feeling their baby pushing back against his touch. Finally, he reached his goal stopping once he had a handful of Bonnie's supple breast, where he gently squeezed and pinched at her nipple. Bonnie moaned into his mouth as her body instinctively arched to get closer to his touching.

Damon pulled from the kiss with the intention of freeing Bonnie of the garment preventing him from feasting on her breasts. His vampire eyes locked with Bonnie's vampire eyes, and he released a pleased growl that she reciprocated. Damon then cast a feral smile down at Bonnie as she lifted up a little from her prone position to assist Damon with pulling the shirt from her frame. Once the shirt was tossed aside he dropped hungry eyes down upon her pink satin covered breasts. Damon wasted no time diving in and capturing Bonnie's satin covered breast in his mouth, causing Bonnie to arch up from the couch and moan loudly.

"Damon," She gasped out as she reached out and gripped his head, to hold him closer.

"Oh God, Bonnie, no!" Caroline's voice boomed within the room. Damon and Bonnie both turned to face the blonde vampire who stood just in the doorway. "You're under a spell remember? Under normal circumstances you would never, EVER have sex with Damon, and you," She pointed to Damon with a deep scowl on her face. "I am going to assume that you are being affected by the spell too, and not trying to take advantage of the situation. Does the name 'Elena' ring a bell? She's your girlfriend and your best friend, Bon," Elena's name had the same effect as a cold bucket of water. Both guilty parties quickly parted, Damon moved from Bonnie as he reached down and grasped the shirt she had been wearing and handed it to her. Bonnie hastily redressed and they both stood from the sofa. Bonnie made her way to the exit as Damon made a beeline to the bar to make himself several drinks. "What were you thinking young lady?" Caroline chastised as Bonnie passed her, and she followed her out of the study.

The Next Morning:

He awoke with a start and as if his body had a mind of its own, he trekked through the upstairs of the house until he stopped at Bonnie's bedroom door. He knocked slightly as he opened the door. He was surprised to see the bed made and the room emptied. He took a moment to let his senses search for Bonnie and when he couldn't sense her anywhere in the house, he became nervous and concerned. He flashed down to the kitchen where he knew Stefan was. "Where's Bonnie?"

"She and Caroline went shopping," Stefan stated as he continued sipping at his breakfast. "Apparently, all the stuff they got yesterday wasn't enough. Honestly, I kind of got the feeling that neither of them wanted to be in the house, you got any idea why?" The younger Salvatore questioned as he quirked his eyebrows up while regarding his brother.

"What, vampire Barbie didn't tell you?" Damon grumbled out as he moved to fix himself a mug of blood.

"No. I did ask her about it, and she told me to ask you. So, this is me asking you."

"Yesterday she walked in on me and Bonnie," This was all that Damon indulged, as he took a seat across the counter from his younger brother.

"Walked in on you two doing what?" Stefan asked with his face screwed up in genuine confusion. Damon simply tossed him an expression that explained all. "You're joking right? I mean I can see you doing that sure, but not Bonnie. Hooking up with her best friend's boyfriend is not something she'd ever do … Well, not unless she was under some kind of spell. So, was it some residual mojo from before?" Damon simply shook his head no. "Ok, then what the hell did you do to her Damon?"

"What?" Damon's face held a surprised look as he stared over at his younger brother. "I didn't do anything that Bonnie wasn't a willing participant in." Damon replied slightly peeved by his brother's implication.

"Right, because compelling a woman to have sex with you is totally beneath you."

"My God, will you tell Caroline to get over it already. Besides, I would never do that to Bonnie," Stefan only nodded his head at Damon's words. Over the past year he had seen with his own eyes how close Damon and Bonnie had gotten, and he knew his brother well enough to know that he would never willingly hurt someone he cared deeply for. Although, he still had a tendency to hurt them under the guise of helping or protecting them. "What I want to know is why the hell you let Bonnie go out without feeding first?"

"She fed, and she's ravenous. This is my third cup of blood to replenish my blood loss," Stefan said not noticing the way Damon scowled at him.

"You fed her?" Damon half spoke, half growled, and the tone was enough to capture Stefan's attention, causing the younger Salvatore to lock eyes with the older one.

"Yeah, I thought that we agreed that would be best, to help relieve you," Stefan defended. "Bonnie came to me this morning and asked. What did you want me to do, tell her no?" He added as if to shift blame.

"Well, thank you little brother, but from now on I'll be feeding Bonnie."

"I don't think that's a good idea." Bonnie's voice filled the room and both brothers turned to see her and Caroline entering the kitchen. Bonnie paused at the door, while Caroline moved to where Stefan sat. "I mean I'll take your blood, because apparently I need it for the baby, but I won't be feeding from you anymore, Damon. Caroline and I stopped by the hospital and 'borrowed' a few things so you can do transfusions, and maybe even you could donate some blood too Stefan."

"Sure," Stefan replied as he nodded in agreement.

"Me too," Caroline chimed in with a huge smile on her face.

"Ok, so this way we can stock up, and I don't have to take so much from you Damon," Bonnie continued as she felt the heat from his gaze burn into her.

"I don't mind, I'll give whatever you and 'our' baby needs," Damon spoke and Bonnie noted how his glare darkened, and it made her squirm a bit under his heavy gaze.

"Well, I think it's a brilliant idea, and I'm glad I thought of it," Caroline spoke up, and Damon turned and locked a death glare onto her. Stefan instinctively stood and casually placed himself in between the two of them. "After what happened yesterday it's obvious that Kai's spell is doing something to both of you, still making you want to … hook up," She added with a soured look on her face. "In situations like this, I think you two should just avoid each other altogether, which is why Bonnie should come stay with me."

"No," Damon said so calmly that everyone else in the room stilled, and quietly regarded him. "You should definitely leave Caroline, because right now I think I might hurt you if you stayed," Caroline flinched a bit at his words, because she felt the truth in them. "But Bonnie and my child are staying here, where they belong. Isn't that right, Bon-Bon?" Damon asked as he once again turned his eyes back onto Bonnie, and she could see the rage, anger, and hurt in them.

"Y-yes," Bonnie complied to appease him, never taking her eyes from his.

"Good," Damon replied happily as he turned back to the counter with a broad smile on his face. "Glad that's settled. Now, if you'll excuse us," He then lifted the cup and finished off his breakfast, sat it back atop the counter, and then turned and moved to where Bonnie stood. "Bonnie and I need to talk," He gently but firmly grasped her arm and began to move them to the exit that led to the living room. Caroline took a step to intervene, which caused Damon to shoot a warning look to his younger brother. Stefan in turn reached out and grabbed Caroline's arm.

"It's ok, Caroline." He spoke softly to her.

"But..." Caroline started to protest but Stefan cut her off.

"They're just going to talk, like he said," She settled down a bit at his calming words.

"Ok, fine," Caroline conceded. "But if you need me Bon, just scream," Bonnie tossed her beloved friend a smile and a nod as she allowed Damon to pull her from the Kitchen.

A moment later:

"I won't let you do it, so you better get that idea out of your head," Damon declared as he released his hold on Bonnie and moved to the bar in the corner to make himself a stiff drink. Bonnie stood staring at him baffled by his words.

"Do what?" She questioned.

"Take my child from me," He answered as he quickly tossed back his drink and then proceeded to pour himself another one. "If you want to leave, fine, but not until after the baby is born," His words royally pissed Bonnie off, and she placed her hands on her hip and took a step closer to him.

"Excuse me? Just who in the hell do you think you are?"

"Her father," He stated as he pointed to her belly.

"Well, I'm her mother and there's no way in hell I'm leaving her with you to raise alone."

"Come off it Bon-Bon, you don't even want her. Hell, just yesterday you were planning to find a way to get rid of her," Damon barked back at her.

"For your information I already have the spell to end this pregnancy, I finished writing it up last night, yet here I am still very pregnant," Bonnie said and she could see by the expression on Damon's face that she had shocked him.

"So, even after telling me yesterday that you would keep her, you really don't want to keep her?" He asked the hurt evident in his voice, though his face gave nothing away.

"It's not that."

"Then what is it exactly?"

"This is a spell Damon," Bonnie said as she placed both of he hands upon her belly. "This is a means to keep Elena asleep forever and torture us in the process. I know you said that you want this baby, but I also know that sometimes, and it might be a fleeting millisecond, but sometimes you wish you hadn't picked my life over Elena's," Damon remained silent. "I don't want this baby to ever look into your eyes and see that regret from you, because I can tell you from experience it really hurts," He had to avert his eyes from Bonnie's tear filled one. "So, I finished the spell just in case you changed your mind before she's born. As for me I try not to think of this baby as anything except some pawn in Kai's game, just a spell he cooked up."

"Bon, I won't lie and say that I've never thought about pushing you out in front of a speeding car."

"Yeah, thanks for that memory," She tossed in as she rolled her eyes and huffed out a bit as she folded her arms across her chest.

"My point is," He continued to speak as he moved out from behind the bar and moved to stand before her. "That it was just the once, I swear to God I've never had those kind of thoughts since, and when I did have that thought it was a fleeting millisecond like you said.."

"C'mon Damon I've seen it in your eyes since then."

"You mean when we're hanging out and I'm all happy one second and then broody the next?"

"Yeah, exactly," She confirmed with a nod of her head. "The regret pours off of you."

"Bon-Bon, it's not regret about choosing you over Elena. It's a revelation and maybe a little guilt too, because I suddenly realize in those moments with you that I'm happy and I'm not even thinking about Elena. When I'm with you, I'm happy 'without' Elena," His confession stunned her into silence as she stared at him in awe. "See, now you've got that same look on your face. And another thing, this baby," He placed both of his hands on her swollen middle. "She's not a spell," Bonnie's face scowled up as she opened her mouth to defend her beliefs, but he quieted her by shaking his head to allow him to continue. "Kai's spell made my sperm viable and made us irresistible to one another, but he didn't just conjure her up and put her inside of you. We created her Bonnie, you and me. The means may have been unusual, and he seemed to have sprinkled her with Miracle-Gro, but the conception was done the old-fashioned way. She's all ours, not Kai's, so it's ok for you to want her and to love her," Damon leaned down and placed a gentle kiss against her forehead, and then he turned and walked out of the room, leaving Bonnie to stew on his words.

When Damon re-entered the kitchen alone Caroline noticed and she quickly went in search of Bonnie. Bonnie hadn't moved from her spot in the study, where she stood lovingly rubbing her hands across her very swollen belly. "Bonnie?" Caroline's voice filtered in from the corridor, and Bonnie quickly wiped away the tears that had fallen from her eyes as she thought about the child within her, her baby, 'their' baby. "There you are," Caroline said as she entered the room looking visibly relieved, but then that relief quickly turned to concern when she noticed her friend had been crying. "What's wrong?" She asked as she hurried over to where Bonnie stood. "What happened? Did Damon do someth…"

"No," Bonnie quickly interjected not wanting any further feuding between her two friends, knowing that it would only end up with one or both of them being badly hurt. "Damon didn't do anything except…"

"Except what?" Caroline probed readying to go tear into the older vampire.

"Except make me realize that I don't have to feel guilty or be sorry anymore," Bonnie began to explain but could tell by the look on Caroline's face that she didn't understand. "I want this baby Care…my baby. I want my baby," Bonnie announced as she smiled and fresh tears spilled from her eyes. "I love Elena but I love my baby more, and if I have to choose I choose Bella."

"Bella?" Caroline repeated slightly confused.

"Your goddaughter, Isabella Noel Bennett," Bonnie replied beaming with pride as she tapped her fingers against her belly. An excited smile spread across Caroline's face as well.

"Oh, that's so beautiful. I love it," Caroline cooed as she moved closer and rubbed her hands across Bonnie's belly.

"Salvatore!" Damon's voice boomed all the way from the kitchen. Both Bonnie and Caroline rolled their eyes and moved to comfortably sit on the sofa to continue their conversation.

"I'm proud of you Bonnie Bennett," Caroline started as she settled into the chair.

"For what?" Bonnie questioned as she tossed her friend a curious look.

"For finally putting your happiness first, it's long overdue and about time," Caroline replied.

"Thanks and this doesn't mean that I'm giving up on Elena," Bonnie assured and Caroline simply nodded her head, she hadn't thought for a second that Bonnie would. "I will find a way to undo Kai's sleeping beauty spell."

"I never doubted it for a minute, but…" Caroline trailed off a bit really not wanting to ruin her friend's motivation.

"What?" Bonnie asked in fascination.

"Have you thought about how you're going to handle things … when Elena wakes up I mean, you know, with you having Damon's child and all?" The question was enough to cause all the fears and doubt Bonnie had initially had to come crashing back in on her. "You know Elena, she'll say she's okay with it but it's going to hurt her knowing that you and Damon actually conceived a child together, and it won't matter that it was because of some spell." Before Bonnie could allow herself to have a panic attack, a different fear gripped her as she sat staring at a vamped out Damon, who had a death grip around the necks of both Caroline and Stefan. He had both dangling in the air like they were rag dolls, but his death glare was locked solely onto Caroline's face. Bonnie wasn't fully sure of what had occurred. One second she was talking with Caroline and the next Damon had flashed into the room faster than she had ever seen before and grabbed Caroline. Then, Stefan flashed into the room, and Bonnie guessed it was with the intent to protect Caroline but he hadn't been fast enough, and Damon grabbed him up too.

"You know, you're really starting to piss me off Vampire Barbie," Damon growled out as his black menacing eyes glowered at Caroline, who was panic-stricken as she clawed at his hand as she tried to find release.

"Damon … Stop." Those words were all that Stefan could gasp out as he too fought against his brother's unyielding hold.

"Sorry little brother, but I told her she should leave because I won't have her upsetting Bonnie. She didn't listen and now look she's upset Bonnie," Damon growled out as he purposely tightened his hold on Caroline.

"I'm not upset," Bonnie's calm voice cut in. She could see a little bit of tension leave Damon's shoulders but she also knew that he was still very mad and libel to do real harm to both Caroline and Stefan. "I'm fine Damon," She continued to speak in a soft calming tone as she stood and moved to where he was. "We're both fine." The human mask once again fell upon Damon's face as he turned to look at the beautiful witch before him. "Here, feel, she's really bouncing around right now," Bonnie spoke true words. It felt like Bella was doing gymnastics in her belly, and somehow she knew that it was because her baby was agitated by the things going on around her. Damon locked his eyes to Bonnie's belly with a slight smile, and a smile played at Bonnie's lips as well because she could see that she was soothing him. She hoped he would take the bait to feel their daughter, and in turn free both Caroline and Stefan. However, the loud snap that filled the room stunned Bonnie, and her eyes widened as they watched Damon drop Caroline's lifeless body a second before he also released Stefan, who flashed to his girlfriend before her body hit the floor. She had been so surprised that she hadn't even felt Damon's touch, or had enough wits about her to shun him for his actions. "I can't believe you just did that." Bonnie gasped out as she frowned up in disgust at his actions.

"Really?" Damon asked as he frowned up a bit. "And I thought we were best friends and you were supposed to know me better than anyone," Damon mocked as he moved both his hands about Bonnie's belly trying to chase down Bella's movements, all with a huge goofy smile on his face. The look on his face made her pause and lifted nearly all the anger she had just felt towards him for what he had done.

"You didn't have to snap Caroline's neck that was immature Damon," She tossed out.

"Well, I wanted to snatch her heart out but I refrained myself, for you and my little brother. Once upon a time I would have ripped her heart right out and devoured it without a care in the world. So, I think just snapping her neck was very mature of me Bon-Bon," Damon declared and she had to giggle at seeing that he really was expecting some kind of praise for his 'chivalrous' act. She rolled her eyes as her smile deepened.

"You're right, I'm so proud of you Damon. Who's a good vampire?" She said in a playful, mocking tone as she reached up and scratched through the hair behind his left ear, to which Damon only chuckled and tossed back a wink.

"You do know you're enabling his behavior, right?" Stefan spoke out as he lifted Caroline up into his arms and then moved to settle her on the couch. "This was a bit dramatic even for you Damon."

"She was forewarned, not my fault she didn't listen. You dear brother have a very meddlesome girlfriend. You should teach her to mind her own business," Damon stated.

"She's just concerned about Bonnie, we all are."

"Well, don't be. She's mine," Damon spoke with such conviction and finality that Stefan stilled the words he had intended to say. As for Bonnie, she had tired on day one of arguing that very point with Damon, and so she remained silent. "I won't let anything happen to her or our baby, and that includes Caroline stirring up shit that will upset her. I want her gone, brother."

"Well, this is not just your house Damon, and Caroline is welcome to come here whenever she wants."

"Fine," Damon replied almost pleasantly which caused both Stefan and Bonnie to cast a skeptical eye at him.

"Wait, that's it? We're not going to argue about it, or come to blows over it?" Stefan asked in disbelief.

"Nope, you want Caroline to stay, fine, Bonnie and I will leave."

"We will?" Bonnie questioned as Damon smoothly gripped her arm near the elbow and guided them to the exit.

"Yes, so why don't you go get a few things you feel you'll need, and then we'll head out," Damon instructed and Bonnie nodded and quickly flashed up to the guest room to grab her grimoire and a few essential articles of clothing. She decided not to make a big fuss over Damon taking her away. The truth was she felt like she needed to get away to clear her head a bit. Also, she had to admit that Caroline's constant discouraging comments about Damon and their new strange family were becoming a bit vexing.

"Where are you going?" Stefan asked as he followed Damon into the foyer where they waited on Bonnie's return.

"To the Hotel Nunya," Damon responded coolly as Bonnie flashed back down to them and he helped her into one of the Jackets she brought that would cover her belly. He then took the items she had packed up and opened the door.

"There is no Hotel Nun … Very funny Damon," Stefan chastised as he watched his brother and Bonnie exit out the front door. "What if I need to reach you?" Damon didn't reply as he closed the door behind them.

A little while Later:

Damon had wanted to leave Mystic Falls and get a hotel in the next town over, but in the end, Bonnie had convinced him that her home was the best option. He had only relented after she promised to put up a spell that would keep Caroline out, which she obliged him. After they arrived Damon quickly moved to the kitchen and returned with a large glass of blood. Bonnie thought of asking him where he had gotten it but then noticed the blood that stained the cuff of his shirt.

"Thank you," She mumbled out as she took the glass and proceeded to take it all down in just a couple of gulps.

"You can have more after your bath. I'll just go run one for you," Damon said as he made for the stairs. Bonnie watched his retreating form for a moment and she shook her head at the realization that Damon could actually be very considerate when he chose to be. In the past couple of days, she had been quite pampered with him literally waiting on her hand and foot. At first, she had protested but that had become too exhausting because he would never relent, and so she had to.

She hadn't soaked in the bath as long as she normally would have. The truth of the matter was that her belly had gotten so big she felt quite uncomfortable in her own body. Her breasts were now constantly tender and sore. Her lower back always ached. Her feet were swollen. When she got out of the tub and dried off she hadn't even bother with her robe which she knew would no longer fit, she simply put on the black satin bra and panties Damon had sat on the counter for her. She seated herself on the toilet with the intention of putting on lotion to moisturize her skin, but she could only huff and puff as she found that she couldn't reach her legs and feet.

"Come lie on the bed Bon, and I'll help you," Damon's voice filtered through the door, and she jumped slightly in surprise even though she had already sensed his presence. She stood and exited her bathroom back into her bedroom where she found Damon in a prone position at the foot of her bed, with his eyes closed and hugging Ms. Cuddles.

"What have I told you about molesting Ms. Cuddles?" She teased as she moved to the bed with her lotion in hand.

"Hey, we're old friends. We comforted each other every night while you were stuck in…" Damon spoke out as he opened his eyes and sat up, but his words faltered a moment as he took in the Nubian Goddess who stood before him in just her underwear. Bonnie immediately became self-conscious under his eyes raking over her frame.

"Please do not make any comments about my size because believe me I know how huge and grotesque I look right now. Hopefully, once Bella is born everything will snap back to the way it was before."

"You're beautiful, Bon. Abso-fucking-lutely breathtaking," He said in a near whisper as he stared at her enthralled. "I don't think I've ever seen anything more beautiful in my entire life."

"Thank you," Bonnie said coyly as her entire body suddenly felt hot all over. "Here," She held out the tube of lotion breaking the enchanting moment as she moved to the bed and settled down beside him. "I couldn't get my legs or feet," Damon smirked as he grasped the lotion from Bonnie's hand. He then slid down to the floor at her feet. "What are you doing?" Bonnie asked as she stared down at him curiously. In reply, Damon opened the tub of lotion and squeezed some into his hand. He placed the tube on the floor next to him and then began to rub the lotion between his hands hoping to warm it a bit. He started at her left foot taking it in his hands and rubbing the lotion all over it. He then began a slow trek up to her ankle, then to her calf, and finally up to her thigh. Bonnie's breath caught in her throat as she sat enthralled with Damon's blue eyes locked onto her green ones.

"You know, I dream about this," He said in a lowered voice even though they were the only ones in the house. "Of touching you like this. Tasting you and being inside you again. God," He dropped his mouth to her thigh as he closed his eyes and placed a kiss there. Bonnie's back arched as her head fell back, mouth fell open, and she moaned out a bit. "The way it felt to be inside you, to have you wrapped around me," He stealthily moved up her body pushing her back upon the bed with his actions. He made sure to rest most of his weight on his left arm while his right hand acquainted itself with her supple body.

"Damon," Bonnie hissed out as she gyrated slightly beneath him.

"Tell me do you think about our time together Bonnie?" Damon questioned in a demanding tone just before he sucked on her left satin covered nipple.

"Y…yes." She complied easily as her hands fisted the comforter and her breathing increased with her excitement.

"You know this isn't a spell this time?" He continued as he leaned up and nuzzled her neck, nipping and kissing the sensitive skin there. "Say you want me."

"I want you, Damon," Bonnie finally confessed what she had been feeling ever since they had had sex in the bathroom, and was rewarded with Damon's mouth upon hers, devouring her.

Back at the Salvatore House:

"Alaric?" Stefan called out from the threshold of the open door, baffled to see his friend at such a late hour.

"We have a problem," Alaric huffed out as he moved past Stefan and stalked into the house. Stefan closed the door and followed his friend into the living room where Caroline was waiting for him by the fire. "Where's Damon and Bonnie?"

"They left a couple of hours ago, why? What's going on?" Caroline questioned as she stood and moved to the two men in the room. Alaric held up a VHS tape.

"This was just delivered to my house. It has the same handwriting as the other one," Alaric explained.

"Kai," Stefan spat out as he rolled his eyes slightly.

"Yep, it seems he's not done toying with our lives."

"Well, what's on it?" Caroline asked.

"I haven't watched it, couldn't since I brought the only VCR I had here."

"So let's watch it," Stefan said as he moved to Alaric, grasped the tape, and moved to the VCR.

It felt frenzied yet tender, delirious but delicious. Every touch, lick, and kiss pushed them both closer to an abyss both were sure they'd never be able to fully return from.

"Damon," Bonnie panted out as she pushed at the vampire who was once again latched onto her neck giving her one hell of a hickey. "We have to stop."

"No, we don't," Damon replied as he lifted up and looked into her eyes. "C'mon Bon-Bon, I want you and you want me. There's no spell now, so no Kai manipulating us."

"Damon," Bonnie groaned out as she scowled at him and tried to push him off, but he held his ground.

"Just stop thinking so much for once and just do what you feel. Be selfish for once in your life, Bonnie Bennett, and do what you want. I know you want me and I want you just as much."

"I…I think…" She tried to speak but Damon silenced her by placing a finger to her lips, readying to give her a speech to try and convince her. However, the pained look on her face stopped him. "Oh my God!" Bonnie cried out as she clutched Damon's forearm and dug her nails in. "I think she's coming," Bonnie finally huffed out, her chest heaving with her heavy breaths. Damon's enlarged blue eyes drifted down to Bonnie's belly.

"But wait … There's more!" Kai's mocking words and gloating face filled the screen.

"What now?" Alaric asked as his chest began to tighten with the anticipation of the new horrors Kai had in store for them.

"This is my backup plan to my other backup plan," Kai started explaining. "I've come to learn that I shouldn't expect Bonnie and Damon to suddenly play fair. I mean, if you're watching this then they didn't do any of the things that I had expected them to do. So, I really sat and thought about my question, would Damon be able to kill the woman he loved to save the woman he's obsessed with?" He paused a moment, pursed his lips, and then shook his head. "In the end, I've decided to break the sleeping spell. Yeah, yeah, I know I said it couldn't be broken even by me, I lied, sorry. But, why should Elena suffer, when the only ones I really want to suffer are Damon and Bonnie?"

"I don't believe it, there's got to be a catch," Stefan said skeptically.

"No, really…I mean it." Kai spoke again as if he were speaking directly to Stefan. "Whether Damon kills Bonnie or not Elena will awaken. If Damon kills Bonnie, Elena will awaken immediately. But if Damon doesn't kill Bonnie and allows their spawn to actually be born, Bonnie and said child, once she reaches 18, will both become immortal, as I said before. Oh, and Elena will awaken soon after the child's birth. So you see, either way, I still win. If Damon kills Bonnie, Elena will never ever forgive him and he'll lose them both. However, if Damon and Bonnie have their child and become like some immortal Addams Family, Elena will no doubt feel betrayed and they'll both lose her. Man, I am a diabolical genius!" Kai laughed out as pure joy and excitement spread across his face.

"This guy is truly twisted." Stefan declared.

"Yeah, but he's right," Caroline interjected. "Damon is obsessed with all things Elena and Bonnie is obsessed with everyone else's happiness except her own, especially Elena's. Losing Elena will probably just make Damon more drunk and homicidal than usual, but Bonnie. I don't want to think about what it will do to Bonnie if she loses Elena's friendship over this."

"Ok, now, what do we do?" Damon asked as he sat frozen in fear as Bonnie cried and squirmed against the bed in obvious pain.

"I need to push. I need to get her out," Bonnie whined out an answer as she pulled at the bedspread and bit her bottom lip when another contraction hit. "Help me take off my panties." Damon quickly obliged her, moving down and carefully helping Bonnie to rise up, and then gliding the undergarments down her hips and thighs. Just a moment before, he had envisioned doing this very thing but with a very different outcome. His eyes doubled in size and his mouth fell open slightly as he looked down and saw the top of a tiny head covered in a thick mass of dark curls.

"Uh, Bon-Bon," He stuttered out as he looked on in awe and amazement.

"Ahhhhhh!" She screamed out as she sat up a little and bore down, pushing with all of her might.

"By the way," Kai lifted his left arm and frowned up a bit as he stared at his wristwatch. "Time is almost up. I really hope you guys didn't do something twisted like put Elena in a coffin and bury her somewhere for safe keeping. Could you imagine that? I'd be horrified if I woke up in a coffin and had to dig my way out." The screen then suddenly froze, stilling Kai's smirking face in the frame.

"Oh my God," Caroline cried out.

"Don't worry we'll go and get Elena's coffin and bring it here," Stefan spoke as he placed a comforting hand on Caroline's arm. "You see if you can reach Bonnie, we might need her to break whatever spell she placed on the coffin."

"Okay," Caroline agreed with a nod and she stood for a moment and watched as Stefan and Alaric rushed out the house. She then moved to her purse, grabbed her cell, and called Bonnie. "C'mon Bonnie pick up."

"Jesus, Bon, she's almost out and she's so tiny," Damon said as he gently held onto the head and shoulders of his daughter. Tears freely streamed from his eyes and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as his eyes traced over every inch of their daughter's little frame. "One more push baby, just one more push." Bonnie was exhausted and her body was completely wet from her blood, sweat, and tears. She gripped both her knees to brace herself and then she pushed as hard as she could, not letting up until she heard Damon. "She's out, I've got her!" He exclaimed as he clutched Bella's tiny lethargic body in his hands. He quickly cut the cord and tied it off with the scissors and a ribbon he had managed to grab from Bonnie's vanity earlier and then wrapped Bella in the towel he had gotten from the bathroom. Bonnie collapsed back upon her pillows and cried softly as she also laughed in joy. In a split second her happiness turned into fear when the quietness touched her ears. She lifted her head a bit to see Damon now standing with his back to her. She could see his arms and shoulders moving somewhat sporadically, and heard him speaking in a hushed tone.

"What's wrong? Is she okay?" She asked but Damon didn't speak as he took hurried steps to her bathroom. Bonnie could sense something was terribly wrong because she didn't hear Bella crying out, but found that she was completely drained. She could barely move and it seemed that not only her energy but even her magic had left her. "Damon!" She screamed out at him as he disappeared into the bathroom. "Bring me, my baby. I want my baby, Damon! Please," She sobbed out as she collapsed back onto the pillow and began to cry inconsolably.

An hour later at the Salvatore Boarding House:

"Oh thank God you're back," Caroline spoke out as she met Stefan and Alaric at the door. They walked in, each carrying one end of Elena's coffin. They all moved into the living room where they settled the coffin on the large coffee table.

"Why, what's wrong? We're you able to reach Bonnie?"

"No, that's the problem I can't reach Bonnie or Damon," She answered.

"Damn it Damon," Stefan cursed as he pulled out his cell with the intention to call his brother. His actions were stilled at the loud banging coming from the front door. "Who the hell could that be?" Stefan wondered out loud.

"Maybe it's Bonnie and Damon coming back?" Alaric offered as they all crossed the threshold from the living room and stare down the corridor towards the door.

"Damon wouldn't knock and the door's not locked anyway," Stefan replied and then all three of them jumped slightly when another banging filled the house, but this time it was coming from the living room. They all turned and stared at the coffin. Then the banging at the door and the coffin came again but this time more frantically, causing them all to move into action. "I'll get the door, you two see if you can open that coffin," Stefan commanded as he hurried to the front door, while Alaric and Caroline rushed back into the living room to open the coffin. Stefan yanked the front door open and was stunned as well as relieved to see Damon standing there. Then he became filled with concerned when he noticed that Damon looked like he was coming down from a major hangover and he was carrying Bonnie who was sound asleep but still looked visibly pale and worn out. She was still wrapped up in the coat that she had left in. "What happen?" He asked as he moved aside and allowed them to enter.

"It's been one hell of a night little brother," Damon said as he moved to the living room intending to settle Bonnie onto the large sofa there, and then make himself several stiff drinks.

"Yeah, same here," Stefan stated as he followed. "Damon, something's happened."

"Elena?" Damon gasped out as he stood in the doorway to the living room. He stood staring in shock for a second before he turned slightly and settled Bonnie into Stefan's secure arms. Bonnie who had awoken from the jostling, asked Stefan to put her down and he settled her gently to her feet but hugged her to his side because he could see she wasn't quite steady on her feet.

"Damon?" Elena's soft voice filled the room and every pair of eyes in the room locked onto her. She had only just stepped from the coffin and was still in a state of confusion about where she was and what was happening. Hearing Damon call her name made things come back into focus. "Damon," She called to him again as he moved to stand before her. He cupped her face in his hands as his eyes roamed over her face as if they couldn't believe what they were seeing. She laughed softly as tears fell from her eyes. She then leaned up and pulled him into a sweet kiss, which Damon hungrily deepened in his excitement at actually holding Elena in his arms again. The need for air made Elena pull from their kiss and rest her head against his chest as he held her in a tight embrace. It was then that her eyes fell to the other person that she had most desired to see. "Bonnie," She called and out her wet eyes crinkled up as a huge smile spread across her face. Bonnie's face held a near exact expression as she looked at her best friend overjoyed. "Oh, Bonnie," Elena rushed to her friend and quickly pulled her into a tight embrace. Bonnie began to reciprocate but suddenly pulled back when the tiny baby swaddled against her chest in the baby sling Damon had made, began to wail. Bonnie opened the coat she was wearing to check on her daughter as Damon flashed to her side and stared down at Bella in concern. Everyone else in the room stared on silently as they watched Bonnie and Damon both make a fuss over the baby, with Elena being the only one looking on totally confused. She stepped closer and reached out and carefully pulled the sling back to expose more of the tiny child's face. "Oh Bon-Bon, she's beautiful," Elena exclaimed having no doubt that the gorgeous caramel complexion child belonged to Bonnie. Bonnie couldn't help but smile with pride despite the situation. When Bella opened her eyes the endearing smile that had been on Elena's face instantly faded as she looked down and saw very familiar blue eyes looking back at her. "Oh my God," She gasped out as she looked over at Damon.

"I just can't believe this is happening," Elena spoke out as she stood near the hearth staring down into the blazing fire. Both Bonnie and Caroline sat on the nearby sofa, while Damon, Stefan, and Alaric had retreated to the kitchen to give the ladies some alone time.

"I'm sorry Elena," Bonnie spoke out and Caroline quickly interjected with a frown marring her face.

"You don't have to apologize, Bonnie, this is not your fault. This is all Kai's doing, 'all' of it, so you don't have anything to feel sorry about. I'm sure Elena sees that too, right Elena?" Caroline coaxed and both she and Bonnie sat silently awaiting a reply. After a moment Elena shook her head as if to clear it, wiped away tears that had been falling from her eyes, and then turned to her friends with the bravest smile she could muster on her face.

"Yes, of course," Elena finally said as she hugged herself and nodded her head. "It's just a lot to take in."

"Yeah, I've only had a couple of weeks to get used to it myself," Bonnie stated and upon seeing the confused look on Elena's face she began to explain in detail about what Kai had done.

In the kitchen:

"How are you holding up?" Stefan asked as he moved just beside his older brother and placed a comforting hand onto Damon's shoulder.

"Yeah, you've just become a father...congratulations by the way. She is really beautiful," Alaric said as he raised the glass of juice he held in his hand in a toast. Damon briefly threw back a proud smile and then fixed his eyes back to the island top, where he was seated. "And you've gotten Elena back. That must be a lot to process."

"Yeah, and, I don't know, I was kind of expecting you to be way more happier than you are about getting Elena back," Stefan added.

"Oh, I am happy little brother, more than you will ever know," Damon responded solemnly as he took a sip of the whiskey he was holding.

"But...it's not 'just' about Elena anymore, right?" Stefan asked and in reply Damon briefly arched his right brow, and then tossed back the rest of his drink.

In the Living room:

"God, you must have been so scared," Elena said softly, her genuine concern written all over her face and in her voice.

"Yeah," Bonnie agreed as she nodded and sniffed back tears. "But I wasn't alone," She then reached over and grasped Caroline's hand, who in turn gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"She truly is beautiful Bon. She does have...Damon's eyes," Elena faltered a bit with the words but quickly covered with a faux smile. "But everything else is all you," She complemented.

"Thank God for that," Caroline exclaimed and earned a smile and slight eye roll from both of her friends.

"What's her name?" Elena inquired curiously as she stared intensely at the mass of dark curls just peeking out from the sling that held the baby nestled to Bonnie's bosom.

"Isabella Noel Bennett-Salvatore," Bonnie replied as she pulled the covering down a bit and gazed lovingly at her sleeping daughter, not noticing the hurt that Elena's eyes held at hearing Damon's surname attached. "We just call her Bella."

"Which is a perfect name because she is so very beautiful," Caroline cooed as she brushed a thumb across Bella's cheek, which the baby didn't seem to care for as she quickly opened her vibrant blue eyes and began to wail. "Aww, baby, don't cry," Caroline tried to soothe as Bonnie stood and pulled the sling off to fully access her baby and to comfort her.

"What's wrong?" Damon's voice interrupted the moment as he flashed into the room with a scowl on his face. He moved to where Bonnie now stood in the middle of the room lovingly rocking Bella. He then shot a quick glance from his daughter, to Elena, and then back to his daughter. His behavior holding a suspiciousness that Elena took note of.

"I think your daughter's hungry," Bonnie answered. "All she's done since being born is sleep."

"Well, during all the shopping sprees you two had you did get formula, right? I'll go make her a bottle, just tell me where everything is," Damon offered as he reached down and stroked his daughter's thick curls, his words took both Elena and Caroline by surprise. As for Bonnie she had discovered way back when they were both stuck in Kai's prison that Damon Salvatore could be quite considerate when he wanted.

"Yes, we've got plenty of formula," Bonnie replied as she nestled their child in one arm and used her free hand to push down the loose flowing peasant blouse she wore and freed her breast. Something very primal and sensual stirred in Damon as he watched her unable to look away. If Bonnie noticed Damon's hungry eyes or felt uncomfortable under his gaze she never let on. Her full focus seemed to be on Bella. However, from where she stood, Elena could see how Damon stared and she was very familiar with what she saw having been on the receiving end of those heated looks. "Caroline has kind of talked me into trying to breastfeed her first," Bonnie said as she and Damon both looked on in amazement at how quickly Bella latched on and began suckling. "Well, that was easier than I thought it was going to be," A proud smile spread across both Bonnie and Damon's face.

"I told you it would be," Caroline spoke out from her spot on the sofa. "Women are built for breastfeeding and I read somewhere that babies are born instinctively knowing how to do it, so there's really not much to it."

"Wow, she's hungry," Damon stated as he smirked down at Bella's frantic suckling.

"She's not the only one," Bonnie replied around a heavy sigh causing Damon to turn his now concerned eyes onto her. "But I can't decide what I want more food or sleep."

"Sleep, c'mon I'm putting you two to bed," Damon commanded as he protectively wrapped his arm around Bonnie's waist, knowing that she would need his full support trekking up the staircase.

"My God," Caroline said as she hoped up and moved to the exit heading for the kitchen. "You did just give birth you must be exhausted. I'll go and fix you something light, like some soup, Ok?"

"Thanks Care," Bonnie called out as Damon led her from the room, leaving one lonely soul behind to watch them while feeling devastated. Elena didn't have long to waddle in her loneliness because Alaric soon entered the room and walked over to her.

"Hey," He spoke softly to her. "How are you feeling?" She allowed the tears that she had been pushing back to finally be free.

"I am so lost right now. It feels like I've been sleeping for centuries and now I've awoken into a world I don't recognize," Elena confessed and Alaric pulled her into his welcoming embrace, and held her as she silently cried.

She lay watching silently. She had been put to bed well over an hour ago after she had eaten, yet sleep was elusive.

"You're supposed to be sleeping," Damon spoke out in a whisper from his spot by the large window in his bedroom. He stood with the moonlight bathing him as he held his newborn snugly against his chest with his nose and mouth buried in her hair.

"Yeah, well, I guess I was more hungry than I was sleepy," Bonnie whispered back. "You know, she's only a few hours old and you're already spoiling her. She doesn't have to be held so much."

"Oh, this is just practice. You ain't seen nothing yet," Damon replied with a smirk and a wink, and then he placed a gentle kiss atop Bella's head.

"Well, you bought her this beautiful bassinet," Bonnie pointed to the large mahogany based bassinet which was nestled in the corner closest to the bed.

"No, that was some old dusty thing Stefan brought down from the attic," He corrected with a mildly disgusted look on his face as he turned and regarded the furnishing.

"It doesn't matter it's still beautiful and It would be such a shame for it to go to waste."

"That bassinet has seen plenty of babies, me, Stefan, and our father before us, which now that I think about it, Bella's too good for it. I'll buy her a brand new one tomorrow."

"Fine, then bring her to me and she can sleep in the bed with me. We definitely won't have to worry about me rolling on top of her or her rolling off the side in this bed," Bonnie said making reference to just how huge Damon's monstrosity of a bed was.

"No, especially not with both of us on either side of her," Damon stated as he moved to the bed. Bonnie averted her eyes a bit at his words as he moved around to the side of the bed where she lay.

"Damon, I don't think us sharing a bed is a good idea." He simply arched a brow at her as he settled on the bedside and carefully handed her Bella.

"What … you thought I was just being chivalrous giving you my bedroom? You're here Bon because I want you and Bella close to me," He stated as he watched his sleeping child nuzzle against her mother's bosom obviously searching for a nipple to latch onto. Bonnie obliged her as she slid down the strap of the white satin nightgown she now wore, and unabashedly exposed her breast, which Bella quickly honed in on and began to suckle. Damon stared entranced. He watched with a look of awe and envy on his face. His eyes snapped to Bonnie's face when he heard her slightly wince. "What's wrong?" He asked as he brows bunched up and concern slid across his face.

"She's a biter," She began to explain and went into further details due to the confused look on Damon's face. "It seems that our little one still has a taste for blood, or maybe she just needs it, I don't know, but she's got little fangs which are buried in my breast right now."

"Are you okay?" Damon asked suddenly feeling amazed and helpless by what Bonnie had told him.

"Yeah, it only lasts a few seconds, ah," Bonnie winced again at feeling Bella's fangs retract. "See, looks like she's had her fill with blood already." She announced as she leaned down and kissed the top of her baby's head and slowly began to rock her.

"You're very calm about it," Damon voiced his observations.

"Well, considering how I craved so much blood when she was inside of me I'm not too surprised that she would still need it. She is half vampire after all." Damon nodded her words calmed him a bit. In fact, he had already thought that this may happen but was actually surprised and pleased by how well Bonnie was taking it all in. "If she needs my blood then I'm not going to deny her. I honestly don't think I could ever deny her anything," Bonnie declared as she stared down at Bella lovingly. "But I'm hoping that your blood will be nourishing too because I don't think I can handle it alone, " She added and Damon nodded at her words. "I'm just really going to need you to be here...for her I mean. I can help her with the magical side of who she is, but the vampire side is something you'll have to take the lead on because it seems vampire Bonnie is no more. I'm no longer craving blood, no more bumpies, strength, or any other of the neat vampire perks"

"I'll teach her everything she'll need to know. In no time she'll be a little hell raiser." He said with a smile and a wink, which simply made Bonnie roll her eyes as she smiled back at him. "You don't have to worry Bon, she'll always have me, you both will. We are a family, bonded for eternity, remember?" He proclaimed.

"Yeah, and not so long ago the thought of being immortal and living forever terrified me. Hell, all of this terrified me but now it's..."

"It's comforting to know that she'll always have us with her," Damon finished the thought that Bonnie couldn't seem to put into words. "That we'll always be here to watch over her and protect her," Bonnie nodded with a smile as he spoke her feelings. "It's funny how this little person we've only known about for a couple of weeks can make me feel..." He paused unsure of how to explain what he felt in his heart.

"Such unconditional and overwhelming love," It was Bonnie's turn to voice what they both were thinking and feeling. "I've never been so in love before in my entire life." She proclaimed as fresh tears fell freely and Damon reached over and brushed them away causing Bonnie to look up into his eyes. "I just can't believe that I didn't want her Damon that I tried to-"

"But you didn't Bon, she's here, right here, and she's perfect and absolutely beautiful," Damon assured and comforted her. "It may have all been due to a spell by some whacko to make our lives a living hell, but this time we got lucky and things turned out in our favor for once."

"Yeah, but I don't know if 'she'll' see it that way, Damon," Bonnie stated as she stared off towards the door, and both could feel a somberness fill the bedroom.

"We just won't tell Bella about her supernatural conception," Damon said.

"That's not what I meant," She protested shaking her head slightly. "I'm not referring to Bella, I was talking about Elena." Damon moved his eyes from Bonnie's face over to the Bassinet in the corner. "After everything she's been through, she really needs you right now Damon." The expression on his face hardened a bit as a deep frown crossed his face.

"After everything, she's been through?" He repeated her words. "Sleeping? Yeah, that must have been hard for her. Mind you it's not like Elena has spent the last year and a half trying to find a spell to reverse Kai's sleeping beauty spell, all while trying to keep me from going off the deep end. Elena hasn't been violated by Kai and forced into having my child, or made an immortal who will be eternally bonded to me against her will." Bonnie stared at Damon a bit stunned by the fact that he was so visibly angered.

"Damon," She spoke to him in the voice she always used to calm him. "Why are you acting like somehow this is Elena's fault? She's not to blame for any of this. She is as much a victim as you or I. Why are you so mad?" Bonnie questioned slightly confused. She had actually thought when she saw that Elena had awoken, Damon would be so happy that no one and nothing else would matter as much, and things would be like they were before. Damon would be obsessed with Elena, and Bonnie would become a single mother left on her own to care for their daughter. She had no doubt that Damon would be financially responsible for his child but he would have no room in his life for anyone but Elena. Instead of replying Damon reached over and gently grasped Bella from Bonnie's obliging arms. He then stood and moved to the bassinet and placed the sleeping child inside. Bonnie watched his back as he leaned over the bassinet stroking Bella's soft curls. She knew this was Damon's way of avoiding something he didn't want to face but she wasn't going to leave it alone as she usually would when he acted this way. "You can't ignore this or ignore her she needs you right now Damon, you most of all."

"And what about you?" He tossed out as he turned a bit and gazed at her from over his shoulder.

"I know that she and I will have to talk at some point and we will, but tonight I'm just too exhausted." Damon chuckled as he moved back to the bed. He stood at the bedside hovering over where Bonnie lay against an overabundance of pillows and before she could question his motives, Damon swooped in and softly captured her lips in a sweet kiss. He ended the kiss as quickly as he had begun it even though secretly they both wanted to deepen it.

"You Bonnie Bennett are the most amazing woman I've ever met. You're so selfless that when someone asks about you, your feelings, you make it about someone else's needs." He said with a kind smile as he trailed his fingers across her cheek down to her lush lips. "I love Elena," He then hissed out suddenly around a slight sneer yanking his hand away and fisting them at his sides as he stepped back from the bed. Bonnie flinched back a bit at his Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde behavior while watching him with some apprehension.

"I know you do Damon," She replied with a heavy heart though she honestly didn't know why he acknowledging his love for Elena, as he had always done, stung as it did. "That's why I was suggesting that you go talk to her."

"But I want … this," Damon spoke waving his hands about a bit as Bonnie regarded him with a look of confusion. He stood silently staring down at her for a moment as if expecting her to comprehend his meaning and then explain it all to him. As he stood there she could see the second when his gaze turned from anger to longing, and then to lust, as his piercing blue eyes raked over her prone frame. He took a step back towards the bed, "I want-"

"Damon, please go see Elena." Bonnie quickly spoke out to stop his words and to stop whatever may happen between them if he got any closer. Her words had the effect she had hoped it would. He stalled in his steps, gave a nod, and then turned and left the room making sure to shut the door quietly behind him.

Elena sat on the sofa with Alaric and Caroline on either side of her, while Stefan stood near the hearth watching the flames dance about. Each had spent time catching Elena up on the things she had missed while she slept.

"God, I feel like I'm still sleeping and this is all some dream I'm having," Elena stated as she clutched the glass of water that Caroline had given her but she had yet to drink.

"It's not a dream Elena," Caroline said as she reached over and stroked at her friend's dark tresses. "You're awake and now you can go on to live the life that you always wanted."

"Can I?" Elena questioned as she looked at her friend skeptically. "So much has changed now. Even … Damon," She called out as she looked at the entryway where he stood. It was obvious in his stance that he had not intended to stop as he headed to the exit, but Elena's voice had stilled him, though his eyes remained fixed on the front door. Elena handed Caroline the glass of water and then stood as she regarded him, while the others looked on quietly. "Damon?" She called out to him again and this time he turned and looked at her. She smiled and he couldn't help but smile back for he was genuinely happy to see her standing there so full of life. She took a step forward and he shook his head at her stopping her movements, and then swiftly turned and made a quick exit. Upon hearing the front door shut Elena stumbled back a bit and plopped down on the sofa once more a bit despondent, with Caroline quickly at her side to comfort her. Alaric gave Stefan a look and Stefan nodded as he stepped from the fireplace, and the two men headed out into the night to find Damon.

Neither of them had been completely surprised when their journey ended at one of the sleaziest bars in the roughest part of town. When they made their way into the smoke-filled room they immediately spotted their target seated at the bar with a glass of bourbon in his hand. They trekked to the bar casually pushing through the crowd which was a mix of bikers and college kids.

"Are you kidding me?" Alaric was the first to speak as he and Stefan stood just at Damon's back. His frustration was evident in his voice and demeanor. "You run out on Elena to go get drunk?"

"No," Damon replied calmly as he lifted the brown liquid and stared at it through the glass. "I haven't taken one sip yet," He then shrugged slightly and sat the full glass back atop the bar.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Elena is awake. You remember Elena, you know the woman you have proclaimed for years as being the love of your life? She needs you right now, and you run out on her." Alaric continued his tirade as Stefan looked on with a scowl of disapproval at Alaric's approach. He knew this wasn't the right way to try and reach Damon when he was in his current state. It was obvious to Stefan that his older brother was in turmoil, that he was in a mood of self-loathing, self-pitying, and more importantly that he was scared, no, he was absolutely terrified. A terrified Damon Salvatore was not someone to rile up or piss off. "After everything that she's been through-" The snapping sound of glass being crushed under pressure ended Alaric's words. Damon slammed his bloodied fist onto the bar as he swirled a bit in his seat and glared at Alaric. Stefan quickly stepped in between the two men.

"Alaric, here," He reached into his pocket and pulled out his car keys and then handed them to Alaric. "Take my car and go back to the boarding house. Damon and I will return soon," Alaric relented as he snatched the keys from Stefan's hand. He tossed a disgusted look at Damon, shook his head, and made his exit. Stefan took the stool next to his brother. "Barkeep," He called out to the man that looked way too soft to be working in such a bar. The meek man made his way over not looking a bit bothered by Damon who sat spilling blood on the bar as he pulled shards of glass from his hand. "Could I get two glasses of Bourbon and a towel for my brother here?" The bartender nodded and swiftly poured the requested the drinks and tossed a towel on the bar before moving back to the end of the bar to another patron. "I'm sorry Damon I know this must be hard for you," Stefan said which made Damon toss his head back and laugh out loud.

"Four days," Damon said and Stefan looked over at him with questioning eyes. "It took exactly four days for everything to change."

"Damon, nothing has to change you can still have that perfect life with Elena that you've always talked about," Stefan assured his brother who only arched a brow as he stared down into his glass of bourbon. "Ok, some things have changed you're a father now, but-"

"I'm a father of a baby whose mother is not Elena, but Elena's best friend," Damon added as he finally lifted his glass and took a drink.

"Yeah, due to no fault of your own, or Bonnie's for that matter. Damon, Elena knows what happened and she understands. Sure it'll take some adjusting but you and I both know that she's pretty forgiving when it comes to you, so what's really going on? Why are you so scared to even talk to Elena? She's been through a lot and she needs-"

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" Damon growled out as he slammed his glass onto the bar and then turned to glare at his brother. "You know Elena's not the only one who's been through some shit little brother. Why does it always have to be about what Elena needs or what Elena wants?" He asked and then they sat in silence for a few seconds before Stefan finally replied.

"It doesn't, but 'you've' always made it about Elena; her wants and her needs. Damon, 'you' placed her on that pedestal and put a crown on her head. Why is it such a problem for you now?"

"Why? Because now she's not the most important person in my life, her wants and needs can't come first anymore," Damon answered honestly and Stefan simply nodded his understanding. "I do love Elena, but I can no longer have the life that I envisioned with her. Now, I want something else … something more."

"Are you sure you don't mean 'someone' else?" Stefan asked and he could tell by the way Damon's jaws clenched with tension that he had touched onto something. It hadn't gone unnoticed by Stefan, Caroline, and even Alaric that Damon and Bonnie had grown closer over the months since Kai cast his slumber spell on Elena. Damon had told him on more than one occasion how Bonnie had been what kept him sane for those months that they were trapped in Kai's prison world. They had all witness his grief when he had returned from that prison world without Bonnie. Had seen how determined he had been to find a way to get her out.

"I love Elena," Damon repeated his earlier words and to Stefan, it sounded like he was just reciting words without any conviction behind them. "She's all I've ever wanted, right? I've spent years obsessing over her, stalking her, until I finally wore her down and then stole her from you." He added with a smirk as he reached over and playfully smacked his brother on the back. He then turned back to his glass, lifted it, and downed the remaining liquid. "Now, I've got her back and we can have our lives back," He said although his voice and eyes held no true excitement. "And even better than that, little brother, I've also got the most beautiful baby girl the God has ever blessed upon this planet. She's fucking gorgeous, right?"

"Yes, she is," Stefan said with a nod and he smiled fondly remembering how he thought that very thing when he first saw Bella. "She looks just like Bonnie."

"Yeah, she does," Damon agreed as the smile slipped from his face and his gaze held a far off look. "We're not the most conventional family, but the three of us will make it work. Come on, let's go home." Damon said as he stood and tossed a couple of bills on the bar. As Stefan followed him out he couldn't help but wonder which three Damon was referring to.

At the Salvatore Boarding House:

"Bonnie?" Elena called out in a whisper as she stuck her head around the door to Damon's bedroom, the room that she had once shared with him. Her eyes immediately landed on Bonnie's sleeping form which looked so small in the large bed. Elena had to quickly swallow back the jealous pang she felt at seeing another woman in 'her' bed. She had to remind herself that this was Bonnie, her best friend, and not some whore trying to steal Damon from her. Elena decided not to awaken Bonnie who looked so tired, but as she was about the shut the door the small cooing noise that came from the bassinet by the bed stopped her. She quietly walked over to the bassinet and peeked inside and a smile quickly graced her face when electric blue eyes stared up at her. Elena noted that the baby's eyes seemed to be very focused and in tuned with their surroundings. "Hello Bella," Elena greeted and her smile spread further as she reached down and carefully scooped the precious cargo up into her arms. "Hello, beautiful angel," Elena sing-song as she gently rocked Bella in her arms. Bonnie had Elena locked into her peripheral vision from the second she had stepped foot into the room. She silently watched Elena's handling of her daughter curious to see how she would behave when she didn't know she was being watched. Bonnie was happy and also relieved to see her friend being so caring, and she felt slight shame that she had ever doubted she would be. Elena was her best friend after all and she knew that Elena loved her, and so she should have known that she would also love her daughter no matter whom the father was. "I'm your auntie Elena and I'm your mommy's best friend and your daddy's … Well, I'll have to get back to you on that one," She said and Bonnie's brow bunched a bit at her words. Bonnie's mind began to reel with thoughts of what had happened between Damon and Elena during their 'talk'. "Welcome to the world little one. I know that right now it probably seems very big and scary to you but don't you worry, you've already got so many people who love you and who will always protect you."

"What are you doing?" Damon's voice filled the room and both Elena and Bonnie jumped a bit in surprise. Bonnie quickly began to calm herself and slow her breathing to cover the fact that she wasn't asleep. She had mastered the trick while she and Damon had been stuck in Kai's prison world, where she had been able to easily fool Damon into believing she was sleep so he would leave her alone.

"Damon, you're back," Elena spoke out with a tiny smile and her stomach fluttered in excitement at seeing him. She was so elated that she hadn't noticed his look of irritation as he stalked to where she stood and grasped his daughter.

"You shouldn't be in here," He spoke in a harsh tone that Elena did pick up on and she wrapped her arms around herself defensively as she watched him kiss Bella's head and then he placed her back in the bassinet.

"Sorry, I just came up to see Bonnie but she was asleep."

"Yeah, well, she just had a baby," Damon stated as he let his eyes glance to where Bonnie appeared to be resting peacefully.

"I know, she's probably exhausted and that's why I decided not to wake her, but then I noticed Bella was awake and I couldn't resist holding her. She is truly beautiful Damon."

"Thank you," He said as he smiled down at Bella who had a firm hold on his finger as she looked up directly at him. "And you young lady should be sleeping now too."

"She's probably hungry again," Bonnie spoke out her maternal instinct getting the better of her as she turned over and sat up on the bed.

"Sorry, Bonnie, we didn't mean to wake you," Elena said.

"It's all right, I really haven't been able to sleep very soundly anyway," Bonnie stated and noticed the concerned looks on both Elena and Damon's faces, and so she explained to try to set their minds at ease. "When she's fussy I jump up to get her, and when she's quiet I get nervous and I jump up to check on her." She said as she held out her arms and Damon picked up Bella, carried her over to Bonnie, and settled her into Bonnie's welcoming arms. He then quickly turned away as she began to pull down the strap of her nightgown, not wanting to let the tempting sight of her exposed breasts get the better of him.

"We'll just go downstairs," Damon said as he ushered Elena to the door. "If you need anything give a holler one of the supernatural beings in this house is bound to hear you."

"Ok," Bonnie replied with a smile and a nod as she cradled Bella to her breast. She noticed the forlorn look that briefly crossed Damon's face just before he exited the room closing the door behind him. She sat silently while nursing her child while she contemplated what his look might be foreshadowing.

Both had remained silent as they walked arm in arm through the halls, descended the stairs, and then entered the study. Damon had mumbled something about the study giving them the most privacy, but Elena knew that it was where he housed the good booze and figured that was the true reason he had picked it. The second they crossed the threshold Damon made his way to the bar, poured himself a stiff drink, and downed it in one gulp before pouring himself another.

"I've missed you, Damon," Elena said softly and Damon locked his eyes on hers. "I know that time supposedly stopped for me, but not really. It's kind of hard to explain but I just 'feel' like I haven't seen you or the others in such a long time."

"I've missed you too," He responded genuinely. "There were times when I thought I would lose my mind from missing you so much," He added and she smiled at hearing this. "The only reason I didn't was..." He faltered in his words as he let his eyes drift from hers and land onto the flames blazing in the fireplace. "It was because of Bonnie. She wouldn't let me lose myself in the grief of missing you. It's because of her I didn't just turn off my humanity and become a Ripper."

"I'm glad that you had her, that you both had each other. I know how close you two have gotten since you were trapped in that prison world." Damon nodded at her words.

"It's more than that now," He said and Elena's face frowned up in confusion as her heart rate increased.

"What do you mean?" She questioned as her mind raced with a carnal thought of Bonnie and Damon together. "I know that you two … But it was a spell and it was just the one time, right?"

"Yes, but that's not what I mean," Damon replied. "I don't know if it was all explained to you or not but Bonnie is immortal now."

"Yeah, it's all a part of Kai's twisted spell," Elena said as she nodded her head, her face still held a perplexed look as she wondered what Damon was getting at. "Bonnie said that she thought my blood held the key since it has the cure within it, but when she took blood from me it didn't work. She said that she was sure that somehow Kai found a way to make her resistant to the cure."

"Elena, now that Bonnie is immortal and we have Bella, she and I will be bonded forever."

"Damon what are you saying? Are you saying that you're leaving me, that you want to be with Bonnie?" She asked as her eyes suddenly gleamed with her unshed tears, while her breathing became labored, and her small frame shook a bit with her fears. To Damon, Elena looked utterly devastated, and it was almost unbearable for him knowing that he was causing her such pain. He quelled all his newfound wants and desires and decided to focus on Elena. He felt that after everything he had already put her through over the years that he owed her and that she deserved happiness. He honestly believed that he had to give her all the things he had ever promised her, even if deep down he had come to realize he didn't necessarily want those same things any longer.

"I just need you to understand that we, Bella, Bonnie, and me, we're a family now. Bonnie and I are bonded by Bella and we're always going to be in each other's lives. I hope that you'll be ok with that," He stated and could see the relief wash over Elena.

"Of course, Bella is your daughter and I would expect, no I would insist that you always be there for her, and to be right there helping Bonnie raise her. I would never come in between that or give you some ultimatum about it." Elena spoke from her heart. "Bella is practically my niece and I plan to love her and spoil her rotten." She said with a smile. "God, is that why you've been acting so distant? You thought I wouldn't want you because you have a daughter with Bonnie? Damon, I love you and I love Bonnie too. I know that what has happened isn't either of your faults, so I could never hold it against you." She said as she moved to him and wrapped her arms around his middle. Damon enveloped her in his arms and held her tightly against his chest as he closed his eyes and breathed in her essence. He had truly missed her and until that very moment, he hadn't realized how much. He chuckled when he heard Elena attempting to cover a yawn.

"Seriously," He laughed as he pulled back a bit from their embrace and looked down at her. "You're still sleepy?" Elena giggled a bit at his words as she nodded her head a bit.

"Mostly tired, who knew that lying still in a coffin for nearly 20 months could be so tiring? Alaric offered to let me stay with him, but I'd really like to stay with you if that's ok?"

"Of course, we have a lot of spare bedrooms in this house, and you can pick anyone you want," Damon said with a teasing smile. "I'm going to go up and check on Bonnie and Bella, give Bella a kiss goodnight, and then I'll find you, ok?"

"OK," Elena said with a nod as she beamed with happiness. "I think Alaric and the others are in the kitchen, I'm just going to go say goodnight." She then stood up on her tiptoes and pulled Damon into a kiss. It didn't take long before the kiss deepened as a sense of familiarity washed over them. It had only been Elena's need to breathe that had ended the moment, as she stepped away and slowly moved to the exit. Damon watched her go as his body hummed with anticipation and longed for more. He exited the study and bounded up the stairs.

With each step, his mind berated him for kissing Elena and for wanting her as he did. He felt so conflicted. When he entered his bedroom and rested his eye upon Bonnie he instantly became filled with guilt and though he knew he had no reason to feel that way, the guilt would not lessen. He moved to the bed and watched over Bonnie as she slept. She looked so bewitching and so beautiful that he felt compelled to touch her. The second his fingers glided across her clavicle bone her eyes snapped open and locked onto his.

"Damon?" She called out to him in a hushed tone, her voice still heavy with sleep. "What's-" He pounced upon her with his mouth and his body; kissing her and touching her, licking her and squeezing her, nibbling and pinching at her flesh. He would have taken her in that moment had she not regained her wits and her voice. "No, Damon, no," She gasped out through her panting as she placed her hands against his chest to stave off any further advances. "Elena's awake now … and you love her, remember?" Bonnie said as her voice hitched with regret, and her heart ached for whatever this feeling was that Damon evoked in her, while her eyes watered with tears that reflected her desires but she kept them locked away.

"Yes," Damon said not bothering to deny it as he leaned in and rested his forehead against hers. "But I love you too Bonnie Bennett," He declared and Bonnie released her tears and they happily rolled down her cheeks as she closed her eyes and allowed her entire body to fall back against the pillows in abandon. Damon seized the moment and wrapped her in his arms and placed kisses across her face and neck. "And I want you so fucking badly." He proclaimed as he sucked and nibbled at her neck with blunt teeth.

"Oh God," She cried out and from her tone, it was unclear if she was asking for God's help to be free of this Damon madness, or for his help to entrap Damon within her forever. Again it was the thought of her friend that was the deciding factor. "We have to think of Elena..." She whispered into his ear as he nuzzled her neck. Damon stopped moving but still held her in a lover's embrace as he rested his head against Bonnie's chest and listened to her heart beating.

"50 to 60 years," Damon said as Bonnie lay beneath him listening in confusion while she absentmindedly stroked his hair. "You and I have an eternity, but she only has 50 to 60 years, maybe. I can give her that and I will give her that if..." He then lifted up and seated himself on the bed next to her. "Just 50 to 60 years, Bonnie. Can you wait that long … would you wait that long for me?" He asked as he stared at her awaiting her response. Bonnie lay speechless staring back at him dumbfounded as déjà vu breezed through her.

The next morning:

"Oh my God! Damon Salvatore is an ass!"

"Caroline," Bonnie hissed out as she clutched her sleeping daughter closer as let her eyes shoot to the entrance way to the kitchen.

"What? Bella's sleeping and she wouldn't understand what I was saying anyways." Caroline defended as she and Bonnie sat on the window seat of the huge bay window that was in the kitchen.

"I'm not worried about Bella hearing you," Bonnie said.

"Oh, who are you worried about hearing me, Damon? I hope he hears because he's an ass!" Caroline barked out not caring to hide her disgust.

"No, mostly I don't want Elena to hear."

"Why not? She should know just how much of an ass Damon is. I cannot believe he actually asked you that. That he expects you to put your life and your happiness on hold for 60 years so that once again Elena can come first. Don't get me wrong I love Elena, you know I do," Caroline defended and Bonnie nodded in agreement for she did know. "But damn it why is it always 'Elena, Elena, Elena'?" She sang out in a whiny voice and Bonnie couldn't stop her giggles.

"C'mon Care keep it down, please." Bonnie chastised and Caroline lowered her voice because she didn't want Elena to overhear and be hurt by her words.

"Uhggg, it just makes me so mad. You, Bonnie Bennett, are fucking amazing and you do not have to play second fiddle to anyone, no one, do you hear me?" Bonnie nodded as she looked at her friend and biggest advocate. "You did tell Damon where he can shove his idea, right?"

"Uhm," Bonnie spoke out again as she wrinkled up her nose and nervously twisted her lips.

"Uhm ... What?" Caroline question as she looked back with wide eyes. "Wait, Bonnie, you did tell him no, right?" Caroline asked and Bonnie averted her eyes to the beautiful gardens that could be seen through the large bay window. "Bon, seriously, you said yes?"

"No," Bonnie quickly replied in a hushed tone as she eyed the kitchen entrance way briefly before looking back at her friend. "I didn't say yes … I didn't say anything."

"That's practically a yes."

"I couldn't say anything because before I could Damon heard Elena coming to look for him, so that kind of ended things."

"Ok, so you didn't get the chance to tell him 'Hell No', would you like me to do it because I would be glad to?" Caroline offered as she let her eyes roll a bit at that thought of the pleasure it would give her to tell Damon off.

"Thanks but no. I was actually planning to avoid the conversation altogether and just leave," Bonnie stated but before Caroline could speak her next words Elena and Damon entered the kitchen.

"Who's leaving?" Elena asked as they crossed the threshold.

"Please say it's you, Vampire Barbie," Damon said with his signature smirk as he trekked straight to Bonnie and eased his daughter from her arms into his embrace. The tender smile his face held at holding his baby instantly disappeared when he noticed the death glare Caroline was giving him.

"Oh, you do not want to start with me Mr. Salvatore, you pompous ass, not today," Caroline nearly growled out causing them all to give her a look. Elena's look was one of slight amusement at seeing that at least Damon and Caroline's relationship hadn't changed. Whereas Bonnie and Damon both held a look of fear; Bonnie because she feared Elena discovering what they had discussed, Damon because he realized that Caroline knew about his proposition and he knew she might convince Bonnie to say no.

"It's me," Bonnie spoke out quickly to slice the tension that was building but when Damon's face soured and he turned an icy glare onto her she wished she had just kept her mouth closed. "I was thinking … uh … maybe I should go-"

"No," Damon cut her off in a dismissive manner. He then kissed Bella's head and moved them to the counter where he then stood resting his weight while humming a melodic tune softly into Bella's soft curls. He kept his hard eyes onto Bonnie who seemed to wither a little under his gaze.

"Excuse me?" It was Caroline's voice that spoke in outrage. "Just who in the hell do you think you are?"

"Bella's father," He replied calmly as he slowly rolled his eyes from Bonnie's to Caroline. "She isn't even a day old yet, it's a bit soon to be moving her from house to house. There are a lot of nasty germs out there that could make her sick. Besides, I'd like to keep my daughter here with me a little while longer."

"Oh, really?" Caroline spoke as she stood from the seat, took a couple of steps towards Damon as she folded her arms across her chest. "You just want to keep 'Bella' close to you, huh?" She questioned his motives as she arched her brow. Damon didn't reply. He continued kissing his baby's head as he cast Caroline as threatening look.

"Why do you sound like you doubt him, Caroline? Why is it shocking that he just wants to spend more time with his daughter?" Elena finally spoke out as she moved to stand beside Damon. "Damon is right Bon," She then turned to Bonnie, who sat quietly. "About the germs I mean. Bella's little system couldn't take being exposed to someone who is sick," She then reached over and grasped Bella's tiny little fist. "We wouldn't want our little angel getting sick, now would we?" The sight of Damon and Elena huddled together over Bella and looking like a cozy little family made something within Bonnie roar in anger, and it made her hop from her seat.

"Give me 'my' daughter … Please," She spoke out in a soft but demanding tone, which only seemed to surprise Elena, who looked at her friend curiously. Damon moved back to her without hesitation and settled Bella back into her arms. "This isn't going to work, Damon, I just can't do it. I know what you want and, God help me," She whispered and closed her eyes a moment and a single tear rolled from her eyes. "I want it too," She continued to whisper hoping to keep her words from reaching Elena's ears, who still stood by the counter watching them in confusion. "But I can't wait for it, I won't wait. I deserve better than some crumbs you might toss my way over the next 60 years. The thought of sitting around watching and waiting," She shook her head as she closed her eyes allowing more tears to escape. "It would hurt, it does hurt, I hurt, Damon," She then sniffed, took a deep breath, and wiped at her eyes. She nestled their child closer against her bosom and then walked to the exit, where she stopped and turned back to look into Damon's eyes. "So, the answer to your question is 'no'," In that moment he looked totally defeated with glassy eyes that made him look as if he wanted to cry but he seemed to swallow it all down as quickly as it had surfaced. She waited a moment for him to reply. Somewhere deep down she had held a hope that he would speak up and choose her, but as he stood there watching her longingly as if expecting her to apologize and say she changed her mind, she knew that he wouldn't and so she left the room.

"OK, will somebody tell me what that was about?" Elena asked as she looked from Damon's back over to where Caroline stood next to her.

"That was Bonnie finally looking out for Bonnie," Caroline replied as she reached over hugged Elena, kissed her temple, and then made her way to the exit. "And it's about fucking time." She added as she stopped at the threshold and turned back to look at Damon. "You're an ass for asking that of her. Hasn't she sacrificed herself enough for all of us?" She hissed out at Damon and then walked out.

"Damon, what did Bonnie say to you?" Elena asked as she stared at his back once more. "And what was Caroline talking about?" When he continued to stand there stoically Elena grasped his arm and tugged on him until he turned around and faced her. "Damon, tell me what's going on."

"I thought I could have it all," He finally said tossing her his signature crooked smirk. "But it seems that I can't and Bonnie's leaving."

"I'll go talk to her maybe I can convince her to stay a little longer," Elena offered as she reached up and cupped his cheek. "And then you two can work out some kind of visitation schedule for Bella," Damon grasped her hand and removed it from his cheek as he frowned down at her.

"I don't want visitation," Damon spat out his face holding his contempt of the idea. "I don't want her to leave me," His words and the conviction he put behind them made a chill go through Elena and she clamped her hands together in front of her body and squeezed them tightly to try to stop herself from shaking. However, she couldn't stop her lips from quivering as she spoke.

"You're not talking about Bella are you?" She asked and Damon let his head hang a bit lower as he averted his eyes from hers. Elena turned her head to the large window and looked outside. She felt as if she had been kicked in the stomach as she huffed out some air and leaned forward a bit and clutched at her side. Her eyes darted about the scenery outside while her mind reeled with many questions and some confusion. "Something more happened between you and Bonnie while I was gone," Elena said as she nodded her head. When Damon looked over at her he could tell that what she had said had been said mostly to herself, and she wasn't expecting him to answer but he felt he needed to explain anyway.

"It started before then."

"Really?" Elena barked out as she turned her tear stained face back onto Damon's "So, how long exactly have you and my best friend been screwing around behind my back?"

"We've never screwed, Elena," He declared and she crossed her arms and arched her brows as she threw him a disbelieving look. "Ok, except for the one magically induce time, which you knew about, but that was it. You should know that Bonnie wouldn't purposely do that to you," He stated with a scowl on his face, and Elena looked a little apologetic for her accusation.

"Well, that must have been some mojo Kai cooked up to make you suddenly fall in love with Bonnie."

"Believe me it wasn't sudden and that's not why I fell in love with her. It had nothing to do with sex," Damon nearly yelled, his anger now getting the better of him. "I've been sexually attracted to Bonnie since the moment I laid eyes on her, and I can say the same thing about Caroline too. Sorry Elena, but you've got some majorly hot friends."

"So, you love her, you love Bonnie?" Elena spoke in a very meek tone as her face grew paler by the second. "And that's why you wouldn't make love to me last night?"

"Yes," Damon replied without hesitation seeing no point in denying it further.

"So, where does that leave me, Damon, where does it leave us?"

"I still love you, Elena-"

"Wait, is that what you meant when you said you thought you could have it all?" She asked as her anger now grew. "What, you thought you could have me as your main squeeze and also have sex with Bonnie on the side, or maybe it would have been the other way around?"

"No, I wouldn't do that to either of you."

"No, really? Ok, so, what was the plan then, Damon? What, you'd just be with me until I keeled over and then you'd go hook up with Bonnie since she's immortal and all?" His silence and the way he could no longer look her in the eyes told her that her words had been accurate. "Oh my God!" She shouted as she cupped her hand over her mouth and laughed a little even though she felt horrified instead of humored. Her laughter left the room and in its place came the sound of a loud smack as Elena's hand came across Damon's face. "You son-of-a-bitch, Caroline was right, you are a pompous ass!" She spat at him as she stalked from the kitchen and nearly mowed over Stefan and Caroline who had just come in to see what all the yelling was about.

"Elena, what happened?" Caroline called out as she turned and chased after Elena as she hurried from the house.

"Ok, what have you done now Damon?" Stefan asked as he frowned at his brother.

"It seems I've lost it all, little brother," He said as he looked at his brother with a deflated, sad smirk. "I've lost it all."

"And you actually thought that idea would work?" Stefan asked baffled and also slightly amused by the plan that his older brother had concocted.

"I guess I wasn't thinking at the time," Damon replied as he sat with his elbows resting on the kitchen island with his face buried in both hands.

"Obviously,"

"That's right little brother," Damon spoke as he raised his head, swirled on the stool, and gave Stefan, who was seated beside him, his full attention. "Lay it all on me. Tell me how much of an ass I am."

"I can't," Stefan said with a slight pout. "I've already met my 'tell Damon he's an ass' quota for the month," He joked with a small smile and Damon couldn't stop the smile that spread on his own face. "Besides, you already know that you're an ass so why are you letting this time get to you so much? You've done far worse and Elena has always forgiven you."

"But not Bonnie, my little witch is not so forgiving," Damon said as the sense of doom he had been feeling since Bonnie told him 'no' crept upon him once more.

Just five minutes into packing and already Bonnie was becoming flustered as she looked at all of the baby things that were on the bed and scattered around the room.

Upstairs:

"God, I cannot believe I let Care convince me to get you all of this stuff, babygirl," She spoke aloud into the room where she thought she only had her daughter as company, but when Caroline's voice cut in Bonnie jumped, placed a hand on her chest, and turn towards the door in surprise.

"We didn't buy all of this stuff," She said with her head stuck around the door and her body hidden on the other side. "I've seen Damon bringing in a lot of this, so it's his fault, not mine. And while we're on the subject of blaming Damon for things..." She then pushed the door open further and walked in while tugging Elena behind her. "I think you two need to talk."

"Elena," Bonnie called out to her best friend softly. "I'm so-"

"Don't," Elena cut her off as she snapped her red bloodshot eyes up to meet Bonnie's who in turn bowed her head a bit and locked her eyes down to the floor. "Don't you dare say you're sorry," She continued. "Because 'you' didn't do anything wrong," These words made Bonnie lift her eyes and look at Elena curiously. She then shot her eyes to Caroline who stood next to Elena with her arms across her chest while she beamed like the cat that caught the canary.

"Yes I did, I fell in love with Damon," Bonnie whispered out as if she were genuinely afraid to say it too loudly.

"I agree, that is 'so' wrong," Caroline chimed in with a disgusted look on her face. "And you're both guilty of it. God, where did I go wrong when I was educating you two about boys?" She said as she looked off as if she were lost in memories of the time.

"Caroline," Elena said as she and Bonnie regarded their friend with matching humorous smirks.

"What? I honestly don't know how either one of you could actually love him without being compelled to," She said and a gurgle from the nearby bassinet instantly gained all of her attention. "Oh, there's my goddaughter," She cooed as she walked into the far corner of the room and gave Bonnie and Elena some privacy.

"I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry," Bonnie started and Elena stepped closer to her and grasped her hand. "I still can't believe I even have those kinds of feelings for Damon."

Back downstairs:

"I still can't believe that you've finally admitted your feelings for Bonnie," Stefan said and Damon bunched his brows as he turned to regard his brother again. Stefan caught the look on Damon's face. "What? We all knew how you felt, how you 'both' felt about each other, but none of us thought that either of you would ever actually admit to it let alone act on it. Bonnie never would because she's convinced herself that you and Elena are destined to be, which is your fault with all of your, "Elena's my destiny and if it comes down to your life or Elena's I'm always going to choose Elena's. The rest of you can go to hell!" Stefan mimicked and Damon could only close his eyes and inwardly groan at Stefan's true imitation of him. "Also, Bonnie's so loyal and self-sacrificing. She'd bury her feelings for you and carry on like she hated you if she thought it would spare Elena pain," Damon simply nodded at this. "Now, you, on the other hand, you're just stubborn and self-absorbed and selfish," Again Damon only nodded at these very true descriptions. "I was sure you'd never accept your feelings for Bonnie because if you did you'd have to come to the realization that 'maybe' Elena isn't the love of your life as you've always proclaimed, and I knew that would be difficult for you because of Katherine."

"What?" Damon spat out in surprise and mild disgust. "What does that wicked bitch have to do with any of this?"

"Uh … Everything," Stefan said with a chuckle. "Damon you loved … No, you obsessed over Katherine for nearly a century and a half. Then you learned that she never really loved you-"

"No, she never did. It was always you little brother," Damon cut in and the sting of it all was still evident in his voice.

"Right," Stefan replied feeling a little bit guilty. "Then, after you decided to move on from Katherine who did you move on to? One of Katherine's descendants, who also happened to be her doppelgänger, 'and' who I was dating at the time. You honestly think that was all just a coincidence?"

"I loved Elena and it had nothing to do with Katherine or you," Damon defended.

"Really? So, the thought of finally getting some version of Katherine, the woman you spent a century and a half pining for... did I mention that already?" He asked playfully and Damon shot daggers at him which made him chuckle as he continued. "You never thought of Katherine once during the time you pursued Elena, trying to get her to fall out of love with me and fall in love with you? The fantasy of having 'Katherine' choose you over me, the guy you felt stole her from you, it never once crossed your mind, Damon? "

"I loved Elena," Damon said again although this time the tone was less defiant and more defeated.

"I know you did Damon... eventually. So, when I saw that you truly started to love 'Elena' and not what she represented to you and that Elena truly loved you too, I never fought you about any of it or mentioned Katherine. But now, you must know that your interest in Elena, in the beginning, was never really about Elena. What I'm curious about is when did 'you' start to realize it?"

"May 10th, 1994," Damon answered surprising Stefan with his response.

"Well, that's specific. Wait, you didn't even know Elena back then and she was like one or two years old," Stefan stated.

"I'm talking about when Bonnie and I were trapped in Kai's prison world, where we lived May 10th, 1994 over and over again for months," Damon said and Stefan nodded his understanding. "At first I thought I was in hell being forced to relive probably the worst day in my life, as you well know," Again Stefan nodded. "That topped with the thought that I would never see Elena again nearly did me in, but..."

"But you had Bonnie," Stefan finished for him and it was Damon's turn to nod as a smile played on his lips.

"There were some days where she would literally pick me up and make me carry on. Even when I purposely did things to piss her off and even hurt her," He added shamefaced. "She wouldn't let me just give up. She kept promising me that she'd find a way to get me back to Elena. Not 'get us home', but get me back to Elena. After about a month we kind of fell into a routine; I'd make breakfast, she'd make dinner and it was nice. Every day that I was there with Bonnie-"

"You didn't miss being here with Elena so much," Stefan finished.

"Yeah, but even then I think I was still in denial. It actually wasn't until Kai finally showed his evil mug that I started to notice it."

"Why then, was he a threat to Bonnie even then?" Stefan asked becoming slightly angered as he remembered the story Bonnie had told him about when she was alone in the prison world with Kai, how he had tortured and tormented her.

"No, he actually liked her and he would just flirt with her a lot. At first, I found it disgusting the way he carried on and the way she'd giggle a little and tuck her hair behind her ears, but it quickly turned to anger whenever he was near her, and then blinding rage whenever he'd touch her."

"So, you were jealous."

"Is that what it was?" Damon asked as he looked to his brother honestly seeking his knowledge and wisdom. "Because I had never felt that before, not 'that' kind of simmering rage. Not with Katherine and not with Elena."

Back Upstairs:

"Damon..." Elena spoke out his name dreamily as she smiled slightly and shook her head a bit while trying to find the words. "There's just something about him, he's-"

"Like a fever, you can't shake," Bonnie said as she chuckled to herself remembering Damon teasing her with those very words once upon a time.

"Yeah," Elena agreed as she smiled and nodded.

"Oh, please," Caroline chimed in from her spot at the foot of the bed where she sat rocking a sleeping Bella. "He's more like a 'disease' you can't shake, like Syphilis or herpes," She said and both Bonnie and Elena burst into a fit of laughter which woke Bella and caused her to cry out briefly as her face twisted up in a frown that morphed into the cutest pout.

"Ahwww, I don't think she likes us bad mouthing her daddy," Elena announced.

"What are we going to do?" Bonnie spoke out bringing the focus back onto their Damon situation.

"You, Bonnie Bennett, are going to be happy for once in your life," Elena said and Bonnie looked at her in confusion. "Damon loves you and more importantly he's 'in love with you'," She explained and both Bonnie and Caroline watched with their mouths slightly agape as they listened. "Yeah, I know that Damon loves me too, but he's not in love with me and honestly I don't think he ever was."

"Elena that's not true," Bonnie interjected as she shook her head.

"Yes, it is. At first, Damon was in love with the 'idea' of what I represented … who I represented," Elena further explained and her words had Caroline nodding her head even when Bonnie didn't fully understand what she meant.

"Katherine," Caroline said and Elena nodded.

"Yep, I reminded him of his long lost love, Katherine. Then, Damon fell in love with getting 'revenge'."

"If he stole you from Stefan then that would be payback because he blamed Stefan for stealing Katherine from him," Bonnie replied as things started to click in her mind with what Elena was saying. Elena nodded at her words.

"And finally, Damon fell in love with his humanity again. He started doing good deeds because he thought he could win me over that way and it worked. Eventually, he did good simply because he wanted to, not because of me, but he couldn't see that it was all him and not me. So, he held on tighter to me because he deemed me as his connection to his humanity."

"When did you have this epiphany?" Bonnie questioned because she was curious to know how long Elena had been 'pretending' with Damon.

"After I had Alaric to compel me to forget that I loved Damon, and you were trapped in Kai's prison world. I got to really see Damon for who and what he is, all from an 'outside looking in' perspective. All the evil things he had done those things that made me hate him before, they were all fresh in my mind. Yet, I also got to see the good side of him, and it wasn't some farce or something he did to impress me. In fact, he even told me that his actions had absolutely nothing to do with me. Everything that he did during that time, all that he cared about was you. Even when he was trying to woo me back and make me remember how we loved each other, somehow the conversation always ended up back with you. How you kept him sane in that prison world. How you always listened to him. How you sacrificed yourself to get him out. When you were trapped you trapped there with Kai alone, Bon, you should have seen him. He was so determined to get you out of there."

"Yeah, he became pretty obsessed with it," Caroline agreed.

"And it made me fall for him all over again, even though it was obvious to me that he was in love with you," She said with sad eyes and a sad smile.

"Elena, I-" Bonnie began to speak but Elena silenced her with a shake of her head.

"No, not this time, this time Bonnie you get to have the happily ever after."

"But what if-" Bonnie's words were cut short again but this time by Caroline.

"I cannot believe that I'm actually about to say this, but … Do you love Damon, Bonnie?" Caroline asked looking directly at Bonnie, who stood silently looking back and forth between her friends as she thought about it.

"Do you love Bonnie, Damon?" Stefan asked as he stared hard at his older brother looking as if he could gauge whether Damon would tell a lie or the truth. Damon sat up a little straighter and his scowl deepened as he contemplated the question.

"I'm talking head over heels, a 'Gone with the Wind' type of love," Caroline went on.

"That desperate, crazy, and sometimes pathetic kind of love," Stefan added.

"Yes," Both Bonnie and Damon affirmed in unison. Both of them smiled while their eyes held a far off gaze as they both pictured the other in their mind.

"Then go get your man girl," Caroline said snapping Bonnie from her haze. Bonnie tightened her grip on Elena's hand as she looked at her warily. Elena looked back at her with tear filled eyes and a quivering smile. Then, she gave a nod of approval. Bonnie quickly pulled Elena into an embrace.

"Thank you, Elena," She whispered and the smile on Elena's face widened as her tears fell.

"After all the times you've saved me and allowed me to have happiness you deserve this, and this doesn't even come close to making us even. I still owe you so much," Elena whispered back and then she pulled from their embrace and wiped away her tears. "Now, go before Damon goes off and does something stupid."

"If he hasn't already," Caroline mumbled but was still loud enough that her friends heard her. "Well go on, we'll look after Bella," She said and Bonnie gave a quick nod of her head and hurried to the door.

"Well, if you love Bonnie that much go upstairs and tell her how you feel, tell her that you choose her and hurry before she leaves and you lose her forever," Stefan advised. Damon reached over and gripped his brother's shoulder with his hand, shoved him slightly, and gave him a smile of thanks. Stefan smiled back, gave a nod, and then watched as his brother flashed from the room.

Epilogue coming soon!

[tortuga-aak]

I trained with the Radio City Rockettes, an iconic part of the New York City holiday season — and it was much, much harder than it sounds

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

As a a child, I dreamed of dancing alongside the Radio City Rockettes. 

I was finally given the chance at 28 years old. 

During the class, four veteran Rockettes taught me part of their routine. 

I gained a whole new respect for these women and realized what they meant to me all those years ago. 

For as long as I can remember, I've been a dancer. My mom enrolled me in ballet class when I was 5, thinking that hour of movement would keep me still the rest of the day. But her plan backfired: those classes only made me move more. At school, I'd tap my feet beneath the desk, keeping perfect time with the melody in my head. At home, I'd lock myself in the playroom and turn on music, performing for a large audience of unresponsive stuffed animals and Barbie dolls. 

This passion for dance only grew as I explored other genres and was exposed to professional dance companies. But unlike my peers, I had no desire to be a Prima ballerina or even a Broadway baby. I wanted to be a Radio City Rockette. 

Matthew Peyton/Getty Images

The first time I saw the group perform in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, I thought it was my destiny to dance with them. Their energy and happiness were contagious to me, an already antsy and cheerful child. Their sequins-covered costumes were enviable to a girl who walked around in discarded dance costumes. Not to mention my last name — Rocketto — is a mere one letter off from Rockette. It was basically my birth right. 

Leah Rocketto / INSIDER

Unfortunately, there's this little thing called reality that tends to crush people's dreams. As the resident shorty, I knew I'd never meet the Rockette height requirement of 5' 6". I also had other passions, like writing and running, that took time away from dance as I got older. I quickly realized that being a Rocketto was the closest I would get to being a Rockette. 

That is until I received an e-mail from the Rockettes' PR department asking if I'd like the chance to rehearse with and interview several members of the Rockettes. It's as if this woman was playing the role of Santa, and making my childhood wishes come true. Needless to say, I said yes.

All Rockette rehearsals start with a warm up — but it feels like a workout. 

I arrived at the Rockette rehearsal space with nerves and excitement blending in my belly. Yes, I knew this was supposed to be a fun experience. But as a perfectionist and performer, I wanted to do it right. I wanted to blow these women away to the point that they'd adjust their height requirement just so I could join. 

I was immediately greeted by a group of tall, bubbly women, each of whom was illuminated by their bright white smile. After exchanging hellos and names, we jumped into the warm-up. 

I sauntered to the middle of the floor and planted my feet in preparation for the bending and stretching that I assumed would follow. That was my first embarrassing moment of the day. 

"We're actually going to start here," Hanna Sides, the current Rockette dance captain, said as she pointed to the wall. She explained that we'd be doing dynamic movements across the room. 

"We have a series of dynamic stretches that we use to prepare our body for the athletic choreography that we do in the show," Sides, who is a fitness instructor in the off-season, explained to me. These stretches include lunges, toe-touch kicks, and "the scoop" — a move where you bend one leg, straighten the other at an angle, and scoop your body down and up. 

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

That's when I encountered my second embarrassing moment: struggling with the warm-up. With each step, a tightness crawled up my leg and left my mouth in the form of a high-pitched squeal of pain. As we moved back and forth across the gym, beads of sweat fell down my forehead. I always considered myself in shape, always striving to get the recommended amount of exercise every week. And maybe I was in shape, but not enough to keep up with these all-star athletes. Yes, athletes. 

The Rockette's rehearsal schedule is comparable to professional athletes. 

As we settled down for some static warm-ups, we started talking about life among the Rockettes. I quickly learned just how much work goes into creating a 90-minute performance. 

"We rehearse seven hours a day, six days a week for six weeks leading up to the show," Rockette Danielle Betscher told me. During this time, the women learn and perfect their routines while forming what they call a "sisterhood of fitness."

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

It turns out, most of the Rockettes are fitness instructors or personal trainers in the off-season: something the whole company benefits from. Betscher explained that, in addition to their studio rehearsals, the women attend each other's yoga or barre classes, not only to build their stamina, but to bond. 

"For us to do what we do on stage, it takes so much teamwork that we have to get along," Sides said. These type of outings help. 

Of course, it also takes a certain level of athleticism, something audience members may not realize. When asked what the biggest misconception of the Rockettes is, the girls almost answer in unison. 

"That it's easy," Rockett Lauren Gibbs said. "I just think we make it look so effortless, and it takes so much training, to make the look effortless." 

The routines are made of simple, but fast, movements. 

Finally, our bodies warmed, Sides told me it was time to dance. We'd be learning the choreography to "Let Christmas Shine," one of their more popular numbers. Despite my hatred for hearing Christmas music before Thanksgiving, I couldn't hide my joy.

Sides placed me center in the second line — the valley among the mountains. I had a feeling she was setting me up for a moment in the spotlight, and I couldn't wait to take it. 

But first, I had to the learn the routine. Given my background, Sides wasn't afraid to breeze through the choreography and speak in dancer-ese, using terms like bevel, ball change, and strut kicks, to name a few. 

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

My knowledge, however, only got me so far. The choreography was performed at double time — what would normally be one count was two. Still, I managed to keep up with the quick weight changes, all while keeping a smile on my face. Not to toot my own horn, but the girls were impressed and said I did a good job. Unfortunately, that would change the minute we moved into a kickline. 

The Rockettes perform more than 200 kicks a show, which requires stamina and skill. 

As we stepped together to form one line, I knew the famous kick line was quickly approaching. Sides informed me that we'd be performing "eye-high kicks" — aka kicking our legs to eye-level. At 5' 2", I thought I'd have an advantage — my legs have less distance to cover, after all. But in the world of the Rockettes, height is the ultimate advantage. 

But we weren't just kicking. We were kicking and jumping in unison. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that this was the third most embarrassing moment of the day. 

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

As you can tell by the photo, my kicks were nowhere near eye-level. In fact, I don't even think they got to chest level. But I didn't let that hold me back. On every even count, my leg was going as high as I could will it to go. The sweat was streaming at this point, and my smile downsized as I huffed and puffed to keep up with the women besides me. 

When we finished our 12 kick set — a small fraction of the 200-plus kicks they perform per show — I could feel my body rebelling. Even though I've kept up with dancing in my adult life, it was nothing compared to this. I was using arm, leg, and face muscles I never tapped into before.

But despite the pain that seared through my body, I loved what I was doing. 

Dancing with Rockettes reminded me of the joy your passions can bring to yourself and others. 

We wrapped up the choreography and performed the piece for our audience of two. Each time the music started, I was transported back in time to various moments in my life. I saw myself putting on a perfect show for my toys that couldn't even react. I saw myself stepping onto the stage of the local high school, scouring the crowd until I saw my mom wave at me. I saw myself dancing with my current friends for a sold-out crowd that cheers so loud we can barely hear the music.  

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

I remembered all the times my dancing has excited someone, and I immediately became jealous of the four women next to me because they get to experience that every day. 

"That's what keeps me coming back," Brooke Averi said. "And to know that I'm inspiring a whole generation of younger dancers to pursue their passions."

For Averi and the others, their experience with Rockettes has truly been a full circle moment. Because at one point in time, each of them was just like me: a young girl, staring at the woman in a sparkly dress wishing that could be her someday. Now, they are that woman to another girl out there. 

"The first time I saw the Rockettes was on TV watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade," Sides said. "So that first time I got to perform in the parade, it was my dreams coming to fruition." 

Sarah Schmalbruch / INSIDER

Unlike Sides, my dreams of being a Rockette never came true. Well, not officially. But maybe that was never the real dream. Maybe I just wanted to find something that I loved to do that would bring me and others joy. In that sense, my dream has become a reality. 

And if there are any little girls out there who want to be a writer that dances for fun, I'm happy to be their role model. 

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