#albeist mention

[residents-of-the-darkforest]

Dark Forest Resident: Crispblue

Aliases / Nicknames: The Cleanser (by self), Bitch, Starclan Hating Monster

Gender: she-cat

Sexuality: ??

Family: Blueflower (mother), Applestrike (father), Mossshriek (mate), Duskit Birdkit Dirtkit (kits)

Other Relations: unnamed mentor, unamed apprentice

Clan: shadowclan

Rank: warrior

Characteristics: ableist, hates "useless" cats, just horrendous

Number of Victims: 30

Number of Murders: 26

Murder Method: clawing, asphyxiation

Known Victims: Brownfoot, Dirtkit, various unamed elders, warriors, and apprentices

Victim Profile: deformed cats, and cats she considered ugly

Cause of Death: mauled and eaten by a wolf

Cautionary Tale: ??

Story:

Disgusting. 

All of them. 

There were so many revolting cats in the Clans, even polluting her own camp with their hideous bodies and horrible stench.

She couldn't stand it. By the fresh kill pile, sharing the nursery with her as she nursed, healing her of her wounds.

Those creatures were everywhere.

The first one she got rid of was easy to kill. Brownfoot was slow and feeble.

She took him outside "to get you some fresh air." She unsheathed her claws as she saw him limp out of the elders’ den. "Pathetic" elders didn't do shit for the Clan and they did even less when they were injured.

She clawed in the neck and held him down and watched him choke on his own blood.

She’d pick off a lot of them since then. Several medicine cats, some elders, lots of apprentices. They had always had an accident of some kind and as far as she was concerned, she was saving the leader the ordeal of having to tell them they couldn't be warriors.

The Clan was small and scared. Most cats assumed some badger or fox had been strong enough to overpower all the disabled cats, but this still didn't explain how some merely disfigured cats were dying in the same fashion. 

She was saving the Clans in her own warped mind. "Only the strong will survive and we need to hunt to live, so if you can’t hunt, you shouldn't be, here, right?"

One day she was out hunting and she chased a vole into some trees she was faced with a hungry wolf. Her shrieks had practically echoed within the wolf’s mouth as its teeth cracked her skull, stench choking her, but not before the beast took its time playing, tearing her, breaking her. And when it was all over, the clearing was a canvas of blood.

Additional Information:

--Submission by @purplegr33n​ Hope you don’t mind I made the death part longer. She deserves it.

--She has a mutation that makes her stripes not match.

--She killed one of her own kits for being “ugly.”

--She is just the worst.

--After avoiding her forth fight in the Death Ring she ran away and met Crowheart in the bog they are good friends

-Once she hanged on the starclan barrier for hours one starclan cat saw her dark red eyes and left.

[andrwminward]

Tagged by @dekarios 🧡🧡🧡

Book recommendation tag game

rules: recommend as many books as you like. please include genre and some basic information on it (either your words or a copy+paste synopsis). feel free to include cover art, a personal review, trigger warnings, and anything else! just don’t spoil the book!

Tagging: @deklo @bookishjules @kashisun & anyone else who wants to do it 🧡🧡🧡

All for the game by Nora Sakavic

Neil Josten is the newest addition to the Palmetto State University Exy team. He's short, he's fast, he's got a ton of potential — and he's the runaway son of the murderous crime lord known as The Butcher. Signing a contract with the PSU Foxes is the last thing a guy like Neil should do. The team is high profile and he doesn't need sports crews broadcasting pictures of his face around the nation. His lies will hold up only so long under this kind of scrutiny and the truth will get him killed. But Neil's not the only one with secrets on the team. One of Neil's new teammates is a friend from his old life, and Neil can't walk away from him a second time. Neil has survived the last eight years by running. Maybe he's finally found someone and something worth fighting for.

Warnings:

-violence

-violence (male to female)

-mild assault

-drug abuse

-drug misrepresentation

-alcohol abuse

-counselors/courts prescribing medication

-murder

-violence (guns, knives, fists, cigarette lighters, etc)

-sport violence

-casual violence

-familial death (referenced)

-gang violence

-torture (semi-heavily detailed)

-abuse

-abuse by a family member

-mentions of domestic abuse

-homophobia

-rape

-rape by a family member

-minor character death

-cutting

-suicide mentions

-mentions of sociopathy

-mentions of depression

-panic attacks

-knives being used

-character in a rehab/mental facility

-abuse in a rehab facility

-bribery of authority figures

-albeist language / homophobic slurs

-mention of animal cruelty

Angels before man by Rafael Nicolas

A Queer Retelling of Satan's Fall

In an eternal paradise, the most beautiful angel, Lucifer, struggles with shame, identity, and timidity, with little more than the desire to worship his creator.

It isn't until the strongest angel, Michael, comes into his life that Lucifer learns to love himself. Along the way, their friendship begins to bloom into something else. Maybe the first romance in the history of everything.

But this God is a jealous one, and maybe paradise is not paradise.

Warnings:

Blasphemy

Graphic violence

Graphic animal death

Sexual content

Self harm

Use of terms with incestuous connotations

Grooming

Mental instability

Off page sexual assault

On page sexual trauma

Abuse

Prince of sorrows (Rowan blood #1) by Kellen Graves

Without an academic endorsement to make him valuable to the high fey, Saffron will be sent back through the veil to the human world. The place he was traded from as a changeling-baby, and a place he is terrified of. And while getting an endorsement shouldn't be impossible, it's hindered by the fact his literacy is self-taught, using books stolen off of Morrígan Academy's campus of high fey students.

When mistaken identity leads to Saffron learning the true name of brooding, self-centered, high fey Prince Cylvan, what begins as a risk of losing his life (or his tongue) becomes an opportunity to earn the future he wants. In exchange for an endorsement, he and Cylvan form a geis where Saffron agrees to find a spell to strip power from Cylvan's true name. While Prince Cylvan doesn't know Saffron can barely read, Saffron is determined to meet his end of the deal in order to remain in Alfidel—or maybe just to remain by Cylvan's side, as affections grow stronger every night they spend alone in the library together.

But as other human servants soon fall victim to a beast known only as “the wolf”, Saffron realizes he has embroiled himself in a manipulative reach for power like he never anticipated—and even Prince Cylvan cannot be trusted. Between the wolf, uncovering forbidden magic, and his growing feelings for the prince, Saffron will have to decide which is most important to him—his endorsement, the lives of his friends, or the prince’s life and wellbeing.

Warnings

Physical abuse

Sexual content

Blood

Death

Sexual harassment

Confinement

Drug use

Classism

[jojopolls]

I love sbr but man a certain section of it's fandom (dudebros) has definately manage to alienate other part fans from it. Not to mention how their "analysis" is straight up wrong.I am so tired of their albeistic "jokes" on Johnny and villify him all the while fanboying over FW and keep saying how "he was right".

YUP!! Like I said, there are parts of SBR that I really liked, and Johnny and Gyro are some of my fave characters in all of jojo!! It's mostly all of FV's shit that I hate, I can't believe all he had to do was talk about a napkin and now half the fandom think he's the best character in the entire series

[redacted-scp-antics]

English is not my main language, so... I will most likely make some mistakes (grammar etc.) but I will try my best. :>

I'm really nervous about this whole thing. I don't know how people will react to this blog. But I'm just going to yeet myself into cold water and see what happens.

Anyway, I created this blog because I wanted to see what it would be like to have my very own centered around a certain topic. This little blog will be focused on my own SCP canon plus the ocs in it. This includes the O5 council, agents and members from other GOI.

WARNING!! This blog will mention serious topics!! Some characters have dealt with bullying, homophobia and more!! Please be careful. I will try my best to tag posts like that include triggers.

Also I won't reveal my exact age but I am over 18 years old. So I would prefer that everyone who might interact with this blog is also an adult.

DNI (if you think I forgot something, please let me know):

- transphobes

- homophobes

- anti lgbtqia+ overall

- maps

- albeists

- racists

- anti oc x canon (seriously, people who do oc x canon are just people and if you think a ship is problematic you can calmly tell them)

Since this is my first ask blog, I still have to figure things out, I'm not an expert :3

For now anonymous asks are turned off, I might turn them on eventually.

Alright, enough chit-chat. Let's jump over to the SCP stuff .

First things first: This blog is indeed inspired by other similar blogs. Tumblr has some really cool blogs focused on SCP content.

Let me finally start talking a bit more about my canon:

1. The veil is NOT lifted.

2. The Foundation has a pretty chill relationship with the GOC and Serpent's Hand.

3. Their relationship with the Chaos Insurgency... well, it's complicated.

4. There are different humanoid species. This includes the Saints, Starborn and Stareater.

5. Most characters you might know from the wiki do not exist in this canon. However, who knows? We might actually encounter a Clef from another canon.

I... I'm going to drop a character list. Because I have a bunch of them, and a list might help you all keeping track. Also, all of the characters are adults.

_Ethics Committee_

- Melia Callais (she/her)

_Foundation personnel_

- Evangeline Alcalde (she/her): agent • Factotum member of Five

- Marin (he/him): agent with the codename "Cheetah" • very close with Ten

- Aziel Madris (he/him): agent [MTF Nine-Tailed Fox]

- Lucan Maleko (he/him): agent [MTF Avalon's Wake] • formerly a Chaos Insurgency member • good friends with Eleven

- Kaja Diven (she/her): agent in Six's team • skilled pilot

- Avan Makarovich (he/him): agent with the codename "Bluebell" [MTF Red Right Hand]

- Elijah Makarovich (he/him): agent [MTF Hammer Down] • Avan's father

- Vaughn Feyrer (he/him): agent [MTF Street Samurai]

- Alise (he/him): doctor

- Ava Cloutier (she/her): anomaly

- Amber Rayleight (she/her): therapist

- Kajani (he/him): agent and caretaker

- Mordesh (she/her | he/him | it/its | they/them): anomaly

- Cassiopeia (she/her): anomaly

_O5 Council_

- O5-1: Merakhi (he/him) • "The Liar / The Deceiver"

- O5-2: Eliseo (he/him) • "Eye of Themis / Sword of Justice / Law's Right Hand"

- O5-3: Malakias (he/him) • "The Hunter / The Executioner"

- O5-4: Astra (he/him) • "Storyteller / Fairytale Prince"

- O5-5: Sanghae (he/him) • "Soultamer / The Host of a Thousand Souls / Ghost Catcher"

- O5-6: Marley (he/him) • "Eagle Eye / Harpy's Talon"

- O5-7: Lusca (trans ftm he/him) • "Sea Wasp"

- O5-8: Layne (he/him) • "Copper Heart / Child of Rust"

- O5-9: Rye (he/him) • "Frogcore"

- O5-10: Verean (he/him) • "Electric Eye / The Spy"

- O5-11: Alain (he/him) • "Ventriloquist"

- O5-12: Jolyon (he/him and they/them) • "Magician / Spell Caster"

- O5-13: Niran (he/him) • "Keeper of Light"

- Administrator: Ascian (he/him)

_Other_

- Sage Rivera (he/him): GOC agent • works very closely with the Foundation and is a part of the MTF Abyss Gazers

- Fiera (she/her): GOC • Sage's close, if not even his best, friend ��� very skilled pilot and medic

- Olivia Cardoso (she/her): Serpent's Hand

_Saints_

- Liardin (he/him)

- Satia (she/her)

- Satus (he/him and they/them) • Satus is not his real name. Just the name the different GOI use.

_Starborn_

- Lacania (she/her)

- Eloni (she/her)

- Revan (he/him)

- Ascian (yes, the Administrator.)

- Alkaois (he/him)

_Stareater_

- Carmient (he/him)

- Ashem (he/him)

- Lynia (she/her)

- Noire (he/him)

- Lacereil (he/him)

(If you come up with headcanons for my characters, please feel free to tell me. I love headcanons :3

One more thing: I did not mention the sexualities of these characters. But none of them is straight.)

[satorena]

# RULES 2 LIVE BY ( written by rena )

failing in respecting these rules will get you blocked. click here to head back to the main page !

first and foremost, my reader will always be depicted as females/assigned female at birth. it won’t always be mentioned in the tags but will be hinted at by nicknames used and descriptions of their bodies.

minors are not welcomed. no interacting with any of my posts whatsoever. ageless blogs are not welcomed either. i strongly advise to reread the warning on my pinned post or you will be blocked.

requests are always open but please be patient! i’ve got a life outside of tumblr and so the writing process may take time. make sure to read what i will and won’t write below before asking. if they go against what i’m comfortable with, they will be ignored/deleted.

there will be no tolerance of any sort of bullying on this blog. homophobes, racists, albeists, etc.— any kind of slandering against any community is never welcomed here and will get blocked.

if you support israel, blocked.

try not to ask to be mutuals! it’s kind of awkward, but i’m always down to make friends here, so long as we’ve interacted either through works or inboxes.

when writing requests, keep them short and sweet! the less detailed, the better and more likely i am to prioritize it.

plagiarism, modification or translation of any kind is not tolerated. big fucking no. works and themes. not only will you get blocked but definitely reported. writing takes time and creativity, and that isn’t something for anybody to play with.

# STICK & ICK ! ( will and won’t )

i will write for most things apart from . . .

sub spaces, character x character, stepcest/incest, male readers, alpha/omega/beta verse, supernatural beings, yandere behaviour, aged up minors, watersports, vomit, scat, feet kinks, lactaction kink, wide age gaps, non-consensual fantasies.

𝒊. keep in mind, i am allowed to refuse to write anything else i may not feel comfortable writing.

© satorena 2023 // do not plagiarize, translate, nor modify any of my themes or works. reposting on other platform is prohibited without permission.

[loserley]

LESS THAN ZERO

basic dni ( homophobic, lgbt phobic, sexist, racist, albeist, etc. )

i'm an atheist so pls don't be pushy when it comes to religious topics.

don't be rude to the people who requested something, its their request, not yours. :)

NOTES

i rant in my blog sometimes so if you find it uncomfy just please ignore it!

my works will be containing curse words from time to time, depending on who i'm writing for and what character.

i use petnames in other languages in my works, or in english as well. this warning might come in handy when i'm writing for characters such as; reyna, gekko, sage, etc.

i write for valorant (obviously) so gun/gunshots or anything related to that will be mentioned in some cases. i do put warnings on my fics before i post the said fic so if it makes you uncomfy, best to not read it for your own comfort.

i can decline requests if i want to or if it makes me uncomfortable. i write for fun and when i'm bored so i may come and go and never come back for a few months depending on what peaked my interest :)

[residents-of-the-darkforest]

Next submission features major albeist stuff

warning

[lnane]

Any sentence that seriously starts with this and is not making fun of freud is wrong and bad

[nadineselfships-archived]

wow so you self ship with the retard skeleton bro from undertale? I hope you don't have kids with him we already have lildreamysoul who has a retard baby with sans we don't need anymore mongoloids in our genepool

I know this was meant to be mean or something but I can't stop giggling I'm sorry asdfghjkl You do realise they're not real right anon? They, they're two dimensional drawings?? Literally pixels on a screen??? They can't add to whatever imaginary gene pool you're thinking of because they aren't real??? Hello?????

And I do have some awesome fankids with Papyrus now that you mention it!! Three in fact!! And they love little Berlin and their aunt Ash!! Die mad about it I guess anon idk we're having fun and I'm sorry you can't do the same honestly

[blanket-fish]

Like idk but my physics teacher is allowed to call one of my classmates 'Straightners' and another one 'Binbag' and yet if a teacher is caught calling my trans boy friend by his preferred name or pronouns they get in trouble

[nbapprentice]

(regarding zach hadel, also please make sure i am on anon) i only did like a two hours research about him and i am just sitting here, mouth wide open, wondering someone like him could yet a show on 2021 (or 22 i could) some things that stick out

1. his internet avatar persona is pretty much an antisemitic caricature, and so is the character he plays on smiling friends

3. as previously mentioned, he used to be an active guest on the podcast sleepycabin/sleepycast, where he openly defended shadman and often used racist, anti-gay, and albeist slurs (n word, r slur, and the f and q slur among other). keep in mind these were fully uncensored

4. he also made a bunch of antisemitic jokes and joked about that ‘he has a disturbing amount of knowledge on hitler and ww2’

5. he is also a frequent guests on his close friend Chris o’neil/oneyng let’s play channel oneyplays (the fact that if you search oneyplays on tumblr and get no results is because of staff banned the entire tag due to hate speech concerns, that says a lot) where, guess what, HE STILL REGULARLY USES SLURS HE CANT RECLAIM.

6. speaking of his friends chris, chris still is one of the most famous newgrounds users. his career is based on racist, sexist, homophobic, albeist, and pedophilic cartoons. like he did a sexual parody of harry potter when the actors were still minors and he was an adult

this isnt like private information i had to dig out of dead accounts btw, this is away from like a google search, HOW THE ACTUAL FUCK DID THIS GUY GET A SHOW??? the absolute worst part is that no one has mentioned any of this, and there are so many people who are HAPPY about him getting his own cartoon. i am at an absolute loss of words.

what can i say other than What the Fuck

[carouselkiddo]

🌈Welcome🌈

to my blog!

If you're new here, hiya! I'm Maddie, an age regressor + dreamer. This is the spot where I can express myself in tiny space, and talk about it without feeling embarassed! I will be posting + mostly reblogging educational n fun content about agere/agedre, stuff that makes me happy in tiny space, and other related sfw content.

About me:

🌈big age is 20 yrs old, little age is 4-9!

☁️pronouns r she/her!!

🌈am new to age regression!

☁️diagnosed ADHD, anxiety, n depression

🌈i love love love primary colors n rainbows!!

☁️my fav cartoons are Spongebob, My Little Pony, Paw Patrol, Blues Clues, Miraculous Ladybug, Sonic X, Phineas and Ferb, Monster High

🌈fav movies are Mulan, The Polar Express, Frozen, Turning Red, The Little Mermaid, Zootopia, Barbie Princess and the Pauper

☁️fave games r minecraft, animal crossing new horizons, poptropica, club penguin, Wizard 101, Pixie Hollow

🌈i watch lots of youtube!! mainly markiplier and jackcepticeye, they are my comfort youtubers :D

☁️while in tiny space, i love to draw, color, play pretend n cuddle wif my stuffy friends, play n snuggle wif my doggie, play with toys, play video games, play outside, watch cartoons n movies, eat snacks, take naps, n babble about stuff i like!!

🌈my fav foods are burgers n pizza!

☁️my fav animals are dogs, dragons n dinosaurs

{Hi hi! Heres a quick trigger warning as my DNI list is right around the corner! Just a heads up for the mentions of uncomfy terms.}

Ok, friends, this here DNI (do not interact) list is super important!

⚠️DNI IF ANY OF THE FOLLOWING APPLIES TO YOU:

🚩K1NK, P0RN, NSFW, G0R3, SH, SU1C1DE, ED, th1nspo, 18+ only blogs or anything that is otherwise unsafe for a child.

🚩Minors In K1NK + supporters , P3D0S + supporters.

🚩ddlg, cgl, abdl, ageplay or any variations of such.

🚩any form of bigotry or discrimination (anti-lgbt, lgbt+ exclusionists, anti-neopronouns, anti-xenogender, anti-mogai, anti-cglre, anti-agere, albeists, racists, etc. You get the picture.) Anyone who breaks this DNI will be blocked on sight. Thank you c:

I'm always lookin for age regressor friends, n my dms are open to mutuals :D please remember to read my DNI before interacting!! (Following, commenting, reblogging, liking, dming)

❤️🧡💛💚💙

Thank you so much for reading dis!

I hope you have a great day!

❤️🧡💛💚💙

[cameron-artist]

Actually requiring non-binary people to have "androgynous" voices is ableist!

How? Here's my example. My mama is hard of hearing. She hears best in a particular set of higher pitches. These are pitches perceived as "feminine". Literally my whole life I've had incidental voice training towards those pitches (all of my siblings have actually.) So if you are asking me to change my voice to make you more comfortable with the fact I am enby, you are saying I may not communicate more easily with my own mother.

Not to mention the number of people with vocal differences, inability/lack of desire for HRT, not wanting/not able to participate in vocal training, etc. And since I am not affected by most of these issues, I cannot effectively speak on them.

IF you are demanding people change their voice because of their gender, you are wrong and albeist. No it isn't always related to a disability but you don't have the right to know if it is or isn't. It doesn't matter even if there isn't a disability. Demanding someone change their voice is assuming that they can without hurting themselves or others in their life.

Tl;dr leave people alone about their voice, people don't owe you vocal androgyny!

[obaewankenope]

Okay so, I have ADHD. I'm 18 and was diagnosed 2 months ago? Maybe one? I don't remember. Anyways, I'm constantly thinking about and bouncing between the "hey it's okay you can't do this, it's not your fault, you just need some extra help and you can do it!!!" and "you're so stupid, just try harder, if you cared enough you'd be able to do it. why are you asking for special treatment and being a burden?" lines of thinking.

And that, especially lately, has led me to hyperfixating on the fear that, hey, maybe even when I do start medication and have finally figured out how to manage this with my therapist... what if I still can't do it?

This is especially difficult when it comes to art. I'm an aspiring artist & illustrator, and the struggle to do something that I love so much is so incredibly frustrating.

And it makes me worry that, even when I am finally medicated and have what I need, and even now when I'm REALLY struggling... maybe the problem is me and not the clearly albeist system I'm forced to work in.

Maybe I don't love it enough. Maybe I'm not as passionate and dedicated and driven to succeed with my art as I think I am. And it is so unbelievably soul crushing to think that because, that's it for me, that's all I can think to do with my life. I don't really have anything else, which I know sounds dramatic but, yeah. And the idea that I might not care for it enough, or that simply caring for it isn't enough, is really messing with me.

Uh so I'm not really sure what I'm asking aside from, WHAT DO I DO? How do I manage this? How do you deal with the imposter syndrome? Help????

Okay so, there's a LOT to unpack here, bean, and we're gonna do it now at 2:39am because why the fuck not, right?

You're 18 which means your brain is still developing. That means you have to deal with the chaotic brain chemistry that comes with growing on top of the chaos of adhd. That sucks.

The whole swings and roundabouts thinking on your ability is, sadly, very common. Too common to be as normalised as it is tbh. The first thought process is the Good One. That's the one that is Accurate To You And Your Needs. The second thought process is the Society Mindset Of Judgement.

I call thoughts like that "brain weasels" - a concept my friend Lily mentioned one day in chat and I just instantly accepted it as reality.

All those bad thoughts, all those moments of "you're a failure" are given a Name in my mind. That is Brian. Brain Weasel Brian. My mother calls them Brain Weasel Paddy.

I heartily advocate that sort of thing. Adopting this method of Attributing A Name to the thoughts that Don't Help You, is a good method of teaching your brain to separate the bad thoughts and the good ones that help.

Sometimes it doesn't work. In my depressive episodes, it doesn't work great if at all. But that happens. Sometimes nothing helps then. Sometimes existing is about as much as I can manage. It's Sucky but it's not permanent.

Rarely, is anything truly permanent. We just tend to think they are.

Next, hyper fixating on fear.

Again, pretty damned normal if also very sucky. Our brains, no matter whether we're neurodiverse or not, are Very Good at remembering the bad and giving up lots of Risk Lists to consider. This mechanism helps us as a species in the wild, of course, but in the world we live in now... well, it's not the best mechanism out there.

We can't stop it, though. It's part of our evolution as humans. We can figure out tricks to help manage it. See, the biggest problem we have with fear and anxiety is we try to push it down and away or we obsess over it. Those are the worst options.

Anxiety and fear have to be imagined to be like smoke. Its there in the air. Its part of it when a fire happens and we need fires for warmth. So anxiety and fear is natural. It's healthy to have both but not so much that we can't function. The mechanism is messing up if we can't function.

Anyway.

Have you ever tried to capture smoke in your hands? It's not possible. You can't cup your hands like you would with water, can't grip it like you would a solid. No. Because smoke is a gas and it moves and shifts and fills up any space it can.

Anxiety and fear are like smoke. They're part of everything and exists because of Reasons and they can be a good thing but can also be a bad thing too.

It can also become too familiar for us sometimes. Like a smoker who lights up and savours the smell of a burning cigarette.

We cling to what we know even if what we know is bad for us. It's human nature. But just because we cling to what we know doesn't mean we can't be brave and let it go. That's human nature too.

We're a species of messy contradictions, after all.

Medication helps the brain chemistry and assists that fear and anxiety mechanism. It's not a cure, contrary to belief, but it will help. Therapy helps you work through things and medication helps settle your brain which will help you further.

Does that mean it's going to fix you? No, because you're not broken. You're different but not broken.

With your art and illustration and your desire to become an illustrator, I can wholly understand the frustration you feel.

But I wonder, does that frustration stem from fear of failure or from feeling so many emotions and not being able to figure out their source?

If its the former, then that's understandable. We all fear failure. But sometimes, it's not failure we actually fear. What we really fear is success. Because we don't know what to do if we succeed. That's a long term thing.

Failure can be immediate and short term. It's something we can think about in the immediate future because our brains are able to follow the tangent of time enough for that.

But success. Success means long term considerations. It means thinking about what comes after. It means considering potential promotions, opportunities, work pieces, connections and so on. It means thinking of those things beyond the short term where our brain's are most comfortable.

ADHD brains are not really built for long term planning. We're good planners for short term things. Good problem solvers. But rarely is it a long term sort of solution we come up with.

Not because we can't, but because we get so mirred in the details, in the What Ifs and the Possibilities that we lose our focus on the Whole Picture. We lose the tangent.

I don't necessarily think you're not passionate enough. Hardly anyone who draws lacks passion. They may lack technique, but passion... That's something any artist needs in my opinion. Even just a spark.

But being able to use that passion, to convey it, now that's the challenge. That's Hard.

Sometimes it's next to impossible.

The thing is, ADHD and Autism make you feel things Deeply and Chaotically. This makes you struggle to process those feelings.

Being a young adult with Expectations and Responsibilities on top of sucky brain growth chemistry just makes that struggle worse.

You may not be able to channel your passion into your art currently, but that doesn't mean you don't have it.

Think of your passion like a tube that's got a blockage in it. The pressure inside is immense but you've got nothing on hand to remove the blockage. It'll take time to develop the tools, to find them, to help. Or. It might have to remove itself.

This doesn't make you lacking in passion. It just makes you temporarily injured in the passion department. We don't blame someone for a sprained ankle resting. Don't blame yourself for taking time off because of this.

Imposter syndrome is... Hard. So, so hard.

I don't have an answer for you about how to handle it. I do a pretty poor job of it myself. I fake confidence, am awful at accepting praise, and constantly feel inadequate. I just hide it really well.

But that's emotion. That's fear and doubt and anxiety. That's societal expectations stoking the emotional disturbance of imposter syndrome.

Logic tells me different.

But logic is hard to believe. Especially when the emotions are very Loud and Distracting.

Sometimes you have to call those doubts and fears for what they are: Brain Weasels.

Sometimes you have to think of it all like it's smoke.

Sometimes you have to sit down and meditate, crossing a mental bridge between reason and emotion to deliver a message to both sides.

We are individuals who pick out pebbles from the river and admire them. Sometimes we keep them. Sometimes we put them back. Most times, we move on. Those pebbles are difficulties, challenges, doubts.

ADHD tends to try and keep the pebbles. Imposter syndrome uses them as building blocks.

Sometimes you have to dig out the foundations and toss those pebbles back before you can start to work on fixing up the rest.

This has become very rambly now, I'm sorry. Its 3:24am and I need to sleep. I do hope this helps in some way, though. If not for you, then for others.

[halfusek]

Transcripted if it’s hard to read!

Aforementioned pricing is for my simple / cartoony style. I can draw in a more complex style (more details / more realistic anatomy). This will add $5 to the total price.

Colored sketch without lineart has the price equal to a just linearted artwork. Shading’s price can also be reduced / increased depending on its complexity.

Colored lineart +$5.

You need to provide a reference. If the character doesn’t have an existing reference, I have to design this character, which will add $10 to the total price.

Price of the background depends on its complexity.

I can do animatics, comics and short animations – bigger projects like that can be discussed individually.

RULES:

Payment in USD up front via PayPal.

Non-commercial use in general. Up to discussion (this will affect the price).

You can repost it anywhere with credit (and for example use as your icon).

I will draw: violence, gore, body horror, suggestive, nsfw.

Rules on nsfw: nothing out of things I won’t draw, I am free to refuse (just as I’m free to refuse doing any sort of commission), nothing involving my characters, I will not be posting it publically and you are not allowed to post it publically (I don’t care if you privately share it with someone, but no public spaces).

I will NOT draw: realistic gore and animals; bad shit (incest, pedophilia, anything having racist / lgbtphobic / albeist implications, fetishising any kinds of people, rape/noncon, if i forgot to mention anything in here I’m still free to refuse doing a commission if it feels immoral or uncomfortable to me).

If you want to support me, I also have a kofi page <3

https://ko-fi.com/halfus

Reblogs always appreciated~! Thanks in advance for sharing/buying!

[residents-of-the-darkforest]

Yeah Morningsky is a transphobe and an abelist... she has a very twisted view of what the "perfect" family should be like...

@ambitiousauthor

aight time to die, Morningsky, I guess